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emeraldspiral · 9 months

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I feel like we don't talk enough about how Gaz is also a victim of Membrane's neglect and how that affects her sibling rivalry with Dib.

Like, I think because Dib is the deuteragonist of the show and Gaz is a supporting character it's easier to focus on analyzing him and everything going on in his life that influences his maladjusted behavior. But not a lot of people talk as much about why Gaz is the way she is. Why are her main emotions apathy and anger? Why is she the only other kid at skool besides Dib and Zim with no friends to hang out with at lunch or recess? Why are her revenges against Dib over things like cereal and pizza so over-the-top? Why does she purposefully try to destroy all human life and then get mad when it doesn't work?

Some of Gaz's behaviors have a pretty clear-cut cause and effect. She and Dib don't get to spend much time with their dad, so she gets upset when Dib's actions threaten their time together. Dib is also selfish and inconsiderate of Gaz, frequently stealing her food or talking her ear off about stuff she doesn't care about and expecting her to take an interest while never asking about her hobbies.

But I think some of her hostility toward Dib and general sour attitude can also be explained by Membrane's unequal treatment.

I've seen elsewhere that some people think Membrane favors Gaz because she's his "normal" child. He actually respects her gaming hobby and doesn't treat it like a phase she needs to grow out of. He doesn't talk down to her or try to push her into giving up something she loves in order to win his approval. Where Dib is constantly arguing with his dad about the legitimacy of his version of science, he and Gaz seem to have an easy rapport free of that kind of tension.

But is Membrane's behavior toward Gaz really a sign of favoritism, or just a different form of neglect?

The main conflict between Dib and Membrane stems from Membrane wanting Dib to be his successor. In Chickenfoot he specifically calls Dib "the future of the Membrane Empire", against Dib's wishes. In Mopiness of Doom, he and Dib finally bond when Dib decides to temporarily give up paranormal science and assist him with "real science". And supposedly, part of Eric Trueheart's clone Dib concept was that Membrane engineered Dib specifically to carry on his legacy.

But all of this begs the question, where does Gaz fit into Membrane's grand designs? Is she just the spare? She's just as smart, if not smarter than Dib, but we never see any indication that Membrane's trying to push her toward a career in science the way he is with Dib. It's one thing for him to not be bothered about her gaming hobby because it's not "disreputable", but there's no indication that Gaz has anymore interest in becoming a "real" scientist than Dib. So does Membrane just assume that since she's never shown any other ambitions she'll just fall straight down the path that's already been laid out for her, or does he just not care what she does with her life because he's only focused on living vicariously through Dib?

We don't know exactly how Membrane views his kids, but it's easy to see how a little girl might come to some pretty negative conclusions about what her status is in her father's eyes. Even if it's not true, Gaz might very well believe that he favors Dib. That despite Dib rejecting the legacy she was never considered for, despite him constantly getting into trouble and being weird and annoying and embarrassing, and putting his stupid hobbies ahead of their family, their dad doesn't give up on him as a lost cause. Even when he has another perfectly good child who mostly behaves herself and stays out of trouble, would never try to upstage him or ruin an important moment for him, who appreciates what little time they have together and would never jeopardize it by running off to play with some stupid alien, and who's just as smart and capable and not a weirdo paranormal-obsessed freak, Membrane still wants Dib to be his successor and not her.

Not only does this add more layers to her contempt for Dib, it could also explain her apathy and misanthropy. If her dad doesn't care about her, why should she care about anything? If he isn't concerned with her future, why should she concern herself with anything other than the immediate gratification of video games and pizza? Her dad and her brother both think their work is so much more important than spending quality time with her or talking about anything other than their "important work" whenever they're together. They both think they're saving the world, but they're either too blindly optimistic or too egotistical to realize that the slack-jawed idiots populating the planet are beyond salvation. But maybe if there was no humanity left for them to save, no heroic ambitions to fulfill, they'd finally treat her like someone worth paying attention too.

#invader zim #gaz #gaz membrane #professor membrane #dib #dib membrane #gaz is just as messed up as dib #her trauma just expresses itself in different ways

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blouisparadise · 4 months

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Upon request, today we have a rec list of bottom Louis fics that feature badass Louis. If you enjoy our rec lists and want them to continue, please be sure to like and reblog this post to help spread the word. Happy reading!

1) Bite | Mature | 10,980 words

Louis is a vampire hunter, and Harry is too happy being his prey.

2) Don't Call Me Angel | Mature | 16,648 words

Manhattan is a dangerous playground for the rich and entitled Alphas of New York. Those same wealthy Alphas are robbed after spending one night in the presence of a blue-eyed Omega and Officer Styles is assigned to the case.

3) Friendly Neighborhood Spideypool | Explicit | 18,705 words

“Don’t fuck with me, I’m not in the mood.” Louis’ got the urge to punch him in the face, but he knows deep down that if anything it’ll just add fuel to Harry's innuendo fire. “You know I only fuck you, not with you. There’s a difference. It’s slight but still there.” He’s joking, but it’s sincere in a way that only Deadpool could make it. It gives Louis a strange mix of emotions, his body doesn’t know whether to fill with butterflies or to knee Deadpool in the balls again for insinuating them fucking.

4) Death Wish | Explicit | 22,067 words

Louis hates vampires, he lives his life trying to kill as many as he can, night after night, year after year. He hates them. Then why the fuck is he kissing one? Again. “I mean it, Harry.” Louis says, into his mouth this time. “You need to get the fuck away from me.”

5) The Games We Play | Explicit | 23,488 words

Louis is a political lobbyist who chose his career over his personal life a long time ago and has never regretted it. Then he met Harry.

6) The Voice Of Range And Ruin | Explicit | 25,470 words

It seemed as if the freshly formed Omega Uprising had always been a step or two ahead of the Commandant and the rest of the reigning Alphanian officials. The idea had been floated that there must be someone working with them from the inside, reporting back to them on the government’s plans so that they could be prepared. That person had yet to be discovered, and the Commandant and his surrounding forces had finally had enough of this game of cat and mouse. Harry understood. He agreed. It needed to come to an end, one way or another. “Your job is to navigate their landscape and gain entry into their forces. You will pretend to be one of them and gain reliable intel for us. It’s clear that no one else has been capable of doing it, and you at least have some semblance of experience in this field. This has gone on for too long, Harry. Enough is enough.” He made direct eye contact with his son, holding it. “I’m counting on you.”

7) Now Is The Winter Of Our Discontent | Explicit | 28,832 words

Where Harry is leading an army to overthrow the king of Cheshire and Louis is one of the volunteers who joins them along the way.

8) You Fill My Lungs With Sweetness (Can I Be Close to You?) | Explicit | 29,884 words

Busy picturing Harry’s stupid face on the stupid dummy, Louis goes through a series of kicks before returning to a low guard and cycling through punches. Harry’s still talking, gesturing with his hands as he rounds Louis, standing to his back. “You do a few butt-shaping exercises, tighten this up a little bit,” he smacks Louis’ arse and the omega freezes while Harry cheerfully continues, “you could pull this off.” “You know what?” Louis snaps, lifting on his tiptoes to get the leverage so he can wrap his arm around the alpha’s neck, forcing him to bend in half while Louis locks him in a chokehold. “Pull this off,” he snarls. They stagger over a few steps, Louis gritting his teeth as Harry tries to break free. “Is it because Payne hates me?” he complains, voice edging on an annoyed whine, “Or is it, like, an omega thing?” Too late, Louis realizes that Harry has got a grip on his leg and this time as he pulls against Louis’ hold, it loosens, the alpha lifting him in the air before slamming his back into the mat, breaking Louis’ grip completely. Harry kneels on the mat, hovering over him with a sneer, “Don’t kid yourself. Nobody thinks of you that way.”

9) Just Let Me Adore You | Not Rated | 34,913 words

The one where Louis and Harry shouldn't make sense. Where Louis' past and Harry's present intermingle and no one is thinking straight.

