It's past 3am and I don't have the time, the spoons, or the emotional strength to elaborate.

Edit: I elaborated anyways. This is Heavy and I guess I still have a lot to work through...

(Personal family stuff below. tl;dr I'm learning to accept that I'll never be as close and trusting with and feel as loved by my stepmother and father as I want to, but it still hurts.)

((And don't reblog this or you Will be blocked.))

--

Lately, I've been wondering... See, when it turned out I was living in a house that might be foreclosed any day because the property owner hadn't paid taxes in years, I moved back in with my stepmother and father for a month, just long enough to get a lease signed and move in to my own place ASAP.

I appreciated them letting me do that. (Although I know the primary motivation was them needing the money I'd pay in rent.)

They acted like they LOVED me being there.

But here's the thing: I wasn't really there.

Physically, yes. But not mentally. Not emotionally.

I've learned how to lie to their faces. I've learned how to hide who I really am in front of them, because I'm sick of being real enough to constantly upset them. I'm sick of the arguments, the screaming, the relentless emotional abuse. I'm sick of constantly having to defend myself and leaving conversations in tears because everything about me somehow offends them.

I only spoke up to agree with them. I only spoke when spoken to. I only interacted when someone initiated it. I nodded, I listened, I hid everything about my own thoughts and feelings and vulnerabilities and life.

I gave up long ago.

I pretended to be a shell of who I am, an empty shell filled with what they wanted from me.

And we didn't argue.

But we don't really make connections that way, do we? They aren't really loving "me" that way, are they?

I also grew very sick of walking on eggshells and cutting my feet to keep the rest of me from being burned.

But ever since I moved out, about 9 months ago by now, stepmom and Dad have sent me messages. Inviting me to family functions (only if I'll spend the whole weekend there or spend $700 to get there). Saying they're thinking about me. Saying they love me.

And it's been making me question myself. Is putting distance between us really the right choice? Is it cruel of me to avoid it? Am I just being pessimistic about our relationships? Is it possible that they really want to get to know me better?

Is there really hope of us reconnecting?

But when I was desperately combing through my files tonight to try finding those Missing Writing Files, I found a file compiling all the ways stepmother and dad have hurt me.

Do you know what quote I used to name that file?

"My only weakness was loving you."

When people say "forgiving someone doesn't make it okay", then what is forgiveness saying? What is forgetting everything they've done? What does it solve, what does it accomplish? What does it do besides leave you open to being hurt again by people who will never change?

People you've tried to talk to, to make amends, to problem-solve with, to open up to, to try mending your hearts together. People you've employed six years of communication training and therapy and compassion and empathy for. People you tried so, so hard to understand, to help them understand you.

People who spent those entire conversations spitting in your face.

And all they tell you is that you're being disrespectful by being hurt when they scream at you. Or call you names. Or tell you your wants and needs don't matter. Put you down. Threaten your future. Threaten to kick you out. Mock your insecurities. Call you inhuman. Tell you you have 30 days and when you write up a letter for them to sign so you can get assisted housing because you only work 10 hours a week minimum wage and you'll be homeless if they don't, they steadfastly refuse.

Am I a bad person for not wanting to forgive them?

I won't say I'm holding onto the pain intentionally. I won't say I'm bitter. I'm angry, yes, a little, but mostly I'm sad.

I mourn what I daydream about, but will never be. (Them learning how to love me kindly.)

I put, in that file, a blogged journal entry about the time I dreamed my father hugged me when he saw me crying instead of yelling at me for it, and it was so important and needed and promising that I woke up crying for real because it will never happen.

They refuse to ever, ever even CONSIDER that the way they acted was wrong. The only apologies I've ever gotten were sarcastic or refuted. Those apologies that are rhetorical devices to set up how sorry they really AREN'T. "I'm sorry I'm such a bad person." "I'm sorry, but you were wrong." "I'm sorry you're upset."

I spent the past two hours reading through the story of my adult life with them. After I realized it was emotional abuse. After I started trying to reach out. After I learned how to defend myself in the moment, but not from the lasting impact.

And even still, maybe I haven't learned that lesson. Because I can't make peace with the fact that I'll never make peace with them.

Gods, it hurts, it burns, it stings, to think that after everything they've done to me, every cruel word, I still WANT them. But what I want from them isn't how they actually are. What I want from them is the version that I've imagined. The ideal scenarios I conjure to try piecing together what would help, what would soothe the pain, what would make me feel loved.

Because the reality is that I haven't felt loved by them in a very long time. They can say it all they want, but the times they've said "you don't matter" or "you're a failure" or "you're an awful person" or "I don't care how badly I hurt you" drowns it out.

The last entry in the file goes like this:

I love her, as I love any other person, just enough to stay silent when she says, “Sometimes I wonder if I made the right decision” or “sometimes I wonder if you would be better off without me”. Guess what… I would. But I can’t tell her that. It would DESTROY her, to hear it from ME and not just her subconscious. I can’t destroy her. As much as she has taken from me, and hurt me, and scarred me to the point where I’m afraid to ask my best friends permission to do things… As much social anxiety as she has given me in everyday interactions? As much trust as she destroyed, as much as she has RUINED me? Even after everything she’s done? I can’t destroy her, too……..

And there's a part of me that wonders if my self-esteem is Still Too Low, because maybe I don't love myself enough to be infuriated by the mere insinuation that I "should" love them, even after everything they've forced upon me. Maybe I don't love myself enough to protect myself from these silly little daydreams, these hopes, these wishes, that someday they WILL love me for who I am, and not just who they're telling themselves I am.

I'm not a bitter person by nature. I'm not angered by the way people treat me. I just... get really sad, and spend an hour thinking about it and typing about it on my online journal.

It hurts, but I'm trying to accept it. It's a sort of grief, having spent 20+ years of my life trying to earn their love and begging for their understanding. Hope is such a strong, persistent thing for me.

But I have to accept that they've never going to change how they treat me until they can realize that the way they've done it all my life is WRONG. Until they decide they WANT to change. Until they decide to accept that it is, in fact, Not Okay to scream at a child for forgetting to put the dishes away.

And I have to assert, to myself moreso than them, that this is the right decision. That it's not worth the constant letdowns, the pain, the strife, the heart-rending accusations that were leveled at me every single time I lived there for more than 35 days.

I have to tell myself that it's worth it to PROTECT myself. It's important for me to heal. It's important for me to surround myself in people who DO love me for who I am, and who are there to support me when I need it. It's important for me to be where I don't have to pretend to be someone entirely different just to avoid being hurt again.

I am worth protecting, and they are not worth hurting myself over.

But it doesn't stop me from aching over the fact that I have to make that decision.

OK RUIN DLC AVAILABLE!! Can I make a request then? How do Ruin glam.freddy, Ruin glam.chica, Ruin Monty, and Ruin Roxy react to an overwhelmed reader? Too much is happening to Child Reader and he ends up crying or bursting with rage. How would they react to the reader? (sorry for my english 😅)

Oh don't worry! Your english is good! (for this, we'll just say reader takes Cassie's place)

.........

Prototype/Ruined Freddy

All you wanted to do was find your friend, and you thought you'd find an ally in your quest when you discovered Freddy in the decrepit Fazer Blaster room.

But something was very wrong as he emerged from the wreckage, joints clicking and parts shuffling before he finally turns to screech at you with great hostility.

Not with his mouth, as he lacked a head, but with his birthday cake hatch that acted like a gaping monstrous maw.

He hunted you down like a wild animal, chasing you until you managed to reach the next inhibitor-

Only for Freddy to be there first, cornering you at last and almost daring you to come closer.

But you were so terrified, so stressed that...you just hid somewhere and cried, not caring what happens to you anymore. "I-I'm sorry, Gregory..I can't do this. I'm too scared and I don't know where I'm going!!"

It's in that moment where Freddy briefly snaps out of the M.X.E.S programming controlling him.

He may have been a prototype, but he did have similar directives to his successor--that being to ensure the safety and happiness of all children who visited. That was his priority.

He follows your cries, and instead of attacking, he offers you the green present in his chest to cheer you up.

You worried it was some trick, but you take it anyways, finding a scratched-up Freddy magnet inside, barely recognizable aside from the shape.

Relieved, you smile and pocket the gift, wiping away your tears. "Th-Thanks, Freddy.."

He stands back up, only for the M.X.E.S to take ahold of him again.

While he's fighting back against it, you duck under him and turn off the inhibitor before making your escape, not looking back once even as he storms after you.

At least you knew he wasn't doing this on purpose.

Ruined Chica

If you weren't already overwhelmed enough by everything happening within the ruined mall...Chica's shattered voicebox was the icing on top.

The noises hurt your ears so, so much..and suddenly you became terrified of every creaking or grating metal sound, always thinking it's her.

Staying on your toes was important, of course, though it was getting to be too much for you to bear.

When she's hunting you down in one of the kitchens, you're so stressed that you end up hiding and covering your ears, trying not to cry as the noises continued.

Before they...abruptly stopped, as she's now aware that her voice simply wasn't going to come back.

But in that moment, she heard your sniffle and immediately found your hiding spot.

You think you're doomed until she sees you covering your ears still, and despite her eyes being out of sorts..

They looked quite guilty.

The M.X.E.S has no control over her at the moment, so she spares you and leaves.

At some point later on you find her original voice box, seeking her out and repairing her to the best of your ability.

"I smell pizza!!" She trills, before the reality sets in that she has her voice back at last!

And it's a brief moment of happiness for her before she shuts down, seeing you by her side as her vision goes dark.

While doing this didn't make you any less stressed about your search for your friend...you felt better knowing you helped her.

Ruined Roxy

She wasn't targeting you because of the M.X.E.S, but rather because she assumed you were Gregory, threatening to tear out your eyes and make them hers.

However she decided to stalk you at a very bad time, as you began shouting and throwing stuff at her after getting so fed-up with coming to dead ends and Helpi's irritating voice.

The first thing was a plushie, which isn't super effective in hurting her, but the sudden impact startled her nevertheless.

Then you began pelting whatever you could find on the ground. Soda cans, crumbled papers, etc. even as she apologized over and over, shielding herself.

"K-Kid, I'm sorry..!!"

"I'm not afraid you anymore!! LEAVE ME ALONE, FREAK!!"

Suddenly, she freezes up, sniffling before she touches her face self-consciously.

"Th-That's right..I'm...I-I'm a freak...I'm a hideous freak!!" She wails, ultimately collapsing to the ground crying.

You stop, realizing the (emotional) damage you've done and....feeling guilty when you see her sobbing.

You honestly thought she was mindless like all the others...and yet..part of her old personality remained, notably the "insecure" part of it.

Keeping the mask clipped to your side (as you didn't wanna see her through some green hologram), you approach and kneel down, awkwardly trying to comfort her.

"Roxy? I-I...I didn't mean to call you that. I'm sorry." You frown. "You're not a freak, you're still..um...p-pretty. I..I've just been angry and I took it out on you...because you keep thinking I'm Gregory."

She's surprised to hear that you aren't actually him, but is still hurt by the insult.

You stay with her for a bit, reminding her of the mantras she used to tell herself back then, and she begins to repeat them with a smile on her face.

"Your tail is beautiful, your hair is beautiful..and everyone loves you."

"My tail...is beautiful. My hair is..beautiful...and everyone loves me.."

"Yeah, that's good!"

Ruined Monty

He used to be the coolest character to you.

But now? He was nothing like his former self. Just a mindless beast crawling around and trying to bite your legs off.

It was sad, in a way.

Yet you've been attacked by him nonstop ever since you got that stupid mask.

He didn't just scare you, though.

If anything...you got angry right back at him, shouting at him to go away and/or throwing whatever you could to keep him off your back.

Somehow he keep finding you. It's like he had some personal vendetta against you and was powered by rage alone.

In Gator Golf, you found a golf club that wasn't broken, deciding to keep it with you should you ever need to defend yourself.

He was an alligator, yet it somehow shocked you when you're trying to reach the next conduit to unlock a door....and discover that he can swim.

You were stuck traversing boxes like you were playing "the floor is lava"...except the lava is Monty, of course.

When you finally unlock the door, he roars and makes a desperate grab for your leg, and would have succeeded in dragging you into the electrified water...

Had you not used the club to break his hand and chip some of his teeth.

It seemed to bring him genuine pain....but you didn't care.

"Sorry, Monty...BUT I'M NOT YOUR DINNER!!!" You shout as you knock him back into the water, watching him fry.

Part of you felt guilty for doing that once you calmed down and got to safely, but what else could you do?

He was too far gone to help. You had to put him out of his misery.

Hi Mother Pinnie I hope your day/night is going well. How would the clergymen react to their obsessions fainting from seeing their cocks for the first time?

Your ocs make me bark like a dog and keep me warm thinking about them. But thinking of actually being face to face with things like Vinnel's rotting horror goop dick and Morell's cock that looks like it can split a person in two is enough for me to feel very a bit panicky to put it mildly.

May your bagels be forever plain and delicious.

[What do you call this, "cock fright"? "Penis terror"? "Manmeat panic"?]

TW: Noncon.

You faint from the "grand reveal"

Morell just sort of gawks... Well, he's pretty big compared to you, and he likes to think he's packing pretty well, but is it really that big for you? If you were that scared, you could have just told him, you poor little thing. In the end, he fixes you up and takes care of himself, chuckling about your silly reaction. Guess he'll go slower next time.

Gallon assumes your reaction was due to the prehensile nature of his dick. Maybe you're one of those people that's really scared of things that squirm. Which is a shame, because he can't really help that. The slime sighs and scoops you up safely, wondering if your second time seeing it will be as ridiculous as this one was. He can try to shape it differently, but his excitement won't help...

Vinnel snorts. Aw geez, does he scare you that much? It's actually kind of flattering. And hot. Fuck, he can feel himself throb just thinking of forcing you to blow him, while you cry and scream around his cock, afraid that you'll get sick from going down on him. Vinnel wants to see the terror on your face as he pounds you full of his slime and you have no choice but to take the thing you're so frightened of. You'll wake up to his cock inches from your face.

Santi doesn't know how to feel. Maybe he got you too horny? There was definitely arousal when you fainted. This is very odd, even the virgins he's had up until now didn't faint like this, though some would look away from his length. Guess he'll have to try something softer... Next time you two get intimate, he'll make sure you can't see his cock, just feel it. Maybe after you feel how good it is, you'll want an eyeful.

Grimbly just blinks. What... Why??? What's wrong with his cock? What did he do? Is it- Do you not like it?! HUH?! He doesn't understand why you'd react that way at all and he's going to become very insecure about exposing it to you in the future. Catch him examining his dick in front of a mirror, tears in his eyes as he tries to decipher what's so horrifying.

Patches wonders if maybe you thought he'd have no cock. Maybe you assumed it had rotted off a long time ago and the shock of finding out there's actually something between his legs just... Made you faint. That's, well, unexpected. Sure his dick is green and it has some vine-protrusions like the rest of his skin, but other than that it's pretty standard and humanoid. What's wrong with it? Huh.

Sybastian recoils. Woah. That's new. He's pretty huge for a mimic, but he doesn't think he's hung like a fucking horse, there's not need to faint. He tucks himself away and wonders what to do. Maybe you're not ready for his cock yet, he might have to use his tongue for now. Humans are frail little things, physically and mentally, so he's not too sure what to do beyond giving you some time before trying again.

Nebul actually snickers. Oh, you're adorable. Perhaps Master worked you up a little too much. Were you so afraid of disappointing him that your little mind just short-circuited? Hah, oh he enjoys you so very much. Too bad, you'll have to face it, so better get used to it. You'll wake up to Nebul inside you. Not moving, just inside you.

Belo is genuinely terrified. He knew it was too soon! What a fool he was! Look what he did, now you're probably traumatized. You hate him, you hate him because he was filthy and animalistic and it was too much to handle for you. He won't forgive himself so easily. He's a degenerate!! Please forgive him, please please please-

Fank-e freezes. Oh. Oh okay... Maybe he should attach one of the smaller builds. Not that he likes them too much, but maybe something less flashy will sit well with his startled little qt. In the worst case scenario, he can go for a pussy and ditch dicks until you're more comfortable. Fank-e's going to have you search various models with him so you don't faint again, even if it was pretty funny to him.

Krulu gets a massive power rush. Yes, faint at the sight of him. You know how great of an honor his offering is, and your mind broke because of it. Simple creature, your humble nature is flattering, but you have nothing to fear- Only pleasure from now on. Although, if the sight of his malehood is that imposing to you, then you best make it up to him by servicing his cunt.

HEY PEOPLE!!! THIS IS THE OFFICIAL 100 FOLLOWER SPECIAL!!!

And in commemoration of that, I (with the help of talking to @lotties-ashwagandha) have created this fic, please enjoy.

Summary: Basically just reader (18/19) being new to Lottie's wellness centre and having a pre-made bond with her, and sort of one with Nat (since she gets inducted into it a few weeks after r), then the rest of the adults arrive and things get interesting...

This is a bit of a long-en and it took fucking forever, and it feels a little rushed, but oh well, enjoy :)

@zhivaxo

*****

Eat Your Young

❤️🧡💚💜💙💛

Adult YellowJacket's x Late Teen!GN/AFAB Reader

❤️🧡💚💜💙💛

Word Count: 3152.

I may have gotten a little carried away w/ this, but I just love them all sm, and istg if this flops I will cry cause I actually love this sm.

Also he/him and transmasc Van and Nat, cause I love them 😁.

*****

You'd arrived at the compound about a couple of months ago, after Lottie had spotted you being dragged around at a farmers market in downtown New York she was also at, by your asshole of a father who insisted upon showing you the exact and only crafted beer he liked and drank (nothing of which ever ended well when he drank it).

Of course, after noticing what was actually going on by the way he acted toward you, she insisted upon taking you away from him to the compound, and to also help you cope with your past trauma, once she got to speak with you alone. At first to which you denied, unsure of what would happen and if your father would find you if accepted.

Eventually, she got you to accept, god damn those pleading brown eyes of hers. Which was how you ended up here, Camp Green Pine (it was actually really pretty now that you thought about it), or Lottie's cult, as Nat had referred to it on multiple occasions, which you found rather assuming, of which you'd never admit to Lottie.

The same 'here' that one of Lottie and Nat's old friends, Misty, turned up at about a week after Nat first got here, with somebody else, Waldo you recalled his name being, or Walter. The two of them later on being joined by some of their other friends, later of which, you learned their names, Tai, Van and Shauna.

More specifically, the 'here' that was known as the sharing shack, having been trying to track Lottie down for the last hour, having gotten lost at least a couple times, wanting to review one of your sessions for the week, unsure of what it meant. All of which was soon forgotten when you stumbled upon her and her old friends in said sharing shack, the previous conversation dying down pretty quickly upon your entry.

"Hi, sorry I don't mean to intrude. I just wanted to borrow Charlotte for a minute, go over this one part of my schedule for this week. I can go though if this is a bad time." You stated, stumbling over your own words, not wanting to make a bad first impression on the other 4.

"Of course not, my love, come sit." Lottie answered, patting the seat to her left, between her and Natalie.

"Okay," You answered, nervously walking over to and taking your seat next to the two of them, dressed in an oversized heliotrope jumper, light blue denim jeans and black converse, before handing her the piece of paper, as she inspected it.

Watching on as the others exchanged slightly awkward glances, flashing them small smiles as some sort of piece offering, to which none of them acknowledged, except the blonde that was sitting next to Nat, who offered a small wave back, which you replied with a small nod, moving slightly closer to Lottie, feeling Nat's hand rest on the small of your back as some form of comfort you were guessing.

"Yeah don't worry about it, it's just like the group therapy you sat in on Monday morning, except more of how to cope with specific issues, rather then sharing experiences and stuff, since I know that's a tough thing for you to do." Lottie spoke, turning back to and smiling sweetly at you and handing you back your schedule, to which you folded up and slid into your back pocket.

"Oh okay, that uh makes sense, thank you." You replied, still feeling the rest of the groups gaze on you, taking this as your cue to get up and leave, as you went to do so you felt Nat tug on the bottom of your jumper.

"Um, excuse you." You stated, not wanting to cause a scene.

"What, you want me to do everything here?" Nat said, turning to Lottie, then the rest of the group.

"Listen dove," Lottie started, taking your hand and guiding you to sit back down, "I hope you don't mind, but I've been talking to the group about you tonight, along with some of your past........ issues." The brunette added, moving her hand to rest on your thigh as you gulped.

