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deadghosy · 2 months

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How would (Separate) Hazbin hotel (Demons &Angel) react to a green thumb gardener whose elegant, classy and attractive and she went to hell by mistake but it was a happy one (She's not completely weak as she has her plant to protect her and everything)

HAZBIN HOTEL X GARDENER! READER

prompt: a common mistake made demons and angels swoon over a gardener who just wants to take care of her/his plants

cw! Sir Pentious is alive for this so he can witness your beauty in flowers💗

note! I listened to Lana Del Rey while making this lol.

HELL

You didn’t know you were supposed to be in heaven as you started your own flower shop. It was the biggest know hell flower store with actual flowers.

You were practically poison ivy, but more kind and definitely calmer. Hell, even some of your regulars call you poison ivy. Mostly because if people touch you metaphorically the wrong way, then you technically show them a harsher side of you. Literally, a plant impaled a sinner trying to rob your store.

What you didn’t except to get friends or even people interested into you as you just have a normal as shop you dreamed of before dying.

“Welcome to my flower shop, what can I help you with?” You said with a soft smile as a flower vine is watering other flowers in the background. Some imps, sinners, and hell borns go all the way to just see you and your flowers.

I can see you wearing a flower crown or just flowers in your hair. Like dead ass giving rapunzel. Possibly so, your alive flowers and vines had made that for you as you worked.

You most definitely wear those cute gardening outfits like overalls or those dresses if you prefer one of them or both.

See this is what I can imagine, I can imagine the whole damn hotel having a flower competition and you show up with a big ass plant with a neat pink bow on it 😭. You definitely had a smile as you drank tea with a secret smirk.

I can see you visiting the hotel Charlie has as she invited you to do some flower decor for a reopening of the hotel.

Imagine how pissed you were when a couple of sinners came in to make your shop look like shit. But you wasn’t gonna stand for it as you raised your hand grabbing the sinners by their necks with vines. “If you want flowers, I wouldn’t mind making you a funeral for you to have some.” You said with venom as the sinner practically shitted themselves as they were thrown out the windows of your shop.

A sinner had thrown a Molotov cocktail once in your shop all because he thought it was weird to have a “girly” flower shop in hell. As the fire spreads in your shop, you sighed having plant vines cover you in a big ball as one of the vine slither to find the culprit. After finding the culprit, you forced them to clean your shop since killing someone for such a petty crime like that in your opinion isn’t worth killing. You can always make a new shop and fix it.

Vaggie most definitely knows you as you hooked her up with flowers that Charlie might like. You told her Charlie seems like a simple girl would just like roses since they represent romance. And basically it was Vaggie and Charlie’s date night. And it was a success.

Angel dust loves how you don’t judge him for who he is by his work. But he definitely loves how you two gossip over some tea, well he drinks while you drink tea or water. You are like an older sister/brother figure to him. He loves resting in your bean bag you have in the back, he could just come in and and lay down straight.

I headcannon your whole palette to be like green, pink, yellow and white. Literally just spring ass colors to seem classy with your flower shop.

I can imagine you having the personality of applejack but more of a flower and gardening person as gardener! Reader were most definitely born in the south. Like I can imagine reader to be a mix of applejack, rarity, fluttershy but 100% of applejack’s honesty and a lot of Rarity’s elegance.

Niffty adores you! Literally she goes in your store to rant about she wants the hotel to smell fresh and ready. And you hook a sista up with how you give her scented plug in. She immediately starts worshipping you like Alastor which makes Alastor raise a brow seeing a shine of you in her room and drawings of you.

Charlie immediately loves how vaggie and angel ador you and find you as a loyal friend. She would love to have you at the hotel as a resident. She could even beg Alastor or her dad to make a flower shop for you to even stay longer by briding. She would also try to become your friend for her to succeed.

Sir Pentious went to your store to apologize again to Alastor as he felt that Alastor didn’t forgave him. He was scared you weren’t a kind “sinner” that only had a flower shop to scam people for their money. But when you spoke with kindness and care towards the snake demon. He felt calm in your presence, to the point when he got his flowers. He gave you one which made you smile at him and put it in your hair. He blushed and ran off.

The egg boiz love too appear in your store as their boss, penthouse is very nervous to talk to such an attractive person like you. You welcome the eggz to your humble store as you give them flowers to give back to the hotel staffs.

Angel and Cherri most definitely asked you to give them flowers to match their personality. You gave them both a Carnation flower which you thought was good for their personality. Or even a Lilly.

Husk kept seeing the crew leave the hotel to see them come back with flowers. He grumble confused at why they kept getting flowers. That is until he asked Charlie, and Charlie ranted about what a beauty and how kind you are. Husk raised a brow thinking you were putting up an act, so he went to see you. Let’s just say he got a rose coming back with a soft smile and a purr.

The Vee’s heard about you, Vox heard about you first and looked you up to see you are a popular florist and gardener with the power of Chlorokinesis. The power to mentally and physically control flowers. Vox smirked hearing about your 5 star rating shop. If it was that high ranked with people commenting it on yelp saying you were the best business to be at. You definitely got his attention at most.

Lucifer went to your store for some flowers to give to his daughter, and when he heard how amazing your store was. He went to se it himself. He definitely felt your pure spirit making him stumble into confusion on why you weren’t in heaven already. But he got his flowers and felt with a cup of tea you gave him. He shortly came back at the end of the day to give you his own flowers as he smiled with a snake smile and left leaving a note that says, “you’re welcome to come stay at the hotel! :)”

Alastor finally decided to meet you after hearing all the good things you did for the hotel and for the staff. He must say he was jealous how you won their hearts so damn quickly. He went to your store to see what’s all the fuss about and got hit with a lavender scent in his nose. He covered it as he wasn’t use to such sweet smell in hell as it’s filled with fire and blood. And there you were sitting there with a smile as warm plate of teas sat by you. You welcomed him as he made chat with you to find your heart pure with gold. He also left with a rose and a genuine smile.

I imagine how sweet you get your own flowers by regulars and your friends at the hotel as they love your passion about plants.

Headcannon on Gardner! Reader to be a Lana Del Rey fan as the song to match her/him is “born to die” 💗🦆

Vox was obviously the first Vee to meet you face to face as he had researched you so many times on the internet to get any scoop of you to only end up with an empty hand. So he decided to see you in person and smile with a charming one to see you greet him with a smile and show him the recommended flowers for loved one and family. He was not into the flowers as he watched the plant vines in the back work like hands. He smirks trying to use his hypnosis, but failed greatly as a flower in a vase covered his sighting of you. Thanks to your plant vines.

Velvette was the second one to come to your store as she was not impressed at how “boring and plain” it was in your shop. She was snarky about the decor and gave you tips on how to make it “pop” in here. You just smiled, and with a snap of your fingers, the decor changed to a more fashionable flower place. It made the female Vee almost drop her jaw and composure. But she can’t let some flower store shock her. So she left with one last snarky comment under her breath.

Valentino definitely came in last to see what was up with your whole popularity of your “business” of flowers as he was so busy working his porn industry. So when he walked in yo see you reaching for some flower seeds to get for a customer. He grabbed your waist, wanting to seem flirty only for it to backfire as a vine punches him away from you. You already knew who this bastard was, and you weren’t gonna let him get you like how he got angel. So during his entire visit at your shop, you made it a living hell. Literally.

I can see the Vee’s coming back every weekday to try and get you to be their little flower pet, but you ain’t buying it. 😘

You most definitely have a vine hammock in the corner of your store as you just sit there and nap during your breaks.

Imagine how cool and sweet you are to the imp and hell born children that come to visit your store for father day and mother day. Hell, even valentines days

I can headcannon that gardener! Reader has once in their hell life down there had to drag out a rude Karen ass bitch by their hair. You fuck with their plants, you fuck with them.

Imagine how chill you are just sipping tea as your plants and vines attack some dude trying to steal your sunflower seeds. Yeah, no one gets out without being traumatized by plants 😍

You came into the hotel once and immediately got love bombed by everyone. But not in a manipulate way, they just appreciate how amazing you are to people even the staff at most. They go as far to throw you a “welcoming” party 💗

Lucifer had most definitely sent ducks with mini flower crowns and a Gardner duck to you as he finds you very elegant and beautiful in your own way. He even accidentally tries to court you with his wings when he leans against at the front desk of your store staring into your eyes.

HEAVEN

Adam had eventually was sent to take you back into heaven as sera realized her mistake. You willingly went with Adam who smirked at your sweet smile and took you up by your hand. Like, let’s say whatever happened in the hell section didn’t happen as you just had a bad time in hell itself.

St. Peter immediately greets you, making feel welcome to your new home. He even baked you cookies with a smiley face. He tries to make chit chat with you when he isn’t on duty getting people into the gates. He literally visits your workplace in the flower store you own, bringing cookies, making sure you are okay. Hell-, I meannn heaven gods..he must be a househusband cause GYATT DAMN this man is making sure you are well and healthy in heaven’s care. 💗💗

Sera most definitely have showed you around heaven with a please smile to see a Gardner. You would’ve been great for the Garden of Eden, is what she says in her head as you smile at the trees and potted plants around. You even showed the seraphim your powers, and she must say that she was pleased and made you a gardener around heaven and even your own garden shop and house.

Emily most definitely tries to go visit you everyday to try and find flowers that match you so you can be surprise when she buys you flowers herself. You and Emily definitely have a sibling relationship at most because of how she looks up to you in a gardening way as she also wants to impress you by making her own garden and green house. She also makes sure you take breaks as she wants to help with the customers as you take a break in the back. Your friendship with her is so wholesome and lovely.

Adam likes how classy you are, you don’t even cuss him out when you are angry at him. You just put your hand in his face and walk away. Sassy, but classy enough to not curse someone the fuck out. Yeah sure that might’ve turned him on a bit at how hot and “bitchy” that was of you. Cause no one has ever rejected the “Dickmaster”. So it was his duty to make you his friend…sorta😨. But it’s all fun and games at how you guys are like frenemies at most since Adam actually can’t stand you, but still flirts at how attractive and kind you are. Hell even strong minded.

The angels absolutely love coming in your store! They find every single plant and flower you made incredible. You practically almost run out of business when it’s Valentine’s Day, Mother’s Day, and Father’s Day. But you can’t complain when they leave so much heaven bucks for you to get more plant seeds and such. The angels also love how pure of gold your heart is as you even give some off free for the heaven borns and winners.

Big headcannon on how your Gardner outfit in heaven, the palette is a soft green and pink pastel. But Adam and Sera had thought about you wearing a gold, white, and blue type of Gardner outfit. They want you to stay pure and mighty.

OOOH IMAGINE HAVING CUTE ASS WHITE GLOVES 😭😭 LIKE THEY HAVE THOSE STITCHED IN GOLD THREADS AND LIKE THEY ARE SO CUTE AND COMFY INSIDEEE💗💗

Since i headcannon that Gardner! Reader to be a damn Lana Del Rey fan, their song that matches them in heaven is “young and beautiful.” As you are young and beautiful and mostly, you’re in heaven.

Literally imagine Adam just shows up to just degrade you, but it doesn’t work as you just sit there reading your daily newspaper or on your phone to just see plant and gardening instagram from earth and heaven. Adam pouts or even scoffs before taking your phone and acting like a fussy cat wanting attention.

You really don’t give a fuck about Adam but he definitely gives a fuck about you.

The angels sometimes ships you with Adam, but they also ship you with st.peter at how he is basically the house husband and you are the girl boss who works their ass off😭

Lute and Adam are definitely the type to be those teens who visit their local market..dead ass when they are free they just come to your store and just start “window shopping”…but really they just either want to mess with you or actually know about your day.

I can see you literally just chilling, and Adam busts open the store door that has that jingle bell on it so harsh and all he says is. “Wassup bitch!” With his usual grin and a soda cup as you just groan annoyed.

St.peter literally tried to work beside you ok his days off to just see how “calming” your job is. Until rush hour comes😭 that’s when hell itself unleashes with people wanting to grab any scented flower candles and flowers for theirselves. Have mercy on Peter’s soul that he doesn’t get grabbed and clawed all because he said that the last product was in the back. 😭😭

Imagine how cute your damn angel wings must be. Cause I imagine them to be some god damn fairy wings to match a beautiful aesthetic with your flower and gardening store.

I headcannon you actually had thrown Adam like how vaggie thrown the staff like in the episode of “scramble eggs.”

lol I can see you just slapping Adam with your plant vine because of one misogynist joke he made. He had the most whip lashed mark on his face. He stopped making those fücking jokes like that as he just flinches as a vine comes near him. “WALK HIM LIKE A DOGGG!!” 😘😍

Sera loves gaining flowers from you as the angelic guards bring them in as she is doing her work.

Emily also feels the same way as she smiles and makes the guard send you flowers as well for a thank you. 💗🥺 please give this sweet baby a note back saying you appreciate her damn note so much..

Imagine having a whole tea and cookie station by your front desk where people pay. Like they get a nice drink and a snack in case they were hungry and thirsty from their trip to here. 😘☀️ you care about your customers and regulars deeply.

St. Peter had one time mistook the glass doors to be opened and fell back so dramatically onto his ass, he might as well confirm himself as dead 💀

Emily most definitely actually tried to grow a plant or flower to show you how much she learnt from you, only for the damn thing to fail. She wanted to cry and shrivel up in disappointment, but you taught her and help fixed her mistake on what she did at most.

Lute most definitely acts better without Adam, of course she could act better with Adam. It’s just that Adam is her home dog, and she is Adam’s homegirl. So of course they are besties. So with Adam not interfering with you and lute talking one on one for the first time. You two get quite long to the point she grabs your hands and smile. Leaving with a flower you gave her.

Your plants just causally changing into the liked flower of the customer or regular due to your plant magic on sensing what flowers they like supposedly💗

Headcannon on how short you are. Literally you are shorter than lute to Adam and Emily. It’s really funny but to you, it’s annoying asf since Adam picks you up like a stray cat found at the front porch ready to be taken in.

Emily and sera would have tea time with you definitely. Or coffee if they prefer. You don’t gossip of course but just lift each other up and talk about hanging out later in the days or weeks later. Heck even the day later maybe if Emily is very eager.

Lute most definitely had thrown flowers in your face as she isn’t use to showing affection towards a person she actually admires. Yeah she admires Adam, as a boss and best friend. But there is something about you that makes her stumble on her words.

You had to actually stay home once, forced by sera who got told by Adam you were overworking yourself. Adam and sera hated it as sera showed go to your job looking serious. Forcing you to stay in bed until you had a good sleep for the week.

Imagine just gardener! Reader literally accidentally making Adam spit out a four leaf clover as they were saying a spell in Latin to have four leaf clovers for St. Patrick’s day.

I headcannon Adam sometimes tries to court you with his wings, and you are confused as hell as you aren’t use to being courted by some fucking feathers.

I can see you having a potted plant pet beside you. It was practically a sapling as it smiled with heaven magic and told positive affirmations to waking customers. It’s so fuckin adorable

I imagine you just sleeping as your overworked at your store and Adam comes in pissed off you didn’t come home. So he literally picks you up over his shoulder and walks Home. He has the damn key to your house but he decides to just go to his house and lay you on his bed as he sleeps on the couch grumbling.

St.Peter, after that little incident with him walking into a glass door. This mofo literally puts his hands out towards any glass door 😭 like a little kid being traumatized after a glass maze. It’s so funny but so sad.

A young heaven born had brought you back a freaking flower crown in your most favorite flowers and you were so amazed. You gave the small little angel a flower crown of their own.

The visits are always welcomed to your store as Adam brings you his own set of flowers to try to impress you. 💗 you snickered seeing the note that says, “i hope you like it..bitch. *middle finger drawing* I heard this plant was your favorite.” Sweet, but sour ass motherfuker. 😭😭

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junipers-archive · 1 year

Text

Music Moods

Word Count: 604

Includes: FLUFF, Spencer explaining how he can tell readers mood off what music she's listening to (Prompt from this challenge from @imagining-in-the-margins)

You were on the jet with the rest of the team, reading one of the many novels you packed in your go-bag while listening to the Smiths with your headphones.

Or at least thats what they saw, what you were actually contemplating was giving up on your book and staring out the window for the rest of the flight. Usually you'd use Spencer as your personal pillow but he looked busy so you tried your best not to interrupt him.

In fact, you dutifully turned your head towards him, just to enjoy how he talked, which was always using hand gestures.

He however was talking about you, though you'd never be the wiser with your music blasting so loud everyone could hear it slightly.

It wasn't anything bad of course he was only discussing what he found helped to determine your moods.

It had been Derek that asked initially, "Spence why aren't you sitting with Y/n? Trouble in paradise?"

To which spencer responded, "Actually, I find that by paying attention to what artist y/n listens to I can easily determine in what radius to her she'd like me."

"That can't be real." Emily was suspicious.

Rossi however...was familiar with how relationships went about.

"I believe it may have been...my first wife, she had this thing about how she wore here hair, up meant she was going to be more extroverted and down meant not to talk to her too much...or was it the other way around?"

"Gee I wonder what went wrong there." Derek grinned,

You tried your best to follow who was talking, but it was all reading lips and you were too lazy to reach your phone across the table to pause your music.

Spencer continued to explain and your gaze landed on him, "No, he's right, whether or not we realize it, many of us do things out habit, its our subconcious essentially communicating with the rest of the world, for instance, Y/n will listen to more 80's groups or artists like The Smiths, David Bowie and Queen when she's feeling more introverted and independent. As when we go out together she's more likely to put on more recent artists like Lana Del Rey and Lizzo because she's feeling extroverted."

Even Hotch was invested now, "But how do you know she just doesn't want to hear a specific song, written by one or the other?"

"Well I also like to take into account the beat and message of the songs, one of her favorite songs is 'Losing My Religion' by R.E.M and though the group was founded in the late 80's this specific song is more up-beat and has, like most 80's songs more of an 'all or nothing' message."

JJ spoke up now, "But what if its her favorite song? I mean like you said it is, so how do you know she doesn't just want to hear it, bad or good mood?"

Your eyes followed back to him as He smiled at the challenge, "People will gravitate more to songs that express their emotions, and often will shy away from playing a favorite of theirs as to not ruin the euphoric feeling they get when hearing the song with that of a gloomy memory."

The last question you did hear though, as you finally paused your music and could hear Emily try one last time, raising an eyebrow at what you could only assume was Spencer's consistent rants.

"And when you can't hear her music, how do you determine her mood?"

He looked to you then, catching your gaze and wiggling his fingers like a magician.

"Boyfriend instincts."

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sadderdaazee · 1 month

Text

“Daddy’s Best Friend”

♡︎> toji fushiguro (listen to florida kilos by lana del rey or the playlist linked) <♡︎

it felt odd. a little exciting. a little impish. with teetering silence brimming in your throat, your eyes drool against him.

on a sad, sad, fortunate evening, when your father was out on an unplanned business meeting to algeria, his best-friend of two years finds you alone in the house.

he had plans with your father, to play shoji with him and sip on some extra expensive wine, but fate has different plans for him.

and while you see the man standing by your doorway, a little arch pulling his right brow up, you're composed.

so, so composed.

that's what you tell yourself when you invite him inside the house.

and oh, he knows. he definitely knows. if he didn't, why would he walk in anyway?

"sir," so you say, voice low in a purr. its so low, so graveling, so seductive.

because in the twenty-two years of your life, you've never wanted a man to fuck you as bad as when you met toji.

it was a beautiful nocturne, moon's eloquent rays peeking by the expensive restaurant's window. a family dinner. and it was also your twentieth birthday, with your daddy's rich shenanigans to spoil you perfectly, he hosted a family dinner. a family dinner where your father also introduced his new friend, which so happened to be toji. when his eyes met yours, you knew this toji would be the death of your sanity.

now, your distance with your daddy's best friend is close. almost unfamiliarly close. a kind of close where you can smell his cologne but not enough to feel his searing skin.

then he sits by the sofa, and you sit right next to him. so close, your bare thighs touch his own.