10) Not Everything is So Primitive (Oh, but I’m Giving In) | Explicit | 35,809 words

“Okay, hold your bloody horses, I’m coming,” Niall rips open the door, freezing at the sight of Harry, bloody and disgruntled, standing on his doorstep, “What the hell happened to you?” “My husband,” Harry grumbles, pushing past Niall and walking into his entryway, “He tried to kill me,” Harry pauses, turning to Niall and grabbing his shoulders, “He tried to kill me with his fucking car.”

11) Burning Soul | Explicit | 39,513 words

Louis is a rogue Omega wolf, all he wants is a new start. Will he allow himself to fully embrace what awaits him, or will he run again, too damaged by past hurt?

12) Soaked In The Blood Of Angels | Explicit | 40,867 words

The boy looks drugged, caught between a man who’s almost twice his size and a girl who looks like she wouldn’t even break a sweat snapping him in half despite her small stature, eyes closed and mouth open as he pants, arching up between them almost as if he’s trying to escape. Normally, Harry would ignore it and continue on his search for someone to drink from, someone who wouldn’t mind his sharp teeth and rough hands. He’s seen plenty of boys like this one, ones who picked the wrong playmates, and if he stopped to rescue every single one of them he would have died from thirst a long time ago. This one, though. There’s something about this one, the sheen of his bright blue eyes as he blinks slowly, looks around as though he doesn’t know where he is, the weakness of his hands as he tries to push the girl off of him and make his escape.

13) No Easy Choice, But You're Mine | Explicit | 45,603 words

Louis is an omega hitman with one last job that goes a little sideways. Harry is the alpha bartender that looks a little too closely and cares a little too much.

14) Falling Without Caution | Explicit | 50,350 words

Louis Tomlinson, a wanted criminal, was captured by the FBI after years of chasing. Instead of being locked up in a high-security prison, he was offered a deal. What was supposed to be the end of a decade long chase turned into a morally grey circumstance for Agent Styles.

15) Let Your Damage, Damage Me | Explicit | 57077 words

A low and dangerous growl was ripped from the future King’s chest. “Who the fuck do you think you are?” the alpha snarled, eyes dark and nostrils flared. Even as anger rushed through him at the alpha’s brutish display, Louis felt breathless at the intense gaze of the man that was going to be his future mate. ‘Tomorrow I’m going to be under all that. He will be inside me, all muscles and rage.’ Louis felt his cheeks heat again, but refused to be cowed. So he put his best smirk on display, the one alphas despised to see, the one that assured them all he had the upper hand. “Thought you were expecting me, dear husband. I’m your future mate.”

16) Men of Steel, Men of Power | Explicit | 58,849 words

“You’ve been watching me,” Styles said. Louis swallowed around nothing. He tried for light. “You’re the newest addition, people are bound to be curious,” he said. “Sure,” said Styles, in a somewhat condescending tone. “I’m not that daft, I do notice the curiosity regarding my clothes. That’s not what you’re doing though, hm?” Styles’ gaze was intense, and Louis could feel it burn on the side of his face, but kept his eyes stubbornly on the coffee cup. “I,” he said, licked his lips. Took a deep breath, tried to look open, confident, dominant. Alpha.

17) Somethin' Bout You | Explicit | 59,855 words

Of all the government agents in the world, Louis had to go and land the most charming one.

18) The Face Of Love's Rage | Explicit | 67,421 words

“What if I tell you,” the princess said slowly, “I can get you five kingdoms and a lover?” Harry’s brows rose. “Only five?” he said mockingly. “And a lover. Don’t forget the lover.” “I have a lover.” “Do you?” the omega tilted her head, smiling, “I think right now, you have a consort, two friends, and a hostage. If you marry Julien, you will lose a friend and gain another hostage. Do you want him as a hostage or as a friend?” Harry’s temper was about to snap and break all hell loose. His hands itched to do something with the wild creature in front of him, with her untamed spirit that seemed to mock his authority and challenge his very presence. Abigail Tomlinson, with all her secrets and sins, defied not only his status, but everyone who dared to get in her way. Always making everyone aware that the only reason she was still there wasn’t because Harry let her, but because she wanted to be. Seven kingdoms, two sinners and one big secret.

19) Through Struggles, To The Stars | Explicit | 80,582 words

Louis is a Starfleet captain trying to find his place in the universe. Harry is a prince just trying to do what's right.

20) The Rose Of Whitechapel | Mature | 100,182 words

Jack the Ripper au - Detective Constable Harry Styles and his partner, DC Liam Payne, lead the case on the Whitechapel murders. Louis Tomlinson, the Rose of Whitechapel, is harbouring secrets of his own, along with a dark and sordid past. When their paths cross, truths are revealed, and perhaps hearts are mended... A darkness is brewing, and it's finally come to collect on the promise it was made.

21) Gloria Regali | Not Rated | 100,985 words

"I am very proud of you," Louis admitted, his eyes displaying his conviction, "you are very brave and ridiculously determined." Harry looked at him, as he shook his head, reaching out to his hand, he held it, "Trust me, it is not enough." "What makes you say that?" "Because if it was, you would have been married to me."

22) The Galaxy's Edge | Explicit | 113,921 words

In which Louis is a bounty hunter with a messed up past. Harry is a prince who just wants to prove himself. Niall and Zayn have too many things to figure out together. And Liam just wants to take care of his family. Things never quite go as they are planned during a simple rescue job.

23) Run Like the Devil | Explicit | 139,152 words

Note: This fic has mentions of BH.

Harry stops pouting, but his frown is still fixed in place. “Are you sure?” he asks. “You know it’s your soul you’re signing away.” He sounds…sad? No, that’s not right, but there’s something. Christ. This is the most incompetent demon Louis’ ever met. If he hadn’t seen the red of his eyes he wouldn’t believe he was a demon at all. How’d he get this job if he isn’t trying to convince Louis to deal? Or is it just another trick? A ploy for sympathy? “I’m sure,” Louis says. “Come over here and kiss me.”

24) Only You Can Be My Alpha | Mature | 212,387 words

In a world where one was either an Alpha or an Omega wolf, Louis found himself in a body that could be neither. Born an Omega without the expected characteristics of one, he felt broken, choosing to live as Alpha a lifestyle as he could. Harboring a serious lack of respect for Alphas and their authority complexes, Louis managed to get himself banished from his home, forced to wander the unforgiving woods for years, facing the elements and fighting enemy rogues each time they arose. Unbeknownst to Louis, in a tribe to the southwest of his home, there lived a dysfunctional Alpha, the orphaned pack leader Harry, who had never felt satisfied enough with anyone to settle down and continue his royal line. Living their lives apart thus far, the both of them assumed that they might be alone forever, making the best of things despite this even though it hurt. Chance, luck, or maybe fate brings Louis to this tribe when he’d least expected to receive kindness and shelter from a stranger, and when he arrives, something in his soul pulls him to Harry like a raging river current. The two don’t get off to a good start, but everyone around them can sense the chemistry—and in time they do too.

Check out our other fic rec lists by category here and by title here.

#bottom louis #top harry #larry #fic recs #blp #blp fic recs #badass louis

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a-local-idiots-shitpost · 1 year

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Mc is an actual Sheep

Full Title the would be to long: Mc is an actual Sheep not a Human turned in to a Sheep just instead of a Human those geniuses just choose a Sheep

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Lucifer:

he does not believe that you are a simple Sheep from the Human world

there is something menacing behind your eyes which does not belong to anything of Human origin

which is later proven because you keep trying to run him over just for fun

at least he doesn´t have to find someone to protect you

because you keep trying to fight Demons and for some reason they are really scared of some tiny pink Sheep

actually the answer is easy because you are a horrible menace and attack anyone that looks at you funny

but you do keep trying to cuddle with him when it´s cold

which does make him like you more and he is willing to forgive some of your actions

Mammon:

he immediately tries to use you to scam others

it did not work and ended up with Mammon getting run over by a bunch of Devil Sheeps

but you´re also a very talented Sheep because you still managed to get into a pact with Mammon

no one knows how you did it because you didn´t get Goldie

which was a lie you just refused to get it back and to get a pact you just ate his jackets and only stopped when he agreed

despite this somewhat rocky start both of you managed to be friends

he also uses you as a pillow on occasions

Leviathan:

he immediately taught you how to play games

and will be very surprised when you know how to play games

he will still call you a Normie:(

but everything is good because you came after his ankles and the only reason you stopped was because he hid somewhere higher up and you got bored

for some reason you still got through with the quiz despite you being a Sheep and not able to speak the Human language

for some reason you won without cheating

Levi lost immediately and got dragged around on the ground because his pants looked good enough to eat

