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marshallsgirl · 8 months

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Don't leave part 2

Pairing: Eminem x Fem¡Reader

Warnings: 🔞 MATURE READ AT YOUR OWN RISK

Recommended song: The One - Kodaline

Author's note: I'm working on my graduation final project, that's why I haven't been so active lately. I wrote this and I don't know how I feel about it. I may delete it later or idk. Hope you all enjoy it. I love you guys so much! Sending all of you a warm hug🫂🤍

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January 14th, 2006

It's pretty late at night. I'm watching the news when once again I have to run to the bathroom. I'm throwing up again. I'm feeling sick. I can't even explain why I felt like doing this but...I'm taking a pregnancy test. I bought one earlier this morning but I couldn't do it. I was too scared. But I'm doing it now. I can't be pregnant. I mean...it would be nice to be...No, I am not pregnant. That thing is going to be negative!

The news reporter started to talk. Maybe it got my attention cause they played a song in the background. An Eminem's song.

"Today January 14th at 5pm Eminem and Kim got married for the second time around their fifteen anniversary. Kim said to People Magazine: 'Marshall wanted to do it because it was our fifteenth year together from our original day we started going out'. They repeated their vows from their first marriage..."

As the reporter is talking I'm looking down at my pregnancy test and I found the word "pregnant". And I started to cry. I've been waiting a long time for this moment but it isn't how I imagined it. I just found out that I'm pregnant and that my baby's daddy is married again. Even knowing this I feel the need to call Marshall. But I can't do that. He's probably on his honeymoon right now. He is probably spending such a great time being a family again. I know he did all of this for Hailie's happiness. I know he is trying hard to put his family back together. I can't call him.

So I called Proof.

"Oh, you saw the news, didn't you?"

"No...I mean yes, but I'm not calling about that" I said trying to control my tears.

"Are u okay? What happen?" I could tell he was concerned.

"Well...I kinda need an advice, man"

"Why? What did you do?"

"Nothing...I just..."

"Hey, y/n you can talk to me. We're good friends, aren't we? I don't care what happened between you and Marshall. You and I, girl. We can still be friends"

That made me lost control of my tears.

" Yo, y/n what happen?"

"Man, I'm pregnant" I confess. "Proof, I don't know what to do. I just found out that I am and I saw the fuckin' news..."

"Wait what that...you pregnant? Is it..." he didn't finish the question

"Yes, of course it's Marshall's"

"Shit...you got to tell him, y/n"

I knew he would say that, but I was hoping to be wrong.

"No, I can't do that to him"

"You know him, y/n. If you don't tell him he is gonna hate you"

"I know he deserves to know but he just got married and I know he wants to be happy with his family"

"So? I mean, he can be happy with them and at the same time he can take care of your baby, his baby. I know he'll want to be a responsable dad. You have to tell him"

"Proof, please I just can't...I'm too scared"

"Y/n, I want you to hang off the phone and call Marshall right now"

I needed time. Maybe tomorrow I'll be more brave. But saying this to Proof won't work.

"Listen, I'm going to do a blood test tomorrow just to be extra sure. Okay? If it is positive I'll call him right away"

"If you don't call him by tomorrow afternoon, I'll do it"

"Please, don't. I promise you, I'll call him".

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The blood test confirmed that I'm pregnant. But when I tried to contact Marshall he didn't answered his phone. So, I called Proof and he planned a reunion for us at Marshall's studio.

"Y/n?" he said when he saw me. "Are u looking for Proof? He'll be here soon, actually I'm waiting for him" he added.

"He's not coming. It's me who you are waiting for. I called you but you didn't answerd so..."

"I'm married" he said rapidly

"I know, Marshall. I just need to tell you something important"

"Go on then. I need to go back to my family, you know" it was something weird in the way he said that, like it was something he had to say it to believe it. I can explain it, I just know him too much. But I didn't ask him about it. So, I extended my hand to him. Letting him know that he needed to grab the paper (the blood pregnancy test) that was on my hand. He read it and then looked at me shocked.

"Is this some kinda joke?" he asked. "Why are u doin' this?"

"I am pregnant, Marshall. And listen I just thought you deserved to know. Even Proof told me that I should tell you 'cause if I didn't you'll hate me forever". I started to say. "I know you think I'm doin' this 'cause I want us to be back together but I promise you I'm not. I would never do something like this to make you leave your family".

"You really are pregnant...How long? How are you feeling?"

Now I could tell he was concerned.

" I don't know how many weeks I am. I just found out that I am pregnant, so I have no idea. And I've been feeling sick"

"Let's take you to the doctors then"

So we made a prenatal appointment.

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"The baby is 7 week and 1 day!" said the doctor.

I looked at Marshall's face. It looked like he was counting.

"So, you got pregnant on november 2005..." said Marshall as we both realized that my pregnancy started on the day he left me.

"Which means the due date is September 1st" the doctor told us.

"Oh, a virgo baby!" I said.

"Is it just one or there is more than one?" Marshall asked. I could tell he was really curious.

"I can answer that next week. The next appointment will be an ultrasound appointment, okay?"

I saw Marshall's face lighting up.

"Oh my! Our first ultrasound appointment?" I couldn't wait for that. That's exciting! I'll get to see my baby for the first time.

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In the car on the way back to y/n's home.

"Did you tell Kim about me? I mean, about me being pregnant" I asked. I was really curious to know if she got a certain reaction. But "no" was the only answerd Marshall gave me. "So, are u going to hide this from her?"

"I don't want to talk about it right now. Let's get you something to eat" he said.

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Time went by and Marshall finally told me that things were not good between Kim and him. He assure me that it had nothing to do with me or my pregnancy. Then he mentioned the word "divorce", but made it very clear that he wasn't doing it because of me.

"I'm really happy you are pregnant, y/n. But now it's not the time for me to be in a relationship" he said.

"Are you going to tell me what happened? It must had been something really serious. I mean, you got re-married and now just three month later you want a divorce"

"I trust you, but I really don't wanna talk about it. Can we talk about the baby?"

"What exactly you want to talk about?" I wonder

"Do you feel it's a boy or a girl?"

I really didn't know how to answer that. I've done all the things to predict the sex of the baby and it's pretty even. I mean, I got 50% girl and 50% boy. So, I have no idea.

"They'll call me soon to tell me my results on the last exams I did and they could tell me the sex you know"

"Are you going to surprise me?" he asked and then leave a kiss on my belly. We're both laying in bed. I was to tired to do the normal things I do like cook and clean. And Marshall volunteer to help me. I couldn't say no. For real, even if I say no he would probably throw me to bed and lock me in my room.

"Yeah, I'm going to surprise you. I don't know how yet but I'll do it".

"Okay, then I'mma go buy you something to eat. Any cravings?"

"Can you get me some donuts?"

"Yeah, I'll be back soon" he says and before he leaves he press his lips on my belly once again. "Love you" he added.

"The baby loves you too" I said.

"I love you, too y/n" he says letting me know that he said it for both of us, the baby and me. He is driving me crazy. I don't understand him. And people say women are the complicated ones. He doesn't want to be in a relationship and that's why he is getting divorce. So, I think he comes to see me and do shit for me just because the baby but then he is telling me he love me?

"Hey! I said I love you, y/n" he was already by the bedroom door. I know he won't leave unless I say it back.

"Stop it! You are going to get me all horny and shit"

"You’re horny preggers, aren’t you?" he says walking towards the bed.

"I’m fat and horny. It’s disgusting."

" Nah, you could be 300 pounds I’d still do you".

Maybe it's because I'm hormonal but I'm touched and I start crying.

"You're so fuckin' romantic" I say

He sitting by the edge of the bed now. He is touching my belly. His touch is soft. I want to say that I love him. But, honestly I'm just to scared to do that.

