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sstan-hoe · 2 years

Text

𝑯𝒆 𝑺𝒉𝒐𝒖𝒍𝒅𝒏'𝒕 𝑳𝒐𝒗𝒆 𝑯𝒆𝒓

𝒑𝒂𝒊𝒓𝒊𝒏𝒈 — andy barber x fem!reader

𝒔𝒖𝒎𝒎𝒂𝒓𝒚 — he is defending a girl who is charged for murder on three man; she is a criminal, and he is her lawyer who can’t stay away from her knowing what she is (you)

𝒘𝒂𝒓𝒏𝒊𝒏𝒈𝒔 — TRIGGER WARNING ⚠️ 18+, mention of rape and cheating, mention of abuse and murder. blood and guns, knifes, SMUT, dirty talk

𝒏𝒐𝒕𝒆 — originally planned as a kylo ren fic but Andy just fits better so here we are! like, reblog and please do comment! I also made Andy taller so that even of you aren't short he can still tower over you! if that is not what you wanted then im sorry i tried — Follow @sstanhoe-updates for updates cuz I have no taglist, *not my gif

“Ma’am your lawyer Mister Barber is here.” The officer stated as he stood at the door frame between the hallway and the screening room.

You lifted your head as a tall man probably around seven feet give or take, his brown wavy hair that was perfectly styled, with a navy-blue suit and a matching tie rounded the whole look of.

He looked professional however he was a man he wouldn’t understand, would he?

You remained quite just like you did for the past three hours as the first some officer, than a detective questioned you.

“Miss Y/l/n…I’m Mister Barber your lawyer.” His deep voice broke you out of your thoughts, your eyes catched his gaze and he stretched his hand out for you. “I’m not deaf.” You replied in a monotone voice.

“What?” He asked confused, “excuse me, not ‘what’ and again unlike you probably, I’m not deaf I heard what the officer said meaning I don’t need you to repeat it.” You glared at him.

Barber turned back to the officer giving him a nod, giving him permission to leave.

The lawyer sat down in front of you while setting his suitcase on the ground. “I will ask you one question and you will answer me honestly, no one will hear it besides me; did you want to murder those three men or not?” He asked you ignoring your comment a few seconds ago.

You huffed and leaned back into the chair which was very uncomfortable, “yes, yes I did want to kill the three man.” You watched him close, trying to figure out his next move.

Barber was taken back the answer but didn’t show any reaction, he sighed quietly and folded his hands together in front of him. “I’m here to defend you…and you are not making this easy.” He stated his eyes searching for any kind of regret.

“Why would you want to kill three innocent men?” “I wouldn’t,” you simply said while crossing your arms over your chest.

Barber was at loss, never before had an accused said the truth if they really murdered someone or not, they always pleaded not guilty. Barber wasn’t stupid, there had to be reason that those men were dead, and the only explanation was they had done something to you, right?

“Okay, let’s walk through the ‘accident’; You were at a bar and talked to a man with whom you later went home however the man couldn’t walk properly so two other offered their help-“

“No, he walked perfectly fine I don’t know why the police acts like he couldn’t.” You cut the lawyer of who furrowed his eyebrows in confusen.

“They offered their help…and when you got home, you invited them in for a drink and then…you were about to kill them if the police wouldn’t have knocked.” He continued speaking, slower this time waiting for you to cut him off.

“You think you know every detail huh? How would you if they went with me? Right ‘evidence’ yeah I’m going to tell you the true whole story…”

11:15pm

Walking into the bar down the road of your apartment with a smile you waved at the bartender who already knew you given you were a regular and would come in for one pina colada every day.

I sat there on the bar stool minding my own business when the first came up, he had platin blonde hair with too much hair gel…

“Hey baby, can I buy ya a drink?” He greeted you with a disgusting smirk, you smiled politely at him before saying, “no thank you, I’m just here for one drink and then I will be on my way.”

“Well, if that’s the case why don’t I wait for you and then will show ya a good time huh?”

He came closer and closer, he almost sat on my stool while his hand trailer over the back of mine and up my arm…

He smelled like one of those cheap colognes that men think are sexy, no they aren’t. His breath smelled like at least five bears, a wonder he could even talk and walk like that, but he did as if he almost drunk nothing.

“No thank you, I really appreciate it however I also have a boyfriend waiting on me at home.”

I don’t have a boyfriend, not partner at all.

The men didn’t seem to care and started trailing his disgusting hand up your leg causing you to jump slightly and slide to the each of the stool at least you tried.

11:30pm

I left, the man followed me in the dark. At first, I didn’t notice him, but I always been paranoid so I the shadow of his from the streets light how he kept his distance but still followed.

You pulled your jacket tighter to your body while picking up the pace to get the hell away from there.

Suddenly there were two more…I don’t where they came from however, they seemed to know on another. He stayed on my side of the sidewalk while the other two walked across the street, from time to time sharing a glance with him.

11:45pm

Before I even reached my apartment, I had already gotten out my keys and was ready to walk inside…

Fumbling with your key you quickly opened your door, but when you thought you were saved, a foot stepped between the door and frame. “Not so fast baby…”

He was taller than the blond but had more flesh, you could call him fat if you wanted and then there the third who had a disgusting grin, his teeth yellow and smelled like he came fresh out of the garbage.

“No please, please…”

I pleaded, cried and wanted to scream.

They came inside and closed the door, walked into the kitchen and pulled each one a beer out of the fridge while pulling you along with them.

I always have beer in the fridge because I like the taste or when my neighbours Bucky and Sam come over who were on vacation that weekend, they both are gay might be important.

One of the ripped your jacket off you while the other made his way to your pants.

Before they could touch me there, I stretched my hand out barley reaching the knife, but when I did…I stabbed the one that held me down in the eye. The other two looked at me in horror, I didn’t care I just kept stabbing, kicking, screaming…

12:00am

The men looked dead, the floor covered in blood that you tried wiping away with a towel but made it only worse.

A knock on the door pulled you out of the trance, opening the door there stood two officer. “Evening ma’am, we were called because…” He didn’t finish his sentence, he saw your blood-stained hand and blood spatter on your cheek with cold eyes watching him.

“He pulled out his gun and they dragged me outside to the car, kept me in this station for the past three hours. I know the law and just kept quiet until my lawyer came.” You finished they story.

Mr. Barber couldn’t believe what he had just heard, it all made sense now. “Before you say somethig I have a question for you.” He nodded giving you premisson to continue. “Do you believe me?” You almost sounded desperate.

“Yes, I do however even now that I know the truth it won’t be easy to get you out of this easily…you have to understand that you almost killed someone, and if the three men die in the hospital than not even showing regret will help you.”

Your eyes snapped up at his words, how could he say that. “I’m not sorry for hurting them. If I didn’t, I would have been raped!” Your chest felt heavy as you shouted at him.

“I know! But it is still murder mayhem and if we don’t have any prove that you were about to get raped, that it was self-defence and if the three men don’t survive…it won’t end good for you.”

Tears filled your eyes, you never wanted your life to go like this.

“No, no don’t cry, I will get you out, okay? For now, I’m going to find a way to get you home.” You quickly shook your head at his words, you couldn’t go home.

“No, I can’t go in there, everything remembers me of that night!” Your lawyer sighed and looked up to the ceiling thinking about what he should do with you now. “Can you go somewhere else?” He asked to which you shook your head.

“Okay…you will live with me, I’m going to get you out of here now and you stay put.”

“Not that I do anything else.” You muttered under your breath as Mr. Barber walked out of the screening room.

When he came back, he had an officer – that you had never seen before – trailing behind him with a key for your handcuffs. You wondered how he got you free as you stood up and followed him.

Rubbing your sore wrist, you asked him how he could get you out. “I have eyes and ears everywhere, the officer is one of my men and he take care of it.” He told you as he helped you into his car.

“Thank you Mr.-“ “Andy, you can call me Andy.” Andy said to you with a small smile. “Then I guess you can call me Y/n.”

A phone – Andy’s – began to ring, he immediately picked up, “Steve any news? Mhm, yeah make sure those three fuckers live….No she’s innocent, it was self-defence.” He talked a bit more, but you zoned out as you looked out the window watching the trees fly by.

Reaching Andy’s home, you were suprised when you noticed it was a house, a big one you have to admit, but no wife or kids.

“Are you working?” He suddenly asked causing you to snap out of your trance, “uhm no, I mean like part time things but that’s it.” Andy nodded and walked down the hallway while you roamed around the house.

As you sat down on the couch you realized your phone was still at your place including other stuff that could reveal your secret.

Andy walked back into the living room, “the guest room is down the hall to your left and if you need something my bedroom is just by the kitchen two rooms on the right and my office is on the oppisite of the guest room, bathroom is two doors next your room and well the kitchen, you can see the kitchen from here.”

The house sounded as huge as it looked, “my stuff is still at my apartment can we get that?” You asked him as you played with your fingers.

Andy nodded without hesitation, the police was long out and the men where in the hospital meaning no body was supposed to in the apartment. He took his keys and phone before gesturing you to follow him.

The car ride was silent, a comfortable silence.

As you got out of the car your eyes met a man with curly brown hair and a man hanging on his arm, a smile spread on your lips instantly.

“Y/n!” Bucky Barnes your neighbour shouted when he saw you and ran up to you.

“What happened? We go on one vacation, and you get framed for murder?” He shocked and held you back at arm length inspecting your face.

“Currently the men are still alive.” Andy’s voice spoke up before you could even think of an answer, the lawyer walked up to you with a glare directed torwards Bucky and his hands in the pockets of his trousers.

“Who is that jerk?” The curly haired man asked you with a raised eyebrow. “My lawyer Bucky, I will be staying with him for a while because I just can’t live here right now.” Your gaze fell down to your shoes which looked more interesting at the moment.

Bucky had known you for almost over a decade and knew that look all to well, he catched on what happened without you even saying and nodded before he pulled in a hug, “I’m getting you a witness, your not getting in jail not after all this time.” He whispered in your ear low enough that Andy wouldn’t hear.

“They need to live Bucky, even a witness wouldn’t help me if the died.” You replied in whisper, Bucky nodded his head. You were right and he would try to pull some strings.

“I’m really sorry to cut into this heart-warming moment however we need to be quick.” Andy once again interrupted your moment. “Take background check on him and text me, he has to live to get me out.” Were your last words to Bucky before leaving him.

Walking through your apartment you searched if there was any evidence against you but then again you aren’t stupid.

“Who is this?” Andy asked as he looked around the room noticing a picture of a girl with blonde hair and brown eyes, next to her a man with short brown hair smiling just like her. Turning around your eyed the picture, “my best friend and he boyfriend, she gave it to me on my birthday because she always joked how I’m such a mom.”

Andy nodded and continued standing there looking around the room while you gathered your things.

“Finished.” You stated watching Andy closely.

He only again before walking to his car with you trailing behind him.

As Andy drove you back to his house he couldn’t get the image of the blonde out of his head, she looked familiar and this not in a good way.

A long time ago he was put on a case with a man who was killed by his girlfriend for cheating, and he was supposed to be the one defending her however the girl was never found, Maya Jones was her name.

She came from a normal family it was almost as if it was from a childrens book where everything was perfect, she had no medical record on any mental disease or so…

What made her do it was the question he asked himself everytime he read over the case.

“The uh girl…where did she live?” He asked out of nowhere making you look confused. “Oh, she? She lived here but moved to Louisiana two years ago.” Andy kept his eyes on the road as he thought about your words.

“What was her name?” “What is this supposed to be? How is the relevant?” A sigh left Andy’s lips as he met your gaze for a moment.

“She could maybe help the case.” “Sophia Woodsen.” The response came quick, without thinking. It could either mean you were telling the truth, or you told the story one too many times.

“You should call her, the best would be if you did it right now.” He told you with a serious expression. “I don’t think right now is a good time, she could be at work.” You never let anyone see through you and you surly wouldn’t start now.

“I’m sure she wouldn’t mind, she would be doing you a favour.” Andy shrugged, he knew something for sure you were certain.

“Do you even have her contact?” He questioned again with a raised eyebrow while propping his arm on the car window, resting his chin on his hand. Andy felt how uneasy you got, he was meeting the right points.

“Of course, I do.” You replied as you crossed your arms over your chest. “Then call her.”

“You know a few years ago I was put on a case, the woman killed her boyfriend without any reason, he was a decent guy with a good job and no criminal record…completely innocent.” He suddenly said, he was planning on getting under your skin.

But you wouldn’t let that happen, “poor guy, I’m sure the girl got her punishment.”

The car stopped, you were back at Andy’s house. As he got out of the car he rolled his eyes, this time you had won…with luck.

A smile set on your lips as you unbuckled the seatbelt, he really thought he was smarter.

“Did I tell you that I can cook? I could make us pasta or something.” You offered him when you walked through the front door, you went to you temporary choice of room to unpack your things.

Andy never cooked, always ordered in or just ate a sandwich the change would be nice he had to admit.

“Yeah, sounds not too bad.”

When you entered the kitchen, you saw Andy dressed in a black sweater paired with black sweats and he looked delicious, if you wouldn’t be here to cook you would have eaten him.

“Do you need something?” He questioned putting the newspaper down, “nope just enjoying the view.” You answerd with a smile, Andy was caught off guard at your answer. “So, you like what you see huh?” He catched himself in the same moment.

You just smiled at him and walked around the kitchen island to stand in front of him. Andy was easily towering over you, you gently traced your fingertips on his arm.

Andy caught your wrist making your eyes snap up meeting his gaze. “I know what you’re trying to do sweetheart.” A small smile appeared on your lips, “oh, really? What am I trying to do?”

He lowered his head down, his eyes never leaving yours, “you think you can seduce me, distracting me…so I won’t find out that youkilled your boyfriend and have a lot of blood on your hands.”

“I don’t know what you are talking about.”

“I think you do, you tried to keep it a secret make you seem innocent and those men…did they really harass you?” Slap. You had slapped Andy across the cheek with a raging glare.