You weren't sure how to take this. 'What past issues did she mean?' Were they the ones you cried to her over? No, she wouldn't, would she? More importantly, why would she?'

"Oh, okay," You spoke, unsure of where this conversation headed. "What issues were you talking about?"

"Well uh, just some of the general stuff, since some of them," She shot a look at Tai and Van, who were quick to look down at the floor, a slight blush prominent on their cheeks. "had questions about you, and wanted to know some things about you." Lottie explained, running her thumb over the plush part of your inner thigh, trying to provide some sort of comfort.

"What, like how old I am, see if any of my past traumas match up with yours?" You retorted jokingly, smirking slightly, the room falling slightly tense as you were fully understanding the manor of their previous conversation.

The room went quiet, before the curly blonde, Misty, stood up and walked over to you, crouching in front of you.

"We just wanna help you, my love." The woman said, resting a hand on your knee, the other intertwining with your own hand, lifting it to her lips, pressing a kiss on the back of your hand softly, looking up at you sincerely. 'She seems nice' you thought to yourself, as you blushed softly.

"I can't believe I'm saying this, but Misty's right, darling." Nat spoke, his hand still resting and rubbing up and down your lower back.

"What you went through with your dad. What he did to you, to try and change you and stuff, honestly I-," He cut himself off sensing the change in your body language at the sensitive subject, your gaze going from looking at her to down at your lap, fiddling with your hands, before speaking up again. "Look, we just wanna help, in anyway we can."

"Mhm." The rest of them agreed, as the other brunette, Shauna, suddenly appeared behind you, essentially boxing you in between her, Nat, Misty and Lottie.

"Will you let us help you out, sweetheart?" Shauna asked, smoothing her hands over your shoulders.

"O-okay," You replied, removing your gaze from your lap to glance up at her, before looking back at the group. "I don't know how, but you can, all of you can, help, I mean." You added, slightly flustered, as the brunette behind you shared a knowing look with the rest of the group, causing Nat to take your other hand, him and Misty standing you up and leading you back to Lottie's quarters, Shauna and Lottie following behind, Tai and Van following after them.

A million questions were running through your mind as you were lead toward Lottie's bedroom, like 'Was what you thought was gonna happen actually about to happen? Was this some sort of fever dream?'.

All of which were quickly forgotten when you arrived at Lottie's, Nat's hands quickly moving to your jumper, slipping them under it and pulling it over your head, discarding it on the floor, while Van came around your back and started kissing along your neck slowly, and the rest of the group were ridding themselves of their shoes and clothes.

"They look so pretty for us, right guys?" Van stated, littering your jaw with soft kisses. "Is that okay to say?" He added, to which you replied with a nod.

"Damn right they are." Nat answered, everybody else agreeing in some way, her hands going down to your belt, unbuckling it before unzipping your jeans, discarding both of them on the growing pile of clothes on the floor, leaving you in your binder and boxer shorts and everyone in the room, except Nat and Van, in just their underwear.

"It's alright," Lottie stated, approaching you in her matching set of dark purple lingerie, as the other two pulled away from you to sort their clothes out, "just trust us, okay? We'll take care of you" She added, smoothing her thumbs over your ribs and planted a soft kiss on your forehead, sensing your anxiousness.

You nodded in response, feeling Shauna and Misty come up behind you, the brunette starting to plant kisses along your right shoulder, while the blonde did the same to your left, running her hands over the bottom of your binder, as they led you back onto Lottie's bed, pushing you down onto it lightly as your legs hit the end of it, before climbing onto it to sit either side of you and start attacking your face and neck with long, heated kisses.

Lottie then came over to you with Tai, kneeling on the hardwood floors of her cabin between your thighs, as Tai came and sat on the bed running her fingers over your stomach and up your chest, making more warmth pool into your lower abdomen while Shauna and Misty continued kissing along your shoulders and up and down either side of your neck and jawline.

"Is it okay if I take this off, baby?" Tai questioned, resting her hands at the hem of your binder.

"Mhm," You answered, nodding slowly, slightly apprehensive to let it happen, "You can take it off." You added, lifting your arms up slightly to assist with her taking your binder, straightening it out and placing it on the floor with a light thud.

Misty and Shauna moved their mouths over your shoulders, sucking hickeys over them and along your jaw and neck softly, making you moan slightly, as Lottie moved her hands further up your thighs to your boxers, looking up at you and then back down at your briefs, wordlessly communicating with you as you nodded at her, then pulling them down a little, letting her do the rest as Van came over, and sat next to you, between Tai and Misty, and started to run her hand over the side of your chest.

After a little while of Misty and Shauna continuing to kiss along either side of your neck and shoulders, while Lottie finished pulling your boxers down to your ankles, running her fingers along your slit, starting to run her thumb over your clit, making you whine slightly.

"Sh sh sh, it's okay baby. Just trust me, alright? It'll be worth it." The brunette stated, before leaning down and pressing a kiss against it, making you moan softly.

Once Lottie started working her mouth against your clit, Van took this opportunity to use his newfound confidence to lean forward and rest his hand on your boob, squishing and kneading it slightly and giggling softly.

"Wow, seriously, are you still 12?" Tai spoke, watching this exchange.

"What?! They're good boobs, okay? Sue me." Van spoke, defending his actions, with a slight scowl before his expression dropped and he spoke again. "Oh wait, fuck, that's okay to say, right?" He added.

"It's fine Van, honestly, don't worry about it. This seriously feels like a fever dream, I'm really not that bothered what you call me as long as you don't call me a girl or a boy" You replied, giggling slightly yourself, to which Van replied with a nod, going back to squishing both your boobs while Lottie started working her mouth on your clit swirling her tongue around it, eliciting strings of moans from your mouth.

"Such pretty noises, baby." Tai stated, leaning forward and kissing you softly, before taking your bottom lip between her teeth, biting and sucking on it softly, before reaching down, resting the back of her palm on Lottie's chin and pushing to fingers inside you, forcing another moan out of you.

'God this is pure bliss' you thought.

Lottie working her mouth on your clit, while Misty and Shauna were pressing theirs against your neck and jaw line and down your shoulders over and over

Van was kneading hos hand over your boob, while Tai was pressing hers against Lottie's chin while working her fingers inside you, and Nat, Nat was god knows where, but you didn't think of that too much right now.

All you were focused on was the warm feeling that was flowing in your lower abdomen, and feeling every bit of their combined touch that was gliding over your body.

"Oh pretty baby, you that close already?" Tai piped up, feeling you start to clench around her fingers, looking up at you and seeing you bite your lip. "Tsk tsk tsk tsk." She muttered under her breath, starting to curl her fingers inside you slightly faster.

"I- ah, I'm- fuck, I'm sorry. I can try and wait, I didn't mean to- god. I can try, I can-" You stuttered out, being cut off by Misty pressing her finger over your mouth.

"Sh sh sh, it's okay. It's more then okay, that's exactly what we wanted. It's okay" The blonde reassure, pressing a kiss against your jaw.

"I- are you, are you sure?" You asked, tilting your head back slightly.

"Mhm," Shauna reassured, running her hand over your shoulder. "It's okay, just let go, alright sweetheart?"

You looked down at Lottie, who was still working her mouth on your clit, for some sort of reassurance or confirmation.

"It's okay," Lottie stated, glancing up at you, running her thumb over your thigh, while trailing her tongue over your clit. "Just wait a little longer, alright? Can you do that for mommy?"

"Momm- I- fuck, mommy please, I can't-." You begged, tilting your head back against Misty's shoulder, moaning and panting softly, getting closer.

"Okay, okay, it's okay. Just take your time." Tai said, glancing down at Lottie, while still working her fingers inside you, feeling you clench a little more.

"Fuck- mommy! I'm gonna cum, please please please please." You begged a little more.

"Okay baby, you got it. Cum for us, darling." Lottie stated, just before you fell over the edge with a long, loud moan.

Cumming all over Tai's fingers and Lottie's mouth, dripping down her chin, while bucking your hips up against her mouth, riding out your orgasm.

"God, you're so pretty, baby." Van spoke up, leaning in and kissing along your neck, still kneading his hands over your boobs.

"Fuck-" You rasped out after a few moments, tilting your head back against Shauna's shoulder, looking up at her and Misty.

"God, you did so well for us." Shauna said, softly pressing her lips against yours.

"Damn right they did." Nat stated, speaking up for the first time in a while, approaching you and the rest of the group.

Straps secured around his thighs over his boxers, light blue dildo attached to it, making you gulp softly, as you lifted your head up from it's place on Shauna's shoulder.

"It's okay." Lottie assured, as she rose from her place on the floor to kneel between you and Shauna, mirroring Van's position. "Can you look at me, dove?" She added, running her thumb over your chin.

"There's my pretty little baby." The brunette said, running her thumb over your cheek as you tilted your head toward her. "Now listen okay? Natalie's gonna take good care of you, alright baby? And I'll be here the whole time." She added, lacing her fingers with yours to hold your hand gently.

"O-okay," You stated, nodding your head slowly. "Okay." You said again, turning your head toward Nat, who had his tilted to the side, rested her hand on the underside of the strap, jerking it off slightly.

God he looked so hot. Already with sweat clinging to his face, and a small smirk on his lips, and the abs.

"There you go." Nat said, slipping his strap inside you while these thoughts were clouding your mind, making you groan loudly.

"Fuck, Natalie." You moaned out softly, as he pressed his hands down against your hips and start hammering into you, not giving you enough time to adjust. Making the rest of them smirk slightly at how loud you were being, and how gorgeous you looked.

"Oh sweet baby, you sound so good for us. So good for Natalie." Tai stated, starting to run her thumb over your clit, still sensitive from Lottie working her mouth on it earlier.

"Such an eager little love for daddy's cock, hmmm Y/n/n?" Nat said, thrusting his hips slightly harder against yours.

"Fuck, god, yes. Daddy please, I need it so bad." You begged, gripping Lottie's hand tightly, as Tai kept rubbing her thumb over your clit.

That with the help of Nat, who kept hammering himself inside you, had you hurtling toward another orgasm so soon.

"You look so gorgeous all fucked out for Natalie, Y/n." Misty giggled, pressing kisses along the left side of your jaw and down your neck, while Van kept kneading his hands over your boobs, plucking your nipples between his thumb and forefinger.

"I think someone's close again." Shauna perked up, peering over your shoulder to look at Nat, before glancing down to watch your face contort and your mouth open and close, letting out breathy moans.

"No I- no I jus- fuck Natalie! I-" You stuttered out, being cut off by Lottie kissing you again.

"It's okay, love. We're not here to stop you, we're here to make you feel good and give you a treat, alright?" She said, pressing her lips against your cheek.

"Cmon baby," Van whispered against your cheek, still squishing his hand over your boob. "You can do it."

As soon as he said that, combined with the feeling of Nat still forcefully thrusting his strap into you, while grunting softly, and Tai rubbing circles around your clit quicker then before.

Along with the rest of them doing their own things, your senses became overwhelmed with pleasure for the second time that night, causing you to release and came hard over Nat's strap and Tai's hand, while moaning loudly.

As Nat fucked you through your orgasm, Shauna and Misty were still working their mouths along your neck and jaw (by now of which were probably covered in hickeys), and Van was still squishing and plucking your boobs with his fingers.

It wasn't until they helped you slowly ride out your high, that you slumped down against them, sweat dripping off your forehead while panting heavily, and that Nat slowly pulled out, tucking his strap back into his boxers, while he and the rest of the group watched you as you recovered from your climax, letting you return back to yourself.

Once your orgasm had fully subsided, Lottie leant up slightly and softly pressed her lips against yours. Speaking to you, as if only wanting you to hear. "Good job, baby, you did so good. The wilderness is pleased with you now. It's pleased with all of us."

*****

So for those of you still reading, if you didn't get it by now, this was a 100 follower special (yay me, though there is more then 100 of u guys by now but oh well), and I just wanted to hop on here for those that are still reading, I'm so grateful to every single one of you that have interacted with me/my posts over the last year.

I only got into writing fan fiction as an outlet for stuff going on in my personal life (cause life has sucked a lot for me, especially over the last year, but yk we deal), but to know people actually like my stuff is really awesome.

Love you guys lots (I should probably come up with a nickname at this point or something), here's to the next 100 and I hope you enjoyed this fic.

-Harlow

P.s This was fairly rushed at the end and this is defo garbage, but I just wanted to get this out.

And ignore the fact Nat disappeared mid way through this, I didn't know what to do with him, but yk we ball.

How would the sakamaki brothers react if shu becomes suddenly overprotective and controling in a bad and aggressive way?

I assume this would be towards his S/O? Or love interest of sorts? I'll frame it as that, as it's something I could possibly picture Shu doing if we're considering extremes. Thank you for the ask!

Shu becoming possessive and controlling of his love interest...

Reiji Sakamaki:

He knew getting involved with Shu was a bad idea. When you chose him, out of everyone in the household, to be the one to own you, to harvest your blood for himself, Reiji was convinced Shu was manipulating you. He was lazy and never desired to do anything for himself, so having a human to do his bidding sounds like the perfect arrangement for someone as unmotivated as himself. However, the pretences he conjured in his mind soon became a reality and rose to extremes that left even himself utterly perplexed. And so, Reiji confronted you one day, cornered you, unwilling to deal with his excuse of an older brother.

"You were so insistent on staying by that deadbeats' side, and look where that got you. It's pitiful, to be honest. How about I extend an offer to you? It's never too late to choose me..."

Ayato Sakamaki:

Ayato never really cared about the goings on of his oldest brother. Shu stayed out of his way, and therefore, he mimicked that. But when he came to the revelation that you, Shus love interest, the person whose blood's scent emanated from you like mist, had found yourself in a tricky situation in regards to him, Ayato saw his opportunity to gain the one up. He just so happened to stumble upon you one fateful night in the gardens, and so, struck up an albeit rather blunt conversation.

"Ah... there you are! I've been looking all over for you! What do you say we head back to my room? Yours Truly is long overdue some quality alone time with you..."

Kanato Sakamaki:

His brothers were nothing but a nuisance to him - an annoyance in his day-to-day life. But the new perspective bride had caught his interest: you. You had an air about you that captivated Kanato; he was even quite tempted to make you up to be the newest edition to his grandiose collection he has. But... Shu had swept you away long before he even had the chance. However, when word got around the residence that Shu had began showing less than savoury qualities towards his prey, even for vampire standards, Kanato saw opportunity. One minute, you're stood unassuming in the kitchen wondering what to eat. The next you wake up in a dingy, long abandoned shack far from the sight of the mansion.

"You're awake. Good. I was starting to think you'd never wake up... me and Teddy were quite worried... what? Where are we? Oh, don't worry about that. All you need to do is scream for me! I'm going to bite you now. So c'mon! Show me the fear that sits so pretty in your eyes..."

Laito Sakamaki:

Laito had tried his fair share of manoeuvres to make you his own prior to catching wind of this news. However, this news was like music to his ears. He knew that if you could stick so securely to someone like Shu for such a long while now, he didn't have to do too much to win you over either, right? Maybe he could provide something you've been lacking? Sympathy? A shoulder to cry on? Laito can provide that for you. He'd play the long game if it meant getting you to himself, playing on your heartstrings until you eventually broke for him.

"Oh... you poor thing. I've heard about your recent squabbles with my older brother, y'know? Nasty business... but surely you don't think you deserve all of that, right? We may be vampires, but we're not complete monsters. Maybe I could be there for you... to help?"

Subaru Sakamaki:

Believe it or not, once Subaru caught onto this news about Shu, he wasn't after your blood. In fact, he'd hardly do anything unless he saw Shu acting the way he has been in person. Subaru would just be... disappointed in his older brother, and therefore would distance himself from both him as well as you - this entire situation. He'd prefer to stay far away, in case he happened to cause more harm than good, which he believed he certainly had the potential of doing.

"What? You're crying because of that jerk again? It's... none of my business. So, I suggest you leave me out of it unless you want your situation to become even worse. I have no doubt it will if you involve me."

evening hours

ok so hihi i'm back and down bad for dainsleif (as usual)

this is just a quick little idea i had while i was in the car so i wrote this down in a google doc and then pasted it here 😭😭

apologies for any spelling/grammar mistakes, this isn't proofread so there may be a lot :/

anyways thank you for reading and have an amazing day <3

source for the art (i couldn't find the initial artist, i'm sorry) : @abimanyuputro on pinterest

warning! if you're uncomfortable with any of these topics, please don't read : cuteness to angst to comfort, implied overworking from reader but not really specified

++++

mood :

Lavoe - kept crystal castles but its only piano (link to spotify)

daniel.mp3 - 3am walk - slowed & reverbed version (link to spotify)

lil indo - the beach (instrumental/slowed/muffled) (link to spotify)

++++

The first time you saw him, you were intrigued.

He had a mysterious air about him, emphasized by that starry cloak of his that he never seemed to take off. Delicate blonde hair, outlining his features with smooth strands, poured like a golden waterfall from the top of his head, and his cyan eyes were sharp and cold, but you could sense a sort of sadness hidden deep in them whenever you made eye contact. This wasn't a Mondstadter, you knew that for sure. He didn't look like he was from any other region in Teyvat, too - you could only assume that maybe this gentleman had a very unique taste in clothing and was simply blessed with inhumane beauty. You didn't think that he'd keep visiting your café, though.

The second time you saw him, you were curious.

Curious about his mask that covered only half of his face. Curious about his clothing, his mannerisms, his reticent politeness. Curious about why he was here in Mondstadt at all, and for what reason he seemed to be staying here. His face was a blank, white dot in the crowd of regulars you'd see each day, an enigma, and this fact made you wonder. Where did he come from? Why was he so reserved? And, arguably most importantly - who was he, really?

The third time you saw him, you were friendly.

You struck up conversation about the gorgeous weather outside when you brought him his coffee. Of course, he agreed, saying that it was a perfect time to go for a walk in the Whispering Woods, where the overarching trees provided the perfect amount of shade from the sun, and your quick talk ended there. He thanked you with that same quiet civility before you left his table, but this time, it was accompanied by a barely noticeable smile dancing on his fair lips.

The fourth time you saw him, you were open.

Your conversations were getting longer and longer as the days went by. His previously guarded-off persona was crumbling, and it seemed that he was getting more comfortable talking to you (and maybe even simply being around you). His eyes grew softer when you approached, his tense hands relaxed. You liked this new version of him - a version that he seemed to be hiding from you before he knew you meant no harm, a version that finally felt like it could be honest with you. He would be welcome in the café after closing hours, and you would enjoy simply talking to each other over some tea and muffins about the various aspects of your lives. At times, these conversations would get deep, philosophical - you talked about the meaning of life, about fate. He seemed interested in these topics, to your relief. You never really had a person that you could talk to about this, as they either always changed the subject to something a little more "real", or ignored you altogether, but this man was different. You felt like he was an old friend despite never knowing his name.

The fifth time you saw him, you were a mess.

Everything in your life seemed overwhelming, endlessly crushing at this point. You closed the café early today in an attempt to have extra time to pour your emotions out through some good ole crying, but you forgot about the man, still sitting at a table, book in hand. When you didn't come to him after the clock struck 8:15 (the usual time you'd come over after putting all the cups to soak), he looked over at the counter. You weren't there.

He assumed that you had more duties to attend to, and kept reading, keeping one eye the counter while he was doing so. In fact, instead of being in the storage room, whose entrance was past the counter, you were leaning against it, trying desperately to not cry too loudly. Your hot tears stung as they rolled down your cheeks, but you didn't dare move to wipe them away. You didn't want him to see you in this sorry state.

Unluckily for you, he heard one of your short gasps for air. He immediately set his book down to come over to the counter, and lo and behold, you looked up at him, cheeks and nose reddened as he peered over the wooden surface in worry.

"Can I come behind the counter?" he asked in genuine concern, a tone which you had never heard him speak with.

You nodded, sniffling. You must look absolutely pathetic to him right now.

He walked with urgency to you, and knelt across from you on the floor. He took your hands in his as his cyan eyes met your bloodshot ones.

"Are you okay?"

At these soft-spoken words, the dam broke. Tears poured from your eyes like crystal-clear rivers, and you pulled your hands away from his to bury your face in them. You shuddered as you desperately tried to catch quick breaths of air, gasping, eyes screwed shut.

