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#she started talking and revealing stuff that i had confide to her to other people and they slowly started drifting from me
lisxdumbr · 21 days
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The whole "if a person is mad at you it's their responsibility to tell you" thing just made me realize how fucked my situation is. Like just. woah
#who wants to hesr the story of how I lost my irl friends recently (you will I'm spitting everything right now)#anyway so last year one day one of my friends decided to randomly backstab me and she started talking behind my back#and yeah this all made me mad because?? what the fuck#she started talking and revealing stuff that i had confide to her to other people and they slowly started drifting from me#BUt the thing here is that she was manipulating the story. she changed it every time she told stuff to people to make me look bad#i heard one of the things she said about me once and i was like ?? she even make me dislike me in her version which like woa#anyway I didn't understand why she did that because it was ? so random? and then she started ignoring me and has not talked to me ever since#the thing is. she apparently didn't have enough with just doing that. she slowly started to rot my other friends' brains too?#in the sense that. suddenly the rest of my group was ignoring me too. they never said anything to me. or stated that they had a problem#they just ignored me in my face? and yeah that. hurt#recently i found thanks to a third party that one of them decided to stop talking to me because apparently i had hurt her uncountable times#and she was just soo sick and tired of me doing that. which. honestly made me mad because she did not ever express that to me?? so#what was i supposed to do. if she never said anything.#anyway one of my friends confronted her about the treatment they were giving to me. the whole exclusion thing. and her answer was-#”well it's not my fault that she doesn't have more friends and doesn't talk to people”#and i was like. woah. what a poor reply. is that really it.. also apparently they all had agree to stop talking to me as a group-#-and they never informed me so. thank you?#and I'm still here asking what i did to that ex friend of mine. later on i found out she had hooked up with the guy i used to like btw#and she kept it secret. oh and then i started dating my current partner ! person she also felt attracted to. and that's my only explanation.#she started gossiping after what happened with the first guy. so that's really everything that comes to mind as a reason#ANYWAY now that i was at the hospital i didn't receive a single text from any of them. so i guess that was it. people who don't care-#-like that are not friends. those people are not my friends. people who ignore me on purpose and gossip like that are not. my friends#so yeah that's why I've been feeling down lately but ! here I am i ended up ranting so. much#rant#vent#?#woah i actually feel so much better after spitting it all#I'm also following that sour grape advice btw I'm not giving them the privilege of cutting me out. I'M the one who dislikes them now
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slxtslovebambi · 1 year
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𝙒𝙚𝙩 𝘿𝙧𝙚𝙖𝙢𝙯 💦 💭
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Eren Yeager x Fem!reader | MDNI
Mentions of: Armin, Jean and Connie.
Synopsis: based of : Wet Dreamz by J. Cole.
[ Eren basically is a loner without any game. He finds himself crushing over the popular girl that sits next to him in his math class and keeps passing him cute letters and notes, praying that she’ll be the one that’s going to take his virginity!]
Warnings: Fem!reader, mentions of sex, Eren being head over heels for you, mentions of virginity loss, cuss words etc.
Wc: 2k+
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Eren has always been a laid back kid.
He likes video games, smoking and staying out of drama.
Of course he like girls and stuff like that too, it’s just that he never really went out of his way to try and talk to them. The girls at his college are mostly not interested in him anyways since he’s kinda a loner and he’s not interested in changing anything about that…
At least that’s what he thought until he first met you. He could never forget the day you walked into his math class and sat down next to him, with a warm smile on your face and a cherry lollipop between your plump lips. He immediately noticed your pretty face and the way you smell.
He found himself so fascinated with the way your hair looked that whenever he was watching porn late at night by himself in his college dorm, he specifically looked for girls with a similar hair type. He loved talking to you just to hear your soft voice and cute giggles, but after your professor expressed multiple times that he doesn’t want you guys to distract the other students, you had to switch to exchanging small letters and notes.
At this point Eren has a whole little box full of notes that you wrote him since the beginning of the year.
Everything started off so innocent until you started flirting with him, trying to make him blush and get a reaction out of him, like the virgin whore that he was. Attending classes felt like a reward now, since he gets to spend time with you on a daily basis.
You often catch him starring at you, but you never thought much about it.
If only you knew that secretly he was wondering if you’d be able to make him nut the same way it feels like when he does it himself to your photos.
You’re not the it girl at campus but you are popular for sure. You’ve always been pretty confident, not taking shit from people and making sure that everybody knew not to play around with you. He’s truly fascinated by you and he finds himself quickly developing feelings for you.
Even his friends noticed his behavior change. Since he met you he’s daydreaming a lot more, mostly about the way that your thighs would make a perfect pillow or the cute pout you have on your lips when you don’t understand something and you have to ask him for help.
"Bruh what the fuck? Yoo Eren? Earth to Eren?"
Connie waves his hand in front of Eren's face to catch his attention.
"Huh?" Eren responds, snapping out of his hypnotic state.
"We’re asking if you’re coming to the party on Saturday?" Connie asks curiously.
"Nah I’m busy this weekend, sorry guys." He mutters quietly in response.
"What do you mean you’re busy? You never miss a party!" Jean looks at him shocked.
"Y/n is coming over this weekend, that’s why he’s acting that way." Armin reveals his best friends secret with a smirk on his face.
"He even told me I’m not allowed to come home till Sunday." He continues.
"Wait, wait, WAIT! Y/n L/n? Bro you better forget about her." Connie looks at Eren like he’s insane.
"What? Why?" Eren looks up to his friend, suddenly all ears again.
"She’s like wayyy out of your league, there’s no way she’d let you try anything with her!" Jean shakes his head, trying to prepare his friend for a heart break.
"Who said I wanna 'try anything’?" Eren starts getting annoyed. He knows all of those things but that’s not gonna stop him from dreaming night and day about your pretty lips warped around his dick, crying and gagging for him with that seducing look on your face that you always give him.
"Ohh right, I forgot our boy is still a virgin. Don’t worry, you’re not less of a man!"
Jean ruffles through Eren's hair.
"I never said I was?!" Eren looks offended over at his friend.
"Yeah but you thought it." Connie laughs.
"I hate you guys." He just rolls his eyes… but what if they are right?
Did he ever have a real chance with you?
And do you even like him?
Friday was like any other day…
at least that’s what Eren expected when he sat down next to you like usually.
You immediately noticed that something was off. He seemed so cold and distant and even after you asked him "did I do something wrong?", with a cute pout on your face, he only responded with a "nah don’t worry." before turning his head away from you again. The truth is that Eren was just scared. Hurt and scared to be specific.
What if Jean and Connie were right, and he’s just your way of passing time during your boring lectures.
He always felt a little delusional for thinking there could be something going on between you guys, but the conversation he had with his friends yesterday just made things worse.
Eren basically ignored you for almost the entire lecture, thinking about thousands of reasons why you could think that he’s not good enough for you.
He always had his fair share of insecurities, but he still hoped you’d like him regardless.
However all of his worries got dismissed after he opened the letter you passed him when nobody was looking.
'𝑯𝒂𝒗𝒆 𝒚𝒐𝒖 𝒆𝒗𝒆𝒓 𝒉𝒂𝒅 𝒔𝒆𝒙 𝒃𝒆𝒇𝒐𝒓𝒆?'
It said, written perfectly in your handwriting.
You smile at him innocently before tapping the end of your pencil against your bottom lip.
There’s no way you would write something like that if you weren’t interested in him… right?…
You’re so cruel for playing around with him like that. At this point it doesn’t even matter anymore if all of this is a joke or game to you, Eren is willing to risk it all.
If he ever had the glimpse of a chance with you, then now is the time to make use of it and shoot his shot. He’s definitely going to keep the note and brag about it to his friends though, simply to prove them that he’s not some virgin loser and that he knows how to talk to girls, even if he doesn’t do it a lot.
He smiles softly to himself before ripping out a piece of paper from his notebook and scribbling something on it.
He hands it to you while giving you a cocky attitude. '𝘖𝘧 𝘤𝘰𝘶𝘳𝘴𝘦 𝘐 𝘩𝘢𝘥 𝘴𝘦𝘹 𝘣𝘦𝘧𝘰𝘳𝘦' You read on it. '𝑶𝒉 𝒓𝒆𝒂𝒍𝒍𝒚?' you write back with a sly smirk on your lips.
'𝘐 𝘮𝘦𝘢𝘯… 𝘐 𝘥𝘰𝘯’𝘵 𝘸𝘢𝘯𝘯𝘢 𝘣𝘳𝘢𝘨 𝘰𝘳 𝘢𝘯𝘺𝘵𝘩𝘪𝘯𝘨 𝘣𝘶𝘵 𝘐 𝘨𝘶𝘦𝘴𝘴 𝘺𝘰𝘶 𝘤𝘰𝘶𝘭𝘥 𝘤𝘢𝘭𝘭 𝘮𝘦 𝘴𝘰𝘮𝘦𝘵𝘩𝘪𝘯𝘨 𝘭𝘪𝘬𝘦 𝘢 𝘱𝘳𝘰'
If having wet dreams about you would count, he’d definitely be considered a pro… so it’s not that much of a lie is it?
'𝒐𝒉 𝒔𝒐 𝒚𝒐𝒖’𝒓𝒆 𝒂 𝒑𝒓𝒐? 𝒀𝒐𝒖 𝒃𝒆𝒕𝒕𝒆𝒓 𝒑𝒓𝒐𝒗𝒆 𝒕𝒉𝒂𝒕 𝒕𝒐 𝒎𝒆 𝒕𝒐𝒎𝒐𝒓𝒓𝒐𝒘' You giggle in amusement before you give him the small note.
~That girl is going to be the death of me ~
Eren thinks to himself as he noticed the bugle in his pants. Luckily none of his friends were here, seeing him embarrassed at the fact that he is fully bricked up, because of you just writing on a stupid piece of paper.
'𝘴𝘰𝘶𝘯𝘥𝘴 𝘭𝘪𝘬𝘦 𝘢 𝘱𝘭𝘢𝘯' he writes back, trying to keep his cool to impress you.
Deep down he knew he’s scared to death right now, even if he doesn’t want to admit it…
"You’re still here? Get the fuck out Armin, Y/n's gonna be here in like one hour and I still need to…get ready!" Eren bursts into Armin’s room after hearing him talk on the phone.
He never wanted to impress a girl so bad in his life.
"Shut up Eren I’m talking to my mom!"
Armin puts his phone on silent as he tries to make Eren leave by pushing him away with one hand.
"Fuck no, don’t ruin this for me! You need to leave."
Armin unmutes his phone before he sighs and starts speaking again.
"Wait mom, I- I’m gonna call you back. Yes I promise I won’t drink much. Okay, yeah love you too, bye." He hangs up. "what the hell is wrong with you man?!" he glares at Eren. "Did you already pack your things?" Eren continues bugging him.
"Yes I did, now stop rushing me or I’ll tell Jean and Connie that you practiced how to put on condoms last night!" Armin threatens him, remembering the painfully awkward encounter he had with his best friend.
"Okay okay but you have to leave now, please Armin." Eren nearly begs. This is one of the most important days in his life, there’s no way he going to let anybody fuck this up.
"Fine, I was about to leave anyways." Armin sighs while rolling his eyes as he takes his backpack from his bed and puts it on before grabbing his keys from his nightstand. "Thank you man I love you!" Eren says relived, following Armin to the door.
"Yeah whatever." Armin says before walking out of the door and closing it behind him.
The entire hour that Eren had left, he spent by lighting up scented candles around the house and praying that he won’t mess up, not tonight.
It can’t be that hard right? He watched enough porn to know the basics, he just hopes that you won’t notice it’s his first time.
The moment the doorbell rang he almost had a stroke…. However it was nothing compared to the way his heart was beating fast when you sat down beside him on his bed after he lead you in his room.
Fake it till you make it right? That’s what Eren thought when he started kissing you, pretending that his last kiss wasn’t in middle school. Getting hard on time was much easier than he thought it would be.
He felt his heart skip a beat when your warm hand slides under his shirt as you start trailing your fingers over his abs. Your skin is so unbelievably soft, it feels like heaven. You make him take off his shirt and play with the buckle of his belt before he pulls your face closer by your chin, only leaving inches between you.
"You’re so fucking pretty." He mutters under his breath while inspecting your face.
He always wanted to have you to himself, and seeing you like this, so desperately craving his touch just drives him crazy.
Usually he feels like you hold this power over him, but you whispering quietly in his ear "I want you so bad." was a major ego boost to him.
He can’t believe that his friends almost had him convinced that he wasn’t good enough for you… ridiculous.
He takes off your dress and removes your underwear, as he watches your nipples get hard at the cool air, with a smirk on his face, before he takes out a condom from his pocket.
It’s now or never.
He gets rid of his pants and puts on the elastic rubber just like he practiced the night before.
Now that he’s so close to losing his virginity, realization hits him, killing the adrenaline that just rushed through his veins.
He feels the palms of his hands getting sweaty and his breath quicken as he tries to keep himself from panicking to much.
He takes a deep breath and moves his hardened member to your entrance before you flinch and stop him right when he’s about to put it in.
"What’s wrong?" He asked confused.
Did you notice that he’s completely inexperienced? This is so embarrassing, he should have just told you the truth when he had the chance to.
"I need to tell you something…" you shyly look up to him. "Did… Did I do something wrong?" Eren says, worried that he’s making you feel uncomfortable.
"No it’s just,… please be gentle okay?" You try to avoid eye contact before continuing.
"Don’t laugh at me but… I-I never did this before."
Eren chuckles lightly to himself.
"I’ll try to keep it down for ya."
This is going to be so much more fun than he thought it would be.
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Hope you enjoyed it, I refuse to believe that there’s people out there that don’t know the song, but if you don’t I can only recommend listening to it! 🧎🏾‍♀️
most recent work <3
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lustkillers · 9 months
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BEGGIN' ON HER KNEES TO BE POPULAR !
⊹₊ ⋆ summary. - she wants more fame, he's helping her gain that.
┃ tags/warnings. ࿐ ❪ probably not set in the right era, nsfw freak shit. dom!euronymous, sub!reader. reader and euro are opposites, unprotected sex, degradation, praising, crying, face-fucking, reader and euro make a sex tape, office sex? exhibitionism?? creampie, freak shit. ❫
⊹₊ ⋆ pairing - euronymous x famous!fem!reader. ❪ not the actual euronymous, only rory’s portrayal. ❫
⊹₊ ⋆ note - fucking hate the idol show, but this song is so orgasmic for no reason. not proofread.
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THE first time you both met, the venue was flashing red and blue lights. You were downing shots with friends, and his fingers were playing on the stringed instrument.
He was mesmerizing you with his skill and confidence. You felt a shared electric current buzzing in the air, and before you could shift your gaze away he had already caught it. His eyes were remote, yet deep; like an ocean full of secrets that only revealed themselves when someone is brave enough to swim away from shore.
It was like his music seduced you, as you got up from your spot in the venue, his eyes followed you. You felt an exciting but strange feeling in the pit of your stomach as you started swaying your body with the music.
You could feel his gaze burning into the back of your neck. He knew who you were, and before you knew it his time was up on stage, now standing right beside you, his hands on your hips. Your heart raced as you looked into his eyes, feeling the same electric current that had taken over your body earlier.
A surge of confidence jolted through your veins as the music kept playing, your hips grinding on his slightly-toned body. The atmosphere in the room was intense and before you knew it, time froze as his lips brushed up against yours.
The sensation of his lips on yours sent shivers down your spine, making every inch of your body tingle with anticipation. You leaned in closer to him, wanting more as he deepened the kiss.
But that's where your first encounter ended.
After that encounter happened, you still kept in touch. He still did his music, and you did yours. Every time he'd perform, you'd find yourself in the crowd, watching him with a newfound appreciation for his passion.
However, as his music career boosted, yours declined. He started to get more and more attention from other people, leaving you feeling a little bit jealous. You couldn't help but feel a bit of envy as you watched him perform and receive praise.
"How'd you do it?" You were now talking to him after his show, your question masked by the thumping of music.
He didn't answer you, putting his stuff away. You cleared your throat, feeling embarrassed for asking him that question.
You really needed his help, and you were willing to anything. You were desperate.
"Look, I need your help. My shit isn’t going well, and I don't know what else to do," you pleaded, your voice barely audible over the loud music.
He looked at you, smirking. "Maybe if we worked together, I could help," he said finally.
You raised an eyebrow, "Together? How is that going to work?" He smiled mischievously, "Come by Helvete tomorrow, and you'll find out." And with that, he left you alone, your stomach feeling warm at his words.
The next day, you made your way to Helvete. He was already there, waiting for you. He motioned to his office, gesturing for you to enter.
