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michwritesstuff · 4 months

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She’s Gonna Save Me (Bridgerton: Benedict Bridgerton)

this is my first ever bridgerton fic! i’ve had such a writer’s block and post grad has been so difficult but listening to music and reading other writers’ works has me feeling inspired! so enjoy my first story in months and first of the new year :)

pairing: female reader (she/her) x Benedict Bridgerton reader x Colin Bridgerton (platonic!)

summary: Benedict contemplates a life pursuing art and living outside the expectations of his family and society. Does he find a wife and settle down or live freely? What happens when he meets someone who can offer him the best of both worlds?

notes/warnings: mention of nudity, alcohol consumption, activities that can be witnessed at Sir Granville’s scandalous studio saoirees…

word count: 2.4k

As the second eldest Bridgerton boy, Benedict never found himself extremely pressured by the standards and expectations of society. Those responsibilities were entrusted upon his brother, Anthony, the Viscount.

Benedict reserved himself to a more romantic life, preoccupied by his love and interest for art.

Attending every event of the season was merely a ploy to keep his mother happy and distracted from the fact that he had no true intention of courting any ladies.

He would drink, laugh, and dance the season away without ever calling on anyone.

Benedict believed that this season wouldn’t be any different.

******

When you first agreed to join your family friends across the Atlantic in London, you didn’t expect that you would be taking part in the ton’s social season.

As the youngest daughter, your brothers married with children and sisters off tending to their new husbands, your father didn’t feel the need to arrange a marriage for social or monetary gain.

Your family was well off in the states, your parents often described as ‘free spirits.’ They had always impressed upon you the importance of appreciating the beauty around you and romanticizing life.

With your mother’s passing, you decided to stay at home with your father, choosing to enjoy a quiet life in the country studying English literature.

Staying with Sir Henry Granville was beyond exciting and allowed you to interact and mingle with the more eclectic members of British society.

You had lasted all but a week before you were called upon by a Miss Lady Danbury.

She had stressed the importance of participating in the social season and the impending judgment of the ton and Queen if you did not participate.

While you never cared much for the opinion of others, you didn’t fancy the idea of being ogled every time you ventured into town.

******

“I heard she was rejected by every suitor.”

“She’s so ugly and unpleasant, a dowry wouldn’t even be worth it.”

“Apparently she’s slightly deformed.”

You couldn’t begin to believe the rumors circulating about you, the American.

You swore that the descriptions were ripped out of a storybook, describing some gremlin crawling from the depths of the earth.

Men and women alike had no problem spreading stories about the young lady joining them for the season.

Worst of all, none of them had even seen you yet. The modiste had made personal house calls, as requested by Lady Danbury.

Now you stood, in front of the carriage, at the first ball of the season, your debut.

You followed behind Sir Henry and Mary Granville, head held high and eyes straight forward as you waded through the ballroom towards Lady Danbury and the Queen.

You heard the whispers and felt the stares as you stood before the queen.

With one leg behind the other and your arms laid at your side, you gently bent your knee and curtsied before her.

She gave you a once over before bowing her head back, a silent approval.

Moving out of the way, you stood at the edge of the dance floor as Lady Danbury approached.

“Miss y/l/n, I do hope you don’t mind that I have taken the liberty of securing you a few gentlemen to fill out your dance card.”

“I expect nothing less from you, Lady Danbury” you smiled back, a teasing tone in your voice.

Your sarcasm and apprehension towards the season had not gone unnoticed by Lady Danbury.

She quite admired your wit and sharp mind, and more than anything, enjoyed the challenge.

******

You were now on your 4th dance of the night; your feet were hurting, and you wanted nothing more than to be curled up with a book.

Fortunately, your current dance partner was not completely awful and was actually quite charming.

Colin Bridgerton.

You had met him once before, in passing, when Lady Danbury had brought you to meet his mother, Violet, and sister, Daphne.

Apparently, Daphne had been named the Diamond of the season in her first season out on society and married a Duke.

His younger sister, Eloise, was preparing for her first season as well.

However, through your brief encounter with Eloise she did not seem as happy with the matter as her sister and mother were.

You had a feeling she would be a good person to befriend.

“Tell me about yourself Miss y/l/n” Colin inquired.

“Y/N,” you quickly corrected.

“Just Y/N is fine,” you smiled slightly.

“Well Y/N, how are you finding London and the beginning of the season?”

“London, well its quite beautiful. There is so much art, and history, and the architecture is amazing. Truly, I wouldn’t mind getting lost here. And well…this—” you paused, glancing around the ball at all the young women around you.

“May I be frank?” you asked, Colin’s eyebrows raising in surprise.

“Of course, Miss Y/N”

“I slightly detest all of this, my feet hurt, and I’ve been dancing for quite too long. Why would I want to marry someone I’ve met one time?”

Colin was slightly taken aback before grinning wildly.

“You remind me of my sister Eloise,” he stated.

“I’ll take that as a compliment, I quite liked her,” you grinned back.

As the dance ended you curtsied before Colin as he bowed before you.

“I hope you find the person you’re looking for Y/N, but I have a feeling you don’t need all of this to do so.”

You smiled widely and slightly nodded before following him off the dance floor.

“I’ll grab us a drink,” he said before walking away. Your eyes followed his back for a few seconds before scanning the room.

They quickly landed on two men whispering in the corner.

The slightly shorter one had massive sideburns and a quizzical look that seemed as if it must be permanently etched onto his face. The other man had a certain air about him.

Even from across the room his light-colored eyes had a shine in them.

Colin returned; you thanked him before looking to the corner again. This time the slightly taller one had caught your gaze and lifted his eyes to meet yours. You felt your face flush and quickly turned your head.

“Colin?”

“Yes?”

“Who are those two men in the corner?”

Colin looked up to see his brothers in the corner looking at him inquisitively.

“Oh, those two? You don’t want to be near the likes of them. Poorly mannered and when they were younger, they would wet the bed for years well beyond what was normal.”

You were following along for a while until that last part.

You gave Colin a quick look to see if he was being serious.

His mouth remained flat and tight-lipped for a few mere seconds before letting through a boisterous laugh.

“My apologies Y/N, those are my brothers.”

Your eyes widened at the confession.

“Your brothers?”

“Yes, lets introduce you,” he stated, beginning to pull you across the ballroom.

“Colin, No I—"

“Brothers, this is Miss y/l/n, Anthony, Benedict,” he pointed out.

You curtsied before both of them before speaking up.

“I told you, just Y/N is fine Colin.”

You weren’t sure what his brothers would say about your slight improperness. It was clear that the Bridgerton’s were a well-respected family in the ton.

You glanced at the eldest brother who you learned was named Anthony who gave you a curt nod before excusing himself to sneak off from an inquiring Lady Danbury.

You smiled at him before turning your gaze to the second eldest Bridgerton.

“Y/N here was telling me about her studies in the states. She is well-read and well-traveled.”

You rolled your eyes, playfully pushing Colin slightly.

“You flatter me, Colin. Unfortunately, I am not perfect. For example, I am about done with all of this and was just about to call a carriage.”

“Oh, but you must stay for one more dance Y/N. Poor Benedict here has not waltzed once.”

Benedict tried to sneakily hit his brother for his clear meddling.

“While that may be true, I do not need my younger brother imposing on such a lovely lady.” Benedict states.

“Nonsense, everyone must waltz at least once,” you laughed, pulling Benedict towards the center of the room.

His eyes widened at your forwardness as he shot Colin a disapproving brotherly look, to which Colin gave him a grin and thumbs up.

As the music began you moved around the room with Benedict.

“So, Mr. Bridgerton, tell me what exactly it is you do.”

“Just Benedict is fine,” he stated, mirroring your words from earlier.

“Besides, aren’t I the one who should be questioning you about your skills?”

“That’s awfully backwards thinking, I hope you don’t get stuck that way” you replied sarcastically before being spun around.

When you returned facing Benedict, a knowing grin was stuck on his face. You were witty. He liked witty.

“I suppose that is fair. I’m an artist, well…I’m trying to be an artist. It’s a little complicated.”

You nodded understandingly, while the arts were enjoyed by many, it wasn’t exactly a noble pursuit, especially for you as a woman.

“You should come by Sir Granville’s studio, it’s quite…”

You couldn’t think of a proper word to describe the soirees Granville hosted. It was taboo and scandalous to most respectable members of society. However, if Benedict was an artist as he was claiming, he should fit right in.

“…inspiring,” you finished.

Benedict gave you an interesting look.

Little did you know, he had been to Granville’s studio, several times.

He hadn’t been in a while since his family had just returned from Aubrey Hall and the preparation for Eloise’s season had been quite hectic for his mother.

But you, picturing you at Granville’s studio was not something Benedict had imagined.

Women who were married or of low social standing was something else, but you, a young lady in her first official season stalking down the halls in such a disreputable manner. It didn’t fit the picture of the beautiful woman before him.

Benedict was quickly learning not to try and categorize you into one box.

“What do you know of Granville’s studio?” he asked seriously.

“Well, for one, I’m staying there. Two, I feel more comfortable among that community than here, if you understand what I mean…” you trail off.

Benedict gives you a small smile of understanding.

As the song ends Benedict lifted your hand to his mouth, kissing it gently before sightly lowering it back down, fingers brushing softly as he pulls away.

“Until next time Y/N”

“I look forward to it Benedict.”

******

Two months had passed since Lady Danbury’s first ball of the season. In that time you had befriended Eloise and Colin Bridgerton, often sitting in the parlor room of their home during the daytime, chatting the day away.

As such, you had also grown closer to Penelope Featherington who also came over often. You always considered yourself to be quite perceptive, so it was evidently clear that Penelope was fond of Colin. You thought about mentioning something, but it didn’t seem like your place.

Throughout your time at the Bridgerton’s household you had seen Benedict a handful of times. Unfortunately, your encounters were reduced to small greetings, stolen glances and light brushes as you walked past each other.

Until today.

You were sitting in the empty parlor room as Eloise ran to her room to fetch some ‘evidence’ and ‘clues’ about Lady Whistledown.

“Good Afternoon Y/N” Benedict greeted as he walked in, taking a quick look around the room to find the two of you alone.

“Afternoon Mr. Bridgerton,” you greeted back, a slight teasing tone to contrast your seemingly formality.

He gave you a knowing look before continuing.

“I hope I’m not being too forward, but I plan on attending Sir Granville’s tonight, I was wondering if I would see you there?”

You gave him a teasing smile before your face fell into a serious and hurt look.

“Mr. Bridgerton, I’m appalled, would a respectable young woman such as myself be caught there? Imagine the horror if the rest of the ton were to find out.”

He let out a loud laugh at your remark, in the short time that he had known you, you never failed to make him laugh.

“Yes Benedict, I’ll see you there,” you smiled.

“Good,” he replied.

******

That night you had a few drinks to help you take the edge off before guests started coming over. There was something about interacting with Benedict that made you nervous.

You were walking around the art studio observing the nude model and the artists renditions when you felt someone lay their hand on your shoulder.

“OH! Oh my, Benedict, you scared me.”

“Sorry, love, didn’t mean to startle you.”

You continued walking around the circle, admiring the art around you.

“She’s stunning, is she not?” you questioned.

“She is,” he answered quickly.

However, when you turned to look at him his eyes were already trained on yours.

You smiled widely, walking out of the studio as Benedict followed like a lost puppy.

“Will I ever get to see your art?” you asked him.

He smiled sheepishly as his arm reached back to scratch the back of his neck.

“I certainly would let you, if there was any.”

“Practicing here for a few months and you still have nothing to show?” you teased.

Benedict gave you a look.

“I may have asked around about you,” you confessed.

“And?” he asks.

From what you have heard, both from his siblings and other people around you. Benedict was a kind and creative soul, with a great appreciation for the beauty around him.

“Your family and friends speak highly of you, that’s important.”

“What about you? What do you speak of me?”

“Besides being a tortured artist? I think highly of you.”

He nodded his head again, before responding.

“I think highly of you as well,” he whispered quietly, leaning down slightly so he was more at eye level.

You blamed the alcohol in your system for what you did next.

Yanking him down by his collar, you pulled him close and reached up until your lips were flush against his, pushing with all your might as if you would never kiss him again.

“Y/N—” he pulled away, his senses flooding back.

“This is…no, I’ve dishonored you I—”

“Oh hush Benedict, I do not care about those rules. I want you.”

He looked down at you, holding your face in his hands as he searched your eyes for confirmation.

Biting your lip and grinning up at him, Benedict couldn’t help but pull you back in, one hand sinking to your waist to pull you closer, the other rested on your cheek.

“You know this means we have to get married now?” Benedict teases.

“That means you presume I would say yes,” you teased back.

His smile grew impossibly bigger as he pulled you back in for a tender kiss.

“Let’s just see how you perform tonight before we think about marriage” you joked.

Benedict pulled back with a smirk and look in his eye you haven’t seen yet as he looked you over.

