#was just about 2 say i missed these two angst machines and u go and give me this | Explore Tumblr Posts and Blogs

meltwonu · 4 years

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| 🍒 CH-CH-CHERRY BOMB! 🍒 | [CHAPTER 11]

pairing; dom!seungcheol x camgirl!reader

this chapter’s notes; camshow, dom!seungcheol, daddy kink, fingering, oral(fem receiving), overstimulation, a little angst/mentions of theft, but some soft lovin for the masses after the last chapter 😭😭💕, also i think this goes without saying but just in case! There won’t be any Cherry Bomb chapters going up while Monster Mash is happening(same for the drabble game)! So this is our last chapter until Nov 6th!🥺 HAVE A GOOD WEEKEND!!!🍒

chapters; 1 - 2 - 3 - 4 - 5 - 6 - 7 - 8 - 9 - 10 - 11 - ?

“Well… Welcome home.”

Seungcheol shoots you a small smile from behind as he watches you trudge past him towards the bed. He toes his shoes off quietly before setting your things down by the sofa, a soft sigh on his lips.

“Seungcheol, are you really sure about this? Really, I can just get a hotel...”

He sits with you on the bed; arm draped around your shoulder as he tucks you into his side. “We’re really going to need to figure things out pretty quickly but… yes. I’m sure. I mean, even if it’s just temporarily until you can find a safer place to live in. Which, by the way, can we talk about that? If you’re okay with it.”

Biting your lip, you slightly pull away as you peer up at Seungcheol. He takes note of your puffy, red eyes; a frown of his own painted on his face. He could hear your sniffles the entire ride back home but he decided to not say anything, in fear of exacerbating the situation.

“I---It happened a couple months ago. Do you remember that week I was doing a stream per day as a thank you gift for my subscribers? Well, I stepped out one afternoon to run some errands and---and when I came back, the door was just ...ajar. But also, nothing was really missing? Just a few things here and there I knew I wouldn’t miss and my filming camera. I didn’t think it was that big of a deal, but the cops came by to take a statement anyway...”

“Didn't you stream that night though?”

You nod shamefully, “I know I shouldn’t have, but I figured since nothing stolen was really irreplaceable. And I had a spare camera I ended up using so I thought it’d be okay.”

The two of you sigh in unison, settling into the quietness of Seungcheol, and now, your apartment. “Well, I’m glad you’re safe. That’s the most important thing, right?”

“Yeah, and I’ll help with the bills and stuff, ‘Cheol! We’ll go halfsies on it, okay? I’ll pull my weight around here.”

You shoot him a shy smile as you wrap your arms around one of his. “Maybe I should take up Jeongguk with that collab stream idea…”

“Speaking of…”

‘Hey, it’s late but I need a favour when you’re free.’

Jeon 🥴: wussup u kno im always awake

‘Are you up for a trade?’

Jeon 🥴: why do u sound like jigsaw 😭😭

Jeon 🥴: also it depends

‘You help me move all of Cherry’s things to my apartment and she agrees to do a livestream with you.’

Jeon 🥴: the--

Jeon 🥴: just tell me when and where baby i got u

Sunday morning is a whirlwind of phone calls and favour-chains, big boxes and Jeongguk knocking early in the morning when he finally shows up.

“I’m ready to go whenever! Seokjin-hyung’s pretty upset he has to take my early shift but I promised him that I’d take his night shift and swore to never mention the time he broke the hot dog machine to Namjoon.”

Seungcheol turns to you, “So, I called the police department and asked if there were any updates and what we can do. All they could really tell me is that we’re free to go back to the apartment since they replaced the door and that they’ve already taken as many fingerprints as they can, so we can go get your things.” He pauses, “We probably shouldn’t try to take everything so quickly so we should go in and get your essential things and then just go back to grab the others later on, if that’s okay?”

You nod in response, making sure you have your things before the three of you head out. “My landlord texted me and told me to tell her when we get there so she can give me the new key.”

Jeongguk pops the gum in his mouth, heavy boots resounding through the apartment as he makes his way to the door.

“Let’s go get some shit!”

“So can we discuss the deal we got going on here?” Jeongguk bounces with giddiness from Seungcheol’s backseat, unable to sit still at the thought.

“Well, we can do two streams.” You take a second to turn around from the front seat, eyes locking onto Jeongguk who immediately leans in towards your face. “One on yours and one on mine. We’ll split whatever money we make and call it a day?”

“Wait a second, two streams? Why would he be on yours?” Seungcheol narrows his eyes at the road in front of him; knuckles tightening around the steering wheel.

He wasn’t even properly in a live cam and now Jeongguk was going to be?

“Oh, I don’t think Seungcheol-hyung would like it very much. Although I will say, my stroke game is preeeeetty good.”

“No, you idiots, not like that!” Seungcheol snorts from the driver’s seat just as you roll your eyes. “On ‘Guk’s channel, we’ll just game. That’s it. Keep it PG, y’know? But on mine… We’ll still game, just… with some added bonuses. I’ve already thought it out, okay? Just trust me. We can do it on Friday night and Saturday night respectively, so we don’t kill our schedules too much.”

The two males nod in return as you turn back around to face forward. “Which, by the way, thank you Jeongguk for agreeing to come and bring the heavy stuff with us. I really appreciate it!”

Jeongguk smiles, although you can’t see it. “Hey, it’s no problem! And anyway, I already might’ve told my viewers that I’d be having a special guest soon so...” He trails off sheepishly; a pale pink blush on his cheeks.

“Wow, well, I guess if there’s anything we should be thankful for… At least they didn’t take the sybian.”

“Ugh, hyung, it’s probably because they couldn’t tell what it was. And they probably didn’t take a lot of the sex toys because they were probably freaked out.”

Jeongguk’s voice gets quieter and quieter as he exits the apartment that you and Seungcheol were still in.

“What’s the damage, baby?”

You sigh as you sit down on the bed, rummaging through a box of personal items. “It seems like they made more of a mess trying to find anything of worth, to be honest. Most of the things taken were gifts and some of my toys but the ones that were still in their packages. Some of my camera and lighting equipment also got taken… Same goes for some of the lingerie sets you got me that were still in their packaging… ‘m sorry, ‘Cheol.” You pout up at him as he chuckles.

Seungcheol stands in front of you, tilting your head up to meet his warm eyes. “That’s literally fine. You can always get more of those things anyway.”

He kisses you gently on the forehead; fingertips threaded through your hair. “Hey, if you’re still doing a show on Wednesday, I’ve got an idea.” Seungcheol offers.

“You? Have an idea?” You raise a brow at him, unsure whether or not to believe him. But before either of you can speak, Jeongguk comes back, boots stomping loudly on the hardwood.

“Let’s talk about this another time, when we’re alone.”

The two of you take the next couple of days in stride as you settle into your new place; whether it was temporarily or permanently for you.

Seungcheol continues his normal work routine and to some degree, you find yourself even more bored without him. For a while, you contemplate getting a part time job, at least to make up some extra money for rent and so that you weren’t always at home alone.

“Hey, I’m back!”

Ah, perfect timing.

You meet Seungcheol at the door, already dressed in one of his shirts. “‘Cheollie~ Welcome home!”

“Have a fun day without me?” He asks, shucking off his jacket and shoes before making his way to the sofa.

“Errr, well, I had some thoughts… and some questions.”

“Okay, shoot.”

You sit across from him, eyes blinking in unsureness as he stares at you. “Well… I was thinking… about maybe getting a part time job? I know we kinda made a lot with the last videos but, it’d help me not be so bored when you’re gone and hey, extra money is always good, right? I can replace all the stuff that got stolen too.” Seungcheol nods in thought, “Maybe you can find a place that’ll give you early shifts so I can just swing by and get you after work. I’d say come work at the roller rink but I don’t think that’d be the smartest idea...”

“I’ll find a place! I was going through the job listings earlier and there were some promising places~” A weight feels lifted from your shoulders as you smile back at Seungcheol; glad that he seemed to be willing to work with you and what you wanted. “Oh and… about the show tonight? What was your idea? We totally forgot about it.”

Seungcheol laughs breathily, running a hand through his hair as he gets up from the sofa to head towards the kitchen.

“Let’s let it be a surprise. C’mon, I wanna try a new recipe from our cookbooks.”

You set up the cameras as per Seungcheol’s request, checking the viewfinder. “Are you sure about this, ‘Cheol? You don’t have to be on cam with me if you don’t want to…”

Seungcheol chuckles as he tugs his shirt off, leaving his sweats on as he gets onto the bed with you. He checks the viewfinder with you, making sure the angle cuts off right at his collarbones. “I’m sure, and as long as the cameras don’t shift, we should be fine. I wanted to try this.”

The unknown factor scares you a little bit, but you trust Seungcheol enough to know that he knows what he’s doing.

“Now, c’mere.” He gestures to you as you tilt your head at him. “But there’s still, like, 12 minutes until we need to start…”

“Yeah, but we’re doing things my way tonight, right, sweetheart?”

Nodding slowly, you crawl on your knees towards Seungcheol, stopping right in front of him as he leans in to give you a chaste kiss. You smile into it, melting under his touch before he pulls away.

“Turn around for me, baby.”

The mood shifts quickly when he slips into character and you can feel your heart racing in your chest when his arms wrap around your midsection. He tugs you towards himself until your back meets his warm naked chest.

“Daddy just wants to make you feel good, princess. Don’t you want that?”

The warmth blooms inside your chest at Seungcheol’s soft voice, “Mmhmm…”

You check the viewfinder to see half of your face cut off and Seungcheol’s head out of frame. His arms are wrapped firmly around your midsection before his hands start to roam your lingerie-clad body. “My babygirl’s had such a rough week. I think she deserves to be treated like a princess tonight.” You gulp as Seungcheol whispers into your hair; a content sigh on your lips when he cups your breasts in his palms.

“Let me make you feel good, okay?”

You lean your head up against his shoulder as his fingertips continue to roam; letting him take the reins.

He slides your bra straps down your shoulders gently, kissing the skin before he slides the material from you. His hands find their way back to your breasts, squeezing them in his hands as you mewl. “S--Seungcheol…”

His eyes flit to the clock on the wall. “Looks like it’s time, sweetheart.”

Nodding, you lean away from his touch for a second as you click the red button on your laptop screen that indicates you were live. It gives a countdown of three seconds just as you situate yourself back in Seungcheol’s lap.

gentleman_josh95: whoa what

universe_WZ: yo wait

angelhan: ????

kitty_junjun has donated $69

kitty_junjun: for my favorite couple

“H--Hi guys…” You whimper; lips falling into a silent moan when Seungcheol pinches your nipples between his fingers. “I--I, um, a-ah, daddy wanted to s-start early so…”

sleepy_wonu: ….interesting

sleepy_wonu has donated $50

therealchan99: btw u didnt have a show on sat! everything okay?

“Ah, ye---yeah, just, some stuff came u-up, is all. Sorry!” You shoot the camera a sheepish smile, hoping that nobody else presses for more.

Seungcheol notices the way you tense up in his hold as he kisses the crown of your head.

“Daddy’s taking care of it now, isn’t that right, babygirl?” The comments and donations flood the screen as Seungcheol talks; questions of who he was and comments about the previous videos still lingering in your viewers minds as they continue to praise the two of you.

He takes your distraction as an opportunity to ghost his hands down your torso until they flit along the edge of the waistband of your panties.

“Spread your legs a little more, baby. Let them see how wet your panties are getting.”

sleepy_wonu: seems like daddy dom.cheol finally got his hands on you huh lol

sleepy_wonu: somehow i knew you’d make a good pair.

tangerine_kwan: the--------------

hoshi_tiger_xx: wait how r u sure

chwenon: actually.... 🥴🥴🥴

sleepy_wonu: i mean, do u see him in here? Isnt it weird he hasnt donated yet?

alphagyu97: goddamn he rly went from private show to actual fucking?

alphagyu97: … living his best life, i cant even complain

For a second, you want to respond, but you let the comments go on to see what else they had to say before chiming in.

A blush blooms on your cheeks when Seungcheol ghosts his fingers over your panties; hips rising off of the bed when he presses into the growing wet patch on the material. He chuckles lightly as he, too, reads over the comments.

“Guess we’re caught, huh?” You can’t help but giggle at Seungcheol’s lighthearted approach to them finding out; glad that he seemed to be okay with it.

chwenon: bruh he said stroke game on ✨x-games✨

xcaliburDK: wait so r u guys gonna be on cam together regularly now?

artist8hao: damn, shouldve known he was packin

“Erm… we--well, not necessarily! He’ll, maybe, join me for some here and, mmh, there but… but that’s it for, ah, n-now..”

Seungcheol drags his fingers up and down your folds through your panties as the material starts to stick to you like a second skin. He noticed you’d hit your show minimum where you usually liked to really start your show, moments prior.

“But for today, I thought I’d take it slow with our babygirl. Let her feel nice and good after her long week.” He checks the viewfinder one more time to make sure everything’s okay before he drags his fingers back to the waistband of your panties as he starts to push them down. “Help me get these off of you, sweetheart.”

You replace his hands with yours as you shimmy the soaked material down your legs until you can kick them off.

Spreading your legs, you make sure you’re directly in the camera’s views as Seungcheol brings his fingertips down to your soaking cunt. “Look at her. I’ve only been touching her for a little while and she’s already so fuckin’ wet for me.”

tangerine_kwan: fuck, give her what she wants

artist8hao: sink those fingers into her tight pussy just like what she likes

Seungcheol drags his fingers through your wet folds teasingly slow as you whine. “M-more… daddy…” He hums in response, middle finger on your clit as he rubs slow circles. Your eyes slide close at his gentle touch, body filled with warmth as you rest against him. You even momentarily forget that the two of you were being watched live; if not for the sounds of donations and comments pouring out of your speakers.

“Babygirl, don’t you have an announcement for your viewers?” He grins against your hair just as he runs his fingers through your wetness again; this time, positioning two fingers at your entrance as he slowly sinks them into you.

He starts a slow pace as he pumps them inside of your warm walls, curling and scissoring them as you clench around the digits.

“A-ah, y--yeah, this Friday I--I’m doing a collab stream on--on, ngh, G-Golden Closet Gaming and, fuh--fuck, on Saturday we’ll be doing a collab stream on, hah, my ch--channel!”

xcaliburDK: wait u kno gcg too?

therealchan99: threesome?

angelhan: wow this channel is growing so fast

“N-no, ah, d-daddy wouldn’t like that very m-much but, mmh, it’s---it’s for a good reason! I promise~!” You let out a choked sob just as Seungcheol starts thrusting his fingers faster; heels digging into the sheets as your legs threaten to clamp shut.

“Ah, ah, ah, keep your legs spread, baby. They have to see your pretty ‘lil cunt stretched wide around my fingers.” He kisses your hair once more before he ever so slowly adds a third finger, pumping them into you slowly. Your nails dig into his thighs at the fullness you feel, hips bucking up as you meet his fingers.

“O-oh my god, ‘m suh--so full!” You whimper, eyes clamped shut.

You already feel yourself close to an orgasm as your thighs start to shake. Seungcheol takes notice of the way your pussy gets tighter around his fingers and the way your breath becomes more stuttered as he curls his fingers inside of you.

“Cum for me, sweetheart. Get my fingers nice and wet.” Seungcheol coos.

“D---daddy!”

The donations and comments flood the screen with words of praise as your orgasm washes over you; back bowing away from Seungcheol as your body locks up in his lap. He places the pad of his thumb on your clit as he starts rubbing circles on the swollen nub, laughing lightly when your thighs clamp shut around his arm.

universe_WZ: so fuckin pretty when she cums

alphagyu97: a sweet babygirl getting what she deserves

Small cries fall off your lips as the oversensitivity starts to bite and you bring your hand to Seungcheol’s forearm as you whine and try to push his hand away. “Mmh… ‘m sensitive now…”

He nods gently as he slowly eases his fingers out of your soaking pussy. “Spread your legs.”

You shakily follow his orders as you catch your breath; shaky legs parting for the camera to see. Seungcheol brings his wet fingers to your lips as you start to lick and clean them of your wetness.

kitty_junjun: fuck and she’s such a good girl too

universe_WZ: a good babygirl who knows how to clean up her messes huh

Seungcheol clears his throat, adrenaline rushing through his veins, “I want you to cum one more time for me, baby. Think you can?” You blink sleepily at the camera, foggy eyes already noticing you’d somehow made twice as much in this show despite Seungcheol not being any of the donators.

“I---I think so, daddy…”

He nods, gulping as he slowly starts to move from behind you. “Good, because you’re gonna cum on my tongue for everyone now.”

Arousal pools in you at Seungcheol’s words and you shoot him a panicked look when he gets up from the bed. He smiles at you softly, rounding the bed and entering the camera’s view with the back of his head showing.

“Lean up against the pillows, sweetheart. Let them see your cute face when you’re cumming on daddy’s tongue.”

angelhan: blue hair huh

sleepy_wonu: lol tryna keep tabs so u kno who to look for?

alphagyu97: maybe

therealchan99: yes but no

Seungcheol takes a deep breath before he lays on his stomach between your legs, hands on your thighs as he places them over his shoulders. He’s slightly nervous; if only because he’s worried he might accidentally show his face. But he steels himself, smiling up at you once before he leans in, tongue already flicking at your sensitive clit before you can even properly get situated.

“Oh, f-fuck!” Your hands immediately tangle into Seungcheol’s hair as you throw your head back against the pillows.

This time, he doesn’t start slow; his plump lips around your clit as he sucks hard. “D--Daddy, please!” You whine as you dig your heels into his back and Seungcheol is quick to laugh against your skin. He kisses your clit; smirking when you jolt under his touch.

“What’s wrong, baby? Too much? Do you want me to stop?” He lets you catch your breath as you slowly bring your head down to look at him; bleary eyes focused on his wet lips and twinkling eyes.

“N-no… jus’ wanna c-cum again…’m really close already ‘cause ‘m sensitive...”

Seungcheol hums, leaning in closer as he drags his tongue from your clit to your entrance, slightly dipping his tongue in as you moan above him. He repeats this process a few times, teasing you as you whine and squirm.

xcaliburDK: goddamn her expressions are so cute

chwenon: she rly does look good like this

hoshi_tiger_xx: better than her toys

universe_WZ has donated $100

angelhan has donated $75

hoshi_tiger_xx has donated $50

You get lost in the pleasure, already on the brink of your second orgasm when Seungcheol sucks your clit back into his mouth. He draws you in closer by your thighs when he feels you shaking under his touch; doubling his efforts when he can already feel your body start to lock up.

Seungcheol flattens his tongue against you, dragging his tongue up and down in hard strokes.

“Fuck, daddy, I’m---I’m c-cumming!”

Tears wet your lashes as you cum hard on his tongue; fingertips locked tight in his hair as your hips cant up into his mouth. He lets you do as you please, letting you ride his tongue as you take your pleasure from him.

The sounds of donations and comments pour in from behind Seungcheol’s back and he has an itching feeling that the shows in which he actually appeared were going to be more popular from now on.

Not that he’d complain.

Your soft cries from above pull Seungcheol from his thoughts as he slowly eases his tongue off of you; kissing your sensitive clit one last time as you squirm.

“Nooooo~” You cry, pushing his head away as he laughs.

“It was nice meeting you all~” Seungcheol comments as he slides out of view of the camera. “I’ll let you take it from here, sweetheart.”

You smile tiredly at Seungcheol, wiping the sweat from your brow as you close your shaky legs.

“Thank you, daddy~”

“Did you still want to get a part time job? I mean… these numbers…”

Muttering, Seungcheol turns off all the lights before he slides under the bedsheets with you, laptop dead-center as the two of you look at the amount of donations you’d made from the single live show.

“Yeah, I think it’d be fun! And anyway, I might’ve already found a place! And with a friend!” You grin at him just as you slam your laptop shut; confusion painted on his features even in the darkness.

“A friend? And where?”

“’Dynamite’! With Jun!”

Seungcheol snorts, flopping into his pillow. “You serious? Why there?”

You snuggle up to his side, resting your head on his arm as you stare up at his side profile. “They’re hiring, Jun would know my schedule the best, and I’d have someone familiar with me.” Pausing, you smirk up at him even if he can’t see it. “And they probably have cute little pastel diner outfits… With a cute ‘lil skirt… And if I bend over enough for you, maybe you’ll see my cute ‘lil panties that are already wet just thinkin’ about you… ‘n maybe you’ll have to take me back to your car and fuck me in your backseat and cum all over my cute outfit.”

Seungcheol nods in though, images of you bent over the hood of his car with your panties pushed to the side as he fucks you in the parking lot; the risk of everyone seeing you making his cock throb in his sweats.

“Hmm... Touché.”

#cherrybomb!cheol #scoups smut #seungcheol smut #seventeen smut #svt smut #seventeen fic #svt fic #seungcheol scenarios #scoups scenarios #seungcheol imagines #scoups imagines #svt imagines #svt scenarios #seventeen scenarios #seventeen imagines

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sokkisky · 3 years

Text

~please bunny come back to me~

Want to make a request?: https://forms.gle/NyZgUcqkCPzHRvVn6

Ghost School RP Discord: https://discord.gg/5mschvebTn

Rating: SFW (Angst to Fluff)

Pairing: Tamaki Amajiki x Pro Hero Y/N

Warnings: Serious injury, arguing (tense words)

A/N: Hi you beautiful milky buds! How are you doing? I’m so grateful to have each and every single one of you. I have been getting so many questions lately and here requests are ALWAYS open. I do post DAILY. Just to clear some things up.

If you have a million ideas you want me to write, create a million requests I really don’t mind. Not to mention if you want a request for another anime, go for it! If I don’t write for that anime I will tell you. You’ll have the most luck with these to name a few

~MHA/BNHA

~Fairy Tail

~Haikyu!

~Blue Exorcist

To name a few. If you want to ask about another feel free to ask me! Today’s request reads like this.

Hi! Its me @megustaitachi again lol. I LOVED the request I asked you a few days ago, you wrote it SO SOFT AHH PRECIOUS😭💓. I want to ask you a question, if you don't mind I'll be here making request of my favs characters hehe, is there's a name we can call you? Obviously if you feel comfortable, I would like to know, thanks! *Now the real request* Can I request an scenario or a series*if u want* when Pro Hero Tamaki and his Pro Hero s/o have a fight and the next day y/n have a fight with a villain and they fell like in coma and Tamaki is sad because they didn't apologize for the fight but then y/n wakes up and they apologized and end up cuddling. <3 *yes, I love angst that ends in cuddles ⊂(・﹏・⊂)* Thanks! <3

<3 I said it last time and I'll say it again, I LOVE YOUR WORK KWHWOW💓🙌🏼

Thank you, thank you so much for this request! It’s so angsty ah my poor bby tama. Also you can call me Sokki! Sok, Milky, are a few of my nicknames too so I don’t mind if you call me those either.

I’m thinking I might make part two of this but I am not sure either. If you want one tell me though!

I love love love LOVE you guys and please please remember to take care of yourselves, be kind to yourself and treat yo self! You are worth it all, don’t ever forget how special and important you are! Now I don’t want to keep you waiting for too long, I hope this meets your expectations. Enjoy!

Part Two

“You shouldn’t have done that!”

You sat on the couch, your head in your hands as Tamaki frantically paced in front of you. You knew he was just upset, just worried, but there was no way you could’ve predicted the villain’s next move. You didn’t know that moving to the spot that you did would put you in danger.

“Tamaki I know I messed up! Let it go!” you finally shouted back. Your head rising from your hands. Tamaki stopped pacing and turned to look at you.

“Let it go?” he asked, his voice rising. “You nearly got yourself killed, like you were trying to hurt yourself.” he said, his voice shaky. He hated arguing with you. He hated it so much. He wanted to sit down and cuddle you, forget this ever happened but you could’ve gotten hurt!

“Oh I wanted to get hurt?” you said back in frustration, becoming a bit outraged. Tamaki nodded as both of your phones rang. You answered with a frustrated sigh.

Another villain was on the loose and they needed the two of you.

Being a pro hero dating a pro hero was hard, but being a pro hero fighting your pro hero significant other and then having to fight with them is different. You sighed, turning to Tamaki heading towards the door. He followed behind you.

“Are you gonna hurt yourself again this time?” he asked, annoyed slightly. You ran out in front of him, Tamaki following behind as you ran to the crime scene. “Watch out I just might, then you won’t have such an incompetent partner huh Tama?” you said sarcastically. Tamaki sighed.

“Wouldn’t that be nice” he murmured to himself. You almost stopped running and he could feel the regret sink in about what he said. You turned to him, opening your mouth to say something, but you ended up just shaking your head and continuing to run to the crime scene.

~~~

All you hear was Tamaki shouting out to you, “Bunny watch out!” as you shielded an innocent bystander before you were engulfed in a ball of blue flame, the fire exploded into a terrible blue explosion.

Your world went dark and you felt like you were in a void. You could feel rustling beneath you, you saved someone’s life, but at what cost? You fell back, feeling your back hit the paved road. Your eyes couldn’t open, they were closed. Your mouth, your lungs, gasping for air as you felt yourself slip. You heard voices,

‘Bunny! Bunny!’

You could faintly feel something on your shoulders. But then it all faded, diminishing into darkness.

~~~

Tamaki wandered the streets a bouquet of roses in his hand. Today was supposed to be your anniversary together. He walked, the rain beginning to lightly dribble down, his tears falling down his cheeks. He missed you, dearly, and he couldn’t get those horrible things he said to you out of his head.

2 months passed by now and Tamaki was doing mediocre hero work. Every day he’d look at your costume and hold it close to him, crying alone in your lonely apartment. The apartment the two of you shared.

He wanted everything of yourself. He kept it around the house, sometimes he’d go through your clothes, trying to see if any scent of you still lingered behind. He'd eat your favorite snacks and watch the shows and movies you’d like. Your apartment walls were covered in pictures of you, your Pro Hero merch was everywhere. Anyone would think he’d be a crazed super fan but he was just in pain. He wanted nothing more than to hold you and apologize over and over again.

But he couldn’t.

