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#that's just how college is tbh they don't really care about your wellness or you as an individual
iztea · 6 months
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how do you balance between art (any thing in general) and your study , it doesn't... Tick with me since i started college so
anon you are talking to a chronic procrastinator here i don't think i can help you........ but i'll try
i don't exactly see art as a thing i have to do, quite the opposite, i try to avoid drawing as much as i can; it's the equivalent of playing video games or scrolling through social media for me. i do however understand the sentiment and what you meant with the ask so let's pretend it's something i do need to balance
Ideally, what I'd do is I'd find the right time for it (that "it" being art but you can apply it to any other hobby). Reflect on your behaviour and figure out how your energy levels fluctuate throughout the day and when you feel the most motivated. Personally, I am both a morning person and a night owl but a total zombie in the afternoon so i adjust my time accordingly. I leave the more cognitive, complex tasks for the early mornings like schoolwork and draw in the evening because that is when i feel most energized and creative, but ofc your circadian rhythm might look different so see what works for you..
Honestly speaking, i've been looking into time management tips as well and i could tell you of my findings but nothing works on me so it'd be a bit hypocritical. However, in the possibility that you're the Judging MBTI type, what might work for you making To-Do lists and stuff and being as specific+realistic as possible with the time of the day when you'll be doing said task.........idk it doesn't help me but it might help you it seems pretty solid
the only thing that works for me is being very technical about it: Recognize brain patterns so that you can better predict them in the future, do spot them when they happen and correct them accordingly but that's pretty hard and draining cause we are more or less human and flawed so yeah
hope it helped
tl;dr study in the day draw at night
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withleeknow · 1 month
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i think you'll do well with requests bc they seem to be popular in the fanfic side of tumblr! but even if it doesn't take off that quick, at least that'll be less overwhelming bc some ppl can be so demanding....anyways, i hope the best for you in this new journey haha 💝
me personally, i'm not very creative so i'll leave the details to the professionals (aka you) but i'd like to req something from minho's pov. i think those type of stories are SEVERELY lacking in the lee know fics department lol 🥲 it could be a childhood friends to lovers where he is pining for oc but he has a lot of self esteem issues and thinks she's not interested in him. also a big softie and just all around head over heels for her. you can add your magic! (if this is even remotely interesting enough to write lol i just want a minho pov tbh shsjjfjdjdj 😭)
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light years.
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summary: three times minho bites his tongue, and one time you don't let him.
pairing: minho x f!reader genre/warnings: childhood friends to lovers, fluff, angst; kissing, cursing, so much pining i could hurl. could this have been more edited? oh absolutely lmao but i actually don't hate it sooo this is what we're going with :p word count: 4.2k note: to the first anon, thank you so much for your kind words! :') and i'm sorry that this took me longer than expected. i was trying to figure out what i wanted to write for your prompt but then i got the second request with the song and i thought they would go nicely together hehehehe i hope the both of you enjoy thissss
as always, i’d appreciate any thoughts or comments you may have, and please drop a like and/or reblog if you enjoy reading ♡
navigation / request masterlist / ko-fi
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I'm not sure what it means to love But I blink kind of slow around you I'm not sure what it means to love But I'll grow wherever you do What that means, I don't have a clue
I'm Not Sure - Margeaux Beylier
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One.
Minho is 18 years old, and he doesn't know what love is, doesn't really care for it at all.
While his friends are out there wrapped in the clutches of young love - the kind that blooms with stolen glances in classrooms and sticky notes passed in secrecy, Minho finds it simply unnecessary. He doesn't understand it whenever Hyunjin whines about not having a girlfriend because they're still young, they've got all the time in the world for romance later down the line. It's not the end of the world like Hyunjin laments it is.
Minho has his own life to prioritize. College is starting after the summer and he still needs to figure out how he's going to cope with the absence of his cats once he moves away. He's got dancing and he's got his other hobbies to keep him fulfilled and occupied.
And above all, he's got you.
You're getting ready for your sister's wedding when it happens for the first time. Or rather, when it doesn't happen.
You step back into the room where Minho is waiting for you on the sofa, his gaze resting idly on the screen of his phone, scrolling absentmindedly through his friends' group chat even though he has no interest in whatever they're talking about. You cough lightly to indicate your return after disappearing into the bathroom minutes prior to change into your dress. He looks up upon your soft announcement, and when his eyes settle on you, he swears it feels like an invisible force has collided with his chest and knocked all of the air from his lungs.
Throughout all his years of knowing you, inseparable from childhood until now, Minho has never seen you like this - all dolled up with your hair falling over your collarbones, cascading over your shoulders in soft waves that beckons him to run his fingers through. The light blue dress hugs you beautifully, the silky material catching the light from outside the window every time you shift on your feet under his steady gaze.
"So...?" you ask, moving your arms awkwardly behind your back like you're not sure what to do with them. "What do you think?"
What does he think?
Minho thinks you might just be the prettiest girl in the world. He thinks he must have been an idiot his whole life, to have spent most of his waking hours beside you and not once has he noticed how truly breathtaking you are. He thinks about the feeling that spreads in the pit of his stomach, sends warmth throughout his body and makes his heartbeat race a million miles an hours.
Your best friend blinks slowly as he savors the warmth that he's never experienced before. It's similar to the feeling you get when you're sitting under the shade of a big tree on a summer's day. It's comparable to the satisfied tranquility you get after you've just finished a hearty meal. A little hazy in your contentment.
It's not until you probe with a pointed Well? that Minho realizes he's been staring at you in silence for a few minutes now. He swallows thickly, willing away the words that he wants to say but they get lodged in his throat. He reckons it's weird to verbalize them, because it's not how the two of you function. You don't often utter that kind of sentiment out loud and he doesn't either. Never have and likely never will.
In the end, he bites his tongue. "You look presentable," is what he settles on.
You roll your eyes, then reward him with a laugh.
Minho doesn't care about love. He only cares about you.
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Two.
Minho is 21 years old, and he's gotten used to his heart beating erratically whenever he's in your presence.
Three years flew by in the blink of an eye, and graduation is just around the corner. You've always done well in school, straight A student with a track record that most could only dream to have. You put in the hours, you do the work. You deserve everything that you've achieved.
But it's been a challenging few months for you both, being seniors and all. He's had to watch you struggle to stay on top of your classes while also having to slave over a thesis 24/7 until you were sure it was perfect. It reduced you to tears a few times, and Minho was there to hold your hand through it all.
He held you in his comforting embrace when you wanted to give up. He made you dinner when you were too immersed in your schoolwork to notice that you'd forgotten to eat. He was your biggest support system; if it weren't for him, you don't know if you would've made it through.
It's hot outside today, a little unbearable but not uncharacteristic for June. Minho waits in a familiar hallway, the same hall that he's walked past for hundreds of times over the past few years, the same hall that he won't see again once he holds a degree in his hands in only a few weeks' time.
As he sits on an old wooden bench, he bounces his leg as if he's one of the people in the classrooms that line the hall. He doesn't have to be on campus today, but here he is regardless because you're scheduled for your thesis defense this morning. You're in one of those rooms, probably also bouncing your leg from the overwhelming nerves. Minutes feel like hours; you went in there a while ago after he had sent you off with a pat on the head and an encouraging Godspeed.
He's nervous for you, but he's sure that you'll do great. Years of hard work accumulating in what must be the most important moment of your academic journey. You even stayed up all night last night, refusing to sleep a wink just to revise your arguments and talking points.
Minho's head snaps up instantly as he hears a door creak open, the sound of it reverberating throughout the empty hallway like a gong announcing your return from battle. It takes you a few seconds to step out of the room and into his line of sight. He can't see you very well with all this distance between you, but he can still make out the way your frame is visibly shaking with every step you take. He rises to his feet, and you break into a sprint.
He opens his arms wide - a hug of consolation or congratulations, he doesn't know yet - but he still can't seem to brace himself for the collision. You run straight into his embrace, your warms wounding around his middle tightly. Minho feels your tremors, hears your sniffles from where you're pressing your cheek against his shoulder.
"How did it go?" he asks gently.
You start crying then, and he doesn't know if the tears that his shirt is soaking up are those of joy or of grief, but he holds you through it anyway. He swears he can feel every single beat of your heart, hammering so wildly as you're pressed against him like you could sink into him if only you'd push just a little bit more.
"I passed," you say in between sobs. "I got an A."
Minho heaves out the breath that he's been holding ever since you entered that classroom, but it's not like he had any doubt about it to begin with. He hugs you tighter than he's ever had before, and he loves you just the same.
You two must look so dramatic, all wrapped up together in your own little bubble, but who the fuck cares? Although, when another student passes by and coughs, you do break away from him, a little embarrassed for a second.
Even with your hair all mussed up and your flushed cheeks stained with tears, he still thinks you look the same as you did when you were 18 at your sister's wedding. The prettiest girl in the world.
Minho wipes away the wetness on your face with his sleeves, then swipes with gentle thumbs at the moisture that's gathered along your lash lines.
"Holy fucking shit," you breathe out, your shoulders sagging with evident relief, so much more relaxed now that you've done it. "I can't believe it's finally over."
Your best friend can't entirely agree, because he's always believed in you. He's had faith in you since the beginning, since you were mere children laughing and crying together on the playground. You were meant to do great things, this was always crystal clear to Minho.
I love you, he thinks as he smooths a hand over your hair, his chest swelling with nothing but pride and fondness for you. You did so well.
But it's not what he ends up telling you. He swallows it down, washes it away with a dose of regret and longing. He's still not the type to express sappy sentiments, and he's grown accustomed to adoring you only in secret.
"Let's go," he says softly. "I'll buy you dinner."
Minho is still young, he's still got his whole life ahead of him, but he knows what love is now. He knows that it's you.
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Three.
Minho is 24 years old, and he finds it hard to make peace with the fact that you're starting to get out there, that you're finally going on dates now that academics aren't taking up most of your time anymore.
To be fair, none of the guys you've seen have been graced with a second date, and Minho thanks his lucky stars whenever you return from a night out and text him a simple Not it. He knows that it wasn't your decision in the first place, that your mom and your sister have been setting you up on blind dates because they want to see you bring a boyfriend home.
You complain about it all the time, whining about how you're not interested but your family is adamant on it. Minho is well aware, and yet, there's a part of him that's a little shaken, because what if? What if the universe miscalculates and the stars misalign just enough in his misfortune for you to cross paths with someone who's absolutely perfect for you? Someone who's a good man that can give you what you've always deserved to have.
He really doesn't know what he would do if that happens. When it happens?
He doesn't know why you're here tonight either, sitting on a chair on the other side of his kitchen island in a pretty dress when you're supposed to be going on a date in half an hour. The guy apparently works for a big record label, some producer that your sister knows through a friend of a friend.
You look indifferent, kind of bored, as you watch Minho makes dinner for himself. "You seem miserable," he comments, taking a quick break from chopping vegetables to glance up at you. You do look a bit miserable, but you're still the most beautiful in his eyes.
You throw your head back and groan loudly, "Because I am. God, I don't know why they keep making me do this. These guys always give nothing."
"Please elaborate."
"They're all boring suits with tedious routines." you say, and as absentminded as your tone is, it sounds a little pointed to Minho's ears. "They don't make me laugh."
Do they not make you laugh, or do they not make you laugh more than I can?
"Then don't go," he snickers, though there's no humor in his voice at all. "These guys sound like duds. Just tell your sister to fuck off."
"Do you mean that? Do you really think I shouldn't go?"
And there's something in your gaze, something so suddenly expectant in the way you're looking at him that makes Minho wonder. If he says yes, would you listen? Would you stay here with him? Would you stay here for him?
I'm serious. Don't go. You can have this and I'll make myself ramyeon. Just be here with me.
You both stare at each other on either side of his kitchen island for an infinite stretch of time. He feels like your eyes are trying to tell him something that he can't decipher, as if they're sending him signals in a language that he never learned how to read.
For a second there, he indulges himself. He pretends that you're only asking because you want to hear him say it. That you want him to put up a fight and not let you go.
But he bites his tongue because it's become a bad habit. A habit that he can't shake because he simply doesn't have the courage to do so. Because if you stay here tonight, looking like that under the cozy lighting of his living room, he might just spill his secrets and he wouldn't be able to take it when reality comes crashing down and you end up telling him that you've never felt the same way.
"I'm kidding," he musters up the words, and tries to plaster on a smile for your sake, even though he's not sure if you really believe it. "You're dressed up anyway. Go and get a free fancy dinner, if anything."
Minho knows what love is, but his love has always lived in the shadows, his longing has only existed in the dark that it terrifies him just thinking about it meeting the light.
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Four.
Minho is 26 years old, and he's been a coward for the better part of a decade.
Maybe he's loved you for even longer, but he has spent the past eight years head over heels in love with you, and not once has he done anything about it. Never been able to gather enough courage to ask you out, never even hinted at his feelings for you. He loves you from his place by your side and yet, you've never known.
He loves you the most, but he loves you in the worst way that a person can love another - he loves you in silence.
You're the prettiest girl in the world, and Lee Minho is a pathetic coward.
All these years, he's kept quiet and for what? There's always a spot reserved for him right next to you and yet, it feels like he can only watch you from the sidelines, far away from where it really matters, because he doesn't think he can fit into your life the way he truly wants. You taught him what love was, and love, to Minho, is unattainable. Something he can spend the rest of his life yearning for but won't ever have.
Love hurts. Sometimes, all love does is hurt.
"I would've taken you to a nice restaurant if you asked, you know," he says, putting a chocolate cupcake on the coffee table in front of you before he sits down next to you on the fluffy carpet of your living room. He pulls out a candle next, placing it right in the center of the sweet treat.
Your gaze follows his hand has he lights the candle, your eyes glinting with excitement as though you're a child again and your favorite day of the year is still your birthday. The tiny flame curves and bends, dancing to a rhythm that looks like only you can hear. You watch the candle like it's magic, while Minho just watches you, thinking the same thing.
He watches as you close your eyes and clasp your hands together for the theatrics, then you blow out the flame seconds later with a swift breath.
You turn to him with a smile, "I don't need a nice restaurant. This is perfect."
He blinks, and there's that warmth simmering in his belly again. He first felt it when he was 18, and he feels it now. He feels it almost every moment that he spends with you, and he reckons it's only reasonable, because you're his home personified and love can still be beautiful even when it hurts. There's his heart racing again, but that's nothing new to Minho.
He muses over your words. Perfect. Just one simple word is enough to get his hopes up in a way that it really shouldn't.
Your definition of a birthday well spent is in your cozy apartment, eating takeout pizza with your best friend. Perfect, to you, is him baking you a singular chocolate cupcake upon your request and being with him within these four walls, where his fingers occasionally brush yours when you sit next to each other.
Oh, Minho would follow you to the ends of the earth if you asked him to.
He clears his throat lightly, breaking away from your gaze that's full of gratitude and childlike wonder. "What did you wish for?"
"I'm not gonna tell you. It won't come true then."
Wishes don't come true anyway, he thinks, but obviously he won't say it out loud to you, and on your birthday no less. Instead, he diverts his attention to the cupcake, subconsciously tonguing his cheek as he takes a small chunk of the sweet and offers it to you.
You let him feed you even though your eyes are narrowed. "What was that look?" you ask.
"What look?"
"You had a look."
"No, I didn't," Minho insists.
"Yes, you did. You wanted to say something, didn't you?"
He shrugs, popping a piece of cupcake into his own mouth. The answer is yes, he did want to say something, but if you want to get technical about it, then he's wanted to say something for years now. He asks you the same thing every birthday, What did you wish for?, and you would refuse to tell him every time.
"Wishes don't come true," he verbalizes it this time, with a voice that's lighthearted on purpose despite knowing that you wouldn't take it that seriously either way.
You roll your eyes. "Now you're just being pessimistic."
"What? I'm speaking from experience."
"You've never had a birthday wish come true?"
"My birthday wishes haven't come true since I was 18."
Minho feels your eyes on the side of his face, and when you remain quiet for a beat too long, he turns his attention back to you. "What?"
"How do you know they didn't come true?"
"Because..."
Because you've been my wish for almost a decade now. I didn't use to believe in wishes but I always believed in you. Every year, I wish for you to look at me the way I look at you, but it never comes true. Every year, I wish that you would love me back, not just as a friend, but you never do. You are my wish, but you're also the very reason why I know wishes don't come true.
Then he's laughing, but nothing is remotely funny about this. It's your birthday and suddenly all he can think about is how much it stings to be reminded that you're the only thing he'll ever wish for, and still, maybe this simple wish is absurd enough that the universe will never grant him what he truly wants.
"Never mind," he says. "This whole thing is silly."
There he goes, biting his tongue again. Coward.
"No, what were you going to say?"
"You're so bossy today," Minho pretends to complain.
"It's my birthday. Tell me," you press on, and suddenly he can't find any appreciation for your stubbornness that he's adored all his life. You keep your eyes fixed on him when all he wants to do is hide from you.
What is he supposed to say to you? What can he even say? That he's spent more than a third of his life hopelessly enamored with you? That the second he utters any of this out loud, he knows it will be the end of your friendship?
And Minho can't afford to lose you. Even if it hurts, he would rather let love hurt than live in the absence of you.
"Eat your cupcake," he says instead. "I'll get some ice cream."
He makes a move to get up, and the bad habit further cements its place in his subconscious. He's always running away from you when you're supposed to be the person he can be the most open with. This is how he knows he doesn't deserve you.
But you reach for his wrist and it makes him still, the feeling of your hand sliding downward to hold onto his fingers. He's used to the feeling of your smaller hand in his, used to how he can hear his heartbeat in his ears whenever you lace your fingers together.
What he isn't accustomed to, is the look on your face this very second, akin to the one you wore two years ago as you sat on the other side of his kitchen island, asking him if you should go.
Expectant and hopeful; you're holding something back too.
The words that slip from your lips are ones that he never imagined you would say to him.
"I've waited for you long enough."
His poor excuse of retrieving ice cream is all but forgotten as he stares at you, doe-eyed and despairingly confused. "What is that supposed to mean?"
You take a breath, and Minho wonders if this is how he looked every time he wanted to say something only to back down in the end.
Then it all comes rushing out.
"For a while, I thought there might've been something between us, something more than just friendship. I don't know why I thought that, I just had a feeling. On the day of our graduation, I thought you would finally kiss me or at least say something, but you didn't. Whenever I went on dates, I wanted you to tell me not to go, that I was wasting my time with those guys that couldn't make me laugh because they weren't you. You never said anything, you never did anything. I waited every birthday just like I waited tonight. You're still holding it over me and I'm starting to wonder if you really love me too or if I imagined everything this whole time."
