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#they really are consuming my life and i'm not complaining
pinkthrone445 · 15 days
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-Let it burn to the ground-
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Pairing:Melissa Schemmenti x Reader
Gender:love, hurt, confort, funny
Warnings:Mention about past trauma, fires, future smut(?)
Summary:Melissa lets the fire of love consume her when she meets the new chief of the fire station.
Melissa Schemmenti, a woman who has had many things in life, including different experiences in love, had her first love in college, was married, was cheated on, divorced, was in a relationship again, broke up since they didn't have the same goals, and now she was having an affair with the fire captain... It was casual, with no feelings, just sex. She just wanted him for that, she even wanted to avoid talking about personal things and get him out of her house as soon as possible, but when he started staying overnight and eating breakfast with her and Jacob, the fire captain started to get the wrong idea.
Melissa didn't want a relationship with him, it was just casual, but he wanted to share more and more things about his life even though she didn't want to hear it.
One night, while they were together, the redhead wanted to undress him as quickly as possible before he started talking, she had even thought about buying a gag for him. But while she tried to undo his pants, he kept letting out sighs, so she stopped to ask what was wrong, even if she didn't really cared, she wanted the sings to stop, because she knew they wouldn't have sex if he didn't talked about what was bothering him first.
-"Okay, talk, what is going on with you? Why are you complaining so much?" - The redhead asked, crossing her arms and sitting on the bed looking at him
-"I'm tired of my work" - he confessed and the redhead rolled her eyes getting up of bed again
-"Okey, now that you got that out of your chest, can we have sex?"-The woman asked, raising an eyebrow, and he looked at her with a frown
-"I didn't even started talking about it, aren't you going to ask why I'm tired of my job when I used to love it?" - he asked a little offended by her lack of interest
-"Yeah yeah, go ahead, tell me please, I'm dying to know, why you are mad at your job" - The redhead said sarcastically, putting on her dressing gown and sitting up on the bed again
-"I got a new fire chief for the district, an asshole chief that is babysitting my station because the district got a few complains about us... I don't like it when there's someone watching my every step and checking what I'm doing wrong... On top of that the chief has a shitty humor, I think they need someone to have sex with, although I don't think anyone wants to touch them even with a 3-meter pole..."-Melissa listened to him complain for a long time, her desire to have sex had disappeared and now she was bored and upset, she didn't want a relationship, it was something casual, and what was happening was not casual at all-"They thinks that because has a badge of honor and a higher title they can command us however they wants, a couple of scars don't make others respect you, it's so annoying, that's why no one has touched them for years probably"-This time he rolled his eyes and Mel sighed looking at him
-"Do you feel better now that you've got that off your chest?" - The redhead asked and he nodded-"Good, you can go home now" - She said curtly and he looked at her confused
-"What? Why?" - he asked
-"Tomorrow I have to be at school early..."-Mel replied
-"Since when is that a problem? I can stay overnight..."-He offered, but she refused, getting out of bed, lifting the clothes that were on the floor and giving them to him
-"It's a problem since we said this would be a casual thing and you're making yourself very comfortable in my house, staying in my bed to sleep, leaving your toothbrush, eating Jacob's cereal, wanting to have deep talks... That wasn't our deal, I need you to go"-Melissa practically pushed him out of the room, insisting until she managed to get him to leave.
For a few days they didn't even talk by text, until one afternoon after school he was outside the doors waiting. The redhead approached confused and annoyed
-"What are you doing here? I don't want to see you yet..." - She whispered in an annoyed tone and he rolled his eyes
-"Get off your horse, princess. I'm not here for you, my stupid boss send me to get their son..."-He replied in an annoyed tone pointing at one kid that was waiting by the door with Barbara. Mel narrowed her eyes looking at the little guy, he was definitely a new kid at school since she hadn't seen him before.
When Barbra gave the signal that they could get out, the little boy ran to the fireman and stood next to him looking at him
-"Hi. My mom told me that you would come for me because she had to stay at the station cleaning..."-Commented the little boy. Actually, his mother had meant that she had to stay at the station cleaning the mess that Captain Robinson had made, but she couldn't tell that to the kid.
Mel frowned listening to the little guy
-"You didn't told me your new boss was a woman" - she whispered to the firefighter
-"Yeah, 'Cause if I'd told you she was a woman when I was complaining, you would've thought I didn't like her just because she was a woman and no because she is an actually asshole that has me running errands instead of giving me actual job" - He muttered, looking at the redhead annoyed. The little boy frowned
-"You're going to have to put money in the jar... You said something bad" - The boy said, adjusting his backpack annoyed.
-"What jar?" - Mel asked and the boy turned his attention to her
-"His mother put a jar in the station for us to put money in when we are aggressive or bad-mouthing co-workers, she said it would help make us a team..."-The firefighter commented annoyed and the redhead laughed at him
-"If it doesn't work like she wanted, at least she'll make extra quick money with you and your big mouth" - Melissa commented, laughing and patting the man's back, which rolled his eyes
-"Come on boy, your mother is waiting for you and I don't want her to take points away from me for being late again" - He muttered through his breath in annoyance and the little guy started following him
-"Goodbye Miss Schemmenti" - The little boy waved his hand before leaving
-"Goodbye little one, say hi to your mother, tell her that I like her very much even though I don't know her" - The redhead shouted before going back to the entrance of the school.
A couple of weeks passed and it was the day when Barbara's class would present who were the heroes for each children. Since Mel's class was in gym and she was free, she decided to stop by her work wife's class to listen to the kids.
Several children introduced their "heroes," some talked about their favorite heroe from a movie o cartoon, others about a soccer player, others about their pets, and some about their parents, who some of them were present.
Last of all, Barbara called the boy Melissa had met a few weeks ago
-"Cris... Come here please, it's your turn" - Barbara called the little boy to the front, who stood up carrying a fireman's helmet that was almost as big as his body, The little boy put his helmet on Barbara's desk playing with his little hands
-"My mom was supposed to come..."-He whispered in a shy tone
-"Hi, excuse me" - Mel felt a sexy but soft voice behind her and as she turned she saw a woman with a beautiful smile, wearing a blue T-shirt and firefighter pants with red suspenders. You passed by her side but the redhead stood in the place staring at you dumbfounded, lost enough to really listen to what you had asked her. Immediately Melissa thought you were the most beautiful and perfect woman she had ever seen, she had to admit that she had a weakness for women in uniform, but you were something else. Dumbfounded, she watched as you approached the little boy and knelt beside him hugging him
-"I'm here my baby" - You whispered and the boy hugged you with a lot of emotion
-"You came!"-The little guy hung on to you like a little koala and you stand up with him in your arms
-"I promise I would... And I never break a promise..."-You whispered and kissed his forehead making him smile-"Now I think you've got a presentation to give little gentleman" - You whispered and he nodded letting you lower him to the ground to present, you knelt next to him again to be at his level. Your son started talking excitedly mentioning the reasons why you were his hero, among them he mentioned your job as a firefighter chief and supervisor, your job as mom and you knowledge about medicine. Then he showed his classmates the helmet and they made you do push-ups with some kids on your back to show your strength.
Your son was very excited, being in a new school and feeling included was something that made him happy, and thanks to you being there it was possible. And even though you were tired of exercising, you were more than happy and was worth the effort to see him happy.
The kids took turns climbing on you excitedly, while others tried on your helmet and some parents took pictures. While you were only focusing your eyes on your son, the redhead was focusing on you, almost literally salivating for you. The way you smiled made it seem like you weren't making an effort, even though the sweat that collected on your forehead gave you away. Melissa had her eyes fixed on the way your arm muscles twitched and your bright smile shined. Her mouth had literally filled with saliva about to drool for you, but may the earth swallow her if she let others see her like that for you or anyone.
The redhead swallowed and cleared her throat when the kids decided they had enough and let you get up. Barbara congratulated your son on his presentation and let the class leave.
Your little one ran to get his backpack and came back to you jumping up and down, you picked him up smiling and placed your helmet on his head, walking to the exit, which was blocked by the same redhead from before
-"Excuse me..."-You whispered sweetly, but she didn't move, just like when you arrived
-"Miss Schementti!!" - Your son screamed, snapping the redhead out of her trance
-"Oh! I'm so sorry..."-she whispered, looking at you
-"It's okay, I'm sorry for my son, he is very exited that I came to school, that's hard for him to contain his emotion..."-You whispered and your son laughed mischievously but very cute
-"I get it... I would get very exited too if I see you come... I mean if I see you visit me at school" - The redhead blushed as she heard her own words-"I'm sorry, firefighters get me exited too..."-she whispered and you laughed tenderly at how cute she looked blushing
-"That's sweet..."-You whispered looking at her
-"I'm Melissa by the way... I teach third grade... I hope to have your children one day" - The redhead blushed again at how bad that sounded and you couldn't help but laugh again
-"You sure do... I'm (Y/N), it's a pleasure..."-You replied by reaching out your hand to shake hers, when you did the redhead was surprised with how soft your hands were despite the strength you had-"I have to go home to bath this little prince, but I hope to see you again sometime Miss Schementti" - You whispered close to her ear making her shiver before you went down the hall with your son in your arms, while Mel followed you down the hall, she realized that her favorite sound in the world was hearing her name coming out of your mouth.
The days began to pass and you couldn't stop spinning in the redhead's head, either on the nights she was at home she thought about how your muscles tensed under your t-shirt, or in broad daylight she remembered your sweet voice and beautiful smile. She needed to see you again and her head couldn't stop thinking of a plan to get it done.
As fate would have it, the perfect opportunity presented itself when Janine mentioned that they would do a fire drill in conjunction with the firefighters since the last time there was an accident, they were not well organized. Melissa was sure that you would be in that drill since your son was going to that school.
On the day of the drill Mel decided to spend more time than usual on her appearance, she spent more time putting together her curls and styling her hair, applied more makeup and perfume than usual, chose her best outfit and put on her best bra, the one that most settled her breasts and made them look well lifted. As she left the house, Jacob couldn't help but notice the change and comment on it
-"Wow, you look amazing... What is going on? Does it have anything to do with the fire captain that used to come home?" - He asked curiously, but Melissa laughed in denial
-"I don't know what you're talking about, I'm not interested in him anymore..."-she responded by starting the car
-"Then it's for someone else..." - The young man was quickly able to draw the correct deduction since he had spent a lot of time with the redhead lately and had gotten to know her well-"I'm sure is a firefighter, you've always liked people in uniform and it's no coincidence that today you dressed up better on the day of the drill... Am I going on the right path?"-He inquired but she didn't say anything, concentrating on driving-"Come on you know I'm an excellent wingman, if you tell me I can help you..."-He commented in a knowing tone, the redhead just gave him a quick glance trying not to show her true interest. The truth is that she could do it alone, but she could use help to find out if you had a partner or if the father of your child was still around.
-"That's fine, but if you do anything to embarrass me, remember that you live in my house and that I could easily get you into a fatal" accident", you understand?"-she whispered in a threatening tone, and his housemate nodded excitedly, paying no attention to the threat
-"Tell me who it is and what can I do to help" - He smiled and clapped his hands with a grin from ear to ear
-"It's the fire chief and supervisor, the parent on Barbara's class... I need to know if they are single, that's all..."-She whispered a little embarrassedly with her eyes fixed on the road
-"But the fire chief is a wom... I knew you were bi! My gaydar is never wrong" - He whispered more to himself than to the redhead-"Consider it done" - It was the last thing they talked about in the car before they got to school.
Melissa spent most of her class hours training her students for the drill, the teachers weren't supposed to tell the students, but the redhead wanted to do everything right to see if you noticed her and praise her even a little.
When the redhead heard the sirens outside the school, her heart jumped with excitement and joy, she ran excitedly to the windows just to see you get out of the truck with all your uniform on, your gazes met momentarily when you were looking for the window of your son's classroom, the redhead smiled and you smiled back waving at her from a distance before entering the school.
Seconds later, Jacob appeared at the door of Melissa's classroom, breathing heavily from running, trying to keep his composure, he approached the redhead who was waiting for him excitedly
-"My" friend" from the fire station told me that she was married, but her husband passed away a couple of years ago and that no one has seen her with anyone or found out that she is in a relationship... My work here is done, I need to get back to my class before the drill starts"-He commented as fast as he could before running off again
-"Thank you!" - The redhead screamed excitedly and decided to put perfume back on and check her appearance on her mirror.
When everything was ready, the drill began and with it the control of the students and the entire building. Every time you passed by Melissa's side, her perfume blocked your senses and left your judgment clouded for a few seconds until you recomposed your posture, you loved perfumes like that. One of your weaknesses was when someone smelled good.
Surprisingly, the redhead's classroom was the most organized and several times you used it as an example of how to behave in a real fire. After all the control of the facilities and the drill was over, you greeted your son before he went back to school and decided to visit the redhead for her good preparation and behavior.
When you got to her classroom, she was sitting at her desk checking some assignments and wearing her glasses while her kids where focusing doing homework. Softly you knocked on the door getting her attention. Mel got up carefully and walked to the door smiling
-"Hi chief" - She whispered in a deducible tone and a tender smile-"Can I help with something?" - Asked
-"Hi miss Schementti... No, I just wanted to come and congratulate you personally on how well you and your class behaved in the drill..."-You whispered holding your helmet in your hands, taking a big but sneaky breath to feel her perfume, which the redhead noticed and couldn't help but smile
-"Thank you... I take the safety of my students very seriously... Thanks for noticing" - She whispered a little nervously about your presence and leaned into the doorframe looking at you
-"I'm glad to hear that... This is for you" - You handed her a pin that said "you're the only smoking hot thing I'll let it be out of control", laughing a little-"They where from the pride parade that we did last month, sorry. But I wanted to give you something for your good preparation... And this is for your students" - You handed her stickers of firefighters smiling a little embarrassed as she watched the pin smiling-"Since I've done everything I needed to do, I'll go drive the truck now... I hope to see you again sometime... Have a nice afternoon Schementti..."-You muttered making a couple of excessive gestures with your hands because of your nerves for the silly pin
-"Thanks for the pin and the visit... Do you want to see each other again outside of school soon? Maybe to grab a coffee or a bite to eat?..."-The redhead asked confidently, taking you by surprise
-"Oh yes... Sure, I'd like to go for something to eat...maybe tomorrow? It's my day off..."-You replied smiling and she nodded excitedly
-"I'll ask Janine for your number and I'll call you to work out the details... See you tomorrow chief" - Melissa commented, and when you went to the truck, she did a little dance of victory for getting a chance to go out with you.
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purplekiwis · 8 months
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𝑲𝒊𝒔𝒔𝒂𝒃𝒍𝒆
Summary: While they're on opposite ends of the social spectrum, Y/N and Harry have been the closest of friends for years. But could it be that an all-night working session for a science project helps them break out of the friendzone?
Genre: Friends to Lovers | Nerd!Harry x Badgirl!Y/N
Warnings: SMUT | Self-Deprication | This is coming-of-age story. There's no mention of their age but both characters are in their last year of high school (just a heads up in case someone doesn't want to read because of that)
Wordcount: 10k
A/N: ok y'all, so i have made a mistake.
i was like 99% sure there was a request in my inbox asking for a blurb where harry was nerdy? i found it interesting so i started working on it... only to realize halfway into things that that was not in fact what was written in the request 😅
i figured i might as well post it anyways since i wrote it but yeah... i'm sorry, anon! i (now) know you wanted subby!harry, but all i have to give you is nerd!harry (don't worry, i made him a lil subby just for you 🤫)
also, before y'all flood my inbox with asks about the non finished fics (rightfully so) i hear you and i'm very, very sorry for the lack of updates. i had to take a break because i kept feeling like the texts i could come up with weren't good enough for the stories i wanted to tell. i still partly feel that way, but i'm hoping the lack of real harry content will inspire me to write more in the near future. thank you for reading my dumb little stories, i love you 💖
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Harry was never too fond of grocery shopping.
He really didn’t like the whole “put things inside the cart, remove things from the cart at the cashier, bag them, put them back into the cart, get them in the car, take them out of the car, bring them inside and put them away” process.
It was extremely inconvenient to him.
It was also very time-consuming, though Harry believed this particular belief of his was directly influenced by having to grocery shop with his grandparents every other day.
Naturally, they were slower than he was, so he'd just drag his feet behind them, push the cart and wait for them to ask him to grab something from the shelves that their aging pains no longer allowed them to reach.
That part was fine, what bore him the most was how easily they got sidetracked by trinkets that weren’t on the shopping list. Oh! And how they always managed to locate a random old couple they knew from God knows where who engaged them in talks that appeared to stretch for hours.
Harry would try and make up reasons not to go with them sometimes, but he always felt a little guilty about it afterwards. After all, it was a very small favor for him to help his grandparents with their groceries, considering they had been the ones to provide him with a loving home after his parents failed to do so.
People always seemed to feel sorry for him when they found out he'd grown up without his “real parents” around, but he'd never had reasons to complain, really. Unlike his parents, Joe and Martha had always treated him nicely and made him feel genuinely loved.
They were a little overprotective at times, but like Y/N always said, that was probably because they were retired and watched too much TV.
Speaking of Y/N, Harry didn't hate grocery shopping with her so much. He even kind of enjoyed it as long as the space wasn't too crowded. That day it wasn’t, which he was extremely thankful for because it reduced the chances of them bumping into any familiar faces who might ask about his grandparents, or if the pretty girl he was with was his girlfriend.
That’s another thing he detested about running into people his grandparents were friends with - they loved to pester him with indiscreet questions about his love life that made him go red-faced. It was even worse when he happened to be with Y/N during those times; fortunately, she was always a bit clueless about it. Harry guessed that the reason for that was that she was so comfortable with their friendship that she wasn't even aware of what was going on… even if she thought it a little odd that he kept introducing her as his neighbor even though they weren't neighbors anymore.
Despite the fact that they no longer lived next door to each other, Y/N was still a frequent visitor at Harry’s house. Ever since his family relocated to a different area of the city, it had become custom for her to spend the night whenever the two had group projects to complete.
Their journey was always the same. As soon as they got off the bus from school, they would head to the supermarket to stock up on frozen pizzas and late-night goodies to help them through the long hours they’d be spending working on their computers.
They'd just grabbed their pizzas, as well as another two for his grandparents since pizza happened to be one of the few fast foods that they tolerated, and were now wandering around the drinks aisle looking at the options.
“Do you think your grandma would notice if we hid one of these in your backpack?” Asked the ex-neighbor, Y/N. The smile on her face, coupled with her mischievous gaze got him figuring she was up to no good… even before he noticed the bottle of whatever alcoholic beverage she was holding.
The idea startled him a little more than he'd like to admit. “Don’t start! And put it back before anyone sees you.”
The way his body jumped made Y/N laugh as she set the bottle back on its shelf. “Relax, okay? I was only messing with you... I knew you'd be too chicken to do it. But just so you know, they don't even ask for an ID most times.”
He replied to her with a headshake. “You're not as cool as you think just because you get drunk with your other friends every once in a while.” She didn’t seem too pleased by his remark, but Harry figured that by now she ought to know he didn't mean most of what he said when he was stressed. “You can get an iced tea… or a pepsi… or even that weird-flavored soda you like.”
“Fine.”
Harry noticed that even after he allowed her to pick the drink they’d be having later, Y/N still didn't seem particularly happy with him. She trailed behind him in silence while he pushed the cart around and didn't even appear to care when they walked past the shelf where her favorite snack was.
“Did you know that statistically, people who start drinking in their teens have a 5 times higher likelihood of becoming alcoholics than those who only start later?” Harry knew it probably wasn't the best conversation topic to get her to talk to him, but it was the only thing that came to mind in the moment.
“Did you know that stating facts like that makes you look 1000 times more of a nerd than you already are?”
Harry snorted at her retort. “You didn't seem to mind me being a nerd when you asked me to work on the review paper with you.”
“I do every school project with you, why should this be any different?”
He smirked at that. It was true. He and Y/N had attended every academic year together since they first met in elementary school, and they had managed to enroll in almost all of the same classes each time. They were currently in their senior year of high school, and their friendship was still pretty solid despite their different personalities and social interests.
Y/N was in the midst of a rebellious phase. In the beginning it all had been quite harmless, with her obsession with dyeing the ends of her hair crazy colors and pairing fishnets with knee socks. That somehow led her into starting to hang out with people Harry considered to be a little unnerving.
He wasn't sure what exactly made him nervous about them... Maybe it was because he was a little resentful over having to “compete” for Y/N's attention and feared he would one day completely lose her to them, given that they were undoubtedly the cooler part of the equation. Perhaps part of it was also because those people reminded him of the kind who used to bully him for being a dork when he was younger. Thankfully, he wasn't being bullied as much anymore, but he still didn't have many friends.
He also barely interacted with girls, as one might expect. There were times he had crushes, but he was always afraid to talk to them, so things never really progressed anywhere. Thus, Y/N was really Harry's only female friend.
