#two giant obstacles in the way but people just assume it's going to happen because...the show I guess | Explore Tumblr Posts and Blogs

icinch · 2 years

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Create a $300 Training Program in 7 Days

New Post has been published on https://www.cinchhomebiz.com/create-a-300-training-program-in-7-days/

Create a $300 Training Program in 7 Days

…even if you’re the world’s worst procrastinator.

I’ve used this technique to create all sorts of things, from a free bonus I put together and gave away for an affiliate product, all the way up to $1,000 training programs.

Creating content and products is a huge obstacle for most marketers because it takes so much time and effort.

But what if you had a way to create products – such as expensive training programs – that you could finish in a week?

And better still, what if you got paid for them before they were even done?

The first key you need is a big, fat, public DEADLINE.

If your deadline is public, then you will move heaven and earth to get it done – or at least I hope you will.

If you don’t, you’re in for some major public ridicule and embarrassment, not to mention the fact that you are letting people down.

The second key here – and this goes hand in hand with the first – is you’re going to sell what you’re selling BEFORE it’s created.

You tell people what you’re creating, you tell them when it’s going to be done, and you sell it before you ever make it.

And in the case of a training program, you’re going to create your product LIVE and then continue to sell the recordings as a product after the event.

So, in a nutshell – decide what you’re selling. Tell the world what you’re selling and when it will take place, and take orders. Hold the live event, create the product and continue to sell it.

Here are the details:

This works best if you are already good at something. This way, you know the material and don’t need to do any research. If you need research, then you might need to add a day or two to this process or use this shortcut – bring in an expert.

If you’re using experts, then you can cover any topic. Or every topic. Because no matter what your topic is, there is someone out there that can do the actual teaching for you – you just split the profits with them.

For the rest of this article, we’ll assume you’re the one with the information.

Set a deadline, because with a deadline and a hundred or so people depending on you to get your work done, you will get the work done. It’s that simple. They’ve put their money on you, and they believe in you.

You will not let them down, which ensures the training course you’re making – which would normally be finished in a month or two – is completed in a week’s time.

Deadlines are magic this way, regardless of whether or not you naturally procrastinate. Without a deadline, your work expands to fill the time. This doesn’t necessarily mean a better product – it just means it takes longer to make.

You can be surprisingly nimble with this method, getting products out fast on hot topics and things people want right now.

Figure out what the big 5 to 7 things are that you want to cover. What are the big ideas? What are the giant take-aways?

Instead of writing a sales letter, write bullet points. Remember, you’re doing this FAST. Don’t write a giant sales letter, write the high points. Tell them what they’re going to discover and how it’s going to benefit them through bullet points. Use curiosity, too.

You’re going to do a webinar. Create a Powerpoint with an intro and all of the major points. Let people ask questions at the end, because some of your very best material will come from the questions, things you didn’t even think of.

Cut up your recording into parts and sell it as a course. You’ll have an intro, and each of the major points. You might also want to get it transcribed and then edit the transcription to give your customers a written copy, too.

Selling your course BEFORE you make it gives you a DEADLINE. You’re telling people when the live event will happen. You’re giving them a deadline, too, because they have to sign up before the deadline or they will miss the class.

Once you hold the class, upload the webinar into the members area and give access to everyone who bought. Some people will make it to the live event, some won’t, but they all get access to the recordings.

If there is something you feel you can do better, go ahead and record it again. Make a new recording of that section and replace it in the member’s section.

That’s the beauty of this system – you get it done fast, but it doesn’t have to be perfect. If you feel like it, you can go back and improve on it. And if you omitted something, make a new recording for that, too.

And what if you create a flop? That’s not even possible with this system. If you promote a product you’re going to create and no one buys, then you know not to waste your time making it.

Using this simple system, you get paid before you ever create your products, and you can crank products out faster than ever before. Plus, you can sell the recordings for a long time to come.

Just imagine if you create a new product every two weeks. In a year’s time you’ll have 26 new products you can continue to sell, repurpose, use as bonuses, sell the rights to and so forth. 26 new launches, 26 new products and 26 new revenue generators.

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grabyourluck-blog · 2 years

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Create a $300 Training Program in 7 Days

New Post has been published on https://www.referral-master.com/create-a-300-training-program-in-7-days/

Create a $300 Training Program in 7 Days

…even if you’re the world’s worst procrastinator.

I’ve used this technique to create all sorts of things, from a free bonus I put together and gave away for an affiliate product, all the way up to $1,000 training programs.

Creating content and products is a huge obstacle for most marketers because it takes so much time and effort.

But what if you had a way to create products – such as expensive training programs – that you could finish in a week?

And better still, what if you got paid for them before they were even done?

The first key you need is a big, fat, public DEADLINE.

If your deadline is public, then you will move heaven and earth to get it done – or at least I hope you will.

If you don’t, you’re in for some major public ridicule and embarrassment, not to mention the fact that you are letting people down.

The second key here – and this goes hand in hand with the first – is you’re going to sell what you’re selling BEFORE it’s created.

You tell people what you’re creating, you tell them when it’s going to be done, and you sell it before you ever make it.

And in the case of a training program, you’re going to create your product LIVE and then continue to sell the recordings as a product after the event.

So, in a nutshell – decide what you’re selling. Tell the world what you’re selling and when it will take place, and take orders. Hold the live event, create the product and continue to sell it.

Here are the details:

For the rest of this article, we’ll assume you’re the one with the information.

You will not let them down, which ensures the training course you’re making – which would normally be finished in a month or two – is completed in a week’s time.

You can be surprisingly nimble with this method, getting products out fast on hot topics and things people want right now.

Figure out what the big 5 to 7 things are that you want to cover. What are the big ideas? What are the giant take-aways?

If there is something you feel you can do better, go ahead and record it again. Make a new recording of that section and replace it in the member’s section.

And what if you create a flop? That’s not even possible with this system. If you promote a product you’re going to create and no one buys, then you know not to waste your time making it.

Using this simple system, you get paid before you ever create your products, and you can crank products out faster than ever before. Plus, you can sell the recordings for a long time to come.

0 notes

tarosin · 3 years

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the great adventures of y/n tommy jack tubbo and george

requested yes/no

part 5 of the great adventures series

summary: training for the military

warning: cursing

AN: really sorry about this tumblr won’t let me change/add paragraphs so could look very weird

the journey there was quick for you, you spent the trip asleep in the back of the car whilst the others were discussing what you were all about to do “How difficult do you think it’s going to be” “dude it’s a military assault course” you woke up halfway there to the noise of the radio playing “afternoon y/n”“afternoon sorry I fell asleep I’m not used to being woken up early in the morning, I blame you guys and ranboo”“y/n have you ever wanted to join the military” “I can't say I have no” “well you’re going to love what we’re doing” “what are we doing” “you’ll see!”

you stood picking up more rocks and handing them to tubbo whilst Tommy and George began to film the introduction to the vlog “were in the jungle” confused you turned to tubbo “psst tubbo what the fuck are we doing, why are we in a woods” before tubbo had time to answer Tommy already began to answer your question telling you that you’re all training for the military, not taking him seriously you started laughing as you all were walking it was only when you were handed a jumpsuit to cover your clothes you realised it wasn’t a joke, you would be lying if you said you were ready for this, after all, you spent your free time playing Minecraft you wasn’t exactly great at sports

you managed to put the jumpsuit on pretty quickly unlike Tommy who was quite clearly struggling to get it on over his trainers “come on sergeant simons were doing a military assault course and you’re struggling to put on the clothes”after struggling to put clothes on the five of you stood together getting photos whilst you all looked decent “me and my boys in the jungle” “This isn’t going to go well” “we’re going to destroy it” “NO”

you hadn’t even reached the course yet and you were already tripping up over rocks and sticks that were on the muddy trail “we’re walking to our deaths..y/n is already falling over” “Hey I didn’t sign up to do exercise” once you finally reached the start of the course you were met with a canon, a dog and a man in a yellow jumper you stood as a team listening to what you were about to do and how you were actually a team of six, you hoped he meant the dog was a team member but no turns out the canon was the sixth member

“We have to take the canon with us” “...and take it apart into six pieces at each obstacle and rebuild it ” you handed your phone to the Russ, not trusting yourself to keep it on you especially since you were already tripping up before reaching the assault course “thank you” “good luck” “huh” you didn’t have time to process what was said as Mr military began counting down from three, the five of you ran to the first obstacle tubbo dragging the canon Tommy climbed over the net first with tubbo following after “What happens if I fall” it was as though you and tubbo had read each other’s mind as you both responded with “you’ll die” “death” you climbed over next with a wheel “reckon I can slide down the net” “that will hurt y/n don’t do- and you’re already doing it” you slid down the net despite George telling you not to do so, it didn’t take too long for the others to get over, you all began reassembling the canon “can we talk about our feelings” “I feel like shit I jumped out of a plane not long ago now I feel like I’m doing PE all over again” “Y/N JUST HELP BUILD THE CANON” “I'M TRYING ODDLY ENOUGH I'M NOT BUILT FOR THE MILITARY”once the canon was built Tommy and tubbo ran off with it “who’s going to tell them we need to test it” once Mr military shouted they ran back “why do we have to do this” “it’s the fucking rules Tommy and life is full of them” “like taxes” “tax fraud” a few seconds later the five of you yelled “bang” neither of you saying it at the same time “it didn’t work” “yes it did now come on”

you all ran towards the next obstacle, a giant wall. you all quickly dismantled the canon, Tommy went over first and began bickering with Mr military about him not being his dad whilst you tubbo and jack struggled to pass over the heaviest part of the canon “lift and lift” “really George? I thought we could just throw it over and hope he catches it” “Please don’t do that” “I am very sorry George but I'm struggling here” you continued your struggling tubbo tried to help Tommy through his words “you’re strong bossman I believe in you” “by the way, you really picked the shortest people to do this” part of the canon landed with a thud “welp hope he’s not dead” you climbed over next again carrying the wheel “he’s not dead guys don’t worry” you laughed as George took his time getting over the wall “I'm poving” “GET OVER THE WALL” you all stood questioning what time you were on completely forgetting that you were supposed to reassemble the canon “This is going to be embarrassing” “you guys could be rebuilding the canon” you could have built and tested the canon quickly however Tommy George and tubbo began telling people to subscribe whilst you built the canon with jack “we’re so good at this” “heh maybe not” you all test-fired the canon and made your way to the next obstacle

you were sent to go over the rope first, this was extremely difficult for you, the rope kept swaying as you walked causing you to lose your balance on multiple occasions “step on the V” “I’m going to fall” you made it over after a couple of minutes, like tubbo you also felt a bit ill, you assumed it was because it was quite hot and a lot was going on “how you feeling y/n” “Honestly, I’m jealous of ranboo, he’s at home living his best life and I’m in the middle of the woods overheating and climbing but no it’s pretty funny watching the others” you laughed as you overheard tubbo talking about how they’re only three obstacles in and how he’s going to die “YOU GOT THIS TUBBO!” Tommy crossed next, like you, he took his time he was then followed by tubbo who was trying to speed run walking over the rope you waited for jack and George cheering them on whilst Tommy was asking around for water and complaining about wearing a gamer hoodie. at this point, everyone seemed unmotivated “3 2 1.. bang”

“oh lovely..tires” tubbo went through first with the heaviest part of the canon “ill help you tubbo” you following behind helping him carry it due to it being stupidly heavily “so how are you tubbo” “AAAAAAAAAAA” “aye me too bud” you and tubbo decided that from now you two were going to work as a pair so it would be easier for you both, over the past few weeks tubbo became one of your closest friends the pair of you even started trending on Twitter as you did an irl stream where you both went on a walk at the beach and met several fans. whilst you and tubbo were making your way through Tommy jack and George we’re trying to figure out who should take what. “there’s piss in this one” “what the fuck?!” the pair of you finally got out from the tires “good job you two” “thank you” you rested your head on tubbos shoulder trying to get your breath back “I don’t think I’m made for the military” a few moments later Tommy made it to the tire full of water and put his finger in it “PEE” “Tommy why-” you stood looking around at the scenery, the sound of Tommy yelling about crawling away from George and that he’s ‘touched the piss’ was enough the drag you away from your own thoughts, you watched the others struggling to get through the tires and was amazed at the fact tubbo went back in to help them. you tried to ignore Tommy and George being dramatic as you tried to figure out how many more obstacles you had to go but you got distracted by George “ill just eat you if you die” “Mr military I’d like some help right about now” you walked over to Tommy and helped him get out of the tires “thanks y/n” “welcome” “how you doing bossman you know I pulled through your part...what are you doing that’s George's water” Tommy decided to throw the bottle to you so you could have a drink as he remembered you’d not had a drink since you landed from jumping out of the plane “Thanks, Tommy” “YOU BOTH DRANK GEORGES WATER” “he can drink the piss” “what Tommy said” you laughed as you walked over to where jack was in the tires “ HI JACK” “Jesus christ you scared me, hi y/n” you stood waiting for everyone to finish “I know exactly what the slowest time was” “we’re going for a new record it’s fine” “of being the slowest?” “yeah” “you know what Mr military ill clart you” “you’ll what me” “I’m gonna just go over here” you walked over to where parts of the canon were and got ready to assemble it again whilst George began throwing water over jack and tubbo to bless them then did the same to Tommy, you hid behind a tree thinking he wouldn’t notice you, however, he did and within a minute you too had water poured on you “Thanks, I was thirsty” “oh we know” “The fuck is that supposed to mean” “HELP BUILD THE CANON PLEASE” like last time you all built the canon tested it and ran to the next obstacle

“can we just you know drag the already built canon under there with us” “absolutely not” “I tried” you all disassembled it again and like last time you and tubbo went first crawling under “I don’t want to alarm you all but it is soaking wet in here” “delightful” a few moments later you were both working well “tubbo I’m scared of the dark and it’s pitch black” “you’ve got this bossman we’re almost done” you calmed down quickly until Tommy decided to jump above the pair of you

“SORRY” “TOMMY I SWEAR TO GOD” “YOU DICK” you laughed slightly and tubbo checked up on you “you okay?” “I'm fine if you’re fine” “come on let’s finish this thing” the pair of you continued and finished relatively quickly tubbo got out first “NEVER AGAIN” “Sorry about that buddy” “WHAT THE HELL IS WRONG WITH YOU” you helped push part of the canon out so tubbo could easily drag it out he then reached out so you could hold his hand and help pull you out “I've never been so happy to see the light” the pair of you sat on the floor waiting for the others to finish, you both made a bet on who was going to laugh first somehow you won as tubbo laughed at George and jack struggling to crawl through “YOU LAUGHED” “OH SHITTT” Russ came over to you both whilst recording so he could ask about how everything’s going “I’m covered in mud and the jumpsuit is wet, it isn’t a good day for the y/n community it was dark as hell in there “Tommy is a dick and tried to kill me and y/n” “I DIDN'T TRY TO KILL YOU BOTH” “I think he heard us” “WE ALL DID WERE NOT DEAF” “NO, BUT ACCORDING TO INSTAGRAM YOU'RE DEAD” you stared directly into the camera “sometimes it’s like I still hear jack talking to me” George and jack started complaining about how much further the is to go and how it was dirty and Tommy's response about being sorry it doesn’t fit their tory lifestyle made you burst out laughing “YOU LAUGHED” “tubbo my beloved you laughed ages ago you’ve already lost” “But we’re equal now” “no” the pair of you stood bickering to the point you didn’t realise the others had finished the obstacle and were shouting for you to test the canon “Y/N TUBBO WE NEED TO TEST THE CANON” the pair of you ran over “3 2 1 BANG”

