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rosierin · 3 years

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Studying with you

pairing: tsukishima x fem!reader

synopsis: after finding out about your gradually decreasing grades, your teacher urges you to change your studying methods and decides to find you a tutor among the class. shame that tutor is literally the biggest jerk known to man. you swear he knows nothing but insults and that his heart is made of stone. or is it?

genre: fluff

type: oneshot

word count: 1.6k

a/n: i hate love this guy, srsly

"Oi, (y/n). Wake up, we're not finished."

Your head jerks up and you let out a loud, drawn out groan as your eyes refocus on the man in front of you. He's sneering, same as usual, and you wish you could suddenly go back to dream land where you were happily baking cookies with Hinata and Kageyama.

Beneath your arms are two gaping algebra textbooks. One is riddled with scribbly notes and an unnecessary amount of pointless doodles, except the one of Tsukishima— scowling with a head drawn way too big compared to the rest of his skinny body. The other is filled with neat, detailed formulas, pastel highlights and all the correct answers which you've been struggling to find for the past two hours.

"I'm up, I'm up, geez.." You yawn with your head still on the table and look up at Tsukishima with drowsy eyes. "You could've woken me up a little nicer, ya know."

"Yeah.. no. How about you hurry up and finish so I can go home?" He looks more than done at this point and huffs, pointing at a formula jotted messily on your paper. "And you got that one wrong again, by the way."

You squint at your work, then realize he was right. "Oh. My bad."

Wanting to get things over with, you get back to work but your eyelids are so heavy it's ridiculous. Not to mention your brainpower has reached its limit.

You can feel your grip on your pen loosen as you try and correct your work but before you know it, your head drops again, only to be jolted awake by a sudden smack to the back of the head with what feels like a textbook.

"What the— Do you mind?!" You snap.

Tsukishima doesn't react to your outburst in the slightest, just nods to your unfinished work with a look of lazy authority. "Algebra." He stares at you with a deadpan expression when you pout. "Now."

"Fiiine." You sigh, annoyed that your puppy dog eyes didn't work on Tsukishima. Not that you thought they would. Tsukishima didn't seem like the type to particularly like animals, except maybe for dinosaurs. He had a small keychain of one buried deep within his pencil case, you found. "You know, you'd make a terrible teacher."

This time, it's Tsukishima's turn to yawn, stretching his long limbs and you have to force yourself not to focus on the pull of his lean muscles despite yourself. Then, he turns to look at you with a look of false innocence. "Sorry, go on?"

"I hate you."

"Great. Now ask me if I care."

You suck in through your teeth as you hold back from socking the blonde straight in the face. He's been sassing you non-stop since the beginning of your study session and you'd think you'd be used to his perpetual cocky remarks by now but alas, he was still a huge pain in your ass.

"Where're you going?" You ask as Tsukishima gets up from his chair that's in front of your desk, dusting the eraser shavings off your textbooks.

"Aw. Think you'll miss me?"

You bite your lip down and he notices, smirking contently before deciding to answer: "going to get some water. That question better be finished by the time I get back."

He's gone before you can retort, long legs granting him a quick escape. However halfway down the hallway you hear him add: "or I'll make you do three more."

Great.

"Yessir," you sigh, though you have absolutely no intention of following through.

You glance down at your textbooks for good measure�� textbooks which are practically staring at you, and you can picture them with beady little eyes as though they're chanting— soooolve ussss.

You shudder. Man, you really were tired.

"Yeah, no. Sorry, Tsukki."

Pushing your homework aside, unfazed by your salty tutor's threats, you decide it's time for an actual break. You deserved it, right? Yeah, yeah you did. So without second thought, you let your attention drift to the scenery outside instead.

You'd been so focused on your homework (and Tsukishima's sass) that you hadn't even noticed the beautiful sunset that was now setting over the hills of Karasuno High. You always loved the way it looked at this hour, basking the buildings and tall, lush trees in its warm light. It was all too soothing, so soothing that you hadn't even realized you were once more falling asleep, eyeslids fighting to stay open until they finally gave in and what little willpower you had left, left your body.

"Right, time's up. You better be finish—"

The moment Tsukishima walks back into the classroom, eyes settling on your current state— sprawled out on your desk, mouth slightly agape and completely out cold, he's overcome with the urge to sigh.

He walks over to your desk and sits down opposite you, then as he leans his cheek into his palm, he lazily pokes your cheek— once, twice, but gets no reaction in response.

"You've got to be kidding me.." He sighs. But he decides to not bother and wake you up this time. What'd be the point? You clearly weren't in any shape to study and honestly, he didn't have the patience in him anymore to try in case it'd drive him crazy.

For a second he debates just leaving you there, passed out of your classroom desk, but quickly decides against it in case he gets an earful from your parents about leaving you alone or something. The last thing he wants is any extra trouble.