Once inside, you stood there awkwardly, unsure of what to do. He smiled. "I think I have a way that we can help each other out," he said.
His expression shifted to a lust filled one, and you felt your face flush. He licked his lips and you knew what he was suggesting. "On your knees, slut." He commanded.
Your heart began to race and you felt a mix of fear and excitement at his words. You slowly got on your knees, bracing yourself for whatever was coming next. He stepped closer to you and grabbed ahold of your chin, lifting it up so he could look into your eyes. "Now, I’m going to help you, and in return you’re going to help me." He said with a smirk.
You nodded, unable to speak, as he explained the terms of your agreement, bringing in the factor of him recording you both. When he was finished, you swallowed hard and looked him in the eyes. You knew that if you said yes it would change your life forever--but it was a risk that seemed worth taking.
He smiled, satisfied with your response. "Good girl," he said as he reached out and grasped the back of your neck roughly, pulling you into a passionate kiss. You felt like your heart was going to burst out of your chest as the intensity of his lips grew stronger and stronger. When he finally pulled away you were left feeling breathless and dizzy-- but you couldn't deny the warmth that was spreading through your body.
He pushed you back onto your knees, looking down at you with a satisfied smirk. "Now, if you want to keep your end of the bargain," he continued, his voice low and threatening, "you're going to do exactly what I say."
His words made you more aroused, and if he kept it up for much longer, you were probably going to be in a pool of your wetness.
His hands unzipped his pants, revealing his cock. Your eyes slightly widened, and you found yourself salivating at the thought of it inside of you.
He commanded you to take him in your mouth, and with a deep breath, you complied. You ran your tongue around his hardness before taking him into your mouth fully. He moaned in pleasure as he grabbed onto the back of your head, gently pushing himself deeper and deeper down your throat, now gaining control.
He started to thrust faster and deeper, your spit pooling out the sides of your face. His cock speared to the back of your throat, and you started to gag. You tried to pull away, but his fingers were still intertwined in your hair, refusing for you to get away.
It went on for a couple of more minutes, and you were moments away from passing out. He pulled out, a line of spit connected between your lips and his cock. He smiled down on you, enjoying the view of you in a state of utter submission.
"Up, bitch." He commanded. You got up, unsteady on your feet, and he pulled you into a rough kiss. He licked your lips, tasted himself on you. His hands wandered down your body, cupping and squeezing every inch of you as he kissed you deeply.
Both of you slowly walked to his desk, both of you removing your clothes. He laid you down, his hands caressing and exploring every inch of your body. His lips pressed against yours, leaving a light trail down to your neck.
His hands moved lower, fingers gently teasing your wet folds before entering you. You gasped in pleasure as he thrust gently inside of you, sending waves of pleasure coursing through your body as he increased the intensity of his thrusts.
"F-Fuck, Euro!" You cried out, your breathing quickening as he continued to thrust in and out of you. He smiled down at your blissful expression before increasing the speed, his hands gripping your hips tightly.
You moaned in pleasure and closed your eyes, surrendering to the sensation of his rushing within you. His hands roamed all over you as he took in every moan and scream of pleasure with each thrust.
The pleasure felt suffocating, your head going dizzy. "M'gonna cum," you babbled out.
Euro's eyes lit up as he picked up the pace, pushing you closer and closer until you finally tumbled over the edge. You screamed out his name like a prayer as your body quivered in pleasure.
His movements became more erratic and intense, chanting your name with profanities. You still felt sensitive, the pleasure almost knocking you out.
You felt a hot burst fill you, his arms trembling as he thrust deeper and held himself inside you, stuffing you full. You both lay still, panting as he remained inside you.
Euronymous squatted down to your puffed-out pussy, his mouth attaching to it. He licked and sucked on your sensitive flesh, sending sensations all through you.
Your hands tangled through his hair, "S'too much!" You cried out, but still needy for more. He chuckled, his hands caressing your thighs as he kept licking and sucking.
He paid attention to every inch of you, lavishing in the taste of your orgasm-induced cum until finally you could take no more.
You laid there, feeling utterly satisfied, as Euronymous got up and walked to the camera, turning it off, smirking.
"That was quite the show, wasn't it?" He said with a wink.
You blushed and smiled, feeling content inside as you thought of what just happened. You were left feeling content in a way you hadn't before, and you knew that this would be something that neither of you would forget.
You bit your lip, smiling at him as your hair was tousled. This was it, you both did it.
You were going to be famous.
"BEAUTIFUL BABE GETS FUCKED BY GUITARIST, EURONYMOUS! WATCH NOW!"
And you did.
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robin33r · 14 days
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TAURTIS.
Taurtis isn't talked about enough. He's genuinely gotten drowned out and it's golly awful!!! Everyone's so focused on Sam and grian and their stuff taurtis gets drowned out.
Taurtis is such an anomaly and he is MORE than just some silly guy who's Sam's best friend. I'd argue he's just as bad or maybe even a tad bit worse. Hear me out.
Straight up at the beginning of the series, no one mentions (outside of like 2 people) that taurtis has killed someone and made it on TV while getting away with it. Bros the first murderer we see in the season revealed and hey, this can imply he's done it before and never gotten caught. Taurtis knows damn well how things are and id argue hes the result behind Sam's behavior. Not Yuki, while she did also heavily influence him, he did a lot more damage.
No one ever mentions ot though because he's just a "silly little guy"
Even from the start Taurtis has been seen making these decisions for Sam but the way they work is making it look like the others independent when I can argue they're both codependent on eachother in a way. Taurtis even convinces and forces the idea of Sam doing things for to a sense someone can see "for his (Sam's) own good" When Sam was in love with Sookie and found out she was into women, he was bummed out, however Taurtis was the one who suggested he could chop her up or get Sam to dress as a girl in which; he even protested at first and kept denying. Taurtis in the beginning had a small weird obsession with when things went wrong; they could resort to "chop chop" It is known and we all talk about Sam and Yuki being a yandere but what about Taurtis being one potentially? I know this can be diminished by the nice treatment Salex (I have a whole another yap session about salex and him and sam) The second Sam said he had no chance with Sookie, Taurtis asked about using force and deceiving to help get Sam what he wants. Also for whatever reason he has a TON of images of Sam on his phone canonically?? Am I the only one who's taking that into acc?
Sam is EASILY one of the most quick-to-influence characters in the series and can easily be manipulated, despite being described as a manipulator himself. And the person who's been with him the most in life and who's been living ALONE with for who knows what time? For Sam to having gone down the rabbit hole he is, the person who'd have tk influence that would have to be Taurtis. He encourages and excuses everything and I'd argue he even partakes in stuff in his own time. There's also the fact he has no problem hurting his own friends as well, he's CONSTANTLY being physical with Sam and he doesn't even care with Stabbing him off a building as a friendly gesture to a sense. There's also the fact he literally doesn't care if someone (coughs SAM) plays dress up with him whenever they want, it's fine its whatever right?? He could care less about that stuff
HOWEVER in the end he's still a teenager, he's a genuinely insecure teenager. It's not directly stated however it is very much implied with his reactions and interactions and his need/drive to impress others and for them to be impressed by and to want him. He almost needs people to need him and that's probably part of what makes him happy about Sam's codependency because he knows Sam needs Taurtis. Taurtis needs someone to need him, which is probably what started his infatuation with salex because she always praised and flirted with him and fueled his confidence; that's what he wants or "needs." That's part of where I think not only Sam but TAURTIS is also codependent in his own way. It's an eye for an eye. He gives what he wants and expects that to be given back in its own way. He's more than happy with being popular and having Sam do so much, hell that helps boost his confidence. He's got his own demands and we've seen instances where he makes Sam supply hjm or give him his own food (which my friend has pointed out that Sam's willing to even starve for taurtis if it meant taurtis could feel full/get what he wanted.) We see Taurtis even being insecure when Sam and Grian point things out (like when he went bald and how horrible it looked) and he instantly jumped on trying to find ways to quickly grow his hair back. He doesn't want that imperfection. He's quick to jump to conclusions too because when Sam makes a small comment he INSTANTLY retorts. (Example; "you have a great chewwy/ you'd be a great chewwy-chewbaca" "are you saying I'm hairy/fat???) He's still an insecure teenager, despite his popular and having someone straight up need him to be even the slightest bit okay, I dont think he'd willingly abandon that
I have so much more to say but rn this is what I'm giving, I could go into his relationship with Sam, his acts/interests, hus family and childhood but that's for another episode
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mvltisstuff · 10 months
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Hello! ✨🤭 Here it continues to be July 23. So happy friendship day 🥺 maybe we are not very, very, very, very, very, very close friends. But your writings are a band-aid to my heart. Thank you for writing the two Next Step requests and the Skyfall one I sent. I think I'm asking for too many requests. Sorry 🙈
But thank you, thank you, thank you. Thank you very much. ✨
Well, could you make a request for Evan Buckley, please 🙈 with the song Genius by LSD ft. Sia.
Imagine like a second part of the previous Skyfall write up. Well this time the media and fans started to speculate about reader and Buck's relationship. This after the leak of some photos in which reader supposedly kissed outside the set to his co-star (not yet decided by the actor 🙈). And the rumors intensified the moment his co-star hinted at something off set. Reader is upset about it.
But then Buck is a ge-ge-ge-genius.
He had learned how the entertainment milieu works and how to protect his girlfriend and current fiancée. (it's just a thought) 🙈 🤭
Have a nice day and thank you very much 🤗✨
-Here little bell 🧚
genius (skyfall cont.) - e.b
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summary: request
evan buckley x reader
gif by @meep-meep-richie
a/n: your requests are beautiful like you, thank you again 🩷 also i hope you don’t mind that the actor is unnamed, i didn’t know who to put
the photos leaked day after the scene that y/n had to do. the whole picture was taken out of context, fans unknowingly posting that she was in public with another man. the movie was filmed in a small town in california, one that looked simple and calm before the paparazzi and camera crew set up.
y/n knows all the tricks of the media by now from being in the industry. she’s memorized every way people can twist a story or photo. especially since she revealed her relationship with buck at the oscar’s.
buck knew that she had to kiss other guys for work, but he didn’t diminish her for it. there was no need, he knew she loved him and no one else. the way she looked when he walked in or told her stories from work, he felt like a hero. he was, in her eyes.
when her co-star was brought on set, y/n was delighted. she loved his work, and was confident in their abilities to work together. they were great friends, going to lunch and introducing him to buck. there were more photos of them being released, so people assumed y/n was sneaking around. it didn’t sit right with her at all, because actors don’t get the same amount of scrutiny for that as actresses do.
y/n let it pass by, knowing that she and buck are the only important things now, and they know the truth. they don’t need people online to tell their fake business. she only started to squirm at the though when she noticed the star getting closer to her, and talking to her more. he flirted with her relentlessly, and y/n just tried to remove herself. after a pretentious day of filming, y/n drove back to her place where buck was waiting.
“hey!” he smiles when she walks in the front door. “how was your day?”
y/n places her stuff on the hooks and her purse on the table. she walks over to stand next to buck, who wraps his arms around her. “it was alright, a lot of stunts today.”
“something sounds off, did something happen?”
“no, it’s just…” she paused. she didn’t want to upset buck or worry him, but she wants to confide in someone about what she’s feeling. “he won’t stop hitting on me, and i wish he wouldn’t. i feel bad, but he knows i have a boyfriend.”
“do you want me to say something?”
“no, it’s fine. i can handle it,” y/n sighs, pulling herself away from buck. “we can order out tonight.”
bucks mind was filled with ideas about the acting community. how she has to watch her every move around people, and how viewers take information. he wanted to stop this guy from trying to hit it off with his girlfriend, but he didn’t want to cause anything. everyone knows everyone in los angeles, and it would surely get out if he made a huge deal of it.
buck had a plan instantly. the next day when he got to work, he requested bobby to borrow the truck with a few others. he tapped his fingers on his knee in excitement to see y/n at work, but also for her to see him again. he doesn’t usually boast, but it makes him feel really good. plus, she loves the uniform. he pulled into the parking lot with his near uniform and badges, adjusting himself and his hair as he walked in.
“we’ll have to test the cameras, and then-“ the director was speaking to her team before noticing buck and a few other firefighters around her. “can we help you?” she asks politely to the crew.
“we just got reports of a suspicious smell,” buck replies. “just want to make sure it’s not a gas leak or anything of the sort,” he looks around at the group of actors before spotting y/n who has a knowing smirk on her face. he barely manages to conceal his own instead of the gentle work smile.
“of course,” says the director. a few of the others move around. everyone knows buck, the guy dating y/n. but, he’s the man y/n loves, so when he walks over it’s clear on her face. he plants his hands on her arms, kissing her cheek and slightly glaring at her main actor.
“suspicious smell, huh? how creative,” y/n teases.
“i wanted to see you, and he’s lucky he didn’t get caught,” y/n laughs, looking him up and down in his uniform.
“you know i love seeing you in this,” she whispers raspy.
“don’t get too worked up, baby,” buck winks, making y/n’s eyes roll and push him away jokingly. “i have to get back, i’ll see you tonight?”
“you know it,” y/n tells him, watching him walk away with his gear and the slightly pale face of her costar from the stare buck gave him.
152 notes · View notes
b4b3tte · 9 months
Note
Hey, dear. Would you write something about Ken being in love with a curvy girl with low self-esteem? My idea sounds like she's in love with him too, but doesn't show it cause is afraid of rejection. So he would try to kinda "convince" her that he is really interested.
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꒰ ⊹ ˚ Summary — here is Ken confessing his love for the human girl he fell for
Contains of — Insecurities, bad mental health thoughts, confession, etc
Pairing — Gosling!Ken x Female Reader
note — UGH I LOVE when you guys request stuff, it makes me so happy thank you for the request I love it, it’s very unique than my other ones!! I hope you enjoy this and you and your body is gorgeous no matter what <3
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Ken had always been captivated by You, a curvy girl with a heart of gold. The radiant smile could light up a room, but he noticed something more profound beneath your cheerful exterior - a hidden layer of self-doubt that you carried like a heavy burden.
You as well, had secretly admired Ken from afar. His warm personality and the way he made everyone around him feel valued had won your heart, but fear held you back from revealing your true feelings. You couldn’t bear the thought of rejection, so you kept your emotions locked away.
It wasn’t something you did intentionally but something that just came naturally, you always feared of rejection and not being good enough for people, and knowing someone like ken
someone that’s handsome,charming, funny and bright, that made you question your worth and morals more than normal
You always heard of people talking about how Ken is head over heels for you but obviously you never took them seriously because why would you?
People are cruel these days and would do anything to make someone’s day bad, plus you simply thought you were worthy enough to be liked by someone especially someone like Ken
You couldn’t help these thoughts, so you just let them overpower you and become oblivious to kens flirting. Ken really adored you and wanted to impress you ten times more than he “ impressed “ Barbie,
it’s always “ hey y/n watch what I can do “ , “ y/n look at what I made “ , “ hey y/n want to go to the movies later tonight? “
Ken tried all of those things but he never managed to get a reaction out of you, he was genuinely wondering what was he doing wrong, he even started doubting himself but he finally decided he was gonna take this into his own hands
One gloomy afternoon, Ken decided it was time to make a move. He invited you to your favorite coffee shop, where you guys often shared stories and laughs. As you guys sipped their lattes, he mustered the courage to speak his truth.
“Y/n,” Ken began, “there’s something I’ve been wanting to tell you. I’ve admired you for a long time, not just for your beauty, but for the incredible person you are. I feel like you being here has brightened my life, you make me feel respected you put me first and I never thought that would happen. “
Your heart races at the shocking words ken just spoke, you really couldn’t believe he was saying those words to you, as you looked into his eyes, realizing that maybe, just maybe, he felt the same way you did.
Ken continued, “i know we have some things we don’t like of ourselves but I hope you know that I’m really interested in you, for who you are “
Ken always was confident but when it came to you he always choked up and got noticeably flustered, when it came to the part of speaking about your body he definitely hesitated but it just had to come out
“ Your curves are a part of what makes you uniquely beautiful, and I wouldn’t change a thing about you.”
You really wanted to tear up at kens heartfelt words you never had someone feel this way about you, hell you didn’t even feel like this about yourself, so to have someone to say this to you made you genuinely happy.You had never felt so cherished, so accepted for who you truly were.
Over time, Ken’s unwavering support and love helped you gain confidence in yourself . you began to see yourself through his eyes, not as someone with low self-esteem, but as a woman worthy of love and admiration.
