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#And so we'll have to see what happens from there
dduane · 22 hours
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Today's auroral shenanigans
Relatively speaking, yesterday night (May 11/12) was a bit of "not much" for aurora-watchers, compared to the night of the 10th/11th. (Which, to be fair, was a most unusual event, and it wouldn't be surprising if it wasn't equaled for a long, long time.)
Nonetheless, the Sun continues to be in an interesting mood at the moment... specifically the big sunspot region AR3664, which is the one responsible for the auroral extravaganza of May 10th. You can just see it in this next image, getting ready to rotate away from us around the Sun's rightward limb.
(For those interested in scale: that complex of sunspots is about fifteen times the diameter of the Earth. You could drop the whole planet into the middle of the biggest one and lose it. A timelapse video of its growth is over here at YouTube, if you're interested.)
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As AR3664 continues to spit out CMEs and flares, the NOAA has issued a geomagnetic storm watch for today, tonight and tomorrow—with the suggestion that conditions like those of the night of the 10th may in the relatively short term be about to repeat themselves.
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This is a "watch" rather than a "warning," reflecting some uncertainty over exactly how the various incoming coronal mass injections are likely to behave on reaching Earth orbit. (Also, the CMEs aren't being aimed straight at us, but off to one side as the sunspot region rotates further and further toward the sun's edge: so this adds somewhat to the unpredictability of it all.)
The animation below comes from the SOHO spacecraft's LASCO C3 coronagraph instrument. It starts on May 10th and runs through until early on the morning of May 12th. You can see the newest incoming CMEs right at the end of it.
(BTW, I think the two bright objects to right and left of the Sun are probably comets passing through, as LASCO images normally mask out any planets that would be in view.)
Anyway, as for what this means for auroral activity tonight? It's tough to tell as yet. The planetary K index (which expresses the relative strength of geomagnetic storms) has dropped back down into near-baseline levels at the moment.
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But when those new CMEs and the solar wind associated with them hits the atmosphere, things may change suddenly.
We'll soon see...
And an afterthought: AR3664 will soon be off around the Sun's edge, and invisible to us. It'll be interesting to see what happens to it after that.
The Sun takes 27 days to rotate, as a whole: the poles take longer, the equatorial regions a shorter time. In a couple of weeks or less, what will greet us, rotating around toward Earth's POV on that left-hand side? Will AR3664 have dissolved and vanished away, as sunspot groups so often do... or grown even bigger?
ETA 1, 12 May 2024, 1820 UT: Like a kitty coughing up hairball after cosmic hairball, AR has popped yet another X-class flare.
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ETA 2, May 13 2024, 0100 IDT / 0000 UT: New G3 storm warning dropped.
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1K notes · View notes
oukabarsburgblr · 3 days
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Hi! Love your work! I dont know if your requests are open but Id love to see more of your Haikyuu work! Loved the the recent one and i just cant stop rereading it.
I wonder what would happen if reader was hit on by one of the other volleyball players before/after the matches. I just wanna see the three boys get jealous and protective honestly hahahd ofc if you dont want to write this its okay too! ( Ps. I also love ur Daisuke one, i love him hes so cute 🥰🥺 cant wait to see more of ur work )
drabble...aftermath of Karasuno
taglist : @ayuxiru @tehyunnie @rainnyydaysworld @webwanderer
i stopped working on my haikyuu fics bc i started s4 and i could NOT see atsumus face HAHHAHH idky i HATE HIM ARGH/jk. We love Daisuke in this household. Can anyone tell Daichi is my favourite? HAHA
this will be the last one for the crows CAW CAW
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harassed, dark in general
Find out more under the cut!
[SCENARIOS LOADING...]
Another team harasses the manager!
[START SCENE]
"Hey! Karasuno's manager! Don't make such an ugly face."
A certain (h/c) frowned, being cornered by tall volleyball players from other schools. He had just went to retrieve the paper rosters from the organizers for their current tournaments at the Sendai Gymnasium where Preliminaries are being held when he was stopped by students from other schools.
"You look like you don't have a lot on your hands right now. Why don't you come with us? Free some tension...you probably need it." A hand grasped (m/n)'s shoulders to which the (h/c) swatted it away. "Don't touch me." He hissed as he tried to move past them but another shoved him back against the walls, them moving closer to the manager.
"Hey hey. We're all friends here, right?" Hissing in pain as the hand lodged in his shoulder pressed his nails further, crinkling his black jumpsuit. "Listen here, fucker. I don't know what household you grew up in, but go ride someone else's dick. Better yet, why don't you go suck each other off? Since you're so desperate for some action."
(m/n) spat, his foul mouth and his temper wasn't a good combination but it was the right mixture for this situation. He pushed the players' arm and was ready to leave until his hair was clenched painfully.
A yelp from (m/n) and the ringleader of the group pulled his face close. "Nice face but a repulsive tongue...damn and I thought we could do this nicely. We'll find a use for your mouth soon." "Let go, asshole-"
Fuck, who do they think they are? The only one grabbing my hair is usually-
"I suggest you let him go."
A heavy voice uttered from behind them, catching the attention of the group. Asahi clasped the hand that seized (m/n)'s head. "Before I break your wrist." He muttered with a death glare, the light in his eyes gone.
"Fuck! Is he the coach or something?!" One of them whispered, scanning his mature features. Someone grasped (m/n)'s hand, pulling him away from the group. "Learn how to take a hint when someone says they don't like you." Sugawara pushed the manager behind him.
"Or go die in some random dump, you trash."
He stated blandly, his voice losing any cheery tone he would always carry. How ironic. (m/n) could never be more glad that the third years were here, clenching the papers in his hand. He felt someone gently pull his bicep.
"Go." Daichi muttered. "The team's around the corner. Go see Kiyoko for..." He brushed (m/n)'s head, where his hair was tousled.
The only one who would usually, or rather the only one, grabbing (m/n)'s head, tugging his hair, digging their nails into his scalp was Daichi Sawamura.
The (h/c) didn't think twice to leave the scene, not leaving a glance to the yelling players who had harassed him, Daichi particularly approaching the one who had pulled (m/n)'s hair.
-
He didn't want to be here anymore, (m/n) lazily draped himself across the railings. Only one manager was allowed on the benches so he and Yachi had to sit up in the audience' seats but he asked for some alone time from Yachi, her concerned about him after hearing that he was disturbed by a team from another school earlier.
Hinata had jumped up and about when (m/n) returned to their team, demanding to know who had hurt his friend and Kiyoko checked his scalp, making sure nothing was broken and everything was fine. Tanaka was adamant on being a good senior and wanting to avenge his manager so he went to help the third years who were confronting the aggressors but immediately retreated, staying quiet when Ennoshita asked what they were up to.
The games started and the first match went well, battling up against a two meter player. Daichi didn't speak to him yet. (m/n) noticed a bruise forming on Asahi's jaw and Sugawara only smiled at him quietly.
Second game came around and (m/n) held back a flight of curses from his mouth when the team Karasuno had to play against were the same players who had cornered him earlier, their captain glaring holes into Daichi. He noticed a few of them were missing, specifically the bitchy ringleader.
"Hey, (m/n). Thought you'd be down there this time."
Oikawa approached his cousin, leaning onto the railings in a similar fashion to the (h/c). "I guess all third years in your team is staying huh." He poked (m/n). "Yeah." He mumbled. "Looks like yours too."
(e/c) glanced at the Seijoh team that were currently watching over Karasuno's briefing by their coach. He noticed a new player. Someone that has a tennis ball for a head.
"Well, we're gonna beat Shiratorizawa this year. I'm gonna show Ushiwaka who's boss." "You say that at every game." The setter slapped (m/n)'s back, the latter yelping and smacking his laughing cousin. "So gloomy and for what? Your team seems to be energetic-...well they're playing more aggressive than usual."
Asahi slammed the ball set by Kageyama, earning a point as the libero was unable to receive the spinning ball. The ace looked furious, his eyebrows furrowing as he asked Kageyama for a faster set. Sugawara was itching to get on the court, pacing around, warming his legs up so he could be ready when he had a chance to play. Daichi was silent, his usual words of affirmation to the team gone. Only Tanaka and Nishinoya cheering when they won a point.
"We're going to win. Against them at least." Daichi muttered, his eyes gazing up at (m/n) when Coach Ukai took a timeout and asked what was wrong and why their play styles had differ today.
(m/n) stared back but quickly looked away when he felt butterflies in his stomach. He couldn't tell what those insects were trying to tell him. Daichi had warmed his bed a lot for the past month, even his parents assumed he was his boyfriend by how often he had came over to his house.
Karasuno won a fast game. Two sets straight, 25 - 17 and 25 - 13. The last set where all the third years were deployed went by quick, Asahi shining as the MVP.
"Well, that's my cue. I wonder when we'd play against you, it'd be any different." "....It will." Oikawa raised an eyebrow. "Thought you'd support me this time. Given how your team lost on our last match." "But they'll win."
(m/n) peered at Oikawa, from the corner of his eyes. "My team will win beating yours, Tooru." The setter only stared down at the manager with a smirk.
"What's with the change of heart?" "..."
He didn't reply, only getting up to greet the team as he stood in the hallways, letting Hinata crash into him. Sugawara pulled the middle blocker off of him. "Now now. Stop causing trouble or Takeda-sensei won't let us watch the other teams play." They were done for the day and as requested by Kageyama, they went to see Seijoh's match.
Sugawara held (m/n) behind however, letting the team go first as they stood in an isolated staircase. He ran his fingers through (h/c) hair, his eyes squinting at the manager as he smiled reassuringly. "I hope you're alright, (m/n). We beat them for you. Those idiots. People who have nothing else to do but lay their waste on innocents like you."
The (h/c) hummed uneasily, leaning his head on the setter's shoulders and his fingers clutching onto the latter's jersey. "I didn't mean to talk to them. They cornered me." "I know, I know." Sugawara cooed, his other hand caressing (m/n)'s back.
A similar but earlier incident had happened, whereas a student confessed to the (h/c), who declined but Hinata excitedly told the team and Sugawara had an outburst in private, accusing (m/n) of cheating behind their backs despite them having no declaration, only taming (m/n) into their current relationship.
"Did I ever scare you? You look at me like I'm going to snap your neck at any second." The setter teased, his hand trailing over (s/c) neck, his fingertips pressing onto (m/n)'s Adam's apple. "No. You wouldn't." That was a bluff.
He had learned that Sugawara had the most violent tantrums out of the three. Paranoid, spiralling about what (m/n) does when he wasn't around. The (h/c) had learned what to say, what to do overtime, to ease the third year.
Said third year smiled at him. "If anyone ever approaches you, like earlier, scream our names okay." He always made sure to include Daichi and Asahi. "Remember, you're our favourite."
He winked at the (h/c) who didn't give much of a reaction, only hugging the setter. Was there any difference between those assholes and the third years in Karasuno? Both of those groups forced him, into these uneasy situations, Karasuno taking a longer approach.
Crows tend to build their nests with meticulous resolve, choosing the right twigs and taking the softest materials for the lining. Karasuno did live up to their name, (m/n) completely accepting his predicament, laying in the den Daichi, Sugawara and Asahi had woven for him.
Sugawara pulled (m/n)'s face up, smiling at him before pressing his lips to the (h/c) who opened his mouth when the setter swiped his tongue on his lips. "Let me hear you, (m/n)." The setter muttered as he pressed his wet muscle against (m/n)'s caressing his palate and pressing their bodies closer.
"Mmnff ahh! N-Not here Suga- ahk!" (m/n) choked when he felt a hand cupping his crotch, his breath shaky and coming out in stutters as he pushed Sugawara's chest. His cheeks were hot and he clenched his fist on Suga's jersey.
"Hahaha is it because we're in public? You'd be much more in trouble with Asahi then." The setter pulled away, letting (m/n) breathe as he dragged him up the stairs and they stepped into the auditorium seating. "Go. You owe me a date for this." He kissed the (h/c)'s forehead before pushing him to the row where Asahi and Daichi were.
The setter walked past them, opting to sit beside the second years, distracting them when they asked where was the manager. Said manager stood nervously, Asahi and Daichi silent, both of them sat in the furthest behind row, whereas everyone was sitting close to the railings to watch the games.
Usually (m/n) had no problem conversing with them, the third years constantly talking first but here they are staying silent. "...Good game." He referred to the two sets they stole from those assholes.
The captain didn't even look at him, only staring into space with a frown on his face. Asahi spared him a glance before beckoning the (h/c) to sit next to him. But as he was about to sit, the brunette pulled his arm, making him land in Asahi's lap instead.
"Huh? What are you-" He was silenced by Daichi's glance, his heart racing as Asahi adjusted him, placing him directly on top his crotch. "Sorry, (m/n)." The ace buried his face into the (h/c)'s shoulders. "Let me borrow you for a bit."
Here? In public? Where anyone could see him being used like a fucking-
His hands shook as he tried to peel himself off Asahi, but the latter only tightened his hold, crushing his waist with his muscular arms. "I'm sorry." The brunette mumbled apologies and (m/n) could feel his erection pressing up against his pants. He prayed the others wouldn't turn around. Daichi didn't move a finger, (m/n) couldn't read his face as he hopelessly squirmed in Asahi's lap.
He's going to see. He's going to look at me and see me like this.
His heart was beating fast, the ace still breathing heavily behind him and grinding his bottom on him. Daichi still didn't give any reaction. (m/n) felt his heartstrings pulled as the captain didn't give a damn of what was happening to him. Unintentionally, he glorified- favoured? Treasured the ravenette the most, the one who always seemed so distant from him yet was so close and quick to clog his throat-
Tears welled up in his (e/c) eyes as he turned his face away when he saw Tsukishima glanced at him from the corner of his sight. He genuinely prayed that no one else would see him in this shameful state.
Asahi stopped bucking his hips when a high pitched heave escaped from the (h/c)'s throat, (m/n) holding in a sob as he carved his nails into the ace's arm. "Shh...it's fine. No one saw anything. They just think you're sitting on me." He whispered into the manager's ear who shook his head. Tsukishima saw him and he was one of the smart ones. The rest of Karasuno hadn't seen but what about the other teams? Strangers who might pass by their rows. He hated how his three seniors didn't give a damn about his pride.
Asahi didn't make himself obvious, he just wanted to loose some steam is all. In the end, he did use (m/n) like those harassers did albeit tamer than expected but the intentions were there nonetheless. (m/n) whimpered endlessly as he was placed to sit on the cushioned seat in the same one as the ace, still with Asahi seated close behind him. (s/c) hands trembled as he peered at the captain who cruelly ignored him the entire time.
A tear slipped down his cheek as Asahi cooed at him, apologising and kissing his ears while rubbing his waist. Ensuring the (h/c) that he didn't even got off or anything as he whispered sweet nothings with his apparent boner pressing against (m/n)'s back. The manager was much more prone to crying when they were in public.
His hands hugged Azumane's as he leaned back into the ace's body, his attempt to hide his figure as he pulled on the ace's black jacket. "Hic- you're so fucking- mean to me." (m/n) whined as Asahi peppered kisses all over his face, his stubble scratching against his skin.
"I won't do it again." The ace muttered, placing his chin on the manager's head. (m/n) peered up and noticed the forming bruise. His fingers went to delicately trace them. "I knocked his teeth out." Asahi mumbled.
"Would've done more if their manager hadn't come running." (m/n) flinched when he heard Daichi utter. The first he spoke around the (h/c) after the whole harassment he suffered.
