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chokchokk · 10 months

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2/2

𝐭𝐡𝐞 𝐫𝐞𝐝 𝐡𝐞 𝐥𝐞𝐚𝐯𝐞𝐬 𝐢𝐬 𝐝𝐢𝐟𝐟𝐞𝐫𝐞𝐧𝐭 [𝐢 𝐰𝐢𝐬𝐡 𝐢𝐭 𝐰𝐚𝐬] | choi san x fem!reader

PART THREE of : have your way with words, be my people pleaser

“Be mine tonight, Y/N.”

𝚜𝚢𝚗𝚘𝚙𝚜𝚒𝚜: The hour is twisted. You’re not at a club, you’re not sober, but most importantly, you’re not with him. Will Seonghwa do? No, of course not.

But he leaves you no other chance.

“You’re so pathetic, it might actually be worth a try.”

𝚐𝚎𝚗𝚛𝚎: angst, smut

𝚜𝚝𝚊𝚝𝚞𝚜: 2nd half of PART THREE

𝚠𝚘𝚛𝚍 𝚌𝚘𝚞𝚗𝚝: 13.3k

𝚌𝚘𝚗𝚝𝚎𝚗𝚝 𝚠𝚊𝚛𝚗𝚒𝚗𝚐(𝚜): drug-use, drug abuse, alcohol, mdma (ecstasy, molly), vulgar language, just a lot of vulgarities and profanity, hate-fuck?, aggressive, teasing, cunnilingus, fingering, unprotected sex, sex with feelings but no love, sex with no respect, cumming inside; reader cant stop thinking about san, writer is a bit stoic, seonghwa is a hot bitch, hwa and writer are liars lmao

𝚊𝚞𝚝𝚑𝚘𝚛'𝚜 𝚗𝚘𝚝𝚎: the border looks that ugly on purpose btw not that you think otherwise LMAO

on ao3, this chapter is called “insanity” and i can’t promise it will be the only seonghwa-centred part throughout the series, but do please enjoy for the filth and angst of it all hehe!! <33 if you're asking “does san even make an appearance here?” i won’t tell you :P i know it's intimidating since there's just about like 10k build-up (because i'm a bitch LMAO) so if u wanna skip just find the second border i guessssssss

also, i really recommend listening to KLOUD's ESCAPE HALLOWEEN set (it's a soundcloud link) or any other hard tekno for the whole immersive experience lmao !!! <33

and also, thank you all very much for 100 followers and over 1000 notes ! ! ! wtf it's all happening so fast i can't catch up with yall....

𝚝𝚊𝚐-𝚕𝚒𝚜𝚝: @brown88 : @svintsandghosts: @hanniebeesworld : @downbadreading : @shingsoluvely (kissing all of yall <33)

Didn’t Seonghwa say “club” or are you being some conservative narc flaking out?

You’re standing in front of a white, slightly burnt industrial building that is barely holding on by itself, and taking into account how many people are smoking around here, the likeliness that it will catch on fire again is not too low. You can’t believe that you’re going to meet Seonghwa inside here, let alone San, let alone anyone with a healthy sense for flight or fight, but here you are, walking up to the line with confident steps.

Yes, it has made you very anxious that even the taxi-driver had no idea where he was heading. He promised to drive you back home if anything happened, so the taxi-hotline is on speed-dial— just in case— and you just thought, holy fuck, hopefully Seonghwa won't leave me alone here.

But once you’d seen the seemingly endless line of people, you knew you have arrived at the right place. Or at least something like the right place. It all seems off, this building in the middle of nowhere outside the city, but you told the driver the vague address and he found you this hidden ware- and clubhouse, both of you hesitating to confirm that this was the correct location.

Nothing here seems legal, smells legal, looks legal— oh well.

The only thing you can say with certainty is is that you are looking and smelling the best you have ever looked and smelled this entire semester, and even if you have no fucking clue who these people that are whistling at you are, you know you’ve done everything right tonight when they wave at you to join them. You just skipped a whole chunk of the line here, but nobody seems to mind it. What a democratic party, maybe it’s not all that foul play and people do appreciate good things, eh?

It’s not an exaggeration or empty self-boast: You, in your skin-tight, revealing black body-con dress, skin glowing under the harsh night-light, are absolutely ravishing. There are looks on you— uncountably many of them, and usually, you’d fold under their heavy gaze, but having taken a few shots of the cheap rum back at home, you reciprocate their curious eyes with a sleek, cheeky smile, down-right inviting them to bathe in your appearance.

While the group of people take in the presence of you, blurting out their first thoughts immediately upon thinking, your confidence only grows bigger. Thank god drunk people say the truth, because “damn, she’s hot” is the ego-boost you needed to face whatever awaits you in that cubic building.

“ARE YOU FUCKING READY?”, booms out of it and it seems like a voice sample that’s been altered that hellishly deep. The crowd outside cheers. They're not even a part of the shenanigans yet, but still, they’re screaming and already moving their body in anticipation, throwing funny looking candy (you’re very sure that’s molly) inside their mouths. They’re ready, but Y/N, are you? It is an honest question to ask yourself, and as you inhale the smell of people smoking the devil’s lettuce around you, you draw out how the night might progress for them.

You don’t know about San’s whereabouts, only that Seonghwa and him are going separately, which is a big plus if you want to fuck him today.

Uh-huh. Fuck Seonghwa. You’ve made it up in your mind because he just wouldn’t stop hinting at it in the car this morning. He is going to buy you drinks, going to show you his dancing, but most importantly, going to “make you enjoy yourself”, which of course, could just be wishful thinking from you iterating the conversation, but Seonghwa wouldn’t have bought the tickets for you for free if he wasn’t expecting some type of reward, would he?

At the minimum, the hinting painfully reminded you of the way you talked to San the very first days you first insinuated that he could stay over at your house and — oh, golly! — sleep there. Coming to think of it, your talk actually never worked, and it still ended up being San who made the first sexual move. You’re going to save Seonghwa from this embarrassment, and if not, you’re going to save yourself from your own embarrassment for if you do see San and his volleyball-“date” or whatever here.

Anyhow, at the maximum, you have a brain and are fully aware of the fact that people don’t “meet” at the club to just have a chat, whether it's him or San. People “meet” at the club to get crazy and fuck, and that’s exactly what you’re doing with Seonghwa — End of story. San is not going to write this chapter today. He won’t even end up in the epilogue, that’s how much you’re going to focus on Seonghwa. Go down. Get him on. Get on with him.

You bop your head a little bit to the deep bass that’s vibrating through the walls of the warehouse and the line is taking a painfully long time to move forward. You watch the people in your group chug down their self-mixed abominations and how they're throwing the remaining glass on the floor, whiffing their stimulants through their joints or gulping it down by tablets. Letting out a huff to exhale the sharp smell of weed, you try to become as detached as the ones around you, at the very least assimilate to their mood. You’re going to be with these people tonight, and just by putting one and one together, you get the feeling that it will be a long, ruthless evening. You can hear intoxicated screams leave the front door, the deep voice continuing to hype up their cheers.

It's all a hivemind of pure madness and … well, you're here for it, it seems like, no? Seonghwa is not going to be an exception, and you brace yourself to be meeting your date here.

Show you his dancing, he said…

You don’t know whether the DJ playing some extraordinary remixes or whatever to be deserving this much of screaming feedback, but it’s definitely music to get your mind lost to, you'll give this guy Mingi that; Splurging, ear-numbing beats and basses, inviting you to rock your body. You don’t hate the music, not at all. It just makes you question how Seonghwa was imagining to impress you. Here you are imagining body-rolls or whatnot, but this hard style techno isn't really the tune for that, is it? Okay, let's just say it's not music you'd turn on to get yourself into the mood on a Saturday night, that's what's there to it.

It’s ironical, really. Usually around this time you’d be fumbling around your phone on your couch to ask San if he’s free or not, and sometimes he is, but most of the time he’s not. Those days where he just comes over on your mark have been over long time. Now, he’ll either show up at your house unprecedented or ask you to show up at his house in an ungodly hour.

Huh, isn’t that one funny butterfly effect. You woke up early because of San's mistress and here you are, lining up to become Seonghwa's. Is this right? "I heard you were going to be at Mingi’s party. Meet me there." Even now, you’re trying to convince yourself that this contact name “volleyball” could be anyone, maybe even just a friend that is trying to link up at this not-so party-looking party. Hm, you think, would a friend text him so intimidatingly? San hates periods to end messages, it scares him. So no, not a friend. At least not a friend that knows him as much as you do. Someone he had a fight with, maybe? No, Choi San doesn’t have fights, he’s too avoidant of conflict for that. It has got to be someone that has once been close to him and a bit too close to your liking.

No, no, fuck no, let’s stop this, you murmur to yourself and wriggle down your dress so it covers your ass at least.

Fucking Seonghwa. That’s your one and only mission tonight, of course followed by having fun and getting all hell loose.

It will just be one night and it will either make you 1) want to stay with San, or 2) finally move on and agree that San is just a … friend with too many benefits. You have to convince yourself you’re not in love with San. You can’t be in love with San. Disregarding of how curious you are in meeting him here.

“Ticket,” the control-man orders around the people in front of you and you get out your phone out of your tiny bag for the ticket, when you see that Seonghwa has already messaged you.

Seonghwa (San’s roomie): I’ll be waiting at the bar for you by the way Seonghwa (San’s roomie): You have to walk up the stairs on the left when you enter Seonghwa (San's roomie): Excited to see you ;)

You have been guessing already that something was going to break tonight, but it might as well be those stairs Seonghwa is talking about. From the amount of people that are still waiting behind you, you hope that they’re not all trying to go the bar.

“Ticket, please,” the control-man repeats, but strangely enough, his tone is a bit friendlier to you for some reason. “Here you go,” you duplicate his kindliness and he nods, dropping his smile as soon as he moves on to the next guess. Strange.

You eye the buff guy, but the impatient crowd pushes you into the square door. In you go.

“GET YOUR FUCKING HANDS UP!”

Harsh red lights, laser and smoke hit your senses. (Though you can only be so sure that the last part is really planned for the show-experience.)

Maybe you underestimated the capabilities of a warehouse. It’s still not what you thought of when you heard "club", but it surely still gets your club-mind going. Ignoring the grimy looking walls that seem to crumble with every beat that’s drumming inside your ears, the pungent smell of cheap-ass perfume, artificial sweeteners and alcoholic beverages strike into your nose, blurring your sight for a short moment. There are no windows in this hell-hole, but that’s the concern for another hour.

This is only the beginning. So, let’s focus.

Left, stairs, go up, there’s the bar Seonghwa was messaging you about. It surprises you that you’re not being swarmed by more people trying to get drinks, but it makes sense, since so many of them have already drunk outside or taken other substances to get themselves prepared for the night. That’s the first thing.

Second thing; suprisingly, the stairs are actually kind of durable. You can physically feel the bass run through your veins as you grab the handrail, but maybe that’s just because of the cold metal. Nothing to worry about here, you exhale and make your way up.

Lastly, and most importantly, look at you, you’re smiling. That’s the biggest, best thing. The euphoria these people are screaming out is down-right infectious, isn’t it? Their daft, hypnotic cries are calling out to you on the dance floor, but you’re going to be there sooner or later, with the man that brought you here in the first place.

“Hey, Seonghwa.”

“Hey, Y/N, you—“

He was sitting on a barstool, admiring the flashing lights all throughout the warehouse through his sunglasses, when you put your hand on his barely clothed shoulder and make him turn around.

“Holy shit, Y/N.”

You grin. Of course Seonghwa wouldn’t disappoint with his reaction. He rips the sunglasses from his face immediately, gets up from his seat and embraces you with one arm, not daring to let one eye sway away from you, his tongue pushed to the surface of his mouth, as he suppresses his gleeful grin. He looks star-struck, the supernatural-looking lights surrounding him are only emphasising this sight. Otherworldly.

“Where have you been hiding that?”, he asks, commenting on your body as respectfully as he can. You know he can’t handle a lot of alcohol, so his marvel must be double the truth, right? Seonghwa isn’t a liar.

“I’ve not been hiding anything,” you scoff and Seonghwa laughs nervously.

“Y/N, you look… absolutely fantastic.”

“You don’t look to shabby yourself, Seonghwa,” you smile and muster the charcoal-haired man from bottom to top. It’s very out-of the ordinary, but honestly, you should have expected something like this after he invited you here. It goes without saying, you could have served him the same reaction to his outfit. The man who was wearing sportswear? He’s now wearing a black, nylon, baggy pant, with a distressed knitted top that barely serves as an excuse for clothing as it is not covering any of his body parts correctly— and even if you’d already gushed about his athletic figure this morning, you have not expected to be seeing Seonghwa’s abs and breast this exposed this early tonight. There is jewellery all around his outfit, just dangling from the fabric, but also his ear and hands, spiky and shiny, almost hazardous looking.

Damn, either you haven’t seen Seonghwa enough or this dude has been hiding more from you than you could account for. He looks as fashionable as much as he looks demonic, ready to sin with you, and that is the most meaningful compliment of the night.

“Thank you, I knew you’d like it.”

“Really? Me?”, you laugh, getting your hair out of your face, tugging it behind your ear.

“You have a strange taste,” Seonghwa smirks and while you puzzle together what he means, he signs something to the bartender with his ringed fingers.

“What are you doing?”

“I’m ordering us shots. Keeping my first promise.”

“With sign-language?”

Seonghwa smirks and sits down again, you following him to the same.

"I'm a friend of Mingi's, they know me around, that's all."

"Y'all are weird."

“That’s just our ways here.”

“Your ways? You sound like some pretentious club-kid,” you nag.

“What if I am, huh? Are you gonna leave, if I was?”, Seonghwa teases and is served a tray of four shots, coloured a dangerously unnatural purple colour. He slides a 10-dollar bill onto the counter and the bar-keeper takes it with no words spoken out loud, which gives Seonghwa the time to devote all his attention to you. It’s flattering how astounded he is by you, as if he hasn’t seen you pretty ever in his life. But then again, you can only do so much styling and make-up when San calls you at 10 PM, asking you to “hurry”.

“We’ll see how the night progresses,” you smirk, and grab the first shot. Seonghwa also takes one and slightly raises the small cup.

“I won’t disappoint you.”

Sweet — the taste of the shot.

All types of fruits and harsh, cheap liquour plunge into your mouth and melt on your tongue. It’s going to make your head hurt the next day, one hundred percent, but maybe it will be Seonghwa to get you some pills to soothe the ache.

… If he wasn’t San’s god-damned roommate.

Or he could stay at your home. It’s been a while since another man than him has slept in your bed, and maybe it’s long overdue.

“Let’s hurry up, I wanna dance with you,” you gulp down the sugary liquid and Seonghwa chuckles.

“We’ve got enough time, Y/N. Let’s savour this one together.”

Sweet — The spark in his eyes, his flawless skin, perfectly plump lips— holy fucking shit. Seonghwa is fucking breathtaking.

“Y/N?”, Seonghwa asks and you see that he’s already moved on to the second shot, waiting for you to move on.

“I didn’t know you had that kind of sexy stare in you,” your alcohol blurts out for you and in the meanwhile, you grab the next shot glass.

“Sexy stare?”, Seonghwa asks and grins.

“Screw you! You know what I’m talking about,” you hiss and show him your tongue to offend him, but Seonghwa just tilts his head, raising the glass to your face.

“Loveshot?”, he asks and for a moment, you don’t know whether he’s joking or not. Maybe you’re just feeling weird because a male has said the word “love” in your proximity. (The only man in your life who's a candidate in hearing that word avoids it like a disease.)

“Only if you mean it,” you purr seductively, lick your lips, and praise to fucking god he’s taking the hint. Seonghwa leans in and crosses your arms around, the cold rim of his drink suddenly resting at your lip.

“That’s not how loveshots work,” you notify, but you still mirror him and place your glass under his lips.

“Do you care?”

“No.”

Seonghwa chuckles and with one movement of his hand, the second shot is flowing down your oesophagus. It’s cold, starkly contrasting the humid conditions in the warehouse, but it’s just enough to get your senses rolling again.

You don’t even care that you made Seonghwa miss half the drink, his alcohol tolerance will give him just the right kick from the first shot. Also he doesn’t protest at all, when you hop from your seat to finally get the evening going.

“Let’s go now!”, you order him around and he gladly obeys. “Lead the way,” he says, putting his hands on your shoulder, which he hopefully won't be able to keep there for long, as you both strut down the stairs and into the crowd.

The massive crowd is crazy, and it’s ever-growing.

“What is this place?”, you ask Seonghwa, as he’s being pushed against your back by the people on the way to the dancefloor and Seonghwa has the perfect opportunity to grab you by your hips to not lose you, but frustatingly enough, he doesn’t. His hands leave your shoulders and Seonghwa just tries to manoeuvre to you.

“I wouldn’t be able to tell you,” Seonghwa answers honestly and you look for a free place to roam and dance. People are trying to get as close to the DJ as possible, but once those are gone, there’s actually some space you can use— you just have to get there.

“You come here often?”, you ask, leaning backwards for your voice to hit his skin. You'll be hoarse by the end of the night.

“I’ve only went twice. San went to every single set of Mingi, though!”

“Really? San goes here frequently?”

“Yeah! Does that shock you?”

“Of course it does.” You stop, turn around and Seonghwa’s hands stay in place in his pants, as you talk to him. “This, all of this, doesn’t seem like San at all.”

“Hmm, I know what you’re getting at. But that’s just our boy, eh?”

You stare into his eyes and search for some type of playfulness, but Seonghwa means his words. This is where San roams— is roaming right now, maybe— and it, all of it, just fucking confuses you. This is not the "party" you would have expected to see that man in, and if that wasn't bad enough, he's apparently a regular. You hope you’re not pushing some kind of innocent image onto him, but despite the alcohol that's heating up your cheeks and making you dumber every talking second, you’re seriously puzzled. That he’s never invited you is questionable already, but is “that San for you”? You don't know.

Wiggling your hips, you try to retrace history to the very moment you had met shy little San at the seminar, up until now, where he’s grown three times his size and you feel like he's some type of fucking mystery that is impossible for you to solve. Nerd? Hopeless romantic? Hard to get? Playboy? San may act like he’s open-minded, but he’s the most secretive guy you’ve seen. Not like Seonghwa, who, mind you, is still looking at you with the most intense fuck-me eyes, that it’s actually eating you up.

“Let’s stop talking about San.”

“Why?”, Seonghwa asks, obliviously, eyes turning back to normal.

“Because it’s us here! You and I, Seonghwa and Y/N. If they drank a loveshot together, they should act like it, don't ya think, huh?” you grunt, already slurring your words. You start to move your body according to the heavy beat, tits jerking out to the front, arms waving like they have a life on their own. Seonghwa smiles and accordingly begins to step his feet where yours aren’t; your bodies are annoyingly close, but still not touching at all.

“How do you mean that, Y/N?”, he asks and you slap his revealed shoulder with the back of your hand to stop his teasing. “I thought you wanted to show me your dancing, Seonghwa!”, you whine and he laughs at your comment.

But Seonghwa doesn’t say anything after that, which gets on your nerves even more and in response, you turn your body slightly away while swaying your hips from side to side.

“You know what you said,” you hiss and he probably can’t hear you because the DJ is transitioning to a track with even more bass penetrating your ears.

You scurry your body to the beat and catch the gaze of someone in the crowd, who’s noticed you for the same reasons Seonghwa can’t keep his eyes away from you. The stranger is drilling his gaze up and down your chiselled body, licking his lips. Feeling playful, you make a suggestive expression towards him in return of the attention, winking at him. The male immediately makes his way to you.

"You do molly?”, he asks into your ear and you see that he’s got two skittles with cartoonish hearts and smileys drawn on them. That’s Adam. You never did him before, but you surely have heard of him, your friends have had him, your friends have loved him, your friends had painful break-ups with him. Merciless adam, MDMA.

You look back at Seonghwa who’s still dancing next to you, acting like he's not watching this whole situation go down, putting on his sunglasses again, and pushing it up his nose bridge. It sucks. His skin under the top is teasing you to look at it, and it feels so unusual to be longing for him, like you can't comprehend he's not... the other one.

So, though you do hesitate for a short second, you take two of the heart-painted ones and smile at the stranger, who sounds rotten from inside out, voice raspy and hoarse.

“Are you alone?”, he asks into your ear and while you think of answer, you muster Seonghwa, whose eyes you cannot track anymore, since the black cubic shades are hiding his prettiest possession. Is he still looking at you? Watching the sky? Who knows. Only he knows.

“Maybe?”, you answer and rotate your head to the stranger’s direction. You don’t care for this man, not at all, but what you do care for is Seonghwa’s reaction. Bouncing your ass up and down against the stranger's baggy jeans like the grand girl you are, he gets his hand at your waist and tries to pull you over his place, but, there he is, Seonghwa to come save the night.

“Fuck off, she's taken.”

He pushes the male away with his elbow and the grip immediately loosens up. “Hey, hey, dude, don’t hit me. Sorry, dude.” Seonghwa is visibly taller than him, and apparently that’s enough for the poor guy to get intimidated by his sunglassed face and disappear into the crowd with quick feet.

“YOU WANNA PLAY?”, the artificially deepened voice echoes through the warehouse and you stare into what you can make out from Seonghwa’s eyes with an earnest frown. You’ve felt unnecessarily angsty and frustrated the whole day since you saw that message on San’s phone, and this is the guy who’s going to hold responsibility for it, better with his whole fucking devotion now.

“What was that?”, you tease Seonghwa, who’s finally getting his hands out of his pockets and pulling you closer to him by your wrist. You can’t exactly read his expression since he’s covered his face still, but that actually makes it feel a lot better. There's something off about him, like Seonghwa is a stranger, like you’re not doing it for him, but rather… yourself. You're doing this because it makes you feel good, not the other way around. That's empowering.

“Whatever you want it to be, Y/N.”

“Stop tip-toeing around it! Are you going to fuck me or not? ‘Cause there’s more of those guys everywhere here,” your alcohol spits again and Seonghwa pants.

“Well, shit,” he laughs and finally glides into your waist with his arms. “That was direct.”

“I can flirt with you, but not under these fucking conditions,” you growl, intoxicated, recycling gritty air in your lungs, moving your sticky body to the beat and occasionally grinding against Seonghwa’s lower body with your legs from the front. "I can flirt and fuck you," he hums and frames his hands around your hips, connecting himself to you.

“Do you do molly, Seonghwa?”, you grin, the two pills waiting to be popped in inside your hand.

Seonghwa takes a look at the capsules, and you wait for his answer, as he appears to investigate them. Does he know what he's looking for? Apparently yes, as he pushes up his sunglasses and rubs the corners of his lips with two of his fingers, “Gimme.”

He picks it up from your flattened hand, and you would’ve loved to share it like a love-shot again, but before you could request it, Seonghwa has gulped it down. Not his first rodeo, you assume, and follow his suit.

Good thing that your throat hasn't dried out yet and the pill glides down your throat with your saliva. It's not going to take long until the jubilation of the alcohol you've consumed meets the ecstatic effect of molly, and you bite your lip with a grin. "Never thought I'd be doing drugs with you, Seonghwa," you purr and Seonghwa shrugs with a huff, “I thought you’d never even consider it.” Seonghwa exhales in the heat of it all, pulling you closer.

“What? Because of San?”

“Of course because of San,” Seonghwa cackles and puts his pointy chin in between the space of your collarbone and neck, so that his voice is hitting the spot of your hickey. “You know he’s here somewhere, right?”

“Yeah, but the probability that we’ll see him is like zero, so that’s not my concern.”

“You’d be concerned if he saw us, though?”, Seonghwa asks, loose-tongued, murmuring against your neck. He’s definitely fully gotten drunk, his body heavily weighing into yours, as he gets one arm up and around your head; his hand is tangled into your scalp without a caution of messing up your hairstyle. You finding out what the molly will do to him is only a matter of time.

“Are you asking if I’m committed to him?”

Seonghwa licks his lips, “accidentally” getting your skin with his tongue. It takes you aback a bit and you whine, your eyes dozing off for a short moment. You can still taste the remains of the shot at the back of your cheeks and it's the only thing you can sense correctly. Everything else is either fogged or slowly disappearing, or becoming even harsher like the red laser lights that you fear are going to pierce through you.

“No, I’m not asking whether you’re committed,” Seonghwa answers, leaning into your skin even more, “I know you guys aren’t in a relationship. Or, you know, at least he isn’t committed.”

“WANNA GET NASTY?”

It shouldn’t hurt, but it does. Even when you’re feeling very seduced because he is trying to get the same moaning reaction out of you by licking your sensitive spot and it’s working, you don’t want to be reminded that San doesn’t care for you as much as you do for him. Sure, that sounds harsh, but it’s the truth, isn’t it? You’re not the one living in the same space as San, Seonghwa is.

“Huh? Does he sleep with a lot of women?”, you ask him out of morbid curiosity, acting tough, as Seonghwa works deeper into your neck, getting the skin to soften for him.

“Do you really want to know?”

“Fuck you! Don’t protect me!”

“Ask him yourself,” he lisps, his sharp tongue grazing against your hickey, teasing your pettiness.

“I deserve to know.”

Seonghwa is the one rolling his eyes now, sighing, “You can be such an annoying brat, Y/N. How does San keep up with you?”

You try to yank your head back to show your discontent with his choice of words, but Seonghwa has you deep in his grip and puts you in place.

“You were the one who didn’t want to talk about San,” he lulls into your ear, stroking your hair to calm you down. Sure, that sounds reasonable, but still not an excuse to call you an “annoying brat”.

You take a wild guess about why Seonghwa isn’t just giving you the answer and argue, “I can still be curious, can’t I? San is not committed, you say? Why? Does he get more bitches than you?”

“He tried to get back with his ex.”

Bingo!

Wait, no. What the fuck?

“Huh, when?”, you ask, and irritatingly enough, Seonghwa has begun biting and licking into your neck at the one spot you can’t stop exhaling sweet noises for him. “Seonghwa, you better fuu-huucking answer.”

“Yesterday,” he murmurs against your skin and ding, ding, ding; things make a lot of sense now.

“No, you’re kidding,” you scoff, and push him away with all your strength. With a numbed mind, Seonghwa tumbles back and laughs, “Hey, it’s no big deal, he called you immediately after it didn’t work out.“

“Seonghwa, are you listening to yourself?”

“WANNA GET FUCKING CRAZY?”

“I’m saying it all like it happened, Y/N. San tried to win her back by inviting her to an expensive dinner, but then she flunked out right in the end, when he invited her back home. And, when he came home alone with a boner, San contacted you.”

“You're lying. Don't lie, Seonghwa, lying is a sin," your splur, but once his words have met your brain, it all just becomes chaos inside. It feels like marbles are rolling down inside your head and nothing is making sense, it’s all going nowhere and everywhere with this information. What are you supposed to feel like? Betrayed? There has never been a promise. Sad? You were going to fuck Seonghwa, you're not the most truthful, either.

“Come on, Y/N. You knew it the second San slammed you against that wall at 11 PM, didn’t you?” Seonghwa glides his thumb over your neck and grins, confirming the evidence of yesterday’s night. The roughful sucking of San could barely be covered up by concealer, and you probably sweated it away already.

