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crabonfire · 1 year

Note

Hello! Could you do the mercs reactions to an S/O that picks them up bridal/princess style with ease? If you don’t want to that’s fine, either way I hope you have a nice day!

(Sorry if the English is bad, it’s not my first language)

S/O carrying mercs w ease

PLEASE this is so me I carry my friends a lot haha 🙏‼️

character: all mercs

note: it's okay bro, English ain't my first language either (non English speakers we 🆙️)

s/o body isn't mentioned but they are not skinny, they have muscle, you can imagine to be athletic, chubby, strong or buff, whatever!!

also this is shorter than most of my work I'm sorry,,, I hope its still good!!

reblogs are greatly appreciated!

warnings: none

♡Scout♡

• oh!

• honestly very embarrassed? cause he wanted to be the "strong" one. (LMFAOAOAOAOOAA)

• "I can walk, ya know."

"Scout, your injured..."

"...How are you so strong??"

"Hm? I wouldn't say I'm strong...your just pretty light."

"Oh."

• has mixed feelings about it. how. what. when did you learn to do this.

• does he think it's incredibly attractive? Yes. Is he jealous? YES???

like what..h...huh..

• he does end up loving it though, like, sets his envy and toxic masculinity aside because...its nice to be carried. Makes him feel safe.

• if the others tease him for being carried he gets embarrassed the first couple times and tells you to drop him. But then he learns to not give a fuck, because its so comforting when he lies his head on your chest as you carry him around.

"Yeah yeah, your all just jealous that I got somebody that'll hold me, ya sad fucks!" He'd snicker, melting in your arms.

♡Pyro♡

• wants to be carried by you all the time.

• so shocked the first time you swooped them up happily and swung them around bridal style, they were so happy. squealing and clapping, chuckling to themselves as you walk with them in your arms.

• also wow ur so strong!!!!!! my god

• sometimes, pi pretends to fall asleep while they cuddle with you, so in the end when it's time to sleep for tomorrow, you carry them in your arms while you both head to your room, tucking them in and then going in after them. They're awake, but it's just nice and comforting when you show such affection.

• thinks it's super cool. like ur so sweet and so strong and that's honestly so hot lkke I'm sorry hello

"Mmmfh mmfh.." [Hubba hubba..] They'd mutter, wrapping their hands around your neck as they swoon at you.

"Pff-"

♡Soldier♡

• uh...umm...uhhhdh...

• "..."

"Soldier? You okay? You're really quiet."

"...yes."

"Yea?"

"yes."

No. He is not.

His face is red, he keeps staring at you wide eyed as you carry him out of the battlefield with his broken leg. He's sweating profusely, but you think it's just because of the fight. It was not.

• It's the most attractive thing in the world to him when you show such strength, such will to be able to carry a burly man like him. Imagine how strong you are. That's, like...really cool.

• tells demoman about it with a red face and a shaky voice, and he has to pat his back with a laugh, telling him that you two are meant to be.

• maybe...you can carry him again...if...he's hurt...again..maybe.

hurts himself on "accident" so you can carry him.

"Jane, again? How'd you fall down the stairs twice?"

"THOSE STAIRS WERE NOT MADE BY TRUE AMERICAN HANDS, FOR THEY HAVE DENIED ME THE PRIVILIGE TO WALK!"

"...Okay."

He grins widely whenever you carry him bridal style, he's thankful his helmet hides a part of his face because he's flushed and staring at you the entire time. Bro is enamored. Bro finds you absolutely majestic. Bro finds you infinite.

♡Demo♡

• first time you carried him he was drunk, you carried him bridal style cause he was knocked out cold.

he awoke in the middle, seeing your majestic face as you carry him in the middle of the streets with a pout, trying to get back to base.

he thinks he's woken up in heaven, you look so cute.

Then he realizes he's being carried, he looks at his scrumpy in hand, then back to you, and just convinces himself this is a drunk dream he's having.

"...Wow...yer very strong... hic "

"Thank you Tavish."

The walk back is just him complimenting and gushing over you with a grin, drooling over you (literally it was a little gross)

"Yer so hot."

"?? Thank you Tavish?"

"So cool...I dunnae why yer datin' me..."

"Demo, don't say that."

"What?? It's true.. hic yer carryin' me thru the streets past midnight, I don't deserve ye."

You sigh, "You deserve me, don't talk like that okay?" The conversation continues sweetly.

When you two got back, he woke up and was still convinced it was a really sweet dream he had.

But then the second time you carried him wow okay this is real.

"Yer so strong. I never knew ye could do this."

"Haha, you've said that already Tav."

"Yeah...I know."

He's so?? Like?? Into it. It made something grow in him. Carry him like that? He'll do whatever you want.

♡Heavy♡

• WHAT

• WHAT DID YOUR PARENTS FEED YOU?

• what fucking protein powder do you chug to get this fucking strong bro

• do you deadlift 200? Huh? You..you bench 150? Fucking maniac

• he actually convinces himself that he's died and went to heaven the moment when you carry him out from the battlefield, dropping him over to the Medic to get healed. But he's stiff as a board, not responding to medics cry for help.

Even medic is a little shocked. A lot actually what the FUCK DID YOU EAT?

• he snaps out of it, continuing to shred people

• but after battle he walks up to you, with furrowed eyebrows and stiff hands.

"How did you carry me?"

"HUH?"

"In battle. I was hurt. You carried me. How?"

"Oh, uh...I don't know. It was a spur of the moment, I usually don't carry people."

"Spur of moment? You mean to say you don't do this?"

"No! That was my first time carrying anybody in a while."

"..."

"Heavy?"

"..Give me a moment."

He walks over to sit at the bench, hands in fists as he looks at the floor looking both proud and defeated. How the fuck.

• finds it attractive! Duh!!!!!

• having such a strong partner makes him have so proud and happy, talks about you to his family and swoons about your strength. Its so corny, he's fangirling.

♡Engie♡

• 😯😲🥴😊😍😏

• kiss him please.

• the fucking, expression on his face the moment you carried him up from his chair, placing him above your shoulder like a sack of potatoes and carrying him outside. Bros face was so red, bro transformed into the red power rangers.

• what the FUCK s/o.

•"D-Darlin' what are you doin'-"

"Engie you've been cooped up in that damn room too long, I'm taking you out."

Any merc walking by and watching gives him a thumbs up, muttering "nice." As they grin at him.

Genuinely questions how strong you are. He has a heavy, robotic arm so he's not a light man. (Plus he's chubbbyyy and I love him tummy and I wanna eat it mmm yummmm!! sorry ill stop)

wow s/o that's so rude you can't just carry him without asking like that (please please do this more often he's so into it)

The strength you have is such a mood booster? Like Heavy he gushes over you with strangers and friends like you're a Greek god.

• also feels comforted to be held bridal style like haha wow yes please

♡Medic♡

• I don't even have to tell you because you know what I'm gonna say

• of course he's into it.

• enamored, gushing, swooning, fangirling, screaming, hitting the wall, dying

• carrying him as he's half asleep from his medbay to his room woke him up, staring at you with wide eyes and a grin, his cheeks flushed a bit red as he laughs. "Mein gott, your strong!"

• bro is not a twink I get physically sick when people call him one, so if you can carry him that it quite impressive.

• idk how to write this without making it sound like he's thirsting over u I'm sorry um... he just really likes it and finds your strength an admirable trait about you.

Makes you carry heavy things and uses the excuse that he's too weak to carry jt himself so he can watch your muscles do they thing 😭🙏

♡Sniper♡

• oh. okay.

• yeah. mhm. cool.

• it's like he's fallen for you all over again

• he's quiet, hands awkwardly lying on his own lap as you carry him bridal style, smiling to yourself. His hat is covering his face fortunately for him, so you can't see his shy smile and his pink cheeks.

"Cmon Snipes, we gotta go out its a good day today!"

"Yeah sure. Whatever..."

Like demo, carry him like that he's gonna say yes to anything you tell him. He's honestly not paying attention.

• I feel like all these men are really into the strength of a person, especially snipes. Not only is it an admirable thing to have, but like I said, it's attractive. Does not like to be carried like a sack of potatoes but if you ever carry him bridal style or in a holding position he's gonna melt. Whatever bad mood he's had will slowly fade.

You'd carry him infront of you, a worried expression on your face. "What's wrong mundy? You seem so upset today." With that doting voice of yours...his heart feels like its going to explode, his bad mood lifted, he smiles at you with a sigh. "Nothin'. Just missed you."

♡Spy♡

• yeah

• dude idk what u expect he's a lanky man so of course when his partner carries him he's gonna be swooned

• top 10 ways to swoon the spy:

1. Carry the spy

• works like a charm, if he's being a tease or a little bitch all you gotta do is carry him, arms holding his hips with a smile on your face and he'll fold.

• first time you carried him he couldn't face you for the whole day, he found it the most attractive thing in the world but at the same time oh boy for once he's the flustered one.

• "I did not know you had such strength."

"Hah, I don't even need to use any of my strength. Your built like a stick, Spy."

"Fifth grader insults, that's low, especially for you Mon amour."

