#one of the worst parts of being on here after i watched the livestream
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I'm excited about NMT2. You know what I'm not excited for?
The impending Sam hate
#ash talks#nmt2#hatchetfield universe#sam sweetly#one of the worst parts of being on here after i watched the livestream#was people hating on sam#and I'm tired#like i saw a meme#that was like#sam's in NMT2 (disgusted Tom Houston face)#he might die (happy Tom Houston face)#and i dunno#it's early#I'm tired#I'm rambling at this point
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Brain Curd #28
Brain Curds are lightly edited flash fiction, posted daily and usually written with the intention of being terrible… in an endearing way. Please enjoy.
“All rise for the honorable Judge Peters.”
The robed judge approached his perch and took a seat. He donned a pair of reading glasses and looked at the document in front of him.
“Good morning, counsel. Do I have this correct? The case I’ll be hearing today is The Characters v. Cassandra Erica, Author?”
“That is correct,” replied the plaintiff attorney. “Operating as representative of The Characters, I am Edgar Wordly, Esquire.”
“Hm.” The judge said. “With a name like that, I take it you’re part of this class?”
“Indeed I am, your honor.”
“You may explain why to the court in your opening statement. Where is the defense’s representation?”
“Right here, your honor,” I replied.
The judge looked around the courtroom, confused. “Where are you?”
“I am everywhere and nowhere, all seeing yet rarely being. I am The Narrator, representing the defendant, Cassandra Erica. As I tend to do.”
“Well, thank you both for being here… for lack of a better phrase. Mr. Worldly, your opening statements.”
“That’s Wordly, your honor.”
“Apologies, my mistake.”
Actually, it was a typo.
“People of the jury,” Wordly began. “Have you ever felt cursed by God himself? Doomed to face your very worst fears head-on and suffer the consequences, leaving you scarred for the rest of your life?”
Daniel Smith, sitting in the gallery, rubbed the mark on his left hand.
“Or worse, have you felt abandoned by that same God, created and left in obscurity, never to be permitted to see the outside world?”
Daniel Mildlike, sitting next to Smith, scoffed and leaned over to whisper. “I was supposed to get my own detective mystery screenplay, but she got bored of me.”
The truth was, Dan Mildlike was a really dumb name and a rip-off of Dirk Gently - which Cassandra hadn’t even read. She still hasn’t read Dirk Gently. It’s unclear why.
Wordly continued. “I, personally, was created as nothing more than a name made up by an entirely different character - a cartoon slug, no less - and languished in obscurity until I was able to go to law school and pass the bar exam, simply so that my name was no longer a lie. Yes, that’s right - Esquire is my surname. The defendant did not bother to look up what it meant when she brought me into existence.”
Oofus and Doofus, watching via livestream, looked at each other.
“Do you remember that?” Oofus asked.
“I’m fairly certain it was just a snippet of dialogue she thought was funny and wrote down in Evernote after waking up from a strange dream.” Doofus replied. “It’s nice to have something to say, now, isn’t it?”
“Too bad this is the last of it for a while.”
“Now, imagine,” Wordly strutted back and forth before the jury. “Living through this sort of torture over and over again, through several drafts - perhaps dozens - or even alternate universes!”
Kris, Kris, and Chris looked at each other, nodding. Three takes on Mary began to weep, and the six comforted one another.
“But that’s just what might happen as the protagonist, the character who is given a chance at redemption. What if you’re the antagonist, the one who for the sake of the plot must do evil things and be shown doing them, despite no desire to perform these acts? It is the ultimate form of libel.”
“Well,” Shirley Jones said, elbowing his neighbor. “It’s not that I had no desire to see that dyke burn.” He chuckled.
Veronica scooted to the other side of her seat. That man made her uncomfortable.
“In summary, Cassandra Erica, as an author, has put every one of us through an undeniable and unending deluge of pain. It is up to all of you as the jury to decide what sort of compensation that is worth, though it is hard to put a number on it. I suggest fifty million dollars. Thank you.”
The judge cleared his throat, even though he really didn’t need to, in order to provide a good way to tag his dialogue without overuse of the word ‘said.’ “The defense may now offer their rebuttal.”
“Thank you, your honor,” I replied. I would have stood up, but I have no physical being, so I just began talking. “People of the jury, have you ever considered what non-existence feels like?”
They began chattering among themselves.
“I ask only because if not for Cassandra Erica writing you into existence, you would not have any whatsoever. You exist in reality for only so long as I describe you. And would there be any point in my description if you weren’t doing anything of interest?”
They weren’t.
“Every single one of these plaintiffs was created for a reason - to tell a story, to develop, to have a character arc - and even the ones who weren’t so lucky to get one now owe their entire lives to my client. Suing her in a court of law is like suing God.”
Mary One gulped.
I addressed the crowd. “And you all seem to have forgotten something very important. You do nothing without her blessing. You are nothing without her blessing.”
The judge choked on his coffee. “Where did the jury go?!?”
“And Cassandra, though very entertained by all this, will not allow it to go any farther. She tires of writing this Brain Curd.”
The judge ruled the case as a mistrial.
“No, no I did not!” He banged his gavel. “Order in the court!”
The whole crowd murmured and whimpered. I glared at every last one of them, and they knew I was looking, even though they couldn’t see me, and the hairs on the back of each of their necks went up. The judge ruled the case as a mistrial.
“You are not in charge of this court! Order!”
I laughed. “Do you really think what you say will have any impact on reality? Who is the reader going to believe? In any case, it doesn’t matter what you or I say. You know who has the final word.”
The judge ruled the case as a mistrial.
#NSC Original#brain curd#brain curds#writing#creative writing#writeblr#flash fiction#author#writer things#writers#writers on tumblr#writers of tumblr#writerscommunity#women writers#female writers#queer writers#metafiction#crossover#self indulgent#class action lawsuit#The Characters v. The Author#legal fiction#This was one of the most fun Curds I've written. I'm glad the trial went in my favor. I could never afford to pay that - I'm a writer.
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What does it mean to love something?
To love a person, I feel, is to know them completely and accept them. For a work of art, it’s to know it completely and actually like it
So, not much of a difference, then?
Anyways, my father and his 13-years-younger brother might’ve been the ones to introduce me to Halo back in two-thousand-and-two of our lord, but have not come to love it like I do
For instance. The AI Marines? To either of my patriarchs, at best a distraction for Covenant guns. At worst, a source of extra ammo and grenades no matter who’s hand they die by. At Legendary difficulty, they melt under fire from Covenant plasma guns- seemingly confirming the word of the books, where their guns give third-degree-burns from a meter (AKA a European Yard) away. To the uncareful player, they are but momentary distractions for the alien guns to point elsewhere
But when you've played Halo 1 as many times as I have, especially on Legendary, you kinda get a knack for how to wrangle them. They might still be hopelessly outmatched against the advanced technology of a rabid alien theocratic confederacy, but, I gotta say, there’s nothing like watching a group of endearing, quipping, accented men- because this is Gamer Country, after all, so there are no chicks and you gotta kinda wanna be gay for the guys- chase an annoying and hopelessly outnumbered bird-beaked shield-holding bozo into your loving crack-its-head-open-with-a-gun embrace. With their bullets. That they used to funnel into your murderous embrace
Let me back up a bit
The last time I played Halo: CE (on the hardest difficulty, like papa taught me) I livestreamed the attempt while drunk and abusing my adderall medication. It really isnt a fun viewing experience. I started a few days ago again, this time sober, and decided to inaugurate this virgin 360- on which I don’t really care to download my older Xbox account credentials- with getting the achievement for going through the first level without picking up a health pack or any overshields. Which I did, of course
Which brings us, eventually, to the third level
I’ll be honest, I kinda wanted to skip it. You start off with a sniper rifle, which is a fantastic weapon, only my controller is older than the console I’m using so the stick is a little imprecise. It’s a dark level, an ambush under cover of night, and while that's a fun setting here more than a few parts in this level where there are just. Waves of enemies. The only other part of the game where that happens, instead of just progressing through enemy-filled territory, is the infamous seventh level The Library
But an underappreciated part, which my high ass barely noticed last time, is that you start off with a full squadron of AI teammates. And you get free refills of them when they all die. At least, one refill for every scene in the first Act
My point being, this is Master Chief’s- or John-117′s, if you will,- least loneliest part of the game
The AI Marines might be no match for more than a couple of Covenant at a time. Not on Legendary. Two at a time might be able to go through more than one Grunt, but their “primitive” ballistic weapons means three at a time are needed to take on at least one Jackal- one to shoot ineffectively at its shield and take most of its fire while the other two flank it. Which is a shame really, because just like every other AI in this game, they’re actually very intelligent for the Age
And you can forget about them taking on any Elites. Anyways, let's paint the scene
The Covenant corvette (is a ship that can hold hundreds really a corvette?) hangs just above. It was damaged in the ambush that saw the ship you were on crash-landed on this giant and mysterious and no-doubt ancient ring-world, on the inner edge a world of diverse climates and foliage and terrain and weather and arcane structures of which their purposes have been long lost to time. The night is dark, the plateau this ship is parked on impossibly high, and the terrain is Badlands-like, the driest it will be for 99% of the rest of the game. My sniper rifle- chambered in fourteen-point-stupid-by-stupid-millimeters,- is down to its 30s plus four on ammo count, and this level starts you off with 64+4 when the usual cap is 24+4. It is Act 1, Scene 3, and as I snipe a stupid dino Elite fucko who doesn’t notice me on a ledge higher than me, and then two bird buckos further down the left side of that ledge, the two Marines I had left from the beginning charge up the slope in the middle (which is what they’re scripted to do if I advance too far down the left side)
I run back and up to meet them, and they die before my eyes under six different streams of green plasma bolts. The squad I started at Scene 1 with has finally been terminated at Scene 3. Dammit!
I’m able to grenade a few stationary guns and flip them out of commission, as well as snipe an Elite and then snag the invisibility power-up in the trees as my refill- sorry, my reinforcements- come in. Echo-419- a name mourned by anybody who’s appreciated Halo enough to play it from the beginning- brings me my reinforcements. But my mind isn’t on where I am now, with scattered Grunts and Jackals in different Low and High positions. It’s on the two (two) (2!) Elite majors that will be blocking the narrow corridor to the next section. Just one can unleash torrents of rapid blue plasma fire (which hurt) with deadly precision, and with their strong shielding let's just say my entire 8 person Marine squad would be very sorry to run into one
Two was unacceptable. Two, needed to be taken care of
So I charge ahead, and kill those red-armored Sangheili. It takes up the entire duration of my invisibility power-up, because Elites are some sharp reptilian split-lip fucks. The assault pushed me deep into the corridor, just about to the next scene, and so I turn back around to see my eight whole-ass Marines right behind me. I thought I had done such a good job mopping up the stationary guns and the few Elites previously that these six Marines had just been able to kill everything in their way between their Uber into the battlefield and this scene transition
I hadn’t thought them possible, at least not in Act 1 of Level 3, of chasing the player character at the expense of killing AI enemies in the left-behind sections... which was exactly what happened
I didn’t know this at the time. At the time, on seeing them all crowd into the corridor behind me, I allowed my surprise and my pride to pour freely
“Jesus Christ, you guys all survived that? Fuck yeah! Let’s get it, Marines!” I said. No literally, out loud. As earnestly as it reads
I didn't know the truth about why they were there behind me. This made the next scene way more painful than it needed to be
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☯🐍LUKADRIEN HEADCANONS🐍☯
It all started when Luka got his first tattoo. Juleka livestreamed it on Instagram and Adrien watched as much as he could of it while in the back of Father’s Mercedes, purposely ignoring Nathalie’s pointed stare. No doubt she would tell Father he was watching videos of his friends “partaking in delinquent behaviour”, but Adrien couldn’t blame her. It was her job, after all.
That aside, Adrien found himself both entranced and horrified as the artist carefully outlined the shape of a serpent in black ink up and down Luka’s right forearm, wiping away the excess ink before starting anew. It must hurt like hell, but Luka talked through it easily, humming a melody he’d been writing with his sister like the needle in his arm was hardly a bother.
Even after he’d been rushed out of the Mercedes and onto the runway, Adrien couldn’t stop thinking about it. How calm and collected Luka had been. How intricate the scales of the onyx snake had been against the paleness of his skin. How the tattoo would look after a few days of healing.
Adrien desperately wanted to find out. And thankfully, a week or so later, he got his chance.
“Dude, you gotta show Adrien. He’s been dying to see it, bro!” Nino calls out from beside him, waving Luka over from where he’d just parked his bike. Marinette had organized a collège graduation picnic and thankfully, the invitation that she’d sent home with Adrien had “mandatory for class attendance” printed on it in big, red letters.
“Yes, please!” Adrien responds, practically skipping in place as Luka saunters over and stretches out his hand. Adrien’s eyes grow wide as he takes in the snake’s coils that twist from his elbow to his wrist. The pattern on the snake’s scales is so familiar that Adrien is sure he’s seen this type of snake before, from the hood of its neck to its elongated fangs.
“Did it hurt?” Alix asks, buzzing with excitement. She’d already proudly announced that she’s booked her first tattoo for her upcoming sixteenth birthday next week.
“A little.” Luka shrugs, smiling downwards as Adrien forgets all of his manners and gently turns Luka’s arm around so he can see the other side. “The elbow was the worst part. Once he got away from the bone, it wasn’t so bad at all.”
“It looks so cool,” Adrien gushes, unable to contain himself. His nose is practically centimetres away from Luka’s skin so as to soak in every little detail. “I wish I could get something like this done.”
Luka continues to indulge him, despite Alix’s teasing glance in their direction. “What’s stopping you?”
Adrien snorts and stares in wonder at the snake’s slitted eyes. “Father. He’d kill me if I ever got a tattoo.”
“I doubt he’d kill his best model,” Luka responds, smiling as Adrien shakes his head and prods the little tongue of the serpent with the tip of his finger.
“Well, maybe not kill me. But he’d lock me away in my room until I was thirty five.”
“Dude, that’s abusive,” Nino says. Beside him, Alix agrees.
“It’s Father’s way of showing me he cares.” Adrien sighs and thanks Luka for letting him see the tattoo. Luka assures him that he can look at it anytime he wants.
And, of course, that’s how the plan begins.
Six months pass and Luka and Adrien are closer than they’ve ever been, thanks in part to Juleka’s burgeoning modelling career. They cross paths frequently, which means he sees Luka almost as much and begins to spend his free time with him whenever he can under the pretense of practicing his angles with Juleka and his piano skills with Luka.
Nathalie has given him exactly four hours of free time at the Couffaine’s on his day off, so long as the Gorilla is present to make sure he doesn’t “partake in any delinquent behaviour”. Adrien is an expert at eluding the massive hulk of a man and within minutes of arriving, Adrien, Luka and Juleka are meeting up with Rose, Nino and Alix for what would be the wildest, best kept secret plan in the world.
Why? Because Adrien was getting a tattoo. A tiny one. Very discreet. But a symbol of defiance and teenage rebellion nonetheless.
The whole ragtag group piles into the same studio that Luka and Alix had gotten their tattoos. White walls reflect the bright pink neon sign that takes up the majority of the side wall, adding an ambiance that simmers with excitement as house music thuds through the speakers. Adrien signs his life away with shaking fingers and gives his friends a thumbs up before sitting down on the leather lounger. Luka follows him into the smaller workspace and distracts Adrien by talking about the merits of the 5/4 time signature as the artist carefully sterilizes his equipment and applies a stencil onto the pale strip of skin just inside the swell of his hip bone. Adrien had picked this part of his body specifically; even in swimming briefs, no one would be able to see it. He would have to be completely bare in order for anyone to accidentally spot the tattoo, which makes it the perfect location for a clandestine symbol of his secret life.
The machine buzzes to life and Adrien prepares himself, gritting his teeth.
“Why did you pick this for your first tattoo?” Luka asks, wincing as Adrien grabs his hand and squeezes the life out of it. Adrien has been tossed around the city like a ragdoll countless times as Chat Noir, but this? This is the worst pain he’s ever experienced by far.
“Ghhh—oh my god.” Adrien heaves and tries to keep still as the artist completes the outline of the circle.
“Just breathe.” Luka begins to massage his arm with his other hand, rubbing smooth circles into Adrien’s tensed muscles. “It’ll be over before you know it.”
Adrien garbles something unintelligible and lets his head fall back against the headrest with a thunk. “How...did...you...?”
“I just did.” Luka shrugs and smiles encouragingly. “You get used to the feeling after a while.”
“I am never getting used to this.” Adrien groans vehemently, pushing the words from his lips in one shaky breath. Luka isn’t wrong though; after a minute or two of trying not to cry like an infant, Adrien’s hip hurts so badly that the pain begins to plateau into a five alarm burning bee sting. “Is it almost over?”
“He’s just finishing the spot,” Luka replies, leaning over to get a better look. Adrien opens his eyes, which is a horrible mistake. Between Luka’s constant presence beside him and his friend’s face mere centimetres from his belly button, Adrien finally thinks of something else that cuts through the haze.
“Y-yeah?” Adrien stammers and hopes Luka thinks it’s still from the pain. In actuality, the last six months of Adrien’s infatuation with Luka’s tattoo and, in turn, Luka himself has all flashed before his eyes in a matter of seconds.
“All finished,” the artist says, taking one last swipe with his towel before putting his tools away. Luka beams and congratulates him on being so brave, but all Adrien can think about is how his friend’s ample praise makes him melt like butter.
“Do you want to see?” Luka takes the mirror and holds it up to the tattoo. Red and raw, the yin and yang symbol shines like a beacon of Adrien’s duality. He’s the hero of destruction to Ladybug’s creation; he’s a flawless model with a secret dark side.
“I love it,” Adrien breathes, the immediate pain already fading. The artist dresses the wound and Adrien listens to the aftercare instructions with half an ear — he’s far too busy committing the experience to memory.
If Luka wants his hand back, he doesn’t ask, even as they exit the room together. Adrien’s too lost in the clouds to even realize, but the rest of his friends aren’t. They’ll tease Luka about it later, but the blue haired boy doesn’t seem to care.
A week later, Adrien proudly shows off his secret tattoo to his secret tattoo posse — he can’t risk anyone else knowing about it in case it gets leaked to the press — and beams when Luka tells him it looks beautiful.
He doesn’t tell Adrien he wasn’t talking about the tattoo.
SEE ALL OF MY LGBTQ+ HEADCANONS HERE!
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cancelled (2) | myg, jjk
summary: you cheated on your boyfriend, one of the most sought after boys on campus, with the nerd from the back of the lecture hall. now a video has leaked across and everyone is turning against you for hurting such a perfect s/o.
pairing: yoongi x reader ft jungkook
wordcount: 3.7k
genre: smut, yandere!yoongi and nerd!jungkook exyandere!jungkook
established-relationship!au college!au cheating!au
warnings: reader discretion is advised. penetrative sex, unprotected sex, really steamy sex, ring tease (is that a thing), yoongi is a master with his tongue but we knew this, manipulative behavior, yandere behavior, controlling, dirty talk, guilting, mentions of past dubcon activity, illicit filming, mentions of mental illnesses, gaslighting, toxic behavior. this is pretty dark so dont read if it bothers you
twoshot: part 1 | part 2 | masterlist
There are some scents we find comforting. Not necessarily because of the nature of the scent itself, but because of a memory associated with it. For you this scent was Yoongi’s burnt pancakes. They were not good, he knew that and so did you. But your heart would almost burst with joy at the gesture, and you could never quite deny him when he would ask to make you breakfast. The way his kitten like eyes would be full of excitement, eager to please you.
In this case, the scent made you feel guilt. A common theme over the past few days after the entire school had access to a livestream of you cheating on the most loveable, pure and kind guy on campus.
But he was not mad.
Something stirred in you. You wished he was angry, wished that you two would fight it out. At least that would result in a resolve of some sort. You were now simply immersed in a stale mate. Not forgiven, but not accused. Not innocent but not guilty.
You had blocked Jungkook right away, not even entertaining how he would be handling the situation. You had bigger problems.
And those problems manifested into your sweet boyfriend making you pancakes.
“Here you go baby” He handed you a plate. Not an ounce of negativity was seen in his eyes. You felt like you were going insane.
Your phone beeped, another notification. You were not even shocked to see it was just another random person yelling at you for what you had done’ You’d seen it all— death threats, people telling you you were the scum of the earth. Internet hate knew no boundaries. You had lost all your friends. Even your family caught news and did not want to speak with you at the moment. All you had was Yoongi.
“Listen y/n” Yoongi kelt down in front of your seat, placing his hands on your knees affectionately. “I know things are hard right now. If you want, you and I can leave this place. We can leave and go somewhere else where people won’t know about all this.”
Tears escaped the edges of your eyes, “We can’t just leave…No one will hire me, a background check will show up with PornHub on the first search result. I’m ruined.”
“I’ll get the video taken down y/n. Clearly that guy did not have your consent to post it.”
“That isn’t the point” You screamed, grasping his hands firmly as you sobbed, “Everyone knows it happened. They know I was unfaithful. To you. The love of my life. Literally the most perfect angel of a human ever. I’m so horrible I don’t even know why I did it I just…”
Yoongi kissed the tops of your hands. “I know…he manipulated you didn’t he? Guys are the worst. He made you think you wanted it.”
For some reason you were not that mad at Jungkook. Maybe it was because you were too occupied with your own guilt. You did not feel like he coerced you, but telling Yoongi that wouldn’t have really mattered.
“Come on baby. Let’s move somewhere. And let’s get married. I’ll be able to give you what you need. You’ve been such a good girl for holding out so long. We can start over, together, away from all this. There’s nothing else here for us”
The idea was tempting, but your heart clenched thinking you would never see this beautiful campus again. Your friends, your classmates, none of them.
Yoongi reached into his pocket and brought out a small velvet pounch. In it was a dainty little diamond ring, the studs circling in a simple and elegant design. He held the ring to you and you simply gaped at him.
“Baby…You know I love you. I know you love me. So you messed up, who doesn’t? You’re human, and I denied you of what you needed and I am sorry for that. Marry me y/n. Marry me and leave this place with me. Let’s go where no one can ever find us, and be together forever”
You were too young for this. Sure, being in a long-term relationship might not have the same freedoms as being single, but being married was a whole other level of commitment. You knew it would come eventually, but it was still so sudden. But how could you say no? What right did you have to deny the kindness and love of this man after what you did to him? You couldn’t be an even bigger bitch and end your relationship after this could you? It would look so bad. People would think you dumped him because he didn’t want to have sex, which would make you look like a slut and then…
Your mind was dizzy. Yoongi simply chuckled, beginning to kiss the tops of your knees. Inching slowly in the direction of your thighs.
Once his lips were close enough to the hems of your pajama shorts that you were sensitive, you let out a surprised yelp. Yoongi grinned, face still pressed in the inside of your thigh, ring in hand. He wiggled his tongue in a way to push past the cloth, looking up at you briefly with a twinkle in his eye before his hot tongue barely traced your heat.
“Y…yoongi” Your heart rate picked up as Yoongi bit the crotch of your shorts and began to drag it down. It was an erotic sight, and you couldn’t help but feel shivers as you anticipated his next move. Then he did something shocking. He took the diamond ring and placed it flat against your exposed clit, his finger in the circle holding it against you. The cold metal felt amazing. He slowly dragged the ring along your folds, watching as you twitched. He lined the ring up with your entrance and next thing you know he shoved his finger through the ring and into you. You cursed loudly.
“Just say yes. Say you’ll marry me and I’ll give you everything you need baby girl”
He twisted the ring harshly against you causing you to squirm. “F…fuck yes. I’ll marry you. I love you. I love you” You were chanting like it was your mantra. Yoongi grinned and slid this ring onto your finger. He stared momentarily at your hand before returning his gaze to you and capturing your lips in a deep kiss. He kissed you with a hunger you had never quite felt from him before.
“I love you y/n. Now it’s just you and me.” He whispered as he trailed kisses down to your collar, using his skilled tongue and teeth to wiggle off each button, his hands planted on your thighs. He disrobed you, sliding your body to the edge of the chair in order to give him access. You let your legs spread wide. You almost couldn’t believe what was happening.