"tryna seduce me, l/n?" he replies, voice as sultry as yours.

this isn't unfamiliar to him. he's grown. known. he can read people. women. their intentions. and he can clearly read yours. well, he has been reading yours since he first met you.

his elbows are by his knees in a confident way, fingers entwined among each other.

he doesn't know why he stays, what he waits for. but he stays. his chin is by his shoulder and his eyes are on you.

"brilliant job trying to guess, mr. toji. but you're wrong." you sip into his eyes.

his eyebrows raise, an almost cocky curve tugging by his smirk. you lean a little till your hands find his shoulder.

"i can read your eyes, l/n. read that look. i'm older, less naïve." he says, eyes running through yours to your lips.

"what look, sir?"

"really, sweetheart?" a smirk again. "you wanna play it this way, hmm?"

"think you know that well, sir." your eyes linger by his lips, a coquettish drag of desire falling against them.

he sighs.

"your father is my friend," agitation drapes his voice when he feels your breath pool on his lips.

"such a saint." your eyes meet his in a sarcastic manner, and for a moment, he's holding back. hating himself for even getting in this situation.

but he's not a man of morals, and definitely not someone who lets opportunities burn.

"fuck," he whimpers. "c'mere," so his lips are on yours. the crave for his hands and the ache of him finally slowly burning, his spark embedding with your inflammable desire.

his lips love to kiss your neck, and his hands find your body like a lost lamb. they trace. draw. paint. an eager hold of his searing palms under your loose shirt, as he's pulling it up.

you're wearing nothing underneath. and he's shocked. toji never knew he was friends with the father of a slut.

his fingers pinch your nipples, palms grope your tits. his lips write their soliloquies against yours, much more desperate than yours.

"what've you done t'me," his lips find your neck again, and he pulls your shirt up till your collar. his kisses drip between your tits, over the supple flesh of them and finally against the perky nubs. he sucks with fervor, eyes drawn lazy with lust as they waltz by your face. you're laying on your back on the sofa, his knee between your legs and other on the ground. "so fucking beautiful."

"not worried about d-mmh-dad anymore, hmm?" you coo mockingly as his lips trail down and lower.

"what can i do when y'such a dirty little whore, hmm?" he says, head trailed between your thighs.

his scorching breath loiters by your groin, a shiver sprinting across your bones and settling somewhere in your core.

"gonna take this off," he's breathless as his fingers hook and slide off your panties, your fingers desperately lacing among his strands of hair. you softly mutter a moan in response, an ethereal gesture dripping like honey through his ears. and toji never knew someone's voice could unravel such thoughts in him. he wants to devour you and make you sing his favorite chorus of moans.

his lips softly kiss your inner thigh, palms groping the supple flesh of your outer thigh as you let out a breath of desperation.

for once, he just stares at your pussy, like a man thanking the heavens above.

then his lips are slowly finding their way by your lower lips. he softly kisses your slit without hesitation and you swear all the breath among your lungs had vanished when he did.

his kisses are gentle, soft, dripping like honey against your slit as he furtively looks up.

"fuck, toji," you caress his hair between your fingers as he slowly kisses his way up your pussy.

the kiss he plants by your clit is a little harder than the rest, and he smirks. smirks when he feels how sensitive you are as your thighs involuntarily close around his head.

"keep your legs open for me," he breathes, spreading apart your legs. "good, y'doing so good for me." his voice is a purr as his thumb meets your slick slit, spreading it out to gain more access to you. he kisses again, a little harsher than before than has you breathing heavily.

he's waited wayyy to damn long to have this.

he pushes his tongue out, not being able to resist the urge to feel and taste you on his tongue any longer. and if he had been addicted to something before, it'd be nothing compared to the taste of you. he's addicted.

your arousal slips on his tongue, and he has to lick again. and again. and again, till he's pushing his tongue inside your pussy while you're gripping on his hair and messing all over his face. your back is slightly arching, trembling when his lips wrap around your clit.

"that's it toji," you pull on his hair and for a moment, his eyes close, relishing within your taste. "fuuck..."

but he's more of a grunter. grunting into your pussy and moaning like that's the most delicious thing he's ever tasted.

he's silent, tongue speaking the loudest words of pleasure at your cunt, lips hard sucking at your clit. his fingers find their way, from drooling by your thighs from keeping your legs spread to falling by your slit.

he loves it. your moans. your taste. and fuck, he wishes he'd fucked you the day he met you because shit. he's fucked by your taste.

your honey leaks by his lips and he has to pull back for a breath, finger still massaging your folds up and down.

"fuckin' filthy," he licks his lips and drinks you all. his fingers move and slither into your pussy with ease. it has you gasping. trembling for air because although you've fingered yourself on many instances before, the stretch of his big fingers were just something different. "n' tight. startin' to think you're not as much of a whore as i thought."

"why, don't you like running your mouth a whole lot," you sneer through your fluster. your eyes meet his and he chuckles, taking his finger out of your cunt.

the ache of his touch rattles among your hips as you find a small whine falling by your lips. before you get to whine and mourn the lost feeling, his hand meets your pussy in a spank.

"oh my— shit," you moan, and find that his he had added two more fingers into your vagina. he's fingering you with three of his fingers ruthlessly, lips wrapped tight around your clit and tongue relentlessly flicking it. you're a mess, but he likes it messy.

he likes you messy.

he curls his fingers upwards as the tip of them meets your sweet spot.

and oh, how he's proved how much he loves to run his mouth on you.

you're closing to your climax, fingers threaded into his melting strands of hair that feel like silk under your touch. and he keeps ravaging like a man starved, the greed for you finally relenting when you chant his name and feel his fingers go in and out at a pace.

"cum for me, let me taste you." he must've said but you're melting like a wax with no coherence, deaf to your surroundings as your orgasm approaches. and it approaches intensely. his fingers don't stop their motion, fingering you faster as you finally reach the point.

you moan when you orgasm, and you feel it so, so deeply within your bones and nerves. with your heart erratically thundering beneath your ribs and your ears ringing, you still feel his touch even when he's kissing your lips through your ecstasy.

"there, there," he kisses you more and then goes down on you again. not to ravage but to drink everything you've elicited from your pussy. "you're doing so good for me sweetheart." he licks everything up as every swipe of his tongue gathers your sensitivity.

his words soothe you through your orgasm as your breaths fall heavy.

"fuck," and when you're finally back to reality, you sit up. "never knew you would've been so good at this..."

your gaze drags from his chuckle to his crotch, his hard erection threatening to poke through the fabric of his clothes. so you fall to your knees, your shirt falling and covering your body.

but that's not what he wants.

"no, sugar. think that's enough for today." his finger meets your chin, making you look up at him from between his legs. and your eyes, fuck, they're the most beautiful ocean of flaming fire he's ever decided to burn himself upon. and he was hard. so achingly hard that he has to question if he's ever been this aroused before.

"but i haven't even—"

"no, you listen to me." anew sort of agitation drapes his voice. a kind you know that he's aching to not hold back. "we can't continue this. your da—"

"please," your desperate words twist something within his gut, and fuuck his cock. it aches to be touched. touched by you. his carnal gaze drinks upon your sultry words melting into the way you seem so vulnerable to him.

he looks down, and your pleading features wrecks his conscience. shatters till the shards are seeping and slicing into his skin. because suddenly, he's pulling you so harshly against his lips, hands sliding beneath your ribs and circling around your limbs.

your eyes widen, and in a whim, you're kissing him back, hands on either sides of his thighs.

you kiss deeply. so deeply, you think your lips might swell.

and toji has never been so lost in a kiss before as he is now. with such passion, he has to question his own sanity.

his fervor entwines with your own in soliloquies. he loves it. you love it.

your hands are trembling by his jaw and neck, carving your desires by his lips. you can almost taste yourself on his lips.

"why can't you understand," he says among breathless kisses, "i will ruin you. this will ruin us.

"ruin me then," your replies steep under the cries of pleas. you want this. and you want this so badly, "ruin us, toji."

he pulls you up from your knees till you're sitting on his lap, kissing intensely.

"god... y/n," he breathes in a swoon of agitation, trailing his kisses to your jaw as you arch in his warm hold. "you're making this so hard for me."

"once," your pleas, your eyes, the look on your face — he just can't fucking resist it. resist the way you're furtively grinding your bare pussy on his clothed cock with that gaze, with that desperation. "please."

and if you knew how his own desperation pars your own, you'd be surprised.

you're intoxicating. and he's a drunkard.

so he says fuck it to his conscience.

his grip on the curve of your waist grows taut, a small stifled moan leaving your lips as you continue to grind on him.

after all, he too is a man who sins.

he kisses the side of your neck in a manner of subtle affection and in a swift motion, he takes off your top, kisses between your breasts with such fervent breaths, you're sure that's gonna leave a bruise.

he pulls away for a second, panting against your lips as he tilts his face, eyes desperately drooling against your lips, "speak of this to anyone and i'll—"

"i won't." you say as if swearing upon your life. he chuckles, falling into your chest again. his eyes are sultry, half lidded as if so drunk.

he licks, sucks your breasts with greedy licks and kisses them more. your hands are falling to his belt, and he moans softly, voice rumbling beneath your bones and heart.

his head falls by your shoulder, eyes meeting where your hands unbuckle his belt.

"you seem so inexperienced," he chuckles, kissing your shoulder to whisper within your ear, "sure you can handle me?"

you fluster upon his words, taking in a breath to flush it out. "wanna help me find out." a smirk kisses your expression, and he loves it.

by now, you can feel his cock. its rigid. warm. heavy. your touch against his length sears his skin, and he lets out an agitated impatient gasp.

and you're surprised.

it falls by your stomach, and your pussy clenches.

his touch is sultry, even when he's slowly lifting you by your hips, eyes on yours with such intensity, you almost float by his gaze.

"take it," he breathes, and you nod. he rubs his tip over your lower lips, back and forth till he's generously sinking into your pussy inch by inch.

the stretch just by his tip is delicious, albeit painful. and he knows it would be painful, so despite his licentious urges, he lets you take him in slowly.

by when you're fully sheathed atop his cock and he's bottomed out fully into your tight, tight walls, you're breathing in unison, bodies almost one together. toji's eyes meet yours again.

something's so oddly sensual about you, that he can't help but fall into your ludicrous antics. something so dreamy about you, he just can't help but moan into your feeling.

"y'so fucking tight," his head falls back on the headrest of the sofa, eyes closed as his hands grip your hips.

"you're too fucking huge," you grunt in both pleasure and pain, trying to move against his cock, but his grip on your hips cease your movements.

"stay like this for a moment, please." he's whimpering.

you flinch, and so does your pussy. so deliciously that toji has to take a moment to catch his breath .

then he's lifting you up by your hips, and harshly slamming you onto his cock. it hurts so good that you almost urge to cum against him then and there itself.

"s'tight but still swallowing my cock," he grunts as you fall into a fit of moans. "aren't you a pretty girl."

and before you know it, he's laying you on your back, placing one leg over his shoulder, pushing and pulling out of your pussy. so harshly, it tickles your lower abdomen.

"fuuck baby," he moans, "takin' me so, so well. my cock's fucking stretching you out but you're just takin' it."

"yes, fuck, fuck, yes right there-" you gasp, feeling his tip graze a certain spot that has a vaguely familiar sensation stirring into your abdomen.

"makin' me feel sooo good," he moans, his hands falling by your face and tucking the wayward strands of your hair behind your ear, taking your chin between his fingers, "look at me, fuck, look at me, pretty."

"yes, fuuck, i'm so fucking close toji, fuck, fuck," his pace is animalistic as he goes raw on you, thrusting so deeply that his tip kisses your cervix.

“fuck baby, gonna cum. gonna pump you full." but before he can even say another word, you clench around him so impossibly, it's almost hard for him to thrust deeper.

you hit your orgasm as you pull him in and kiss his neck to soothe the flinches and stutters coming with the orgasm, the electricity running across your spine and rattling every bone within your body.

his arms circle around your waist as he groans, finally letting himself go. his cock stutters and swells into your walls, till he's filling your pussy with his cum. his thumb slowly strokes your cheek, slowing his pace as he groans and lets him fall through his own high.

then he pulls out, watching his tip pop out of your puffy slit. his cum trickles out of your pussy, dripping on the sofa as you sigh, settling within the breaths among your ribs.

"y/n? are you home, honey?" fuck. your dad.

471 notes · View notes

444rockstargf · 25 days

Text

"heard that you like the bad girls." | spencer reid

video games. - lana del rey

⊹₊⋆ synopsis: when the black cat meets the golden retriever.

fill out the taglist form!

female!reader x spencer

word count: 1.2k

contents: opposites attract, spencer being a sweetheart, fluff, not proofread

it had to have been a cruel joke played by the universe when you and spencer were assigned to work on a job together.

your interactions with him had never gone past glancing at him as he passed by or blankly nodding at the factoids he spat at 100 words per minute. he was a self-proclaimed genius, equipped with intelligence that many could only aspire to obtain. so it didn’t make sense to you why it was always as if his IQ got slashed in half whenever he spoke to you.

spencer was a sophisticated individual, particular about everything from the way he carried himself to how each chestnut-brown strand of his hair was laid. while you were the polar opposite. you went with the wind, going wherever the night took you. your attire consisted of dark colours and you put minimal effort into making yourself look professional, though you suppressed your style just a little to help it meet the nonexistent workplace requirements. even with your lack of interactions, spencer could tell you had a bold personality. and he longs to search and explore every part of it.

the first step he took in getting to know you was offering to give you a ride to work. as usual, you were running late. he’d said that he’d be at your place by 7:30 and you watched the long arm of the clock tick to 7:29. you slipped on your dark brown sweater, letting it rest on top of your pleated black skirt. you hastily put on your dark tights, finishing off the look with your black doc martens. you looked at yourself in the mirror, making sure you didn’t look as crazy as you felt you were going.

as the clock hit 7:30 the doorbell chimed, perfectly on cue. you quickly grabbed your bag, dashing down the stairs until you reached the front door, seeing spencer through the lens of the peephole. you let out a soft breath, taking in the 6 feet of elegance that awaited you on the other side of the door. the bright morning sub made his hair appear to be made of one million pure gold threads, his eyes turning into soft pools of honey.

with a deep breath, you opened the door, greeting him with a warm smile. he met your eyes with warm eyes and the softest smile you’d ever seen. he stared at you, not saying anything for a good moment until you cleared your throat to catch his attention. he ran a hand through his hair, blinking himself out of his smitten daze.

he couldn’t get over how much he wanted to know about you. you were attractive in a frustratingly effortless way, like you just so happened to roll out of bed looking like a goddess. he had gotten lost in your gaze again, finally coming to his senses after another long minute. “g-good morning.” you laughed softly as he stammered. “morning, doc.” you teased, never having bothered using such formalities before.

he went to extend a hand toward you before thinking that he was moving too fast. “shall we? my car’s in your driveway.” you nodded, walking out the door and shutting it behind you, making sure to lock it as you and he strolled over to his car. he opened the door for you and you hopped in, slightly flattered by his chivalrous gesture. he got into the driver’s seat next to you, stealing a quick glance in your direction as you buckled up his seat belt. he’d never been able to take his eyes off of you, but the feeling got even more intense when you were this close, your scent filling his nostrils. he started up the car, pulling out of your driveway.

you yawned, rubbing your eyes as he began to drive down your street. he raised an eyebrow. “tired?” you nodded. he began to speak again, his eyes lighting up in the way that they usually did whenever he went off on irrelevant tangents. “for optimum health and function, the average adult requires around 7-9 hours of sleep to function properly during the day. but studies show that 60% of women fall short of that goal.”

you laughed a little, amazed by how quickly he could pull the facts out of his head. he pulled out of your street, driving in the opposite direction of the workplace. “how about we head down to that coffee place across from your house? i saw it when i was coming earlier.” and he absorbed knowledge like a sponge. you smiled. “yeah, that’d be great. thank you, spencer.”

you could’ve sworn you heard him squeal when you called him by his name. you pulled out your mirror, fixing up your hair as he pulled into the parking lot. “i’ll be back in a minute, okay?” he walked into the cafe before you could respond. and he hadn’t even taken your order. you were willing to bet a large sum of money that he’d draw an assumption on how you liked your coffee. you took it black, no cream and no sugar. but no guy had ever guessed that right.

you flipped through the radio channels, searching for something good to play. you assumed that you’d be waiting for him for a while. but he walked out of the shop before you could even settle on something to play. he hopped back into the car, holding two large coffees in his hand. your eyes were wide. “that was quick.” he nodded. “i ordered ahead of time. i had a feeling you wouldn’t be used to heading to work this early.”

you rolled your eyes, accepting the cup he held out to you with a smile on your face. you took a slow sip of the drink, eyes growing with surprise as you tasted the familiar, bitter mixture. he was watching you with a stupid little grin on his face. “no cream and no sugar, right?” your eyebrows inched up on your forehead. “how’d you know that?” he shrugged, putting the keys back into the ignition. “i see you everyday. it’d be a shame if i didn’t know how you took your coffee.”

you felt a sizzling sensation spreading in your cheeks. you turned away slightly, watching the atmosphere change as he drove away. the car fell silent, something you’d never expect from spencer. then he opened his mouth to speak again. “h-hey, i’ve been meaning to ask you something…” you tilted your head to the side, curious at what he had to say. he took a deep breath, trying not to sound as awkward as he knew he was. “all this work stuff is pretty hectic, like all the time. but you seem… i-i dunno. you always listen to what i have to say and never act like i bore you. s-so… i was wondering if you’d like to try out that new restaurant that opened after work…?”

he regretted asking as soon as the word came out, but you were grinning from ear to ear as you heard him speak like a normal, nervous guy instead of the genius he was. “you asking me out on a date, spencer?” he swallowed hard, quickly looking over at you. “i guess you could put it that way…” you stayed quiet, watching as he squirmed in his seat. you found that you liked getting him all riled up. you lifted up in your seat a little and pecked him on the cheek, his face immediately flushing with crimson. “pick me up at 7:30. don’t be late.”

you and him both laughed at the irony of that statement.

author's note: i need to rewatch criminal minds. i've completely forgotten everything about it

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missukiyo · 1 month

Text

NOT WITH(OUT) ME

— ex bf! suguru geto x reader

·.⌇ 𝐒𝐘𝐍𝐎𝐏𝐒𝐈𝐒. four months into your breakup, running into your ex with his new special someone forces you to confront lingering feelings that you thought you had buried.

tags: angst, hurt no comfort, no curse au, pining, jealousy, hinted insecurities, lmk if i’ve missed any!

word count: 1.7k

a/n: instead of studying for my upcoming uni tests, this is what i do instead… procrastination who?

Four months.

It had been four months.

Four months since you and Suguru had called it quits. Four months since he had gently explained that he no longer felt the same way. Four months since he admitted that he needed space and time to focus on himself.

The breakup had been amicable, with both of you realizing that your paths were no longer aligned.

Suguru had been kind and understanding, expressing his gratitude for the time you had spent together. It was a bittersweet moment, but you had accepted it and moved on.

Or so you thought.

As you walked through the bustling markets of Shibuya, you caught a glimpse of Suguru out of the corner of your eye.

He was with a girl, her laughter filling the air as she leaned into his side.

The girl talking to Suguru was the epitome of beauty, the kind that belonged on the glossy pages of Vogue. Her pixie-cut brown hair framed her sharp features perfectly, accentuating her high cheekbones and the soft curve of her jawline. Her hazel eyes resembled pools of liquid honey, illuminating in the sunlight.

Your heart clenched at the sight, a pang of jealousy twisting in your stomach. How could he already be with someone new? It hadn't even been that long since you had broken up.