Your love story blossomed, built on a foundation of trust, acceptance, and the courage to reveal your guys true feelings. Together, you two proved that love could conquer even the deepest insecurities, and you guys embraced your journey towards self-discovery and mutual adoration
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I Hope you guys enjoyed this, sorry for the rusty grammar and such, I wrote this during class lmao but I hope it’s still good!! Love you guys!! Please request more stuff❤️
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blueepink07 · 8 months
Text
Yuno and Ketsueki-gata
(character analysis, relationships and short vampire parallels)
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In the first voice drama, when Es asks Yuno some information about her, she starts telling many details, that, at first sight, seem to be a scene of amusement, to highlight Yuno's bubbly facade.
"Es: Milgram exists to reveal the crimes of you, prisoners, and to hand down the appropriate judgement. For that reason, talk to me for a bit.
Yuno: Okay! Let’s chat. Let’s chat!
Es: First—
Yuno: Firstly, I should introduce myself or something, right? Yuno Kashiki. Eighteen years old. I’m a high schooler. Born on the 2nd of September, I’m a Virgo. My blood type’s O."
Stating your name, age and current occupation, even the zodiac sign seem quite appropriate when somebody asks you to describe yourself. However, what stuck to me was the blood type. Why something that is used for medical purposes, it's so important that Yuno decided to say it when she talked about herself?
Well, in Japan, many people believe the blood type reveals your personality and relationship compatibility. This is known as Ketsueki-gata and, despite not being scientifically proven, it's used a lot in Japan!
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Blood type O - Yuno's personality
"Type O people have been linked to characteristics such as confidence, determination, resilience, and intuition, but they are also supposedly self-centered and unpredictable."
Although, Ketsueki-gata it's not really proven, I think it describes very well Yuno's personality!
Confidence - Yuno feels sure on herself and her thinking, as proven many times. When stating her opinion about Milgram to Es, she calmly explains her reasoning, linking with her dislike for people who judge their peers for not going with the flow, doing things different.
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People who intrude in other people's affairs generally do that, because they lack something, out of jealousy. Their low self-esteem needs to be fueled somehow and seeing individuals who have it better, provokes them into commenting and insulting, trying to make others feel bad as well.
Yuno, disliking these type of people, means that she is quietly proud of what she can do and achieve. If she lacks something, she will try to find it and have it (the warmth), without intruding in other people's business or displaying jealousy.
Determination - when Yuno realized that she is being perceived as an innocent and weak girl, it made her upset and disappointed. She never tried to convince Es that they shouldn’t consider her guilty, but when her personality was at stake, Yuno had to take action. Her second MV and VD explain very well her views about how she is considered to be, showcasing her determination to change our opinions.
"Yuno: That’s true. [stretch] Even if I was scorned by you, I would have been okay with being told I wasn’t forgiven. I don’t believe I’m not in the wrong. I’d accept it.
Es: …
Yuno: Despite that, you arbitrarily assumed things about me and sympathized with me. Even though all I did was make a rational decision of my own free will."
Teardrop:
"Caressing me with your “Good girl”
Who needs your self-righteous pardon?"
Resilience - "the capacity to withstand or to recover quickly from difficulties; toughness."
I think we don't give enough credit for how Yuno can keep to be so calm, considering the circumstances. Milgram is a magical prison with lots of weird stuff happening, the biggest concern being the unknown and the mysterious atmosphere this location has. Despite that, from the moment she arrived here, Yuno has never expressed her fears and concerns. She started to analyse every person in the facility, making assumptions of what might happen or what is currently happening.
If in the first trial, Yuno kept her bubbly facade, not only to get along with everyone, but also, because she felt genuinely happy being around them, in the second trial, her intentions has changed. She no longer finds Milgram a promising place to find warmth, trying her hardest to find solutions to escape from it, to go home.
Yuno observing the personalities of the other prisoners:
"Yuno: Hm? I won’t particularly change. Ah, I see, because Haruka changed a lot, right? Ah, men sure do change when they’re with women."
"Yuno: Really? If you ask me, Kotoko is someone I would never want to make my friend, though. She’s the type who picks a conclusion from the very beginning and won’t actually talk with you."
Yuno's assumption of her existence in Milgram prison:
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The fact that Yuno questions it, shows that she thought hard about her existence in prison.
Even thought she isn't given an answer, Yuno still manages to find a new information. The fact that Es doesn't know either.
Her response is actually very interesting...
"Hm... If you don't know, then It's fine."
Although, it would have been easier if Es answered her question, Yuno will continue to find information that might prove her assumption. This dialogue feels like Yuno is saying: "It's fine if you don't know, I will continue to search the answer anyway."
Currently, we don't know whether Yuno managed to improve her knowledge about Milgram prison, but I think in trial 3 she will be very interesting! She is a character that adapts very quickly and is capable to stay calm even in the most stressful situations!
Going back to the topic, since I mentioned Yuno's belief that she might not be alive and because we are talking about blood type personality, I think now it's the best time to introduce the vampire parallels! (then I will continue my character analysis!)
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"Vampire: a dead person who comes back to life and sucks blood from other people at night"
Yuno who thinks she's dead, came back to life in Milgram. When thinking about her question and her cover song, it really feels like she perceives herself as a vampire. Died and revived in prison, spent her life to find and feed on heat (a parallel for how vampires need blood to survive, while Yuno needs warmth) to warm her cold soul and body.
Her soul -> when she talks with the people she finds interesting/considers her friends; it makes her happy, basically gives her warmth in her heart. Yuno describes how she liked the atmosphere in prison at the beginning of the first trial:
"Yuno: Yes, it was fun! They may be murderers, but they’re interesting people! It puts me at ease, in a way, that we’re all people lacking in something."
Her body -> when she was embraced by the people she worked for, Yuno felt a temporary warmth that made her, for a short while, cheerful.
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Moreover, I think it's really interesting that Yuno is the only prisoner who asks for an extra blanket. Having no one to embrace her or hug her leads to Yuno asking for an item that might provide more warmth!
Is there anything you would like to request for?
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("Vampires in fiction are almost always colder than they were before they turned. This most likely originates from the fact that vampires are essentially living corpses, or it may be due to evil being cold.")
Also, Yuno gets more warmth at night, the same as how vampires are more active during that time of the day!
Intuition - Yuno uses it a lot during interactions, both in Milgram, but also in her compensated dating. For Yuno to understand quickly the person in front of her, she can't spend time using her logical thinking to analyse their personality. It would take too much time, and it wouldn't be very useful. Yuno senses the vibe that person gives and tries to match them in order to be of their liking.
How do you choose what casual clothes to wear?
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Intuition comes from learned experience. Yuno has a lot of knowledge when it comes to how people act and react, depending on the circumstances.
In Milgram, the biggest victim of Yuno's intuition is, funnily enough, Kazui! Every lie and reason behind it doesn't get unnoticed by Yuno!
(1)
"Yuno: Uh-huh, I see, I see…that’s a total lie, right?
Kazui: Haha…Give me a break here. You sure don’t make things easy for people, Kashiki-chan."
(2)
"Yuno: Haha, we both lie, don't we? The difference is the reason for lying. Kazui-san, you lie to protect yourself, because you're important to yourself. For me, no one is particularly important. That includes myself as well."
Self-centered - A person can be self-centered when it comes to work or a field, but the most generous person you have ever seen with the right people. Yuno is both caring and selfish. She cares about Mahiru and constantly helps Shidou into healing her. When it comes to Muu, though, she acts cold. In her birthday timeline post from last year, Yuno tells Muu to celebrate herself, not wanting to bother with her special day, despite being available during that time.
"Mu: Boo, how boring. You seem to be free, you can celebrate for me. Go on, celebrate.
Yuno: Wow, what a pain. I’m reading the atmosphere properly and keeping quiet. Well, you just go and have fun with Haruka. In the corner somewhere so you’re out of everyone’s way."
Moreover, during her VD, she tries her best to make us understand that the reason why she decided to participate in compensated dating is not because of a sad backstory, but for her own selfish needs.
And remember, self-centered is not always a bad trait! It can also mean to be independent and not care about the others' opinions, which, sometimes can be a good thing! Yuno doesn't care about what vote she has, because, at the end of day, it will not change her!
Unpredictable - Yuno, most of the time, is adjusting her personality based on who she is with! In the first VD, she is analysing Es and changes the way she speaks in order to be of their liking!
At first, she is childish and tries to play with Es, who she knows they are younger. When she realizes that Es is actually very mature for their age, Yuno starts to talk about more complicated topics, seeing that the prison guard will be more engaged into their discussion, if they are treated seriously.
Because of Yuno's habit to change her personality, she may come as unpredictable, being hard to read. In the second VD, she speaks with a playful voice for the most part. However, once she tells how the votes given by Es made everything worse and more complicated, she snaps.
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Leaving Es speechless...
Relationships
Going to the next section (finally), the relationship between people with blood type O and other blood types!
People of O blood type match well with those with A and B blood type (in most cases, of course!)
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Mahiru has blood type B and we know, based on the interactions, that Yuno and her are very good friends at the moment!
Also, Kazui, who has blood type A, is a good match when it comes to personality with Yuno. They both lie, the difference being the reason they are doing it.
However, something really interesting is how for two characters that share the same blood type A, Muu and Kotoko, Yuno expresses a particular dislike to them.
"Type O people are said to especially appear selfish to individuals with Type A blood."
Right now, we don't have information of how Kotoko perceives Yuno. However, we do know that Muu's dislike towards Yuno is mutual, as stated in the interrogation question. The fact that she started to act cold, for her, Yuno may appear more selfish, especially after what she said during her birthday.
Is there a prisoner you aren't fond of?
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Dating
Why have I brought up the relationships part? Simple! In Japan, Ketsueki-gata is used in order to find the compatibility of two partners at the early stages of dating!
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Considering that Yuno participated in compensated dating, she is very used to this kind of question! That’s why when she first presented herself to Es, Yuno told her blood type: out of habit and to show what kind of person she is!
Ending this with a short interpretation!
Type O can be transfused to any other blood type (A, B, AB). However, patients with blood type O can only receive blood transfusions from other people with blood type O. In a way, it feels like they help themselves, because they can't receive from any other blood type.
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I think this highlights Yuno's loneliness and lack of warm. She gives warmth to other people, cares for them (the clients, her friends, Mahiru), but doesn't feel like she receives back the amount of attention and consideration she needs. In Teardrop, the high school Yuno is taking care of cat Yuno, there is no one else beside her. She only has herself to protect her cold and lonely self...
I hope I managed to give a proper and interesting analysis for Yuno's blood type! Considering that this is the month when Halloween is celebrated, I wanted to make something for Yuno that might fit a little in the spooky vibe! Vampires and blood type felt like the best option!
Thank you for reading!
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dollybeagle · 2 months
Note
mothwing for the character opinion bingo?
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can you tell i like mothwing
ramble under the cut
FHNDAKS MOTHWING MY BEST FRIEND MOTHWING. I am the only one who's right about her ever /j. She's so important to me
Mothwing has been one my fav cats ever since I started reading the books, but I don't remember being so attached to her until last year. I recall it starting after (and also during, but mostly after) going through some nasty experiences related to toxic religious people and stuff that led into me having a complete religious meltdown. Mothwing was a character I could heavily relate to and project to during that time, and i became really attached to her oof
Mothwing is a really complex character in canon, with a lot of missed potential that I will never shut up about. So, she is the daughter of tigerstar, yet we never get any canon content of her even aknowledging that, at all? Which sucks because, unlike her siblings, she seems almost completely uneffected by the fact that tigerstar is her father.
Tigerstar is not the only character that Mothwing's relationship with had a lot of potential, but there are also other characters that could have been great to see intereacting with her. For example, something that really frustrates me is how we never get to see mothwing intereacting with her half-siblings (cough cough. tawnypelt.) especially at moments when there was a lot of potential. During tbc, we could have gotten some great scenes of Mothwing bonding with tawnypelt over their common origins that have left them unfairly wronged at multiple situations. Also, when they both found peace in shadowclan when their own clan screwed them over. Im pointing at you erins please im desperate
Another thing that I don't see people talk about is how much wasted potential there was between Feathertail and Mothwing's friendship. SHE SHOULD HAVE BEEN HER MENTOR BEFORE SHE DECIDED TO TRAIN AS A MEDICINE CAT.. PLEASE.
Anyway im done yelling at the erins so i will decide to be nice and not scream about how mothwing should have been a pov character during tnp because again. there was a lot of potential there but the erins are cowards. So let's get into canon mothwing. Canon Mothwing is sometimes hard to understand since we don't get any canon content with her during tnp, so we get to only see her from leafpaw/pool's point of view. When she's firstly introduced and throughout the whole series, Mothwing is often described by leafpool as beautiful, which I think has also influenced the fandom into portraying her as a "confident, pretty medicine cat etc etc". But I've always liked to interpret her as self conscious and awkward, literally anything but confident. I feel like sasha leaving riverclan, along with the reveal of the moth's wing sign and the reveal of her origins has left her pretty self conscious and awkward, if that makes sense.
I feel like I should share my opinion on mothpool, so here we go. I think i have mentioned before, that I'm not a big fan of fanon mothpool, mostly because the interpretation of both characters in this ship always felt a little odd to me (eg mothwing being a big buff fluffy personalityless gf and leafpool being the short, lithe, shy small gf. I just never really liked it). But I'm a big fan of canon mothpool, as well as messy mothpool. The one of them lives under rules they don't agree with, in a society that they see as "brainwashed and blind", while the other is a firm follower of these rules (leafpool fuck the code you should start killing), and while the two want to be together, they can do nothing but stare each other in longing. doomed yuri ftw
So, since we got these out of the way, let's talk about some design potential mothwing has. I'm a huge fan of colorpoint mothwing, but I can't help but notice that I'm growing fonder of tigerclone/brown rabby mothwing more. I feel like it would have been cool to see a tigerstar desceasand that also looks lik him trying to fix their reputation through their actions. Also, eye imagery mothwing design anyone?
also i believe she's an aroace lesbian.
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starrysky28 · 4 months
Text
The Times We Were Together: Chapter 2
Series Title: The Times We Were Together
Series Summary: After the Raccoon City incident, Claire, Sherry and Leon start living together, where they share many memories and moments with each other.
Chapter Title: "Closer To Normal"
Rating: T
Words: 2,664
Warnings: None, mentions of alcohol in the middle of the chapter
Much to the relief of everyone, the two hour car ride to Chris's house was a mostly smooth and easy one. Claire had insisted on driving over Leon, saying that he "drives too fast", to which the man in question had a few words denying this claim.
After nearly getting lost more than a few times due to Leon's shocking inability to read a road map, and a few "are we there yet's?" from Sherry in the back seat, the trio finally arrived. 
"You sure this is the place?", Leon asked.
Claire nodded confidently, "No doubt about it. I know my childhood home when I see it"
The house was a decent size, albeit a little big for just one or two people, which explained the fact that it was Chris and Claire's "childhood home". 
"Whoa! This place is amazing!", Sherry exclaimed in awe.
"You should see the inside!", Claire replied.
The excited child ran up to the door and knocked politely with zero hesitation.
"Wait for us, Sherry!", Claire laughed, grabbing Leon by the hand.
The young man was shocked by this gesture, his eyes fixated on her small, soft hands, only slightly calloused from the day before.
As Claire and Leon reached the front steps, the door opened, revealing a tall, burly man with short, dark brown hair and a serious, almost intimidating expression plastered onto his face. He also looked to be at least a few years older than Claire and Leon.
"Claire", The man nods.
There's now a sight softness in his expression, "I'm glad you're safe"
"It's good to see you again, Chris", Claire smiles fondly at her brother.
Chris clears his throat, now looking down at Claire's left hand, which still held Leon's right hand loosely.
A few seconds pass before Claire notices and lets go, "Oh! Um..."
"This is Sherry", She says, gesturing her hands towards the beaming girl in front of him.
"It's very nice to meet you, Sherry", Chris smiles, bending over to shake her hand.
"So...You're Claire's...?"
"Older brother? That would be me. I'm sure she told you all sorts of embarrassing stories already", Chris joked.
Sherry giggles, "Only a few..."
"Is that so, hm?", The man was now standing up straight, locking eyes with Leon.
"Who's the guy, Claire?"
Claire was slightly hesitant. Chris tended to be a little overprotective of Claire whenever there was a guy involved, at least that's what she'd learned from bringing home her old boyfriends from high school.
Leon, however, was just a friend.
"This is Leon. He was a big help to us yesterday", she said.
"Big help, huh?", Chris's eyes were still fixated on Leon, whose expression showed a slight tinge of panic, though he was trying hard to hide it.
There was an awkward silence before Chris spoke again, "Why don't you all come inside, it's a bit chilly out there" 
---------------------------------------------------------------------------
Walking into the house gave off the impression that the Redfield's seemed to be rather well-off financially, but also felt as if it were stuck in the 1980s, as most of the old furniture and belongings appeared to be intact from when their parents were still around.