Satan:

he loves you because he´s a menace towards Lucifer and you are a menace towards Lucifer which immediately makes him like you

you also tried to eat Lucifer´s clothes which also was something Satan liked

he wanted to make a pact with you to help in annoying Lucifer

and lost it when you said no

but only for a moment because you headbutted him somehow and he magically got knocked out

lucky for you he wasn´t angry at you for it and he allowed you to chill in his room

but you both are still menaces and ruin Lucifer live for fun

Asmodeus:

he tried to put a bunch of bows on you

and he got bitten

he pretty much kept his distance from you most of the time and your habit of eating clothes doesn´t help

either you would kill him when he get´s near you or if you somehow got your hooves on his wardrobe they would have lamb chops

after some time you just forgot why you wanted to kill Asmo and allowed to let him close without biting

and he fell just as quickly in love with you

since that day the only thing besides Asmo on his Devilgram is their weird Sheep and how cute/terrifying it is

Beelzebub:

he tried to eat you once and since than you were the one attempting to eat him and nearly succeeded multiple times

he tries to calm you down with different foods or other offerings

you don´t like him but you stopped trying to eat him, which is a good thing

but he did befriend you one day

he also feed you Demon ones, he thought you deserved to try it and it might cause you to hunt more Demons so the would leave you alone

needless to say Lucifer did not appreciate the fact that they now have a murderous Sheep that likes the taste of Demon

Belphegor:

he already knows what you are capable of and didn´t even try anything

but by the way you are watching him you know what he was planing

but maybe it was just because you tried to eat him

but no one believed him despite everything pointing towards the little Pink Sheep that already ate a Demon before

he isn´t scared enough of you to not use you a pillow though

and you´re really comfy so if it turns out you killed him in his sleep he can life with it

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ganondoodle · 5 months

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some ramblings about the overworld and reusing of the map in totk

i was one of the people that didnt mind revisiting the same map bc i loved the world and would gladly rexplore it all again, i was confident theyd change it up so it felt fresh again .. but it really wasnt, but even if it wasnt i was fine with it bc i was sure theyd HAD to use the build up from botw, with the shiekah and yiga alone theres so much you could do, and a captivating story or characters are more important than any map change to me-

and then, most changes on the surface were artificially stuck onto the world, like some small boulders the size of a large boulder stuck onto a wall, weirdly fusing with it (but thats not relevant and doesnt have a reason either) which really doesnt change anything much, some caves and holes in the ground but nothing really substantial at all, the most changed was death mountain and the gerudo city (while the regions themselves didnt really change either .. no in any interesting way at least to the extend i saw in my what 200+ hours)

im no game dev expert but do know a little and changing up a model and breaking stuff off really isnt THAT much to do so i really dont understand why they dotted the world with useless rocks and little caves that are all extremely similar instead, but then change stuff that is WEIRD to change and would have been easier to leave as it was- like the shrine of life being scraped of the walls, or smoothing over the places were shiekah towers were in botw like they never existed in the first place, and then sometimes adding something for no reason (like apparetly theres a new useless tiny ruin on the akkala fortress??? why?? how?? and i heard someone say they changed how the big hole in one of the peaks of the big mountains looked, like the icy blue texture was removed?? i dont know if i went there in my playthrough but i dont doubt it lol) and instead of the holes of the big shiekah tech pillars being left its just .. filled up with dirt, just like the bit of the calamity ganon arena being jsut rock now and the pit being fileld with just dirt as well-

and theres MORE changes that are arguably MORE time consuming to do but are both unnecessary to do and also WEIRD, erase everything shiekah and say it all vanished into thin air while theres clearly guardian parts in the new, shittier, towers and one decayed left at the hateno institue, the ancient furnace isnt just GONE its filled with rocks that had no way to get there naturally

but then the rest of the world is pretty much the same, with very little changes and if its plopped onto it without actualyl meaning anything, even inconvenience you too, like the path to hateno being blocked by a fortress of monsters so you cant get there via horse, and even if you clear them out, with or without the quest, they just come back with the bloodmoon, i thoguht if i do it with the quest theyd be gone for good and clear the path again, but NO you participating in the fight means nothing but another checkmark bc they will redo it over and over and it will be blocked again anyway (but then the "pirates" which are also a monster fortress .... dont come back ... waht) or the blockage of the bridge at the twin mountains too, you cant actually change anything, the one in the gerudo valley is also just another weird blockage, do you want to force me to build stuff? no thanks ill just walk then and be annoyed about it bc thats way easier

(sidenote, satori being reduced to someone pointing at caves that doesnt even tell you if you did them already or not is so disrespectful, i loved satori bc it wasnt some player helper but a strange and beautiful being, it jsut lived there and you had to be careful to even catch a glimps of it, the atmosphere around it being creepy and otherworldly you dont know what its really capable of, like you are staring at a godly being you cannot talk to but it accepts you when you are there and leaves as soon as you let go of it.... and nows its just a cave pointer...)

so, especially if you played botw, it all very much feels like a retread but with little sprinkles and weird changes (or outright annoying ones like the shrine of life being licked of the walls) here and there and othertimes just plain annoying inconveniences, and then the main points of your quest are .... in the same spot as in botw as well, its at rito village, death mountain, gerudo town, zoras village ... its repetition is entirely unnecessary, you had interesting locations all over the map, put a temple into or under akkala fortress my god that things i BUILD for that, anything in akkala really, put another one high into the mountains, in or UNDER hateno?? the krog forest or the deku tree being one?? kakariko??? no ?? it jsut had to affect each species exactly where they are .. again, and even the temples are there so its not even a thing made there affects the town nearest but still far away enough to be different or the terrain literally leveled the ground and they are gonna have to look to settle elsewhere (the closest is gerudo town but like ... is it), its not just repetetive but also makes the regions feel WAY more disconnected and self contained, none of them care about each other or do anything but defend against the thing that conveniently affects them directly at the same place again and the activities are largely the same too, find shrine find krog

ok then we got the sky, .. which is largely empty with just some repeating minibosses or some get crystal to there thing, its empty and barren of life, not a single NPC ever goes up into the sky aside from two dungeons companions, despite them already using the sonau tech ballooons and what not and having literal bird people there AND being literally obsessed with anything sonau, rarely theres a construct there, a robot with little to tell and not really doing anything, the ruins dont tell a story either, its just .. there

then theres the underground and omg its just as big as the overworld map! and then the .. terrain and look of it is almost always the same (only in the gerudo region is it a little more sandy) with the same kind of sonau thingies being the same everywhere that dont even LOOK ancient, it bothers me so much, are you telling me this building has been here for well over 10 THOUSAND YEARS?? and then the lightroots ... are in the same spot as the shrines .. so its not even a discovery really bc you know where shrine or root is now .. and then every more important place is literally beneath surface important places (even under taburasa .. the town you newly built in botw) which again .. isnt really a discovery then, and then the map itself is just the surface map but inverted, which to some may be a neat thing but, to me ... so its the surface AGAIN but more boring bc it doesnt have any regional differences too and then they have the gall to put the old amiibo stuff there (the labyrinths??? you go throguh all that and its just the renamed same armor from botws DLC??? how dare you), or some crystal things for your battery that are just another currency that has to be exchanged twice to specific people to be most useful- and the big weird magician statues ?? man idk if i should help this one, the giant mech like statue is giving me the creeps, and how the hell is it talking through the statues of thE GODDESS??? HUH´? and then it turns out its just a guys that sells you largely useless stuff for yet another currency you can only use at few specific spots

even the enemies are the same aside from mini- and gigamas, it even repeats the enemies from the surface

the best part of the underground/surface are the yiga, and even they are made kinda boring, in the underground its little outposts that give you some crystal currency and blueprints for autobuild i bet you arent ever gonna use, the most valuable thing is their little diaries and on the bigger spots koga (he is surperior to every single other character, sorry gan) but even kogas questline is like .. removed from everything else, its its own contained thing ocne again ... the arenas that are kinda fun to do but ultimately

you have a barely changed map from botw, a largely empty sky with some rather boring shrines or minibosses that get used over and over and no story to tell really, and then the entire map of the surface again with important points and shrine points being repeated as well

and then you get option over option to skip any traversal of all that too, with ultrahand and the towers and the ceiling jump and fast travel its a repetetive map twice and one largely empty with out skipping from point a to point b

i know how difficult game dev is, but in all those years with a giant team and money this is it? and not even the story has anything to go for? how do you take the addictive exploration of botw and turn it boring

anyway, yet another ramble taking me the entire evenign to write, again, this is not meant as blind hatred but an expression of my feelings and thoughts about it and for this one why it felt so weird and boring to explore ... the thing i like so much about botw ..