Coarse rough fingers covered his eyesight, a fingertip pressing against his right eye lightly, brushing his lashes and the ace placed his face down where (m/n) had his hair violently tugged. "Tell me if you want him to lose more."
(m/n) didn't say anything, only nodding as he let the ace touch his body, caressing his chest and inhaling his scent. He didn't feel bad for the attackers at all. They dug their own grave for being assholes.
He caught Daichi staring at him, the captain still facing straight but his eyes gazed into the (h/c)'s face as he slowly returned his focus back onto Seijoh's match.
(m/n) managed to pull himself off of the ace when the games were over and Karasuno was preparing to leave. He made sure he avoided Tsukishima, not wanting to answer any of his probing questions. He had went ahead to wash the water bottles at a pipe when he heard footsteps behind him.
He looked behind him to see Daichi with the bottle carrier, the captain picking up the clean ones and placing it in its stations while (m/n) finished up the last one. A rare act of kindness from the captain to the (h/c). "Are there any others left?" (m/n) shook his head to Daichi's question.
The captain staring at him with dead eyes and (m/n) noticed the small blot of red on the edge of his knuckles. He didn't say anything, carefully pulling Daichi's hand and placing it under the tap, letting the water flow and washing the ravenette's hand.
Said ravenette stared down at him with his usual silence. At times like this, (m/n) could never tell what the captain was thinking. Was he observing on what he would do? No. Daichi was too confident in his...work. Of what he made of (m/n) (l/n).
Maybe he expected it. (s/c) fingers rubbed the knuckles, ridding the smell of blood and dirt as Daichi stood directly behind the manager. "Did they hurt you?" The manager shook his head again. "I'm fine. They didn't do much."
He could feel eyes boring into the back of his head, the captain glaring holes at the part where they pulled (m/n)'s hair. "It's good for you to know."
Know what? The manager wanted to ask but opted to stay quiet instead. He could feel Daichi leaning into his (h/c) hair, them letting the faucet run under their intertwined hands.
"No one else can hurt you." (m/n) carefully turned his head around and found black eyes staring down at him. "Not Suga and not even Asahi..." The captain muttered, his other hand gripping the manager's jaw, the latter letting out a small gasp.
"Only me. And it will stay that way as long as I'm here." He muttered, leaning so close to (m/n)'s face, the other baring a blank expression, knowing and not daring to show any sign of fear.
"Be aware and be good....I'll take care of you."
The (h/c) nodded, the grip on his jaw loosened and suddenly he was enclosed with a kiss. Daichi pressed against the manager and bit his lower lip, prompting moans as (m/n) shakily wrapped his arms around the captain's neck, his knees weak.
Both of them leaned against the sink and there was a faint sound of an ambulance siren that could barely be heard over the shaky gasps and lustful moans the manager spilled from his throat. It was wrong to love your abuser. (m/n) wouldn't call it love.
He would never care for someone like Daichi.
But he couldn't leave. There was no option for someone like him, he could only embrace and lay in the nest the third years made for him. A good first year to embrace their devilish intent.
[END SCENE]
I planned like a smut scene where daichi fucks him but im tired of writing smut tbh. Like i need inspo. But if u didnt notice daichis hand was bloodied bc he did sumth to the harassers which is why theres an ambulance in the last part.
Someone requested a sick scenario where reader gets sick and third years feel bad for him but tbh they wouldnt feel bad. Its just more of an excuse to fuck him over and ill give a very SIMPLE drabble for that bc ive delayed this way for too long
[SCENARIOS LOADING...]
(m/n) falls sick and the third years takes good care of him!
[START SCENE]
"Mmhhaa mmngg ahnn!"
(m/n) cried as he clutched onto Asahi's gakuran, his back against the wall and his legs wrapped around the ace's waist. The brunette's cock deep in him as they hid in an isolated bathroom stall, the third year pulling him in before classes were starting.
It was the norm for him. And he thought his body could adjust but he wouldn't notice he was slowly falling apart with how frequent the third years was using him for a quick fuck.
"T-Too fast! Ahn! Mmmn ahn ah ah!" His legs were shaking as Sugawara held his hips as he pounded his ass, the setter biting onto the manager's bare shoulder. The setter had whisked (m/n) away during their lunch break, him pulling the first year into the empty clubroom and bent him over the table to fuck his ass. He laughed when he found out Asahi had gotten to him first.
Daichi rarely took him during school hours or even school grounds for that matter. It was always the other two filling his ass up or suffocating his throat.
(m/n) choked as his head was pushed deeper into Asahi's crotch, his body naked as he sucked and licked at the dick while Sugawara was behind him shotgunning his bottom while grinding onto his naked butt. Saliva and precum was dripping onto the gym closet floor.
Sugawara always hold the keys and he'd use it as an excuse to stay behind, forcing (m/n) to help just for him to push him onto his knees and forced his cock into his mouth.
The manager knew his body wasn't feeling well that day. Seven rounds of sex in 8 hours was a record for him and a threesome in the mix? He went home sick and woke up with a sore throat and a burning fever.
(m/n) didn't go to school and he was glad he got to recover in his own bed but his mother suddenly barged in saying that his friends and his boyfriend were there to see him. The third years had neutral expressions when they entered his room, Sugawara easily conversing with his mother as she left the room, leaving her son alone with the monsters.
"I can't believe you actually got sick. I thought you were faking it so you could avoid me today." Sugawara grinned, sitting on the edge of (m/n)'s bed and placing his hand on the manager's forehead, pulling away and pulling out a fever plaster to paste it on the manager.
"I told you he was sick. He could barely stand when we were walking home and you thought he was faking it? You're scary, Sugawara." Asahi muttered to which the setter snapped back at him and they both argued over who had pushed (m/n) too far on yesterday's events.
Daichi ignored the two as he walked over to the bed, (m/n) could barely open his eyes, his skin hot and his head aching. He felt a hand pulling down his blanket and someone pushing his shirt up. A cold wet palm laid flat on his belly. The (h/c) squirmed but embraced the cool, his chest heaved up and down with slow breaths.
"Get better. Soon." The captain ordered. His dark eyes staring blankly at the manager. Sugawara turned to (m/n) and placed a kiss on his cheek. "You heard the captain." "Make sure to stay away from Suga."
The setter continued to yell at the ace, moving off of the bed and Daichi took the opportunity to take his place, his eyes now locking with (e/c) as he brushed his hand against (m/n)'s cheek fondly. "...I'll take care of you. I said I would." The ravenette muttered, the hand he had washed earlier trailing from his stomach to his chest, his hand under (m/n)'s shirt.
Daichi would only take him in his bed, in his room at nights after practice. Now, he was sick and laying in said bed with the captain looming over him, his eyes scanning his weak features.
(m/n) couldn't do a thing, letting the third year care for his sick body. They would come over after practice bringing homecooked meals they would make at Daichi's house. Sugawara often cleaned his body, using a wet towel to cool his warm limbs or helping him into his shower where he would- this made the manager's mom became more fond of the third years, letting them into her son's room at any time she was especially too busy to check in on her precious child.
The manager knew they were some sick fucks but he didn't expect them to go that far truly. Sometimes they would grope him, offering a quickie while mocking him by bouncing the (h/c) on their lap but Daichi was quick to stop them, especially Sugawara who was a bit too happy that (m/n) was weak in his hands, too frail to push away.
Asahi didn't do much, only going through the (h/c)'s belongings, digging through photo albums and taking some of his more personal article of clothings. Stupid pervert. He didn't even bother hiding it too. Daichi would force them to leave when it was almost midnight, him staying over and sleeping on a spare futon.
He was so attentive to the (h/c)'s needs, making sure he took his medicine and eating the required nutrition he needed. He kept his promise and (m/n) was able to recover in three days, returning to school after being deemed well enough by the captain.
Oddly enough, Sugawara and Asahi didn't pounce on him the second they met. Only ruffling his hair or hugging him and saying they were glad to see him well before leaving him alone. (m/n) thought that they finally got their senses knocked into them.
Until night arrived and (m/n)'s mother made a fatal decision to allow Daichi to check her son for another time.
"D-Daichi! I c-can't- urmff! Mmngghaa- ackk!" One of his legs were being held up as he laid on his side, his mouth full with fingers and his hole throbbing around the thick dick shoved inside him. The ravenette slowly rolled his hips, feeling (m/n) tighten around him as the manager shot cum from his penis onto the bedsheets.
He loved when the (h/c) would come on his cock, fluttering walls around his base was pleasure as he quickly thrusted into the overstimulated first year, (m/n) drooling and choking on Daichi's coarse fingers.
"Three days. You have three days to compensate." Rounds of sex to reimburse the captain. Not for the care he provided. It was just more of a reason for Daichi to fill his hole and he had warned the other two not to approach him, wanting to have his ass all to himself for the next few days.
(m/n) let the captain use his hole, his body to fulfill his lust. He wasn't sick any longer and Daichi had promised to take care of him. He could only hope the ravenette doesn't have any plans to stay around him for the long-term. Excluding the fact that they were neighbours.
[END SCENE]
I just love daichi so much rahhh. Going to see the movie next week. Remember this is the last one for karasuno so dont request for this team any longer lovies💋 If karasuno was intense just imagine the power play with shiratorizawa MUAHAHAHHAHA
418 notes · View notes
seospicybin · 3 days
Text
TOO HOT TO HANDLE.
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EXTRA HOT REUNION
Han x reader. (s)
Too Hot To Handle Masterlist.
Synopsis: You and Han are having a Too Hot To Handle reunion to catch up on the life after the retreat (7k words)
Author's note: Just a reason to use THEE Han Jisung pic hehehe
HOST: Welcome back to the Too Hot To Handle Extra Hot reunion episode. Now, on my virtual sofa is a pair who actually managed to keep their hands to themselves, well, most of the time. Before we meet them, let's have a look at their time in the villa!
[VIDEO PLAYS]
HOST: Here they are, everyone! The winner of Too Hot To Handle season 3! [Applauds]
YOU: [Squeals] Hi! HAN: [Waves hand]
HOST: First, congratulations on winning Too Hot To Handle. I literally jumped on my seat when you were announced winners. What have you done with the money?
HAN: I spoiled my family with the money and shortly, after the retreat, we also took a vacation to celebrate our win [grins]
HOST: How about you, my darling?
YOU: The same for me. I treated my mom to a shopping spree and went out with some friends.
HOST: Honestly guys, I was genuinely happy for you both when Han, you asked her to be your girlfriend.
HAN: I owe that one to her, actually.
YOU: No, really. The way you've done it was just perfect [smiles]
HAN: She thought I was joking though [chuckles]
YOU: Obviously, because we joked around a lot and we talked about things then suddenly he asked me to be his girlfriend so I was like what? And he was like 'I'm serious' and my eyes got teary a bit [laughs]
YOU: It was lovely [smiles]
HOST: I'm holding myself back from asking this question but I think we all want to know if you are still together.
HAN: [Laughs]
YOU: [Laughs] No, we're not.
HOST: [Frowns] How did it end? What happened? Talk to me, guys.
YOU: We got used to each other, we always had each other and were with each other every day during the retreat, and then suddenly, nothing at all.
HAN: Yeah.
YOU: It was just really hard but we stayed in contact. We still text each other every other day, FaceTime.
HAN: Yeah [Nods]
YOU: And we're still close, it's still us [Smiles]
HOST: Flabbergasted. Completely flabbergasted. It's almost like... you started as friends, developed and blossomed, got in a relationship and you guys went on a vacation together then... you guys become friends again?
HAN: Yeah [laughs]
YOU: [Laughs]
HOST: Is it completely dead though? Cause I still can see the chemistry there, I'm not going to lie. Han close your ears because I'm going to ask the girl first.
HAN: [Covers ears]
HOST: My darling, will you ever get back with Han
YOU: [Sheepishly smiles] I don't know. I haven't been dating in a long time so you never know what could happen.
HOST: Okay girl, now it's your turn to cover your ears.
YOU: Okay [covers ears]
HOST: Han, will you ever get back with her?HAN: Can't say anything [chuckles] because I haven't seen her in a while but who knows? [Shrugs]
HAN: But we shared such an incredible journey and we'll always be able to celebrate that so who knows, really.
HOST: Well, I think you guys are well-deserved winners.
HAN: Thank you!
HOST: Thank you so much for taking the time to talk to me.
YOU: Thank you. Bye [blows kisses]
HAN: [Waves hand]
-
A MONTH LATER
Maybe it is what it seems to be.
Han invited you to see him performing and that's all, you shouldn't be overthinking it. It's just a friendly gesture because that's what you are now, just a friend to him.
Why you dressed nicely is because you wanted to look good and why you're nervous is because you haven't seen him in a while, these are all reasonable.
You arrived at the bar where he's going to perform a few minutes late, not sure what to do first, get a drink or try to find him first?
Since you need a little liquor courage, you head to the bar to order a drink and on the way there, you walk past the way to the restroom and it gets you wondering if you should check for your appearance first.
There you go, you overthinking it again. You get a hold of yourself and go with your initial plan to get a drink first. The bartender is busy tending to the other customers so you have time to pick your concoction, rubbing your lips as you think hard over drinks.
After a while, the bartender finally comes to take your order and you haven't settled on a drink yet.
"I'd have uhm... a vodka soda," you settle on a drink.
"You only drink Cosmopolitan on a vacation, huh?" Someone says.
You turn on your feet to see that it's him, Han. He looks the same yet different at the same time, but you can't quite put a finger on what makes him different.
"You came!" He says with a bright smile.
"Like I wouldn't miss the chance to see you embarrass yourself on stage," you jokingly say, welcoming him for a hug.
He puts his arms around you and gives you a tight hug, along with a kiss on your cheek. He then slowly pulls away but keeps his hand resting on the small of your back.
"Your drink is here," he tells you.
"Thank you," you quickly mutter to the bartender.
As you take a sip of your drink, you notice that his hair is longer and somehow, it's making him cuter than he already is.
"Your hair," you point out.
He reaches for it and gives it a quick ruffle, "I permed it. Do you like it?"
It's endearing that he still asks for your opinion, you nod and say, "Yeah. I like it."
Then you have another look at him, paying attention to how he dressed tonight in blue jeans and a black shirt that loosely hangs on his broad shoulders, this ensemble with the permed hair gives him that edge. Also, reminds you of someone.
"Hate to tell you that you'll never be Asher," you joke to him.
"Ouch!" He gasps with his hand clutching his chest.
With his hand that still lingers on your back, he's pulling you to the side to avoid people passing by.
"I'll never be as cool as him," he meekly says.
You place your hand on his forearm and look at him, "And Asher will never be as cute as you," you say with a flirtatious eyebrow raise.
He drops his hand to catch yours in his and holds it, "Glad to know I'm still the cutest."
Cute guys are your weakness and Han with his gummy smile is going to send you to your death. Maybe you were right to overthinking it, maybe it's more than just an invitation to see him perform, maybe there's... something else.
"Two shots, please?" He orders to the bartender.
The bartender comes with the drinks right away, serving two shots on a small tray and slides it across the counter at Han.
"Double shots, huh?" You say as you notice his drinks.
"The other one is for you," he simply says, putting a glass into your hand.
"But I–I already have a drink," you stammer, quickly putting down your other drink on the counter.
"Oh, come on! You're not going to let me have a shot by myself," he grumbles, linking his arm around you by the elbow for a love shot.
