Ada Limon ~ Joint Custody

friendly reminder than adoptive sibling and step siblings are NOT the same thing and these terms are not interchangeable [unless well the step marriage has lead to an adoption of the step sibling]

Waybright Revisted : Amphibia Fic

Julie has never really been close with her kind-of step-sister Sasha Waybright. But then Sasha goes missing, which is strange. And then she comes back, and that somehow makes things even stranger.

Are you part of a blended family?

Are you a step-parent who is struggling to understand your role? Are you a step-child who feels unsettled by the family dynamics? Are you a biological parent who feels like they are being pulled from all different angles? I’m writing some articles about the experiences of being in a blended/stepfamily, if you would like to share your experiences with me you can do so anonymously here.

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Me sitting through Christmas Eve/Day while my spoiled, cruel stepdaughter and abusive control-freak partner make me feel like absolute shit…

…because God forbid I come across as the Wicked Stepmother®️ and lose my temper.

I’m so fucking tired of being the scapegoat for everything going wrong in their lives; the passive cardboard-cutout of the Dutiful Mothering/Housewife Type®️ (while lacking the respect and authority a “real” mother and wife is actually supposed to have) for them to take their frustrations out on. I’m sick of it…it’s literally making me sick.

I’m so relieved I don’t have to move in with him this New Years, like originally planned. I get to stay in school a little while longer…

I feel so trapped and empty. My mental health and feelings are irrelevant. My emotions and opinions and experiences are just something for them to make endless fun of. I say “please stop joking about___” and they keep going, no matter how many times I tell them they’re crossing the line and it’s hurting me…in fact, it’s like the more I try to set limits and boundaries in the first place, the more sadistic joy they get tearing down and violating these limits and boundaries.

I exist as a dish-washing machine, a shoulder to cry on (that’s not allowed to cry herself,) a punching bag (physically, mentally, emotionally) for a fortysomething who never forgave his own stepmother (and is trying to somehow punish her by punishing me)…and his kid is following in his footsteps: learning that it’s ok to be a bully; to cross boundaries…as long as it serves/is amusing to them.

I’m sorry your marriage failed. That isn’t my problem.

I’m sorry your parents are divorced. That isn’t my problem.

Fuck. I wish I didn’t love them so much. Idk if this is even “love…” how can I be 29 years old and have never known a healthy love?

How can I be 29 years old, with professional skills and a previous career, on the brink of getting my degree…and not be able to imagine my life without them? The people who get off on hurting me when they want to; who demand nurturing when they want it…

But nono!—I can NEVER stand up for myself, lest I be the (*gasp!!* Sacre bleu!!) Wicked Stepmother/Bitchy Second Wife®️!!!!

I promise I love my family, but I’ve been at my mom’s house for less than an hour and I’m already annoyed and overwhelmed by them. They are so loud, they keep asking me things and then not waiting for the answer and then asking more things before circling back around. They always try to answer questions themselves instead of just listening to my answer. Goddamn it.

scorched earth policy

Its all going down baby.

Estranged sister texted me, whining that I am not talking to my step dad. Remind you that this is the same abusive stepdad that tried to make me feel bad when the family member that sexually assaulted me finally died a horrible and painful death. Its also the same stepfather that tried to guilt me into talking to my sister, and enlisted my brother to guilt me in to it as well.

I have boundaries because that is what makes me feel safe. That is what keeps me going. And these three trampled right over them.

Scortched earth baby. I have no more extended family. It is done.

Blog 33

What I have got to tell:

I played Sims for the first time in my life. The person playing the violin is my character. They are also an astronaut intern. I made it where they are a loner and can't get with anyone. Their place was literally an empty lot where I plopped a labyrinth, a kitchen, and a bathroom, as well as a random bed and bunk beds and a stuffed dragon and a radio and a chess table with mismatched chairs in the lawn. The ghost is the other character I made who was green and chubby and had a rainbow tank top and pink pants and pink hair and beard, with the pronouns fe/fi/fo/fum/fumself. And fe had ace flag colored nails. Fe was also the sibling of the violinist. Unfortunately, there was a kitchen fire while fo sibling was at work and fe died. Anyway, so the top-hatted character was initially distraught (as I was also a bit horrified), but then shared a grilled cheese and befriended the grim reaper. Anyway, they got another roommate, who my sibling had randomly generated, that has long hair and wears all black. Anyway, I have him flirt with all the guys he sees. No success, unfortunately. Also, he's a criminal and likes athletics apparently. Also, there was a point with the first character I described where they went to the library, insulted people, read books, played Sims, and slept on one of the benches. Which, mood, I guess.

I helped my sibling get a desktop computer from Best Buy yesterday, hence why we were playing games. The computer is actually for his Intro to Promotional Video class.

