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jessequinones · 3 months

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Writing Advice: Chapters

A lot of my advice comes down to, having beta readers, and “it’s up to you” which doesn’t sound like good advice but when it comes to writing, everyone writes differently so there are different ways of doing the same thing. So, what’s my advice when I talk about chapters?

To me, a chapter is a section of the book which talks about a certain event. There’s no right or wrong way for how long the event should be, and there’s no right or wrong way of how the event can start or end. Here’s how I write my chapters and what I’ve learned along the way.

Starting the chapter:

Before I start the chapter, I need to figure out what the main event is gonna be. Will this event be informational? Action pact? Suspenseful? It can also be a combination of a few events as well, such as having my characters find information, but something goes wrong and now they have to escape.

After I figure out what the main event is gonna be, I start writing and once I complete that event I end it and move on. I try not to carry on too much after the main event has finished because I feel like my chapters might drag if I do.

Writing the chapter:

When it comes to a chapter, I try to have a beginning, middle, and end section. (Keep in mind this doesn’t work for every chapter.) Let me explain what I meant about those sections. The event in this example is Nix and Dante are tryna get information, but something goes wrong after they get said information. So the chapter starts at the beginning where Nix and Dante enter a secured location. The middle is where they get passed all of the alarms and hacked into the network. The ending is they got the information but an alarm gets triggered anyway.

Expanding the chapter:

So, I wrote the beginning, middle, and end, the event is done, but it was kind of boring. Let’s expand it to them escaping. This is where I think chapters start to become long. Some people combine two events into one chapter and some events are longer than others. Escaping a secured facility sounds more difficult than sneaking in. So, adding an escape attempt can spice up the chapter, but you need to be careful with how you do it.

I think when people complain about long chapters, one of their reasoning is “This feels like it could’ve been split into two chapters”. It might be the fact there are two separate events, both with their beginning, middle, and ends. If you want to expand upon your chapter, I would change how the beginning, middle, and end originally played out so it feels more natural when you go from one event to the next. This will take practice and beta readers can help if a chapter sounds too long or just right.

So instead of sneaking into a place, getting the information and having to escape. I would get rid of the middle part where Nix and Dante were sneaking and just show them entering the building, maybe talk for a few paragraphs before they reach their end goal because I already know escaping is gonna add several more pages. It’s a trial and error, and some readers might prefer the sneaking portion, while others might enjoy the fast pace. The end result is what do you like?

Continuing chapters:

What about chapters that don’t need a beginning, middle and end? Those chapters are what I call, continuing chapters. The most obvious examples of continuing chapters are the final climax of a story, like a big battle. The big battle might take multiple chapters to get through, and starting at the beginning, middle, and end of each chapter where the main event is the final fight, might get a bit tiresome. A simplified way of taking a large event, like a big fight, and breaking it over several continuing chapters is having each chapter be its own thing. Let’s say it takes three chapters to finish the final confrontation. The first chapter is the beginning, so there’s lots of build-up, but nothing too bad. The second chapter is the middle and is normally the longest out of the three. It’s the one with the most fighting and maybe a character dies at the end as a cliffhanger. The third chapter is where the villain is defeated and the fight is over thrust concluding the three sections.

That was a very simplified way of explaining continuing chapters, but yeah, not every event can be told in a single chapter, sometimes you have to space them out a bit. I would recommend letting the readers know that said event will most likely take a long time to complete so they'll be aware it's gonna be a long read.

Length of a chapter:

People often ask, how long should a chapter be, and there’s no real answer to that. Some can be a page, and I’ve seen others that are thirty. (Looking at you DragonFire). I personally don’t try to go for a word count or page limit. Often times when I try to make my chapters reach a certain goal, I find there’s a lot of filler that could’ve been cut. This is why I like to write my chapters as if I were writing an event and just focus on the event itself. If I need to expand or get rid of something, I can do that later.

My chapters are normally three pages in length, whenever I go over that, I try to tell my readers the next upcoming chapters will be long. This kind of tactic will depend on your story of course, but let’s go back to Nix and Dante.

In the example, Nix and Dante went into a secured location, took some information and got caught, now they needed to escape. If I want to add the escape portion in the same chapter because breaking in was kind of short, I might tell the reader before said chapter even began that “This mission won't be an easy one”, or “You’ll need to be real careful stealing the information because if you get caught, guards will come.” So, by the time Nix and Dante do get caught, the reader should be aware, the chapter will continue for a few more pages.

Oh yeah, if you’re gonna write a long chapter, make sure to have at least one smaller chapter to break it up. (DragonFire) Having long chapters, after long chapters, is, at least for me, very tiring. I don’t like to stop reading midway through a chapter, but reading thirty pages in a day is very difficult. So if you know you have some long chapters, throw in a few short ones.

Readers might also hate long chapters because they feel like there’s a bit too much filler in them. (Filler-in chapters aren’t the same thing as filler chapters).

Filler-in chapters might appear in one of two ways, either there’s too much filler to get to the main event, or there’s too much filler and the chapter should’ve ended already. Beta readers are a good way of telling you if there’s filler in a chapter or not. Keep in mind, that you, as the writer know what’s best for your story. Readers can only tell you how they feel. If you feel the “filler” part isn’t filler, but a lot of people say it is. Finding a workaround can be difficult. Unfortunately, I don’t have any advice on this kind of topic because this kind of writing problem is unique for every writer. Writing groups might be able to help as they’ll have your text and can help figure out what's going on.

Filler chapters:

There’s nothing wrong with filler chapters. Not every chapter needs to focus on the main story. I personally like filler chapters. They’re fun chapters which explore the characters and the world. A bit of a refresher after an intense fight is fine. When people complain about filler chapters, it’s often because there’s a bit too much of them. Or they came out of nowhere and killed the pacing. For example, if everything has been dark and gritty, having a chapter that’s more on the upbeat side is strange. Also if the chapter ends with a character's death and the next one ignores it, readers might not like that. This is one of the reasons why I don’t like POV swapping between every chapter. If someone dies in character (A) POV, and the next chapter switches to character (B) POV where they’re on the beach…I might get a bit annoyed. Even if Character (B) POV isn’t filler, I just witnessed someone die, I wanna know what’s going on and not swap to another POV.

Also filler chapters tend to be on the shorter side as well. If a filler chapter goes on a bit too long, then it might feel like the story is losing its focus a bit.

Beta readers can help point out which chapters are filler and where to add in filler if that's something you want to do.

Chapter Endings:

Ending a chapter is always interesting, do you want to end it with a cliffhanger or not? Does your chapter flow smoothly from one to the other? I don’t mind cliffhanger endings but try not to make every chapter a cliffhanger. At some point it becomes a bit much for some readers such as myself, I prefer to stop reading at a good stopping point. Cliffhangers aren’t a stopping point, I need to see what’s gonna happen next. Creating a cliffhanger after a long chapter, for me is a bit much. Long chapters already drain me, and forcing me to continue to get to an actual stopping point will make me enjoy your book less. (I understand no one is forcing me to read a book, but I just really, really hate stopping at cliffhangers). Not to mention if there are multiple cliffhangers in a row, I might put the book down and not pick it up for a long time because I’ll have no idea how many cliffhangers I’ll have to deal with before getting to an actual pause in the story. Personally, as a reader, I feel like there needs to be good stopping points. Places where it’s safe to stop reading and the reader can pick it back up later.

If you end a chapter in a city and the next one starts in a jungle, that kind of scene change might be a bit confusing so again, just send it through a couple of beta readers and see how you did with the transition portion of going from one chapter to the next. The same thing goes for tone as well. If the last chapter ends with a death, and the next one is in a circus, the tone shift might be a bit much. Just pass it along with a beta reader.

That’s about it for chapters. If you want some more detailed advice on certain chapters then let me know, but chapters are one of those things where it comes with practice. The length, the event, the ending, all of this stuff will be determined by your ability to write. Beta readers are a great way of pointing out how they felt while reading a chapter and you can go from there.

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m-y-fandoms · 5 months

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Commission: DRV3 Boys x Female Reader - Seven Minutes in Heaven

Details: Takes place during the killing game, timeline switched around, creative license taken to imply everyone is alive and has known each other for at least a few weeks and has had time to get to know each other a bit. The threat of the killing game is still there though. Monokuma has announced it, just nobody has been killed yet. It’s also implied that the reader has a crush on the boy in each section however whether or not the boy is oblivious to that fact or feels the same varies.

Word Count: 5K Words

Warnings: SFW - fluff, maybe mild angst, possible V3 spoilers

Everyone needed something to divert their attention and obsessive thoughts away from the killing game. Though nothing had happened yet, the group of Ultimates got more and more antsy by the day. Every dark corner or empty stairwell seemed like a threat, and mistrust grew and loomed over them all like a black mold growing on the walls.

No one seemed to feel safe, though it had been weeks since the menacing-looking monochrome bear informed them that they were to kill each other for sport so they could return home to their regular school life and families. There was no concrete proof that this wasn't an extensive, well-planned practical joke or social experiment, some prank that would result in cameramen and producers springing out of the woodwork once all was said and done, and that was the only thing holding them together mentally. This could all be fake.

Nevertheless, something needed to change. They all had their little subgroups, individual trusted cliques or closest allies, but there was no denying the entire group needed to come together, to get to know each other a bit better and let off some steam. Unity meant potential lasting peace and no fatalities.

Someone suggested they play a frivolous little game that could keep everyone's attention for a while. Even though most of the group hadn't played it since middle school and some never at all, the rules were straightforward and simple enough. In addition to passing the time, it might even spark a little drama or romance. Any emotion was preferable to the fear of death and the sense of impending disaster.

Seven Minutes in Heaven: a game where two people go into a small room or cramped closet alone and have seven minutes to do anything they want to each other. Usually, the goal was the get handsy, to kiss or hug, to confess to someone, to make each other nervous, or to engage in casual romantic activities. It was supposed to be steamy and awkward, to put pressure on the two people. They would all randomly pick straws, and the two people who got the shortest straws would have to go in together while everyone else sat outside and timed their seven minutes. Knowing your peers were mere feet away outside the door only added to the tension.

The location was set: a small, cramped closet on the first floor next to the spare classroom and just before the steps down to the basement. It was dimly lit by an ancient overhead lightbulb hanging on by a thread and had just enough room for two people once the abandoned supplies, tools, and cobwebs were scooted to the edges. The Hotel Kumasutra was suggested first, but was shot down for being perhaps a little too intense, dramatic, and high-pressure for such a simple game. Nobody felt comfortable enough to enter the daunting building as of yet, despite its proximity to the popular casino.

And so, the game began.

Rantarou Amami

Waiting anxiously to see who you'll be paired up with, you pace the meager few steps you can manage in the tiny closet - back and forth, back and forth - working up a sweat that's more nerves than physical exertion. When the door swings casually open and you immediately see a fluffy full head of green hair, a shiver runs down your spine. It's a shiver that is half excitement and half humiliation. Of all fifteen other classmates, of course your crush, Rantarou Amami, was the one destined to draw the other straw and be trapped in here with you for seven excruciating minutes. Anyone else, literally anyone else, and you could've stalled, talked your way through those seven minutes, felt indifferent, and at most a little awkward. Rantarou made your heart flutter, froze you in place nearly every time he interacted with you. You stuttered, felt like you never said the right thing. He was just so handsome, with a smooth voice and a mysterious yet kind personality. You were quite sure, even with the memory loss you'd all suffered, that you hadn't had a crush this intense in quite a while. Certainly not one that turned you into a foolish mess.

Rantarou entered with his head bowed, shoulders shrugged forward. You'd never seen him - a dude who was usually quite confident and smooth - looking so uncomfortable. When he spun to look at you, the door now shutting you two in alone, he was almost wincing, facial expression squeezed into wrinkles and furrowed brows. It was as if his face was trying to say: "I'm sorry about this..."

"Heeeeey, (Y/N)," Rantarou spoke in a sing-songy voice that, again, was out of character for him, yet you felt your body stiffen up all the same. You hugged your body instinctively, feeling vulnerable as your heart beat wildly in your chest. You took a step back to create more space between you and the object of your infatuation and nearly tripped over a cardboard box on the ground behind you. "Yeah, this is about what I expected," he chuckled, his eyes wrinkling closed into kind little lines. He held his hands out in a sign of passive surrender. "So sorry about this, (Y/N). I swear, there was nothing I could do! It was all random." He rubbed the back of his neck, a small dust of pink over his cheeks. You felt your stomach drop. Did he think you disliked him? Was he perceiving your involuntary reaction as disgust rather than flustered? You suddenly felt super guilty. You were just now realizing he probably had taken note of this same adverse reaction every single time you were in the room with him. The logical thought process would probably be that your body language showed disdain.

"Oh, oh no, I hope you don't think I'm upset about being paired with you! I didn't realize my-" you tried to relax your shoulders, not wanting to let your own feelings affect him negatively.

"No, I don't think that at all, actually..." he cut you off, not wanting to let you get too far into this incorrect notion. He paused, thinking over how to word things delicately. "It's quite the opposite. I'm not as dense as you might think, actually. I pick up on things pretty well," he chuckled again, trying to ease the tense atmosphere, "and I... I kinda know you like me. You always get like this... when I talk to you. I'm... a bit more perceptive and empathetic than people think. I just wanted you to know, it's okay! You don't have to feel that way! I was worried about your reaction when I stepped in here. I knew you'd freak out." So subtly - almost seeming practiced and experienced - he gently clasped his rough hands into yours. They felt calloused, perhaps from the travels and adventures he'd vaguely mentioned when you sat there like a statue listening to him talk around the academy. The many bracelets settling on his wrists shook you back to reality, and your face heated up at the skin-to-skin contact. "I mean, I'm not trying to boast because I really don't think I'm such a catch, but I see the way you look at me, I've heard Miu talking about you having a crush as well..."

"I... I don't know what to say," you release a breath you didn't know you'd been holding, "This is a bit embarrassing..." you grumble, looking at the ground.

"You don't need to feel embarrassed. Honestly, I think you're a really cool person as well. I would love to get to know you more, but you always seem to run away after we talk for a little. The others are always around. It would be cool to spend some time hanging out alone, now that... I'm kinda confessing that I'm interested in you too?" He gives you a crooked smile. "Woah... your hands are like shaking."

Was this a dream? Was Monokuma replacing your classmates with clones to prank and humiliate you? There's no way Rantarou, the most attractive and fascinating guy here, was into you...

"I... I would really like that. Yeah, I'm sorry about my... less than pleasant reaction. I really didn't mean to come off as weird or make you uncomfortable."

"Hey, no worries. Well, you know, I played this game a ton in middle school. It was always silly, and stupid, but I have no issue playing it again, especially with you. What do you say? After all, I've played games way worse than this."

Ryoma Hoshi

The athlete strolled leisurely into the closet, hands in his pockets and the stick of a lollipop hanging carelessly out of his mouth. He always had something hanging out his lip, be it a candy cigarette, a toothpick, or something in between. You wondered if it soothed him. You'd gathered from conversations with him that his life had been pretty traumatic, at least in your opinion. His eyes were half-lidded as always, lazy and donning dark bags underneath. He sighed, stepping into the dim lighting provided by the single, dingy bulb above.