Your voice gets smaller toward the end, almost as if the uncertainty takes over you the longer he remains silent. He doesn't have the words for it, doesn't really have the mental capacity to process all of what you just professed. Years and years of longing, of hoping that you would come running into his arms the same way you did on the morning of your thesis defense, and it turns out that you were always the one waiting for him to reach you.
If you really love me too.
Your fingers start to loosen around his but Minho doesn't let you get away, not now and not ever again. Not when he finally knows that he's burnt up enough of your time just because he was too stuck in his head to see that you were holding a hand out for him all along.
He pulls you into his orbit and he likes to imagine that somewhere out there in the infinite universe, two stars collide when he kisses you for the first time, long overdue but still heavenly nonetheless.
He's crying but you don't seem to mind the tears. You're kissing him back and it's really all that matters. He can't think straight but he adores you to the point that his lungs ache.
"I love you," he mumbles against your lips. The sentiment comes out clumsy, half coherent but wholeheartedly sincere. "I'm sorry. I love you, I love you, fuck, I love you."
You're the one who breaks the kiss first, with your hand on his chest gently pushing him away. Panic instantly shoots through him like a lightning strike. These are the words he's been holding back for years, did he not even say them right? Did he fuck things up yet again?
You brush the tears from his cheeks, your voice so impossibly soft when you ask, "Do you mean it?"
Minho splinters into a million pieces, of course he does.
Your name falls from his lips, sounding like a prayer, like the most tender plea that's ever been uttered, "I love you the most. I'm so in love with you that it hurts. I've been yours for so long and I never said anything. Fuck, I-I'm sorry. I love you so much. I'm sorry. I-"
You bring his face to yours once more, shushing him with a kiss that makes him putty in your hands. You tell him that it's okay, and you kiss him like you forgive him. The world could be ending right now, and he doesn't think that either of you would even care very much.
Because you're the only wish of his life, and you kiss him as though you want to make up for the lost years. Because Minho feels like he's 18 again and you're the most beautiful girl in the world, wearing a smile that leaves him breathless in the most wonderful way possible.
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all rights reserved © withleeknow. reposting, translating and/or modifying is not permitted by any means. [posted 06.05.2024]
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dykeomania · 5 months
Text
lovergirl!hazel headcanons
。.。 just some evidence of a love that transcends hunger, tbh.
a/n: i needed a break from writing a fic and wanted to write something sappy. this is the something sappy in question. wanted it to give how-you-become-hazel's-lover -> what she does when you're actually her lover vibe but it just got real mushy. i like it. i hope you like it, too. proofread, but i'm blind as fuck + i'm rusty, so.
tags: gender neutral (i think. i may have fucked up once or twice. please correct me if i did, i proofread fr fr over time. not intended for cis men), body neutral, and poc friendly. some niche reader things (tarot mention, reader wears makeup). mild nsfw -- kissing, making out, heavy petting. almost third base. starts in high school, ends in college.
practice fanfic etiquette. please don't plagiarize or repost my stuff.
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ღ*♡∞:。.。 hazel callahan who sits up straight on the edge of your bathtub and looks up at you in complete awe when you're getting ready. she's got the dumbest, most lovesick puppy look in her eyes as she watches her lover line her lips, and apply a sheer coat of gloss on top. when they turn around to ask if it's even, hazel smiles so wide that it makes the apples of her cheeks sore.
she doesn't really know if it looks okay, she just knows that she wants to kiss you.
she only manages an mhm because it's what you want from her and, well.. at this point, hazel's convinced that she'd drop just about everything to give whatever you want.
you snicker, closing the space between you in slow and steady strides. "what are you looking at, huh?" you teases, grin stretched across lips lined nude, gleaming pink.
"mmm..." hazel can't help but like, drunklenly (she's dead sober).. haphazardly loop you in by the belt loop, head tilting easily to the right. "yyyyyou."
her eyes droop as she falls victim to the familiar spell that you cast over her. one that starts with you taking her face in her hands, and bringing yourself close enough for to take in all at once. she's made dizzy by the smell of your conditioner, made defenseless by the familiar trace of your body wash radiating off of your skin.
"what're you looking at me for?" you grin, your hands hot on her cheeks as you stand between her legs.
"why wouldn't i wanna look at you?" hazel gently manages, hand finding comfortable purchase on your hips. she grips gently with admiration, fingertips pressing into sacred flesh of something, someone, who she couldn't believe is hers. "you're just so pretty."
but let's take a few steps back first,
ღ*♡∞:。.。 hazel callahan who meets you purely by coincidence. you don't go to fight club, and you don't do cheer. you don't have any classes together, you hardly even know of each other. you do, however, have to work concessions for football together one night.
ღ*♡∞:。.。 hazel callahan who doesn't talk much, and honestly standing next to you feels kinda stupid with the bruise that she has on her cheek. she usually never really cares and she's usually super talkative -- she doesn't talk much because well.. she doesn't really know.. how to. how to talk to pretty people -- well, it's not like she finds you pretty, it's just.. anyways,
ღ*♡∞:。.。 hazel callahan who makes some dumb joke about athletes and you kind of snort.. and she's immediately charmed. hazel callahan who has a desire to keep you entertained, and continues to do so throughout the remainder of the game.
ღ*♡∞:。.。 hazel callahan who actually is in your class, but, neither of you just really noticed. hazel callahan who sits next to you in the weeks following. who spends her free periods with you. who eats lunch with you. who eventually gets around to telling you about fight club, over turkey and rye sandwiches.
"so you just, like..." you take a break from chewing, tonguing some bread out of your back molar. "punch the shit out of each other, and it's school-sponsored?"
"...well, yeah. but in like a self-defense, queer way. bring people together, create some solidarity. a safe-space on campus for queer community, kind of thing."
"oh okay, so like, in a slay way," you revise.
hazel stares. scoffing out a gentle laugh. "uh... yeah.." hazel furrows her brows, shaking her head. "um.. what does that.. what does that, like, mean?"
ღ*♡∞:。.。 hazel callahan who becomes your best friend.
ღ*♡∞:。.。 hazel callahan who really likes you. like, as a person.
ღ*♡∞:。.。 hazel callahan who likes you maybe a little bit too much.
ღ*♡∞:。.。 hazel callahan who doesn't know how to embroider, so when you embroidered her converse -- creating a wreath of vines, speckled with bright little flowers around the all star symbol -- she was so happy. but she felt so bad because she didn't know how to repay you.
"let me make it up to you?" she insists, fingers playing with your own, but not creating enough distraction to prevent you from protesting.
"what?" you scoff, subconsciously locking her hands with yours, as though you're about to declare a thumb war. "no, how?"
"i don't know! this is so nice, let me like..." hazel shrugs voice dropping timidly, "..take you out or something."
a beat passes, one that feels like forever. a large enough one to create space for all the butterflies to rumble around both of your stomachs, and for the elephant to pass through the room. hazel can't tell if it's your hand that's begun to sweat in your grasp, or if it's hers.
your eyes narrow at her, grin stretched into something cheshire as you shake your hand, and hers. "i think you just wanna take me out on a date."
hazel smiles sheepishly, cheeks flushing a bright flamingo. she shrugs, next words quiet and intentional,
"so what if i do?"
ღ*♡∞:。.。 hazel callahan doesn't know how to embroider but she does have an eye for wildflowers. when the girl who shows up at your doorstep, it's with a dorky smile, a batch of spring, and a bandaid wrapped around her index finger and her thumb. the flowers that she biked about an hour north to pluck -- from a field she discovered after having simply gone too far -- are bunched together and wrapped in a trader joe's paper bag, the kind that her mom always leaves in the kitchen under the sink. she put the boquet together herself. spent too much time thinking about whether or not you would like the arrangement or the colors, probably went to the store to grab a few of your favorite flowers that she couldn't find.
"oh, these are for you. see, i tried to make this whole thing, like.. semi.. transactional. again, like, i don't really know how to embroider flowers, or like anything really, so... these were next best thing, i guess." she offers, as though it's nothing.
"you look.. really nice." hazel's eyes linger, stricken and dumb. she fills her lungs with air, huffing out her next sentence. "are yoooouuu.. ready to go?"
ღ*♡∞:。.。 hazel callahan who thinks that star signs mean nothing, and doesn't know jackshit about crystals or anything of the like. but hazel callahan who is all eyes and ears, criss-cross-apple-sauce with you on her floor, as she watches you knock your knuckles on a deck of tarot cards and shuffle through them for what you called a "semi unreliable, two-card reading."
hazel callahan who jumps a little when two cards fly out from the deck. who furrows her eyebrows when you turn the over. an the lovers and two of cups, both upright.
"what..." she snorts. "what does that mean?"
"um.." she watches you blush. "it means.." and she blushes when your eyes linger on hers, and then look up. feels her stomach flutter when she watches you take a deep breath in through your nose, like you're shuffling through all of the words in your head.
"...let's just saaaaayyyy... nnnew connections might be coming your way, soon."
hazel has no fucking idea what that means, looking at you, she surely could hope that that's true.
...
ღ*♡∞:。.。 hazel callahan who is shocked that you want to like.. have a sleepover with her. this doesn't really happen to her. like at all. but it's happening with you, so she's down.. but it has to be planned. hazel callahan pulls out all the stops to try to make sure that it's.. well, perfect, she guesses? she makes sure that it's on a weekend where her mom is out of town (not even because she wants to do anything but you know how her mom is). she asks you what all of your favorite snacks are beforehand, and offers to go get more if you run out. she makes sure that you have satin pillowcases if you have textured hair, just in case you forget a bonnet, or anything. probably does that regardless of whether or not that's applicable to you, because she hears it's better for your skin and what not. she gets a weighted blanket for you and some extra pillows + takes out an extra throw if she knows that you get cold easily, or damn near strips her bed down to just one comforter and gets a desk fan to face her bed if she knows that you get too hot.
ღ*♡∞:。.。 hazel callahan who you create a shared movie list with, and who will sit with you and watch all of your favorite movies. all of your least favorite movies. will watch movies that you insist that she must see and will do so with very little fight because it's whatever you want, really. hazel callahan who is very quickly realizing that she would do whatever you wanted, as long as it meant that it got you to smile.
ღ*♡∞:。.。 (hazel callahan who, granted, talks through a lot of those fucking movies. like. hazel callahan who has a really fucking hard time paying attention to movies.)
ღ*♡∞:。.。 hazel callahan who clearly has overthought everything. who laughs at and understands all of your dumb jokes and is always a little shocked when you laugh at hers. who lets you rest your head on her shoulder when you watch movies in her home-theater. who lays with you in her bed and compares your tiktok for you page with hers and finds it a little too easy to poke fun of you. finds it not as easy to remain calm when your head rests comfortably on her chest, and thus hopes to god that all of the cringy tiktok audios are masking the sound of her heart beating out of her chest.
ღ*♡∞:。.。 hazel callahan who looks at you when you mention that it's getting late, and insists that there's a guest room if you wanna sleep in there, or an air mattress that she was supposed to blow up.
"it's too late for that, though." you frown.
"no," hazel, being hazel, is quick to reassure, shaking her head. "no, no, i could totally blow it up. we have an automated pump, it'll take like 20 minutes."
"mm, i don't know, it's still kinda late for all of that..."
hazel blinks at you. her eyebrows raise, corners of her lips gently upturning. "okay. i mean, do you wanna take the guest room?"
you look up at her, eyes big on purpose. "that guest room's kinda scary." you lift a brow. "it's dark. and cold."
hazel thinks she might.. be tripping. she has to be. her blink is slow, and her face knots together, and releases -- the way it does when she gets all timid and indecisive. "o..kay..." she grins nonetheless, furrowing her eyebrows. "so then .. where are you gonna sleep?"
"..i mean.." you burn, and so does she. "...i could just sleep here with you?"
ღ*♡∞:。.。 hazel callahan who can't help but feel girlish and vulnerable laying in her bed with you, her stomach tied in knots over how there is nothing usual about this situation. fully seeing you in your pajamas. feeling the gentle flesh of your bare calves rub against hers. being within such close proximity of you that she can still smell the lingering remnants of soap on your skin from your shower.
ღ*♡∞:。.。 hazel callahan who dares to let her finger dance on your upper bicep, but that's just about it, really.
ღ*♡∞:。.。 hazel callahan who only nudges closer only when you nudge closer. who only lowers her voice, when you lower your voice. who only holds eye contact when you start it, but is always the first to look away.
ღ*♡∞:。.。 hazel callahan who falls into a trap: eye contact held after some conversation that did not, and does not matter. she follows your eyes down, chocolate eyes focusing on the arch of your cupids bow. she does tilt her head up to find her nose nudging softly against the underside of yours. she doesn't know how you two got this close. hazel callahan who feels her hands grow sweaty, feeling your breath linger over her the chap of her lips. who nearly stiffens when she feels your hand press into her back, but instead arches into the crevice your body makes and presses her palm against your hip.
ღ*♡∞:。.。 hazel callahan who does what she thinks she's supposed to do, and kisses you -- soft and gentle, like the whispers that fluttered over both of your lips earlier. brief, and endearing.
her lips stick to yours, and then her lips press into yours. and then her lips open when yours do, and her hand tightens on you when yours does.
ღ*♡∞:。.。 hazel callahan who has no fucking idea what she's doing. like, seriously. she kind of knows -- i mean, okay, yeah, she knows how to kiss, but this is, like.. not just a kiss. hazel's kisses are brief. gentle, maybe a little slow. never this deep. hazel callahan who forgets herself when her fingers weave through your hair. hazel callahan who doesn't recognize the way her breath shakes in your throat when your fingers ambitiously sift through her thick, black locks and pull.
hazel callahan whose lips slot over yours, and unlock. who leans forward when you lean back, and is almost nearly on top of you.
ღ*♡∞:。.。 hazel callahan who doesn't know what to do with her hand, so she puts it everywhere. glides it over your side, presses it over the expanse of your lower back. who smooths her hand under your shirt and marvels in the way your skin burns against her palm. who itches to explore, traversing over your stomach, venturing up, up, and up--
ღ*♡∞:。.。 hazel callahan who stops dead in her tracks when you hum something sour in her mouth and grab her wrist. who looks at you stunned with parted lips as you softly shake your head against hers.
"not yet," you pant, opening your eyes to look at her. "not yet."
ღ*♡∞:。.。 hazel callahan who bats her lashes, dizzy with affection yet sobered from your action. she knows how you sound. not like you're rejecting her, but like you're admitting something, which you.. might be. something that she understands. regardless, she understands.
but she burns bright with embarrassment, stomach rattling with a guilt that crawls up her throat and wraps around it, tightening and tightening...
"yeah," she manages a whispers after a while. somehow, it's still raspy. "yeah, okay.."
"okay.."
"...m'sorry--"
"don't be," you shake your head. "keep kissing me."
you rush, and it's kind of just in time. whatever stinging was lingering in her chest subsides as you bring yourself closer, lips softly capturing her lower lip in affirmation after hazel just stares at you.
hazel callahan who blinks, oscillating between consciences, dazed and a little confused. she's cautious and readjusted, her hand only lingering over your side as she whispers a faint "are you sure..?"
the sentence dissolves when on the tip of hazel's tongue when her lips find yours again, at your action, which is her answer. hazel callahan who listens. who lets you take her hand and place it somewhere that feels more comfortable, somewhere that's right and yet still sensual.
ღ*♡∞:。.。 hazel callahan who is wiped, but intentional with every kiss that either you or her leads, every swipe of her lips over your jaw, every tender kiss that you let her place against the stretch of your neck.
ღ*♡∞:。.。 hazel callahan who will admire within her bounds. kissing you, and drowning in you until she is simply too sleepy to continue. until she is dizzy and feels comfortable enough to nuzzle her face somewhere into the crook of you, breathing you in until you become a part of her dreams,
and she will wake -- in the morning, and in the middle of the night -- only to have a hard time believing that she isn't still dreaming.
...
ღ*♡∞:。.。 hazel callahan who kind of has to get used to.. all of it. who crushes, even though she's already "achieved," so to speak. who grins at her phone when she's texted, who finds any excuse to facetime you and keep you on the line -- sometimes just so that she can look at you. who finds any excuse to be around you.
ღ*♡∞:。.。 hazel callahan who you can't get rid of once you go both go to college. who facetimes you whenever, who visits you on weekends. who comes into your space and steals all of your sweatshirts and your pajama pants and of course, all of your spare time.
ღ*♡∞:。.。 hazel "no, i can make that for you" callahan who can't embroider, but can crochet. she will buy you that jellycat that you really want, a hundred percent. hazel callahan will also greet you with a fucked up rendition of said stuffed animal that you wanted (giving jamdog, perhaps) and furrows her eyebrows when you have to hide your laugh with your hand.
"what?" she asks, grin dulling only for a moment. "do you not like it?"
"no it's--" you cover your mouth. "it's perfect." you cackle. when you cup her cheeks, all the worry and fear of judgement fades. sort of. at least enough. "you're perfect, babe. i love it."
ღ*♡∞:。.。 hazel callahan who does, in fact, keep a picture in her wallet of her lover, ready at all times. hazel callahan who weaves her lover into casual conversation.
ღ*♡∞:。.。 hazel callahan who still doesn't really understand figure of speech all that well so when you say things like "i wish you could just come over," she literally goes "..well like, i could,"
and then proceeds to make like, a three hour drive.
ღ*♡∞:。.。 hazel callahan who keeps the picture that you hate of yourself as her lockscreen and it's not to spite you, it's because she thinks you're beautiful, and she has no idea what you're talking about.
ღ*♡∞:。.。 hazel callahan who figures out what names you like to be called by throwing everything at a wall and seeing that sticks. pretty. handsome. lover. angel. baby. and when she does find one, one that makes you blush just about as hard as she does every time you even look in her direction, she holds it over your head to high heavens. makes it your contact name. uses it to punctuate reassuring sentences, when she greets you, when she tells you goodnight.
ღ*♡∞:。.。 hazel callahan who gets to take you on real dates, and gets excited to. who gets giddy when you get ready. who gets to fix your hair and come up behind you when you take mirror selfies once you're finished. who now feels comfortable enough to place her hands at the mid-point of your waist and let them venture toward your frontside while she rests her chin on your shoulder, and leans in to kiss your cheek. who tells you you smell nice, and makes you smile when she buries her face into some part of you and literally just goes rahhhh!!!!
