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#torturing blorbos is my favorite
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Hello hello…… lovely weather we’re having… the economy and inflation is wrecking havoc in the world but you know what is wrecking havoc in my MIND!? 🤔 any guesses? 🤨 fine, I’ll let you know this….
*sighs in happiness* *sighs again in angst* * sighs in a sigh*
I just want you to know that I have you will be the end of me, in a good way mind you! I want you to know that I have many tabs of your fics open, because you writing is addictive and the pain you cause to my poor lil heart is worth it. 😩😩💔💔🥺🥹🥹 makes me want to thank YOU for the excruciating pain time and time again.
Call Me Edward (I keep meaning to leave reviews, and I WILL! That one has me constantly emotional for Teddy, you know what I’ll send another ask for a director’s cut/symbolism if that’s alright with you? I cried many MANY times will reading this, I think that’s what keeps me from leaving reviews, I’m too busy reaching for Kleenex! 😭 even now as I eat a Jimmy John’s sandwich Im getting teary eyed as I remember all the pain Teddy went through 😩 )
Supernova (my weakness Tedromeda and lil Dora, plus Ted being all grumpy/angry leaves me like 👀 plus jealous Dromeda 🔥 )
The Nymph of the House of Black ( I read some snippets here on tumblr, and it’s been on my tbr list for THE LONGEST time! I believe there’s a scene in this one where Tonks meets that guy with No-Nose and does her best to block him from reading her thoughts? If I’m correct?)
Moonlight Marriage (on my tbr list as well, I see myself gravitating towards that fic in between the CME fic)
The Burdens of Time— this is the latest new fic and it’s already has its very own open tab on my phone, because the summary is everything. Tedoire is such an adorable couple and the whole Time Travel is something you are incredible at. Geez, I don’t know how you do it!
So many fics but it’s worth it, I don’t know how you are able to write so many long fics but I wanted to say thank you (for the heartbreak/healing of my heart as well!) because this is amazing. I hope you know that I appreciate all the hard work you put into your stories (fact check/characterization/dynamics/family history etc) you always leave me amazed, truly.
Please, continue wrecking havoc in both my heart and mind 🥹🥹🥹
@nena-96, this is why you are an international treasure of the HP fandom. This ask was the first thing I saw this morning and it's put SUCH a huge smile on my face (including me being the end of you emotionally, that's a fun accomplishment!).
Send me ANYTHING you like for any of my stories, including Call Me Edward! That was my first Teddy-centric fic. I put that cinnamon bun through hell and back and it was a ton of fun!
Supernova, my current muse, with heavy Tedromeda angst and darling little Dora. Just wait till you see what I do to Andromeda. JUST WAIT.
Oh ho my time traveling Tonks story!! Yes, Tonks becomes Dora in that one too, but a very different Dora from Supernova. The Dora of NOHB is severely traumatized, definitely more than Dora from Supernova. Neither version of Dora escapes my torture, however :D
Moonlit Marriage!! My favorite fic from 2023, hands-down. I think it's some of my best writing and characterization of Remus and Tonks. Putting them in an arranged marriage let me get to their personalities by putting them in this pressure cooker of emotion and then blowing them up. That was an emotional ride for me too.
The Burdens of Time - I started writing that last May. I love the concept of sending characters back in time, especially ones like Teddy who have lost so much. This time around I decided to send him back with Victoire, so he would have someone to lean on (even if he's currently crushing on her hard), and Scorpius and Albus, to shed some light on how the 'Lightning Era' kids would've been perceived by outsiders. Scorpius is *not* going to be impressed by young Draco, and Albus is going to be underwhelmed by young Harry. Lots of feelings will happen all around!
Thank you Nena, you are truly a treasure.
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tavina-writes · 11 months
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HERE I have thoughts about Huang Yaoshi and Huang Rong and Huang Rong's childhood because I am ALWAYS brainrotting about how like, HYS had SO MUCH trauma re: the death of his wife Feng Heng. But he has never once blamed his daughter OR traumatized her in any way. Huang Rong is quite literally the last (1) shred of his sanity and the only reason he's still alive! (The narrator even tells us this at one point.)
Originally, Huang Rong was the Peach Blossom Island Master Huang Yaoshi's only daughter. Before giving birth to her, her mother had a turn for the worse, which caused her to be physically and mentally exhausted, leading to her death soon after a difficult labor. Huang Yaoshi had a fit afterwards, expelling all his disciples from the island, leaving only the father and the daughter alone there. Huang Yaoshi was called the Eastern Heretic because of his peculiarity of conduct. He often said that the etiquette and customs of the world were all nonsense. His love for his daughter was excessive and he naturally did nothing to control her, thus allowing her to become arrogant and willful. Although she was intelligent, she was not willing to focus her mind on learning martial arts. Her father was actually very proficient in the ying yang five lines, learning these methods from several classics. She was able to learn when still very young but even though her father had already reached a divine level, she was nevertheless unable to go beyond the Peach Blossom Island martial arts basics. One day, she was playing in the island when she came upon her father's enemy imprisoned in the cave. Feeling lonely, she conversed with that person, talking for almost half a day. The person's words were interesting to her so that she often returned, seeking him out only to speak with him, finding relief in that exercise. Afterwards, Huang Yaoshi found out and reproached her severely. Huang Rong had never been beaten or scolded by her father so she reacted with anger and self-pity. Her cunning and unreasonable temperament manifested itself suddenly and she took the boat to escape Peach Blossom Island, thinking that no one cared for her there. Thus, she cut all wish for it and disguised herself as a poor, miserable youth, going in all directions, dissolute, though in her heart she was still with her father. She thought angrily, Since you don't love me, then I will make the world feel most pitiful for a young beggar!" However, she did not expect to meet Guo Jing in Zhangjiakou. At first, she went to the wine shop with him to spend his money and cause a disturbance, intending to lay on him her resentment towards her father. Who would have thought that he would be so dumb with no idea at all, talking with her as though they were old friends and even giving her his horse, showing his concern? She was bitter and lonely, thinking about how she deceived him but he continued to treat her honestly. She was touched. Since then, the two of them became good friends.
When we DO see HYS on page for the first time Huang Rong's internal thoughts go "oh no, I haven't seen dad in a few months but he looks like he aged a decade worrying for me 😭." NOW, HYS had been mad for like maybe (2) days that Rong'er ran away, but then he'd been searching for her for the entire rest of the time. (This also builds on my theory that this man is good at everything in the world except asking for directions bc Rong'er had been running around in the same region as their home (Jiangnan) with a giant painted sign "HI I AM HUANG YAOSHI'S SPOILED CONWOMAN DAUGHTER" for months on end as well.)
At a completely different point in this book, the narrator tells us that HYS built a suicide boat to sink himself and his wife's jade coffin to the bottom of the ocean and he repainted this boat every year, but could neither bear to leave Rong'er to be raised by servants OR take her onto the boat with her parents so he kept putting off his suicide boating and vowed to go boating only after Rong'er was grown up and married and didn't need a dad anymore. (At one point during the novel he is lied to and told that Rong'er died at sea and this man has a full on hysterical mental breakdown while screaming at the sky.)
