#she deserves better but at some point i cant help being angry at her for doing this to herself | Explore Tumblr Posts and Blogs

stevie-petey · 2 months

Note

Hi! I know it's pretty late to be asking this but I got a random blurb idea at three in the morning so I thought I'd send it in before I forgot it. It's for season one, episode 5/6.

After Steve finds Jonathan and Nancy in her bed and tells bug she deserves better he drives off with Tommy and Carol. Basically his POV that whole car ride. He's grieving, in disbelief and heartbreak. He's angry and sad, not only for himself but for bug. Tommy and Carol are only riling him up at this point. Remember how Tommy or Carol said something like " wow Steve you're right she really is pathetic to still stay with him" maybe we see the convo where that came from. I feel like he was excited to be around who he thought were Nancy's friends outside of barb, and it all came crashing down.

Again this is really random and super late but I was just thinking about season one Steve and this scenario popped into my head. For being such a little shit Steve really is handsome.

i loooove this idea omg yes ! n never apologize for sending blurbs i love doin em

enjoy <3

"did henderson really defend that creep?" carol practically throws herself over the drivers seat in disbelief of what steve has just said.

"she did." steve tightens his hands around the steering wheel. his mind is reeling. hes hurt, hes so fucking hurt, and hes angry. for you, for what nancy has done to him, for what jonathan has done to you. for years youve been his little pet, always doting on the boy, and he still has the fucking nerve to hurt you like this. "shes pathetic."

the words burn steves tongue. he regrets them immediately.

tommy snorts. "i mean, yeah. shes hot, but at least have some self respect, ya know?"

the boys words only cause steve to tighten his grip on the steering wheel harder. youre not pathetic; youre selfless. youre so fucking selfless and always see the good in people. it infuriates steve. youre everything and more, and hes seen people abuse this rare kindness for years. make fun of you for it, mock you as if the kindness you bring isnt a breath of fresh air for everyone.

he hears a yelp next to him and steve knows that carol has slapped tommy for calling another girl hot in front of her.

"i just dont get it," steve sighs out. theres so much he wants to ask, to say and plead and demand. he cant get the betrayal in your eyes out of his head. youd looked devasted when hed told you what he saw at nancys. how jonathan had been wrapped around her.

and yet even as the hurt crossed upon your face, you still managed to swallow down the hurt and see the good in people.

in the people who didnt fucking deserve it.

"fuck if i know, man." tommy rubs at his arm and glares at carol.

she simply rolls her eyes at him and goes back to picking at her nails. "why do we assume she even knows how to do anything other than put on that angelic act bullshit?"

"what, like she doesnt know how to be mean?" tommy asks, furrowing his brows.

steve stares straight ahead. "all shes ever been is kind."

"exactly," carol throws herself against the drivers seat again. "whos to say its real? not some creepy act? better yet: how do we know shes not, like, fucked up in the head?"

youre not. steve has seen your intelligence. youre the top of your class and hes had to shamefully ask you for help with english homework.

tommy frowns again. "wait, i thought she was smart."

"god, youre dumb." carol shakes her head. "what i mean is, what if she physically incapable of being mean. like, some chemical imbalance in her brain."

"could explain her freakish devotion to byers." tommy says.

steves grip tightens once more hearing the boys name. jonathan byers. resident creep who somehow has captured the heart of hawkins sweetheart. the same boy who has now cheated on her with steves girlfriend.

he will never understand this.

nancy has hurt him, shes abandoned him like everyone else has, and he knows that somehow its his fault.

but you? you dont deserve any of this.

what carol has said makes sense. maybe you really dont know how to be mean. if youre physically incapable of it, then steve decides that he has to do something about it.

if you need to be mean, then he'll be mean for you.

#ask #anon #m speaks #come home blurb #m's writing #set in season 1 #steve bless u #ur so dumb #very heavily “if u need to be mean be mean to me” coded btw

45 notes · View notes

winderlylandchime · 8 months

Note

And we are officially at 3x12: ‘come on Brian, don’t act like you don’t care about the backroom being closed. You said it yourself: you love public fucking’ ‘Damn, maybe Michael is actually gonna be cool if Hunter sticks around. I can’t believe they are actually keeping him like a stray cat. *looks at me all fake seriously* this is a good time to tell you, mom and dad also found you outside like that.’ ‘Im gonna need them to leave Emmett alone! Everyone leave him the fuck alone! I feel so bad for him- mel can you stop acting like Emmett is on a trial?’ HUNTER IS ABOUT TO MEET BRIAN!!!! ‘HE DOES EXIST BITCH! BRIAN FUCKING KINNEY! What did I say?! Everyone has a crush on Brian! Okay, i like Hunter now.’ ‘TED YOU FUCKING PIECE OF SHIT! I feel so horrible for you but i am willing to put my feelings aside to rip your head off! Emmett deserves happiness not this shit’ ‘damn Ben can’t catch a break. His man AND his stray kid both being obsessed with Brian. No wonder he’s boring. SHIT HE KNOWS THE DEAD KID! OF COURSE A FUCKING COP DID IT. Why am i acting surprised? Carl, i had some faith in you, please dont fuck this up fully’ and now the infamous Deb at Brians party scene ‘DEBBIE IS BACK AT BRIANS! COME ON BEST FRIENDS! *pauses tv and looks at me* is this what I look like to you when I’m watching this show? Wait. Is this what i looked like when i asked (our uncles name) how gay sex works? Oh my god, I am Debbie at a gay orgy! Wait, is she expecting Brian to save the day with this cop killer thing? So the theme of the show is: blame Brian, use him for help and money and be mean to brian, got it’ ‘he told Justin about the dead kid picking up a cop? Yeah Brian is officially caring about it because no way is he gonna ignore just- oh Teddy, this is heartbreaking. Emmett baby, you’re above this. I get it but fucking hell you deserve better. Who the fuck does Mel think she is to just call Emmett that?! OH SHIT EMMETT CALLED HER A CUNT! GOOD FOR HIM! Thank you emmett. I know it’s bad to be happy about this but she is very rude sometimes. Im still angry for how she treated Brian about that life insurance or whatever.’ BRIAN AND HUNTER SCENE IS UP!!! ‘Hunter go hom- peanut car! BRIAN! Now this duo is something i can fuck with. So hunter and Brian. Or Jen and Brian. Or Daphne and Brian..so basically everyone except Mike.’ And the bar scene is up ‘this is the most depressing bar ever no wonder its a cop bar- are they trying to find the cop- HEY HE HAS A BOYFRIEND! SO HANDS OFF!(hunter offers to pay Brian) everyone is willing to pay him. Hunter. Justin. At this point, give me 4 more days and I’ll pay him too. BRIAN BE CAREFUL WITH THE COP, why are you asking so many questions? Who do you think you are? Oprah? He has no business looking this pretty while horribly interrogating a murderer.‘ And now the sad Ted and Emmett scene is up ‘NO TED! WHAT THE ACTUAL FUCK IS GOING ON WITH HIM? EMMETT GET OUT. LEAVE. DONT LET HIM DRAG YOU DOWN TOO. EMMETT HE NOT ONLY WANTS TO DO DRUGS HES ALSO TELLING YOU HE CHEATED! Emmett nooooooooo’ and the best part of the ep is up: Britin hustler scene!!! ‘Oh damn Blondie, look at you looking fine as fuck! Absolutely no dying young will be happening on my watch Brian! *waves his hand towards Justin* yeah, whatever he just said. Too big words for me right now. Do they have matching jackets or is he wearing Brians clothes? Brian really cant escape teenagers who have a crush on him. *said at the same time as justin* EXCUSE ME? He’s the boyfriend! See hunter, the reason Brian laughed is because Justin has owned his ass for the past 3 years! Blondie…you’re 19. And you were a stalker stealing credit cards at 17. That is considered an annoying teen’ ‘NOO HUNTER DON’T GO WITH HIM! FUCKING HELL THIS SHIT BETTER NOT GET HIM KILLED. I actually got attached to the little fucker’ And to end this on a good note, he went out to call his friend to tell him about the episodes and a cat scared the shit out of him and now he’s afraid to leave the house. At 36. I have a 5 year old child that I’m babysitting, who has a crush on Gale.

I’m snorting about him telling you your parents found you like that. That’s some peak sibling behavior.

He likes Hunter because of his crush on Brian? So relatable. I’m so excited he’s at this part.

So the theme of the show is: blame Brian, use him for help and money, and be mean to Brian. What’s that meme that’s like “you did it, you broke qaf down to its bare essentials? That’s this.

Emmett is so lovely during this arc, and so relatable. I agree with your brother about everything.

Do they have matching jackets or is he wearing Brian’s clothes? I die! Brian really can’t escape teenagers who have a crush on him. YUP. I love Justin’s complaining about teenagers. That is such an iconic and hilarious scene.

You are doing such a good job babysitting. And he does have a crush on Gale. He’s going to find out that Gale is straight and wow, I want to know his reaction.

Thank you for these summaries! I love them!

#ask winderlylandchime #dear sweet anon #queer as folk #a straight man watches qaf us 2000 in the year of our lord 2023

2 notes · View notes

avesgraveyard · 1 year

Note

Avery, oh my god I think I have a love-hate relationship with this chapter like I love it but I cried through most of it and it frickin hurt

(I think I need to stop relating so much to Evan lolll-)

I cried through like the first fourth or third or this and then I was like oh maybe things are getting better but NO back to tears

DORCAS I LOVE HER SM I WANT HER SHES JUST SO WHOLESOME AND KIND AND I CANT WAIT FOR THE DORLENE CHAPTER DORCAS MAKES ME FEEL THINGS

“Me and Barty? Talk about feelings? Our feelings? Yeah, that’ll work out.” me with literally everyone ever lolll

Evans getting so frustrated and worked up over this and it hurts so much WHY Avery why do you have have to make me FEEL THESE THINGS

“This being the monumentally huge crush I’ve had on my best friend for– what– years now? The one I thought I had under control?”😭😭😭

stupid pretty Italian boys and their wicked heart-stealing ways. This whole thing made me cry so much but this made me laugh for some reason-

But poor Evan baby oh my god how he’s loved Evan for years and Barty never noticed him like that and that’s fine or whatever sad but okay

But then Evan felt like if he did all THAT to himself it would Barty love him baby no and that no one noticed for awhile until Dorcas but then how she helps him through it and Reggie when noticed god these friends make me so soft but that Barty didn’t really notice or didn’t seem too 😭😭😭😭😭

No, Evan. I think it makes you human.” DORCASSSS

Okayyyy Barty needs to be careful with ev like I get why ur mad but be carefulll but I guess he kinda does deserve to be angry to an extent bc like he just realized he’s in love with Evan??? And then he ran off but evan kinda did too but also evan almost kissed him??? How’s Barty supposed to take that???

Lolll evan one paragraph he’s actually kinda scared and then the next- hmmmm Barty needs a haircut

if Regulus was single– noooooooooooo

Evan making valid points tryna protect himself but he also just hurting them both

“ Please , Evan, just one. I’ll make it good for you, promise.”😢

Barty switched so fast from SCREW YOU LETS TALK to we should kiss 😏

and ev’s running again…..

When he punches Pandora plsssss

I thought you were– like fucking robbing me or something. EVANNNN

Marlene. Ring so cheerful not even noticing pandoras gushing blood at firstttt

“Subtle, James,” like always!!!

Silence. Evan looks up. Not one person is looking him in the eye, in fact, they’re all looking at his chest. Evan glances down. He can’t see anything. He glances back up. No one's eyes have moved.

“What? Have I got something on me?” He looks back down, then up again.

Barty is the first one to break the silence, standing in the corner of the room, with his arms folded over his bare chest, a pair of sweat pants hung low on his hips, a lethal smirk and a hungry glint in his eyes. Evan doesn’t think he can handle any of this at this time in the morning. Or ever, for that matter. “No, baby, there’s nothing there. You’ve just got a nice… physique, is all. We’re just appreciating it in all of its shirtless glory.”

okay first of all I SCREECHED and that Evan not even realizing but then Barty being soooo taunting he’s going to get what he wants and he knows it-

but the implication that evans doing so much better physically at least maybe then he was seventeen/eighteen yesssss

“What? Have I got something on me?” He looks back down, then up again.

Sure enough, Regulus’ gaze is raking approvingly over Evan’s torso, Marlene is grinning at him like she’s a shark and he’s her next meal, and James actually has a string of drool coming down from the corner of his mouth, concern for Pandora apparently forgotten. Evan suddenly has the urge to reach for the throw on the back of the sofa and wrap it around himself securely. Is he ashamed of his body? No, of course not. He’s worked hard to get like this, and he’s overcome a lot of things, physically and mentally, but the way Barty is currently looking at him makes him feel, well– a bit indecent.

AHHH THE REACTIONS OF EVERYONEEEE

(And then bartyyyyyy)

“Evan, you actually ran away when I tried to get you to have a chat about your feelings. Evidently, conversation won’t work. But that’s okay baby, I’ve got other methods. We’ll work it out eventually.” Okay then Barty ….