His alarm went off on his phone and he quickly grabbed his jacket and threw on his shoes, rushing out of the apartment.

~~~

“Welcome back Tamaki.” the brown haired lady said. She clicked her fingers along her keyboard as she sat behind the desk of the hospital. “You know the way, and you’re here just on time. Visiting hours have started so go on ahead.” she said, giving him a small smile.

Tamaki nodded and made his way through the hospital to the ICU.

He made his way to your room, opening the door. You were hooked up to dozens of machines and monitors, many lines moving into your arms and chest. Tamaki was here every day he could be, but it didn’t get any easier. He realized he forgot the roses at home but it didn’t matter much. He pulled up a seat, sitting beside you like he normally did.

He rubbed your forehead and cheeks gently, tears rolling down his eyes. He felt the emotions bubble in him all over again and his head plopped down on your chest, his hands beside his head. He sobbed uncontrollably. His body shook as the blankets muffled his cries. The room had been changed for you, what with all of the plush blankets, soft pillows, plushies, and clothes he brought here for you. He brought you a switch even though you couldn’t play it. He bought a mini fridge and snack basket so he could fill them when you woke up.

But you weren’t waking up.

The pain in him was almost unbearable. His muffled apologies filled the otherwise quiet room. He couldn’t help it, not able to ever hold it in when he was next to you.

But then he stopped.

He could only feel it slightly but he sat up, his eyes going wide as he stared right into yours. He was frozen in place, was he dreaming? Your beautiful eyes were staring back at him. Tamaki remembered what the doctors told him what would’ve happened when you woke up. You’d be confused, not sure who he was or what was going on. Tamaki quickly rushed up and hit the button requesting a doctor. He sat back next to you holding your hand.

Your finger moved again.

You were back to him, and he wouldn’t let you go again.

To be continued...

164 notes · View notes

clockworkgraystairs · 4 years

Text

Letting Go

Rating: M

Warnings: Major character death. Angst. Mentions of sex. Angst. Accidents. Did I mention angst?

Summary:

Cardan thought he and his family were meant to live happily ever after.

He was wrong.

Extra comments: I’m sorry. Please don’t hate me.

Extra comments 2: If you’re masochist as me and wish to read this listening to some music, I’ll leave my spotify playlist “Don’t touch me, I’m angsty”

Thank you to the incredible @sweetlyvillainous for holding my hand while I cried because of this, for betaing later and for giving the extra boost to the angst. YES YOU DID, AND YOU’RE AS GUILTY AS ME. I love u.

Masterlist • AO3

As dawn went on, Cardan looked through the window with hooded eyes. It snowed outside. How typical, he thought.

Not long ago he would’ve been excited about it. The perspective of spending the day building snow castles and angels. Never a snowman, since his daughter had always claimed that was too cliché. He would mock her for it and build tiny figures around her castle. ‘The invasion of the fae snowmen’ he’d called it, despite the insistence of his wife about that being pure nonsense.

He laid on his bed, staring at nothing in particular. From that position he would normally be able to look at her, snoring softly in the opposite pillow. That used to be his favorite moment of the day. Few minutes that he could spend watching how she slept, calm and unbothered. At least until he couldn’t help it anymore and woke her up, trailing her neck with soft and playful kisses.

Cold sheets coiled around him now. A reminder of the empty space next to him that haunted Cardan at the beginning and end of each day. Screaming into the silence she’s gone.

The morning it happened, Ivy wanted pancakes an old store sold a couple of blocks away. Cardan was reluctant to get up. All groggy because he and Jude had spent the night before rolling on the sheets, barely moaning in each other’s mouths trying not to wake their 7 year old. He didn’t want to get up. But his daughter was as stubborn as his wife. So Jude gave him a long sweet kiss and told him to go back to sleep while she fetched breakfast.

He did.

He shouldn’t have.

He should’ve gone with her. He should’ve gone instead. Or better yet, he should’ve convinced her to stay and make the bloody pancakes himself. Anything.

Anything except letting Jude go out alone. She was supposed to be back in a matter of minutes, but she didn’t. And he didn’t notice it because he fell asleep again.

He missed the first phone call. And the second.

It wasn’t until a tiny hand woke him up and handed him the cellphone. Frowning with dizziness at Jude’s two missed calls he was about to dial back when it rang again.

“Hey babe, sorry. What’s up?” He mumbled, ruffling Ivy’s hair.

The voice that answered was not Jude’s, instantly startling him awake.

“Yes, he’s speaking.” Loud voices and sirens muffled the voice, making it hard to hear. “I’m- I’m sorry I’m not understanding, where is my wife? Give her the phone so I can speak to her plea-”

He didn’t record the moment when he put on the first clothes he found, nor calling his old college friends that lived two doors away to come and watch little Ivy.

He didn’t watch for the red lights or cared if he’d parked the right way in the hospital’s parking lot. The world seemed to spiral around him, an unending parade of walls, doors, people in white or blue suits. Voices filled him with details but he could only partially hear them. Something about a kid crossing the street unsupervised and Jude running after him. His heartbeat roared in his ears.

“We’re glad we could reach you Mr. Greenbriar. It’s always better when the patient doesn’t have to go through it alone.”

“Through it? What are you-”

“I’m really sorry. The internal damage is too much...”

The doctor’s voice faded away as they entered the room. Fighting to bite back a sob he approached the resting figure on the bed. She looked like his wife, but something was deeply wrong. Her face was awfully pale and her lips dry and bruised. Wires rested along her body. The monitor connected to them matched the aching slowness in her breathing. There was no trace of the playful Jude that teased him mercilessly day after day, stealing kisses from his mouth and knowing he’d let her do whatever she wanted to him.

He found himself still standing centimeters away from her, paralyzed.

The doctor leaned to touch her shoulder and whispered something to her ear. Her eyelids fluttered a moment before opening, not with the fierceness they carried everyday but tired, wandering.

Pulling out of his frozen state he reached for her hand, covered in bandages and stroke it softly. “Jude.”

Her eyes found him and a weak smile curved her lips. “You made it.” She said with a raspy voice. He kneeled, fully taking her hand in his. The door knob clicked as they were left alone.

“Of course I did.” He choked out, trying to match her smile. It felt as if a thin string was keeping him together. “I’m here to take you home.”

Jude looked at him the way she did every time he promised to bring the stars down for her. She squeezed his hand with a nonexistent force that physically hurt in his chest. “You were always a terrible liar.”

Cardan opened his mouth to joke back but wasn’t able to make more than a suffocated sound. That’s when the first tear rolled down his cheek. He squeezed his eyes shut for a moment, opening them as he felt her thumb wiping away the wetness under them. “It’s ok.”

The string snapped.

“No, it’s not Jude, gods I’m- I’m...” He sobbed, incapable of stopping himself anymore. “I’m so sorry, it was all my fault. If I’d gone with you, If I’d…”

“Hey, no. It’s ok.” She cooed, holding him as he buried his face in her neck apologizing over and over. “Cardan, this was not your fault. Please.”

He let her hold him as his body trembled with broken weeps. Cardan shut his eyes close, hoping he would open them and be back home. Not here. Not in this nightmare. They had so much to do, so much to live. He was meant to be with her through everything. He was meant to protect her. And he had neglected everything for five more sleeping minutes instead. If Ivy hadn’t woken him up… If he’d missed another phone call…

If he’d answered the first damn time he might have had more time. There was an ache in his chest making it harder to breathe, to think.

They laid together for several minutes, hearing nothing more than their breathings and the beeping machine.

“Stay, my love.” He begged, the knot in his throat making it harder to speak. “Fight. I can’t do it without you, I’m not strong enough. I need you, we need you… Ivy...”

Something wet landed on his cheek. Only then he realized she’d started crying too. “You’ll take care of her. You can, you’re the strongest man I’ve ever known.”

He felt her breathing falter and he backed up a little, afraid he’d harm her but Jude didn’t let him go. “I love you. I always have, even when you used to make my life a living hell all those years ago. I love you and our daughter so much.” She said. Cardan sobbed again. Don’t, he wanted to answer, don’t say goodbye. Not yet. “And know that even when you can’t see me, I will be with you always.”

“I know,” He whispered back, now wiping her tears away and leaning to kiss her. “I love you, Jude Duarte. You are the best gift life could give me. You saw the best in me when nobody else could and for that and everything else, I’ll be eternally grateful. I’ll... watch out for Ivy, and she will know her mom is a hero, I promise.”

She breathed a laugh and asked him to hold her again. He did, he clung to her as tightly as he could without hurting her, breathing ‘I love you’ on her hair until her hand lost strength around him.

Until the monitor gave out one long final beep and took his heart with it.

He’d kept his vow. He’d continued with his life, dedicating every second of it to take care of their little girl. To make sure she was happy and wasn’t that affected from her mother’s passing.

Ivy was strong, and most of the time more mature than her age suggested. She tried to carry on as well. Even if sometimes Cardan caught her staring longingly at that spot on the living room where Jude used to sit and read his old books.

But even now, months later, it was hard for him to get up from bed sometimes. To wake up from a bad dream only to realize it was real, he was alone. Jude wasn’t coming back.

Some nights nightmares got worse, not because his mind created new scenarios. Quite the opposite, it revived his worst memory.

Hands touched his shoulders, probably seeking to comfort him. But he barely felt them. He barely heard the nurses enter the room after Jude’s pulse stopped.

He was aware of the uncontrollable way his chest shook between sobs. Pleading her to stay, to open her eyes just one minute more.

Of how he clutched her hand as if it would squeeze life back into her. He felt the softness of her hair as he caressed it, clinging to her the moment the doctors tried to pull him away. The nurse started to remove the wires.

He dreamed of his throat tearing apart as he roared them to let go of his wife. Later begging to allow him to hug her for a moment more. Just a second. Just a lifetime. Please.

Just a moment.

Cardan always woke between gasps those nights. Sometimes leading him to stay awake until morning, afraid to fall asleep again.

It was on days like that that he closed his eyes and let time rewind.

He returned to the year before, to the mornings when they decided who prepared breakfast with rock, paper, scissors games.

To years before that, when still half asleep he reached for her and curled his arms around Jude’s swollen belly. Barely weeks away from welcoming their baby.

To the day when he’d held his girlfriend in his arms and waited for her to open her eyes to finally ask her to marry him.

He knew he shouldn’t. In fact he was sure Jude would beat his ass for doing it. But sometimes he just wanted to feel her close only for a couple of minutes more. Some days he refused to accept she was not there anymore.

A loud crash startled him, bringing Cardan back from his daydreaming. He sat up to look at the clock and frowned. It was still early for Ivy to be awake.

He got up and walked to the kitchen, only to find the floor covered in white flour and his daughter on the opposite side with the face of someone that just got caught with a hand in the jar of cookies.

“Ivy, what are you doing?” He asked. Gods, there was a mess. His mental energy didn’t want to deal with it at the moment.

“I...” She darted her gaze to the right, the same thing Jude did whenever Cardan found her doing something she wasn’t supposed to.

He crossed the space, to crouch next to her and started picking things up with an exasperated sigh.

She let out a breath in defeat and murmured. “I was trying to make the muffins.”

“The muffins?”

“The muffins mom cooked for us every Christmas.” Ivy said as if he’d missed the most obvious thing.

Fuck. He looked at the calendar hanging on the wall behind him. December 24th. Fuck, fuck. How had he overlooked the date? They’d received an invitation to celebrate Christmas with their friends and another one from Jude’s family. He had intended to answer back.

“Oh honey…you needn’t.” Cardan turned back to her and took her little hand between his.

“I know. But I wanted to cheer you up.” Ivy’s voice was low. “You’re sad all the time, dad… I thought... maybe mommy’s muffins would help.”

A pang of guilt stung in his chest. Fuck, he tried so hard to keep his emotions at bay around her. Washing his face with frozen water hoping it would take away the redness around his eyes. He swallowed the lump in his throat and opened his mouth but no words came out so he just pulled his child into a tight hug.

“I’m so sorry, I-”

“Don’t be,” She interrupted him, clinging to his neck. “I miss her too.”

Blinking back the tears, he pulled back to cup her cheeks. “There is nothing that cheers me up more than you, sweetie. You know that right?”

Ivy’s chocolate eyes shimmered as she nodded.

Cardan took a deep breath and pulled her up so she was sitting on top of the counter. “Now, you know I suck at cooking those infamous muffins,” He grimaced. Ivy chuckled and bit her lip, totally not denying his statement. “So how about if instead of those, I prepare you my ultra special pancakes?”

Her gaze widened. “With whipped cream and fruit??”

He nodded. The excited squeal of his daughter warmed his heart in that unique way only she could achieve.

With Ivy’s help, the pancakes were made in little time. Even if all she did was jump around the kitchen singing Christmas carols.

Just as he was about to serve the table, she stopped him. “Dad, can we go eat breakfast with mommy?”

Cardan paused, not sure if he’d listened correctly. “With mommy?”

“Yeah, you know, like those days when we went out on picnics.” She said. Excitement floored from every single one of her pores. “She loved Christmas, I’m sure she’ll be glad to see us too!”

He wanted to say no, not knowing if he would make it. It’s too soon, the words hug there in the tip of his tongue. But looking at Ivy and her puppy eyes, he couldn’t.

Covered in scarves and warm coats they arrived at the cemetery. It was a beautiful place, if he was honest. Tall trees and some flowers grew along, giving it the appearance of a valley despite the cold weather. It looked so peaceful. Even if snow covered some parts of it.

Cardan carried a bag filled with the food and a blanket to use as tablecloth. Ivy played with the snow as they walked, and gasped at the sight of her mother’s tombstone. Letting go of Cardan’s hand, she ran towards it. A big smile shining on her face.

He stopped meters away from it, unsure of his decision. His heart hammered on his chest and he could see the steam formed by his shaky breathing.

Ivy turned and motioned him to come closer.

As he approached, he heard the cheerful chatter of his daughter, making him frown.

“...so I tried to be as quiet as possible, but then the flour fell!” She laughed and darted her gaze to him again. “That’s why daddy caught me, right dad?”

Cardan hesitated. “Uh, yeah… that’s when I found you covered in powder.”

He peered at the marble figure, intentionally avoiding the picture under the letters forming her name.

After setting the food they ate. Ivy barely chewed her food between words, since she was deeply invested in whatever conversation she was having with her mother. Cardan just listened. She spoke about her school, her exams with almost perfect grades. About aunt Liliver announcing she and uncle Van were expecting a baby, a thing Ivy wasn’t so sure to like since that would probably remove her from ‘the favorite’ position. She talked about the blanket forts Cardan taught her to build and the new books he’d read to her. Occasionally, she would laugh as if she’d listened to something incredibly funny.

They built a snow castle with the few snow that was gathered around, at least before Ivy accidentally threw a snowball to his chest. The snowball war that unleashed after had them growling and squealing for several minutes. It ended up with both of them lying down on the blanket, tired and giggling.

He sat up to ruffle her hair and sighed. “It’s time to go, little one.”

Ivy whined. “So soon?”

“We can return some other day…” That lit her face back up. “But your aunt Lil invited us to a party today. Do you want to go?”

She yelped. “With Christmas gifts?”

“Yeah.” Cardan winked.

Once everything was back in the bag Cardan started walking, but a tug on his sleeve stopped him.

“Aren’t you going to say goodbye to mommy?”

He didn’t answer.

“C’mon dad, go. I’ll wait for you over there.” She signaled a big space where rocks made an odd figure. That said, she was gone.

Haltingly, Cardan turned back to face the tombstone.

Air seemed to have flown out of his lungs. What was he supposed to say? He looked down and shuffled his foot in the snow. His grip tightened around the bag’s handle.

He used to spend the nights thinking of all the things he would’ve liked to say to her. But as it was, all of them apparently had vanished into the air. Should he say he loved her? That everything was okay?

“I hate you.” Was what came out. Cardan scoffed and swallowed. That was definitely not what he was thinking. “That is a lie. But I guess you already know it, don’t you?”

“Sometimes I wish I could hate you though... Maybe it would make it easier. Because sure as hell it’s not.” His voice was hoarse. “I’m trying. I promised you I would but… I miss you all the fucking time, Jude. I can’t go to bed at night without thinking you’re not there by my side anymore.”

He paused and rubbed his eyes. Cardan flashed quick glances to Ivy, trying to find the strength. But once he faced Jude’s picture again, the pressure on his chest was nearly unbearable.

“Everyday something happens that I would like to tell you. When Ivy or any of our friends do something I find hilarious I turn to make sure you saw it too just to find an empty space and I… I hate it.”

“I hate not being able to hug you, I hate not feeling your hands playing with my hair in the morning. I hate not being able to tell you everyday how much I still love you. I hate that Ivy notices how much I struggle with it. I hate not being as strong as you were.”

He spilled the words so fast they were probably intelligible, but he didn’t care anymore.

“Ivy… she’s an amazing little girl, you know? Everyday she does something new that is clever, or brave… and she reminds me so much of you.” A sob broke through him. He turned to look at her, auburn curls bouncing everywhere. Taking a steadying breath he brought back his gaze to the tomb.

“I just hope she’s not as good with lies or I will be totally screwed.” He let out a low chuckle. “You should be proud of her.”

Before he could say something else something warm spread down his shoulders to his arms and chest. If he was drunk he would say it resembled the feeling of a hug. The pressure on his chest slowly disappeared as tears rolled down his cheeks.

Not knowing exactly how or why, a weight on his shoulders he hadn’t realized he had, was gone from a moment to another.

“I love you, Jude Duarte.” He breathed. “You will have my heart always, and when this life ends I’ll find you again to give it to you once more.”

Giving a final look to the picture he’d been avoiding since they arrived, he gave a weak smile, wiped the tears away and turned to go find his daughter.

“Goodbye, my sweet villain.”

A Christmas party with his family (because that’s how he considered his friends), awaited. He found Ivy marching on top of the rocks, claiming it was a conquered fae castle and she, the new Queen. He chuckled and motioned her to return.

As they walked back to the car, she grabbed his hand and gave him a knowing look. Even when you can’t see me, I will be with you always.

The next morning when he opened his eyes the empty spot was still there. But for the first time in months, he welcomed the memories of his Jude with a longing smile.

----------------------------

Tags: @sweetlyvillainous @slightlyrebelliouswriter23 @aesthetics-11 @thesirenwashere @jurdanhell @demydreamer-otaku-and-book-lover @nightbringer @b00kworm @mysweetvillain @jurdannet @thefolkofthefic @yafandomsdotnet @vanessa172003 @booksandothersecrets @thewickedkings @ireallyshouldsleeprn @fuzzypineapples (tumblr couldn’t find your profile to tag you hun sorry! ☹️ )

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#jurdan #jude duarte #cardan greenbriar #tfota #holly black #jurdan fanfic #angsty jurdan #angst #tcp #twk #tqon #qon #the cruel prince #the folk of the air #judecardan #jude x cardan #tess writes

199 notes · View notes

jimlingss · 4 years

Text

Sugar and Coffee [3]

Chapter 2 - Chapter 3 - Chapter 3.5 OR Chapter 4

➜ Words: 3.5k

➜ Genres: 99.5% Fluff, 0.5% Angst, Pâtisserie school!AU

➜ Summary: It isn't hard to be a pâtisserie chef, but it's not a piece of cake either. It seems like for you in particular, life keeps throwing in one wrench after another. It always finds ways to make your sweets bitter. The cherry on top is Jeon Jungkook — a rival with a sensitive sweet tooth who always finds ways to complain about you.

cr.

Jungkook didn’t know this is how his night would turn out. The cold night air bites at his skin, turning his cheeks rosy. His finger presses the button and there’s clinking and clanking before the aluminum can comes rolling at the bottom slot of the vending machine. He takes it from the slot and walks over to the wooden bench. “Here.” You’re sniffling, your entire body jolting as you do so. You take the cold grape soda with both hands, and hold it in your lap. He hopes you like it — he saw you drinking grape soda once back in high school. Slowly, Jungkook takes a seat beside you. It’s terribly awkward for him, and he’s not sure what to do. The sounds of your sniffling shatters the silence of the night. “You know….” He clears his throat. “People always break up with their first girlfriends or boyfriends.” Jungkook steals a glance at you. Tears are still slipping from your tear ducts, shedding down the apples of your cheeks. “And, uh, first loves don’t usually last. Even if it did, the divorce rate is pretty high, so, um, uh...yeah.” Your sniveling is violent as if you’re trying hard to keep it at bay. He scratches the back of his neck, mind scrambling for ways to comfort you. “You either get married or break up, so I guess he didn’t see you as the marriage type.” It’s the shittiest advice ever. Jungkook is at least self-aware enough to know just how bad his attempt at consoling you is, but it tumbles out of his mouth anyway with the half of the brain cell he has left. “You guys weren’t that great of a couple anyways—” You burst out crying. Again. This time the sobbing is louder, harder. Uncontrollable. It makes Jungkook look in all directions to make sure no one’s here lest they call the police and accuse him of harming you somehow. “I...I love him!” you manage to say past your sobs, voice breaking in the process. It’s heart wrenching, though nothing but the truth. In this second, you’re so utterly vulnerable that it makes him entirely uncomfortable. “I l-love Jin. S-s...so m-much.” You’re shaking with gut-wrenching sobs. Grief pours out in a flood and salt water creeps from your eyes. You whimper, “I thou—ght I was going to m-marry him, J-J-Jungkook.” The boy beside you doesn’t like the way you call his name, how you’re crying when you say it, how you’re blubbering. “Next month was supposed—….supposed to be our...two year anniversary.” Jungkook has the urge to wipe off the flour stain on your forehead. But as he contemplates if he should or shouldn’t, he loses his opportunity. You tilt your chin to look at the sky, stain out of way as tears spring free down your cheeks. You sniffle, “I really, r-really love him.” Jungkook leans in. He wraps his arms around your shoulders. He pulls you in close and hugs you tight. He doesn’t know what he’s doing, but this is probably the least he can do. What his intuition tells him to do. He feels you tremble against him until you stop. “W-what are you doing?” “Umm…” “Get off of me,” you spit at him half-heartedly and he lets go as if he’s burning you. You’re back to sobbing again. Jungkook is at a complete loss. You were better as a bitch or at least easier to handle. It’s horrifying when you’re crying.

The cake burns in the oven. Jungkook can see the smoke curling into the air. He can smell it as it singes off his nose hairs. And he takes it out with mitts, coughing and wheezing, throwing the charcoaled tray on the kitchen counter. He turns to the person responsible. “Were you not watching it?!” “Fuck you, Johnson.” “Why didn’t you set a timer?!” “Why didn’t you?!” “Because I wasn’t the one who put it into the oven!” He shouts, “Are you an idiot?!” You’re looking at him what that infamous frown — those lopsided lips, that knot between your brows that makes your anger tangible. He watches the way you open your mouth to retort...but the hesitation is visible. And in shock, he then watches the way your expression crumples. His gut feeling tells him this isn’t right. He steps back. But then it happens. You start to cry — Jungkook freezes, eyes as big as saucers. Your head knocks forward, tears drip to the floor. You’re so small. He’s never seen you like this before. Jungkook’s never seen you so vulnerable before. “H-Hey, Y/N. C’mon….” His hands come out, but they don’t touch you. He doesn’t know what to do, he doesn’t know how to make it stop. He is powerless. “I’m sorr—” Jungkook’s entire body jolts. His eyes rip open into the night. He’s woken up in a pool of his own cold sweat. Oh god. Thank fucking christ it was only a nightmare — he’s still traumatized for life. The boy sighs, running a hand over his face and through the damp strands of his hair. He twists and turns, trying to return back to sleep, but he’s unable to. Eventually, his hand reaches for his phone on the nightstand. 5:42 am. Jungkook: hey 5:42 am. Jungkook: u ok??? 5:58 am. Jungkook: so when should we meet up for napoleon again Hours later, it says you’ve seen the message, but you never answer him. You leave him on read.

It’s been a few days — how many, you’re not so sure. You’ve been binging on ice cream and fudge brownies. The area near your mouth is stained with chocolate and crumbles of the treats. You haven’t showered in a while, or got up for that matter. It just feels better when you can pull the covers over your head and go through pictures of you and Seokjin on your phone. Photographs of ice-cream dates, that time you went to an amusement park together, your high school graduation, the fairy lights you saw on Christmas, the beach during summer break, the movies during Spring break…. All of them. You look through all the pictures, from the blurry ones of him holding you close to the ones where you’re pouting as he leans down to plant a kiss on your cheek. You miss Jin so much it hurts and you always end up crying again when you play back the videos — sobbing underneath the lump on your mattress. You’re glad you don’t have a roommate who can hear you crying day and night. You remember the first time he asked you out, the first time he held your hand, the first time you kissed. It’s all fresh on the forefront of your mind, and you’re left wondering what you did wrong, where things took a turn and you didn’t even notice. And you lay like that until you can’t cry anymore, until there’s no more pictures to see for the tenth time, until you reach the end of your years of text messages going back and forth. That’s when you see Jungkook’s text and you’re reminded that you can’t just lie around. You need to get up, go to school. You paid a lot for it and you have midterms — you can’t leave him waiting. Having no one to turn to, you dial his number. It rings thrice before it picks up. “Hello? Y/N?” “Hey.” You can’t recognize your own voice. It’s thick and crackly, making you wince. “Sorry. I...called.” “No, it’s okay. It’s okay, trust me. Um, are you, uh, alright?” “I don’t know,” you answer honestly and peel back the covers just a bit. “I just wanted to let you know, I still remember the midterm, so…” “Yeah, I know, t-take all the time you need.” “Okay.” It goes silent. “That’s it. I should go now.” “Right. I should probably go too. Take care of yourself.” The call ends. At least you still have a reason to get up. // Even if your mind is slowly preparing itself but your body isn’t, you have to eventually lug yourself up anyhow to get food when your supply of brownies and ice-cream runs out. It’s a miracle how you can just go on autopilot — that you can walk to the dining hall while brain dead, that you can go forward when your bones and muscles are numb to movement. You grab a tray and haphazardly scoop a ladle full of soup into your bowl. But when you turn away to find a seat, you come face to face with the worst of it, having forgotten this would happen. You catch sight of Moonbyul and Sandeul at a table, but there’s no way you can approach them. They’re not your friends. Not anymore. All of your friends were Jin’s friends. He introduced you to them — and they know him better and longer than they know you. It is undoubtable that they would choose him. You’ve lost everything. You have no one. Your hand tightens on the edge of the tray, looking for an empty table, searching for a spot where you can sit and quickly eat. Then you suddenly hear a call of your name— “Y/N!” Turning around, you discover Jungkook standing up from the cafeteria bench with his arm raised in the air. You approach hesitantly in five strides. “Hey….” All his friends are staring at you. One that you recognize as Jimin, another as Taehyung, one that has sharp features and striking looks and the other sleepy with cat-like eyes. “Ummm…” “You can sit here.” Jungkook moves his friends’ trays out of the way, gesturing for them to scoot over. They look at him like they’ve gone crazy. “T-Thanks…” You take him up on the offer, not wanting to reject him and make it more awkward. They continue to gawk at you, and Jungkook has that sympathetic gaze of his. You know you look like a mess — you haven’t run a brush through your hair, the underneath of your eyes are red from rubbing, your nose is dripping, and your spoon trembles as you bring the soup up to your lips for a sip. “Uh, this is Jimin, Taehyung, Yoongi, and Hoseok.” “Nice to meet you,” you croak after clearing your throat. “We’re in introductory cakes and decorating techniques together,” Taehyung chirps with a grin. “Yeah, I know.” You try to smile and look over at Jimin. “And we’re in fine pastries together, right?” Jimin nods, not uttering a single word. The awkwardness is tangible. The man named Yoongi sucks up his soda noisily and then pops his lips off his straw. “Is your boyfriend not here toda—ow! What the fuck, dude.” Jungkook’s doe eyes look back at his friend’s. “What.” “Don’t play dumb, you just stepped on my damn foot—” “Hey, is that all you’re eating?” Jungkook points his fork at your meager bowl of soup. Then he moves a bowl of fruit from his tray to yours. “Eat this. You like fruit, right? It’s good for you.” You stare at it and pierce the strawberry to chew it in your cheek. Jungkook smiles when you move the honeydew off the bowl onto his plate. He eats it. “So when do you want to meet up again?” “Tomorrow.” “Okay, sounds good.” Eventually, you finish your meal and mumble something about having to go to your locker. You bid them farewell and Jungkook waves with a brightened smile. All five of them watch your backside becoming smaller. Then once you’ve disappeared, Yoongi, Hoseok, Jimin and Taehyung turn to Jungkook and wait for an explanation. He looks back at them. “What?” “Don’t ‘what’ us. The fuck was that.” “Since when did you become buddies with Y/N?” Yoongi inquires, curious as well to the sudden change that almost gave him whiplash from sheer shock. “Okay, first off, we’re not buddies. She’s just going through some shit, so I’m trying to be a decent human being.” They continue to eye him and Jungkook sighs, putting down his utensil. “Jin dumped her.” “Oh shit.” Hoseok exchanges a look with Jimin. Taehyung’s jaw is slack. “Damn, that makes a lot more sense.” “Yeah, so don’t talk about him, dumbass,” Jungkook says pointedly to Yoongi. “Hey, I didn’t know! Don’t put the blame on me.” Hoseok asks, “When did it happen?” “I don’t know, like a few days ago.” The dark-haired man leaves out the part where you were crying. They don’t really need to know that detail and he has no plans of making a spectacle out of you. Taehyung leans in closer, too nosy for his own good. “Why?” “How the hell would I know? Ask if you want to know that badly.” “Nah, it’s no wonder though. She looks pretty bad.” Jungkook muses the same and he can only hope you’re holding up well — if not for your own sake then for the sake of the midterm. // Another day comes and goes, a sunfall and sunrise, and you find yourself knocking at Jungkook’s door. You didn’t know the weekend was so long. It feels long when you have no one to see, no one with you, nothing to do. Even after a full week has passed, you don’t feel better or close to it, but you know logically it’s better to get up and at least do something productive. You have some self awareness to know that rotting in your bed would be a pathetic way to die. The door swings open. The boy’s eyes are rounded. It occurs to you that you never realized just how brown his eyes are. “What are you doing here?” “I...thought we could meet up early. I don’t really have anything to do, so…” “How’d you know this is my room?” Jungkook peeks down the hall as if he could catch the person who exposed him like this, but there’s no one. “I asked the front.” “Oh.” “Can I….” “Sure.” Jungkook widens the door without thinking of the consequences and you step in. It looks like a tornado took a turn here. His belongings are scattered and in disarray, clothing hanging off the back of his chair and dumped on the floor like there was a Black Friday sale. Jungkook follows your line of sight and laughs stiffly. He picks up his briefs by your foot. “I’m usually not this messy, I swear. I’ve just been too busy to clean—” The man pales and jumps on his bed when he notices what you’re staring at. He tries to cover up his IU posters with his hands and his body, but to no avail. “These aren’t mine! They’re just up temporary cause, they were, um, gifts from my mom. I was a fan of her back in the day! But not anymore! Don’t make fun of me…” The entirety of his wall above his bed is posters of IU from back in her debut days to her most recent comeback. He has a shelf of all her albums lined up in a row with her official lightstick too. They don’t seem dusty at all. You take your eyes off of them, not uttering a single comment. Jungkook realizes you’re not going to tease him and gets off his bed awkwardly. He continues to pick up after himself, throwing his used clothes in the laundry basket. His eyes flicker up to you. “Wow, not even trying anymore, huh?” he jests, trying to lighten the mood. “Your outfit’s ugly.” You look down, self-consciously tugging on the hem of your oversized sweater. It’s a taupe hoodie that goes to your knees. “It’s Seokjin’s.” “O-oh. I, uh, mean you smell bad.” Jungkook laughs by himself and grabs his Febreze off his nightstand. He sprays the expanse of your body. It smells like fresh linen. He stops after five seconds when it occurs to him you’re standing motionlessly — when it hits him that you’re not going to smack the head of his side like he expected you to. Jungkook puts the Febreze back on the table and clears his throat. “I’ll be ready in two minutes.” You’re freaking him the hell out. No matter how much Jungkook tries to banter with you or pick an argument, you remain quiet. // Even if you’ve gone mute, your baking abilities are luckily still intact. Jungkook works quietly alongside you and helps you assemble the cake. After two strenuous hours, the product is put in front of the two of you. At first glance, the presentation is acceptable, but taste is another thing. He cuts into the cake and eats. You wait patiently for his reaction. Jungkook’s brows wrinkle. “Ugh, god.” He sets his fork down. “It’s so bitter.” Your cakes are usually too sweet that it hurts his teeth — now it’s not sweet enough. “Did you add any sugar?” “You kept complaining I add too much,” you murmur dejectedly. “Yeah, but you have to add some, Y/N. It’s not enough now. Here. Taste it. It’s disgusting.” He gives you a tasting fork and you take a bite. After a thoughtful chew and swallow, you look at him impassively and shrug. “Tastes fine to me.” “What?” Afraid he’s gone absolutely crazy, Jungkook takes another big bite. This time, his entire mouth dries and his tongue shrivels. It’s bad enough that he hisses, “It’s bitter.” “I can’t taste it,” you mutter apologetically, eyes on the floor. “I think it’s because my nose is plugged.” “How are you supposed to bake if you can’t taste?” Jungkook sighs in frustration. All your efforts for the past two hours have gone down the drain. You’ll have to start again, making it once more. But— “What’s the point?” you ask him, shoulders slumped and your entire form drooping in on itself. “What?” “What’s the point?” you whisper to Jungkook. “We either do well or we fail, but it’s not like it’ll matter. We’ll still pass the class and we’ll move on. And we’ll graduate and work, and then die a few years from now. It’s not like this’ll significantly change our lives. What’s the point if we make it well or not. What’s the point of worrying about it.” Jungkook is utterly mortified at your sudden despair. “Don’t you want to do well?” You shrug. He doesn’t know who this is — who you are — what you’ve become. This isn’t the Y/N that he knows. “Can you stop moping?” Silence. “You’re not helping yourself by being miserable,” Jungkook says sharply. It pisses him off that you’re so pathetic, that all it took for you to become so small was a mere breakup. He can’t fathom that his rival has been reduced to this. “There’s worse things out there. It’s not like you’re dying.” It remains quiet. He doesn’t know what he has to do to squeeze some kind of living response from you. “You’re alive and you’re still here. How much longer are you going to be like this? We have things to do!” Jungkook shouts, throwing his fork into the sink overflowing with dishes and bowls he has to wash as a result of your blunder. And it still seems like you don’t care. “I don’t get why you’re so sad. Jin isn’t even that great. He dumped you. So what? You move on! You get over it!” You sniffle. It snaps him back. Jungkook comes crashing down to reality. He watches the way you put your hands to your face and he realizes you’re crying again while nodding. God. He didn’t mean for it to come out like that, for him to sound like such an asshole. “I’m...sorry,” you whimper, words muffled behind your hands. “I just...I’m t-trying.” He sighs for the nth time. Guilt overwhelms him. “No, I didn’t mean it like that.” Jungkook gently tugs on your strand of hair that falls in front of your face. His voice softens. “I’m sorry, Y/N.” You nod, wiping your eyes away with your hand. “I just r-really want to go home and pull the covers over my head and pretend it never happened.” “I know.” He really doesn’t. Part of him still doesn’t understand. Jungkook can’t comprehend what was so great about Kim Seokjin that has you so devastated, but he tries his best to empathize. “But we can’t do that, can we? We just gotta...keep going. And it won’t be too hard cause it’s not like you have to do this on your own, right? Cause I’m here…..and you’re here, and all…” He’s bumbling, tripping over his own tongue and cringing over his poor attempt at comforting you. But you look up at him with glossy eyes and he lets go of your hair. With no one else to turn to and no one that you can confide in, you manage a small nod. You choose to believe him.