"Hey, hey," he muttered, trying his best to be reassuring. You felt his (rather large) hands cup your face, carefully pulling it upwards. His thumbs wiped away your still-running tears with gentle care.

"Shh. Breathe, just breathe. That's it."

In between sniffles and ragged breaths, you explained why you were in such a state. You were reluctant to tell him - after all, you didn't want him to think ill of you (or worse, to bear yet another burden on his shoulders. He was probably carrying a lot as it was, and you felt like it was unfair that he should carry your problems with him, too).

"I'm- I'm sorry," you said hoarsely. "For this whole thing. I should've just-"

"No. You shouldn't apologize, not for this," he reassured, "but thank you for being honest."

You nodded, blinking away the last of your tears.

"Please tell me if you need anything."

You chuckled, albeit pitifully. "Yeah, if you know how to magically erase all of my problems with a fairy wand or something."

"I'm being serious, y/n," he warned, but his lips betrayed him - their corners quirked up into a small smile.

"I'll be fine," you sniffed one last time, before standing up, at which he stood up with you. "I'll be okay."

He furrowed his eyebrows. "Are you sure?"

"Yeah, I am. I think, at least."

"Alright then."

He walked back to the table on which his book lay, and after retrieving it, he headed towards the door. Before he exited, however, he stole one last glance towards you, and cleared his throat.

"You'll tell me though, right?"

"About what?" you asked as you watered some plants on a windowsill.

"If you need anything."

You turned to face him, and your eyes widened in surprise. "Oh, you really meant that?"

"Of course."

"Well... I am rather short on Mora."

A glare from the man made you freeze, and then you threw up your hands like you were at gunpoint (because you pretty much were at that point).

"Just kidding!" you laughed awkwardly, and in response, his gaze softened. "But no, there's nothing. I think all that crying cleared my head up a little bit, though. Thank you, truly."

He nodded, another smile gracing his elegant features, and walked out into the cold night air.

++++

Day 3 of 31 of the yandere month May challenge. This yandere is a platonic yandere. SO STILL DARK FUCKING THEMES. Sorry this one is shorter than usual.

You want to see your family and leave Fei...she can't have that.

Also I am thinking of doing COMMISSIONS. Every 100 words is 1$. I'll do the people I have set out and I'm willing to do some men. If yall are interested talk to me in my asks.

Yandere!Fei Hargreeves ANGST

"You cant leave. I'm here to keep you safe. Why...why the hell can't you understand that!?"

You two are good friends, she values you as someone she can talk to. She feels safe in your arms, she feels warm, she feels comfortable.

While she is a sparrow and has a hard time being around you without the paparazzi. She loves just seeing you, just being around you. Sadly, though, when the world was going to shit. You wanted to leave, you wanted to go see your family.

You wanted to leave Fei in her time of need. You wanted to leave Fei when she needed you most. You can't do that, why would you do that? What's wrong with you?

You'd leave your best friend- your only friend, in her time of need? You truly are a bad person...but that doesn't matter. She'll fix you, she'll keep you safe. You need her, she can give you anything you want.

Of course...she'll have to get rid of a few obstacles. The obstacles are your family. She's smart, really fucking smart. She controls crows, so she of course has the mind of one. She takes good, good care of your family.

After "dealing" with your family she takes you to see them. You don't know the horrible things she's done, you'll never know. She wont let you.

You see their dead and assume someone killed them. You cry into Feis arms, crying and begging her to take you away from this horrible sight. She smiles happily and does as you ask.

Fei takes you back, back to Alphonso, back to Sloane, back to Ben. Back to your real friends, your real family. She brings you back to the people she believes truly love you.

For weeks you didn't know it was her, she was great at hiding it. Emphasis on the was. She did, at some point, slip up. That was the day it all came crumbling down, it all went to hell.

"Calm down. No, no, you need to calm down, you're going to hurt yourself."

That's what Fei told you when you found out. She slipped up, she was talking to Jayme about it, she was bragging about bringing you back. Back where you belong. She's proud of herself.

You walked in. You heard it all, she was talking too loudly, something she didn't usually do.

You slapped her and her glasses fell off. Her face always gave you a small scare, from the beginning, the then, to now. It's always scared you, you never mentioned it though. That would be rude. Although now, now you could hurl all the ugly words you wanted to at her.

You called Fei all sorts of hateful things. She she only smiles when you finally ran out of breath, you were shaking out of rage.

"Ah. You don't mean that, I mean, you probably do, but I don't care. You can mean it all you want, it doesn't mean I'm mad. No, I'm happy you grew a backbone."

You cried and tried pushing her away as she hugged you. She held you close, she said she wasn't angry, but you knew she was lying. When you went into her room all the birds were cawing at you in anger. She continued to tell you she wasn't mad...until you were alone.

"I'm not sorry for this."

She hurt you. Something she's never done before, she never intended to do it either. She heard your screams as the birds nipped and bit at your skin. She watched in fury, until she found herself calming down.

The birds went into their cages and she smiles. She bandages you up while you glare at her.

"Hate me all you want. I'm keeping you safe, you're my only real family. I'm not afraid to do this again...if it means you'll stay by my side."

She knows she's a monster in your eyes. Although she Hope's one day you see why she does this. Part of it is because she is a monster, she does get some enjoyment of seeing you cry. Only because you run to her, because you have nowhere else to run.

Please

Eli "hawk" moskowitz x reader

Request: ok! if you get too busy or don’t like the idea you don’t have to do it...but would it be possible for you to do a Miguel or Hawk imagine where the reader and him (either boy is either) get into a fight and they accidentally hit the reader cause of ✨karate✨and then they have to apologize and stuff and maybe it’s like...fluffy idk...if you don’t want to do it that’s fine! No pressure! <3

Warnings: language. Angst. And fluff at the end because I'm all soft for eli🥺

Tag: @klt123456

You stormed into your boyfriends bedroom slamming the door, face flushed with anger while you pace the room. Eli watched you with a cold hard stare, arms crossed as he huffs out a un-amused chuckle.

"shouldn't I be the one pissed? Considering you're the one who was hanging around that jerk!?" hawk growls, causing you to scoff and shake your head. "you was flirting with that - that asshole! All night!" he yells, walking closer to you.

You only roll your eyes and glare at him. Thankful his mother wasn't home to hear his loud yelling, "I wasn't flirting with him! I was hardly even talking to the guy!" you retort, voice raised as you stare at him, watching his anger grow. "and what words I did say to was about me and you Eli!" you tell the truth, for you told the random guy about eli and your relationship.

But the man who your boyfriend claimed you to be flirting with was insistent with his flirting toward you, one of the reasons you waved Eli over in the first place. But he was a stubborn hard headed hot head after he joined that karate class he always tells you about.

"then why the hell did he have his hands all over you? Why did you let him do that!?" eli yells stalking closer to you, his eye's alight with anger, rage rolling off him in burning waves. You actually felt a little intimidated by him and let your anger soften a little, trying to calm down.

"I didn't. That's what you're not understanding!" you spoke through gritted teeth. The man just slung a arm over your shoulder and started getting a little too friendly for your liking. Why you waved your boyfriend over.

"what you're not understanding is that you shouldn't have even talked to the asshole in the first place!" he exclaimed, clearly getting even angrier. You sigh deeply and shake your head.

"I'm going home until you calm down..." you say calmy, heading for the door until he graps your wrist and spins you around, hard blue eye's glaring down at you.

"you're not leaving until this is settled!" you huff out a frustrated breath, fed up with his attitude.

"there's nothing to settle Eli, not until you stop being a childish asshole" you said, venom dripping from your voice as you angrily pry his fingers from your wrist, in a attempt to leave. But when you done so he done some sort of move making you flip and land on his floor hard on your back, the wind knocked from your lungs. You stare up at your boyfriend with a frightened, betrayed look. This was not your Eli... Eli would never do something like this to you, at least you thought.

When you met his gaze, his blue eye's was wide with a horrified expression. He was quick to crouch down beside you, reaching for you. But you backed away, standing up and running out fthe door. You heard Eli yelling for you, pleading for you to talk... But you left his house. Tears swelling in your eye's.

You wasn't hurt, you pissed he'd do that, you was pissed at cobra Kai for corrupting your sweet shy Eli into an ignorant asshole who thought karate was the key to fixing everything. Like tonight at that stupid party he dragged you to, if your shy sweet Eli saw a man flirting with you, he'd take you home and calmy tell you what he was feeling, taking care of the situation calmy, he'd see you push the jerk away and cling to his side as you reassure him he was the only man for you.... But the new Eli... Hawk, he saw everything different, he saw the man wrap a arm around you and assumed you was madly in love with the stranger, he saw the chance to use his flashy new fighting skills and took it. Showing off his new self. You hated it.

A solid week went by with you ignoring Eli, not answering his calls or texts, distancing yourself from him at school or anywhere you saw him actually. You even had to ignore poor Miguel because he tried getting you to talk to Eli. But you didn't want to, not after what he done.

That's how you ended up walking home alone from school, bag slung over your shoulder as you kept your eyes glued to the sidewalk. But the sound of approaching footsteps caught your attention, you look behind you to see aisha. She walks beside you steadily. You sigh and already know what she's hear for....

"look, I have no idea what happened between you and hawk... But maybe you should try talking to him? He's really upset, he's even missing karate class" you look over at her as you stopped walking. That was a bit of shock, Eli skipping lessons like that.

"he's not been showing up for his lessons?" you ask, a curious brow lifted at her.

She nods, "he hasn't showed up for a week now, even sensei Lawrence is concerned about him, maybe you should call hawk, try working things out?" aisha told you. But you wasn't gonna forgive Eli that easily, just because he was skipping karate doesn't mean you'd forgotten what he done to you.

"maybe sensei Lawrence should give him a call, because I'm not letting Eli forget his mistake that easily" you grumbled, aisha sighs and follows you to your house.

"what did he even do? It can't be that bad!?" she said a little loudly as you got ahead of her. You stopped walking again, nearly home as you grip your backpack strap hard.

"he freaking body slammed me aisha! It's pretty bad" you state with frustration. Aisha's eyes widen as she catches up with you.

"why the hell did he do that?" she asks, starting to side with you on this one. You opened your mouth to answer her but no noise came out, you stared at your porch steps at where the familier man sat, his head resting in his hands as he bounced his knee, his anxiety getting the best of him.

You groan and March over to him, trying to ignore him as you head for the steps, but he stood up fastly and looks at you with big pleading eye's, his expression one of pain and regret. You felt your heart ache for him, for you remember this look on him all to well, the nights you spent holding him in your arms as kids words from school about the scar on his lip got to him...

You push those thoughts away and try to pass him, but he stops you gently, his shaky hand softly grasping your hand. You yank your hand from his grasp causing his heart to break right there, his eye's showing the defeated pained look that action caused.

"get out of my way hawk... Go home or whatever" you grumbled quietly while staring at him with a look over anger.

He sighs, a little frown on his face. He knew he messed up big time when you called him hawk, something you never called him, ever. "I'm sorry y/n, I'm so sorry for what I did. I didn't mean to do that... It was a reflex -

"don't go making excuses for practically body slamming me hawk, now move and get lost" you try and make him leave by putting up a angery facade. But it obviously wasn't working.

"please y/n! I'm sorry, what I did was stupid, how I was acting that night was stupid and nothing will ever make up for what I did, I know that but..." he sighs, looking down as his lip trembles. Pain embracing your heart at the sight, you hated seeing Eli cry...

"I can't leave without you y/n, I know that sounds cliché... But it's true, I didn't realize how enjoyable life was when you were in it... But when you left? When you're gone... It's miserable, a living hell because I can't stand not hearing you're voice or seeing you're face - I miss you y/n, so fucking much it's killing me not being near you... Please just give me a another chance " he spoke with tears slowly falling from his blue eye's. This was Eli, not hawk the big badass karate champ, but sweet, sympathetic, vulnerable Eli moskowitz. "please" he muttered.

You stare at him, eye's roaming his face. You look into his blue eye's, the eye's you've gazed in for nearly 3 years. You look over his adorable nose you've made a habit of kissing whenever he'd get stressed or frustrated over anything the action always melting his heart. Then lastly you look over the scar on his lip, the scar he hated with a passion. You've placed many kisses on that scar, telling him it wasn't seen as a flaw in your eye's, but a beauty mark, something that made him characteristic. All of that took place in the years before he went to Cobra Kai. The years you both was madly in love...

"eli... I'll never forget what happened that night, you acted like a total asshole, you overreacted over something stupid because you let anger and jealousy get the best of you, and you hurt me. Not only emotionally, but physically and that's something I'll never forget" you said with a through growing frustration. Eli's eye's already showing the way his heart was shattering at what he thought was you breaking up with him.

"but... That doesn't mean I'm just going to leave you, sure I may be angry but I'll never stop loving you Eli....but if you ever pull a stunt like that one more time... I won't be as forgiving." you say while giving him a serious look.

Hope fulls his eye's while he gives you a ghost of a smile. "it will never happen again, I swear y/n I'll never let no one hurt you, not even myself" he muttered. You sigh and walk closer to him. Delicately cupping his cheeks as you look up into his eyes, you then lean in and kiss his nose. His eyes fluttering closed as he let's a breath escape his lips.

"I love you Eli, I'll always love you and only you" you murmur as a smile tugs at your lips. His eye's open again as he smiles down at you.

"I'll always love you too babe, I'm sorry for being such an asshole...." he looks down as his smile turns to a frown. You make him look up at you by tilting his head up.

"let's put it behind us Eli, there's no point on dwelling in the past when there's a future ahead of us" you say, knowing guilt was eating away at him for what he done. And sure, you was still bothered by what he done... You knew he had alcohol in his system and wasn't thinking straight. And like he said, you knew it was a reflex.... Why hold one mistake on the man?

"okay..." he muttered with a smile, you smiled back and kissed the scar on his lip. He melts in your touch, while you both just stood there.

And as months went by, Eli stayed True to his word. He didn't let anyone hurt you, not even himself. He showed others hawk when you wasn't around, but when you was by his side. He was the shy sweet Eli you had fallen in love with.

hello guys! this wasn't a request, but it is a small gift for @kwnblack ! i decided to make a third and final part for the two previous Zeke scenarios i wrote! i hope you enjoy :).

Zeke x Fem!Reader: I Promise

Warnings: slight manga spoilers and slight angst

Part 1 Part 2

It had been about a month or so since Zeke had his last encounter with (Y/N). After that night, he left the island, and (Y/N) had no idea. She woke up the next morning, and notice he was gone. It confused her that day. Where the hell did he go?

She spent that whole day after searching for him. She went around Marley, but she never found him.

As the weeks went on, (Y/N) began to not feel like herself. She felt sick all the time, and she was very tired. She always blamed it on stress, but a few of her friends were concerned with her behavior. They didn't like the way she was acting. (Y/N) never looked good either.

After some arguments with friends, she decided to just finally go see the doctor. She explained to the doctor about her symptoms, he was concerned with how sick she was, and how she was fatigued most of the time.

"I'm going to run a few tests (Y/N), we should figure out what's going on" he said.

(Y/N) had multiple tests run on her, and what the doctor told her was shocking.

"Congratulations! Your expecting a baby"

Those words made her whole world stop.

She was pregnant? She never imagined in her entire life she would get pregnant, even with how young she was. (Y/N) knew who the dad was, it was Zeke for sure. She was the only man she was intimate with, but where was he?

The doctor explained her options. He explained that if she wanted to terminate it he could, but she insisted that she wanted to keep the baby. (Y/N) didn't want to let the opportunity slide, so she decided to keep it.

Her friends were extremely supportive of her and the baby. Thing was, they weren't exactly happy with who the dad was. They all shamed Zeke for leaving, in a way, her friends made it seem like Zeke only wanted to have sex with her. Nothing more than a one-night stand.

This made (Y/N) extremely emotional.

Many questions ran through her head during that month. Did Zeke only want her for one thing and one thing only? Did he lie about how he felt about her? So many questions with little answers.

Zeke on the other hand, had no idea she was pregnant. The time that they met fell at an unfortunate time, he had to head back to Paradis to obtain Eren. (Y/N) had no idea about these plans, and it sort of slipped Zeke's mind. His intention was to never leave her like that, he didn't have a choice.

She had some support from her best friend Mia (random name). Mia helped a lot with anything that she needed, and (Y/N) was extremely grateful for her. Without Mia, (Y/N) probably would have been so lonely.

"Imagine if it's a girl (Y/N)! A little you running around" Mia said.

Mia had been more excited than (Y/N) was for this baby. She dreamt about her best friend having a baby, and becoming an aunt or a God-parent.

As much as (Y/N) was excited, she couldn't help but feel those dark thoughts sometimes. She always thinks about Zeke, and she feels so much sadness run through her whenever she does.

"Are you thinking about him again?" Mia asked and looked at her.

(Y/N) nodded. "No! I'm fine, I just feel really moody right now. This pregnancy has made my hormones go all over the place" she replied and tried to seem convincing.

Mia had to deal with so much when it came to her best friend being pregnant. The mood swings, cravings, constantly peeing, and constant sleep. (Y/N) was thankful though, without Mia, she would have been stressed out to the max.

"I'll rip his damn head off (Y/N). You know I'm capable of that" she said and looked at her friend.

(Y/N) chuckled. "You won't need to do that. I think I want to nap being honest, so you can go if you'd like" she said and smiled.

Mia stood up. "Alright, well you know where I'm at if you need me" she said and made her way towards the door.

She watched as Mia exited. (Y/N) felt a sad wave hit her all at once, the emotions she felt were the usual. She felt tears fall down her cheeks as she thought about Zeke again. Was she really just a one-night stand to him? A woman who he got in bed just for one night?

(Y/N) went to her bed and began to sob. Her emotions running wild, and coming out once again. She's had countless days where she'd cry about it, who could blame her? The woman was pregnant and all she had was her friends.

All she had was the memory of him.

As the weeks went on, she began to feel a bit better. She actually put on a genuine smile, and she wasn't faking it. Her friends told her to not stress, it wasn't good for the baby. She had to take that in. (Y/N) was feeling better about herself, she went out with Mia and looked at different baby items that would be needed.

She had gotten a few items. (Y/N) was quite prepared for her baby, and she was very careful. Even being only about 2 or 3 months along.

But she was in for quite the situation.

(Y/N) stood looking outside her window. It was a warm and sunny day, she missed the summer breeze. It always reminded her of how beautiful the world was. She noticed some people beginning to run in the same direction.

"They're back!"

"Do you think they got him?"

(Y/N) was confused as to who was being talked about. She began to follow the people, and she noticed a pretty large crowd formed.

She noticed Mia was there. "What's going on?" (Y/N) asked.

She looked back at her. "I'm not sure... I'm just as curious as you are" Mia replied.

That's when she felt time stop.

Zeke was standing there with Reiner badly wounded. What the hell happened? As much as she wanted to run up to him, she knew she couldn't. Reiner and Zeke looked horrible.

"Where is Eren!?"

"Yeah! You promised to bring back the founding titan!"

Zeke just stood there quiet. The mission was a failure. Bertholdt was dead, and Paradis now had his power.

His eyes scanned the area as he noticed a familiar (h/c) haired girl standing there. (Y/N). Zeke noticed how upset she looked, he wasn't sure why, but he wanted to know.

"Let's go (Y/N)" Mia said and grabbed her arm.

She lead her away from the crowd. "Mia, what the hell happened? Who is Eren? What do they want with him?" she asked.

Mia sighed. "Couldn't tell you, all I heard was that they went with each other" she replied. "I guess we know where Zeke went after all this time..." she added.

(Y/N) looked down and stood by her friend. She didn't want to face him right now, it would be too much for her.

Zeke had been taken to the infirmary along with Reiner. Both were injured and needed to be checked on.

"Your injuries are minor, but it'll take you awhile to heal.." the nurse said and looked at Zeke.

He nodded. "May I request a visitor?" he asked.

The nurse furrowed her brows. "Are you sure about that? I can get someone to do that" she asked.

Zeke ran a hand through his hair. "Yes I'm sure, please get me (Y/N) (L/N) please" he replied.

She nodded. "Very well, I'll be right back" she said and exited the room.

Zeke waited as his heart began to race, he wanted to explain everything to her about the mission. She never knew about it, he didn't want her to worry that day, so he kept what he was doing out of it.

"Zeke?" The nurse said and entered the room.

He looked up and noticed she wasn't with the nurse. "Where is she?" he asked.

