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syrupgirl · 1 year

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warnings:

descriptions of blood(like fr), mentions of death, i call neteyam’s injury ‘a hole in the chest’, my very limited knowledge of medical procedures(both human and na’vi), me changing the severity of his injury probably, that’s it methinks?

a/n: this one just fell out of me. a fix it fic if you will.

Lie si oe Neteyamur -Neteyam

“You cannot rush this, daughter.” Your mother says as she strokes your head.

It has been days since the battle. Many lives were lost, even more injured. And as selfish as it is, you mind would not drift away from one person.

Neteyam.

You had been in charge on taking care of the injured that were brought back to the village. Being a Tsahik in training, you mother deemed it essential to have experience in real conditions to feel the pressure you would be carrying until you passed on the status to the best Tsahik.

After countless gruelling hours of tending to the wounded, you heard your name being called from the shore. After passing of your patient off to your partner, you down ran to the beach, only to be greeted by a sight you never thought you would have to see.

“Neteyam?!”

Sand kicked out from under your hurried feet as you approached Tsireya who had a bleeding Neteyam attached to her side.

“H-he..He was shot! It went straight through h-him.” The poor girl was hysterical. The blood of her friend covered her hands and even some of her stomach.

Neteyam himself looked terrible. His complexion was blanched and his eyes could barely stay open. Across his chest, he looked to be wrapped in seaweed, probably to stop the bleeding. You guessed that once you undid the bindings you would also find sea moss plugged in the wound as well. Curtesy of your sister, you guessed.

As much as you wanted to curl up and cry until you couldn’t anymore, Neteyam didn’t have that time. Right now, you weren’t Neteyam’s…friend..You were the one in charge of saving his life, in charge of his healing, and, if all went well, his recovery.

“Here, give him to me, I will take him to our marui.” You shouldered his body and he groaned. “Yes, yes, I know and I’m sorry.”

Neteyam didn’t seem to be capable of conversation but keeping him conscious was your top priority until you could get your remedies.

It was a struggle up the shore but you made it, with Tsireya stumbling behind. You lay him down as gently as you could.

“Neteyam? Neteyam, can you hear me? It’s yn.”

You spoke to him as you checked his body for any other injuries. Anything that would make it more difficult to deal with the hole in his chest. Nothing turned up so you continued to speak to him.

“Neteyam? I’m going to unwrap your chest now, it will hurt but I need to to stay with me, okay?”

He was awake but you had no idea if he was actually hearing anything you were saying. With a deep breath, you slowly started to unwrap his chest.

You weren’t ready for what greeted you.

The tight wrappings had slowed down the bleeding but there was still so much. It covered your palms and wove itself between your fingers. You heart was beating out of your chest and you got closer and closer to his naked chest.

Neteyam was moaning and muttering above you but you didn’t want to take your eyes off his injury.

“Tsireya? Is he still awake?” You asked your sisters, fingers still working on the makeshift bandages.

“Uh..uhm.” She knelt down closer to his face. “Yes, I think h-he is.”

“We need to keep him with us, as much as it will hurt him, we cannot risk him slipping away.”

Tsireya nodded and started to try make conversation with him. “Your brother still needs you, he is lost but he needs you to bring him back.”

You felt yourself tear up at her words. It was not just his brother who still needed him.

After discarding the seaweed in a pile, you came face to face with the bloody mess. Fortunately, it didn’t seem to be bleeding as much as it was before and just like you thought, there was a large clump of sea moss packed around the wound. You picked it up as gently as possible and the boy above you jerked.

“It- it hurts!” He whined and you put a hand gently on his shoulder.

“I know and i’m sorry but it is what needs to be done.”

He didn’t respond after that but kept whining in pain and wriggling slightly.

“Tsireya-” your sister looked up and you handed her a tightly woven basket, “-fill this with water.”

She nodded and takes it from your hands hurriedly. You use the sea moss to clean up the sight as much as you can before putting is next to the seaweed.

In record time, Tsireya ran back to your side, handing you the basket now filled to the rim.

“Thank you, sister.” You said. You brings your hands up to her face and she closed her eyes. “Be calm, he will live, i’m sure of it.” She meets your gaze again and sniffs. You try to give her a reassuring smile before turning back to Neteyam.

With the basket in hand, you shuffle up next to his shoulder. As slowly as you can, you tip the container forward and watch the water wash into the hole in his chest. The blood melts off of him as the water takes its place.

Neteyam sounded like he was downright sobbing and you hear Tsireya whisper to him, “Be still, Neteyam. You are in good hands.”

You hoped she was right.

It had taken many hours of tears and screams but you had managed to bring Neteyam back to where he was stable. He now rests in his family’s marui like he has been for days, surrounded by the love of his family.

And as much as you want to see him, you know better than anyone how important family is in times like these. They need space.

“You did a great thing, without you, my love, the loses would have been so much greater.” Your mother is known for her stone cold resolve and tough exterior but you wouldn’t have it any other way. She loves you and your siblings in her own way. “I feel so proud knowing I chose you to take my place as Tsahik of this village once I return to our great mother.”

“Thank you, mother. It is a great honour.” She smiles down and you and holds you closer.

That night you cannot sleep, opting you go for a swim, a now common occurrence since the battle. You lie of your back, floating on the surface and looking up to the sky. You remember your father telling you that Jake Sully was from one of the distance stars. How fascinating.

Small waves lap underneath you. A small light shoots across the sky. Everything is still.

Well it is until someone dives in next to you.

You’re so surprised, you slowly a mouthful of water.

“I’m sorry, I didn’t mean to startle you.” It’s Lo’ak’s voice you hear while dying cough out all of the water from your mouth.

“It is okay,” You splutter, turning to face him. “Why do you come to me, Lo’ak?”

He looks down into the water and it is silent for a beat. “To thank you. I should have done it sooner and I apologise, but I just couldn’t..couldn’t-”

“Leave him?” You interrupt him and he nods. “I understand. After something so major, your family needs to heal. That includes you.” The sound of lapping water fills the silence between you.

“That’s not the only reason i’m here.” He continues. You look up to him again, slightly confused. “Neteyam, he has been asking for you.” Your eyes widen a little. “While our parents aren’t around, he asks us where you are and how he still has to thank you.”

It’s a bit sill, but you can feel small tears well up in your eyes; he’s been asking for you?

“Since his..injury, he has been moved into a separate marui to heal and he asked if I would bring you there.”

Now you feel like laughing; this whole time while you have been aching to see him, he has been feeling the same.

“I would like that, Lo’ak.” You sniffed and Lo’ak grins.

“I had a feeling you would.”

Before you reach Neteyam’s marui, Lo’ak decides to go back to his family’s marui. You try to insist that he joins you but he flat out denies and just grins while he walks away.

When you arrive to the doorway and look inside, you see Neteyam sitting up against the side of the dwelling.

“Neteyam?” His head immediately spins your way and there is a big smile on his face. It is contagious.

“yn, it’s so good to see you!” He whispers as you kneel next to him.

“How are you feeling? Should you be sitting u-”

“I knew that would be the first thing you ask me.” His smile gets even bigger and again, you match it.

“I’m sorry, force of habit.” You both chuckle. “Was there any reason you wanted to see me?”

“I want to thank you, for saving me.” You are about to tell him that you were just doing your job but he keeps going, “I was..I was so scared. I felt like a little kid again. But when Tsireya brought me here, to you…I knew that I would be okay.”

“Oh Neteyam…” Your eyes well up with tears and Neteyam out his hands on your cheeks.

“I’m sorry, i didn’t mean to make you cry.” His thumbs caught the tears that rolled down your cheeks.

You suddenly wrap your arms around his neck. “I have been so worried for you Neteyam…” Your words are muffled against his skin and he can feel the vibrations echoing up his neck. Neteyam hesitates, before wrapping you up into his embrace. Silence blanketed the two of you, interrupted only by the sound of your occasional sniffles and the waves breaking against the beach.

Neteyam is the one to finally shatter it.

“While I was out there, I fought as hard as I could…To defeat our enemies, yes, but also…I knew that, whatever happened, I had to get back here,” He brings a hand up to your face that is still planted in his shoulder and lifts it gently. “I was so scared…”

Your eyes flutter close and another tear slips down your cheek, down past your quivering lips.

“But when Tsireya brought me here, to you.” A smile weaved itself into his voice and you looked up to him. “I knew that I was going to be okay.”

Neteyam looks like he is crying now and you can’t bear it.

“Oh Neteyam..I’m so happy that you’re okay.” You lean forward and rest your forehead again his.

“The great mother is not ready to meet me yet.” He chuckles and you let out a watery laughter with him.

In this moment, all is well, all is calm. He is here. With you.

You wouldn’t have it any other way.

Your dear Neteyam.

#not beta read #avatar fanfiction #could be riddled with mistakes #avatar #avatar x reader #neteyam x reader #avatar imagine #avatar way of water #jake sully #lo’ak #neteyam #neteyam x metkayina!reader #tsahik!reader #tsireya sister!reader #neteyam imagine #neteyam x you #neteyam x y/n

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thebellearchives · 2 months

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𝐄𝐓𝐄𝐑𝐍𝐈𝐓𝐘

~ solomon ; obey me

✧˚ · . S Y N O P S I S : staring at Solomon you realise how lucky you are to be by his side and how much more time you’d like to spend with him

‧₊˚ c o n t e n t s : gn!reader, fluff, second part to blessed although you don’t need to read it to understand this one

‧₊˚ a / n : i was having a hopeless romantic moment and remembered that sol shot i wrote for @nnnneeev (‘: blessed was centered around solomon’s thoughts so i thought it would be nice to write mc’s thoughts this time! enjoy!

You look up from the book you’re holding. Across the table, Solomon squints a little as he studies the amount of liquid in the vial before pouring it in a small cauldron. The sight of him makes you instantly forget all of the words printed in the old book he lent you. You forget your surroundings, the question you were about to ask, the experiment you had been helping him with. Your eyes glide all over him, his long fingers reach for a flower and pick out three petals. His silver eyes flicker towards the book on his right side, double checking he’s using the right amount, and his pearly hair almost hides those beautiful irises from you.

Every little thing about him captures your attention, the way his long white lashes frame his eyes as he goes back to the cauldron, the ways he slightly licks his lower lip unconsciously. If it weren’t for those little movements you’d think he’s a figment of your imagination, but it’s the way his pupils dilate slightly when he uses a little bit of fire to burn the petals that makes you think that yes, he’s real. He’s alive, he breathes the same air as you and my god, it feels like a dream. He looks like a dream.

It’s not like you’d usually forget all that you’ve been through in the devildom, but when you have the chance to admire him you do. You don’t remember how you ended up helping him with this new experiment, how you ended up being his apprentice. One day you were living your life up in the human world and the next you were staring at the immortal sorcerer who had showed you more than you would’ve ever believed real. It’s a privilege, really, to have in front of you someone as knowledgeable and passionate as him. You could hardly believe he was who he was, or the position you had found yourself in.

You hadn’t lived as much as he had, that was for sure, but it was moments like this that made it all worth it. And maybe, just maybe, he thought the same way? Maybe he was finally content with the life his immortality had brought him to? It had been a long time since he said something negative about it, you had noticed.

He calls your name then, and you jolt a little, blinking repeatedly as he snaps you out of your thoughts.

“Are you okay?” he chuckles, his bright smile has you swooning in your head “are you having trouble with the book?”

“No” you shake your head and smile back “sorry, i just kinda zoned out”

“Yeah? What were you thinking about?” he raises his brows curiously, a little teasing smile curves the corners of his lips.

You remain silent for a second, trying to decide if you want to be honest or just play it off. Until you remember some words he told you weeks ago, and you smile a little too.

“Just that you’re the best thing to have ever happened to me.”

You know you caught him off guard when his hands stop mid-air. His eyes widen a bit, and you notice the way his cheeks slowly start turning red little by little. He clears his throat, flustered, resuming the potion process.

“I’m… honoured you think that way, angel”

A warm feeling sits on your chest at his tender tone, and the blush in his cheeks makes you feel a little proud. You know he’s not as good at receiving compliments as he thinks he is, and you finally understand why he finds it so amusing to fluster you too. You knew it then: you’d never regret eternity if you could spend it by his side.

#; fluffy belle #obey me #obey me swd #obey me nightbringer #obey me solomon #solomon x reader #solomon x mc #solomon x you #obey me solomon x reader #obey me x y/n #obey me x you #obey me x mc #obey me x reader #gn!reader #gn!mc

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calaisreno · 6 months

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Yes and No

“Do you love her?”

It had taken them less than thirty minutes to go from the Rizla game to just asking each other random questions. The only celebrities that Sherlock knew were nineteenth-century chemists and twentieth-century criminals, which had more or less spoiled the game, and Sherlock had declared it pointless.

Then he suggested Yes or No, which at least required some deductive reasoning, and John agreed. But Sherlock was very good at this game, having deduced nearly everything about John in the first days of their acquaintance. Without asking any question, he deduced that John would choose violin, a human liver, Mrs Hudson’s nephew, and Sherlock’s old mouse-coloured dressing gown.

John gives up. “Fine. What don’t you know about me?”

Do you love her is a real question, he gathers— from the look on Sherlock’s face, which is serious and a bit sad.

The answer, which should be yes, of course I love her, instead comes out, “I’m marrying her.”

“People marry for reasons other than—“ Sherlock stops, appearing to realise he is going in a direction that can only lead to bad feelings. “Sorry, not a fair question. Better: When did you know that you loved her?”

He remembers grief. The intense pain of the days after he saw Sherlock die on the sidewalk in front of Barts. There are few details he can recall after that moment. It was as if the pain had receded just enough to let him breathe, and a kind of grey fog had descended. Pain, then sorrow.

Somewhere during the sorrow part, Mary had appeared. She may have been there sooner, but he hadn’t noticed. At some point he became aware of her bringing him coffee, talking to him, urging him to come out for lunch. Always there, cheerfully bullying him back into life. Eventually he noticed that he wasn’t quite as sad, and that she was rather pretty.

But the pain was still there, a tender spot in his memory, and most days he still felt defeated. Mary helped, though, and he thought that if she stayed, everything would be easier. He didn’t need to explain; she understood. He could keep the memories at bay when she was around.

By then he was having sex with her. He didn’t remember exactly how that had begun. Maybe it was a pity fuck one night when he’d had too much to drink. He woke up in her bed hungover, waiting for the darkness to descend like a weight on his chest, and she was there, making him a cup of tea, urging him to have some toast, sweetly solicitous and not accepting any excuses.

Does he love her?

Sherlock is still looking at him, the question in his eyes.

“She was there when I needed someone,” he says. “I just knew.”

He’d known that morning that he needed to move on, to leave what had happened in the past and live his life. And there she was.

“Your turn,” Sherlock says.

John thinks of all the things he’s ever wanted to know about Sherlock, but has never asked because it has never seemed a good time. Sherlock has a way of warding off questions with just a look. An armour that does not allow anyone in, not even John. He’s wondered about a lot of things, but asking has never been an option. Sherlock never has to ask; he simply deduces. John is terrible at deductions, as Sherlock often reminds him.

“Have you ever been in love?”

Sherlock doesn’t hesitate. “Yes. Twice.”

“That was a yes-no question, so I get follow-up. So, the first. Who was he?”

Sherlock smiles. “You’re assuming it was a man.”