"I feel it's a boy. And I can't wait to see the way you're with him. You're gonna be incredible" he says "I love you, y/n" he assures me.

"I'm nervous..." I manage to say

"I'm nervous too"

"No, you are not!" I replied

"Y/n, I'm not divorce yet... The truth is I'm just waiting for that to be done so I can...so that we can try to do this right. You're my home and I'm sorry it took me a lot of shit to finally understand that. You've always been there for me. I've always came back to you, every fuckin' time. I was so stupid. I'm truly sorry. I promise you I'll never ever hurt you again. I won't leave you. I promise for as long as we're together, to never, ever put you through anything like that again."

"Marshall..."

"Wait, I know it's going to be difficult almost impossible for you to forgive me, but please try. Please, y/n. 'Cause I miss you a lot and I love you even more. You don't have to say it back, though. You don't have to say nothing at all right now. I completly get it". when he finished he got up and left the room really quick. He didn't give me time to express myself.

"I love you, Marshall" I said to the nothingness.

A moment later my phone starts to ring. It's my doctor. She started to tell me about my result and how everything was normal and that I need more vitamin C and then she said:

" This also tell us the sex of the baby. Would you like to know?"

"Yes!"

"Would you like me to tell you over the phone or..."

"Over the phone it's okay" I didn't even let her finish her question. I was to excited!

"Over the phone it's okay?"

"Yes"

"Okay, let me open it up...Alright it looks like you are having a baby boy!"

Omfg! I'm crying, now. Marshall was right! Oh, man I'm having a boy!

"Omg, thank you!" I manage to say

"Congratulations!" said my doctor before ending the phone call.

I couldn't wait to tell Marshall. I needed to surprise him. So, I figurate out a way to do so. I grab a white mug, his favorite mug actually (and it's not his but mine). But okay, it's his favorite. And I wrote inside at the buttom of it: "it's a boy". Then I prepared him a mixed berry smoothie.

He came back just in time.

"Here, try this" I said giving him the mug.

"What are you doing out of bed? Why are you holding my mug? What is this?"

"Marshall, just drink it! It's a mixed berry smoothie and...it has the sex of our baby!"

And just as I finished to say that he started to drink it. He finished in seconds! And as soon as he read what was inside, he ran to put the mug on the table and then ran back to hug me and lift me in his arms.

"Marshall, we're having a boy!" I got my arms around his neck. Enjoying that moment. I was crying but all happy tears.

"Yes! Oh my God, what the fuck! Life is crazy!" He kept saying this words. He was really happy too.

"God is so beautiful!"

"I told you! I knew it was a boy! I fuckin' told you!" He said as he put me down.

"Holy shit, I know that's crazy!"

He knelt in front of me and kissed my belly and then said:

"I knew you were in there the whole time. I love you, son"

#eminem #eminemslimmarshall #marshall mathers #slim shady #the real slim shady #eminem x reader #marshall mathers x reader #eminem gif #marshall mathers x y/n #eminem x y/n

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ettelenethelien · 2 months

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Beleriand Dashboard Simulator • part 3

Part one, part two

🔆 hador-lomin following

1 722 notes

♟️narrond following

wait, are @turin-deactivated4841207 and @outlaw-neithan-deactivated4880911 the same person as @mormegil?

⚔️ adanedhel

Not really my business to say, seeing as I'm neither of these, but people have reasons for changing blogs/names/URLs. If this was true and if I was that person I would be very annoyed at whoever posted such a thing for everyone to see.

#please take it down for general safety of people who might need it

4 notes

⚓ nenil-noriel

I am sick and tired of Gondolindhrim complaining they're bored. How about you try living here and fighting orcs for a while? I'd be glad to switch.

👤 house-of-the-mole following

I'll let you know we fought alongside everyone in the Nirnaeth.

⚓ nenil-noriel

Sure, do pat yourself on the back for doing the bare minimum.

17 089 notes

👰🏼‍♀️ celebrin following

Guess who got engaged today?!!! 💕💍🥰

#no one even got ordered to bring a Silmaril lol #so I dare say it went perfectly #!!! #can you tell I'm excited?

31 notes

🎼noldolanteyy following

thinking of changing my url (for pretty obvious reasons)

#doriath kinslaying

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🎼musiquendil-former-noldolanteyy following

No, really, this is the worst time ever to be a musician. I'm not pretending that the way he let us down is in any way worse than everything else Maglor Feanorion has done, but...

Can we separate art from the artist when the art itself is so interwined with the artist's deeds? Can we appreciate the noldolante itself ignoring that it was entirely a lie, regrets that apparently didn't stop him from committing the same evil over again?

But it is impossible to cut oneself away from all influence Maglor Feanorion has had on our music. And even keeping to the apolitical pieces, should we ignore the person of the artist? Does it help anything?

It's like the famous Fëanorian lamps debate all over again. Do we change the name since we're uncomfortable using it? Do we try to forget who was their creator - but is that even ethical, no matter what evil he wrought? Or is that maybe wrong? Maybe, if we use the lamps, we should be discomforted?

#I really don't know how to approach this

101 notes

👰🏼‍♀️celebrin following

So, we've arrived at the havens. I thank you all for the condolences, thoughts and prayers... I still don't know what to do from now on, but I guess maybe I can finally rest a bit. And mourn.

To all the people asking, yes, my husband and son are thankfully okay; this is the one silver lining. My son seems to have made a friend already...

#personal #gondolin

32 notes

🕊️queenelwing-unofficial

putting this under cut so I can delete this later, but please have a passionate rant about how a girl actually feels about receiving missives from the people who killed her parents.

#honestly why do they presume I might want to actually meet with them #though tbh now that the anger's worn of I'm mostly afraid #and of course my husband *has* to be gone right now... #I'll probably delete all this tomorrow but I couldn't help myself

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#a lot of personal stuff in this one...#//#my post #great tales #idril #fall of gondolin #elwing #maglor #noldolante #peoples of Beleriand #Tolkien #Silmarillion #unreality #in-universe texts #in-universe documents

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inhibitionfreewriting · 6 months

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r u a noah kahn enjoyer? not sure if ur taking requests rn but northern attitude for ludwig

oh not this song make me feel a lot of emotions 😳 okay.

listen. i've never heard this song until you suggested it. first of all, thank you for the suggestion. second of all, my heart vomited this up but i like it.

there will be AT LEAST a part 2 because when i got to where i got to i was like okay time to put it down and look at this again tomorrow. this is my version of putting down a piece of art to look at mistakes tomorrow, except i'll be writing more tomorrow.

-- PART 1 --

You and Ludwig hadn't seen each other in a few years, a fall out due to graduation and time. It's funny, they say you'll lose the friends you made in high school but the ones in college are friends for life, yet here you were with one of your friends from high school asking you how you knew Ludwig.

"We went to college together. We were study buddies, how do you know Ludwig?"

"He's a streamer - how do you," she stopped and put the picture frame down. "How do you not know that? You're online, like, all the time?" You shrugged. You were on your computer all the time but you worked on graphic design, you weren't necessarily on the internet. Half the time you just listened to music.

The curiosity gets to you though, would he remember you? You certainly remembered him - plenty of nights in one of your rooms, working on homework together, a night or two drinking shitty wine and watching a movie. A love found but lost.

you: hey ludwig not sure if you still have my number but we were friends in college, heard you are a big streamer now, good use of an english degree lol

An olive branch, a life line, even. You put your phone down, either he'd delete it because you seem like some random fan or he had your number blocked. Within minutes though, you had a reply.