"Yeah, so I didn't really have anything better to do. Everyone else was sayin' they'd play and I was in the room at the time so I got roped in. Can't be much worse than anything else I've been through. Figured it might be good for morale, for these people to loosen up and play a game or two together. Lotta mistrust brewing." He looked around, seemingly disinterested and boasting an incredibly calm demeanor. You were wondering how someone could feel not even a little bit nervous playing a game with a premise like this.

"You don't have to stay if you don't want to!" You smiled softly, offering him an out. You liked Ryoma a lot. His chill attitude, mysterious and interesting past, deep voice, and cute face intrigued you enough to even form a little crush, but you didn't want him here out of coercion or peer pressure.

“It’s whatever. I’m down to play. It’s fine. However, I’m sure I wasn’t who you expected or were hoping for.” He shrugs, less self-deprecating and more as if stating a plain fact. It didn’t seem to bother him either way if you did in fact wish it was someone else who was chosen to be with you for this dumb little game.

“Nah, I’m not disappointed,” you smirk a bit deviously, trying to hide the excitement you truly felt. You see his eyebrows raise a tad, which is more expression than you usually get from him. “Someone like you is kind of an interesting partner for this game. I’m betting you have more life experience overall than me. In fact, I know you do, after listening to some of your stories. You probably have more experience in everything: street smarts, common sense, even romance.”

“Uh, let me stop you right there.” He lets out a tiny, brief, dry chuckle, something skeptical in his tone. “Actually, not true at all, that last part. Not much romance in my life. Funny, you and I actually talk more often than I do with the others… I thought you would’ve picked up on that.”

“Oh?” You challenge him playfully, trying to flirt him into a more open mood.

"Yeah, I'd think that would be obvious. Who wants to take a chance on a no-good criminal with a clouded, ominous past? I don't really tell people all the details, and I'm not going to, but then I can't be surprised if people don't want to get to know me or trust me. Also, I'm aware I'm not the ideal, looks-wise. Never bothered me, but-" Once again, you can tell he's not looking for sympathy, but just honestly sharing his thoughts about himself. Before he can talk himself down further, however, you cut him off.

Stopping his words in their tracks, you leaned down to his height, bending at the waist sensually. Without skipping a beat, you casually took the lollipop from his mouth, coaxing it out without much resistance on his part. Smiling impishly, you popped it into your own mouth.

You'd never seen Ryoma Hoshi blush before this moment. It seemed like something he was incapable of.

Korekiyo Shinguuji

The lean, dangerously mysterious anthropologist stood across from you, tall enough and so close that he blotted out the dim light from the single bulb above in the cramped closet. He appeared like a silhouette, like some spooky demon or spirit from the cultural legends he often told you about. He seemed to be giggling behind his mask, amused at your flustered reaction to his closeness before he began to speak in that mystifying voice of his that was like smoke hissing past your ear and tickling the outer shell:

"You know, (Y/N), I almost said no to playing... This seems like such a childish little game, maybe even a waste of my precious time when I could be studying up on literally any other topic. But... then I thought: I've done far more promiscuous things than this before, games and rituals alike, so what's the harm in some little kid’s game? Why not? After all, there's something to be learned from every experience, and this game seemed integral to the middle school lives of our classmates, therefore making it culturally significant... if I... broaden my definitions a little." He rolled his eyes up to the ceiling, making you sweat as he moved even closer during his little monologue.

"I see you're being v-very open-minded," you chuckled nervously, trying to hide the loud pumping of your heart. "Yes, I would've thought you were far too mature for this game!" You were now flat against the wall, nearly caged in by his lithe form hovering over you.

"I thought it might even be exciting," his tone adopted a more predatory note, "to see who I get and explore the essence of who they are, find their inner beauty for myself, one-on-one and in private. When nobody else can hear or see, they might let down some walls, and expose a side of themselves in this killing game that nobody has seen yet. It could be a fascinating study of human behavior. I didn't really care who I got matched with, as everyone here - with such varied personalities and talents - could be an extremely interesting subject!"

"Subject?" Now he was starting to worry you. You had to admit, though, the way he was passionately speaking, the way he pinned you into the corner of this enclosed space... it was rather exciting.

"You seem nervous..." he tilts his head innocently. "There's nothing to be afraid of, little (Y/N). This game, as I take it from the rules, is to start a romantic or flirty interaction, to cause feelings to bubble up in each other - excitement, arousal. These emotions are so wonderfully and beautifully human. Is that what you want, to try this in earnest?" You see one of his hands reach over to its opposite and begin to unravel the layers of gauze bandaging. You nod enthusiastically, almost entranced by his words. He takes this consent as his opportunity to take control, and something in his golden eyes turns animalistic.

"Good." He purrs.

Gonta Gokuhara

Almost comically shoved into this tiny closet and leaving little to no room for you was your chosen-at-random partner: Gonta Gokuhara, the gentle giant. He was desperately trying not to hit his head on the ceiling while also trying to remember to be considerate of you and your personal space. It was the gentlemanly thing to do, after all.

"Gonta wanted to play, because all of his friends were playing too! This game... sounds fun, but Gonta never played it before. Gonta a bit confused. Gonta love everyone here as a good friend, swear to protect them all, so why we not all play game together, in bigger, more comfortable place?" He asked genuine, thoughtful questions, and it appeared to you that he in fact did not know what he was getting himself into. You'd make sure he understood clearly before playing, as someone had obviously shoved him in here without a clear description of the rules or goals.

"Well, Gonta, this is a game where you're supposed to come in with one other person only and do flirty, cute, romantic stuff. Why did you agree to play without knowing what's going on?" You shook your head, snickering under your breath. You'd always found Gonta's endless positivity and determination to make others feel happy and protected adorable. He probably just wanted to be included, to make sure everyone had fun. And you had no doubt he was intelligent enough to understand the simple rules of this game, it was just very likely someone more mischievous - like Kokichi or Miu - purposely kept him out of the loop.

"Oh! O-okay!" He begins to blush, his mouth pressing into an uncomfortable, pursed line. "Gonta never done anything like that!" He was beginning to perspire on his brow.

"Well, do you want to try? You don't have to, keep that in mind! It's your choice, Gonta." You smiled in encouragement, making sure your body language wasn't applying any pressure to him even subconsciously.

"Ummm... Gonta would like to try if everyone else playing. Also!... Gonta trust (Y/N)." His words are shaking, and you decide you'll do the bare minimum, just a warm-up to see if he truly means his words. Him putting his trust in you was melting your heart.

Gently, as if you were approaching a bird that might fly away at any moment, you took a step closer to him and began to unbutton the tight brown suit jacket from his abs and waist.

Kokichi Ouma

Immediately upon being trapped in the closet with this gremlin, he started teasing you, trying to make you crack, or cry, whichever came first. All reactions were good reactions to him.

"Of all people, you got stuck in here with me. Sucks for you, don't it, (Y/N), you prude!" He swirls a finger in the air and presses it firmly into your chest, taunting you.

He spends the next few agonizingly drawn-out moments poking fun at you, at your flustered reactions, at the way your body responds to both his words and small touches.

"Oh, come on, (Y/N), this is baby shit! I barely even touched you! With my title as Supreme Leader, I've had to seduce hundreds of marks into giving up information or giving me what I want, and you can't even handle this? You wouldn't last two minutes in an interrogation by my organization, let alone seven. Pathetic!" He starts laughing, amused by your humiliation so much that his eyes begin to water.

You're sure his claims of seducing and interrogating victims before are lies, but regardless, your heart was beating out of your chest. Why did he have this effect on you? He had you right where he wanted you, and you were falling into his trap. Every time he ran his chilled fingers up your exposed arm or touched your chest and collarbones, you felt a shiver of desire and fright, a shockwave of panic and delight in tandem.

In truth, the others were worried about you. Most of them, the kinder portion of the group, felt bad about sending you in there alone with Kokichi. They didn't think such a kind, unassuming person deserved this kind of treatment.

With an underlying gentleness that almost betrayed his performative vitriol for you, he pushed your shoulders back, like a bully on a playground. He took note of your clumsiness, of the lack of coordination you must have if such a petite young man like him could nearly topple you over. He seemed to be taking into account his lack of time. Seven minutes wasn't much to work with. He'd had his fun, and was ready for the climax.

You stumble back against the wall, and instantly he pounced on you, cornering you in. Before you had time to adjust, to correct yourself to an upright position, he grabbed both sides of your face, pulling you in for a sloppy, deep kiss that lacked any care or gentleness. Your eyelids flew open as the taste of sweet candies and grape sodas flooded your mouth.

Kaito Momota

Kaito stood with his arms crossed defiantly in the middle of the closet. His taller frame and masculine figure took up most of the space as he stood firm, stubbornly biting the inside of his cheek. His brow was furrowed angrily, but not with an anger directed at you. After all, you must've been a victim in this just as much as he.

"Now, I didn't really wanna do this... it's beneath someone who sees fit to call themselves the Luminary of the Stars. I didn't earn this title through kiddy games after all, but..." he looked frustrated, maybe even with himself, "but they tried to say I'm too scared to play! As if!" He paced once in a circle in the tight confines, then huffed. "I'm realizing just now that I probably fell for it and this was their plan all along." He sighed deeply. "I gotta stop letting these assholes get to me." He conceded, his pride hurt. You had to admit, his reaction to the game was disappointing you, as you couldn't think of a better person to get stuck in here with. You smiled sheepishly, letting the uncomfortable silence mellow out in the air. You only had seven minutes, after all. "Man, it's cold and awkward in here..." Ah, yes. Kaito wasn't the type to let things just be silent. You decided it was your turn to speak now.

"So... you don't want to play with me, at all?" You speak shyly, a bit embarrassed at your own words.

"What, you do?" He counters, a single brow raised as you piqued his curiosity,

"Well... I mean, haha," you thought through how to word this so as to not weird him out or scare him off, or really just embarrass yourself in the process, "I felt really lucky to get stuck in here with you, out of everyone. If I may speak openly and honestly, I've been crushing on you for a while..." You felt your blood running hot.

"You have?" He's flushed pink, pulling his jacket in closer for security.

"Yeah, of course! You're handsome, charismatic, and you make me laugh when we are just hanging out casually. I think your determined spirit is admirable... but if you don't feel the same-"

"No!" He cut you off a little too eagerly before he could remind himself he was supposed to be playing it cool. He cleared his throat, calming down his tone a bit, "No, I mean I think you're great, too. And you're beautiful! Out of all these idiots, I'm glad it's you, too." Your heart swells. "Not that... not that I've been dwelling on this thought for too long." Though it feels like your heart is pumping fast enough to warm the entire room, Kaito was right, it was quite drafty in there. Seeing you shiver at the temperature, Kaito removes his large galaxy jacket and wraps it around your shoulders. It smells of him, of hair products and fresh deodorant. Simple and subtle. "We should hang out some more on our own, when we want to, not when these assholes force us into some stupid game with expectations and shit." He shows you a beaming, celebrity-like grin. "I would be an idiot to not want to get to know you more, especially with your talent!"

Shuichi Saihara

Poor Shuichi. The reserved, introverted detective had found himself shoved into this closet against his will. He'd merely come to observe the game from the farthest corner of the room - bored, and too wary of the threat of the killing game to be alone. Being alone was just the worst option right now: either his own thoughts would consume him or a potential killer might.

So now here he was, paying the consequences of wanting to hang out with a group of his peers. They'd put his name into the lottery without his permission, thinking it a cute and funny little prank, and when he was chosen, it only took two or three of them to shove him inside while he attempted to jump and claw his way out. Now he was a sweating, blushing mess, pawing at the door like a cat trapped in a bedroom. The same students that pushed him in snickered and howled in laughter on the other side, leaning their weight into the door so he couldn't escape. After a while, someone as smart as him knows when an effort becomes futile. He sighs, turning to face you with a warm flush of red over his entire body that contrasts wildly with the blues and blacks of his hair and uniform tones.

"Ugh, I'm so sorry, (Y/N)," he groans, his voice cracking under his nerves. "I told them I didn't wanna play, but..." were you really that bad to be stuck in here with? His reaction seemed... over the top. Your shoulders sank downward, humbled by his response to your existence in the same space as him. He sees your crestfallen expression and panics, guilt overcoming him. "Please, no it's not you! I mean no offense. I didn't wanna come in here with anyone." He takes note of how your mood doesn't pick up in the slightest, and lets his head fall into his hands. "This is so embarrassing. I actually do really like you, this is just so awkward."

"You do?" Your ears perk up at that. Maybe you were mistaken in your earlier judgment.

"Yeah! You've always been kind to me, and you're quite interesting and fun to hang out with in this hellhole. Talking to you... really gets my mind off things..." he admits, clearly self-conscious. "I... well sometimes, I hear you talking about how you think you'll be the first victim of the killing game, talking down about yourself. I don’t think you should count yourself out... we all have our own strengths, though I know I ought to take my own advice sometime." He chuckles in such a gentle, exhausted way that it might as well have been merely an exhale.

Neither of you even noticed that during his little speech of praise toward you, he'd reached out and taken your hands gently in his own. It was a reflexive, instinctive, and intimate move. Rather than pull away, now feeling a bit more stable, and comfortable in sharing his thoughts as you hadn't reacted adversely, he pushes a bit further. He rubs his thumb across the back of your hand, and for seven minutes, that's enough for him.

Kiibo / K1-B0

The almost-human robot is standing across from you, arms flat by his side. He looks far more relaxed than you were, passive and maybe in some kind of rest mode, if he had one.

"Now what?" He asks plainly.

"Nobody told you what to do?" You replied, a bit stunned and wondering why he was even here.

"Vaguely. It sounded like a complete waste of time, though. If it's what humans do, it's certainly not in my programming. Therefore, I might as well learn from this experience as not to be embarrassed later on should the topic come up again." He sounded so practical, so... bored with the current situation.

"Well... I don't know how much you were told but this game is about emotions, feelings... touching and flirting, making the other person nervous and flustered, seeing how far you two are willing to go with each other… in a romantic kind of way. It's uniquely human... it may not be productive for you if you can't comprehend-"

"I have plenty of emotions and feelings! I can understand it perfectly fine!" He retorted, offended and seemingly embarrassed. You didn't know he could get embarrassed. Maybe he could in fact enjoy this game to its fullest. You intended to get something out of this experience. This could be fun. You had to admit, you'd been curious about the extent of Kiibo's understanding of human interactions and emotions for a while now. You wondered how much he could feel, emotionally and physically. If you pulled his hair, would he cry out? If you scratched his thigh, would it bleed simulated blood? There could be a lot of room for exciting discovery that awaited you.

"Well then, I'm curious..." you reach a single, cautious hand outward and stroke his hair. It's stunningly soft. It feels shockingly real, not like some cheap synthetic wig or some type of rubber or metal shaped to mimic hair. Kiibo did something like a vibration or shudder, a chill running down his spine. You wondered if this was a programmed response, all artificial and planned, or if Kiibo's free will really extended that far. How real did his creator intend for him to be? For what purpose was he truly built? What did a scientist stand to gain from making a feeling, loving, human-like young man? You could see a war machine or an endless knowledge bank easily being worth the time, but Kiibo didn't seem to excel in pretty much... anything. "How does that feel?"