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comradekatara · 7 months

Note

Here's a completely random ask for you: what holiday (halloween, valentine's day, national ice cream day, etc.) would each member of the Gaang feel unreasonably strongly about? Can be positive or negative feelings.

oh this is a good question! (i hate so many american commercial holidays so this is a great avenue for me to project my frustrations with us capitalism onto these little guys. and to be clear im just doing us holidays bc otherwise there would simply be too many options and i’d be stuck here forever)

aang: he’s not enough of a hater to dislike any holidays. he’s a big fan of april fool’s day, valentine’s day, and halloween, because he appreciates fun and joy and love and merriment duh

katara: every thanksgiving she goes on an impassioned rant about the historical revisionism of the us empire deployed as a propaganda tool as it continues its genocidal imperialist project and the absolutely sick and twisted audacity of americans to celebrate a known lie in a mockery of the atrocities committed from the past into the present (this one may or may not just have been me, yesterday). every november-december she goes on an impassioned rant about the commercialism of christmas, and how it’s largely a fake holiday devised by capitalists to glorify the sanctity of the nuclear family, and how the supposed “secularization” of christmas is in fact a product of christian hegemony, it’s propaganda and you’re all falling for it because you crave hollow comforts in your cold and dismal life, and instead of attempting to look beyond the scraps you are given under capitalism you all just force yourselves to enjoy a facade of happiness and nostalgia because you refuse to admit that you’re fundamentally uncomfortable in your society!!!!!!!! (this is what i think but wisely refrain from saying because it’s not worth it. katara, however...) also she likes valentine’s day sometimes (depending on whether or not she has a boyfriend). she also has a lot to say on columbus day and the fourth of july of course, but this bullet point is already far too long.

sokka: his favorite holiday is pi day. he does not care for any other us holiday (but he has been known to enjoy a halloween here and there), but he specifically hates april fools because aang insists on pranking him every time, for some godforsaken reason. (he’s just so prankable!)

toph: her least favorite holiday is valentine’s day because it promotes m*rriage, one of her most hated institutions (it’s a long list). her favorite day is taco tuesday

zuko: he insists on celebrating shakespeare’s birth/deathday as if it is a real holiday that anyone actually cares about. and he gets offended when no one else cares. his least favorite holiday is the fourth of july, but not for any political reasons, it just has really bad vibes.

suki: she loves halloween because it has everything you could ever ask for in a single day: dressing in elaborate costume, eating so much candy, and getting really drunk. she’s also one of those people who gets really obnoxious on 4/20, at which point mai is like “you know it’s hitler’s birthday, right?” and immediately kills the vibe. just because she can :)

mai: she has a love/hate relationship with halloween, because theoretically it’s a celebration of the gothic, the liminal, the macabre, the ghostly. but in practice it’s just an excuse for everyone around her to get wasted. she hates christmas more though. santa freaks her out and cloying, forced cheer and merriment is unnerving and infuriating, actually.

ty lee: she dreads valentine’s day every year because she simply has too many suitors and it is very stressful. she likes april fool’s day because it gives her the opportunity to exercise her more devious inclinations. she can prank people so well they don’t even know they’re being pranked; on april first the world is her playground.

azula: she has no real opinion on any specific holidays. they’re petty distractions for mindless drones who require a modicum of frivolity here and there to spice up their otherwise dull, worthless lives. however, she quite likes tax day.

#bonus: yue’s favorite holiday is mid autumn festival <3 #lawful-chaos #asks #the gaang and #modern au #sorry for the katara rant in the middle of this post. it was thanksgiving yesterday. im hearing xmas music in stores. i couldn’t help myself #i should make a holiday tag #since a lot of these points are references to other similar posts ive made #okay:#holidays #if u go thru this tag you can find prev posts #instead of having to add bulky links to the post itself lmfao

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marblemoovt · 1 year

Text

Christmas Present - Simon Riley/Reader

Masterlist

Rating: Teen

Word Count: 6.6k

Warnings: Fluff with a smidge of hurt/comfort because of misunderstandings.

Summary:

After dating for three years, you get to finally spend a Christmas together with Simon. Things go sideways when he misunderstands your decision to grow your family.

------

You bounce on the balls of your feet. “I have a present for you.” Leaning close to Simon’s ear, you whisper, “you’re a father, now.” The poor man bluescreens on you. His eyes are wide and vacant. You run into the bedroom, your head peeking out the doorway with a grin before disappearing again. You present a wriggling Doberman puppy with a shiny red bow wrapped around its midsection. “Meet our baby!”

Simon is gone. Fuck.

Note:

Hello!! I am so happy I am finally done with this. I really wanted to get this finished in time for Christmas, but I failed to do that. Between work and procrastination, it's hard to get any writing done.

I hope this fluff heals all your souls as it did mine, consider it a belated holiday present :D

Happy Reading! ヾ(•ω•`)o

─── ⋆ ｡ﾟ☆: *. ☽ .* :☆ﾟ｡⋆ ───

Was it an impulsive decision? Completely. Was it more of a Christmas gift to yourself than to Simon? Definitely—but how could you resist those eyes?!?

Let’s backtrack a bit. It’s a few days before Christmas. You’re among the general population who do their shopping last minute. Simon isn’t due home until tomorrow, and you want to cook him something nice for dinner. The holiday season never fails to awaken your craving for cinnamon and sugar. You plan on making mince pies and gingerbread cookies for dessert. The cookies also double as a gift for a party that’s happening on Christmas.

It’s a small party with his coworkers and their families. You practically pestered poor Simon until he gave into your whims, which didn’t take much effort. He grumbled about wanting to stay home to cuddle with you in front of the fireplace, but you pointed out that he could do that at the party.

Simon will complain and exhibit his apparent allergy to large social settings, but you think he secretly enjoys it. He isn’t keen on interacting with people he’s unfamiliar with. But to exist in a room full of people he likes, who are having a good time… you always notice how his eyes soften.

That’s your take on it, anyway. Simon is difficult to read sometimes, especially when he’s spacing out. But you like staring into his eyes, deciphering the hidden meaning in their depths. You find the rich coffee colour gorgeous, and he always looks away when you remind him about it. It’s funny watching this giant man try to make himself appear small; he takes up too much space.

Your lips spread into a fond smile, and you adjust your clothes, the oversized hoodie swallowing your figure. The faint scent of bourbon and cedar still clings to the fabric, and you inhale deeply. Tomorrow. Twenty-four hours. Then you’ll be reunited with the man you love. Oddly enough, this will be your first Christmas together despite dating for three years. Simon was away on a mission for the other two, and a bouquet was always delivered to your doorstep on Christmas morning. The first one consisted of blue salvias, lavender, and forget-me-nots. The second bouquet had red salvias and white carnations. You pressed a few to keep in a scrapbook and dried the rest. The preserved bouquets are in a box you keep in the closet to protect them from the sunlight.

You grab the last item on your shopping list and head to the checkout. Once everything is packed in your car, you decide to warm up with a cup of hot chocolate. There’s a cafe nearby within walking distance. There also happens to be an animal shelter on the way. Sometimes you just can’t resist looking at all the animals, and you often have to force yourself to leave empty-handed.

But today feels different. Maybe it’s the holiday magic in the air, but when you reach the dog section, all the air is knocked from your lungs. In the first kennel is a small Doberman puppy. And her rich coffee eyes lock your limbs in place.

A worker notices your interest and walks up to you. “That’s Phantom. All her brothers and sisters have already left for new homes. She’s the smallest of the litter, and that seems to be the main reason no one has adopted her yet.” The puppy wags her little tail at the mention of her name. Your heart melts under the gaze of her eyes, which appear too large for her head.

“Because she’s smaller than her siblings?” you ask. It sounds silly to not adopt a dog based on appearance. Health concerns you could understand, but colour and size? Heck, you would be ecstatic to just have a dog. Although size could be significant depending on your living situation. But still, to not adopt this sweet pup because she’s too little is ridiculous.

The worker’s lips twist into a sad smile. “There are many reasons why people will overlook an animal, and they don’t always make sense.”

Your attention remains fixed on Phantom. Her brown eyes never leave your figure, observing you silently. “How long has she been here?” you ask. She still looks relatively young. You don’t think she’s even half a year old yet.

The worker shuffles through a clipboard hanging next to Phantom’s kennel. “We rescued her mother while she was still pregnant. Her whole life, it seems. The entire litter wasn’t available for adoption until two months ago.” They pause and glance at Phantom with furrowed brows. “Puppies normally get adopted quickly, but she hasn’t been lucky” The sentence sends a hollow pang in your heart that settles heavily in your gut.

“Could I meet her?” you whisper, the words constricting in your throat. You wet your chapped lips and haul yourself out of the deep chocolate ocean.

“Sure.” The door to the kennel is unlatched, and the metal hinges swing with a creak. Phantom sits there and watches you. Afraid to make sudden movements, your remain still and quiet your breathing. She stands up and pads slowly towards you. You crouch down and leave one hand, palm facing up, in front of you. As Phantom draws near, her nose twitches. She eyes you and nudges your hand with her snout. You grin at the wet, ticklish sensation and bite back a laugh. Slowly, you scratch the underside of her chin before moving down to her chest and back.

There’s a gentle woosh of wind, and this time you can’t hold in your delight any longer. A chuckle rumbles through your chest, and the sound of wind grows louder. Phantom licks your fingers and barks. It’s more like a tiny yip, and you are screaming on the inside.

“I think you’re coming home with me,” you mumble and pause. “How am I going to explain this to Simon?” You can picture the disapproving look on his face.

You fill out the adoption papers and exit the shelter with a very excited puppy. Forgetting about hot chocolate, you go to the pet store and buy the basic necessities for Phantom. When you get home, you manage to carry everything into the house while holding onto the leash. Fortunately, Phantom isn’t a puller. She walks beside you nicely and even moves out of the way to avoid the bags of groceries and presents. With great difficulty, you unlock the door and push the handle down with your elbow. You set the bags down and slip off your shoes, shutting the door with your foot.

Phantom immediately begins sniffing around, circling and tangling you with the leash. You laugh at her enthusiasm and reach down to unclip the leash from her harness. With the sudden removal of weight, Phantom bounds across the floor, bumping into furniture and smelling anything she can reach. It’s funny because she’s sniffing so intently that it’s audibly heard—loud too. Her nose twitches, and she buries her snout into a heap of fabric on the ground. One of his shirts you keep on the sofa as a little Simon blanket for when you binge-watch. It must have fallen when you dozed off last night. You accidentally skipped two seasons because the autoplay didn’t stop.

“Let’s find a spot to put your bed.” You grab the circular, foam dog bed and head towards the bedroom. Phantom trails behind you with the shirt sleeve between her jaws. You chuckle and hold the rest so it doesn’t drag across the floor. She doesn’t let go, and it turns into a leash of sorts. The master bedroom has a King size bed. A big bed for your big man. Phantom could definitely fit on it, but you don’t want her to develop a habit of sleeping there until you check that Simon is ok with it. He doesn’t like to share, especially when he has to share you. You place the dog bed next to the bedside drawer. Close enough that Phantom won’t feel left out, but far away enough that she won’t get stepped on in the morning in case you or Simon forget.