#ganondoodles talks #zelda #totk #ganondoodles rants #idk i suddendly thought about more stuff to rant about #sorry to do this so much and so long #i wanna move one for now and work on my comic again #... how did this take me two hours to write #also please i know i talk alot about it but theres so much to rant about #that i will never understand how they came up with doing it like this #when there were so many options to do it better #to go out of your way to make something less interesting???huh??

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capricornlevi · 1 year

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Atsumu: you’ll be fine samu, ya big baby Atsumu: she’ll say yes obviously Atsumu: just don’t fuck up the speech

Osamu reads the last text over and over again until the words are nearly burnt into his retinas.

Oh, shit.

Oh shit shit shit, Osamu hadn’t even considered the speech. He hadn’t so much as made a rough draft.

That’s one way to ensure his composure gets completely and utterly shot to hell: a reminder that he’s forgotten what is arguably the most important element of a proposal.

He thought he had all the bases covered – this took several months of planning, after all. He had found the perfect ring, came up with an excuse to have you out of the apartment all morning so he could prepare, subtly persuaded you to book tomorrow off work so you can celebrate properly this evening.

He had also made sure to glare at Atsumu every time you all hung out together so as to remind him to keep his stupid mouth shut.

Osamu had also bought roses to decorate your shared apartment – a bit cheesy for both of your tastes, but when will you have another excuse to cover every surface of your living room with some obscenely expensive flower petals? Not only that, but he had a bottle of champagne on ice as well, along with a jug of peach juice in the fridge to make those cocktails you like so much.

And so this morning he had waved you off to brunch with your college friends with a self-satisfied smile, marvelling at how perfectly this entire thing had worked out. He’s the only Miya capable of conjuring up a semi-convincing poker face so he was certain you didn’t suspect a thing.

It was all perfect.

Until about thirty seconds ago, that is, when ‘Tsumu had to go and ruin fucking everything. Now Osamu feels himself spiraling towards panic, unable to identify a single articulate thought, much less the words he’ll say when he gets down on one knee.

Another text buzzes through. The ring box suddenly feels as though it weighs a tonne, burning a hole in Osamu’s pocket.

He checks the text with a grimace on his face.

Atsumu: good luck to ya both. she’ll need it <3

Osamu sighs as he types up a reply.

Osamu: thanks, dumbass

He locks his phone and sets it down on the counter.

He had never been great with words; Atsumu was the talker, not him. Sure, his brother could be annoying as shit, but he could also spin together some well-thought-through pickup lines that guaranteed him a date every weekend throughout college.

Osamu, on the other hand, had never really cared for eloquence. He had always made his way through life using more practical methods, relying on other things, tangible things, all of which had been instrumental in winning you over. It wasn’t with flowery language or poetry, no — he had charmed his way into your life through his genuine nature, considerate actions, and the effort he puts into your relationship. That’s what matters to him.

But while that’s all well and good, he still has to reckon with the fact that this is a proposal, and even though you didn’t fall in love with a poet, you’re likely expecting something that expresses his feelings for you.

That’s what’s eating away at Osamu more than anything else: it’s not that he doesn’t feel these things, because he does. God, he does.

He finally gets all those soppy proposal speeches in the movies, those cheesy sonnets you sometimes read on the front of Valentine’s cards. Every room he’s in, he’s aware of your presence. He seeks you out when you’re not by his side. He has memorised every single detail of your face, your laugh, all your quirks and traits that he’s so achingly fond of.

He just doesn’t know how to say it aloud, to do it justice.

The door handle turns and Osamu’s heart leaps in his chest.

Shit. Does he get on one knee now? Does he wait for you to come in first?

What if you say no?

The door opens and you walk through, oblivious to the romantic decor in your apartment as you shrug off your jacket to hang on the coat rack. There’s a faint smile on your face as you toss your keys on the dresser by the entryway.

You turn around to see Osamu standing there in the centre of the living room.

His eyes widen as if he wasn’t expecting you, and then he slowly gets down on one knee.

As he fishes around in his pocket for something, you see his hands shake. He swallows thickly as pulls out the ring box.

You blurt out a delighted “yes!” before a single word even leaves his mouth.

A beat of silence passes, the ‘yes’ almost reverberating around the room as both of you process the weight of it.

Osamu’s eyes widen even further and then he barks out a laugh, loud and full of relief, his hands still trembling.

“I didn’t even get ta say my piece,” he objects half-heartedly, the breathlessness with which he says it tells you that he wasn’t too set on giving a speech in the first place. “Don’t ya need any convincing?”

You shake your head, closing the distance between the two of you. “No convincing needed.”

The smile on his face looks like it hurts. He’s still on one knee but is far more relaxed now, shoulders having released their tension, some colour returning to his cheeks.

“Can I at least ask ya anyway?” he points out with a shrug. “Just ta make it official, y’know?”

You’re next to him now and he takes one of your hands in his free one. The ring sparkles in the light from the room around you but you don’t notice it; not with Osamu looking at you like that, like you’re the centre of his entire universe no matter what you say or do.

And you owe him an answer.

“Yes, you can ask,” you whisper, delight leeching into every syllable.

He takes in one deep breath, eyes fixed on your face now as though it’s a calming force.

“Will ya marry me?”

“Yes,” you repeat, voice clear as you can make it, before he gets to his feet and you’re wrapped in his arms.

You already know what he was going to say in his speech — he tells it to you through his actions, and the way he looks at you. He tells it to you along every step of this life you’ve built together.

So you thought it best to save him the trouble of saying it, and just answer the easiest question you’ve ever been asked.

“Yes.”

#osamu x reader #miya osamu x reader #miya osamu #osamu miya x reader #timeskip osamu miya x reader #happy valentines my loves <3 #may tries to write #this is so cheesy dont look at me </3

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yanderemommabean · 1 year

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Last post got be thinking about that silly trope where a hitman/assassin/murderer has to suddenly take care of a kid and all the shenanigans involved with trying to be nice/preserve their innocence despite the fact that they... You know... Kill people for a living.

Anyway thoughts about OCs and suddenly having to take care of a kid?

it's been on my mind, I had to make a small post to feed the worms eating my brain.

I think Jasper would be trying to preserve any innocence he could, he loves kids, he wants the world to be good for them for as long as possible. His childhood was ruined early but that doesn't mean he wants anyone else's to be broken apart either.

Lee would have tired dad energy the entire time, but he'd still love them and be sure they're safe and eating correctly. "Do your work yet? Did you brush your teeth and shower? Alright then, come here, let me show you some neat science experiments"

Grey would be a bit awkward, as he's terrified he might accidentally hurt them, he doesn't want to turn out like the family he barely remembers. So he'll chill with them, play games, try to be a good role model, but he feels like someone else would be better qualified

Dexter would be over the moon and wouldn't be capable of leaving them alone. He's always so proud of anything they make, if its a stick drawing he says it's better than Vincent and Picasso. Major Proud Dad Energy

Ezrol would be indifferent in the beginning. Annoyed and not wanting anything to do with the brat. But slowly he lets his heart melt and starts giving into small things such as silly cartoons or weird art projects they wanted to try. He acts like he threw away the "junk" but it's very clearly kept in his room on his dresser or wall. Always checks in on them as they grow up, wanting to cry like an actual parent as time passes because "They grow up so fast"

August is the cookie cutter perfect dad who makes sure to use manners, be polite, be kind, and clean up. He'll have his more strict moments sometimes, but he's a real loving father figure who wants to be sure the kid is happy healthy and knows they're safe and loved no matter what. Also a really good cook at BBQs. Wears the "best dad" aprons all the time.

