I’m just thinking about that one scene in Coattails (chap.9 I think?) where Ciel just points a gun to Sebastian’s head and orders him to silence the gun and then eat the bullets, which he does. And I just can’t that scene is just so perfect.

Stu w/ a hyperfemine reader

Stu Macher x reader

Author's Note: I'm trying a newwwww style <3 I think that having stuff like this being a mix of headcanons and scenes! mini fics and such. lemme know what you guys think and I hope you like it love! Thanks for being my guinea pig lol

Request: i’m hyperfixating on scream cuz 6 just came out and your list says you write for it so can i plz request stu macher x hyperfeminine!reader fluff like they’re kinda opposites attract type thing idk lol 😊😊

Meeting Stu in the typically girly girl attire with that perky smile on your face was like sending him straight over the moon

He watched you, eyeing you up and down, curious and over telling

You weren’t even talking to him but it was like you were there for him. Or maybe he was just being obsessive. He was probably just being obsessive. 

Stu was the kind of guy who dated someone for fun, because he knew that it worked within a friend group or because of sheer popularity. It was usually never because he loved them. 

Though lets be fair. The first time he saw you he was not thinking about love. There was something so dear to him about your eyes lighting up as you cheeirly moved about the friend group

You seemed to be a friend of Sidney’s, which worked well in his favor. After things ended the summer before with Tatum Sidney had all but forgiven him for their little fling

Maybe, if Stu tried hard enough…Sidney could give him the number of her friend. You. He wants your number. He should probably ask Billy who could probably ask Stu. 

Lots going on in his brain <3 so much <3 

Him getting you alone for the first time is such a fun little time it’s so good

His smile widened as he approached you. Now that Sidney and Billy had left he could talk to you by himself, without her getting in the way. You were sitting on a fountain near the school, still smiling from the goodbyes you had given to your friend. He scooted closer to you. 

“I don’t think I’ve seen you around here before,” he said, nudging your side. You rolled your eyes. You knew of him. Sidney had told you plenty. Though his eyes were alluring and you were all too happy to oblige that look. 

“I think you have,” you promised. 

“I would’ve remembered.”

“I’ve been Sidney’s friend forever.” 

“Well I’ve been Billy’s friend forever. Not Sidney’s,” he explained. You narrowed your eyes at him, a smile on your face. He pointed at the skirt you were wearing, a fluff of pink at the bottom. “That’s pretty.” 

You noted that he said pretty. He didn’t say cute or girly. You smiled gratefully. 

“Thank you Stu. I like to flaunt my femininity.”

“I love flaunting femininity.”

Dating Stu is like…there’s always gonna be someone touching you. Even when you think he isn’t in the room BOOM there’s Stu and his hands on your sides

He loves everything about the hyperfemininity. He would play into it as much as you let him. He would buy you things you desired (while also being fully aware he’s being a bit of a dick when he points it out) 

He probably makes awful jokes about your femininity linking to your ‘natural woman desires’ 

He made one joke about cooking and cleaning and you hit him with your bag. 

He was very offended. He also didn’t really wanna mention it again (so he didn’t thank goodness) 

Sidney didn’t particularly like that you were together but she didn’t hate it either

She thought your energies matched rather well (she was unaware that Stu Macher could kill someone in cold blood)

But the high intensity of Stu always needed someone who could tame it or feed into it

He found that he adored your very natural brightness

“Hey Stu?” He had his hand on your thigh but he wasn’t paying attention to you until you spoke. 

“Yeah sweetheart?” You sat on your bed, watching some scary movie he had showed you. You had no quarrels with it but you weren’t truly watching it. He always seemed enthralled and you could usually flip through a magazine unbothered but still together, a quiet understanding. 

“Are you aware that you’re cuddling my little piggy?” He squinted, not sure what kind of joke you were making until he noticed he was cuddling your actual stuff pig. It was fluffy and large enough to be a pillow. 

He didn’t move away when he noticed. In fact, he pulled it closer to his chest with his arm that wasn’t on you. 

“Not your piggy anymore.”

“Stu!” You reached forward to grab it but he pulled away, now clutching it with boht hands. You giggled. You attempted to reach around him but with laughter he fought you off. You giggled together until you were laying on top of him, the pig between you. 

He made a pouty face at you. 

It usually caused the both of you to be the life of the party

Billy thinks it’s rather annoying. Double annoying for the plans that he has for Stu and him 

Whenever Stu was with you it was like it never mattered, what Billy had planned

Well he still wanted to kill someone

But that was beside the point. He wanted to hang out with you and live his life with you. He didn’t quite know what he would be without that. 

You caught glimpses of that sometimes, when his face drifted off or when a joke Billy made landed a little wrong

But he never made it seem too overt

He was always more willing to talk to you about other things. Compliment your outfits, exist within the constraints of your room or his

It was actually really sweet <3 

Always the boyfriend (even if he’s the boyfriend who always has a stupid reason to kill his gf i guess!)

“Sweetheart. You’re a sweetheart.” 

“Thanks Stu.”

“You are. You’re my sweetheart.” 

“Oh Stu.” 

He looked down at you, poking your nose, smiling brightly, eyes narrowed in adoration. 

“You look really good in pink.”

Ohhhhh I’ve never even heard of Batman forever!! But he does look fiiiiiineee I know what my new hyperfixation is going to be, I’m so serious. It’s so hard to keep track of all the different variations of Batman 😭😭

A handy-dandy guide to all the (live-action, cinematic) Batmen

Tim Burton’s Batman

Batman (1989) - played by Micheal Keaton

Batman Returns (1992) - played by Michael Keaton

The originals; beloved and nostalgic for a lot of people. Took Batman from kinda goofy and kiddish in the media, put some darker tones on screen. A little basic thematically and cinematically by today’s standards and doesn’t follow now well-know parts of the character - batman kills in these movies for instance. Still iconic soundtrack by Prince.

Joel Schumacher’s (RIP🙏🏾) Batman

Batman Forever (1995) - played by Val Kilmer

Batman and Robin (1997) - played by George Clooney

While technically, in the same universe, as the Tim Burton movies, after Batman Returns, was criticized for being too dark for child audiences of the time, Joel Schumacher was bought in. And with a very gay 80s director, came Batman movies that were universally panned for being overblown, camp, and childish. They still get clowned and memed on today, but they’re cult classics now though thanks to some pretty popular, YouTube reviews that reveal a lot about their story and production history - Batman Forever is my favorite of all of them. Also, great theme song: Kiss from a Rose by Seal.

Sidenote: the only movies to feature Batgirl and Robin

Christopher Nolan’s Batman

Batman Begins (2005) - played by Christian Bale

The Dark Knight (2008) - played by Christian Bale

The Dark Knight Rises (2012) - played by Christian Bale

The big ones. The Nolan Trilogy. Definitely the most popular. Brought the character back from its then camp and admonished reputation by making it a lot darker, a lot grittier and a lot more realistic. Being the first Batman to use digital cameras and having an Academy Award winning performance by the late great Heath Ledger as the Joker made these movies insanely loved. If you weren’t there, I can’t even explain to you how big they were.

Zack Snyder’s Batman (aka DCEU)

Batman v Superman: Dawn of Justice (2016), Suicide Squad (2016), Justice League (2017), Zack Snyder's Justice League (2021), The Flash (2023)

all played by Ben Affleck

Don’t think about it. I hate it. We’re moving on.

Matt Reeves’ Batman

The Batman (2022) - played by Robert Pattinson

The most recent, incredibly critically acclaimed, the first good Batman in a decade. My second favorite of all of them. Somehow, even darker, grittier and more realistic than the Nolan trilogy.

BONUS:

Kevin Conroy’s Batman

The actor responsible for voice acting Batman in basically every piece of animation from the 90s to about the 2010s. Beloved by all, may he rest in peace.

Adam West’s Batman

The campy 60s show. It’s silly, but it still has the best Catwoman and the scene where Adam West has to play Bruce Wayne calling Batman on the phone is criminally good acting. Again, rest in peace.

Teenage Wasteland

On the sixth day of Tropemas, hyperfixated-gvf gave to me:

A steamy Christmas Resort meet cute with praise kink!Sammy!

Christmas Song Pairing: “Snowflakes of Love" by Toni Braxton

Trope: Christmas Resort

~~~

Pairing: Sam Kiszka x Reader

Warnings: Language, smut, praise kink

Words: 2.8k

Author's Note: Sorry it's late tonight... I had such a fierce craving for melted cheese that I grappled with myself about ordering some cheese sticks forever before I gave into the craving, and that took some time off my hands. Whoops! Here you go, though, and I hope everyone who's planning on watching the concert tonight has fun!

18+ / MINORS DNI

~~~

If there was ever a time that you were glad your mother seemed to have partied herself into someone else’s bed, it was now. Because somehow, someway, you'd managed to party the sexiest man you’d ever seen into yours. And if there had been someone in your shared room, you wouldn’t have his lips at your throat, his hands sliding up your dress to your breasts, or his rock hard cock against your hip as you tugged him into the room.

And that would have been the biggest damn tragedy you’d ever experienced.

“Thank god she’s not here,” you sighed, leading him to the bed in a way you hoped didn’t reveal just how desperate you were to feel him on your skin. “We’d have had to fuck in a storage closet if she was.”

He chuckled, precisely undoing what few buttons were connecting his shirt, and then gently put his hand over yours as you struggled with your dress zipper. “I’d have done it anywhere, anytime. All you had to do was say the words,” he purred, taking over for you. 

 Sam. He’d said his name was Sam.

…

Being pushed into a stranger’s arms was something that had its merits, at times. Like in movies, where a strong, sexy firefighter catches you as you’re pushed into the street. Or when it was a billionaire playboy just destined to fall for you.

But when it was very reminiscent of a scene from “High School Musical,” and all eyes were on you as the DJ felt the need to point out that no one had asked you to dance as the clock counted down to Christmas – no. This was not one of those times.

The only thing keeping you from bolting the second attentions were turned away was the fact that the man you’d been pushed into was one of the most beautiful creatures you’d ever been close enough to touch. 

That fact was the one that had you chuckling, uncharacteristically hesitant, as your partner moved into position, fumbling a little bit with hand placement at first but quickly getting into the swing of things. “Um…sorry that you were pressured into this, it was a real dick move of the DJ,” you scoffed, voice a little small and insecure.

But the man just stared at you, confusion twisting his mouth into a slight smile. “What are you talking about?” he asked, his voice happy and welcoming and warm. “The DJ’s my main man Danny – I asked him to do this.”