“He— he said he was stressed.”

“Because of uni? Don’t lie to yourself, Y/N~”, the male purrs. Amidst of it all, Seonghwa is strangely still moving his body calculated to the beat, hitting each one of the drums with his shoulders, all while he hushes behind you to brainwash you with a whiskery voice. “It’s still San we’re talking about.”

You huff perplexedly and are too flabbergasted by his harsh words to not be affected by Seonghwa’s talking and let him hug you tightly again. He’s almost putting you into a headlock of consolation, or something that would have been great if it had been, indeed, consolation. (It is not. He’s almost choking you with his forearm and the way his hand is pushing into your scalp, nothing about this position is in any way soothing.)

“Tell me something, Seonghwa,” you gutter, since the thought has been recoiling rounds in your head forever and curiosity will always kill the cat. “… is she from his volleyball team?”

“No,” he answers and for some reason, this is a lot worse, “she isn’t, but— wait, how do you know about the girl from his volleyball team?”

You don’t answer. For the sake of your heart, you do not answer. You’re still moving, but you’re moving silently, staring into the humorously wild lasers that are teasing you just like he is.

Seonghwa gasps and cups your chin, his thumb meeting your lip, mushing the lower half of your face, trying to turn your face towards his direction, but you resist him. But who are you fooling. Seonghwa doesn't even need to see your expression to ask you, in an almost utterly disappointed whiny tone, "Nooo, Y/N, do you seriously check his phone?”

“I’m gonna punch you in your pretty fuck-face if you keep whining like that, Hwa.”

“Feisty and flattering, and a new nickname too! It must be my birthday,” Seonghwa chuckles and suddenly begins to nibble your earlobe, warm breath from his nose hitting the skin as he pants throughout his dancing. The alcohol is boiling inside you, being churned by the molly, and the crushing disillusionment is slowly into flaming, enraging, hateful desire. It has all gotta go somewhere, and for now, all you can do it talk with this scorching tone that is only going to turn into even more fuming, “How long has San been pining for his fucking ex?”

“For as long as I can remember," Seonghwa answers, seemingly not aware of the severity of this situation, "Middle of the second semester? Exam-season?”

“Nooo,” you scoff and can’t believe what you’re hearing. You don’t even need to calculate what time Seonghwa is talking about, it is engraved deeply into your memories. The same fucking exam season, when you were seeing San every afternoon and evening. You were right fucking there. He knew— you, on the other hand, not so much.

But you should have known.

“Well, yeah,” Seonghwa grins and is running his hands low to your stomach, almost touching your pelvis to get you worked up even more.

Should have known that you weren’t supposed to fall for San.

Angel faces hide the guts of devils’, and right now, your insides are over-cooking with the question "what the fuck were you thinking?" That he’d come around? Like no man in your life has ever come around? That San was the one? No, that San was going to believe that you were the one? 'Well, yeah', he should have, because you are the fucking one. You did so much for him, you could have done so much more for him, and it frustrates you.

“What are you grinning for, you motherfucker?”, you ask, as you peek over and see that Seonghwa has lowered his sunglasses and staring into your empty eyes, searching for a sign of life. You asked, but you don't really need the answer, the picture is drawn perfectly in front of you. Seonghwa is smirking for the same reasons he’s telling you all of this; it’s pretty clear.

“I like it when you’re bossy,” he chuckles, having become more than ‘a bit cocky’ with you, “unlike San. He hates that, right? He’s so weak-hearted, how can he—“

“You’re his friend, Seonghwa,” you insist and grit your teeth, pushing up his sunglasses again with your two fingers, poking into the middle of the lens to make it greasy.

“Friends can say things about each other!”, he giggles gullibly, and scrunches his face together.

All you can say is that Seonghwa sounds and looks moronic in those square sunglasses, senseless and boozed out of his mind, but in the short moment he licks his sharp canine teeth, you suppose that this is exactly how you need him to be.

“You listen to everything, don’t you?”, you ask him, giving into his touch, pushing your back profile so close to him, that there is no touchable space left between you two. Ass pressed against his pelvic area, you breathe heavily into his face that’s glued to your temple. “Every single night I come over to fuck your roommate?”

“Noise-cancelling can only do so much, and your sound is addicting,” Seonghwa pouts— babbling his truths like it’s water falling out of his mouth— and when you see his pink lip shine under the flashing lights, your mind disorients. He is still the pretty boy that says pretty words, even when he's probably faking all of it; he is getting your insides all fuzzy, and you are still being lured in by him, but not for the reasons Seonghwa would enjoy them to.

You’re chasing the feeling of his comfort and you know it. You’re chasing after the man that won’t leave you alone. Or no, you are alone— so fucking lonely because of him even— but you don’t want to be alone, you don’t want him to leave you alone.

San.

Fuck. San.

The feeling of drowning in San’s praise, in his words, inside his bedroom, muffled by his sheets, it hunts you, it makes you feel watched, and it makes you feel like you’re hungry for something you can’t digest. Every word he has said to you is written in your memories in special font, and even though he is out of sight, San will always stay in your mind. Does he do it on purpose? Leave marks, with both words and his lips? To profit off of your yearning? To make himself feel better? To own something? To feel proud? Does he say it that loud on purpose, too? To make his roommate hear him? To make his roommate feel bad in order to feel good?

Maybe he does. Maybe he doesn't. Maybe San doesn't know Seonghwa is listening at all, maybe he doesn't care about any of it.

"Your pretty sounds," Seonghwa repeats himself, his face pressed against your cheek and you roll your eyes at his lips grazing your skin, his heavy breath from his nose warming it up.

These two men are woven by the same needle, knitted with the same material for they say surprisingly similar things and act surprisingly same, but for some reason, it does not feel the same. It is not the same. It should be the same. It should be the fucking same, fuck! You’re going to explode. The way that your head is spinning, your hips swinging, music ringing— people screeching, feet stomping— everything is happening around and inside you. Head, shoulders, knees and toes, livid. Brain, guts, uterus, livid. Let’s not talk about your heart or else we have to start over again. Just forget about your heart and think about the things that are of use tonight. What can you focus on? You can focus on your body glowing hot, but you could also focus on Seonghwa, whose baggy pants is rubbing against your thin minidress. It’s Seonghwa that you wanted, right? Or was it Seonghwa you were supposed to want, because he is the one that wants you back? — No, fuck, let's re-roll, quickly; Seonghwa is grinding against you right now, from behind, and that's exactly what you imagined, wasn't it? Under these lights, under this influence, this is what you wanted, wasn't it?

With the state of your mind, you can not agree with anything; your thoughts sound foreign and it's not your voice speaking, when you grind your ass back. It also doesn't feel like it's your eyes that you're seeing with; Seonghwa’s smile behind of you is becoming blurry and there’s just one more face that’s slowly appearing from the front-ends of your head. There’s a catch though; what you’re seeing is not the soft face you usually cup with your delicate hands and observe in awe when he sleeps, it’s not the face that lights up when he sees you enter through his front door, it's a face that's reading a text message from his fucking ex in the morning and immediately forgets that you're next to him, available as available can be.

It is actually going to make you puke, right here and there. All your emotions, all your ambitions, all of your fucking dreams. Who is San to you? What is he? You’ve known him for what, a year? — Okay fuck, that’s actually more than you thought, but still, it’s not like San and you have met up in any way that wasn’t purely sexual during all the time you knew him. Know him. You don’t know San. You don’t know shit about him. What are you— San and you? What are you going to be? Boyfriend, girlfriend? Has a nice ring to it, but fuck no, right? There are too many girls, right? Which is why you wanted to get yourself another man too, right?

“Come on, Y/N, forget him.”

While you have alcohol and molly inside you, singing two different songs of lust and desire, Seonghwa is moving his legs according to yours and pressing himself more against you. He’s one sadistic dipshit if Seonghwa thinks you could forget any of what you just went through just by moaning into your ear, but you're going with it.

You can't feel a lot right now, except that Seonghwa’s bulge perfectly fits in the space of your ass, rubbing up and down between the two circular shapes, getting himself more erected with every passing beat.

This whole situation is so fucked up and messy.

But, add one more: You are fucked up and messy. The music is building up loudly and people are shaking their bodies next to you, dancing in the high they've reached long time ago, eyes having lost any sign of concentration or sobriety, and you came here to contemplate whether you’re going to have a one-night-stand to prove a point, mixing drugs to get it on faster. You feel quicker, no, you are quick, rushing from one thought to another like you’re fleeing from your inner voices, both the devil and angel. They’re useless in this situation, they have too much reason.

And you don't need any reasons to think you're in the right to fuck him. Seonghwa’s hands are on your abdomen and gently massaging the skin, making you feel like he thinks you’re valuable, but you both know that this dance you’re holding right now barely cost you anything but 10 dollars in cash.

The red lasers haven’t stopped. They are pointing upwards or downwards for you, but you guess, from the way you’re watching Seonghwa’s lips right now, there’s only one way down. There has always been only one way down.

San chooses an ex over you? Then you’ll choose his dumb fucking roommate over him. Two can play this game, and even if he’s had the lead, you’re going to make your play. Is it going to hurt him? You don’t know. Maybe it won’t. But at least it will be over, right? At least this fucking thing will be over.

“Kiss me, Seonghwa.”

“You serious? I thought San was all up your mind right now.”

“Oh my fucking god, just do it before I take it back.”

“LET’S GET FUCKING INSANE”

Seonghwa doesn’t let you ask twice. While people all around you are turning up to the beat-drop, he pulls your chin up and clashes his lips against yours. His teeth clank against you lip and there's a short, piercing pain there, but Seonghwa's high chuckle blows it away. It’s a violent kiss, but mind-numbing enough so maybe you can forget why you decided to kiss him in the first place. While your lips are working against each other, his hand is sliding down to your groin and it's dangerously close to the seam of your tiny dress. One tug and your whole leg is revealed to the crowd, but you don't look down to see how naked Seonghwa is making you; all you see is yourself, in the reflection of his square sunglasses.

His tongue is electrifying, when it forces its entry into your mouth. It’s long and tastes deliciously foreign- a mixture of alcohol and tobacco, which you haven't experienced in pair since a long time. San, no, “he” (this is what you’ll call him now) doesn’t smoke, which at first, you considered as a big win, because you were passively inhaling all the smoke from your prior flings that you’d had the feeling your lungs were being polluted. Yet a year later, you’re clean— cleaner than never before, you should be able to breathe, you should be able to think clearly, but you can’t. Did you think he was pure? Was it that? That he was this untouched man? Maybe he was. Maybe he was, when he was still a nerd who had never heard a woman say the word “sex” in his— or had he? Fuck, had he? You don’t know, you couldn’t have known. ‘He’ was a façade, wasn’t it? He turned into another person immediately, didn’t he?

Let's get back on Seonghwa’s lips.

You're reminded of your lost freedom and as much it drives you insane, it's driving you into a state of pure, adventurous lust. The way Seonghwa works across your slick tongue is animalistic and wild, and you feel like you’re being pursued with no escape. To catch your breaths a little bit, Seonghwa lets go off your chin and thigh, turning you around so he can have better access to your mouth. Not letting the enlivening music go to waste, he presses his lips on yours the second you inhaled for the second time.

You slip your hands under his knitted top, running them up and down his breast, his abs and abdomen to feel his muscles and skin. It’s only a matter of time until he asks you to move off the dance floor, but your alcohol is bombarding you with sweet suggestions you can’t let pass without saying. His exposed skin feels cold under your fingers, but when you cup his hardened erection through the fabric with your hand and move it according to Seonghwa’s tongue slicking against yours, he radiates heat.

“Fuck,” Seonghwa pants into the kiss and you hum, continuing to tease him on this godless dance floor. Nobody has their senses right and is observing you two making out with dozy eyes, nobody cares about anything here. There’s only right now, the song the DJ is playing for the mindless crowd of drugged, intoxicated people. Let’s get insane.

You try to get a good feel of Seonghwa’s cock and its girth with your hand. “You’re big,” you murmur, catching air again, “smaller than San though.”

And there you have it, men are so easy to galvanize.

“Say that again, you fucking cunt,” Seonghwa growls and digs his fingers into your ass, eyebrows pulled down so hard that his forehead could explode.

“Why? ‘Cause you’re better than him?”, you taunt him and click with your tongue, catching a breath. “You’re no better than Sannie,” you sneer, pointing at your hickey with your finger to remind him (but mostly yourself), “don’t think you could be.”

Seonghwa goes fucking angry. Apparently he thinks he’s done so much for you, has been so nice to you, has helped you, whatever, and this is how you show him your thanks. Grabbing your hair, he pushes his forehead against yours and you catch a glimpse of his darkened eyes, feeling the stinging pain from the impact linger, while he talks. His breath is scarce from having kissed you, so he’s trying his best to use his voice to taunt you.

"San is probably fucking his fucking ex-girlfriend right now, do you think you're any better than him, huh, slut? You are the one who's so fucking desperate to get him to love you, and you're still here with me, and you're kissing me, so we're both in the wrong, you fucking whore."

His words don’t mean anything to you, visiting the synapses of your brain, but leaving right after. You just grin with your eyelids covering half of your eye and Seonghwa realizes nothing is arriving inside your sweet, broken mind. Your cheeks are red from the lack of oxygen, drugs and you’re flushed at the cause of his libidinous touch, and Seonghwa sees he's been working around your hair a little bit too much, having ruffled it up to the point that a comb-through will not amount to a lot. You look like a crazy person to him, but nothing attracts a joke more than a hard-hitting punchline.

“We're both single,” is what you lull to correct him, licking over your lips that you can't feel anymore since Seonghwa has kissed them numb. "And I think that's all that matters."

You both hear the music come to an exhilarating high and slowly reach your evaporating point.

“You sound like San,” Seonghwa giggles and he probably thinks it's going to push you over, but it doesn't. He’s still staring into you like he’s searching for a weak spot, but you’re persistent, you’re needy, and while you are weak, you are unforgivably yourself, Y/N.

You smash both your hands on each of his cheeks and you look at yourself through the sunglasses, sneering, "Good. San is a better name to moan."

He scoffs and smiles so condescendingly sweet again, but out of his mouth comes nothing worthwhile. "I'm going to fuck your voice out of your fucking throat, you're never going to moan ‘San’ ever fucking again," he growls and you drench yourself in his vulgarity, kissing him repeatedly.

"Never again," Seonghwa repeats himself, digging his thumbs into your ribs, but his tone isn't as forcing as it is... begging. Asking—demanding you to put all your attention on him, like he knows your heart isn't his and he desperately wants to possess yours. Oh, he definitely knows. You're not fooling anybody, at least didn't try to, but Seonghwa is gullible enough to fall for your tricks, how it seems like. San is painted on your body all the while your dance partner is speaking through his heavy breathing; painted on your neck, in your eyes, it’s annoying Seonghwa, it distracts him, it makes him see red, and not the colour on your skin.

"Awww, do you want me to only moan your name tonight?", you baby Seonghwa, mocking that he's finally revealed his motivations behind all of this. At least you think you've hit the nail in the coffin, when you pout to mirror Seonghwa’s expression.

Seonghwa's greatest sin isn't lust, it's envy. It could be any girl coming and leaving their dorm, moaning San’s name through the thin walls, never to be seen again and he wouldn't bat a second eye, but you— Y/N? San letting a woman like you go without further notice sickens him, like a crime, like a mistake. To hear your voice be pleasured by San at night, and then hear you sing good-bye to the man who does not care as much as he does in the morning, that has sent Seonghwa into a spiral of jealousy, but you’re not sure why. Some fucked-up reason probably, though it doesn’t seem like an ex is the cause this time. Maybe it’s really just because of you.

Sorry to say that you don’t care about that though. Not one single fucking bit. You don't want any of that complex trauma-talk tonight. You want to have sex and forget the sex right after.

"Be mine tonight, Y/N," Seonghwa answers and his eyebrows are pushed in to his forehead. He looks sultry, at least the parts you can see. Sultry, passionate, ready to fuck you, no, desperate to fuck you, in fact, you can feel the pre-cum soak his pants, when you cup his girth.

“You’re so pathetic,” you smirk, “it might actually be worth a try.” Seonghwa lets out a breathy exhale, finally breaking. You don’t know if it’s the alcohol, the molly, or his issues that suddenly took over his conscience, but he doesn’t have any of that left. He grabs you by your wrist with a grip that leaves a white mark, and without forewarning, Seonghwa yanks you through the people.

You hit each and every one of the strangers on your way to wherever. Shoulder hitting against shoulder, breast against breast, it better not leave any more bruising that you already have on your neck. “Seong- wha!”, you wheeze, tumbling at his force, tripping over your own feet over and over. The hall is huge, and he’s seemingly seeking to get to the very end of it.

“Seonghwa!”, you repeat yourself, but he won't listen to you. You're being pulled into a rollercoaster of anything but emotions (at least for you) and you can hear laughter leave your mouth without reason as you pass by irritated people who find it impolite to be barging into the big crowd like this. This dude's crazy, they scorn, but they don't really look that lucid as well, you find, with the last bits of thinking you can do.

"Where are we going?", you ask, but mostly to reassure that you still have a sense for geographical knowledge. You can see the bar again, mobs of people dancing on the stairs so that it's shaking even more compared to how you two had left it, but most importantly, you see that this is a space that's occupied by your kind. So much skin. So many slutty outfits. Outfits? Lingerie. This side looks like a fucking strip-club. Are you at a strip-club? What the fuck is this place? No, seriously, what the fuck is this place?

Seonghwa is finally stopping and you catch a breath from the running. With him doing his weird hand-signs again, you recognize the security guard from the beginning, smiling under his sunglasses, showing an "OK"-sign and pointing to the back of the stairs. You could swear he winked at you.

"What the fuck?", you ask, but Seonghwa only shrugs, making you follow his backwards steps under the stairs, where in black graffiti 'MY PEOPLE DONT BELIEVE IN LOVE' is smeared all over the wall. The same walls are occupied by couples or at least people making out wildly with their eyeliners smeared beyond repair. Is this some sex-area? (No idea) Is this legal? (100% no) Does Seonghwa look so fucking hot without his top on? (Fuck) He does.

Your eyes go cross-eyed, when Seonghwa enters the most mirrored bathroom you've ever seen in a warehouse, but before you can question the fact why people invest in decorating a fucking porta-potty, the male is pulling off his knitted top with one smooth pull, barely waiting a second for you to close the door behind you. The vibrations of the music ring on the metal stairs over you, and you feel like the beat is mushing your brain one size smaller, when you're met by Seonghwa barging at your body.

Pushing you against the plastic door, you feel all of Seonghwa's naked torso with your hands stroking roughly over his skin, and you admire his jewellery sitting on his collarbones, getting your fingers at it around his neck to pull him closer. "You like my necklace?", Seonghwa murmurs, as he pushes his lips into the crook of your neck.

"Choke on it," you gutter and yank him upwards, kissing him. While you do so and Seonghwa begins to unclothe you by getting your arms up, you catch a glimpse of yourself through the mirror. Your hair isn't looking as silky as it did when you left your home, there's mascara smudged around your eye already, but if you're not mistaken, and you can see it by how Seonghwa is sucking your nipples the second your bra falls to the floor, you will look worse in no time.

But that's not to say that you aren't still looking gorgeous. You look bewitchingly sexy, eyelids fluttering with each of Seonghwa's eager touches that are tracing down your body. "Fuck, you look so good," he murmurs and he's trying to keep his eyes open in order to see you. He's gotten you naked pretty quick considering the circumstance, you would've wished for a bit more foreplay here, but maybe it's a reoccuring theme to be impatient.

"You are such a fucking gorgeous girl, San doesn't know what he's missing right now," Seonghwa wheezes and goes through his hair, once he has your dress dropping on the dirty floor, revealing your joke of underwear. If he had kept your bra, he would have seen that you've worn a matching set of burgundy lingerie, but Seonghwa's mouth is still drooling at your pair of perfect thighs, his hand stroking over his lips. You roll your eyes at him and lean your head against the plastic door. You've done such a good job forgetting his name, and here's this dumbass mentioning him again. "You bet your ass he's missing this, huh?", you snarl and play with your own breast with one hand, while the other is cupping Seonghwa's rib, gliding down to his v-line, where his throbbing cock is awaiting you.

"He doesn't deserve you, Y/N."

He wheezes again. It seems like Seonghwa is taking his last breaths, unable to form words since your fingers are exploring how quick they can get to his erection.

"And you do?", you snap back and scoff. He pushes his glasses up to his forehead and for the first time since a long time, you can see Seonghwa's eyes shimmer. Oh fuck, you think, and it's difficult to not kiss him again. You're a bitch. You know you're a bitch for not caring about his feelings, and you know you will indeed not be better than San if you ghost this man right after this evening, but it must be done. For your sake, at least.

"I do," Seonghwa answers, though a lot weaker and less confident than he used to be before. You sigh. He may think he deserves you, but you don't deserve him. His gaze is too sweet, you've got to put those sunglasses back on, if you don't want to develop something. The only thing you can look at to get your mind elsewhere is yourself, in the mirror.

"Don't try to prove yourself," you murmur and Seonghwa wraps his arms around your back and props you by your thigh to lift you up. You can see his back muscle tense up, as he has you steadily in his grip. "I'm not," he answers and there's something that's fluttering inside your breast, when Seonghwa licks up your jawline, because you feel everything; From how wet his tongue is, how warm his saliva sits on your skin to the way what an adoring look Seonghwa is wearing on his face, as he kisses you. "I got nothing to prove to you."

You smirk and see yourself looking very dozy, drunken on alcohol, drugged by MDMA, ducked by Seonghwa's hand between your legs. It's pushing between your folds and with your last bit of control you have over your body, you spread your legs for him, inviting him to get his fingers inside your panties, and of course he does.

With a grin, Seonghwa devotes his tongue to your jaw again and works it into your skin with circular motion. "So fucking wet, and I thought you didn't want to fuck me."

"Who said I wasn't going to fuck you?"

Seonghwa is too busy sucking on the other side of your neck (other side meaning the side that is still unhickey-ed) to answer, but you're persistent. You came to this place to fuck him, and you're pretty sure that nothing from what you told him tonight alluded to something else. And also, even when you're fucked out of your mind, you still have a sense for people who keep secrets. So while Seonghwa is sucking small patches of skin on your neck and you see yourself with an opened mouth with sighs leaving it that you can't hear with your own ears.

"San says things sometimes," Seonghwa murmurs and continues to plant roses on your neck that you can see appear on your skin, "but that's irrelevant now."

"What does he say?", you insist, but the charcoal-haired man puts on his sunglasses again and shakes his head. Switch. As if you hadn't had enough from men who were two-faced, Seonghwa hides his eyes, turning into an inscrutable being again. A stranger. A stranger who's groping your cunt from the front, making your groin tense up and push him closer from the back. You're wrapping him with your legs and holding onto him tightly, when he catches a breath.

"Meaningless things,” he pants and throws you over the door, your arms landing on the frail sink in front of you. The mirror expands and all of the sudden you see yourself in full quality, in all your glory and Seonghwa is only supporting you from the back. His hand is grabbing your chin and pushing it up to the mirror, his pointing finger smudging your lip. With your lips slightly opened, it just makes sense to you to lick around his finger and look at him with a demanding look, eyebrows sultrily pushed together.

"Fuck, Y/N," Seonghwa gulps and cups your breast from behind, massaging it, while he presses his hot lips on your back. "Can I eat you out? Please,” he sighs and you take his finger in, lubing it up with your saliva.

"Do whatever you fucking want," you sneer and balance yourself with two hands on the sink, as Seonghwa raises a leg and throws it over his shoulder, his pretty face planted into your pussy the second you've given him permission to. You spasm to the front, Seonghwa's hair tickling your lower abdomen, as he works his tongue over your slick folds. If his tongue was great for kissing, it's certainly great for cunnilingus too, no, maybe even better suited for it. He's reaching spots that haven't been reached by a tongue in a long time and with the wet muscle working in and out inside you, you're becoming a moaning mess with fluttering eyelids in no time.

"Fuuuck", you gasp, when Seonghwa kneads your ass that's extended out in the air. The sound of his slurping and the music outside assimilate and mix up, and if it wasn't for the hightened senses you got from your molly-influence, it feels like everything is hammering you down from the outside. You can feel each twitch of Seonghwa's mouth, how he smiles, how he's yelping for air, how he's licking over his lips — you're going to fall somewhere, and if it's not into the cheap sink and the mirror that's taunting you, it's in love with his tongue that’s going to make you cum.

"So soon?", Seonghwa murmurs, and two fingers begin to penetrate your gaping hole, as he flicks his tongue over your sensitive clit.

"Fuck, fuck!", you whine and Seonghwa takes note of how your entrance is tightening around him, angling his fingers towards your g-spot. "So fucking good!", you breathe and you're trying to get a glimpse of your mirrored image in front of you, but your eyes are rolling to the back of your head too much.

"Mhm~", Seonghwa hums with an amused tone, repeating a cycle of sucking and licking, pumping against your g-spot. You're flying, the loud tunes bombarding the walls of the porta-potty are slowly getting to your head and intrusing what's left of your conscious mind, only feeling the tickling sensation that is being eaten out by none other than Park Seonghwa.

Until it stops.

You were whining, announcing your impending orgasm, but he apparently had other ideas, pulling out his fingers and removing his lips from you the second you were drawing together your body, preparing for sweet release. "Don't fucking stop!", you yell and grab Seonghwa by his hair, pushing him closer to your cunt by force. "Seonghwa!"

Seonghwa, who you don't know if he seriously just wanted to be called by his name in this situation, chuckles in witticism and wraps his arm around your thigh, getting the other leg over his shoulder too. You're sitting up front now, and there is no space for him to get his finger anywhere near your cunt, but his tongue is more than enough.

"Make me cum or I'm gonna fucking leave, you fucking asshole," you growl and grip a big chunk of his hair to get your message across. The man below you moans and resumes his job, clearly attracted by your lust-driven dominance. 'I like it when you're bossy', you re-call, and before you can finish the quote in your head, Seonghwa has plunged his tongue into your cunt.

"Ungh, fuck!", you moan, a bit more sensitive and distorted this time. Trying to hold your heavy upper body straight, Seonghwa is laving at your cunt, driving you crazy with the speed of his tongue maneuvering inside you. Maybe it was better that Seonghwa edged you, because now every flick is shooting you further into the abyss of pleasantry. "Fuck, fuck, fuck, fuck," you stutter, the second wave of the overwhelming euphoria gathering itself like a tsunami.

Seonghwa is more relaxed than you are, though his whole face is busy being used to pleasure you. His nose is dug into your clit and he's shaking his head around to be able to tickle it all during the while he's cutting away his breath to pant into your heat and spreading your slick on his tastebuds.

"Make me cum," you whine, "make me cum with your tongue!"

"Say 'please Seonghwa'," Seonghwa smirks and has the tip of his tongue placed on your clitoris just enough for your orgasm to not be washed away, but definitely not coming, while you grip more of his hair.