CEO would be the spoiling type, but only after you've earned it so to speak. If you do your work you'll be rewarded. Might also really love wearing the dad outfits they pick out to match. I'm talking atrociously colored and doesn't even match but it's their outfit choice for him, so to him it's a great fashion statement.

Victoria is used to handing care off to nanny's and what not, but she'd try. She's so business oriented the CEO would love to hire her. she's a more strict mother figure, but it's so the kid can get ahead in life when they can. Thinks kids are gross personally but isn't going to be a bitch if asked to house and care for one, she'll just take a while to warm up and be a good influence is all.

-Mommabean

#jasper my oc #dr lee my oc #doctor lee my oc #dexter my oc #grey my oc #ezrol my oc #August my oc #victoria my oc #yandere CEO #my ocs #yandere scenarios #yandere imagines

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zodiactalks · 2 months

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Zodiac Signs and Their TOXIC Traits

No matter our Zodiac sign, we're all human and, as such, we're all likely to make mistakes that can hurt us or others.

However, some signs are more prone to making mistakes than others, and these negative and toxic qualities can affect them in very unique ways.

Today, we're tackling each Zodiac sign's more toxic trait:

Aries

There's no sign more impatient than Aries.

Arians are always rushing, always eager to get from point A to point B as efficiently and quickly as possible, without ever stopping to smell the flowers.

What's worse, they're known for making choices without considering the possible outcomes first, which often ends up landing them in hot water.

Taurus

There's no sign more resentful than Taurus.

Taurus are known for being grounded and slow to change, and while that can have its advantages, it also means that Taurus can hold a grudge for a long time.

Taurus finds it hard to forgive and to forget, which is far more likely to hurt them than to hurt others.

Gemini

There's no sign more indecisive than Gemini.

Geminis are overthinkers by excellence and will change their minds at the drop of a hat, which is not only annoying but a huge disadvantage in Gemini's life.

Overthinking and changing their mind make them miss out on amazing opportunities regularly.

Cancer

There's no sign more conformist than Cancer.

Cancers love to live in their comfort zone, no matter how disadvantageous or miserly it might be.

They're terrified of setting out for greener pastures and would rather sit still and let life pass them by, than risk their comfort to pursue something better.

Leo

There's no sign more egotistical than Leo.

Leos are genuinely convinced that everything is about them and will make choices and decisions based on that.

While it might not affect them negatively at first, it's not uncommon for Leo to realize they're all alone when they finally look away from themselves.

Virgo

There's no sign more perfectionist than Virgo.

Virgos have unrealistically high expectations for themselves and for others, which keeps them from feeling satisfied with the world they live in.

It also harbors resentment on others, as nothing they'll ever do will meet the expectations Virgos have for them.

Libra

There's no sign more pandering than Libra.

Libras always try their hardest to make everyone happy, convinced that if they can please others, they'll be well-liked and love.

While there's nothing wrong with wanting to be liked, it can be easy to take advantage of Libra's obsequious nature, and feeling upset when someone doesn't like you is simply torturing oneself.

Scorpio

There's no sign who covets more than Scorpio.

Ambition can be a positive thing, but Scorpio takes it to a whole new level, dedicating their life to acquiring that which they covet without once stopping to think about the consequences of their own actions.

This one-track mind may get them where they need to be, but they'll burn a lot of bridges getting there unless they make an effort to be considerate of others.

Sagittarius

There's no one more competitive than Sagittarius.

Sagittarians are capable of turning anything into a competition and they often will, even if it means ruining a perfectly good moment and annoying others just so they can feel like they won at something.

What's worse, Sagittarians are also well-known for competing against themselves, always looking to be better than they already are, which, if left unchecked, can make them feel like they're not good enough no matter what they do.

Capricorn

There's no sign more controlling than Capricorn.

This doesn't mean that Capricorn wants to take over the world, but rather that Capricorn believes that if they can be fully in control of this thing or that thing in their life, they'll be able to be safe and happy.

The problem, of course, is that no one can be fully in control of every aspect of their lives, and attempting to is more likely to frustrate Capricorn than anything else.

Aquarius

There's no sign more judgmental than Aquarius.

Aquarians think of themselves as the more objective person out there, which is not only objectively wrong but also the reason why Aquarians are so judgmental.

Since they think they're the ones in the right, they often look down on others and their choices, when in reality they'd be much better off if they tried to empathize with other's actions and rationales.

Pisces

There's no one more sensitive than Pisces.

While there's nothing wrong about being a little sensitive about something or another, Pisces feel everything too deeply, to the point that they'll feel insulted or sad about something that doesn't even involve them.

Taking a cause is a positive thing, allowing yourself to be hurt by every little negative thing that happens around you, isn't.

#Zodiac #Zodiac Signs #Zodiacs #zodiac facts #zodiacsign #astrology #astrology signs #Aries #Aquarius #Cancer #Capricorn #leo #libra #Gemini #virgo #Pisces #Sagittarius #taurus #scorpio

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imagine-knb · 3 months

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saw the ask box is empty!!!!!!! How about hyuga, kasamatsu, otsubo, imayoshi, hanamiya, okamura, akashi, nijimura planning an elaborate date but then receives a call from their crying partner that they can't come because of a work emergency?

There are many definitions of 'work emergency', so I'm choosing to define it as 'mandatory overtime'. Let me know if you meant it as in like, an actually dangerous emergency! Admin Neon

Hyuuga: "Hah? Seriously? They couldn't have the issue wait until tomorrow or something?"

Hyuuga is more annoyed with your employer than he is with you, blaming your work emergency on their lack of appropriate scheduling. He tells you something along the lines of having your boss pay for the missed reservations the two of you have, his tone only half joking.

Kasamatsu: "Well, that sucks, but it can't be helped I guess... Do your best."

There's a slight sulking tone to his voice when you tell him that the reservations for the night will have to be rescheduled, but Kasamatsu is pretty good at hiding his disappointment. Still, it's hard to find free time between the two of you, so he starts wracking his brain for days he can take off instead to make things easier.

Imayoshi: "Hmm? Are you sure you can't just sneak away and come home already?"

He's teasing, of course, as he makes this suggestion to you. Imayoshi would never seriously ask you to jeopardize your job for a date, when he could easily reschedule things. Expect him to tease you further about it once you get home however, as he'll pretend to be extra clingy after you 'chose work over him'.

Otsubo: "There will always be another day for us to spend together, I promise you."

He sounds completely understanding over the phone, knowing that situations like this were rare, so it wasn't terrible for him to have to reschedule things. After cancelling all of the plans, Otsubo actually takes some time to make things cozier for you at home, knowing you'll be tired after an extra long, stressful day.

Okamura: "Don't worry about it, baby! I'll take care of everything! You get back to work."

He doesn't want you to feel like you've ruined any special plans, so Okamura is quick to reroute everything. He'd seen it in a movie once and decides to move all of your plans to in the home instead, setting up what he thinks is a rather romantic atmosphere right there in your very living room.

Akashi: "The faster you get it all done, the faster we can continue with our plans. I believe in you, love."

He's rather supportive when you call him about the work emergency, reassuring you that both you and your team are fully capable of handling the situation. While he calms you down, Akashi is already messaging the relevant people to have your plans rescheduled for a later time.

Nijimura: "Well, it can't be helped, can it? Just hurry up, so we can plan for our rescheduled date."

Though he's disappointed, Nijimura knows that sometimes things like this can happen when you work for the corporate world. He spends the rest of the evening cancelling all the plans the two of you had made. He doesn't want to reschedule them until the two of you can decide on a day.

Hanamiya: "What? Are you serious? Just tell them you can't and come home already."