You felt your face heat under the festive red and green spotlights swinging around the room. “Wha-- wait, really?” 

Doubt poured out of every pore in your body, it seemed, and the handsome stranger took his hand from yours to cross his heart. “I’m being totally serious. I couldn’t let a pretty thing like you walk away without a partner,” he flirted, coming in close enough that you could smell his cologne.

'Expensive' was what it smelled like.

“Well,” you responded, relaxing a bit in the lowering tensions. Something about this man was strangely comfortable. “Here I am, stranger.”  There was no harm in flirting back a little, right? It was one of the last days you had at the resort - you could live what precious days you had left of your teenage years out in true 'teen dream' fashion.

“Hopefully not for long," the man said, leading you around the dance floor in a simple step-and-rock. "My name is Sam, and I think this Christmas, Santa might have actually put me on the nice list for once.”

…

“You work wonders with that little mouth of yours,” Sam groaned, hand laced through your hair as you bobbed up and down on his dick. Every time you hit a good spot with a wet swipe of your tongue, he jerked; not up into your mouth, though – almost away from your mouth. “Don’t make me cum too soon, pretty thing, I have to wrap the gift before I give it.”

You had to pull off to giggle, looking up at him as he grinned down at you. “Your dick’s a gift now, huh? I think,” you said, demurely crawling up his thin body, “that maybe I should be the judge of that.”

Sam’s hands wandered up and down your curves as you kissed him, hot and heavy and deep. It felt like you were finally getting that moment that all the coming of age films put in the minds of impressionable pre-teens: a party, a handsome stranger, a sloppy makeout session, and the promise of more all as you kept glancing towards the door to make sure your Mom didn’t come back.

“Condom’s in my wallet,” Sam panted, breaking away from your red, swollen lips after searching every inch your mouth had to offer with his tongue. After getting up so that he could retrieve it and put it on, he crawled over you, his long, beautiful hair curtaining you both from the impersonal décor of the resort room. “But I bet I can prove it to you,” he said, in what was supposed to be arrogance, you thought, but the slight shake and nervous voice crack gave you the idea that despite his beauty, he either didn’t do this much or was a little bit on the inexperienced side.

When his fingers met your core, though, and delved into you before hooking and stroking like he’d crafted each nerve himself– there was nothing inexperienced about this skill of his at all.

…

“It’s just me, my older sister and my uncle here,” Sam said, lowering himself into the hot tub in just his boxers. Neither of you had wanted to take the trip to get your swimsuits, so you decided to risk being caught and just stripped to your underwear, not even trying to hide the fact that you were both looking as the other took off their clothes. “My twin older brothers were supposed to come, too, but then they– well, it’s not important what they did, but my parents grounded them.”

“Wait,” you said, brow furrowing. “How old are you? How old are they?” You didn’t want to accidentally prey on someone under 18 just because they looked older than you.

Sam gave a little quirk of a smile. “I’m 19, they’re 22. But they weren’t about to tell my mom and dad to fuck off.”

That was a relief to hear. About his age - although you supposed it was also a good thing that his brothers still listened to their parents, too. “It’s my mom and I,” you replied, going back to the original conversation. “Her girlfriends all pitched in and got her and I this trip as a Christmas gift. And my mom needed a vacation.” You thought back to the year behind you and some of the trials and tribulations you’d both gone through, but specifically her, and wondered if they were really something that should be shared with a complete stranger. Especially one who was obviously down for some extended nighttime activities, from how he’d been flirting.

“Something on your mind?”

You blinked back to the present and chuckled, shaking the thoughts off. “It’s nothing. So you said you’re in a band, huh? Any good?”

Sam’s eyes lit up, and you wondered if they’d been successful at all or not – he still loved doing it, so it seemed. “I dunno, ask our Grammy.”

…

As Sam’s hips pistoned in and out of you, you let out a quiet mewl every time he pushed in to the hilt. His breaths were even more labored, and he was panting like a dog into your neck while he pawed at your tits and grabbed at your hips for more purchase, like he didn’t know what exactly he wanted to use his hands for first.

You stood by your earlier theory, that maybe he didn’t have quite as much experience as that cocky facade was there to make you think he did, but the sex was good, he had more than enough length and girth to keep you stretched out and filled up, and you could see your orgasm on the horizon.

So, even though he didn’t seem to need it, you dug into your little box of kinks you had and began to let out praises and encouragement, excited to see what kind of reaction they’d get you. With your lips at his ear, you said, “God, Sam, you fill me up so well. They say if they’re hot, they can’t fuck, but they’ve clearly never met you.”

Sam’s grip tightened on you and he whined, his hips picking up speed. But he was a rockstar; it really wasn’t a surprise that he craved attention and validation from others. He readjusted his position and flipped your around to your hands and knees, slipping and sliding around a bit when he tried to re-enter you from behind. “I wouldn’t be half as good of a fuck if this pussy wasn’t made to take my cock.” He found purchased and didn't hold back like he had the first time.

You groaned and hung your head low, letting your body shake with each thrust into you and desperately hoping that these walls were thick enough for the sake of your neighbors. “Tonight it was,” you agreed, brushing off the fact that you’d likely never see him again after. “Oh shit, Sam, right there– yes, fuck, you’ve got it! Keep hitting me right there and I’ll cum for you,” you promised readily, knowing that you would if he kept catching your g-spot like that. “All over that perfect cock, pretty boy.”

Your plea was low and your promise sincere, but Sam wanted more. “Yeah? How good am I making you feel?” He was shamelessly fishing for more compliments, and you were more than glad to give them.

“Well, I’m about to cum, if that answers it,” you chuckled breathlessly. “Not very many men can make me cum from just their cock alone.”

With a boost of confidence, Sam set his sights on that goal and used your shoulder as a handle to pull you back with, hitting deeper than he had before. It was enough to put you teetering on the edge, and if he could just hold off for a few more well-placed thrusts, you’d fall. “You call me pretty, you make me feel like a sex-god – I don’t know where you’re from, but I’m following you there,” he murmured, his bony, callused fingers digging in harder as his rhythm faltered for a second, then picked up again. 

“You’re so pretty, Sam,” you said honestly. 

He seemed to really like all your affirmations, and this time, they were all true – which wasn’t something you could say for all the men you’d been with. There had been times you praised and flattered them just so that you could get yourself off afterwards, since all men were suckers for compliments. 

Sam, though, hit all your checkmarks and then some. He hummed out something that sounded vaguely like, “More,” but the toll of exertion garbled it.

Either way, you were only more than happy to say ‘more.’ “The most beautiful person I’ve ever seen, and I can’t believe you’re in my bed tonight. The faces you make, even how you–" you were interrupted by a flash of pleasure as he did something with his hips that was no beginner's move, "--how you look fucking sweating– god, I could look at you forever.” Sam’s hips jerked directly into your g-spot then, and it was all you needed to arch your back and gasp, quickly reaching down to circle your clit and extend the orgasm that overtook you. Sam let out a strangled moan from behind you and, with a few more uneven thrusts, buried himself deep inside of you and pulsed, filling up the condom he’d donned. 

As both of you caught your breaths, you shakily lowered yourself down to your forearms and Sam followed, trying to chase the warmth of your cunt that he didn’t seem quite ready to leave, yet. You felt his weight settle on top of you, and the pressure across your body felt…really nice. Like an extra-weighted blanket that kissed your neck and had a hummingbird heartbeat that you could feel where it was pressed to your shoulder blade.

“I’m gonna have to leave soon, aren’t I?” he said softly, dread clear in his tone.

You chuckled from underneath him. “Maybe. But not right now. Right now, you stay right where you are.”

He listened readily, even if he did eventually pull away to take the condom off and hide it in a piece of toilet paper. When he returned, he sat next to you instead of climbing back on top, and you missed his warmth, but you were also tuckered out, and once Sam started trailing his hand up and down your spine, you didn’t know you’d fallen asleep until you woke up, alone in the room.

The door slipped shut – you figured that was what woke up, and the dark shape that turned out to be your mom whispered, “Sorry!” as you sat up, a different name than hers on your lips.

Oh well. It was bound to happen, so you didn’t let the fact that Sam had left without a goodbye keep you from returning to sleep. After you dragged yourself up and to the bathroom, because a UTI was enough to keep you from sleeping again, wrapped in the blanket you’d brought and hoping that your mom didn’t know you were naked underneath it as you passed each other in the room.

…

Considering that you were the one that was supposed to be jumpy after a night out, you found your mom’s behavior strange the next morning at breakfast. Restless, searching, and barely touching her plate, you raised your brows as she acted like a kid on Christmas. Which was apt, considering that it was Christmas. “Are you okay?” you asked, looking towards the door where she’s fixed her eyes.

“Yeah,” she said slowly. “I just…met someone last night?”

A smile spread out across your lips. Because it definitely hadn’t been obvious this morning when she came in smelling like a man, and that thought wiped the smile right off your lips. Because if you could smell her date’s cologne…then shit.

“That’s cool,” you replied mildly. The last thing you wanted to do was give off the impression that you expected anything from her, whether that be a committed relationship or for her to be celibate until she died. She deserved happiness in whichever form it found her, and you weren’t going to let her worry for you ruin anything. 

She smiled, then, real big and genuine. “There he is! Act cool, act cool!” 

“You’re the one freaking out!” you giggled, ducking away with your toast as she batted at you. Turning your head to look over your shoulder in order to see her mystery man, you cocked it with what little neck movement you had left. You didn’t know him, that was for sure. Never seen him before in your life. But something about him was…familiar. 

He greeted you mom with a big smile as well and a smooth kiss to her cheek when she stood up to give him a quick, bashful hug, sneaking in glances at you as she did. “Y/N…this is Joe.”

Not to be taken lightly, you stood up – still shorter than the stranger, but trying to impose your presence by being the first to put your hand out. “Hi, Joe.”

The man looked at you with a glint in his eye that you could have sworn you’d seen somewhere else. The TV? An ad? Who knew, but it was making your eye twitch that you didn’t have an answer. 

“Hello, Y/N – I’ve heard quite a lot about you.” He only grinned at your posturing on him. “My niece and nephew were getting ready in their room when I left, so they should be coming in a few minutes. They’re about your age, I think.” You nodded, still not breaking eye contact with this ‘Joe’ guy. “So that…you know, you won’t have to be stuck in our boring, adult-conversation world.”

Satisfied that you’d at least made him stutter, you smiled sweetly at him. “Right. Taxes and all, huh?” and sat down right as he let out a booming laugh that ended with, “There’s the sleeping beauties! Y/N, my Darling Date,” he said, motioning to your mom, who blushed at the name, “this is my niece, Ronnie, and my nephew, Sam.”

