LOSING IT 😭😭

Odysseus: What's up with Achilles? He has been laying on the floor for like.. an hour now?

Breises: He's a bit overwhelmed

Odysseus: And why is that?

Breises: Patroclus smiled at him

achilles and odysseus: *sitting in the jail*

odysseus: so what are we going to do now?

achilles: i would call patroclus, but i feel safer in the jail

odysseus: *thinking about penelope*

odysseus: same bro, same

Rereading TSOA and I don't think I will ever recover from "what has Hector ever done to me?"

Aeschylus: Achilles is a top.

Plato: Achilles is a bottom.

Aeschylus, lifting up a chair: TOP.

Plato, chucking his own chair across the room: BOTTOM.

Patroclus, in Elysium: Bottom.

Achilles, in Elysium: Bottom.

I hope to be talked about the way Patroclus talks of Achilles.

Ok but the cave scene in tsoa is actually so funny because Achilles really asked his mom if she could see them and then ran back to camp went up to Chiron and was like , “Are you tired, yeah your tired why don’t you go to bed,” before running back to the bedroom and lying in bed. Then he blurted out that his mom couldn’t see them while Patroclus was washing his face leaving him like shocked. Then while Patroclus is trying to sleep and Achilles is just staring at him probably thinking , “damn I can hit that now,” and , “it’s been three years” and it’s like written to elegantly

Agamemnon: are you disobeying your king?

Achilles: you bet your hairy butt I am

Chiron *talking about Patroclus and Achilles*: And they were roomates

Helios *spying*: OMG they were roomates

Life is miserable

Everything sucks

I will never know joy again for the rest of my life

On a separate note, I just finished the Song of Achilles

Achilles, drunk, strumming his lyre: I love you, bitch

Patroclus, entirely mortified: …oh gods

Achilles: I ain’t never gonna stop loving you…bitch

this is mildly related to my name but

why are all of the gay romance books I’ve read in a sentence “I would recognize him by touch alone, by smell; I would know him blind, by the way his breaths came and his feet struck the earth. I would know him in death, at the end of the world,” (The Song of Achilles, Madeline Miller).

and then the lesbian romance books are like Delilah Green dOesNt caRe, sHe HaS TaToOs, and isNT liKe tHe oTHeR GIrlS like I’m not upset but just I want some sweet lesbian or sassy gay like blend it up a little

patroclus: don’t you have that voice in your head that whispers “stop” to you before you do something stupid?

achilles: no?..

patroclus: ah

patroclus: that actually explains a lot

I just finished the song of Achilles- I-

The way this book breaks your heart

I think Madeline Miller is secretly a goddess

Petition to name a body part after Patroclus, since we have the “Achilles tendon”, and the two hate to be separated.