She sighed. "I'm not sure why but (Y/N) refused to see you. I can't force her, I'm sorry" she replied.

What the hell was up with her? She was avoiding him now? He knew leaving her so fast was kind of not a good idea. Zeke needed to talk to her as soon as possible.

Three days had gone by, and he hadn't seen (Y/N) around Marley. She had been a ghost. He wasn't sure where she could be, but he wanted to know.

(Y/N) did her best to avoid him. She did her shopping at odd hours, or she would make Mia do things for her. Mia completely understood, but she didn't want her to run away forever.

Mia sat in a bar by herself. She wanted (Y/N) to come for some company, but she was having morning sickness, so that was a huge no.

She noticed Pieck enter the bar. She had her crutch with her, since she spent so much time in her titan form, she forgot how to actually walk like a human.

"You look like you've seen better days" Pieck said and sat next to her.

Mia looked over. "Same to you" she replied and took a sip of her drink.

Pieck never knew Mia well. "Well.. when your mission becomes a total failure, you feel like shit so" she said and shrugged.

Mia laughed a little. "Hm... it can't be as bad as your best friend being a pregnant hormonal mess" she said.

The dark haired girl nodded. "Ah pregnancy huh? Why bring a child into this world" she said and leaned against the table.

"Not sure but it happened, (Y/N) deserves better though" Mia said and shrugged.

Pieck stopped. (Y/N)? She had heard Zeke talking about her during the mission, and pretty recently. Was that the girl he was trying to speak to? She heard his constant rant about this woman ignoring him.

"Excuse me.. I need to leave" Pieck said and began to make her way to find Zeke.

Mia found it odd how quickly the girl left. She shrugged and kept drinking. Pieck rushed as quickly as she could to find him.

"Zeke!" she yelled as she saw him talking with Reiner.

He furrowed his brows noticing her quick pace. "Something wrong Pieck?" he asked.

She looked at him. "Do you know (Y/N)?" she asked.

Zeke looked at Reiner and back at Pieck. "Yes... why?" he asked.

She nodded. "Did you know she was pregnant?" she asked.

His mind totally stopped when those words came out of Pieck. She was pregnant!? Maybe that's why she was avoiding him.

"I had no idea... excuse me, I need to go" Zeke said and began to make his way to her house.

(Y/N) sat in her home exhausted. Her morning sickness was horrible, so she spent most of the day in her bed and napping. She heard a knock at her front door. She assumed that it was Mia.

"Mia I-" she opened the door and saw Zeke standing there.

She stood there for a moment in shock. "(Y/N)... can we talk please?" he asked.

She sighed. "Come in.." she replied and moved so he could come in.

Zeke entered her home and watched as she shut the door. "Why didn't you tell me?" he asked.

She furrowed her brows. "About what? What is there to talk about!?" she asked.

He rolled his eyes. "That you're pregnant!? What else?!" he replied.

Silence flooded the room between the two. "So you do know.." she said and sat down on her couch.

"I don't understand why you never told me. I've been here for days" he said.

She felt anger rushing through her. "Tell you? Why would I? You left me that day. You left me after we had SEX Zeke! You know how that made me feel? You made me feel like I was a one-night stand. I never knew you were going to leave like that" she yelled.

Zeke looked at her. "I'm sorry (Y/N). I should have told you that I had to go, I didn't want to worry you. Everything was at the wrong time" he replied.

She crossed her arms and shook her head. "You worried me 10x more when you left me that day, again" she said.

He felt horrible in the moment. "I know... I wanted to tell you" he said.

(Y/N) ran a hand down to her belly which was slowly getting bigger. "So why are you here?" she asked.

He looked up confused. "What? That's a stupid question. I'm here because I know I got you pregnant, who the fuck do you think I am (Y/N)? Some guy who bangs a girl, gets them pregnant, and then leaves? I care about you that's why I'm here. I want to be here for OUR child. If I didn't give a shit, I wouldn't have bothered showing up here" he replied.

She fell silent as he spoke, she didn't know what to say. "I'm about 3 months.." she said and looked down.

Zeke nodded and stood up. "I'm sorry for leaving you that day. Please forgive me" he said and held her hand.

She bit her lip and looked around. "I can forgive you Zeke, but how do I know you're gonna leave again?" she asked.

"I'll be more honest with you. This mission came fast and there wasn't much I could do to stop it" he replied.

(Y/N) nodded. "I see..." she said and looked at him.

He ran his hand down to her belly. "May I?" he asked.

She shook her head. "Yes" she replied and lifted her shirt a bit.

Zeke looked at how big her belly had gotten, it wasn't huge, but it was noticeable that she was bigger. He lied his head on her belly, and pulled her hips closer to him. The sight alone made her heart flutter. She ran her fingers through his hair.

"I can't wait to meet them, I don't have much time left" he said and looked down.

She nodded. "What do you mean?" she asked and furrowed her brows.

Zeke felt a bit emotional in the moment. "Curse of Ymir remember? I don't have much time left (Y/N).. I want to make it worth it for you and them" he said and stood up.

She noticed the tears in his eyes. "Zeke.. don't worry. I'll make sure it's worth it for you and the baby" she said and smiled a bit.

He wiped his eyes a bit. "I'd love that (Y/N), I promise I won't leave you ever again" he replied and hugged her.

She put her head on his chest. "Promise?" she asked.

He smiled. "I promise" he replied.

Fickle Love (Akaashi x Reader x Bokuto)

A/N: So this was supposed to be for Akaashi's birthday...whoops. But its here now lmao ngl I just kinda wrote with no idea in mind and this is what ended happening so yeah. Hope you enjoy and happy late birthday to Akaashi 💞

Details: 7.8 pages 2,758 words

Date: December 8th, 2020

Warnings: Mentions of poly relationships I guess, angst if you squint, Gn! Reader not really a warning but I didn't know where else to put it

Theme: Akaashi wasn't the best when it came to love. Having a habit of ignoring you and burying himself in work. Leading you to turn to Bokuto which leads to some revelations and a question for Akaashi.

Love was a fickle thing Akaashi knew. People fell in and out of love all the time so he never trusted love. He didn't want love he wanted to avoid it. Avoid the heartbreak he was positive would follow. But instead he met you a bright-eyed student in his class. It took almost nothing for you to mesh yourself into his life completely and making yourself comfortable like you belonged there.

It took even less time for you to weasel your way into his heart and make yourself comfortable. Only a year after you'd met and he asked you out deciding that love may not have been as fickle as he thought.

Four years later and he knew he had been wrong love was indeed fickle and his proof was in the sight across the street from him. There you stood hands clasped around Bokuto's as he kissed your cheek. He waved before running off and Akaashi rushed home preparing for the worst.

A few hours later you slipped through the door "Keiji? I'm home!" You called hearing the soft pads of feet come up to you. Love was fickle he knew you were going to lie when he asked his next question "Hey Y/n. What did you do today?" You suprised him though. Only after you'd gotten over the shock of being called Y/n and not darling.

"I went to lunch with Bokuto today," You said happily slipping off your coat and hanging it up. He certainly didn't expect you to be honest about what you did today. He loosened up a tad bit in response "Oh? Why?" You laughed at his question "Bo needs contact with us you know that. But you haven't been answering his calls so we went shopping and I filled him in on how you were. Afterwards I treated him to lunch as a thank you," You smiled up at him eyes bright with nothing hidden.

"Yeah? Did you guys hold hands so he wouldn't lose you?" He joked and you shook your head "He grabbed my hands at the end of lunch because I promised him I'd bring you next time," you had laughed remembering the incident. Relief flooded him then no of course you weren't cheating on him that'd be insane. You were as loyal as Bokuto was plus he couldn't keep a secret to save his life and neither could you. He relaxed as he realized how wrong he was to assume something.

"Im sorry," He said suddenly while you tilted your head in confusion. "What for?" You had asked before Akaashi leaned down and pressed a kiss to your forehead. "I forgot to give you your welcome home kiss," He rolled off casually hiding the fear he'd felt earlier. This fear had only continued to grow as the days went on but it was his fault anyway.

_______________________________________________________

"Keiji are you free today?" "No I'm busy," "Oh...Okay," 

"Keiji we haven't gone on a date in weeks!" "Im not stopping you from going out somewhere," "I want to go out with you though,"

"Keiji-" "Im busy Y/n,"

Two weeks this cycle continued as you walked to Akaashi's at home office. Two taps against the door and you opened it "Kei-" His eyes snapped up frustration was on his face but he took a breath before it faded. "What?" You sighed turning to leave again "...Im going out to lunch with Kotaro again. He says hi by the way," You left the room quickly and Akaashi blinked 'Kotaro?' Surely you meant Bokuto but there was no way you two were on a first name basis it'd only been a few days since the last lunch.

His eyes landed on the calender and he froze what had only been a few days to him was actually two weeks but still too short for a first name basis. You'd only know Bokuto for a few months and he'd known the male for years and still never used his first name.

He sighed returning to his work. He'd question you when you got back from lunch he didn't have the time to right now. Nor did he know your location so going to find you was like a needle in a haystack. A very big bustling city of a haystack and the needle being you with a slightly bigger needle in the shape of a volleyball player next to you.

He continued work for a few hours before his office door was thrown open. He expected many things when he looked up but he didn't expect Bokuto. But what got him was the fact that Bokuto was furious it was a look he'd never seen before on him. The glare he had on his face was enough to make Akaashi freeze. 

He knew Bokuto was typically happy like a dog but right now he felt fearful since now he staring down an angry German Shepard who was defending their owner. It was silent for a long moment before Bokuto spoke. "What the fuck is wrong with you?" Akaashi felt his blood turn to ice at the tone Bokuto used.

"W-what?" He cursed silently at his own stutter Bokuto would latch onto the weakness he showed. "Whats today Akaashi?" Bokuto had asked in that same icy tone. It was so razor sharp and cold that Akaashi was convinced the room cooled and ten degrees.

"...Its December 1st Bokuto-san," He elected to answer the question instead of ask why Bokuto didn't call him Keiji. Based on the mood Bokuto was displaying he didn't expect to be called Keiji. However supplying the date only seemed to rile him up more as his glare sharpened.

Akaashi shivered involuntarily at it "Are you forgetting something?" He barked out and it was then that Akaashi realized Bokuto hadn't blinked yet. "No," he was confident in the answer. Your birthday wasn't until b/d and his was in four days. Bokutos had already passed but said male wouldn't have been mad at him. Sad maybe but not mad.

"Oh really? Then tell me why Y/n is at my place crying because you forgot that today is your anniversary," Bokuto had stepped towards him in anger and Akaashi took in involuntarily step back in fear. "They're at your place?" Akaashi asked and Bokutos jaw clenched.

"Yeah. And they are going to stay there until you sort yourself out," Bokuto growled turning and slamming the door closed with enough force to crack it. Akaashi stood frozen for a few extra moments trying to regain his composure after being afraid. He shook his head as he processed Bokuto's last sentence.

No you'd always come back to him, even if a fight had broken out between him and you, you would always come back. You had to come back he was your fiancé and the wedding was going to be in the upcoming w/f/s/s so he continued to work shaking off his encounter with Bokuto that had manage to worm a tiny bit of fear back into his heart.

__________________________________________________

Akaashi didn't fully leave his office again until December 5th. He'd left it plenty of times before then but only for something quick eat or the bathroom or something to drink. In these moments he never bothered to look around the place but now on his birthday he did.

He expected to be greeted by your sparkling voice like you had done for the past four years but instead the house was silent. "Y/n?" He called out walking around the house was still perfectly clean. The last time he could recall hearing you was on the first with the vacuum running and the patter of your feet running around.

Since then he realizes the house had been silent except for his movements. As he walked into the dining room something glinted on the table in the early morning light. When he turned to look he froze there was your engagement ring. The thin band of silver sat there almost mockingly on a yellow sticky note.

He picked up the note and written on it were a few simple words. 'They aren't coming home - Bokuto' his brain filled in the missing words Bokuto had told him a few days ago "Not until I fix myself," he mumbled thumbing at the sticky in his hands. He knew what Bokuto meant he'd been borderline ignoring you for weeks to work.

Thoughts of your anniversary had left his mind but he didn't think it was that bad until right now. Forgetting had been the final nail in the coffin for you but he still had a chance. You weren't gone forever just temporarily misplaced. He rushed to shower and go buy flowers his brain running a mile a minute trying to figure out how to get you back and apologize.

He felt nervous and he was unsure of why until he remembered where you had taken up residence. Bokuto had never been scary to him, just a bright ball of happiness but the fear Bokuto had instilled in him a few days ago had lingered, and he was about to walk right into the lion's den.

__________________________________________________

He couldn't see you as he approached the door. Maybe you were tucked away upstairs or in a place the windows didn't show but he'd seen Bokuto. The male was pacing clearly on edge and definitely dangerous but Akaashi would have to face him sooner or later so with a shaking hand he knocked.

Only half a second later the door swung open and Bokuto stood there mouth set in a hard line. Akaashi fought to supress the shiver that wanted to trail up his spine. "Is Y/n here?" He asked and once again cursed himself for sounding so meek. It was just Bokuto he wouldn't hurt him the man couldn't even hurt a fly! Although that sentiment didn't hold much when he felt like he was staring down the loaded barrel of a gun.

"Yes," Bokuto answered after a few beats of silence. His eyes raked over Akaashi's form judging him and seeing if he was ready to have Y/n back. "Can I see them? I'd like to talk," He was definitely playing with fire when Bokuto looked back up at his eyes. "About what?" He asked lowly Akaashi noted that Bokuto was staying quiet which meant you had to be downstairs. "I'd like to apologize for ignoring them and forgetting our anniversary," Bokuto nodded once before swinging the door closed.

He blinked in mild suprise "Bo-Bokuto-san?" He questioned wondering where he went wrong that warranted the door being closed. He was about to knock again when the door opened revealing you. Your h/c hair was slightly messy and e/c eyes half lidded in sleep.

What Akaashi didn't like was the MSBY jersey that swallowed you figure. The number 12 emblazoned on the front and long enough to cover your thighs. He couldn't tell if you were wearing pants but he hoped you did. You never walked around his house like this unless it was after a fun night but he couldn't assume things. Not now and he especially couldn't accuse you of cheating when Bokuto was on the staircase right behind you.

He could see that the golden eyed male was poised to attack when the conversation would start heading south. You tilted your head in confusion "Hello Akaashi," You had mumbled and he did flinch then. No pet names or his first name no, you had decided on formal. "Hi darling," He whispered the pet name but you merely shook your head.

"Why are you here?" The genuine confusion on your face made Akaashi feel a lot worse about everything. "Im here to apologize and seeing as its my birthday id like my present from you to be going on one date with me," He said slowly "Please," was tacked on as an afterthought. You turned your head eyes meeting Bokuto's and Akaashi hated the jealousy that crawled up his spine when his eyes softened.

"Um actually Akaashi I wanted to talk to you about something," Your hands had balled into fists tightly gripping the hem of the shirt you wore. A nervous habit you had whenever something scared you. He felt his heart drop in response to those words and you shook your head. "No no! It's nothing bad- well I guess that depends on how you feel about it," You were quick to try and sooth him and Akaashis heart swelled at the fact that right now even if you weren't getting along you still worried about him.

He didn't even realize you had led him inside until he was on the couch. His eyes trailed over you figure as you sat across from him. The shirt rode up enough exposing part of your thigh and Akaashi could see the hem of a pair of shorts. They followed their path until his eyes rested on the new gold band around your ring finger. It was decorated in a series of small gems that were the same blue as his eyes and he took a deep breath.

"What is it?" He lightly questioned when the silence began suffocating him. Bokuto was behind him somewhere he felt the stare being burned into his back. The second this conversation possibly turned south Bokuto was ready to jump in. "Well...I was wondering how you felt about the two of us becoming um...three of us?" You looked down afterwards hands nervously ringing together.

"...three of us?" He wanted more clarification were you implying a kid or something else? You hummed meeting his eyes before they flickered to the male that was behind him 'oh' it pieced itself together then. You were implying a poly relationship with him and Bokuto. He must have been quiet for too long since your hands began rubbing at your sides.

He scrambled for an answer he knew he was unbothered by it but this was...The two of you were only a few months away from getting married and you wanted to add Bokuto into the mix? Now of all times? He took a shuttering breath as he thought.

"Well...I guess I have to call the restaurant and tell them to change the reservation for three people then," he offered a small smile and your head whipped up. "Really?" You whispered and he could only supply a nod. 

"Yeah now when I'm busy with work the both of you can harass me into taking a break," it was a poor attempt at a joke but you had laughed anyway. He heard a chuckle from behind him as well and he breathed out a sigh of relief. "Keiji are you sure? I don't wanna make you uncomfortable or anything...," you trailed off and he smiled "im sure but are you sure about Bokuto? Hes a little chaotic," He asked "Hey!" Bokuto had an immediate reaction to the accusation.

You laughed reaching out and taking his hand "So is it a fancy dinner place?" You asked as Bokuto came over to take your free hand. He watched your thumb move back and forth across Bokutos hand a comforting gesture and he noticed the minute shake of Bokuto's hand. Unconsciously he reached out with his free hand and took Bokuto's which seemed to startle him slightly as wide gold eyes met his.

Akaashi gave a light squeeze and Bokuto settled with a sigh. "Its the restaurant I originally proposed at so yeah I'd go with fancy," he answered after a second. "You're making me get dressed up for your birthday dinner? Despicable really," you dramatically sighed and he found himself laughing. "Well I suppose we don't have to go since you've already given me the best present I could ask for today," He smiled tilting his head to the side and looking at Bokuto who was sitting cross-legged on the floor with a look of concern on his face.

"You alright Bo?" He looked up at the unfamiliar nickname eyes meeting Akaashi's once again. "M'fine just...I don't own a suit," He said quietly. The silence that stretched afterwards for a long moment before you broke it. "Kotaro what do you mean you don't own a suit you're a professional athlete!" "It wasn't an issue until now!" He shouted back love was fickle yes but as he watched you and Bokuto interact he knew

It was fickle but he wouldn't trade it in for anything.

Alright, this is gonna be tough because I desperately want to say so much for the game's sake and my own, but it's just so much.

At least the playthrough as a whole exists to show a lot of those things, and there's no shame in some of the impacts the game had for myself going unsaid :)

LONG POST INCOMING, NO 'READ MORE' BECAUSE IT'S RELEVANT TO THE POST AND NOT AN AFTER-THOUGHT

CLICK 'J' ON YOUR KEYBOARD TO SKIP. (Sorry mobile users)

8:48 - Do you have any idea how good a step forward it felt to smash the repressing bulb?

9:50 - So I'll get ahead of myself because this fight shows a lot of the visuals that play into this: Something being the manifestation of guilt for Mari is so incredibly visualized.

Between the base 'Something' being extremely close to the shadow she cast and including the one visible eye that bore down on Sunny and Basil after the hanging, to the stairs incorporating into the design.

The seaweed and spider are more general anxieties though they do circle back to Mari since she saved Sunny, but those two forms don't feel as directly related as the stairs (heights) and base 'Something' forms and what they represent for his repressed guilt.

Could be wrong ;) Tell me what you saw in the forms of 'Something' if you'd like to expand on them :)

12:39 - Just to prove the point before you get to fully see the truth- Something morphs into the figure of Mari hanging. It doesn't fully demonstrate the "eye" aspect yet, but still I just wanted to say kudos on the way 'Something' is shown visually. Formless for a reason, and that form becomes more defined as you understand what it is, exceptional damn thing.

15:43 - Basil's part in all of this makes me so damn sad. Plenty to say later (obviously), but he harbors so much guilt, wants forgiveness so much, and is so (not shown yet) desperate to believe in Sunny's innocence while knowing but not comprehending the truth. The fact he harbors his own 'Something' due to the guilt of all this is heartbreaking, these kids endured a hell no one should. Losing someone so important to you and harboring the guilt and fault of it when nothing of the sort was intended. A childish fight with raised emotions got out of hand and all this came of it.

Hell.

16:30 - I absolutely adore how the photo album is used for this reveal.

Absolutely incredible execution that's specific to this story and its characters and makes piecing (literally) this together tense and grim.

22:27 - I NEVER SPOKE TO OR INTERACTED WITH THE THING IN THE CENTER OF THIS ROOM AND I'M A NORMAL AMOUNT OF UPSET ABOUT THAT >:( lol

29:41 - Okay.

So this reveal as a whole is so unbelievably well paced and incredibly hard hitting.