“Art is all about practicing and perfecting, we might need to practice a few times before you make your final judgement” he teased back.

You threw your head back in surprise, a large laugh leaving your lips before you smiled sweetly at him.

This was not how you imagined the social season going.

check out the rest of my work ⤑ here!

#teentvimagines #bridgerton #bridgerton imagine #benedict bridgerton #benedict bridgerton x reader #benedict bridgerton x you #benedict bridgerton x y/n #benedict #benedict bridgerton x female reader #benedict bridgerton imagine #bridgerton masterlist #bridgerton imagines #anthony bridgerton #colin bridgerton #eloise bridgerton #daphne bridgerton #Spotify

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melodiesofmidnight · 1 year

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One of the most frustrating things about film adaptations of Stephen King's Carrie is the repeated omission of one primary feature of her appearance: her weight. She is not thin; she has bad skin, greasy hair, and frumpy clothing. However, upon the night of her prom, she is able to transform herself into someone considered to be attractive: whilst still being fat.

By continually casting thin, beautiful women in the role of Carrie, the films 1) imply that fat women cannot believably have Cinderella moments without shedding any pounds and 2) remove one of the most crucial aspects of the story: audience introspection.

The films do not force us to recognise and challenge our biases. We do not see ourselves in the bullies, who are humans, for better or worse -- as represented best by Sue Snell and Chris Hargensen. We do not see ourselves as being capable of what these teenagers did to Carrie, because their insults seem comedic and far-fetched to us, parody beyond relatability: Sissy Spacek and Chloe Grace Moretz do not elicit any implicit revulsion in us. They are thin, and beautiful, and the bullies' motivations in harassing them are outlandish and superficial beyond empathy.

However, if Carrie were to be kept fat, the audience would finally be forced to look inward and to recognise the ugliness in themselves that is instilled by societal norms. Instinctually, society rejects fat, unattractive women. Carrie, were she to remain as she was in the book, would elicit the same reaction from general audiences as she does from her classmates at school.

No longer would people be able to distance themselves from their own disdain for women and girls like Carrie by sitting safely behind the absurdity that is an attractive female lead being ridiculed for their appearance. They too would exist as Miss Desjardin did in the novel: sympathetic, pitying, but ultimately put off by Carrie, solely because she does not fit the requirements of modern, aesthetic womanhood.

People would finally be forced to reconcile that with themselves. How much more resonant would Carrie's retribution be if audiences finally felt the full impact of its being directed at themselves just as much as it is directed toward the ill-fated prom attendees? How important of a discussion could it have inspired even back in the 70s?

Even still, Hollywood is too scared to fully sit audiences before a mirror. Even still, we are unable to accept the lessons a novel like Carrie offers without having its protagonist altered nearly beyond recognition. How long will it be before we are able to portray the tragedy of Carrie with all of its nuances intact? How long before we are able to feel the sting of injustice just as sharply when a protagonist is fat as we do when a pretty and thin protagonist is injured?

I'm still waiting for the Carrie modern audiences need to see.

#carrie #stephen king #brian de palma #carrie white #carrietta white #carrie analysis #carrie 1976 #carrie 2013

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shehsart · 7 months

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It's gotten me thinking how it's so tragic it is that the league of villians are ostracized from society and their own families reject them simply for things beyond their control. (Touya's fire quirk incompatibility, Toga's need for blood) They've never been shown empathy so why would they empthatize with those who are blessed by the system? While they are forced to rot in the streets those with "socially acceptable" quirks get to thrive.

And it's beautifully written how these feelings of ostracism cause them anger and cause them pain all because all of them just wanted to love. Like Mary Shelley said "I have love in me the likes of which you can scarcely imagine and rage the likes of which you would not believe. If I cannot satisfy one, I will indulge the other."

Their "love" turns to loathing and drives them to madness. Touya loved his father and he was his no1 hero but if the no 1 hero beats his wife and abuses his kids what about the rest? Society has driven them insane then it hates them for being ugly victims too. If they were dead or passive it would've been convenient. Hawks calls twice unlucky before killing him and he refutes it in his last moments as Toga embraces him. He wasn't unlucky, he was just never accepted by those around him and he finally found that acceptance within the league. He says he lived a fulfilling life because he got to love them.

I just wished we got to see things from the villains perspectives more. MHA would've been much darker and grittier that way but I'm atleast glad we got their side of the story too. Love and rejection have always been a central theme of the league, they're almost inseparable.

#love them they are so Frankenstein coded #league of villains #lov #dabi #touya todoroki #shimura tenko #toga himiko #shigaraki tomura #twice #jin bubaigawara #shuichi iguchi #mr compress #bnha #mha #my hero academia #can't believe they were written by a shounen author #they represent the ugliest side of abuse victims this is so unique i think #and takes skill to write

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thecruellestmonth · 5 months

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Jason Todd 2023 fic recs

Some of the best Jason Todd fics that were posted or updated in the year 2023.

"Beneficiary" by sirsparklepants https://archiveofourown.org/works/44845189 - The beneficiaries of the estate of Jason Todd. Wonderfully bittersweet. A story about "the logistical demands of death" and "the banalities of death and grief".

"The Extremely True Story of the Titans Tower Attack" by Wisetypewriter https://archiveofourown.org/works/45011785 - Red Hood evilly dragged the iron maiden Talia had gifted him in the Titans Tower’s kitchen. He cackled to himself, so deliciously happy to be able to test it on Robin. -- The most "Titans Tower AU" ever of all time. A must-read for anyone who hates or loves fanon.

The Foreigner by somecaveats https://archiveofourown.org/works/44992420 - Jason had played out Bruce’s first words to him again and again, the blame, the disgust, the rejection, and then, sometimes, when he was feeling sentimental, tears and warmth and muttered prayers about the miracle of his return. He had thought he was prepared for anything. --Or; Immediately after the Lazarus Pit, Jason comes back. -- You know those fantasies of Jason returning to the family in a neater and more palatable way? And all his loved ones react so sweetly and supportively and sensitively—as if Jason's own behavior were the singular deciding factor in whether the family is functional and healthy? This isn't that. Or; in which Jason receives a damningly reluctant welcome home, has several ugly ugly panic attacks, and expertly deduces that one of Bruce's Wayne ancestors got it on with John Singer Sargent. [work in progress/incomplete]

"how it feels to be immune" by maangoes https://archiveofourown.org/works/44490682 - He spent a year in a villa in the Hindu Kush. He doesn’t remember most of it. There were people that cleaned and made him food. The whole house smelled like Talia, like rose and jasmine flowers. This is a soothing little vignette, like a calm before a storm. Talia shines in her competence and in her tenderness, while also struggling to make the right choices for Jason's post-resurrection recovery.

whether a beast or a human being by Goldmonger https://archiveofourown.org/series/3417622 - The Red Hood has been recaptured by the Batman and consigned to a private prison, one buried deep beneath Gotham City. The Dark Knight has encountered insane and deadly criminals before, and knows the havoc that can be wreaked from allowing them any kind of freedom. The Red Hood will spend the rest of his life under observation, and will be cared for according to the directives of the Batman. It is unlikely that he will rejoin society, but that is a sacrifice that must be made to protect the citizens of Gotham. Or: "The Wide Sargasso Sea: Jason Todd Edition." Now serendipitously even more relevant after Gotham War! This story contains extreme and unmitigated pain, and severe medical abuse. In the words of the writer: a story "of how even the closest relationship with the most love in the world can fall apart under the right conditions." This is an ongoing/incomplete story, but each installment feels like a satisfying pausing point.

"catch and release" by hellsreluctantheir https://archiveofourown.org/works/50457703 - Dick & Jason hurt/comfort, with POV Dick. In the words of one commenter, this is a sweet story that really appreciates Dick's "constant worrying & planning & trauma and huge sense of responsibility that he’s always got going there" with respect to the ups and downs of his history with Jason.

"Neighbours" by Aingeal98 https://archiveofourown.org/works/40132554 - Bruce loved his son. Bruce was delighted that his son was making new friends. But there was something odd about that family, and no it wasn't just because Cassandra's mother outvoted him at the last PTA meeting, Jason. (That may have played a small part. Sue him, he's human.) PTA AU starring Cass and Shiva, with Jason as a supporting character. A feel-good story with comedy, friendship, family, and tiny pre-teen urban justice crusader Cass as our intrepid hero!

"EURUS" by cowboymater https://archiveofourown.org/works/50555239/chapters/127711369 - "Eurus is a continued interrogation of our own beliefs […] the record seeks to capture the feelings of dark woods, dry branches, dead leaves, and wondering who had migrated — you, or your flock?" OR: Jason Todd, his convictions, his forgiveness, and the cycles of violence and hope (violent hope, sometimes) he may never be free of.

"Ages 12 & Up" by motleyfam https://archiveofourown.org/works/52384984 - See, the real reason that Damian always refuses painkillers is that he cannot swallow a pill. Cute and fun. Damian is a tough little guy, and Jason is an obnoxiously annoying big brother.

"YOU MUST KNOW LIFE TO KNOW DECAY." by orpheusaki @damianbugs https://archiveofourown.org/works/48513616 - For as long as Jason can remember, it's always been raining. Jason's memories of rainy days throughout his life. The rain continues, and so does Jason.

"Get Joker" by chucklesbuckles https://archiveofourown.org/works/49377664 - Harley tries to bond with Jason over their singular shared point of trauma, obsesses over the dead bird's hands, and alienates him by having a platonic hard on for his dad. Jason just wants to make bets over who on their team will bite it first. In which Suicide Squad: Get Joker! is scrapped for parts and melted down. Harley's retrospective on having knowingly loved someone who tortured Barbara Gordon and killed Robin. [POV Harley Quinn.]

"Down to Dust" by Sparkypants https://archiveofourown.org/works/47407291 - It's not the warehouse that Jason has nightmares about. It's Bruce. Bruce deciding to cremate him instead of bury him. Because if he had, what would Jason be now? An infinite number of pieces, cast into the wind. Smoke hanging in the air and never whole or home again, part of him always missing. A spiral of psychological horror, then some hurt/comfort.

"the shadow of violence" by shipyrds https://archiveofourown.org/works/49059019 - Jason shoots someone to protect Damian. Bruce, as usual, has opinions.

"promises" by sunspikes https://archiveofourown.org/series/3413851 - After a nightmarish premonition, young Jason makes Bruce promise not to bury him.

"through death and time" by sparkycap https://archiveofourown.org/works/45733813 - After a mission that takes Batman and Nightwing back twenty years in the past, they end up with time to kill. Bruce does what he does best: he finds a kid. Luckily this one is already his. The fluffiest feel-good fluff available, featuring Bruce & Dick & Jason. Sweeter than WFA.

"The Daughter of the Water" by chucklesbuckles https://archiveofourown.org/works/46605205 - “To walk the world!” it croons, bright gold spilling over it’s cheeks, highlighting the springy white curls crowning it’s head. It bends, cold wet hands cradling Talia’s face, wiping her tears away. It places a soft kiss to her forehead, tucking a loose curl of hair behind her ear, torchlight eyes burning. “Thank you for the body.” The Lazarus Pit takes Jason's body for a long and productive joyride. A creepy and wet story featuring Talia & Jason, with POV Talia.

"Confessional" by Temeritous https://archiveofourown.org/works/45307363 - Jason gets hit with a truth spell and uses it in an inadvisable manner. Ooh, the emotional pain here is exquisite. It's like helplessly watching a glass bottle of olive oil drop and shatter and spill all over the floor.

"Oracle Movie Trailer" by centreoftheselights https://archiveofourown.org/works/47940070 - A screenplay for a trailer for a Oracle: Year One origin movie, featuring Robin II as a supporting character. We love the idea of a movie following Barbara's recovery and journey to becoming Oracle.

Red X by ilovelegendsalot https://archiveofourown.org/series/1211157 - Mostly following the canon events of the Teen Titans cartoon, from the perspective of the second Red X, Jason Todd.

"salt in the wound (and a kiss on my cheek)" by pseudonym123 https://archiveofourown.org/works/52471159/ - A RHATO #25 canon divergence fic where Roy doesn't come to Jason's rescue that night on the rooftop. Bruce and Jason deal with the fall out. [incomplete/work in progress]

[2022]

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biocrafthero · 4 months

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An analysis of WKTD and HWBM in relation to psychology, Christianity, and oppression.

Spoilers for almost all of We Know The Devil and parts of Heaven Will Be Mine (only stuff from when you play as Saturn tho that’s the only character I’ve played as so far)

This post is very much off the cuff so it is quite messy but I really needed to put my thoughts into words, I guess. Hopefully it makes sense, and sorry if there’s any errors!

vvv Analysis under the cut because this post is LONG vvv

Okay because when WKTD said “the devil is the shadow of man cast from the light of god” and when HWBM said that the Existential Threat was just a byproduct of the shadow of humanity cast from gravity (via humanity’s Culture) its like the enemy that humans want to fight is just themselves. The concept of the “shadow self” (also called the id, but I’ll be using shadow instead) in psychology refers to the parts of oneself that does not fully fit in with what society expects of them (Super-ego) and sometimes separately from the true self (Ego), typically leading to rejection of those aspects and self-conflict.