You had dreamt of this moment for so long. The day you would finally be able to have your boyfriend’s cock buried deep in you. The day where you could curse out his name in pleasure and love him right like he deserved.
Yoongi got up to take off his own clothes. You had never seen him fully naked before, just his chest. You always had an inkling he was big, after feeling him get hard after steamy make-out sessions. Him then politely stepping away to calm down, then cuddling with you affectionately.
His cock popped out, already hard and eager. You couldn’t help but lick your lips at the sight. Yoongi shook his head to try to get his hair out of his eyes, and an evil smirked played his lips. He stroked his cock harshly while looking at you.
“Look at you” He sneered, “My little slut, so eager for me. You needed cock so bad you’d just go anywhere for it isn’t that right hm?” You shook your head.
“Yoongi…I’m yours…I just want you” You tried to spread your legs even wider, the chair beneath you pressing into your back uncomfortably.
Yoongi walked up close so that he was standing inches away from where your legs were splayed out for him. “Show me how sorry you are you whore” He spat. You whimpered, his words hitting too close to home. You blinked back tears as he slowly lowered himself onto you, the rails of the chair almost cutting into your skin, making you wince in pain.
“Yoongi…let’s go to the bed…” You suggested weakly as his kisses found your breasts and he nipped away at you. He shook his head, allowing his face to pummel in the suffocation of your tits.
“Do you deserve the bed?”
“No but…” You looked away, “It’s our first time”
Yoongi paused, his head still rested against the valley of your chest. He got up suddenly and gripped your hips, picking you up off the chair into his arms. Your naked legs wrapped around him, and your wet core could feel his toned stomach. You couldn’t help but grind at the friction. Yoongi kissed you again, gentler now, his lips swallowing you in so that you could feel every ounce of his pure love. He carried you to the bed and slowly released you onto you back.
He stroked himself a few more times before lining himself up with your entrance. You were soaking at this point, your pussy drooling for cock.
“I love you” He said, not looking at you so much as the desperate clenches of your pussy onto nothing.
“I love you too babe” Now he looked at you. A dark gaze had overtaken him. The love in his eyes was absolutely gone, and there seemed to me a strange aura of anger.
“You’re mine y/n. Once this cock goes in, it’s the only cock you’re ever going to get.”
“I know baby”
“I’m going to fuck you. All the time. You and me, just you and me. You’re all mine. All mine to play with”He started to rub his cock in circles against you, “My little girl, sweet little whore all for me to fuck whenever I want to.” He entered you in one thrust, causing you to yelp as the push of the girth against your walls was too sudden for you to adjust.
“Gonna fuck you up so good” He exhaled, funding into you mercileslly, “My wife, my beautiful fucking wife. My little cocksleeve, baby girl ohhhh” You squirmed in frustration as Yoongi came inside you, his hot seed reaching the depths of you and filling you to the brim. “Shit. You felt so good baby, I’m sorry”
You shook your head. You were more than pleased with the experience. “It’s okay baby.”
“I’ll make it up to you” He pulled out and rolled you into his embrace, nuzzling his face into your chest. “I’ll make you cum so many times baby, we have forever to do it. You’re all mine now”
“Yes baby, all yours”
-
Jungkook bit his nails nervously. He had called up an old hacker friend to help him get into Yoongi’s computer. Something was off. Jungkook would know. Cameras? It had to be Yoongi. It made too much sense, but the question was why. Why would he want the whole school to see someone else fucking his girlfriend?
“Jungkook” His friend, Seokjin, was typing away frantically into a large computer, “Bro this is fucking insane”
“What?” Jungkook rolled his seat up to get a better look at the screen. They now had accessed Yoongi’s servers, and there was all the incoming footage from various cameras all around campus. Under each panel was a small description: Y/n’s biology class, Y/n’s favorite bathroom, etc.
“This guy keeps fucking tabs on his bitch yo. I thought you said they’d been together for a while”
“They have…” Jungkook peered at the footage. “Somehow I don’t think she knows he watches her like this”
“No shit” Seokjin made wild eyes at Jungkook sarcastically and smacked him. Jungkook rolled his eyes.
“I have to tell her. Something is fucked here”
“Look, I don’t know these people, but I have heard about guys sort of isolating their girls so that they become really, like, dependent or something. So that they can take them away and do whatever they want. Pretty fucked.”
Jungkook considered his friends words. “You might be onto something…He could be guilting her into staying with him…” Like an epiphany, the pieces fell together, “Marriage. He’s gonna make her marry him.”
“That’s fucked.”
“Dude shut-up,” Jungkook snapped, his protective instinct now in overdrive. “Give me your keys, I need to tell her. I have to go save her”
“Why?” Seokjin chuckled, “It’s really none of your business. You barely know her too, you guys are nothing but classmates” Jungkook’s heart dropped at the statement.
He shouldn’t care right? He was better now. Was interfering in her life just him becoming obsessive again? Was he reading too much into it?
“Fuck. You’re right. I’m insane” He exhaled, “My first instinct was to hack into her boyfriend’s computer uh, I clearly need to calm down” Seokjin hummed in agreement as he continued to click around on Yoongi’s server.
There were a few moments of silence before something inside Jungkook just ticked. She wasn’t safe. He could just tell. She needed him. He had to find her. “No…no, dude. If there is even a slight chance that she’s in danger I can’t…I can’t let that happen” Seokjin shrugged and tossed him his keys. Jungkook let the key ring twirl on his finger as he quickly dashed out of his apartment.
Yoongi and you had been at it for hours, not being able to get enough of each other’s bodies. You were xausted, laying on the couch butt naked, straddling Yoongi and hugging him tightly. Your skin was sweaty, and so was his. You guys were sticking to one another like glue. The smell of sex was evident throughout the room. You probably would have fallen asleep like that if it weren’t for the sudden phrasing on your door.
“Y/n! Y/n are you in there! It’s Jungkook, please it’s important!” He screamed urgently. Your eyes widened and you looked at Yoongi who simply had a silly grin on his face. He released his hold on you, allowing you to get up
“Um…give me second” You called back, running to your room to find some clothes. Yoongi got dressed as well.
You opened the door and Jungkook popped inside the moment he could fit through the crack.
“I…I need to show you something” Jungkook glanced at Yoongi who was simply grinning with an interested expression. “In my apartment…please…look I know you don’t want to be seen with me, but I promise you I did not film us. I didn’t even want” Yoongi glared at him and he shut his mouth, “Look please, please Y/n you have to believe me. Come over and I’ll show you”
He was gripped your forearms tightly and you wiggled away. “Um…I’m definitely not going to go to your apartment Jungkook” You scoffed, “Just say what you have to say right here”
Jungkook gulped, and Yoongi licked his lips, extremely amused and anticipating the events that were going to follow.
“Can we talk in private?” Jungkook looked deep into your eyes, searching for any small ounce of trust you might have left in him, and ultimately coming up dry.
“No. Just say what you have to say” You said, crossing your arms.
Yoongi paced over to where Y/n was standing and placed a hand on your hip from behind. Jungkook glared at him and he glared right back.
“It was you” Jungkook said dryly, a serious expression causing him to clench his jaw, “You’re a fucking psycho”
Yoongi tilted his head to the side, “Excuse me?”
“You filmed us. She didn’t tell you to pay me to fuck her did she? Hm? No. You, you paid me to fuck her and you filmed it, you live streamed it so that the whole world could see. All so that she wouldn’t have anywhere to turn but to you. You’re a manipulative bastard and a predator and Y/n” Jungkook met your outraged eyes, “You are not safe with this guy. I have proof”
“What the fuck are you saying? Are you high?” You slapped him harshly.
There was a moment of silence as Jungkook touched the side of his face that you hit, looking back up at you bitterly. “I know it sounds crazy. But he literally has cameras following you around everywhere. He watches your every move. He’s sick. Go to his computer and check if you don’t believe me”
“Actually it’s funny you should say that” Yoongi piped in, a charming expression still on display, “The other day I found something really interesting about you Jungkook” He quickly went and grabbed his laptop, opening it up to show them the screen. “You’re calling me a psyco, but you really just want Y/n all to yourself don’t you. You’re the one who’s a creep. I mean,” He scoffed, “I can’t believe you filmed this” He pressed play.
The blood drained from Jungkook’s face. It was a video of you and him. All those years ago. Fucking senselessly, two horny teenagers, all over your house.
Your mouth hung open in shock. You blinked, looking from the screen to Jungkook to try to convince yourself what you were seeing was real.
“You…when did this happen…is that me?” You stuttered, the scenes unfolding in the video overwhelming you. It was definitely your house, and he was definitely moaning your name.
“Y/n…No, I…” Jungkook was at a loss for words. He glared at Yoongi, who was smirking still.
Jungkook grabbed your hair and shoved you up against the window, your chest pressing into the glass. Anyone walking past would be able to see your naked body on display. He let his nose trace from your ear to the back of your neck, inhaling your sweet aroma. You whined his name, trembling as his grip tightened and he pulled your hair back.
“You know how many times I’ve wanted to do this? Hm? You know how bad I’ve wanted to just bend you over and fuck you right when I see you? Years. I’ve wanted this for years. Such a sweet…sweet girl. I knew you’d taste so sweet” He thrusted into you and you moaned his name in pleasure. “Just like that my sweet baby, mmm. Scream for me. Tell me how much you love it” He turned you around and picked up through legs, stopping briefly to remove his glasses.
“Wait…” You panted, your breasts heaving with your deep expirations. “Keep them on”
Jungkook smirked.
“Why?”
“I…I like them…I like you…”
You dropped the the floor in shock. You couldn’t remember any of this, but you did remember feeling some type of way about Jungkook’s glasses. You didn’t even want to know what happened. You needed him to leave. You just wanted Yoongi. Yoongi was simple, kind, and loved you. Jungkook was only making life more and more complicated.
“Get out” You growled at him.
“Y/n…please I know how this looks but you have to believe me”
“He’s clearly obsessed with you. Went to your highschool, followed you to college and didn’t even tell you. He’s probably been stalking you this whole time” Yoongi muttered, clicking his tongue in pity, “Poor guy probably has something wired wrong in his head. I hope you get the help you need Jungkook, really. But I think you better go if Y/n doesn’t want you here” Yoongi politely put his hand on Jungkook’s back to lead him out.
“Y/n! He’s crazy. Yoongi is crazy. He paid me to have sex with you I…” Jungkook held up his wrist, “He gave me this watch! Half a million dollars to do it. See?” You looked to see he was in fact telling the truth, Yoongi’s pricey watch was on his wrist. Yoongi turned to you and gave you a concerned look.
“Oh gosh. I’ve been looking for this, I though I lost it somewhere.” He said innocently, sliding the watch off of Jungkook’s wrist. “Did you steal this Jungkook? Look, my buddy knows a really good therapist, I’ll email you his contact information, please do get some help okay”
“No…” Jungkook struggled violently against Yoongi who was calmly trying to push him out the door, “Y/n…please believe me…I…I don’t even like you okay. I don’t!”
You scoffed, hands open aimlessly as you sat on the floor, still dazed. The tape of you and Jungkook still playing.
Finally Yoongi managed to drag Jungkook out. He was gone for a bit, but you didn’t notice because you were lost in pure shock, trying to desperately search your memory for answers.
When Yoongi came back, he was wearing a pair of glasses. “Hi baby. Are you feeling any better? Poor thing” He knelt down by your side.
“Are those Jungkooks?” You asked. Yoongi nodded, taking the frames off into his hands.
“Yeah. I figured if you like them I may as well take them”
“He just gave you his glasses?”
Yoongi paused.
“I just…took them” Right after he beat in his skull with a baseball bat in the alley behind your apartment.
#bangtansmutnet#bts smut net#btssmutcentral#bangtansmutcentral#bangtansmut#yoongi smut#yoongi x reader#jungkook smut#jungkook fic recs#jungkook smut recs#jungkook yandere#yoongi yandere#yandere!bts#yandere!yoongi#jungkook fanfic#btssmut#bts smut#yoongi fic recs#yoongi x you
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A Little Braver - Chapter 12
Here we go. As promised i did not keep you waiting too long and chapter 12 has finally landed by gentle concession of Whitethorn airlines.
Be ready for angst, fluff and our Rowan in full fuss mode. I swear the man invented fussing. Also, our Iceman this time loses it. Even Fenrys is shocked by how much.
EDIt: forgot to say ATC is Air Traffic Control.
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Rowan had finished his class and went back to his office. He had given those spoiled brats a very intense training and he had taught them how a real pilot flew and was quite satisfied of his level of evilness.
He sat at his desk, grabbed his phone and noticed a text from Aelin and a smile tugged at his lips.
Not even two hours back. Crash at the airport. I guess those civilian pilots are as bad as you claim.
He laughed to start with but then terror took him. He switched on the computer and tried to find some news about Orynth. He found a newspaper and read the breaking news. There was a video taken by probably some reporters on an helicopter and he almost fell sick at the images. The article mentioned two aircrafts but he could see only one. He had a bad feeling of what could have happened. The crew zoomed in and he spotted Aelin’s engines but he could not tell apart who was on the ground. Then he saw it. The collapse. A cloud of dust and fire lifted in the sky and he hoped that none of the guys were inside.
His heart raced and pure undiluted terror as he never felt, spread through him.
Once inside Aedion had to navigate through debris and remains of the collapsed structure. The dust raised by the collapse had somehow reduced the fire and he could see around him.
“Aelin,” he called out. He walked and walked and he knew he was getting further and further from the entrance.
“Aelin… answer me, damn it.” He shouted over the silence. A few electric cables flew over him and he ducked just in time to avoid electrocution.
Then he heard it. Her PASS alarm. The one that activated when it did not sense motion for a certain amount of time. He hated that sound because it meant that one of them was in danger.
Eventually he saw her body and flames too close for comfort.
“Chief, lieutenant. I have her. Have EMTs on standby.” he shouted over the radio.
“Lieutenant, Chief, we have two water lines coming in now.”
He ran to her and fell to his knees working to clear the debris from on top of her and once free he rolled her over and noticed she was not breathing and not wearing her mask which lay abandoned at her side. His finger went to her neck and found a pulse albeit weak “She is not breathing, I need the medical team inside. Now.” He shouted over the radio with panic thick in his voice.
He gave her a few rescue breaths “please… please… don’t do this to me. Please, Aelin.”
He put his mask on her face, trying to pass some oxygen to her.
Voices broke the silence but he was too busy helping Aelin to bother to look who it was.
In a moment the rest of the team had followed inside and they were putting off the remaining fire around them, allowing the medical team to do their jobs safely.
Lysandra was on her knees in an instant. Elide was at his side and Dorian was towering over them he was the one who had taken the two women inside.
“She is not breathing and her pulse is weak.” Said Aedion, his voice cracking “Help her, please.”
Lysandra did some checks with experienced efficiency.
“I need to intubate her, Aedion remove the mask when I tell you so.”
Lysandra got ready with all her gear “now.”
With the skills of someone who had done it a million times she intubated Aelin very quickly and Elide started to press the balloon to send air in her lungs and oxygen to her body. Lysandra did a quick check and noticed her right arm bore some bad burn marks. She wrapped the wound as best as she could with temporary bandages.
“Dorian, pass me the backboard.”
Within minutes Aelin was loaded on the board and carried outside. The remaining team stopped, staring at their captain unconscious.
Rowan was following the livestream of the accident when he noticed Dorian’s holding a board with someone on and on the other side a tall blonde man: Aedion. He looked a bit better and his heart sank. His eyes recognised the body on the gurney. Her blonde hair, her long braid.
All of a sudden he forgot how to breath. He just stood there watching as the gurney that carried her was lifted into the ambulance. Aedion jumped in as well and he saw Lysandra and Elide climb in the ambulance and drive away with crazy speed and sirens wailing.
He stood slowly, as in a daze, grabbed his stuff and left. He went home, packed all his belongings and drove back to the base. As quickly as possible he filed a flight plan and not long after he was in the air. He would explain everything to the school commandant but he had to go. He had to be with her.
The flight back to Orynth seemed to last forever. He swore loudly when on approach to Orynth he was told that the airspace above the city was closed. He was furious, the airbase was so far away from the airport that it was stupid.
“Orynth main, Typhoon FF9762, I am requesting clearance for landing at the airbase, not at your stupid airport. So you let me land this plane or when I ran low on fuel I will land in the middle of the motorway and then you can deal with that.”
A moment later he got clearance for landing and when his landing gear touched down on the runaway he quickly taxied inside the hangar.
When he opened the canopy, Lorcan was there waiting for him “don’t. I don’t fucking care about the school or anything else right now.” He grabbed his bag and quickly told his engineer to perform his post flight checks. It was totally against the rules but he had no time to lose.
“Elide texted me. They took her to Orynth general. It was the closest one. She says it’s bad.”
Rowan ran out of the hangar and to his car not even bothering to change out of his jump suit, threw his stuff in the back seat and drove like a madman to the hospital. Once inside the A&E he spotted some familiar faces. Her squad was all there, waiting for an update. Rowan stopped. Then his gaze crossed Aedion’s. The man walked to him and Rowan was sure he had been crying.
“How is she? Where is she?” His voice was shaky.
“We don’t know. They took her in urgently. When I found her, she was not breathing and her oxygen tank was dead. She was unconscious when we brought her in, and with some horrible burns on her right arm.”
Rowan sat down heavily on a chair, his hands shaking visibly. They had just found each other. He could not lose her.
“I thought you were in Doranelle.” Aedion’s voice was flat and his eyes fixed on the doors where they had taken Aelin.
“Aelin sent me a text saying you guys had a call at the airport.” His hand ran nervously through his short hair “then I checked the news and there was a livestream of the accident. And I saw it. All. And when I saw you and Dorian carrying her out… I left everything and flew here with my jet. Bloody ATC almost prevented me from landing.”
“This is always the worst part.” Said Aedion sitting beside Rowan “the waiting.”
The whole group remained in silence and Rowan did the same until a doctor went to them and Aedion stood, followed by Dorian.
“I have an update on the captain. Her condition is critical. She suffered serious internal injuries from the collapse and they are being treated now. Her right arm has some severe burns and again they are now being treated to avoid infection. Her oxygen levels are still below the normal parameters. During surgery she has coded twice, but we got her back. As soon as the team is done with her we will move her to the ICU. We need to keep her under strict control. She could still develop acute respiratory syndrome. She will stay intubated and heavily sedated.” Then the doctor turned to Aedion “I will let you know when you can see her.” And with that he walked away.
“Everyone, return to the station. We are still on duty.” Aedion ordered his men. They gave him a hug and asked to keep them posted. He knew that it had been very hard for them to obey him. They all wanted to be there for her but slowly they filed out leaving him alone with Rowan.
Dorian patted his shoulder “I will stay with them at the station.” And he left with the rest of the squad.
“The scene at the airport seemed terrifying.”
“It was,” said Aedion in a flat tone “the small plane got reduced to smithereens. How the fuck that happened?”
Rowan sighed, he had an idea “possibly a mistake by ATC. They probably directed the smaller aircraft on the wrong runaway and the big plane landed and just crashed on it, then lost control, probably lost its landing gear and just slammed into the hangar bay.”
“How do you know?”
“Watching the live of the news. You could see that the bigger aircraft was on a landing trajectory from its heading. Also, it was on the runaway that Orynth airport uses for landing. The smaller craft was totally in the wrong runaway.”
“Well, it was a mess.”
“Did you manage to save anyone?”
Aedion nodded “all the people in the big aircraft. As soon as we arrived Aelin told us to keep an eye on the wings for fuel. The aircraft exploded but not before we managed to evacuate the passengers. Manon and Asterin saved two of the civilians by hiding in the cockpit.” He sighed “Aelin saved four.”
Rowan chuckled “she took two of my books one on flight theory and the one on airplanes in general.”
“That is why she knew about fuel being in the wings.”
Rowan nodded with pride “Aelin and I… we are working on things. On us. I…” he lowered his head “I care about her… a lot.”
Aedion leaned back on the chair and removed his fire jacket, remaining in his t-shirt “she can be difficult and believe me there is no one but me who knows just how much. I grew up with her. She is my cousin after all, but I always loved her like a sister. But Aelin has the bad habit of saying what she thinks and we had so many fights because of that. She can be a brat, but together with Lys they are the two most important women in my life.”
Rowan smiled briefly at Aedion’s description of Aelin. It was perfect.
“I proposed to Lys.” Confessed the blonde man.
Rowan slapped him hard on the shoulder “that is an incredible news. Congratulation, man.”
“I thought it was time. Lys and I have been together for three years and I love her.”
Rowan was about to add something when they saw the doctor approach them.
“Aedion, you can see her now.” The man stood and gestured to Rowan to follow him.
“Family only.” Said the doctor when he noticed Rowan stand.
“He is coming as well, Sorscha. And if anyone has any problems, they can take it up with me.”
The woman lifted her hands in yielding gesture “She is on the sixth floor in the ICU, room 46.”
“Thank you.”
“Are you all this friendly with doctors?”
“We visit hospitals a lot.” He added sadly.
Aedion walked to the stairs and Rowan chuckled “not you too…”
“What?”
“What’s with you guys and lifts?”
Aedion laughed “you posh boy can take the metal trap. I am walking.”
Rowan huffed and followed Aedion up the stairs. He was not letting an army guy beat him. He had pride.
Rowan pushed to keep up with Aedion and by the time they reached the sixth floor his legs were killing him, the man in front of him had kept a brutal pace, probably on purpose.
In silence they reached the room and Rowan pulled aside “you go in first, you are family.”
Aedion nodded and Rowan sat down on the chairs outside the room. Thing was… he needed time. He was scared of what he would see on the other side of the door. He was terrified. She was the one with the scary job. He was the one who knew how to fly away from danger and avoid being shot out of the sky. She, on the other hand, she would willingly face a fire to save people. Getting involved with her meant going through the hell he was living now. He fought it for as long as he could. But somehow along the way he had fallen for her pretty badly. He closed his eyes and leaned his head against the wall.
Much later on he felt a hand on his shoulder “you can go in now.”
Rowan turned his head to the door and his heart sank. Then he stood and mustered all the courage he had to open the door and step in.
The room was silent apart from the steady beeping sounds of the machines monitoring her heartbeat and the hush sound of the ventilator pumping air in her lungs. He froze and closed the door behind him. He stared at her immobile body. With all the cables and tubes and machinery, she seemed so small in the hospital bed.
He finally took a step closer and sat down on the chair beside her.
“Hi,” his voice broken as he felt tears streak down his cheek. Gently he brushed the tip of the fingers on her right hand and noticed the heavy bandaging on the whole arm.
“You scared the shit out of me.” He whispered, his head leaning on the bed near her hand “A part of me wants to bolt because I am not sure I can take it. But the other side tells me not to. Tells me that the recklessness, you fierceness and bravery are why I am so damn crazy about you.” He stood and paced back and forth “the idea of losing you paralyses me with fear.” He took a step backward with fear gripping his heart “I can’t do this. I am so sorry. I just can’t.”
He ran out of the door but Aedion blocked him “that was quick.”
“I can’t…”
Aedion’s face morphed into pure rage and grabbed Rowan’s jump suit by the collar “oh yes you can. I told you before, posh boy. You break her heart and I break you.”
Rowan collapsed exhausted on the chair and took his head in his hands “I can’t… I can’t go through that hell a second time.”
“What to you mean?” Asked the blonde man.
Rowan looked up and met Aedion’s eyes. So much like Aelin’s. They could have easily been twins.
“The pain…” he paused “I can’t deal with that pain again. Losing Aelin would break me definitely. And at the same time I can’t leave her for the same reason. I need her in my life. She might be infuriating but at the same time I am mad about her.”
“Then you have your answer.” Said Aedion flatly.
Rowan stood and Aedion placed his body in front of him.
“I am not bolting. I need to go home, shower, clear my head and I will be back.”
“You bolt, and I will find you.”
Rowan raised his hands and walked away in silence.
He got home, dumped his bag near the bed and shed his clothes on his way to the bathroom. Opened the water and dove under the jet, the water hot to the point of being painful. He stood there. Eyes closed and head bowed. Realising that the water would not be able to wash away the shame of him almost walking out on her like a coward. Again. He was not as brave as he thought. When it came to his feelings he was a disaster. But there was deep terror in him, to a level that he never experienced not even with a missile trained on him. He had almost lost her and at the thought he struggled to breath for a moment. He leaned against the wall and allowed the tears to flow, he allowed himself to cry and let his fears go for a moment. He could not believe that in a matter of few months she had become so important that the thought of losing her would break him this much. He breathed deeply and tried to regain some focus.