"You fucking bitch, I'll never fucking—", you pant, but there's no other way around it. You need this orgasm. "You—"

Seonghwa looks up to you and you can see him waiting. Pushing your thighs together because he annoys you so much, you yank his head closer to your cunt and scream, "okay, fuck, make me fucking cum, Seonghwa, please!"

The man between your thighs chuckles through his nose and once you said the magic-words, he opens his mouth back open to lap around your clit and cunt like a mad dog. Having been denied your orgasm for the second time, the third attempt to chase it down hits you even more, making you breathe heavily and loudly, and this time, the strings are pulling you to total stupification.

"Please, please, please, Seonghwa, please—"

Repeating the words Seonghwa wants to hear so bad again and again, you're fuelling his decision to finally allow you to come. His tongue circles around your clit as if he was racing with the music and your face is parallel to the floor, when your body goes lax and the strands of Seonghwa's hair are the only thing keeping you up.

"Seonghwa, please," you whisper again, weak, and almost sent over the top, while Seonghwa growls under you, his tongue stroking over your sensitive bud until you're shaking and pressing your legs together. "Fuck!", you scream out and Seonghwa throws one leg away from his shoulder, your wobbly foot landing on the floor, when the male stands up and gets to fingers into your cunt.

"Seonghwa, please—", you gasp, when he rams them into your throbbing arousal that barely reached its high and you have to get your arms around his neck if your knees are still worth something to you. "Oh my fucking god," and other moans come spurred out of you and Seonghwa bites into your shoulder to add another stimulative pain to all the sensations you're feeling.

His fingers are long and slender and for all you can grasp, they know what they're doing, when they're driving in and out with no mercy. That this is Seonghwa, you don't really care, that this isn't San, you do just a little bit, but "caring" takes a bit too long in the brain anyway. If your first orgasm from his tongue made your head fly, the second one is evaporating it. Your head feels light and corrupted by the DJ screaming inaudible things into his set, an artificially deepened laughing-track following his ad-lib and your lower body is trembling like a new-born deer, when Seonghwa keeps pushing against your soft patch inside. “Stop— stop, Seonghwa—“, you pant and your legs hold Seonghwa's wrist until he wiggles it out.

"You good?", Seonghwa laughs. He walks behind you and raises your face by your chin, pressing his own cheek next to yours, so both of your faces are seen in the mirror, his pelvis pushed against your ass again.

"Uh-huh," you shudder, your runny mascara making your eyes sticky, "very good."

He smiles, though it's definitely not a friendly smile. This isn't what friends do. It never will be something that friends do and you try to find some type of sanity behind your sunken irises, but there's nothing there. There is someone knocking on the door, Seonghwa's phone is vibrating in his pants, and like the bad person you are, you can't stop to wish that behind at least one of these interruptions is a certain someone is waiting for you, asking for you or anything— fuck. It's worse Seonghwa somehow knows what you're thinking, taking out his phone with his free hand, your face still being cupped by the other.

"You think this is him, don't you?", he asks and lets his temple drop against the top of your head, "Let's bet."

"If you think I'm gonna bet on something like that," you hiss and grind your bare ass against his clothed cock to distract him from the fact he's correct, “you’re a fucker.”

"I'm gonna fuck you, so I don't know where you're coming from here."

You scoff and throw his phone into the sink, when Seonghwa seemingly opens the message and starts to grin.

"Seonghwa," and you know you're lying through your teeth here with the full awareness that Seonghwa probably knows that you’re lying as well, "I want you," and yet you have the very secure feeling that you got into his head.

"Hm, what?", he asks and looks confused, unable to be angry that you snatched his phone out of his hand. You smirk for a short time and lean into his hand that's stroking your cheek. "I want you, Seonghwa," you sigh and pout. If you can't commit, you might as well commit to the lie, right? Be a little opportunistic.

"I don't care about San," you whisper and Seonghwa pulls down his glasses, making him human again.

"Really now…”

Choi San: the connection is so bad Choi San: where are you right now?

You nod and there’s a black-tinted tear rolling down your cheek, warm and melting on your skin. Seonghwa takes his thumb and glides it over the flow and holds his hand at your cheek again.

Choi San: i saw her Choi San: wtf she looked so different

You both saw the message and you both decided to ignore it. It doesn't matter anymore, his hand was already between your legs, your arousal has already coated his fingers.

That's how this works.

His touch, caressing your woeful face, his eyes pitying your pain. He's still erected, definitely impatient, but Seonghwa has something that you haven't experienced for a long time. You don't want to think of it, you can't think of it, because it might just be an illusion, but when Seonghwa slides his arms around your waist and pulls you closer to him, you have to suppress the suffocating feeling that you must never see this man ever again, if you don't want to carry this burden with you. You can't tell yourself enough, you do not want Seonghwa.

But it's nice.

"Look at yourself, Y/N. Look how pretty you are."

It's nice to know that someone wants you. That someone cares to wipe away the tears from your eyes, though they're not tears formed by a sadness you’d be able to express, a sadness that encourages you to hold eye contact with yourself, as Seonghwa whispers words of comfort into your ear. "Don't cry, pretty girl," he murmurs, and it feels like the music is being subdued around you. You've fallen from grace. “You could have anything in the world..”

How nice would it be, if he was right? You’re not sad, you have everything you could, don’t you? It could be this is just another lie you're going to commit to to protect yourself, but Seonghwa is holding you by your throat, cutting your airflow. The blood curdles in your head and while the male behind you is opening up his pants, the phone blinks.

Seonghwa and you both look down. Incoming call: Choi San.

"Oh," Seonghwa exhales and immediately checks for your reaction in the mirror, but your expression is empty. The drugs are fogging your mind and there is no ounce of vitality behind your eyes.

Seonghwa turns the phone around. "Fuck me first, Seonghwa," you tell him, your voice wispy, barely understandable, he probably had to lip-read in order to understand what you were saying, "let's get it over with."

He doesn't appreciate your dismissive tone, but Seonghwa is too horny to say anything against it, pushing you over the sink, grabbing his cock and placing it near your cunt. While your abdomen is pressed against the dirty, cold surface, Seonghwa is murmuring something under his breath and gliding his hot, throbbing erection across your pulsating folds. "I don't care at all," you whine, trying to convince yourself and ignore the continuous buzzing from his phone, but also make him hurry up. There's an end-goal you're chasing here.

"Kiss me," you order the male behind you, and as he finally positions his tip at your entrance, Seonghwa tilts your head to the side, ripping your gaze away from his mobile. "You really like kissing, don't you?", he huffs and smirks, pushing himself into you in one slow thrust. "Fuuuck," you breathe, feeling your walls expand for his length, "what about it?"

"I just think it's sweet. It makes it more personal, doesn't it?"

"Come on, Hwa, are you trying to make me angry again? I'm getting tired here," you purl and visibly roll your eyes at him, your eyelids getting heavier with each word that's spoken out loud. Your body weighs into Seonghwa's arms and if he doesn't hurry up, you'll fall asleep, your pulsating cunt tightening around his girth.

"Sweetheart, let me talk," he says, in a soft voice that makes your heart drop. You don't want him, you don't want his sweetness, fuck, you only wanted Seonghwa for this one night, for his dick and dick only, why is he trying to get inside your head? Don't do it, you try to mouth to him. You don't know him, he doesn't know you, his cock is inside your cunt, this is the worst timing to—

"You're something else."

"Seonghwa, stop, before you say anything too nice. Just close your mouth, this isn't good for both of us, you already said we're bad people. You know we don't want this," you mutter and start moving your ass to somehow get his mind elsewhere, but through his whimpers and low moans, Seonghwa won't stop grunting under the influence.

"No, speak for god-damn yourself, because, shit, Y/N, I can't watch it anymore, okay? Every day and night— You come over and let yourself be played by San, that fucking asshole, and I just think—"

"Seonghwa, shut the fuck up!", you scream and you're a breath away from pulling his cock out your cunt and leave this place naked, but just when you thought you can't do it anymore, Seonghwa has gotten his hands on your hips, digging his fingernails into your skin as if he's trying to hopelessly keep you close, his pelvis clapping against your ass, as he strikes into you.

Surprised, you moan and your fingers slip against the edge of the sink, strands of your hair falling in front of your face. You weren't prepared for that kind of vigor.

"Don't you dare think I'm that pathetic," he growls and thrusts into you with force in a rhythm that is terrifyingly close to the music outside, his cock slamming against your inner wall, making your legs close up by themselves.

"I'm not thinking I could treat you better," Seonghwa huffs and gets the hair away from your face, grabbing your hair to clear up your view, "I'm thinking what a fucking cockslut you are, Y/N."

Drugs never make sad people happier. Never make broken people whole.

So even when Seonghwa makes you realize that none of the men in your life have ever taken you serious, a hoarse laugh leaves your mouth, and you tilt your head to the back to examine the traces of them on your neck. Your eyes glisten with the way you're being fucked from behind and your mouth is not closing, you've lost control over yourself a long time ago, and it's not when this long day started with you in San's bed, it's when he took off your shirt on that random night during exam season.

"You're lucky you're pretty," he grunts and you chuckle, smiling absent-minded, upper body see-sawing with Seonghwa's pelvis-movement. Your ass is slowly hurting from how hard he is driving himself in, but you're too busy looking at your neck.

Red, red, red. A little bit of purple. A big patch here, small spots over there; anyone could look at you and would know that you've been claimed by someone. Maybe even think that you're, gasp, in a relationship! They wouldn't guess it was two people to leave these hickeys, and frankly, they would be right to think you're claimed by one person only.

"San said he'd fuck me stupid," you giggle— you're fetching old memories from your mind, re-painting the colors, completing the gaps like a mandala; the same memories from the older days which you wouldn't call better, but certainly easier; from days where you didn't have to worry about a man breaking your heart.

Seonghwa scoffs and grabs you by your tit, pulling your nipple with harsh tugs, the sensitive, delicate nub being wounded by his aggressiveness. He's stopped being gentle a long time ago, leaving a big star-shaped mark on your ass by clapping the surface of his hand.

"San said I'm his whore," you reminisce, biting your teeth through the pain, and Seonghwa is speeding up his thrusting, his cock angled inside you to entirely fill out your tight space.

"San said—"

Seonghwa has had enough. He's pressing the surface of his hand onto your mouth and nose, silencing you, cutting you short of your air, your eyes rolling back, but it doesn't prevent your thoughts to continue tumbling down. Seonghwa may be jolting his hips into you like his life depends on it, and in a way, that may be true, but he'll never pleasure you like San could.

People-pleaser. San said he was a people-pleaser.

You don't remember the orgasm, you don't remember Seonghwa's loud grunt into your ear, you don't remember how much hot cum he ejaculated into you, how panicked the black-haired was, when he asked you whether you took the pill, how quickly he became sober and put his clothes back on, the speed of time seemingly passing like a rocket-ship, the music never stopping to blitz into your brain, how the porta-potty became really fucking empty, once Seonghwa left it, but what you do remember is how you took his phone that he forgot like the dumb-ass he was, and how weak your voice sounded, when you answered San's call that by some magical way, kept ringing in.

"Can you come fetch me?"

"Who is this?"

"Come fetch me, please."

"Y/N?"

And people-pleasers should do anything to keep their people happy.

Especially if they're Choi San and avoidant of conflict.

part 4: coming soon!

#choi san smut #choi san x reader #ateez smut #ateez x reader #choi san scenarios #choi san x y/n #choi san x you #park seonghwa smut #park seonghwa scenarios #park seonghwa x reader #park seonghwa x y/n #haveyourwaywithwordsbemypeoplepleaser #chokkiwa

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captain-joongz · 2 months

Text

Abraxas; Interlude I

Pairing: mafia boss!Min Yoongi x police officer!reader

Genre: angst, humour and some fluff, investigative, dark themes, slowburn, eventual smut

Chapter summary: Amidst a possible scheme against him and his organisation, Yoongi also has to also deal with the new and quite ambitious police officer. But why does he find himself so reluctant to?

Word count: cca 13.5k

Warnings: Yoongi POV! , discussion of illegal activities, drugs, tailing/stalking, mentions of death and blood, allusions to murder and drug deals

Series masterlist | Previous part | Next part

A/N: it's Yoongi's POV!!! yes i'm on the midnight sun trend hehe. sorry for the slight delay, but here it is in all its glory, hopefully you'll enjoy this chapter too ^^

I threw back the remnants of my whiskey and sighed with the pleasant burn. I wasn’t exactly having the best evening and I entirely blamed Jimin for it. And Tae too, he wasn’t about to get off scot-free. I wasn’t even supposed to be in Dynamite tonight and the incessant buzzing of my phone in my pocket kept reminding me that I was sorely needed in The Rose to deal with a difficult customer.

The longer I stood in the hallway leaning against a wall waiting for Taehyung to show up, the more nervous and pissier I was growing. Someone kept blowing up my phone as if that was going to get me there faster, when I had to take over from Namjoon to deliver these documents and Taehyung was late. I tapped my foot on the floor impatiently and hypnotised the corner leading to back to the club with my eyes. It was just one of those nights.

Ten minutes later I finally lost my patience and made my way back into the main room and beelined straight for the bar.

“Hyung,” Yeonjun greeted me as soon as I got there and automatically reached for my favourite whiskey, “Rough night?” I just hummed, too frustrated by the absolute shitstorm today was to keep up the friendly chatter.

“Some fucker’s tearing apart The Rose because Jimin messed up and Tae’s late,” I grumbled and accepted the glass gratefully. I kicked it back in a single gulp and handed the glass back along with the folder of documents. Yeonjun looked at it confused but accepted it nonetheless.

“Give this to Taehyung once he finally gets here, thanks,” I said and immediately turned to leave. It didn’t sit well with me leaving it here just like that, but Yeonjun was trustworthy, the kid’s proven himself a few times since he started working the bar here, so I at least felt a little consoled by that. And if he did try to fuck me over, I knew who I left it with last, so it would be fucking stupid.

My phone started buzzing again, but this time it was a phone call. Jimin. I gritted my teeth and moved back to the empty hallway to take it.

“Hyung, please, Mr. Cho is going to kill me,” Jimin pleaded immediately, “He’s been asking for you for the past 30 minutes.”

“You were the one that messed up his order, Jimin,” I said irritated, “You should deal with it.” There was a beat of silence which allowed me to hear the distant screaming in the background.

“I know, hyung, I’m sorry, it won’t happen again,” the blond man answered, and he sounded so genuinely remorseful, I didn’t have it in myself to keep scolding him. I let out a sigh and took it a bit easier on him.

“I told you to check the goods,” I chided him a bit more gently, “and to make sure you’re working with reliable sources. You sold him subpar shit for the full price. We can’t have that happening at The Rose.”

“I know, hyung,” Jimin repeated, and I could hear his pout through the phone, “I’m going to deal with Dongwook once I’m done here.” I smiled a little at that. Jimin often fooled people into thinking he’s soft and weak with his angelic looks, but he was a force to be reckoned with once crossed. So many have tried to fuck him over thinking he’s the weakest link only to be very painfully proven wrong by him.

“Take Kookie with you, I think he’s with Namjoon right now,” I told him simply, much less angry than when the conversation started. I checked my watch again. Taehyung was still nowhere to be seen, even though he told me he’d be here almost a half hour ago. Jimin on the other side of the phone just hummed.

“Do you know where Taehyung is?” I asked him, some frustration making it back into my voice, “I’m going to have to teach him what 30 minutes mean.” Jimin started answering but was cut off by aggressive knocking on a door somewhere in his background.

“Oh no,” he just said, “That’s definitely Mr. Cho. When are you going to get here?” I sighed and pinched the root of my nose.

“Put him on the phone,” I told him and leaned fully on the wall to prepare myself for this. There was some shuffling, muffled screaming, then the door opened and suddenly I could hear the man yelling at full volume. Jimin told him something and it made him calm down a little. Then I could hear heavy breathing.

“Mr. Min,” Cho growled into the receiver, “Explain yourself. I paid full buck for this shit, it’s barely consumable. I gave it to my boys and they barely even touched it.”

“Calm down Mr. Cho,” I said calmly, “Jimin made a mistake by not checking it over, but there seems to be some attempt from our suppliers to fuck us over. We’re thoroughly investigating it now, my apologies. If you could wait a few days, I’ll get you your usual. And a guaranteed discount on the next batch.” Technically, I wasn’t even lying. There was an attempt to fuck us over, only they weren’t our usual suppliers, they were some ghouls Jimin was trying out. I warned him to be sure they’re trustworthy and he assured me everything was under control. Sure seems like it…

“Fine,” Mr. Cho finally gritted out, “You’re so fucking lucky your services are otherwise top-tier, or else I’d you have you swimming with the fish.” I fought to supress a scoff. Mr. Cho has always been like this, all bark no balls. He loved to threaten others as if he had some power, but all he had was a hefty inheritance that has thinned considerably through the years he spent getting high in my clubs. Always quick to blow up and throw his name around, but calmed down the moment he spoke to me cause he knew I wouldn’t tolerate his bullshit.

Jimin fucking hated him and hated dealing with him, cause he’d always get yelled at for everything, but it would get resolved the moment I’d get involved even though I said the same thing Jimin did just moments before me. Mr. Cho would always grumble and make vague threats, but ultimately go with it cause he knew if one of us had the power to make people disappear in the river, it was definitely me. That’s why I occasionally took the time to remind him of his place.

“Be careful with your words, Mr. Cho, to some they could be taken as a provocation,” I warned him with a faux friendly tone, “Give the phone back to Jimin.” The order was clear, and Mr. Cho didn’t even argue more, thoroughly settled and not interested in getting into more trouble. There was some shuffling and then Jimin was back on the line.

“Hyung, thank you,” he heaved a sigh of relief as the door slammed shut on his side, “He just left. I don’t fucking understand why he always needs to hear from you when I tell him the same shit. What did you tell him anyway? He deflated like a carnival balloon.” Jimin chuckled a little and I hummed.

“The usual stuff,” I answered vaguely, “I gotta go now. If you hear from Taehyung, tell him he’s dead meat.” With that I hung up and went back to the bar.

Only, I stopped dead in my tracks on the way over. There, sitting on a bar looking incredibly out of place in plain t-shirt and jeans, sipping on a drink and watching the dancefloor with intense displeasure, was a quite familiar face.

Immediately on my return from the station last week I had Jungkook run a background check on the new officer in the force. I was surprised I managed to miss they got a newbie, but now I was as familiar with her as she was with me. What I didn’t expect though, was running into her in one of my clubs. I took a moment to watch her, coming up with a strategy on how to deal with this. Either she’s here undercover or she’s a naughty cop and wants something. And finding out which one would infinitely improve my day.

Mood instantly better at the prospect, I made my way over to her side. Looking back, I had no idea I was about to step into something that changed the course of my entire life.

In terms of first meetings, it was a tense one. Surprisingly, I found her quite easy to read, with her pursed lips in annoyance and fire in her eyes. She had the aura of a new young cop, eager to prove themselves, eager to solve all crime. It made me want to mess with her.

Every fibre of her being just screamed ambition and conviction, and even though I could see her naivety, I sensed the sharp edge that she was carrying inside. I knew, this was a person that has fought for everything, and they would continue to claw their way up until they tore themselves a piece of the world they deserved. In shock I realised I saw a little bit of my younger self in her, which forced a surprised laugh out of me. We both strived for different things, but I recognised the emotion with startling clarity.

Maybe that was what led me to talking more openly than I usually did. But somewhere deep down I needed her to understand. The world isn’t what she wants it to be, especially not in these parts. The sooner she would realise that the easier it would be to swallow.

Really, I shouldn’t even have been surprised when one day Jungkook came into my office with a tablet in hand and a serious look on his face. I immediately turned away from my notebook and leaned to the side, preparing myself for whatever he had to show me.

When the tablet finally did make it in front my face, it was a picture of a black, old and slightly banged up car. The car that we’ve noticed cruising suspiciously around a little too much. Jungkook’s tattooed finger swiped right and the next picture showed a close up of a driver taken probably from some nearby security camera. It was our little friendly neighbourhood police officer.

I smirked to myself. So, it seems she does not in fact know how to step away from things that might prove to be a little too much for someone with her ambition. I hummed to myself a little, not knowing whether I was disapproving or impressed at her continued ignorance despite my warnings.

Jungkook swiped one last time to a document showing the license plate being registered to her name. I laughed and leaned back, making myself comfortable in the chair. Jungkook, on the other hand, sighed and put the tablet away.

“What do you wanna do about that?” he asked seemingly neutral, but I knew the look on his face. It was the kind of disapproval I saw in him often when police force was involved. He believed I should be more careful and not toe the line with the detectives this much. Jungkook already knew I wouldn’t ask for him to deal with it, but that I would let things progress naturally, and he was preparing himself for swallowing the order down even though his opinions differed.

“Jungkookie…” I sighed, “What am I supposed to say when you look at me like that?” I teased him gently, giving him a little smile.

“Hyung, you know how I feel about this,” he explained softly, looking a little more like a kid when he pursed his lips like that. I often felt guilty about pulling him into this shit all those years ago, no matter how much Jimin insisted the kid’s okay with it, that’s why I always treasured those moments when it was just the two of us, when Jungkook would stop being the mad dog protecting a criminal and go back to a youngster playing around with his hyung. I patted his shoulder and tried to look as reassuring as possible.

“It’s fine, Jungkookie,” I assured him, “I’m not gonna get in trouble.” He looked at me like a kid that already knew the Santa wasn’t real and felt insulted his parents still tried to bullshit him every Christmas.

“You’re playing with fire too much,” Jungkook answered petulantly, “You’re making my job infinitely more difficult.” I sighed and stood up. Jungkook had a sudden growth spurt some years ago and now towered over me like a mountain, so I found myself looking up even though I wanted to console him. I gently clasped my hands over both of his shoulders and smiled again.

“It’s going to be okay,” I whispered, “I swear. I know what I’m doing.” He frowned but ultimately said nothing.

“Let her be for some time,” I ended up declaring after a moment of silence, “I want to know what she’s doing. What she wants to know. Then we decide what to do next.” Jungkook tensely nodded and looked out of the window with a grumpy face. I laughed at him a little and patted his head. That set his mood a little better.

“Do you think they’re back to tailing us?” he asked eventually. I had gone back to looking over the email I had been in the middle of answering, so I looked up at the younger man surprised he chose to continue with the subject.

“Hard to say,” I hummed thoughtfully, “I don’t think so. She’s not using the official police car, but hers. I bet she’s on her own.” I wondered what she was trying to do, following me for days. With a slight smile I looked out of the window and zeroed in on her car parked a little ways away from the building, but still within eyesight.

What game are you playing, officer?

In the end Jungkook didn’t let me allow her to stalk us longer than a few days before he started pushing me to deal with it properly. There wasn’t a clear read of what her goal was, which disappointed me a little. I doubt she was in it just to follow me around and watch me run errands, but maybe I was expecting a little more than she actually planned on achieving. I didn’t know why that bummed me out so much and I didn’t want to dwell on it, lest I start sinking into some uncomfortable realisations.

I was aware that part of this sudden sympathy was coming from knowing her personal history, and I couldn’t have that. Not when her story was so similar to my boys, not when it made me soft while dealing with potential danger to everything we worked so hard for.

She was the other side of the coin of kids growing up on the street – you either end up a criminal or the police. Her injustice made her want to solve everything wrong with this world. Our injustice made us realise the perfect way to exploit a broken system. But really, we were both one and the same, born from the same mud and moulded by the same violence.

In some way, it made it even harder for me to understand how she could stand on the side of the law.

But in the end, I did have to deal with it. Except I wouldn’t. Few days later when I was sitting in my office with clear view of her car and Jungkook’s burning eyes throwing daggers my way, I decided it was time to test her a little. Just a little push wouldn’t hurt.

I went out the side door, the one I knew she wasn’t aware of so I could give her a little surprise. And I wasn’t disappointed. Laughing at her frustration was easy, toying with her notebook and watching her nervously eye me was easy, teasing her was easy, and before I knew it, it slipped out.

“Good job. Try a bit harder next time, though.”

The second I said it I knew Jungkook was absolutely going to whoop my ass and Namjoon will wholeheartedly agree that I deserve a good thrashing. But I also had my own game and the burning of her eyes when she internally cursed me out made me want to see where this one was going. I left with a pep in my step even though I felt Jungkook’s disapproving aura.

“Relax, Kookie,” I told him once we were comfortably sat in our car, “We just need to know where exactly she’s going with this.” The man just stared at me blankly before resigning on this.

“Fine, but if I think she’s getting too close, I’ll report her to the police for stalking and harassment,” he growled and sulked the entire rest of the way. I couldn’t even tell him not to do that, so I conceded on it. We both knew what the stakes were.

“We haven’t been visited by our blue friends in a while,” commented Taehyung one normal Saturday and thus cursed it into existence, as not even ten minutes later Jungkook got a call the cops are demanding entrance into Pied Piper.

I groaned and leaned my head on the top of the couch, as the two youngsters started bickering.

“You just had to fucking jinx it,” Jungkook whined and Taehyung laughed at him. “We were all thinking it!” was his defence while popping fruits in his mouth. I tried to just disappear into the sofa. Today I was not in the mood for the police at all.

“God, why now,” I allowed myself to whine out and pout a little, giving them a little rare cute display of displeasure. I was fucking exhausted, it was one hell of a week dealing with the mess Jimin made.

The rats were trying to dodge us and make a run for it, maybe seek help from one of our rival gangs, but I had Jimin and Hobi track them down before the end of the week. As usual, Hoseok worked his magic and found them within two days, but the problem was they already moved onto enemy turf. And if I didn’t want this to turn into a big mess, I had to bargain them out. So I spent the week going back and forth with the Kims. First I tried being nice, explaining to them I will deal with this and it will be easier for all involved if they just move over and let us do our thing, until I ultimately had to subtly threaten them to get the fuck out of my way or we burn our path through their ranks too. I had just enough of snarky interactions for one week.

I swore that once this has been dealt with, I would fucking tear Jimin into two and the man was very well aware of that, so he has been acting cute and sending me little gifts, teasingly telling me he’s “trying to get back into my good graces”. That did put a little smile on my face again, as I did have a huge soft spot for him, and gave me tiny bit of energy to deal with this tonight. I sighed. The sooner this is over the better. I resignedly gestured at Jungkook, and he immediately called back to allow them entry.

“I bet you 200 bucks the other half is trying to mess with the dinner the mayor planned for today in your hotel’s restaurant,” Taehyung said eagerly, moving closer to us to look at us expectantly. I looked towards Jungkook, too tired to play this game and kind of hoping for him to take the lead, but he only shrugged.

“Ugh, I think it might be The Rose,” I said eventually when the silence stretched on for too long, “they may have caught wind of the scene Mr. Cho made there.” We both looked at Jungkook again, but he didn’t say anything and just threw his hands up in an ‘I have no idea’ gesture.

Few minutes later the bouncer entered the balcony and behind him Jang and lo and behold – officer Lee, our righteous stalker, the warrior of broken laws. Immediately, my mood skyrocketed. Now this should be fun.

“Did we crash a funeral or what? What’s with the fits?”