“just going to warn you all you see that black cloud over there” “oh yay a storm is coming” you grabbed a wheel and followed behind jack across the wooden bridge “y/n he’s been splintered” “oh no poor George” “these are my gaming fingers” “no gaming for you I guess” “Stop talking about gaming dickheads” you spent a lot of time talking to George and jack whilst crossing over trying not to fall over you all even made a few plans to stream a laugh and the stream ends on jacks channel soon

you were all building the canon again whilst being informed you weren’t even halfway through and already 40 minutes in “high score” “well it’s definitely high” “Y/N??” “coming tubbo hang on my shoelace came undone” after tying your shoelace you grabbed a wheel and caught up to tubbo “if you go over tubbo ill pass it over to you and we can keep doing that” this method worked well for you both tubbo would climb over you would pass the wheel and middle part of the canon then climb over and repeat the process you heard Tommy in the background complaining about the fact he’s wearing jeans and jacks response “Yeah but I’m wearing jeans” “tubbo and y/n are almost done and you’re complaining about jeans” “jean boy pops off” “I'M WEARING JEANS AS WELL QUIT COMPLAINING” “Can we just go home and play smash bros” “Tommy this was your idea I didn’t even get on an option” “Sorry about that y/n but you get to spend time with me and gogy” “lucky me” you weren’t going to lie this was hard work and you were exhausted you felt like you could just fall asleep right where you were stood however tubbo wasn’t going to let that happen “I’m never going on an adventure with Tommy again” “me either” this of course was bullshit and you were both going on another adventure soon you stood watching your friends struggle to get over the obstacles you decided to offer your support and went to help jack and George using a similar method to that you used with tubbo “thanks y/n” “anytime” “y/n you could have helped me, tubbo pulled me over I could have been injured” “very sorry to hear that sergeant simons sucks to suck I guess” you all reassembled the canon tested it and ran to the next obstacle “I hate it here” “there’s a storm on the way” “Thanks, y/n for the input” “welcome George” you all noticed the net luckily you didn’t have to disassemble the canon this very well could be because you were running far behind and a storm was on its way. you watched as the others went through and joked about tubbo losing his shoe and Tommy getting stuck, this obstacle wasn’t made for you either as you kept getting caught on the net “I'VE BEEN CAUGHT AGAIN” jack lifted the net for you again so you could easily crawl through “thank you jack” you all then made it to the next obstacle Tommy crawled on the metal bars with you following after him whilst George used the monkey bars once you all made it across you had to walk across many metal planks used to form a bridge Tommy walked close behind you knowing you were extremely clumsy and didn't want you to fall “irl nettles” “The fuck are you on about Tommy I don’t think you’re following my advice about going outside” you all dissembled the canon as you got to the tires the only difference this time was you needed to climb over them “it’s rather windy” “there’s dirt in my eye” like before you and tubbo used the same method “look at them go” “I LIKE A DA BEE” “I'M SCARED OF BEES” “oh okay” “Why do they keep taking the plank” “I don’t know tubbo just takes it and y/n follows” you both finished rather quickly and neither of you got injured or fell “really good job you two” “thank you Mr military” you stood leaning on tubbo watching George pick up random rocks and put them into his pocket similar to what you had been doing the entire way around the course “I don’t think George or y/n have been outside before they keep picking things up like souvenirs” “Y/N GEORGE HAVE YOU EVER BEEN IN THE RAIN BEFORE” both of you just stared at Tommy making him laugh you helped the others get across the tires and even helped prevent Tommy from falling a couple of times. unfortunately, you ended up twisting your ankle but tried to ignore it not wanting to ruin the vlog for anyone, not that you would have, however it was clear you were in pain as you had started limping. one at a time you all crossed the rope “This is me climbing I am climbing” you cheered everybody on and then it was your turn

unlike the others the rope kept shaking as you walked across mainly because you were scared of falling and in pain all whilst trying to rush, this was clearly your least favourite obstacle of the day “take your time y/n don’t fall” “thank you jack I'm trying my best I promise” once at the end of the rope, Tommy took the wheel off you and helped you get down and pulled you into a quick side hug “you’re doing great let’s go we’re almost done” you knew your friends wouldn’t make you continue if you really didn’t want to however you were nearly finished and was determined to finish. you all reassembled the canon and made your way to the next obstacle

“there’s no way we’re getting through that without twanging a rope” “good luck” you and tubbo made your way through the ropes trying not to hit them, this proved to be a pretty impossible task and you ended up twanging the ropes several times, this mixed with everyone else’s failure to cross without hitting the rope meant you all had to do 20 push-ups, after reassembling the canon twice as you all didn’t do it correctly the first time and testing it you all had to do the push-ups “I’m sure y/n and George only did 3” “sorry bossman”

you all were finally making your way to the last obstacle determined to finish “Big Russ can we go to McDonald's after this” “sure” the five of you cheered and ran the last obstacle quickly disassembling the canon, you led the way over the obstacle tubbo Tommy jack and George following behind you, despite tubbo losing his shoe and George going backwards the five of you quickly completed the obstacle and reassembled and tested the canon running over to the finishing line

you all finally completed it and waited for your result “45 minutes easily” “1 hour 11 minutes and 46 seconds” “no way that’s a world record” “well we tried” the five of you stood telling people to subscribe before ending the recording and making your way back to the car

the car ride back felt a lot longer than the way there. you were all exhausted

“how’s your ankle” “it’s not too bad it’ll probably hurt more tomorrow morning”

“I'm still not over Tommy trying to kill me and tubbo” “I didn’t try to kill you” “sure” the rest of the journey was chaos you all screamed along to the songs on the radio eventually you all got to McDonald's and spent the rest of the night enjoying each other’s company.

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@l0ver0fj0y @c1loudee

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depressedhatakekakashi · 3 years

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Kakashi Week Day 1- Jutsu Creation

Pairing: Kakagai

Words: 1927

AO3

@kakashiweek

No longer having Obito’s Sharingan was a loss. A disadvantage that left Kakashi more vulnerable. Unable to fight as well as he had during the fourth great shinobi war, and incapable of being made the new Hokage of Konoha.

That’s just a few of the rumours that Kakashi had heard whispered around the village since his appointment as Hokage. Judgements that had been a part of his life since his father had been shunned when he was a child. Forever growing and changing as the years went by.

Except for this time, there was no truth to the rumours.

The things being said about him were factually wrong, and the only people who believed them and passed them onto the next person were civilians. Those who had no real idea how chakra worked. Who didn’t know what a strain on his chakra reserves the Sharingan had been?

They would know better of course if they saw Kakashi in action. If they just happened to pass by the training field near the Hokage’s residence at moments like this. When Kakashi was in the midst of his daily training, his Anbu guards were hidden away in the tree lines watching over him as always.

Just five minutes of watching Kakashi would tell them everything they needed to know about just how the loss of Obito’s Sharingan had affected him. How much more he could do without the Sharingan constantly eating away at his chakra reserves, even when he wasn’t using it.

Then of course, if too many people were watching he wouldn’t be able to train with the same intensity. Creating a new Jutsu was always a dangerous activity. Not knowing exactly what it was he would get as a result meant that he could accidentally end up hurting someone who was a little too close when he made his next attempt. Plus Kakashi just wasn’t someone who enjoyed being watched. Anbu operatives he could forget about. It was their job to go unnoticed, even if he could still feel their presence. But civilians didn’t know how to hideaway. They’d stand out in the open gawking and whispering among each other. Disrupting his concentration.

It was better than he was able to focus. He’d be able to get it right faster if he was able to keep working uninterrupted. That was, of course, if he managed to get anywhere at all.

“It’s still not right,” Examining the mud wall that he had produced, Kakashi sighed. The goal was to create something stronger than the standard mud wall Jutsu. Something that would be able to withstand more abuse without breaking down. Yet no matter how he changed the hand signs that he weaved, or how much Chakra he tried to focus into the Jutsu, nothing had changed yet. It was a larger mud wall Jutsu, and the dogs that appeared in his Jutsu specifically were still present, but other than that it was still made of the same weak material. “Maybe if I try it one more time and focus a bit more chakra into it. I’m sure with just a little bit more effort…”

There were at least three more solid attempts left in him before his chakra reserves became dangerously depleted. Not quite putting him in danger of being bedridden with chakra exhaustion, but enough to put him on his ass for the rest of the night and tomorrow if he pushed a little too hard.

“Two more tries,” he decided, turning his attention back to the wall that he had already created. When he brought forth the next one, this one would crumble apart under the strain created when the new one was formed underneath it. He had already seen so many of his attempts crumble away as if they were nothing.

A constant reminder of why he was trying to create this new Jutsu. To build a stronger wall that would hold more strain. One that would keep standing, even if he tried to build another wall under it.

“You look like you’re thinking hard,” Turning his head, Kakashi felt all of the pent-up stress washing out of his body at the sight of that stunning, toothy grin that Gai always had on his face. “Genma said you’ve been training since lunchtime. I think it’s time for a break, don’t you?”

Gemma, the traitor. He was going to have to have a talk with his friend about telling about him Gai.

“Mah, you act as if I’m about to collapse at any moment,” reaching his hands up into the air, he stretched his body up towards the sky and watched as Gai maneuvered his wheelchair over the grassy field towards him. “Speaking of relaxing. You haven’t been-“

“You know me, Rival,” Gai cut him off, his smile only growing when Kakashi narrowed his eyes. “Just because I require a wheelchair to get around now, doesn’t mean there aren’t things that I can still do to challenge myself.”

Of course. He should have known that there would be nothing that could stop Gai from doing what he wanted, even with a broken leg that would never heal again. It only made sense that he would find new ways to challenge himself, and so long as he wasn’t straining his injured leg Kakashi didn’t care to stop him. After all, that was Gai. Never giving up no matter what obstacles he may face in life.

“One more try,” he offered, smiling when Gai levelled him with a doubtful look. “Just one more, I promise. And then we can go grab something to eat. How does that sound?”

The look that Gai gives him in return is a cross between doubtfulness and pride. An interesting combination, but judging by the fact that Gai was locking his wheels into place and relaxing into his chair he could assume that the deal was made.

Which meant he had one more attempt. One final try to make even the slightest amount of progress. To prove to himself that he wasn’t just wasting his time on this endeavour and that a new powerful Jutsu could be created if he just kept at it a bit longer.

Turning to face the wall he had just created, he took a deep breath and began to focus his chakra into his hands and imagined the wall that he wanted to create. One was made out of a stronger mineral. Something that could handle the abuse rained down on it from an attack striking it constantly.

In his mind, it was a beautiful mixture of purple and green. Jagged and sharp to touch and solid.

A Jutsu that could protect his village. That would keep all of his friends safe, no matter what attack it had to hold off. So that he never had to see someone he cared about die again or…

His eyes darted back towards Gai, lingering on his leg for a moment.

A Jutsu to protect his precious people.

“One more try,” he reminded himself, focusing his attention back on the training field and digging his heels into the ground. “You can do this, Kakashi.”

Gai, Naruto, Sakura, Tenzo, Sai, Sasuke. The list of people he wanted to protect was endless, and while some of them could do the job infinitely better than him he still wanted to try. What good would he be as Hokage if he couldn’t even protect his precious people?

The hand signs were easy enough to weave. Already cemented in his memory from the multiple tries he had made before this. In the blink of an eye, he had finished weaving the signs and slammed his hands down against the ground, his eyes glued on the space in front of him as a giant wall rose from the ground to protect him from an imaginary foe.

It was mud. Still, just mud.

“Damn it.”

“It looks stronger than before,” hearing Gai’s voice getting closer to him, Kakashi turned his head to the side and watched as his best friend wheeled up to his side. “Your hard work is paying off, Rival!”

It was amazing how Gai could look at anything and see success. Even with the biggest failures, he could find something to celebrate. The smallest bit of success to focus on, while Kakashi dwelled on the failure.

“It’s just mud,” resting a hand on his hip, he glared at the wall in front of him. “Nothing has changed.”

“Sometimes looking at the bigger picture makes you miss the small victories,” Rolling further ahead, Gai stopped directly in front of the wall and reached out to tap his finger against a small portion of the wall. A spot where, if he focused hard enough, Kakashi could see the smallest glimmer of purple. “It may not be much, but it is an improvement. Don’t you agree?”

Waiting for Gai to lower his hand, Kakashi slowly reached out to touch the wall. Almost not believing what his eyes were seeing, he expected to feel the mud. brittle and flimsy, but effective for a short period. What he felt instead was a solid rock-hard surface. Not jagged, but stronger than mud could ever hope to be. “Since when are you the insightful type?”

“Well, someone has to pick up the slack when you’re too busy being down on yourself,” giving his head a shake, Kakashi dropped his hand back down to his side and turned to face Gai. “Ready to grab something to eat now?”

“That sounds amazing,” He could continue his training in the morning after a nice long rest. For now, he could enjoy some downtime with his best friend. “on one condition.”

“Kakashi…”

“No, hear me out,” Gai would probably think he had lost his mind, but it was worth a shot. “We should have an eating competition.”

Gai’s jaw dropped open. “Did you just-“

“Don’t tell me you’re not up for it,” doing a one hundred eighty-degree turn, Kakashi gave Gai a playful wave. “Come on. I bet I can beat you no problem.”

His teasing was met with a triumphant shout. One that could easily shatter the windows in a building, if they were close enough to one. “I’ll win this challenge Rival, don’t doubt it!” He proclaimed with the same pride and enthusiasm that he always had when it came to their challenges. “And once I do I’ll be ahead of you in points once again!”

“We’ll be tied,” Kakashi corrected him as he started to make his way towards the exit. “You keep forgetting about the Sushi eating competition!”

“This will be a rematch of that then! And I’ll prove to you once and for all that I can beat you in anything!” The sound of Gai’s wheelchair moving behind him brought a smile to Kakashi’s face. One that he could only explain with a single word. Relief.

Relief that he hadn’t had to say goodbye to another friend.

That he didn’t have another name to look at in the memorial stone.

For that, he would gladly have another hundred challenges without complaint.

“I will win,” Gai’s voice called out to him. A blinding smile greeting him when he looked over at his friend. “I can promise you that, Rival.”

“Well, If you do then I’ll just have to spend the whole night working on my Jutsu,” He decided, chuckling when Gai’s eyes went wide. The use of his impossible punishments not going over his head, even when they came from Kakashi’s mouth. “After all, I can’t let you beat me at everything.”

#kakashi week 2021 #Kakashi Week #KakaGai #It can be read as platonic #i didn't write it as romantic in this one #but we know how they are #friendship comes first even when they're dating XD #Jutsu creation #Kakashi Week Day One

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qwanderer · 3 years

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Loki in the Hall of Mirrors

This story is complicated. Not, like, as a plot, not particularly, but philosophically and thematically. It's got that great play of hero against villain that I love about the Loki story in general and that makes it all so divisive and messy. And I love it even more than I did on first watch.

The first time I watched the desert landing scene, I was like, "Wait? What happened to Allspeak?" because the people who live there don't seem to understand him. But on the second watch, I realized it could be a lack of context, rather than a break in translation. These people probably have an even chance of knowing nothing about Norse myth. Like, what if an alien came up to you and said "I am Boogle of Bofgar, I carry a burden"? You would still have questions like "What the hell is a boogle and why are you carrying your shit here?" So the basic dynamic of Allspeak is probably still functioning, and Loki probably understood their questions, but he was still trying to figure out how to answer when he got distracted by the TVA people.

It could even be an innate psychic ability rather than a magical one, as he seems to understand everyone in the TVA, including the man who can't be fluent in all languages like the field agents because he has never heard of a fish and the seemingly nonverbal robot. (Which of course makes me want Loki talking with Dum-E and the other shop bots! But I digress.)

Okay. I want to start talking about the next-level manipulation shit the TVA are pulling on Loki here. Time, as they say, moves differently in the TVA, and one might even assume that they can avoid having to deal with more variants at once than they can handle. And yet we see them dealing with exactly two other troublemakers during Loki's onboarding.