#bts fanfic #bts scenario #jungkook fanfic #jungkook fluff #jungkook scenario #bts reader insert #jungkook x reader #Y'ALLLLL

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bts-ficrecs · 4 years

Text

Namjoon angst fic recs (no smut)

@ephyra16 asked:

Hey...! Your blog is of so much help to me, thank you for all the hard work you do... I wanted to ask if you know any long Namjoon oneshots or series which mostly have angst but no smut...? Namjoon centered fics are really hard to find. Thanks!!

yes hello for some reason tumblr hates me and idk why everything gets wonky when i try to answer asks so i’m making a new post <3

1) as a jin stan i feel u. is hard to find fics for our mans but that just means when we find one we devour it and cherish it 4 ever lol

2) jsdflajsd you might have more luck asking someone else for straight up angst cause i can barely stomach angst LOL. I tried my best to find some heart breaky fics for you! :”) A majority of these I have not yet read so we will both be riding the emo train together.

As you requested, most of the oneshots are long fics, over 5k but! There are several honorable mentions under 5k are also listed cause they’re great

Thank you for your patience and I’m glad you’re enjoying the fics I reblog! :D so many great stories out there. as always, if there’s a fic that any of you readers think should be on this list lmk!! 🧡🧡 Enjoy!~

A Little Bit Of Sugar by @lthyl

Summary: Namjoon is well aware that some, well actually most people could find his hobby not exactly common, yet he still considers himself to be a man of tasteful words and higher intellect - someone who managed to understand the true, deepest meaning of beauty itself. And so he doesn’t really care if his methods of collecting pretty things end up being darker that expected, once you peek under the surface.

Almost Love by @joonary

Summary: You think you’ve got your life all figured out—after all, you found your soulmate already, and you’re lucky enough to have found him in your childhood best friend. You suppose that maybe, now that you’re older, your luck has begun to run out.

Better To Have Loved by @rkivenamu

Summary: Love, Namjoon had found, wormed its way though people, consumed them whole until it left nothing of the people they had once been. It became a weapon to be used to wound the other. Love, it seemed, was the worst thing that had ever happened to him.

Bloom by @hobidreams

Summary: Family is who you kill for. Who you die for. In this society, you and your kin are shadows, clinging to the darkness to obey orders absolute. But when such orders command you to abandon what little honor remains for wealth and notoriety, you find yourself lost in lonely uncertainty about the only vocation you’ve ever known. That is, until you meet a man with gentle hands, a poet’s heart, and a love for coaxing the world into bloom.

Note: okay, this has smut (there are 2 smut scenes) but… it is too good for me to not add to this list

Breathless by @personawife

Summary: Jungkook was eleven when it had begun. At first, he didn’t realize what was happening to him when he had miraculously coughed up a flower petal. He thought that maybe it had accidentally blown into his mouth with the wind, but then he realized that there were no cherry blossom trees around his house.

Pairing: Namjoon x Jungkook

Catching Fire by @namjoonchronicles

Summary: “If you didn’t want to go, then you should have told me. I wouldn’t have taken you here.”

Cut by @chimchimsauce (>5k)

Summary: Namjoon always hated soulmates.

Chasing Perfection by @shuaffeine-rkive

Summary: Kim Namjoon is the only kid in AP Bio that is smarter than me, and I will make it a point to destroy his perfect record.

Emancipated by @imagniation

Summary: CEO!Namjoon is a hero time and time again when your father takes the villain role.

Five Times by @lordofassgard

Summary: Five times you wished you never met Namjoon.

Sequel (of sorts): Part 2 - Namjoon's POV

For All the Petals by @rosaetae (>5k)

Summary: A story in which you met him in the spring, fell in love with him in the summer, but he left you in autumn and how you missed him in the winter.

Forget Me Not by @fairyjeons

Summary: She fell apart that day. An all white day with crowds of adoring friends and family to see them make the most happiest decisions of their lives, to choose to be together. She chose yes. He chose different.

Ghost In The Machine by @jimlingss

Summary: Kim Namjoon is your android that’s modified to become the best serial killer in all of existence. But when he starts to learn about humanity, he begins to threaten your goals.

God of Destruction by @jimlingss

Summary: Everything he touches breaks; except for you.

Jealous by @btssmutgalore (>5k)

Summary: Namjoon remembered the day you left clearly.

Lit Me Up by @floralseokjin

Summary: You find yourself becoming captivated by a mysterious, handsome author, but you may have bitten off more than you can chew…

No Goodbye by @floralseokjin (>5k)

Summary: Even if you’re the one who ended things, you can still feel pain. Your heartbreak is valid. Your sadness for the past is a grieving process…

Noble Gain and Loss by @jaeminlore (>5k)

Summary: You are a person of nobility preparing with your tutor for your royal debut. The two of you fall into a forbidden love.

Not The One by @personawife (>5k)

Summary: Maybe you should’ve realized early on then, that something was bound to go wrong. Meeting your soulmate at sixteen and living happily ever after? No one’s that lucky. But you refused to believe anything else.

Paracosm by @jimlingss (>5k)

Summary: Namjoon’s always known he was your second choice. He was a substitute for someone who wasn’t there. So when you’re on your deathbed, he intends to reconstruct your memories and remove your regrets.

Press Play by @out-of-jams

Summary: You didn’t mean to. Didn’t intend to fall in love with a dying man.

Submerged by @myfeelsinink

Summary: Kim Namjoon is the man of your dreams; or rather, from your dreams.

Suspended Soul by @justimajin

Summary: A silver ring, a live long promise, and an eternity of happiness. All of which, he had managed to break.

The what Ifs by @ellieljade (>5k)

Summary: You would be able to handle the relationship between Namjoon and your best friend if it weren’t for all those damned “what ifs”

Wishf-oo-l by @sseudanym (>5k)

Summary: To fulfill a good man’s bad dream.

Worshipers of the Soul by @jimlingss

Summary: The King of the Underworld was denounced and exiled from Heaven as a god. But with your help, he may rise to power once more and claim his rightful throne.

You’ve Got That by @mikrksmos

Summary: After making a life-changing decision for your career, you’re unsure of how exactly to bring it up to your boyfriend after your relationship and communication has not really been in sync. Namjoon is ready to take this relationship to the next stage, and he is sure that what he needs to ask you will be the solution to all the problems you have been having. Both know this next move is the right idea, but are unaware of how parallel those ideas really are.

Confirm Or Deny by @dinoyoongi

Status: complete series (6/6)

Summary: You’re a member of the rising group FRNZEE. You’ve been dating Namjoon for years when Dispatch releases an article exposing your relationship. Your company confirms the relationship. Big Hit denies it.

Deeper than Ink by @whoajeon

Status: discontinued series (2/?)

Summary: Should you fall in love with someone, even in the slightest, your skin becomes marked with vibrant colors that depict the story of your emotions. A tattoo, per say. However, should they or you fall out of love, the bright hues dull to black and the feelings you once had for each other melt away. To many, it’s a blessing to not have to live with the pain of your past. But what’s the point when you have too many reminders–say 27?

His Deaf Stars by @jooneos

Status: discontinued series (1/?)

Summary: When Namjoon turned 20 he had been excited to finally find his soulmate. He hadn’t anticipated that finding them would prove to be such a long journey. Now, more than 500 years later Namjoon still hadn’t found them.

Note: ok, yes it’s discontinued and only 1 part is up but still… please read it. It’s an interesting read regardless!

Inked by @kookswife

Status: complete series (6/6)

Summary: The day Namjoon entered your life was the day you were a bit more than utterly fucked.

Monster by @wordycerty

Status: ongoing series (1/?)

Summary: Namjoon as a vampire and you’re locked in a basement with him. For you to escape, he first needs to feed.

Noble Heart by @agustkive

Status: ongoing series (1/?)

Summary: Unrequited love can destroy anyone, and in a society where it could literally do so, it made it difficult to want anything more. Being among the population with Hanahaki disease, you battled with doing what you loved without actually feeling it. That is, until a new florist by the name of Kim Namjoon came into your life to remind you of what it actually felt like.

Reality by @thoughtssilent

Status: ongoing series (11/12)

Summary: Namjoon can’t deal with himself anymore, and to make things worse, BTS is disbanding.

Pairing: Namjoon x OT7

Regrets by @nightbts

Status: complete series (3/3)

Summary: When his eyes met yours, you felt your heart squeeze in your chest at the familiar brown eyes that you once used to know at the back of your hand. The very ones you’d wake up to every morning. The very ones that would gaze at you with so much affection as the words I love you spilled past his mouth during the most random moments of your day. It was him, your ex-boyfriend, the very Kim Namjoon.

Solanacea by @softjeon

Status: complete series (10/10)

Summary: There was something between them that neither could deny. It was like this from the first day they had met.

Pairing: Namjoon x Jimin

The Heiress’ Son by @jimlingss

Status: complete series (3/3)

Summary: Love is never enough. It could never feed you, protect you, stop death from taking you. It chains you down. It compels forgiveness unconditionally. It is dangerous. While it is the most intense of feelings, love is not enough and it will never be. Love never helped anyone.

What If I Said by @thoughtssilent

Status: complete series (3/3)

Summary: If no one is there for him, Namjoon won't be there for them. Or, a collection of sad stories.

Pairing: Namjoon x OT7

#namjoon angst #namjoon fanfic #bts fic recs #rm angst #bts angst #ephyra16 #g recs #g replies #f:knj

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mybunnyparadenme · 4 years

Note

Errr for the ship meme,,,,can we have 2 with bunny??? sry if i bother u i love your works!!

It’s no bother at all! Thank you for enjoying my works hehe, hope you’re ready for some angst!

2. things you said through your teeth

Everything was bathed in an unearthly neon glow, threads of blue-white electricity pulsing in the air sporadically. This was it, the heart of Professor Chaos' evil lair. Mysterion limped forward, his eyes locked on the only other person in the room with him. Chaos was standing with his back towards Mysterion, gazing up at a twenty foot tall super weapon that was almost ready to fire.

"Chaos, stop!" Mysterion shouted at him. His legs felt like they were going to collapse underneath him, but he willed himself to stay upright. He'd already come this far, fought too hard, to pass out now.

Chaos turned away from the machine, a wicked smile on his face. "I knew you wouldn't disappoint me. So glad you could make it to the end of the world, Mysterion!"

Mysterion shook his head, forcing himself to keep walking. "Turn off the weapon, Chaos. Thousands of people will die if you let that thing go off."

"That's exactly the point." Chaos said, looking at Mysterion like he was a child who needed everything explained to him. "It's a weapon of mass destruction, after all. You're in no shape to stop me, so just stand back and watch, okay?"

That wasn't going to happen. Yes, Mysterion was covered in injuries. And yes was struggling to keep standing. But he didn't need to fight with his fists. He had to appeal to the humanity that was still in side of him, buried underneath all the hate and anger.

"You're not a murderer, Chaos." He said, reaching up to pull his hood down. The smile on Chaos' face faltered for a moment, and Mysterion felt a spark of hope rise inside of him. "I know you. The thought of hurting others used to make you sick, remember? Shut the weapon down, you don't have to do this!"

Chaos scowled at him, balling his hands into fists at his sides. "You say you know me, but you're refusing to acknowledge that I want to do this! Working with Mitch Connors showed me that the world is full of monsters, and no amount of do-gooder bullshit is going to change that. This weapon is a mercy, Mysterion. I'm going to cleanse the world of its corruption, starting with that stupid little mountain town."

"Think about all the people who don't deserve to die like that, Chaos!" Mysterion said, desperation stealing away the deeper tone his voice took on when he was in costume. Panic clawed up his throat. His family was still in South Park, and half of the Freedom Pals had stayed behind to fight the Chaos Underlings that swarmed the town. Mysterion was their last chance, and he needed to get through to Chaos no matter what. "Those people deserve to have a chance to make the world better. Let them have a choice, please."

"It's kinder to let them die before the world ruins them." Chaos said, his voice devoid of emotion as he stared at Mysterion. "The weapon's almost ready to fire. You won't be able to get to me before I pull the switch."

No, no, NO. Chaos was turning away from him and Mysterion wouldn't be able to stop him in time. He ripped his mask off, letting his fear and sadness show openly in his eyes. "Don't do it Leo, I'm begging you!"

Chaos froze, electric sparks sizzling in the air around him as he slowly turned to face him again. His expression was full of rage, but there was something just underneath the surface there too, something that ached. His voice was shaky when he spoke, "I thought I told you never to call me that again."

"It's your name." Mysterion, no Kenny said as he took another step forward. He was almost halfway across the room. "Before you were Chaos you were Leo Stotch. You still are. And my Leo wouldn't fire that weapon, I know it."

"I'm Professor Chaos!" Chaos shouted, streaks of wild lightning shooting out in every direction, uncontrolled and deadly. Thankfully none of them managed to land a direct hit on Kenny. Chaos was glaring at him with raw hatred burning in his eyes. "Your ex-boyfriend doesn't exist anymore! There's only your enemy now, and it's high time I got rid of you!"

Kenny barely had time to dodge the arc of lightning that raced toward him, a black scorch mark burned into the space he had been in only a moment ago. He grit his teeth and forced his muscles to move despite the pain, to get him across the room and in front of Chaos as fast as possible. By some miracle he managed to make it a few feet away from the weapon without getting charred to a crisp, but Chaos was holding a crackling ball of white-hot electricity in his hands, aimed right at him. From this close there was no chance he would miss again.

"It's not too late for you to come back from this!" Kenny said, holding his hands out helplessly in front of him. Even if he couldn't block this, he wasn't going to give up yet. "You are not too far gone, do you here me? Come back to me, Leo. I love you!"

"No..." Chaos breathed, his hands trembling as he stared at Kenny. He shook his head, anger and disbelief warring on his face. "You're just saying that. You're... You're trying to trick me!"

"I'm not." Kenny said, hoping Leo could hear it in his voice how sincere he was as he took another step closer, now coming within arm's reach of him. "I swear I never stopped loving you, not even a little bit."

"What about all the times I tried to kill you, huh?" Chaos growled at him, the words coming out harsh through his teeth. "You're a liar, you hate me!"

Kenny remembered all the times Leo hadn't just tried to kill him, but succeeded. There wasn't any pain worse than being killed by the one you loved but still, he shook his head vehemently. "I could never hate you, Leo. Never."

"Shut up!" Chaos screamed. The electricity in his hands intensified for a heart stopping moment, then fizzled out into the air around them. He reached up and grabbed a large red handle, the switch that would fire all the energy gathered inside the weapon. "This is what's best for the world! I have to do this ! I... I have to..."

"Please." Kenny whispered as he reached up slowly, carefully, never taking his eyes off of Leo's. Their fingers touched, and the tension in his white-knuckle grip softened just a fraction. "There's always another way. Let it go."

What felt like an eternity of silence passed between them. This was it. This was the moment that everything would change, one way or another. Kenny swallowed hard, hoping that he'd done enough to save all the people he cared about, including Leo. There was no coming back if he pulled the switch, so he held his breath and prayed he'd done enough to save him.

Finally Leo's grip on the handle loosened, tears filling his eyes as he whispered, "Okay. I'll turn it off."

Relief flooded through Kenny's body, so strong he nearly collapsed. "Thank you."

Leo let go of the handle and pushed a button just underneath the switch. The weapon clicked and sputtered as all the energy gathered inside of it began to fade away. And just like that, the danger had passed, leaving only a harmless hunk of meta behind.

"I..." Leo murmured, starting at the once deadly machine in front of them. He backed away a few steps, his whole body shivering as tears began to roll down his cheeks. "What w-was I thinking? How'd I let everything get this far? M-Mysterion-"

Kenny closed the distance between them, wrapping his arms tight around Leo's shaking frame. Tears of his own started sliding down his face, and he had to bite back a sob when he felt a pair of arms wrap around him too. The two of them clung to each other tightly, crying so hard it was difficult to breath. They held each other like...

Well, like the world had almost ended.

"I'm sorry. I'm sorry!" Leo was crying, sounding small and scared and helpless. There weren't any traces of Chaos left in his voice, and it hurt to hear him sound so broken. He hadn't sounded like this for a very, very long time.

Kenny started to rub soothing circles on his back, his voice soft and reassuring. "Let it out, sweetheart I'm here. You're going to be okay, I promise. No matter what happens, I'll always be here for you."

"You should h-hate me." Leo said, his voice muffled against Kenny's shoulder. "Wh-Why don't you hate me?"

"Because you did the right thing in the end." Kenny pulled back just enough to look into his eyes. He reached up to take the helmet off Leo's head, revealing his beautiful, tear-stained face. Kenny leaned in and kissed the ragged scar over his eyelid, smiling when he heard Leo gasp softly. "Because even after all this time, you never stopped being my Leo."

#south park #sp bunny #bunny sp #butters stotch #kenny mccormick #my fics #answered #promptfic #south park fic #anon

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tsarisfanfiction · 4 years

Text

Melt V

Fandom: Thunderbirds Rating: Teen Genre: Hurt/Comfort/Angst Characters: Brains, Virgil Tracy, John Tracy, Alan Tracy, MAX

Part 5 of my entry for @gumnut-logic‘s SensorySunday: Smell. Part 1 | Part 2 | Part 3 | Part 4

Nope, this fic is not back on track at all. Thanks to Nutty for helping me with Virgil... although Virgil is also the reason we’re back off the rails again, so there’s that. This is my first time writing TAG!Brains (I have some TOS!Brains in a wip but his stutter is different, and there’s no MAX). It’s also always awkward writing the pov of someone smarter than me...

“I-It doesn’t make sense!” Brains declared to MAX, who whistled back at him sadly. His hands were shaking, and he curled them into balls. John’s call, interrupting some Thunderbird Three maintenance and potential upgrades, had been full of nothing but bad news. Scott hospitalised, Gordon heading home with broken bones, and all because one of their pods – a pod Brains had designed – had exploded on them.

Calculations whizzed past in front of him, all the variables and what-ifs of a HeliPod’s construction. Had he made a mistake? Was he sending the boys out with a ticking time bomb? Mr Tracy would never forgive him for such an error.

MAX whistled at him again, insisting that he hadn’t made a mistake, but he just shook his head at his creation.

“N-no, MAX. There m-must be an explanation. Thunderbird Five d-didn’t detect anyone e-else in the vicinity, s-so it must be an issue with the HeliPod.” But what? The schematics didn’t highlight anything out of the ordinary. Information streamed from Thunderbird Two on the exact makeup of that particular pod showed nothing odd, either.

He started again, back from the top. What was he missing? Nothing was coming up, all the calculations were perfect, assembly had gone without issue, no issues with any of the parts used. Nothing, nothing, nothing.

In the corner of the display, Scott’s suit telemetry taunted him. Another failure. He needed to look into that as well, find a way to improve its heat resistance. What if Virgil hadn’t been so close? HeliPods could go a long way from Thunderbird Two. Their suits were supposed to protect them. It had failed.

Was there a way to get neoprene to resist higher temperatures? Would he need to argue with Scott about replacing the fingerless gloves with full-cover like his brothers’? Scott had said he didn’t need them, that the extra dexterity made piloting easier, and Brains preferred not to clash horns with the eldest Tracy brother if he could, but he couldn’t let this happen again.

MAX whistled at him again, turning around in a circle before heading out of the room. His concentration broken by the sudden departure, Brains heard the unmistakable sound of Thunderbird Two returning to her hangar. He hadn’t heard Thunderbird One, but that wasn’t overly unusual when he was distracted by his work.

Thunderbird Two. Virgil.

He hurried to the hangar, arriving just as a stretcher bearing a bundled-up Gordon was offloaded. Alan was already there, bouncing up and down nervously at his brother’s side, but it was Virgil Brains needed.

“V-Virgil!” he called, running across the hangar and almost falling flat on his face.

“Can it wait, Brains?” the larger man asked, frowning down at his brother. “I have to get Gordon settled.”

“Do you have the H-heliPod?” he asked. Virgil’s face went dark.

“Buried under an avalanche,” he said.

“O-oh.” Brains needed that HeliPod. Calculations didn’t tell him what had gone wrong; he needed to see the actual remains and analyse them.

“Brains, I have to get Gordon sorted, then get back to the hospital. The HeliPod is not important right now,” Virgil said firmly, but Brains shook his head.

“N-no, Virgil. I n-need to see that HeliPod a-as soon as possible. U-until I can determine w-what happened to make it e-explode, I c-cannot allow any of y-you to use a-any of the p-pods.” Brains didn’t like arguing, let alone with Virgil, who was usually the calmest and most reasonable of the on-Earth Tracys, but this was important. Too important to wait. “I-I can take Thunderbird Two myself.”

“No!” Virgil snapped. “The site’s too dangerous.”

“Uh, hey, Virg?” Gordon interjected, making Brains jump. He hadn’t even realised the aquanaut was conscious. “You know you’ve got to go back anyway? Thunderbird One?”

“Thunderbird One can wait,” Virgil said stubbornly. “Sorry, Brains. You’ll have to do your assessments another way. We can’t retrieve the HeliPod.” He stalked away, towing the stretcher with him.

MAX whistled mournfully.

“I know, MAX,” he replied. “I n-need to see the remains t-to see what happened.”

“I’ll take you!” Alan appeared at his shoulder. “Come on, let’s find out what happened to my brothers!”

“ALAN!” Virgil roared. There was the sound of heavy boots pounding across the hangar floor, and Virgil was back in front of them, every inch the angry bear he could be when provoked. “Absolutely not. You are staying right here on Tracy Island with Gordon.”

“But… Scott will be happier if Thunderbird One’s back home,” Alan protested, poking the bear in a way Brains could never gather the courage to do. “And Brains is right! We have to know what happened to Scott and Gordon. What if it was the Hood?”

“Then we leave Kayo and the GDF to deal with it,” Virgil growled. “John is already in contact with them. Once Scott’s out of surgery, Kayo’s going to the site to see what she can find.”

“She’s going alone?” Alan gasped. “But- isn’t that dangerous?”

“Kayo’s trained for that sort of thing,” Virgil pointed out. “You are not.”

“But… but…” Alan started. “But if Thunderbird Two needs to go back to retrieve Thunderbird One anyway, why not go at the same time as Kayo?”

“Alan-”

“It’s in an avalanche zone, right? So if we wait too long, there might be another one and then Thunderbird One will be even harder to get!”

Brains refrained from mentioning that it was possible, if time-consuming, to construct a brand new, upgraded, Thunderbird One, and that the boys got unhealthily attached to their machines despite his warnings to the contrary. While it was true, it would do nothing except give Virgil another reason to not go back, and while Thunderbird One was replaceable, the information from the damaged HeliPod was not.

Virgil looked unimpressed, arms crossed and unmoving in the face of his youngest brother’s arguments. Brains feared that he’d need to hijack Thunderbird Two himself the moment Virgil was out of the hangar, but he was no pilot and certainly had no head for heights nor speed.

“Virgil,” he started, determined to argue his case one more time, but was interrupted by John appearing.

“Kayo thinks it’s a good idea,” the ginger said. “She says she’ll meet you there.”

“John-”

“It’s too dangerous for one of you to go alone to a live avalanche site,” John steamrollered. Brains didn’t often get to see John overriding any of his brothers, but even through the hologram and his limited understanding of fellow humans, he could tell that John was angry. “Brains is right. There is absolutely no sign of anyone else there on the ridge that EOS or Thunderbird Five can detect, but the HeliPod didn’t explode until they were out of your sight, which means that something is not right. None of the theoretical calculations Brains or I have run so far explain that, so we need to at least get detailed scans of the HeliPod, if not the physical remains.”

“I-”

“We’re looking at best case scenario, Thunderbird Two’s pods have a potentially fatal flaw, and worst case scenario, someone is actively trying to kill us – and came far too close to succeeding today. We need answers, Virgil, and we can’t wait for them. If you can’t leave Gordon, I’ll be down in fifteen minutes to take Thunderbird Two and Brains out myself.”

“John-”

“Thunderbird Two is going back there no matter what, Virgil,” John told him firmly. “The only say you get is who’s on board.”

Virgil looked furious, glaring at his brother’s hologram. Brains waited with baited breath, Alan alongside him, as a silent battle of wills took place between the second and third Tracy sons.

“I don’t like it,” Virgil said finally, his tone leaving Brains in no doubt that Virgil absolutely hated it. “But no-one’s piloting my ‘bird into an avalanche zone except me. And none of you are coming with me.”

“But Virgil-”

“Alan, you are going to stay right here with Gordon.” The blond pouted but nodded.

“T-take MAX,” Brains insisted, quietly relieved that he was banned from the flight. Thunderbird Two was magnificent, but like the other Thunderbirds had a tendency to make him sick. His robot whistled eagerly, bouncing on his wheels to show his enthusiasm for the idea.

Virgil surveyed him for a moment, brown eyes severe and obviously unhappy with the situation.

“Fine,” he caved, clearly realising that there was no additional risk to including a robot in the flight. “But I’m getting Gordon settled first. Alan, come on. And John?”

“Yes, Virgil?”

“If you’re not down here by the time I get back from the medical bay, I’ll drag you down myself.”

Brains strongly disagreed with that demand. Thunderbird Five had the most sophisticated computers in International Rescue, and would be crucial to the investigation.

“I’ll be there,” John promised. Virgil nodded and stalked back across the hangar with Alan in tow. Brains didn’t watch him go.

“But John!” he protested. “Thunderbird Five’s c-computers will be crucial in the investigation.”

“It’s fine, Brains. EOS can give us all the information we need,” John assured him. “If I don’t come down, Virgil isn’t going to go at all.”

“I-if you say so.” Brains was dubious, but there was nothing more he could do. “C-come on, MAX, let’s get you r-ready for the mountains.”

MAX gave an enthusiastic whistle and eagerly led the way back to the lab.

Refitting him didn’t take long, and soon he had MAX ready and waiting for Virgil in Thunderbird Two. Brains himself settled in his lab chair, his goggles settled comfortably over his eyes to show him everything MAX’s optical sensors transmitted.

Virgil took rather longer to appear, presumably awaiting John’s descent from Thunderbird Five before entering his launch chute, but he finally did so, greeting MAX cordially enough. Brains thought he seemed a little more settled with the idea and part of him wondered if his brothers had continued the conversation out of his earshot.

“Okay then, MAX, let’s go get Thunderbird One, and find out what happened to that HeliPod. Brains, you ready?”

“R.A.D.”

“Alright then.” The cargo transporter moved, trundling forwards onto the runway. Brains didn’t need MAX to look out of the window to imagine the launch ramp engaging itself; nor did he need the audio sensors to hear the rumble of the main engines igniting. “Thunderbird Two is go!”

Part 6

#sensorysunday #sensorysunday2020 #thunderbirds are go #thunderbirds are go fanfiction #tsari writes fanfiction #brains #MAX #virgil tracy #john tracy #alan tracy #gordon tracy #scott tracy #kayo kyrano #grandma tracy #eos #melt

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sweet-royalty · 4 years

Text

Never Been in Love

Summary: Patton is alone at home and is enjoying this time dancing and filling himself with pride (Extremely self-indulgent but at this point all my fanfics are like this and I have no shame at all so yeah xP)

Genre: Songfic (Will Jay, Marina and the Diamonds and Moses Sumney)

Word Count: 3371 words (9 pages)

Pairings (All of them are heavily mentioned but they are not the focus of the story): Queerplatonic LAMP, Romantic Analogince and Romantic Dukeceit

Content: Slight Angst w/ Comfort; Human!AU; Aro!Patton; Closeted Aromantic; Virgil, Roman and Logan are romantically dating and each one of them are Patton’s QPPs; Fluff; Just pure fluff despite many things; Sympathetic Deceit; Sympathetic Remus; Hoh!Deceit; Sign Names mentioned for 2 characters; Hoh experience written by someone who is not hoh (read as “please tell me if I’m doing something wrong”); Non White Sides;

Trigger Warning: Nudity (without sexual content or genitalia description), Snake mention, Amatonormativity (the characther is not actually arophobic, he just doesn’t know Patton is aromantic) (Tell me if I forgot to tag something)

Disclaimer: I couldn’t find a hand sign for “vitiligo” other than actually spelling it to make as Deceit’s sign name so his sign name in this story might not be so good. If you have any other suggestion for his sign name and explain how to sign it I’ll really appreciate it!

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“Don't you want somebody to never let you go? Knowing someone's body better than your own Don't you want a family with a white picket fence? Tell me when's the wedding, the names of all your kids” Will Jay – Never Been in Love

Being alone at home was always one of the best things that could happen for Patton.

Not because he doesn’t like his family but because he enjoys the freedom of being alone. And this time, the house would be all his for the whole day. His parents were taking his brother to see if they could fix his hearing-aid or buy him another one. And after that they would take him for a sleepover at the twins house and go out to celebrate their marriage birthday. It was simply P E R F E C T.

Patton noticed his brother walking in the room and sitting on the sofa in front of him while their parents were going back and forth taking everything they need. He knew what that meant. That’s usually what they do when they want to talk privately. Patton paused his music player and left the cellphone behind.

- Sorry about your hearing aid, D - he signed with a sad face.

The last sign made him sulk

- I adore when you call me like this - he said rolling his eyes when pointing his index and middle finger to the side and touching his heart so Patt would know he was being sarcastic. He giggled.

- Ok, can you teach me the s-n-a-k-e sign again, please?

D made a two with his fingers, pointing to Patton, brought his hand to his chin then lowered it with a zig-zag movement like a snake moving. He repeated the movement but instead of a two he rised his index finger and touched the other ones together forming a “d” with his hand.

He gave him the thumbs up. D’s love for snakes made him really happy for being given this sign.

- Don’t worry about my hearing aid - he showed his broken aid, hand painted as a snake – I’ll paint a new one if we can’t fix it

- What are you doing with this one then?

He shrugged then placed his index and thumb together under his nose and slid it on his upper lip before crossing his fingers. “Mustache” followed by “R”.

The sign he gave to one of the twins.

- Remus asked if I can give it to him if we can’t fix. Maybe he wants to open it? I don’t know

Patton smiled and gave him a malicious face.

- You will be cuddling with your boyfriend!

- Remus is not my boyfriend! - he sulked while grunting.

Patton tried not giggling too loud, since D could still hear something from his right ear.

- Ok, he’s your crush. I hope you’ll have fun

He rolled his eyes but didn’t say anything else to defend himself.

- You’re lucky you don’t have a crush. I’ll make your life a living hell when you do!

Patt snorted.

- Good luck

“… with that” he meant.

“I'm not missing someone that I've never met Maybe a little scared, still I don't care” Will Jay – Never Been in Love

Patton took some of his clothes off having just a baby blue long T-shirt covering his brown-skinned body, feeling the wind from the open window run through him. He spinned around the room and laid down to the sofa, grabbing his phone and scrolling to see if there were any new messages for him.

Roman (7:01 AM): Good morning~ Who is ready for today?

Virgil (7:02 AM): Ro, it’s 7 in the fucking morning

Virgil (7:02 AM): Lemme sleep

Roman (7:02 AM): I’m sorry, lil sunshine

Roman (7:03 AM): But if you actually were sleeping you wouldn’t be answering it!

Virgil (7:05 AM): Ooooor maybe I WAS sleeping but then a stupid bird sound woke me up!

Roman (7:05 AM): Not my fault if you sleep with your phone glued to your face!

Logan (7:05 AM): Can you stop bickering this early in the morning?

Logan (7:05 AM): We’ll be ready when the time comes, Roman. No need to rush.

Roman (7:07 AM): Oh my lovely nerd

Roman (7:07 AM): I meant to ask if you were excited

Roman (7:07 AM): Not if you were literally ready.

Roman (7:08 AM): The movie is only at 7 PM

Virgil (7:08 AM): I’m extremely excited, your highness

Virgil (7:09 AM): Now would you please stop texting here and let me sleep?

Roman (7:09 AM): As you wish, my love <3

Virgil (7:10 AM): -_- <3

Virgil (10:23 AM): Ok, now I’m up

Patton (10:30 AM): Good morning, my dears ^_^ <3

Patton (10:30 AM): Are you going to the movies today?

Virgil (10:33 AM): Sup, Patt

Virgil (10:35 AM): Yeah… I kinda won 3 movie tickets…

Virgil (10:35 AM): We’d call you but the movie isn’t really your type

Virgil (10:36 AM): I’m so sorry, Patt :( I didn’t mean to exclude you or anything…

Patton (10:36 AM): No no! I didn’t feel like this at all, love!

Patton (10:37 AM): Don’t worry! I’m happy that you’re goin out!

Patton (10:37 AM): Send me pictures of you once you meet, I wanna see your pretty faces <3 <3

Virgil (10:38 AM): Are you sure? :/

Roman (10:39 AM): Patt, you’re just as important as any of us. We don’t want to make you feel like a third wheel.

Logan (10:39 AM): Just because you’re not involved with us romantically that doesn’t make our platonic feelings for you less important.

Virgil (10:40 AM): Just tell us if something is bothering you, ok?

Roman (10:40 AM): Yes, if you want we can try to see each other earlier so even if you don’t go to the movie we can at least see each other

Logan (10:40 AM): Yes, we’d gladly do this for you

Patton’s smile got wider. He was being sincere when he said he wasn’t feeling excluded and he knew how genuine that invitation was because they all genuinely loved him as much as he did and in the same way he did.

As strong as everything he could feel.

They were the friends he never wanted to miss, they were the people he could always count for and know they’d do anything to help him just like he’d do anything for them and they didn’t need to be in love with each other for it.

Patton (10:43 AM): You’re amazing, loves <3 But really I’m not feeling like going anywhere today. D went out with our parents and I’ll be alone the whole day, I think I’ll spend this time with myself here at home ^_^ But I appreciate it, really. I love you so much ;u; <3

Roman (10:43 AM): Anything for you, my dear! Enjoy your day!

Virgil (10:43 AM): We love you, ok? We’ll make sure to include you next time.

Virgil (10:43 AM): Promise

Logan (10:44 AM): Tell us if you need something or change your mind

Patton (10:44 AM): I love you too <3 Don’t worry

Patton swiped the chat group off and searched for something to listen while baking some cookies

“I know exactly what I want and who I wanna be. I know exactly why I walk and talk like a machine I’m now becoming my own self-fulfilled prophecy” Marina and the Diamonds - Oh No!

Patton was mouthing the lyrics while scooping the cookie dough. His shoulders wiggling with the song’s catchy rhythm as he felt every beat controlling his body.

Patton didn’t really listen to Marina and the Diamonds so often but Roman successfully made him addicted to this song. Last time he came to sleepover they danced together the whole night and without noticing they were practically lip-synching this song, which was so amazing and powerful that Patton never left this rush go.

He turned the stove on, started the chronometer and just left the music flowing through his body

Patton twirled off the kitchen, the wind following his movements filling his legs with a chilling sensation that would only make his movements more and more powerful.

He was throwing his head back with his eyes closed, shaking it so hard that Patton could feel the curls of his hair touching his cheeks making him smile as bright as the sun.

That’s what he likes the most about being alone. As long as nobody could see he could be as cheerful, loud and expressive as he wants without any judgement. He could manage to make his entire body feel happiness and express it in it’s own way.

He could shake his as weird and as careless he wanted.

His thoughts were cut off by a loud ringing.

- Oops! Almost forgot my cookies!

“Oh yeah I'm tired of falling Oh yeah For someone else's story 'Cause he gets the girl and I get ticket stubs I guess it's time to write my own personal version of love” Will Jay – Version of Love

Patton (6:34 PM): Hey, Dee! Are you already at Remus and Roman’s house?

DD (6:40 PM): Hey there. Yeah, we’re watching the Saw movie for the 4th time this year -_-

Patton (6:40 PM): Wow…

Patton (6:41 PM): Why you never tell him you don’t like this movie?

DD (6:42 PM): No one likes to hear him beaming about the deaths and all the gore stuff.

DD (6:42 PM): And it’s funny to hear him laughing when that woman tries to reach the keys and ends up trapped

Patton (6:44 PM): Awwwww

Patton (6:45 PM): It’s cute that you do that just to see him happy

DD (6:50 PM): -___-

DD (6:51 PM): If you wanna see it this way

DD (6:55 PM): At least the movie don’t make me feel uncomfortable so it’s more bearable