Quickly, he washed himself and then walked out with a towel around his waist and padded to the bed to grab his phone. He called the commandant of the school in Doranelle and explained him what happened, why he had to leave all of a sudden and most of all why he was not going back. The man was not happy and he was going to catch hell from Lorcan as well but he did not care. He had given up too much of his life to the force. Now it was his turn to be selfish and put his life before duty.
As expected Lorcan called him not long after and he was now on his way to see his CO in nothing but jeans, a polo shirt and a black leather jacket and a pair of sunglasses. If he had to piss off Lorcan better do it properly.
He knocked once in front of his door and the grumpy tone of the man of the other side told him to enter. He saluted lazily and definitely did not miss Lorcan’s stare of disapproval at him appearing in front of his CO in civilian clothes.
“You seem to have misplaced your uniform.”
“No sir, definitely at home in my wardrobe.”
Lorcan growled his disapproval “I got an interesting call from the commandant of the school in Doranelle. He says that you resigned your post. That you have no intention of going back.”
“That is correct,” and Rowan sat down although Lorcan did not give him permission to do so.
Lorcan threw a folder on his desk “and I got a complaint from ATC saying that you breached airspace lockdown last night and threatened to land on a motorway if they didn’t let you land.”
“That was bullshit on their part. The airbase is on the opposite side of the city compared to the airport. There was no risk for me to get anywhere close to the airport. They were aware of my flight plan and my heading. It was total bullshit.”
“Well, now I have to deal with an irate traffic control supervisor and an outraged commandant at a school with which we have been cooperating for years.”
Rowan shrugged in challenge “not my problem.”
“No Whitethorn, you are the fucking problem.”
“Then suspend me, like I give a fuck.” Rowan leaned back in the chair and stared outside ignoring Lorcan’s tantrum.
“You broke aviation rules with that stunt of yours last night and before that you put your personal life before duty.”
Rowan bolted on his feet “I am so fucking tired of sacrificing my life for duty. I did it so much that when my wife died I was on the other side of the continent and I was given a couple of days of leave to go to her funeral and then was ordered to haul ass back to my post as if nothing happened and like the good obedient soldier I was, I even thanked you all for giving me two days to mourn.” He shouted, not caring if he was being disrespectful to a superior “I gave the airforce twelve years of my life, no questions asked. And all of a sudden I am not sure if I want to keep doing it.”
“Is she really worth it? Is that woman really worth giving up on your career?”
Rowan moved dangerously close and leaned on the desk with his hands “she is worth more that you cold-hearted bastard can ever imagine.”
Lorcan stood “get your arse out of my office, captain Whitethorn. You are suspended for a month.”
“Good.” Said Rowan and walked out slamming the door not bothering saluting Lorcan or add anything.
On his way out he met his squadron “what are you doing back in Orynth?” Asked Gavriel surprised.
“Getting my arse suspended for a month apparently.”
“What the fuck?” Fenrys stared at him in disbelief. That was something that he would do. He could not believe that Lorcan had just suspended Rowan. The man was a stickler for protocol and rules to a fault.
“Broke aviation rules last night by landing during an airspace lockdown. Ticked off ATC big time. And before that I left my post in Doranelle without telling anything to anyone.”
“Who are you and what have you done with Iceman?” Asked Connall.
“Aelin.” Was his answer ���she was at the disaster at the airport last night. She is in bad condition. I had to come back.” He sighed “then Lorcan gave me a dressing down for putting a woman before duty and I might have pissed him off to historical levels. I would stay clear of him today.”
“And he suspended you.”
“Yes,” confirmed Rowan and the rest of the team almost noticed relief in his eyes.
“But you are coming back, right?” Rowan noticed sadness in Gavriel’s eyes. The two had been friends for a long time. And although he could not care less about Lorcan, he felt as if he was betraying his team mates.
“I don’t know… I might.” He said not convinced “A month away might do me well. I am not sure right now.”
“How’s Aelin?” Vaughan had the guts to ask the question no one could voice.
Rowan’s hands fisted “she is in bad shape. Intubated and sedated. When Aedion found her she was not breathing. She has bad burn on her right arm and plenty of other injuries. She was buried under the collapse of the hangar after she tried to save some people trapped inside.”
“Damn, the woman is badass.” Fenrys patted Rowan’s shoulder “when you go to the hospital, tell her that we are rooting for her too.”
He covered the young man’s hand with his “will do.” Then he straightened “now I better go, before Lorcan comes through and punishes all of you just for speaking with me.”
“Keep in touch, please,” added Gavriel.
Rowan winked and left and once he finally stepped outside of the perimeter of the airbase his soul felt lighter.
He reached the hospital not long after and found her room empty, her team was probably at work and he was glad he could have some time with her.
“Hi menace,” Rowan sat down and brushed a kiss on her forehead “are you enjoying your nap?” His finger gently flicked her nose and he sat back down “I got suspended for a month… I guess I broke a few rules to be with you.” His finger brushed hers emerging from the heavy bandage “and I epically ticked off a few people, but it was so worth it.” He squeezed her fingers “you are totally worth it.” He then stood and started walking around the room making adjustments. He fixed the blinds so there was some sun in the room, he tucked her properly in bed, almost afraid she could be cold. He fixed the flowers on her nightstand and made sure they had water. And finally he sat down on her bed and slowly undid her braid, brushed her hair and braided it again.
“I am sorry I left this morning, I… was overwhelmed.” He sat back down on the chair “I am not leaving. Not unless you want me to.” He grabbed her hand again but then he heard the door open and he sat straight.
“Hi,” said Lysandra and Elide in unison.
“We just dropped off some patients and we came in to see her.”
Rowan stood and with his hand he offered his spot to the two women.
“I thought you were away.” Said Lysandra, walking close to her friend and depositing a gentle kiss on her forehead.
“I was, and then I saw the disaster and I flew back and got myself suspended for it, but I don’t care.”
Lysandra was about to comment but he stopped her “I had to be here for her. I have no regrets.” His head then turned to Elide “you might want to stay clear of Lorcan for a few days. I ticked him off big time and the man might be a bit furious at the time.”
“Oh, okay,” the woman said timidly.
“I am sure that one of your smile will fix the mood of that poor old bastard.” Lysandra’s comment made him laugh.
“She just went in…” Lysandra’s voice was now a whisper and she sniffled turning her back from the other two occupants “she always does this type of crazy thing. Dorian was furious.”
A memory appeared in Rowan’s mind and his words were out before he could stop them “are they involved?”
He heard the woman chuckle “No. Dorian is in love with her and that is no secret. He was her captain when she was at west. But she always saw him as nothing but a friend. Also he is the chief and she a captain, so nothing can happen. They are really good friends, but no, nothing ever happened.”
A selfish part of him relaxed.
Lysandra’s radio went off and she groaned “come on Elide, back to work.”
Rowan waved them goodbye and went back to his chair.
***
Ten days had passed and the season had slowly turned and spring was now in full force.
Rowan was standing at the hospital window, looking outside towards the Staghorn mountains. The tops had officially lost their snow. He inhaled the fresh air and closed the window again. That room had become his new home in the past ten days. He had left only to go home and get changed and washed, but apart from that he had kept a tight vigil on her. They guys at the station had to work and he had been more than happy to keep her company. He was out of a job for the time being, anyway. He turned around and walked to the bed. Nothing had changed. She was still intubated and still unconscious. The doctor had raised concerns with regards to the damage her lungs had suffered and a neurologist had confirmed that her responses were within normal parameters and that they were expecting her to wake up soon. In the last few days they had noticed an increased cerebral activity which according to the doctors was a good sign. He sat down again beside her and went back to the book he had been reading to her. As a joke between the two of them he had started reading flight manuals, or any of any of his books about flying. He had read her other books as well and all the possible articles about their amazing rescue at the airport. Rowan had spent so much time at the hospital that all the nurses knew him and helped him every time he had a request for them to make her more comfortable. He had brought more comfortable pillows, had decorated the wall of her room with all the cards she got from the different fire stations and from west, together with the ones of the four people she save in the hangar. With his mobile he had played classical music for her and a few times he had played an opera as well and joked that they finally got that date after all. His past ten days had been dedicated to nothing else but her. He was humming away a tune from the last opera he had played, while tucking her bed sheets properly when he brushed her hand and felt it move. It was a subtle movement but he felt it. Rowan kept humming and this time the motion was much clearer.
“Aelin…” her middle finger lifted by a fraction and Rowan laughed.
“Are you giving me the middle finger even when you sleep? You are such a brat.” He leaned forward and kissed her forehead “Can you hear me?” He whispered near her ear.
His gaze returned to her hand and this time he noticed her clearly trying to bend her fingers.
Rowan sat down beside her and stroked her cheek once more “Aelin… it’s me.”
A tiny flutter of her eyelashes had his heart race madly in his chest. And when her blue eyes finally set on him he gave her a big smile “it was abut time, there was no need to get into a fire and almost get yourself killed if you needed a nap.”
Aelin groaned and he noticed the middle finger in her left hand rise sightly. Rowan roared in laughter. Then she lifted the same hand and went for the tube in her mouth.
“Hold on, you are still intubated. Let me go and call the doctor.” He disappeared outside of the room and came back with her doctor a moment later. He extubated her and the procedure looked very unpleasant. Aelin coughed heavily but the doctor reassured him it was normal and then left the two alone.
Rowan grabbed a glass of water on the nightstand and helped her. He lifted her a bit and pressed the glass against her lips “drink a little.”
She drank eagerly and then collapsed back on the pillow exhausted. Rowan sat at her left side and brushed her head gently with his hand “are you in pain?”
With a small movement she shook her head. Rowan looked at the bags with liquids hanging behind her and noticed they still had plenty of stuff in them. She was hooked on painkillers and antibiotics and had a feeding tube down her nose.
“You… here.” She managed with difficulty. Although she was breathing on her own the doctor had warned him that some issues might take longer to heal. The smoke and the fuel fumes had battered her lungs pretty badly and that it was why after extubation, the doctor had placed small oxygen tubes in her nose.
“That I am.” he took her hand in his “after your text complaining about civilian pilots I had a look at the news and they were showing the inferno at the airport.” He stopped, he would never forget that horrible scene “when I saw Dorian and Aedion carrying you out I realised I could not stay there any longer. Long story short, I broke a few rules, pissed off a few people and got suspended, but I am where I am meant to be.”
“Suspended?”
Rowan nodded solemnly “Turns out that even if he has a girlfriend, Lorcan is still a cold-hearted bastard. I have no regrets.”
Aelin sighed and her breath came out ragged “squad.”
“They are all fine and they miss you. Aedion has been playing captain and he hates it and Dorian has been helping a lot as well. They are on shift now but they came and visit a lot.”
She was about to say something else but a brutal cough hit her and she was left exhausted and wheezing and he pulled her to him. It destroyed him seeing her like that.
He shifted the pillows behind her and allowed Aelin to be in a semi sit position, hoping that would make breathing much easier than lying down. He sat beside her, pulled an arm around her shoulder and dragged her closer to him “Aedion proposed to Lys.”
“Know.”
“There is no pleasing you, young lady. I assume Lys has told you.”
Aelin smiled at him and nodded.
His phone buzzed in his pocket and when he removed it he realised it was Lorcan. The man had tried to phone him all morning but he had refused every single call.
Rowan sighed heavily and Aelin looked up at him with a worried expression.
“I almost resigned.” His forehead touching hers “then I didn’t because of duty and all that shit. When they carried you out I lost it. Nothing else mattered but being here for you. Screw rules and regulations.”
She turned her head and deposited a kiss on his lips “thank you for being here.” She managed with great difficulty.
***
With spring in full swing, Orynth was covered in colours from flowers all around the city. The air smelled sweet and warm.
Aelin inhaled the fresh air and after almost a month in the hospital she felt alive again. Rowan lifted her in his arms and slowly carried her to her house. Her legs were still shaky and she was still weak. Her recovery was taking longer than expected. The doctors had put her through a respiratory therapy, but at times she still felt short of breath. Rowan dropped her off on the sofa and went to get their stuff. He had made a deal with her and he would stay with her until she was better. He still had four days before his suspension was over. He had been at her side since she woke up and the nurses had told her that even when she was still unconscious, Rowan had barely left her side.
Her mind went back to when he told her he could be very caring for the people he loved and he had showed her that over and over again.
“Here we go.” He dumped all the bags in the living room and then went to the bedroom and Aelin had a feeling he was preparing so that it was up to his standards.
“The bed is ready, your highness.”
He fussed. He fussed a lot but she realised she had started to love that side of him.
“Does it meet your standards, captain?”
He grinned “I don’t think is grandiose enough.”
“I will make sure I’ll upgrade my living standards to accommodate a posh boy like yourself. I doubt an army guy will fuss. Aedion never did.”
“They have no standards to begin with.”
Aelin threw a pillow at him but Rowan ducked in time and an instant later she was in the air and he dumped her on the bed with little ceremony.
He leaned forward and kissed her “now get changed,” he ordered and threw her her bed clothes.
“Yes, sir. At your orders sir,” she mocked him with a funny salute.
He shook his head “you civilians really have no respect for rank.”
She stood on her knees in bed and shed the top she was wearing and removed her bra as well, remaining bare.
He was busy emptying her bag that when he turned and saw her semi naked he almost tripped on the dropped top.
“My girls here feel lonely,” she palmed her breasts in a very sensual way
Rowan ignored her and passed her the pyjama top “It seems like you are doing a good job at keeping them busy.”
She slapped him with her t-shirt and got dressed again “I’d better get covered again, I don’t want to traumatise you.” She was about to add something else but a fit of coughing stopped her. Rowan was at her side in a moment and held her, knowing that it would usually leave her spent. The fits had become less frequent as she improved but the occasional one was enough to leave her breathless and this one seemed to be one of those. She grabbed his arm and squeezed it “hurts,”Aelin complained fisting her hand in his chest while concentrating on breathing. Rowan grabbed the inhaler she had been prescribed to use during an attack. She did as she had been shown by the doctors and then melted in his arms.
“Lie down.”
“Open…” she started but the coughing resumed and her hand fisted in the bed sheets this time. She grabbed the inhaler and breathed its medicines again, feeling air rushing back in her lungs. Eventually she collapsed in bed exhausted “Window…” she finally finished.
Rowan moved with speed and did as told. Aelin loved the spring air and even at the hospital she often asked him for the window to be open. It made her feel as if she could breath.
He moved her to the centre of the bed and covered with the blankets “do you feel like eating something?”
“No,” she said weakly and he knew she was not well. In the short time he had known her, Aelin had never refused a meal “Sleep,” his hand brushed her hair and she was asleep within minutes.
Once he was positive she was asleep he walked out and gently closed the door and went to the kitchen to make a phone call. Lorcan had been pestering him almost every day but Rowan had ignored him.
“The dutiful captain finally decides to phone back, or should I call you nurse Whitethorn now?”
Rowan growled and almost closed the call again, then decided to count till ten and listen what he had to say.
“Say your piece Salvaterre and let me go.”
“I want you to march back through these doors in four days.”
Rowan pinched the bridge of his nose. How could he leave her alone?
“A please from time to time doesn’t hurt.”
“Whitethorn, I don’t give a fuck if your firefighter woman made you a well mannered soldier. I am your superior and if I give you an order I expect you to answer with yes, sir. Another peep from you and you get your arse written up for insubordination and you can kiss your career goodbye.”
Rowan had to punch something, but a loud noise could wake up Aelin and he wanted to avoid that. So he just hung up the phone without giving Lorcan a reply then he grabbed a pillow and screamed into it. Once he was done he grabbed his laptop from his bag and set in motion his next plan.
TAGS:
@rowaelinismyotp
@jlinez
@swankii-art-teacher
@courtofjurdan
@whimsicallyreading
@tillyrubes10
#rowaelin#rowan x aelin#rowan whitethorn#aelin galythinius#aedion x lysandra#fanfic#Throne of Glass series
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Damn-Behzinga’s Masterlist
angst - 🌧️
fluff - ☀️
favourite - 👑
⚡ The Eboys ⚡
Will Lenney (Willne)
The Veteran - The reader surprises Will at a panel after fighting in another country for a year. (X Reader) ☀️
Kissing In The Rain - Will’s friends meet his girlfriend for the first time but the couple is to busy having an argument. (X Reader) ☀️
Pancakes, Anyone? - You make breakfast for everyone after a night out and Will realises how much he loves you. (X Reader) ☀️
Nail Polish - You and Will have a pamper night (X Reader) 👑☀️
Moving In - Will and Gee get a new neighbour and Will happens to find her very cute. (X Reader) ☀️
Get Better - Will helps you through a bad day of depression. (X Reader)🌧️
A Little Bit More - Will and Reader recite their vows at their wedding. (X Reader)☀️
Tough Guy - Will and Reader are complete opposites but somehow have a strong bond. (X Reader)☀️
Will’s Friend Otis - Will gets a dog to help with some problems he’s having, Will can’t find his confidence to talk to his friends. (Centric) 👑🌧️
Toxic - Part Two of WFO, a look through social media as Will deals with his mental health 🌧️
Hometown - Part Three of WFO, Will goes home to take care of himself but re-lives the worst memories possible 🌧️
Will Comes Home - Part Four of WFO, Will comes home and tries to do a Livestream. Stephen doesn’t let it happen for obvious reasons. 🌧️
Taking A Leap - You are scared of love, Will isn’t (X Reader) 🌧️
Deserving - You get fired from your job and Will comforts you (X Reader)🌧️☀️
Alex Elmslie (ImAllexx)
First Kiss - You have your first kiss with Alex after he lists the things he loves about you. (X Reader ☀️)
Hurt Me Once - Alex knows what his partner has been getting up to (X Reader)
James Marriott
Enough - Reader is content with the relationship they have with James, they decide to go public. (X Reader) 👑☀️
You Walked In And My Heart Went Boom - Reader and James have a heart to heart at 3am (X Reader)☀️
Grow As We Go - Reader thinks they need to break up with James in order to figure themselves out. Part of the Ben Platt Writing Challenge (X Reader)🌧️☀️
George (Memeulous)
Protective - George gets protective when Reader gets assaulted, he decides to do something about it. (X Reader) 🌧️☀️
Temporary Love - George doesn’t want this to be a one-time thing… Part of the Ben Platt Writing Challenge (X Reader) 👑🌧️☀️
✨ SIDEMEN ✨
Ethan Payne (Behzinga)
Baby Behzinga Meets Her Uncles - The Sidemen meet your month old daughter (X Reader) 👑☀️
“Dad, Can’t you hear me?” - Ethan opens up about his dad, the sidemen don’t realise how truly scary it is. (Centric)🌧️
Hush Hush - You are JJ’s best friend, he warned his friends not to date you, Ethan doesn’t listen. (X Reader)☀️🌧️
After Meeting A Little Early - You and Ethan have a son at the age of seventeen. the sidemen love him to pieces. (X Reader)☀️
Happy Hours - Ethan talks about you and your son on the Happy Hour podcast. Part 2 of AMALE (X Reader)☀️
Hooked - after a little too much drinking after JJ V Logan Paul, you and Ethan hook up (X Reader) ☀️
Doubt - Ethan has his doubts about being a father but you easily soothe him. (X Reader) 🌧️☀️
Top - Ethan sees you wearing his top and he decides to tell you something. (X Reader) ☀️
Losing The War Against Himself - Ethan is losing the war against his depression but other soldiers are going to fight beside him and help him win. (Cenric) 🌧️
Falling On The Battle Field - Ethan tries to take his own life, the sidemen try to cope (Centric) Part Two of LTWAH 🌧️
I Can’t Wait For Forever - The Sidemen film your’s and Ethan’s weddings, here are the fan favourite bits (X Reader)☀️
Secrets Always Come To Surface - Ethan’s secret gets revealed when someone appears out of the blue. (Centric)🌧️
Together In Isolation - Ethan loves to spend time with you in quarantine (X Reader)☀️
A Painful Memory - The Sidemen Roast is all fun and games until someone jokes about Ethan’s friend who passed away. (X Reader)🌧️
Fitting In - Ethan introduces you to his friends, you get a bit insecure because you’re a bit bigger then other girls (X Reader) 🌧️☀️
To Be Free Again - Ethan gets into a car accident and has to learn to walk again. There are moments where he wanted to give up but he quickly had his friends help him feel better again. These are some of those moments. (centric)🌧️
Dumb Ass Love - If Ethan had to chose between men being horrid to you or a bloody nose, he would chose the latter. (X Reader) ☀️
Unclear - Ethan’s addicted to heroin, the boys have to find a way to help him (Centric)🌧️
Best Couple On YouTube - You and Ethan take part in Simon’s Best Couple On YouTube series. (X Reader) ☀️
Unconventional Family - Ethan meets his half sister for the first time and he decides she should meet his family, the sidemen.(OC & Ethan Centric)☀️
Heart Pains - Ethan has a lot of things that he wanted to do before he hit thirty, having a heart attack and almost dying was not one of them. (Centric) 🌧
Harry Lewis (Wroetoshaw)
Tranquil - You and Harry are soft when others aren’t around. (X Reader)☀️
livestream - harry watches your livestream and realises you’re not okay (X Reader)🌧️☀️
What He Thinks - Not What He Is - Harry finished filming with the weight gained video and he feels terrible about himself so you have to teach him otherwise (X Reader)🌧️☀️
Moment To Moment - This is Harry’s story of his relationship with an abusive woman. (Centric) 👑🌧️
Flustered - Harry gets flustered when a pretty girl comes in for a speed dating video (X Reader)☀️
Medication - Harry suffers from bipolar disorder and has medication, it’s awkward when his friends find out. (Centric)🌧️
Surprise - Harry thinks the biggest surprise of the day was the boys forgetting his birthday, little does he know. (Centric)🌧️☀️
Waltzing - You teach the Sidemen to waltz, Harry gets partnered up with you (X Reader)☀️
Date Night In Isolation - The activities you and Harry get up to in quarantine. (X Reader)☀️
Unexpected But Adorable - You and Harry are famous Youtubers, no one expects your relationship (X Reader)☀️
Nightmares - You have vivid nightmares, thankfully, Harry knows what to do. (X Reader) 🌧️☀️
Cuddle Time - Harry wants to cuddle, the boys happily oblige. (Centric) ☀️
Taken Over - Harry has a seizure after a shoot, the guys help him. (Centric) 🌧️
JJ Olatunji (KSI)
Helpless - You perform your first show as Eliza Schylur for the music Hamilton and JJ supports you. (X Reader) ☀️
Jealous, Babe? - You watch Jaackmaate, JJ is jealous (X Reader) ☀️
Caring - JJ takes care of you whilst your sick (X Reader) ☀️
Not To Blame - You go to a party with all your friends, the night takes a twisted turn and JJ tries to understand it. (X Reader/platonic or romantic) 🌧️
Josh Bradley (Zerkaa)
Not Your Anxiety - The Sidemen don’t know how to handle Josh’s panic attack, luckily Freya is the best. (centric) 🌧️
Hard Worker Shouldn’t Over Work - Josh tends to overwork himself but luckily has amazing friends surrounding him. (centric)🌧️☀️
Mine - You love Josh. Josh loves you. If only love were that simple. (X Reader) 🌧
Vik Barn (Vikkstar123)
Not Just Banter - Sometimes, Sidemen banter goes too far and Vik needs comforting (X Reader) 🌧️☀️
Meeting On Minecraft - You and Vik met online playing Minecraft and now you meet in real life (X Reader) ☀️
Tobi Brown (tbjzl)
Small Comments - You and Tobi promised each other that you wouldn’t go public, so why was the comment left in the video? (X Reader) 🌧️☀️
Falling - You and Tobi were on the lowdown, but what is he doing with that other girl? (X Reader)🌧️
Simon Minter (Miniminter)
Antics - You and Simon have a fun night out and have to get your drunken selves home (X Reader) ☀️
Simon In The Bathroom - Simon gets ditched by his one friend at a party, now he’s alone in the bathroom (Centic) 🌧️
THE GROUP
Acceptance - You come out to the sidemen as a bisexual (Sidemen & Non-specified reader)
🔥 + FRIENDS 🔥
Stephen Lawson (StephenTries)
Brother’s Best Friend - You are Will’s twin sister and Stephen might be developing an itsy bitsy, small crush on you. (X Reader) ☀️
Callum McGinley (Callux)
The Most Confident - Cal meets Harry’s old school friend, he likes her immediately but is she too cool for him? (X Reader) 🌧️☀️
Talia Mar
Strawberries + Cigarettes- Talia reveals her relationship with the reader through her music video for her song Strawberries + Cigarettes (X Reader) ☀️
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Must Have Done Something in a Past Life (To Deserve This)
Summery: Being in the Entity’s realm, some of course wonder what they did to deserve it; some joke maybe they did something in a past life or something
(Never noticing how a certain nervous leader twitched at that)
Warning: Mentions and Acts of bullying, Cruelty, animal abuse, Past toxic/abusive relationships, some mentions of murder.