"I... I don't know. It's making me... relax? I think that's how you'd describe it. I feel like I am running on low power and sluggish, but in a good way? On purpose..." he speaks softly.

"And this?" You run a hand down his pale cheek, and it's warmer than expected, though below a real human’s body temperature for sure. You're so focused on touching the simulated, soft, supple skin, that you don't even notice Kiibo's eyes blown wide open as if scanning you, entranced and staring almost through you. It was safe to say he might have been touched-starved, unused to the sensation.

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howtofightwrite · 6 months

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For super-powered individuals, if we assume the standard of characters being stronger, faster, more durable than normal, is there a reasonably thin enough material (i.e. not just 5 inch thick hardened steel) that a super strong individual could carry to be bullet-proof (enough), presumably in some form of plate armor where you can still be agile?

Not exactly. The problem with armor (in the context of armored vehicles) is that you can just hit them harder. Something that can stop a .50 round might not do so well against a guided explosive munition, and if that fails an artillery strike. But, against a roughly human foe, those anti-material rounds would probably get the job done.

So, let's stick with your hardened steel solution for a moment. A .50 BMG round will penetrate ~1.5 inches, but for the sake of argument let's say 2 inches. That's a pretty good defense against a sniper with an AM rifle. However, this is also used in heavy machine guns, where you're looking at a cyclic rate of ~750-850rpm. In a situation like that, your armor might hold up to a short burst, but probably will not survive multiple bursts in the same area. As is often the case, the real problem isn't the bullet with your name on it, it's the 20 or 30 buddies who wanted to swing by for a fun time.

This leads to another problem. While bullets punching holes in you is bad, your armor taking a hit can be pretty unpleasant in its own right. A .50 BMG will deliver somewhere north of 14k joules of force into the target. That's enough for the bullet to do some pretty unpleasant things to a person in the armor, even if the armor itself isn't compromised. This a large part of why there isn't any armory rated to soak a hit from one of the AM rifles. (The Russians claimed that their Ratnik-3 armor would be able to... and then it never really appeared. The claim was someone dubious to begin with, but that's a much larger, and wilder, rabbithole than you're asking about.)

For a normal person, wearing high end body armor, hits from normal combat rifles (intermediate and high power rounds) can result in broken ribs and internal hemorrhaging. It's not just about your armor being bulletproof, it's about your armor being able to effectively dissipate kinetic force as it's received. If it doesn't do that effectively, the bullets may get the job done, even if they don't manage to penetrate the body armor.

On an individual level, simply adding more armor isn't a particularly efficient solution. It makes sense to a point, but if you're already saying someone is super-humanly strong, and tough, covering them in steel plate isn't going to make them immune to harm.

Beyond that, there have been experiments with developing combat exoskeletons, to allow normal soldiers this kind of protection. The aforementioned Ratnik-3 was the Russian program, while the American project was named TALOS. TALOS was scrapped sometime before February 2019, citing technological limitations. So, this isn't a new concept.

Something I found deeply amusing is the “See also,” section on TALOS's Wikipedia page includes a link to Crysis. For those unfamiliar, Crysis was a first person shooter set in the distant future year of 2020, which would have come dangerously close to matching the intended schedule for TALOS, if the project had continued.

Powered exosuit research is probably not dead, even if TALOS has been scrapped. It may be a bit further out than was originally expected, but it is a reasonable bet that it will happen at some point. There are a lot of technological hurdles, including both the issue with the armor failing under direct fire, and dealing with kinetic force, but, at least from an optimistic perspective, it's somewhat plausible.

Unless you're talking about vehicles, modern armor isn't about adding more metal, it's about being more efficient with dissipating the kinetic force from a hit, and still survive to do it at least a couple times.

That said, whatever you do come up with, it's likely that the old adage will hold true, if force doesn't solve your problems, you're probably not using enough of it. No matter how good your armor is, it won't survive sufficient application of high explosives.

Even ignoring all that, a Type IV plate will still take a hit from most rifles (up to and including .30-06 AP rounds.) You don't need fantasy armor for that, it's something that already exists. Real world body armor is designed to take hits. Full plate was designed for melee combat. Neither one is particularly good at doing the other's job. That's not a limitation of the materials or technology, it's a function of what the armor is designed to deal with.

Back when dinosaurs roamed the earth, one of my scoutmasters warned us that if you use a knife as a screwdriver, you'll break it. It has an intended purpose. Trying use that tool, (whether it's a knife or body armor) for a purpose other than it's intended ones, will usually end poorly. (Of course, I also remember a crayon eater who was rather vocal in his opinion that the USP's only effective use was as a hammer.)

If you want to put a character in fully enclosed armor, take a look at Ratnik-3 or TALOS armor. If you just want a character who's unusually durable, and you're willing to go for (low key) superpowers, you don't need special armor to get that idea across.

-Starke

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#writing reference #writing advice #writing tips #how to fight write #starke answers

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eg515 · 11 months

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I want to tell you all a bit about what is currently happening in Hungary because once again the government chose Pride Month (which is in July here) to attack the lgbtq+ community. Three news from just the past week: queer books are wrapped in plastic in bookshops, a bench painted in rainbow colours started a war in Budapest, and a law about retirement was modified to specifically exclude trans women. I'm sure others posted about these, probably could put it better than me, but here it is in one place.

Books: two years ago the government passed a so-called "child protection" law, but it's most commonly reffered to as the anti-gay law. The law is supposed to protect children, but it bans all media depictions of anything that would "promote homosexuality" or different gender identities.

The law is hard to understand on purpose, to make it unclear what is against the law and what isn't, resulting in the censoring of everything even remotely not cishet in fear of accidentally breaking the law. One notable example of this is commercials on tv. All media "promoting" homosexuality or gender change has to have an age restriction on it, including commercials. But since it is unclear what this means, now all tv ads have a 12+ rating, on every channel.

Previously bookstores which sell lgbt themed books had to make this clear and separate these books, which resulted in many bookstores having signs on their doors saying they sell these books. Some bookstores were fined for failure to comply.

Last week people started noticing that in the biggest bookstore chain, Libri, certain books were wrapped in clear plastic. This all happened because of the anti-gay law. Books including lgbtq characters are now wrapped in plastic and cannot be sold at the YA section of the store, they are moved to the adult section, regardless of the topic. Multiple writers called this out on social media, finding their own books wrapped up and moved.

Once again, since the law in unclear, Libri is wrapping up random books, because there is no clear guideline what goes against the law and what doesn't.

From literally two hours ago: one of the biggest bookstore chains, Líra, was just fined for 12 million forints (approx. 35k dollars) for selling Heartstopper without the wrapping, in the YA section.

The Bench: last Thursday, Amnesty International, with the permission of the mayor of the district, painted a bench in Budapest rainbow colours.

This was supposed to symbolise love and acceptance, especially during Pride Month. Since then, the bench was painted 6 more times. First, two men belonging to the neonazi fanclub of the local football club painted the bench the club colours, green and white. Amnesty International filed a police report, and painted the bench back to the rainbow colours.

Then the bench was painted green and white by two football fans yet again, this time with the message "stop lmbtq". After this, someone painted it back to brown, and left a note saying "I just want to be a bench. Which is good for everyone. To you. To them. To us."

After this Amnesty International repainted it with the rainbow colours. Then just today, a right-wing party, Mi Hazánk painted it red-white-green, the national colours, and stated that they will offer protection to the football fans, they will do the sane painting to any rainbow coloured anything they find anywhere in the country, and if anyone paints over it, they will file a police report for damaging a national symbol.

update: just a few hours after the last painting, unknown people wrapped the bench in plastic, with the message "Lately LGBTQ+ content can only be in public in wrapping", referencing the plastic wrapped books

The transphobic retirement law: back in 2010, Fidesz, the current ruling party made a promise during its campaign, which since then became a law. Currently this "Nők40" (Women40) law allows women to retire after 40 years of work, including time spent raising a child, as a way to honour women.

In 2006 the EU ruled that transgender people are entitled to retirement according to the gender they are when retiring. In line with this, earlier this year a Hungarian court ruled in favour of a trans woman, allowing her to retire after 40 years of work, due to the Nök40 law. It is worth noting that she has legally changed her gender in all her offical papers in 2013, and only found out in 2021 that the pension payer still had her registered as a man, and due the transphobic Law 33 passed in 2020, the pension payer refused to correct her gender. The court later ruled in her favour though, and she can retire.

Now, a member of Fidesz argues that this ruling is "a gross provocation and a slap in the face of the legal system". She urged lawmakers to changed the law and make it clear what they mean by women, reminding everyone that Fidesz still maintains that there are only two biological genders.

This was yesterday. By today, a change in the law was prepared. The announcement said the law has been clear for everyone with common sense, but to avoid any "sensitized" judge using this legal loophole, they are now amending it so it stated the early retirement is for everyone who "worked as a woman for 40 years". They claim now nobody can just decide to suddenly want to be a woman for early retirement after working as a man for 39 years. Because obviously early retirement, in a country where it is impossible to make ends meet just on pension alone, is the main reason someone would "decide" to be trans. Obviously.

so, this is where we're at in Hungary, two days before the Budapest Pride Parade. another Pride Month, another attack on lgbtq rights. I don't really have a point with this, I don't want to guilt trip anyone. Just spreading the word, since we rarely read about non-usamerican news.

#yeah i still hate it here #hungary #lgbtq rights #eu politics #pride month #lgbtq+#lgbtq+ rights #trans rights #transgender #books #censorship #lgbtq books #lgbtq+ books

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randomfoggytiger · 2 months

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Kibbe Body Types, Part 1: Gillian Anderson

Building off of the Kibbe Body Types primer post here, we jump straight into Gillian Anderson of The X-Files fame.

David's up next, don't you worry! I'm tackling GA first because I have ample information to fact and figure my way through the system (and because it's slim pickings finding fashion advice for men's body types); and thought I'd get the convoluted, detailed analysis out of the way on this post so we don't retrace our steps in the next.

Onwards~

**Note**: If you want to skip right down to Gillian, search for Gillian Anderson: the Results header.

KIBBE BODY TYPES: A SHORT SUMMARY

(You can skip this section if you just want to know Gillian's frame, proportions, and Kibbe Type-- no sweat off my back.)

David Kibbe constructed a system that measures the soft and structure, short and tall, wide and narrow, yin and yang of the body frame: its skeleton, its curves, its musculature, and its fleshiness. It's strictly a practical science that explains how best to dress to balance out one's natural features, regardless of weight gain, weight loss, or aging. This system is not about correcting the "flaws" of a person's body, but understanding why a garment, accessory, etc. does or does not naturally suit the lines of the body.

Kibbe used to have 13 types (that included pure Natural, pure Classic, and pure Gamine) but recently winnowed them down to ten.

(**Note**: I have written about them in more detail-- with pictures included-- in my previous post mentioned above. Highly recommend.)

(Credit to: Aly Art)

Dramatics have the most yang of the body types: tall, lean, and narrow vertical lines, with the least amount of softness to their flesh ("fleshiness."). They have long bones and sharp curves that are best accommodated by long, clean lines and long silhouettes (no color blocking.) Their hair looks best in clean, carefully styled lines-- geometrics, blunt cuts, etc.-- without too much of a wispy or tousled appearance. They do best without waist emphasis or shorter lines in their outfits, appearing to advantage in long, boxy silhouettes.

Soft Dramatics have the Dramatic Type structure with added softness to their curves, giving them a full-bodied, "heavy" voluptuousness (as opposed to a delicate weightlessness.) They look better in soft but weighty fabrics, with big, rounded silhouettes and lines that curve around their figure and emphasize their waist. Again, like Dramatics, they need carefully styled hairs, looking undone tousled hair or too much wispiness.

Flamboyant Naturals are midsize to very tall, with width and bluntness to their elongated frames. Their very pronounced wide shoulders and narrow waist and hips create an unmistakable T-shape (and have been the sought-after body type for runway supermodels since the 90s.) They look their best in big, oversized, relaxed fits; big, tousled, crazy hair; long, vertical lines without color blocking. Nothing too stiff or too delicate and weightless.

Soft Naturals are normally midsize to slightly smaller, with wide, blunt edges to their elongated bones. Their more proportionate frames and softer flesh on their arms and legs help them appear more "womanly" than FNs. Slightly tousled, slightly crazy hair; a slight waist emphasis; and long, unconstructed lines layered with different fits, patterns, and colors look best on them-- "feminine undone", in other words. Anything too stiff make them appear "heavier" than they are.

Dramatic Classics are midsize to tall, with a very balanced, symmetrical frame proportionate to their length and width. They have a touch more yang to their skeleton: a bit more sharpness in their bones, a bit squarish in the face and shoulders. Clean, symmetrical, sharply tailored outfits look best on them; and they are able to mix the angularity of men's and femininity of women's styles if they keep their lines in the right places. Hair is incredibly important to maintain-- keeping their dead ends cut regularly is a must.

Soft Classics are midsize to petite, with a very balanced, symmetrical frame proportionate to their length and width. They have a touch more yin to their skeleton: a bit more softness to their flesh, a bit more roundness to their proportionate edges. Symmetrical, clean, "every hair in place" look is best for them; with a touch of yin to balance the touch of softness in their flesh. Well-tailored, lightweight fabrics and polished hairstyles look best on them-- not too stiff, not too delicate; not too tousled, not too structured, not too layered. Hair is incredibly important to maintain-- it makes or breaks their look.

Flamboyant Gamines are midsize to tallish, an uneven mixture of opposites with a predominant yang majority. They have a smallish, rectangular figure-- small Dramatics (without the long vertical line.) "Tailored, color blocks, irregular shapes, mishmash-- they can mix whatever they want." Hair can be in any shape or style they want, unless it is long; in which case, it must be "crazy." Their waist does not need to be emphasized; and cropped lines will always look good.

Soft Gamines are petite, an uneven mixture of opposites with a predominant yin majority. They are small and rounded, often feeling awkward, puffy, or overweight (when they are not) in super feminine lines: their bone structure is slightly too angular-- though still fleshy-- to be comfortable in completely yin fits. Lines should be crips, color blocked, with waist emphasis: "puffy things with very precise ends." It's best when clothes are fitted at the neck or shoulders or elbows or wrist or waist or hips or knees or ankles; and in between those points, the material can be relaxed, with gathers or looser knitting. "Feminine or weightless things should have added weight: color blocking, bright colors, etc. Hairstyles that are feminine and tousled look best. Cropped lines will always work best.

Romantics have the most yin of the body types: midsize to petite, with a very curvy, "lush", feminine "fleshy" roundness. Their bones are short and slightly wide; but still appear delicate. "They look best with waist emphasis, weightless fabrics, and gentle silhouettes. Gentle colors, slightly transparent fabrics or lace, flowers, gentle ruffles-- everything that is weightless and not super stiff. Same with hair: something that will still have body and some femininity-- curly hair, wavy hair... if straight, it can be slightly longer. Delicate things should present in their look."

Theatrical Romantics are midsize to petite; and are "the same as Romantic but with thinner bones. They are still short, but thinner. They are not as wide-- imagine a narrow hourglass-- small hands, thin fingers. They look best in small, ornate, and sophisticated clothes."