The first, I'm going to call little echo man.

Little echo man is incredibly annoying to Loki, because he does and says everything Loki might find himself inclined to do and say if he wanted to be difficult. Little echo man does these things in little annoying undignified ways, making them look silly and petulant. Little echo man protests and questions and pushes back, in his business suit and his long dark hair and pale skin, and clearly thinks everyone should treat him as important even though every indication is that he is an annoyance and an afterthought.

Perhaps he's a plant, and perhaps he's just a variant of an annoying but predictable regular they see who they lined up at the same time on purpose. But he is on purpose. Everything he does screams directly at Loki, "Don't do this."

We'll get to the second convenient intersection later.

The most obvious layer of manipulation is simply the beraucracy. They put him up against a series of obstacles which he needs to deal with to get anywhere else, and nothing he does can get him past those obstacles except compliance. All of these obstacles have personality, but they are not personable. They treat Loki like a bag of trash they have been tasked with taking to the curb. Annoying, distasteful, but ultimately routine. His silver tongue isn't going to get him anywhere because these people simply don't care.

I think a lot of these he just goes along with to see where it gets him, since at this point he still believes he has his magic in reserve. But the fact that he steps through the robot fryer even though he thinks he might be a robot without knowing (as others have pointed out, he spent thousands of years as a frost giant without knowing it, and he's recently spent time in the control of the being who shaped Nebula) is a testament to how deep they've already got their hooks in him.

They treat the robot fryer like it's routine, but come the next obstacle, they kill little echo man like it's routine, too. Because he didn't comply.

Loki is slowly being ironed flat to thread into their compliance mill.

And then - I love this, because it reminds me of one of my favorites among the multiplicity of Lokis, GoS!Loki - they put this line in as punctuation between the impersonal, compliance, don't phase of their manipulation and everything that comes after it.

When he's set before the judge, someone actually paying some attention to him, this is his chance to use his silver tongue on someone who will listen. But, although the judge listens, she treats him the same as all the other obstacles have - like listening is a distasteful chore she would like to be done with.

So it seems like the perfect moment for a dramatic escape. Except his magic is gone.

"It's not your story," the judge says. "It never was."

That hammers in all the worst things Loki has ever believed about himself - that he stands in the shadows of others, that he will never have the central place he was raised to desire, that he is, and always will be, a villain to be vanquished rather than a person with choices and agency.

Enter Mobius.

Mobius is a big echo.

He draws all the attention in a room. He is everything that Loki wishes to be - he is powerful, informed, prepared, in control. Capable of charming the judge. And most importantly, he is actively interested in Loki.

At this point in Loki's journey - both in the show and in his life - that has to be irresistible.

So Mobius is in a perfect position to wrap Loki right around his pinky finger.

He listens to Loki without shutting him down, the way all the obstacles have. When Loki tells Mobius he's going to burn down the TVA, Mobius suggests a couple of places he might want to start. One concrete, small, mischievous. One an indication that he's open to Loki doing larger, more significant things here in the future.

He shows Loki his own past and future - but carefully edited, to paint a particular picture.

So many echoes, so many reflections - Loki is in a house of mirrors. Lost, disoriented. Distorted one way, then the other. Magnified and examined.

Loki snarks, and Mobius comments, "Makes you sound smart." Affirms Loki for that little mischievous bit of personality.

Mobius shows Loki some of the most terrible things he's done, and questions them. Pushes Loki away from them. Then changes direction before he can get too heavy-handed, to basically fangirl over the DB Cooper adventure. That's mischief. That's good. I like that.

Punishes him for a small infraction, just to remind him who is in control and that even looking threatening could be seen as a problem.

I think it was at about this point that I got hard reminded of the dynamics of the show White Collar. It's a buddy cop show on a basic level and sometimes the relationship can be very sweet, but sometimes Peter spends one too many times reminding Neal that he can send him back to prison any time he wants and the power dynamic shows its messed up edges.

Mobius is part of the machine, and the machine is doing terrible things to Loki, but I have at least a sliver of hope that the relationship could gain more balance - more genuine balance, not based on the faux freedom that Loki has gained by the end of the episode. There's something to be said for making changes to a system from within that system, but for that to be meaningful change, Mobius would have to change as a person.

Anyway, this current nastily powerful Mobius pushes Loki as hard as he can, and then is conveniently interrupted by the actions of another variant, leaving Loki alone with his remote.

It could easily have been on purpose. The only thing Loki learns by escaping that room is that the TVA is more powerful than any force in the universe, in his experience.

Let's talk about the other Loki variant for a minute. It took me until the second viewing to realize the symbolism of leaving a small child the only survivor in a place of worship, then giving her something to turn her blue.

Odin said he found Loki in a temple, in the aftermath of a battle.

It's actually frighteningly easy to imagine how a distraught Loki could get to a place where he feels the need to genuinely burn down the TVA, and kill every agent in it. Because the TVA put certain clips in his little future show, focusing on the death of his mother, the way his own actions affected it, and the futility and brutality of his own death at the hands of Thanos.

They don't show him the destruction of Asgard, his own role in helping save the evacuees, and the way Thanos decimated the population of that transport before it could even reach Earth. They don't show him the devastation of his home or his capacity to do good.

A Loki who knows that the power of the TVA exists and that he has the capacity to be Asgard's heroic savior would do anything to get that power and save his people.

But we haven't met that Loki yet. I'm sure we will, and it's going to be exhilarating.

This Loki is being taught the importance of control over little things, and so when he gets his collar off and onto that guard, he toys with her, just to see that he can. They have been toying with him and it's oh so satisfying to turn the tables. But it's still compliance in its own way, the petty little mischief that Mobius has been steering him towards.

Loki has been given just enough freedom, just enough choices, that it seems like his own choice to watch the rest of the slide show and come to the obvious conclusion - there's no "out" to go to. His life has gone on without him, and ended. And there's really no point in his trying to fix it. No putting things back the way they were.

So he admits to Mobius - the person who has listened hardest, probably, besides his mother - he admits that he is small and scared and lashing out. That he doesn't know what to do.

Of course, this is when Mobius introduces the task the TVA has for Loki - to take down his other self.

Oh, I can't wait for the next episode! I want to know where this is going.

(I've popped in some panels from Loki: Agent of Asgard because it's my favorite and the show is giving me feelings about it.)

#the loki show #the loki series #agent mobius #loki #loki meta #spoilers #loki spoilers #loki show spoilers #aoa #gos!loki #marvel

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popculturebuffet · 3 years

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Amphibia Weekly Reviews: New Wartwood and Friend or Frobo?

Hello all you happy people! And welcome back to another week’s worth of Amphibia reviews! And we got two standout episodes today as Marcy tries to home improvement her way into people’s hearts, and Polly makes friends with a destructive but endearing robot. Find out what I thought about in full under the cut!

New Wartwood: Marcy episode! Wu-hoo! And true to the show’s current status quo, and I do love how it evolves, it’s her first day in Wartwood and she’s pumped. And true to the awkward, probably autistic like yours truly, nerd we’re dealing with.. she does not make a great impression or intergrate herself to the naturally suspcious of outsiders tow. So when questioned by Anne how her day went she gets into how the town’s carefully built on a swamp.. and how the townsfolk hate her, complete with Angry Mob. Anne disperses it but it’s still the funniest moment of the episode to me, both in how a small one sprouted up so quick.. and how polly’s there despite LIKING Marcy (”I go where the mob goes anne!”). ALso i’d be remiss if I didn’t mention Anne just.. casually blushing while talking to Marcy. There’s no catalyist or any reason she would for any other reason than being sweet on her.

So Marcy, after fixing a statue she knocked over, decides she can earn their love faster as she dosen’t want to wait. This does get to one of Marcy’s core issues.. while she has many, like any of us, it ties back to the fact she has trouble getting this isn’t a video game. I mean she does get the diffrence between real life and a game on an objective level, but she can’t get real life dosen’t WORK like fiction, something i’ve also struggled with and can massively relate to. So she assumes helping them, via fixing up the town a bit, will make them like her. It makes them warm up a little but they still don’t.

So naturally, who should come in by blimp to give her a tempting offer that will end badly but Mayor Toadstool! He also has a blimp now but it keeps escaping... I think I know where it went.

So THAT’S how he can afford those things. Naturally seeing how nice Marcy made things he has a plan to exploit the hell out of her gifts with masonry to pretty up the town as a tourist attraction to make him more money. Anne talks her out of it.. but she ends up caving in the middle of the night. I also love the touch of her staying in the Fwagon, not forgetting the plantars bought it and finding a practical use for it in and out of story now i’ts no longer needed. I also love the little signs she has on it.

The next morning the town awakes to marble pillars in front of all of the shops to make them look fancy and Marcy and the Mayor promoting the town’s new effort,s including a golden founderss tatue and a horrifying golden clock of toadstool, with Anne warry of her girlfriend’s antics. Mostly becaue you can’t force people to like you or bribe them to. Otherwise you cause the entire town to sink into the water bellow... like now. But while Marcy is now convinced the town will never accept her she still dosen’t want them all to die, and summons Joe Sparrow.. who continues to be the best thing ever added to this cast I swear to god as he helps her save the day, removing the various new things to reduce weight, saving some villiagers from a pillar (as Croaker points out their frogs ending up in the water isn’t that deadly), and getting rid of the gold monstrosities.

So the end result is that the town is rightfully liviid, though she does genuinely appologize.. and suprisingly.. TOADSTOOL actually tries to take all the blame. The town rightfully dosen’t let him, but it’s clear he’s somehow growing as a person. Even if anne’s assement of him as “What would happen if the Monopoly Man had a Baby with a PIece of Fried Chicken” is still 100% accurate. They do agree they’ll like her with time, just like Anne, and if supscious, will gladly give her another shot. So Marcy’s learned her lesson.. always listen to your girlfriend. And while she literally fixes her damage.. the mascot toadstool hired explodes as it’s full of bugs.

Final Thoughts on New Wartwood: This was a fun episode. A fairly simple and predictable one, but sometimes that works perfectly and this one was just damn funny, charming and full of good character stuff. Top notch.

Friend or Frobo?:

I have a confession to make: I fricking love robots. It’s something that really HASN’T come up before, but I love a good robot. There’s just tons of good stories to be had with artifical beings, their struggles to be recongized for who they are, their cool powers, their awkward but endearing attempts to fit in with us less than deserving humans. And ficton’s had TONS and TONS of awesome ones: The Vision (in both 616 and MCU flavors), who is one of my faviorite heroes period, Red Tornado, Jenny Wakeman, Shard the Metal Sonic, BOYD, Aya, Data, Crow, Tom Servo, Gypsy, Growler, Robo, Grimlock. the list really DOES go on into infinity for me.

WEirdly though I didn’t pay much mind to Frobo before this episode.. but with no real personality other than endearlingly running into the same obstacle for hours, and no real background yet, I didn’t really have anything to attach to other than “Cool anne’s either going to nearly get killed by a robot or get one”. But this episode changed that using the oldest trick in the book: having a child befriend it. We’ve seen it before with Sentinels, Badniks, Autobots and Iron Giants. Now we get it again with largeish frog robot. And it is pretty damn good.

This is a Polly episode. It’s Hop Pop’s faviorite day: Seed Store Day! Naturally Marcy has come along and naturlaly she’s just as geeked out about seeds as he is because she’s precious and I must protect her from the horrible trauma her trusted father figure is about to inflict on her. Polly naturally wants to get into some shenanigans but suprisingly.. Anne and Sprig don’t wanna anymore. THey’ve learned their lesson and decide to just play video games. So polly does the resonable thing.. and blames them for some shenanigans on her part and goes out to get into more shneanigans only to find it’s lonely without a friend.

Enter Frobo, named that because he looks like a frog and she heard the term robo from anne’s game. And despite very limited programming... Frobo is VERY loveable. As Polly notes he’s essentially a baby: he starts by mimicing her, including his horrifying but endearing laugh, and even doing her spin dash she gained a few episodes back I didn’t mention because I forgot. That one’s on me. Sprig also did the Yooka Laylee thing on top of her spin dash then so there’s that.

Point is it’s all fun, games and heartwarming bonding till Frobo accidently floods the city and gets mobbed and one of the mobbs makes the terrible mistake of accidently kicking polly.

He goes into Red Eye Iron Giant HOmage mode and starts fighting everybody.. including Anne and Sprig who show up to contain things, but eventually Polly wins everyone over with a heartwarming speech as she stops him, pointing out it was her fault and while he is weird, he’s just an innocent> The town.. decides why not. As the mayor points out “We already have two freaks what’s a third”. And given Marcy nearly killed them all yesterday and they begrudginly acepted her and anne did it WAY more than once and they see her as one of them, yeah they give up.

Naturally once they get back Marcy is an easy sell. Now she can do chrono trigger cosplay! Hop Pop is a bit till it’s shown that frobo can farm super fast, and he’s part of the family now. Sprig and Anne shrug off him having come from the factory, and this surely won’t backfire on them surely.

Final Thoughts on Friend or Frobo:

This one was excellent. The idea of Polly having to learn repsonsiblity was a nice idea, and Frobo is as I said endearing: he’s simply an innocent being who knows nothing and is slowly learning and his friendship with polly is really fucking cute. And giving him an emotional attachment to the plantars means whatevers going on with him gets higher stakes.. and given how robots are treated in fiction i’m just counting the minutes till he tragically gets blowed up real good. But until then this episode was a standout for the season. While as I made clear the “Kid befriends death machine” trope is not NEW, the baby concept made it feel fresh. It also as usual had some good jokes.

So all in all a top notch week, really great stuff and i’ts only going to get better next time!

Nexttime: Mayor Toadstool is tempted to leave. Kay. But more importantly MADDIE EPISODE AGAIN BITCHES. AND IT HAS MARCY IT. I’M READY.

Next On This Blog: Final Space Yo! Quinn and Gary visit earth and Tribore leaves.. again. Be here or be... elsewhere I guess

If you liked this review, follow for more, join my patreon, and comission your own review if you want via my askbox, discord and dms. See you at the next rainbow.

#amphibia #annarcy #anne boonchuy #marcy wu #frobo #polly plantar #hopidiah plantar #sprig plantar #mayor toadstool

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zaph1337 · 3 years

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Monster Hunter Rating 30: Fatalis, the Dark Demise

The world of Monster Hunter is a dangerous one. Monsters with powers unlike any animal we know run rampant, and some of them are so powerful as to be compared to natural disasters, or maybe even gods. These “Elder Dragons” are viewed as forces of nature given body and mind, and wherever they are, they’re almost always at the top of the food chain. But it begs the question: what is the strongest Elder Dragon of them all?

Some would say that Lao-Shan Lung, the Old Mountain Dragon, holds that honor. After all, it will destroy entire mountains if they stand in its path, and every hunt with one is a race against time to prevent the monster from reaching and destroying the fortresses that separate it from the settlements it would crush beneath its feet as it wanders. But why does Lao-Shan Lung wander? Why does it never go around the obstacles in its way? Why will it never fight back against the hunters that pose a serious threat of killing it? The answer is one that no one wants to accept: Lao-Shan Lung, what may be the living incarnation of an avalanche or some other seismic force, is not wandering. It’s running for its life. Elder Dragons may be the embodiments of natural phenomena, and though we may not like it, death is just as natural as landslides and lightning. We’ve come a long way, but it’s finally time to talk about the final boss of the first Monster Hunter game: the Black Dragon, Fatalis!