Ludwig: how could i forget you i wouldn’t have passed biology without you. glad SOMEONE appreciates my english degree; usually i’m roasted for it 💀

You laughed. You made fun of him for it from the moment you met him, it made sense that everyone else did too. Conversation flowed easily. You couldn't remember the last time you laughed so hard, and honestly, he couldn't either. It was easy for you two to fall back into a rhythm, like it had only been a weekend apart.

Ludwig: would you ever want to get lunch or something?

He would never admit to how long it took to get the courage to ask, just as you would never admit how little thought you put into your 'yes of course!' reply.

Just a few days later and you were walking into a little café with him standing up to greet you and banging his knee into the table, yelping.

"Oh my god you didn't have to stand, I'm not the president," you laughed, crossing the distance and embracing him in a long awaited hug. He returned it, shrugging off your comment and for the first moment of many today, it felt like nothing had changed at all. Ludwig's arms tight around you, he still smelled like the same mix of deodorant and cologne. Something akin to a forest, teakwood... maybe birch. Something generic but home to you.

"It's good to see you," his voice was quiet in your hair, almost lost. There was a pounding in his chest that made his hands sweat and when you pulled away he anxiously rubbed his palms against his jeans. You both sat, your bag sliding between your feet at the table and conversation flowed like a waterfall.

How has life been? How are your folks? Do you still talk to anyone from school? How do you like streaming? What's been the best part of the experience? Are you in love with anyone? What do you do now, for work? Do you like it? Do you still go to the movie theater? Do you still think of me when you watch Crimson Peak?

"Do you still have that stuffed chipmunk I won you?" He leaned back in his seat and knocked his feet into yours. Suddenly, the embarrassment bubbled up onto your face, cheeks getting hot-hot-hot and he noticed. "If you don't it's okay."

"No I- I do. I uh," you felt like you were going to pass out, Ludwig leaned forward and rested his head in his hands, a shit-eating grin sliding onto his face. "I still sleep with it? It just. Lives on my bed." He wanted to tease you about it, keeping such a stupid memento for the past, what 5-6 years? But any comment was caught in his throat. "Well, say something already! I know you want to!"

"I-I'm just happy you still have it... would have thought you'd toss it out or somethin'," he found it hard to look you in the eyes, choosing to look at the cup on the table.

"How could I ever throw Mr. Stripes out? He was basically our mascot to get through tests. He's my good luck charm." You knocked your foot into his a few times, light taps and he looked back up at you with an almost nervous smile.

Hours had passed, drinks and snacks had come and gone. Your volume had only gotten louder and the laughter more rambunctious. One of the employees came over and Ludwig wiped the tears from his eyes.

"I'm so sorry, we're about to close for the rest of the day. Do either of you maybe want anything to go?" You shook your head, finally calming down from laughter.

"Thank you, I'm okay. Lud?"

"I'm good too," he shook his head, standing up. "Sorry if we deterred any customers, didn't mean to be so loud." The worker shook her head with a pleasant smile.

"It was nice to see you and your girlfriend on such a nice date."

"Oh we're not-" "We're not dating."

"Oh! I'm so sorry. Anyway - we close in a few minutes. We hope to see you two again." She left before you could reassure her it was fine and not an issue but Ludwig was holding his hand out like you need the help to stand up. You take his hand regardless after grabbing your bag.

"You uh, wanna come back to my place?"

"Sure."

#ludwig ahgren x reader #ludwig x reader #ludwig #bunny writes #bunny qs

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floufli · 11 months

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Fanfic ( Miguel x reader) update

So as I said on @smotheredinlighterfluid post about a prompt that I've been working on in a fic I started last week here's a fic update.

Acknowledging the results from the pull I made earlier today I'll try to post chapter by chapter which should keep me motivated long enough to actually end the thing lmao. I'll try to do 3000 words chapters, that's easier to do on the long run I think.

Right know I didn't see the movie so I can't write much more cuz I don't want Miguel to be ooc (I know the pain)

I should see it tomorrow so fingers are crossed .

SO- to put things in perspective and not deceive anyone if they're waiting, the fic will include tags/prompts such as:

! I'M NOT A NATIVE ENGLISH SPEAKER SO THERE COULD BE SOME WEIRD SENTENCES FORMULATIONS / ERRORS !

non minor friendly under the cut :/

Pheromones intense reactions/instincts

Biting / Marking (public) you'll understand when the scene will appear)

Spiderwoman!Reader x Miguel ( If I have the time I'll make it male! Reader but Gn!Reader are a bit complicated to write for my plot specifically)

Reader is like Miguel but better

Dom!Reader mainly ( there's enough sub!reader out here to feed everybody >:c but there will be none in this household )

okay SOME switch!Reader / suby!Miguel

Angst (not too much...okay a bit but it's for the plot I swear )

Character trauma study

Fluff / Comfort (I need to hug this man)

Slowish burn ( I'll say it'll be 30k and it will be 40k and still not finished so idk)

Emotional constipation / Negation of feelings

An unholy amount of smut ( not at the beginning though again I get carried away by the plot easily)

Pegging probably

Blood and Injury

Canon typical violence / Violence

Canon Divergences obviously

Shitty writing but that's okay

2nd Person Reader, I literally hated it at the beginning and now can't write anything else.

Should be an happy ending, but if you want it to hurt I can easily bring the worst in myself to do an alternative end ^3^

Going from the end of Into the Spiderverse to Beyond the Spiderverse

At the moment there are:

4k ish words / 30Kish maybe more surely more

the final scene is mostly clear in my head so plot should follow.

I will post it on AO3 and tumblr if y'all appreciate it enough .

Hope it will met your tastes when it's out, and feel free to propose idea in the comments if you are inspired !

I'll edit this as the inspiration goes.

Tag list : (tell me if you want to be added/deleted)

@stany0url0calwh0res111 @mira-dystopiancore @smotheredinlighterfluid @vvitcxen @st4rrlighttt @mstozierr

#miguel o'hara x you #miguel x you #miguel x reader #miguel o'hara x reader #miguel o'hara #reader #prompts #info #spider man 2099 #across the spiderverse #fanfic #fanfiction #ao3 works #ao3 tags #tumblr writing prompt #spiderman

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duskwoodgirl4life · 1 year

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I Think I'm Leaving You.....

MC and Jake had been together for 5 years now they had gotten married and had a baby. Jake was now free he had a new job working for the FBI it was sometimes long hours but worth it. Lately Jake had been working more than ever, and when MC questioned him about it he would snap at her.

One day MC had finally had enough she packed an over night bag, along with the baby's bag. She left a note pinned too Jake's office door and left the apartment, not sure where too go MC pulled her phone out and called Jessy.

MC: hey Jessy, is it okay if me and willow come stay for the night

Jessy: of course but what's happened?

MC: it's a long story I'll tell you when I get too yours

MC put her phone away and started the car driving too Jessy's her thoughts drifted off too Jake, had he even noticed she had left? Maybe if he had he would of text or phoned by now.

Back at the apartment Jake had finally finished what he had been working on for the past month. He came out of his office and noticed the note pinned too the door he pulled it off and read what was inside.

Dear Jake,

I can no longer take all this raido silence I understand that your work is important, but it's been a month since we last had a proper conversation. It's also been a month since you last interacted with your daughter. I'm sorry Jake I will always love you

All my love MC

Xxxx

Jake slid down too the floor with the note still in his hand, he quickly grabbed his phone and sent MC a message.

Jake: MC please come back home I am so sorry I have finished my work now, I love you so much. I will never let this happen again I promise you from now on its me, you and willow. Xxx

Jake sat watching his phone as MC wrote and deleted what she was going too write

MC: Jake, I'm sorry I just can't do this anymore I will talk too you tomorrow xxx

MC arrived at jessys with willow in her arms

MC: thank you so much for doing this Jessy

Jessy: it's okay, what's happened?