You have no other option but to cave in, better get it over with before anyone in the bar notices what the two of you are doing.
"I hope you break a leg," you mutter as a toast.
"Figuratively," he adds with a grin.
Signaling each other through eyes, you both tilt your heads as you take the shots in one go and gasp from the bitter aftertaste almost at the same time.
"I needed that," Han says as he takes a sip of your drink to help wash it down.
Someone from the other side of the bar is calling for him and Han raises his hand to let him know that he heard him. He turns back at you and awkwardly smiles, "I have to go to do uh... soundcheck," he says.
"Yeah, you should go," you coyly say but you're reluctant to let his hand go.
He looks at you with glints in his eyes, reminding you of what the two of you had been and could have been if you stayed together after taking that vacation together.
"Uhm... I hope you endure the whole time I'm on that stage," he playfully says.
"Don't worry. I'll be booing loudly for you," you joke.
"I'll see you later, yeah?"
You nod with a smile on your face.
He pulls you close before finally letting go of your hand and turns away, heading toward the stage until he disappears behind the big curtain.
Knowing that the performance is about to start, the crowd moving toward the stage and leaving the stools around the counter unoccupied, you waste no time sitting on one.
"Am I late?" Someone says.
You thought you were hearing a stranger's conversation until you feel a hand on your shoulder and you turn your head to the side to see a familiar face.
"Oh, my God! Avery?" You gasp in surprise.
Avery's smile hasn't changed a bit, it's bright and warm, so welcoming. She doesn't hesitate to throw her arms around you and pulls you into an ecstatic hug.
Once you pull away from the hug, you immediately take a step back to take a good look at her and her appearance doesn't change much except that her hair is now in a shade of lighter blond.
"It's unfair that you're only getting more beautiful and here I am..." you sigh in sheer envy and a fake snide smile.
"No..." she hastily denies with her Australian accent and holds both of your hands in hers, "You look amazing!"
"Even if you're lying, I'd still believe you," you jokingly say.
"I'm being honest!" She assures you.
"Are you meeting someone in here or...?"
"Han didn't tell you I was coming? Oh, that guy," she sighs with an adorable pout.
For what other reason did she come here, unless it was coincidental, then it means Han invited her too. Your heart sank and you blame yourself for having your hopes up, there's nothing else here but a friendly gathering.
"How are you?" Avery asks.
"I'm great," you shortly reply, "What about you?"
You quickly put on a smile and answer all of her questions, asking the same thing back to catch up on things.
"Let's get you a drink, shall we?" you say since you also need a refill then you raise your hand to get the bartender's attention.
"Appletini, please?" She tells the bartender her drink order and then fixes her hair which is flowing down her back in soft waves.
Avery is effortlessly beautiful, the kind of girl who doesn't need to try hard to look that good, and the guy standing next to her who's been staring at her nonstop is proof of it.
"So where is the charming guy?" She asks, turning on her seat facing you.
You reckon what she means as the charming guy is Han and he'd be jumping in joy if he knew Avery called him a charming guy.
"He got called to the backstage. I think it's about to start any minute now," you answer.
Avery finally notices the guy who's been ogling at her and flashes him a smile, just enough to make him go berserk. She giggles in reaction and turns her attention back to you.
"Watches the reunion show and bummed to know that you guys broke up," Avery says.
A moment later, she suddenly grabs your elbow, "Please tell me that you guys played a prank on us and still secretly dating each other!"
You awkwardly chuckle and mindlessly stir your drink with your straw, "Trust me, if we were still dating, I wouldn't let him invite you tonight," you half-jokingly say.
Avery almost chokes on her drink hearing that, she gently wipes her mouth with a napkin and tries not to ruin her glossy lips. She opens her mouth to say something but someone checks the mic on the stage, causing a high-pitched feedback that echoes in the room.
Not long after the MC introduces the list of performers for tonight, Han finally enters the spotlight and slings his guitar strap around him, he says a few things to everyone in the room before starts playing his guitar.
Before this, you've only seen him performing through videos so that makes this the first time you watch him live and it's a whole different experience. You get to hear him sing, hear every strum of his guitar and if you ignore the other people in the room, you're also sharing this moment with him.
Another thing that makes it different is the subtle eye contact he's making at you and there is a chance that he may be looking at someone else, but delusional or not, you get that fluttering feeling.
It's the way he's immersed himself in his singing, the way he stands so nonchalantly yet oozing with charisma, the way he engages with everyone in the room, the way his hand grips the neck of the guitar that reminds you—
Before your mind wanders too far off, you take a big gulp of your drink and you wince at how the alcohol burns the back of your throat.
"Oh, my God! He's so cool," Avery says with her vivacious smile.
You almost forgot her presence and the fact that she's the girl Han initially crushed on, and probably still crushing on. It won't be a surprise if that's also the reason why he invited her.
"Yeah, he's cool," you say back and take another gulp of your drink.
You hate to hate Avery because she doesn't deserve the hate in the first place so you try not to let your negative thoughts get in the way of your friendship, especially over a boy.
In the last song, Han plays one of his songs that you know by heart. You sing along to his singing and notice that Avery is also doing the same, you put your arm around her to sing it out loud together against the loud crowd in the bar.
-
The crowd scatters around as they wait for the next performer while you stay where you are with Avery, waiting for Han with another round of drinks. As you laugh over Avery's joke, he finally appears in your line of sight, sucking on a bottle of water.
Avery turns around on her stool to see him and immediately jumps down to give him a hug, "That was incredible, Han!"
"Thank you!" Han awkwardly says, a little surprised by her hug.
You've been with Han long enough to know what the big grin on his face means and it means he doesn't mind any of that.
"And what do you think?" He asks you.
"That was really great!" You genuinely compliment him with a smile.
He brightly smiles and then brushes his damp hair to the back, exposing the sheen of sweat covering his forehead. You hurriedly take a napkin from the bartender's counter but Avery gets ahead of you.
All of sudden, Avery links her arm with Han then links her other arm with yours which forces you to get off your stool.
"You know what, guys? Drinks on me tonight," she says with a sly smile on her face.
"Are we celebrating something?" You curiously ask.
She looks at you with a pout, "I'm just so happy to see you guys," she simply answers.
You feel bad for asking and feel bad for letting her treat you when you should be the one treating her, you won the prize money after all.
"And I want to get you two drunk," she adds with a devilish laugh.
"That's a great idea! I'm in," Han agrees but he's looking at you as if he seeks your approval.
Eventually, the two team up and begin making puppy eyes at you, making it hard for you to say no to them. You don't like getting drunk, it's the queasy feeling, the headache, the getting home, and the hangover. However, there's always an exception and tonight is one of them.
You lowly sigh because you'll regret it tomorrow, then say, "I say let's get wasted."
-
Avery takes you to a different bar a few blocks away from the previous one and her friend already has a table reserved for all of you. Apparently, this bar is quite popular and that explains why it's so crowded, and you hate being in a crowded place like this.
Thankfully, the table is on the quieter side of the bar. You take your jacket off before sitting on the sofa that faces each other with an elegant-looking glass table in the middle and it seems like Han is about to sit next to you but Avery's friend claimed it first.
"I'm Lucky," he introduces himself to you right away.
"Oh, are you?" You teasingly say with a sly grin.
Lucky laughs and does it attractively with eyes full of crinkles, "Well, I met you so I guess I am," he teases you back.
The whole time, Avery leads the conversation and always tries to get you involved in it. Then it hits you why guys like her, not only she's beautiful, but she knows how to keep people engaged either with eye contact or a slight touch, and she just knows how to keep things fun for everyone, those are things that can't be taught, she was born with it.
"My friend here is cute, isn't she?" Avery asks her guy friend.
Lucky looks at you while you're sipping your drink and the ice cubes hit your lips. You force on a smile as you wipe your cold and wet lips.
"An absolute lush to be honest," he says with a seductive smile.
And you can say the same thing about Lucky, he's tall, with dirty blond hair and tattooed hands, and he also has those stunning light blue eyes. Maybe it's the alcohol that makes you feel like teasing him back.
"You're not so bad yourself," you jokingly say.
Avery laughs in amusement, enjoying the exchange between you and him. She refills everyone's glasses with more drinks while talking at the same time.
"The best part is she's single," Avery says.
Your eyes somehow dart to Han and you find his eyes are on you too, for a second, you both stare at each other until Lucky slowly leans in, getting Han out of your sight.
"Are you ready to mingle though?" He asks with a half-smirk that looks good on his angular face.
You prop a hand under your chin and pretend to think for a moment, then slowly turn your head his way to say, "Why don't you find out?"
The next thing you know, you're on the floor dancing with him and you don't even anxious about being in the crowd because you're busy enjoying yourself. However, constantly moving your body in not so much space gets you hot, you can feel a sheen of sweat forming on your back as you keep dancing.
"I need to go to the restroom," you whisper right into Lucky's ear as it is the only way he can hear you against the blaring music.
Following the sign, you push through the sea of people and head to the hallway that leads to the restroom. You take a moment to cool down, fixing your hair and tapping the back of your sweaty neck with cold water.
You take another look at yourself in the mirror before going out of the door. On the way back to the floor you catch Avery in the corner with someone, well, it doesn't make sense if anyone is not attracted to her until you identify that someone and it's Han.
They're standing facing each other and leaning in close whenever they talk, Avery laughs a few times while Han is continuously talking into her ear.
Knowing their history, it shouldn't surprise you that Han is probably still crushing on her. Again, Avery is undeniably attractive and you're just... you, so you understand that getting over his crush is not easy.
You shouldn't take this personally because he is not in a relationship with you. However, you've been getting this sinking feeling in your chest every time you see them together and it intensifies when you're watching them talking so close to each other.
Before either of them notices you, you make a turn to your booth and immediately collect your jacket and bag, you finish your glass of drink quickly and wince as it burns your throat.
"Hey, I've been looking for you," Lucky says.
You wipe your wet upper lip from drinking and force on a smile, "You know what, I just realized I have this... uh thing to do tonight," you made up something on the spot.
Lucky lets out an awkward chuckle, "All of a sudden?"
You put your jacket on first before answering, "Yeah, I... I have to go," you stammer.
"Like right now?" He asks with a perplexed expression.
"Yes," you hastily reply, grabbing the strap of your bag as you walk away.
You don't even know why you're in such a hurry that you forget your manner, you abruptly stop walking and turn around.
"It was nice meeting you, Lucky," you say with a smile.
You manage to not bump into Avery or Han on your way out, it's better that way. You plan on sending a text to Avery explaining your disappearance once you get on a taxi home.
You aggressively wave your hand to hail a taxi, wanting to get on one soon before any of them catch you leaving without saying anything.
Not long after, a taxi stops on the side of the road and you waste not another second to get into the backseat. As you're about to close the door, someone rushes in and sits next to you.
You roll your eyes once you realize who it is, "Why are you here?"
Han reclines on his seat and massages the bridge of his nose, "I think I'm drunk," he meekly answers.
First thing first, no drunk person is aware that they're drunk which means he's lying. You scoff as he keeps pretending to be drunk.
"Where to?" The taxi driver asks.
Since he's already inside the taxi, you can't force him to get off or even have the heart to push him out of the door so you decide to let it slide, then tell the driver where to go.
The whole taxi ride, you keep your arms crossed in front of you and look out of the window as the taxi glides through the city streets.
When you arrive, you hand the fare to the driver and get out of the taxi, all the while you're acting like Han isn't there. It doesn't take long for him to follow you out of the taxi and chase after you as you enter your apartment building.
"Why did you leave me?" He asks as he trails behind you.
"Obviously, you're not drunk and you can take care of yourself," you answer, starting to climb the stairs to get to the fourth floor.
"Why are you mad when you were the one leaving without telling me?" He asks again, also climbing the stairs two steps behind you.
"I have other things to do," you simply answer even though the other things you have to do are get home and sleep.
"You're lying," he says with a sigh.
"And you lied about being drunk too," you coyly say back.
That seems to shut him up for good but hearing the silence in reply makes you uneasy, you look over your shoulder to see him standing in the middle of the stairs looking up at you.
"I'm sorry I lied," he sincerely says.
That face... looking at that face makes you the slightest bit melting inside but you remain firm even though you're not sure with the reason why you're mad at him.
"Just go home," you tell him and continue walking up the last flight of stairs to your floor.
You start rummaging through your bag, searching for your keys inside as you walk to the door and are aware that Han is still following you.
"Can we talk?" He meekly asks.
"About what?"
"About everything," he answers.
"Well, I don't think we have the time to talk about everything," you detect the jingling sound of your keys and search for it with your hand without looking.
"About us?" He asks.
You let out a chuckle at that, "There's no 'us' to begin with."
After a minute of searching in the abyss that is your bag, you manage to successfully get it out and unlock the door to your apartment.
"Why are you like this?" He asks, his eyes wistfully looking at you.
To be honest, you have no idea either. You were so excited for tonight yet somehow, your mood significantly changed at the end of the night.
"All I wanted is to talk to you. Actually, that's what I've been trying to do the whole night."
You take your keys back and hold them, turning on your feet to face him, "If you wanted to talk to me, then why you brought someone else?"
This is your first mistake tonight, letting him know that you're upset about him inviting Avery. In your defense, you wouldn't be like this if he told you beforehand that his ultimate crush would be there too.
"So that's what this about? Avery?" He says with a sigh.
Han catches you clam up so there's no way of denying it, you turn the knob and push the door open, he stands in the doorway to keep you from closing it.
"I indeed invited her but it wasn't because I still like her or whatever it is you thought," he tells you.
You give him the chance to explain himself and stare at him, this way you can tell whether he's lying or telling the truth.
"And why is that?"
Han sighs, he then roughly brushes his permed hair, making it messier than before and you hate that he looks this good when you're mad at him.
"She was supposed to help me talk to you about something. But instead, she introduced you to this lucky guy," he says with a spiteful tone.
"Help you with what?" You curiously ask and urge him to answer by intensely glaring at him.
He bites his lower lip and sighs again, "Getting back together with you."
Everything you knew is far different from the reality of it and you almost let out a laugh at this newly acquired information. The whole thing is endearing yet annoying at the same time, you can't decide how to react to it
"Instead of doing that, she sets you up with Lucky," he cutely grumbles with his small mouth almost forming a pout.
"So you're jealous?" You coyly ask.
"Isn't it obvious?" He shortly answers with his mouth curling into a snarl.
He leans the side of his body against the doorway and looks at you, "So are you."
"What?" You defensively ask.
"You're jealous of Avery," he replies with a grin.
"No, I'm not," you deny with your foot slowly taking a step to the back.
"You lied again," he says with a pout.
"I'm not," you deny again while nervously chuckling.
Han boldly takes a step inside and closes the door behind him, he then stands with his back resting against the door just looking at you.
There's no one else in the room except you and him, it'd be less embarrassing to tell the truth. You swallow air and slowly exhale.
"Yeah, okay, I'm jealous," you finally admit.
A smile rises on his face and it grows wider as he comes closer. He only stops with a few inches of space between your bodies, then he leans in to softly whisper, "I know."
In reaction, you turn your head his way only to allow him to easily crash his lips against yours. He puts his arms around you as he deepens the kiss, a kiss that makes you dizzy and almost lose your footing.
You would be lying if you didn't miss his kiss, as a matter of fact, you do, you terribly do.
"Guess Lucky isn't that lucky tonight," he pulls away from the kiss only to say that with a shit-eating grin on his face.