Therefore he agrees, albeit begrudgingly, to let you sleep. Just until you were rested up enough to work again.

⭐

Thirty minutes go by, you're still fast asleep.

During that time, Tsukishima took it upon himself to slip his headphones on and listen to some beats, hazel eyes flitting beyond the window to watch the last of the sunset, hoping it'd make the time go by quicker.

Usually, this would be right up his alley; peace and quiet, chill lofi and a sunset, however when sat on a painfully uncomfortable, wooden chair rather than his comfy and plump single bed, the experience was significantly less appealing. Therefore, after trying to find a comfortable sitting position and failing for the fourth time he decides to take his headphones off and focus back on his studies— he might as well, only when he reaches for his pen, he realizes it isn't there.

Amber eyes scan the table. Usually it'd be in his pencil case; he doesn't remember taking it ou—

Ah, never mind. It all makes sense when he sees it. Not in his pencil case after all, but balanced precariously between your fingers.

He rolls his eyes.

Why didn't she just use her own pen?

Reaching for it, he attempts to pull it out of your grasp only to freeze when you begin to stir.

He doesn't know why at this point— he could just wake you up, that's what he'd initially planned. But now, for some reason, there's something that prevents him from doing so. Maybe it had something to do with the way you were sleeping so peacefully.

He tries to pull at his pen again— gently— but this time, it isn't you stirring that makes him seize up, but the way your index and middle finger hook around his own.

His brain stutters.

Well, this is new.

Tsukishima's back straightens an awkward amount, completely unsure of what to do. Nothing like this has ever happened to him before. He becomes painfully aware of that. He's also painfully aware that you could possibly wake up while holding him like this.

Thankfully, you don't. And although the tenseness of his body is beginning to hurt, he still takes the time to admire your sleeping form.

You're laying crossed armed, head nestled between them, facing him. He watches your body rise and fall ever so gently, can almost hear your quiet breaths. It's picturesque, almost; the way your hair glows beneath the bright full moon. Unknowingly, his thumb twitches nearer, gravitating towards the warmth of your hand and he can almost feel—

"Enjoying yourself there?"

Suddenly he's frozen. Though it only lasts a second, for the next he's already retracted his hand, folding it under his arm like it was never there to begin with.

"Wh— How long have you been awake?"

"Long enough," you say, smiling curiously at him and for once the tables have been turned; the teased having become the teaser. "So you can be nice sometimes."

Tsukishima's expression is anything but impressed as you mock him, his face caught between confused and annoyed, and dare you say even a little bit embarrassed? He's quick to shake it off though, sparing himself of any sly comment as he regains his usual cool demeanor.

"Please. You're the one who grabbed me first," he scoffs.

"But you didn't try to move," you shoot back.

There's a strange atmosphere that settles in the room as your mishief-glinting eyes bore into his, and Tsukishima doesn't dare talk back for once, having been robbed of all witty comebacks. He hates being at a loss for words, but he hates even more so, the beginnings of a grin forming on your features, one that he knows is a result of his shortcomings.

"Whatever, (y/n) just pack up your stuff. We're done for the night," he says as he himself starts tidying his belongings.

You chuckle then nod your head. "Sure thing, sensei."

"...don't call me that."

"Sensei."

"Urgh, shut up."

⭐

Later that night, when you're lying in bed, ready to fall asleep, your eyes snap open as your phone buzzes underneath your pillow. You pull it out and press the home button, wondering who could possibly be texting you at this hour. When you do, you're surprised when it's Tsukishima's ID that pops up.

He had sent one message:

"Oh and by the way, you drool when you sleep."

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puzzleducks · 3 years

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Weirdly enough the thing that calms me down the most about the dwd news is that NOTHING we know so far adds up.

The biggest concern people have is not that its produced by Seth Rogan (though that too) but because we have the impression they're gonna take the characters that dt17 already established and give them to a completely different team.

However neither Frank, Matt, Sam (nobody who works/worked on the show in general), Tad Stones or even Stephanie have said anything regarding the news yet, the new crew isn't known for creating kids content, Jim Cummings reposted the article despite never caring for the dt reboot in the first place, they're changing studios and putting it on disney+ and it feels like a completely separate thing from dt17 altogether. Hell, we don't even know how legit it is (Seth hasn't said anything either and theres no official confirmation from Disney).

But if there's no plans in making a darkwing reboot set in the current universe why are they promoting it so much right now, why was Frank always so excited and talking abt how much dwd means to him if he has no part in this, why is LGD being treated like a backdoor pilot and why did Stephanie imply there might be a spinoff on twitter when it aired... (SPINOFF, not just reboot!!)

I have no idea how realistic this is and the chances are very slim but the best case scenario would be having two separate reboots for different platforms and audiences, though i guess we'll just have to wait and see.

