#my toxic trait is that i find that line funny
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Zoro has rapidly become my favourite character in One Piece and so I felt the need to write this after seeing one too many people misinterpret him as this alpha male type of dude purely because he's muscular and likes fighting. Don't do my boi like that, I actually think Zoro is a very good example of non toxic masculinity, and I will fight people over it. I've seen someone call Zoro a red flag. I will find you.
I've seen this happen quite often when it comes to characters with certain body types and defining traits, especially in shows with large followings like one piece, where people just tend to equate muscular + likes to fight + likes to drink to a certain archetype of personality without looking at the nuance? In reality, Zoro is a very likeable guy in my opinion (once you get over how terrifying he can be as an opponent).
Disclaimer: I haven't finished the entire show so feel free to write any rebuttals if you think I got anything wrong! Fandom debates can be quite fun.
I also mention Sanzo/Zosan very briefly so feel free to skip over that part if you're not into that ship.
The biggest thing I think people tend to forget is that Zoro is kind. And this one I don't understand how anyone can forget, because it's like an integral part of his character. Sure, his goal of becoming the greatest swordsman is not a path that's without bloodshed. He's not kind in an all encompassing, indiscriminate way, he's kind in a practical way, especially in the world he lives in with the type of life he leads. He doesn't have qualms about killing when necessary. But the motivation behind those actions are never cruel. He wants to be the greatest swordsman, but he's not amassing that skill because he wants power. He's doing it for love of that weapons style and for the childhood dream both Kuina and him had. Does he like fighting? Yeah, but I'm pretty certain it's purely for the competition of skill. And Zoro shows his kindness with how willing he is to help those who need it, in that he usually doesn't use his strength to take what he wants/hurt others but to protect. Even when he was a bounty hunter and earned his moniker of Demon of the East, he was just trying to survive. I'm not sure how people forget that he's a kind person when our initial introduction to Zoro was him agreeing to get tied to a post for a month without food or water to save a little girl and her mother. He's kind in the little ways as well, in that mundane everyday living type of manner, not just in the big, heroic "risk your life" type of way, which I think is important to acknowledge. He didn't have to tell that girl that her food was good. And Zoro is pretty damn good with children - we see that with Chopper, and we see that with that filler episode with Zoro babysitting and - I think there are some more examples but I can't recall them right now. That's a very big green flag in my opinion. The little gestures can matter as much as the big ones. As far as I'm concerned, those traits couldn't be further from the "alpha male" stereotype.
I've also seen people characterize Zoro as just a cool, quiet, man-of-few-words type of guy, and sure, I can see how he would give that impression if all you saw of him was random edits of when he gets serious but honestly, the man is pretty fucking sassy. He's also just - SUCH a 19 year old with all the antics he gets up to with the rest of the crew, and I'm aware he gets much more serious after the timeskip (I haven't gotten to that point yet in terms of watching but I don't care about spoilers so I know the reason behind it), but like. I don't think he lost his snark from some clips I've seen. Zoro is funny, and I think people ignore that too often for the cool guy type of characterization. Not that he isn't cool - Zoro has his moments but that's not all he is. The man gets lost running in a straight line???? He once almost got frozen in wax and decided his priority was to ensure he died in a cool pose. That type of willingness to be silly is not something you find in a stereotypical alpha male type of personality. Like, who are you kidding, he's lame af, unashamed of it, and it's fabulous.