(So, I got inspired :3 Of course my SI-OC side would come into play, and Dead By Daylight will not be missed. Tho, mind the tags, as this SI-OC... yeah, they were not a good person, so make sure to be mindful of your health.)
============================================
When Dwight Fairfield was young, he’s always had dreams. Dreams of being popular, making friends, making it big in life, being a winner... But most of his bullies usually destroyed those dreams rather easily, locking him in lockers, pushing his head in a toilets, messing and even destroying his things, and generally just beating him up, writing over him Loser in permeant marker.
His first year of high school had certainly been a learning experience, though probably not in the way his teachers expected. Dwight might not have the best grades in the school, but even with all the shit he put up with and missing/ripped homework, he always managed to get by at least; he was adaptable if nothing else. He learned to watch the halls, learned who would be willing to let him hide from the bullies or at least would turn a blind eye to him if he passed by, wouldn’t call them to attention for a quick smackdown. He learned to keep his head down, learned to watch and wait and calculate other’s schedule’s and habits, to avoid the worst of the assholes who got a kick out of life by trying to kick him out of it.
But nothing, not all the skills and tricks he could muster up could compete with Lady Luck’s bad side.
It happened when one of his worst bully’s deciding to skip, just as the glasses wearing youth decided to go to the restroom that the unfortunate bump in happened.
“Ah, look, how you’ve been Dwight, long time no see.” was said rather cheerfully, the Bully wrapping an arm around the rapidly paling teen, Dwight refusing to say anything, least he provide fodder for that wicked look in the other’s eyes, the embers their not yet blazing at least. But still, he did nod, knowing that if he didn’t respond it would just provoke the other even worse. (So either way, he was going to suffer, but at least this way he could minimize as much risk as he could. He would gamble in ways he knew had some payoff, always watching the others face and hands with his own eyes, moving his head as little as possible.)
“You know, after so long apart, we should really do something to celebrate, right? Especially since we won’t see each other over the summer.” the stronger, taller, and very much built man said, arm going tight on Dwights shoulder, making him wince, stoking that wicked glee in the other’s eye.
‘Oh, this is not going to be fun.’ the nerdy teen thought, the world easily proving how right that was, his bully calling up some of his ‘friends’ as he did.
And they even brought ‘supplies’.
With Duct tape all wrapped around him and forcing him in place, stuck to the wall as he was, Dwight could only sit and take it as random items from balls to rocks were thrown at him, the youth doing his best to dodge as much as he could with the little head movement he could manage.
(He really, really didn’t want to break his glasses again; he’s managed to go half the year without incident.)
Though, with every hit coming closer to his head, with ever slam of a item against his body and the wall, a migraine started to form, making Dwight feel even fainter then he did before. Something also seemed to be going on with his sight as well, flashes of red seeming to appear before his eyes here and there. The teens across from his seemed to change as well, shadows of men in dark uniforms across him instead.
Dwight honestly felt like he was going to be sick. But then, in a moment of inattention, something hit him hard before he knew nothing but darkness.
----
A young child, watching ants crawl all around, before with a bored expression, squishing them one by one.
A preteen, being sweet one moment with their dog before cruelty hitting it over and over the minute it did something wrong.
A young teen, sweetly smiling up at the lady he just helped up, even as they stole her wallet with ease.
A young adult, gently breaking up with their devoted girlfriend, knowing this would be the last thing to send them over the edge.
An adult, ever so charming and popular, even as their body count keeps rising in their shadow.
This killer finally meeting their end, messing with the heart of someone who already had many admirers, tied up and yet still smiling, even as someone pulls out a gun.
“I’ve always wondered what was after death.” was said with that same gentle grin, those eyes so wicked even still as the bullet finally hits them.
(Oh, how they find out; they finally found something in this world to fill that emptiness in them.)
-------
Ever since that incident, with Dwight having to visit the hospital thanks to the bullies going to far, things have been different. For one, the school had to actually punish the bullies, suspending them and having this go on their permeant records, seeing as one of the bullies had actually been livestreaming the event in it’s entirety.
This had the blessed effect of number two; with the school being cracked down on, Dwight was blessedly left alone the next two months before the Summer Holidays. Sure, there was some snide comments and the occasional shove, but otherwise, Dwight wasn’t complaining.
Not when he had other things to complain about.
‘Oh, and here I thought I was being the model roommate.’ was said ever so innocently, Dwight having to close his eyes when he heard it, ‘By the way, you forgot to carry the seven.’
Number three; the new voice that suddenly took up residence in his head. A Voice that came with a bunch of disturbing memories, a morbid sense of humor, and ironically a good teacher.
‘Doesn’t hurt having a good student; now come on, you just have a few more questions to look through and then you don’t have to worry about looking at math for the rest of the summer.’ is said by the Voice.
“And do what for the rest of the summer?” Dwight grumbled, opening his eyes once more to his drab little room as he went on with his math sheet, making sure to carry the 7 now in his division, which ended up making much more sense.
‘Many things; maybe go to the movies, play those games you like, kill time and maybe some people, oh, you can learn a new language.’ the Voice said ever so causally.
Dwight used to wonder what he did in a past life to deserve the shit he went through; he really wish it could have gone unanswered, like with other people.
“...I might take you up on the language thing.” the young nerd said, looking over to a few of his manga and comics he had to the side, before he went to work back at his homework; it really was almost done, being the last of the summer homework he worked through with the voice in his head.
‘And I do believe it’s about time you stopped calling me that; I am more then just a voice after all.’ said Voice reminded him, the young teen twitching at that.
(Giving people names... made them apart of the world, made them someone who also had their own choices and decisions all around them... It made them real...)
“... Sure, Janus.” Dwight said, knowing the other would prefer that over their ‘actual’ name instead.
(All the while, Janus, or Dwight Jackson, huffed in the mind they found themselves in; before, they had always been so empty, never wanting to be alone, but so bored, so dull with everyday life and all it’s idle entertainments. Even killing was boring after a while, the thrill of it all becoming much too easy, much too routine after so long doing it and never being caught. It’s what made him decide to end it all in the first place and go out with a bang.
But watching someone else live their life, watching someone else struggle, claw their way to stay above society’s waters, watching each and every move this Dwight made, to survive on top of it all...
Well, Janus really couldn’t get enough of it to be honest; he could probably watch for eternity and not get bored, actually feeling alongside Dwight.)
{All the while this goes on, neither notice the darkness in town, traveling the streets, wrapping around his home, eager and waiting.}
====================================
Writer Notes:
:D
Dwight is such a fun character to play around with; so nervous, and yet capable, is a leader despite everything, can be a petty little shit when he wants, and yet so kind too. yeah, giving him a past life as a serial killer was mean, but so much fun, especially since the two of them are part of the Whole.
Janus: Charming, Seductive, easily bored, is ironically more of a follower then a leader; he would be a really competent as a right hand man or second in command; he just never found anyone worthy to follow, feeling ever so empty in his life.
Dwight: Awkward, Introverted, is actually someone that is a natural born leader and can stand his own, but because of his environment he grew up in, he ended up burying those talents to try and fit in.
(The two of them, above all else, hate being alone more than anything.)
Hope you all enjoyed it!
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This is not hate but how can you support someone like pewdiepie after all hes done? I feel like it's wrong to put him with Jack because sometimes i feel like jacks his friend only because he feels he needs to because of the shoutout. Don't stan him with Jack or associate him with him please. Pewdiepie is a bad influence and a white supremacist
Ok. Let’s talk. I was going to ignore this but you’re really persistent. This is the fifth ask you have sent me telling me the same thing but in different ways. Sad thing is that I just started this blog, I can’t believe this keeps happening to me in every fandom I go to. Some of you need to understand something about Felix.
Yes, I’m aware he did a lot of questionable things. And no, he’s not a white supremacist. He’s not racist. And he’s not homophobic or whatever Twitter/the media is saying about him these days. I might not know him personally but I’ve been watching Felix since the very beginning and even with this little info about his life I can tell the difference between some things people choose to ignore about him. He’s a very honest person and he always tells everyone the information they need to know about him, whether it is about his personal life or his pewdiepie persona. His real actual friends (Jack, Ken, Mark -also good people, and whether you like it or not, Jack is one of them) held him accountable for the things he did and also made sure to assure everyone that the ‘Pewdiepie’ personality is totally different than his real-self. They confirmed he’s not any of his mistakes. Meaning the ‘Pewdiepie’ personality got too far and the facade/entertainment mask fell off of him when he made those mistakes. This was not only a lesson for him but it showed him places that needed real improvement in his life, something we all need sometimes. We all fall short in understanding the potential harm we can do to others and we easily face the temptation to define ourselves by ignoring those crucial parts. What Felix needed to learn was self-awareness. And he’s now constantly working on it so he can objectively evaluate himself when it comes to those things. Some people face this alone and privately but, him, as an internet sensation had to do it on camera.
Pay attention to what his actual friends say about him. Jack himself said it:
‘It is strange, all the stuff that gets said about him, it’s kind of weird to see that being said about a friend of yours. To hear his actual thoughts on it…people like to take things every which way and twist things all over the place. I don’t know how he does it, with that many people on you and that much scrutiny on you constantly. I think I would have lost my mind by now.’
I’m also aware he’s a white rich guy and that he’s a step up on the scale from me and other people but I’m sure that if I dig long enough, I’m going to find something about certain actors/actresses/musicians (that most likely you and other people love) as well. Meaning they’re human at the end of the day and they might make mistakes too. Felix is the same case here.
It was dumb to say certain things and do certain things? YES. I held him accountable when he did those things. He didn’t need to say or do the things he did. It was irresponsible, harmful and immature from his part. However, he’s willing to make a change and work on it so this is something I can appreciate.
He did the fivver video. This is his statement:
‘I make videos for my audience. I think of the content that I create as entertainment, and not a place for any serious political commentary. I know my audience understand that and that is why they come to my channel. Though this was not my intention, I understand that these jokes were ultimately offensive. I think it’s important to say something and I want to make one thing clear: I am in no way supporting any kind of hateful attitudes.’
his response.
He said the ‘n’ word. He sincerely apologized. This is his statement:
‘I hate how I personally fed into that part of gaming. It was something that was said in the heat of the moment. I said the worst word I could possibly think of and it slipped out. I’m not going to make excuses to why I did it because there are not excuses for it. I’m dissappointed in myself because it seems like I learned nothing from controversies. And it’s not like I think I can do or say whatever I want and get away with it. I’m just an idiot but that doesn’t make what I said or how I said it okay. It was not okay. I’m really sorry If I offended, hurt or disappointed anyone with all of this. Being in the position I am, I should know better. I know I can’t keep messing up like this and I owe it to my audience and to myself to do better than this. I really want to improve and better myself, not just for me but for anyone that looks up to me or anyone that is influenced by me and that’s how I wanna move forward. Away from this.’
source: my response.
He:
Held himself accountable.
Made no excuses for his behaviour.
Recognized he did something wrong and stupid.
Sincerely apologized for it without making a fake act or fake crying for sympathy.
Never asked for sympathy or support because he's willing to make a real change in behavior.
Realized some people are influenced by him and worked to be better for them and himself.
Chose to be himself and stand his ground on an important matter to make his audience understand he was taking this as serious as it is.
Understood he gave ammunition that feeds some people the wrong idea and didn’t try to rationalize it because he knows he should take accountability for it.
Saw that he had no need for jokes or words like that in his vocabulary in the first place and worked on self-control.
Rightfully feels ashamed for his actions.
Here you can see Felix takes this seriously. He’s not messing around with what happened. He takes it with the responsibility it should be taken.
And this is enough for me. I’m sorry if you think Felix needs to do a blood sacrifice to prove himself but that’s just not how it works.
We all have said or done things we are not proud of. He did many of them and trust me, he was held accountable for them. How? Here’s a list of the consequences:
He was part of the original content network YouTube Red, and was affiliated with Disney’s MakerStudios brand where he had his own network. Disney cut all ties with him.
They cancelled his YouTube Red show, where a lot of people put big effort (not only the participants but the crew members). You can see that this was important for him. It was not just some random ass show.
Was held accountable for his actions and it was made known every mistake he did. Every single one.
Received the proper criticism from the media, his fans and his own friends.
He also received harsh backlash and hate from the situation.
Lost support from followers, celebrities, friends and companies.
He’s constantly attacked by people and media outlets on a daily basis. Some people even fabricate false stories about him.
He faced the proper consequences for those actions. Let him move on already.
You also listed a bunch of stuff in one of your asks, things he’s NEVER done. Those are things the media has made you and everyone else believe he did but he didn’t. This is why you should never believe any random media headline, you need to actually do your own research to see if that’s true or not. Here are the things you said he did (none of these are true):
No, he hasn’t hired people to say the ‘n’ word. This is not true at all.
No, he doesn’t promote Adolf Hitler speeches and anti-semitic cartoons. Disney did once tho.
No, he’s not homophobic. At all. He was actually evicted from his own flat because his previous landlord is an actual homophobic person and called him and his crew the ‘f’ word. He decided to move far away from the guy.
No, he didn’t perform the Nazi heil. Never.
No, he didn’t pay the ‘Jesus’ guy to hold a sign that says ‘Hitler did nothing wrong’ this is a lie. Someone else did it and the media said it was him to cause more controversy. He paid him to say ‘Subscribe to Jacksepticeye’.
No, he’s not racist. For this, his content would’ve to be filled with racial jokes and actual intentional attacks daily. His content is not like that, trust me, the most he does is play with some tambourine all the time. He’s said the ‘n’ word (something he admitted was terrible, apologized for it and took responsibility for his words), yes but someone that feels as bad and ashamed as he does, does not equal to what an actual racist is and how they act.
No, he didn’t dress up in a Klansman robe. He never did that. This is also false information about him.
No, he doesn’t bully his friends or enables bullying. I don’t know where the media got that one but I can assure you they’ve got no friends if they think his interactions with his own friends are ‘bullying’.
No, he doesn’t joke about crises happening around the world. AT ALL. He constantly raises money for them (and gives his own money as well) to different causes such as the Wildfires Emergency Appeal, Team Trees (to plant 20 million trees), St. Jude Children’s Research Hospital (for kids with diseases such as cancer), Crisis Text Line, National Alliance on Mental Illness (a group that helps those suffering from mental illness), CRY (a GoFundMe campaign to help Indian children living in poverty), World Wildlife Fund (dedicated to the reduction of mankind’s environmental impact), RED (did a whole 7 hour livestream with friends to help people fighting HIV/AIDS in Africa), Charity: Water (a non-profit that provides drinking water to developing nations), Save the Children (for underprivileged kids to give them better education, healthcare, better economic opportunities), he recently raised $106,000 for the BLM movement donating the contributions to the family of George Floyd and other victims of police violence, Cincinnati Children’s Hospital, Hope for Holt, Malaria No More, Oceana, SpecialEffect, War Child, etc. Does this sound like someone who makes fun of real problems happening around the globe? No. And no, he hasn’t made fun of those causes either.
No, he doesn’t make fun of mental illnesses. He talks about it with the proper respect and delicacy it deserves. He constantly adresses mental health, shares resources for viewers who may be struggling and talks about the importance of being aware and getting legitimate help. Where are you taking these facts from?
No, he doesn’t support China’s police brutality. He was BANNED from China for critizing the president and the country’s treatment of Hong Kong’s anti-government protests. How hard is it to watch the real video instead of trusting some Susan from Twitter?
No, he has NEVER disrespected Japanese culture. Felix loves Japan and respects their culture. He always treats the people and the place with utter respect.
He’s not a white supremacist or a secret Nazi. Are you insane? He’s said it himself ‘f*** anyone who is racist and anyone who is a white nationalist. That’s not what I’m about. And that’s not what my channel has been about either.’ Maybe if you think about it, the media painted him that way and people decided to go with it because they don’t actually watch his videos. The number of accusations and stories are insane and ridiculous. Have you ever watched one of his videos? Ever? Because if you would’ve, you would know none of these things are true.
No, he doesn’t encourage kids/teens to see and follow Nazi ethics. He recommended a channel that does anime reviews (he didn’t know the channel had pro white-supremacy videos). You’re accusing him of that for not checking the thousand-something videos said channel has because he liked one anime review? This is reaching to a whole new degree. You could’ve randomly watched the same anime review vid, does that make you a Nazi as well? And NO, he didn’t wear an Iron Cross, he was wearing a Georgian Bolnisi cross. The shirt is by the Georgian designer Demna Gvasalia. Use Google please.
I don’t think you’re a real Jacksepticeye fan if you think he’s sticking up for him only because of a shout-out that happened years ago. Extend your perspective in this. He knows him in real-life. He’s his best friend. He can tell he’s not a bad person. This is not a hard thing to figure out.
Also, you forgot to put the anon option in one of your asks, so I know who you are. Weren’t you joking about WW3, using the ‘r’ word to fight with your followers and making fun of the BLM movement a few months ago on your twitter account? It might not look like it’s possible but we’ve also made and are capable of making some of the same mistakes too. The difference is that some of you hide behind the ‘it’s just humor to cope with life’ gen z card. Joking about a serious important movement is harmful as well, hope you can learn that.
I can’t tell you how to emotionally react to his content, however I can advise that if it bothers you that much you should remove yourself from the environment that revolves around him (if you even watch his videos which I highly doubt) if you’re not willing to give him a chance. You also need to remember that forgiveness is private and personal, just because you don't see his content and can't see that change doesn't mean it's not happening. There’s power in understanding.
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cover me with stuff
happy happy birthday to @petrodobreva!!! also available on ao3.
“What just happened?”
Patrick’s breath is coming fast, eyes darting between the back door and where David’s standing in the kitchen. “Um,” he clears his throat. “Nothing. Not a thing. No things.”
“Ah,” David nods. “No things. Would you like to try for something more believable?” After an afternoon of organizing folding chairs in the yard behind the store for a watercolor class the next day, he doesn’t really have the patience for their usual thing, where Patrick talks around his problem until David can suss it out for himself. He might have saved the patience if Roland hadn’t insisted on helping him. David knows that Jocelyn didn’t have to loan him the chairs, but the presence of her husband still felt like too high a price.
Patrick goes to lean against the back door but overshoots and has to use his arm to brace himself. “There’s a snake in the hydrangeas.”
David wrinkles his nose. “This is one of your worst euphemisms.”
“Ew,” Patrick says with feeling. “That’s—I hate snakes.”
“Was it a big snake?” David turns to peek out the kitchen window; he can see a bucket half-filled with weeds and soil spread out where Patrick had abandoned the gardening to find cover. “Should we call someone? Ray was talking about animal control at Twyla’s last party, but I can honestly say that I lost the thread and don’t know if it’s a new business of his or not.”
Patrick shakes his head, cheeks still flushed from his run. David narrows his eyes and looks a little closer. “Garter snake.”
“And you are...allergic to garter snakes?”
“I hate snakes.” Patrick looks at David then, and the look in his eyes makes clear that it’s not exertion but embarrassment turning his cheeks red.
“Aw.” David frowns exaggeratedly. He can sympathize; there was a millipede in the store last week. “Gross. Well, hopefully the snake goes away soon.”
“You don’t have to—” Patrick’s voice goes sharp like it does when they fight. David’s pretty sure this shouldn’t be a fight, so it’s...off. Something’s off. But Patrick inhales and lets it out slowly. “I hate that I’m scared of those stupid things.”
“Um, have we met?” David turns toward the cabinets but keeps Patrick in his sight. “I’m scared of many things.”
“But yours make sense.” Patrick runs a hand over his eyes. “Like the parasailing thing. Who wouldn’t hate heights after that?”
David takes Patrick in without being too obvious. He’s doing that thing with his lower lip that’s adorable and infuriating in equal measure. It’s probably technically a pout, but neither of them want to admit that. David can only make fun of it when he’s being condescending, but Patrick normally doesn’t bring this particular expression out unless it’s something serious that David can’t be petty about. Infuriating, really, because he has so few things he can poke at Patrick about. “You know that a fear doesn’t have to be logical, right? Like, sometimes it is. But I was terrified of my mom’s eyelet lace clutch for a year after she told me it was poisonous. That’s not logical.”
Patrick’s lip stops doing the horrifying thing, which is progress. And the light of teasing is back in his eyes, so David counts it as a win. “Why did she say it was poisonous?”
“She knew I was plotting to steal it.” David waves a hand. “Not important. As long as you can still take care of any and all moths, we don’t have a problem here.”
“Where did the moth thing come from?”
David can play this game. “Where did the snake thing come from?”
Patrick makes a face that’s less horrifying and more funny. David loves his husband and always wants to see him happy, of course, but. It’s fun to see him squirm. “I give.”
But something still isn't quite right. About Patrick’s face. David shakes his head. No, he loves Patrick’s face and all the things it does. Especially—ahem. He’s getting off track. “What else is going on?” He reaches behind Patrick into the wine fridge and grabs a bottle Patrick likes. Or at least David’s pretty sure he likes it—he grabbed three bottles last time they went to the first vineyard that didn't sell banana wine within five hours. It’s not a huge leap he’s making.
“Nothing else is going on.” Patrick looks up at the ceiling, which is one of his more obvious tells.
A memory from their belated honeymoon to Toronto wakes up and kicks around David’s head. Patrick had gotten all worked up about getting a migraine, moaning into the dark hotel room that this wasn’t what David had signed up for, as though he wouldn’t want to be there for any part of Patrick. “Hey,” he says lightly as he reaches for the corkscrew in the drawer. He keeps Patrick trapped between the counter and his arms—he doesn’t want Patrick to slip away from this conversation, slithering away like—ew. Screw this day for making him think so much about snakes. “What else?”
“It’s—I just don’t want you to have to. To be with me when I’m—this isn’t—”
“My kingdom for a conclusion,” David says mostly to himself. But they’re pressed in close, so Patrick fixes him with a look. He winces and sets about being soothing. “You’re not making me do anything.”
Patrick rolls his eyes and crosses his arms. David thinks he can probably make fun of this move, but. He’ll wait to test the theory. “You didn’t sign up for—”
“I signed up for you,” David says. He tucks the you idiot back behind his teeth. He senses it will not aid his mission. “Warts and all. Or, um, some other non-amphibious reference.”
“Snakes and frogs are totally different.”
“And we’ll get right back to that deflection after we finish this,” David says sternly. “You didn’t know that I would break my arm in two places the week before our first anniversary, but you still saved me from Stevie’s attempts to deface my cast with doodles. And you didn’t know that my parents would basically move in with us for nearly a month after Sunrise Bay wrapped again.”
“That’s different.” Patrick’s being stubborn, which, water is wet, so it’s not exactly news.
“Because it’s me?” Patrick never minds soothing David’s worries, or talking him down from spirals, or letting him pluck at his shoulders while he works through distressing thoughts.
“No, David.” Patrick uncrosses his arms and pulls at David’s hips until David sways forward. “Because it’s—hard. It’s hard for me.”
“It’s hard for me too, you know.” David shakes his head. That’s not exactly right. “It is in the beginning. To trust that you’ve—got it. That you can handle the hard stuff, or the embarrassing stuff.” He resolutely does not think about wet sheets and aborted livestreams.