“How dare you! I would never kill innocent men, I told you. That bastard cheated on and had the audacity to abuse me for going out with friends when he was fucking some girl! And those three idiots? Gosh if that blond jerk wouldn’t have screamed and the other thought, he could escape then I wouldn’t be in this situation right now.”

Andy smirked causing your face to fall, “no! No, no, fuck.” You muttered and turned around to run away, but Andy was quicker and snaked his arm around your waist.

“Who else did you murder huh? Tell me the truth sweetheart…” “Only men who deserved and you will be if y-“ He put his hand on your mouth muffling your words as you struggled against his chest.

“You won’t do a thing, I will help you get away this one time because they deserved i-“ A hiss of slight pain cut through his words as you bit him in his hand. “Really?” He asked in disbelief.

Again, you made a run for it. Andy shook his head going after you, he thought you would be stupid to run to your room however he didn’t expect that you pulled out a gun out of your bag.

“I know what kind of man you are Andy Barber, thinking that a woman in distress needs a strong man to look after her.”

Andy took a step back as you aimed the gun on his head. “And don’t think I will miss…I didn’t miss in the last ten years, and I won’t start now.”

“If you kill me now then you will always have to be on the run, your lawyer mysteriously goes missing? After you are most likely to be locked up for murder…” He had you there, of course he was right.

“Why would you help me then?” You questioned with a raised eyebrow. “They deserve it and murdering them is mercy! They have to pay for their crimes and murder would just get them out of it.” You considered his words for a moment slowly lowering the gun but having the finger still on the trigger.

“Put the gun down sweetheart…put it on the drawer, okay?”

You put the gun on the drawer your hand still lingering on the soft brown wood as you watched him closely.

“Good girl. Now come here…” Andy held his hand out for you, you wondered where this was going as you walked over to his gripping his hand. “You wanted to make pasta yeah? Let’s do that.” He wanted to distract you.

Andy lead you back to the kitchen, but you still didn’t trust him.

He positioned you in front of the counter before he put his hand on your hips, your first instinct was to push him away but in the next moment you sat on the counter and Andy was going over to a cabinet filled with all kinds of pasta.

“Spaghetti?” He asked holding them up, you nodded in response. Putting them next to the stove he grabbed sauce and a pot that he filled with water.

“I can help ya, you know? Just because I threatened you a moment ago.”

Andy rolled his eyes and put the pasta in the boiling water while he made a pan ready for the sauce without answering you.

As everything was cooking Andy turned around and put his hand gently on your thighs.

“When was the last time someone touched you huh?” He asked, even when you sat on the counter Andy was still taller than you. “Did my threats on Barber?” You asked him with a cocky smirk.

“Maybe.” He whispered before closing his lips over yours. You would never admit that you had thought about this moment since he walked through the door in the police station.

And now you could feel his soft, warm lips gliding over yours.

Andy squeezed your sides making you gasp, he used the opportunity to slide his tounge inside your mouth causing a soft moan to leave your lips.

“The things I want to do to you sweetheart,” he breathed out as he pulled back and rested his forehead against yours, “but I shouldn’t you’re a criminal…” Andy with a faint smirk and you scoffed playfully.

“Please it turns you on breaking the law and thinking about all the things you want to do to me…come on tell me.” Your hands rested on his neck while Andy’s hands traced down to your legs closing them around his torso.

“I want to see those pretty little lips wrapped around my cock, I will fuck your throat make you choke.” He pushed his clothed groin against you meeting your cunt.

“I bet you are soaking huh. I could just push right in there and don’t need to prep that dirty little pussy, I will drag you to the bedroom and fuck you…face down on the bed.” A desperate moan left your body as he started dry humping you.

“Such a needy little thing…come, come for me.” Right as you came the stove started ringing signalling that the pasta and sauce was ready. “Food is ready and then it’s time for dessert.”

#andy barber fluff #andy barber imagine #andy barber x reader #andy barber smut #andy barber #andy barber au #andy barber x black!reader #andy barber x woc!reader

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ggukkiereads · 3 years

Note

Hewwooo!!! Do you have any fic recs where the boy is the piner one? and oblivious!oc or something like that... it's always the other way around 😣😣 thank you so much!

🌷 Hello anon! These are what I remember.. Strangely most of them are part of my #holygrailfics which I marked with a carrot 🥕 But, everything is a must read 🥰

UNREQUITED LOVE AUs - Member!Pining

💔 Most of the stories will eventually achieve redamancy. There are just few fics here where it’s unrequited all throughout

Re: Untitled @to-star-lake - Jungkook 🥕

↳ Arranged Marriage, Childhood Acquaintances, Enemies to Lovers, CEO/Executives, Angst, Smut, Fluff [4/4][

This is really one of my favorite discoveries 🥰 At that time there wasn’t much info or even comments on the fic so if you’re not as daring to try fics out, it’s easy to assume it’ll be just a regular story. But I'm glad my curiousity won because this is such a gem. It was painful and lovely unpacking all the discoveries in their relationship (or lack of) per chapter 🥰. I swear the plot “twists” per episode made the fic extra memorable.

Frost Impressions @fortunexkookie - Jungkook 🥕

↳ Teacher AU, Gamer AU, Simultaneous (One-Sided) Enemies to Lovers, Best Friends to Lovers, Idiots to Lovers AU, Humor, Tooth-rotting Fluff, Smut, Heavy Pining, Slight Angst [one shot]

ugh this just puts a smile on my face every time I remember this. I was just thinking about this Jungkook the other day. OC is oblivious because, well, they have this E2L thing going on. Plus he didn’t exactly give a great FIRST IMPRESSION. So many AUs thrown in but author was able to squeeze it all and produce this masterpiece. It’s just a feel-good fic 🥰

Love So Shallow @jimlingss - Taehyung 🥕

↳ Best Friend AU, College AU, eventual Roommate AU, eventual Pining [3/3]

also one of the best written OCs in fic land. Please read this gem. I still gush over how their relationship developed and you’ll see how the “pining” develops too. It’s a great Love Yourself theme too!

Paper Cranes @aquaminwrites - Taehyung 🥕

↳ Slice of Life, Childhood Friends, Best Friend AU, College [one shot]

Ugh my heart ached for this Taehyung. I don’t know why I feel bad for him (I mean, it wasn’t as if he was to be pitied) but the way author wrote his story is guaranteed to pull at your heartstrings.

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The Key to My Drawer @jjungkookislife - Taehyung 🥰

↳ Best Friend AU, Childhood Friends, Epistolary (letter form, some parts), Angst, Smut [12/12]

I was just thinking about this the other day because we’re just waiting for the last chapter/epilogue and then I saw the notif on ao3 that it got updated. What do you do when you get hold of a key to a drawer and discover unsent letters from your best friend? All addressed to you? It’s such a creative way to tell a story and I enjoyed this very much 🥰

(please access the rest of the chapters through the author’s masterlist)

Please Be Naked @floralseokjin - Yoongi 🥕

↳ Rebound AU, OC is Namjoon’s Ex, Namjoon is Yoongi’s ex-friend [8/8]

“you were still a little unsure why he and your ex....had bad blood.” of course we all want to tell OC why! Seriously, this is a classic if you haven’t read this yet. Yoongi’s just top-tier in this. Unforgettable characterization. Even if you are not into Yoongi fics, this is a must read for bts fics in general. The angst/smut is just 👌; then read the drabbles for the fluffy future

One Thing Right by hobios - Jungkook 🥕

↳ Arranged Marriage AU, Fake Marriage AU, Childhood Friends AU, Enemies to Lovers, Police Office AU, slow burn [8/8]

So I am adding this to every fic rec list because like RE: Untitled, there’s a lot of discoveries in this fic. It’s always a question why Sheriff Jeon will agree to a marriage of convenience (I mean he’s committing fraud in a way). So it’s wonderful to discover a lot things about their story since they had a falling out.

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Roses, Poetry, and Jeon @seraphimguks - Jungkook ⭐☕💌

↳ bookstore au, enemies to lovers-ish?, fluff, slight angst [one shot]

This is just so beautiful and it is like curling up by the window on a rainy day with a warm hot chocolate. I think in my review I said the shift to Jungkook’s POV is like seeing poetry in action. Must read and instantly a favorite of mine

Tinder 2.0 @tayegi - Jungkook 🥕 🔥

↳ sex app/room, Coworker, Enemies to Lovers, Crack, Smut [one shot]

This is kind of different from the rest of this list because it’s more crack and smuttier. The pining is not as intense but it’s there. Please give this a read too.

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Fluff and Smut @jinggabitch - Jungkook

↳ smut, porn star JK, OC is a fluffer, one-sided pining [drabble]

Porn star JK is in love with his fluffer. - I remember reading this months ago and I found it so cute. Though it’s just a drabble, which means the story didn’t continue on, I got invested in this JK and hoped he gets what he wants.

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Bad Influence Collection @noteguk - Jungkook ⭐🔥

↳ FWB AU, Enemies to Lovers, Enemies with Benefits, College, Bad Boy AU, Smut [4/?]

please click the link to the masterpost so you’ll access the very first story. Maybe it didn’t start out pining at first but the recent chapters we see Jungkook getting so affected over OC (it’s mutual but I feel at this point its more JK trying so hard not to show heart eyes 😍). Ugh, the joy I feel whenever this gets updated. Still ongoing but better start on this since some chapters are over 10k+ wc.

Hot Enough @soft-sarcasm - Yoongi ⭐🔥

↳ College AU, Fuckboy AU, FWB AU, Yoongi caught feelings (kind of Unrequited AU), Smut, Angst [one shot]

I’ve read years this years ago and when I decided to officially have a blog, it took me months to find this. It’s just memorable because usually it’s the female catching feelings in a friends-with-benefits scenario. But here, OC actually rejected him (that’s the start of the story). Please read and find out what happens next.

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First Love @jungnoir - Yoongi

↳ bestfriend au, OC about to get married

so this is sad at first because it’s only hours away from her wedding but read until the end 😍

Not Yet + Almost @bratkook - Jungkook

↳ neighbor AU, kinda fake boyfriend (on the spot) to annoy OC’s Ex [2/?]

ahh this is cute. I shouldn’t be smiling at Jungkook’s pain but it was just so cute. It’s more of mutual pining though. The first drabble is more on JK’s while Almost we get to see OC’s thoughts. So, I guess in the third???

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Pining 101 @guklvr - Jungkook

↳ hospital au, friends to lovers, idiots to lovers, humor, fluff [drabble series]

a collection of drabbles based on pediatricsurgeon!jk dealing with his crush on generalsurgeon!reader. Read if you’re looking for something light and humorous.

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Sidekick @bananagukkie - Jungkook

↳ superhero au, best friend au, fluff [one shot]

You didn’t realize that your best friend was in love with you or the fact that he was Busan’s “newest” hero.

Lifting the Veil @/fortunekookie - Jungkook 😭

↳ real unrequited love/pining, friends to lovers, smut, angst [one shot]

so yeah I guess read this first because it sure is angsty then read other fluffy fics (like Pining 101 or Frost Impressions)

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Requiem @cinnaminsvga - Jungkook

↳ pretend confession!au, angst [drabble]

Jeon Jungkook loves you. You love someone else. He lets you say “I love you” to him, if only so that he gets to hear it once in his life. - so yeah, let’s cry about it 😭

Unveil @nijoonie - Jimin

↳ Arranged Marriage, Childhood Friends to Lovers

angsty tones in the beginning. Jimin is such a dear 🥺

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Best of Me @/floralseokjin - Jimin

↳ Best Friend AU, OC just got heartbroken, angst

ugh just angst all over. The ending is hopeful but still sad?

Piece by Piece @underthejoon - Seokjin x Reader x Hoseok ⭐

↳ bestfriend au, fwb au, love triange, a collection of drabbles where your love life is muddied up by two men – the one you love and the one that loves you. Smut, Angst [drabble series]

if you are not into love triangles, I think this will, well not change your mind because some people strongly dislike love triangle themes, but it’ll make the LT themes bearable. The writing is just beautiful and actually I’ve reblogged this for Hobiuary Day (one day I was on Hobi lockdown just reblogging purely favorite Hoseok fics) but I haven’t written a review or reaction yet. Read and explore their relationship dynamics 😭🥰

🌷 so, I don’ recall a Namjoon fic where he’s the one pining (usually it’s the OC).

I had a great time recalling scenes from each fic (and what made the pining so angsty) 🥰. So, please enjoy!

#🌷 chats #anon #bts unrequited love #bts mutual pining #bts fic recs #bts fanfic #bts x reader #bts angst #ggukkiereadingcollection #jungkook x reader #yoongi x reader #taehyung x reader #jimin x reader #jungkook fic recs #taehyung fic recs #yoongi fic recs #jimin fic recs

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mittensmorgul · 3 years

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For anyone interested in long-term residence in the supernatural fandom, please have some observations I’ve made over the decade I’ve been here. Take it or leave it as you will, but I’ve found all of this info useful over the years I’ve been here.

I wrote this yesterday, and it achieved its mission of identifying the sort of folks who would react negatively to it (i.e. a lot of block lists have been updated), so now that it’s been edited for content, it’s going under a cut (because that is how we do things on tumblr in general, unless we have a deliberate purpose for annoying readers with excessively long text posts) for the sake of people who actually do care about the fandom and its history. If that’s not you or your reason for being here, then keep on keeping on with your own thing, I guess. For those who are interested, there’s a lot of fandom resources some of us have been building for years that you might enjoy knowing about.

First off, I’ve been informed by a few friends who’ve read through this for coherency’s sake that it sort of reads like a *shakes cane from porch* fandom grandma complaint, but honestly... I earned this rocking chair and goshdangit imma rock now. So apologies for any “back in my day” vibes or faint aroma of tiger balm this post might give off. Then again, it’s loosely based on a similar post from 2012 so like... time is a flat circle anyway I guess.