That startled a laugh out of me. What an entrance. Out of the corner of my eye I could see Taehyung leaning forward in interest and immediately knew that these two, if given the chance, are going to be the biggest menaces and pains in my ass.

I’ll be honest, I did want to test her a little. Find out how strong her resolve actually is and how good she is at reading the room. While Jang pissed me off and kept his mouth running, I focused on her body language and facial expressions, which was a beautiful blend of resistance and nervousness. I thoroughly enjoyed the uneasiness with which she was watching everything around her, no doubt remembering our first official meeting. “No one is above the law”? Well, look at you now, officer. Unwittingly I smirked into my glass.

This time, I took my time to ease into the teasing and tested her reaction to little quips here and there. I knew she wouldn’t want me to go talking about the time she spent lurking in front of my office, ever since I confirmed her actions weren’t sanctioned by the department, so I tried an inconspicuous little remark about it.

I wasn’t disappointed.

It took me years to perfect “the stare”. The maknaes especially always made fun of it, but even they couldn’t deny it worked. While yes, part of it was an intimidation technique, but what I truly was interested in was the person’s reaction and, inevitably, when they met my eyes, what I would find reflected in them. Cowards wouldn’t meet my eyes at all, those who tried to put up a fight but ultimately would break under the pressure looked for a moment and then turned away or their eyes flitted around and never stayed on anything for too long. Shifty people who tried to fuck me over also had a specific look to them, I could tell just from a single glance that they were greasy motherfuckers not worth anyone’s while.

What I saw in her eyes when she looked at me head on, was pure fire. For a moment I lamented that she wasn’t on our side, because I would kill to recruit someone like this for us. She was playing it well, and even though I could see her discomfort, there was weight to her stare, and a challenge. From the corner of my eye, I could see Taehyung watching her with rapt interest and even Jungkook seemed to pay more attention. They knew about the trials I sometimes put people through, and would no doubt ask me after the police left what I had seen.

I smiled and relaxed. I could see Taehyung do the same while he leisurely sipped on his margarita. He undeniably already knew. Very well then, for now we would continue playing this game. I even found myself quite eager to see what was in store for us in the next few weeks.

It’s not that the other policemen were bad or lacking, well, some of them were, but particularly Park and Jang, who I’ve seen the most around, they weren’t exactly bad at their job. Just… Park was a little too old-school, he was intelligent and experienced, but left lagging behind the modern world. His eyes spoke of an upright but boring man, a jerk but one that couldn’t care less about some clown sitting in an expensive suit in a club he owned spouting bullshit. That’s why I did quite like the man, I could respect him to some extent, despite everything.

Jang on the other hand, my dislike for him knew no bounds. He was a slimy little shifty fucker, all polite smiles and acting decent, but I’ve dealt with enough scumbags to know not to trust a guy like that. There was something about him that rubbed me the wrong way and made me wary of him; honestly, I was just waiting for him to slip up to deal with him.

When they left, just as I expected, Taehyung leaned towards me and whispered: “So that was quite good.” I hummed and kept my eyes trained on the stairs. Jungkook had left to deal with the situation at the office, where presumably Namjoon had been going through another impromptu interview, so we were the only ones left in the club.

“It was definitely interesting,” I answered finally. This time it was Taehyung that hummed.

“So it’s safe to say we’re not getting rid of her that easily,” he mused out loud in between chomping on strawberries and sipping on a fresh drink. I snorted and looked at him. I gestured at Soobin, who was left here by Jungkook to supervise over me until he either returns or I go home, and he nodded and made his way back to the bar to get me another whiskey.

“No, I think we’ve only just begun.”

I finally checked my phone to see a few messages from Joon and surprisingly even one from Hobi. I scanned through Namjoon’s, which could be summed up to “police showed up, don’t worry I have everything under control”. I wasn’t too sure what Park was trying to achieve by this, but I trusted Namjoon to deal with these things completely. We’ve been by each other’s side for as long as I could remember and we’ve seen it all together, I knew his capabilities and there wasn’t anything the police could do to move him.

Taking the fresh whiskey from Soobin who had just returned, I opened the chat with Hobi. His message was short, simple and perfectly ominous.

Hope, 19:22: got em hyung, me w/ boys gonna deal with it 2nite

I smiled and sipped the cool drink, at long last able to fully relax into the couch and just let the background hum of music lull me into a state of comfortable calm. At least one thing would be handled. Next to me I could hear Taehyung make mindless conversation with Soobin, but at that point I was already half asleep. With a slight smirk on my lips, I took another sip and knew. No one would fuck with me.

“Is it just me or we haven’t seen our little detective in a while?” Tae asked while leisurely lying on a sofa in my office. Seokjin turned to him and then back to me to gauge my reaction. I made sure to keep my face neutral as I returned his stare.

“Last time you said that they showed up like ten minutes later,” I murmured looking out of the window on the snowy streets as if expecting the police van to materialise out of thin air.

“Yeah, well, she hasn’t been around for a hot minute,” Taehyung reiterated, his eyes jumping between his two hyungs and waiting would take the bait and entertain him with a conversation, “There was a week when hyung couldn’t even piss without her knowing about it.”

“Why are you so interested in that?” Seokjin asked neutrally, leaned against a bookshelf on the wall opposite of the sofa, “All I hear from Jungkook is grumbling that Yoongi’s being stupid and it’s a safety concern.” I scoffed and looked back towards the two men.

“It’s hardly that,” I said calmly, “I don’t know what he’s expecting me to do, she’s still the police. She’s breaking the laws, yes, which is hilarious by the way, but I’m not petty enough to go through the whole ordeal of reporting her just for sniffing around our business a little.” Seokjin gave me a look, a look that was so specific to him and exactly what I’d been afraid of, that I just dodged his eyes for my own sanity. I hoped Taehyung would keep his mouth shut because Jin, even though he acted silly a lot of the times, had the clairvoyant gift of perfectly guessing what was going through our heads at any given moment. I quickly spun around and averted his gaze despite the fact that it made me look even more suspicious. I just had to keep him from saying anything while Taehyung was still here, because the younger man could not keep himself from telling all the hyungs and Jungkook everything and I had no intention of being discussed like that.

“When is Hobi getting here?” I decided to change the subject. There was a moment of silence, and I could almost see Jin sending Tae warning glances to not bring it up anymore even though I had my back turned to them.

“He should be here in a few,” Seokjin answered at last and brought over to my table the cup of tea he was making, “It’s supposed to be a calming mix. It might not do much, but it’s better than whiskey.” I thanked him politely and the room slipped into silence again as I sipped it slowly while Jin watched me like a hawk.

Suddenly there was a groan coming from the sofa and Taehyung was clambering to his feet. “I can’t fucking take it anymore, I’m so bored,” he whined and skipped over to my table, “hyungs, let’s do something.” He did the thing when he tried to be cute (he was cute, but I made it my personal goal to never tell him or he’ll take advantage of it), started pouting and grabbed my shoulder lightly.

“Go take a walk then, he needs a moment of rest,” Jin told him resolutely. He clearly decided not to fall for it today, even though he usually indulged the younger man. “After all, that’s why I’m here in the first place.”

Taehyung dropped the cutesy act and teasingly scowled at him before walking back over to the sofa to grab his phone. He just jokingly whined “You can be so mean, hyung” and was gone out the door before anyone could reply anything.

Once the door shut closed, Jin’s full attention suddenly was on me, and I grew a little nervous. He wouldn’t let anything slide and took his role as a doctor and a hyung very seriously, especially since he was the only one who was older than me and thus had a little bit of authority over my stubborn ass. I knew that Jin and Namjoon often consulted each other on how to approach me, Joon would oftentimes notice something and immediately snitch to Jin cause he knew Jin was the only one I allowed to care for me in such a capacity. It wasn’t unusual that Namjoon would raise a concern about my health, and I would tell him it’s nothing, only to have Jin coming to my house later that day, fully informed and prepared to deal with it (and me).

“How’s your migraines been?” Jin decided to play it safe at first, dancing around what he actually wanted to ask.

“Shit,” I replied dryly and squinted my eyes at him. He looked at me with worry and I sighed. “It’s been getting better,” I begrudgingly told him, and he gave me a look a parent gives their annoying child.

“You need to rest more,” Jin started, and I groaned. Once he got into full parent mode and began nagging, nothing could stop him. Poor Kookie had to listen to a 30-minute-long lecture about the risks of smoking every time he only looked in a direction of a cigarette pack, which then almost every time moved on to us for being bad influence on him. Especially Namjoon who was basically glued to a cigarette. I have over the years got out of the habit and now mostly smoked only occasionally, much to Jin’s content.

“I know, I know,” I stopped him and started imitating him, “I need to sleep more and eat better and drink less alcohol, work less and have other hobbies other than hanging out around bars.” Jin gave me an unimpressed look and pursed his lips.

“So sorry for caring for your measly pathetic life, Mr. Bossman,” he retorted sassily and went to sit down on the sofa. Then he pierced me with his eyes again and I knew there was no running from this.

“So what’s all this about?” he asked and I started speaking basically even before he finished. “Nothing.” Jin raised his eyebrow and relaxed into the couch. “Really now?”

“Yes, no matter what Kookie says, I know what I’m doing,” I said resolutely and gave Jin a look that made it clear we would not be speaking on this matter anymore. That softened the man a little and he relented.

“Okay then,” he said softly and smiled at me, “I trust you, Yoongi. I’m just trying to make sure you’re all safe. I would be a fool not to worry about the police.” While I accepted it was a slight dig at my approach to this, I also knew it was the closest I would get to Jin conceding and leaving this subject behind. I smiled at him with all the charm and charisma I could muster, and he just scoffed at me and busied himself with his own mug of tea.

Though I was also a little surprised, just as Taehyung, at the sudden absence of detective Lee. She was everywhere for a whole week and then just suddenly disappeared, but I was anticipating some sort of new plan was abrewing on her part. I supposed it wouldn’t take too long.

“What do you mean they’re messing with the docks?” I growled into the phone and stomped the cigarette butt into the ground. Namjoon next to me tensed up and also put down his cig only to immediately light up a new one. Hobi on the other side of the phone sighed and apologized.

“It seems that when we stormed them last month some little creative critters managed to slip by us,” the man explained over phone, “They’ve been sabotaging in the docks, stealing cargo and ganging up on some workers here and there, but we’ve got them now. Gonna deal with it tonight.” I scoffed, mildly annoyed but not wanting to take it out on him. Still, I couldn’t stop a little petty remark.

“Funny, I think I already heard that from you once,” I said gruffly and looked over the street to where Jungkook’s car just pulled up. Namjoon waved at me, gestured towards the young man and then set out to welcome him and bring him up to my office.

“I know, hyung, I’m sorry for messing up the first time,” Hobi said with genuine remorse, and I felt like I was inside a one huge déjà vu as he sounded the same as Jimin when he apologised for causing this whole ordeal in the first place. I sighed and softened my voice. After all, this was just a bad month, I knew their abilities.

“It’s fine, I’m just annoyed with how persistent they’re becoming,” I explained to him and also slowly moved towards the office entrance, “who would have thought that they would be this hard to deal with?” Hobi laughed and I heard some shuffling noises from his side, slight murmuring and then a bang of a door.

“It’s good we’ve dealt with them now; they were on a good way to becoming unbelievable menaces. Thank god they trusted themselves enough to mess with us this early while still unprepared for the retaliation, or I bet we’d spend weeks slowly eradicating them like annoying pests.” I laughed at Hobi’s words and nodded even though he couldn’t see me.

“Hubris has a funny way of catching up to you,” I mused quietly, Hobi only humming and then suddenly exclaiming loudly.

“Oh! That’s right!” he shouted out suddenly making me flinch a little. “Christ, Hobi,” I grumbled, “You’re going to make me embarrass myself. What’s up?” The man laughed a little and continued.

“Kookie’s on his way with some very interesting footage you’ll want to see,” the man said mysteriously with a happy lilt to his voice, “We found it when checking the security cameras for the little fuckers messing with our cargo.” I hummed, secretly smiling at the younger man’s antics while waiting for the damn elevator to come to the ground floor.

“He just got here, he’s with Namjoon upstairs. I’m on my way up too,” I told him and finally stepped into the elevator.

“Oh, I better go then,” the man laughed, “I have my plate full here anyway.” With that he hung up and I spent the rest of the ride up building anticipation on what Jungkook wanted to show me.

Upon walking into the office, I found Jungkook already showing something to a smirking Namjoon sitting in my chair. I regarded them both with slight suspicion and then wordlessly made my way to stand next to Jungkook. He immediately put the tablet away and I frowned. He was just about to open his mouth to explain to me, but I beat him to it.

“Hobi already told me you found something on the CCTV, so you can just show me,” I told him gruffly and motioned for him to put the tablet back on the table. He did. With a few quick swipes of his tatted fingers, he presented to me a video. I squinted my eyes at a it a little bit cause it was so dark and hard to see, automatically leaning forward towards the tablet.

It was a view from one of the side alleys by the warehouse we’ve been having troubles with. I was well acquainted with this camera, it was so nicely installed it became practically invisible to anyone who already didn’t know it was there, thus over the years it procured us some very useful evidence. For a moment there was no movement, just a dark alleyway in one of the seedier parts of this city, but then a figure appeared out of the shadows. They were dressed in all black and were slowly slinking by the wall with their eyes trained on something in front of them. We watched it for a few seconds and then the figure turned around and left.

I was just about to question Jungkook, when the man swiped and an enhanced picture of the figure filled the screen. I leaned towards it for a moment and then laughed. It was detective Lee. The picture was grainy and dark, it was quite hard to see, but that was unmistakenly the rookie cop sniffing around.

“The warehouses? What is she doing in the docks?” I speculated out loud.

“I don’t know but I don’t like her sniffing around there,” Jungkook said resolutely, “She’s probably looking for evidence.” I hummed thoughtfully.

“Well, she would have to break into the offices and decode the documents, which would be highly illegal and inadmissible in court, so I doubt she would do that,” I retorted and finally pushed Namjoon out of my chair to sit down, “She’s most likely looking for something specific.” Namjoon leaned over the table and gave us a mischievous smile.

“Or someone specific,” he pointed out. We both looked at him and pondered over it. “She could be just getting the hang of our locations,” Jungkook mused, “I think it’s more probable she just wants to be familiar with the places that we own. Or she thinks we’re just doing illegal shit out in the daylight like a bunch of idiots.” I laughed at that, but the first part of the statement was definitely possible.

“We have to wait for a little more,” I told them both, “She’ll reveal her cards soon.” Jungkook gave me a look but said nothing. Namjoon was just watching us with a smile. I knew the younger man was getting antsy because he cared about my safety and this detective was getting closer than the others. But that was also her weakness – to get more info she abandoned the law, so while yes, she was more determined to find out, but also she was making herself more unreliable to the force and in the eyes of the court. It was a slippery slope for her.

The situation would need some supervision, for sure, but in the end we had the upper hand cause we could report her anytime and cost her the position in the force. I hummed again and smirked.

“We’ll deal with this shortly, don’t worry,” I attempted to soothe the man, “Right now we have to focus on the fiasco with these dealers.” At the change of subject both of the men perked up.

“Do you know anything about how Hobi-hyung wants to go about this?” Namjoon asked Jungkook. They were both standing at the opposite sides of my table looking at each other. Kookie deliberated a little before saying: “He didn’t say much, just that they’re doing it tomorrow. He’s pretty pissed they managed to dodge him, so he’s most probably not gonna be very nice.” To that both me and Namjoon laughed.

“Good,” I said, “They’ve been pissing me off too. Who would have known they would be such pests.”

All three of us shared a look. “Fucking cheers to that,” Jungkook said, and we moved on.

The next day I had gotten a single text from Hobi that sounded very similar to what he texted me last time he went after them. The plan was to surprise them during lunch, storm them quick and blindside them. Ideally it would be over before they ever realised something had hit them. And as someone who had seen Hobi in action before, I knew he was absolutely capable of that.

I was just smoking outside with Namjoon, who was making fun of me that I had gotten back into my habit the whole time he was attempting to light my cigarette, when I got another text.

Hope, 14:49: done

I smiled to myself and patted Joon’s shoulder. He gave me a confused look that melted into satisfied realisation when I winked happily.

Me, 14:51: are you absolutely sure? no more surprises?

Hope, 14:52: no more surprises. i’ll be over in twenty

I pocketed my phone again and stubbed out the cig, lightly slapped Joon’s shoulder again and moved to go back inside. The man followed after me without a word or a question, only gave me a celebratory smile when getting off the elevator a floor beneath my office.

I waited gingerly for the man’s arrival, drinks ready for us and words of gratitude on my tongue. Faithful to his word, he got there in twenty minutes on the dot, bursting into my door with a wide smile, no doubt also happy he managed to teach a lesson to some pesky kids messing about with things way beyond their capabilities.

I clasped a hand on his shoulder and smiled at him.

“Don’t worry, I left no loose ends this time,” was the first thing he said, “though I wish I had more time for clean up, but the cops were called. They’re most probably already there.”

“As long as there’s nothing linking us to them, it’s okay,” I reassured him and pulled us both to the sofa. He shook his head at that.

I trusted Hobi, I knew he was damn good at his job. He was always so excellent at making everything that was causing me headaches disappear, and I felt endless gratitude to the man. For a moment we both just sat there in comfortable silence and sipped our drinks.

I took another swig of whiskey and winced. “Jin would kill me if he saw me right now,” I muttered and Hobi laughed. “It’s for celebration, I’m sure he would understand,” the man joked, knowing full well how obsessed the doctor was with making us all live healthily, even when we all knew it was a losing battle. I snickered again and relaxed into the sofa.

“If the cops are there right now, that means they’ll probably show up here by the evening or early tomorrow,” I mused out loud, already too familiar with their strategies. Hobi agreed with me, but I could see that he was thinking about something else.

“What’s up?” I asked gently. Hobi looked at me and hesitated a little. “I might have to go to Japan for a little bit,” he said eventually. I looked at him in surprise.

“Japan? Why?”

The man reached into his back pocket and pulled out a piece of folded paper. One of the corners was painted with a splatter of blood and the paper was all tired and frayed from whatever it went through.

“He was really trying to make sure I wouldn’t read this, so I made extra sure to get it,” Hobi explained, looking at me observantly and carefully continuing, “And for good reason. I’m sure you yourself recognise this.” He handed me the paper and I slowly unfolded it to not do any more damage to it.

I did recognise it and immediately felt a rush of cold rage hit my bloodstream. Before me, there was a formal invitation to meet with the Watanabe family, one of the smaller suppliers from Japan. They weren’t the ones that we were doing the most business with, but we had a mutual trust to keep out of each other’s way, occasionally help each other out and otherwise not cross each other’s paths.

Whether they knew what these little fucks were planning or not, it seems that a connection between them was established. And as such, I couldn’t let it slide. Especially since the dead rat wanted to keep it secret so bad. There must have been something going on.

For the Watanabes it would be beneficial to try and get us out of the way, since we were blocking their way to most of Seoul, but I couldn’t believe they were this fucking stupid.

“That explains a lot,” I said, reverting back to my business self, “and here I was, thinking we were cordial with each other.” Hobi hummed. I looked at him and let him feel the full force of my anger with the behaviour of our supposed allies.

“Let them know just how disappointed I am with them for me, please,” I told him, voice full of ice. This wasn’t a playground, we weren’t kids messing about in the sandbox. We had to act quickly, before someone got the idea that they could cross our path.

The conversation was a little stunted after that, both of us thinking about the implications of an alliance between these two; so once Hobi finished his drink, he moved to leave, finally deciding it’s time to get back to his boys and make sure everything’s going off without a hitch now. He turned around, mouth opening to tell me one last thing, when he opened the door and promptly bumped into someone. I stood up from the chair, worried for a moment, only to grin wide when I realised who it was.

Hobi had managed to catch the nosy detective before she fell, and I had the best view in the house for when she looked up and realised who was it that she slammed into at my office. As every time, her face was an open book there for everyone to read and I saw it go from apologetic to absolute mortification to some sort of astounded glee. I watched her like a hawk while she stared at Hobi and the wheels in my brain were turning full speed. Huh, could it be?

Even when she snapped out of it and Hobi started to tease her, her eyes remained glued to the man with clarity and determination. If I was a jealous man, I may have even gotten a little angry at the display of open interest, I thought to myself jokingly while I watched them amused. So this was her goal, huh? She was after Hoseok. It did make sense, he would be someone the police found interesting, but he also had considerable experience at dodging them.

Once Hobi left and I could see her gearing up to bullshit me to the max, clearly totally out of her depth here, I decided to test my theory a little bit. But I would need help with that. I gave her a little bait and only waited for her to bite. She did. She didn’t even ask how I knew about what was happening in the docks, just started scrambling to explain herself somehow. I pulled out my phone again and texted the one man I knew could accomplish this.

Me, 16:29: how fast can you get here? need a distractor asap

TaeTae, 16:29: be there in 15 hyung <3

I chuckled a little at his fast reply, but quickly got up to move towards the bar. I had to distract her well and leave her distracted enough to slip a little bug on her. I weaved my web, pulled her in different directions, and I lied.

“We had nothing to do with it,” I said, though I had ordered the strike as retribution. But some things she wasn’t prepared to hear upfront, with some honesty I would have to wait until she was too deep to be appalled by the reality.

Taehyung burst into the room just as he always did, in the perfect way to steal all the attention. Her head snapped to the door with panic, and I seized my opportunity. I moved behind my table and fished around in the first drawer for the small device. I checked on Taehyung who was doing his best magician act, though by definition he would be more of my beautiful young assistant tasked with distracting the crowd while I faked the magic trick. It took only a second for my skilled fingers to slip the tracker beneath her phone case and by the moment she looked at me in horror at Taehyung’s behaviour, I was already sitting on the side of the guest chair satisfied with myself and watching the man work.

I couldn’t help the pleased hum when she grabbed her phone and flustered stumbled out of the door.

The moment the door closed behind her Tae looked at me curiously. “What was that about?” he asked full of mischievous keenness. I shrugged and smiled at him mysteriously. “Just trying to prove a theory of mine,” I uttered nonchalantly and thoroughly enjoyed the eager interest of the younger man.

“That was a tracker, wasn’t it?” he asked again, ever so observant. I gave him another grin. His curious eyes never missed anything, they always flitted around wherever he was, taking in people’s actions and expressions, that’s why he was my favourite spy. People didn’t take him much seriously, they didn’t see him as threat and he knew how to take advantage of it perfectly and bring every little dirty secret right to me.

“Hmmm, we’ll speed up the process a little bit and Kookie will hopefully relax now,” I told him. He hummed too and got up to get himself another drink.

“Guess we’ll see.”

Maybe we were having a little too much fun pretending like we didn’t know she was tailing us. How do you school your face while talking when you know that a cop is sitting 10 metres away from you? Though we did agree that we like the upgraded look with the motorcycle, so I guess that’s what she was up to the whole time we didn’t see her following us.

It would be a little better had Hoseok been in the country, but we had to entertain ourselves while he dealt with the traitors. I hadn’t heard from him really for around two or three days, which surprisingly was a good thing. It meant he was too busy solving problems to reply. In the end Jin decided to go with him and I had absolute confidence that they would deal with it no matter what that entailed.

I heard Jungkook lightly complain that she’d gotten craftier and how he often had to drive around to lose her to be able to go about his day peacefully. She did go after Namjoon for a little bit and then promptly gave up, which didn’t surprise me as he only spent time home or in the office, she did try to follow Jungkook, but he never gave her a chance. Tae and Jimin didn’t seem to be her targets in the slightest, much to Taehyung’s displeasure, who grumbled about how he’s also interesting. So she mostly stuck with me. But I was patiently waiting for Hobi to return and see.

The moment Hoseok and Jin stepped foot into the country, I warned him to not show up around for a while. He was very confused, but when I said it’s related to the police, he obliged happily, though we had to meet up to discuss his trip to Japan and its conclusion. One day when her little red dot didn’t move from the station, I called him over.

I had to go to the Magic Shop, which was one of the newer clubs Tae was trying to transform into a popular spot, and Jimin came over too. He was still trying to “sweeten my rage”, in his words, which I no longer felt but didn’t tell him. I’d never admit it, but I quite liked the way he was trying to be so damn cute and play up how much he loves me, though I was pretty sure he knew and that’s why he hasn’t stopped yet. I was just laughing at the two younger men’s antics when Jungkook’s car pulled over to the club and the two newcomers jumped out.

“Hyung!” Jimin shouted out, “You’re finally back!” Hobi laughed and threw himself at the blond, tackling him into an aggressive hug, both of them giggling. Tae couldn’t stay still and joined them, with me and Jungkook watching them fondly with smiles on our faces.

“Okay, okay!” I talked over the commotion and pulled them apart, “Unfortunately I have to steal him away for a bit, you can have him later.” The youngsters pouted at me, but it was all in jokes. But when I looked over at Hobi, he had a guilty expression on his face. I sighed a little and smiled at him.

“Sorry hyung, I actually have to go check on the warehouses in Songhyeon-dong, the boys have been asking for me,” he explained and gave an apologetic smile, “You can come too, though. If you have time.” I pursed my lips and thought about it, but I already knew I couldn’t make it.

“It’s across the whole city, unfortunately it’s not convenient for me today,” I told him. We needed to debrief properly; it would be best if Jin was present too, but the man was hard to come by during the weekdays due to his clinic. Every rich person in whole of Seoul wanted him to attend to them and he usually ran from patient to patient, while Hobi was the number one contact for those who worked in or around the warehouses and thus found himself driving around Seoul just solving shit that went wrong. If he couldn’t wait here to have a conversation, it must have been pretty serious there. He was looking at me stressed, most probably trying to think of a way to make it work for everyone, but I patted his shoulder and smiled reassuringly.

“It’s okay, Hobi,” I assured him, “I’ll visit you tomorrow or the day after. I’ll bring Jin too.” He returned my smile and moved back to Jungkook’s car.

“Wait, Hobi-hyung!” Jimin shouted out again, “I drove here with the silver Porsche, you can take it cause Tae’s gonna drive me back.” The blond-haired man fished around in the pockets for a moment and then threw something small and black towards Hoseok, who caught it without problem with a cheeky wink and a smile.

He was gone in a minute, and I soon followed with Jungkook. In the end Jimin took my car and I asked Kookie to drive me to the office, since he was going to stay there with me and Joon anyway. I kept thinking back to the Japan issue, wondering what the boys found out and what the Watanabes tried to claim. And whether we should prepare to burn some bridges.

The next day, though, started in a somewhat peculiar manner. When I came out in the morning and got into the car, Jungkook was sitting next to Soobin with a sombre expression. I immediately straightened and prepared to hear whatever it was that went wrong in those few short hours I was gone.

“I messed up hyung,” he said sheepishly and handed over his phone. The little tracking red dot wasn’t in its usual spot, by my house or by one of the clubs, not even by the office or the station. It was in Songhyeon-dong. Right across from our warehouses. I laughed and Jungkook looked at me nervously.

“Where’s Hoseok right now?” I asked immediately and the younger man snapped into attention.

