I keep thinking about Arthur's regression at the end of Season 2 and then into Season 3. I keep thinking about how victims of trauma tend to get worse once they escape their traumatic situation. How their body and mind start to crack and shake under the weight of the horrors, now safe enough to escape the survivorship mindset but now forced to endure the fallout.
I keep thinking of how hard Faroe's death hit Arthur. How his guilt and grief were so intense that he wanted to kill himself, so low that he drank himself into a stupor for who knows how many years to just dull the pain. I keep imagining how hard it was to pull himself out of that, to work with Parker and find a new meaning in life, to walk away from his guilt of killing his daughter, and instead to help people.
(I keep thinking of how Arthur finds a vial of alcohol in the Dreamlands. How he sniffs it and recoils in disgust.)
I keep thinking of how long it took for Arthur to build himself back up from his lowest point, to tuck the guilt of Faroe in the deepest corner of his mind just so that he has enough room to breathe, to live, to be a better person. (And yet, Faroe is every facet of his life. It's his first memory in Season One, when he plays Faroe's Song, when he doesn't even remember his own name. It's the last name on his lips when he dies on that boat. It's his only memory when John is torn away from him.) I keep thinking about how Arthur is consciously repressing her every second of every day just so that he can keep going.
And then John pushes, and asks, and asks again. And finally, after almost dying twice with this entity, after surviving time and time again, he thinks he can trust him. He thinks he can share his deepest secret, to pull open the wound he keeps stitching over to protect himself. How he risks feeling the grief he's suppressed for years to trust someone. I keep thinking how John seizes it and, because he is ancient and young and inexperienced, childlike in his tantrums and his fears of responsibility and consequence, he uses it as a weapon the moment he's backed into a corner. I keep thinking of how not only the trust is torn away from Arthur, but how his wound is stretched and torn, and not only does his guilt and grief come back, but it's like a tidal wave that he cannot suppress this time. He's opened that wound and John has pried it wider, and now Arthur can't shut it. He survives in those pits, but she is all he thinks of. He escapes those pits, and ("Goodbye, Faroe.") she is all he thinks of. He slits his throat and she's all he thinks of.
He enters at icy cabin (a small gurgle, a bundle of blankets in his arm, a warm hum rumbling in his chest as he lulls his whole World to sleep) and he thinks of her to keep going.
And then Yellow enters, a blank slate, a John before he was John, and the pain is too fresh. This is the thing that tortured him. This is the thing that starved him. This is the thing who asked who his daughter was, and when he told him, the thing called him a killer. John and Yellow and the King are all the same in that moment, and Arthur's too fucked up and traumatized to separate them tangibly, as much as he insists that he can. His hatred grows and grows, all from himself, until it bleeds into Yellow, and he remakes this entity in his image, in his self-pitying hatred.
So when Yellow finally calls him a monster (and Arthur knows, he's called himself that the moment he saw the water spill from the bathtub onto the tile below), Arthur holds it close to his chest, and becomes it.
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i would like to promote matt dahan's radio-musical series, pulp musicals bc it is SORELY underappreciated. it features james tolbert, mariah rose faith, curt mega w other starkid members making guest appearances (kim whalen and jaime lynn beatty are featured in the second episode) and is based on a real lide event where a struggling new york newspaper began claiming their was proof of intelligent life and a civilization on the moon.
in the musical, the stratford twins, rose and samuel, are behind the plot, using famous astronomer john herschel's name within the lie to add more credibility, claiming the information comes from his journals. chaos ensues as everyone believes the lie and they end up digging themselves further into the mess as the newspaper samuel works for keeps wanting more stories from john herschel's journals leading to betrayals and ppl who they never expected to discover their lie discover it. and that's just in episode 1!
the songs and lyrics and music in general is gorgeous highly recommend.
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i know i run the risk of pissing off my favorite anon who came into my inbox to call me names BUT i'm seeing a lot of reviews for iwtv s2 that are basically just whining about the lack of lestat. i can only speak for myself, but as someone who LOVES lestat i did not think the season suffered because he was not there. i think those reviewers should open their minds a bit more. also, to my knowledge, no one has seen episodes 7 and 8, so who knows what could happen?
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Idk if you already answered an ask like this already but does Splinter and Donnie have a good father and son relationship? 🤔
For the most part, yeah it's good. Splinter still has his flaws of course, as much as he loves Donnie he isn't always very good at showing it, and he's still dealing with some pretty intense depression.
That being said, taking care of one mutant turtle child, while still hard, is significantly easier than care of four. Because of that, Splinter in this AU is able to dedicate a lot more time to Donnie. On the flipside, because Donnie doesn't have any siblings to entertain him, he seeks out Splinter for company a lot more, and Splinter isn't always able to give all of the attention that he needs. But overall, I'd say they are closer in the AU than they are in canon, considering they've mostly only been able to rely on each other for so long.
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