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lemonflavoreddishsoap · 7 months

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no one asked for this but I'm writing it anyway. Also time doesn't exist in this thing, that or Ghiaccio's computer time travelled

Ghiaccio with an S/O who plays Papa's Freezeria on his computer

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This was it. The biggest step in your relationship thus far. No, not marriage.

Ghiaccio agreed to share his computer with you.

You didn't have one of your own and amongst other expenses you just never got around to buying one. So, with a lot of deliberation and building trust, he sent you a message saying that you could make an account on his. You would have to wait until he got home though, so he could show you how.

Unfortunately, you either didn't read or disregarded that last part of the message, and with a childlike glee flung yourself to his desk, loudly click clacking the keys and brute forcing your way into figuring out his password. You must have woken it up from it's sleep because there was nothing open when you got in. Then, you sat back and tapped your chin for a while...what exactly were you going to do first?

Then, like a prophetic vision from God, a wave of nostalgia brushed across your body, making you literally shiver. A flash of color and music and ice cream played in your mind. The name "Papa..." escaped your lips in a longing sigh.

In a flash, you've got google open, searching up Coolmathgames. Holy shit. HOLY SHIT. THE LINK IS PURPLE. Racing through the website, briefly noticing an account signed in, and nearly breaking the mouse as you clicked on the link for "Papa's Freezeria".

....HE HAS A SAVE FILE!! RANK 20!??? When the hell does he have the time to play this??

Despite your sense of curiosity absolutely HOWLING, you knew you had already snooped more than enough, so making your own save file it is, you suppose.

Has it been an hour? Maybe two? Who knows, there's no use in me asking anyways because the time certainly hasn't crossed your mind. You're glued to the game, having a nearly perfected strategy executed with each and every cartoon-y costumer. You probably don't even remember whose computer you're playing on - this reality and the reality of Freezeria have entirely merged to you.

At least, that's the case before you feel one hand clamp down on the back of your chair, and another landing on top of your own hand that's gripping the mouse.

"I thought I told you to wait?"

Ghiaccio is clearly restraining himself, there's a rasp in his voice that you only hear when he's giving his all to not shout. Your lips are sealed shut, unsure how to justify your current situation. He must have then taken a good look at the screen because next thing he said was-

"And why the FUCK are you playing THAT!?"

Shit, you legit didn't have an answer. As he's standing there giving you a weirded out look, you remember the hypocrisy in his anger. You stutter wildly, still trying to reach for some explanation, as you duplicate the tab to start the game again - you swear you see his face drop. You point at his save file with a "huh!!" sound, and suddenly he's red in the face, hand retreating from on top of yours as if the contact suddenly burned him.

"Fine!! Whatever. Just finish the fuck up and..." he groans. It always feels good to embarrass him, and plus you know he can never stay mad at you for long.

"I will, I'm almost done with this day. Last order," you promise, clicking back to your original tab and getting right back to work. Ghiaccio has nothing else to do but stand and watch you play. What you don't see is his face slowly contorting in disgust as you sloppily dump toppings over the dessert.

"That's not how you place the cherries!!! That one's supposed to be centered, and the other two have to be NEATLY placed apart! They're gonna fucking hate it!" Ghiaccio exclaims, stabbing the screen with his index finger. You roll your eyes, it definitely doesn't surprise you that he's a perfectionist in this video game.

You both watch in anticipation as the costumer tastes their ice cream, and when a 72% score appears over the "top station" button you let out a cheer. You swivel your chair to face Ghiaccio and gesture to the screen, "see? they liked it!!"

He scoffs at the score, "it sure wasn't deserved."

"What!?" you put a hand on your chest in fake-hurt, "how dare you. Louie would never treat me like this!!"

Ghiaccio blinks at you with wide eyes, needing several long seconds to process what you just said.

"...Since when were you on a one-name basis with Papa Louie!?"