Another thing, granted this is not a common opinion by any means, but on one instance I've seen someone act as if Zoro's some lady killer or some shit and I actually had to pause and stare at my screen in disbelief. Could I see women being attracted to Zoro? Yeah sure, I mean the one example I can think of right now is Hiyori (another example may or may not be me. But then again you knew that didn't you, considering this post is just one giant love letter to Zoro). But does Zoro purposely try to attract women? Uh no? I don't even think the man is straight. He's either aromantic/asexual (very ace of him to not give a shit about romance but leap up in two seconds upon hearing the word "sword") or just gay, cause he exhibits very little interest in romance, or very little indication that he finds women attractive. And I pinpointed attraction to women specifically just cause people tend to assume Zoro is heterosexual and have the audacity to get mad at you if you try to imply otherwise. Which to me is clearly heteronormativity speaking because where. Where is he straight, I don't see it. And sure is there a possibility he may be heterosexual and just unwilling to act on attraction because he has a different goal in life? Yeah sure, but you can't act like that's the only valid interpretation for him. But regardless, no matter what sexuality you headcanon him as, he's still very very far from "manly man with ladies swooning left and right into his muscular arms" type character. I mean if someone swooned into him I'm pretty sure he would catch them on principle without registering any romantic connotations whatsoever. (Note that these opinions do not stop me from being a Sanzo/Zosan shipper, but that's more because I find the concept entertaining. An argument could also be made that Zoro does pay the most attention to Sanji, even if it's to fight him). So yeah, another strike against the whole alpha male type of characterization. Zoro doesn't really give a shit about romance and even if he DID, I am convinced he still wouldn't treat a potential romantic partner as anything but an equal, doesn't matter if that s/o is a man, woman or non binary. And this segways into my next point.
Because Zoro has some very refreshing attitudes about gender, both his own and of other people. This doesn't just tie in with the sexuality/romantic partner thing, it ties into the willingness to be authentic/silly thing, and the "likes to compare skills through fighting" thing. I very much think that Zoro just doesn't really register gender roles much, or he does and he just doesn't care about it. And I'm aware this partially stems from a position of privilege he has as a guy - he doesn't need to care about gender roles and how people view him because he's a man. He wouldn't be short changed for anything if he doesn't notice. While the same luxury is not extended to individuals like Kuina and Tashigi, who were in a field of practice that looks down on them purely for being women. Having said that, Zoro literally just doesn't give a shit who he's dealing with, man, woman or any other gender. If you challenge him, he'll fight you. And the level of effort he gives that fight is usually dependent on ability and the situation. If you annoy him, he'll annoy you back. He has no qualms about snarking and yelling at Nami the same as he would with a male member of the crew. People in the past that have pointed out to him the difference in the way the rest of the world perceives men and women - like with Kuina and Tashigi for example - is met with confusion. And again, this is partially because Zoro has the privilege of not noticing, but honestly even if he did notice, I don't think his personal actions would change. And I find that refreshing. I love Sanji as a character, don't get me wrong, but his whole refuses to fight women schtick is something that annoys me (even if I do headcanon that it partially comes from a place of trauma). And moreover, Zoro gives me the impression of a person that doesn't give a shit if his own masculinity is "compromised", going by the stereotypical definition of the phrase. He does shit cause he feels like it, not cause it's the "manly" thing to do. Yeah, he happens to like drinking, working out - things that are considered traditionally masculine, but I get the sense that if he did have hobbies that were not traditionally masculine, he would just go ahead and do them regardless of what people think of him. His antics pre-timeskip wasn't exactly the epitome of manliness, it was silly and goofy and he has no qualms about it cause it was authentically him. And he wouldn't feel threatened if he were to do anything not in keeping with a "manly" image, even if he wouldn't do any of that of his own volition. Like the babysitting filler episode? The man was in a crop top that said "mama" on the front. I fully believe that if he lost a bet to Nami and had to wear a dress or some other traditionally feminine piece of clothing, or if for some convoluted reason Luffy ordered him to put on a disguise like that for some mission or whatever, Zoro wouldn't give a shit as long as it was comfortable and didn't obstruct his ability to fight. If someone made fun of him for it, he would probably bite back depending on how insulting the person is trying to be, cause not caring about wearing non masculine clothing doesn't mean he would be okay with someone looking down on him, but he wouldn't automatically equate the two to each other without that interference, and that association wouldn't be permanent. Would he choose to wear a dress on his own? Probably not. He does still have clothing preferences and they tend to be simple, practical and comfortable, and with certain clothing pieces, in keeping with his culture. Would he fly into an insecure rage about not being a girl? I don't think so. And that's so far in attitude from the whole alpha male thing that it's not even funny. The whole concept of an identity centered around being an alpha male reeks of insecurity, and Zoro is very secure in who he is as a person.