"Make yourselves at home. The bedrooms are all set up for whenever you're ready to put your things away"
"Ooh! after we settle in, can you show me your old bedroom, Claire?", Sherry asked.
"Of course! C'mon, lets go put our stuff away", Claire replied, rushing up the stairs with the little girl behind her.
Chris laughed, "Look at those two, huh?"
Leon didn't realize he had been talking to him until he noticed him staring him down again, "U-Uh, yeah. Sherry follows her around like a baby chick. Cute, isn't it?"
Chris nods, "So, I have to ask..."
Leon gulped nervously.
"Are you and Claire together? Like a couple?"
"Ah- No, We're just friends, we only met a little over a day ago actually...", Leon blushed and itched at the back of his neck awkwardly, a habit of his for whenever he felt embarrassed.
"Oh...", Chris tried not to smirk. 
"I guess I was wrong then", he continued, turning in the direction towards the kitchen area.
"Can I get you something to drink, Leon?"
"Sure, what've you got?"
"I've got tons of stuff in here", Chris says peering into the refrigerator.
"Water, Soda...Alcohol...", he begins listing off items.
Leon thought he probably could have used an alcoholic drink after the events of yesterday, "What have you got for alcohol?"
...
Chris and Leon sat on the couch in the living room, a can of beer for each of them.
"I probably should have asked this beforehand, but you're old enough to drink right?", Chris asked, switching on the TV.
"Yeah. I turned twenty-one this year actually, why?"
"Just making sure. Don't take this the wrong way, but you've got a bit of a baby face"
Leon chuckled, taking a sip of the can, "I didn't think I looked that young"
The two then began to watch a few seconds of the bad sitcom that was on:
"Honey, there's someone at the door", a woman calls out
An uninterested man reading a newspaper answers, "Oh yeah, who is it?"
"A donation collector. Says he needs a donation for a community swimming pool"
"Give him a glass of water", he deadpans
A laugh track follows
"So, Claire tells me you're a cop too?", Leon speaks again.
Chris laughs, "She told you that? Sort of, not really though"
"I currently work for S.T.A.R.S, though I'm not really sure what's gonna happen now that Raccoon City is...well, you know. Me and the rest of the team were ordered to get out of there as soon as we could"
Leon sighs, "Yeah"
"But, uh, S.T.A.R.S, right? That's some pretty intense stuff"
"It can be, yes...but what about you? You said you were a cop, right?", Chris asked, changing the subject slightly.
"Yes...but only for a day...", Leon replies.
Chris nearly choked on his sip of beer, "Wait? You mean this was all on your first day?!"
"Yep"
"Man...I could never imagine"
The sound of quick footsteps rushed down the staircase and continued until reaching the living room area.
"Hey, guys", Claire smiled, slightly out of breath.
"I see you two have already bonded"
Chris smiled back at her, then looked back at Leon, "I suppose we have"
"Where's Sherry?", Leon noticed that she wasn't with her.
"Still upstairs", she answered.
"Who knew she'd be so fascinated with my old stuff. Makes me wonder if her parents ever let her even have those types of things..."
"I kinda doubt it", he added.
"So...", Claire sat herself down on the end of the couch opposite of the two men.
"What did you guys want to do for dinner tonight?"
"Oh, Is it that time, already?", Leon asked.
Chris looked over at the digital clock that sat below the TV, "It's about 5:30"
"I dunno about everyone else, but I'm pretty hungry", Claire said.
After Claire mentioned it, Leon realized that he too was a bit hungry, "Hmm, I guess I could eat"
"Why don't I check the fridge", Claire got up and made her way to the kitchen, which was connected to the living room.
However when she opened the fridge, she only shook her head, "Seriously, Chris?"
"What?", The man questioned.
"All you have in here is beer, soda, water, some cheese and an old apple"
"I'm sure all the starving children in the world would love to eat that, Claire", he joked.
Claire rolled her eyes playfully, "Okay, Mom"
"In all seriousness though, we can't make a single thing with any of this"
"Guess we have to order pizza then", Chris shrugged his shoulders.
She thought for a moment before promptly shutting the fridge, "Actually, that's not a bad idea"
"Give me one moment", she strutted briskly back towards the bottom of the stairs.
"Sherry!"
A faint "Yeah?" could be heard from upstairs.
"Come down for a sec, we're gonna order pizza!"
-----------------------------------------------------------------------
After ordering the pizza, the four of them sat on the couch in the living room, half-watching the TV show that was still on in the background and half-staring at the wall.
"So...what are we gonna do while we wait?", Sherry asked.
Claire made a face as if she were thinking, "We used to have some board games around here somewhere, though I think we moved most of them into the basement"
"I'll go look", Chris said, getting up from his seat and heading down into the basement.
...
A little over five minutes passed and Chris still wasn't back.
"Your basement can't be that big, right?", Leon joked.
Claire shrugged her shoulders, "It really isn't. I don't know what's taking him so long"
Finally, there was the sound of someone coming back up the wooden basement steps, which brought back everyone's attention.
"Find something?", she called out.
"Yes. Though its not a board game, it's a different kind of game" Chris answered.
The three of them peered over the wall that blocked off the view of the basement door. There was Chris, not holding a board game, but holding what looked to be some sort of device. 
"What's that?", Sherry asked.
"This", he began.
"Is a video game console"
"So cool! I've always wanted one of those!", she wowed.
"When did you get that?", Claire asked.
"Someone I used to know from the Air Force gave it to me a year or two back", he said.
"Never really used it, but I was given a game for it and a few controllers"
Chris pulled out a chunky cartridge that had been stuffed in his shirt pocket, revealing the game to be a popular mascot kart-racing game.
"Anyone here up for a few races?"
...
"What?! How did you manage to get into first already?!", Leon shrieked playfully.
Claire smirked, "I think you harshly underestimate my kart-driving skills"
"Alright, well...Take this!", he replied.
Because there were only two controllers, the four of them took turns playing against each other. While Leon and Claire were going all out against each other in a race, Chris and Sherry watched the drama unfold.
"I think Claire is definitely gonna win", Sherry predicted.
Chris somehow knew what was about to go down, "Hmm, I'm not so sure about that. Watch what's about to happen..."
The two of them watched on the screen as a spiky blue shell popped up over the head of Claire's character, who was about to cross the finish line, and quickly spun themselves out in mid-air.
"Ha! Gotcha!", Leon cheered.
"Hey! That's so unfair!", Claire watched as her character's place ranking dropped down all the way from first to fifth.
In the end, Leon's character ended up placing just one spot ahead of her, though he still won fair and square against her.
"Alright, you against Sherry, then I want a rematch on rainbow road", As soon as Claire said this, however, there was a knock at the front door.
"I think that's the pizza", Chris said, getting up from the couch.
"Ooh! I'll come too!", Sherry insisted, following him to the door.
Claire stood up in front of Leon and pointed a finger at him, "This isn't over yet!"
"Oh really? I'm almost positive I beat you that round", he laughed, raising an eyebrow.
She was sitting down next to him on the floor now.
"Don't be so cocky!", she teased, playfully shoving his shoulder.
Claire had shoved Leon harder than she meant to, knocking him over onto his back.
"Oops! Sorry. Here, let me help yo-", As she was getting up to help him, she tripped on one of the controllers still on the floor, falling directly on top of him.
"Hey, so I was thinking we could eat in here instead of-"
In the midst of this rather awkward moment, Chris and Sherry happened to walk into the living room with the pizza.
Chris stopped as he noticed the two frozen in place, staring at him, "Uhh, am I interrupting something?"
"Yeah, why are you guys on the ground?", Sherry asked with a tinge of innocent confusion in her voice.
Leon's blue eyes were widened with anxiety, "We-uh.."
"I tripped and fell, heh...", Claire chuckled awkwardly, though still telling the truth.
There was a long, very awkward silence before Chris replied, "...Okay"
"We're gonna go put these in the kitchen", he turned away, gesturing Sherry to follow him. 
------------------------------------------------------------------------
Dinner was long and awkward, which was unfortunate due to the fact that the group had been looking forward to having pizza that evening. Claire was the first to leave the table, stating that she "didn't feel well" and that she was "going upstairs for a bit".
Leon, on the other hand, who watched as she uncomfortably made her way up the stairs, worried that he had done something wrong. Perhaps he had teased her too much? That wouldn't have been likely, Claire seemed to be the type to have thick skin, or at least she had proven herself to be that way.
Without saying a word, he abruptly left the table not even a minute later. 
"Leon? Where are you going?", Sherry questioned him.
"Upstairs. I'll be right back", he replied bluntly.
"Why is everyone so upset?", Sherry piped up softly once the man was out of earshot.
"Nobody's upset", Chris reassured her.
"I assume Claire and Leon just have some things to sort out"
"Like what?", she asked.
Chris shook his head and smiled at her, "Don't worry about it"
...
Claire sat silently on her bed, glancing around the room at her old posters and pictures from when she was younger. However, the thoughts in her mind couldn't be any louder. 
She couldn't seem to stop thinking about Leon and how she felt about him. She wished the thoughts would go away, but every time he looked at her, smiled, laughed, or even spoke to her, they only kept coming back.
The thoughts couldn't help but make her feel like some lovesick teenager. Sure she'd had a few guys she liked back in school, but something about this felt different. It couldn't be a crush though, could it? No, no matter what, Leon and her could only be friends. Besides, a guy with his looks probably wasn't single either, right?
All of this made Claire's head spin and her stomach tie itself in knots.
Suddenly, a gentle knock on her door startled her out of her thoughts.
"Who is it?", she called out.
"It's me, Leon. I just wanted to make sure you were alright", his voice was muffled by the closed door.
"I'm fine. You can come in if you want"
The wooden door opened with a creak.
"Hey...You okay?", he asked gently, walking into her room.
"Yeah, I'm alright"
"I think I just had too much pizza", she lied.
He sat on the bed next to her and exhaled through his nose, "If this is about earlier, I'm really sorry"
"No, I'm sorry. I'm the one who landed on top of you after all", she laughed.
"It's fine, really. Even if it um, lead to some misunderstandings, I don't mind", he replied, clearing his throat.
"Right", she sighed out of relief.
The two stared into each other's eyes for a few seconds, Leon starting to unconsciously move his hand toward Claire's slowly.
"Hey, guys!", Sherry called from downstairs.
"Yeah?", they both answered in unison.
"We're gonna watch a movie if you wanna join!"
"Why don't we go back downstairs", Leon said, gesturing his head toward the now-open door.
Claire nodded, "Sure. Lets go"
As the three of them settled well into Chris's house that evening, the thoughts of Raccoon City didn't seem to be the only things still fresh in their minds, but at least things were now closer to normal than they had been before.
To Be Continued...
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bippot · 1 year
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Summary: The Vigilante mobile breaks down and Adrian needs a hand, transport-wise and socially it seems. Once his coworker gives him a hand, it sets him off and there is no going back to the platonic relationship they had before.
A relationship that needs to have clear boundaries because Adrian is known to get far too excited to interact with her at any chance he gets.
Additional Tags: Co-workers, Brief Homophobia, Codependency, Fluff, Drunkenness, Developing Relationship, Eventual Smut, Shower Sex, Male simp
Song Recommendation: Addicted by Saving Abel
Peacemaker, Adrian Chase Masterlist - here
└─────── ⋆⋅☆⋅⋆ ───────┘
One job tends to be enough for one person. Yet, some people have to do more than that. Single mothers. College students. Crime fighters. And Adrian Chase fits into that last category.
Fennel Fields could've merely been a cover. The life insurance payments of his parents and brother were more than enough to live on for a regular person, yet Adrian liked guns. And guns can be expensive. Not to mention, his prescription visor had to be custom built and, even then, he added a few dollars extra for their secrecy. His secret identity being revealled by the guy who makes his fucking fancy glasses was the lamest unmasking he could think of. That would suck so hard.
And then the 11th Street Kids became his third job - sort of. It was like his night time patrol but in the day. It wasn't quite another job, just it amplified his favourite one. It was like 2.5 jobs. Which was cool. Tiring as shit, but dope as hell.
Another super awesome thing about A.R.G.U.S. was that he got to work with his best buddies. His coworkers at Fennel tended to not understand his humour or they thought he was weird or crazy, and just generally were not nice to him. There was no Chris. No Eagly. And definitely no Y/N. He'd fucking know if there was a babe as hot as Y/N at godamned Fennel Fields.
Y/N was a total badass when it came down to it. She was confident and smart and she knew how to take charge of situations and make a plan B before plan A had yet to fail. Plus she wasn't a closed off asshole like Harcourt, Adrian thought. She made jokes, she laughed, and she was always willing to give him a helping hand whether it was on the battlefield or off.
Kindness seemed to be rare these days.
So, there was no doubt what her response was when the Vigilante mobile broke down and he needed a ride. Nowhere in his mind did he think to ask Chris because why, why would he? Y/N would say yes with no hesitation. Chris would bitch and whine, then ultimately forget to give him the ride.
"Get in, sweetheart," she called out through her window as soon as she saw him walking towards her car. Her voice was warm, kind and friendly as ever. As always. Adrian grinned widely as he climbed into the passenger seat and threw down his backpack, causing some of it to spill out into the footwell. "Nice outfit."
Looking down at his stupid busboy uniform, he let out a quick and defensive, "I have nicer clothes than this. You know I do." It was stupid. The words came out a mile a minute. Like he was an over excited puppy that was trying to impress a new friend. "Got a bunch of nice clothes, you see. In my room. That I wear. Sometimes."
He got like this on occasion. If they hadn't seen each other in a couple of days, he would be talking nonstop in such a cute, ramble-ish manner that she couldn't help being totally entertained by it. Often, she'd see people completely shut him down whenever he started talking so she let him say whatever he wanted to. He was a funny guy. Just... a little bit overexcitable sometimes. She wasn't bothered by it, though.
"Yeah, your Vigilante get up is so nice and cool."
"You think?" He chirped happily as he tried to stuff everything that had fallen out of his bag back in whilst his focus was entirely on her. This conversation was going much better than planned, if Adrian was honest with himself.
Sure, he looked kinda dumb in that hat that Fennel forced him to wear, but that didn't matter. Especially when she reached across the gearstick and straightened the hat on his head to adjust it properly. Y/N's hands lingered there for a moment longer than they should've. She was brushing the curls against his forehead, which he found very comforting. He felt all tingly inside.
But then her fingers retracted and she pulled away, leaving Adrian feeling like he'd been kicked in the stomach. He'd hoped she'd stayed or maybe gone further. Who knows, one day he might get super lucky and she will take his face into her hands. Maybe give him a little smooch, maybe more. Hopefully more than a little smooch.
God, he hoped so much. So much that it felt almost painful sometimes. His heart fluttered every time he thought of her - and, oh boy, he thought of her quite a lot.
"Yeah, the visor is genius really. Putting your prescription in the mask so you don't have to wear your glasses underneath, that's creative problem solving, dude," she cheered as she started the car and pulled away from his drive.
"Never been called a genius before," Adrian muttered, mostly to himself. He liked hearing compliments from Y/N. They felt special. She always said the absolute nicest things about him, and he cherished them deeply, well, mostly because he rarely got them. He was used to people being mean or condescending to him since that was expected, after all.
And his mother always tried to get him to pay back a compliment when he was given one. It was a lesson that rarely came up, but he was immediately prepared with aspects of her that he liked. There was a litany of things about her that he liked - her intelligence, her bravery, her honesty, her kindness, her humour, her fucking face, not to mention her rocking bod! - and, if anything, he had a hard time picking between them.
"Your boobs look nice today."
Shit. Oh. Fuck. Not that one. Should not have said that.
A blush began to rise onto his cheeks as he stared forward in embarrassment. Yet, he heard Y/N snort in response. "Oh. Thank you!" She giggled without an ounce of disgust or malice, just pure amusement.
"That was awful, I'm sorry." Adrian groaned and let his face fall into his hands, but soon gestured in the general direction of her cleavage. "Your top is low cut and I'm a man. A warm blooded man. My brain was not ready for that."
Again, she laughed, her voice filling the car with revelry and joy as the wind blew her hair around. Adrian's body relaxed slightly and a small smile came upon his lips as he allowed himself to glance up at her profile and watch as she drove.
"Hey, a cute guy looking at my boobs is a okay with me," she said playfully. And he couldn't tell if it was a joke or sarcasm or something, but she definitely didn't mean it that way. She couldn't. That was impossible. She had to be joking.
Right?
She had the sense to change the subject as he seemed to quieten down, so she assumed he was uncomfortable in some way. Or maybe he was just embarrassed about his compliment.
"What time do I need to pick you up later?"