To say he's more than annoyed would be an understatement, but despite how aggravated Hanamiya sounds over the phone, he knows you're not the type to just up and abandon your job. You can hear in his voice that he's grumbling when he finally relents and tells you it's fine.

#hyuuga #kasamatsu #otsubo #imayoshi #hanamiya #okamura #akashi #nijimura

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javomelancholie · 3 months

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I have a confession and I want to complain a bit:

I just don't understand ppl in genshin fandom.

Albedo is going through character development ONLY because of Lumine.

He is deeply in love with her and isn't interested in anyone else. And there are good reasons for that. Albedo is seeing in Lumine a kindred spirit. He clearly feels the most comfortable only with her and trusts her more than others quite explicitly. Because Albedo, who doesn't think he belongs with everyone cause he's "different", feels a sense of familiarity with Lumine who is just like him. Because Albedo is interested in essence of life/self-improvement and learning more about the world. Albedo compared himself to a rose and called Lumine his gardener in the event "Shadows Amidst Snowstorms". You know why? Because a rose signifies change and blossoming of the human soul. Albedo's comparison of himself to a rose is understandable: after all, it was after meeting Lumine that his soul began to open up to her and the world around him. He now has a person (Lumine) in his life to whom he can reveal everything without fearing of being ostracized and with whom he can be himself. With Lumine he is feeling full and spirit fulfilled. He suggested for Lumine to live with him on Dragonspine. He literally wants to marry her.

Just look how he is smiling from the bottom of his heart:

(If you don't understand the difference between real Albedo and his clones, here's a quick summary:

Albedo: can be annoyed (1.2), likes to tease Lumine (1.2), a kind brother to Klee (1.6), thinks the game shouldn't be ruined, let people discover the warm surprise (1.6), can smile satisfiedly (1.6), can praising wholeheartedly (1.6), wants Lumine with whom he wants to spend time with to give her time for him (1.6), can't take care of himself well, need to be reminded (1.6), care for surroundings (2.3), ready to protect the people he cares about, very cool person (2.3), can feel sad (2.3), has sympathy and empathy (2.3), can be aggressive (2.3), can smile from the bottom of his heart (2.3), isn't trying to become human, because he IS human and he knows it (2.3), has mature and big heart (2.3)

Imposters (no. 2 & 3/ his clones): doesn't have a human body, lacking of emotion, has that cold and emotionless sensation, has high intelligence but still lack of responding by speak or act, don't have sympathy for their surroundings, yearning for life to blend with humans, attached to the dark feelings of being discarded as a failed one/not human being)

And ppl are just...completely ignoring that his character development is happening ONLY because of Lumine and that he`s in love with her??? These two important aspects of his personality??

I especially find it devastating if such ppl are calling themselves "Albedo's fans".

??????

Many Lumine's players also like to completely ignore his existence for some reason while Albedo is actually canonically the most otome coded character and is the most forward towards her.

His every interaction with Lumine???

His teapot lines???

His birthday letters???

Hello???????

Lumine is intelligent and observing person and she and Albedo understand each other perfectly.

And I like how even other characters in game are admitting that.

(so please stop projecting your own misunderstanding of a character onto Lumine because YOU don`t (want to) understand Albedo)

But sure, Albedo is just a "boring dude from the mountains, who only cares about science, likes to talk about "difficult" things and doesn't understand human emotions".

(also can some ppl please stop using Albedo as some annoying third wheel in their ships?)

Albedo is a cool, smart and capable character and suppressing what we think of him.

He deserves better than this.

#genshin impact #albelumi #albedo #lumine #otp #may albedo get a better fandom pls #it feels nice to blow off steam from time to time

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starpirateee · 27 days

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i have perpetually ruined myself with this silly headcanon:

and obviously i had to go annoy my friend @scripted-downfall about it, in bullet point form, to a response that looked a little bit like this:

i don't take much tempting, y'all should know that... so now, here i am, writing this in something that isn't bullet points :)

Owen promised himself that he could take the pain, that surviving a fall like that meant that he could survive anything. But every day was exactly the same, and every day, he forced himself to deal with the blinding headache, and the tremors, and the fact that nothing felt right, but there was nothing he could do about it.

His head pounded in time with his heart, only this was deeper and louder and more poignant. A fair and well justified concussion was what they'd said, and it was going to take some shaking. It had left him with a patchy memory that he could barely trust to support him, and— perhaps the worst of all— the worst pattern of speech in his known history. Where he was once confident and eloquent, there remained something broken, laced in uncertainty and all the pain he felt elsewhere.

It had been a good week and a half since the first time he'd woken up, convinced he should be long dead but breathing all the same, and it had been relatively normal, all things considered. Quiet on the outside of his mind, with enough space to get himself in gear...

And the shadow.

When everything else was blurry and wildly out of focus, so was the shadow. Owen didn't know what to make of it at first, though he'd established that he was looking at and sharing a space with a man. Ghosts weren't among the things he'd been inclined to believe in, but now he had to wonder whether this was worth changing his entire belief system.

It was entirely possible that someone had died here, of that he had no doubt. Was that the problem? Was this the vision of the last man to have died in this room?

Nine days in, and he was forcing himself to admit that, in his current state, he couldn't help but to fear the presence seemingly haunting him whenever it saw fit. It was never consistent, and he couldn't blame it on something like the movement of the sun, since most of the time, it was in the darkness when it decided to show face.

Formless and unknowable, he could take. He had grown to at least acquaint himself with the idea that he may be haunted by some poor soul that had long since departed from the world. For some reason, that was okay by him. The ghost didn't seem capable of harming him, and scarcely so much as made his presence known.

He could live with that.

It was significantly harder to live with it when his vision cleared and he started to be able to make out features. Dark hair, styled and straightened. A strong jaw. Eyes that caught the light and sparkled.

At first, it had been a coincidence. A lot of men had that style and those eyes... But whatever coincidence this was stopped being so the first time the shadow moved.

Owen watched it approach, slow and seemingly methodical. He was pacing, but the direction wasn't planned. There was something about the slacks paired with that bomber jacket that just screamed recognisable. And Owen knew exactly why.

The shadow has a familiar frame, and a familiar height, and a familiar smirk that was seconds away from giving into a familiar smirk. Owen knew his name. He also knew that it wasn't a ghost at all.

He breathed. He didn't want to believe what he was seeing, but how could he deny it? That shadow had been in his presence for days now, he had basically invited him to stay by being so unfazed. It was different now he knew what he was dealing with.

"... Curt?"

That was the first coherent thing he'd forced out of himself in days, and he knew it well. Of course it was. It was almost poetic that his mind knew the shape of Curt's name so well that he was able to break his own stammer through it's familiarity.

There was no way.

Curt wasn't dead.

He blinked, but nothing changed. Curt was still there, illuminating the space ever so slightly. Owen didn't even stop to think about the fact that his headache had been momentarily relieved, ever so slightly, upon seeing him.

Desperate to know, or to understand what was going on, he scrubbed at his eyes, trying for all it was worth to clear his vision, or to clear the longing that resided in the back of his mind. If Curt was still there, then there was a good chance he was just losing his mind. Already? At this early stage?

It was worse when he opened his eyes and Curt was no longer there. His breath caught in his throat, and he absently checked the entire perimeter of the space, just to really sell the fact that he was gone. Surely it wasn't that easy... Surely the hallucinations hadn't already set in...

Whichever vision he'd been periodically having of a man who turned out to be Curt had vanished. He was alone.

His hand fell just in time to catch the first sob before the sound could escape him. Alone was so much more terrifying when he realised that even his mind couldn't be trusted to keep him in line

#spies are forever #saf #owen carvour #agent curt mega #void offering #nova's tags →#:) sad headcanons only around here /hj #i think i mentioned it in the post fall catetaking #and yeah it's been in the back of my mind ever since #what if he saw curt huh #like. what if...#he already can't trust his concussive mind but god only knows curt makes the headache a little better #oh yeah and this is the first thing that has actually ventured into drabble territory in...#a long time #i am known to get carried away but this is more inpactful shorter

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all-pacas · 4 months

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bg3 characters ranked by how awful i think they'd be to live with

HALSIN: Incredible. Helps out around the house, brings up any concerns in a helpful way, gardens, rescues animals. Probably not always the best at "general communication." Like he'll just go out for groceries, runs into someone he knows, they're on their way to a meeting about cleaning up a recent oil spill, of course he'd love to tag along, and then it's been four hours and you're still waiting for him to come home with eggs?