I wanted to bring a new perspective since people freaked out yesterday and we don't even have any actual details

edit: this is what Ducktalks said on twitter and this matches my assumption..

#dt17 #ducktales #darkwing duck #my post #darkwing duck reboot #dwd reboot #dwd #dwd91 #disney

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topweeklyupdate · 3 years

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TØP Weekly Update #142: A Formidable Album (5/21/21)

So... how 'bout that album release week?

There's so much to cover; the release of nine new songs, the hype that's building for the World's Best Band to return to the stage, and (if we're able to come up for air) the massive speculation of what the future brings for our band.

I'm gonna get right into it, laying out my thoughts regarding this bold new album and covering all the most notable news from the week. I'll be sharing my (mostly) positive opinions about Scaled and Icy under the Read More line; I hope they're the start of a fun conversation with all of y'all who have stuck around through this last year.

Scaled and Icy Review

First, my general thoughts on the album: It's good! Really good. Do I think it's a no-skip like Vessel or a cohesive piece of art like Trench? Absolutely not! But it's also not the potential misfire that I worried that we might be getting when I first heard "Saturday" (more on that later); I think all of the songs are at least good, and some of them are downright great tracks that hold up with anything else that our band has ever released. It is also indisputably very different, but I think that generally works pretty well. Many of the songs evoke '60s rock or Britpop sounds and structures that you can tell Tyler is still trying to navigate, but I think he does a very solid job at adapting them to suit his strengths- namely his lyricism and knack for melody- rather than change to suit them. Unfortunately, this does result in a bit of square-peg-in-round-hole syndrome at times; most of the rap verses on the album feel like they're here just to fulfill an obligation to fans who would be mad if they weren't here, and most of the songs that use them are the weakest ones in the project.

"Good Day" plays a major role in getting the rest of the album to work as well as it does. Its gradual ramp-up, introducing the sound that will be used throughout the rest of the album. Its playfulness belies its message about how one can project a somewhat false optimism for oneself in the midst of tragedy: the type of dark stuff in a bright package that Tyler is so so good at. It's perhaps not an instant classic, but I am excited to see how it comes across when it's eventually used as a show-opener. 9/10

I've of course already discussed "Shy Away"; an anthemic, inimitably catchy track that I just wish had a bit more going on under the hood. Still going to be so good to hear thousands of voices scream "An 'I LOVE YOU' that isn't words!" someday. 9.5/10

"Choker" definitely took a little bit to grow on me. I think part of that was a bit of disappointment from over-inflated expectations and the environment I was in when I first heard it. With further listens, I fall more and more in love with the melody of the song... well, most of it. Like the rest of this album, the biggest weakness in the song is when Tyler tries to tick the box of having a rap verse; it just feels really out of place, unfinished, and almost amateurish, and it doesn't end the song on the note that it really should. Without it, it'd be one of my favorites on the album; with it, "Choker" is a solid 8.5/10.

Speaking of unfinished-sounding songs really hurt by their rap verse: "The Outside". There's a definite something to the vibe of the song, but that seemingly nonsensical verse is one of the two weakest parts of the entire project for me. The way the song meanders only adds to the feeling that there wasn't as much energy and attention paid to it compared to other parts of the project. It's pretty easily my least favorite track on Scaled and Icy, and the only one I might regularly skip. I've also seen plenty of people saying it's the best song on the album, so please tell me why I'm wrong! 6.5/10

"Saturday", as mentioned above, had me really nervous about this album. Like "Choker", it's grown on me a bit since I first heard it, in part because it fits better with the context of the rest of the album. However, this one really does feel undercooked lyrically and overreliant on the novelty of using a disco-inspired sound that seems to chase trends more than almost any other TØP track. The inclusion of that very sweet audio clip from Jenna boosts the song in some ways, but also adds to the disappointment in others; there are many other songs on this project that would be more worth surrendering time watching Friends. Thankfully, those come next. 7/10

"Never Take It" is fascinating. I never thought I'd hear a Rolling Stones-style song from Tyler Joseph featuring a gd guitar solo of all things, and it actually sounds pretty great. However, I also predict that this song will see some of the greatest critical scrutiny out of all the songs on the album. The lyrics seem to be Tyler's criticism of the media for playing up division in our society, but he's extremely vague when discussing which entities are spreading said division and ultimately recommends that people "educate yourself, but never too much". I'll be honest: maybe it's the fact that it sounds like something my dad would listen to, but it feels like this would get tons of play on Fox News. Since it makes specific reference to the events of last summer, it's hard not to feel like song is at least partially inspired by Tyler's brush with cancellation last year. Maybe I'm reading too deeply into it, but those reservations come from the song's lack of specificity, which is an issue of songwriting more than politics. They hold me back from truly loving a song that still manages to be one of the most exciting the band has ever put out. 8.5/10