"Nine," he replied quietly. Then, he cleared his throat and continued, "I could always walk if you want an early night or don't want to drive or something like that."
"Nonsense." Y/N waved it off and gave him a grin that told him that whatever self deprecating things he was thinking, he should throw out the window for good measure.
Before they knew it, they were in the Fennel Fields car park. The conversation had been a smidge stilted as he was attempting to think before he spoke, which was a seriously underdeveloped skill of his. He didn't want to fuck up royally and make her hate him. That would suck. That would really suck.
Here she is, the perfect girl who, for reasons that he had no clue about, was nice and sweet to him - yeah, he didn't want to fuck that up. He didn't want it to all come crashing down because of a few stupid thoughtless comments.
"See you later...Bye Y/N!"
Then he was out of the car as fast as he could without tripping over his own feet. He hadn't gotten a chance to scope out his surroundings and, therefore, failed to notice that both Fred and Colin were on their break. These guys were assholes, he knew that for sure as his high school years had been made hell by those two douchebags.
"Woah, look at him go," Fred scoffed as he crossed his arms over his chest and leaned lazily back against the wall. "Fastest gay in the galaxy!"
Adrian stopped in place.
"Guys, how many times have I told you that using the word gay as an insult isn't, like, cool or good. It's offensive to gay people."
Colin had to take the opportunity to tease, "Shit, I think we offended him. Sorry, homo."
"Yeah, sorry bum boy."
Honeslty, these guys had been saying shit like this since high school and it was, not only incredibly childish and homophobic, but so fucking boring. They could've at least kept their insults interesting. Once a teenage girl on the street yelled at him "Bitch, you look like you work at the sperm bank and get paid in exposure," and he thought about it for days on end. It was totally out of pocket, unprompted and, shit, he made sure never to wear that one cardigan ever again.
In fact, he burned it.
"Wish I never told you guys that I'm bi," Adrian sighed tiredly as he ran a hand through his hair in frustration.
From where she was sitting, Y/N could just about hear the conversation and felt awful for him. When he spilled his bag, he'd missed an item. Perfect.
Calling out as she stepped from the car, "Hey sweetheart, you left your..." What the fuck was this in her hand? It was a weird shaped dice. It was more circular than the die she was used to. "This thing!"
A woman, and a pretty one at that, was actually interacting with him in front of his coworkers. That was great. So awesome because then he could claim that Y/N was his girlfriend and all the weird comments would stop. How could he be even a smidgeon bit gay if he had a girlfriend? In their shallow little minds, it was impossible. That was his mission.
"Thanks, b-babe." Adrian sounded so unconvincing as he said it that she rolled her eyes fondly and walked towards him with an amused grin on her lips. "I'll uhmm....Put it away."
As soon as she was beside him, she wrapped her arms around his shoulders and he thought he was imagining shit, but then he saw her lips coming in closer and closer and, holy crap, was she actually going to kiss him? Yes, yes she was.
He didn't care if it was a dream because he could feel her soft mouth pressing against his and he kissed her back without hesitation. It felt real, and he could feel her smiling through the kiss. She felt real too, the smooth skin against his hands as he cradled her cheeks seemed to be real too. But, most importantly, she tasted real.
And, boy, did she taste so good. He wanted more, so much more than as she went to pull away, he chased her lips to prolong it as long as he could. They eventually parted as he rested his forehead against hers and breathed heavily.
"You okay?" she whispered.
"Never fucking better."
Detaching herself from his grip - before he wanted her to if he was being honest - she pretended to notice the other men with a faux apologetic, "Oh sorry, couldn't help myself - he's too cute to resist," then turned back to Adrian, "See you tonight?"
"Yeah, yeah...of course. S-see you."
His little dumbfounded heart was racing as he watched her head back into the car, knowing that he was probably blushing a deep red. And that it wasn't only because he just kissed a girl he admired - a girl whose beauty was far superior to any other human's - but also because she'd (whether directly or indirectly, he had no idea) helped him out. It felt nice, actually. Weird and a tad embarrassing, but still nice. Real nice.
"You and her?!?" Both Fred and Colin exclaimed simultaneously as soon as Y/N disappeared into her car.
The so so smug feelings inside Adrian were written all over his face as he attempted to shrug nonchalantly and head inside without replying. He was practically bouncing with each step as he entered the restaurant and tried to act as though nothing happened, that it was a regular occurrence.
Even his boss made a passing remark about how chipper Adrian seemed. The usual work philosophy for just about every member of the Fennel Fields staff was to provide only as much as they needed to. A smile on the way in and if they were taking an order, yet Adrian had a Cheshire grin for the entirety of his shift, which actually was rather distressing to some customers.
Of course they had to be polite but not necessarily kind and he found himself going out of his way to please everyone around him. The second he noticed a customer's water getting empty, he was there in a flash to refill it whether they wanted him to or not, usual information about when the kitchen was thoroughly cleaned last (way too long ago) was given without being prompted, just as which meals he'd recommend (the cheapest) was too. And he was humming a little song to himself the entire time.
After all, he was in love. A love that had been there for a while just lurking under the surface and had finally broken through the barrier to become even more glaringly obvious. It was annoying to everyone else, but at least Y/N kissed him so he didn't really care. And, he desperately needed to experience it again.
Once nine arrived, he was absolutely buzzing to leave and, as she said she would, Y/N was parked outside. She'd gotten out to throw some of her rubbish in the trash can and was suddenly attacked from behind.
In an instant, her years of training kicked in and she brought her elbow back to wind whoever had grabbed her in the stomach. Then, to grapple them instead, she turned and managed to catch their arm to twist it against their back, retaining them tightly enough to keep them from running.
Not that he was going to run. No way. Adrian was way too turned on to even try.
"Hi Y/N," he beamed.
"Oh Ade! I'm so sorry - you surprised me there." She let go of the hold and helped him stand upright again. "You good?"
So good. Literally the best he'd ever felt, which was why he confidently grabbed onto her hips and tugged her towards him, their lips meeting in an abrupt and needy way that would've had her stumbling backwards if his grip wasn't so strong.
How surprised she currently was feeling was completely overshadowed by how unbelievably wonderful his kiss felt. His lips, they were so soft and warm, and they fit together perfectly. The way he kissed her was so natural and as if he had been preparing for this moment for ages. It was intoxicating.
His tongue traced across her bottom lip, prompting her to open her mouth and welcome him, which she was more than happy to do. He felt her hand travel up to his cheek, her thumb gently stroking his skin as they pulled apart for air, her breathing heavy and quick, her face flushed.
"Hi," she whispered coyly, her voice softer and sweeter than he'd ever heard before.
"Hey."
"What was that?"
"Dunno...just, uh, just felt like it," he shrugged nonchalantly, still holding her waist in his grasp in a clumsy yet possessive grapple. A giggle escaped her throat as he turned his head to press his lips to her palm and nuzzle it affectionately. "Can we hang out tonight? Like, just us?"
Waiting for her response, his gaze met hers once more, his green eyes staring down at her in adoration as she tried to piece things together. If possible, his face grew even more adorably charming as she stared back at him. Her expression softened.
"Yeah, of course. Whatever you want to do, Ade." Her voice, although still husky and full of confusion, held such a gentle, caring tone that he melted at the sound.
With another kiss to her palm, he released her and they headed to the car and drove off together. The entire time she was sneaking glances at him, because was this an alien? He seemed excited, yes, but Adrian hardly ever liked being touched by anyone and, here he was, reaching for her hand every time she took it off the gear stick.
It was a nice change, sure. But a weird one. She assumed it had something to do with their kiss before work. And she knew for a fact that he was touch starved. It had to be a mix of the two. Why else would he have acted so differently? It had to. It was weird, definitely, but a good weird.
Still, she felt the need to check, "Are you doing okay? You haven't taken any drugs or been concussed or replaced by a clone?"
"Uh, none of the above. I'm seriously a-okay," he replied, chuckling at how preposterous she sounded. He was dead against drugs so that's a no go. At no point had he signed up for a shady scientific experiment so the chance that there were other Adrian Chase's running about was slim.
Plus, his shift had been rather uninteresting, unless she counted the fact that "I scraped my finger a little and it hurts a bit, but other than that, I'm fucking peachy."
Despite the fact he claimed he was fine, Y/N did a series of medical tests as soon as she got him through the door of his apartment. "Look straight into my eyes please," she ordered and he obliged immediately.
Then he did try to lean forward and kiss her again. Yet, she put her hand on his chest to prevent him from doing so. She took his chin in her hand and tilted him from side to side to inspect every part of his face.
"You have really nice eyes, Y/N. Really pretty," Adrian complimented, his hand resting on the small of her back, gently rubbing up and down as she worked, and his legs swinging either side of her hips as he sat on the kitchen counter.
She nodded absentmindedly, her eyes still glued on his face. His pupils were dilated, yet still seemed to react appropriately when she shone a torch at his eyes. There were bags underneath them, which meant that he hadn't slept very well recently but he rarely got a good amount of sleep so that wasn't out of the ordinary.
"No drugs?"
"NoPe."
"Are you on any new medication?"
"No."
"And you haven't sustained any head injuries in the past two days?"
"None whatsoever, no."
"Got a headache?"
So many questions. So many damn questions. They all had the same answer. And, frankly, he was getting a bit bored of answering so he gave her the best puppy dog eyes he could manage.
"Okay, okay, I'll stop with the torch," she relented, giving him a pat on the cheek. "But, answer me one more question. What's with all the touching? I don't mind, but it's different to how you usually are and I, I don't know, is this a good thing or...?"
Adrian didn't reply right away. His hands slowly fell back down to his sides as he looked down at his shoes awkwardly, his fingers fidgeting with his sleeves. The look on his face didn't match what was happening inside of him right now. One second he was looking into her eyes lovingly and the next second he couldn't help but feel annoyed with himself.
"I like it... And earlier, I- When you... I had to feel it again. I had to feel you again. Maybe I got a bit excited." His voice was almost timid and quiet as he lifted his head.
For the first time in her life, she saw as he seemed to be slightly vulnerable and unsure of his own words. He didn't dare make eye contact with her, but she could tell he wanted to so badly as he added, "Do you, uh, did you like it?"
Tilting his chin up, Y/N smiled gently and brushed some hair behind his ear as she replied, "I'm a big fan of that kiss outside your work and -"
Cheekily, he said, "Which one?" and immediately cheered himself up as soon as he heard her laugh at his remark. However, he couldn't revel in the sound for long as his train of thought was stopped by the obvious sounds of his front door opening.
Without thinking, Adrian jumped down and grabbed a knife from the rack to be armed if the intruder became violent. Which was unlikely because the intruder was in fact Chris. A very drunk, topless Christopher Smith threw the spare key that Adrian gave him at his friend's head with a loud, "Beer! Fucking love beer! Give me some more!... Holy shit, Y/N? Is that you?!"
"Sure is, doofus."
"But this is Adrian's house?"
Sheathing his weapon now that he knew it was only Peacemaker, Adrian made his way over to Chris and placed his hand in front of him with three digits up. "How many fingers, dude?"
Chris gave him a high five.
"Good job, man."
Whatever newfound romantic tone the two had built was quickly placed on the back burner for a moment so they could deal with Chris. Judging by how Adrian dealt with his friend, the pair had clearly gone through this before.
Turning to Y/N, who was standing with her arms crossed over her chest and an amused grin covering the whole of her face, Chris sluggishly asked her, "Why are you here? Did he finally do something?" Then turning to Adrian, he grinned and mumbled, "...Did you, you know, all that mushy shit that I told you not to do?"
"Let's get you to bed."
"Yo, you're not trying to fuck me, are you?"
"No dude."
"Good, cause I like my men less fucking dweeby."
Peacemaker was promptly guided towards the only bedroom and left to pass out on Adrian's bed before he could say anything else. There was a little resistance and that would turn into a deep purple bruise on his buddy's ribs by the morning, but all things considered, it had been one of the easier drunken nights.
After tucking Chris in and pulling the blanket over him, Adrian returned to Y/N and leaned back against the wall opposite where she was propped against the counter.
"That went better than expected," he remarked playfully while crossing his arms across his chest and watching as her eyes glittered with amusement, a soft smile tugging at the corners of her mouth.
"If it makes you feel any better, I like my men dweeby. So fucking dweeby."
He pushed off the wall to saunter towards her and cage her body between him and the counter, claiming, "I'm the king of dweebs so you must be really into me," as he looked down at her.
"Well..." She bit her bottom lip, pretending to think about it. "Guess I must be."
His smile widened, a wide, toothy grin that lit up his features and made him look incredibly goofy and cute. It brought out that same sparkle in her eyes and made her heart skip a beat just looking at him, which only got worse when he gently nudged his nose against hers.
They'd been friends for a while now and while she had been flirting with him since they met, she never expected him to be so tactile with her. So open. So honest. It took her completely by surprise. He never showed his feelings openly, mostly because he had the tendency to believe that he didn't have any.
Clearly, he did.
It was like a dam breaking apart. And just like a wall of water coming straight for your face, she got overwhelmed by the sheer volume of his affection.
If she was in the same room as him, he'd be attached to her hip. He had to be touching her in some way. If they were apart, he'd be texting her as frequently as he could possibly manage to do so. And if she'd been busy and missed a few texts, her phone would be bombarded with calls.
Adrian Chase was one needy bastard. His behaviour had shifted so dramatically towards her. It was as if a switch had been flipped in his mind, all those years of loneliness suddenly being thrown out the window as he began clinging desperately onto her whenever and wherever possible.
In most ways, it was sweet. Knowing that he liked being around her was wonderful. She felt loved. Needed. Cared for. Protected. But there was a downside. It was constant. Constant neediness. Constant longing for closeness. Constant wanting. Constant desire for every single bit of her attention.
Every word she'd say. Every movement she'd make. Every action she'd take. Everything she did. Everything she thought. Everything she felt. All of it had a spectator watching it unfold.
"Ade, can I-"
Before she was able to finish her sentence, she was interrupted by a pair of lips crashing against hers. She sighed softly as his hand moved to cup her cheek, thumb caressing along her jawline. He kissed her slowly and gently, making sure that she knew he wasn't going anywhere anytime soon.
Once he released her and took a second to get her fuzzy mind back on track, Y/N broke free from his hold and reached forward to push at his chest so he would let her pass into the bathroom.
"Don't follow me in here," she warned sternly. "Just hang out, out there. Go pick a movie or some shit."
As much as he tried to protest, she wouldn't hear of it and practically pushed him out into the hall. She locked the door behind her and let out a deep breath as she rested her back against the wood. The whole situation made her dizzy. She loved hanging out with him, it was great - so much fun - but not every second of their time together had to be like this.
Their relationship definitely wouldn't last long if it continued in this manner. She would reach a boiling point eventually and she didn't even want to imagine what would happen after that.
So, some boundaries had to be placed.
Y/N sat on the toilet and worked it all out in her head. In order to prevent future problems, she needed to break this routine. She needed to lessen this clingy behaviour that was slowly eating away at her, and it wasn't sustainable for him either. There would be a point where he'd get bored of being emotionally dependent on her and then there'd be no going back.
There was a brief moment where she was doubting herself then her phone vibrated and she didn't even need to look at it to know who had texted her.
"Hey baby, can we talk?" she asked as she walked into the living room to find him patiently waiting for her.
"Yeah, you know I love the sound of your voice."
Walking over to sit next to him on the sofa, she turned her body so that she was facing him and reached her hand out to run through his curls. "Be warned, I'm serious about everything I'm about to tell you."
A nervous smirk appeared on his face and he fiddled nervously with a stray thread on his sweater, avoiding her eyes.
"You're breaking up with me, aren't you?" he whispered, causing her eyes to widen considerably.
"No! No, no, no! Of course not!" she reassured, shaking her head vigorously, "Oh God no, nothing like that. This isn't..." She paused and waited for him to look up at her. When he did, she continued. "I really like you, Adrian, but -"
"I really like you too!"
The words caught her off guard, but she smiled nonetheless. He had a tendency to interrupt her, but she knew it was because he was so excited to tell her something and couldn't stop himself from blurting it out.
"I know you do, baby." He stared up at her intently and gave her a big smile and a nod, which prompted her to carry on. She inhaled sharply, feeling slightly apprehensive at how he reacted to her confession, "What I mean to say is that...I like being around you, but I do need some time to myself sometimes too. We don't have to always spend all of our time together."
"Do you mean like...alone time?" he questioned, cocking his eyebrow upwards. "Like, alone time without me?"
"Yes."
Her answer seemed to have given him more pause than what she'd intended since he frowned and tilted his head, something clearly swimming around in that head of his. He remained silent, his gaze wandering off somewhere behind her.
After what felt like forever, he softly said, "Okay."