Suguru looked up, his eyes widening in surprise when he finally noticed you standing only a few meters away from them. "Hey, how have you been?" His tone was somewhat warm, genuine even. For a mere second, it was as if no time had passed between you, as if everything was still the same.

You forced a smile, trying to mask the hurt that was bubbling beneath the surface. "I've been good," you replied, your voice steady despite the storm raging inside you. "Who's that?" you gestured to the girl beside him, trying to keep your tone casual.

Suguru glanced at the girl, a smile quirking at the corner of his lips. "This is Rei. Y/N, meet Rei. Rei, meet Y/N," he introduced her, his eyes filled with warmth. "She's a friend from work."

You felt a surge of relief at his words. Rei was just a friend, nothing more. Maybe there was still a chance for you and Suguru to mend things, to find your way back to each other.

As you tried to compose yourself, Rei spoke up, her voice pleasant. “It’s really nice to meet you!”

You managed a tight smile, trying to calm yourself down. “Likewise,” you replied, your voice barely a whisper.

She’s just a friend. She’s just a friend. She’s just a friend.

Yet despite his somewhat reassuring words, you couldn't shake the feeling that there was more between them. The warmth in his eyes, the gentle smile playing on his lips, the way his gaze lingered just a moment too long... It all mirrored the way he used to look at you.

Despite his words, his actions spoke volumes. The way he leaned in slightly closer to Rei, the way his hand brushed against hers as they talked, it was all too familiar. The way he used to look at you like that, almost as if you were the only person in the world, like nothing else mattered but the two of you.

But as you studied the way Suguru and Rei interacted, the easy camaraderie between them, you couldn't shake the feeling that they were more than just friends.

Rei grabbed Suguru's arm excitedly, pointing to a trendy boutique. "Sugu, pleaseee, can you buy me that cute jacket? I promise I'll wear it all the time," she pleaded, giving him her best puppy-dog eyes.

“Don’t you already have enough of those?” He asked, raising an eyebrow playfully.

Rei groaned as she held onto his arm even tighter. “C’mon Sugu, please? F’me? It’s called retail therapy for a reason.”

Suguru chuckled, shaking his head with a smirk. "But Rei, I'm already taking you to my favorite cafe later. Isn't that enough of a treat for you?" he teased, his eyes twinkling with amusement.

“Favourite cafe, hm? Must mean I’m quite special, eh?”

Rei and Suguru seemed to have an easy rapport, their banter flowing effortlessly. It was clear that they had a connection, one that went beyond mere friendship. The realisation made your heart ache even more.

You raised an eyebrow at Rei's response, a hint of curiosity in your voice. "Oh, which cafe are you talking about?" you asked, trying to keep your tone casual despite the pang of nostalgia that tugged at your heart.

Rei beamed at you, excitement lighting up her eyes. "Some place called Café Miyama. I’ve never been there but Sugu claims it's his favorite spot in the whole city," she replied, her voice filled with enthusiasm.

Your heart sank as soon as the words ‘Café Miyama’ escaped her lips. It was the same cafe, the exact same cafe that Suguru used to take you to all the time when you were still together.

You felt a lump form in your throat as memories flooded your mind. The cozy corner booth where you would spend hours talking and laughing. The smell of freshly brewed coffee that permeated the air. The way Suguru would look at you with so much love and adoration in his eyes.

But you kept your thoughts to yourself, choosing not to mention the significance of the cafe to Suguru and Rei. Instead, you simply nodded, feigning nonchalance. "Oh, that sounds great…" you said with a smile, though it didn’t quite reach your eyes.

Rei turned to you, her gaze softening. “Would you like to join us, Y/N? I’d love to get to know you better!” Rei exclaimed, her tone sounding genuinely inviting. “Besides, the more the merrier,” she added on. Rei smiled sweetly at Suguru, playfully poking his arm. "Hey, Sugu, do you mind if Y/N tags along with us to the cafe?”

You hesitated, unsure of how to respond. Part of you wanted to decline, to spare yourself the pain of seeing Suguru with someone else, even though he had claimed that she was just a ‘friend.’ But another part of you longed to be near him, to feel his presence once again.

Before you could respond, Suguru interjected, his expression one of concern. “It’s okay, Rei. Y/N probably had plans,” he said, shooting you a sympathetic glance.

You couldn't help but feel a mix of emotions at Suguru's words. On one hand, you were hurt that he seemed to be avoiding the situation and diverting the plan. On the other hand, you understood that things had changed between the two of you, and it was no longer the same as it used to be.

It made you wonder if Suguru had ever truly loved you the way you had loved him.

‘I mean, who would want their ex to barge in while you’re in the middle of a potential date?’ You thought as you tried to play his reluctance off.

“I-I think I’ll pass, thanks,” you replied with a forced smile. “I have some errands to run anyway.”

That was a lie.

You knew that once you got home, all you would do was collapse into bed and sleep the day away. Running errands was the last thing on your mind.

“Awh! That’s a shame. Maybe next time?” Rei offered, a genuine smile on her face. You quickly returned a small nod, avoiding eye contact with her.

“Well, we better get going now. It was nice to catch up with you, Y/N,” Suguru said politely, before turning his back against you.

A simple “bye” was all you could mutter as you watched the love of your life walk away from your life yet again.

As Rei and Suguru made their way towards the cafe, the sight of his arm on the small of her back sent a shiver down your spine. Memories of your relationship with Suguru flooded back, the good times and the heartbreak. It was strange to see him with someone else, especially with someone like Rei. They seemed so natural together, as if they had been together for years.

You couldn't help but feel guilty for feeling so jealous of Rei, especially considering how kind and sweet she had been towards you despite the fact that you had only met her for the first time today. Her genuine warmth and friendly nature made you feel welcomed and at ease, yet seeing her with Suguru ignited a surge of envy within you that you found hard to suppress

Who could blame you though? For love makes people do crazy things.

You loved Suguru so much. No, you still love Suguru as much as you did when you were dating him. He was the one that you thought you were meant to be with — you wholeheartedly believed the pair of you were ‘soulmates’, as one would say. He was someone who understood you like no other.

But that was all in the past now.

Seeing Suguru with someone new, someone who made him laugh and smile the way you used to, was a harsh reminder of what you had lost.

His absence from your life had been a tough pill to swallow after two whole years of being together.

It took him a couple of weeks to go off and court her.

You couldn't help but let out a bitter laugh at the irony of it all, as you continued on your own path, trying to push aside the nagging thoughts of what could have been.

Sure, he claimed they were ‘just friends’, but actions always spoke louder than words.

You had the last two years by his side, sharing moments, dreams, and countless memories. Now, seeing him move on while you still cling to the remnants of what once was, it's a bitter pill to swallow. Despite the hurt and the longing, you know deep down that sometimes, love simply isn't enough to sustain a relationship. But oh, how you still miss him, with every fiber of your being, even as you try to convince yourself to let go and move forward.

Sometimes, love isn’t enough to keep a relationship going.

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girlboybug · 1 year

Text

Shades of Cool

“my baby lives in shades of cool, cold heart and hands of aptitude.”

or the one where joel can’t seem to stay away from you despite his efforts to. but it’s not like he tried very hard to begin with.

what’s playing 🎧 : shades of cool by lana del rey

pairing : joel miller x female!reader

word count : 9k

CONTENT WARNINGS : SMUT, creampie, breeding kink if u squint, oral f receiving, fingering, loss of virginity, virginity kink if u squint yet again, tummy bulge, unspecified age gap and joel kind of has a thing for it, unprotected sex, (pls wear a condom guys im just a mf on tumblr) multiple orgasms, a tad of overstimulation, allusions to male masturbation, dirty talk, pet names, mating press, prone bone, light dom/sub dynamics, reader def has some unresolved daddy issues mean!joel but theres some soft joel

TRIGGER WARNINGS : minor character death/reference to his death but he literally doesn't exist in the show i promise, canon-typical violence, mentions of blood, mentions of guns, implied/references to sexual harassment

a/n : this is my first time uploading to tumblr, forgive me if my layout is funky lol, anyways pls enjoy <3 read the second part here

you swallowed hard when you saw joel making his way towards the alleyway you two routinely met up in. watching as he did his typical side to side glance, casual in presence but it was muscle memory for him to ensure the safety of his environment no matter it’s location or the mundaneness of it.

you quite disliked the feeling that pricked your chest and quickly spread inside the cavity, overflowing up into your throat and drowning out any coherent thoughts in your mind whenever you saw joel.

it was annoying. pathetic even. just a silly schoolgirl crush you hoped would go away in time.

you put aside the fluttering feelings for later, and waved, catching his attention. he sent a curt nod, rubbing his palms together before pushing them into his denim pockets. “hey.” he greeted you, if you could really call it that.

you took whatever you could get from him, so you smiled, parroting it back with a nervous politeness.

“do you have the uh…” you trailed off, feeling embarrassed that you struggled to even verbalize what you were trading.

he raised a brow, folding his arms over his chest, looking at you expectingly. “i got it. you got the rations?” he finished speaking for you and you nodded enthusiastically, hurriedly pulling out the thick wad of rations you worked your ass off for.

he shut his eyes with exasperation for a few seconds before hovering his larger hand over the wad, miraculously dwarfing your own hand. “don’t wave it around kid, jesus,” he sighed, shaking his head while palming it and sliding it away into his back pocket.

“sorry…” you muttered embarrassedly.

he didn’t reply, and instead handed you a box, bright purple and pink and your gaze slowly rose up to his face with a slightly ajar mouth. “uh. joel.” you started, voice leading into an upward trail of confusion.

“if i wanted tampons i could have easily gotten this myself.” you wanted to hide the slight irritation in your tone but he caught on to it, unfolding his arms to jab the top of the box with his index finger. “how about you open it smartass.” he instructed dryly, moving backward and refolding his arms.

your eyes lingered on him tryingly for a few more seconds, huffing quietly to yourself before flipping the cardboard flap up.

again. tampons.

you tilted it towards him and he dragged his hand down his face tiredly. he dug his hand into the box, the tampons shoved to the sides, revealing a small pistol.

your mouth fell open into a comical O shape, laughing in awe. “oh!” you giggled and joel stared at you blankly, already feeling a hankering for a straight shot of whiskey at the bright and early hour of 8:30am.

“very creative.” you beamed and it seemed as though joel fought back a smile behind a glare. at least, you told yourself that.

“just enough for gullible people.” he pushed at a button of yours, just a little, and you paused for a second, shooting him a playful glare. “whatever,” you exhaled through a quiet chuckle.

“thank you joel, i appreciate the um. tampons, i was running low.” you played along with the bit and he rolled his eyes, nodding, already ready to go back home.

“sure thing.” he was about to turn and walk out of the alleyway but something held him in his spot.

he took in a deep inhale before making eye contact with you, rendering you back into your nervous state from when he first arrived.

“why do you need a pistol? we’ve only ever traded for small things. why the sudden big order?” he has absolutely no clue why he’s asking you this, or rather, he has no idea why he’s letting himself ask this.

he shouldn’t care. he doesn’t.

you stiffened, straightening your back and holding the box to your stomach, hands cupping the bottom of it. “just to keep at my place. thought i’d feel safer with it.” you answered truthfully, making sure to not go further into detail.

his squinted eyes stay on you for awhile, unsure of what you needed to feel safe from. “are you uh…in any trouble?” he asks and you feel a little excitement ignite in your lower belly.

is he worried about you?

“no! no not at all, i just…i don’t know,” you try to laugh it off but the silence between you two just feels heavy instead. “why do you ask?” you question and he shrugged.

“if you’re in trouble, i don’t need it somehow coming back to me. i got enough shit i need to worry about.” he answered and the bubble inside you popped and deflated almost immediately.

“oh, well no need to worry about that. it’s nothing like that, you’ll be fine.” you decided to end the conversation there, a cold feeling of humiliation that prods at your shoulders and throat alerting you that it’s best to just walk away before you can say anything else that might make the situation more unbearable.

“thanks joel.” you added, quickly making your way out the alleyway. “be careful with that thing.” he called out after you, and you feel the bubble slowly start to shamelessly inflate itself once more.

maybe he does care. even if it’s just a little.

—

you hid the box in the shoddy nightstand you had lugged up into your apartment from off the street one night, and exhaled lowly, pursing your lips. “this is good.” you stated to yourself.

the whole reason why you wanted a gun, was kind of useless if you really put some actual thought into it.

it really was just for the comfort of your mind, putting the nerves you had at ease. like a security blanket of sorts.

fedra soldiers occasionally conduct inspections, making a mess of people’s homes to look for any contraband, firefly propaganda, weapons, anything that so much acts as an eyesore to them is grounds for permanent confiscation.

there’s a specific solider that just makes you uncomfortable, makes your skin prickle up into sharp goosebumps and makes your stomach churn like dry gears rubbing up against each other.

the way his eyes follow you around, rejoicing in his power over you and how you cowered away from him.

they come in as pairs to inspect and even if they didn’t, he was still taller, stronger, heavily armed and trained and could kill you in front of a crowd of people and still face no consequences. so a singular witness wouldn't stop him from breaking the rules.

if anything, you’ve probably just put yourself in more danger carrying a weapon. but you felt that if you had it, you maybe had a fighting chance in case push came to shove.

you collected yourself into your very depressing excuse of a bed, lifting the fraying crotched blanket over your body, pretending you were anything less than semi uncomfortable.

the next morning, you woke up with a slightly sore feeling that resided in just about every crevice of your body but you ignore it, as it’s a common thing to wake up to if you’ve got what basically feels like laying on a napkin as a bed, and using what feels like an even thinner napkin as a blanket.

you readied yourself to participate in street clean up, since you had to take on more shifts than usual to make up for the hefty chunk of rations you gave to joel.

—

a bandana resided around your nose, neatly but tightly tied behind your head, doing…definitely not enough to cover the stench of cleaning the sludge off the streets.

"the fuck would i need coffee beans for asshole? hit me up when you’ve actually got good shit to trade.” you overheard two guys a few feet away from you bickering, your ears perking up at the mention of coffee beans.

you remembered joel vaguely mentioning how he’d kill for a cup of coffee, and you agreed on that sentiment, even though you’ve never once had coffee. the point being, he’d been out of coffee for awhile, unable to find anyone who has it, and you figured maybe scoring him a bag would be a nice sign of gratitude for the pistol.

you pulled down your bandana, walking over to the guy once the other one walked off. “hi, um i didn’t mean to eavesdrop but i heard you have coffee beans? i’d be willing to trade for them.”

“i don’t take kindly to nosy—“ he cut himself off mid sentence once he turned to look at you, his eyes dragging up and down your body and you wondered in that moment if it was worth the hassle of talking to this. thing.

but then you thought of joel, and how maybe he’d smile at you, thank you with a tight bear hug and suddenly, it did all seem worth it.

“yeah, yeah i’d definitely be happy to trade with you,” he grinned and you laughed, trying to hide your disgust with fake excitement. “great! what would you want for it? i have some spare shampoo bars, a pair of wool socks i was saving for winter, or—“

he cut you off this time, leaning into your space closer and you instinctively backed away. “i was thinking maybe something different.” he alluded to something that made cleaning up literal shit off the street seem a lot more pleasant.

your face fell and you lifted up your bandana. “yeah, nevermind. thanks anyway.”

you turned on your heel and he groaned, calling after you. “the socks…” he huffed, rubbing the side of his chin. “are they soft?” he mumbled, avoiding eye contact.

you tugged down the bandana again, smiling brightly. “very!”

—

you scheduled another meet up with joel, excited to gift him the bag of coffee beans.

you were slightly sad to let go of the socks, your feet always got so cold in the winter and the nights were already starting to increase in frigidness, but it’s okay, you could always find another pair of socks again, but you didn’t know if you’d have another chance to pleasantly surprise joel like this.

against joel’s typical judgment, he said to just stop by his apartment, feeling too tired to lug himself down into the alleyway again.

but all you heard from that was he trusted you enough into his personal space. which, as much as joel would deny it, is true.

he could clearly envision you apologizing to a fly for so much as being in its way, so inviting you over posed as nowhere near a threat.

you knocked at his door, hiding the bag behind your back before he opened it. the wind got knocked out of you once more at the sight of him. he was very much older than you, easily the age of a man who could be your father, but that didn’t erase any of his attractiveness.

in the deepest part of your subconscious, you knew that that’s what added onto it.

“hi!” you chirped and he stepped to the side, widening his door to let you in. “hi.” he repeated, drier but, not unhappily.

“what’d you wanna trade for again?” he asked, his hand rubbing the side of his stubbly jaw, and you had to look away, knowing you’d just watch him in silence if you didn’t.

“actually,” you hummed, nearly bursting at the seems with glee. he watched you curiously, unaware of the slight smile on his face as he watched you tip toe closer with your hand still behind your back.

“i didn’t come by to trade. i got you a gift!” he rested his palms behind him on the small table, his broad shoulders seeming even broader now and you wanted to run your hands across the expanse of them.

“a gift?” he asked, breaking you out of your trance. he sounded genuinely shocked, almost unable to believe you. “mhm!” you nodded, a smile still etched on your features.

“close your eyes, and open your hands.” you instructed, and he tilted the side of his head to you, wordlessly saying really?

you nudged your chin, motioning for him to listen, your way of replying with yes, really.

he eyed you before shaking his head, standing up straight and closing his eyes, his palms bared out for you, muttering a quiet, i have no idea why i’m listenin’ to you.

you plopped the bag of coffee into his hands, sing songing a soft “now open!”

he opened his eyes, his lips parting in awe. he laughed out of disbelief, and your heart soared with joy as you saw him smile, and widely at that.

“kid…you…why? i mean, god, thank you, but why?” he asked and you shrugged, rocking back and forth on your heel to your toes. “take it as a thanks for my pist-i mean tampons.” you joked and he chuckled, shaking his head and putting the beans down onto the table.

“well, thank you, that’s mighty kind of you.” he looked downward at you, and you looked back up at him, trying to memorize the way his lips were curled, the sweet lines by his eyes and the way he just seemed so happy by such a small act of kindness.

“no biggie!” you replied, and he darted his eyes away for a moment before turning back to you. “do you know how to use your gun?” he asked and you felt your face grow hot with slight embarrassment.

“uh. i mean you just aim and pull the trigger right?” you asked honestly and he blinked a few times before shaking his head. “okay so you don’t.” and you squinted at him. “i could teach you. get you some extra bullets too.” he remedied the half joking comment with his offer and you perked up.

“yeah? you would?” you asked excitedly and he nodded. “‘course. you just went from tolerated, to slightly more tolerated in my book. so i’m gonna help you not accidentally shoot yourself in the foot.”

you didn’t like how you actually felt a twinge of sadness at his obvious joke about only tolerating you. he was kidding, but sometimes it was hard to tell because he had the same monotone, slightly annoyed at everything everyone has to say, kind of voice.

and you were a sensitive person, and even the most harmless jokes could manage to sting you.

“well jeez aren’t you sweet.” you complimented with sarcasm. joel threw on his flannel, ignoring your comment. you stepped aside while he made his way to the door.

“you comin?” he looked at you, opening the door behind him, waiting for you to follow. you turned around to look behind you stupidly, then back to him. “what?” you asked confusedly and he fought the urge to roll his eyes and take back his offer.

“we’re gonna start now.” he inclined his head out the door, motioning for you to come along. and who were you to decline doing anything with joel.

—

joel was here. in your apartment. in your space, in your air. he was sitting on your bed, the place where you’d occasionally, frequently shove your fingers into places you just knew joel would be able to reach with no effort.

he ran his fingers over the barrel of the gun, drumming against its ridges and for a moment you felt a bit envious over the literal inanimate object.

“cmere,” he patted the space next to him, waiting for you to be seated so he could get started.

with wobbly legs you made your way to him, smoothing over your jeans in an attempt to secretly wipe away your clammy palms.