“Wasn’t it? I thought… you’re… erm…”

“Gay? Yes, I am.”

“You loved a man,” John says. Obviously.

“Well, a boy. I was twelve. I suppose it wasn’t love so much as infatuation and hormones. His name was Victor. I never told him until I met him again at uni.” He gives John one of those looks that makes him feel like he is being x-rayed. “Have you ever kissed a man?”

“I’m not gay,” he says at once. “I mean, why would I kiss a man if I knew I wasn’t gay?”

“Follow-up question, then. When did you know you were not gay?”

John’s mouth may have been open for a bit. It’s an odd question. Everybody knows they’re straight until something happens and they know they’re not. Isn’t that the way it works? “I just knew. When did you know you were gay?”

“When I was twelve. I was at a stupid birthday party my mother made me attend, and we were playing Forfeit. I was asked a question I didn’t like to answer and took the forfeit. Up until then the penalties were stupid things like singing a song or doing a dance, but this time it was kissing a girl. The girl was willing, and I was curious, so I agreed. That was when I realised girls weren’t my cup of tea, so to speak. I wanted to kiss Victor.”

John says nothing, though it’s his turn. He remembers a similar party, a boy who wanted to kiss him, and feeling terrified that his parents would find out if he did. Harry had just come out, and he was trying very hard to make up for all of her shortcomings.

Sherlock asks, “How do you know you’re not gay if you’ve never kissed a man?”

“I’ve kissed lots of women,” he replies. “I don’t need to kiss a man to know I’m not gay.”

Sherlock shrugs. “I assumed that I was like everyone else, that some day I would meet the right girl, get married, and have children. That was how it was supposed to work, and I thought there was something wrong with me because I didn’t like girls that way. All my fantasies were about boys, but I thought I would eventually be attracted to girls as I got older. That kiss told me I would never love a woman.”

“You think I should kiss a man just to see if I’m a bit gay?” He laughs.

“It’s your forfeit, for not having an answer.”

“I’m not going to kiss some random bloke just because you—“

“Not a random bloke. Me. Kiss me.”

This is dangerous ground. Somewhere in his libido lies something that he’s thought about. Maybe he’s even fantasised about kissing a man. Having sex with a man. Just a lark, maybe. Don’t lots of men go through that? It doesn’t mean anything.

But, Sherlock. He lived with him for a year and a half, and they’d been friends. And he grieved when Sherlock died. Not grieved like a friend. He’d lost friends before, and this was nothing like those losses. Pain, darkness, unending regret. Even after Mary, some of that darkness remained. Moments when he remembered something Sherlock had said or done, a stab of pain. If it hadn’t been for Mary—

And it came to him. Mary was balm for his wounds. She brought him back from the edge. He is grateful to her. But gratitude isn’t love. Being in such pain for so long, and then a bit of light— that isn’t love, it’s relief. He’s seen patients in physical pain become almost giddy when given a dose of something that takes their agony away, not even enough to make them high. Relief feels like intoxication when pain has gone on so long.

If it hadn’t been for Mary, he would have understood what he’d only begun to see. She helped him, saved him even. But she was a distraction from the pain, not a cure.

He glances at Sherlock, who is pulling back, looking like he wishes he hadn’t just asked for a kiss. Maybe he’ll make a joke about their game, move them towards goodnight, goodbye, see you at the wedding.

“Yes,” he says. It’s an answer to everything— regret, grief, sorrow, love. It’s an apology for not seeing sooner, for the night at the Landmark, for his anger and cruel rejection of the man he has loved for years. “Kiss me.”

* * * * * * * * * *

Sherlock is right. The kiss tells John things he’s tried hard to forget. It tells him that has loved men before, but called it friendship, that he has wanted to touch men and kiss them, and called it lust, or fantasy, or a phase that all men go through. Women attract him too, and he grabbed onto heterosexuality like a life-raft because he was afraid of the alternative. His sister and his father, yelling. Harry thrown out of the house. His father, looking at him, saying not you too. Never you, my boy.

The kiss tells him that has already met the love of his life.

“I need to call Mary,” he says when they break away.

Sherlock looks sad. He nods. “Of course.”

“One more question,” John says. “Who was the second person you loved?”

“It doesn’t matter.”

“It does,” he says. “I’m about to call my fiancee and break our engagement just days before the wedding because I’m in love with my best friend. So please, answer the question.”

Sherlock’s face does something John has never seen. It crumples and tears fill his eyes, and then he’s laughing and crying and not able to speak.

John kisses him again.

Author note: This is an old ficlet, from Trifles, posted here.

#my fics #johnlock #bbc sherlock #stag night #sign of three #fixit fic

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tavina-writes · 6 months

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MDZS Society! aka: there's a lot less killing than you'd expect

This follows from this post and also the recent translations of MXTX’s most recent interview (which I can now no longer bother to find bc this has been sitting in drafts for like, siiiix months? More? Oh god anyway.) which reminded me about my feelings regarding MDZS society and how different it is from the martial societies we see depicted in typical modern wuxia. (Small disclaimer, I am a wuxia genre fiend and I love like, thinking about fictional societies so this is like, “AHA! You’ve unlocked my trap card!”)

For the purposes of this, I’m going to be looking at MDZS/CQL’s depiction of the jianghu (which I think is fairly similar! I don’t actually think the show writers made CQL’s jianghu/martial society more genre typical than it was in the book) and comparing that with modern classic wuxia (mostly Jin Yong and Gu Long works.) For this comparison, I’ll be looking at a Jin Yong book — Legend of the Condor Heroes (which is widely considered the starting point of modern wuxia as a genre) — and one Gu Long book — Dagger Li/Sentimental Swordsman, Ruthless Sword (widely considered his most popular work) — and seeing how their societies differ from MDZS society.

This will likely come in two parts because this one was already getting long, and I don’t think we can fit “how often does nobility exist in a typical jianghu and what do bloodline sects look like normally versus what they look like in MDZS” in this post along with the main topic of “is MDZS society a particularly physically violent place?”

This post discusses how often cultivators are socially expected to kill people. Like, actual living human beings instead of, say, monsters or ghosts which have been categorized differently than like, human beings.

EDIT: I forgot to talk about Dagger Li but this was already much too long sorry. Feel free to hmu for more thoughts though.

Now, it might be easy to think that cultivators killing actual people is a really common thing in MDZS/CQL universe! After all, they do have martial arts training and one of the prominent things about the first life is just how many people die both in the Sunshot Campaign and the fallout afterwards. However, I would argue that a lot of the traumas and related issues and reactions that happen in MDZS happen because cultivators are, by training and education, not actually prepared for killing actual living breathing human beings! (And also that the morality of this world prevents it for the most part)

Now, we do actually get a pretty good window into what the typical training is like for young cultivators in MDZS, because we get a fairly well defined schoolhouse scene where LQR is asking them questions about "how do you tell the difference between various different problems we have to solve?" and "how do you go about fixing this problem?" and none of those include the moral quandary of "if I, a young cultivator out in the Jianghu, see a guy who is doing something I morally disagree with, under what circumstances do I beat him up and/or kill him." This does not appear to enter the curriculum at any point, leading me to believe that the morally correct number of people not like, ghosts or ghouls or fierce corpses, a regular average MDZS cultivator is supposed to have killed is approximately 0.

Which. Is a thing you get in a normal martial arts wuxia jianghu. There is generally the threat of "oh yeah this that or the other faction will be doing shitty things and thereby try to murder you." Instead, in MDZS/CQL most of the heirs of sects are...attending school together. Doing teenage things like partying and gossiping and attending classes.

And sure yes, there was a case of WWX and JZX trying to beat each other up. But the sects did sure let their kids stay at Lan summer camp for months on end (sometimes repeatedly, see NHS) without fearing for their lives or that anyone would steal another sect's techniques or otherwise causing real havoc or intersect warfare etc.

Which is infeasible in any other sort of Jianghu situation. For example, contrast this scenario with this scene from LOCH where Guo Jing's shifus are giving him advice since he is newly 17 and about to set out by himself into the great big world:

Guo Jing therefore bid farewell to his teachers. They had witnessed his battle against the Four Demons of the Yellow River, and were not too greatly worried. The young man had proved that he knew how to use the skills that they taught him. Therefore they let him leave alone. On one hand, the meeting of outlaws in Yanjing worried them greatly, so that they could not ignore it; and on the other hand, a youngster always had to travel the jianghu alone, in order to learn lessons that no teacher could pass on. At the moment of parting, each made their last recommendations. As usual when the Six spoke after one another, Nan Xiren was the last one to express himself. "If you cannot defeat the enemy," he said. "Flee!" He knew that given Guo Jing's dogged character, he would prefer to die rather than to surrender, if he met a master, he would certainly fight to the bitter end, even at the risk of death. That was the reason Nan Xiren gave him this common sense warning. " Martial arts have no limits," added Zhu Cong. " As the proverb says, 'For every peak there is one yet higher', so for every man there is one stronger. Whatever your power, you will always one day meet a foe stronger than you. A true man knows to retreat when necessary, when facing grave danger, it is necessary to contain one's impatience and anger. This what is meant by the adage, « If one preserves the earth and its forests, one does not fear to lack firewood ». It is not therefore not cowardly to take good advice! When the enemy is too numerous and that you cannot face them there, it is especially necessary to avoid being too reckless. Keep in mind Fourth Shifu's advice!"

Does this seem like the sort of advice that any Young MDZS Cultivator would get? "You're a good kid, but when you go out into the world, there will be people who straight up want you dead even though they met you 15 minutes ago, you cannot persist in fighting with these people because they will want you dead and you are a baby cultivator who needs to learn to run away when shit gets rough or you will be dead."

And again I come back to how MDZS cultivators are more like occupational ghostbusters because this really does inform how their society functions and runs and how everyone reacts so badly to the Sunshot Campaign beginning and its aftermaths and possibly explains how JGS could get his way after Sunshot.

Because what happens when you get a society that does train heavily in martial arts and have Able To Kill Real People Weapons who spends most of their time solving very black and white situations of "okay is this ghost whose eating people's livers good or bad? y/n?" and a clear hierarchy of "how do we get rid of the ghost eating people's livers in town x" instead of say "is it morally correct to kill this group of bandits who's been threatening the town" or "is it morally correct to kill this shitty businessman who's been holding people hostage and threatening to hack off their limbs" you have a reduced level of philosophical musing on like, "what is the purpose of martial arts, which is designed to kill people and what do I use martial arts for?" and "under what circumstances and situations would I personally find it morally correct to kill a man?" Which are all questions that Wuxia coming of age stories typically have, and I think MDZS does have, but expressed differently.

Again, it appears that the number of Real Live Human Beings that it is morally acceptable to have stabbed in your life is approximately 0 in this universe, and the expectation that you, personally, might have to fend off people trying to stab you over brunch is also approximately 0.

This also leads to a situation where like, questions of vengeance have very difficult escape hatches! If your parents are murdered on the job by an evil rampaging ghost, this is very sad and tragic and now you're an orphan and of course that's not good, but this is a occupational job hazard, not like, "Yeah Joe Bob from the sect down the street murdered my dad because #Reasons~, and now it's my legacy to grow up to murder Job Bob from the sect down the street to avenge my dad."

(I have a whole essay about how this pertains to both of the Nie Brothers, and how it pertains to JGY and also Jin Ling, and how this seems to routinely fuck people up in MDZS in a very specific way we don't typically see in other wuxias, but this is getting SO long as it is).

But yeah "the socially acceptable number of real living people (instead of ghosts or demons or fierce corpses or whatever) to have killed in your lifetime as a cultivator is approximately 0" means that the Sunshot Generation gets really really fucked up by all of this "killing real people" they did.

Which! might be why JFM was so slow to move on "yeah the Wen are threatening to kill your heirs." <- socially inconceivable behavior. Why society in general is so shocked by Xue Yang and the murder of the Chang <- which would be bad normally but not quite like this. And why no one did anything specific about JGS even if they felt he wasn't entirely correct. What are they going to threaten him with? Death???? A trial of his peers? Social Shunning??? Public shame???

"But Tav how does this relate to CQL!Su She's morality?" I hear you ask. Well you see, the question of "he should've been ready to die for his sect!" is utterly baffling in a society where nobody is expected to be ready to die for their sect on a regular basis because the idea that you should be ready for someone trying to stab you before brunch is utterly nonsensical in a world where most people expect that the baseline number of murders a cultivator does in their lifetimes is 0. That's the world he lives in.

On this regard CQL!Su She is utterly blameless. Nobody handed him a rulebook or expectations sheet for "the sect down the street will try to kill you" nor SHOULD they expect he'd be ready to die at a drop of a hat when no part of the education or social expectations include "ready to die for your sect because it's routine for people to try to kill you."

If you don't even expect to be stabbed and possibly die at a discussion conference where there are lots of cultivators from many sects why on EARTH would you expect to be facing down death in your own home when there's. cultivators here to kill you, this situation is so out of left field?

#modao zushi #mdzs #meta #my meta #su she #this is not a society *without* violence to be clear #but it's not the sort of place where it'll have been acceptable to murder and maim before breakfast #and that's why traumas happen as they do #I've been sitting on this for ages #please don't discourse in my notes about if 'murder' is a good thing or a bad thing #this is just an observation on like #'is it societally common for cultivators to run around killing people?'#the answer to this question is no

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sitp-recs · 1 month

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Heyy, do you have any drarry fic recs wherein Harry is living his quiet life in a cottage? Thank youu :D

Hi anon, yes absolutely! I love this trope, you’ll find most of my recs on this recluse!Harry list and this cottagecore list. I’m adding a few more fics below, all of them with Harry as the cottage owner. Envoy!

Glowing by @cavendishbutterfly (T, 10k)

Harry's lived alone and vampiric in his cottage for ages, until a long-lived Draco Malfoy suddenly shows up to answer an advertisement Harry had practically forgotten he'd put in the Prophet. Cue soft blood drinking, quiet nights of reading and crocheting, and Harry thinking that maybe--just maybe--he might not be so alone anymore.

Twelve Moons by @corvuscrowned (T, 27k)

Harry Potter lives a quiet life, running an inn with his two best friends. Once a month, Draco Malfoy comes to stay. A real-time fic that takes place over the course of a year; updates every full moon.

Simulation Theory by @starquestingfordrarry (E, 35k)

An offer to test out a new invention for Weasleys’ Wizard Wheezes turns into a whole lot more when Harry discovers who has the other part of the paired set.

All Roads by korlaena, Saulaie (M, 36k)

Draco hates his job at the Prophet. He hates it even more when he’s assigned to write an article on Harry Potter, who left the country three years ago after their falling out. Draco doesn’t want to face the truth about himself, but he’s stuck between Harry and his duty, and he’s out of options.

Starlight in the Void by @dodgerkedavra (E, 40k)

An overgrown cottage in an unassuming seaside village is the perfect place for Harry Potter’s fresh start. Harry gets two weeks of peace before he hears rumors of a mysterious hermit wizard who lives in a stone tower in the woods.

Through the May Air, Over the Ocean by tsauergrass (T, 45k)

Draco Malfoy never expected to find himself in Scotland or being stuck in a cottage with Potter—but wonders never cease. A story about warmth, a story about falling back in love. A story about a flock of sheep in the distant fells of Scotland.