Patton (6:56 PM): Yup

DD (7:00 PM): Hey, Patton

Patton (7:01 PM): Yes?

DD (7:02 PM): I think I’ll try to tell him tonight

Patton (7:05 PM): Tell what?

DD (7:02 PM): Don’t worry, I’m hidden in the bathroom. He’s not seeing our messages.

Patton (7:03 PM): Oh, ok!

Patton (7:04 PM): Well, good luck! ^^ I’m pretty sure things will turn out fine

DD (7:05 PM): I’m not worried about it

Patton (7:05 PM): Pfff

Patton (7:05 PM): Sure ;)

DD (7:06 PM): urgh

DD (7:07 PM): You should tell Roman too

Patton sighed. There we go again.

Patton (7:07 PM): D, I told you before. I’m not in love with Roman…

Patton (7:08 PM): He is my best friend, just like Logan and Virgil.

DD (7:08 PM): Well, I never said you were not in love with them TOO

DD (7:09 PM): Look

DD (7:10 PM): I know talking to mom and dad will be hard

DD (7:11 PM): It is hard for me too

DD (7:11 PM): But you don’t have to talk to them if you don’t want to

DD (7:12 PM): None of us have

DD (7:13 PM): I’ve always hid my relationships very well, and you know that

DD (7:13 PM): I can help you so they won't find anything out too

DD (7:14 PM): Or… Idk, protect you if they react badly about it

DD (7:14 PM): Just know that I’m on your side, ok?

DD (7:14 PM): I’ll never judge you for being who you really are

DD (7:14 PM): And polyamorous relationships usually go great

Patton didn’t know how to answer. It wasn’t the first time they talked about it.

No matter how many times Patton would say he’s not interested in anyone, D would try to say that he’s in love with Roman or one of his boyfriends.

Or act like he will be in love with someone someday.

But Patton highly doubted that and was pretty fine with it

Patton (7:15 PM): I know, D

Patton (7:15 PM): I love you

DD (7:16 PM): I need to go back now, I’ll talk to you tomorrow

Patton (7:16 PM): Good luck!

He never told his brother about being aromantic and all this talk actually makes him less inclined to do so. He knew he means well despite everything, so Patton never felt like yelling or fighting with him for insisting on it.

But at the same time…

He was so DONE.

It was already difficult for him to find out who he really is.

It was already a huge pain to see that the fact that he doesn’t feel OK with the idea of being romantically attached to someone. That this whole thing actually makes him feel sadder, empty and chained just by the simple thought of it because “that’s what everyone needs to feel”.

It was already difficult for him to see how he can explain his relationship with Logan, Virgil and Roman.

Yes, they were made for each other.

No, he never wants them to go away.

Yes, he loves them A LOT.

But his love was not romantic.

His 3 partners were dating each other romantically but they all see Patton as someone just as important in their lives, even if they don’t see him as a boyfriend.

When they found out about Queerplatonic Relationships it was like big realization and a good way to include Patton in their lives that was not just a simply “he’s my best friend”.

And that makes him so happy, special and wanted he didn’t need or wished anything else.

But it was almost like the whole world was revolved in romance and that was the only way for anyone to find happiness. Like not having a romantic partner meant you’d be “alone forever” as if that was the worst thing ever.

Patton was not alone.

Patton was not unhappy.

Patton was not repressing feelings anymore.

Patton was free. Patton was Patton.

And that was everything he needed.

Why wouldn’t anyone get this? Why was everyone so fixated on it? Why-

- No! – Patton murmured before eating one last cookie and getting up from the sofa and turning his TV off – I’m not letting this ruin my day. I’m gonna take a shower.

“Am I vital If my heart is idle? Am I doomed? … If lovelessness is godlessness Will you cast me to the wayside?” Moses Sumney - Doomed

Ok, maybe choosing this album to listen while taking a shower wasn’t a very uplifting choice. Not that his songs are bad. But they were not the type of songs for you to feel good, it’s more like a song to give you a relatable feeling. Something might make you say “yes, that’s what happens to me".

But the shower did gave him some good, since the cold water mixed with Moses’s voice echoing through the walls were relaxing and almost swooning, like meditating. Logan taught him how to fixate his thoughts in one single thing until he could slowly focus on the sensations of his surroundings and Patton particularly enjoyed doing this in the shower.

Patton threw his naked body in the bed and turned to see his own reflection in the mirror close to it.

He stared at his freckles, covering his entire brown body, and smiled as he remembered how Virgil made a small comment about how much he likes it because as a child he used to look at people with freckles and try to form constellations with them and it was like they have a little piece of the sky with them. That was the best “non-intentionally” cute comment he ever made.

He sat on the side of his bed and stared the mirror, giving more attention to his own details. He looked through his whole “galaxy body” passing some of his fingers through them, mentally picturing the whole sky moving around it. He never knew why but sometimes imagining things like this made him feel so good and at least for a second forget about everything else.

- Let’s see this galaxy dance.

He picked up his phone, chose the first song that came with shuffle mode and got up.

“You're vulnerable, you're vulnerable You are not a robot You're lovable, so lovable But you're just troubled” Marina and the Diamonds – I Am Not a Robot

This time he danced slowly and with his eyes closed.

His arms embracing his body and his movements had no shape or choreography.

It was just free and random.

Patton’s hands were running through his arms gently, like a self-cuddle, having this short moment to love himself.

He was moving his shoulders inclined his head behind and instead of just mouthing the lyrics, Patton allowed himself to actually sing.

He definitely was not.

He was a human being.

A lovely human being.

“It's okay to say you've got a weak spot You don't always have to be on top Better to be hated Than loved loved loved for what your not”

Later that night, now completely undercovers and almost ready to sleep, he received a photo from the chat group of Roman, Virgil and Logan in the cafeteria after watching their movie.

The image of the latino man and the black goth kissing each side of the ginger haired nerd made Patton smile fondly.

Patton (11:12 PM): Omg, you all look so adorable <3

Patton (11:12 PM): I’m happy you enjoyed your movie :3

Virgil (11:14 PM): Yeah, it was really cool

Virgil (11:15 PM): Logan and Roman wouldn’t stop geeking around it after the movie, they almost didn’t finished their meal

Roman (11:16 PM): Oh, come on! There were many things to think about after that

Virgil (11:17 PM): I’m not complaining, charming prince. It was cute seeing you theorizing things.

Roman (11:17 PM): UwU

Roman (11:20 PM): But hey! I guess we were not the only one who had a good movie night ¬u¬~

Roman sent a picture of his twin, laying on the living room’s couch, sleeping with his mouth open and his eyes slightly allowing to see his sclera as a short man with a small vitiligo around his left eye was sleeping on him with this arms embracing the rat man. Patton cooed upon the vision of his brother in such a lovely state.

Roman (11:22 PM): @Patton Morales blackmail? >:)

Patton (11:23 PM): Pffff come on, Roman. We both know none of us would do this xD

Roman (11:23 PM): Urgh, yeah you right…

Roman (11:23 PM): Ah to be a poor honest man, who loves his brother too much

Roman (11:23 PM): ú-ù

Virgil (11:25 PM): Say this for yourselves, I have no sympathy for those dirty little sinners

Roman (11:25 PM): omg VIRGIL!

Virgil (11:26 PM): Urrrrrrgh alright alright, I’m the one who’s not allowed to be a jerk. Sorry.

Roman (11:27 PM): I’m afraid some sins shall not be forgiven, sweet pudding… ú-ù

Virgil (11:27 PM): Tsc, fuck you then. I want my Nightmare Before Christmas DVDs back

Patton (11:27 PM): Omg, dears. Not this late at night xD

Virgil (11:28 PM): lol ok, Patt. Don’t worry, I was just kidding

Virgil (11:28 PM): I highly support your brothers

Virgil (11:29 PM): I love you all

Roman (11:29 PM): I love you too, storm cloud <3

Patton finished to curl up on his bed, hugging one of his pillows like a teddy bear and smiled to the phone screen with his lovely partners texts

Patton (11:30 PM): Hey, loves?

Virgil (11:30 PM): Yeah?

Roman (11:31 PM): Yes, Patton?

Patton (11:32 PM): I know this will sound random but… Thank you

Patton (11:32 PM): Thank you for being with me for so long

Patton (11:32 PM): Thank you for accepting and understanding me

Patton (11:33 PM): Thank you for being so kind and so nice and for having me in your lifes

Patton (11:33 PM): Having you as my partners was the best thing that ever happened to me and I don’t know how I’d be able to live without any of you

Patton (11:34 PM): I just have a lot of feelings hehe

Patton (11:34 PM): Anyway… That’s it. I’m going to sleep now but I had to say it.

Patton (11:35 PM): I love you, dears!

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writemywaytoyourheart · 5 years

Text

One- Next

a/n: so like, here it is. tada~ I hope you guys like it! Sorry if it seems a bit rushed, I just really want to get to the present day so that we can meet hobi T-T but I did do my best! again, pls don’t let this flop

pairing: idolau! Hoseok x female reader

genre: angst, fluff

word count: 2,904

warnings for this chapter: language, cheating, non-consensual kiss, implied self-harm...I think that’s it

Trigger Warning: if u get triggered easily, pls read other stuff on my ML. It's in my bio!

Tag list: @melikeylikeyjimin @jannoda

if you want to be on the tag list, send an ask or dm me :)

Daisies in the Dark Masterlist

Part Two: When Somebody Loves You

~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~

The second you stepped through the threshold of what would be your new home; a breath you hadn’t even known you were holding released with a huge sigh. The apartment wasn’t big at all with a small kitchen, a tiny sitting space that had bookshelves about half full with what you assumed were Eui’s books, a small hallway turned off to the right where you figured the bedrooms and bathroom were, it was dimly lit with a small lamp on a coffee table.

It was perfect.

Eui stumbled into the apartment a second later and laughed breathlessly at your stunned face as she plunked one of your bags down, “like what you see? It isn’t much, but it is cozy.” You spun around over and over taking in every single inch that you could and holding in tears of joy before you turned back to your new friend, “it’s absolutely amazing, I love it so much, thank you.” The lingering nausea from your nerves was now gone completely, replaced by comfort at your surroundings.

Eui smiled while nodding then patted you on the shoulder, “no need to thank me girlie, I know we’re gonna have an awesome time together! Let’s get you unpacked!”

To say you had an awesome time together would be an understatement. You were more of an introvert before coming to Korea because you never really had anyone to hang out with, always eating lunch alone and studying alone. Group projects were always the worst when everyone jumped to grab whoever they wanted to work with, constantly leaving you in an awkward position seeing as everyone had a partner but you. Things were different after you met Eui though, she took you out to the arcade and to food stands, slowly bringing you out of your comfort zone. At first it was just the two of you, then she introduced you to some other girls that you would be going to school with.

The rest of the semester and through the summer was filled with giggling girl talks and romantic movie nights, stuffing yourselves with pizza and junk food. When school started again, you were nervous but knew you could handle it with Eui and your new friends to do it alongside you. Classes were hard but you continued to study and do your best, to thank your wonderful teacher who sent you here and prove that she hadn’t done it for nothing.

About two months into the semester you felt Eui start to pull away a bit. It happened after she met a boy in college; you were studying one night when she burst into your room and jumped on the bed squealing. You shut your books and laughed at her excitement, “what’s going on?? Why are you so excited??” She took a deep exaggerated breath then proceeded to explain, “ok, you know Kim Yung-Kwon from mathematics that I’m totally in love with?” You nodded and she continued, “he started talking to me today and he literally ended up asking me out to coffee!!” Your eyes widened and you jumped up to join in her mini dance party, screaming and giggling over her crush liking her back.

Needless to say, she accepted the date. After that day she spent a lot more time in her room on the phone with her new boyfriend, which you totally understood, so you gave her space. You two stopped your daily outings and only went out together once every few weeks. It was okay with you since you were busy with school and actually happened to find an internship at a company not too far from your place.

You got the internship, and from there everything went to hell.

6 months before the incident...

“Hello, my name is Y/L/N Y/N, I hope we work well together. Please take care of me!” You bowed to your new coworkers and they smiled, bowing in return. They were really nice people and your first day went smoothly. You were in charge of making copies, bringing coffee, scheduling meetings and taking notes for those who could not attend said meetings. It was pretty easy; especially since the girl training you made it easy to understand and she was super nice.

After your shift you went to clock out, you were looking down to fix everything you were holding and ran right smack into someone’s hard chest. You looked up to apologize and stepped back in surprise when you saw who it was, “Kim Yung-Kwon?” You asked and he nodded while laughing, “Y/N?” You bowed and smiled laughing a bit yourself, “funny running into you! What brings you here?” He smiled back and picked up some of the papers you dropped after running into him. He handed them to you and answered your question, “I got an internship here. I’m guessing you did as well?” You nodded and he brightened then stepped to the side to let you walk past, “well I hope to see you around Y/N, I have to go, but you should join Eui and I on a day out sometime!” You smiled once more while passing by him, “that sounds fun! Let me know what you guys come up with. See you around!” You waved to each other then you walked away, a pit of dread in your stomach at the butterflies that were in you at your encounter.

Kim Yung-Kwon was a very handsome young man, but he was definitely taken. You slapped yourself gently on the cheek to bring your mind back. Don’t you dare Y/N, don’t you dare! You chided yourself as you walked to the bus stop. Eui was your best friend and if there was one thing you wouldn’t do, it would be stealing a taken man. You stepped into your home and saw Eui lounging on the couch. Eui looked up from her phone and waved to you, asking happily, “how was your first day?? Yung-Kwon texted me and said he ran into you today!” You breathed a sigh of relief that she already knew and plopped yourself down next to her. You two spent the night talking and gossiping like the old days a few months ago. Like nothing had changed.

Except that day, everything changed. Neither of you knew it yet though.

Work and school were your norm those days. Day in and day out, studying and doing the internship. Yung-Kwon was always really sweet to you and you hung out with him and Eui a few times a week. You knew he liked Eui a lot and you knew you could keep your feelings in check, but you couldn’t shake the feeling that you were doing something wrong, the uneasy pit dwelling in your stomach made you miss out on a few outings with them.

It was all saved however, by Lee Jin-Ho. A boy that would talk to you on a daily basis since your start of school. You always thought he was cute and sweet, and he was really easy to talk to. You were completely blind-sided though when he finally had the courage to ask you on a date. Your feelings for Yung-Kwon disappeared the more you went out with Jin-Ho. You never had a boyfriend in your entire life so the whole ordeal was foreign and a bit stressful for you. Jin-Ho was a complete sweetheart and totally infatuated with you, so he was patient and never pressured you into anything.

3 months before the incident...

One time about two months into your relationship, you two went to the arcade together. You walked in and smiled at the purple flashing lights, K-pop songs blasting and people laughing. Jin-Ho went immediately to a claw machine that had stuffed animals in it. “Which one do you want, Y/N?” You laughed and joined him, scanning the toys and pointing to a little stuffed bear, “I want that one!” He nodded and got right down to business. Never in your entire life have you had someone care so much about you, let alone like you. This whole thing was mesmerizing and you were so scared that it would shatter into a million pieces at any minute. It must be a dream, because good things don’t happen to you.

After a good twenty tries, Jin-Ho finally hollered in victory, holding up the tiny bear and presenting it to you with a smile. You weren’t thinking and went right in for a hug, it was the first time anything physical besides holding hands was initiated between you two. He froze for only a second before hugging you back just as tight. You’d never been happier, and you knew you never would be. You didn’t need anything else.

Turns out you’d never been more wrong in your life.

2 months before the incident...

It was the party. You knew going to a party would be a terrible idea, but Jin-Ho knew the person throwing it and told you that the people there weren’t the reckless drunk type you always heard about. You two walked in and you could smell the alcohol already, flashbacks from your past started to swarm your mind until you felt his arm around your waist protectively. Jin-Ho whispered into your ear, “it’s okay baby. I got you.” His pet name for you sent a chill down your spine and you nodded. Your boyfriend kissed the top of your head and led you to a couch, “I’m going to get us some drinks, stay here and don’t worry.” You grabbed his hand and stuttered, “n-no alcohol, right?” He smiled and nodded, gave your hand a reassuring squeeze before disappearing into the crowd.

That was the last time you saw your boyfriend that night. Now, Lee Jin-Ho you did see again, but this time he had a girl on his lap making out with her and running his hands all over her body. You had gone to search for him, and you found him. He happened to see you a second later. But unlike what you expected to happen, the boy you thought you loved didn’t look concerned or regretful. He never got up or pushed the girl away. He never called your name out to explain himself. Instead, he smirked at you before raising an eyebrow, as if to say, what? Watch all you want, before turning back to the girl and continuing what he started. Who knew that something so precious and dear could be ripped from you in a split second?

You ran to the bathroom, shoving past people, some gave you pitiful looks and some laughed at you. You rushed to the toilet and threw up a few times, until nothing was left in your stomach. You were numb. A lot of running happened that night as you ran out of the party and all the way home. There were no questions asked when you burst into the apartment sobbing, your makeup running down your face. Eui gestured to you and held you in her arms, singing to you. Rocking you back and forth while you cried your heart out over your first relationship heartbreak. Eui whispered how much she loved you and how sorry she was.

You took a few days off, saying you were sick. Which, technically you were throwing up. At just the thought of that man, you couldn’t help but rid your body of the little you ate that day. Your stomach wouldn’t stop turning for weeks. Eui came in however, after about a week. She pulled you out of bed and forced you to dress, eat and go out with her. You couldn’t explain how hard it was to do normal everyday tasks, especially when Jin-Ho was still in some of your classes.

He never spoke to you again, would walk by you as if you were nothing more than-

a used tissue....

But, you wouldn’t let him continue to hurt you. So, you turned back to what you promised yourself you would never do again. You numbed the pain, and there was only one way that that always worked. Long sleeves would have to go back in fashion again, for you at least. If anyone could hurt you, it would be yourself.

“You’re fine, Y/N….You don’t need him anyways.”

1 month before the incident...

You continued to do the internship, the best part of the day was when you ate lunch with Yung-Kwon and Eui when she came to join you guys. Yung-Kwon never acted as if he pitied you, for which you were extremely grateful. It had been almost a year since you came to Korea, and a lot had happened. You just hoped that it would get brighter from there on out.

The final straw was that day.

That one day you would forever wish you could turn back to and stop. Stop everything that was never supposed to happen....

1 week before the incident...

It was just another day at work, you were typing up a few emails while you rubbed your eyes in exhaustion. It was around lunchtime, but you still had a lot to do. You were sending your last email when you got a text from Yung-Kwon:

“On the roof?” You asked yourself in confusion, but then brushed it off. There were lunch tables on the roof and you three had wanted to try it out someday. You wished Eui would be coming, but you guessed she was busy. Your feelings for Yung-Kwon were strictly friendly those days. You had been able to talk sense into yourself and realize he was just a nice guy, and your heart hadn’t been used to nice guys. After seeing one it immediately wanted him. Now you knew better, and so did your heart. You packed up your stuff and got up to make your way to the roof. You walked up the stairs and pushed the door to the roof open. Yung-Kwon was standing at the balcony looking down into the street. Just then your phone pinged with a text from Eui.

What was she talking about? Yung-Kwon said she was busy….You quickly typed a reply and smiled, Yung-Kwon would be happy that she could make it!

You frowned at the text in confusion but got distracted when you heard Yung-Kwon call your name, “Y/N! Come on, I got food already.” You walked over and sat down on one of the benches. Yung-Kwon sat right next to you, which confused you. You scooted a little away from him and started opening your sandwich that he bought for you. You decided to let Eui surprise him so you said nothing.

“Thanks for the lunch.”

“Of course Y/N.”

He opened his sandwich then turned back to you, “uh, can I ask you something?” You nodded and went to take a bite of your food when his next words made you freeze, “are you in love with me?” You turned to him in shock, your eyes bugging out of your head and your mind screaming at you to just get up and leave. You stupidly stayed put, furrowing your brows and shaking your head, “what are you talking about Yung-Kwon? I am not in love with you, weirdo.” You laughed it off, thinking maybe he was pulling a prank on you. It wasn’t a very funny one though.

You jumped when he grabbed your hand and you tried to pull away. He held on tight and looked into your eyes, “Y/N, you can be honest. I know you’re scared because of what Jin-Ho did to you. But, I would never hurt you. I- I think I’m in love with you.” You yanked your hand out of his and stood up, “you better shut up right now Yung-Kwon. I don’t know what you’re playing but it isn’t funny. You think I would turn right around and cheat with someone right after knowing what it’s like?! And to my best friend??” He stood up and walked towards you, forcing you to walk back until you couldn’t anymore because of the railing.

“Don’t be ridiculous Y/N. Jin-Ho was an asshole, and we all know it. I’m in love with you and you’re in love with me so it’s different!” You stared at him in shocked silence before responding, “what the hell are you talking about?? We don’t love each other! You love Eui!!” He shook his head, “no I don’t! Ever since I found out you were interning here, that first day. Something changed for me. I knew you liked me then.” You flinched at his touch on your cheek and slapped his hand away, “don’t touch me!” At that moment, you saw the door to the roof open behind his shoulder and saw Eui slip through carrying a bag of food.

You were about to shove him away from you and call out to her, when to your horror he grabbed your hands and pulled you to him.

Maybe Eui would run to help you.

Maybe Eui would understand and come save you.

Maybe Eui would know you.

But, don’t you remember, silly girl? Good things don’t happen to you.

Yung-Kwon smashed his lips against yours at the exact second Eui waved, her eyes locking on the scene before her, her face blanching. She dropped the bag with a thunk.

Yung-Kwon stole your first kiss…..and your best friend in the entire world went right along with it.

~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~

a/n 2.0: ok...this gave me more grief than the first chapter lmao. if y’all don’t like this im giving up....JUST KIDDING IM GONNA MAKE A HOBI FIC IF IT DESTROYS ME . which it probably will.

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heuristicallyinclined · 4 years

Text

Nobody Knows

Chapter 2: Ah, here we go again

Part 2/? (Word count: 1,841 | Rated T | Past MSPA Reader x Mallek Adalov, MSPA Reader x Mallek Adalov, Past MSPA Reader x Polypa Goezee, Background DaveKat)

AO3 Links: Part One | Part Two (This) | Part Three

Chapter Summary: MSPA Reader wakes up in an unfamiliar, terrifying place with unfamiliar, terrifying people. But what else is new?

Notes: Thanks for all of the support from the first chapter! I was really blown away by all of it. Enjoy some set-up before the inevitable angst.

(See the end of the chapter for more notes.)

The first thing you notice when you come to is the chittering of machinery. Earth tech hums when it runs, maybe you hear a fan or two. Alternian tech chitters. Sometimes it even makes a soft screeching sound. You prefer not to think too hard about it. The next thing you notice is the headache you have. Your forehead is throbbing and when you open your eyes the room is moving. Damn, you have had your fair share of concussions, but this is new. In your infinite intelligence, you finally realize that this is because you are getting carried like a sack of potatoes over the shoulder of a stranger. Well, fuck.

Slowly and carefully, you crane your head back to get a glimpse of whoever is holding you. You see large horns extending horizontally and curving towards their face. Their uniform having some intricate repeating bronze pattern. Realizing this is an adult, you become very conscious of your breathing. Just extremely slow and even. Oh God. You have never seen this troll before in your life. You continue to glance around and notice you are on some sort of vessel. A door opens and your captor joins another bronze troll. A new stranger, maybe a friend? You stop yourself from introducing yourself so you can hear what they say. Now is not the time to be horny for platonic connections.

“So ! nearly tr!pped over th!s sh!t on my back from do!ng !nventory !n the cargo bay. Do you have any !dea what the fuck th!s !s?” Your captor asks with an excited lit, swinging you off of his shoulder and holding you by the back of the hood. You remain still, motionless, having perfected the art of playing dead to fool drones into not culling you. Not your most dignified skill, but definitely one of your more useful ones. Something thuds as it is set down to your right.

“()h gr()ss, d()n’t t()uch it with y()ur fr()nds.” Your captor chuckles while their colleague sighs in exasperated disgust. Ah yes, you didn’t miss this. Alternia has made you super self-conscious about your body in the weirdest ways just about as much as it has made you fear for your life. But one of those things is temporary. You know you’re cute, friendly, are incredibly resourceful and optimistic. You have nice legs! The clown pope said so! But you can still hear the sneer in her voice, “It pr()bably just wandered ()n b()ard during the last rest()ck and the change in gravity culled it ()r s()mething, I d()n’t kn()w.” She sounds a little pissed now, “Etiv()r just st()p playing with it and dr()p it in with the rest ()f the trash s() y()u can help me get the rest ()f the requisiti()ns delivered.”

Etivor shakes you a bit in front of her. She doesn’t react. “F!ne Yleeda,” he draws her name out and huffs, clearly disappointed, “!’ll be back.” You get thrown back over his shoulder and you can hear a light growl come from him. She apparently does too, and mockingly chitters at him, dropping another box onto her pile. “Wait, what if that thing i-,” she starts, but Etivor isn’t having it and picked up to pace and is already gone. Bold move.

He slows down after a while and walks and as he does you pass by a window. You look for telltale moon colors, but you seem to be in the middle of nowhere with nothing particularly familiar in sight. On a spaceship. Full of adults. Neat. Well, mortal peril is always a solid way of getting out of your head.

He continues onward and you hear other trolls pass by you, all of them caught up in their own work or conversations, none of the spare you two too much of a glace. A door slides open and he sets you on the ground. You hear him step away from you and fiddle with the settings on what you think is the trash, and you'd rather not get immolated today, no thank you. It begins to clunkily whir to life before settling on a scratchy, chittery sound. Luckily, you notice you didn’t hear the door close. You get up slowly, quietly, and slink over to the door, the machine helping to obscure any sounds you were making. You don’t need to be stealthy for too long, just enough to get the door and you can just abs- and he is looking right at you.

You try to match the familiar look of wide-eyed "what in the actual fuck is that" that trolls have often graced you with when meeting you for the first time. His pupil skits widen slightly and his mouth is set in a hard, straight line. You both remain frozen and are locked in a staring contest. You stay like that together for a good ten seconds and you become intimately aware of how long ten seconds in total silence is. He blinks and as he starts to reach for you, you do the only thing you think to do. Blurt out some dumb shit and stick your nose where it doesn’t belong.

Were you also getting a pitch vibe off of that or was that just me, because I know you need to be professional, working here and all but I feel like if I wasn’t there you two would definitely have gotten into an argument? Are you two like a thing or have something going on there or…? You wiggle your hands noncommittally.

If you weren't terrified, you would be laughing at the look he is giving you. He immediately pulls his hand back and holds it to himself, aghast. His mouth opens and shuts as he struggles to figure out what to say before settling into a concerned frown. He steps back in confusion with an expression betraying he was clearly not prepared for you to be alive, or sentient, or fluent in Alternian, or immediately asking him about his love life. He is very clearly trying to unpack a lot and you are just trying to put some space between you and someone who easily has two feet on you and a lot of muscle, hopefully gained from things other than hauling aliens into fiery dumpsters.

“Uh. What. ! mean maybe? But ! don't, wa!t th-“

Because I feel like you were definitely trying to piss her off a little bit, like not enough to ruin her night or anything and fuck up her work, but like she'll be thinking about it, so I think that's smart, kinda leaving the ball in her court as you left.

He gives you the smallest, tightest smile as he uncomfortably, slightly nods, locked in place. He looks like he is trying to smile after biting a lemon. This man is deeply fucking uncomfortable which you can deal with much better rather than hostile. You need to keep this shit up. Fuck, WWGD?

What would Gorgor do? You think back to his tricks and techniques that you learned from being his partner. How to maintain control over a situation without dominating it completely or else a highblood could easily feel like you were overstepping and at best, get defensive and shut you down and choose another teal. You don't want to think about the worst case scenario. But you are not Tagora Gorjek and have not been playing four dimensional mental chess with people since hatching. Also death is more of a temporary roadblock at this point, so really, there is no sweep like the sweep you’re fucking in since you couldn’t escape it even if you wanted to.

You already overstepped by making this about quads so you just need to keep talking confidently long enough to fluster him into answering so that you can try to run off. An alien coming back from the dead out of concern for his personal life is probably doing it well enough.

Do you two have like a history from before this or did it start when you got your assignments here?

You are trying to convey an authority you don't fucking have. But as someone once taught you, image is everything and to fake it until you make it. You don't need to have your shit together, god no, but if religiously following a nineteen step east Alternian skin care regimen or parroting back bullshit you've heard like you're a goddamn relationship wizard makes people think you do, then bitch you better roll with it.

"We started working together l!ke a few wipes ago, but k!nda just started talk!ng," he says slowly and unsure, staring at you. You hum knowingly at him and he squints at you, perturbed. You place a hand on your chin and shift your stance to that of one in thoughtful consideration, the fact that you are closer to door thanks to it is not relevant. You look like you do this all the time, which you do. He glances around the room and pales.

God, he must be panicking worse than you are. He is answering. This is probably ideal. Okay plan time, so he and the other lady, Yleeda, are the only ones who saw you here. Wherever here is, and she thinks you’re dead so really you just need to have him be incredibly cool and then run into literally no other person on board the ship while exploring it, figure out where you are, and how you got here. Easy if you don’t think about it.

You were trying to get to Mallek and he is neither of these people so maybe he is on board somewhere on whatever place they restocked at. Maybe he does get to work with tech and he got to hole up somewhere with access to energy drinks that would kill anyone gold and below. This could mean you will never find him. Okay, you need to deal with one thing at a time.

Oh, so when you got started working on this ship? Is Yleeda doing anything to irk you back?

You ask this while stepping to look cool and relaxed against a wall, like all normal, cool guys do. Guys who are calm and not worried at all about incineration. Guys just trying to get a feel for where others are at so that they can give appropriate advice in appropriate situations that they are in. Those guys. You are them.

Your back finally makes contact with a wall. Or at least you thought it was a wall based off of how solid it was. You look up when you feel something grab your shoulder. The sound of the machinery that you thought would mask your footsteps definitely masked Yleeda’s entering the room. She stares down at you and then back up at Etivor, her gloved hand holding you firm.

Oh.

So that plan didn't work.

Notes: How quickly can one person get attached to fantrolls made up on the spot to act as plot devices? One author finds out.

#homestuck #hiveswap #friendsim #mspa reader #mallek adalov #hs mallek #mallek x reader #my writing

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machine-gun-casie · 4 years

Text

73 questions.

I was tagged by @wescoasts (just found out what ur url means lol also love you)

I tag @angrylizardjacket @enchantedamusedslightlyconfused @ticketstomydownfall @actinglikethat @machine-gun-colson @storiesforallfandoms @harringtonstudios (ik some of yall have been tagged i just dont have other friends)

On a scale of 1-10, how excited are you about life right now?

like a 2

Describe yourself in a hashtag?

#¯\_(ツ)_/¯

If you could do a love scene with anyone, who would it be?

kells is gonna be like half these answers #sorrynotsorry

If your life was a musical, what would the marquee say?

...what is that? google says its a tent?

What’s one thing people don’t know about you?

uh im not sure but maybe that my grandma almost killed me when i was 6? idk im not a private person

What’s your wakeup ritual?

wake up whenever (woke up at 9pm today? sleep schedule? i dont know her), check phone on the toilet, brush teeth, join family downstairs as they applaud my appearance because they never see me.

What’s your go to bed ritual?

skincare (when im not dying on the inside), watch an episode of something, watch some asmr (dont judge me it helps me sleep), and pass out for 12 hours.

What’s your favorite time of day?

witching hour

Your go to for having a good laugh?

tiktok or my fav youtubers currently cody ko kurtis conner drew gooden and danny gonzalez

Dream country to visit?

im grateful to be well travelled but i wish i stayed in bruges for longer it was so beautiful

What’s the biggest surprise you’ve had?

my last birthday was a surprise party, was pretty surprised

Heels or flats/sneakers?

either heels or adidas nmds literally no in between

Vintage or new?

new

Who do you want to write your obituary?

we dont do those where im from

Style icon?

no one in particular tbh but i do love the soft girl aesthetic

What are three things you can’t live without?

my friends and family, writing, and some sort of order in my life

What’s one ingredient you put in everything?

i dont cook but saffron is amazing with everything almost

What 3 people living or dead would you like to make dinner for?

make dinner? no one i would burn it all. have dinner with? kells. #sorrynotsorry

What’s your biggest fear in life?

Failure.

Window or aisle seat?

aisle, i need to pee man

What’s your current TV obsession?

roadies

Favorite app?

tumblr

Secret talent?

i sing sometimes

Most adventurous thing you’ve done in your life?

flew a plane

How would you define yourself in three words?

loyal, empathetic, and creative

Favourite piece of clothing you own?

i dont own it but i steal it all the time, my dad’s old jean jacket from niagara falls

Must have clothing item everyone should have?

over sized hoodies

Superpower you would want?

read peoples’ minds and be invisible

What’s inspiring you in life right now?

kells and his story

Best piece of advice you’ve received?

do whatever, literally no one cares.

Best advice you’d give your teenage self?

standing up for yourself is not selfish.

A book that everyone should read?

the whole series of unfortunate events. i aspire to be as crazy a writer as lemony snicket

What would you like to be remembered for?

my kindness?

How do you define beauty?

beauty is in the eye of the beholder. what i find beautiful changes everyday

What do you love most about your body?

my lips and my hair and the color of my skin (im like a soft caramel and i like it and im tired of people telling me that it isnt attractive)

Best way to take a rest/decompress?

sleep, sit out in the sun, cuddle if u can

Favourite place to view art?

museums

If your life were a song, what would the title be?

i have no clue

If you could master one instrument, what would it be?

piano

If you had a tattoo, where would it be?

on the side of my ribcage

Dolphins or koalas?

dolphins

What’s your spirit animal?

a phoenix

Best gift you’ve ever received?

my mom gave me a beautiful gold necklace with my initial in arabic i wear it every day

Best gift you’ve ever given?

i gave this girl a jar full of little slips of paper they were a hundred reasons why i loved her. also one day she was craving these gummies and ringpops and they dont sell those here and i ordered a huge box just for her. we ain’t friends anymore.

What’s your favourite board game?

game of life or battleship

What’s your favourite colour?

blue/pink/yellow

Least favourite colour?

orange

Diamonds or pearls?

diamonds