#this is pure crack #im so sorry #la squadra #jjba x reader #la squadra x reader #ghiaccio x reader #IDK WHY I WROTE THIS. BUT I DID. AND IT WAS FUN #imagine cheating on ghiaccio with papa louie /j #I hope this is at least entertaining LMAO #i started this semi seriously and then gave up

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babygirl-diaz · 6 months

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No Nut November (Buddie Fanfic)

((Based on this prompt by @blurredbuddie))

Buck blamed Albert. It was his fault that he was currently sleeping on the couch rather than his very comfortable bed snuggling up to his very cuddly boyfriend. You see, Albert was going through a nasty breakup and had sworn off sex. Except that wasn’t enough for him. No. The 25-year-old had to rope Buck into his awful plan. It was November and Albert had come across “No Nut November” while browsing Reddit. His curiosity got the best of him and he decided to engage in the ridiculous challenge. He then turned it into a bet with Buck, whose only brain cell wasn’t working at the time and it only heard the part where Albert said, “I will wash your Jeep for a year,” and immediately agreed to the bet. He doesn’t even remember what Albert would get if he won!

But anyway, back to Buck’s current predicament. How did he end up on the couch? Well, he told his boyfriend about the bet, which went about as well as you would expect.

“You what?” Eddie asked after he tried to take their make-out session further and go down on Buck.

“I am abstaining from sex this month,” Buck simply told him with a shrug.

Eddie, who was currently on his knees next to Buck’s junk, narrowed his eyes at him. “And why would you do that?”

Buck dragged the comforter over his legs and slinked back into the bed. “Because I may have made a bet with Albert that I can last through No Nut November longer than him.”

“Not nut what?” Eddie asked, sitting back on his hunches. Buck knew he was trying to suppress his frustration and anger.

“No Nut November. It’s a challenge people engage in during the month of November where they abstain from coming for the entire month,” Buck explained.

“And you two dumbasses couldn’t have participated in Movember for a good cause?” Eddie asked, letting his anger slowly show. “At least that would have been sexy.”

“But-”

“OR you could have even participated in that writing challenge Chris is doing this year!’ Eddie finally blew off his top.

“But then I couldn’t have made a bet with Albert and potentially won a year’s worth of free cleaning for my Jeep.”

“What?!” Eddie practically yelled. “You decided to deprive me of my nine-inch goodness for a whole ass month so that you would get a year’s worth of free car washes?”

“Do you know how expensive car washes are in L.A.?” Buck asked.

“And what does Albert get if he wins?”

Buck blinked at Eddie before shrugging one shoulder. “I don’t remember.”

“You don’t remember?” Eddie repeated after him.

“I don’t remember,” Buck confirmed.

“Get out,” Eddie said bluntly.

Buck balked at him. “What? This is my room,”

“I don’t care,” Eddie replied. “Get out.”

And that’s how Buck ended up on the couch of his own apartment.

Buck thought Eddie would still be mad at him the nextmorning, but then he woke up to the smell of breakfast and coffee. Confused, he went to the kitchen and found Eddie there making pancakes.

“Good morning, babe,” Eddie said without even looking up from the pancakes.

“Morning?” Buck replied, confused.

“Have a seat,” Eddie told him. “Breakfast is just about ready.”

“Eddie, you’re not mad at me anymore?” Buck asked, surprised, as he took a seat at the table.

Eddie brought the breakfast over and then the cups of coffee. Buck couldn’t help but notice he was walking funny. Putting a little too much emphasis on his swaying his hips. And then instead of taking the chair beside Buck, Eddie sat down on his lap and wrapped his arms around Buck’s neck.

“Uh…Eddie?” Buck instinctively wrapped his arms around Eddie’swaist, but he was confused nonetheless. “Why are you sitting on my lap?”

“Can’t a man sit on his boyfriend’s lap when he feels like it?” Eddie asked. His voice was low, but innocent. His actions, however, were anything but innocent. He was currently rubbing his ass against Buck’s clothed dick.

Buck was usually oblivious, but this time, he understood Eddie’s plan fairly quickly. “Eddie,” Buck warned him. “I know what you’re doing.”

“What am I doing?” Eddie looked at him with those big brown eyes of his that would have Buck committing murder.

“You’re trying to get me to lose my bet with Albert.”

A moan escaped Eddie’s lips as he probably felt Buck getting hard in his boxers. “Buck…” His voice was breathless, like Buck was fucking him already.

Buck lost himself in the sounds Eddie was making. His grip tightened on Eddie’s waist and he couldn’t help but thrust his hips against Eddie’s ass. But then he realized what he was doing, and he stood up abruptly, causing Eddie to fall to the floor.

“Buck!” Eddie yelled.

“Sorry, baby, I promise I’ll make it up to you.” With that, he made a run towards the door, grabbing his keys and shoes along the way. When he was safely in his Jeep, Buck realized he had nowhere to go. He had just made a run from his own apartment. But then he remembered he had a gym bag in the back, and thanked whatever god was out there for his laziness.

