incorrectquotesofmylife
In a constant state of bi panic
I got ninety-nine problems but I'm gonna ignore them all and go bACK TO BED
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I'm Australian. I admit NOTHING.
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God: *at your door with a HUGE bouquet of flowers*
Bestie/Demon: *eating spicy Doritos with chopsticks* you could do sooo much better
Satan: IF YOU LAY ONE FINGER ON MY CHILD-
Random, 2am Writing Prompt
God: *hopelessly in love with you*
You: *an ordinary human*
Your Best Friend: *a literal demon*
Your 'Dad' Figure: Satan
The Plot Twist: *God is gay, he is just tryna throw suspicion off*
#You: *3am* How does he even yell from Hell? Like#Bestie: *barely awake* He got microphone#creative writing#writing prompt#writing#writing dialogue#writers and poets#writeblr#writers on tumblr
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Random, 2am Writing Prompt
God: *hopelessly in love with you*
You: *an ordinary human*
Your Best Friend: *a literal demon*
Your 'Dad' Figure: Satan
The Plot Twist: *God is gay, he is just tryna throw suspicion off*
#creative writing#writing prompt#writing#writers on tumblr#writeblr#writing dialogue#writers and poets
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*sleep over at my house*
Bestie: *in the middle of a mental crisis cuz Classmate B is her crush*
Bestie: How do I make him love me?
Me *not looking up from my spell book I'm reading* Just a sec hun, I've almost found the page
Overheard At High School
Classmate A: Would you fuck a donkey for $200?
Classmate B: I would fuck you for $20, but the extra $180 sounds pretty good
#source: incorrectquotesofmylife#High school humor#incorrect quotes#overheard#high school#humor#funny shit#witchcraft#witch memes#witchblr#witch
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Overheard At High School
Classmate A: Would you fuck a donkey for $200?
Classmate B: I would fuck you for $20, but the extra $180 sounds pretty good
#incorrect quotes#source: incorrectquotesofmylife#overheard#high school#High school humor#humor#funny shit
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Played 5 Second Rule on Easter
My mum was not pleased that the only thing I could to put in a bag was a body 🤣
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FUCK.
My bisexuality, summed up
Harry: I never tell people off the bat that I'm bi. I wait. I wait until they say some homophobic shit and then I laugh and I'm like "you know I'm bi right?" and watch the look of terror on their faces
Draco:
Draco: Please marry me
#incorrect harry potter quotes#bisexual#harry potter incorrect quotes#incorrect drarry quotes#harry james potter#harry potter#incorrect hp quotes#draco lucius malfoy#draco malfoy
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I've heard a lot on the internet about people going ridiculous lengths for their cats but. Can we talk about bird people?!?? I have seen people with pet birds who literally stop breathing so their bird can drink out of their mouth. The SAME birds that bite them 24/7, put their beaks WHO KNOWS WHERE and yet these people will wash out their mouth so the birds have fresh water.
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I'm gonna feed these fuckers to my cousin cuz SHE IS NOT SHUTTING UP AND I AM FUCKING DONE
the primal urge to devour forbidden potato fruit
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'Try to spot the gay' is a game now
It's hella funny when random people I have met assume I'm straight then four months later I ☆reveal☆ that I'm bi as fuck with a gorgeous girlfriend and I get to watch their faces as they look back over all our transactions and 'try to spot the gay'
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It's hella funny when random people I have met assume I'm straight then four months later I ☆reveal☆ that I'm bi as fuck with a gorgeous girlfriend and I get to watch their faces as they look back over all our transactions and 'try to spot the gay'
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Person A: Why was six afraid of seven?
Person B: Because seven was an abusive parent and beat nine consistently
Person A:
Person A: ........Do you need a therapist?
#source: incorrectquotesofmylife#incorrect quotes#creative writing#writing prompt#dialogue prompt#writers on tumblr#writeblr#writerscommunity#writing#character dialogue#writing dialogue
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I'm Australian. This is pretty much exactly how we flirt
Person A: “Hey, you understand ancient Greek right?”
Person B: “A little, but I haven’t really used it the past century or so, why?”
Person A: “Do you know what that word (Person C) keeps calling me, means? I tried looking it up but couldn’t find anything.”
Person B: “….I think it might be better if you ask them that.”
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Ouch. But true
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My trust in my homophobic has reached the extreme that I can leave my phone somewhere for two minutes without exiting my site and deleting my search history!
#i'm home alone#There is literally no one in the house beside that one ghost who I accidentally summoned that now haunts my sock drawer#i shit you not#I'm free#lgbtqia#lgbtq community#queer community#queer#bisexual#gay humor#closet#lgbt pride#lgbtq#lgbt+
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