Drugstore makeup or designer?

both are nice

Blow-dry or air-dry?

air-dry!! love my curls

Pilates or yoga?

sleep

Coffee or tea?

tea

What’s the weirdest word in the English language?

moist.

Dark chocolate or milk chocolate?

dark mint chocolate

Stairs or elevator?

elevator

Summer or winter?

summer

You are stuck on an island, you can pick one food to eat forever without getting tired of it, what would you eat?

mangoes

A desert you don’t like?

cant think of any

A skill you’re working on mastering?

typing in arabic and writing angst

Best thing to happen to you today?

we’re living through a pandemic, nothing good happens now

Best compliment you’ve ever received?

that i have an angelic voice

Favorite smell?

orange blossom or rose

Hugs or kisses?

hugs!! i was voted best hugger

If you made a documentary, what would it be about?

misconceptions about muslims

Last piece of content you consumed that made you cry?

saw a vlog where two sisters went to gym and i cried cuz i miss my sister

Lipstick or lip gloss?

gloss!!

Sweet or savoury?

sweet

Girl crush?

alessia cara

How you know you’re in love?

idk ive never been

Song you can listen to on repeat?

the break up by kells

If you could switch lives with someone for a day who would it be?

id rather not

What are you most excited about at this time in your life?

becoming an aunt!!

#j talks #mutuals #tumblr games

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boysinthecity · 6 years

Text

Reverse Heroine | IV

parts: ➳ 1 | 2 | 3 | 4 | 5 / ?

a supposedly only 2 part fic ft. fuckboy!jungkook x reader

summary: because platonic love is underrated

genre: college au, fluff/angst

word count: 5.4k

a/n: its been too long. but i’m finally back to writing! that’s if anyone is still up for reading this 👼🏻 anyways, please let me know how u feel about this chapter! also i didn’t proofread.

“Hey-”

“Hey!”

You stop in your footsteps when you feel a hand land on your shoulder, meeting eyes with Jungkook – who’s catching his breath when he calls your name. With a small smile on your lips, you pull your earphones out of your ear.

“Sorry, I – uh -” You gestured at the white earbuds, “couldn’t hear you.”

Jungkook flashes his signature bunny grin, giving you a brief shake of his head. “It’s fine.” He looks down on the floor for a short second, before meeting your gaze again. “So, um - you suddenly left yesterday-”

Memories from yesterday flood in. After the realization of your growing affections for the boy, it was painful to witness Jungkook look at Daeun like she was his world, his everything. You were getting ahead of yourself again, false expectations of something more. Jungkook has always seen you with a friend, he never did anything that made you believe otherwise. No, you couldn’t ruin your friendship with him like that, you couldn’t betray Jungkook.

“Oh – I got a text from Tae, saying he needed my help for something.” Words flow out smoothly as you lie without hesitation.

Jungkook’s eyes flashes with worry, “Did something bad happened?” He takes a step closer and a rush of guilt hits you for lying to his face. “Are you alright? Yo- you didn’t get hurt or anything, right?”

You quickly shake your head, dismissing any uneasiness that was lingering in his mind. “It was nothing important! He was just asking me about the-” You pause, quickly saying out the first thing that pops in your head “-physics assignment.” You start nod repeatedly, hoping that you can convince him more than you convinced yourself.

“I see…” Jungkook mumbles, looking away to quickly scan the walking crowds on campus grounds. You stall for a moment, scolding yourself that you have to stop acting so weird before Jungkook realises that something has changed.

“Are you okay, though?” You ask, sincere eyes peering at him. “Your talk with Daeun, I’m guessing that it all went well…?” It was hard to miss how Jungkook’s lips pull into a grin again, beaming with happiness. There was no doubt that the boy had been waiting to discuss about this topic with you. That’s what you are good for – when he had girl problems.

“I thought about it, Y/N. I really did.” He tells you, “From now on, I’m going to really focus on being her friend again – someone that she needs. And whatever feelings I have right now, I’m sure they’ll go away eventually, you know?”

“Right…they’ll go away…” Your voice echoes after Jungkook, telling yourself the same exact words. You need to pull yourself out of this tangled web of suppressed feelings before you sink in even deeper. “I’m happy for you, Kook. I really am.” A warm smile is playing on his lips when he hears your response, making you naturally returning the gesture. “By the way, we’re still on for tonight?”

His eyes widen, before muttering a curse under his breath.

“….and you forgot.”

A surge of panic flashes across Jungkook’s features, creating a little knit between his eyebrows. “It-it’s just that I promised Daeun yesterday that we’d do a movie night just like the old ti- I’m so, so, sorry, Y/N. You know how long it has been since we’ve – ”

It can’t be helped that you could only look away in slight disappointment, trying to focus on the scrambling students in the background rather than the boy in front of you. Jungkook seems to have sense your sudden change of mood, stopping himself immediately.

“Actually, I’ll just ask Daeun if we can do a raincheck. I promised you first, it’d be unfai-”

“It’s fine, Kook.” You interrupt him, suddenly feeling bad at how difficult you were making things for him. You told yourself to never be one of those girls, the ones that played mind games and guilt trip people around them. You’ve already decided that you are going to stick by his side as a good friend, and you should follow through. “You go have fun with Daeun, okay? We can just go to the new arcade another today.” A convincing smile plays at your lips, and Jungkook fails to hide the sudden look of relief on his face.

“You are seriously the best, Y/N.” He wraps his arms around you, so tightly that your laughs end up sounding like you were choking. “I’ll make it up to you next time – I swear. But for tonight, I think you should still go to the arcade, you deserve a break after your exams.” Jungkook suggests, a grin on his lips. “Besides, Taehyung would cry in happiness if he could go with you.”

“Tae? I thought you said that he was busy when I asked you to invite hi-”

Jungkook stifles a laugh, eyes shifting away from your gaze.

“-Jeon Jungkook! You didn’t invite him, again?” Your eyes narrow into slits, playfully slapping the boy on his arm. Jungkook backs away, eyes smiling so hard that you couldn’t even see them anymore. Before he runs away from your flaming wrath of fury, he shouts.

“I’ll tell Tae to meet you at 8:00!”

And it turns out that not only was your date late – but it was also different Kim that greeted you.

Kim Namjoon.

He was still catching his breath when you felt a tap on your shoulders, finding Namjoon standing before you. Even in a state of frenzy, he still manages to look strikingly handsome – expected no less from the boy who stole your heart in your high school days. He has a small dimpled smile on his lips when he shyly waves to you. You, on the other hand, did not look so pleased at the new visitor.

“Why are you here?” Your voice was cold, matching the stoic and emotionless expression on your face. “I was told that Taehyung would meet me instead.”

Namjoon frowns slightly, unable to hide his disappoint at the obvious distance that you’ve casted between the two of you. “Always the coldness, huh?” When he sees your lack of response at his comment, he quickly tries to gather your attention before you can turn your back on him. “I was beside Tae when Jungkook called him, and…kind of overheard about your plans on coming here tonight.” He pauses to take a look at whether you were actually listening or not. “Taehyung was supposed to be the one meeting you here tonight – but then he suddenly remembered about his Zoology midterm tomorrow and was kind of panicking because that kid has seriously not touched a single page of his material since school started but then he was afraid that if he told Jungkook he won’t get another chance to chill with you because Kook can be a little possessive piece of shit at tim-”

Namjoon halts when he notices your impatience ticking away – he appears to have gone off track, again. He quickly clears his throat, feeling a little jittery under your cold gaze and it’s just always been so entertaining to him how you – someone so small and endearing like you could always make him feel like a young boy with his first love. ‘Pull yourself together, Namjoon. It’s not the time to be reminiscing about how stupid you’ve been to have let this girl-“.

“I’m not here to listen about how much of a little shit Jungkook is, because I’m well aware of that already.” You calmly speak, interrupting his train of thought. There were no traces of humor on your face but Namjoon knew – that this was your way of telling a joke. It’s a little peculiar on how you expressed yourself at times but he could almost feel his heart tighten at how adorable you looked in this moment.

Namjoon chuckles softly before speaking again. “Pretty much, I watched Taehyung have a mini-mental breakdown and offered to go in his place, sincerely.”

You perch your lips. “Doesn’t seem that sincere considering that you were late for 20 minutes-”

A brown cup holder with 2 bubble teas appear within your vision, with a slightly flustered Namjoon in the back. “I wanted to surprise you with your favourite drink.” He pauses when he sees the glint in ur eyes and a hint of your smile. “And I already exchanged the tokens for the games.” You look down at his other hand and find a plastic bag with numerous silver coins.

Namjoon stands still in front of you, eyes glued on the floor - afraid to look up and face the possibility that you were already gone. Instead, a hand snatches one of the drinks and walks past him. Namjoon immediately turns around and finds you raising your eyebrows at him.

“Well, are you gonna come with? Or…” You take a sip of your drink, attempting to hide your smile.

“Y-Yeah!” Namjoon almost jumps up with enthusiasm as he follows you close behind.

By the end of the night, you’ve already lost count of how many times Joon has made you laugh so hard that you felt tears at the corners of your eyes. To his dismay, they were not intentional - most of them were attempts to be cool but all ended up being the opposite. And with only a few coins left, the both of you decided to try your luck at the claw machine.

Namjoon almost broke the glass when he walked straight into a machine that had these baby blue koala pillows. You walked towards the other side of the machine and almost squealed at how cute the koalas looked with a soft sleepy smile. You chuckle when you see that Namjoon is still staring at the dolls - cheeks squished against the glass and eyes gleaming.

Perhaps its moments like these when you remember why Namjoon is your first love.

“Okay move over, Joon. Let the master show you how its done.” You stretch dramatically and smugly jut your chin forward.

“W-wait! That’s not how it’s supposed to be! I’m supposed to be the one who-” Namjoon doesn’t even have a moment to react before you give him a light push to slide over. A finger lands on his lips, and he stares at you in mild surprise.

“Hush, young one.” You whisper under your breath, “I need to be in my zone.” In response, you receive soft laughter emitting from his lips that was soon silenced by your glare.

“It’s all yours.” He bows at you teasingly. Neither of you spoke another word when you moving the handle, with absolute silence in the background. Namjoon watches in tension as the claw starts moving towards the doll, coming down to pick at the ear-

And it misses.

“Argh!” You let out a frustrated grunt. “Stupid Kim Namjoon! You interrupted me with your loud stupid voice!” At this point, Namjoon could only look at you with a loving smile on his lips – he has realised that he was absolutely weak for you. It was unbearable for him to see how damn cute you are. The revelation bring him back to a conversation with Yoongi hyung back in his third year.

“Honestly, she is just batshit crazy!” Namjoon groans as he slams the door shut, causing a surprised Yoongi to flinch.

“I’m guessing you’re talking about Jessica?” He resumes munching on the pack of chips in his hands, eyes unfazed as he continues his Nolan marathon.

“It’s only been like – what, 2 weeks? – since we’ve started dating and she’s already throwing her temper at me!”

‘Damn, Anne Hathaway really does make a good catwoman’, Yoongi thinks.

Namjoon doesn’t notice Yoongi’s lack of attention so he continues anyways. “I was just asking my classmate, who just so happens to be a female, about our midterm and she gets so fucking jealous about it!” His voice thunders across the entire house, finally bringing Yoongi to cast a glance towards his direction. At this very moment, the new Alpha Sig recruits downstairs shudder in fear at the shouting above. A silent remainder to never piss of the VP Internal – the man is not the composed and friendly person he appears to be.

“Okay…but –”

“And the worst part? She does all this in the library where everyone is trying to study!” Namjoon flops onto Yoongi’s bed and groans, oblivious to his friend’s eyebrow twitch.

Yoongi finally puts his chips down and turns his chair to face the younger man, fingers adjusting his glasses upwards. “First of all,” He blinks, “Get. Off. My. Bed.”

It doesn’t take another word for Namjoon to quickly slide onto the floor – eyes looking up towards Yoongi, who then grunts in approval and goes back to his laptop screen.

“Second, you don’t seem to even like the chick that much. Why are you even dating her?”

“Uhh –” It takes a few moments before Namjoon speaks again. “she’s hot?” His tone sounds unconvincing to Yoongi. “Plus, Prez been telling me that Alpha Sig always goes for the hottest girls. And the Kappas, are the equivalent to hot girls.”

Yoongi laughs, not the sincere ones – but more of the single “Hah!” that he always does. “So you’re dating a bimbo – who can’t tell the difference between HIV and HPV, to show our equally intelligent President, that you got ‘game’.” Yoongi’s words drip in sarcasm. “Sounds about right, kid.”

Before Namjoon can further question his friend’s presence in the fraternity, Yoongi speaks up again to defend himself. “Like I said too many times, I’m only apart of this frat for the credentials and the singles room. Also, my fossil of a brother was like the President a few decades ago so I didn’t even need to go through hazing.”

“Didn’t Joonki sunbae-nim like graduate only two years ag–”

“As I was saying,” Yoongi interrupts him, “Look Namjoon, if the girl is someone that you truly like, then everything she does will only make you fall for her harder. Even when she’s roasting your head in flames– it’d be cute.”

Namjoon snaps out of his daze when he realises that there were no more tokens left. He sees you holding the last coin, eyes tightly shut and suddenly widening them. As you insert it into the machine, you’re mumbling some sort of good luck chant and Namjoon could finally understand what Yoongi meant.

“Yeah, definitely cute.” He whispers.

You snap your head to the left. “What did you say?” Your attention on Namjoon was short-lived because before he could respond with some lame, made-up answer, the happy tune starts playing from the machine again.

“One last time, I got this!”

A little more right…more…mor–perfect!

You clench your eyes shut to press the button, slightly hesistant to make the final move. And right before you press your finger down, Namjoon stealthily tilts the handle towards the left. Oblivious to the change, you bob your head excitedly along with the music as the the two of you watch the claw coming down and catches the koala right in the centre.

You let out a squeal that catches the attention of your neighbours, who consisted of other college students releasing their stress on a Wednesday night. Oh yeah, Namjoon was definitely getting some familiar stares. “Joon! I did it!” You jump up and down whilst slapping your hand against his arm. He happily grins at you in return.

“Yeah, you did.”

The impatience and excitement running in your blood makes you pick up the pillow before it is even released from the claw. And in your arms, the pillow feels exactly as soft as it looks. As you gently brush your hands against the plushie, you notice that the koala’s smile oddly reminds you of Namjoon himself. It takes a short moment before you remember to hand the prize towards Namjoon. “Here! For you.”

If you were trying to hide the fact that you really like the doll as well– you failed miserably. The president was not short of being called ignorant by other girls, but let’s just say that the ignorance was selective. Instead, he just playfully pinches your cheeks and softly shakes his head.

“No, you keep it.” Namjoon pushes the prize back towards you. “You’re the one who got it.”

“Yeah, but I said that I’d win it for yo-”

“I have a lot of stuffed animals in my bedroom already. Don’t worry about it.”

You look up towards Namjoon, “You sure?” He nods in reassurance, lips pulling into a wide grin when you jump up in happiness. If you weren’t so occupied with your newly prized possession, you would be able to see that Namjoon looks at you as if you were the galaxy itself.

“Come on, let’s go.” He nudges you on the shoulder. “I’ll walk you home.”

The walk back was calm with a comfortable silence between the two of you. The stars above twinkled in the clear sky. For the first time since forever, you feel as if you can face Namjoon with a smile again.

Everybody deserves a second chance– you think to yourself.

Sure, Namjoon is your first love, but he was also your friend and confidant before you let your feelings control the best of you. And whatever that happened in your first year, he already apologised. There shouldn’t be a reason for you to hold onto the past if it only makes you miserable.

Your thoughts are interrupted when Namjoon clears his throat.

“It’s your stop.” He tilts his head in the direction of your apartment building– with a smile that has never left his lips for the entire night.

“Oh, right. Sorry, I was totally dazing off-”

“Actually, I have something to tell you.” He speaks up again, unsure whether he should continue. But when you are looking at him without a hint of hostility in your eyes, he takes it as sign to keep going.

“I just– I want to properly apologise for what I did back then.” Namjoon’s eyes stay on your own, unwavering and focused. “I wish I had a good reason, but I really don’t. My judgement was clouded by my peers and– wait no– I shouldn’t blame it on someone else.” His gaze on you lowers, letting his bangs cover his eyes. “I became too engrossed at how others saw me– I wanted to fit in so badly.” A sigh escapes from Namjoon’s lips.

“Joon, it’s okay. I get it.” You walk towards the boy, fingers softly brushing the hair falling down on his face. “We all make mistakes-”

“No, Peanut, it’s not okay.” Namjoon gives himself a moment before continuing. “I wanted to be validated by people who wanted me to be someone I wasn’t. So I did things– things that I shouldn’t have done and…hurt the people that meant the world to me.” He takes a short breath in between. “No, they still mean the world to me.” The last part came out as a soft murmur and Namjoon regretted it instantly.

He needed to tell you how he truly feels about you– no more hiding and being afraid.

You suddenly feel warmth against your hand, finding Namjoon’s hand wrapped around your own, so tightly as if he was afraid that you would disappear. “I must right my wrongs. And this time, I won’t hesitate to chase after what I want.” His brown eyes pierce into yours and all the uneasiness was now determination.

“I won’t let you go– not this time.”

“Just come meet me at the frat house first! The guys miss you, especially Taehyung.” A voice blares through your phone, “I don’t get why you’re suddenly avoiding the place.”

You let out an unamused grunt across the line. “I just– I don’t wanna.” A few seconds of silence pass through before Jungkook speaks again.

“Did something happen?” His voice comes out to be a lot more serious, changing the atmosphere of the conversation immediately. “If one of the guys did anything to you, I swear– ”

“Nothing happened, Kook!” A surge of panic rushes through you, not wanting Jungkook to overreact. “Fine, I’ll come. Meet you in 10?” You can feel Jungkook beaming in victory across the other line.

“See you!” He exclaims before you hang up in him.

The walk to Alpha Sig took less than 10 minutes, but that was considering the fact that you walked in a rather brisk pace. Before you knew it, you find yourself in front of the familiar brown building with white pillars. Upon entering, Jin immediately gives you his warmest smile and greets you.

“Y/N! It’s been a while. Looking for Jungkook?”

A nervous smile casts upon your face, hoping not to dwell in the foyer for too long. Jin doesn’t fail to notice how your eyes were dodgy and looking around the house as if you were searching for someone.

“Or are you avoiding someone?” He teases.

“Maybe– both?” You reply sheepishly.

Jin chuckles to himself, amused to the ordeal that you were going through. “He just left like an hour ago, said something about writing his midterm paper.”

Relief rushes through you as you say thanks to Jin before running up the stairs and heads straight to Jungkook’s room.

As you close the door behind you, Jungkook bounces up from his bed and comes to you with his signature bunny grin. “You’re finally here!” He sings, “God, that 10 minutes felt like forever.”

You can’t help but chuckle at how adorable he was. Sometimes you wonder if Jeon Jungkook is the same infamous campus fuck boy that you first met him as – which brings to you realise, Jungkook hasn’t seem to be sleeping around lately. Not since the two of you have been practically seeing each other every single day. Although the past week has been a little different, with Jungkook sometimes cancelling on you or telling you that he wasn’t in the studio.

Nonetheless– he was still your good friend.

“So, Kook,” You walk to his desk chair and sit down. “What do you want to do today?”

“Actually, I kind of wanted to go to this new vegan place downtown. But I just checked the weather report and it’s going to rain soon.” Jungkook looks like a disappointed toddler who got his candy taken away when he mentions the forecast. “I really wanted to bring you there because I know how much you love that health conscious stuff.”

“It’s alright.” You reassure him, giving him a soft tickle on the chin. “You know I’d always be down for a movie and delivery.”

“But we always do that.” Jungkook furrows his eyebrows, “I want to do more– I don’t know– date stuff?” The last part comes out soft, as if he was shy about saying it.

“Date stuff?” Now this boy was just making you very confused.

Jungkook scratches his ear, looking a little perplexed. “I mean like, dates between friends.” He speaks quickly, unsure himself of where this conversation was heading.

“Jungkook, leave all the fun date ideas and whatnot for when you actually start dating someone that you like.” Your tone is laidback and playful. And for a moment, it almost looks like Jungkook’s eyes are brimming with hidden emotions. You quickly brush away any speculations though, because Jungkook would never– yeah, you definitely thought wrong.

“But when you’re with your good ol’ pal– me. You know I’d be good with just chilling and doing absolutely nothing.”

“But-”

“No buts.” You interrupt him, with a sneaky grin on your face. “Now quickly choose a movie and a place where we can stuff our faces with food from.”

Jungkook looks at you for a short moment before giving you a smile. “Yeah, okay.”

“I’m going to take a quick shower first, okay? The walk here made me kind of sweaty and gross.” When he gives you a brief nod, you walk into his closet to grab a clean towel. It never fails to amuse you how organised Jungkook was when it comes to doing his laundry. Perhaps you should make him start doing your dirty laundry for you. You grab the one with a giant pig nose print on it – that brat bought it especially for you to use – and head to the bathroom. “You better be done choosing when I’m finished!” You pressure the boy behind you, who just laughs and throws his clean t-shirt in your way.”

“Aye aye Captain.”

Stepping out of the bathtub, you pat yourself dry before slipping into Jungkook’s tee and your own sweats. Right before you were about to open the door, you notice that there were voices on the other side. “Is Hobi back?” You mumble to yourself but then realise that it was a female voice. It starts with quiet and unstable sobbing, gradually calming down before the girl whispers her next words.

“Kookie, help me forget. Please.”

There is something unsettling stirring inside of you that made you feel like that things are about to go wrong, very wrong.

Jungkook sighs softly on the other side. “I-I can’t. This is wrong.”

You didn’t want to intrude on Jungkook’s privacy so you decided that it was best to stay in the bathroom until the matter was solved. It wasn’t like you wanted to eavesdrop into their conversation but they were not exactly being discreet with their voices. Silence fills the air before someone speaks again.

“It didn’t stop you from the first time.” It was the girl again.

“Stop mentioning that.” His voice bursts in pain. “I deeply regret for making it happen.” The agony in Jungkook’s voice makes your own heart to ache. And there is only one person you can think of who could make Jungkook suffer like that. “We shouldn’t have done that to J-”

“Well guess what?” She pauses before screaming the next part. “Fuck Jimin!” You start to hear louder sobs on the other side. “I can’t do this anymore, I should have chosen you instead. You wouldn’t have treated me like this, right?”

Jimin? What the hell was going on? All the puzzle pieces come together when you realise that it must be Daeun who was speaking to Jungkook outside, but the conversation was just making you very confused. Your scattered thoughts keep you deeply bothered for a few long minutes, blocking on the noises from outside. You were unsure of when to step outside the bathroom, but you knew that you couldn’t stay in here forever.

Oh screw it. You turn the knob and push the door open.

Stepping out of the bathroom, you were definitely not prepared to see what was in front of you. Lee Daeun was sitting atop of Jungkook – the two of them half dressed and passionately making out and with obvious intentions to go even further.

So this is what Daeun meant by ‘making her forget’.

“What. The. Actual. Fuck.”

You don’t even try to conceal the amount of displeasure in your voice, immediately grabbing the attention of the two bodies on the bed. When Jungkook sees you in his vision– it was like he has woken up from a trance – his eyes widen as he cusses under his breath. Jungkook quickly pushes Daeun off of him and sit upright in attempt to gain whatever composure he had left.

“F-fuck. Y/N, I can explain.” He stutters, flustered and ashamed of whatever that was going on. Jungkook struggles to fix his pants as Daeun sits on the corner of his bed with her head down.

You were not proud of your bad temper, but at this moment it was really something that you couldn’t control.

“This really crosses the line, Jeon.” You hiss, no patience to listen to what he had to say. “I didn’t give a shit when you were just sleeping around, but ruining relationships? And atop of that, a relationship between your two close friends?” Stepping towards Jungkook, you refuse to break any eye contact before whispering your next words.

“Now that’s low.”

Your statement has undoubtedly stab Jungkook right where it hurts the most. He lowers his head in shame, unable to face you. Instead, it’s another voice that speaks up– one that you were not very fond of.

“Stop criticising when you have no idea what is going on!” Daeun glares at you from the corner of his bed, eyes red and swollen from the crying. “Kookie has just been helping me with my problems with Jimin.”

Now you know that it must be your bias speaking, but you just didn’t have the tolerance to deal with Daeun and her little victim act. Not right now.

“No offence, Daeun.” Your laugh was humourless. “But I wasn’t talking to you.” You seethe. Before she can retaliate, Jungkook shoots a glare at her way to make her quiet down.

A few moments of silence sits dangerously in the atmosphere. You feel like your mentality was going haywire with all the emotions running inside of you. Anger? Disappointment? Or was it heartbreak?

Right before you decided that you did not want to be in this room anymore, Jungkook speaks up. He runs his fingers through his hair, looking visibly distressed.

“Daeun, do you think you can go home first?” He says softly, “I need to talk to Y/N.”

She nods timidly as she dresses herself and makes her way to the door. Right before she exits, Daeun gives the two of you another glance and leaves.

When you are positive that she has left, you find yourself releasing a breath that you didn’t know you were holding. Energy strained and tired, you turn your back and start walking towards Hoseok’s bed to sit down.

To be completely honest, you had no idea how to face this situation. You aren’t sure of how you were supposed to feel in this situation.

‘You are his friend, nothing more.’ These words loops in your head before you start talking again.

“Jungkook, I can’t help you get over this heartbreak if you keep walking right into it.” You whisper. “Can’t you see that all of this is really unhealthy?”

Jungkook finally looks up and makes eye contact with you. His eyes are lost– so fragile as if they will shatter if you were not careful. “She said that she will leave Jimin soon. And-” He smiles weakly at you. “I really believe that-”

And that pisses you off – all your attempts to help Jungkook when he didn’t even want to be helped. It was frustrating to watch him put himself in this situation, he deserves so much better. You knew the next words would hurt him, but they were also necessary.

“If she had the intention of leaving Jimin, she would’ve done it before she start ‘this’ with you! She is using you for her own selfish reasons.” You don’t even realise how fervent your voice has gotten. “You are just her toy, Jungkook.”

The anger in his eyes almost frightens you, he has never looked at you with so much resentment. Jungkook’s fists are clenched as he starts walking in your direction, stopping when his face was right in front of yours.

“Why can’t you just be happy for me!” Jungkook has never raised his voice at you like this. “You know what?” He exasperates, “This is why I didn’t want to tell you. I knew you’d judge me like this.” A low growl sits in his throat. “Do you just want everyone to be miserable and pathetic like you?”

The moment that those words left from his lips, he could feel regret flowing through his veins.

“Fuck. I-I don’t mean it that wa-”

His hand reaches out to grab onto your wrists, but before he could – you had taken a step back and the look in your eyes make Jungkook feel disgusted at himself. He is struggling to put the words he actually meant to say together but when he searches for your eyes again, you had already left him alone in his room.

You slam the door shut behind you, skidding to a stop when you see the boys staring right at you. Jin tries to give you a hug but your hand gently brushes it away. No, you couldn’t break down right in front of them, not when Jungkook was just right behind. Without saying another word to them, you ignored their worried expressions and sprint down the stairs.

Jungkook was right, it was raining outside.

#how times does oc have to walk in on kook with another girl #i'm starting to support joonie as i write this #is my bias showing #r.heroine #jungkook angst #jungkook scenarios #jungkook scenario #btswriters #btsimagines #bts fanfic #jungkook fanfic #bts angst #bts fluff #bangtan boys #bts #bangtan #jungkook x reader

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hopevorld · 6 years

Text

— fragile; myg

pairing: gang!yoongi x reader genre/warnings: angst, very brief mention of injuries

#57 from the drabble game: “You could have died! I could have lost you!”

The morning sun peeks through the blinds and you can’t bring yourself to open your eyes as you roll over in the bed you share with your boyfriend, blindly reaching out an arm to pull him closer but instead of feeling Yoongi curled up beside you, you’re met with the cold sheet where he should be.

You frown, thinking back to last night when he’d woken you up whilst he was shifting about in bed, telling you that he’s just getting a glass of water and you should go back to sleep, I’ll be back in a second.

Moving to sit against the headboard of the bed, you grab your phone on the bedside table and turn off airplane mode, allowing the notifications to come through after shutting the world out last night. Scrolling through the many emails and Facebook notifications you’d acquired overnight, you come across... 5 missed calls from Jimin and in total 24 messages from Hoseok and Taehyung which was a very uncommon occurrence. The most you’d get from them is 2 from Taehyung asking for music recommendations and 1 from Hoseok asking if Yoongi is awake to send him a file for their music projects.

[1:04am] kim taehyung:

____? it’s hyung 😓

he’s in trouble

its an emergency, jimin tried calling u

please answer

[1:32am] jung hoseok:

Yoongi got into some trouble, we’re @ the hospital with him rn... I’ll explain when you get here

Come as soon as you see this, ____. He needs you

You reread the messages again and again because it feels like some sort of dream, the most trouble Yoongi got into whilst you were together was when he broke the speed limit on the way back to your apartment after a long night full of suggestive comments and touches.

You’re out of the door and in your car before your brain can even process it, phone shoved into the pocket of the first jacket you came across and foot coming down hard on the gas as you pull out of the driveway and speed to the hospital, to Yoongi.

The drive to the hospital was fast, but not fast enough and the moments between and leaving the house and being on the motorway are a blur.

Thoughts and scenarios run through your head at every red light you stop at; did someone try to break into your apartment? Did he go out for some air and get killed? You feel the tears begin to form in your eyes but you wish them away with a shake of your head, speeding down the lane as soon as the light turns amber.

“Yoongi,” is the first thing that leaves your lips when you reach the reception desk of the Hospital, voice dry and shaky as you attempt to collect your thoughts.

“Min Yoongi, my boyfriend, he-”

“Ah, yes.” the receptionist responds, eyes softening with sympathy and voice calm. She gestures to the empty section of seats behind you. “If you take a seat here, someone will take you to him as soon as they can.”

Your head tells you to argue, put up a fight and refuse to just take a seat because your boyfriend could be dead for all you know but you nod, teeth biting at your lower lip as you slump into the seat.

The awful thoughts don’t leave your head and you can’t help but think the worst as you sit and stew in the metal chair, eyes fixed on Yoongi’s sliders you’d slipped on in your haste to get to him. You don’t know how long you had zoned out for but you’re quickly brought back to reality when a hand gently touches your shoulder.

“Miss?” you meet eyes with a man dressed in scrubs, clipboard hugged against his chest.

“I’m Dr. Song. If you’re here to see Mr Min I can take you to him now, if you’d like. I have been looking after him since he arrived and he is now in a stable condition after his surgery.”

You nod, standing up and following the doctor as he walks down the corridor to the left, then the right, then the left again. You bite at your fingernails (a nervous habit that Yoongi had told you to drop months ago, it’s unhygienic he’d say) as the man finally stops walking and pushes a small blue door with the number 24 above it open, ushering you inside before telling you he’ll be back later to check over him.

Thanking him, you walk into the bright room and the sob that leaves your lips is loud enough to catch Yoongi’s attention. He turns his head in your direction, hand weakly reaching out for you and you run to him, the air in the room cold as it hits your body.

“Wha-” you can’t even begin to form words, eyes raking over him and the bruises on his face and arms that you can’t even count on both hands.

“What happened to you? Where are Hoseok and Tae... and Jimin? I cant- I don’t understand...” you’re gripping the side of his bed now, practically sobbing over him and he brings a hand up to cover your own.

He wordlessly moves his hand to push his gown aside and you see what you assume to be a stab wound of some sort, now stitched up neatly and free from any blood.

Your mouth drops, hand gripping the bed tighter as your eyes bore into his abdomen, images flying through your head of how he must’ve looked and felt. “How? Where did you go last night? What did you do?”

Yoongi takes a deep breath, wincing as reaches for the beds remote so he can use it to sit up. You step back and take a seat in the small armchair at his bedside, still biting at your nails as you wait for his answer.

“I can’t tell you here,” he sighs, staring straight ahead of him so he doesn’t have to see the upset in your eyes.

“Yoongi please!” you cry, voice echoing throughout the large room. He closes his eyes, lips pursed as he tilts his head back to rest on the puffy pillow below him.

“I’ll tell you if you promise not to freak out.”

You don’t respond, eyes wide as you wait for him to continue and Yoongi opens an eye to look over at you, reaching a hand out for you to hold which you gladly take.

“It was a gang, ____. Me and some others got into some shit a few years ago, before we’d even met, and they just so happened to be in the city last night. They wanted money that I owed them from years ago but I didn’t have it. I went to make peace but that’s clearly not the alternative they were after.”

“So they stabbed you?! Why didn’t you tell me about this Yoongi, we could’ve got the Police involved- we could’ve stopped this from happening!” You gesture towards his body, brows pulled together in a frown and bottom lip quivering as more tears threaten to spill from your eyes.

“It’s not that easy, you don’t know what they’re like. It’s not as bad as you think.”

“You could have died, Yoongi! I could have lost you! How can you say it’s not as bad as I think?!” The tears fall from your eyes as though a dam just broke and you struggle to catch your breath at the thought of him dying next time.

Yoongi squeezes your hand tight, feeling himself well up at the sight of you so upset over him, over this. He doesn’t know what to say, can’t find the right words because he knows you’re right. He could have died, he was just lucky that they ran off before they could do more damage to him.

The two of you sit in silence for 5 minutes at the least, your hand still grasped tightly in his and the only sound being both of your breathing and the rhythmic beeping of the machine beside him.

You struggle to collect your thoughts, your boyfriend in trouble with a gang? Your innocent, funny, handsome boyfriend being stabbed by some pathetic group of boys from his past... you never could’ve pictured it happening.

“Why were the boys here with you?” you speak up, squeezing at his hand and he jumps slightly, eyes fluttering open and looking at you.

“I called them before I met the gang so they’d know where I was, they were already aware of them and what they were after so they understood. I told them to go home, they’d been here all night.”

“Ah,” you breathe. You want to be mad at him but you can’t, you don’t understand his situation but you don’t want to push it- not when he’s in such a state.

“The Police will want to talk to you, you know?”

“I know, babe.” he forces a smile, thumb rubbing comfortably over the back of your hand. “I’m sorry, I didn’t want to have to put you through this.”

You smile back, eyes softening because when Yoongi says he’s sorry, he means it. Standing up from your seat, you make sure you don’t let go of his hand whilst you lean over him to leave a soft kiss on his forehead.

“I’m just glad you’re alive, honestly. Get some sleep, you must be tired.”

Yoongi hums in agreement, eyes closing as he settles into the bed