He confesses sometimes he was surprised she still wanted to hang out with him as much as she did. When she became popular, Harry naturally assumed she would ditch him for social status reasons, but that never happened, which was a big relief to him since he really liked having her around.
They were both geeky, so they watched a lot of sci-fi movies and played video games together... but when it came to other things, they were a little different. Y/N had a much better sense of style, was much more social, and enjoyed doing dumb things like smoking weed and getting drunk behind her parents’ backs.
Harry had never really understood the appeal of it. In fact, his lack of interest in participating in grown-up stuff sometimes worried him a bit, but again... it wasn’t like he wasn’t curious.
There were a few times when he thought it would be cool if he could hang out with Y/N and her friends, go out drinking, dance, and maybe, just maybe, if he was very very lucky, even get to kiss someone on the mouth.
But then he always ended up reasoning that people like him weren't welcome at parties and that if he ever dared to step foot into one he'd probably end up being the butt of everyone’s jokes.
Even knowing so, he couldn't help fantasizing about it… especially the last part. Yes, Harry definitely thought about intimacy a lot more than he'd ever be willing to admit… and he also pondered a lot about how being practically invisible to girls sucked… and about how much he wished one would give him a chance.
He was aware of his issues, however. He knew he wasn’t exactly the hottest guy around. His haircut and clothing were out of style, mostly because he lacked the confidence to mess with his looks and follow the trends the way other people did. He’d buy new t-shirts sometimes; the only thing was that they almost always had videogame-related designs which obviously didn't do his style much good.
But it wasn’t all bad. Harry knew he had nice eyes… he just couldn't get the girls to come close enough to notice them. He figured the way he mostly stared at the floor when he walked, along with the thick glasses he had been wearing since his childhood had also taken part in preventing people from noticing how exquisite his peepers were.
He thought Y/N had nice peepers as well, and he liked the way she accentuated them with make-up… even when her eyeliner turned out a little uneven or got smudgy because she forgot she had it on and rubbed her eyes with her fingers.
She'd been doing that a lot in the last hour they'd been working on their paper, which was making Harry feel a little bad.
It had been a good while since they had returned from the supermarket. The issue was that when they arrived at his house, they found Harry's grandparents working in the backyard. And while Harry had never been a fan of getting his hands dirty in the garden, Y/N thought it would be nice to offer to help, so they ended up spending a good chunk of their afternoon pulling weeds and pruning flower bushes.
And then, since it was already close to dinner time when they finished, they decided it would be best to begin working on the paper after eating and showering the gardening sweat off their bodies. That plan was shelved, however, because Harry really wanted to play Mortal Kombat since it was multiplayer, and he rarely had anyone to play it with. So they wound up wasting an additional hour on that.
Normally, by that time in the evening Y/N would already be working on her part, but as they'd started late, she wasn't. Also, being the control freak he was, Harry always wanted to be the one in charge of the research portion of any papers they worked on. Leaving the final task of writing and flourishing to Y/N.
So the poor girl had been sitting next to him in bed for hours, watching him go through articles on his laptop.
Harry could tell by the increased frequency of her yawns that her battery was running low, so he wasn't the least bit surprised when he heard her hesitantly ask, “Are you planning on staying up working much longer? Aren’t you getting tired?”
“Um… not really. I came across this really interesting essay on our subject and want to make sure we gather all of their data.” He was so preoccupied with copying and pasting that he didn't even look away from the screen as he replied to the question. “It's a shame we don’t have any hot springs nearby... wouldn't it be cool if we could actually collect samples of these microbes to study them in the lab?”
“Are you for real?” She looked at him like he was crazy as she let her back slide halfway down the headboard. “You’re telling me that you really find water microbes that intriguing?”
“Not all of them, it’s just that I’d never considered the possibility that there could be species growing and thriving in actual boiling water… since, you know, that’s what’s supposed to kill them.”
“I didn’t find it so surprising, which is making me wonder if it could be that I’m smarter than you...”
“Not a chance.” Due to the silence that followed his teasing, Harry realized that Y/N was nearing sleep but was resisting in order to maintain her supportive role. “Should I go get the air mattress to make your bed?”
“I can't sleep. I haven't done my part yet.”
“It's fine; we still have the entire day tomorrow to finish.”
“Don't bother with me if you’re focused on the paper. I just need rest my eyes a bit, but I won’t fall asleep.” She promised, but Harry knew better than to believe her. “You don't mind if I cover up with your sheets, right? Your room’s a bit chilly.”
“No, not at all.” He didn't mind it, in fact, he even found it a little exciting. Not in a pervy way, but it felt good to know that a pretty girl would be laying in his bed and would most likely leave a bit of her girly scent on it. Harry tried not to dwell on those kinds of thoughts over Y/N too much, but of course he thought she was pretty. He wasn’t that blind.
He hadn't always felt that way. For a long while Harry just thought of her as his best friend, but she'd grown into her curves in the last couple of years and he would be lying if he said his eyes and mind didn't occasionally wander. He felt a little bad about it, but it wasn't like he was ever going to do anything other than fantasize, so he supposed it was alright… as long as she didn’t catch on.
Truth be told, he’d always liked Y/N’s personality, but as of recently her looks and the way she dressed had also made her the type of girl he was attracted to on the outside. Yes, it was always the girls who wore alternative clothing and scowled at people like they wanted to break their nose that caught his eye.
He was aware that his preference sounded extremely stereotypical coming from a shy loser like him, but it wasn’t like he could help what he was keen on… or the way his body warmed up whenever he felt the pressure of Y/N’s soft boobs against his side.
“Is the entire chapter on Volcanic Islands really necessary?” She asked, leaning further into him so she could see the laptop screen despite being laid down.
“I'm not sure if it's necessary, but I thought we should at least mention these two hot spring locations since they keep coming up in the articles.” He could feel her sigh of defeat on his arm. “It’s already halfway done. I've already gotten all the info about Iceland… now all that's left is this tiny archipelago from Portugal.” With that, Harry rushed to type the final location on the Google search bar but was taken aback by Y/N's chuckling, that seemed to come out of nowhere. “What are you laughing at?”
“Do you not know how to delete your browsing history?” She asked him, still laughing.
Harry's brows furrowed slightly, but he smiled along. “Huh, why? Seriously random that.”
“Random, really? I may only be half awake, but I can still see.”
“See what?”
“See Pornhub come up on your suggestions when you started typing Portugal.” Harry's face dropped instantly. Then, with a harsh slam, he shut his laptop lid. He could feel his entire body tensing up just as a blazing sensation swept across his face, hotter than he'd ever felt before. “Harry, relax! You look like you’re about to blow up!” Y/N remarked when she saw him like that. She seemed rather worried about it as she clung to his arm to try to calm him down. “Hey, look at me, this isn’t a bad thing. You don't have to-”
Before she could say anything else, Harry curled up in a ball, covered his face with his sheets and muttered, “Yes it is. It’s embarrassing.” Honestly, even that felt like a tame word to describe how he was feeling. This was, hands down, one of the most awkward circumstances he’d ever been in. He wasn't prepared to deal with it, so he chose to remain hidden and avoid further conversation.
He knew he'd have to come out at some point, but he couldn’t bear the thought of facing Y/N knowing that she knew he watched porn and wanked. It was making him feel all kinds of yucky, which was why he was a bit shocked by what happened right after.
Y/N ventured under the sheets after him, and eventually nestled into his side. The warmth felt nice, but being so close to her was weird. He liked it a lot, but it also made him feel worse at the same time, given that she'd been the catalyst for his breakdown in the first place and all that. Plus, he still couldn't wrap his head around why she wanted to touch him when he felt so icky.
Despite the fact that they were right next to each other, it took a while for one of them to venture breaking the silence. By the time Harry tried, he had a dry mouth, so he had to swallow first. “I know it’s not your fault, but I'd honestly rather you hadn't said anything because knowing you saw is making me feel really gross.”
His faltering whispers seemed to stun Y/N a little, as if she'd already accepted that they wouldn't be talking for the rest of the night. “There's no need for you to feel that way… especially not with me.” She returned his hushed words. “I wouldn't have said anything if I knew you'd get like this. I was just trying to be funny.”
“I know, but it still bothers me.” Harry was a little surprised by how at ease he felt speaking in quiet whispers while hiding under his covers. For some reason, talking to Y/N in this setting wasn’t as mortifying as he'd anticipated. “And just to be clear, I have no idea how that stupid website ended up in my suggestions. I always use incognito mode for that stuff.”
He couldn't see her, but he could feel her shrug. “You must have forgotten to open a new tab at some point. It has happened to me before.”
“Oh. So. You watch it too?”
“Doesn't everybody, at least once in a while?”
“I don’t know… I suppose they must, yeah.” They both fell quiet for a bit, but not for longer than a few breaths as Harry felt the urge to clarify something. “I don't want you to think I'm a perv, though. I don't watch it all that often… not the kind of stuff that you’re probably thinking I watch, anyway.”
“What do you think I think you watch?”
“I don’t know, like… classic, scripted porn… you know, the typical “oh no, I’m stuck!” cringe stuff that always shows up on the main page.”
“Um… I’ll be honest, you’ve always came across as more of a Hentai guy to me. And before you say anything, this isn't just me calling you a weeaboo. I’ve watched my share too and overall I think it's much better than that other porn you were talking about.”
“Yeah, fine... I'll admit that I like Hentai, but it’s not all I watch.” Harry wasn't sure why he suddenly felt so keen on sharing, but he was really enjoying their conversation. He found the topic interesting, and he'd never had the chance to discuss it with anybody in person before so… it was fun. And, on top of that, Y/N was disclosing a bit too and he liked that he was getting to know this part of her as well. “Do you know what audio porn is?” She hummed and nodded yes. “Cool, so, there’s this category called ‘guided masturbation’ that’s basically just girls talking and telling you what to do. There’s no visual content really, but it has a very intimate feel to it that I like... almost as if you're on the phone with someone.”
“That's interesting, actually. I always thought that audio porn mostly for women, since, you know... everyone says men are visual creatures.” She shifted her weight slightly, turning towards him. “But you still find real naked girls hot, right? the sight of them?”
“Well, of course. I’d be worried if that wasn’t the case.” Her question struck Harry a little, but he liked that she was acting curious and asking him things. “Honestly, I think the reason why I don't watch more regular porn is because I can't picture myself living out the fantasies. I don’t know, it’s weird to explain.”
“You can’t picture yourself in a sexy plumber costume ready to unclog a hot milf’s pipes?”
Harry snorted. “You're joking, but that's pretty much what it is.”
She hummed as she drew closer to him on the bed. This time her, placing her head into the crook of his arm. Her mouth was closer to Harry's ear in this position, although he wasn't aware of this until he heard, and felt, her whisper again. “Is that why you like it when girls tell you what to do? because it seems a little more plausible?”
Harry wasn't usually one to cuss, but shit. Hearing her whisper that somewhat snarky question so close to his ear struck a chord with him. It was freaking hot and kind of reminded him a bit of the audios he liked. Obviously, it wasn't as explicit, but it was better in many ways. A huge downside to the experience, however, was that it was extremely difficult to concentrate afterward. In fact, in the midst of his thoughts, Harry almost forgot to reply. “Um… I guess? I’m sorry, I kind of forgot what the question was.”
“No, it’s all good. I’m sure you must be getting tired.” With that, Y/N crawled out from under the covers. As she did so, her hand stumbled onto Harry’s toppled over laptop. “Oh, I didn’t even notice this was here. We should probably turn it off, right? Assuming you don't want to keep working after this.”
Harry also came out from hiding and sat up in a position similar to hers, with his legs partially covered by the covers. As his eyes re-acclimated to the brightness of the room, he massaged them a little. “Sure. I’ll just need a moment to, uh… make sure the file got saved properly, if that’s okay.”
Taking advantage of his temporary blindness, Y/N snatched his pillow from his side of the bed. She tucked it under herself and slid back under the sheets. “I've got a comfy bed already so… feel free to take as much time as you need.”
He laughed at her antics as he readjusted the laptop over his legs and opened it. Turns out the file had been autosaved, but Harry still saved it once more before switching off his computer and setting it over his desk. “Yeah, that's fine. I don’t mind giving you my bed for the night and sleeping on the air mattress for a change.”
“Or you could spare yourself and sleep right there instead of stressing about which one of us will be sleeping on the floor.”
Her offer caused his eyebrows to rise, but he wasn't sure if that was a good thing to do. He liked the idea of it but was a little concerned about accidentally doing something embarrassing in the middle of the night. What if he made a toot? Or worse, had a wet dream? He hadn't had any recently, but one never knew when it might start happening again. In any case, he'd probably wake up with a stupid morning wood as usual, which was something that he could typically make go away before he got up when Y/N was around… but if she was going to sleep next to him, wasn’t there a chance she could tell? That prospect made him terrified. “Um… I'm not sure that I'm a good sleep partner; My grandma says I used to move a lot in my sleep when I was small.”
“Oh. I don’t mind. I just really don't want to go to sleep by myself for some reason.” Y/N shrugged, leaving him unsure of what to say next. It was already difficult to say no when it wasn’t what he wanted to say, but it became nearly impossible when he looked at her and met her begging eyes.
Well then, if she was being so casual about it, he figured it must not be that common for people to do humiliating things in their sleep, contrary to what he had previously been led to believe by his insecurities. The other factor that was pushing him to say yes was that having to get up to grab the air mattress from the attic and make Y/N a bed sounded a little too demanding for how lazy he was feeling. His bed wasn't even tiny either, so they'd have plenty of room to spread out without troubling one another throughout the night. “Ok, alright. But don't grumble tomorrow about having trouble falling asleep because of me. This was entirely your idea.”  
“I don’t grumble.” He made sure to let her see his eyeroll before turning off the lights and getting into bed with a second pillow for himself. No one said anything for a bit, they were just adjusting their positions in search for the most comfortable one. Harry was still wide-awake, but he believed it wouldn't be long until Y/N fell asleep. She was already close to when they were working on the paper, so it shouldn't take long at all.
She proved him wrong, though, when she blurted out something after minutes of being quiet. “I have another question for you...”
“Oh. What’s that?”
Harry saw a shadow that he believed to be her head poking up from the pillow, propped on what should be her arm. Her voice sounded quite chirpy too, which meant he’d probably underestimated how awake and willing to chat his friend actually was. “Have you ever… like, kissed anyone?”
“That’s so random.” It was during times like these that Harry wished he could travel back in time. If he could turn back the clock and pretend to be asleep two seconds ago when Y/N asked if she could ask him a question, he wouldn’t even think twice. Heck, he'd even pretend to snore if it meant not having to respond but alas, since Harry didn’t have any time travel abilities, that wasn’t an option anymore. She knew he was awake and was anxiously awaiting his response. “You're quite random sometimes, Y/N...”
Her voice was hushed, yet a little taunting. “That’s not an answer.”
Harry sighed, realizing she wasn't going to let him off the hook until he participated in the discussion she wanted to have. “Alright, then… define kissing... does something like a peck qualify?”
“No, Harry. I'm talking about actual kissing. Tongue and all.”
“Oh um. I knew that, obviously.”
“And did you do it or not?”
“Yeah I, uh. I've kissed...” His words stumbled slightly. They didn't come out as cool or confident as he’d hoped, but he did try to make his statement sound plausible. “But it wasn’t with a lot of tongue... just like, a little bit.”
Y/N let out a snort at his unconvincing answer. “You’re a shit liar, but fine. I used to lie about it too when people asked me.” Rather than defending himself, Harry didn't say anything, which told his friend all she needed to know. “Is it something you think about, though? would you like to do it?”
“Well, yeah… of course I’d like to. Even some of the guys I hang out with have done it... and you’ve seen them.” Harry felt a bit mean making that remark about his friends' looks. Obviously, he wanted them to have someone who liked them, but that didn’t change the fact that none of them had much going in terms of physical appeal. “I'm not saying this to make you feel sorry for me. I know I’m the problem and that the reason why I haven’t kissed yet is because I’m not a kissable person. My only hope is that things will change once we start college. I don't know if I ever told you before, but I would really like to get contacts soon. I was also thinking it could be nice to start exercising more just so clothes would fit me better. What do you think? It should help, right?”
Even in total darkness, Harry could tell that Y/N's eyebrows were deeply furrowed by her tone of voice. “Who was it that told you you weren't kissable?”
“Nobody needed to tell me. I see myself every time I look in the mirror. I dress like my grandpa and have a bit of a hunch like him too.”
“I think you're mistaking being unattractive for wearing clothes that aren’t particularly flattering. It's very different.” Harry knew she couldn't see it, but he was kissing his teeth at what she’d said. “If the reason why you want to make those changes is to feel better about yourself, then you have my full support… I do, however, have a feeling that’s not all it is, so I hope you realize that you don’t have to bend over backwards to be likable or kissable, or anything else. You already are all of those things exactly as you are.”
“I appreciate you sugarcoating things in order to cheer me up but if what you are saying were true, and I was fine the way I am, I wouldn't have this much trouble finding someone who saw that in me.” He sighed, a little annoyed by her efforts. “Don’t take this the wrong way, but it’s hard for me to believe you’ll ever understand what it feels like to be me. You’re like... the coolest, most kissable girl ever.”
There was a slight click, and suddenly the room got soaked in an orange light that caused Harry to squint despite his familiarity with it. His bedside table lamp was on, and Y/N was staring at him in awe. “You think I’m kissable?”
Crap. Had he really blurted it out that way? He couldn't recall the precise words he had used, but it seemed unlikely that Y/N was asking him that for no reason. She looked very taken aback by what she’d heard, and Harry, who still hadn't a clue how he’d managed to put his foot in it yet again, felt his face turn red and his tongue stutter once more. “Not in a weird way! Maybe I phrased it in a way that made it seem like I was being weird, but it was just a form of expression. Not that what I said isn’t true, but I would never say it like that. Even if I wanted to kiss you, which has never crossed my mind until now, really. I don't know why my brain decided to picture that ridiculous scenario all of sudden.”
“Hm.” Y/N’s gaze was drawn to her hands as he finished. Harry observed that she was picking at her nail polish, which was rather unusual for her unless she was getting nervous. “Is it really that ridiculous? I mean, if you wanted to, I wouldn't mind...”
His forehead wrinkled. “Why? Because you feel sorry for me?”
“No Harry, because I'd like to.”
“Me? You’d like to kiss me? Why?”
Y/N shrugged her shoulders. “I don’t know.” Her tone was a little hesitant, but she carried on. “Aff, okay… screw it. I might as well tell you since we’re talking about it. So, I, uh. I have a bit of a thing for you. I’ve had it for a while, but it was never too serious… just a little crush since well, I never really felt like there was a real possibility that it could be reciprocated. That’s why I didn’t tell you sooner, that and because I wasn't sure how things would turn out if you rejected me so… I figured it would be best not to say anything.” She shrugged once more, as a small smile formed on her lips. “You’ve also never mentioned having any crushes or expressed attraction for anyone in particular, so I thought maybe you weren't interested in that type of stuff much.”
“Yeah, right.” Harry rolled over in bed, facing away from her. It wasn’t unusual of Y/N to play practical jokes on him from time to time, but this one did not go over well with him. It seriously screwed with his self-esteem and since it was her, he could have easily been tricked into admitting something regarding his feelings, what made it even worse. “I know you’re taking the piss and I don’t think it’s funny at all.”
“Why would I be taking the piss? Do you really think I'd joke about something like this? And look at me when I'm speaking to you!” She pulled on his shoulder, compelling him to lie onto his back so she could at least see his face.
Harry complied with her, but not without a groan. “I'm serious Y/N. If you’re trolling, this is your one chance to say so ‘cause If I find out later that you were doing this to trick me or to see me make a fool of myself or to get me flustered, I'm going to get really, really angry at you.”
“I may play a lot of dumb jokes, but I don't play with people's feelings like that… let alone my friends' feelings. I'm dead serious, Harry. It's really not that hard to see it if you think a little.” She huffed, upset that he wasn’t taking her seriously. She'd guessed he’d act a little wary at first but hadn't expected him to think she was pulling a prank on him. How could he have missed that she had a thing for him anyway, with how touchy she was when they were alone together? With her acting so eager to be his first kiss? She'd been shit at hiding it for years. It was so clear. “Do you remember that time when we were 9, my parents took us to a fancy playground with boats and there was a girl there who had a Nintendo but wouldn't let me play with it, she would only let you, so I snatched it from your hands?”
"Yeah, I remember.” As he replied, Harry was unable to stop himself from letting out small laugh at the memory. “And then you threw it in the water because you'd heard from someone at school that Nintendo’s were waterproof. All the parents got so mad, and the girl wouldn't stop crying. It was awful.”