The Bolthole by aideomai, Tepre (E, 54k)

Harry is a hoarder, Draco is grief-stricken, and both are capable human adults who can definitely spend a month in a cottage in the Cotswolds together without ever talking about the time they slept together in eighth year. Yeah, no, totally.

When It Alteration Finds by momatu (E, 55k)

After the war, Harry left most of the Wizarding world behind and built a new life for himself in the Channel Islands. He opened a bakery and is happy with his life. Draco is a fiction author who writes under a penname, and he's currently suffering from writer's block. His agent suggests he try writing in a new environment and rents a cottage in the Channel Islands for him.

A Sword Laid Aside by @korlaena (E, 128k)

When Draco’s cover is blown during a deep undercover operation and the Ministry is compromised, Ron takes Draco to the only safe place he can think of—Potter. Hiding out with a taciturn Harry Potter, who has been missing from the Wizarding World for almost two decades after a shocking fall from grace, is nothing like Draco thought it would be.

Bonus: a dark!Harry fic 😈

Now I Wake Up In The Night and Watch You Breathe by @hoko-onchi-writes (E, 24k)

Or: Harry has been pining for years. It's time he finally makes his dreams come true.

#asks #anon #Drarry reclist #cottagecore #recluse Harry

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tarothouselattier · 10 months

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I’m doing good, I’m on some new shit Been saying «YES» instead of «NO» - - the 1 by Taylor Swift

What you need to say "YES" to,

instead of the usual "NO"

all the images are from pinterest

This reading turned out to be not what I was expecting, but I feel like this is even better. There are some heartfelt moving messages and also some harsh necessary truths that will ultimately benefit you. I just hope you enjoy this one, like I did!

PLS feel free to share your thoughts and impressions with me in my ask box or message me. There is nothing I value more in this blog than human connection!!

If you're not sure how to choose a pile, what I like to do is observe image, close my eyes and while taking a few deep breaths I repeat the question in my mind and ask spirit to guide me to my pile. After I open my eyes observe the piles again and one or more usually stands out to me. It just buzzes with energy. | just can't tear my gaze away.

No matter what, I come back to that pile.

If this is not your way of doing things, I asked my spirit guides to help me choose a photo that correlates specifically with you and your energy. Even the text "Pile" I chose for you based on your energy. So, feel free to just choose what you like.

PILE 1 🫸🫷

SAY “YES” to:

choosing yourself as you are rn and crowning yourself as a Queen

moving yourself and your world forward

taking the sword in your own hands

you are my lady in waiting. Which is weird because you’re actually the Queen of swords, all of the Queens in tarot are bad bitches and they’re the leaders of their own life, but it’s like you are waiting for someone to give you your sword. You need to realise that that sword is your life and all your life energy it comes from you not out. You just really remind me of the Timothée Chalamet quote “you need to realise that the life comes from you and not at/to you” yeah, something similar he said.

honestly pile 1 am flabbergasted with you. Can you imagine, IMAGINE the Queen of swords. LITERAL Queen of swords, like an actual real-life figure and she’s waiting for someone to give her a sword. Is she really THE Queen of swords if she’s waiting for someone to give her her own sword.

YOU NEED TO MOVE. It’s like if your leg was cranking up and making you uncomfortable you still wouldn’t move it. Nobody’s gonna do it for you.

You need to say YES to yourself, to your potential, to your actuality, to your abundance, to the money that you want and you know I don’t know why but like fame and recognition are coming through strongly. Create your own World. Collect all your Ls and be like okay, okay goodbye I’m taking this and I’m going away. And at least, AT LEAST .I’m moving .

Yeah, you may be down, really really down but you still got you you still can move, and that’s truly all you need to say yes to. MOVING. Because it’s like you you’re making it seem like you were stuck, I don’t even know, up with ivy and you’re just cornered into a wall and you were glued.

Obstacles and your past are not the things that are stopping you from your abundance and you living your best life and being the most incredible version of you. Yeah you may have made mistakes but your mistakes aren’t holding you back, you are holding onto your own mistakes. You are stuck in the labyrinth of your own mind. You need to move. forget about the past I just need to move. You thoughts don’t make your life. YOU make your life. It’s OK to grow and change. What is not OK is thinking you can’t!

Pile 2 ☀️ You are my sweetie honey-pumpkin pie. Here's a hug and a celebratory hurray for what's ahead of you!

you need to say YES to:

start getting dressed more fancy, the way you like.

say yes to your graceful elegant side.

Also you need to say yes to being more gentle with yourself. It’s okay to not rush with your feelings if you still feel hurt and shocked.

"Start looking forward and stop looking back" - What's the use of feeling Blue? Song from Steven Universe. My personal favourite quote for situations llike this. (You won't believe it but I once channeled it from Jinx oddly enough. She gave me great advice)

getting excited about your own life!

It’s like you feel that you missed your chance on something, or something in your life did not turn out the way it was supposed to it’s over and you just can’t accept that it’s over.

I can't make this shit up. The card that flew out next was the 2 of cups.

Did you go through a breakup recently?

If so, then I am with you. To be honest, I’ve noticed that people are literally collectively going through breakups right now. Doesn’t matter if it’s a relationship that lasted for years or several months. EVERYONE is breaking up right now. I swear to you. Me included. I’m with you, honey🥹❤️❤️

Okay, I fully understand now what I need to say to you.

I know how much it hurts. Trust me, I’ve gone through the same thing a week ago. It was a 4 year relationship. But it was dying. There is no saving the wilted flowers. They blessed your life with their beaty, served their time and left space for the next amazing thing to come in their place. Say yes to letting it go! Say "yes"! Understand, this was for the best! And you need to start thinking about yourself. What is over is already over and done with. You cannot get it back, you cannot change it. You need to understand, this break up, this thing, it happened. "There is happiness after you, but there was happiness because of you" I PROMISE YOU you need to get excited honestly say yes to getting excited. This is a new chapter in your life and let me tell you, I feel like you’re gonna be, man.. if I like you were in the dark, this whole whole freaking time and you’re kind of amazed how it’s over, but somehow there’s a glimmer of hope and you might actually feel better than you thought you would. And I keep hearing "bedazzled". You need to be out there at the frontlines of your life. You need to let your spark shine, don’t feel guilty. Feel sad, but also understand that the person may not have been your future but they did turn out to be your past instead. And they were there and it’s amazing, and now is the start of your next chapter and let me tell you, it’s gonna be exciting!! You need to like, you need to get excited about this, truly. Move don’t be pushed around by the paast that you own. Don’t stay stuck in the same place. Don’t let these thoughts and whatever there is overcome you. There is no need, you’re the Queen! The boss of your own life! Think about the fancy stuff that you want to buy for yourself, the concert tickets that you want.. I might be projecting, but truly this is a collective thing right now so I feel like I’m speaking to you as a friend, but also this is literally what the cards are saying. Your life will literally glimmer and shine as the Sun and the stars. Take control of your life. Be the leader of change. All of the things that you want to do. It’s time! it’s time to make plans and make them come to life because this is the going forward. It's the only thing that will make you feel better, not dwelling on the past. It’s over. It’s okay to relax into your bright future. HELL, into your bright present. Notice how you feel lighter. It's like you finally cleaned out your old closet. Like you felt heavy and stressed all this time without knowing why. And when you broke up you realised that the person that you so loved was the last thing holding you back. And you finally feel fresh. Finally feel like you have your whole life ahead of you. Breath and breathe out. The only one you need to love you is YOU!

But still, I love you! ❤️❤️☀️

Songs you might enjoy at this particular time(besides:

Bejeweled - Taylor Swift

Happiness- Taylor Swift

Midnight shy - Miley Cyrus

Truth hurts - Lizzo

Break free - Ariana Grande

Clean - Taylor Swift

Thank u, next - Ariana Grande

Honestly, the Renaissance album is the vibe rn, but skip the love songs, if you’re still uncomfy.

Additional picture-messages for you that I channeled

Pile 3 My dragons🐲

I strongly feel you were given a precious gift in this life, a divine gift, truly.

YOU MUST SAY YES TO THIS OR ELSE!!!:

YOUR WILDEST DREAMS AND PLANS

SEEING YOUR VISION THROUGH TILL THE END NO MATTER THE COST

MAKE YOUR PROJECT/DREAM/DESIRE A REALITY RN OR I'LL BITE YOUR EAR OFF(affectionate)

RAGE AND SEE YOUR OWN WORTH

“YOU'VE NEVER GIVEN UP ON ANYTHING IN YOUR LIFE. SO DON'T YOU DARE START NOW”

When I was channeling your pile:

What I meant to say: “my caterpillars, turning into butterflies”.

What I actually said: “ah, my butterflies, turning into caterpillars”. 💀

Crying rn.

Believe in yourself, no matter your doubts. You’re actually turning into a butterfly. You not believing in yourself is the only thing stopping you from seeing it. Believe and speed up the transformation.

I then heard “my dragons” ssoooo.

It’s you. You are my dragons.

I feel so strongly for you pile 3!!!!!! DON'T YOU DARE be careless with your gift, whatever it may be. Weather it refers to your inner power, or maybe an idea that you want to bring to life. Don’t you dare miss this opportunity because of your fears or your disbelief in yourself. You are this powerful for a reason don’t you dare give it up!!!!!!!! Don’t you dare be careless.

This is as much of a warning as it is advice and I advise you, I demand of you strongly! Don’t you dare pass up this opportunitybecause you think you are incompetent or not good enough, any of that crap. You doubt yourself for literally no reason, don’t let it cloud your judgement or stop you from taking action. You might believe what you believe but still do it anyway. You have a brain, you have hands. You may not think the best of yourself rn, but at least rage and be like: "like hell I'm about to let it go with the wind!!! NEVER." Because I feel like you’re extremely gifted psychically, or you have something to offer that only you and no one else can. it’s like you have a spark in you, it’s amazing. YOU are the one who is meant to bring it to life. I am just, wow. This is so incredible that I am kind of speechless and all I can do is be like "don’t you dare be careless with that, don’t you dare be lazy, don’t you dare doubt yourself"

You need to be worried about giving up, so don’t you dare give up!!! See it through whatever idea that you have. I don’t care, no matter what, put your blood sweat and tears into it and all of your burning passion and desire and your life force and see it through. BRING THIS SHIT TO COMPLETION. You will receive something MAJOR. the divine is on your side. Don’t you dare lose this halfway. Don’t lose yourself. This is crucial right now.

I keep hearing this part of a song, and the words “like I believe in you” . I was thinking whether it’s like a Disney song but I believe this is a Steven universe song and I love my animation, It's an incredible song. the song is called "Who we are". it goes "and I believe in them, and I believe in yOuuuuu". The whole song is a bomb that you need rn. Listen to the song or catch these hands.

like oh my God say yes yes say yes all "t baby can you bring me all the way" from a Beyonce song on the Renaissance album. Now it is not time to give up. Now it’s not time to suddenly be like "oh well, guess I’m not good enough, guess it’s not bringing me anything" SAY NO TO BETRAYING YOUR VALUES. SAY NO TO BETRAYING YOUR OWN SELF". I know this reading is supposed to be about what you should say YES to, but in order to lit a fire under your ass I need to be counterproductive like you seem to be right now. Don’t give up cause you fucking doubt yourself, okay!? I’m mad right now because I believe in you so passionately and whloeheartedly. I would literally, I don’t know, fight you and shake you by the shoulders with how much I believe in you and how much I want to see you shine it’s crazy. I swear like DM me or put an ask in my ask box and tell me what it is that you want to do in this world because oh my God, oh my God, I’ll be your listener, your viewer...not your buyer at this moment because I don’t have money right now, but I will definitely be your supporter!!!! I want you to win, baby, so win!

The universe wants you to win, most of all you are the 1. You have to be the one who wants you to win the most!!! There’s nobody stronger than you. Forget even "higher power" Only pay attantion to yourself. You are the force!!!! so bring it on!!! Also, by the way, I’m a pile three girly as well, like strongly. You are my spirit friend, spiritual siblings, so I also have some dreams. So if you like, feel free to message me or put an ask in my box.

I love you and I am moved by your extremely powerful energy. I was like welling up with inspiration and drive. I feel like Nicki Minaj right now with this particular quote: “barbz, don’t you dare be lazy. Stay in school”

Additional picture-messages for you that I channeled

#tarot #free tarot readings #tarot community #pick a card #pick a pile #tarothouselattier #pac #tarot pick a pile #tarot pick a card #taylor swift inspired tarot #the 1 tarot

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ronwestbreeze · 1 year

Text

TO YOU , WORLDS AWAY : PART ONE : CHAPTER ELEVEN

pairing: jake sully x human!fem!reader

summary: we won...we won...

warnings: angst but that's to be expected in a battle...

word count: 4.7k

author's note: and this is the last chapter to part one! thank you all for staying so long to finish and hopefully you all will continue to stay for this story well into part two! so without further ado, chapter eleven!!

AO3 | prev | next

When the morning came, the Sky People took flight. And you realized then, watching them take to the skies as if it was theirs to claim, that you had always belonged on land.

You were always meant to watch them fly, you were always meant to be the onlooker until the time came to shoot them out of the sky.

You were the hunter. They were the bids. Perhaps it was the other way around before. Then it would be fitting in this life to seek revenge, continuing the cycle until there was no more left in you. Maybe that was the meaning of life. Repeating, repeating, repeating, and repeating until there is nothing left. On this day, you would allow the cycle to continue just this one.

Maybe in your next life you’ll try something different.

Before they all took off for battle, you had been sleeping in the ship you and Trudy had arrived back at Hell’s Gate in. Trudy came back as early as she could to let you know that all the other pilots thought the ship you were in was damaged and she was moving it to have it fixed. But really she was hiding it in an empty hanger for you to later take off once you’ve finished planting the bombs.

“Thanks, Chacon.” You nod to her right after she explained the basics of controlling her Samson ship and handing you a stolen soldier’s uniform.

Trudy shrugged, “Yeah, yeah, just try to survive this, Doc. It’s gonna get ugly real soon.”

“I’m counting on it.”

After the fleet took off for the battle, you waited for a while in the ship, quietly counting to ten until finally you changed into the uniform and left to work.

Fortunately for you, it was an easy maneuver around Hell’s Gate without being stopped and questioned by a random soldier since a majority of them were out in the battlefield.

The first place you set your first bomb up at was the Armor Bay. This was one of their main sources of weapons and you had no doubt they used it to their advantage in the current battle. If anything, they probably had a greater advantage over the Na’vi because of the advanced technology. Which could possibly guarantee a win.

You tried not to think about that. You had faith in Jake and the others. The Na’vi were fierce and you had no doubt that they would fight until their last breath to win their land back once and for all. And you would give them the advantages that they need by cutting the RDA off at their roots.

The branches had already grown, yes, but it won’t matter in the end when the entire tree falls.

The second bomb would be placed where the barracks, the apartments, and all the living quarters were. Third and fourth were placed in one of the communications towers that linked the main base to the others out on the battlefield.. If a couple of them were to fall, the rest would go down with it from the impact.

You saved the last four for the main building where everything took place. That was their source of communication to the fleet, their eyes on the battle to watch and cheer as their side succeeded. Entering the building was a bit difficult. You had to avoid the cameras, make sure your face wouldn’t be caught. You knew the Ops Center was the main one you wanted to hit but you couldn’t exactly just waltz in there, place the bomb, and then leave without anyone noticing.