(How it appears in Monster Hunter 1)

(How it appears in Monster Hunter World: Iceborne)

Appearance: If the wiki had a third render of Fatalis that I liked, I would’ve put it up there. Anyways, Fatalis looks just like an archetypal European dragon; four legs, two wings, horned head, and a long tail. It looks pretty generic, but there are a few things that help it stand out. First off, it’s huge, being 4110.6 cm (134.9 ft) long in every main series game it appears in except for MHW:I, where it’s 4137.17 cm (135.7 ft) long. That’s 30+ ft more than Diablos or Gravios, and if you wanna see how big Fatalis is compared to a person, well...here’s an image from MHW:I:

Yyyeeah, it’s big. Something else that’s interesting is the fact that Fatalis has eyes which are literally made of crystal, which is why they look shiny in the above image. They still look a lot like traditional dragon eyes, though. In fact, basically all of its design elements are things that you’d expect to find on European dragons, which makes Fatalis look rather generic. You’d think that even in the first game, the devs would be more creative with their final boss considering the other dragons in the game, but that’s just it: Fatalis stands out when compared to a lot of the other dragons in Monster Hunter because it looks just like a European dragon and not much more. This makes it feel like it’s not just a dragon, it’s the dragon. When you hear stories of dragons wreaking mass destruction, you’ll likely imagine something that looks just like Fatalis, and I believe that that’s exactly what the developers of MH intended when they made it. It’s kinda genius, in that way, and combined with the overwhelming presence Fatalis has thanks to its size, I feel like I have to give it an 8/10.

Behavior/Lore: Since I like to cover the lore of a monster in this category anyways, I thought I might as well change its name to reflect that. Anyways, people don’t know a lot about Fatalis, such as how many there are, where there ideal habitat is, their mating rituals, stuff like that. The reason why we don’t know a lot about Fatalis is that it kills literally everything it sees, which tells us a lot on its own. Fatalis doesn’t always eat what it kills; it just kills for the sake of it, and since literally everything that breathes seems to be on its sh*t list, this has led to the conclusion that Fatalis hates all livings things on the grounds that they exist.

As I alluded to in the introduction, the natural phenomenon that Fatalis likely embodies is death itself. All other monsters are terrified of it, and, as seen with Lao-Shan Lung, will go to great lengths to stay as far from it as possible. How strong do you have to be to make a monster that bulldozes mountains run for mommy? Well, let me put it this way: Fatalis obliterated Schrade Kingdom in a single night, and now uses the ruins of the castle as its den; the very sky above the kingdom’s remains is a perpetual bloody red, with a miasma of purple clouds that hover over the fallen settlement. And that’s just what we know is true; according to legend, Fatalis could scorch all the world’s lands in a matter of days, causing the end of life itself. Obviously, this can’t be proven, nor do I know if they’re talking about one Fatalis or all of them (however many there are), but when legends like that are circulating, it’s a wonder that people aren’t living in constant fear that this thing will decide to visit their settlement one day and kill everyone. Well, not so much a wonder as it is a conspiracy; the Hunter’s Guild, fearing that the fear of Fatalis’ capabilities could lead to an outbreak of panic and anarchy, has done its best to relegate Fatalis and all stories related to it to the realm of fantasy. Only hunters who the Guild believes are skilled enough to possibly repel or kill Fatalis are allowed to know that it exists, and even then, when the Guild sends them on secret missions to fight it, they almost never come back.

Though Fatalis leaves few witnesses to its attacks, there are some who provide valuable information about the dragon’s habits. After Fatalis kills a hunter, it melts said hunter and their equipment down, then applies the remains to its body to armor its hide, making it even harder to kill. Now, some say that this is an instinctual behavior, like how the monster Nerscylla wears the hides of its prey for the same purpose, but Fatalis is only known to do this to humans, which wouldn’t make sense because killing monsters would give it more material to cover itself in. This has led some to believe that Fatalis knows that hunters make armor from the remains of the monsters they kill, so it makes armor out of them to mock them in death. If this is true, then not only is Fatalis smart enough to have a concept of irony, it harbors a special kind of hatred for humans in particular, and it presumably enjoys killing them. These things make Fatalis even more terrifying and dangerous than previously thought, and put its attack on Schrade Kingdom and its occupancy of Schrade Castle in a new light.

Speaking of equipment, the few times anyone has actually killed a Fatalis and made weapons and armor from its parts, they’ve almost always regretted it. Those that wear Fatalis armor have been victims of disturbing phenomena; horrible nightmares and periods of unnatural, unwanted strength are a common occurrence, and some have reported feeling as though something is possessing them and forcing their legs to move against their will. In extreme cases, hunters who have been knocked unconscious while wearing the armor report feeling that something was controlling their bodies before they awoke. But those people are the lucky ones; hunters who wear Fatalis armor for extensive periods of time often disappear without a trace, or even die for no apparent reason.

Not even the weapons are safe. Some cause the wielders to hear phantom screams, others induce feelings of gnawing despair or paranoia, and some are even said to corrupt the wielder’s soul, turning them into a force of bloodshed and chaos as Fatalis was...or is. In Monster Hunter Generations, a cave in Pokke Village contains a giant version of a Black Blade, a Great Sword made of Fatalis parts, which can be mined for Fatalis materials. It’s been noted that the damage done to the blade by mining it will regenerate in a matter of days; when you combine that with the symptoms of using Fatalis equipment, it gives credence to the possibility that Fatalis lives on through said equipment, controlling the bodies and minds of those that slew its corporeal form. Whether this is true or not is irrelevant; the fact remains that Fatalis equipment has a deleterious effect on those that use it, and as such, it’s recommended that none should attempt to utilize anything made from Fatalis’ remains at all.

If you thought that Fatalis as a life-form was fundamentally wrong before, then I have one last bit of absurdity for you: the one time anyone ever found a Fatalis egg, the newborn that hatched from it grew to its adult form in literal hours, and presumably hated everything that breathes from birth. Other than that, we don’t know anything about its life cycle or parental habits, and the wiki doesn’t say what happened after the baby reached maturity, but we can reasonably assume that it was a bloody event.

I’ve never been more enthralled by a monster’s lore than I have been reading about Fatalis. The developers really went out of their way to impress upon players just how unnatural and evil Fatalis is, and the result is the monster to end all monsters. I think my favorite parts are the fact that the Guild covers up Fatalis’ existence to prevent society from collapsing and how even its equipment is too dangerous to be around. And even with this, there’s still so much we don’t know about Fatalis, which makes it even more intriguing. With how much I’ve been thinking about all this the past few days, I feel like I have to give this category a 10/10.

Abilities: Obviously, Fatalis is one of the strongest monsters in the series. Its body is very durable due to its habit of melting down hunters to use as armor, and even the membranes of its wings are has hard as metal. It can both fly and charge at high speeds, with the latter doing massive damage thanks to Fatalis’ raw strength. However, its most famous ability--and its deadliest--is its fire breath, which is equal in power to some other Elder Dragons. The streams of fire that escape from Fatalis’ maw are even bigger than the dragon itself, and can be so powerful that they one-shot hunters caught in them. Fatalis can also spread a cloud of reactive powder around it; igniting this powder causes a devastating explosion.

Now, conceptually, these attributes and attacks aren’t too crazy, but there’s one more thing I want to mention: In Monster Hunter 1, you fight Fatalis in 4 quests (assuming that the wiki’s quest list for the game has all of them), and in all of those quests, the goal is “damage Fatalis as much as you can to drive him away,” not “slay Fatalis.” This means that Fatalis is so much more powerful than anything else in the game, the Guild does not believe you are capable of killing it. Despite all of your accomplishments up to that point, the Guild still doesn’t think you have what it takes to kill the darn thing. Now, considering the goal doesn’t say “slay or repel” or anything like that, I was under the impression that you couldn’t kill Fatalis in the first Monster Hunter, but a video on the wiki shows that you can, so I guess the devs phrased it that way to make you feel even cooler for achieving what even the game thought was impossible. It’s a nice touch. Anyways, Fatalis’ abilities may not sound like anything special for a dragon, but the sheer power behind its attacks, as well as how much work you have to put in to damage it in any meaningful way, gets it an 8/10.

Equipment: Since most, if not all of Fatalis’ equipment is inherently evil, I’ll mention if the descriptions say exactly what they do to the user. Let’s start ourselves off with a Hunting Horn called the Black Lute:

According to its description in MHFU, “[a]nyone who hears this Horn feels faint.” Kinda counterproductive, considering the Hunting Horn’s whole gimmick is that it buffs you and your allies with magical songs. Its upgraded form, the Fatalis Menace, isn’t much better, as “its song causes listeners to turn into disheartened beasts.” So already we see the dangers involved in using this weapon, but the description is lore that doesn’t impact gameplay, so strum to your heart’s content! As for how the Lute looks, I like the use of Fatalis horns as the majority of the main body, and the little red gem is a nice touch. Next up, something a little less evil, actually! The Dual Blades called Double Dragon require both Fatalis and Lao-Shan Lung parts, which I guess makes them okay to use?

I say that these aren’t evil because their description just says “[t]he Dragon element infused in these Dual Blades hits enemies from both sides.” Though, you do have to make them by upgrading the Fatalis Sword and Shield called the Black Sword, and according to its description, “[t]he void it creates envelopes all in its path[,]” which makes me think that these are probably still unsafe to use. Though I do like how the blades are different shapes and sizes to match up with the dragons they came from. But you know me, if a monster has a weird or goofy weapon, I gotta show it off, and Fatalis isn’t exempt from this. So here’s the Light Bowgun called the Black Parasol:

I was gonna make a JFK joke, ‘cause one of the theories surrounding his assassination was that someone used a gun disguised as an umbrella to shoot him from the side, but I don’t think I can make a joke like that without being tasteless, especially since this weapon apparently has “an assassin's thirst for death.” But here’s some tasty lore for you: the Black Parasol’s upgrade in the Japan-only MH4U, the Dark Parasol, was “designed behind the scenes by the Guild for assassination purposes.” This may be a translation of the Japanese description, so “assassination” might just mean “kill,” but it makes you think about how weird it is to call hunting a monster an assassination; there’s a chance that the Black Parasol was made by the Guild specifically to kill people, and that just raises more questions. As for the Parasol’s design, it’s so out of left field that I can’t help but find it amusing. The doily-like trim combined with the swirly handle makes it impossible to take seriously, which was probably the point.

Now, here’s where things get a bit messy; the wiki doesn’t have very many pictures of Fatalis armor. The ones it does have are small, not the standard Fatalis armor, or don’t have an image of the male armor to go with them. So, I have to resort to using the small images of the “S” armor from MHFU. I’ve made them bigger to avoid straining anyone’s eyes, but they’re all blurry now, so I apologize if I miss any details you think are important. Here’s the Blademaster armor:

Oh, my God, they gave the women’s set a helmet! Aaaannd it’s for the armor set with low-quali renders online. Yaaaay. Okay, that aside, this does look awesome. It definitely looks like armor that would make you evil if you wore it, and the curved horns on the helmet really add to that theme, as do the spikes on the arms and legs. As for the Gunner armor:

It looks really cool, too! Seems that the wings are attached to the arms in lieu of arm guards, like the ones you see on other Gunner sets. The horns on this set are pointed up this time, presumably for reasons related to peripheral vision or something like that, which is helpful for someone using a gun. The boots on the armor look like dragon feet, and combined with the wings and other design aspects, makes this armor feel like the one that’s most likely going to let Fatalis’ soul overtake you.

Overall, the equipment does what it was made to do: look powerful, yet evil at the same time. It seems like something that fanfic authors would make use of for their worldbuilding--something like how the greatest hunter in the land went missing after killing Fatalis and making equipment from it, only for horror stories of a black knight wielding cursed armaments wiping small settlements off the map and slaughtering travelers. This is the first time that equipment lore factors into the scoring for this category, and I might have to look at the descriptions of the equipment I choose in future reviews to see if that affects my opinion on it any. For now, Fatalis’ equipment gets an 8/10.

Final Thoughts and Tally: The creators of Monster Hunter wanted to make an unforgettable final boss, and they succeeded. The concept of a truly evil, apocalyptic monster in a world where most monsters are basically animals adds to its intimidation factor, and I can only imagine how kids felt when they saw Schrade Castle and the skies above it for the first time. It honestly makes me sad that I never had the original Monster Hunter as a kid, ‘cause the impression Fatalis and the fight with it would have had on me would likely have stuck with me to this day. One thing’s for sure, though: if I ever get a Monster Hunter game besides Rise, it’ll probably be Monster Hunter World and its Iceborne expansion, ‘cause aside from the Coral Islands, fighting Fatalis in a modern game would be exhilarating. 8/10.

#monster hunter #monster hunter rating #zaph1337

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thenervousmedic · 3 years

Text

I had a minecraft dream last night...

This is going to be a long post, but bear eith me, and take the time to read it.

I don't dream about minecraft very often. In fact this might be a first. I'm still in bed while writing this, as im afraid if I wait I'll lose a bunch of the memories.

It involved myself and a few members of the Dream SMP getting sucked into MC. Ironic, I know. Dream, George, Badboyhalo, Tecnoblade, Wilbur Soot, Tommyinnit, and myself. We all looked like our avatars... mostly, and even had some special skills i'll get into later.

To be clear, they were as they are in real life in terms of personality.

I've not watched the dream smp yet... maybe I should start soon. Anyway, side tracked...

The world worked differently than normal MC. It was more realistic, especially the combat and movement. Anything you can do irl you can do here. The drawback was that it made everything harder and more exhausting.

I was dragged in a month before the others, where over the next four weeks, I'd figure out how the lives system works; how difficult movement was; that crafting was nearly the same as normal mc; and how to build.

Five lives. There was a little tracker on the back of your hand, five squares for five lives. Each life you lost, a square would disappear. But it wasnt that simple. Every tine you died you'd feel the affects of the world more. Eating took longer, everything cost more and more realistic amounts of effort, and most importantly... taking damage would actually hurt.

On your first life damage was less of a danger and more of a 'stat' to just be aware of. Getting attacked, shot, exploded next to, ect wasn't too bad. But the more you died the more these things started to get scary. Arrows would tear their way in and ve painful to remove. You'd bleed and have actual wounds that needed care.

By the time the smp members were spawning in, I'd already been reduced to my last life. I was never good at minecraft, though im alright irl with a bow it didnt help much.

You spawn in unconcious. I'd lost my first life that way. I spawned above water. A painless drowning. I hadn't gone back to the ocean since, it scared the fuck out of me.

The first to arrive was Techno. I went back to spawn for the good sheep spawns there. Found him asleep in the grass. He was lucky no creepers had spawned.

Nearly everyone was bigger than me, I'm pretty small, so hauling this guys limp piglin ass all the way to my little safety shack was really hard.

Then Dream and George one after another. Badboy. Tommy... and finally Wilbur.

Wilbur was... a special case. He was a ghost. Just like his ghostbur skin had been. Fully awake, really freaking out. I was near collapsing from taking everyone else to my home, wasnt really much of a comfort, but I at least managed to convince him to come with me after the sun started to dip.

When we got back Wilbur helped me make beds. Couldn't have everyone sleeping propped up against the walls... Wilbur couldn't grab anything, but he could open and close chests. He also found out he could manafest things like his guitar, and a plushie orca. Things that made him a little less anxious. It was nice to hear music again.

I didnt get to talk to him long. We finished the beds, put everyone on one, then I immediatly konked the fuck out over the crafting table.

By the time I woke up, everyone was already awake and talking. The typical suspects. Why are we here, how, what happened, is this even real. You get the picture. I guess usually social anxiety, especially in the presence of people I admire so much, would've been a big stressor but after a month alone in this world I damn near started bawling at the thought of someone else even existing.

I told them all I know. We are stuck here, we have lives, dont fucking lose them it makes the game harder. The physics are just as janky as regular minecraft, mobs are much more articulated, armour actually has weight and at this point I wasnt aware of the little buffs everyone had to a particular skill.