Buck made his way to the station, where he could shower and get changed into his dirty uniform. He didn’t have his phone on him, which meant he couldn’t even text Eddie and grovel for forgiveness.

When he reached the station, all eyes were on him. Someone even wolf-whistled, as he did a walk of shame through the station, without having actually had sex the previous night.

Bobby was the first one to approach him with a confused look plastered on his face. “Uh, Buck? Why are you parading through my firehouse in your t-shirt and boxers?”

“Long story. You don’t wanna know,” Buck replied tiredly, and hung his head.

“You dropped Eddie on his ass and made a run out of your own apartment?!” Hen’s voice rang through the station.

Buck’s eyes widened, and he immediately shushed her. “Are you trying to embarrass me in front of the entire station?”

“That ship has sailed already.” Hen eyed him from top to bottom and raised an eyebrow.

“What do you mean he dropped Eddie on his- his-”

“It’s okay, Cap, you can say ass.” Hen sympathetically put a hand on Bobby’s shoulder, gaining herself a glare from him. She removed her hand immediately and put it up in surrender. “I don’t know the whole story, but I just got a call from a very pissed-off Eddie telling me that Buck ran out on him.

“Exactly how pissed off was he?” Buck cringed at the thought.

“I said very, didn’t I?” Hen replied. “But I would be too if Karen ran out on me after dropping me on my ass.” With that, she broke out into laughter. “I can only imagine what that scene must have been like.”

“Yes, yes, laugh it up at my misery.” Buck huffed. “I’m gonna go take a shower. And do we have any cereal? I am starving.”

“We have bread, and I can make you some eggs,” Bobby told him.

“He really is your favorite!” Hen accused him. “You never offer to make us eggs when we come to the station hungry.”

“Well, I’m in emotional distress right now,” Buck informed her. “And thanks, Bobby, that will be great.”

“Your boyfriend is the one in emotional distress,” Hen pointed out. “You are in deep shit.”

Buck didn’t need to be reminded of that. He waved her off and hit the showers instead.

Buck was digging into his breakfast when a loud “EVAN BUCKLEY!” reverberated through the station. Oh shit.

Footsteps headed up the stairs, and Buck almost felt his heart leap out of his throat. He abruptly stood up from the chair and put his hands up. “Look, I can explain.”

“Explain how you dropped me on my ass in the middle of your kitchen and then ran out like a coward?”

“Yeahhh… It doesn’t sound so good when you put it like that.” Buck cringed. “I didn’t hurt you, did I?” He asked with genuine concern in his voice.

“You hurt my pride!” Eddie said dramatically.

“I’m sorry, you were just rubbing yourself on me and I need to abstain and I could-” Buck stopped talking when he realized they were getting an audience. “Hey, folks.” He waved awkwardly. “Maybe give us some privacy?”

“Maybe you should stop talking so loudly where all of us can hear you,” Chimney told them. “And what do you mean you’re trying to abstain? Albert is trying to abstain too. Doing some kinda ridiculous challenge.” Chimney paused and then gave Buck a “Are you serious?” look. “You’re doing the challenge too, aren’t you?”

Eddie crossed his arms and raised an eyebrow at Buck. “You wanna tell them or should I?”

��I mean, we really don’t have to tell them,” Buck pointed out.

“Evan here made a bet with Albert about who will last longer without sex during the month of November,” Eddie told them.

There was silence, and then soon laughter rang through the station.

“Are you serious?” Ravi asked. “Is it even possible for you and Albert to go without sex for a day?”

“Hey, I’ve lasted a day so far,” Buck informed him, feeling a little offended.

“Even dumb and dumber would come up with a better plan.” This time, it was Chimney’s turn to tease him.

“How would you even know if Albert’s had sex or how would he know if you have?” Hen was asking the important questions and, truth be told, Buck hadn’t thought of that.

“I guess we’ll just have to believe each other,” Buck replied.

“There’s no honor among thieves,” Hen countered.

“I think it’s a good challenge,” Bobby finally provided his two cents, earning him amused looks from Hen, Chimney, and Ravi, and a glare from Eddie. “I am just saying. It’s probably healthy for both of you.”

“Thank you, Bobby!” Buck said appreciatively. “At least someone gets me.”

“What did you bet on, anyway?” Bobby continued to ask.