“Yeah, that. Except, I never really thought that they were waterproof. I did it because she was pretty... and it made me upset that you’d replaced me with her and left me to play alone, despite her being mean to me.” Y/N admitted, also laughing and shaking her head a bit at her childish antics. “Obviously I didn't know back then what being jealous was, but I think about that day a lot... it makes me feel embarrassed of what I did, but it also makes me realize that I've always been really possessive of you. I think if you'd turn out to have many girlfriends you would have realized much sooner that my feelings for you weren't just friendly ones.”
“Wow. Was that really what that was?” Harry was stupefied and Y/N couldn't not giggle at his open mouthed reaction. “I’m sorry, it’s just… this whole thing is really confusing. My head is spinning a bit and... being completely honest, part of me still thinks that you’re joking but at the same time, you seem serious enough so I’m gonna choose to believe you. Even if I have no idea why you'd like me that way, other than maybe ‘cause I have green eyes and am tall.
“The hair too. Don't forget your fluffy hair.” She added playfully. “No but, I like all of those things obviously, but they aren’t the reason why I like you. I just do. There’s no logical explanation for it.”
“Yeah, um. That makes sense. I mean, not really but I think I understand that feeling you were describing and… I can kind of relate to it too since I've kind of had a small crush too since last year… or well, I've realized last year... back when you were dating that Joshua guy. It made me a little jealous. I’ve always thought it was silly though, so I tried not to think about it too much.” Harry acknowledged, albeit doing it with more trepidation and delay than Y/N had. “I've had other crushes too, but they were on girls I never talked to so... they didn’t last too long.”
“Wait so… you’ve had a crush too? since that long?”
“I- uh.. I have. Yeah.”
“You must be really good at hiding your feelings then, because I never noticed anything that suggested that, much less that you were jealous. Trust me, if I had any inkling I would’ve had this conversation with you last year instead of doing what I did. I didn’t even like Joshua much… I just wanted to have someone.” She pursed her lips in a mournful smile before reaching out for Harry's hand. It wasn’t the first time that their hands had brushed, but this time something in Harry's chest was sparked by her touch, making him feel both ecstatic and stiff at the same time. “It's nice that you've had other crushes, though. I think I'd be more upset if I found out you'd been caught up on me all this time and I'd just been completely unaware of it. With that said, I don't want you thinking about other girls now. Only me.”
“Yeah, okay. Just you. I like how that sounds a lot.” Harry had no idea what had possessed him, but he felt compelled to bring her hand to his mouth and kiss it. His gesture made her giggle, but he got somewhat self-conscious afterwards. “Was that lame? Probably, right?”
“No, it was cute. I loved it.” She reciprocated by lifting his hand to her mouth and placing a kiss over his knuckles. “Is there anywhere else you’d like me to kiss?”
With a tentative smile, he gave her a direct glance before nodding. Y/N scooted a bit closer to him but as they got closer, Harry's body tightened a little. He couldn't take his eyes off her lips, yet the sight of the rosy, fluffy cushions was giving him pause. “I’m sorry if I’m not… uh… if I don’t know how to...”
She gave his cheek a comforting caress. “That’s fine, but are you okay? You’re shaking a bit.”
Harry laughed, feeling rather frustrated with himself. “Yeah, um… sorry about that. I'm just really nervous.”
“It can wait if you're not ready.” Y/N made a point of assuring him, even though she had a feeling that waiting wasn't what Harry wanted. He was just nervous, which was totally normal for someone who was about to get their first kiss. The most she could do was try to make him a bit calmer. “Is there anything specific that you're worried about?”
“No, I’m ready. It's just a bit overwhelming. This is all so alien to me… knowing you like me and all, it’s a lot for my nervous system to handle.” Y/N couldn’t not frown a bit at how adorable he was as she listened. “I- I'm also a little in over my head, thinking I probably won’t be as good as the boys you've kissed before.”
“You don't have to worry about that, really. Trying stuff until you figure out what makes the other person melt is one of the most fun parts.” She assured, before giving his hand another kiss. “We’ll learn that from one another, okay?”
Harry nodded. “Yeah, okay.”
Upon his approval, Y/N pulled herself closer and higher, until her face was barely above his. They both smiled as she rubbed her nose against his... once, twice, and then it happened. She dropped her head just enough for their lips to touch.
Her tenderness and Harry's stomach-bursting butterflies were in stark contrast, making for a bizarre, yet fascinating combination of sensations.
They weren't quite in time with one another's lips but their kiss was free flowing. And it felt flawless, akin to a Vivaldi concerto or a Michelangelo masterpiece. There was something alarming about it too, however. Suddenly, Harry could feel the relatively insignificant seed of love that Y/N had planted in his heart blossom into a giant sequoia tree. And he couldn't, for the life of him, fathom the possibility of having shared a moment as nice with anyone else.
He was truly loving whatever love spell she was casting on his body with her kissing, which is why he couldn't help but let out a low whimper when he felt their lips unglue from her pulling away. “Why did you- why did you stop?”
“Your stupid glasses are getting in my way.” She explained as she carefully started pulling them off his face. “Here, much better.” As soon as she was done placing his glasses over the nightstand, she raised her leg and straddled him. Well, sort of. It was more of an embrace; except she was laying on top of him. “This is okay, right? Not too much pressure?”
“Mh-mm. Better. Thank you.” Harry's face was flushed, and he couldn't stop smiling as he stared at her. She was so pretty, and her tummy against his felt so cozy. It was still hard to believe he had kissed her, but the sensation on his lips confirmed it was real, despite how uncanny it all felt. “I like this a lot, being this close to you.”
“Me too.” She ran her fingertips across his blushing skin. “You're so cute like this. I should’ve kissed you way sooner. You seem to like it too, don't you?”
“Mh-mm. I really do.” Harry desperately wanted more kisses from her, but he was still a little too unsure of himself to initiate. Besides, he’d really liked when she took initiative earlier and led the way so that’s what he wanted to happen again. “I’d like to do it some more, if that’s okay...”
Y/N smiled at his request, but wasted no time before she leaned in to taste his lips again.
It was mostly just smooches that they were trading, but that didn’t keep her from taking a nibble here and there. Harry was very responsive to her nibbles, which she appreciated. She’d never been with a boy who got whimpery and breathy just from making out before, but she found it to be incredibly encouraging and arousing.
What made it extra hot was knowing he wasn't doing it on purpose because he knew girls liked stuff like that. It was just how his body was reacting to her. She was also well aware that her kisses had gotten him bricked up instantaneously. His warm stiffness was palpable between her thighs, despite being covered by his pajama bottoms.
If it had been any of the boys she’d kissed before, the erection would have freaked her out a bit, but as it was Harry she thought it was cute that he was so excited. He wasn't the only one feeling this way though. The damp panties she had on served as a casual reminder that she was getting quite excited as well.
Despite her wants, Y/N had been doing a great job of controlling herself… only that task became much more challenging when Harry started getting more comfortable, more intuitive, and by default, touchier. At some point in the course of their kissing, he’d started sliding his hands up her back and, on occasion, giving her hips a squeeze. He'd noticed she was pleased by this, so he worked up the nerve to lower his hands to her bum and squeeze her there too.
“Not feeling so shy anymore, are you?” Y/N playfully teased, to which Harry responded by smiling and hiding his face by pulling her in for a hug. It hadn't been her intention to rub up on him, but he’d drew her in so close that their bellies were flush together, so when she shifted next he felt it on his crotch… and moaned, all deep and throaty. They stared at each other, until Y/N turned her mouth to Harry's ear and asked, “Do you want this? want me to do it again?”
His nodding was quick. “Just don't go too fast, ‘cause uh... might feel too good.”
“Okay, got it.” She said, then held onto the pillow under Harry’s head, nails digging into fabric as she began to move slowly on top of him. Rolling her hips to press down on the bulge in his pants. The pressure on her clit was both a blessing and a curse. On the one hand, it was a relief to finally have a way to sooth some of the built-up tension, but on the other, it made her yearn for more friction. She was being good and taking it nice and slow like Harry had asked though.
Still, she could feel his heavy, strained breathing against her skin. “Mm, it's too much, feels… too good. Ah-” He moaned again, once her fingers gripped at the roots of his hair.
“Shh, quiet.” Y/N covered his mouth and smiled. “I love your moans, but we have to keep it quiet.” She said, before removing her hand from his mouth and putting her lips in its place.
“I know, sorry.” Harry replied once she broke their kiss. “If I get loud again, you can repeat that hand thing if you want… it was hot.”
“Hmm, was it?” She returned her hand to his lips, but this time she allowed two fingers to go inside and prod into his mouth, that he was keeping slightly ajar for her. “That’s good, Harry. You're a natural at this, I think.” She had been straddling him with her body leaning over his, but she sat upright for a moment to appreciate how adorable he looked with her fingers in his mouth from farther away. As soon as he saw her eyes fixed on him, his lips encircled her fingers, and his tongue began to softly wriggle between them. “Mh-m... that's it. Just like that.”
As she started moving her hips again, Harry's hands shot to her waist, to hold her as she rutted against him. This gave her more balance, so she ramped up the pace, rubbing harder and faster to create the desired friction for her. The change caught up with Harry quickly, who began groan restlessly into her fingers in response. She pulled them off to let him speak. “S-slow... please go slower. If you don't, I'll-”
“Make a mess. I know. Give me your hands.” As per Y/N’s request, Harry slid his hands away from her waist and held them up between their bodies. Y/N took them, entwined their fingers together and then without warning, allowed her weight to fall forward, successfully pinning him to the bed. “I know you want to, but you're ashamed about doing it in your underwear. So, I was thinking… if I keep you like this and force it out of you, maybe you won't feel so bad about wanting it anymore. What do you say?”
“I just don't want to get you dirty, that's all. I thought I could keep it under control a little better, but I can't. It feels so much better than my hand.” Harry acknowledged, smiling shyly. “That sounds hot, though… the idea of you forcing it.”
“I know but don't worry about getting me dirty. I brought extra pjs.” She gave him a reassuring smile and squeezed his hands. “So…you want to do it, then? Since you think it’s hot…”
A delaying groan rumbled in his throat before his lips parted into a broad smile, the kind of smile you make when you’re on the verge of breaking into laugher. “I’m going be so embarrassed about this tomorrow, but yeah. I want to.”
Y/N shook her head at him, grinning. “Don't. I've always wanted to do this. It's a bit of a fantasy of mine, I guess.” She didn’t give him a chance to react to her confession, as she started rutting against his cock again. This time she wasn’t being gentle or avoiding any harsh friction. Her movements were quicker and jerkier than they had been before, and she tightened her hold on his hands as well. She had a hunch Harry liked the feeling of being held down and used, so that's what she was doing.
He was shivering beneath her, taking fast breaths through his mouth as he looked her in the eyes. The poor baby couldn’t stay quiet for the life of him, either. His whimpers and groans were unrelenting, so she was bound to muffle him once more.
His now-free hand joined hers over his mouth, but it didn’t linger there for long since he took hold of her wrist and started guiding it downward. “My neck,” He pleaded lowly, his voice trembling. “…want your hand on my neck.”
She gave him a devilish smirk before grabbing his throat. She only needed to hold him still; there was no need to squeeze or do anything else. “And I want your cum,” she told him, hoping that slipping in a few dirty words in combination with her movements would make him snap. “…want my thighs all wet and sticky from it.”
Harry’s legs jerked beneath her. “Close,” He warned, a little startled. “So, so close…” The fact that she could not only hear him but also feel his words on his throat as he spoke was incredibly arousing. “Please…” He pled sweetly, what triggered a sudden desire in Y/N's chest to be closer. She released her hold on his throat and hugged him tight as she drove her hips into his, rutting violently to make him orgasm.
It worked.
Between her thighs, Y/N could feel his warm juices seeping through the material of her pajamas. So she kept rutting, wanting to make sure she had extracted every last drop of them.
Harry returned her tight hug all the way through his climax, and he didn’t let go after either. They remained in that position for a while, holding each other close regardless of the slightly unpleasant wetness that was binding them together. “We should probably change right?” Y/N asked after a beat, despite her lack of want to wrest away from him.
“M-hm. I’m all gross and sticky.” Harry laughed. “I’m gonna need another shower in the morning, but for now, I think I'll just wipe it off and put on new boxers. I mean if you don't mind that I don't wear pants to bed…”
“No, I don't mind. I'm gonna take mine off too.”
“Oh. That's a great idea. Sounds perfect to me.” Harry playfully quipped, before he got out of bed and started opening drawers. “Also, um… I don't know how to ask without being weird, but could you close your eyes for a moment? so I can take care of myself real quick?” Y/N said yes and turned away to give him privacy while he cleaned himself and changed. She was a tiny bit surprised that he hadn't wanted to use the restroom for that, but she figured that since it was closer to his grandparents' bedroom at the end of the corridor, he probably didn't want to risk going and waking them up. “Okay… you can look now.”
When Y/N looked at him next, the first thing she noticed was that he had on a pair of tight, black boxers. The next thing she noticed was that Harry was looking at her legs, since, as he’d probably seen when he turned, she had also stripped off her pants in the interim, leaving just her grey panties on. “What?” He smiled in response to her curious gaze.
She wouldn’t bring it up, but she could see he had grown a little hard in his boxers just from seeing her sprawled in bed with no pants on. “Nothing, you’re cute.”
Harry snorted at that. “Thanks, but you're much cuter.” He wandered across the room to where the supermarket bags were. “Are you thirsty? Do you want water or a snack? ”
“Hmm, just water if that’s okay.”
Harry handed her the water bottle and sat down on the bed next to her while she drank from it. “You didn’t cum…” he pointed out after a moment of pause.
“Oh um… yeah. I didn’t. It’s okay though.” Y/N laughed, shrugged, and took another sip of her water.
“Hmm.” Harry hummed, before scooting a little closer to her. “It must be a bit of an unpleasant feeling, no? and hard to sleep like that.”
“It is a little until it goes away but nothing that I can't handle.”
“Hm.” He hummed again, before Y/N cocked her head to kiss his lips. She’d only meant to give him a peck, but Harry changed her plans when he leaned in to kiss her deeper. He seemed really eager to continue kissing and well, she wasn't about to say no to him. Especially when he went so far as to nibble on her lip, which he hadn’t done before. He was also getting handsy with her, and she loved it. He was touching her more and focusing on the spots he'd learned she liked.
“That,” She blurted, as she paused to catch her breath. “That feels really nice.”
“M-hm.” He murmured against her lips as he kissed her again. His hand continued to grab at her as they kissed, to the point where Y/N couldn’t take it anymore. She hadn’t meant to but ended up moving her knees apart out of desperation. Being so blatant almost made her feel ashamed, but she didn't because she felt Harry's palm wrap over her crotch. In response to his touch, she moaned into his mouth, and he moaned back, surprised at how her moisture had soaked through her panties. “Teach me.” He asked, softly. “I want to learn. I- um, want to make you go to sleep happy.”
“That’s so nice, Harry, really. I, um-” She smiled while wiping the tears forming in her eyes. “I’m already happy.” She didn’t know what was making her so overwhelmed with joy all of sudden. She’d always known Harry was boyfriend material, but it was still nice to see how much he gave thought to her needs and happiness. And she was happy. So, so happy to finally have him like this, all to herself. “Do you want me to show you how to touch?”
“Yes please. To make you feel good.”
“Okay.” She placed her hand on top of his. “Here,” she explained once she’d guided his fingers to the spot of her panties right above her clit. “Circular motions with your fingers feel really nice, so does pressure. You don't have to focus on just that spot though… the nicest feeling is when you rub there but also all over.” She glanced at him, then bit her lip and asked, “Wanna try?”
“Yeah, alright.” Harry responded, adjusting his position slightly so that Y/N could get more comfortable. They decided to have her sit between his legs, facing away from him since that would make it easier for her to lead him. Once they’d both settled, Harry began to touch her in the way she had showed him, moving his hand broadly enough to reach a little bit everywhere in between her legs. “Am I doing it right?”
“Mm-hmm, you're doing really good.” Y/N was still holding his hand while he touched her, and she was fascinated by the size difference between their hands. “Your hands are really big, which... makes it feel extra good.”
“Really? That’s nice. I'm definitely grateful for that.” He said while looking down as well. “Should I put more pressure, or is it okay as it is?”
“It’s fine but I wouldn’t mind a little more...” She could tell he was afraid of hurting her, and that’s why he was being so careful and gentle in his touching. She wasn’t planning on rushing him or constantly give him directions though, so instead she simply relaxed against his chest and let him probe at his own pace. Because, after all, even though he was playing safe, she was still thoroughly enjoying herself.
It took Harry a few minutes to figure out how much pressure and speed he should be using, but eventually he pressed and swirled his fingers around her sensitive nub in a way that felt just right. When Y/N’s breath faltered he glanced at her worriedly, what made her chuckle. “No, don't worry. You didn't hurt me.” She took advantage of his staring to steal a kiss from his lips. “Keep going like that.”
Harry smiled proudly at that. He’d had a feeling he was starting to get the hang of it due to the way Y/N’s breathing had become more erratic and she'd begun to quiver against him on occasion but hearing it from her mouth that he was doing a good job was much, much better. He was really looking forward to making her cum. She looked so pretty like this, flushed and a little out of breath. She'd been staring at his face a lot from over her shoulder in the last couple of minutes, biting her lip and letting out little hums of pleasure to let him know he was making her feel good.
“Like that. Don’t stop.” Those quiet, whispered words snapped him out of his reverie. He knew what they meant, even before she told him, “I’m really, really close.”
He'd learnt from a meme he saw once that when girls said that boys weren't meant to speed up or change what they were doing in the slightest, so he merely focused on adding a bit more pressure, since that was something he knew she liked, and trying to keep his hand's tempo.
Despite how hot he found it, Harry wasn't very comfortable with dirty talk, but seeing her like this and recalling the perfect, filthy words she'd said to him just before making him cum, he felt compelled to give it a shot. “I can feel how wet your panties are, it’s so hot.” He whispered into her hair. “I can smell it too and it makes me want to eat you out so bad. I've never done it before, but I can't stop thinking about doing it to you.” Rather than trying to sound hot, he was simply stating facts about how she was making him feel, and somehow it was working. “I wanna make you cum like this first though. From rubbing your little pussy this way, just like you taught me to.”
Harry's words, paired with the precise movements of his fingertips around her pussy got her right at the edge. She trembled, clutched his wrist, and strained to keep her legs open.
“Please, please, please...” She started begging out loud right before the warm pleasure bubble on her belly popped, so Harry did the same thing she’d done to him and muffled her by putting his hand over her mouth.
He hadn't anticipated being able to feel when a girl orgasmed, but he was. He could feel the strong pulse under his fingers as soon as Y/N started to cum, and it was one of the hottest things he’d ever experienced. He could also feel the damp spot on her panties becoming even more drenched as he stroked her through it and God, the smell… it was making his mouth water.
If she didn’t look so exhausted, Harry would have begged her to let him take off her panties and lick her clean, but those puffy, glossy eyes didn't permit his mind to stray any further. If there was one thing Harry understood about Y/N, it was how she looked just before falling asleep, and that was exactly how she was getting.
So he helped her into bed and lay down beside her, but his heart wouldn't let him fall asleep before he asked, “You’re staying for the entire weekend, right?” and his ears picked up a faint “M-hm” in return.
A smile spread across Harry’s face as she pulled him in for a cuddle.
This was going to be the best weekend ever.
**
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suuuupernovaaa · 1 year
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tìyo’
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tìyo’ [tɪ.ˈjoʔ̚] n. perfection
Anonymous Request: Could you write a neteyam x reader as she fell first, he fell harder trope and by harder I mean him literally being obsessed with her (in a good way ofc)?
3.2k words
Though our clan was large, it was not so large that I did not grow up knowing all the other children my age, and those my older brother's age, as well.
Neteyam wasn't my brother's friend, per se, but he did run in similar circles; after all, they were small circles. My brother was unimpressed with the chief's son, but he was unimpressed with most people, so it wasn't surprising.
I paid Neteyam little to no mind until we were older. Lo'ak was my age, but we scarcely interacted, though I thought he was a nice boy, if not a little reckless. 
In our pre-teen years, Lo'ak and I had come together by happenstance; going on the same hunts, choosing our ikrans on the same day, finding out we had common interests and overbearingly perfect older siblings. 
In our growing, still casual friendship, it was then that I really noticed Neteyam.
At first, I was just impressed and somewhat intimidated by him. Even though he was barely 17, he was the best hunter in our clan, by far. He was also an impressive fisherman, skilled at weaving nets and tossing his spear, and on top of it all, he seemed, from our limited interaction, kind and caring.
Lo'ak complained about him, but I knew they were close, and he admired his brother, the way I did mine. It was almost a resentful admiration; our brothers possessed qualities that were admired by all, that we didn't possess.
Neteyam was a model eldest son, admired by all and rarely admonished by his parents - Lo'ak was a little wild, erring on the side of breaking the rules.