ღ*♡∞:。.。 hazel callahan who is also stuck sometimes, in moment such as these, watching the wonder who she has had a crush on since high school -- jesus, has it really been that long? -- with gentle eyes and a completely disarmed disposition.
hazel callahan who is honestly such a fucking loser -- like, literally, loser-since-birth, no-hope-since-middle-school, gay-haircut-and-new-repotoire-can't-save-you, loser, and can't help but ponder and marvel over how someone like you is in her hands. in her face. in her life.
"m'not that pretty," you insist, fingers weaving through her hair, nails etching at hazel's scalp in a way that hazel has grown to like. love, even.
her eyes flicker over your face, smile lopsided and eyes heavy like despite everything, you don't even know the half of it. she scoffs, voice hardly above a whisper,
"yeah no, you are so much more than pretty."
672 notes · View notes
romanticintheory · 2 months
Note
Okay but could u write something fluffy with soap. Tbh I feel like he'd be the best friend to lovers kinda thing.
AND YOU ARE ABSOLUTELY RIGHT i love friends to lovers so much guys u don't understand :(
also, i realize now that this isn't super fluff-heavy!! apologies </3 i got carried away.
johnny "soap" mactavish x gn!reader
warnings: horrid scottish slang from a non-scot (i am sincerely sorry), my writing from 2 am on three hours of sleep (also sincerely sorry)
-
-best friend to lovers with soap except there wasn't really a specific moment you two become each other's. it just... kind of happened.
-growing up with him and supporting his dreams to be a soldier while he supported yours. the first time he came back from a mission, you were the first person he wanted to see once he was allowed back home.
-you used to fuss over any injuries he got from being himself as a little kid, and the worry only heightened when he'd come back from missions with real wounds.
-his mom would always have a cheeky smile seeing you two together. she never said it, but it was always hinted in the way she acted. she was always talking to johnny about how you were such an impressive and loyal young person, often doting on you and insisting you stay for dinner (which, of course, you couldn't refuse).
-the first time johnny started dating someone, it was hard for you to deal with, but it got easier the more it happened.
-what you didn't know was johnny would take it even worse whenever you told him you started dating someone. he'd act all proud and protective in a brotherly fashion, but behind closed doors he was scowling to himself without knowing why.
-one day, you're visiting him in his apartment after he had been away for a few months. you're strangely more subdued than usual, and of course he notices.
-"hey," he calls to you softly, a strange contrast to his usual loud self. "what's wrong?"
-"nothing, don't worry about it," you reassure him, fiddling with the little plushie he got you from his travels--one of the many trinkets he's gotten for you. he always says it's to make up for the fact that he won't be there to bother you in person, but it's actually because every precious little thing he sees reminds him of you.
-"ah ken you're lying," he tells you in a warning tone.
-"i got broken up with, is all," you admit, turning your head away from him.
-"what?" he booms incredulously. how could anyone leave you? "is he insane? after getting an apartment together?"
-"there was this girl from his work and, well, i don't know," you shrugged, fighting back the tears you thought had dried days ago. "he wants the apartment. i mean, he did pay for more of it so-"
-"come live with me."
-it was your turn to be in disbelief, turning your head to face him with a confused look on your face.
-"what?"
-"th' place is empty with me at work. no rent, 's away from yer stupid ex, and ye get to be around me," he added jokingly. you rolled your eyes, but how could you not take him up on his offer?
-from then on, you're living with your best friend and taking care of the place while he's away. if you're staying rent-free, the least you could do was try and be as neat as possible (he insisted it was okay with the place looked like it was lived in, but you refused).
-when he'd come back from his missions, he'd still shower you in little gifts he'd get along the way when possible. you always tried to have some kind of meal ready for him, too.
-"you're always cooking for us, a'm feeling like i should do it sometime," he says, already knowing the answer to that proposal.
-"absolutely not." (the one time you let him cook was when you were both in college. he caught a pan on fire, somehow.)
-"you hurt me!"
-"oh, please."
-eventually, the routine becomes more and more domestic to the two of you. soap's mother always calls out how you two are living like a married couple, but the both of you just laugh it off like neither of you have noticed.
-you eventually notice changes in johnny's gifts. it went from gag gifts and plushies to little pieces of jewelry or intricate pens. sometimes you even think you catch him staring at you, but maybe it was just wishful thinking. he hasn't mentioned being interested in anyone in a while, either.
-it all comes to a head when johnny doesn't come home the day he said he would. sure, it happened at times, but this was the longest amount of time he's been late.
-eventually, he finally walks through the door with too many injuries, a bruise on his lip, and walking with a rough limp.
-you tend to him immediately, of course, interrogating him on what his doctor told him he should do to take care of his healing wounds. the rest of the night goes just like how the others have gone, with you making sure he's fed, warm, and resting.
-by the time you're closing his window for him, you're absolutely exhausted. you had barely gotten any sleep because of johnny's delayed return. normally, you would've let him do more for himself, but the extent of his injuries was worrying you.
-"ye ken am alright, aye?" he asks you in that low, rich voice, searching your eyes for something other than worry and sleepiness. he's sitting up in his bed by the time you walk back to him (despite the fact that you told him to lay down).
-"you're injured. you came home late."
-"what? ye have no faith in me?" he mocks hurt, trying to put a smile on your face or at least get an exhale of amusement out of you, but you weren't in the mood. he could tell by the way you didn't respond and the permanent but subtle frown on your face.
-"i know you're good at your job, johnny," you finally say, ready to call it a night.
-"good. then ye know i'll always come back home to ye, aye?"
-you swallowed the lump in your throat and nodded, too tired to overthink about what he just said.
-"come here," he orders quietly, reaching out to you.
-gently, he coaxes you into laying next to him. the last time you ever slept in the same bed as johnny was when you two were kids. you were having a sleepover at his house with you in his bed and him on a spare mattress. you had a nightmare so bad it woke johnny up, but instead of brushing it off and making a joke of it, he jumped into bed with you and hugged you protectively. he said it was a good way to train for becoming a soldier, and you couldn't help but snort with laughter.
-just like back then, you had an easy time falling asleep in his arms, now.
-you woke up that morning well-rested and still encased in johnny's arms, which was impressive considering the fact that most times he sleeps in a position that looks like he flung himself across the bed.
-when he wakes up, you sit up with the intention getting breakfast up and running, but johnny doesn't like that idea.
-"johnny, it's almost eleven. we have to eat something," you chide, trying to get out of his impossibly strong grasp.
-"ye get all sad when am gone but yer trying to leave, now?"
-"well, i suppose if you're well enough to joke, you're well enough to clean the rest of the house and cook, yeah?"
-he lets go of you immediately in a comical fashion, and you have to catch yourself as you hurl out of bed from the built momentum of your escape. you look back at him with a seriously? look on your face as he laughs at your near fall.
-"doesn't that hurt?" you question him, remembering the bruise and cut near his lips and throat.
-"maybe a little," he admits. "kiss it better?"
-the grin on his face makes you think he was setting you up for that one. how could he be so confident?
-just like the times when his mother called you two a married couple, you laughed it off and headed to the kitchen to start breakfast.
-that wasn't the only time johnny's behavior changed noticeably. now, his longing stares at you were more blatant than ever. he'd hold you by the waist if he was moving past you and even told someone flirting with him "oh, i've got someone at home," while he was on call with you on the other end.
-what more could you do than accept it? it wasn't like you didn't like it, anyway.
-one night, you're both in the dining room with you standing and him sitting down on a chair. his hands are on your waist with his legs on either side of you as you reapply a band-aid to his temple (something he could very well do on his own, but any excuse to be close to you, right?).
-as you finish putting it on, your attention draws itself to his lip nearly healed. gently ghosting your finger across the barely visible bruise, you murmur, "good to see this one's basically healed."
-"awe, but it isn't," he corrects you, a slight pout on his face.
-"it isn't?"
-"no, still hurts like hell." you should've seen this one coming. "kiss it better?"
-"that's the second time you've asked me," you were rolling your eyes as you withdrew your hand from his face, but he caught your hand in his.
-"am being serious, (n/n), only a kiss'll make it better," he insists, that damn smile back on his face.
-you couldn't help but wonder if he was actually being serious or just pulling your leg.
-"how could you be so sure?" you challenged him.
-"seen it in ma dreams." oh, that was a funny one.
-"you dream about kissing people to heal your wounds?" you ask through the remnants of your laughter, but he's still looking at you with that same far-off smile on his face.
-"no, just of you."
-there's a pause between the two of you as you process what he said.
-"oh."
-he squeezes your hand with an expectant look in his eyes, like he knew you were head over heels just as much as he was for you.
-you cleared your throat and tried to ignore the searing burning in your cheeks. "well, i guess if you dreamt it, it must be true," you tell him.
-he places his unoccupied hand under your chin and guides your face to his, but he doesn't close the gap. it was like he was waiting--making sure you really wanted to go through with this.
-but you do, so you press your lips to his and he lets go of your face to put his palm on the small of your back, pulling you impossibly closer toward him.
-later that night, when you're back in his arms watching your guys' favorite show and he's calling his mother to tell her the news, you can hear her shrieks of excitement coming through the phone.
-the only thing you don't hear is when she asks, "when's th' wedding?"
-"soon, hopefully," he looks at you leaning against him, head pressed against his shoulder and arm clinging to his like it was meant to be. "but there's no rush. a've waited this long, aye?"
188 notes · View notes
write-tama · 2 months
Note
I need more of Francis Mosses x reader fluff tbh and I enjoy reading some of your works with him so here's my request: Reader is stressed about life, college or something of your choice and needed some comfort from him 🥺🤎 thank you in advance aaahshqhs 😭 (tbh I don't see much sfw works of Francis on this app, maybe I'm not searching enough?)
"rest a little-- for me at least.."
˚₊· ͟͟͞͞➳❥ francis mosses x student!stressed!reader
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sypnosis ; reader and francis have been hard at work trying to achieve their ultimate goals for the future. but lately, reader has been burning themselves out, and its up to francis to help realize how tired reader is.
containing ; exhaustion, reader is a college student, francis works double shifts, francis and reader are high school sweethearts (in this au anastacha is not his daughter), francis is worried about reader, TOOTH ACHING FLUFF RAGH
author’s note ; eee thank u anon! also dw, i also experienced the same problem trying to find sfw for francis 😭😭 its lowkey the reason why i had to crawl out of my hiatus hole LOL but ya really hope u enjoy :]
04.15.24 | 1.4k words
-ˋˏ✄┈┈┈┈
Five shots of espresso from the cafe across the block could not fix how fucking exhausted you were.
You and Francis have been together since your highschool days. You have always dreamed of going to college to become a forensic scientist to work in the police force for super interesting crimes— but holy shit— were you tired from the projects and the essays.
You haven’t seen Francis in a few days either, despite living in the same apartment. He’s been working shifts in the morning and night just to make ends meet while also saving up for a house that you two could buy together. It was exhausting, but it was all a part of the plan. You worked a little side job as well delivering papers early in the morning just as a quick cash grab, but that also meant you barely spent mornings with your boyfriend. It’s not like you guys had the time anyway. He had to work in the morning too, which made it all the more frustrating.
After finally reaching your apartment, you immediately kicked off your shoes and threw your bag to the nearest corner before flopping down on the couch. A loud groan rumbled from your throat, finally giving your exhaustion a voice. You looked up from the couch, too tired to even turn on the TV. From the corner of your eye though, you saw in the kitchen a pot on the stove with a bright yellow sticky note on the top of it. Out of curiosity, you lifted yourself from the cushions with all your strength before heading towards the kitchen.
You waddled over to the pot with a curious tilt to your head as read the sticky note:
You left for work before I could tell you, but I’m coming off my shift early today and I’m not working tonight. Here’s some lunch I prepared this morning. Love you honey, get some rest. -Fran
Your grin stretched from ear-to-ear as you opened the lid to be welcomed with the smell of fresh spaghetti and meatballs. You turned on the gas stove to heat up the food, and used a clean wooden spoon to stir the food gradually. As you did, you couldn’t help as yawns escaped your mouth. You thought about taking a nap after your meal, seeing as how later today you needed to take some notes for an upcoming exam.
Your need for success never gave you the permission to give yourself a break every once in a while. In fact, the only times you did take a break was when Francis was sick and he needed someone by his side to take care of him. Other than that, you were always academically focused. Every once in a while, Francis would voice his opinion, telling you that you shouldn’t be burning yourself out so fast, but it was your determination and your vision of a perfect future with him that fueled you. Was this safe for your own mental health? Absolutely not. But you were aware of the consequences, and you pushed yourself anyway.
You felt your body grow increasingly heavy. You quickly jolted your head up, not even realizing that your eyes were fluttered close and you had stopping moving your spoon for a few seconds. You shook yourself awake, quickly grabbing a plate and helping yourself to a serving. You made sure to turn off the stove as well before throwing the spoon in the sink and grabbing a clean metal fork to enjoy your meal. It was best to hurry on and sit down before you became a danger to yourself.
You placed your food down on the coffee table before curling up on the couch. Maybe some TV would wake me up, you thought to yourself. You picked up the TV remote and browsed through the channels, eventually settling on a random game show that was airing live. Feeling a bit more energized, you placed a pillow in your lap before resting your food on top of it.
After each bite you felt your eyelids getting heavy. Your body started slowly giving in, despite your protests. The host’s voice soon turned into muffles as you felt your head nod a little. Each time you felt yourself falling, you immediately jolted up, not wanting to succumb to your body’s need for rest. What you really needed to do was to finish those essays and projects, and to also greet your loving boyfriend once he comes back from work. Your mind started dragging along little plans on how you would be able to accomplish everything before sleeping, but without realizing, your eyes had fallen closed as you leaned back in the couch.
Francis came back home about an hour later, tired from his work. As he placed his work bag down, he barely realized that your bag was set in the corner as well. “(y/n)?” He began to call out, but as soon as he turned around, he noticed your sleeping figure on the couch curled up with your pillow and food next to you. “Oh, (y/n)..” he mumbled, smiling a little in amusement. Francis walked over you, noticing the running TV and the half-eaten food. He first turned off the TV, making sure to not make too much noise to wake you up. He took your plate as well and covered it with a napkin before storing it in the fridge. Once Francis made it back to the living room, he sighed in relief, noticing that you still haven’t woken up. He rolled up his sleeves before carefully sliding his arms under your body, being as gentle as possible as he carried you to the bedroom.
“Mm..” You mumbled, half asleep. “Franci..?” You croaked out, burying yourself into his chest.
“Mhm..” He hummed. “I found you asleep on the couch.. I’m just moving you to the bedroom if you don’t mind..” He chuckled a little. You groaned a little in response, tugging a little at his button-down uniform.
“No..” you protested. “I have work to do.. I have projects due soon..”
Francis laid you gently down onto the soft mattress. You sat up a bit, realizing that you were still in your casual formal clothes you wore for school. You looked over to Francis, who had changed out of his work clothes, but kept his undershirt on and threw on some pajama pants. “Franci, can you—”
“Here you go.” You looked up, not even realizing that he was already handing you your midnight clothes. His tired eyes gazed upon you, but even then, his eyes were dilated with genuine care. You smiled up at him before taking the clothes and changing on the bed, throwing your clothes in a corner.
You sighed a little as you straightened out your shorts, looking down with a wearied face. “You know I need to get back to work.” You quietly muttered. Francis looked at you with a frown as he stood over the bed.
“You can’t just keep working day and night.” He lectured softly. You scoffed a little before looking at him, only to immediately falter to his puppy-eyed look. “Just rest with me this evening, please, dear?” He asked, folding his arms behind his back as he leaned down.
Your face heated up, flustered at how desperate Francis seemed to be just wanting to have a few minutes ago. You smiled softly before reaching up and caressing his face with your hand. “You know I hate it when you look at me like that..” You whispered.
“Well, it's the only way to get you to agree.” He mumbled back, sinking into your embrace. The two of you were locked in eye contact as Francis slowly climbed into the bed. His hands straddled either side of you as you leaned back against the headboard. Gradually, his lips pressed against yours, and immediately you melted. Your hands snaked around his neck, holding him as close as you could. His touch filled you with the warmth you longed for so long after drawn-out lectures and pressure-inducing assignments. All you wanted was him.
He wrapped your arms around your waist before resting himself on your chest— a sigh escaping his nostrils. “I miss this.” he muttered. “When was the last time we got to hold each other like this?”
You ran fingers through his hair, carefully tugging out knots. “Only heaven knows..” You whispered back. The two of you enjoyed the comfortable silence. Only the faint hum of the lamp filled your ears as well as the occasional vehicle rushing down the road in front of your apartment complex. Your chest rose and fell as you breathed as Francis buried himself deeper into your embrace. “I-I’m sorry I’ve been a little difficult lately.” you apologized, feeling the guilt prick at your skin. “I’ve just been so stressed with school lately.. All I could think about is work and it's ruining us—”
“Please don’t apologize for that.” Francis was quick to cut you off. He lifted his head up and now sat up properly in front of you. His eyebrows furrowed a little as he looked at your gentle figure. “Please.. Just don’t. I understand you’ve been working so hard lately. I have been to. But this is all for our future, remember?” He grabbed your hand, holding it with both of his hands before kissing your knuckles. “Mmm.. I miss our evenings together too, I truly do, but what I’m concerned about is your wellbeing. You need to give yourself a breather every once in a while. At least promise me that.”
Your body felt weak with each work he uttered. Your head rushed with stars, remembering that its moments like these that make you want to work so hard. You want nothing but blessings for this man, because if anything, he was your savior. Tears pricked at your eyes, sniffling a little as you nodded your head.
“I promise..” You said in a shaky voice. A sincere smile curled Francis lips as he reached down to kiss your forehead.
Everything is going to be okay, you thought to yourself.
Everything is okay.