BEGINNING OUR PROCESS OF ELIMINATION

I'm going to be using Aly Art's body type quiz (here); and pictures from her and Merriam Style's quiz (here.)

David Kibbe is adamant that height be factored into the body types-- women's bodies, particularly-- so we shall begin our journey there.

Dramatics: 5’9"/173cm and up

Soft Dramatics: 5’7”/170cm and up

Theatrical Naturals: 5’11”/180cm and up

Soft Naturals: 5’5”/165cm and up

Dramatic Classics: 5’5”-5’8”/166-172cm or thereabouts

Soft Classics: 5’5"-5'6”/164-169cm

Romantics: 5’5"/166cm or thereabouts

Theatrical Romantics: 5’2”/157cm or thereabouts

Flamboyant Gamines: 5’6”/168cm and under

Soft Gamines: 5’2”/157cm or thereabouts

As we can see, Gillian at 5'2" can only fit into Gamines, Romantics, or perhaps Classics. We shall see how this shakes out.

TAKING A (SHORTENED) KIBBE BODY TYPE QUIZ

The purpose of David Kibbe's body type quiz is (or was) to identify the visual weight-- the presence or gravitas-- of the bone structure. To loosely quote Merriam Style: "The first thing we want to think about when we think about bone structure: are the bones longer-- offering a lot of structure to bear up visual "weight"-- or are they smaller and shorter-- offering less support for heavier visual weights?"

An overall view is crucial: two body types can share nearly identical faces; or one person can have a lot of yang in their facial features but have dominant yin in the rest of their body; or any other disastrous event can happen that will topple the whole franchise.

We're eliminating B options from this list (as they pertain strictly to Natural Body Types), as well as two questions in Kibbe's original quiz (which he has either loosened or tightened restrictions on, respectively.)

Question 1 - Shoulders

A's shoulders are long, narrow, and sharp

C's shoulders are symmetrical, even, proportionate to the body

D's shoulders are sloped, narrow, tapered

E's shoulders are sloped and rounded

Question 2 - Arms and Legs

A's arms and legs: elongated and narrow

C's arms and legs: moderate, in even proportion to height and upper torso

D's arms and legs: small, slightly shortish

E's arms and legs: very short in proportion to height and upper torso

Question 3 - Hands and Feet

(A top left; C top right; D bottom left; E bottom right)

A's hands and feet are long and narrow

C's hands and feet are moderate-- not too narrow, not too blunt, not too long, not too short, not too pointed

D's hands and feet are small, narrow, and delicate

E's hands and feet are small and slightly wide

Question 4 - The Overall Shape of the Body

A is elongated, lean, and sinewy

C is symmetrical, evenly proportioned

D is very short, delicate, and softly narrow

E is very short, delicate, and softly wide

Question 5 - Bust and Torso

A's bust and torso are flat and taut; and tend to stay flat even with weight gain

C bust and torso are moderate, in even proportion to their waist and hips

D's bust is shapely, curved, and more prominent than my waistline; torso is short and collects more flesh when gaining weight.

E bust and torso is very prominent and lushly curved, no matter their weight.

Question 6 - Waistline

A's waistline is elongated, but "boyishly" tapered

C's waistline is moderate, slightly defined, and not overly cinched

D's waistline is very small in proportion to their bust and hips

E's waistline is softly defined, but tends to be slightly wide

Question 7 - Hipline

A's hipline is tapered, straight, "boyishly" narrow

C's hipline is moderate, in even proportion to bust and waistline

D's hipline is shapely and rounded, more pronounced than waistline

E's hipline is softly rounded and wide, no matter their weight

Question 8 - Upper Arm and Thigh Flesh

A's fleshiness is long, lithe, and sinewy

C’s fleshiness is moderate

D’s fleshiness is soft, slightly short

E’s fleshiness is very soft, slidely wide, fleshy

Question 9 - Jawline

A's jawline is sharp-- either very pointed, very prominent, or very square

C’s jawline is moderate, symmetrical, not very sharp or rounded

D’s jawline is delicate, tapered, or slightly narrow

E’s jawline is rounded or softly wide

Question 10 - Nose

A's nose is sharp and prominent

C’s nose is moderate-- not very rounded, not very sharp, not very blunt

D’s nose is delicate, tapered, narrow

E’s nose rounded or softly wide

Question 11 - Cheekbones

A's cheekbones are high, prominent

C’s cheekbones are symmetrical, moderate

D’s cheekbones are delicate, narrowed, slightly rounded

E’s cheekbones are rounded

Question 14 - Cheeks

A's cheek softness is taut and flat, even with excess weight

C’s cheek softness is moderate, soft, but not puffy

D’s cheek softness is soft and fleshy; may get “full” with excess weight

E’s cheek softness is very soft, very fleshy, very round; even without weight fluctuation

Question 12 - Eyes

A's eyes are narrow, straight, closely spaced, or almond-shaped

C’s eyes are evenly spaced, symmetrical, moderate sized

D’s eyes are rounded, slightly close together, possibly almond-shaped or up-turned

E’s eyes are very round and very large

Question 13 - Lips

A's are narrow, straight, or thin

C’s lips are moderately shaped, neither too thin or too full

D’s lips are slightly full and rounded

E’s lips are very full, very rounded, very luscious

Results

Majority Cs points to the Classic Body Types (Kibbe no longer stands by this pure classification)

Majority Cs with several As or Bs points to Dramatic Classic Body Types

Majority Cs with several Ds or Es points to Soft Classic Body Types

Majority Es points to the Romantic Body Types

Majority Es or Ds with several As points to Theatrical Romantic Body Types, or Majority Ds

Majority As and Es points to Gamine Body Types (Kibbe no longer stands by this pure classification)

Majority As and Es with several Bs points to Flamboyant Gamine Body Types

Majority As and Es with several Ds point to Soft Gamine

Gilian Anderson: the Results

Gillian has an overall short, delicate, softly narrow body (D): moderate shoulders (C); small, slightly shortish arms and legs (D); small, narrow, delicate hands and feet (D); a bust and torso in even proportion to her waist and hips (C); a proportionate hipline and waistline (C); delicate, tapered jawline (D); soft and slightly short fleshy arms and thighs (D); delicately rounded cheekbones (D) and cheeks (D); delicately tapered nose (D); very round, very large eyes (E); and very full, rounded, luscious lips (E).

In summary, GA has 8 Ds, 4 Cs, and 2 Es.

Thus, we can conclude Gillian Anderson is a majoirty D type, meaning she is a Theatrical Romantic: delicate, petite bone structure with a touch of yang that narrows the soft width of her features. She looks best in waist-emphasis outfits; small, delicate patterns; and carefully groomed, softened hairstyles.

THEATRICAL ROMANTIC DESCRIPTION

Here is a transcription of David Kibbe's book I've taken from Aly Art's video here:

I'm going to read you the full description of the Theatrical Romantic Body Type by Kibbe from the book Metamorphosis....

Note: The following information should be taken as a broad outline of what makes a Theatrical Romantic. It is the overall combination of extreme yin with a slight yang undercurrent that creates this image identity category....

It is a delicately radiant physicality that is combined with the powerfully magnetic essence. Height: normally moderate to petite, usually 5'5" and under. Body type: soft and voluptuous, although trim and smallish as opposed to wide and "bulky." Hourglass figure-- curvy bustline and hips with a waspish waist. Soft or fleshy arms and legs. Bone structure: small and delicate. Slightly sharp edges: shoulders, jawline, cheekbones, or nose. Small hands and feet (in proportion to height.) Facial bones are small, delicate, and slightly sharp. Facial features: soft and lush. Large, luminous eyes-- sometimes slightly upturned, sometimes slightly "bedroom." Full, luscious lips; soft cheeks. Hair: soft and luxurious to the touch, maybe very silky and wispy or thick and wavy, curly. Coloring: any coloring is possible-- warm or cool, high contrast or blended-- but a Theatrical Romantic usually is quite vivid with a delicate complexion that is luminous or translucent. If overweight, the figure will remain hourglass with a defined waist. Upper arms, thighs, and face will become quite fleshy. Theatrical Romantic will normally not be extremely tall; have large, wide bones; have large hands and feet; have extremely prominent facial bones or features; have a "boyishly" straight figure devoid of a defined waist.

What's interesting about Gillian is that she is one of the rarer Theatrical Romantics-- one without a huge bust (which is one of the too oft used hallmarks of both Romantic Types.) Again, further proof that the whole must be taken into account instead of just a glance and a guess.

Other Theatrical Romantic women include: Ann Margret, Heidi Lamar, Jada Pinkett Smith, Jane Seymor, Jean Harlowe, Mila Kunis, Morgan Fairchild, Salma Hayek, Selena Gomez, and Vivian Leigh.

COMPARING THEATRICAL ROMANTICS TO OTHER TYPES

I'm going to be heavily quoting Aly Art throughout, as it will save me a lot of time and mental energy.

Dramatics

Theatrical Romantics are the second softest of all the types, with yang "drama" of their frame only differentiating it slightly from pure Romantics.

Dramatics, however, are the most yang of all the types-- "more elongated, more angular, more square and more sharp" in each angle of their silhouette.

Soft Dramatics have the sharper, elongated bones of the Dramatics-- again, making TRs appear shorter in their height and limbs-- but with layer of soft flesh overlaying their silhouette. While "fleshier" than Dramatics, they will still "appear heavier, bigger, or more pronounced."

(Left Photo: TR Gillian Anderson, left; D Cate Blanchett, right.

Right Photo: SD Christian Bale, left; TR Gillian Anderson, right.)

Naturals

Flamboyant Naturals and Theatrical Romantics are very, very different. "Flamboyant Naturals look taller because of their longer vertical line, and they consist of blunt edges-- more squarish shoulders, more squarish figure. Even when they have a waist (sometimes)... you perceive them as straight, not... as curvy women. When you look at Theatrical Romantics, you perceive them as curvy women" (even if their actual measurement ratios happen to be less curvaceous than a fellow FN.) "Theatrical Romantics look shorter...."

"Soft Naturals are slightly wider in bones-- in their face, in their body, in their ribcage sometimes, in their hip area sometimes. They look a bit stronger and a bit taller; and with this blunt bone structure they have a softness on top. Theatrical Romantics have thin bones and are shorter; but on top of that, they have lush roundness."

(Left Photo: FN Amy Adams, left; TR Gillian Anderson, right.

Right Photo: SN Helen Mirren, left; TR Gillian Anderson, right.)

Classics

Soft Classics share softness in common with Theatrical Romantics; but Soft Classic looks much more moderate.... Doesn't look as short or petite" (even if the Theatrical Romantic isn't a petite 5'2".) "They have something in common; still Soft Classic doesn't look as lush, and also looks... more proportionate, more symmetrical in general."

Dramatic Classic are more angular. They look taller; they look more moderate in size; they can be slightly more squarish and slightly broad; they might have slight musculature. And Theatrical Romantics do not: they're much softer; they're small looking; they're not angular; they have more delicate bones, thinner bones; and they're not as symmetrical. And sometimes outfits that look amazing on Dramatic Classics look pretty severe and "dry" (opposite of "lush") on Theatrical Romantics.

(TR Gillian Anderson, left; SC Meryl Streep, right.)

Gamines

"Flamboyant Gamines can look slightly elongated in their smallish frame: they are not tall, they are not big looking, they are pretty small looking. Sometimes they can be slightly broadly angular; sometimes they can have some muscles. Can be slightly squarish in the shoulders-- they can be slightly squarish in general." In comparison to Theatrical Romantics, they can appear more "electric, tomboyish." (Two classic examples are FG Penelope Cruz and TR Salma Hayek.) "Flamboyant Gamines' arms can be more elongated; their legs can be a bit more elongated They can look more straightish in figure. And Theatrical Romantics look pretty delicate-- they have shortish hands, shortish legs, shortish arms."

Soft Gamines and Theatrical Romantics are often confused because SGs are "small and also can have sharp bones, and figure, and soft flesh, and roundness. But again: Soft Gamines are slightly more angular than Theatrical Romantics. They are more "playful" looking because of the angularity in their chin, in their shoulders; and Theatrical Romantics are not angular to the same degree. Soft Gamines also skew more "girlish" than full-figured "woman" in comparison to TRs-- "but not always!"

(Top Photo: TR Gillian Anderson, left; FG Jimmy Kimmel, right.

Bottom Photo: TR Gillian Anderson, left; SG Reese Witherspoon, right.)

Romantics

Romantics are the softest of all the types, lacking the extra sharpness or "drama" of the Theatrical Romantics. "Normally, their shoulders are rounder. Also, Romantics have slightly wider bones-- also petite, also short like Theatrical Romantics.... Theatrical Romantics have slightly thinner bones; and Romantics, wider bones."

LINES, SILHOUETTES, AND OTHER FASHION DETAILS

But how do we dress the illustrious Gillian Anderson?

Again, I quote Aly Art quoting David Kibbe:

Shapes should be rounded, intricate, and ornate with slight sharpness at the edge. You might not look as good in geometrics; in chunky or bulky shapes; in sharp, severe shapes.

Line and silhouette: silhouettes should be hourglass, emphasizing the curves and showcasing the waist. The waist should be sharply defined, and the shoulders should be crisp. Tapering at the wrists, hemline, and knee areas. Lines should be soft, draped, flowing, clingy, ornate, and intricate. You might not look as good in all-severe silhouettes; in all oversized or unconstructed silhouettes; in all straight lines; in all sharp lines; in all wide or horizontal lines; in all long vertical lines that hide the waist.

Detail: details should be intricate, ornate, delicate, and quite lavish.... excess detail trim is important to help frame and focus the face. Bows, soft ruffles, and sparkly applique are excellent. Necklines should be soft and draped or sheered and gathered. Shoulder tucks, gathers, and bouffant shapes are perfect. Sleeves should be tapered at the wrist. Delicate and ornate buttons and trim are advisable. Waistline should always be emphasized: gathers, sheering, and draping at the waist are necessary for softness and intricacy.

You might not look as good in plain or minimal detail; in sharp or severe detail; in extremely oversized, bulky detail; in symmetrical, subdued detail; in crisp, perky detail.

CONCLUSION

We now know the yin and yang of Gillian's bone structure, which will help teach us what silhouettes, lines, shoes, accessories, hairstyles, and even hair colors would suit her best.

But that's another post for another time.

Thanks for reading~

Enjoy!

#Kibbe Body System #Kibbe Body Type #GA #Gillian Anderson #txf #but not #fashion #randomfashiontiger #this took... a while #though not as long as the primer #anyway: hope you enjoy!

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dk-wren · 5 months

Text

Buddy Daddies Week - Papa Rei's Onigiris

Welcome to Day 6 of my Buddy Daddies anniversary celebration week! I am so excited for today (even though it got a little delayed) as I present to you...my attempt at Rei's onigiris from ep. 9!

In all honesty, it's something I've been wanting to do for a long time. And I'm so glad I finally had the time and special occasion to do it! Since episode 9 premiered, I always thought Rei's choice of filling sounded different, but good. Maybe that just says something about my taste buds/food preferences. I don't know.

Anyways, the three fillings I used in my onigiri were based on what Miri, Hinata, and Kotori described in theirs. So, I used strawberry jam, Choco Rings (aka chocolate Cheerios), and grape gummies. I don't think it was specified what flavor of gummies was in Kotori's onigiri, but based on what I thought would taste or pair the best, I went with grape.