No'vu and I had a different dynamic. He was the wild one, with a free spirit and very little care towards what others thought of him. I had always been more reserved and buttoned up, cautious and a little anxious, and I envied his relaxed demeanor. 
It brought Lo'ak and I closer, as friends, and afforded me more opportunities to be around Neteyam. And every time I was near him, my crush deepened, until I was nearly 21, and the crush was turning into something more; something I was almost growing worried about.
Because I didn't think he had really noticed me, and wasn't sure he ever would.
--
All of the responsibilities that come with being the oldest son of the Olo'eyktan had nearly taken over Neteyam's life, and by the time he was approaching 23 years old, he realized how all-consuming they had become.
His father was still young, very healthy, and would be their leader for years to come.
Neteyam felt now that he was ready to step back from training, to live a life and find a mate, and enjoy himself before true responsibility sat on his shoulders.
It wasn't easy to approach his father and tell him this, but surprisingly, Jake understood. Maybe years of focused training had paid off, plus, Jake did mention this would afford him more time to focus on Lo'ak, who he sometimes worried felt overlooked. 
The next morning, Neteyam woke up feeling directionless. Without a rigorous schedule to follow, he wasn't sure what to do with his time. His father had woken Lo'ak up early for a hunt, and he knew Lo'ak would be equally pleased and pissed, so Neteyam simply rolled out of his hammock and grabbed something to eat.
"What will you do today?" Kiri asked, and Neteyam just shrugged in response. "Come help me then," Kiri said. "No'vu and Y/N's mother is ill, and I'm paying her a visit."
With nothing really better to do, Neteyam agreed. It would be interesting to watch Kiri work, and he hadn't spent much time with her lately. He knew No’vu, but hadn’t been aware the wild Omaticayan man a sibling. Y/N was an unfamiliar name to him. He wondered if she was as brash and fearless as her brother was known to be.
When they arrived to the family's home, Eik Te lay on the floor, covered by a blanket, with her daughter at her side. She appeared to be asleep at first, but Neteyam noticed then that her eyes were open, just barely. She looked beyond sick - she looked gravely ill.
Kiri knelt by her side, next to Y/N, who was holding her mother's hand. No'vu was pacing outside the hut, and their father, Onpxew, was nowhere to be seen - likely hunting or fishing for the family.
"How is she today?" Kiri asked, and Y/N tried to muster up a smile, glancing up at Neteyam.
"Better," she said. "She said a few words, drank a little water. Better than yesterday."
Kiri sighed. "Good, that's good."
She rummaged through the basket she had brought, pulling out different powders and liquids, mixing something together. She felt the woman's forehead, focusing. "Her fever seems to be going down. I think this will pass, but it may be a few days yet before we can be sure."
Y/N nodded, looking stoically down at her mother, who's eyes were open a little wider now.
"Thank you, Kiri," Eik Te said, her voice dry and slow, and Kiri shushed her.
"You just get better. Step outside with me, Y/N," Kiri said. "Oh, also, this is Neteyam. He's learning a little about healing today."
Y/N stood up, and nodded to Neteyam. "We've met," she said.
Neteyam was sure that was true, but he didn't remember this woman - which surprised him. 
When she stood, she was taller than average - much taller than Kiri, likely taller than her mother, and most other women in the clan. Her eyes were wide, a beautiful amber, and the spots around them danced even in the day light. Her hair was long, nearly to her waist, braided in tiny braids that looked like they must've taken days to complete.
As they walked, she carried herself with assuredness and grace. As she and Kiri spoke outside about her mother's condition, he watched her round lips move over straight, white teeth.
He had never seen anyone so beautiful. He tried to remember her, but nothing was coming to mind. Had he truly met her, and overlooked her?
Before he knew it, Kiri was saying her goodbyes, and Neteyam felt obligated to say something. "Let us know if you need anything, Y/N. I'm happy to hunt for you, or bring you more blankets and rugs."
Y/N smiled, and it was stunning, practically stopping his heart. "Thank you, Neteyam."
Next to him, Kiri was rolling his eyes. "I just said that. Let's go." She pulled on her brother's arm, and reluctantly, he followed her.
--
After that day, Neteyam saw Y/N everywhere he went. She was at the fire pits when he brought in a kill, and she was ascending to ride her ikran at the same time as him; she was even at the same swimming hole. When he wasn't running into her, he was thinking about her, and asking Kiri for anything she knew about the girl - which wasn't much. Just that she was quiet, seemed very much unlike her rash older brother, close to her family, and a very talented ikran rider; one of the most impressive in the clan.
Neteyam obsessed over her, going over every detail of her again and again in his mind; her tall stature, her soft, light voice, the concern in her eyes when she spoke to Kiri about her mother; he even dreamed about her at night.
He wondered what he had thought about, before he met her, and he wondered how it was possible that he had never before noticed someone like her. 
Four days later, they were finally able to speak, when Neteyam ran into her just outside of Home Tree.
"Y/N," he said, jogging over to her. "How is your mother?"
He could see the relief in her eyes as she smiled. "So much better, thank you! Kiri is a miracle worker. I am trying to think of a gift for her, actually. What would she like? I could make a necklace, or…”
Netyeam blurted out the first thing he could think of. "A friend."
Y/N's eyebrows rose. "Oh? Well that's certainly an easy gift to give. After all, Lo'ak is already a friend."
Lo'ak was friends with Y/N? Since when? Jealously sparked in Neteyam. "Sit with my family, at the feast tomorrow. You can... talk to Kiri," he said. But of course, that wasn't why Neteyam wanted her to join his family.
She reached out, touching his arm just momentarily, and he froze up at her gentle touch. "I'd be glad to! Come find me before, so I don't wander around looking for you."
--
Mom was still tired, so the rest of my family was staying behind and skipping the celebratory feast, but my father insisted I go - especially after he found out I had been asked to sit with Lo'ak's family.
Or should I be referring to them as Neteyam's family?
Our meeting earlier had been so strange. The nervous energy around Neteyam was catching, and I felt a little anxious as I dressed for the feast. Mom painted my face, down to my chest, and the moment she was done, No'vu was announcing Neteyam's approach.
Wanting to avoid an awkward encounter with my family and the eldest son of Taruk Makto, I charged out of our alcove to meet Neteyam, waving and calling goodbye over my shoulder.
Neteyam looked stunned to see me charging towards him and I stopped, a little embarrassed at my eagerness. "Sorry," I said when I reached him. "Mom is still feeling a little sick. I didn't want to disturb her."
"Oh, sure," Neteyam nodded, and an awkward pause surfaced between us that I was unsure how to get over.
When I was with Lo'ak, he did most of the talking. Neteyam was a little more quiet than his younger brother.
"You look beautiful," he said, and my jaw nearly fell open.
I had been trying to figure out all day why Neteyam would invite me to sit with his family, as the idea of him hoping I would become friends with Kiri seemed unlikely, but I couldn't sort out another motive.
It seemed impossible that it could be because he wanted to spend time with me. After all, I could tell the other day when he and Kiri had come to visit mom, that when I said we'd met before, he had no recollection.
It had stung a little bit, but ever since then, he'd been looking at me so funny every time we ran into each other. If I didn't know better, I would've thought he was staring, but I couldn't figure out why.
"Thank you," I replied, casting my eyes downward. "Let's go!" 
He extended his hand, and eagerly, I took it.
As we walked, Neteyam asked me about my ikran, and even though he couldn't have known, it was the easiest way to get me to open up. I talked about her the entire way; our first meeting, our best rides, everything we'd accomplished together and how much I loved her.
"She's my best friend," I said with a shrug. "I know that's kind of silly but she's just, so wonderful. You'll have to meet her."
"I would love to," Neteyam replied with a smile.
The festival was well underway when we arrived at the Tree of Souls, the drums pounding, the smell of spices and fresh food in the air.
Pulling my hand, Neteyam wove his way through the crowd, to the Tree of Souls, where his family and those closest to them sat.
Neteyam nodded to his father, who nodded back. "Father, this is Y/N, daughter of Onpxew and Eik Te."
"How's your mother?" Jakesully asked.
"Thank you, Olo'eyektan," I replied, touching my hand to my forehead, then lowering it as I bowed out of respect. "Much better, thanks to Kiri." I turned to smile at his daughter, who smiled back. Lo'ak, standing just next to her, waved, a confused look on his face.
"That's good to hear. Join us."
We stepped up, and I took a seat just next to Neteyam, between him and Kiri.
"I'm so glad your mom is doing better," Kiri said. I reached out and touched her shoulder.
"It's thanks to you! You'll have to stop by, she'll want to see you again when she's feeling fully herself."
Kiri smiled. "I will!"
Lo'ak leaned forward. "Y/N, what are you doing here?"
I had to laugh, because it was so like Lo'ak to be blunt. Anyone else saying that would have made me feel awkward and out of place, sitting here with this prominent family, but Lo'ak was just genuinely wondering.
"Neteyam invited me. I haven't seen you much lately, so I had to make new friends."
Lo'ak rolled his eyes. "And of all people, you had to keep it in this family."
I shrugged. "I like this family."
--
Neteyam's father gave a long speech about the prosperity of The People, and Neytiri and Nina sang a beautiful song, and afterwards, the dancing begun.
Before Neteyam could ask Y/N himself, Lo'ak had swept her into the dance floor, leaving Neteyam to stand and watch, his arms crossed and his brow furrowed.
"What's wrong with you?" Kiri asked, trying to follow Neteyam's gaze, but the dance floor was moving too fast.
Then, she saw it. Lo'ak, spinning Y/N around, the both of them laughing and having fun. She'd always wondered if Lo'ak was secretly in love with Y/N, but the more she observed the two, the more she saw it was a poor fit, and neither of them was interested.
What she saw in Neteyam's eyes was very different. He was jealous of Lo'ak.
"You like Y/N," Kiri said.
"Of course I do. You've met her," Neteyam replied matter of factly, and Kiri laughed.
"I have. She's great. Lo'ak thinks so too, but he doesn't like her that way. He would have told her."
Neteyam narrowed his eyes. "It doesn't look that way to me. I didn't even know they were friends."
"How? She's one of his closest friends. You didn't notice?"
“I don’t know,” Neteyam said, reaching behind his head, shrugging at his sister. “It’s like I never saw her before.”
“Well, do you see her now?” Kiri asked, trying but failing to keep the annoyance out of her voice. 
Neteyam’s arm fell to his side, and he sighed. “She’s all I see.”
"Well, just tell her," Kiri replied, and Neteyam snorted.
But... it wasn't a bad idea.
--
Lo'ak and I had been spinning around for far too long, and I was growing tired. We returned to his family, but Neteyam was no longer there.
Lo'ak and I sat down, and he handed me a drink.
"Neteyam invited you to join us?" Lo'ak asked.
"Yeah. He came with Kiri the other day, to visit mom, and he's been like... acting a little funny since."
Lo'ak narrowed his eyes. "Hm." That was the extend of the wisdom he had to offer me, and I wish he was Kiri instead.
"Do you want to dance?"
I whipped my head around to see Neteyam standing over me, extending a hand, and I clambered onto my feet as fast as my lanky limbs would allow, grabbing his hand in the process, allowing him to lead me back into the crowd.
This dance was slower, more traditional, and though Neteyam knew all the steps and fell in sync with everyone else, I was a little unsure, and a little behind, fumbling over my feet. With Lo'ak, I didn't care, because I knew he didn't take it seriously - but Neteyam was so precise and perfect, I didn't want to mess up.
Halfway through the song, we were brought together again, his arm around my waist and mine around his neck. "Let's take a walk," he whispered, and without hesitation, I nodded.
--
Away from the crowd, the night was cool, and the paint we were adorned with glowed in the darkness, along with the forest around us. We walked quietly, our hands still entwined, and finally, Neteyam spoke.
"I must apologize to you, Y/N," he said, stopping us in our tracks. I turned to face him.
"What for?"
"The other day, in your home, you said we had met before, but I... I didn't remember meeting you before."
Though the words weren't a surprise, they stung; it meant I had spent years having a crush on someone who hadn't even noticed me, even though we'd frequently been in close proximity.
"That's okay, Neteyam. I'm just your little brother's friend. I don't know all of No'vu's friends either."
He shook his head. "No, but I should have noticed you, Y/N. I was busy with training, and preparing to lead the clan, and just recently I told my father I want to take a step back from all that. To enjoy life, to form... relationships."
To find a mate, he was saying, without saying it.
"And I think, if I hadn't been so focused, I would have noticed you. I can't believe I didn't before. Something about you..." he trailed off, staring down at me, and I wondered if he could hear my heart wildly beating in my chest, or feel my hand growing cold and clammy inside of his.
"Well, I noticed you," I said finally, as he searched for his next words. "I mean, of course everyone knows who you are... but when I became friends with Lo'ak, I really noticed you."
Finally, Neteyam's nervous face relaxed, slowly replaced by a teasing smile. "Oh yeah? What did you notice?"
"Well, I was only like 14, so at first not much. But then I noticed how handsome you were becoming, how skilled you are with a bow and a spear, how kind you were towards your family and friends... I had a crush on you, when I was 17."
"And now?" he asked, the teasing smile growing even wider still.
"Oh, I still think you're handsome," I replied with a laugh, giving him a playful shove.
"I think you're the most beautiful woman I've ever set eyes on, and the kindest as well, and I'd like to spend every spare moment from now forward getting to know you better," Neteyam said, and I could tell after, he was shocked that he had said it.
"Okay," I replied, unable to hide my smile.
"Okay?"
I nodded. "Let's do that. Spend time together. Get to know one another. I would like that." The joy I felt in that moment was undeniable, and overwhelming. 
--
Neteyam's heart was going to leap out of his chest and onto the forest floor. He had blurted out exactly what he wanted - to spend every moment of every day obsessing over every small detail of her life that she was willing to share - and she had agreed to it.
She had eagerly agreed to it. He knew it was impractical to worship the ground she was walking on after only a few days, but he didn't care.
He was going to make this woman his mate, he knew it. He was going to fall in love with her - it was already happening.
"You are perfection," he said, reaching up to touch her face as he had been dreaming of doing. He ran his fingers along her jaw, over her cheek, down her nose and over her lips, and she closed her eyes, allowing him to. It sent a shiver up his spine.
No amount of time with her would be enough, but he would take anything she would give him.
TAG LIST: @purplepursepaint @lu-the-ghost-reader @loquatious-josephi-krakousky @fanboyluvr @moslaying @moony-artemis @halibanana
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hanichani · 9 months
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Gimme kith
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Pairing: han x gn!reader
Genre: fluff, idol!au, friends to lovers
Summary: the four times hannie has asked for a kiss and the one time you give him what he wants
Warnings: alcohol consumption, sad ji, fluffyyy, lmk if i missed anything
Word count: 1,7k
a/n: i remember seeing this concept written on here before and I wanted to write my take on it because i'm a sucker for ji and f2l hehe
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I.
movie night rarely got wild since the boys were usually pretty tired after a whole week spent working but tonight, here you were, sitting in a circle with an empty soju bottle in the center. you, the boys and some of their significant others were piled in the living room of the 3racha + hyunjin dorm.
you had already drunk some bottles of soju and pretty much everyone in the room was tipsy and happy to have really anything happen. so when the bottle landed on you, and jisung dared you to kiss him, everyone was cheering and clapping. except for you.
don’t get me wrong, you were having the time of your life and you had no problem with kissing jisung but not in this setting. you knew you and jisung were more than friends and everyone around you could see it as well. you were very touchy with each other. told each other everything and when you or jisung were feeling like crumbling down, you always seeked each other’s presence. it meant a lot to you. and whenever he would ask you for kisses (which was a regular occurrence), you would get a whole zoo in your stomach. but you never said yes, never gave him what he asked for, it felt just a bit too official and you weren’t sure what it would do to your relationship.
oh and you sure as hell wouldn’t do it in front a room full of tipsy twenty something year olds. the teasing would never stop. so when you filled another shot glass with soju and poured it down your throat instead of kissing jisung, series of groans and complaints could be heard.
“oh come on! we all know you’re horny for each other. just get it over with!” seungmin exclaimed, throwing his hands around. his significant other, shot him a look and he grumbled under his breath.
“you wound me.” jisung said as he put a hand over his chest.
“oh come on, you already got multiple kisses tonight.” you argued.
it was true, there was a lot of kissing going on tonight due to the alcohol being consumed. and it did sting a little bit but it was a game. a game you couldn’t play if you took things personally.
“yea but they weren’t youuu.” he said in a sing-song tone.
“oh my god, get a room.” hyunjin, who had the most to drink that night and was currently draped over jeongin’s shoulders, whined loudly which caused the younger boy under him to cover his ears.
“oookay, moving on.” the leader spun the bottle again.
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II.
you and han were sitting in the green room, waiting for the boys to go and start their performance. it was a big one and everyone was roaming the room, trying to prepare. you had an airpod in one of your ears but you could still hear jeongin and seungmin warming up with their loud voices. the boy sitting next to you was sporting the other headphone and you were seriously considering asking for it back. primarily because you just wanted to get a moment of piece and quiet with all the loud men in the room but also because han was skipping every song after 20 seconds of it playing.
“ooh, i love this one!” he exclaimed and changed his position on the couch, so his legs were now laying over yours.
“do you really? or are you just going to skip it again.” you rolled your eyes at the boy.
“stop bullying me.” he said and looked around, probably searching for someone he could complain to about you.
“you’re the one bullying me with skipping all the songs.” you exclaimed, slapping his shin lightly.
“OUCH!” he yelled out loudly.
“you are so dramatic, it’s insane.” you said but nevertheless, you still started rubbing the place you previously hit in an attempt to soothe it.
“okay we’re ready to go! come on boys.” a staff member announced to the chaotic idols.
you looked at han who was still pretending to be drowning in pain.
“stop it. it’s go time, squirrel boy.” you shoved his legs off your lap and stuck your hand out for him to give you the other airpod. he huffed and gave you the small device but instead of turning to go, he stopped in front of you. he leaned down so your faces were leveled.
“what?” you stared at him, confused.
“a kiss.” he puckered his lips.
you laughed and pushed his face away.
“come ooon, a good luck kiss.” he whined.
you looked at him, still laughing. you swear you had a tear running down your face from how amusing the boy in front of you was.
“you don’t need that, ji. you’ll do a great job regardless.” you said and patted his cheek.
he frowned. that was obviously not good enough for him but when the same staff member called out for him, visibly annoyed now, he huffed under his breath and shouted a quick.
“i’m coming!”
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III.
jisung was splayed over your bed, the computer in front of him placed dangerously close to his face.
"what are you doing now?” you dropped onto the bed next to him which made him immediately turn the computer away from you.
you groaned, pulling your upper body over his so you could peek at the screen.
“it’s my house too, we created this together.” you placed your chin on his shoulder.
“you wouldn’t approve, you’re a hater.” he said and closed the laptop so you wouldn’t see the screen.
you and han decided to create little versions of yourselves in the sims game because of sheer boredom but now he wouldn’t reveal the changes he was making in your household.
“i’m the hater?” you exclaimed. “you won’t even let me see what you’re doing with my house.” you whined into his ear.
“our house.” he said and brought your hand to his hair. a silent plea for head pats.
you obeyed and started brushing your fingers through his hair.
it was silent after that and when you turned your head to look at him, you could see his eyes closed and relaxed. his lips were puckered in a small pout like they usually were when he got sleepy.
this was the perfect opportunity. your free hand quietly reached for the laptop and opened it.
the profiles of the sims on the screen were both colored in pink and both their statuses read “flirty”. the brightness from the screen made jisung open his eyes and when he saw that you had opened the laptop, he let out a high pitched screech.
“yah! you just tricked me.” he almost yelled.
“ji, why are they flirting. what did you make them do?” amused, you looked at his face that was now scrunched in annoyance.
he groaned before finally giving up. “i made them kiss.”
you let out a loud laugh, your face settling in the crook of his neck.
“you won’t give me kisses in real life!” he whined while pushing you off of him.
“i had to take measures into my own hands.” he said while turning over onto his back and covering his face with his hands.
“you’re such a baby, ji.” you continued laughing while he silently suffered next to you.
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IV.
9.38pm ji: can you come over :(
9:40pm y/nn: why, everything okay?
9:40pm ji: dont know
9:41pm y/nn: okay, omw
9:42pm ji: bring cuddles
9:42pm ji: and kisses :)
9:45pm y/nn: you’re a menace
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V.
when you rang the bell at the dorm that same night, a fluffy looking jisung opened the door. he was wearing an oversized hoodie and he definitely just woke up from a much needed nap because his hair looked like a (fluffy) mess. you entered when he stood aside to let you in.
“everything okay, pretty boy?” you asked as you took your shoes off. you didn’t get a response so you turned to him, to see him looking like he’s on the verge of tears. you went to hug him and he placed his head in the crook of your neck.