Dream was incredibly good at exploiting the game's wonky system and parkouring, even of he couldnt nessesarily do it irl.

Techno was suddenly extremely knowledgeable about combat and could handle most weapons effectively. He was also a piglin-type guy which made him immune to fire.

George's coding skills translated directly into redstone knowledge, letting him build ridiculous machines with enough respources.

Tommy had incredible luck with loot and generally got good enchants.

And Bad was, thanks to his skin, some form of demonic entity and would be completely ignored by most hostile mobs.

Wilbur, as you know, was a ghost who could phase through anything and summon ghostly items.

We didn't find out everyone's special trait immediatly, of course. It happened over many days of trail and error trying to collect resources, build, and have fun.

Turns out my skill was useless by myself, hence why I never found it before they arrived. Anything I gave to another person was twice as effective. Healing items helped more, food would fill them on smaller portions, armour would get a free temporary enchant depending on what they needed.

I'd never liked playing minecraft alone.

I'm losing some of the dream, I shoukd wtite some bullet points down or this post will be miles long.

Tommy accidently befriended a wolf, he named it Wilbur to mess with Wilbur. We had two Wilburs.

Bad was constantly driven up the wall by peoples language but truly was using it as a coping mechanism early on because he was afraid of being stuck here forever. We made sure to swear occasionally so he'd get the oportunity to yell at us.

Techno lost his first life when a creeper blast threw him directly into Dream's sword.

Dream never got over it.

Wilbur started making more songs and even made a few targetted at the groups adventures.

Wilbur descovered if he goes into the floor he cant tell which was is up, this terrified him, he never went underground again.

George made automatic farms and eventually even non-minecraft typical things like a morning alarm clock, a compass that pointed to the nearest village, and invented new armour that was more lightweight but still protective.

Wilbur the wolf regularly barked at and mauled giant spiders before they got anywhere near the house, much to literally everyone's relief.

Bad learned how to read and write enchanting table symbols.

I taught Dream how to repair his clothes and in return he showed me how to build traps.

Techno learned he could talk hoglin, piglin, and villager.

Bad learned he could stare at endermen and mistakingly assumed everyone could so he told everyone else its ok to do so.

Tommy lost his first life to an enderman.

Wilbur worked with george for a whole week on special gloves that would let him touch stuff.

I took an arrow dangerously close to the lungs after Tomny's first respawn trying to bring him home.

Dream realised he couldn't take off his mask and wished he could see the world normally again, nobody knew what his vision was like.

Bad descovered a joy for cooking.

Bad also tamed a cat and named it Muffin.

Muffin the cat would ride Wilbur the wolf around.

Dream lost his first life to hunger after pushing himself for too long.

Techno took a wrong step in the neather and lost his second life to a seriously long fall.

I never knew what I looked like...

Tommy lost his second life being overrun by zombies without a weapon. We made a rule to never leave the house alone after this many deaths.

Bad descovered pretty late that milk is poisonous to him and thus cakes will kill him. He lost a life to cake. He was devastated.

Tommy built a cute campfire. He and Wilbur would mess around singing at it. Wolf Wilbur thoroughly enjoyed this.

I would stay up most of the night watching everyone sleep because I worried the house could get invaded or surrounded. They found out after Phantoms started spawning and made a rule that at least one of then would stay awake at night to make me feel better.

George built Dream an obstacle course with lots of moving parts and such. He ran it every morning.

I learned how to play guitar from Wilbur at the campfire.

Torches never burnt out after they arrived. No idea why.

That's all I can remember...

It was a hard dream, I was sad and angry sometimes... but the happy moments made it worth it.

I hope I return to that dream someday.

#dream #badboyhalo #georgenotfound #technoblade #wilbur soot #tommyinnit #minecraft #a dream #long post

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robertreich · 4 years

Video

youtube

The System: Who Rigged It, How We Fix It

The coronavirus has starkly revealed what most of us already knew: The concentration of wealth in America has created a a health care system in which the wealthy can buy care others can't.

It’s also created an education system in which the super-rich can buy admission to college for their children, a political system in which they can buy Congress and the presidency, and a justice system in which they can buy their way out of jail.

Almost everyone else has been hurled into a dystopia of bureaucratic arbitrariness, corporate indifference, and the legal and financial sinkholes that have become hallmarks of modern American life. The system is rigged. But we can fix it. Today, the great divide in American politics isn’t between right and left. The underlying contest is between a small minority who have gained power over the system, and the vast majority who have little or none.

Forget politics as you’ve come to see it -- as contests between Democrats and Republicans. The real divide is between democracy and oligarchy.

The market has been organized to serve the wealthy. Since 1980, the percentage of the nation’s wealth owned by the richest four hundred Americans has quadrupled (from less than 1 percent to 3.5 percent) while the share owned by the entire bottom half of America has dropped to 1.3 percent.

The three wealthiest Americans own as much as the entire bottom half of the population. Big corporations, CEOs, and a handful of extremely rich people have vastly more influence on public policy than the average American. Wealth and power have become one and the same. As the oligarchs tighten their hold over our system, they have lambasted efforts to rein in their greed as “socialism”, which, to them, means getting something for doing nothing.

But “getting something for doing nothing” seems to better describe the handouts being given to large corporations and their CEOs.

General Motors, for example, has received $600 million in federal contracts and $500 million in tax breaks since Donald Trump took office. Much of this “corporate welfare” has gone to executives, including CEO Mary Barra, who raked in almost $22 million in compensation in 2018 alone. GM employees, on the other hand, have faced over 14,000 layoffs and the closing of three assembly plants and two component factories.

And now, in the midst of a pandemic, big corporations are getting $500 billion from taxpayers.

Our system, it turns out, does practice one form of socialism -- socialism for the rich. Everyone else is subject to harsh capitalism.

Socialism for the rich means people at the top are not held accountable. Harsh capitalism for the many, means most Americans are at risk for events over which they have no control, and have no safety nets to catch them if they fall.

Among those who are particularly complicit in rigging the system are the CEOs of America’s corporate behemoths.

Take Jamie Dimon, the CEO of JPMorgan Chase, whose net worth is $1.4 billion. He comes as close as anyone to embodying the American system as it functions today.

Dimon describes himself as “a patriot before I’m the CEO of JPMorgan.” He brags about the corporate philanthropy of his bank, but it’s a drop in the bucket compared to his company’s net income, which in 2018 was $30.7 billion -- roughly one hundred times the size of his company's investment program for America’s poor cities.

Much of JP Morgan’s income gain in 2018 came from savings from the giant Republican tax cut enacted at the end of 2017 -- a tax cut that Dimon intensively lobbied Congress for.

Dimon doesn’t acknowledge the inconsistencies between his self-image as “patriot first” and his role as CEO of America’s largest bank. He doesn’t understand how he has hijacked the system.

Perhaps he should read my new book.

To understand how the system has been hijacked, we must understand how it went from being accountable to all stakeholders -- not just stockholders but also workers, consumers, and citizens in the communities where companies are headquartered and do business -- to intensely shareholder-focused capitalism.

In the post-WWII era, American capitalism assumed that large corporations had responsibilities to all their stakeholders. CEOs of that era saw themselves as “corporate statesmen” responsible for the common good.

But by the 1980s, shareholder capitalism (which focuses on maximizing profits) replaced stakeholder capitalism. That was largely due to the corporate raiders -- ultra-rich investors who hollowed-out once-thriving companies and left workers to fend for themselves.

Billionaire investor Carl Icahn, for example, targeted major companies like Texaco and Nabisco by acquiring enough shares of their stock to force major changes that increased their stock value -- such as suppressing wages, fighting unions, laying off workers, abandoning communities for cheaper labor elsewhere, and taking on debt -- and then selling his shares for a fat profit. In 1985, after winning control of Trans World Airlines, he loaded the airline with more than $500 million in debt, stripped it of its assets, and pocketed nearly $500 million in profits.

As a result of the hostile takeovers mounted by Icahn and other raiders, a wholly different understanding about the purpose of the corporation emerged.

Even the threat of hostile takeovers forced CEOs to fall in line by maximizing shareholder profits over all else. The corporate statesmen of previous decades became the corporate butchers of the 1980s and 1990s, whose nearly exclusive focus was to “cut out the fat” and make their companies “lean and mean.”

As power increased for the wealthy and large corporations at the top, it shifted in exactly the opposite direction for workers. In the mid-1950s, 35 percent of all private-sector workers in the United States were unionized. Today, 6.4 percent of them are.

The wave of hostile takeovers pushed employers to raise profits and share prices by cutting payroll costs and crushing unions, which led to a redistribution of income and wealth from workers to the richest 1 percent. Corporations have fired workers who try to organize and have mounted campaigns against union votes. All the while, corporations have been relocating to states with few labor protections and so-called “right-to-work” laws that weaken workers’ ability to join unions.

Power is a zero-sum game. People gain it only when others lose it. The connection between the economy and power is critical. As power has concentrated in the hands of a few, those few have grabbed nearly all the economic gains for themselves.

The oligarchy has triumphed because no one has paid attention to the system as a whole – to the shifts from stakeholder to shareholder capitalism, from strong unions to giant corporations with few labor protections, and from regulated to unchecked finance.

As power has shifted to large corporations, workers have been left to fend for themselves. Most Americans developed 3 key coping mechanisms to keep afloat.

The first mechanism was women entering the paid workforce. Starting in the late 1970s, women went into paid work in record numbers, in large part to prop up family incomes, as the wages of male workers stagnated or declined.

Then, by the late 1990s, even two incomes wasn’t enough to keep many families above water, causing them to turn to the next coping mechanism: working longer hours. By the mid-2000s a growing number of people took on two or three jobs, often demanding 50 hours or more per week.

Once the second coping mechanism was exhausted, workers turned to their last option: drawing down savings and borrowing to the hilt. The only way Americans could keep consuming was to go deeper into debt. By 2007, household debt had exploded, with the typical American household owing 138 percent of its after-tax income. Home mortgage debt soared as housing values continued to rise. Consumers refinanced their homes with even larger mortgages and used their homes as collateral for additional loans.

This last coping mechanism came to an abrupt end in 2008 when the debt bubbles burst, causing the financial crisis. Only then did Americans begin to realize what had happened to them, and to the system as a whole. That’s when our politics began to turn ugly.

So what do we do about it? The answer is found in politics and rooted in power.

The way to overcome oligarchy is for the rest of us to join together and form a multiracial, multiethnic coalition of working-class, poor and middle-class Americans fighting for democracy.

This agenda is neither “right” nor “left.” It is the bedrock for everything America must do.

The oligarchy understands that a “divide-and-conquer” strategy gives them more room to get what they want without opposition. Lucky for them, Trump is a pro at pitting native-born Americans against immigrants, the working class against the poor, white people against people of color. His goal is cynicism, disruption, and division. Trump and the oligarchy behind him have been able to rig the system and then whip around to complain loudly that the system is rigged.

But history shows that oligarchies cannot hold on to power forever. They are inherently unstable. When a vast majority of people come to view an oligarchy as illegitimate and an obstacle to their wellbeing, oligarchies become vulnerable.

As bad as it looks right now, the great strength of this country is our resilience. We bounce back. We have before. We will again.

In order for real change to occur -- in order to reverse the vicious cycle in which we now find ourselves -- the locus of power in the system will have to change.

The challenge we face is large and complex, but we are well suited for the fight ahead. Together, we will dismantle the oligarchy. Together, we will fix the system.

#video #videos #oligarchy #American oligarchy

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livingmybestfakelife · 4 years

Text

The Favorite -3 of ?-

Tommy Shelby x Black Reader

[Raji Khan, Delhana - 3:17 AM]

There was nothing that anyone could do, there was no warning, no signs of any kind, it was even a miracle that the casualties were so low given the strength of the bomb. The small farming town of Solomon, just twenty miles from Raji Khan was the place to go if you wanted the best produce, in fact it’s where the Delhanan royal family gotten most of their food supply. The small community was almost completely covered in smoke and dust, it was difficult for emergency services to make their way around the area given the obstacles, it was nothing they’ve ever seen before, most of them were some of the younger workers who wasn’t in service long enough to see such a catastrophe.

“Your majesty! Your majesty!”

Abraham was awoken by the cries of his personal guard and head of security, in a normal situation he would knock but tonight it was to be assumed that the country was under attack with the royal family possibly being targets as well, not all of the family members lived in the palace or the two other homes that they owned. Everyone was spread out all over the country, so with this knowledge it was harder to keep track of everyone, who was to say that the Solomon disaster would be the only attack.

“We have to get to the bunker your majesty, I’ll contact with the other guards to make sure that everyone else is safe”

Livingston helped the older man out of his bed and gotten him to safety as quickly as possible, he rushed him into the giant room before closing it, he let him know that he would have to leave him alone for a little while so that he could check out what was going on from the outside, by this time the solders that were guarding the exterior of the palace would be on guard and rushing around, it would be easier to speak to them directly to see where to go from here.

Meanwhile Abraham was silently praying for not only himself but for his family, especially you, at that thought he trudged over to the telephone on the other side of the room in an attempt to get ahold of you. Hopefully the lines wouldn’t be dead or too busy, once the operator gotten in contact with Fairweather Manor the maid on the other end could sense his agitation no matter how hard he tried to mask it, she rushed up the stairs to retrieve you for the urgent phone call.

“Your royal highness, your grandfather is on the phone, he says it’s urgent”

She exclaimed, she also rushed right in without knocking and scared you out of your peaceful slumber, she was as frightened as he was on the other end on the phone, not yet knowing what the fuss was about, you were about to be one of the first people outside of Delhana to hear about the devastating news that happened in your home country.

You were out of breath and had to collect yourself once you arrived downstairs, your grandfather was whispering a prayer in his native tongue and probably didn’t know that you were on the other line, you let him continue and prayed along with him, the maid right across from you was worried about what was going on and you silently calmed her then told her that she could head back to her chambers for the time being.

“Babu...Papa what is the matter?”

“My little lamb, it is just terrible, I know that I am expected to be calm but I am terrified, listen I don’t know what all of the facts are but I suspect that we are under attack”

“What?”

“Livingston wouldn’t have busted into my room without knocking if it was anything but, I’m sure that I am correct in my prediction, and because of that, there is a chance that the family is in danger”

“Papa don’t talk like that”

“My girl I don’t like it anymore than you do, but we must be realistic, we’ve prepped for this, you are the only member out of the country and not under any threat, so that means that there is a chance that you might be one of very few if not the only one that will survive-“

“No papa no”

“Listen to me YN, if there is to be a chance that you’re the only member that is higher up on the line of succession that survives this...then you are to be queen, there is no other way around it, now that doesn’t mean that I am giving up hope, I still have a lot of life left to live, I just want you to be aware of what is going on”

“Mama and Baba, are they still in Fort Messer?”

“Yes, it’s the safest place they can be at the moment, but it doesn’t mean they’re out of the clear just yet”

You want to break down and cry at the thought of your whole family being wiped away and you aren’t even in the same continent as them, you are alone in a country with people you hardly know who wouldn’t understand the pressure you are under right now, your parents are feeling the same way right now, their only child being where she is right now should give them some comfort but they regret not having you close to them, they couldn’t hold you or comfort you, they only had each other and it wasn’t enough.

“I-I should’ve never left”

“We didn’t know this was going to happen my girl, there would be nothing that you could do...”

He pauses for a moment while mentally fighting with himself if he should even tell you what he feels like he should, it wasn’t the time but also the perfect time, he might die after all, right?”

“You were always my favorite, you know that right? I love all of my grandchildren but you...”