Eddie gave Buck an unamused look, who gulped before saying, “If I win, Albert washes my car for a year.”

“Boooooooo!” Hen, Ravi, and Chimney yelled at him and soon he was hit with plastic fruits from the table, as Buck tried to protect himself.

“You couldn’t bet on anything better?” Hen asked.

“Like a new Jeep itself,” Ravi suggested.

“We’re firefighters, not tech moguls,” Buck replied.

Everyone just rolled their eyes at him and walked away.

Once they all disappeared, Eddie came closer to Buck. “So there is no way I can convince you to fuck me?” He asked.

“Right now? I think we’ll both get fired if I do that, baby.” Buck leaned in to kiss him but Eddie turned his head away and the kiss landed on his cheek.

“Hmmm, if you’re not gonna fuck me, then you’re not getting kisses either.”

Buck hated it when Eddie used that sassy voice with him. But it also turned him on. He was not going to last the next 28 days.

Okay, so he lasted 28 days, but he wasn’t so sure when he had 25 days left. Eddie wasn’t letting up. Nope, he was even more determined to make Buck lose the bet. So on November 5, he brought out the big guns.

They were getting ready to go to bed. Eddie was already under the covers when Buck finished his nighttime ritual and came to bed. He wasn’t wearing any t-shirt like he usually wasn’t. It did things to Buck seeing him shirtless, but he controlled himself and got under the covers. Buck leaned over to kiss Eddie, who eagerly returned his kiss before lying down. They got into their usual position, with Eddie facing the window and Buck behind him with his back to the wall. But when Buck’s arm wrapped around Eddie’s waist, his hand brushed against something. Something that definitely didn’t feel like boxers. They were rough and lacey to the touch and Eddie’s hard dick was pressing against it.

“Eddie?” Buck almost choked. “Are you wearing panties?”

“Yes,” Eddie replied like he did this type of thing every day. Like Buck hadn’t begged him to wear the panties for months after he bought them for him. Like he hadn’t shoved them in the back of his dresser, telling Buck that he would never wear them in a million years.

“Why?” Buck couldn’t move his hand. It’s like it was glued to the spot on top of Eddie’s lacey panties.

“Because I felt like it,” Eddie turned around in Buck’s arms and leaned in close to his ear as he added, “...daddy.”

Buck let out a choked sound that he didn’t even realize came out of his own mouth. “What?”

“Daddy,” Eddie innocently said it again.

“Fuck,” Buck groaned and pushed Eddie against the bed and climbed on top of him, as he kissed him, pinning him to the mattress.

Eddie wrapped his legs around Buck and let out a moan into his mouth. Eddie moved his hips against Buck’s as Buck thrust against him. After breaking away from the kiss, Eddie wrapped his arms around Buck’s neck and buried his face in the crook of his neck, “Daddy,” he hoarsely whispered again.

Suddenly, the conversation with Albert rang in his ears, and Buck stopped moving. His hard on started to subside. Because having Albert’s voice ringing in his ears as he was trying to get on with his boyfriend wasn’t exactly an aphrodisiac. Eddie whined under him, and Buck’s attention shifted to him.

Buck pulled away from Eddie and looked down at him. Eddie stared back at him with swollen lips and blown eyes. Shit. Buck was getting hard again.

“I have to go.” Buck scrambled out of bed.

Eddie sat up and looked at him confused. “What?”

“I’m gonna go sleep on the couch,” Buck told him and ran out.

“Buck!” Eddie called out after him, but he didn’t stop as he shut the door, careful not to slam it and wake up Chris.

He half expected Eddie to come after him and demand answers, but he didn’t. It took awhile, but Buck fell asleep on the cold leather couch, freezing his ass off, because he was too scared to go back to the room and get a blanket.

Early the next morning, Buck woke up to find he wasn’t as cold anymore and realized that there was a comforter thrown over him. He smiled and took in Eddie’s smell that still lingered on the comforter, and fell back asleep.

They had 15 days to go in the bet, and Buck was dying and Buck knew so was Eddie. The man was desperately trying to seduce him in every way possible. But Buck was holding out strong.

Albert was visiting today, and he looked as miserable as Buck felt. “Can we call it a truce and end the bet?”

“Oh, hell no,” Buck told him. “I’ve put my relationship on the line for this! I’m seeing it to the end.”