“lets go watch anime or something, okay? we can order some food, yea?” you asked as your arms hugged him closer to you. you felt him nod his head.
about an hour later, you were halfway through the third episode of an anime he picked. the empty food containers sat on his desk and jisung was cuddled up to you under the covers. his head was placed on your chest, your arms hugging his body. he looked so small, not physically. he looked like he had all the weight of the world on him and it was crushing him down to this tiny helpless looking boy. you didn’t like seeing him like this.
“ji?” you gave him a head pat.
“hm?” he hummed in response.
“do you wanna talk about it at all?”
he remained still for a few seconds and then he moved his head so it was next to yours. your body followed his, turning to the side. your faces millimeters apart.
“no, don’t think so.” he said, looking at your face as if he was counting any marks or freckles on it.
“okay.” you stayed quiet after that for a bit.
just laying in bed together, looking at each other. it was peaceful. you two communicating just through eye contact.
then you spoke up again. “is there anything i can do then?” you still felt the urge to help him, he was obviously going through something difficult and you didn’t know what else to do.
a small cheeky smile crept up onto his face. “i think a kiss could help.” he whispered.
you rolled your eyes but smiled back nonetheless. and then you leaned forward and gave him a peck.
his eyes instantly widened and he looked like just received the craziest news ever. you had to chuckle at the wide eyed quokka in front of you.
“no way.” he exhaled.
you broke into a laugh, moving to lay on your back.
“shut up, don’t say anything.” you said in between laughs.
he rolled over to his stomach and leaned over you. faces yet again inches apart.
“wasn’t planning on it.” he whispered as he connected your lips again, this time in a much longer and much more loving kiss.
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another a/n: i may or may not have been playing sims 24/7 so that part was definitely not self indulgent!!! other than that, feel free to send me any thoughts or whatever hehe. i would love to interact with other stays!
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yumeka-sxf · 10 days
Text
I try to stay away from negative topics, but after hearing talk on social media yesterday and seeing this post from @such-a-downer, I just had to give my two cents about the complaints regarding yesterday's chapter being "another short mission" and that Endo is somehow being "lazy" or whatever.
I honestly don't understand this mentality of criticizing manga-ka, or any artists really, because they aren't delivering by whatever standards you personally think are appropriate. To me, it just seems like entitlement because Endo has no obligation to cater to any specific fan's wants. This is his story to tell the way he wants, and his characters to develop at the pace he deems fit. This isn't a business contract where we're paying him to deliver content we want every two weeks without fail. If I'm consuming the fruits of someone's creative labor for free, I certainly feel no right to complain if sometimes their content isn't what I wanted or expected. I'm fine with that because 1) I know it's what they (the creator) wanted/needed at the time, and 2) even if a particular chapter wasn't my cup of tea, I know other fellow fans out there somewhere are enjoying the heck out of it, and that's cool!
We also have to remember that SxF is basically a one-man show. If Endo is busy or sick or whatever, it's not like he can have someone fill in for him to write and draw the series. That's what a hiatus is for, that's what making a short chapter instead of a longer one is for...that's how artists should be treated so they don't get burned out and stressed. Plus, art shouldn't be rushed. Any artist knows that there are times when you have trouble coming up with ideas and maybe need a little extra time to develop a more complex section of the story. To immediately jump to conclusions that he's lazy or doesn't know what he's doing is ridiculous. Maybe he didn't feel good for a few days, maybe he's been busy with other SxF events, maybe he just needed more time to get a particular future arc developed, or maybe he just has basic IRL obligations to take care of like we all do...you don't know what's going on in his life, so don't make assumptions.
Another thing to keep in mind is that it's literally impossible to please every fan. One of the comments I read for example, someone was ready to drop the series because we haven't seen much of Yor in "a while." All I could think of was "didn't she just have a pretty big role only four chapters ago when they went to the ski resort?" Plus she was the star of chapter 91, which was less than ten chapters ago. So according to this person's standards, four chapters without seeing a particular character is "too long"? What if it was only three chapters, would that be acceptable? It's not right to push our own personal standards of a series' pacing as the "correct" way: some people want to see more of character X while someone else wants to see more of subplot Y, so should both complain that the manga-ka isn't doing right whenever they focus on something else? I'm not saying you shouldn't make criticisms of a manga-ka's work, but the criticisms should come from within the narrative itself, not superficial things like chapters focusing on subplots/characters you don't want to see or not having enough "plot-advancing" content when it's not a plot-focused series.
People who have read SxF up to this point should know the general flow of the chapters: mostly slice-of-life episodic, with more plot-heavy, intense arcs once in a while, like the cruise arc and bus arc. It's an ensemble series that spends most of its chapters focused on at least one of the Forgers, but occasionally other characters here and there. That's how the series has been for years and will likely continue to be. So if you keep complaining because you only like the dramatic story arcs and not the "nothing happens" episodic chapters, then maybe the series just isn't for you. It's totally fine if that's the case, but don't act like Endo is doing something wrong because he's not providing the particular thing you want in his story.
To summarize, Endo has no obligation to cater to particular fans' standards, just as we have no obligation to keep reading his work if we don't like it. But being a fan to me means respecting the creator's pace and vision even if it's not always what I personally want. I can find something to enjoy in every chapter because I'm a fan of SxF, not a fan of one particular aspect of it. But I also will not complain every time my tastes aren't being catered to and will simply occupy myself with other things while I wait. What's the big hurry, after all? I'm in no rush for SxF to wrap up its plot and I'm glad Endo isn't rushing either.
And that's all I'm gonna say about this topic, lol. On a happier note, I'm going to finally see Code White on Thursday! 😁 More to come later~
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hanniluvi · 9 months
Text
ᶻ 𝗓 𐰁 — TEN THINGS I HATE ; JAY FIC
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“ I’ll do better, if you stay with me like this. ”
.𖥔 ݁ ˖ where jay keeps a journal where he documents all the reasons he hates you, his rival. despite claiming he will forever hate you, keeping this journal only makes him realize his feelings for you.
PAIRING rival!jay x gn!reader
GENRE angst, fluff — WARNINGS jealousy ; overthinking !
WORD COUNT 1.7K+ (1730)
.𖥔 ݁ ˖ soph strikes again!! angst cb, did we cheer?? anyways i was in the feels okay 😢 listening to music while writing really unlocks something in ur brain im telling you…idk what really went thru my mind when making this but enjoy 😊🫶
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#1 – HOW YOU’RE GOOD AT EVERYTHING.
Is it normal to have a journal dedicated to someone you hate? Whatever, I just need to get this off my chest. Whenever you’re involved, it’s like I could have nothing I want. It’s stupid, but I don’t care, it just pisses me off when you easily follow instructions, perfect things on your first try, and get all the awards I wish to have. I admit, jealousy consumes me. It's frustrating how effortlessly you seem to achieve anything you want without even trying. Seeing your achievements plastered all over the school only intensifies my anger, making me wish I could tear your posters into shreds. I've never despised second place more than now. Why can't I find contentment with my own scores or position, just like you? How can I remove you from my life and find peace within myself?
#2 – HOW CHEERFUL YOU ARE.
How is it possible for someone to remain so happy throughout the entire day? I can't help but wonder if you possess some magical influence over my friends, as they seem to shower you with compliments non-stop. It's weird to hear nothing but praise for you while I find myself complaining about various things. It's almost as if nobody comprehends why I harbor such animosity towards you, and this frustrates me immensely. Every time I express my emotions, they tell me to laugh and smile more, as if I don't already do it enough. But then, when I contemplate your cheerful and positive demeanor, it becomes clear why they encourage it. You're like the epitome of a model student everyone aspires to be, while I remain the perpetually angry and stubborn person. No wonder everyone wants to spend time with you, and perhaps that's one thing I can agree with others on.
#3 – YOU LIKE THINGS THAT I LIKE.
It's almost like a curse that we share the same interests. It's the reason I keep encountering you everywhere. Whatever I do, you seem to be there, expressing your fondness for the same things with your friends. It's frustrating, and I can't help but roll my eyes at the thought of encountering you even more. Even listening to music has become a challenge, as I know you like the same artists. I purposely skip their songs because they only remind me of you, and I hate being consumed by thoughts of you. I yearn to stop learning more about you so that I can enjoy the things I like in peace, without these constant reminders of you.
#4 – YOU MAKE ME OVERTHINK.
Maybe because of how perfect you seem to be in other’s eyes, I wonder how I look in other people’s eyes too. Am I that awful to hang out with? Am I always seen as this angry person who hates everyone? I’m not that, I know that–my friends do as well. But others? I’m not so sure about that. What confuses me even more is why you persist in wanting to spend time with me despite any perceived flaws or stubbornness on my part. You could easily choose to be with other people who might seem better to converse with. Yet, you continue to stick around, refusing to give up on our “friendship”. And because of this, I can see how others might form a negative opinion about me. My constant push to keep you away could be misunderstood, leading people to believe I'm simply a horrible person.
#5 – YOU LIKE ME.
I'm not sure if you have romantic feelings for me, but I can tell that you consider me a friend. It's interesting because I hadn't thought of you in that way before, but it doesn't seem to bother you. Today, you stood up for me, and it felt really heartening. Normally, I might have felt angry or vulnerable when someone defends me, but this time it was different. I don’t know, it just did feel really nice. Your quick response in telling those people to stop was captivating, even though I didn't express my gratitude at the moment. Lately, I've been struggling with the loud voices in my head, and sometimes I wonder if you could help quiet them too. But now, I'm not sure what I'm trying to convey. You confuse me a lot.
#6 – YOU GIVE THE WRONG PEOPLE SECOND CHANCES.
The other day, I saw you in tears because someone had broken your heart. I must admit, I was taken aback because I had never seen you sad or upset before. It was quite a contrast to the cheerful version of yourself that I'm familiar with. What happened to you that everyone sees all the time? I hope you had someone to tell you your problems too, as it’s not easy for someone who is your rival to be comforting you. I didn’t, so I hope you went home that night filled with less worries because you have someone to talk with.
What surprised me even more was that the very next day, you gave the person who hurt you a second chance. I can't help but wonder why you keep allowing people to hurt you when it's likely they'll repeat the same behavior, ultimately affecting your radiant smile. Stop going back to the people that hurt you once, it’s only going to be a cycle. I wish I could share these thoughts with you, but I hesitate because I doubt you'd take them to heart coming from someone like me. However, I can't help caring despite my own imperfections. It's puzzling to me as well, as you make me feel oddly connected to your feelings.
#7 – SEEING YOUR TEARS.
I never imagined how much I could despise seeing someone cry until the moment I witnessed your tears. Ever since that day, I always thought about it, so how could I let it slip out of my mind this time? I’m sorry for yelling at you today. I’m sorry for saying I hate you. I didn’t mean it, I was just extremely frustrated today, and not at you. I’m sorry. I’m sorry. I’m sorry. I know how saying this won’t do anything, but I truly mean it. I wish I could rewind time once I saw water fill up in your eyes, but what’s done is done. You made me realize something crucial—that I've always seen you as a rival, whereas you only wanted to be friends with me. I allowed my competitive nature to ruin our chances of a meaningful connection. I fear now that you might avoid me, and I understand if you do. I worry that I might continue to hurt you, just like the people you often encounter, who don't treat you with the kindness you deserve. You deserve better than that, and I'm sorry for contributing to your pain.
#8 – GIVING ME ANOTHER CHANCE.
I never imagined we'd get another chance after what happened. I tried avoiding you, genuinely attempting to keep my distance. But no matter how hard I tried, I couldn't resist reaching out to talk to you again. It's almost as if we both sensed the need to address the situation, leading us to have that important conversation. I still don’t know why you gave me another chance. Did I not say hurtful things to you? How easily are you able to put that behind? Your ability to forgive and move past it leaves me in awe.
It's making me reflect on my own flaws, especially how I tend to hold grudges and struggle to let go of negative feelings. I can't quite comprehend how you do it, but you make me think about you more than ever before. Every word I speak now feels like it needs to be carefully considered, thanks to your presence in my thoughts. Your gesture of offering another chance touched me deeply and brought a smile to my face. I can't help but wonder what you've done to influence me in this way. I think you really did something to me.
#9 – FEELINGS, FEELINGS, FEELINGS.
We've connected much faster than I anticipated, even surprising my friends. I'm left wondering what you've done to me. You've become an all-encompassing thought – your smile, your laughter, your sense of humor – everything about you fills my mind. At times, I ponder whether I ever cross your thoughts too. Could this be love? My friends have mentioned it, and I can't find a way to refute them. I'm fond of you, immensely so. Isn't that a crazy twist?
It's a strange journey we're on. I started this journal to document the reasons I disliked you, but look at where it's led us. Is it too soon to be feeling this way? The idea of revealing my feelings is terrifying, yet I'm unsure if I'll ever have another opportunity. Please bear with me, allow me to find the right moment. Perhaps soon, hopefully, you'll be in my arms. I realize how absurd all this sounds – what am I even saying?
#10 – HOW EASY YOU WON ME OVER.
You won. You won my heart effortlessly, but I didn't win yours in return. I'm burdened with regret for how I've treated you. My ignorance and neglect weigh heavily on me now. It's painfully clear that he's all you've ever been able to think about. Why did I delude myself into thinking I could make a difference? If only I had treated you with the kindness you deserved from the start. Could that have made you love me instead? These thoughts haunt me.
I've grown aware of my own attachment, and I'm sorry for allowing it to consume me. I apologize for the disruption I've caused in your recent weeks. I can't bring myself to be genuinely happy for you and him, though he does seem like a better man than I could ever be. It's evident that I need to move on for your sake, to make things easier for you. Yet, there's a part of me that wishes I could still claim you as mine. That longing will always remain unchanged.
I doubt you'll ever stumble upon this journal entry, not that I would ever permit anyone to. But regardless, I want you to know that I do love you. It's a truth that's etched deeply within me, even though it pains me to admit it.
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💭 — fun fact this was supposed to have a happy ending until i pulled out spotify n listened to lyn lapid…yeah.
ENHA PERM TAGLIST (🎥) — @flwoie @ixomiyu @yenavrse @shinsou-rii @bearseulgs @ilovewonyo @yenqa @dimplewonie @bubblytaetae @wtfhyuck @ineedaherosavemeenow @starcubes @starikizs @wonioml @chirokookie @xiaoderrrr @neozon3nha @en-chantedtomeetyou @millksea @enhaz1 @eundiarys @woon2u @ja4hyvn @judeduartewannabe @j-wyoung @thia-aep @vampcharxter @softpia @officiallyjaehyuns @itsactuallylina @hsheart @sweetjaemss @ahnneyong @hanienie @jwnghyuns @kpoplover718 @jiawji @rikizm @haknom @yeokii @wvnkoi @whoschr @teddywonss @shinunoga-iie-wa @flwrshee @skzenhalove @misokei @s00buwu @ox1-lovesick @miercerise @litttlestars @enhapocketz
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aris-ink · 9 months
Note
OMGGGGGGG I NEED PT 2 PLS 🙏🏼 ID DO ANYTHING TO SEE WHAT HAPPENS AFTER THE PARENTS GO TO DINNER RESERVATIONS 😏 ily 💜
ily more 😚
pairing: jungkook x reader
genre: forbidden romance, step!siblings au
warnings: mentions of manipulation, pseudo incest, mentions of ridiculous porn tropes 🤷‍♀️, jk is nasty I'm sorry 💀, daddy kink, degradation, praise, dirty talk, creampie
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This wasn't exactly how Jungkook had planned to spend the evening, but why waste such a precious opportunity thrown his way? The moment the lock turned, he made his way to the living room; ready to grab you, throw you over his shoulder and take you to bed. However, he found himself frozen in the doorway, throat dry and heart skipping a beat.
His footsteps were slow, quiet enough not to catch your attention. He knelt down on the carpet right behind you, the heat of his hands on your waist making you jump.
"Jungkook!" you breathed, voice coming out muffled. "Don't do that."
He hummed, rubbing your sides softly in an attempt to apologize.
"Sorry, baby. Did you lose something?"
He could hear you sigh, his eyes tracing the curve of your spine.
"My-" a hitch of breath interrupted your reply.
Like a cute, little kitten, you stiffened up, hairs rising on your arms when you felt his hand sneak under your skirt. Waiting. Assessing the threat. Jungkook smirked, spreading his fingers over your asscheek to grope it lewdly.
"-earrings," you moaned, "Jungkook-"
His dick, already hard and twitching in his jeans, pressed into your panty clad core.
"Yes, baby?" He rubbed your ass, the smooth, familiar motions both soothing and electrifying. "You're not stuck there, are you?"
You could feel a flush spreading through your neck, eyes darting around the dark space. It was impossible to push yourself up and get out from under the couch as long as he was blocking your way, his hips firm as a wall against you.
"No," you swallowed, "if you just move and let me-"
Riiip.
You gasped, cold air immediately hitting your exposed heat. You didn't need to look; you felt his eyes on you, the weight of his gaze touching vulnerable places it never should have seen. Your heart raced beneath your ribs. You knew you were alone in the house, but this was...
Your train of thought disappeared, nothing but a ghost ship in the brief fog of common sense. It was a dark, clear night again, stars floating all around you when you felt his fingertips come into direct contact with your hole to spread it open. He could see the way the muscles clenched around nothing, desperate to be stuffed.
"Jungkook... " You managed nervously, a flicker of sails in the wind.
"Come on," he murmured, entranced by the pretty sight, the slick flowing out, making your cunt glisten. The hand on your asscheek tightened its grip on it, massaging the flesh. "I've always wanted to try this. Please, baby, please?"
You whined, half in stubborn disbelief, half lost in the burning heat already building up in your abdomen, consuming you from the inside like fire.
"You're such a pervert."
Jungkook didn't dare take his eyes off you, watching your cunt contract, releasing more slick, wetting the tips of his fingers.
"Yeah?" He asked raspily, running his tongue along his piercing. "I don't see your pussy complaining."
You said nothing, inhaling shakily. Words just wouldn't come. Jungkook's hand slid off your ass, palming the erection straining against his zipper, though it brought him little relief. He started unzipping his fly instead, and you wondered if he was really going to do this; reenact some ridiculous porn he watched while he fantasized about you, way before any of this began. After yesterday, it shouldn't really be surprising. But your nerves were still frayed, the position unfamiliar, leaving you more vulnerable, making your cunt throb harder. It seemed like the moment Jungkook finally got you, all he wanted was to spend the rest of his life reminding you that you were his, body and soul.
He let out a deep sigh the moment his cock finally sprang free from its confines.
"What's it gonna be, baby?" He asked, leaning over you. He pressed a kiss into your back, and the leaking tip of his shaft into your cunt. "Do you want me to fuck you or not?"
You felt a shiver run down your spine, despite of the heat of his chest against it. Your body spoke his language, even if your mouth couldn't, soaking his fat cock more at the first bump against your clit. You couldn't hold back the moan that slipped past your lips, leaving them open. A shaky exhale fled Jungkook in return, warming your spine and your tummy further.
"I need words, sweetheart."
You tried to focus, fingers digging into the soft carpet.
"Please," you whispered.
Jungkook shut his eyes, aiming the head of his stiff cock at your small hole. He pressed into it slowly, feeling and hearing it stretch as he pushed forward, pulsing around him.
"Please what?"
He rocked in and out of you, sinking in deeper with each thrust forward, biting into his lip to stay quiet. You whined from under the couch, eyes already rolling back.
"Please, daddy."
Jungkook bottomed out with a shudder, hands grasping your hips and back straightening so he could start thrusting into you steadily. He tried to stifle a groan, eyes fighting to stay open, like he was drunk. Drunk on the way you felt, on the way you moaned from underneath the couch. On how dirty it was, how he couldn't even see your face, like he was using a fleshlight rather than fucking you. The thrill that it sent through him was even dirtier.
"Good girl," he praised breathily, slowing for a moment.
He pulled almost all the way out, then, carefully, proceeded to hump you with just the drooling tip of his dick. You whimpered, hips jerking when he suddenly pressed a finger into your clit, rubbing it in lazy circles.
"That's it, baby," he whispered, "cream my cock. I know how much you like it."
He felt your pussy tighten, felt it drip around him. Usually, Jungkook didn't have as much freedom as he wanted to be with you, to touch you. To see how many times you could come, in how many ways; to make you cry. And what was stopping him tonight?
He frowned, tongue poking out in concentration, a drop of sweat rolling down his temple. His balls clenched, and so did his jaw, a low moan flowing out.
"Fucck. Such a good, pretty slut, all fucking mine. Yeah."
Of course he knew you were going to come; he could tell, and of course he's been waiting, holding back, all for this moment. Just to dig his fingers into your hips, shove the rest of his cock into your poor, unsuspecting cunt and blow his load, groaning and bringing new galaxies to life behind your eyes. He remained still, twitching as you spasmed around him, sweet, little sounds leaving your mouth.
One hand grabbing onto the couch, he collapsed forward, feeling his own cum trickling down from where you were connected, like your little hole couldn't hold all of it, even with his cock still buried deep inside you.