“I love you,” you bring his hand up to your mouth and kiss his bruised knuckles, taking a deep breath in order to compose yourself before the floodgates open again. He doesn’t respond though, already snoring just as he does when he’s at home in bed with you.

You gently let go of his hand and place it beside him on the bed, walking out of the room and into the corridor. Leaning against the wall, you pull your phone out from your pocket and open up the messenger app.

[10:17am] you:

come to the hospital when you can, i need the full story

[message sent to multiple contacts: park jiminie, jung hoseok, kim taehyung]

#not quite gang yoongi but almost #dkdslsls sorry anonnie #text #drabble game #yoongi angst #yoongi smut #yoongi fluff #yoongi scenarios #bts smut #BTS drabbles #yoongi drabble #bts angst #ley's #bts fluff #bts scenarios #min yoongi #suga #bts reactions

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embracehappy · 6 years

Text

Don’t Fight It | Shawn Mendes Imagine

Summary: You are on vacation, visiting a friend, when you accidentally befriended a coffee shop barista who does her best to set you up with her other “friend”

a/n: This is the first fic I’ve written. Sorry it’s so long. I really liked the idea behind it, and I’m pretty proud of how it turned out. Please please please let me know what you think! I am open and accepting to constructive criticism!! But I also really love positive feedback <3

Part 2

Warnings: Swearing, Angst (i think?)

Word count: 3.9k

It was ironic, really: how y’all met. It was pure happen stance. You weren’t even supposed to be there. One night you just got really tired of not being able to see one of her best friends in the whole world. So, you booked a ticket. And that was that.

The next thing you know, it is four weeks later and you are hopping off a plane.

“Y/N!!!” You hear Eden S C R E A M as you exit security. You embrace your friend in a hug so tight that you lose your ability breathe for a moment. As you rock back and forth, an old man walks by and mumbles toward you both: “That is true happiness right there, never let it go.”

Wiping the tears forming in your eyes, Eden helps steady yourself as y’all walk towards where Eden had parked. You hadn’t seen Eden in over a year, causing the mild tears of joy.

You had never been so excited to be in a foreign place. You had never even been to Canada, and here you are in Toronto. Eden was lucky. She transferred out of your college after freshman year. It broke her heart to say goodbye to the friend group, but she just really needed to find a school with a better Environmental Science program. So, she went home to Washington DC. She had been working for the last year at her Aunt’s company when she wasn’t in classes. Somehow, she got a promotion, and then another, and then one more, and now she’s in Toronto. (You aren’t even completely sure what she does; she was only a secretary when she was first hired at the company.)

~~ “Are you ready?” Eden asks as she is turning her lock.

“Oh just let me in!” You squeal, excited to start your girls weekend. You push past her into the apartment and quickly notice that her Pinterest boards were not a waste. Eden lives a one bedroom apartment, somewhere in downtown Toronto. It may have been small, but it was gorgeous. It was the perfect mix of vintage and modern. White and sleek, but with tasteful splashes of dark wood and antiques. You are quick to notice the small tree in the corner of the room.

“Well that’s a fake plant” you scoff to your friend.

“Is not!” She fights back.

“You have many things, Eden, but a green thumb is not one!” You say as you walk over and feel it to ensure you are correct. You are, it’s fake.

“Whatever!” She yells, carrying your small carry-on bag into the bedroom. “Is this really all you brought??” Eden yells to you.

“Well, yeah! I’m only staying for four days!!”

~~ Two days have passed. You’ve been enjoying the trip of your life in Toronto with Eden. However, last night got the better of you and you stayed up way too late watching movies. Knowing that it was the one last Netflix original that did y’all in, you were both planning on sleeping in. However, your body had other ideas.

You jolted awake sometime around 9am. You decided to be a little selfish. As much as you love Eden, you wanted to go explore. You were missing your usual morning routine and were desperate to go on a jog. So you decide that you might as well do both, explore and jog.

Quietly slipping into your leggings and clean sports bra, you are sure not to wake Eden as you grab her house key, along with your wallet and IPhone. You wander over to Eden’s closet. Surely, she has something you can borrow. Due to your light packing, you only brought one sweatshirt. The same sweatshirt that you accidentally ruined last night by spilling ice cream all down the front.

You almost laugh out-loud as you pull a grey sweatshirt off a hanger.

I can’t believe she still owns this!? She was always so obsessed with his music!

You slip the crewneck over your head. Giggling to yourself when you look down and see the “I would date u but ur not shawn mendes” plastered across your chest.

It’s only fitting, you are in Toronto, after all! Usually you would never wear something that would blatantly label you as a tourist, but you’re only here for a short stay. And, it’s not even your sweatshirt!

Eden had been the one to turn you on to Shawn Mendes’ music. She first played you his album when you were studying for finals during first semester. After that, you had to admit, you were a bit addicted to his music. The melodies just had a way of making you move. They gave you a weird feeling somewhere deep inside you that you didn’t know how to explain.

You hadn’t listened to Shawn Mendes’ music in a while. So, deciding you might as well be extra ironic, you chose the SHAWN MENDES playlist on Spotify, hit shuffle, and step out the door.

~~ You ran for about a half hour, though the streets of downtown, before you are quickly realizing that you are lost. You slow your pace and start looking around, thankful you are in Toronto and not Montreal. (Eden had been telling you about a weekend trip she took to Montreal, but it was a disaster because there was a lot more French than she was planning for.) You know you can’t be that far from Eden’s apartment building, simply because you were careful not to go too far. You had purposely gone in circles, running down the same few streets more than once. But, you had gotten just a bit too adventurous on your last round and now you’re standing in an area you don’t recognize.

You start walking. Actually, you start wandering. You are trying to spot that one really tall and pointy tower, knowing if you can find it, you could correct yourself back into the right direction.

You walk for about 5 more minutes before you give up. All you can think about is a coffee shop that you had seen two blocks back. It has been consuming your thoughts because you are quite hungry now. You decide to turn around and walk back to it, feeling like the coffee shop is calling you.

~~ It is 9:45am when you walk into the shop. A very friendly looking red head smiles to you. The shop is empty. It is clear that the morning rush had already come through and now this local was just staying open in an attempt to be nice to any non-regulars.

“Hey hun! Don’t be shy! I promise I won’t bite!” She smiles to you as cautiously walk up to the counter, noticing her nametag reads “Anna”.

“I would like a medium vanilla latte… um, please.”

“Sure thing!” She says as she goes to prepare your drink, flashing you a smile again. “Can I get your name?” She calls to you from behind the machine.

“Y/N!” You say to her. Suddenly realizing that you are now smiling too.

“Y/N, huh. Pretty name!”

She must have recognized your accent: “If you don’t mind, we don’t get a whole lot of Americans through this shop. So, I’m officially declaring you my friend!”

You are taken aback by her forwardness. You are not sure if it’s just her personality or a Canadian thing.

“Oh. Ok!” You respond. “Well, I am officially declaring you my first Canadian friend!” You then explain to her how you had been visiting a friend from college, but were adventuring out on your own this morning.

The two of you really hit it off, becoming basically best friends almost immediately. It must be because you are in a different country, but you have no problem with opening up to the stranger. You even exchange Instagram’s at one point. Sitting at the bar, you discuss your whole life with her. She listens as you tell her about your exes and your family. And then you do the same when she talks about her girlfriend and her family. You are about the same age, so it is easy for y’all to relate to each other stories. You are laughing, about how you both had a family cat named Steven, when you hear the door chime.

“Anna!” you hear a booming voicing behind you call out. The voice is loud, but not intimidating. And vaguely familiar? He sounds like he could be about yours and Anna’s ages. “Are you actually replacing me! I thought Sunday morning talks were OUR thing!” He says, drawing out the “our” in an unbelievably cute way. You cannot believe you are actually thinking someone’s voice was cute.

Suddenly, you feel his presence leaning up against the counter next to you. The next thing you know, a heavy arm is being rested around your shoulders, pulling you into him.

“Anna! When I said I wanted to meet your girlfriend, I didn’t mean for you to bring her to OUR morning coffee date!”

You saw Anna’s face turn bright tomato red with shock. The arm’s owner must have realized that he was mistaken, as you feel the arm tense and lift up slightly.

“Anna… please tell me this is your girlfriend and not a complete stranger that I just put my arm around…”

Anna responds sheepily: “Well…. Um…. She’s not a stranger… to me…. She my newest friend!”

Anna’s face is no longer red as she is now grinning. “Shawn, meet Y/N!”

Shawn turns to look at you and for the first time you actually look up at him. And all you can see is his jaw line.

Damn.

You can hear Anna begin to speak again: “She’s American! She’s here for the weekend, visiting a friend from college. She’s… like... actually super cool and I need you to be really friendly and open and to not make any judgements okay, Shawn?”

You look back at Anna and see how she is suddenly giving him a frantic look. She’s trying to communicate something to him with her gestures. You look up at him again.

He is staring intensely at you. His eyes raking up and down you, pausing momentarily on your breast. You can’t quite figure out which emotions are hiding behind his eyes. You can’t even figure out what is going on between Anna and him.

And then it hits you.

The sweatshirt. The jawline. Shawn.

Shawn Mendes has his arm around you.

~~ He looks older than you remember him looking. You hadn’t been following his recent activity. So, you guess it makes sense though, for him to look so much older. He is your age, after all. And you definitely don’t look the same from the first time you heard his music.

Shawn’s arm is quickly retracted. It looks like he has chosen to be cautious, that’s how his eyes seem to appear at least.

He stumbles over his words when he speaks to you. “How did you find my favorite shop?” he says in an accusatory tone. “I’m so careful when I come here. The last thing I need is a superfan to ruin our mornings. I thought I told you to text me, Anna!” Shawn’s attention is now focused on Anna, who is getting very defensive very quickly.

Anna is throwing her arms up and begins raising her voice at him, something about how he needs to trust her and to just stop accusing her new friend of something.

You aren’t really paying attention.

Your head is spinning. You can finally get a good look at him. He is wearing a pink hoody under a jean jacket, black jeans, and a classic pair of black boots. And then your body goes numb and all you can hear is the word “superfan” rotating around in your head. Your vision goes blurry.

You fall off the bar stool.

~~ You’ve passed out. You can’t move or see, but you can hear. You can overhear Anna and Shawn.

“OH SHIT” Anna screams! An “oh my god” falls out of Shawn’s hushed voiced. “HELP HER YOU ASSHOLE”

You can feel a strong hand grabbing your arm and another suddenly on your back. You were being gently rolled to lay on your back.

“I CANT BELIEVE YOU REACTED LIKE THAT” Anna screams again. “Well I’m not going to pick her up while she’s unconscious!” “No! Not that! EARLIER! You dumbass! I didn’t text you because she’s insanely cool and you’re going to like her!” “SHE just WANTS you to like her, Anna! She’s a SUPERFAN!! She’s just trying to get CLOSE to ME! HELL! Maybe even she FAKED passing out! How do I know she hasn’t already tweeted my location to hundreds of followers on her FANACCOUNT--” “—OH MY GOD SHAWN! Did you even she her! Her phone is over HERE on the counter! And She didn’t move a muscle as soon as you wrapped YOUR ARM AROUND HER!”

You suddenly feel your body return to you. As you begin moving, a hush falls over the two. Next thing you know, you can feel Shawn next to you, trying to coax you out of your fog. Saying gentle things like “That’s it. Take it easy. I’ve got you.” Shawn’s helping you lift your head.

“I only want you to be happy” You hear Anna mumble to him. “You’re not my match maker” He responds, almost inaudible.

~~ As soon as you completely come to, anger floods your body. You were livid.

Yes, you were a fan, but in no way were you a “SUPERFAN” and Shawn should NOT have risen his voice at your new friend.

You sit up. Testing your words: “I… I am not…” You feel confident as your anger is quickly becoming rage.

“I am NOT a SUPERFAN! And HONESTLY…. The FACT that you ASSUMED as much really wants me to REVOKE my status of REGULAR mediocre FAN… WHO had NO IDEA that this is YOUR FAVORITE coffee shop in all of FUCKING TORONTO!! IM just HERE to visit a FRIEND and I HAPPENED to make another FRIEND! IM SORRY we CANT have the SAME FRIENDS, YOUR HIEGHNESS. I didn’t KNOW you OWNED all YOUR favorite SPOTS in Toronto!... YOU are an ASSHOLE! I KNOW how this works! YOU’RE just being KIND TO ME right now because you HAVE TO BE! HEAvon forbid something SHOWS up on the INTERNET about how THE Shawn MENDES treated a fan POORLY! I heard what you SAID!! You think IM SOME CRAZY FAN with a FANACCOUNT and all the SHIT!”

You notice Shawn’s face growing bright red and he is staring at you in bewilderment. Anna is smirking. But you kept firing off:

“I CANT Believe you! All you FAMous people are the same! YOURE ALL STUCK UP ASSHOLES! And to think that your fans actually think you’re WHOLESOME! WHAT THE FUCK, SHAWN MENDES?!?!”

You finally stop. He is hanging his head low. Anna glances down to you. “Couldn’t have said it better myself, hun.”

“But….. But your sweatshirt…?” Shawn questions timidly.

“It’s my friends FUCKING sweatshirt.” You say with a little less anger in your voice, but still firm. “In fact, I remember when she bought it. I made fun of her for A WEEK about it! I only wore it so that when I got back to her apartment, after my run, we could laugh about it...” you trail off, suddenly realizing that you are sharing way more information than you should with the asshole standing in front of you.

But you couldn’t help it. You had the weird feeling, that usually was caused by his music, currently fluttering about in your stomach. You were angry but you still wanted to talk to him. You decide instead to shut up, ignoring your gut.

Anna is helping you stand now, placing you into a chair at one of the tables. Shawn follows behind her like a sad puppy.

“Okay. You both stay here, eh. I’m going to get Y/N some water.” Anna says before she disappears into the back.

Anna has been gone a lot longer that she should’ve been. You assume this probably has something to do with those last comments you overheard when you were on the ground. Or you think you overheard. They were so quiet and quick at the end that maybe you may have hallucinated them.

You weren’t sure. Because of it, you didn’t know how to continue.

~~ In an attempt to ground yourself, you try reflecting on the current situation:

Okay, so I’m sitting in an empty coffee shop with Shawn Mendes. And I just YELLED at him? And now he’s looking like I just told him his dog died. What the fuck is even happening right now…

A few more seconds pass. You are about to give up waiting for Anna and just leave altogether. You’re really confused and just want to return to Eden’s apartment, when suddenly:

“I’m sorry…”

“What?” You say, shocked.

“I’m sorry.” Shawn says with more confidence. “I didn’t mean you any harm. I just… I need to be careful. I thought I could trust Anna… Er… I can trust Anna. But for a moment there, when I saw you, and then my name on your.. er… your friend’s sweatshirt… I… I panicked.”

There’s an awkward moment of silence. You didn’t know how to respond. You definitely weren’t expecting an asshole celebrity to be apologizing to you today… or any day for that matter.

Must be a Canadian thing.

Shawn looks up. His eyes are a little puffy and you can tell he’s trying not to cry.

Nope. This is a Shawn Mendes thing.

“Um… It’s ok… I totally shouldn’t have snapped at you… I understand why you need to be careful…. I guess…..”

Your gaze meets Shawn’s and he holds for longer than you expect. He seems to be accepting what you said, but still looks very sad.

“NO…no.. It’s totally my fault... I deserved to be yelled at… I treated you like shit. I’m so sorry.”

His eyes are still locked on yours.

“We haven’t even had a proper introduction yet” He says extending his hand.

“um… I’m Shawn” His mouth is curling up a bit at the corners, flashing you a bashful smile. His other hand is rubbing the back of his neck and for a moment his eyes glance to the ground. And you think you see him beginning to blush.

“Y/N” you say with a bit more confidence than he, but the lack of air in your lungs takes you by surprise. You can feel yourself blushing with embracement.

~~ Anna has returned with 3 waters. She places them down on the table and then walks over to the coffee shop’s door. Flipping the open sign to “closed” and locking the door. When she walks back, she sees the confused look on your face because she quickly shoots out: “I always close up when Shawn comes in… ya know… To give him… privacy.. from fans…”

Shawn looks up to her like he’s about to say something, but then everyone’s attention is quickly taken to the counter, where you phone is vibrating. Anna runs over and grabs it, running it back to you.

“It’s Eden, hun.”

You answer the phone to a frantic Eden: “OH my god!! Why didn’t you answer! I’ve called you three times already! I saw you weren’t here and I figured you went on a run, but then you didn’t answer and I assumed the worst!--”

You cut her off: “Eden! OMG Eden! Breathe! I’m fine! I’m in a coffee shop! I didn’t notice my phone going off because I fainted--”

“--OMG You fainted Why?? Are you Ok-”

“Yes, Eden. I’m fine. I just fainted because…” You glance up and see Shawn and Anna staring at you. Shawn is giving you an interesting look. Almost like he’s studying you. Your eyes linger on his briefly, “because… well… I’ll tell you about it later. It’s not important. Anyway, what are we doing today... I leave on Monday…”

“How about you come back to my apartment and we can discuss that. I want to make sure you’re feeling ok?”

“Yeah sure, I’ll come back. But I didn’t faint because I don’t feel well… I fainted because I… I’ll explain it later…” you say as you stand up. Blood rushes to your head and you slump back down into your seat. “Actually… maybe you can come pick me up… I’m.. I’m at…” you glance up towards Anna to get the name of the coffee shop, but instead hear Shawn speak up: “No… I’ll take you… tell your friend.”

You try to cover the mic on your phone and pull it from your face. “No. You don’t have too. Eden can come get me. Really. I don’t want to be an inconvenience. Seriously it’s--”

“--NO. I made you faint. It won’t be an inconvenience it’s literally the least I can do… please?”

You feel the blood in your head and you can’t seem to find the will to fight Shawn. “Fine, I guess.” You to say to him, shaking your head in annoyance.

Back on the phone with Eden: “Actually, I got a ride. I’ll be back at you place soon, okay?

But Eden is quick to catch on, clearly hearing everything you and Shawn had said: “Woah, woah, woah… First of all, if you’re not okay, I should be the one picking you up. You’re my guest! And also: Who MADE you faint? That’s… like…. Not ok? Are you sure you’re fine?”

“Eden, I swear I’m fine.”

“Since when did Y/N decide to accept rides from strangers? You’re clearly not yourself… you would never get into a car with someone you don’t trust! And it takes you FOREVErrrrr to trust anybody!”

“Eden it’ll be fine. I’m fine. I definitely think that the person I’m about to get a ride with is trustworthy. And I know his friend. She’s cool. It’ll be fine.”

“Okay fine, whatever. But if I have to explain to your mom why you went missing in Canada, you better believe that I’ll kill you, even if you are already dead.”

“Oh my gosh, Eden. I’ll be fine.”

“Send me your location. So, I can track you. Just to be safe.”

“Yes Ma’am. See ya soon.” You say jokingly as you hang up.

You quickly share your location with Eden.

God bless IPhones.

You look back up at Shawn and Anna. Shawn hasn’t taken his eyes off you. But for some reason it doesn’t feel creepy.

Anna is looking very pleased.

“Great! So you have a ride back. I’m glad. You’ll be safe. Shawn’s a really great driver.” Anna casually says as she stands from the table and shoots another look to Shawn.

Shawn is now standing and putting his arm around your waist, helping you to your feet.

“Oh, no I can do it.” You protest. But your comment only makes Shawn tighten his grip.

“Don’t fight it, hun!” Anna calls back to you. She has already begun bouncing towards the back of the coffee shop.

You think about what she said. Not quite certain what she was referring to with “it”. As Shawn and you move closer to the door. You are quickly considering that you and Shawn are about to be in a car alone, together….

“Don’t fight it, hun!”

#shawn mendes #shawn mendes imagine #shawn #mendes #shawn mendes angst #shawn mendes x reader #shawn mendes fanfiction #shawn mendes fanfic #shawn imagine #shawn fanfiction #shawn fanfic #embracehappy #dont fight it

93 notes · View notes

likeadove · 6 years

Text

Anonymous said: just wanted to tell u that i finished wcpah on a train and the fic almost made me miss my stop it was THAT good had to run off the last second hahahahah

Anonymous said: holy fuck bethany you have no idea I'm so sad about this book ending bc for real its gotten me through a lot these past few months (been reading since chap 6 baby) and honestly my only source of happiness after this will be nest of salt. From the bottom of my heart thank you so much for everything youve doen with this story. Its magnificent. (and you wrote the smut wonderfully don't even worry)

Anonymous said: I just can’t. So good. I already want to start begging for one shots.

Anonymous said: That was fkn stupendous and I am so grateful to be able to read your stories <3

Anonymous said: I actually screamed when I saw the lyrics for this chapter. Thank God none of my roommates are home because the whole thing had a me screaming/sobbing. Like how did you manage to make that so beautiful? I cried? They love each other so much and you showed that in the way they did it.

Anonymous said: ben and rey crying after doing it is the most canon thing ever canoned

Anonymous said: I just wanted to let you know that the most recent chapter of WCPAH is amazingly beautiful. it made me sad because ive never had that good of sex lol. your writing was fantastic, everything felt so real and i think you waited until the perfect time in their story for this to happen. you did a fantastic job! Thanks for sharing it with us! :)

Anonymous said: that ending killed me oh my gosh. im smiling like an idiot

Anonymous said: I can't believe it's almost over. It's so amazing and I love it so much and I'm just so sad and happy and idk man. You've done it, like really done it, knocked it out of the park. I'm experiencing such a wide array of emotions and I seriously don't know what to do.

Anonymous said: Me right now: 😭😃😥😍😖🤯😵😏😱😫😘😞😁

Anonymous said: literally one of the most satisfying things i have ever read. you did it. you gone dun it. cannot remember why i wanted them to get down when she was 18 anymore haaa. This is oh so very right. All equal parts sexy, sweet, hot, beautiful. Thank you from the bottom of my reylo heart. what will i do without these two and your updates!!?! excuse me while i re read this chapter for the 4th time. because duhhhhhhhh

Anonymous said: lemme just say my thoughts on the last chapter- aaaaaaaaaaAAAAAAAAHHHHHHHH im telling you now im gonna cry like a baby when WCPAH is over bc it's been such a wonderful ride and ive been around since chapter 1 was posted and i stumbled across the then baby fic and had never listened to the music Ben and rey do until recently and i found chapter 1 to be cute so i thought id stick around for chapter 2 totally unaware that almost 60 chapters later i myself not wanting it to end. Thank you for this❤

Anonymous said: literally cried when I saw you updated. woman you have done it. you wrote possibly the best smut/fan fiction these eyes have ever read. blown away from the way you lived up to hype for this sex scene- like surpassed my wildest expectations&gave us perfection. ben was so eager, aggressive&gentle all at the same time. we could count on rey to take matters into her own hands. girl knows what she wants. cannot wait for them to fill the house with their art, memories, milkshake machine, dogs&kiddos.

Anonymous said: So, it took me about half an hour to read through this chapter (56), because I had to stop to internally scream, or digest the fact that IT(!!) was finally happen like every two words. Words cannot describe the satisfaction that this chapter gave me. FUCKING FINALLY!!!!! You killed it, as per usual, and I am continuously in awe of your skill. I’m not ready for this to be over, but thank you, from the bottom of my heart, for letting us come along on this ride with you, and Ben and Rey. ❤️

Anonymous said: Idk if this is gonna sound really fucking lame to you, but your story gave me a reason to look forward to a new day, thank you for this! I am so glad i found your story, you had me at "90s grunge Ben Solo"

Anonymous said: First of all, I love you. Second of all, you are a master and a bloody wizard. Third, the last chapter from Ben's POV would make me die and go to heaven. I want to know his thoughts and feelings during *the scene*. Is that on the horizon? If not, that's ok - I'm happy with anything you give us! My brain keeps going over all the saucy details and starts fluttering when I think about what might come next. Sorry for being weird but I FEEL SO MANY EMOTIONS AND IT'S BECAUSE OF YOU.

Anonymous said: That was some pretty dope as shit smut Bethany like holy fuck

Anonymous said: that was literally the best sex scene I have ever read. so real and complex!! favorite fic of all time for sure

Anonymous said: your story came out on week two of my multi month bed-rest-ploza. i have been reading and healing along with these two ever since. thank you for the fluff, distraction, angst, music suggestions and companionship from your story and the world you created. this last update was everything i could have wanted and more. so sad that this story is wrapping up soon. excited to see where you take these two and reading more of your stories. <3

Anonymous said: I just wanna say that 'we could plant a house' was such an important story for me. It actually inspired me to write again IT WAS JUST THAT GOOD. I love you and I want to thank you for sharing this beautiful, heartbreaking fic with us what a fucking blessing honestly you're a goddess, never stop writing ❤️ And like yo when's the next update I'm dying

Anonymous said: Okay so I’ve been here from about the beginning and omg what am I going to do without this fic?! This is definitely my favourite reylo fic and what am I going to read once it’s gone?! I love it so much!!

You are all beautiful, wonderful people. Sometimes it overwhelms me (in a good way) when y’all say that this story helped you through a rough time or inspired you to write/do art again, because it’s so surreal that my silly fic I started in January to get out my Reylo angst and give me an excuse to listen to a lot of 90′s music could possibly have this effect on others. I’m so glad my work means this much to you guys, that you guys have continued to read despite how many times I came for your feels or made you cry. You guys mean the world to me; it’s been so lovely getting to go on this journey with you all. I honestly don’t know what I’m going to do once it’s finished. Be very depressed, I expect. We can all send each other virtual hugs and cookies <3

#answering the anons #welp now im emotional

29 notes · View notes

sehunpeachy · 6 years

Text

passengers | pt. 1

gif by @kthspjm

pt. 1 | pt. 2 (coming soon)

⇒pairing: jimin x reader

⇒genre: passengers! au | fluff, angst, eventual smut

⇒length: 17k

⇒summary: it gets a little lonely in outerspace, but at least he’s there with you, and then 90 years doesn’t seem so far away.

a/n: this oneshot was inspired by the movie passengers, but you absolutely DO NOT need to have watched it or know anything about it to read this. anyways i missed u guys so much and im so happy to write again :)

It was a strange sensation that shot down your bones and ran through your stream. The slits of your eyes attempt to open but they’re immediately shut when they’re struck with a blood vessel-tightening, lurid white. Sounds of machine fill your ears, then stop.

“Good morning, Y/N.”

Your eyebrows furrow and you attempt to speak but your lips part tacky, like glue, and the veins in your throat strain against your skin.

“You’ve been asleep for a long time. It’s okay to be confused.”

The voice sounds female, unfamiliar yet so welcome. It’s close too, almost right in front of your face. The feeling in the pads of your fingers return and you feel the material of leather against your back.

“Can you try opening your eyes for me?”

You peel your eyes open with careful caution. The white strikes you again but you resist closing your eyes. Your vision adjusts a little better, distinguishing the white into shapes, then objects. You’re in some sort of—pod, a glass pod—one you don’t remember getting into.

A woman’s face is in front of you. She stands out remarkably against the background, a smile laced with cordial on her face, a river of black hair resting on her shoulders.

“Do you know where you are?” She says, tilting her head to the side.

Your face twists as you think, drawing a complete blank as you search for an answer. You try to move by shaking your head from side to the side and the bones in your nape crack against each other.

She lifts her head back up, smiling again. “Your name is—Y/N, you’re—twenty-two, your profession is a—technician. You are currently on Starship Sortis, heading towards Planet Epsilon.”

Right. You feel as though something registers in your mind as she says those words. Earth was—dying, or something like that. You won a draw, and you got chosen to go on this—ship. To go to a new planet. Something better than Earth, they told you.

“I—” you try to say but it constrains your throat even more.

“Would you like a glass of water?” Her head’s tilted again.

You nod, feeling blood rush up to your neck.

“Try holding the cup and bringing it to your lips,” she says and an opening forms on the wall of the pod to your side, a mechanical arm bringing in a plastic cup.

You breathe in quickly, then relax. Your fingers drum against the leather material, each ligament clicking painfully. Once the pain subsides, you move your wrist, eliciting a particularly loud ‘click’ from the bones and a dry groan from your mouth.

Your arm moves steadily, each muscle tightening and then slackening, like a breathing organism coming to life. You can now see your hand in your peripheral, hovering unstably by the cup. It moves closer and you flinch when it feels the material. Your hands clench and unclench until you have enough sense to wrap your fingers around the cup.

Once you do so, the mechanical arm unclasps and the sudden weight of the water inside occurs to you, almost dropping it at your feet but stopping yourself just in time.

Bringing it to your lips was the easy part, which you do with shaking hands and slippery fingers, because swallowing seemed almost impossible. Your cracked lips part open, inviting the cold surge of water to enter your mouth but it immediately flows down your throat instead and you feel like you’re about to choke.

“Well done, Y/N.”

You forget about the woman’s presence, and now that you can open your eyes all the way, you can see the ever so slight graininess in her image. The edge of her mouth tilts up, almost automatic.

“Can you try speaking now?”

“Who—” you pause, bringing the cup again for more water. “Who are—you?”

“I’m merely a program used to integrate a newly-awakened passenger back into functionality.” she tilts her head again. “A hologram is a better word.”

Holograms? Yes, you know about holograms. They were abundant back on Earth.

“Would you like to hear about Starship Sortis?”

“I don’t have a—choice,” you choke out.

“For the next three months on the starship, you can enjoy a variety of amenities; including a swimming pool, a bar, and a planetarium with an unforgettable view into outerspace.”

Your eyebrows crease.

“Let’s get you up on your feet so you can properly rest, shall we?” The woman says with a gracious smile. “Feelings of alarm are perfectly normal at this stage.” Her image disappears.

“Alarm—” You ask but it’s too late because the padding behind you clicks into life, pushing you forward out of the pod and onto the floor. “Ah,” you groan in pain, saving your face from meeting the cold tiles beneath with your palms. “The hell?”

Your legs feel stiff, like twigs that could snap if pushed too hard. It takes a few moments before you find the spontaneous strength to push upwards so you can rest on your knees. More muscles click, a groan leave your lips.

You find the opportunity to look around your surroundings. You’re in some sort of hallway, saturated in white. What strikes you off guard is the assembly line of other pods along the wall. Behind you, your own pod closes in on itself with a glass encasing you hadn’t seen until now.

You move to stand up and it’s a brusque feeling of vertigo. Your hand goes out as a search for something to help stabilize you but you fail, instead stumbling steps forward and backward until you can stand upright.

The pods are still fervently on your mind and you limp forward to look through. There’s a woman inside this one. Dark skin, long black hair. Young, around her early twenties.

Your eyes catch a sticker at the bottom with a body of text. You lean in closer;

Name: Eve Walker

Age: 26

Profession: Cardiac surgeon

You look at her again; her eyes are fluttered close, her body frozen in time.

That’s—strange.

Suddenly, drowsiness settles into your figure, washing a feeling of sleepiness over you. “Where—do I go?” You ask to yourself.

Ta-ting. “Do you need assistance around the ship?”

“Jesus,” you turn around, keeping a stifling hand over your heart. The same hologram’s voice sounds from above. “Do you have to listen to everything I say?”

“You required directions to your cabin, did you not?” She asks.

You huff, nodding.

“Take the exit to your left, then the hallway to your right. Your cabin is Room 483.”

“Right, thank you,” you nod again, repeating her words back to yourself. Left, right, 4-8-3.

The exit out the room is a large archway, grand in size and width and lights flicker on when you pass through. Suddenly you’re met with an overwhelmingly big room, closely resembling a torus in infrastructure, characterized with a tall ceiling and more grand archways on each side leading towards more corridors. A hologram of a tree nestled with soil fills the empty space in the middle.

Ta-ting. “Main lobby,” the voice above informs you.

“God, you’re just everywhere, aren’t you?” You mumble, looking up into the ceiling before heading towards the archway on the right. As you get closer, you see the text inscribed above, reading ‘Passenger Cabins’.

The hallway inside is riddled with stainless steel doors, each showcasing a number on the wall beside. You walk along, your feet echoing throughout every step, too tired to think and process anything fully. What was your number again? 4-8-2? Or is it 4-8-3?

You don’t have to remember for yourself because a door opens just as you walk past, ‘483’ decorated in silver by the opening.

The room is small, compact to say the least. A twin bed huddles against the nearest wall and it’s all you can focus on. You slip into the thin sheets with ease, seemingly knocking out once your head hits the pillow.

“Good morning Y/N.”

“For god’s sake—” your body shoots up in a sitting position.

“Would you like to turn off the morning alarm—”

“Yes,” you murmur before she can finish her sentence. “Why is that on auto, anyways?” You blink. “What time is it?”

“It is 7:14 am on Earth, 11:30 am on Epsilon.”

You run a hand through your hair, painfully tugging at your scalp when it gets stuck in the tangles. You exit the warmth of the bed, finding a bathroom to your side with a shower and a sink.

Taking a shower felt unfamiliar for some reason. The sensation of water trickling down your body was foreign, making chills run up your spine. You scrub your skin and hair dry with a towel, meeting your reflection in the mirror when you stand straight.

Is this what you’ve always looked like?

Since waking up, you’ve remembered more and more about yourself and it doesn’t feel amnesia but more like distortion or sleep inertia that gets better a few minutes at a time.

Your name was definitely Y/N.

You were definitely twenty-two. You remember celebrating that number; a vanilla cake with obnoxious light sparklers, a dark room, soft singing, icing on your nose. But the faces around you seem blurry, indistinguishable from the over casted shadows.

You were a technician, and that you remember clearly but no specific events can come to your mind. You went to school, you had worked with robots in some workshop, your hands were constantly stained with rust and grease. It didn’t make much money, but you think you liked doing it.

Your head pounds, the exercise of memory straining the veins in your forehead. You give your hair one last ruffle with the towel before you slip through the bathroom door.

Ta-ting. “Would you like a change of clothes?” The voice asks.

“Do you have a name?” You inquire instead.

“I’m merely a program used to integrate and assist a passenger into the commodities of the starship. The closet of fresh clothes is to your left.”

“Be like that,” you say, smiling at yourself. You swing the closet doors open, the hangers carrying white tees and grey sweatpants, a red embroidered ‘483’ on the chest and thigh.

“The breakfast, lunch, and dinner hall is straight across the cabins,” she says again.

“Thanks, Eve,” you look up. “I’ll call you Eve.”

When you walk into the breakfast hall, the scenery strikes you as big— and eerily empty. The room stretches for what looks like miles but is more like yards. Like everything else, the interior is an eye-aching white, and the surface of the floor is littered with benches to eat at. You spot a small square window by a wall near the entrance, complimented with a rope barrier to signify the start of a queue.

You walk up to the window and a hologram appears in the space, this time conjuring not a person, but a menu.

You remember using hologram menus often. Maybe you liked to eat out a lot. You also remember that only luxury places could afford real waiters as you press for a bowl of cereal that materializes onto the surface in seconds.

The milk tastes bland so does the cereal, but at least the benches are comfortable and the silence lets you think. It doesn’t take long for your thoughts to wander, and you start thinking about just how empty this place is.

You had thought that everybody was supposed to wake up now. At least, that’s what you had been told before you boarded. But your memory was hazy and you were probably wrong. You leave the empty bowl at your table, suddenly entranced with exploring the ship a little more while you were still alone.

You walk back into the main lobby and check the last archway. It reads ‘Amenities’ and your stomach leaps in excitement. What did Eve say again? All you seemed to remember was something about a planetarium.