Your head nearly snapped backwards, and your mom moved in to shake their hands – sure enough, it was the beautiful boy who’d snuck out of your room just a few hours before and a girl that shared some of the exact same features that you also picked out on their uncle, and he was grinning like the sun had taken refuge in a puppy dog that had been turned into a human by a fairy or some shit.

While your mom cooed over his sister, you stood up so that you were face to face with Sam. He didn’t take his eyes of yours as he stuck his hand out. “Hi. I’m Sam, and I think Santa finally put me on the nice list this year.”

~~~

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Alsooo i wanted to ask a question (💋)

Looking at your list of fics you're going to write/currently writing, that is an insane amount of stuff!! I'm honestly SO impressed by that, let me just say that. But where do you get the inspiration and motivation to write that much? I wish I could do 10% of what you do tbh

thank you!! it’s honestly an up and down. most of the times when i’m trying to force myself to write i don’t really get far. so i really need that inspiration to keep going.

when i write i mostly listen to taylor swift (obvi) but i do have to set the mood. so if i’m writing something enemies to lovers based i search up a playlist on spotify (sometimes other artists but still mostly taylor swift) that helps me so much to keep on track.

sometimes i need to scroll a bit through tumbler before something comes to mind and most times i’m just a pretty mood depending writer, where i’ll write like 20 words for a wip and then get bored because i’m not in the mood anymore.

it helps so much being hyperfixated on the people i write for! because then i do read other people’s fics and can nail characteristics better. so there was a time when i was absolutely obsessed with lockwood and i put out fic after fic. i still love him as a characters but not as much as i did. so now it’s a bit easier for me to write for theo or mattheo because i haven’t written so much for them yet and i feel like there’s only so much you can write for a character before you have said everything and aren’t inspired anymore.

i think scenery and vibe do take a big part in that! so switching scenes to the wizarding school definitely gives more material to write about again.

also and most importantly: it’s the people that comment and like my stories that keep me motivated. it just makes me so happy to read that i could make someone else happy with something i wrote!! such a crazy thought in my opinion and i will forever be grateful that there are people out there who read what i write!!

i hope i could answer your question and sorry for this absolute madness of words, but i just thought to write it down like it is hehe!

love,

lizzy ❤️

26 Questions about Run at the Cup.

Hi!

Since I just finished off my 33 chapter Arcane/CaitVi Hockey AU fanfiction, I asked folks for any questions that they might have about the universe (or just for me) around the fanfiction. So I thought that I'd pull them all together, answer them in one big post, and then direct folks here.

These questions are mostly pulled from twitter or discord, and are asked anonymously. If you're new to it/have never heard of it, you can check out the fanfiction here:

My asks are always open if you want to pepper me with more questions - I literally love talking about my process and creating stuff. But yeah, let's get the ball rolling!

These questions have spoilers up to the epilogue (chapter 33) of Run at the Cup.

One of your original goals for RATC was to include a sex scene in every chapter, and you later decided that didn't suit the story that it ended up being. How far, exactly, did you stray from that goal?

I think the first disc stuck to the format of smut-a-chapter pretty well, but as soon as I got to chapter 7 and 8 in my planning, I really had to take a step back from the idea of smut-a-chapter. Part of doing that was a friend of mine pointing out that another fic - breakneck - already was a smut-a-chapter offering, and the other part was around chapter 7 and 8 was when we really got a look at the Landsman abuse and I wanted to focus more on telling a story of healing instead of a sexual relationship. It felt the best narratively for Vi to take a step back and appreciate boundaries, and at that point we were 100% of the rails of the original vision. I also had my friend Felix - he drew the art for the fic - point out that the story was way more important than the smut when I complained that sometimes I just wasn’t feeling up to writing smut.

Caitlyn obviously makes a point to never sleep with another hockey player except for Landsman and Vi. Vi rather vocally does not have that rule. Are there any players we see in RatC that she has a history of that nature with?

Ahh, crucially, Caitlyn and Vi both adhere to the rule of no teammates. I actually think both have had flings  with hockey players, but probably not anyone that we spend much time hanging out with. I hint at Sarah Fortune and Vi having a past-tense fling that I never really expanded upon, and at one point I wanted to write some Caitlyn and Evelynn one night stand stuff that never really felt right after I abandoned the whole smut-a-chapter premise.

There are so many characters in ratc, and so many povs, how did you get into each of their heads and give them all their own voice that stayed consistent throughout the story?

So one of my other hobbies - other than hyperfixating on a fictional hockey team - is dungeons and dragons as a forever DM. My rule for creating NPCs is to give them a ‘pillar’ - essentially one solid character trait that I can lean back on when viewing things through their lens. Claggor, for instance, was always trying to teach and never raised his voice. Poppy was always going to be cheerful and loyal. Leona was always serious, except when dealing with Diana. Mylo was never serious, until there was a weak moment. All of those ‘pillars’ helped shepherd me in the right direction - the only characters I didn’t really have a pillar for were the hockey announcers, who’s entire personality can be summed up as ‘hockey announcers’.

When did you realize this was going to become Big™ , or was this all the plan from the beginning?

If I ever knew when anything was going to be big in terms of wordcount, I’d be much more successful at writing. The real time I knew was somewhere in Disc 2 when I had written like 3 10k+ word count chapters in a row. I remember thinking ‘oh, shit, I’m fucked’. What’s crazy about this is that I still feel like I left some story threads on the table - I could write 80k more of just Sumprats shenanigans, easily. In terms of Big as in popularity - dude I have no idea when I knew. I still don't really believe it.

Which was your favorite smut scene to write?

Oh man - hands down the hotel smut scene in the Summer Isles  - though that’s technically cheating, because the smut doesn’t actually happen. But I can see it like a shot in a movie - the slow tracking shot over the discarded clothes with some energetic, strumming guitar over top while we see the bed come into frame, the pan over and continued tracking towards the bathroom - all this evidence of wild sex. If the question is ‘which smut scene that’s actually smut’, I’m going with the phone sex scene - it was good to finally get these characters admitting how much they liked one another.

How did you pick and choose which LoL champions (not from Arcane) you brought into your world? As there are so many available and ones you picked seemed to work so well. Was it 'character is hot/cool and I just want to write them', 'I need a champion that would play hockey/act in x way' or any other way

A variety of reasons! Illaoi was included solely because my wife thinks she’s super hot, but for me it became characters I really liked, characters I could see the personality of, and characters I could ape the kit of in some way. Ahri being charming and evasive, Illaoi’s tentacle-like poke checking, Diana being good in close, and Leona being a hard hitting defender were all nods to the league kits, among others. Basically, when I was filling out the roster and was out of Arcane character slots, I started grabbing characters based on what role I envisioned for them on the team and backfilled from there. I’m glad I did their personalities justice!

I'd love to know, if it isn't a bother for you to explain it, the process behind you deciding each character's position on the ice and skillset. I'm basically in awe of how you took each character from the show/game and made them each a particular type of hockey player. But you might have talked about this already so no worries if it's too repetitive!

It all depended on what I wanted to write for the most part, and I approached it from two angles - what was most interesting for me to write dynamically, as in action wise, and what was most interesting for me to write emotionally, as in what they brought to the Sumprats as a whole. I leaned on a lot of sports knowledge that I’ve accrued over my 31 years around the sun, and figured out what archetypes would be most fun and narratively satisfying to convey. So, as an example - Claggor’s soft and assured ‘we’re gonna get you out’ from the show was a big big reason why I made him an enforcer - the quiet confidence and clear smarts. Poppy being undersized but a major bruiser in the game led to her entire personality and playstyle. Ahri being a winking and confident figure in LoL lore led to her being a flashy and charming person with a lot of scoring - etc etc etc. It came together fairly organically!

If you had to pick another sport as the medium to tell the story, which sport would it be? Ik you were intending on making it a hockey story with lesbians vs a lesbian story with hockey, but do you think the sport and play of hockey specifically were integral to how to told the story/the journey of the characters?

This is such a tough question to answer, because I’m not sure I could’ve told it with any other sport. Hockey is inherently chaotic, and the beautiful thing about it is that it comes down to players - you can have a grand strategy, but sometimes it’s just ‘our player is the best on the ice’ and that’s enough. I think there’s probably a pretty awesome Rugby story in here, maybe - or football/soccer - I can see their roles with Caitlyn as an attacking midfielder and Vi as a sweeper or something, but both of those are far more team focused. Also, hockey is lesser known of the major sports, and I felt like talking about how goofy it sometimes is to folks who might not know about it.

What did you learn during/after writing this that you didn't expect?

Such a good question. I learned that I love writing big casts of characters and I learned that I have a knack for conveying what I see on the page. I also learned that I can tell a story that goes every way possible in terms of POV and style, and that having a bunch of threads to tie up is an awesome problem to have. I also learned that I’m somewhat fragile as a creator, and that taking steps to protect myself from having my feelings hurt doesn’t make me selfish - just makes me human.

If you had to support a team yourself (not including the Sumprats), who would you support and why?

Can you imagine Bilgewater Schooners twitter? Can you imagine how batshit insane it must be? I’d be 100% on board with that franchise.

Why wasn’t there more Grapes content?

You all weren’t ready for it. The world still isn’t ready.

Is there something you wished you could've explored more but didn't get the chance?

So many things. So so many things. This is why RATC is crazy to me in hindsight because I felt like I left a lot of meat on the bone when the fic is like 300k long and is one of the longest CaitVi fics around. SarcastCity and I joked about a whole sequence where Mylo strikes out with a bunch of women, I didn't get into the Evelynn sub-sub-subplot, I barely scratched the surface on MOST of the K/Da stuff that I wanted to do, CaitVi adopted a dog at one point, there was an entire anti-police side of the fic that I just cut because it didn’t really fit into the vibe of the fic (you can still see foreshadowing of it in early chapters), there was originally going to be an entire other side to the water reparations where we’d see grainy footage of Silco and Cassandra arguing about it and that’s how a lot of it was revealed - before I decided to make Powder more of a central figure in the documentary. The entire fic changed in a bunch of little moments. Art is cool that way - it kinda leads ya where you need to go sometimes.

Who was someone that you enjoyed writing a lot that you didn't expect to?