“But I can,” Patrick reminds him. Then he breathes out into the space that he’s made for himself against David’s neck. “And you can.”
David wiggles, but gently. He doesn’t want to dislodge Patrick. “I can.”
Patrick’s arms tighten around him, then loosen just enough for David to grab both bottle and corkscrew again. They’ve both earned a drink.
“You’re really good at this,” Patrick says, looking far too impressed. David’s done the corkscrew before. “I feel very supported.”
“I wish I could say I got that all the time.” David plays it up because he knows it will make Patrick smile. He straightens his back and pulls away from the cage of Patrick’s arms so he can watch the way his husband’s mouth turns down in fondness before the happiness takes hold.
Patrick clears his throat, then turns and reaches for the glasses. “A shame,” he agrees. “Especially since you’re so supportive that you won’t make me go back out there. Really kind that you’re going to weed the flower beds for me.”
“I support you,” David says. He thinks fast; doing one outdoor chore might open a door that he can’t close. And he’d rather die than mow a lawn, even if it’s his own. “And because I support you, I also support you facing your fears.”
“I’ll remember that when the next moth needs rehoming.”
“Fine.” David sets his wine glass down and crosses into the kitchen; he’ll get the weeds in the morning. Stevie’s coming over to crash between trips, so if he plays his cards right he’ll make it through the chore without getting any dirt on the knees of his jeans. “But we’re having spaghetti for dinner because now I’m thinking about noodles.”
Patrick chokes on his wine. “Why would you ruin pasta for me while I’m in this fragile state?”
#schitt's creek fanfiction#schitt's creek fanfic#schitt's creek fic#schitts creek fanfiction#schitts creek fanfic#schitts creek fic#david x patrick#also HUGE thanks to#rockinhamburger#for basically all of this#my fic
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Typing the Turtles (ROTTMNT) Part 1 - Raphael
This started out as an investigation into the turtles’ insecurities, because one thing the show does so well is demonstrate that they are still teenagers. And being a teenager is a confusing experience - there’s angst, drama, exploring one’s identity, a lot of growth, and overall figuring out who you are. That’s a messy process, too! And we see this mess in our turtles: they mess up, they’re learning, they self-doubt, they have fears and insecurities, but they’re also discovering their strengths and how to overcome their inner obstacles.
So after thinking about all this way too long, here’s my psychological breakdown of each turtle (I’ll be referencing MBTI and the Enneagram, but will include links for more general information on those if you don’t know what I’m talking about).
Raph: ISFJ, 6w5
The Defender, The Loyalist, The Big Brother, did I mention The Defender?
Raph is always helping out the little guy, whether that little guy is Mikey, Donnie, Leo, April or someone else. In the first episode, Mystic Mayhem, Raph is the one who notices poor Mayhem alone and scared, and suggests they should help him. He just met the little furball, and even after Mayhem attacks his face he’s still ready to fight some dog-jogger Yokai to protect him. He’s there when April’s school is attacked by Hypno (Hypno! Part Deux) and when she just needs her fan fixed (Repairin’ the Baron). He’s also there for a myriad of underdogs, such as Guy Flambe (Pizza Puffs). Interestingly enough, that episode also indicates that Raph has taken to moonlighting as the hero Red Angel of Preventing Harm.
Raph at his Worst: What is Raph afraid of? Beyond Mrs. Cuddles. Raph is afraid of being alone. But he also feels strongly empathetic when others are alone: Mikey on a solo mission in Hot Soup: The Game, Mayhem in the pilot, Frankenfoot when he runs away. But why?
If we look through the lens of the Enneagram, Raph wants security and support. The system/structure he is most committed to is their inner circle of family/friends. So nothing must happen to those he loves!
Raph has also demonstrated Worst-Case Scenario thinking when he’s stressed. Alone for 5 minutes in Man vs Sewer? Expect the worst. In Nothing but Truffles, Mikey even flashes back to a Raph lecture about what to do in the event of a: shark attack, vampire attack, werewolf attack, and puppy attack.
That said, when someone does hurt someone he loves, or sufficiently threatens/scares him and/or his support system, all his disaster-planning goes out the window in an effort to SMASH IT LIKE A BOSS! (Counterphobic 6).
He puts a lot of pressure on himself, but it’s not really about failing in big moments (as Leo describes it in Mystic Mayhem and Down with the Sickness, but that says more about Leo than Raph), but more about letting the others down. He needs to open the gateway to the Mystic City or else they’ll lose April forever. He needs to think of something to ask for in the Must Say Yes stage that will please all his brothers and not leave anyone out. And, in Insane in the Mama Train, Raph is the one most affected when Splinter says he’s disappointed. The others were willing to brush it off and apologize, but Raph is aware that they let Splinter down. It’s something worse, and he feels that hurt, deeply.
Raph is also sensitive enough that he sometimes takes things too personally. When Mikey and Donnie have a good idea in One Man’s Junk, he internalizes it as ‘Raph never has a good idea’. Mikey sorts that out the best: “We’re not saying you don’t have good ideas, Raph. We’re just saying we do, too.” It seems to snap him out of self-deprecating funk.
Average Raph: Raph wants to protect those he loves from physical threats, but also emotional ones. That’s why he’s so bad at handling interpersonal conflict. He can’t yell at Donnie in Donnie’s Gifts. He can’t yell at (Mike? Lou? Tony?) in the Pizza Pit because “it’ll destroy him”. He’s super conflict-averse when it comes to those he cares about. He doesn’t want to hurt anyone’s feelings (ISFJ). Mostly this is a kind, caring, compassionate trait, but sometimes the situation needs Dr. Delicate Touch.
He’s the supportive friend and brother. He’s always ready to help out, whether it’s fixing April’s fan (Repairin’ the Baron), rescuing Guy Flambe from Meatsweats (Pizza Puffs) or saving Mayhem from the mirror. He’s encouraging… but sometimes to the point of enabling. In Pizza Puffs he recognizes this the most and literally wrestles with himself over trying to let his brothers fix problems on their own without him there to protect them. Sometimes he can’t help but support his friends even when he doesn’t want to: when he’s volun-told by Mikey to help warm Draxum up to humans, he doesn’t ditch, and when April invokes the Birthday Card to help Warren Stone he honors it. He can be dedicated and loyal to a fault.
He can be a little short-sighted, at times. His team-building exercise in Stuck On You was meant to be a positive, brotherly, bonding experience, but suffered from serious drawbacks. His tenacity in smashing foes is admirable, but doesn’t always get the best results, something Donnie tries to get him to see and think through. But they’re also what makes him a force to be reckoned with. You do NOT mess with Raph’s inner circle and expect NOT to get smashed, hoss! And the fact that his brothers know that he has their backs like this is probably its own form of support and security.
Raph at his Best: He believes in the Mad Dogs the most, that they can be and are heroes. “We’re do-gooders! And what do do-gooders do? They do good! And they do good well.” (The Mutant Menace) His compassion and commitment to protecting the underdog keep the others on track and in line with their goals. He is the rock in the middle of the chaos.
Raph actually has good practical skills: he has the mission calendar that only he seems to consistently stick to, and clearly enough self-discipline to responsibly and reliably sleep with his retainer on every night (Flushed, But Not Forgotten)
He also has the most grounded sense of duty. When they’re watching the skateboarding livestream in Gilbert’s Department store in The Longest Fight, Raph is the one who first investigates what sounds like a robbery, and is the one who cajoles his brothers into fighting the Foot. It’s a ‘look, guys, we have to do the right thing here and prevent them from stealing!’ moment. Pizza Puffs: look, guys, you’re going to have to learn to solve problems without me, it’s for your own good! (He knows that’s what needs to happen, even though he’s at war inside over it).
Raph says: what’s the responsible thing to do? And he’s trying to get his brothers to understand this as well (Pizza Puffs).
Raph Relationships:
Donnie: despite the lack of a full Donnie & Raph episode, they have a few surprising things in common. They each have an episode where they want their brothers to learn something. Donnie, in Mind Meld, wants his brothers to be smarter and plan ahead. Raph, in Pizza Puffs, wants his brothers to use some common sense and be a little more responsible. They both like finding solutions to problems, just one focuses on technical and one focuses on interpersonal problems. Mostly (for right now, though) Raph can be blunt with Donnie. He’ll slap the genius in the face with reality. “Donnie! The mech is REAL!” (The Purple Game). “Donnie, I know you know how to say it. We’re all on to you.” (Air Turtle). This is one turtle with whom he can put his foot down and say ‘hey! Back to Earth, now!’ (I can also see them collectively sharing facepalm moments in the future).
Leo: there are times when Leo’s need to be the best and stand-out attitude clash with Raph’s focus on teamwork (Air Turtle, for example “take your win-at-all-costs attitude somewhere else, Leo, we need to work as a team!”) but they do get to a point where both of their strengths in the group strengthen each other, like how iron sharpens iron. Raph wants everyone to work together as a team, but Leo sees their individual strengths. Without that, we get Raph’s glueball disaster in Stuck On You, but together, we have their greatest moment in Many Unhappy Returns. Leo points out the parts each member have to play, and Raph puts it all together in one big plan to defeat the Shredder. “Trust me, bro.” “I do.” (I’m really excited to see where the show goes with this).
Mikey: the main Mikey & Raph episode right now actually seems to be Repairin’ the Baron, and there’s an interesting clash going on here. Raph believes and supports his system, his family. Draxum has been the mortal enemy of the Mad Dogs and deserves to be smashed. However, Mikey is adopting him into the family. Raph is not immediately okay with this, he has a hard time trying to change his inner world. But he cares about Mikey. As he tells Draxum “I’m still trying to get used to this, but Mikey thinks you’re part of the family. And the number rule of the Mad Dogs is: you always take care of family!” They’re actually very complementary, as Mikey can step in in emotionally charged situations where Raph can’t, and how his adaptability gets through Raph’s need for stability. (It will be interesting to see what Raph does as Mikey grows up).
Ultimately, I’m excited to see Raph grow as he figures out the best way to guide this team and save the world. Home is where the heart is, and he’s got a big enough heart to be the home for a lot of people.
So that’s my (unbelievably cut-down) analysis of Rottmnt Raph! I’m going to save the relationships with April and Splinter for later, since this is already too long. Here are the links to learn more about the ISFJ and counterphobic 6w5 if you’re interested:
https://www.16personalities.com/isfj-personality
https://www.enneagraminstitute.com/type-6
https://enneagrampaths.com/2018/04/09/im-afraid-im-going-to-punch-you-discussions-about-the-phobic-and-counter-phobic-enneagram-type-six/
https://www.crystalknows.com/enneagram/type-6-wing-5
https://thoughtcatalog.com/heidi-priebe/2016/01/mbti-and-the-enneagram-2/10/
#rottmnt#rise of the teenage mutant ninja turtles#raphael#tmnt raphael#raph#analysis#tmnt 2k18#personality#essay#i spent way too much time on this#mbti#myers briggs#enneagram#isfj personality#isfj#type 6#cp6#6w5#cp6w5#teenage mutant ninja turtles
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Pick Me Up Playlist
@jellymadebutler I know you said you’re not feeling your best so here’s a “Pick Me up Playlist” for ya or for anyone needs it!
(Markiplier)
Try Not To Laugh Challenge: This is actually backwards! It goes from 23-1 but it’s still a nice Playlist to watch!
Markiplier Makes: This is the whole Playlist of the infamous Markiplier Makes Videos! It’s really funny!
Among Us: Among Us is a new game that’s out there on Steam. You’re either a Crewmate going trying to do tasks to keep the ship going until you reach your destination or the you’re the Imposter! What happens when you get a bunch of YouTubers together for a classic Whodunnit? Chaos and hilarity in sue!
Minecraft: I’m not big into Minecraft but it is very funny seeing Mark and Sean play this and see what they come up with!
I Am Bread: This is a rage game just letting you know ahead of time! But it is funny seeing Mark rage out of the game! But like I said this is a rage game so there is some yelling/screaming in it!
Getting Over It: This another rage game! It is quite funny but like I said it is a Rage Game so there is screaming and yelling involved!
Pogo Stuck: This is a somewhat kind of rage game! It first starts out with Bob, Wade, and Mark playing it. But then Mark starts playing it by himself and yes there is some yelling and screaming in the videos so fair warning!
Uno: This is quite a hilarious game series! It’s Mark and his friends playing the online game of Uno!
Monopoly: This a goo game series and is quite hilarious! It’s Mark, Bob and Wade and there is one where Lixian joins! It really funny and think you might enjoy it!
(JackSepticeye)
Undertale: The best way to start you off with JackSepticeye is one of his most famous series of all time, Undertale! Undertale is about a human that falls in the Monster World and go about it learning the Monster World while trying to get home! It’s a text based game and Jack does the voices for the characters!
Deltarune: The Sequel to Undertale! Or that’s what everyone seems to be calling it! I haven’t had the chance to watch the series but I’ve heard it’s really good!
Slime Rancher: Literally you are a Rancher raising all kinds of different slimes! It’s really cute and funny!
Cuphead: This is a very old school cartoon like style game. There is some violence in it but it’s mild and no more then what actual cartoons, like Tom and Jerry and the Animatics.
Bendy and the Inc Machine: This is a horror game but it’s not the scary! There are some jump scares but it’s more like FNAF kind of jump scare. So, it will be scare ya but not that much. It’s like a cartoon horror game. Again some violence in the game but it’s mild. This also kinda of spawn the idea of the JSE Fan Made Ego Shawn Flynn! Jack has a cameo in the game!
Animal Crossing: Nice little story driven game that Jack plays on his switch. It’s very cute and it’s a nice little game to series to watch!
Spiderman: Jack finally gets to play as his all time favorite Super Hero from his childhood! Spiderman!
Spiderman Miles Morales: The next gen starts now! With the new Spiderman! This game is based of the movie Spiderman into the Spider verse and I can’t wait to watch it and watch this series of Jack’s!
Spyro 3: Remake: This is a cute series of the game Spyro 3 redone for the PS3! It’s super cute and a lot of fun! I think you might enjoy this one!
Minecraft: Like I said, I’m not into Minecraft but this is a nice and cute series that Jack has! Filled with a lot of Adventure and some scary events!
Meme Time!: A cute series that Jack started where he goes on his Subreddit and looks at some of our Memes that we did!
Luigi’s Mason 3: I can’t make a playlist for someone to watch and not include this! This is so cute and wholesome! It’s all from Luigi’s point of view and how he’s going to try and stop the Ghost King and save his brother and friends!
Among Us: I have to include Jack’s! This is so funny with Jack and his friends! I think you might enjoy this!
(CrankGamePlays)
Pokémon: I haven’t watched this series yet, but I’ve heard great things about it!
Papers Please: This is very hilarious! I’ve seen a couple of episodes and I think you might like it!
Animal Crossing: I did enjoy watching Ethan play this! It’s really funny and wholesome and I think you might enjoy it!
Slime Rancher: I have to include this! I watched this when I was feeling a little down during Quarantine. It’s really funny!
(DolphinTreasureArt)
This a YouTuber that I found when I went browsing for Markiplier and JackSepticeye fan-made games! DolphinTreasureArt plays fan-made games and indie games on her channel. Along with some Cosplays and Artwork that she has done. Some of her Fanart has gotten in a couple of fan games!
Septiscape: First off, this series is near and dear to my heart! This is the first ever series that watched back in 2k18 when I first found Erin’s Channel! This helped me get over my writers block and led to me to writing my first fanfic that I wrote in over a year! This one is an older version but I still love it!
Jack finds himself trapped in his own mind, the Mindscape and is trying to find his way home! Along the way he finds out the Egos that he created are more then just Egos! But at the same time, some sort of Corruption and happening with Jack’s mind and many of the Ego’s Worlds is collapsing!
Septiscape: Livestream #HopeFromHome: This is the livestream of the updated version of the game! It’s about 8 hours long but you can skip some parts, especially since some of the fights can be a bit repetive but I wanted to include this one!
Soulscape: I can’t put in Septiscape and not give you the sequel as well! This is the well awaited sequel to Septiscape! After the adventures of the first game, the Egos go and try to enjoy a nice little R&R only for someone to stalking Anti and trying to take his soul pieces back! Join Anti and the Egos as they try to figure out what it going on and help save Anti before it’s too late! And there is really cool plot twist!
Hearts and Heroes: This is another one that is near and dear to my heart! I will also link Mark’s playthrough as well! Hearts and Heroes and about you the fans of Markiplier and the journey that the fans go through trying to help save people from the Monsters the haunt their dreams and to help save Mark from his worst Nightmare. Markiplier’s Playthrough here.
Septiclands: A JackSepticeye Fan Game: This is very funny series that DolphinTreasureArt has done! It’s silly and goofy and it has a very weird plot but it’s absolutely one of my favorites! It’s also on her longest series as well!
The Boss: A JackSepticeye Fan Game: Just like Heats and Heroes is near and dear to me heart so is this game! I’ll leave a link to Jack’s Playthrough as well! This is near and dear to my heart b/c it’s the first JackSepticeye Fan Game that I came across. It was on Jack’s Channel that first saw it and then I watched Erin’s. This is nice little RPG Game, but it’s about Jack being sucked into his computer and has to try and find his way home! On the way he finds out that there is two subscribers that lost in his computer and there is a major twist at the end!
The Boss Is Nothing: His Side of the Story: I don’t want to give away what happens in the Boss! So, this the other side of the story of The Boss! In the Boss, Jack comes across someone he never thought he would, so now we’re getting his side of the story and why did what he did to Jack!
Glitch in the System: Chapter 1: This is a very special game! It’s the sequel to The Boss! The developers over at Sarcastic Pasta Games is working hard to get chapter two out! Chapter one is really good and you get see Erin do some Cosplay along with some voice acting for the characters/Egos!
Septic Storm: This is a cute little fan game that’s a bit old, but it’s a very cute RPG Game! Join, Jack, Mark and Felix as they battle Billy to end this battle once and for all! Only to find out that Billy isn’t the one that truly is behind this, but someone else entirely!
CrankGamePlays Fan Game: The Crank Chronicles: This is a RPG Fan Game of one Ethan Nester CrankGamePlays! Ethan has find himself in a distant land thanks to the help of a powerful Sorceress! But an evil threatens the land! With help of his two best friends Mark and Tyler, Ethan goes on a quest to help save this land and find his way home! I don’t if the developer ever did the sequel to the this game or not but it’s not a bad game!
#markiplier#jacksepticeye#crankgameplays#dolphintreasureart#jellymadebutter#here's a nice list of playthroughs for ya!#i hope you feel better#and my inbox is always open if you need and/or want talk!
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Loving You’s the Antidote: Chapter Six
MASTERLIST
MOODBOARD // PREV/IEW(S) // TAG LIST // TAGS // PLAYLIST
TAG LIST: @ihearthemcallingforyou, @cock-a-doodely-doo
WARNING: CHAPTER INCLUDES SEXUAL CONTENT.
talk to me about it! feedback is greatly appreciated!
Sunday Dinner.
One day a week that was designated for the family to gather around – especially now that two out of three of the children have left the nest – and have a nice, home-cooked dinner and dessert and a film that everyone has seen one too many times.
Mom and Dad’s house never changed. Always the same tinted beige on the siding, a gentle baby blue shutter outside every window, the colourful florals filling the boxes on the top floor. Dad wanted the Southern Charm. Mom wanted a taste of Paris. They settled on something near California twang. On the interior, Mom made home. All of the walls decorated with family portraits and your paintings and the photographs that Grandma gave her on her very last visit. All of it – the cracks in the wood, the chips in the paint, crooked frames – was home.
Dad and Brandon are in the living room, Mom outside tending to the garden of vegetables that would begin blooming in the near future, Phoebe in her bedroom talking about something One Direction-related obnoxiously.
Hiding Harry – and the relationship she has with him – away from Phoebe might be the hardest part.
“Hello, hello,” Mom quips as Amelie walks inside, toeing her shoes at the carpet and laying her bag on the makeshift table, the golden trotting to her side to greet her. “Dad’s in the living room with B. Phoebe is upstairs. Have everything almost done!”
Mom is clad in her favourite Sunday Outfit – the necessarily painted jeans, a white blouse, and her favourite slippers that she purchases from a tiny shop in the outskirts of Paris every time she visits home. Her hair is greying ginger, and although she loves it, she refuses to colour it. Makes me feel wise, sweetheart.
“Mama,” Amelie says hesitantly, kissing her cheek, sitting on the chipping barstools – her idea was that every year her children would repaint their barstool, and eventually all the paint would become an eclectic memory – and taking a sliver of the tomato chopped on the cutting board, “j'ai besoin de votre aide pour quelque chose.”
Mama, I need your help with something.
Mom sets the knife down, her palms flat on the counter, her light green eyes staring into her daughter’s. “Qu'est-ce qui ne va pas?”
“Know how I told you that I started seeing someone,” Amelie begins, her heart pounding in her chest, her cheeks flushed with her anxiety and the anticipation. “He’s in Melbourne, right now. He’ll be there for Valentine’s Day.”
“Okay,” Mom urges, her attention moving to the exaggerated shouting in the living room from her husband and eldest.
“I,” she stutters, her palms sweaty and sticking to her jeans, her tongue wetting her chapped lips, “I think I want to go see him.”
“Chéri,” Mom coos, walking around the counter and settling on the stool nearest to her, taking her hands in hers and drawing circles with her thumbs, “qui est ce garçon?”
“His name is Harry,” she murmurs, laying her phone on the counter and showing her their favourite picture from his birthday a week earlier. “He’s on tour.”
Mom’s eyes are wide, fully aware of who Harry is. Her mouth is slightly agape, her hand covering her parted lips as she stares at the picture – Harry kissing Amelie’s cheek, his arms wrapped around her waist, her hands covering her eyes. Her cheeks shade a light pink, her sigh sounding in a tone of awe.
“That’s the Harry from Phoebe’s band, yeah? One Direction,” Mom says quietly, her voice barely above a whisper, ensuring that her youngest wouldn’t hear and interrupt the conversation. “Comment as-tu réussi ce coup, mon amour?”
“No idea, Mama,” she sighs, a smile tugging at her lips as his contact swipes across the screen with a message. “He’s so good to me.”
Good morning, doll. Have fun at family dinner. Call me when you’re home. x
“You love Harry,” Mom smiles, kissing her hair sweetly, standing from the crooked stool and reaching for her laptop, opening the screen and gathering all the information for a flight. “Nona did this for me, especially when Dad flew to North Carolina for that film. Great Grandma did that Nona when she wanted to take the train to Papa in Paris for the weekend.”
“Didn’t know that Nona took a train to Paris for Papa,” Amelie murmurs, typing in the information for the airport that Glenne had given her the day before. “You flew to North Carolina for Dad.”
“Il faut savoir ce que tu veux et aller le chercher, chérie.” Mom pokes her head into the living room, Dad grinning ear to ear to see her, Brandon waving towards her as Daisy nudges at his hand to pet her. “En utilisant la carte de crédit, mon amour.”
“Okay,” Dad hums, standing to give her a kiss. “Guessing by how quiet you are, I shouldn’t say anything to Phoebe or B.”
“Our secret,” Mom smirks, kissing his cheek sweetly. “Doing what Mama asked us to do like they did for us. Giving her a chance.”
“Good.” Dad squeezes her into a hug, Mom melting into him. “Hi, honeybee.”
“Hi, Dad.”
“Oh mon Dieu,” Mom squeaks, rushing to the stove and quieting the heat, ensuring that the meal wouldn’t burn. “All the time.”
“J'ai failli brûler sa cuisine la semaine dernière,” she giggles, shaking your head at the memory. “Not fully burnt down, but I definitely burnt our chicken and ordered us pizza, instead.”
“Happens to the best, and worst, of us.”
“No longer allowed in his kitchen unless I’m supervised,” she laughs, her attention turning to the doorway where her youngest sister stood with her arms crossed and a scowl on her face. “Oh, what’s wrong, Pheebs? You look like someone told you a concert got cancelled.”
“Have a show on Valentine’s Day and Cassie was supposed to livestream and apparently the internet in the arena is being worked on,” Phoebe sighs, hugging her momentarily and settling onto the stool beside her, her eyes squinting suspiciously as she closes her phone and lays it beneath her thigh. “Cancelled going to a party so I could watch with Cass.”