1. There is no such thing as “tumblr famous,” unless you’re referring to the hilarious and delightful fic of the same name (please go read it, you will cackle). Posting Hot Takes for imaginary Clout™ on this site is kind of pointless in the long run. Sure you can post solely for the sake of stirring shit and getting notes, but the majority of the folks who do aren’t long term residents of the fandom. They’re just tourists moving through our little beach town for spring break. If you’re actually intent on moving to this corner of the fandom for an extended stay, please bother to really feel out the permanent residents and understand the culture and general mood of the neighborhood. It bears no resemblance to whatever’s going on across town where all the bars and beach parities are happening, and those loud, drunken revelers are, again, gonna disappear back to their regular lives or on to the next party eventually. That doesn’t mean the fandom is dying, it’s just evolving.

(funny how I had several comments implying that I’m just trying to keep the fandom from evolving with this post, because I sincerely do want the fandom to continue on for years to come, and that is impossible without evolution. We can evolve without self-immolating, though. mostly i included point 1 for an excuse to push ancient but hilarious fanfic on you.)

2. Once you post something here, it’s been unleashed to the fandom winds. You never know where it will end up, or who will comment on it or add to it. Remember that time Misha tweeted the link to the Epic Cockles Love Story post? No? It was wild. That was 2012. They all know we’re here, and how to find us if they want to. Please don’t take it to their doorsteps.

Obviously if someone is being a dick on your posts, please feel free to block them, but the whole entire point of this site is to engage people with your posts. Being big mad that someone reblogged your post with comments or supporting evidence, or happy headcanons or “HECK THIS IS GREAT BECAUSE (insert personal story about their experience or whatever else made them Feel Things about your post)” is frankly ridiculous. If your goal is to avoid any sort of engagement with your posts, then maybe try instagram instead. From what I understand, there is a SPN fandom presence there, and nobody can tarnish your original posts with unwanted commentary. But the ability to reblog with additional commentary is a FEATURE of tumblr that builds community through conversation. Otherwise we’re all just talking to ourselves in a vacuum, and that’s what actually kills fandoms.

(and for the folks who just want to blog how they want to blog and don’t want people to engage on their posts at all, please feel free to block anyone you want, as well... nobody wants to step on your toes, but most of us also don’t want to walk on eggshells wondering if this post is one of the “do not add comments for any reason” sorts of posts, either. This is a huge fandom and most people can’t even begin to keep track of every creator and their url du jour, and what their personal rules might be regarding interaction with their content. Including a “please don’t add comments” note at the bottom of your posts-- and not in your tags that won’t even show up on reblogs, but in the actual body of the post-- would sincerely help avoid any awkward or unwanted interactions, too. At the end of the day, you are in control of your own fandom experience and the block button exists.

For the record, I block zero fandom blogs (which is why I posted this, I wanted it to reach a wide scope... refer to the opening paragraphs as to why).

3. Since this post was partly inspired by a tag I left on that post going around about how “previous tags” mean fuckall on this site (which you can read here), just a reminder that if you like someone’s tags or feel they add value to the post, part of the Peer Review structure of tumblr encourages you to PASTE THEM INTO A REBLOG. If you do this, then at least credit the person who actually wrote the tags! Don’t just copy someone else’s tags into your tags on your reblog of the post without credit either. They were not YOUR tags. (I have had this happen to tag rambles I wrote and someone else got credited with them on a subsequent reblog and it is FRUSTRATING). Just... don’t even bother to write “previous tags” because WHAT PREVIOUS TAGS?! Nobody is gonna bother to chase back the chain of reblogs trying to find where the mystery tags came from, friendos. That way lies madness.

(for the record, since some folks seemed to focus on this point solely, writing “previous tags” on a post isn’t inherently a BAD thing, but for anyone who actually is here for more than one-off shitposting, then it’s sort of a pointless thing in the long run. This wasn’t intended to suggest people who ARE here for one-off shitposting are bad or “doing it wrong,” but for people who might actually want to preserve that hilarious joke or insightful comment. People delete posts and entire blogs all the time around here. Links break. I get that the upcoming generation just shrugs at that and moves on with their lives, but heck... you don’t have to accept that all entertainment is disposable if you don’t want to. There’s a bizarre sort of nihilism plaguing us all about the impermanence of pretty much everything that feels like something we should be fighting against rather than buying into wholesale, even in our escapist entertainment. I’m just exhausted by the complete loss of joy in community.

*shouts from the peanut gallery* IT AIN’T THAT DEEP, JUST GET SOME FRESH AIR AND LOOK AT A PUPPY OR SOMETHING

Yes... yes it isn’t really that deep, but bigger picture in the state of reality we’re all entirely disillusioned with, are we supposed to just give up on everything, including the things we cling to because they bring us a tiny spark of hope that we’re not all just trapped in this dystopian nightmare and things might actually be worth living for?

*peanut gallery clinging to burnt husks of peanuts in a barren peanut field* but this is how we have chosen to cope

Okay... you do you... I feel bad for you but if that’s the case then this post is NOT FOR YOU. AND THAT’S FINE. I honestly do not care if you don’t care! I mean, I’m sorry anyone has to live in a world that drives them to that mindset, but I understand. This post is for anyone who might look at their lives and their choices and think “no wait, I unironically enjoy this and want more from the experience of that enjoyment than I’m currently feeling.” Everyone else can continue with their lives as usual.)

4. CONTENT THEFT IS NEVER OKAY. PERIOD. Things like “credit to the artist” or tagging gifs or images you found on pinterest as “not mine” isn’t actually credit. If you can’t source an image or gif set, DO NOT POST IT! We don’t REPOST (i.e. save an image and then create a new post with it as if it was our own creation). We REBLOG (click the little square arrows and reblog from the actual creator). That goes for gif sets, fanvids, screencaps, meta, fic... everything.

(hopefully everyone here already understands this one, but I felt compelled to include some “these are stupidly obvious” reminders anyway, since this is ostensibly some sort of advice column. This is the equivalent of the warning label on your toaster reminding you not to use it in the bath. Like... duh...)

5. Close kin of item 4 is SOURCE YOUR SHIT.

(for 100% disclosure purposes, I specifically discussed this one in this specific way because of an influx of anon ask messages I received in the wake of the finale. Literally the inciting incident for creating this entire post was what I can only assume was a joking ask about a comment Misha made at a con years ago. Someone actually bothered to take the time to type out those sentences to me. I have no idea what they were expecting in reply, or what could possibly motivate them to send this comment about something so entirely random from, again, several years ago. Just a joke? No idea, but whatever... it got me thinking that there might actually be people who are new to the fandom who MIGHT actually care about the fandom history, and maybe they just don’t know where to go for that info, or how to even begin searching through 16 years of history for things they might actually find enjoyment in, rather than just hauling random out of context garbage out on main and pointing and laughing about it now. People are actually allowed to care about things. It’s not cringeworthy to actually care about things, and you are not alone in actually caring, and there’s this whole big room over here full of people who are thrilled to share in that with you. This post is intended FOR THOSE PEOPLE SPECIFICALLY, so if that is not you, please just continue walking by.)

Yes, I know lots of y’all are new around here right now, but dredging up stuff from years ago that fandom has completely debunked and presenting it as TRU FAX again is just exhausting. We’re not trying to be party poopers, but seriously, we have seen it all and are mostly done with extinguishing bags of flaming dog poop on our front porches for the umpteenth year in a row. I’ve seen a lot of posts that have the same tone as “I saw Goody Proctor dancing with the devil” or “I heard kylo ren has an eight pack” and just... the information is there for anyone who cares enough to find it.

This goes double for “why is nobody talking about this thing I just discovered while watching the show for the first time?!” And, oh hon, we have talked it all into the ground over the last fifteen years. We’re happy you’re discovering it again, but I promise we talked about it plenty when the episodes originally aired. We have such a rich meta history that lots of us have worked really hard to preserve. I encourage you to seek it out, if nothing else than as historical artifacts. The way we have discussed the show has been a 16-year evolution. People have written literal doctoral dissertations on this show. Your shitposts are fun! We love reliving our own experience through fresh eyes, and seeing your wonder at experiencing it all again for the first time! But y’all didn’t invent this fandom in the last six months, either.

Meta Sources and Minerals provided by our friendly neighborhood fandom archivist, @lets-steal-an-archive

Academic books and articles about SPN

A collection of Meta Essays going back to s1 and organized by topic (all of this has happened before, all of it will happen again)

SPN Heavy Meta Archive (s1-3)

Mel’s Dreamwidth archive of meta (s1-12)

Oranges8hands Dreamwidth archive of meta (s1-15, with many similar entries to Mel’s... though ymmv on viewpoint in a lot of these too)

Anyone remember Fandom Wank? Not the concept but the actual LJ... No? Okay have a link to SPN topics that ended up there. Through 2013. We have seen so much... including several fandom containment breaches.

for all your art sourcing needs, please see @theroadsofararchive, the repository for so much fandom art.

need to find a gif of something? canonspngifs is a vast repository of gifsets of the entire series. If the gif you want to use in your post happens to be the first gif in the gifset, in the tumblr gif finder thingy just paste the permalink to that post from canonspngifs (which is easily searchable by episode, character, location, situation, quotes, and sometimes even color and clothing items the actors are wearing... it’s really well organized, especially for tumblr >.>) and the first gif will be automatically linked with credit to the gif creator attached. It makes life easy that way. It’s also convenient when trying to remember something specific but can’t remember what episode it’s from. I’ve used the site to jog my memory before going to the superwiki armed with more specific search results to find episode quotes and references. Or sometimes I just scroll through all the nice gifs for fun, too.

Need a screencap of something and know exactly which episode it’s from? Try Home of the Nutty. You might not find the exact screencap you’re looking for, but they have a complete set of caps of every episode, and it’s an incredibly useful resource for quick reference checks and the like. Just give pages a chance to fully load before clicking on the next one. The site is easily overloaded, but it’s still free to use (and again, with credit... Pretty much every screencap on my entire blog is from HotN unless otherwise credited).

As you can see, this is a fandom built on preserving our history. You absolutely are not required to engage with any of this if that’s not of interest to you, but I can only assume that there are people who would be interested in it if only they knew it existed and how to find it. Well, now they do.

6. A few more notes on tags, and how they work on tumblr. The first 20 tags on your ORIGINAL posts are searchable sitewide, so if you want to be able to find something again, tag that thing first before going on general tag rambles. The only place tags on reblogs are searchable is on your own blog. So you don’t have to put 50 tags trying to get a post seen if it’s a reblog. You’re just spitting into the wind at that point. If you have a filing system for finding things again, then by all means add those tags (again, in the first 20, so they’re searchable), but you don’t need to tag a reblog “destiel” and “deancas” and “dean” and “cas” and “dean x cas” or whatever. Pick one for your personal blog’s filing system, that’s all you need.

(this was only added because tagging and searching on this site is so very broken... I get that a lot of folks don’t care about ever searching their own blogs again for anything, so this one only really applies if you do often find yourself trying to find old posts. If not, then it’s not really relevant. It took me years to work out a decent tagging system, and at the beginning of my time here I never thought I’d end up camping out here for a decade and falling this deep into the fandom, and I regretted my lack of consistent tags only years later when I realized I actually wanted to be able to go back and find specific old posts again. So... for anyone who wants to err on the side of caution, working out a sensible tagging system really helps if you’re here for the long term. I personally tag content by episode, because some of my other general tags are so large as to be practically useless as a search term. But whatever system you choose to file stuff on your own blog, it really only has to make sense to you. And again, if this is pointless advice for someone who has no intention of settling here for the long term. Please feel free to ignore it. I just wish someone had explained it this way to me ten years ago and saved me the hassle of retroactively tagging something like 30k posts... especially now that using the mass tag replacer is the fastest way to get your entire blog deleted... oops? so yeah, don’t use the mass tag replacer either >.>)

7. Tags on Tumblr DO NOT WORK LIKE TAGS ON TWITTER. If you @ someone in the body of the post, it will show up in their notifications (if they’re the sort of person who even checks their notifications... not all of us do. For the record, I generally don’t...), but putting actor or ship names in the tags on a tumblr post does absolutely nothing. It’s not the same as tagging the actor’s twitter account in a tweet. Nobody’s getting notifications about you tagging a post about Jensen here as “Jensen Ackles.” There is a difference. Please learn it. (and don’t take headcanons and ESPECIALLY RPF or otherwise explicit art or fic from tumblr to twitter and tag the actors in it. That’s just... not okay.)

(I have seen the pearl clutchers getting all in a huff about the mere existence of RPF or even explicit content of fictional characters if it doesn’t meet their purity standards, but tagging those things allows people who don’t want to see it to actively avoid that content here. Nobody has a right to tell people their fictional content shouldn’t exist at all, or that creators of that fictional content somehow deserve harassment or threats for having dared to create such “immoral” content, won’t somebody PLEASE think of the children... and no... you do not do that here. Don’t be the problematic behavior you wish to ban from the world. Learn to use tags to protect yourself from, as i have attempted to emphasize here, fictional content you are personally upset by. That’s a you problem, not a problem for the creators of potentially upsetting content that they tag appropriately for.)

8. General formatting stuff: If you’re writing long text posts, visually break them up so people aren’t faced with one long wall of text. The enter key is your friend. Also, if you put long text posts under a Read More break and send people to your blog to finish reading, please ensure that your blog is actually visually accessible (tiny text, or light grey text on a dark grey background, or a visually busy background might be aesthetically pleasing to you but nobody can actually read it. Loads of folks won’t even try. Which is great if you don’t actually care whether people are able to appreciate your content or not, but something to at least consider if you *do* actively want to encourage engagement with your work. Confirm how your blog looks on both mobile and desktop and make sure it’s actually functional in both, too).

And since I mentioned that most of my experience on fandom tumblr has been in the SPN fandom, here’s a bit of a reminder for folks who are new around here. With the reminder that I have been here more than a decade and still feel like a newbie myself sometimes...