Instead, you had to be a bit more strategic about your placement. So, you found a tunnel that led to the Operations Center and placed the sixth one in a vent. A soldier had walked by and you ducked your head down to pass him, not before snatching his radio without him noticing. The last two were placed in some of the labs.

Now you were back in Trudy’s Samson with the Key and the radio in your hands. From the radio you could hear what was going on in the battlefield as different voices came in and out, reporting updates back to the Operations Center. Everything in you made you want to push the button and get on the ship and leave them all to die, giving them no time to realize what was happening.

But there was a part of you that hesitated. There were still good people here, good people like Max Patel trying to help your side win. And then there was Quaritch’s son. He was still here somewhere in Hell’s Gate. Why the bastard kept the baby here was beyond you but it stopped you nonetheless.

In a way you didn’t owe them anything, you didn’t owe them your sympathy. But at the same time that little baby didn’t ask to be born in all of this. Didn’t ask to die because of his parents’ actions.

And because of this, it led you to bring the radio to your lips and form the next words that fell from your mouth.

“Attention Hell’s Gate. To those who are familiar with me, I need no introduction. To those who haven’t heard of me, my name is Dr. Y/N L/N. I’m gonna cut to the chase and let y’all know I’ve planted eight bombs that would go off at any second. Now, I am being merciful—even though it is the last thing any of you deserve—I will be giving you a fifteen minute head start to pack your shit up and leave Pandora for good. If you don’t, well, we’ll all meet each other in hell hopefully.”

Immediately there was static in the radio until Parker’s voice came through, “Who the hell do you think you are?! You have no authority to give any orders, much less threaten us—I need soldiers out there finding her and arresting her now!”

You sighed, “I thought you’d say that, Parker.”

Getting off the ship, you fished out the Key, fixing the settings a bit before pointing it toward the direction of the communications tower. Once you pressed the button, nothing happened for a few seconds.

In the next second, one of the towers exploded, shaking the ground beneath you. Even the sheer force of it nearly knocked you over from where you stood in the hangar. The radio glitched with voices cutting in and out, quickly losing signal with each other. And before you lost signal, you said to Parker.

“Fourteen minutes, Selfridge. Make it count.” You dropped the radio to the ground, stomped on it until it was broken into pathetic pieces, and set your watch to fourteen minutes.

You went back onto the Samson and sat there. Waiting.

A part of you knew Parker wouldn’t listen despite the display you had just shown. Hell, he might’ve been sending people out now to find the bombs and unarm them. Good thing it wasn’t designed to be unarmed. Good thing you had wasted two years of your life perfecting the perfect death trap. Good thing.

Twelve minutes.

“You are too smart to be doing this, Y/N.”

You were eleven when your mother told you this.

One of the very few conversations you did have with her. And most of the time it was her scolding you. Really, it was your own fault. At the time, you thought that acting out—especially in school—would’ve gotten her attention. Would have gotten her to pay more attention to you, would have gotten her to finally be a mother. Be there.

But instead it was always a bother, as if she was doing you a favor by taking time out of her day to pick you up. That you should be so lucky to see your own mother.

“Punching some stupid boy just because you lost your temper? I did not raise you to act so foolishly!” She scolded you while her fingers quickly moved across her phone screen.

You didn’t raise me at all, was what sat at the tip of your tongue. But it never came out. You never said anything, really.

After finishing with whatever it was that was far more important on her phone than speaking with her own child, your mother sighed exhaustedly. “You are too much sometimes…too much like him….just too much…”

You didn’t mean to be too much. All you wanted was to just be enough.

Ten minutes.

You were eight when you asked your father to teach you how to fight.

“I don’t know, kiddo.” He would respond. Though at the time, you never realized how truly tired he always looked. How numb he had become. You were still trapped in your own childlike ignorance. You were always looking at him as some type of hero when really you were just too young, too naïve, too late to see his humanity. “It takes a lot of discipline and…well, I want you to be a kid first before you start worrying about that stuff.”

“But I don’t want to be just a kid!” You’d whine. “I wanna be tough and strong like you, Dad! I want to be able to defend myself against the mean kids at school.”

“Sometimes, you just have to walk away, kid. Let it go—”

“But that doesn’t always work!” You frowned, pleadingly. “They always come back to pick on me. No matter how many times I try to ignore them, they always come back. I want to fight them, Dad! I want to show them they can’t mess with me anymore!”

You remembered pleading with him, you remembered practically begging him.

He never did though. There was never enough time with him.

It always seemed like you never had enough time with the people that you loved.

Seven minutes.

You were fourteen when Quaritch finally showed you how to fight.

After another takedown, you lay there, wincing from the sourness and the growing bruise at the side of your face. You saw through your blurred vision, your opponent standing over you. And then seconds later Quaritch appeared, shaking his head.

“You keep leaving him open to your weakness, kid. You’d be dead in seconds in a real fight.”

“Yeah, yeah,” You grumbled from the floor. Eventually, you slowly sat up trying not to cringe when your side stung at your sudden movement. “I wanna go again.”

Quaritch laughed, “Child prodigy in brains yet not the brightest at times. You’re down, kid. There is no going again.”

You shook your head stubbornly, “You taught me that giving up was the coward’s way. That they weren’t a real soldier.”

“You’re not a soldier, kid.”

“But I’m not a coward either.” You pushed yourself to your feet, ignoring the frown from Quaritch as you raised your fists up to your opponent again. “We’re going again. Hit me.” Your opponent glanced toward Quaritch, your jaw tightened. “Hit me!”

A smirk grew onto the man’s face, “Atta girl.” He nodded toward your opponent. “Go at it. Let’s see how long she stays standing this time.”

Five minutes.

Through one of the windows of the Samson, you spotted a few people loading onto the last of the Valkyries. It seemed some of them were heeding your warning. Perhaps Max was among them, getting the most people out that he could.

Your grip on the Key tightened. Your heart pounding against your chest. The battle was still going though. Time had to go by faster. You needed to give the others an advantage. And it was hard too because now that the communications towers were destroyed, you were left in the dark about the battle as much as the others.

All you had was fire and a prayer to Eywa.

You were never one to be religious.

Four minutes.

“You have so much anger in you.” Sylwanin told you once.

It had to have been around the time Grace’s school was still open. When you were in your avatar every chance you got. When Sylwanin was alive and well, when her kind smile was still fresh in your mind. When the children were all so lively and excited to come.

You frowned at her as the both of you walked along the path in the forest leading back to the school. “I’m not angry.”

Sylwanin hummed. “You've gotten better with our language. Sa’nok has been teaching you, yes?”

Sa’nok? Right, that was what they called Grace sometimes. What did it mean again? “Yes. I’m still rusty though…” Your mind was still on her previous comment. “Why do you think I’m angry?”

She shrugged as she knelt down toward the ground, running her fingers through the dirt. “Tsu’tey has it too. Toward the Sky People. Yours is similar to his anger.” She then looked up at you curiously. “Tell me, tsmuke. Why are you angry with your own kind?”

“Are you not?” You asked, furrowing your brows. You hugged yourself. Back then it still felt strange being in your avatar’s body. Getting used to the new height, the blue skin rather than your usual skin color, the long braid. It was still a lot to get used to.

“Of course I am. They’ve invaded my home and are determined to make it their own. It is not right.” You saw the same fierceness in her eyes that you’d see in Tsu’tey whenever he spoke of the Sky People. “But…I understand that there are good ones among the demons.” She smiled up at you. “You are good, tsmuke.”

You frowned, heart feeling heavy. “B-But I am Sky People. How can you see me as good?”

“Because you are my friend, Y/N.” Sylwanin told you in English, surprising you. “And you have good heart. Strong heart.”

“I don’t know what that means.”

Sylwanin rolled her eyes before standing, “You never do. I can not show you what you refuse to see, tsmuke.” She tugged at your arm toward the direction of where the school was. “Come, let’s go before sa’nok becomes worried.”

You furrowed your brows, “Why do you call Dr. Augustine sa’nok?”

“You don’t?”

“No… I don’t know what it means.”

Sylwanin shook her head as the two of you continued walking, “The children see her as a mother. Sa’nok.”

Oh.

You remembered feeling warm when you learned of that. Whenever they called Grace sa’nok, you had already assumed it was some sort of term of endearment in their language. You just never knew what it meant until now.

Sa’nok. What a fitting title.

Two minutes.

You spotted the soldiers before the bullets came flying.

You dived into the back of the ship as they began shooting, making sure your mask was on straight and hadn’t gotten hit by any stray bullets. Quickly, you crawled toward the cockpit, keeping your head down whenever a bullet came too close to hitting you.

Once you reached the cockpit, you threw yourself into the pilot’s seat. Remembering what Trudy had shown you and starting the Samson.

“She’s on the ship!” You hear one of them shout from outside.

“She ain’t goin’ nowhere!”

One minute—

“Ah fuck it.” You mumbled. The Samson was off the ground and flying out of the hangar. Because you weren’t a pilot, the ship swerved a bit on the lift off, nearly running into the soldiers that were shooting at you. Fortunately, that gave you enough time to grab the Key, switch the settings back to what you had planned and pressed the button.

Quickly, you steered the ship up toward the sky.

You felt the force before you saw the orange colors rising to the sky.

From high above, you never saw the explosion but you saw the aftermath of it. There was so much smoke and fire, so much destruction. Hell’s Gate was barely recognizable. You hoped this was enough. You hoped it was all worth it.

Grace had begged you. And you intended to try. You really wanted to try. Even after all of this, even if she doubted it, even if it was dangerous. You wanted to try.

Then again, you were never one to listen to her orders. Not all of it at least.

At least it wouldn’t be your fault this time.

You saw the ship behind you. Some of it was on fire but it was still flying fine. Its guns were now pointed at you.

“Damn it.” You sighed tiredly. “You guys just won’t make this easy on me.”

The guns went blazing toward you. With every bit of your strength, you swerved the ship out of the way of the blasts. The smoke made it difficult to see the other ship which meant the ship couldn’t really see you either. But unfortunately, that didn’t stop it from shooting aimlessly.

Suddenly, the ship’s radio came to life. It was the only communications link that was still intact, but only between all the other ships, not to Hell’s Gate.

“Y/N.” Quaritch voice cut through the static radio. Your jaw tightened. “I know you can hear me.”

You swerved the ship out of the way of another round of bullets flying your way.

“That little stunt you pulled with the communications tower? Could very well get you killed so I suggest you turn yourself in before things get worse for you.”

For a moment, while trying to steer the ship away from the destruction, you wondered if he knew the extent of what you did. That he’d be this lenient with you if he had known that you were the cause of the destruction to Hell’s Gate.

There were muffled shouts and crashes you heard from his side. But it sounded further away, almost as if he was in some sort of isolated room while he talked directly to you.

His voice sounded lower, quieter when he continued, “It’s not too late for you, Y/N. Don’t be like your foolish father. Don’t get yourself killed over this. Don’t be a fucking—”

You switched the radio off, eyes welling with tears.

Stop pretending you care. Stop fucking pretending—

The right wing was suddenly hit, startling you out of your swimming thoughts. You had barely made it away from Hell’s Gate and the ship that had been shooting at you had reappeared from the smoke and was now right behind you, shooting at your ship. The glass broke from the shots and the right wing had caught fire.

You hadn’t been thinking. The other ship was at your side now and since yours was already going down you, in your last attempt, swerved your ship into theirs. Taking it down with you.

Smoke was the last thing you saw.

For the longest time, you weren’t really sure what death felt like when it came. You often wondered this when your father died. What did he feel when he knew he was going to die? What did your mother see before death had claimed her? Did Sylwanin know that she would die? Was Grace truly ready to leave?

Did they feel alone? Did they cry once they realized…?

For this you did not cry.

Instead your smile was gasoline.

And the fire followed.

The radio that connected him to you had suddenly gone dead. Miles Quaritch did not have enough time to figure out what that meant.

One of the wings on the C-21 Dragon had just been blown off by Jake Sully. Most of his men were now dying. They had only been winning seconds before. All he did know was that he had to finish this, he had to put an end to that traitor for good.

Later he would find you. Later.

Your mask had been broken before. You could’ve sworn…

The fire and dying trees surrounded your weakening vision. The heat penetrating your skin harshly.

You were dying.

Was it supposed to be this painful? You couldn’t feel your right leg…

Tsu’tey had been badly injured. A few Na’vi warriors had told Jake this soon after his fight with Quaritch. And now he and Neytiri were both running through the forest, in search of the fallen warrior.

Some of him hoped it wasn’t severe, and wasn't lethal. For your sake. Jake had watched you lose Grace, and had lost so many people before. He hoped they didn’t lose another.

But hope in war was that of a myth.

When Jake saw Tsu’tey, his chest tightened. He was bleeding badly when Jake knelt down next to him. They both knew right here right now that he wasn’t going to make it. That it was too great of a wound to survive.

“Oel ngati kameie, Jakesully.” Tsu’tey croaked upon seeing him.

Jake nodded and whispered, “I see you, brother.”

Tsu’tey breathed heavily, trying to catch his breath while holding his chest where most of the blood had come from. “A-Are The People safe?”

“Yes, yes, they’re safe.” Jake nodded reassuringly to him.

Tsu’tey winced, coughing, “I can’t….I cannot lead the People. Y-You must lead them, Jakesully.”

It felt as if the whole world now looked upon Jake Sully. This wasn’t what he expected nor really wanted. All he wanted was for them to win this war. To win against the Sky People. Jake was not fit to lead a clan…he wasn’t, right?

Jake chuckled in disbelief at the request, “I'm not officer material.”

“It is decided.” Tsu’tey insisted weakly before grabbing onto Jake’s hand, guiding it toward his knife to bring it out. “Now do the duty of Olo'eyktan.”

Jake shook his head, wanting to drop the knife from his hand right then and there. “I will not kill you—”

“It is the way!” Tsu’tey continued firmly, squeezing Jake’s hand.

But Jake continued shaking his head, “I can’t—brother—I cannot kill you…” His voice was barely above a whisper. “She will not forgive me if I do this.”

Hearing this, Neytiri frowned sadly, placing a hand on Tsu’tey’s shoulder. Jake half expected the warrior to continue and insist he do it. Half of him didn’t think Tsu’tey heard him at all when he mentioned you and how worried he was of your reaction to this. You’ve already lost so much.

But the way Tsu’tey smiled, softly and almost fondly, laid what growing fears Jake had to rest. “I know my tsmuke. You know her. She will forgive….And it is good…I will be remembered. I fought... with Toruk Makto! And we were brothers. And he... was my last shadow….” There would be no other choice then. There was no changing a dying man’s last wish. A warrior at that. And it was just as he had said, it is the way. Jake spent a long time with them to know that he could not go against it. Not after all of this. Not after all he had been taught.

There was a look of peace on Tsu’tey’s face as he lied his head back against the rock, waiting for Jake to finish it. And before Jake plunged the knife into him, he heard him quietly say to himself, a sad look suddenly falling on his face.

“Ah, I do not feel her anymore…”

Oel ngati kameie, ma tsmukan, ulte ngaru seiyi irayo. Ngari hu Eywa salew tirea, tokx 'ì'awn slu Na'viyä hapxì.

Tsu’tey te Rongloa Ateyitan was now with Eywa. Another life lost. And now the role of Olo’eyktan had fallen onto his shoulders. The People now looked to him as their leader. Toruk Makto.

But all he could think about was you.