One interesting and awkward thing today is that my half-brother wanted to see his cat, and he suggested that I also play with the cat. But the cat is staying at his dad's house. I haven't hung around my ex-step-dad since I was 11 years old, making it 16 years ago from now. It went alright. I rode in the back of the car for over 40 minutes to his house. I was mostly silent during the visit where I either played with the cat or transfixed my eyes on my brother's dad's bookshelf, which was an interesting collection. He had at least three books on faeries. He pointed one out and I pulled it down from the shelf, was a coffee table book of the different types of faeries (also known as elves, apparently) based on cultural beliefs in Europe. He noticed that I was actually reading the text rather than just browsing through the illustrations and told me that I could borrow it. One the way back, my ex-step-dad listened to some Celtic violin music. It was comforting, and reminded me that despite everything a lot of tastes and personality developed during the 4 year period in which I had lived with him, as during that time I was exposed to a lot of intellectual and cultural topics that I probably wouldn't have been exposed to otherwise.

Food:

Breakfast: went to my brother's building and cooked eggs and bacon. I shattered the one bowl that I owned trying to get the pan out of my backpack. My brother made coffee.

Dinner: Went to the cafeteria and sat with the friends that my brother made during pre-orientation. The two guys across from me were computer geeks, they asked questions about my brother's new computer. My brother didn't know how to answer some of them so I helped. I had a salad, fries, and a mini poppy seed muffin. Then I got another dessert which was some sort of muffin pudding in a plastic cup and whipped cream and a small cookie on top. I had the water with the citrus in it.

Future:

One of the students in the class I will be taking was my roommate all last year, coincidentally. And it seems like my brother will have to be taking two classes at once one day a week because they completely overlap on thursdays. Luckily they are both online classes. I kinda want to sit in for his figure drawing class because his drawing class makes me want to practice again, even if I don't get credit. Also, I still need to figure out my food SNAP benefits.

5 Gift Ideas to Celebrate Stepfamily Day!

Stepfamily gifts serve as gestures of appreciation and inclusivity. They convey the message that each member matters and is an integral part of the family. These tokens of affection provide common ground and shared experiences, helping to build stronger relationships by bringing everyone closer and fostering a sense of unity within the stepfamily. Here are 5 gift ideas to celebrate stepfamily day:

1.Board Games: Board games like "Ticket to Ride" or "Settlers of Catan" can be great for family bonding.

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2.Spa Gift Set: A spa gift set with bath bombs, essential oils, and other relaxation items can provide a soothing experience for your stepfamily.

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3.Customized Mugs: Personalized mugs with each family member's name or a family photo can be a heartwarming gift.

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4.Family Photo Album: Compile a photo album with pictures of your family's memorable moments.

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5.Outdoor Adventure Gear: If your stepfamily enjoys the outdoors, consider items like camping gear, hiking equipment, or a picnic basket.

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Of Tiny Tots, Mistaken Identities, and Reunions

Seventeen year old Damian Wayne is dragged to a business deal outside of Gotham (along with his father and Drake), mostly to keep up appearances that the family does work outside of Gotham, networking, and because Damian does need to learn the ropes of the company, he decides to head outside the meeting with the Manson family to get a breather (mainly cause the Manson's were annoying him fully, it was like they were trying to suck up towards Damian and trying to push their daughter on him but at the same time he caught them almost insulting and hostile towards him before they would stop and correct themselves) when out of the blue a three year old toddler with black hair comes running over with a cheerful "Daddy!" and latches onto his leg.

Damian is stunned in place but feels frozen when he hears a voice, older and almost identical to his own but he can detect a familiarity in it, a voice he only hears in his dreams nowadays say.

"Ellie, no! That's not me Starlight! I'm so sorry dude-"

When Damian turned his head towards the voice he's meet with an near identical face, granted there were some minor differences, but very, very familiar pair of striking blue eyes staring at him. Eyes that were somehow full of life, which shouldn't be possible because the last time he saw those eyes they had been dim and milked over years ago. The speaker had become startled at the his sudden turn and the words that he had been saying had quickly died out when he too took in Damian's features.

"D...Damian?..." the name came out so soft and small that Damian almost didn't hear it but he did.

And before Damian could stop himself, he spoke a name he hadn't dared utter in years.

"Danyal."

His twin looked like he had just seen a ghost, and Damian was sure he looked the same. And given the last time they had last saw each other it was no wonder they both looked like death warmed over them for a moment.

After all... Damian had failed to protect his brother, Danyal al Ghul all those years ago on a botched mission.

His bother who... wasn't dead.

His brother who was looking like he wanted to run but was keeping himself rooted in his spot.

His brother whose eyes were glancing downwards and seemed so nervous.