When I put Graves into the fic, I never would’ve expected to fucking love writing him as much as I did. As soon as I wrote his first book snippet, I knew that I needed to stop immediately because if I wasn’t careful he’d take over the entire fucking fic. Second place was every scrap of podcast content - it’s so addictive to write this meta-narrative bullshit about your own world building. It’s just giving you a reason to talk about your own fic in universe and I had to stop myself from writing 13 more Taylor Swiffer sequences. Lastly, twitter was always a blast to get going. Shout out to everyone who loaned me their likeness for that!

You’re a pretty big basketball fan Badger, and knowledgeable at that, is there any reason you chose Hockey besides you also liking it? Like, did you feel the “action” would be better?

There are no sanctioned fistfights in basketball, which was a huge L. In all seriousness, I considered a basketball fic before going with hockey because, while I love basketball with my whole badgussy, hockey has so much more meat on the bone with regard to playstyle and expression. You have hitters, shooters, goalies being weird, you’ve got gum chewing angry people and hockey stadium chants. Hockey is a vibe that I really was excited to convey, and basketball - to me, anyways - has less of a physical aspect to it and it’s a little less entertaining to write about. Baskets happen all the time in ball, but in hockey, a goal is celebrated by everyone on the ice, everyone gets a fistbump, and the action stops while the crowd gets to rewatch it over and over. You don’t get any better than that for narrative drama.

You've talked some about the sumprats superstitions, but who is the most superstitious and what are some sumprats superstitions

Ashe is probably the most superstitious, but all sports players are superstitious to some degree or another - especially hockey people. I think every time Leona tapes her stick up, she has to unwind the first piece once - because that’s the way she did it when she scored her first goal. Claggor probably wears the same style of socks that he had when he was 18. Riven’s skates are a size too small, because she believes it makes her faster. Graves needs Caitlyn to tap his post before every game he’s in net otherwise he won’t play.

What was the hardest part for you, as a writer, to get through?

The entire fic came together relatively quickly, honestly. I wrote it in less than a year and most of the time in big 2-6 hour chunks of my day. I think the most challenging thing from a craft standpoint was the Landsman Scandal - because it had so many moving parts and I was using a character invented solely for that sequence in wewon1, and you needed to like her and buy into her right off the bat. I also needed to balance out how heavy the chapter was with moments that the reader could breathe around - I didn’t want to evoke a desperate, awful thing, but I wanted to inform. It took a few days of serious brainstorming before I got it the way I wanted it, and even then I was making edits in the posting window of Ao3. But in terms of actual hardness to write - the run up to the finals was really tough to get through because I felt like not much was happening narratively and I really needed to work at it to get it where I wanted it. The actual physical typing of the story wasn’t hard, but the games were annoying me a lot - they always felt too slow or sluggish or poorly conveyed. The thing I’m most proud of looking back is definitely the Powder chapter - I wish I had done more of that.

Why is Landsman so hot? Why did you have to make Landsman so hot? Should I speak with my therapist about this?

Oh yes. Immediately.

The story focused on Cait and Vi but as a whole was a story about team dynamics - little pieces like Hot Girl Shit, characters we would consider unremarkable as irl players like Poppy or Mylo, the gradual push of Graves to Ekko as main tendie - that grew into their own stories. Was this a case of supporting cast offering spontaneous great idea opportunities that you went along with, or was it always planned that X character would get X storyline?

I didn’t really set out with these storylines in mind, but one of the things I wanted from the get was this line to be true: “Usually, it’s the people who sit five, six seats from the starting lineup that give you the edge. Our job as leaders is to make sure that when those folks’ numbers get called, they’re ready.” - Vi, chapter 4. I wanted to basically reinforce that idea by having the players grow into something that was stalwart and could be relied upon, and just let the characters kinda swirl around with that idea. I didn’t realise that Ashe would wind up being so important but I kind of fell in love with her as I wrote her game - same goes for Riven’s speed and Darius’ faceoff potential. 

Which supporting character that isn’t Mylo ended up being your fave?

If it’s cheating to say Sevika, then I loved Poppy. Every scene Poppy is in I just had a blast writing, but gum-chewing, constantly glaring, scowling while insisting she’s smiling Sevika really leapt off of my keyboard. If I allow myself to take credit for any one thing, it’s casting Sevika as a coach.

if Vander hadn't died and had become the Sumprats coach instead of Sevika, would Vi still have been drafted by them and how would she have felt about it? 

Woof. It’s hard to see Mel hiring Vander, but say that she did and Vander coached Vi - adult Vi, 32 year old Vi with all she feels towards him - I can only really see it as Vi demanding out. She wouldn’t have the ego to get him fired, but I don’t think she’d be willing to play for him after everything. I also think the Sumprats are nowhere near as good with Vander as a coach - in my head Vander was good enough to drill Vi’s lessons into her head but had no idea how to keep a team intact, and that was Sevika’s specialty - the ‘us vs them’ mentality is all her.

I'd love to hear anything about your writing process. When you do it, how you think and feel about it, etc.

My writing process begins with having a very patient wife who puts up with me being glued to a screen for 6 hours at a time while talking to myself - usually in funny voices or imitating crowd yelling. I also do a lot of my dialogue in the shower where nobody can judge the faces I make - most of Caitlyn’s speech and the podcast dialogue came from me showering and yelling to myself, getting hyped up, and trying to remember lines. I basically do my functional adult tasks with the sequences I want to convey running on my head in a loop, until it’s time to sit down and crank it out. One part of my process that I don’t recommend is that when I sit down to write, I don’t get up until the chapter’s done. For me it’s a straight shot or it doesn’t get done at all - I need the entire flow to work on that one sitting. It has the side effect of my wife watering me and feeding me while I’m glued to banging words out onto a screen, and occasionally I’ll come up for air to refill my water battle and talk to her about her Animal Crossing island or something - anything - that isn’t hockey lesbians, before I go back to my cave.

obligatory question about which scene you were most looking forward to writing

So, chapter 32 was basically in my head the entire time I was writing the fic - everything between chapter 2 and 32 was me impatiently jiggling my leg waiting until I could write the Won’t Back Down song from the crowd. But the more surprising bit was how much I was looking forward to the karaoke scene - I wound up putting it off a few times in the fic until I was finally able to lock it down right after the Landsman Scandal, which felt like a great time to put it - just the idea that we all could use a break - as readers and characters in the story - and then we get one. Also, Pray is a fucking HILARIOUS song and I love that I got to use it.

if caitlyn and vi were to have a dog in this universe, what kind, what would they name it, and what would jinx choose to call it instead

This was actually a cut plot point at one time - the dog adoption sequence. They have a boxer named Bowser who has three legs, and Powder calls him Leonardo because it’s not his name but he squints sometimes like DiCaprio, and one time he ate an entire cheese pizza.

actually, kind of bouncing off my other question, are there any scenes that weren't originally planned that you really like?

Originally, there was no Melvika - it was a Melora subplot. But then I wrote that initial conversation between Mel and Sevika where they meet and Sevika passes her test and I thought to myself ‘oh.’ Every single Melvika moment was unplanned but I loved crafting it, showing this little love story in the margins of the page that was slowly and steadily unfolding.

Did you decide to change any major plot points after you'd started writing?

Two major ones: First and most impactful, there was going to be a riot in the original story that led to the team rallying behind the city - it was going to be this sequence of each of the Sumprats walking into the practice facility saying ‘have you heard, yet?’ that tied in what actually happened. But it felt tonally out of place and I was already really invested in exploring the abuse aspect of the fic, so I scrapped it - it’s a story worth telling at some point but the feel-good underdog sports fic wasn’t the place to explore that space. Another more impactful thing that certainly won’t be surprising to some: Vi’s injury was initially going to be a career ender. When SarcastCity and I started talking around the end of Disc 2, I actually told her that version of the story - that Vi’s knee is busted irrevocably and Caitlyn has to win without her, and the two have to find their way towards one another in a bittersweet finale without hockey to unite them. SC talked me around on that one - made the case that Vi and Caitlyn deserved to play hockey together for years and years, and after thinking about it for a while it really truly felt like I was being sad and dramatic for sad drama’s sake - angst for angst’s sake isn’t something I wanted to play into. So I changed it and it’s a lot, LOT better as a result.

How did you keep everything in order? Did you have an outline?

Calling it an outline is kind of insulting to other outlines, I think - I had an unhinged and fucked up google sheets document that listed the players, positions, and general vibe of their character arc, but I didn’t totally stick to it. I also had a chapter title list that I also changed a lot - I mostly knew my end point was ‘Caitlyn skates for 20 minutes and they come back to win in Game 5 with an injured Vi’ and worked my way to that point.

Thank you to all who submitted questions! If you have more, feel free to drop me a line.

-Badger

Once in a while I’ll hyperfixate on my own aus and I’m like god this would be SO FUCKING GOOD IF I COULD JUST WRITE IT and I’ll sit back down and crank out a chapter if I’m lucky and then lose all ability I have to write and not touch it again for like two months so the specific one I’d love to post right now except when I do write it it’s. It’s not in order. I started in the middle and I now have like the two beginning chapters and I have a bunch of random scenes idk where they’d be yet and I have the end and there’s like maybe ten chapters but like the amount of the au they cover is so small the finished fic would have to be like fifty chapters at this rate. And each chapter is at least 3k words and so it’s like. I have the main shit figured out but it’s so hard coming up with the filler stuff so so it’s just a big block of very holey cheese and I want to post it but I can’t because I don’t have the beginning and I don’t want this specific one to be fucked up and out of order with funky flashbacks or the future as a start or whatever and then it goes back and tells the story like those are cool but this one I’m doing normal but ohh my god else wise I’d post it right now I’m obsessed with it. It’s that venom sib pornodroid au I posted about forever ago where it’s Pois and Kobra in the place of red and blue in the comics and poisons battery is dying so Kobra has to go and try to get a new one but they deny it because poisons an outdated model so Kobra shoots the dracs and just steals a battery and so they were already coming to recycle poison but now Kobra’s also wanted so they run away to the desert where yes they can still functuon they just like get cut off from the bat city internet system or whatever and they have to run off plus instead of like just plugging in like droids can in the city. But they always wanted to be killjoys were just too scared to risk it all try and escape and preferred to wait for destroya to come save them instead. But now they have no choice but they wanted ti be killjoys anyway so it works out and they get to the desert and choose their killjoy names and are exposed to like the culture and the freedom and all the different ways to say fuck you to BLi and learn that you can change more than just your name and poison embraces genderfluidity and kobra was a female model pornodroid but realizes he’s trans so fucking transgender pornodroid hell yeah. Also he figures out he’s a aroace and he really hates his past so he tries to forget about it and a couple months into life in the desert they meet Jet and ghoul because ghoul got shot like an idiot and jets stitching him up in the diner that was the first shelter they spotted and Kobra and poison come back from a concert or rave and find them there and they hang out a bit and become friends and then a crew and after a few months when poison has totally fallen in love with ghoul but lowkey hat themself because they know they’re not human and can never be and that ghoul would hate them if they knew their secret(Pois and Kobra are hiding that they’re androids. They’re so troubled lmao) and that ghoul could never love them bc they’re not human and they also don’t want to be used or seen as what he was seen as in the city which was a tool and a product not a person. So they’re terrified and so is Kobra but poison gets shot one day a few months into being a crew and tries to hide it but his systems are trying to shut off because they register the injury and he wants to get back to the diner to fix themself but of course ghoul notices that he’s hiding pain and he’s like are you hurt and poison holds out until they get to the diner but then ghoul grabs their wrist and is like I KNOW you’re hurt let us help you let me help you and poison tries to convince him he’s fine and he makes knowing he contact with Kobra who defends him but sounds like an asshole bc he’s like leave them be when they’re obviously not fine and ghoul won’t let him go but poisons blacking out and crying and his systems shut off right there in the foyuer and everyone freaks the fuck out