I do not feel her anymore.

Jake raised his head, realization hitting him like a heavy wave. His chest tightening.

He looked at the others with wide eyes.

“Where’s Y/N?”

Hell’s Gate was destroyed. When Jake had led most of the clan back there to send the rest of the aliens back to their dying planet, the place was unrecognizable. There were still surviving aliens, some badly injured from the attack while others were well enough to be walked toward the shuttles that would lead them off of Pandora.

Jake had sent a few warriors out to search for you when your body was not discovered among the dead. After Max told him what happened, what you had done, Jake didn’t really know what to think. He couldn’t think. All he wanted was the RDA off the planet and to find you safe and sound somewhere, waiting for him to find you.

You being dead wasn’t an option. He simply couldn’t imagine that. You were too strong, too unkillable in his eyes. Perhaps he was stretching his hope too thin, perhaps he had gained a bit of naivety.

But you were not dead. You were not.

Some of what was left of Hell’s Gate was salvageable. The Avatar Compound, the incubators, the main link room. All of it was untouched by you. And of course it had.

Two ships were found just a few miles outside of Hell’s Gate. Both horribly damaged. One body, too unrecognizably burnt to tell who it belonged to. Jake just hoped it didn’t belong to you.

That same night he found your avatar still at the Tree of Souls. Jake got closer to find it still lying limp there, no sign of your consciousness attached to it. Just the avatar. Empty. Even when he knelt down and held your avatar in his arms it felt nothing like you. Just cold and lifeless.

He couldn’t imagine your human body like this. He couldn’t.

All he could do was gently caress your avatar’s cheek with his thumb, wondering if he should accept defeat. Wondering if it was too late.

Wondering if you all really had very little time in the end.

“Don’t burn the damn toast, Tinkers!” Grace scolded when she joined you at the stove.

You frowned, “I’m literally not! You haven’t even given me a chance yet!”

“I told you not to leave her alone with the breakfast again.” You heard Jake mutter causing you to glare over at him. He smirked when he saw your agitated face, “Last time that happened she nearly burned the whole place down.”

“Nobody asked you, Puppet.”

“Place nice, Tinkers.”

“Yeah, play nice Tinkers.”

You scowled at Jake, trying not to ignore the way your face grew hot when he looked up at you with a big smile. It was supposed to be provoking, supposed to get on your nerves. But lately, you couldn’t help but want to return those smiles at one point.

Right now you wouldn’t. No, you were far too stubborn right now to do so.

Norm then entered, looking like had just rolled out of bed. He scrunched up his nose, “What’s burning?”

“It’s not burning!” You snapped as Jake laughed.

Grace nudged your shoulder, “Well, it will burn once you stop tryin’ to prove to them how you’re totally not a bad cook.”

“Ugh! You’re distracting me.”

“You’re supposed to have iron focus. Which is something you should be familiar with, child prodigy.” Grace smirked teasingly at you. She then nodded toward the table Jake was at, “Go sit, I’ll finish up.”

You grumbled, “You’re sure.”

“Oh definitely.”

“Fuck you.”

Grace grinned as you went and slumped down in one of the empty chairs. Jake was grinning at you, “Fuck you too, Sully.”

But the stupid grin wouldn’t wipe off his face, “Hey, don’t get all pouty. At least you didn’t burn the kitchen again.”

You rolled your eyes, “Like you could do better.”

“Probably could. How would that make you feel?”

You tried to keep glaring at him, keep your scowling mask up. But the way he titled his head at you—you’ve grown to find it cute the past couple of months—or the simple way he looked at you made your resolve falter just a bit. These days, for some reason you couldn’t remain angry or annoyed with him. Not for long at least.

“I hate you.” You mumble out, fighting back a smile.

And there was his white smile again, “Or so you keep tellin’ me.”

Norm groaned, throwing his head back, “I hate you both.”

Grace turned back to face you all, “Breakfast is ready!”

Jake held your avatar close to him. Under the eyes of the spirits he blinked away tears.

“We won, Y/N,” He whispered, pulling your face into his chest as he continued whispering, “We won…”

END OF PART ONE

taglist: @luvvfromme @sully-stick-togetherr @jakesullylvr @s-u-t @ssc7514 @cheari @tojigirll @nyotamalfoy @perfectprofessorloverapricot @naityelen @dumb-fawkin-bitch @raggedyoldwitch @nhemmingsf @biooiuygjjgfsrb @thatsenoughformeloll @thotd-f11 @beaniebeensbaby201 @theoriginalwife000 @3leni @23victoria

#to you worlds away #avatar jake sully x reader #avatar jake #avatar jake sully #jake sully #jake sully x reader #avatar way of water #avatar 2 #avatar the way of water #atwow #tsu'tey #miles quaritch #neytiri #grace augustine #norm spellman

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octopotto · 1 year

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Yandere! Azul Ashengrotto General Headcanons

OCTO NOTE: Okay I know I said that I would work on the Cloud Strife hcs but then I got sad and thought about Azul lmaooo

Think of this as a celebration post for the live action The Little Mermaid release!! Has anyone seen it yet??

Warnings: NOT PROOF-READ, Yandere behaviour, manipulation, obsession, OOC madness, blackmail, insecurities, Jade and Floyd, this is a mess lmao I’m sorry.

**WILL CONTAIN SPOILERS FOR TWISTED WONDERLAND

REMINDER: Yandere behaviour of any kind is unhealthy behaviour. It should not be something to seek out in real life. If you are experiencing any sort of inappropriate behaviour, please contact help/seek out help.

**The reader will ALWAYS be Gender-Neutral!

ps. HAPPY PRIDE MONTH TO MY FELLOW LGBTQIA+ <3333

———————————-••———————————

- Azul can be described as a greedy, manipulative, and intelligent individual who uses logical reasoning and sometimes solid ‘evidence’ to succeed, whether it be his business or his education.

- At least on the outside.

- On the inside is an insecure, isolated, and paranoid little octopus that when cornered, just can’t help but slowly become unable to contain the facade he worked on for years.

- Now imagine this sad lil’ octopus as a yandere

- Not good lol

- I mean yes, the manipulative and intelligent nature of Azul are probably the main reasons as to why he’s one of the more terrifying yanderes in the TWST cast.

- But it’s because of him being very self-conscious of everything, as well as years of being isolated from his peers at a young age, Azul can be very much a clingy type as well. Especially to ones he cherishes the most.

- Which is unfortunately you! :D

- At first, Azul thought nothing of you

- Only seeing you as a pawn for his own selfish gain.

- But as Book 3 progressed and the on-going reports from the Leech twins, Azul can’t help but become curious of your character, dear prefect.

- Why do you care so much about those 3 fools? You haven’t even known them for a year and yet here you are! Sacrificing your well-being to save them.

- It sickens him.

- The thought of your selflessness makes him sick to his stomach.

- But despite that, he starts to think about you more.

- And begins to imagines

- What if he was the one you were going all out for?

- The one you were taking care of?

- The thought of that shell-shocked him for a bit.

- He shook it off and proceeded to his planning once more.

- Once everything ended with Azul’s overblot, you decided to personally talk to him.

- Telling him that you also went through some of the same issues that he had as well.

- Pointing out your flaws, outwards and inwards.

- It’s just you trying to show Azul that he wasn’t alone when it came to these problems. That’s he’s not the only one who’s worked so hard to cover up their past in order to move on.

- To say that Azul was shocked was an understatement.

- In fact he didn’t really say anything while you were talking to him.

- All he did was listen to you.

- And for the first time

- He felt that he wasn’t being made fun of or mocked.

- It was…comforting.

- Azul is clingy.

- Be it in his human form or his octopus form.

- During the museum scene in Book 3 (when the gang looked at the field trip photo), you couldn’t help but hug him after seeing lil’ smol and chubby Azul.

- He looked soo cute and cuddly!!

- Bby Azul!!

- He was in shocked

- He couldn’t move

- But didn’t try to leave your embrace.

- He just stood still.

- He didn’t understand

- For the first time in a while, he felt at peace.

- But at the same time, his heart was starting to beat uncontrollably and his breathing was becoming heavy.

- Ace was weirded out.

- Deuce had no idea what was going on .

- Grim was hungry.

- Jack wanted to leave.

- Floyd and Jade were snickering in the background while this unfolded

- Azul was fuming out of embarrassment when he heard them snicker.

- It was at this point where Azul fell in love with you.

- So ever since then, he secretly longs for your company.

- Walking beside you

- Asking if you’re in needs of favours that only he can fix for you

- If you give him a hug, that man will hold onto you for a while.

- He doesn't even realize it until you mention it to him.

- Even if you’re in the Monstro Lounge, as long as he knows you’re somewhere in the same vicinity as him, he’s at peace for a bit.

“Ah! D-dear Prefect! I didn’t even notice you’ve arrived at the lounge. W-well I know! I know that I wasn’t in the lounge when you came in, I was in my office working on our marriage contract— I mean—! Contacts for fellow peers who need some assistance. And— Floyd! Jade! I can hear your mocking from here! Stop it!”

- Speaking of Floyd and Jade,

- They very much enjoy having you around the lounge.

- Or just when you’re around in general.

- You provide so much entertainment for them, it’s amusing to watch.

- Especially if Azul is around.

- They haven’t seen Azul like that since he was a lil octopus.

- But, like Azul, they also grown fond of you.

- Not like that tho

- Like a sibling

- A lil Shrimpy for them to protect and play with!

- As they grow more fond of you, they start to see you as a pitiful and defenceless Shrimpy.

- Despite you saving them from Azul’s blot form but oh well—

- They have to protect you!!

- So don’t try to run away from them

- It’s pretty much useless at this point.

“Hey hey, Shirmpy~ Let’s play together!! You know it’s useless struggling! Especially since you’re soo puny~ *Giggles* C’mon! I promise that if you stay good, I’ll squeeze you less tight than usual~”

“Fu fu fu~ Floyd please be gentle. You don’t want to scare them more than they already are. Dear prefect, don't be alarmed. We simply want to spend a little quality time with you before Azul orders us to bring you to the lounge.”

******

- Despite Azul being a very cunning and manipulative individual, he’s also very self-conscious.

- Azul puts these precautions and restrictions on you because he’s scared that you’ll leave.

- He’s paranoid that you’ll just run off and find another person that’s better than him.

- He’s always been casted aside for almost all his life.

- That’s why he made sure to cover up all of his past self.

- He doesn’t want to be that ‘octo-twerp’ anymore.

- He doesn’t want you to think of him as that twerp he was years ago.

- He doesn’t want you, the person he loves so much, to see him like that.

- Even with all the reassurance from you.

- Believe it or not, Azul takes your opinions of him in high regards

- Meaning if he finds out about something you don’t like about him (beside the obvious problematic traits he has), he would make sure to change, if not conceal them, in order for you to stay happy with him.

- As long as you’re happy, he’s happy.

- He just doesn’t want you to leave him, is that so hard to ask for?

- So please just stay

- For the sake of his own being entirely.

- And if you don’t?

- Hoo boy—

- You thought Azul was bad during the 3rd book with his contracts?

- It’s gets worst

- Especially since it’s business mixed with love.

- Let’s get this outta the way, this man will search high and low for any flaw or problem you have.

- He’ll find anything and I mean anything.

- Whether it be you’re struggling with (school, education, etc) or something you did.

- If he can’t find worthy material, he’ll just make up something believable. Then will exaggerate that shit till you can't even defend yourself.

- He will find a way, he'll find something to use against you.

- And once he has all of the information he needs to trap help you, all he has to do is call in one (or both if you’re slippery lmao) of the tweel twins to ‘kindly escort’ you to his office!

- This is Azul we’re talking about. He’s always ready to lend a hand to a fellow peer in need.

- And it’s totally out of the kindness of his 3 pure and selfless hearts.

- What a saint.

- 🙄🙄🙄🙄🙄

- Whatever problem Azul decides to blackmail you with, the only way for him to solve it is for you is to give your unconditional love and devotion to him.

- He will also give you his love and devotion as well. But he didn’t say that out loud.

- At this point, you just have to give in.

- I mean, look at what could happen if Azul leaks out the blackmail material he’s using against you.

- You could possibly get kicked out of Night Raven.

- Where would you and Grim go? You’re not even from here! You don’t even have enough money saved up.

- Even if you could threaten Azul with fraudulence (if the accusations he presented were false), there’s nothing that Floyd and Jade can’t do when needing to silence someone.

- And both are glad to do so if you’re planning to leave them.

“My dear Prefect! Why are you looking so downcast? Is it because of what I said? Oh, don’t worry! If anything happens to you, it will be alright as long as you sign this contract I have provided before you. You don’t want to? Then hopefully you don’t mind Floyd and Jade kindly convincing you to do so? I promise you, prefect, you’ll be fine with me as long as you do what I say. My generosity and unconditional love holds no bounds when it comes to you.”

———————————-••———————————

OCTO NOTE: OKAY! This is probably the most out of character fic I’ve written so far. So please forgive me!! 😭😭😭

But I hope you enjoy this lil fic! I will be working on Cloud’s Headcanons now! <33

ALSO— THANK YOU ALL SM FOR 100+ HEARTS FOR BOTH SILVER FICS!!!! I PROMISE I'LL ALSO WRITE MORE FOR OUR SLEEPY BOY ❤️❤️❤️

#tw yandere #yandere twisted wonderland #yandere twst #yandere azul ashengrotto #yandere azul x reader #yandere imagines #yandere headcanons #male yandere #twisted wonderland imagines #yandere scenarios #yandere #twst imagines #twisted wonderland #azul twst #azul twisted wonderland #twst headcanons

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bsd-fan · 1 year

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Dazai osamu: Evolution

In a lot of ways this is where my Dazai analysis will really start, this is going to be insanely long so be prepared. It also has spoilers of the manga, anime, and most of the light novels.

I’ve talked about how is a mistake to measure Dazai’s character growth in terms of morality, because that has never been the main point of his characterization. Being a “good” or a “Bad” person is not as important as the fandom makes it to be. Dazai is unapologetically a morally grey character and he will always be. However, this doesn’t mean that Dazai hasn’t changed.

He has and it goes far beyond him changing into a boring trench coat and calling himself a detective. He has changed so fundamentally speaking that I’d go and say that right now is the most developed character in this area and the thing that make this even more surprising is that his character growth has not finished yet. He keeps evolving.

To understand this let’s start analyzing him chronologically:

Fifteen year old Dazai is probably the lowest we’ve ever seen Dazai. Starting fifteen, Dazai is showed to us as someone who genuinely wants to die, he is /not/ attempting suicide as a joke, is not a comedic relief. Fifteen year old Dazai wants to die with a desperation that borders on madness. He is so tired of living, so bored of life and the people that surround him, about how predictable they are, about how easy is to manipulate them, there’s not a thing in this world that can surprise him, he is living in this permanent state of numbness. He is completely lonely in a world that will never be able to understand him. And let me make a pause to talk about the fact that it has been /heavily/ implied that Dazai was living in this situation for a long time. People loves to blame Mori for Dazai’s personality but this is simply and canonically speaking not true.

Dazai has already formed most of his worse personality traits by the time Mori found him. Let me remind you that they met when Mori saved Dazai’s life /after/ he attempted suicide at fourteen. Fandom loves to act as Dazai was a perfectly healthy kid that Mori ruined when that’s not true. Mori made it worse, yes. But he wasn’t the cause of it.