“show me how you hold it.” he placed it in your hands and it felt foreign to the touch. it was heavier than you expected it to be but you tried to conceal your inexperience by holding it the way you’ve seen others handle their firearms.

you pointed it at the door, pretending that soldier was in front of you, finger on the trigger and hands at the bottom of it, supporting your grasp.

he observed your hold, a low hmm coming from the back of his throat. “not terrible.” he adjusted your hands, your skin latching onto his heat, claiming it as yours as his body hovered around your side.

“how’s that feel?” he asked and you cleared your throat, blinking a few times and avoiding his close stare. “it uh, it feels better.” you answered and he clicked his tongue, nodding curtly to himself.

“alright. now, when you run out of bullets, the magazine at the bottom might drop out but if it doesn’t, you’re gonna take it out and reload, you wanna be fast if you’re in the middle of, well whatever situations got you needing to pull out a gun.” there was a slight cadence of a joke in his gun lesson 101, and it made a giddy feeling return to your tummy.

he reached in his back pocket, pulling out what you assumed he meant by magazine.

he explained the logistics of your newly owned weapon, trying to use terms you’d be able to follow along with, not unaware of how you were watching and listening intently, hanging on to every word he spoke.

you were too damn obvious.

—

you saw more of joel after that, bumping into him in places you usually didn’t see him, yet seemingly excited every time you met.

his aloof stare slowly turned softer when it landed on you, maybe it never changed at all but to you it definitely felt different.

he swore it was you that had been following him, an air of playfulness in his accusations of you stalking him, but really it was him.

he unable to admit to himself that he wandered around the areas he knew you were usually found in, wanting to scold you for having such an easy routine to follow but he kept it to himself.

he watched you walk beside him, taking in the sights of the town, wondering how you could possibly appreciate the hellhole that surrounded you all.

“so how’s the coffee? any good?” you asked, turning back to look at him, feeling a hushed breath pause in your throat once you saw he was already looking at you.

a peek of a smile ghosted over his face. “it’s good. i, i appreciate that you did that. i hope you didn’t have to trade too much for it.” guilt resided in him at the thought of you having to give more than you had just for coffee beans. he felt he wasn’t worth all that effort.

you shook your head, laughing lightly at the memory of the trade. “no no don’t worry, just a pair of socks. they were these brown wool socks that were so soft, so i’d say it was a pretty fair trade.”

“i’ll be on the look out for a pair like that then.” he was already figuring out who he could trade with to get you another pair of socks. “no it’s okay you don’t have to it’s-“

“hey,” his voice felt rich, calling your attention back to him. your chest went tight. “yeah?” you whispered back.

“shut up. i’m gettin’ the socks.” there was a backbone of sternness in his lighthearted promise.

you sucked on your bottom lip through a grin before you spoke again.

“i have a confession.” you exhaled, feigning dramatics and he tilted his head towards you, watching you with worried eyes. “yeah?”

“i lied. i’ve never had coffee before.” you lowered your head with faux shame and he gasped, shaking his head with disapproval. he paused for a moment, then turned around.

you caught up with him, holding onto his arm, feeling hot at the taut feeling of his limb, and how he didn’t push you off. he just peered down at you, keeping you there with him. “jeez i didn’t think you’d take such offense to that,” you breathed out through a chuckle.

“inexcusable. you’re tryin it when we get home.” the twang in his accent was something so attractive, and it only had you feeling more and more willing to do whatever he wanted. you’d drink acid if he asked of it from you in that deep southern drawl.

you two walked back to his place, shedding a layer out of many, holding onto it as you trailed in behind him.

he glanced over at you, then your coat. “set it down somewhere, you can have a seat.” he pointed at the round table and you quietly thanked him, hanging your coat over the back of the chair before sliding it out and sitting in it.

“i remember you have a sweet tooth. damn near talked my head off about trading for a bag of hard candies a few months ago, so i reckon you’d like it sweet.” he mostly talked to himself when he said that, fondly remembering the way you rattled on about how you were craving for caramel drops.

“you remember that?” you were just about swooning, unable to hide it even when joel walked back over to you, two mugs in each hand of his. “how could i not? you never let me forget it.” he set the mug down in front of you, sipping at his as he leaned back into the chair in front of you.

you picked it up, hugging the warmth of it with your palm. you took a light sip, your eye shutting, a low quiet moan leaving your lips from around the mug once the taste landed on your tongue.

joel stirred in his seat at the sound, busying himself with drinking from his cup to avoid making any kind of facial expressions.

“joel,” you crooned and he felt weak. “you like it?” he asked, his lips still curled over the rim of his mug. “it’s so good, i understand why you like it so much.”

“well, i don’t make it as sweet as that, but yeah, coffees good. not a lot of people agree.” he shrugged and you set your mug down in front of you. “can i taste yours?”

he slid it to you and you lifted it, tasting it and almost immediately wanting to spit it out. you quickly gave it back to him, sipping the sweeter coffee to cleanse your offended palette.

“yeah, that tastes like shit, i don’t know how you drink that.” you smacked your tongue against the roof of your mouth, the burnt taste not quite leaving you just yet.

he rolled his eyes, taking a loud obnoxious slurp. “my tastebuds are just mature.”

“mature for what? shit? once you hit a certain age do just you grow accustomed to crappy tasting things?” you were dipping into a more casual way of speaking to joel, causing his gaze that rested on you to turn into a view of amusement.

“rich comin’ from the kid who still eats like she’s 5.” he rested his arm against the back of his chair, and you expired, feeling a bit defensive of being called a child.

“i’m not a kid.” you muttered and he chuckled. “alright.” he agreed in sentiments but not in actuality.

breaking the comfortable silence that filled the room you and joel shared, a loud bang rang from against the door. joel slid from out his chair, hurriedly pacing towards the door.

before he could even open it, you already knew it was one of fedra’s soldiers. things were starting to feel a little too lax, it was only a matter of time until they came knocking down doors again.

your throat went dry, stomach cinching with anxiety once he stepped inside, the same soldier that had you saving up your rations week after week to be able to afford the pistol from joel.

his eyes flickered between you and joel, scoffing to himself. “what’s this?” he asked you, ignoring joel who stood right in front of him.

“nothing.” you answered, intimidation and fear already prickling at your skin and racing down your spine.

joel stood in front of you, shielding you away from him, and slowly, the fear lifted itself itself away from you, but not fully. not while he’s still here.

“aren’t there usually two of you who do these searches?” joel questioned, watching as the solider jabbed at various things of joel’s with the tip of his rifle.

“partners out sick. so y’all get the pleasure of havin just me.” he flashed an ugly grin at you, bending to the side to see your uncomfortable face behind joel’s back.

he walked around, haphazardly lifting and tossing things about.

“oh?” he bent down, squatting by joel’s bed. “what’s this?” he waved around a baggy full of white powder. joel stiffened, his nostrils flaring in anger.

“that’s not mine and you know it.” and surprisingly it actually wasn’t.

joel had just sold the last of his pills to a sad sap unable to sleep without them, and that was a month ago. the asshole was planting drugs on him.

“this is not only grounds for confiscation but imprisonment. tough spot you’re in miller.” joel exhaled angrily from a quiet ragged breath.

“unless,” he came up to you, pushing past joel to cup your chin. “she wants to, convince me why i shouldn’t take you down for this contraband.” you flinched from his touch but it only made him hold on tighter.

joel snatched his wrist away, stepping back in front of you. “you don’t have to involve her. what do you want? rations, half of my next haul? what?” he gritted and the solider just laughed.

“you think i don’t have easy access to all that? i want something you can’t easily trade for.” he leaned to the side, waving at you.

joel pushed him backward, triggering the response of a rifle being shoved in his face. joel didn’t so much as waver, grabbing the neck of the firearm, pointing it away from him while his foot came and rammed down onto the front of his shin, successfully knocking him down with a loud wail of pain.

it happened so fast all you could do was sit and watch, frozen in place as joel lost himself on top of the solider, pounding and pounding and pounding his fists in relentlessly, not stopping despite the ache trickling over across his knuckles.

you heard a sick squelch followed by cracking noises and you knew that should’ve made you fear joel. it should’ve made you run out the door and never look back. but it did the opposite. you never wanted to stay more.

you watched with wide pupils as he rose up from the beaten and bloodied solider, breathing hard and loud, stumbling upward to a leant stance, staring at the lifeless solider on his wood floors.

he wiped his nose with the clean, unbloodied slate of his forearm, before dropping it back to his side to lean forward and spit over the body.

he turned back to you, scanning your face for any hurt, fear or disgust.

but there was none.

before you could say anything, he spoke aloud his thoughts. “i gotta get rid of the body.”

“do you need help?” you extended a hand willing to assist and joel shook his head a hard no. “you saw enough, you don’t need to see more. i’ll be back.”

you stood up, pressing a hand to his chest, looking at him with watery eyes. he wanted to wipe them away from you, but he couldn’t. not with the blood that was already starting to cake under his nails.

“joel i want to help.” you admitted, soft voice trembling and joel leaned forward, his face close to yours. “you should probably go sweetheart, you don’t need to get wrapped up further in this.” his words traveled along the coast of a gentle but solid whisper.

“i don’t want to go.” your voice barely carrying itself loud enough as a reply, eyes following joel’s actions of walking away from you to roll up the soldier in a thin fraying carpet.

“you should.” is all he said, walking out the door with a body dragging behind him.

—

you went against any logical thought process whatsoever and stayed. you decided you’d make yourself useful, feeling as though the events that continually replayed in your head felt like your fault.

you sat on your knees, scrubbing at the blood that had already set in the floors.

you scrubbed until it hurt, and you kept going despite the fact. you dunked the scrubber into the bucket of soapy water turned brown, squeezing the excess onto the floor before rubbing it in.

the door clicked open and your head whipped towards it, heart leaping in your chest once you saw joel stumble in.

“hi.” you breathed and he looked at you with surprise. he saw the work you busied yourself with, locking the door before making his way to you. “what’re you doin’?” he asked gently, yet again in shock at how unabashedly kind you were to him.

“didn’t want the blood just sitting here on your floors. ‘least i could do since it’s my fault that all happened.” you sniffled, feeling guilty at what had transpired. though the guilt was there, a sense of gratitude was even larger.

he did that, for you.

he bent down to catch your watery gaze. “no, no that was not your fault. just got a little carried away. ‘don’t want you thinkin’ that you had anything to do with my choices, okay?” he leaned to the side, catching your eyes that were avoiding his. “okay?” he repeated, waiting for you to say it back to him.

“okay.” you mouthed just below a whisper. he took the bucket and the scrubber, walking to the sink. you of course, trailed behind him.

he lifted his sleeves, turning on the faucet to rinse off the dried blood on his hands.

he picked at under his nails, scraping the blood off wherever he saw it. which was, every inch of his hands.

his body faced back to you, his now cleaned hands picking up yours, seeing specks of blood and dirt splattered on your hands from cleaning his floor.

he washed you clean, and all you could do was admire him. how gentle he was taking care of you. he rinsed your skin clear of blood, drying you up and letting your hands rest back to your sides.

“i’m sorry you had to see that.” he apologized, feeling ashamed of how little he was in control of his anger in that moment.

you shook your head, hands shakily resting on his chest. “no, i don’t want you to be sorry.” you murmured, eyes landing on his lips. you swallowed back any fears that held you back from showing your affections any longer.

you leaned forward, pressing your lips to his. with a pleasant surprise, he kissed back, no hesitation in his actions. his hold fell to your waist, squeezing, pulling you into him.

he took in your air, and you gave it to him, happily, willing to offer it in all its abundance. your hand rose to his cheek, palm resting over his beard. his thumb rested on your chin, rubbing it softly.

he forced himself to pull away, his hands selfishly unable to remove themselves from your waist. “sweetheart this isn’t a good idea. you’re too young, and i’m not a good man. i think i just showed you that.” he tried to warn you, hushed and gently, with honest intentions of keeping you away from something you’d regret being involved with.

but the only thing you’d regret is never being with him.

“i’m not, and i don’t care what you do joel, i want you, all of you, want you so bad,” you all but whimpered, trying to press yourself against him more.

he was a greedy man at heart, pulling you back up for a harder kiss. there was a hot hunger that was electric between you two, a burning ignition that pulled you two in, tying an in separable twine amidst your bodies. but neither of you ever had any intentions of undoing it anyways.

he held the side of your cheek, the other traveling from your lower back to your ass, squeezing it hard, using his grip to pull you in closer, grinding up against you right there.

you were so needy for him that it rattled your bones. a wet clicking noise elicited from your mouths, tongues brushing up together messily. your chin dribbling with saliva.

you moaned in his mouth, feeling the hand that was on your cheek move to hold you by the back of your head, his tilting to kiss you deeper.

he untangled your lips, keeping himself not even an inch away, just to share the breath between you two. your tongue flicked over his lips, biting down on the bottom one before lurching forward for him once more.

he groaned in your mouth, lifting his hand to come down and spank your ass. you whined, back arching and crotch brushing up against his.

you two stumbled towards his bed, your back falling into the mattress. he crawled on top of you, ridding himself of his boots and you of yours.

his knee rested on one side of your hip, the other coming between your thighs. your chest rose up into his, your back lifting off the sheets and hands coming up to paw at his chest.

without any reservations, you rubbed against his knee, struggling to kiss him back. “feel good little girl?” he sounded gruff, strained voice trying it’s best to not moan at the way your wet little cunt managed to create a wet spot on his knee.

“so good joel,” you gaped, kissing his neck desperately.

“shouldn’t be touchin’ you like this, sweet little thing like you gettin handled by someone like me,” he breathed through a series of heavy pants, his hands wandering all along your sides, your hips, your thighs.

“don’t want anyone else but you.” you whimpered truthfully, holding his wrist and guiding his hand to your chest, right above your heart. you let it drift to the left, shuddering when he squeezed your breast.

he kissed your pulse, teeth baring out against it. he rested his hand on your lower belly, rubbing the skin under your tank top. “can i touch you?” he whispered, his beard tickling the space just below your ear.

you nodded, running your hands all along his strong back. “please,” you bucked your hips upward, begging with not only your words but your body.

he exhaled out a quiet chuckle, fingers working to undo your jeans, tugging them down until they were forgotten on the floor.

he dipped down beneath your underwear, his cock throbbing in his boxers at how wet you were. so soaked it was pathetic. he hadn’t let his hand drift down to the sweet place between those thighs of yours til then, and yet you were as wet as if he had his tongue pressed up against you.

actually, that’s not a bad idea.

he circled around your clit, watching as you revealed in it, his fingers being thicker than yours, making the sensation all the more intense.

“joel,” you repeated his name, voice wavering in breathy gasps, his fingers rolling the sensitive button of yours. he slipped a finger inside you, eyes peering up and watching as your back rose just a little, hips pressuring downward and further onto his finger, taking him all in.

“so soft,” he murmured, lowering himself to press a kiss to your hip. he rolled his hips into the mattress, trying ease the pressure building up beneath his jeans.

he was too turned on, this young pretty girl he’s had his eye on for a year was sprawled in his bed, soft and soaked cunt all ready and pliable just for him and him alone.

he could die a happy man.

his lips encircled your clit, tongue drawing around it while he pressed into a familiar spongy spot within you.

you sucked in a sharp gasp, the sweet sound turning into a high pitched whine. “please,” you sobbed, hands flying down to keep his head in place.

he fucked you with his fingers, curling right up against the spot that was making you dizzy, his tongue and lips working perfectly on your little clit.

tears flowed down your face and on his pillow, your hand coming up to your mouth trying to lessen the volume of your cries.

“j-joel, please i,” unable to formulate any sentences, you just gave up, giving in to your moans.

the way you squeezed around his fingers, sucking him with greed and need, made him wonder how that’d feel around his cock when he’d get to finally shove it in you.

he growled at the thought, sucking hard around your clit. you whimpered, pushing down onto his tongue more.

“s’too much, i cant, i,” your head rolled around his pillow, his scent, his touch, his tongue suffocating you in the most heavenly way possible.

you squirmed in his hold, unable to escape his grip, unable to escape the way his tongue pressed flat and hard up on your clit. his beard brushed up against your thighs, pulling a giggly moan from you.

“perfect little pussy,” he grunted, kissing your clit before dragging his tongue slowly, up and down languidly.

he rested his forearm over your lower tummy, pressing hard and feeling the corner of his lips perk at the way you gasped, shuddering loudly and trembling in his mouth at the action.

“joel, i think i’m—ooh,” you spoke tearfully, poor little throat already getting hoarse from crying out his name.

“feels good huh baby,” that little twang in his deep voice curled off his words just right. all you could do was whimper a shaky sogood joel s’good.

his finger pressed up against that spot inside you, his tongue on your clit being the sweetest cherry on top of the tooth rotting sundae.

you were cumming, hiccuping his name unashamedly. your plush thighs coming around to cage him in, to which he paid no mind to, if anything it excited him, his rough hands gripping your ass and pulling you deeper into his mouth.

the wind up deep inside you finally released, flickering flashes of burning hot lights spread across your limbs, slowly fizzling out as you went limp in his bed.

he didn’t let up however, his tongue grown addicted to the way your perfect clit felt on the wet muscle.

you whimpered, struggling to push him away from your cunt. it was just too good and he hadn’t had enough yet.

“joel n-no more s’too much,” you pleaded weakly, and he took slight pity, pressing one last kiss before rising back up to you.

he pressed his fingers to your lips, groaning quietly with approval at the way you took them in with no verbal orders needed.

you were so good for him, his sweet little girl.

he pulled them out, resting on your plump bottom lip before moving it out the way to kiss you. you moaned deeply into his mouth, bringing your arms around him, hands traveling up to his hair.

his salt and peppered hair felt soft, weaved through your gentle fingers. you lightly tugged on it, feeling mischief in your veins at the ministration. he growled, biting down on your lip and laughing as you yelped.

he held your jaw, pressing hard kisses all along your face, speaking stilly, his inflection so deep, so masculine, so old and wise, had you hypnotized, his words that were reserved for your ears only, were something you’d cradle to yourself forever.

“told myself i wouldn’t crack, i wouldn’t have you like this, you’re too young, you don’t know what you want, but fuck,” he dragged his fingers up your folds, chuckling to himself at the way you whimpered, curling into his touch immediately.

“now that i got you, ‘fraid i can’t let you go sweetheart. i’m a selfish man at heart.” he admitted, kissing your jaw. you just about exploded in that moment. you had no idea he felt the same for you as you did him, and it was the most powerful, enlightening feeling you’ve ever felt.

“i’m selfish too,” you whispered back, puckering your lips to kiss him. “didn’t let anyone else touch me but you. just wanted you,” you looked up at him from under your eyelashes, unaware to how that little admission made the precum collecting at his tip leak out even more.

his grasp on your hip tightened, squeezing it as he buried his face in your neck. “fuck baby, gonna give this old man a heart attack sayin’ things like that.”

your shaky hands went for his belt, tugging on it with need. “want you joel, please?” you begged, lips pressed to his ear. he didn’t need to be begged any more, he undid his belt with one hand, pulling it off his waist, letting it join the pile of your discarded jeans and boots.

before he could take himself out, your hands found themselves under his flannel, desperate and anxious to see what he’s been concealing away from you. “off, please,” and he wanted to say no, feeling not as proud in his physique as he once was about 20 years ago.

“nothin special to see baby,” he countered and you shook your head. “it’s you. it’s special to me.” you suspired airily, already feeling your tummy get tight at the thought of him hovering above you, shirtless.

he took in a deep breath, letting you unbutton his flannel.

you undid each button, trying your best to not rip them clean off despite your rushing efforts. you slid it off his body, exhaling in awe at the sight in front of you.

you sucked on your bottom lip, hands traveling across his broad shoulders, fingers tracing his collarbones, dragging around the scarred areas from past wounds, admiring the few freckles on his chest that trail up to his shoulders.

he watched you, never having felt so admired before. “enjoyin’ yourself baby?” he teased, his thumb rubbing over your chin.