“YOU!” Eddie’s voice rang through the loft as he stormed over to Albert with an accusatory finger pointed in his direction. “I am not a violent man, but you make me want to commit violent acts!”

Buck pulled Eddie back before he could attack Albert. “Babe, you were once part of an illegal fight club. You’re hardly non-violent,” Buck said in his ear, acutely aware that he wasn’t helping the situation.

“Hey, whoa, I just asked Buck to call it a truce and end this thing.” Albert moved back and put up his hands in front of him. “He’s the one who refuses to give up.”

Eddie turned to glare at Buck. “Is that true?”

Buck gave him a sheepish look in return. “I mean, I’ve come so far, baby. I wanna see this thing through.”

“Well, you can sleep on the couch for the rest of you life then,” Eddie huffed and walked away.

“I hate you so much,” Buck told Albert.

The very next day, Eddie took his seduction game up a notch. It was a Thursday, and it was a rare day off for both of them. Buck had spent the night at the Diaz house like he usually did, and he was looking forward to spending some quality time with his boyfriend while Chris was at school. He already knew Eddie was going to pull something, but nothing prepared him for what he actually did.

Buck was in the shower after breakfast and when he came out, he found Eddie suspiciously missing from the house. “Eddie?” Buck called out as he looked for his boyfriend. The front door was slightly open, and Buck became alert. He opened the door and went outside and stopped dead in his tracks on the front porch.

“What the-” His mouth fell open as he watched his boyfriend. His boyfriend, who was currently dressed in low-cut booty shorts that accentuated his gorgeous ass, and a crop top that showed off his delicious abs. If that wasn’t enough, he was currently washing Buck’s jeep. The shirt and booty shorts clung to his skin and the shape of his dick was visible through the shorts, so were his perky nipples through the wet shirt.

When Eddie saw Buck, he wrung the sponge all over him, spilling suds down his chest and inside his shirt.

Buck just stood there with his mouth agape and his dick hard in his sweatpants. Eddie’s display was getting the attention of the neighbors who were currently home: retired folks and stay-at-home parents.

“What are you doing?” Buck asked, going over to him. “It’s cold out here. You’re gonna freeze your nuts off.”

“Well, you wanted someone to wash your Jeep, so I am doing you a service,” Eddie told him.

“In clothes you borrowed from a high school cheerleader?” Buck asked.

Eddie smirked and trailed his index finger down Buck’s chest. “What? You don’t like the outfit?”

“Oh no, I love it.” Buck let out a low growl and dug his fingernails into Eddie’s waist. “I just don’t like others watching you.”

“Jealous of 80-year-olds?” Eddie chuckled.

“80-year-olds have eyes too and they sure like to stare,” Buck told him. He put his hands under Eddie’s ass and lifted him, throwing him over his shoulder before carrying him back into the house. “No one gets to see you like this but me.”

Buck carried him to the bedroom and threw him down on the bed before climbing on top of him after taking off his t-shirt and sweatpants. Eddie stared at his naked body and licked his lips. Buck captured Eddie’s lips in a kiss as his hand slipped into Eddie’s shorts, making Eddie gasp. “What about the bet?” He asked.

“Screw the bet,” Buck replied and kissed him again.

And if Albert had called him the previous night to tell him he had given into his desires and picked up a woman at the bar and taken her home, then Eddie didn’t need to know that. He just needed to know that he had successfully made Buck lose his bet.

#buddie #evan buckley #eddie diaz #albert han #hen wilson #chimney han #bobby nash #ravi panikkar #911 abc #911 fox #fanfiction #fanfic #aashnas drabble #this is pure crack

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pickupthephoneboy · 11 days

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"There are like three Ikuo's running around. My Ikuo, sad Ikuo, and Captain Ikuo. If I see another Ikuo come out of nowhere I swear I will start a Ikuo harem."