As he's about to kiss you again, you dodge away and lightly chuckle.
"And you think you're lucky?" You teasingly ask, then gently push him away.
He hurriedly pulls you closer and tightens his hold around you, "I am."
You shake your head in disagreement, "I don't think so."
He hastily kisses your open mouth and then presses his mouth close to your ear, "You're about to get lucky too."
Without warning, he lifts you off the ground and steers your body toward the bedroom all the while both of your lips are locked in a rapturous kiss.
-
Han is too impatient. He doesn't even bother to take your dress off first, his hand goes under and pushes the hem up, making the dress hunches around your waist.
You let out a sharp gasp the second his hot mouth makes contact with your sex and out of reflex, your legs are clamping his head in between.
Thankfully, his arms are steadily keeping your legs open as his greedy mouth alternates between licking and sucking on your cunt, and a moment later, combining it with his two fingers pumping in and out of you.
It doesn't take long for him to sync those stimulations together to give you the utmost pleasure. If there's anything different about him from the last time you met him is how he's getting better at giving you head, he gets you squirming and moaning non-stop.
"Oh, my— Oh!" you loudly moan against the silence in the room.
Your hands are constantly crumpling the sheet underneath you with your back arched and your waist lifted off the bed.
Han abruptly stops and lifts his head to look at you, "What is it? I can't hear you with your legs around my head," he innocently asks with his mouth glistening wet with your essence.
"Just keep going," you breathlessly say, pushing his head down between your legs again.
He obeys your words, tirelessly pleasing you with his mouth and taking you closer and closer to your release while you're tugging at his hair harder as the pleasure intensifies in each passing second.
When you finally reach your high, you accidentally shut your legs together with his head caught in between. He slowly parts your legs open but keeps them around him, watching you riding down from your high while softly kissing your inner thighs.
After a while, he comes up and hovers above you. You eagerly pull him down, letting him lay himself on top of you. You can taste yourself on him as you kiss him, on his lips, his tongue, and around his mouth.
While your lips are busy lathering his, your hands are roughly pulling at his t-shirt, helplessly trying to get it off of him. He reluctantly lets go of the kiss to do that for you and you shift your focus on unbuckling his belt next.
It's your turn to be impatient, shoving your hand inside his boxer the second you successfully unzip his fly open. You palm his semi-hard cock and slowly stroking it in your hand.
"Gosh, I miss you so much," he breathlessly says.
You open your mouth to speak only for him to tug your lower lip between his teeth and playfully pull at it, making you forget what you're about to say to him.
As a way to get back to him, you surprise him by turning him over and straddling him, having him under you as you stare down at his face.
He's just as beautiful as the last time you saw him, your index finger touches the tiny mole on his fluffy cheek. His honey skin is still as warm as you remember, soft and searing to the touch. You swipe your thumb across his lips before leaning in to kiss him.
"Mmh... baby?" he hums against your lips with his hands cupping your ass and kneading on it.
"Yeah?" You breathlessly ask with your lips lingering on his.
"Help me take off your dress," he whispers.
You lowly chuckle and sit straddling him, taking the hem of your dress to take it off, pulling it over your head, then tossing it away.
The bewilderment is apparent on his face as he looks at your body with wide, lustful eyes and he slides his hands up the side of your body, eagerly waiting for you to take off your bra next.
"Mmh, yeah, get those tits out for me," he playfully says with a sly grin on his face.
His body is shaking along with yours as you laugh at his words while he enjoys touching you, running his knuckles down your front.
There's no denying that you miss his touch so much and how you crumble under the faintest of his touch on you, moreover, how it makes you want him more.
You land a long kiss on his lips and smile at him when you let go, "I'm going to get us a condom."
"Good idea!" He says along with a quick peck on your lips.
You get off him, rolling to the side of the bed, and pull open the drawer on the bedside table, rummaging through the contents to get a condom.
Han is kicking his jeans off the bed when you crawl back to his side while holding the condom in your hand, you put your leg over his as you get comfortable lying next to him.
He turns his head to be greeted by your gaze and tenderly puts his hand on your neck, he then leans in with his mouth open and slightly curling into a smile.
His hand brushes your hair to the side before resting his hand on your neck and instead of going straight for a kiss, he rubs his lips against yours and you can feel his breath on you, hot and raging with desire.
"Oh..." he lowly moans as you gently suck on his lower lip.
He flashes you a wicked grin before licking your lips then crashes them against yours again, slowly yet deeply. You are intimately making out with him as your hand goes down his front, not stopping until your hand meets his engorging member.
Using your index finger, you gently circle the tip of his cock and at times, alternate it with a few strokes on his full length, making it harder and hotter in your hand.
When you deem that both of you are hot and ready enough for it, you tear open the foil packet, then carefully take the rubber out.
You concentrate on putting it correctly, pinching the tip of the condom then slowly unroll the rubber down his length. He intently watches as you meticulously put it on for him and delightfully sighs once you're done.
"Wonderful work!" He playfully comments, pulling you close to him again, "You are welcomed to put it on me for the rest of my life."
You hold his chin and snidely laugh, "You wish!"
Unamused with your remark, he tightens his hold around you and uses his strength to flip you over to have you under him this time.
He plants his lips on you again and kisses you slower with his hand gently kneading on your breast, fingers circling on your hardening bud.
Your body is responsive to every stimulation he's doing to you, your legs are spreading open and you keep seeking that closeness.
The tension hits high as he settles himself between your legs, placing one hand on your thigh and the other aiming his cock at your entrance. He teases you by rubbing his cock on your clit, making you more drenched than you already are.
When he finally enters you, you let out a long moan at how hard and how good it feels to be slowly filled by him.
"I still have more, baby," he murmurs at you with a caress on your cheek.
Han props both hands on each side of you and looks down at you, he's using his hips to push the remaining length inside you while leisurely watching for your reaction, eyes fluttering shut overwhelmed with pleasure.
"Too good," his lips grazing yours as he speaks, "You always feel too good."
When you open your eyes, you can see one corner of his mouth curls into a cocky smirk and you so badly want to take it off his face so you pull him into a kiss.
He starts thrusting slowly, setting a steady pace as he continuously lathers his lips on yours, making you gasp for air in between kisses and moaning against his lips.
The sex feels different because it's not always about the sex itself but who you're doing it with. With Han, you're less insecure about yourself, you don't have to worry about your body and how it looks to him. With him, you can fully enjoy the intimacy between you and him, and also with yourself.
Noticing that you're getting close to your release, he hastily kisses you and says, "Cum together, yeah?"
Unable to answer verbally, you repeatedly nod at him in response.
He keeps the same pace but does it intensely as he's close to his release as well, your lips lingering against each other but both of your eyes are closed and he's groping around for your hand, holding it tightly as he fastens the pace.
When you finally come to your release, he keeps thrusting to ride out his high and then collapsing on top of you. With his eyes half shut, his hand dearly holds the side of your face and slowly puts his lips on you.
The kiss feels a lot gentler, almost like he's kissing a fragile object and you like that. You return his kiss even though you're still coming down from your high, panting in between kisses.
In the midst of it, you get hit by a realization and you immediately push him away, breaking the kiss. You let your head fall onto the pillow and lowly curse, "Fuck..."
"What's wrong?" He asks, slightly concerned.
You let out another groan and roughly brush your hair to the back, "I was planning to make you wait for, at least, a week for that."
He laughs in satisfaction and makes you put your hands around his shoulders again, "You can't help it because I'm cute," he confidently remarks.
You turn away and sigh, "You're not that cute."
Han places slobbering kisses on your neck and face in protest to that, making you laugh under him.
"This is exactly my plan to get you back," he tells you.
"And it's not working," you jokingly say.
He props his elbow against the mattress to not put his whole weight on you, "You have to admit that there's no reason for us to not get back together," he tells you.
It's true, you still have feelings for him and so is he, he wants you back as much as you want him back. You both want to get back together so what's holding you back?
He props his head with his hand and pulls the duvet to cover both of your bodies, "Honestly, I've been wondering why we broke up in the first place," he suddenly admits.
You look at him and see the turn of expression on his face, "We weren't ready," you answer.
"I was ready and I still am," he shortly denies, his eyes are open and wide, full of conviction.
You rest your hand on his neck and play with the hair on the nape of his neck, "It was me. I wasn't ready."
There's another change of expression on his face, his eyes downturn and looking sad, "Why?"
You awkwardly shrug and sigh, "I don't want to get hurt," you sadly admit.
His eyes wistfully look at you and his hand tenderly holds the side of your face, "I'm not going to hurt you, baby."
"I know," you respond.
"I like you too much to do that," he assures you with those eyes that shine for you.
The way he convinces you is endearing, you can't help but smile at his words. You don't even know why you think he's capable of hurting you when he's adorable like this.
"As a matter of fact, I love you," he blurts out.
Your heart aches in so many ways hearing those words from him, you smile and cup his cheek in your hand.
"And that's why I'm scared because I love you too," you say those words back to him with all of your heart and with worries that looming around it.
He softly kisses your lips and leans in so close his nose is poking at your cheek, "But we have each other remember?"
It's unfair how easily he can make you fall in love with him again, as easy as taking a breath but that's just the power he has over you, it's taking over you.
"You're right," you agree with him.
He triumphantly smiles and places a chaste kiss on your lips, long and lingering, making your heart ache than before as he holds it in his hand.
"We have each other," he murmurs once he pulls away from the kiss.
And you realize that you have his heart in your hand too so you smile and murmur the words back at him.
"We have each other."
-
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Text
29 / 2.1k / soap soulmate au, part 6
...
Ghost looks up as Soap storms out of the weapons closet.
"Still herself, I take it?" Ghost asks.
"She's a stubborn pain in the ass is what she is."
As expected. Soap misses the dry amusement that crinkles the corners of Ghost's eyes very slightly. "Didn't talk, then," Ghost says.
Soap scowls. "Not a goddamn word we can use. She won't listen to reason. Thinks she can face down an army. Dense, irritating--"
"Strong-willed," Ghost says.
"To a damn fault. Canny see what I'm trying to do for her. I'm-- she's--" Soap can hardly articulate his frustration. He's got this sick feeling in his stomach like he's been kicked in the gut hard enough to make him hurl.
It's not just you being too stubborn to give up the intel. What happens when you’re freed? You’re not going to stick around. What if Graves snaps his fingers and you go right on back to him?
Soap lets out a rough sigh. "There's more than Graves keeping her from talking. I don't like it."
"You've got a plan?" Ghost guesses.
Soap nods. "Aye. I need to talk to Laswell--"
"Done." Ghost produces a beige folder and drops it into Soap's hands. "Had her look into it for you."
"I'll be damned." Soap flips through the pages in the folder. "Christ. Bloody thin file." He fans the pages inside like a flipbook as if checking for extra pages. "Where's the rest of it?"
"Not much there to dig up."
"Then she's gotta be missin' some--" Something catches Soap's eye as he skims through, and he pauses, lingering on a photo.
Hell's fuckin' bells.
"Think that'll help?" Ghost asks.
"I'd wager so."
"Good. You goin' back in?"
"Aye.” Soap folds the file into his jacket and gives Ghost a good-natured fist bump to the arm. Then he brushes past him, knocking into his shoulder.
Ghost grabs Soap’s arm again before he slips past. "We don't have much time. Price wants to move on Alejandro. Says if you can't get the intel, we go in blind. Rodolfo leads."
Soap sets his jaw. "How long?"
"Three hours. Tops." He claps a firm hand on Soap's shoulder and turns to leave. "Get some sleep."
A moment later, the metal grate door slides open. You straighten back up and steel yourself again.
There's something different about the way Soap carries himself this time. He's not wound as tightly. But the way his eyes settle on you is... odd. The shift in his expression puts you on edge.
He sits down across from you. "We've not got much time. If talking gets us nowhere, we'll try something else."
You lean back, mirroring his posture. "You gonna torture me?”
“That what you’re expecting?”
“Maybe. You ever tortured someone before?"
"Aye. Can't say I care for it, but I know how if that's what this takes." He examines you again with that sharp gaze. You don't feel like he's undressing you with his eyes anymore. It's more like he's searching for something. "Why ask? You want me to put my hands on ya?"
You ignore the mental image that imprints. "I want you to waste your time."
Soap smirks. "What I wouldn't give to let you waste my time. You, me, all this animosity between us... I've got a few negotiation techniques I'd very much like to try." He leans back into the chair, his hands folded in his lap with an easy grin. "But you're no' the type to break under pressure."
"Better men than you have tried."
"Tried torturing you?" His grin tightens just slightly. "Anyone I know? Names, locations?"
Your cheeks heat up again. At that, for some reason. "I can take care of myself."
"I know you can."
He produces the thin file and tosses it onto the table between you.
You look down at the papers that slide out. They're grainy and covered in redactions as if printed and bound, pulled from the deep end of some filing cabinet, scanned, rescanned, and printed again. But you glimpse your name. Your real name--the one printed on Johnny's skin, too. Your chest twists and your stomach sinks.
Soap sees the change in you and leans forward, elbows wide. He opens the file and pushes it across the table. "I'll do anything to protect you, darlin'," he says. "But I need information."
The file is everything you don't want anyone to know. But what catches your eye is that photograph. "Who else has seen this?"
"Me and Laswell. Maybe Ghost if he was feelin' nosy. Does Graves know?"
You pull on your cuffs, wanting to reach for the pages and push them away. "Captain Graves said he'd make this disappear."
Soap leans back, broad palm sliding out to touch the edge of the pages, and his expression softens for a moment. "Some things you can’t make disappear."
You look at him, twisted up with pain and anger. "So, what, if I don't talk, you're threatening to expose all this? Is that it? It won't work," you add with false confidence. "Captain Graves knows everything."
"What I want to know," Soap says, voice quiet, "is what he did with it."
"What?"
Soap leans forward again. "Did he threaten you? Did he say he’d make this go away if you worked for him, hold it over your head?"
"No!” you snap. “After this happened, I couldn't-- I was discharged from the military. I couldn't find work. He reached out to me. Said he didn’t mind if I had… history. Then he offered to have it scrubbed if I wanted.” You stare down at the papers. “He never threatened me. He helped me."
Soap lets out a breath. He was prepared to deal with something a lot worse than that. Maybe he hoped for something worse. If Graves were blackmailing you, the solution would be easy. He'd give you protection, offer to have Laswell erase that file from existence instead, CIA-style. After all, if Graves got his claws into you and onto his payroll that way, why couldn't he? Probably got you dirt fucking cheap, too. Bastard.
Part of Soap wants to press that angle. He could tell you Graves never intended to deliver on his side of the deal. But the truth is that Graves would've had little control over this. Seeing the state of the file, Graves likely did what he could to have it redacted, sealed, destroyed--but someone over his head intervened. Shepherd, maybe. There'd be nothing Graves could do.
Soap wants you more than anything, but the pain in your eyes when you look at these documents tears him up inside. He can’t manipulate you that way. Even if he got you to himself in the end, he'd never forgive himself.
"That's... that's good. He protected you." Soap crosses his arms, squeezing his fist hard around the object inside, the one he pickpocketed off Ghost a few minutes ago. Much as he hates Graves, the man kept you safe. But that's his job now.