You grin as you walk in and you’re faced with three directions. ‘Bar’, ‘Swimming Pool’, and ‘Planetarium’. You stroll down the hallway that leads down the bar, peeking into the room. It’s softly lit with dark red padding as walls and you can see what looks like a counter top, most likely stocked with bottles of whiskey and wine.

Ta-ting. “Swimming pool,” Eve says on command as you walk in. The second room simulates a dark night sky, no lighting except for the ones against the pool wall. It creates an illumination of bright cerulean and you think it used to be your favourite color.

The planetarium was last and by far, most impressive; not merely just a dome, but an observatory too. Glass encases the room and lets you look into the black of space, scattered with stars that seemed so distant yet so close at the same time.

You slip your hands into the pockets of your pants, smiling as you walk around the circumference.

“I took a class in astrology,” you say to Eve, pausing. “I think.”

You lean closer into the glass, eyes squinting.

“I wonder if I can name a few of the stars,” you continue before you realize these are exo stars, nothing you would have known.

Ta-ting. “Would you like to learn about stars viewable from our current position?” Eve asks.

“Take it away,” you say with a wide grin, fixated on the sight.

“To your left is Star Lyra, one of the brightest in the Milky Way.”

A pause.

“Huh,” you say, eyebrows furrowing and gripping your arm.

“The star nearby Lyra is Star Vega, fifth brightest and only 25 light years from Earth.”

“25 light years?” You ask and your tone seems to drop. You chew on your lip as a nervous habit. “Where’s Epsilon?”

“Epsilon is the final destination of this starship. It is not viewable from our current position.”

“Why is that?” You question, your voice beginning to tremble a little. “Aren’t we a few months away?”

“We are 92 years away from Planet Epsilon.”

Nothing.

Static.

“Would you like to hear more about—”

“92 years?” Your heart stops beating. “Did you say—”

“Correct,” she says.

You laugh. “Whoever programmed you is clearly a beginner,” you chuckle at the floor. “Mind telling me where your control system is? You need some rewiring—”

“I am fully updated, made with no mistakes,” Eve interrupts.

“Well apparently not!” You yell, your face becoming heated. “We’re supposed to be 3 months away—”

“We are 92 years away from Planet Epsilon,” she affirms.

Your hand goes to rest against your forehead, furiously pounding against your fingers. “I need to sit.”

You stumble out of the room, out of the hallway. Okay, don’t panic. That Eve must be wrong. She’s a machine after all. Machines are stupid, machines are always wrong.

You run into the room full of pods, dormant, just as untouched as they had been when you woke up.

You check a pod; a man, asleep. Then another; asleep. Asleep, asleep, asleep.

You hold onto the wall for support, letting yourself inhale and exhale slowly. Why were you awake? Why did your pod open? Why weren’t they waking up by now? You remember, they were supposed to wake up—and you—and—why weren’t they waking up?

“Hello?” You yell out. Your throat is suddenly dry again and it hurts to say anything. “Is anybody here?”

Ta-ting. “Do you require assistance?” Eve’s voice sounds overhead. You whip your head around at the sound, your heart beating furiously in your chest.

“When—” you swallow saliva but you end up with nothing but dry air, “when is this?”

“It’s 8:01 am on—”

“No—” you fumble, “I meant—how many years till—the planet?”

“The starship has 92 years left until it reaches its destination of Planet Epsilon. Anything else?”

Your throat tightens. “No! You can’t be right…”

“Anything else?”

“Wait,” you feel a vein pump in your head and your body starts shaking, “I—no—wait—this can’t—”

You feel the weight crumple underneath you. Your feet start moving on their own, stumbling like a drunk man, and you try to reach for something—anything, so you can stop.

This can’t be happening. This can’t be happening.

92 years too early.

You would never reach the planet.

You would die here.

“How do I get back into my pod?” You shout.

Ta-ting, and that sound makes blood flow to your head rapidly. “The pod was designed and manufactured for—”

“Just tell me!” You interrupt, feeling your neck turn red with heat. “I’m Passenger 483! How do I get back into my pod?”

“The process of the capsulation of a passenger requires resources unavailable—”

“Please!” You beg, collapsing to your knees. Your body is vibrating violently, uncontrollably, your eyesight is blurry. “Please, please, please. Please just tell me!”

“You cannot get back into your pod,” she simply says and your whole world breaks down.

The tears don’t take long to start coming. They’re hot and furious and desperate and helpless all at once. You grab your ears, wanting to tear them from your skull, ripping the hairs from your head with clenched fists.

You were lost. You didn’t know what to do what could you even do who do you go to where do you go should you even do anything is there any hope for something—

This can’t be real. You can’t be the only one. You can’t be stranded alone like this.

You push yourself off the floor clumsily, running along the pods. Your breaths are frantic, hoarse, dry.

You fumble to the closest one, slamming your palms against the glass. “Hello?” You yell. “Please, anybody?” The body inside doesn’t flinch. The pod doesn’t react.

The next pod over; “Please! Please do something!” Nothing.

Next; “Please! I beg you, anything!” Nothing.

Your static for what seems like minutes before slumping onto the floor, your body slowly shutting down.

It was your fate to wake up. Written in the stars.

You run your hands through your hair, lightly tugging at the strands to stimulate feeling. Tears stay stationary in your eyes and you blink softly to let them roll down. You watch as they drop down between your legs and pool at the tiles underneath you.

You don’t know how much time has passed, you’re no longer aware of how time works. You sit there, hands nestled in your hair, knees pulled up to your body, just sitting—crying.

Eventually the tears stop flowing, and all it leaves is a hollow feeling in your chest. You lift your head and let it rest against the pod behind you.

Your eyes are shut because all you wanted to see at that moment was darkness. It was scary, it was empty, but it pulled you away from reality for a while, and that was all you could ask for.

You’re going to die here. Alone. All alone in outer space, the only thing with you is a programmed robot, but her control system will die before you do.

This is it.

Silence.

Then rumbling.

The noise makes you jump, chills vibrating the length of your spine. It’s coming from a pod opposite of where you sit.

The noise increases in volume and you flail away, crawling away with your palms against the cold tiles, your heart racing without control and your mouth is open; dry and stuck in a moment of time.

The rumbling subdues before the glass around the pod swings open.

Was—was somebody—

A flickering screen forms over the content of the pod.

“Good morning, Jimin.”

You hear a grunt, low and breathy, but audible.

“You’ve been asleep for a long time, it’s okay to be confused,” the hologram says.

Did—did you open this pod? No, of course you didn’t. You didn’t even touch it.

“Where—”

Your eyes snap up to the pod.

“Do you know where you are?”

No response. You can feel your heartbeat in your eardrums as you watch.

“Your name is—Park Jimin, you’re—twenty-four, your profession is a—engineer. You are currently on Starship—”

“Yeah, yeah, I know.”

A pause. “Would you like to hear more about the starship?”

“Just get me out.”

“Of course. Let’s get you up on your feet so you can properly rest, shall we?”

The pod tilts forward, and that’s the first time you see him. Blonde hair, squinted eyes. His mouth was twisted in a subtle scowl and his eyebrows furrowed.

The padding pushes forward and he clumsily steadies himself on his feet, almost collapsing like you had but he had a better balance. He presses his palms against his knees to stabilize himself and straightens up once he can, groaning along the way.

His eyes immediately land on you, and it’s like it doesn’t quite click for him. His frown grows, his mouth parts, but the realization doesn’t hit him yet. The sight of you on the floor; your face swamped with fear and your eyes fixated on him, confounds him further.

“Who are you?” He asks.

You breathe heavily, your chest rising and falling at an abnormal pace.

“Woah, are you okay?” He asks, taking a step forward. You move immediately, crawling further away. His eyes widen, putting up the palm of his hand. “I’m not gonna hurt you—”

You can no longer talk, heaving instead. You feel sick, your stomach churning and something chunky crawls up your throat.

“Hey, hey,” he rushes forward when you lean over the floor, saliva dripping down your chin, “are you sick? Do you need some kind of medic?”

You don’t find the energy or the reflex to scurry away this time, letting him place a careful hand on your shoulder. He squats down to look at you.

“I’m so sorry,” you whisper in the back of your throat.

“What?” His face twists in confusion and you swallow down what closes up your throat.

“I’m so—sorry,” you repeat through your tears.

“Why are you crying?” He asks before the concern is replaced with dread at your answer. “What’s happening here?”

“You—we,” you can’t finish the sentence but you push through for him. “Our pods—”

You find that you don’t need to finish the sentence by the way his face falls. You wish it didn’t have to.

He lifts his hand from the residence of your shoulder, falling backward so he sits flat in your position, legs spread and arms barely holding him up straight.

“I—” He tries to speak then stops. “How much…” His voice drains out.

“92 years.”

A deafening silence rings throughout the room, a white noise that makes you want to cradle your ears in your hands. He didn’t deserve this, neither did you. Nobody deserved this.

Then he’s jumping up from his position, on his knees and talking faster than you can process his words. “There must be something we can do! I’m an engineer, I can fix the ship, or the pods!” He’s panicking, scared and trembling. “Is there a maintenance room somewhere?

“I—” you’re flustered for words. “I don’t know—”

“Where’s the maintenance room?” He asks above.

“You do not have access to the maintenance room as a passenger,” Eve answers.

“Fuck,” he hisses. “I’ll find it myself.” He’s fully up on his feet. “Are you coming?”

You don’t answer because you can’t.

“Why not?” He demands.

“There’s nothing we can do,” you say.

“What are you talking about?” His face buckling into one of disbelief. “How long have you been here?”

“A day,” you mumble.

“Have you tried anything yet?”

Your mouth is dry. “No—”

“So how can you be so sure?” His voice is stung with venom, the frustration now targeted at you.

“She told me you can’t get back into a pod after it’s been—”

“Who?” He asks a little too loudly, stepping forward.

“The program,” you answer, cowering under his large figure over you.

He steps back. “And you trust a machine? How can you give up so easily?”

“Because we can’t do anything! The pods can’t be refunctioned, we can’t get into the maintenance room—”

“Fine,” he interrupts, “stay here if you want.”

He runs off, and in your mind he’s an idiot with too much optimism for his own good but there lies a sliver of doubt in your words because maybe there is a way.

But then you remember to ground yourself back to reality once you realize the hope building in your chest is just hope to shield yourself from the truth and nothing else.

You feel sick again and all of a sudden you crave nothing but to lie down somewhere but you can’t find the strength in you to stand. Your legs were too shaky and your heart was too heavy.

You stay, trying to die down the pounding of your head and the nausea in the back of your throat with your legs pulled up to your chest and your face in your knees. You’re not sure of how much time had passed until you stand up to stumble into your cabin and sleep off the thoughts brewing in your head. You’re not sure of anything anymore.

You remembered the next day, as you pick the same bowl of cereal for breakfast from the menu, that you could be different levels of a ‘passenger’ and you happened to be the lowest one; ‘Bronze’ level. It wasn’t a great thing to remember, but it by par explained the bland taste of your milk.

Your mind also wandered to yesterday, as much as it didn’t want to.

Where was that guy? Was he still looking for that maintenance room?

Maybe he did fix the pods and he’s restfully sleeping on his leather padding while you eat a stale bowl of cereal.

But you were more realistic than that.

Instead, you preoccupy yourself with trying to remember details of your life; your parent’s features, maybe if you had a sibling or two, where you went to school, your friends, your first kiss.

It dawned on you that perhaps that guy has the same memory disfiguration as you. Maybe it’s a side effect of a malfunctioning pod. But maybe not, because he seems to understand his situation, the innards of the ship. Maybe it was just you.

Then you think if another passenger will awake today and that’s how this wreck of a ship worked; that there aren’t any malfunctions but instead that this ship was destined to wake every member up each day as part of some sick, cruel joke. In that case, you felt honored to be picked first.

The doors slide open and it startles you, making you almost drop your spoon. The man walks in, a sense of defeat in the soles of his shoes. His hair is messy, strands standing up as if he had been running his fingers through the whole day. His eyes are wide yet so tired at the same time, aching to close but forcing them to remain open.

“Hey.” He says.

You swallow your food, on the edge of your seat. “Hi.”

He strides towards your table and you inch backward, gripping your plastic knife you brought with you for safety in your left hand. Instead of approaching you, he sits on the opposite seat, resting his elbows on the surface and rubbing his fingers around his disgruntled face. The discoloration under his eyes told you he probably didn’t catch any sleep.

You don’t say anything because you know what that means.

“You hungry?” You ask, slouching and placing your knife back down. He didn’t frighten you, not really. Quite the opposite; he elicited a feeling of sympathy when you stopped viewing him as a danger but another victim.

He doesn’t look up, just nods.

“I’ll get some food for you,” you offer, standing up.

“It’s fine,” he stops you. “I’ll get it,” his voice monotone with an underlying tone of exhaustion. He stands up before you can sit back down, trudging towards the window and you’re left to stare into the distance with a building dread of the conversation to ensue.

He returns, and the plate he holds makes you drop your jaw.

“Woah,” you say under your breath.

His dish carries an English breakfast, complete with slices of burgundy bacon, a soup bowl brimming to the top with baked beans, small potatoes, and two sunny-side up eggs.

You look down at your plate in inhibition before your eyes rise to ogle at his plate.

“Want a piece, Bronze?” He asks, an eyebrow raised, almost amused at the saliva accumulating on your tongue.

Your mouth closes. “I have a name.” He looks up. “Y/N.”

“And I’m Jimin, thanks for asking,” he says, slicing through a potato with his fork and picking it up into his mouth.

Your eyebrows twitch at his words, and a little at how good his food looked. “I suppose you’re Gold level—or something.”

“And I suppose you’re Bronze,” he says, a mouthful full of potato, “judging by your—cereal.”

You frown. “I don’t appreciate your classism.”

He smiles, flicking a piece of bacon to the side of his plate with his fork before looking back up at you. “Want a piece—Y/N?”

You resist a smile, growing abnormally and quickly relaxed in the presence of a complete stranger. “I’d rather starve than take something from you Gold-level-scum.”

Jimin stifles a laugh. “Now who’s being classist?” You look down at your bowl, unable to hide the way the edges of your mouth tilt up. “Really, you can have a piece.”

You look at him, then down at his plate, then back up before leaning over with your fork in hand to stab the bacon between the prongs and bring it into your mouth. It tastes like heaven, smoked and oily.

“You’re awfully nice,” you say, chewing fervently.

“And you’re awfully not-freaked-out,” Jimin replies.

You swallow, your face stilling. “Of course I am.”

Jimin looks up at you from lidded eyes.

“I am,” you say. “I really, really am.”

“You’re good at hiding it then,” Jimin sits forward, running his fingers through his hair and closing his eyes. “I can’t wrap my head around this. I’m so—fucking terrified.”

Your eyes fall down at your bowl, biting the inside of your cheek. “I get it,” you say and he pauses the torment of his hair with his hands, “you don’t want it to be true. Neither do I.”

“It’s not true,” Jimin lifts his eyes, frowning. “We can fix the pods.”

You breathe in through your nose, not responding so you can switch the subject. “Did anybody else wake up?”

“Not that I know of,” Jimin moves on too.

“Would you want more people to wake up?” You ask, smiling a little at the thought. “We can create a little democracy in here, ‘Lord of the Flies’ style but sci-fi. Divide the group into two sides, maybe start a war, kill each other off by the second year. I reckon I should be leader of at least one side, since I was the first to wake up. You know I was thinking earlier—”

You stop yourself as you fix your eyes back onto Jimin, his face is free from amusement. He stares down at his plate, his lips trembling and his eyes casted under a shadow from his furrowed eyebrows and his hair falling forward.

“Jimin?” You lean down further to see him more clearly. It’s the first time you address him by his name, and he looks startled when he lifts his head.

“Yeah, sorry,” he says, slightly out-of-breathe. “I think that’d be great.”

You frown. “I was talking about killing each other off.” He blinks his eyes nervously. “Are you okay?”

“Well,” he fumbles with his fingers. “I actually—”

“It’s fine,” you say, and uncharacteristically reach out to hold his wrist. “You don’t have to tell me if you don’t want to. You did just meet me yesterday, and not in the most ideal conditions.” His eyes had widened at your action, his hand practically frozen in time under your touch.

“No it’s fine. I—” he breathes heavily.

You tighten your grasp around his wrist a little.

“I have a fiancé.”

“Oh,” you say in shock. Your eyes dart to your hand around his wrist and you immediately retract it like it had burnt you. “Oh,” you say again when you realize what he meant. “Is she—”

“On this ship?” He finishes for you. “That’s what I was trying to find out. We got—split up before boarding.”

You don’t say anything, still gripping your spoon on your other hand and keeping it stationary in its position so it doesn’t make a sound against the bowl.

“I tried asking for a database but that stupid program wouldn’t let me access it,” Jimin continues, playing with his food idly. “I tried looking for her pod but—there’s too many.”

You chew your lip, your heart falling. “I’m so sorry.”

Jimin stays silent.

“That must—be—” You sigh.

Jimin shakes his head. “I didn’t mean to—”

“It’s okay,” you interrupt.

A pause, and you take the time to pick up the last bit of cereal into your mouth, swallowing without sound.

“For what it’s worth, I can’t remember most of my life.”

He blinks up in concern. “What?”

“Well, not really. It comes to me bit by bit,” you explain, “but I can’t remember a lot.”

A pause. “What do you remember?” He asks, leaning in further.

You shrug, suddenly uncomfortable with the subject. “My name, my job, the place I worked at, my age. That’s about it.”

Jimin shifts his mouth to the side. “Not even your parents?”

“No,” you say.

“A lover?”

You raise an eyebrow. “Assuming I have a lover, no.”

He holds a reserved smile. “So I take it you’re a workaholic, then?”

“Maybe,” you smile, “those are my clearest memories.”

“So what do you do?”

“I’m a technician,” you answer, preparing yourself for his reaction.

“A technician?” He repeats. “That seems—fun.”

You scoff. “Just cause you’re on some engineer high horse doesn’t mean you can belittle me. I work with robots.”

“And I build the robots,” Jimin says, cracking his knuckles.

“Good for you, Harvard,” you roll your eyes. “But who would be more qualified to fix this ship? A builder or a fixer?”

“In the case I get into that maintenance room, me.”

Your face drops. “You found it?”

He sighs, abandoning eating his food and resorting to disfiguring it, splitting the yolk of the egg and letting it run across the plate.

“Yes,” he continues. “It’s a small doorway along the hallway, but you need a code.”

Your eyebrows raise.

“I couldn’t get in.” Your eyes fall down at the table. “There’s a limit to how many times you can put in a code before it locks you for 24 hours.”

“And?” You ask.

“I’m gonna try again today,” Jimin answers. “I’ll create an algorithm so I won’t miss a single combination.”

“And what are you gonna do when you find this code?” You ask, feeling your chest swell up and swirling your spoon around the milk.

He frowns at you. “I’ll figure it out. I’m an engineer, I know how to work myself around these situations.”

Your eyes harden at his words. He was being unrealistic, and top of that, stupid. “I’m sure.”

He lets his fork hit the side of his plate, eliciting a cold ‘cling’ across the empty room. “I don’t understand you.”

Your face twists. “You’ve only known me for 20 minutes.”

“I think you’re nice and then you go acting like this. I mean, this is our lives at stake. Do you just not care?”

His words set a flame in your insides. “It’s not that I don’t care, it’s that I’m being realistic—”

He chuckles.

“I’m serious,” you grit your teeth. “There’s nothing we can do, might as well just accept the truth early on—”

“And be stuck here forever?” He exclaims.

“Better than being stuck here alone forever,” you retort with spite.

“Maybe it is better to be here alone,” he spits and it infuriates you. He never had to live through that fear of absolute isolation, and the fact that he’s suggesting it could possibly be better—

“You have no idea what you’re talking about,” you mumble. “Listen, we’re not getting back to sleep. We’re gonna live and die on this ship, and you need to face that fact—”

“I actually would have a life on that planet—” He stops, his words catching up to him. “Wait, I’m sorry. That was out of line—”

You stand up with limber, almost knocking over your bowl in the process. “Thanks for the bacon, it was lovely to make acquaintances with you. I hope you enjoy spending the next 90 years—stuck on this fucking ship—with a lowlife like me—forever.”

Your legs climb over the bench and you stomp away from the room.

You know what? You wish he does find a way to fix his pod so he can go right back to sleep. Somebody this self-centric was better off on a new planet with people other than you to belittle and build his already-massive ego. You had no time or energy for somebody like him, and you weren’t about to start trying.

A day goes by before you see him again. You pass by him on your way to the food hall for lunch. The sight of him creates a curdle in your stomach. He looks at you expectantly, and it fuels you to ignore him even more, so you stick your nose up as you walk by, averting your eyes and failing to exchange a greeting.

You’re glad you can eat alone this time because in this overwhelmingly large ship at the edge of the universe and so far away from human life, you really needed some space.

You expect this game to go on for at least a few more months until you start craving human interaction again, and only then will you forgive him for the sake of your sanity. Even so, you’ll gladly keep your distance from him. Nobody said you had to be friends, so you don’t have to be.

What you don’t expect is the knock on your cabin door that same day.

It slides open to reveal Jimin, standing in his white tee and grey sweatpants.

“You found the code?” You ask, leaning against the wall and crossing your arms.

He huffs. “No, I wanted to show you something.”

You frown, standing straight. “That doesn’t sound dangerous.”

“I’m not going to murder you, Y/N.”

Hearing your name come out of his mouth sounded so strange, and for some reason, you feel enticed to believe him. “If you say so.”

Jimin quirks a smile. “Quick! We’ll miss it.”

He turns his heel, jogging a little and you follow him with a hesitant speed. He leads you to the planetarium and you stop at the doorway, scoffing. “Yeah, I already know about this place.”

He’s still jogging, lights flickering on at his movements and he stops in front of the glass, looking behind his shoulder at you. “Quick! Come closer.”

You frown but walk toward him nonetheless. He’s staring at the view so you do the same, trying to find the subject of his excitement. “What are we looking for?”

“Shush,” he says, his eyes not leaving the glass.

You roll your eyes and turn back. Moments pass and still nothing happens. “I don’t have time for th—”

Your words are cut off just as a ball of flames comes into view and you involuntarily gasp. It’s not too close and not too far, bright and blue with trailing tail behind, making its steady way across the length of the observation and you can’t take your eyes off the alluring sight.

“It’s a comet,” Jimin says, leaning over to you, hands behind his back.

“Yeah, I could figure,” you reply, breaking away from the sight for a second to eye him. “Just slung around the sun. I didn’t know we could encounter one this far away.”

“We’re not far away enough, then,” Jimin says with melancholy. “It’s beautiful though.”

You sneak him a glance and his expression is soft, relaxed. The light from the comet reaches his eyes, creating an illusion of a bright star in his dark orbs.

You turn back to the glass, nodding in agreement. The comet is halfway across now.

“Stacy, how long until it completes another revolution towards the sun?” Jimin asks.

Ta-ting. “Approximately 7 light years,” the voice above answers.

“Thank you,” Jimin says.

A pause. “Stacy?” You ask with a display of disgust.

“That’s what I call her,” Jimin turns to you, an oblivious expression.

“Her name is Eve, not Stacy,” you say and he chuckles.

“Well, she responds to both.”

“Eve,” you say, looking at the ceiling, “which name do you prefer? Eve or Stacy?”

Ta-ting. “I am merely a program,” she answers and you groan, “I have no preferred name.”

“No human builds a machine and doesn’t name it,” Jimin murmurs, his eyes still trained on the comet that will soon disappear from view.

“Another mystery to be solved once you find that code?” You raise your eyebrows.

He doesn’t say anything. “While we’re back on that subject,” he places his hands in the pockets of his sweatpants and fully turns towards you, “let’s make amends. We’re gonna spend a long time together, and I think we should reserve biting each other’s heads off until Year 5.”

“I have my bets on Year 3,” you say and he grins.

“Always the pessimistic.”

“Again,” you sigh teasingly, “you’ve only known me for 20 minutes.”

“I would say it’s 30 minutes now,” Jimin teases back. He turns back, the comet nowhere in sight. “Oh, shit. We didn’t see it leaving.”

“That’s okay,” you say, your eyes on him as he’s not looking. “Thanks for not letting me miss it.”

Jimin whips his head back to you. “It’s just courtesy of a fellow passenger,” he says and you start laughing, “on Starship Sortis heading towards Planet Epsilon. Would you like to hear more about Starship Sortis?” You laugh harder. “Here on this 100% fool-proof ship, we provide a variety of commodities for our passengers.”

When your laughter dies down, it leaves behind a smile of comfort, a warm feeling in your belly.

“But really,” Jimin says, his voice more serious, “I’m sorry.”

You stop your smile from growing. “I’m a big girl. I can handle bullies.”

It’s a joke but Jimin’s eyes fall to the floor. “Am I really a bully?”

“No,” you say, your voice softening. “Amend is made.”

His smile returns. “Great to hear, you hungry?”

“Really craving those stale sausages and lumpy potatoes,” you say as you both beginning walking to the exit.

“Unfortunately for you,” he says, bumping your shoulder a little, “I’ve bestowed upon you the permission to order on my Gold-Level behalf.”

“Gee, thanks,” you say with wit but you’re grateful, “what did I do to deserve such kindness and mercy on my Bronze-Level soul?”

He laughs. “Let’s hurry before the queue gets too long.”

You’re not sure how long it is since you woke up. Maybe two weeks? Time moved quickly as you occupy most of your meal times with Jimin and meaningless, light conversations.

However, you sit in the dinner hall alone today, chewing on a piece of sausage because Jimin’s Gold-Level privilege wasn’t there to save your taste buds this time. He was missing dinner to spend a little more time in the pod room, and he had done so a few times prior.

You don’t blame him; of course you don’t. After all, he does have somebody to look for. A fiancé. A lover he hadn’t even had the chance to make his yet.

You hadn’t asked Jimin what he would do if he did find her. You wondered if he’d wake her up, but you had too much faith in him to do that.

Sometimes you wonder if he looks at you and wishes you were her.

What would be so bad about spending the rest of your life on this ship if it was with your lover? Problem is, you’re not his lover, and that must be why he’s so adamant about finding a way back into those pods.

Of course you don’t blame him. But it leaves a bitter taste in your mouth in the inhibition of wanting to be replaced. Frankly, you want to apologize for you being the one to wake up instead of her almost every time you see him because it’s awful being condemned to live out your life here, and even more so when it’s with a complete stranger rather than somebody you care for. You didn’t have anybody like that, but he did.

Right before you leave, you order a green apple and take it with you towards the pod room.

Jimin isn’t too far from the entrance. He sits, kneeled down next to his pod, inspecting what seems like the control panel on the side.

You sneak up behind him and lean down. “Hey.”

“Oh God,” his head snaps to you, flinching and clutching his heart. “You scared me.”

“I thought the whole point of being the only two people on this ship is to know who says hi to you,” you joke, placing the apple down by him and leaning forward to look at what he’s doing. “That the control panel?”

“Yep,” he affirms. There’s a box of tools by his side and your eyes widen. “Doesn’t take much to open them up.”

“And you found tools?” You ask, taking a proper seat on the floor.

“There’s a spare tool box in every cabin,” Jimin answers, cracking his neck. “Guess whoever designed this ship knew what a fuck up it is and left it to the passenger to fix it themselves,” he pauses to look at you. “Good for us though.”

“I don’t have a spare tool box in mine,” you whine. “Is this a Gold-Level thing?”

“Well, you are a—” Jimin smiles, “dare I say, a commoner.”

You snort. “This isn’t the Middle Ages.”

He laughs in return. “You should really see my cabin. It’s super luxurious.”

“My bathroom is the size of one of those benches in the dinner hall,” you say and he chuckles, “it wouldn’t take much to impress me.”

“Oh, don’t say that. Keep your standards high.”

“What’s the progress on this panel?” You say, bending down to look closer.

“Nothing yet,” he answers and you perk an eyebrow. “Don’t give me that look. I gotta be really delicate with these. We only have two empty pods, and I don’t want to mess everything up by pressing the ‘Close Forever’ button.”

You huff. “There’s a button on there like that?”

“Who knows?”

“Maybe I do,” you say. “It’s my profession working with control panels, in case you’ve forgotten.”

“I haven’t,” Jimin replies and you roll your eyes, as if you were the one name-dropping your profession every time the opportunity arises. He turns away from you, his eyes trained on the panel with scrutinizing concentration.

“Why don’t you take a break?” You suggest as you suspect he’s wasting his time.

“Doing what?” He turns around, his expression challenging you in amusement.

You move to stand up with haste, looking down at him to do the same. “Let’s test that self-proclaimed high IQ,” you say with a complacent expression, walking along the line of pods and stopping by one nearby.

He smiles, following after you. “I would show you my certified degree but—”

You chuckle. “Have you been looking at the pods’ name tags?” You ask, bouncing in your step.

He shakes his head, his smile growing once he realizes the game. “Just the faces.”

“Great,” you say. “How old is this woman?”

“Oh, come on,” he groans, “no multiple choices?”

“As I recall, you’re an engineer, right?” He laughs. “You don’t need multiple choice.”

Jimin leans closer to the pod and you cover the name tag on the glass with your hand so he can’t cheat. The woman inside is youthful, short hair and fair skin.

“Twenty—” he pauses, “six?”

You lift your hand to read the name tag. “Final answer?”

“Twenty-five!”

“She’s thirty-one,” you say. “Not so Harvard now, are you?”

“Thirty-one?” He repeats. “No way. Who’s her dermatologist?”

You laugh, nudging his shoulder. “Thirty isn’t even old, shut the hell up.”

“Says the person further from thirty than I am,” he jokes. “Your turn.”

He runs to the next pod, taking a second to read the name tag before covering it and standing straight. “What’s this gentleman’s name?”

“You gotta give me multiple choice on that,” you say, your body deflating before looking into the pod.

“Eric, Michael, Burton.”

“It has to be Burton,” you say with a laced amusement, looking back up. “You couldn’t have thought of that on the spot.”

“Eh,” he imitates a buzzer, “Michael.”

“I apologize for undermining your imagination, then” you giggle. “Okay, really, you have to get at least one right.” You skip to another pod. “Profession?”

Jimin raises an eyebrow, looking inside to see a woman with bobbed hair and dark skin.

“Script writer, wine connoisseur, or medic?”

He taps his chin. “Let me think. Medic seems compelling. She looks like she can handle the stress.”

“Weird observation,” you comment, “you have five seconds.”

“I’ll go with wine connoisseur.”

“Ugh,” you grunt. “1 point.”

“Woo!” He throws his arms into the air in celebration. “Told you I’m smart!”

“Only because I gave you multiple choice,” you say, rolling your eyes.

“You know,” he leans his hand on the glass, “I know quite a bit about wine myself.”

“Is that so?” You lift an eyebrow.

“Yeah, really. I noticed there was a bar around here that I haven’t tried out yet,” Jimin says, something suggestive in his expression. “Wanna go get drunk?”

You smile, your stomach dropping at his words and you don’t know why. You want to say yes but something stops you, making you swallow those words of agreement. The thought of being so close to him, red and flustered in the face and unable to think straight, makes your conscience feel heavy with guilt. “Maybe another time.”

His shoulders drop, his face falling ever so slightly.

“You should get some food, and then some sleep,” you say. “Or don’t. I brought you an apple,” you say, tilting your head towards where you had left it.

Jimin holds a stifled chuckle. “Awfully nice of you.”

You return the smile, your chest glowing. “Night.”

“Night.”

Turning your heel, you head back towards your cabin and there’s a lightness in your stomach that fails to fade, continuing to dwindle in your insides even when you’re in bed and staring up at the ceiling. You don’t indulge in the feeling though, you don’t want it to. You just pretend it isn’t there so you can fall asleep.

You don’t see Jimin all of next day. He didn’t have breakfast, nor lunch. He wasn’t in the pod room either, at least from how much of it you had searched, and hour by hour, you grow more and more uneasy. It’s irrational to feel the worry, but it’s felt nonetheless.

But he wasn’t yours to worry about. Of course not. You were you and Jimin was Jimin. You were both independent adults with at simplest a comradery, at best a friendship. Nothing else. He could do as he pleases and it wasn’t up to you to worry about him.

You leave your cabin after what seems like hours of lying in bed. Time moved so slow when you were alone, and you can’t even imagine keeping your sanity if Jimin had never woken up.

You haven’t remembered anything new, with a small expectation of your homestead body. You think you liked being in bed a lot in particular, and at some point, you seemed to conjure an image of your bed in your head but it faded away before you could fully grasp it.

The corridors are completely empty, echoing the sound your footsteps hitting the tiles across the hall. You slip your hands into your sweatpants, walking leisurely into the main lobby and towards the dinner hall.

Then Jimin is running out from the amenities hall and your heart jumps at the sudden sight. His hair bounced with him, his eyes wide, his lips stretching from side to side.

“There you are,” he says, slowing down his jogging once he’s close enough.

“I could say the same,” you reply, tugging at your sweatpants’ material inside the pocket. “What have you been doing all day?”

“Have you eaten dinner yet?” He asks, dodging your question and you narrow your eyes at him with suspicion.

“I was about to—”

“You hungry?”

You pause. “Yeah, I guess—”

“Come on, then” Jimin says, wrapping a hand around your wrist and pulling it out from your pockets. Then he’s running, tailing you behind, through the amenities hall and towards the bar.

You slow down your feet, creating a resistance. “Uh, Jimin—”

“It’s okay, trust me,” Jimin says, turning back to you. His eyes are brimming with excitement, and you could see a glimpse of those lips over his shoulder. He tugs at your arm again and you pick up the pace again.

The room is just as how you remembered it; red and romantic with soft lighting. The shelf behind the bar is decorated with so many unopened bottles of white and mustard and amber.

“Doesn’t alcohol ruin an appetite?” You ask as he releases the hold on your wrist.

Jimin doesn’t answer you as he walks towards the end of the room and that’s when you see it; a door. Silver plated, tall and arched.

“You ready to get your mind blown?” He asks, spinning around and grabbing the handle. Your eyebrows furrow in the anticipation, now only standing a few feet away.

“Is it gonna jump out at me?”

Jimin laughs. “3, 2, 1.”

He swings the door open, revealing a room tucked under a beige burlap, detailed with gold embroidery, hiding the contents of what lies beyond.

“Go in,” Jimin beckons. You do so with slow steps, ducking under the burlap as you walk through.

You turn back with a look of joy as Jimin follows you in. “What is this place?”

“It’s reserved for Gold-Levels,” Jimin quirks an eyebrow. “Better than that dinner hall, huh?”

It’s a restaurant, and it was definitely better than the dinner hall, especially because the first thing your eyes land on is the window out into outerspace, the view slightly obstructed with the dark wood tables and the velvet cushioned seats. The ceiling above carved details on its surface and the lights were soft and warm. A place seemingly so wide and open, yet so private at the same time.

“Did you remember to get a reservation?” You ask Jimin, making him laugh unexpectedly.

“All booked, sadly,” Jimin shakes his head in faux disappointment and you giggle at his antics.

“But really,” you say, walking closer towards the window, “how did you find this place?”

“Our friend, Stacy,” he says just to make you squirm. “It was completely closed off though.”

You frown, looking back at him. “What do you mean?”

“The door was locked,” Jimin says. “I think it requires staff access to start the place up, and we’re a little empty on that.”

You nod in understanding. “So what did you do?”

“Hacked the door,” he says with a smile.

“Ooh,” you coo, “so smart.”

“Yes, yes, thank you,” Jimin grins, walking up to a table and pulling out a chair.

You sit, exchanging a smile between the two of you and smoothing over your shirt as you wait for him to sit down opposite you.

A menu materializes in the middle of the table, blocking Jimin from your view. You press for the beef tenderloin and a glass of cold water, your saliva accumulating in your mouth at the picture previews. Jimin finishes ordering too and the menu disintegrates, leaving your eyes on him and his on yours.

Then, within seconds, the kitchen doors burst open to reveal a little robot, carrying a single tray with two plates.