There are SO MANY lines in this book where it's like "because he was looking at his beloved daughter, he could not help but be happy anyway!" and "oh the huangs are hugging again" and "Guo Jing (erroneously) thinks that Rong'er's dad must be the best guy on the planet bc Rong'er is so wonderful."
(also lolsob uh, in HSDS we learn that he finally DID go suicide boating after hearing that his daughter's entire family died at Xiangyang. Guo Xiang comes to her grandfather's house on Peach Blossom Island and there's a line of "and the docks were empty, all of the boats had gone.")
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horrorandarts-blog · 2 months
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Did I ever mention how much I adore general white
Because I feel like I should
He’s my blorbo and as such I’m going to torture the fuck out of him
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sovaharbor · 1 year
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Sova angst 18
o7
eyes emoji....... thank u for this treat o7 [ from here! ]
18. forced to watch
Fingers work their way through the hair at the top of Sova's head, taking hold by the root and yanking his head up. The beeping of the spike is incessant, and even in the playback of a security camera feed it feels like it's digging into his ears.
"You think I'm going to let you look away from this?"
Brimstone's voice cuts through the beeping, sharp and angry. His grip tightens around Sova's hair, pulls harder, holds him up straighter in his seat.
"This is your fault," Brimstone continues, voice falling lower. "You missed your shot. You let them plant the spike. You failed, Sova. You failed me, you failed your team, you failed our Earth -- and you failed yourself. Now watch."
He doesn't want to. He doesn't want to. He wants to close his eyes, melt into the chair, fade into nothingness, anything other than confront the fact that he's failed, that he's finally shown everyone that he isn't infallible like the man who never missed a shot purports.
But just as the spike is about to explode, Sova jolts forward with a wracking gasp.
He's not looking at a screen, and Brimstone doesn't have a hand in his hair; he's sitting in the dirt, knees to his chest, gun in his hands. The abandoned facility they're in is dark and quiet, practically a ruin. And Fade's head is on his shoulder, her breath puffing slow and steady against his neck. She's asleep. They both were.
"Fade," he hisses, shaking her shoulder. "Fade."
Fade startles awake with a gasp of her own, eyes flickering around wildly, gun raising, before her gaze settles on Sova. A sharp exhale passes through pouted-out lips. "Sorry," she whispers. Then, she lowers her gun and reaches for her pocket, starting to grimace. "Think I need a smoke after that one."
When she finally procures her pack of cigarettes, Sova wordlessly holds a hand out, and she gives him one with no complaint. That's the only acknowledgement either of them will give to what's just happened, Sova figures, and he's okay with that.
With a click of her lighter, Fade lights Sova's cigarette first. He lifts it to his lips, inhales, and lets the warmth burn in his lungs for a couple beats before exhaling in a steady breath.
It's dark enough that, even though they're keeping watch, the odds of anyone finding them from the trails of smoke they're about to let off is practically negligible. They're both hunters in their own rights; they both know this.
He just needs something to excuse the way his hands are shaking, anyway.
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yappacadaver · 5 months
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im just obsessed with his themes and motifs, i love when guys have suffering tailor-made just for them, and i love watching how their psyche tries to grow through the torture dungeon's twisting labyrinth, until the shape of their soul is a cast of it
#it's like pouring molten metal into an ant colony to make a cast#rational thoughts being the ants#mr delver i wont u...#this one goes out to all my favorite blorbos though#only the men though surprisingly i have a different type for women (creator of the torture dungeon)#but yea kakashi went through this too and it was so potent it probably shaped my 13 year old brain for good#though i gotta say in the suffering olympics raymond is probably one of the only ones to give kakashi a run for his money like i legit#hjave a hard time handing out the gold to either of them#i guess i would honestly HONESTLY have to hand it to raymond which is so!!! girl kakashi is an active combatant living under martial law To#but kakashi gets the chance to get better and he gets it multiple times... kakashi ends up with a family... even when things are bad he has#comrades and??? not to be like that but he has power. he's not helpless. he COULD have run away from it all (not saying he shouldve but it#was an OPTION at least)#Raymond is connecticut clarke if connecticut clarke had to resist against the forces of hell itself alone for his entire life with little t#no hope of ever escaping. no family. likely no friends (definitely none that are close and understand his situation). the only power he has#is a get out of jail free card but it's not free you have to carve a bit off of mama you gotta have a kidnapping victim to torture like. he#has nothing.#AND THE DAMN GET OUT OF JAIL FREE CARD ONLY WORKS SOMETIMES LIKE????? get crumpled ig
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Do normal sane people start writing a crossover fic with the sole purpose of a character from one fandom torturing a character from another fandom?
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What if I dropped a new sad Dabi fic based on an ask Kitten recently sent 👀 what would you guys do
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silasbug · 1 year
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i can start being normal about fictional characters when..??
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eeveearoace · 2 years
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Favorite amphibia character?
uhhhhhhhhhhhhh *quickly hides everything i own with marcy on it* haha marcy wu? who's that?
seriously tho, she is The Blorbo(tm) and i will love her til the day i die (which will be never btw since i decided to live forever)
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paint-tastes-ok · 11 months
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as much as i love shuake, i did not draw them all that much i now realize...
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beck-a-leck · 2 years
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Ooh, for the character bingo can you do obi wan kenobi, please?
Let's Play Character Bingo!
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Obi-Wan my precious, my beloved, my blorbo before I even understood the concept of blorbos (even before the term came around) you deserve so much better than the raw hand you were dealt by canon. You suffered so much (and I cannot wait to watch you be completely Devastated in your new show) Your angst is delicious and I feast upon it.
I want to protect you and keep you somewhere safe, even though I know you are completely capable of taking care of yourself to a scary degree of competence because you are an Extremely Piwer Psychic Space wizard.
I can't believe you look Like That. You confuse my aro/ace brain. Stop it!
I did give him a half "everything I like is non-canon" because while there is Plenty of canon stuff I love about Obi-Wan, I've also spent so many years of my life with him being a favorite character of mine I know there are head canons I have made inseparable from the character.
And tho I know he wouldn't be down for marriage. And neither am I for that matter. If there was some entirely platonic way to take that man out of his story and give him a home and a family to return to, someplace safe, someplace where the galaxy is not out to be needlessly cruel to him. Someplace where he doesn't have to worry about the safety of a family. I'd give him that in a heartbeat. Particularly for his life post-order 66.
Obi-Wan deserved so much better, but the canon he is trapped in is exceptionally cruel and he is a helpless victim trapped within the story.
And I am fully aware of the irony in me saying all this, because I am also exceptionally cruel to Obi-Wan in the fic I write, finding new ways to hurt him for the delicious angst 😂
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oughpossum · 2 years
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I hate the discrepancy between my emotions and my brain. Consciously I really don't mind being told to kill myself. I'm like 90% sure it's just a young teen, and if it's actually an adult? Yikes that's just sad lmaoo
But regardless my stomach has been twisted for hours and keeps dropping with panic. My chest is tight and every breath brings a wave of nausea.
It's literally a nobody who I should easily forget. They don't deserve to occupy my thoughts, and yet my shitty fucking body won't. let. it. go.