JAHEIRA: Takes care of things, Very Much expects you to do the same and will not tolerate laziness. Doesn't think to fill you in on every aspect of her life, and doesn't expect that from you. Absolutely not clingy. A surprisingly soft touch. She will come home with a new pet or child and not take no for an answer. In fact, she'll be pissed as hell with you if you suggest you can't foster a new kid.

WYLL: Considerate, good natured, great as a roommate or as a partner. I get the vibe he'd be a little scattered, though. Like, he's not always gonna be 100% up to date on the chores, he leaves his laundry to pile up. He's an okay but not fantastic cook. He's definitely accidentally ruined a pan or two. Doesn't want to "bother" you if he's in a bad mood or troubled or upset, but probably also isn't as subtle as he thinks he is, leading to some stomping around and "I said I am FINE" annoyances, but he always gets over himself sooner rather than later. Always wants to Engage: you can't just both be sitting and doing your own thing; he wants to talk and check in.

SHADOWHEART: Absolutely Competent. Takes care of her shit and assumes you will take care of yours. Is probably the type to wash her dishes and leave yours to rot. Is capable of great passive-aggressiveness. That said, is friendly and perfectly cool with existing independently. Likes cuddling on the sofa, but only sometimes or for a little while.

KARLACH: Enthusiastic but messy. She does not keep on top of things. She cannot cook. Gives everything 120%, overwaters all the plants into oblivion. Most likely to sleep on a mattress on the floor instead of buying a bedframe. Almost always in a good mood; the times she isn't she gets over it fast. A little clingy. Has trouble letting you read or watch TV in peace, she always wants to chat or hang or sing to herself. No quiet in this house.

GALE: On the one hand, a fantastic cook. He will make sure you are always well fed. He can entertain himself, and is perfectly happy to be left alone with his books. On the other hand, every meal probably uses half the bowls and pots and pans in the house, and he does not clean. Piles of Stuff everywhere. Will go on research binges and forget the world exists. Is always super considerate and happy to pitch in, but you WILL need to remind him. Every single time. He's both wonderful and super annoying to live with.

LAE'ZEL: Bossy. Wants things just so, and you WILL do what she says. No compromises, no debate. Her standards are pretty reasonable (although she does seem like she's probably a clean freak), it's just that you have no say in it. Not a good cook. Big on Health Food/Food is Fuel.

MINSC: You're gonna parent this man. He is always good humored and cheerful and eager, but you are gonna have to remind him what to do constantly. Probably surprisingly diligent about one thing. Like he ALWAYS does laundry daily and perfectly, something like that. But putting it away? Cooking? Cleaning? Whomst?

ASTARION: Fully expects you are going to clean and tend house for him. Doesn't eat food and doesn't see the point in buying or preparing it. Has exacting standards he will not at all help maintain. Feels that the pleasure of his companionship is more than enough reward for your services. Will probably happily buy you clothes and keep you well dressed, but his tastes are incredibly gaudy so is that really a win?

#bg3 headcanons

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mehiwilldoitlater · 9 months

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Hello! Do you have any headcannons for the horsemen taking care of a female y/n on their period? Congrats on the 800 followers! :)

WOW, i haven't received anything Darksiders related in a long time!

Death:

Everyone is used to the fact that death is quite capable of everything, but in my opinion, in this matter, he's quite ignorant. It's hard to say if Nephilim were able to reproduce or if they worked just like us, so you can imagine that the first time he saw you bleeding, he almost believed that he wasn't able to protect you against an attack. Then, imagine his disbelief when your only response to that was an annoyed sigh and a whispered "great, that's all I need now". Despite this, he's fast at catching what perios is, why it's happening, and all that. And surprisingly, he's quite good at taking care of it and finding more natural solutions to it—or at least he knows who to ask for help from. Do you need help with period pain? Muira has to know a few herbs that can help you heal the pain. Do you need to relieve some stress? Let's go and try some combat skills with Draven! Your muscles are stiff, and the only thing you want is to relax. Let's try a hot spring. He knew just the right place.

War:

The first time he caught you leaking blood was in your sleep. His sense of smell is quite good, especially with you, and he almost had a panic attack once he found your nether regions covered in your own blood. Once he calmed down (you had to calm him down), you explained to him what a period is, that your race had taken care of it from the beginning, and that it's not lethal. After this explanation, he starts to believe that human women are on a totally different level. Not only are they forced to live with this condition, but some of them are even capable of facing the pain of it! Phisycall and mentally! Unfortunately, he's not an expert in these matters, but he will try everything to ease your pain or help you with it. He'll ask Vulgrim about something that can ease your cramps or make you ride Ruin so it doesn't stress you too much. In your private moments, he'll shield you himself, letting the heat from his body ease your poor muscles.

Fury:

If you think that you can gain some female sympathy from Fury, darling, you're wrong. Not only is she completely ignorant of what a period is, she'll dismiss any possible attempts by you to explain yourself! Are you bleeding? Are you hurt? No? Good, then do not complain too much; we have a mission. Seriously, the only one here who shows some kind of nicety to you is the watcher, but even she is unaware of what is happening in your body. Only after you have collapsed from the pain of the cramps and given a good shout to the horseman will Fury start to consider your condition. The female humans in Ulthane's care will share with you a few of the medicines that they were able to get and give you some spare pants, but after that, finally, Fury will start questioning you about this thing. As I said, she's ignorant about it, but she's fast to learn. Not only that, but she'll start questioning you about your condition, asking you if it's going to happen again. Imagine her relief after knowing that it's a thing that happens once a month.

Strife:

"...How many times?" "Once in a month, around every 28 days." "Ah... and it's painful?" "Well, by human standards, it is almost bearable, but some others suffer quite a lot from it..." "...Seriously, what have you done to make the creator so angry to give you something so horrifying?"

Honestly, Strife's first impression of the human period was a huge WTF? Why?! Why the hell are human women supposed to face that? Why was it supposed to start when you were so young? And why was he not informed about it? He's confused, a little disgusted, and...impressed? No, seriously, you all are taking care of it like pros; you even joke about it! It's not surprising that your pain threshold was so high! After that, he'll become your period knight! He'll carry you like the queen that you are! Providing you with all the requests that you ask of him! Chocolate? Got it, chips? Let's go. Pineapple pizza? A painful experience, but he'll face it for you. No matter how many times you try to convince him that you don't need that treatment, he won't back down!

#darksiders #darksiders death #darksiders war #darksiders fury #darksiders strife

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a-local-idiots-shitpost · 2 years

Text

Elder God Mc

Lucifer:

of course Diavolo starts a exchange program to unite the 3 Realms and instead of choosing a second human exchange student

they somehow managed to acquire and Elder God in a human disguise

just his luck

you seem to be well behaved enough I mean you are still a headache and massive pain in his butt but considering what you are capable of rather you are rather tame

he enjoys using your true form as a form of punishment and torture for his brothers (it will get less effective the more they´ll love you)

he also likes that you can take Cerberus for a walk and he doesn´t have to worry about him running away

Mammon:

he thinks you are a normal human he is supposed to look after (his actual role is making sure you don´t destroy the Devildom but he doesn´t know that)

the first time he sees your true form he is ready to die from fear and is surprised when you let him live (he will always be slightly terrified of your true form)

he will use you to get out of his debt someone wants collect money from him? “sure I have the money! Just stay a moment with my human” and this is your queue to reveal your true form

safe to say it works every time

he only get´s to do it once a month otherwise you would scare him

Leviathan:

he´s concerned for a minute but then he remembers the anime he recently watched named “me & my brothers were supposed to look after a human but it´s actually an eldritch horror and I fell in love with them”

he will try to watch it with you but you constantly decline

he would also take advantage of you not being a human but it´s mostly helping him win tickets & getting him rare figurines

for some reason Lotan can´t be summoned when you are nearby wonder why? maybe something nearby terrifies Lotan? guess we will never know :)

Satan:

okay I´m just going to say what we´re all thinking

when is he going to ask Mc to turn in to a cat? don´t worry! After learning they aren´t a human he will constantly pester them

depending on your age (or universe of origin) will ask you about that happened before he was his own being or what your home was like

he will also use you to annoy Lucifer

the worst thing he talked you in to was eating a part of Diavolo´s castle

Diavolo and Barbatos weren´t really that mad which was a surprise

Lucifer though… Satan thought he would explode from anger

Asmodeus:

he hates seeing you in your true form

not because he thinks you look ugly or he´s scared no something far worse

he can´t even give you a make over

either you eat the clothes he gives you or absorb the make-up!