Now, please note that I haven’t 100%’d HWBM but I have 100%’d WKTD, and in that game the true ending results in the main trio all becoming devils and embracing those sides of themselves they’ve been running from for the entire game. The thing I quoted earlier is an actual line from the game said by god, the line following it being “the meaning of this phrase is that there is no devil.” Only through self-acceptance and helping each other alongside ourselves do we really reach the true ending to these stores.

While WKTD leans more towards individuals, HWBM puts more emphasis on the idea of the collective shadow; the story still focuses on individuals, yes, but is very much about the conflict between a humanity that is tearing itself apart over the things that don’t fit the collective image. The main conflicts of the story focuses a lot on that general unrest, and was initially the Existential Threat, but after that dissipated humanity still saw its own shadow, this time in itself. An email you can find in the game even says that “In abandoning Existential Threats to address the threats of our home, it will inevitably result in us turning to conflict between humans one more. And in turn, the Existential Threat will thrive.” The Existential Threat literally feeds on unrest and trauma, manifesting as paranoia and leading humanity to fight it, only for them to find that they were just fighting their own literal shadow.

It’s also important to note that HWBM briefly mentions that the Existential Threat is tangentially related to “their cousins on Earth, and even those are so weak kids with radios can take them out”. This, while it can easily be seen as a nod to WKTD for those who played it, the fact that the reference is super blatant (along with the mention of the Scout programs, likely referring to groups like the Summer Scouts from WKTD) leads me to believe that these two stories exist in roughly the same universe (or at least their worlds do, maybe not the characters present in the stories themselves existing at the same time*). This is for a very specific reason, and it has to do with the themes both of these games are tackling, regarding acceptance of the self, both on an individual and societal level, symbolized by the apple.

Both games reference the apple when talking about the idea of becoming something new, sometimes even beyond humanity. It’s about the embracing of the shadow and all the parts of yourself, seeing yourself as a whole being and accepting all of it. The joy and contentment brought upon yourself by finally letting go of all that repression and division, even if the world around you is going to perceive those parts as scary or ugly. Bad endings in these games are brought about by rejection of the self, which makes sense considering all the themes around queerness and transcending one’s humanity, so obviously and fittingly the true endings focus on healing oneself by accepting all of their aspects as part of the greater whole.

The apple in these stories, especially noticeable in its original thematic incarnation in WKTD, is in reference to the fruit from the Tree of the Knowledge of Good and Evil in the Garden of Eden from the Bible. Man was forbidden from eating the fruit, but Eve (VERY important to note that the dev studio is named Worst Girls Games btw) is tempted by the serpent (was not originally the devil, but came to be in the New Testament) to eat the fruit, which they do and become aware of themselves. God banishes them from the garden for breaking this rule he set out for them, also punishing the snake in the process due to how it tempted Adam and Eve. This incident is referred to as the “original sin.”

What is interesting about this part of the Bible though is what God says at the end of Genesis 3, right before the banishment actually occurs: “And the Lord God said, ‘The man has now become like one of us, knowing good and evil. He must not be allowed to reach out his hand and take also from the tree of life and eat, and live forever.’” The specific wording of “become like one of us” in the context of the apple metaphors from the games from Worst Girls Games is super intriguing to me, mostly due to how the idea of becoming something new is super common throughout these stories—becoming the devil in WKTD, and becoming one’s Ship-Self in HWBM.

There’s also the framing of the serpent in these stories, as well. The serpent in modern Christianity is almost always depicted as the devil, tempting humanity away from God throughout almost the entire scripture. In the book of Revelation, the devil is said to have gone to direct war against God and fighting against his angels; “Then war broke out in heaven. Michael and his angels fought against the dragon, and the dragon and his angels fight back. But he was not strong enough, and they lost their place in heaven. The great dragon was hurled down—that ancient serpent called the devil, or Satan, who leads the whole world astray. He was hurled to the earth, and his angels with him.” These verses can easily be seen in parallel to WKTD, with how the devil forms are said to be unstable and her world more fickle than god’s, and how in HWBM the Ship-Selves are delicately maintained by the Lunar Gravity Well.

But here’s the thing: the framing of the devil in these stories puts it in the position of being correct, with humanity making the right choice to follow it. This may sound strange, almost like villain behavior, until you remember these games deal with themes regarding repression of the self under an oppressive society, which is why these societies tend to be characterized by Evangelical conservative Christianity. Under this lens, alongside the themes of queerness and transcending humanity (rising to the throne of god, in a way), everything begins to click into place. The idea of being forced to live a certain way by a society that hates parts of your very being is killing our main characters, and they want a way out. The personification of the Collective Unconscious (ex: the devil) gives them this out—even if it’s less concrete and stable than the known world (the light), the unknown world (the darkness) is what truly gives our characters the freedom they desire.

They cannot do this alone, however, as we see in the Bible further into the book of Revelation, when the devil is aided by a beast from the sea and a beast from the earth, all three of them holding one another up and emphasizing one another’s’ powers and authorities. This, of course, most likely is reflected in the games in the main trios we play as. While I am still unsure about specifics, I trust you guys enough to understand what I’m getting at here, even if my speculations are likely flimsy at best. Either way, the idea gets across—the true endings for the games can only be obtained if everyone supports one another properly.

The scripture states that the devil does not have long on earth to do what he wishes (“… [The devil] is filled with fury, because he knows that his time is short.”), but that doesn’t stop him from trying at all. When it comes to the games, in WKTD the main trio stay in the cabin only for the night (player choices start at 7pm and the final one is at 1am, 2am onward being the ending you got, so choices go on for 6-7 in-universe hours), and in HWBM they have eight days to get back to earth before humanity declares them to be a threat. In both stories, our protagonists are all under strict time limits to do what they can in order to get the outcome they desire. As it’s said in WKTD, “the devil only ever gets one chance.”

Even though in the Bible the devil is ultimately defeated, in these games it’s the opposite. This is less about the theology they draw from and more having to do with undoing oppressive power structures through solidarity and community support while doing what you can to avoid infighting. Systems of hate and oppression are easily undone, which is why they put in so much work to scare you away from even trying to undo it and make you fall in line; resistance scares oppressors. Of course, resisting is not an easy task, but that’s just part of the work—they don’t call it a fight for no reason, after all.

Accepting all aspects of yourself and embracing that is the first small, yet very important step, to rejecting oppressive systems as a whole, and when society as a whole accepts what the system rejects, that system will inevitably fall, freeing those who are under it. Even though the world that comes after may be more uncertain and unstable that the last one, we still have each other to rely on and a foundation to build something greater and healthier than before.

So, roughly and basically…

Super-ego = God = Culture

Ego = Humanity (consistent throughout both games)

Projection = Light = Gravity

Resistance = Radio = Ship-Self

Shadow (personified by Collective Unconscious) = The Devil = Existential Threat

Acceptance (of the Shadow) = Apple (consistent throughout both games), characterized by devil possession forms and Ship-Selves (Ship-Selves are dual natured like that, I think)

… Or something like that. I dunno, I’m not a psychologist.

Once again, I have seen all of WKTD, so I can say these things concretely about that story. However, I have not seen all of HWBM, so it more so feels like I’m making guesses as to what happens in that one, so just bear with me. I’ll be super hype if I’m correct in my theory/analysis.

*On this note, it is very amusing to me to imagine the WKTD trio as space mech pilots. The idea of the main cast of HWBM having to deal with devil possessions is also very fun :3

Sources for information + screenshots I’m referencing

Wikipedia: Shadow (psychology) (links throughout the article lead to other things I’ve mentioned like the Collective Unconscious)

Bible Gateway: Genesis 3, Revelation 12, Revelation 13 (New International Version)

(from WKTD) (not my screenshot, stole this from my friend) (hi Ash <3) (platonic)

(I don’t have a screenshot of the line that comes afterwards or the line talking about the metaphorical apple in the epilogue of the true ending but I know they’re there. I have it in my brain. I’m too lazy to get a picture of it just trust me I know what I’m talking about trust)

(from HWBM) (screenshots taken by me)

(I don’t have absolutely everything either just work with me here sorry)

#rambles #hwbm #wktd #analysis #sorry guys I had a category 10 autism event and needed to get this out of my system #we know the devil #heaven will be mine

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madreemeritus · 9 months

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Don Juan Triumphant — An analysis of Erik's masterpiece

Warning: i don't speak French and i don't have english editions of PotO, only Portuguese, so i will translate it directly from my text

Gaston Leroux's novel narrates the fact that Erik was producing an Opera of his own with the theme "Don Juan Triumphant". Unfortunately, we never hear it because it's a book, but a few adaptations brought his work to live with different interpretations.

Let's analyze what Leroux intented to write with Erik's character.

Don Juan is a Spanish archetype of a lascivious and libertine man, created by Tirso de Molina, a poet and religious playwright of the Middle Ages. His character was supposed to be an antagonist of what society considered to be moral and pure at that time. And as any other story, it has its adaptations.

Don Giovanni (the same as Don Juan) is the work of Mozart (composer) and Lorenzo Da Ponte (writer), where Don Giovanni is a scoundrel who seduces and abandons women; one of his victims has his father murdered by Don Giovanni after he tried to prevent the seduction. The spirit of the Commander (Donna Anna's father murdered by D. Giovanni) returns in the form of a statue and drags the protagonist to hell with the help of demons.

Erik, after Christine asks him to play Don Juan Triumphant, says: "Never ask me that. This Don Juan was not composed for the libretto of a Lorenzo Da Ponte, inspired by wine, by furtive loves and by vices finally punished by God. I can play Mozart if I so wish, which will bring beautiful tears to your eyes and inspire you with frank reflections. But my Don Juan burns, Christine, and not because he has been hit by heavenly fire!" (...) "You see, Christine, there is a song so terrible that it consumes all who approach it. You haven't reached it yet, and that's good, because you would lose your soft colors and they wouldn't recognize you anymore on your return to Paris" (...)

Erik says that his Don Juan "burns" and that Christine was in no condition to understand the somber depths of his masterpiece. He refuses to play Don Juan at first (although he is willing to play other Mozart pieces), but after being unmasked, he plays in a form of escapism. Christine is enthralled by the terrible, somber performance. Erik's Don Juan is a reflection of the pain he feels.

He apparently has no interest in writing a story like Don Giovanni, possibly an inspiration for him is Lord Byron's version, where Don Juan is neither a seducer nor a villain: but a victim of a cruel and false love of a woman. Erik says that it took him years to finish his work, as if each event in his life influenced the work more. He also says that, when finishing Don Juan Triumphant, he would die and be buried along with the scores: he changes his mind when he falls in love with Christine.

Don Juan is an archetype that contradicts everything Erik is and believes. Erik scares women by his ugliness / Don Juan seduces and conquers them all. Erik wants true love / Don Juan wants to deceive women in exchange for sex. Don Juan is a handsome, seductive man who is admired by people / Erik was born deformed and was abused, humiliated and rejected by (almost) everyone he met. Erik would probably change the character of Don Juan just as Lord Byron changed it according to his own life experience. That's why he is "Don Juan Triumphant", rather than the protagonist's defeat.

Christine's words after hearing Don Juan Triumphant: "His Don Juan Triumphant (for there was no longer any doubt that he had rushed his masterpiece to forget the horror of the present minute) appeared to me only one long, frightening, magnificent sob, where poor Erik had deposited all his misery." (...) "I remembered the notebook with red notes and easily imagined that that song had been written in blood. It guided me through all the details of martyrdom; it made me enter all the corners of the abyss, the inhabited abyss by the ugly man; it showed me Erik atrociously banging his poor, ugly head against the funereal walls of hell, where he had taken refuge so as not to frighten human eyes any longer, where Pain was deified, and then, the sounds that saw from the abyss and suddenly grouped together in a prodigious and threatening flight. the world. I understood that the work was finally done and that Ugliness, borne on the Wings of Love, had dared to look Beauty in the face!" (...)

For me, Erik's Don Juan is an expression of his life and inner demons. The rejection, the suffering, the pain, the hate, the jealousy, and at the same time, the love, the desire and the will to be loved like any other human being. Erik is as much compared with Death as with Sexuality. This duality would be expressed in his work. And since the work is Triumphant, in the end he would find the love and happiness he longed for.