All game long there's a weight of having lost Mari. Repeatedly it's told that she killed herself and no one can understand why and everyone (MYSELF THE PLAYER INCLUDED) is looking for meaning in little moments, seeking out hints that maybe she was suffering or depressed or this or that.

And while that has gone on FOR THE ENTIRE GAME there has also been this uneasy weight surrounding Sunny/Omori. Visions of Mari twisted and deformed into phantoms of horror.

For the most part I assumed it was just him coping with having lost his sister and maybe a dialogue on how when she was alive he was in her shadow (in his mind) and now that she's gone he remains there?

That was the best I could figure, more or less. But it continued to seem more and more malicious in design and MUCH more 'heavy' in how it's presented as a shadow behind Omori/Sunny throughout his adventure and life.

The weight and 'overshadowed' looks of the scenes felt more and more foreboding and less like a simpler "I'm living in her shadow" story, but I couldn't figure out what it was.

Then these pictures come out and piece things together.

The final result:

Sunny and Mari fighting. (Context appears to be his growing disdain towards playing. It's stated he loved playing, but it's also shown that he begins to dislike how much Mari is dragged away for classes and the like up to and including playing. So my read was that Sunny was upset that their fleeting time together was dedicated to the recital and broke his violin in an emotional blur and the fight occurred.

Alternatively it was accidentally broken and both of their emotions were running high as it happened)

Mari falling to her death.

Sunny and Basil carrying her upstairs and tending to her.

Sunny breaking down as it sinks in.

The visions having Basil say "It's going to be okay" by the bedside. (I perceive that as a memory of what Basil was saying as he tried to manage his emotions during the event)

Sunny and Basil carrying her back downstairs and to the backyard.

The makeshift noose.

And finally the sight that burned itself into Sunny's eyes of her hanging after it was all said and done.

Just holy shit to it all in how it's revealed and handled.

Stories have twists all the time, and I ain't gonna make some bold claim like "Most unpredictable!" "Best twist!" "What a twist!" or whatever, though that'd be funny.

I just want to say this twist worked BEFORE the reveal as a foreboding sense of unease and curiosity- it lent itself to intentionally vague and easily misconstrued explanations, basically- instead of it outright misleading you beyond the characters that believe the lie repeating the lie, it allowed you to mislead yourself.

It did the twist the right way! And well! YOU trick YOURSELF! The people repeating the lie are being lied to or have motivation to repeat the lie! The GAME isn't lying (as so many twists handle it) the game is giving the world reason to mislead and allowing you to be mislead!

Now am I yelling affirmations for the way things SHOULD ALWAYS BE! YES! BUT THAT'S BECAUSE IT'S NOT AS NORMAL AS IT SHOULD BE! lol

31:40 - All the "You will really miss them"s hurt :(

33:25 - Right out the gate, a spoiler for what isn't here:

I looked up the alternate endings of the neutral route and my heart hurts to know Sunny doesn't stick around and Basil dies :(

34:00 - BASIL BEING OVERWHELMED WITH DENIAL AND GUILT AS HE ATTEMPTS TO MENTALLY PROTECT HIS VIEW OF WHO HIS FRIEND IS BY INVENTING A SECOND PARTY THAT DID THIS IS SO FUCKING REAL AND AMAZINGLY DONE.

And it explains the name behind the 'Something'.

'Something' behind you did it. There's 'Something' behind you, isn't there.

'Something' all around us, that potentially being the truth comin' in.

When 'Something' ruined my photos, Basil repressing protecting Sunny by destroying the proof.

Just expertly done.

'Something' being repression of the memory and impending guilt. Dannnng.

36:26 - It's 24 hours after I beat the game as I type all this so here's a gag.

Here's the part where Basil beats some sense into his friend, because after this Sunny gets knocked out and wakes up 200% improved and ready to save Basil from his own guilt by releasing them both from the secret.

So basically Kel dragged us out of bed, then a couple days later Basil beats us up, and that's how Sunny gets better :^) Game Over.

38:46 - This fight made me feel utterly terrible, a highlight being the energy bar saying "Everything is going to be okay".

or at 40:17 - when Basil pokes out Sunny's eye and the screen does this? That's an underutilized but always awesome visual.

41:12 - I THOUGHT I WAS DEAD AT THIS POINT :)

Because just before entering Basil's home on this night you see his Grandma's ghost here. So seeing Sunny here told me "WELL. YOU FUCKED UP!"

42:25 - Like I said, beat some sense into Sunny.

Here's the mental side of things where Basil's beatin' told Sunny to go remember the good times and confront his inner self and I'm being partially facetious because there's plenty to say about what's coming up.

43:15 - Goosebumps every time due to the sincerity and hope of this.

43:40 - Hug for anyone needing that.

51:11 - I could cry again and I just might before this post is done being put together.

This accident was never meant to be.

55:09 - Timestamp is arbitrary, I won't go over every flashback but I do want to say what a beautiful way to use these photos. To relive the memories? To find the strength to overcome and all that? After all these years of suppressing memories? DANNNG I love this game.

1:04:09 - I stepped in poop.

1:04:15 - Barefooted.

1:04:22 - I embraced my failure.

1:12:00 - The violin.

1:13:00 - "The anxious feeling-" "They believed in you" "No matter what you didn't want to disappoint them" I'm filled with love and gonna cry about it.

1:14:00 - So an important theme in the game, as if it has just one, is Sunny suppressing emotions and demonizing himself.

Obviously the ending shows him breaking free from both but I think it's important as hell to look at how he builds up to being able to.

After all the dark moments show him as a bloodied monster, demonstrate a perceived lack of remorse for what he's done (as in he sees himself so poorly that he says "I must not have felt bad about it, I'm a monster", not that he actually doesn't feel bad about it, that he thinks he shouldn't because he's bad), have him stab dream Basil to protect his repression of the memory, the build up to breaking free from that is him remembering the good in him through the lens of his friends.

Both in the real world and in revisiting the memories within the photos.

He hears about the good in himself that he has pretended isn't there and finds the power to overcome this deadened shell he's made.

He learns how to forgive himself by finally remembering he's worthy of forgiveness and is more than his mistake, that even the person he grievously harmed would want him to forgive himself and would understand the mistake didn't define him.

1:15:15 - Just because you did something bad doesn't make you bad, to put it more eloquently than my rambles. He had to learn that.

1:19:20 - I've done this fight 4 times.

You may be wondering why 4 times, it ain't like I replayed the game a ton or anything.

The short of it is:

1) For the good ending :)

2) To see what happens if you go "up" in the hospital- it's a dead end- I assumed it'd be a bad ending. So I got the good ending again :)

3) For the bad ending.

4) FOR THE GOOD ENDING TO WIPE THE HORRIBLE FEELING IN THE PIT OF MY STOMACH AWAY FROM THE BAD ENDING :)

In doing so I did get one layer deeper on the BG of Omori in the fight, here it is:

And I learned on the fourth run that the fight is simpler than I gave it credit lol, Cherish refills your juice, so there is no reason to use Encore. You can get to the end (and deeper more easily) by just using the triple attack and Cherish and Calm down when necessary.

1:29:00 - A summary of the fight is that it's extremely impactful emotionally, but very obviously isn't a "Fun fight". It's great mechanically and story wise for what it's trying to do :)

I'll just say it here: I'm surprised there wasn't an end-game "Omori" fight, you know, in dream world? Because combat is SO good in this. I am lead to believe that the Omori route where you never go outside in the real world has more bosses and zones and would fill what I just implied I wanted- but you're also railroaded into the Neutral endings which are both sad :(

And honestly? That makes sense and I applaud the decision :) Embracing the fantasy world for more 'fights' isn't exactly the path to recovery. Also and I know someone will be bothered I say this because *I'm* bothered I'm saying this- it makes sense since a big predecessor did the same thing lol.

Undertale Genocide has new bosses and a harder end game challenge (Sans) while being the worse ending, while the good ending has a flashy and story/emotionally impactful final fight that isn't as challenging because challenge isn't the point of the morals being explored.

I just bring it up because it's interesting, has a parallel, and after fighting Omori 4 times I really REALLY wanted to do an end-game fight in Dream World.

1:30:00 - forgive me as I cry again. goosebumps and more.

OH NO~!

DRAT!

So I use a cheap video editor and I use the free format of it which limits to 720p and I didn't think twice of it.

I recorded at max, but downgraded after editing.

At 720p you can't see the detail that made me break down crying!

At 1:31:55 Sunny's eyes go wider as he sees Mari as they finally get to experience the duet in this dream state (White Egret Orchid, this is real and happening, I'm taking this to my grave :'( ) he sees her smile and that smile made me break down, but in the 720 it's blurry :(

That's on me, I could have posted the scene raw in HQ but I didn't know it'd compress just enough to be invisible :(

still. that duet scene can make me cry on command. just because of that alone, but also the entire thing.

1:33:42 - Sunny breaks from his shell and feels his emotions again.

1:37:07 - I wish every game would end with a mirror to see yourself.

The 'Despite everything, it's still you' vibe just cements all the growth and experiences that have happened as so much more real when that happens. Bonus points because mirrors in Omori are a time bomb where you can be reminded of the guilt following you- and this one is safe. This one is pure and clean. You did it.

1:37:50 - As I said earlier, going up does nothing. Dead end.

1:39:00 - I have to tell you something.

Simple ending. And yet slams me like two trucks. I'm so proud.

1:41:00 - Post credits scene.

This is so heartwarming and their smiles are the purest thing in the entire world.

1:42:50 - BAD ENDING RECORDING.

All I'll say on that is the bad ending made me feel terrible inside. Give up, live in your bubble, and subconsciously end it all so you never have to confront reality again.

My gut felt heavy to be honest.

And the fact that THAT is when Bo En Time is played is INCREDIBLE.

Having the sky shift like that gave goosebumps and cemented my dread.

Just seeing it now has me feeling very poorly.

Okay. Video done.

Now for general thoughts.

First off this White Space cycle has been going on for YEARS with Sunny only getting worse as he suppresses things more and more and the reason he found the strength to overcome is because of his friends and I'm gonna yell about it.

THE REASON SUNNY IS BREAKING FREE CAN BE DIRECTLY POINTED AT KEL THINKING "FUCK IT, I'M ABOUT TO LOSE A FRIEND, AND I DON'T WANT TO"

And I just think that is sweet as hell. The strength was inside himself, but the problem itself caused Sunny to demonize and not trust himself- he needed someone to break him free and help convince him that he's not irredeemable. And boom.

The way this game handles Denial and even gives it physical form with the 'Something's that both Sunny and Basil harbor is just awesome.

I touched on it but combat in Omori is very, very good.

I've said it here and there as I played and I feel like going at length in the finale post is pointless because this isn't a review but to put it concisely.

Types changing mid-combat, the character archetypes being so well defined, the follow up system, combat in Omori is some top notch turn based RPG stuff.

Like up there with the greats, the timeless masterpieces. This is GOOD fighting. So it was surprising the good ending didn't emphasize it- I explained why that makes sense, but even still! It'd probably be lesser for it (as explained previously) but it's interesting they practiced that restraint for the message they wanted to send.

Repeatin' that Mari's smile in the recital made me cry. Burned in my brain.

I'm still surprised I got the post credits scene because I DID water the plants a lot but when the game showed me them all dead I assumed that was the fail condition.

I genuinely do want to try the Omori route some time down the road. I hope I get around to it.

I am slightly dissuaded just because the Omori route only gets the neutral endings which are not Good To Be Blunt :(

But I want to see what dream content there is and I hear there are other bosses!

Other small bits from my notes:

Replacing denial (the black bulb) with hope (the white bulb) was good as heck.

The imagery of the 'Something' is so top notch- using the shadow of her body combined with the piercing gaze of her single eye- MY GOD.

The fragility of life being so present- between memories of near death experiences, to the way in which Mari dies, to the ease at which either Basil or Sunny can end the game. It's tense and heart-wrenching.

The way the 'Something' behind Sunny almost always shadows over him like an ever present weight.

Tearful, hopeful, pure, kids enduring a guilt metric tons heavier than their bodies could ever handle and finally, finally moving beyond it.

I said more in a personal post, and I'll reblog that.

Honestly, just timestamping through the video took it out of me and got the point across.

Omori is a wonderful game.

It's definitely a favorite for me, high up there on my list.

Between the themes, the gameplay, the humor, the ending.

This is a good one.

And now I get to end having experienced all the care and love in this title, that's such a sweet thing.

Now I know this finale post is a mess, illegible even. I have gotten sloppier as I've begun embracing just 'experiencing and rambling' and perhaps my formatting with change yet again until I find something more easily shared.

Despite that. I want to thank any who popped in on this playthrough.

This was a good one, a highlight of the blog for sure- and I'm always happy when I see some people enjoying the absolute mess I toss online when I do one of these :P

So thank you for your time, and thank you to any ridiculous enough to read my nonsense here.

Have a good one :)

And just as expected I feel I've said nothing and barely touched the surface as the post-game-head of mine does a poor job lol. Even still :P

Day 17: Loneliness

Trigger warning: Self hatred, Mentions of Suicide, Death of characters

I tried to figure out a way to make this one happy but I couldn't, so enjoy this angsty story. I hope it doesn't trigger anyone, I don't normally write angst.

@deepperplexity

It was December 24 and the stars shined bright up in the night sky. The small park near Spinners End was empty.

.

Well almost empty.

.

There was one boy sitting alone at the swing set. His unkept hair covered his face from the world as he looked down at his feet. If people had been walking through the park they would assume the strange boy was asleep.

.

But that wasn't the case, no if you'd take a closer look you could see that the boy was shaking and if you stepped closer you could hear the faint sounds of whimpers and choked sobs.

.

Now you may be wondering why this boy was crying in the middle of the park all alone. That's just it he was alone and not only that but he was alone on Christmas.

.

Life seemed to enjoy causing this boy pain because in the past year he had lost his only friend, one of the few people that actually liked him. All because he said something so horrible to her, because he blindly followed in the footstep of people who claimed were his friends, and because he was a bloody idiot. He didn't blame her for ending their friendship, he blamed himself.

.

And if losing his only friend wasn't bad enough, he had received news that his mother had passed away. He was informed by Dumbledore just before winter break and he didn't know how to react. His heart shattered completely, his mother may have not been the best but he loved her none the less and he know she loved him even if she didn't show it.

.

Now he was back home in order to plan her funeral, he knew his father wouldn't do it seeing as he'd be to drunk to do anything at all. He hated the world right now, he hated everything, he lost two of the only people who ever truly cared for him. One to death and the other to society.

.

It seemed he wasn't destined to have any sort of kindness in his life. His life seemed to only get worse with each day and he didn't know how much more he could take.

.

The thought of ending it has crossed his mind before, even more so when he was told about the death of his mother. There was a voice in his head that told him to go, to set himself free. Maybe then he'd be happy, if he ended it he could be reunited with his mother and she could hold him again without fear.

.

As much as he wanted to do it he couldn't bring himself to do it. Because everytime the thought came up so did Lily.

.

"Lily..." He muttered to himself, how would she feel if she found out he left to join his mother up in the clouds. Would she cry? Would she not care? Would anyone care?.

.

"The world is better off without me anyways" He said to himself as he wiped away the tears from him face. Tho no matter how many times he said that he couldn't bare to leave Lily completely. She was already hurting because of him what if his death caused her far more pain then what he had said to her.

.

"I'm nothing but life's punching bag" He slowly stood up and stared up at the sky "Causing others nothing but pain" He added "Destined to live a life full of darkness" he let out a painful chuckle.

.

"Don't worry ma, I'll join you soon. For now just enjoy your new found freedom" He said his voice horace from the crying. He sighed softly as he began walking back to his home in Spinners End.

.

True to his word he did join his mother a year later. He reunited with her on Christmas Eve and on Christmas day the world was gifted with knowledge of the passing of Severus Snape.

Imagine having a second child with Viktor Drago...

So I wrote this because @lady-olive-oil was insistant on killing people off, lol. Love you Liv!

I also kind of forgot I wrote this so there was more I wanted to write but I forgot those parts.

**********************************************

You weren't meant to give birth so early. But here you were sitting in a nice relaxing bath, Lily on the bathroom floor drawing more pictures for Viktor while you soaked. If you were honest the contractions had started early in the morning, but they varied between 4hrs and 3 minutes apart. So you had ignored them. But now it was 2 in the afternoon you were pretty sure you were having contractions - the proper ones.

"Lily baby, can you pass mommy here phone please" her little head popped up beside the bath with a big smile. "Are you going to ring daddy? Can I talk to him?" she asked as she disappeared out of the bathroom.

Viktor should have been the one you were going to call but he wasn't.

"I'm going to call Aunt Jenny" you smile kissing her forehead in thanks letting her get back to her drawing. "I'll make Aunt Jenny a picture too" she states, paper rustling about. You pressed the call button next to Jenny's picture (a picture of her and lily at the beach) and waited for her to answer.

"Thank god you called. I'm so tired, I'm literally falling asleep at my desk… What's new?" she sang.

"Code Red" you whispered down the phone.

"Huh?" you can hear the frowns of confusion on Jenny's face. "Oh, Lily, I can go get her from preschool" you could here her moving around more on her end.

"No, Lily's here with me-"

"Hi Aunt Jenny!" Lily called from the floor, voice echoing off the bathroom tiles.

"Oh" Jenny was frowning again.

"The other code red, the new one. The second one" you watched Lily for a reaction but she was absorbed back into her drawing.

"Shit" Jenny shouted.

"Shit, shit, shit! SHIT! Are you sure? It's not those fake ones, those pickle hiccup contraction things" she panicked, you could hear things being knocked around and a draw open and then slam closed.

"You mean Braxton Hicks, and no"

"You're not due for like another 2 months, I'm looking at my calendar. It says on my calender" you could hear her voice go up an octave in panic. You were pretty sure she was also poking the calender too.

Jenny was down as your second birthing partner, after Viktor of course. But since Viktor was away for a fight that was still wasn't due for another 6 weeks, Jenny had happily (and in a drunken state) assured Viktor she'd be your number two should anything happen. But it would be fine because nothing would happen because you still had two months to go.

"I know, I know...Can you maybe come anyway, and maybe it'll be fine by the time you get here"

"Of course, I'm leaving now" she hung up quickly.

"Will Auntie Jenny bring me jellies" Lily asked, pencils poised in her hand.

"Maybe" you laugh, glad she oblivious to what's happening.

By the time Jenny arrived you were out of the bath and sitting in the living room on your yoga ball wondering if you should call Viktor or not.

He'd flown back to the states to fight again, and really concentrate on getting ready as this opponent was almost equal in size to Viktor. You knew if you called him he'd freak out and even fly back (or walk if he had to).

"(Y/n)!!!" Jenny practically screamed, slamming the door closed. You could hear her but not see her. Lily sprinted off to find her Aunt, and reappeared on Jenny's hip.

"Are they for real?" she asked looking like a deer caught in the headlights.

"I think so, they've just got worse"

"Auntie bought me jellies!" Lily waved the box and then wriggled out of Jenny's arms and ran off. At least she was occupied.

****

“Is it okay to make a call?" you asked in the back of the ambulance. The female paramedic nodded as she carried on writing things down.

Jenny was following in her car with Lily and your hospital bags.

You pressed the call button and held the phone against your ear. There was a series of tial tones, including the international one.

"Hello" it was a quick, short answer.

"Ivan, it's y/n" slight relief washed over you hearing his voice.

"Hello. You want to speak to Viktor?"

"No, no, no, no, no" there were too many no's for Ivan's liking - he felt worried but the fact you weren't crying and he could understand you made him worry a tiny bit less.

Ivan said something in Russian but you couldn't hear, it was muffled, like he had his hand over the mouthpiece. There was the sound of a metal door slamming closed and then silence.

"What's wrong?"

"The baby, its early" there was a long pause from both of you - you both didn't know what to say.

"I'll get Viktor"

"No don't...I mean I know he needs to know, but not right now. You know he'll get on the first plane back, won't think twice about the fight. I can't let him do that." Ivan said nothing but also agreed. But he also wanted to tell his son. Congratulate him, tell everyone in the training room - he had another grandchild.

"I'll let him know it was all my idea not to tell him, just try and act like everything's normal. Please?“

“Are you okay? Are you at the hospital?" the concern in Ivan's voice broke you and you started to cry.