“He’s in there right now, got in about 7 o’clock, was talking about some papers that have been waiting for him to approve,” Kookie answered, mind back on business and unpleasant feelings left behind to focus on this fully. I grinned at the man wildly. “Perfect.”

I swiftly pulled out my phone and started writing a simple and quick message.

Me, 8:15: stay in the warehouse, don’t walk out at all

Hope, 8:17: what do you mean hyung? are we in danger?

Me, 8:17: no, don’t worry. our little spy is on you and i’m trying to prove something

“Do you want to go to Dynamite today, or are we expected at the hotel?” Soobin’s voice pulled me away from my phone, back to a nervous Jungkook sitting next to the unsure bodyguard. “The hotel, thank you Soobin,” I answered politely with a mild smile and redirected my attention back to Jungkook.

“Don’t worry Kookie, I’m not mad,” I said with a smile, “This is actually exactly what I wanted, just hoped that I would have more time and control over when she found him. Guess she must have been on us yesterday.” The young man stiffened and looked back to his phone.

“Do you think she’s aware of the tracker? Left it at the station purposely to mess with us?” he asked all business-like, probably already trying to come up with a new plan. “It’s possible,” I hummed, “It’s time to find out.”

Silence took over the car as we made our way through the city. I smiled to myself. Even though it happened a little faster than I was planning, but I was glad she was still going in the direction I had predicted. I look away for a moment and you leave for one of my friends, huh? You definitely work fast.

I laughed again, earning a strange look from the two younger men, but only gave them a mysterious wink. We might be able to deal with this shortly, if everything goes well. The key was to find out what the goal was, then I could control what she found and make sure she’d stay away from what we needed to hide.

“Let’s give her a few days,” I told them and gave them another grin.

Me, 8:25: how would you feel about going to the warehouse every day and just staying there?

Hope, 8:26: ???

Four days later I sat into my car and instructed Soobin to drive to the warehouse with a shit-eating grin. Jungkook had been keeping me updated on her movements and she spent her days either at the station or staking out in the building across the premises.

Hobi, as promised, had been going to the warehouse and just sitting on his ass there, thoroughly complaining through his phone the whole time. I had been trying to calm him down and keep him there, while Joon and Kookie took it upon themselves to tease him all the time with pics and cheeky texts about eating in restaurants and hanging out in clubs together, so he was slowly losing his patience with my plan. I had to move forward quickly for the benefit of us all, even though I did find it awfully funny.

Reaching our destination, I took the time to walk around very self-assuredly for a moment knowing she was watching this angle. When I tired of putting on a show of how free and relaxed I was this day, I finally made my way inside. Through the door you entered straight to the short hall which led to our office, so it was a relatively short and quiet trip.

Hoseok and Jungkook were already sitting inside, Hobi behind the table and the maknae occupying an armchair sitting a little more towards a corner to the left of the door. With the sound of the door opening, their heads snapped towards me and as soon as they saw my smug smirk, Hoseok groaned loudly.

“God, please tell me this is over!” he whined and dramatically draped himself over the surface of the table, “I can’t take another day of this! I’m going to fucking lose my mind here!” Jungkook chuckled at him and retorted with a slight smirk: “You should have treated this as a holiday or something. Watched Netlix and all that stuff.” To that Hobi screamed out loud and grabbed something on his table to throw at the now laughing Kookie. “Yah! You think I have time to burn? I’ve got shit to do!”

I snickered at them and moved inside, Soobin following me in. I gestured at Jungkook. “Did you bring the cup as I asked?” The man nodded at me. I smiled, as relaxed as I haven’t been in a long time, and sat down on a chair by the table. Soobin remained standing by the door so I gestured at him to also sit somewhere, as this would take a while.

“So what’s next in your amazing and genius plan that involves the literal torture of your beloved dongsaeng?” He asked, suddenly pretending to be all business-like and serious, while Jungkook still occasionally giggled in his spot to our left.

“Now we talk for a bit, draw it out a little,” I said smirking meanly, “Then we send in Soobin and wait what he brings back.”

“It’s pretty cold outside, hope she’s dressed for the occasion,” Hobi noted cheekily and relaxed into his chair. I hummed and schooled my expression. I did have to bring up Japan, we haven’t had a chance to talk about it properly yet and I couldn’t visit him sooner cause we were planning what to do about our little spy.

“I don’t think she knows about the tracker,” Jungkook mused out loud, “she keeps bringing it. I don’t think it’s a statement like ‘look where I am’, it wouldn’t make sense to let us know.” Hobi nodded, humming in agreement, and they carried on for a moment, the conversation heading to the clubs as Hoseok asked about how it went while he was gone. I let them speak for a little while, just enjoying the company, until their chattering died off and they both looked at me questioningly.

“We have to talk about Japan,” I said simply, not feeling the need to beat around the bush. Hoseok immediately sobered up and straightened in his chair, while Jungkook looked on curiously, no doubt also dying to know the situation in which we found ourselves in.

“Well, they claimed innocence,” the dark-haired man said sombrely, “I’ve heard bullshit enough time in my life to smell it a mile away, but there wasn’t anything I could really pin on them. I checked the dates of their stay, and it was relatively recently, there wasn’t much correspondence between them, that I found. And we did thrash the dealers’ hiding spots. They must have gotten rid of it. But the head of the Watanabe family is such a slimy motherfucker that I don’t believe a word he said. They surely must have been planning something together.” He shrugged and sat back. “I’m afraid right now we can’t do much about it unless we want to seem like vicious usurpers.” Jungkook leaned forward and looked at us thoughtfully.

“Japan is outside of our turf, if we did something rash without substantial evidence, we could risk losing the support of the Satos,” he contemplated out loud, “God knows what’s going on between them right now.” I hummed and nodded, smiling at the man satisfied. He really did grow up, god. Time flies so fast.

“There seem to be two main issues right now,” I surmised solemnly, “First, the Watanabes are small and cowardly. The reason why they’re where they are is because they just suck up to others and hug their thighs to drain all the benefits from them. If they stirred up trouble with someone, they would no doubt end up eradicated before sundown.” The men looked at me with similar serious expressions. I took a moment to get myself a glass of water and continued talking standing up by the office desk.

“So, what gave them the confidence to get involved with an effort against us?” I mused thoughtfully, “There is a chance that they couldn’t have known that their new friends would immediately go and cross us and get themselves all killed, but I trust Hobi’s instinct. The fucking clown that leads the family now is a sleazy bastard, one with an ego that doesn’t match his wit nor his guts. He loves to gloat and provoke, but only when he knows someone stronger’s got his back.” Hobi nodded. He knew the man well since he had the displeasure of meeting him a few times when we were in Japan and had to attend a few of the same events as he did.

“If he knew he was at risk, he would have met me already grovelling,” Hoseok muttered with distaste, his immense disdain towards the man showing through, “that’s the kind of a pathetic vermin he is.” I agreed with him and carried on.

“So that means he probably feels comfortable timidly opposing us, cause there’s someone that’s got his back,” I concluded, “Someone who’s probably on our side of the puddle, someone who probably hooked him up with the rats we just got rid of. They probably weren’t expecting them to go against us immediately and die, but they don’t feel intimidated by the fact that we suspect something.”

The room sunk into silence as we all pondered about it. I could be looking too much into it, but in this world one never knew. You couldn’t survive here by assuming everyone’s best intentions. Quite the opposite. The little shits feeling confident enough to swindle us, them trying to desperately hide the invitation before they lose the chance to, the Watanabe’s approach to a meeting with Hobi. It wasn’t much to go off of, but it was suspicious enough to keep track of and keep in mind. If there potentially was a beginning of a plot against us, we had to stay alert and monitor the situation before it spun out of control.

“The confidence means their alliance is already pretty sure, then,” Jungkook broke the silence and took turns looking at us both. I gave him a single jerky nod in return. “Probably. Who knows.”

“What’s the second issue?” Hobi suddenly asked. Kookie looked at me questioningly and his face suddenly looked so much younger with his eyes wide, it almost shocked me speechless.

“The Japanese families,” I shook off my surprise and continued, “If we do decide to make take some precautions, we need to properly communicate so with the Satos and get their support. They need to be in full agreement with whatever we choose to do with the Watanabe clan.” Hobi scoffed and turned to me.

“That shouldn’t be too hard. They’re not that influential and going against us means they’re going against the Satos too.”

“Still,” I repeated, “We need to test their alliance to us too.” A realisation hit Jungkook’s face and he nodded enthusiastically. That made me laugh a little at his earnestness. Hobi also smiled, but it was still strained.

“Let’s bide our time for now,” my voice carried through the office resolutely, “Lay low, pretend we’re over this issue and gather our wits. And prepare for potentially dealing with this.”

We nodded at each other. Even if years have passed since our youth and the fire and passion and determination that comes with it, we were still prepared to fight for what was rightfully ours. We climbed our way here through hell and there’s no way we’d let some snotty little brats try to take everything away from us.

“I’ll keep my eyes and ears out,” Kookie stated, phone in hand ready, “They’re bound to come across something juicy.” Hobi murmured his approval and turned his attention back to me.

“Today we should deal with the other issue at hand, or I am actually going to go insane between these four walls,” he complained whinily and I laughed at him. I moved towards the little kitchenette in the right corner from the door and started preparing some coffee. I made a cup for all present and then one extra into the cup Kookie brought with him, which I promptly handed to Soobin.

“My boys scoped it out and she seems to have her hideout on the sixth floor to the left of the staircase,” Hobi instructed the young man, who patiently waited on me to send him off.

“Tell her something that will piss her off,” I said only, grinning wildly. The blond man smirked at me and disappeared out of the room swiftly and silently.

“Now we wait,” I told the room, sitting gingerly back into the chair with my fresh cup of coffee, playing with the spoon like a spoiled little kid waiting for his birthday present. We all stayed silent, too much on our minds to keep mindless convo. Kookie was typing furiously on his phone, a slight scowl sometimes tugging at his features, while Hobi relaxed into the chair and serenely looked off into the distance. I tried to keep the self-satisfied smirk on my face while my mind slipped to more serious issues.

I couldn’t help but be worried about the current situation. Their potential ties to a stronger gang, or maybe even a family, would explain the surprising difficulty with which they went down. I knew I stepped on many toes when I stole half the fucking Seoul right from under their noses, and even more when I proved impossible to dethrone. It didn’t surprise me at all to uncover a supposed scheme like this. Truly, this didn’t even have to necessarily be aimed against me and my gang, but the boys fucked up by involving us in their business. But no matter what, we would emerge victorious from this, that I had no doubt about. Once someone crossed a line, we would make an example of them and teach a lesson to whoever it was that wanted to mess with us.

Over the years in this “business”, I had learnt a lot. One of the things was: what couldn’t be solved with threats, would be solved with blood. And it never failed me before. I looked at Hobi and Kookie again and smiled. We had each other’s backs and I trusted their abilities more than I trusted myself. The truth was that we were more a family than many around us that were actually blood related. That was the second reason of our success.

Soobin returned within 15 minutes, of which he probably spent most time going up and down the stairs. He walked back into the office slightly breathless and a little red, so I gestured for the single cup of coffee left on the mini kitchen counter. He walked over and took a tentative sip, probably finding it the perfect temperature since it’s been waiting for him here and slowly cooling down.

We all found ourselves hanging onto him with our eyes, some excitement coursing through the room at what he was about to divulge to us. Kookie broke first.

“How did she react to you?” he asked eagerly, waiting to confirm his theory about the tracker.

“She was shocked and surprised, and frankly pissed off,” Soobin answered immediately, his deep voice having a calming effect on us, “She didn’t seem to understand how you were able to find her.”

Jungkook exclaimed happily. “Perfect, that means she doesn’t know about the tracker,” he said satisfied. I was about to destroy his whole joy though, so I let him bask in it a little before speaking.

“We’re gonna mess with her a little, make it obvious,” I told the room and Kookie immediately groaned. “Hyung, having her tracked without her knowledge is the safest way to let her be but still have control over the situation. Why would you want to give that up?” I winked at him and pursed my lips teasingly.

“To provoke her. Rile her up, frustrate her, push her to her limits,” I explained, eyes flitting between the three men, “She’ll reveal herself then.” Kookie hummed in understanding, but Hobi squinted his eyes at me somewhat suspicious. I quickly averted his eyes and focused back onto Soobin.

“What else did she say?” I asked him. The man immediately snapped to attention at me addressing him and answered. “That you’re annoying and she hates you.” His voice was neutral, but I could detect some undertones of amusement. I agreed it must have been an amusing sight.

I laughed lightly and finished my coffee in one gulp. The game was on.

Now that Hoseok was free of his prison, he went back to flitting between the docks and ships like a mother bird trying to take care of all of her young. Jin was similarly busy by his practice, so he also missed out on all of the fun. Namjoon kept saying he was above messing with the police, even though I caught him sneaking smirks and grins every now and then, and Kookie was just as disapproving as ever of my tactics. Jimin tried to stay neutral as he hadn’t met her yet, but thoroughly enjoyed our shenanigans.

That left me and Tae on the shit-stirrer team, and we did milk it for as long as we could. Just the ultimate annoyances, hoping to send her into a complete rage over this. She still had the tracker regularly on her, so we were forced to assume she was none the wiser, but the longer it dragged on the more suspicious I was becoming.

Once she started showing up to the office regularly, cheshire grin firmly plastered on her face, tracker still firmly attached to her, I pretty much guessed she must have known. Suddenly I was spending my afternoons making her tea and watching her leisurely stroll about my office, studying every inch of it and grinning from ear to ear. I waited patiently for her next move, and admittedly, I found myself quite excited with this game we were playing with each other. She was a fast learner and had a quick wit, and I did appreciate her readiness to throw all laws aside to try to stick it to a guy that mildly annoyed her once. The anticipation was steadily rising the longer we just danced around and pretended we both knew nothing.

I did start to slip. I watched her move about less, focused more on work. I would always suddenly shake myself out of the work-induced haze to find her still sitting at the sofa curiously eying everything in the office like a little kid first time in an amusement park. But while we were in this strange stale-mate, I didn’t dare refuse her visits. I was truly curious, dying to know her next move, especially since she suddenly became such a showman.

I didn’t immediately realise what was happening when she suddenly stopped showing up. One day she was sitting there, smirking up a storm, and the next there was no trace of her. I found myself walking around my office, inspecting the objects at display and the decorations, trying to catch anything different. I even allowed Jungkook to thoroughly comb through the room to make sure there weren’t any planted bugs or things in the same vein, but the space was clean.

We kept checking on the tracker app, but it became quite obvious immediately she had gotten rid of it, as it was moving in areas that she never went to. So she did know. And she did do something.

It wasn’t until two days later, when Jungkook stormed my house and decided to comb through my clothes with a device detector; and found a corner of my coat beeping curiously. I had to stop him from tearing into it in his haste to find out what she planted on me, and instead took it upon myself to inspect the piece of clothing. I managed to find a small tear and smirked at her craftsmanship. I fished the little gadget out and handed it over to the younger man.

Jin and Hobi were sitting on the couch watching this whole ordeal go down with curious, slightly amused and mildly alarmed faces, but I wasn’t too worried about it. Jungkook was grumbling something next to me, but I paid him no mind. My fingers felt something else slipped into the coat and I was trying to get a hold of it. By its thinness and elusiveness, it must have been a piece of paper.

“It’s a tracker, similar to what we planted on her,” I heard him explaining it to the other men present, but suddenly exclaimed in victory, startling the three men, as I finally managed to pull the mysterious note out. I took a single look at it and burst out laughing.

They snapped their eyes to me and Jungkook immediately rushed to my side as if prepared to defend my life against a piece of paper. I lifted my gaze to look at their confused faces and flipped the paper around for them to see.

fuck you min yoongi :p

Only Hobi seemed to be as amused by it as I was, Jungkook deliberating something silently and Jin watching us all like a hawk, his sharp eyes taking in the interaction with burning interest.

Once I had calmed down and sent Kookie off to the office to get Joon and figure out what to do about the little device, I found myself sitting between the two other oldest of the group, amusement slowly slipping into nervosity. I knew them well enough, I could see the cogs turning in their heads, I could feel they were on the doorstep of a discovery, and I wouldn’t like the conversation that would follow, but I truly didn’t expect Jin to just jump into it head first.

I had leaned towards the table to grab one of the snacks Jin had graciously prepared for us, when he cleared his throat.

“Kookie had been talking to me a lot about how this whole situation is unfolding. Hobi too,” Jin said, seemingly just holding mindless conversation, but I still tensed up. I turned to look at him.

“Yeah?” I turned to the other side to look at Hobi, who avoided my eyes.

“Yeah,” Jin reiterated, his voice gravelly, “So can you fucking explain to me why have you been testing this cop like you did the boys before they joined?”

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Taglist (open) : @wobblewobble822 @viankiss @jjkwifestyle

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hongcherry · 1 year

Text

Stolen Kisses || khj

"Balancing work and his personal life wasn't easy, but Hongjoong made do by stealing kisses from you when he could."

💋 Pairing: boyfriend!idol!Hongjoong x Reader (cis f)

💋 Rating/Genres/AUs: NC-17; 100% fluff; Idol au, established relationship

💋 Warnings: They shower together but nothing sexual occurs, reader is referred to as girlfriend/girl, lots of kithes hehe, reader is a foreigner, usage of pet names (baby), a cringy nickname for Hongjoong lol (let me know if there's anything else!)

💋 Word Count: 4.6k

💋 Author's Note: I've had this sitting in my WIPs for months since July but I always got distracted while editing it. However, I finally sat down and looked it over thanks Syd if you see this lol. This is my first of many Hongjoong fics, which I'm excited about! This live got me feeling warm and bubbly, so I hope you all enjoy the fluff with me (:

Key: English | Korean

ateez masterlist | main masterlist

A heavy sigh left your lips as you strolled through the narrow hotel corridor. It had been a long week dealing with picky clients—each wanting things created to the “T” according to their visions. Some just didn’t understand that no, you couldn’t put white text on a pastel pink background as it would be difficult to read with the lack of contrast.

You shook your head, hoping to rid the memory of the clients from your brain. At least for now. You just wanted to snuggle against your boyfriend until the responsibility of both your schedules forced you apart. You had flown out after work one day to visit Hongjoong while he was on tour. While Hongjoong had his own schedule to attend to today, you decided to explore the city.

As you approached the room you shared with Hongjoong, you could hear a faint voice inside. You recalled he had texted you earlier to let you know he had planned to do a livestream with his fans tonight. They were usually scheduled beforehand so you didn’t accidentally interrupt him or any of the other members. That must be what he’s doing now, you thought to yourself.

You kept that in mind as you carefully unlocked the door and pushed it open. You tried not to make a sound, so it wasn’t heard in the stream.

Hongjoong and you were lucky to have your own room, but the fans may get suspicious if they heard the door opening if he were to be alone. Sure, they may think it’s one of the members or staff, but you knew Hongjoong didn’t want to risk it. Understandably so because you felt the same.

The streams were normally conducted with a staff member in the room so they could monitor the member(s). Despite this, they made an exception tonight and monitored the stream in another room. If anything were to arise, they would contact Hongjoong via text.

It’s no surprise your relationship with the famous idol was a secret. You didn’t want to bring any drama to his career. You both figured if you were still together in the future–hopefully, you would be–then you may consider disclosing your relationship to the public. Though, that wasn’t going to happen anytime soon.

Hongjoong quickly glanced up mid-sentence when he heard the soft click of the door opening. From where the entrance was located, you couldn’t see each other. You made sure the door was locked before peeping your head around the corner to show yourself. You gave him a little wave in greeting as you took off your shoes.

When Hongjoong saw you, his lips instantly curled in a small smile. However, the smile was quickly directed to the camera to act like the grin was for his fans—not his girlfriend.

“Yeah, it’s spicy,” Hongjoong said to the phone that was propped up as he sat back against his chair. He set his chopsticks to the side of his empty noodle bowl.

You soundlessly made your way further into the room and set down your purse before making your way to the closet.

“Yeah, definitely spicy,” Hongjoong continued. He quickly licked the corner of his lips to rid any remnants of the spicy noodles he had just consumed. His eyes stole a glance upward to see you starting to remove your clothes.

He’s seen your body multiple times throughout your two-year-long relationship. Seeing you change was normal for him now, yet, he could still feel his body tingle at the sight of your figure. Perhaps it was because he loved your body, but another part of him was just so enamored with the reminder that you were his. That this domestic life with you was something he could really have, even with his hectic schedule.

“I need some water. Just a moment,” Hongjoong quickly told his fans and left the chair.

You were finishing changing into more comfortable clothes when you felt warm hands grab your hips.

You snapped your head up in surprise to see Hongjoong behind you.

“Hi, baby,” he whispered in your ear before pressing a soft kiss against your temple, trying to keep the sound inaudible to the stream. “I’ll be done soon, okay?”

“It’s fine,” you reassured and turned in his grasp. You placed a gentle hand against his cheek as you pecked his lips, wishing you could indulge in his affection longer, but you knew his fans were waiting for him to return.

Reluctantly, he let you go and went to the mini fridge in the room. He retrieved drinks for both of you and handed you one.

“Thanks,” you murmured and grabbed it. After giving you one last kiss, he went back to his chair.

It wasn’t the first time you had been in the same room as him while he did a live stream. Although you had to stay silent during them, you got used to them over time and ended up doing your own activities.

You quietly broke the seal of the water bottle, sat on the bed, and took a sip. Your eyes wandered to your boyfriend in the corner of the room.

His two-toned hair was slicked back to expose his forehead. Some pieces fell into his eyes, but the look just made him more attractive. He donned a plaid button-down shirt that appeared a little too big, but you knew he didn’t mind the oversized fit. Hongjoong has always been handsome, but today he just shone more than usual. You could probably sit there and admire him until the sun rose.

“Ah, I brought soda, but I don’t think I can drink this right now,” Hongjoong said after a while of reading the comments. “One moment.”

Hongjoong took the chance to be near you again.

“Was that an excuse?” you giggled softly and peered up at him when he neared the bed.

He smiled and shook his head, leaning down to give you yet another kiss. He didn’t care if he was being excessive with the kisses. He missed you too much to care. Plus, he would be unable to feel your lips due to his schedule, so he was being greedy while he could.

“No,” he said after the short kiss. “But I might as well steal a few kisses while I can, right?”

As if to be true to his word, he gave you another one.

You laughed quietly and grabbed his hand, shaking it gently to show your own affection. You would have done more, but you didn’t have time.

Hongjoong understood and grabbed a juice from the fridge before going back to his chair. And no, he didn’t forget to give you a kiss, but this time on the top of your head.

You sat for a few more minutes watching him interact with his fans. A small smile formed on your lips involuntarily. You couldn’t help the way your heart swelled at how he composed himself.

“I’ll work hard to prepare with confidence,” Hongjoong continued his talk.

Despite wanting to watch him, you tore your gaze from him and pulled out the book you brought with you. Though, it was hard to focus. You stared at the words on the pages, yet you weren’t really reading. Your attention kept drifting off to the man in the corner of the room. His calming voice lured your attention to him.

Hongjoong was the third member you met of ATEEZ.

You were hired to contract for the company three years ago to help with graphics for their promotions. You ran into Yunho and Wooyoung on your first day. Ironically, you had met them down the block from the company building but didn’t recognize them at the time. It was your first time going to the building and being a foreigner, so you had a little trouble with directions. You had enough knowledge of Korean to live by, but some words or phrases still had you puzzled. Nevertheless, you found the building with their help.

Two weeks later and you met Hongjoong during a briefing meeting. You didn’t see him after a while and every meeting was nothing spectacular. What made the difference was that you and Hongjoong often got to the meetings early and made small talk. He didn’t mind which language you decided to speak, as long as you were comfortable. He even encouraged you to speak English since it helped him learn and retain it better. Likewise, it helped when he spoke Korean to you constantly. You were learning from each other, and it was a lot more beneficial than learning from a textbook.

You both tried to keep things professional despite the growing feelings toward one another. For some time you sat at opposite ends of the table to increase the distance—hoping the farther away you were, the more your feelings would disappear. However, it was to no avail. Like two teenagers in love, you both snuck off after meetings to exchange forbidden kisses in abandoned rooms.

You and Hongjoong knew your contract with KQ was coming to an end after the promotions, so you made a deal that you wouldn’t continue whatever you two had any further until your contract ended. Although there wasn’t a dating ban, you still wanted to remain professional. You were always told it wasn’t good to be in a relationship with a coworker—conflict of interests and such.

Once the contract was finished, Hongjoong asked you for a proper date.

It was easy to fall for Kim Hongjoong. He was hardworking, thoughtful, open-minded, and of course beyond attractive. You always felt happier around him and the feeling intensified when he became yours.

“‘Will you go watch the Minions 2’?” Hongjoong read aloud the comment. He gave a small smile. “I’ll try.”

A few more seconds passed as he read the comments.

“Yep! So… ‘Go to sleep!’ Noo!” Hongjoong paused with a chuckle but then relented. “Okay.”

You glanced up from your book at the sound, catching a glimpse of a smile on his lips. Your body was growing tired as the minutes passed, but you forced yourself to stay awake. You wanted to spend some time with Hongjoong before you went to sleep.

“I have to wash my face and body and hair and all that,” he continued and gestured to the parts he was listing.

You smiled hearing him speak in English. Even though he wasn’t able to study lately, he still tried to have conversations with you in English to remember the words he did know. You knew he wanted to work diligently in any way he could.

“I’ll get going now,” Hongjoong began to sign off, a hand waving to the camera. “Have a good day, and have a good night. Bye bye! Bye!”

Hongjoong fiddled with the phone for a second before quickly repeating a bye and turning off the live.

He waited a moment to be sure the live ended then got up and walked toward you.

“Sorry,” he said as he sat next to you on the bed. He wrapped his arms around your body and hauled you into his lap.

“Don’t apologize, Joongie,” you replied and snaked your arms around his shoulders. You nestled your head in the crook of his neck. His body was warm and he still smelled faintly of his cologne. “You need to talk to Atiny. They love seeing you.”

Although you did want more time with him, you knew it was important for him to build that connection with his fans. He wanted to talk to them, too, just felt bad that he couldn’t do both—talk to them and hang out with you. There weren’t enough hours in the day.

“But I love seeing you too,” Hongjoong whined softly and squeezed your body tighter.

You giggled and nodded, showing that you loved seeing him in return.

“You look really handsome today,” you complimented and pulled away to look at him.

He grinned, teeth on display while his eyes stared at you fondly.

“Thank you, baby,” he said and leaned forward. You met him halfway.

You smiled into the kiss, your heart still fluttering after years of constant smooches. You weren’t sure if you would ever get over the way he made you feel.

Hongjoong massaged your sides as he deepened the kiss. His tongue found yours and you giggled lightly when you tasted the lingering spice from his noodles. At the sound, he squeezed your sides playfully. Your hands trailed up to his hair; your fingers tangled in his locks. Although they weren’t as soft as usual due to the hairspray, you still liked the way it felt between your fingers.

When you were both out of breath, you pulled away. His eyes were shining under the lights.