Someone please wring out my body. Maybe run an iron over my brain and smooth out the wrinkles because I'm poorly designed and have the constitution of a worm.
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gallusrostromegalus · 4 months
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Funky Muguruma Kensei AEIWAM headcanons? Spare serotonins with the blorbos? /j Also what's AEIWAM Mashiro like? She's one of the only characters I genuinely get annoyed by in the canon oof
:)
So the friendship between Kaname and Mashiro is one of my favorite things in the fic so far. Have a spoilerific Scene (Part 1 of ?)
Crickets and Grasshoppers
Scene One of ??? Approximately 7K words Fluff that goes South and won't get (sort of ) better until part 2, warnings for body horror, referenced torture and Emotionally Devastating Betrayal
:)
It was Tuesday November 5th, 1901, Scheduling Day in the Ninth Division and Mashiro was standing in front of the vending machine just down the street from the Ninth, choosing her armaments for the coming battle. 
In other divisions, the actual drawing up of rosters was the job of lower-seated officers and the specific parts of the Division they were responsible for.  Tousen’s friend Komamura has told her once that the 7th Division’s schedule was so predictable, they only looked at the roster once a year when people retired or were hired. A fascinating concept to Mashiro, who listened to Komamura’s tales of the 7th with the rapt fascination of an anthropologist privileged to hear the folklore of distant and largely unknown people. 
The Ninth was… complicated for the sake of simplicity.  Information did not move the same way people did, and while the seventh could pass an inbound soul from the Intake Team to Queue Management to the Registry Office, passing an information project from one subdivision to another was a great way to lose said project. So instead of projects moving from subdivision to subdivision as they reached different stages, subdivisions went from stage to stage, following projects. 
This meant scheduling had to be done every month, but it beat the hell out of a major archive loss or communications failure. 
And it meant that Snackage was in order. 
Mashiro surreptitiously glanced over her shoulder to make sure Captain Muguruma was still overseeing drills in the courtyard, then selected 37 cookies, chips, snack cakes, bottles of pop and juice and other goodies from the machine and paid out of the Division Purse.  
Kensei, bless him, was a deeply honorable man who was so reliable you could set a watch by him and would probably cross actual Hell to help a friend, but he did not understand scheduling, much less the kind of caloric requirements it held. 
-- “You’re just sitting there!  What do you need all that for?” He’d asked her once.
“The brain’s the most expensive organ to run in terms of calories.” She’d explained, rolling her eyes and opening a bag of Barbecue-flavored corn chips. “-I know your brain is a plodding cart horse, but you can’t do scheduling.  You need my thoroughbred racehorse brain, and it needs snacks!”
He’d given up with a disgusted groan of defeat, which was good, because the other reason she needed the snacks would have actually made him snap.  -- Mashiro shoved the snacks into her backpack, checked that Kensei was still distracted by drills, darted back across the street where he might spot her, ran around the back of the division, and jumped up to the third-floor window that had been left open for her. 
“The level of subterfuge this perfectly normal administrative process requires…” Fifth-seat Kaname Tousen groaned from where he was lying on the floor, partially under his traditional low desk. 
“-Is half the fun, you dork!” Mashiro giggled, closing the window after her as she climbed in. “All the autumn stuff is in the shops and vending machines now, and I made sure to get every persimmon-flavored thing they had just for you!” She grinned down at her chosen assistant for scheduling. 
The other purpose for the snacks was Bribery. 
Kaname Tousen was, by Mashiro’s estimation, definitely the smartest person in the Ninth Division, and possibly in the entire Soul Society.  If the world was a fair place, he’d be lieutenant and she’d be fifth seat, but the world wasn’t a fair place and in the week between Graduation with every honor Shin’o academy had and starting as the 9th Division’s 20th seat, Kaname had been struck down with some sort of horrible spinal infection that damn near killed him, made him miss his entire first month and a half of work, and left him with occasional bouts of crippling pain, like today, when he’d decided to risk worsening Kensei’s already low opinion of him by doing his work lying flat on his back on a hot pad. 
Kaname’s services as a Brainiac were much in demand and his availability highly limited, so Mashiro guaranteed her place on his schedule with confection-based compensation.
“I mean, Kensei’s a mean old sack and that’s not great for the division too, but the spy shenanigans and scheduling snacktime really is like, The Highlight Of The Month sometimes.” Mashiro shrugged, flopping down on the floor beside him and  dumping the snacks out between them. 
“Captain Muguruma’s sense of discipline is intense but very necess- ow. Yeah, that’s not happening.” Kaname sighed, laying back down from trying to sit up. “-He’s a good man.  Difficult, sometimes, but a good man.”
“You’re way too nice for your own good. Here’s the Persimmon castella cakes.” Mashiro grunted, handing Kaname the small package and the payroll notes to read. 
Kaname groped across his desk for a clipboard, attached the payroll notes to it, propped them up on his stomach so they were balanced on the edge of his desk, and laid all the way back down, face pointed at the ceiling rather than the notes.  Mashiro opened up a packet of Amakara rice crackers, watching him with interest as Kaname took off his goggles. 
The goggles were what convinced Mashiro he was the smartest man in the Soul Society.  Kaname had been born totally blind, but he had figured out how to mount a pair of tiny cameras in the frame of a pair of safety goggles, which were connected to… he’d explained that the little bricks behind the opaque white lenses of his goggles contained something like an obscenely long and complicated Kido spell that spotted readable characters, ‘read’ them, and turned the resulting text into words that played out of the tiny “Microphonogram Speech Players or ‘speakers’ “ hidden in the legs of the goggles.  So he could read pretty much anything printed with enough contrast (and decent enough handwriting, Captain Urahara) because his goggles would read it aloud for him.  They were much slower than most people read, and sometimes he had to stop work to “charge” the spell that made them work, but they worked a damn treat, and had the added advantage that Kaname himself did not need to be looking at the thing he was trying to read, only the goggles.
So now he unwound the coil of wire that connected the Kido brick to the microphonogram, placed the ‘speaker’ back in his ear, and set the glasses on his chest so he could read the notes while keeping his back and neck pressed to the hotpad. 
True Genius, that.
“I love how the cameras wiggle.” Mashiro grinned, watching the two lenses shift and dilate as they focused on the notes. “They move the same way cicadas and grasshoppers shift their eyes independently to focus. It’s so clever to have them operate like that.”
“Hm.  That was Kakiyo’s design, not mine.” Kaname smiled.  Kakiyo was his adopted and now-deceased sister.  “She was always more of an entomologist than me.”
“Weird that you ended up with Suzumushi the cricket for a Zanpaktou then.” Mashiro pondered.  She liked Suzumushi- that sword, and her own Musabori Kuu Batta (Devouring Locust) were two of less than One Hundred insect-type Zanpaktou in the court guard, and fewer still that weren’t butterflies. She couldn’t really see Suzumushi- no shinigami could perceive another’s Zanpaktou Spirit- but she could hear Batta’s half of the conversation the two would chirp to each other sometimes.
Kaname paused from opening the persimmon cake packaging with his teeth. “...Yes. Bizarre.” he said, with a rueful finality that Mashiro took as her cue to change the subject.