MC: it's Jake, he's been so busy this last month he's had no time for me or willow he's hardly spoken a word too me

Jessy: I understand that it's got too be frustrating having too deal with that

MC: it really is, I don't know what too do anymore, he did text me before though

Jessy: what did he say?

MC: that he had finished his work and from now on it's going too me just me, him and willow.

Jessy: do you believe him? I have a feeling you do your crazy about him

MC: your right as ever, I guess I should go back and sort this mess out

Jessy: well we have been talking all night and willow is still asleep, why don't you leave her here and come back for her later

MC: would you really do that for me Jessy? Thank you so much

MC hugs Jessy and kissed willow on the forehead before leaving too go talk too Jake.

The next 24hrs where complete hell for Jake, he didn't get a wink of sleep he just sat by the window watching the rain hitting against it. All he could think about was MC and how he might of lost her forever MC is Jake's whole world. The next thing Jake knew was being woken up by MC he had drifted too sleep off.

Jake: MC!! You came back!! I am so, so sorry I love you so much

MC: Jake, I love you I always have and always will, but this past month as been so awful.

Jake: please forgive me my work as now finished, I can focus on you and willow

MC: do you really mean that?

Jake: I really mean it MC

MC walked towards Jake putting her arms around his neck and kissing him softly on the lips.

Jake: I love you MC

MC: I lov you Jake

Jake: I promise you I will never put my work first

MC: I hope so, I really want too believe you

Jake: have I ever broke a promise yet?

MC: no, no you haven't come on let's go get coffe and pick willow up from Jessy's

#duskwood #duskwood jake #everbyte game #duskwood hacker #iamjake #i love you jake #duskwood jake x mc #jake x mc #duskwood jessy #i love you #i love him #he loves me #heartbroken #i'm so sorry #i'm leaving

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killemwithkawaii · 2 years

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L.S.S.: No progress on leaving, but the inbox has some new stuff… I guess we can see if anybody has any more ideas before we try and figure out our sleeping situation?

Mitch(1): [typed] Yeah, okay. And we thought the sheets were dirty when we got here…

L.S.S.: Good to hear from you, MJ. Yeah, the last few days have been… not ideal.

Mitch(1): [indecipherable]

L.S.S.: What? I know that’s putting it too lightly. Sarcasm is my defense mechanism of choice, you know that.

So, fae are real, huh? And you got spirited away by some fairy king creep while you were walking alone in the woods at night? Wow. Shocker. Why am I not surprised…

Mitch(1): [typed] MJ! You’re okay!! I’m so relieved…!

L.S.S.: Oh my god, you actually punched him over that? Ha! Serves him right!

Mitch(1): [typed] I usually don’t think violence is the answer, but when the chips are down and you have no other choice, it can be necessary. Hopefully, that punch will be enough of a warning. Just try to talk it out with from now on him, okay?

L.S.S.: And if that doesn’t work, go for the balls. Fae have balls, right? Keep us updated, I’m actually kind of curious.

Mitch(1): [typed] keep us updated so we know you’re okay!

L.S.S.: Oh yeah, that too. I thought that went without saying…?

Mitch (1): ….

L.S.S.: WOAH, AWESOME!! It's the medical supply motherload!! Damn Meadow, way to come through...! I guess we can start patching ourselves up, huh Mitchie? If we're still alive somehow, maybe we can heal, too...? It's a stretch, but it's not like anything else here makes any sense, so it's worth a try... oh, hey, I bet I could learn to pop some wheelies in this thing [the wheelchair], once we reset my arms and fingers! Nice...

Mitch(1): ......

[typed] Thank you very much, Meadow. It's really thoughtful of you to give us all this. We'll be sure to put it to good use.

L.S.S.: ...are you okay?

Mitch(1): .....

[typed] Yes, I'm fine. I think I just need some more water in my skull hole. And I want to start picking this glass out of me, since we have tweezers now.

L.S.S.: ...

Okay, yeah, of course, we can do that... er, I mean, you can do that... I'd help, but I can't really do fine motor functions right now.

Mitch(1): [typed] Okay.

L.S.S.: ....

L.S.S.: It is really weird, but so is everything else about this situation, sooo...

Mitch(1): ...

[typed] We looked behind it, but I don't think we looked closely at the back. I'll take a look.

......

[typed] What does 'K.E.W.K.' stand for?

L.S.S.: It says that on the back?

Mitch(1): [typed] It has 'K.E.W.K. x L.S.S.' scratched into the wood in a little heart. L.S.S. is what you go by with your friends, right?

L.S.S.: ... shit, that... probably isn't good...

Mitch(1): [typed] This painting seems like nothing but trouble. Should we try to throw it away? Should we destroy it?

L.S.S.: No! That might make things worse! Besides, I... if we are stuck here forever, I... kind of want to keep it...

Mitch(1): [indecipherable, angry]

L.S.S.: What? It's theirs. I don't know if I'll ever see them again... I can't keep something to remember them by?

Mitch(1): ....

L.S.S.: ...?

Mitch(1): [typed]Sal, I'M MITCH! The only reason you were ever with the others is because you couldn't have me, remember? Why do you want to keep something from my copy when I'm right here?!

L.S.S.: They're not your copy. They're you.... just different. And I was supposed to be with them this month... I'm supposed to be with them right now.... I may be here, but I still I miss them, just like I missed you. What's wrong with that...?

Mitch(1): ........

[text deleted]

.......

L.S.S.: ........

Listen, it's been a fucking crazy day and we're both exhausted. We'll talk more about this in the morning, okay?

Mitch(1): ..........

L.S.S.: ... c'mon. Let's change the sheets and get in bed. We'll talk and keep trying to figure out how to get out of this 'box' tomorrow. Who knows, maybe we'll wake up and be back to normal again...

Mitch(1): .... [nodding]

L.S.S.: Okay. Here, I'll... hold down a corner of the sheets, I guess....

Mitch(1): .......

#the staycation 🏡💙#l.s.s. answers #meadow chan #MJ #tw unreality #tw death #tw injury #tw body horror #tw violence #tw kidnapping #penpal!mitch #meet the fishers

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dzpenumbra · 1 year

Text

11/28/22

And... it's 4 AM. This time I got sucked into Twitch, and honestly... again... it wasn't worth it. I swear, it never is. Like... there was a point where I was actually laughing out loud which was absolutely a good way to spend my time tonight, but it was like... laughing hard for one 20 minute bit in like... 5 hours of watching. I don't think that evens out. But god, I'm just starving for normal human interactions, so much that I'll just tolerate that.

I spent a good chunk of the day editing my old Session raw recordings from October. I was documenting my progress of learning how to skate in Session on Hardcore mode. I planned to make a highlight reel. Today, I clipped all that, rendered them and cleared up like 100 gigs of hard drive space by deleting the raw files. Now I have space for Rimworld... and I'm a bit back and forth about it, as I said the other day? Maybe yesterday? I'm a bit lost in time.

I don't know if I want to just delete the 7 hour playthrough and start over - because there's no sound and the last session didn't record for god knows how long because my hard drive was full. It's hard to part with them when it's not on the story's terms, when it's my fuck up. Like a technical problem or something. So I guess I'll figure that out tomorrow. I have bigger things to talk about tonight.