She tugs the shirt with her toward her new bed. You let go, and it falls in a heap and buries the puppy. “Simon blankets are comfortable, aren’t they?” you ask. She lets out a small ‘woof’ and wiggles her head out from underneath. Your smile stretches wide. “Let’s get the rest of your things sorted.” And so you spend the rest of the evening storing toys, placing bowls, everything you could think of when one adopts a puppy. Phantom keeps you company and entertains you with her silly antics. She’s already picked a favourite out of all the toys you bought her, and you silently squeal that night when she curls up in bed with it. You snap a picture, fingers itching to send it to Simon. But you’re not quite ready for his wrath yet.

In the morning, you awake to scratching and whimpering. You bolt upwards, eyes darting around the room before landing on Phantom at the door. Stumbling out of bed, you rub your eyes and shuffle to the backyard door. Phantom trots outside and sniffs around before settling in a corner to pee. You lean against the doorway and watch as she continues to explore, wrapping your arms around yourself. The familiar cacophony of twitters and chirps starts up. Phantom pauses and tilts her head at the bird feeders set up in the old oak tree. She doesn’t bark but observes silently.

“You’re a lot quieter than I was expecting,” you mumble. At your whistle, Phantom glances one more time at the birds before heading back inside. “Did you have fun?” Her tail thumps against your calves. You turn into the kitchen and measure out some puppy kibble for Phantom.

Once she starts eating, you make breakfast for yourself. A simple toast with butter and a fried egg. As the egg is cooking, your phone buzzes against the counter. You jump a little, and even the crunching of kibble pauses for a few seconds before resuming. Glancing at the screen, you see the notification is a text message. The skull emoji sends you grappling for your phone.

Simon💀: ETA 3 hours from now. Have you eaten yet, poppet?

You bite your lip and grin. Can’t he just say what he means? Your thumbs fly across the screen as you type your reply.

Poppet🧸: I’m cooking breakfast now. Do you want me to pick you up from the airport?

You hit send and attach a picture of the stovetop. The egg is nearly done, so you turn off the heat, and the toaster clicks a beat later. Your phone tickles your hand, and you eagerly read Simon’s response.

Simon💀: You got the appetite of a mouse. And negative. I can take a taxi.

You chuckle and make a mental note to look for the car keys later.

Poppet🧸: Ok, I’ll pick you up in 3 hours.

Then you put your phone in silent mode and place it on the counter screen-down. You grab a plate from the cupboards and transfer the finished egg. Rummaging through the fridge, you locate the butter and decide to treat yourself to some marmalade today.

After eating, you still have 2 and a half hours until Simon’s plane lands. Which leaves you roughly an hour until you need to drive to the airport. With the spare time, you prepare the gingerbread dough since it needs time to chill in the fridge. You combine all the ingredients together and cover the dough in plastic wrap. When you shut the fridge door, Phantom is there beside you, staring at you with her big brown eyes.

You end up googling a recipe for dog-friendly gingerbread cookies.

You now have an hour left to get to the airport. Phantom is gnawing on a cookie when you leave her in the bedroom. You bought a kennel last night and didn’t set it up until earlier. Shutting the bedroom door, you grab the car keys off the counter and head outside.

The weather is dreary as usual. It hardly snows in the winter, but the overcast skies look ready to cry any minute now. You drum on the steering wheel along to the song on the radio. The car hasn’t quite warmed up, and you tug your jacket sleeves down. Your phone goes off again, and you pull over to read the message.

Simon💀: Landing in half an hour.

You switch to the navigation app, and there’s no way you’ll get there on time with the current traffic conditions. Shifting gears, you apply more pressure to the gas pedal than is legally acceptable. Each time you glance at the digital clock in the car, your anxiety spikes. You still clutch onto the belief that you’ll make it on time. The second the next hour passes, the pool of dread in your stomach overflows into the rest of your body. Suddenly it’s too cold and too hot at the same time. You fiddle with the thermostat and turn up the radio, hoping Mariah Carey will drown your irrational thoughts.

The road sign for the airport comes into view, and you lean back into your seat. Your knuckles regain colour as you loosen your grip on the steering wheel. Changing lanes, you head in the direction of the parking lot. After parking, your shoes thwap against the wet pavement. Walking through automated doors, the buzz of the airport fills your ears. Squeaky wheels from dragged luggage. Thousands of footsteps are accompanied by the indistinct chatter of an entire building of people. But all that noise fades to the background when you spot him. You’re well-trained in the art of Simon spotting, a skill his enemies would be envious of.

It’s hard to describe. When you know someone well—and utterly adore them—you can recognize them with just a glance. That’s how it is with Simon. He always blends into whatever environment he’s in, but that unmistakable warmth that blooms in your chest and pools comfortably in your stomach. It’s like your body has been trained to recognize him.

So when your heart flutters at the brooding, hooded figure in the corner of the cafe, obscured by a potted plant, you know you’ve found him. Rich chocolate eyes meet yours, and they soften ever so slightly. You head to him, your feet stumbling over one another as they bicker over which pace to take. He opens an arm out, and you start running, flying across the ground until you crash into him. Simon steadies you with an arm around your waist. His hands rest on your hips, and he pulls you closer. Bourbon and cedar fill your senses, and you melt into his chest.

“Been a while,” he murmurs into your hair, inhaling the comforting scent of your shampoo.

You do your best to hug him back and squeeze with all your strength. “I missed you too.”

He pulls back and cradles your face in his hands, drinking in every line and curve. His thumb brushes against the slant of your smile, and his eyes crinkle at the edges. You lean in and peck where his mouth would be. His fingers tighten their hold, and he narrows his eyes at you. Someone drops their bags, and the loud thumps send his eyes snapping in the direction of the noise. He looks back at you, then around the airport, and releases your face. His hand drops and pinches your waist, and you know he’s smirking underneath the baklava.

“Ordered a drink for you,” and he nods at the table beside him. “Got thirsty waiting and thought you could use one.” You pick up the cup and sniff the lid. The scent of chocolate and whipped cream fills your senses, and you catch the faintest whiff of cinnamon. Taking a sip, the hot chocolate coats your tastebuds with sugar and spices. A small groan escapes your lips, and your fingers curl around the warm paper cup.

“Traffic was terrible,” you say, thinking back to all the vehicles on the roads. It didn’t help that an accident occurred and slowed everybody down.

Simon glances at the watch on his wrist and taps its face. “Half an hour late. You would be terrible at evac,” he muses. There’s a lilt in his tone, so you roll your eyes and take another sip of hot chocolate. Another wave of sweetness rolls down your throat, and your stomach buzzes pleasantly with warmth.

You shrug your shoulders. “Lucky I’m not in the military then.”

Simon stares at you and says, “What a blessing.”

Hot chocolate dribbles from the corner of your mouth, and you wipe it away with your sleeve. “Oh, shut up, Riley. I bet I would make a damn good soldier.” You straighten your spine and give him a mock salute.

His eyes never leave you, and the silence stretches for a minute or two. “I like the way things are. It’s dangerous out there; don’t need to be lookin’ out for you too.”

The curve of your smile flips. “What? You think I’d be dead weight?”

“Not what I meant,” and he reaches out a hand to you, but you shrug it off.

“Whatever. Let’s go. I’m not paying for another hour of parking. The airport prices are ridiculous.” You take a sip of your hot chocolate. There’s a bitter aftertaste on your tongue.

The drive back home is silent. Neither of you bring up what happened earlier at the airport. The radio is on low volume. Instrumentals of classic Christmas carols play. There’s that feeling of being watched, but your eyes remain on the road. You focus on the nice saxophone solo and not on Simon. The rhythmic tapping of his fingers begins to irk you a little. Still, no words are spoken.

His gaze continues to sear into your flesh, and just when you’re about to implode, Simon speaks first. “I’m sorry,” he says. You don’t respond, only turning off the radio. “What I meant was I don’t want to fear for your safety.” He pauses, and you hear him take a deep breath. “I like knowin’ you’re safe—at least safer here than if you were out on the field.” You pull over the car and shut off the engine. You face him, mouth glued shut. His eyes are glassy, and his brows are drawn close together. “Poppet, I can’t lose you,” and a tear falls. You scramble to unbuckle your seatbelt, clambering over to the passenger seat. Straddling his lap, you pull him into a fierce hug.

The most powerful man you know is clinging to you like he’ll fall apart with a single blow. Like a boat in a storm, desperately trying to survive the waves battering against its hull. You pry your lips apart and force the words to claw out of your throat. “I’m sorry that I lashed out. I haven’t seen you in 3 months and 10 days, but who’s counting?” A watery chuckle gurgles in your throat. “The point is, I’ve been pining like a fool, and when I heard those words, it made me feel like you didn’t miss me at all.”

Simon shakes his head and pulls you closer to his chest. “I’ve seen you flay men alive with a single glare, never mind what you could be capable of with some proper training. But to think about you dyin’ on a mission? ‘specially when I could have saved you? It would ruin me.” He strokes your hair, and you stare into his deep, brown eyes. “And didn’t miss you? That’s a load of bollocks. Poppet, you are constantly with me here,” he points to his head, “and here.” He places your hand over his beating heart. The pulse beneath your palm is erratic. “You’re mine, and I can’t lose you; I refuse to. You’re not dyin’ before me, you understand?”

You exhale and stretch to kiss his forehead. “I’m not going anywhere, Simon. There will be no death for either of us for a long time if I can help it.” His shoulders slacken, and you wipe away a stray tear from his eyes before it has a chance to fall. “I know it deep down in my bones, but it’s just nice to hear you say it sometimes. That you love me or miss me.”

“I missed you, poppet,” he murmurs into your hair.

You mute your chuckle with his shoulder, and he shudders from the vibrations. “It sounds disingenuous when you say it after I tell you to,” you say,

Simon huffs, “Bloody hell. I was tryin’ to be romantic.” Your fingers trail the edge of his baklava, and when he remains still, you roll the fabric up to expose his lips. He watches you with dark eyes. You cup his face with both hands and kiss him. It’s short and bittersweet. As much as you want to continue, you don’t want to stay on the side of the road any longer. If you’re unlucky, a concerned passerby might knock and ask if you need assistance. You would then proceed to die of embarrassment.