“Right. Where are we on the Agricultural Practices census?” She sighed, pulling the active projects list and next month’s calendar out in front of her. 
“Maegawa-san has requested travel permissions to-” Kaname replied, flipping through the pages, the goggles faintly reading off names as he tracked them with his fingertip. “Ah, ‘pull the damn report out through the East 36th Daimyo’s nose if I have to’, which I think we can call a requisitions expense rather than reconnaissance. Unless you think Lieutenant Fon would enjoy the catharsis as well.”
“She WOULD, actually, that girl is wound tighter than my grandpa’s pocketwatch.”  Mashiro nodded, placing the card for “3rd Seat Maegawa” in the “Out Of Office” Pile. 
And so it went for a pleasant hour, eating snacks and solving the five-dimensional time, space and payroll puzzle of scheduling, with Kaname helping her keep track of the process and who was not supposed to be doing overtime or couldn’t be trusted to work with someone else or on maternity leave or whatever. 
“Alright, I think that’s nearly everyone sorted…” Mashiro muttered, going down the list of all 200 division members to make sure they’d made it onto the roster. “Oh wait, we didn’t put you down!” She giggled. 
“I believe my schedule should be identical to last months while we are still doing data entry into the archives, but I do have a request- May I have this coming Friday off?” he asked. “I have an engagement.”
“Who’s getting engaged?” Mashiro teased, erasing him from the roster that day.
Kaname tilted his head a bit, pointing his ear at her with a conspiratorial smirk. “...Can you keep a secret?”
Mashiro blinked at him in surprise, then gasped with delight and leaned in  “Cross my heart and hope to die!” She whispered back, giggling. 
Kaname regarded her for a moment, teasing. “Love- Captain Aikawa has finally worked up the nerve to propose to Lieutenant Yadomaru.”
Mashiro made a noise like an asthmatic teakettle as she tried to not shriek with delight and deafen Kaname as well, rolling onto her back and kicking her legs in the air with excitement.
“-He wants it to be a surprise though, and Lisa is always going through his bag for his water bottle or whatever at kendo practice and she will notice if his schedule changes, so I need to duck out during lunch today and pick up the ring for him to propose with on Friday.” Kaname elaborated.
“A conspiracy!” Mashiro balled her fists with excitement. “When? Where? Can I come?”
“You got an invitation to Captain Kyoraku’s next moon-viewing party, right?”  Kaname asked and she nodded.  “It’s then.”
“EEEK!” Mashiro giggled with delight. 
“What’re you two giggling about?” Kensei grunted from the doorway, still sweaty from training. 
“It’s a SECRET!” Mashiro glared imperiously, sweeping the snack wrappers out of sight off the desk as Kaname sat up with a small grunt of pain and bowed his head in salute.
“Whatever.” Kensei rolled his eyes. “Tousen. Read your report on the dodgy census statistics and possible disappearances in West 66 and I think you’re right.  Something stinks on ice out there.”
Kaname gasped sharply with relief and bowed his head in gratitude. “Thank you, Sir.”
“I gotta attend a captain’s meeting this afternoon because Urahara has some harebrained new project to show and tell-” Kensei continued, glaring at his battered fingertips where he’d caught a bokto the wrong way during training. “-Saw that Maegawa is gonna be in East 36 and Fukuda’s on maternity leave, so I’m sending every seated officer from you to 15th seat Shizawa out there to investigate and deal with it.  You all need to be at the Kido Corps for teleportation at three. Mashiro, don’t burn the place down.”
“OH COME ON!” Mashiro shouted with disappointment. 
“HEY! No backtalk!  I know you wanna go but someone’s gotta hold the fort-” Kensei glared down at her. 
“It’s not me!  Kaname has to- I mean-” She sputtered, abruptly remembering his request for secrecy.
“It’s alright!” Kaname tried to smile but ended up grimacing at her as he got up. “I’ll just go get it now and it’ll be in my pocket when I get back!” 
Mashiro glared at him for a moment, but sat back down. “Okay. I guess.” She pouted. 
“Get what?” Asked Kensei. 
“A surprise for Captain Kyoraku’s moon-veiwing party!” Kaname grinned at him as he collected his belongings into his satchel by touch.
Kensei pondered that for a long moment, glaring at Kaname. “...How’d you score an invite?”
“Captain Aikawa invited me along.” Kaname explained over Mashiro’s offended scoff. “We were roommates when we were at the academy and he has very kindly kept inviting me along to things despite my not really being able to keep up with him anymore.” 
Kensei regarded him a moment longer. “Huh.” he eventually decided. “Well, see you when you get back from the investigation.” He waved, dismissing Tousen.
“Thank you Sir.  Lieutenant Kuna.” Kaname bowed before jogging off. 
“See you later Kaname-kun!” Mashiro called after him.
“-Even if he won’t technically see yo- OW!” Kensei yelped as Mashiro clipped him sharply under the ear. 
“Why are you so MEAN to him!?” Mashiro glared up at her captain as he rubbed his jaw. 
“I’m not mean! I’m just- it’s just office banter!” Kensei growled back. “I can just not like a guy and still be colleagues with him, okay?”
“No, apparently you can’t!” Mashiro “You’ve been really hard on him and getting on his case and teasing him since day one!”
“-More like day thirty-two, he missed the first six weeks of his appointment.” Kensei grumbled.
“That was literally FIFTY years ago and he was in the HOSPITAL. BECAUSE HE NEARLY DIED!”  She bellowed, probably loud enough for Kaname to hear in the street but it didn’t matter. “Yeah, it sucked, but it wasn’t his fault! I don’t get why you were mad at him back then, and I really don’t get why you’re still mad about it NOW!”
“I’M NOT MAD ABOUT THAT, I JUST-” Kensei bellowed back but then stopped, hand over his mouth. “...He keeps secrets.”
Mashiro stared at him blankly for a moment, face slowly collapsing from bewilderment into disgust. “OH. MY GOD. You’re the one always going on about operational security!  He’s just careful- all the details are in his summarial reports, if you ever read them…”
“I do!” Kensei barked. “And they’re-  I mean, All the information he’s required to fill out is there, and then some.” He sputtered, deflating. 
Mashiro leaned in close, eyebrow cocked at him. 
“...But I keep getting this feeling it’s not the whole picture.” Kensei muttered. 
“Ugh!” Mashiro shouted, throwing her hands up and turning away. “So you don’t like him because you have bad reading comprehension?”
“Shut up! I don’t- there’s just something off about that guy! He’s always taking weird days off-” Kensei started, ticking off a list on his fingers. 
“You mean the sick days from his spinal infection?” Mashiro glared, arms folded across her chest.
Kensei continued to count his grievances “-and taking secret calls in weird corners-!”
“You mean privately scheduling his medical treatment? For his spinal infection?” Mashiro continued to glare.
“-And getting him to go to the fifth or third division is like pulling teeth! What the hell is up with that?” Kensei demanded.
“You mean the divisions that have A) Lieutenant Iba, the woman who has a weird horoscope-based personal grudge against him-” Mashiro asked, mimicking Kensei’s earlier counting, “-and B) Lieutenant Aizen, who also keeps forgetting he has a spinal injury and slaps Kaname across the shoulders every time they meet?  Yeah, I don’t blame him for wanting to avoid two of the most annoying people in the whole court guard!”