"I'm fine. I'm on my way in an ambulance"

"Are you on your own?" he sound panicked. "Where's Lily?"

"She's following in a car with Jenny" Ivan remembered Jenny from when she came to the beach that day. Ivan was struck by how caring Jenny was with Lily - making sure she ate and drank enough while still having fun.

"She must call me" you nodded even tho Ivan couldn't see you.

"Here" the paramedic handed you a tissue to dry your eyes. "Don't worry, everything's gonna be okay"

***

Olivia May Drago, born 2 months early but otherwise healthy.

Jenny had called Ivan to let him know everything was okay - you were okay, Lily was okay (but probably had new found profession as some sort of Antinal Nurse specialising in premature babies) and that Viktor's new baby girl was okay too. It was only when Jenny came back into the room, an hour later did you realise she had been talking to Ivan for an hour. "He's so funny, Ivan" she said with a smile on her face. You raised a quizzical eyebrow at her as she peered into the neonatal cot to look at Olivia. "Did you just say Ivan's funny?“ you asked, maybe the drugs were making you hear things." Yeah, the jokes he cracks. But otherwise he says he's glad everyone's okay. I said I'll call him tomorrow"

"You should go, it's late" Lily had crashed out on the bed in the room reserved for partners to sleep on.

"No way, do you know how hard it was to get this parental leave. HR officially hate me, so I'm going to use every moment to stare at this beautiful girl" she cooed, picking up Olivia from her cot.

Lily had been born 4 weeks early, so Jenny had fought tooth and nail to have the right to use shared parental leave to help you look after Lily and the baby assuming Olivia would be born early too, despite not actually being a parent to either. She had initially demanded full maternity leave, but had settled for 3 and a half weeks "shared parental" leave. "That's what they get for not having a watertight policy" she'd smugly smiled sipping non alcoholic wine with you when she told you when you met her for lunch just after Viktor left to prepare for the fight.

You were trying not to cry but the harder you did, the quicker your eyes filled up with tears. So when you blinked they came streaming down your face. "Hey, don't you start crying because I'm gonna start crying again" Jenny moved to perch on the edge of your bed still holding Olivia.

"I know you feel bad, but don't. Everything is okay, you're okay, baby's okay. Lily's okay. I'm okay" the last part made you laugh and you brushed the tears away.

"But we need to make sure Viktor's okay, and that means not telling him just yet because we app know what will happen. I'll just keep taking a million photos and videos so he has stuff to watch. Here, hold her" Jenny passed you Olivia and grabbed her phone to take pictures.

"Do I look a mess?" you asked, aware that not only had you given birth 6 hours ago but you had also cried one too many times. "Actually, you look so good. Which makes me slightly hate you" she placed her phone down and then made grabbing hands at Olivia. "My ovaries hurt when I don't hold her" she blushed.

***

You where now sat in the hotel suite that had been reserved for Viktor. Lily was laying on the floor - half on top of the fluffy rug, half off - drawing more pictures for Viktor. You were sure she was on over 100 at this point, but it kept her occupied, you enjoyed listening to her stories behind them and writing them on the back of the picture for Viktor to read later.

She was currently drawing the picture of him winning his current fight - the one that was meant to start in 45 minutes.

You were sat on the overly large sofa breastfeeding Olivia, after having to shout at Buddy Marcella and the entourage he brought for you to leave. He'd brought a nanny with him - just in case you wanted to leave Lily and Olivia to go watch the fight. He was driving you crazy more than usual.

You didn't need help, you just needed space and for not a single soul to mention to Viktor that he had an earlier than expected baby girl he'd never seen. You'd also spoken to Ivan at length who had been extra hard and stubborn on your behalf making sure everything and everyone would be perfect.

***

Just as the fight started Olivia woke up with a cry. You half didn't mind as she'd been asleep for a long time, as if she was waiting for the perfect moment to announce her presence in the world. She was very quiet for a newborn.

You noticed that Viktor seemed to be fighting differently, quicker, even harder, like he just wanted it to be over.

But that wasn't surprising. When Viktor had agreed to the fight, there were a few additional requirements that Buddy had added in. Endorsements and a whole bunch of extra PR stuff, including promo stuff with Adonis Creed.

"Hey!" you called to Buddy. He turned around with that stupid grin on his face. "Just remembered my husband's a person and not just your cash cow" he'd then proceeded to try and butter you up but it didn't work.

***

As the ring filled with people from either team and the official referee to call the match you spotted Buddy climbing into the ring. You held your breath as you watched him whisper something to Viktor. Ivan appeared and pushed Buddy away, but you could see Viktor was getting impatient and just wanted the result said. You watched Ivan place his hands on Viktor's shoulders and he calmed down a little. The referee appeared and the camera angle zoomed back showing Viktor and his opponent standing either side of the referee.

You didn't let your breathe go until the referee held up Viktor's arms and the crowd cheered. Lily jumped up dancing around with her picture in her hand. "Told you daddy won" she wiggled her hips side to side and threw the picture in the air along with her crayons.

***

Now you felt sick. Sheer panic and you tried to organise your thoughts and your words to explain to Viktor that you were sorry for not telling him that Olivia had come early, that you cried after every phone call with him because you wanted to just tell him. But you were glad that you didn't, that there were no distractions.

"Lily, come here please" you call, her silence not always a good thing. She skips from the bedroom, her face covered in melted chocolate. Then she stop rigid, eyes wide. "Daddy!“ she screams, sprinting past you. You turn, this isn't how you wanted him to find out. "Grandpa!“ Lily screeches, almost another octave higher. She doges Viktor and throws herself at Ivan.

Viktor doesn't seem to mind that Lily skipped him. He's staring at you or Olivia, or both of you as you rock Olivia in your arms. She's quiet now, as if nothing happened. He drops his bag and slowly walks closer to you. When he reaches you, he pulls you against him, his lips rest on forehead which makes you cry.

"I'm sorry I wasn't there, I'm sorry you had to do this on your own" Viktor tenderly hugs you, careful not to squash Olivia.

You pull away to wipe your face with one hand, surprised at how relaxed Viktor is. "My dad told me. I made him when I saw he had a lot of calls from Jenny, I thought something was wrong" you looked to Ivan, but he was busy cleaning the chocolate from Lily's face.

***

Everything was calmer. Everything was fine. Viktor sat holding Olivia, with Lily on his lap. They talk in hushed tones over a sleeping Olivia. Both falling quiet every so often to stare at the peaceful baby.

Viktor was stunned by how beautiful his second baby girl was. Her tiny nose, her tiny mouth, her ten tiny fingers and ten tiny toes. Lily's mind was slightly blown by Viktor telling her she was once this small, even he was too.

Together they couldn’t stop looking at Olivia. Every now and then Lily gently kissed her sister - telling Viktor all the things she planned to teach her little sister - coloring within the lines, eating jellies that Aunt Jenny brings etc, eating all the chocolate you could find in a hotel suite.

By the time Ivan got back with food for everyone, it was his turn to fuss over his new grandchild. "World's happiest grandfather" Ivan announced taking Olivia from Viktor. He sat down on the couch with Olivia while you pulled out your phone to show Viktor the million photos you'd taken while he was away.

**********************************************

Tags: @ellixthea @lovelymari4 @chaneajoyyy

@honeychicana @beaminglife @amelatonin @themyscxiras @crushed-pink-petals @jojolu @endless00paradise @est1887 @cajunpeach @melinda-january @profoundlynerdywolf @deathonyourtongue @designerwriterchic @itsbqueenthings @alicesfracturedmirror

Shuichi, Rantaro, Kaito, Komaeda and Kokichi being walked in on by S/O while they're changing, if you'd please (SFW please)? (Also all the new mods are doing a wonderful job, keep it up !!)

i’M aliVe

Thank you very much for reading our stuff! I’m still getting back to the swing of things, so I hope you don’t mind if this is a bit rough!

Putting this under a cut just in case !

~ Mod Ouma

SFW! Shuichi, Rantaro, Kaito, Komaeda and Kokichi being walked in on by S/O while they’re changing

Shuichi Saihara

After a long day’s work, he finally gets to unwind a little.

Being the Ultimate Detective didn’t just mean he had to chase after people that caused trouble. It meant  mountains of paperwork.

Tired from both physical and mental exertion, Shuichi flops over the bed.

Shirt long gone and too sluggish to do anything else, he just stays there.

He hears the distant calling of his name, it doesn’t register in his tired mind. He feels bad for not answering any louder, murmuring replies into his pillow.

Then it’s silent.

“Shuichi? Are you okay-” 

“AAAAAH S / O ?!”

Shuichi screamed, then you screamed- the both of you screamed until you remembered you had legs, bolting through the doorway. 

You tried to close the door, reached for the door knob at least three times before it closed shut.

The two of you meekly apologize for startling one another, nervous laughter fills the air as you two agree not to speak of this ever again-

Nagito Komaeda

Your class is on a three day field trip to a private tropical island.

It’s no surprise Nagito finds his luggage missing. So he’s left with a shirt doused in ocean water.

He didn’t want to get sick, so he opted to take it off, bathing in the sunlight streaming through the windows of his room.

Luckily for him, his luggage managed to get lumped in with yours.

“S/O! Fancy seeing you here.. In my room?”

Nagito doesn’t react so differently at all. But his eyes light up at the sight of his returned belongings.

He’s beaming at you with his usual pure, grateful smile that could make nuns weep. His hands remain suspended in the air after he waved at your frozen figure.

The two of you remain frozen, you, for obvious reasons and he, waiting for you to greet him back.

“You found my things, thank you S/O! .. This isn’t the best time to.. talk, but don’t worry! I’m sure sights like this from trash like-”

Don’t let him finish that sentence!

Panicking after he almost lapses back into his usual line of thought, you throw a shirt at him.

Getting the message, he chuckles shyly and put his new shirt on right.

Kokichi Ouma

Kokichi is a really fast changer. He has to be, after multiple outfit changes in between his pranks and whatever undercover DICE work he does.

So he sometimes may get lax about locking his doors.

… But that doesn’t mean he doesn’t rig his bedroom door with traps!

You had walked in on him, assuming he’d be playing video games or napping.

The moment you swing the door open, rolls of cling wrap taped between the frames traps half your face and torso.

For good measure- and to cover up a girlish scream threatening to squeak through him- Kokichi casually chucks his checkered scarf over your faces.

He doesn’t give away his embarrassment, save for how pink his ears are getting as he hurriedly puts on a shirt.

Just kidding, he’s waaay too flustered.

“B-Buy me dinner first before you walk in on me naked, S/O!”

You choke on your words and apologies before Kokichi decides to be merciful.

“Juuuuust kidding! I’m not changing. You’re super pink, so cute!”

This has to be one of the fastest times he had ever changed, it only took him a few seconds to put his excessively buttoned top on before you cut through the cling wrap.

His impish laugh gets a bit strangled near the end as you swat at him for teasing you.

Kaito Momota

You’re not sure how it happened, but you managed to walk in on Kaito changing.

He’s tangled into his school shirt. He’s somehow managed to get his head through one of the sleeves, and his one arm through the lining between the front buttons.

“Kaito?? Are you alri-”

“Wha- WHOA S/O! Didn’t see you there?!?!” 

Kaito tries to set his shirt right, but fails. He ends up burrowing his elbows uncomfortably against his ribs. 

You’re flustered, he’s flustered- no one knows what to do??

Eventually, you’ll find it kind of funny in an endearing sort of way.

“Kaito, you’re making this worse- let me help-”

“Nope! Nah, I-I’ve got this!”

“Kaito no-!”

“D-Don’t worry S/O! I’ll be out in a sec!”

Like a desperate coyote trapped in a cage, he eventually resorts to trying to flex his shirt off.

Nobody would be not sure how to feel about this.

You cringe and back away from the spectacle. 

Some time later, you two manage to laugh about how silly the whole thing was!

Rantaro Amami

Your relationship with Rantaro is a very relaxed one.

At first, Rantaro doesn’t even bat an eye at your sudden appearance.

He’s not sure why or when you’re suddenly in the room with him.

“S/O, you gave me quite a scare there,” he chuckled, feeling both endeared and embarrassed by how slowly your face turned into a tomato.

“S-Sorry, should’ve locked the door.”

With a strangled cry, you manage to rip your feet off the floor and hide behind the door frame.

From there, you chastise him for not locking the door while he a blush finally breaks out on his cheeks as he gives you a rare bashful smiles behind the room’s walls.

“That’s fair. Though, you should be more careful. An adventurer should always look before they walk.”, he lightly jokes.

Neither you or Rantaro brings back that little event afterwards. But it was relatively easy to fall back into a pleasant atmosphere with how casual and nonchalant he was being.