"Mulberry Street" seems like the perfect realization of the entire album's intended tone. It is so pleasant, so lush while also simply produced, full of great lyrics, metaphors, and imagery. It really brings the whole project together, even if it's missing That One Line to really move this up to the top tier of the canon. 9.5/10

"Formidable" is the best song on the album and one of two songs I would truly rank in the top tier of the band's canon. Extremely pleasant and brimming with well-crafted lines to make your heart swoon. Jenna (and Rosie) is (are) a lucky gal(s). Or is it about Josh? Who's to say? 10/10

"Bounce Man" is just plain wild. I think Tyler's smuggling someone to Mexico to escape the feds? The playfulness of it all really covers up any frustration I might have with the clarity; it makes it clear that there's not really stakes here, just vibes. 8.5/10

"No Chances" sees the album take a turn that I'm sure the Reddit Clique is going to have an absolute field day with; it and "Redecorate" both sound quite different from the rest of the album and evoke enough elements of Trench to make me think that's it's actually possible that all this 'SAI is Propaganda' stuff might actually have something to it... until I actually pick apart the lyrics, then I'm even more confused. The song has some of the best rapping on the album, though that's not saying much (the feng shui line is a groaner right out the gate) and the gentle pre-chorus is really pleasant. I still haven't made up my mind on whether the chorus is effective or just plain goofy. This one might get worse or better on repeat listens, impossible to say for now. 7.5/10

"Redecorate" rounds out the album by opening with a Clancy quote (Tyler, you bastard), firmly setting this as a coda to Trench more than the album we just listened to. The rest of the song is really storytelling, with Tyler describing a bunch of people who are struggling deeply. The idea of "redecorating" here stands for how they are faced with the option to clean and resort their own spaces and lives or leave that to their loved ones to do after they're gone. By the time it gets to the album's name drop, you begin to wonder how much of this is potential autobiographical of the last year. It's moving stuff, a callback to some of the great strengths of the band's discography. 10/10

If I average those scores all up, this project ranks below almost every album among the Pilots discography on my rating scale, very narrowly edging out Self-Titled. That's still a very solid 8.6. Scaled and Icy is a very good album on first listen. We'll see how I feel about it after having a little more time to sit with it, but I've rambled enough: let's move through the rest of the week's news.

Other News

Of course, there was a lot else going on this week! To accompany the release of "Saturday", Zane Lowe over at Apple Music dropped an interview with Tyler. As usual, Zane did a pretty solid job of getting to the heart of the craft and the creation process. However, Tyler also wound up skirting a lot of the questions to just talk more about how much he loves being a dad, which makes me happy; if the cost of getting a little less attention and mental energy devoted to the music is that little girl getting all of his attention, that's honestly preferable for me.

The album rollout is not even close to over. Later today, the concert will be streamed live. It's our first real performance that we've gotten from the band since 2019, but the previews that we've seen have completely exceeded any of my expectations, and really anything that we've seen from the band. It appears that they've transformed the entire arena (which I think is the ol' Schott at Ohio State) into a whole TØP world, with different sets laden with Easter eggs and a cast of backup dancers. If the website can hold up to the traffic (and I acknowledge that might be a big ask), this could really live up to Tyler's promise of this being the best livestreamed concert ever.

Oh, and this guy dyed his hair pink.

What a time to be a fan. Catch you all tomorrow.

Power to the local dreamer.

|-/

#twenty one pilots #scaled and icy #tyler joseph #josh dun #good day #shy away #choker #the outside #saturday #never take it #mulberry street #formidable #bounce man #no chances #redecorate #top weekly update

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girl4music · 3 years

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I'm saving this in my bookmarks. I have a lot more to say about it and need to gather my thoughts on it so I can clearly and concisely express what I want to say without insulting someone else. It's a very controversial topic of discussion after all. But one that must be discussed nonetheless.

------------------------------------------

"but the misconception you must accept that you have an addiction in order to change your relationship with drugs and alcohol, is harmful."

It is very harmful. It's similiar to constantly believing you're mentally ill when you have a mental illness. That's not going to help you get mentally well. Addiction is a mental illness. Maybe 12-step AA programs should understand what's necessary for neurodiversity first before understanding what's necessary for recovery. It makes total sense to me why DEMI LOVATO is fairing better with moderation management methods over total drug/alcohol abstinence. But that's because I understand her well, not because I understand addiction well. I just think... Neurodiversity > Recovery. And, in my mind, associating "recovery" with the term "sobriety" is more dangerous than associating the term "California sober" with "recovery" in my opinion. But what do I know? 😑

"This goes against the popular belief that consuming drugs and alcohol and being in recovery are mutually exclusive, an idea that is deeply embraced by some in the addiction treatment field."