and Kobra has to take over the situation and fix poisons damage and when they come back online everyone’s like silent and staring at them and they’re fine and they’re like yeah I’m. Im a droid. And Kobra’s like we both are because if they’re going down they’re going down together. But of course ghoul and Jet are amazing and don’t care they’re the same killjoys they’ve come to call their crew it doesn’t matter where they came from they have feelings and shit just like everyone else. And its all okay and ghouls still freaked out because surprise surprise he’s also like madly in love with poison and is now torn becuase of this so when poison rests some more he goes and chainsmokes on the roof and thinks over but finds he really doesn’t care what poisons made of and when poison wakes up and goes up there just to stargaze he instead finds ghoul and they have a nice long talk and poison tells him about their past and reveals that they’re not just a droid but a pornodroid and they just bond and shit and it’s all okay and ghouls like you don’t need to worry I’ll gladly watch the sun rise with you forever becuase they’ve been out on the roof talking all night and poisons like sounds romantic and ghouls like is that alright and poison like blushes and is like of course and the finally kiss like two days later.

And all is well actually everything is great for a few more months until they get in a fight with Korse and he’s like oh look who it is our escaped pornodroids and he talks shit at them like they’re not people and also Kobra hasn’t told anyone he’s trans he’s happy just presenting and not revealing those personal things about himself and his past so only poison knows he was a female pronodroid and while poison has been in love and doing great he’s been still hating himself and his body and his past and he’s totes autistic and is always overwhelmed and shit and every once in a while when he feels himself reaching a limit he takes time to himself to go blow off steam and scream into the desert in the middle of nowhere and shoot stuff or go to a concert or whatever and just empty that overfilling bucket. And when Korse comes he’s already been stressed but then Korse taunts him and calls him terrible shit and he’s like trembling in place as he’s like do your little friends there know what you are? That you’re a product of BLi? A droid? A bitch? And he’s like barely restraining himself but then Korse says something in reference to poison and how they’re an outdated model and would’ve been melted down if the two of them hadn’t malfunctioned and he basically says like a slur as he says that stuff and Kobra sees RED and fucking GOES FERAL AND ATTACKS HIM. And Korse can’t even fucking do anything his gun gets knocked aside and Kobra’s living up to his name and striking like a a fucking viper and absolutely beating Korses face in until he’s like unrecognizable. He’s not even aware of this, it’s a meltdown, he just went into a trance and doesn’t brave out of it until poison like grabs him and he realizes he’s shaking like a leaf and sobbing and he gets pulled away from Korse and they leave and leave him to die because he’s basically on the verge of death(they should’ve shot him though because he does in fact survive) and Kobra is like exhausted now becuase of this meltdown and all his secrets being exposed at once and he rests when they get back to the diner while poison freaks out and stays by his side all night becuase they’ve never seen Kobra like that and didn’t know he was struggling but they should have and once again morning comes and they have a nice long talk and Kobra agrees to be more open with everyone and everything’s fine again and like within a couple weeks he and Jet have formed a queerplatonic relationship and he’s doing better and it’s basically happily ever after but that’s not the end no there like a few year time skip. And poison was already an outdated model when they escaped the city and Kobra was a newer model but now they’re both like ancient in android terms and the desert has taken its toll on their mechanics and their batteries aren’t holding as much power anymore just like when poisons battery died before they escaped the city. Poison starts deteriorating first, limbs becoming stiff and achy, rust in their veins. They know their systems are messed up and there’s not really anything they can do and theyre fucking terrified and once again they hide their problems, they don’t show that they’re aging. But then the glitches start happening and they’re harder to hide and after a while Kobra finally corners him and is like tell me what is going on. I know you’re not okay. And poison breaks down and says his systems are failing again and Kobra with like a haunted expression is like I know it’s happening to me too. But his state isn’t nearly as bad as poison is yet. And like poisons protective of Kobra because he’s their younger brother but Kobra’s even more protective of poison because he already had to watch them nearly die the first time around when their battery was dying and an androids battery dying is akin to a human starving to death but being physically unable to eat or take in any nutrients whatsoever. So he almost lost poison once and he’s not about to do it again, he’s super fucking protective of them and he’s like we need to tell the others and poisons like but I’m scared how do we even fix this,

we’re androids we’re not meant to last for more than a few years and Kobra’s like I don’t know I really don’t trust me I’m scared too but we need to tell them because they’ll figure it out soon anyway and they deserve to know either way and you’re already getting pretty bad and sooner or later so will I. So they sit down their respective partner and tell them and theirs a lot of tears and they all search for tech or upgrades and solutions but can’t find anything good enough and all of a sudden poisons getting real bad real quick, glitching all the time and battery running out faster, and they’re basically about to die again and Kobra feels kind of like he’s failed them and the four of them realize the only way they’re going to save poison and Kobra is if they go to the city. So they do. They sneak in, find the labs, the plan is to steal the tech they need, new parts, new battery’s, whatever they can carry. But a lot of the new stuff isn’t compatible with the older models, not without precious time being lost with the personalizations that would need to be done to the tech to make it compatible, time they don’t have with poisons condition worsening by the day and Kobra also slowing down considerably.

And then an alarm goes off and Jet and ghoul fight off the oncoming dracs while Kobra’s helping poison and he sees all the new models laid out and empty, not programmed quite yet. And he has an idea. Jet and ghoul fight off the first wave of dracs and come back in like we need to get out of here but Kobra explains his idea and they’re like fuck wrought because they can’t leave to make it work. So they all barricade themselves in the lab while Kobra hooks poison into the like machines there to essentially transplant their programming and consciousness into the shell of the brand new android models laying around, because that’s something possible and easier than retrofitting a ton of tech. More dangerous since they have to be in the heart of bat city to do it, but worth it. And while poison in those new body is charging and rebooting Kobra’s up next because he walked Jet and ghoul though the process and now he’s getting his consciousness transferred to a new body too(they make sure it’s a male model this time around :3) and it takes like and hour for them each to reboot with like all systems ready so Jet and ghoul are on their own, doors barricaded, waiting for their best friends to wake up.

But they do, and they fight their way out. They all earn a few injuries but they survive, barely escaping and getting out of the city. But they do, they escape, they get home, and Kobra and Poison are in brand new vessels, they look different but not that much, androids are all pretty similar looking, and you can alter your own appearance somewhat. Kobra’s finally in the body he always wanted so he’s great, and both models are brand new and super advanced so they’re still not really superhuman, but these bodies will definitely hold up a lot longer to the elements, and they don’t have to run off plus, Their batteries last longer and there’s different ways of getting energy, like from eating, where food they ingest is converted into biofuel and they can run off it. Physically they’re more inhuman but simultaneously also more human than ever before. And that’s the definitive happy ending.

is the means to go on abandoned ? :((

ok it’s time for some brutal honesty

the straight answer is no it isn’t, but the long answer is a bit more complicated.

i adore the series with all my heart and i had so much passion for it and put so much of myself into it that i was kind of hyperfixated on writing it. i literally updated it every week (sometimes even twice a week) and spent almost 100% of my time on it. i literally put all of my heart into it even if there are grammar mistakes. every trace of serotonin and dopamine came from writing this fic and seeing people’s reactions. but over time a lot of things happened that happened to coincide with me writing, and it put a bit of a bad vibe surrounding it. not to mention a lot of the readers i had following the fic from the beginning have left the fandom at this point (which is totally normal and fine!) and it was a bit disheartening losing them and watching them move on. which i still adore all of the people (including anon!!) who still follow me and the fic and i am forever grateful for them!! i don’t deserve you guys, and i thank you so much for liking my work!! but over time, the words just didn’t flow like they usually did. it became more blocky and i’m sure you can tell that in the last few updates. i feel like there just isn’t enough heart in what i post and it feels like i’m doing it and myself a disservice by just trying to rush and finish it that way. it’s been a rough year and i haven’t been in the greatest headspace and it’s definitely impacted me creatively.

and i know it’s a hamilton fanfic and it’s never this serious, but to me it is. i literally spent a year working on it.

i don’t want people to think i’ve lied about updates. i honestly have tried and think i’m getting somewhere only for the spark to die once more. i’m not trying to string anyone along.

as to why it’s not discontinued, i know i’ll be able to get there again. i know i’ll be able to find the joy in it once i work through some stuff. i’m sure inspiration will strike me and i’ll get back in the flow of it. i really hope i’ll be able to finish it by the end of the year.

and it really hurts me to say this, and i’ve been putting it off, but i think i’m going to put the fic on official hiatus. i’m sure i’ll have a few ppl unfollow at this, but honestly i think it’s for the best. this hiatus could last until december or it could last only a week. who’s to say. i still have certain scenes written and almost everything plotted out, so it’s not like i’m wandering completely aimless.