This is an OLD FANDOM. There are many, many people who have been at this longer than some of you have been alive. The average age for creators in this fandom is older than you think (I think of my friends in their 30′s as young’ins okay? okay). With that understood, you are responsible for the content you consume and are exposed to. Curate your experience. Ship and let ship. YKINMKATOK. Don’t deliberately expose yourself to content you find upsetting for whatever reason. Tags and warnings are your friends, not targets for you to attack in some sort of purity war. People will ship things you do not like (or in specific ways you do not like), will say things you do not agree with, and will find their happiness in things you abhor. That is not your concern. Find what you do like, and support and engage with it, and ignore (or block, or unfollow) the rest. Tumblr has a feature that lets you blacklist tags so the content you’re trying to avoid won’t appear on your dash.

Remember the paradox of tolerance.

It is not your job in fandom to police how other people enjoy the fandom. It’s not *my* job to police how *you* enjoy the fandom, UNLESS your enjoyment is in actively harming other real human beings in the fandom. If you don’t like their take on the character or the show or the plotlines or their ships or anything else, you don’t need to engage with their posts at all! The necessary corollary to this is that clarifying misunderstandings or correcting factual misinformation is not “policing.”

(this is where the peanut gallery reminds me it ain’t that deep, and I plead with them to put down the social media and find just one (1) thing to actually believe in in this godforsaken life, find something other than disdain and cynicism and spite to live for. If those things motivate you to find a larger cause for yourself, then great, use them to your advantage, but use them to find something that makes you a better person or brings you a modicum of joy and connection to your fellow human beings despite living in a dystopian hellscape of a world)

I have seen a lot of posts lately that are founded on the sort of authority that comes with “I watched through tumblr for a few months and then watched the last three episodes of the series” and as such are just... missing the larger context of the entire show, and are unfounded entirely in canon. I 100% appreciate the new enthusiasm for the fandom that we’ve been living in here for years, and it’s wonderful to see new people enjoying the thing we love. Your headcanons are valid, you are valid, but recognize that your headcanons aren’t canon. All of us finale denialists have accepted this in some measure, so we feel you. We truly, truly feel you. But regarding actual canon, we have a resource for that: the Superwiki. Learn it, live it, love it, as Metatron would say.

(which you could discover he said in 10.17 Inside Man, thanks to the superwiki! accept no substitutes!)

(and again, there have been people who have been involved in fandom for years who haven’t engaged with canon in years, either! You can play in this universe however you choose, BUT FOR PEOPLE WHO ACTUALLY CARE ABOUT CANON AT ALL, WHICH I AM AGAIN POINTEDLY SAYING MIGHT NOT BE YOU, READER, AND I’M NOT SUGGESTING YOU ARE WRONG FOR NOT WANTING TO ACTUALLY ENGAGE WITH CANON, but if you DO want to engage with canon, please have some useful resources. Why do people feel personally attacked by being presented a list of helpful resources? Absolutely baffling.)

(also: words have definitions. “Canon” is a specific thing, meaning in this case “the finished media product that aired on television.” Anything beyond those limits is secondary canon (think: john’s journal, which is not canon but canon adjacent at best...), word of god (i.e stuff said by the writers and showrunners), or headcanon (which includes actor commentary-- they may have helped create the show with their acting choices and whatever, but they are not in control of the story overall). If there’s something you dislike about actual canon, you can reject it and supplement it with your own theories or preferred outcomes-- that’s basically what fanfic is-- but that doesn’t make your theories canon (much to all our dismay, that’s just not how any of this works. This is not to invalidate how anyone engages with the show or the fandom, just trying to clarify what seems to have been a source of unintentional misunderstandings. Your theories do not have to be “canon” to be legitimate interpretations.)

***I am setting this section apart, and did make a separate post of just this following information, because this is where we go from being relatively chill about different parts of fandom choosing to interact in different ways and you do you and blog however you want, to “hey can everybody please understand that the way you are interacting with this specific material might be harmful for specific legal reasons, and stating that you do not care about the consequences of your actions does actively make you the asshole here...” Okay, now that we have that understood:

The spnscripthunt collective has been steadily acquiring new scripts (which are posted in full on the superwiki for everyone to enjoy, for free). The language around how some folks are talking about these scripts is... concerning. For very real legal reasons, actually, and not because we’re feeling precious about the collection and don’t wike it when meanies use them in shitposts.

-First off, these scripts are not “leaks.” They are all verified and legally purchased (or gifted, in some cases, but still acquired entirely above board. we didn’t whack anyone over the head in a back alley for these scripts, or swipe them out of someone’s trailer on set).

(in case anyone was unaware, these scripts are the copywritten protected property of Warner Brothers. So yes, how we use them and share them with the fandom could have legal repercussions. We present them as a collected resource of fandom history which SHOULD fall under Fair Use doctrine, but this is untested legal water. Insinuating that the scripts are somehow not entirely legally obtained, or that posting them for public access involved less than 100% transparent and entirely legal transactions is incredibly concerning.

Once again for the peanut gallery, if you don’t care about any of that and are just having a good time with it, at least be mindful of the work and expense a large group of people have gone through to acquire and present the content you’re all too eager to exploit for cheap thrills. Some of us do actually care and are not exactly comfortable with the fact that others don’t seem to care about burning it all to the ground. We can’t force you to listen or behave as we’d hope you might, but at least be aware of the potential consequences of your actions. All we’re asking is for you to not be the douchebag who sets the whole neighborhood on fire with your illegal fireworks display. Is that too much to ask for? more on that in a second, first... a psa)

-If you see a script for sale and are unsure if it’s legit (or believe it might already be freely available in our collection), please feel free to ask us for advice. Our goal is to make as much of our fandom history available to the entire fandom, and we absolutely do not want anyone shelling out money for stuff you can already find for free.

(seriously, we’ve seen a bunch of resellers cropping up selling printed versions of the scripts we bought and uploaded for everyone to enjoy free of charge, or scripts that are otherwise of dubious origin. We’ve been at this for years now and know what’s actually out there. We don’t want anyone to fall for a scam if we can help it)

-Also, the usual reminder that the scripts we acquire ARE NOT NECESSARILY THE FINAL SHOOTING DRAFTS. In fact, the majority of scripts in our collection are NOT. Changes are made daily to scripts, even during filming. Comparing a Production Draft (white pages, effectively the first “final draft” of what usually becomes a series of drafts before filming wraps) to a much later revision (say... green or goldenrod revisions, several of which we DO have in our collection for comparison) and how those earlier drafts often differ wildly from the aired version versus how similar a much later green draft is to the aired version, for example, can teach you a lot about the television writing process. The link above to the superwiki scripts page has a nice little explainer about how this process works.

Differences between our posted scripts (many of which are white drafts, aka FIRST complete drafts, which will likely go through multiple rounds of revisions before filming even begins) and the aired version of the show are not all “acting choices” or a director or editor just cutting whole scenes on a whim. It’s insulting to everyone involved in production to suggest that’s the case.

(and yeah, fine... whatever, make any sort of posts you like regarding how those changes came about, but at the very least understand that it’s not actually the truth about how any of this works. Don’t care that that’s not the truth and want to make the posts anyway because shitposting is fun and that’s the extent of your sense of humor? FINE! You’re entitled to do that! But at least you DO know the truth now, and hopefully so do the people who engage with your posts. Deliberate ignorance isn’t cute, smooth lions notwithstanding)

There’s probably a whole other post to be made on fandom tagging etiquette, but again I don’t really use the tags enough to know what’s going on with that whole situation. I’ve also probably left a lot of stuff out, so please feel free to add things I’ve overlooked.

Thanks also to @trisscar368 and @thayerkerbasy for help compiling this, too. They were kind enough to escort me through the park to feed these pigeons. Now I need to take them out for ice cream. :’D

So I guess welcome to the neighborhood. Make yourself at home, but like... try not to trash the place while you’re here. Some of us live here by choice, lol.

#this blue hellsite (affectionate)#fandom problems #kinda wish i'd made this post six months ago but here we are i guess lol #long post #now edited for the people who are actually personally invested in the fandom #thanks for participating in this little experiment and I hope this version is actually informative to those who are interested #meaning there's a lot more links to stuff and explainers and whatnot...#and one last reminder that for folks just swinging through for laughs absolutely none of this applies to you #if you are legit interested in fandom history and preservation as we move to the post-canon world then hopefully this is useful to you

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amjustagirl · 3 years

Text

Chapters: one. ~ two. ~ three. ~ four. ~ five. ~ six. ~ seven. ~ eight.

Word Count: 2.3k

Summary: Being with Miya Atsumu is like chasing a storm - equal parts exhilaration and danger. After all, it’s impossible to tame a storm.

Notes: Multipart fic, slow burn. Updates to come soon (and dw, fic’s completed, so you won’t be left hanging ^^)

Masterlist here

AO3 Link here

‘You sure you want the job?’ Miya Osamu asks her when she turns up at his shop, application in hand, responding to the advertisement in Onigiri Miya’s window for part time staff - general help needed, ability to ride a scooter a plus point - it had read.

There are only fifteen seats in Onigiri Miya, and hardly any space for her to fit her backpack between her knees, but sunlight streams in invitingly from the glass shop front and there is a faint smell of grilled rice and fried fish that reminds her of weekly lunches at her grandparents’ home.

‘Yes’, she answers, gesturing with her thumb at her scooter parked outside the shop. ‘I think I’m a good fit for this job’. The corner of Miya Osamu’s mouth lifts ever so slightly, and he leans forward in his seat, hand extended to her.

‘Welcome to Onigiri Miya then’, he says before proceeding to brisk walk her through the ins and outs of the shop, the scope of her responsibilities, work schedule and (most importantly) her wage, leaving her head spinning at the end of the impromptu briefing. Miya Osamu seems passionate about his craft, his face brightening up with enthusiasm when he talks her through the various onigiris he sells, the type of rice he buys (from a boutique rice farmer in Hyogo, apparently), and he’s generous enough to offer her a decent wage, more than what she could be making working in a combini.

She stands by her bike on the roadside, tilting her face to the setting sun. There is the faintest smell of rain in the air.

She soon falls into the rhythm of Onigiri Miya.

Osamu is strangely territorial over food preparation, so her tasks in the kitchen are mainly limited to washing rice (thrice in clean water, drained thoroughly) and doling out cups of tea and bowls of soup. When he finds out that she’s studying accountancy at Osaka University, he immediately places her in charge of the cash register (and later, in charge of their books). Her scooter comes in handy when he needs her to do urgent stock runs or deliveries to customers.

She learns the name of their regular customers - Abe-san, who only ever orders salmon onigiris with a side of pork bone soup. Kawasaki-san, who spends half her meal complaining about her aches and pains to a sympathetic Osamu. Mina-san, who turns up every day for breakfast after Osamu includes spam onigiri on his menu after he overhears that she misses her hometown of Okinawa.

Osamu calls her over at the end of her shift on a busy Saturday night. ‘I’ve a large order for an old customer of mine. D’you think you could help deliver it?’

There is a gleam in his eye that she does not quite like.

‘You sound like you’re sending me out to slaughter’ she comments half-jokingly, to which he responds with an amused shrug of his shoulder. She considers whether it’s bad form to throw her shoe at her boss’s head, but decides not to waste her time. So she shoulders the large sack of food, heading off on her scooter to a neat apartment building in a quiet neighbourhood.

Well – it would have been a quiet neighbourhood but for the music blasted from the top floor of her destination. She has to cover her ears the minute the elevator opens and wonders if their neighbours are deaf or dead because there is no way otherwise the apartment wouldn’t have copped a noise complaint. Grimacing at the tape over the doorbell, she knocks politely on the door.

There is no response.

She knocks once more, less politely this time, but still the door does not open. ‘Hello, your delivery is here!’ she calls firmly, slamming her fist down on the sturdy wooden door.

There is still no response.

She’s about to turn around when the door crashes open and a blonde head pops out. Her jaw falls open because standing before her is the spitting image of her boss that just sent her out with this order, albeit blonde and ever so slightly broader.

‘You’re not ‘Samu, but you’re pretty’, he leers, leaning against the doorway.

She’s tempted to deck him but she’s pretty sure that would mean losing her job. So reminding herself that all that’s standing between her and her bed is this delivery, she bites her tongue and extends the bag of food to him. ‘Your order, sir. Payment please.’

‘Didn’t ‘Samu mention that I don’t need to pay?’ The blonde Osamu replica tugs the bag of food towards him, frowning when she refuses to let go.

‘Not that I know of - and I can’t let you have your order unless you pay for it’, she answers firmly, foot against the door.

He straightens into his height in a thinly veiled attempt to intimidate her - and while he’s at least six foot of solid muscle from what she can see, it’s thanks to years of working in her father’s shop with men at least a full head taller and broader than her that she’s not afraid to tip her chin up at him with her widest, sharpest grin until he looks away to draw out a couple of thousand yen bills from his pocket, enough to cover the bill.

‘Fine, fine - tell ‘Samu he wins’, he grumbles, slamming the door in her face.

She waits until she’s back at her scooter and a good distance away from the apartment before she dials Osamu’s number.

‘What was that?’ she asks without preamble when he picks up.

‘What was what?’ Osamu answers, sounding uncharacteristically amused.

‘Don’t play cute with me! Did you just make me deliver food to your brother?’

‘My twin actually’, and he ignores her squawk of indignation. ’Did he pay up?’

‘What do you take me for - of course! I didn’t let go of the food until he did.’

‘Huh’, Osamu responds, sounding surprised. ‘That’s the first time he actually gave in’. And with that, he laughs merrily and hangs up on her.

She shrugs it off as one of her boss’s weird quirks.

Except it doesn’t stop as being a weird quirk but turns into an annoying habit.

Atsumu quickly becomes a regular customer (she learns during one of the twins’ many bickering sessions that he’s back in Osaka after several competitions), and Osamu latches on pretty fast that she’s far better than he is at forcing Atsumu to pay for the food he eats, so he sics her on Atsumu every time the blonde setter shows up at the shop for a meal.