“Papa please, you will all make it”

“I don’t have a lot of time darling, listen to me, no one that doesn’t need to know should be aware about this right now, you are to stay calm”

“But the maid-“

“You know what to do my little lamb, we might loose connection at any moment, but know that I love you alright”

“I love you too-“

Just as he called it, right on cue the line went dead, you were grateful that you at least got to say it back before it did, if he were to go, his last words from you would be that you loved him, he would die knowing that he was cherished by the most important person to him.

You hang up the phone while letting out a deep breath that you didn’t know you were holding in, the maid from earlier came back over to the little room to check on you, she heard your muffled voice but couldn’t make out what you were saying.

“Your highness, is everything alright?”

“Oh, yes, my grandfather can be very superstitious, he claimed to have had a dream that I was kidnapped by spies working for the Russians”

You chuckle to add onto the lie, she laughs along with you and looked to be convinced

“My grandad is the same way ma’am they get to be that way at that age”

“I agree, I appreciate your concern though, I’ll be going back to my room”

“Yes ma’am”

She curtsied and walked back to the servants quaters immediately. You look around the area to make sure that no one else heard your conversation, it would take a while before the news would break of what happened with the bomb, so you would keep quiet until everyone here would find out, it would also be the only way to find out if your grandfather and everyone survived the chaos, it wasn’t how you wanted to know but you had no other way to get in touch with anyone in Delhana.

Once you gotten back to your room you looked at yourself in the mirror and noticed that you weren’t wearing a robe and was downstairs in your sleeping gown, it was a miracle that no one else in the house besides the one maid saw you in your most vulnerable state, you wouldn’t get much sleep for the rest of the early hours, all you had on your mind was your family, in an attempt to get a little more comfortable you turn onto your side and look at the bust of The Favorite, she was glossy even in the soft moonlight that was illuminating through the window, you had completely forgotten about the lost piece of art and it made you even more upset at the fact that it was indeed stolen by the past owner of this house, but you had plans for her, for if the unfortunate were to happen, for if you were to become queen, you would get your countries property back.

Tags: @maryams-things

#tommy shelby #tommy shelby imagine #peaky blinders #peaky blinders imagine #black reader

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finrad · 4 years

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Is It Love - Finrod x Reader

This one is like 3k words and it took me forever to write and I'm proud of it.

Warning: It's kind of an emotional rollercoaster???

0o0o0

Finrod Felagund. The fairest and most beautiful elf in all of Arda, in your eyes. And yet he seems to choose to be drawn to you. A simple and plain elf that happens to live in Nargothrond. You were very drawn to Finrod. His blue eyes, his voice, and his golden hair are like a giant magnet while you were a piece of metal, slowly attaching to the king.

The way Finrod looked at you was different than the way you looked at him. You gave him sweet and gentle glances, while he gave flirty looks that continue to drag you to him. He looks at you with a gleam in his eye and as if he were a lion, ready to catch its prey. And you didn't seem to figure out what he was doing to you.

Some nights, you would have Finrod at your side, as gently whispered some cold elvish phrases into your ears. Phrases that were so full of lust or love and came out as smooth as silk. You couldn't believe that such a king would fall for you.

Other nights, you lay in bed alone, thinking about the bitterness of the world. Heartbreak, death, and all that junk. These nights were the ones where you felt incredibly overwhelmed. Your weariness was sometimes very visible, as many have noted that you appear to be tired or worn out.

"It was, but you need to realize that I don't want it to be like this." Your lips turned in a frown, and you were looking down. To hide the shimmering tears that slid down your face. "You see, I want to have a relationship with love in it. I don't want this... whatever this is. I want you."

Perhaps having someone at your side assuring you that it will all be fine helped you not feel cold and afraid. Finrod had always made you feel fine, but little did you know that he was playing games, and slightly toying with you. Not in a horrific way that will kill you, but in a way that confused you. A way that hid his feelings. A way that led you into him, and think the wrong things. Boy was he good.

Finrod's words always led you to think that you're in total love and someday you'll be wedded to him. Whether or not that was the intention of the king, you had to figure out. People have told you things that you weren't too sure about. They said that the king was baiting you in with sweet kisses and gentle words, and you were soon to be reeled into an ugly game of love and lust.

Obviously, the words of the others made you question this romance you have with Finrod. Was it all a lie? Was all of this just good fun or was it love that was endearing and true? Elves weren't for these types of things, so this whole experience was weird for you.

One day, you decided that you had no choice but to confront Finrod about everything that has ever happened between you. That is, until you fall into his arms and he'll kiss you in such a tender way. This madness was making your head spin. Why, out of all of the elves, whether they be in Valinor or on Middle-earth, did this have to be on your hands? Who decided that this is to be your life?

"Finrod?" you squeaked, the moment you laid eyes on him today. "There must be a discussion between us. About what we are." The king was tall and mighty, and you were slightly intimidated by his power. Never have you been this scared. At this point, you wanted to simply melt and not have to go through this.

"What do you think we are?" Finrod asked, his smooth voice trailing you in. As he spoke, you got closer to him, until your chest was against his. Here goes nothing.

"I-I don't know." you answered. "That's why I'm asking you. I'm not too sure if–" Your words were cut off by a kiss. One that was passionate. Instead of separating from him to continue speaking, you melted into the kiss. And that was something you regretted doing.

Finrod moved away just a hair and whispered, "Isn't this just plain fun? To me, this is you and I, having a wonderful time."

What does this mean? Before you could ponder any longer, Finrod placed his lips against yours and now he's the only one you can think about. People were watching this happen, which caused you to be nervous. This had to stop.

Quickly making a new distance, you said, "Finrod, so is this not love?" The king smirked and shrugged.

"That is up for interpretation." he replied. So this all must be a lie. It's secretly lust hidden behind a mask. You couldn't go on any longer. What's the point of being with him if he was going to continue to not truly love you. At the moment, you felt tricked; deceived. Finrod never looked like somebody who was like this. He seemed like the kind of person who would love somebody, and never lie about it.

Leaning in to continue to kiss you, Finrod placed his arm around your waist. You were no longer going to be tangled up in this mess any longer. So, you decided to push him away and cross your arms. You wanted this to be serious. You wanted you and Finrod to be real. But it didn't seem to be that.

"What was that for?" the king asked, his voice more childish. You've never heard him talk like this. "Didn't you like this? Wasn't it all fun?"

"Of course." you told him, now wrapping your hands around his neck. Then, Finrod kissed you sweetly, as the fireflies danced with the flowers. Instead of the feeling of regret and intoxication that you used to get from his kisses, you got the feeling of pure and electric love. Your heart fluttered, and his lips had a taste that you haven't had for a long, long time.

"You do have me, though." Finrod retorted. "You have had me since the days we first met, in the gardens while the moon was out."

That day was seemingly the best day of your life. Fireflies danced around the two of you, and the flowers were fully bloomed, ready to be picked. In that moment, you felt that Finrod was the one. Yet now, you weren't so sure. In fact, now, you were convinced that there wasn't a person for you. After falling into this, you never wanted to love again.

"I don't believe you." you told Finrod, with a stern tone. "Right now, it's best if we don't kiss or stay together. Come back to me when you learn how to love."

Although it was late at night, you decided to go drink some wine to wash the sadness away. No one was going to join you. You didn't want to cry with a friend, you wanted to cry alone in the dark and wake up with a fuzzy memory of it all. At home, you brought out a small bottle and began to drink.

This day is the worst one ever. Just now, you had found out that the elf that supposedy loved you in fact didn't love you. He probably never did. Sniffles and sobs could be heard from your room. Please say that nobody is nearby, listening to this whole fiasco. If somebody listened in and mentions it later, you'd be so embarrassed to the point that you'd flee from this place.

Approximately an hour ticked by. You had one too many glasses of wine. A knock came to your door, and you decided to open the door. Your fingers were tingling, and you felt as if you could drop to the floor and wake up hours later with a tiny headache.

It was Finrod, at your door. With a small flower in his hand. What did he want? He can't have learned to love now. It has only been an hour or two since you broke things off with him. The two of you were over now.

"Mae govannen." said Finrod. "I have come here to say that I love you." His hands went to your shoulders and he went in for a kiss. Falling into his game once more, you began to kiss him, the feeling of shame and pleasure in you. You fell for him again, but it felt wonderful. The taste of his lips sent you on a ride.

Soon, your hands dug into his gorgeous hair. It was perfect, not a single knot on it. Kissing Finrod was so wrong. All of this was wrong. You moved away, speechless. What have you done?

"I..." you hesitated. One wrong word and then you'll find yourself in a sticky situation. "love you." Oh, for goodness' sake. That was not the right thing to say. And the next thing you know, you find yourself kissing the tall king of Nargothrond.

The next morning, you woke up next to Finrod. This was not what you wanted. You went to fix your hair and change your clothes. And so you did that, wanting to get out without waking Finrod up.

Out you were, hoping that you wouldn't run into Finrod again. If you did, you knew that you were going to be in his grasp. He always cared for his people, but you felt that he made an exception for you. No, he didn't mistreat you. He just slightly took advantage of you. This side of the king was one that only you have seen with your very eyes. Because only one who end up in love with him could see it.

If only he loved you. If only you lived happily with him, and every single "I love you" was true. But, life always gives people obstacles to go over. And you struggled to get over this one.

Right now, you craved his love. You craved just one taste of what he is like to one that he truly loves. Not even a full experience. Just a single taste. He stayed on your mind, and you wished to never think of him. But then again, you wanted to think about him.

Nobody around you noticed that you were struggling. All they saw was a happy face that you put on to make sure that everyone assumed that you were fine. You wanted to handle this alone, and if anyone learned of your sadness, the whole kingdom will end up knowing thanks to gossip.

The skies were blue and the sun high. Currently, it was laer, which was the elvish name for what humans call summer. Usually, people associate this season with sunshine, joy, and warmth. However, you were feeling as if dark clouds were above your head. You felt cold and broken.

Curse that elf that broke your heart. He ruined your laer. Instead of being happy with him and enjoying a life under the Sun, you had a case of some summertime sadness. Right now, a kiss from Finrod would cheer you up, but not in this case. It would only make things worse.

Why was he still on your mind? It's not like you wanted him anymore. Images of the old times where you and Finrod seemed to be in love flashed by. If only they were made by genuine love. But instead, they were made by a false love that you weren't aware of.

It was going to be long time until you want to even look at Finrod again. And what sucked is that you lived under his rule, you had to see him. There is no other option. You didn't want to run away. Kinslayings had recently happened, and darkness was upon this world. You didn't want to put yourself at risk. Chances are, you'd get killed if you did. And you didn't want to die. Death was not an option.

Later, you realized that you needed to head home, or else you might end up running into Finrod. At home, you told yourself to never answer the door if there is a knock. Risks could not be taken now. If you took a risk, you would end up harming yourself.

***

Days have passed since you spoke to Finrod. Leaves were beginning to fall from trees and the air was beginning to get cooler. You lived in peace, and you were happy. No more tears, no more sadness. Or so you thought.

Secretly, you desired for Finrod to come back. A desire burned brightly inside of you. You wanted him to love you. To treat you with care and shower you with affection. Because you had this desire, you spent days staring at a portrait of him. Longing for his love. You said that you never wanted to see him again, but you were lying to yourself.

Tonight, you ran outside under the pale moonlight, wearing a white gown that you believed to be your favorite one. To the gardens you went, to secretly weep and dance. You were happy, until you found your longing for Finrod to be so strong that you couldn't contain yourself.

While you danced, you felt a cold hand on your shoulder. A hand that gave you memories of the past. One that reminded you of love and heartbreak. Whose hand was it? It was none other than Finrod's. He stood behind you, standing with his back slouched and with a painful frown.

"We meet again." you said. "I haven't spoken to you in months."

"I know. And I don't like that." Finrod told you. He looked at you with a face that you have never seen before. One that you saw your parents give each other every day. "Let me explain myself to you, please."

"No." you sternly stated. "I know that you'll say that you love me and then we'll go through this insane cycle again." Finrod tried to continue talking, but instead, you ran away from him. You can't trust him now, no matter how much you love him.

Oh, Valar, did you want him. You wanted him to tell you that he loves you again. Even if he didn't mean it... What are you thinking? That thought was absolutely absurd. Maybe you do need to talk to somebody about this crazy mess that you and Finrod made.

To vent out your issues, you decided to talk to your friend. She was a kind elleth who would understand and be caring. You knew that she was the right choice. This was actually the first time you've ever vented to a friend. People have said that it feels nice to get everything off of your chest, so you hoped they were right.

"Hello, what would you like to talk about, mellon nin?" your friend asked you.

"It's about Finrod. I need to get this off my chest." you answered. "Well, we kind of split up like months ago... and today he came back telling me that he loves me."

"Why did you two break up?"

"He didn't really love me, and I didn't want to be in a relationship without love."

"Then he doesn't deserve you. Even if he is a king, don't take him back. You deserve to be loved." You figured that she was right, but what if Finrod loved you now?

"I think he does deserve me though..." you said. "Recently, I have been longing for him, and I'm not sure what to do."

"I'd say to go with your heart." Your friend flashed a smile. "If your heart tells you that he is definitely the one, then it's most likely true."

You took your friend's advice and thought about it. Thinking about it all day made you really want to see Finrod again. He's irresistible, honestly, like an appealing dessert sitting right in front of you. It was bad for you, but you wanted it. Or was he bad for you? There is a chance that he's what you need.

The next night, you figured that you have made a decision. Hopefully, you won't regret it. Because there might not be going back. There might be a chance that you won't be able to change your mind. You were nervous, for you didn't know what the future had for you. This choice could change your future. It could help or hurt it, depending on how Finrod feels. You wanted this choice to help your future.

That night, you went to the gardens to wait for Finrod. You had a gut feeling that he'd be coming back, to find you alone and dancing in the dark under the pale light of the moon. Tonight could be the best or worst night you've ever had.

Finally, after what felt like an eternity of waiting, you saw Finrod coming in from the distance. Goodness, was he handsome. His blond hair that he inherited from his father, Finarfin, was the best hair you've ever seen. He told you once that his sister, Galadriel, probably had the best hair out of his family, but you think that he is wrong. But, who knows, perhaps she does have the best hair, and you are yet to see it.

The king called your name in a desperate tone. The look on his face screamed "I'm utterly in love." Once he made it to your side, you pursed your lips, preparing to tell him what you needed to say. You were so nervous, though. You were as nervous as you were on the day you first told Finrod that you loved him. Your heart was pounding in your chest, and your legs were shaking.

Now, the sky was decorated with beautiful little stars that shine bright along with the moon. You now wore a red gown, while Finrod wore a grey gown. Both of you had your hair loose, flying with the soft wind. Flowers were underneath your feet, swaying as the wind blew.

You took Finrod's hands and saw that little fireflies surrounded you. They danced in the night while the two of you spoke. This moment felt so magical, as if it were straight out of a fairy tale. Fairy tales weren't really your thing, but you were glad to feel as if you're living in one.

"Listen to me..." you hesitated. "I would like you to speak the truth and only the truth. If I catch a lie in whatever you are saying, we will never speak again. Do you love me?"

"Of course I do." Finrod replied. "I lied to you back when we were together, but that was because I didn't take things slow enough with you. I let things happen too fast."

A smile tugged on your lips. "Do you care to prove it? I don't wish for another crazy mess to happen again."

"Well, you're never off my mind. You stay in there, dancing with your hair flying in the wind. I want to love and hold you for as long as I live. No longer do I want to use you and trick you." he said. "I now know what it means to love. I know how love feels. And I feel love for you."

"Hey, Finrod?" you said. The king gave you a small nod. "I believe you. And I love you as well."

"So can we start again, and correctly this time?" he asked, feeling a little hopeful.

Ever since that day, you found the side of Finrod that he shows to his lover. The side that you have always wanted to see since the day you met him. Boy, was life great.