“mhm,” you nodded, not caring how it looked to be gawking at him.

you could feel the muscle from the layer of life and age over his stomach, your eyes then falling to the bulge of his biceps, instantly growing obsessed, squeezing at the muscles.

“you’re so beautiful joel.” you spoke with such true sincerity and he tittered quietly, shaking his head. “thank you baby,”

your wandering hands finally fell to his jeans, undoing the button and zipper, eager to see what else he’d been keeping away from you.

he let you, more than ready to feel your touch in the place he craved the most. he was tired of having to fuck his calloused fist, trying hard to pretend it was your cute hand touching him.

you pulled him out, feeling your jaw go slack at the length of it all. “jesus joel,” you swallowed hard, steadily jerking him off, feeling slightly unsure if you’re doing it right. you were telling the truth, when you said you’d never let anyone touch you, too hopelessly in love with joel to even imagine allowing anyone to see you in the way he’s got you.

he grunted, unintentionally bucking his hips into the tunnel of your hand. he was thick, heavy in your clutch, veins running along the side of it, his tip round and fat, almost red with droplets of precum leaking out.

“gonna show you what those little boys could never give you,” he promised, and you believed him, gazing at the way he reluctantly pulled away from your hold, knowing if he let you stroke him any longer he’d cum all over your hand.

he circled your clit with the head of his cock, shuddering a semblance of a breathy moan at the sensation. “gonna be a bit of a stretch baby, tell me if it’s too much okay? i’ll try to go slow.” he kissed his promises of gentleness into your temple.

he inched in, hands around either side of your head, foreheads pushed together while your mouth fell open, sucking in all the air in the room. the stretch was very unfamiliar, but not unwelcomed.

you held onto his shoulders for support, grasping onto them tightly, pretty plump trembling lips crying out moans that would replay in joel’s head on lonely nights. you felt fuller than you ever have before joel was even fully inside you.

he was nudging up against spots in you that you had no idea could feel so good, and if he angled his hips any higher, the fat head of his cock would be kissing your cervix.

“can barely fit myself in ya’ baby,” he groaned, head falling from your forehead to bury itself in your neck, kissing your hot skin to try to calm him down before he lost control and rammed himself inside you.

your calves rested on his hips, whimpering while trying to lift yourself up in an attempt to get him to push himself further in.

“more joel, please?” your pleas were accompanied by sponged kisses just below his ear. “gonna take it all for me baby?” he questioned you, inching in just that much deeper, and you shut your eyes, nails already beginning to crescent themselves in his back. “mhm, gonna take it all,” you swore, more than eager to have him fully within you, as close as could be.

he jutted his hips in, knocking the wind out of you. you bit down on his shoulder, whining a drool filled mess with the way he started to fuck you, rough hardened hands molding softly around the curves of your waist.

he was bathing in the way your little cunt took him in, squeezing around him so good just like he knew you would. he took his time, rocking into you in and out, holding your shaking body close to him.

you could feel every ridge and vein in you, hooked onto the way he filled you up, stretching you beyond belief, making you bounce upward with every movement.

his hands slid down over the smooth skin of your thighs, widening them further open before pushing them up, growing impatient, achingly hungry to be deeper in you. you struggled for air at his fast actions, eyes immediately rolling back at the way he began to fuck into you.

“can’t help myself, m’sorry baby, pussy’s too good, shit,” a gruff sigh of relief leaving his mouth at the way you took him in. you didn’t care, you were thrilled to take whatever he gave you, and however hard he saw fit.

“feels s’good, feel so full,” you cried, translucent tears free falling, the aggressive pistons of his hips causing your swollen clit to ache, begging to be touched.

“feel me right here huh baby?” he rubbed over the bulge in your tummy and you squealed, wriggling away from the overwhelming stimulation. “ha,” you strung out, arching up into him.

“yeah, you do,” he taunted breathlessly, loving how you were a wreck beneath him. “in so deep joel,” you mumbled against his shoulder and he kissed your hair, nodding knowingly. “i know babygirl but you’re takin me so well,” he praised, feeling so proud of his sweet girl taking his cock like a pro.

“never gonna let anyone see you like this?” he pressed deep there, corners of his lips curling when you weep, squeezing at his biceps. “never gonna let anyone have you like this?” you shook your head, sobbing a string of no joel no, never, just you.

“perfect, tight fuckin’ cunt is all for me, aint sharin’ with no one,” he held you by the back of your thighs even further, stressing how serious he was, set on fucking himself into your soaked hole until there was a permanent shape of him within you. a shape no man could ever fit into.

sobs of uncontrollable pleasure were the only thing you could feel in your veins, pumping your blood full of dopamine. his balls tightened, hitting the fullness of your ass, and he let himself grow sporadic, let himself take you. his fingers found your desperate clit, chuckling to himself when you croon tearfully, thanking him pathetically for touching you.

“can i cum, please?” your requests only made him twitch inside you, his sweet girl was so polite. “go ahead baby, let it out,” he leaned down to kiss you, swallowing up your moans and cries.

your body jerked under him, the tight vice of your cunt gripping onto him while he rubbed over your clit, pulling out the second wave of an orgasm from you.

you broke apart from his lips, still just a breadth of a gasp away from them, brushing up against the ghost of a kiss as you pressed your forehead to his, sobbing his name while your body trembled from how hard you were cumming.

“shit,” he slammed a hand against the wall above your head, shoving himself impossibly further in you, your legs shaking on either side of him. “good fuckin’ girl, squeezing me so goddamn good,” he fucked you through your orgasm, kneading over your breasts, groping at them and pinching at your pebbling nipples.

you fell limp, letting yourself drown in the unraveling lengths of your climax.

“gonna cum baby, where d’you want it?” he asked, feeling his lower stomach start to tighten up. “inside, wanna feel all of you,” you whined, kissing all along his shoulder and collarbones, messy and ravenous.

his face fell to the crook of your neck, biting down on your soft flesh when he came, impaling you once, twice, ending it with one last hard thrust as he came in you, pumping you full of his cum.

he didn't feel himself soften inside you, but with each of the passing minutes he decided he’d better pull out then or else he’d never leave. you winced from the removal, arms coming around to hold him with a clinginess.

he collapsed on top of you, and you sighed contently, the full weight of him resting on you could’ve honestly sent you into the deepest nap you’d ever have.

you felt his cock, still hardened on your thigh. with sleepy eyes you looked up at him, lips on his stubbly jaw when you spoke. "you're still hard," you murmured. his fingers drew up and down your spine, and you shivered, arching yourself into him.

"that's okay, it'll go down soon." his throat got tight when he felt you wrap your hand around him once more. "we don't...have to ignore it." you trailed off, bitten lips pressing delicate kisses laced with ulterior motives into his tanned skin.

you wanted joel to use you as many times as he wanted to, a new compulsion flowing rampantly in your veins. now that you had finally gotten a taste of joel, you wanted to gorge yourself on him.

"you sure you can take it?" he asked through a hushed breath of arousal. you nodded, kissing at his lips with need.

he didn't need to be told twice, he repositioned you, letting you fall back onto his pillow with him hovering above you. he rolled you onto your stomach, holding you by your hip to lift you just enough for him to shove his flannel right against your cunt.

his rough palms encased your ass, groping at the thick flesh. he dipped down, spreading your ass and watching as his cum poured out of you. he groaned quietly to himself. you whimpered, turning to look over your shoulder as joel pushed his fingers inside, shoving his cum back into you. your chin dropped, face falling back into his pillow when he pumped his fingers inside you, chuckling darkly to himself at the way your ass squirmed against him.

every little swivel your hips made was met with friction from his flannel on your clit. the hem of it just so happened to be pressed right there. he slapped his cock over on your ass, exhaling loudly at the way it jiggled from his actions.

he aligned himself once more with your little hole, pushing himself in with ease due to the slick left from a mixture of his cum and yours. you whined, hands flying backward, desperate for any solace from his hands in yours. he held your wrists at the small of your back with one hand, the other supporting his weight to lean forward when he pushed himself all the way inside you. you cried out, his name falling out of your mouth like a mantra, your legs trembling beneath him.

he was in you so much deeper this way, stretching you out more than you thought he already could. his hips snapped up against your ass, fully within you and hitting every single tingly spot inside you along the way.

you were already out of breath, your lungs and brain vacant of anything except for him, for joel. "feel you in my tummy," you hiccuped, tilting your head to look at him through teary eyes. he breathed out a lazy, cocky laugh, moving forward to kiss your forehead, unintentionally shoving his cock in even deeper, feeling a sense of pride at the way you gasped and whimpered at the deep intrusion.

"i know huh baby?" he chuckled in your ear, and you shivered, feeling your face grow warm from how flustered he made you feel. he was so dirty, any filters he once had were gone, the tight grip your cunt had on his cock made him downright ruthless.

he pressed his hands at your lower back, letting yours fall free to cling onto his sheets. he held you down that way, fucking into you with a newfound source of energy, his grey hairs falling over his forehead, sweat glistening over the ripples of muscles along his biceps and abdomen, his whole being going into pounding himself into you.

he wanted you to be so full of him that everyone would know it just by looking at you. the possessiveness he tried to suppress for so long had come out, and he wasn't sure if he could go back to hiding it again. but that wasn't on his mind, not when you were clenching around him, sobbing his name loud enough for everyone outside to hear.

his grunting fell to your ears, it was near pornographic, including the way you bounced with each and every thrust of his, just watching it made his chest get tight.

he needed you closer.

he pulled you back up from under your arms, keeping you flush against his chest while he continued fucking you. you were growing limp, body worn out from the rigor he put you through. but he held onto you, keeping you in his arms. his arm went under your tits, a sneaky hand coming up and groping at one, pinching at the nipple.

he buried his face in your neck, filling your ear with the low growl of his groans. "such a good girl, letting me fuck you like this, but i think you like it, and you know what else?," he drew in a heavy breath, "i think you like being fucked like a little ragdoll," you couldn't answer, he was right, but you could hardly focus on any words, his cock rendering you a teary eyed moaning mess.

"can't even respond when spoken to," he slowed the roll of his hips, hitting you in deep and slow, letting you hear him instead of the loud wet rhythm of your cunt being fucked into. "that's okay, i'll still take care of you," he chuckled, returning back to his rough pace.

"so good, make me feel so good joel," you managed to finally cry out in a series of strewn moans. his fingers trailed themselves down to your clit, rubbing in tight little circles. " i know baby, cum for me, show me how good i make you feel."

you wriggled around in his hold, your third orgasm of the night was thick in heft, a heavy wave of intense stimulation clearing your vision and leaving a white glittering hue instead. you felt joel everywhere, from the way he was buried in your cunt, to the way his hips were clasped over the curve of your ass, fitting into you like a puzzle piece.

the fervent circles being drawn over your clit was the thing that pushed you over, your head falling backward onto his shoulder, his turn to be serenaded by a string of your pretty moans. "good babygirl, did so good for me." he cooed in your ear, pressing a kiss behind it. "thank you," you meekly replied in a breathless voice.

you were the weakest you've ever felt, your poor spent body still being held upright as joel chased down his own orgasm. "gonna let me cum in you again baby? want more of it?" he panted in your ears. "please, want it joel, please,"

he gripped onto your hips, feeling his own stutter, before he pushed in deeply, stilling inside as he came in thick ropes. he finally softened, slowly pulling out of you. you winced again at the loss, feeling suddenly cold and empty. you collapsed on his bed, reaching out for him.

he laid beside you, pulling your leg up and over his waist, running a hand up the expanse of your thigh. your eyes fell shut tiredly, enjoying the comfortable sound of the two of you trying to catch your breaths.

a part of you was worried he was going to break the silence, afraid he'd call the whole thing a mistake, and lecture you on how he isn't the type of man who does relationships. you knew all of that, you just hoped he wouldn't say it and just let you soak in the moment.

almost nervously, his hand came to dance across your cheekbone softly, wanting to memorize the way your skin felt to his. "do you regret that?" he murmured and you opened your eyes, shocked at the question.

you leaned into his hand, curling your own over his. "no, never joel, why would you ask that?"

he sighed, scooting closer to you. "I'm not a good man, sweetheart, i'm giving you a chance to leave." he spoke above an octave of silence. you frowned, shaking your head. "i don't care about anything that you've done in the past or what you'll do in the future. i just...want to be here, with you, in any way you'll let me." you admitted, wishing you could say the one thing you've been harboring for a year, but you knew you needed to keep that to yourself just a little longer.

"if i had a bigger conscious i wouldn't let you," his hands pulled you into the hold of his arm that came over your waist. "lucky for me then that you're not the good man you claim to be." you whispered, the scent of coffee on your breath enveloping his senses, and in that moment, he had a realization.

he thought about how nice, how domestic it would be to wake up and share a cup of coffee with you every morning, before you had to face the day, at least you could share a moment of peace together.

"yeah," a trace of a smile grew over his lips. "you're right. i'm not." he rolled on top of you, cupping your cheeks in his large palms. "you're makin' an unwise choice little girl," a quiet rumble rested on your lips.

your arms came around his shoulders and you sighed a half laugh. "i know. i don't care."

#pedro pascal #pedro pascal joel miller #joel miller smut #joel miller x reader #joel miller x f!reader #joel miller x female reader #the last of us hbo #the last of us smut

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dazedandconfused-15 · 27 days

Text

Heaven's in your eyes

This is to answer a request I received from an anonymous user a couple of months ago “Billy asks shy reader out and is protective over her”, for some reason I can't directly respond to their post still getting used to Tumblr. Sorry for taking a while to write this one. Anyway, I got a little bit carried away and turned it into a short fic, I just loved the whole concept. I’ll definitely post a part 2. Comments and constructive opinions are always appreciated 🩷

Part 1

You have always watched him from a distance.

There was something magnetic about him. Where he was, energy swirled.

You have never spoken to him. He’s something inaccessible to you. He hangs out with the popular crowd. Yet, unlike all of them, he doesn’t seem to pretend. He doesn’t show up. He naturally exudes an aura that makes him alluring. He’s not just what could be called "hot." No, he’s beautiful. When you first saw him in the school hallways, you could swear that for a second, your heart stopped. He was playing with his lighter, walking with an assured stride in the direction of his classroom with Jason Carver. He was a palette of contrasting colors that stood out in perfect harmony. His tanned face was framed by long, golden curls that almost fell over his shoulders. He looked straight ahead as he listened to the boy at his side with his red mouth stretched into a smirk that revealed white teeth. His cupid bow was dusted with stubble. It was no surprise that most of the girls looked at him with no shame, the shyest ones glancing up as soon as he passed them. That California boy did not look like a boy. He looked like a man. You could tell by the way he was built, the black leather jacket hugging his broad shoulders, the muscular legs in his denim jeans.

You had realized that you were staring openly at him when he passed by you and, probably feeling the weight of your gaze on him, his eyes had met yours. There, something had happened inside you. His eyes were the purest blue you had ever seen. They were crystalline. But it was the long dark lashes that gave his gaze something expressive and unique. They were the embodiment of what is called a piercing gaze. It was a unique paradox: as angelic as it was rough in outline. Awakening from your enchantment, you lowered your gaze with an abrupt jerk of your head and resumed putting your books away in the locker, feeling your cheeks on fire and your heart beating wildly.

That was the only time you had even a remote semblance of contact with him.

As you rush to your English literature class a month later, rounding the corner of the hallway, the last thing you expect is to bump into him. You let out an "ouch" as you collide with his hard chest, your notes and pencil case tumbling to the ground in the chaos. It's only when you raise your eyes in a flurry of apologies that you realize who you've bumped into. You swallow, kneeling and picking up your notes hastily.

"You alright?"

"Yes. Yes." the notes slip through your shaking fingers.

His hands appear in your field of vision, and when you accidentally touch them, an electric shock almost makes you wince. He helps you pick them up, then raises to his feet and holds them to you. You thank him, thinking about what else you could say to avoid making the situation awkward. His baby blue shirt matches the color of his eyes. He’s even prettier from closer.

"Aren’t you in history class with me ?"

His question surprises you. You didn't think he would remember you. You didn't think he would notice you.

"Yes. That's right."

He holds out his hand, his heavy-lidded gaze on you. "Billy."

You shake his hand, introducing yourself. His hand is large and his grip his firm, but gentle at the same time. That touch makes your stomach tangle. You can't believe he is talking to you.

"You're new, right?" you ask. You know fully well that he arrived here a month ago. You know full well that he is from California. He probably knows that you know, but he doesn't say anything about it

"Yes. Moved here last month."

“Oh, okay. Welcome to Hawkins, then.” you say gently as you absently tuck a strand of hair behind your ear.

“Thanks.”

There’s a beat of silence, him probably waiting for you to say something else. You point at the door down the hallway, starting to walk away. “I ah, I have to go to class. Sorry.”

And you walk away, no, you scurry away, almost escaping him, feeling a pang of embarrassment as you replay the scene later in your head, regretting how abruptly you left without saying more.

You don’t cross paths with him again after that. However, you are clearly more aware of his presence during history classes even though you don’t interact again.

In recent months, you've adopted a strategy of minimizing your visibility as much as possible. It’s not always easy. That Thursday is one of the hard days. Mr. Jensen, the new history teacher, makes his way through the rows of desks, collecting permission slips signed by parents for the upcoming day trip he has organized to Indianapolis.

"Ah, I don't seem to have your permission slip yet," he inquires gently as he sees you empty-handed. "Did you forget to bring it today?"

Feeling the eyes of everyone on you, your cheeks flush with embarrassment as you shake your head, your voice barely above a whisper. You hate all of this attention on you. "I, um, I haven't been able to get it signed yet. My dad's been working double shifts, and I haven't caught him at home."

“I understand,” the teacher says, “But I need to give all the signed papers to the principal by tomorrow. Is it possibly to get it signed today? By your mother, perhaps?”

Before you could answer, Tommy Hagan's voice pierces the air, his tone laced with mockery. "She's probably halfway across the country by now, cozying up with some other guy."

You don’t even turn to look at him. You saw it coming. It’s been five months since she left now. Hawkins is a small town, so the news spread quickly. You shift uncomfortably in your seat, avoiding eye contact with your classmates as you feel the weight of their curious gazes.

"I uh...I just," you try to ignore Tommy's comment, resting your eyes on the professor whose eyebrows are furrowed in confusion. "I'll tell my dad tonight. He's just been really busy. I will bring it to class tomorrow."

“If he comes back with the milk.” snickers Tommy.

You stiffen instantly without wanting to, which the teacher doesn’t fail to notice.

“That's enough, Mr. Hagan. Comments like that have no place in my classroom.” he snaps as his eyes darken, his jaw set. His expression softens as he turns to me “Don't worry about the permission slip for now. We'll make sure you're included."

As the professor returns to his seat, your eyes remain fixed on the spot where the bench is chipped, absently touching it with your fingernail. Your body fails to relax as you fight to ignore the burning in your throat, careful not to blink, your vision blurred for a few moments. But Tommy's yelp draws your attention and you turn your head to your left, where he is sitting next to Billy.

“Ow. What was that for, man?”

Tommy is rubbing his shoulder, his face scrunched up in pain and a mixture of disbelief and confusion on his face. Billy stares straight ahead, his face cold and hard.

"What the fuck is your problem?" he eventually mutters under the teacher’s explanation. However, it sounds more like a statement than a question.

As you go back to stare at your desk, your throat is still burning but your vision is clear again. You wonder if what Billy said was because of Tommy's comments. Why would he defend you?

The rest of the class passes in a blur of confusion and unanswered questions. Tommy's hurtful words echo in your mind, leaving you shaken and upset, the sting of their cruelty lingering long after the bell rings.