‘Pay up’ she orders Atsumu for the fourth time this week. Her tone gives no berth for refusal so Atsumu reaches for his pockets even as he grumbles his complaints about ‘cowardly scrubs’ and ‘ crazy bitches’ at a grinning Osamu.

‘You should give me a raise for managing your brother’, she complains to Osamu later, and though he raises an eyebrow at her, to her surprise, he does exactly that.

Osamu proceeds to take advantage of said raise to send her to man their stand at MSBY’s first match of the season, armed with a few hundred onigiris. Business is brisk, but she finds her attention diverted by the sheer speed of the plays and the way the players all seem to have wings in their feet.

Atsumu in particular catches her eye. Osamu explained to her over a slow day at work about volleyball positions and basic plays, and he boasted about Atsumu’s talent as a setter, how ‘he always takes the best care of his spikers’. Watching him now, even to her untrained eye, she can see how much thought he puts into each of his plays - the way he tricks the blockers to let his spikers fly high above them, the quick side stepping of increasingly frustrated attackers, the dump shots at the most unexpected of times.

She’s impressed, though she doesn’t want to admit it - because Atsumu has the personality of a puddle of muddy rainwater, and she's fairly sure he'd never let her hear the end of it if he ever finds out.

So it isn’t surprising when she spots him being hassled by a large gaggle of his fan girls outside the sports hall. They’re hanging off his arms begging him for autographs - and probably something much less innocent from the way his eyes are bugging out of his head. It’s tempting to walk away from him – it’s not as if he’s been particularly nice to her after all, but a few of the more rabid fan girls seem to get a little too close for comfort and she figures even he doesn’t deserve that . Plus he probably can’t just shove them off because that might cause yet another PR debacle that she and Osamu have become accustomed seeing in the news, so she breathes a sigh through her nose, cursing her conscience.

‘Oi asshat, your ride’s here’, she shouts as loudly as she can, shouldering her way to the center of the crowd. His fan girls stare in stunned silence, but Atsumu catches on after she shoves her spare helmet into his chest, and grabbing her wrist for dear life, they sprint all the way to her scooter.

‘Don’t tell me you’ve never ridden before’, she snaps as he fiddles helplessly at his helmet.

‘Of course, I have, what d’you take me for, some scrub?’ he retorts when he manages to strap his it on to his head. Her scooter groans under his weight.

Yes - she itches to retort, because he’s clearly lying. He fights to keep upright as she loops her way through bends on the road and maintains a white knuckled grip on the back of his seat until she comes to a stop two streets away where his fan girls are unlikely to see him.

‘So, where to?’ she asks him as he wheezes, trying to catch his breath. ‘I could let you off here, or we could grab some food - your choice.’

‘Eh… Could we drop by 7-11?’ he chuckles sheepishly.

‘Really? You want me to take you to a combini when your brother literally owns a restaurant?’

‘I’m cravin’ an egg mayo sandwich, what’s wrong with that?!’ he yells as she revs off, and she laughs when he squeaks and clings on to her waist.

They end up at a combini anyway. Atsumu buys his egg mayo sandwich. And a bucket load of oden. And a bagful of karaage. And two pudding cups (singly packed, none of the triple cup kind for him thank you very much). At least he steers clear of the onigiri section, because Osamu might explode otherwise if he ever finds out.

‘You’re paying the fine if my bike gets impounded’ she tells him sourly.

‘Relax - it’ll be fine’, he waves his hand airily at her. ‘’Sides, what’s a girl like you doing with a bike?’

‘A girl like me?’ she echoes, tilting her head in confusion.

‘Y’know - kinda square and all? I assumed so, since ‘Samu mentioned you’re studying to be an accountant’, he clarifies through a mouthful of food.

‘Square?! ’ she mouths at him, outraged, and he grins unrepentantly back at her, crunching on karaage. She abandons her annoyance to scoot back to avoid the ensuing spray of crumbs.

‘Do you want me to answer seriously, or was that a rhetorical question, gross pig?’

‘Please, I’m always serious, darlin’, he drawls.

She steals a fishcake from him in retaliation and he tries to rap her knuckles with his sandwich. They only settle down when the combini staff glare at them mildly in reproof.

‘I’ve always wanted to ride a bike ‘cos it seemed like it allowed its rider to be free’, she says, shooting a fond look through the window at her own scooter, rusty and old it may be.

‘I mean it allows you to get from one place to another, what’s so special about that?’ he asks, cocking his head in confusion.

‘Mm…well, not just that. You see, when I was younger, I used to be so jealous of my older brothers getting to ride their motorbikes. They refused to let me borrow it, so I stole it one day when they weren’t looking and took off - but because I was so excited, I hit the thrusters so hard on the way up a hill that I ended up crashing on the way down. But right before I crashed, there was a moment when I was on the top of the world with the wind in my face - it was the first time I truly felt alive .’

She closes her eyes at the memory, her mouth lifting into a smile. ‘And that’s what I become addicted to - chasing that feeling of being completely unfettered from the world, like a bird in the sky.

He stares at her meditatively, as though she’s a puzzle he can’t quite solve.

‘What!’ she exclaims, the tips of her ears flushing pink, suddenly self-conscious.

‘Nothin’, darlin’. Just thought that you’re more interesting than I thought’. Ignoring her indignant ‘ what?!’ , he stands up, brushing the crumbs off his lap. ‘Shall we get goin’? It’s about to rain.’

The ride back to his apartment passes in a blur of streetlights and gathering rain clouds, but thankfully it’s not as unpleasant as it was before as Atsumu eases into his seat, moving with her when she drops into a bend, loosening his hands on her waist. Still, she suspects it’s all bravado, as he stumbles stiff legged off the bike when they reach his apartment.

But as to be expected from a seasoned athlete used to the spotlight, he manages to plaster on a grin, cocky and charming enough to make her blush.

‘Thanks for the ride’, he says. ‘I wouldn’t mind coming out again with you for a ride sometime’.

Then he smiles at her, and it’s soft, shorn of the sharp edges she’s used to seeing. It plants an unfamiliar seed of warmth in her core that survives her race home against the storm.

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ditttiii · 4 years

Text

Brothers Conflict || 04.

Thrust into an already established family, you struggle to find your footing while dodging the advances of seven, incredibly good looking stepbrothers.

Your father marrying, and you suddenly having to live under the same roof with seven step brothers was a royal mess or so you had thought, Because them falling in love with you was so much worse. Or was it?

◈ Genre: Romance, Fluff, Humor, Smut and a little angst. (PG-18)(step brother AU) (I do NOT support incest, this work is inspired by the popular anime/manga Brothers Conflict)

◈ Pairings: OT7 x Reader (reverse harem)

◈ CHAPTER FOUR

Word Count: 4.2k

Warnings: Language (sfw)

Masterlist (all chapters will be exclusively linked here)

A/N: (Reuploading this because Tumblr decided to screw me over and kill my chapter link for some reason. i am crying for all those lost comments and re-blogs. Thank you tumblr for once again reinforcing the point home that you truly do not give a shit about any of your users. If you had previously left a re-blog, comment I am so sorry I couldn’t reply to it :” i m heartbroken & crying)

surprise! surprise! didn’t think i’d be updating this one did ya? heh. This update goes out to every single person that voted for B.C and left the nicest comments and feedback. ETMY is a monster of a fic, both plot and popularity wise, so it isn’t really a surprise that B.C lost the poll, but I was still blown away by the amount of people who wanted to see B.C first. ETMY and Kintsugi from now on will be on my regular rotation, but every now and then I’ll try my best to update B.C too. This update is a promise of that. Thank-you and I hope you enjoy this one ❤

‘You are such a wuss.’

Your brain supplies unhelpfully. It’s not like you don’t already know that, but of course, your conscience felt the need to rub it in, make sure that it really sinks in, that you fully realize the fact that you just bawled your eyes out in front of your family.

Family, a word familiar to many somehow feels strange to you.

You know that their eyes are on you, can feel them boring into you, looking—seeking—for answers, or maybe they are just filled with concern.

You don’t know and for once, you can’t bring yourself to care either.

‘I am so tired.’

You think from where your face is still nestled in the comforting warmth of Hoseok’s neck, one of his hands is around your shoulders, rubbing your arm in a comforting gesture while his chin rests on the crown of your head. It feels nice, you decide. Like having a warm blanket wrapped around you, except the blanket has a steady heartbeat, and it moves and gives comfort hugs.

Yeah.

“You’ll be okay, trust me. We’ll figure things out y/n. You are not alone in this okay? I am here for you, we are all here for you.” Hoseok stresses the “all” and you think back to when Seokjin did the same a few minutes ago.

“Us”, “all”—it’s as though they are trying to show their support, all of their support, and yet you can’t help but think of the younger brothers.

Jungkook and Taehyung. Two of your seven brothers.

Should they really be using words like us and all when two of the seven hate you? Abhor your very presence? Even without looking up you know that the two scrapes of chairs sliding against the floor you had heard a few minutes ago belonged to the two of them.

‘Whatever, I don’t care,’ you reason with yourself, but it’s obvious even to you that it’s a lie. You care. You just wish you didn’t.

Breathing in one last time the soothing fragrance of Hoseok’s cologne, you finally raise your head. Eyes still lowered, you move to wipe your tears away but the visible tremble of your hands makes you pause. You feel naked, vulnerable, like all your wounds are out in the open to see, to prod, and you hate it.

Abruptly dropping your hands and stuffing them in between your clenched thighs, you cough, clearing your throat and putting on your best smile. It feels fake, the stretch of your lips stings and looking at the unconvinced faces of your brothers around you, you know that they can see your chipped facade too. But you still don’t drop the smile, and with a bow of your head, you thank Seokjin for the food and move to stand up.

“Um, I feel a little drained. It has been a long day with all the unpacking, and I think I am gonna retire a little early tonight. Thank you so much for welcoming me and...” you trail off at a clear loss of words but Namjoon swoops in and helps you out by reassuring, “It’s all right y/n-ah. I am sure you are tired, please let me walk you to your room, just give me a minute okay?” His eyes are earnest, soft, warm and you blink, surprised but nod nonetheless, “Sure.”

Internally wincing at how painfully awkward you sound, you move to help them clear the table but Yoongi stops you, placing his hand over yours, he gently takes the plate from your hands with a soft, “I’ve got it,” and moves to the kitchen. You stand there in the middle of the large dining room, wringing your hands, and biting your lip. It’s all so foreign, and you can’t decide if you like it or not. You are so used to cooking dinner every night and eating it alone by yourself because your dad was very rarely home, that this feels different, alien. Twenty-four hours ago, you were still in your modest two-floored home, surrounded by the comforting and familiar warmth of your kitchen eating instant ramen out of a cup because you were too tired to cook, and because all your kitchen utensils were packed, ready to be moved out.

Twenty-four hours later though you are standing in the dining room of a mansion that is easily four times the size of your home, and it’s disconcerting.

“Alright, I’m done,” Namjoon calls from where he is entering the dining room, a bottle of water in his hands which he passes to you once he is close, “It’s room temperature, I can swap it for cold water if that’s what you prefer?”

The gesture is simple, it’s just him passing you a bottle of water in case you feel thirsty during the night, but it’s again so alien, and you’re not used to this. It’s a divergence from what you consider routine—filling your own bottle with fresh tap water every night before going to sleep—and you can’t help how it leaves you feeling off-kilter, unsure as to what you should do next.

Your manners thankfully kick in, maybe a second too late, but you accept it with a soft thankyou regardless, not wanting to seem rude and offend Namjoon.

Much like they had all been doing ever since you had first stepped foot into their home (now your home too), Namjoon politely didn’t call you out on your skittishness and instead with a smile fell into step beside you.

Your grip around the bottle tightens as an uncomfortable silence cloaks the two of you and you bite the inside of your cheek, mind racing to think of something to say, something to fill in the awkward void of silence that the two of you are stuck in, but every plausible route of conversation sounds forced to your ears, and you can’t help it when your frustration with yourself rises by the second.

Apparently your brain is now incapable of small talk. Fantastic.

You don’t even realise you are grumbling out loud until Namjoon calls out your name, “y/n? Everything okay? Did you say something?”

Your head swivels to look at him so quickly you almost get a whiplash before you continue the—by now—long standing tradition of being tongue tied in the presence of your new family and say, “Huh?”

Ah, Eloquent as always.

Despite his best attempt at masking his worry, some of it still seeps through in the furrow of his brows and the way the edges of his lips turn down in a tiny worried frown—the sight of which has pure, thick guilt pooling instantly into the pit of your stomach.

Worrying them is the last thing you want to do, it hasn’t even been a day and the burden of being a bother sits heavy on your shoulders. Family for you for the longest time has just been you and your dad, the two of you forming a patchwork of a family, filling multiple roles at the same time.

Papa.

The man is your dad, mom, sibling, hell your damn best friend; and there isn’t anything you would not do for him and his happiness. As unwilling as you had initially been, (and still are) the simple fact of the matter is that seeing papa in love, seeing him happy, content and for once not worrying about you or going on a crazy death adventure is nice. Safe.

More often than not he wasn’t home, and the trips he went on were dangerous and you had always lived in the fear of one day having police knock on your door with the news that your father was dead.

He is all you have and when he was home, he made up for his lack of presence and you were okay with how things were. Well mostly okay, but you weren’t about to let those thoughts cloud your head again. Papa gave you his all, or as much of him as he could and you weren’t going to be an ungrateful brat. You were lucky to have him as your father and you wouldn’t—shouldn't forget that.

‘For papa,’ you decide. For papa you need to do better, try harder, put more of an effort into accepting your new family. You now have seven brothers whether you like it or not, that’s a fact, so you need to pull on your big girl pants and accept it.

It’s with that thought in mind that you put on your best, brightest smile, look Namjoon in the eye, and open your mouth to reassure him, “Me? I am good! Never been better! How are you?”