WONDERFUL as usual, Avery, you really know how to get me right in the feels and even though I cried half the time I loved this so much. Dorcas and evans relationship is so awesome and I love them Pandora oh my gosh I love her and I can’t wait to see how Barty tries to get Evan bc it’s going to be hilarious and it’s also going to hurt lol

ily, thank you so much!!!

dude this is so nice of you actually teared up,

this chapter was a mess, acsolutley 100% a brain malfunction on a page. but it was probably the easiest chapter to write. evan and dorcas' relationship was SO important in this, because Barty? Barty has Evan for when things get rough, and Pandora, and Regulus. And while, yes, evan also has barty, there are just some things he cannot tell him. so he goes to dorcas, like an older sister- younger brother relationship.

i get that after we hear evans story we're all kinda pissed at barty for being so brash about things, but he DOESNT KNOW. i just love writing their emtions, they're so much fun.

i so appreciate this you have no idea <333

#averyanswersasks #rosekiller roadtrip au

6 notes · View notes

princess-pill-enjoyer · 1 year

Text

i don't get it. im in a position where i can make so much progress. ive had interviews damn near every day this week. I go to therapy now. i dont do pills. i eat. i try to talk out what im feeling more. but its just not enough. theres STILL something there and im edging closer to it. i can feel it. im on the brink of something horrible. i dont know what's going to happen once i reach that point. im scared of what'll happen. but it feels like once it comes i wont be able to hold back. i genuinely dont know how i did this before

being so busy.. i think it was a buffer. i never felt involved in my feelings really. id just ignore them and hide them away. in one hand, im glad i am where i am. the highs i feel feel so different from back then. ive never felt satisfaction like i do now. some times anyway. but the lows STING. i can really simmer on them now. it gives the gnawing insecurities Ive been feeling a meaning. a place in me that i have to accept. i have to actively accommodate for it all now. or ill implode

every day feels like a gamble. i cant express how little i want to do/be here. i dont care about any of this fr. i care about hurting people. its paralyzing. Ive always been such a people pleaser and i cant let it go. I will minimize everything until i absolutely cant anymore. and atp i feel so backed into a corner. my only two options seem to be either blow up and forced somewhere until i can find the drive to do something other than killing myself... ooor... kill myself. i swear that wasnt on purpose lmfao. but seriously. i mean what are the other options? i can barely push myself to do anything anymore. i dont care to. id isolate from everyone if they didnt reach out so often. well that and they notice now. ive ghosted everyone too many times they all know to just act sad so ill come back T^T

i get really tempted to tell my best friend about all this. i feel like i talk too much about myself nowadays. or talk too little or too boringly on others. but then i reread ts i used to say back/how i used to say it and i think ? i prefer us now ??

HA nah. im sure its the insecurity talking. i really do love her. she is the one and only i know will stick around no matter what. no matter how boring or how angry i get she does not hate my guts. i wish i didnt like her so much tbh. it makes me angry how angry i get with her sometimes. i cant help myself when i notice something off. shes the one person i can openly express my frustrations without consequence. but i take it too far cause of it. ive had no experience with that sorta shit. i try to be better to her cause of it. i think its only fair. the junk ive put her through this last year.. the rage ive thrown at her. thee inattentiveness. selfish. ive been too focused on making myself feel better that ive let her sting because of it. i want to make it up tenfold. she deserves more. and if i cant have her in the way i want her, i will do my best in whatever place she wants me in instead. for now, thats been a more casual friendship. she doesnt talk to me as much about her feelings. her heart is really broken about her ex. as much as i dont understand what she sees in her i know that she needs her time to bounce back. i think shes getting it out of her new person. she talks about how annoying she finds her and how she disrespects her boundaries a lot. they broke up almost immediately. but she stuck around because she felt obligated to and now i think theyre building something better. hopefully. i dont meddle as much now. i dont want to hear it + prying shit from her is NOT worth the effort. when shes ready, shes so eloquent. i love listening to her talk. even when its about nothing

im gonna stop babbling about her now. i wish i wasnt so close with her i swear i make myself disgustingly obvious.. anyway. i bring up all that to say, her battery is dead. i want her to focus on making herself feel better for now. she needs to stop overextending herself so damn much. i wont let myself be another burden for her to bear. though with such a giant rush of new feelings and a single person that i know loves me no matter what.. its kinda hard

i wish that i could talk through everything with her. if only it were that easy.

i think im going to relapse not gonna lie. it makes no sense not to. ig for my health but aside from that? itll help me feel more careless. i wont need to cut myself, i wont need to blow up, i wont need to think anymore. i can just focus on acting sober annnd holding down a job. much easier than holding back whatever this is now. if this could come out of me without leaving a broken mess, i would. but if i ever told anyone my true feelings id make them sad. i need to lash out to gain the momentum to bring it up.

im gonna stop writing now. i feel like ill go on forever again.. its just been tangent after tangent

#dph addiction recovery #vent

1 note · View note

thefanficmonster · 3 years

Text

Few Too Many

Corpse Husband x Reader (Female)

Warnings: Swearing, In-game violence and death, Suggestive comments

Genre: Protective fluff, Humor, RPF (Real Person Fic)

Summary: Jealousy is a dangerous thing, especially when the jealous person is armed with a gun....in a game of Counter Strike. At least Y/N’s friend will now know not to mess around and flirt with her, especially not with Corpse around.

Requested by 🐐 Anon. Hi dear! Thank you so much for your request! Sorry it’s taken me so long to complete and post your request but here it finally is! I didn’t want to make it IRL violence to avoid triggering anyone while I also felt it’d be very ooc for Corpse to beat someone up but I still hope you enjoy the fic if you come across it and read it! Love, Vy ❤

“Hey everyone!“ Y/N greets her squad as they all customize their characters while I sit there, observing and unknowing of what I’m supposed to do. “I invited Corpse to play with us today, hope y’all don’t mind.”

“Of course not! Nice to finally meet you, Corpse. We’ve heard a ton about you from Y/N, thanks for making our girl the happiest she’s ever been.“ One of her friends says, the tone of his voice suggesting he’s only half-joking with the dad like comment he made.

“Nice to meet you too, man. Glad I’m the one she gave the chance of making her happy. That’s all I ever wanna do.“ Though it may sound cheesy, as guys, her friends can probably read into how genuinely I mean what I’ve said.

Dating a girl with only guy friends has it’s pros and cons. Which outweigh which is still up for debate since I’m still researching, but so far so good in my opinion. This is the first time I’m interacting with them directly so I’ve still got a long way to go in terms of getting to know them and the details of their relationship with Y/N better. Regardless, I at least know they can easily understand me and put themselves in my shoes if I ever ‘mess things up’ with Y/N and she goes to complain to them - something that will most likely never happen. I’d never dare make this girl upset. Chances are, if I do, her friends won’t get to me on time - I would deliver my own punishment just the way I think I deserve it. However, there’s also the chance of them getting super protective of her and ganging up on me over something as small as a fight. By the many things and stories Y/N’s shared with me about them, I believe they wouldn’t think twice about kicking someone’s ass for her. They’re not massive dudes - I’ve seen pictures of them - but I for one don’t ever wanna see em angry.

“Ay bro, what’d you do to score our best girl? You must know what she likes. If so please, by all means, do tell.“ One of them, not the one who was previously talking, speaks up, his words making me furrow my brows in both confusion and irritation.

I open my mouth to complain as I slowly start cracking my knuckles when Y/N and her friends beat me to it. Thing is, Y/N’s friend group consists of three guys and her and yet four voices scolded the guy that made that suggestive comment. That being said, this guy probably isn’t considered to be one of her friends, at least not one that’s a permanent part of her friend group.

“Seth, cut it out!“ The guy I was previously speaking to says sharply before softening his tone to refer to me, “Sorry about my brother, excuse his lack of brain cells, please.“

Just then, I also receive a message from someone. Checking my phone, turns out it’s Y/N who by the way is currently in the living room while I’m in the recording room. Her text reads:

Y/N ~ Ignore Seth. I told Leo to not invite him but he’s still here somehow

I send her back a quick reassuring text before answering the guy I now know is named Leo, “No worries, it’s fine.”

“See? The guy can take a joke, you’re all just freaking out over nothing!“ Seth laughs, reminding me and the others of how loud he is compared to us.

Despite acting like it’s no big deal, I can’t help but admit to myself that this behavior of Seth’s has awoken a deeply buried suspicion of mine that’s not only mine but also arises in every guy whose girlfriend hangs out with a lot of guys. It’s not that I don’t trust Y/N - she could literally blindfold me and tell me to walk through a pool of lava, promising it wouldn’t hurt and I’d do it - but we all know about that saying that every guy in a group with one girl has liked said girl at least once.

Disturbing to think these four, including Seth five, dudes could’ve possibly been my competition at some point. It’s nice that they’re all super chill about it, mostly cause some of them have girlfriends as I was told.

Nevertheless, we get over that hiccup and carry on with the small talk and preparations for the game. Since it’s my first time playing CSGO, Y/N, Leo and her other friend Clancy explain the mechanics to me in detail to avoid me getting confused mid-game and getting myself killed. When they finish, we start the round and wait for the game’s algorithm to separate us into two teams which Y/N jokingly refers to as cops and robbers. Unfortunately, the end result of that separation ends up being me getting put in the terrorists’ force with Leo and Clancy while Y/N’s with the FBI, partnered with Seth and her other friend Evan.

“Alright, team, we shall now disperse. Corpse, remember, if you see more than one of them, radio in and lay low, we’ll be with you as soon as possible.“ Leo informs me as he runs off in one direction, Clancy going in the opposite. I confirm I understand and go along my way too, heading for this ancient looking structure that looks like it could belong in an old-timey movie.

Walking in, I realize the place is way bigger than it appeared on the outside. A quick look up confirms that there are three fucking floors above, not to mention that the ground floor is huge. Luckily, there are many crates and barrels to hide behind if I come across an FBI agent. I sure as hell hope it’s Y/N, I could maybe even try talking her into giving me a second chance at life and pretend she never saw me. Come to think of it though, I’d probably prefer getting killed by her rather than her friends - especially Seth.

Given that we’re in a Discord call, I can hear all the conversation going on. They are all quiet though, I can just periodically hear the mumbles of someone muttering to themselves as they navigate the map cautiously out of fear of running into their opponent unprepared. The silence is put to an end though when Seth speaks up, addressing Y/N.

“Yo, your boyfriend’s with the terrorists, ain’t he? That’s like the universe giving you a sign that y’all shouldn’t be together.“ The fucker laughs at his own joke while I can literally hear Y/N rolling her eyes.

“Have you heard of Romeo and Juliet, Seth?“ She asks sarcastically, almost getting a chuckle out of me but I suppress it to avoid getting caught listening in.

“Yeah, they both die at the end. Fucking boooriiinngg.“ Just then, I spot two silhouettes entering the building. Aiming my gun at them reveals their names - just the people I’m currently involuntarily eavesdropping on. Seth and Y/N don’t notice me though so I quickly duck behind a crate and prepare to radio in when Seth continues verbally torturing Y/N and dancing on my last nerves, “I personally think the friends-to-lovers trope is far more interesting...“

Did this guy just- no, he’s gotta be fucking kidding me

I’m left with my jaw hanging in disbelief at this guy’s audacity. I have no doubt Y/N’s about to put him in his place herself but I just gotta have my own chat with this guy. And by ‘chat’ I mean I mindlessly rush out from behind the crate towards where I saw him and Y/N and open fire on him. I hear his startled and upset screams with Y/N’s laughter in the background. She doesn’t try to stop me as a teammate of his should and would, instead she just observes the scene unfold, laughing her ass off.

“Yo man what the fuck was that for?!“ I hear Seth’s yell but only faintly since the sound of gunshots is still echoing through my headphones. Yeah, I’m not done shooting this fucker.

“Corpse...Corpse, buddy...“ Y/N manages through fits of laughter she cannot tame, “That’s a few too many bullets, he’s already dead.”

“And that was a few too many comments for him to be let off the hook.” I answer as sharply as I can with the new-formed smile on my face. What can I say, her happiness is contagious.

“Well, you got your first kill in CSGO. Good job, babe! I’m super proud of you!” She cheers for me, clapping her hands excitedly.

“Nah that was my first overkill.“ I quickly add, with a more threatening tone: “And it won’t be my last.”

“Let’s just hope there aren’t few too many of these overkills either.“ She snickers.

“That doesn’t depend on me, babe.“ I say smugly, suggestively enough for Seth to pick up the dropped hint. Mother fucker’s officially been put in his place and I couldn’t possibly be happier - with the added bonus of getting a ton of laughter out of Y/N who also decides to walk away, leaving me unharmed but promising to shoot to kill next time she sees me.

I’m ok with that. She could kill me anyday.

@maat-the-prescriptive @simonsbluee @save-the-sky @itsminniekat @hacker-ghost @bi-andready-tocry @imtiredaffff @jazzkaurtheglorious @hereforbeebo @fandomgirl17 @chrysanthykios @maehemscorpyus @loraleiix @letsloveimagines @annshit @i-cant-choose-a-username-help @enigmaticmaze @divine-artemis @waterlilypat @idontknowwhatthisisfam @evi-ka @classyandfabulous00 @redperson58 @lilysdaydreams @solowheein @mythicalamphitrite @axen-gers @luckygirl144 @nj01 @buddyemily @the-albino-lioness @stardream14 @gdhdkfnn @nomadicgypsyy @preciousskye @fluffysuicideunicornsworld @o-kaelin @manacharlotte @awkward-youtube-trash @lolalee24 @bonky-beerns @meme-lord-and-savior-sebastian @strawbrinkofdeath @teenloves @tams0527 @browneyespinkhair @starstruckllamapuppy @daisychains012 @y0ulooked @tinytacosuitcaseflap @supernatural-is-my-only-life @jula-pauline @melodykitty @just-that-bi-girl @crazybutconfidentaf @lowellshade @alphakees @bellero @weallneednamjesus @starryhanji @boiled-onionrings @husherstan @fockingwhore @melaningoddessthings @prettypastelpetals @haleypearce @godwhyamiawkward @y-napotat @daisychainyoonmin @little-miss-rebel3 @free-wheelin-bi-sexual @redmoon261 @darkacademic2 @wiseflamingoqueen @into-the-end @namikhai-i @nastiablr @thelittleplantlover @mirktuan @dont-hyuck @jjk-bunny @vintagegothlover @easygoingtheatre @itsrandombooklover @miiaivi @emmybaybee @befourgolden @jjk-is-my-shit @eternalteaaars @spacebadgerx @princesslunalight @acequinn14 @samm48 @misselsbells06 @simp-lykawa @fo-love @marishimomura-blog @therealglenncoco @cinnamonbun332 @killtherandomness @sanshinexxxsan @fee-btheweeb @press-lay @cathleenpotgieter16 @jazzydoesstuff @moonlxghtbay @forestrain2000 @hyunjinhugs @blood-of-fandoms @lovellylies @ukiyolixx @simpforhpcharacters @chrisdylan17 @parkerjisung @pedernille @theodonyous @wineandionysus @malfoystilinskii05 @morbid-x @coryisagee @jessewa26 @scoobydooluver97 @mindintheskies365 @raeanneinwonderland @indecisive-empanada @gluttonypalace @loriane2503 @btsiguess-kpop @khaoticbunny @lucidlycactus @smiithys @rottenroyalebooks @kpopgirlbtssvt @fangirl-tc27 @fr0z3n-1 @notmesimpingfortechno @shotarosleftpinky @kunoi-chan @idk-whats-wrong-with-me @yikeroonie @goldenstarofthunderclan @poetry-and-tea @ama-do-writing-stuff @wishbonewolf @emeraldxhope @t0xick1tty @kusuinko @speakyourselfloveyourself @sophia902103 @lo-manburg @classsykittykat @dmgama @depressedpuppythatneedscoffee @btsiguess-kpop @akaashi-baby @gun-jong-simp @geschichtenfee @yerapotato-wp @browneyedgirl365 @thysagclub @sparklycloudnight @helloatomicshadow @queentorresstuff @vtte @val-gal @lucy-bunny17 @aaliyahh0 @katluckybear @boyleanti @straybids @franchesca-791 @cosmicstorm19 @averyisbackinthetrashcan @aomi-nabi @xlanawriter @allensimpsforcorpse

293 notes · View notes

dylanobrienisbatman · 3 years

Note

The main problem with the whole mal vs the darkling thing in regards to being possessive (or really when it comes to any of their traits) is the fact that throughout, the darkling is clearly framed as the villain and his actions reflect that, whereas Mal as supposed to be the good guy and best romantic partner for Alina, and yet he has all these awful character traits and tendencies. So its less about how awful the Bad Guy is (since he's supposed to be), and more about how awful the person that we're supposed to believe is the best option for Alina is. I don't ship either, just my two cents.