So instead, you pull away and whisper, “Are we ok?”

His eyes scan your face before lingering on your lips. “We are if you give me another kiss,” he replies. You lean in to kiss him again, and his hand cradles the back of your skull, keeping you in place. Every time you draw in air, he finds a way to steal it from your lungs. Your head spins from the lack of oxygen, and you don’t even notice the little moans and whimpers you let out. His beard rubs against your skin, and his lips are addicting. Thick fingers dig into your waist. The hand on your head is removed, and you pull away, panting. He gazes at you through hooded lids, pupils swallowed by black.

“I can’t drive the car if you keep me in your lap,” and you wrap your fingers around his hands, prying their grip on you. He relents, and you climb over to the driver's seat. You turn the key in the ignition, and the engine roars to life. Out of the corner of your eye, you see Simon reaching a hand out to you. There’s gentle pressure on top of your head, and you realize that he’s smoothing out your hair. He doesn’t say anything but does one last pet that trails his hand down to cup your cheek, stroking your skin with his thumb before pulling away. Your face already feels cold with the absence of his touch.

Clearing your throat, you turn on the signal light and continue the drive home. As you get closer to your destination, you grow more nervous for multiple reasons. 1) You have no idea if Phantom destroyed anything while you were gone. 2) You don’t know how Simon will react to Phantom. 3) You don’t know how upset Simon will be if reason 1 turns out to be true.

When you arrive, Simon holds the door open for you. You thank him and head inside. He follows after you, and the wheels of his suitcase clack when they catch on the bottom of the doorframe. The house still has traces of cloves and nutmeg in the air, a reminder of the gingerbread dough chilling in the fridge. Simon shrugs off his jacket and drapes it over the couch. Unable to hide it any longer, you decide to show him Phantom right away.

Simon is gone. Fuck.

You sigh and place your child down, watching her sniff the jacket her father left behind on the couch. Nibbling on your bottom lip, you grab your phone. This is not how you wanted tonight to go. You send a few messages, but Simon doesn’t respond to a single one. Although you can see that he’s read them, which pisses you off. He couldn’t have gone far, and you still have the car keys. The closest place nearby that isn’t a house is the small market square, which contains a grocery store and several self-owned businesses. Your boots pound against the pavement, and you dash through the streets. You reach the square and scan your surroundings. You spot him exiting a store and run up to him.

“Simon!” Your lungs burn, and your heart is rattling in your ribcage. Simon stares at you with wide eyes. His arms reach out to steady you.

“I’m sorry for leaving, poppet. When I heard, I knew I had to,” Simon says. He looks at the ground, stuffing his hands into his pockets.

You pant, catching your breath as the winter air stings your throat. You lick your chapped lips and begin to speak. “Simon, I—”

He cuts you off. “But no matter what, I will always—”

You interrupt him because you need to clear up the misunderstanding now. “Simon, I—”

“It’s alright, poppet. I would never—”

Your frustration reaches a boiling point. “I ADOPTED A PUPPY!” Flames engulf your entire face, and you’re positive there’s steam rising off your head. A few passersby stop walking at your outburst, and you shrink beneath their stares. Simon shields your body with his large frame and smooths your wind-ruffled hair. “Simon, I adopted a puppy,” you repeat.

“A puppy?” he rumbles, low and soothing.

You nod and smile. “Yes, a puppy. The cutest one I’ve ever seen.”

He raises a brow. “Walks on four legs, barks, and has a little tail that wags?”

You chuckle. “Last time I checked, yes.”

Simon sighs and leans into you. “I’m a fuckin’ idiot. We left the poor pup all alone,” and he holds your hand and leads you home.

You struggle to keep up with his long strides. Simon slows down when he notices you falling behind. “She. She’s all alone,” you say.

“Did she come with a name?” he asks.

You answer with, “Phantom.” Simon gives you a deadpan stare. “Why are you looking at me like that? I’m not messing with you. That’s her name,” you insist.

“So I suppose it’s all a coincidence?” he snorts.

You tilt your head. “Is that so hard to believe?”

“I don’t believe in coincidences.”

Squeezing his hand, you chirp, “Then it was a miracle. A Christmas miracle.”

“Poppet, the only miracle I’ll accept is when you walked into my life. Anything else is the harsh reality we live in.” You falter in your steps, stumbling forward when Simon doesn’t notice. He looks back at you, and time freezes. Deep brown eyes gaze upon you fondly, and a chill washes over your body. Behind the indifference is a tenderness reserved only for you. He brushes his thumb across your hand and tugs you into his side. His arm rests around your waist for the rest of the walk home.

You pause in front of the house and tug on his shirt. “I know you said you don’t like pets because they’re a big commitment, but I promise you’re going to love her,” you say.

His chuckle is hollow. “I think you overestimate my ability with animals. Not a bloody chance will she like me,” and you can hear the grimace in his tone.

You unlock the door, and Phantom greets you inside. She circles you and Simon, sniffing your pants. You grin and crouch down, accepting the sloppy kisses she gives you. Phantom races off to the living room, and you find her burrowed in a heap of Simon’s jacket. She must have pulled it off the couch after you left. Simon says nothing but watches the puppy with amusement.

“Go play with the puppy while I bake the gingerbread cookies,” you say, disappearing around the corner.

Simon trails after you. “Barrin’ me from the kitchen already? I’m a great helper.”

You scoff and block him from entering further. “No. What you mean is you’re great at eating all my cookies before I get a chance to decorate them.” You wave your hands and push him out of the kitchen. His hulking frame budges with remarkable ease. “Now, shoo. I need enough for the party tomorrow.”

Simon raises his hands in surrender and plants a kiss on your head before heading to the living room. You take out the dough from the refrigerator and flour the counter. You roll the dough out until it’s about an inch thick before using cookie cutters in various holiday shapes. Lining a baking sheet with parchment paper, you transfer the cut cookies. You collect the scraps of dough and reroll it.

Simon’s head pops into the doorway. “Poppet, what’s this?” he asks. The plushie of a cartoon ghost with a skull mask looks microscopic in his large hands.

You gasp, “That’s Phantom’s favourite toy! The store was having a clearance sale on all their Halloween stock, and it reminded me of you. I have a picture of her cuddling with it in bed.” You move to grab your phone from your pocket, but your hands are covered in flour and dough. “I’ll send it to you after I clean up.”

Simon says nothing, cradling the ghost plushie to his chest with a newfound tenderness as he returns to the living room. Phantom’s excited yip greets his footfalls, and your smile nearly splits your face into two. You continue cutting out more cookies, ending up with multiple trays worth.

As you place a few trays into the oven, Simon passes by. His footsteps are silent when he typically stomps around to alert you of his presence. He stops when you catch him leaving.

“And where are you off to?” you ask, setting the timer on the oven, careful not to accidentally turn the heat off instead.

Simon shrugs and says, “On a walk,” with an air of indifference.

“Will you carry Phantom in your arms the entire time?” you ask. Phantom’s tail thumps against Simon’s lower abdomen. He’s carrying her like a baby, and she looks at you with her tongue lolling out. “She has a leash, Simon. Use it.” You point to the hooks on the wall where the jackets go, Phantom’s leash being the newest addition.

He looks at the leash, Phantom, then back at you. “Her little paws might get tired,” and he waves one of her paws.

You shake your head, holding back a grin. “She’s a lot tougher than she looks.” You haven’t told Simon, but anyone with eyes can see that Phantom is small for her breed.

There’s a glint in Simon’s eyes. “Yeah? Must take after you, then,” he comments. Phantom barks in agreement. You stick your tongue out when he turns his back to you. “I saw that.”

“Saw what?” You feign ignorance.

Simon grabs the leash and clips it onto Phantom’s harness. He looks at you and shakes his head at the Cheshire grin on your face. “Saw you bein’ a cheeky little thing.”

“I don’t have a clue what you’re on about,” you say with a shrug. “Could you pick up some icing sugar on your walk? I’m running low.”

Simon nods and walks out the door, Phantom trotting dutifully by his side. You bite your lip and lean against the counter. God, you love watching him walk away.

While the cookies bake, you pass the time by window shopping online. Specifically dog products. You’re in the middle of reading the product description for dog thongs—who invented these anyway??—when the front door unlocks. Your finger zeroes in on the little ‘x’ to delete the page from your phone. You check on the cookies. One batch is currently on the cooling rack, while another is in the oven.

Phantom zooms into the kitchen, snout turned upwards and twitching madly. Cinnamon, cloves, and nutmeg fill the air. You can almost taste the spices on your tongue. Crouching down, you give Phantom little scritches behind her ear, and she tilts her head to give you easier access. Her hind leg twitches, and you chuckle. Heavy thumps and the creak of wood travel through the kitchen, and a shadow is cast over you. Glancing up, you see Simon holding a bouquet.

You stand up and accept the bundle of delicate red and white flowers. Bringing your face closer, you breathe in their sweet scent. The soft petals tickle your nose, and you resist the urge to sneeze.

He sticks his hands in his pockets and shuffles his feet. “Did you think I would forget?”

You rub the petals between your fingertips; they feel like satin. “I wasn’t expecting any since you’re home this year,” you confess. You assumed the bouquets were an apology for missing Christmas. The edelweiss and peonies will make a lovely addition to your collection.

Simon rubs the back of his neck. “Don’t like ‘em?” And the low baritone of his voice pitches.

A soft smile spreads across your face. You embrace Simon and rest your head against his chest. His heart races, rattling loud like a machine gun. “You silly man. I love everything you give me,” you reassure him, and the gunfire ceases.

Your head rises and falls with each breath he draws. “Just makin’ sure,” he rasps, combing his fingers through your hair. His hands trail down to your waist and leave your body. You notice him inching towards the cooling rack on the counter.