…

God—fucking—dammit.

The furrow between Namjoon’s brows deepens, and you remind yourself to go bang your head on the nearest wall as soon as you are alone.

Sensing the need to do some damage control you let out an awkward laugh, which, looking at Namjoon’s expression, did not help matters. At all.

Coughing, you clear your throat before you stop in front of your bedroom door. Rising on the balls of your feet, you twist the cap of the bottle in your hands to expend some nervous energy, thus keeping your hands occupied and killing the possibility of awkward, flailing limbs. Right you are in college, you know how to speak English, you’ve got this.

Do. Not. Be. Weird.

Honesty here we go.

“Nam...joon-oppa,” you start, soft, a little hesitant and unsure but determined to push through. “I..this isn’t easy for me. I am not gonna stand here and lie anymore because I want to give this...us...a chance, I just,” you huff finally turning to look Namjoon in the eye, “I don’t know how to?”

The furrow between Namjoon’s brows stays but his eyes are swimming with sympathy, understanding and more than anything else clear of any speck of judgement, and above all that is what encourages you, pushes you to plow on, “It’s not that I don’t want to be a part of this family, or well atleast I am not entirely against the idea of it. I..” your words break off as you pause, biting your lower lip as you try to decide how much you are comfortable sharing with Namjoon.

“I just need time. This is too much, too soon. I’ve never had this you know?” you gesture to the surrounding space, a long hallway with multiple doors spaced far apart from each other, the rooms inside lived in by family who less than twenty four hours ago were strangers to you.

“It’s not that I hate this or any of you, if that’s what you think. The reason I..cried..um is because of how overwhelming all of this is, I am trying but it’s just hard and I am so sorr—”

“Y/n, you don’t have to explain anything,” Namjoon breaks you off, one of his hands rising to engulf yours from where it’s still gripping the bottle. His grip is loose, barely a touch of skin but coupled with his one sided small dimpled smile and soft eyes, it makes something in your chest tighten. Like a fist clenched too tight around it, and you can’t say anything for a moment, confused by your feelings, yet comforted by the warmth around your hands.

Blinking, you finally snap out of whatever trace you had gotten lost in. “No, but I do. I...you all have been nothing but nice and welcoming to me, yet all I have done is cry and make it seem like—”

“No,” Namjoon interrupts you again, halting you from wording your faults like he had before. Hours later, when you think back to this moment you’ll realise he never once let you take the blame for anything but in this moment, confused and tired, the realisation slips past you.

“y/n, I understand. I may not know exactly how you feel right now, but I do have a vague idea and I understand that it can’t be easy. As nice as it would be to just fall into a routine and be one big happy family, the reality of the matter is that it just doesn’t work like that. And I get it. So do the others. Take as much time as you need to get comfortable, nobody here expects anything from you. We’ll take whatever you give us and be glad for it. Trust, company, love, whatever that may be,” Namjoon speaks with confidence, like he truly believes his words and somehow that’s enough to make you smile. It’s not a big grin, it’s barely an upturn of your lips, the edges curling in a way that they just barely no longer resemble a straight line or a downturn frown, but one look at it has Namjoon grinning.

His lips curling into a glossy, dimpled grin, dark brown eyes turning into two happy crescent moons, high cheekbones glistening under a thin sheen of sweat and oil, and the sight of him has something warm gripping your already tight heart.

Head lowering to allow your hair to curtain your face, you let slip a tiny grin of your own, biting your lip to stop it from spreading too wide. Hesitating for only a second, you move before you can wuss your way out, hands slipping around Namjoon’s waist, your cheek lands on his shoulder, before your eyes fall shut and you hug.

If Namjoon is surprised, he hides it well because his hands loop around your back just as quickly. Strong arms curling and encompassing you in an unfamiliar but protective embrace, and you smile, lips curling against the soft cotton of his t-shirt.

“Thank you, I am bad with words but I hope you know that I appreciate you saying that. Like a lot.”

Namjoon huffs out a laugh, the strands at the nape of your neck tickling in response to the puff of breath, “I get it y/n-ah, believe it or not most of us do.”

You hum, the words going unregistered in your brain as you greedily soak up the warmth and affection Namjoon so easily provides. Maybe you are being too forward, too affectionate too fast, maybe you don’t have the right to take his affection when you can’t give them all yours, but cocooned under his warm, tender love you can’t bring yourself to care. Not right now. Not when you finally have someone to hug, to be comforted by, to be protected by—to be loved by.

Your bond with them is new and fragile, but it has potential. It has the potential to someday bloom and grow, the potential to tie you all together as a family and your lonely, aching soul desires it, craves it so bad that it hurts.

Feelings a jumbled mess, most of you is still hesitant to fully let them in, to allow yourself to feel too familiar because you know that the only reason they are being nice to you is because they have to be. The marriage of their mother to your father put them under that obligation and you get that, you do. You aren’t harboring any delusional beliefs about them loving you like they love each other, or like they would their sister; the not step kind.

You get it.

The reality is a bitter pillow to swallow, but it’s the truth and it’s with that sombre realisation that you tighten your arms around Namjoon one last time, before you detach yourself and step away. Maybe you won’t have all of their love, and maybe you’ll never be as close to them as they are to each other, but maybe you don’t have to be. It’ll be fine, you’ll carve out a little niche for yourself, and that will be enough.

It will have to be.

“Is your room okay? Jin picked the bookshelf, bed and well most of it out, but we can go shopping tomorrow if you would rather have something different,” Namjoon offers, hands inside his pockets as he slouches, tall frame curling inwards so that he can still look you in the eye.

You smile, the small action and effort on his part warming your heart, “It’s perfect, I am in love with it. The curtains, not gonna lie, I hope to dear lord, they never fall on me because I am pretty sure they can suffocate me to my grave,” you snort, joking.

Chuckling Namjoon rubs the end of his nose seemingly a little embarrassed, “Yeah, Jin hates the sun hitting his face first thing in the morning, so the entire house has them.”

“Ah, and someone still chose glass for walls?” you ask amused.

“Taehyung can be...adamant at times,” he trails off.

Humming you nod in reply, reluctant to talk about the youngest brothers. Feeling a yawn coming, you cover your mouth with the back of your hand, eyes squinting as drowsiness sweeps through your body.

“Well, that’s my cue to leave,” Namjoon says, stepping back.

“Sorry about that, I'm usually not this big of a royal mess,” you say, figure growing slack against the hardwood of your bedroom door.

Exaggeratedly biting back a grin, Namjoon nods with an over the top agreeing face, “Of course, absolutely. Uh-huh.”

Snorting you turn on your heels, “Good night oppa!”

A chuckle and a ‘G’night y/n-ah,’ greets your ears, before the slam of your bedroom door rings in the quiet of the room and silence cloaks you again.

Sighing you slip out your phone from the back pocket of your jeans, turning on the screen and groan when you see how late it is. Sunmi, unless out partying, would usually go to bed early. She'd more often than not cite the some old reason, something along the lines of dark circles and dull skin, which you don’t have to worry about since your skin isn’t nearly as nice anyway.

Too much effort too.

Biting your lip, you stand there debating whether to take a shower or not. Usually you prefer taking one before going to bed, but today has been a grinder of a day and you think you deserve a free pass.

Cracking your neck, you finally conclude a shower to be too much work, and with one long, stretched out yawn, fall onto your bed face first.

God this smells divine.

Internally making a note to find out what detergent they use, you snuggle into the warmth of your comforter and finally let the tug of sleep pull you under.

When you wake up, it’s to a scratchy, parched throat and a mild throbbing ache behind your eyes. Wincing, you push your face deeper into the comforter, cursing your past self to the deepest, darkest pits of hell for forgetting to close the curtains before falling asleep.

The harsh glare of the morning sun feels scorching hot against the back of your neck, and you twist your head to scowl at the window only to regret that decision very, very quickly.

Right, big windows. Fuck me.

Retinas burned, you stumble out of the bed and somehow manage to make your way to the bathroom half blind. Any other day you’d take your time to admire the lavish and gorgeous bathroom (now yours), but the ache behind your eyes is steadily growing and the urge to dip it under a stream of steady, lukewarm water is too strong to be pushed aside.

Stripping yourself off the day old clothes, you sigh in bliss when the water hits your aching, sore muscles. Cool enough to feel refreshing, but warm enough to not make you shiver, your body goes lax, muscles loosening as you watch the water glide down your body and into the drain.

Picking a random body wash from the assortment of products lining the wall, you open the top and take a whiff off it, barely holding in the moan of pure bliss when the fruity, sweet fragrance of green apple and honey wafts upto your nose.

God bless whoever chose this.

You take your time scrubbing; soaping up the luffa with soft, lazy strokes and letting it caress your skin softly. With your college being off, you have all the time in the world at your leisure, or well as much of it as you could, with the looming cloud of interacting and spending time with your new family rumbling over your head.

Today’s goal: Don’t trip. That’s it.

You stay submerged in the tub until the ends of your fingers grow wrinkled and your body feels loose. Getting dressed, however, is comparatively a much quicker affair. A simple olive green full sleeved tee paired with slim fit black jeans, you choose to let your hair dry naturally and just let them be. The collar of your tee grows a little wet with every passing second but you still can’t be bothered to dry your hair.

The bedroom door softly clicks close behind you and you bite your lip, torn between going off to explore on your own and going down to meet whoever was up and about.

Rising on the balls of your feet, you twist your neck to look around the long hallway around you. Stretched far wide and long, the last door seems a little too far away, the space a little too huge for a home. It reminds you more of a hotel hallway, clean and silent, people locked behind their bedroom doors, uncaring of what’s happening outside. You know that’s not the case here, or at least you hope it isn’t.

Your slippers almost feel a little too cheap to be touching the polished, expensive, white flooring and you huff, the constant barrage of insecurities, by now, a continuous annoying hum in the back of your mind.

Even with seven other men living under the same big roof, you see neither hide nor hair of any of them as the morning sunlight streams inside and creates a gentle, luminescent glow all across the floor. The green of the leaves seems brighter, somehow crisper and it’s only when you lean closer to take a look that you realise the soil is wet with tiny drops of water splattered across the leaves.

Huh, someone watered them not too long ago.

You don’t find anyone on the floor below so you can’t help but wonder who it was. Whichever one of your seven brothers was responsible for the insane amount of indoor plants, clearly took his responsibility seriously. Not a single leaf was yellow or anything less than a gleaming, fresh green. It’s the meticulous nature of the job done that makes you question whether instead of one of your seven step brothers, if maybe it was a gardener's job.

Nodding in approval of your theory, you chalk it up to being the work of a gardener and move to brew yourself some coffee. One glance at your phone and suddenly it makes sense why you hadn’t bumped into anyone yet. Rudely awoken by harsh sunlight streaming in from a too large window, what you hadn’t realised before was how early it still is. Barely 7 am on a weekend of all days, it’s no surprise you are the only one walking around.

You pick up your mug after pouring in a generous amount of sugar, and make your way to the garden outside. You hadn’t gotten a chance to explore yesterday, but you decide to do it today. If you’re going to live in a mansion, then you’re going to do it without a map on your phone dammit. You are a smart bitch.

Most of the time at least.

Pushing open the sliding door, you take your slippers off, humming when you feel the cool wood under your feet. The early morning sun rises from behind you, and the soft rays bath the vast open space ahead of you in a pretty, shimmery gold.

Neatly trimmed grass stretches far ahead of you, rows upon rows of bright, gorgeous flowers blooming on either side of the stretch of paved pathway and spread ahead in neat, planned lanes. From a glance you identify roses, jasmines, camellias and a bunch of other flowering plants, spread amongst many other exotic looking ones. You definitely haven't seen most of them before.

Even you, as reluctant as you were and in some ways still are to call this place your home, can agree that the house is absolutely gorgeous. Built with rolling hills and mountains forming the backdrop, the location could not have been more scenic. The place truly does look like heaven on Earth, and your breath catches somewhere low in your chest when a breeze brings the sweet fragrance of jasmine to you.

This is perfect.

“What are you doing here?”

Or it was.

A/N: leave me a comment, &/or a re-blog if you liked this, they go such much farther in supporting content creators and just make us really happy.

idek reuploading this and loosing all those notes, comments, reblogs. god idk what to say i m just so heartbroken rn.

If you would like to be tagged, the tag list can be found (here)

Tag-list (prior to this reupload) : @angelic-lawyer @favsssxx @imluckybitches @nomimits7 @alex4243 @calling-dips-on-j-hope @joonsinnerchild @iconicgguk @untamedfaith @kaheryn @nottodayjjk @moments-of-melancholy@gee-nee @confusemonkey @beautyyounggirl @blossoming-cherrytrees @seoul9711 @btsismybiass @ditttiii-2 @sugakookie0698 @maboiisuga @kurohas-world@namseokiesmoonv @kerikaaria @chiidbits @girlyyzzyz@loveyoongles @btsfeelzies @knjkitten @honeyspillings@thestrugglesofateenagedirtbag @starrykook97 @xanny91@leilalago @jiminie-08 @voguejoonie @lovelikeyouwant @pars-ley @zingapinga @calling-dips-on-j-hope @ghostkat23 @moments-of-melancholy @i-like-puppy-mg @clarissalance @moon-2seok @btsnatalena @minetticatinwonderland @uniquekindofgirl @supertweetycherry @backinblack1967 @darkstar676 @chatsgotmytongue @booklover240 @topthis808 @ireallylikeyourwriting@ @namjoonsslutakakoreanman @embrace-themagic @samararose21 @rkivemagic @hanseggroll @jinniekook @lustforbangtan @lunette-solaris @endlesslyinlovewbts @lyrxbz @xxlurkina @meep-meep @catsandstrawberries @ungodlyjoon

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5uptic · 3 years

Text

crewfu: fanfic spotlight!