Okay well... two things. First, your comment about "its less about how awful the bad guy is, since he's supposed to be", takes every comment I've made about Darkles out of context, which seems fitting since everything Darklina's spout about Mal is out of context. Him being the Bad Guy is fine, and if you like him AS A VILLAIN, and acknowledge all the bad shit he does, then my posts aren't for you. I think he's a very interesting villain, and a lot of the terrible shit he does that I have to keep making posts about make him a good villain, the problem is when the terrible shit the "Bad Guy" does is romanticized and viewed as the reasons why Alina SHOULD have picked him. So, don't assume everyone gets that "hes supposed to be awful". The point my post was making is that Darklina's love to call Mal possessive, but then turn around and act like Darkles literally enslaving her in somehow sexy and romantic. It's fucking not, and it's transparent as hell that y'all romanticize and sexualize the actually possessive character, and then project false character traits onto Mal. It's so transparent, it's almost funny.

But, more importantly, to your second, very wrong point, I wonder how much of the narrative about Mal having "awful character traits and tendencies" is actually a commentary on Mal as a character, or is it just Darklina's lying about things Mal has done and everyone accepting that misinterpretation as canon. Because, if were making a list...

Fuck boy - False! Mal was not a fuck boy! He was an attractive teenager who hooked up with consenting girls his age when he could, and he was not in a relationship during that time. Alina had never told him how she felt, so he is not beholden to her. (Also, nobody seems to have an issue with the fact that Darkles hooked up with Zoya in the show, that doesn't make HIM a fuckboy... interesting) (also also, nobody seems to discuss Darkles literally sexually assaulting Alina, and lying and manipulating her to get her to be physically intimate with him so he can use her... double interesting).

Slut Shames Alina - FALSE! The ever favourite callout line from Darklina's "He's all over you" isn't him slut shaming her. First, he has no idea what their relationship is like at that point, but more importantly, he is making an observation of her status in the little palace and how she has become his tool. He has dressed her up in his colors, made her put on a show for his benefit, and has created a situation where Alina appears to be his. Mal is noting that after months of searching for her, believing she was being hurt, tortured, or worse, when he arrives to save her, she looks like the Darkling's pet. (and, even if he WAS angry because he perceived them to be romantically involved, boy just spent months fighting for his life, lost multiple friends, and almost died to find her, all while coming to the realisation that he was in love with her, and then he shows up, after not hearing from her for months... I'd be pissed as hell too.) Important Note: He even acknowledges that what he said was wrong and tries to apologise, before Alina tells him that he was right. (Shadow and Bone, pg. 286). He also then apologizes, completely unprompted, for what he said. (Shadow and Bone, pg. 297).

Fat Shames Alina - False! This one is particularly laughable to me, because its one of the Darklina arguments that falls apart the second you actually read the scene. They are running for their lives in the forest, and Mal has to hunt and gather to feed them. He is noting that Alina's appetite has increased since he last saw her, and he makes a joke (ya know, how you do with friends) about how it would be easier to keep her fed if she still had her more meager appetite from before. He makes no comment on her weight, or her size, and he is not actually commenting on her appetite in a negative way, he is just acknowledging that it's a lot more work for him now that she eats more. Right before he says the line, the quote even proves that he isn't shaming her or thinking badly of her: "With a bemused expression, he watched as I gobbled down my portion and then sighed, still hungry". He is noting a change in her, and complaining that its made more work for him. If you think thats the same as fat shaming, well... thats a you problem.

Hates Alina's Powers - FALSE!!!! How to begin... do we talk about it was Mal's idea to hunt the stag in S&B, because he knew she needed it to be more powerful so she could stop the darkling? Do we talk about how he vowed to find the firebird for her, even though he was terrified of what all that power would do to her? Do we talk about how he literally died so she could achieve the power she needed to save the world? Or maybe we could talk about how he believed in her power more than anyone else, like when everyone was making bets about her abilities with the Cut and he knew she'd go further and better than anyone else expected her too, or when he tells her that he was never afraid of her powers, only what seeking all that power would do to her (which is literally the theme of the books, that power corrupts and seeking unmatched power can destroy you)? Mal being afraid of what is going to happen to Alina, being protective of her and worrying over her, is not the same as him hating her powers. He exists to help remind Alina of the themes of the story, and to guide her into maintaining her humanity.

Abusive - ... Do I even need to explain this one? Must I deign an explanation as to why this favourite Darklina lie is so fucking stupid, and also totally hypocrisy? No? Because we all know Darkles is actually the abusive one and they're trying to project their own shit onto Mal to further their abuse apologist agenda? Cool. Moving on.

Possessive of Alina - False! Throughout the entire series, Mal is quite literally the opposite of possessive, but yall just cant read. Not only does he quite literally step out of the way and allow Nikolai to court Alina without argument, which is the most direct example of him not being possessive, he also spends two full books believing, and repeatedly saying over and over and over, that they can't be together because he is not good enough for her. Mal believes, fully, that Alina deserves more than him, better than him, because he's just a tracker and a soldier, just a regular man with nothing to offer her but his love and his protection, and she is a Saint and should be a Queen. Possessiveness is the wish to own and control someone, it is literally the opposite of Mal believing that he's not good enough and doing everything he can to ensure that Alina achieves everything and gets everything he believes she is owed. A possessive character would not tell her to tell him to leave because he has nothing he can offer her, no title or land or country or crown. A possessive character would not promise to be the blade in her hand, because he believed he had nothing but the blood he could spill to offer her.

Angry - True! Yeah, omg, you caught us, Mal is ANGRY! Heaven forbid a teenager who is traumatized beyond belief and has to give up everything in his life, his position in the military (he deserted for her), his friends and the job he loved (Mikhail and Dubrov died for him, and he can't be a tracker in the army... because he deserted... for Alina), and, most importantly, he has to give up Alina (she should be Queen, he believes, and he has to give up the future he imagined with the girl he loves, who he was pretty sure loved him back, because she's a saint and queen and he's just a man), and more, is ANGRY. He has to be the one to find the amplifiers that he knows will end up hurting her, because thats what she needs to save the world. He has to sit by while Nikolai treats him like the dirt on his shoe and tries to woo Alina for his own personal gain (because Nikoalai did not love Alina. Maybe he came to care for her, but he proposed and spent all of S&S trying to get her to marry him when it was obvious they were not in love. He straight up says its so that the next King of Ravka can be married to the Sun Summoner. It's a power grab.) and he can't do anything about it. So yeah, Mal is angry. And yeah, sometimes he's even angry at Alina, just like sometimes she's angry at him. But they always find their way back, always apologize and try to be better for each other, and if you think anger is a toxic trait, and not simply a natural human emotion, might I suggest touching some fucking grass?

Idk why you thought I'd stand for Mal slander on my blog, cuz I will not. So, I'm gonna stop there, because I have shit to do today, but I really do wonder how much of Mal's 'toxic' or 'terrible' traits, that make him such a 'bad' love interest for Alina, really comes from Darklina's who refuse to actually read the text critically at all, and instead take everything he does and says out of context to further their agenda that Alina should have ended up as the Darkling's fucking slave forever, because thats the "girl power feminist" ending somehow. Mal supports her, loves her, sacrifices for her at every turn, and does everything he can do, to the point of literally dying for her, to ensure that she can defeat Darkles and save the world. He protects her, and when they end up happy and safe together on the orphange that they've rebuilt to help the children that were victims of Darkles war and genocide, he spends his days bringing her tea and cakes and flowers, kissing her silly under the stairs in the view of all the teachers, and calling her names like beauty, beloved, cherished, my heart for the rest of their ordinary life together, if love can ever be called that.

#Malina #anti darklina #malyen oretsev #mal oretsev #shadow and bone #if yall could just learn to fucking read... i am begging you

261 notes · View notes

tender-rosiey · 3 years

Note

Hi, requests are still open right? If they are could you do Dazai, chuuya, (and if you do females) Yosano, and Kouyou headcanons where their SO is on their period or sick? I’m dying of cramps and I thought it might make me feel better mentally at least. If not that’s totally okay!

❥ Bsd characters with a s/o on her period

~Includes Dazai, Chuuya, Yosano and Kouyou

A/N: my period was done just yesterday and it literally had me crying when it came this month ._. I hope this helps you love 🥺💘— Also my little brother literally searched in front of me about the meaning of period and I was suffering trying to stop him 🤡

Dazai Osamu:

Is and will be a little bitch and tease you about it

“Belladonna how can you bleed from your vagina like that?”

“Just like how I can make you unable to reproduce children anymore.”

When he read more about it he felt so sympathetic towards you and feels bad about how he teased you at first

“I am sorry for being an asshole and I promise I will get you and give you anything you want, my love; so forgive me? 🥺”

Who can say no to this man?

Definitely not me

“WHY DOES MY BELLADONNA HAVE TO GO THROUGH SUCH SUFFERING?”

Cuddles are very common in your relationship and he adores them

So when you ask him to cuddle you because your cramps are being a bitch, how could he say no?

Gets you all your cravings in a s e c o n d

Will literally wake up at 3am and go to the store to get you anything

Always reminds you that he loves you and pampers you so you don’t get it in a foul mood

If god forbids he made you angry then he will try

Keyword: try

And calm you down

If shit goes down hill then he will hide behind anything to protect himself from you until you are at peace

He doesn’t like seeing you cry

Hell he doesn’t like pain or suffering if it’s directed to him

So if it’s directed to you, you bet your sweet booty he will go infinity and beyond to make the pain go odasaku

OMG I AM SO SORRY PLS I LOVE ODASAKU I SWEAR

So when Little Miss P comes in and goes “Hoe let’s cry for some hours!”

He will be by your side and doing anything to sooth the pain

“It’s okay, Love”

“It won’t last long”

“I am here for you”

“I love you so much”

“You are so strong and amazing for being able to handle this, belladonna”

Chuuya Nakahara:

“What’s a period?”

You sent him to Kouyou so she can explain the struggle you go through every month

Took him a while to comprehend though

When he did he ran towards you and screamed “HOW DARE YOUR BODY MAKE YOU SUFFER LIKE THAT EVERY MONTH; YOU ARE A FUCKING GODDESS, YOU DONT DESERVE TO BE HURT LIKE THAT-“

When he calmed down he had promised to make your period days the BEST by pampering you and loving you to the point

You WANT your period to come

Not saying that he doesn’t already make you feel loved

“God I want ice cream”

0.00000001 seconds later Chuuya is in front of you with three boxes of ice cream

Cuddles

And cuddles

And CUDDLES

If he slightly raised his voice at you when you are on your period

He will keep apologizing and make it up to you in any way possible

“Y/N, baby please you know I didn’t mean to yell at you, right?”

Kisses your tummy

Heating pads are always with him in case

You know that TikTok of the girl waking up her boyfriend at 12am for ice cream?

Yeah he is like that

“Babe I love everything about you and I love you but please let me sleep. The Port Mafia is already stripping away my sleep.”

“But I want cookies ༼ ◕n◕ ༽”

“Fucking cute ass cutie making me feel so giddy how dare you-“

If you are crying then he will be by your side all the time rubbing soothing circles on your back

“It will al be okay, dove”

“I am here for you,

He loves you

So much

Will give you the world if you want

Yosano Akiko:

Our queen here knows your pain

And as a wonderful doctor she already has the pain killers ready

“YOSANOOOO MY PERIOD IS HERE AND THE CRAMPS ARE-“ “I have the pain killers, let’s cuddle :)”

She is so sweet

Your cravings are always beside before you even think of asking

If you cry then she will try and make you laugh and make you forget about the pain

If laughing isn’t working then she will hug you and keep kissing you all over your face

She knows that making you angry would be a death wish

She is very careful with what she does around you

And if you both get your period at the same time

It’s literally a mood

Like you are both tangled in a hug on the bed like sacks of potatoes

Strongly refusing to get up and you always scare the shit out of anyone who does try that

Poor Atsushi tried it

“Yosano-san, Tanizaki is injured and-“ “CANT YOU SEE I AM SUFFERING AND CUDDLING MY PRECIOUS GIRLFRIEND?”

He never got near you guys whenever you were on your period ever since

If you are sensitive to being touched while on your period (like me but it’s only sometimes 😔

Then she will not do anything that will make you be in pain or uncomfortable

Heating pads are always ready for you, your majesty

You guys watch YouTube together and cover each other with the blankets like burritos

And take all Ranpo’s snack supply

She is gentle towards you but also hyper

“Hey cutie! How’s my strong girl doing?