“Whatever.” Kensei waved her off. “I’m still right. There’s something off with him. Now get that roster updated and posted!”
“Yes, sir.” Mashiro groaned, rolling her eyes at him and stomping back to Kaname’s office for the Roster.
***
Kaname hadn’t felt this light in years. 
Oh god.
Oh, GOD!
Please, please, please please let this be happening?
He sprinted down the road, back towards the apartment that he and Sajin shared, the small box with Love’s ring in his chest pocket.  He allowed himself an ounce of elation- After all, I am just a young man who has picked up the engagement ring of one of his best friends!  It is exactly what anyone would expect to see-
That was the tricky part of The Curse. 
He couldn’t talk about it, like many curses, but it had the added complication that anyone who looked at him- or listened to him, or put their hands on him, or- 
Well, they’d only find what they expected to find. 
Certainly not a curse. 
But curses cut both ways- The broader and less specific a command for someone bearing a curse was, the harder it was to enforce, and it was harder to come up with a command broader and more open to interpretation than “Help Me Kill God”. So as long as Kaname could argue to the curse that an action did “help” some aspect of Aizen’s plans, he could be inefficient, neglect to mention something important, do an assigned task sloppily, fail to cover his tracks and so on-  Sometimes Other times, the curse would take effect and cripple him until he relented and obeyed Aizen’s command again. Or at least, managed to convince Aizen he was doing what Aizen wanted. 
Aizen hadn’t quite realized it, but he was also subject to his own illusions, and there was a gap- a mirror image, if Kaname understood mirrors correctly- so long as he appeared as Aizen expected, Aizen wouldn’t notice him sabotaging Aizen’s machinations. So for the last three years, Kaname had done his best to appear tired and overworked and failing from exhaustion rather than malice, or like he was starting to agree with Aizen, which is exactly what the narcissist expected after fifty years of mental, physical and spiritual torture. 
It was finally  paying off. 
He’d managed to make the kidnappings Aizen and Gin had been conducting on the villagers of West 56 appear by conducting a census that showed the discrepancy of expected versus actual population.  -And made sure the increased hollow activity in the area from Aizen’s experiments showed up in the 10th Division’s monitoring statistics. - And the weird waves of reiatsu visible on the 12th’s monitoring equipment- not what people expected to see, but by keeping all the evidence noticed by unrelated parties, he kept it out of the scope of Aizen’s Illusions. 
Kyoga Suigetsu took a lot of energy to operate, and Tousen was pretty sure Aizen could only passively fool about 150 at a time- he chose mostly his own division and people he saw daily, like his neighbors and cross-division colleagues, and could only actively alter the reality of maybe 20 people at once- the other captains and a few key would-be witnesses.   So a rural census-taker, and two members at the bottom ranks of other divisions weren’t actively subject to the illusion. 
He had to do it on faith, that someone would notice-
Kaname felt like he’d been holding his breath for weeks now, doing his best to tell Aizen and the constantly-itching nails in his spine that this was a Perfectly Normal Database Cross-referencing project- very boring, but it will be missed if it’s not done, Lord Aizen- and nothing to draw attention to the horrible Laboratory…
…By some miracle, Mugurama had read the report, understood and believed it- Kensei had a naturally suspicious mind, so Kaname made sure the report was full of “It's entirely possible this is all a weird coincidence!” to make him suspicious.  The curse only showed people what they expected to see, and for once, Kensei’s natural pessimistic expectations allowed him to see the truth. 
24 hours.  That’s all I have left.
The only people in the Ninth Aizen had under his Active Influence were Kensei and Mashiro, so he wouldn’t be able to hide the nature of the laboratory from the investigation team without dropping the Active Illusion on someone else and risk discovery- and so long as Aizen didn’t find out about the expedition, he wouldn’t know to make that shift in time.
24 hours. I only need to keep Aizen distracted for 24 hours. 
In Aizen’s personal quarters, The Distraction Apparatus waited.
Aizen was mistaken to force Kaname to do his lab work for him- Kaname understood it better than him now, and had pulled aside a little trick to confuse him. The Hogyoku bonded with its user, almost like a zanpaktou, and communicated with them- it purred when Aizen fed it, and whined when it was hungry.  Aizen knew about Suzumushi’s Bankai- he’d insisted Kaname develop it under his supervision, so he would know of all Kaname’s abilities.  But he only knew it from the inside, and hadn’t realized that not only was anyone inside blind, deaf and without any form of sensory input, neither could anyone on the outside sense anyone within. It was worth it to break Suzumushi like that. It was actually her idea, to break the guard of his Zanpaktou and separate the ring from it.  That’s where the Bankai was stored, and with a hell of a lot of practice, he’d learned to cast it remotely.
It had been months before he had an opportunity-  Kaname would never forgive what had been done to that poor angel, but during one of the The Sessions where Aizen was using the Hogyoku to change the angel, Kaname was able to get ahold of the little Illusion box Aizen kept the infernal device in, Secure Suzumushi’s ring to the floor, disguise the tampering with a false floor, and return the box to it’s place without Aizen’s notice. The Ring had been waiting there for months.
24 hours, and the secret will be out. 
He’d memorized Aizen’s schedule- in 22 minutes Aizen would be entering the reiatsu-locked laboratory of the 12th with his own Captain Shinji for Kisuke’s Demonstration, and would not be able to feel Kaname activate his Bankai. When he came back out, it would seem like the Hogyoku had vanished. And for all Aizen would be able to tell, it had- he wouldn’t be able to perceive the Hogyoku or it’s illusion box until Kaname released his Bankai. 
So for now, Kaname acted exactly like Aizen would expect him to act- a little tired, a lot in pain, but elated that two of his best friends were getting engaged, and that he’d be able to help. That was a natural source of excitement, and definitely not any kind of counter conspiracy-
Kaname jogged down the stairs to the apartment, ring box in his pocket, heart hammering, hands shaking a bit as he took out the keys to unlock his door, grabbed the knob that was not there and was suddenly off balance and falling- Into something soft and steady that carefully picked him up like a child’s doll and set him back on his feet, gently taking his hands.
“Are you alright?” Sajin asked, soft, deep voice tinged with concern. “My apologies, I was just trying to do some house cleaning while the weather is mild and had the door open for ventilation.”
“Y- yeah! I’m. I’m alright. Just- distracted. I’ve had some good news!”  He grinned up at his friend. 
“Oh?” Sajin asked, tugging lightly at Kaname’s fingertips to indicate he should step inside.  “Mind your way, I have all the chairs out in the living room so I can sweep.”
They had been living in this garden-level apartment for the forty years since Sajin had followed Kaname into the court guard, and under the same roof at the Akaido City Library for many years before that, and their domestic arrangements settled into a comfortable and comforting routine- Kaname was incapable of seeing grime, so Sajin did the housekeeping, and Sajin would eat raw, expired meat if left unattended, so Kaname did the cooking and shopping. 
Kaname followed his lead, hand reflexively on Sajin’s instinctively proffered arm to keep balance while he unbuckled and took off his boots- the gestures of proximal intimacy had calcified into a secret language between them.