Yes, because the addiction treatment field wants you to be free of your addictions. 🙄 They don't want you to be free of your addictions or your mental illnesses. They want you to RELY ON THEM so that the only "treatment" you can get for your addictions and mental illnesses forces you to continue said "treatment" with them. So that it's a never-ending cycle.

"The idea that recovery is synonymous with sobriety is closely tied to 12-step fellowship programs where step 1 is to admit you’re powerless over drugs and alcohol and the ultimate goal is abstinence."

Exactly. So YOU'RE powerless to make any decisions for yourself that do not include what THEY say is best for YOU. Which is an ultimate and unrealistic goal of TOTAL ABSTINENCE.

"But if you ask your friends, neighbors, or loved ones outside of the addiction field what they think it means to be in “recovery”, most will associate the term with total sobriety."

Yes, and they want to keep it that way because it makes big $$$$$.

Listen people. I'm gonna lay it out in plain English for you

Demi is not saying her "California sober" method is everyone's method. That it is the correct method for everyone dealing with addiction or/and mental illness. In fact she's made it pretty damn clear no one should think or believe it is or should be. All she is saying is that it's a method that she's found to work for her. And is it working? Well, only time and experience with it will tell. I don't know if it will for her longterm but it certainly seems to be working for her at the moment. And that's all that matters for the moment. But, for me personally, I think neurodiversity should be put first over recovery because all people aren't the same and therefore the same method for recovery will not work for all people. There are different pathways to take and different options to try. Some not so popular than others. All Demi is doing is trying those "not so popular" methods out because the one that everybody says, thinks and believes will work did not work for her at all. Sobriety did not work for her and, forgive me for using this metaphor, that's a hard pill to swallow for some people who hold the term "sober" so closely to their heart and dote on it like it's the love of their life.

I have genuine faith that this moderation management method (her "California sober") will work for her. Because, like I said... I know and understand Demi very well. I know that extremes are not right for her. And total abstinence is just another extreme for her to get addicted to on top of her other addictions. The woman needs balance in her life. She knows she needs balance in her life. So therefore she's trying that "balance" with her issues with drug and alcohol addiction. She believes it will work. And I think she's right. Will it work for somebody else? Probably not. But it's a viable pathway to take and option to try in any case. What more harm could moderation management do to some people than the harm total abstinence can do to some people? Because I definetly say the latter is far more dangerous.

We, as a society, need to get more comfortable with the term "weaning" regarding substance addiction first of all. You would not make a baby go without their mother's milk or baby formula in order to get them on to eating solid foods. Of course not. You would wean them into it. So why isn't this area of logic applied to substance addiction? It should be! That's my take on it and I want to develop this area of logic further as I learn more and more about the mental illness of addiction and substance abuse in general. I know very little about addiction. I don't know a great deal about mental illness either but more so than just what little I know about addiction specifically. But what I do know and understand very well is neurodiversity and the relationship between the external and the internal. Meaning the relationship between the environment and the human mind/body. And my argument for what to do for mental illness (and addiction, most likely) is that you must get to know and understand this relationship first before tackling recovery in any aspect of life. The relationship between "I" and "other" is extremely important for interaction of any kind with people, things, substances, ideologies, philosophies, stimulants... Everything. And I just don't believe any "program" or "treatment" for addiction recovery or mental health recovery can be without the knowing and understanding of this relationship. This primary relationship with "I" and "other" and all interactions between them.

Now for someone who lives to such extremes to the point that they are misdiagnosed with bipolar disorder (DEMI LOVATO)... It is quite evident that the key is to lessen those extremes. And the way to do that is by balancing the extremes. Not by completely taking all of them away.

One extreme for her is a total obsession with perfection and with being the best at everything, looking as good/pretty as possible. Essentially constantly setting the bar higher and higher to reach with each grasp. That is an addiction for her.

Another extreme for her is disregarding any and all expectations or goals, rebelling against every law or moral or teaching whatsoever... Basically not giving a crap about anything. Not even her own well being,... to the point where she's results to substance abuse just to keep going. To have some kind of high.