“Don’t worry, I am not leaving you; I am just gonna get you some food.”

“Y/NNNNN DONT LEAVE ME; I KNOW I CAN BE SCARY BUT PLEASE STAY”

That being said, if she is on her period then she will whine if you ever

EVER leave her side

She just wants your affection

If she gets it then she is a happy bby

Ozaki Kouyou:

“KOUYOU MY PERIOD IS-“

“I have everything ready, my dear”

A damn goddess and is super duper caring like

Ma’am why aren’t you real?

LIKE LOOK AT HOW SHE IS TO KIYOKA DESPITE BEING WITH THE ENEMY

WHAT TF DO YOU THINK SHE WILL BE WITH THE LOVE OF HER LIFE?

Knows your period better than you

Will literally spoil you with anything and everything

Pads? Check. Food? Check. Comfort? Check.

If you are crying then she will be there with the tissues and kisses

“Let it out dear, it’s not good to bottle things up.”

Trust her, I have bottled shit up and ended up breaking down at the worst moments 💔

“I am always here”

If miss pain is camping in you for the night

Then she will be there to shoo her away

“What is that you desire so I can bring it to you?”

Another person who will wake up at anytime and get you anything 🥰

Bby looks so calm when she is on her period in front of people

But behind closed doors

She is a respectful whiny baby

“Dear, can I get a hug? 🥺”

And lord when she gets needy

She is literally super adorable

“Kouyou what’s wrong?”

*mumble mumble*

“Kouyou luv, I cant hear you”

“I want a kith” she said it while hiding her face with the sleeve of her kimono

PLS I CAN IMAGINE HER BEING LIKE THAT

I headcanon that she gives the best hugs

Fight me about it if you dare >:(

do not copy or plagiarize or you will be reported

446 notes · View notes

papers4me · 3 years

Text

Fruits Basket Manga Review , ch 112 & 113 (part 2)

I hate that this chapter is cut... mainly cuz it deals with the most “ horribly presented” theme in furuba anime.... grief.

-The shame of grieving: “ Rarely discussed theme in Literature”:

When a love one dies... ppl differ in how they deal with it. Some cry their hearts out, some become depressed & painfully lonely, others get angry or cynical, some might deny it, some move on quickly, others move on but years after the realization crushes them, others stay still... Above all, you feel ashamed of yourself if you didn’t move on or if you DID move on.. “ Sometimes ppl around you judge you for it... for your grief”

The later is the theme of these two chapters. Rarely discussed themes & it saddens me that it is cut. You see, Furuba anime doesn’t get grief at all. To them, it’s a small part of the generic protagonist after she finishes her job of nurturing the real main protagonist. Mothers are strong, they help us cross the bridge between childhood & adulthood. Tohru, the show’s mom, did it so thoroughly & in slow visual & narrative details for yuki. Afterwards, the anime brushed whatever is left of her character, which the anime viewed as sheer suspenseful drama, & collected it thro 3rd person story-telling techniques in one ep “ se3, ep6″ & excessive monologue for 10 minutes in se3, ep9.

In this chapter, Kakeru, a side character, sheds light into this theme. Kakeru didn’t lose a parent by death, didn’t grieve, has no dependent familial bonds with either dead parents “ kyoko & komaki’s dad”. Yet, kakeru stood & judged tohru on how she “ should” grieve. Harshly tearing her down while she’s standing there lonely, trying to hide her shock at the loss of her only pillar in life, broken & traumatized, dealing with the pushed down traumatic feelings from her past where her mom abandoned her as a child..now her mom did it again, this time thro death.. & kakeru, rightfully not knowing all that, but wrongfully lecturing her on how to behave... kakeru isn’t a monster, but he only saw what he wanted: komaki & how the world should grieve with his lover, how he should be the hero protecting her. So self-centered, insensitive, horribly cruel & unbelievably conceited, but above all... what he did is so sadly common... it hurts.

-Judging Grieving People:

As I said many times.. grief is so personal, so unique to the person & as common as it is, so misunderstood. According to kakeru & many ppl I’ve sopken to lately, tohru should have acknowledged komaki. Komaki, the not-traumatized version of tohru, did the right “ tohru-like” thing. Not only felt sadness at the loss of her own dad, but found it in her heart to visit the other orphan, tohru, & give condolences & respect to the dead mother. Such kindness & purity. Very deserving of applaud: To not only see your pain but others’ as well. Tohru has always done the “ right, kind” thing to other ppl. When she can’t now, the author brought another “ tohru” to do the “ right, kind” thing.

Kakeru is so many ppl. During my brother’s funeral. I’ve heard so many gossip on how my mom should’ve stood tall & greeted the visitors.” Being silent , emotionless & non-responsive is not how you show visitors you value their kind words”, they said. How his widow should’ve collected herself & acted properly, respected his memory by taking proper care of herself & her kids. “Being a broken mess is not how you “ honor” loved one”, they said. Kakeru is indeed many ppl & that’s how you discuss a theme by creating characters who sin, screw up & be cruel, even if momentarily.

Kakeru is wrong. There is no “ you should have” in grief. There is no ounce of truth in his demeaning lecture to tohru & I respect komaki for her reaction to him so much. Kakeru did learn & grew from it, apologized to tohru even if he didn’t actually sought her to do so & even if she herself started the apology. But you see, these two chapters are 90% focused on kakeru as a character, his growth, thoughts, the mini focus on his relationship with komaki as an example of healthy relationship & all that is another lesson for yuki to observe & learn. He learned abt tohru’s past, kakeru’s personality & growth & got to observe another example of romantic relationship so yuki can grow as a man & approach machi healthily. But then again... nothing at all stops yuki/machi from being healthy, no past issues, no contradicting personalities “ they’re quite similar” & yuki is the only furuba character that doesn’t screw up big. He learns & teaches. He’s the personification of the author.

-Tohru.. stays a “ tohru”:

Tohru’s part is 10% of the this chapter which is fine as I think/hope it will lead into more tohru depth in the following chapters. But It is for this reason I’m glad this chapter was cut in the 13 eps season of furuba anime, cuz tohru doesnt have much depth in the anime due to the quick wrap up & the la~~~~st thing I want is another 3rd person story-telling flashback abt tohru in the anime. Honestly, one of the most frustrating aspect to me of the anime & I’ll hold judgement abt manga- tohru till I reach its end. So far~~~ Tohru’s depth & character exploration gets better one chapter, then regress the next one, then moves on, the... it’s a fluctuating process. It has nothing to do with tohtu’s feelings.

you’ see ... kyo himself as a character with issues fluctuates a lot, he does sth good, then does sth bad, chooses right words, then makes a horrible mistake & chooses wrong! which is one of the most well-done aspects of character exploration that is rarely attempted by authors! I highly respect Takaya-san for what she’s doing with kyo in the manga so far. Other authors show us a character doing one big mistake & then he/she learns from it in a dramatic way. But Takaya-san, nope! she decided to approach it in a very human way, making us be frustrated with kyo’s repeated mistakes yet understands where he’s coming from! kudos to her!!

But I’m not yet satisfied with how tohru is portrayed in the manga & this has nothing to do with tohru’s character. Takaya-san is discussing rare themes thro tohru’s character. But what I mean is how tohru is approached thro the viewers/readers eyes. I wont judge until the last chapter. but this is the part that is frustrating to me.

Side Notes:

The flow of the 2 chapters is little off. We go back & forth between the past & the present, between yuki-machi & komaki-kakeru. Again, I’m so glad the anime cut it cuz, nope! they can’t handle such narrative. they’ll reorder it in a such heavily monologing way & insert the comedy abruptly to lighten the mood. Just look at how the comedy is inserted in momiji’s se03 ep!

Komaki is such a tohru with a sprinkle of kagura’s very softened outbursts. lol. she’s fun!

I’m liking yuki-machi interactions a lot. no drama, which is why the anime cut it -_-’, but it progresses healthily. Machi is yuki’s third-stage growth after (1) leaving tohru’s nest (baby yuki), (b) making friends with kakeru/someone who gets him (young boy yuki), (3) finding romantic love (being a man). The anime was so interested in the 2 stages above cuz that’s where the drama is & cut the third. Honestly, the anime didn’t have to include everything as there is never a space in 13 eps, but they certainly could’ve squeezed few panels or even made brand new very short yuki-machi scenes. but the anime weirdly decided after yuki “ saved” machi from her trauma by talking with her in her apartment, he should just marry her.... lol.. that’s why next scene is ep 5 momiji’s ep intro montage where yuki was abt to confess!!! making yuki-machi the least developed couple in the anime!

I love all furuba’s characters, but yuki, tohru, kyo & akito carry the big themes, therefore, I not only analyze their characters, but how the themes are presented thro them & how their presentation affects such themes. This might make it sound as I hate them or am harsh on them. not at all. It is the anime director/ manga author that I’m positively or negatively criticizing most times. Most importantly, my criticism is not the law. It’s just my perspective & my consumption of the material. Feel free to differ with me. I dont mind it. It brings interesting discussions!

When it comes to tohru’s issues... his chapter introduced nothing new. We have seen/read in canon repeatedly that tohru hides her pain behind a smile (heck! even kisa knows that & told us), that she cant stand up for herself much, that she smiles for other ppl not for herself. All this was presented thro so many characters already, which is why I understand the anime’s decision to cut it. What’s new? that yuki didn know tohru’s smile is mostly a mask & that kakleru has depth.

I love this chapter for the grieving themes it discussed that are rarely touched upon in literature, but since such themes are rarely presented, the anime’s decision to cut it, ironically proves my point! lol . They don’t get grief & so, they reduced it to se03 content & two eps worth. sad.. but expected. The anime is indeed another form of “past” kakeru: seeing one side of grieving person. The happy side.

#Fruits Basket #Anime Only #manga review #fruits basket manga #manga spoilers #sad paper #I love you little bro #I miss u

59 notes · View notes

justcallmenikki7 · 3 years

Text

BTS Reaction To: Boyfriend Moments

Twilight!Au & Imprint!Au

Hyung Line

Summary: cute moments with your protective, goofy, werewolf boyfriend

Warnings: twilight/imprint!, mates, cutesie shit, badboy!hobi, protective hyung lines, sassy seokjin, jin roasting a girl, sad?insecure?reader?, namjoon’s part is pretty emotional and the reader is depressed/distressed? I don’t know how to explain it. min yoongi being whipped for read. I think implied d/s relationship for both yoongi and hobi’s part. Oh, hobi being whipped 10000000%%%

W.C.: 2.17 k

Notes: I don’t know why namjoon’s turned emotional but it did, I guess I wanted to show the emotional side/connection that the imprint bond brings in the relationship. Also, in this on yoongi’s and hobi’s part, I tried to dabble in the d/s theme a little bit… I hope that is okay? I’m trying to expand my writing a little bit!!

Kim Seokjin:

Too be honest, and you are saying this with all of your heart, your boyfriend, or imprint, is one of the most extra person ever.

And also, one of the sassiest person, or werewolf (besides Jungkook and Taehyung), ever.

It is very entertaining though, especially when someone pushes his buttons when it comes to cooking, sense of humor, or and most especially, you. When someone, especially women with no boundaries, he is defending you until his death. There are times when certain, rude, women try to flirt with Seokjin (because have you seen the man?), and they purposely try and act that you are not even there. So, Seokjin, being himself, brings you into the conversation.

And that is one the one thing that you love about the man, he makes sure and puts his paw down by showing you off to that woman.

An example would be right now.

The pack and the imprints are at the local bar, or night club, and are enjoying the Friday night that Namjoon had allowed due to the victory of defeating the newborn packs with the Cullen’s. Everyone is dancing with their imprint and are having a blast, but you and Seokjin are relaxing at the bar, not feeling the dancing spirit like everyone else is. You are cozied up into Seokjin’s side, loving the protectiveness and warmth that only wolves and their imprints get with one another. It is very peaceful and nice, especially with the two young ones making a scene by dancing like idiots and having dance offs with one another. The looks that both of their imprints are making to one another is having you giggling, the look of embarrassment that is mixed with adoration warms your heart.

“Well, you look lonely,” a woman’s voice purred, knocking you out of your thoughts.

Shifting in your boyfriend’s embrace, the first that you see is a older woman, who in your opinion is beautiful, is ogling your boyfriend, clearly ignoring his hold on your waist (which is now gripping it).

“I’m clearly not,” Seokjin commented, his tone is as if he is talking to a peasant. “If you have not noticed, I am with my lady,” Seokjin spoke, making you blush.

“Well, she is not that entertaining since you seem bored. I think I can help you with that boredom,” shocking you to the core due to her insinuation. You cannot believe she just said that with you standing right in front of her.

Seokjin right away sensed your discomfort and down mood, knowing that you want to speak up but cannot due to your anxiety. Sighing, “It is a shame that some women do not follow the girl code…” he began, “But also have, you need to realize that throwing yourself at someone does not look good on you, sweetheart, desperate does not suit you.” And with that, Seokjin grabbed your hand, pulling you towards the other end of the bar, “Come on, love, let’s go someplace else.”

You still think that you do not deserve Seokjin, and as if hearing your thoughts, Seokjin squeezed your hand a little harder, and pressed a kiss to your forehead. And that is all of the confirmation and comfort that you needed.

Min Yoongi:

Some people found it very adorable on the dynamic that you and Min Yoongi, your imprint and werewolf boyfriend, had. It was never a bad view on your relationship, in fact, it was the best view that you believe people had on it.

To the outside world, Min Yoongi was the cold, reserved, grumpy, or in Stiles Stilinkie’s term, “sour wolf,” person. The reason why people viewed this is because they can never see the adoring smile that he held for you out in public, but you can see it and the pack can see it. Yes, it may look like a blank face, but only those who know him can see the twitch at the corner of his lips and the head-over-heels look in his eyes.

“Please?” You whined, pouting at your boyfriend in the candy store at the mall, wanting to get some more snacks.