"I don't care who you tell," you snap, suddenly full of anger and spitting fire. The sight of those pages puts you on edge. You feel like a cornered animal. "I'm not telling you a goddamn thing. Do whatever you want to me. You're no better than--"
"Am no' blackmailin' ya." Soap's expression sours. So much venom in that mouth of yours. He runs his thumb over his tightened knuckles to suppress his own temper. He's amazed at how easy it is for you to get under his skin, how you push all these buttons when he's the one who's supposed to be pulling the strings.
But he realizes how this must seem. You act tough, but you're vulnerable, exposed, and he has every reason right now to drive the knife in and twist it hard. Maybe he should. Going into the Las Almas base blind means danger for his squadmates.
Christ, he’s tired. He pinches the bridge of his nose. "Darlin’, I... I know now you've done things you're not proud of. But that doesn't change anything. Not to me, not to Ghost-- hell, none of us would bat an eye. You don’t need to protect yourself anymore. I need you to talk to me. We're out of time."
He thinks this is about you protecting yourself? You shake your head. "If you’re storming the Las Almas base, you're going up against Shadows. You're asking me to help you kill my own."
"If that matters to you, then tell me how to get to Alejandro without alerting the guards. Nobody has to get hurt."
You scoff, looking away. "There's no way to do that and you know it."
"We don't have to shoot them if they stand down first."
"That's not going to happen. They'll shoot you on sight. It'll be a bloodbath."
"Not for us."
You close your eyes. "I know. That's what I'm worried about."
Soap lets out a frustrated breath. "We're going in whether you talk or not. The blood's on our hands. Not yours."
You keep your gaze angled away, clearly not believing that. "I don't see why you care about security. I don't see why you need intel at all. This is what you're good at, right? This is what 141 does. You break in doors, you kill people."
Soap grips the edge of the table. "The only thing gettin' you out of here is information. I don't care what it is or if it's useful. Price wants intel."
"I don't have it." Your voice is flat and cold. Whatever you can do to make him understand you're not worth the effort.
He leans in and grabs your chin, gently forcing you to look at him. "Then lie to me."
"What?" You stare at him, feeling pinned under that intense gaze. "Are you fucking insane?"
"Might be," A small, sly, half-smile curves his lips. "I'm also desperate, runnin' out of time, and at the end of my rope after starin' at you this long, knowin' I can't have you." He runs his thumb along your cheek. "Maybe I'm bankin' on you losin' your mind before I do."
You swallow. "You'll be waiting awhile."
He smirks. His thumb moves from your cheek to your chin, fingers trailing down the side of your neck. "Do you think you're a good liar?"
Before you can answer, someone bangs on the metal door, rattling it. Price's voice echoes in from outside.
"Get some sleep, Soap," he calls. "We're briefing soon. Give it a rest. We’ll press her for more intel after we’ve got Alejandro back.”
Soap tenses at the sound of Price's voice. "Wasn't planning on sleepin'," he calls back.
"Wasn't a question," Price calls back. You hear him walk away.
Soap withdraws his hand, letting out a soft curse.
"Why would you give your own Captain false information?" you hiss. "You could lose your job. You could get court-martialed. Even if it worked, what if Shepherd finds out? He's still in your chain of command."
"Guess that's a risk I gotta take."
"Then what if I tell you something that gets your teammates hurt, huh?"
"Won't happen. I'll be in the front when things get risky."
"Then how do you expect me to-- if it means you're the one who's--" You huff, words failing you. "You're so goddamn thick."
"Am I? Because here I am, tryin' to make plans and get a read on you, and all you wanna do is piss me off and run your mouth. I'm learnin' a lot." He tilts his head. "In fact, it's startin' to sound like you're worried about me."
"Absolutely not."
"Could always tell me the truth. Extra insurance if you do. Maybe it’ll keep me alive."
"You don't need it," you snap.
"I think I do." He leans in, crossing his legs and folding his arms. "Got a bad feeling about this one. No Shadow worth their salt wouldn’t send us straight to hell if it meant finishing the job. Especially Graves."
You feel another pang of dread in your gut. He's right.
He watches you for another long moment. Neither of you speak.
Finally, he stands, sighing deeply as he goes to the door. "Alright."
"Are you coming back?" The words spill out of your mouth before you can stop them.
He pauses in the doorway. Then he turns back, staring at you like there's something he wants to say. He looks down at the stolen object still clutched in his hand--the key to your cuffs.
He opens the door, slipping through without another word.
...
part 1 / part 2 / part 3 / part 4 / part 5 / [part 6] / part 7 / part 8
more Soap / masterlist tag
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felassan · 1 day
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Jeff Grubb said the following a few hours ago on his show, Jeff Grubb's Game Mess, "Perfect Dark and Summer Game Mess update":
"But, for Dragon Age: Dreadwolf, that, this is one that I've mentioned before, is coming out this year [2024]. And, hey, will it be at the Summer Game Fest or around that time? Yeah, they've said that themselves over at EA, so that's not some thing from me, that's them, but, I, that would be my expectation because, yeah, still sounds like that game is coming out later this year. So, where would they announce it other than Summer Game Fest? They could hold their own thing, but my expectation is they'll have - well, if they hold their own thing, I think it will be part of the Summer Game Fest orbit, so that's what I mean, like, Summer Game Fest or somewhere else. This point, it seems like we should see that game at Summer Game Fest, or around that time, and they should have all of the details for that thing, because, everyone seems really happy with that game. They're pretty pleased with how it turned out. And the plan is to launch that this calendar year, so not EA's Fiscal year, not before March 2025 or anything like that, this year, and I don't think you're gonna have to wait too long after this thing gets announced to play it. But we'll see. We'll see for sure here pretty soon. As it stands, I'm just gonna say, coming out this year. I have it on my Fantasy Critic draft, like, it's one of my games, because I'm pretty sure it's coming out this year."
[source, two. the second source link is the original video, with timestamp]
(bolded emphasis mine).
there were no further mentions of DA:D or BioWare in the video.
-----
SGF timings & events info:
June 7th 2024: Summer Game Fest 2024 opening live show. 2pm PT / 5pm ET / 9pm GMT. A 2 hour ‘what’s next in gaming’ showcase streaming live. I think Summer Game Fest 2024 itself runs from then til June 29th, with the majority of events happening by June 13th [?]. The Xbox Showcase and the PC game showcase are happening on June 9th. Also it’s rumored that in May 2024 PlayStation will be doing a showcase or state of play event. in the video linked above Jeff commented on the PS event as well, saying, "I still think the May [PS] showcase is happening, I think it's a showcase, still could be a State of Play or some event of some sort, but probably a showcase."
-----
edit/update: post has been tidied up and the word for word transcript added.
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nalyra-dreaming · 1 day
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I've seen the episode!!!
(Some comments and) SPOILERS!!!!
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Louis saying it was a betrayal and that he wants to be punished for it just when he finds happiness again via a hallucination of Lestat is so... ugh. Louis, honey, god. Also him imagining Lestat biting him - as a punishment, but he also wants it so badly, baring his neck, not trying to fight it, offering himself up there, he just wants the connection so badly. 😭 And god, Louis having Lestat call him out on his own denial. Damn. And Louis knowing he invited this Lestat as a distraction.
Also... that was definitely foreshadowing to how Louis will think the trial went.
And of course it would be a bat. Of course.™
Claudia driving them onwards, not giving one shit is just... incredible. Delainey is Claudia.
I was also right that she honed her senses and available gifts, more than Louis has his (which fits)
Daniel calling their plight the hunt for Moby Dick
Claudia is also... beautifully hopeful, and thereby almost desperately (intentionally) naive. She just wants to connect, so badly. To find more of their kind. And closes her eyes to what she sees. *deep sigh*
That "Adam and Even and God" comment was hilarious. Oh man, I cannot wait to see what the show will make of / with QotD and Memnoch etc.
Not only is Louis aware of forgotten memories now, he actively pursues them, and he has apparently read the missing pages before. And knows he has forgotten.
Claudia's diaries are unreliable, too (as predicted). Also, Louis correcting his own tale there, lol. Also: Armand‘s look and suggestion there.
Daniel and his little speech as to how he works… you go Daniel. “Here’s almost all the story“ lol
“Human affairs“
The revenants.... "the blood is bad here" *shivers* - I BET that's already setting up the "turning fails" arc with Amel, right there
God that old vampire connecting with Claudia, and then throwing herself into the fire in despair. God.
Morgan's arc was nicely condensed, the scene fittingly horrific
I live for Claudia speaking all the languages, but I noticed some of the subtitles were wrong
Whoever doubted DM happening... well. Sorry, but I AM seeing it. The looks, the smirks, the bitching.
Also "real Rashid" (lmao) - who, btw, does not wear a mask! What if the encounter with Eudoxia Marius had went differently and this is Rashid?
... someone wanting to buy a tryptich they haven't even put up for sale... *coughs* Marius? *coughs* (I mean, who else would know they have it? Or the Talamasca, maybe)
God that Dubai bedroom screams cage. And Armand controlling even the lights with his little iPad. Someone edit a blender into a screenshot of that scene.
The look Lestat gives Claudia at that last part of Louis' little speech. Devastating.
Also: the "I do I do I do I do I do"... Louis. Sweetie. I mean, I get it, but still.
Armand's comment that the boy from San Francisco is still in Daniel. Now if that is not foreshadowing.
A propos foreshadowing: Louis saying he will not choose the fire while Claudia walks the earth. *help*
"We cannot be the only good ones". Yeah... about that. -.-
Louis being so relieved that what Claudia wrote was not the truth
The. Score.
Louis pacifying Armand there with the little touches at the end. LOL (the whole setup makes me wonder if ARMAND has also forgotten some things btw). Also that little thank you kiss
The Groan. Once more seemingly when Armand is displeased, so it could be a metaphysical manifestation after all, especially since Louis seems to comment on it. (It could also be a red herring, we'll see.)
Daniel‘s “we‘ll get to you“ to Armand (lol)
Louis‘ guilty look to Lestat when he tries to pep talk Claudia 😭
EDIT: there were two very short flahback scenes with a comment to memory, which is setting up the big one later, no doubt about it, ugh
I legit teared up so often.
I have missed them all so much.
It's all I wanted, and more. Cannot wait to scream about it with everyone.
Also, last but not least: can I just say how glad I am our writers are playwrights.
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acotarxreader · 20 hours
Text
Jilted
Azriel x Reader
Synopsis: The morning of your wedding your fears are enforced by an old way of thought, sending you running and Azriel to cope with the aftermath but will a reunion set you both back on the path you should both be living?
Warnings: Angsty
A/N: Right, you may find yourself hating Reader for a bit but I tried my best convey the panic and pressure.
-------------------------------------------------------
“I can't do this I can't do this I can't do this”
“Shh YNN you'll be fine! This is what you want!” Mor caught you in her arms, your train half tangling your feet. You cried into her chest, not caring if your make-up was streaming down your face, your sister and maid of honour rocking you gently.
“YN, come on sweetie, it's just pre-wedding jitters, happens to most, Azriel will be waiting to see his beautiful bride!”
“Mor it's too soon! I was going to be a writer! Go off and live on the continent, I have never even been! There's still so much I want to go and do!”
“And you will! You will YN! You and Az will do that together and more! Marriage isn't going to change that!”
“You're right, you're right” You pulled from her, rubbed under your eyes and sat back down at the vanity. You looked into the mirror at the person you hardly recognised and silently went about reapplying your makeup.
“You look beautiful YN” You could only nod at her, afraid if you opened your mouth again it would set off a series of unfortunate events.
“I’m going to go check on Azriel” She gave you a smile before ducking out of the pastel room, leaving you alone. You steadied your breathing, batting your tears away with your lashes before they could fall further.  You loved Azriel, he was your life force, saved you from yourself and you returned the same to him. He was your everything. These thoughts brought ease to you. You ran a soft hairbrush through your flowing locks, a smile beginning to reappear on your face.
“Oh you look lovely my child” The sound of a weathered female's voice came up behind you, causing you to jump slightly. She was of pure Illyrian blood, a representative of a dying way of thought, a relic in her own right, Azriels only remaining relative he was in contact with.
“Thank you, Elena” You found your head bowing slightly to her, unsure of why, you out-ranked her and yet you felt the pressure of the millennia of the institution she represented weigh on you. 
“You're going to make a wonderful wife YN” She almost snaked up behind you as quietly as she entered the room as you watched her in the reflection. You tried not to stare at the clipped tattered wings that hung from the female, she tucked them in as if noticing your glance. 
“I just know you'll keep him a nice life”
“What do you mean?” You turned to face the skeletal woman, her bone-chilling words wrapping around your lungs.
“Well, I mean being the wife of a powerful Illyrian of course! And just think YN when the children come along you'll be so busy raising the next generation of warriors! Not much time for other things but what could be more important than the bloodline? Azriel is a hard worker, I know he'll provide in tenfolds” She smiled as if she wasn't throwing a live grenade, it began to smoke as the pin was pulled from it inside your head. You could feel your chest compressing further with the strangling tradition.
“Well, Az and I will be both working and you know we won't be having offspring until after we travel and even then we'll both be looking after them” You tried to calm yourself down but her shrill laughter put a quick stop to relief you had from your own words.
“Oh, my child don't we all think that! You're marrying an Illyrian, bastard born or not-” the words cut you, anger replacing anxiety for a moment until she continued “-He can’t suppress the urges of his blood. His life partner will be malleable, mute and well-behaved, does what is expected of her. Azriel has other things to be doing for his Court than raising children, female work” 
“I-” You couldn’t find the words through the magma-thick matter-of-fact speech she choked you with. 
“-Well, I must go make myself useful elsewhere child” Her crochet-hook-like fingers dug into your shoulders with a squeeze before she turned and left you in the solitude of your room once more. 
You could feel the air rush from your lungs as you fought to stop the oxygen from evaporating from your blood. You stood, pacing, blood rushing to your face as you stumbled on the train of your dress, hitting the carpet with unforgiving force. You lay for a moment on the carpet, hands splayed out in front of you, your engagement catching the light like you loved. It suddenly feeling much too tight. 
“Gods! Fuck! I can’t do this!” You stood on rattling knees, grabbing things frantically from the dresser before you could fully become cognisant of the actions.
You moved quickly and carefully through the door and into the empty hallway, avoiding the directions where laughs leaked out, them falling like battle cries in your ears. 
You reached the stone steps of the venue with quiet desperation, your adrenaline and anxiety now fully controlling your body as you bolted down the path, half stumbling. You whipped around to look back up to the hill where the hall of your friends and family waited for the blushing bride, tears claiming your face as their own as you dashed into the streets of Velaris before anyone inside became the wiser.
—----------
Funerals are a strange thing. They do strange things to people. You thought this as you stood at the back of a hall you had not been inside in almost 70 years, thought about how the female they were saying goodbye to today shook your entire life up like it was nothing. You looked around and imagined it the week after you left, the day you left, the hour after you left. You thought of the moments you missed with your chosen family since you fled the Night Court and all its wonderful attributes, you pushed the guilt you had been fighting ever since then back down
From the back row, your eyes landed on the backs of the three Archeron sisters, their stories meeting you on your travels around the globe. You smothered the smile that toyed at your mouth, the thoughts of your friends happy and in love warming you. Your gaze landed on the the back of Azriels head as it hung in respect. Too much, this was too much, you couldn’t deal with him seeing you. As you had 70 years previously, you slipped from the hall without anyone noticing. 
You were met with the warm Spring sun, a beautiful day in Velaris, as they all were. You wandered down the unforgiving steps, your name from a familiar voice stopping you.