She blinked, completely surprised by his nonchalant reaction. She'd half expected him to whine a lot more, to complain and pout about it. But he hadn't. Not once did he utter a word about it or try to convince her otherwise.
"Do you understand why?" she pressed, reaching a hand out to squeeze the palm of his hand reassuringly.
Another pregnant silence filled the room until he finally replied, "Not exactly."
He looked up at her again, and the way he was staring at her was almost like he wanted to memorise her face, trying to imprint it in his brain for the sake of any memory loss later when she would abruptly not be right next to him.
"You know how you don't like it when Economos taps his pen against the table? It's fine at first but then he carries on and on until it becomes a little overwhelming, then you have to go into the other room for a break?"
"Yeah, John pisses me off all the time." He paused and came to a realisation. "I piss you off?!? Oh my God, baby, I'm sorry. Are you mad? I won't ever do that again, I promise," he babbled and quickly started to panic, "You are, right? You're angry with me. You hate me! Oh my God. Y/N, please forgive me. Please, I don't mean to. I'm sorry, please don't leave me. I'll do anything, I swear I will."
Then he looked at her with such genuine fear, and it hit her hard. This man was absolutely terrified of losing her, so afraid that he'd lose one of best friends and she would disappear from his life, leaving him all alone in the world. He was a mess. A broken shell. He'd spent a lot of his life alone, and he had been utterly miserable for most of it.
Coming to think of it, these past few months, he'd been happier than she'd ever seen him before. More comfortable with himself. He genuinely smiled more often. He wasn't as purposely reckless. Chris didn't seem to affect him as much. And most astonishingly, he slept better.
"Hey, hey, shush, it's okay," she cooed as she lifted his chin up with her finger. "Look at me. Look at me, I promise I'm not going anywhere, okay? Don't worry. I'm not mad at you. It's not that at all. I just wanted some space, some temporary space, that's all. Periodic breaks of alone time."
"Just temporary?" he asked hopefully, eyes wide as saucers. "Promise?"
"I promise."
Relief washed over his features, the worry and anxiety melting away like snowflakes under the sun. His shoulders sagged and he slumped forward until he was resting his head against her lap. He sighed contentedly, "Thank fuck."
She chuckled and scratched gently at his scalp, feeling like she'd lost a huge weight off her chest. Now that they were somewhat on the same page, she could relax. They would still have many things to work through. Many things to figure out, but she knew for certain that they were on the right path to moving forward.
They took the time to have a big long conversation about everything. In the end, it went pretty well and Y/N knew, she knew that they'd be fine. Yet, they had to test it out before they got too far ahead of themselves.
"What are the rules?"
"No texting or calling for two hours unless there's an emergency."
"And?"
"Keep my hands off your butt when I see you at work."
"And number 3?"
"Ask before I try to initiate any PDA."
Y/N was so glad he had taken her boundaries seriously and wasn't letting it slide. It was sweet of him and honestly, she was touched by his effort to respect her wishes. He was trying, and he was trying so hard. For that, she was grateful beyond measure.
"Can I give you a goodbye kiss?" he asked tentatively, his voice soft and low.
"Baby, you don't have to ask when we're at home. PDA, as in, public displays of affection."
Her arms wrapped around his shoulders and she pulled him closer into her embrace, pressing a gentle kiss onto his cheek. Then the other cheek. Then finally to his lips for good measure.
"It was very kind of you to ask though."
When she pulled away, he was smiling like crazy at her, the smile he never allowed anyone to see and the sight caused her heart to melt like butter. That smile belonged solely to her and her alone. It had become so addictive and she would be lying if she didn't admit that everytime they made a connection, she would feel giddy inside.
And as she went to lean back in to give him another smooch, he gently pushed her face away with a smug, "I thought you had to go?"
"I do."
"So go."
Smiling up at him, she grabbed the front of his tshirt, dragging him down towards her and connecting their lips in a chaste yet heated kiss before leaving his apartment.
Two hours of freedom and how did she spend the majority of it? Sitting by herself in a cafe and wondering if he was okay, that's how. She had intended to read a book, but would get distracted and couldn't make it past the first four paragraphs. She kept checking her phone. Maybe it was muscle memory. Maybe it was that nagging part of her brain that said 'he hasn't texted in five minutes, he could be dead.'
Realistically, she knew he was fine. Vigilante is not the easiest of targets. She knew that. So logically, he'd probably be perfectly okay. And he was. As soon as they made it to HQ, she could see that not only was he physically fine - in every way - but he seemed emotionally fine too.
"For the first time ever, your boyfriend beat you here," Adebayo quipped as Y/N walked through the door, half drunk smoothie in her hand. Leota gestured to Adrian who was looking over Economos's shoulder at some new weapon that John had come up with - the Eagly-copter, which was a drone sort of thing that resembled a very familiar eagle and was equipped with cameras and an uzi.
Modern technology, ay?
He saw her out of the corner of his eye and shot her an amused grin and a wink, raising his eyebrows suggestively before returning his attention back to the fake bird and John's big lecture about how neither of the superheroes could play with it in any way.
The moment it was over, however, Adrian beelined towards his girlfriend. "Did you miss me?" he mused as he leant against her desk, picked up her drink and took a sip. She was going to offer it to him anyway.
"I did," she confirmed with a laugh. "Kiss please?"
Adrian hummed, leaning in to give her a quick kiss that was far less gross than their colleagues were used to seeing them share. Even Harcourt commented, "I'm grossed out, just not as much as normal."
"How are you? Did you find it okay?" Y/N questioned, watching as he slowly drank the rest of her smoothie. Adrian shrugged, looking thoughtful as he stared deep into the liquid and swirled the straw around in circles.
"I think so," he eventually answered after giving himself time to mull things over in his mind. "I did freak out for a bit then, yeah, played some Stardew Valley and that distracted me... I understand now. Sorry for being so clingy before."
"You're forgiven, babe," Y/N assured him with a small nod.
"One more kiss before we get on with our work?"
Y/N rolled her eyes good naturedly, placing a firm kiss on his mouth and making sure to linger there, savouring the taste of his lips and the slight roughness of his stubble before pulling away.
"Those documents aren't going to read themselves. Get on with it, baby!" he jeered as he moved to his seat to do whatever Harcourt had planned for him.
Over time, their alone time could get longer and longer. It came to the point where they could go an entire day without seeing each other. Obviously, there was a splattering of texts during that day that were mostly memes or good morning/night messages or whenever he got bored on his shift and needed some lighthearted entertainment.
Then came her mission. Waller had hand picked five of her agents and, alas, Y/, was one of them. It was the biggest quest of them all for the couple. Two full months apart. Adrian in Evergreen. Y/N on an undercover mission in Egypt to scout out the exact location where Doctor Moon was doing his gruesome experiments.
"I will check in as often as I can but, baby, I might have to go dark for a bit," she explained to him the evening before her departure while they were having dinner together, holding her fork above her plate with a worried look plastered across her face. "I'll try to call you everyday if it's safe. Promise."
He frowned deeply, reaching out for her hands and squeezing reassuringly. "I know you will," he told her softly. "That doesn't mean I won't miss you though. If something happens..." he trailed off, frowning even deeper, his expression becoming solemn and serious. He shook his head, not allowing him the chance to continue what he was saying.
Instead, he lifted her knuckles to his lips and brushed a soft kiss along the surface of her skin. "I can't lose you too," he said, almost inaudibly but the concern dripping from his words was unmistakable.
"And you," she chuckled sadly, "Please don't do anything stupid until I get back."
"Wouldn't dream of it," he promised with a playful grin. The smile quickly disappeared when she guided him to the couch and buried her face in his stomach, cuddling his legs close to her chest and wrapping her arms around him tightly.
"I love you," she murmured tiredly, already beginning to drift off to sleep. "I'm gonna miss you."
"Love you too," he replied, running a soothing hand gently through her hair. He wished that their first declarations of love hadn't been so bittersweet. He wished he had the power to say those three little words earlier in their relationship instead of bottling them up and just waiting for her to say it first.
Those two months seemed to drag and drag, especially during the later stages of her mission because it felt like everything was moving in slow motion and no matter what he tried, nothing he did worked. He couldn't concentrate on anything that he was supposed to be doing and it was stressing him out so much.
Adrian was working overtime, spending all his spare time training or out on patrol or doing god knows what with Chris to get his mind off Y/N for a few minutes, hoping that one of these days she would call him because, as she had warned, her team had to cut communications. It had been two weeks since she'd gone dark and he was getting really fucking worried.
To top it all off, the Vigilante mobile broke down again. Chris was supposed to be giving him lifts but he kept forgetting.
Sad, tired and lonely, Adrian finished his last late night shift of the week and locked up the back door with a huff.
"You know, you should probably buy a new car at this point. The Vigilante mobile has called it quits at least four times since we met."
No way. His head whipped up, face brightening as he lunged towards that voice he recognised so well. And when he found her, standing there perched on the hood of her car, grinning like an idiot and looking absolutely jaw dropping in a tight fitting black kevlar suit, all he could do was pull Y/N in close to his body and press his nose into her neck, inhaling her scent with the most contented sigh he could possibly muster.
Judging by the fact that she still smelt of blood and mud and sweat, he assumed she rushed straight here after completing her job. They stood like that for several moments as he wrapped her tighter into his chest, relishing in her presence.
"Wow, I forgot how pretty you are in person," he admitted breathlessly once he pulled back to get a good look at her face, admiring her features and how they'd changed slightly since he'd last seen her. Her hair looked a little messy due to her lack of care but she didn't seem bothered by it, her skin had been slightly weathered by the sun and there had obviously been a few all nighters, but that could easily be fixed by a night full of pampering.
"Could say the same to you, handsome."
Without warning, he pulled her against him again, pressing a hard, heated kiss against her soft, smiling lips and revelling in the feeling that she'd kissed him back, the warmth that emanated from her body radiating through his own. His hands travelled to her waist and tightened their grip as she returned the favour, running her tongue along his bottom lip to deepen the kiss.
"Missed you," Adrian mumbled as he trailed his mouth down to her neck, peppering gentle kisses along her throat and sucking a mark into the soft skin beneath her jawbone. She shuddered against him and let out a gasp, grabbing fistfuls of his uniform and pulling him forward as he continued to explore her. "Missed you so fucking much... so fucking badly, baby."
She laughed quietly, her fingers tangling in his hair and pulling him closer to her as she gave herself over completely to the sensations that he inflicted upon her with only minimal effort. "I missed you, too. More than anything..."
He nodded against the skin of her neck, kissing and sucking a trail up to her ear before pulling back once again, smirking slightly at her wide eyes, red lips and flushed cheeks, then affectionately nudging his nose into her cheek before pressing another lingering kiss on that spot.
"Sorry, I should've asked to do that."
"I'll let it slide this time," she began, trying to regain control over her breathing.
Meanwhile, Adrian was busy playing with the zipper of her suit jacket, taking it off with deft, nimble fingers so that he could slip both of his hands inside her shirt and caress the bare skin of her stomach.
"Let's go home? Your place is closer and you look tired," he murmured against her neck causing her to hum lightly and nod her head. "Gimme the keys, I'll drive."
The second they exited the car, Y/N was lifted into his arms, her legs wrapped around his middle and her arms around his shoulders. "I can walk, you know?" she chuckled, burying her face further into his shoulder.
"No," he said teasingly, shaking his head and tightening his hold on her, "Not tonight. Besides, it gives me more opportunity to show off that I've been working out."
Her laugh rippled through her chest as her arms tightened around him and she brought them closer, leaning her weight more onto him as she closed her eyes to enjoy the moment before they reached their destination, which was the shower.
"I can take a hint. I stink, don't I?"
"I don't mind it. You, on the other hand, will be complaining nonstop in the morning about how horrible you smell."
"You know me too well."
Slowly, he removed her clothes with the gentlest touch he could as he had no idea whether she had gained any injuries or not. When he peeled away her shirt and saw the fresh cut on her abdomen and side, the sight made his stomach turn upside down and his heart ache.
"I thought it was a surveillance mission?!"
"Let's just say Warmaster was playing both sides and we had to make a very quick getaway."
Y/N was downplaying the seriousness of the situation a tad so he wouldn't completely freak out, although that's exactly what he was planning on doing.
"What!?"
Taking his head in her hands, she gazed earnestly into his worried gaze, rubbing circles into the soft skin of his cheeks with her thumbs in an attempt to calm him down a bit. He stared back at her with such intensity that he started to wonder if his stare was actually capable of burning a hole through her.
"I'm fine, baby," she reassured. "I promise. Just need rest and it'll heal in no time."
He remained silent for a moment, seemingly contemplating whether or not he should believe her or not as he slowly released some of his tense muscles and a shaky breath from his nostrils before closing his eyes, resting his forehead against hers, allowing her to ease the worry from his expression.
"Wanna join me in the shower?"
"Kill me if I ever say no to that."
She reached for his belt and seductively tugged him forward until he leaned down, capturing her lips softly in a heated kiss as they undressed each other piece by piece, savouring every single touch and brush of their skin. After being reunited with her, he could finally run his hands across every inch of her body, enjoying the feel of every curve and dip and bump.
Getting them actually into the shower was proving more difficult than she first expected. Every time she'd move, he'd manoeuvre her back so he could continue his thorough investigation, so she had to do some distracting. And Y/N was very good at distracting Adrian.
Slowly, she started at the top of his cheekbone and began a trail of kisses all the way to the outermost corner of his lips. When he tilted his head for the next one to land smack bang on his kisser, she dodged to repeat her process on the other side of his face. Once again, he tried to capture her lips and groaned when she moved onto his jaw instead, making his impatience skyrocket.
"Kiss?" he begged as he grabbed her waist and pulled her flush against his body.
Y/N grinned against his skin. "I am kissing you, baby."
"No." He rolled his eyes and hooked his finger under her chin, forcing her head up so he could plant a hungry kiss onto her mouth, holding her close against him. All focus he had was on her lips now. Step one was complete.
Step two was a little harder. Peaking through one eye, she walked him backwards until they reached the edge of the shower and she mumbled against his lips, "Take a step back for me, big guy."
She could feel him smile against her lips before obeying and successfully got into the shower without tripping over the step.
Then step three was to shower. He pressed her against the glass pane of the shower, sliding his hands underneath her thighs, holding her securely up while his mouth travelled to her breasts.
"Are we going to turn the water on?"
"Oh shit," Adrian muttered as he realised that they'd moved- he did know that his feet had been moving, he had no idea where to - and turned the knob accordingly, sending a stream of freezing water directly down her exposed chest. She squealed loudly and clutched onto him tightly, burying her face into his neck as he chuckled at her reaction.
Soon, but not soon enough for her, the water warmed up significantly, and despite the initial chill, Y/N found herself relaxing a little in his arms as he held her and gently rubbed her damp back. Yet, she still teasingly pushed him away from her so she could reach for the body wash.
"Gimme it," he demanded, snatching it out of her grasp so he had an excuse to put his hands all over her body again, not that he really needed one.
As the warm water ran down her naked flesh, he took his time to ensure that every single inch of her body was covered in suds, rubbing a lather over her skin and relishing in the sensation of having her this close to him again after so long.
"How was work, baby?" she asked sweetly and began working some shampoo into his hair. Adrian sighed contently and leant back against the wall of the shower so that he could rest his head on it, letting the hot jets of water wash over him as he closed his eyes.
"It was... alright, yeah, it was fine. Not interesting in the slightest, honestly."
"That bad, huh?"
He shrugged nonchalantly and allowed his eyes to drift shut as she worked her fingers gently through his hair, massaging his scalp with her fingertips until he felt like jelly under her touch. His eyelids fluttered closed for a brief moment so the shampoo wouldn't get in his eyes and he couldn't keep himself from sighing again.
"I really missed you. So much it hurts," he confessed quietly, feeling Y/N stop what she was doing for a split second, then resume the process of massaging his scalp gently. He opened his eyes a crack then turned his head to look down at her, watching the love in those eyes shine right back up at him.
"I'm here now, don't worry," she assured, placing a light peck on his lips.
Adrian returned her smile and cupped her face. And that was it for Y/N. No words were necessary since she already knew how much he meant to her, even when he spoke softly, his voice dripping with passion.
"I love you. Sorry I don't say it more often. Never said it to anyone else but you," he whispered as he lowered his face down towards hers, wanting nothing more than to drown in the feel of her lips pressing against his, his tongue invading her mouth as he kissed her senseless.
"Don't be sorry," Y/N said softly against his lips. "Love you too, baby." She gave him another quick smooch. "You gonna let me wash my hair or do you want to do it?"
With a grin etched permanently onto his face, he squished some shampoo onto his palm and got to work, gently running his fingers through her hair to remove the knots and tangles from the strands and to smooth them out, washing every inch of his lover's locks with such care.