"Requirements in joining the Ikuo harem:

1. You got to be Ikuo. If you're not Ikuo I ain't interested.

2. I will play favorites so don't get mad at me.

3. Must be a male Ikuo. Though if you're a feminine looking Ikuo I will allow.

4. Every Ikuo will get a nickname so I can keep track of who is who."

#bsd #bsd oc #bungou stray dogs #bungou stray dogs oc #captain ross #THIS IS PURE CRACK

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andiebomb · 1 month

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HEAR ME OUT

qsmp deathduo ratatouille AU…

Ratoier as Remy

Missa as Linguini

Philza as Colette

#qsmp #qsmp lore #qsmp philza #qsmp missa #death duo #qsmp roier #ratoier #this is pure crack

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tinytinyturttlesoup · 3 months

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#rise leo #rottmnt #teenage mutant ninja turtles #rise donnie #rise mikey #rise raph #tmnt fanart #genshin impact #xiangling #genshin au #xiangling genshin impact #this is pure crack #But omg this interaction would be so cute #I’m following where the worms take me at this point

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witchofthesouls · 7 months

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does a line of Dark Energon with crack mixed in

In the hypothetical AU where Primus told Prima to be nice to all his siblings before going to binge watch all the good Transformers cartoons dormant, the power of the Butterfly Effect triggers a chain of events that lead to Prima & the OG Predaking to become Conjux Endura.

Cue Nexus laughing his afts off, Liege Maximo Error 404ing, & Vector drinking himself into a coma at what will become Maccadam's with how weird things are going to be in the future.

(Tone: Crack treated Semi-Seriously. Enemies to Lovers. Cultural Differences. Fix-it-of-sorts. Minor Fourth Wall Breaking (thanks, Thirteen))

Yo, this is wild.

Look, I would find it hilarious by sheer random chance... Prima went to woo Predaking just to prove a point to Megatronus that he has a life as well. That Prima can absolutely "be in the moment." And could totally function without him. No, he can't. He needs someone.

Liege Maximo is that one that's laughing himself sick because of the epic stories this would inspire... all because Prima is too jealous of Megatronus spending time away from him and his vision for the future. Yes, he has his Guiding Hand, but he wants his shadow-twin dammit.

And if Prima can't have Megatronus to himself, then he'll take the talking dragon that flies through the massive lightning storms.

Prima has siblings questioning his wooing skills, his taste in partners, if this is even an attempt of romance or another way to bring the Wild lands to heel, or if he's breaking under his own perfectionist tendencies.

They're making bets on whether or not they do fuck, how they do it, and if Prima has it in him to "lower his inhibitions" because he's such a stick-in-the-mud.

#zoomerinaboomercostume #transformers #transformers prime #tfp #prima #predaking #megatronus prime #liege maximo #fic ideas #this is pure crack #maccadam #my thoughts #liege would be dying over the myths this would inspire #gods and goddesses #siblings be siblings okay even godly ones #ask

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starlessmistake · 1 year

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Tinkerlina and Captain Darkling

#darklina #alina starkov #aleksander morozova #the darkling #alina x the darkling #my edit #this is pure crack #i'm so sorry

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shadoedseptmbr · 3 months

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five-ish lines for Friday

Chakwas hummed and Aedan glanced over at her. "Actually, Commander, I've been a part of several medical conference committees that have considered issuing a similar report and recommendation." "What, to the turian approach?" She nodded, "Yes. While officers do tend to come from more stable backgrounds, enlisted are often drawn in to escape their situations. Physical contact, if positive and consent oriented, is frequently an excellent frontline remedy to stress, especially for those from adverse childhood experiences. Given our origins, mammallian litters and all, prolonged cuddles are better for increasing resilience, but soldiers will be soldiers."

#sept writes #this is pure crack #doc chakwas #prescribing cuddles for stress relief

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trhor · 11 months

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The One Where Theo and Macsen Get Arrested

After seeing @citylighten's post [x], I had to do it because this is the best way to describe the difference between Theo and Macsen. This is the embodiment of their personalities. So please enjoy this noncanon tomfoolery thanks to @sojutrait for the glorious pose [x].

#trhoredit #trhor edit #non canon compliant #trhor extras #ts4 edit #sims 4 edit #royal sims #for the lols #she's Theodora #and he's just Macsen #theo rutherford kerr #macsen rutherford kerr #non canon tomfoolery #this is pure crack #have a nice day

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slutforsilverfoxes · 10 months

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Live thoughts as I watch Hawaii Five-0 ep 9x4- enjoy 👀

Christ this man looks GOOD

The vest? The hat? The scruff? Lord have mercy

And the wedding band makes him look even sexier

Something about Steve saying “that’s my granddaddy” is so cute but so hot? Idk man I’m unwell

I deadass read “Apana” as my name and got excited

I wanna be that toothpick 🫦

Danny’s transatlantic accent is killing me (and unforch not in a good way 💀)

The music? Incredible. Love the vibe.