“Yn?” 
“Mor!”
“Yn!” She ran down the steps, taking you in her arms, the feeling of home rushing to you. You were so happy to hold your sister having worked through the issues that arose from your wedding day. At first, she rightfully iced you entirely but after two decades of silence, she reached out, asking to reconnect, missing her sister in the fray and yet you always found an excuse to not come home. 
“Yn I'm so happy you're back! You came back for the funeral?”
“Yeah I did, felt I needed to”
“Yeah I mean I suppose they were almost your family too” she smiled before realising her words and apologising, a weak smile grew on your face in acceptance of the throwaway comment. The two of you continued down a winding road away from the groups leaking out of the hall.
“So how long are you here?”
“Just the weekend, I have meetings on Monday, I’m staying at our old apartment, remember?”
“Oh yes! Just a flying visit so, the busy life of a successful big-time author I suppose”
“Oh yeah, I'm plagued with the title” you laughed, finally meeting the Sidra as it coursed, its glimmering water making you smile.
“Yeah, your success really boomed after leaving here” She almost sounded sad before beaming at you again and catching your hands in hers.
“I guess, I missed you though, I missed the Night Court”
“And Azriel?” The name struck pure pain into your heart, as if seeing the back of his head in the hall wasn't bad enough, hearing his name was almost catastrophic, you only nodded.
“Well, he misses you too YN” She squeezed your hands.
“He doesn't, he couldn't, not after what I did to him Mor” She looked at you with sympathy, looking back up the street you just walked down. 
“I have to get back, they’ll be looking for me” You gave her an understanding smile 
“Meet me for a drink later in Rita’s, we have so much to catch up on” as she kissed your cheek goodbye with her words before returning back up the street to the hall again.
You looked out over the Sidra, an empty plot of land ripping through your heart. It was there where you and Azriel were going to build, it still stayed empty. A mausoleum to your relationship. You peeled your eyes from it, looking elsewhere around the city you adored, deciding to spend the remainder of your evening re-acquainting yourself with it. 
-
Night fell in the city of stars as you found your way towards the Town House by muscle memory alone. You felt so alive being back, more alive than any amount of travel or success ever brought you. You leaned against the fence, waiting happily for your sister.
“Y-Yn?” his face dropped, his voice alone causing you to bite the inside of your mouth to almost bleed. The red flush from your walking was gone from your face growing pale at the sight of him standing on the other side of the street. He crossed slowly as if any sudden movement would send you running.
“H-Hi Az-Azriel, you look - you look well” 
“Thank- what are you doing here YN?” tones of confused sadness left Azriel, the anger towards you he felt so many years ago unable to be conjured back at will. He thought about this moment so often and yet, he couldn’t think of a single thing he’d said in those imaginary encounters.
“I-I’m meeting Mor, I-”
“Azriel, hey there you are!” The small beaming brunette Fae seemingly came from nowhere to his side, her hand tucking into his so effortlessly. You pushed every yearning thought from your head and plastered a smile onto your face that didn’t fully meet your eyes. 
“Maya, go tell Mor her sister is here, I’ll meet you inside” She raked her eyes up your and down your full body with such subtle brutality before kissing Azriel’s cheek goodbye, sauntering up the path to the house. 
“She seems nic-”
“She is” He almost bit, his eyes felt like daggers on your skin.
“I-”
“-What are you doing here YN?” his tone matched his eyes.
“I just came for the funeral”
“And now what?”
“I’m meeting Mor and then heading to our old place to stay” “And then?” “Then, I’m heading back to the continent” You weren't sure why you were answering, you suppose you owed him that much, the heat of his eyes making you feel vulnerable.
“I heard your writing is doing pretty well there, pretty well everywhere”
“Yeah”
“Hope it was worth it YN” Words like fire burning you all over, and yet you felt you deserved worse. He sighed when you didn't respond before pushing past you, following the path Maya had just trotted up.
“It wasn't," you said the words before you knew what you were saying, back towards him before looking over your shoulder, now fully meeting his eyes. He looked as though he was going to say something but Mor came flying out her front door.
“Sorry I'm late YN I was- oh, sorry am I interrupting something?”
“No Mor, I was just leaving” and then he did. Gone again.  
“How did that go?” Mor looped her arm through yours, prying you from leaning on the wall to head down the street again.
“Fine” you tried a smile and failed.
“You met Maya”
“Always one for sensitivity Mor” You smiled at your sister and she was instant apologies.
“I’m sorry, I forgot they were coming over tonight… Maya isn't anything like you if that helps. He went a bit off the walls when you left. Cassian thinks he's going to propose to that tonight, hope he's all wrong. He's totally settling especially since Rhys and Cass have their mates now. She's nothing like you and I think he knows that, just ignoring it. It's kinda sad and- oh hey YN I didn't mean to make you cry” she said the words like throwaway gossip, forgetting her audience only to have your rising tears land her back to earth. 
“No no it's okay Mor, I'm just going to go home”
“Aw come on, I'm sorry!” you stopped on the path, her soft eyes giving you no comfort. 
“Not as sorry as I am Mor” You took off then, in the direction of your old shared house.
-
You lay in your bed, rain threatening to come through the slate roof. Tossing and turning you finally decided to get up and wander your old house you had with Mor before meeting Azriel. Looking in drawers filled with old pictures, ones of you when you were a kid, playing with the Mor. More recent ones of you with Rhys, Cassian and Azriel,  Azriels arm draped around you. You ran your fingers over the tarnished picture, a tear dripping onto the film before you tucked it back into the worn drawer. 
You meandered through the living room, stopping at the old mahogany press. You knew what was in there and you didn't want to see it. Looking at that engagement ring again would be the end of you.
A loud banging came drumming against the door causing you to jump from the crushing thought. You wrapped the dressing gown tighter around yourself before opening the door to see the tormented, rain-soaked Illyrian before you. He waited for no invitation before blowing in past you, the cold leaking from him.
“I COULDN'T DO IT!”
“Do what Azriel?! What's wrong?!”
“I couldn't ask Maya to marry me! There's fucking caution tape around my heart because of you! I would have been fine if you had just left me alone to wallow in anger all those years ago I would have been fine! But No! I just had to fuck around and get attached to you!” He threw his arms in the air, words hot with anger. 
“You're blaming me for loving you?!” You found his words caused you your own irritation.
“Yeah! Yeah I am! You just had to pay attention to me! You just had to care about me! You just had to-”
“Had to what?! Had to love you!” you couldn’t believe you snapped out the words as they floated to his ears. 
“YEAH! AND YOU JUST HAD TO LEAVE ME!” Knives to your mind would have been less painful, he almost rattled in anger, a mere metre away from you, his shadows vibrating at his feet in anger. 
“I had to leave Azriel I wasn't ready!”
“YOU COULDN'T HAVE SAID THAT TO MY FACE!? BECAUSE YOU COULD HAVE! ANYTHING WOULD HAVE BEEN BETTER THAN STANDING UP ON THAT FUCKING ALTER WAITING FOR YOU!” his arms raised in the air with his words, causing you to flinch slightly. 
“Azriel-”
“When we were together what was the thing you always said to me?! It was that you wouldn't leave me, that you wouldn't abandon me like everyone else. YOU SAID YOU WOULDN'T AND YOU FUCKING DID!”
“I know Az I know” you were crying now, throwing yourself back on the couch, floods of memories of those very conversations threatening to drown you.
“You know?! Then why did you do it! The truth!”
“Elena came to me before the wedding and said all this stuff about what a wife should do and be and how I wasn't going to have time to write anymore and all the kids would be left to me and I wasn't ready! I WASN'T READY FOR THAT KIND OF PRESSURE THE ILLYRIANS WERE PUSHING ON ME!”
“YEAH! THE ILLYRIANS NOT ME! I NEVER EVER SAID ANYTHING LIKE THAT! NEVER EVEN THOUGHT IT!” you buried your head in your hands at his shouting, the action sending a ping of regret through Azriel but the repressed rage he felt towards you had to get out.
“You hurt me YN YLN. The wedding bells were just alarms to you”
“I don't know what to say but I want you to know that I understand that you hate me, I'll leave tomorrow, Ill go!” you swept the tears from your face, feeling you didn’t deserve to have them, the maker behind this mess.
“I missed you” his words completely caught you off guard as you brought yourself to look at him once again, his wild wrathful eyes replaced by utterly heartbroken ones.
“I miss you and I shouldn't. I can't move on from you! I haven't slept properly since you left! Every damn night it's a new nightmare and then I wake up and you're not there like you used to be and it's a different kind of nightmare! I miss you being there next to me at the dinner table, at Rita’s, at stupid fucking court functions, just doing absolutely fuck all with you! The number of times I thought about contacting you, visiting you, the amount of letters I wrote and never sent-” It was the first time he hadn't had a raised voice since he came into the house but being faced with the fallout of your actions in his ice tone made you miss the screaming to some degree.
“I'M SORRY! I AM WHAT ELSE CAN I SAY!” you found yourself shouting back, anything to deafen your inner voice.
“Do you miss me?” his icy tone melted slightly at your unfamiliar raised voice.
“Yes” you stood again from the sofa. 
“I'm with Maya”
“I know”
“But she's not you”
“No”
“I hate you YN" The words hurt every inch of your body, every cell felt searing unwavering pain, the sentence you never thought you’d hear him say. The familiar feeling of your lungs being strangled beat in your chest, unable to recover from the mortal wound.  You did what you did best and ran, out the door and into the rain-soaked Velarian streets.
“YN stop!” he followed you quickly as you made it halfway down the street, he would not have you slip from him again.
“No! I hurt you! I broke you and myself in the process all for selfish reasons and I still love you Azriel!” you went to run again but his firm hand on your forearm stopped you, spinning you to face him as his wild face dripped in rain.
“I hate that I love you YN”
“What?” you said softly over the thundering rain. Azriel looked from your face to over your shoulder. You turned to follow his eyes down the street, the plot of land haunting the other side of the Sidra.
“You ever wonder what we could have been? We were supposed to live there after we got married, we'd probably have kids and all now” his tone had softened at the sight of the overgrown plot.
“Yeah, we probably would” You stood next to him looking at the patch of home, you gave a weak smile.
“But you might not have your successful career”
“I'd have you, that would be worth more”
“You don't mean that YN”
“I do” he turned to completely face you then.
“Never thought I'd hear you say those words” You bit your lip and you could have sworn Azriel fought a slight smile at your discomfort.
“You should go propose to Maya -” Your mouth was betraying your heart “- And I should leave and live the life I chose because I can't be around the life I should be living”
“Do you think you'd want to live it if I gave you the choice now?” his eyes searched yours, fully softening for the first time since he landed on the doorstep. 
“I do”
“Yn I hate you and I love you but mostly I just hate that I love you” He felt no longer in control of his urges, leaning into you as he took hold of your soaked hips and leaned down to kiss swirls of what should have been and what could have taking you both over.
15 years later.
You lay down in the sun of the wildflower garden, your eyes took rest in the warm glow of the sun, taking a moment of rest after months of traveling with your new novel. 
“ARGH!” You shrieked at the rush of cold water soaking you down to your skin. 
“Azriel!” you bolted from where you lay, chasing your husband who clutched the hose down the length of the garden, only to be stopped dead by his sudden decrease in velocity. 
“Big mistake YNN” You looked at him puzzled only to hear the roaring laughter of your two children launch out of the hedges and armed with water balloons that they doused you with, gaining more screams of pure unadulterated joy. You collapsed to the grass as they overwhelmed you with their hysterics, climbing all over you, Azriel watching on so lovingly, so whole.
----------------------------------------------------------------------
I promise the next fic will be more silly goofy! Let me know what you think!
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hasellia · 2 days
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Jax didn't change. At all. He is still the same arsehole from the first time we saw him.
From what I remember; he was dismissive of Ragatha, manipulated an emotionally vulnerable Kinger, pushed Gangle to her potential death and didn't give two fucks that Kaufmo died of dismay. All in episode 1
What changed, is that the audience saw what happens we Jax doesn't get his way.
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Jax doesn't just seem "disappointed" here. He seems seething, like a child, and we get a good wide close up of his face just to make it's clear he's absolutely not happy in any way.
Episode 2 seems to be setting up how different people react to being in a seemingly inescapable scenario, a la time loop nihilism.
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You have Pomni and Ragatha who try to reach out to others, trying to build a supportive collective. There's Kinger and Gangle, who are stuck in survival mode and need that support assistance. Not everyone is in the mental position to help out as they want to be. With enough time and reassurance, Gangle may be able to break out of her insecurities. Kinger... I'm saying this as someone who relates to Kinger the most out of the cast: I think my king is stuck with his chronic anxiety and neurodivergencies. Someone give him a Lexam and Intuitive. So with Jax...
Jax is playing a video game. To him, this is just Undertale with multiplayer and he wants to see what happens on the genocide route. He's so under stimulated for meaning that he wants to fuck around and find out. If you want to find out what happens in a boring co-op game, what's funnier? Jumping into the enemy pit yourself, or getting your buddy to jump in instead. He may not even see the main cast as other players. What separates Gumigoo from Ragatha? The princess? The goop monsters? ... Kaufmo? Jax just might have lost his sense of humanity in everything but himself. Cogito ergo sum. I think Jax is meant to be a criticism of people who unironically think everyone is varying degrees of those NPC roleplay videos.
So yeah, I never saw Jax as Bugs Bunny. He was always a toxic League of Legends player stuck in VR coop game to me. We're just thankfully spared of his gamer words. Maybe when we see more of Zooble, we'll see someone stand up to him. No promises.
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crimeronan · 2 days
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i've been totally fucked up and sleeping all day but we've got plans to go out and see if we can see the aurora and it's got me perking up like a puppy regardless. sky? sky?? sky? sky? sky? sky????
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copperbadge · 13 hours
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I went to the library this afternoon, intending to get a study room and do some work on the novel, but I got distracted and ended up spending the two hours working on a short story instead.
Georgie has said that Michaelis hired her after she rescued his friend's child from a kidnapping, and it was suggested to me recently that the friend could be Oliver McAllister, Michaelis's old school mate from Pirates of the Riviera. I was skeptical because the timing didn't quite work out, but I couldn't stop thinking about the idea, so I decided to try making it work.
And let me tell you, these messy bitches.
In 2015, Michaelis is deep in his Kingbot 3000 phase so he doesn't have to Have Feelings, and Gregory has coerced him into taking a vacation by threatening a coup. Meanwhile, Olly is fresh from his second divorce, from a woman who just tried to kidnap their child. Georgie is the most together person in the room and she's an unemployed twentysomething who just beat three men unconscious to prevent said kidnapping.
And the most amusing part to me is that because of how I set it up, Michaelis is just trying to be friendly but inadvertently keeps coming across like he's trying to seduce Georgie. Which also makes Georgie joking about trying to marry him for his money in Royals/Ramblers even funnier.
"Ma'am, the police would like to take a statement," Lael said to Georgie.
"I can have Lael find you a lawyer if you want," Michaelis added. She gave him a sardonic look. 
"All right, let's get it over with," she sighed. "There goes my visit to the Musee D'Orsay."
"We'll give you the room. Olly, why don't you go in with your boy, so the police can speak with you if needed. Lael and I will be at the cafe next door when you've finished."
Georgie nodded, but he stopped as he passed her and put a hand on her arm.