Adaptations

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In my opinion, Andrew Loyd Webber's "Don Juan Triumphant" doesn't make much sense because it only explores a carnal scandal between Don Juan and Aminta. It looks like the same character as Tirso de Molina and Lorenzo Da Ponte, not the alternative — painful and suffering — version of Erik. There is no tragedy, no hellfire and no suffering. It just seems like an empty work made to shock the society of the 19th century. "Oh but it's Erik's self insert", the original work was clearly an escapism, a reflection of his life, a form of expression of the pain he felt. It's not that Erik's work in the book doesn't explore the theme of sexuality, but that's not all. It's not just a horny show between Erik and Christine. Especially because it gives off a weird vibe that Erik just wanted sex with her, and that's a lie. I do love The Point of No Return by its beautiful melody and my E/C bullshit that likes some horny fanfiction.

I adore, however, the 1925s (or 1929s rebuilt) "Don Juan". Not only because it's the main theme scored by Gabriel Thibaudeau, but also because this specifically is the unmasking scene and it captures everything that I imagined as Leroux's description. The pain, the passion, the tragedy, is all there. Lon Chaney's Erik says to Christine that since the first time he saw her, he was inspired to write such a magnificent piece of music. Not 20 years writing it as originally, but more a romantic inspiration coming from his heart. This adaptation, to be fair, is my favorite.

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And another version which I apreciate a lot is the 1989 slasher movie with Robert Englund. It's such a sublime song that remarks the exact 'Dark Romance' vibes of E/C relantionship. Obviously is not the best adaptation, actually it has little to do with the original work as Christine is a time traveler, Erik is a murderous psychopath villain and the story goes totally into a supernatural horror. But if you put in your mind that PotO and A Nightmare On Elm Street were merely an inspiration to a slasher/supernatural movie, it's actually an interesting experience.

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So in conclusion, this was my analysis of the mysterious Don Juan Triumphant. Feel free to disagree or point out new things in the comments 🙏🏽❤️

#erik #the phantom of the opera #poto #gothic #gothic literature #gaston leroux #andrew lloyd webber #musical #broadway #lon chaney #poto 1925 #the phantom of the opera 1925 #silent movies #robert englund #don juan triumphant #the phantom of the opera 1989 #erik destler

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wisecrackzach · 5 months

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Durge HCs (with appearances from Gortash)

Some hc rotating in my brain about my durge but I'm too lazy to write fics rn so this is my outlet

The Dark Urge and Gortash learned how to ballroom dance together. Gortash knew he was going to take over Baldur's Gate and figured he should know how to dance like the rich do (he's the kinda guy who believes in dressing for the job you want). So, he decides to teach himself and Durge too since he wants to rule with them. It was clumsy, messy, and got a little violent, bloody, and even erotic at times.

Gortash also made Durge do some other proper society training. Obviously, Durge wasn't built for proper society but Gortash dreamed of it and now thay dream included Durge. So, he made them also learn what fork to use for when (the beast and belle dinner scene frfr) and posture training. Durge hated this very much. They threatened Gortash life many times and many fork were stabbed into hands.

I refuse to believe that Gortash doesn't know how to lace his shirt. Therefore, I've decided that durge used to lace them that way because they were always dressed by their followers so they didn't know how. And now Gortash keeps it that way.

I 100% think that Gortash is obsessed with money and appearing rich. He buys gaudy expensive clothes but doesn't know how to wear them or the current trends because he didn't grow up rich. So, he looks kinda silly with his ugly red shoes and anxiety robe but no one dares make fun of him for it.

And because he cared about clothes and presentation he would buy Durge a lot of clothes that durge probably never wore.

Durge probably went to the shoe store Gortash's parents own when they were a kid before becoming the dark urge.

Orin and Durge are kinda like Zuko and Azula to me. Like even though they're both kinda fucked up inside and hate each other, they're still siblings. They probably had dumb arguments as teens like normal siblings but a little bloodier. And they probably braided each other hair and cared for one enough without admitted it was that. I wish so badly their could be an ending with Orin with a redeemed Durge like their was with Zuko and Azula.

Kinda fucked up but I wouldn't put it past them, Orin and Gortash hooked up after the Durge was taken. Buuut Orin would be shapeshifted into Durge for Gortash. Additionally, Orin used the Durge form to mess with Gortash just for fun.

Redeemed Durge HCs

The general public does not know about Durge being from Bhaal's temple and kinda being the cause of it all. Except for Duke Ravengard (if alive). Which makes it really awkward for a Durge romancing Wyll because his father is so clearly scared of Durge. They feel bad and they're trying to calm him but he's definitely resents them a little.

Durge probably killed Gortash's parents after the whole saving the world thing in the good ending. Like this might be a redeemed durge but they still killed them cause they still felt bad for Gortash and his parents sucked.

Durge made a memorial for Orin, Gortash, and Ketheric. Maybe they even added The Dark Urge too, just to remind themselves that's not who they are anymore.

If Durge is a warlock then original their patron is Bhaal but after they reject him Withers is their new patron.

Since they're kinda the hero of Baldur's Gate now, Durge was forced to do a bunch of public appearances and go to fancy parties and balls. Unfortunately, they've forgotten everything that Gortash taught them before about being in the upper crust so Durge is totally lost and feels like a rabid wolf in a bowtie. However, the gang helps them where they can. Primarily, Wyll and Astarion. Lae'zel offers advice but it's never any good...

#durge hc #bg3 #bg3 fic #bg3 hc #bg3 hcs #durge hcs #bg3 durge #bg3 spoilers #bg3 gortash #enver gortash #gortash x durge

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romewritingshop · 8 months

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Just Like Magic

Fandom: Jujutsu Kaisen

Pairing: Viscount!Choso x Maid/Reader

Warning: Swearing? Threatening behaviour and use of knife

MASTERLIST

A/N: Some of you may have read this before, I just had to make a few changes in narrative and now I feel it is ready. Part 1 might seem not much but part 2 will be a bit more different. Part 3 is coming soon. Thanks and I hope you enjoy. Let me know what you think! Follow, comment or reblog, IDC because I enjoy writing this fic. Please pay attention before reading.

(Y/N) felt a tight lodge in her throat as she waited in front of the church's double doors. She adjusted the collar of the blue dress whilst her mind wandered. Finally the moment she had long awaited for had arrived. Three years and she was at the start of the fanfic she read but actually being in it was a different experience.

A gruff noise came from behind her which had (Y/N) freeze in her position. With a nervous glance, she felt blood flush from her face as a tall stoic man, with a thick small moustache, dressed in a regal purple robe. Still looking ugly and menacing in the last two years, since she had arrived in this world.

Duke Kenjaku had a cursory glint in his eyes as he examined (Y/N) from head to toe. After what seemed to be a lifetime, the Duke gave a grim satisfied nod as he stepped up to stand next to (Y/N), taking out a tentative hand out for her to hold on.

"You clean up decently for a servant girl."

(Y/N) bowed her head down, not wanting to respond to his comment. She had to tread carefully around this man, watching the doors as an empty church hall was unveiled to them; save for two men at the other end of the hall. The Duke plastered a cheshire grin as he began to lead (Y/N) down the aisle.

"I hope you remember my proposal. It would be wise of you not to turn back on your word, lest you would like to face the consequences of your actions."

(Y/N) gave a nod but he squeezed her hand tightly, expecting a verbal response.

"I remember clearly, your Grace."

If she didn't value her life so highly, she would have stabbed him to death. But right now was the start of the plot, the character that drew her in. (Y/N) lifted her head up to take a proper look at the man she was going to marry. The man with a rectangular mark on his nose, his eyes held a world of love. It felt like a stab at her heart because she knew it wasn't directed for her but for someone else he was expecting under the veil.

Her soon-to-be husband was Itadori Choso of Kaprines. Choso was a knight-turned-viscount who fought in the war against Wotrea and was relatively well known. From what she remembered about the story, Choso wanted to marry Lady Yorozu because he fell for her at first sight. However the Duke had another plan in mind hence (Y/N) was in a veil and wedding dress.

She met Choso at the altar. He politely bowed to which she and the Duke returned the gesture. He held out a gloved hand for her to grasp on as she finally stepped up to meet him, looking up to connect her eyes to his; before they turned to face the priest.

(Y/N) couldn’t tell how she felt. It had been three years since she was transported into this world. In that time, she had to quickly learn her role as a maid and integrate herself into society. Once again, she was going to have to do the same thing for she was marrying into nobility. Although the character she transported into was a reader insert so she could have any personality she wanted. And she was glad that of the Jujutsu Kaisen characters she read, she was with the one she liked most, Choso.

She faintly understood what the priest was saying and after what seemed to be an eternity the priest announced to the guests.

"If any person rejects this marriage, speak now or forever hold thine peace."

(Y/N) was tempted to speak out, to scream that she was forced into this marriage, to scream that the Duke was misleading Choso but no words could come to her throat. If she did speak, then worse was to come not just to her but her brother. In this story, Toge Innumaki was her brother. The sweet young man, who was mute in this book. She couldn’t have Duke Kenjaku hurt him. Again. Then came the dreaded words.

"Sir Itadori Choso, do you take Lady Kenjaku Yorozu of Shiuh Shia to be your lawfully wedded wife? To have and to hold, in sickness and in health, 'til death do thee part?"

"I do."

"Lady Kenjaku Yorozu, do you consent to Sir Itadori Choso of Kaprines taking you as his lawfully wedded wife? To have and to hold, in sickness and in health, 'til death do thee part?"

"I consent."

(Y/N) said all too quickly and it dawned on her that they were now finally married. She now faced her husband, raising her head for him and getting ready for him to kiss her when he turned to the priest with a hushed tone. (Y/N) seemed confused, before it dawned on her that this was the exact moment that made her fall in love with the story as Choso turned back with a big smile on his face.

He stepped close to (Y/N), gently grasping her arms and leaning down to press a soft kiss on her forehead. After the kiss, he leant down to her ear to explain.

"I wish to save our proper kiss for our consummation tonight. I admit I'm afraid that I would act improperly if I were to kiss you on the lips."

(Y/N) felt her heart melt at his caring nature as she gazed at his loving expression, also surprised at his unconditional affection towards her. But deep down inside, where her gut swirled with uncertainty and unease, the affection was not meant for her. The wedding was now complete, Choso stepped down a little distance away so that (Y/N) could say her goodbyes.

"Is my brother safe now, your grace?"

"Your brother is safe. You, however, may not be. You have to pay the price once he learns the truth. After all, your job is to do as your master says."

There was a tinge of threat laced in his last statement. On the one hand, she was glad that Toge was safe but now she realises the painful part of the story that is to start. There was nothing else she could say but to accept her fate as she turned to see her husband gazing adoringly at her.

The Duke stepped away from (Y/N) to talk to Choso, probably saying some false comforting words about taking care of his 'daughter'. After a few brief moments, Choso stepped away from the Duke to go to his wife.

"We are leaving for my palace now. Your effects have already arrived at the palace."

(Y/N) gave a nod and held on to Choso's outstretched hand before being led by him to the carriage that was waiting outside. She was uncertain of what the future held for her now. One thing was certain, she was not going to play the story exactly as she read. It was an angsty story with no satisfaction for romance, but it was written descriptively well and it made her sob endlessly for days. Right now, she needed to tell him the truth whilst finding a way to not be killed.

The both of them settled opposite one another and the carriage set off. The sun was beginning to set as (Y/N) stared out the window, a wide range of thoughts running through her head.

"What are you thinking about, Princess?"

(Y/N) frowned at the wording and shifted her head to turn to Choso, who was leant back against the seat. It was at this moment she finally took a glance at his attire which seemed to make her bashful as he wore a same colour blue blazer with a white shirt and white trousers. A blue coloured shawl with embroidered blue anemones and ravens was draped across his torso and pinned to the shoulder. There were many golden thread embroidery stitches along the hem of the blazer. He had matched well with her and dressed impeccably.

He was nothing like the Choso she knew, though it was a fanfiction story. Only the personality of Choso was here and not his style of clothes that he would originally wear. It was time to forget her old life and start anew.

"Nothing in particular my Lord."

"Call me Choso, Princess."

(Y/N) felt heat flush her cheeks as she stared straight at her husband, torn to say anything.

"If you do not want to then you can whisper it to me in our room tonight."

(Y/N)'s eyes widened as she glanced up at her husband, who had a smug grin. He seemed to revel in teasing (Y/N) or to Yorozu. Maybe Choso and Lady Yorozu were closely acquainted. Wait no, what she remembered was that Choso had fallen for Yorozu at first sight. He didn't know what a truly awful woman she was. Her hands clenched tightly as she said nothing and snapped her head to the window.

Choso noticed this and leant forward to grasp her hand with reassurance, slightly embarrassed that he had scared his wife.

"Yorozu … I'm sorry, I didn't mean to make you uncomfortable."

(Y/N) felt her throat hitch at his apology. In a few hours, he would take back the apology. Choso gave a soft smile and leant back to glance out the window, sitting in silence, as the carriage rode for three hours. It wasn't long before (Y/N) could finally see the palace come to view. It was captivating as the lanterns illuminated the palace walls and towers. It stood tall and proud as the carriage halted in front of the palace doors.