Tani as a lounge singer is not something I knew I needed

And Adam with the mustache PLS 😭

Smoking is icky and my asthmatic ass would die but everything he does is hot so fml (fuck my lungs) I guess

I know this mf did not just raw dog that champagne like an animal

Nooo old timey Tani :(

LOU omg my fave look at you in your lil get up

I seriously cannot handle Danny’s (or Milton’s ig) voice 🫠

Chew on that toothpick one more time you sexy son of a bitch, see what happens

The sleeves rolled up above his forearms? OOF

I wanna tug those suspenders off and- nvm

Jerry with the gun okay buddy!!

Okay so clearly Steve gets his reckless gene from his granddaddy

This whole scene of them entering the house has me cracking tf up

Yes SIR Detective McGarrett you threaten that man

The way his tongue peeks out to mess with the toothpick I’m weak

“Stay.” YES SIR

Oh sheet it do be December 7th 😔

What I would give to wake up to that sleepy face

Thank god Danny’s regular voice is back 🥲

“Why, with the face” I love them sm wtf

I love when they type random things on their little techy board and we all pretend they’re actually doing something

“No pool.” “No pool.” No pool! My man is so smart

No way you found this old ass car there homie

He’s in a suit AGAIN do they want me to DIE?

Yeahh babyyy the suit jacket is off 🥵

Why can’t u run a restaurant and be a cop Steven don’t be an idiot

Look how sad you’ve made your bestie

Oh now we’re both quitting? Lame.

That little growled “yes” I’m feral

In conclusion: 1940s Steve McGarrett = hot. Present day Steve McGarrett = also hot.

Thank you all for joining me on this journey 🫡 This is my fourth (?) watch of the show but my first time braving seasons 8-10 so we’ll see how many more ficlets write themselves

#hawaii five 0 #steve mcgarrett #my thougts #i love this man so much #this is purely self indulgent #this is pure crack #pls enjoy

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creativepromptsforwriting · 2 years

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Vacuum-cleaner (yes the hyphen makes it one word 👀)

I'm German and we just put all the words together into one really long word, so I accept a lot as just one word. 😅 also interesting choice. Are you excited to write cool stories about cleaning?

Vacuum-cleaner

If their neighbor decides to vacuum the entire apartment again this Sunday at 7 am, then they will definitely go over there and have a word with them.

"Wait... did you say you tried to put out the fire by vacuuming it?!"

The modern witch doesn't fly on a broom anymore. The real bougie ones have a dyson.

It was the third time today that they have stubbed their toe on their vacuum cleaner, so they decided it was probably time to clean up.

"So how exactly did your entire mouth get stuck in the pipe of a vacuum cleaner? Did you try to kiss it? Oh you did?"

One Word Prompt Lists

#this is pure crack #vacuum cleaner #i now write vacuum cleaner prompts and stuff about goats #anon #one word prompts #one word prompt list #writeblr #writers on tumblr #prompt list

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nighthaunting · 1 year

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So a while ago I decided that 'Cuthbert' was actually only Beckett's middle name (and mother's maiden name via the 'mother's maiden name' naming convention)

Establishing that this man was theoretically born sometime between 1630 (where I put his birthday for a late 1600s embrace) and 1670 (if he was exactly thirty and embraced exactly in 1700), I decided that Beckett shared a given name with fellow English historian, diarist, and library enthusiast Narcissus Luttrell!

Narcissus Cuthbert Beckett! Which is fun not only because it means the 'Cuthbert' is definitely being used as bait to distract from 'Narcissus', but it also means Beckett's parents were trendsetters, with middle names only just starting to come into fashion in England!

#this is pure crack #but also s2g every time i mention beckett Know that i am imagining his first name is narcissus #cuthbert beckett #beckett #back on my beckett bullshit #vtm #vampire the masquerade

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science-lings · 1 year

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I forget if I sent this already or not, genuine 50/50, but "poggers" for the ask game?

"That's not very poggers of you," Wind pouted after Time took the DS from his, admittedly very tired, hands.

"You don't even know what pogs are, you know, I could teach you the way of the true pogchamp if it'll get you off of that cursed device," the old man suggested after a brief moment of confusion at his teenager's modern lingo.

"No thank you, I'd rather be in bed..." The kid paled and disappeared from the room, his old man opening his son's 'cursed device' and continuing his game of Majora's Mask now that his little sailor had been scared away.