You smack his hand away and scold him. “Uh uh. Keep your hands away from my cookies. And don’t use your sneaky ninja skills to steal one. I will know if one of them goes missing.” Simon is not above using his military experience to snatch baked goods. He got away with it once, and you’ve made it a personal mission to never let it happen again.

“But there’s so many of ‘em. Nobody will complain if you show up with one less,” he grumbles.

You sigh, “Fine, but only because you won’t leave me alone until I give you a cookie.” He adjusts his baklava. There’s zero hesitation when he reaches over and amputates the arm of a gingerbread man. “Hey! You’re getting crumbs in my hair.”

“Sorry,” he mumbles with a full mouth, brushing your hair gently.

You remain in his arms, breathing in the sweet scent of bourbon mixed with his musk. Crunching fills the void of silence in the room. You look around and notice it’s only the two of you. “How’s Phantom?” you ask.

Simon glances in the direction of the living room. He hums, and the vibrations tickle you. “Out like a light. Walk must've tired her out,” he answers.

You plant a kiss on his chin, and his eyes soften. His fingers squeeze your hips. “I’m almost done. I’ll join you two in the living room soon,” you say.

He nuzzles the side of your head. “Don’t be too long,” he says, pulling away and caressing your cheek. You lean into his touch and nod, pressing a kiss to the palm of his hand. The crinkles around his eyes mirror yours. Simon nabs another cookie and darts out of the kitchen before you can stop him. You sigh and shake your head, looking for a vase to keep the flowers in.

Another twenty minutes pass before you’re done. You slide the last tray of cookies out of the oven and set it on the stovetop to cool. Remembering Simon, you pull off your oven mitts and check up on him and Phantom. You pause in the doorway, smiling to yourself at what you see. Simon is watching the tv, his eyelids drooping shut and snapping open every few seconds. He’s lying on the couch with Phantom curled up on his chest.

“I knew you would love her,” you whisper. Wide brown eyes lock onto your figure, and Simon sinks into the couch after seeing it’s you.

“A little help here?” he grunts. You stifle a chuckle at his current predicament.

“Can’t move a puppy, Lieutenant?” you tease.

He rolls his eyes at you. “Haven’t you heard of the saying: let sleeping dogs lie?”

You scoop up Phantom, who barely stirs from her sleep. Simon scoots further in and turns onto his side, patting the empty space beside him. You lie next to him with Phantom sandwiched between the two of you. His strong arms lock around your waist and prevent you from rolling off the edge.

The next few minutes are spent in silence, exchanging looks and gentle touches. Simon’s words catch you off guard. “Life without you is like the night sky without stars; empty and fuckin’ miserable to look at.” You drown in endless pools of black, seeing your reflection stare back with wide eyes. The silence amplifies the pounding in your ears. He speaks with such sincerity and conviction that you feel it with every fibre of your being.

Your lips twist into a smile, and you say, “I love you too.”

He rests his forehead against yours. “Merry Christmas, poppet.” His fingers draw random shapes on your back, eliciting a shudder from you.

“Merry Christmas, Simon,” you whisper, lips grazing against the fabric of his mask. He makes a content hum and watches you with an affectionate gaze. The fireplace crackles and tiny snores come from Phantom. The scent of gingerbread wafts from the kitchen and infiltrates the living room. Cozy. You feel cozy.

Simon stretches and groans, “I’ll be back. Need to make a quick trip to the loo.” He crawls over you, careful not to wake Phantom. The puppy twitches but otherwise gives no other indicators of consciousness. You reach for the tv remote and browse for a show to watch, already missing the heat of his body.

Simon goes to the bathroom and shuts the door behind him. He tugs the baklava off and rubs a hand over his face. From his pocket, he fishes out a small, velvet-lined box. He rushed to pick up his order when he heard the news.

His phone chimes, and he opens a message from you. There are two pictures. The first is Phantom curled up in her dog bed with the ghost plushie. His lips quirk, and he swipes to view the second photo. His heart stutters, fingers clutching the phone tight. It’s a miracle the screen protector doesn’t shatter. The second photo is a selfie of you and Phantom cuddling where he left you. There’s a goofy smile on your face despite your worried eyes drifting toward the sleeping dog. He can see the slight furrow in your brows—fuck do you make him soft. Now there’s a new addition to your family, and the pup proved him wrong when he thought he couldn’t grow softer. A tightness overcomes his chest, and his vision swims.

And suddenly, he’s scared. Because somehow, in this fucked up world, he found you. A random variable in his life that he has no control over. He’s terrified you’ll be ripped away from him like everyone else. That’s why he needs to do this. Needs to tie you to him forever so that there’s always a piece of you with him. Definitive proof that you are his. The night sky was a cheesy line, but he meant every word. He doesn’t want to come home to an empty apartment anymore. To count down the days until the next deployment. To worry about what terrible thing comes next. To function in life on autopilot.

Simon Riley is entirely aware of how much he loves you. And he’s terrified of how to prove it.

He exits the bathroom, one hand fidgeting with the box in his pocket.

“Bloody fucking hell.”

─── ⋆ ｡ﾟ☆: *. ☽ .* :☆ﾟ｡⋆ ───

End Note:

This thing honestly grew a lot bigger than I was expecting. The party mentioned above is definitely a party with the 141 and vaqueros, and I headcanon it to be the first official introduction between the reader and everyone. In that universe anyway.

Also, I totally did not plan on ending it with a possible proposal, it just kinda happened lol. Have fun imagining because I don't think I'll write it.

I do have an idea for a single-dad Price fic because we all know that would make such cute fluff. It was originally going to be for the holidays too, but I'll probably modify the story to work without it.

I'll see you guys at my next hyperfixation! (。・∀・)ノ

Reblogs are appreciated!

#simon ghost riley x reader #simon riley x reader #simon ghost riley #simon riley #cod x reader #cod mw2 #cod mwii #fluff #domestic fluff #mild hurt/comfort #Christmas fluff #banter #baking shenanigans #gender neutral reader #no y/n

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thewondelandifulcafe · 1 year

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Happy Father’s Day!!

Title: Happy Father’s Day!!

Menu: Twisted Wonderland

Beverage: Thai Bubble Tea, Green Tea, Honeydew Milk Tea

Main Dish(es): Croissants

Side Dish(es): Pies: Pumpkin Pie

Spoilers: None

Word Count:

Trigger Warning: None

Summary: How would they be as fathers? Good or Bad? Fun or Strict?

Notes: K/N = Kid’s name, O/K/N = other kid’s name

Leona Kingscholar

He would be that father who would say “Yes honey” and not put up a fight with you. He’s too lazy. Yes even at what 35 or however old he is he’s still the laziest person your ever meet.

He’s also the dad that if their kid does something wrong he will do one of two things. One: Say nothing absolutely nothing to you if he finds it ever harmless or if he wants to annoy you. Two: Snitch on his kid. Yes he will snitch on his own kid. “Oh Y/N~ Guess what K/N did.” “Dad no!”

You and him have three or one kids no other questions. He refuses to have two kids. He knows the pain of being second oldest with no little sibling to be with him. Three kids is your best bet if you want more.

He’s watching tv with you and your kid climbs on top of him. He’s “annoyed” and tries to push his kid alway. K/N staying on refusing to let go. And laying on his stomach like it’s a pillow. You are laughing and Leona is grinning ear to ear. Laughing loudly.

“K/N get off” Leona says jokingly “annoyed”. Leona tries push K/N alway while K/N is whining because he doesn’t want to get off. You bursting out in laughter. Leona gives up and K/N lays his head on Leona’s stomach; napping. Leona grinning ear to ear. Both of you laughing.

“Like father like son/daughter”

Malleus Draconia

He’s that father who wants what’s best for his kid so he is strict but fun. He will always try to let his kid do whatever he wants (of course with normal rules) but if he thinks it’s too dangerous he will refuse to let them.

He wants maybe one or two but whatever his child of the man wants he’s happy to oblige. Nothing else is more important to him than his family. Anything you want he’s happy to deliver.

He goes all out on gifts for his kid, anything they want they’ll got of course with rules involved. Nothing is too expensive. This man is a prince for god sakes. He will probably want to buy a little too much. You have to tell him when enough is enough. He listens very easily. K/ N whines a bit.

“Mal don’t you think that’s a bit too much” you lay on Malleus’s arm. “Of course darling I didn’t realize,” Malleus says without much fuss. “But Dad,” K/N pouts. “K/N look at all the gifts you have already,” you tell K/N. K/N looks around to see the mountains of gifts. “Fineee” they whined.

“Mal sometimes I think your spoil them too much.”

Kalim Al-Asim

Anything your kid wants he gives. No rules no nothing. You have to worry about that. Always wants to gift them something everyday.

Wants to have like 19 or 32 kids like he did. But he’ll be happy with 5. He understands if you don’t want as much. But someone has to keep them company it can’t be just you two!

Overreacts about everything. K/N passed a history test? “Let’s have feast for their achievement!” He sprained his ankle? “Y/N CALL 911 WE NEED AN AMBULANCE!” Etc you get the deal.

“K/N whats wrong? Kalim asks. “O/K/N pushed me!” K/N cried. “I hurt my ankle!” “YOU HURT YOUR ANKLE?!” Kalim screamed so loud you panicked and ran to where Kalim was. “KALIM WHAT HAPPENED?” You yelled. “Y/N CALL 911 WE NEED AN AMBULANCE!!” Kalim screams worried. “What why what happened.” “I hurt my ankle” K/N says with the most innocent face. “He’s fine” You said. “Really?!” Kalim says.

“Oh Kalim it’s not that big of a deal just let him rest.”