thank you anon for caring about this fic as much as i did. i’m sorry this is probably not the answer you wanted and i’m so sorry to everyone who was waiting for me to finish :(

Fic Song Tag Game

Thank you @spindrifters for the tag!! This is gonna be unhinged jsyk, basically half these songs actually inspired the fic and the other half happened to be my hyperfixation song during an intense period of writing so they do not relate lyrically at all, but the vibes… the vibes.

True Blue by Boy Genius

But it feels good to be known so well

I can't hide from you like I hide from myself

I remember who I am when I'm with you

Your love is tough, your love is tried and true blue

Okay obviously I have to include the song that TTTB gets it’s title from. You’ve never done me wrong!!! Except for that one time!!!! Genuinely the sapphic Wolfstar anthem… what else can I say….

Body to Flame by Lucy Dacus

Longing for your short hair to grow back to the way you like

Thank you for the gesture

I regret ever implying that you could be better

Didn't mean to empty your perfect body

And fill it with my passing will

Easily won, weary of losing, gullible girl

Weak and alluring, well, we break our rules

Get drunk in the dark

Laughing aloud at the spinning stars

Ok this one is scary- so what happened is I wrote two scenes for TTTB before I ever heard this song, and then Mel read them and then she listened to this song and she was like “dude… this song is about your fic and those two scenes specifically” and I was like “haha yeah it’s Lucy Dacus, the Queen of Sapphic Pining” but then I listened to the song and like… the specificity. They lyrics match up exactly. You will see when we get to fourth and fifth year, but, Lucy, my wife, we were drinking from the same mother lake…

Vampires by Tommy Lefroy

And I know you

I know you

I know you know

I know you feel everything

Okay so this one has the above lyrics, which became a sort of source code for TTTB Sirius. I associate this song with her and it helped to ground my writing of her character in the first couple chapters. Anyway I love her, also Tommy Lefroy rules, they’re gonna get big, I just know it.

Holland, 1945 by Neutral Milk Hotel

The only girl I ever loved…

This one has absolutely jack shit to do with anything related to this fic, but I was deeply hyperfixating on it back in January when I was first outlining TTTB, sooo yeah. I also wrote the first scene I ever wrote for this fic while listening to this song on repeat at my favorite coffee shop.

The Bench by Like Roses

Break down with me on the phone

Just like we did those nights when I was at home

This is another one that lyrically doesn’t have much to do with anything, but really helped me achieve the specific angsty headspace I needed to be in to write the year one Christmas chapter when Sirius goes home to Grimmauld Place. Also the above lyrics really gave me ‘prongsfoot talking through the mirrors’ vibes. I know this song is actually about addiction, like I’m aware.

Francis Forever by Mitski

I don’t think I could stand to be

Where you don’t see me

Mel texted me in a panic because she had read a snippet of a scene I wrote from sixth year and then listened to this song in close succession and she said that she had never really listened to these lyrics before, or she didn’t fully get what they meant, until she read that snippet and thought about this song and had a breakdown. Anyway, something for y’all to look forward too. Post prank vibes, delicious angst.

Honorable Mentions go to:

The entirety of Transgender Dysphoria Blues by Against Me- nothing is more punk rock than being transgender and if you haven’t listened to this album yet, do yourself a favor and turn that shit up right now. Fucking bangers all the way through.

Dreamt We Were Closer by Ash Tuesday- look it’s not my fault that this is a Wolfstar song, okay???

For Sale: Ford Pinto by Rosie Tucker- my current hyper-fixation song, idk what will come of it yet but it is a whole vibe.

Tagging Mel @capacity-for-wonder who is on her honeymoon but will never miss a chance to make a playlist.

Alright, time to out myself as a forever hyperfixated transformers fan to all the new people, here are my overall thoughts and first impressions on Transformers: Earthspark

So here are the things that I liked:

Reformed Megatron. I love the guy. His friendship with Dot is wholesome. He still cares for the decepticons and constantly questions GHOST and their involvement with the Cybertronians. I feel pretty confident that he will stay good throughout the show after ep8 and that brings me joy.

Optimus is dad™. Socially awkward OP is what I live for after all. I’m very interested in his personal conflict, it’s clear that he doesn’t like working with GHOST and I can see why there’s not much of a choice for the autobots. The line that got me even more invested in his story is about how he can’t just “throw a tantrum” unlike Megatron. I hope we get more screen time on that.

Terrans! I like the concept of them being the next step in evolution and the lore behind them provided so far is a good amount. Their connection to the kids is interesting as well, it’s adorable how they are excepted as siblings. (but what is going on with their names man)

Twitch is definitely my favorite terran. Her anxiety and overachiever vibe is 100/10. Also just straight up calling Wheeljack DAD 2 and him going with it was nice.

Millennial crisis Bumblebee is on my top 3. When We Were Young fest is probably the highlight of his year. He is trying his best.

Steve Blum as Starscream. Those two seconds of his iconic laugh are the best thing in those 10 episodes. I also had no clue that he is coming back so I lost my shit then and there.

Decepticons. Soundwave is still superior, I liked Swindle and the twins too. I obviously want more Soundwave and Megatron interactions.

Mention of the 13, please give me some more lore

Honorable mentions: Arcee and Elita-1 but we didn’t get much of them, the agent dude he cracks me up

And now, my one problem with it:

The balance between filler and plot is off, which messes with the pacing too. It didn’t feel engaging, it felt like I had to sit through an hour of content until it got to the part that is actually exiting. We spent few episodes having no progress and then the last two episodes just dumped a bunch of info on us and gave us those cool fighting scenes. At that point I was already half-disconnected anyway, my excitement coming into this new show already faded and it’s only the first half of s1! Each time we saw a glimpse of the autobots or decepticons it was quickly replaced by kids drama. It feels like humans had the most screentime and they weren’t even that interesting, just forced. They would’ve been cool, the family dynamics are nice but the title literally says TRANSFORMERS. It’s like there is a whole other show with GHOST and Cybertronian war that is still going on to some extent while we’re watching kids have their first day in the new school and it’s a shame. I really do hope that the crew just needs more time to figure out the best approach, again, there’s a lot of concepts that can be explored properly. I’ll keep an eye on it for now.

🏜️ and 🌿 for the ask game?

i am captivated by how beautiful that desert emoji is on iphone … wowie

🏜️ - favourite team or duo?

fh is the obvious answer but seeing them interact on screen also fills me with a sinking dread unrivaled by anything else and its also specific to just third life so. I’m going to list some more for the other series ig with an aside that says I used to be a big renchanting fan back in the day, but for third life all the red/green duos besides fh are equally loved by me I’d say

ll - Team BEST, specifically whatever Skizz and Tango had going on it was so fucked up. Skizz when he’s willing to sacrifice everything for his team and therefore cant conceptualize that the others wouldnt do the same, so he lets the sake of togetherness squeeze tango for everything he’s worth and then when bdubs kills tango he tells tango to apologize for getting mad. insane AND fascinating

dl - DIVORCE YEAAAH WOO YEAAAH DIVORCE QUARTET FOREVER WOOOHOO!!!! they were my first love actually like. they caused the hyperfixation. I watched the dl finale and thats what started it I explicitly remember bc I was trying so hard to NOT get hyperfixated at the time. It was a constant battle. And then I watched the finale and I immediately lost and I’m still here. Which is really funny bc I really couldnt tell you any thoughts I have about them anymore? It was all very surface level stuff that didn’t need analyzing from me like everyone got it I didnt need to make a case to anyone so I guess I just forgot…. They still hold a special place in my heart though

limlife - Clockers. Not for any character reason theyre just really fucking funny. nothing in the life series is beating the playing catch scene in terms of hilarity to me. next

sl - sl is interesting because the alliances arent as clear cut from day one as they typically are. Theyre sort of taking shape now but a vast majority of them are still part of the larger community rather than shutting themselves off to be with their buddies. I couldnt tell you a favorite team bc I dont even know what the teams are besides like… heart foundation and the cherry blossom band. and the mounders I guess but those mfs are splitting up at the first sight of danger sorry 🌿 - any favourite interpretations?

of what. wait of what. the characters? the series as a whole? uh. um. hm. this one is so open ended hold on. whatever this animation has going on with desert duo? It sort of opened my eyes to how we as fans can do whatever we want with what the series gives us and spin the story in countless different directions. I love when people make the narrative their own and expand on it in unique ways

How long does it take for you to write fics? I feel like you’ve been posting lots recently so I was curious! Do you have a long editing and revision process?

hi hi! ah okay so how long it takes me to write a single fic varies widely! it depends on the fic, the length, how complex the idea is (ie is it a drabble or a oneshot or is it a longer piece or a part of a series), how deep in a hyperfixation i am (ie tokrev is all my mind wants to think about right now so it’s easier to bang out tiny pieces for them atm), how busy and how stressed i am with other life things, how badly my ocpd is acting up, etc etc etc the list goes on forever.

i have been posting a lot lately and i’m really proud of myself for it!! i’ve been trying so hard to get back into releasing pieces the way i used to, and this year at least i seem to get into a groove of consistently releasing stuff and then something in my life happens and i fall off of it again :/ but i’m trying so so hard to become more consistent again. additionally, the tokrev pieces have been an effort to combat my ocpd, so i’ve been challenging myself to release them even though they aren’t perfect and to NOT obsessively comb through them for days/weeks/months on end. the touya-nii piece i just released has actually been 90% done since the end of AUGUST lmao :/ i have a lot of pieces like that just rotting away in my docs ._. i really miss being about to write something i was proud of and happy with in a day, and i really miss being able to just write something and not obsessively go through it over and over and over and over again to ‘make sure every word is as perfect as it can be’ so i’m working extremely hard to get back to that place.

ocpd aside, the length of my editing process also varies widely completely depending on the piece!! sometimes a piece only needs a quick glance and sometimes i need to rework a part or scene several times before it feels right. i discuss my editing process in sightly more detail right here! <3

1, 3, 12, 13, 15, 19, 23, 24, 25, 27! Or I’d say any 5 from this list that you want lol because this is a lot

Oh boy [cracks knuckles]

1: favorite fic you wrote this year

Definitely the Christmas fic! I just enjoy the fluff so much and I worked really hard on it.

3: favorite line/scene you wrote this year

I answered this one with the ao3 wrapped asks forever ago but I’ll say it again! I like the imagery in this scene and this is where I think my descriptive writing and sense of metaphors really fell into place, from bad idea!

The girl in front of Robin moved back and forth, alcohol strong on her breath. She laughed as Robin spun her and pulled her close, her breath hot on the stranger’s ear. She made pointed eye contact across the bar, watching as Nancy was illuminated in soft pink. It matched the shade of her lips—the blush Robin wanted to put on her cheeks.