“Thanks-” Kaname stood up and stepped in with a guiding hand on the wall. He could normally navigate the apartment by memory alone. “-I’m only here for a few minutes, I’ve also got a deployment I need to pack for.”
“Deployment?” Sajin asked, following after him, voice slightly muffled from the cloth mask he wore over his face- at least when the door was open.  Being mostly underground had it’s advantages- Kaname didn’t need much light and Sajin possessed almost superhuman darkvision, and the small, high windows that were obscured by bushes gave them enough Privacy that Sajin could relax and keep his face bare at home. 
24 hours.  
Maybe. Maybe when it all came out, and the dust settled--Assuming they don’t hang me alongside Aizen, which was a big If--But once it was all said and done and I still draw breath- Maybe I will have the courage to ask Sajin what it is he feels he needs to hide.Surely, he is far too gentle to be half so monstrous as he claims.
“Kaname?”  Sajin prompted, and Kaname realized he’d been silent for nearly a minute. “S-sorry. I just. Captain Muguruma finally read my report on West 66 and ordered and immediate investigation, so I have to be at the Kido corps by three-” “Kaname.” “Ah, No don’t worry,  I’ll get dinner prepared so you only have to put it under the broiler, and There’s um-” “Kaname.” 
“-I’ll be back by Friday for Love and Lisa’s- Right- Here, I need you to-”  He sputtered, dozens of ideas baying for his attention at once, patting his chest for the ring box- “Kaname!” Sajin snapped, and his giant hands were on Kaname’s shoulders again, turning him around in place to face his friend, gloved hand suddenly under his chin, holding his face up for Sajin to glare at. “...When was the last time you slept?”
“I’m fine!” Kaname tried to jerk back, laughing defensively. 
“You’ve gone to bed after me and gotten up before me, if you went to bed at all for at least a week, and I’m doing maximum overtime. You don't have bags so much as matched luggage under your eyes and can’t finish a sentence coherently.  You’re not touching anything in the kitchen.” Sajin rattled off, giving Kaname’s chin a light shake. “...it’s not yet eleven, and the Kido Corps is less than ten minutes from here. I’ll see to your packing. Lie down. Please.”  
Kaname sighed, shoulders slumping. “Sajin, I- I need to-”
“You need. To sleep.” Sajin rumbled, no room in his voice for argument.
Kaname panted for a moment, realizing that if Sajin wasn’t holding him in place he’d be swaying with exhaustion. 
24 hours.
…I can spend one or two of them resting. 
If I don’t manage to prove my innocence, I’ll want to have at least this to think about on the gallows.
“...Stay with me until I fall asleep?” Kaname asked, voice soft. “It’s just. It’s been a lot.” “Of course.” Sajin hummed, rubbing his cheek. “I also need to, ah- use facilities, first.” he grimaced, and Sajin let him go. 
“I’m coming in after you if I think you’ve passed out on the floor.” Sajin threatened. 
“That happened ONE TIME-!” Kaname protested, following the wall to the bathroom.
Once inside, he checked the time again. 
If the meeting had stuck to schedule, they should be inside the 12th’s labs now.  
Kaname sent Aizen a test message to his Soul Pager. 
> Mandatory Status Report: Muguruma handed me a sudden assignment. Won’t be back until Friday.
If he was outside the Reiatsu-locked lab, that missive would have Aizen furiously calling him in under five minutes. He timed it, relieving himself and washing his hands as he waited-
Nothing.
“Here goes…” he muttered, hoping the sound of the bathroom fan and the running water would cover his voice. He focused, feeling the silver ring start to rotate in his mind, the way it multiplied and stretched, the rings dancing a circle on that which needed to be concealed-
“-Bankai.” He whispered, skin tingling- 
-And suddenly he was keenly aware of the hogyoku and it’s illusion box, as though he were holding it, both wholly contained and hidden by his Bankai.  
It is done The distraction is set. In a few hours, all will be revealed to the rest of the court guard. There. All I need  to do now was follow the assignment like I was told and investigate the- the-
-He suddenly he felt the Bankai’s draw on his power and he collapsed over the sink, retching and knees shaking with how weak he felt. The skin on the back of his neck prickled and almost tasted like vinegar in the back of his mind,  high-pitched ringing between his ears. 
The nails sizzled ominously but there was no power behind it- It’s alright- I can- I can deal with this. Just breathe, come on dumbass, you just need to keep breathing for another 24 hours.
“Kaname? Sajin called.
“Nothing broke!” Kaname called back, forcing himself to his feet and stumbling back against the wall.  He tested the Bankai again- It holds. Very convenient of you Suzumushi, that I only need to cast and feed it, rather than concentrate…
Suzumushi chriped distractedly, her focus on maintaining the Bankai. With her concentration, the illusion would hold even as he slept. Cold water on his face and neck, trying to make himself vaguely presentable and the room stop spinning as he stumbled out- oh, Sajin is right here, how thoughtful of him…
“It’s alright, just follow me…” Sajin soothed, guiding him along to the Thick Futon and large collection of pillows they used as a couch- nothing with legs would bear Sajin’s weight for long. He allowed Sajin to pull him down, settling beside Kaname until he was wedged between Sajin’s giant body and the collection of cushions, head on his friend’s chest, listening to his heartbeat- A little slower than mine, and steady- always so steady- so- 
Kaname was asleep before he completed the thought. 
---
Scene two: 23 hours later
“It’s just up this way Mister Shinigami!”  The boy said, his hot little hand pulling Kaname along. 
They’d gotten to West 66 and Kaname had realized he’d been wrong to worry about looking like he already knew the way to the Laboratory- Iruka Village had taken some fairly extreme defensive measures against the kidnappings since the last time he’d been forced out here- Barricades errected, bridges taken out, and even the road torn up and replanted to hide the route to the village. Kaname was entirely turned around before they even set foot in the Village and started asking the peasants if there was anything unusual nearby.
Fortunately for the expediency of the investigation, one Young Shuuhei Hisagi was extremely eager to help, giving them a detailed accounting of the strange activities at the old foundry, where someone had turned one of the kiln’s back on and there was “An ‘lectric” generator and it smelled a lot like someone was cooking rancid pork but he’d never seen anybody there, even when he went into the basement because he wasn’t ascared of it, weird that there’s a basement, nobody makes basements here as it’s a swamp-
Kaname felt his skin go cold when he realized the boy had somehow gotten inside and made notes and even poked some of the machinery, but given he hadn’t tried to actually chew Kaname’s arm off as he lead the Ninth Division Investigation team to the Lab, he was probably uncontaminated…
“There’s a hill an’ it’s on the other side- mind the branch.” Young Shuuhei was one of the great tragedies of the poor parts of the Rukongai- whip-smart and observant and thoughtful, but illiterate from the lack of teachers, and likely destined for an early grave if the statistical average lifespan out here held true.  His Reiryoku shimmered at the edges- with a little training and a better diet he might even make for a good Shinigami. 
Maybe if I live through this I can get him a scholarship.  Kaname mused, trying to think about literally anything but the nauseating familiarity of the smell creeping over the hill. 