***

On the morning of the school trip, you are tempted to call the school and say you are sick, but your father comes back from the plant later in the morning and will see that you are actually fine. Also, Mr. Jensen might suspect that something is going on. Only, the idea of spending the day with the whole class, but feeling more alone than you are when you're at school, doesn't appeal to you. You've never been very outgoing. Since your mother left, the armor that covered you has only thickened, alienating you from the rest of the world. To this day you have received no answers. She left overnight without warning. You never received a call. You knew that things had not been going well between your parents for some time. Or rather, your mother kept complaining about how being in Hawkins was suffocating her, how she was no longer happy. The pain was slowly becoming coated with resentment. She had abandoned you and your father as if nothing had happened, as if years of living together had counted for nothing. As if being a family had cost nothing. Arriving on the ground floor and finding the kitchen light off had now become a habit, not an odd occurrence. Other things had become routine: the unaccustomed silence in your house, the TV once perpetually on now always off, the teapot once always in use was now in the kitchen drawer.

Once on the school bus, you spend your time looking out the window and counting the trees on the distant hills. You can feel the wind blowing outside, the rain pelting cruelly on the window. A crack lets a trickle of air through, making you shiver and clench tighter in your jacket. The ride at least passes quietly, no one talking to you or bothering you. Tommy Hagan keeps his comments to himself, too busy jabbering in the back of the bus with his band of friends. You can hear the occasional shrillness in the voice of Carol Perkins, his girlfriend.

You spend almost the entire morning in the Indiana Historical Society, following the professor through the corridors of the museum. You stay in the background, drowning out the guide's voice and looking at the paintings hanging on the wall. As you change rooms, you realize that you are not the only one who has remained aloof. Billy Hargrove lingers to your side at the back of the row of students, his hands tucked into his leather jacket. You try not to be affected by his presence, suddenly self-conscious of the way you walk and breathe. You still remember what he told Tommy Hagan the week before. You are increasingly convinced that he defended you. As the class spreads in different directions, everyone observing something different and speaking lowly in small groups you realize he’s still here, on your side. As you ponder if you should say something, or just assume that he’s walking behind on his own, he catches you off guard.

“Kinda boring, huh?”

“Yeah, a little," you respond, offering him a small smile that probably looks like a grimace. "History isn't my cup of tea."

“Mine neither,” his gaze scans the display cases lining the wall on your left. “Beats being seated all day in class, though.”

“Definitely,” you nod in agreement as you slowly cross through another room. Desperately trying to fill the silence, you come up with the first thing that crosses your mind. “I’ve been here before.”

“The museum?”

“Indianapolis,” you say. You hesitate before finishing your thoughts. “My grandma lived here. I spent some weekends at hers.”

Billy hums. He sniffs, then retrieves some chewing gums from his back pocket. He unwraps one. “How’s the city?”

“It’s great. Oh, thank you.” you softly say as you take the gum he’s offering you. “There are some nice parks.”

He pops the chewing gum in his mouth. “We have quite a few in San Diego too.

You turn toward him, curiosity overcoming your shyness. “You lived in San Diego?”

“Yes. Big change of scenery.”

“I can imagine.” your gaze wanders to the antique objects displayed in a glass case. “I’ve seen pictures, it looks incredible.” memories of your dad's album, from when he was young, flood your mind – images of palm trees swaying in the breeze, golden beaches stretching for miles, and endless blue skies that seemed to merge seamlessly with the ocean.

“That’s something else, yeah. Honestly, I couldn’t complain at all.”

“I wish I could see California,” you say a little dreamily.

“I can take you one day.”

Your throat feels suddenly dry. So you let out a nervous giggle, avoiding his gaze, assuming he is joking. Fortunately, the professor calls your attention back. It's lunchtime and he tells you that you are free to go wherever you want, as long as you are outside the museum within four hours. You told your father the school would pay for the student's lunch because you know times are tough. He insisted on giving you ten dollars in case you need it.

You walk down the steps of the museum looking around and thinking about where you could make all this time go. It's going to be long. You know a few restaurants, but you know that your pocket money is clearly not enough to eat there. A gust of wind brings the smell of smoke to your nostrils, and out of the corner of your eye, you see Billy stop beside you. His eyes take in your surroundings.

“So, you told me you know the city.”

“Huh, yes,” you answer, a little lost. “Not all of it, but most of it, like downtown.”

Billy exhales the smoke he’s been holding in his mouth. “Are we downtown?”

You look around, recognizing the skyscrapers in the distance. "Yes," you point to the skyline to your right, figuring he simply wants to ask you for information so he knows where to go with his friends. "It's over there."

“Sweet. You hungry?”

The silence that passes between the two of you makes him turn toward you, waiting for your response. So you rush to answer, ignoring the way his piercing blue eyes make you feel self-conscious.

“Yes. Yes, a little bit,” then you ask him, unsure: “...are you?”

“Starving.” he resumes walking down the stairs again, and you follow him, trying to figure out if he really means what you think he means. Some classmates are already leaving in different directions. “You know someplace to eat?”

“I do. But I don’t have enough. In case you want to go together. If that’s what you were offering.” You add, mentally slapping yourself. Why does everything you say have to come across as weird? Besides, you just admitted that you are practically out of money. “I can show you, though.”

Billy shakes his head, shifting in his leather jacket. “Nah, don’t worry about it. It’s on me.”

“No, really, I can't let you do that," you insist, your voice tinged with concern. "I mean, I appreciate it, but I can't just let you pay for me."

Billy turns to you, a hint of amusement dancing in his eyes as he exhales the smoke sideways. "Come on, it's no big deal," he reassures you. "Consider it my way of saying thanks for showing me around. Besides, it's not like I'm short on cash."

You hesitate for a moment. But ultimately, you know that accepting his offer would ease the burden on your wallet. With a resigned sigh, you nod in agreement. "Okay, if you insist," you concede, offering him a small smile. "But just this once.”

You wanna immediately grimace at your pathetic implication that there would be another time, but Billy doesn’t seem to notice anyway.

He just winks at you. And even if he’s not smiling or anything, it still makes your stomach flip. "Deal," he says. "Now, lead the way."

As you walk beside each other through the park later on, you relish in what surrounds you, not even realizing the silence that has settled between the two of you because it feels so natural. Some people are jogging, there are some families too, or people walking alone headed who knows where. The birds are chirping in the trees that are alongside the walk. You spot a squirrel scurrying up the trunk of one of them, its fluffy tail waving wildly. The late afternoon sun is shining right in front of you, hitting your skin in a gentle caress. Spring is gradually unfurling its colors, bringing with it a glimmer of warmth that has been absent from your life lately. In the midst of the cold and desolation that settled in after your mother's departure, this glimpse of light offers a tentative promise of renewal, a small beacon of hope amid the darkness that has enveloped you and your father. You glance at Billy, realizing that in the short span of your conversation, he's frequently reached for a cigarette. Yet, even during the moments when he abstained, like in the museum and at the restaurant, his mouth was never empty. It was either occupied by a mint, a bite of burger, the straw of his milkshake, or eventually a toothpick found on the table.

“So, uhm, have you been somewhere else besides San Diego or Hawkins?” you venture.

“Nope”, he answers, the “p” resounding loudly. He looks around, one hand in his jacket pocket as the other one holds the cigarette on his side. “Never moved from Cali. I was born in Santa Barbara. Then moved to San Diego when I was ten.”

You hum in acknowledgment. “Is Santa Barbara close to the ocean?”

“It is. I’ve always lived by the ocean.”

You turn to him, enthusiasm laced in your voice as you get carried away in the conversation. “So you know how to surf?”

Billy chuckles, nodding as he brings the cigarette to his lips. “I do, yeah. Surfed every day.”

“Wow.” you breathe, your mind wandering away. “It must be…like an adrenaline rush.”

As Billy exhales the smoke, you don’t miss the nostalgic glint flickering in his eyes, but it’s gone as quickly as it came. "Yeah, it's something else. There's nothing quite like catching a wave, feeling the power of the ocean beneath you."

“I’ve heard it’s hard to learn.” you muse softly.

The rhythmic sound of your footsteps punctuates the conversation. Billy stays silent for a few seconds, probably lost in his thoughts. Then he shrugs. “To be honest, I was on the surfboard since I was a child, so must’ve been natural for me. But yeah, it generally is.

“I can only imagine," you respond, a sense of longing in your voice. You’ve only seen this kind of landscape in pictures or on TV. "Must have been amazing growing up with that kind of freedom."

Billy's sigh is loud as he exhales a plume of smoke, his gaze drifting towards the horizon. "It was. Surfing was my escape, you know? Whenever things got tough, I could just grab my board and disappear into the waves."

What he says lightens some curiosity in you. You wonder what he means by that. You wonder what he went through, what his past was like. There’s something really intriguing about him. But you refrain from asking more, aware of how little you know each other. Besides, you can’t help but notice the little twitch of his jaw muscles as he says it.

"It’s always been books for me.” you offer. “They have this way of transporting you to another world, making you forget about everything else."

Billy nods in understanding. “What kinda books you read?”

“Oh,” you look at your shoes as you feel suddenly vulnerable. You almost feel ashamed of your taste in books, but you know you shouldn’t. “A bit of everything, really. I’m reading a Dostoevsky one right now.

“Dostoevsky, huh? Pretty heavy stuff,” he says, arching an eyebrow.

“You’ve read some of him before?

“I read Dream of a Ridiculous Man. A long time ago though.”

“Oh,” you breathe, recalling how challenging it was to finish it when you read it a couple of months ago. Reading books by Dostoevsky, especially that one, has been both a cathartic and enlightening experience. They made you feel less alone in your pain. “Did you like it?”

“Yeah, it’s kinda controversial.” he grimaces. “It’s a fucking depressing book. But... it's like... there's something about it that just... resonates, you know what I mean? Like, you read it and... it's like looking into a mirror, but... the reflection's all twisted and weird. I don't know if that makes any sense.” he shrugs.

It couldn’t make more any sense to you. For the first time, you feel understood in that sense. It's a relief to know that you're not alone in finding meaning within its pages. His words resonate deeply with you.

“I totally get it. That’s part of the reason why I like his books.”

The subtle revelation hangs in the air with the rhythmic sound of your footsteps on the concrete path. You hope he’s not reflecting on your words too much, aware of what you’ve implied. Your own thoughts go on what he said. Why did Billy resonate so much with the book? What if there’s something everybody can relate to, even people who haven’t experienced anything bad in life?

“What about you?” he then asks. “Always been in Hawkins?”

“Born and raised.” you nod. Then you add, a bit sheepishly: “Nothing like California, unfortunately.”

Billy snorts, flicking his cigarette. “What’s there to do in summer?”

“Oh uh. Nothing much. We have a public pool.” you offer, looking at him.

Billy takes a drag, his eyes trailing on the path in front of both of you.

“We have Lover’s Lake too,” you add. “It’s quite nice, actually. People spend the day there and have barbecues or campfires.”

“Yeah, I’ve heard about that one,” he says. “You guys party by the lake during summer or something like that.”

“Yes.” then you keep quiet for a few breaths, imagining he’s probably heard it from one of his friends from the basketball team. They’re usually to host parties or organize them. It always involves loads of alcohol and ends up in big scandals. You feel the urge to correct him. “Not me, though. I don’t, uh…I don’t party.”

You feel his eyes on you. “Makes sense.”

You look up at him in question.

“Didn’t see you at the Halloween party.”

“The one hosted by Tina Williams?” you soon look away as soon as you meet his gaze. “I didn’t know you…you noticed.”

“Would’ve sure as hell noticed if you were there.”

As Billy's words settle in, you feel a warmth spreading through you, starting from the tips of your ears and flushing your cheeks crimson. His simple compliment catches you off guard, igniting a whirlwind of emotions within you. You find yourself struggling to meet his gaze, your eyes flickering away as you search for some semblance of composure. None of this makes sense. The mere fact that he recognized your absence at the party, that he shared lunch with you, that he's now walking beside you in the park—it all feels inexplicable. You're accustomed to blending into the background, being an outcast in the bustling halls of the school. You're no stranger to the whispers that swirl around you, painting you as the outsider, the comments about your situation at home, the subtle jabs at your circumstances. The silence between you stretches, pregnant with unspoken thoughts.

“You’re alright?” you hear him ask.

You slow down, lingering to a stop as you realize Billy has stopped walking too. He looks down at you with a hint of curiosity, the sun caressing his golden skin and reflecting in his eyes, becoming like polished, crystalline gems. That’s when you notice little details you haven’t paid attention to before. The scar cutting through his right eyebrow, the pattern of freckles dusting his nose.

“I guess I’m just a little confused,” you admit.

Billy exhales the smoke from his nostrils, his gaze effortlessly fixed intensely on you. “Why is that?”

“I just…” you try to not avoid his gaze. “Why are you here with me?”

The corners of his eyes crinkle in amusement and what looks like genuine confusion. “Why wouldn’t I?”

His question is so simple it takes you off guard. Makes you question your reasoning. As you’re at a loss for words, you feel a blush slowly creeping down your cheeks.

Billy’s lips slowly curve into a smile, somewhat teasing. “You really have pretty eyes, you know that?”

You’re positively sure you’re as red as a lobster now, a little whine escaping your lips as embarrassment settles over you. It’s the most instinctual reaction. It makes him chuckle, and makes you awkwardly laugh in response, because what else can you do? He tilts his head to the side, trying to meet your avoiding eyes.

“How about that? I’m here with you ‘cause of your pretty eyes”.

“I really don’t think they’re that special.” you shake your head, still laughing.

You’re not that innocent to not realise he’s openly flirting with you. You’re not surprised, because just looking at him is enough. You’ve also heard things about him and some girls at high school. What surprises you, is that he’s flirting with you. You don’t have that much experience in the love department, but there’s something sincere and genuine in the way he’s doing it now. There’s something soft in his eyes that tells you he’s sincere.

“Well, it’s a shame,” he says, that’s when you realise how much closer you are to each other. You can tell by how you can smell the tobacco and his cologne, his silver earring shining as it catches the sun. He tilts his head again, this time catching your gaze as you muster the courage to lock eyes with him. “’Cause you have beautiful eyes.”

“Thank you,” you mumble with a shy smile, nodding your head slightly. You swear you can hear your heartbeat in your ears.

You feel like you want to return the compliment because his eyes are the reason why your heart is reacting the way it does. But then again, you’re too shy to do that, and a tiny part of you thinks it would make things weird or would end up having you vulnerable because you don’t know for sure if his compliment is fueled by real interest in you.

“I just don’t hang out with anyone, trust me.”

As a distant church bells toll four times, their echoes drifting across the park, a subtle reminder of the passing time washes over you both. The realization settles in that it’s time for you to go. You should be back in front of the museum in half an hour.

Luckily, Billy saves you from answering as he breaks eye contact and looks up beyond your shoulder, where the church is. “We should go,” he says.

As you walk back to the museum, you think about his words. Now you realize that you didn’t see him hanging around Tommy Hagan lately. In particular, today on the bus, the latter was seated with his girlfriend and hung out with two other members of the basketball team. Billy was somewhere else the whole time.

When you two reach the museum, the teacher is already counting everyone to make sure the whole class is there. Billy joins his mates, elbowing one of them in a friendly gesture. You didn’t fail the notice the looks most of your classmates shot at you when he saw you two arrive together. The teacher draws the class's attention back to the trip, prompting feedback and reflections from everyone.

What you don’t expect either once on the bus, is feeling someone sitting on the empty seat next to yours. Billy gets comfortable, making it seem something so normal as he stretches his long legs as far as the cramped quarters allow. His thigh brushes against yours and your heart jumps a little in your ribcage, but a few minutes later you start to relax. You can’t help the feeling of warmth spreading through your chest as you take in his choice to sit deliberately next to you. You don’t need to fill the silence, or at least not as strongly as a few hours ago. You’re also quite tired. As you venture a glance in his direction, Billy’s eyes are closed. It seems you’re not the only one feeling tired. His arms are crossed over his chest but his facial features are totally relaxed now that he’s dozing off, his head resting against the seat. His hair seems soft at the touch, a curl falling unruly on his forehead. You feel the distant urge to wrap it around your finger, brush it from his face. There is a difference between now and when he’s fully awake: his expression softened, his gaze peaceful, and his features relaxed. It's a stark contrast from the demeanor you've observed from a distance, where his smile is more wolfish, his facial muscles tense, and his eyes often distant or bored. You force yourself to look away from him, setting your gaze on the window. As the rhythmic hum of the bus lulls you into a state of drowsiness, you feel your eyelids grow heavy. The warmth of the moment envelops you, and soon, you find yourself dozing off as well.

Once you get off the bus, you wrap your arms around your waist as you shiver. The weather is distinctly different. It seems to have been raining all day. The sky is darkening. School buses cannot take you home because there is no bus stop near your house. Forest Hill Trailer Park is in the isolated part of Hawkins. There is no one from the high school living there, so you can't ask anyone for a ride. It's not like anyone would have offered anyway. You've always walked to and from school, in total it takes you forty minutes. As you start to walk away from the bus, you hear footsteps behind you and Billy is at your side, effortlessly catching up with you. You realize his car is parked a few steps away from you. The gleaming navy blue Camaro stands out among the other cars, "CALIFORNIA" on the license plate.

You take the opportunity to thank him before he can dart away and you will probably never exchange another word again.

“Hey,” you start, turning to look at him. “I just wanted to thank you for paying at lunch today.”

Billy plays with the lighter, making it bounce in his hand. “It’s nothing. How are you getting home?”

“Oh, I’m walking.” you point your thumb at the road on your left.

“Come on. I’ll drive you.”

Your mouth opens and closes stupidly, then your brain finally decides to cooperate. Accepting his offer feels like taking advantage of his kindness. You don't want to do this. “I…it’s not a long walk, don’t worry about it.”

“It’s probably gonna rain soon.” he points at the sky, walking past you and toward the parked car.

“You don’t have to.” you insist, guilt filling my stomach as he opens the passenger door for you.

“I know.” he chuckles.

The soft thrumming of a rock song fills the air, the bass pulsing gently as Billy lowers the volume as soon as he turns the engine on. The interior of the Camaro envelops you in a world that feels distinctly his. The smell of leather fills your senses, mingling with the faint scent of his cologne. It's clear that he takes immense pride in his car and the care and attention he devotes to it reflects on the interior. The leather seats feel soft and smooth. There's not a speck of dust anywhere, even in the corners. A pair of aviators rests on the dashboard.

You give him directions, your voice cutting through the quiet ambiance of the car. He nods in acknowledgment, his gaze focused on the road ahead. His left arm casually drapes against the window, while his other hand firmly grasps the top of the steering wheel.

“It’s quite a walk,” he observes as the Camaro speeds through the road surrounded by the woods.

“Yeah…”

You’re thinking of asking him to stop before getting to Forest Hill, but it’s pouring and you don’t have an umbrella. As you get closer and closer, anxiety starts rippling through you. You shake the feeling out of your head. You’re being ridiculous, there’s nothing to be ashamed about. Additionally, you barely know him. You try and distract yourself, asking him about where he lives instead.

“Cherry Lane. You know where it is?”

“Yes, it’s a nice and quiet area. It’s not that far from school either,” you observe.

Billy absently scratches his chin, the glint of a silver braided ring catching your eye. “Yeah. It’s quiet, that’s for sure.”

You find yourself wondering about its significance. Does it have one? You've heard numerous accounts of Billy's involvement in fights at parties, tales of the severe injuries sustained by those who crossed him, and the ferocity of his punches. How many times has that ring been tainted with someone else's blood? Despite the rumors surrounding his aggressive behavior, your interactions with Billy have always been positive. He's consistently shown kindness to you.