His brother who knew the little girl, Ellie, still hugging his legs.

His brother who had... responded and corrected her mix up when she had called Damian 'Daddy.'

And oh, she's looking up at him and making grabby hands wanting to be picked up and she has Danyal's eyes and his nose and-

Oh... Damian.... Damian's an uncle it seems.

Only in my wacky life, what should I do?

Well as of recently I've finally been able to really move on past the feelings for my ex and explore other options. However, I've had little success. During this time I have also become closer with my step sister (and yes this is probably going exactly where you think, maybe?). As a little preface to our. relationship before this we were practically strangers who lived together. Although our parents moved in when me and my step sister were both young (around 6) we never got a long and always bickered. This ended in us just really avoiding each other. But as of recently I have began smoking weed a lot more, a past time she also enjoys. I think this and a theory that I'm pretty sure is true being; as she dropped out of college her first year and moved back in with me and the parents (I go to a community college near our house). Anyways the theory is that because of that a lot of her relationships/friendships deteriorated as well as lack of romantic success drove her to feel lonely. And I think she kinda latched on to me in a time when she felt she had not very many people and now has incorporated me more in to her life. Anyways long story short it's been really weird because the dynamic that me and her share is in lots of ways similar to the one I had with my ex. I think of myself as an accommodator and someone who's like always wary of how others feel and trying to help and be there etc. Anyways my ex was very needy so I was always doing things to accommodate and my sister is also similarly needy. This combined with the large amount of time I now spend with her just chillin and smoking has had me start to develop feelings. On top of all that, our parents went out of town multiple times in the past couple of months leaving me and her to just be in the house alone as if we were living in it (again our dynamic being one that feels like a relationship to me). The only sobering thing is that we are not physical at all. I'm actually a very physical person, but we aren't physical mainly due to her not being comfortable with it and like not like im gonna push any boundaries like that. I also know like 99.99% that she does not feel the way I do and tells me how disgusted she gets when people mistake us for boyfriend girlfriend. One recent example being I dropped off lunch to her at work and her coworker thought I was her boyfriend. Also on top of me knowing what her type is and that I do not fit in to that category at all. Anyways the most uncomfortable thing for me is that because of all these feelings it feels weird hanging out with her and I have crazy ass dreams about her every night were we are basically living together but actually like dating and fucking xD. The thing is I know having a romantic relationship with her would fill the "missing" parts right now too, because I am very in need of that at the moment. Anyways what should I do? any interesting thoughts or ideas?

TLDR: The relationship I have with my step-sister feels like a romantic one minus physical contact. It has also made me start developing feelings for her although I'm 99.99% sure she does not have any back. I also get dreams about being in an actual romantic relationship and my feelings about her so hanging out is awkward. What should I do?

one time I was on vacation for my aunt and uncle's wedding and my cousins, my sister, and I were going to go to this carnival that was happening up the street and be alone together, since my cousin wanted to destress before she had to walk her dad down the aisle the next day, and as we were leaving he pulled her aside like 'Hey I'm going to make your stepbrothers come, too. They should get to spend time with the four of you because it's not going to happen often' and we were just like 'alright, whatever'... so they went and met us at the fairgrounds and they didn't even hang out with us...

Are you part of a blended family?

Are you a step-parent who is struggling to understand your role? Are you a step-child who feels unsettled by the family dynamics? Are you a biological parent who feels like they are being pulled from all different angles? I’m writing some articles about the experiences of being in a blended/stepfamily, if you would like to share your experiences with me you can do so anonymously here.

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A gift of love for your BONUS daughter https://etsy.me/3KLiCC3

I hate being wasian with a white step-dad, bro says the most like pseudo racist things 24/7

And just like that, it all fell apart

My mom died. He refused to help me. Once again I was left alone in my grief.

Hes moving out tomorrow. He has lied to me every single day since we decided to seperate. I am ok with him leaving, why couldn't he just be honest.

Step dad and my brother guilted me into talking to my sister. It was about how I am a bad sister because I didnt' support her during the funeral. I didn't run to her and embrace her. I haven't seen her in 15 years. And if its why I didn't run to her, why didn't she run to me? She didn't even go to pizza after. But we texted. I did my duty.

Step dad returned the $500 in gas gift cards I sent him and my mom when she was sick. I tried to be helpful, but he has decided to be cruel.

I am weeding people out of my life. I need to treat my life like a garden and get rid of the plants that don't make me feel beautiful or useful or nurtured. Four are now out of my life.

I am going to be making a list of how I want my life to look in 6, 12, 18 and 24 months from now. Where I want to be and how I want my life to be. From there I can make an action plan and make some good decisions.

But for now, I am taking care of me. Because nobody else will do it.