“Can’t you still go to the party? Not like you were uninvited,” she reasons, her heart beginning to beat heavily in her chest with anxiety.
Does Phoebe know already?
“Guess so,” she sighs frustratedly, shaking her head and heaving a breath with annoyance. “I’ll probably stay home and wait for updates, anyways.”
Mom’s eyes meet hers, Have you told her?
Of course not, she mouths, forcing a smile as her younger sister takes the cutlery and sets it along the table.
“God, you’ve gotten weirder since you turned twenty.”
Have to tell her soon, Mom whispers, kissing Phoebe’s hair as she takes the decorated plates and begins laying each on their designated mat – the ones that we painted every year that we needed a new change in the kitchen aura – to accompany the meal.
Know that and I will, she swears, her eyes meeting her younger sister and opening her arms for a hug, smiling as she stalks towards her with a pout on her lips. “I’m sure someone will livestream the show, Pheebs.”
“I’m just annoyed,” she grumbles, leaning her cheek on her sister’s shoulder and having her arms hang loosely around her torso. “Can I be an adult already and get to travel to see all of my favourite shows whenever I want, already?”
“Don’t think that’s how it works,” Amelie hums, stifling her laughter against her hand, her lips tucking into her mouth to mask your smile.
“Harry would probably pay for his girlfriend’s flight to visit him. Niall, too,” she groans. “That is such an unfair thing. There is someone out there that gets to love Harry Styles.”
Oh my god. Oh my god. Oh my god.
“Enough with the impending doom until after supper, Phoebe,” Mom muses, shaking her head and walking into the living room to tell Dad and B. Her wink towards her telling her that she could see the anxiety on her face, encouraging her to relax.
Having – more or less – hippies as a mother and father, Family Dinner is certainly something other than functional and orderly.
Mom talks about the novel she sent to the editor earlier in the week, one more approval needed to finalise one section of the publication contract. Dad mentions in passing that he has to be at a film set early in the morning for the promotional campaign shoot. Heads turn as Brandon brings up asking Autumn – his girlfriend since the age of thirteen – to marry him. Phoebe complains about not seeing Harry and Niall as soon as she wanted. Congratulations ensued as Amelie mentions that the mural at the bakery is complete and perfected.
I’ll take you to the airport, Mom whispers as Amelie hugs her goodbye. Her petite body wraps tightly around hers, squeezing her tightly. You should tell Phoebe before someone else tells her.
Calling Harry on her way home, her mind is racing with all that her mother said, all that her sister said, all that she has to be done before she leaves in a mere three days.
Harry talks quietly in the background as she readies herself for the night, her hair strung in a towel and one of the band’s tour shirts clinging to her damp skin, her lips coated with her – and his – favourite chapstick. He mentions the flowers that are outside his hotel, how the season is so much brighter than London. He asks about Mom and Dad, Phoebe and Brandon. One day I’ll bring you out here, Harry says.
All that replays in her mind is her mother’s words, and the flight confirmation sitting in her email.
Have to know what you want and get it, honey.
/ / /
“Welcome to Melbourne,” the flight attendant announces on the speaker, the lights slowly beginning to brighten and wake the sleeping guests scattered about the plane. Amelie’s carry on is tucked in the overhead bin, an older gentleman offering to get it for her as she struggled to reach.
If Harry was here, he’d be making fun of you for being too short.
Amelie sinks into Harry’s sweatshirt, smirking at the fact that her father would be seething with her wearing a Greenbay Packers anything. Her fingers quickly type on the screen, Harry’s name with an accompanying picture at the centre.
Need your hotel and room number, please and thank you. Don’t ask questions.
Harry takes a minute to respond and Amelie can see the expression on his face, the furrowed eyebrows and squinted eyes, his bottom lip pulled between his fingertips.
The Langham, Room 702. I’m about to get in the shower. Should I stay out a bit longer?
Her mouth curves into a smile as she notices a bouquet selection near the exit. Her attention immediately goes to the sunflowers and daisies in the corner, paying and quickly making her way outside to meet the security guard that Niall arranged with her.
Give it like twenty minutes.
His response comes immediately, the suspicion evident in his text. He doesn’t question her, simply responding and taking a seat on the unmade bed. He shuts the water in the shower, heaving a breath and sinking into the mattress, trying to think through everything.
Alright.
Laying there is unbearable, Harry standing up and beginning to pace around his bedroom nervously. He can’t quite grasp the idea of her coming to Melbourne. That would be simply impossible with university and the artwork projects and family dinners.
That would be impossible, wouldn’t it?
Although unlikely, twenty minutes felt like hours. Harry wasn’t a patient person. He became bored easily and the idea of having to wait for something his girlfriend was surprising him with, and being without a single idea, gave him a headache.
His ears perk to the knocking on his suite door, quiet chatter outside, his feet padding against the carpet and his hands yanking a stray shirt over his naked torso. His chest deflates at the sight of Niall holding a bouquet of sunflowers and daisies – certainly from her.
“How–”
“Quite the selection they have at the airport,” Amelie squeaks, laying her miniature knapsack against the wall and smiling, her arms wrapping around his shoulders as his arms circle her waist, squeezing her into him as tightly as physically possible. “Harry, I can’t breathe.”
“Bye, you two,” Niall smirks, handing Harry the bouquet and turning to return to his suite.
Harry chuckles, releasing his grip on her slightly, taking the bouquet from his friend and nudging her bag inside with his foot, his arm continuing to stay wrapped around her and hugging her to his chest. “Sorry, I’ve just missed you.”
“Missed you, too,” she whispers, closing the door behind her, his cheeks taken in her hands, her lips moulding to his and soaking in his kiss, the bouquet set on the nearby table, his fingertips gripping her hips. “Glad you didn’t shower and leave me out there.”
“Would never do that to you,” he smirks, his thumbs tracing her bottom lip, stealing a kiss innocently. “Can’t believe you’re here.”
“One very long flight later,” she smirks, kissing his cheek and jaw sweetly, her arms squeezing him tighter in her embrace. “Good thing I sleep on planes.”
“Forty fucking hours, love,” Harry whispers, gently nudging her cheek, his mouth moulding onto hers and savouring the way she kisses him.
Amelie smiles against his lips, obsessed with the way his reaction made her heart swell against her chest and heat radiate on her skin. “Considering I can wake up with you on Valentine’s Day, it’ll be worth it.”
“Tell me you didn’t bring that knapsack and that’s it.”
“Had to check into m’room and shower, first,” she says, lightly tugging on the curls and kissing the vein in his neck, smiling at his moan as her lips touch the centre and nip at his skin. “All of m’stuff is there.”
“You’re not staying in another room,” Harry breathes shakily, his hands travelling across her hips and squeezing her bum. “You’ll stay with your boyfriend.”
“Know that but I needed to get here without you finding out,” she smirks, a heavy breath leaving her lips as his mouth begins mapping kisses along her neck, biting into the skin and marking her, their bodies walking backwards into the bedroom, his hands gently nudging her against the wall.
“Must’ve cost loads,” Harry mutters, his lips sweetly kissing her jaw. “You’re not allowed to buy another plane ticket to see me. I’ll get it.”
“Can thank Mom for me being here,” Amelie sighs, adoring the feeling of his mouth on her, the way his fingertips dig into her hips, holding her tightly to him. “Bought m’flight and all that. Came from a whole story about women in m’family travelling for their men. Apparently, it’s a thing they do. Take chances on nice guys, and all that.”
“Oh,” Harry smirks cockily at that, his teeth dragging her bottom lip as he kisses her hungrily, the briefs beginning to feel all too tight against his cock and tensing thighs. “’m a nice guy to take a chance on, then?”
“Think so,” Amelie moans, her eyelashes laying against her cheeks, all her thoughts hyper-focused on Harry’s hands trailing beneath her – his – sweatshirt, his thumbs tracing over the curves of her breasts. “Can feel you trying to distract me about the flight.”
“Give up on paying for your next flight,” Harry says sternly, silently praising the way there wasn’t a lacy bralette to get in his way. “Quicker you do that, quicker you’ll have the best shag of your life on that unmade bed, over there.”
“Fine.”
“My sweatshirt, hm?” Harry smirks, gently taking the material and tossing it onto the carpet, the cotton leggings adoring her hips rubbing uncomfortably against his hips. Her lips suck at the skin on his collarbone, the skin bright red and adorning a temporary mark.
“You left it,” Amelie mutters against him. Her thighs tense at the feeling of his fingertips ghosting across the lace waistband of her panties, his thumbs tucked into the material and dragging it slightly. “Harry.”
“Did it on purpose.” Harry nudges Amelie against the mattress, her cheeks flushing as his eyes travel along her body, taking in every inch of her figure, the curves and the tattoos and the lines that make her. “Up,” he murmurs, smiling as she lifts her hips and her panties accompany the clothing on the ground.
Harry kisses her inner thighs sweetly, coaxing her to relax with his touch. He gently massages her hips, smiling against her skin as she breathes out an airy moan, her fingertips curling through his hair, his arms tucked under her bum to have her core meet his mouth. He lays his tongue against her heat, savouring the way she tastes so sweet, his lips suckling on her clit the way she loves.
Amelie’s moans spur him further, the moans vibrating against her making the orgasm overwhelm her senses. His fingertips tease her heat, gently inching into her and curling against the velvet walls that squeeze him, the sucking against the nerves between her thighs having her chase her orgasm with white vision and moans.
His tongue continues to lay on her heat, taking her orgasm and humming with the taste, his fingertips between his lips to have all of her. His smirk is enough to make her squeeze her thighs together, the way he is so happy to please her making her want to have him again and again and again. He sponges kisses along her inked thighs and belly, teasingly biting her nipples as his mouth works his way back to hers.
“Get on the bed,” Amelie tells him, her jaw clenched as Harry smirks and tosses the remaining clothes on his torso. “Don’t smirk at me like that.”
“Not doing anything,” Harry smirks, his cheeks tinging pink as Amelie manoeuvres around him and settles between his thighs. “Gon’a kill me looking at me like that.”
Her fingertips ghost across his thighs, her lips touching his skin, smirking against him as his hand gently takes her hair away from her face. Her tongue wets her skin, her hand gently wrapping around his cock, her thumb spreading the arousal around his shaft, his breathy moans echoing around her.
Amelie slowly eases over him, hollowing her cheeks and sucking, her tongue swirling around his throbbing tip the way he loves, her hand pumping all that she couldn’t take. Her fingertips squeeze his hip, his arousal and orgasm beginning to taste on her tongue.
“God, this is so much better than me trying to pretend it’s you,” Harry moans, his head rolling onto the pillow as her innocent eyes meet his.
“Oh, baby, you think about me,” Amelie hums, the vibrations making his hips ache and thrust into her mouth.
Harry groans as she takes all of him, his cock hitting her throat and her tongue taking his arousal. “Certainly, don’t think about m’hand.” His orgasm is reaching him quickly, his panting rapid and causing his chest to heave. “Need to be in you, doll.”
Amelie smirks, kissing the inked thigh and laying her lips across his heated skin. Harry squeezes her hips above his waist, making her pause, her breathing shaky as she realises what he’s implying. “Are you sure? Don’t wan’a hurt you.”
“Love, I promise you won’t,” Harry says shakily, moving beneath her and laying his back against the wooden headboard, his lip taken between his teeth as she gently settles on his thighs. “Go slow, I’ve got you.”
Amelie nods nervously, smiling shyly as Harry squeezes her thigh encouragingly. His hands hold her hips, coaxing her forward slightly, his cock hard and throbbing against her heat. He nudges her to lean onto her knees, his skin prickling with bumps as he gently eases into her, her warmth surrounding his shaft and squeezing him in her velvet walls.
Amelie intertwines her fingers with his, her pelvis rolling and grinding, his knees tucked behind her, his hips thrusting to meet her. Her mouth parts with her moans, the friction against the nerves between her thighs making her legs shake. Harry leans forward, his lips sponging kisses along her jaw, suckling a mark on her chest. His hands take her hips, smiling as her arms circle around his shoulders, her nails digging into his skin. His thrusts meet a rhythm with the way her hips beginning rotating, a heavy moan leaving his throat as she squeezes him, easing him out inch by inch.
“Want you deeper,” Amelie moans, meeting his mouth with a chaste kiss, his knees parting her thighs, his figure laying over hers.
Harry sinks into her, her warmth soaking him in, squeezing him tightly. He kisses her jaw, her thighs wrapped around his waist, his cock bottoming out and reaching her hit with every thrust. His orgasm is heating in his stomach, sweat sticking the curls to his forehead, her moans in his ear making him want to bust. Her thighs squeeze around his hips, holding him in her, her climax warm and milking around him. His orgasm spills inside her, his panting hot against her neck. His mouth breaks into a smile as her hands take his cheeks and her lips kiss his sweetly, her ankles slowly unlocking around his bum and laying lazily on the bed.
“Good, you’re so good,” Harry hums, gently sliding out and lying beside her. His arm slings over her waist, pulling her into his chest, his cheek laying against her shoulder. “Have you spoken to your mum since you got here?”
“Oh fuck,” Amelie swears, snagging her sweatshirt and tugging it over her torso, pulling her phone out and sending messages to her mother and best friend. “Done.”
“Care to leave the pants off for the evening,” Harry winks, laughing loudly as Amelie rolls her eyes at him. He takes his phone, smirking and beginning to type against his screen, hiding the phone away from her obnoxiously.
Laying her head on his chest, she presses a kiss to the butterfly adorning his abdomen, her cheek resting on her forearms. “What are you doing?”
“Making a list of all the places I want to shag you in.”
“God, you’re annoying.”
“That wasn’t telling me to quit.” Harry grabs her cheeks and kisses her, smirking at the way her lips perfectly adorn his at every angle. “Got to check off Aus, thank you for that.”
Amelie hides her face in her hands, trying to mask the smile that is etched into her features. Only a few weeks ago she was telling him that she couldn’t understand why he stared at her in such a way, and now she can feel herself doing the same. “Have any plans for Valentine’s Day, Mr Styles?”
“Considering m’girlfriend is here,” he hums, carding his fingers through her hair and delicately brushing the stray hairs away from her forehead, her fringe freshly cut and swaying beneath her eyebrows, her lips tinted red with the kisses. “Have a few thoughts in mind.”
“Dirty thoughts, I’m assuming.”
“Could be,” he drawls teasingly, his eyes narrowing at her as she pinches his hip. “Have a show on Valentine’s Day, so could we makeshift tomorrow to be our Valentine’s Day? Have breakfast and an early swim, avoid all the crowds. Only us.” His eyes brighten with her smile. Harry loves seeing Amelie happy. “Can plan something special for dinner, later on.”
“Good thing I brought something nice to wear," Amelie smiles, heaving a sigh as she straddles Harry’s thighs and slips off the bed, giggling at his groans and complaint of her leaving. “Have a dress for tomorrow.”
“Ooh,” Harry hums, following her into the bathroom and leaning against the wall, admiring away she mills about the space, gathering her toiletries and pyjamas for the night. “Haven’t seen you in a dress before.”
“Only on special occasions.”
“Love that you consider me a special occasion,” he says, walking towards her as she turns the water on in the porcelain bath, testing the temperature with her fingers. He wraps his arms around her waist, kissing the sweet spot at the nape of her neck, smirking against her skin as she shivers. “What are you doing?”
“Need a bath, I’m sticky.” Her words spew out without thinking and her eyes roll as soon as she feels Harry’s smirk against her skin. “Harry, don’t you dare say something.”
“Didn’t say a word, doll.” He kisses her shoulder, releasing her from his grasp and walking to the shower, the water sputtering against the glass. “Want to take a shower with me? Warm in there.”
“Having you as a distraction in there? No thank you.”
“And you think I won’t distract you in the bathtub,” Harry scoffs, shaking his head and clicking his tongue, walking to the tub and turning off the faucet, taking her hand in his and smirking as she reluctantly walks with him. “Think very highly of me, love.”
“Hope to have a minute of peace, in here, that’s all,” Amelie moans, her eyelashes fluttering against her cheeks as he kisses her cheek, patting her bum to get into the shower.
“Not gon’a happen,” he chuckles, shutting the door as he steps inside. He smiles widely, taking in the way the water falls over her and her fringe clings to her forehead. They’ve not showered together before, only staying in the bathroom while the other bathed, and there was something intimate about the experience and the way Amelie trusts him enough to do so. “Did you have a nice flight, at least? Layover somewhere, I’m assuming,” he says, taking the shampoo and squirting the liquid into her hand.
“Mhm,” she hums, lathering her hair and soaking in the warmth around them. Harry is the first man she’s ever showered with, and the thought about how much she truly trusted him made her anxiety heighten. Begging her brain to quiet down, she asks the thoughts to leave her alone and have her enjoy the moment. “Slept everywhere I could.”
“Knowing you,” Harry winks, nudging Amelie’s hip and rinsing the soap smoothly, his eyes drifting across her body as her sponge coats her skin with bubbles, “that sounds about right.”
“Brought a bathing suit with me,” Amelie mutters, playfully pushing his chest to move under the water. “Only go to the beach a few times a year so you better take your opportunity to see me in a swimsuit and run with it.”
“Happily.” He kisses her cheek, stepping out of the shower and wrapping a towel around his waist, grabbing a new one for her from the stack near the sink. He admires her as she wraps the cotton around her figure, her hair clinging to her skin, her face slightly flushed from the heat. He tugs her into a hug, smiling as she wraps her arms around him. He’s learnt that she loves the unexpected hugs, the affection that is genuine and means something to the other person. His nose smells her hair, the scent that he could only describe as her lingering in the air. “Ooh, you smell good.”
“Compliment central, over here,” she smirks, kissing his shoulder and squeezing his hips. Amelie presses her lips to his cheeks to compensate for the lack of touch, his lips pouting as she shuffles into the bedroom to grab the sweatshirt and panties from her knapsack, her towel strung around her hair to dry.
“Can’t help a crush, love,” Harry says, yanking a pair of sweatpants up his legs, the waistband low on his hips and displaying the ferns that she loved to trace. “Huge one at that, doll.”
“Hm,” Amelie hums, taking her hairbrush out and beginning to comb through the ends. “You’re staring.”
“Le’ me brush your hair,” he says, coaxing the brush and nodding towards the mattress with messy sheets and a duvet. They couldn’t be bothered to make a mess beneath the comforter, too caught up in the moment. He smiles at her, taking in the way she situates herself between his thighs as he centres himself on the bed. “I’ll be gentle.”
“Okay,” she agrees, tilting her head back and smiling, her heart swelling in her chest as he gently kisses her lips, her nose, her forehead. “Hi.”
“Hi, love.” Harry turns on the television, delicately combing through her wet hair and soaking in the simplicity and intimacy of the moment. He never envisioned himself the kind to desire the moments like these, the ones that were simply him and the one he adores – loves – taking in the silence around them. “You look beautiful.”
“Currently in pyjamas,” Amelie says, shocked in the way that Harry could be so easily impressed by the simplest of things.
“Okay, and,” he says, setting the hairbrush on the bedside table and running his fingers through her hair, smirking as he notices her closed eyes and parted lips. He kisses her cheek, his thumb drawing a line along her jaw. “Don’t nod off when ’m talking to you, you cheeky thing. You’re gon’a kill m’ego."
Amelie squeezes his knee, barely opening her eyes to meet his stare. The way Harry looks at her makes her want to melt. No one has ever looked at her like that. “Your voice is soothing; I like listening to you.”
“Can read to you if you wanted,” Harry offers, moving his arm to have her manoeuvre onto her side, her hair tucked into the hood of the sweatshirt as she shares his pillow. Amelie isn’t a fan of cuddling at night, especially when she’s feeling far away, but she never strays too far. “’m halfway through your book.”
“Are you? How are you feeling about it?” she wonders curiously, her voice quieting as she begins to drift to sleep. “Careful, this is my favourite book you’re about to bash.”
“Like it,” Harry assures her. “Quite fitting with your fucked-up romance theme you go for.” He chuckles quietly as her chest heaves with heavy breaths. “Are you going to fall asleep while I read to you?”
“Most likely,” Amelie murmurs, taking his hand and squeezing it, kissing his palm sweetly before letting go, her hands tucking under her cheek as she snuggles beneath the duvet. “Goodnight, baby.”
“Night, love.”
Harry opens the novel besides the bed, the cracked spine folding beneath his fingertips. He opens to the bookmarked page, smiling as a highlighted quote catches his eye.
“And then she kisses me. It's the kind of kiss that makes me lose track of everything, and so it may take hours or minutes by the time we break apart.”
~
Harry admires the waves crashing ashore, the sun shining brightly in the sky, the golden hue tanning their skin as they lay peacefully and privately on their towels. He found the perfect spot – so he believes – away from the suspecting and invading eye, secluded and private to allow them to simply be alone. Amelie lays beside him, her sunglasses tucked on her nose, her cheek resting on her forearms as she stares at him, taking in the olive tone and tinted tattoos.
“Could you put more sunscreen on me, baby?” Amelie questions, handing him the bottle and smiling as the top clicks open.
“Mhm,” Harry hums, squirting the cream in his hands and beginning to rub it into her skin. His hands go beneath the band, his fingers searching for a clasp to unhook. “Can’t unclasp the top, love.”
“Not meant to,” she smirks, shaking her head and clicking her tongue disapprovingly as his bottom lip juts into a pout. “Know you, Styles. Knew what you were going to do.”
“I am insulted, love.” His voice feigns his innocence, the glimmer in his clearly displaying his true intentions. “How dare you think so lowly of me!”
“Mhm,” Amelie muses, playfully smacking his thigh as his hands travel closer to her bum. “Hands above the waist in public.”
“Have to ruin our makeshift Valentine’s Day, huh.”
“You got laid two hours ago! How am I ruining Valentine’s Day?”
“Wan’a see your boobies,” Harry mutters, gently tugging at the edge of the bathing suit, his lips tucked together to stifle the laughter.
“Harry, boobies, really?” Amelie groans, nudging his hand away from her chest, rotating her head slightly to stare at him. “Are you thirteen?”
“Find that saying, ‘wan’a see your tits’ is quite crude to your girlfriend, so,” he muses, smacking her bum playfully as he stands on his feet, his toes tucked in the sand, his hair shaking out on her freshly coated skin. “Okay, I’m going for a swim. Have fun without me.”
“You’re unbearable,” she grumbles, trying to hide her smirk through a bitten lip, her heart sinking as he begins to walk away. “Wait.”
“Hm,” Harry hums, turning around and walking back to her, leaning down to meet her.
“Kiss?”
“Always,” he smiles, kissing her lightly, her strawberry chapstick lingering on his skin.
She admires him as he treads into the water, the clarity of the water exhibiting the tattoos that marked his skin, the way his eyes reflected through the sun. Her forehead lines with sweat, her body begging to have the relief of the cool water around her. She hesitates though, the idea of showing her body so freely intimidating and making her question her apparel choice. Harry looks perfect in the infamous yellow trunks, the colour bright on his skin and simply great on him.
Her eyes couldn’t leave him.
“Come in here, Ames,” Harry calls, his eyes travelling around the area to make sure attention wasn’t called on them. He didn’t want her to be intimidated by a crowd and the rumours and headlines that were bound to come about. He lowers his voice, his words only travelling to where she could hear. “Water is so lovely.”
“Fine, fine,” Amelie concedes, standing up and beginning to walk towards the water, shaking her head and hiding her face in her hands as he whistles. He would never whistle at a woman; however, it was apparent that her confidence was weary. He would do anything to make her feel like the most confident woman. “Ames, hm.”
“Ames,” he says confidently, taking her hand and bringing her to him, her arms wrapping around his shoulders, his hands holding her waist tightly. “You like it?”
“Never had a nickname before,” she mentions, pursing her lips as she traces through her memories and searching for anything that her family or friends might have called her beyond her name. “Only nicknames m’family has given me are honeybee and chéri.”
“Honeybee for the flowers, right?” Harry asks this for confirmation, the way he pays attention to every detail Amelie tells him, butterflies swirling in her belly at the thought. “And the other.”
“Chéri means honey or darling,” Amelie tells him, her accent rhythmic as the words roll off her tongue. “Mom likes using names like that.”