-ˋˏ✄┈┈┈┈
thats it! hope you enjoyed :3 sorry i procrastinated on this for a while im def gonna clutch on up writing after school ends (which is end of april). lowk so glad this bc ive been stressed w college work as well so rereading honestly felt SO comforting 😭😭 but anyway ya--
reblogs, likes, even replies are soso appreciated and i hope you enjoyed this story :]
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kakujis · 9 months
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what do i call you?;
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summary: oliver thinks you'll be easy, just like the other girls he's slept with. but things are different when you don't cave in like he wants. pt 1 | 2
warnings: college!au, afab!fem reader, fratboy!oliver, wildcard!kunigami, this one is a bit angsty, oliver is actually a big softie, situationships, implied fwb with kunigami + karasu, one sided pining (oliver), oral f!receiving, praise, pet names, p*ssyjob, swearing, mentions of drinking, reader is confused on her feelings, if i missed anything lmk, around 7.1k
an: this took me literal months... send help. well, it's finally here! after months of sitting in my drafts half written, i was able to finish it. if the smut is bad, i'm sorry idk how i did it before LMFAO. thanks to zen for letting me ramble about this in their dms for months. tbh i think this is the longest fic i've written so far and ofc it's about this guy LOL. also, i may or may not have a mini playlist for this so lmk if u any of u would like the link :>. resident of: @enchantedforest-network
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the first time you “meet” oliver aiku, it’s the morning after you were a drunken mess on your best friend’s back. it’s not that he’s surprised to see someone that isn’t sendou shuto in his kitchen, it’s the fact that you’re not walking out yet. instead, you fix yourself a bowl of cereal, barely paying any mind to the brunette watching you. before he can speak you leave, padding back to sendou’s room. 
the second time happens when he catches a glimpse of you in the library with karasu tabito. your arms hanging around his shoulders in a back hug, as you peer down at his laptop. he notes the proximity and nonchalant demeanor of karasu, typing away while he talks to you about his latest class, even with your cheek pressed against his. maybe you’re his girlfriend, he thinks, before shrugging and moving on. 
the third time happens when you stumble down a hallway at a party, bumping into him as you giggle out a quick, “sorry!” but kunigami rensuke isn’t far behind, grabbing your hand and scolding you before he offers an half assed apology as well. he doesn’t think much of it, preoccupied by his own date, until he sees kunigami pick you up as you babble in his ear about something. 
the official meeting is when you’re having a movie night with sendou at his dorm again. your head lays in the red head’s lap, texting your friends as you give distracted “mhm”s to whatever sendou’s saying. 
“are you even paying attention?” sendou asks, eyes flickering between you and the screen. before shoving a handful of popcorn into his mouth. 
“sen, i really don’t care about whichever gravure idol you’re into right now.” you reply, before your lips curve up into a smile at whatever text you’re reading. 
for once, he’s unsure what this feeling is inside him. is it jealousy? awe? he can’t pinpoint the reason why his dual toned eyes always trail to you, taking in your pretty form. but he’s oliver aiku, he could probably get into your pants if he tried hard enough. 
he slides down onto the couch, slinging an arm over sendou. “whatcha watchin’?” he’s not really paying attention to what’s on the tv, their voices muffled as he notes your form through his peripheral. 
the red-head shrugs, “some romcom that she picked out and isn’t even watching.” he pokes your head, “at least introduce yourself.” 
“mm?” you hum, moving your phone away to peek up at oliver. from the way you’re positioned you’re viewing him upside down. you readjust, twisting and pushing yourself up onto your knees, leaning over with one outstretched hand. “hi, i’m y/n.” 
“you’re blocking the screen!” sendou exclaims, but you don’t move, eyes locked on the brunette across from you. 
oliver tries his best not to leer, really, but he drinks you up with his eyes. it’s hard not to since you’re wearing a shirt that’s clearly too big with the way it falls off one shoulder. he thinks you’d look pretty underneath him and wonders if you make even prettier sounds.
he reaches over to shake your hand, to sendou’s dismay, and maybe it’s cliche but he swears he feels a spark for the very first time. it’s something that gets his heart racing, something new and exciting. 
“i’m oliver, nice to officially meet you.” 
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the upcoming months blur and melt into each other, there’s not much to be noted. beyond you coming over every so often to hang out with sendou, what is there beyond soccer practice, classes half paid attention to, and meaningless hookups? frat parties? sure, you both attend them. with each other? not necessarily. 
no, you continue to evade oliver aiku’s grasp. 
“i can’t,” the text reads, “i promised to go with kunigami.” 
he frowns, before typing back: “maybe next time then?” 
“maybe.” 
it’s fine, he thinks, fixing himself another cup of alcohol. he’ll find another girl, it’s easy. but even the ones he’s been with before, the ones who always answer his texts for a quick fuck are starting to bore him. 
it doesn’t help that when you arrive you look so good or that you excitedly greet everyone with a smile and a hug. his hands always linger on the small of your back until you pull away, scampering back over to your date. 
it’s confusing, you swear up and down that you aren’t dating kunigami, but anyone would think you’re with him. especially when your arms are always laced around him, body pressed against his as the two of you talk. he’s always wondered what you could possibly be talking about, kunigami isn’t much for words let alone full blown conversations. but maybe he’s like oliver, fallen deep for how easy it is to talk to you. 
seconds tick into minutes, which turn to hours and before either of you knows it, you’re tipsy, lips curled into a smile as you giggle and shout while your friends play beer bong. he leans against the wall with sendou, trying his best to not stare. 
“you could try talking to her more.” his friend says, breaking the silence between the two. “or are you just gonna stare at her forever?” 
“is she with kunigami or not?” he asks, ignoring the question, “every time i ask her out i get turned down.” 
“yeah, i dunno either, she doesn’t really answer that.” sendou replies, taking another sip of his beer. “i think she’s just messing around, if that helps.” 
if that helps - oliver is pretty sure it doesn’t, but he knows sendou isn’t going to tell him everything. still, the vague response pisses him off. 
there’s also the fact that the two of you have similar friend groups and that you’re a clingy drunk that throws him off. when he finds you in kunigami’s arms again, dozing away in the crook of his neck, the grip intensifies on his cup, indenting the red plastic. his close friends notice it too, the weight of his stare is heavy as if there’s on a spotlight right where you’re sitting. 
but he puts the facade back on when another girl approaches, a welcoming distraction. she’s cute and he recognizes her as being part of his fraternity’s sister sorority. unfortunately, he just can’t focus on her and what she’s saying. his eyes continue to flicker back to you, hot jealousy continuing to bubble in his stomach when he sees kunigami’s hand rub circles on your inner thigh. 
the girl is still talking and he’s doing his best to at least nod when she finishes a sentence. but the final straw is when you sleepily smile at kunigami, as he reads your lips, ‘that tickles!’. 
“hey,” he interrupts, grabbing the closest friend to him, “could you excuse me for a second? by the way, this is sendou.” 
it was brief but for a moment, sendou felt it. the too tight grip on his shoulder and the nails digging into his skin through this cotton tee indicated one thing: jealousy. but before he can speak, oliver’s maneuvering his way through the crowd with a one track mind. 
when he makes it over to you, your grip on kunigami’s shirt is so tight as his hand continues snaking it’s way under the hem of your skirt. you’re not sure if the heat is coming from desire or the alcohol swimming through your veins. your gaze is something oliver’s seen before with countless other girls, it’s sweet, but laced with want. 
“hey, pretty girl.” he says, voice cutting through the air like a knife. 
you tear away from kunigami’s gaze, smiling cutely when you see who it is. “oliver~ hii,” you sing, twisting a little out of the ginger’s grasp to reach your arms out towards him. “come, come.” 
his heart thumps against his chest and he moves closer to bend down and give you a side hug. “what’s up?” 
“mm, nothin’,” you chime, tilting your head to the side, “just hangin’ out, right rennie?” 
rensuke nods, but his eyes are locked on oliver, clearly annoyed at the interruption. his arm finds it’s way around your waist, pulling you closer. 
as fast as you make oliver’s heart race, you’re just as quick to make it drop. it’s a nickname and nothing more, right? so why does it feel like he’s going to throw up? something that sounds sweet on your tongue feels sour on his. 
there’s something beyond the disdain that he hides behind his forced smile and if oliver's one thing, it’s petty. 
“aren’t you a little too drunk, y/n?” he asks, grabbing your arm before pulling you up, maybe it’s the irritation but he almost yanks you out of the ginger’s grip. 
it catches rensuke off guard as you stumble up and out of his lap. you’re shaky on your feet, but oliver’s there to replace not only kunigami but any thought inside your pretty head. 
if you weren’t so drunk you’d probably notice the hammering of his heart as you wrap your arms around his neck for stability. 
“carry me?” you slur and he nods, chest swelling with pride because tonight he won. 
“of course, wouldn’t want anyone takin’ advantage of you.” he smirks, leveling his gaze with kunigami. 
if he was being honest, he would probably lose if he got into a fight with him. yet, the sweet satisfaction that he can hold onto in this moment overtakes that thought. with your head on his shoulder, you start to doze off, missing the way kunigami stands with balled fists. 
“what do you think you’re doing, aiku?” he starts, before moving forward, but oliver steps back.   
“making sure y/n’s alright,” he says, “besides you were pretty touchy just now.” 
“cause she’s my date.” he states, starting to get irritated with how every step he takes forward oliver takes another back. 
“and she’s had too much to drink, right y/n?” you mumble something incoherent and oliver nods. “see?”
the air is tense. not only is oliver edging kunigami on but the group playing beer pong has noticed and quieted down. before things continue to escalate, karasu swings by, wrapping an arm around the wildcard’s shoulders. 
“oi, rensuke we need someone to fill in fer otoya.” he says, eyeing oliver as well. if only he could laugh at the irony. 
if it isn’t number one and number two. he thinks, recalling the amount of time he’s seen you, arms linked with karasu’s as you wander the halls to your next class. but three is the luckiest number, or so he’ll hope. and besides, hierarchies can always change.
rensuke’s quick to shrug the crow off, the scowl on his face ever present, but tabito doesn’t seem to mind. he’s too focused on the sleeping girl in oliver’s arms. 
“well, i don’t really feel like fighting today,” oliver continues, “so we’ll be on our way.” he walks off before the other two can get a word out, nodding to sendou who seems pleased to talk to someone about himself. 
there’s only the sound of the shoes on pavement as oliver walks you home. nestled in his arms, you sometimes perk up to mumble something incoherent or make a noise in his ear. he doesn’t mind, the campus is nice and quiet at night. 
“oliverr,” you slur out, “where are we goin?” 
“home, princess.” he answers, making sure to call you all the nicknames he wants. 
“your dorm?” you ask and he swears the red tips of his ears are from the cold. but it’s not cold at all, it’s the middle spring semester. 
“if you want?” he jokes, before quickly adding, “nah, yours.” he’s told himself before that if he waits it out, he’ll get to you. but it’s been a few months of this back and forth, where you feel so close yet so far. 
“we can’t go to my place!” you whine, “i forgot my key.” 
“and where’s your roommate?” he asks, stopping, because he’s realized another thing. he doesn’t even know where your dorm is. 
“at the party,” you pout, before pulling away and looking at him. “you’re cute, oliver. you should date her.” 
he gives a dry laugh, heart only semi-crushed. you think he’s cute. he’ll take it, especially when it’s beat accelerates further when you push his bangs back. 
“sweaty.” you note, before wiping at his brow. 
“hey,” he says, knowing that a blush has crept onto his cheeks, “stay on track here. where am i taking you tonight?” 
“your place.” you furrow your brow. “how many times do i have to say that?” 
“sorry! just making sure.” he says, shrugging before resuming the walk. it’s not too far off course, if there ever was a course to begin with. 
you settle back into place, head on his shoulder, and humming to yourself. oliver appreciates the music. 
“not gonna take my offer, eh?” you ask, breath tickling his neck. “she’s pretty, funny, but not as funny as me, remember that.” 
“i don’t think i’ve met her before, have i?” he asks, scanning his mind of recent memory. truth be told, he can’t recall you showing up with anyone that wasn’t a guy on the soccer team. 
“hm? you know everyone.” you counter. 
feigning innocence, he asks,“do i?” 
“maybe its because you’ve met soo many girls, you don’t remember her.” you retort and he winces inwardly at the disdain clear in your voice. 
“c’mon now,” he says, “i really don’t know that many.” 
you hum, “mm, i bet if i didn’t show up as often you wouldn’t remember me-” 
he’s quick to cut you off, “not true.” it’s too early to say he loves you, maybe infatuated is a better word. 
“if you say so,” you sigh, mind still buzzed and muddied. “are we there yet? i’m sleepy.” 
“just up the stairs,” he mutters, “feel free to fall asleep.” 
when the two of you arrive at the dorm, you’re fast asleep. he tries to move you onto the couch but you continue to cling, grumpy moans coming from you as he tries to pry you off. 
“you’ll kill me if you wake up in my bed,” he mutters, so he carries you off to sendou’s room. “here, it’s sen’s bed.” 
“don’t go, i need to cuddle with someone,” you mumble, words still slightly slurred, “til sen comes back at least.” 
he stills, knee sinking into the mattress, one hand on your back the other on the bed to steady himself. “you’re gonna kill me when you wake up.” he murmurs, but suddenly the perfume you’ve wearing smells really good. so does your hair and even the skin sticky with sweat is appealing. he wants to stay. 
“noo, i won’t,” you whisper, the scent of alcohol still heavy in your breath. “promise.” 
“…you want me to stay that badly?” he jokes, inwardly cursing at how easy you make him crumble. 
he swears his heart nearly stops when you giggle out a “yeah.” 
he settles in, maneuvering the two of you so that you’re laying on his chest. you fall back asleep quickly, nuzzling into him while your arm is splayed across him. 
it’s comfortable, he thinks, different from the other girls who get up and leave him after sex. not that he ever asks them to stay, actually preferring it when they leave. but he didn’t realize that someone could actually feel this good in his arms. 
“i think i’m actually falling in love,” he scoffs in disbelief, before throwing a palm up to his forehead, a grin plastered on his face. “goodnight, princess.” 
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he’s not surprised that you left before he woke up that morning. what’s actually surprising is how you seem to avoid him more lately afterwards. at least before you’d throw a few snarky remarks his way and listen to him talk for a bit before you’d inevitably wander back to your phone. 
it’s been about two weeks since that night and oliver’s got the message enough to leave you alone for most of the time you’re over. even when you come over for a movie night, he’ll try to keep his talks to you at a minimum. sometimes inviting over another teammate to fill up the awkward silences. 
even before the incident, he thought that maybe there’s a reason for it. a reason that he contemplates more one day as he watches you from the corner of his eye. there’s a reason why you’ll lay in sendou’s lap and not his, why you’ll hold hands with your other friends and not him, why they get meals while he gets scraps. 
he’s got it half right. there’s been too many texts from sendou asking how to get a crying girl out of his dorm, too often have there been “and that’s another one out the dorm,” calls. 
there’s a reason you keep him at arms length, why the most affection you’ll do is give him a quick hug. but he feels that you’re chipping down ever so slightly with each hang out, each party, and each “goodnight.” 
is that why tonight you don’t follow sendou to his room when he says goodnight? why you awkwardly fiddle with your hands, something he’s noticed you do when you’re nervous. he misses you and he feels a little more ambitious or perhaps insane for thinking that you might miss him too. 
he clears his throat, prompting you to peek at him from his side of the couch. “you goin’ to bed?” 
to his relief, you shake your head answering, “not yet, you?” 
“depends. you want company?” he asks, sliding over to where you’re sitting.
you giggle, something he hasn’t heard from his end in weeks, giving in to his little game. besides, no one else will text you back this late at night, “i don’t know, do i?” 
he grins, “i think so.” emboldened, he glides his hand underneath your blanket, before he presses his hand against your thigh. he waits a second to see if you’ll stop him, but you don’t.
his hand trails up until it’s dipping past the waistband of your shorts. he smirks when he feels the wet patch on your undies, “and here i thought you didn’t like me.” 
your breath hitches slightly, “what do you mean? i’m always nice to you.” 
“thats debatable.” he mumbles, slipping your panties aside to ghost his fingers up and down your slit. “especially lately, you don’t even wanna look at me.”as he’s about to sink a finger in, you jolt forward, grabbing his wrist. 
“wait!” you gasp, chest heaving. he stops, just like you ask, never having seen you so flustered before. 
“waiting.” he says, doing his best to not have his mind too muddied by the heaviness in his pants. 
“i don’t want to.. um, i don’t think we should fuck.” you stumble over your words, unable to take your eyes off his hand. 
he blinks, “okay.” he won’t push it. retreating, he tries to sit back, but you don’t remove the grip on his wrist. “uh, are you gonna-“ 
“we could… do other things though.” you mumble, but you release his hand and push it away anyway. “actually, nevermind.” 
he grins, finally getting it. “so you want me to finger you, is that it?” 
“do you have to put it that way?” you groan, laying back and covering your face with your hands. 
“finger fucking?” he jokes, but he’s slinking back forward, his hand traveling back to it’s rightful spot. 
you groan again, but not without spreading your legs for him and he smiles. 
“not gonna talk to me?” he continues, one thumb slowly stroking your cunt through the fabric of your panties. 
“do you want me to change my mind?” you answer, muffled by the sleeves of your hoodie. 
“please don’t,” he laughs, before tugging at your clothing. “can i?” 
you nod again and he’s quick to pull them off. it’s his turn to lose his breath, lost in how pretty your folds glisten for him. 
change of plans, he thinks as he levels himself down onto the bed. 
“oliver?” you call, peeking through your fingers again. 
“as long as we don’t fuck right?” he asks, licking his lips and you can read the anticipation clear on his face. but he’ll wait for you to say yes, like a dog on a leash.
you nod again, the both of your hearts hammering as you do and he dives in. he starts slow to savor it, his tongue moving with long languid strokes between your folds. 
he knew you’d taste good, but not this good. even better are the noises you make, well the ones you’re trying to hide. he glances up at you, your face contorted as you bite down on the sleeve of your jacket. a heavy blush creeps onto his face, you’re so pretty. 
you arch your back as he slides his tongue over your clit, bringing his fingers up to prod at your opening. he continues to work his tongue over your already swollen clit, suckling out mewls from your lips. when he sinks his fingers in, your jaw drops as you gasp out a “fuck!” 
covering your mouth again, you whimper as he picks up the pace. he wants to hear that pretty voice again, so he curls his digits up inside your gummy walls and to his delight, you sob out again. 
by now he’s realizing he actually has shit self control. pushing your clothing up, he pulls off your already swollen clit, readjusting himself as he starts to leave sloppy kisses up the expanse of your belly. 
“i wanna hear you, i wanna see you,” he mumbles, latching onto your neck and sucking in a mark. “besides, sendou’s asleep.” he actually has no clue if his best friend’s asleep, he’s just so high on you that he doesn’t care. 
“take me to your room then,” you whimper, conceding, breathless and squirming. he smiles against the crook of your neck before removing his fingers from your cunt. he picks you up fast, scooping you up as you tremble in his embrace. 
he practically sprints to his room, slamming the door shut before throwing you into his bed. you scramble to take the rest of your clothes off. he wanted to see, remember? 
you tug on his shirt, it’s only fair if you take your clothes off that he does too. “hey… take this off.” 