Janis & Jimmy

Janis: where are you? Janis: put my coat away and everything Jimmy: weren't allowed in Jimmy: face don't fit Jimmy: 💔🎻💔 Janis: serious Janis: thought you said you could get in clubs Janis: hang on then, I'll queue up again 😑 Jimmy: it ain't my fault the door bloke's a dickhead Jimmy: fancies his chances better without me in the way Jimmy: might as well go for it now Jimmy: catch you in a bit 👍 Janis: sure, he's got it in for you, boy 😏 Janis: whatever Jimmy: he wants to put it in you Jimmy: understandable when he's going off how well you scrub up Jimmy: keep it off the snap & it is whatever, girl Janis: gross Janis: he's easily 42 Jimmy: don't knock it til you've tried it Jimmy: we ain't in the north so that ain't death's door Jimmy: & you ain't got me there to buy your drinks now, play it smart, rich girl Jimmy: that's how you stay rich, yeah Janis: well I actually got in so I can check out the talent beyond the door 👍 Janis: but tah for the tips Janis: what are you gonna do then Jimmy: big town full of Leprechauns Jimmy: maybe I'll find the pot of gold, gay clubs are the rainbow I assume Jimmy: start there Jimmy: find my own 👴💕 Janis: 🍀 Janis: funny now but when I end up dead in the river you'll be suspect no.1 Jimmy: like anyone's gonna believe I could take you out Jimmy: too 💪 you Jimmy: worry more about everyone chatting that you turned me 🌈 honestly Janis: ha Janis: like you said, keep it off the snap Janis: anyone sees you in there they'll have to out themselves first so Jimmy: 👌 Janis: laters bae Jimmy: 😘 Janis: [finds him, the kiss, walking away] Jimmy: [follows her out leaving this girl like ??!! as she also follows for the awks] Jimmy: [says 'keeping it short & sweet all across town tonight then?' because now is not the time for bants so obvs he's banting] Janis: [is just looking at the girl like bitch what are you doing and ain't gonna talk to him whilst she's there] Jimmy: [lights a 🚬 for an excuse to be still standing there when he's being blanked, sharing with the random girl just to make it worse, introduces Janis to her by one of her fake names cos actual dickhead] Janis: [completely blanks the girl like it would be obvious you were not welcome; 'how do you know no one saw you?'] Jimmy: [the girl be like UM I'm going back in, are you coming boy & he shrugs like in a bit cos still smoking obvs to prolong this & let's her go before he answers cos not trying to explain fake dating to this random] Jimmy: ['you've been in, it's well dead 'cause of being well shit'] Janis: ['so you don't then, in other words. great.'] Jimmy: ['nobody saw me. Calm down.'] Janis: ['fuck off. if you can't do this properly then why suggest it?'] Jimmy: ['I am doing it properly, I told you, it's alright'] Janis: ['for you maybe but that ain't the only part of the deal so sort it out. fucking amatuer'] Jimmy: ['piss off am I. It is sorted. She ain't from around here & nobody who matters saw us.' Janis: [shakes head 'yeah, you are. fuck sake, how old are you, 12?'] Jimmy: [is clearly fuming but trying to act not bothered. 'You'll be the one who fucks this if you don't trust what I'm telling you, girl'] Janis: ['nah, get why they didn't let you in now; what is this, under 18s night? check how old she was, did you?'] Jimmy: [just gives her a fuck you kind of look but that's a mistake cos she's really hot so has to look away] Jimmy: you got in, what did you follow me to this shithole for? Janis: [is laughing at him but it's obvs fake, then shrugs like, why not?] Jimmy: nah go on, you're such a #pro Jimmy: reasons for everything you do, all part of the plan all the time with you Jimmy: so what Janis: well no shit Janis: I didn't want to come out but it's on socials now so we need at least one decent picture together so they know it's #real Jimmy: come on then Jimmy: [poses in a really fake piss taking way] Janis: are you this shit or what Janis: I said, do it properly or I ain't bothering Jimmy: [does that sexy blowing smoke thing at her so it's basically a kiss like that gif I have of Nico doing it in MMFD & snaps a pic of it] Janis: [nods like that'll work 'cos what's she gonna say] Jimmy: 👍 Jimmy: [then actually kisses her & again taking pics being all like don't say I don't do shit properly but like we both know he just wants to & its a moment] Janis: [pushes him back 'cos can't deal] Janis: that'll do Janis: keep it softcore, no one needs that much convincing Jimmy: 👌 Jimmy: in a bit then Janis: you're seriously going back in there Jimmy: [does the why not shrug she gave him earlier like its so obvious that you want her to tell you not to, boy please] Janis: [scoffs and shrugs back] Janis: have fun Jimmy: try not to fall or get pushed in the river, Joanne Jimmy: it'd be a crying shame that Janis: no one's pushing me away Janis: trust Jimmy: not in that outfit Jimmy: or out of it Jimmy: I get it Jimmy: you've done your snap bragging now, shut up Janis: can't make me Jimmy: 💪🏆 you Jimmy: get that too Janis: good Janis: don't get it twisted Jimmy: 👑 of the #flex Jimmy: nowt twisted here Janis: flexing makes it sound like it ain't true Jimmy: [sends her the pics so she can post them cos ultimate shade for rn that he won't] Jimmy: none of this is Jimmy: what did you say, don't get it twisted, Janet Jimmy: have fun with your #s Jimmy: [goes back inside] Janis: piss off Janis: I can get into places that ain't this dump, remember? Jimmy: you ain't let me forget Jimmy: enjoy being a hot girl then Jimmy: 👍 Janis: 🤞 you can find one yourself Jimmy: tah Janis: so welcome Jimmy: 💕 Janis: 🖕 Jimmy: lovely you Jimmy: [leaves again because it actually is shit in there & obvs not feeling it] Janis: don't take it personal Jimmy: weren't & won't Janis: how unlike you Jimmy: you reckon you know what I'm like Janis: I reckon you love thinking you're special Jimmy: if I loved that we wouldn't be doing this Jimmy: I'd just let 'em all fawn over me like its their job while I do mine Janis: better in theory and bullshit than in practice Janis: 🤷 Jimmy: say the same for this fake girlfriend bollocks Janis: 💔 for you Janis: naturally Jimmy: 🎻🎻 Jimmy: I'll live Janis: shame Jimmy: 💔 for you then Janis: yeah, should be Janis: inconsiderate Jimmy: reckon you've got that covered, my dear Jimmy: but I'll do my best Janis: excuse me? Jimmy: you heard Jimmy: & I bet you understood, smart girl Janis: are you drunk? Jimmy: you calling me a lightweight Jimmy: I weren't in there that long Janis: long enough Janis: 👍 Jimmy: for you maybe Janis: soz you didn't get stinky fingers? Janis: 🎻 Jimmy: yeah you looked proper sorry about it Janis: was I meant to be? Jimmy: don't bother saying it now then Janis: 🙄 Janis: did you a favour anyway Jimmy: 🙄 Janis: please Janis: even you could do better Janis: not doing this so you can throw all my good work away already Jimmy: than a girl who's not from around here, ain't gonna say shit & I don't need to see again Jimmy: not really Jimmy: but go on Janis: whatever, if that's your type Janis: then you may as well make your choice of the basics now and be done with it Jimmy: I don't have a type Jimmy: she did the job for tonight Jimmy: or would've until you turned up Jimmy: if you've got someone better in mind, I'm heading home, send 'em over Janis: lovely you Jimmy: I know Jimmy: tah though Janis: no, thank you for proving my point Jimmy: so welcome Janis: gone, was she Jimmy: or 💀 from the 🔪🔪🔪s you were throwing Jimmy: could've easily bled out while you were having your strop Janis: just playing the part Janis: like you were meant to Janis: or you want your fake gf to be that cool girl Janis: 🙄 figures Jimmy: I only clock in when there's actually an audience, babe Jimmy: like you're meant to Jimmy: & as I told you, there weren't Janis: sure Janis: you did a whole sweep of the club to doublecheck Janis: idiot Jimmy: yeah Jimmy: it ain't big or packed Jimmy: & anyway if you were playing a role you'd have kicked off in front of the everyone you're so sure was about Jimmy: not outside to me Janis: not my style Janis: but you did your part by following me out like a puppy so we're fine Jimmy: 'cause I ain't no amateur Jimmy: weren't gonna let you fuck it up by fucking off without a word Jimmy: thought you paddy's loved a bar fight Jimmy: actually 💔💔 Janis: and I know boys love bitch fights, don't mean you're gonna get one from me Jimmy: gutted me Jimmy: of all the fake girlfriends I could've had Jimmy: lumbered with a dud like Julie over here Janis: find another one then Janis: save me the hassle Jimmy: bit late for that Jimmy: deal's done Jimmy: posts are posted Janis: people break up Janis: ain't even that deep Jimmy: 1 day in? Jimmy: that's the rep you want Jimmy: alright then Janis: why ain't it your rep Jimmy: I'm the lad I'm always gonna come off better Jimmy: either I dumped you this fast 'cause you wouldn't fuck me or 'cause you did Jimmy: It don't matter to me Jimmy: & It don't look bad for me whichever way Janis: that's bullshit Janis: when's the soonest I can get out of this then Jimmy: yeah but it's the way it'll look Jimmy: I don't know Jimmy: not had to stage a fake break up before Janis: fuck sake Jimmy: 🎻🎻🎻 Janis: fuck off with that Janis: all you've done this whole time is whine you didn't get laid Janis: like I stopped you Jimmy: I ain't said shit about it even though you did stop me Jimmy: you're the one with so much chat on the subject Janis: bullshit, you're moaning on and on like I'm gonna feel sorry for you Janis: you could've gone back in, she clearly didn't care you've got a fake girlfriend Jimmy: bollocks Jimmy: & you clearly scared her off Jimmy: she didn't know about you, I don't lead with that chat up line Janis: yeah she's that fucking stupid Janis: just 'cos you're oblivious don't reckon everyone else is Jimmy: oblivious to what Jimmy: you weren't there & I didn't give her anything real Jimmy: she can't stalk my socials to check my fake relationship status without my name Janis: when I showed up Janis: to me, playing my part Janis: if you reckon she didn't clock that then you're literally braindead Jimmy: like I said, you scared her off Jimmy: & stopped me Jimmy: why am I repeating myself, are you the drunk one now Janis: bullshit Janis: don't use me as an excuse for whyever you pussied out Jimmy: piss off Jimmy: I went back in, I don't need excuses it's literally what happened Jimmy: you fucked it up for me Jimmy: I'm good but nobody's that good Janis: 👌 Janis: whatever makes you feel better about your fuck up Jimmy: whatever makes you feel better about putting on a show for nobody but me & her Janis: you wish Jimmy: if this is your coming out, sure you could track her down & crack on, you did me easy enough Janis: hilarious Janis: even if I was gay, I'd have standards Jimmy: I've got standards but I've also got a nightmare of a fake girlfriend so Jimmy: well paranoid about getting rumbled she is Janis: 1. clearly not Janis: 2. well yeah, 'cos I ain't doing this for my fucking health Janis: like you said, you're gonna fuck up my rep when you've promised the opposite Jimmy: 1. I've already told you, needs must Jimmy: 2. fuck knows why you're doing it when you're so up yourself & convinced you can get anyone else you want Jimmy: like I said & yeah, promised, a deal's a deal Jimmy: I ain't gonna do nowt of the sort Jimmy: just calm down Janis: yeah, this is 100% about getting boys to wanna ride me Janis: boys are easy, no one needs to try to impress yous Janis: and don't tell me to calm down, seriously Janis: 'less you wanna see the opposite Jimmy: I don't give a shit what it's about for you Jimmy: you agreed to do this that's all that matters to me Jimmy: but I knew that's how you 🍀 welcomed the tourists Jimmy: better late than never Janis: stop chatting like you know then, twat Jimmy: only a rule for you that? Jimmy: you've been chatting like you know me this whole night Jimmy: leave it out or show up to my door for the brawl you want & tick off another nightmare girlfriend cliche before tomorrow Janis: you reckon you can propose it and come off all mysterious Janis: nah 😂 Janis: don't worry, sure everyone else is still wondering, new boy Jimmy: 👍 Janis: we're probably good now for a few days anyway yeah Janis: so enjoy Jimmy: will do Jimmy: have a good one Jimmy: 💕 Janis: say you too but you're going home? Jimmy: like I said, I'll live Jimmy: got work tomorrow anyway Janis: best to face them not-hungover I guess Jimmy: we can say that's the reason Janis: oh my GOD Janis: give it up Jimmy: already have Jimmy: that's why I'm on my way home Janis: I mean, sadsack, I ain't apologizing Jimmy: 💔💔💔 Janis: so much effort, you Jimmy: you too, babe Jimmy: must be #fated Janis: eurgh Janis: shut up 😂 Jimmy: alright Jimmy: night then Janis: now he listens Jimmy: not on the 🕒 girl, soz Jimmy: soon enough Janis: you hear me asking for a latte Jimmy: I mean your fake boyfriend one Jimmy: & you'd never ask for a latte, piss off Jimmy: I don't have to know you to know that Janis: MY 🕒? Janis: YOUR fake girlfriend one, own it at least Janis: alright, you can 'know' that much Janis: 'cos I'd have to throw it in your face before I drank it so Jimmy: iced it is then Jimmy: burn scars ain't the sexy sort Janis: rude but true Janis: not giving them the satisfaction of a wet t-shirt moment 🤢 Jimmy: shame Janis: like romcoms too do you Janis: seriously, give in to your pride and date fucking Janis: samantha, whatever her name is Jimmy: I watched some before I suggested this 'cause I take this shit seriously, alright, shut up Janis: 😂 Janis: that bodes well Janis: did you not make the end of any, boy Jimmy: fuck that Jimmy: I was skimming Jimmy: you ain't paying me nowt for this Janis: well I've been forced through enough to know that it never works because the people are idiots Janis: so try not to be one, eh Janis: just this once Jimmy: same to you, girl Jimmy: I get it, I'm really 💪😎 & the accent's 🔥 but don't get carried away, yeah Janis: 🙄 Janis: we're safe Janis: don't worry Jimmy: not if you keep dressing like that Jimmy: sort it out, Jasmine Jimmy: uglier the better 👌 Janis: dickhead Janis: what you want an ugly fake gf for Jimmy: be more #goals Jimmy: #Iloveheranyway Jimmy: #itaintjustskindeepladies Janis: 😒 Janis: well thanks for the insult but too bad 'cos I ain't ever Jimmy: It was literally the opposite of an insult, dickhead Jimmy: I'm saying I'm still a lad alright Jimmy: & when you look like that it's just Janis: it obviously ain't if until now you reckoned I was #ugenough to get the job done so 🖕 Janis: don't take the piss Jimmy: that ain't what I reckoned or what I said Janis: mhmm Janis: ⛏ Jimmy: you're such a knob Jimmy: what kind of fake girlfriend can't take a compliment Janis: what kind of fake boyfriend can't give one Janis: that's the real question, babe Jimmy: I literally just told you how hot you looked, babe Jimmy: try & stay with me here Janis: go on then Janis: what's the punchline Jimmy: shut up Jimmy: the joke is that I'm back home this early Jimmy: my dad's still up Jimmy: & he ain't the type to wait Janis: that's tragic Janis: poor baby Janis: could be worse, he could still be out Janis: then you'd be a real loser Jimmy: I see that & raise you he's got his girlfriend here Jimmy: might genuinely throw up in the kitchen sink Janis: oh dear Janis: least he might think you're at least drunk, sadsack Jimmy: might get drunk now to deal Jimmy: one sec Janis: honestly Janis: shoulda stayed at the nappy night Janis: weren't that bad Jimmy: if I'd known I was coming home to Michael Bublé & two sets of red wine teeth Jimmy: if you still want that fight come & 💀💀 me Janis: You'll get no mercy from me Janis: even if that's the worst thing I've ever heard Jimmy: come on Jimmy: if that's not truce worthy nowt is Jimmy: end my life & be a hot widow what could be more #goals Janis: 😂 Janis: there's no way I like you that much after a day, even faking it Janis: and no chance we've cashed in any sort of life insurance so Jimmy: actually if I 💀 myself you'll get A's in your exams Jimmy: hang on Jimmy: just leaving you a 💕 note Janis: that's definitely a myth Janis: whole school of scabs turning up at cambo like eyy someone topped themselves so now I'm a professor of theology Janis: I think not Jimmy: bit rude Jimmy: & you could've said before I blew my brains out all over my dad & the love of his week but Janis: 🤷 Janis: maybe if you hadn't left it 'til the 💕💀 note to be nice to me Jimmy: when that girl finds out she's gonna think it's because she's a shit kisser Jimmy: that's awkward Jimmy: might have to go haunt her for a bit Jimmy: make sure she knows Jimmy: play some Bublé tunes Janis: again Janis: saving it for the afterlife to be considerate Janis: dickhead Jimmy: 🎻🎻🎻 Jimmy: tell 'em none of his songs at my funeral & I won't haunt you too hard Janis: come on, sure he's murdered my way Janis: just your speed Janis: basic white boy Jimmy: It ain't my fault my parents are both too northern to branch out Janis: save it for when your Swayze'ing that bitch Janis: sure she thinks you're dead exotic Jimmy: 👍 idea Jimmy: tah babe Janis: whatever Janis: we've established you've only got 👎 ones so Jimmy: piss off Jimmy: this fake dating one is working out top Jimmy: deny it Jimmy: I saw how everyone reacted to the posts I gave you Janis: you can take a picture Jimmy: & pose for one Jimmy: this basic white boy is working for you Janis: my ancestors will be thrilled Janis: #reparationsbitch Jimmy: mine too, I bet Janis: I mean, anything beats dying down a mine, I suppose Janis: probs racists though, even if the blackface weren't intentional Jimmy: I'd take it over my present right now Jimmy: pretty sure my dad's a racist still, even if he also likes Seal Janis: lovely Janis: remind me to not come over for tea Jimmy: invite's in the post, my love Janis: 👍 Janis: give us all the chance to 'lose' it Jimmy: 'course Jimmy: but I'm giving you the chance to lose it when you come over too so Jimmy: love a fight you Jimmy: & my dad's got a very smackable face Jimmy: & personality Janis: begin to sound more and more like you've got a fetish Jimmy: shit's kicking off right now & I haven't asked you to tag team Jimmy: got me all wrong Janis: bummer Janis: he pick a minger too? Janis: should've left her at the club like you did Jimmy: he'd have to leave her in the office & that don't work for long Jimmy: perils of 😍 over the water cooler Janis: eurgh Janis: is your whole fam just one big cliche or Jimmy: piss off Janis: just saying Janis: that's two no-nos ticked off Jimmy: well don't say it Jimmy: I'm living it, that's enough Janis: alright Jimmy: alright Jimmy: don't fuck anyone I wouldn't Jimmy: saves us comparing notes Janis: the basic white girls and you are safe Janis: I'll never find out how disappointing you are 💕 Jimmy: You've misunderstood this entire thing, you're my fake girlfriend 'cause I don't wanna fuck basic white girls Jimmy: but 👌 Janis: I thought so too but you must be the confused one Janis: strobe lights were not going that hard Jimmy: she weren't top of my list Jimmy: I told you, needs must Janis: keep protesting, it's so convincing Janis: least it's just me who caught you out 😂 could've been worse Jimmy: alright shut up Jimmy: you've never had a shit night, have you Janis: obviously not Janis: have you seen me Jimmy: you ain't getting no more compliments I'm still holding onto the last one since you wouldn't take it Janis: 1. it was not a compliment Janis: 2. not like I need it Jimmy: 1. yeah it was Jimmy: 2. nah you just want it Janis: 1. no Janis: 2. and no Jimmy: Obviously you're fit that's why I asked you so leave it out Jimmy: 🙄 Janis: p sure you told me to leave it 'cos you were losing but Jimmy: need more chatting up than a real girlfriend you Janis: that's just a tragic insight into your dating history I didn't need, really Jimmy: you wish, baby Janis: ew cease and desist Janis: we definitely no'd that one Jimmy: 😂 Janis: so annoying Jimmy: I told you, #fated Janis: you call it #fated, I call it #doomed Jimmy: it's all still bollocks Jimmy: no # needed Jimmy: 💕 Janis: so poetic Jimmy: wait til you read the 💀 note Janis: I look forward to it Janis: how long 'fore I can move on with the actual hot barista though Jimmy: a day for a day Jimmy: only fair Jimmy: I get it, you couldn't score him first time round so get him with the sympathy Jimmy: well played Janis: you gave me no time Janis: not like it's my usual haunt Jimmy: it's still your home town Jimmy: get a better excuse Janis: I don't make it my business to know everyone else's Jimmy: if he's that hot no need for him to be just a rebound off my demise Jimmy: sort yourself out, girl Janis: sort yourself out for doubting his hotness Jimmy: I ain't Jimmy: I'm doubting your ability to close that deal Janis: fuck you Janis: never had an off day, remember Jimmy: only got your word for that Jimmy: & what's that worth with how much shit you chat Janis: whatever Janis: you already said you think I'm hot Janis: can't change your mind now Jimmy: you are Jimmy: don't mean that basic white lad wants you Janis: why wouldn't he Jimmy: I'll let you know when I've chatted to him on shift tomorrow Jimmy: maybe he likes his missus' more humble for a start Janis: no you won't Janis: and humble is just code for no self-esteem which you only want to cover up your own failings Jimmy: yeah I will Jimmy: & yeah maybe he's into that Jimmy: loads of lads are Janis: um he's #special and #different Janis: so don't ruin it for me with your chatter Jimmy: you're blinded by your 😍 Jimmy: & you ruined tonight for me so why shouldn't I Jimmy: makes us even Janis: no it don't Janis: she weren't no barista boy, get real Jimmy: don't matter to me Jimmy: nowt in the rules about keeping things fair Jimmy: we didn't even come up with any so Janis: even=fair so you don't get to get even by that logic, fool Janis: and pretty self-explanatory, just real relationship rules but make them fake Jimmy: even as I call it, fair as I call it Janis: fuck that Janis: you don't get to call everything Jimmy: watch me Janis: nah, you need me Janis: remember Janis: that's why it's a deal Jimmy: maybe I don't need you as much as I reckoned Jimmy: the basic white girl tonight weren't that bad Janis: like I said, call it off then Janis: in what world do I need to do what you tell me Jimmy: in the same world where you think I would do anything you tell me Jimmy: so the one we're in Janis: I ain't told you to do shit Jimmy: you are now Jimmy: call it off yourself, don't try & make me do it for you Janis: I'm saying don't act like you've got something over me Janis: at least something that I don't also have over you Janis: it ain't that deep, God Jimmy: deep enough for you to keep saying it ain't Jimmy: so convincing, babe Janis: 😑 Janis: you're the most annoying person I've had the misfortune of meeting Jimmy: nah 🥇 you Janis: well I love myself Janis: so obviously not Jimmy: let's ask about Jimmy: I reckon you'll win easy Janis: only if we were asking only the girls Janis: and you're new, you're basically anything they want you to be 'til your personality ruins it Jimmy: you're so popular with the lads, alright I heard you the first 100 times you said it Jimmy: get one of them to fake date you Janis: nah, this is the first sincere offer of fake dating I've ever Janis: so you can still feel special Jimmy: 😍😍😍 Jimmy: I can go to bed feeling like this is better than anything I could dream Jimmy: tah so much Janis: welcome Janis: do what I can Jimmy: yeah Jimmy: so far it's piss me off but let's see what tomorrow brings Janis: ain't on the ⏲ Janis: you didn't do all the convincing yourself though Jimmy: you ain't the one who needs to be convinced of owt Jimmy: thank fuck Jimmy: easy targets Janis: ain't saying I am Janis: saying give me the credit I'm owed and you'll get yours Jimmy: bollocks Janis: ? Jimmy: you were ready to slag me off earlier & loving it when you could give me credit for getting off with someone who ain't gonna ruin this Janis: it ain't the who it's the where, twat Janis: it ain't your hometown, you ain't got a clue who was or wasn't there, lbr Janis: give a fuck if you took her home but you can't be doing it in public 'til this is done Janis: simple as Jimmy: fuck's sake Jimmy: trust me Janis: why? Janis: I don't know you, you don't know me Jimmy: we're in this together or we're fucking not Jimmy: if I weren't as bothered as you I wouldn't be wasting my time Janis: fine Janis: don't be stupid about it then Jimmy: I weren't & I won't Janis: then there's no problem here Jimmy: 👍 Janis: night then Jimmy: 💕 Janis: remember to ❤ the pics Jimmy: already did Jimmy: try & keep up with me, girl Janis: 👌 Janis: keen as always, boy Jimmy: serious Jimmy: remember that next time Janis: yeah, I was the one taking it not serious Janis: 👍 Jimmy: just do better tomorrow Janis: are you actually taking the piss Jimmy: maybe Jimmy: one for the road, like Janis: mm Janis: as I said Janis: most annoying Jimmy: as I said, SUCH a good match Janis: just convince them and we're both free Jimmy: already did that too Jimmy: so say the word Jimmy: any time or place Janis: and you already said if we leave it at a fuck, I look bad so Janis: sorry, not yet Jimmy: I'm just saying Jimmy: whenever Janis: alright, I know Janis: not like it's a legally binding contract Jimmy: so I shouldn't have opened a vein to sign something in my blood Jimmy: now she tells me Jimmy: always too late you Janis: 😏 Janis: earlier it was brains, now it's veins Janis: should I call the samaritans Janis: starting to sound like a cry for help, idk 🤔 Jimmy: you heard me say what's happening in my house tonight Jimmy: it is & you should Janis: 😂 Jimmy: glad you find MB on a loop such a laugh Janis: as long as it's drowning out worse Janis: be thankful Jimmy: do you actually want me to 💀💀💀 Janis: awh babe, no Janis: I don't care whether you live or die either way Jimmy: 💕 Janis: that's the type of service you get for free, kid Jimmy: 👍 Janis: [ze next morning] Janis: I've got to come in later Jimmy: really need to throw that latte on me? Janis: ha, obviously Janis: tell me when my sister and that get there, yeah Janis: remember what they look like Jimmy: it was only a handful of kisses, you gotta get over your jealousy about last night, Jill Jimmy: & yeah Jimmy: my best customers that's the type of service you get here at the CG Janis: strangely enough, not about you or my fake jealousy Janis: just lay off the charm offensive for five when I get there, that's all I need you to do Jimmy: alright Janis: 👍 Janis: see you then Jimmy: in a bit Janis: it'll be easy, no drama Jimmy: no fake break up then Jimmy: 👌 Janis: sorry to disappoint Jimmy: yeah I'm well 💔💔💔 Janis: make it up to you Janis: you'll get tons more #lad points Jimmy: clearly my top priority tah Jimmy: what's going on? Janis: I know you're just as 😍 for him Janis: nah, nothing, my sister's just being more of a bitch than usual Jimmy: you can't know I've been so careful with my 💘 & 😍 around him so there Jimmy: & what you wanna shut her up Janis: oh babes 🙊 Janis: yep Janis: need to, actually, but that's the gist Jimmy: don't she believe we're madly in love? Jimmy: bit rude Janis: appaz, you have no control over your 😍 at all 'cos she #knows you're into her so Janis: 👌 tah Jimmy: 1. she can piss off 'cause I've never Jimmy: 2. I know exactly what to do Janis: yeah, she's full of shit Janis: well so do I but open to ideas Jimmy: you get to do what you want, she's your sister & they weren't my 😍 Janis: 👍 stick to the plan then Janis: she's an idiot, you have to be blatant or she won't get it Jimmy: you gonna tell me the plan or nah Jimmy: & I get paid not to be blatant, gutted as I am about it Janis: you won't get in trouble Janis: not gonna go that hard Jimmy: not what I asked Janis: like you're as dumb as her? Janis: just gotta come be really #goals in their faces Janis: 5 minutes, tops Janis: easy Jimmy: double it if you wanna be #convincing Jimmy: never given a girl so little time in my life Janis: #swoon 😏 Janis: like I said, not gonna go that hard 'cos it has to be in front of them Janis: that's the whole point Janis: just look like you're having fun, yeah? Jimmy: you have to go hard in front of them, that's the whole point Jimmy: not as dumb as her tah Janis: 10 minutes is a bit much for making out Janis: could get it done in that time Jimmy: who have you been making out with? Jimmy: actually gutted for you Jimmy: can't even add the piss taking emojis right now Janis: shut up Janis: I'm not gonna suck face with you for 10 minutes Jimmy: if you can't hack it, call it off now Janis: 😑 Janis: just tell me when they're there Jimmy: said I would Janis: saving the enthusiasm, I get it Jimmy: that & drying my eyes over your real dating history Janis: what are you chatting now Jimmy: nowt Jimmy: just making ☕ Jimmy: you're the one giving away your shit kissing secrets Janis: piss off Janis: there's nothing wrong with my kissing Janis: it's just the boring bit, everyone knows that Janis: may as well skip it Jimmy: if you're doing it wrong, yeah Janis: you aren't an expert Janis: people like different shit, alright Jimmy: calm down Jimmy: you ain't meant to be coming in swinging Janis: stop being a dick then Janis: it's off-putting Jimmy: if you're that easy to put off this fake relationship is properly doomed Janis: I told you Jimmy: get it together or don't come Janis: I'm fine Janis: you're the one chatting shit Janis: you've got one job Jimmy: two Jimmy: get it right, rich girl Janis: yeah, so drop the relationship therapist bit Janis: no one's buying Jimmy: I get it, you're rich 'cause you're tight with every penny Janis: You're just full of shit, and I get that for free Janis: 🍀 me Jimmy: you wish I were Jimmy: but we ain't making 'em come true until the girls get here so Janis: why would I want that Jimmy: my therapist bit's been dropped Jimmy: at your request Janis: we'll talk about this comedian bit later Janis: I've got things to do Jimmy: 👍 Jimmy: me too Janis: things that require more than one braincell but Janis: happy for you Jimmy: soz I'm not performing brain surgery right now Jimmy: well patronizing you Janis: whatever Janis: unlikely to catch my sister or obs so suits my purpose Janis: on* Jimmy: happy for you Janis: suits yours too Janis: or were you looking for someone to be really into you slobbering all over them Janis: shoulda been clearer Jimmy: there's nowt about kissing you for exactly 5 minutes mid shift at my job which suits me Jimmy: but go on Janis: I said 5, tops Janis: get it done in less if you're gonna be so moody Janis: yes or no, can I come in or what Jimmy: do what you want it's your masterplan Janis: well not if you're actually gonna get in trouble Jimmy: like you give a shit about my job security Jimmy: plenty of places to make a latte in this town Janis: I ain't that much of a bitch Jimmy: who knows maybe you'll do me a favor & force me into a job that requires two braincells next Janis: shut up Janis: it was a joke Janis: and you started it Jimmy: really funny you Janis: backatcha Jimmy: 💕 Janis: forget about it Jimmy: alright Janis: nothing lost, yeah Jimmy: nowt gained either but Jimmy: whatever Janis: well despite what you reckon, my secondary goal wasn't to get you sacked so Janis: sorta outweighs the need to get back at them Jimmy: you couldn't get me sacked if you tried Jimmy: you've got one foot out the door before you're even in Janis: you want me hanging about all day Jimmy: not what I said or meant Jimmy: I've had more of a connection with a customer whose order got fucked up than what you're planning to give me Jimmy: who the fuck is that meant to convince Jimmy: but I'm the one not doing this properly Janis: maybe we should fake hang out some more after this Janis: alright Janis: but all you've gotta convince 'em rn is that you wanna fuck me Janis: that's all they care about Jimmy: then I'll let you know when they show up Jimmy: like I said Janis: yeah? Janis: alright Janis: thanks Jimmy: nowt to thank me for Jimmy: blue balls is easy to fake when my dad's getting fucked more often than me Janis: 🎻 then Jimmy: 💔 but I got all those MB jams from last night in my head to mend it Janis: come through for you after-all Jimmy: he'll come to me forever now with those words of wisdom Jimmy: I'll never be free Jimmy: mind numbing job combined with mind numbing family life Jimmy: so few braincells Janis: what was it you said at the start of this convo Janis: need to let it go Jimmy: I can say what I like Jimmy: who are you Jimmy: let go of your fake being bothered Janis: fine Janis: have fun chatting shit to your customers then Jimmy: I survive on tips so I very much will Janis: don't know if sob story is the way you wanna go but Janis: you do you Jimmy: if you're sobbing, you do you Jimmy: probably get out of the mansion a bit more though Jimmy: it's fairly common out here Janis: boohoo? Janis: lemme dry my tears on a 50 Janis: what do you expect me to say Jimmy: don't say nowt Jimmy: shut up Janis: erm, say what I like Janis: who are you Jimmy: the one you're chatting shit to Jimmy: fuck knows why Janis: fucking hell Janis: what is wrong with you this morning Jimmy: the same thing that's wrong with me every morning Jimmy: but since you don't know me Jimmy: 1. it's news to you and 2. we don't need to go into it Janis: 👍 Janis: later Jimmy: 👌 Jimmy: [skip to lunch time when they'd show up & so would loads of other people lol] Jimmy: head's up, Juliet, your time to shine Janis: right Janis: okay, be there in 10 Jimmy: take as long as you need Jimmy: they ain't even ordered yet Jimmy: it'll look weird if you come through the door too soon after them Jimmy: like we planned it Janis: ha Janis: true enough Janis: they can kill a fair while, I imagine Janis: clean up properly then Jimmy: they can when they're too busy talking about us to pick up a menu Janis: ugh Janis: fun Jimmy: I'd forgotten Mia was still capable of speech Jimmy: I thought all the throwing up had destroyed her throat entirely Jimmy: she usually just communicates via 💀 stares Jimmy: I see why you two get on so well Janis: if you keep making me tell you I'm special and universally loved, you can't get mad at me for it, like Janis: and it's you that she's made the impression on Janis: that's Janis: nice Jimmy: getting mad at you for not taking a real compliment from your fake boyfriend ain't the same as not patting you on the back for being a dickhead Jimmy: yeah obviously hurry up or I'll run away with her Jimmy: won't be able to help myself & you've been warned Janis: highly doubt she can run Janis: bit cold to give her heart failure but I'm not crying here so Jimmy: I'll carry her then, more #goals anyway Janis: how Janis: she weighs sod all Jimmy: still get the rom com visual Jimmy: all that matters Janis: nah Janis: try and shift the big one Janis: that'd be something Jimmy: 😂 Jimmy: easy 💪🏆 Janis: can't just promise her free pastries Janis: that's cheating Jimmy: you can't just start imposing rules now Jimmy: too little too late Jimmy: & shamelessly cheating Janis: 🙄 she'd go with anyone for a cream cake Janis: even the least hot one Jimmy: like I said, easy Janis: ugh okay Janis: guess it counts as a win Janis: not happy about it though Jimmy: I'm not happy about doing my back in for her but Janis: needs must? Jimmy: you know Jimmy: how cute that we're finishing each other's sentences though 😍😍 Janis: 😂 Janis: if you could find a subtle way to let 'em know how goals we're being Jimmy: I've been 😍 at my phone since they came in, don't worry Jimmy: not an amateur Janis: good thing I stopped chatting or it'd be more like 😒 Janis: kinda cute but not really painting me in the best light Jimmy: like you said, only got one job Jimmy: I'll paint you in the best light you've ever Janis: 👍 Janis: you want me to leave it in the tip jar or bit too obvious Jimmy: where'd your sense of humor spring from? Jimmy: MIA a bit ago Janis: that was you Janis: cheek! Jimmy: can't be a comedian which you called me & a moody cunt which you may as well have Jimmy: make your mind up, Jenna Janis: if you can't do what I want and don't do what I don't, without any helpful direction, what kind of boyfriend are you Janis: tbh Jimmy: the fake kind Jimmy: & I'll fake owt you need me to Jimmy: starting as soon as Janis: 😍 Janis: you know the drill, yeah? Janis: swear I'll piss off long before they've even asked for extra sprinkles, probably Jimmy: not my first girlfriend or barista job Jimmy: but that is an offer I can't refuse Janis: spare us both the debrief then 👌 Jimmy: 👍 Jimmy: actually do hurry up though they're doing my head in Janis: you know they ain't gonna leave with me, yeah Janis: stunned into silence is a big ask, can try but Jimmy: I don't have to try Jimmy: it'll happen Jimmy: & I'll take it Janis: let the 💋 do the talking Jimmy: it will do Jimmy: louder than the bollocks they're chatting Jimmy: I told you, I know what I'm doing Janis: they do that, a lot Janis: should know better than me now Janis: I can try and avoid them out of school Jimmy: best customers remember, I do know Jimmy: & we're doing this 'cause I can't avoid them here Janis: exactly Janis: not forgot Janis: nor am I as dumb as them, tah Jimmy: skip the 'on the previous episode of the CG' bit then Jimmy: nowt you can tell me about any of 'em Jimmy: & even less I'd wanna know Janis: I ain't telling you anything Janis: it's all bullshit anyway Janis: whatever they're saying, that's a guarantee Jimmy: way ahead of you on that, sweetheart Janis: hope that's not the patronizing tone you settled on for your punters Janis: 😬 Jimmy: so you are worried about my job security Jimmy: well romantic 💕 Janis: I told you I weren't that bitch Janis: am leaving though Janis: be there in a few Jimmy: good Janis: what happened to take the time you need, boy Janis: only took a shower Janis: be grateful Jimmy: I said they're doing my head in Jimmy: & you already called me moody so Jimmy: tah for the romantic gesture of showering though Jimmy: 😍😍 Janis: so you gotta take every opportunity to be as sulky as? Janis: come on, I'll call you lots of better things if that's how it works Jimmy: do you want me to react to you kissing me like 😒 Jimmy: if the answer is yeah, take your time Janis: I thought you had this Janis: was your last gf a glutton for punishment or something 'cos no Jimmy: she weren't fake Jimmy: didn't have to pretend to be into it Jimmy: puts you at 👎 before you've kicked things off Janis: you said it weren't hard Janis: so which is it Jimmy: when did I ever say kissing you wasn't the bane of my life Jimmy: must've been drunk Jimmy: if I did Janis: grow up Janis: kiss's a kiss Janis: unless there's some unsexy scalding issue or similar Jimmy: not part of the deal, baby Jimmy: & no it ain't Jimmy: there's a whole scale of good & shit if you want me to rate you in a bit Janis: oh yeah! Janis: what girl doesn't want that Jimmy: if a kiss is a kiss what do you care Jimmy: don't matter, does it Janis: we don't trust each other, remember Janis: you'll just say I'm shit to be that dickhead Janis: and I know I ain't so who needs to hear more of your nonsense Jimmy: you don't trust me, I never said nowt about you Jimmy: I ain't that dickhead & I don't lie Jimmy: you're just shitting yourself about what the truth is Jimmy: that ain't my fault or problem Janis: sure Janis: your opinion ain't fact Jimmy: never said it were Jimmy: or that I give a fuck if you want it or don't Jimmy: I'm not 💔 that you don't like me Janis: you just called it the truth Janis: and you 100% said you don't trust me last night too so shut up, casual gaslighting here Janis: I wouldn't be Janis: don't like anyone, nothing to get upset about, ain't that deep, ain't that personal Jimmy: 🎻🎻🎻 Jimmy: how many times are you gonna try & tell me it ain't that deep like you don't have shit to lose if this fucks up Jimmy: you shut up, girl Jimmy: focus Janis: oh no, they'll bitch about me in cafes harder Janis: whatever will I do Janis: 🙄 Jimmy: end it then Jimmy: stop wasting my time Janis: as far as foreplay goes Janis: this is topnotch Janis: truly Jimmy: if I cared about you being turned on, we'd have bigger problems Jimmy: be in or get out Janis: don't worry, makes you the same as the rest of the lads Janis: I'm literally walking Jimmy: that ain't what I mean Jimmy: don't be a dickhead Jimmy: it matters to you or it don't so which is it Janis: come on Janis: ain't doing this for my health Janis: or a laugh, thankfully Jimmy: stop taking the piss then Jimmy: save your 🙄 for them on your way in & out Janis: alright, whatever Janis: I ain't asked you why you're really that arsed so you don't need to ask me Janis: it don't matter Jimmy: I ain't asking Jimmy: I'm telling you I ain't gonna keep threatening to pull the plug every time you have a strop Jimmy: & I'm the one who's acting 12, yeah alright Jimmy: sort your shit or leave me & it out Janis: oh my God Janis: who's told you to Janis: if emojis count as strops then you're fucked Jimmy: piss off Janis: literally just got here Jimmy: you're so fucking Janis: save it Janis: [comes in] Jimmy: [intense eye contact cos we know] Janis: [we know what happens not giving much chance for chat here] Jimmy: [just like we know he shamelessly ain't that good at faking anything] Janis: [when you have to bounce 'cos what was that] Jimmy: [the levels of hot it would be, I literally can't. It's a miracle they ever speak again]