"Come see us when you're done," he said quietly, ducking his head so the police at the doorway couldn't see their faces. "And cancel your job interview in London."
"Excuse me?" she asked.
"Stay in Paris. You can see the museum this weekend. The palace will cover your lodging and food."
"I...don't want to offend," she said slowly, "but I'm not -- " 
"I'm not flirting with you," he said, realizing belatedly how it might seem to her, and taking his hand from her arm. She looked faintly relieved. "I'm going to spend the time you're giving a statement assembling a job offer for you with my security office. Any young woman who can spot a kidnapping before it happens and soundly beat three grown men should not be leaving Askazer-Shivadlakia to do a job she hates in London. Now, regardless of that, and I say this as a concerned friend, not as king or employer: be honest and helpful with the police, but...economical."
"Just the facts?" she asked. 
"Exactly." He gave her an approving nod and followed Lael out. They were silent in the hallway and lobby, until they stepped out into the street and Lael exhaled.
"That was impressive," he said. "Young lady has a great right hook."
"She's certainly very alert," Michaelis agreed.
"It's been a long time since I've seen someone throw a punch like that."
"Say it and you're fired," Michaelis said good-naturedly. He'd known Lael since the head of security had been a young palace aide during Michaelis's first days as king -- if still years older than the king himself -- and he knew what was coming. 
"Not since our last trip to Galia," Lael said, voice full of relish. "That time a young hothead punched Duke Tomas in the face."
"Utterly fired. I've found your replacement. I'm putting you out to pasture with no pension." 
"You think she'd make a good successor to me?" Lael asked. He was joking but, simultaneously, he was not -- they were both getting older, and Lael was as aware as Michaelis that when a new king was elected in a few years, whoever it was, they would need someone younger, someone who could more easily keep up with them. 
"You tell me," Michaelis said. "You're the expert." 
"Oh, I've been fired, clearly my opinion isn't wanted," Lael said, as they settled into a table at the cafe, Lael with his back to the wall, eyes always scanning behind Michaelis. There had never, at least as far as Michaelis knew, been an attempt on his life, but he'd become used to never getting direct eye contact in public from the man whose job it was, after all, to watch his back. 
"Fine, I withdraw your firing. I suspect purely on her ability to sass me, she is your equal if not your better," he added, as the waitress approached. He ordered coffee and pastries briskly, then turned back to Lael. 
"Well, it's difficult to tell on two minutes' acquaintance," Lael replied, "but actions do speak louder than words." 
"Agreed. Perhaps a contingent offer? She has a law degree; she could likely earn more than we could offer her for a job like yours, but I think she's looking for the right job, not the right pay. Say three months of probation with guaranteed six months of pay to ensure she takes it, and a firm permanent offer at the end if you approve? Conditions non-negotiable but a bit of wiggle room in the salary, I think." 
Lael considered it, then nodded. "I suppose it's paranoia to imagine she might have arranged all this to get into the Palace employ."
"As what, a spy? I love a thriller novel, Lael, but they are fiction," Michaelis replied, amused.
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eqt-95 · 22 hours
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there were too many beds
prompt came from this reverse trope list. (thanks anon for suggesting it be pulled into a standalone post)
- - - - -
There were too many beds.
There were too many beds.
Kara scanned the room: two, four, six, seven beds.
Sevens of them. All done up with pillows and over-starched fabric and tiny brochures translated into broken English with a map of local attractions splattered from inch to inch.
When she'd persuaded Lena to live out her dream of a four-week backpacking European holiday, she never expected there to be so many beds. Hostel after hostel with 'private' rooms filled with beds. It was perfectly roomy which was exactly the problem. Kara had daydreamed of a closet-sized room tightly packed with a single double bed, a tiny nightstand and, maybe if they were lucky, a private bathroom.
What she didn't expect was Lena plans-ahead Luthor booking out an entire 'group' of beds at each location.
"It'll give us guaranteed privacy," Lena explained when Kara flushed at the bundle of euros being slipped across the counter city after city.
Because that was the other thing: Kara had just come out. As Supergirl. And for as much as she liked to pretend everything was normal, everything was not normal. They could barely enjoy their plates of cicchetti in Venice without being barraged with onlookers. Their walk through Gaudi's masterpiece was ruined by slack-jawed observers gawking at Kara in civilian clothes. And now, in the city of love itself, Kara's romantic plans of a blanketed dinner in front of the Eiffel Tower was ruined by one nosy teenager with a social media following.
And now they were back, dinner ruined, a half-eaten baguette in one hand and the remaining drags of a perfectly delicious bottom-shelf bottle of red in the other. It was terrible. It was awful. It was not going at all like Kara wanted or planned or hoped.
Still Lena smiled. She knowingly leaned into Kara with each spontaneous combustion of crowds. She squeezed a hand reassuringly and chuckled when the wildest requests were made for autographs and signatures and "can we see the suit?". Tiny reminders of "it's ok, darling," were whispered through a crowd while an adoring smile settled Kara's stewing frustration.
"Everything ok?" Lena asked, one hand disappeared into her overflowing backpack.
"Hm? Oh, yea," Kara replied. A blush crept over her cheeks and a distracted hand scratched at her neck. "Just tired I guess."
"It'll pass. Soon you'll be able to walk down the street and be a nobody just like me," Lena offered with a sympathetic smile. And then there it was; there it came: a quick squeeze of Kara's forearm followed by the light trace of a kiss on Kara's cheek. "Thank you for an amazing day."
And then it was gone as quick as it came with the bathroom door squeaking shut.
And still, there were seven beds.
Seven.
Beds.
Now, what happened next is up for some debate. To the desk clerk, it might have sounded like a robbery. To Lena Luthor, one threshold away, it sounded like Kara was having one of her early-aughts inspired dance sessions. Kara herself would explain she'd seen a black widow. An army of black widows when an amused Lena pressed.
"Not bedbugs?" Lena asked, surveying the damage and stepping over a smoking mattress.
"Uh... coulda-coulda been?" Kara said, flushed and dry-mouthed.
"Mhm, well then we couldn't possibly sleep here tonight-"
"Black widows. It was definitely a fleet of black widows. Not a bedbug in sight actually-"
"A fleet?" Lena pressed, barely containing a grin and dropping her day clothes onto her completely unscathed, pristine backpack.
Kara nodded. She nodded with vigor and superspeed.
"I see," Lena continued, plopping onto the mattress.
How exactly it happened didn't really matter. All that mattered was that, in the span of time it took Lena to brush her teeth and change into soft sweats and Kara's old NCU t-shirt, six beds had been destroyed.
"I guess we'll just have to share, won't we, darling?"
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whateversawesome · 15 hours
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Spy x Family Chapter 98: An Explosion
Let's start with the most important thing and we'll go from there. Ready? This panel:
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Blink and you'll miss that insignificant comment from someone we don't even know their name. Nevertheless, given the implications of Project Apple, this panel is huge! Because, even if back then it was just a rumor, there's a chance it could also be true. Project Apple could have started during the first conflict. This leads me to the following theory:
Anya's biological parents were prisoners of war.
The story about Twilight as a soldier, Martha and Henry, as well as Millie, Franky, and even the Lady Patriots Society tell us about the dehumanization of the enemy. So yeah, it's very possible that it was acceptable for either side to do anything they wanted with captured enemies, that includes experimentation.
And by prisoners of war, I'm not only referring to soldiers and medical personnel, but also spies. Wouldn't it be funny if Anya's birth parents were also spies? It's too soon to tell, but it's so much fun to speculate 😆
At the beginning, it's stated that Anya was created by accident:
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Maybe she was "an accident" between two prisoners of war or between a prisoner of war being experimented on and a scientist 🤔
So here's another crazy idea: Everyone thinks that Anya learned Classical Language because it was used in the lab by scientists, but what if it was her biological parents the ones who taught her that language in order to be able to communicate with each other?
At some point, I thought that even if we learned about Anya's past there was a possibility we would never know about her parents, now I think we will.
About the Chapter
Clearly, SXF is an anti-war story that wants to show us how terrible war is for EVERYONE. That's why big and small characters, side or main, have been affected greatly by war.
I'm sure plenty of people will talk about Martha and Henry's love story. After this chapter, I think it's clear that they probably were separated by war and that Henry had to marry to save himself, leaving Martha up in the air. (I know I am a fool, but I keep hoping she's the one he married, but I don't think so 😭)
Anyways, leaving the cautionary semi-tragic love story aside (Ahem, watch out Twilight and Yor)...I see what the author is trying to do: The story shows us very clearly what happens to every person when pushed to their limits, when they and their families are in danger. It's a story about loss, loss, and more loss.
The story is trying to make the readers root for peace and be very adamant against war. This is a masterclass on "Show, don't tell." So even if a lot of these stories seem insignificant because it's about side characters, they are meant to influence the readers' point of view about war, so when it reaches the main characters, we all know what could happen to them. These stories are meant to raise the stakes for the main characters.
Now, I've said it before: It's very possible that close to the climax of the story, Ostania and Westalis will be at the verge of a third conflict. By then, we'll know much more about the main characters' background as well as many other stories of side characters affected by war (don't be surprised if The Garden was created as a consequence of it). So when we're close to the end, when war is about to happen, we'll know exactly what could happen to the Forgers, because it has already happened to so many people: loss.
Something to Keep in Mind
The more the story moves forward, the more curious I am about the Desmonds. Since all of the characters were affected by war, I'm wondering how were the Desmond affected? Melinda certainly has issues (did this happen during and because of the war?) and Donovan Desmond is still a BIG question mark. It easy to relate to what normal characters feel. If any of us were going through something similar, we would be terrified too. However, how is it for someone in charge? How did Desmond see and suffer war? I really want to know.
One Last Thing
If in two chapters focusing on two side characters Endo has managed to create such a beautiful love story, can you image what he plans to do with Twiyor, which is the main couple of the story??
I know I say this a lot, but after seeing this my expectations are high and I am convinced it'll be worth the wait.
Food for thought.
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22drunkb · 2 days
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Do you think he was ever in love with Bedelia like he was in love with Will? I ask this because Bedelia says they were both the "brides of Hannibal". But Hannibal never courted her like he did with Will, Bedelia came into Hannibal's life much before Will but he never pursued her like he did with Will. Mads said he wanted a future with Will unlike with other people he hooked up with Alana, Bedelia or Anthony. He took her to Italy as a consolation prize when Will betrayed him. Even in Italy H was pining about Will all the time and telling Bedelia how much he loves Will. I know he slept with Bedelia but he probably slept with Anthony too and he slept with Alana, Hannibal is a hedonistic guy who sleeps around. For him sleeping with someone doesn't mean he is in love with them. But when Will confronts Bedelia, she pretends as if Hannibal held them in the same regard which is obviously not true. Hannibal would choose Will over her in a heart beat and even she knows it but yet she acts as if Hannibal sees them both equally. I don't understand why? 😭 Why do you think?why make herself seem like a competition when she is not?
I think you're misunderstanding the meaning of "bride" here. It doesn't mean beloved. It doesn't mean favorite. It doesn't necessarily mean sex. It means something more like what Chiyoh meant when she called Bedelia "his bird": "He puts us [birds] in cages to see what we'll do."
Hannibal collects people, generally. Most of his therapy patients are collectibles. He collects them because he sees potential in them for "becoming," for expressing an inner potential that interests him and that he thinks, in his own way, it would be good and true to themselves for them to express. (This generally amounts to some kind of murdering or violence.) He may be interested to see what will happen when his collectibles are transformed, but he doesn't find it terribly hard to imagine or predict. The people he has sex with don't even all fall into this category; I don't think he particularly was interested in Alana's potential becoming, for instance, though things did work out that way (but, in some ways, more at Will's hand than at Hannibal's).
That said, the category of "collectible" is large and includes both Will and Bedelia. However, there's another category, a subset, within that, which Will, Bedelia, Chiyoh, and Abigail occupy: that's "bird." These are people whose behavior is less predictable and therefore more interesting and engrossing. In the process of transforming his collectibles-in-general, he doesn't necessarily show these objects of interest much about himself. His true self, that is, rather than the mask. The four I just named get more of a look. However, Chiyoh and Abigail get their views not entirely at Hannibal's choosing: Chiyoh is from his past, and Abigail figured a fair amount out herself. (It's more complicated than this, but for that reason I don't think it's helpful to get into these two further here.) There are, as far as we know, only two people who've gained much insight into him entirely of his own volition: Bedelia and Will.
Both Will and Bedelia are people Hannibal collected and then cultivated in order to have someone to share himself with. I am not saying that that meant he felt exactly the same way about them, or that he shared the same things or to the same degree. But Hannibal put his therapist in a position to murder not only because he saw that potential in her and wanted to bring it out, as with all collectibles, but also to gain a certain degree of control over her so he'd have a therapist he could actually talk to. It's hinted in their pre-Florence sessions that she does not want to continue being his therapist but feels she has little choice.
Hannibal saw that collectible potential in Will and, like Bedelia, wanted him to be someone he could show himself to, albeit in different ways and to a more profound degree. Less utilitarian and more romantic. He made it very clear in the s2 finale that he wanted that more than anything: "I let you see me, know me. I gave you a rare gift. But you didn't want it." (Or something like that, I'm paraphrasing from memory.)
What is necessary for him to select these two people to be seen by is for him to respect them, in his own way. He does not respect all his collectibles, though he's interested in them. He respects Chiyoh and Abigail more, but in a "precocious child" kind of way, rather than anything peerlike. But, Bedelia: he does actually listen to what Bedelia says. He forces her to let him play patient to some degree, but, within the role of patient, he squirms at some of her insights and defends himself the way a patient who feels that their therapist has power does. He values her input enough to subject himself to it. He enjoys her company enough to take her to Florence. She can't "surprise" him the way Will can, and he's not enamored and fascinated with her the same way. But he does hold respect for her. If we were to view what I said about the patient dynamic he has with her as a BDSM thing (which....it is), he chose her to play the dom, which is a pretty big deal, really.
I don't disagree with you that his interest in Will is qualitatively different. But they have both, at different times, been someone he chose to know him. That's a special status. It is also a status of being kept, to some degree: Bedelia didn't have the option not to be his therapist, and, as Will feels once he gets sucked back in after his time with Molly, he never really had the option to escape either. Birds again.
In the "We've both been his bride" conversation, it's Will who comes in with an aggressive, competitive energy, not Bedelia. He calls her "bride" first, and she responds by saying that Will has been too--i.e., why are you so mad at me? Why are you displacing your feelings here? (That is, she's being a therapist.) Through the whole conversation, Bedelia is actually trying to get Will to see that they aren't the same, and that Hannibal cares for him and belongs to him in a way he didn't to Bedelia. It's just that to get Will there, she first has to get him to admit that he has been attached to/chosen by Hannibal at least as much as she has, before she can show him that his position goes further. She's not setting herself up as a rival at all. Will came in angry because he subconsciously saw her that way, and she is working with that starting point to get him to understand better. This is the conversation that leads Will to ask, "Is Hannibal in love with me?", which he never could have brought himself to consciously articulate without her guidance.
I wrote a whole post just about this conversation, if you'd like further explanation. See also this and this from @bonearenaofmyskull.
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remidyal · 21 hours
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So I'm going to start speculating a little about future D20 seasons, just because we're running out of JY and thinking about that makes me sad.
My guess is that we're getting another four side quests, plus the replays of the Time Quangle live shows, before whenever the next IH season is (probably jan or feb 2025). From Dropout's production schedule, most likely at least two, probably three, and maybe all four are either already filmed or filming presently. The strikes may have disrupted this somewhat, however.