“Mr. Hisagi?” he asked in the polite voice he’d cultivated as the Head Librarian to indicate to children he was taking them very seriously.
The Boy snapped to attention. “Sir?”
“Thank you for leading us here, but I absolutely cannot allow you any closer. It’s extremely dangerous here-”  he started to explain.
“I been in before! An’ the door’s trickylike you gotta pull the handle up and in and rattle it to get in and then prop somethin’ in the gap or it locks back behind you-”  Shuuhei explained, gesturing  like Kaname could see him demonstrating. 
“-And you were lucky to get out in one piece! I also need you to do a very important job.”  Kaname sighed, familiar with this kind of kid- slightly too bright and kind-hearted for his own good, but reliable at a task- “-I can hear that some of your friends have followed us from the village.  They’re about a quarter mile behind us-”
“Dangit Suichi-!” Shuuhei muttered under his breath. “-Yeah that’s probably my little brother and his friends. You want me to go chase him back home?”
“Precisely. Also, tell everyone to get indoors and stay put until they get an all-clear.  Just in case something goes wrong, I need everyone to stay safe until re-enforcements arrive.  So go get everyone back home and inside, alright?” “Yessir!” Shuuhei snapped a salute and Kaname heard some of the other Shinigami giggle behind him.
“I’m glad I can rely on you.” He nodded, and shooed Shuuhei down the road. The boy took off, hollering for his brother.
“I didn’t know you were so good with kids.” Laughed Sixth Seat Todo Izaemon. “Cute little thing too-”
“Being in charge of the West 51 Children’s Intensive Literacy School teaches you how to get along with them.”  He shrugged. “Alright, I can’t sense anything, but that doesn’t mean danger is not present.  Even numbered seats- go west and approach from the north. Odd numbers, we go east and approach from the south.”
“Sir!” Izaemon nodded, the next ranked officer. 
Kaname approached the building at a crouch, straining to hear- the brief nap Sajin had insisted on and six-pack of illicitly acquired 4th Division “Stamina Supplements” were doing what they could for him, but everything  hurt and Suzumushi’s Bankai was even more draining than he’d anticipated and he could barely sense more than a few feet around him. But he found the door- Shuuhei was right, the Handle was starting to go out of alignment- Up and in, right? Yeah- and when nothing behind it exploded, he cautiously stepped in. 
“Nobody ran out our side Sir!” Izaemon called and Kaname acknowledged him with a nod. 
“What the hell IS this place?” Seventh-seat Akishita asked, looking around the room.  This was the main floor of the laboratory, where the bulk of Aizen’s butchery was done- the whole place reeked of rotting flesh and sulfur- byproducts of the ‘Hollowfication Process’, and Kaname very nearly tripped on a groove gashed into the floor that hadn’t been there last time. 
“That looks like an office or control room up there-” Kaname said, pointing to the partial second story that took up the west third of the building that he REALLY hoped was still there. “-Akishita, with me. Lets see if there’s a schematic or something.”
“Sir!” She agreed. 
Oh good, it is still there. He thought, trying to not pant with pain- oh god, his eyes were burning and spine felt like it was actively dissolving he was so TIRED- He touched his watch, checking the time again. 
24 minutes.  Come on, just a little more-
He got to the door at the top of the stairs, Akishita behind him. 
“Are you alright Sir?”  She asked.
“What?” He jerked towards her. 
“You seem… really off today.”  She frowned. He could sense the shape of her this close, and the way her hand on the hilt of her Zanpaktou. Maybe just resting, maybe not. 
“I- I haven’t been sleeping well. Nightmares.” He gulped. That was actually entirely true.  Still the nails sizzled louder and he winced. “-I -I might need to put in for sick leave when we get back.”
“You really should.  You look awful.”  She nodded, hand off the hilt. 
Kaname nodded, and carefully opened the door into the control room. He felt Akishita turn, making sure nothing unexpected followed them as he stepped in- no traps, but a strange sort of coldness- not a draft, like a there was a block of ice in here-
The door slammed shut behind him. 
“Heya Goggles!” a boy’s voice drawled behind him. 
-Or a snake. 
Kaname froze, skin going cold as Akishita called for him from the other side of the door.
“Gin?” He asked, trying to keep his voice even.
“She’s right, you look like shit!” the boy laughed, activating a Kido seal that barricaded them in the room.  “-Boss sent me to talk to you because the CRAZIEST thing happened at the Captain’s meeting this morning!”
“-Please tell me Urahara’s latest crime against nature maimed him?  I could use some good news.”  Kaname groaned, complaining like usual, like nothing was wrong. There was more shouting from the main floor. He braced himself, feet under his shoulders, feeling Gin’s aura twist as he decided on an angle to strike from.
“Oh nah, Aizen-sama is wrapping things up and planting evidence over at the 12th right now, that’s why I’m here!” Gin laughed. “No, Your Boss Muguruma stopped everyone before Urahara’s demonstration to tell everyone about this report you submitted sayin’ several hundred people had vanished in West 66!  The other haoris were all horrified, I tell ya- Captain Hirako just about shit bricks!  Hollerin’ Aizen-sama’s ear off about it the whole way back to the fifth!”
Kaname gripped Suzumushi’s hilt.
“Oh now don’t be unfriendly!  I even got somethin’ for ya!” Gin laughed, and tossed something his way. Knowing better than to catch anything he threw, Kaname waited for it to hit the floor-
PING!
-Stomach turning over as he recognized the metallic chime of Suzumishi’s ring. 
“Neat trick by the way- Aizen must have spent ten hours turning over the fifth looking for the Hogyoku!!” Gin laughed. “-He didn’t actually find it neither, if it’s any consolation. But he has me, and I got…Abilities.” The boy leered as Kaname Swiped the ring from the ground- Suzumushi had been strangely quiet, and only now did he realize that at some point the sensory illusion of his Bankai had been reversed. Louder yelling from the main floor and the sound of Akishita preparing a Hakudo Kido to blow the door in on the other side. 
“-Shit.”  Kaname growled, reconnecting the ring to the hilt, Suzumushi whimpering in pain. 
“Madder than a mosquito in a mannequin factory he is!” Gin chuckled, then surged forward. Even on a good day, Gin was nearly impossible to block and tonight-
“-Sorry goggles, but I got orders. Rikujokoru!” he hissed fingertips on kaname's sternum, and Kanane was slammed to the ground, six beams of Kido energy hitting his middle, paralyzing him completely. “Aizen-sama says if you can get outta this and get home you can live, but if I’m honest, I don’t really like your odds-” Gin explained, walking over to the control panel and flicking it on, the machines whirring to life and something rumbling beneath them. 
…Basement. Kaname realized. The boy said there was a basement- there wasn’t one last time?
There was a loud hissing as vents opened and gas streamed out of the floor into the main room, the sickening scent of rotting fruit comingled with melting plastic- The Hollowfication Compound? It’s a gas now!?
The shouting turned to screaming.
Oh God.
The screaming turned to roaring. 
Oh god, no. Please-
“- 'Specially not now.” Gin leered, patting him on the shoulder as he turned to leave. “Bye-Bye!  See you tomorrow-! …Maybe.”