Now throw in a strict schedual of night and day, around-the-clock restriction, limitation and control into the mix and have that happen for 365 days a year and ask yourself will it lessen any extreme for Demi or will it just add another extreme on the top of it? One would absolutely lose their mind trying to keep up with all of this while being expected to perform to any degree whatsoever as a "star". One is going to fail. More than fail. One is going to seriously impact their health. One is going to be on death's door. So even though I don't know and understand addiction or mental illness very well, don't say I don't understand the tremendous effects it can have on neurodivergent people. I know and understand more than any average person would ever fucking know or understand. I know and understand Demi. And I am saying moderation management is the best method for Demi's substance abuse recovery because her addiction is not substances. Or rather - not primarily substances. Her addiction - her primary addiction - is to be PERFECT. She needs to tackle that addiction before her addictions with substances. With drugs and alcohol. And the best way for her to do that is to find balance in every aspect of her life. With her food, with her career, with her music, with her interactions with EVERYTHING. If she can tackle that addiction and wean it down to where she doesn't need to feel like she needs to be so perfect all the time and put herself through the ringer with her career... Then her issues with substance abuse will most likely disappear by themselves because she wouldn't need those substances or stimulants to cope anymore. There's no cause for it. No trigger. So, yes. She's right. Moderation management is the correct method for her. And it's proven to be so far, so let's not villify her for it just yet. Let's wait and see what the results are first. Like you would with any scientific study. And if it does turn out to be that you were right... Then you can make your conclusions on whether it's a method that should or shouldn't be used or associated with drug/alcohol addiction recovery ever again. I personally don't think so. I think she's got it now because, with Demi, it's primarily a mental health issue with her feeling or thinking that she always needs to be perfect. I think if that addiction goes away, then the addiction with the drugs and alcohol will go away on its own. There will be no need for a "recovery plan" at all for it because she's got the stimulants that she needs to remain in a healthy and balanced mindset.

Demi's effectively killing two birds with one stone. She couldn't even kill one before her overdose happened and that was not her fault. It was the fault of the people constantly around her making sure she never had any stimulants whatsoever. Leaving her powerless to ever get "mentally well" in the first place. Her last recovery team left her in one big jam. They took all the stimulants or coping mechanisms away to deal with her addiction issues with perfection and body image and eating disorders. They refused to wean her and it only made the situation worse. I mean what did they think was gonna happen? NOBODY could get "sober" or "clean" or "recovered" or "mentally well" from that level of restriction, limitation and control, let alone DEMI LOVATO, a "star" who was given access to everything under the sun as a child and was taught and told to be perfect at the same time.

Oh yes, I totally get it. And that's why I can say with complete conviction that, this time, Demi's got it now. She's got a handle on every addiction or mental health issue plaguing her because she's gone right to the root to where it all started to begin with and she's weaning herself. 👏 And you know, if you cut the head off a snake, the whole body dies along with it without ever needing to take a second chop. Apply that awfully corny metaphor to all I've just said and you'll totally get it too. Addiction and mental health recovery is not a one-size fits all method. There are other methods. Demi's just trying those other methods and being publically transparent about it. She should be respected, not vilified. I'm done.

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fullmarvelheart · 3 years

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Monsters & Pancakes

Pairing: Avengers x Enhanced!OFC

Word Count: 2,462

Warnings: Swearing, mentions of death and familial loss.

A/N: Welcome to Chapter 3! I hope you all enjoy the story as well as the characters! Image is not my own. All rights go to the original creator. Sorry this took so long to get out! I hope you enjoy reading it!

Series Masterlist

I slowly begin to wake and curl more into the couch. My body feels less heavy than it usually does, more alert. That alone has me feeling uneasy before I realize I'm on my couch... not my bed.

I shoot up in terror knowing fully well that he did something to me, that Loki made me pass out. Though, the fast movement throws me off balance and I end up tumbling to the floor. While pushing myself up with a groan, I hear hurried footsteps rush towards me on the floor.

"What in Odin's name are you doing on the floor?" He chides somewhere behind me.

"What did you do to me?" I sneer while turning towards his voice.

"Just a simple sleeping incantation." He tells me while nonchalantly crossing his arms.

"Why?" I growl while forcing myself to stand. He sighs while rolling his eyes.

"For one, I was brought, somehow, to this place, against my will might I add. So, my trust in you was not and is not very high. Another reason I kept you asleep, after I explored to make sure it was safe, was because it appeared that you needed it." He explains in a very frustrated tone. I take a deep breath.

"I guess we're even then." He looks at me curiously. "Both being kidnapped by the other..." I elaborate.

"Not quite..." He states while I cock an eyebrow. "Your name... I still do not know it."

I sigh while trying to run a hand through my very knotted dirty-blond hair.

"People call me 'Saddie'." I tell him while walking to my room to retrieve my brush.

"You didn't answer my question." He huffs.

"Yes, I did." The retort comes out more bitter than intended but I don't care to change it.

"I asked for your name, not a nickname. I told you my name without the added titles."

"'Of Asgard' isn't an added title?" He groans at the sarcastic remark while I carefully brush the wavy tresses.

"Your name?" He asks again, though annoyed.

I sigh, not wanting to say it out loud.

"No need to tell me, you just did." He chuckles darkly from the hallway.

"What?!" I yell.

"Don't worry, Sadira, I think it's a very unique name." I feel my face grow hot with anger and notice the lightbulbs starting to flicker.

I storm out of my room only to spot him standing frozen in the hallway, staring at the flickering bulbs.