And this is also why I think Zoro would act differently in a romance than how "alpha males" would act, even if it's with a woman (I still don't think Zoro is straight btw, but just for conjecture). For one he respects people based on ability and if not that, determination and heart, so right off the bat he's not gonna treat his partner as lesser than him by virtue of being a woman. And I've noticed that a lot of heterosexual couples (not all, mind you, but a lot) seem to care more about dating a gender role than dating an actual person. By that, I mean individuals who pride themselves on being a model of masculinity however they define it - usually look for a partner to compliment them in that regard. I find this counterproductive, because your partner is not meant to be a tool/accessory to maintain your image, and also because being the perfect man or woman is too narrow of a definition, and it doesn't exactly leave you a lot of room to live comfortably as a human - with all your fallible moments that don't fit comfortably in little boxes. It's impractical and illogical. If you value maintaining the status quo and assigning responsibilities and roles based on arbitrary rules assigned by society instead of ability, if you care about that more than you care about helping your partner and maintaining a functional life, I don't think y'all are gonna last long. That's just my two cents. But for the reasons listed before, Zoro barely even registers gender roles, and he's a pretty "get shit done" type of person. He's not gonna give a shit. He'll do what he's able to do for the relationship, and he wouldn't feel insecure when his partner does the same, even if it doesn't fit into traditional roles. And considering Zoro's love of sparring/fighting I don't think he would get with a partner that isn't able to give him a run for his money anyways. Another thing that sets him apart from the alpha male stereotype, those guys are terrified of anyone challenging them for their position of "authority", however dubious that position is (and however stupid it is to care about notions of dominance for a relationship. Have y'all seen those interview videos with guys who actually believe that? "I can't date a girl that bench presses more than me cause that means she becomes the dominant figure in the relationship" excuse me what.)
This post is getting overly long so I'm going to end it there. Thanks for reading!
#zoro my beloved#roronoa zoro#one piece#sanzo#zosan#zoro x sanji#but only brief mentions of it#mischaracterization and my annoyance with it
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What is your oppion on ribbun?
OOOH that's Jax/Gangle right? Oh boy you probably aren't asking for this but I feel like doing a big ramble and this is gonna be a long one. CHARACTER ANALYSIS INCOMING!
I'll preface this by saying I don't usually get too invested in shipping. I really like drawing interesting character dynamics tho, so I'll play around with the ships I see without really sticking to one. It's why I tend to draw a LOT of different ships only a few times each.
I'll ALSO preface by saying I really uh. Don't like Jax very much lmao I'm sorry. I'm not opposed to jerk characters in general, but I just didn't think any of his lines were funny. BUT I think that comes down to the fact that we only have a pilot and haven't seen much of their personalities yet. My favorite jerk characters, (Osomatsu, Bender, etc) all balance out their jerkiness by being dorky insecure losers that almost never win in the end so you kinda feel bad for them. I think if Jax ends up being written that way I'll become endeared to him. And goose has revealed before that none of the others actually like Jax so I kinda want to see that.
On the other hand, Gangle is my favorite character. She has barely 2 minutes of screen time but I love her concept so much. A friend called me out for this recently lol but all my BIG FAVS are characters that are themed around strong divided emotions. Pretending they're happy even when they're not, and having a hard time controlling their emotions as a result. (The latest ENA episode was a great example of this. Anyway.) Gangle being a sensitive flimsy pile of ribbons with a literal mask for a face? The fact that the tragedy mask seems to be her REAL face, while the comedy mask is so fragile that breaks if you so much as breathe on it too hard? I find that COMPELLING I want to see a whole series about her honestly.