Maybe Charles Boyle was right, washing your lover's hair is the most intimate gift of all.
"There we go! Can we fuck now? I've been hard this entire time - I've been a mess since I saw you in your tactical suit - and I think you might be suffering from withdrawal symptoms because you haven't had my dick in so long. Let me help!"
She felt nothing but excitement pooling in her core when he dipped his head to her breasts, trailing wet, open mouth kisses across her skin and nibbling gently. She let out a soft moan at the sensation, arching her back and grinding her hips against him.
"Shit, fuck, I've missed you so much," she breathed, unable to keep herself from gripping tightly onto his hair as his fingers teased between her folds, rubbing her clit gently and earning the sweetest sound from her throat.
"You're so beautiful, baby. So, so beautiful... like always."
His warm words sent heat rushing to her stomach and made her pussy throb even more with need, but she ignored it in favour of chasing after his lips as he devoured every last drop of moans and whimpers she could muster out of her mouth.
"Adrian... oh my God!" She gasped as he suddenly plunged two fingers inside of her in one swift motion, groaning at the feeling of his finger stretching her depths as he used his thumb to rub gently against the bundle of nerves below his fingertips. She bit her lip and clenched her fists tightly in his hair, moaning and squirming against his touch and desperately trying to push his hand deeper in her body, to relieve the pressure building up inside of her.
"That's it... that's it..." he purred and curled his digits faster, increasing the speed of his strokes until she felt her walls clench around him and begin to spasm in pure ecstasy.
A loud cry erupted from her mouth as she rode the waves of release and accidentally hitting her head against the tile when she threw her head back, her nails clawing desperately at his muscular back as left indents on his skin.
"Get on in here," she joked breathlessly, turning her head so she could see his smirk and couldn't resist kissing it lovingly. And he was more than willing to oblige.
"FuuuUck...this beats jacking off by, like, so much!" Adrian groaned in bliss as he lowered her onto his cock. "So, so good, baby..."
"Mm..." she replied, placing one hand behind his neck, tangling her fingers in his thick, wet locks as he buried himself further inside of her. The hot water cascading down over them created steamy fog, creating a haze over everything.
As he usually did, she couldn't help but notice the way he looked at her as they fucked, like he was looking at a goddess in all her glory; the love and appreciation and adoration radiating off his features filled every crevice of her heart to the brim, leaving her breathless and weak at the knees - which was fine because he was carrying her.
"You're so strong," she whispered, mostly to herself, as she caressed his biceps with her hands, her fingernails scraping lightly along the pale, bulging skin on his upper arm, eliciting whiny, soft moans out of him. He moved slowly, almost agonisingly slow, his cock filling her up to the brim in the most amazing possible way.
"God... you're so tight," he sighed against the shell of her ear while his thrusts began to become more desperate. "Like hella tight... so damn tight..." His grip on her waist tightened as he thrust harder and harder into her, his eyes screwed shut from the intensity of his pleasure.
With every thrust, the pair got louder. It was safe to assume that her neighbours were less than thrilled by her return, yet the couple couldn't care. Currently, they had other things on their mind.
"Missed fucking this pussy, babe," he muttered, his face buried deep in her neck, making her shudder at his words. "Missed fucking you so much. Every goddamn night. Every morning. I think my brain will explode if I have to imagine my dick ever missing your cunt for this long again. I swear I'll die if I have to do it again. My dick would fall off."
All her feelings of tiredness had vanished for the time being, replaced by an intense desire to be loved and cherished and wanted and needed by this man, and to reciprocate them straight back to him. As if reading her mind, he picked up his pace until the words coming out of her mouth were incomprehensible.
"You like that? Fuck yeah you do! Tell me you like it!" he groaned and was rewarded with nonsense babbles spilling from her lips as she arched her chest closer to his face, moving her hips more vigorously and meeting his thrusts with an eagerness that matched his own, her hands clutching his shoulders for dear life. "Did you think about this while you were away? Coming home to get fucked stupid?"
No words came to her tongue, so she simply nodded enthusiastically, tears mixing with the shower water as it dripped on her face.
"Did you touch yourself to me? To this?"
Another nod.
"Show me."
Reaching between her legs, she soon found her clit and began to stroke it, moaning loudly as she did so, her free hand still gripping his shoulders so tight they'd probably leave bruises. He seemed to take delight in her reaction.
"Yes. That's it. Just like that," he growled deeply and pounded his shaft in her with each thrust, his eyes rolling into the back of his skull at the sensation of her walls tightening around him and her nails scratching harshly at his back as if trying to get him deeper in.
Her moans rang loudly throughout her apartment and filled the whole room with the sounds of pleasure that left both their mouths hanging slightly agape.
"Fuck yes! I'm so close... so fucking close..." he ground out as he slammed himself into her one final time before she came undone and fell apart, her body spasming and sending them both flying into orgasm.
Their bodies stayed connected even after they finished, the tension leaving them with heavy breathing and a sweat dripping down their faces as they finally relaxed under the warm water. She smiled, reaching up a hand to caress his cheek, enjoying the softness of his stubble against her hand before joking, "We just wasted a lot of fucking water."
He laughed and pushed her hair out of her face, resting his forehead against hers as he did so. He took hold of her hand and intertwined their fingers together as he spoke, "I'm surprised neither of us fell over."
True. It's not the best idea to initiate an activity as vigorous as sex in somewhere where it rains indoors. That's an injury waiting to happen.
"Let's go to bed. I'm shattered," she yawned, snuggling deeper into his embrace. "It's been a long day."
Tired and fully sated, the pair wrapped themselves in towels and dried off before getting into bed together and cuddling up against each other. She closed her eyes and drifted off to sleep almost immediately, her arms slung around his waist and her nose buried deep into the crook of his shoulder while he held her tight and kissed the top of her head tenderly.
Sure, he was exhausted too, but right now the sight of her falling asleep in his arms was something he cherished very much, and knowing that he'd be able to experience it again tomorrow was enough to make him smile contentedly.
Throughout his life he always thought that this - that she - was some absurd pipe dream that would never happen to him; but as he stroked her hair and watched the rise and fall of her chest, he realised that he was wrong. It was possible. The proof was in his arms.
Even when he didn't cling to her, she still came back to him without fail. And maybe that was all he really needed. Yes, feeling her was nice. Seeing her boobs was cool. But, he knew that was all physical. The love and care he felt from her told him all he needed to know.
No matter how far apart they were, she was with him. And nothing could ever take that away from him.
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robinreflects · 3 months
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I got an ask for you!
For both Hazbin and Helluva, what episodes of each respective series do you hate/are your least favorites thus far? And what are the main issues you have with them, if any specifically call out to you?
Personally for Hazbin it's Episode 3. It feels the weakest to me structurally speaking compared to most of the other episodes, like Alastor was going and doing this thing he's up to while the B plot does fuck all to actually show the characters bonding together. Charlie and Vaggie's conflict there felt like the most nothing thing ever, too. Zestial deserved way more than Episode 3, I hope he has something to do in Season 2.
I think Carmilla definitely needed to have more time at that point to have the Vaggie parallel as well -- Whatever It Takes was a great song but the parallel felt kinda out of left field to me beyond the premise of the two having people to defend/protect (though I suppose it could be interpreted as foreshadowing for the characters' interaction later on). Until Episode 7 with Out For Love, not only are the two characters actually interacting with each other, but Vaggie's character is a lot stronger here, and her conflict with Charlie was stronger than the one in Episode 3.
For Helluva, GOD it's a 1v1 against S2E4 and S2E5. Besides the stupid dick joke that killed the energy for S2E3 I liked the rest of it enough compared to these ones. It felt like they kinda character assassinated Striker for the sake of, yet again, ANOTHER dick joke despite...Also making him hate sex/dick jokes???
And the camp one was fun but just felt really unproductive to the narrative besides the stuff with Blitz and Barbie. Then again, I thought that should've been its own episode, instead of some forced B plot in an episode that could've easily been more like S1E1, where we get to see the characters actively doing their job and it being actually funny and entertaining. (Murder Family is one of my favorites btw, I've seen it several times when we only had the first few episodes out. I wish the show had a bit more episodes like it.)
Hello! Thanks so much for the ask anon! I started writing this as a short post, but it ended up being way longer than I intended so... the Keep Reading option it is!
I don't particularly hate any episode of either show, but there are a few where I stopped and thought this... isn't that important in an 8 episode season, especially for Hazbin Hotel. Both of those shows are framed like sitcoms; where you have an ensemble cast of characters in the same setting and put them into semi-realistic situations which creates a comedic effect, the problem is sitcoms are usually at least 13 episodes a season long, but most times one season of a sitcom has the standard of making their season a 20-25 episode one (or... at least they did before).
For Hazbin Hotel, the lack of extra episodes shows very much, episodes 3 and 5 are so far the best examples of this in my opinion, they both very much feel like filler episodes. There are some very important establishments in both of those episodes, as you mentioned for episode 3. The setting up for Vaggie and Carmilla as an interactable duo later on in the show, as well as most likely foreshadowing Vaggie's and Charlie's argument later on in the season. Alastor's plot serves as a "subtle" hint for his ties to Heaven, which is (I'd confidently say) revealed in the last episode.
The song between Carmilla and Vaggie felt really forced and it's my least favorite of the bunch, I have a general problem with the songs in the show, which I will talk about later on. Carmilla's part of the song I understood or rather I understood why she was singing her parts; Vaggie's worry came out of nowhere. It can be argued that the entire B plot of Vaggie trying and failing to take on Charlie's role served as build-up, which then culminated into her part of the song, however, it didn't come across that way. Characters trying something that is typically not in their comfort zone and failing due to the circumstances or characters around them is a popular tactic in sitcoms for a funny scene (I mean the reason why s6 ep15 of Brooklyn 99 is funny is because Rosa needs help but is unwilling to ask for it and it gets to an absurd point) so seeing Vaggie trying and failing didn't come across as serious and as of deeply ingrained insecurity of her's as it was intended, which adds to the song feeling forced on her part. The problem isn't the fact that her plot of the episode had that surprise sad moment, but rather the fact that it went way too deep into her insecurities; the start of this was the "never fail you" part, and most that came after.
Episode 5 is way more of a character-focused episode and a filler episode than episode 3. Again, it is an important episode and serves as a very nice segue to episode 6 (my personal favorite), as well as giving us, the viewers (not the fandom, but new viewers who have found this show and decided to watch it, maybe having not even seen the pilot) some context into Alastor's character and status. Which is a good thing, Alastor's backstory is good character-building. And of course, introduces Lucifer to us for the first time, we finally see the King of Hell.
But that's.... just what it is, establishing. I can establish Character A in my own personal story, however, if I don't use or mention said character at all until later on in the story, so much so that people might have even forgotten about them, then I didn't do a really good job. I believe it's safe to say that Carmilla and Lucifer are both iconic characters within the show, so I don't believe people have forgotten about them, but I don't remember Carmilla or her weapons being mentioned once throughout episodes 4-6 when she and her weapons were an essential part in the finale. These points apply to Zestial as well, as you said I really do hope he gets at least somewhat of a bigger role within the show in the second season.
I genuinely hate being a person who says this, as I am a big musical theatre fan, but the songs come out of nowhere; the characters just start singing for no reason whatsoever other than the crew saying "I'd like a song here", most of them are really good (and I won't even go into the fact they got so many Broadway legends on the show), but that doesn't take away from the fact that most of the time there is no reason for a song to be placed in that scene. As well as most of the visuals of the songs looking like a mesh of those cool shots we've all seen in animatics on YouTube.
For Helluva... Fuck that'll be somewhat of a convoluted answer. The entire show kind of got away from what it was presented as in the pilot, so I have very much a hard time picking out which episodes are my least favorite. What I got from the pilot (which is always there to set the overall tone of the show and characters, as well as just test out how successful the show/premise would be) is that it's a modern sitcom-y spin-off (think Brooklyn 99, New Girl, Modern Family, etc; also those sitcoms that have cut to the funny event mentioned scenes) of Hazbin Hotel. So I went into it with that mindset, and the first episode does keep up with the premise we were originally given, which is why I like it so much. As well as Unhappy Campers, I really enjoyed that episode because it felt like it was keeping true to the original premise of the show. The other episodes... it's not that I dislike them, I dislike the abrupt tonal shifts the episodes give us; for example, Murder Family (as I mentioned) gives us that funny quirky sitcom tone the pilot gave us, but then Loo Loo Land is a much more serious episode. It's not a bad thing for a comedy series or a sitcom to have serious moments or serious episodes, it's great in fact. That being said, those scenes/episodes need to be done either later on in the show when we are already connected with the characters (such as Marvin's death in HIMYM) or have to be shown later on in the episode itself (Angel's abuse in episode 4) because the introduction scene (or first scene) introduces us to the tone of the episode and most of the time in sitcoms or comedy series the tone of the episode is supposed to be comedic. The serious scenes hit so hard because of the emotional plot twist we as the viewers are experiencing. In Helluva Boss though, most of the "serious" episodes' intros already have a serious introduction scene, which gives off the effect of drastic episodic tonal shifts.
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halloweenbitch2764 · 2 years
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It's A Scream, Baby!
Chapter Six
Chapter Five
Tags: @slxsher-whxre @deadpoetsandhoney @simpfo @robin-the-enby @slasher-lovers-blog @wallywaffle @ayyxitsme @voidsunflower14 @katerinaval @marisughh @ihavenoidea692 @kpopslur @gothicxbarbie
Classes went by as normally as they could considering someone had been killed. The teachers tried their best to keep the students attention but people wouldn't stop talking about it. People bombarded me with questions about it but I brushed them off. The news gave the necessary information and I didn't care to relive the moment. The cops had come in to question people. It was my turn and I went to the office, sitting down. One of the cops looked sympathetic while the other looked more cold.
"I know you probably have no involvement but we still have to question you Ms. L/N." The more sympathetic one spoke. "I understand." I spoke quietly. "So why did you kill her?" The other officer spoke. I was caught off guard. "What?" "You heard me." "How could I have done it? I was attacked for crying out loud!" I couldn't help but become defensive. Going through something traumatizing and then getting accused of the crime wasn't exactly something easy to come to terms with. "Exactly. So it would have been convenient for you to have messed your house up after killing her. Say you were attacked. Then nobody would suspect you." I couldn't help but furrow my eyebrows. The nicer of the two looked over at the accusor. "There was only about a ten minute period between Casey being killed and Y/N being attacked. Not to mention there were signs of forced entry at her house and according to Dewey she couldn't have looked more shaken up." The colder cop didn't seem to buy it but crossed his arms.
"Look you've been through enough Y/N. Just go back to class." He shot me another sympathetic smile and I headed back to my class. I couldn't help but feel angry that he would accuse me of it. He had next to no basis for the accusation.
I decided to stop at the restroom on the way back to calm down a bit. The empty halls felt eerie and I subconsciously played with my shirt as I walked. Suddenly a door, the janitors, swung open and revealed that wretched mask and robe. I screamed and hauled ass away to the bathroom, shoving it open and running to hide in a stall. Suddenly a stall was flung open to reveal the same outfit and another scream ripped through my throat. Suddenly the person pulled off the mask and bursted into laughter. I didn't recognize the boy as he laughed. Tears welled in my eyes as I walked quickly from the bathroom. I just headed straight for my classroom, not wanting to risk another incident.
Finally the bell rang signaling lunch and I gathered my stuff. I put my books away and got my lunchbox, heading towards our usual spot. I sat down and noticed I was the first to arrive. My class had been quite close to my locker so it wasn't surprising. I couldn't tell if I was hungry as I stared at my lunchbox. I heard shuffling and saw someone sit down in my peripheral. It was Billy. I could feel myself start to feel a bit more awkward. He was hard to figure out. It was easy to get a read on everyone else's personality but not his. Not to mention he didn't talk often which didn't help. Obviously he was something special or Sidney wouldn't be dating him.
"How are you feeling?" He suddenly spoke up, causing me to flinch. "Oh um...alright I guess." "Still shaken up from last night?" I contemplated telling him about the whole office confrontation and the guys jumping out at me. Something made me want to confide in him despite barely knowing him but I decided to only mention the office issue. "Kind of. I just got called into the office and one of the cops accused me of being the killer. Said I killed her and then made a mess so I wouldn't be suspected." I explained, popping a chip into my mouth. Anger flashed in his eyes. It was a bit strange. He barely knew me so why would it make him that angry? "Well that's bullshit. Doesn't even make any fucking sense." He kept his voice low but the anger was obvious.
Before he could say anything else Sidney sat down along with Tatum and not long later Stu came over. I decided not to mention the incident to them. I didn't want them getting angry about it. Little did I know there had been a witness to the guys jumping out and the principal wasn't about to stand for that happening. The whole thing was still so fresh after all.