“No.” Your boyfriend grunted out, trying to not fall into the trap of giving into your adorable puppy (lol) eyes.

Stomping your foot, earning a look from your boyfriend, “But why?” You asked in a cute, whiny, tone that made Yoongi melt along with his wolf.

But, not liking the stomping of the foot that you made, he gave you a daring look. “Don’t stomp your foot at me, princess.”

Looking down at your feet, you slumped your shoulders, realizing that you were not able to get candy because of the orthodontist explaining that you have been having too many sweets, especially with your braces, and that you need to cut back on them. But! In your defense, you have another four months that you will not see them, so you can start cutting back on next Monday! Knowing that your boyfriend is very protective and always is very concerned for your well-being, he takes these kinds of things very seriously – even having a nightly flossing schedule that you both do every night.

Hearing the defeated sigh that held sadness with it, both Yoongi and his wolf can not and will not stand the thought of knowing how devastated you are. Sighing himself, Yoongi wrapped his arms around your shoulders, pulling you into his chest and pressed several kisses that earned your giggle, a sound that brought joy to him and his wolf. “You can have a little bit of candy, but this should last you several weeks because we cannot have you sick off of candy and running around like a hyper bunny.” Yoongi bargained, a bargain that you agreed to and happily chose the candy that you wanted.

Yoongi only forgot that a little to you is three bags of candy – he just could not be mad.

Jung Hoseok:

One thing that the pack was for sure about when it came to Hoseok whenever you were not near him, was that he was constantly texting you. Now, this did not upset them at all, in fact, they were happy to see their hot headed, angry, but caring pack member happy. When you and Hoseok first met, they knew that it was going to be a long journey of finding your guys meeting points. But, the whole time it was worth it because they got to see their brother become a better person and a happier person.

Anyways, Hoseok was currently texting you, a small smile on his face, but a serious expression apparent. Everyone was out at the beach, a bonfire put on by the maknae line, wanting a fun Saturday night. You were showing up with your cousin, inviting her with you to the groups hangout since she was in town for the next few days. You felt your phone buzzing with texts from your boyfriend, the feeling of your heart doing flips with just the thought of your lover. Pulling out your phone, you smiled at the message.

Hobi: when will you be here? I miss youuu

Smiling at the sentiment, the one thing that Hoseok will ever show you and not anyone else. He only acts like a whiny puppy with you, always wanting to keep his cool front on in front of everyone else. But you have began to notice that he has started to let his walls come down in front of his pack.

You: almost there! I cant wait to see you!!

When you and your cousin showed up at the bonfire, the first thing that your cousin noticed was that the man who had a stony expression and a powerful aura surrounding him that screamed danger stood up from the chair, making their way to you. She could see the way your body lit up, smile shining so brightly that it made her smile also. The look of love and adoration was what surprised her when she saw it shine on the males face.

Ah, that is the Hoseok that you were talking about.

When Hoseok reached you, he brought you into a short, but sweet kiss. The both of you did not want to pull away, but having respect and liking to keep that part of your life to yourselves anyways. Hoseok wrapped an arm around your shoulders, pulling you into his side protectively before realizing that he has yet to meet the cousin you have been talking about for the past week.

“Oh!” You gasped, bringing Hoseok’s attention solely to you (as if it was not already on you). “Hobi! This is my cousin, Linda! She’s the one I’ve been telling you about! Linda! This is Hoseok, my boyfriend!” You introduced the two happily.

Linda could see the smile that was brought onto Hoseok’s face so easily, jealousy slightly burning at that. She wished for something like you and Hoseok, especially from everything that you had told her about. She knew that Hoseok took great care of you.

“It is nice to meet you, Hoseok.” Linda spoke kindly, smiling at him.

Nodding his head, a kind small smile on his face. “You too, miss.”

“Let’s get food! Linda! Come, come!” You made sure to not leave your cousin alone since she is new here. “Hobi! We forgot an extra chair. Is there one that we can borrow for Linda?”

Not giving it another thought, Hoseok leant down and kissed your forehead before taking off to find a chair. As if on a mission to find gold, Linda watched your boyfriend search for a chair, realizing that you, his girlfriend, did not realize how your boyfriend would fight through hell if it meant to make you happy.

You truly are the luckiest girl, ever.

Kim Namjoon:

If there is one thing that Namjoon is for sure about, it is knowing you like the back of his hand. Now, he is not saying this just to say it, he is saying it because it is true. Ever since he met you at the farmer’s market, accidentally bumping into you, he has observed you every minute that he is with you. He knows your little quirks, your dislikes and likes, wants, and your favorite terms. He knows that you hate burning hot chocolate milk, so he makes sure it has cool down just enough to still be warm, but cool enough to where you have to blown on it to where it is not burning your tongue.

Another thing that he knows is that you have moments where you are completely down. It is as if a switch got switched off, making you completely emotionally vulnerable, the one thing that you are needing is comfort and his attention – but you hate asking for help. You are completely stubborn, hating to ask for comfort and his time because you know that he is busy with the pack. But, what you do know is that Namjoon knows when these times happen. They happen once you are completely happy, having no worries in the world, but once you get home, you shut down because you believe that you do not deserve happiness. Why? Because in your past, every time you had a good day, or feel happy, and something snatches it from you. Something like a text from a friend that sounds mad, but you know in the back of your head that you cannot read emotions over text. Or, your mother snapping at you for something that was out of reach. It has, and Namjoon knows that this will always happen, but that is okay, because he knows you and he loves you.

So, once you opened the door from a night out with your friends, Namjoon can sense the sudden wave of sadness from you. He could feel it once you left the bar, a imprint bond perk that he loves so he knows what to do, and he could feel your distress from a mile away. The distress being your questioning of whether or not you deserve happiness. And as you are taking off your heels, Namjoon comes up behind you, helping you take them off by kneeling down and unzipping them for you.

You stare down at your boyfriend with tears forming in your eyes, suddenly crying, but Namjoon this from your heartbeat beating a little faster. Standing up, Namjoon wraps his arms around your waist, pulling you into him, the both of you relaxing at the touch of one another. Breaking down, you clutched onto him tightly, fearing that he will disappear on you.

“I don’t know what happened, everything was perfect and I had a good time—” you were cut off by your sobs, face nuzzling into his neck, the familiar sent of him helping you calm down.

“I know baby, I know. It is okay, I’m here, I’m not leaving beautiful.” He promised, kissing you the side of your head. “You’re okay, you’re okay.”

304 notes · View notes

xtodorcki · 3 years

Note

this just a suggestion heheh so you don't have to feel that you need to do it 🥰🥰 scenario is jean and reader on and off relationship, the reader is insecure because jean's ex before the reader is so pretty and the reader doesn't feel like they don't deserve jean so for the last time they broke it off and jean being angry and not understanding the reader's point of view decided to make the reader jealous by having a fake relationship with the said ex, now the reader is very devastated, crying most of the time, not leaving the bed etc. connie and sasha were the ones comforting reader and one day both of them decided its enough and confronted jean, now jean felt guilty and all that jazz so reader and jean decided to talk and then boom back together and for good this time. I really cant handle angst on its own so i have to make it angst to fluff 😁😁

“Back & Forth,” Jean x Reader

Summary: having an on and off relationship with Jean because of your insecurities, when you decide to break it off a final time- he practically uses your insecurities to make you jealous.

Warnings: none, angst to fluff

The relationship between you and Jean was never easy or smooth. There were a lot of rocky days and stable days, kinda like a roller coaster. Some days were really good and memorable to you and some days were just plain awful.

Every time you two would bicker, it would always lead to a much bigger argument and eventually a break up for a few days then poof, you’re back in his bed or he’s back in yours.

It was a repeated cycle for over a year and working beside him in the scouts didn’t make things easier on the both of you- in fact it added a lot more stress to the relationship that was barely hanging on by a thread.

You’ll admit that your insecurities and fears did play a massive role in the arguments. You were terrified of losing him, of him losing interest in you and going off to find someone better.

You hated yourself for thinking such thoughts but knowing who his ex was and how his ex looks- you were fully convinced that he had downgraded with you and is going to figure that out eventually and leave you.

Jean was pretty oblivious to your feelings and how insecure you were, mainly because you were too afraid to tell him and also because he was an idiot- he can’t figure things out even if it was right in front of his face.

So the arguments continued, the break ups and make ups continued for months until one of the days you both were more frustrated than usual. You can sense the anger dripping off him and radiating towards you that it kinda scared you a bit.

The argument was a small stupid one that led to him raising his voice at you and making you feel small. He was never the type to hurt your feelings or make you feel like shit during an argument, he usually just made smart ass remarks and then leave you be for a few days then come back.

But this time he was more angry with you to the point where he had startled you from shouting. You couldn’t tell where all the sudden anger came from and you truly felt as if it was all your fault for making him raise his voice.

You tried to hold back your tears and your emotions, you hated to be vulnerable in front of him and since he was pissed off and stomping around the room, you had just decided to grab some of your things you had in his bedroom.

“Where are you going?” He asked even though he knew, it was always the same toxic behavior between the both of you.

“I’m done this time, Jean. I’m not coming back.” You simply said, quickly walking out of his room before he could say anything.

The stabbing pain in his heart had instantly stunned him, making him stare at the bedroom door you walked out of and everything came rushing to his head. The realization had hit him pretty hard and all it did was feed into his anger, making it worse than before.

He couldn’t believe you would easily give up on the relationship you two have built for over a year, he felt as if you never really loved him and it only made him more upset and that resulted in him punching a hole into the wall.

A week had passed, you mainly stayed inside the room you had on the scouts base- you barely would leave. You wouldn’t go to training sessions, wouldn’t go on missions, wouldn’t do anything. All you did was lay in bed and cried, the overwhelming pain pinning you down on your bed, preventing you from moving.

But the one day you had decided to come out and grab something to eat before heading back to your room, Jean sat in the mess hall with his arm around someone’s shoulder. At first, you couldn’t make out who it was until they had turned their head- it was his ex.

“Hey, Y/N.” Connie had called out to you but you had stood there emotionless until Jean had turned to meet your gaze.

The way your heart had dropped all the way down to your stomach, your worst nightmare coming to life right in front of you. You were quick to turn around and head back to your room before the tears could slip from your eyes.

Jean had watched you walk away, he was hoping that the little jealousy plan he was doing was working in his favor. He had missed you way too much to the point where his dumb brain had tricked him into thinking that bringing his ex here could make you jealous and come back to him.

But of course men aren’t that entirely smart when it comes to dating.

Jean had no idea that you sat in your room crying and having the heavy amount of your insecurities weighing down on you. He couldn’t see the fact that you were hurting way more than he was and all you wanted was for him to grow up.

He watched Sasha and Connie follow after you, making sure to bring you a plate of food from today’s lunch, wanting to make sure you were okay and fed.

“Can we come in?” Sasha spoke on the other side of the door, making you quickly wipe the tears off your cheeks and unlock the door for them.

But when they both saw you, they could tell you were crying from how red your eyes were and the way your cheeks were flushed but they decided not to bring that up. Instead they walked inside and all three of you sat on your bed.

“Wanna talk about it?” She mumbled towards you, setting the plate down in your lap and you glanced down at it, not knowing what to really say.

“Is it Jean?” Connie chimed in, watching you play around with the food on your plate with a fork.

All three of you were pretty close so it was obvious for the both of them to know that it was Jean and the relationship you two had. They knew you were beating yourself up over it and they knew that the sight of Jean with the ex he swore he didn’t like anymore, was a lot for you to handle.

“I just don’t feel good enough when it comes to him. His ex is everything that I’m not and it’s obvious that I will never be enough or better than they are.” You managed to choke out, making Connie shake his head repeatedly.

“No, you’re better. They’re nothing compared to you, Y/N and if Jean can’t see that then he’s clearly an idiot.” He tried to reassure you but in the back of your mind, you were set on not being enough for him.

“I love him more than anything, it hurts to not have him here.”

They both stared at you and realized just how much you have been suffering up in your room on your own. They can tell just how much Jean meant to you and that only irritated them more to know he sat outside in the mess hall, acting as if you never existed or never mattered to him.

Sasha sighed, reaching over to embrace you in a hug and soon Connie had joined in. It had made you feel somewhat better, just to know you had people who cared about you but it didn’t help the fact that Jean wasn’t here comforting you like he should be.

“We’ll leave you to eat but I’m coming back later for dinner and you’re coming to eat with us, okay?” She told you, making you somewhat nod your head even though you weren’t sure if you’ll be able to even leave your room now that he was out there with his ex.

When they both left their room, they agreed to one another that Jean needed to be put in his place and Connie had even thought about punching him in the face even though he was also his best friend. They were both furious with him and the way he had made you feel and the way he had easily tried to move on with the ex you were insecure about.

Connie had managed to yank him away from his ex, dragging him in the hall where Sasha waited. The both of them giving him a intense look.

“What the fuck is wrong with you?” Connie spoke first, his eyebrows furrowed together and the skin on his face getting hot.

“What did I do?” Jean scoffed, looking between the both of them confused.

“You know what you did, why would you bring your ex here knowing Y/N is still upset over the breakup?”

“Since when was Y/N upset? They broke up with me.”

“Didn’t it cross your little brain on why they did all of that? Or are you too dumb to realize their feelings?” Connie was being a bit more harsh than usual but he cared about the both of you deeply, he knew he had to do something at least.

“Look, the only reason why everything happened the way they did is because Y/N feels very low and not enough, comparing themselves to your ex, convinced they can’t be enough for you.” Sasha sighed, pinching the bridge of her nose.

Jean had stood there, in shock almost as everything finally came to his head and everything had finally hit him like a ton of bricks. He hated himself for not seeing it sooner but having Sasha bring it up in a better way than Connie- it made him see all the signs that he didn’t see before.

He didn’t have any ounce of emotion or attraction towards his ex and the dumb decision he made to bring them here to make you jealous and come back to him, it made him feel even more stupid for making the wound in your heart bigger.

He didn’t know what to say to his two friends that stood in front of him, instead he dismissed himself and walked down the hallway towards your bedroom. He was racking his brain, trying to form the right words to say to you.