“i thought we weren’t fucking?” he laughs, but you raise a brow. 
“do we need to fuck if we’re naked?” you scoff, but in reality, you feel a bit too exposed. 
he grins, shrugging, “nah.” then he’s quick to take off his own before pushing you down. “let me finish eating, yeah?” 
you settle back, sighing out a breathless, “yeah.” 
with your legs spread so nicely, it’s easy for him to get back to work. he spreads your eager folds with his thumbs, admiring your pretty pussy before spitting down a lob of saliva. you jolt at the feeling, but he uses an arm to keep you still. he has work to do. his tongue begins lapping back at your folds before diving into your cunt, slurping at the arousal leaking onto his sheets. 
oliver’s not typically a giver, maybe having only given a couple times in all of hookups. but this was different, he could probably eat you out for hours if you could stay a twitching, mewling mess underneath. perhaps he was starving, growling as he pulls you in even closer and you find your hands in his hair. 
as his name leaves your lips like a chant, he continues to tongue fuck you, your slick trailing down his chin. your core burns as you grind onto him, chasing after your release, his stubble lightly scratching across your skin. 
he switches, latching back onto your clit with nimble fingers working their way inside you. “cum for me, baby.” he murmurs, curling his fingers up again just how you like it. “you’re so fucking good for me, you know that?” 
“s-shut up,” you sob, but the praise hits in all the right places as you arch your back. another indication that you like it is the harsher pull on his strands, a string of obscenities leaving your mouth.
“aw, i’m just tryna make you feel good,” he muses as he hears your first frustrated noise from pulling away. “close huh?” 
“oliver, please.” you whimper, brow furrowed as you gaze down at him. you’re so close, but just his fingers scissoring you isn’t enough. 
he tilts his head, “please what?” he asks, and you wonder when he got so fucking bold. “use your words.” maybe it’s the blood rushing straight to his head that’s got him out of sorts, but for the first time he’s got you where he wants you. he may be the one caged between your thighs, but you're the one that’s stuck in his web, begging for release. 
his fingers continuously moving in and out of you makes your eyelids flutter, especially when he picks up the pace. “i wanna cum, please,” you beg, “please, please, please.” 
he laughs out an “that wasn’t so hard right?”, before he’s back onto your bundle of nerves. he seeks out the friction of the bed for his own pleasure, his cock hard and heavy as he grinds out against the sheets.
right now though, the focus is on you. the focus is the way your thighs clench closer together, boxing him in, letting him know when what he does is good. it’s the way you greedily grind up into his face, tumbling his name off your lips like it’s the only thing you know how to say. 
you finally burst when oliver murmurs, “so fucking good for me,” his breath hot on your clit. he finger fucks you through your orgasm, continuously praising you, “good job, beautiful, that’s it.”
you pant, pushing at his hand when you’ve started to get overstimulated. he slips out, but pushes you back when you start to reach for his cock. you watch with doe eyes as he smears your slick across his cock, stroking himself. 
“keep your legs open.” he says, eyes lidded. “i won’t fuck you, don’t worry.” he reassures when he sees your eyes widen more. 
you comply, still slightly twitching from your orgasm, when he settles himself between your folds again. he’s not far off, not when he’s been drunk off the sound and taste of you. but the wetness between your folds has his head spinning. he slips so easily between them, he wishes he could just slide into you, but he’s good at keeping his promises.
he uses one hand to keep his cockhead pressed firmly against you. you think it’s messy, his hand covered in arousal, precum, and saliva but you’re both a little mesmerized by the scene. the two of you make eye contact and he breathes out, “you’re so beautiful.” 
“stop complimenting me,” you pout, before you’re pulling him down to rest his forehead against yours. “or else i’ll kill you.” 
“i thought you were gonna say you’d fall in love with me,” he muses, lips barely ghosting over yours as he continues to rut in between your folds. 
“in your dreams, oliver.” you murmur, but you tilt up and kiss him anyway. you taste yourself on him but can’t seem to care, as his tongue slips in to intertwine with yours. 
that’s enough to set him off, shuddering as he comes undone on your belly. white hot ropes paint your skin and you pull away, lips swollen. you fall back on the bed, the only sound the two of you panting. 
oliver lays down next to you, staring at the ceiling. he brings his hand up, staring at his sticky fingers covered in fluid. 
“gross,” you cringe and he peeks over at you. “clean me up?” 
“sure.” he’s quick to get up, grabbing a box of tissues by his bed. 
“all men are the same.” you groan, but there’s a smile dancing on your face. 
“yeah, this is the brand sendou and i prefer.” he jokes and you smack him playfully. he uses the tissues to clean his hand first before moving onto you, scooping up the remnants of what just happened. he pauses when he moves lower, looking at you. 
are we… anything? he wants to ask, but he bites his tongue when he notices you staring back. he cleans up the rest, before asking, “so, what now?” 
“i’m gonna shower, that’s what.” you say, pushing yourself up and grabbing your clothes. you don’t put them on, there’s no point since both the guys in this dorm have seen all of you. 
as you turn the knob to leave, he asks, “can i join you?”
you scoff, shooting him a look. “absolutely not.” 
he figured you’d say that. 
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it’s only 8pm on a saturday when sendou’s phone blows up. 
“sorry,” he says, reading the letters of your name across the screen. “i gotta take this.” 
it’s a rare night in, oliver’s own phone buzzing with “where are you?” texts from his friends. he hasn’t been able to stop thinking about you, the way you squirmed and moaned for him was enough to set him over. falling further into the sticky web of your hold. 
when sendou walks back in, the expression on his face is mixed with concern and confusion. 
“something happen?” oliver asks, pausing the movie. 
“uhh.. yeah i think so.” sendou answers, scratching the back of his neck. “i think y/n’s coming over.” 
there’s confusion washed over the brunette’s features. he’s not sure why this visit is so concerning, you’ve changed your mind before. saying no to movie night yet coming over unannounced anyway. 
sendou sighs, “don’t freak out when she gets here.” he’s not an idiot. he’s seen basically every spare glance that oliver’s thrown your way, the schedule modifications to come home more often to see you, the way his smile lingers on you when you do almost anything. he sees the way oliver deflates when you’re with someone else, it’s quick when it happens, almost uncatchable. 
“and why would i do that?” he’s joking, but the knot in his stomach is turning. what is it? you’re coming over to tell them all about your great fuckin’ date with rensuke? even after almost sleeping together, you still ran right back to kunigami when he called for you. 
sendou rolls his eyes, before repeating himself, “seriously. don’t.” 
oliver throws his arms up in surrender, “okay, okay.” 
when do you barge in you’re in the same hoodie you wore the night you came undone under oliver’s mouth. the nervous smile on his face falls when he hears you sniffling. when the two of you make eye contact, your puffy red-lines eyes looking into his, he feels something break. 
you blink, and then you blink again, as you try to fight back the tears that eagerly wish to spill. instinctively, you tug at the sleeves of your sweater trying to self-soothe yourself. you try to speak multiple times, only to stop and let out little huffs of air. it hurts too much. 
sendou speaks first, gently rubbing your back as he guides you over to the couch. “hey… take some deep breaths.” you shake your head, balling your hands into fists as you continue to cry. 
“want me to leave?” oliver asks, as much as he doesn’t want to, he knows you’re more comfortable when he’s not around. to both his and sendou’s surprise, you shake your head again, reaching out to him with trembling hands. 
he sits closer and you lean down to lay in his lap, “l-let me cry here.” you mumble, grabbing his hand and placing it on the top of your head. “rub my head.” 
oliver can’t help but laugh a little bit, “sure.” he nods over to sendou, whose eyes could possibly launch from their sockets. “hey, you heard her, rub her back.” 
“pretty sure she said ‘head’” he retorts, but starts doing it anyway. while sendou’s eyes wander the room, sometimes glancing at the remote wondering if he should start the movie back up; oliver’s are glued on you. 
he cards through your hair, eyes soft on your hiccuping form. he thinks you feel like his girlfriend, maybe if someone else saw, you’d look like it too. maybe he’ll ask sendou later. it’s a few more moments of your sniffling before you finally speak. 
“do you guys think i’m stupid?” you ask, reaching out for the remote and turning whatever movie they had playing on. 
“sometimes, yeah,” sendou answers and both you and oliver are quick to smack him. “ow! i thought you wanted the truth? and why the hell are you hitting me?!” he exclaims, one finger pointed towards the brunette. 
oliver shrugs, “because you said something stupid?” 
“i agree,” you sniffle, but there’s the smallest hint of a smile on your face. “you’re supposed to lie, idiot.” 
“if i lie will you tell us what happened?” he asks, leaning back against the armrest. 
“don’t even have to lie, i’ll just tell you.” you sigh, lowering the volume down on the tv. you start to tap on oliver’s knee since you’re nervous, but he continues to play with your hair. 
“so you know how rensuke and i were… thinking of being something?” you start. you feel oliver’s hand pause when you say that, but he starts back up again. “anyway, he called it off today. he gave me an ultimatum that i didn’t wanna take.” 
“which was?” sen asks, brow raised. 
“i couldn’t see you two anymore.” you answer, “like i wouldn’t choose my best friends?” 
“since when is oliver your best friend?” sendou asks, perplexed. 
since she came on my face in my bedroom, he muses, but you answer with a “since i decided.” 
“are you guys doing shit behind my back?” the redhead asks and the two of you look at each other. 
“no,” you say, face heating up as you stare into pretty dual tone eyes, “we don’t do anything.” 
not only is the blush on his face clearly visible, but so is the smirk. “not a thing,” he agrees. “if anything, we just… chill.” 
you mouth out an “oliver!” but he shrugs, before using his thumb to wipe at the remnants of tears on your cheek. if you weren’t trying to hide from the current accusations, you’d probably just keen up into his touch. 
“i don’t wanna know.” sendou groans, breaking the two of you out of trance. he gets up, turning the tv off and flickering his gaze towards you. “sleeping in my room tonight?” 
you swallow, before nodding again, finally tearing your gaze away from oliver. “yeah, i’ll be there in a sec.” 
you sit up as sendou leaves, the click of his door indicating when the two of you are alone. you feel vulnerable. you pull your knees up, hugging them, before you start to talk. 
“i really liked him, y’know?” you mumble, “but i never really got the same vibe back.” 
oliver’s silent, arms crossed and head thrown back as he stares up at the ceiling. he doesn’t particularly care to hear just how much you liked rensuke, but he’s not about to leave now. 
you continue, “i think he wanted someone to blow off steam with, which isn’t bad, but… i wanted him to actually like me. like-like me, not just to be thrown away later on. i thought he could be my first real boyfriend.” 
“why are you telling me this?” he asks, trying to keep his tone neutral. “wouldn’t you rather tell sen?” 
you shake your head, looking back at him slightly. “no, i like talking to you more. about this stuff anyway, you seem to actually listen to me. sen’s not bad, but i dunno, he doesn’t really give me sound advice.” 
“what’d he tell you to do last time?” he asks, semi-agreeing already that sendou really isn’t the best advice giver.
“sleep with karasu.” you deadpan, inwardly cringing at how awkward that interaction was. 
“and did you?” he asks, voice a little ptiched. 
“no! everyone thinks so, but no.” you failed, thankfully, unable to actually go through with it. but you made a friend with tabito, one that listens to your ramblings when you visit. 
oliver sits up a little and you snap your head back forward, embarrassment eating at you. “did you two… do anything?” he’s started to realize something. 
you shake your head again, hoping he doesn’t notice how feeble you feel. but he can’t notice that because he feels like he’s on cloud nine. “have you slept with anyone?” he asks, heart pounding. 
what comes up must always come down and to his dismay, you nod, mumbling out a name that leaves him slaw jacked. “sendou. like, twice…. why am i sharing this information with you?”
“seriously? sendou?” he’s not sure whether this means that his friendship has ended, but it does maybe make some sense that you’re so comfortable around him. beyond best friends, anyway. 
you spin around, “listen! it was when we had just graduated high school. we’d never slept with anyone before .. so, seriously, why am i telling you this?!” 
he won’t lie, the panicked look on your face is cute, so much so that he’s a little less pissed off. “okay, okay. i get it,” he says, placing a hand on your shoulder. “you don’t have to tell me anything else.” 
sometimes, you don’t understand how oliver can be so sweet, but you sure are grateful for it. you smile at him and his heart melts a little. it’s so much better when you aren’t crying. 
he pats your head before getting up. 
“oliver?” you call, but he smiles at you and it’s your turn to feel your heart flutter. 
“you should get some sleep,” he says, “it’s late. you want water before you go though?” padding over to the kitchen to fix you a glass of water. 
you nod, “mhm.” before getting up yourself and following after him. he hands you the glass and he thinks it’s strange. the first time you stood in this kitchen, you didn’t even look his way. but now, you look at him clearly. sure, it’s not the ideal situation and you are leaving to go sleep in another guy’s bed, but it’s enough. 
one step closer to you is worth it. it shouldn’t be long now, he thinks, you’ll be his in due time. but he doesn’t notice the confusion on your face when you grab the glass. the moment your fingers touch you feel it too, that all familiar pull, the one you were trying (and failing) to avoid. you duck away when you move towards sendou’s room, hoping he can’t hear the way your heart pounds within your chest.
it can’t be him.
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“that fucking stings!” oliver hisses, instinctively pulling away from you. 
you frown, “i don’t know why you went to me and not like, the campus nurse or a hospital.” you recenter his face, gripping his chin between your index finger and thumb. 
“why would i go there when i’ve got my guardian angel here?” he teases before wincing again as you press the cloth to his busted lip. 
“i’ve got to stop the bleeding,” you mumble, ignoring his comment. oliver thinks you look so cute when concern paints your face, he’d kiss you if you let him, despite his lip. “i still can’t believe you did that.” 
“did what?” he asks.
“get your ass beat,” you snort, removing the pressure from his lip before handing him an ice pack. “here.” 
“he made you cry, like i wasn’t gonna beat his ass?” he counters, correcting you and if he could pout, he would. 
“oliver. that was weeks ago, no one asked you to do something so stupid,” you sigh, swiveling around to look for bandages. “there was no point.”
“no one asked you to date stupid guys,” he retorts, but man does it hurt. more than his lip or his bruised cheek, the fact that no matter what you won’t look at him the same way you do others. 
“i just don’t get why you’d do something so dumb.” you say, closing the medicine cabinet while holding a box of band aids. you’re so nonchalant about it it’s infuriating. why don’t you get it? 
he blinks, before scoffing, “what am i to you?” 
“you’re… oliver.” you say, tensing, suddenly not liking the direction this conversation is going. 
“that’s it?” he almost can’t believe it, that after everything, he’s just still oliver. 
“what do you want me to say?” you sigh, voice coming out a little irritated. you’ve never done well with confrontation, especially not when it comes to feelings like this. 
he sets the ice pack down before continuing, “that i’m important to you, more than just some dude you string along for fun.” 
“what are you even talking about?” you exasperate, because really, what does he want? he knows you two aren’t anything, nothing more than friends and yet he tries so hard. so hard it makes your head spin, so hard it makes you sometimes doubt your own judgment on him. but you refuse, you’ll continue to listen to that little voice that tells you: no. not him. 
“for fucks sake, can’t you pick me just one time?!” he yells, slamming his hand on the counter and you jump back, “not karasu, not sendou, not fucking kunigami. don’t run to them. run to me. can’t it be me?” 
“y-you’re crying,” you deflect, trying to look anywhere but him because if you look at him, you’ll want to hold him. you’ll want to give him, tell him that maybe you two could try to be something. you don’t even argue that kunigami isn’t an option anymore. 
“i don’t fucking care.” 
“and i don’t know what to say.” you answer, eyes glued on the box in your hands. 
“just say the word and i’ll be yours. fully and wholly, i’ll give you everything.” he says firmly. 
but you stay quiet, awkwardly fidgeting with the box in your hands. 
“…please?” it comes out soft, whispery, and most of all desperate. a plea that comes from deep within because at the end of it all, he loves you. 
but there’s nothing from you, it’s radio silence. it’s the quietness after midnight on a tuesday when the rest of campus is deep asleep. it’s nothing. and for a brief moment, he’ll accept it, because it’s harder for him to sit in this continued rejection. he’ll accept that right now, you don’t want him. 
he gets up, pushing past you not even bothering to wipe the tears that trail down his cheeks. and he thinks, maybe even a small bit of him prays, that you’ll stop him. 
but you don’t, staring at the tiled floor as he leaves, and oliver feels his heart shatter into tiny glass pieces. should he still hold onto “maybe”? maybe someday you’ll want him too? maybe someday you’ll be his exclusively? or should he give up, call it a day, and speed dial one of the girls in his phone?
he doesn’t know.