#this is pure crack #i like it #boomer time boomer time #linked universe #ask andromeda #ask game #lu time #lu wind #lu modern au #three sentence fic #three sentence prompt #btw I'm time in this scenario idk what poggers is

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sgtbradfords · 2 years

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Chenford + I can't be your aide anymore Tim

A soft and melodic laughter reached her ears as she quietly voiced the statement of truth. Lucy blinked slowly, her brow furrowed in anguish as she looked towards the man who sat on the doctor's chair beside her. She could just make out the features above his nose from behind the mask he wore. The corners of his eyes were crinkled in what she knew to be amusement yet the skin below them were darkened, sunken, showing his exhaustion.

Lucy attempted to swallow, yet found her mouth to be dry. She had thoughts, questions, but they were muddled and hard to put together, especially with a mouth that felt as though it had been lined with cotton.

"I know." He chuckled and she glared. What the hell was so funny? Did he not hear what she had said? "You can't be my aide anymore."

Ok, there was something she was missing. Rapidly, she opened and closed her eyes. Maybe if she blinked fast enough, she would be able to remember what it was.

"Lucy, what the hell are you doing?"

"I'm thinking." So not only was her mouth dry, but the words falling past her lips, sounded rather subdued.

Tim snorted beside her head, rolling his eyes. When had he moved so close? He was close enough that she could make out the color of his eyes and the wrinkles beside them.

"You look like you're having a seizure."

A retort was on the tip of her tongue, but a third voice inturupted the conversation as light footsteps could be heard entering the room.

"Alright Mrs. Bradford, your vitals are good and you seem to not having any reaction to the medications so it looks like you are good to go home."

Lucy giggled, the poor nurse thought her and Tim were married. It was an honest mistake, one that had strangely happened on more than one occasion but Lucy didn't want to think too much into it.

"We're not married, Tim's my partner at work."

The nurse raised a brow as her gaze bounced between Tim and where Lucy laid as she raised the bed. "Right..."

"Is this-"

"A side effect of the anesthesia?" The nurse completed Tim's question and Lucy pouted. Was what a side effect of the anesthesia? "Yes, but it will begin to wear off soon. Now, we've been over care instructions, but should either of you have any questions, please call the number at the top of this paper or if it's emergent, 9-1-1."

Lucy giggled as the other two occupants of the room turned their heads. Suddenly she felt exposed as she shifted her body in the chair. "But Tim," She released a chortle once more. "We are 9-1-1."

A long and ragged sigh met her ears as Tim placed a firm grasp on her arm, pulling her upward and into unsteady feet. "Can I please just leave her here?"

Like the flip of a switch, tears sprang to her eyes. He was going to leave her? But why? What had she done wrong?

"You're leaving me?"

They paused as the doors in front of her opened automatically. "No sweetheart, I'm not leaving you."

"Please don't leave me."

He quietly chuckled with every word. "I will never leave you Lucy."

Lucy could hear the sincerity behind his words. He had to be telling the truth she mentally decided as they approached the running truck that was parked at the curb. "Of course I am. Now, can we go home?"

She listened as Tim sighed once more, pulling open the door before helping her clamor into the truck. The seat was warm from the sunshine though cool air filtered through the vents, a familiar song played through the speakers. Slowly, Lucy turned her head to her right, watching as Tim pulled the seatbelt across her chest before locking it into place.

Lucy hummed along to the song on the radio as she watched Tim as he rounded the truck to open his own door.

"You smell good."

"What?"

"You smell good."

Tim glanced out of the corner of his eye as he worked on steering the truck through the parking lot. "I smile food?"

Lucy's head hit the headrest as she released a groan in defeat with the close of her eyes. She could not wait until she could remove the gauze from inside her mouth, which hopefully would be soon. Opening her eyes once more, she turned her head.

"You're an idiot." She articulated the three words, slowing her speech down as she spoke, hoping that the confession was intelligible.

"I love you too Lucy."

Tim reached over the center seat, grabbing her left hand. Lucy thought it was strange as she let him interlace their fingers, and she had questions as to why she felt as though something was missing from the hand he was holding. But instead she looked out the window towards the traffic that passed by and she doesn't think she has ever been more content in her life.

#chenford fanfiction #chenford fanfic #fanfic #chenford #thanks for the ask!#asks #anon #this is pure crack #i am not sorry #inspired by a reddit post

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