His other hand slid down your thigh.
"Are you okay?"
Your mewl made him chuckle, urged him to gently disconnect himself from you and help you out from under the couch. He kissed and rubbed your knees and elbows, sore from being pressed into the floor, for once no longer a slave to the incessant ticking of the clock. No one else was going to be home tonight. At all. Your parents were unfortunately stuck dealing with a flat tire, somewhere in the middle of nowhere.
They just didn't know it yet, and neither did you. But life was just so unpredictable, wasn't it?
💌 taglist: @baalsgurl1913 @kooktrash @era-genius @sweetempathprunetree @bucketofhiros @iceprincessviviane @silv3rswirls @httpsbts @osakis-gf @chimmisbae
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ohbo-ohno · 5 months
Note
I would trade my firstborn child for a part two of kingpin price. It’s consumed my thoughts. I have so many what ifs in my mind.
alright listen. i don't take requests. i don't write part 2's just because someone asked. i DON'T and i WONT START okay this is a ONE TIME THING it will NOT happen again!!! please do not start spamming me asking for more!! i won't do it! it actively discourages me!!! i don't do requests!!!!!!!!!! PLEASE
anyways. here's the 1.4k part two of the kingpin price x reader thing. (cw for... being forced to move in with a mob boss? and unplanned pregnancy. no smut!)
"Be careful!" You hiss at the brute dropping a box with PICTURES scrawled across the side. "Are you trying to break my things?!"
The man ignores you, heading back out to the moving truck with the other workers. You huff, just barely stopping yourself from stomping your foot, quickly kneeling to make sure nothing's broken. Luckily for them, it's all perfectly intact, wrapped safely and securely in bubble wrap.
You're not fully mollified, still scowling as you stand and move to one of the tall windows to watch them work.
"Keeping the men in line?" John asks from the doorway, a glass of water in his hand. You scowl as he steps forward, offering it to you, but still take it and sip from the straw.
"Can they not read?" You complain, feeling more than a little bitch-y with your entire life being turned on it's head in front of you. "If anything is even cracked when I unpack, there'll be hell to pay."
John chuckles, stepping up beside you as the men bring another round of boxes in. "I'm sure, love. You're very scary."
You glare at him, entirely unamused by his sarcasm, but his smile only grows.
It doesn't take long for the movers to get all your boxes settled, and John dismisses them before they can start trying to unpack for you, leaving you surrounded by what bits of your life you'd chosen to take with you.
You'd been stressed beyond belief when John took you to your apartment to chose what got packed, flitting between various movers and trying your best to make sure they were doing everything the exact way you thought it needed to be done. John had trailed behind you, seemingly perfectly content to let you worry and only intervening when you started trying to do the movers' jobs for them.
"Now, now, love," he'd rumbled, laughing and guiding you away with a hand on your elbow. "Let's let the men do what I'm paying them for, hm? Why don't we find you something else to do."
You'd bristled at the condescending words, had redirected all of your annoyance and bitchiness back to him - where it belonged, really - and only realized hours later that that was probably his intent all along. You can only hope he regretted it after several minutes of your very targeted complaining.
You bite back the urge now, just a bit more nervous in his house than you had been in your apartment. Even with all the strangers packing up your things, there had been a sense of familiarity that distracted you from just who you've gotten yourself entangled with. But in John's house, with everything decorated in a painfully masculine way and his cologne filling the air, you really can't forget who you're with.
It makes you just nervous enough to bite your tongue now, uncomfortable in his territory. So you don't complain when he tugs you away from the boxes, guiding you further down a hallway, even if your heart does race.
He leads you to what is clearly his bedroom, the bed made perfectly but the various signs of life on his dresser and his nightstand giving him away. You clear your throat before speaking, taking another sip of the water and staying by the door even as he begins to putter around. "Where can I sleep? If you don't have a guest room, I don't mind the couch."
He shoots you a look, like you've said something silly, and huffs when you don't continue.
"The woman carrying my child doesn't sleep on a couch," he almost sneers the words. "You'll sleep in here."
You lick your lips, shifting on your feet. "And where will you sleep?"
His look turns shifts to something almost teasing, like he's just humoring you. "I'll sleep in my bed, just like you. Too tall for the couches, I'm afraid."
It's hard to keep your face neutral, but you think you manage. "You can't stay in a guest room?"
He turns back to whatever he was doing at his dresser before, shaking his head with a smile. "You don't need to worry, love. I won't touch you until you beg, you're perfectly safe in bed with me."
Your face flames, cheeks hot with embarrassment. "What- why would you even-? No, that's not what I was worried about." It definitely was, but he doesn't need to know that. "And I'll never beg for you to touch me."
He turns, leaning against his dresser and crossing his arms, one ankle crossed over the other, the picture of comfort. He looks at you like you're amusing, like you've said something you believe that is fully true but are obviously wrong.
"We'll see," he hums, head tilting. "Regardless, anything that happens between us will be on your terms. Until then, we'll just be bedmates."
The heat doesn't leave your face. "Do you really not have a guest room to stay in?"
"I don't see why I should have to. We're both adults, and while I know I won't maul you in the middle of the night, I wouldn't mind if you initiated something. Doesn't seem like much anything can go wrong."
You're... not sure how to argue that. It seems almost juvenile, somehow, to complain about sharing a bed with the man who took your virginity and got you pregnant on the first try, but there's still a part of you that doesn't feel safe enough around John to fall asleep in the same bed as him (at least while sober). And while he couldn't seem less threatening at the moment, you refuse to let yourself forget that he's a violent criminal.
You shift from foot to foot, eyes trained on his throat to avoid eye contact. "...Fine."
"Good." He ducks his head just enough to make you lock eyes, his smile soft. "Glad we got that settled. Now, how would you like a bath?"
You eye him, then the bathtub you can see through the open door to the ensuite. It's massive, could probably easily fit four people in it, and it's hard not to feel tempted.
But... you're not sure you want to strip down in front of him.
You take a deep breath, and figure that you'll have to bathe at some point anyway. John's made it more than clear that you're not leaving any time soon, and while you already plan to get as much freedom as you can, you're under no delusion for how much control you really have in this situation.
"Alright," you agree. "Alone, though."
He holds a hand over his heart, standing and holding his other arm out towards the bathroom. "Of course, what do you take me for?"
You side eye him as you walk to the bathroom, keeping him in your line of sight for as long as possible.
"A criminal and a man with no sense of personal boundaries," you mutter on your way past, just long enough for him to hear. He laughs, but doesn't stop you from shutting the bathroom door in his face.
You lock the door behind you, already feeling more relaxed. He's surely got a key, and you know a flimsy lock won't keep John Price out if he really wants in, but the layer of security is still a comfort.
You don't bother to look around the bathroom too much, far too eager to slip into the tub and float in warm water. It doesn't take long to fill, the multiple jets on the side of the tub warming quickly.
As you sink into the clean water, you daydream about all the decorating you'll do in John's house. It's a beautiful home, and if he's going to make you live with him for the foreseeable future, the least he can do is let you make it even marginally more appealing.
You smirk a bit, wondering if maybe you can even finagle his credit card. He certainly owes you, and you've got no problem spending his money on yourself and your baby. It's the least he can do, after all.
The water leaves your limbs loose, the steam soothing in your throat and lungs, and you can't help but feel that you might've been overreacting earlier, and that everything is going to be just fine.
When the sound of the door unlocking breaks the silence in the bathroom, you jolt forward. You wrap one arm around your chest to cover yourself just as the door opens, a shirtless John stepping inside.
You stare at him with wide eyes, gaping, and his lips curve into a smile beneath his facial hair.
"Would you mind some company, love?"
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I Knew Your Were Trouble When You Walked In 3
Warnings: non/dubcon, medical procedures including dialysis and chronic illness, and other dark elements. My username actually says you never asked for any of this.
Characters: Pete Brenner, short!reader
My warnings are not exhaustive but be aware this is a dark fic and may include potentially triggering topics. Please use your common sense when consuming content. I am not responsible for your decisions.
As usual, I would appreciate any and all feedback. I’m happy to once more go on this adventure with all of you! Thank you in advance for your comments and for reblogging.
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The clanging is enough to drive you crazy. You snap shut your laptop and let out a huff. A day where you can just stay home and get your work done and the landlord is doing maintenance. It has to be that day.
You check the time and rub your eyes. You look down at your pajama pants mournfully. You’re going to have to wear real clothes. You change into a pair of cords and a gray button up. You pack up your bag and shrug on a jacket as you step into your shoes.
You jingle out with your keys, locking the door behind you before quickly fleeing the echoing metalling thrums. You take the stairs down and tuck your chin down against the crisp autumn air. A tea will help with that, maybe something with a kick of caffeine to wake you up.
The cafe is only a block away. You order some ginger tea and take it to a table in the corner. You set up and hunker down to get through the last of your emails. You cup your chin as you lean your elbow on the table, entranced by the screen.
The rush of the cafe is almost soothing. The white noise helps you get through the overstuffed email sent by your supervisor. Check, check, got that done. You sip your tea as it cools and sit up to type your reply.
“You can have coffee?” The voice interrupts your frantic typing. You look up with brows furrowed. How on earth? “Genuinely curious,” Pete sits across from you, setting his paper cup down on the other end of the table, “with dialysis and everything.”
You blink at him and refocus on your laptop. You don’t want to know how he found you. Whether it’s cruel fate or something more sinister, you have more important things going on.
“You pack a real blow, you know that? I had a bruise and everything,” he complains, “not very nice and I’ll say I’ve been really nice to you.”
You continue to ignore him as you resume your response to Caroline. In hindsight, you would rather sit through the clanking of wrenches and pipes. You swallow your agitation, tuning out the silhouette just on the other side of your screen.
Suddenly, your laptop crushes your hands and your eyes pop up. Pete’s hand lingers on the cover as you snatch your fingers out from under it. You tilt your head in frustration.
“You look like a sweet girl,” he says, “but you’re not, are you?”
“Excuse me?” You hiss.
“Ah, come on, loosen up," he winks.
You shake your head and contemplate your options. You could pack up and go but you risk leading him back to your building. Telling him to go away isn't going to do too much and ignoring him only seems to encourage him.
"You like sweets? They got a great chocolate croissant."
"I'm not hungry," you insist and go back to typing. "I'm busy."
"Lonely too, by the looks of it," he leans forward, "let me buy you something, sweetheart."
Your eyes flick up and you give him a glare. You don't understand this man and he surely doesn't understand you. You're less than interested in any guy but especially not him. Your life has order and you value that. What little you can control, you hold close.
"You don't just come down to the cafe looking like you do and not want attention," he pushes on your laptop again and you stop it from closing. "I mean… how many dudes are gonna hit on a sick girl anyway? I accept you, babe, kidneys and all–"
"That's it," you snap, "get away from me. Now."
"Hey, it's a compliment–"
"Leave. Me. Alone."
"It's fine, we can move past this, I like a little fire–"
You flutter your lashes at him as your chest burns. You want to scream and cry at the same time. You look around, reminding yourself of your audience and take a deep breath.
"I'm asking you nicely…" your voice cracks, betraying you, "to go."
"I didn't do anything wrong–"
"There a problem here?" A deep growl has you shrinking further as Pete turns in his chair to look defiantly up at the man in the black apron.
"No problem. None of your business, bus boy."
The man with the black apron crosses his arms and scoffs, "big problem. I own this place so if you don't leave in the next fifteen seconds, I'll have you trespassed."
"Whatever, bro, me and the lady are having a chat–"
"He bothering you?" The man in the apron asks. You nod, breathless. "On your feet before I throw you on your ass," he growls at Pete.
"Like to see you try," Pete stands and puffs out his chest, "you're getting a one-star, bud." He crushes his cup into the man's apron, spilling the coffee down it, "coffee tastes like dirt anyway."
"Have a good day," the owner sneers, staring until Pete finally retreats, not without sending you a lecherous leer.
You watch after him and swallow, "I'm sorry–"
"You okay?" The man holds the dripping cup, foam on his name tag that reads 'Curtis'.
"Yeah, thanks," you murmur, "I didn't mean to make a scene."
"No worries, you need anything, just ask for Curt," he gives a curt bow and backs away, leaving your to wallow in a stormy rush of nerves.
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bbobpul · 9 months
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break my heart again — njm
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PAIRING. na jaemin x female reader SUMMARY. y/n has a crush on jaemin so she decided to dedicate her entire college life to him. GENRE. angst, fluff W/C. 3.5k NOTE. hi, i'm back with a jaemin au. please comment your thoughts and reblog (IF U WANT TO OKIE?) enjoy reading, babes.
╰⁠(⁠ ⁠・⁠ ⁠ᗜ⁠ ⁠・⁠ ⁠)⁠➝ my other works !!!!! part two
i find it hard to picture myself ever being as dedicated to something or someone again, just like how i dedicated my entire college life to na jaemin.
lately, i've been feeling like i forgot what it's like to actually have a dream. back then, na jaemin was my dream, he was my driving force. i would force myself to wake up so early in the morning just so i could see him (or his car) enter the gates of the university. i would go to school even though i am sick and feel a lot better when i get home because i saw na jaemin. but now two years after graduating, i still haven't found a decent job that i actually enjoy.
it's a common experience that many people go through, and i suppose i shouldn't complain about it. maybe i need to put in more effort and push myself harder. part of me wonders if having na jaemin back in my life would rekindle that same sense of dedication that i once had. but as i say these thoughts out loud, they sound absurd, even to myself. why would i wish for my first love to return just so i could find a decent job? why would i long for na jaemin to come back merely to feel that spark in my life again? it's puzzling why i'm even dwelling on thoughts of him and wondering if he holds the key to my happiness and success.
it feels like a constant struggle between my heart and my mind. i love na jaemin and i always will but a lot of things happened and a lot of things have changed.
na jaemin has caused significant damage to both.
first year, in third person's pov
"hi, jaemin from the architecture building! you look reaaaally cool ! have this cookie.
ps. i am a really good baker"
jaemin read the note with a bewildered gaze and furrowed brows. as she moved away from him and gradually disappeared into the distance, he observed her. she had given him something before this week, not for the first time. the start of college had only been two weeks, and in that brief time, y/n had been continuously giving jaemin presents. whether it was food, pencils, or a handkerchief, it was usually the delectable stuff she baked herself.
on the other hand, y/n ran to the lecture room with the big window as soon as she left jaemin's building. she was at the ideal spot to see everything, including jaemin, the person who held her heart and was also her first love.
because she saw her crush and gave him another gift, which he gratefully accepted, she was grinning widely, an 18-year-old young woman having a good day.
however, she isn't entirely certain of that. y/n never saw jaemin use or consume any of the things she handed him. she never did a second check. she is not creepy in that way. but she's not really that foolish. y/n has doubts about jaemin's ability to keep what she provides him. she is therefore gazing at him from behind the window.
cold and silence filled the empty lecture hall. warmth filled y/n, and she could feel her heart thumping loudly inside her chest.
jaemin stood there for a moment, clutching y/n's note in his hand. however, instead of keeping it or cherishing the gesture, he proceeded to walk towards the gardens beside his building, making his way towards the trash can and threw the note away. this unexpected action left y/n feeling puzzled and somewhat disheartened.
after discarding the note in the trash can, jaemin made his way back to his building. y/n's attention shifted as she observed a group of people approaching jaemin, engaging in a lively conversation with him. seeing him happily interacting with his friends brought a smile to her face, knowing that he was surrounded by good company.
however, her confusion resurfaced when she noticed jaemin handing the paper bag she had given him to one of the girls in the group. it left her wondering why he didn't keep the gift for himself and why he chose to give it to someone else instead.
'oh,' y/n thought to herself, 'at least he didn't waste the food i gave him.' despite her disappointment, she found solace in knowing that her gift, the one she had carefully prepared, wasn't entirely disregarded.
as she silently observed the scene, her heart raced with an intensity that almost drowned out all other sounds. the thumping in her chest echoed so loudly that she failed to notice the time. caught in the moment, she couldn't tear her eyes away as jaemin entered the lecture room in his building.
her mesmerizing watchfulness caused her to lose track of time, and before she knew it, she was late for her next subject. but despite the consequences, she couldn't help but linger a little longer, hoping to catch another glimpse of jaemin, the person who had unknowingly become the center of her world.
after what happened, y/n never stopped. she is the textbook definition of complete commitment. as long as na jaemin knows her, there is something in her that believes that na jaemin will learn how to love her.
second year
once again, life has taken many twists and turns, bringing about significant changes.
amidst it all, y/n's unwavering commitment and dedication to na jaemin remained steadfast, even growing stronger over time.
when she learned from his friends that he often skipped breakfast, relying solely on coffee, y/n's concern for his well-being took center stage. without a second thought, she began preparing packed lunches for jaemin, determined to ensure he didn't go through his days on an empty stomach.
this act of caring displayed the depth of her feelings and the lengths she was willing to go to look out for him.
on the other hand, na jaemin continued with his usual routine. upon receiving y/n's notes, he would read them briefly before tossing them away, seemingly unaffected by their contents. similarly, he would pass on the items she gifted him to any of his friends without much thought or consideration. it became evident that jaemin's actions were a stark contrast to y/n's heartfelt gestures, leaving her to wonder why her expressions of care and affection didn't seem to have a significant impact on him.
y/n is well aware of the reality of the situation, and she's not naive. however, a part of her still clings to the same belief she had back in her first year. deep down, she holds onto the hope that as long as na jaemin knows her, there's a chance he might eventually learn how to love her in return. despite the challenges and past disappointments, this glimmer of optimism persists within her heart, keeping her hopeful for a future that may yet unfold.
third year
"hey, jaemin," y/n had been practicing those two words for what felt like an eternity, or maybe three years. this would be the first time she'd initiate a conversation with him this year. in the past, they hadn't exchanged many words, and this might be the longest interaction they've had.
"i have a friend who's studying the same course as you, and he's very sick right now. i was wondering if i could borrow your notes for him?" she asked, putting on a friendly smile.
"who's your friend?" jaemin inquired after a few moments of silence.
"renjun. i'm sure you know him. he's a pretty outstanding student," y/n replied, maintaining her smile.
"uh, yeah. i don't have any notes right now since i'm headed somewhere, but i'll give them to you later," he said, scratching his head.
"can i get your insta?" jaemin suddenly asked, catching y/n off guard and making her flustered.
"h-huh?" y/n stammered, puzzled by his request.
"so i can contact you and give you the notes," jaemin explained.
"oh!" y/n exclaimed, finally understanding his intention.
jaemin handed his phone to y/n, and she quickly typed in her username. he then called her there to verify if it was correct, and when her phone rang, jaemin started to walk away, seemingly content with the exchange.
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"i really thought it would be you," y/n murmured to herself, her disappointment evident.
despite feeling let down, y/n gathered her emotions and began walking towards the library, which lay three buildings away from her current location. as she strolled, her mind was preoccupied with thoughts about who gigi might be. y/n had a close circle of friends among jaemin's acquaintances, yet no one had ever mentioned anyone named gigi. this led her to ponder whether gigi was someone special to jaemin or simply a random person in their department that he asked to deliver the notes.
a smile tugged at the corners of her lips at the idea that jaemin would go to great lengths just to ensure she received the notes, even disturbing someone from his own class to pass them on when he couldn't do it himself.
but y/n soon chided herself for entertaining such thoughts, recognizing that she might be crossing into a realm of delusion. still, in the midst of her contemplations, there remained a glimmer of hope that maybe, just maybe, jaemin's actions held a deeper significance.
y/n settled down on one of the bean bags near the entrance of the library, strategically positioning herself for gigi to easily spot her. despite being in the library now, her thoughts were still consumed by questions about who this mysterious gigi could be. she was aware that she shouldn't be dwelling too much on a stranger, but doubts had begun to creep in, even though she knew she shouldn't entertain them.
as she waited, her mind oscillated between curiosity and uncertainty, grappling with the urge to push these thoughts aside and focus on other matters. y/n was determined to keep her emotions in check, yet the enigmatic presence of gigi kept tugging at her thoughts, creating an internal struggle she couldn't entirely ignore.
y/n's thoughts were abruptly interrupted by a voice calling out to her, "hey, y/n, right?" it was gigi.
surprised but composed, y/n responded, "hi, yes. it's me."
gigi smiled and handed over the notes, saying, "here are the notes. i need to leave right away since i have somewhere to be."