"Do NOT use that name!" He turns around to face me quickly. "And stop reading my DAMN MIND!" I scream.

He holds his hands up in surrender.

"I give you my word, not to do that again." He tells me.

I scoff.

"I don't know if I believe you."

I brush past him and make my way to the kitchen. I haven't eaten since before I left for work, however long ago that was. As the thought of food crosses my mind, my stomach growls painfully and I resist the urge to groan because of it. God, I want something sweet.

As I begin to prep my meal. I see Loki leaning on the doorway, just observing.

"Do you want anything?" I ask, my head deep into the refrigerator.

"Sure." I hear in reply. "As long as you don't poison it." I half-chuckle.

"You never know..."

I begin to pull ingredients together and place them on the counter.

"Why did you teleport into the middle of the street?" I ask while focused on the food in front of me.

"Huh?"

"Well, you suddenly appear on Earth in the very early morning, looking very upset or unnerved for whatever reason, and then appear to want to blend in. Seeing as you're wearing... what do you call it... ah, Midgardian clothes, instead of what looked like a cape when I first saw you. It looks to me like you're on the run." I explain.

"You saw that?"

"I saw everything. The beam that brought you here and everything that followed until you spotted me." I say, while waving a spatula around as I talk.

"But why did you think I was on the run? Maybe you are yourself." My eyes snap up to meet his. "You have nothing personal in here. No pictures of family... friends, no images at all. Not even a plant." He pries while moving closer to me.

"Because I have none."

"What?"

"I have no friends or family." I growl while tightly gripping onto the spatula.

I move my eyes back onto the food I'm preparing in order to prevent the tears in my eyes from spilling. And I try so hard as to push them back.

"Now, are you on the run?" I ask through gritted teeth.

"In a sense... Yes. Are they actively looking for me? No. No harm will come to you because of it."

I let out a breath I didn't know I was holding in at his explanation.

"Who are you hiding from?" He asks, carefully.

"Too many people to list." I chuckle darkly as I put the mixture into a pan. "Mainly HYDRA though. Unfortunately, S.H.I.E.L.D. hasn't been able to completely rid the world of them." I grumble.

"Ugh, S.H.I.E.L.D." He grunts with such distaste.

"I take it you've encountered them." I state while looking at him from the corner of my eye.

He hums in acknowledgement while I flip the item in the pan.

"Well I haven't, but I'm grateful for them nonetheless. If it wasn't for S.H.I.E.L.D, HYRDA would still have me. And I don't want to imagine the horrors that would come from that."

I begin to plate what I had prepared before washing and cutting up some strawberries.

"What is your favorite fruit?" I ask faintly.

"What?"

"Do you have a favorite fruit?" I ask again, though slightly annoyed.

"No, none that I know from Midgard." He says, very confused.

I hum while taking a can of whipped cream from the fridge.

After stacking two pancakes, I drizzle the cut strawberries on top before adding a spiral of whipped cream and a drizzle of maple syrup. I pass the finished plate to him along with a fork and knife before doing the same to my plate. I walk to the fridge and put all the ingredients away, but not before spraying some of the cream into my mouth.

I look back at Loki and notice he wears a disgusted expression.

"What? My house, my rules. And besides, it's for good luck." I defend while stabbing my fork into a piece of a pancake.

He scoffs but says nothing. I shake my head and continue eating. My thoughts begin to wander to all the events that occurred today, when I gasp.

Loki gives me a strange look as I run over to the living room and turn the TV on the first news station I find. The Q-Ship is still being played all over each network with the headlines reading "Attack on New York City". Various "experts" talk and give their predictions of what it means or what's going to happen. I scowl at the stupidity of those so-called "experts". The really have NO idea what the hell is going on.

Tony Stark's face shows up on the screen as the title reads "Missing". I hope that he's still alive, still in the fight. I know we'll need him. I mean, they'll need him.

Hpmh "we'll"...?

I am NOT getting involved in this anymore.

The image then changes to Cull Obsidian and Ebony Maw giving their oh-so nauseating "rejoice because of our presence" speech. I growl at their faces immediately causing the TV and the lights to begin to flicker.

"You know the Black Order." It's not a question but a statement. I turn to face Loki who has an uncertain look on his face.

I sigh, but say nothing to confirm or deny before looking back at the TV. What's the point? The answer is already known.

"Saddie... How do you know them?" He says inching closer to me. I can feel the spike of his heart-rate, I can feel his fear as if it was my own. Though, some of it is my own fear too.

"I guess that's who you're running from." I half-heartedly say with a chuckle. Though, I'm not even sure I'm correct.

"How do you know Thanos?" He asks slowly, cautiously, scared of a reaction. My reaction.

And he should be, because at the mention of his name, I begin to shake uncontrollably.