The entrance was empty save for a tall imposing man with blonde hair, dressed in black trousers and a blue buttoned shirt, matched with a beige robe. This man seemed to be important as he bowed at the carriage before stepping forward and opening the door. Choso stepped down first, exchanging polite greetings with the man before turning to the carriage to help his bride step off the carriage. Once (Y/N) got off, Choso closed the carriage door which signalled to the footman to drive the carriage down to the stables.

(Y/N) turned to face the man, who seemed to have a rather grim expression on his face. Choso didn’t seem to notice this as he rambled.

“This is Nanami. He is the head housekeeper and helps me manage the estate. Should you require anything, please ask him.”

(Y/N) gave a polite nod and smile as Nanami graciously bowed in respect.

“It is a pleasure to meet you my Lady.”

(Y/N) curtseyed in response before Choso began to lead (Y/N) inside the palace, rather hurriedly; it was certain that he was eager to spend time with her. The windows brought a glow of moonshine into the palace which made it easier for Choso to see where he was going. (Y/N) was unsure about why he was rushing and it wasn’t long when Choso threw his doors open to a large room.

It was grand and spacious with ivory coloured walls. The walls had embedded designs of arches with gold lining. There was a balcony that was large and concave shaped, a simple bench was at the front and thin gossamer curtains hung across the door. The bed was a four poster bed with pale green bed sheets and embroidered blue flowers. There was life to the room as (Y/N) stepped in to take in the design.

Choso quietly shut the bedroom doors and stepped towards his wife, clasping her shoulders and leaning close to her as if sharing a secret.

“What do you think of our room?”

It suddenly dawned on (Y/N) that this was her room. Her and her husband’s room. Her husband, who thought she was Lady Yorozu. It’s gone on for far too long and he needed to know the truth. She opened her mouth to start.

“Our room?”

It wasn’t what she wanted to say but she felt a tight lodge in her throat that refused to speak the truth. This was silly but Choso hummed as he slowly turned his wife to face him, his heart pounding against his ribs. He needed to be confident for his new wife.

“Yes. Is it not our duty as husband and wife to share a room?”

“That is true.”

“And should they not also share the same bed?”

(Y/N) felt heat grow in her cheeks as she bowed her head to look away, he wasn’t going to let her be shy when he had gained the strength to be confident. He curled a finger under her chin and lifted her face to look directly into the silhouette of her face which was still hidden under the veil. It hadn’t dawned on him that he had yet to take off her veil and to see her face in its true beauty.

“My dear wife. With your consent, may I share my body with yours? As a husband should.”

As he was saying the words, he was slowly lifting her veil up. (Y/N) felt her blood run cold and her limbs froze as she stared into Choso’s eyes. Shock settled over the both of them as Choso lost his joyful loving expression. It couldn’t be. Choso stumbled back, staying a clear distance from her, bewildered by the unknown woman in front of him.

“Who are you? And where is my wife?”

(Y/N) didn’t respond which made him snap in anger, almost lunging forward and reached behind him, pulling a dagger out and pressing the sharp edge of it against (Y/N)’s neck.

Fear began to fester in her body as her body began to convulse with short rapid breaths and her eyes welled up with tears. The cool sharp edge of the knife was pressing into the side of her neck and she was sure that if she moved, he would have easily sliced across and killed her instantly. She fucked up and didn't tell him the truth in time. Choso was shaking uncontrollably with a mixture of fear and adrenaline. He couldn’t believe his eyes as he began to roar.

“Where is my wife?!”

(Y/N) choked back a cry as she clenched her fists tighter.

“Choso I-”

“Don’t call me Choso!”

She blinked back tears and glanced up at the ceiling. She mustered up whatever courage she could and began trying to defend herself.

“Pardon me, my Lord but I am your wife.”

“That is impossible! I wed to Lady Yorozu of Shiuh Shia. The Duke himself gave her away to me.”

“It was me he gave away. Lady Yorozu was never to be wed to you.”

Choso could not hide his disgust any longer as he shoved (Y/N) away from him. He walked over to the bedroom door and pulled frantically at a cord which rang a bell. Within minutes, there was a frantic knock on the door which Choso swung open. Nanami stumbled in with a frazzled expression on his face. His eyes scanned over Choso before wandering over to the hunched figure that was the Lady.

He couldn't comprehend what happened but readjusted his composure to better present himself to Choso.

"My Lord, is something the matter?"

"Yes. Summon Captain Tsukumo and Fushiguro to the dungeon along with Yuuji. Also tell him to bring his interrogation tools. We need it for this wretched woman."

Nanami stared at the hunched figure in shock, almost hesitating to complete his task when Choso stomped over to the woman. He roughly lifted her up to show her crying face to Nanami, who almost dropped in shock. He couldn't believe his eyes as he bowed before running out of the room to raise the alarm.

Choso gathered both her wrists in one hand before pressing the tip of his blade at her lower back. (Y/N) could do nothing but let Choso unleash his anger on her. It's like the Duke said, she was going to pay the price. As she let herself be dragged by her husband. She kept her head bowed and it wasn't long until they were climbing the stairs down to a dark and dingy room.

It had a dreary atmosphere as Choso grabbed a set of keys from the wall, he unlocked a cell door and tossed her in before locking the door behind her. (Y/N) hissed slightly as the palms of her hands were grazed. Her dress was beginning to gather dirt as she pulled her knees close to her chest.

Two haggard voices echoed from the stairs before a bulky man and woman stood beside Choso. Both were dressed in a simple shirt and trousers whilst an expression of worry took hold on their faces. The blonde haired woman spoke first with a gruff voice.

"What happened, my Lord?"

Choso pointed his dagger at (Y/N), a bitter disdain marking his tone as both figures turned to the direction of the cell. The both of them were stunned at the fact that their commander had jailed this young woman.

"This woman claims that the Duke had given her away as my wife instead of Lady Yorozu."

Was it possible? To Tsukumo, she didn't look to be the malicious type to spread slander. Fushiguro too seemed stunned that this delicate woman had the audacity to claim that she was Viscount Itadori's wife. Both Captains straightened their posture and turned back to their commander.

"Where is Yuuji?"

At that moment, a pitched voice rang from the stairs, whining carelessly.

"Eh, calm down, I'm coming. A man like me needs a long rest to better function in the day."

A rather short skinny figure with pink hair stumbled into the dungeon, lugging behind a heavy case which Nanami was helping him carry. Yuuji eventually heaved the case and rested it against the cell bars, before spinning to face Choso.

"What seems to be the problem, big Bro?"

Choso gestured at the cell to which Yuuji turned to understand. Instead of sharing the same shocked expression the other people had, Yuuji had a curious soft expression on his face as he crouched by the cell to gander at the quivering form of (Y/N).

"Who is this young woman?"

"My wife … so she claims."

Yuuji raised a curious eyebrow as he opened up his case. His hands running over the labels of the vials and bottles.

"I see. Well, I hope they didn't treat you too roughly. Now let's see if we can get you to spill the truth."

Yuuji hummed to himself before finding a small vial with clear liquid inside. He shook the vial before pushing his palm through the gaps of the bars. (Y/N) blankly stared at the vial before snapping back to the surprisingly kind expression on Yuuji's face.

"Hey, whatever your name is, drink this vial if you want to show you're innocent."

(Y/N) was hesitant to take the vial but Yuuji pushed his hand further.

"It's a truth serum-"

A relieved sigh left her lips as she snatched the vial to drink the entire contents. Yuuji was impressed by her eagerness as he crossed his legs.

"Right, who are you?"

"My name is (Y/N) Inumaki and I'm Lady Yorozu's handmaiden."

"Okay, (Y/N), how did you become Choso's wife?"

"A month ago, Viscount Itadori sent a proposal to Duke Kenjaku about proposing to his daughter. The Duke was outraged. But he couldn't refuse the proposal seeing it would make him look bad in the noble society. So he made me take Lady Yorozu’s place and proceed with the wedding."

Fushiguro, Tsukumo and Nanami shared a nervous glance but Choso remained stoic to delve further into the truth.

"How did you know the Duke reacted like this?"

"I overheard him complaining to Lord Zenin of Chaycor. It was he who then came up with the idea to use me as a scapegoat so that the Duke could save face in the aristocracy."

"Why did you agree?"

"It wasn't by choice. He threatened to kill my brother if I didn't comply. He didn't care what happened if Viscount Itadori found out my true identity. He said that I would have to pay the price, which I am now."

Everyone else's nerves dissipated into concern over the young troubled woman. They were sympathetic to the fact that she had no choice. Even Choso felt sorry for the young woman as he still couldn't believe the words coming out of her mouth. He decided to ask the next question.

"Where is Lady Yorozu?"

"She is in Jotron. She is staying there so she could persuade the Emperor to marry her."

“Does she know about this?”

“She does.”

Choso’s expression became more grim and grave at (Y/N)’s answers. Almost as if he didn’t like the truth that was being spoken. (Y/N) was surprised that the truth serum didn't bring out the fact that she was transported into this world. Yuuji clapped his hands and stood up to brush the creases off his clothes.

“Right. Now that the interrogation is over, can we let her out?”

“No, I need you to do one more thing.”

Yuuji dropped his hands and grunted to himself about getting back at his older brother, Choso. Once again crouching by his case and lifting out a pouch. He pulled the strings and poured red powder out onto the palm of his hand. He turned to the cell doors with an apologetic look on his face.

“I’m sorry (Y/N) but I have to do this.”

Before she could ask, he blew the powder right onto her face which had her bring her hands up in defence. The powder was ingested into her nose and sticking to her arms and face. Everyone stood still in anticipation as the red powder clung onto (Y/N)’s skin. (Y/N) slowly dropped her hands to also see what the red powder could do. Minutes passed but nothing seemed to happen.

Choso was confused as he gestured his dagger at (Y/N).

“Why is nothing happening?”

“Probably because she has no magic running through her veins and the truth serum worked just fine. Now! Can we take this woman out of the cell and get her washed up?”

Choso hesitated but Tsukumo stepped forward to justify.

“She’s innocent. She’s not the one to punish. Duke Kenjaku is.”

(Y/N) waited with an unsteady breath as Choso exhaled in surender. Tsukumo was right but Choso didn’t want to admit that he had made a mistake. He took a better look at (Y/N) and felt guilty at the way he treated her but he couldn’t trust her. She could have opened up to him before instead of just when they were about to - Choso shook his head and sheathed his dagger, ordering his subordinates.

“Nanami, get her set up in one of the bedrooms and send a maid to help her wash up. Fushiguro take her to the room. Tsukumo, you help Yuuji take the case to his quarters. I will deal with the rest in the morning.”

With that said, Choso stalked away and left the dungeon. Yuuji grinned and gestured to Tsukumo to lift the heavy case. He spun around to face (Y/N).

“(Y/N) sleep well, and I will meet you for breakfast tomorrow.”

Yuuji then turned away and skipped up the stairs followed by Tsukumo who didn’t seem to be struggling with the case. Fushiguro grabbed the cell keys and unlocked the door, stepping in to hold a hand out to (Y/N), an apologetic smile on his face.

“Apologies my Lady.”

(Y/N) took the offered hand and stood up carefully.

“It’s okay, Sir. I’m the one at fault for deceiving all of you.”

The two of them stepped out of the cell, whilst Nanami stepped forward to sympathise with (Y/N).

“My Lady, you should not apologise. You were simply coerced into conducting the Duke's acts. You were doing your job as a servant."

(Y/N) gave a soft smile to the two of them, glad they were able to forgive and accept her quickly. She hoped that her husband would do the same. That's what he is now. She couldn't get angry at him for the way he had treated her, she could have reacted the same as well. She straightened her posture to follow Fushiguro and Nanami. They were walking through the hallway to get to Lady (Y/N)’s room.

She hugged herself closely as the cold air hit her arms. So far she was following the plot exactly, which was not good because it meant that she and Choso were going to die. She decided to ask one of the two men.

"Sir, what's going to happen now?"

The two of them stopped, staring at each other with unease. Fushiguro turned back to glance at the Lady of the house.

"I'm not sure my Lady. However, I do know that he would not leave you stranded."

"I see. Also why do you address me as 'Lady'? I'm not a noble, I'm just a servant."

Nanami adjusted his sleeves as he addressed (Y/N)'s concern.

"Whilst you may not be a noble by birth, you have become a noble through marriage. It is only right that we address you as Lady."

"Would Viscount Itadori see me as a Lady and his wife?"

Nanami and Fushiguro were unsure of what to say. They knew that Choso would take a long time to get around to (Y/N). However, this betrayal seemed to cut him deeper. Nanami wanted to be realistic but Fushiguro cut in with an optimistic attitude.

"With time he will."

(Y/N) accepted this and both men exhaled with relief. It wasn't long when Nanami finally reached one of the guest rooms, opening the door to a modest sized room. The moonlight was bright enough to make the room clear and visible. Similar arches on the wall with a cream and pale green coloured embellishments. The bed was not a four poster bed but had similar duvets to the other room.