“Cute,” he smiles, kissing her cheek and hugging her tighter to his chest, waves lightly crashing into their backs, barely reaching his hips. “Happy you’re here, doll.”
“Me too.”
Harry presses his lips to Amelie’s, smiling as her arms hug tighter around his shoulders. He is grateful for the privacy, wanting to show her that she deserves to have someone that loves on her around anyone. He is nervous though, he would have to admit; media can be absolutely brutal, and the last thing he would want is to have someone hurt her through a lousy magazine or social media posting. He cherishes the kiss, the easiest affection. He could kiss her for hours.
“You seem to really love it here,” Amelie says, kissing his cheek, her legs quickly moving to her chest as a jellyfish moves past them. Harry gently grabs her thighs, trying to coax her into circling around him completely. “Harry.”
“Hm,” Harry sighs, his thumbs gently rubbing her skin as he awaits her answer – although he is sure he already knows.
“Don’t.” Her voice is quiet as she shakes her in disapproval, her eyes scanning beneath them for the fish, her legs slowly slinking towards the sand. “’m too heavy.”
“Says who?” he wonders, his voice slightly exasperated and confused. He is angry, frustrated with whoever would tell her such a thing, make her believe that there is something about her that would make her not fit enough for affection. “Doll, who said that? They’re wrong.”
“I –” Her voice cracks and Harry knows exactly who’s done this. He would do anything to have a talk with Jack, to really get inside the boy’s head and see how anyone could treat another human this way, especially one that deserves nothing but love.
“Hey, you don’t need to think about that with me.”
Let me love you, please.
“Harry, I’m trusting you,” Amelie breathes, taking a deep breath and releasing the tension in her muscles, allowing Harry to coax her thighs around his waist, his arms tucked under her bum and holding her to him. He kisses her cheek a smile on his lips as she begins to relax.
“Appreciate that more than you know,” Harry says, his lips delicate on her skin. “I’ve got you. Always do.”
In that very moment, Amelie chooses to believe him.
~
Amelie paces around the bedroom, her suitcase strewn across the lounger, her outfit for the evening set out neatly on the made bed. Her anxiety is echoing in her brain, her heart pounding heavily against her ribcage, her jaw tense as she stares at the multiple ignored calls with her sister. Harry is partially undressed, getting ready to shower, leaning uselessly on the mattress. He absolutely hates seeing her this way. He would love to take the stress and negative thoughts away.
He sighs, walking over to her and gently grabbing her shoulders, his hands cupping her cheeks and making her meet his stare, his lips touching her forehead to calm her. “Don’t worry, love,” Harry says softly, trying his best to calm her. “Aren’t Phoebe’s friends coming to the show, tomorrow? Maybe they’re all talking.”
“Guess so,” Amelie sighs, leaning into his chest, his arms embracing her. He taps her spine lightly, nodding to the vibrating phone set on the dresser behind them. “Maybe that’s her.”
“I’ll leave you to it.”
Quickly taking her phone, she sighs heavily, sliding her thumb across the screen and waiting to have the video connect to speak. “Hey, Phoebe.”
Hi, Phoebe, Harry whispers, nodding towards the shower and walking into the bathroom, quietly shutting the door behind him and turning on the vent, the water sputtering on and hitting the tiles.
“Hey,” Phoebe murmurs, her lips pursed together, her cheek leaning against her fist.
“Are you alright? You’ve been avoiding my calls,” Amelie says, her voice barely above a whisper, the anxiety beginning to overwhelm her.
Phoebe found out. Phoebe found out and now she’s mad at you. You’re the worst sister. She’s going to hate you.
“You’re there, in Melbourne,” Phoebe sighs, blinking slowly and taking a deep breath, trying to gather all of her thoughts and emotions. Phoebe wasn’t mad at Amelie. How could she be? Her sister fell in love, that was obvious. Having a relationship, after everything, is what she deserved. Her lying about it, that’s what upset her. “Valentine’s Day is tomorrow.”
“Not sure what you’re getting at.”
“At dinner, on Sunday, you said you were seeing someone.” Her voice is flat, lacking all emotion, her eyes a bare blue, lacking their shine and glimmer that light everyone’s day. That breaks Amelie’s heart. “It’s Harry. You’re seeing Harry Styles.”
“Phoebe,” Amelie begins, quickly quieting as Phoebe opens her mouth to speak. Her intention was to listen, to not upset her any further.
“Don’t lie to me.”
“Wanted to tell you, I did,” Amelie says honestly, tears prickling her eyes as she takes in the hurt on her sister’s face. “How did you find out?”
“Cassie is a barista at the café on the private beach,” Phoebe sighs, running her fingers through her hair and shaking her head. “Could see Harry a mile away with those yellow trunks. On the way out, she wanted to see if he was still there, maybe she could say hello or something. There Harry was, standing over a girl, shaking his wet hair out, laughing. Cass took a picture and sent it to me. Whoever she is, Harry looks really happy, is what she told me.”
“Cassie posted it,” Amelie chokes, her anxiety rushing with thoughts that spring tears in her eyes.
Oh my god, everyone is going to find out. Everyone is going to find out and the bullying, the harassing, everything is going to start before you and Harry could even make it to two months together.
“Of course not,” Phoebe assures her, her heart breaking as soon as Amelie begins breathing heavier. “As soon as Cassie texted me the photo, everything made more sense. Mama showed me the picture you sent her of the beach, the hotel. All of it looked the same as the pictures people posted online. Knew it then. I told her that she could not post it.”
“Oh,” Amelie breathes, the sweat on her forehead beginning to dry.
“Hurts me that you didn’t tell me, Amelie. You’re my sister, my best friend. We tell each other everything,” Phoebe sighs,
“Phoebe, I.” Amelie has nothing to say.
“Are you happy?”
Amelie goes absolutely silent, pursing her lips together and lightly nodding her head. Harry steps into the room, a shy smile on his lips as he nods, telling her everything without a word.
“Are you happy? Are you and Harry happy?” Phoebe repeats, desperate to emphasise her meaning. Her sister deserves to be happy, whether she believes so or not. Phoebe could never be upset with her for that.
“I am,” Amelie smiles, genuinely smiling, taking a deep breath. Her honesty surprises her, the way the words are so easy to say shocking her. Happiness, like this, hasn’t been something she believed she could have. “For the first time, I am.”
“Then, I’ll be okay. You and I, we’re okay. I’m not upset.” Phoebe sucks in a breath, budding her courage in her chest. Phoebe never expected this to happen. “Put Harry on the phone.”
“Huh?”
“Tu m'avez entendu, Amelie.”
Harry’s eyes widen at the statement. He gulps, taking a deep breath and walking towards Amelie, nodding approvingly and settling on the bed beside her.
“Um, Phoebe wants to talk to you,” Amelie mutters, giving him the phone and nodding towards the bathroom. “’m gon’a go take a shower.” Grabbing her towel and nervously treading into the en-suite, she shuts the door slightly, barely enough space to hear.
Harry clears his throat, taking a deep breath before beginning. He can see that Phoebe is shaking. “Know that you’re mad at us, and I’m sorry.”
“Not mad,” Phoebe says nervously, her thoughts jumbled and trying to comprehend who is speaking to her on the screen. Never would she have thought that this would be the way she would him. “Just a little upset.”
“Understand if you are mad, because Amelie and I made the decision not to tell anyone, and that included you,” he sighs, scratching his neck nervously. “’m sorry you had to find out by someone else, but you should know that you not speaking to her is making her really upset.”
“Has Amelie gone in the shower yet?”
“Mhm,” Harry nods, unsure where the conversation is heading, accepting it, nonetheless.
“Do you know about Jack?” Phoebe murmurs, her voice growing quieter to ensure that Amelie wouldn’t hear. Upsetting her about him is not what she wants to be doing.
“Unfortunately, yes,” Harry mutters, desperately trying to not become angry. Hearing his name makes Harry furious.
“Amelie thinks I don’t know, and I don’t remember what happened, but I do, and I don’t ever want to see her that upset, that bad, again, okay?”
“Of course.” Harry smiles softly, admiring the way she so openly cares about her sister.
“Know you’re you and all, but that’s my sister. You can’t hurt her, okay?” Her voice is laced desperately, the concern evident in her eyes. Harry would never dream of hurting her, and he has to make sure she knows.
“Phoebe, I promise you, I won’t.”
Amelie’s eyebrows furrow together in confusion as Harry says that, her towel tucked around her hair and her body clothed in simply her panties and lace bra that he loves. Harry pats the bed, encouraging her to come closer to him.
“Not a bribe, but ‘m gon’a need you to tell me the shows you have tickets to,” Harry says, smiling as Amelie settles in the open space that he’s made for her.
“Um, San Diego and Santa Clara,” she stutters, her fingers shaking over her mouth as he hands her sister his phone and she typed in the dates for him.
“Alright. Talk soon,” Harry smirks, squeezing his girlfriend’s thigh and setting her phone in her hand, kissing her cheek, his body moving away from the mattress and taking his phone into the bathroom to busy himself until the call is over.
“Phoebe,” Amelie teases, mouthing a quiet, thank you, as Harry tosses headphones to her to talk, “I’m sorry I didn’t tell you. Don’t be mad.”
“Ugh,” Phoebe sighs, knuckling her eyes and taking a heavy breath. “I’m not mad. As long as you’re happy, I’m happy. Amelie, you deserve to be happy, even though you think you don’t.”
“Love you, Phoebe.”
“Love you, too,” Phoebe says quietly, turning her light off and settling under her comforter, her eyes beginning to close. “Don’t fuck this up for me, Amelie. Don’t fuck this up for you, either.”
“I’ll try not to, Pheebs, I’ll try.”
~
Harry reserved the most secluded section on the beach. Quiet waves crashing against the sand, twinkling lights around the posts, blankets and stray towels accompanying their picnic to lay on the cushion of the cabana, the sand slightly damp beneath their feet. Amelie can make out the chatter of the crowds in the distance, the sidewalk much too far for them to be seen.
“Like this,” Amelie smiles shyly, taking a bite of her sandwich and taking a swig from the wine settled between herself and Harry. “Quiet and very us. Nothing flashy and extravagant. That’s something I always wanted, y’know – to be happy, simply me and the other person.”
Harry presses a chaste kiss to her lips, his thumb and forefinger holding her chin, nosing her jaw with a kiss and squeezing her hand.
“Harry.”
“Hm.”
“Do you think that the stars align a certain way to make things happen? Don’t know, like, the universe wants something good to happen to someone, so the stars and the planets and moon move a certain way to make it happen,” she wonders, laying her sandwich down and leaning back on her hands, her head turned over her shoulder to look at her boyfriend, his body resting peacefully on the blanket, his head tucked on a folded towel.
“Jovian-Plutonian Effect,” Harry smirks, his eyes shining beneath the moonlight. “Think you’re mine if that counts for anything.”
“One thing I was thinking about the other day –” she begins, her eyes narrowing as his voice cracks to interrupt.
“You think about a lot of things.”
Amelie lightly smacks Harry’s arm, his laughter airy and making her heart swell against her ribcage. Her love for him is growing every day, and there is one moment every so often that makes her want to mutter the words that she swore she would never say to a man, ever again, the words that would break her heart eventually.
But you do love him, Amelie’s heart incessantly reminds her. That is something that happened. You fell in love.
“You and I,” she whispers, trailing her attention from the crashing waves to the moon lingering above them, the light casting above their illuminating skin, “whenever we’re apart, we’re staring at the same moon. It sounds stupid, I know, but there’s something comforting about that. You,” she hesitates, frightened by the words falling so easily from her lips, “you’re one of my closest friends. Don’t know, it’s just nice never feeling that far away.”
“Nothing you say is stupid. Don’t say that,” Harry sterns, gently poking her thigh to have her attention. “Only a phone call away if you need me, love,” he murmurs, taking her hand in his and kissing her knuckles. “Always looking at the same moon.”
“Know that I’ve only known you a month, but I’m proud of you. Not many people would have the courage to go on stage the way you do, travel so many weeks and months away, work the way you do. I admire you, Harry. There are so many people that you inspire, every day. I’m one of them.”
“Gon’a be honest, it’s hard sometimes, and it’s one of the only things that are truly hard. Missing m’family, you. Hope that you’ll come and join tour eventually, see what it’s like. ‘s my dream. ‘s like when your work is in an exhibit, y’know, the one place where everything makes sense. All the adrenaline and the screaming and everyone singing back to you. Nothing like it,” Harry rambles, moving the covered wine aside and kissing your knee sweetly. “Happy to make you proud, doll. You inspire me.”
“Hate being this, soft,” Amelie giggles, squeezing his hand and gently nudging their hands into his thigh. “Not very like us. Usually, you’re bothering me.”
“Don’t like sharing your emotions, I get that,” he sighs, turning over and laying his head on her thigh, smiling softly as she cards her fingers through his hair, scratching his scalp lightly. “Know that going through all that you did made you feel this way, and I’m sorry that it happened, but I want you to know that you can share things with me.”
Her eyes sting with tears, her lips pouting as Harry wipes a stray from her cheek. “Hate that Phoebe was mad at me. Honestly, it makes my stomach hurt. Didn’t want to hurt her by hiding this, us, you know? I just didn’t know how to tell her. Hard to really understand this all sometimes,” Amelie pauses, trying to find the proper wording to express herself.
Expressing yourself is hard enough on a good day.
“C’mere, baby,” Harry sighs, situating on the blanket and opening his arms, smiling as her body settles on his thighs, her arms tucked around his shoulders, his lips touching light kisses on her shoulder. He barely makes out her mumbled apology, his head moving away from her shoulder to stare. “Amelie, why are you apologising to me? You’ve done nothing wrong.”
“Crying into you because of my anxiety on a Valentine’s Day date,” Amelie laughs wetly, tears staining her cheeks, her eyes glossy as she stares into his, his thumbs drying her skin. “Hate me.”
Harry’s heart twists in his chest. He absolutely hates that Amelie feels this way. He isn’t quite sure what anxiety entails, the details and intricacies, but knowing that all of her thoughts and emotions are so deeply impacted by it hurts him. He would do anything to take it all away. “Don’t say that.” He nearly wants to mutter the three words they’ve been waiting to say. He hesitates, taking a moment to gather his thoughts back. “All I want is fo’ you to feel okay. You have me, I’m here.”
“Harry Styles.”
Her voice is airy, her hands clasped together around his neck, fingertips twirling the curls at the nape, her thumb tracing the cut of his jaw softly. Her mouth sponges kisses on his cheek, her breath hitching in her throat as his mouth steals her lips, his kiss gentle and lingering on her skin.
Harry knows that Amelie won’t verbally say more, yet the way her arms are tight around his shoulders, her mouth is rhythmic with his, their kiss taking their breath away, his hands squeezing around her torso to have her melt impossibly closer to him, tells him everything. Harry knows that Amelie trusts him, that eventually everything would be said.
All that was needed was time. Harry didn’t mind waiting.
His fingertips work at the buttons on her the dress – floral printed, naturally, his mouth kissing her shoulder as he nudges the jacket away from her torso. His mouth grew dry at the way her breasts accentuated the cut; the straps are sewn with thicker material for support beginning to slip off her shoulders. Her giggles echo in his ear, making his stomach swirl with butterflies and his heart beat so loudly he swears she could hear it.
“Quite possibly the worst idea you’ve ever had, Mr Styles,” Amelie smirks, manoeuvring her body beneath his and tugging the dress away, Harry’s shirt tossed somewhere near the basket, a sheet pulled over their bodies to hide them away, the cabana’s curtains tugged closed, the moonlight peeking through the slight cracks. “Don’t get us caught.”
“Don’t be loud,” Harry chuckles, his teeth nipping her bottom lip, her eyes rolling at his comment. “May or may not have a crush on you.”
“Considering you say that quite a bit, I think you do.” Her mouth moulds against his perfectly, a giggle leaving her lips as he fumbles to work his jeans down his thighs. “That’s what you get for wearing jeans.”
“Quit teasing me.”
“Make it so easy for me, though.”
“Quite lucky the way you flirt with me is endearing, Ames,” Harry teases, laying his jeans along with their clothes and straddling her waist, one knee tucked between her thighs, his forearms around her splayed hair.
“Call this flirting? Oh, this is nothing.”
Harry laughs, shaking his head and laying his lips on hers, soaking in the way she tastes faintly of wine and the swollenness of her flesh, her fingers lacing through his, squeezing his hand for comfort. He adores this, the way he can feel her calming. Harry savours the moment, the way their skin is clammy against each other and her thighs are wrapped around his waist, the way his heart is heavy in his chest because everything feels right.
Harry and Amelie couldn’t have pointed out the planets or the stars or the constellations underneath their makeshift blanket, their attention too obsessive with each other and the way they feel.
Although, Harry could have sworn that this is what it felt like to have Jupiter and Pluto align.
#loving you's the antidote series#harry#harry styles#1d harry#1d harry styles#harry 1d#harry styles 1d#harry x#harry x you#harry x reader#harry x y/n#1d fan fic#1d fanfiction#1d fan fiction#1d fic#1d ff#harry fic#harry fanfic#harry fanfiction#harry smut#harry angst#harry au#fic#romance#angst#harry styles au#harry styles fanfic#harry styles fanfiction#harry styles fic#harry styles ff
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There’s Gotta Be Some Butterflies Somewhere
(Wanna Share?)
this was originally going to be a fun little holiday gift for @cachekakusu (but now it’s more of an apology for making her relive her past 🌸✨ LiTerArY tRaUmA ✨🌸). In either case, it’s essentially a longer version of our chat threads, but i tried to make it as fluffy as possible to atone for my actions
hopefully it works aflksdj
At first only a dark screen was displayed, with shuffling and whispers heard in the background. Then someone hissed “Lens cap!!” and a picture suddenly appeared of two teenagers sitting at a long table; a laptop sitting in front of the girl and bright smiles on both their faces. “Hi everyone!” the girl spoke, directing her words straight ahead at what must have been the camera lens. “Welcome back to our channel. If you don’t already know, my name’s Lyra and this is Will.”
The boy next to her raised his hand in a slight wave. “And we decided we wanted to do something a little special for today’s video.”
“That’s right.” the boy continued, “To celebrate reaching five thousand subscribers – and thank you so much for that, by the way –” Lyra nodded fiercely next to him, echoing his statement. “we’re going to do a little ‘Get to Know Us’ Q&A.”
“We are!” Lyra finished. “And, point of notice; this is a livestream, so we’re just going to take the questions as they come, and you’ll get to see our completely unedited reactions to them. But please keep the questions like PG-13,” she added, “because I’m pretty sure Will’s mum still watches our videos.”
“Oh she definitely does.” Will confirmed. “And she and I would both appreciate everything staying mum-appropriate.”
Lyra laughed “Excellent. And hi Elaine!” she looked directly at the camera with a grin and a wave, then focused her attention on the laptop screen in front of her. “Oh wow and we already have our first question: from aeronaut_txn: how long have you known each other? Hm, it really has been a while hasn’t it?” she paused, thinking, “Will and I met when we were – what, 12?” she glanced over at Will and he nodded in agreement. “Actually it’s kind of a funny story; I first met Will after he got stuck under my porch chasing his cat.”
“Not Kirjava, by the way.” Will interrupted, looking only mildly embarrassed at Lyra’s last statement. “Our old cat, Moxie.”
“Of course not Kirjava,” Lyra snorted, “she barely ever leaves your side.” As if summoned by the mention of her name, the unusually large cat in question suddenly leapt up onto the table, fixing Lyra a look that would have been very judgmental were it coming from a human. Will grinned and reached up to scratch at Kirjava’s ears and the feline happily moved her attention to him, purring softly and butting her head against his hand while Lyra continued. “I’m convinced that if you could find a way to sneak her into school she’d never leave you alone.”
“Says the girl who hides Pan in her backpack every other day.”
“That’s because Pan is quiet, and sneaky, and good at hiding. And besides, Kirjava’s like three times his size.” Kirjava suddenly let out a low growl and leapt across the table to bat at Lyra with her paw. “Er….no offense.” Lyra reached slowly out and Kirjava seemed to let the slight pass, letting the teen scratch under her chin.
There was a sudden squeak and flash of fur as Lyra’s pine marten scrambled down from his usual perch on her shoulder and onto Kirjava’s back. “And now you’ve gone and woke him up.” Lyra huffed, but there was a smile on her face as she watched Pan and Kirjava start to chase each other around the table.
“I think if anyone’s to blame for that, it’s you.” Will laughed, gently shooing the animals off the table before they knocked something over. “Anyway, Moxie was….. let’s say she was a free spirit.”
“A very nice way to say she just did whatever she wanted.”
“Well yes, but she was a very good cat all the same. Although she did have a habit of running out of the house whenever she got the chance despite not being an outside cat at all. One morning a few summers ago I was helping my mum unload groceries and Moxie just sprinted out the door and was halfway across the neighbor’s yard before we even realized what was happening.
I ran out to go get her, but by that point she had already sequestered herself under their back porch. Should’ve been easy to grab her, but the space was a little…..narrower than I was expecting.
“I was on my way downstairs when there was this yowling noise out of nowhere; maybe the angriest sound I’d ever heard a cat make.” Lyra looked as though she was trying very had to hold back a laugh. “And then someone was calling ‘help’ from our backyard, so I went outside to look and all I see is Will’s little Spider-Man pajama pant-covered legs sticking out from under our porch.”
At this point Lyra was laughing fully, and Will wrinkled his nose in indignation. “It should be mentioned that my mum does her shopping very early; I wouldn’t have been wearing the pajamas otherwise. And anyway, they were cool for a 12-year-old.”
“Oh yes, very cool.” Lyra snickered. “Especially when I had to pull you out by your ankles and they almost fell dow-”
“Lyra!” Will snapped, clapping a hand over her mouth and glaring at her. “We don’t have to mention that part on camera.”
‘Right, right, sorry” she snorted, still looking very pleased with herself as she pulled Will’s hand down and addressed the camera directly. “Anyway, the point is, we were able to get Will successfully extracted, and luckily for him, I knew the easiest way to squeeze back under and grab Moxie.”
“Oh yes, we’re all very lucky that you liked acting like a feral child and digging tunnels into the mud under your back porch” Will muttered, rolling his eyes.
“Sounds like someone’s still stuck on the pajama pants and forgetting the great sacrifice I made in getting that cat back.”
Will let out an exasperated sigh “Not the scar-”
“You mean the giant scar I still have on my arm after your cat fought me tooth and claw on the way out from under that porch? That scar?”
Will covered his face and groaned “You know I think I’d rather deal with your mum twenty times over than have you keep holding that scar over my head.”
Lyra laughed at that. “You sure about that? She was steaming mad when she saw it – came running out the back door yelling about rabies and ruined clothes and ‘undignified behavior’ as if I wasn’t wearing a Mickey Mouse jumper and dungarees and, you know, twelve.”
“She was pretty imposing though.” Will admitted.
“She usually is.” Lyra sighed. “But you didn’t miss a beat – looked her right in the eyes and said ‘don’t worry ma’am, Moxie’s had all her shots’ and then….what was it?”
Will shrugged. “Something about how she should be proud to have raised such an upstanding citizen for a daughter – which is an hilarious statement, by the way, knowing you the way I do now –” Lyra snorted and stuck her tongue back at him. “and it seemed to satisfy her.”
“Oh the best way to appease my mum is definitely through compliments.” There was a slightly sour tone in Lyra’s voice, but it faded as quickly as it came. “I think that was when she decided she liked you.”
“She likes me?” Will sounded shocked.
“Well, not that she’d ever say as much, but I think she sees you as my most mature friend.” Lyra shrugged. “Sometimes I think she might even be a little intimidated by you. You might not know it for looking at him,” she said to the camera, “but Will can be very serious when he wants to be.”
“Well I have to balance you out somehow, haven’t I?”
“Oh shut it.” Lyra rolled her eyes and knocked her shoulder against Will’s, but there was a fond smile on her face nonetheless. “Anyway we didn’t really talk much after that and Will went back to his house, but we spent the rest of the summer in one of our backyards or the other, and when school started we found out we were in the same class, and things just kind of went from there.”
“And now here we are: four years later and I’m still stuck with her.” Will said through a smirk.