I had an intense conversation with my mom about my dad. And... it's getting a bit too overwhelming for me. Like... I'm not a therapist. For decades I would try and try and try to be there for people, and I was. I would shoulder their burdens and let them just dump whatever onto me and I'd just process that shit for them. ... I mean, I can't process that for them, but I'd just like... mop up their emotions after they vented and they'd just not deal with their problems and just drink in the catharsis. I thought I was helping. But once I was made aware of how I'm a much more sensitive person than most, I started to realize that... well... first off... none of these people are offering this in return for me. At all. Why? Because my feelings are too strong for them, that's been the most common answer. They're scared or intimidated by them, and the prospect of taking them on. Here's the contradiction, the weird one. They don't want to take on my stress and support me the way I supported them because of my sensitivity, and yet they don't hesitate to dump stress on me despite my sensitivity. And then I realized, I was giving them too much credit. Credit that they were actually considering how any of that shit affected me at all, or that they even knew me, honestly.

Okay, well I don't want to talk about my dad or that thing with my mom, it wasn't bad it was just a bit much for me and I'll be vocal about it later. But what really put it over the edge was... getting a phone call. I got a call that I... for some reason thought was a telemarketer or something? I had no idea what to expect, who it might be. I can't stress this enough - I do not get phone calls. Even texts. It's just not something that happens in my life. If my phone is ringing, it's either my mom, a telemarketer, grubhub or a vet/doctor. So I see this phone ringing as I'm getting my socks on getting ready to pick up my food delivery... and I just assume it's... okay, welcome to NerdVille - Bolivar. I know this dude's name because every time this guy gets my delivery (and that's pretty often) I start cracking up because I want to do a montage thing of screengrabs of his GPS car driving all over the city and call it "Bolivar's Travels". And I think it's fucking hilarious and cool. ANYWAY. I thought it was him calling to let me know the food was here, they do that sometimes. I could not have been more wrong.

The person who called me. Was my old "friend" from high school. I'm really struggling to actually say the words. She was my... best friend. In like late junior to senior year. She was not a good friend. But she was social, and she introduced me to people, and we'd go on adventures. She got me regularly smoking cigarettes and weed. She would pick me up at my house in her ratty old car "Smoky" and we'd go cruise around and smoke a shit ton of weed and Marb 27's and listen to music and look for people to chill with. She kinda treated me like garbage, and fucked me up pretty bad.

I might as well vent this shit now, because I don't wanna carry this for too long. Big gigantic trigger warnings here, because I'm kinda just letting traumas out to breathe a bit here, just a heads up, I put the tag thing on but I just want to be considerate. She was supposed to do mushrooms with me the first time I did them, we ate them together and she took me to a Friendly's right when they were kicking in, then she fucking left and abandoned me there. Like... I could've gotten arrested. And I somehow miraculously ended up at my crush's house. And I had a big crush on this girl. And she invited some dude over, I guess to like... help her supervise or make her feel safe since she was alone with me or something? Like I'm threatening at all, I just wanted to look at her art and flirt or something, I was a fucking virgin on mushrooms, I would never even know where to start with hooking up with her, it wasn't even on my radar. She had bunk beds in her room and she got me into the top bunk and she and the dude went into the lower bunk and either I had a really vivid panic attack or they hooked up right underneath me while I was tripping. And that scarred me, because I've always been developmentally pretty far behind other people, especially when it came to anything having to do with sexuality, so... that really messed with my head. So, that ended that crush pretty quick... And bravo to my "best friend" for taking me to and then ditching me at a crowded restaurant.

She also tried to get me to "lose my virginity" by getting me really fucked up, locking me in a dorm room with a mutual friend and having her try to "seduce" me. Aka assault me. And she did, and that's all I'm gonna say about that.

She also invited me to live with her and her crackhead boyfriend (oh don't worry, I'm sure she was a crackhead, too) in Colorado, so I flew halfway across the country by myself. My first flight. Alone. Met her there, lived with her for like 3 weeks in Denver. Then she started fighting with her boyfriend (who barely socialized with me at all) and decided she was fed up and flew back home, ditching me with this dude. And he was basically a stranger to me. So, I considered myself homeless, and I just wandered off on my skateboard with all my possessions in a backpack. This kid who partied with them who I met like 3 times got his parents to let me stay with them for a few weeks. I couldn't find a job, we made a bunch of art and played video games but like... it wasn't going anywhere. And I finally swallowed my pride and called my mom and had her fly me back home. I was 19, I think? Tool's 10,000 Days album came out that year, so yeah, that was 2006.

So... let's just say... I don't really have a good track record as far as "good friends" goes. Maybe my metric for "friend" is a little too low. Ya think? Let me be clear, there were more events than just this, too. Yep. These are just the greatest hits.

The last time I talked to her... it was about 2 days after I spread my dog's ashes in the river we used to go play at. I was doing a hike and collecting stones, and I went to visit my dog's ashes. And some really skinny person was sitting further down the river, I walked close by and didn't notice her. I was talking to myself on the trail on the way down, so I was really embarrassed and kinda just kept walking when I saw her. It was her. I completely did not recognize her. When I knew her, even when I reconnected with her a few years prior in 2019... she had always been a bit overweight. Sometimes more than others, but you know. Just, always curvy. And this time she looked skeletal. Like I legit did not recognize her. And she just started pouring out horror stories. And it's giving me really creepy feelings just thinking about it, so I don't want to linger or relive that part. She was going to court for accessory to fentanyl trafficking across state lines, the same shit that killed a mutual friend. She had like 5 kids. She was homeless. She was in rehab, but was down by the river getting high like 2 days before a court case. And she flat-out told me, and I said "oh, well I guess weed is okay, right? Now that it's legal..." And she went, "Right... weed... hehe..." And I was just in my head going "why the fuck are you still standing here dude, fucking run away right now!" I have never hiked faster and more scared than my hike back from that spot to my car, with my hand in my pocket clutching my keys in case I needed to like stab her like she was a zombie or some shit. Fuck, it's just haunting.

She called me. As I was getting my socks and shoes on to get my Chili's delivery. And I picked up. And she went, "Hey, it's ____. I'm stuck in ______ (the town I just moved from) and it's freezing cold and I'm just trying to get to my mom's house." And I just went, "I'm sorry, I don't live in the area anymore, and I don't really know anyone in the area." She asked where I moved to, I considered lying. I probably should have. But I told her I'm upstate. I told her sorry I couldn't help and we said goodbye. It had huge "I'm just calling you because I need something" vibes. A feeling that was a bit too familiar, and really just raised a lot of red flags, so I tried to just take a mental note on what that feeling was. I immediately went to block the number, but instead saved it as "WARNING - (HER NAME)" I couldn't bring myself to block it. I'll unpack that another time.

Then I took some really deep breaths and tried to shake it off, put my shoes on and... she called me again. And I just held the phone in my hand and watched it ring out. Then she called again. And I did the same. And I'm legit just standing by my door with my phone vibrating in my hand and just going "oh my god, I just want to get my dinner." And a literal homeless drug addict is speed dialing me because they can't find a ride. What does she expect me to do? Call my elderly parents and have them give her a ride? I don't know anyone in that town that would give me a ride. If I were her, I would call the cops and explain the situation, see if they have any suggestions, dispatch was always really nice to me. Maybe they would know what to do. I can't save you, and I really can't keep having the guilt of that being thrown on my lap.

The more I look back at my trainwreck of a social life... the more I go... "yeah, no shit, no wonder I'm terrified to meet new people, I'm obviously really fucking bad at picking friends." Why? Well... I guess because I don't pick them. I just take whoever gravitates towards me. And I try really hard to see the best in all people. The best I can. I don't wanna get into that too deep right now, but it does concern me in meeting new people. That I might not be able to tell if I'm around someone bad until it's too late, because historically that has been the case pretty much across the board. I don't know if it's a PTSD thing? Or a neurodivergent thing? Or a developmental thing? Or maybe a combination of all of them? But it destroyed my entire life. I am a creative, and creatives only thrive with a supportive community. And my community consisted of people who were basically just using me for whatever they needed (taking) and kinda just not even really acknowledging that I had needs at all. They sure didn't seem very interested in the things I made, or what I was doing with my life, what my goals were, any of that. So, career-wise. Doomed. Emotional support for a super emotional person? Doomed.