A/N: I finally posted! I’m so proud of this! Happy Father’s Day btw! Some of these things are based on my own dad so try and guess which one. I’m going to try to post on Sundays and Holidays! I’m taking requests! So please check here

#twisted wonderland #twst #leona kingscholar #twst headcanons #leona #Kalim x reader #Malleus x reader #leona x you #leona x reader #Kalim x y/n #leona x y/n #Malleus #Malleus x you #malleus x y/n #twst malleus #twst wonderland #disney twisted wonderland

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rinxnie · 2 years

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what the monster high boys buy at mcdonald's (probably...maybe)

clawd: this wolf's getting a meaty burger like a triple cheeseburger or an angus with a frozen coke - he needs the proteins (or slushie/freeze?? whatever yall call a frozen icy drink thing in your country)

deuce: definitely chips and a sprite to share with his snakes

jackson: you know this boy gets a large, single black coffee with 3 extra shots to deal with not only holt's tomfoolery but also all the shit he experiences at monster high

holt: he's the one who gets a mcflurry but adds every topping and sauce to it

heath: a 6 pack nugget happy meal and definitely with a strawberry shake bcus pink is pretty - he'd collect the toys too and ask if there's any others when he gets 1 he already has

porter: this hooligan is ordering food solely to create an art project - my boy will build a tower of apple pies in the middle of the restaurant (he still doesnt listen to both his dads lectures to not play with food and yes i hc he has gay ghost dads)

johnny: classic burger and shake - treats maccas like a 60's diner (which is a vibe ig)

invisi billy: a chocolate sundae but dips his chips in it

valentine: probably some elaborate sweet coffee with caramel syrup but pretends its a long black and a chocolate donut or macaroons from mccafe - depends on the day

neighthan: i dont know why but i feel like he gets a mcchicken with apple juice while giving all the boys a cheeky little therapy sesh at maccas

gil: filet-o-fish

manny: he deserves nothing...

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scalpho · 1 year

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neverafter PCs at mcdonalds

(thanks @sebari-1004 for brainstorming these with me during pattycake)

rosamund - very enthusiastic about her first mcdonalds trip. ylfa and pinocchio recommend she get a happy meal, and she gets one with chicken nuggets, fries (she was going to get the fruit slices until pinocchio put a hand on her shoulder, looked her in eyes and told her They're shit), milk (which she gives to pib) and a toy. for fun! would probably also get an apple pie, or an iced latte for the caffeine

timothy - fillet o fish, or a mcplant (not because he's vegetarian, but because he likes the taste). usually gets a bag of fruit slices to set a good example for ylfa, and some kind of coffee (probably just black)

pinocchio - desserts. just the desserts. donuts and mcmuffins and apple pies and brownies and whatever else they've got. and a black coffee, into which he pours close to fifty packs of sugar (the majority of which do not dissolve and instead just congeal at the bottom of his leg hatch)

pib - mostly pawns some stuff off the others; or, rather, is given stuff by the others. rosamund gives him the milk from her happy meal, someone will give him a couple of fries, tim tears off the corner of his fish fillet. sometimes will get a fillet o fish for himself, but without the bun or the sauce - just the fish. also usually gets an espresso, which he pretends to drink but doesn't

gerard - will probably get a coffee if he's dragged there so he doesn't have to sit there with nothing, but is vehemently against mcdonalds. or, at least, claims to be - whenever anyone's not looking, frog tongue shoots out to steal a french fry. will pretend to "go to the toilet" and instead go to secretly order fries (which he hides away until later, when he's alone. eats them soggy and cold, which he, on some level, prefers. frog stuff.)

ylfa - happy meal with burger, fries, fruit slices (as encouraged by various Authority Figures), and juice (apple if it's available, orange otherwise). also orders several burgers on top of that (mcsteak, mcrib, mcgriddle, whatever they've got these days) and just wolfs them down whole. her and rosamund cheers with apple juice and apple pie, respectively

#neverafter #rosamund du prix #timothy goose #pinocchio neverafter #pib neverafter #gerard of greenleigh #ylfa snorgelsson #scal txt

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jinstronaut · 3 months

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tysm for the tags @cordiallyfuturedwight + @sevencoloredstar ♥

Who is your favourite kpop group?

bangtan sonyeondan do u kno

Which member sparked your interest first?

taehyung in that 2020 grammy's old town road performance video i wont LIE TO U i said who the FUCK is that man what is going ON

Who was your first bias?

seokjin uwu

Who is your current bias?

mf seokjin i am a LOYAL BITCH (also tae and yoongi tho)

What makes them your current bias?

idk what to tell u without waxing poetic for 18 years just know that i lov jin so so much he is just like me fr fr. he is so smart and talented and wise and funny and light hearted and dedicated. also his solo music rly speaks to me like.... the entire song he wrote dealing with his depression???? wow king me too. everything he does just makes me so happy and feel so at peace. he is truly the best human. i lov Jin.

Who is your bias wrecker?

jungkook i cant deny it any longer im gonna kick him

Which members are you currently obsessing over that aren't your bias/bias wrecker?

its pretty much always hobi like what the fuck is jung hoseok doing he got me acting UP

When did you first discover this group?

may 2021!!!!! i was in between jobs post covid and just trolling youtube one day and the bts carpool karaoke kept popping up and i was like okAY FINE ILL WATCH IT. and then it spiraled from there and i was so down bad within 24 hrs its insane. it was RIGHT before the release of butter too i was so happy ;o;

Have you ever been to one of their concerts?

i got to see boongi dday tour opening night!!!!!! the last time i was truly happy i s2g!!!!!!!!!!

What are some of your favorite songs by the group?

yall kno spring day. do u kno her. do u appreciate her. do u understand the cultural impact she had and is still having. no one loves her like i do that's a fact.

but also uh. save me, coffee, like, autumn leaves, magic shop, 00:00, UGH!, run bts, i wont lie all of dark and wild that album is >>>>>>>>>>. also dimple, and pied piper. yeah.

tagging: @jiniekook, @kimtaegis, @livelocks + anyone else who would like to!

#tag games //#mutuals 💕#teeheehee i lov bts

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bipolar-sad-and-ready-to-cry · 1 month

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I have a the sun and moon show AU brewing ♡┉ˏ͛ (❛ 〰 ❛)ˊˎ┉♡

What is the AU? Well they are all magical girls (but most are men lol) with pretty dresses and pretty much all of them are one big happy family (family includes KC, Sun, Moon, Eclipse, Solar, Bloodmoon, Lunar, and Jack o moon) and I’ve been drawing designs of them and their weapons for the past few days so I shall show the first one I drew which is Sun and explain things about the AU

Ok so in this AU there are magical beings who get stronger with every soul they have and the one of and the most common ways they can get souls is to make a deal with a mortal and take their souls, Frank is a magical being who takes the form of a small plushie for of himself and he has only one soul and that’s KC’s soul (yes animatronics have souls in this AU) and KC asked that he and his children all become magical girls, Frank who doesn’t really enjoy the power that comes with souls agreed to this deal, At this point KC hadn’t made his children yet but first came Sun and Moon then Eclipse and Solar and then the Bloodmoon twins and then Lunar and then Earth and Jack was created by Solar much much later so he is KC’s grandson in this AU. I will be showing the rest of the designs soon if you guys wish but for now about a bit about Sun!

Sun’s weapons are guns (duh) his skirt acts like a pocket that he can reach into and pull out any gun he wishes but they are always covered in yellow glitter so he tracks glitter everywhere, he is the second oldest out of all the siblings but he is also the most dramatic, he loves his rom coms and reading those drama magazines, he finds internet drama too crazy tho. He can eat foods and his favourites are spaghetti, chicken pot pies and the occasional ice cream! Also he may or may not be a balance king I mean those shoes and he has taller shoes

I probably won’t be writing any fanfics based on this AU but do tell me what you all think! ☆*✲୧( ○ ╹ 〰 ╹ ○ )୨✲*☆

Also I understand probably a few of you do not like tsams and I respect that entirely but I like it so I make AUs with it but I will only label it tsams for the people who don’t wanna see it!

#magical girl au #tsams au #tsams sun #tsams

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acefaun · 8 months

Note

Hello ( o´ｪ｀o)

Can i request a fic? Reader is struggling with her life, emotionally. And Bilbo comforts her.

Bilbo~ Late Night Chat

Synopsis: It’s not good to bottle up your feelings. Luckily, there are perks to having a friendly, burglar hobbit around! Maybe you just need someone to share your burdens in life…

🍃Masterlist🍃 Female MC!

A/n: Mood. I also just assumed we were human. And our emotional grief was vague, so I just ran in the direction my internal angst was telling me to go, and I hope it’s alright! Then again, it also feels like platonic fluff… 🤭 HAPPY (extremely late) HOBBIT DAY! 🌿☕

–Word Count: 2,093–

Bilbo knew you were the only woman journeying with them to the Lonely Mountain; much in the same fashion that he was the only hobbit journeying with their motley crew. Still, his purpose for being there was simply that he was their hired burglar. Bilbo had never heard of a reason why you might have been joining them. It wasn’t that you looked too young to be going off to fight dragons… But he thought you were much too pretty—not that he’d ever say that out loud, especially in front of all these dwarves who seemed to prefer their women with more hair…

He never imagined himself traveling across Middle Earth with a company of dwarves and a wizard, let alone a human. He couldn't imagine why you would have been traveling with a group like them on such a dangerous mission—only Gandalf really knew the answer to that question.

Regardless, over time, he was growing less curious and more… worried about you.

One night, when you'd offered to keep watch over the camp, Bilbo joined you, sitting by the warm fireside. Bilbo saw the two of you as close friends, being that you were the couple of non-dwarven members of the company. Oftentimes, the two of you banded together in the face of trouble. So, while there didn't outwardly appear to be anything immediately life-threatening, Bilbo still took this to be one of those troublesome times.

Without consulting you, he brewed a small pot of tea for the two of you with the few tea leaves he brought from home.

This action caught your confused attention. You curiously pointed out, “I thought you only had a few of those… I was sure you'd use them once our journey was nearing its end.”

Bilbo shrugged, glancing at you with a light-hearted smile. “I was saving them for the right occasion,” he admitted, “This seems like as good an occasion as any.”

“What occasion might that be? A little hobbit tradition I don't know about?”

“Well, tea is a relaxing drink. I find it helps clear the mind—I was sure it was a bit of a comforting tradition in any race,” he casually explained, as if any reason were a good reason to have tea. “It should also warm you up. You don't want to catch cold out here.”

“Comforting…?” You repeated that singular word, gazing at him questioningly, but he could clearly see through you. You sighed, resigning yourself to his kindness. “Thank you.”