#finrod #finrod felagund #the silmarillion #the silmarillion x reader #findarato #x reader #fanfic #fanfiction

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nataliedanovelist · 4 years

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GF - How A Star Is Born ch.V

A Hercules AU, founded by @evaroze, whom this fic is a gift for. I hope y’all like it!

ch.IV - ch.VI

AO3 link

~~~~~~~~~~

Years went by. Both Dipper and Mabel went through vigorous training under their uncles’ supervision. After allowing Mabel to visit the world, Stanford had combat training be added to her lessons so, if needed, she could defend herself. Now a master of duel swords and a brand new goddess of the arts, Mabel spent her days inspiring humans, helping to keep Olympus beautiful and safe, and exploring the woods throughout Greece.

She also spent a lot of time talking to Dipper. At least once a week he would sit at night and draw in his journal to talk to his sister, swapping stories and inspiring each other to learn and grow.

Dipper was no longer a scrawny little boy, but a strong, muscular, clever young man of seventeen. Stan had never been more proud in his entire life, boxing with the kid and having him go through trials and tests and watching him grow up. He even managed to teach Dipper a few swears.

Stan coughed into his fist, standing at the end of the most difficult obstacle course Dipper had ever been set to. He grinned as Dipper emerged from shark-infested waters, blazing hoops, electric spikes, and racist homophobes, without a scratch on him, and Stan and Dipper high-hived and cheered and celebrated.

“You did it, kid! You were great!”

“Thanks, I couldn’t have done without you.” Dipper said with a smile.

“Obviously.” Stan smirked, earning him a soft punch in the beer belly. “Oof! Okay, okay. You go pack up, ya gremlin. We’re going to Thebes!”

“Isn’t that place, like, the worst place in Greece?” Dipper asked as they headed back to the Mystery Shack.

“You got it, you’ll be just what the doctor ordered.” Stan explained. “Young hero like you can help a lot of people in an Underworld-hole like that. Great place to start out. If you can make it at the Big Olive, you can make it anywhere.”

The men set sail before the sun rose the next morning. For some odd reason, Stan locked up the shack in a way that made it seem like they were never coming back, but Dipper assumed it was only because Stan believed that Dipper could make it big. The young man smiled, determined not to let his teacher down, and made sure they were on the right track.

After sailing across the ocean for a few hours, they floated into a river that traveled along the woods, taking a shortcut for Thebes rather than travel through the sea for Greece. Stan was resting in a chair with a cold drink in his hand, letting Dipper sail for a while, when they heard a scream.

The old man shot up and grinned. “Perfect! A damsel in distress! Good warm-up before we hit down. Lower the anchor here.”

Dipper did as he was told and they crept down the river for the waterfall, where they saw a young lady stumble away, groaning and growling in her throat.

The girl had long, beautiful blonde hair and stunning blue eyes that crackled like raging fire, wearing a long baby-blue dress. She hurried to her feet but was soon scooped up by the enemy that came around the river bend.

A huge Manotaur with a toga around his waist was so huge he grabbed the woman in his fist around the waist. “Not so fast, sweetheart.” He growled.

“Put me down right now, Chutzpah, or I’ll…!” The woman threw a punch at the monster, but he held her away and laughed.

“I like ‘em fiery!”

“HEY!” Dipper yelled from the riverbank and stomped on the river, leaving Stan in the bushes to munch on some popcorn.

“My money’s on Hooves.”

The girl and Chutzpah stared at the newcomer and the monster growled, “Beat it, twerp, I’m busy.”

“Sorry, mister, but you’re gonna let her go, or…”

“Keep moving, junior.” The girl sneered.

“... or I’ll…” Dipper’s sentence dropped and shattered. “But aren’t you… er, a damsel in distress?”

“I’m a damsel.” The woman said as she tried to pull herself free from the giant fist. “I’m in distress. I can handle this. Have a nice day.” She said with a sly grin with cold blue eyes.

Dipper swallowed and cleared his throat, reaching for his sword. “Uh, ma’am, I think you might be too close to this situation to realize your…” But the Manotaur punched him with so much force that Dipper flew onto a big boulder on the other side of the river.

Stan winced while Chutzpah laughed and the damsel looked bored. “C’mon kid, shake it off!” The old man coached.

Dipper charged, leaving his sword behind, and started to toss left and right hooks back and forth and landing, making the monster dizzy, and then used his head to hit him so hard it was his turn to fly back onto a hard surface, landing behind the waterfall and dropping the girl in the process.

“YES! That’s what I’m talking about, sport! Keep it up!”

“UGH!”

Dipper looked down at the wet girl and gently scooped her up out of the river to sit on a rock. “Oh, I’m sorry, ma’am. That was dumb… Excuse me, please.” And he and Chutzpah resumed their battle, the demigod using his strength to throw the Manotaur over his shoulder and putting him in a head-lock.

“Fight! Fight! Fight!” Stan chanted while the girl rang her hair dry, a smirk on her face.

“Not bad, not bad.”

“What are you talking about, he’s great!” Stan cheered. “Throw him a left! Atta boy!”

With one final punch, Dipper made Chutzpah the Manotaur fly up in the air and then come back crashing down face first in the water, a shiny bruise on his snooze button.

“Alright! Nice work!” Stan coached. “You could’ve gone without the distraction from a pair of big goo-goo eyes, but good recovery! Alright, let’s hit the water and move on.” And he walked off for the boat.

But once again, Dipper was distracted. The woman was rubbing her arms dry and sliding off the rock to stand, stretching her slender back; Dipper’s face felt hot and his whole body felt like it wasn’t even there. “Uh… are you alright, miss…?”

“Pacifica.” The girl said with a voice that dripped with sarcasm, like she believed she had better things to do than be standing here and talking to him, but she didn’t know what. “I’m fine. Thanks for the save. So, you got a name to go with all those rippling pectorals?”

“Uh… um, ah… I’m uh… uh…”

“Don’t speak Greek or something?”

“Dipper!” The man cleared his throat and answered in a calmer tone. “M-My name is Dipper. How did you get mixed up with the…”

“Knucklehead with hooves?” Pacifica finished for him. “Ah, you know how men are. They all think ‘no’ means ‘yes,’ and ‘get lost’ means ‘take me, I’m yours.’ Well, thanks for everything, Dip. Bye-bye.” And Pacifica began to walk away.

“Wait!” Dipper called out quickly, a reflex of seeing someone beautiful and cool-headed going away, and he offered sheepishly, “Uh, c-c-can I give you a ride on my boat, erm, me and Stan’s boat?”

“I’m fine,” Pacifica giggled coldly. “I’m a big tough girl, I tie my own sandals and everything. I can look after myself. See ya, Dippin’ Dots.” And Dipper watched as she disappeared beneath a hill.

“Uh… bye.” Dipper said weakly, clumsy on his feet as Stan sailed their small boat behind him, going down the river for Thebes.

“OY! Knucklehead! We going or what?”

“Huh? Oh, yeah… yeah…”

Dipper pulled himself on board, smiling with his head in the clouds. Stan sighed and shook his head, muttering, “Twitterpated.”

As Pacifica walked further and further into the woods, the atmosphere got darker and darker. The young lady walked as coldly as the air, unafraid and all too familiar with who was approaching her. When a huge gust of blue fire erupted from the Earth and a floating triangle appeared before the teenage girl, she rolled her eyes and sneered, “Great, I needed cheddar for dinner.”

Bill cackled as he held his three-sided body and kicked his legs in the air. “Oh, my little Llama. Care to explain what exactly happened?” He made a chess board appear before him with various pieces of monsters and anomalies on the board. “I thought you were gonna persuade the River Guardian to join my team for the uprising and, here I am, kinda River Guardian-less.”

“I gave it my best shot,” Pacifica said coldly as she flicked Chutzpah off the board. “But he made an offer I had to refuse.”

“Okay, fine,” Bill replied as he made the board disappear, closing it like a book. “Instead of taking two year from your lifetime sentence, Imma add two on, okay? You got your best shot?”

Pacifica groaned and walked away, leaning against a dead tree. “Look, it wasn’t my fault, okay. It was this Wonderboy who beat your Manotaur up.”

“Wonderboy?” Bill repeated.

“Some new hero who came with this big innocent farm-boy routine, but I could see through that in a Peloponnesian minute.” Pacifica said with a cold snap of her fingers.

“New hero, huh?” Bill said, a hand to what might have been his chin but was really just under his eye. “If some new guy is beating up my minions it could weaken our chances of over-throwing Sixer…” The demon stopped his talking when he heard a voice. He swooped Pacifica up into the trees as a dark cloud, just in time to hide from the intruder.

Mabel was running through the woods with a pig at her feet. He had grown quite large since the young muse had met the pig, and now they both ran as fast as they could, but the teenage girl made it to a tree first, planting a hand on it, making the dead tree sprout leaves with life, and she jumped and cheered and punched the air. “That’s twenty-two for me… How about twenty-two out of forty-five?” She asked Waddles.

The big tired pig flopped over and showed his belly lazily. Mabel awed and fell to her knees to scratch him. “Aw, you’re just a big dummy-dumb. C’mon, why don’t we go see if Grunkle Ford is too busy to hang out. This Mabel’s gotta have some family time.” And she picked up her pet pig and skipped back home.

Bill plunged back onto the ground, dropping Pacifica, who sat on a rock boringly, as Bill glowed red with fire and yelled loudly, “WHAAAAAAAAAAAAAAT?!” And soon every tree circling them was no more.

~~~~~~~~~~

“Who’s a cute lil guy? You are!” Gideon said into his hand mirror, sitting at the front desk of the Underworld.

The huge doors flew open as Bill, still red and fiery with anger, entered and grew to the size of a giant before his minion. “YOU SAID YOU TOOK CARE OF THE TWINS!”

“The what now?” Gideon asked calmly.

Bill towered down at the white-haired chubby teenager and bellowed, “Sixer’s brats! The ones destined to stop me from ruling this dimension! You said they were dead as doornails! But the girl is still alive!”

“Yeah, so?” Gideon asked. “The prophecy said both twins had to be there for you to lose. There’s only one. So there. And besides it took you seventeen years to realize Stanford was still dotting on his niece. If anything you suck at keeping up with your own prey.”

Bill shrunk down, shaking with anger and still red, but he had to admit that the jerk was right. “Fine, but the boy, Mason, is dead, right?”

“More or less.”

“”WHAT DO YOU MEAN MORE OR LESS?!”

“He will be when the mortal world is done with him.” Gideon sneered with a crooked smile. “That scrawny twerp doesn’t stand a chance in Thebes.”

“And you know all of this HOW?!”

“It’s fun watching him struggle and lose.” Gideon admitted with a shrug.

“I’m not taking any chances!” Bill yelled and floated away. “We’ve got one year until I can free my friends and take over this dimension! Since I can’t curse Shooting Star into a mortal, I can still kill Pinetree.”

“I’m telling you,” Gideon said, following his boss. “That loser doesn’t stand a chance. I know just who to send to kill him.”

And Bill’s anger melted away as he listened to his minion’s plan and helped make it better.

#GF #gravity falls au #fanfiction #hercules #dipper pines #mabel pines #stan pines #pacifica northwest #bill cipher #hope you like it!!!#gift

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meta-squash · 3 years

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Brick Club 1.4.1 “One Mother Meets Another”

This Book title really gets me. “To Trust Is Sometimes To Surrender.” Which, I don’t know, feels really helpless. And helpless in a way that could be prevented, too, if there had just been more questions asked or something, maybe. Probably not. But poor Fantine, and poor Cosette, being forced into trusting people who take advantage of everyone they see.

The first thing that we see of the Thenardiers is nothing at all to do with Fantine’s storyline, but everything to do with Marius’. The Sergeant Of Waterloo sign, with its bad painting (I love Hugo’s sassy “on which something was painted”).

But it’s not the sign that makes Fantine stop, but a huge cart with an enormous chain. The Robb biography says that the cart visual was something Hugo saw as a child while he was crossing the border at Saint-Jean-de-Luz while returning to France from Spain. The cart and its chain are symbolism of both an obstacle and a veiled threat. It “might have been mistaken for a giant gun-carriage” and is “crushing” and “hideous.” The way Hugo describes the mud coating the lower half of this cart makes it sound like it’s slowly being covered by a yellow disease. Also, this is the second instance of chain imagery in as many chapters. We also get more imagery of obstruction a few paragraphs later.

Hugo makes it really obvious that this cart is here as an obstruction, literally and figuratively. The figurative is twofold. It is metaphor for the obstruction that the Thenardiers become for Fantine, taking all of her money and lying about Cosette in order to do it, making it impossible for her to stay afloat at Montreuil-sur-Mer. He also uses it to critique the “old social order.”

“Why was this vehicle in this place on the street? First to obstruct the lane, and then to complete its work of rusting. In the old social order we find a host of institutions like this across our path in the full light of day, with no reasons for being there.” Hugo’s critique of the “old social order,” which I’m assuming is the empire.

There’s so much symbolism in the young Eponine and Azelma swinging on the chain. They are swung back and forth by their mother, a symbolism of their own future, akin to the image of Fantine as the horse. They’ll be tied to Mme Thenardier and used by her in the future. Not only that, but the chain is huge enough to be reminiscent of the chains of the bagne; prison is a constant threat to them once they reach Paris. “Above and around the delicate heads, steeped in joy and bathed in light, the gigantic hulk, black with rust and almost frightful with its tangled curves and sharp angles, curved like the mouth of a cave.” What intense symbolism for the darkness and struggle that awaits them in Paris in the future.

“A mother, seeing this frightful chain, had said, ‘Now there’s a toy for my children!’“ First of all this feels like a sassy critique of Mme Thenardier’s parenting decisions. But it’s also a hint at their poverty and debt despite the nice clothing. Instead of tying a rope to a branch or something, the decision to turn a huge hulking terrifying chain into a swing for two tiny children...it’s just a lot.

God, the drastic difference between Cosette’s description and Fantine’s description. Cosette is all beauty and light. She’s “charmingly rosy” She’s dressed in linen and lace. Fantine’s description begins with a question mark. “She was young--pretty?” In 1.3.3, Hugo specifically points out Fantine’s “fine teeth” and her long, blonde hair as points of her beauty. Here, she has her hair wrapped up in a tight cap fastened under her chin, and she never smiles. She looks upset and ill and hard-worked. Lines are forming on her face and her skin is calloused. From here on out her beauty is either a small physical remnant or is purely an inner beauty.

What’s the kerchief fold for invalids that Hugo talks about? Does anyone have an image of that? Also why would invalids fold a kerchief over their chest? Is it the blue kerchief specifically that’s used by invalids, not the fold style?

So if it was August last chapter, it’s June now. If it was December-ish (from the sunset at 4:30 thing) then it’s October. If they’re outside playing on a swing, it’s probably more likely that it’s June. Hugo really just does not care about telling us the time of year unless it is Symbolically Important.

The friendship between Fantine and the rest of the grisettes was tenuous at best, manipulative and cruel at worst. But Hugo implies that none of the other grisettes stayed together either. They “no longer had any reason to be friends” despite suffering the same let down--only the others expected it and Fantine didn’t. And the men probably not only remained friends long after, they probably also made connections and used each other to gain social points and climb the ladder.

“Led by her liaison with Tholomyes to disdain the simple work she knew how to do, she had neglected her opportunities; now they were all gone.” This makes me think that for the two years she was with Tholomyes, she wasn’t working and he was supporting her and the child? Is this how it would have been? Or perhaps she was working, but other, better, more steady opportunities came up and she didn’t take them because of Tholomyes. Either way, her relationship with Tholomyes has fucked her over so many different ways. She doesn’t have a job should could have had, she has a child she can’t take care of, and she has a broken heart.