Carefully, you leaned over to the nightstand and grabbed the makeup remover wipes. You freed one from the package and slowly began to wipe the makeup off Hongjoong’s face.

Hongjoong’s lips twisted up in a small smile at the action. His eyes fluttered closed while he continued to trace random patterns on your sides.

None of you spoke a word, but that didn’t matter. You just wanted to feel him against you. To be in his presence.

After you wiped away his eye makeup, he opened his eyes and slid his hands to your back.

Hongjoong lazily rubbed your lower back as he watched you. He started to hum a random tune while he did so. Your head was tilted as you concentrated on not being too rough on his skin.

“Come join me in the shower,” he spoke as you finished removing the last of the makeup.

You tossed the wipe in the trash and put the package back on the nightstand.

“But I’m too tired for sexy time,” you confessed with a small whine, already feeling your eyes getting heavy.

Hongjoong smiled at you chastely. “We don’t need to have sexy time. I just wanna spend more time with you.”

Your eyes squinted while you hummed in disbelief.

“Come on, pretty girl,” he begged, lower lip sticking out in a childish pout. “Please?”

Your eyes remained on his face for a moment. His eyes were round as he silently pleaded for you to agree. “You’re lucky you’re so cute,” you caved in.

Hongjoong grinned and patted your butt to indicate to move. You followed his silent order and climbed off his lap.

Hongjoong started to unbutton his shirt, revealing more of his honey skin a button at a time.

“You’re staring,” he teased when he noticed your eyes glued to the way his fingers worked to unfasten the fabric.

“Yes I am,” you boldly replied and flickered your gaze to his.

Hongjoong’s eyes widened slightly, and he ducked his head when he felt his cheeks redden. You supposed he wasn’t expecting that response.

You laughed and raised his chin to see his face. “You’re cute when you’re shy.”

“I’m not cute or shy,” he huffed and finished undoing his shirt. He stood in front of you, blue jeans on and shirt hanging open to show his defined torso. If he weren’t being pouty, you would’ve found him sexy in his fit. You just thought he was more adorable right now.

You placed your hands on his chest, and he shivered at your cool touch.

“Yes you are, and I love you because of it,” you said and pressed your lips against his pouty ones.

During the kiss, you pushed his shirt off his shoulders. You helped him pull his arms out, clothed chest pressed against his.

Hongjoong’s hands trailed up your hips to your waist. He grabbed the hem of your shirt and gently peeled it from your body. Because you had dressed comfortably, you had opted out of wearing your bra.

“You’re cold,” he said when he felt your chilled body against his warm one. “Let’s get you under warm water,” he instructed.

Hongjoong quickly removed his pants and took off his watch so he was only in his underwear. He grabbed your hand and led you to the bathroom.

After adjusting the temperature, he pulled off his remaining clothing. You followed suit and wrapped your arms around your body—the cool room causing goosebumps to form quickly.

Hongjoong stepped inside first to ensure the temperature was fine then held out a hand for you. You put your hand in his without hesitation.

A sigh left your lips when the hot water hit your body.

Hongjoong held you close to his figure to help warm you faster. You rested your head against his chest, letting the water fall over both your forms for a while.

“Better?” Hongjoong asked while he rubbed your back.

You nodded.

“Good,” he said and reached for the shampoo. “How was your day?”

You turned around when Hongjoong gestured for you and closed your eyes when you felt him put the liquid on your hair. He began to gently massage your scalp.

“Just some more annoying clients. They wanted a dark… Uh,” you paused when the word in Korean escaped you. You’ve heard it, even used it before, but for some reason, you couldn’t remember at the moment. Hongjoong paused in his movements to give you more of his attention.

“Gradient,” you said, glancing at your boyfriend over your shoulder.

His eyebrows scrunched in confusion as he tried to understand you. He didn’t know that word in English.

“When the color fades from one color to another,” you tried to explain. You could see the imaginary cogs turning in his head, trying to guess the word you were attempting to describe.

“Ahh!” he exclaimed when he recalled the word. “Gradient.”

Of course.

“Gradient,” you repeated sheepishly, though Hongjoong didn’t mind that you had forgotten. He gave you a reassuring smile and grabbed the shower hose. He rinsed your hair, careful to ensure no soap got on your face.

You closed your eyes again and continued, “They wanted a dark gradient with similar shade text. I tried to explain that it wouldn't look as nice but they insisted.”

Hongjoong listened carefully as he washed his own hair quickly. You felt bad that he helped you without you asking, so you stopped his movements and replaced his hands with yours.

“Maybe they’ll change their mind when they see it in its final version,” Hongjoong tried to comfort.

“I hope so,” you replied. You helped him rinse his hair then you each put in your own conditioner. “If they don’t, I don’t want to put my name on the work.”

Hongjoong was used to you switching between languages. Although it took him a little longer to understand what you had said, he never complained as it always helped him with his own English.

“It’ll just show how you’re able to adapt to others' requests,” he assured and reached for the soap bar. You let him glide the soap across your body, enjoying the feel of it and his fingertips against you.

Hongjoong hadn’t been a fan of skin ship initially. During the first few kisses you had, his touches were light. You could barely feel him on your clothed waist. Even his kisses were gentle to the point you felt you were simply brushing lips rather than actually kissing. He gradually became accustomed to your touches, but he still limited a few of them because he wasn’t used to such affectionate actions. Although he did receive love from his members—whether voluntarily or not—it felt different when the touches were from you.

Eventually, he was used to feeling your skin against his. Even started craving it so much that it was hard to even go to the bathroom without him clinging onto you like a koala. It was rather cute. Now, he only gets that way if he hasn’t seen you in a long time. Though, you are never upset with it. You like needy Hongjoong.

“That’s nice of you to say,” you replied and grabbed the bar.

“You’re talented, baby,” Hongjoong said.

“Thank you,” you murmured.

Hongjoong let out a small sigh at the feel of the soap rubbing against his skin. His head lolled back, and you took the time to admire his fit figure. His muscles were not as defined as some of his members, but they were still easily visible. Although you didn’t care either way, you had to admit it was a nice plus.

“You don’t need to thank me,” Hongjoong answered softly after a few seconds. He tilted his head downward in time to see you rinsing the bar, a habit of yours, before setting it down.

He stepped under the water and let the soap run off his body.

“I have a lot to thank you for,” you said.

Hongjoong grabbed your hips and swung you around to be under the water. You laughed and wiped the water from your face, but it was useless as more water kept coming.

“Like what?” he whispered and captured your lips with his before you could answer. Water raced down both your faces, but neither of you minded. You wrapped your arms around his neck, and he smiled into the kiss at the feel of your body flush against his.

You pulled away and adjusted your bodies so he was more under the water. You reached up to tilt his head back as you rinsed the conditioner from his hair. He closed his eyes and kept his hands on your waist.

“Like how thankful I am to be able to be the only one who gets to kiss you,” you answered belatedly.

“Or how thankful I am to have a boyfriend as amazing as you,” you paused when you noticed Hongjoong’s lips twitching upward. It was as if he was trying hard not to smile. Wanting to see his full grin, you continued.

“Thank you for being so good to me… For making my heart do all sorts of cartwheels.”

“Cartwheels?” he asked and opened his eyes as he moved from the water. He stared down at you confused, not understanding what you meant.

“Cartwheels,” you explained. His mouth opened slightly in a silent “ah” as he understood, nodding slowly. However, his expression quickly turned bashful as he averted his eyes briefly. The words had finally sunk in and he felt his heart thud faster.

“Y-you still don’t need to thank me,” he mumbled and returned the favor of helping you rinse your hair.

“Maybe not,” you said even though you truly believed you did. Hongjoong was such a blessing in your life; you couldn’t imagine being with anyone else. “But I want to.”

Hongjoong bit his lip at your words. He could run in circles with you about this all night long. Instead, he shut the water off and went to grab a towel for you.

He enclosed the towel around your body before he quickly dried off his chest and hair with his own towel. He wrapped the material around his waist and secured it. As he did so, you dried off and fixed your towel around your body.

You both did your night-time routine hastily then climbed into bed together.

“I hope you have a better day at work tomorrow,” Hongjoong said once you were both settled under the covers. You were facing each other, legs tangled under the sheets. Hongjoong had a hand placed on your side, rubbing his thumb against your warm skin absentmindedly. He spoke slower than usual as he focused on using the correct words in the correct order; yet, you were patient as always. Switching languages wasn’t easy and you admired that he still tried to use your native language even if he wasn’t totally confident in speaking it.

“Me too,” you replied with a smile.

“So, I have a question,” he said. You hummed to show your curiosity.

“Will you go watch the Minions 2 with me?”

You giggled. “Of course, my Minioong.”

Hongjoong sighed at the nickname, acting as if he disliked the pet name you had given him when you first learned about his love for Minions. Though, deep down you knew he liked it. Even if it was cringy and sounded a little funky, it came from you.

“I’m not going to share my popcorn with you now,” he huffed. Playfully, you stuck out a tongue at him. This earned a teasing poke from your boyfriend to which you whined in response.

“My silly girl,” Hongjoong said fondly and moved his hand back to your waist.

The softness of the mattress and the comforting feel of his hand on your bare skin had your eyes drooping. You blinked rapidly when you caught yourself dozing off.

Hongjoong chuckled softly at you trying to fight off the sleep. He pulled your body against him so your head was tucked in his chest. He rubbed your back and closed his eyes, basking in the feel of you engulfed in his embrace.

“Get some sleep. I’ll see you in the morning,” he said and pressed a soothing kiss against your head.

“Are we still going to breakfast?” you wondered quietly, still not wanting to rest just yet.

Hongjoong hummed in affirmation. “You still okay with the members joining us?”

“As long as I get to sit next to you, yes,” you teased as you recalled the time Wooyoung rushed to occupy the only seat by Hongjoong. It forced you to sit away from him, which isn’t a big deal in the grand scheme of things. However, your time with your boyfriend in person was limited, and you just wanted to cling to him until you couldn’t anymore.

“I’ll make sure of it. You’re not leaving my side tomorrow,” he replied with a smile.

“Only tomorrow?” you asked softly and peered up at him.

Hongjoong caught your gaze, carefully raising your face more so he could plant a chaste kiss on your lips. “Forever, baby.”

“I don’t want to leave tomorrow,” you confessed glumly. Your trip to see Hongjoong was ending soon. Once their concert ended tomorrow, he was taking you straight to the airport so you could catch your flight. Despite being sad you weren’t able to spend your last few hours with him directly, you were still happy to see him on stage—doing what he loved for the people he loved. He was meant to be a performer, and you loved seeing his passion shine brightly under the stage lights.

“I don’t want you to either,” he sighed, tugging you against his body and resting his head against yours. “’m going to miss you too much.”

There was silence as your mind ran, sprinting from one sad thought to another. You wanted to stay with Hongjoong longer.

“Don’t be sad, pretty girl,” Hongjoong mumbled. “It’ll be okay.”

“I love you, Joongie,” you replied softly, eyes closing as you let Hongjoong hold you. He squeezed you tenderly before lifting one of your hands to plant a lazy kiss.

“I love you more,” he answered.

Knowing Hongjoong was too tired to argue with you, as he usually did when you said this, you answered, “I love you more.”

“Just this once,” he said with an airy chuckle. “Now, go to sleep, baby.”

“’kay,” you mumbled softly and closed your eyes, a triumphant smile on your face. You felt him adjust a little before settling down. He kept you close as you drifted off to sleep. Instead of dreading tomorrow, you focused on being with Hongjoong now.

It was difficult to be in a relationship with an idol. You knew it would be from the moment you fell for one, but actually living through it pained you more than you realized. However, feeling Hongjoong’s warm body flushed against yours—hearing his heart beat steadily as sleep slowly consumed him—made you remember why you risked it all. Why you overcame the lonely nights, the three-in-the-morning facetimes, and the virtual dates.

He was worth it all.

A/N: For my "shy/silent" readers, I've created a feedback form where you can share your thoughts on my fics in a more anonymous and private way. ^-^

©️hongcherry // DO NOT REPOST OR MODIFY. Please consider reblogging if you liked this work to show your support. Feedback/commentary is always welcomed.

#ateez fluff #hongjoong fluff #ateez idol au #hongjoong x you #hongjoong x reader #hongjoong idol au #atz fluff #hongjoong #ateezlovenet #kdiarynet #ateez fic #atz fic #ateez fanfic #atz fanfic #hongjoong fanfic #hongjoong fic #mimikookie writes

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citrusrei · 11 months

Text

In Every Lifetime.

Joel Miller x Reader MDNI 18+ Summary You fell for a man before the world went to hell. Nearly 20 years later, he’s there again in a different lifetime. Genre: a lil angst if you look at it right, Smut, fluff TLOU!Universe Word Count: 10.7k Warnings: Post-Outbreak!Joel, aggressive situations, a couple of hasslers, smut (piv ~unprotected~, fingering, hand jobs, creampies (again), slight breeding kink maybe? vocal dirty joel, mutual masturbation), age gap (14 years, joel is older duhh) lots of good Ol’ soft Joel, slightly possessive joel (again cause i love him), insecure joel :( happy ending cause my heart couldn’t take a sad one *please imagine whichever Joel you’d like whether it’s pedro’s or videogame joel cause I pictured both at certain points.*

AN: This is truly one of my fav things I’ve ever written lol Joel is so babygirl in it i’m crine. also this can be read as a one shot if u haven’t read the first one~ (but read the first one hehe)

pt. 1

listen to these as you read~

Life after the apocalypse was nothing anyone could have anticipated. Before the outbreak, you’d seen countless movies about zombies or the undead, or infected. But this was different. It wasn’t a virus, or a bio-weapon used to control the population. A fungus. A fungus that just so happened to mutate and create this global panic.

The night it happened you were with a friend of yours testing out a new club downtown. Everything was great. The drinks were cheap and tasty, the music was amazing, the vibe was just immaculate. You and your friend Holly danced, drank, and sang the night away. A little before 11:00pm is when things got strange. The music changed, slower now. Holly asked if you wanted another drink to which you declined, but followed her to the bar anyways.

“Another sex on the beach please!” she urged.

“You’re addicted to those, ya know?” You laughed, shaking your head.

She laughed with you, “I am not! They’re just so delicious I can’t help myself.”

As the bartender handed Holly her drink, you sent Joel a quick text asking him how his birthday was. You’d been taking things slow since the night you and him finally hooked up. He had admitted his feelings for you and you were right there with him. The both of you decided to give each other a shot. You had wanted to see him today but he had told you he was working a double and wouldn’t be home until late so you had planned something with him later in the week.

- 10:45pm Joel <3: Got home a couple hours ago. Sarah wanted to watch a movie and knocked out. Lil girl can’t run with the big dogs.

- 10:45pm Me: lol hopefully she got to see at least a bit of it! Holly dragged me to this club tonight and I’m kind of over it. Would rather be in bed with you rn 😉

- 10:46pm Joel <3: You got no idea how much I'd like that bout now darlin. You got me all weekend.

- 10:46pm Me: You better promise me that, Joel Miller!

- 10:46pm Joel <3: Promise.

- 10:49pm Joel <3: Tommy just called me. He’s in the county jail. I gotta go get him... text you in a bit.

- 10:51pm Me: You’re kidding...... jesus Tommy. But ok. Text me once you get him. Talk soon <3

You slid your phone into your bra and sighed, not surprised that Tommy found himself in a predicament like that. He was so headstrong and stubborn. You wondered what had happened to him.

“Everything okay?” Holly asked. You nodded but still you were unsure. Your eyes floated to a couple on the dance floor as your eyebrows knitted together. The woman began to twitch, her limbs snapping in different, odd directions. It continued a moment. People around her began to notice and step away, creating a circle around her. The man she was with held on to her as an attempt to keep her steady. She fell to the ground, her body still moving slightly. As this happened, the man pulled his cellphone out, most likely trying to call 911. In the blink of an eye, she rose to her feet, jumping on to the man in front of her and sinking her teeth into his neck. It physically startled you as you latched onto Holly’s arm. “We need to leave.” You said, eyes never leaving the woman, the crowd now starting to panic. People dispersed in a matter of moments. You could see someone trying to pry the woman off the man who laid what looked to be lifeless on the ground. That person suffered the same fate. She was on him in an instant.

Holly looked around and realized what was going on before pushing you towards the door. Once outside, everyone was scrambling. And not just people from the club but the man across the street, locking his bail bond business up or people fleeing from a nearby diner a few doors down. It was mania. Your heart was pounding in your chest as you looked around a moment, not exactly sure where to go or what to do.

C’mon, ___! We gotta get to my car!” You followed Holly down the street to where she had her car parked when suddenly a horde of people ran by, being chased by what seemed to be someone covered in blood. Mucous and viscera gargled from his mouth as the sounds echoed through the street. The man dove to an older woman in front of him and began his attack. Holly screamed at the event which cause the man to turn his attention to her. He swung his arm out for her, grabbing her wrist and pulling her forward. You leapt into action, grabbing her body and pulling her back to you with such force, you could feel her back pop.

“Come on, run!” You screamed. The two of you sprinted to her car, not even minding the fact that both your heels had broken off in the process. She started the ignition and sped off, driving anywhere besides here.

“What the fuck is happening?!” She yelled, checking her rearview mirror to make sure no one was following.

“I’m not sure. I need to call Joel.” You pulled your phone out and dialed his number, but it went straight to voicemail. “Fuck!” You called a few more people, Tommy, your mom, your sister. No one answered.

“I gotta get home, ___. My-My son... I left him with the babysitter.” Holly cried, tears flowing now as she thought of all the possibilities of what could be happening to her child.

“Okay- It’s okay. We’ll go get him.”

You and Holly sped to her home, not minding the speed limit as literally no one was. You both got to her house without a hitch, thankfully. However, upon arriving you noticed the door was wide open. Holly’s eyes widened.

“Stay here. I’m going to go in.” She breathed, shaking so bad she could barely unbuckle her seatbelt.

You nodded, checking your phone again and seeing you had a missed call from Tommy. You called him back immediately. It rang once, “Tommy! Hello? Can you hear me?”

“___! I can hear you but barely.” He was staticky. The call was barely hanging on. “Where are you? Are you safe?”

Tears began to prick your eyes as he spoke, his voice comforting you. “Yeah, I’m okay. I’m with Holly. We’re getting her son. What is happening? Are you with Joel? Is Sarah okay?”

Tommy sighed, “I’m not sure. It’s a mad house. Av-oid downtown bu-t drive west. We’re over that w-ay. I was with Joel and Sarah b-ut I got sep-arate-d. Meet us p-ast the theater o-n the west side, okay? I got to g-” Suddenly the call dropped, showing no signal. At the same time Holly ran out with her son RJ in her arms. She set him in the back seat and jumped into hers, her tires squealing as she backed out of her drive way. Just as she pulled out, the babysitter came running out of her front door, growling animalistically. Your eyes flashed from her to RJ, checking for any wounds which you found none. He was bawling, completely terrified.

“Hey, Tommy said drive to the west side past the theater and we can meet them there!” You said, climbing into the back seat to comfort RJ. You cradled the 2-year-old and hushed his sobs. He clung to you for dear life as you rocked him back and forth. You drove just outside of Austin, avoiding the mobs of people. Many people had the same idea as you but the flow of traffic stayed decent, only stopping every so often. The three of you rode in silence until a blockade came into view. It looked like the military was stopping people and directing them east. The exact opposite of where you needed to go. As Holly pulled up to the officers, they signaled her to roll her window down.

“How many in the car?” he asked, shining his flashlight in the vehicle.

“Just us three.” She answered.

He nodded, typing something on a tablet he held, “Okay, head east 15 minutes from here. There’s a larger Military presence over there and they’re taking survivors. I’ll add 2 women and a child to the list so they know you are coming.”

“No-No, we need to head west! We have people we need to meet!” You said quickly. The officer scowled and shined his light back to you and RJ who had calmed down into sniffles.

“Sorry ma’am but you can only go east. West side of Austin is under lockdown and no one can leave or enter. You go east.” He finished, walking to the car behind us.

You set RJ down next to you, buckling him in before returning to the front seat. “We need to find Joel and Tommy. We can’t go East.”

Holly shook her head, turning her tear-soaked cheeks to you. “No, we’re going east. I have RJ to think of, ___. If Joel and Tommy are smart, they’re already there waiting for you.” You sighed, defeatedly. She was right. The Miller brothers were very resourceful. It was a possibility. Maybe they were already at the safe zone. Same with your family. You nodded, your heart twisting in your chest as you agreed with her and then you were off.

It was a 15-minute drive but you could see the lights and helicopters before you even got there. It was massive and there were hundreds of people and tents popped up everywhere. It would be forever before you found anyone. The officers let you all in, setting you and Holly into a medical tent with a few other people. RJ slept in his mother's arms as the Doctors and Soldiers came in and out of each tent. Your leg bounced with anxiety. You glanced around the tent and around the area in general. People sobbed and cried and yelled, asking where their loved ones were, or what was going on, and saying they wanted to go home. You couldn’t help but to agree. You wanted nothing more than to go home and go to sleep and wake up and have this all be dream.

Some time passed before the fedra soldiers came back with water and blankets. They said they were transporting people to quarantine zones as soon as possible. You wanted to fight back and say you had people to find, but everyone was saying that. So you sat and obliged.

Finally, the doctors made their way into your tent, checking on the other habitants first. They did a full body check on the young girl sitting on the cot. She was clean. Next was the mother, she didn’t speak any English. She cried to the doctor, “Por favor, doctor. No estoy enfermo. Quiero irme a la casa.” The doctor just looked at her, checking her body over anyways. She cried and cried and your heart broke for her. It made you sick. You wanted to go home too, desperately. You wanted your mom or your sister. Or Joel. The doctor finished his search and nodded to the soldier. The soldier came over to the woman and dragged her away. Her daughter screamed on the cot as they subdued her. You couldn’t look anymore, it hurt too much. You averted your gaze back to Holly and RJ who was awake now, rambling in her arms. She raised her hand to wipe the hair out of his eyes, and that’s when you saw it. Your eyes widened as you noticed the three scratch marks on her wrist.

Present Day. It was fall now. Mid-October. The cold decided to make an early appearance and you were thankful for the older couple you’d stumbled upon a few weeks ago. They’d stocked you up with a good amount of food and a thick winter coat. The old man had been saying it was going to be a Winter with a sharp bite and offered you the jacket. Who were you to deny an old man and his wisdom? They let you stay there a couple days. Maybe they had been too trusting. You could have easily killed them while they slept a few doors down from you. You’d even thought about it. They had plenty of food and a barn with a couple cows and chickens. You could just take it if you had really wanted to. You hated that those were thoughts you had. They were showing you such kindness and trust, hell, the older woman even baked you a pie. A fresh baked pie?! It had been probably 20 years since you’d had one of those.

The course of the last 20 years moved in a blur. From you being split from anyone you’d known and sent to a QZ in Illinois, to that said QZ being destroyed by fireflies only 5 years of being there. You’ve had to do horrible, heinous things to survive; which you hated yourself for. You searched and searched for anyone familiar. Someone you’d gone to school with, babysat, or maybe a neighbor. Anyone. And that never happened.

As you scrambled for a place to find shelter, dark storm clouds rolled in, bringing a late fall storm. The trees all shades of burnt sienna and burgundy as their leaves fell to the ground, leaving the smell of their decay lingering in the air. It was a comfort to you. You’d always been a fall type of person and being out here in Wyoming, it was almost magical. You adored the whip of the wind across your skin as the air became colder, a few drops of rain kissing your cheeks. In the distance, you could see a small shack, clearly (hopefully) abandoned. You trudged on forth, minding the ache in your knees. You’d been walking for a while now, and you definitely weren’t 22 anymore.

As the shack came into a better view, the rain began falling harder. You picked up speed, not wanting to be completely soaked and thankfully mother nature allowed you to reach your destination before it really pelted down. Once inside you looked around and no surprise, it was empty. It was a small, dusty home. Only having a living area, kitchen and bathroom with a bedroom off to the side. You sat your backpack and rifle on the couch as you sat next to it, reclining and stretching into the cushion. You were so comfortable as you listened to the rain patter against the roof. The room was dark and cold, you couldn’t help but close your eyes and drift off for a bit.

You weren’t sure how much time had passed, but when you woke up it was still raining. You stretched, shaking off any remaining drowsiness but when you went to reach for your backpack a gun cocked at the back of your head. You froze, raising your hands in compliance.

“Stay fucking still.” The voice said. You blinked, annoyed with yourself that you let your guard down. “Don’t plan on going anywhere.” You retorted.

You sat there a few moments before another voice spoke, “Hey, kid! What are you doing?” The gun’s nozzle stayed firmly planted against your skull, “She was in here asleep! I was getting the upper hand!” The other person came up to your assailant and pushed the gun away before stepping in front of you, hand at her gun on her hip.

“Who are you?” She asked. She was average height, darker skin tone and had these beautiful braids in her hair. She seemed a bit younger than you but had to have been in her mid to late thirties.

“Doesn’t matter, I’m just passing by.” You sighed, not really in the mood for an interrogation. I mean, you’d just woken up.

“Why are you in the area?” she asked, probing further. The other person, a young girl, went to stand next to her, eyes locked tightly onto you. Did you really come off as that threatening? The girl had to have been 13-14 no older than that. Maybe 15. You couldn’t really tell.

“I told you. Just passing by.”

“Maria, she doesn’t really look like much of a threat...” The younger girl hushed. The older woman, now known as Maria, sighed. “What’s your name?”

“If I tell you, will you let me leave?” You asked, your annoyance increasing.

“It’s pouring still. You want to leave in the middle of a storm?” The younger one remarked.

You sighed, “It’s ___. My name is ___. I don’t have any intention of hurting or robbing or killing any of you. Just needed a place to stay while it rained. Is this your place? I didn’t mean to intrude.”

Maria shook her head. “No, it’s not. We were out on a hunt and it started pouring. Saw this place and had the same idea as you, I suppose.” Maria relaxed, removing her hand from her hip and settling down on a chair opposite from you. “I’m Maria. This is Ellie.”

Ellie scoffed, “Maria! We could have used fake names!” You smiled softly, loving the kick-back. Maria just shrugged, relaxing further into her chair. “Where you from, ___?”

Your eyebrow quirked as you thought of an answer, “Good question. Kind of everywhere. Midwest originally. Stayed in the Chicago QZ after the outbreak. Didn’t last long. Been traveling since.” Which was mostly true. You were in Texas of course for a while, and there had been groups you stayed with since the QZ fell, but none of them worked out in the end.

“Why Wyoming now?” She pondered.

“Well, just kind of found myself here. Was with a few people and that ended. Now? Well...”

“What happened to them?” Ellie asked.

“Doesn’t matter. Looks like the rain is letting up. Am I free to go?”

Maria sighed as she hesitated for a moment. Ellie watched her intently not quite sure where she was going. After some time, Maria spoke. “Alright. You can go if you’d like. Want to follow us though? We have a town a bit north from here. Could set you up a place to stay for a few nights, get you some food, a shower...?”

“A shower?” You asked incredulously. It’d been so long since you’d had a proper bath and you knew you needed one desperately.

She chuckled, nodding.