We work together by Anonymous (5up & DK, unrated, gen | 248 words)

Summary: One likes plants and baking, the other loves to create and design video games. They stay up and create monstrosities together, it's their fun, it's their favourite game. Aka a 5up and Dk roommate au!

No matter how life tangles, I’m still here with you. by hungryandsleepy (5up/Steve, general rating, m/m | 279 words)

Summary: 5up has been working so hard on his new map, and of course, he needs someone to give him a motivation to go to sleep.

objectively pretty by vesque (5up/Steve, general rating, m/m | 462 words)

Summary: steve is drunk. he's pretty sure 5up is too. that doesn't mean being called pretty is any less momentuous.

you plus me by mangoedges (5up/Steve, teen rating, m/m | 489 words)

Summary: 5up and Steve meet.

he said to me by mangoedges (5up/Steve, teen rating, m/m | 656 words)

Summary: 5up and Steve share a moment.

by the snowmen by mangoedges (5up/Steve, teen rating, m/m | 670 words)

Summary: Steve has a moment when it's all over.

today you got to know me (a little bit too slowly) by runninohhoney (5up/Steve, teen rating, m/m | 675 words)

Summary: Steve lights up a cigarette. 5up doesn't smoke.

what would it take by mangoedges (5up/Steve, teen rating, m/m | 787 words)

Summary: It's Steve's first mission. He hecks up. Or does he?

sorta cute by floweruru (5up/Steve, unrated, m/m | 822 words)

Summary: ‘I wouldn’t do that,’ he said. ‘That’s just disrespectful,’ he said. Yet there was 5up, crushed like a can in Steve’s embrace, feebly kicking at nothing as his feet leave the pavement.

i was gonna kill u, but ur kinda cute?? by Cthulhuer (5up/Steve, general rating, m/m | 1k words)

Summary: Steve is a mess and 5up is worse.

I hear a Symphony by AwkwardAce (5up/Fundy, unrated, m/m | 1.1k words)

Summary: He exhaled until his lungs ached for air, fingers twitching as he opted to remove the sleek white gloves he wore in a feeble effort to soothe himself. It didn’t work. He wrung his trembling hands together as his eyes raked down the worn leather case taking in the doodles- some etched some drawn- across the faded surface. He snapped the buckles open and his breath hitched, catching in his already tight throat. For a moment the world span, his head throbbed and he wanted nothing more than to run and hide. 5up breathed out slowly, shakily.

staring by lytriis (5up/Steve, teen rating, m/m | 1.1k words)

Summary: steve asks 5up out. 5up doesn’t know how to respond.

and it's four am, and yet, you're here by vesque (5up/Steve, general rating, m/m | 1.2k words)

Summary: in which steve shows up at 5up's house, in the middle of the night, completely spontaneously

more than this by mangoedges (5up/Steve, teen rating, m/m | 1.2k words)

Summary: Steve catches 5up venting.

3:15 by vesque (5up/Steve, general rating, m/m | 1.2k words)

Summary: Steve tries to guess Five's name. It's much more difficult than he anticipated.

things were different by fourpebbles (Apollo/Steve, teen rating, m/m | 1.5k words)

Summary: His eyes circled around to his friends, Kimi and Janet engaging in pleasant comversation, sleepy and becoming increasingly more sober. He looked, finally, across him, and caught Dumbdog staring at him. What now bro, what did this guy want. small talk, turns into not small talk, then there's no talk

Once Upon A Dream by SmearedWords (5up/Steve, teen rating, m/m | 1.5k words)

Summary: 5up looks ethereal, while Steve is struggling to breathe. "You're not real either." Or: Steve has a crush and a nightmare in three parts, 5up is tired, the crew life is hard and Polus sucks.

the ones you love will call you back by homeward_bound (Apollo/Steve, teen rating, m/m | 1.8k words)

Summary: stevesuptic: dude, is it weird that i miss vegas DumbDog: No? I do too. stevesuptic: okay [steve misses vegas and apollo. they talk about it]

cough it out by cj__writes (Apollo/Steve, teen rating, m/m | 2k words)

Summary: Apollo thinks that Steve must be well and truly gone, at this point, because he giggles, like Apollo’s just told a particularly funny joke. He looks Apollo right in the eye and asks, “Do you trust me?” “Absolutely not.”

ivy by Secular_Czar (5up/Steve, teen rating, gen | 2.1k words)

Summary: It might be a sad day, in general, but Steve isn't about to let it get to him. His friends won't ever let him wallow either.

The Colosseum by WhenTheFogClears (general rating, gen | 2.1k words)

Summary: Five squinted, looking at the colosseum intensely. He thinks Apollo was latched onto the sphinx’s shoulder, fur matted with blood. Janet was slumped against a column, probably out, with Kimi whose bow was snapped in two, her leg twisted at an odd angle. DK was in the corner trying to cast various supporting hexes and charms with a broken arm, whilst Hafu was dragging a heavily bandaged Steve away. or 5up slaughters a cat

Oneshots :) by woofles1990 (5up/Fundy, 5up/Steve, teen rating, multi | 2.5k words, oneshot collection)

Summary: Just a bunch of MCYT/Among Us oneshots, mainly featuring 5up's crew because yes :)

the adventures of 5up and steve staying up late because they're under 30 by 5280ft (5up/Steve, teen rating, m/m | 2.5k words)

Summary: “The night is young!” Steve yells at the ceiling, throwing his hands up in the air. “Take advantage of it! Commit crimes! Fuck hoes!” Five catches his hands in the air and laughs. “You wish you had hoes.”

unreasonably in love by cj__writes (Apollo/Steve, teen rating, m/m | 2.6k words, chaptered WIP)

Summary: "It was like pieces of a puzzle, everything coming together. And now, here they are, standing in their apartment, which looks more like a hollow shell than a home, filled solely with scattered boxes and the minuscule amount of furniture that they brought with them to Vegas." Or: what happens after Apollo and Steve move in together.

cant be love by fourpebbles (Apollo/Steve, teen rating, m/m | 3.5 words, chaptered WIP)

Summary: He had chuckled to himself, he felt so stupid. Who in their fucking minds names a playlist 'sugr?', he thought, internally cringing. A story where a Steve meets an Apollo, and some things happen.

Somewhere in the darkness, us together for a while by tumtummeke (Apollo & Kimi & Steve, teen rating, gen | 3.6k words)

Summary: Apollo worries about Steve. Steve breaks his vape pen. Kimi plays power washer. Self-indulgent angst, with a generous helping of friendship and cuddles.

odyssey by 5280ft (5up/Steve, teen rating, m/m | 23k words, chaptered WIP)

Summary: "First you will come to the Sirens who enchant all who come near them. If any one unwarily draws in too close and hears the singing of the Sirens...they warble him to death with the sweetness of their song. Therefore pass these Sirens by and stop your men's ears with wax that none of them may hear." -Homer, The Odyssey

Also: SilverSprinklez10‘s yupwaves collection.

Summary: This is a Harry Potter AU based on the characters/personas of the youtubers/streamers.

FAQ:

Wait what is this: pretty straight to the point! i’ll regularly share crewfu-related fanfictions to this blog :)

How regularly is “regularly”?: great question! LOL. it depends on the flow of fanfics that get uploaded, which i do not have any control over, but i’m looking forward to do this twice a month. after all, it’s only me doing this and i often run on a tight schedule.

What’s the format like?:

[title of fic with link] by [author of the fic with link] ([main pairing(s), if there is one/multiple], [fic rating: eg, general rating], [relationship: eg, m/m] | [word count in k] ([added prompt to specify if it’s complete or not)])

Summary: [summary provided by the author. if it doesn’t have a summary, a “No summary” prompt will be put instead]

(What does WIP mean again?): Work In Progress :)

Why are you doing this?: from the beginning, my blog has hosted conversations about RPF (real people fiction) and crewfu pairings. this has evolved into people sending me updates about certain fics in the crewfu tags every now and then, but i wanna take the next step and just do these things myself. after all, i’m already lurking in the tags often to see the fics that get posted. as someone who is both a writer and a reader, i wanna appreciate fanfic writers and help out other people that want to read fanfic and consume more fandom content!

Will it be AO3 only?: well, ao3 has a very helpful tag system that makes finding fics incredibly easy, as well as allowing people with no accounts to like and comment on fics, so that’s the site i will personally look in for fanworks. but if there are any fics you’ve written or liked in any other platforms, such as wattpad, you can always contact me through my inbox (send an ask or a dm!), and i’ll make sure to include for the next fanfic spotlight :)

Does it mean you won’t reply to fic asks anymore?: yeah, i guess. since i’ll be doing the searching myself it seems counterproductive. but if i ever skip a fic or again, it’s in another platform, or you’ve posted/read the fic a while ago and you want to get more traction on it, hit me up and i’ll take it into consideration!

Will you read every single one of the fics on your list?: oh no. again, i run on a tight schedule, and also i have my own taste when it comes to fics. i won’t be reviewing fics or any of the sort, and my intention extends to simply sharing these fics to this page so people will have easier access to them :) that’s where ao3 tagging becomes SUPER useful!!!

So what’s the criteria for the way you’ll sort out the fics in your list?: word count, going from lowest to highest. in case of fics in other platforms, i guess i’ll put them at the top of the list. i’ll also be looking for fairly recent fics, so let me know if you want any old-ish fic to be included.

I see you talking mostly about 5up/Steve and Steve/Apollo. Can I still send/see other crewfu fics?: why yes absolutely! my goal is to push every fic which heavily features regular crewfu characters - 5uptic and supdog just happen to be very popular pairings. so, to give you a list: core 4 (5up, hafu, dk, steve), apollo, aipha, annie, janet, kimi, ellum, koji... you know the drill. it doesn’t have to be centered on a relationship, or about 5up in specific, etc. my only requirement is that any of the previously mentioned members are a central part of the fic or are HEAVILY featured in it (sorry, minecraft fics with 50+ tags who only mention 5up as an afterthought won’t make the cut :/).

Isn’t shipping Bad™?: well, it’s a little more nuanced than that. i will go out of my way to discourage and shame people who often violate CCs’ boundaries by acting like so and so has a crush on this person, or that this and that are Actually Into Each Other or secretly dating. any sort of tinhat bullshit is a big nono (think larries). but i run on the assumption that people who write rpf understand that what they’re doing is simply write a completely fictional story using real life personalities, and understand the boundaries necessary to do it - aka they’re not tinhats, they understand they can’t assume everything about CCs’ thoughts and personalities, they understand that what they’re writing is strictly fiction, they keep these works only in fandom circles, etc. (but again, it’s only one me doing this, so please be kind if i don’t happen to know that this person is Actually a tinhat or whatever).

show fic: NO. (seriously. i don’t feel comfortable putting my ao3 account out there. please respect my privacy on these trying times <3)

I REALLY don’t care about your rpf/fic talk: fair! i’ll be tagging every single one of these posts as “fanfic spotlight”, so just mute the tag using tumblr settings so you’ll never have to look at these! likewise, you can follow the tag if you want to keep up with it, or search it on my blog to look at the other entries you might have missed (but this is the first one! lol).

Hey, my fic is here and I don’t feel comfortable with it being shared over here: no problem! let me know as soon as you can and i’ll take it down <3

#crewfu #fanfic spotlight

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skaylanphear · 3 years

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Hi there! Do you have any advice on improving traction towards a fanwork/fic? I love writing—and it's not for notoriety by any means—but having validation and feedback also feels nice (I hope that's not conceited). What would you recommend to someone without a large audience/follower base? I do "advertise" on tumblr when my work is written/updated on AO3. How did your journey start? Thank you!

This is an interesting question and I doubt most people are going to like the answers, but here we go:

So, first and foremost, you need to be realistic about why you're creating in the first place. If you're doing work in a fandom that is older, where content has stopped coming out, or that is simply smaller, you're not going to get much engagement, period. There will, of course, be activity in these fandoms, but it will be far less and the people involved—while they may view your work—will be less likely to comment/spread it around simply because there's not much going on. So if you're creating in that sort of environment (which can be a really good environment if you're looking for something chill with no pressure), then you have to be prepared for low engagement, even if the people you do meet and who are willing to talk about your work are more regularly in your sphere. You can probably make better/closer friends in these sorts of fandoms, if you're willing to try.

But, on the other end of this, if you're coming into a huge fandom late, it's also going to be harder to wade through the massive following to get your stuff out there. For example, in both the Miraculous and Sk8 fandom, I started work pretty early on, when the shows were still gaining traction, and so my "name" as a creator gained traction parallel to that growth, as opposed to when I started writing in the Voltron fandom. With Voltron, I came in super late and so what few fics I had that did gain traction took a lot longer to get there because people already had their fav content creators in the fandom, etc. It's not impossible to get popular in this situation—far from it—but it does take longer.

You'll also benefit from having finished works early on in a fandom's lifespan, at least with writing. This is because there's less competition for views and so more people will be filtered to your work, initially. This means that you have a better chance of getting those comments and kudos. Having a finished work increases this engagement because people look for finished works before works in progress. Generally, the length of a fic doesn't matter much for popularity, so long as it's DONE. When I was writing in the ML fandom, quite a few of my earlier fics were shorter, and they compete in popularity with my longer fics, because people care more about having a finished story, not a long story. That's why when it came to Only Practice Makes Perfect in the Sk8 fandom, I worked hard to get that shit done, because it was the most popular story I had in the fandom and I decided—like an idiot—to make it a long fic. Which, yeah, means people probably love it/remember it more in the long run, but if I hadn't finished it in 2 to 3 months, I'd have lost considerable traction as far as making a name within the fandom.