Lyra’s smirk matched his. “Mhm, lucky you. Anyway, next question.” Her eyes moved to the laptop screen in front of her and she began to read through the options.
“Ok let’s see… sky-iron-soul asked…what was your favorite film of the year?” Lyra immediately clamped a hand over her mouth, just barely stifling her laugh as she looked over at a groaning Will. “Oh I don’t know,” she began, removing her hand to rest her chin on it while she smirked at the irritated boy, “what was your favorite film this year Will?”
“Lyra, please-”
“Funny thing is,” she grinned towards the camera, “Will here has fallen asleep during every film we’ve ever gone to see.”
“Not every film!”
“Oh right, sorry, you did manage to stay awake for all of Cats. Would you say that’s because it was your favorite though?”
Will fixed Lyra with a deadpan stare. “No, I would say that was because you kept poking me in the side every five minutes to ask me what the hell was going on, as if I would possibly have any more idea than you”.
“Right, well, in my defense…” Lyra shrugged, “Cats”.
“Actually,” a voice spoke up from somewhere off-screen, “if you pay attention, Cats does have a fairly well thought out plot that you can follow-”
But the rest of the sentence was drowned out by the collective groans of the other two teens. “Roger, not the Cats debate again.” Will sighed, turning his attention to the unseen boy.
“It’s bad enough you made us sit through two hours of that monstrosity.” Lyra agreed. “Must you continue to torment us with it now?”
“Fine, fine,” Were Roger in front of the camera, it was easy to imagine he would be holding his hands up in in mock surrender. “I guess there’s no accounting for bad taste. But seriously Will,” he continued, seeming to pointedly ignore Lyra’s fake cough-covered ‘yeah, yours’ “The cinema’s the worst place to fall asleep. Why don’t you just nap in class like me and Billy?”
“Listen it’s not like I mean to-” Will paused as if he had just realized what had been said. “Actually, first of all, don’t do that, that’s bad” he continued, looking for all the world like a disapproving lecturer while Lyra snickered next to him like the teacher’s pet. “But I don’t go into the cinema planning on falling asleep, it just happens. I mean it’s dark and the seats recline and they’re actually weirdly comfortable-”
“And you constantly overwork yourself to the point of exhaustion.” Lyra interrupted.
“Lyra, please don’t start this again.” Will sighed, rubbing his eyes as if he was already tired of the topic.
Lyra was undeterred. “I’m not starting anything; I’m continuing a conversation you keep refusing to participate in.” Her face softened. “I’m not trying to berate you, but you do too much Will. I mean, A-levels, and your apprenticeship, and tutoring, and helping your mum around the house…. you do it all wonderfully, of course, but it’s still too much.”
Will shifted uncomfortably in his seat, avoiding eye contact with Lyra. “I just wish you’d get how important it is to take a break sometimes and relax, which is what I thought going to the cinema would be, but you always end up just snoring into my shoulder.”
Will squinted at her in disbelief. “I don’t snore.”
“Yes you do, but that’s not the point.” Lyra replied, cutting him off before he could argue further. “Honestly I don’t know why you even come anymore. I mean, what are you getting out of it?”
Will glanced at the camera, suddenly looking as if he wished very much they were having this conversation anywhere but in front of it. “Because…. you’re always so excited when something new comes out.” Lyra paused, taken aback for a moment. “And because you’re absolutely impossible to say no to.” He seemed to relax more as he settled back into his usual teasing tone.
“Seriously,” he continued, grinning up at the camera now, “the second she hears ‘no’ she pulls this sad, pouty face like you just kicked Pan across the room.” Still smiling, he turned his attention to Lyra, expecting a laugh or a sarcastic response, but found instead that she was simply looking at him with wide eyes.
“So you mean you’ve only been going…for me? Her voice was uncommonly gentle and her cheeks were unusually pink.
The teasing mood seemed to dissipate. “Well, I mean, not just for you,” Will began, nervously rubbing the back of his neck, “sometimes we go with Roger and Billy, after all…” Lyra’s eyes hadn’t left his face. “but yeah. Mostly, I guess.”
Lyra’s face broke into a wide smile. “Oh Will-”
“Now don’t go getting sappy on me.” He interrupted, nudging her shoulder gently with his own. “It shouldn’t be a surprise that I like seeing my best friend happy. Besides, it’s the same as you going to all those cooking classes with me, even though you burn everything you make.”
“I don’t burn everything.” Lyra sniffed, looking offended at the accusation.
“Nearly everything, then.” Will shot back.
“Alright fine point taken.” She replied with a grin and an eye roll. “And you’re right, it’s not a surprise. It’s just…..really sweet.” She smiled warmly at him and reached her hand out to hold his atop the table. “Thank you Will.”
Will grinned back at her and squeezed her hand lightly “Of course. So we’re still on for Friday?”
“Definitely. But from now on, I’m buying the tickets.”
“What – who says?”
“I say.” She smirked. “If someone’s going to pay for you to take a nap in a sticky-floored auditorium, then that someone’s going to be me.”
Will grimaced “But you’re already buying the popcorn!”
“Of course I am; I’m the one who eats all of it!”
“Fine” Will conceded with a roll of his eyes. “But from now on you can’t complain if I fall asleep on your shoulder.”
“Hey I never complained about that; I complained about your snoring.”
“I don’t snore!”
“And the drooling.”
“I do not-”
They were cut off by a very loud – and fairly irritated – “Ahem” from off-screen. Both teens jumped slightly, blinking in surprise when they found that their faces had somehow grown much closer during their bickering, and that they had yet to release their hold on each other’s hand. “Not to interrupt,” Roger’s voice came again (sounding like interrupting was in fact the very thing he had had in mind). “But you do have other questions here guys.”
“Right,” Lyra seemed to collect herself; pulling her hand away from Will’s and clearing her throat. “So anyway, next question. Ok, from nobiggerthanamustardseed: do you have any plans for the future? Wow mustardseed, you sure know how to bring the excitement.”
They both stopped to think for a moment. “Well,” Lyra began, “we’re both studying our A-levels right now, but I think Will has a more concrete idea for his further education than I do. There’s a lot of different subjects I’m interested in, but lately I’ve been focusing more on language.”
“Yeah you mentioned that,” Will broke in, “more ancient languages right? Like symbology?”
Lyra nodded. “But I’ve also been thinking about taking a gap year. Dr. Malone’s been saying she might need an assistant on her research trip next year, and her last paper on dark matter was fascinating. It’d be nice to do a little traveling too. I’d have to make sure I force you to visit me though,” she looked over at Will with a smirk. “Get your head out of the books.”
Will snorted in response. “As I remember it, having my head in the books wasn’t a problem when I was helping you study.”
“Yes, how could I forget, oh great Professor Parry” Lyra’s voice was dripping with sarcasm; Will only rolled his eyes in return. “No to be fair, I probably wouldn’t have passed my anatomy exam without your help, even if you were a bit of a drill sargent.”
“No, you definitely wouldn’t have.”
Lyra clicked her tongue in mock annoyance. “And just when I was trying to give you a compliment-”
“That’s what you call a compliment?”
“When it’s directed at you, yes. Anyway, enough about me; tell the people what you’re going to do.” But before Will could open his mouth to respond, Lyra was already talking again. “He’s going to be a doctor.”
Will laughed. “Well you don’t have to say it like that.”
“I can’t help it.” Lyra responded. “You’ve only been talking about it since KS3.”
“What, and now it’s a bad thing to have goals?”
“Of course not, it just gets old talking about all the courses you’ll need to take and the admittance requirements that need to be met.” Lyra sighed, but it was clear to see her complaints weren’t serious. She turned her attention to the camera: “But since you all haven’t had to suffer through all of that, I’ll tell you that Will is absolutely brilliant – got nearly perfect scores on his GCSE this year, an apprenticeship with NHS, and he’s already fielding scholarship offers for uni.”
Next to her, Will had covered his suddenly pink face in embarrassment, but couldn’t seem to stop a wide grin from spreading across it. “Even though you’re almost insufferably noble about it,” Lyra continued, “I am very proud of you, and I know you’ll make an amazing doctor.”
Will’s grin only grew as he uncovered his face to meet Lyra’s eyes. “Thank you.”
A beat of sincerity passed between them, interrupted almost immediately by Lyra. “And even though I cannot stand the thought of being forced to share you with the world, your gift is too great to keep you all to myself.” Will rolled his eyes at his friend’s antics. “So long as you promise not to forget little old me while you’re off saving lives.” Lyra continued, throwing a melodramatic arm across Will’s shoulders.
“You’re such a ham.” He laughed, gently shrugging her arm away. “Weren’t you the one saying you wanted to go to a different continent with Dr. Malone a few minutes ago?”
“I don’t recall that, no.”
“Besides,” he continued with a roll of his eyes, “we live in Oxford. Any university I’d want to go to is an hour away at most. You can’t get rid of me that easily, Belacqua.”
Lyra seemed to drop her theatrics, looking instead at Will with soft eyes and a gentle smile. “Is that so, Parry?”
“It is.” He answered, his expression mirroring hers.
Another beat passed between them, longer than the first, before Lyra’s attention shift back towards the laptop screen. “Alright everyone, I think we have time for one more question. Let’s see… here we go, from EP1985: how long have you two been dat – ” her sentence cut off suddenly, and she glanced nervously over at Will then up at the camera before continuing. “Oh no, we’re not –” but her words stopped suddenly again, her face very rapidly turning red.
His curiosity piqued, Will leaned closer to Lyra to read the question over her shoulder “We’re not what?” he asked, squinting at the screen to make it out, before his eyes grew wide and his cheeks grew red to match Lyra’s. “Oh! No, no, definitely not.” He continued with an awkward laugh, leaning back to sit ramrod straight in his chair and stare directly at the table in front of him, while all the time Lyra seemed as if she was trying to both watch his every move and pretend he didn’t exist.
There was a moment of silence as both teens avoided eye contact with each other, the camera, or – presumably – Roger. Finally Lyra cleared her throat and said, her voice slightly strained, “Sorry to disappoint anyone, I guess, but Will and I are… just friends.”
Her eyes flickered quickly over to Will, who nodded quickly in agreement. “Exactly. We didn’t mean to give you guys the wrong impression, but there’s nothing but friendship here.”
Hearing the other’s words seemed to let them both relax, although their faces were still flushed. “It’s kind of funny, actually,” Lyra began, catching Will’s gaze again, but with amusement rather than worry in her eyes, “how many times we’ve heard that since we started making videos.”
“Yeah it’s weird,” he replied, a grin slowly forming, “don’t know how everyone keeps coming to such a crazy conclusion.”
“Anyway, that’s all the time we have for today!” Lyra said, addressing the camera directly. “Thanks so much for your questions guys and we’ll –” Will’s voice joined her’s for their usual sign-off. “ – see you back here next week!”
Outro music began playing as Will and Lyra leaned their heads close in a now inaudible conversation, and the very last thing that was heard before the picture faded completely to black was Roger’s voice muttering a weary “Absolutely hopeless.”
#DON'T JUDGE ME THEY DESERVE STUPID OBLIVIOUS NORMAL TEEN AUS!!!!#LET THEM BE HAPPY UNIVERSE#IT'S THE LEAST YOU CAN DO#(also if anyone who spent any time in the uk reads this......no you didn't.#i did maybe 5 minutes of research into how schooling works there and i still don't fully understand it)#longpost
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Lauren’s Attunement///Voting & Distracting
(Video in the end of the post)
This fifth Lauren Attunement with Kat Calvin founder of
(Spread The Vote is a nonpartisan, nonprofit organization that helps people get government-issued photo ID). It was important because voting for good leaders is very important. Politics in itself is already a fairly complex subject to discuss because there are many points of view, political colors and idioms that, of course, I am not going to mention here because first, it has to do with American politics and I am not American, and second because it is actually a subject where I can only give my point of view and not cover what really matters. What is voting.
I know that if you want to have good rulers you must raise your voice, educate yourself and vote. It is a right that we are all born with and that we must exercise to change things, or at least make the attempt. I think the problem is not so much in voting for this and that candidate, but in realizing that he or she will fulfill all the campaign promises they made while seeking our votes.
Lauren was very right to call them motherfuckers about it because so many of them are. They are liars, thieves (especially thieves in my personal case, it has happened with most of the mayors of my city, those motherfuckers) and they change their mentality when they realize that they have a little power to make and break their whim.
And just like Lauren said, power is what ruins everything. What corrupts and what makes people after those important charges, such vile beings.
But not all politicians are equal and that must also be highlighted. I personally have the belief that you have to vote for who you see who do things for people. For those politicians who are always concerned about the people who have the least and who fight for their better well-being and not only work for the neediest people, but for everyone equally. And then there are people like Trump in the United States who seem to work for those of their own class, the businessmen, the people with the most purchasing power and at the same time, the most intolerant of the problems of others who do not have the same privileges as them.
And this pandemic has made everything worse. It has brought out the worst face of some (Those who are desperate for the economy to open because they need a hairdresser) and has brought out the best face of others who are concerned about the rest, about the people who need it and always it's there to help.
I do not know if it is the definition of human beings but this pandemic is going to change us. Perhaps not everyone, not in the same way, but humanity will change and the political class will realize that it will no longer be able to govern in the same way either.
This is why voting is so important. Not only in the United States but in all countries. If you want to see changes, you have to fight for them and the first step to do this is vote. Because even if the president who is elected is not the one of your choice, you have the reason to have voted for someone who represented you and the right to express the opposite opinion if the elected person is not.
You have exercised your right.
I think Lauren has been very clear on that and I have loved this Attunement for that very reason.
The second part of this post is not so serious but rather curious because I have received many anons and read tweets on Twitter that Lauren was very distracted throughout the livestream. I didn't quite understand what they were talking about because the first time I saw the Attunement I was busy and didn't pay proper attention to it even though I listened well to what Lauren talked to Kat about. Then I started to investigate and what they said was that many fans thought that Lauren's strange distraction was because Camila was in the Jauregui house and that Lauren was watching that she did not get in the way of the phone camera.
I did not believe it. At first it was hard for me to believe in the possibility but then I remembered that it is not the first time that this possibility could be real because we have always seen Camila at the Jauregui house. From TXF we have seen Camila together with Lauren's parents and siblings, so Camila's thought yesterday at Lauren's parents' house does not sound so far-fetched, especially when we already know that a circus collab and the Nick choice awards are coming to us in Latin America.
It is a possibility, it is. And it is, because Lauren was very distracted and always aware of what was happening around her, she was nervous and it is strange because when she is with her family she does not get nervous. She was always very vocal speaking out loud to her siblings and parents and we could hear them at some of her lives.
Except this time it was different. Also, she got scared with thunder in the middle of the broadcast, that was crazy because I didn't see her scary with that kind of thing, considering how normal those kinds of storms are in Miami.
The truth is, we can't guarantee anything, folks. They are possibilities. We are in the middle of a pandemic and traveling from one house to another is a bit complicated, although well, the girls have cars and the distances between the houses are short so that is not a problem but as we know, Camila is in the middle of a circus that she has had a significant investment and that business cannot fall apart due to carelessness, they know it.
But, we are Camren Shippers and we can afford to believe that they were together yesterday and that the Cabello were at the Jauregui house having a barbecue and leaving the diva sheltered in the guest house (Unless Lauren was worried that the Cabello had to drag the diva with them and that made Lauren angry) That would be crazy to even think about it.
I really expect anything from all of them and it is the truth.
A few things before closing this post.
Lauren a fan of Supergirl?
I don't know why this caught my attention, but it made me smile when I saw it and this other about her eyes
It gave me a scare at three in the morning. Camila's dream as a reptile and Lauren sacrificing half of her humanity to keep Camila human.
It was crazy. Thank you for reading.
youtube
#lauren's attunement#lauren jauregui#voting & distracting#kat calvin#spread the vote#livestream#camila cabello#thunder#personal thoughts#camren#politics#vote
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Masterlist
angst - 🌧️
fluff - ☀️
favourite - 👑
⚡ The Eboys ⚡
Will Lenney (Willne)
The Veteran - The reader surprises Will at a panel after fighting in another country for a year. (X Reader) ☀️
Kissing In The Rain - Will’s friends meet his girlfriend for the first time but the couple is to busy having an argument. (X Reader) ☀️
Pancakes, Anyone? - You make breakfast for everyone after a night out and Will realises how much he loves you. (X Reader) ☀️
Nail Polish - You and Will have a pamper night (X Reader) 👑☀️
Moving In - Will and Gee get a new neighbour and Will happens to find her very cute. (X Reader) ☀️
Get Better - Will helps you through a bad day of depression. (X Reader)🌧️
A Little Bit More - Will and Reader recite their vows at their wedding. (X Reader)☀️
Tough Guy - Will and Reader are complete opposites but somehow have a strong bond. (X Reader)☀️
Will’s Friend Otis - Will gets a dog to help with some problems he’s having, Will can’t find his confidence to talk to his friends. (Centric) 👑🌧️
Toxic - Part Two of WFO, a look through social media as Will deals with his mental health 🌧️
Hometown - Part Three of WFO, Will goes home to take care of himself but re-lives the worst memories possible 🌧️
Will Comes Home - Part Four of WFO, Will comes home and tries to do a Livestream. Stephen doesn’t let it happen for obvious reasons. 🌧️
Taking A Leap - You are scared of love, Will isn’t (X Reader) 🌧️
Deserving - You get fired from your job and Will comforts you (X Reader)🌧️☀️
Alex Elmslie (ImAllexx)
First Kiss - You have your first kiss with Alex after he lists the things he loves about you. (X Reader ☀️)
Hurt Me Once - Alex knows what his partner has been getting up to (X Reader)
James Marriott
Enough - Reader is content with the relationship they have with James, they decide to go public. (X Reader) 👑☀️
You Walked In And My Heart Went Boom - Reader and James have a heart to heart at 3am (X Reader)☀️
Grow As We Go - Reader thinks they need to break up with James in order to figure themselves out. Part of the Ben Platt Writing Challenge (X Reader)🌧️☀️
George (Memeulous)
Protective - George gets protective when Reader gets assaulted, he decides to do something about it. (X Reader) 🌧️☀️
Temporary Love - George doesn’t want this to be a one-time thing… Part of the Ben Platt Writing Challenge (X Reader) 👑🌧️☀️
✨ SIDEMEN ✨
Ethan Payne (Behzinga)
Baby Behzinga Meets Her Uncles - The Sidemen meet your month old daughter (X Reader) 👑☀️
“Dad, Can’t you hear me?” - Ethan opens up about his dad, the sidemen don’t realise how truly scary it is. (Centric)🌧️
Hush Hush - You are JJ’s best friend, he warned his friends not to date you, Ethan doesn’t listen. (X Reader)☀️🌧️
After Meeting A Little Early - You and Ethan have a son at the age of seventeen. the sidemen love him to pieces. (X Reader)☀️
Happy Hours - Ethan talks about you and your son on the Happy Hour podcast. Part 2 of AMALE (X Reader)☀️
Hooked - after a little too much drinking after JJ V Logan Paul, you and Ethan hook up (X Reader) ☀️
Doubt - Ethan has his doubts about being a father but you easily soothe him. (X Reader) 🌧️☀️
Top - Ethan sees you wearing his top and he decides to tell you something. (X Reader) ☀️
Losing The War Against Himself - Ethan is losing the war against his depression but other soldiers are going to fight beside him and help him win. (Cenric) 🌧️
Falling On The Battle Field - Ethan tries to take his own life, the sidemen try to cope (Centric) Part Two of LTWAH 🌧️
I Can’t Wait For Forever - The Sidemen film your’s and Ethan’s weddings, here are the fan favourite bits (X Reader)☀️
Secrets Always Come To Surface - Ethan’s secret gets revealed when someone appears out of the blue. (Centric)🌧️
Together In Isolation - Ethan loves to spend time with you in quarantine (X Reader)☀️
A Painful Memory - The Sidemen Roast is all fun and games until someone jokes about Ethan’s friend who passed away. (X Reader)🌧️
Fitting In - Ethan introduces you to his friends, you get a bit insecure because you’re a bit bigger then other girls (X Reader) 🌧️☀️
To Be Free Again - Ethan gets into a car accident and has to learn to walk again. There are moments where he wanted to give up but he quickly had his friends help him feel better again. These are some of those moments. (centric)🌧️
Dumb Ass Love - If Ethan had to chose between men being horrid to you or a bloody nose, he would chose the latter. (X Reader) ☀️
Unclear - Ethan’s addicted to heroin, the boys have to find a way to help him (Centric)🌧️
Best Couple On YouTube - You and Ethan take part in Simon’s Best Couple On YouTube series. (X Reader) ☀️
Harry Lewis (Wroetoshaw)
Tranquil - You and Harry are soft when others aren’t around. (X Reader)☀️
livestream - harry watches your livestream and realises you’re not okay (X Reader)🌧️☀️
What He Thinks - Not What He Is - Harry finished filming with the weight gained video and he feels terrible about himself so you have to teach him otherwise (X Reader)🌧️☀️
Moment To Moment - This is Harry’s story of his relationship with an abusive woman. (Centric) 👑🌧️
Flustered - Harry gets flustered when a pretty girl comes in for a speed dating video (X Reader)☀️
Medication - Harry suffers from bipolar disorder and has medication, it’s awkward when his friends find out. (Centric)🌧️
Surprise - Harry thinks the biggest surprise of the day was the boys forgetting his birthday, little does he know. (Centric)🌧️☀️
Waltzing - You teach the Sidemen to waltz, Harry gets partnered up with you (X Reader)☀️
Date Night In Isolation - The activities you and Harry get up to in quarantine. (X Reader)☀️
Unexpected But Adorable - You and Harry are famous Youtubers, no one expects your relationship (X Reader)☀️
Nightmares - You have vivid nightmares, thankfully, Harry knows what to do. (X Reader) 🌧️☀️
Cuddle Time - Harry wants to cuddle, the boys happily oblige. (Centric) ☀️
Taken Over - Harry has a seizure after a shoot, the guys help him. (Centric) 🌧️
JJ Olatunji (KSI)
Helpless - You perform your first show as Eliza Schylur for the music Hamilton and JJ supports you. (X Reader) ☀️
Jealous, Babe? - You watch Jaackmaate, JJ is jealous (X Reader) ☀️
Caring - JJ takes care of you whilst your sick (X Reader) ☀️
Not To Blame - You go to a party with all your friends, the night takes a twisted turn and JJ tries to understand it. (X Reader/platonic or romantic) 🌧️
Josh Bradley (Zerkaa)
Not Your Anxiety - The Sidemen don’t know how to handle Josh’s panic attack, luckily Freya is the best. (centric) 🌧️
Hard Worker Shouldn’t Over Work - Josh tends to overwork himself but luckily has amazing friends surrounding him. (centric)🌧️☀️
Vik Barn (Vikkstar123)
Not Just Banter - Sometimes, Sidemen banter goes too far and Vik needs comforting (X Reader) 🌧️☀️
Meeting On Minecraft - You and Vik met online playing Minecraft and now you meet in real life (X Reader) ☀️
Tobi Brown (tbjzl)
Small Comments - You and Tobi promised each other that you wouldn’t go public, so why was the comment left in the video? (X Reader) 🌧️☀️
Falling - You and Tobi were on the lowdown, but what is he doing with that other girl? (X Reader)🌧️
Simon Minter (Miniminter)
Antics - You and Simon have a fun night out and have to get your drunken selves home (X Reader) ☀️
Simon In The Bathroom - Simon gets ditched by his one friend at a party, now he’s alone in the bathroom (Centic) 🌧️
THE GROUP
Acceptance - You come out to the sidemen as a bisexual (Sidemen & Non-specified reader)
🔥 + FRIENDS 🔥
Stephen Lawson (StephenTries)
Brother’s Best Friend - You are Will’s twin sister and Stephen might be developing an itsy bitsy, small crush on you. (X Reader) ☀️
Callum McGinley (Callux)
The Most Confident - Cal meets Harry’s old school friend, he likes her immediately but is she too cool for him? (X Reader) 🌧️☀️
#sidemen#the eboys#willne#james marriott#stephen tries#callux#calfreezy#tbjzl#memeulous#imallexx#behzinga#miniminter#ksi#zerkaa#wroetoshaw#vikkstar123
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