Pairing her with Jax was inevitable, as is any fandom ship where the characters hate each other in canon. I usually hate this kind of pairing but this time I found it kinda fascinating! I think it's cause we don't really know a whole lot about either one of them so there's a lot of room to explore their characters through it.
I really do feel like Jax could hold a specific resentment towards Gangle. He's obviously not handling being stuck in the circus well, and he's bullying easy targets. He plays dirty. A person with high self esteem doesn't do that. Maybe he takes it out on Gangle because he hates how open she is about her feelings. He's putting on a tough and uncaring front, trying to pretend nothing bothers him, and she's out here being sensitive and fragile? How dare she! He's pushing her to her limits and she still won't harden herself. She doesn't have the energy to! Maybe she feels like she doesn't deserve to defend herself. It's so unhealthy! It's horrible!... And uh, sometimes horrible things are fun to write! DON'T JUDGE ME.
(And just so nobody accuses me of being insensitive here, without revealing too much, I've been in Gangle's place before. That's all I'll say.)
So with relationship stuff oh boy. We can take all those toxic traits to their extremes. But who would be the instigator?
What if Gangle coped with Jax's bullying by becoming more clingy. Becoming used to it.. Seeking him out. After all, he's paying attention to her right? Her warped self image being depressed and isolated in this circus for years would drive her to wanting any kind of stimulation.. does she realize this is self harm? What's it going to take for someone to step in before it goes too far?
Or on the other hand, what if Jax's fixation on bullying Gangle got mixed up in some more complex feelings.. If he really wanted to, I can see him manipulating her into a relationship just to see how many boundaries he can cross. He could have her wrapped around his little finger. Literally. He DOES have some misplaced affection for her deep down. He won't let himself think about it long enough to understand it, he's acting on impulse. She's uncomfortable but thankful for the seemingly lessened cruelty, so she puts up with it. And sometimes, rarely, between the thinly veiled insults disguised as compliments, he says something truly genuine and vulnerable. She can see it. He needs help. He needs love. But they're both hurting each other even more. It's wrong, but they're stuck now.
And now.. for the drama. Nobody can be pushed that far before snapping. As is the usual trope with soft spoken pushover characters, Gangle is a ticking time bomb. And I don't think she'd be willing to abstract entirely because of Jax, at least without clawing her way down.
Here's a fun fact. Have you seen that walk cycle video? Jax is tall, sure, but Gangle is PRETTY DARN TALL TOO. and she slouches. With her ribbons stretched to their full length she would tower over everybody. I want to see her get angry and be SCARY. I want her to stand up to Jax and lash out and scream and see him Genuinely Terrified. Everyone else caught in the crossfire too, covered in ribbon slashes. It wouldn't last forever. If the tension doesn't cause her to abstract she'll calm down eventually, or someone will be forced to break her mask to snap her out of the tantrum. Jax would pretend it didn't shake him at all, but would be noticeably quiet afterwards. Kinda shifting uncomfortably, they both avoid eye contact for as long as possible. His teasing towards Gangle never goes beyond slight ribbing again.
Whew.
Ok uh if you read this far, I don't LIKE the ship but it's a great character exercise! Hah I've thought a lot about it clearly. That being said, i usually prefer sweet cuddly ships myself. I think my favorite is Gangle/Pomni. I haven't seen this one around much, but those two are my favorite characters in the show and I'd love to see them interact! I think they could help each other with their anxieties and it'd be really cute. I don't even necessarily need it to be romantic I just think they'd have a sweet little dynamic together.
Surprisingly I've seen Gangle shipped with Zooble the most even though they haven't talked at all either and Zooble has like.. 2 lines. It might be cute but I wanna know more about them first.
As for Gangle n Kinger, I prefer them to have more of a father daughter type dynamic.
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Abigail Headcanons
I had wrote some of these for my old blog but forgot to save them so i forgot what i wrote and now I have to start over haha
Tw: cursing, brief sexual mention, cheating(not abby), some canon info may be wrong lmao
Is between 5'4-5'8
Mostly because she does give off tall goth mommy vibes but also gives off short angry troll vibes(I'm 4'11 I'm allowed to say this)
I think she's like 22-24
It's stayed at some point that she takes online college classes right? Or am i insane?