“A hot shower too!” Ellie chimed in.

You hesitated a moment, weighing your options. One, you could go and have an amazing shower and meal and sleep in a safe place... maybe even on a bed. Or two, it was a trap and they were going to sell you off or maybe even kill you and cook you. If it were the latter, they probably would have killed you by now, so you decided. Fuck it.

“You have a deal.”

You followed Maria and Ellie a few miles until a rather large town came into view. You could see the area had power as the sun had begun to set. Lights twinkled throughout the homes and your heart almost got caught in your throat. “You guys have electricity?”

Maria nodded, “Yep. We have a dam nearby that give us power and stuff.”

You all walked a bit more before finally reaching the town. It was massive considering things. As you approached the guarded gate, you could hear people chattering and kids laughing. What were you about to get yourself into?

Maria raised her hand at the guard who stood at his post, signaling for them to open the gate. As they did, a man rushed to Maria’s side pulling her into a tight hug. You didn’t pay much attention to it as you peered into the town, eyes wide.

“Where have you been? It’s been hours! I was worried sick!” He spoke. Maria rolled her eyes, “I don’t know if you knew this but it was raining cats and dogs about an hour ago? Ellie and I found a little shack and waited it out. We found her too.” She said, pointing towards you.

Your attention was brought back to Maria and as you looked to the man in front of her, your eyes widened even further. His face matched yours as you both stared at each other.

“T-Tommy...? No fucking way.” You stood there like you’d seen a ghost. Tears pricked your eyes and you blinked them away immediately, scared that if you looked away, he’d disappear. Tommy rushed to you, pulling you into a tight hug, squeezing the air out of your lungs. You clung back to him, letting the tears fall freely.

“___… I can’t believe it.” He breathed into the side of your head, bringing his hand up to your hair.

“I’m guessing you know each other?” Ellie asked.

The two of you embraced a moment longer before he let go of you, keeping you at arm's length. “What... where... I can’t even formulate a sentence right now.” He said, tears of his own stinging the corners of his eyes. You laughed, biting back more tears that dared to spill, “I’m in the same boat, Miller. It’s been so long.”

Your heart was pounding as you reunited with your former friend, just stuck in a state of shock that after all these years, you’d run into someone like Tommy Miller. What are the odds?

“This your place, Tommy?”

He nodded, “Yeah, Maria and I oversee things for the most part. Come on, let’s get some food in ya.”

You followed Tommy, Maria, and Ellie through the town until you reached the mess hall in the middle of it. As you walked through the streets, people greeted Tommy and Maria. They were doing their duties or relaxed on their porches, enjoying their space. Enjoying their life. Their guards totally let down. It was a sight to see. Children played with each other, splashing in the fresh rain puddles and chasing each other down in a game of tag. It was almost unreal.

The four of you entered the mess hall, the smell of fresh cooked food entering your nostrils. You’d been living off canned beans and peas for the past few weeks so your stomach was instantly rumbling. Tommy sat you at a table while he went and grabbed you a bowl of chili and bread. You could have cried as you ate your first bite; it was hot and fresh. “Is it good?” he laughed. All you could do was nod, stuffing your mouth with another spoonful.

After you ate, Tommy and you caught up to date as best as you could. Ellie and Maria had wandered off somewhere else leaving the two of you to yourselves. “So, you and Maria?” Tommy smiled, “Yeah. Couple years now. Even married her.”

Your eyes widened, smiling at your longtime friend, “No shit! Wow, who would have thought Tommy Miller to be married.”

He laughed, “Yeah, yeah. Such a shock, is it now?” You just laughed back, looking down at your empty bowl.

“What about you? Anyone special over the years?”

You rolled your eyes jokingly, “Maybe a few here and there. Nothing serious though.”

“Don’t know why. You’re still a looker.” He poked.

“There’s the Tommy I know and love.” You grinned, pushing his shoulder playfully, “Not everyone has the luxury of living in a town like this one and meeting the love of their life.”

Tommy leaned back in his chair, agreeing with you. “Well, maybe it’s sudden but you know how I am. You know you have a place here with us. We’ll set you up with a lil’ house. Get you on the board for some jobs. Wasn’t a doubt in my mind when I seen you out there that I was gonna let you leave again.”

“You gonna hold me hostage, Tommy?” You laughed.

“Might have to.”

You’d be a fool to pass it up, you knew it. But you were nervous. How could you adjust to a life of ‘normalcy’ after being essentially feral for so many years.

“Mind if I think on it a bit?” Tommy shook his head, “Take all the time you need. In the meantime, I got someone you might want to see.”

Your eyebrows knitted together in thought. Who could he have been talking about? And then it hit you. In the excitement of everything that had been happening in the last couple of hours, you hadn’t even considered the idea that Joel could be there. Your heart started pounding in your chest again, butterflies swarming in your stomach as the thought of seeing him entered your mind. You’d convinced yourself that he’d died years ago. That both him and Tommy had died and Tommy was in fact here before you. It’s been 20 years and the idea of seeing Joel Miller still sent you spiraling. “He isn’t…” you began. Tommy smiled at you as he radioed someone over the talkie, “Anyone got eyes on Joel?”

Your heart hammered so hard Tommy could probably hear it. He had to have been pulling your leg. You started becoming self-conscious. You hadn’t showered in weeks, you were grimy, you had aged. You couldn’t help but laugh to yourself because when was the last time you’d had to worry about that?

“He just got in from patrol, you need him?” A man said on the other side of the radio.

“Yeah, send him to the mess. Got someone he needs to see.”

“Roger that.”

Tommy made small talk while you both waited for Joel to arrive. You couldn’t process anything though. You were suddenly so nervous. How was he going to react? Would he be just so happy and cry? Yeah right, that was so anti-Joel it was laughable. Would he just be nonchalant? Like, wow. Been a while. Nice to see you. You couldn’t even predict it. Tommy could sense you were anxious and placed a hand on your shoulder to calm you down. “Hey… it’s Joel. You know him. No need to be nervous.”

He was right. You did know him. But the keyword was did. You knew him 20 years ago. You’ve changed since then so of course he’s changed as well. What if he didn’t even remember you? God, you’d be so embarrassed. “Y-You’re right. I’m just in my head I guess.”

“Well get out of it. I think you’ll be surprised. Want a drink?” He offered.

“God, yes. What do you have?”

“Well,” he began “probably don’t got those fruity little drinks you used to like but I can sure get you a glass of whiskey.”

You laughed, exhaling a breath you didn’t even know you were holding, “Okay. Whatever you got.”

Tommy returned with the drink quickly. You downed it as soon as it hit the table, the whiskey burned the back of your throat and chest as it went down.

“Still can’t shoot whiskey, huh?” Tommy teased. Your face scrunched up into a look of disgust, “Fuck, guess not. That’s awful.”

Tommy opened his mouth to say something but was distracted by the mess doors opening. There he was. Joel Miller in all his glory. Tommy walked up to the man, patting him on the back before striking up a conversation. You were out of earshot so you couldn’t hear anything but you weren’t sure you wanted to. If you were anxious before, you didn’t even know what to call how you felt right now. You felt like you could throw up on the spot, but maybe that was the whiskey talking. He was the same. A bit aged, but still Joel. His hair was grayer, bit longer too. Still scraggly, but it’s always suited him. Maybe he was a bit more muscular but you couldn’t exactly tell cause of all the layers he had on. You stirred in your seat as your heartbeat went a thousand miles per minute. He was here, and he was alive.

Tommy led Joel over to the bar and poured him a glass of amber liquid, maybe in a way to prepare him. Joel took a sip, not noticing that his brother had signaled you over. You stood from your chair, stomach in your ass as you made your way over to them. Nothing could prepare you for this. You had half a mind to run out and never look back. But your heart yearned for him, even if it were just to be in his presence, even just to say ‘Hi’.

You reached both men, standing at the chair behind Joel who had his back facing you.

After a moment of you trying to talk yourself up, you spoke. “I’ll have another one, Tommy.” You said, sliding your glass over to him. Joel turned around, finally aware of your presence. His eyes scanned up your body until they met your face.

A chill ran up Joel’s spine as he heard a voice ask for another drink. It was a voice he knew all too well. One he hadn’t heard in 20 years, besides in his dreams. His eyes met yours for a moment, until you turned away under his gaze. No words were said and honestly you didn’t feel like they needed to be. He stood from his chair and faced you fully, eyes shimmering behind the tired look on his face. Almost like he was renewed.

“Hi, Joel.” You managed to get out, your words finally finding you again. Confidence found you too as you looked the man in the eye. He sputtered a moment, not quite sure what to say before he decided nothing was best. He wrapped his big arms around your frame, pulling you in for a hug that was even tighter than Tommy’s. You hugged back, gripping to the back of his flannel. He smelled the same with just a hint of something new. That warm, musky Joel smell that reminded you of cedar and whiskey with the added sent of pine. You could have gotten drunk off it. Not in a million lifetimes could you have imagined the day would come where you were reunited with him. You had to have been dreaming. More tears spilled and you cursed yourself, tired of all the waterworks.

Joel held on to you for what seemed like an eternity. You didn’t mind at all. In fact, you welcomed it. It’d been too long since you’d been touched in general you hadn’t realized how much you’d been craving something like this, let alone from him.

“I’ll give the two of you a moment.” Tommy said, knocking on the bar and walking over to Ellie who was coincidentally walking up to you all and pulling her away with him, “Oh c’mon, Tommy!” She yelped.

Joel finally pulled away, but still keeping you at bay, “I don’t... I don’t understand. Where did you come from?” He was breathless. He kept thinking it was a dream, you being here. He didn’t want to wake up.

“Well, that’s a long story,” You laughed, “Most recently from Colorado. But it doesn’t matter. I don’t even know how we’re both here to be honest.”

Joel smiled down to you, his grip tightening, “It’s kind of unreal, right? I kind of.... thought-”

“That I died? Trust me, when I saw Tommy, it was like I’d seen a ghost.” You recalled, eyes softening as it really hit you that Joel was here in front of you. Unchanged, just slightly grayer.

“I-I looked for you... For years. I kind of went mad about it for a while. So much happened that night.” His face twisting into a look of discomfort as he remembered the night things started.

The two of you sat and spoke for hours, catching up on everything. Joel told you about Sarah and how Tommy stopped that soldier. You cried when he spoke about her; he teared up too. You told him about Holly and how she’d been taken that night. How you looked after RJ until he got sick one winter when he was 8. He didn’t make it either. He told you about the Boston QZ and people he’d met along the way. How he met Ellie and how that went down. You did the same. A lot was similar in the way you lost people, and a lot was different.

At some point during the conversation, Joel reached over the table and took your hands into his. You couldn’t even imagine pulling them away. By the time you caught each other up to speed, the clock above the mess door said it was nearly one in the morning. At this point, it was only you and Joel in the room. It was so strange to you how 20, almost 21 years had passed and it was like you’d talked to him yesterday. You both fell so naturally in line with each other, you had no idea why you were so nervous to begin with. The two of you sat in silence while Joel rubbed circles on the back of your hand with his thumb. You hadn’t felt this kind of comfort in so long, you didn’t want it to end.

Suddenly, the doors burst open to reveal an irritated Ellie and an exasperated Tommy. “Joel, you have all day tomorrow to catch up. You promised me you’d teach me that dumb song on your guitar.” she said, throwing her body down on the chair next to Joel.

“I’m sorry, we tried everything in our power to keep her entertained. You know how she is about her Joel.” Tommy joked, pushing Ellie’s head forward slightly.

Ellie scoffed, “Yeah, right. This old man? I’m just making sure he makes good of his promise.”

“You know I always do. But, she’s right. It is gettin' late. I’m sure you gotta be tired.” Joel said, looking over at you. You nodded, finally paying attention to how exhausted your body was.

“Yeah, I am. I’ll give you Joel back, Ellie.” You said smiling to her, “Tommy, you said you got a place I can stay a while?” He nodded, beckoning you with his hand to follow him. You went to follow him but not before Joel grabbed your wrist, stopping you from going any further.

“Promise we’ll talk tomorrow?” His eyes searching yours for something you weren’t sure of.

“’Course. I’m not going anywhere.” Your answer seemed to satisfy him as he gently let go of your wrist and stood. “Alright.”

The next few days flew by. You’d gotten cozy in your tiny home. Which really wasn’t so tiny. Two bedrooms, a working bathroom and kitchen. You could have died there you loved it so much. Tommy had taken you to the pantry to get some essentials stocked up in your house. They gave you a few days to settle in before getting your answer on if you’d be staying long term. Which, of course you were. You saw Joel and Ellie every day. She was always in tow behind him which you thought was the cutest thing ever. She’d been growing on you and you hoped you were growing on her as well. She acted tough at first, almost like she wasn’t interested in getting to know you, which Joel told you she’d come around. You really hoped for that. And you succeeded.

It seemed like Joel made up any excuse to see you throughout the day. Literally the most mundane things, and there he was. Knocking on that red front door of yours.

“Tommy told me the sink has been leaking. Figured I’d come take a look at it.”

“Actually, the sink has been doing just fine.”

“Oh, well. Maybe I should take a look anyways.”

Or, “I made an extra sandwich. PB&J. Ellie said she didn’t want it. I figured we could have lunch together.”

“Oh, I actually just made some eggs. Also, aren’t you on patrol today?” He pouted, “Oh, yeah. I have a lunch break though. It’s alright if you don’t want it. Jus’ thought I’d ask.”

“... a peanut butter and jelly sandwich sounds pretty good right now.”

And even, “Hey, Maria said they’re playing that one movie you liked at town hall tonight. The one with the green guy and the donkey?”

“Shrek?”

“Uh, yeah. I think so. Want to go watch it me? Or, uh... I mean, Ellie and I?”

“Sure, Joel. I’d love to.”

It was so funny to you. But you loved it. It was so in character for him to beat around the bush or to just make the little excuses to see you or hang out with you without just plain saying “Let’s do something.” You’d come to realize Joel really hadn’t changed much at all in the decades you’d been apart from him. At least, in the ways he’d been showing you. You also realized maybe you hadn’t changed much either over the years. You found yourself falling into ‘normalcy’ easily. You lived for the moments where Ellie would come over and ask you to have dinner with them. Or the little excuses Joel made up to see you. It filled your heart in ways you weren’t even aware of. You were excited to wake up each day, knowing you were with people. Maybe even your people.

Days turned into weeks and you’d even been assigned work at the preschool during the day. Sometimes you’d take shifts at the mess halls bar, serving drinks to the men and women in the town. You figured it was a good way to make friends. Joel and Ellie always sat at a table near the bar when you'd work with the excuse of keeping you company. Not that you minded, at all.

One night, a few months after settling in Jackson, you called Ellie over to the bar, “Hey, come here. Wanna teach you something.” Ellie pointed to herself making sure you were talking to her to which you nodded, smiling to her.

“What’s up?” She asked.

“Wanna learn how to make a drink?” You offered. Ellie’s eyes lit up and she agreed eagerly, “Um, yeah, duh! What drink?”

“Well, let’s see what we got. Not much to work with but here,” You said handing her the glass, “Put some ice in it, and fill it up to here with this.”

You handed Ellie the bottle of bourbon on the shelf behind you. She opened the bottle and filled the glass halfway, eyeballing it to exactly where you had pointed. “Hmm, how about we top it off with this?” It was an almost empty bottle of ginger ale. She followed your instructions, filling the glass to the brim. “Okay, now take this spoon, put it at the top of the cup and slam it to the bottom.”

Ellie looked at you with her eyebrows quirked, “Slam it? But why?”

You laughed, “Just do it. Trust me.”

Ellie tilted her head, unsure, but did it anyways. She slammed the spoon down, causing the glass to fizz up, nearly spilling over the edge. “Oh shit... Can I drink it now?” She asked eagerly.

You laughed again, now tilting your head as you thought a moment, “Well, not too sure about that one, Ellie. Why don’t you go ask your dad?”

Ellie grabbed the glass and carefully walked over to the table Joel was sitting at. You watched from a distance as she asked the older man if she could drink her creation. Joel looked over to you and gave you that look, you mouthed a sorry and stifled a giggle. “Not today, kiddo. Try again when you’re older.”

“Oh, c’mon, Joelllll. I can’t even have a sip?” She whined. It was endearing.

You watched as the two of them went back and forth, arguing over the drink and who was going to drink it. You smiled to yourself. The moment felt so... domestic. You didn’t know what to think of it. But by the way your heartbeat picked up, you figured you might have liked it.

You were cleaning glasses and organizing the liquor when a couple of men sat at the bar, and removed the hats off their heads. “Back from a late patrol, boys?” You asked, placing cups in front of them and pouring some whiskey into it.

“Yes, ma’am. Not much out there when it’s ‘bout 10 degrees and snowing.” One of them said. He was a regular. Here at the bar every Thursday and Friday. Maybe Sunday’s. You’d picked up from his friend that his name was Luke. He was younger. Probably about 25, maybe 26. His friend, who you learned was named James was a bit older. Mid-thirties, married, had two kids. They were both nice, however, James was a flirt despite being wed. Luke tried but he was pretty inexperienced. Both alright looking though, the younger being taller and thin, blond hair and blue eyes. The older one was shorter in stature, bit thicker, with darker hair and green eyes. If you were honest, you weren’t the biggest fan of James, but a you remained cordial.

“It is a chilly one out there,” James began, “Luke needs someone to keep him warm at night. You’re single, aren’t ya, ___?” He said, smiling. His grin somehow gave you bad vibes, but you smiled back nonetheless.

“I am. But I'm not looking right now. Sorry, Luke. I’m old enough to be your mom!” You laughed, finishing up wiping a couple of glasses and setting them in a tray under the bar. “Barely! Maybe if you were a teen mom or something.” He retorted. You just smiled and went about your business.

A little while later after a few more people came and drank, it was almost time to call it a night. You peaked behind the people finishing up their drinks and sure enough, Joel was still there, with a book, listening to the random music that played on the stereo. You bit your lip, hiding the smile that adorned it. He was always there.

“All I’m saying is that, if I weren’t married, I’d be all up on that! Luke, c’mon she’s a single cougar. Get your head in the game.” You overheard James's whispering to the younger man next to him. James sighed, “I don’t know, James. She’s been seen with that Miller guy. Not Tommy but the other one. He’s scary. Heard he’s killed a bunch’a guys.”

“Oh, come on. He’s not that bad. Just an old dude. Plus look at her. She’s fucking worth it, man. The ass she has on her? God, and those tits.” James continued.

You mentally scoffed. You figured he was a slime ball but this was just flat out gross. Thank God the mess hall was closing soon because you were about ready to give the man a piece of your mind. Suddenly, James said something, attempting to get your attention but you pretended not to hear.

“Helloooo! I said can Luke get another drink here?” He repeated himself.

“Oh, sorry. I’ll pour you one more but we gotta close up soon.” You replied, filling Luke’s glass once more.

“Jesus, Luke. You see that? Dumb and hot. I bet you could convince her to get in bed with you.” This was your last straw. You get they’d been drinking but they clearly lacked common sense. You turned to the sleazy drunk, ready to tear him a new one but it turned out you didn’t need to. You stood there; arms crossed waiting for whatever was going to happen next.

“What’sa matter, baby? Suddenly want a piece of what Jamesy-boy has to offer? Got enough to go around!” Your eyes rolled as he tried again, digging himself a further hole.

“Don’t think she likes what you’re offering her, Jamesy-boy.” Joel said behind him, placing both of his hands on either of James shoulders. Luke’s eyes widened at what was happening, or at least about to. He had some decency to know what James was saying was wrong, but he lacked the balls to say something about it.

“Wha-What... How would you know what she likes and doesn’t? How dare you come up and put your hands on m-” James bit his tongue when he turned around to see a seething Joel behind him.

“Wanna repeat what you were about to say?” Joel asked, leaning down into the man's face. James shook his head quickly, struggling to move from his seat as he was so frightened.

“If I see or hear you talking to her again, hell, even lookin’ at her, I’ll mess you up so bad, your wife won’t even want what ‘Jamesy-boy' has to offer. Y’hear me?” Your eyes widened at Joel’s threats and you couldn’t help but like what he was saying. His words turned in your stomach as you felt the heat build there and further down. Only God knew what that said about you.

James nodded, trying to slip past Joel. Luke got up as well, ready to follow his friend out. “I didn’t hear you say it. Out loud, now.”

“I-I won’t talk or look at her again. S-Sorry about that.” He stuttered.

“Good. Don’t apologize to me though.” Joel said, signaling over to you.

“I’m sorry, ___. It-It won’t happen again.” You nodded, acknowledging him, waving him away.

The two of them scurried away like the rats they were. Good riddance. You looked at Joel who was now sitting at the bar. “Jesus, Joel...”

He scoffed, “What? Was that not okay? He was harrassin-”

“I think you’ve gotten softer in your old age.” You chimed in. Joel stared at you, confused as to what the hell you were talking about.

“Excuse me?” He asked. “I told him I’d beat him so bad he’d be disfigured and that was soft?”

You laughed, finishing up the last of the cleaning before close. “Yeah. The old Joel I knew would deck a guy for saying something to me.”

Joel sat there a moment as he recalled the night at the bar where he broke a man's jaw for calling you a slut. He smiled lightly, “That’s right. You’re right... maybe I have gotten soft.”

Your eyes rolled as you grabbed your winter jacket and throwing it on, “Come on, softie. Walk me home.”

Joel obliged, getting up from his seat and following you out of the mess hall. The two of you walked into the frigid air, almost instantly shivering from the lack of warmth the place provided you. The sun had set a long time ago, leaving the milky blue hues of the night appear next to the luminescence of the moon. It was a sight. You stared up at the floating rock in the sky, entranced by its beauty. If everything in this world has changed, the moon stayed the same. You were a big fan. You were so engrossed in the way the moonlight shined; you had no clue someone was doing the same but to you. Joel walked with you, paying no mind to the road ahead of him. His eyes were on your frame, on the swell of your breasts, on your lips. He noted how your irises twinkled as you peered up to sky. It caused a lump to form in his throat, his heart rate picking up as he tried to swallow it down.

“Hey, Joel?” You asked suddenly, his gaze quickly leaving you as you looked to him.

“Yeah? What’s up?” He replied, clearing his throat.

“Back there… in the mess. I could have handled that myself.”

Joel was taken aback for a moment before chuckling softly, “Oh, darlin’ I know. He should have been more scared of what you were gonna do to him instead of me.”

You laughed back, nudging Joel on the shoulder with your own, “I mean it! I would have tore him apart had you not been there.”

Joel smiled, “I know, I know. Maybe I just wanted some points in my favor with you. Make me look cooler, maybe make you like me more.” He continued.

You looked at him with a confused face, “Like you more? Joel, I’m not sure if that’s even possible. I think I like you too much.” Your nerves started getting the better of you as you realized what you’d just said. Joel’s eyes widened but only for a second. He started slowing his steps down as he turned to you, “Like me too much, huh?”

“Just forget I said it.” You piped in quickly, trying to back track.

“Don’t think I can do that, darlin’.” Joel said, stopping you from going any further. He wrapped his calloused hand around your wrist, lightly pulling you to him. Your eyes softened as you looked up to the man, your cheeks reddening under the yellow-toned streetlight the two of you stood under. You wanted to look away. You didn’t want Joel to see the way he so easily made you blush. “Stop hiding from me. You look so pretty, tonight. You always do.” Joel placed his free hand under your jaw, leading your eyes to meet his.

“Why can’t you forget I said anything?” You hushed, entranced in the way he was looking at you. Like you were the most precious thing in the world. He just laughed, bringing his hand from your wrist to the other side of your face. “Don’t want to. Think I might like you too much, too.”

You smiled, heart racing, stomach flipping; everything. You brought your hands up to Joel’s jacket, running over the wrinkles until you hit his neck and kept them there. Snowflakes began to litter from the sky and danced around the two of you, melting as soon as they hit your bodies. “Well, Joel Miller. If you like me so much, why don’t you kiss me?”

“Can I?” he asked softly, nudging his nose with yours as he closed the space between you. All you could do was nod as your words failed. That’s all he needed before his lips were on yours. His soft lips met yours, only a little chapped. You moved with him as he kissed you, one of his hands wrapping around the back of your neck while the other fell to the nape of your spine. Your own hands wrapping around his neck and lacing through the bottom of his hair. You both stood there for what felt like forever, just enjoying the embrace. At one point Joel nipped the bottom of your lip, asking for an entrance. Your tongues moved and intertwined with each other as Joel deepened it even more. You didn’t want to break away as you were quite literally seeing stars and hearing fireworks but Joel stepped away first. “We-We need to stop, baby girl.” He said breathlessly.

“Why? I want to kiss you more.” You insisted, moving your head to kiss him again.

Joel grinned, pecking you again lightly once, twice, maybe a third time. “Trust me. I need to kiss you more. But not here.” You agreed with him as you pulled him further down the street. It was a straight shot to your house when suddenly Joel stopped again.

“What’s wrong?” You asked.

He hesitated, his face etched in concern. “You’re not gonna regret taking me home with you, are you?”

Your eyebrows pulled together as you looked at him like he’d said something ridiculous, because it was. “Joel, do you think I’d regret it?”

He hesitated, unsure of himself, “Don’t know... ‘S why I’m asking you. Don’t want you mixed up with the ‘crazy old guy’.”

You paused a moment, almost laughing at how silly it was. You walked right back up to Joel, placing both of your hands on his cheeks a pulled him into you, kissing him once again. It was full of intensity. You wanted to show Joel just how badly you wanted him, crazy or not. Hell, you were old too. Joel fell naturally into it, wrapping his arms around your body. He chased your lips like he was addicted. It sent you soaring. After a moment, you pulled away, “Come on. Take me to bed.”

Joel placed his forehead against yours, holding you to his body. You could hear the heavy, desperate breaths coming from him like he was wagering with himself. Joel cupped your face once again, his lips ghosting over yours before whispering, “Let’s go.”

The trip to your bedroom was hazy. You were so out of your mind with want for this man you were shaking. As soon as you both entered your room and the door was shut, Joel was at you. He shed you of the thick winter jacket you had on and the fleece sweater under that. You did the same to him, pushing off his coat and flannel in one go. Your lips met fiercely, your hands running up his chest to his neck, pulling him closer. You wanted to be engulfed in him in every way. It scared you a bit at how much you wanted him in this moment, how much you needed him. You shivered at the lack of clothing as Joel pulled your jeans down, leaving you in your bra and underwear. He stepped away but only for a moment as he discarded his shirt and worked on his pants. His eyes ever left your body. His breath grew heavy again, watching the way his chest puffed up and down. You could see the strain of his length, begging to be released as he stepped out of his own pants and returned to your body.

Joel kissed from your clavicle to your neck, biting and sucking as he saw fit. You moaned as you wrapped your arms around him, scratching his back lightly. He grunted, shuddering from the pain as it turned into pleasure. Joel grinded against you, his erection poking your belly. Your hand flew down to it, rubbing him through the fabric of his boxers. He sighed, kissing up your jaw to your mouth as he fucked into your hand. “f-fuck, baby girl. You’re drivin’ me insane.” He stuttered, his hands at your panties as he slid them down. He left them just below your ass, gripping your cheeks and kneading them in his large hands. You moaned again, your own hand slipping into his underwear as you continued your ministries. His cock was already slick with precum. God, he was so needy for you. Never in his life had he had a desire this intense. Both your bodies felt like fire as your fingertips danced over the expanse of each other’s skin.