It scares me. I get to a point where I start to wonder if this kind of person is all that's out there. Self-centered, self-indulgent, prideful, sinful people. Lustful, overconsuming, greedy, apathetic, angry, jealous, hubristic people. And that whole black-and-white thinking, absolutism, "everyone might be like this so better play it safe and never leave your house" shit. That's a big-ass component of PTSD. And that shit got set off pretty hard today. Well, this week. Majorly. And today with those phone calls especially. So... I think I'm gonna be gentle with myself right now about the fact that it's 5:15 and I still haven't even taken my contacts out.

I'm just gonna say this. I would really, really, really just like. A break. Just... a break. Some good stuff. Some good news. "Hey, you've been going through some shit so I decided to help you figure out getting new furniture to your new apartment." Fuck man, you know what. I'd literally chop off half my fingers to just curl up in a giant beanbag chair with someone I felt completely comfortable with and just binge-watch a TV series. That's like, an actual dream for me right now. Like... I would take that over meaningless sex literally any day, and I mean that. Or like... sitting on the floor on pillows in front of a fireplace and drinking tea and sharing happy stories. So, if you have access to these things, please don't take them for granted. Because someday they might not be there. And I can say, as someone who has been in that trench most of my life. It's a dark, lonely place.

Good god this is an insanely depressing post! I pledged to try to find good vibes at the end. Here's something. Two things actually. I wrapped the bloodstone. It's not... great... Like I don't think it's super impressive, it's kinda plain, but I got it done and I'm happy with it. And I started to clean up one of the opal pieces and I'm like 90% sure it's real. I have no idea how I'm going to cut it, because I didn't really understand how opal works... the color comes from refracting light, right? So the more different angles (facets) I have cut into it, the more it should scatter light and do that... opalescent effect... right? I think that should be how it works. Because now that I'm cutting the matrix stone off of it, it's actually looking kinda... transparent. So I'm guessing the matrix just bounced the light around to amplify the effect. So... I don't know, I'll have to do a test piece or do some more googling tomorrow or something. It's an interesting concept. But raw, legit opal is so. fucking. beautiful. It's really cool. By far the coolest stone I have in my collection. So that's a good vibe, in my book.

Rest for me now, hopefully. I started to get that "I'm not safe" feeling again. Good thing I have weird occult protection symbols drawn all over the apartment. I figure if you put symbols from every culture and spiritual belief system, at least one of them has gotta work! XD Thank you for sharing my burdens, if you got this far. No matter how many of these hurt, angry, sad, hungry people are out there... no matter how much I get kicked down or taken advantage of. I will never let it snuff out the light inside me. And I will shine that light, of peace and love and hope, the best I can. And I'll be looking out my window every night until I see that light shine back.

#diary #journal #online journal #stream of consciousness #stream of thoughts

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somethinginthethunder · 2 years

Text

MY THOUGHTS ON THE ENCANTO LGBTQ+ CONVERSATION:

hello :)) guess who is supposed to be asleep so they can be well rested for their spanish exam tomorrow but decided a fictional movie controvery was more important :)))

to preface this:

-i'm an LGBTQ+ asian immigrant. and although i don't share the same ethnicity as those of encanto, i'd like to think we have some similarities

-do NOT argue or put each other down over this. the reason why we have these conversations is that so we can understand each other, not to be right.

-if i say something offensive or that you disagree with, lmk and we can talk abt it! maybe we'll come to realizing more than before! just be respectful please

alright, that's it!

1. `white people/whiteness`

as i read a lot about people's arguments i tend to see a lot of it put on white people. while i agree that they typically experience things differently than us, i think it's also important to understand that it can come from poc, too. i am in no way shape or form trying to shift the blame, but leaving others out of the bubble makes it seem like we're untouchable when it comes to biases.

the truth is, though, we're susceptible to it, too. depending on your culture, you've probably got a little bit of internalized discrimination in you. i'll be honest, i thought the trans!luisa idea was okay until people pointed out how it's problematic. maybe it's surprising because i'm a part of the LGBTQ+ and an avid supporter of it, but there's still things we need to unlearn even after joining the community.

2. `why people are placing these hcs on encanto`

i think the reason why people enjoy this movie so much is because it is incredibly different from other big disney movies. it de-villainized green, has musical-like choreography, lacks the typical disney princess voice in the lead role, and has much smaller stakes. what it also has, though, are characters represented in a modern way who people relate to.

i think on one hand people hc isa as a lesbian because she didn't like mariano, and on the other people hc her as a lesbian because they see themselves in her.

i think people did this to almost all the characters; mirabel, camilo, etc.

and there's nothing wrong with lgbtq+ hcs! but the intent behind it can matter a lot. if it comes out of seeing yourself in the character and basing it off of you, then i think that's understandable unless it's somehow inappropriate. but when you're placing hcs on characters based off of stereotypes and stereotypes alone, it'll get problematic.

so, if camilo is genderfluid to you because you are as well and would like to be him, then okay. if mirabel resonates with you so much that you see yourself in her and also happen to be enby, then alright.

3. `putting down lgbtq+ hcs in general`

this obviously does not apply to everyone critiquing hcs, but i think there are things worth saying here.

telling people "not everything has to be gay" or saying lgbtq+ hc-ers are just shoving gay wherever they can sometimes feels a little insensitive. people (who are within the community) usually use these hcs because there isn't much big stuff out there that specifically labels and actively represents them as such. if you get incredibly bothered by even one lgbtq+ hc, then kindly check yourself.

anyway im tired and i want to sleep so i'll probably add to this or delete this in the morning depending on whether i find it dumb and incomprehensive or articulate and understandable when i reread this in the morning.

night, folks!

#encanto #encanto x reader #camilo madrigal #camilo madrigal x reader #mirabel madrigal #mirabel madrigal x reader #luisa madrigal #luisa madrigal x reader #isabela madrigal #isabela madrigal x reader

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hamliet · 2 years

Note

I don't know if you're willing to open up this can of worms again, but aren't Isayama's infamous tweet and blog post at this point like 8/12 years old?

I'm saying this because people *still* consistently bring them up.

And as far as I know nothing else has been dug up? (I've been really looking for stuff and nobody really seems to be able to bring up anything else.)

Not that them being old makes them okay, but I feel like consistency is the key to understanding 'problematic' people.

J. K. Rowling just can't seem to shut the fuck up, your average creepy and wierd streamer dude just can't seem to shut the fuck up.

Companies with shitty work environments and their presidents just can't seem to be able to shut the fuck up.

I think I get the feeling Isayama can at least shut the fuck up.

Idk maybe we get some big crazy news tomorrow about how he's put all of his money into right wing shit or something, but as far as I know he's just planning to build a spa and maybe never draw manga again, right?

He did some philantrophy by auctioning off a sketch for AIDS orphans, I believe?

He also clarified Eren's genocide is supposed to be wrong?

I mean that's what I've found, I'm not even sure how many of these are true.

I'm just curious if anything else has cropped up/if you know.

But I also want to be careful about unnecessary praise.

So I am gonna answer this, but then don't really want more arguments, so asks arguing will be deleted (not on you Anon! This ask is fine, I just don't wanna get into it today).

Here's the thing about the internet: things never go away, and because things are still up, they're timeless. Ish. Even if they have been deleted.

Yeah, these comments are very old. I do genuinely get, however, because of what Japan did in WWII, why people who are directly affected in terms of their families (colonization like... doesn't just end) are not able to move past that. They don't have to. The effects are still felt today. No one has to forgive or move beyond it. I caution against telling people they need to move on from a comment supporting one of the men who participating in the abuse, even if the comment was not about the abuse. People are allowed to talk about their hurt and suspicion. I'll never say they can't.