“Miscalculation.

You misjudged the situation, he told himself. You failed to pick the optimal solution. You shouldn’t have chosen this child to help you. Dazai is unpredictable. He can be sharp but in a dark, twisted way. He’s observant. He’s cold and calculating with no equivalent even in the mafia, where the most evil reside”- Mori about Dazai, ligh novel fifteen.

I will talk about this more depth in another essay about Soukoku and the mafia but this is important to aknowledge. Dazai was like this even /before/ Mori’s influence, Mori was scared of him even when Dazai was just a child because he saw how deeply disconnected from his humanity he was. How cruel, cold and calculating he could be.

So going back to the main idea, at this point of the story, Dazai is already numb, manipulative, and machiavellian, he doesn’t trust in anyone and his only real connection is with Mori that looks at him like a convenient weapon to wield. But the most important trait of Dazai at this age? Is how deeply apathetic Dazai is to everything. At this stage of life Dazai lives in a pure nihilism, he doesn’t believe in /anything/, he conceives life as completely meaningless, he doesn’t see a point in existing when there’s no a reason for it. It’s so bad that it’s funny. Mori knows about the /raw/ potential in Dazai, about how valuable he can be as a tool but he can’t use him because Dazai is so unmotivated that he simply doesn’t give a damn about anything. He is a genius and he only uses his intellect to try to kill himself. He can’t be bothered with anything else, even breathing is an annoying task and a waste of effort and then…this happens:

I’m not pointing this out as a soukoku shipper because this is not even a soukoku analysis, this is all about Dazai. People will always talk about Fifteen importance for chuuya, but fifteen was also fundamental in Dazai’s arc.

Cold and apathetic Dazai was literally kicked in the face by his biggest narrative foil. Chuuya who is loud, and ridiculously emotional, who can’t for the life of him hide his expressions, who is a terrible liar, impulsive, pathologically loyal to the point of idiocy, and so fucking full of vitality, so hungry for life. And so /unbearable human/. And then Dazai gets annoyed, and surprised, and out of nowhere he is screaming at the top of his lungs, showing /emotion/, he is curious, he is intrigued. He went from saying that breathing is such a hassle to fucking throwing a party and singing happily while he, in person, decorates, he even got a cake for fuck’s sake.

He doesn’t understand chuuya, he is curious about the sheep dynamics and as the story progresses we realize that this is probably the first time that Dazai fucks up, he failed to predict a situation, he didn’t saw it coming.

He wasn’t able to realize that Chuuya was Arahabaki, he didn’t even thought about that possibility. Because since the first moment, he never thought that chuuya could be something else than human. He didn’t saw Rimbaud coming because the idea of a person going that far for someone else? Is ridiculous, it doesn’t make sense, is illogical. It’s not how people are supposed to act.

“-So it’s all for your partner-Dazai said listlessly- Betraying the mafia, spreading rumors about the old boss’s resurrection, this fight we’re in now…it’s kind of hard to believe, to be honest

-Maybe for a slimeball like you it is- Chuuya scoffed. He looked up at Randou- Throwing everything away for your friends is a perfectly respectable reason to risk your life if you ask me”- Dazai and chuuya, fifteen years old. (Pause to scream about how much I love chuuya, help)

So basically every thing that happened in fifteen leads to this:

And this guys, is one of the angular stones in Dazai’s development.

“The boy’s eyes were as clear as the sky on a sunny day; they lacked any shred of trepidation. This was not something earned, for only those determined to live could possess their heavenly blue sparkle”- about Dazai, fifteen.

This is the /only/ moment in the entirety of the series where Dazai not only doesn’t want to die, but that he /actively/ is looking towards life. The only moment in all bsd, Dazai is excited at the perspective of living. Fifteen is so important because this is the first time, Dazai’s view of life is challenged. Dazai was wrong. He made mistakes. People are not as predictable and boring as he thought. Dazai doesn’t suddenly start thinking that life has meaning, but he starts thinking that it /may/ exist, he just hasn’t found it yet.

This scene makes a radical switch in Dazai’s character because his primary goal changed from wanting to die to finding a reason to live.

In fifteen Dazai found hope, and everything that came after is possible because of this.

And it’s logical to an extent. He doesn’t understand life, but maybe if he understands death he can come closer to understand it. People always lie but when they are about to die? People become genuine, pretensions disappear, what do you cling to when you don’t have anything? When you’re dying, why do you keep fighting? If he can understand this, then maybe he can understand the sense in life. Maybe he can connect with his own desires and emotions. Maybe he can find his own reason to exist.

Unfortunately this doesn’t last.

By stormbringer, Dazai falls into despair once again, he goes back to looking for his death.

“Dazai glanced back at him, perhaps amused by this, then he muttered as if he was talking to himself. -I couldn’t find anything in the end’- Dazai osamu, stormbringer

“It seems true that he wants to die. It seems that all the value standards of living reflected in his eyes are just as worthless and ugly as scrap iron”- Oda about Dazai, The day I picked up Dazai osamu side A, translated by poppopretty

For a long time, I thought that was the culmination of Dazai’s development as a character. He went from wanting to die to trying to find a reason to live, he struggles but he is trying.

I was wrong.

Chuuya solves his main conflict in stormbringer, Dazai doesn’t. To understand this, we need to understand that one the main themes in Bungou stray dogs is existentialism.

In simple (extremely simple) words existentialism can be defined as: “ the philosophical belief we are each responsible for creating purpose or meaning in our own lives”. Which means that in a way existentialism also understands that life can be meaningless, that maybe there’s not a big purpose in existence BUT that doesn’t have to mean that it has to stay that way. Existentialism defends that people can find their own purpose and maybe is not something big, it may be not life changing for others, but is something people cling to and that’s enough to give sense to the world. I will be talking more in depth about this in chuuya’s analysis but right now the important thing is to understand that this is not enough for Dazai.

He /needs/ a bigger purpose, a better answer, something objective and logical, something that can’t be debated. Because if it’s not, then Dazai’s genius mind will pick on that and he will once again be drown in desperation. Dazai needs an absolute answer.

Enter oda, the catalyst of Dazai’s next biggest arc as a character. But first let’s understand sixteen year old Dazai’s perspective of live, shall we?

“- you said it is foolish to die, right? So here is my question. If dying is foolish, then why do we have to die?

(…)

-So, you mean life is not something to regret?

-No, it is worse than that. Even though we are all promised death, from the beginning, all human beings were born with a present desire called “I don’t want to die”. This is also one hundred percent true. That is why, that desire will never be fulfilled”- The day I picked up Dazai Osamu, transplanted by poppypretty

So, to summarize Dazai can’t understand what’s the point in living if by the end there’s no real point in it. There’s nothing there, there’s not a reason to suffer so much because that’s what he is doing. He is suffering. He is all alone, feeling like an alien in a world of humans, just using a mask and trying to hide how really inhuman and empty he is behind all of that and for what? The world is senseless. Worse than that, there are not a lot of things he cares about but when he finds something worth preserving, he loses it. Dazai is in a horrible situation because his intelligence alienates him and isolates him from other people but it’s not enough to win against the senseless of life. He lives at edge, trying to predict and control everything to protect himself and the things important to him, he purposefully goes along with the alienation and isolates himself more thus going farther from his humanity, and at the end is worthless. Because it doesn’t matter how intelligent he is, is still not enough, he will never be able to control everything, he will never be able to predict everything with 100% of accuracy because life doesn’t work in that way, is all about chaos. And Dazai can’t deal with that.

Time passes, by eighteen years old, Dazai in a lot of ways gets worse. He is the “Demon prodigy” destructive, cruel, a master in torture and his mental state continues to get worse and worse but funnily enough he is still standing and that’s thanks to two things:

1) the hope he found at fifteen and never let him. Yes, Dazai goes back to wanting to die because life sometimes becomes unbearable but his goal is still to find a reason to live. And that didn’t changed.

2) his friends. Odasaku, Ango and Lupin bar are important things for Dazai. He is still lonely but it’s a little better

Then everything goes to shit.

But I want you to understand this. After Oda decides to die, Dazai tries to stop him and this is what he says:

“-Find something to rely on. Expect good things to happen from here on out. There’s gotta be something…Hey Odasaku, do you know why I joined the mafia? (…) I joined the mafia because of an expectation I had. I thought if I was close to death and violence-close to people giving in to their urges and desires, then I would be able to see the inner nature of humankind up close. I thought if I did that…I would be able to find something-a reason to live”- Dazai Osamu, Dark era.

This is frankly tragic, because just as I said in previous analysis. Dazai’s worse trait, the real cause of all his suffering is his complete lack of self awareness. His main problem is not his lack of understanding of life, is the lack of understanding of himself. He thinks that understanding human at their most basic, desperate state will make him understand better humankind and that ultimately will make him closer to his humanity. But that’s not how it works. He can’t just watch from afar and expect that to be enough. Dazai needs to connect with himself, even the worse parts of himself, even the parts he doesn’t want to see instead of covering them up, he needs to let himself bond with other people, he needs to connect with his own emotions and desires. He needs to leave his overly complex ideas behind, to go down from the high horse he is in, to stop with the omniscient being act that aggravate his isolation and alienation, the things that ultimately make him perceive himself as something inhuman. He needs to accept that at the end of the day he is just human, just like the rest of the world and he is just as powerless as them.

Now let’s go to arguably Dazai’s most important scene as a character: Odasaku’s death

People love to make this scene about soukoku and it’s fucking ridiculous.

People will take this scene and put it as evidence for the “Chuuya’s always the second choice” theory that they came up with (even if the whole theory is fucking ) but specifically this? Dazai leaving the mafia? Has nothing to do with chuuya. It’s part of his /individual/ character development and exactly what it should be.

Let’s start analyzing it

Dazai arrives and Oda is dying, he is desperate to save him even when he know is too late and the Odasaku says something. And this, this guys is what ultimately leads to Dazai’s character growth.

“-you told me if you put yourself in a world of violence and bloodshed, you might be able to find a reason to live (…) you won’t find it-Odasaku said in an almost whisper. Dazai stared at him- You should know that. Whether you’re on the side that takes lives or the side that saves them, nothing beyond your own expectations will happen. Nothing in this world can fill the hole that is your loneliness. You will wander the darkness for eternity”

“ That was when Dazai first realized: Sakunosuke oda understood him much more than he’d ever imagined- right up to his very heart, almost to the center of his mind. Dazai didn’t realize until then that someone had known him so well. For the first time in his life, Dazai wanted from the bottom oh his heart to know something. He asked the man before him:

-Odasaku, What should I do-“- Odasaku and Dazai osamu, Dark era

This is the most important scene for Dazai. He has always been lonely, he has always lived with the knowledge that it doesn’t matter how much he tries, no one will ever able to understand him but then just minutes before oda’s death he realizes he was wrong. To say that he left the mafia for oda is as inexact as saying that he decided to live for chuuya. It’s simply not true. He was heavily influenced by both of them but at the end of the day it was for himself.

“People live to save themselves”

I’ve say it before but this sentence is the core of bsd. If you want to analyze a character in this series, not matter who, you need to start by this quote. Dazai is not the exception to it.

He joined the mafia trying to find his own salvation, to get closer to his humanity, to find his reason for living, to find answers and he left because he realized it was useless. He always knew in a way, but he couldn’t bring himself to leave because this was his only chance, the mafia was his only hope, was the only thing he was clinging to. Even in his worst moments, Dazai still clung to the idea that he would find what he was looking for. But then, while dying oda talks to him and he realizes that there was someone who understood. Someone who knew about his pain, someone who understood his desperation, someone who looked through the mask and realized how utterly broken he was. And thing is, he failed, he tried the logical option and he found nothing but then maybe oda, oda who knows him best, oda who probably understands him better that he understand himself can tell him what to do. That’s why Dazai is so desperate in this scene, asking what to do. Because this is a new chance, there’s new hope. What Oda said might sound horrible but it was exactly what Dazai needed to hear and is the reason I was wrong.

Dazai doesn’t read as a character who went from wanting to die to wanting to find a reason to live.

Because to begin with, what Dazai was looking for was completely unreachable because it doesn’t exist. He can be looking for a reason to live all his life and he won’t find it because there’s not an absolute answer. There is not a bigger motive. The world really is senseless, that’s how it is. And Dazai needed to understand that. That’s why oda tells him to forget all about that silly hope. Because is useless.

“Be on the side that saves people. If both sides are the same, then choose to become a good person. Save the weak, protect the orphaned. You might not see a great difference between right and wrong, but…saving others is something just a bit more wonderful”- Oda Sakunosuke, dark era.

But that doesn’t mean than living is worthless

And this is how we come to Dazai’s real change as character. Dazai goes from nihilism, to a failed attempt of existentialism to absurdism.

Absurdism is the philosophical theory that existence in general is absurd, meaning that the world lacks meaning or a higher purpose. It also refers to the discrepancy between two things such as: the conflict as a colission between a rational man in an irrational world. In simple words, absurdism refers to the struggle of the man to find sense in a senseless world and we can see the mental impact of this struggle in the form of existential crises (yes, just like Dazai) Okay so I swear this made perfect sense in my own language, I’m gonna try as best as I can to explain it in English. Absurdism is different from existentialism because it doesn’t think that you can find a sense in the world, it really defends that not matter what you do, you will never find anything, that it doesn’t matter what you cling to in the great scheme of things it still means nothing, and in a way this need to find a sense in life will lead to more chaos BUT it also defends that you have to keep living despite that, maybe out of pure spite of it. Things doesn’t need to make sense to be worthy.

Absurdism says that there are three options to deal with this problem

Suicide: the pure desperation of trying to reach something that doesn’t exist will lead to the rejection of life. But this is not the correct answer (Cough, young Dazai, cough)

Religion: trying to cope, clinging to the idea that there’s a higher purpose. (Cough, Fyodor, Cough)

Rebellion against the absurd: which is the right answer, the individual needs to learn to accept the absurdity of the world and of his own existence but keep opposing to it. Which means, that the individual keeps living clinging to little things that may not have sense, but that are still worthy and valuable. In even simpler terms, absurdism says “do what you have to do to stop from killing yourself, not matter how stupid that thing is”

Cadmus explained it even better using this example:

You all know about Sisyphus, right? If not is basically this man that was punished by the gods. The punishment consisted of rolling a massive rock up a hill, but it doesn’t matter how hard he tried, at the end of the day, once the rock reached the top it would roll down again. So it was a completely senseless punishment. Not matter how Sisyphus tried he could never win against the absurdity of it. And this also happens with human lives, we do meaningless things all the time, knowing that at the end we will die. Not matter what we do, if we end up as vagabonds or if we find the cure against cancer, the result is still the same, we will all die, so everything we do in life is pointless. BUT Cadmus said that you still can’t give up. Because at the end, sisyphus needs to stop caring about something that he can’t change, the result will always be the same but the important thing is the instant of happiness when he comes close to finishing his job. The moment when the rock reaches the top? seconds before it rolls down, that satisfaction? Is what life is really about. And that’s exactly what Dazai is trying to do right now.

He won’t find sense in life, but being in the ADA is a little more beautiful and that alone is reason enough to be there. Maybe he is not a good person, maybe he doesn’t understand morals but he is with people he has come to appreciate in a better environment doing something that he enjoys more and that’s enough.