How can he make you the second most stunning person in the world when you don´t even cooperate!

he can´t even use your stunning photos because everyone is being rude and calling you a terrifying monster

how rude of them! some Demons just don´t have taste wouldn´t you agree Mc?

Beelzebub:

he´s honestly afraid that something exists with a bigger appetite then him

Beel just emptied and entire restaurant? you just ate an Island

but you also rarely eat which concerns Beel

and no matter how many times you try and tell him no you aren´t hungry and yes you haven´t eaten in a hundred years but this is normal and it is actually abnormal that you have to eat at all

that you could have the ability to not eat at all is somehow worse for Beel than the fact you could easily devour entire landmasses

Belphegor:

will you keep him awake? cause him nightmares? if no he doesn´t care

he was actually surprised to find out you aren´t a human

just like Satan he will use you to annoy Lucifer

but unlike Satan he usually has ideas which just mean he can sleep longer

oh? Mc somehow covered the entire doorway and no one can get inside or outside without their “flesh” dissolving them? guess Belphie can sleep in today

Lucifer was actually tempted to destroy the walls so he can get to Belphie because not only is he skipping school but also causing Mc to skip school

and he can´t let that happen because Mc has multiple tests today and if they miss them it will ruin their grade and might let the exchange program look bad

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star-vibing-prompts · 9 months

Text

Random quotes from different Fandoms as prompts.

Yes you can use these. Yes you can change the pronouns. Also NOTE: None of these are in particular order.

Warnings: Mentions of drugs, swearing, a very long post, and maybe yandere stuff??

"I hope he didn't care about that pizza..."

"[Name], have you seen [Name] this morning?" "Yeap. He's hanging out with some weirdo. I think he's trying to vaporize [Name]."

"[Name], I blame YOU for this." "Eh, that's fair."

"Also, I cleaned up your awful, awful mess. You’re welcome." "You did WHAT?! I have a system!"

"I never asked for it to be this way. I never asked to be made!"

"Admit it. I'm just an embarrassment to you!"

"I'm not gonna let you stand there and remind me of everything I hate about myself!"

"How will StarClan come back if we keep breaking the code?"

"I really-really-like you. I've always felt that we might be mates one someday. And now that I'm a warrior, maybe this is the time for us to start thinking of each other in a new way?" "I'm sorry. I had no idea you felt like this, [Name]. I like you a lot, but I always thought of you as a friend-a really good friend, almost like another littermate. I've never felt...that way about you." "But now that you know how I feel...do you think that in time, [Name] you might feel the same way?" "I don't think so. Actually I...I like another cat. I'm so sorry, [Name]."

"Wow, [Name]. I know your thing is honesty, but come on!"

"No disrespect ma'am, but there's a big difference between pushing yourself as hard as you can, and just being reckless. And if being reckless is what gets rewarded around here, if that's what it means to be a Wonderbolt, then I don't want any part of it."

"Hey, now wait a minute! Just because I don't have a pet now doesn't mean I never want a pet!"

"Oh, that's my new toy. Pretty, isn't she? I bet I'm the only queen with my very own RainWing."

"Now really, this is getting insulting. You're in my territory. Apparently you're living under my mountain. I am only the most important dragon for hundreds of miles. How dare you not recognize me?"

"It doesn't matter what Earth is like, it's not going to be like anything soon!"

"Don't you Gems have anything better to do than annoy me?"

"Ohh, I adore these fantasies! They have the best fashions."

"Wait! I-I wouldn't have called just to waste your time with a report."

"Just being on a ship with [Name] made me tired."

"So am I gonna have to wear a star? Where am I gonna put the star?!"

"It'll be better this time. I've changed. You've changed me. I'm the only one who can handle your kind of power."

"You can't lie to me. I've seen what you're capable of. I thought I was a brute, but you... you're a monster."

"There's always someone to fight! There's just no one left worth fighting..."

"Uh, that was way more explosive than I expected."

"Someone ordered some noodles?"

"Yeah. I was about to take my break. So..."

"To be fair, do you trust any man? Any men? Men?"

"Does that mean I don't have a free room anymore? Aw, well shucks."

"OH MY GOD! My drugs! Damn it!"

"W-well I-I just wanted to look a little nicer for you. This is our first real date after all."

"I'm sorry, [Name]. I'm sorry for…everything…happening right now. I know it's…a lot. I, uh-- I should have listened."

"We're rich and we are hot. People want our money AND our bodies! Speak for yourself, princess."

"I swear… If you go near her I will destroy you!"

"I don't care what your arrogant brother thinks!"

"That. Was the sound…OF A FUCKING DIVORCE!"

"My hair is ruined!"

"My face. My face! MY FACE! GIVE ME BACK MY EYES!"

"I bet you don't even HAVE friends..."

"Your fans are watching you right now. I know."

"What's that supposed to mean, you got a problem or somethin', sour cream? Don't fuck with me!"

"Alright shit talker, but there hasn't been a soul yet who can beat me at my own game. So you better bring the fire baby!"

"Could've just used the door, dude. Doesn't need to be this whole thing."

"Do you think they saw me? Fuck! I did my make-up shitty today!"

"Oh, what does it matter?! You’re not my real dad, I was almost eighteen!"

"Totally. But since then, you've had me teaching you. You're stronger now. Don't you feel stronger?"

"I found out where it lives."

"I've won. You can all see that. We can end this now, without killing anyone. I ask you all to let him live!"

"He's just a human! He isn't a threat at all! He's not one of them!"

"I just want to go home."

"You don't understand! Just leave me alone."

"Slow down, kiddo. This is the thanks I get for checking in on my favorite student?"

"Unloaded all your secret insecurities on me! I know! But hey, no shame in that, man. Sometimes you just gotta talk it out, y'know? I don't really do it. Maybe I should. But we'd be here all day so..."

"Totally. But since then, you've had me teaching you. You're stronger now. Don't you feel stronger?"

"What we had wasn't healthy. I never want to feel like I felt with you. Never again! So just go!"

"I was terrible to you. I liked taking everything out on you. I needed to. I-I hated you. It was bad!"

"[Name], you can still wear the hat, if you want." "Thanks, but I'm not putting that on my body."

"It was an endless, crushing darkness. Wet and bleak and suffocating. Water was the tomb I lived in for those months."

"You do realize that I spent the last few months trapped under the ocean, right?"

"For a moment, I really felt like things were different, but they're not. No matter where I go, I'm trapped."

"I'm done being everyone's prisoner! Now you're MY prisoner! And I'm never letting you go!"

"Let's stay on this miserable planet, together!"

"Spoiler alert, the butter is spoiled."

"Sorry I fucked your husband."

"The FUCK is "insurance"?"

"It's only just come into existence, and it already doesn't like us."

"He can be a real sweetheart once you get to know him."

"We knew for sure you would prevail."

"I'm the monster."

"You're... going to LOVE ME!"

"Now that we've gotten that out of the way, how about a game?"

"A baby dragon! Oh, I've never seen a baby dragon before. He's so cute."

"[Name], I think our work here is done." "Put your clothes on, [Name]."

"I just want everyone to know: my plan would have also worked."

"All that matters is that [Name] is happy."

"What's in these things?"

"That's not my baby!"

“If I were forced to sing those same stupid songs for twenty years and I never got a bath? I’d probably be a bit irritable at night, too.”

“I’m still here. I will put you back together."

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