Here are my "ingredients:"

I made about a half a cup(?) of rice and was able to make 5 rice balls (of varying sizes). In the end, I made 2 rice balls with Choco rings, 2 with the grape gummy, and 1 with strawberry jam. Here's a cross section of a rice ball with Choco rings as I was attempting to shape it.

After I finished making/shaping the onigiris, I let them sit for an hour to cool down before putting the nori on it.

And finally...the finished product!

But how did they taste, you might ask? Well I got you!

I tried the Choco rings onigiri first because that was the one I thought I would like the best. In all honesty, I was a little let down. I think it was a personal/"chef" error because I forgot to let the rice cool down before making them. As a result, the cereal got soggy, so it didn't have a crunch, which would have added to the its distinctness. Likewise, because it got soggy, I think the cereal lost most of its flavoring since I snacked on some beforehand and could definitely taste the chocolate flavoring. There was a bit of sweetness when taking a bite with a large concentration of the cereal, but otherwise the cereal to rice ratio was not that great (and I was left mostly with rice with a hint of sweetness). Final ranking - 3rd

The second one I tried was the strawberry jam onigiri, which I thought would be my least favorite. Perhaps it was because I was let down by the choco ring one, but this was one ended up being my second favorite. This onigiri was on the larger side, but I was able to (unintentionally) spread the jam more evenly across the whole rice ball. This meant every bite had a bit of sweetness to it, and towards the center, I could really taste the strawberry flavor. What was even better was when I got a bite of the rice, nori, and jam. The flavors of each part mixed pretty well and created a pleasant taste.

The last onigiri I tried was the grape gummy one. This one ended up being my favorite. The ratio of rice to gummy was really good, and the grape flavor was really strong. That being said, because of consistency of the gummy compared to the rice, I was left with more gummy at the end of my bite.

Final Ranking:

Grape gummy onigiri

Strawberry jam onigiri

Choco Ring onigiri

Thank you for reading about my attempt to recreate Papa Rei's onigiris and indulging in my chaos with me! I genuinely had such a fun time doing this.

On another note, based on my personal struggles/difficulties that came up while making these, I can somewhat understand how the rice balls got their shape. If Rei made them with the inexperience I did, he might have not waited for the rice to cool before making the rice balls. Thus, trying to make them round or give it any type of shape became difficult. Likewise, each topping messed with the shape in comparison to how much rice there was for that specific onigiri.

Thank you again for reading and following along as I attempt to cook/make something (I am not a cook by any means and I think everything above supports that claim)!

-Dakota Wren

#buddy daddies #buddy daddies anime #dk wren's bd celebration week #buddy daddies anniversary #papa rei's onigiris #i barely know how to cook so i improvised...like a lot

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cchanticleer · 10 months

Text

I'm still rankled by the lack of good refs for robin's clothes so i got more

As far as i know there's not a single bit of official art that shows them in their default tactician digs without their coat on so it's come to drastic measures, digging in to the actual models.

Fates, as seen above, offers the most complete look. In this version the coat is an entirely separate thing, and underneath it the clothes are fully modeled and textured. I used paragon to remove the coat; i'm not sure if you'd ever be able to see this all in-game normally. Maybe the coat goes away with clothing damage? I'll have to check later.

getting at things in other games is more of a pain, but worth looking into.

To be clear: I'm not looking at coat here, just what's underneath. TBH i was mostly personally interested in seeing what their golden collar bit is attached to. often when people draw robin's clothes they go off of this fan-made reference sheet, which adds a little mini jacket thing which i personally don't like the look of no insult to the creator it's just not my jam which is why i spent so much time trying to fine accurate refs while I always just assumed it was a part of the coat itself. Turns out we're both wrong!

I know the first model you'd want to look at is the one from Awakening itself, but unfortunately i couldn't find a rip of the model on first glance. BUT, while pulling usable models straight from the game files is out of my wheelhouse, i CAN pull the textures. So we'll look at that instead.

Here's the body textures for f!Robin from Awakening. It's a bit tricky to parse, but from what i'm seeing the parts of the clothes that are covered up are unsurprisingly not modeled/textured. The skirt-thing is almost the same, though the gold band running across the middle of the back segment is smooth instead of having two sharp bends. Other than that I don't see very much of note.

Next: Warriors. I got the models from here. I haven't touched blender in years but i remember just enough to tear things apart and see what's underneath. Looking at unpromoted m!Robin once again.

I only bothered to delete what was covering things on one side because it's all basically symmetrical, half's enough to get the idea. Again, my first priority was seeing what the collar was attached to, and it turns out the answer to that is "not much". They didn't bother modeling the whole thing, reasonably assuming that it'd never be seen. You can see that it's definitely its own garment separate from the coat and the top, but beyond that there ain't much. What we can see doesn't match the design from fates, though. I'd figure that it doesn't match because there's no point in adding details that no one'll ever see, but that's not where the changes end.

Here's the lower body, where we can see that the back of the skirt-y portion is completely different. In Awakening (as far as i can tell from the textures) and in Fates it's two segments, the smaller front segment and a second, larger segment that wraps all the way around. In this, there's four, with a matching front and back and matching sides.

Also there's a few points on the belt section where things are clipping through each other, but i'm pretty sure that was a part of the model as i got it and not a result of my cutting things up. Whether that's how it is in game or something that's happened when it was ported to blender, i couldn't say.

Last is Smash Bros.

I'm gonna be honest i had sort of run out of steam at this point and since i didn't see any models that had already been conveniently formatted for blender i kinda phoned this one in.

I looked around just long enough to see that a) there's even less of the collar piece modeled, it stops as soon as it's covered by the coat and b) the skirt-y thing is once again in two pieces. Here's the textures if anyone wants to try and parse em

I guess there's also codename: steam

I am not going to check codename: steam

In conclusion i spent entirely too much time on this but maybe someone will be able to use this mess as reference idk

#fire emblem awakening #robin #robin fire emblem #fe13 #cosplay reference #reflet #fire emblem warriors #smash bros ultimate #idk man #mod #i meant to queue this not post it now but tumblr is inscrutable

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mask131 · 8 months

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Have you thought of looking at the lore of the World of Darkness? It is the overarching world of Vampire the Masquerade amd Werewolf the Apocalypse, with a lot of unique takes on traditional folklore, religion, and mythology. I'd like to see what you think of it

Unfortunately you wouldn't see much what I think" about it because when it comes to World of Darkness I usually gobble things up and loses most critical thought X)

I am a HUGE, HUGE Changeling the Lost fan, and I also do enjoy a lot the Vampire the Masquerade lore. I only have a vague knowledge of the Vampire the Requiem remake, and I need to get into it in more details one of those days - and from what I understood and saw Changeling the Dreaming was indeed a bad game that Changeling the Lost surpassed in all ways. I did take a plunge into Werewolf the Apocalypse - especially because of the big evil company led by eldritch entities of chaos (that was my jam), though I have no knowledge of its remake - and I also did plan earlier to take a look at the two Mage games (but never could for now).

All in all I am a sucker for most World of Darkness/Chronicles of Darkness products - in terms of lore however cause I can't play them, but from what I udnerstood a LOT of people are just here for the lore and if they have to play they use the Vampire video games.

Though if you want my opinion for the actual over-arching world - I will confess, I actually do not care. I enjoy the lore and worldbuilding and twists of each games on its own, but when it comes to tying them all together into one universe I surprisingly find it the most boring part. Unless it is very well made, I tend to skip all the sections of books about crossovers.

As for "WoD vs CoD", I am a man who likes both and thinks they complement each other. WoD was the original, the start of the trend, ad it had this distinctive feel that you can't recreate anymore of the 90s/2000s Gothic and horror and dark urban fantasy - even though it also aged badly in some aspect, and alongside its best-sellers and masterpieces it had some really bad and flat instalments. CoD learns from its mistakes, takes new fresh twists, and brings a whole new ground of thought, inspiration and art to the table - and I will be forever thankful for Changeling the Lost. But I have to admit that several CoD games also lose a bit of the specific feel and specialty that made Wod special, resulting in several instalments either feeling too generic, too simplified, or just making them look pale and weak compared to their predecessors.

So overall it is a mixed bag.

If I ever made World of Darkness posts, it would be exposition posts where I just collect all info and shoot them back again X) Not much personal critical thought. But if people dig this up, why not? My original "creepy media" posts for the spooky season were the Magic the Gathring ones - but they are not doing quite well, so I can switch to posts about World of Darkness if that's what my audience wants! I just need to conclude the series of post for Dark Ascension that is stored in my drafts, and then I could switch to the White Wolf games

#world of darkness #chronicles of darkness #new world of darkness #changeling the lost #vampire the masquerade #werewolf the apocalypse

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alfheimr · 1 year

Note

how did you do that xray color effect on that law picture?

short answer: adjustment layers

long answer (gore cw and eyestrain cw):

i started with a base painting. i initially really wanted to do something like those old nasty anatomical cross section illustrations but i couldnt get it to look right and i got tired of trying to draw actual anatomy. my solution was to draw muscle fibers and uhh "bones" as new layers, which i set to color. those got merged with a duplicate of the base, which is going to be clipped onto my next magic trick.

on a new layer, i scribbled some swooshes in. i started just with black and then added the white later, and ill be honest i dont remember why i did that or if it makes a difference? anyway here you can see how it looks when the layer is set to normal mode.

i clipped the duplicated painting onto the scribble, so now you only see the muscly bits on wherever the scribble is. clipping masks are my best friend. please do not worry about the number of copies of layers. i do not have a problem.

i do not remember why i even did this but i duplicated the b/w scribble and inverted the colors. obviously this is the, idk, "sculpted" version, which is why its got more stuff going on. this is how it looks when the layer is set to "normal."

i am very sorry for how this text looks but the plain grey background doesnt really do much at all to show how exclusion works, and i didnt want to have a giant block of neon red because it hurt my eyeballs. anyway, you can see that wherever the white is gets inverted so now theres blue instead of red. when i do this sort of thing i kinda just go ham with different brushes, colors, and adjustment layer settings to see what works and what doesnt. the xray effect was ultimately the result of me going "hmmmmm i wonder what this button does" and rolling with whatever comes out. and im pretty pleased with the result!

(edit) here is a post with other examples of how i misuse adjustment layers and then Here is my lil zine where i talk a LOT about process things if you want to see more of this sort of breakdown!

#process

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six-costume-refs · 1 year

Text

Costume Breakdown: South Korean Production

Finally got around to doing a write-up on the South Korean costumes! So without further ado, a few general notes:

The costumes were seemingly all made by UK-based teams and makers. More detail below on each.

As a result, there’s not really any major design changes from the more recent UK costumes. Unless otherwise noted, you can assume that most details are pretty standard.

As always, the boots were custom La Duca. They were most likely embellished by Crystalled by Jane, who had done all the UK boots from very early on, but I couldn’t confirm that. Cleves has the usual thigh highs, but everyone else has a single strap (the double thickness) which the UK has slowly been standardizing to.

The actors, with a few exceptions, seem to be wearing their own hair rather than wigs.

The actors have the Roman numeral earrings.

The actors have the same glitter IEMs style as the UK cast.

As usual, the actors have makeup looks that line up with the popular styles in their country. In line with K-beauty trends, these queens generally have more subdued makeup looks than what we've usually seen in the US/UK and sometimes Aus.

Aragon: 이아름솔 (Lee Arum-soul) and 손승연 (Son Seung-yeon/Sonnet) I can’t confirm who made these costumes. They were possibly made by WhiteStar Costume, who made the most recent West End cast change Aragon costumes. It also might have been made by Rainbow Mascots, who made Jarneia Richard Noel’s costume for Hampton Court. Just like all other recent UK costumes, there’s black threaded through the chains of the necklace. Lee Arum-soul has her straight bob with peak-a-boo black/blonde coloring. Son Seung-yeon has her curled blonde hair. For both the front sections are just pulled loosely back; this isn't out of the norm historically, but it does differ from the French braids that are slowly being standardized in the US/UK/sometimes NCL.

Boleyn: 김지우 (Kim Ji Woo/Jennifer) and 배수정 (Pae Su-jeong/Shannon) Most recent Boleyn costumes have been made by White Star Costumes, but I’m not positive that these are. This costume uses the darker monotone green vinyl. It was introduced for Broadway with reopening, but has only been making its' way over to the UK in recent months. The skirts are also proportionally wider and longer than most recent skirts. Kim Ji-Woo has her bangs styled to the side and front. They both have green clip-in hair extensions.

Seymour: 박혜나 (Park Hye-na) and 박가람 (Park Ga-ram) These costumes were most likely made by Kirsti Reid. Just like all other recent UK costumes, there’s black threaded through the chains of the necklace.

Park Hye-na has a little bit stronger of a side part to accommodate her widow's peak, while Park Ga-ram has a stronger center part (although usually still styled slightly to the side). The softly styled front is in line with typical US wigs, but differs from most UK which usually is pulled fairly straight back.

Cleves: 김지선 (Kim Ji sun) and 최현선 (Choi Hyun-sun) The costumes seem to have been made by Paul Aspinall. He has been the primary UK Cleves costume maker in recent years.

Both queens have a front bump with small buns, in the same style as what Rachel Rawlinson wears on the West End. They also have a temporary red hairspray used on the front and separate red bright red extensions added to the back of their hairstyle, although it seems like there's been some variation and change in those specifics even throughout the run.

Howard: 김려원 (Kim Ryeo-won) and 솔지 (Solji) The costumes may have been made by Rainbow Mascots, who made Aimie Atkinson’s costume for Hampton Court, but I can’t confirm that. Note that Solji has flat boots due to an injury. Just like most other productions, Kim Ryeo-won and Solji have a ponytail hairpiece attached over their own hair. At the time of their debut, every other current Howard’s hair was pulled directly back into that ponytail piece. Instead of that, both have a side part with hair pulled to either side and a few small wispy bangs. (Note: Lou Henry has since debuted with a side swept front style as well)

Parr: 유주혜 (Yoo Ju-hye) and 홍지희 (Hong Ji-hee) The costumes were made by Ashleigh Cherry Costumes, who has been the primary UK Parr costume maker in recent years.

Both actors have the same front bump, braid, and back ponytail that we’ve been seeing become standardized for non-Black Parr actors. The ponytail sits lower here than for most other variations of the hairstyle.

———————————

Aragon: seo_rin1212, arumsoooooul, _shannon1025_, peachpitch99, sonnet_son, _shannon1025_

Boleyn: posted by jennifer_luanari but unsure of origin, posted by jennifer_luanari but unsure of origin, jennifer_luanari, sophia_n_h, _shannon1025_, _shannon1025_

Seymour: jjang_beautiful, soul.g_heo, jennifer_luanari, hbiiii._.iin, jennifer_luanari, _shannon1025_

Cleves: seo_rin1212, jennifer_luanari, badeya_lexie, mins________d, janet_hs, janet_hs

Howard: day_star_._, ryeovely_k, ryeovely_k, soul.g_heo, 890110kr, cjes.music

Parr: sunrise_0125, yoozuyoozu, yoozuyoozu, jjang_beautiful, acefactory.official, memories_of_jh

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jeremy-queere · 8 months

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The major downside of the OCR squip song line is I have to live with the knowledge that Rich doesn’t wash his hands after using the bathroom </3

Still, wish they kept it. The best version is probably the off-broadway one, cuz not only does it keep the line but it also gives us an extra verse

(also hi this ask is an excuse to hear your opinions)

HAHAHA. Depressingly I would assume that's canon for all versions of Rich.