There’s this omake in bsd that shows a conversation between Atsushi and Dazai. And Atsushi asks Dazai, why he is in the ADA because someone as intelligent as Dazai can surely find a job with better pay, and Dazai looks at him and tell him that it’s true, but he is fine where he is because he likes to use his brain to help people. That guys, is absurdism right there, Dazai acknowledges that it may not makes sense but he likes what he does and that’s enough.

This change has been gradual and Dazai still struggles with it. He still has problems with the idea of letting things go, he still is a manipulative bastard and that will never change, because at this point is just a part of his personality, he still is trying to control everything but at the same time he also is ready to accept that sometime you just don’t have the answers and that’s part of humanity. This is one of my favorite panels on earth:

Dazai is trying to convince kyouka of living, to choose to do something different from the things she’s good at, if that what makes her happy. This is one of the few scenes Dazai accepts that he is not omniscient, that there are no answers for all the questions, and that we are all a little lost because of it. This is also the first time Dazai is not in desperation while saying it. His growth is not about becoming a good person, he still does horrible things, but that doesn’t mean he hasn’t changed. To accept that life is senseless but it still is worthy, to accept that he can’t control everything but the possibilities of it are not necessarily something to be afraid but opportunities? /That’s/ his character growth

This whole arc is a masterpiece because it highlights Dazai’s growth. He is against Fyodor, who in a lot of ways is just like him but at their core they are completely different.

This hands down is my favorite Dazai’s panel because is all about his growth. Because he can see what Fyodor doesn’t. Fyodor see himself as a god, Dazai doesn’t because he knows that it doesn’t matter if they are pulling the strings, they are still isolated and alienated from everything, the people that really is moving the world is the one out there, the people that jumps even when they don’t know if they will be caught. The people that don’t know half of what they know but still are able to move in the middle of the uncertainty. And that’s something that neither Fyodor nor Dazai are able to do. But Dazai is no longer in pain because of that, he now understands the problem and is trying his best to overcome it. Dazai stopped resenting the world for being senseless and illogical and is learning to accept it and just adapt as best as he can to it. To give everything for the people he cares about even when there’s no guarantee that it will end well, but Dazai is trying and that’s what matters.

I really wish I had the time to make a better analysis but I don’t. Even then, I wanted to share my pure love and admiration to this character. Dazai is so beautifully written and by far the most complex character in this whole story, all of his development as a character is simply fascinating and the way Asagiri is writing him right now has me screaming and running in circles.

#bsd #bungou stray dogs #dazai bsd #dazai osamu #soukoku #skk #dazai analysis #bsd spoilers #this is annoyingly long

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deathmetalunicorn1 · 10 months

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Good evening my favorite author! I hope you enjoyed your vacation. I can't wait to request this for a long time hahahaha!! Can you make another part of lost and found love but the characters are qin shi huang and apollo. I dont know if you can right for hermes but you can please include him.

-He could still remember that terrible day as if it was only moments ago.

-The day you were taken from him, dying to protect another.

-He remembers screaming your name, watching your body crumple to the ground with a dull thud, you had died instantly.

-He didn’t even get a chance to say goodbye.

-So much time had passed since he last saw you, held you, there was not a day that passed where he didn’t remember your smile.

-When he was selected to fight next in Ragnarok, he was informed that his opponent changed at the last moment, which confused him as he walked out first, listening to both the cheers and the jeers from either side.

-The last person he was expecting to see was you, wearing a long flowing white gown with golden armor adorning your features, holding a matching sword and shield.

-Qin Shi Huang- His eyes grew wide, he didn’t want to believe them, thinking this was a trick, yes a trick of the gods, like Loki, whom he had seen change into other people. However, he couldn’t move, seeing you smiling over at him, seeing you looked just as beautiful as the day he lost you. He felt like he couldn’t breathe, couldn’t swallow, couldn’t speak, watching your gown swirl around you angelically. Your sword and shield lowered as you smiled across the field, seeing his shock, “Zheng~” he immediately ran for you, as only a small handful of people knew his real name, with you being one of them and the crowds roared with cheers as his hands met your waist, spinning you around above his head before pulling you into his arms. It was really you, there was no faking your warmth, your embrace as he took in a shuddering breath, “It’s really you!” you smiled softly, your hand coming to scratch at the back of his neck, his favorite spot as he melted into your embrace. As he pulled back, his hands cupped your face, “How- how did…” he still couldn’t form words as you pulled him down into a soft kiss, making him smile and hum into the kiss as you explained that you had been reincarnated on earth, then ascended to become a goddess after you died when he lost you saving another. He swept you into his arms, telling someone else to get your weapons as he hugged you closely, not willing to let you go for anything at the moment.

-Apollo- It was a trick- it had to be, there was no way that you were really there! Your flowing dress, your bright E/C eyes, the soft, gentle smile on your lips, one that shook him to the core, seeing one of the few beings that he truly loved. His mind couldn’t comprehend how you were there now, or how you were a human of all things, but it was really you as you closed your eyes, your head tilting just slightly to the right as you beamed at him, just like always. The nymphs and other women who adored Apollo were quickly lamenting their loss, as he had turned to them all in heartbreak, trying to drown his feelings of loss and anguish. Seeing you there, they now knew that they had lost their darling Apollo as he walked towards you. Your weapons lowered before falling out of your hands as you did the same, walking until you were right before him. His eyes were wide, mouth slightly open as he couldn’t find his words as you smiled, reaching up to cup his cheeks, “I’m home~” he hugged you tightly as the crowds went wild, seeing the reunion, as many knew that you could keep Apollo under control. You smiled softly as he embraced you tightly, squeezing you before he pulled back and kissed you deeply, making one of your feet pop up from the passion. He was stunned, once back in his waiting room, to learn you had been reincarnated as a human and lived and died as you did in Valhalla, a hero, which is why you ascended, and you told Brunnhilde you were going to fight in Ragnarok so you could see him. He smiled warmly, hugging you close, “And you’re home in my arms- where you belong.” You smiled, cuddling up to him, the two of you basking in the happy glow.

-Hermes- He couldn’t help but immediately gawk, flinching back as he saw you there, looking as beautiful as the day he lost you. Hermes wasn’t one of the original fighters planned to fight, so when Zeus told him he was fighting next, there wasn’t much he could do. However, seeing you there, realized that he had been set up, looking up at Zeus who was with Brunnhilde, just for a moment for the reunion, the two of them smiling down at him as Hermes turned back to you. His breathing was harsher, more excited as your weapons fell and the two of you ran to each other as the crowds went wild. Many knew of your sacrifice so long ago, choosing to die to save a child, as many, humans and gods both, mourned your death, but no one more than your lover, Hermes, who locked himself away for years, refusing to interact with anyone, mourning your death. He only came out after having the realization that you would have kicked his ass for moping for so long. As Hermes hugged you close, feeling like it was really you, he sagged against you, “It’s you- it’s really you!” you smiled, cupping his cheeks as the tears welled in his eyes, easily falling and you pulled him down, kissing him softly, “I’m home Hermes!” he grinned, hugging you again before sweeping you into his arms princess style, flirting with you that he was going to make up for lost time and drown you in kisses. Between his kisses, Hermes learned that you had been reincarnated as a human warrior and fought for others, which is what brought you to Valhalla, and Brunnhilde and Zeus were both in agreement to surprise Hermes with your return, something he kissed you more for. Hermes was elated to finally have you back where you belonged, in his arms.

#record of ragnarok #ror x reader #ror qin shi huang #ror apollo #ror hermes

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echantedtoon · 5 months

Text

In The Moon's Shadow (Yandere Kokushibo x Reader) Ch1 Promise

A few things to know before reading this story.

1. This is a Yandere-ish story. I in NO way support any of that kind of relationship in real life!

2. This is a story with Demons from Demon Slayer so expect there to be some fighting, cussing, blood, mentioned killing, and other such things. Although they WILL be way toned down.

3. Kokushibo isn't going to be much of a yandere and more of having no idea how human relationships work but that's because Im not used to writing full blown yanderes. So the relationship will be non-toxic.

4. This IS an AU. So barely anything will be cannon.

5. If any chapters have warnings please read and heed them.

Thank you for reading.

Y/n is lucky to have such a simple life in a world where humans and demons lived side by side and tension was always present. She always told herself she was lucky to never have any big attention. Until she's caught in trouble's shadow. Unfortunately once trouble tastes a peaceful life it wants nothing more than to sink itself into that peace

The embodiment of darkness was enticing to say the least. Especially with herself entangled within his grip. It felt…

c o l d.

So cold, so frightening. Yet so familiar. The blood ran cold. Eyes deeply staring through the soul wriggling, squirming in its hold. White teeth gleaming beside the eyes in a smile that was not threatening nor welcoming. It was just…there. There for her, the one caught up into the grip of the night. the only thing they could do for them was finish them off — even if it was they who would have to suffer then.

“I know that I’m not allowed to, and that you’ll be filled with disgust towards me, so I didn’t tell you that I loved you… Until the end."

Lines were blurring. Obsession with love. Madness within clarity. Starvation of touch with longing of burning loneliness. Passion and poison. Breaths were warm despite his cold body. Eyes soft despite their own desire filled look. Grip firm but restrained so much it hurts him how cautious he was being to not harm. Her soft skin burnt him! It burnt, it burnt-

It lit up his soul with unresolved longing he was never able to fulfill like this with anything else in his life.

"You came back. ...Why?"

"Ah yes. I remember the day I died. You may ask what I'm still doing here in nothing but my bleeding heart. It's a promise I made to a dear friend and even if that friend doesn't remember that promise I will go to her and apologize."

Whispered murmurs against lips. Close as lovers could ever be. Arms around each other's bodies like a whirlwind would pull them away. Eyes closing with one last murmur against her lips.

"Why apologize? It's simple really....Death is never an apology."

#yandere kokushibo x reader #kokushibo x reader #yandere kokushibo #kokushibou #kokushibo #michikatsu x reader #demon slayer michikatsu #kny michikatsu #demon slayer #Kny #kny yoriichi #kimetsu gakuen #kimetsu no yaiba #In The Moon's Shadow #kny kokushibo #yandere kokushibou

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spicysourchimken · 4 days

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So with the DP x DC “Corpses AU” thing, what type of worldbuilding about his corpses do you mean? Like, is it about how he deals with his numerous corpses or about the “why” of the many-corpse situation? I’m curious about both

Also, how long did it take for his parents to find out in this AU (assuming they have)? I feel like the corpses would make things kinda hard to hide, but idk

Oh I'm so glad you asked. The answer is Yes.

Why and How on the Corpses

Danny's corpse is the universe leveling itself out. Its the universe manifesting a counter balance to Danny's death, he's still alive, his heart still beats and he breaths and as Danny that's fine, he's able to tap into his more ghostly side freely while still breathing, still sleeping, functioning as a living person but a little bit off.

But as a ghost there's nothing to keep him human, bada bing bada boom corpse. It's acting as a tether or an anchor, its the thing keeping him stable. The more he transforms the more need there is for the corpses.

But there's also an upper limit on the corpses. Because as much as they are real, they were at one point humans- but they're also the universe fucking around with an anomaly. Normally it taps out at around 10 or 12 corpses, once Danny exceeds the Corpse Limit, the bodies spark and disintegrate (mimicking Danny's death via electrocution)

Also there are two main ways for Danny to get corpsed, either willingly but going ghost and dropping another body or by his human body getting too hurt or verging death where he forcefully gets kicked out. Danny is stuck in a state of liminality, he can't be more dead or more alive so he's gotta even out before he can go back to either form (meaning that Danny can also be forcefully turned into a human when his ghost form is beat to hell and back)

Reveal and Dealing With Corpses

His parents very much did find out and it did not go well. It's very in line with the thinking of 'Phantom is a ghost possessing the body of our son' taken to the absolute extreme. It. Genuinely took longer than Danny thought it would've, he did manage to finish high school or get a good way into 12th grade before he was caught.

Sam, Danny and Tucker upon first corpsing, did what normal teens did and panicked. Then Sam took over, eventually settle on using the old drums that the Fenton parents used to primarily store chemicals, it evolved as Danny needed to transform in different parts of Amity Park so they assigned dump sites for Danny to transform in so that Sam and Tucker could get there and take care of it, or so that Danny would know where to drag his own remains.

His parents found out by witnessing Phantom attempt to hide his own corpse, it went as well as can be expected.

In Gotham Danny is far more sloppy that he was in Amity Park, with his main way of dealing with it being Don't Die or Transform. Problem solved. If he has to actually deal with a body he makes sure its out of site and that at least his hands are frozen down so that nobody makes an attempt to move him before he's got a dump site prepared. He tends to prefer not to deal with the logistics of water burials but dumping them in the river is the best he's got at the moment the au takes place in, too bad the bats are faster than he is.

#Murder! Murder! Murder! au #tw corpses #tw death #tw corpse

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eddiediazismyhusband · 13 days

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It was an interview full of "right now" and "at this moment" from both Ryan and Tim. I'm genuinely wondering why the freak out from everyone? Interviews are always, ALWAYS, answered and arranged for the current episode/arc. People do know that right? No one, even the PR dorks that are Oliver and Ryan, are ever going to say "so yeah, Eddie is going to propose to his girlfriend but have a near death experience near the season finale that will change everything and he will shout his love for Buck." That interview is literally never going to happen. And honestly him proposing makes a ton of sense from a story standpoint. It's technically everything he claims he wants, so how does Eddie react when things still don't feel right? If the storyline is headed toward a relationship with Buck, and it genuinely does feel like that, Eddie seemingly getting everything he's ever wanted and still feeling off is the perfect introduction to that. I'm stupidly stunned every time by the unhinged break downs after every fucking interview.

To be fair, anxiety is a very real issue for a lot of people (me being one of them, it doesn’t take much to send me spiraling) and in fact i am a catastrophizer… i see something and immediately jump to the worst conclusions about it and only then do i sit back and put thought into it.

I don’t like to post when i’m catastrophizing because all it does is stirs even more panic and anxiety, but others find it easier to post their panic/spiraling so that hopefully others may he able to offer a different point of view to talk them down from their panic. mental health is one bicth of a human condition.

so while yes, it is definitely jarring to see people panicking, i try to remain gracious to those who are spiraling because i understand the panic that sets in and the urgency for someone to tell you that everything is okay.

as far as knowing the ins and outs of how television and pr works; unfortunately a lot of people are not educated on how things like this go because we live in an age where weekly episodic releases like this are becoming less and less common as binge culture has become the hot commodity, especially for streaming services. with that there comes a level of misunderstanding of how the industry works and has worked in the past, especially for a younger audience. so a lot of viewers are used to having the whole story handed to them all at once, rather than the intensive speculation and uncertainty that comes with network tv.

i myself having worked in film and theatre have firsthand experience with PR and the media and how to keep things under wraps (i am by NO WAY an insider, i have worked on student/college/indie films and have had zero involvement in the commercial film industry) and i STILL sometimes struggle from that initial shock of reading something that seemingly doesn’t bode well for what you want to see from a television show.

so all of that to say is i understand it can be jarring and at times even annoying to see the catastrophizing and spiraling, but it helps me to step back and take a breath to remind myself to give some grace to people who may not have as much of an understanding of how things like this work as i do.

thank you for the ask anon!! Apologies for the long reply, i just wanted to discuss this bc i have a lot of my own thoughts on it! 💕

#911 abc #911 on abc #eddie diaz #buddie #911 spoilers #evan buckley #911 #buddie 911 #buck and eddie #911 season 7 #evan buck buckely

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missusmiller · 1 year

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my warrior // n.s x gn! human reader

pairing: neteyam x gn! human reader

contains: blood, cheating scene, fight scene, lots of aggression from reader, fluff, neteyam being awesome n sweet, angst if you squint and turn your head at a 75° angle then do a backflip, reader being scared of being seen, shitty writing

3.2k words

@marsconer @blueingsfairy @joalslibrary

notes: i just watched the movie and i didn’t know how the scientist compounds work exactly so lets pretend theres one in the hallelujah mountains and one on the ground a little far away from the first compound. reader lived on the one on the ground. also for plot convenience, reader was blessed by eywa as a baby to be able to breathe pandora air. she gave u na’vi lungs in the womb n shit bc ur parents loved her so much😻😻😻😻. yes. that makes sense yes.

summary/prompt: “i see you.”