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luvvannie · 5 months
Text
!? --- YOUR HUSBAND, FYODOR DOSTOEVSKY
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>> husband!fyodor x fem!reader (one use of 'princess,' and 'milaya,' but other than that, pretty gn!)
syn. a compilation of husband fyo headcannons :)
gen. fluffier than his hat
care.
i see a lot of people making him out to be so confident and MPH and although i am not here to undermine that thought (bc i am also horrendously in love w/ that possibility), i simply bring to the table SHY FYO !!!
like like like :(((((( him expressing his care for in like the most subtle ways,, like memorising your nap schedule and working around it for dates and outings AAAHH
and then ud be like 'but fyo isn't that time difficult for u??' and he'd respond 'but thats an hour after the time u wake up from ur nap in the evening so ull have enough time to get ready and pick ur outfit and do ur hair and ur makeup' AND THEN ULL BE LIKE 'AWWW FYOOOOO' and then he'll be so confused bc to him it's like how was that cute i was just being practical 🧍‍♂️
going off of the whole memorising things about you... i feel like he would just have your orders for whatever place written off on a little sticky note in the back of his mind... like he NAILS ur order without so much as a confirmation from you... it's like watching a well-oiled machine run tbh, 'one ___ but without the ___ and extra ___ and also a ___ in a meal with a ___. thank you." LIKE WOW!!! THATS UR MAN!!!
physical affection.
okay listen... still going with shy fyo but steering a little away because AFFECTIONATE FYO???? FYO WHO WILL RANDOMLY GRAB YOUR HAND OUT OF NOWHERE AND STROKE HIS THUMB OVER YOUR KNUCKLES, BEFORE TAKING YOUR HAND TO HIS LIPS AND KISSING EACH FINGER??? FYO WHO WILL WALK INTO THE ROOM, KISS YOUR TEMPLE AND TELL YOU HE LOVES YOU WHILE YOURE JUST MINDING YOUR OWN BUSINESS AND THEN WALK BACK OUT LIKE HIS BUSINESS WAS FINISHED???? FYO WHO WILL WALK UP BEHIND YOU WHILE YOU'RE COOKING OR DOING CHORES AND JUST BACKHUG YOU AND STAY LIKE THAT FOR THE NEXT HUNDRED BEATS???????? AAAAAAAAAAAAAAHHH
i think it definitely wldve taken a while for him to adjust tho. just imagining him at the very start of ur relationship when u both were just silly little college students and you would put your arms around him for a hug and he would just STIFFEN COMPLETELY and not know how to respond... BUT HE GOT THERE IN THE END OKAY!!
i think i may go as far as to argue that he will be the one initiating most of it now... although that's not to say you don't do any of it, because you most definitely do.
i think his favourite is your hugs :(( although i don't think he would ever say that outloud..
householding.
he doesn't like it when you do chores. like he REALLY REALLY doesn't like it...
when you first started living together (before marriage), and he would find you washing dishes, he would just silently come beside you and bump you out of the way and take over without a word LMAOOO
he has gotten more used to it however,, considering the fact that he, unfortunately for him, cannot princess you for every waking hour... he still doesn't love it though. he would much rather you sit there and look pretty and not raise a fingertip.
cooking is an exception though, because he likes doing it with you :((
BUT NO KNIVES AND ESPECIALLY NO CHEESE GRATERS AFTER THAT ONE TIME YOU ACCIDENTALLY CUT YOUR FINGER GRATING A CARROT...
you get to do the fun stuff though, like measuring the ingredients and mixing them all together. i really don't think he's that vocal though, he'll just kinda do him part and then nudge the bowl towards you silently like 'its ur turn do ur thing'
he loves that you're talking your ass of the entire time, something about it feels so endearing to him... the whole time he'll just be giving you small, half-sentences like...
'FYOOOO THE BATTER IS ON MY SHIRTTTTTT!!!'
'that's why i tried to roll up your sleeves earlier, darling...'
'ITS GOING TO STAIN!!!!!!!!!!'
'just... we can just wash it off...'
'HOW COULD YOU DO THIS TO MEEEEE!?!?!?!?!'
'uhm... you have something on the-'
'AAAAAAAAA ITS ON THE FRONT'
'i told you to wear an apron...'
healing.
when you're sick, he's gone complete caretaker mode... he will NOT allow you to get up from your resting space (whether it be the bed, or the sofa), NO MATTER WHAT THE CIRCUMSTANCES.
he'll cook you very good meals!! making sure they're healthy for you and also extremely tasty so that he can try to coax you back into your appetite and get you the nutrients you need to get better :(( carries you your meals on a little lap desk, and will spoon-feed you each bite until you've had enough, AND ONLY UNTIL YOU'VE HAD ENOUGH!
he's just overall very gentle with you :((
you've lost your appetite and can't have anymore than half of the portion he cooked for you?? 'it's alright love, i'll save it for later.'
your blocked nose is keeping you up and you haven't been able to sleep the entire night because of it?? 'oh, milaya, why didn't you tell me sooner?' before he gets you some nose drops and then rocks you to sleep in his arms.
you're sad because you can't go out for date night like the two of you planned for anymore?? THAT DOESN'T MEAN YOU CAN'T HAVE A GOOD NIGHT IN EACH OTHER'S COMPANY!! ITS GO FISH TIME!!!! (yes he will use his expensive playing cards to play go fish with you just to make you feel better he's THAT devoted)
de-stressing.
those nights when you're both stressed and tired and overstimulated out of your minds are strangely enough, your favourite nights, because you know that you'll be able to come home to your loving husband and disappear into his warmth...
you get home a little earlier than he does, so you take the opportunity to warm the bed, as you wait for him to arrive with your mandatory de-stress-cuddles, and before you know it, you're drifting off...
until you're awoken again by the feel of the warm covers gliding against your skin, and the mattress shifting slightly beneath you, opening your eyes to see ITS YOUR PACKAGE!!! ITS HERE!!!!!
you both don't waste any time and practically envelope each other with warmth take a few moments to situate yourselves, mumbling a few croaky 'i love you's before completely falling asleep.
you'll pay for sleeping in your uncomfortable work clothes when the two of you wake up again around three in the morning and decide to FINALLY shower... and then go back to bed.
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a/n. hehe first post on this acc yayayay!! hope these were good :)) i'm so inlove with him oh my lord... N E WAYS REBLOGS ARE APPRECIATED !!!
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charmedreincarnation · 9 months
Note
I’m kind of in a similar situation to your college indecisiveness post bc I want to shift but never have the time cuz all this studying. I’m really hating life rn. I’ve tried shifting a few times and managed to detach my awareness from this reality for a few minutes at a time, so i know what works for me, but I never have time to do it. I feel kind of drained that I could be achieving so much but I’m stuck not even having the time cuz I’m not smart enough to get done with all this HW fast enough
TLDR how do I be cool like you and too smart for school to be a big concern? Do I just say f**k it and do a shifting attempt when I’m supposed to be studying?
This was such a sweet ask 😭😭💖 I'm overwhelmed by the sweetness of your words, and I assure you, I'm far from being as cool as you think. In fact, I found myself facing the very same dilemma in the past! Now, I'm not sure if you're looking for some wisdom from Loa or valuable studying tips, so ill share a little bit of both? Also college-related questions/asks have been pouring in lately, so I've decided to address them all right here. I should probably just make it a post but I’ll use this ask as a reference.
Pre law perspective:
So my senior year, was when I really started my journey. It was during this time that I learned about shifting and manifesting (kind of law of attraction) so I naturally attempted everyday and had my focus to that. However, I basically spiraled into burnout and indifference towards school. Tbh It's still a mystery to me how I managed to do fine in school when I basically stopped attending classes mentally and barely did my work.
I've always had ADHD, anxiety, and procrastination issues throughout my high school years, But senior year took it to a whole new level. The boredom and disconnection from my studies were unbearable. I went through the motions, completing my homework, but for classes I didn't enjoy, I mindlessly attended without caring or understanding the material. It was a year filled with academic mediocrity, and certain subjects like AP Calculus and AP Biology, which I didn't even need for my future plans, were absolute torture.
And at the time I didn’t even fully understand what shifting was, But I clung to the notion that school no longer mattered in the grand scheme of things. Looking back, I realize it was a detrimental mentality to have for my well being. If there's one piece of advice I can offer, it's this - find a balance. Avoid burning yourself out completely, but don't neglect your mental well-being either. You are still here, whether you're shifting or not, whether you’re god or not, and whether you're actively manifesting or not. Diving deeper into a negative mental well will not benefit you in any way. Trust me, I learned this the hard way.
As my burnout intensified, I reached a point where I no longer wanted to be alive in this boring ass reality. It became so severe that I almost didn't apply to college. My entire focus was consumed by shifting, and I simply didn't care about anything else. It was my friends who came to my rescue, pushing me to apply and offering unwavering support. Without their guidance and nurturing, I honestly don't know where I would be today.
Eventually, I grew tired of being tired. I began diving into my subliminal journey, creating playlists that combined affirmations for school,success, and luck. I learned the importance of dividing my time wisely. During the second semester, I continued this approach, focusing on school-related practices during the day and dedicating my evenings to shifting attempts.
Affirmations and scripting became the root of my routine too. Miraculously, my grades improved, even when I skipped classes for an entire month or neglected to read the lectures.
I was able to graduate high school with honors, which in itself proves that success or whatever isn’t even just about being naturally "good at school." I worked smarter, not harder and knowing about manifesting really helped with that!
So I really advice you to find a balance in your journey. Don't pour all your energy into just school or just manifesting. Embrace the plethora of easy methods available - scripting, subliminals, binaural beats - and integrate them into your study routine. Make it work in your favor. Treat shifting like a cherished hobby, something that complements your academic pursuits rather than overshadowing them.
Also, set realistic standards for yourself. In high school, I used to obsess over achieving straight A's, disregarding any grade below perfection. Looking back, I realize how misplaced my priorities were. As long as you maintain a mix of A's, B's, and even a few C's, you'll be absolutely fine. Set a goal of achieving a GPA of 3.0 or whatever scale your institution uses, and celebrate every success along the way.
Loa perspective
Ok, now let's talk about the power of the Law of Assumption!
Now that I'm in a place where I give only about 20% of my time and effort to school and still do very well, I can help and reflect on my journey properly. Back in high school, like said I struggled with anxiety and ADHD, and I thought these challenges would hold me back.
Test-taking, deadlines, remembering information it all seemed overwhelming. But you know what helped me? Subliminals.
Listening to subliminals for intelligence and confidence made a significant difference in my life. They boosted my abilities and gave me the belief that I could excel academically. And that belief was everything.
As you probably know the Law of Assumption states that whatever we expect and assume to be true will become our reality. So, I decided to apply this principle to my studies. I assumed that I was capable of achieving great grades with ease. I assumed that school life would be manageable, and I would continuously improve my skills throughout the semester. I always visualized seeing As, revised my past grades, teacher giving me the grade I know I deserve no matter what.
And guess what? It worked! My mindset shifted towards greater productivity, and I started using my time more efficiently. As a result, my grades improved, and I had more time to focus on the things I genuinely enjoyed. It was a game-changer, and it accounted for about 70% of my success. Just imagine that - simply switching my mindset and accepting the positive results from my previous subliminal experiences.
I understand that college can be more stressful and demanding than high school. But it's still the same principle at play. You don't have to drastically change your study habits if you don't want to. Instead, use general resources during the day to aid your studying. And while you're at it, listen to subliminals that align with your goals. Instead of imagining and affirming to yourself that you're a failure and worrying about all the things that could go wrong, shift your focus. Imagine the grade you want, affirm and visualize that no matter what happens on your test, you'll still pass the class with flying colors. Remember, it's just one test, one assignment, and there are so many more opportunities ahead.
General school tips
* Stop checking your grades every day. Seriously, it's only stressing you out. Grades can fluctuate randomly, especially in college (and honestly, even in high school). Instead of obsessing over the numbers, focus on staying on top of your assignments. Keep up with your work, put in your best effort, and trust that alone will reflect in your grades.
* Say no to all-nighters. Trust me, reading the same material for 12 hours straight won't magically make you understand it. If something isn't clicking, it's probably an internal issue. There's no need to spend an entire night alone trying to grasp a single concept. Look for alternative resources like recap lessons on YouTube or seek help from a tutor or classmate. Remember, it's okay to acknowledge what doesn't come naturally to you and instead focus on your strengths.
* Realistically, doing your homework and attending class means you're probably not failing. Even if you're not getting the grade you want, it doesn't mean you're headed for failure. Those big tests that carry a significant weight in your grade may impact your GPA, but they don't define the trajectory of your life. Take a moment to reflect on all the times you thought a single grade would ruin everything, yet here you are, still alive and thriving. You've been through challenges before, and you're stronger than you think. Breathe, remind yourself that you're not alone in these thoughts and stresses, and keep pushing forward.
* Make friends and join class group chats. Trust me, these connections are gold. Joining group chats on platforms like GroupMe or Snapchat allows you to ask questions, collaborate on study guides, and realize that you're not alone in this journey. Even if they're not your closest friends, having a support system within your classes can make all the difference.
* Use EFT tapping for anxiety, especially before tests. Emotional Freedom Technique (EFT) tapping is not only useful for Law purposes, but it can also work wonders for managing anxiety. Check out my pinned guide on how to use EFT tapping. It has personally helped me immensely, and I hope it does the same for you.
* Work smarter, not harder. The truth is, those who seem to breeze through school while partying every night still manage to graduate and pass just like everyone else. The key is finding shortcuts, utilizing the vast resources available on the internet, and working smarter, not harder. Embrace technology, explore online study tools, and leverage the power of the internet as your greatest friend in this journey.
Here are some free recourses:
Math and Science
1. MathMagic Lite: This app lets you write any mathematical expressions and various scientific symbols easily
2. Equatio: A powerful equation editor that makes it easy to create digital, accessible maths
3. Microsoft Mathematics: Can be used to write mathematical expressions, solve equations, and plot graphs
4. Desmos Scientific Calculator & Graphing Calculator: Utility apps for students and teachers for calculations and graph plotting
5. WolframAlpha: A computational search engine that can solve a wide variety of problems, especially useful for math and science
Article/Video Summarization
6. Smmry: A website that summarizes articles for you
7. TLDR This: A browser extension for quick article summarization
8. Inshorts: An app providing news in 60 words or less
9. Listenable: Converts articles into short audio files
Note-Taking
10. Evernote: A note-taking app where you can jot down thoughts, save things you find online, and even scan physical documents with your phone's camera
11. Microsoft OneNote: Allows for free-form information gathering and multi-user collaboration
12. Notion: An all-in-one workspace where you can write, plan, collaborate, and get organized
Concept Explanation
13. Khan Academy: Offers practice exercises, instructional videos, and a personalized learning dashboard that empower learners to study at their own pace in and outside of the classroom
14. Coursera: Provides universal access to the world’s best education, partnering with top universities and organizations to offer courses online
15. Complexly: A YouTube channel that produces a variety of educational content, including the series Crash Course which covers many different subjects in depth
16. citation machine: you never have to make source citations by yourself. This gives your both in test and citations for your essays and research.
Lastly I’m gonna put all the free resources most colleges offer for free!
Academic Resources
* Online Study Platforms: Websites such as Khan Academy, Coursera, and edX offer free or low-cost courses on a variety of subjects that can supplement your coursework.
* Academic Advising Centers: Most colleges have an academic advising center where students can get guidance on course selection, degree requirements, and academic planning.
* Writing Centers: Writing centers provide assistance with writing assignments, including proofreading, editing, and helping with citations.
* Library Research Databases: Your college library likely subscribes to a number of research databases (like JSTOR, EBSCO, and ProQuest) that can provide access to academic journals, books, and other resources.
2. Career Resources
* Career Centers: These centers offer career counseling, resume reviews, interview preparation, and job search assistance.
* Internship and Co-op Programs: Many colleges have programs that help students find internships or co-op positions in their field of interest.
* LinkedIn Learning: This platform offers courses on a variety of career-related topics, including networking, resume writing, and job interviewing.
3. Mental Health and Wellness Resources
* Counseling Centers: Most colleges offer free or low-cost mental health services to students, including individual therapy, group sessions, and workshops.
* Fitness Centers: Regular exercise is important for both physical and mental health. Most colleges have fitness centers that offer a variety of workout options.
* Mindfulness and Meditation Apps: Apps like Headspace and Calm offer guided meditations that can help reduce stress and improve mental health.
4. Financial Aid Resources
* Financial Aid Office: Your college's financial aid office can provide information on scholarships, grants, work-study opportunities, and student loans.
* FAFSA: The Free Application for Federal Student Aid (FAFSA) is the key to accessing federal financial aid, including grants, work-https://www.tumblr.com/charmedreincarnation/712878654521262080/everything-eft-tapping?source=share funds, and loans.
* Scholarship Search Engines: Websites like Fastweb and Scholarships.com can help you find scholarships that you may be eligible for.
Other questions I got
Q: How did you manifest graduating early?
A: Graduating early was always a desire deep within me. I didn't realize it was on track to manifest until I had a meeting with my advisor. Interestingly, when I found out it was happening, I wasn't as ecstatic as I thought I would be. It made me realize that desires can change as we grow and evolve. So, if something you once desired doesn't bring you the same joy anymore, it's perfectly okay. Life is all about evolving and embracing new desires.
Q: What affirmations do you use?
A: Since I had a multitude of desires in various aspects of my life, I found it tiring to have a separate affirmation for each one. So, I opted for general affirmations that encompassed all areas of my life. For example, I would affirm statements like "I am the luckiest person alive," "Everything works out my way," and "I always get my desires." These affirmations can be applied to all aspects of life, including school. The key is to find affirmations that resonate with you and create a positive mindset.
Q: How do you manage the law/shifting and school?
A: As I mentioned earlier, integration is the key! You don't have to view manifestation or shifting as something separate from your school life. Instead, incorporate these practices seamlessly into your daily routine. The goal is to make it a part of your lifestyle without feeling like it's an extra burden or sacrifice. For example, if a certain method, like wbtb lucid dreaming, is disrupting your sleep schedule, consider switching to other methods like subliminals or reality checks. You can still set intentions before going to bed, which will be effective without compromising your sleep. Find what works best for you and strike a balance between school, manifestation, and your mental health
Q: What to do if affirmations don’t work:
A:maybe you don’t think with words. I’m more of a visual person and will always believe and like images more than words. I would just imagine my grades always being an A. No matter what, no matter if I failed a test or forgot to submit a homework even if I failed everything I still got an A! If you don’t like to visualize then change your wording to how you naturally speak. Maybe you don’t even like affirmations, it’s really different for everyone.
Q:I don’t want to go to this college but I still have to apply, is that affecting living in the end:
A: nope I don’t think taking action or not taking action affects anything If you’re living in the end. Just because you apply doesn’t mean you’ll get in simply because you took the action. Do what you have to do it doesn’t matter if you’re living your 3D life but know imagination is your true reality. If you’re a billionaire and sleep in a homeless shelter that doesn’t take away from the fact you’re a billionaire. Who knows why you’re at a homeless shelter and who knows why you’re applying for college. It doesn’t dictate anything.
Q:I needed to get into the void before college but now I’m here without my dream life and I hate it. What do I do:
A: well it’s happened so take a deep breath. You can still master the void, in fact you already have you’re just being silly and want a funny humbling story. There is no better time than now to be delulu. When you’re trying to escape something and it passes accept it and make it your bitch tbh. honestly keeping busy definitely helped me in my journey anyways, but I did provide tips above so you have free time because you shouldn’t just be immersed in school. For example when I was poor, it was because I needed a humbling back story because no one likes people born into wealth. I’m assuming you still want to be in college, and yea, it’s just cool to have started from the bottom before you become that It girl. That’s your choice and your truth but now you’re done with being humble so go tap into the void.
Q: what’s your perspective on manifesting a perfect life. like nothing bad ever happens but also having a good life with just minor challenges (nothing too big) and I don’t wanna normalize suffering bc who wants to suffer?