That said, yes, it's entirely possible Isayama has learned more and realized by now. I hope he has. My guess would be that he has.

And that said, I would like to see each and every westerner who screams about the blog post specifically take a good long look at whether they've ever said good things about any of the founding fathers of America, who like owned slaves, or about other people revered in their country because I sure as hell want to tell you that none of us are innocent in this. None. Zero.

People are raised with different perspectives, and part of growing up means reexamining them. People, even historical people, are complex, and can have done great good and great evil (not saying this dude did any good; I don't know much about him).

Actually, y'know what, Americans should take a damn good look at Unit 731, and maybe have a "hmm" moment about why we as Americans never learn about Unit 731 in school. Like, it's not in any US textbooks. Could it be because the US, as much as we held the Nuremberg Trials for justice for the Holocaust, actually helped Japan get away with Unit 731 and the abuses in Manchuria because we got something out of it? (Spoilers: yes. We helped them get away with it in exchange for information gained from horrific human experiments.)

Maybe even take a look at Winston Churchill, a figure I've always had positive feelings about in history, been raised to revere, and then when once conversing with a Japanese friend, I told a funny story about how someone in my office used a lot of quotes from Churchill to encourage us during the pandemic. My friend, who is a wonderfully kind person, gave me a strange look, and then I realized that someone from a country that had been hit with two nuclear bombs might have a slightly different perspective on officials who authorized it.

The Holocaust allusion is the other Big Thing in SnK and is indefensible. The funny thing is I always get accused of defending this when I've always said it's indefensible and a terrible oversight, just because I don't believe the story is fascist and think it was unconscious rather than an act of conscious bigotry. Not that that makes it excusable or better, because it doesn't, and people can hate the work for that and talk about their hurt all they want. But enjoying the story doesn't inherently make someone bigoted (many Jewish people have spoken out about their love of it; they are just as valid as those offended). Yes, it's privilege sometimes to be able to ignore some things and not others, but... what goes into that is complicated.

We are all limited by our perspectives. If people who say you can't enjoy Harry Potter nowadays because you're financially benefitting Rowling have never or will never again buy chocolate from Nestle or Hershey (which use child slaves), then they can talk. Until then, focus on the planks in your own eyes (I completely get why many people will never enjoy HP again and support them in doing so, even if I continue to derive hope from the stories while acknowledging critique, and I know trans people on both perspectives who are all valid). Everyone has their own limits and compromises. It's important to be aware of them, yes, and to keep pushing for a better world and growing, but no one's getting through this earth pure. It's hard to say this without it sounding like an excuse. Maybe it is. I don't mean it to be. I don't know. I just know that I've never read another story that captures the grief of losing a parent in a way that speaks to me with such comfort like HP did.

Ideals and practice are not always the same thing; we're stumbling through a broken world on broken legs with a broken map. Let's look at the lighthouse (ideals) to chart our courses, and use our broken tools to haul ourselves forward, not focus on telling others their tools are bad. People screaming "you're a bad person if you ignore X!" are in sore need of a mirror. We should all work on ourselves.

#ask hamliet #snk #discourse #isayama hajime #tw #i want to use specific tw but tumblr won't let me will it

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armageddontyoudare · 3 years

Text

The original was accidentally deleted by my stupid ass but here's me, attempting to recreate it. Requester(is that a word?) is @winterszsoldier , thanks for requesting! Also, blushie baby Oliver to make your day!!

Oliver sipped some tea as he flipped through the channels on TV, looking for something good. After a while, he decided on The Ellen Show and chuckled when he saw his friend and costar, Y/n L/n in the hot seat.

Y/n seemed uncomfortable in her own skin as she sat in front of Ellen, a live audience staring at her, as well as the camera that recorded her every move. Nevertheless, she put a smile on her face.

"So, Y/N L/N, excited for the release of your newest movie? I heard the actor opposite you is quite the man." Ellen winked.

Y/n chuckled. "Yes, I am quite excited, and yes, Oliver is a delightful man."

"Now, one of your fans recently asked what your favourite TV show is. Would you be so kind as to give them an answer?" Ellen smiled.

She thought for a bit. "Well, it has to be either 911 or Into the Badlands. Why? Both are quite gripping and fascinating." Y/n decided. "I've actually rewatched 911 thrice!" The actress chuckled.

Ellen laughed. "Maybe you can't get enough of a certain character." She joked.

"Well, I am quite fond of Evan Buckley. Oliver is a massively talented actor." She smiled.

"If I'm not wrong, you and Oliver are quite close too, right?" Ellen questioned.

"Well, yeah. I was an extra in Into the Badlands, which was in 2015, we just did a movie this year in 2021 and we've always stayed in contact. I love Oliver a lot and working with him is always an amazing experience. He's a ridiculously talented and attractive man." She blushed a tiny bit.

Oliver blushed. It was always nice to be appreciated, especially by a close colleague.

"Sounds to me like someone has a big fat crush on Oliver Stark!" Ellen laughed.

Oliver spat out his tea in shock.

Y/n spat out her water in shock.

"A crush? On Oliver? Oh, Ellen, don't be so silly! I do adore him, but as a close colleague." Y/n was blushing like crazy now.

"Oh, darling your blushing face says otherwise!" Ellen chuckled.

Y/n buried her face in her hands, hoping and praying Oliver didn't decide to watch the Ellen Show tonight.

Oliver was also blushing like an idiot. He had actually developed a crush on his beautiful costar during the shooting of their new movie.

"Now that the cat's out of the bag, let's talk about your newest movie with said ridiculously talented and attractive young man." Ellen winked.

Oliver picked up his phone, which was buzzing with notifications from Twitter and Instagram.

There were clips and mentions of Y/n's interview all over his feed, as well as posts from their shippers, who had grown to adore the two young actors and their chemistry.

Oliver's eyes widened. He looked up to see the interview wrapping up, so he decided to take a leap of faith and texted Y/n to ask her out.

Oliver: Hey, Y/n, just wondering if you're free for coffee tomorrow morning.

She texted back almost immediately.

Y/n: You saw the interview, didn't you?

Oliver decided to play dumb. Y/n was not having it.

Oliver: Interview? What interview? You had an interview?

Y/n: ...

Oliver: Okay, yes, I saw your Ellen interview. Anyways, coffee?

Y/n blinked. She let herself hope that he was asking her out.

Y/n: Name the time and place, I'll be there.

Oliver: It's a date!

Oliver hastily sent another message.

Oliver: Well, only if you want it to be.....

Y/n chuckled as she got into her car.

Y/n: It's a date ;)

#911 fox #911 on fox #911 show #oliver stark #oliver stark x reader #oliver Stark x you #oliver stark x y/n #ellenshow

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mmilkbreadd · 3 years

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Chapter twenty three: “Bokuto Hates Goodbyes”

Masterpost - Prev - Next.

Warning(s): post-timeskip manga spoilers!!

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“Tendou is going to quit volleyball after graduating. He wants to go to Paris to work as a chocolatier” you said, never taking your eyes off him. You sighed again, trying to find the words to tell him. Bokuto noticed your pause and smiled at you waiting for you to reply. “And I... I'm going with him.”

Koutarou's smile faded, along with the hope in his heart.

Silence took over the atmosphere. You were trying to look at Bokuto, but he kept his gaze on the snowy ground. Neither of you had opened your mouths to say anything. Maybe because the correct words did not exist to express what you were feeling at that moment; you, remorse, and Bokuto didn't even know what to feel. Sadness, melancholy, happiness because you are going to fulfill your dream... fear of being forgotten.