We know the names of two from the 5th anniversary video; we also know from the JY FAQ for a fact that one of these two, called "Never Stop Blowing Up" is next.
In the last few years this has been the slot for a campaign not GMed by Brennan or Aabria; I'm going to actually guess that there's a decent chance Brennan also won't be a player though I'm not at all sure of the timing with paternity leave and all. What the season is from that title could be a lot of things, though social media stars or stuntpeople have been guesses I've enjoyed. I think this is going to be a new setting, rather than something set in a preexisting universe, but I could be wrong there and there's been speculation that it might be something Starstruck (in which case I WOULD expect Brennan at the table).
GM possibilities for this or any other season even just from among people who have played on D20 before are too widespread to even do a complete list; highlights who have played on but haven't GMed for D20 and who I understand have experience (and would be excited to see) include but certainly aren't limited to Jasper, Ify, and Anjali from various side quests. Among the IH, Siobhan has made it fairly clear that she's not interested in GMing. I don't know if Ally has experience or not but they would obviously run something wild and I'd be here for it. Lou I believe has DMed home games but not actual plays; I'm uncertain if he'd be interested in running for a show, but I'd certainly watch if he did. Emily and especially Murph have a ton of experience as well but I think NADDPOD is kind of too much for Murph at least to GM outside that. Zac is low-key the IH I think is the most likely to end up GMing a season; rotating heroes is a thing, of course, but I don't think the workload there is as high as NADDPOD's.
We also know a Dungeons and Drag Queens 2 is coming at some point. The most likely format for this is a straightforward sequel with Brennan GMing for either the same four players or four different Queens, but I would actually love to see one of the players from the prior run step into the GM seat if any of them have gotten deeply into the hobby in the meantime. If they swap Brennan out for another DM here, this would maybe be the one season where I'd be delighted for it to be Murph, simply for the makeup possibilities. (One possibility is simply that he wears Cody Walsh cosplay for the season.)
I also think (or maybe I'm just trying to speak into existence) that we will get another 10-episode Aabria-GMed season this year, probably as the lead-in right before the next IH season for the third time running. Burrow's End and ACoFaF are both out of this world, stellar seasons to me (MiMa is... complicated by how much I want the property it's mocking to fade from memory, but that isn't its fault or hers) and I want to see what she does next.
Last, probably between D&DQ2 and that 10-episode season if that happens, we'll probably have another 4-6 episode original. If Brennan DMs D&DQ2 and Never Stop Blowing Up, this will probably be someone else; otherwise, not much to go off of.
It's possible that the live shows end up filling in one of these slots and are treated as a season until themselves, but I think they're going to be released not all in a row but rather to fill weeks between seasons. This might just be a greedy hope on my part, though! I do hope Brennan sits out at least one season, and I'd love it if the person who GMs who isn't Aabria or Brennan is someone who's done less prominent projects. (I'm actually talking myself into really rooting for a Zac-GMed season, though Ify's been my main hope for a long while.)
One thing that does seem to have shifted lately, specifically in Dropout's marketing - in the past, they were always extremely secretive about seasons past the currently airing one until it was complete, with the names not even known until the release of the season trailers. This changed a little when they teased Matt Mercer gming a season (which turned out to be RavWar) during Never After's airing; it's changed much more in the last two seasons, with a teaser for Junior Year coming out before Burrow's End had even started airing and with the names of multiple seasons being given in advance. It wouldn't surprise me if we continue getting little seeds for future seasons as we move forward.
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utilitycaster · 1 day
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@disastergenius replied to your post “perhaps unpopular but while I do agree the EXU...”:
re: this party doesn't talk much; i think that narratively, fcg's death isn't the call for them to talk in the way that molly's was? Molly's death happened early and bc of molly, but it was the wake-up call the party needed while separated and to actually begin to work together. bh's have different problems and fcg's death wasn't a result of party but was fcg's decision. so it also makes sense that it's not bringing the group together or anything, it's just mourning
​So I think this is part of it but I also wanted to post this as a full response because I've been thinking a lot about this! In short...having experienced a death within a friend group, people respond in weird ways, and for the most part, with the caveat that this was a friend among my friends from college and she died when we were all adults in various different cities and therefore not necessarily closely in touch all the time, we did not have a big sit-down and go around talking about our feelings. It's much slower. And I've talked a lot with people who have experienced a death within a friend group that was closer. Sometimes the group falls apart dramatically. Sometimes it just drifts apart. Sometimes it's sort of a weird blank space no one knows how to deal with.
I found Ashton's behavior in particular to be really well done on Taliesin's part and deeply affecting. They're exhausted not just mechanically but emotionally, and they don't want to really talk to anyone, but they do very much want some kind of comfort that doesn't require a lot of effort and most importantly, they don't want to be alone. When I had to learn about the (Jewish) religious practices surrounding grief and mourning, one of the things they tell you about sitting shiva (and to be clear this is not unique to shiva, it's just that Judaism has very clear time delineations of the mourning process) is that sometimes you just go there and sit with someone who doesn't want to talk much. His reaction felt incredibly real and natural, is what I'm saying. Grief can be isolating and tiring and difficult to talk about.
It feels right for the others too. Like...we can talk about the rapid pacing but that's been the case for much of the campaign, and no, I didn't like the EXU decision but what's done is done. I think deciding to, as Chetney said in 92, "make it count" seems very natural. I do hope there are conversations in Zadash and/or Aeor but at this point "we're drunk and tired and aren't ready to really feel this", especially since in-world, everything might be over in a week or so, makes a lot of sense. I also think FCG's death has united the party at least in the sense of purpose, and I think some people just dislike that the purpose is "double down on the moon plot." I think at the very least we'll have to visit it when they tell Imahara Joe (and hopefully Dancer, too.)
Ultimately, again, while I do love the episodes after Molly's death, episode 27 only has three party members in it, and episode 30 is arguably more about Fjord and Jester and Yasha being rescued (and on a meta level, welcoming Travis and Laura back to the table after parental leave) and incorporating Caduceus into the group as it is about Molly being dead. A lot of the conversations are about that, and 31 is very much about fucking around in Zadash and doing weird shit! Jester and Veth make Molly illusions not long after while on Darktow! The effects of Molly's death ripple through, quite honestly, the entire rest of the campaign and the grief is very nonlinear. Again, I adore episode 2x30, but I think one should be careful not to overly romanticize it; the party is still very much working through those initial feelings throughout the entire pirates arc, which takes place over the span of a couple of months. Bells Hells might not have months, and it might not get explored to the same extent, but I do think we'll see the effects nonetheless.
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canirove · 3 days
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Friends, lovers… and an orange | Chapter 8
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"Ok, so. What does the birthday boy want to do next?"
"Take a nap?" Mason chuckled.
"A nap? Seriously? What about getting some ice-cream?"
"Addie, it's January!"
"And?" she shrugged.
"It is too cold for ice-cream. Besides, I'm full after that Sunday roast."
"They say ice-cream is digestive."
"I think I'll pass."
"Ok" Adele sighed. "Then what do you want to do?"
It technically wasn't Mason's birthday yet, it was in a couple of days. But since he had to work the next day and on his actual birthday he was throwing a party, that was the only day both of them were free to do something alone.
"Going home and taking a nap."
"Boring."
"But that's what I am in the mood for."
"Yeah, your mood" Adele said while they kept walking. "What is going on with you lately?"
"With me? Nothing."
"Mase, you've been acting super weird since the new year. Is it because of the kiss?"
"The kiss?"
"Yeah. About the photos and the article. Did it bother you?"
"Oh, that" Mason said, looking down. 
"You know you can tell me anything, right? That's what friends are for."
"Yes, friends."
"Mase, what is it?" Adele insisted, grabbing him by the arm and making him stop. "C'mon, you can trust me. What happened?"
"It's just... It's..." 
"C'mon" she said with an encouraging smile.
"It's something I have to do for work that I know you won't like."
"Something like what?" Adele asked.
"A brand I work with, one of the big ones. They want me to... They... It's for Valentine's Day."
"Oh… I see."
"They have this campaign about that day being not only about a partner, that it can be about everyone you love. Your family, your friends, your pets... And they want me to post some photos with the people I love."
"And they want you to post one with me."
"Yeah" Mason sighed.
"No."
"What?"
"I said no. We are not playing the press game" Adele said, crossing her arms over her chest.
"But..."
"I said no, Mason. Post photos with your parents, your brother, your friends... But not with me. I'm not allowing it."
"But Addie, you are my friend, you just said it. And I have to do it, it's part of the contract."
"Then tell them I've said no! I'm on my right to do it, I'm the one in the photos!"
"It isn't that easy."
"It actually is. My photos, my choice" she shrugged.
"The deal with this brand is one of the big ones, I can't lose it. And besides..." Mason said while nervously playing with his hands.
"Besides what?"
"I have to do it, Addie. I have to."
"Why, Mase? What is going on?" she said, taking a step closer. He looked so... Worried.
"Do you trust me?" he asked her.
"You know I do."
"Then please say yes to this. Please" he begged.
"I'm sorry, Mason. But no."
"Adele..."
"I've said no. End of the story" she said, starting to walk again.
"C'mon, think about it. It's just a photo. We'll pick one from Christmas for example. One you like."
"I've said no, Mason!" she said as she turned around, raising her voice maybe way too much. "I'm not gonna let them use me to earn more money, and I'm not gonna give the press an excuse to start harassing me again now that things seem to have calmed down. No means no."
"But..."
"I said no" Adele repeated, giving her back to Mason and walking away.
━━━━━━❃━━━━━━
"So I am the bad guy now?"
"I'm afraid so."
"Great" Adele sighed.
What had happened the day after her argument with Mason? That they were on the Daily Mail because someone had sold them photos of her and Mason at the restaurant where they had eaten, and of everything that had happened after. Of their argument. And in those photos, Mason looked like a sad puppy while she just yelled at him, which had made his fans turn against her for hurting him, bitch being the nicest thing they were calling her.
"Have you spoken with him?" Jourdan asked.
"Nope."
"What about tomorrow's party? Are we still going?"
"You can go if you want to. I don't want to see him."
"But Addie... You need to talk about this. About the photos and the campaign."
"There is nothing else to say. We must have a stalker, and I don't want him to use me."
"Then talk about whatever is going on with him. Look at his face in these photos! And you keep saying he is acting weird. Adele, he needs you. He needs his friend."
"Jourdan..."
"Come to the party, please" she pouted. "Besides, you know who is gonna be there. If I go alone, I'll end up on his bed again."
"Quoting Dua Lipa now?" Adele chuckled.
"She was right, wasn't she?"
"She was, yes. But I don't know... What if he doesn't want to see me?"
"I'm sure he's dying to apologize, Addie. Especially after the way his fans are treating you."
"I'll think about it."
"Thank you" Jourdan said while hugging her.
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"Adele, you came!"
"Hello, Jacob."
"And you too, Jourdan" he smirked.
"Hello."
"Did the paps outside catch you?"
"Of course they did. They were waiting for me" Adele said.
"I thought you would not show up after your argument with Mason, you know? He's been looking like shit and even thought about canceling the party."
"Really?" she asked.
"Yup. I don't know what happened between you two, he hasn't said a word. But my boy has fallen for you, and hard."
"Jacob, we aren't together or anything like that, it's all the press."
"That's not what I said" he smirked again. "Anyway, gotta keep greeting people, I'm on door duty."
"Enjoy" Jourdan said.
"What... What did he mean?" Adele asked her when Jacob left them alone.
"Nothing, don't worry. He's probably already drunk. Should we get ourselves something to drink?"
"Yeah... Let's stick to our plan of being together and keeping you as away from him as we can."
But their plan didn't last long. After a couple of drinks, Jourdan was dancing with one of Mason's friends and getting very cosy, leaving Adele alone while keeping an eye on her.
"Hello."
"Fuck!"
"Sorry" Mason said next to her. "Didn't mean to startle you."
"It's ok, don't worry. Happy birthday, by the way."
"Thank you" he smiled. Though again, it was that sad smile. The one he had had since the year started. "I thought you wouldn't come after... You know."
"Yeah... But Jourdan asked me to help her stay away from Jacob, and I couldn't say no. And I also wanted to check on you. How are you?"
"I don't know, to be honest" he said, running a hand through his hair.
"Why don't we go somewhere quiet where we can talk?" Adele smiled, giving his arm an encouraging squeeze. 
"What about Jourdan?"
"It looks like she is ending the night with that friend of yours, she'll be fine."
"He actually is one of the good ones."
"Nothing to worry about, then. C'mon" she said, taking Mason's hand and leading them outside. 
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"Here."
"Thank you, Mase" Adele said, putting on the coat he had given her. After looking for a place where they could talk and having to see some things they would have preferred not to see, they decided to go outside to one of the balconies. "I didn't expect it to be this cold."
"It's January, Addie" he chuckled.
"I know. But earlier it wasn't this cold."
"Do you want to go inside?"
"Nah, it's fine. Besides, I've always loved the view from here. Even at night it looks beautiful."
"It is one of the reasons why I chose this house."
"I'm sorry" Adele said.
"About the house?"
"No, no. About our argument the other day."
"I should be the one saying sorry. You were pretty clear about not wanting your photo to be used, and I kept insisting."
"But I could have been nicer, you know? Or make less of a scene."
"I've seen you do worse. You are a bit of a drama queen."
"Who, me?"
"Sorry" Mason smiled. And this time, it was an honest smile. The dimple was giving it away.
"I've missed seeing you smile like that."
"How?"
"Like that" Adele said, taking a step closer. "Like you really mean it. What is going on, Mase?"
"Nothing."
"It clearly is something" she said, taking his hand on hers.
"It's just... It's my agency" he sighed.
"What about them?"
"They keep pushing me to do things I don't want to or agree with."
"Then say no, leave them. It's that easy."
"It isn't, Addie."
"Why not? I remember my mum talking about a friend of hers breaking a contract with an agency that wasn't treating her well."
"Yes, but in my case it isn't that easy. There are... Clauses."
"Clauses?"
"Yes. And if I do something that goes against them, I'll be in big trouble."
"Will they sue you?"
"They could end my career."
"Holy shit, Mase" Adele said, caressing his cheek with her free hand, the other still holding his.
"That's why I kept insisting on the photo. If I don't do it..."
"But you are their best client! They wouldn't be that stupid, would they?"
"When there is money involved, people don't care about certain things."
"I'm so sorry, Mase."
"It's ok, don't worry."
"No, it's not" she said, wiping away a tear from his cheek. "There must be something we can do."
"Do as they say" he chuckled.
"What if I talk with them? What if I tell them I don't want my photo being shared?"
"Please don't" Mason said, closing most of the space between them. 
"I already told you, I'm on my right to..."
"Don't. Trust me and do as I say. Please."
"But..."
"Please, Addie. Promise me you won't talk with them" he said, caressing her cheek the way she had done with his. He looked so worried, so desperate.
"Ok. I promise."
"Thank you" he sighed, resting his forehead on hers.
"But only if you promise me that you won't do anything stupid."
"I won't" Mason whispered.
"Good. Now come here" Adele said, hugging him as tight as she could. "Everything will be alright, Mase."
"Everything will be alright" he repeated against her neck, his lips touching her skin as he spoke and making the goosebumps she had felt when they had kissed, come back.
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