"This will be your room, my Lady. Bear with me a moment as I will fetch a maid for you."

Nanami was about to turn around, when (Y/N) grabbed onto his wrist to stop him going. Fushiguro quirked an amused eyebrow at the fact that (Y/N) had grabbed onto Nanami whereas the said man was in shock at the sudden contact.

"Nanami, please. Don't worry about fetching a maid. I can bathe and dress myself just fine."

(Y/N) let go of his wrist as both men clear their throats to face her. The head housekeeper took a deep breath as he tried to speak.

"But my Lady-"

"Please. I just want to be by myself."

Nanami's tired heart faltered as he exhaled deeply and agreed to her request. Both men excused themselves to let (Y/N) get cleaned up as she opened a door next to the bed to unveil a bathroom. The bath pool was on a raised dais, the taps were on the left as she pushed both of them down to let a mixture of hot and cold water fill the tub. There was a small trolley just before the bath, it had a variety of trays with dried flowers of lavender, honeysuckle and lilies. She lifted the tray of lilies and poured it into the bath, turning off the taps and undressing herself whilst the flowers steeped in the water.

As she sat in the bath, she all but hoped that Choso would allow her to stay. She did not want to create a chain of events that brought hers and Choso’s death early. When she read the story, it ended really poorly with the reader dying to a dream of Choso in her arms. This time she was going to change things where she earnt his love and did whatever she could to prevent their deaths.

#au #jujutsu kaisen #jjk #choso #choso kamo #choso kamo smut #historical au #jjk choso #jjk kamo choso #kamo choso #choso x reader #choso kamo x reader #choso kamo x you #kamo choso jjk

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kanmom51 · 1 year

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Hi. Recently discovered your blog.I am having fun reading it.. You nice keep going 💜

I was just listening to Letter and thinking how fast we moved on from it.

The ending lines from the song literally broke my heart into pieces

🎶because we don't know what days await us,

though it's scary , though we're afraid Never forget that we are together🎶

the way these lines always makes me wanna cry . They are literally sharing with us that they are afraid of what comes ahead in future for them as a couple. The kind of society they are living in. We sometimes tend to forget the kind of fear Jimin and Jungkook must be living with. It must be so hard on them it breaks my heart.

But I know they both are strong and together they are stronger and i want them to know that we jikookers will be there to support them and we all together will be the strongest.

also Jimin wrote this song for Jungkook and no one can change my mind. When Jimin wrote this song Jungkook was on his mind, when Jimin released it as a hidden track Jungkook was on his mind and while Jimin was saying this is a fan song.. Mr.Jungkook was on his mind.

Letter for me stands right next to GCF at Tokyo.

Letter. Omg, I love that song. Can I just sit there and listen to it on repeat? Although not a very good idea, cause I just wouldn't stop crying.

youtube

Those lines at the end, JK joining in, confirming their together, so so beautiful and emotional, and definitely not for Army.

It's not only their own society they fear @youaremyparkfilter.

They know the fandom. They know the good, the bad and the extremely ugly of it. They know that coming out as queer individually will be a big issue for many fans, even more so for JK's stans (it is what it is).

But coming out as a queer couple, that will be a massive earthquake in the fandom. And again, nothing to do with how it will be accepted or rejected in Korea.

In Korea both JM and JK are loved, adored (yes there are haters, but there always are, you just cannot be loved by everyone). People that lifted them to where they are, Princes of Busan, the black and white couple, the sun and moon couple, people that see them as a representation of SK in the world and say it out loud, how loved they are, how proud they are of them.

In saying that, I think that a big lump of those don't actually see them as a queer couple, they just can't envision it, as queer is such an alien notion to them. Even with all their shenanigans. That's the whole glass closet and stretching boundaries within their reality as Kpop idols. Many people, in Korea and out, even if they acknowledge their closeness, do not or will not see beyond it into maybe, just maybe, them being a queer couple.

If they ever do 'come out', there will be those in Korea that do flip flop on them (and I'm not talking about the ones that throw hate at them already), although I personally think not as many as feared. They have been loved for such a long time, it will be harder to turn around and suddenly hate on them (although sometimes the line between love and hate is very thin). Not to mention how hard it will be for people, officials as well, to flip back on calling them the face of Korea, pride of Korea etc.

Make no mistake though, there will be a lot of hate (and it will be very loud, as we all know very well), and their families would receive a big chunk of it (easier/softer targets because of who and what JM and JK and BTS represent).

I think many would take pause, they would perhaps be initially shocked (some not so much, more like a eureka moment for them, like "oh, that explains everything..."), but at the end of the day the blow to their careers won't be the level of Holland's. Because of who they are, because of others that are paving the way (including Holland), because let's be honest here, they are artists and want to continue creating and performing and succeeding, but even if they take a hit their fandom is so friggin huge that whatever happens they will continue to succeed, and I do believe they will gain fans too because of that brave move, because of people realizing just how much their art is representative of themselves. Not to mention the level of impact it will have in Korea for recognition and acceptance of the LGBTQ+ community. In a society like Korea you have the very loud anti LGBTQ+ religious groups, you have those with the old fashioned backwards way of thinking, you have those that don't think or care either way (as long as it doesn't concern them) and you have those that are part of the LGBTQ+ community or support it and their fight for equal rights and protection by law. On that spectrum I believe you will find that a big piece of society can be swayed. And people like that who will see these two young men who they have grown to love come out as queer, they can have a change of mind, a moment of enlightenment/ realization that perhaps love is love is love. Maybe that's me being over optimistic, but I really don't think so. Because that's how change is made. That is how change was made in the West.

But, there will always be a price, and all of this is purely speculation (no way of me knowing just how bad it could get for them). It's their lives, their safety, their careers on the line and they are the ones that are living this reality and having to hide who they are and who they love at the moment, and will be living this conundrum on a daily basis.

So to sum it up, I believe there will be a hit but not a crushing one to their careers if they ever do decide to take that step. I'm not expecting it of them though. I know it will be a huge step forward for the LGBTQ+ community in SK if they do, but it's their lives, their careers, their loved ones, their decision.

It's a bloody scary thing to do, and it impacts not only them but also their families, their loved ones, their bandmates. This is a decision they will have to make together, and they will most likely make some sort of decision post MS. One way or another, I think things will change post MS. Contracts will change too. Just how much it will change, that is the million dollar question.

God, did I digress....

After saying all of that, I do want to back pedal a bit to your ask and to those specific lines in Letter.

I think they engulf not only the fear of being a queer couple in an unfriendly society, but also the upcoming uncertain future of military service, being apart for such a long time after being together for what seems like forever, not being able to be there for each other in this oh so scary new reality of military service that is looming over them. The uncertainty of this time to come and what lies ahead. All of that is engulfed into those lines of the song.

Anyway, the song is beautiful.

The song is a love song. And we aren't the recipients of said letter, said love song.

Letter is a song for JK disguised as a song for army.

Letter is addressed to JK, for army to hear.

#`ask

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im-a-regular-joe · 1 month

Text

MY THEORIES ON VAL

The most obvious place to start upon analysing such a character would be to start with his name: Valentino. One of the most popular things associated with this is the designer brand of the same name. Said brand is often known for its high prices, which could translate to Valentino himself having expensive taste.

This is confirmed as we find out soon enough that he almost certainly overworks his employees likely paying less than they deserve. This could also lead to the idea that other peoples opinions are very important to him. By wearing expensive clothing and high fashion, he may be hoping to appeal to others he sees as being higher than himself, and with his overlord status that cannot be very many. This then offers the possibility of an inferiority complex and lack of true self worth if he still feels the need to try so hard to appeal to everybody despite being of equal power. It could also reference a sensitive nature and fear of rejection due to not being good enough.

Another symbol within Valentino’s name can easily be its close resemblance to Valentine. Valentine's day, of course, being the celebration of love, is often associated with hearts, which Valentino displays on the fur collar around his neck and in the shape of his glasses. All these things can easily combine to not so subtly present a man who enjoys the idea of being loved and presents a possibly needy character if he feels he must go so far out of his way to show how much he likes the idea. It presents us with a character that may feel that he needs an excuse to be loved, just as Valentine's day is no more than an excuse to show affection to those you should show love to regardless of the day. But that could also completely miss the point. Alternatively, it could be a reference to the Valentine's day that it really is: one day a year where people pretend love is simply shown in a card or a box of chocolates. By many is seen as an overly advertised cheap ideal of romance. Valentino could therefore possibly be the kind of character that enjoys a short-lived good time with little effort rather than somebody willing of commitment and resilience in a relationship. This isn’t surprising, given his profession related primarily to sex and lust over romance and commitment. We know this to be a fact as we look further into his on again off again relationship with Vox, who he appears often abusive towards. There must be an excessively good reason that the other overlord keeps returning, and I personally doubt it's for a long time given the apparent dynamic. Valentine’s day is only for one day a year, which can represent Valentino’s quickly changing emotions. We see he is easily angered by things, but this day could possibly show that he is also easily won over again by the simple gestures on valentine's day. His love appears to be purchasable with gifts rather than genuine acts of kindness. Or perhaps, he sees it as the other way around. We are quite aware that Valentino keeps his workers under contract that they likely aren’t allowed to leave, so perhaps he believes he can buy their commitment with just one special day. Either way, the audience are still inclined to believe that he is a shallow person and continue to feel he is not a character that they would like to romanticise.

Moving on from the name, Valentino’s species is a sensible place to continue from. Being a moth demon opens up a lot of possible symbolism, so expect a few paragraphs. Let's start off with the fact that moths are often overshadowed by other animals in society. They are often seen as pests, which many people see Valentino as anyway. In comparison to the largely considered more beautiful butterfly, moths are often considered to be quite ugly insects too. This could possibly emphasise the previously mentioned inferiority that Valentino feels, which he makes up for with his designer fashion labels. It could also refer to how, morally, Valentino has committed

some excessively “ugly” acts both in life and death. Children are taught more about butterflies from a young age rather than moths, which also symbolises how Valentino is the kind of guy you don’t talk about to children. However, by teaching children only of butterflies so they later discover moths makes them, even as adults, often see a more beautiful moth but instantly consider it a butterfly because of simply learning that it is the more beautiful species.

This can show that, even if Valentino were to do good things, a large majority of the audience watching already have these views built into their minds about him and will ignore the act or find some sort of ulterior motive behind it. Valentino may have only gained this reputation in Hell, or when he became a pimp, but if you take a moment to consider that he may have grown up with those attitudes towards him, then you may start to understand that he had to take that societal role. A lot of people headcanon that, before his death, Valentino was a person of colour, and if this is true then it is quite possible that he was subjected to systemic racism and was forced into this role from childhood and is a product of what a cruel society forced him to be. But that is just a theory, now back to moths. In the wider food chain, moths are right at the bottom. Many don’t even eat at all, but an immense number of other animals feed on moths as a main source of food. If demons have instincts related to their species, it's unlikely that Valentino could be around other demons without at least feeling unnerved. This may be the source of the feeling of inferiority I have previously discussed to the point where it's probably boring you, but I’m not skipping over it. Valentino’s closest companions, from what we have seen so far, are Vox and Velvet: neither of which are animals above him in the food chain, being a tv and a doll.

It wouldn’t be surprising if he feels more comfortable around these two because they are not naturally a threat to him. However, Angel Dust being a spider, one of the most famous predators towards a moth, may now be cast to be his eventual demise. But there is no way of knowing such so far. It all represents Valentino as quite a vulnerable character despite everything else, which may create sympathy or he may simply be used to show the weaknesses of people such as Valentino, as it is simply poetic justice to see his failures in the end.

More about moths, but different enough to warrant a new paragraph, is that they are nocturnal creatures, notably attracted to light. Night is often a euphemism referring to sexual activities, demonstrating that area to be one Valentino is not only made to be in, but most comfortable in. However, the true symbolism behind this is that Valentino is clearly more comfortable in the dark, though attracted to light. Considering the connotations, it's quite clear that Valentino, while possibly aspiring to be good, will forever be much more comfortable in the more sinister side of things. Moths have evolved to be in the dark, which fits in with the previous suggestion that systemic racism forced the evil nature onto Valentino, to the point where he feels he can no longer go back. Alternatively, it could be that Valentino was raised in an environment similar to the one he now runs, as moths adapted to stay in the same sort of environment and not change. This implies that he likely has trauma, or more specifically, possible sexual assault at a young age. But this is still simply a theory. Another implication about the moths coming out at night is how light is naturally painful to them. Valentino notably wears tinted glasses, and it is highly likely that these have a more practical purpose than simply being fashion, and likely defend his eyes from the daylight. Vox, being a tv demon, has a natural light. It's possible that this hurts, or at least irritates Valentino, to the point where he feels he must lash out on the other to make him feel equal pain. This is no justification for what he does, but it's possible that it is a reason he feels the need to attack someone with such power. Alternatively, the pain of the light could symbolise how morally good acts hurt Valentino. It's unlikely that it is physical pain, but Angel Dust being rehabilitated will definitely hurt Valentino economically, and possibly emotionally despite how cruel he is to him at the studios. Living in darkness and shying away from the light, however, not typically what the crowd wants in a show with the primary goal of redemption, which easily paints Valentino as the antagonist we know him to be.