"Please... Please, don't. You don't want to know." I croak, shutting my eyes from the new tears in my eyes pushing to be set free.

Before either of us can do anything, the screen changes to "Possible Alien Attack in Scotland".

"Now why the hell would they go to Scotland?" I ponder out-loud with tears still rimming my eyes.

My eyes widen in slight fear before I pivot to face Loki.

"When was the last time you faced the Black Order?" I question quickly, harshly brushing off the lone tear that fell.

He flinches from my sudden actions, but remains silent.

"You're running from Thanos and his children. What happened to cause you to run?" I push because I need to know. If this is what I think it is, I'm not safe anymore, no one is.

Still there is silence...

"Tell me!" I scream at him.

His face scrunches briefly before he sighs.

"The day I arrived on Midgard. Ragnarok happened to my realm, Asgard. Me and my brother, Thor, we escaped with our people. Then Thanos arrived, he wanted the Tesseract. Inside was one of the six Infinity Stones. They're-"

"I know what they are. But did you just give one of the stones to him?! Why would you even consider that?!" It can't be the same Thor as... No, no it's just a similar name. Focus Saddie!

"I didn't! Not at first! He already had one! He had the Power Stone, and he had my brother! And he was torturing him for the stone! You have no idea what that's like. To bargain for the life of someone you care about!" His words send a dagger to my heart and I feel the burn of tears in my eyes again.

"I have every idea what that is like! That is why I have no family left!" I scream, the lights start flickering again.

Silence envelops the room again except for our raging breaths slowly calming down from our shouting.

"Balance... That's what he calls it. Where there is an entire population, Thanos will leave half. Two planets in a system, one remains untouched. Two siblings..." I trail off and only one tear rolls down my cheek. "You were the sibling that should have died... weren't you?" My voice soft with sadness and understanding.

He says nothing, he doesn't need to.

"You need to tell your brother you're alive." I say choking back a sob.

"What? I can not simply do that! You have no ide-"

"STOP SAYING THAT! I lost my twin sister because of that monster!" I scream. "I am in your brother's shoes. I mourn the loss of my sister everyday! I blame myself! He needs to know, he needs to know you're still alive!" The tears have been rolling in uncontrollable waves down my face before I inhale a deep breath and exhale, slowly willing myself to calm down.

"There are more Infinity Stones on Earth... That is the only possible explanation for his presence here." I reason while the tears slow.

I kneel down and extend my palm on the ground. Reaching my power outward, I let myself connect to the Earth. It's over-powering and extremely painful to do because of my limited practice, but I persist.

"What are you-"

I let myself slip into the feel of the world, the magnitude of power it possesses, but I feel it. One form of power that exists above all else on this planet. The only Infinity Stone on Earth. I gasp, call back my abilities, and fall backwards. The power surges, then every electric source in my house flickers to black. I sit in the dark silence as I still can feel the stone somewhere in New York, somewhere close by. The power goes back on and I turn to a stunned Loki.

Tapping into the city's power supply, I try to recharge my energy as quickly as I can before sitting up, and pushing past the annoying man in my living room.

"Where are you going?" He calls out as I throw the door open to my room.

"There's an Infinity Stone still on Earth. Either the Black Order, or Thanos will be there. I'm going." I tell him as I drag a chest from under my bed.

"What?! Are you mad?!"

"Possibly..." I mutter to him as I throw the lid open.

Possibly? Try undeniably!

Yeah, I'm so not getting involved in this... dammit.

Inside the chest various knives, daggers, and even my bo-staff lie waiting to be used. Most of the metals are specifically designed for me by the Mad Titan himself. Smiling to myself at the comfort my weapons bring, I use my power to throw Loki out of the room and shut the door. After locking it, I begin to change, but not into one of the garbs I wore while my sister was still alive.

Instead, I slip on the suit HYDRA had made for me before I escaped. It's a navy catsuit that almost resembles Black Widow's own one. I zip it up to my neck then pull on black lace-up boots and my black fingerless gloves. I arm myself to the teeth with several small knives, four daggers (the two largest, from my time with HYDRA, rest on my thighs), and the bo-staff that extends into my favorite duel-bladed weapon.

Sealing the chest back up and returning it under my bed, I unlock and open the door to which Loki stumbles in. Apparently, leaning on the door was smart. A very, very, smart idea indeed.

He scoffs at my thoughts when he regains his composure. Though, I recall telling him not to read my mind anymore, I have more important things to do than to yell at him. Instead, I settle for an eye roll.

Looking me up and down as I place my long hair into a high ponytail, his mouth hangs open as he stares. I ignore the goosebumps that erupt under his gaze. Wow, do I need more male interaction or what? Mentally chastising myself, I clear my throat, bringing his attention back to me, or to my eyes.

"Please don't do anything destructive while I'm gone." I practically beg before teleporting away.

Chapter 4

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