So many things to say, feel, live.

“Why?” he asked, still with his gaze on the floor.

“Why…?” you lashed several times. “Because I want to be a baker, fulfill my dream and my grandmother's... It's what I want, Kou.”

Koutarou started to shake his head from side to side, his hands over his hair.

“Yes I know, but Paris?” Bokuto looked at you for the first time, his eyes filling with tears. “That's like a million miles away!”

The snow kept falling on you two and the cold seemed to increase, but neither appeared to notice. The moment seemed eternal: Bokuto's tears that still did not come out, the imminent farewell, the silence that still continued ...

“We can continue to be friends, Koutarou, you shouldn't worry” the Owl turned to the opposite side of the school, and started walking away quickly. “Bokuto! Bokuto!” there was still no response on his part. “Koutarou, wait!”

Even though in his mind Bokuto had planned not to return, hearing his name come out of your mouth once more, he stopped short. He quickly turned to see you, your nose was red from the cold, and smoke came out every time you spoke when you apologized to him.”

“I don't want to be friends” shouted Bokuto looking straight into your eyes, with a tear rolling on his cheek. “I do not want you to go! W-we're just getting to know each other! It's not fair.”

Bokuto pouted while still staring at you.

“We still have time, I won't be leaving for another month,” you said, but you knew it wasn't enough time. Not even a thousand years would be. “We'll talk on the phone!”

Promises that were very difficult to keep. Even if you wanted to, with the exams that would be shortly, and then in the cooking academy, it would be impossible to maintain much contact. You didn't know if you could even keep it with Emiko and Wakatoshi.

“Don't say things that later won't be true,” Bokuto said for the last time, wiping the tears that fell from his eyes. “Bye, y/n.”

And in a last act of desperation, you grabbed Koutarou by the wrist and then grabbed his coat tightly, then brought your lips together with his.

After a few seconds, the light of a flash interrupted you.

“I'm sorry?” Emiko said with a nervous little smile. She had taken a picture of you kissing, and now she was slowly walking away so she could escape your creepy gaze. “I better go, haha. Byeee.”

Again the silence had taken over the environment. But this time, Bokuto's face was completely changed. His cheeks were flushed and he had a big smile on his lips.

“You like me too?” he asked suddenly.

And even though you were speechless, you were able to whisper a little “yes”. Bokuto without warning held you with his arms, hugging you, and then started jumping up and down several times.

“Wait, we were fighting two minutes ago,” he said, making an angry face, but then his true colors showed and he started laughing. “Hey Hey hey! It no longer matters, we must take advantage of every second. Get ready, y/n, I'll come tomorrow at nine in the morning! Well maybe not that early, but I'll come before lunch!”

And here was another example where you could see the captain of Fukurodani change his mood quickly.

You said goodbye and you entered the academy again, thinking about how to assassinate Emiko.

Tomorrow would be the last day you would see Bokuto in a long time.

And maybe forever.

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Just as Koutarou had said the night before, at eleven in the morning he was at Shiratorizawa's gate, waiting for you to come out. It was not as early as he would have liked, but he had also arrived very late at the hotel, so he needed to sleep as well. Even though you were already walking towards the exit, two people arrived before you.

“Hello, Bokuto-san,” Tendou greeted. “Let's get straight to the point, what are your intentions with the little y/n? Ushijima and I are not very convinced that you go out with her so often. You were too late last night, and now it's too early. I hope you are not doing strange things out there. This is not Tokyo, my friend.”

“He is not your friend, Tendou” Ushijima said in a whisper, with his deep voice.

“I know, best friend, but I want to intimidate him” Satori whispered back, but he didn't realize that Bokuto had heard everything.

In the distance, you came walking next to Emiko. You had already forgiven her for last night's photo, although she still hadn't deleted it from Twitter, and had even put it as your profile picture for a few hours until you noticed and took it out. You can tell that Tsukasa almost ran out of roommates.

“Hey, aren't those Satori and Wakatoshi talking to your boyfriend?” She asked you, pointing to your friends and the one who wasn't your boyfriend really.

“I'm going to kill them.”

You sped up your pace to get there as quickly as possible and avoid disaster before it happens. But to your surprise, when you got to where the three of them were, all you could hear was laughter. Yes, even Ushijima.

“What is happening here?” you asked, raising an eyebrow at Satori, who you thought was responsible for this situation. And as always, you were right.

“Oh, nothing, y/n. Just old friends remembering old times” said Tendou with a rather forced laugh. Then, Ushijima and Bokuto also began to laugh out loud, while Koutarou made a danger signal with his eyes, and Emiko watched the situation in disbelief.

“I think Koutarou and I should go now” and before any of your friends could say anything, you grabbed him by the sleeve of his jacket and trotted off to Miyagi's main park.

Behind you, you could hear Tendou's screams calling for you to come back, but you ignored them and kept walking quickly in front of Bokuto.

Arriving at the park you could see several children with their parents playing in the snow, despite not having snowed today, there was still a little snow on the trees and grass.

“Thanks for saving me, things were getting ugly there,” he said as he took your hand that was on his sleeve, to be holding hands normally. “I have bad news.”

More bad news? You didn't think you were going to be able to endure another misfortune this weekend. It seems that Bokuto noticed your desperate face and squeezed your hand tightly to encourage you.

“They have suspended my bus for tomorrow, they say there will be a snowstorm in the afternoon so they have changed the schedule.” Nothing went right for tragic volleyball lovers. “I'm leaving tonight, so we can't see each other tomorrow.”

The world fell at your feet. How could everything go wrong for you? A lot of drama has existed lately.

“And now what?” you asked him.

“We live in the moment!” and without saying anything else, Bokuto started to run towards the ice skating rink, never letting go of your hand.

The ice was full of small children, who watched Koutarou every time he made a few meters and fell letting out a scream. The kids laughed at the Owl's exaggeration, causing him to make it even more dramatic to obtain more laughter. Every time you fell, Bokuto would rush to get up and ask you if you were okay, even if you were laughing at yourself and had not suffered any injuries.

After skating for half an hour or so, you decided to go for lunch because it was already quite late. You went to the same cafeteria that you had gone to the day before, and you ordered something warm since today's temperature was even colder than yesterday’s.

At the end of lunch, Bokuto asked you to show him around the city, although there was not much to show as it was quite small compared to Tokyo. You showed him where Karasuno High was, but you didn't go there since it was relatively far from where you were. He took several photos and sent them to Akaashi, and then to his mother.

The hours passed quickly, reaching the time of curfew, which meant that you had to go back to school, and Bokuto to his hotel to find his bags and go to the station. Unfortunately, you could not accompany him before his bus leaves.

“It's time to say goodbye,” you told him once at the entrance of the academy. "Thanks for coming to visit me, Kou.”

Before saying something to you, Bokuto put his arms around you. This time neither of you were crying, nor were sad. You were happy for the time you spent together.

“Goodbye, y/n, I'm going to miss you” and with a lot of bravery in his heart, Koutarou brought his lips to yours one last time.

“I promise to call you.”

And so, Bokuto Koutarou said goodbye with a sad smile, knowing that that promise was nothing more than an empty promise.

And that at the end of all, it would not be kept.

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A/N: I know Bokuto’s hair isn’t exactly accurate in the photo but it was the best image I could find😩😩 sorryy

Btw who wouldn’t leave everything behind to go to Paris with Tendou Satori? I wouldn’t even think about it, my bags are ready!

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#bokuto x reader #bokuto #haikyuu #haikyuu!!#haikyuu x reader #tendou #ushijima #akaashi #bokuto smau #haikyuu smau

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duskwoodgirl4life · 1 year

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Jake's Insecurities