“close your eyes then.”

________

“Are you fucking for real?”

Your latest boyfriend, Ian, and a girl you knew as Jasmine snapped their heads towards your menacing presence in the doorway. The looks on their faces showed pure horror as they could basically feel the anger dripping out of every pore in your body. You had just caught them tonguing eachother down in the large cleaning supply closet in the compound that all humans on Pandora lived in.

“I’m sorry, Y/N! I’m really sorry! You know I love you!” Ian sobbed out, knowing that all attempts to make excuses were futile with you.

His apologies meant nothing. You grabbed the nearest thing to you, which happened to be an empty mop bucket, and slammed it against his head with as much force as you could muster. If he wants to cheat, he can get beat the fuck up. Simply how it works.

Ian plunged to the ground with a yelp of pain. Taking this opportunity, you got on top of him and started delivering strikes after strikes to his once pretty face. Since you were stronger than him, Ian had no chance of getting out of the position you had him in. His cries for help echoed through the supply closet.

Jasmine begged you to stop, insisting that it was her fault and not his. In all honesty you didn’t blame her completely since it was Ian’s choice to cheat but god was her voice getting annoying.

It wasn’t until she grabbed your hair, pulling you off of Ian, that you actually touched her.

Hair pulling was foul so if she wanted to fight dirty, so could you.

You grabbed her admittedly beautiful hair and used it as a rope to slam her repeatedly against the one empty wall in the room.

But suddenly, multiple hands ripped you away from her. Many panicked voices surrounded the scene and before you knew it, you were told you had to have your shit packed to get sent away on an ikran to live with the Omaticaya people in a few days until further notice. The scientists told you it was just a temporary arrangement for you to learn morals and self control.

Then almost a week later, you were gone from the compound.

Not all was lost, though. It hadn’t been like you were totally new to the Na’vi people. Jake used to come around the compound with his children and they’d play with the human kids. You had been especially close to the eldest of the Sully kids. Y’all were like two peas in a pod. At least until age restricted the freedom to spend time together as you two got older and responsibilities became heavier.

In all honesty, you missed your friend. Which was mostly the reason why your heart felt like it was about to leap out of your chest in excitement and nervousness when the ikran landed on the edge of one of the mountains that had been home to many Na’vi and other scientists. The other reason for your anxiety was the amount of curious and cautious eyes on you.

Inak, your ikran uber driver, slid off of the large animal and helped you get down. He was a Na’vi man so it took no effort to pick you up and plop you on the ground. Jake greeted you and Inak and they conversed in Na’vi but you didn’t know enough words to fully understand.

While they talked, you truly took in your surroundings. The sky within your fingertips and the beautiful colors everywhere just took your breath away. In the compound, you didn’t see the mountains like this.

“Y/N, go with Jake now. I’ll see you in a bit, alright kiddo?” Inak said, rubbing your back for comfort with a comforting dorky smile smeared on his face. You nodded in understanding and with that he turned around and left. Inak was a pretty awesome dude. Scientist turned Na’vi through the consciousness transfer ritual.

Jake talked you through the tour of the home of the Omatikaya clan. You had trouble listening to everything he was saying because of the growing anxiety in your chest as you two came closer to a familiar group of rowdy kids.

“Kids! Look what the cat dragged in!” He exclaimed which got the attention of them all.

It took no time for you to have been almost tackled to the dirt by Tuktirey with her excitedly shouting, “It’s Y/N! Guys it’s my favorite human, they’re here! They’re here!”

She had gotten so much bigger since you last saw her which was around seven months ago. Too close to your height for sure.

You laughed heartily and embraced the girl back and said, “My wonderful Tuktuk! You’re so grown up now!”

Two more tall blue bodies joined the hug and your heart soared. Kiri and Lo’ak spat utter bullshit about who missed you more. There was nowhere to go in this group hug of death. But good death. Sure, you couldn’t breathe but these people are your loved ones so it sounds like a wonderful way to go out.

Suddenly, all three kids were tugged off of you and strong arms lifted you into an intense bear hug. Your legs dangled freely in the air due to the height difference.

“Neteyam.” You breathed, returning the hug with just as much vigor. He may have changed in the time you haven’t seen each other but you will forever recognize his hugs.

“I missed you, skxawng. Did you get a new best friend and forget about me?” He jokes as he puts you back on your feet.

You rolled your eyes, “Never. I hate everyone at that place. I’m actually here because I beat up my ex for cheating on me so the adults sent me here to learn restraint or whatever.”

His yellow eyes flickered over your face and body with an exasperated expression. The last time he saw you, you were timid and shy. You let people pick on you. Often times, Neteyam would have to come to your rescue. That person he was friends with was definitely not capable of having ‘ex’s let alone pummeling one to the point of your knuckles splitting.

Speaking of that, you definitely needed to get cleaned up and patched up.

“Let’s get your hands fixed up and you can tell me all about it, little warrior.” Neteyam insisted and I laughed before following him to his family’s home.

“She pulled your hair? What an ‘eveng. Can’t even fight properly.”

“Right? Then I grabbed her hair right back and slammed her head into the wall. Like girl, be so fucking for real.” You explained, using hand motions during your story with your hand that wasn’t being treated at the time. In your mind, it helped you get the point across.

Neteyam softly laughed at your antics. He never truly understood your human phrases or slang but he always saved them in the back of his mind to ask about later. The boy learned what ‘musty’ meant a while ago because of this.

The both of you told life stories of what had been going on during the time away from eachother. Neteyam had been growing into a mature boy more each time you saw him, mostly due to the overwhelming pressure of being the golden oldest child. Living up to Jake’s standards seemed absolutely impossible yet Neteyam did it. You on the other hand became tougher and rougher. Sadder as well. You dated around constantly and never seemed to be able to keep a relationship for more than a month. All this just to make yourself feel better. It was absolutely a downfall from your once beaming and sensitive self.

Neteyam couldn’t help but to blame himself yet again for your change. If he came around more, you wouldn’t have needed to toughen up to protect yourself from the fuckers at your ‘home.’

You crawled behind his sitting body, wrapping your legs around his waist and hugging his torso. Trying to comfort the boy, you said, “Teytey. Stop being emo bro because it’s not your fault. I couldn’t stay a little bitch forever you know? I just changed around them but I’m still the same person you knew only a few months ago. Just less…snotty and cry-y.”

His laugh vibrated through your body and you smiled against his back. “Cry-y isn’t even a word, Y/N.”

“It is now!” You said and swung your body around to tackle him to the ground. Then as you hovered over him, you took the liberty to give him a real nasty wet willy.

Neteyam gasped and cursed in shock and disgust before reaching his hands up your sides, tickling the sensitive skin.

You fell to the ground and laughed out profanities that were barely audible due to the lack of air in your lungs. Neteyam now loomed over you, continuing his attack. Your best friend only stopped when you declared him the winner of the squabble through breathless laughter.

He dropped next to you and you both laid in comfortable silence as you calmed down and wiped stray tears from your face.

The silence was quickly destroyed when the entire Sully family came into the home. You departed from Neteyam to talk to Kiri about the small insect in her hand that she was completely enraptured by.

“What is it?” You asked, laying your head on her shoulder comfortably to look at the fluorescent bug.

Kiri didn’t take her eyes off of it when she said, “I have no idea but look at it dance! It’s so cute.”

The bug was indeed dancing. It used the two back legs to lift it’s yellow rump in the air side to side.

You and Kiri laughed at the cute thing for a few more moments before she eventually let it go free.

It was coming to be about dinner time and whatever Neytiri was cooking smelled bomb as fuck. Neytiri never came around when Jake and the kids visited you. From your knowledge, she didn’t take to humans too fondly but you would never hold a grudge against her for that. If you were her you’d probably do the same.

Seeing her for the first time today was scary, though. She looked at you with this indescribable expression as you greeted her. When she did not greet you back, Lo’ak told you not to take it personally. You didn’t. You were more interested in how much Neteyam took after her. She was just so beautiful. The Sully family has some good genes for sure!

Once dinner was ready, Neteyam pulled you over to him. Basically not giving you a choice but to be next to him to eat. He slang a heavy arm over your shoulder to ensure any attempts to escape would not be successful. You rolled your eyes at his clinginess but secretly you adored it.

The family talked amongst eachother but you stayed silent, trying to ignore Neytiri’s eyes on you. The food was so damn good but you couldn’t even focus on it because it felt like she was trying to burn holes in your head with her eyes. Once you finished eating, you excused yourself and quickly walked out.

The air seemed fresher outside without the pressuring glare of their gorgeous mother. With your hands on your knees, you deeply inhaled and exhaled to try to calm your pounding heart.

Neteyam followed you out of the home, rubbing your back for comfort as you caught your breath. “She is intense but she doesn’t dislike you. She’s weary is all.”

You nodded in understanding which was all you could seem to do in the moment.

He paused his back rubbing sesh, thinking for a moment before saying, “Come on. I have something to show you.”

Like an obedient dog you followed him. Honestly, you’d follow him to the edge of the earth if he wanted you to but that’s besides the point.

Neteyam guided you to his ikran where he mounted the willing creature. A rush of excitement passed through you as you realized what was happening. He swooped you up by your waist and plopped you down behind him.

“I’ve been meaning to give you this for so long when I finally got my ikran but my duties got in the way. Here you go.” Neteyam said with a slightly sad tone as he reached into his side pouch and pulled out a small pair of flying glasses. They matched the ones that were sitting on top of his head.

You beamed with joy as you took them, thanking him a million times over. They fit perfectly.

For Neteyam, it felt like a dream. He was finally about to ride with you, something he’s dreamt about doing since the day that you two made it official that you were best friends. He loved you, truly. And now that you were finally within his grasp again he promised himself that he’d never let go no matter what his duties were or how busy he was.

Neteyam warned you to hold on tight before the ikran dipped down into the sky between the mountains. You gripped onto his waist like he was going to disappear in your arms. He noticed this and reached a hand back to grip onto your thigh to give you a better sense of security. The innocent act made electricity shoot up your spine. Your face burned despite the cool air whipping against it.

It’s not like you were stupid, though. Your intense crush on your best friend has lasted for years so no doubt his touch made you react that way. Your heart beat like crazy but so did Neteyam’s. The hard thumping in his chest was just from excitement, right?

As he did flips and harsh dips, laughs escaped your mouth, both from fear and excitement.

“Oh my god,” Your voice was airy as you yelled, “I’m gonna fucking die!”

You couldn’t see his face but you were sure he rolled his eyes when he replied with, “So dramatic!”

Suddenly, he started ululating as we soared through the sky.

He sounded so happy it made your heart throb with joy.

“C’mon, Y/N! Do it with me!” He insisted.

“Teytey, I don’t know how!” You yelled over the loud sound of wind blowing in your ear.

Neteyam patted your thigh before he gripped it again and said, “Feel the energy in you! Use your tongue!”

You laughed outwardly at his sentence but nonetheless followed his instructions. A cry of absolute adrenaline left your mouth. It felt so powerful as you let all of your energy out.

“That’s my warrior!”

The praise alone made you feel like you were about to explode.

Eventually the ride had to come to a stop as eclipse was quickly pproaching. But, Neteyam still had one more thing to show you so if that meant he would break curfew then so be it.

He swooped the ikran up to the top of one of the Hallelujah mountains. The darkness of the oncoming night made the nature around you so bright. You two climbed off of the ikran, him helping you of course, and he led you to a particular spot on the floating rock. It was a grassy area that had pretty fluorescent flowers surrounding it.

His demeanor seemed to become nervous as he sat down and motioned for you to follow suit.

“Tey? What’s wrong?” You immediately noticed the change and put your right hand against his face, the left on his knee.

He sighed and leaned into your touch. “Y/N. I promised myself I would never leave you lonely like I did before. Now that you’re within my reach I never want to let you go.”

His eyes were too intense in this moment to look at. Instead you focused on his white freckles as you said, “Neteyam, you’re acting as if we haven’t seen eachother in years.”

“Even a month without you is too much for me to bear. Do you understand what I’m telling you?”

Neteyam’s hands took yours off of his body so that he could hold them. His hands fully engulfed yours.

Rolling your eyes in disbelief you said, “Dude, this is starting to sound really romantic. You don’t think of me that way don’t play with me please. I can’t do shitty jokes like this right now.”

He forced you to meet his beautiful eyes. They were full of emotion and complete adoration as he whispered, “I see you, Y/N L/N.”

Alarms were going off in your head. It all seemed too good to be true so it must not be true. You tried to change his mind by saying, “Close your eyes then because I can tell you now that I am not the one you want.”

But that did not deter him.

Neteyam felt like crying. He only ever wanted to be yours so why were you being so difficult? Neteyam spoke after a long silence, “Why do you not believe me, Y/N? I’ve chosen you since the day we met. We were eight. You strayed away from your home and got lost in the forest. I found you playing with a baby viperwolf. No fear in your heart. So don’t have fear now.”

Your heart beat painfully hard as you realized this was actually happening. The boy you loved for years has loved you too.

“Many Na’vi want you. I want you as well, Tey, more than anything. But, your future is going to be affected by you being with a human. Neytiri would disapprove of us with her whole chest. I’m sure she’d probably throw me off the mountain if she could.” A small chuckle left your mouth at the thought of that woman chucking you to your death. Your chuckle died quickly at the thought of Neteyam being with anyone else other than you. It hurt to think about. Like physically hurt your heart and brain.

You felt sick.

“I don’t care about what my mother thinks of my love life. She’s going to have to get used to it because I only want you, not anybody else. So please, take me as yours forever.” Neteyam begged, looking up through his lashes. His tail swung anxiously. God was he beautiful. The unpleasant feelings slowly melted away.

You sat as tall as you could and grabbed his face, leaning in and planting your soft lips upon his. The sound of his tail hitting the ground wildly made you smile against his lips.

He was utterly in love. Neteyam felt drunk as your mouth moved against his so gently. His arms wrapped around you and pulled you into his lap as he sat up. Everything felt like it was on fire. So many dreams of this and now it finally happened.

When you came up for air, you saw the lovestruck look in his face and you knew that he was yours forever. All worries seemed to dissipate in that moment when you looked in his eyes.

“I see you, Neteyam. And I love you.”

“I love you too, skxawng.”

#avatar #avatar way of water #neteyam x reader #neteyam sully #neteyam #writing #fanfic #reader insert #fluff #neteyam fluff #yeah this took a long ass time anywaysss

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