You gotsa tell me what extra vers you're talking about?? unless it's the bit I will rant about below bc

YES MY OPINIONSSS

so!!!!!!!!! christ this got long. you are not contractually obligated to read it

The SQUIP song is literally an infomercial. It is. And it's great and I love it. Way back in the day I did an in-depth analysis of a Heathers song line-by-line about how each element was used to make JD more manipulative. The SQUIP song deserves that too so. I'll see if I need to do that in this post?? We know what an infomercial is!

Random Google result for the structure of an infomercial brought up a guide on writing one. It defines the format as 4 sections:

The introduction introduces the product or service and the problem it solves. It should be concise and serve as an attention-grabber for the listener/viewer. It’s a teaser and should be written in an engaging and lively manner.

The product demonstration explains how the product or service works and its benefits. The product is presented in detail so the audience is informed of features and benefits.

The call to action encourages viewers to take action and purchase the product or service. Ideally it includes a special offer or some enticing incentive to get your audience to act.

The closing summarizes the key points and offers a final call to action. It repeats the benefits of the service, the special offer incentive, and where and how to buy the product or service.

For an example of this in song form, check out TWRP's The Perfect Product:

youtube

Lemme also google persuasive writing techniques... and one of them is just a list of fallacies, so let's head there for more SQUIPspo. And a list of infomercial techniques. I'll only include them if they're relevant to the SQUIP song, but Rich uses a ton of 'em so. Here's a sampling!

Appeal to ignorance - Your claim is true because there's no evidence against it. Compare with argument from silence - "assuming that a claim is true based on the absence of textual or spoken evidence from an authoritative source, or vice versa" False dilemma - An either-or problem without considering whether a third option is possible. Definist fallacy - Defining a term in a specific, emotionally biased way, making the argument hard to refute if the listener accepts the "loaded terms"' definitions. Divine fallacy - "because something is so incredible or amazing, it must be the result of superior, divine, alien or paranormal agency" Reification - "treating an abstract belief or hypothetical construct as if it were a concrete, real event or physical entity" Focus on the problem and its solution in the ad, not just the product/service itself. Talk about solutions and benefits, not features. Storytelling to connect to customer's emotion - including the power of testimonials Create a sense of urgency. "Because they know if they can’t get someone to act right away, they’ll come up with reasons and excuses not to act later" Add value by showing multiple uses. Use memorable phrases and taglines. Before/after comparisons Repetition Various appeals to emotion including fear, ridicule, and "Wishful thinking – arguing for a course of action by the listener according to what might be pleasing to imagine rather than according to evidence or reason" Argumentum ad baculum - An argument made through threat of force Genetic fallacy – a conclusion is suggested based solely on something or someone's origin rather than its current meaning or context

Infomercial programming is full of powerful words that sweep viewers into a world of possibilities. They structure their content to bring people to an emotional high thinking about how different their lives could be… if they only picked up the phone. Then, to hammer home the point, infomercials contrast that ideal situation with the viewer’s current reality. They point out how the viewers’ lives won’t improve and will only get worse if they don’t take action.

Also golly. I can't finish reading through this list of cognitive biases because it's too damn long but here's the wiki link anyhow. (Also in the above list, I quoted a lot of the sources without specifying which one - but then I remembered this is me just rambling about a Be More Chill song I like, not an academic report, so myeh :P)

OK FUCK AFTER ALL THAT. I guess it won't take much MORE time to do a line by line, huh?? I'm not going to point out which fallacy Rich uses and when because tbh I'm lazy. I worry that this is over-explaining because Rich's not like. Subtle. But whatever

Freshman year I didn't have a girlfriend or a clue I was a loser just like you

Setting Jeremy as the "before" in the infomercial with Rich as the "after." Also connecting the concept that being single = being a loser. Even though the focus of this song isn't about "getting the girl," that seed's already planted - not as an end goal, but that having a girlfriend is an important prerequisite to become like Rich.

Good times would only Soar by

This is important to connect to the "picture this" segment, so put a pin in this. Everything Rich says about himself is a descriptor of how he sees Jeremy and, therefore, how Jeremy should see himself. This is setting up the problem in order to create a solution down the line - or rather a huge host of problems: You're single, clueless, a loser, you miss out on the good experiences you're supposed to get in high school...

I was gross As every female would attest

Here, note that the boys' opinion of Rich aren't taken into account yet. Being "gross" isn't just a personality flaw or about something physical - it's a measure of one's worth in a way that can be objectively measured by how popular they are with girls.

This will also segue well into Be More Chill Pt 1 & 2 with the focus on Jeremy's slobbery.

My sexting was a futile quest My little penis was depressed He was so lonely Poor guy

More of the same in that sexual conquest is linked to self worth, but the language here is important too. Firstly, Rich is sliding in words like "depressed" and "lonely" without openly diving into those emotions. In fact, he's suggesting that feeling depressed and lonely (which again, Jeremy is meant to see in himself) is at its heart a sexual problem.

I'd also expect that, with the bathroom setting and the "confidence" line in the play, Rich talking about his penis is an alpha male dominance thing.

But! If nothing else, Rich was right that it speaks to confidence. The first thing we learn about Jeremy is his sexual frustration, which is an introduction for us about his feeling of powerlessness in his own life. The point isn't that Jeremy masturbates, but that he tries it unsuccessfully, making him uncomfortable, making him extremely self-conscious around peers, all of which he sees as his natural state.

Like, not to get too Freudian I guess. But Jeremy puts a lot of emphasis on his own dick (and balls... thanks, More Than Survive...) as a symbol of shame and lack of control. Rich picks up on this innately (stalls are for girls, Jeremy!). I headcanon Jeremy as needing testosterone shots due to being intersex and that he has a lot of body image issues related to this

I was Hopeless, hopeless I was Helpless, helpless

Repetition! Also like, alliteration/slant rhyme, but let's not get into that.

Every time I'd walk the hallway I would trip

Maybe more than the previous lines, this characterizes old-Rich (and now-Jeremy) as socially awkward. As far as we know, Rich doesn't have any mobility issues, so the image we get is of someone who's so anxious that they don't look where they're going - then accidentally becomes very negatively visible by creating an obstacle in the hallway.

I was Stagnant and idle

Connecting to Jeremy's I-want song - what Jeremy fears most is stagnation, of survival without thriving. We now know that the SQUIP would have known this, but for Jeremy, this probably just resonated unexpectedly.

I was So suicidal

Finally we get the briefest glimpse of Rich as a kid with genuine mental health problems. Jeremy doesn't express suicidality (until the SQUIP encourages him to). Because it doesn't apply directly to Jeremy, maybe that's why Rich hurries right past it to the next lines.

But arguably, if we're taking all of the SQUIP Song as disingenuous, this could be more of a threat. Like, this is the ultimate point that Jeremy is striving toward if he doesn't make a change and fast.

And then Then, then Then, then Then, then Then, then Then, then Then, then I got a Squip

I love this bit. The repetition really does serve to draw you in, put you at the edge of your seat. Almost reminds me of Jenna in how carefully crafted their stories are (in comparison to Chloe, whose retellings are always written much less engagingly lol because she has such a shallow grasp of the situations).

The "then"s acting as a drumroll are important imo to keep this from feeling like a blast of information that Jeremy's forced to listen to. And then? And then? And then?!

And indeed, Jeremy does finally express interest instead of immediately running for the hills.

Note that this section of the song officially ends the introduction and moves onto the demonstration. We have the problem established - now here's the miracle solution.

[JEREMY, spoken] You got quick?

Side note - I do love a lot of things about the Broadway musical and cast. Will Roland's high notes are gorgeous.

But in most respects I prefer the original recording because the camp seems a lot more... legitimately weird, rather than played up for fans. The dynamic between Jeremy and the SQUIP is just so vastly different in the Broadway version. Broadway SQUIP is a fun bombastic villain, but he never gets the chance to schmooze Jeremy the way that OCR SQUIP did.

Other lines suffer from the same melodrama, including this one. Broadway Jeremy says it fearfully, knees practically knocking together. But OCR Jeremy says, "You got quick?" like a confused kid who WAS cornered in the bathroom but is now just trying to figure out what the hell Rich is talking about, which is closer to how the audience feels too. The "then"s really built up anticipation for all of us (and I'm sure there's another musical explanation about waiting for the phrase to resolve or something).

[RICH, spoken] Not quick Squip

[JEREMY, spoken] I've just never heard of it before

[RICH, spoken] Yeah, that's the point! This is some top-secret, can't-even-look-it-up-on-the-internet shit

The SQUIP having a weird name isn't a flaw. It's a feature! Duh!

It's presented as secret, illicit, dark-web technology. That gives it an exciting air of mystique but also explains away any doubts Jeremy would have.

It's also, I guess, a way for the musical to skip past several chapters of Jeremy googling the SQUIP and selling stolen beanie babies

It's from Japan

Now this line! This bit, I feel like I still don't totally understand. Obviously it's playing on the early 2000's hype of Japanese products being high-tech, cutting-edge, and a little bit weird. Everyone makes it pretty clear that the SQUIP being Japanese is a major selling point. Unfortunately, I suspect it's there to sound, at some level, exotic and confusing and untouchably cool. Sort of like the tech version of "ancient Chinese medicine" (which is smacked on half the labels in the vitamin aisle no matter their origin to give them a false air of authenticity)

It's a gray, oblong pill

Very important to mention lol. Imagine buying a SQUIP without knowing what it looks like and then getting the tictac.

Look on a bottle of prescription medication and you'll probably find a similar description- "yellow round pill" etc. The "oblong" language links the SQUIP to not only being tech but being psychiatric medicine, which Jeremy immediately picks up on.

That medical aspect also lends the SQUIP some authority and legitimacy, which it will happily abuse when it tries to treat Jeremy's various mental health issues later.

Quantum nano-technology CPU

Technobabble, again making the SQUIP sound advanced and, if you don't understand it, YOU'RE the dumb one, Jeremy.

The quantum computer in the pill will travel through your blood until It implants in your brain and it tells you what to do

Honestly? Very up front. Thanks, Rich. Setting expectations! He's building a lot of hype about something hard to quickly describe.

We know from Jeremy reprising the song later that the finger tutting Rich does is a vital part of the message of the song. It's the demonstration aspect.

[JEREMY, spoken] So… It's like… Drugs?

[RICH, spoken] It's better than drugs, Jeremy

I always appreciate the condescending tone here, like Jeremy's a child who just asked a very silly question.

If we're getting in the weeds - which clearly for some reason I am - we can read this as an acknowledgement that, for a kid in Jeremy's situation, drugs are in fact good. Jeremy saying "drugs" cautiously informs us as an audience that he isn't especially familiar with drug abuse, which is probably important context for how we understand his and Michael's weed use later. They're not using drugs like "cool kids" - they're using drugs like "losers."

Basically, Rich is acknowledging that drugs are one way to cope with all the problems that Jeremy has... but they're not the solution. It also distances himself from the dodgy role of drug pusher, which would be very easy to see him as in this interaction. Rich sounds like someone who has tried drugs (which for a teen, implies money, connectedness, a way around authority, and an exciting danger) but doesn't even want them because a SQUIP is like drugs but better.

[RICH & (ENSEMBLE)] It's from Japan! (Ah, ah, ah, ah, ah) It's a gray, oblong pill, (Ah, ah, ah, ah, ah. Ah, ah, ah, ah, ah) Quantum nano-technology CPU. (Ah, ah, ah, ah, ah. Ah, ah, ah, ah, ah) The quantum computer in the pill will travel through your blood until (Ah, ah, ah, ah, ah. Ah, ah, ah, ah, ah) It implants in your brain and it tells you what to do. (Ah, ah, ah, ah, ah)

Repetition legitimizes. Repetition legitimizes. Repetition legitimizes.

The chorus in the background sounds almost like a religious choir, raising the stakes, sounding inhuman and huge and overwhelming.

It tells you what to do

Now this may just be headcanon, but the way I hear this line, it's always as if Rich is trying to communicate to Jeremy that Rich is not the one singing the SQUIP song.

Jeremy, it tells you what to do (it gives you directions)

It TELLS YOU WHAT TO DO (IF I AM DOING SOMETHING. IT IS BECAUSE THE SQUIP IS TELLING ME TO. THE IMPLICATIONS JEREMY.)

Unfortunately, if that's Rich's goal, it doesn't work because Jeremy is used to having no power. He wants to be guided and have his own impulses set on the back burner. Rich thinks this is a red flag but Jeremy sees it like a racing flag being dropped.

It's preprogrammed (Ohhhhh)

As a description of features, this is pretty lame, right? You don't sell an iPhone by saying, "It can make calls. It has apps. Oh and also, it has its own OS :)"

This is just throwing words out there for the emotion of them, not the meaning. At best, we can argue that being "preprogrammed" means that Jeremy doesn't have to take responsibility for making any choices when it comes to the SQUIP's installation. Hooray.

It's amazing (Ohhhhh)

This is SO infomercially and I love it.

Speaks to you directly (Ohhhhh Ah ah)

Our first hint that the SQUIP isn't just a "thing" but a "being." For Jeremy, this is also a selling point, as per his I-want song.

You behave as (Ohhhhh) Its appraising (Ohhhhh) Helps you act correctly (Ohhhhh)

This section is so very tailored to its audience. Jeremy actively wants instruction. A personal trainer in his brain would be life-changing.

It's also a little insight into the ironically binary mindset of a SQUIP. They don't choose actions based on moral character, right and wrong. They analyze situations and categorize actions as correct or incorrect. Pass or fail. For Jeremy, who sees himself as constantly somehow failing at being a person (relatable), this is a breath of fresh air, of honesty.

[RICH &ENSEMBLE] Helps you to be cool

The book SQUIP didn't like the word "cool" because Jeremy conceptualized it as some weird unattainable state of mind: "Cool," capital C. The musical SQUIP doesn't have to worry about that (especially since they're in an audiovisual medium now). Instead, this underscores exactly what the SQUIP is supposed to do if Jeremy hasn't gotten the picture from the snapshots Rich has provided yet.

It helps you rule

Later called back as the kids "ruling" the world/school/human civilization/it's unclear, but for now, it's just about having a positive impact on the world and enjoying your time alive.

Previously, we described the SQUIP's physical features, its mechanism of action, and how you interact with it. Now we're taking it as something beyond a product that you can buy. You're not getting a SQUIP. You're getting a change in who you are. You can "be cool," which is about being perceived positively by your peers. But that's a passive action. The SQUIP can also help you to do... something vague and positive. It's easy to insert your own interpretation in this phrase.