After he brewed the tea and served it, you drank quietly together for a peaceful moment. The atmosphere was always calm and serene when the dwarves were (mostly) all sleeping.

While you both sat relaxed and gazed at the stars, Bilbo quietly said in a matter-of-fact tone, “You know… this is the farthest I've ever been from home.” You curiously glanced at him to show you were listening. “The Shire… Bag End… It seems small, now, compared to the rest of the world.”

You nodded your head in solemn agreement. This little hobbit was learning. “Becoming a traveler will give you new perspectives on everything you've known.”

He silently huffed, nodding his head before sipping his tea. There was an understanding between the two of you. “Somehow,” he continued, “I ended up being the lucky hobbit chosen to join the company. It was just luck that I was burglar material, I guess.” He shrugged sheepishly as he added, “And I was fortunate enough to meet you…” He eyed you as if you were supposed to pitch in at any time.

Sighing, you reluctantly pitched in, “Well, I'm glad you joined us. It might not seem like much right now, since your priority is to sneak into the mountain… But sometimes I think you're the only thing holding me together.”

Finally, he was getting through to you; you were opening up to him. “You’ve been through your fair share of troubles in this company; and us non-dwarven folk have to look out for one another.” He added that last part with a fond smile. “But you know, beyond being a healer, you never really said why you decided to help a bunch of dwarves find their way back home. Don't you have a family worried about you?”

“You're pretty far from home, Bilbo…” You quietly referenced his previous statement. “Well, I am too… I've been a traveler for a while now, preparing for this very journey.”

“Hold up- Wait,” Bilbo stuttered to stop you in your tracks. “Preparing? You knew about this company before it was made?”

“Not exactly,” you vaguely answered. Well, it was time you shared your origins with your dearest traveling companion. “Bilbo… I come from Esgaroth, or… better known as Lake-town, a little homely village of men just before the Lonely Mountain. We were survivors from the City of Dale.”

Bilbo’s eyes widened as if just recognizing the significance of this journey to you. “So you… you've seen the dragon?” He was hesitant to ask such a heavy question, but it came out as any other normal question would.

Maybe because of the number of years that had passed, you felt less daunted by that kind of question, despite the invisible scars and trauma the dragon left you with. You nodded tersely. “I was a child at the time… and my brother did his best to keep us safe. That… didn't stop it from becoming a traumatic memory for anyone. And then rumors started spreading of a story… that some day the dwarves would return to reclaim Erebor and reawaken the dragon, drowning everything in seas of flame…” You paused, silence filling the air until you gained the courage to continue your tale, “You asked me if I had any family worried about me. Well, my brother and his children are waiting for me back home. That's where I'm going… home. Same as everyone here.”

Despite your full explanation and honest answer, Bilbo looked conflicted, like there was something he wasn’t understanding. There was something missing from your story; there was some kind of gap, some detail that he wasn’t privy to. “Why would you… be helping the dwarves enter the mountain at the risk of facing the dragon again? You can’t… want to face it…”

He studied you intensely, and though you appeared deeply troubled at the journey ahead, you also looked determined—something that left Bilbo speechless. Your eyes met his, eyes that held much tenacity. “You’re right,” you agreed with him. “I don’t think anyone in their right mind would want to face a fire-breather, especially not twice in one lifetime. But I have to. The family I have in Lake-town are the only ones I have left, and I’m going to protect them. After all… our father almost slayed the dragon, revealing a weak spot that, if exploited, could end his reign over Erebor and ensure the safety of my family.”

Bilbo gaped at you, shocked at this information that had never been shared before. “You’re saying there is a way to kill the dragon?”

You offered him a smile. It should have been an encouraging smile, but even you knew that the chances of success were slim… but not zero. “Yes,” you acknowledged. “My brother and I are the only two who are aware of it. I’m hoping I can bring this up with him when we reach Lake-town… and that he doesn’t turn you all away at the door. After all… we’re all aware of the legends that foretell Lake-town’s demise.”

“That’s… a lot of pressure to be carrying on your shoulders alone,” Bilbo grieved for you, knowing you wouldn’t admit yourself that this was, in fact, a burden on you. “Especially since it affects your family…” He paused before gently laying a hand on your arm. If he knew anything, it was that you must have been in a great deal of emotional turmoil since this journey started—nay, before that, even. “I’m glad you shared this with me. Please… if there’s anything I can do-”

He paused as your hand rested on top of his. Once again, your eyes met in a tender gaze. “Thank you for listening,” you responded in appreciation. Bilbo was truly a kind hobbit.

Bilbo relaxed at seeing the soft, almost untroubled look in your eyes. At the very least, you looked less burdened now that you had confided in someone. “(Name)... It must be a lot to have kept this to yourself for so long. Now, I’m not one to lecture, but it’s not good to bottle up your feelings. You were going headfirst into a personal battle without any backup.” Inhaling deeply, he added, “I’m going to be behind you the entire time.” He nodded with unfaltering loyalty. “More than just getting these dwarves back home… I want to help you get home, (Name). You’ve been through so much, and you’re still fighting. You’re incredibly strong for having come so far. Now, I know we haven’t reached the end yet… but I’ll be right beside you when we do.”

His eyes widened when your arms suddenly flew around him, holding him close to you. For a flustered moment of his life, he wasn’t sure what to do, but his instincts kicked in, and he was embracing you right back in no time. His chin rested on your shoulder as he comfortingly rubbed your back. It was official… he didn’t care what happened, so long as everything worked out for you in the end. He was absolutely smitten. He was thanking every god above that neither of you were holding your cups of tea at the moment you decided to strike, however. But he was grateful to have come up with the idea of making tea for you in the first place.

“Gandalf was right,” you quietly mused.

Though, that comment made Bilbo bewildered. “About what…?”

“Hobbits are extremely homely.” You beamed, relaxing beside him once more. He was glad to see you smile again, he was thrilled to see you look more at ease than you had since your journey started. But… it was because of him? You must have noticed his perplexed expression, for you explained, “Gandalf mention that hobbits are extremely fond of the comforts of home. But here, under a blanket of stars, I find myself feeling at home with you, Bilbo.”

He took that to mean… that you were comfortable around him, as you would be in your own home. The thought make him perk up with a poorly-hidden smug grin. “Well, I guess being a burglar isn’t my only talent,” he jested. “Though, I have to agree… drinking tea with you under the stars makes me feel like I’m right back in Bag End.” He hummed thoughtfully. “The world is a small place when you’re with someone you care about…”

His cheeks flushed when he felt your hand rest over his, and slowly, together, you lightly intertwined your fingers. You didn’t say anything, but he had a feeling you were sharing his unspoken feelings. For the moment, they would remain unspoken, untouched, untrodden. All he desired was your company, your contentedness. His grip around your hand tightened reassuringly as the two of you basked in the calm night.

***

Kili nudged Fili’s shoulder, shaking the blonde dwarf awake, gesturing for his silence with a finger in front of his lips before he could jolt upright and cause a scene. Fili shot a questioning gaze to his brother, who quite energetically gestured to the dim fire.

At first, he was irritated that Kili woke him up at all, but seeing the silhouette of the hobbit and the human, his eyes widened as if to take in the two on look-out. Fili’s eyes flickered back to Kili and they both shared knowing grins, nudging each other as quietly as they could in their aggressive dwarfish manner.

Indeed, Middle-Earth was a small world.

#middle earth #the hobbit #the hobbit fanfic #the hobbit bilbo #bilbo baggins #bilbo x reader

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cartridgeconverter · 10 months

Text

Happy toki pona day nerds, here's an opera line that I thought fit too well with toki pona naming conventions not to translate

KIWEN PI JAN UTALA jan Sowani (o), mi li lon sina tan sina wile moku poka!

Literal translation:

STONE OF THE FIGHTING PERSON (Statue of the Commander) Sowani person, I am at you (here with you) because you wanted to eat beside me!

JAN SOWANI mi sona e ni ala a taso mi li ken moku jan anpa o, jo e moku sin o pana e moku ni

Literal translation:

SOWANI PERSON (Don Giovanni) I don't think this (I don't believe this) but I can eat. Bowing-down person (servant), carry new food. Give that food!

Notes:

I got really excited when I realized that the title "Don" could be easily replaced by the toki pona "jan", used when referring to a person. Except I forgot that when using the vocative, you have to add "o" at the end. So it's rather clumsily appended to "jan Sowani" in the first line (though I find it unneccessary, since there's no command after it). This means that the entire premise that I started this little project on is flawed. Oh well.

In the second line, Giovanni addresses his servant, Leporello. The issue is that since he's not a nobleman, Leporello doesn't have a title that can be conveniently substituted for "jan", meaning that if I were to try and use his actual name, I would have to shorten it by two syllables so it would still fit the meter of the line. My solution was to refer to him as "jan anpa", or "bowing-down person".

For fun, here are all of the characters' names, adapted into the sounds of the toki pona language with no regard for meter: jan Lepolelo jan Sowani jan Ana (this one is basically the same.) jan utala (or jan Konsalo if we choose to refer to him as that) jan Otawijo jan Ewila jan Selina jan Maseto (this one is also the same.)

I did think about translating this whole show, once. But then I realized that I would probably get bored halfway through. I'd also have to think of like 60 million four syllable words roughly meaning "bad person" for Elvira and another 60 million pet names for Ottavio, or else just have to keep using "jan ike" (evil person) and "pona mi" (my good or perhaps my joy) over and over again in the same scenes. No thank you.

#toki pona #don giovanni #operaposting #suno pi toki pona #long post #sort of #Why did I do this.#toki pona folks if you ever want to chat in the language you can call me jan Wekeli :)

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nyxicnymph · 2 years

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Here, Kittykitty!

Genshin Impact characters as cats and how you ended up adopting them. Featuring: Aether, Venti, Xiao, Kazuha, Heizou + Scaramouche Special thanks to @eenochian for sparking this. Warnings: Implications of violence hidden in Xiao and Kazuha's sections. Beyond that, nothing? Kitties and kitty related fluff. Summary: You've adopted quite a few cats! How did you get all these cutie pies? Notes: OH FUCK XIAO'S GOT LONG.