A final thing we can possibly gain from Valentino’s species is development. Moths famously go through the transformation from a caterpillar, just as butterflies do. An evolution to something more beautiful could foreshadow a positive redemption arc for the pimp throughout the series, but it quite possibly could show that it will never happen. Valentino is already a moth, which is the end of the transformation. It’s likely we will not see further development of his character, or at least nothing significant. This is most likely his final form which will not change, as depressing as that may be. Audiences should see that this man is past the point of change and will lose the hope that they may have once had that he could improve, which makes his character even less appealing to those watching, confirming Valentino as a primary antagonist.

Now let's focus on his design. Red is the most prominent colour shown on Valentino, in his coat and his hat. Red is stereotypically a colour representing stereotypical and romance, which reiterates the earlier statement of Valentino’s attraction to the depiction of a romantic relationship. It can also represent anger, presenting him to be a character that will be easy to make angry and be a threat during the series. Red can also symbolise danger, or a lack of inhibitions, relating once again to anger but also the impulsive abuse he shows to those around him. Red is also the colour blood, therefore has connotations including murder and violence. The use of blood is famously used in the play Macbeth, where it is shown to be unable to be washed off of characters hands. This could represent how Valentino is not a character who will change his ways and will forever be damned to Hell. Red is a strong colour made to stand out from the crowd, which may be a way of showing that Valentino feels the need to be noticed while also displaying that he himself is strong and bold. It shows that he fits into Hell easily as he matches the colours, just as how a moth's wings are often used to camouflage them in their habitat. The entire outfit reiterates how Valentino believes fashion and looks to be very important for status and control. The dangerous colour instantly opposes people to the character and makes them feel threatened by his existence, exaggerating that he is a primary villain.

Valentino’s skin is shown to be a muted blue colour. Due to it being skin, this is not something that can easily be changed or hidden in any way, so is likely to be truer to his genuine character. Blue has connotations primarily around the motif of sadness, which may suggest that Valentino isn’t so carefree in his afterlife as he appears. It may show a better, more caring side to the pimp, despite the harsh exterior he displays. “Muted” suggests that it is certainly a side to him that wouldn’t be voiced, so true or not we are unlikely to see it. This may cause a slight bit of sympathy from the observer despite the current opposition. However, often in official images released of Valentino, his skin appears closer to purple. This is famous for being a royal colour and is generally used by those who want to give off an impression of superiority. It is possible that, due to the light in hell being mostly red, that the blue naturally appears purple, or it may be that, specifically for the Instagram posts, Valentino edited the lighting to give him the more regal look so he could demonstrate his superiority. It shows a self-conscious side to him, as he possibly is embarrassed of the blue undertone, knowing its symbolism of sadness, so as often as he can he covers it to look more purple. Yet it may just be a coincidence. Either way, it once again confirms that Valentino is important in Hell.

Arguably, pink, although only a very small part of Valentino, is the truest colour to him. His eyes are something that cannot easily be changed colour either, especially since it is the entire eye, which makes it one of his most true colours. Pink typically represents self-love and passion in literature. It could be that in Valentino’s eyes we see what he truly wishes for, in this case a strong sense of self appreciation and love from others. More simply, passion could refer more so to sex, which we know already firs his character. Valentino’s teeth, all but one, are also pink. This could represent that he feeds off of passion and love others give to him, exaggerating the possibly neediness mentioned before. Alternatively, being a pimp, it could show how he feeds off of others passion in a more literal way, by getting money from the sex industry. It could also show a more feminine side to Valentino, which can sometimes be seen in official content released. It adds an element of confusion, making the character unpredictable and a source of danger to the observer.

A minor colour on Valentino that can be seen is gold. Obviously, this represents power and wealth, so may be a fashion statement to try and prove superiority. However, gold teeth specifically are used in the media to show criminals and those who would rather spend money on things that needn’t be so expensive rather than helping others, showing him to be selfish. Being a tooth, it could represent that he feeds off of wealth and craves more money as part of his business, emphasising the idea. A similar gold tooth is owned by Angel Dust, likely showing Valentino’s possession of him with a sort of trademark. This causes him to be viewed as antagonistic as modern society views people as much more than property.

The final colour to discuss is black. This is used on Valentino’s hands, or possibly gloves. Black is known as a colour to represent evil and fear, so being on Valentino’s hands gives the impression that he has done undoubtably evil things with them which we know to be true. They are clearly shown as impure, to which nobody has doubts that they are. It causes an instant dislike towards him and unnerves the audience at the things he could have done. There is the chance that these are gloves, and not the true colour of Valentino’s hands, but that can either be simply to give the impression that he does horrible things to make others fear him, or he considers what he does to be too evil to physically touch, so continues to demonise him to the audience.

Another thing that is difficult to miss when looking at Valentino is his height. Even compared to the other tall demons we have seen, Valentino has a significant height advantage, standing at around three metres tall. This means he literally looks down on those around him, which is an obvious symbol of power. This could prove the inferiority complex wrong, and perhaps he does feel superior because of this, though it could simply mean he has more of a reputation to hold up and more eyes on him. Being so tall creates a literal and metaphorical distance between him and others, making it impossible to be close to people without having to lower or humble himself, which doesn’t seem something he’s likely to do. It shows Valentino being likely to be a very large and obvious obstacle in the show, specifically for Angel Dust, who will have to find some way to get around him to succeed in redemption.

Finally, the fluff around Valentino’s neck. Primarily it is white, which shows comfort and purity, but can occasionally be classed as weakness. It is possible, being so close to his head, that it is more of a quick retreat to hide away from Hell in somewhere soft and pure for a short time. Or, it being such a pure colour, it may show his pure emotions, because who doesn’t want to see it go all poofy when he’s mad? Either way, it slightly softens his character to the audience, though doesn’t necessarily cause any sympathy. The fluff is known to have red hearts on it, which further reiterate that Valentino’s comfort is the stereotypical idea of romance, which he seems to find appealing and safe within. This, of all things discussed, is likely one of the only things that will truly soften the audience towards the pimp, making him seem more than the purely evil villain he is perceived as. Then again, it's unlikely that a ruff will redeem the whole character to the audience, especially regarding his other aspects and actions.

What do you think ??

#hazbin hotel husk #hazbin analysis #valentino #valentino hazbin hotel #hazbin valentino #hazbin hotel valentino #hazbin hotel #hazbin hotel angel dust #hazbin angel dust #angel dust #charlie morningstar #asmodeus #helluva boss asmodeus #sin of lust #lust #hazbin the vees #vox hazbin hotel #hazbin vox

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tozettastone · 1 month

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RE: "there's so little F/F fanfiction," and its supposed relationship to misogyny, unexamined "fandom truly hates women," statements, and also why "eating your veggies" ala dutyfic is all kind of... inadequate and poorly expressed, in my view (and in my experience, as an AFAB person).

"Fandom hates women," is a statement that's usually written as though the person writing it does not hate women themselves. I think feminists who can't acknowledge their own misogyny are probably living the unexamined life (sorry, Socrates).

These people are right that misogyny is a problem. But they are wrong about how, why, and whether or not the amount of F/F fanfiction or female character-centric works is a proxy for measuring it.

I think there must be room to accept that among the people who happen to be assigned female at birth, even the most liberated suffer from some amount of internalised misogyny — or even just the relentless examination of their own thoughts in trying to root out the misogyny they know is in there. It's an ugly thing people really try to pretend isn't real. Feminists are also misogynists. Society has raised us all ugly and correcting it is a lifestyle, not a one-and-done deep clean.

Sometimes we've thought about it so much that every line of text is haunted by the long shadow of that misogyny. I know I often start and don't finish, or finish and just don't post, my f/f fanfics. It's not just because it attracts more harassment (although it sure used to, at least; I don't know now), but also because I overthink what I'm putting into the world: Is her vulnerability in this moment an attitude of feminine weakness? Is her stoicism just me the writer falling into a bland stoic butch trope because it's easy? Am I replicating gendered things I hate in M/F fanfiction but don't notice in F/F? Is this just writing in character, or is it a sexist stereotype? Hey, what if writing "in character" IS a sexist stereotype? What does this female character, a representative of her entire constructed identity, say about women? Shall I write another scene where she cuts her soft hair and rejects pink girly things and takes her job ever so seriously as part of a power fantasy, in which the excision of femininity goes hand in hand with the attainment of that power?

Every line of text might be a new enfilade in the long identity war. It's Schrodinger's sexism. Who's reading? What will this imply? What will they infer?

I just feel like, personally, until you can exist in society as someone that other people view as a woman, in a way that isn't being perpetually dissected and examined (by yourself, by others, by the people who feel insecure and defensive and want to respond to this saying "uhmmm sweetie that's YOUR problem, I'm an enlightened woman who genders and fucks how I want actually, YOU'RE the only misogynist here, you just suck," as though that's not yet another permutation of exactly the high-pressure, high-critique behaviour I just described), there will simply be fewer people putting their writing about female characters (and by extension F/F) into the public eye, and fewer people who want to do that writing at all.

It's just so fucking exhausting. I think it must be nice, sometimes, writing deathly boring (to me) M/F romance that openly embraces gender stereotypes, where she's always taken by surprise, and he's always competent. Ha.

But then you attempt a M/M romance, and you have to think, "isn't writing masculinity as the totally unexamined default actually kind of an act of collusion, too?" It doesn't have to be. But it sure can be, when you feel like this. And then you throw your laptop out the window. (I'm writing this on my phone. How did you guess?)

You have to draw a line somewhere, horribly, between your existence in a politicised body, your representation of politicised bodies in your art, and your existence as an individual who wants to enjoy their fucking hobby.

Maybe that means you delete all your social media accounts and go herd goats on a mountainside. Or you write about aliens for five years and give them whatever genitals you feel like today. But, like, listen. It's going to be fine. Gender is made up. I know, I know, pretty much everyone else thinks it's a holy binary, just like good and evil, and you have to live in the same world with them, sending coded gender messages all day every day and unable to stop. I know. But it is made up anyway.

Key takeaways: People should write whatever they enjoy writing and kind of just worry less about it. Worrying isn't helping you make fun art. And the amount of fanfiction about female characters and F/F relationships is a poor proxy for whatever we think we mean when we say, "fandom hates women."

#tozette.txt #just venting lol #I do not write long unhinged posts like this very often anymore #but what's a blog for if not to have a whinge about fandom wank now and again #fandom wank

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punkeropercyjackson · 4 months

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Egg Percy Jackson evidence masterpost

Considers traditional masculinity a burden,weird,confusing and gross(see her calling Ares ugly + Finding Apollo extremely annoying for acting like a stereotypical guy)but forces it onto herself because she's desperate to fit in and be accepted

Thinks women are better than men

Almost all her friends in the og series were girls(Annabeth,Silena,Clarisse,Thalia,Zoe,Bianca and Rachel vs just Grover,Nico and Beckendorf)

The first gay male character in the series stopped crushing on her because he realized she's not the ideal man he thought she was

Her relathionship with him is also very eldest sister/middle brother-esque

Her most common clothing item is hoodies(dysphoria)

Almost all the gods who treat her badly are men while almost all her positive relathionships with them are with the goddesses,including Artemis who is very famous for disliking men and protecting young girls

Persephone,who's most significant and solid myth is about men's violence against women(Hymn to Demeter),canonically likes her for being 'different' from other 'male' halfbloods

Generally relates to other female characters more than she does male ones

Best friends to lovers to exes turned even closer best friends is a very common experience for irl trans women with afab wlw and this is her canon dynamic with Rachel

Was jealous of Thalia because wanted to be like her,Thalia being a girl who defies and spits in the face of society's expectations of women but is still very proudly a girl and gets pissed when people try to erase that

Frequently describes women she finds pretty in an enchanted and awed way,which combined with all the prev points is most definitely gender envy

The Titan's Curse,the book where she enters teenagehood,had a huge focus on how she's 'not like other men' by the Hunters,who in the og myths were pretty much a metaphor for 'lesbians',if not outright interested in women and rejecting men as romantic options

Only ship them platonically but Annabeth never really shows attraction to characters she thinks are men other than her and Luke and she straight up said she never actually loved the latter romantically and always saw him as an older brother and was just confused because of how young she was so this makes both her being a lesbian and Percy being a trans woman click perfectly together

Specifically them being butch4femme since Annabeth is a tomboy who hates girlyness for herself and Percy as per stated before dosen't wanna be masc.Also,daughter of the king of Atlantis?'Her hair was curly,like a princess'?Gender envy strikes again!!