This leads into one of the most important points, if not THE MOST IMPORTANT point in gaining an audience—consistency. If you do want to be a successful creator, you Have To Be Consistent. This is the most difficult hurdle for all creators, and it is oftentimes impossible to make happen. If you want to aim for professionalism, which a lot of fandom creators don't care about (which is fine), then consistency is how you get there. Nobody wants to read a fic or follow an artist who doesn't stick to creating what they start (RIP all my unfinished works and the people who left me as a result, LOL). Using my most recent works as an example, I very, very, very consistently updated Only Practice Makes Perfect multiple times a week. To the point where people got comfortable expecting it, which is the key variable here. When people become comfortable that you will regularly create content, they not only stick around, but will be more interactive with you and your work. Nobody likes the disappointment of getting involved with a work only for that work to rarely get updates. Most people don't have the attention span to care. I'll admit, if I read a fic that's not finished and the writer takes one week to update, then one week, then THREE weeks, I probably will, like, forget about it. That's just life.

The best thing you can do is schedule. And again, this is the HARDEST thing to do, because it holds the creator to a deadline. Most people who create in fandoms don't want that kind of pressure—and that's fine. I go back and forth on when I have scheduled releases and when I don't, depending on what I'm aiming to do. But if you to retain your audience, telling them that you will update a work regularly on such and such a day and such and such a time, it creates something for them to remember. If they're invested in your work, they will think, "oh, it's Friday, that means such and such is coming out with something new." But, with that in mind, you also have to commit to a schedule that people will remain invested in. Which basically means you can't put things out more than a week away from each other, unless you're really, really famous, lol. If I told people I was going to go on a two week update schedule, I would lose most of my audience. But a week is long enough for people to both still remember and anticipate. That's just how the scheduling of the world works. And if you're an artist that's working on a big project, then you have to share progress, or pieces of what you're doing on a regular basis. That's what generates "buzz" and keeps you relevant. And, yeah, that's a really hard schedule to commit to, because it's a lot of work. BUT this consistency is where you see people being successful. Popular youtubers may not have gained their popularity by being consistent, but most sure do retain it that way. And again, there are outlying exceptions, but they generally ARE exceptions.

Speaking of hard work, here's probably the second hardest thing to accomplish—you have to be prolific. Especially as a writer. You have to write A LOT if you want to gain an audience. And yeah, that means you have to work, a lot. I love my work, so I enjoy that "grind," and I also have developed a lot of strategies to work around writer's block and every other obstacle that tends to catch people up. I work in a very professional manner—I do outlines, and drafts, and plan. I do a lot of stuff that people who do this kind of thing for fun can't be bothered with (and that's fine), but that's because I find it to be what works best in creating an efficient environment. I'm also very, very NOT lazy, lol. I was raised in an environment where you have to work for everything that you want. My parents didn't buy me my first computer, or snowboard, or what have you. We were tight on money and if I wanted something, they couldn't help me—I had to get that shit on my own. And I also grew up on a farm, where hard work was a staple of how you did things. You did things the right way, even if it was the hard way. You can't cut corners and it's the same with this. If you want it, you have to actually do the work, that's it. Some people get lucky with popularity, most don't. Most famous actors didn't become well-known off their first efforts, they had to keep trying and keep working and then they have to continue to do that to stay relevant. So if that doesn't sound great to you, then you might want to not focus on your audience and just create because you enjoy it, lol. Sometimes that's what I do too, when I don't wanna deal with the pressure.

Moving on, here's another point that nobody is going to like. Simply put, you also have to be good at what you do. I think some people don't realize that I've been writing fic for over fifteen years. I currently have nearly 2 millions words worth of fics on AO3 and that doesn't include a majority of the stuff I've ever written. I practice A LOT. I write every day. And I'll tell ya, when I started out in middle school, my stuff was not good. But I worked hard, I ignored the hate, and I kept going. That is the only way you will ever get better at anything. There's no quick way to become a better writer, or artist. And a vast majority of people are only going to pay attention to your stuff if it's quality work. Getting to that point is a process, on top of then creating stuff that fits into popular molds. Not only am I good at what I do (and I don't care how arrogant that sounds—I've worked my ass off), but when it comes to fandoms, I rarely write "rare pairs" and "crack ships." Generally, if it's popular, that's where I am. That makes a big difference and I honestly don't have sympathy for people who write rare pairs and such and then complain about lack of engagement. You knew what you were getting into (it's mostly the Miraculous fandom that gave me this bitterness). If you're not writing what people WANT to read, then your audience is simply going to be smaller. And that audience doesn't owe you their attention, no matter how frustrating it is or how good your work is. I could be the best writer in the world, but if I'm writing RekixCherry fic, I have nobody to blame but myself when nobody reads it. BUT if that's your passion, and writing a certain unpopular thing makes you happy, then, again, you need to not be concerned with traction and your audience.

The last point I'll make is that it matters HOW you present yourself online. A good chunk of the well-known creators in any fandom are, simply put, older people. And those that aren't, and are able to connect with those older creators, have generally created a bubble around themselves of maturity and, like, of being nice, lol. A lot of creators are skittish these days, and if you're an asshole (anti) or fight a lot over stupid shit, you may get a bigger audience, but you will isolate yourself from other creators. And this is important because oftentimes it is your exposure to other creators that will get your work circulating. The reason I got popular in the ML fandom? I wrote a short angst fic and a really popular artist shared it/talked about it and the rest was history. But if I'd had a habit of being an asshole, probably wouldn't have happened. And, granted, I'm not saying don't voice your opinions, but if you're loud all the time, it does turn people off. Especially creators because they are oftentimes the ones being attacked. They don't want to pull more of that negative bullshit into their lives. I'll admit, when I was in the ML fandom, I was down for a fight, but then that's what people came to expect, and it probably did turn others off, and then when I didn't fight, or didn't think the way my audience thought I should, it, again, turned people off. It's really not worth it unless being that type of person IS your platform.

So, that's all the advice I can give, I suppose. And even if you do all this stuff, that still doesn't mean you're going to be popular. At the end of the day, the thing that I stick to is this—I do what I want, I love what I do, and I work hard. If I'm in a position to worry about all that other stuff, then sure, I do, but otherwise… There's no easy way to become popular and, quite frankly, it's better to just "live" working hard and being a decent person than it is to focus on all this bullshit. I've created a working environment where I function within these "points" quite naturally, so it's not something I think about (except for schedules, lol). Sometimes I get popular in fandoms, sometimes I don't. At the end of the day, it comes down to how much work you're willing to do, because you will always be giving more than you are getting back, so you have to at least enjoy what you're doing.

Seriously, just do it because you love it. And if the pressure of everything above is something you don't love (I like a good, high pressure situation, lol), then don't do it that way—it's not worth the grief.

#skaylanphear replies #anonymous

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tottymatsuno · 2 years

Text

Requests FAQ NO MINORS ALLOWED!

im sick of tumblrs text editors so im just gonna link to tiny urls.

https://abiesfir.tumblr.com/post/674702675586236416/updated-info-minors-and-blmtsuproshpper-dni

Everyone has been very polite to me, and I apologize because I'm writing this in a frazzled and agitated state so if it comes off as rude I'm sorry. I'll update with more questions as they come.

MINORS DNI

The Basics!

Who are you?/What's your age/What's your race?/How much free-time do you have?

I'm Robin, I am 26 and I am a black transmasc/genderfluid adult. I have mental illness and talk about it a lot, this blog is literally my healthy coping mechanism because I am currently unmedicated. I will not disclose anything else further on the matter. I am also physically disabled so a lot of my stories are unbeta'd bc of it.

I have a small baby and a wife so my time is very divided. I can't spend a ton of time editing and fixing things up perfectly and I don't actually have a beta editor. I do this to destress and as self care. So me enjoying the requests is important. Don't make me feel obligated to do these free requests bc I will get pressured and won't do them anymore.

Will You block me for being under 18?

YES, LEAVE, GO, DO NOT COME HERE, I DONT WANT ANY MINORS INTERACTING WITH MY POSTS! Leave!!! Don't fucking come in here!!! Don't bother, please just for the love of fucking God this is my one thing, minors and 18 year olds, GO HOME!

I HAVE WRITTEN MULTIPLE TIMES FOR MINORS TO LEAVE ME ALONE! I DONT WANT YOU HERE!

Can you do a request for X non African American culture?

No, I like to write for black american girls. Whatever I write would be culturally insensitive and would be solely based off of the stereotypes I know of. I wouldn't try to be racist or malicious, but I do this for fun and am not going to research a culture for a request. Not trying to be funny but there's also the fact that black girls are thoroughly under represented in self inserting/fics so I'm doing my part <3

You should def write your own though and link it back to me!! I would loooove to read it! I highly recommend and encourage for people to make the content they'd like to see!

What race are the Readers? Can I imagine myself or my own cultural/ethnic background?

All black! Every request, every reader, every story is written with a black woman in mind. All of them! And yeah go ahead! I try to avoid major character descriptions but yeah I don't mind! Have fun!

Why don't you write more trans fics if you're not cis and hc Totty as trans?

Hmmm, that's complicated but mostly because I struggle with gender issues involving being perceived as attractive and I deal with a lot of shame bc of it. If I'm a man and I like a woman, in my head I'm not allowed to be interested in her bc I'm not passing or presenting masculine. If she's a lesbian then I feel guilty because I'm a man. If she's bi I worry she'll think of me as a woman. Annd the same with men!

And I headcanon Todomatsu as trans and I do not want to come off as a chaser or being solely interested in him for being a woman. I wouldn't feel comfortable writing trans Totty sexually either bc I don't want to be offensive or weird. annnd I don't wanna base his trans status off of my experiences with my wife so. yea

Is this a requests blog?

No! This is a Todomatsu blog that DOES requests for fun! And not only is it a Todomatsu blog, its my self insert ship blog for Todomatsu. This is all for fun beloveds and I have the most fun making content for Totty.

Are you comfortable with like/reblog sprees?

GO AHEAD! Not gonna lie tho, it is kinda funny but does hurt my feelings when I see some of yall doing that and then not follow me...I have a couple regulars who show up everyday for like 2 weeks and then don't follow me. Follow me???

And gimme comments and laugh at my jokes and let me know I'm being funny and praise me???????? pls?

Can I DM you/Be your friend/Talk to you?

GO AHEAD!!!! I want friends!! If you wanna specific anon name you can have one, but feel free to be my friend! I'm not really anybody but that guy who doesnt stfu. i dont see myself really as a content creator or writer i literally am possessed and when I say this is mental illness baby you better believe my therapist knows all about Todomatsu and has heard half the shit I say on here.

Don't feel intimidated, I wanna be your friend more than you wanna be mine! Let's talk!

Requests!

How should we ask for requests

Preferably indicating if you want a bullet hc list, a minific (with your matsuno of choice or all brothers), your pronouns and the scenario.

If it's an art request please say so! If it's an art request from a meme link me the meme as well?

Are you still working on my request?

Unless I replied to the request itself and said no, then yeah. If I make a post referencing the request saying "I'll alter the prompt" its usually for my own comfort. But yeah, unless I answer the request without any text than yeah I'm still workin on it.

Some might take time because I have a very active life outside of this blog. My baby is high needs, I have lots of doctors appoints, I get hospitalized a lot, there's family emergencies, there's IRL obligations. I'm an adult, ik it might seem like it bc I'm glued to my phone but I have an adult's life.

It's taking a while, why is that?

Did you request a scenario with ALL six of the brothers, was it detailed, was it kinda just vague, did I make a text post saying I was working on it and it'll be a minific?

If so please know I'm working on it! Most minifics takes me a few hours to mentally map out - I'm doing SIX of them btw. Then I need to make an outline, SIX of them again. Then I need to actually write all SIX of them.

You answered my Todomatsu request right away but not my all boys request?

Because I'm a Totty blog! I don't hate the others and I love the requests I get but Todomatsu is my favorite I'm in love with him clinically and he is the current target of my diagnosed erotomania soooo I'm dropping everything to answer, draw, write, obsess and lust after him. Thank u send more requests of him specifically if u want a fast turnaround.

What makes you do a bullet list vs a mini fic?

if the request leads into a mini fic I'll do one. It's actually harder for me to think of bullet lists than mini fics so I kinda prefer mini fics.

Can request 18!matsu? Or a scenarios where the Matsunos have a SO that thinks of his brothers like their own?

No. The short of it is just NO. The long of it is: I have PTSD. My fear of interacting with children - especially little boys stems from deep seated childhood trauma. The most painful aspect of this of this trauma involves my step brother and several younger cousins. I will not further elaborate but I'm sure y'all catch my drift. Don't do it.

In my personal real life I am so terrified of men and boys younger than me that I refuse to think about men six months younger than me as attractive.

Do not ask me for anything involving the 18 vers of them that isn't strictly platonic.

And when I write I usually in some way or another imagine myself so if you want a request about the reader viewing the others as brother you must request only ONE brother and that's it. Do not ask me to write switching POVs from a reader who sees Oso-Ichi + Todo as little brothers while dating Jyushimatsu to a POV of Karamatsu being the love interest and the rest brothers.

I will shut down requests for a week if anybody asks for Todomatsu being seen as the reader's younger brother or Todomatsu under the age of 25. If it happens more than once I will no longer take requests indefinitely.

I sent a funny nonsensical joke and you didn't get it/I sent an anon and you didn't understand it?

I like things that I understand and with a context. I'm not ontop of all the latest memes and it's very hard for me to grasp when things are jokes.

What NSFW are you comfortable with?

https://tinyurl.com/whatwillyouwrite

Do you take Whump requests?

No is the short answer. No because I find the genre and fetish very uncomfortable as a disabled person. I don't like the idea of romanticizing people's suffering. I don't like the fact the genre is about kissing someone's pain better and then causing them more pain.

If someone was getting off to me crying or having a panic attack or my chest hurting or me getting taken to the ER or me fainting or me being physically dependent on them I would actually be very upset. I don't want to write about that because recovery is painful, yes but it's not a smut genre to me at least. Ik some whump isn't a fetish but it's so tied together. Anyways uh, no. Don't submit anything like that.

If you do and it slips through just know I probably didn't interpret it in the way you'd like and it'd be a serious piece and completely tonally unsexy and unfluffy. So save us both the heart ache.

#faq for my fics #goin in the pinned post soon #edited real quick

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