Please reblog if you enjoyed!

Aether:

Aether was the first cat you adopted. You had been lonely lately, so you went to your local shelter, and found this beautiful golden baby with a white starburst on his chest.

The staff told you that he'd been separated from his littermate a while ago, and seemed quite sad.

You couldn't resist him after that, declaring that he was now your baby. You named him, signed the papers, and that was that.

You brought him home, made him comfortable, then settled in for some relaxation, hoping to give him some time to adjust.

After exploring your home some, he hopped up next to you, and gently put his paws on your lap.

"What is it, Ae baby?"

He licked your nose, then curled up next to you.

Aether is exceptionally good when you have company, the politest baby, always asking before cuddling someone. He also gives everyone thorough sniffs.

Eventually, though, your vacation ended, and you had to return to your job.

Aether always seemed so sad when you left, and so happy to see you when you returned.

But you could tell he was lonely. So you decided to adopt another cat to keep him company.

Venti:

The next cat you adopted was a shiny black kitty with turquoise eyes and a green sheen to his fur.

He had been biting his kennel when you came around the corner to see him, but as soon as he made eye contact, he rolled onto his belly and chirped at you.

You were captivated. Once again wasted no time in naming, signing papers for, and taking home this beautiful baby.

He took to Aether very well, though Aether looked a little bit steamrolled.

literally.

The first thing Venti did upon being released into your home was roll on top of a sleeping Aether.

Aether woke up very confused, and immediately dragged himself out from under Venti.

You could swear that Venti pouted.

Venti is a chatty kitty. Even if he's not with you, you can hear him meowing away in the other parts of the house.

The only times he's not talking are when he's sleeping, eating, or hiding.

The first time Venti disappeared, you freaked out.

You realized you hadn't seen him since that morning, and it was approaching dinnertime.

After calling his name several times, Aether caught your attention with a demure meow. When you looked at him, he trotted to the fireplace and meowed up the chimney.

"Aether, what- VENTI?!"

You dragged Venti out of the chimney. "How on earth did you get up there?!"

He continued to disappear randomly.

After a while you just gave up, figuring Venti would show up when he was hungry.

One time, he crawled out of your linen closet, disheveled and not quite aware of his surroundings yet.

You were pretty sure he'd slept in there for three days.

Venti was not allowed to come out whenever you had company.

Too rambunctious and mischievous.

He would steal anything and everything.

Before you started keeping him in your room when you had company, he'd taken a cap, a ring, a necklace, and someone's hairtie.

He'd even shoved his face in someone's drink. That was the last straw for him.

Xiao:

Xiao was an unplanned adoption. He didn't even come from the shelter!

His story was possibly your favorite.

It was midnight when you heard the sounds of a catfight outside.

Fearing for Venti and Aether, you woke up immediately and began looking for the source of the sound.

You're actions disturbed the golden cinnamonroll at the end of your bed, his face fur all smooshed on one side.

An insistent meow came from the living room, and you found Venti pacing the windowsill there. Petting him soothingly, you looked outside, your porch light casting an orange glow.

A flashing of eyes caught your eyes, and you gasped when you saw a small , and medium-haired black and dark gray tabby with golden eyes fighting off at least three rats, maybe more. You ran to your linen closet and grabbed a towel before running out the door.

The rats scattered as your front door opened, but the cat didn't. He remained in place, breathing heavily with his head down.

You cautiously moved towards him, then before he could run, scooped him up in your towel. He hissed at you, but even through the towel you could tell he had wounds.

Luckily, you had the necessary medicines and vaccines.

When you closed the front door, Venti hopped off the windowsill, and then sat at your feet, quietly meowing at the writhing bundle in your arms.

"Sorry, baby boy, but he's not in a good mood right now."

You gave the dark tabby a brief bath, Venti still meowing from the floor.

Aether came in while you were tending to the other cat's wounds, and before you could stop him, he'd darted forward and licked the other kitty on the forehead.

To your surprise, the other cat then immediately relaxed. He fell asleep! Aether purred smugly, and you had to wonder if he'd met this cat before on his brief ventures outside.

You kept the new cat exclusively inside for several weeks, eventually caving and naming him "Xiao". He wasn't very happy about being kept inside, but he tolerated it as best as he could.

Picky eater. Hated the dry kibble you had, so you had to set his food aside separately and drizzle water over it.

Eventually, you removed the last bandage from Xiao, and as you were leaving for work, you finally let him out.

You didn't expect him to come back, but when you came home, he was sitting on your porch, vigilantly scanning the yard below.

"Hi, brave boy!" you cooed. His ears flicked at you, and he stood up and arched his back.

Then he meowed at you, and you thought you were dreaming. He'd never meowed at you before, only hissed or growled.

When he followed you inside, and then joined the cuddle pile on the bed that night, you could have cried for how happy and proud of him you were.

Xiao is easily provoked and also quite shy, so he very rarely meets company. He only comes out when he's heard or smelled someone several times before, and even then he only watches from a distance, sitting straight up on the farthest stool, his golden eyes narrowed at the perceived interloper.

Kazuha:

You woke up to an unfamiliar weight on your chest and a strange purr rumbling around you.

You pried open your eyes at a wailing from Aether, and were immediately faced with crimson eyes.

A long haired, cream colored kitty with an orange spot on his right ear, and a few other speckles scattered through his fur stared down at you from your chest.

"What the-"

Xiao jumped up beside you and bapped the newcomer on the head, causing him to hiss.

"Xiao, no! Be nice!" You scolded, still pinned under the cream cat loaf.

"Excuse me, sir, I would like to get up. How'd you get in here?"

Venti chirped from your windowsill then, and you could swear he looked more mischievous than usual.

"Welcome home, vagrant," you mumbled as the cream cat stretched and removed himself from you.

You closed your window with a glare at Venti, who was washing his face, pointedly ignoring you.

"Okay, now what did you come here for?" You ask the newcomer, who is being intently inspected by Aether, and glared at by Xiao.

You give him a few strokes, and immediately noted several mats and knots in his fur. You probe farther and find a few scars, and an open wound on one of his front paws. He only hissed when you tried to get a closer look at his paw, curling it up to his chest in pain.

You got sick the next day, so you spent the next couple of days taking care of both yourself and this new kitty cat. You combed out his fur after a bath, tended to his paw and a few other wounds, and investigated his scars to make sure they weren't infected.

By the time you were well enough to return to work, the cat you had named "Kazuha" looked much healthier and happier.

He liked to follow Xiao outside, but opposed to stalking around the yard like he was on patrol, Kazuha preferred to nap in the sunny flowerbeds.

Occasionally, he'd wander off like Venti, but he always came home in time for dinner, even sometimes dragging Xiao or Venti with him.

You figured he'd leave when he was ready.

Kazuha was another cat that you let your guests meet, as he was gentle, quiet, and not easily provoked. They especially loved his fur, and one time, someone suggested that he might actually be a fairly prestigious breed.

Regardless, you didn't have a birth certificate, so you couldn't do anything about that.

Heizou:

You were at work when you saw this dark ginger and black tabby pacing in front of a tree.

When you clicked your tongue as a greeting, he swiveled his head around, and piercing green eyes met yours. He yelled at you, but didn't leave the base of the tree.

You saw him again the next day. And the day after that. Sometimes, you had your lunch break outside where he hung around, and he would join you.

He liked to sniff your food, then he'd wander off and try to catch whatever insects flew his way.

You even watched him stalk a squirrel once. He caught it, but then he let it go, tilting his head as it ran away in a panic.

After asking around, you'd determined that this sweet, playful ball of energy was just a stray. Somehow, he'd avoided Animal Control each time they came around, and they'd given up on him.

You resolved to take him home.

The first time, you'd called him over, calling him "Heizou", but when you'd tried to pick him up, he'd bounded away, his tail held high.

What a brat.

He knew it too, you could tell by the way he watched you as he washed his paws.

Eventually, you gave up, and on your next lunch break, you made a small sacrifice.

You opened a can of fish and left it in the passenger's seat of your car, as well as a small dish of water, left the window down a bit, and went back to work.

You came back to your car later to see the sassy tabby sleeping in the seat, the can knocked to the floor.

Your hands were shaking as you quickly unlocked the car, opened the door, and got in. You were rolling up the window when he sleepily opened an eye. Then he yawned and stretched his paws out.

You brought him home without an incident.

And when you opened the door to your house to let your kitty parade in, he fell right into line.

Heizou immediately got along well with Aether and Kazuha, and Venti to some degree.

Xiao was not a big fan at first, especially since Xiao was very possessive over Aether as his cuddle buddy, and Heizou stepped all over that.

You'd occassionaly let Heizou out to play when you had guests over, but usually only if there were kids who would play with him like he enjoyed.

Heizou enjoys yarn, cat toys, and scratchpads. You even caved and finally bought an indoor cat tree, one with enough space for all of your silly boys.

Scaramouche:

Scaramouche wasn't even your cat.

Xiao had discovered him first, and the fight was enough to bring you running from your office.

He had apparently decided that hiding under your porch was the best way to escape from his real owners across the street.

You had no idea how those ladies put up with him.

He was mean.

Still, you couldn't just let him starve, so you set out his own dishes of food and water, then explained to your neighbors where he was.

They patted you on the head and gave you their gratitude. They said he was "in a phase", but they were glad he'd found someone who would let him get over it.

They'd actually tried to come and get him back several times, but he always managed to vanish.

Whatever his problem was, he's occasionally get over it enough to slink out onto the porch and glare at you.

Don't you dare look back at him, though. As soon as you make eye contact, he runs away.

And avoids your place for several days.

That bothers you and his owners, but there's nothing you can do about it.

Still, it makes you sad that such an obviously pampered cat would have such a mean streak :(

~End~

#5wirl #nyx writes stuff #genshin impact #headcanons #5wirl headcanons #aether #venti #xiao #kazuha #heizou #scaramouche #genshin aether #xiao genshin impact #kaedehara kazuha #shikanoin heizou #nyx talks about stuff #the castle's lady speaks

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