"alright, thanks a lot. goodbye," y/n replied with gratitude, watching gigi leave as she contemplated the encounter and the enigmatic figure who had delivered the notes. the brief interaction only deepened her curiosity about gigi, leaving her with even more questions than before.
feeling all kinds of emotion, y/n put the notes in her bag and reminded herself to pass by renjun's apartment later to give it to him.
fourth year
as graduation approached for y/n, she couldn't help but feel a sense of urgency. with only one more year left for jaemin before he graduated, she knew this was her chance to go all out. this year, she continued her tradition of sending him notes and small gifts, but there was one significant difference - she finally had the courage to engage in conversation with him.
they had slowly transitioned into friends, and y/n couldn't be more thrilled. woohoo! it all began when she got his number after their third year ended. from that point on, they started going out for lunch once every two months. it wasn't a regular occurrence, only happening when they both remembered each other or when jaemin had free time from his monthly or weekly important errands.
despite the infrequent meet-ups, y/n cherished every moment they spent together. gradually, their bond grew stronger, and y/n treasured the gradual transformation of their relationship, hoping that this newfound closeness would eventually lead to something more.
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this is the side of jaemin that y/n waited 3 and a half years for.
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lunch it is.
the pattern had become all too familiar - na jaemin would meet with y/n for lunch, only to vanish afterward for reasons y/n couldn't quite fathom. he would claim that the demands of his architecture studies were intense, requiring months of unwavering focus. while y/n understood the challenges of his field, she couldn't help but sense that there was more to his absences than met the eye.
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"Why does he need two phones anyway?" Y/n mumbled under her breath as she reached the table.
A sigh of relief escaped her when she spotted Jaemin's phone resting on the table, glad to see it wasn't lost or stolen.
"He's stupid," she grumbled to herself as she noticed his phone screen lit up. She instinctively reached for the phone, intending to turn it off. However, as she held it, her eyes couldn't help but wander to the conversation displayed on the screen - a conversation that unexpectedly caught her attention. Despite not intending to pry, the mention of her name within that conversation stirred her curiosity, prompting her to read further.
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y/n was fully aware that what she had done was wrong on so many levels. she knew she shouldn't have invaded his privacy by reading that private conversation. however, strangely enough, she felt a sense of gratitude for stumbling upon the truth she never knew she needed.
the revelation hit hard: na jaemin was only with her out of weariness. he had grown tired of her and all her expressions of affection - the gifts, the packed lunches, and her feelings. it left y/n questioning herself, wondering if she had been too overbearing or intrusive. but she couldn't ignore the fact that na jaemin was straightforward, and she would have stopped if he had just told her to do so. y/n was always understanding and respectful of boundaries.
yet, the truth remained a bitter pill to swallow. it hurt to realize that she had been fooling herself, clinging to hope and misinterpreting his actions as genuine interest. now, faced with the reality of his weariness, y/n couldn't help but grapple with the thought of letting go and moving on, even if it meant relinquishing the connection she had longed for with na jaemin.
"y/n, sorry i took so long. it started raining outside," jaemin explained as he approached her. "why aren't you seated?" he asked with concern.
y/n quickly wiped her tears, trying to compose herself before facing jaemin. however, her tear-stained cheeks gave away her emotions, taking jaemin aback.
"i'm so sorry, jaem," y/n managed to say before turning away and walking off, leaving jaemin bewildered by her sudden departure.
instinctively, jaemin followed after her, his confusion growing with each step he took. he couldn't understand why y/n was upset, and his heart sank at the thought of having caused her pain. he needed to find out what happened, to make things right again.
in the pouring rain, jaemin continued calling out y/n's name until they reached the parking lot, both now drenched.
"sorry for what, y/n?" jaemin inquired, trying to understand her sudden distress.
"for everything," y/n hastily replied, her focus on locating her car in the vast parking lot.
"did something come up? do you need me to drive you there? y/n, please talk to me," jaemin pressed, genuine concern etched on his face.
"i don't need you to do anything, jaemin!" y/n retorted sharply, her emotions getting the better of her.
jaemin fell silent, taken aback by the intensity of her outburst.
"did i do something, hmm?" jaemin countered, trying to make sense of her anger.
"did i tire you out?" y/n asked, leaving jaemin even more puzzled.
"were the packed lunches annoying? did the gifts annoy you? you know you could have easily told me to stop if you hated it. but you kept accepting it, you kept accepting me!" her words poured out, tinged with frustration and uncertainty.
"what are you talking about?" jaemin asked, genuinely bewildered by her accusations.
"you could've easily told me to go away and forget my feelings. why did you have to lie to me, huh?!" y/n's voice cracked with emotion as she bared her heart, seeking answers that seemed to elude her in this turbulent exchange.
in that moment, y/n's anger felt misplaced and unjustified. she couldn't help but feel that jaemin had every right to be weary of her.
"did you read it?" jaemin asked calmly.
"i'm... i'm sorry. i know i shouldn't have," y/n confessed, her remorse evident.
jaemin got his answer. she had indeed read the private conversation. if it were someone else invading his privacy, he might have reacted with anger, but instead, he felt sorry and scared. not for himself, but for y/n. he worried that she might have misunderstood the context of the conversation and jumped to conclusions that could hurt her even more. despite the hurtful truth she had stumbled upon, jaemin couldn't bear to see y/n burdened by further pain because of it.
"y/n.. i'm sorry," jaemin started. the rain continued to drench the both of them. "i'm sorry if i'm only acknowledging your feelings now. i'm sorry for lying to you. but i can't. friendship is the only thing i could offer to you. i'm not capable of loving anyone, y/n. not right now."
"i'm sorry too, jaem." y/n looked into his eyes with so much pain seeing nothing but pity to her and now she felt more bad. one last look into the man she loves before leaving everything behind.
weeks after that
from the instant she started moving away, a sense of unease settled upon y/n. in the days leading up to graduation, doubt gnawed at her, as if the choices she had made over the past four years were suddenly cast into uncertainty, leaving her with a haunting feeling of investing time in something that might not have been the right path.
stripped of her sole motivating factor, all due to her own foolishness.
in a decisive act, she meticulously cut the threads that bound her to jaemin, even extending her detachment to a few of his closest companions. a profound sentiment of shame now courses through her veins, an emotion as palpable as the weight of those four years that has suddenly descended upon her. the relentless toil, the countless hours spent perfecting recipes and perusing stores, each instance accompanied by the whispered refrain, 'this would bring a smile to jaemin,' now lingers in the air, suspended like the remnants of a wistful dream, leaving her heart heavy with a sense of squandered devotion.
a few more days slipped by, and y/n couldn't shake off that familiar feeling. today was supposed to be a total high point, a day of triumph. but with all those self-doubts clouding her mind, she wasn't sure if she had the green light to party. that whole jaemin situation still stung, and it was like an unwelcome guest at her celebration.
amidst the sea of fellow graduates, y/n ascended the stage, the cheers of thousands echoing around her. as she stood there, a distinct yearning tugged at her heart, a search for something or someone that eluded her in that very instant. a mere glimpse would have sufficed to fill the void she felt. yet, she was aware of the futility, for the one she sought, jaemin, was not among those donning the graduation cap this year. a year still separated his own moment of triumph from hers.
y/n returned home that evening, burdened by an unseen weight in her chest. little did she realize that the heaviness would escalate the instant she crossed her apartment threshold and unlocked her phone. it was as if the weight could transcend reality, threatening to plummet through the floor, shattering tiles and disrupting the tranquility of the neighbor residing below.
what unfolded before her eyes was a paradox, an unexpected contradiction to the jaemin who had shattered her heart. there he stood, unreservedly embracing a sense of love and joy, his beaming image accompanied by the words, "four years, finally. congrats!" the sight was jarring, a stark contrast to the version of him she had come to know. in that moment, it became painfully evident that the subject of the image was not her, nor would it ever be.
"guess you're capable of love after all," y/n mused inwardly, a bitter smile tugging at her lips as she stared at her phone.
fast forward two years, and it hit her like a ton of bricks – that was the moment of clarity. the very point where she finally untangled herself from him, and in the process, freed her own heart. she figured out something pretty straightforward: love wasn't some rare skill, it was just a matter of who you're dealing with. and right then and there, it struck her like lightning that jaemin was never going to be the one for her.
back in the mix of it all, two years back, she made a pact with herself – one day, she'd break free from the cycle of falling for him. she harbored a hope, a wish for the future: that someone, someday, would come along and love her just as fiercely as she had loved him.
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part two :)))))))
254 notes · View notes
forthechubbies · 1 month
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Love Thy Husband
Kingpin's Son!San x Innocent yet spicy! Chubby! Wife
You arrived adorned in luxurious fabric bought with their bloody wealth. You are not just a gift, but a treasure...a plaything acquired for the pleasure of the rightful heir to the Choi dynasty.
Choi San.
⚠️ Language, forced marriage, San is a good boy with bad habits, Yn conceals her face with a veil....and San is feral for your modest dressing style. No peep show for San 🙃⚠️
The purpose of a wedding photograph is to immortalize the beauty of that specific moment. Yet, when you stumble upon your own image, it triggers memories of your past yet your in laws so proudly display pictures all over their home. She was abducted by the man she now calls father to settle a overdue debt owed by her birth father.
You shed a tear, remembering your grim past.
As their son finally arrived at the mansion, he discovered his hidden surprise - a gift waiting for him. Despite the mysterious ivory veil that concealed her face, he agreed to accept her without hesitation. Little did he know, the veil was a humble plea from your father, who wished to shield his princess from the dark and dangerous world of the mafia.
The day unfolded before your eyes, obscured by the delicate ivory lace that draped over your face. Gripping the bouquet of baby's breath tightly, your heart pounded as the groom tenderly lifted the veil, allowing it to hover just above your trembling lips.
San's name escaped his lips in a hushed tone, barely audible against the backdrop of your rouge painted lips. Instead of forcefully pulling you towards him, he leaned in, delicately pressing his lips against yours. In the midst of this tender moment, he unintentionally crushed the bouquet.
The kiss, though seemingly pleasant, bore a resemblance to the innocence of toddlers exchanging affectionate pecks. He delicately pressed his lips against your flushed ones, refraining from any further advances. Despite his family now viewing you as his possession, San even restrained himself from touching you.
From that moment on, the vibrant world outside became a distant memory, The majority of your existence now revolves around the presence of your husband, consuming your every waking moment.. Who frankly you couldn't wrap your head around! One moment he’s stern and hostile the next, he’s a sweetheart gentlemen.
Speaking up the devil, There he is, Your phone icon alarmed you of husband’s incoming call. You rolled your eyes before answering. “Hello, San-"
"Omo..you sound like your about to die or worse." San complained under his breath. " You realize I'm your husband and not the grim reaper, yeah?" You could hear his blood simmering.
"Oh, you really had me fooled," you sarcastically remarked. Suddenly, you gasped, gripping your phone tightly, only to berate yourself for your own foolishness right away.
San’s brow involuntarily twitched, disturbed by the sass that escaped your cheeky lips. "What was that?... My dearest," he uttered with a tone that never ceases to send chills down your spine.
You carefully approached him, using his nickname in a soothing tone, "San..nie?" hoping to ease his anger. "My dear husband,” You’re cheeks reddening in embarrassment for actually fearing your husband’s wrath…some would say it should the other way around.
The phone went quiet briefly, only for your man to let out a chuckle that stirs up your fury, playing with you effortlessly. "Impressive, Sannie?.." He arches his eyebrows, making you squeal as he exhales his rugged accent over the line. "Sweetheart, I had no idea you could be this adorable." He taunts you in your mother language.
You are completely oblivious to the depths of your husband's affection for you. His love for you knows no bounds and shines brightly in every aspect of your life.
Especially your body....of what you allow him to see.
You feel safer when concealed from the sun, the man's wild gaze fixated on your delicate ankles and soft hands, pretending to be strong against his threats. You resist him so feebly, he longs to tear off your veil, granting you the illusion of courage to sass him, walk away mid-conversation, and disregard his presence as if he's not a menacing figure linked to the Atz, with his father just a phone call away from silencing your weak father permanently.
"I adore you, Mrs. Choi!!!" Wooyoung's voice echoed through the air, a mix of excitement and mischief. He sprinted towards San, seeking refuge behind him. "That asshole busted my lip," he growled, feeling the sting of his bloody lower lip. But despite the pain, he couldn't help but flash a mischievous smile at his friend, casually draping his arm over his shoulder. "So, how's the lovely wife doing?"
San sound shocked. “ How did you know I was-“
Wooyoung simply grins and nods. "You're adorable when you talk to her," he says with a mischievous smile, teasing his embarrassed friend.
The next thing you know you hear Wooyoung wince in pain, you assumed San hit him like usual followed by "Arghhh!!" Wooyoung biting him as a response.
"Don't fucking bite me, ya little bastard!" San's accent made you flinch, your Korean is far from perfect, and most of the time his words go unnoticed or you simply stare at his lips out of sheer cluelessness. But hey, it's not your fault. You were forcefully taken away from your family and thrown into this marriage with just weeks later.
"Ya! Who are you cursing at, cunt!?!” Wooyoung yelled in response, only to be met with a menacing voice hurling threats at them..
San's eyes gleamed with mischief as he glanced at the towering goon. "Hey, Woo, is this your buddy?" he asked, a sly grin playing on his lips. "Sorry, Honey, gotta go," he said, his voice dripping with allure as he abruptly ended the call. The unmistakable sound of San ruthlessly overpowering the goon echoed in the background.
Overwhelmed by the harsh truth, you found yourself standing in complete silence, consumed by the weight of this new reality.
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ambrosiagourmet · 3 months
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I notice no one has asked yet so for the character thing: laios! Or if you want to go for a less common one: the winged lion
Laios!!!!!!
First impression
Honestly its hard to even limit this within the confines of starting the actual manga. I genuinely think I'd have to say my real first impression of Laios was the "autism be damned, my boy can work a grill" joke that gets passed around a lot 😭
Impression now
Older brother.
Loves his friends and family so much. Let him infodump!!!!! A guy that can character arc so hard he becomes a king because its the only way to deal with the things he can no longer let himself look away from. A guy who wants to eat a good meal. A guy who wants everyone to eat a good meal.
A guy who can be all that and still kind of pettily complain that he doesn't get to hang out with monsters anymore & can mope about it soooo annoyingly. A guy who decided to eat the concept of all-consuming hunger because it was the only way to deal with the problem so he might as well try. A guy who can completely change his life by deciding to share his special interest. A guy who can imitate a dog really well.
Favorite moment
Don't make me choooose... okay I'm gonna do three:
1. Assembling Falin's bones with Marcille
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The humor. The patience. The slow realization that, despite how absurd of a task it is, it is actually all possible. The moments of admiration for the way skeletons work, the love of the details, the care of assembling all three skeletons just to make sure they get Falin right. Iconic scene.
2. Killing Falin
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"Unable to make myself accept. Unable to make myself resist" lives in my soul now idk what else to say. Life is so vibrant and horrifying and raw and beautiful and to let yourself fully be a part of it you must take up space. You must consume. You must fight. You must take and be taken from. Ourgh
3. Talking Marcille down
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I love that he looks so goofy on his way up to her. I love the context of how much he refuses to give up on her leading up to this, and how he refuses to give up on her now. I love how everyone is part of this scene, but he's the first one to cross the threshold. I love how she almost blows him up but can't do it (fun fact: this exact situation/post was how she killed Mithrun a couple of chapters ago. It was close).
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I love the way he appeals to her mostly just with messy honesty, and I love the silly three rules callback. It's such a sweet chapter.
Also honorary mention for the final page of the story, which gets me every time.
Idea for a story
I'm actually currently fiddling with a longer story concept dealing with the question of Laios needing an heir. Dungeon Meshi is grounded enough in politics that it genuinely feels like a question that the characters will have to grapple with at some point. At the same time, there's no way that like arranged marriage and even having kids in general are not messy topics for Laios and I don't think anyone involved would want to force him to be miserable.
(I also don't personally like the idea of Falin as his heir ftr, bc I think forcing Falin into that role sucks and I don't think anyone would go for it)
So how DO they deal with the issue? Idk! I might write a long meandering story about it! Maybe! I want to, at least.
Unpopular opinion
Ughhhh I don't realllly want to poke this with a stick but yeah I definitely think my most generic (apparently????) Unpopular Opinion with Laios is just that his relationship with Marcille is meaningful and loving. I personally don't view it as romantic and they mean a lot to me as a platonic-life-partners kind of thing, but I also think that dividing relationships in general into Ships TM and Definitely Not Ships isn't really appealing to me personally. I just care them.
(at the same time I really do worry about trying to write about them and it being taken as romantic despite me very intentionally not framing it as such. idk, navigating this stuff is complicated.)
Favorite relationship
UGHHHH LIKE. It is probably him and Marcille. But it's so hard to rank that against him and Falin. Both relationships mean a lot to me and I love them and I love to think about them.
Because him and Marcille have more on the page interactions to dig into and because I don't see them discussed as much, I do tend to gravitate to Marcille & Laios stuff above all else. But like.... don't make me actually commit to picking.
Favorite headcanon
I can't think of a strong answer for this so I'm going to make one up on the spot: I think he giggled to himself soooo much when he included the winged lion in his king outfit but made it so that it looks like the wolf head is eating it. I think he continues to giggle about it years later. I think he gets dressed in the morning and puts on his cloak and goes "get ate, idiot" as he fastens it around his shoulders.
Oh actually for a more genuine headcanon related to the story thing I mentioned above: I think Laios is really good with kids but would be scared of having any of his own. I think he'd have trouble with the classic "I don't want to mess them up the way my dad messed me up" abused kid struggle.
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gojocp · 7 months
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no surprises
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cw: angst, geto just makes me so sad bruh idek, post riko arc featuring: suguru geto
a/n: this song is so sad and i feel sad and yeah i dont really know where i was going with this. also i need someone to like super deeply analyze geto and his character and his morals and everything, cuz i don't think i did it right but whatever. lmk how this is !!
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"a job that slowly kills you, bruises that won't heal.." ─── ・ 。゚☆: *.☽ .* :☆゚. ───
'exorcise, consume, exorcise, consume, exorcise, consume, exorcise, consume, exorcise, consume, exorcise, consume, exorcise, consume, exorcise, consume, exorcise, consume, exorcise, consume, exorcise, consume, exorcise, consume, exorcise, consume, exorcise, consume, exorcise, consume, exorcise, consume, exorcise, consume, exorcise, consume, exorcise, consume, exorcise, consume, exorcise, consume, exorcise, consume, exorcise, consume, exorcise, consume, exorcise, consume, exorcise, consume, exorcise, consume, exorcise, consume, exorcise, consume, exorcise, consume, exorcise, consume, exorcise, consume, exorcise, consume, exorcise, consume, exorcise, consume, exorcise, consume, exorcise, consume, exorcise, consume, exorcise, consume, exorcise, consume, exorcise, consume, exorcise, consume. over, and over, and over again.'
'exorcise, consume, exorcise, consume, exorcise, consume, exorcise, cons-'
"suguru! you got the curse?" you call out.
he slowly turns towards you, a blank look on his face. "yeah."
"hmm.. they don't taste good?" you half-heartedly joke, wiping the curses blood off your hand.
"they're curses, what do you think they taste like?" he questions, tired from the day of missions.
"i don't know, you tell me.." you say, giving him a soft smile.
after he moment of thinking, he responds, "like a rag used to clean vomit."
"oh!.." you pause, "how about we head back?"
wordlessly, he walks past you and heads in the direction of the school's building. .・。.・゜✭・.
"you look so tired, unhappy."
"you okay..?" you ask, as suguru crawls into bed. he never takes more than 15 minutes in the shower, always complaining that you're wasting the water. but recently, he's been in the shower for over an hour. you know that it's a way for him to drown out his worries, but frankly, you feel worried.
he's changed since riko's death. and not for the better.
"long day." he responds, turning away from you.
"hmm.. you wanna talk about it?" you ask, laying down next to him and wrapping an arm around him and pulling him to your chest.
"i'm.." he sighs. "i'm so sick of this. i've had enough of the sorceror life. i know how it'll end."
"it was so much.. pressure. just living. because i was one of the strongest, i had to look out for the weak. i don't get it. humans are the cause of the curses. it''s their own fault. why should we have to protect them from something they caused?! there's no point!"
"i mean, they're causing their own suffering. and i can't stand it anymore."
"i've made up my mind, (y/n).." he sighs, "i'm done."
"well..." you start, "there's always a reason, suguru. i know how you're feeling, and i promise you, it gets better. you just need to pull through."
and he tried, but maybe that wasn't the answer he needed. maybe he didn't need one at all, and just needed someone to listen. because when you woke up, he was gone. and an entire village was massacred.
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lilacsareinbloomagain · 9 months
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Hello. Can I request scenario of yan Leon getting arrested for kidnapped his "love" for at least a year and Reader visiting him in jail for the first time in months? Be it headcanons or fic is your choice.
Also please don't use daddy kink. I'm sorry but I'm just... not into it.
I hope you had a nice day 💚
I hope you have an awesome day as well, thank you! Also, I hope this will be to your liking, thank you for the request!
Notes: I may have written too much more than requested, sorry I really don't know what came over me (I wish I knew because dang)
This is most likely an older Leon, since cellphones and all, but you can imagine him up to Leon from RE4!