You were just as desperate. You could feel the wetness drip from your folds on to where your underwear sat, your swollen bud just aching to be played with. It’s like Joel could sense that, as one of his hands left your ass and dipped inside of you. He circled your clit slowly at first which you could have cried at. You needed more. You bucked your hips into his hand and he got the hint, picking up his speed. You both stood there at the side of your bed, getting each other off. Both moaning into each other’s mouth, licking up his jaw as he did to yours.

“Baby, need to be inside of you. F-fuck, I’m goin’ crazy.” He breathed; his breath muted as he spoke against your lips. You were already so close from Joel working so hard on your clit, but you knew coming around his cock would be way more gratifying. You nodded, separating yourself from him as you shucked your bra off and climbed on to your mattress, minding the way you wiggled your behind ever-so-slightly to which Joel moaned out loud at. Joel rid himself from his boxers and climbed over to you, hovering over your body as he pecked hot, open-mouthed kisses up your body.

“You’re so f-fucking beautiful.” He spoke, eyes on you. Your own eyes rolled as you wrapped your hands around his neck pulling him in for another kiss.

“Quit buttering me up, Miller.” You sighed, licking a strip up his tongue. Joel’s grip on your waist tightened. He was so hard it was beginning to hurt. “Not doing no such thing, darlin’. You’re so fuckin’ pretty. Look at how hard you get me. Been doing this to me a while now. Just lookin’ at you, I could cum.” His words went straight into your heat as you clenched around nothing. You needed him in you or you’d quite literally die.

“Oh yeah? How long you been touching yourself to me?” You asked, your hand returning to his cock as you lined him up at your entrance. Joel slid his leaking tip in between your folds, running it up to your clit, rubbing there for a moment.

He laughed softly, “Long time, baby girl. Here and there before. But now that you’re here with me again; it’s almost every night.” Your back arched at his confession. There’d been many nights you’d lay awake since you moved to Jackson. Your mind thinking of the events of the day, but they’d always end up on Joel. They way he’d sip from his glass of whiskey, or bourbon. The way he’d come into the mess hall after a patrol, always a little disheveled and sweaty. Or the way he was always so intense with you, never looking away when you spoke, when you laughed. How he’d always find a way to have a hand on you, just to be as close as possible.

“Joel, put it in, fuck- all the way. Please fuck me.” You begged, your legs wrapping around his waist.

“You ready for me, sweetheart?” He asked, teasing your needy hole with his tip, pushing it in slowly. You nodded, lips back on his. Joel pushed himself in easily. You were beyond ready for him. He gasped at the sensation. He loved the feeling of his cock being swallowed up by you. He looked down at your cunt as he bottomed out, moaning at the sight.

“Jesus... you take me so well. Y’always have. Like you were made for me.”

His words sent you spiraling, your eyes rolling back as you felt his fat cock fill you up. He started at a slower pace that was still intense. His lips on yours as he kissed into your open mouth. You couldn’t help the moans and sighs that escaped your reddened, plump lips, abused from Joel’s own. Joel pumped into you, your slick mixing with his as you both created a symphony of wispy moans and slaps against each other’s skin. It was fucking beautiful. His hand pushed the stray hairs away from your face as he picked up speed, thrusting into you as the claps became louder. “Yes-s, take it. Let me see that pretty face of yours. So fucked out ‘cause of me.”

You loved how vocal he was. It was a driving force as he slammed into you, on the edge of his high. You were right behind him, the coil in the pit of your stomach on the verge of snapping. Joel’s thumb worked on your swollen bud again, circling quickly as he wanted you to come with him.

“Joel I-I'm so close, fuck!” You cried out, your arm thrown over your eyes as he rutted into you.

“Move that arm of yours, wanna see you when you come for me.” You obeyed, your arms wrapping back around his neck pulling him down to you. Joel kept his pace steady, and with a few more flicks of his thumb, you were unraveling. Your hand flew to his hair, gripping it as you moaned, calling out his name. Joel felt your cunt tighten around him, gripping him to you. “Yes, fuck, take it! ’s all yours, baby. Always yours.” His pace slowed; you felt the hot ropes of cum filling any leftover space inside you, coating you. Tears pricked your eyes as he continued the remainder of his thrusting, everything becoming too much.

Joel’s softened dick slid out of you and was replaced by two of his long fingers, “Don’t want you to waste a drop. Keep it all in, baby doll.”

Your eyes closed; body enamored with pleasure as your legs shook from the af effects of your orgasm. Joel collapsed on to you, pecking your chest and neck with more kisses and love bites. His hands found their way up to your hair and weaved into it. He wanted you close, but you weren’t going anywhere.

The room was quiet besides the sounds of both yours and Joel’s labored breaths. You could hear your heartbeat in your ears as you basked in the comfortable silence. It was a while before either of you spoke. You actually thought Joel had fallen asleep which sucked, cause while you loved him being on top of you, he was getting heavy.

“Do you regret it?” He spoke suddenly.

You pushed yourself up onto your elbows as you peered down to the older man on you. You looked at him incredulously, like you’d been shocked. “Regret what we just did?” He nodded slowly, eyes on yours.

“Joel,” You began, fully sitting up as you pulled him with you, “Why would you even ask that?”

“I just... Dunno. Just feel like you could do better than an old, crazy guy. Lots of guys ‘round here dying to have you even look at ‘em.”

You sighed, your shoulders slumping. Your hand reached out to Joel’s face, petting the grayed scruff on his jaw. You took some time to figure out how to say exactly what you were feeling, even then it was hard to explain. “If you think that, genuinely; You really must be an old, crazy man.” You laughed, trying to lighten the mood.

“I don’t think you realize that I am absolutely in love with you, Joel Miller.” Joel’s breath hitched as his eyes widened slightly. His heartrate picked back up. He really wasn’t expecting to hear that.

“Not Luke. Not James. No one else. Ever. I get that might be a lot to place on you so sudd-”

Before you could even end your sentence, Joel’s lips were on yours again. He kissed you so deeply, so passionately, that you could have exploded. Your body was so warm even with the bite of the negative temperatures outside. He pulled you on to his lap and just... held you. He held you so delicately, like you’d break with any amount of pressure. After a moment, he broke away and maybe you were just seeing things, but you could have sworn you saw a little tear drop, threatening to fall. Your eyes glazed over, tears of your own beckoning an appearance. You truly were just so in love with him, it was crazy. You’d only been reunited a few months back but, it was as if you’d spent the last 21 years with him. It felt as though no time was spent apart at all. Things between you just worked so naturally and flowed so well. Like you were made for him, just as he said. And as though he were made for you.

Another comfortable silence lingered in the air. You both just genuinely enjoyed the presence of one another. Joels hands rested at your waist, one them made its way to your back, rubbing small circles on to your skin. His head fell into you, resting just above your breast as he breathed you in. Your own hand had moved to his hair, scratching his head lightly.

Joel sucked in a big breath of air before speaking, “Don’t think I’ve heard those words in a couple’a decades.” You nodded along with him. It’d been a long time for you too. Joel looked up to you, too comfortable to move any further. His eyes glimmered as he looked into yours. It was as if you held the universe within those orbs of yours. He couldn’t look away.

“I am absolutely in love with you too, my sweet girl.” Now it was your turn to be surprised even if you weren’t really. Not like you’d been expecting him to say it, but it was still something. You couldn’t help but smile as a tear fell. You didn’t want to cry, not at all. But you couldn’t help it. Your body swelled with emotion as every cavity of you filled with love and admiration for this worn-down man in front of you. Both of you changed in so many ways, some for the better, maybe some for worse. But when you really looked at it, not so much was different. He was still Joel Miller, and he was yours.

“Good.” Was all you could say as more tears threatened to fall.

Joel smiled, a small laugh escaping his lips. “Good.”

taglist: @paleidiot, @aestheticangel612

i hope u all like this part! soft joel is my absolute weakness and i love writing him. i think i might take some requests so if anyone has any ideas for Joel Miller or even Din Djarin :o i’d be glad to see them! also lemme know if anyone else would like to be added to a taglist <3

likes and reblogs are always appreciated and welcomed <3

#pedro pascal #joel miller #joel miller x reader #tlou #the last of us #joel x reader #fanfiction #please lemme know if yall like it hehe

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prettyboyeddiemunson · 5 months

Note

Hi honey bee (let me know if you don’t like it 😅)

I’m having awful horrible day.

First time I talked to a guy for years, we been talking for four weeks, he was perfect (or so I thought.) i also brought new clothes, sexy clothes hehe. I brought the food yesterday to make dinner for him and I was so excited to having first date with him tomorrow, but then I got text messages from him today and he said that he had sex with someone last week, few fucking times. Broke my heart so hard 💔 what a worst first guy for over 13 years.

👉🏼👈🏼 I’m wondering can you write blurbs about how softly, sweet Eddie during sex tell me fuck that guy, remember his (Eddie) name and say “be mine. Please, be mine forever”?? 🥺

@nailbatanddungeon 🖤

first of all, im sorry that happened to you! men can suck sometimes, really bad, and i’m so sorry you’re going through this. hopefully this will cheer you up a little! 🥺

eddie would be so gentle with you. in fact, you’ve never seen him more gentle than he is tonight, taking his time with you and making you feel loved & appreciated. he knows you’re hurting still. you don’t have to say it; he just knows. he can sense it in the way you move, in the way you hold onto him, in the way you seem so distant yet so present all at once. he takes your face gently in his hands, kissing you sweetly before nuzzling his nose against yours.

“hey, look at me,” he says gently, rubbing his thumb over your lower lip. he stops what he’s doing, ignoring your whines of protest as he shakes his head. “we don’t have to do this.”

“but I want to,” you insist, bucking upward and moaning as you feel him inside of you. “i need you. you’re the only thing that can make me feel better right now.”

“don’t let him bring you down,” eddie says. “i know I was just a fling before, but i really care about you so deeply. more deeply than you’ll ever know.”

“then please keep fucking me,” you beg. “please eddie.”

“fuck that guy,” eddie says, thrusting slowly. “he never deserved you to begin with. you know, uh…”

“what?” you say, moaning as he thrusts against your sweet spot. “tell me.”

“i could be better for you,” he says. “so much better than that asshole. i want you to be mine forever, y/n.”

“prove it then,” you say with a smirk, gripping his back and anchoring your legs around his waist.

“oh?” he asks, a smug grin of his own forming. “you wanna forget his name, huh?”

“mmm hmm,” you say, biting your lower lip before kissing him. “wanna just know yours.”

“good,” he says, thrusting a bit harder now with a groan. “because by the time i’m finished with you, my name is all you’re ever going to fucking know.”

#eddie munson #eddie munson imagine #eddie munson x reader #eddie munson x fem reader #eddie munson x y/n #eddie munson x you #eddie munson blurb

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madarasgirl · 1 year

Text

A Love Letter to the King

Now on AO3!

I’ve been so distracted lately, mind filled with indecent thoughts of the Uchiha patriarch. Needed to get this out and hopefully alleviate my perpetually flooded basement. I present you with my many dirty snippets of fantasy strung together to form a little smutty fiction. This is an attempt to worship Madara in the bedroom.

Warnings: 18+, NSFW. Very descriptive smut, oral sex, kage bunshin no jutsu, group sex, anal sex, double penetration, light bondage, breeding, Madara is a dom, he loves his fem!reader, no abuse or non-consent. My first smut.

Be prepared. Steamy one-shot under the cut. 3070 words

As the last rays of sun filtered through the sheer curtains of your bedroom and died, you twirled your tongue around the silken skin covering Madara’s crown, slipping your tongue under his foreskin and back down again, tickling his sensitive frenulum. Your hands were busy peeling the skin on your man’s cock back and forth, up and down, repeatedly, massaging him, milking him. You inhaled his musky, male scent deeply, humming happily as you took more length down your throat until it hit the back. Taking a huge breath, you swallowed your gag, eyes watering when your nose finally met a soft bed of dark pubes. Steely shaft lodged down your throat, you proudly peeked up at Madara’s handsome visage.

Holy shit. Madara thought, desperately fighting every instinct to grab the back of your head and start fucking. No, he won’t hurt you. Calm down calm down calm down.

You gagged twice as Madara’s rock hard length kicked excitedly in your throat, tears spilling down your cheeks as you found a hand on your jaw that held you back. “Don’t force yourself,” Madara panted. “Are you sure you don’t want a safe word? Hn I will give you one anyways. It’ll be-”

“Hehe I don’t need one. I’m with you after all. I trust you more than anyone. What’s the worst that could happen?” You grinned up at the Uchiha cheekily before going back down, swallowing him whole and moaning. Madara groaned at the electric vibrations shooting through his cock. You sweet summer child.

You took your time worshipping your man with your face buried in his crotch, lapping at the large twin orbs and perineum below, tapping the jewels lightly when the hands gently stroking your face and weaving through your hair tightened. Sucking harder on the inside of his thigh to leave your mark, your hands greedily explored your lover –his sculpted abs, arms and chest thick with muscle, you grabbed his hard ass. You smirked to yourself as you saw Madara’s nuts draw upwards throughout your ministrations.

“Enough.” He grasped your upper arm to walk you away from the window to the bed, to your disagreement. “I’m not done with you yet!” You growled, mustering up your strength to try and wrestle him back into position to slurp up his delicious penis again. Madara’s eyes narrowed despite his amusement at your display, an elegant brow lifting. Plucking you off your feet by the hips, he threw you over a shoulder before striding to the bed and tossing you in. You squawked in indignance, but by then, he was already looming over you, silky tresses forming a curtain framing both your faces. Tonight is not for patience, Madara decided, sinking two fingers into your dripping folds.

“So wet already. Did you think you could stop me?”

You gasped. No matter how many times he took you, you still felt the initial stretch whenever he prepared you for penetration. But it stretched so good. You pushed back against his fingers and held his wrist, fingering yourself through his hand and moaning like a slut as he added a third finger.

“Mmm no. I like this position too. I think I’m getting exactly what I wanted,” you quipped, knowing that trying to boss Madara around would get a reaction out of him.

In response, Madara dipped down and lapped at your slick entrance, thumb applying hard pressure and dragging slowly against your clit. He inhaled and held his breath, savoring the sweet fragrance of your nectar.

“We will see.”

Suddenly the hand and warmth disappeared, only to be replaced by the smooth tip of his shaft, its foreskin fully retracted, completely erect. Madara shoved and hilted himself all at once, your breath leaving you as he immediately started a punishing pace. You were mesmerized by the sight of him rutting above you and the view of the connection point where two became one. You distantly wondered how something so large even fit.

Wrapping your legs around Madara’s waist, you mewled and gyrated upwards to meet his hips, hands hungry to find purchase wherever they could on his body.

“No.” Madara stilled.

Coming back down to Earth, your legs shook, but you obeyed him.

“Good girl.” You gulped at his expression now, dark amusement crinkling the edges of his obsidian eyes as he smiled at you. As he built up a tantalizing rhythm once more, you bravely pondered if you should try and fuck him back again.

Rational thought disappeared as an orgasm washed over you, your walls collapsing and convulsing around your partner, a string of unintelligible words leaving your mouth. You held onto your beloved to ground yourself, needing more –MORE– contact, wrapping your legs around his hips as your hands weaved into his mane.

Madara leered at you in satisfaction as you come undone before him –your back arched and throat exposed. “If you don’t stop squirming, I’ll pull out and leave you like this.” His hand reached for your neck and palmed it. No pressure applied, just him tracing up and down your throat as he grinned at you evilly.

What?! You were incredulous. How could he be so cruel when you were like this? Your jaws dropping and livid while still riding the waves of your release, you wanted nothing more than to slap that smug look off Madara’s stupid face.

“Or perhaps you’d like me to hold you down instead?”

You wanted to scream, but knew Madara would tease you more, so not knowing what else to say or do in this moment with your brain fried, you started crying instead. Witnessing your helpless display, his expression gentled. He was never able to deny you for THAT long. No matter, he could keep this going all night.

Madara bent down and put his weight on you as he grabbed both sides of your rump and pounded you into the mattress, balls slapping against your puckered orifice. To your relief, the new position allowed you to cling to your man as much as you needed. You sighed in contentment, revering his weight squishing you into the mattress, your pussy open and enjoying the onslaught, neither of you noticing the alarming squeals of your bed.

You finally looked at him again, only to find crimson staring hotly back at you, his eyelids peeled back impossibly wide as Madara hungrily drank you in. Were his pupils dilated? That was not a look you've seen before in a Sharingan. You stared back, captivated by his deadly form and unhinged expression. “He’s so beautiful” you thought. “Beautiful and dangerous,” you corrected yourself. But he was entirely yours. You whimpered, brain short-circuiting again as your nerves frayed and skin fried under his scorching treatment. You were simultaneously intimidated and intensely aroused for this man right now, the conflicting emotions boiling over to another orgasm.

Madara grunted and pushed in one last time before spilling his seed inside you. He kissed you hungrily, tongue dominating your mouth as you gave everything to him. The two of you rode your release, Madara slowly rocking against you while coming down from the pleasure, still sheathed within your cock sleeve. He hugged you closely to his chest and caressed the back of your head.

“You okay?” He asked.

You nuzzled against him, face pressed into his chest. “Couldn’t be better.” Your mind buzzed, the experience feeling like you got hit in the head by a meteor or two.

You weren’t sure how long you stayed like that, but somewhere along the way, Madara pulled out to lay beside you and continued cradling you like the treasure you were. You smiled to yourself, feeling his length still swollen. You detached yourself from his embrace to expose your ongoing heat as well.

“Madara……please…stop teasing me. Put it back in…” You wailed with your legs split and reached down to spread your vertical lips and show him your drooling pussy. “Please…please…I’m yours, have me.” You were now desperate and not above begging aloud. You needed to be filled up and fucked. You offered yourself again, as if you were paying homage to a god.

How did you go from being terrified of this wonderful man when you first met to this? This wanton, needy mess begging for more of Uchiha Madara’s cock?

“What a view,” Madara breathed out, proud of the sloppy mess he made between your legs. When you got like this, you usually brought out all his soft edges. But not tonight, when he already gave in to your pleading earlier. He had an idea.

“Of course,” he murmured. And like that, the dance continued.

_______________

As you were licking Madara clean of his cum, you relaxed into his gentle petting, ready to pass out in bliss. You gave him a silly smile.

Another set of hands brushed against your thighs, making your eyes snap open. A familiar voice started from yet another direction. “You thought I was finished?” You could only stare in horror as you looked around and discovered four additional pairs of eyes gazing darkly back at you in mirth.

“Ah –ah. Oh God.” No sassy comment came to mind. You were speechless.

“It’s just me, Y/N.” A Madara stepped up to your side to fondle and pinch your breasts. “Five-to-one. It’s the perfect ratio for playing games, don’t you think?”

Your mind melted from too many sets of hands groping you. There was the hand cupping your breast. A mouth on your other breast suckling the nipple. Another set of greedy hands kneaded your ass and seized your hips. A tongue slowly traced its way up your neck, leaving light butterfly kisses at your earlobes. Several fingers were buried in your sopping cunt, pumping.

“Did I already die and go to heaven?”

“I wouldn’t be there with you, love.”

You frowned at his reply as you distantly heard Madara mutter the name of some jutsu, then found your hands restrained. “Eeeeeepp!!!” You squeaked, eyes wide as you realized this time there was nothing you can hold onto as you faced five Madaras.

You were placed on your hands and knees. A hand wandered to your rear end and you felt a cold liquid applied as you were getting spit-roasted by two Madaras. A finger brushed your clit continuously. Feeling overwhelmed and helpless, you pushed back on the organ in your vagina. A finger dipped into your ass and you tensed, but you couldn’t look backwards, not when your mouth was so full and your head held in place.

The Madara in your mouth pulled out from your mouth to tilt your head up at him. He searched your face and eyes, unraveling his sensory abilities, carefully feeling for any hint you didn’t wish for what was to come. He found in you a blazing arousal, yes, but beyond that, utter trust and love. The part of his heart he thought he previously taught to close off ached. Before you, Madara didn’t know his broken heart would be capable of such intense love again after Izuna departed long ago. It made Madara once again feel a devotion that could drive him to insanity. He silently vowed to do better by you this time and protect you forever.

Nimble fingers traced around your rosebud, the touch feather light, as the digit already inside rotated back and forth, twisting, prodding. He beckoned for you to open for him. You were growing weak, unable to prop yourself up any longer without the support of your arms. A Madara chuckled and held you up with one hand on your chest, while an additional digit joining the unyielding one in your butt. You clenched and unclenched, relishing the stretching in your bottom even if you already felt stuffed.

The Madara inside your snatch grunted from your flexing pelvic muscles, the rhythmic contractions milked his member and pushed him over the edge. He withdrew and yet another Madara took his place, this one starting a hard, rapid tempo at once. You abruptly found yourself straddling him, breasts bouncing in his face while Madara #4 (5? You have no idea) positioned himself behind you, head bumping against your anus and pushing steadily.

You drew deep breaths and bore down, attempting to open your hole to ease the entry. Feeling needy, you whined and kissed the Madara under you, the one pummeling your cervix. You licked and nipped at his lower lip, rubbing your forehead against his as tears prickled your vision. The man in your ass bottomed out at last, pausing to give you a chance to adjust to his invasion.

A different Madara came up to your face to offer you his dick and you eagerly sucked it up to pacify yourself. You made an incomprehensible sound as you went into sensory overload from getting stuffed airtight, clenching hard at each of the organs penetrating you. The ass Madara picked up his pace, pulling himself out almost entirely before plunging back where he belonged.

“You feel delectable,” Madara remarked.

And you are divine, you thought back.

You swayed like a rag doll at the mercy of a relentless deity, rocking from being hammered from each angle, loving every moment of it. Your low calls echoed through the room, when a loud CRACK snapped you out of your stupor, gravity causing you to lose balance. Your scream was muffled by a Madara’s tool filling your gullet as you fell backwards.

As expected, none of these shinobi missed a beat. As the vertigo passed, you were suspended in the air by the same two Madara who were in your pelvis, safe from the wreck that was your bed as they continued to bang you from the front and back while standing. A strong set of hands clutched your butt possessively, another set of hands pressed into your hips to hold you up against them. Your legs waved lewdly in the air. Two rods pistoned tirelessly into your molten core, churning butter, what was deposited prior dripping onto the floor, the squelching of fluids obscene.

You eyed the ruins of your furniture and sigh, “Now I need a new bed.”

“Then come sleep in mine.”

Your eyes opened in surprise and you glanced at a Madara off to your side who was running hands down the length of the underside of your leg, carefully brushing the sweaty skin.

“Am I supposed to make the long walk to your house at the end of each day?” You replied weakly, leaning back on your lover and resigning yourself to sleeping on your mattress or couch until you arranged for a new bed frame.

“I’m serious. Come live with me.”

“Hn, I could always come pick you up.” A sharp thrust smacked your backside.

The Madara at your side turned. “She was not addressing you.” He glared viciously at himself. You snickered because of course Madara would argue with himself. But living with him…your tired mind wandered at the suggestion.

Ass Madara glared back at his maker and finished behind you, the original dismissing him in a cloud of smoke. You flailed briefly at the loss in support before he appeared at your rear and slid in easily. Madara groaned lowly as the pleasure his clone experienced rocked his world again. He whispered kind words of affection to you.

“You are mine,” he stated matter-of-factly. This one must be the original.

A translucent blanket of blue enveloped your world, several Susano’o ribs formed to possessively surround you and the remaining clones.

“I will always protect you.”

Within what was supposed to be the most sinister chakra, sandwiched between two Madaras while two more watched or caressed you, there was nowhere safer than in this tempestuous storm god’s embrace. There was nowhere you’d rather be.

“Yes. Yes to everything,” you answered him.

The jutsu restraining your arms vanished at once and you rejoiced in your new freedom. At last you can hold Madara back! You needed to touch him right now. You relaxed, legs entwining around clone Madara’s waist as you turned as much as you could to touch the real one’s face, fingers brushing over his eyebrows. You ran your other hand through his luscious raven strands to lock your fingertips around his nape and kissed him deeply, rolling your hips in a vain attempt to take even more of him.

Red eyes observed your every action, memorizing each minute change in expression with startling clarity.

“Madara, MADARA!“ You chanted his name like a prayer. You peered around at the Madara copies that appeared just as fiercely determined to protect as the original. Your breath hitched in panic. “Please don’t have your clones use Susano’o too! I understand your point!” You exclaimed, extremely worried your other belongings in the small apartment would break from Madara’s flexing.

You suddenly found your situation so ridiculous. Here you were with a broken bed after a long night of carnal activity, still getting railed by multiple copies of the same man inside the protection of his Susano’o. Your love for the only Uchiha Madara washed over you and you sobbed his name as a final orgasm wracked its way through your exhausted body.

---------------

“Spread yourself for me.” Huh? Your legs were already split wide open. Was he trying to break your hips? Possibly, but –oh.

“You are mine, no?” You flushed more, if it was even possible, as you caught on. You wordlessly submitted, tilting your hips to provide a better view, your legs spreading unbelievably wider. Then, parting your inner folds with one hand and pulling your rump apart with the other, you displayed your two open, dripping holes swollen from overuse.

Uchiha Madara studied your salacious exhibit, crimson irises meticulously scanning you from face to rear, eyes stopping at the oozing fluids saturating your nether regions.

"You are stunning," he observed.

He stroked himself before pushing inside once more, the inexplicable urge to claim you coming over him. Hot essence seared your insides and you collapsed like a limp bag of bones, dazed.

The gleaming moonlight illuminated your spent, naked forms tangled in each other. Two souls were one, everything was perfect. Madara wouldn’t trade this for anything.

“I love you,” you whispered.

I love you more, Madara thought, gazing softly at you, lacing his fingers through yours.

You smiled warmly at him. You knew you didn’t need a safe word.

~End~

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Umm that got out of hand. This was supposed to be a short smut fic ending after the first round and Madara’s clones popping up so I can laugh at us when we realize how much trouble we’re in. Instead I wrote out the group sex scene. *Face palm*

I headcanon that Madara is a very physical being and isn’t overly talkative during sex, preferring to show his feelings through actions, whether it’s touch or even the way he looks at you. While I believe he’s most vulnerable and most likely to engage in heart-to-heart post-coitus, he’s too overwhelmed by raw emotion at the end of my scene to articulate coherent thought, which was why he doesn’t verbally reply to you. Whatever he says though, he means 100% and he already called you "love" earlier.

Hope you enjoyed this work of love as much I did writing it.

Didn't want to insert a "big balls" joke in the story. Here's a Tengai Shinsei gif to remind us of the actual size of Madara's glorious nuts

#madara uchiha #uchiha madara #madara fanfiction #madara smut #brat tamer madara #madara x you #madara x reader #madara x y/n #hornyaf #I am dirty so what

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