"I do have thoughts on the potential baby and how it could play into the story along with what it would mean to Jon/Sansa as characters." I'd love it if you'd expand on this.

Anonymous said:Do you think Sansa will end up raising Jon and Dany’s child?

Anonymous said:I know you said you’ll do a write up and it’ll take a few days but can you please just answer this question: Will Sansa raise Jon’s and Dany’s kid?  

The original plan was to do a longer write up after the season was over but I’m going to do this summary instead. It’s still ridiculously long. It seems like there are a number of frustrations, to put it mildly, with this season. I’m going to dispense with this whole Jon bending the knee nonsense, because it isn’t happening in the books. Then, we can go into the potential baby.

First, and this is a big surprise to me, is how much impact dropping f!Aegon from the storyline is causing. Honestly, I thought it was a good idea when first learning of it and am still pretty sympathetic to the decision. However, D&D are still trying to create, with varying degrees of success, the dance of dragons we are going to see in the books. It’s this change in the source material that is leading to the stand off between Jon and Dany. To put it bluntly, Jon kneeling to Dany is going to be a complete non-issue.

I think it is extremely unlikely Jon will be crowned the KitN, that’s a show-only invention, given to him for a variety of reasons. Right now, I’m playing with the theory of Jon as a King of Winter since it better matches with his story. Jon isn’t going to be king, he is not going to be in a position to negotiate or offer up the north.

Now, let’s talk about the wight hunt which led to Jon’’s offer to bend the knee. Sure, the specifics of how it happened are stupid, but the entire damn concept makes no sense at all. The WW are an intelligent race, they communicate, they have weapons, they have a purpose, even if we don’t know everything yet. But, wights can not go south of the wall. It’s enchanted, it’s got spells. Remember the rotting hand with Aliser Thorne? Realistically, if this happened, the only thing Jon would have to show for his efforts is a rotting corpse. He could dig up a random grave and get the same results, with a lot less danger.

So, about the big meeting at the dragon pit. Again, that won’t happen either. In the books, it isn’t going to be some gathering of nobles in KL (it will be all blown up by then) that alerts the Seven Kingdoms to the danger in the north. It’s going to be Sam at the Citadel. He’s perfectly positioned to know when the wall goes down and happens to be where the single largest collection of ravens is located in all of Westeros. Honestly, this is one of the scenes I am looking forward to the most, I expect to be crying over it.

Back to Dany, as I said, the show seems to want to keep some version of the Dance. This is why Jaime’s character is all over the place, because in the books he’s already filed for divorce. It’s one of the reasons Euron’s story has been changed as well because he sure doesn’t want the IT. As for Tyrion, he’s not Team Dany and is not going to be interested in forging some sort of truce between her and Jon. He’s actually going to play Dany and Aegon:

“Dragons,“ Moqorro said in the Common Tongue of Westeros. He spoke it very well, with hardly a trace of accent. No doubt that was one reason the high priest Benerro had chosen him to bring the faith of R'hllor to Daenerys Targaryen. “Dragons old and young, true and false, bright and dark. And you. A small man with a big shadow, snarling in the midst of all." 

- Tyrion VIII, aDwD

In the books, I do believe Dany will land at Dragonstone, ready to conquer and take the throne. She’s going to be battling against Jon C. who will use Tywin-like methods in his efforts to secure the IT for Aegon. It’s going to be bloody, a lot of innocent civilians are going to be killed. There is a quote in the first (I think) Arianne gift chapter with a dragon dream that describes just how bad it will be. Dany’s conquest will come to an end after she blows up KL, killing an entire city’s worth of people. It’s only after this happens that Dany will finally turn her attention north to fight  the WW.

In the meantime, Jon will have no crown, no houses sworn to him, and he won’t have the Vale. Kneelgate ain’t gonna happen, at least in the books. There’s a ton more regarding Northern Independence, the GNC, the “Dance of Wolves”, and other stuff that plays into this too, but they all reinforce the same conclusion. They aren’t going to marry to join the north and south, they aren’t going to mary for some grand political union.

Ok, let’s talk about the Magical Targ Baby. As I said earlier, Dany is not barren and she never was. At least in the books, if Jon has a child with her, it will be a bastard. It’s just like Martin to give Jon what he most wants, a child and family in Winterfell, and what he wants least, the child to be born as a bastard like him.

Now, will, the two of them have a child together? Maybe. Possibly. We don’t really have enough information to know for certain. Whether this happens or not, I do believe Dany will not survive the series. She’s going to go out saving humanity from the ultimate form of enslavement, fulfilling the messianic role as the breaker of chains.

As for Jon, he’s a rather straight-forward monomyth hero. He’s interesting and well-done (at least to me) but not particularly unique as far as characters go. In the show, Jon has reached the final stage of his journey, freedom to live, and is singularly focused on defeating the WW. The truly fascinating part, is that it was Sansa who came along on his journey towards the end. Like, that blows my mind every time I think about it. Sansa was the one at his side while he finished his journey. How awesome is that? In the books, we don’t yet know how Jon’s return home will play out, he’s still in the underworld.

We also don’t know what will come after. Will Jon go out like Neo, saving the world? Or will he be closer to Rand and Frodo, still alive but no longer able to be part of the world. Or perhaps he is Odysseus, longing for nothing more than going home again?

Before I go any further, I want to state, that I am a Jonsa shipper. I hope/want (like desperately so) them to be endgame but I will not say that is the case because I just don’t know. None of us do right now. I’ve also been reading these books for years and have learned to keep expectations low when it comes to my personal wish list. So, to get to a point here, I am not advocating for or wanting a Magical Targ Baby.

Frankly, this season has left me kinda depressed with aSoIaF, forcing me to think about the potential endgame for the first time in awhile and I’m not enjoying it.

If Dany does get pregnant, there are two options I foresee, neither of which I like. Dany is either going to die in battle and her child meeting the same fate. Or, she’s going to give birth and still die. If that does come to pass, I do believe the child will be raised in Winterfell by Sansa. As I said, I don’t like these options. Martin loves his dead mothers (“Lady Stark. She’s dead.”) and the idea that he would do this to Dany really turns me off.

Now, if Dany dies while pregnant, it flies really close to the idea of a Magic Targ Baby as sacrifice and the theme of death paying for life. The other option is that Dany gives birth and then dies saving the world. I can’t figure out how to make this work (that wall is on the verge of falling) in the middle of the war for the dawn. If this happens, Sansa will be raising Jon’s bastard in WF, a repeat of what came the generation before. I find this problematic too. There are a number of implications here I find deeply uncomfortable. But, it fits with Sansa’s story and the mother theme that keeps appearing in her arc.

Now, as to how this relates to Jon and Sansa. I’m going to assume, for this post, that Jon lives through the end of the series. If this is the case, Sansa will still be raising the child and be the only mother it knows. If the two of them get married, or end up together, it will be based upon a relationship of respect and affectation that will grow to something more. I am not convinced we will see all or even most of that take place on the screen/page. We will get a dream of spring.

I could go on and on but hopefully this answers some of the questions sent my way today. I will also say that I play around with and mull over theories constantly and tend to be very slow to make a final decision on what will happen. Like my “Jon will be remembered as a villain” theory or my ever-favorite “Sansa will never marry but give birth to a bunch of bastards” theory. My tendency to do this is what has kept the books fun for me so long, the idea of possibility. So, these are my thoughts, as they are today, in this moment. Ask me again in a month and you may get a different answer. 

ETA: I’m not trying to depress anyone, sorry if this did. I’m trying to answer the questions as honestly as I can while also keeping my expectations low. I will also happily remove tags if they are upsetting anyone.