Billy turns left, veering off the main road onto a narrow side road, the tires crunching on the gravelly dirt path that winds its way towards Forest Hills. The rain drums insistently against the car, a steady rhythm punctuating the silence between you.

The first trailer emerges into view, its weather-beaten exterior casting a shadow of foreboding over your already uneasy mind. Despite your discomfort, you muster the courage to speak up, directing Billy to continue driving until the end of the road.

You steal a furtive glance at him, searching for any hint of judgment in his expression, but Billy remains impassive. There's no trace of surprise or disdain in his features. His gaze lingers on the scene before you, studying it with a detached curiosity that seems to characterize his view of Hawkins as a whole.

“Thanks again for today, really. I wanna pay you back,” you venture as he slows down.

Billy waves a dismissive hand before settling it on the gear shift, smoothly transitioning into first gear. “I told you it’s no big deal. Wouldn’t have offered otherwise.”

You worry at your lip, still not totally convinced. You glance at him. “I know that. But it doesn’t sound fair. It’s important to me.”

Billy's gaze shifts to the road ahead as he seemingly considers your words. "If you really wanna make it up to me," he starts, his voice trailing off for a moment before he continues, "How about you show me around Hawkins sometime?"

You blink, caught off guard by his suggestion. "Show you around Hawkins?"

"Yeah," he nods, resting his forearm loosely on the steering wheel as he gestures while he talks. "I've only been here a short while, and I don't really know my way around outside downtown yet. Like, all the places you talked to me about. The lake, the quarry."

The idea appeals to you, though the thought of spending more time with him outside of school never crossed your mind. The fact of spending time with him in the first place was out off the charts for you. "Sure, I could do that," you reply, a tentative smile tugging at the corners of your lips. "I mean, I'm not exactly a tour guide, but I could show you some cool spots. Whenever you want, uhm. Yeah.”

Billy reaches out to the compartment on the passenger side, brushing your knee with his arm. He opens it and extracts a pen.

“Here,” he takes off the cap with his teeth, and before you know it he’s taking your arm, gently lifting your sweater sleeve.

You try to look unfazed by his touch, though the feeling of his fingertips pressing gently against your skin as he holds your forearm, the sensation of the pen as he writes something on it makes you shiver, raising goosebumps. You look at him in silent confusion as he writes, his dark lashes brushing his cheekbones, a glimpse of pearly white teeth and a sharp canine as he holds the cap between them. Then he releases your arm, and you take a look at it while he takes the cap from his mouth. A series of numbers are written in blue ink on your skin. A phone number.

“Oh.” you say softly. You definitely haven’t expected that.

“Call me when you feel like it.”

It’s really hard for you to hide your nervousness, acting as cool as you can.

“Okay, will do.” you unbuckle your belt, glancing at him enough to give him a soft smile.

Billy nods at you in silent farewell before you close the passenger door. “Have a good night”.

“You too. Bye.”

The warmth of Billy's presence lingers in the car as you step out into the cool, damp air, the raindrops falling softly around you. Closing the door behind you, you watch as the sleek navy blue Camaro disappears down the little road and into the woods from the small window of the living room. As you stand there, the drops of water falling from the end of your hair, you can't help but brush at the phone number on your forearm, tracing the neat handwriting with your fingertips. It's like you're still trying to wrap your head around what just happened. Though you're trying to keep it under control, you can't help the fluttering feeling in your heart.

#billy hargove imagine #billy hargove smut #billy hargrove #dacre montgomery #billy hargove x reader #stranger things fic #billy hargrove x oc #billy hargrove fic #billy hargrove fluff #billy hargrove x reader #billy hargrove angst #billy hargrove imagine #dacryphilia #eddie munson #billy hargrove x y/n #billy stranger things #billy hargrove x you #stranger things smut

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instant-delusions · 10 months

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ˑ༄ؘ ۪۪۫۫ ▹"Limitless"◃ ۪۪۫۫ ༄ؘ ˑ

wind pillar || shinazugawa sanemi × f! reader

cw! : typical sanemi behavior , smut : degradation, unprotected sex

a/n : people are calling characters 'lana del rey' coded, 'melanie martinez' coded - sanemi's fucking pink guy coded.

✧༺ 　　༻∞

'fuck this job' , you think while scrubbing away blood that has been splattered on the wind hashira's estate during yet another brutal training session. a kakushi, such as yourself, is hardly getting paid enough to do this.

'at least sanemi's not here' . obviously, his scary demeanor is well known throughout the demon slayer corps and the stress of being yelled at is something you'll gladly do without, even if the person yelling is as hot as he is. well, it's no secret - the open uniform showing his abs, the dominating aura, his voice, even the scars on his body are more than enough to have you daydreaming filthy things while he mercilessly attacks lower ranks.

you throw the now bloody rag into a basket with other cleaning utensils and make your way inside, looking for the room you got the tools from. the estate was huge, showing you once again that the checks both of you get are miles apart. sliding shoji after shoji open, you thank god once again for sanemi not being home. after around five minutes you decide to just put it somewhere and head home, dreamily thinking of the sake on your nightstand.

"fucking slacking off?" you squeal in shock as a nightmare became true. sanemi's leaning against one of the walls with a raised eyebrow - crazy, you didn't even hear his steps. "of course not, sir! I'm just unsure - where do you want me to put these?". thank god your voice didn't betray you, usually you would've shat yourself by now. the wind pillar glances at the utensils in your hand and looks right back at you, he's definitely mad, completely having read through your laziness. "I fucking hate people like you. you're working for me, know your place." quickly, he stepped towards you, ripping the basket from your hands and throwing it across the room.

'fuck, he's obviously had a bad day.' you flinched as the basket made contact with the wooden floor, hands shaking with anxiety. 'he won't hurt me, right?' . he stared down at you furiously, clicking his tongue - "won't even talk, huh? are you that much of a bitch?". lord, his words sting but you're way too tired for this, it's been fifteen hours. "sorry. I didn't think it mattered, really. won't happen again." you answered, realizing that your tone must've sounded way too half-assed. you started to bow, but the next second your were pressed against the floor with his hand around your neck, realizing what just happened you tried to squirm out of his hold.

"you're such a fucking brat, can't even do the simplest job." he leaned down, his breath fanning against your ear. "I think it's time someone put you in your place." sanemi whispered. his voice is raspy, low and it sends shocks down your body, straight to your pussy. fuck, you're scared but also in the process of being absolutely turned on - in a pathetic attempt to struggle, you kick your legs, though he immediately presses his body down to trap you, sliding a leg between yours. dangerously close to your core.

the hashira licks a stripe from your ear down to where your uniform begins, and starts undoing the buttons of your top. "w-wait!" you choke out with a beet-red face, uselessy grabbing at the fabric of his clothes. "shut the fuck up. my day's been shit, i need me some pussy to calm down. you can do at least one job right, bitch." he speaks harshly, but the words light a fire in you, the way he talks to you, it's way too hot . the last button of your top comes undone and sanemi throws it away carelessly, pressing two fingers against your clothed cunt and lapping at your boobs immediately. you moan out loud and grind your body against his - damn, you've heard he's hot-headed, but diving straight in like this? you waste no time in undoing his belt, and pushing his pants down. sanemi sits back on his knees and pulls his boxers and pants down enough to free his massive cock.

"how's that gonna fit?" you ask him unsure, in response he laughs out and pushes your skirt down. with his fingers he pulls your panties to the side and inserts one, moving his thumb in circular motions against your clit. "imma make it fit." he answers, your loud moans almost drowning out his voice. the wet noises of your pussy echo in the room as he begins to scissor into you. "fuck, your pussy's drooling over my fingers, straight onto the floor. aren't you embarrassed, you whore?" he punctures his words with another finger and you arch your back of the floor, mewling and whimpering at his brutal pace. " 'm coming, shinazugawa-san!" you shout, teary-eyed, but the hashira immediately redacts his fingers, holding them to his mouth and licking them clean - what a lewd sight. you huff in a disappointed manner, which makes the pillar smile for a split second. cute. "sanemi." he corrects - "you're gonna cum on my cock."

you look down to his dick and see it pulsing, veiny, girthy and long. a drop of pre cum sliding down its side. "like what you see?" he smirks, obviously, he caught you staring. you nod shyly and he slaps your cheek. "use your words, slut." looking up into his eyes, you lick your lips and say; "...want your cock, sanemi." that definitely made something snap in him. a fat drop of spit landed on his dick, which he smeared all over. with a strong grip on his cock, he slid it through your folds slowly, the head nudging your clit, until he finally decided to push in.

both of you moaned at the tight fit - "fuck, you got a virgin pussy, (y/n)." the way his cock stretched you into oblivion didn't make the use of your name go unnoticed. "you..." a loud moan erupted from your throat - "know my name?". sanemi pushed against your cervix, filling you to the absolute brim. "of course, stupid." he rasped, letting you adjust to his size. after a while, you wiggled your hips slightly, signaling him to move, which he definitely didn't need to hear twice. sanemi pulled his cock out almost all the way and pushed it back in, which made you scream so loudly, he caught your lips in a messy kiss. "what the fuck, you want muzan to hear us?" he spat, picking up his speed. his balls lewdly clapped against your asscheeks and the sound filled the room. you could feel a string of your wetness connect them and threw your legs around his waist, bringing him closer. "fuck...pretty girl can't get enough of me, huh? cock drunk already?". you trashed around, a drooling, moaning mess and sanemi swears it's one of the hottest views he's ever seen. connecting your lips once again, he goes even faster, surely bruising the back of your thighs. "sanemi...oh my god, cumming! cumming!" you threw your head back, spasming around him, trying to milk his cock. he moans loudly at the tightness.

with a few more thrusts, he spills deep inside you, painting your walls white with his thick cum. sanemi pulls out with a sinful squelch and fingers the sperm that's threatening to spill out inside of you. like the gentleman he is, the man cleans you up and carries you to his futon. at this point, your shift has been 16 hours long and you can't wait to snuggle and sleep.

#kny x reader #kny smut #kny #kny sanemi #sanemi shinazugawa #demon slayer #demon slayer smut #sanemi #sanemi x reader #sanemi shinazugawa x reader #kimetsu no yaiba #kny oneshots #sanemi smut #reqs open

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luvlyhyunjin · 28 days

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Carousel┃H.HJ SMAU

Forty-Two - You're My Biggest Wish.

warnings: pure smut, degrading names, dirty talk etc

wc: 6.4k

playlist: keep on loving you - cas / affection - between friends / lana del rey - cinnamon girl

༶•┈┈୨♡୧┈┈•༶༶•┈┈୨♡୧┈┈•༶༶•┈┈୨♡୧┈┈•༶

“Is this everything?” you ask, your voice reverberates through your living room that is now filled with brown closed boxes. Your hands are on your hips, turning to face Hyunjin who has made himself comfortable. Leaning against your doorframe as if he always belonged there. He looks good in your apartment; you note to yourself.

He hums back, an answer that you take as a yes if the soft smile that adorns his pretty face anything to go. His blonde hair is pushed back, revealing the burden of prior days in his features. Your own eyes soften at him, your heartstrings tug towards him. Begs you to take care of your soul. You ignore it. Just for a fleeting respite, you know when this storm of emotions passes by, you’ll end up in his arms anyways. You wonder when did this sly cocoon of a game even started, a push and pull between you and yourself, trying to resist him only to end up on your knees for him.

“What?” Hyunjin asks with a tilting smile when your stare lingers, his voice echoes against the walls of your heart, pulling beats out of it just for him with ease. A subtle fragrance of something akin to love floats in the air surrounding you, waving itself into the playful raise of his brows, it has you running away from it, an endless yearn to flee from his gaze as you shake your head.

“Nothing.”

Warmth cradles you in Hyunjin’s hands when he reaches for you, a longing that seems to be lastingly cemented on the palm of his hand when he touches yours. You look at him in question.

“Thank you for letting me and Hannie stay.” His voice is small, in complete contrast to the way he towers over you.

“You already thanked me like ten times Jinnie.”

“I feel like it’s not enough.”

“It is more than enough. If there’s anything else, I could do for you then please tell me.” The familiar softness of your voice pulls you to his heart, you sit in the middle and spread your angelic wings and take all the space. Have his heart tighten around you and nothing else. He finds himself in a rare state of being at a loss of words. So instead, he leans down, and his lips graze the skin of your cheek placing a kiss there.

“Thank you, baby.” He whispers right into your cheek, knits his promise.

When he pulls back, your eyes are wide with loving sparkles and your cheeks pinked in his golden effect. It has him smiling, only at you who manages to stroke his ego beautifully each time.

Oh, how do you manage to bloom into the prettiest flower just under his gaze.

Your momentary bliss is interrupted by the steps of Hanuel running towards you with an excited bounce, he scurries through the maze of boxes and a thrilled beam stretches into his face, he looks so much like Hyunjin when he smiles, resembles the sun in an alike way and your heart tightens at the sight. You barely could handle one. Let alone have another copy of him.

“Noona!” he exclaims in calling for you, bringing attention to the box of the console you forgot to hide in between his short arms, he hugs it to his chest as if it was as precious as he looks.

“Can I play with this please? I’ve wanted a ps5 for a while.” He jumps up and down, glee echoing in his voice that has you smiling along. You open your mouth to reply, your words hold onto the tip of your tongue when Hyunjin talks milliseconds before you.

“Hannie you can’t just go around and snoop through people’s places.” He scolds.

“But Hyung,” Hanuel pouts, pure and childish in the way his brows knit together in disappointment.

“it’s okay Hannie,” you kneel in front of the smaller kid, a reassuring hand ruffles his black strands.

“I actually bought it for you so yes you can play with it whenever you want.” Hanuel eyes widen, an even bigger smile takes place on his face and his excitement has you giggling at the happiness dripping from his innocence.

“Hyung! Noona said it’s mine.” He boosts, turning to Hyunjin with giddiness evident in the way he won’t stop jumping and then in a swift moment he has his arms around you, throwing his small body into your embrace.

“Thank you so much Noona!” he says sweetly, and you’re taken back, eyes wide in shock and hands frozen awkwardly mid-air. have not expected that yet still manage to pat his back in time before he’s hurrying out the room to turn on his new ps5.

“What was that?” Hyunjin asks with narrowed eyes, displeasure all over his face and you only smile bashfully at him.

“A gift?” you reply with a tilt of your head, he shouldn’t find it that endearing.

“I can’t accept that we’re giving it back.”

“Please don’t. Hannie has been through a lot he deserves it.” You sway on your feet, a trying task to win his affection and approval for your impulsive acts “Besides, Felix told me that the only reason you started working was so you could buy it for him. And now with everything that’s going on with your mom you can’t pay the hospital bills and buy him that.” You continue before he interjects again.

“Y/N…” Hyunjin sighs, shoulders slumped, and his eyes betray an unsubdued vanquish. He always hated being at the weaker end of things. Grew up with a pride as big as him and you soften at him. Closing the small distance between you when your warm palms envelope his cheeks in increasing comfort.

“I wanted to do it, so I did it, you don’t have to repay me. Just take it okay?” your tone is sweet, hanging over his head like a cloud of alleviation.

“it’s too much,” he replies, shaking his head stubbornly and you huff.

“You don’t see me repaying you when you take care of me.”

“That’s different.” He counteracts with another shake of his head.

“Why? Just because I used money doesn’t make it any different. It’s just my own way of taking care of you.” Hyunjin keeps quiet for a moment, contemplating your words with clear hesitation clinging to his eyes as they look into yours. You jut out your bottom lip in a pout, batting your lashes at him in attempts to end this discussion and Hyunjin is immediately weakened, rolls his eyes just so he won’t have himself melting at your feet.

“Fine.” He grumbles and you smile.

Your tired body stumbles in the dark living room in search of the kitchen and hopefully a glass of water to quench your thirst, almost tripping over a box on your way you barely make it alive or at least that’s what it feels like when you see Hyunjin standing there. Grey sweatpants hanging low on his hips and his upper body bare, he’s shirtless. His necklace nestles perfectly against his pale skin, catches light from the moon stealing the flickers of shine all to himself. He looks ethereal and suddenly the sleep clinging to your lashes is gone in a blink.

He pauses amid drinking his glass of water, looking your way with tired eyes, dark circles adorning the under of his eyes, his hair is a mess atop his head, falling in unkempt blonde strands over his face. Yet the sight still manages to send your heart into the deep end. The air feels heavy in your lungs when you try to breathe it in.

“Hey,” he speaks first, voice softer than your dimly lit kitchen. And as he glances at you, his gaze seems to cut through the air with an almost tangible sharpness through the clearness of the glass between his fingers, appreciative and enticing as they trail over your figure. It burns you and his tiredness abandons his body at the vision of you in your white lace night dress.

“Hi,” you clear your throat hoping to dissipate the tension that’s melting on your skin, you felt it start to bubble up from the heat instead. “Can’t sleep?” he asks when you dawdle past him and head for the fridge, your powdery scent lingers in the air and he closes his eyes for a moment, sucking a deep breath in, feels it swirl around and hug his body in a warm embrace of you.

“Yeah,” you take one of the bottled waters, uncapping the lid to take a sip. The cold liquid fills you up with satisfaction. A trickle of water drips down the side of your mouth and Hyunjin watches it, eyes growing hooded. His eyes flicked to your plush, pink lips then scanned their way back into your wide, gleaming eyes. He licks his own, and brings your attention to them, you feel them calling for you. Your hand tightens around the water bottle.

“Why are you awake? I thought you went to sleep hours ago?” your voice is soft, leaning your shoulders on the fridge behind you, its coldness makes you shiver. Hyunjin only shrugs in silence, with clear intentions not to chat with you, he places his empty glass on the kitchen island and makes his way to you as if a magnetic pull is drawing him in.

“Were you thinking of me baby? Is that why you can’t sleep?” you blink at him, surprise overtaking your features at his sudden smugness that he wears in the smirk on his lips, he consumes your form with a dark assessment. A chill run across your spine, leaving you unsure if it’s the proximity of Hyunjin’s naked body or the cold of the fridge.

“Maybe.” Your voice no more above a hushed whisper, he looms over you, gaze turning serious, and a glint lingers there, dressing itself as raw attractiveness, he’s enraptured by your beauty.

His knuckles brush over your cheeks and satisfaction takes him when your dark lashes flutter, leaning into his touch and flapping your wings across the honeyed swipes of his affection. With a cup to your jaw, he’s asserting his dominance over you leaving you with no choice but to sway frailly under him.

“Can I kiss you?” he whispers, voice hoarse. you almost think you imagined it. You think your inner desires are speaking to you, whispering your wishes back to you, your wishes that you had ever since you were seventeen. But the brush of his nose against yours tells you otherwise.

“Yes.” You whisper back, right into the growing garden of love between you two. Your voice waters every blooming rose and Hyunjin finds himself melting once again, in the folds of your existence. His eyes dart all over your face as if he also can’t believe the word that came out of his mouth. As if you ever had a choice. He brushes his lips against yours and it has a shiver running down your spine. Arching your exposed back from the coldness of the fridge and into him. His hands are on your jaw, caressing it softly and then his pillowy tinted lips are on your softer ones.

It's dizzying, your head is spinning, and your senses are overwhelmed by the sweet taste of his. Your inclination takes over, pushes you to wrap your arms around his neck to pull him closer to you. Closer, closer, closer... you need to become one with him. The press of your breasts into him has him groaning against your plush lips. In response his tongue glides across your bottom lip begging for something deeper, for you to take him deeper. You open your mouth with a gasp, your hands are in the soft strands of his, tangling your fingers in them and spreading your delicate love in his roots. His tongue licks into your mouth, enlisting soft whines from your pink lips, his hands find solace on your waist while your tongue fights to keep up with the rhythm of his.