It’s also a huge clue to how little Fantine seems to know about how any of these affairs work and what’s going to happen to her that “she had a vague feeling of being on the brink of danger, of slipping into the streets.” The other grisettes kept their affairs very shallow, probably because of how acutely aware they were of how much power these men had over their lives and what a mistake could cost them. It’s why the lack of a parting gift in the last chapter was a huge let down for them--they probably should have gotten something expensive to make up for all the lost hours of work--but not as huge as it was for Fantine, who had already made that mistake.

“One day, Fantine heard some old women saying as they saw her child ‘Do people ever take such children seriously? They only shrug their shoulders at them!’ Then she thought of Tholomyes, who shrugged his shoulders at his child, and who did not take this innocent creature seriously, and her heart turned dark at the place that had been his.” Such a short series of lines on such a heavy realization. This is one of the reasons the English lyrics to I Dreamed A Dream irritate me so much. Before she even leaves Paris, Fantine’s heart has hardened to Tholomyes. She doesn’t yearn for him at all; from that point on her focus and love is purely about her child. She’s also angry here. She gets the message at this point and she’s upset about it. There’s also the double meaning of “who did not take this innocent creature seriously.” This line could be about Cosette, but it could also easily be about Tholomyes’ treatment of Fantine for the past two years.

“She had made a mistake, but, deep down, we know she was modest and virtuous.” Okay, Hugo, but what about other women who make mistakes? Are they not modest and virtuous? If they’re not, do they get different treatment? Again, back to his weird arguments from 1.3.2, about how “poverty and coquetry are fatal counselors” and how fallen woman are different from modest women, but also it’s society’s fault that they’re bad. I don’t know, Hugo seems to be confused in his moral opinions when it comes to this stuff.

(The more I learn about his youth while reading this biography, the more this kind of stuff makes sense. The “fallen women are bad” seems to be the kind of opinion he had in his youth, and the “it’s a societal problem” is an elder Hugo opinion. The two thoughts are kind of duking it out in these descriptions of working women.)

“We will see that Fantine possessed a fierce courage.” We get Fantine’s strengths in pieces: she is wise in that she notices things other people don’t notice, she possesses a fierce courage, and she has her capacity to love Cosette completely and sacrifice everything for her. This is also the second time we get a description of her as “fierce,” the first being in 1.3.4. Fantine’s courage and specifically her fierceness come out even more later on. We get the impression that had she lived in better circumstances, she would have been a force to be reckoned with. Again, I’m still reading this Graham Robb biography of Hugo, but the descriptions of Fantine’s characteristics remind me of a sort of ragged description of what Hugo’s mother seemed to be like.

“The woman had nothing in the world but this child, and this child had nothing in the world but this woman.” This just made me really sad because when Fantine goes to Montreuil-sur-Mer, she will have nothing in the world but Cosette. But Cosette won’t even know she exists.

We then learn about the fate of Tholomyes, similar to that of Bamatabois. Hugo has such an interesting perspective on law and lawyers. His characters that go to law school and complete it are all rich assholes who use their power and connections for pleasure and to ruin the lives of those in classes beneath them. Those who don’t complete due to other personal circumstances (Bahorel, Bossuet) or due to death (most of Les Amis) are the opposite. I’m wondering if this is commentary on law in general. Knowing it academically but not falling into the comfort of taking advantage of it, by leaving it instead? We don’t know what happens to Marius after Valjean’s death but I wonder if he would keep his more generous nature or fall prey to the bourgeois/Ultra personalities that hover around Gillenormand.

“The presence of angels is a herald of paradise.” An interesting sentence and description considering the ominous descriptions of what they’re swinging on. There are just so many ominous signs here amidst all the beauty of children and sunlight. You just want to yank Fantine back and go “Wait! Stop! Pay attention! Look at all the badness!”

Mme Thenardier gets so many animalistic descriptions. M Thenardier is later, in Paris, described as a wolf. Mme Thenardier gets she-wolf then, as well as sow and tigress. Here she gets “that animal yet celestial expression peculiar to motherhood.” (An interesting description considering Fantine is also a mother, but her expressions are tender and passionate.) There’s also, “The most ferocious animals are disarmed by caresses to their young,” which is such an ominous sentence. Mme Thenardier’s cruelty is different from her husbands. His is greedy, hers is jealous. There’s also the moment where Hugo says “she sang between her teeth,” a visual that reminds me of a growl. So many threats in her description, and Fantine doesn’t notice any of them, because Mme Thenardier is sitting down, and that makes her less threatening. Plus her reading of trash romance novels makes her docile, relaxed and coy, which apparently hides this animal underneath.

“A person seated instead of standing: Fate hangs on just such a thread.” This is such a huge aspect in this book, summarized in such a short line. Time and place is so important in this novel, for everyone. So much of this novel is hinged on someone happening to be in the right place at the right time (or the wrong place at the wrong time) or happening to recognize someone, or happening to do or fail to do something that totally changes the course of everything around them.

What’s up with Cosette and flies? Here she’s digging a grave for a dead fly, and later she has a tiny lead sword that she uses to cut the heads off flies. Is this just a little kid characteristic that Hugo noticed in his own grandchildren and decided to include, or is this symbolism of some sort that I’m missing?

I’ve heard that Fantine (read: Hugo) gets from Euphrasie to Cosette from “Chosette” which means “little thing.” Is that true or is that just someone making stuff up? If it is true, I can’t help the amusing thought that Cosette’s name is then basically “Sproglet” but in French. Also the “Josefa into Pepita” is maybe a reference to Pepita, the Marquesa de Montehermoso, who Hugo met when he was about 10 and she about 16. I couldn’t find anything about Francoise into Sillette, except that Hugo’s own son was called Victor-Francois? And nothing at all on Theodore into Gnon.

The moment Cosette leaves Fantine’s arms to go play with the other girls, Fantine ceases to be Fantine and instead becomes “the mother.” She is “the mother” for the rest of the chapter. She loses her selfhood the moment she loses Cosette. From that moment on, to the Thenardier’s at least, she’s just the mother of this child they have to deal with, the mother that they can suck money from whenever they want.

“It would be odd if I left my child naked.” This is such a weird line. I feel like this goes in line with interpreting Fantine as autistic. The Thenardiers are asking pretty obvious leading questions about money and costs and then about clothes. But Fantine doesn’t pick up at all on the weirdness or the sinister nature of their questions; she just thinks it’s weird that they might assume she’d leave her child without clothes.

“You’ve build a good mousetrap with your little ones” “Without even knowing it.” The adult Thenardiers fall into this over and over again. Often opportunities fall into their lap when they’re least expecting it; they plan using the new knowledge (as with getting money for young Cosette or attempting to kidnap Valjean) or they just run with it (as with meeting Valjean in the sewers). Sometimes they plan things, like with M Thenardier’s letters attempting to garner fake charity or patronage. But most of the time it seems like they just wait for a random chance and then jump on it. Which seems far more successful than any of Thenardier’s business endeavors, which is maybe why he ended up in such debt in the first place.

This entire scene feels very fae, very evil trickster-like. A lure or trap (the children), a false reassurance (Mme Thenardier) and the real evil not revealing itself until much later (M Thenardier). You just want to call out to Fantine and warn her of the danger that she doesn’t see. But it’s all hidden in a fae glamour, making everything look sweet and safe and beautiful, and she doesn’t notice all the sinister, ominous things in the corner of the eye because everything else is so bright and angelic.

#les miserables #les miserables meta #brickclub #lm 1.4.1 #les mis #les mis meta #oh god it's so long i'm so sorry #this is my problem i am Too Verbose #especially for such mediocre observations but oh well i guess that's just how i am

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coll2mitts · 3 years

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Super Mario Bros. (1993)

Thanks to the awesome people who donated to Extra Life (you still can, btw!) y'all will now be treated to a retrospective on the 1993 classic movie, Super Mario Bros. When I took on this milestone, the first (and only) person I messaged for ideas on terrible (but wonderful) films based on video games was my friend Max, who has a history of viewing and talking about bad movies. He suggested this, and while I was aware of this magnificent piece of cinema history, I had not had the pleasure of viewing it myself. He hooked me up with a copy, and to say this film lived up to my expectations would be an understatement.

I couldn’t help but be charmed by this movie. It is filled with so many questionable creative choices that were fucking ridiculous. Mario and Luigi not being blood related? Sure. Cheesy Italian accents replaced with a New York ones? Yeah, why not? Having all the enemies in Super Mario Bros. be canonically dinosaurs? I mean... It's a choice informed by the great media dino wave of 1993, but whatever. Yoshi is a dinosaur, if we want to extend that to goombas and Koopa for whatever reason, I'm down. Having these dinosaurs live underneath New York City in a parallel dimension? It's based on a video game, why the fuck not? Everything is so goddamn bonkers.

The opening credits roll, and we’re told that 65 million years ago, a meteor created said underground parallel universe dinosaur land. We witness a human-looking woman, who is really a dinosaur, leaving an egg baby on a church doorstep. Don’t think about it too hard, the logistics of a human giving birth to an egg that size are just... it’s gross to think about.

We’re then introduced to the titular characters, Mario Mario and Luigi Mario. Yes, their last names are Mario. Making them the Mario brothers. Because this movie is interested in answering the important questions. Mario is the owner of a failing plumbing business, while Luigi is a conspiracy theorist who would have really enjoyed modern-day YouTube.

While they’re out trying to find work, they run into Miss Amy March herself, Daisy, who is an archeologist in charge of digging up dinosaur bones from a New York City construction site. She’s being forced off the property by the mob, who apparently are annoyed that a blonde lady in cargo shorts is coming between them and whatever the fuck they’re building.

They try and intimidate her, she storms off to use a payphone to call for security, and is almost picked up by two inconspicuous bozos in a cab who apparently are stealing Brooklyn women off the street for no reason. Their plan is quickly thwarted by a random moving pane of glass.

Instead, Daisy runs right into Luigi, who forgets how to human once he sees her pretty face. He asks her on a date, where she reveals even more exposition. She believes the meteor that destroyed the dinosaurs landed in New York City. Oh, and also, she’s the abandoned egg baby. Luigi is also an orphan, and this shared trauma apparently gets them both hot and bothered. They wander off to the dig site, because an underground pit attached to a sewer is so romantic, and it is also where Daisy feels the most comfortable.

What if we made out at the bone pit?

Their touching moment is cut short when the mob sabotages the plumbing in the sewer and water starts flooding the area. They run to get Mario, because he is a plumber, to fix the pipes, which is so fucking clutch, I love it so much.

While the Mario brothers are distracted, Daisy is captured by the weirdo twins and dragged into the alternate dinosaur universe. Mario and Luigi follow, and we’re treated to the most fucking amazing transition scene of Bob Hoskins spinning wildly through colorful rocks.

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Turns out, parallel dinosaur world, or Dinohattan, is fucking lit as hell. I am convinced that Futurama based their sewer city on this movie.

King Koopa, who is a dinosaur with badly bleached hair gelled back in an effort to look like Michael Douglas in Wall Street, has taken over Dinohattan. He is the one who asked the goons to kidnap Daisy, because of the tacky crystal necklace she wears. Apparently, it is a piece of the meteorite that crashed into earth, and once he puts the piece back into the original space rock, the dinosaur world will merge with the mammal world after 65 million years of his people being sequestered underground, and Koopa will have endless resources at his disposal. Also, Daisy is a princess, and her dad is a giant fungus taking over the city, so that’s totally normal and not at all weird.

Problem is, the two idiots he sent to grab her didn’t think to check if she was wearing the necklace. Turns out, Luigi has the necklace, or had the necklace, as they are quickly mugged by a granny, who is then robbed by a lady with a bright red spiky latex coat and springy robot feet. The brothers are then arrested by the dinocops and are grilled by Koopa for the whereabouts of the rock. When they play dumb he uh... reacts in a proportionate way.

I am not even going to attempt to explain the devo process... It is a combination of insane and fucking disgusting. Whoever in the costuming department looked at the cute fucking mushroom Goombas in the video game and decided to translate them into this scaly, jagged-teethed nightmare fuel deserves to be committed.

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Also, there’s only one lizard king, and that’s Jim Morrison, so back off, buddy.

What is hilarious to me is this is the story the screenwriters came up with. Super Mario, as a video game, doesn’t have much lore, right? You slide down pipes, you jump on mushrooms, and you save the princess from a spiky turtle. They took that game and created... This. A parallel underground dinosaur universe that has a sentient fungus as a king, taken over by a human-like t-rex that devolves other lizards into tiny-headed night paralysis demons.

The middle of this movie alternates between a slog of expositional scenes about Daisy being a princess, and pretty entertaining action scenes of the Mario brothers running from Goombas while trying to find and save Daisy. Mario and Luigi steal a cop car and drive it off a cliff Thelma and Louise-style; They cosplay as Ketchup and Mustard to steal the necklace back from Big Burtha while asking her to stomp on them; They jump off a bridge into a garbage truck; They break the pipes in Koopa’s building to freeze everything, and get past an elevator full of Goombas by making them dance.

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Watching Daisy damsel-in-distress-it in Koopa’s high rise office building and fend off advances by a long-tongued dude who devolved her father into a mushroom was pretty boring and disturbing. Alternatively, witnessing Bob Hoskins and John Leguizamo pretend to jump on giant sheets of fungus really sold this movie for me. It succeeds when it tries to be ridiculous and fun, and fall flat when it attempts to integrate any sort of drama that I’m assuming was added to make this story more appealing to adults.

Mario and Luigi eventually find Daisy, and she introduces them to her father - a giant dripping blob suspended from the ceiling. Luigi wants in her pants badly enough that he pretends this is a reasonable thing to do. Mario heads further into the building to free the other ladies kidnapped by tweedle dee and tweedle dum that they initially thought were Daisy, but weren’t. The newly assembled group are able to escape by sliding down the frozen pipes on a mattress before they are green-screen launched out of the pipe and back into the greater Dinohattan area.

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The amount of times Mario and Luigi use their plumbing skills to overcome obstacles may be my favorite part of this movie. The plot goes out of its way to justify a really bizarre character trait for the original game.

Anyway, the end of this movie comes at you fast. First, the sentient fungus king gives Mario and Luigi a bomb, and they decide to wind it up and aim it at Koopa. This takes about 10 minutes of screen time to matter again.

Koopa’s second-in-command tries to merge Daisy’s stolen necklace with the meteor, and instead gets skeletoned to bits, prompting the best line delivery reaction from Daisy, a deadpan “Yikes”.

Because the necklace has now been returned to its resting place, the worlds start to merge Infinity War style.

“Mr. Koopa, I don’t feel so good.”

Koopa and Mario end up back in Manhattan, and Koopa just starts shooting his devo guns at human mobsters, turning them back into primates, and giving their wardrobe a whole new literal definition of monkey suit.

Luigi uses his super plumbing powers to drill the necklace back out of the meteor, separating the worlds again. The bomb finally goes off, they devo Koopa into slime, and the citizens celebrate by immediately painting over his ever-prevalent propaganda.

The king evolves back into a mushroom person or something, and Daisy stays in Dinohattan to get to know her father better. Mario and Luigi return to their lives in Brooklyn as plumbers, and their heroic acts make them conspiracy community famous, as they now refer to our heroes as the Super Mario Brothers. Roll Credits.

Except not, because Daisy returns to ask for the help of a couple of great plumbers, setting up a sequel that will never, ever happen because there is no god and we’re not allowed to feel joy.

Honestly, Super Mario Bros. is great. It owned every bold plot and visual choice it made, and I have to respect it. I could listen to John Leguizamo say Mario like 700 more times. Y’all are missing out if you think you’re too cool to watch this movie.

I’ll be back to musical reviews later this month. I have a few seasonally appropriate movies in my big red sack waiting to be placed under the tree... Yes, I meant to phrase it that way.

#unwarranted opinion

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