You didn't specify if you wanted NSFW or not, so I didn't put it, just to be sure, however if you did want it, do request! Be as specific as you want, I'll try to meet your expectations.
Realistically, Leon could have stuff like PTSD and/or panic attacks, but a yandere version of him would totally use it to guilt trip the reader.
I did my research on prison visitation, keyword, my, it may be wrong, I've never visited anyone in prison, or in the US, for that matter.
TWs: Yanderism, Probably unrealistic lock picking, Kidnapping, Financial dependence, Implied NSFW, Guilt tripping, Implied stalking, Off Screen panic attacks, Stockholm syndrome.
Yandere!Leon S Kennedy x Reader
I may be late for Christmas
Yours and Leon's relationship was troubled, to say the least. Of course, you weren't surprised when it came tumbling down.
From the start, Leon had problems, however you had rose colored glasses on. From the start, you should have expected an end to the relationship, one that probably wouldn't be calm and pacific like anyone would hope for.
Leon was full of secrets, Leon was clingy, Leon was a manipulator, Leon was possessive, Leon was controlling and on top of all, he was obsessed with you. Only, you took too long to notice it.
Leon let you know from the start that he hardly had any free time, his job was time-consuming as it had him go away on long work trips, and that was okay, it was his job and the way he went about his life was none of your business. You didn't mind, in the very start, that is.
The fact he never disclosed anything about his job to you, besides that he worked for the government, was only a small part of the process that was you wanting to give up your relationship.
Because of his lack of time, whenever he did have free time, it was spent smothering you, and it's not that you minded the attention, but it got suffocating when you could barely do your own stuff, like go to your job, visit your parents, spend time with your friends and things like that. There was a wide list of things that Leon would complain about and try to coax you out of doing just to spend more time with him. At the start, you did push aside your basic responsibilities out of guilt for not spending enough time with him, letting him be your priority, like he always said you were his.
When you were away doing said responsibilities, however, Leon found other ways to make himself present, even if not physically.
That is, if you ignore the fact he was present, just not somewhere you could notice him.
Your phone was constantly blowing up, forcing you to make use of the silent option in your phone much more than you used to, having to deal with his grumpy mood when you got home, your phone full of missed phone calls and another fifty messages of "I love you", "miss you", "let me know when I can go get you" and "pick up the phone".
From time to time you checked your phone to see if there were no emergencies, sometimes having to excuse yourself to the bathroom to go and comfort him, soothe him out of his panic attacks. When those happened, his messages sounded more distressed through small changes one could easily pick up on, like "please pick up the phone" or "I need to hear your voice". Those times, when you did pick up the phone, he sounded like he was breathing too much, but at the same time out of breath, you could barely understand his words over the phone, something about him thinking you were dead just because he couldn't feel you in his hold.
As a result of those times, when he was finally calm enough to let you go back to what you were doing before, you were left pondering. You even considered the possibility that he could have been in a war. After all, what could possibly have caused him to have these types of attacks? You may not know much about panic attacks, but something told you that whatever he didn't tell you was just the missing piece of the puzzle, the one you desperately needed to be able to truly understand him, to be able to love him completely, the way that he so desperately needed, and the way you so desperately wished you could.
Besides arriving late at your appointments since Leon insisted on keeping you with him longer, distracting you with one thing or another until you were almost an hour late to stuff, most of the times you also had to drive to his apartment sooner than it was expected of you, even having to leave your job earlier just because Leon insisted there was an "emergency".
There were also those days when he basically made you skip what you had to do, calling your boss, friends or even parents to give some kind of excuse for why you wouldn't be able to be where you were supposed to while pressing your face deeper into the mattress to muffle your sounds underneath him.
Honestly, at the start, those were your favorite days. But you can only skip so many days in your job to get fired, and do so many things before your friends get sick of it and your parents grow concerned and distant.
You decided to talk with your trusted friends and see what they thought about it, and it wasn't very hard to understand that you had to reinforce your boundaries if you wanted to get your life back on track.
And you thought Leon would understand, you thought he'd be okay with it, that the conversation would flow smoothly and in the end, you'd both get what you wanted in a healthy way.
Sadly, you weren't exactly a lucky person, and neither was Leon understanding like you hoped he'd be.
The conversation was fruitless, in the end, Leon managed to make you feel guilty. Like you were in the wrong. You didn't press on, noticing that what was supposed to be just a peaceful conversation was now bordering on a discussion, one you didn't want to have, afraid you'd lose, even if you were so sure you had a fair point just hours ago.
However, Leon pressed on. He grew suspicious you didn't think about confronting him all by yourself, and he wanted to know who exactly convinced you to try and get your point across to him. He began listing your acquaintances, friends and family members until he mentioned one of your closest friend's name and your expression shifted for a moment, he scoffed.
"So that's who, huh? You really talked shit about me to them?" He shook his head and walked away with heavy footsteps while your guilt ate away at you, you betrayed his trust, even if you didn't really talk shit about him, only saying the truth while having a necessary talk with a friend who was beginning to grow more and more concerned about your well-being and safety.
But he managed to get you to feel like you needed to apologize and make it up to him. For that, he couldn't help but smirk in amusement once you weren't looking.
By making it up to him, one of the things he hinted on, was the fact you needed to put more distance between you and this friend that clearly didn't like him. Soon, more friends met that same fate.
Because of your lack of a job and inability to look for another one since Leon gobbled up all the time with you he could get, you were growing short on funds. Rent, food and other basic necessities starting to seem like they required a lot more money than they used to, when you were actually employed.
Even if you didn't express your needs to him, he started to notice how you seemed constantly anxious, and of course, even an idiot would catch on the fact that, if you didn't have a job, you didn't have money.
So he convinced you to live with him, which meant being a homemaker, basically.
Leon didn't ask you to do anything, but it felt fair, since he was taking care of all your needs you could at least do what you could to pay him back. He furrowed his eyebrows, tenderness shining in his gaze when you told him that, he pressed a sweet kiss to your lips before muttering important words against your lips. Ones you should have found alarming and not sweet.
"Love, I'm your boyfriend, not your boss. All I need from you is to stay with me and to love me."
He needed you to stay with him. Love was a second thought, a bonus. Not as important as just staying with him, he needed you, more than anything else.
His love was more than enough for the both of you, anyways.
You started to feel better, even better than how you were before, your's and other's concerns about Leon being swept under the rug. As a product of that, you felt like you should use the rest of the money you had from your job that you didn't need anymore to buy a Christmas gift to your parents, since the end of the year was approaching and you wanted to make up for the lack of visits and phone calls over the course of the last few months. That included spending Christmas at their house.
When Leon got home from another of his long work trips and initiated a long cuddling moment with you, asking you to rant about whatever you were up to during the time he was gone, as he always did, you thought that was the best time to mention to him about your little planned visit to your parents for the holiday.
You seemed so excited, wanting to bring him over as well, if only to enlighten the view your parents had of him, to show them he wasn't as bad as they made him out to be, and of course to make sure he wouldn't be left alone, since he hated being away from you so much.
He wasn't happy, of course not. Even if he was there with you, being in a completely different setting and place he wasn't used to and didn't assure was safe for you meant he had less possibilities of keeping you safe. And there was also the fact your parents didn't like him, even if you didn't tell him directly, knowing it could upset him, he heard your conversations with them and saw their texts on your phone. If even your friends were able to make you doubt him, your parents could easily put the wrong ideas in your mind about him, convincing you to leave him, the mere thought of it made his blood boil.
But as much as he wanted to express that to you, try to coax you into giving up about going, he knew better, he knew that could bring at least a sliver of suspicion into your mind, and given the previous circumstances, he couldn't risk it. He had already made it so far into the relationship, you were basically already in his grasp, only one step was left to ensure you'd stay with him till the end.
Taking away your chance of getting away from him.
Disguising that as moving you from his apartment to a whole new house at the outskirts of the city.
You didn't really question his sudden urge to move, or the location, but you should have, since one day, you just woke up with your keys and phone completely vanished.
Leon made a half assed excuse when you finally decided to confront him, but this time you didn't buy it, of course. Not even his pouty expression that normally made you cave in worked to make you change your mind about going against his wishes this time.
For the next few months, you both seemed to be in your personal hells. You made his life harder as much as you could, while he took away the last bit of freedom you had, finally and accidentally making you see how that freedom was merely an illusion, since he had been controlling your life from the start of your relationship. This made you angry, angry at him since he had no right to do this to you, and angry at yourself for putting up with this for so long and not standing up for yourself, for not listening to your friends or even your own family when they tried to warn you.
Screaming didn't work, apparently, not only his house had thick walls but he didn't have many neighbors to hear you scream, either.
Breaking windows wasn't a possibility, one strong shove of a chair was enough for you to find out about the armored glass Leon made sure to add in case you even thought about the idea of breaking through them. Of course, that didn't keep you completely from breaking the windows, the glass could be bulletproof, but at some point it had to shatter, right? But there was the fact that Leon would undoubtedly restrain you in some way from doing so before you could even get close to achieving it, so that alternative would have to stay as a last resort.
Then again, you could always pick the lock.
Common sense told you picking a lock wouldn't be as easy as it seemed in movies, but since Leon was away in another of his long ass work trips you had a lot of time to figure it out. More than enough, actually, since after using the bobby pins in many different ways you were finally able to get the door unlocked.
You didn't know if you wanted more to celebrate or cry out of happiness, so your body made the decision for you, running as quickly as your legs could take you to the nearest person, house, anything. You could even scream until someone heard and came to help you, any previous embarrassment that would have been taken in this situation was forgotten.
Safety was at fingers grasp, but to really be safe, you needed to file a police report.
At first, you hesitated to do so. Even after finally being in a safe space, at your parents house and away from the captivity Leon called a house, a home for the two of you, the one you spent a year in, maybe a few months more, since you were celebrating Christmas with your parents, as you wanted to do one year ago.
You were kind of one year late for the holiday, still, both you and your parents were happy you were alive and safe.
The whole police report filing was a hard process. You were reporting a government worker, one trusted and of importance apparently, their negative reactions made that really clear.
At the end everything went well, the reality surprising you by going against your nightmares and constant worries. The fact your parents had filed a report because of your disappearance last year having played a big part in it.
Leon was brought into prison. Finally letting you and everyone that cared about you rest.
For months, you didn't hear from him, nor did he hear from you. It was maddening for the man to stay in his cell, unaware of how you were and if he'd ever be able to hold you again.
He would, he told himself he would, everyday, that was the only thing keeping him sane. If he could even still consider himself sane.
He barely slept without you, spending his nights only being able to think, think and think some more about how and when he'd get out of that confinement to see and feel you close to him. He missed you too much, he basically only did stuff during the days because he had to, if he didn't, he wouldn't get to see you again, and he'd be damned if he didn't get to see you again.
What mostly kept you both apart were the joint efforts of both your friends and family along with the ones in the police department that knew about your story with Leon. After all, as much as you tried to rid yourself of your love for him, the one you knew wasn't natural but Stockholm syndrome, Leon wasn't, he wasn't trying at all to rid himself of the absolute love and obsession devotion he had for you. No, he was actually actively seeking you out, putting a whole lot of effort of his own into getting people to keep him updated on you, getting help from the ones that weren't trying to keep you away from him.
If he wasn't insane before, he was certainly growing closer to it now, being kept physically away from you for so long like that.
After months of Leon being kept in prison, you finally decided to visit him. Your friends and parents being firmly against it, but you were stubborn and they couldn't really deny you from doing anything, you were a free adult, you could do whatever you wanted, even if what you wanted was to go and visit your captor in prison, under the possibility that he could have changed, somehow.
They all knew you were lying to yourself. You knew you were lying to yourself.
There was a bit of hesitation in your step as you walked into the building.
Eventually, after you stated simple things as the likes of who you were visiting and who you were, along with proving what relationship you had with the inmate, receiving a quite weirded out look from the receptionist when you mentioned you were the one kidnapped by him, you finally got in, following after the guard guiding you into the visitation room.
You settled on one of the chairs inside the room, in front of a small table, another chair positioned across from you. Your eyes nervously wandered across the room, focusing more on the door you supposed Leon would soon come out of, your foot tapping against the floor rhythmically.
After what felt like a long time, but at the same time, not long enough, Leon walked inside the room, eyes finding your own quickly, his footsteps almost faltered, expression staying strong, firm, despite his glassy eyes and the slight quivering of his lip, small tells of his real reaction upon seeing again in so long. You were only able to catch onto those because of the amount of time you spent with him, he let his walls down for you, and only you.
You stood up on shaky legs, seeing him approach you with almost slowed down steps. Your worries about him being mad or having an explosive reaction upon seeing you again were discarded when he pulled you into a hug, not saying a word as his arms gently enveloped your form, his head buried against your neck, just feeling you. Your skin, your scent, your warmth, your existence.
The embrace lasted little, way less than what he really wanted. He held your hands firmly as you two stood in front of each other. You were still at a loss for words, should you apologize? Say you missed him? You were feeling a lot of emotions, most of them you were unable to even explain.
"I missed you."
You were almost scared when he opened his mouth, taking a short breath before speaking, his words sounding soft, almost like a whisper, his eyes still twinkling with unshed tears he was trying desperately to keep in.
He didn't say anything else. He knew what he did, and he knew why you reacted the way you did as well, he couldn't blame you for having done what you did, but he wasn't regretful for what he did, either.
The words stuck in your throat, you wanted to say the same thing back to him, but after opening and closing your mouth a few times he got the hint, moving on with the conversation, you had a time limit, and he wanted to make the most out of it.
"Are you okay? How are things going?" Leon gently pushed you to sit down on your chair, going and taking his as well, his hand not letting go from yours, positioning positioning your linked hands on top of the table.
He didn't want to ask if you had moved on, he didn't want to know, he wanted to entertain the thought you still loved him as much as he loved you.
"Things are okay, I have a better job now, better apartment…" Better life... The words went by unsaid, but he caught onto the hint. Your voice almost didn't register to you as you spoke, your attention being kept on your joined hands on top of the table, his thumb rubbing circles on the back of your hand. "My friends contacted me again. At least, most of them did."
You wondered if you should also ask him how things are for him in prison, but you didn't know if you wanted to know, you didn't want to feel guilty again, you already felt it enough just by thinking of him, confined in this place.
You couldn't help but feel like you had done something bad. Leon wasn't a bad man, he just… Loved you too much.
Sometimes, it was hard for you to remember that said thought wasn't one of your own, but rather one that came as a result from the time you spent in the toxic relationship you had with Leon.
"I'm happy you're okay." He didn't, but there were guards watching the two of you. He doubted he would get out of prison early if he said everything he was thinking at the moment, everything he wanted to do, everything he needed to do. If he did, his hard efforts to behave over the course of the months there would go to waste, your trust in him would be beyond salvageable, probably.
The rest of the hour went just like that, with Leon letting you talk about anything and everything going on with your life, like he did when you two cuddled once he came back from one of his long work trios. He noticed as the tension seemed to leave your body, the familiarity in the action bringing you the comfort you had missed for quite some time. It seemed your trust in him would take a while to rebuild, but not as long as he expected, or you, in fact.
When your visitation hour ended and the guard called out to you both to go back to your respective paths, Leon hugged you again, not resisting to pull you into a kiss, one he missed way too much. You didn't resist against him either, thankfully, making him smile in the brief kiss.
"I love you." He said as you pulled back, him letting you do so, unwillingly. "So much, too much."
"I love you too." The words came out smoothly, naturally. It had been so long since you last said those words to him, it felt weird, like you weren't even supposed to say that.
He smiled in response, walking away from you slowly, glancing back every now and then as you also parted.
His plan was in action, you still loved him, that would make everything so much easier, you'd be back in his arms soon enough, then he'd be able to indulge in you and give you everything he hadn't been able to in so long.
He'd make sure there were no loopholes this time, this time, you wouldn't even want to leave.
Just you wait.
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olderthannetfic · 6 months
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It's very exhausting seeing people in my fandom get angry that an author deleted his work prior to committing suicide. Everyone's sad they don't get to read the story. I have not seen a single person even pretend to dislike the fact that a person is dead. I have seen two people say, respectively, "he could've at least given us a content drop first, end on a high note" and "content creators who don't at least leave the content up shouldn't post".
And I know, I know, fandom olds: it is parasocial and toxic and bad to expect anyone online to dislike the death of another person, I'm a Gen Z snowflake, I need to grow up, etc. In my defense, I am neurodivergent and probably not seeing this correctly. But as an admittedly fucked up person... I kind of don't like 1. the fact that a human being died 2. no one even saying "oh that's sad" or feigning valuing human life 3. everyone referring to him not as an author but as a content creator and 4. the only thing I've seen people discuss is wanting content.
I don't really vibe with the concept that people in fandom are just content mills that exist to hand us content day in and day out and that's all that matters. This dude had whole conversations with people in the comments, he was really nice and gave people encouragement, commented on his readers' fics, and he never had an unkind word to say about anyone. He answered questions on his tumblr and always had funny, weirdly specific memes for everything. And some of the same super-distinct usernames I remember him interacting with are the ones complaining about content. Not writing, just content, that demeaning internet term that also applies to AI.
He was the one who inspired me to start writing and now I don't know if I want to post. I don't want to be seen as a content mill, a bot who spits out something to be consumed that's seen as more important than a person. I don't want to contribute to this weird culture where fiction matters more than reality.
Again: I know. Snowflake, Gen Z bad, fandom olds unbothered and cool, etc. But I never claimed to be cool. I just claim this is not how fandom should be. We should be hanging out, talking to and supporting each other. You don't have to be friends, but you should aim to not see art in terms of content creation and consumption.
IDK, I don't really think I'm explaining this clearly. I just feel like we should try to not be assholes.
--
Uh... that's not what parasocial means, you weirdo, and no fandom olds think it's in good taste to whine about somebody who committed suicide not going out on a high note.
Don't be an ageist twit when you're just repeating what anyone older would say.
I assume people are reacting this way because 1. people are jerks, duh and 2. they probably don't pay attention to internet acquaintances' "suicides" after way too many fake ones.
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konigsblog · 2 months
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small question! hope this doesn’t come off as offensive! but, i have a hard time understanding non-con/dub-con. for some reason, this has been on my mind for a few days and for some reason it isn’t going away 😭
so, basically what i’m saying is: “why do people get mad when you write apparently “horrible things” when it’s fan fiction?” aswell as: “what’s the difference between reality and fiction?” because i have a hard time with that too :’)!
cw; RANT
thank you for asking politely, my love !! i may not be the best person to ask, as my opinion isn't that non-con is horrible, but here's my take on it. 🫂💗
fiction and reality :
when i say the difference between reality and fiction, i mean that my work isn't hurting any real human being, as i put appropriate triggers on my work. there's no real person actually getting raped when i write non-con. in reality, there are real people getting raped everyday, people who are actually hurt. they need to focus on the real life SA victims rather than what people headcannon a fictional character to be. i think the issue is, is that the COD fandom has become sensitive. they don't like when someone's headcannon doesn't align with theirs, but that's the whole point about headcannons; they're not all going to be the same. no real person is getting hurt by my work, as the characters are fictional people, and it's not real, it's not actually happening.
fiction is fake, reality is real. there are no real people getting raped or raping others, we put warnings so people don't get triggered at the sound of it though. some people refuse to listen to the triggers, reading it anyways and getting annoyed because they've triggered themselves purposely. it's not my responsibility to cater to everyone's needs, i can't tell you what to read or write, that's not my responsibility. it's your responsibility to be in charge of the media you consume, if you're unable to do so, then get off the internet.
why people get offended :
people get offended that i write about rape because they don't like it, really. i understand, completely, 100%, rape is a triggering and a sensitive topic to talk about, it will make someone uncomfortable. but that's the whole reason we have trigger warnings on our posts; no one is forced to read something they don't want to read, we're giving them warning prior so they don't get triggered or offended. other times, people complain it's harmful to SA victims, but again, they're not forced to read non-con posts, it's 100% the reader's choice to read it.
and i do want to point out, that the people claiming this harms SA victims, don't actually care about ALL SA victims. i mean, these are the same people who claim to support all SA victims, but the second someone uses non-con as a coping mechanism, they think they're ‘disgusting’, or ‘horrible’. the second someone's coping mechanism involves reading non-con, they go badshit crazy. and they don't think about the impact and how HURTFUL what THEY'RE saying is. me writing non-con isn't harming SA victims as i'm not forcing any victim to read it, but telling a SA victim they're ‘disgusting’ for their coping mechanism IS HURTFUL. reading non-con is a coping mechanism THERAPISTS have recommend and said it's a healthy way to deal with trauma (as they would have control over the situation, unlike before), it's ridiculous to see people whining over people having different coping mechanisms, all while claiming they support all SA victims.
you can't say you support all SA victims while claiming some are disgusting for having a different coping mechanism. you either care for all, or you don't at all.
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