She acts like a Mom Friend very often,especially to younger characters,and i'm allowed to say that because i'm afab and a Mom Friend myself

Rick has commented on her sexuality but never her gender so it's not like it's been debunked

A joke one but Blackjack was called a mare in SOM yet a stallion from TTC onward so trans horse boy and his trans horse girl owner

Luke's relathionship with her heavily parallels his to Annabeth,Thalia and Silena so it's not a stretch to say this is unintentional subtext of her being a girl like them and him picking up on her vulnerability like he did them(Not in a 'chilvarious' way btw)

Jason and her remind me of many common main m/f romance tropes-The 'hotheaded girl x levelheaded boy' classic,tall girlfriend and slighter taller boyfriend,contrasting in a complimentary way powers,iirc it being obvious to everyone they instantly liked eachother(feel free to correct me and i'll remove this),Team Parents to the babies of the cast and 'Sweet Sixteen' joke since Percy met her first boyfriend at that age.Worth noting that this would make Percy Jason's best friend who's a girl and that he broke with Piper because their feelings for eachother were shallow and their dating dynamic was too by extent

Similarly,Percy and Annabeth fall under the 'dark haired female protagonist and her tomboy blonde best friend' trope that was so popular 2000s/2010s

More so motifs i think work well than evidence but sea related things are usually associated with femininity-Calling ships 'she',mermaids,pearl jewelry,the moon controlling the tides,the term 'Beach Bunny',etc

Her random reinforments of her 'manhood' are very inconsistent with the rest of her personality and we're given no indication Sally raised her on gender roles so it's less Percy being Percy and more Rick being a cis man

Rick also agreed with the headcanon she loves Led Zepplin so i googled to find out if they were lgbt and they weren't but what i learned was enough to let me know they're a hit with lgbt people for a reason

Again,just my own take,but i feel her being pastel and kidcore is more fitting than any other interests and style for her in addition to her being canonically punk and they're both in-character for her since she's got a positive opinion on girly girls and the second one is an excellent coping mechanism for constant childhood trauma

She's at most in-character,well-written and realistic when she just lets herself be instead of trying to be what everyone wants her to and to be brutally honest,this includes the fandom.She's a femme trans woman and i'm right

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dailyanarchistposts · 27 days

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Four months into the assault on Gaza, the Israeli military has forced over a million refugees to the edge of the Egyptian border and is now bombing them while threatening to mount a ground assault against them. In the following text, Jonathan Pollak, a longtime participant in Anarchists Against the Wall and other anti-colonial solidarity efforts, explains why we should not look to international institutions or protest movements within Israeli society to put a stop to the genocide in Gaza and calls on ordinary people to take action.

A shorter version of this text was rejected by the liberal Israeli platform Haaretz—an indication of the diminishing space for dissent in Palestine and within Israeli society.

Human Rights Discourse Has Failed to Stop the Genocide in Gaza

We are now more than 120 days into the unprecedented Israeli assault on Gaza. Its horrific repercussions and our inability to bring it to an end should compel us to reevaluate our perspective on power, our understanding of it, and, most significantly, what we have to do to fight it.

Amid the spilled blood, the endless days of death and destruction, excruciating dearth, starvation, thirst, and despair, the ceaseless nights of fire and brimstone and white phosphors raining indiscriminately from the sky, we must grapple with the bare ugly facts of reality and reshape our strategies.

The officially reported fatalities—in addition to the many Palestinians who remain buried under the rubble and aren’t yet included in the official count—already amount to the annihilation of nearly 1.5% of all human life in the Gaza Strip. As Israel escalates its attacks on Rafah, it seems that there is no end in sight. Soon, the lives of one in every fifty people in Gaza will have been extinguished.

The Israeli military is inflicting an unprecedented toll of suffering and death on the 2.3 million people of Gaza, surpassing anything ever witnessed in Palestine—or elsewhere during the 21st century. Yet these staggering figures have not penetrated the thick layers of dissociation and disconnect that characterize Israeli society as well as Israel’s Western allies. If anything, the reduction of this tragedy to statistics seems to hinder rather than enhance our understanding. It presents a whole that obscures the specifics: the figures conceal the personhood of the countless individuals who have died painful, particular deaths.

At the same time, the unfathomable scale of the massacre in Gaza makes it impossible to comprehend through the stories of individual victims. Journalists, street cleaners, poets, homemakers, construction workers, mothers, doctors, and children, a multitude too vast to be narrated. We are left with faceless anonymous figures. Among them are more than 12,000 children. Probably a lot more.

Please pause and say this aloud, word by word: over twelve thousand children. Killed. Is there a way for us to take this in and move beyond the realm of statistics to grasp the horrific reality?

The cold blunt numbers also veil hundreds of obliterated families, many of them completely erased—sometimes three, even four generations, wiped off the face of the earth.

Overshadowed by these figures are more than 67,000 people who have been injured, thousands of whom will remain paralyzed for the rest of their lives. The medical system in Gaza has been almost completely destroyed; life-saving amputations are being carried out without anesthetics. The extent to which infrastructure in Gaza has been destroyed surpasses the Dresden bombings at the end of the Second World War. Nearly two million people—roughly 85% of the population of the Gaza Strip—have been displaced, their lives shattered by Israeli bombings as they shelter in the dangerously overcrowded south of the Strip, which the Israeli government falsely pronounced “safe,” yet continues to pummel with hundreds of 2000-pound bombs. The hunger in Gaza, which was created by Israeli state policy even before the war, is so severe that it amounts to famine. In their despair, people have resorted to eating fodder, but now even that is running out.

About a month ago, an acquaintance of mine who fled to Rafah from Gaza City after his home there was bombed told me that he and his family had already been forced to move from one temporary refuge to another six different times in their attempts to escape from the bombs. In despair, he said, “There is no food, no water, nowhere to sleep. We are constantly thirsty, hungry, and wet. I’ve already had to dig my children out from under the rubble twice—once in Gaza and once here in Rafah.”

These rivers of blood must breach the walls of our apathy. If only time could stop long enough for all of us to process our grief. But it will not. It continues passing as more bombs fall on Gaza.

Decades of injustice have paved the way for this. Some 75 years have passed since the Nakba—75 years of Israel’s settler-colonialism—yet its defenders continue to deny the facts. Even after the the International Court of Justice (ICJ) asserted that there is indeed cause to fear that genocide is being committed in Gaza, the US and many of Israel’s other Western allies have effectively remained silent.

Israeli Prime Minister, Benjamin Netanyahu, called the court’s mere willingness to discuss the case “a disgrace that will not be erased for generations.” Indeed, the ruling is a disgrace. Despite everything being laid bare in plain sight, the court did not order Israel to cease fire. This is a disgrace to the court itself and to the very idea that international law is supposed to protect the lives and rights of those being crushed by the military force of nations.

It will undoubtedly be said that the law, by nature, is meticulous and that it considers the forest not as a whole but as individual trees. To that, we must answer that reality, facts, common sense must be above the law, not beneath it. Israel dedicates considerable resources to a legalism of the battlefield, intended to give cover to its murderous acts. This approach involves carving reality into thin slices of independently legally-approved observations and actions. A military target was present in high-rise X, justifying the deaths of over two dozen uninvolved civilians; apartment tower Y was the home of a Hamas-employed firefighter, legitimizing, according to the principle of proportionality, the decision to wipe out three neighboring families. But this practice cannot turn genocidal water into legitimate wine. This is legal gaslighting that shreds reality to pieces in order to conceal a pattern of indiscriminate mass murder.

If the slaughter of 1.5% of the population in four months is not genocide; if Israel’s acts are not deemed grievous enough for the court to order it to immediately stop the killing, not even in light of open incitement to exterminate Palestinians by prominent Israeli politicians and members of the press, not to mention Israel’s president and Prime Minister; when lack of punishment for such incitements and such acts is accepted rather than branded as genocide in the simplest of terms—then the words we use to describe reality have lost all meaning and we are in dire need of new language beyond the confines of legalese.

Leaving the butcher’s knife in the butcher’s hand—leaving Israel unhindered, unimpeded—means letting the slaughter in Gaza continue. This is the absolute ongoing failure of international law and the institutions entrusted with keeping it.

This failure passes on the responsibility of forcing an end to the ongoing catastrophe, so that it falls on the shoulders of civil society. This ought to compel us to move beyond the empty liberal paradigms of human rights, which have replaced liberation as the dominant discourse in leftist politics.

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ilynpilled · 1 year

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i like overthinking this sorry ok so what’s interesting about the whole jaime sitting on the throne “just to sit down” bc it is just a chair bit is that yes, jaime has a particular disillusioned relationship with that symbol of power, and the thing is that that chair is like a gazillion meters up in the air or whatever so i do think it is a bit more complicated than just him having to sit down after #allthat, he could have very well just sat on the stairs lol. there was a more conscious decision being made on his part.

and this whole exchange is more about parallax, about an outside interpretation rather than what is canonically going on in jaime’s head. and i get that a lot of people think it is mostly “a remnant from the original outline”, but i do not think that means george wrote it with the intention for it to lock on a specific trajectory, i think it is a seed that can be gardened however he pleases, especially because of some heavy foreshadowing with him in agot already for many things that i think are pretty incompatible with that original outline. i do think there is a reframing happening in asos with that action and we can still make sense of it. but neither ned or robert were correct.

jaime’s experience leaves him with a very interesting mindset when it comes to “right” to absolute power like the throne. the image of a king figure gets torn down in every way: aerys obviously becomes a destructive person who was still born with right to that power, and him having that power has devastating consequences, but what also sticks with jaime is that contradiction in his death. how he dies in such an ugly human way. there really is nothing differentiating him from the lowborn rossart, in fact, rossart seems to have died with more dignity. the whole “equal in death/not equal in life” thing. the vulnerability of a king. i do find the “sword across the knee” bit interesting, bc it does mean denying guest right in the north. i wonder if that is just meant to play into a ned/jaime conflict and misunderstanding, or if george is insinuating with that imagery that jaime is guarding the seat in a more abstract way, and sending a message with his existence (especially considering what his role and the whole wildfire plot in the story being stopped and a king being murdered by a kg means on a less personal scale: the whole analysis of ‘what is power and who holds it?’ that permeates this series), almost like a warning, considering what goes through his head before he climbs up there. anyway, i do read it as an act of conscious ‘defiance’ of some kind though. if we go beyond what a 17 year old jaime can fully grasp at that point, he did break the social order by murdering his king as a kingsguard and that has implications in their world. that is an interesting precedent. and then jaime is so disillusioned by social contracts of this sort that he sees no difference between his act and the act of robert, ned & co, which is why he is so particularly frustrated by what he views as hypocrisy, ntm that robert tore the realm apart with his war in his mind and he rues him too. and then ofc with ned’s commentary of “he had no right to that throne”, like this is just the mindset of society, it is built on these constructs of rights and oaths etc, and they all serve a purpose in reinforcing a status quo. jaime all throughout the present text shows no concern for, or even an active rejection of, this construct of ‘right’ to that throne. like he does seem to view the whole thing like: “you can win that power with swords, power resides where people think it does, what does the rest matter?” (as per his targ romance with cersei delusion passage) so many of his thoughts and actions imply this rejection of the construct of inherent right to that power, especially through birth. he also does not view it as something with that much ‘worth’ in terms of what it means for the individual. it gets as overt as it can with “how much can a crown be worth, if a crow can dine upon a king?” etc. i do not doubt all this also bleeds into his continued rejection of his role as heir to some extent. and it all feels like the effect the aerys experience/robert’s rebellion would have on him and his relationship to power. though i do think in some way he does still crave an “aerys anti-thesis”, a “good king” he does not rue, and he can acknowledge this desire more when hope is rekindled in him. anyway, i do think him sitting on that throne is a symbolic gesture, maybe even a form of taking back control through diminishing its value, even more hard-hitting considering he does not want the throne himself, and then belittles it even more with his words afterwards.

and what is also cool to me is that there is a motif with jaime’s golden sword: ned especially is so fixated on it being tainted by blood, especially of his king, it is an image that he and others keep conjuring, it exists in the collective consciousness.

and then what that passage reveals is that jaime’s golden sword does something very different than become tainted with blood in his nightmares. it is not killing a king, it is cutting down an endless stream of burning corpses. it also reveals that jaime is still haunted by something that never happened. i find it interesting that his conscious often goes to ned, even in the fever dream he expects him to come out, but he is wrong there too, just like how he is not the one that haunts his dreams in general. he even acknowledges it: “The moss covered it so thickly he had not noticed before, but now he saw that the wood was white. It made him think of Winterfell, and Ned Stark’s heart tree. It was not him, he thought. It was never him.” things are still much deeper than just that palpable and damning judgement he received for his finest act from that man, who in many ways embodied the ‘hypocrisy of honor’ in jaime’s mind.

#jaime lannister #valyrianscrolls

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