You laugh in surprise and Jimin shortly joins in, your eyes fixated on the machine as it quickly rolls towards your table. It’s short and polished white with short mechanical arms, making you giggle harder.

“Oh my god,” you’re still laughing. “I haven’t seen a robot in so long. And it’s so cute, too.”

“Thank you, Buddy,” Jimin says, leaning further into the robot as it places his plate in front of him.

“Buddy?” You ask, your face feeling warm.

“Didn’t take long to reboot his system and get him going,” Jimin responds, smiling too. “Plus, I think he likes that name.”

Buddy places your plate down on the table before whizzing back through where it came from; your eyes still trained on it, squinting with glee.

“Ready to eat?” Jimin asks.

You nod with eagerness, picking up a fork and knife in hand to cut a small piece. The steak is just the right temperature and tenderness and you’re not sure if you’ve ever had something so lavish. The whole experience seemed foreign, strange but so exciting.

He seems to read your mind. “You ever been to a restaurant this fancy?”

“Never,” you say. “I think I’ve only ever been to diners.”

“You ever been served by a robot?”

You shake your head. “Definitely not.”

“I’m glad,” Jimin says. “Nothing like a first-time restaurant with a view into outerspace, huh?”

You chuckle, turning your head to the window. “It’s beautiful,” you comment, staring at the black littered with bright shining stars. It was so vast and empty, and it really feels like you two are the last people alive.

You turn back to Jimin and he’s already looking at you, resting his chin on his folded knuckles. Your heart skips a beat and he diverts his gaze quickly.

“How’s the food?” He asks.

“It’s good,” you say, nodding and the air seems awkward. “Can’t believe I’ve been eating stale cereal when I could have been having tenderloins.”

He chuckles.

“Thank you,” you say, “really, engineer jokes aside. This is so cool.”

“It’s no problem,” he says and he still hasn’t started eating. “Imagine how cool this place would be if it was full of people. It’d be just like life back on Earth.”

“I kinda like it like this,” you say, a held back smile peeking through your lips. “People were annoying anyways.”

Jimin lets out a surprised chuckle. “Can’t argue with that.”

You both eat, finishing your plates after your normal conversations. But something was a little different, a little more reserved but a little fuller of smiles too.

“You getting the check?” Jimin asks.

You scoff. “Left my wallet back on the other planet, sorry.”

“Typical,” he shakes his head before standing from his seat.

Just as you stand, music from above starts playing. It’s low pitched and grand with a lively tempo, almost like a waltz. You pause in shock, turning towards Jimin just as confused as you are.

Then, he bursts out into a laugh. “Guess we have to dance now.”

Your heart skips, smiling from ear to ear. “I guess we do.”

He looks down at the floor, sheepishly grinning from the embarrassment before walking over to you, offering out his hand for you to take.

You roll your eyes, unable to stop your smile as you take it. Your fingers feel like fire against his. He leads you to the middle of the room, a space unoccupied by tables and just an overhead light shining down below.

“You know how to dance?” He asks.

“No,” you shake your head.

“Follow my steps then,” he says, placing his other hand on your back and you wonder why you couldn’t be doing any other dance in the world right now that didn’t involve him being so close.

You look down, watching his feet. He steps forward, then back, then lifts his arm above your head. You spin hesitantly, meeting his squinting eyes as you turn back.

“You’re not half bad,” Jimin comments.

“I’m a quick learner.”

“Is that so?” He quirks an eyebrow. “Let’s pick up the pace.”

Forward, back, spin, then he adds a move from side to side, then forward, back, spin again.

“Wow,” his face is lit up, “you’re actually really good.”

You wince in pain. “You stepped on my foot.”

“Did I?” Jimin’s eyebrows furrow. “Oh, no! I’m sorry!”

“I’ll remember that,” you let out in a hoarse whisper, melodramatically reaching down and smoothing over your toes.

He laughs. “We’ll take it slow, then.”

Almost as a response, the music above slows down it’s tempo.

“Her voice recognition is a little alarming, isn’t it?” You tell him.

He grins, ignoring your comment as he reconnects himself to you, a hand intertwined with yours and the other against your back. He rocks leisurely, swinging to the music. You follow him, a hand on his shoulder and the desire to lean in closer.

“So,” you say, breaking the silence, “you’re an engineer, and a waltz dancer?”

Jimin chuckles. “I took one waltz class.”

“Quite the Jack of All Trades, aren’t you?” You smile.

“I try my best,” he replies.

The silence is comforted, the rocking is slow and relaxed.

You ignore the voices in your head, leaning into him so you can rest against his shoulder, swaying with him. It almost lulls you to sleep, and you wouldn’t mind falling asleep like this.

You feel his fingers play with the material of your shirt, making hair on your arms stand up. You pull away quickly before anything could escalate, but it’s a bad idea.

You can see the lightness in his brown eyes, the slight honey color around his iris, casted over his dark eyelashes. His mouth twitches as you stare at him, the overhead light above creating a sheen glossed over his pink lips. You feel his fingers twitch behind your back and you push yourself away, your eyes taking safety in the floor rather than him.

The music had stopped a while ago.

“That was fun,” you say awkwardly, your stomach curdling.

“It was,” he says slowly and when you look up, his eyebrows are creased. “Are you—tired yet?”

You shake your head, biting your lip.

“Okay,” he smiles a little. “Because I’m really craving some alcohol in my system.”

“Oh,” you say, your tone falling.

“Do you want to drink?” He asks, his eyebrows furrowed in concern.

“I don’t know,” you say. “I don’t know if I’ve ever drank before.”

“We don’t have to get drunk,” he continues. “You don’t even have to drink at all. We can just sit and talk.”

That wasn’t the problem, but he didn’t have to know that.

You don’t want to say too much, do too much, anything to step over the imaginary line you had drawn between you and him, especially not if you’re intoxicated on top of it all.

“Okay,” you agree nonetheless, only because he wants it so much. “I’ll take a few sips,” compensating.

He smiles, beginning to make his way past the tables and through the door, taking a seat on one of the stools in the bar. “Let’s go simple. Red or white?”

You frown, a few feet away from him. “Red?” A guess.

“Good choice,” he says, clicking for two glasses on the menu in front of him. It was the right guess.

“No Buddy?” You ask, climbing on the stool next to him.

“He’s too short to reach over this bar,” Jimin says as he slides a newly appeared glass of red wine over to you.

“How cute,” you gush. “I’m imagining it now.”

“Okay, okay,” Jimin says, “he’s not all that.”

You laugh.

“Try a little,” Jimin beckons and you follow. You don’t flinch as it hits your mouth, more like you lap it up with a sense of familiarity.

“I’ve definitely had this before.”

“See?” Jimin says, taking a sip too. “Wasn’t so bad.”

You ignore him, your insides fluttering. “How old does the wine smell like?” You ask to distract yourself.

He laughs. “God, I don’t know.”

“You said you were a wine connoisseur,” you say, scoffing. “Faker.”

“It smells,” he pauses, taking an exaggerated sniff from the cup, “80 years old.”

“You just made that up.”

“How can you fact check that?”

“Eve, how old is this wine we’re drinking?” You ask, looking to the ceiling.

Ta-ting. “It’s around 130 years.”

You turn back to Jimin, an eyebrow perked.

“80 years, give or take 50,” he says shrugging, drinking more as you chuckle. “Does the wine make you remember something?”

“Not really,” you take another sip to make sure. “It just tastes familiar.”

He nods, looking down at the table’s surface. He prepares to say something, then pauses as if to contemplate it, then continuing. “What happened with your pod that it didn’t fully recover your memory?”

“…I don’t know,” you say slowly, frowning. Another pause. “It’s not just my memory. When I woke, my whole body was stiff.”

“That happened to me too,” Jimin affirms.

“No, but it was really severe for me,” you say, your voice growing deeper. “It hurt to move the ligaments in my fingers, and my whole body was just clicking.”

“Oh, that is strange,” he agrees. “The gas inside the pods are supposed to relax your muscles to prevent that from happening.”

You take in a deep breath. “Guess my pod wasn’t checked.”

“Do you—” he pauses, “wish you—could remember?”

You sigh. “I don’t know. I suppose it’s a bittersweet thing.”

“You forget all the bad, but also all the good?” He asks.

“Yeah,” your voice trails off.

“Don’t worry,” Jimin says, forming a timid smile, “you’ll remember eventually. I know you will.”

You nod and take another sip of your wine, realizing just how much you like Jimin. He’s nice, intelligent, he gets your humor, he gets you.

92 years don’t seem so far away when he’s here.

“How do you feel remembering?” You ask.

Jimin twists his mouth. “Bittersweet.”

You take in a quick inhale, tapping your nails against your glass. “If you don’t mind,” you say, resting your elbow on the table surface, “can you tell me about what you remember?”

“I don’t mind,” Jimin nods, his eyes leaving you and staring off into nothing. “I had a good childhood. I was a happy kid.”

You smile, your cheeks flushed.

“I have a brother, too,” he continues, “younger than me, or was. He’s probably in his thirties now.”

“Back on Earth?” You ask.

“Yeah. He was a dumb teenager, always partying and skipping class no matter how many times I talk to him about it.”

“I take it you’re the favourite?”

He grins. “Would you be shocked if I said I wasn’t?” Your eyebrows raise. “Nobody can put the foot down on the baby of the family. Plus, he’s a cute kid, probably because he looks like me.”

You roll your eyes and he bumps your shoulder with his hand. “Any pets?”

“Yeah,” he says, his tone dripping with a pleasant nostalgia. “A dog. Had him since I was young. He’s old but a trooper. He was still jumping when I left the house for the last time.”

You smile behind the melancholy. “You miss him?”

Jimin takes a quick sigh. “All the time.”

“What about school?” You ask as Jimin sips more wine.

“I loved it,” he says, grinning again. “Classes were a breeze, I had a good group of friends. They’ve all boarded on another starship, same day as me. They’re probably flying across the galaxy right now. One of them; Taehyung, he loved space. He couldn’t wait.”

Your eyebrows furrow. You could see that behind his small smile lies a broken heart. A family he can no longer reach out to, a reunion between friends he’d never get to attend; and they’ll never know why.

You tuck your bottom lip between your teeth, dolefulness in your eyes as you look at him. God, he didn’t deserve this.

“I—” Jimin continues and you snap out of your trance, “I met my fiancé in university.”

“Oh.” A sting pierces your stomach. “College sweethearts?”

He nods, looking down into his cup.

“What was she like?” You ask but you don’t want to know the answer.

“She was—” He swallows with difficulty and your breath runs short, “kind. Intelligent. She got me; my humor, my feelings.” He laughs nervously, picking up his glass and whirling it around. “I thought she was the perfect woman.”

Your teeth dig so deep into your lips, it almost rips the skin. The way his eyes glass over, knowing it’s because he’s thinking about somebody else—it stings.

There’s a long silence, the air running thin and the only noise is his red wine hitting the sides of the glass and your shallow breathing.

Then Jimin places his glass down, pausing before he speaks again.

“It sucks leaving people behind in the past,” he says, eyes hidden, “but it was even worse getting ripped away from what could have been a future.”

More silence. You start, “I’m sorry, I didn’t mean to—”

“Don’t feel bad,” Jimin finally looks up at you, his eyes glassy with tears. “It’s good to get it out of the system sometimes.”

Your eyes fall to the floor, your head pounding because the sight of him crying pains you and you can’t get it out of your head.

It’s silent for so long. Jimin lets his tears roll down and hit the surface of the wood, holding onto his glass with tight fingers. Your heart is furiously beating, but not in the good way. In a way that made you want to break down and shout.

“I—I know it sucks,” you start saying and the chock of a sob in your throat was evident, “it sucks remembering, and I’m so sorry. But—I want that. I want my memory back.”

A pause. Jimin looks at you.

“I don’t know—” you stop when you feel tears threatening to fall, “I don’t know if I have any family, any friends—a boyfriend. And if I did, I have no idea what they look like. It’s like they don’t exist, or maybe it’s that I don’t exist.”

“Y/N—”

“I don’t know if anybody’s missing me. If anybody cares whether I live or die here.”

“Don’t—”

“Jimin,” you’re sobbing now. “If only one of us could go back to sleep, it should be you, not me. Maybe I shouldn’t go back to sleep at all.”

He grips your shoulders. “Stop it—”

“You have so many people who care for you—”

“So do you!” He shakes you with desperation.

“How can you be so sure? I don’t even remember—”

“It doesn’t matter if you remember it or not!” You can barely see him anymore when your tears build up too much. “Maybe you don’t have family or friends back home, but it doesn’t matter now because I’m here. I care whether you live or die.”

You blink. Tears fall down your cheeks. You can’t say anything, and now neither can he. In the heat of the moment, he slips from his stool and wraps you in his arms.

It feels as though you stop breathing, and it’s because you do. You hold your breath hostage in his embrace, too shocked to do anything and too numb to feel your body. But you feel the adrenaline rush in him; his shaky hands against your back and his furiously beating heart in his chest. His hands tighten, bringing you even closer and now his mouth is too close to your neck, so close you can feel air hit your skin and the pad of his lips. You blink again and he doesn’t mind that your tears stain his shirt.

“I’m sorry,” you murmur. “I’m so so sorry.”

“So—am I,” he says in a broken whisper.

And just for a second, there wasn’t a wistful longing or unrequited feelings. You were just two people, stranded in the middle of nowhere, ripped from the rest of the world, and the only thing you have is each other.

That evening, you part from Jimin and head towards your cabin, every step slow and clumsy with the drowsiness of alcohol and the pain of heartache. You could barely sleep because your mind was plagued with so much sadness and regret and guilt, and a slivering feeling of yearn that you’re too proud to admit.

You’re afraid to see Jimin now because when you think of his face, so many things rush to your head, and you don’t want any of them. Not when it would tear Jimin apart from the person he cared and loved for the most. It wasn’t fair for her, and it definitely wouldn’t be fair for Jimin.

But as hours pass by in the dormancy of your bedsheets, those words on the tip of your tongue long to spill, and at some point a surge of courage runs through your veins, making you throw the sheets off your body and storm out the door.

You knew he wouldn’t reciprocate, not when he’s already in love and searching, and one day that’ll be okay with you. But right now, you needed to get it out so you could look into his eyes or hear his laugh without the sting in your heart and the covet of his affection. It’ll be one less thing to worry about.

You walk through the main lobby with a fist clenched around the material of your shirt, your heart pounding in your ears. He’s not in the pod room or the dinner hall, and for a second you wonder if he’s shut in his cabin and that this is a terrible idea and that you shouldn’t follow through and you should go back to bed—

Ta-ting. “Do you require assistance?”

You flinch. “God, you’re a little freaky sometimes.”

Silence.

“No, come back!” You plead. “Don’t be so like that.”

Ta-ting. “Do you require assistance?”

“Uh,” you say, scratching the back of your head, “don’t take this the wrong way, but—do you know where that other passenger is?”

“Obtaining information about the whereabouts requires either of the following; the passenger number or the full name.”

You groan. “Park Jimin.”

“Park Jimin is identified as Passenger 128, currently in the Swimming Pool.”

“Thanks, creep,” you say.

The pool? As far as you know, neither of you had taken the chance to use that room yet. You walk through its doors, the weight of what you’re about to do suddenly dawning on you.

Jimin sits on the pool edge, his white tee thrown over him and dipping his calves into the water. The sounds of the doors opening makes him turn his head, a small smile politely spread across his face.

“Hey,” he says.

“Hey. You swimming?”

“Just dipping my legs in,” Jimin says, turning back to the water and swinging his legs up and down through the ripples. “Wanna join?”

You hesitate. “Sure.”

You take a seat beside him with your legs tucked, the blue light of the water being the only source of light that illuminates his face, accentuating his shadows and lights on his face.

“They don’t have swim suits here?” You ask, looking around so you don’t look at him.

“Think they have some back in the cabins,” he says. “I only took the swim shorts.”

You look down just for a second to see his bare thighs wearing a pair of dark swimming shorts, pressed against the tiles. “Oh.”

“I don’t know if I was planning to swim anyways,” Jimin says, looking forward at the window into the stars.

“Just wanted to clear your mind?”

“There’s not much to do other than that,” he says.

You fail to return it. “Yeah, I guess.”

You could tell something was off with him, and it makes you forget what you came here for. Maybe this was a bad idea.

“Are you scared of water?” He asks, frowning at your tucked position.

“No,” you look at him through lidded eyes. “I just don’t want to wet my sweatpants.”

“Why not? It’ll dry.”

You bite your lip, thinking for a few seconds before complying and settling your legs into the pool. The coldness is a shock to you and you feel the material of your pants soak up the water. “Shh,” you hiss at the feeling.

Jimin chuckles. “Cold?”

You nod.

“It’ll warm up soon, don’t worry.”

You nod again, this time with a slight furrow in your eyebrows.

A silence falls over you, and for a second you worry what had happened that evening had changed how Jimin acts around you. He seemed to crack less jokes, smile a little less, put more distance between you two.

The only sounds that reverberate around the room is the ripples against the sides of the wall and against your legs.

“Um, Jimin,” you start to say. The frantic thrum of your pulse is almost palpable to him. “I was thinking, lately…”

Fuck, you stop yourself, your nerves uncontrollably tight. Your hand goes to clench your shirt again, fingers shaking. You can’t do this.

Your eyes widen as Jimin slides into the pool, going underwater to wet his hair and pushing it out of his face. “Come and join me, first.”

You close your gaping mouth. “It’s—cold.”

“Y/N—”

“And I’m wearing sweatpants.”

“Y/N—”

“And I’m on my period!”

He laughs from his stomach, and it seems like a sound you hadn’t heard in a while. “Get in!”

“Okay, okay,” you go along with his wishes, lifting your body carefully down into the water with the strength of your upper arms. “I’m in! You happy?” You yell in a faux outrage, your arms crossed.

“I’m ecstatic,” he says, throwing his head back for melodrama. He walks towards you, helping you warm up by rubbing his palms up and down your arms to create friction. Your breath hitches because he’s suddenly so close and you’re not sure where to look.

“I think I’m warm now,” you say, stepping past him. He releases the hold on your arms, watching you as you step closer to the deeper end.

“You know how to swim, right?” Jimin asks mockingly. “The deep end can be dangerous, you know.”

You scoff, turning back. “I learnt how to swim when I was 5.”

“I only learnt how to swim when I was 11,” Jimin says, following after you.

You smile. “That’s a little late, isn’t it?”

“I’m not big on sports, alright?” Jimin says, skimming the surface of the water to wet you.

You giggle, trying to block the splash. “You’re a cliché nerd.”

“What’s wrong with that?” He pouts.

“Nothing,” you say, splashing him when he doesn’t expect it. “I’m a nerd too.”

“But I’m a little nerdier.”

“Is that a translation of ‘I’m a little smarter’?” You raise an eyebrow, smirking.

“Not at all,” he says, splashing you again but this time you miss blocking it.

“I’ll show you how nerdy I am,” you challenge him and he grins. “Break Buddy and I’ll fix him.”

He gasps. “How dare you suggest such a thing? You’re not touching my son.” You start trying to run from him but you’re too slow so you get a face full of cold water.

You hide your mouth when you laugh. “This isn’t fair, my sweatpants are slowing me down!”

“Then don’t run and fight me like a real warrior,” he says, puffing up his chest.

“You’re lucky we’re working on a flat plain, otherwise you would never catch me,” your mouth tilts up with mischief.

“Hold up,” he pauses, “I think I remember reading—something—about different wave settings before I boarded.”

Your eyes widen. “No way! Like an ocean?”

“Maybe,” he smirks. “Wanna try?”

You nod fervently.

Ta-ting. “Happy you asked. There are three levels; you are currently on Level 1, the lowest one.”

“Turn it up a level!” You shout.

“Gladly.” Ta-ting.

Suddenly, the waves increase in ripple size, causing you and Jimin to sway back and forth. You lose your footing, falling to the side and laughing along the way. Jimin is joining you before he starts to lose his balance.

This reminds you of the ocean. You love the ocean. You love the sun hitting your skin and the grain of the sand and the saltiness of the water.

“I just remembered something!” You yell over the sound of the ripples.

“Really?” Jimin asks, grinning. “What?”

“I love the ocean!”

“I’m more of a pool kinda person,” Jimin says and you roll your eyes.

“You look more like you don’t leave the house,” you retort, catching him off guard.

“Not true, take a look at my golden skin.” You roll your eyes but can’t help but to look anyways. “I think we can crank it up more level, what do you think?”

“Let’s go for it,” you say, stumbling from side to side.

“Stacy, turn it up to Level 3!” He yells above.

You frown. “Her name is not—”

Ta-ting. “Hold tight.”

This time, the waves are so powerful that your feet lose contact with the floor.

“Oh my god,” you say in between your laughs. You lose sight of Jimin as he goes under the waves, emerging with a beaming face and chocked giggles.

“Y/N!” He yells. “Don’t drown!”

“Not planning—”

A wave rolls over you, swallowing you whole and you fight to break through the surface for a breath of air. “Ji—”

“Hold my hand!” He’s drifted far from you, riding on another wave to get closer. His hand is reached out for you to hold onto but you’re too far away. Instead, you’re pushed backwards, back towards the wall, the strength of the water too much.

“I can’t!” You shout. “You’re too far—” You swallow some water.

Jimin lets the momentum of the waves take him towards you, fueling the speed more with his arms cutting the surface of the water and his legs kicking back.

“Eve!” You yell with urgency, nearing the wall and fearing hitting your head. “Level 1, Level 1, Level 1!”

Ta-ting. “Water setting on Level 1. Wait for waves to settle.”

Jimin gets on his feet now, running across the length of the pool floor with the still-harsh waves pushing at his back. He stumbles forward but recovers quick enough to pull you back away from the wall. Then he’s placing his fingers on the back of your head just as the tides move forward once more, crashing the back of his hand with the hard tiles behind you.

He groans in pain but lets the waves swing him back and forth, hitting his hand over and over again.

“Jimin,” you mumble, “your—”

“It’s okay,” he laughs under his breathe.

He winces again.

“God, let’s never do that again.” He mumbles as the waves push forward again and his hand makes hard contact. “That is a death trap.”

“Jimin,” you say, holding onto the forearm that was supporting your head. “Your hand.”

“It’s okay, Y/N,” Jimin smiles from cheek to cheek. “Look, the waves are so calm now.”

You’re rocking back and forth, the waves no longer violent and enticing you to lean against the wall behind you, making Jimin remove his hand from its position.

You take it, holding its sides with carefulness. His knuckles are rubescent, pink from the pain and he flinches when you smooth the pad of it with your fingers.

Your chest is so light, a feeling of delirium running through your mind at his actions, and especially at how he looks down at you; drops of water falling down his cheeks from his wet strands of hair, his eyes dark and so warm.

You want to kiss the front of his hand, wanting to give him a surge of warmth from your lips against his skin. But then, he’s not yours to kiss.

“Y/N,” he mumbles. “Did you hit your head?”

A beat. “No,” you answer, letting go of his hand.

“Glad to hear. You don’t need to lose more brain cells as it is.”

You laugh, naturally burying your face into his wet shoulder and it’s too late to realize the weight of your actions before you can stop.

You hear Jimin sigh, and then the feeling of his hand on the small of your back. He moves slowly, so not to startle you, and once it’s settled in its position, he rubs it up and down soothingly.

You don’t know how long you remain like that. Time never seems like a concept when you’re with him. The waves relax into a flat state, only tiny ripples making contact with your bodies and pushing him into to you in centimeters.

“Jimin,” you whisper.

He hums.

“It’s getting late.”

He pulls back, slipping his hand out from behind you and your chin dropping from his shoulder. “You’re right,” he says, nodding slightly. “You must be cold.”

“Not anymore,” you say, biting the inside of your cheek.

Jimin exits the pool first, offering a hand to help pull you up. You accept it, lunging into his arms again from the force. You pull away just as quickly, murmuring a timid ‘thank you.’

Jimin walks to the side of the room to remove two sets of towels from the wall hooks.

“How thoughtful of them,” you comment, smiling as he hands you one and you wrap it around yourself.

“Yeah, they have towels, but not changing rooms or swimsuits,” Jimin says, walking alongside you.

“That’s just asking too much,” you add and he chuckles.

Once again, you find yourself parting with Jimin at the entrance of the cabin hallway. You suddenly remember how you hadn’t told Jimin about your feelings, and maybe this was a sign that it’s a bad idea, that you shouldn’t follow through. And you take that sign.

“Well, see you tomorrow,” you draw out, holding tight onto the towel draped around you.

Jimin nods at the floor. “See you. Night.”

“Night.”

You turn your heel, walking down the corridor echoing your every step. You sigh, closing your eyes shut at the amount of chances you had missed. You’re an idiot, and you can’t even own up to it.

You arrive at your cabin, the doors sliding open. You’re about to step through when the doors shut close again, inches away from your face. You jump back, confusion painting your face. “What the hell,” you murmur under your breath.

You step back and then forward again, the doors opening and then shutting immediately after.

“Are you fucking—” you curse, running your fingers through your hair. “I’m freezing. Eve!”

Ta-ting. “Do you—”

“What’s wrong with my door?” You demand.

“Please specify which door is experiencing issues.”

You sigh. “Door to Cabin 4-8-3.”

Moments pass. “There seems to be an issue in the wiring of the motion sensory.”

“No duh,” you groan. “Is there a way to fix it?”

“Reparation will take approximately—12 hours.”

You roll your head back in frustration. “12 hours? For a single door? For 1 out of your 2 passengers?”

“The reparation system is not under my program’s control,” she says.

You scoff. “Oh, okay. Nice excuse.” Your heart starts beating when it hits you. “Where is Cabin 1-2-8?”

You knock on the door, once, twice.

Seconds pass, then the doors slide open and Jimin’s standing there, a new white tee backwards on him and a towel wrapped around his waist. “Uh, sorry, I was taking a shower,” he apologizes, flustered in the face.

“It’s okay,” you say slowly. “Um, this is going to sound strange and you can decline if you want, but my cabin door, it’s malfunctioned and—I basically can’t get in.”

He continues standing there, wide eyed and blinking. “So—”

“I kinda—have nowhere to sleep,” you say, shivering when a particularly cold gush of wind hits you.

Jimin steps aside, allowing you to walk in without another word. The doors shut behind you and you’re left with little space between you and him in the narrow corridor.

“Uh,” he stutters, “can I just finish my shower? It’ll take two minutes max.”

“Yeah, of course,” you nod, staring down at the floor rather than him.

“You can sit on the bed, I don’t mind if it gets wet,” Jimin adds, slipping into the bathroom.

“Okay, thank you,” you smile earnestly just as his face disappears past the door’s opening.

You walk past the corridor and into the main of the room, taken aback at just how different it is, almost three times the size of yours. The bed is a king size, the panel behind it emitting warm LED lights that soften the glow of the room. He has two large windows into space, on either side of the bed.

You place the towel onto the sheets of the bed and take a seat, idly tapping your feet against the bed frame.

He exits the bathroom, fully dressed and a towel on his shoulders, timidly walking towards you. “You can take a shower now, if you want.”

“Oh, yeah, thanks,” you say, standing up. “Oh, my clothes—”

“You can take mine,” Jimin interrupts, heading towards the closet, folding a shirt and pair of sweatpants onto the palm of his hands. “It might be a bit big on you.”

You smile. “That’s okay,” you say, taking it from him, his touch lingering on yours.

The bathroom is beautiful, grand too. You strip down, stepping into the shower and letting the warmth of the shower head take over your body. Left in your own thoughts, your heart starts racing again. The thought of sharing a bed with Jimin made you want to curl into a ball, your fingers nervously shaking as they run through your hair.

His clothes are a bit big on you, but you don’t mind at all. You lean into the material to smell it, maybe seeing if his scent lies laced in it.

You rest your palms against the sink, your eyebrows furrowing as you contemplate what to do. Do you confess? It felt hardly appropriate, not after today and not when you lie in the same bed as him.

You turn of the tap, the cold water creating a harsh sensation against your warm face.

He’s not yours.

He’s not yours to kiss, to confess to.

He has somebody.

You exit the bathroom with a heavy heart and Jimin is already tucked into bed, lying on his side. He turns at the sound of your footsteps.

“Hey,” he greets.

You smile sadly. “Hey.”

You walk towards the other side, slipping into the sheets and lying on your back so you’re not directly facing him.

“The clothes fit okay?”

“Yeah, a little big, but it’s comfy.”

You hear him huff a chuckle. “Do you like the room?”

You nod. “It’s enormous. Your bathroom is the size of my whole room.”

Jimin laughs.

“And that view,” you trail off, turning your head so you can look it and consequently meeting his eyes. “It’s gorgeous.”

“You say that all the time,” he says teasingly.

“Because it’s true all the time,” you laugh.

“Wonder when we’ll see another comet. Maybe we’ll sling shot around a star.”

Your eyes widen. “That would be awesome,” you say with a grin, “Anybody would die for a sight like that.”

Jimin nods, a comforted silence following. “You remembered something today.”

“Did I?”

“Ha, ironic,” Jimin jokes. “The ocean.”

“Oh, yeah,” you smile at the thought.

“What about the ocean?”

“I just remembered the sensations. Salt and sand. The sun.”

“No specific memories?” Jimin asks. You turn to the side so you can fully look at him, aware of how dangerous that is.

“Not really. I got a vision of the sea. Maybe I used to go to that one in particular,” you say quietly. “I’m not sure.”

“Well, that’s great you remembered something,” Jimin grins. “I told you, your memory’s gonna come back.”

“At this rate, I’ll be 80 by the time that happens,” you chuckle.

“Small steps become big leaps.”

A pause. “That is the lamest thing I’ve ever heard you say.” Jimin starts laughing uncontrollably, grabbing for his stomach to nurse. “Scratch that, the lamest thing I’ve ever heard anybody say,” you add just to make him laugh more.

“Don’t crush my dreams,” he says through the laughter. “I’ve wanted to be a life coach ever since I was young.”

“Stick to your day job,” you retort. “How’s your hand?” You ask when his laughs die down into soft giggles.

“Oh, don’t worry about it,” Jimin’s tone changes, turning deeper and a little more serious.

“We can probably find a first aid kit tomorrow,” you continue, your eyebrows creasing.

Jimin smiles shyly. “It’s not a problem. I’m a strong guy.”

“If you say so,” you grin. “But I think bandages would look cool as like—a battle scar.”

A hair strand falls down in front of his face and his fingers go to tuck it behind his ear. “That’s true. I need to assert my dominance on this ship. Show the other males I’m Alpha Passenger.”

“Why are you so lame today?” Your face twists.

“Go to sleep,” Jimin says, turning around to turn off the bedside light. “Are you comfortable?”

“Yeah.”

“Do you have enough space?”

“Yes.”

“You can kick me out of the bed whenever you want to.”

“Yeah right.”

“Yeah, that one was a joke,” Jimin says, the smile evident in his voice. “Night.”

“Night,” you say, turning on your back.

Jimin falls asleep quickly and you can hear his breathing slow steadily, his movements ceasing. All the lights had turned off but the nearby stars emit light bright enough for you to turn your head to the side and make out his features.

You feel your heart jump at the sight and you give in, turning your whole body to the side slowly and with care so as not to wake his sleeping figure. From this view, you feel as though you can lull yourself to sleep just by looking at him.

He was so beautiful; a rose with thorns that’ll break your skin if you touch him. His pouty lips looked even more pink in the dark and his complexion was golden even in the absence of a sun, his eyelashes seeming to brush against his flushed cheeks. A single strand of hair falls in front of his face again.

The stars were absolutely nothing compared to him.

You sigh, unable to breathe steadily because he’s making you so dizzy and lightheaded, even more so when he starts to crunch his nose as the ends of his hair strand tickle his skin.

He was a rose with thorns, but you still find yourself lifting a hand and reaching forward so you can tuck the hair behind his ear and relieve his discomfort.

Then Jimin peels his eyes open.

A long pause.

“What are you doing?” He asks.

A beat. “Swatting a fly.” You flick your hovering hand for effect.

Another pause. “In—space?”

“Space—flies.” You flick again. “Think I got it this time.”

The sides of his mouth lifts up. “You know, if you wanted to kiss me, you could just do it.”

You can’t say anything.

Silence.

“I—” you try to say but stutter.

You can’t answer even if you wanted to because you can barely hear your thoughts above the beating of your heart in your eardrums.

He moves closer, fumbling through the bed sheets inch by inch. You gasp when you feel the warmth of his palm press against the small of your back, bringing you closer to him.

“Ji—” you whisper, breathless. “Jimin—”

“Do you want to kiss me?” He mumbles, craning his neck closer. You can feel his breath hit your skin and hear his eyelashes blink together. His eyes dig into you, so dark and so warm.

You flinch as his nose makes contact, the side of his nostrils brushing over yours as his forehead presses against your skin. You can feel the warmth from his face. His quick panting against your mouth. His lips only centimeters away from yours.

“Jimin,” you say again, your mind going crazy. You feel the heaviness of your eyelids and not from the sleepiness. They fall, almost fluttering close and answering his question.

Then you pin a hand on his chest in between your bodies, stopping him.

“I can’t,” you whisper, almost choking at your words.

Jimin pulls away from the comfort of your face. “Why not?” He asks, his voice straining.

“I just—can’t,” you shut your eyes so you can stop the tears.

“Is this about—” he’s about to say but stops. You don’t answer and no words need to be exchanged. “Y/N…”

“Jimin,” you say, looking away, your voice muffled and chocked up, “I’m sorry for—waking up—instead of her.”

The hand on your back, still so present to your senses, begins rubbing up and down. “Don’t say that,” he says with some assertiveness.

“I—” You inhale deeply, “I can’t take you away from somebody else.”

He doesn’t say anything for a while and your hands go to clench the pillow between your fingers.

A surge of courage runs through you as you lift your head back up, staring him right in his eyes. “Do you—still—love her?”

He breaks eye contact with you, falling down and biting his lip nervously, and by turn, answering you.

Burying your face into the pillow to hide away from him and everything about him, your heart simply breaks.

His hand lifts, resting it against the back of your head. “Y/N,” he mumbles, “listen.”

You shake your head. It’s selfish, but you can’t help yourself. You don’t want to hear him. You almost don’t want to remember him just so your heart can stop aching like this.

“She—” he starts, pausing. “Her name was Sooyoung.”

Your fists tighten around the pillow.

“And—I’ll never stop—caring—for her. She means a lot to me, Y/N.”

It hurts, so much.

You’re crying now, wetting the material with your tears and allowing it to muffle the escaping whines from your lips.

“But—” He speaks so slowly, making you hang pendulously onto his words through the pain. “I can’t deny how I feel about you.”

“Don’t say that,” you lift your face up. “You don’t mean that—”

“I fell in love with you.”

“Jimin,” you whimper. “Stop…”

“I love you, and I’m sorry everything has to be so complicated for you. You don’t deserve that. You deserve somebody who doesn’t hurt you like I do.”

It’s too much to look at him. It’s too much.

He strokes your hair when you rest your face against his shoulder, not for the intimacy but for the stability.

“I thought I was marrying the love of my life,” he continues, “but then I wake up and meet you and—somehow—you make this awful nightmare possible to go through. I don’t know how you do it, but you make me want to live and die here with you.”

“Jimin,” you whisper, “you don’t mean that…”

“I really do.” He sighs. “You have no idea how much I do.”

“Jimin,” you clutch your fingers, so overwhelmed and unable to think straight.

“I don’t want you to feel guilty because of me anymore,” he says as he rests his cheek against your head. “Please don’t. Please just be happy. Kiss me if that’s what you want to do.”

You lift your head, leaning forward and meeting your lips halfway.

His lips press earnestly against yours, so plush and so soft and so warm. He tastes like choked sobs and the saltiness of tears but he smiles through, placing a hand against your waist and thumbing the skin over and over.

“Jimin,” you break away, already so breathless and winded. “I’m so in love with you.”

He grins, blinking and tears roll down. “I’m going crazy right now.”

You chuckle, burying your face into his neck to indulge in his warmth and his touch. “I don’t want to go too fast,” you confess. “I need some—time to be okay about everything.”

Jimin rubs his hands over your waist, kissing your cheek. “We don’t have to rush, sweetheart. We have all the time in the whole universe.”

You fall asleep like this, the fast pacing of your hearts slowing down and your limbs entangled with his. You fall asleep to the rhythmic rise and fall of his chest against your face. And most of all, you fall asleep with the taste of his lips on yours and his words of a confession running through your head; something you thought you could only have in dreams.

part 2 coming soon!

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