Blue light shone down on Robin and the stranger, gleaming in the former’s stormy eyes as they met with Nancy’s ocean.

Waves crashed and lightning struck, filling the room with unbearable electricity. The lights met and flared in an intense clash of violet sky, and Robin knew she was doomed to be lost at sea. Her heart was racing with exertion and excitement, drawn against her will to the other girl—the girl who wanted to kill her. The girl who was probably planning her demise at this very moment. The thought was exhilarating.

12: favorite character to write about this year

Nancy Wheeler my beloved <33 She’s just such a complex, malleable character. I love writing her personality and trying to figure out how she would respond in certain scenarios—and since the Duffers won’t let her explore her trauma, I will!! Also as an eldest daughter burnt out gifted kid… She’s very projection shaped

13: favorite writing song/album/artist of this year

Stick Season by Noah Kahan for sure! I still would really, really like to write a string of one shots for each song, but especially Growing Sideways, Northern Attitude, and The View Between Villages. I love his music and his voice and I think it’s very easy to ronancify this album lol

15: something you learned this year

Oh this one is fun. Imma be cheesy about it. I learned to stop letting what other people think of me get in the way of having fun. I was so against ever writing fic because “I don’t want to be cringe and get made fun of.” Fuck that. I am cringe and it’s FUN. I will own it with pride. I like my silly little self indulgent fics.

19: any new fics to start next year

Oh god so many. I’m not kidding when I say I’m past 30 on the WIP/idea list. I’ll toss some favorites tho:

say you’re gonna come back: one shot based on Sports Car by Valley, Ronance reunite and fall in love all over again years down the road

there in the garden, she looked my way: beauty and the beast au multi chapter featuring vampire Nancy and just so much pining

she will pull the trigger: monster hunter Nance and werewolf Rob and they’re both GNC ft toxic lesbianism because wanting to kill each other is sexy

23: fics you wanted to write but didn’t

I’m still thinking so hard about run, devil, run, which was a Wild West au featuring werewolf Nance and vampire Rob but I don’t think that one will stick. I go through a circle of phases of really stubborn hyperfixations and the wild west pops up as one of them but never stays for long. Was feeling it for a week, wrote one scene, then sort of dropped it to lowest priority

24: favorite fic you read this year

Oh god there are so many. I refuse to pick just one, but I’ll stick with 3 I think.

One of them (surprise) is you! a never ending story changed my brain chemistry. dungeon master rules lawyer repressed furious mega nerd comphet religious guilt traumatized Nancy my beloved!!!! Not saying I’d get a tattoo based off a fic but I am saying a d20 on 13 would be so cool… (also special shout out to DITM, I love that one dearly too, especially Martha) I also ADORE when you can tell a writer is into poetry and it shows in their word. Flowery prose and heart shattering metaphors my beloved

I have sung praises about this fic and I’ll fucking do it again. Bloodletting my beloved. I am once again in awe of the way @lavenderlevetan weaves the story and connects all the pieces. I love the dynamic and the way the tension builds. I am feral about vampires and biting, sue me.

And I have to say put me in the movies (on a king sized silver screen) by @sapphicriley is also one of my all time favorites. I love the back and forth banter and it’s sweet and fluffy and it’s just a feel good fic and I like to reread it when I’m feeling down. Another example of poetic writing as well <33

25: a fic you read this year that you would recommend everyone read

Well all of the one from above ofc. Also dancing in the moonlight. Also,,, Raise Dead by @eskawrites killed me and healed me. If you can handle the angst, this one is an incredible read and I cannot recommend it enough. I don’t really cry when reading, but this one actually had me in tears in the best way.

27: favorite fanfic author of the year

This is like asking me to pick a favorite child. God. I’m terms of writing, I have to say it’s between a few, but there’s this one rando who wrote this D&D fic and also one about monster fucking. You might have heard of her? I think her name is summersociety or something.

I also adore @lavenderlevetan (I will continue to scream about Bloodletting forever!!!) and you guys are in for a treat with some of the WIP sneak peeks I’ve gotten from @suwunnysideup

And I have to say every single one of my mutuals are just such incredible, talented writers, and such amazing friends. I love you all. 🥺

very long and kind of emotional word vomit post under the cut

tl;dr - I love BCS and this fandom community and I'm really not ready to say goodbye to the story and the characters

I shared a post earlier saying that a piece of media has never affected me as much as better call saul. last night I wept. I felt sick to my stomach, and my heart ached so much I couldn’t sleep. I’ve been hyperfixated on shows and movies before, but I’ve never had such a strong visceral reaction. in some of my other fandoms, I’ve cried—uncontrollably sobbed even—when a favorite character died or something else tragic occurred. like when tony stark died in endgame I ugly cried during the last 30 mins of the movie. I spent 10 years loving that character but then when I left the theater, I was able to go about my day. I was a little down for a few hours, and I certainly continued to grieve the character, but I was functional.

I’ve been contemplating all day why this show, better call saul, has ingrained itself into my being more so than any other show. one reason may be the amount of time I’ve spent with this universe and these characters. I didn’t watch brba from the very beginning—I started while season 3 was airing—but I’ve been with this universe for 12 years!! but I’ve been with other fandoms for just as long if not longer. another reason is definitely the quality of the show. across the board, with acting, writing, directing, music, cinematography, sound, costumes, literally every department is at the top of their game producing some of the best quality television to ever exist. no one is doing it like gilligould and co. NO ONE. but that’s not the only reason. I’ve watched other shows and movies that are of similar quality. Avatar the Last Airbender is and probably will forever be one of the greatest animated shows to ever air imo and for a lot of the same reasons. and yeah, atla holds a special place in my heart and I cry every time I watch certain scenes, but I don’t feel debilitating physical pain from it.

but after reflecting on it all day, what sets BCS apart from all of my other hyperfixations is the timing of it all. as I said, I’ve been a devout fan of the brba universe since around 2010, but my hyperfixation hit a whole new level in march 2020 when the pandemic hit and the first lockdown occurred. this was a very dark time in my life, as I know it was for many others. suddenly being totally isolated, scared about our health and our future, and for those of us in the usa, the fear and anger about our political landscape was traumatizing. I turned to tv and other media to fill some of the voids in my life, bcs and brba being the main shows I turned to for comfort. tbh I think that bcs being there for me during such a traumatizing and lonely time just stitched the characters even deeper into my heart.

another thing that sets it apart, is that this is the first time I have ever made friends through fandom/online spaces. I’ve been on tumblr for about 11-12 years, but until spring of 2020, I never really interacted with other people in fandom spaces. I was always a little detached, simply reblogging things I liked. as I’m sure we all were during the beginning of the pandemic, I was in desperate need of social interaction, and so I started to branch out a little bit in online fandom spaces like tumblr and ao3. then in november 2020 my family and I came down with severe covid. like my mom had to be hospitalized (she’s fine now) and I should have been but wasn’t because of my age and the number of beds in the hospital. during this time a lot of my irl “friends” showed their true colors. even though they knew we were sick hardly any of my friends checked in on me and my family. fortunately, we had other people besides my shitty “friends” to rely on to take care of us. anyway, I lost a lot of friends during that time, and so I dove even deeper into cultivating my friendships online as well as the few irl friends who stuck by my side.

I’ve made some fantastic friends over the last 2 years in the bcs fandom. some of y’all know me better in some ways than several of my irl friends.  the bonding that I have shared with y’all as we waited for season 6—the watch parties on tutturu (aka hyperbeam), the unhinged blogging, discord server inside jokes, fic writing and reading, song covers, voice chats, memeing and so many more interactions both about BCS and outside of it—all of these experiences continued to weave the bcs universe, its characters, and this fandom community into my soul.

last night’s episode was the end of an era, the beginning of the end. and the break-up between kim and jimmy, though inevitable, was devastating. I am utterly heart broken and am having trouble rising up out of how depressed I am about it. I never anticipated that I would be so emotionally invested in these wonderful characters that I would feel physically ill at the thought of their separation. I love this show so so much and it has gotten me through some very dark times, and I feel absolutely sick thinking about it ending. but I’ve realized it’s because I associate these characters and story that I love so much with all the wonderful people I’ve met here. y'all truly helped me through those dark times as well.

I am really not ready to say goodbye to this story and these characters. and I know it’s a silly thought, but I also think that the episode subconsciously triggered a fear that when the show ends, so will the lovely community I’ve made over the last 2 years (I’ve got some abandonment issues, but I won’t go into that here). I really hope that is not the case, and I’m going to try my damnedest to keep in touch with y’all even if the fandom dies down because this community truly means so much to me. 

anyway, I don’t really know where I was going with this…I don't think I articulated anything very well and I’m just kind of rambling at this point 😅 but I really just needed to write down my thoughts to process all these feelings I’ve been having all day. and also just wanted to tell y’all how much this fandom means to me 💖

edit:

thought I should clarify that even though I'm devastated by their break up, I'm anxious and excited for journey these characters are going to take us on in the final few episodes...even if I'm not ready for it to end yet 💖

BNHA Recreated (because horikoshi had so many great opportunities that he just. DIDN’t take.)

So this is kinda the bnha world in my head. A lot is different; ethnicities, sexualitys, characters, character development, relationships, quirk theories, you name it, it’s probably there and i could infodump forever.

So I’m starting a series! To introduce BNHA Revamped! Aka my paracosm/hyperfixation/special interest, because I have adhd and asd and they know no limits.

The Todorokis

Probably one of the defining points in this au, the Todorokis are a family. Rei Himura and Enji Todoroki went to U.A. in the hero course, with Rei being in 1B and Enji in 1A. Never interacted, barely acknowledged each other. After graduation, each went on to be sidekicks and quickly open their own agencies. One day, Enji is called to a scene of a robbery and arrives just in time to see Rei skating on ice, creating in from her feet as she glides in the sky, swiftly apprehending the villain. There’s ice glistening on her suit and skin, her short white hair is waving in the breeze, her expression is determined, and the sun is reflecting off of her just right. She looks like a higher being. A kami placed in a human body.

And Enji is infatuated the moment he actually sees her. For the next couple weeks, he attempts to request her assistance in villain attacks, suggest working together, tries to give her fighting tips (because this man has legit no rizz whatsoever) and Rei, being the dense mf she is, thinks he’s looking down on her and trying to lower her hero rank status. Which cannot happen, because her family isn’t doing great and they need the money she’ll bring through hero work. So she sees him as a rival. Bless this confident, determined man, Enji keeps trying and eventually just. Shows up. At her agency. (which is filled with ice btw, purely for the hilarious thought of Enji, in his fire suit, very awkwardly clutching a bouquet while trying very very hard not to melt anything) And he repeatedly does this. For months. All the while, Rei still thinks he’s trying to undermine her.