He didn’t want to screw things up with you, you meant everything to him and the way his heart raced inside of his chest as he stood outside your door. It had taken him a few minutes before bringing his fist up to knock on your door.

In your head, you were convinced that maybe it was Connie or Sasha returning back to your room like they said they were going to do earlier but when you opened up the door and moved your eyes up to meet Jean’s sad gaze, making your heart stop.

“What are you doing here?”

“Uh, can we talk? If not I can go.” He stuttered out, the nerves kicking in and the fear of being fear of being rejected.

At first it had crossed your mind to shut the door in his face because at the top of your head was the repeating image of him out in the mess hall with his ex but deep in your heart you had too much love for Jean and you couldn’t handle ignoring him and telling him to go.

Instead you had opened the door wider, letting him step inside and both sat on the small couch you had in your room. There was an awkward silence at first, after all that thinking on the way here he still didn’t know what to say to you to make things right.

“I’m sorry if I hurt you.” He started to say, his eyes trailing off and moving back to look down at you.

“It wasn’t my intention to make you leave that day and I really hate when we argue and break up all the time.” He sighed under his breath, his hand reaching back to scratch the back of his neck as he tried to form good enough sentences in his head before repeating them out loud.

“I don’t want us to continue to be toxic like that, you mean everything to me and I don’t want to lose you.”

“And what about you being with your ex?” You questioned, his sad eyes meeting yours and he simply shrugged his shoulders.

“I did it to make you jealous. It was a stupid idea because I felt like you were happier without me and I just wanted you to come back.” He admitted everything, the dumb plan to get you back failed miserably and now he was here trying to pick up your broken pieces again.

“You’re an idiot if you thought that was going to work.”

“I know I know, I couldn’t see that you were hurt. I never meant to try to replace you or make it seem like my ex is better because they’re not. You’re the only person I want to be with and the only person I’m in love with. You are the best thing that’s ever happened to me, Y/N and I mean that.” Jean confessed the bottled up feelings he’s been having for a while now.

Sometimes he was just never good with confrontation or admitting how he feels but as he sat there in front of you, the heavy amount of guilt weighing down on him for making you feel upset and insecure about the ex he never liked or wanted in the first place.

“Jean..” You trailed off, you didn’t really know what to say because you were just as bad at confessing feelings and emotions. You didn’t want to admit the fact that you’re self conscious and not confident enough.

“I know that you don’t feel good enough or have any confidence in yourself but trust me when I say this, there is nobody else that makes me feel the way that you do. I wouldn’t trade you for the world.” He kept going, the rush of words slipping off his tongue with ease right when they came to his mind.

He would sit there and talk about you all day and all the little things he loved about you. He never wanted to lose you and he wished that he stopped himself from being so stupid and selfish months ago. He hated to think back on the arguments and how he let those stupid fights separate you and make you feel not enough for him.

“I don’t want to lose you.” He finished off his rambling, his large hands hesitating but eventually reaching over to grab a hold on yours and you let him.

The way your heart had felt heavy at the sight of his face and now all you felt was it flutter with such love for him. You never understood how you ended up having Jean, you never seen yourself one to be this deserving of good things but he made you feel the opposite, he made you feel worthy of good things.

“I’m sorry for leaving.” You finally apologized after being zoned out in your endless thoughts and he simply shook his head.

“No, I’m sorry for not listening to your insecurities and feelings sooner.” He sighed, his hand reaching up to caress your cheek while still feeling the intense amount of guilt hang on him.

All he ever wanted was for you to feel loved and wanted and he hoped he made you feel that way but he also couldn’t help the burden of not listening to your feelings even if you never mentioned them out loud, it was pretty easy to see when you were feeling low or upset and he never acknowledged it as much as he should have and for that, it really hurt him.

His thumb had stroked soft circles on your cheek, staring down at you with sad eyes but seeing the small smile on your face had made him a bit more happier. He squeezed your hand before leaning over to plant a few quick kisses to your lips before fully pressing them against yours. The kiss was slow and soft yet passionate and full of sparks, something you missed a little too much.

When he pulled back to look down at you fully, his fingers had moved back to tangle in your hair before you moved yourself to wrap your arms around him and embrace him in a tight hug. You had missed him everyday while you sat inside of this room alone and he had felt the same when he laid in his empty bed late at night.

You meant everything to him and now he would do anything to keep you happy and in place, no more small breakups and no more sadness- he just wanted you to feel good enough again.

This took way longer than it needed to.

I’m sorry for the lag and the constant “sorry and ty for your patience” status. I was doing good until just recently when I experienced a loss in the family. even if it was just a family pet, she meant everything to me and has been around for more than a decade. Its been really fucking hard but I’m managing.

Ty always for the love! Send in some more requests for Armin, Jean or Eren. I love writing about them🥰

• Main Masterlist •

• AOT Masterlist •

READ BIO before requesting!

#jean kirstein imagine #jean kirstein x reader #jean kirstein headcanon #jean imagines #jean imagine #jean x reader #jean fanfic #jean headcanons #jean kirchstein imagines #jean kirchstein fanfic #jean kitchstein headcanons #aot headcanons #aot imagines

134 notes · View notes

bridgyrose · 3 years

Note

Heya, it been awhile XD

As always, I've been enjoying your fluffy snippets, but if you're up for some angst...

Ruby is a newly graduated Huntress following up on a child trafficking ring in Mistral m, which ends up taking her to Atlas. There she stays at 'The Glass Unicorn' and meets a maid called 'Cinder'. A woman who has long given up on her freedom and what it means to be a Huntress...

Otherwise, if you're still enjoying the fluffy side of things, some fluffy BeesSchnees is always good XD

Ruby sighed as she looked between a paper in her hand and to the hotel standing in front of her. For a moment, she was a bit confused on what The Glass Unicorn had to do with any sort of child trafficking ring. However, the name of the woman who owned this place came up more than once on the ledgers of that old barn. And if she wanted answers, she was going to need to start her.

Rain started to pour from the sky as Ruby walked into the hotel, pausing for a moment as she felt out of place. Sure, there were hunters and huntresses from all over, but even for Atlas standards, this place was higher end. Everywhere she looked, all she saw was an excuse for wealth to be displayed. Once she regained her composure, she walked up to the front desk. “I need a room.”

The blonde woman looked Ruby over for a moment before noticing it was a huntress in front of her. With a few quick clicks on her keyboard, a card popped out of her computer. “Room 402. Meals will be brought straight to your room. And dont bother talking to the staff.”

Ruby looked at her curiously as she took the card. “Why not?”

The woman looked directly into Ruby’s eyes. “Its not their job to talk to anyone.”

Ruby sighed and put the card in her pocket, turning to start heading up the stairs. She looked around as she walked, all the patrons seeming to enjoy everything the hotel offered. It all reminded her of why she was doing this: to try to make the world a better place. And right now, Atlas was not that better place.

Ruby watched a few of the staff bring out meals to the patrons, along with anything else they needed or cleaned up any messes that were made. The longer she watched, the less convinced she became that this hotel was going to be the link to this ring. Everything she found always became a dead end and this last lead of hers seemed to be no different.

“What do you think you’re doing?!”

Ruby looked up at the third floor, watching one of the patrons yelling at one of the maids. She tried to get a better look, making her way to the stairs on the opposite side as she watched the maid drop to the ground to pick up the food that fell on the ground.

“I’m sorry, I didnt mean to-”

“Didnt mean to what? Give lousy service?” The patron spat at the maid, pushing past her and knocking her over. “Lousy maid bringing over half cooked food…”

Ruby watched the maid move her hair out of her face as she started to scrub, hearing a small sigh escape from the girl. She felt sorry for the girl, walking over to her. “Ah… miss… I was hoping I could ask you something.”

The maid didnt look up, seemingly avoiding eye contact with Ruby. “I-I’ll make sure your room is cleaned once I’m finished here.”

Ruby knelt down and picked up some of the fruit that had spilled. “That’s not what I was going to ask about. I was hoping you might be able to answer a few questions I have about this place.”

The maid stopped and slowly looked up at Ruby with tired eyes. “Y-you’re a huntress…”

“I am. What is your name?”

“Cinder.”

Ruby smiled and extended a hand to Cinder. “It’s nice to meet you.”

Cinder smiled for a moment, then it quickly disappeared as she quickly started to work again, keeping her head low. “I’m… I’m not allowed to talk to you. Please, go to your room and I’ll bring you your meal.”

Ruby was about to speak until she heard a voice coming from behind her.

“Cinder, you’re needed in the kitchen.”

Ruby watched as Cinder stood up and started hurrying off past her, making her way downstairs. “Do your staff always get treated like this?”

The woman from the front desk stood behind Ruby, shaking her head. “Only that one. She’s a bit of a… problem. The only reason I dont fire her is because she’s one of my daughters. She knows she’s only to be seen, not heard. I’ll make sure she wont bother you again.”

Ruby watched the woman turn around and head back downstairs towards the kitchen after Cinder. At this rate, even if this ended up as a dead end with the trafficking ring, then maybe there was something else that she could fix.

-----------------------------------------------------------------------------------------

Cinder winced a bit as she brought a tray to room 402, doing her best to keep from moving the collar that was around her neck. Everytime she messed up, all she could feel was that familiar sting. And every time, it hurt. She adjusted a small cloth she had around her neck, hiding the scars from the collar. She quietly knocked on the door, praying that whoever was in this room wasnt going to treat her like the rest of the patrons did.

Ruby slowly opened the door and smiled a bit at Cinder. “I was wondering when you’d come around.”

Cinder looked away a bit, holding out a tray to Ruby and staying quiet. The pain from her last punishment still lingered around, and she was terrified to be caught talking to anyone now.

Ruby noticed and sighed, taking the tray. “If you’re not going to talk right now, then maybe you can help me out with a few things in my room. There’s a few spots that could use a bit of cleaning.”

Cinder nodded and slowly walked into the room, pausing once she saw Ruby’s weapon laying down on a table. It wasnt the first time she had seen a hunter’s weapon within easy grabbing, and wasnt the first time she had the desire to reach out for it.

Ruby noticed and walked over, picking up her weapon and smiling a bit. “Like weapons too? You can hold her if you’d like.”

Cinder hesitated for a moment, wanting to reach towards the weapon. She stopped half way and sighed and she pulled her hand back. “I… cant.”

“Why not?”

Cinder didnt answer, looking away from Ruby. She didnt know how to tell a huntress that she had to get away from her family. That she’d do anything if it meant not being with them anymore.

Ruby sighed and sat Crescent Rose down. “You… wanted to be a huntress at one point, didnt you?”

Cinder froze on the spot. The thought had occurred to her, and there was that one huntsman, Rhodes, who taught her a few things, but he disappeared when she was younger. “Y-yes… but its… more than that…”

“I’m not sure I understand.”

Cinder looked around nervously before pulling down the cloth around her neck and pulling up the sleeves of her outfit. Scars lined her wrists while one scar circled her neck exactly where her necklace, the collar she wore, sat.

Ruby frowned when she saw the scars on Cinder, picking up her weapon and heading out of the room. “Stay here.”

Cinder nodded and sat down, terrified about what was going to happen. She had spent years trying to figure out how to get away from the madam, but all of her attempts at obtaining a weapon to get away had failed. And now, an actual huntress had seen the marks that had been left, the reminders of each of her failures on running away, each mistake she had made while working.

It wasnt long before Cinder heard muffled shouts from outside the room, her sisters and the madam clearly angry at Ruby. She cowered a bit, thinking she knew exactly what to expect: Ruby was going to let the madam in just like everyone else. She’d believe the lies that were told, that she was a troubled child that was taken in by the gratitude of the madam’s heart, that she was a thief and a liar that everyone had to keep an eye on. Even after the shouts died down, she still waited, flinching as she watched the door open.

Ruby rushed into the room, blood dripping from her scythe as she grabbed her things. “Cinder, you’re coming with me.”

Cinder felt a bit confused, hesitating for a moment. “You… want me to come with you?”

“Well, currently you’re unemployed and have nowhere to go. You can either stay here in Atlas, maybe find your way down to Mantle and find a job, or you can come with me and I can help you become a huntress. I can at least teach you how to defend yourself and others from the grimm, maybe even help you take the exam for your hunter’s license. Give you a new start.”

Cinder was still a bit confused, but followed after Ruby, pausing as she saw the madam laying on the ground in a pool of her own blood. “You killed her…”

Ruby sighed as she kept walking. “She attacked me first. I thought all of this was going to be a dead end, but it seems like I ended up on the right track after all. I know you were bought through a child trafficking ring, and I know you’re not the only one she had purchased. If you can help me get a bit more proof, I think I can put an end to this. I know its a bit late and there isnt much I can do about what had happened to you, but I can at least help you with your new freedom now.”

Cinder sped up to catch up to Ruby, sticking close to her. “But why help me? I’m… I’m just a nobody. A kid that was sold into this life. I dont deserve any kindness.”

“Because if I cant help someone, then what’s the point of being a huntress?” Ruby stopped for a moment, pulling out her scroll and holding it up to Cinder to take a picture. “And besides, the world is already cruel enough. I think its time we try to make it a better place.”

#ruby rose #rwby ruby rose #cinder fall #drabbles #angst #angsty drabbles #self harm #tw self harm

55 notes · View notes

youranxiousnerd · 3 years

Text

Showtime Thoughts

bc i am in love with julia lester

spoilers below

First off, why is this episode so short?

ngl i forgot mazzara was a regular

ricky ded besties

awww nina and the letters

she looks very good in her dress

ashlyn and ricky look so good

“We’re screwed!”

ash and ricky are too funny like where were they this season?

chaotic and pretty best friends

sidenote, why did they go see north high’s production?

oh my god ricky and nina are talking

SEBLOS IN THE BACKGROUND

i am taking what i can get

RICKYS FACE WITH THE CARD!!!!!!!!

my favorite part of the episode

his makeup looks very good

he looks very good

as @organic-guacamole said, he is very pretty

its been like three minutes and it already is so chaotic

yessss kourtney’s mom!!!

so howie and kourt are fine? gah since when?

