Haiku

I don’t want to be alone anymore writing poems you won’t read

8:36 PM 1/5/21

i’m back to watching what i eat and observing my calories

looking in the mirror hurts i wish i didn’t look like this.

i haven’t been on here in a long time when i first started spilling my mind on here i was with a boy and he made me feel like living,

i’m still with him ofc he’s jst idek losing interest he seems to just be using me at this point also i need physical touch i want him to hold my face and stroke me with his thumb lightly. i love him so much but he lives so far..

ig i’m back here again.

idk why i keep coming back to tumblr, maybe it’s because i feel more heard or something i’m not too sure

i feel so empty again recently..oh well nothing i can do about it i wish i could feel more again

in my opinion everyone should read they both die at the end

...

time

someday, the day will come when i forget the sound of your voice and it will be lost in time. the feeling it used to resonate will cease, the memories that it used to stir will fade. i will miss the sense of soft syllables and energetic expressions that hit my ears. you make me wish every word of my life was spoken by you.

-//A.A

dear diary

i’m so sick and tired of these repeating days, i want to feel again, i want to cry again, i want to smile again

i wish that someone out there understood me and felt exactly what i feel. it hurts oh my god it just hurts so much. i want it to end, it gets worse everyday 

i need to stop saying “it gets better” i don’t have time for false hopes in my life. it doesn’t get better it never does it just gets worse and worse.

listening to sad music even though it makes me feel even worse.

what if i like the pain. what if i enjoy feeling worse

it’s all getting bad again. the thoughts and the feelings. actually no...there are no feelings i feel so numb i don’t feel sad or angry or really anything at all. Its not that i don’t want to be here i just don’t really see the point in being here 

i didn’t actually expect for anyone to find my tumblr or reblog anythinggg i say but it’s cool that others relate, i feel more heard.

he’s the only one that cares. i appreciate him soo much

i made a quesadilla.

I hope the leaving is joyful; and I hope never to return.

-frida kahlo

just want to delete myself from social media and disappear. leave with no explanation

is it possible to get rid of the thoughts