A: ok this had a school ask but that was just the gist of it. anyways not that my opinion matters first and foremost. But I think that’s great. Who wants to suffer… exactly. You know I like being human, but I did not like my human experience before Loa. I do like challenges, I like growth, I like not being perfect, and I like being happy and getting what I want too! you can still have all those human aspects and manifest everything you desire. Mary Sues do don’t exist because humanity exists. Don’t worry about it. Your life won’t feel stagnant or unreal or something, I promise
Ok sorry this came out longer than I expected but I had a lot to say. I hope that answers all the asks I’ve been getting ! You all got this, college, your manifesting journey, your anxiety, all of it. All of your dreams & desires are within your reach (right in front of you !!!) so go for it and still live your best life <3!
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lunas-side-anime-blog · 5 months
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aot veteran/104 corp icks bc im back on my bullshit
someone requested AOT veteran icks, they didn't specify nsfw or not so I did both and also added sasha connie and jean bc i luv them:) feel free to message/inbox with requests!
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(levi, erwin, hange, jean, sasha and connie)
Levi
will visit ur place and organize things without you asking. he'd just be like "ur welcome, now your kitchen makes sense" and ur like sir, I don't know where anything is now??? also he'd def the type to proclaim he's better than you for only getting two hours of sleep when you got four. honestly so many icks come to mind for this one, imma limit it to those two for now (stay tuned lol)
nsfw: tries to be rough with you but forgets his own strength. will try to throw you on the bed, but he does it too hard so you completely miss the bed and fall on the other side of it and he's just standing there like "🧍🏻...my bad."
Erwin
you cannot convince me this man doesn't wear water shoes at the pool. you guys say you want a dilf until you actually get one bc this is the type of shit it entails^^
nsfw: erwin cannot dirty talk for shit. im srry but if you're a lil kinky this isn't the man for you. try to call him daddy and he'd be like "we don't have kids?" and you explain the kink to him and he'd just say, "have you considered therapy?🤨" now he's concerned, boner gone, you feel called out, just go to sleep tbh
Hange
they're def a firm believer in natural deodorant and won't take the graceful hints that it's not working. prob wouldn't chill w them on a hot day is all i'm saying
nsfw: feel like they'd be really good in bed tbh like i'm struggling to think of an ick. hange has big dick energy, weirdos just do it better idk. i think maybe hange would try to spit in your mouth (they a freak) and they have so much and its thick and globby like the back of the throat type spit, your gonna choke bro im gagging as a i type-
Jean
bring back toxic masculinity because Jean's hair care routine is so good to the point he'll call out your split ends, i just know it
nsfw: a fucking chatterbox like his homies know everything. you've walked in on him telling connie in extreme detail how he had you in a full nelson last night while you screamed bloody murder and he doesn't see why ur mad. "babe, if anything i'm bragging about you 😏" fucking idiot istg. also kinda gross but I think he's the type to keep sniffing his fingers after fingering you like well into the next day EWW
Sasha
obvi she can't share for shit so I think she'd be an annoying person to eat out with. like yk when you're with your friends and only one person puts their card down so the rest can Venmo them? I think you can ask her to Venmo 20 and she'd send 15 and say something like "oh I didn't eat as many fries" but she fr did. never puts her card down either so believe it or not? jail.
nsfw: will literally be on her phone mid-sex with you. feel like she'd be really into the subway surfer vids and yeah, you go down on her and look up and she brought her own entertainment? ipad child behavior
Connie
i think he'd say "we" when talking about his fave sports team as if he contributed. like, "really connie, you helped win the superbowl? did you score a touchdown?" grow tf up
nsfw: insane bush on this one, i feel like he doesn't groom for shit and whatever, that's your choice! but I also feel like college-aged modern connie would talk shit about women who weren't bald down there and won't eat it unless it is. HYPOCRITE!! I think when he gets to his mid-twenties tho he'd mature (sasha beat his ass)
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lowkeyrobin · 4 months
Note
Jock!reader who's like really nice to everyone and has a crush on Ethan and tries to flirt with him while Ethan is tutoring him and FAILS MISERABLY and Ethan just thinks it the most adorable thing ever ahhhh plss🙏
- ♣️
YES YES YES HELLO ♣️ ANON!!! welcome my third child 🙏🙏🙏🙏 literallt love u sm thank you for this pookie
ETHAN MORGAN ; flirty jock and flustered geek
summary ; jock!reader who has a crush on ethan and fails successfully to flirt with him
warnings ; language, cheesey stuff lol, reader is described as a basketball player but can totally be changed, this also isn't that great tbh
word count ; 1k
masterlist
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You rest your letterman jacket on the back of the chair you sit on, being greeted by Ethan. He opens his binder to the homework in the Geometry packet, and you do the same, mentally preparing yourself. You notice his white binder is covered in stickers and some reference to vampires, witches, the supernatural, and beyond. Ethan was kind of your friend, you were more than acquaintances but you didn't talk outside of Geometry and English class.
You were one of the very few nice people on the basketball team, or maybe you were just a decent person and didn't judge people all too quickly. Otherwise, you didn't mind needing the tutoring from Ethan, you appreciated it really, if you failed another test you could be at risk for getting kicked off the team and you might lose the opportunity for a scholarship to college.
"Okay, so, what exactly do you need help with?" The brunette asks, looking up at you as he runs a hand through his hair, looking a little nervous.
"I just don't know how to like, figure out what shape they are like, how Mr. D wants us to, and like how to find the second base or the height" You explain, "Like, I know how I just can't remember the like, equations, I guess. And when I do, I get the math wrong"
He nods, "Okay, so, you know how to find the areas and perimeters well enough, though, right?"
You nod.
As he begins to explain how to solve your problems, you notice his orange t-shirt, accentuating the perfectly placed blush on his cheeks, faint but definitely pink. The way he spoke to dumb it down for you a bit but to not infantilize you made you smile a bit, seeing as he cared about your feelings. You notice him rub the nape of his neck, seemingly anxious or nervous around you, or maybe uncomfortable because he didn't know how to teach, like how Mr. D should be teaching you this and not poor Ethan, wasting his study hall for you.
You were already very, very aware of your crush on Ethan Morgan. He was your every thought, he was in your blood, in your ears, in your eyes, and in your tears. (weezer reference)
But, now was not the time to dilly dally about with high school crushes, these next 35 minutes could potentially determine your entire future. You needed this free ride to college, otherwise you'd turn into another old person working a job that pays minimum wage for maximum effort.
As time lugged on, you couldn't help but not focus on your homework and instead focus on Ethan and his gorgeous face. He looks back up at you after asking a question, seeing you were totally zoned out staring at him.
"Y/n?" He waves a hand in front of your eyes, trying to snap you back to reality. (eminem reference, wow I'm on a roll today)
You blink, "Oh, shit, sorry, uh, what'd you say, pretty boy?"
You couldn't even think about the words spilling out of your mouth until after they already fell. Those words hit Ethan like a falling anvil, his face turning bright red as he tries to shrug it off as you were just surprised and trying to be nice to him.
"Uh, this is the equation, uhm, try solving it"
You awkwardly nod, writing down the equation and putting in the numbers with the respective variables. You solve the equation, ending up with 24 for the height. He looks confused, having got a different answer. He scooches over to you, trying to figure out where you went wrong.
"Y'know, you're like a walking calculator. A cute one though" You shrug, he looks at you with a slightly confused and amused face, "I dunno what that even means, sorry"
He nods, "Oh, okay, you I think multiplied by two instead of dividing"
"Oh, whoops" You pick your pencil back up, fixing your mistake.
"There you go!" Ethan smiles, "It's just little mistakes, you'll build on it" He lightly pats your shoulder.
"Did you know Ancient Romans used to brush their teeth with their urine? And it actually worked?" You randomly ask him, fidgeting with your pencil.
Ethan blinks, slightly confused before he lightly laughs. "I hate you, focus on the Geometry, no stalling"
"Do you hate me or are we about to kiss right now?"
"Dude. Did you get that off Pinterest or something?"
"...Yeah"
He hides a laugh and bites his lip, "Okay so you-"
"Damn, are you Terms and Conditions? Cause I'd love to blindly agree to whatever you say"
Ethan quickly covers his mouth, "Shut up!"
You laugh a bit, "Sorry, sorry. I didn't sleep for shit last night and I'm getting frustrated cause I don't understand this"
"You'll learn!" Ethan smiles, shaking you lightly by the shoulders.
Some time later, the bell is about to ring, dismissing you to lunch.
"Thanks Eth" You lightly smile, "Oh, uh-" You reach into your backpack, pulling out some homemade cookies in a plastic Tupperware, handing them to him. "These are for you. I have to go to lunch in a second" You say, pulling your backpack over your shoulders, carrying your binder and pencil in hand.
"Oh- thank you!" He smiles, watching you stand up. The smile falters a bit due to awkwardness, "Uh- I have lunch next period too-"
"Bye Ethan, see you later! Love you, dude!"
Ethan is left confused and slightly shocked, cheeks a little red.
He knew you had a crush on him, he felt the same way, but he loved seeing you miserably fail to flirt with him. You were no romantic, if anything, a hopeless romantic in your thoughts.
He smiles, looking down at the red-lid Tupperware, seeing soft, chocolate chip cookies inside, his favorite.
"Thanks, Y/n," He whispers with a little smile, then gathers up his binder and books, shoving them in his backpack.
He notices a tingling feeling in his face, feeling a familiar warmth on his face as he thought about the nicknames and dumb pickup lines you'd spilled out of your lips that past half hour. God, would he love to kiss those lips of yours. He sighs, realizing he should definitely let you do that some more before he asks about it at all.
Thankfully, he'd been able to have slipped a note into your binder before you left.
"Hey Y/n! If you need any help tomorrow I'll be in the library. Bring your pickup lines with you, and I might help you not get kicked off the team. -Ethan"
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illubean · 4 months
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Valorant Protocol as Highschool Stereotypes
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Characters: Chamber, Gekko, Iso, Jett, Killjoy, Neon, Phoenix, Raze, Sage, Skye, Viper, Yoru Type: Headcanons
HAHA help me valorant brainrot >.< also this is based off of my hs experience soooo yeah
Warnings: none
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Chamber
your typical pretty boy
all the girls love him all the boys hate him
well...most of the girls love him
they follow him around to classes or offer him gifts or ask to sit with him at lunch etc.
and he eats up the attention every time
he's lab partners with Viper in Environmental Sciences and he likes trying to flirt with her
she actually hates him btw
Gekko
canonically he skateboards
but honestly? I can see him being on the dance team
he's so high energy, he needs some sort of outlet
he never misses an opportunity to show off his dance moves
homecoming? prom? he is the center of the dance circle
like Raze, he doesn't know how popular he is
he's just happy to have so many good friends that it doesn't even actually occur to him that he's considered "popular"
Iso
he's an ap art kid
like he walks around with a big ass sketchbook every day
always talking about his portfolio
Iso baby ily but please shut the fuck up about oil paints <3
he probably volunteered part of his summer break to come in and paint a mural for the school
I think he'd also take a piano class as like a schedule filler but he actually gets crazy good at it
Jett
pe tryhard
if you end up on the opposite team as her while playing dodge ball good luck 😓
she's always picked as team captain because literally no one else is excited as she is
she's sorta like Hairo from Saiki K 💀
she gets a lil mad when her teammates don't try
Killjoy
she's in robotics club
she's not very popular but that doesn't bother her at all
she heads straight to and from every class and spends her lunch period in the workshop unless Raze drags her off somewhere
not a lot of people actually know who she is, and if they do they just know her as 'Raze's Friend'
i think she'd remind the teacher about the homework and hit you with the "erm actually 🤓" tbh
Neon
she's on track and field/cross country
after every meet you can find her laying on the floor somewhere ready to puke bc she tries so hard to win 😭
she always ends up top 5 tho
she complains about practice but joins the team every year anyways
she carries her bag around all the time and if you open it there's like 10 water bottles in there
#hydratedqueen
Phoenix
theater kid DUHH
he's probably drama club president or sumn
bro will NOT let go of a specific song from a musical he was in his freshman year and it wasn't even his song 💀
he's been in every show every year and somehow he manages to land every role he wants
he's insanely good at the game 'bang' (mostly because he's louder than everyone else...)
he probably plans/hosts the cast parties too
Raze
she doesn't care much about her grades
she does the bare minimum and gets straight Cs
she's just here to have fun
everyone likes her because of her approachable personality
she doesn't think she's popular but she is
Sage
she's in the medical assistant class
she takes it very seriously, as she plans on going to medical school
even before taking the class she carries a first aid kit and other essentials everywhere she goes
you need a bandaid? ibuprofen? a pad or tampon? she has it all
she's also ASB president
school events literally would not be able to run without her
lets just say her college applications/resume will look REALLY good...
Skye
she also took medical assistant but was less crazy about it than Sage
she just follows her friend's lead
she thinks the skills are useful but she doesn't see herself making it her career
but also I think she would play volleyball
she's a well rounded player but specializes most in defense
still, don't underestimate her bc this girl can SPIKE
Viper
she took every ap science class offered without taking the general ones first
she complains about getting any grade below an A...
"What are you talking about? That test was easy"
sorry not everyone is as smart as you Sabine 😑
she spends all her free time at chem tutoring (even though she doesn't need it)
Yoru
he thinks he looks cool and mysterious when he walks down the halls but he doesn't
everyone just thinks his mad all the time and stay out of his way 😭
randos try to pick fights with him bc he "looked at them wrong" (Yoru wins every time)
he's not exactly a 'quiet kid' but he does lay low when it comes to the social part of school
despite his 'bad boy' look, he has pretty good grades
he's also probably one of those guys that a handful of girls have a crush on but he has no idea
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Going back to our roots here what’s your brutally honest opinion about lucaya and joshaya if you’re up for some throwbacks
this message physically aged me 45 years 😭
lucaya- like, it was obviously planned from the beginning, but here's the thing: their dynamic was tired as hell. you see it in every piece of media ever. they were BORING. also I just genuinely almost never liked lucas lmfao. there were a handful of lines throughout 3 seasons that got a laugh out of me- and it was always when he was playing the idiot or confused part, if they had just let him be the wannabe eric of the show it could have been amazing. as for maya, I definitely wasn't as attached to her as I was riley, she just kinda got on my nerves a bit, but Dear God Did She Deserve Better. the triangle was drawn out WAY too long. by the end of it both girls should have left lucas in the dust. we see the 'official' triangle plotline start on new years eve, and end in late september/early october. in no world should it have taken him that long, ESPECIALLY when he knew what a strain it was putting on the girls relationship. if he really cared he would have stepped back, like, literally, it is very very possible to have feelings for someone and not date them, oh my God. farkle had the girls fighting over him ONE time and was like 'hey no I love you guys too much to see you upset'. lucas friar you will always be hated<3
joshaya- I need to get this out of the way because I saw it so much: maya was not trying to date josh when she snuck into the college party. the college girls were not telling josh to date maya. one of josh's friends hits on maya and riley and maya said We Are In Eighth Grade. she's not delusional. the whole episode was how she wanted josh to stop ignoring her. there's subtext ladies!!! cory and topanga were practically raising maya since she was 5. even if it's not addressed too well on screen, you have to be aware that maya and josh have known each other practically their whole lives. considering how close josh is with cory, riley, and auggie, that tells us he saw the family on a regular basis growing up (he literally left his parents and took a train at like 4 in the morning just so cory could open his college letter with him). so josh and maya were likely good friends as children! what we see with his introduction to the show is he starts treating her more as a kid, as his niece's friend, and thinks her feelings are silly and she says No. I need you to take me seriously here. I don't want our friendship to change just because you're in college now. my feelings are not stupid and I want you to respect me. (also. side note. they never said josh's age in the show right?? because for him to start college when he did would make him older than he should have been based on the boy meets world timeline...like, I was kinda working under the assumption he skipped a grade or two in high school but everyone else was like Known Grown Man And Pedophile Josh Matthews Asked A Toddler To Go To The Movies As Friends lmfao). anyway. she asks him to respect her and he does!!! genuine shock and awe! lucas friar found dead in a ditch! lmao. their vague 'let's see how we feel in a few years' talk reminded me a lot of the cory/topanga yearbook quote scene, and they had great chemistry! it didn't feel like something I've seen a thousand times before. it's not like they promised to swear off dating and wait for her 18th birthday, she was basically dating zay by the end of the show. they just said 'we've known each other for a while, there's definitely something between us but this isn't the right time for us to explore it, so let's be friends like we used to' (see: what lucas should have done during the triangle). josh had a tiny bit of an edge to him, but with the dorky matthews heart, which tbh was exactly what maya wanted. I loved how maya acted around josh, it lead to some of her funniest and most open moments in the show. I loved how gentle josh was with her even when she was being annoying. I love a good childhood crush to actual lovers story! sue me! lmao I think if the show had gotten as many seasons as boy meets world they really could have been something special
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Note
Hi so sorry to bother (⁠•⁠ ⁠▽⁠ ⁠•⁠;⁠)
But
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Can you make a part 2 of this with non toman members?
You don't have to!
Hello hello
Yess OFC ❤️
I'm really happy that you guys liked that post 🥹 🫶 And honey you are not a bother okay?
And I'm very sorry that this took very long too 🥲🙏
So let's get started shall we?
Non!Toman members reacting to a gn!reader who is as strong as Yor from spy x family
Shinichiro: Is impressed. Especially if you fought infront of him in his Black Dragon era. Beacuse we all know that he wasn't a good nor that much of a strong fighter. If he got to know your strength when you protected him wheter youu were in Black Dragon or not he feels embarrased. So he tries to repay you in any way that you want. He basiclly becomes your servant for a while even if you don't like it.
Izana: Would be impressed. He wouldn't be so suprised since he met a lot of people in his life that looked like an avrage person but they were strong. But not as strong as you tho. Would probably ask for your training routine and if you tell him that you don't really have one his jaw drops but if you do have one he will be your training buddy from that day since he's inspired by your strength.
Inui: We well know that he respected both Shinichiro and Taiju. When he got to know that you're even stronger than Taiju (if Taiju's BD is still active): he introduced you to Taiju and you either joined or not, (if Taiju got changed down): he tried getting along with you more trying to figurate out your strength.
Taiju: Probably got to know your strength after he tried beating you up for god knows what reason and he was impressed. Never seen a person besides Mikey who could do some more serious damage to him until he met you if you met him after the Black Dragon era. But if you met him before the BD era he probably asked you to join to the gang. If you accept it he'll spar with you from time to time and you earn a respect in his heart but if you refuse he wants to kill you on the spot.