“look for the shortest fork” mood

I CANNOT TAKE EJ SERIOUSLY HE LOOKS LIKE AN ANGRY BIRD

big bird ej comin at you

PORTWELL DATE

wait isnt this ejs last show? is he going to miss his last afterparty for a date?

true love bitches

GINA MY LOVE

“Is he with us?”

NORTH HIGH SET OUR BEST BOI ANTOINE ON FIRE APS GET READY

seb being a supportive boyfriend is everything i needed

jenny is frazzled

i love how all the techie turned actors are nervous at some point during the episode

REDLYN CONTENT

awww thats so cute love the callback!!!

ooo howie is here

love how the writers leave a cliffhanger and then close the book before it turns to tragedy with one line

mazzara and ej, thats it

jenn what

why is mike there?

that was so unnecessary like aren’t mike and jenn over?

LILY

“did we forget to build a moat around the school”

let ricky be single challenge

she just said “lol” i cant

props to ricky for keeping calm during the show after he saw mike and jenn

ah so lily is a child of divorce?

“lily scram”

RICKY AFTER THE CURTAIN OPENS WHY IS THIS FUNNY

STOP MAZZARA IS THE VOICE OVER

HE SOUNDS REALLY GOOD

how did ricky do that so fast-

put on gloves over the cast, makeup, and a mask?

i dont work with costumes

AMERICA EXPLAIN

The one scene we get from the show...

Yay Steph!!!!

“Big Red has not thrown up in twenty minutes” ashlyn’s little smile

“she heard wrong”

someone please explain how spotlighting the judge is a good idea it makes it seem like things went wrong

“Carlos is a seasoned professional” honey carlos is on the verge of a mental breakdown

“He says help

Communication

Seb translating for Carlos is beautiful dramatic, yes, but im right.

im so proud of them. they go from not talking for a week to seb being able to tell how carlos is feeling based off a stoic expression.

SOULMATE SHIT

IM SORRY NO BOP TO THE TOP CALLBACK

LIKE NONE

WHO WANTS TO RIOT WITH ME?!?!

wait so carlos goes from on the verge of a mental breakdown to full on performing and speaking?!?!?!? Speaking well too, not stumbling.

he looks so comfortable on stage when not even ten minutes ago he looked like he was going to vomit?

h e l p

ashlyn’s little laugh!

NINI IS A FORK IM LAUGHING THIS IS GREAT

big red lookin’ at his girl

ricky what are you doing?

ASHLYN AND GINA

I QUIT THEY’RE ADORABLE

GET IT KOURTNEY

howie’s little mouth drop

i cant with sebs costume i should not be laughing how is he able to do a kick line

ASHLYN MY LOVE

be our guest was enjoyable. it had a lot of moving parts. frankie and dara sounded really good. it’ll probably grow on me the more i listen to it.

is it just me or did be our guest lack some energy?

NATIALIE IS SO AGGRESSIVE

awww gina bb

portwell!!

“my mom sent me jordan fisher”

big red and ricky!!!

...what is big red doing? has he been faking sick?

“PLEASE EVERYONE REMAIN IN THE SAME ROLE YOU STARTED IN”

BEST LINE OF THE SEASON OMFG

alright what the hell is up with howie?!?

kourtney is so excited and then downer howie comes to ruin it

nina just write “thanks for being the best bro and glad youre not dead”

btw kourtney and gina look really good in their costumes

ASHLYN!!!!

SHES SO PRETTY THANK YOU

redlyn!!

gina and jamie!!!

he looks so proud

glad gina gets to see her family!

cute scene, jordan is a nice addition!

RICKY AND THE BOWL

julia lester is killing it with the vocals

big red is so in love

seb bouncing in the costume

“she’s never looked at me that way before” evil smirk

PORTWELL GLANCES

my heart fricking stopped when carlos went on stage

being early on your cue/missing is awful would highly not recommend

a bop to the top callback after this would have been perfect

those harmonies!!

THEYRE SO IN LOVE

ummm phone call?

CHIPS BIG SCENE

...why wasn’t seb cogsworth?

alright that was really good. everyone (even the backup) sounded really good. portwell rights! ashlyn rights! kowie rights! acting rights!

so mazzara and jamie?

Ashlyn is the perfect Belle fight me

“Eat it Zackey Roy!” how about “yay kiddos, nice job!”

ej’s little dance

“bc you’re ginas brother”

he is enamored by her it is adorable

EJ CASWELL RIGHTS

“hey, jordan fisher, would you like to f up one of three stableish ships in hsmtmts?” “sure, im in!”

ej!!!

aww hopefully he doesnt take the conversation too heart. they both like each other so much.

Portwell is so enjoyable to watch.

return of the bro

ej go get your girl dont worry about her brother please

SOMEONE TOUCHED THE PROPS

all hands on deck

“Can you just jump off something high”

I seem to remember Ricky falling from something high last episode, is that correct?

She tells this to one of her most UNSTABLE kids

Oh shit

Miss. Jenn

Wtf

like what the actually hell

look at the kids faces they’re heartbroken

Miss. Jenn why. You’re stressed about the show, but you’re not performing it. They are. They have to worry about lines and cues and pitches, not you. Miss. Jenn has literally gone at the kids this season. Opening night speech too Ash and Ricky, shutting Seb down, that comment. She has become obsessed with the Menkies and North High. It has gotten really bad. These kids have put everything into this show, even their relationships (both platonic and romantic) and that is how you repay them?

I didn’t think they would address this, I lost hope after last week but I am so glad they’re going too.

Someone send Seb after Miss. Jenn please, let him rip into her, he would do very well.

Miss. Jenn is supposed to be the role model and she just told a kid to jump off something high.

nina has been a godsend this episode, props to her!

haven’t been the biggest nini fan this season (off and on for me), but she was very behaved this episode.

if there is anything the east high kids are good at, it’s bullshitting their way out.

“aim for my face” character growth

I KNEW IT

LILY WHY HOW WHEN WHY

WTF THEY END THERE I CANNOT WITH CLIFF HANGERS

I liked the episode. Didn’t love it, but liked it. I really wish we got to see more acting, like we didn’t even see Big Red and E.J go on stage. Not even the iconic yellow dress. Some of the drama is so unnecessary, like why Mike and Jenn? What is with the Kourtney and Howie drama the writers insist on having, can’t they just be happy?

Besides the whole harness incident (burn that harness and mask it is causing so many problems) the production went very well, too well. This is East High we’re talking about.

Promo thoughts because what

oo they’re sneaking, maybe Big Red’s thingy

YES ASHLYN GETTING THE LOVE SHE DESERVES

oo Kowie confession?

portwell please be okay

what is up with carlos’ hair?

so seb, miss. jenn, and carlos scene? this has the potential to be very beautiful.

“It’s not over” not this again...

i’m thinking carlos and seb are going to talk to miss jenn.

Sidenote, if we do not get a good seblos scene I will riot.

Hopefully Miss. Jenn apologizes with a billion sorrys

rini you just broke up please dont get back together

im scared

if it is a scene where they close the book i will be very happy

Are we getting a flash forward scene? I’m pretty sure Miss. Jenn said Menkies aren’t till two plus weeks after the show.

We know based off the promo pics Ej and Gina are at the cast party, what went wrong?

Wait do we not get to see the finale of the show?

We better see the goddamn transformation

how does lily home and core four song fit in? im more curious about the lily one.

In conclusion, I am not ready for this to be over and the transformation needs to be sent to hell.

46 notes · View notes

wickedpact · 3 years

Note

You can't just drop that "I read Forces Multiplied" bomb on us and not give a ten page written reaction.

[cracks knuckles] if u insist

nicky cant drive hc: destroyed. rip. also i loved how andy and nile stole those sports cars and were being badass and driving off the bridge & meanwhile joe and nicky were just absolutely vibing in the van

'heres the thing about power: people who have it think they deserve it' [shot of police car] i see u greg

5 whole panels being dedicated to booker not being able to unlock his door. booker not even seeing noriko sitting RIGHT THERE in the window at first. incredible

noriko being 24/7 horny was surprising. like wow all of the stuff i saw she did out of context was 100% equally horny in context as it was out of context. love that for her

i didnt think the 'andy + slavery' thing was handled as badly as everyone made it out to be when telling me about it. tho from the way it was talked about i had kind of figured the conflict between andy and nile re: slavery would be really racially charged (esp considering nile is a black american and would obvs have Thoughts on the subject in that regard) but like,, done in a cringey 'a-white-guy-obviously-wrote-it' kind of way? but it wasnt that. i mean. it makes sense that andy would be implicit in slavery through the years

i mean, like she says, is that not what people just did to each other in the aftermath of battles for thousands of years? and i really like how its pointed out that it was what she was raised with (in the beginning when you see her put shackles on that guy after the battle) but she also accepts responsibility for it and acknowledges that it was wrong and not just 'what people did'.

i like how from her expressions you can kind of tell baby andy knew it was off but she sets those feelings aside bc she felt angry. it explains how she felt but didnt make her out to be blameless in it. plus i mean. i dont know, the fact that andy was involved in a lot of morally shady stuff for 7000 years is not that wild for me. if you live that long youre just Going to be involved in some shit, and she didnt even have other immortals with her as positive community influences, she literally just did whatever the fuck she wanted for thousands of years

'i was worshipped as a god once' i mean, yeah no shit she wouldve been involved in some seriously fucked up stuff, gods were fucking scary back in the day

tldr it could use some polish but it wasnt that bad

tho everything people said about moose being boring was unfortunately a little true. sorry king i tried to be interested in you

joe and nicky writing verbal fanfiction about nile and moose was iconic. 'you seeing that?' 'i am definitely seeing that'

it was also extremely funny bc that was like 60% of their contribution to the whole comic, besides kidnapping copley. they came, they wrote some fanfic, they left. kings. at least in tog1 they had an excuse to be useless bc they got kidnapped

joe just found out his old friend who he thought was dead is alive (and also probably wants to murder them) and instead of investigating with andy he stopped to help nile up. champ.

nicky shooting noriko through andy was cool. rip to the concept since it wont happen in tog2

wanna see mr ejiofor deliver this line

on that note imo copley was. weirdly enough, more interesting in fm than in tog1. to me at least. the fact that andy let him live and he was so haunted by what had happened that he came back and sought them out despite knowing they would likely kill him for it bc he wanted to not only make up for what hed done but also to tell them what theyd done for the world was admittedly more interesting than andy just kind of drafting him to the cause and him going 'okie'

i like how nicky was drawn in this one. in opening fire he looks like a blob man but in fm he looks more like a very nice grampa with a very good dye job

'theres no pain like a broken heart' andy 🥺

noriko implying andy's never drowned. .. .idk about that one, she musta drowned sometime

joe and nicky came, they waxed poetic about nile's love life, they waxed poetic about grog, and then they left.

sports bras being a reason humanity is good. i mean..... okay, yeah.

i mean. wild but you cant exactly tell her shes wrong

i liked how noriko telling andy that their purpose is to make people suffer coincides with joe and nicky finding out that they actually did good all those years

joenicky in opening fire: jail for booker jail for booker for 100 years

joenicky when copley tells them he knows where booker is: WE'LL KILL YOU WHERE IS HE

joenicky when copley comes back: if your vibes come off as even remotely rancid we Will destroy you

joenicky 2 minutes later when copley helped them find booker: he made up some ground :)))) <3 lov you j cops

theyre forgiving af

moose: how old are you?? a hundred??? a thousand???

nile [vine voice]: I M 2 7 ?

alright andy you got me there

joe texts like my aunt

i dont know why noriko drowning andy in that car tickled me. Bad And Naughty Andromaches Get Put In The Pear Wiggler To Atone For Their Crimes.

the drowning sequence was cool

copley trying to talk to andy while she was like o_o at him was great

ive hit the picture limit but id seen that panel where nicky goes 'forgive me' as he kills a guy out of context and it was HILARIOUSLY anticlimactic for me to discover that there was literally no context to it. nicky just apologizes to random people he kills. i thought that guy was someone he knew or something. nope its just Some Guy that nicky didnt know from adam

nile's complaint that andy was especially brutal to the guys on the boat... i mean. . , how exactly does one kill a man with an axe and not be brutal about it?

it was funny how noriko kissed andy and the only people who seemed surprised by that were nile and also andy

nicky and joe's complete non-reaction to finding out noriko is alive And Evil Now is endlesly funny. they just left her on that boat and neither cared. i get book and nile not caring but joe and nicky knew her, and they just have 0 input on the subject of what to do with her

pinstripe suit guy!

joe and nicky and booker packing up and leaving with nile

andy blowing up at nile was A Moment tho

i dont know, i get why people didnt like the ending but its. .. . it makes more sense in the comicverse. bc the squad doesnt really. .. interact outside of jobs? i mean, think of the moon landing story in ttt. that was booker and joe and nicky doing a job and andy only showed up a for a couple minutes after it was done. or the brunch in the first issue of opening fire. the squad arent as tight in the comic, and andy often seems to do her own thing outside of work, so andy saying 'i dont want to do work anymore' and the squad being like 'alright bye then' makes more sense in this universe than the movie one

also i feel like greg was Trying to set up a thing where nile becomes the Leader of The Squad after andy dies but like. its not very well done since. . . i mean, nile hasnt spoken to booker since opening fire, (and she only knew him A Day). and shes known joe and nicky all that time, but there isnt really anything that indicates that they have any relationship at all, much less one that's grown. in all the comicverse the only time nile and nicky speak is in FM, and in that scene nicky tells nile about noriko. nile goes from someone who needs to be set aside to have background knowledge explained to her to being the Leader of the group with nothing in between. it kind of... comes out of nowhere.