Kaname could hear Gin leaving out the small fire window up at the roofline and he struggled, concentrating his reiatsu in his mouth to speak the counterspell- “-Horses of wind and gale, river of thread- 
-Akishita screamed in the hall, and there was the terrible wet sound of tearing flesh and breaking bones-
“- By Shadow and storm, unbind me!” He hissed, and the spell dissipated with the loud sound of shattering glass. Kaname scrambled to his feet, standing up in time to feel the gaze of ten newly-turned hollows fall upon him. His watch pulsed against his wrist, the timer for 24 hours Going off. 
“Well. I did say it would be over one way or another, didn’t I?” He grimaced, drawing Suzumushi as his former colleagues charged the plate glass that separated them. 
---
Part two approximately whenever I finish it :)
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impishtubist · 2 months
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Some posts talking about Sirius and Remus:
Remus was a flawed character. He was soooo grateful to dumbledore, and never dared to bother anyone ever with his own problems, and deeply loved his friends even after they treated him like trash, poor and disabled, and that's why we love him!
Sirius was an asshole who never grew past his teens and caused the death of everyone, and tried to use his friend as amusement and a murder weapon, while also abusing his house elf
Yes these are comparable and fair in my mind
Yeah, my least favorite Sirius take is that he's reckless and irresponsible. It's brought up in canon by Molly and Hermione (Hermione even uses it to try to justify his death!), but the most heartbreaking one for me (and probably why this fanon exists, tbh) is where Harry thinks he's as reckless a godfather to Teddy as Sirius was to him. And we all KNOW Sirius wasn't reckless and irresponsible, but of course that's how Harry sees it, because he's grieving and hurt that Sirius left him.
Another Sirius take I hate is that he never matured beyond 21, and Remus is SO mature and wise compared to him. That is not supported at all by canon. Who wrote to Harry diligently throughout GOF and gave him advice? Who told him NOT to do reckless things like going into the Forest? Who lived in a cave and ate rats just to be near Harry? Who had the wisest advice and insight re: Karkaroff and Snape and Dumbledore and Fudge and Crouch?
Sirius had to grow up real fucking fast as a teenager living in an abusive household, and then again as a young adult fighting a war. Being stuck in wizard torture prison for 12 years does NOT mean that his maturity got stunted, omg. That's just a lie the Remus apologists like to perpetuate bc it makes their poor innocent long-suffering blorbo look better by comparison.
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the-puppet-bracket · 5 months
Text
Spamton propaganda:
"You know someone had to do it.
This guy's whole thing is not wanting to be a puppet anymore, but uh-oh-spaghetti-o! Dude now has physical puppet strings!"
"Making a [SPECIL] deal by placing his [#1 SALE SYSTEM] into a [CLASSIC!] body, Spamton believed he could be more than [HYPERLINK BLOCKED]. But the strings told him otherwise. He lunged at Kris in [LIMITED TIME OFFER], trying with all his [50% OFF!] to be more than a puppet."
"Spam email bot who was exposed to something that drove him mad and he spent the whole rest of his existence trying to cut his strings, only to die (maybe?) when he finally manages it."
"He is the most tortured dumpster man alive. Also, not literally a puppet, but metaphorically!!! There's some mysterious outside force controlling him and limiting what he can say and god, he desperately wants to break free, trying to kill the protagonist (his only friend in years) for the chance of ""being let loose from his strings"". In his secret boss battle, he thinks he'll be free after getting a new body but he isn't, as his new powerful body has literal strings attached. You fight him, because he thinks your soul (long story) will gain him access to freedom. During the pacifist route of the battle, you cut his strings until there's one more left, he's ecstatic, being able to break free from the narrative of the confines of the game. He decides to break his own last string, and he falls to the ground into pieces. It turns out he relied on the strings after so long, and couldn't recover without them. Afterwards, he's deshevaled, hung up by vines in the dark basement that resemble his old strings and he says ""It seems after all I couldn't be anything more than a simple puppet."" This ties back to how Kris, the protagonist of the game is feeling the effects of being controlled by the player and really shows the core focus of the game and it's characters. And that's why I entered him into this poll!
Also he is genuinely so fucking hilarious bro just play Deltarune already what the fuck are you doing the chapters that are out rn are free dawg (play Undertale first though, it's like ten bucks or something you'll be fine)"
"Spamton best blorbo. Very good blorbo. Exquisite blorbo even. He's sad and adhd and insane and weird and I love him and you should too. Pipis"
"he spamt"
"[[NUMBER ONE RATED SALESMAN 1997]]"
"he's living in a goddamn garbage can. let the big shot win. it'll be funny. does he deserve it? that is up to viewer discretion. but he is our beloved tumblr sillyman and as such we need to pay him respect in some manner. <3
(iirc spamton is a puppet? probably. oh well if he doesn't count ignore this i'm not read up on
my deltarune)"
"frankly i'd be surprised if he's not one of the most submitted. anyway his whole Deal is about being a puppet and having other things control him and so he seeks to regain that control through either manipulating the player into murdering half the city or to take the red soul and use it to become a god. yet in his super powerful NEO form he still has strings attached to him (that he won't even notice if he succeeded in the player manipulation thing) and in either case he ultimately becomes an item you use just for stats. guy really isn't a fan of puppetteers"
"you propably knew this was coming lol
Tumblr's favorite awful little puppet desperately fighting to get rid of his strings
the pinocchio references are strong in this one
HA HA HA ... THIS POWER IS
FREEDOM.
I WON'T HAVE TO BE JUST A PUPPET ANY MORE!!!!
...
OR... so... I... thought.
WHAT ARE THESE STRINGS!? WHY AM I NOT [BIG] ENOUGH!? It's still DARK... SO DARK!"
"Tries to become a real boy, ends up as another puppet look guy. He's shady, he's a scammer, he's got cringefail swag and I love him"
"He's just a little fucked-up little guy"
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What about a living doll whumpee? Being dressed up and played with against their will
there is actually a movie with this exact plotline (and also that one episode in American Horror Stories, but the episode was pretty average for me, not bad but not that good either, just okay, so I’m not gonna talk about it here), the movie in question happens to be one of my favorites too. it’s a 2018 psychological horror film, titled Ghostland (or Incident in a Ghostland) and it’s so underrated, so disturbingly good with a great plot twist. though the film has several graphic scenes that can be triggering, so I suggest you googling what they’re roughly about and what type of content you may be exposing yourself to first, if you haven’t seen it and wish to check it out.
as for what my opinions on living doll whumpee are, I must admit I wasn’t familiar with the concept until, well, until I first watched Ghostland. and now I think it’s a very neat concept that is also underrated. I would love to see more of it, and would love to explore more of it myself when/if I got the chance (don’t worry, I’m not gonna turn in-real-life people into dolls lol, what I mean is that I might write something where my favorite character goes through something like this, now that you’ve mentioned it and reminded me of the concept… it sure would make a lovely and quite unique way to torture a blorbo). so yeah, my opinions on it would be: very cool, very nice, very delicious. no kidding, imagining my own blorbo getting turned into a living doll is giving me whumperflies right now. 100/100 I will always have a soft spot for this trope.
anyway, here are some cool glimpses of Ghostland:
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