Shion: So we know that he's another one of those people who likes beating others up. So I can only imagine him meeting you while you were in either Izana's gang or the Kantou Manji gang or you just almost got beaten up by him. You will have his respect that's a 100%.
Hanma: Now him... I think his reaction would be the weirdest tbh. He'd try to fight you (if you're not that close), would laugh at it from the shock, would tease you. He'd make your life a bit or maybe too much miserable.
Kisaki: I feel like he'd try to use you for his plans and all when he gets to know how strong you really are. Especially if you're close to Mikey. He would respect you but his plans are more important to him than other people.
Naoto: Since he works at the police you were most likely his college. You were still new to the job and had him assigned to you as a partner-teacher. You guys had to catch a violent criminal who beat up one pair of partners before you two were chosen. So you guys go and investigate after the man who you guys found pretty quick. He tried to attack you but you easily took him out like it was nothing while Naoto was standing in the back shocked and impressed.
South: Oh so you're a "tank" like him. He's even worse than Taiju. Doesn't care if you're friend or enemy he will fight you and try to beat you up every single time he sees you. I'm sorry but there's no escape for you unless you move into a different country or the other side of Japan.
Wakasa: Let's say that you met him in Barhman. Senju talked a lot about you but he didn't really belive the girls sayings until he saw you fighting in a gang fight. He was impressed which he showed with a smirk on his face but didn't really have time to actually react, but after the fight he teased you about it and Senju annoyed Waka since he didn't belive what she said.
Benkei: Like at Waka's, you giys keet in Brahman and Senju non-stop talks about how cool you are, how strong you are etc. He would belive Senju but would think that she's exaggerating by a lot. And then you guys get in a gangfight where he pays attention to you and well now he belives Senju and that she wasn't exaggerating. He's impressed by your strenght very much. After the fight he would probably go up to you and ask how did you get to that level.
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safyresky · 7 months
Text
So, Season 2. It's. It's alright ¯\_(ツ)_/¯
But like...that's it, lmao.
I did enjoy it! I got WAY MORE genuine laughs out of these first two episodes than I did the entire first season. Magnus is hilarious, I love his whole vibe lmao. Fluffy's character, Kris, he's...man is really out here looking for a father figure and it is deffs biting him in the ASS.
The elves are top tier as per the usual! Betty and Noel are continuing to be THE power couple and I am SO HAPPY ABOUT IT, I love them to death 🥰🥰🥰
My fave thing about the season so far is just everyone out here like Scott wtf are you doing. Wtf, man. I yelled GET HIS ASS so many times lol. The official Get His Ass Count as of the end of Episode 2: 8. 8 whole GET HIS ASS moments. BLESS.
SO RIGHT. NITTY GRITTY. OKAY.
Episode 1
Scott sucked SO BAD this episode. He breaks the SOS on a worldwide level then gets upset when Cal is like "I love Riley! I wished her here! We're hanging out! Riley!! :D" and is like "Bro you should've dusted her."
OKAY SCOTT. WHAT ABOUT THE WHOLE WORLD, SCOTT, HMM? ARE WE DUSTING THEM??? HMM??? YEESH.
Scott aside (you know, his usual boomer-esque old guy who refuses to change shtick with BUT WHAT ABOUT FAMILY! And whatnot thing), everything else was. Mid, tbh. But fun! Santa being like "Are you gonna kill him?" With Carol being like "I can take care of Gary" was hilarious.
Betty and Noel, of course, SHINNED. I love them, they are SO CUTE. Cardboard face cutouts??? ICONIC. Nobody is doing it like them!
Now. Cal. aka, Buddy. I am very worried for him. Like, 4 episodes ago he was having ANXIETY about being Santa? And now this? Carol being like "what if he doesn't want it don't force him to follow in your footsteps" like. I AGREE. HE SHOULD GO OFF TO COLLEGE AND LIVE HIS LIFE!!!! I have a lot of thoughts there but it is late and I need to FOCUS because I need to yell about Cupid in a second, ANYWAY
Magnus Antas. I love this guy. I fucks with him. He takes a 700 year nap and is like "I'm fine" until his toxic bestie is like "I WANT TO KILL" and a kid sasses him for not being Santa/being OLD and he's like "Nevermind. I want to kill now too. Time to MURDER." He has VIBES and I like them!! He also seems like he's was over it until Olga was like "but what if" and some kid was mean to him and tbh, I can't even blame him for getting pissy at the kid lol. I'd also turna kid into "a Roblox" if I could (here for Gamer Mad Santa btw. I'd watch him stream on Twitch)
This is verging into Episode 2 territory, lol. May as well get there, then!
EPISODE 2
So, the LORE DROPS. Um. There was a LOT of it? And it seems to contradict itself/not quite equate with itself? If the NP is a utopia for magic, why is it like that? Was Magnus good, or not? Why do ALL the fairy creatures live there, when they come from so many diverse cuktures and backgrounds? That's a lil messed up! What the fuck happened with the gnomes becoming so (what's the phrase) PROMINENT for Santa? Will we get answers for all of these? Based on past season, PROBABLY NOT! BUT I HOPE WE DO! BC IT IS A BIT ALL OVER THE PLACE! AHH!
RIGHTO. SO SANDRA'S MAGIC. Love that for her! Love that they're actually devoting time to showing her interacting with La Befana and learning about herself and the pair of them discussing things!!! MUCH rather watch that than a 5 minute long auto-tuned elf song which is there just for a Santa/Satan joke! I'm excited to see how her whole arc goes--it looks like she's ACTUALLY GETTING ONE.
I wonder why Befana needs her to tell her parents, like, aside from obvious reasons. She was so insistent on Sandra making sure her parents knew she was training with Befana, that I'm wondering if there's something more to it a la "our powers don't work on other legendary figures". Like, was it to keep her mind clear? Is it like a past thing? Bc Witches are "scary" and often "bad" given that Santa calls Befana a "good one"?
That's another thign! Not sure I vibed with THAT whole thing. Both Claus's being like "yeah witches, they are deffs their stereotypes". Like. Idk. It sits. Not gr8 with me. Feels like performative activism, sorta, you know?
Which is also how I feel about the girl power moments, tbh. Like, it's nice to see them--Carol respecting Befana as a self-made woman, sister solidarity, etc. But it feels very performative! It feels very much like they are checking it off a list, you know? They're STILL like "Carol is trying to find a role for Mrs. Claus" and they go for COP? Wildin. Also wildin that the ELFS are COP EQUIVALENTS? Um, since WHEN?! They are funky little guys with jet packs and no regard for authority. Remember when they broke Santa out of jail and bullied the cop at the front desk? Remember that? YEAH.
OKAY SO NOW MY FAVOURITE PART TO TALK ABOUT. CUPID AND THE COUNCIL!
So as a classics major and a lover of the Cupid/Psyche myth (and personal bias from OCs made bc of said myth) I was unimpressed with the Mrs. Cupid convo. FIRST off, her name is PSYCHE so jot that down. SECONDLY. It was ONE ARROW MEANT FOR HER THAT SOMEHOW GOT LODGED INTO CUPID ACCIDENTALLY WHILE SENT ON AN ERRAND BY HIS MOTHER, VENUS, TO TAKE CARE OF (make her fall in love with a horrible monster/something/someone very ugly) PSYCHE BC SHE WAS SO BEAUTIFUL WORSHIP WAS DROPPING FOR VENUS AND GOING TO PSYCHE.
This resulted in Cupid and Psyche having a very strange romance/marriage in which Psyche's shitty sisters convince her to break Cupid's one rule (which was don't look at me) and he gets injured, HELD HOSTAGE by his mother, and Psyche has to go on a QUEST to free him that involves Venus making her do all sorts of shitty shenanigans, setting the personifications of sadness and despair on her, and trapping her in an eternal sleep. Cupid, afflcited by his own arrow, escapes his mother's house when he hears about this, finds her, and draws the sleep out of her, waking her up and reuniting them.
They then proceed to go to Zeus (not Jupiter despite Cupid being the Roman equivalent of Eros, and Venus roman of Aphrodite? It's interesting) like LOOK WHAT VENUS DID and Zeus goes "Wow, that's a little fucked up, actually. Listen, I'll make her a god and sanction your marriage and tell of your Mom IF you do something a little fucked up for me and help me get ANY woman I want" to which Cupid goes "Sure, that sounds reasonable and not fucked up at all" and then he and Psyche get married and have a fucking rager with the gods and have one kid, Pleasure, aka Hedone/Volupta, or in SOME iterations, THREE kids, Pleasure, Joy, and a third one who's name escapes me (Vanity I think) and presumably live happily ever after! READ FOR YOURSELF!
I am very passionate about this bc uh. this is uh. Dite's whole ass backstory? She is Hedone lmao so I've got some personal attachment here thanks to me own OCs lmao, ANYWAY
So YEAH that got me miffed. As did uh, the whole PEEKABOO and cupid making baby noises back at Riley. The ICK.
But you know what I DID love?? Cupid being like "I'm not spying but also, I am spying and also, the whole ass entire council is like BOI...WHAT THE FUCK". GET HIS ASS! CALL HIM OUT!! BC YEAH, WHAT THE FUCK SCOTT?? SEASON 1?? HELLO??? EVERYTHING BEFORE THAT??? VIOLATING THE SOS BY SHARING ALL THOSE SNOW GLOBES??? AHHHHHHH.
Cupid delivering that 3 month deadline and Council threat I was like. HERE for it. I was like. GET HIS ASS (this was one of the GHA counter moments tbh). Like, this dude is out of control! I think it's high time Scott meets the consequences for his actions! AH!
So YEAH. Excited to see Sandy and for New EB! I hope the whole Council comes back, even if they have to recast, that 5 minute scene would add YEARS to my life that Riley and Cal took away.
Because they are. So icky. I feel as though. There is a scale. And Marie is on one end, and Riley is on the other. This isn't just FIRST LOVE this is just DISGUSTING. Like it was cute at first last season but now Riley is honestly?? Sups annoying. You can tell that they're like, checking items off the list instead of actually putting more thought into them, because Riley is v much a stereotype and they have WAY UPPED her teenager levels. I need them to talk to actual teens. Nobody says OMG like that and also, she's bringing home BIKERS?????????? UM??????? It's like. Why are they so bad at writing love interests? You feel? Tho this could just be a me thing 🤔🤔🤔
They really should've socialized those kids, DAMN. Santa being like "And we all know how that [Romeo and Juliet] went" or whatever the line was had me like "FINALLY SCOTTY BOY. SOMETHING WE CAN AGREE ON!"
AND LAST ON MY LIST. THE SCOTT/SANDRA SCENE.
Finally. Finally. FINALLY. Some good parenting from Scott. FINALLY. Being sups understanding to Sandra? I actually loved it. He finally did ONE (1) GOOD THING. MAYBE HE IS? LEARNING? I DUNNO MAN! WE'LL SEE HOW IT GOES! But yeah, I did like that scene a lot. I'm just really here for Sandra getting her moment!
So YEAH. Overall, season 2 is okay. Gave me more laughs which is WELCOME, and I cannot wait to see how this develops. Especially since the lore was like, really thrown our way, you know? It was a lot for two episodes and again, did kind of contradict itself? Hopefully it clears up once Santa inevitably learns the truth about Mad Santa, probably mostly thanks to Carol who is DOING the MOST.
But yeah, I'm hoping to see the lore tidied/explained a bit better. Especially bc the whole elf lore opening, with the icy tunnels and drab vibes, didn't sit well with me? It...I didn't like it. Not my cup of tea. The lore in general isn't my cup of tea though it's fun to see it there finally, lol. Poor Toots, being named after a fart essentially (I went right to toilet humour, I'm sorry, I am so mature I promise i'm not)
Also, they really kinda. Throw around the head elf title, huh? It felt REALLY WEIRD to not see BMan there, and Toots just being thrown in? Weird it's WEIRD. I wouldn't bring B-Man back for it but MAN IS IT WEIRD. Especially since the new elves, as much as I ADORE THEM, don't have the same kind of like. Old feel to them? As the movie elves did? So I was like "they should NOT be there right now. They should NOT."
Righto. I am going to wrap this up bc I am INSANE and this is very very VERY long for a franchise like this 😅😅😅
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tennessoui · 1 year
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So. About "hand-me-down dreams got me high in the rafters".
I-- I'm kinda speechless here because I don't even know where to start. Wow.
Usually humiliation, Very Very Bad™ BDSM dynamics and this level of assholishness are major turn-offs for me. Yet somehow you managed to sail through that entire mine field without setting off a single one. I have no idea how you did it but I am in awe and also a bit weak-kneed tbh.
Your end note is also sending me. In my head Anakin insists that he has to finish college because he doesn't want to disappoint his mum even more so they get to the compromise that Anakin changes to one that's within driving distance so he can still live with Obi-Wan. Who remains utterly shameless and a moral black hole and is only all to happy to rub it in people's faces that he's snagged this absolute angel for himself. Said angel is turning into a spoilt rotten monster who only has to pout and whimper "Daddy/Husband..." to get his way.
I can just imagine Anakin thriving as a trophy wife/husband/baby boy/wife-boy to an unhinged but doting Obi-Wan. His social media accounts would be wild. Tabloids would be all over them, there'd be Youtube commentaries and essays on their Problematic™ relationship, they'd be the new Kardashians with how you can't escape their presence even if you want to. These two assholes would revel in it and how uncomfortable they make everyone around them. (Anakin 100% shows up to a red carpet event with Obi-Wan while dressed in a dress that's more artfully draped lace and rhinestones than actual clothing. It doesn't survive the night.)
Sorry, I completely hijacked your story there. 😅 What I mean to say is that this AU, against all odds, has me by the throat and is living rent-free in my head.
DID I MENTION IT WAS SMOKING HOT AND THAT I LOVED EVERY AWFUL THING ABOUT IT??
(I was going to make this an AO3 comment but once I finished writing it, I felt it had more Tumblr-energy. 😅)
oooo so okay love this ask!!! glad to hear the squicks weren't TOO squicky i know they were very very heavy squicks thank you for giving it a try!!!
anakin would thrive as a boy toy tbh that's going to be him for the rest of forever
as for the end note (primarily re: anakin reminding obi-wan that he's in college and will go back at the end of summer), i gotta say i think they compromise but your compromise is almost TOO healthy for this au and this obi-wan
i do think for the college question, obi-wan does not want anakin to finish. it doesn't matter where he goes, he doesn't want anakin to leave OR finish college. why should he have to? obi-wan will take care of all of his needs. so long as he stays dependent....on obi-wan.
anakin (thinking he is master manipulator again) is like well how do i know you'll take care of all of my needs? what if you fall in love with the new pool boy and forget about me?
and obi-wan is offended that anakin is almost doubting his ability to be in control
but really, anakin is saying marry me so we're legally bound together and i know you'll take care of me forever and ever as anakin kenobi
and obi-wan who doesn't particularly want to get married again after his previous marriage is like hm. HM.
and anakin is like if you marry me i won't go back to college, you have until the end of the summer to deci--
and obi-wan is like 'sold, let's go.'
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youremyheaven · 2 months
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I don’t think all venusians are bad but I also had a share of bad experiences with them. I don’t know if I should drag the women or the men first. I’d talk about the women first because they’re in my family and it’s a more neutral point of view than hate or a one time experience. My purva ashada stellium grandmother used to starve her children too and is extremely cheap. Tbh I don’t think she has a bad relationship with her daughters. She seems to get along with them pretty well. However my mom who’s purva phalguni moon has similar behavior as the previous ano. She’s very jealous and envious of other women constantly comparing herself to other women and she needs to be the “best looking” among others. Otherwise she lose her mind. She’s very image conscious and she’s a complete different person with strangers or my friends. She wants to be seen as the cool mom. She also assumes every single man she interacts with has some sort of romantic interest in her. She also says phrases like “you’ll never be as attractive as used to be” like even if It was true and I was a walking troll she shouldn’t be saying this to her daughter ? I also find it weird how every single Venusian woman I talk to is extremely fake ? Like they’re obsessed with status and want to be seen as higher or richer than what they actually are. They love to see people beneath them. They strive to be the best in that way. They’re very superficial and they would definitely befriend someone or be around someone for the aesthetic or for what they could get from them. They would take shamelessly from people without giving back and when you called them out they be like “I didn’t ask you to” when they truly did pressure you into it. I think for men, most Venusian men I met, they would be very polite, kind helpful and try to please me as much as possible. Like they would get interested in my hobbies and try to get close to me with some hidden intention or purpose to it. When I don’t get fooled by their act, it’s almost as their mask drops and I see another version of them that is much cruel and mean ? It’s like they want to “punish” you. They would paint themselves as the victim because you didn’t give them what they wanted or desired from you. Whatever that is. They would tarnish your reputation or come for you in settings. Now, I don’t think I had many Venusian friends (only 2 ) that are woman but they both would lie and act as if they’re “rich” even if they’re not and I already know they’re not and I don’t even care because I never bring such things up.
💀💀💀u have described so many people i know, its crazyyy,, one girl i went to college with who had Saturn in Bharani atmakaraka was just like u described. she was upper middle class at best but she wanted to be seen as rich so bad?? she'd insert random details to make herself sound 🤑🤑she spoke about how much she spent on clothes even tho she always wore the same stuff on repetition?? (im not being a hater, her comments always just made no sense??) she'd talk about how her family only fed their dog specially bought meat and it was just ??? i hated the way she spoke about money and same goes for another Venusian girlie i know, she wont shut up about money and always exaggerates for good effect?? its so cringe to me ngl. theyre also the type of people who want to put others down to feel better about themselves. I think Venusians in general don't like it when someone tries to imply that they're on the same "level" so they always put others down to establish superiority. every Venusian woman I know is arrogant and conceited in some ways. one time the atmakaraka chick told me that her dad bought her a new car and i was like ok good for you? and she always spoke about how its her car when it was actually just a new car for the fam after they disposed off the old one?? lol?
one time my friends and i were eating out and a really cute kid (5-6 yr old girl) and her mom came in, all my friends said that the kid resembled me quite a bit and the Bharani ak girl said "yeah she's chubby like you" 🤡🤡🤡first of all the kid wasn't "chubby" by a long shot, and even if she was who tf says that about a 5yr old??? she just wanted to establish dominance? and did not like the fact that others thought we resembled each other lmao?? what a complete asshole, imagine insulting a literal child and your friend?? Venusian women do not like it when other women seem to have the upper hand in any way. They are not girls girls, i have said this before and i'll say it again Venusians are the OG "im not like other girls" girl.
im so sorry you went through all that anon. i wish you healing and peace<3
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