on the other hand tho... i felt really bad for andy thru the whole thing. well, i always felt bad for andy, but in this one she seemed so miserable, especially since it really felt like none of the others actually.... cared about her. when noriko came back no one asked andy how she was doing (big question ik, but it wouldve showed they cared at least), nobody ever expressed any concern for her, no one even really seemed to want to be around her. in opening fire everyone was more distant than in the movie of course, but there were little moments where she would joke with joe, or nicky would try and comfort her, or stuff like that, but in FM it really felt like they just didnt really care about her. & in opening fire it felt a lot like andy's relationship with nile breathed some new life into her, but in FM it felt like all they did was argue. i get theyre not *as* close in the comics but it really felt like the only person who cared about andy at all was noriko (which was probably also how andy felt) but it just seemed to come out of nowhere. honestly i was reading and i was honestly agreeing with andy that she might just be better off if she did just die. opening fire, on the other hand, never make me feel that way

tho everyone made it sound like when the squad split up it was one of those cursed 'the found family leaves each other at the end of the journey' tropes. but guys i mean,,, this is the second installment out of three. that isnt the End. theyll come back in the third one and Dramatically Reunite to fight some baddies (probably those 'others' noriko mentioned). im guessing yitzhak fits into that too somehow.

anyways it wasnt That Bad but it made me kind of sad and the only Sweet Found Family vibes in it were when they saved booker. also they shouldve beefed up that nilemoose romance, it underwhelmed me. 6.5/10

i also ABSOLUTELY understand all of greg's comments about how you couldnt make FM directly into a movie, he always said that it had no plot and. i get it now. it really didnt have a plot sdfghjkl

#nicoloalkaysani #it took me So Long to type this up #asdfghjk

22 notes · View notes

fairycosmos · 3 years

Note

hey, i have a sister who struggles with addiction. she moved out from our parents to my place when she turned 18, so that she could have some space and that her highs and lows wouldnt affect our younger siblings that much. but shes been going through a hard time for quite long now, which causes her to treat us around her like complete shit. her behaviour led into a pretty bad argument, which led to me driving her to our parents in the middle of the night cause i couldnt mentally or physically handle the shit she was giving me anymore. after that night, she never returned to mine and told our parents to pick her stuff and move it into a new apartment that she got for herself (which locates in the same building as her friends who she uses substances with). she hasnt reached out to me at all, even though we have been around each other and i cant bare to approach her either, cause im still upset and hurt. my mom said that shes already prepared to lose her. i heard from her friends that shes told them that if she goes unconscious, theyre not allowed to call the ambulance or try to help her. i am worried sick to my stomach everytime i think about her and i feel so powerless. my parents just say that theres nothing more we can do, she goes to psychotherapy and shes under the social services but still i feel like we should do something more to help her or to stop her from destroying herself. im so sorry if this message makes you feel uncomfortable, but since ive followed you for quite awhile and i know your experiences with these things, i would appreciate if you could help me with this situation or at least try to give me some advice, how to cope with these feelings that come from loving your sister that struggles. i dont want to lose her.

hey, i am so sorry to hear this. there's a lot i could say and a lot i want to say but can't really articulate. i don't think there's any one size fits all advice for such a complex and heartbreaking situation. i guess i'll begin with what i'm sure of, and that is that your boundaries and feelings are justified. addiction literally rewires your brain and perception of the world beyond recognition, to the point where the only thing the person cares about is their vice. it's just total tunnel vision, selfishness denial and violence on top of selfishness denial and violence. being around ppl like that, especially a loved one, is beyond exhausting, it's its own special kind of hell. like screaming at a brick wall. it's totally understandable that you had to take a step back after falling victim to her erratic, manipulative and abusive behaviour. the drug use explains it but it absolutely does not excuse it. you're really brave for putting your foot down and prioritizing your own mental stability when it all got to be too much. know you never have to regret that. having said that, it's possible for two conflicting feelings to coexist and for them both to be (for lack of a better word) valid. she's your sister - of course you're worried, of course you're terrified for her. of course you love her even while feeling like you hate her, at times. it's alright to let your emotions be illogical, to just weather the storm and let them pass through you. write it down, talk to your loved ones, maybe consider speaking to a therapist or hotline over it. it's perfectly normal to need that support and talking through your circumstances may be illuminating/lead to some personal revelations regarding how you want to approach this. ultimately, you're angry because you care. after a while i was like that too, with my sister. although i tried to let her know that i was more worried than frustrated during our conversations, sometimes i still couldn't help the internal rage. all because i wanted her to wake up to reality and for her to be okay - i didn't get her thought process at all, didn't get her version of the world. and i felt so fucking powerless because she just strayed so quickly from her path, despite what she was telling me, despite her being relatively fine mere months prior. despite us being best friends and on good terms. it's a headfuck, and you don't have to know what to do, you don't have to have anything figured out. just try to focus on what you need, today.

the hardest thing to accept is the fundamental truth of the situation, and that is that you can't fix this for her. can't love her out of it, can't enable her out of it, can't fight her out of it. all you can do is be there for her emotionally while still maintaining the appropriate boundaries necessary to preserve ur own mental wellbeing. it's completely okay if you need more time - i know you said you cant bear to reach out to her at the moment, which makes total sense. but since you sent this message and i can still see that you're beyond concerned and it's only getting worse, maybe you could consider calling her or sending her a text or meeting her for coffee when you're ready. just to let her know you haven't stopped thinking of her. and that you care about her so much, that when/if she's ready to get help you will be with her every step of the way. even if shes battling addiction for the rest of her life. if she screams at you, if she breaks down, if she ignores you for what you say - fine. but at least she'll know on some level that she is not alone, and at least you'll know you did what you could with what was in your control. also about her being under social services - is there any way you could get in touch with them, maybe explain that youre still worried about her and that you think she needs a higher level of care, maybe ask them if theres anything proactive you can do in collaboration with them to maximize the help shes getting? i dont know how it works where you are, that might be a no go, but i just thought i'd mention it. i'm sorry, i know it's a disappointing answer, but i really don't realistically think there's any other. there's only so much of this that is in your hands and so far it sounds like you've done and are doing everything possible to stay sane while looking out for her. i really really hope something clicks for her and that she starts to listen to you and her loved ones soon, that she begins to approach recovery out of the genuine need to get better. but it really does have to come from within her, all you can do is encourage it. im sending you both so much love. i know more than anyone how fucking stressful it is to have to wake up to this every day, and i'm so sorry. if you need someone to talk to, my inbox will always be open. you deserve peace in your own life, too. take care x

resource one

resource two

resource three

#tw addiction #tw drugs #anon #talking

25 notes · View notes

mcu-fan-fics-blog · 3 years

Text

The Helping Hand

This is a Repost from my Ao3 I wanted to bring it to Tumblr. I hope you like it Its currently 5 chapters I will be uploading the rest throughout the rest of the week.

Word count: 1660 approx

Summary: Y/N Krast Illegitimate Daughter of Tony Stark. Product of an unwanted teen pregnancy. What would Howard Stark be capable of doing to assure his sons future? What will happen when Tony meets our Beautiful, young, genius, rich philanthropist.

Tw: Implied/Referenced Child Abuse, Drug use, Drug addiction, Teen Pregnancy. (If there are any I missed please tell me.)

Introduction Ch.1

Ch.2

Back Story

(AU Howard and Maria Stark were not killed by the Winter Soldier.)

Your name is Y/N Krast First Born Daughter of Tony Stark. Sent away by Howard and Maria Stark. You being the result of an unwanted teen pregnancy. You don't know who your mother or father are. Howard Stark secretly kept in contact with you, until he passed.

Howard gave you a comfortable life and a bountiful trust fund that you gained access to on your 18th Birthday also the year he died. You are a Genius having finished college and high school at the same time with a master’s in Computer Engineering with a minor in Biology.

After Howards’ death, you were lost… you decided to help others. Thinking that maybe that would help you feel a semblance of happiness. You went to the one place you knew people needed help Sokovia.

You weren't there for long when you realized that you loved being there. The people and the culture were so welcoming and loving… at least towards you. The people definitely had their reservations, but you didn't mind.

You did as much as you could… you lived a simple life. Gave up the luxury in which you were raised and traded it for a small two-bedroom apartment that you shared with a friend who needed help with the rent. You opened a medical facility it was by no means the best but it could do the job.

You taught people basic medical procedures, not surgery… but everyday accidents and the occasional riot scene. Stitches and patch-up jobs.

"Hey, y/n what do you want me to do with these boxes here?" You look at him confused when you realize what he is holding.

"Umm… just leave them there I want to go through them before I leave." David gives you a fond look as he moves to sit next to you. "It's crazy to hear you say that… It seems like just yesterday you were that fresh-faced kid trying to help people."

You clear your throat as you see where the conversation is heading. "Don't go getting all sentimental on me… not now David." You give David a reassuring smile, but to your luck, he doesn't buy it. Now looking at you more seriously he says "Y/N it’s ok. We all understand why you're leaving, no one is mad or angry, just sad you will be missed around here."

You feel your eyes start to water and you quickly turn away from David trying to hide your tears to no avail. "It's just that I’m going to miss this too." He holds your shoulders and turns you to face him. He holds your face, the tears building in his own eyes, and pulls you into a hug.

"You will always be welcome back, you hear me. Now we are both going to stop crying on the count of 3… and were going to pretend that didn't just happen alright." You nod your head slowly agreeing to the terms you collect yourself. What David and you had is the closest thing either of you had to family. He pulled away slowly but determined.

"Okay, no more sad stuff alright… the town wants to throw you a going-away party. And you can't say no they just want to say goodbye." You sigh a smile slowly forming on your face and agree. After all, it had been two wonderful years in which you found yourself.

You are interrupted when you hear a knock at the door. It was rather startling but you've grown used to it by now. Shortly after the loud bangs, you called knocks you hear the door open and close. "How are my two favorite people in the world doing?"

Vivian or Viv for short. "Just peachy" you reply, hearing her laugh at your snarky reply. "I'm in my room and David went out to get things situated for the party."

"Oh well, I just came here to… well you know say goodbye. You are my best friend and I will not forget what you did for me and for my family."

You walk out of your room wearing black jeans and a leather jacket. "You know I would do it again in a heartbeat." Viv hums disapprovingly trying to play it off buy fails. "You see that's exactly what I'm afraid of. You jumped into that building because you didn't care if you did. As heroic as it might seem it was suicidal and we both know it."

You stumble looking for the words " I umm… I was there's no point in lying, but it's not like that anymore." She nods subtlely but you see it in her eyes she's relieved. You take the "out" and change the subject.

"Come on Viv lighten up it's my last night here and we're missing out on my own party." You nudge her and within seconds you get out of your apartment and into the streets that have seen you grow into the person you now are.

The party was more than you deserved… There were home-cooked meals and homemade desserts. People that you have grown to be acquainted with saying goodbye and wishing you luck. You can't help but thank them all sincerely. Once the party is over you head back home with David taking in the last of your stay here.

Once in your apartment you hesitate but end up calling David to your room. "I don't know if you noticed but I never unpacked this box. It was Howard's stuff." David's eyes open showing his surprise. "The Howard… why didn't you open it."

You sigh not knowing exactly why you didn't "Well we're opening it tonight." You make your way to the box and as if you were a wild animal you ravage the package open not realizing how much you actually wanted to open the box.

As you analyze the things in the box your eyes begin to water. There are pictures and mementos of your greatest moments stored in a single place. There's a picture of when you first met Howard you were 11. You chuckle lightly causing David to Burst out laughing. "I umm… I'm sorry but you were one ugly kid." You playfully slap his arm.

"I was, wasn't I. Howard saved me you know in this picture I had just gotten out of the worst foster home I'd ever been in." You'd never said much about your time in the system so David let you talk. "They would hit us, starve us, and some were even sexually assaulted."

David processes what you had just confessed to him realizing that it's probably not even half of what you've been through. "Howard was my saving grace… I was quite the ugly kid inside and out. I was a kid that had no hope in the world, but Howard changed that."

David collects his thoughts and says "I'd say he did a damn good job you brought hope to everyone here… you know kids here aspire to be like you… you are a great role model." You give him a sincere smile and give him a hug.

"David, I'm going to miss you, but it's time for me to go. Never doubt calling me for anything no matter how big or small. And I hope that you and Viv continue the work in the practice. Also, you know that Viv likes you, give her a chance. I don't want either of you to be alone… be alone together. Also she could help you with the rent of the place." Your say laughing. "Now go to bed and we'll leave early tomorrow."

David chuckles while leaving your room. When you hear his door close you continue looking through the things in the box.

Flashback

"Krast come downstairs there's someone here to see you." You jump up startled and cautiously make your way downstairs. You hear part of a conversation but don't invest yourself. You're too frightened when you get to where you heard voices there is a man standing there.

"Ah, you must be the young Y/N Krast. How are you, I'm Howard." You don't reply but rather look at Mr. Evans who nods ever so slightly giving you your cue. "I’m doing well." He's silent for a moment then continues "I hear you're quite the genius." You simply nod. When Mr. Evans decides to cut in rather tactlessly.

"Well, Mr. Howard is here to take you to a new home." You look at him incredulously then turning to Howard and asking him quite bluntly "Are you adopting me?"

Howard simply says "Not exactly, but you will have a family to care for you." The look in his eyes gives you some reassurance. That same afternoon he took you to "your new home."

You quickly find out what he meant by "Not exactly" while you were living in a better home, you were being raised by employees. Howard would come around every week a couple of times. You both enjoyed each other's company and quickly you grew fond of him.

"Y/N hurry up we're going to be late" Howard yelled "Yup im coming, you know if you'd given more than a couple hours heads up id be ready." Howard only chuckles and let that comment slide. You both knew that was a lie.

End Flashback

The morning went by rather quickly. Now you're on the tarmac waiting for your plane to arrive. David was holding your hand while neither of you mentioned it you could not have been more grateful.

"You go and kill em all. Alright I want to see you in a magazine or something. And don't forget to mention me as the greatest inspiration, your daily motivation, and the drive behind you."

You can only chuckle "Those aren't the words I would use to describe you but you are the best." You jug him and wave him off as you board your plane. You cant help but feel guilty as you're currently lying to everyone you care about, but there's no going back now.

#natasha x y/n #natasha romanoff #reader x avengers #avengers #tony stark #wanda maximoff #pietro maximoff #pepper potts #wanda x reader #steve rogers #fanfic #marvel #chapter

65 notes · View notes