ANYWAY we're FINALLY at the IMPORTANT PART OF THE SONG that they CUT to upset ME SPECIFICALLY lol

[RICH] Picture this:

We are comparing the before and after! This is the vital part of the presentation! We have the "before" of Rich being a mentally ill loner loser. Then he got a SQUIP, which can help you self-actualize. So it's stupidly important to demonstrate the consequences of installing the SQUIP in order to illustrate the goal Jeremy wants to obtain!

This isn't a vague promise of being cool. These are tangible, concrete improvements that Rich is living proof of. This is his testimonial of a positive SQUIP user experience. This is what Jeremy can strive toward and this is what he can obtain by buying a SQUIP.

This is the money shot, basically!

Nobody cares if you are late 'Cause even teachers think you're great

Nobody cares sounds like a loser thing... but it's flipped on its head. Nobody's paying you negative attention because people all like you. You aren't just cool with your peer group, but you have specific powers you can wield within the school for your own ends. You're no longer going to be bound to the schedule of high school, which is one of the biggest sources of disempowerment for Jeremy already - c'c'c'c'mon - he's constantly late, constantly uncomfortable, constantly belittled. But with a SQUIP, he can take control of his own time.

Realistically, this sounds a little weird, right? If a teacher is that invested in the high school hierarchy (hi Mr. Reyes), they're probably not doing their job that well.

But this isn't a realistic list of features. It's a beer ad with laughing faces, parties on the beach, bikinis. It's a smear of joy and bombast.

Your weekend's just a full-on slate of blowout benders

Jeremy's not only going to have friends, to be cool, but his everyday life is going to transform dramatically.

In Loser Geek Whatever, Jeremy explains that half of what he was proud of was just doing something he hadn't thought he was capable of before. This entire section is similarly aspirational. Jeremy hasn't gone to blowout benders before, but he envies the people who do.

Of teenage rockstar splendor

This is the height of the coolness promise! You're going to be incredible, Jeremy! You're not going to be alone ever again! You're going to be treated like a rock star, and what's more, you're going to know you deserve to be treated that way!!!

Right now you're Helpless, helpless You are Almost hopeless

I still don't get how Broadway skipped everything above and went straight down to Jeremy getting insulted again. The negging doesn't work without Jeremy having a clear future to look forward to.

Anyway, if Jeremy didn't realize before that the old Rich was supposed to represent himself, he does now with this further repetition. The word "almost," though - that's a hope spot. A tiny chance of redemption. The SQUIP isn't just a solution. It's Jeremy's only solution.

On the school's social map you're just a blip

This is given more meaning in its contrast to the idealized future Rich promised above. Without that context, it sounds like Rich is just insulting Jeremy to rub salt in the wound. But in context, it's reminding Jeremy that he's not at rock star status and can't hope to get there on his own.

But if you Take my advice

We're officially beginning the call to action, the if->then. Rich isn't selling you something, Jeremy. He's giving you advice because he sees himself in you.

and if you pay the listed price

I believe it's the OCR that has the threatening tone in Rich's voice for this one? I prefer that. It's a subtle threat of punishment (argumentum ad baculum!).

The "listed price" phrasing again makes this sound like a legitimate product rather than a back-alley deal, even with Rich pounding his fist in his hand.

If you wanted to get fake deep, you could again make the argument that Rich is warning Jeremy off by hinting at the SQUIP's price... but I truly do think this is more of a "bitch better have my money."

It's a nice contrast to the friendly advice, since Rich is Jeremy's bully, after all. This isn't too good to be true because Rich is demanding something in return.

I would call this part of the time pressure just based on Rich's demands outside of the song.

Well, then you go from sad to interesting To hip

We might see a person described as "sad" and think that's an emotion they're feeling. But no - this is who Jeremy is right now. He's a sad excuse for a person.

And it's not an immediate transformation. There are stages Jeremy will go through to get himself noticed and eventually admired.

I am doing the song a kindness by not paying extra attention to Rich using the word "hip"...

Your whole life will flip!

Again calling back to the rock star fantasy. This will change Jeremy's life. And Jeremy? Can it really get any worse?

[RICH & ENSEMBLE] When you buy a Squip!

This is the only time in the song where Jeremy is explicitly told what to do - and it's no longer "if" you buy a SQUIP. It's "when." You're going to do it eventually because you'd be crazy not to. Why not get started on fixing your life right now?

Rich is talking like he's already made the sale in between the lines "If you take my advice" and "when you buy." Confidence! This is also the conclusion of the sales pitch, when we're reminded that this is a tangible product that can be bought.

[RICH & (ENSEMBLE)] Hey, yeah, a Squip! (Ahhh, ahhhh) Oh, a Squip (Ahhh, ahhhh) Hey, yeah! (Ahhh, ahhhh)

Not much more arguing done here, but the repetition is pretty valuable for the weird "SQUIP" name. Rich is just building hype and emotion.

BMC ensemble is often what Jeremy, as our point of view character, perceives "everyone" to be feeling or doing. The ensemble isn't pushing a SQUIP on Jeremy, but they're in awe of what Rich is presenting to Jeremy.

No longer a drip when you got in your grip

Given the context of the rest of the song, I think it's more than fair to read a double entendre here as a callback to how the conversation started. Or maybe that's just my limp mack daddy game talking.

In any case, "grip" (along with, you know, rhyming with "SQUIP") is a strong word to choose implying power and, again, personal agency.

A Squip A Squip A Squip (Ah, ah, ah, ah, ah. Ah, ah, ah, ah, ah. Ah, ah, ah, ah, ah)

BIG FINISH!

#be more chill #squip song #rich goranski #mine

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nighthazerpg · 27 days

Text

Patch May 4th

Well that got away from me a little bit, here's a bargain bin full of small fixes and clarifications. Any substantive change that's not just clearing up wording has bold on it:

Martial Arts involving a melee attack now specify that they inherit the damage type of the weapon you're using - this made sense intuitively anyway, but it was worth being clear

Some minor clarifications on Pin, Shield and Boost Kick so their intent is clear.

Quickload may now be used in conjunction with other Trickshots because otherwise it just kind of sucks

Added the ability for the Drift Technique Stunt to be used with two-wheeled vehicles so you can Akira slide - and do so under that tanker truck that's sideways, but you can only drift for one turn!

The Brake Check and PIT Manoeuvre Stunts can now be used against vehicles up to one weight class above yours because without that they're just Ramming But Worse

Specified that the Gotcha! Stunt refers to you catching people with your vehicle, not reaching out the driver side window to catch people that sounds like it would end badly

The Blend In trait now has an * on the "you can't take this as a Pony" rule because there are exceptions like Palominians but there isn't the space to explain that in the Trait box

Added the Staggered condition to the list of Crowd Control effects on tab 10. It's just reference in case you never read the Martial Arts section

Specified that Aim only benefits the immediately proceeding Action

Specified that Thermocompensator Vest targets Resistance

Changed the notation on special ammo for the Amount of Default ammo to be "-" rather than "Infinite" because that raises more questions than it answers

Specified that the Combat Power Wing does not lose its Cover bonus against Opponents at higher altitudes

Specified that Heelz don't do anything if you're flying

Specified that normal methods of Fall mitigation do not apply to the damage taken in car crashes

Carrying capacity of ASL Encore buffed from L to 0.5. We'll be monitoring this change closely and watching out for any shenanigans that result. We're really trusting the community not to go crazy on this one.

Cargo capacity of F512 Hovercraft nerfed from L to 0. This terror has finally been reined in. I know the F512 mains will have my head for this one but the toxic gameplay that came out of this just had to stop.

Specified what happens with drones regarding Mind & Spirit damage - drones can be disoriented by dazzling attacks, but don't take damage, and they also don't have feelings you can hurt. But also, they don't pass this damage to the pilot in manual mode - I would imagine that someone piloting a drone in combat is expecting gunshots to peak the audio on their device, and has the volume adjusted accordingly. Not the same as getting literally flashbanged yourself.

Broadened the wording on what drone pilots are allowed to take advantage of with an aim action to include Trickshots

Specified that the Martial Staff is compatible with the Target Sprint Routine and also that you spend the stamina for all three spells cast

Specified that After-Image only affects sight and sound, which opens the door for somebody to use an exotic sense to tell it apart

Expanded wording on Simulacrum to specify that it can affect a range of senses (1/rank in spellcraft) but it is phantom and can't push buttons for you

Specified that when using Projection you need to have a sense to be able to deceive or perceive it - you can't use Projection to temporarily gain senses you don't have.

Spelled out on Spirit Blade some of the finnicky details of how it interacts with Martial Arts and Action Economy

Rising Strike reworked to clear up the ambiguity around Fall Damage and streamline the spell a bit more. It now launches equal to Margin of Success instead of a fixed 4 (which means a lot of Rising Strikes are going to be kind of underwhelming but some of them are going to be really impressive), and the ceiling height does NOT affect damage - because if you think about it, getting rocketed into a low ceiling comes with the consolation prize of only falling one floor instead of three. However, there's now a clause that explicitly damages the ceiling if you do that, opening the door (or, the ceiling) for some real matrix kung fu antics where you punch someone into the floor above.

Specified that Steady Heart and Knit Wounds cannot be cast multiple times per short rest

Dragonbreath has had its range buffed from 4 to Cone 4

Shared Burden now times out at 15 minutes so you don't have a Breezie shoulder buddy who makes you ungrapplable forever

Stated explicitly that queued hacks tick down in parallel, not in sequence - parallel was always the intention because Hacking gets comically weak if you need to wait for each one to go off before you start the next one, but apparently this wasn't spelled out

#nighthaze #cyberpunk #patchnotes #ttrpg #my little pony

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callsigndragon · 1 year

Text

Tasting the Ashes | Ch. 36: The night we lost it all ✍️📲

Word count: 2.5k

warnings: alcohol, mention of babies (duh), gINA (deserves a warning), cute stuff and the angst starts here pals.

A/N: WE'RE BAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAACK. okay okay i have this story P L A N N E D to the minimum, i'm just struggling to find time to actually sit down and finishing it- but we're getting there heheh

Also if anyone wants to be added to the tag list to not miss any chapter (we're on the final part, babes) let me know in the comments!

masterlist

It doesn’t take long for the guys to get to the pub, all eager and excited to spend a night celebrating the arrival of the two younger Bradshaws. The place invites people to feast with its dim light and cozy atmosphere; it’s the place they go when the Hard Deck is closed.

Bradley approaches the bartender, ordering a round of beer for all his family. Beers keep coming, all gathering around a joyful Bradley and a teary-eyed Goose. One is delighted by this new stage of his life, not only as Carole and JJ’s father, but also as Hen’s future partner. The other one can't believe that he’s finally a grandfather. He really thought this day would never come.

Once all of them have beers in their hands, they stand in a circle around Bradley, raising them and toasting for the new dad and the new babies of the family.

“We’re gonna be doing this again in a month once Maeve is born?” Bob jokes, patting Jake’s back.

The soon-to-be dad for the second time only smiles, sighing happily. “Man, I can't wait to hold my little princess.”

Bradley laughs, knowing that feeling. Even though Jake is a father already and loves Liam with his whole soul, that feeling of wanting to have your newborn is so bad that you have to keep waiting for a bit longer... That’s a feeling they're always going to have. Even though they are dads already.

Not that Bradley is thinking about having more babies.

"I'm fearing for whoever gets close to Maeve when she's older," Bradley jokes while placing an arm over Jake's shoulders. "That poor girl won't be able to date until she's in her thirties."

"It hasn't even been born yet, don't talk about dating!" Jake whines at the image of his own future.

"Well, let's forget about that and have fun!" Mickey says. And before the group dissolves into smaller ones, Bradley clears his throat, catching everyone's attention.

"I have… some news to share with you."

Reuben leaves his beer on a nearby table, reading himself for the news that, most likely, will flip the family's world upside-down. After all, there's been a tendency for that since Red showed up in their lives. "What is it, Rooster?"

Bradley’s grin couldn't be bigger when he announces the recent news. "Hen has finally given me a chance! We're going out on a date once her c-section is healed."

Goose fist bumps proudly and laughs in his very own fashion. “I knew she was the one for you, son.”

“Let’s not get ahead of ourselves. It’s just a date.”

Jake smirks, licking his lips before teasing Bradley. “The last date brought us here, to celebrate the birth of your two kids.”

“It wasn’t even a date.”

“Then only God knows what can result from that date.” Ice quips, earning a smack in the head from Slider. “Well, old glories. Let’s go play some pool.”

“You still know how to do that, Admiral?” Mav raises a defiant eyebrow while chuckling.

“Prepare yourself, captain. I’m going to beat your ass.”

Bradley and Jake watch as the old men leave for the pool table. Those four hadn’t been able to have a proper conversation in years and now? Now they have so much catching up to do. And all of them are really happy that the problem is finally solved.

Mickey, Bob, and Rooster leave to play some darts. And Jake, Reuben, and Javy, as designated drivers, stay behind and watch them have a fun time.

Gina’s plan starts right now. She had been following Rooster all day, and hoped to approach him once he was left alone. But this stupid family is like a package deal, you want one? You have to get them all.

And that’s not making her job easy.

Lucky for her, once they reach the pub and after their initial toast, they all split into smaller groups. Two of them accompany Rooster to play darts. Mickey and Bob, if she can remember correctly. Gina had been following them long enough to know their names.

The wizzos play darts while Bradley sits on a stool, looking at his phone.

It’s the moment she’s been waiting for.

Smoothing her black dress, she walks to the table, drink in hand, with a seductive smile plastered on her face. “Here alone?”

Rooster doesn’t even raise his eyes from the phone, watching videos of his babies. “No, I’m with my family.”

Gina notices the empty beer, and sees an opportunity to make conversation. “Can I get you anothe–?”

Rooster leaves his phone for a second, frowning and annoyed because who dares to disturb him? “Look, you seem like a nice girl, so I’m going to be direct. I have someone waiting for me at home, and I am not interested.”

And with that, Rooster gets up and walks to the bar to get himself another beer.

Gina starts to panic as she sees her plan crumbling before her eyes. But then, she realizes that not everything is lost yet. If she can't have Hen's man... she can have her friend.

Mickey turns the dart between his fingers, feeling the rugged surface of the barrel on his fingertips. He has come to a realization: Jinx won’t be able to give him what he wants, so he needs to stop trying, and stop forcing her to take a step in a direction she doesn’t want to.

It’s time to move on.

“Mickey, I can hear the wheels in your head turning from here,” mentions Bob while lowering his arm. He was ready to throw the dart, but his friend’s silence was bothering him a bit. “What’s going on?”

“I’m gonna move on, Bob.”

“What do you mean?”

Mickey leaves the dart in Bob’s hand, sighing. “It’s time to get over Jinx.”

Bob sits down next to him, his dart game long forgotten. “Are you sure? Didn’t Red say that she cared about you in the way you wanted?”

Drumming his fingers on the table, Mickey looks at his friend. “She’s been having anxiety attacks again... She told me that it wasn’t because of me, but I definitely triggered them. I can’t allow that.”

“Mickey, you two should sit down and talk about all this. In person, not over text.”

“I don’t know, Bob... I think it’s time to stop.”

And as if the universe was agreeing with him, he sees a gorgeous blonde girl standing behind them, alone with her whiskey. She raises her eyes, making eye contact with Mickey, before offering him an inviting smile. She wants him to approach her.