Lunch was kept to talking about anything other than the murders which I didn't mind. I wanted to remain feeling as normal as I could given the situation. I finished up the day without much thought. While I was at my locker putting my textbooks away Billy came up, leaning against the lockers beside mine. "Can I help you?" I asked, a slightly playful tone to my words. He smirked slightly and I felt my cheeks tint a light pink. He was quite the charmer. "Well Sidney has a club to attend and Tatum is going with Stu so Sidney insisted I walk you home." He explained casually. "You don't have to. I don't live that far." I closed my locker and looked at him.
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ouroboros-hideout · 2 months
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Don't think you've got away from me with just 4 questions for Aon ;) 20, 25, 33 + 12 (this one for both canon!Aon & corpo!Aon)
Omfg you putting me up for some challenges here. Pls excuse if the answers for Corpo Aon are not as 'developed' as the ones for the main HC. But I will try my best for you!
20 - When they are sad or upset do they need company or some time alone
Canon Aon: In her teenage years she always reached out to the the people she considered as a confidant/friend or partner when she felt sad. It really helped her to hear encouraging words or just getting a hug. When she had to leave Moscow she lost a lot of trust and rather sticked to herself and hid this emotion behind other emotions like a security mechanism, so she doesn't had to reveal she felt sad. For example laughing over bad situations. She never really learned to reach out to someone again but good for her she found ppl who can look behind that mask (especially Anna and Kurt) and therefore can give her all the things she actually needs but would never ask for.
She can deal a lot 'better' with beeing upset even when she had to learn to calm her anger over such situations. It often just helps to talk openly about the things that annoy her, but if she gets to hot headed she rather be for herself to calm down to not say or do smth she would regret later
Corpo Aon: She's way more openly with those feelings and in general a more chill person. But that's because she has become 'emotionally numb' over the years with SovOil and sees a lot of think more rationally. But later when she's with Colonel Peacock a lot of the thick ice that she build up around her will melt and she will learn to become a person instead of a corpo robot.
25 - Do they have fears and phobias, and if they do, do they usally keep it to themselves or talk about it openly
Canon Aon: I think she developed a slight Agoraphobie especially in relation to large gatherings of people and large squares in cities. She has been followed by agents of the Secret Police for years and felt really insecure when she couldn't tell who are all the people around her. Getting paranoid and all that. She tries to hide that ofc or when Kurt wants to take her to the city she tries to find stupid excuses not to go. But at some point he even helped her to overcome that phobia.
And about fears there are two things. One as I mentioned in another question is that she doesn't want to dissapoint her loved ones. So probably a fear of failure. And the second is the fear to suffocate. Step(dick)dad put that trauma on her (I need to finish my writing *cries*). So everytime she gets in situations where she's really really low on air she can start to panic. Or if someone touches her by the throat (Kurt had to learn that at some point but turned it to smth good by showing gentleness. He can really be a good guy sometimes). And maybe quit smoking at some point, Aon. Could help. Just a hint lmao.
So all in all she tries to hide her emotions here too but sooner or later it will come to light or she has to adress it to not feel even more uncomfortable with it.
Corpo Aon: Can't really think of a phobias she might have but she actually fears to be alone and later in addition to lose things/ppl that are important to her. She was a huge loner in her SovOil time and therefore is a lot clingier than canon Aon. You therefore could imagine smth like midnight storm (since she already had big feels for Kurt there) and seeing him almost die, was a insane emotional rollercoaster.
And here she would be more open about those fears aswell.
33 - What are one of their fondest and most treasured memories
Good it is just ONE of the fondest. I am so bad at ranking stuff.
Canon Aon: I have a scene in mind, short after Midnight Storm when Kurt is at his lowest point ever he would visit Aon in Russia since he wants/needs her expertise to build up his black market (circus) empire. Aon would introduce him to some of her suppliers. I think it would be epic if she would work togehter with something like 'ice pirates'. I don't have a better name for it. Illegal smuggle ppl with a badass ice breaker ship. They would visit them in their 'pirate bay' far up in the north.
So Kurt is still really down, emotionally, physically, a mess in general. They would stay in a house/cabin at the pirates bay and Aon would ask him to come outside during the night to show him the northern lights. I like to imagine Mr. Worldwide has never seen them in reallife and would actually be wowed. And if there is something Aon really enjoys it's making the peacock speachless. So it was a small, kind of magic moment that helped to cheer him up. And around that time they started to become closer. It all still took some time to develope since they didn't saw each other regulary but let's say it was one of many moments that sparked something for them.
Corpo Aon: There are not much fond situations before she goes to America so one of the greatest memories she probably has was when she and Kurt opened up the Black Market in Dogtown and her businesses started to flourish. Like a new beginning for them - togehter. Leaving all past things behind.
12 - How high is their self-esteem
Canon Aon: When it comes to work her self-esteem is really high. She often even turns into a annoying know-it-all.
In other areas, she first had to learn her self-worth. Her parents, especially her stepfather, treated her like trash and she felt that way for many years. As unwanted, outcast and a mistake. Only when she was with the Nomads and found many people there who appreciated her, her personality etc. and later also met Kurt who accepted her with all her strengths and flaws as she is, it gave her a boost and she also became more confident here.
Corpo Aon: For the most part, she only defines herself through her work, so she has a stronger sense of self-worth. She also never had to go through the teenage traumas like Canon Aon. Well, she did go to war, but these experiences also helped her to grow.
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lucreziaq2001 · 4 months
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•TV show: "Criminal minds".
•Content warnings: Mentions of a baby getting sick (nothing serious), babies being taken away from their unmarried mothers, some of those children being sold to wealthy families instead of being penalty adopted, mentions of a teenage girl's death, the Church's view of unmarried parents in the 1960s, a nun trying to justify her actions, but then revealing how ashamed she was of her actions and talking about the day she realized what she was doing wasn't right.
•Some of the lines are almost the same that are in a scene of the "Cold case" episode this story is inspired by. I did modify them a bit, though. I didn't just copy and paste them.
•Tags: @lex13cm, @golden1u5t, @rynwritesreid, @reidmeister, @justalesbianwithsomegayshit, @thatonewritersstuff, @marril96, @c-m-stuff, @criminal-addict.
Between their two hearts
Chapter 19: The night Jennifer died
The following day, Scarlett and Jacqueline were supposed to go to the religious community where Sister Margaret lived to talk to her, but in the night, little Hudson had fallen ill, so his mother had had to stay at home with him and Scarlett had decided to make the journey alone for once.
When she had arrived at the community, that time the director immediately let her in and accompanied her where Sister Margaret was.
"Now I know why you wanted to protect Saint Bridget's" Scarlett said when she arrived near the woman, getting straight to the point, as she was in no mood for pleasantries "The reason is that you sold the babies born there to the highest bidder, and Jennifer had discovered it".
"I don't know what you're talking about, ma'am" the nun responded, clearly lying.
"This is the register of Saint Bridget's" Scarlett replied, placing an old book with a black cover in front of her "In 1968, one hundred and fifty girls lived at the institute and the same number of children were born. The official adoptions were only one hundred and twelve, there's no trace of the other twenty-eight on any kind of document".
"I know," Sister Margaret then said, apparently without a hint of shame for what she had done "And I did it for the good of everyone involved".
"Oh. And can you still sleep at night?" the younger woman asked, angry at the nun's lack of remorse.
"The donations to the church weren't enough to support Saint Bridget's" Sister Margaret explained, still trying to justify her actions "Those children were adopted by couples who could raise them very well".
"You mean couples who paid very well, right?" Scarlett retorted, feeling even more bitter and nervous by that time.
"I've never hurt those girls in any way!" the nun exclaimed, although that obviously wasn't the truth.
"You locked them in a room and sold their children" Scarlett reminded her "Don't you think that was hurting them?".
"The Church said that they weren't good mothers and it was our job to save as many of them as possible" Sister Margaret told her, initially with the same confidence she had displayed until that moment, but then lowering her gaze in shame.
"Until 1968, I believed what we did was right" she added a few seconds later "It was like that until Jennifer made me understand how wrong I was".
Then, just like she herself and other people had already done for Jacqueline and Scarlett quite a few times those days, the woman started to talk about one of the events she remembered the most from the time Jennifer had spent at Saint Bridget's.
That one, however, was going to be the story of the night that young girl had died.
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abnomi · 6 months
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⚠️ HUGE SPOILERS FOR BEACON PINES
hi im shy but i want to share some writing i did using the dialogue in beacon pines as a base... just expanding on conversations that happened in-game so that i can start writing my own stuff later :-] i wrote everything aside from the dialogue between sharper and kerr! this is purely exploratory, i wanted to explore the dynamic between them further.
this is the walkie talkie conversation that Beck picks up on her radio in chapter 5... the exchange was so fascinating to me and revealed so much about Kerr and Sharper and their relationship. made me rip off all of my eyelashes kind of
Chapter 5 - Dangers Big and Small; Radio Interference
Too angry to sleep, Beck tried dialing in with her radio set to see if she could find something interesting after her disapproving mother left her room. She had scolded her for her freshly dyed blue hair only moments before, to Beck’s discontent. How else was she supposed to hide the new gray hair she had grown just earlier that same day? She thought it made her look like some kind of mature academic, or someone who'd been through a rough office job of thirty years in a twelve-year-old’s body.
After channeling through random channels for about five minutes, she picked up on a signal. Someone was talking. The voice through the radio was strangely familiar… a somewhat nasal voice that at least a dozen in town shared, all eerily similar.
“Mr. Kerr? Are you there?” A Clipboard was on the line, a concerned and somewhat urgent tone breaking through the static. What could he possibly be requesting for at this hour? The desperation in his voice subtly got more evident at his second attempt to call. “Mr. Kerr?”
“Yes? I'm busy. What is it?” An annoyed William Kerr finally picked up, carrying a dismissive effect in his speech. He hoped this would be brief; he didn't have time for nonsense, and his urging impatience shone through in the way he spoke.
“Apologies, I have the founder on the line.”
Immediately, Kerr's attention was piqued. “Patch him through immediately.” He felt much more alert than before, heart racing in his chest. Even a mere mention of him without a name being so much as uttered was enough to send him into a fit of anxiety.
“One moment…” the Clipboard meekly replied.
Trying to compose himself the best he could given the few spare seconds he had, the hyena affably greeted the founder who was now on the other line, gleaming a honeyed presence. The man was able to switch between masks so effortlessly; it was like second nature to him. His adaptability was one of the few traits that had consistently served him well, especially in urgent cases like these.
“Hello, sir!” Kerr chirped, “It's so nice to hear from you!”
There was a pause. Kerr's mind raced in the space between; did he say something wrong? Did his words not come through?
“Skip the pleasantries.” Sharper Valentine was very straight-to-the-point; a man who always took himself very seriously, abiding by the high standards he put himself upon. He held his ego up twice as tall, his dense assertive confidence obscured all else and mismatched his temporary small stature. The irony of his voice being that of a child’s was always uncanny in the way it never aligned with how he carried himself. It was just as raspy as it was before, due to all of the smoking he did on a regular basis, throat scratchy and gruff. “What's your report on our new Lead Researcher of Deep Engineering?”
Beck’s focus on the conversation grew more and more as she processed what was going on, now even more so that they were talking about her mom. What were they doing with her?
Kerr responded a bit flatly to match the atmosphere Sharper had created. “Nelly Moedwil seems to be integrating nicely.”
Her name. Beck hearing her mom's name felt like getting hit by a truck. Now there was no denying it; something was wrong. She might be in trouble. These people can't be trusted.
“At this very moment, she's working to help us meet our deadline,” Kerr continued. “She offered to work overtime before I even had a chance to suggest it.”
“Excellent,” Sharper emphasized his next sentence, “and you have faith that she's capable of finishing the work left by her predecessor? Her work must be complete before the festival.”
“I will make sure she stays day and night until it's accomplished.”
Beck had to refrain herself from saying anything; she was in a state of shock. Even if she tried to speak, she was already stunned into silence, her throat tight.
“Good. You know how I feel about loose ends.” These words implied some ominous undertones. What could he possibly mean by that? Beck had to ruminate on this later, listening comes first.
Grimly, Kerr replied. “Yes, sir.” He'd dealt with loose ends before. At least he knew what to expect this time.
“Once she has finished the work, we need to make a determination regarding her… long-term prospects in the company.” Everything this guy says gets more and more suspicious. Every time Beck thought that it couldn't get worse, it did.
“Immediately, sir?” Mr. Kerr sounded concerned, feeling unsure and hesitant. He didn't want to argue, but something was telling him the chances this would work out well were low. “I usually have more time to fully bring people into the fold.”
“We are in the endgame, Bill.” The only one who ever referred to Kerr by that name was Sharper. The only man who knew his true identity used a nickname for a fake name. A fake of a fake. “After your failures with Dr. Prescott, I can't afford to take any risks.”
The emphasis put on the word “failures” felt like a punch in the gut to Kerr. Fully obedient and submissive to Sharper, he was determined to never let anything like that happen ever again. It was a fault of his to allow it to happen in the first place, a permanent stain on his image; a stain on his image to the man who had promised him everything he wanted, no, needed, of all people. “Of course, sir. No loose ends, sir. Once she finishes the work, she will either leave the office completely committed to Perennial harvest…”
Beck held her breath.
“...Or she won't leave at all.”
She felt lightheaded. Blood drained from her face, causing a chill.
“Perfect.” There was a distinct satisfaction in Sharper's voice. Every conversation was like a competition to him, and he had won this one; just as he always did.
Before Sharper could hang up, Kerr timidly offered a proposition that he had been waiting to give. “Sir, if I might suggest,” He swallowed and took a quiet deep breath, trembling slightly. “Maybe we should delay. Just for a bit.”
“Oh?” Sharper did not sound enthused.
Kerr felt a sudden surge of dread and regret overwhelming him, but his mouth kept running. It was too late to back down now.
“It's just… we seem to be rushing to hit this festival deadline, and rushing into some things has caused some…” He was cautious with his next choice of words, making sure he wouldn't make any remarks that could be interpreted as an insult. “... issues in the past.”
Whenever Kerr spoke to Sharper, he felt as if he was tip-toeing around landmines. Anything could set him off; the threat of consequences always loomed over the subservient fraud.
“I see…”
Kerr winced, knowing it was too late to take back his request. In a pleading voice, he added, “Please understand that I just want what's best for you. I'm eternally grateful for all that you've done for me.”
“Bill, I'll make this very clear for you.” His words felt like weights being dropped. Disapproval was drenched in his voice. “I brought you in to make things run smoothly, not to have opinions.”
“Of course, sir.”
His reply to his boss must have sounded more defeated than he intended it to, because he responded with an unusually encouraging reassurance. “Chin up, Bill. You are only a few days away from having everything you've ever dreamed of.”
Drained from the emotional rollercoaster of speaking with Sharper, Kerr finished off with a “Yes, sir. Thank you, sir.”
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I feel I need to have a deep conversation about gender with a man fully confident that he is a man, and a woman fully confident that she is a woman in order for me to be fully confident that I am gender fluid.
I've had a few conversations with my roommate (a woman around my mom's age), and they have been rather... inconclusive. In fact, in one conversation my roommate said she would also be confused if she had grown up during this time. I didn't reveal my own questioning of gender identity to her, in fact she started the conversation because she was upset about children transitioning. But I do think she is fine with adults doing it (though she will subtly judge them).
Anyway, this conversation just confused me more. And whenever I try to subtly talk to my mom about this stuff (the one other female role-model in my life), she just says these things I bring up is similar to how she was a tomboy as a kid.
This made me think I was just a tomboy for the longest time. But then I tried to fit that mold and found it wasn't quite right. This led me to think I was actually a man. I liked comparing myself to men. I felt like there was a connection in me to identifying as a man. But after I tried embracing being a man, I started to realize I missed being girly. I wanted to wear dresses and learn to do makeup.
So I thought I must be a cis woman faking being trans for attention. But that didn't explain why I had literal dreams of living as a man. Why online, I never wanted to reveal my gender. Why I felt so happy when an old man on a bus once called me sir.
That led me to looking into nonbionary and eventually gender fluid. I read up on other people's journeys, I explored terms, definitions and labels, and I came to the conclusion that I didn't have to fit into male or female. I can be more than that.
But I still have doubts. I am a scientist, and I can't be satisfied with an answer being conclusive without exploring alternate routes. This means I need to know what people feel when they are confident they fit into the mold of male or female. I need to see the molds and try to fit in them. I need to talk to those who fit slightly outside the molds but still strongly identify with the mold. I have to thoughtfully examine all of this or else I will never be confident in my identification of gender fluid.
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