He pulls back with a gasp, desperate for air he wishes he didn’t need, lips plump and eyes darkening. You chase after him, your longing has you on your knees and you’re a slave to your ever-growing love. Pressing pleading chaste kisses to his lips, he breaths out a chuckle against you, you could hear your heartbeat in your ears, your body growing hot when he dives back into you with a newfound fervor. You tilt your head, and his hands travel down leaving a scrooching fire behind, sets your body alight with vigorous lust.

The intensity of the heat and passion of your shared kiss rendered you weak, has your legs shaking. When his hands reach the back of your thigh, his short nails digging into the plump flesh of them you can’t fight back against your need for him anymore, they betray you just like they’re not your own emotions and instead submitting to Hyunjin, transforming themselves into a sweet moan that tumbles out of your lips and into his. Swallowed by him and right into the lap of the monster he’s been trying so hard to keep at bay. Something snaps in him, his kisses quickly turning bruising, like the broken dreams you both built in your imagination when you were teenagers.

You’re unable to stand anymore, growing weaker and Hyunjin notices, tapping the back of your thighs, you jump, and he catches you like he always does, your legs wrapping around his waist, and he walks you to the closest counter, placing you atop of it and rests his forehead against yours. In attempts to regain his sanity back, the same one you seem to steal ever since he first saw you. You keep yours open, like a wanderer who finally found their home, they flit over his features, counting his lashes and your thumb brushes over his mole in softness that only you are capable of providing.

“I’ve been wanting to do that for the longest time.” He speaks first, standing between your legs and hands on the silky skin of your thighs. His hands are everywhere but nowhere close enough. You make it obvious by the way your ankle nudges his back, urging him forward and he comes so easily. Wonders how it is so easy for you to crawl into his skin, the sight of you. Hair tousled and swollen lips are enough to have his cock thickening up in the space of his boxers. He holds himself back, tugs on the leash of his desires and sits still. Dares his thumb that is brushing the inner of your thigh to not inch upwards.

“Me too,” you smile like you didn’t just have him by his heart, your eyes are like a dangerous weapon you aim carelessly at him, his own expression softens. Melting into unyielding affection for you.

“You’re so pretty.” He says it like it’s a spoken fact that you should have memorized by now, doesn’t understand the way your cheeks color in splashes of light pink and the way the intense emotions in your eyes have dwindled into the look of a broken girl you tried so hard to protect. It hits you out of nowhere, the void that has managed to suck the life out of everything in you is there again. You didn’t know someone could look at you with so much love and not reproach.

“Remember when we talked a while back about being scared of...” you speak after a moment, threading your fingers with his as if you were teenagers again and you reached for him for the first time. Feels electricity spreads through his limbs at your touch. warm and loving as you wave your other hand around in futile tries to describe whatever you guys have “...us?” you finally settle with, Hyunjin’s playful smile is teasing at you and you shove at his chest, ignoring the feel of his bare skin on your palm.

“I remember baby, what about it?” you pretend his endearment doesn’t affect you, like your heart isn’t dissolving at soft brush of his thumb. You pretend like his touch is not sending waves of arousal to your underwear.

“You never told me what you’re scared of.”

“I think I’m most scared of you leaving.” There are contradicting emotions in his inky eyes, vulnerability dressed in pain you caused, and you almost see it, the flashes of your past in his gaze, the day you left is fresh in there.

“Why do you think I’m gonna leave?” you ask with a squeeze to his warm hand, you feel a pang in your chest right where your heart is when he looks down, avoiding your eyes like it’s painful to look at you.

“I know I’m not good with these things,” your free hand cradles his jaw, softly as you smile at him encouragingly, reminding him you both are different, that despite the similarity that encompasses you, the striking differences are still here.

“I know the first time we failed I’ve treated you poorly. I was bad at showing you how much I loved you. I made you feel alone.” He confesses endlessly like all his sins are the only reason you ended up falling apart. As if you weren’t an accomplice in this crime, as if you didn’t stand on the grave of your love and looked down at it with an oldening stare. The truth stays logged in your throat, your eyes never leave his, a smile on your face and a pool of emotions rose-colored shimmer in the flickers of color in your eyes.

“I’m just scared of the past repeating itself. Of making the same mistakes.” You don’t have the heart to tell him that you know how this story ends. You don’t tell him about how you know time unravels, rewinds only to place the same fractures on your hearts. Were you selfish or too broken for the glimmering light they call hope? You’re not sure.

However, when Hyunjin leans into the warm embrace of your palm, turns his head to place a tender kiss there nestling another whisper of love that will only haunt you when he turns his back to you one day, you think it’s both.

“You won’t make the same mistakes Jinnie, I see you trying.” you smile in hope of reflecting the same tenderness.

“What if I’m not trying hard enough?” He questions, tone frail and laced in a rare display of insecurity that has you aching.

“You don’t need to try harder than you already are. Just you, is more than enough for me.”

But I’m not enough.

I’m not worth it.

Are the words you swallow down, lodging them in an endless poetry of broken promises and salty tears that you’re sure you’ll read to him someday just not tonight.

“I need to try harder because there’s no one else for me,” he confesses to you, eyes melting into yours in delicacy that wraps around your heart, calling for you and you respond right back by a brush of your thumb on his cheek. He closes his eyes momentarily as if he’s savoring your touch, drinks up all the love you’re dripping and asks for more. When he opens them again, they’re a shimmering pool of everything he had ever felt for you, it seeps into your being.

“you’re my biggest wish Y/N.” you feel it taking over you, the need to run and hide. The need to run away from him. An overwhelming fear attacks you at the fact that you know there’s no one else for you as well. Destiny is cruel, linking you to him, drawing him onto your body, soul, perfectly so no one else can keep up, the emptiness you feel won’t ever be filled by anyone other than Hwang Hyunjin. Perhaps that’s why you were speechless, running away from all the words you wanna say like a coward and instead you entwine his necklace between your fingers, tugging him towards you and into a soft kiss that you hope is enough to convey your feelings.

He kisses back just as tenderly, drowning you in affection, it has you choking on him. Your lips melt into one another, desperate to find new ways to connect, new ways bring back what once has died.

“Take me, Hyunjin.” You mumble against his lips, your breath mingling together. He moves to back away and your grip on the back of his neck tighten. Holding him in place, feeling like you might fall apart if he’s not next you if he’s not all over you.

He shakes his head at you in dismiss, faux denial that almost makes you want to whine.

“I can’t. I want to do this the right way” he’s breathing heavily. An evidence of his overflowing want for you and maybe that’s why his rejection doesn’t hurt you but fuels you to push him further into the abyss but you’ll be there to catch him “I’m already yours so why should we wait?” you repeat his own words to him, it has his eyes darkening so obviously drowning in lust and feeding off the tension building around you two.

Your hand reaches for his, circling his thin wrist and guiding him to where you need him most. He watches with growing anticipation as you trail his hand down your body and in between your legs, both of your chest heaving as you press his hand over your clothed sex, his thumb presses over your clit that is covered by the lace of your panties, now destroyed with your excitation and your eyes flutter at the contact, lips falling open in need of more.

Hyunjin is fascinated by you, watches you in complete ecstasy as he feels white hot flames licking at his cock “you’re so wet angel.” He whispers the words right atop of your lips, kisses them into you and you almost lose it. Bucking into his hand, chasing after his touch.

“All for you.” You mumble back, spreading tempting kisses all over his face, over his lips and then his chin “please take me.”

Hyunjin is all but a strong man. At least not when it comes to you, if only you knew the amount of control and power you had on him. It doesn’t feel like something a mere human should be able to do to him. Has him questioning who you are roaming this earth right next to him. A flutter of your lashes is enough for Hyunjin to be a goner. His hands grip the roots of your hair pulling hard enough to earn a sweet gasp from you, pretty pleading eyes looking up at him has him hardening painfully so in his pants.

“Are you gonna stop acting like a slut if I fuck you?” he jeers, grows amazed at the way you preen under his words, head nodding as if you’re on the verge of death and he’s your only salvation. He rewards you with a quirk of his lips, a brush of his thumb on your inner thigh “go wait for me in your room.” You’re quick to listen, jumping off the counter and hurrying across the kitchen.

Hyunjin doesn’t take long to find you, it left you slightly swaying in excitement like you’re a prey that’s hiding in innocence that is nowhere near real, and when Hyunjin is by your door, the hallway light illuminates his lithe figure. A nervousness mixes with your excitement, leaves your stomach sinking and your fingers clutching the silk of your sheets. It’s a different setting with a similar scene and reversed roles when he walks towards you, eyes heavy and feral and by the time he’s in front of you, you feel breathless.

Your underwear sticks uncomfortably with wetness. Hyunjin’s fingers graze your chin, dragging your attention to him. You look up with wide eyes, soft and fond while his are alight with pure lust for you. He leans down, squeezes himself in your space and takes your lips in a short kiss, too sweet and pure. A juxtaposition to his darkening desires.

“Lie down.” He whispers and you follow with eagerness to please. Obvious in the way you climb up the bed and fall backwards on one of your pillows. Your hair sprawled around you and your night dress rising to give him a glimpse of your lace panties is enough to have him drunk on his desire for you.

Hyunjin stares down at you with a look full of adoration and mix of want. A desire to destroy you, devour you, his hands itch and he follows. A trifling victim to your existence.

Hooking his leg over you, he cups your cheek sweetly, a swipe of candied devotion has you closing your eyes, ashamed to be witnessed in the acts of wanting him, needing him. His hand trails down, brushing over your lips, chin until they’re wrapping around your throat and lets the weight of his hand rest there, not yet adding pressure.

The glazing of your eyes when you open them has him smirking in something akin to winning a prize, you inflate his ego.

“You like it?” he asks, and you don’t answer. Can’t find your voice until his fingers start to slightly press against your throat, just enough to have you struggling for a breath.

“Answer.” His eyes narrow and you gasp softly, a symphony he only wishes to be good enough to play again.

“Yes.”

“Who knew you were this naughty?” he growls, teases his thumb with a swipe on the heart of your throat and you whimper, squirming under his gaze.

“Hyunjin,” you plea, voice doused in desperation and Hyunjin only chuckles darkly, finds himself constantly amazed by the way you always fall apart so easily “mhm?” he looms over you, tilts his head in faux wonder as his grip on your throat relents and he places a bruising kiss there instead.

“Please don’t tease me.” Your eyes are pleading, crumbling in a way that you hope is enough to convey your need. In a way that you hanker is enough to feed his ego just so he’ll spare you. Hyunjin only smiles at you, mean and cruel as his thumb strokes over your cheek.

“didn’t you just tell me you’re mine?” you nod incessantly, yearning for his approval.

“Then be a good girl for me and take it, mhm?” your head lolls to the side in defeat, your whole chest enveloped with warmth at the brush of his lips against yours and it’s soon replaced with his index and middle finger, prodding your bottom lip.

“Open.” His voice drips in dominance, your eyes blink at him obediently before you’re opening your mouth and taking his fingers inside. Hyunjin swallows thickly, eyes lidded as he stares at you, feels the way your tongue swirls around his digits.

“Fuck look at you.” You stare back at him, unrelenting and he almost lets himself deviate at your extant.

“Wish that was my cock in your mouth yeah?” his eyes hover over your lips, filled to the brim with lust and voice breathy, low, and more than anything validating when he sounds as needy as you are. You close your eyes in bliss, moaning around his fingers as the images of what he said flash in your mind. It has you tripping over the edge, your core drips completely soaking the fabric of your panties.

Hyunjin doesn’t say anything as he takes his fingers out, your pouty lips and glazed eyes call for him and he follows as if he’s under a spell. Pressing his lips to yours in a messy kiss, all tongue and teeth and he swallows every sweet sound. Pines for another part of you to keep inside of him.

He leans back, watches in satisfaction the way you surrender yourself to him, fully.

He bunches the rest of very little fabric of your night dress and rid it all the way up exposing the lacy material that’s dripping with the mess of your cunt.

He moves to take your panties off, takes his sweet time to slide the fabric down your smooth legs. You’re spreading your legs for him almost shamelessly, pathetic in your need for him and he’s all but drunk on his ego when he looks at the mess on your puffy pussy. His brushes his thumb between your folds, his eyes imploring naughtily into yours.

“How bad do you want it?” His smirk is almost evil, entranced by you and the way your expression falls, eyebrows dropping and the way your eyes fill prettily with tears, resembles the moon and Hyunjin is nothing but a follower.

“S-so bad,” you whimper, voice on the edge of broken and Hyunjin only tsks, causing your heart to sink.

“Say it like you mean it.” He’s stern and you whine.

“Hyunjin please,” your tears trail over your cheeks like rain on his heart, in the sweetest way, he wonders what is this addicting sugary fondness that covers everything you do under his watching eyes. His heart is in his throat when he leans over you, wishing to repay your sweetness while pressing kisses that are nowhere close, to your tears.

“Shh come on, I know you can do it.”

“Please fuck me,” you writhe under him, your entire body prickles in heat “please I want you so bad.” Hyunjin rewards you with a soft smile, a loving kiss pressing to your cheek “good girl.” His breath tickles you, heart swelling in your chest and the need to please him takes over, driving you right into complete submission. It has you melting on your sheets when his digits finally sink into your warm, wet pussy. Your mouth falls open in a moan, hips rutting against his fingers for more.

You feel it all the over your body, in your veins and running alongside your blood is nothing but a need for him, a longing for the boy you had loved ever since you were sixteen and even now, moons later you’re only ever plunged deeper into this love. Like he had stolen you away and locked you up.

Hyunjin watches you like a hawk, burns the vision of you under him behind his eyelids, wishes to see you every time he closes his eyes. He draws his fingers back, eyeing the way in which your pussy grips them before pushing his fingers forward, your back arches off the bad, mouth spilling sweet mewls and whines. It has his own mouth agape, high on your voice.

“can’t wait to feel you on my cock.” He mummers, absentmindedly and eyes focused on your cunt. He adds a third finger just to see it slowly stretch around his fingers, just to feel you fall apart and thrust your hips forward, wildly in uncontrollable need that takes over you and for him, only ever for him. It’s the telltale of your approaching orgasm, chasing after it. But Hyunjin is a selfish asshole that swears to break you over and over again. Your high is ruthlessly ripped away from you, leaving you with a cry of frustration, more hot tears streaming down your cheeks.

His gaze is dark upon you, heavy and lidded as he brings his fingers to his mouth, closing his pinked lips around them in vaunt. Your tears are marring your eyesight, chest heaving, and you whimper when he moans as if to savor your taste. The sound has you soaking your sheets.

“Please, Hyunjin...”

He stays quiet, his own patience wearing thinner and thinner the more you cry, His expression serious and hungry as he unties the drawstring to his grey sweatpants. He’s impatient, needing you close, so he quickly frees his cock from the shackles of his boxers. He hovers over you, his palm rests next your head, using the other to guide his length between your folds, using you to wet his cock.

Your mouth falls open in mewl, hips bucking and hole clenching in anticipation “Please,” you whimpered pathetically, your arms locking behind his neck. Your touch burns him and sets his heart on fire. He stills, as if he’s captivated by you. His mind was swirling with only the image of you, the smell of you engulfs him. The air is stagnant, the lust surrounding you deepens, fades into love that dances between you two. A dance of temptation to watch which one of you two will fall first.

And it’s always him.

When he takes your lips into his he feels like a prisoner who has been deprived of the light for so long, a yearning so deep in his soul that suddenly devours him whole and snaps when he sinks himself into you, let himself drown in you and you welcome him like he’s coming back home. Right where he belongs, the feeling of your wet walls that swallow him whole has him breaking your kiss, throwing his head back with pleasurable groan as his hips drive into you.

“Fuck waited so long for this,” he slurs, beads of sweat rolling down his forehead and onto you. You who’s nothing but a withering mess under him, you who’s sobbing uncontrollably into his skin and manicured nails digging crescent into his back, leaving yourself all over him.

Hyunjin basks in your kitten like whimpers, in the way you look, your tears that are only ever for him, the clenching of your walls around him has tipping over the edge of insanity. Losing himself in the existence of you, he begins to thrust into you faster, harder, deeper.

“J-Jinnie,” It has your eyes rolling back, mouth agape as your moans are buried within the sheets when you bury your head into your shoulder, drooling all over the silk. The sensation almost too good, pleasure rakes over your body and Hyunjin finds himself following you once again, lost in the waves of your pleasure, he grabs your hand to center himself, entwining his fingers with yours “yeah? Feels good?” his whispers dances along the side of your face, dipping to your neck to litter bruising kisses. Promises of marks for you to remember this night for a little while.

You could only nod, incapable of making a coherent sentence and Hyunjin snaps his hips forward, forces his cock deep inside you “so fucking warm this fucking cunt is mine yeah?” he groans, grinding his pelvis against yours and you cry out, back arching impossibly higher into him, the fabric of your night dress burns your skin “yes! Yes!” his filthy words travel deep inside your core, and warmth spreads inside you, a familiar knot starts to form in your stomach. He looks down at your flushed face, with your mouth heavy and your eyes wet, he finds himself wishing once again he had his phone to take a picture of this specific moment, a picture of you being wrecked by him so he could jerk off to it later.

How does he still want you so badly when he’s inside of you?

You mewl when he grinds you into you, right in your sweet spot, it has your walls clenching around him tighter as your orgasm approaches “you’re gonna cum for me pretty? Mhm?” He rasped out, listening to how wet you were. You don’t answer him, your swollen lips are busy spilling endless pretty sounds that add fuel to his fire, drilling into you just to hear you again and again. He fucked into you like you’ve unlocked a different part of him.

“g-gonna c-cum Jinnie.” You whimper, a buzz reached every inch of you, your muscles tensing, and your stomach tightens.

“Cum all over me baby. All over my cock.” He growls with a bated breath, hips stuttering as his own orgasm approaches him like a tempest, colors explode behind his eyelids and your voice rings in his ears as he fucks you through your orgasm and through his. You felt your cunt gushing around him while he spilled himself into you to complete the process of tainting you, he’s got all of you now.

You close your eyes, overpowered by the exhaustion of your body that you don’t get to linger in because Hyunjin is all over you again, in the throbbing between your legs, the skipping beats of your heart and his lips on yours. Capturing them in a sweet kiss, fond, that renders you breathless when he pulls back to stare at you, his hand squeezes yours with dripping affection.

“I love you.” His own words take him by surprise, had jumped from his heart right to his mouth and spilled right into your face without his permission. A complete betrayal. That sends him into panic, all the pages he had written about doing this the right way rips itself in front of him. They stare at him in defeat.

You fall into a similar surprise, the words echo in your ears and travel down to your chest, has your heart stopping for a mere minute as if you had gone dead for a moment. A moment when those words had come out of his mouth. Your silence makes his stomach twist in sick knots, eyebrows furrowing as he asses you in a tentative dance of your eye contact.

“You don’t have to say anything back. It just slipped i- “

“I love you too, Hyunjin.” Your tears come back like a rain flood, descending gently upon your cheeks, and stabbing at his heart painfully, his thumbs wipe at them gently, a hesitant smile tugging at the corner of his mouth as if his reality and dreams interweave leaving him in a daze. A hue of greying clouds separates and there’s only you.

There’s only you and he’s not entailed to keep looking for you everywhere he goes. You’re here, you never left.

“You do?” he asks, yearning. Hope comes in and takes over every glint in his eyes and your tears somehow multiply, spreading their salty pain through your already aching soul. The graveyard that you had in your heart blooms into lilies instead. Resembles the upcoming spring, the peaches in his scent that clings to your body now, and the warm tinges of pink on his cheeks.

A sense of fatality gripped you, and you pray like a hopeless tragedy for more time. Just a little more time.

“There’s not a day that goes by without me loving you, Hyunjin.”

༶•┈┈୨♡୧┈┈•༶༶•┈┈୨♡୧┈┈•༶༶•┈┈୨♡୧┈┈•༶

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