Bob looks at the exchange happening before him, frowning at how his friend seems to have made up his mind already. Is he going to pursue the first girl he sees as a rebound? Judging by the way he gets up and walks to the blonde woman, that’s exactly what he’s going to do.

Bob shakes his head, and goes to sit with Rooster. Whatever Mickey is going to do, Bob knows that he doesn’t want to be involved with it.

Ten minutes.

That’s how long it takes Gina to slide her tongue into Mickey’s mouth. Bob and Rooster can’t believe what they’re seeing, and even though both of them are deceived by the wizzo’s actions, Mickey and Jesse are not official. He’s not cheating on her.

But it kind of feels like it.

Rooster can’t stand the image anymore and leaves to talk with Jake, Mav, and Goose. Once he’s near, Goose claps his hand slowly, ready to tease his son. “Have you stopped looking at pics of your kids?”

Bradley laughs, placing a hand on his chest. “Have you seen them? They’re so cute! I can’t stop looking at them.”

Jake shakes his head, taking a sip from his soda. “Remember when you told me how whipped I was the day after I saw Liam? Now you get it.”

Rooster remembers that conversation like it was yesterday. He can’t believe Red has been in their lives for a year already. It feels longer. “Yeah, now I get it. Man, if something happens to those kids…”

“Nothing will happen to them. They’re safe with us. But whoever tries to get close to them will unleash the fury of the female family members.” Maverick jokes, patting Jake’s shoulder. “And I’m actually talking about your wife.”

“She’s the most badass woman I’ve ever seen,” Jake’s soft smile makes Mav laugh. He’s happy for his son and for all the things he’s accomplished, and he's proud of how he was almost completely alone a year ago and now is getting ready to prepare for a wedding with the love of his life and his two kids.

“You two have come so far… I’m sure Goose thought that Bradley was a lost cause, too.”

“Hey!”

Goose tilts his head, admitting that Mav is right. “I mean… yeah. I thought you would end up alone.”

Bradley scoffs, sitting down and getting another beer. “Thanks for the trust, dad.”

“Any time, son!”

The four men laugh, relishing the moment. It’s not everyday that they have something as beautiful to celebrate as the arrival of two new babies. They all know, deep down, that this happiness won’t last long. There’s someone out there threatening their dear Hen. The four men are ready to do whatever it takes to protect her.

Maverick is her father. Nobody will touch her as long as he’s alive.

Jake is her brother. He has finally gotten the family he craved so much, and nobody is going to take it away from him.

Goose is the grandfather of Carole and JJ. His once small family is growing up, and he won’t let anyone risk that.

And Bradley… Hen is the missing piece in his puzzle. The woman who, knowing the brokenness of his soul, is willing to love him. He will do whatever it takes to make sure she and the babies are safe.

Nobody will touch Hen Mitchell.

“...would you hate me if I left?” Bradley questions shyly. The three men laugh and shake their heads.

“How much did you drink?” Jake asks in return before giving him the car keys.

“Only a beer and a half. I've been trying to get you all drunk so I could sneak away and go see my girl and the babies.” He confesses, opening his hand.

Jake leaves the keys in Rooster’s open palm and laughs. “Goose, you owe me ten.”

“Will you stop making bets on me?” Bradley fakes annoyance while pulling a bunch of bills and hands them to Jake. “Pay their drinks for me, will ya?”

“Aye aye, Lt.”

Bradley turns around to leave, watching as Mickey and that girl are still sucking faces. “Don’t want to know how that ends.”

Jake, who was still unaware of Mickey’s current activities, almost drops the bills in his hand. He can’t see the girl’s face, but Mickey seems to be enjoying his time with her. “Oh my fucking God.”

“What now?” Mav groans, leaving his beer on the bar.

“Jesse is coming here to confess to Mickey.”

“She what?” Goose exclaims, watching the two lovebirds. He has her pressed against one of the pillars at the back of the bar, hands placed on her hips, while she grabs him by the back of his neck, pulling him as close as possible. They can’t see her face due to the angle, but one thing is for sure.

She is nothing compared to Jesse.

“I’m gonna leave. I don’t want to see the drama.” Bradley mutters, raising his hands in defeat, and leaves the bar.

Jake gets his phone from his pocket and quickly dials Jesse’s number. But she doesn’t answer. Jake texts her, telling her to answer the phone, to text him, but she must be driving. There's no way he can reach her.

Maybe he can wait for her out the bar, stop her from coming in. "Pops, I'm gonna wait for Jinx outside. She doesn't deserve to see this."

"Yeah, you do that. I'll try to make Mickey leave through the back door." Mav offers, and when both men are about to walk their separate ways, they see Jinx standing a few feet away from them… her whole face contorted in pure horror once she realizes that she was too late.

She has lost Mickey.

"Jake, go." Maverick pushes him in her direction, and Jake gives them the money Bradley had given him before, knowing well that he won't be coming back.

"Jake…" Jesse whimpers when she sees his friend, as tears run down her face.

"Hey, it's okay. It's okay, honey. Let's get you home," mutters Jake while softly pushing her out of the pub.

"I-I can't go home. What if he takes that girl home to fuck her?"

Jake sighs, knowing that she's right. "We'll go to my home, okay?"

"Tell me I'm dreaming, please. Just tell me this is a nightmare." She says, bursting into tears. Jake hugs her and leads her to his car, no way he's letting her ride her bike all the way home in such a state.

Once she's sat down and the seat belt is secured, Jake closes the door and calls his wife.

"Jake? Did Jinx get there? Are they kissing?" Red blurts, waiting for his responses.

"She did get here, but Mickey was kissing another girl when she entered the bar."

There's a collective gasp. Jake knows he’s on speaker, and all the girls are listening to him. "He did what?!"

"Mom, I'm as surprised as you are." He sighs, walking to his side of the

"Bring her home, Jake. We'll take care of her.” Red offers, and Jake can hear all the girls whispering and talking along with the distinctive sound of people packing up their things to leave.

“Girls, you don’t have to stop your night for this…”

“She needs her friends now, Jake.” Hen states, coming closer to the phone. “Take care of her for us, will ya?”

“I will, don’t worry. By the way, Rooster is on his way to get you. He couldn’t stay away from you and the kids any longer.”

The girls reply with a big aww in unison, as if they had rehearsed it, and it makes Hen chuckle. “I know, he texted me.”

“Take care of him for me, will ya?”

“I will. Now come home. Red and Jazz are preparing a room for Jesse.”

Jake hangs up and gets in the car. He’s about to try and calm Jesse a bit when he sees Mickey’s figure walking out the bar. Jake swears under his breath before starting the engine and driving away from this place.

Tagging the usual people hehe

@purplevortexx

@shrimping-for-all

@pono-pura-vida

@xoxabs88xox

@jynxmirage

#top gun maverick #top gun x reader #top gun maverick fanfic #top gun fanfiction #top gun #bradley rooster bradshaw x reader #bradley bradshaw #bradley rooster bradshaw #rooster bradshaw fic #bradley bradshaw x female reader #bradley bradshaw x reader #rooster fanfic #rooster top gun #rooster x reader #top gun rooster

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thegrapeandthefig · 6 months

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Hi there!

I’ve been attempting to create a festival for one of my gods (Asteria) and I found one of your posts really helpful, but I’ve been struggling with naming it, do you have any tips? Or what was your process before deciding on Priapeia?

Hi!

First, I'm glad you've found my post helpful and congratulations on building your own festival!

Finding the "Priapeia" was honestly very straightforward since it follows the most basic naming convention of taking a name or an epithet and adding the -ia or -eia suffix to it. And the term "Priapeia" also is already used and known in literature as a series of Latin poems about Priapus. But I've done this for other smaller events of my own making too, and this is the overall method:

Observing how the suffix is applied in ancient festival names is my first tip, like how a festival to Dionysus -> Dionysia, for instance. However, we also know that this wasn't limited to the name of the gods eg. Thargelion (month name) -> Thargelia.

With this in mind, my overall technique for naming festival is to list a bunch of words (in English of whatever your preferred language is) that are relevant to your festival. Those words can be epithets you chose to use for the festival, or simple words that make sense thematically.

I'll use another smaller festival of mine as example. Each November, I buy a bottle of Beaujolais Nouveau for Dionysus for a libation day I named the Gleukia. This libation day is a modern wink to the Anthesteria, since I open the new bottles of wine from this year's harvest. I wanted a name that would carry this across.

With this in mind, I'd list some words (eg. "new", "wine", "harvest" etc...) and then I'd go to this website https://www.perseus.tufts.edu/hopper/search

Here, in the search section, collapse the "English-to-[Language] lookup and search for the words you listed.

Here's an example of results with the word "wine" as search term:

As you can see, the search engine goes way beyond your search term and gives you plenty of contextualized uses for the word you initially looked for. It also gives you the frequency with which a term is used in ancient texts, letting you know of how common the word might have been.

So back to "gleukia"; the root word for it is right there: "γλεῦκος" with its given definition of "new sweet wine" (the word nowadays still means "must" and "new wine")

So now I had "gleukos" as a base, to which I just had to add the "-ia" suffix to -> Gleukia.

My ancient Greek is rusty af so I wouldn't be able to tell you why festival names seem to use this suffix in its feminine form instead of "-ios" which would be the masculine. What it does do, however, is transform a word (adjectives more often then nouns, mind you) into a feminine abstract noun.

If you're not very familiar with the Greek alphabet and aren't sure how to spell the word correctly in Latin script, you can copy the Greek term into Wiktionary for this, for example here with "γλεῦκος".

But yeah, technicalities aside, that's how I name my stuff. Basically:

Choose words

Look up words in this website I linked above.

Find the one term that makes you go "yes. that's the one"

Apply some grammatical magic

For the Priapeia, I only just did steps 1 and 4. Whereas some events required a bit more digging. Hope this helps!

#hellenic reconstructionism #naming my shit

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intuitive-revelations · 6 months

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Hey! So watching through The Daleks in Colour now, and thought I'd note down my thoughts, as someone who very much likes advocating for and discussing the idea of colourisation, re-edits etc. Comments not in order, as I'll be popping back and forth between sections with my notes.

The colouring is pretty impressive. There's some tone choices I would have done differently, and I have spotted a couple places where its a bit off (eg. colour not aligning perfectly - see One speaking when they discover the environomental radiation for example, there's a bit of odd yellow colouring around his upper lip - maybe a side effect of the chromatic abberation?).

However overall I think stuff like the faces and hair were done extremely well, which is pretty impresive since that can often be the hardest thing to do. And while I do disagree with some of the environmental colours etc., they do capture the 60s adventure tv aesthetic fairly well. I would just probably have leaned a little more modern/cinematic personally. I do wonder how many of the colours used are taken from colour set photos, as that might explain some of the choices. On the other hand, they're clearly not strictly using those colours, as the TARDIS clearly differs in colour from the set as we've seen it behind the scenes and in AAiSaT.

The lighting was pretty well done too, as is some of the chromatic abberation, though like I said I think it does have some detrimental effects in some places.

Editing feels ok, and keeps the pace up quite well. It does lose some importance bits though. I would probably have gone for a longer runtime, maybe 90 mins, rather than the 75.

I think it could have done with an extra beat when Barbara gets lost within the city, as it makes the others reuniting and searching around feel a bit too quick. Also a little bit of an edit-induced plot hole with Susan remarking how "there WAS someone outsidfe last night" when we completely skipped over that scene. Cutting that scene out does make her seem a bit less 'hysterical' though, which isn't the worse edit-based change in characterisation. That being said, the way they didn't directly show the Doctor sabotaging the fluid link, but left just enough to imply it was pretty clever.

Oh! I realise one reason why they chose to use this story. There's a LOT of cuts they can get away with just by dubbing the Daleks and adding flashing lights. I haven't seen the original serial enough times to notice them all, but I did pick up on the slightly hasty one as they interrogate the Doctor. Interestingly it also sounds to me like they tried to edit/redub the line about "Dalek forefathers" to say "Kaled forefathers" as it sounds different to me from the original, but is quite ambiguous. The subtitles still say Dalek, so maybe I'm just hearing things.

Some of the cross-edits work quite well, but the flashbacks are way too much, especially with a shortened runtime. Feels like some of that time could definitely have been better used giving the pacing some room to breath. Not showing Susan writing the letter is kinda ok, but does make you question why the Daleks are continuing to keep them prisoner. You kind of have to rely on the Dalek giving the plan idea earlier, which kind of just results in breaking 'show don't tell'. Another edit I wouldn't have made: they cut out the cell camera being broken. This one feels kinda major imo, so it's a surprising choice. I definitely would have left it in. Using the Daleks monitoring recordings of the scenes with the Thals for quick cuts is kind of clever again, but does feel too much like a cut-down recap video. There really needs to be a bit more room to breath here. It also makes Ian encouraging the Thals to fight back feel a bit too sudden and his scheme kinda seems insane.

While I liked seeing the classic city reproduced in CGI for that opening shot, doing something so dynamic did feel a little gratuitous. CGI TARDIS shots as it tries to dematerialise were also an odd choice, as they were very blatant, looking more like animation than anything, and I imagine it could be done more convincingly. The zaps (and sound effect) as the Daleks fire is a very good addition though - exactly the sort of added effect that I reckon is justified, given it's quite simple but adds a lot.

As for the music, I think they did a pretty good job overall in keeping the correct tone while expanding on the score. I'm maybe not enough of an expert on the classic soundtracks to comment really. Maybe a tad overactive when the Daleks first appear - it could have quietened down a bit after they tell the Doctor, Ian and Susan to move. Oh my god, I just got to the bit where Dalek!Ian is leading them through the corridors. The music and editing is certainly... a choice. On one hand, it's very fun. On the other hand... wtf...? With Susan guiding them it kind of feels like all those 'memelord' Susan jokes come to life. The whiplash going into them having to leave Ian behind kinda breaks it though.

Speaking about the Ian and Thals scene again, the music is a bit too much. Again it kind of makes it sound like Ian's talk is serious, even though he's just trying to encourage the Thals to defend themselves. Hmm, yeah I think the music was pretty good in the first half, but it's definitely trying a bit too hard in the second. Actually, in general the second half does feel a bit weak compared to the first half, but I suppose that can also be said with regards to the original serial.

Sound effects were well done. Cloister bell sounding as the TARDIS tries to dematerialise is a fun addition. I do feel it's overused a bit nowadays, but it's placement here seems reasonable, if you assume continuing to try and dematerialise would have put the TARDIS in actual danger.

I might have sounded quite negative with some of my nitpicks, but overall I did really quite like this! It feels like a good proof of concept for further re-releases anyway, but there were some odd choices throughout. A less aggressive runtime edit would probably have done wonders for it. As I mentioned above, I do also feel the first half was a lot stronger than the second.

If I had the time (which I definitely don't right now, between work, my PhD/thesis, Class Ongoing, Galliversary contribution, and other secret exciting stuff), I'd love to go through and attempt a re-edit, colourising and sticking some of the shots/scenes I think ought to have been kept, and tweaking some of the colour choices. Maybe attempt a widescreen expansion too, since most of the colour work is already done.

#Doctor Who #Classic Who #The Daleks in Colour #The Daleks #First Doctor #Doctor Who 60th Anniversary #Doctor Who Regenerated #(kind of)

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