”Blizzard-san, Endeavor brought you flowers again.”

“Run them through security, they’re prob poisonous.”

“Blizzard, I really don’t think-“

“Always trying to take me down, huh Endeavor? Well when they come back poisoned, the media’ll love that and you’ll go down.”

“Blizzard, I think he’s trying to court you.”

“…what.”

And so thanks to her secretary, (bless him) she finally figures out what Enji is doing and realizes maybe he’s not so bad. So at this point it’s been like a year, and when he next gives her tips again, she goads him into a fight, wins, and when she has him in a headlock, she bends down and whispers in his ear, “Thursday. 5. My agency.” Then just lets go and leaves.

And yeah! They try dating, its a bit rocky at first, then they decide to get married, (Enji attempts to propose but loses his cool halfway through (see what i did there) and Rei grabs the ring, puts it on herself, slaps him in the face to stop his muttering, then bends down and kisses him, mumbling yes in between kisses.

So a few years later, they decide to try and start a family. Rei takes a leave of absence and places her cousin Geten in charge while she’s away, as Rei watched her mother have multiple miscarriages right in front of her and eventually saw her die, and does not want to take any chances with her child. So while Enji and Rei stay at home, Geten is illegally providing money from the agency to the Paranormal Liberation Army. When Rei finds out, he’s fired, arrested, and the agency is almost bankrupt. Rei tries to keep her sidekicks and staff on as long as she can, but by this point they have such a low salary it doesn’t feel right. She lays them all off and closes the agency, despite Enji’s protests that he can help provide money. Rei argues that she’d be gone for so long from pregnancy that it wouldn’t even really be her agency anymore, and so the argument ends. A month or so later, she has Touya prematurely from stress (also, premature birth Touya anyone? it would make sense why he’s so short lmao-) and a year later, gets pregnant with Fuyumi.

Touya develops his Quirk first; Cremation. At around 4 years old, he can generate red flames and burn things, though it always burns himself. The doctors discover he inherited his mum’s ice resistance, bla bla bla, and advise Enji to let down Touya’s dream of becoming a hero. Enji considers it, and Rei immediately agrees. However, Enji decides to continue training Touya, because he believes in his kids and goddamnit if Touya wants to be a hero so help him he’ll be a hero. Rei is furious, and they have a huge fight over it. She eventually surrenders, on the one condition that they contact a support company to make Touya gear to help control his flames and prevent any worse damage. Years later, at around 7 years old, Touya’s Quirk develops and he can now create blue flames. Enji joins him on the mountain and praises his abilities, and their bond strengthens. Meanwhile, 6 year old Fuyumi is inside playing with 3 year old Natsuo, when she sees blue flames rising from the mountain. She panics; running outside to try and stop the flames, unbeknownst to the fact that they were under control. She develops her Quirk, Dry Ice, in that instance. Ice that can burn without heat. And as she’s running through the forest, spreading her ice, trying to rescue Touya and Enji, she realizes just how natural this feels to her. Like she was meant to rescue.

After finding out that the flames were under control and her brother and father are safe, Fuyumi tells her parents she wants to be a rescue hero.

With Rei and Enji both being combat heroes, usually the first on the scene, they’re surprised and unsure how to train Fuyumi. Rei and Enji both agree to train her, though Enji spends the most time with her while Rei is busy with Natsuo.

A year later, Touya is now 8 and Fuyumi is 7, 4 year old Natsuo behind them and Shouto due next month.

Natsuo is helping Fuyumi and Rei bake cookies when he opens the oven door too soon, and Rei and Fuyumi are shouting as he reaches in and grabs the scorching hot pan, without gloves on, and puts it on the counter. Fuyumi and Rei are speechless, and Natsuo turns around like “what?” There’s no burns on his hands, he seems completely unaffected, as if… he didn’t feel the heat. Rei calls Enji in to confirm her theory, and asks Natsuo to touch the flame he conjured in his hand. Confused, Natsuo does exactly that, and feels no different. Rei then covers his arm in ice, the coldest she can create, one that can cause fatal frostbite in minutes.

It doesn’t do anything.

A week later, Natsuo’s Quirk is registered as Temperature Immunity, having inherited both extreme heat and cold resistances from his parents. It’s that same week that Shouto is born, though he was expected to have a twin. However, the twin merged with Shouto in the womb, and thus Shouto was born by himself.

Natsuo decided he wanted to be an hero after watching Touya and Fuyumi train. He wanted to be closer to his siblings, especially Touya, and saving people was always a good thing, so why not? And so Enji added him to the training schedule he had outside the training room.

Now, Shouto is 5, Natsuo is 8, Fuyumi is 12, and Touya is 13. Shouto was diagnosed with genetic chimerism, due to having heterochromia in his eyes and hair, and his Quirk was seemingly halved, with ice resistance and creation on his right, and fire on his left. He is also diagnosed with autism, a genetic trait on his mother’s side that no one else in his family inherited. One day, Rei was startled by Shouto in the kitchen, and accidentally spilled boiling water on his face. In a panic, she instinctively iced his face, though that only made it worse. Shouto doesn’t blame his mother, but she still blames herself.

At 14, Touya is sent to a hero training camp and meets Keigo Takami, and the two are fast friends. At that same camp, Touya discovers his attraction to boys and experiments* (non-sexually, they’re fourteen guys) with a very willing Keigo, though the friends with benefits relationship* (ONCE AGAIN, NOT SEXUAL) is broken when camp ends, as Keigo’s strict Hero Commission training bans any form of communication or technology and he’s moved around so constantly that no letters would arrive. The two part, vowing to find each other again one day.

That same summer, Fuyumi came out to her family as bi and greysexual, and Touya added he was gay. Enji and Rei were supportive, and while Enji didn’t completely understand he supported his kids wholeheartedly.

When Touya turned 15, he tried out for Yuuei in both the Recommendation and Entrance Exam, wanting a secure spot but also wanting to earn it. He passed both with flying colours, having studied with Fuyumi for weeks. The next year, Fuyumi also tried out for Yuuei, though she just took the Entrance Exam, seeing it as a way to possibly bond with her future classmates. She was took top spot in the written exam, and top five in the practical. Natsuo tried out for Yuuei as well a few years after, but only made it to General Studies because of the Quirk bias, which quickly resulted in Enji and Rei hiring the most feared and powerful lawyer in Japan: Midoriya Inko. She swiftly brought down Yuuei, and the whole campus, including all exams, were designed to be all-Quirk-inclusive.

Natsuo was transferred to the Hero Course that year.

While Natsuo was in his first year at Yuuei, Fuyumi had just graduated as the Dry Ice Hero: Polaris, and was a sidekick to Sir Nighteye, as he was intrigued by her calm exterior, determination, patience, and optimism.

Touya had graduated a year prior as the Blue Flame Hero: Dabi, and was a known sidekick to Endeavor.

During his final year, Natsuo graduated and became one of the fastest climbing heroes in Japan, ranking in the top 100 within his first official year as the Coldfire Hero: Temp. Fans all over adored him for his determined yet caring, almost teddy bear-like personality, and was successful enough to start his own agency by the time Shouto enrolled in Yuuei through the Recommendation Exam.

During his first year, Shouto became friends with the DekuSquad, placed third in the Sports Festival, (etc etc etc) and interned under Rei, who came back after her 23 year leave of absence. The public was shocked by this, as the media had declared she had retired after closing down her agency, even though she never confirmed the theories. Rei became a co-ceo of the Endeavor Agency, alongside her husband.

He also came out as aroace, demi-nonbinary, and uranic, and their family uses his preferred pronouns (he/they/ey), though while Rei and Enji have no idea how to use neopronouns, they’re trying. (can you tell i really want shouto to have a healthy supportive family? because i really want shouto to have a healthy supportive family.)

Aaannddd that’s all i have so far! i have a couple quirk analyses on the siblings, and a few rough sketches of their hero costumes, but this is mainly me infodumping :)

For the Fic Writer Ask:

3, 9, 12, 13, 15 and 20 (sorry for asking so many, but I'm really excited for your answers!)

hey friend, thank you! and don’t worry about asking too many questions, i felt talkative :D

[deep fic writer asks]

3. what fic are you emotionally attached to?

in all honesty, a lot of the fics that i love the most will probably stay forever unfinished in my drafts. as for the fics i actually have finished and posted, i have a soft spot for unscripted, and the reason is that writing it has been fun. readers have praised the character development in it, but it’s something that just happened while i was busy being outrageously self-indulgent with a plot that, to me, was head-empty-just-smut. it reminds me that a story doesn’t have to be that deep to be enjoyable and worth telling.

9. what's your writing process like?

an important part of my process is that appreciation and community-driven deadlines are the main motivators that drive me to actually finish works, which is why shipping weeks are very useful indeed. most of my fics (if not all) are birthed through hyperfixation, which in my case means that i have to squeeze the creative juices on the page before the enthusiasm fades.

on the plot side of things, there are vibes at the wheel rather than a well-thought plan, which is why i usually don’t go for longer stories (though i want to learn to.) i imagine a scene, a concept or a collection of them, and then i string them together until they’re coherent.

thus, when i know that i have a story i want to tell and there’s an audience that makes me excited to sit down and get my fingers on the keyboard, i found out that having a daily word count goal and a timer is the best way for my brain to stop obsessing over every single word and produce instead a repetitive, absurd, unhinged stream of consciousness that i can nonetheless edit later. i put on some background music, open focuswriter with its handy word count options to set my daily goal, start the timer and then i type away until i’m done, even if nothing that comes out makes any lick of sense. all that first draft has to do is exist.

12. What’s your perfect environment to create/write?

for the timed sessions i enjoy sitting at the desk in my room where i usually work. when inspiration strikes me elsewhere i use one of those note-taking apps in my phone and then transfer it to my computer later if i feel like it.

mostly, i want to have time and space to relax and do my thing.

13. Do you take pride in your writing, or does it embarrass you? Why?

interesting question 👀 a bit of both, i think. i do like it at times, but when i go back and read my fics i also feel like my style is kind of immature and the story could have been told better.

15. How do you think your writing as improved over time?

i learned not to judge myself too much during the writing process, so i gained more inspired turn of phrases and emotional depth that i could never have reached if i kept obsessing over good form and not sounding like the ESL speaker that i am. my mother tongue bleeds through my words in many ways and that’s okay.

20. What’s the greatest gift you’ve gotten from your writing?

readers who care about the stories i tell and who leave comments to let me know that they appreciate what i do. it’s humbling and exciting in a way i can’t describe. in the past, it often felt shallow and shameful to think that i create not only for myself but also because i love the validation, but i realize now that it’s true: community is great. sharing my stuff with people who are excited about it is amazing. the more love my creative works receive, the more of them i want to put out in the world.