I do 100% think she's the wizards daughter I mean it does line up and if she's not then wtf
It's more than just the hair
But even then like isn't it said that she only dyed it ONCE and the color just never went away?
Like I feel like its one of those things where she had to activate the trait for it to show up
Like Idk if you've seen Barbie in a (and a?) Mermaid Tale but like
Barbie(her name isn't barbie but i cant remember what it is) doesn't show any mermaid traits at all until shes a certain age then she does things to trigger it(like going in the water and being able to breathe or her hair turning pink.)
Or traits that have been there already now making sense(her being obsessed with the water and surfing)
For Abigail, she just needed to dye her hair that specific color in order for it to stay in that state
And she has other abilities like being able to see the Junimos when literally no one else but the farmer and the wizard can.
And her love of adventure and the unknown
And i think she is a witchy girl along with Emily
Also the fact that Caroline hung out near the wizards tower then got pregnant with Abby
I think she still hangs out there sometimes or maybe its a mod or maybe I'm delusional(this one is a fact)
N e ways i've gone on too long about this
I think she would study for something like archaeology or something or like game development.
Does play video games as much as she can
Does rage quit
Gets angry when she dies
Though its canon that Abby and Seb would end up together if not with the farmer(I think?)
Highkey a toxic gamer but her outbursts are funny so it's allowed
I think she likes games like Undertale, the Sonic games, Mario, hates Valorant with a passion but still plays even though it only makes her angry
I feel like her feelings for him are shallow
Not in a bad way
But in a theres no one else for me to realistically end up with or crush on type thing
Like unless she's going to date one of the girls(I think Pierre is homophobic) Seb is her only choice
I do sorta ship her with Haley tho (goth gf x pink gf)
Does wish to be in the adventurers guilde but i also think she would be terrified
Also realistically I feel like she knows it wouldn't work out for long. Though she does sometimes go in the upper(lower?) levels of the mines.
100 percent prefers her mom to her dad
I think if she ever found out about the wizard possibly being her father it would make her be the most torn she has ever been
Because on one hand she does love pierre hes the man that raised her and I dont think she would accept cheating AT ALL and it would hurt her to know hes not her biological father
But on the other hand she would find it cool that theres a reason for her weirdness
Like theres a reason she can see the weird creatures in the forest when no one else can(to her knowledge)
Theres a reason for her longing to venture out and explore the unknown
And the wizard is pretty freaking cool seeing as she hangs out next to his tower often
Either showers everyday or once every 3 days there's no in between
Probably does want to travel at some point, maybe when she has her own money to spend.
If pierre wanted her to take over his store when he gets too old she would refuse
Is sorta sad she doesn't have any siblings, but at the same is glad because she only has to worry about herself
Learned to play the drums as a way to let out her anger
Has an okay voice when singing, but doesn't know how to properly hit notes without fucking up her voice
#stardew valley#sdv#stardew#sdv abigail#stardew abigail#stardew valley abigail#stardew headcanon#stardew valley headcanons#sdv headcanons#abigail headcanons#sdv abigail headcanons#stardew abigail headcanons#stardew valley abigail headcanons#sdv shitpost#stardew shitpost#stardew valley shitpost
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i would love to hear about ur Hiro thoughts if u wanna share :3
hiro.... where do i begin...... (btw no coroika stuff sorry. from what ive seen the characterization there does not line up with any of my promo kid brainrot at all LOL. also they turned kayoss into an inkling there lol???)
love him so much you dont even know. i memorized his username (Hirooooo) i think he's cool. i like his inkless office drone title it implies so much about him. projected some of my traits onto him a very long time ago, so he's an autistic trans guy to me. maybe bi. ive mentioned it before but i think he wears his ocho octophones outside of battle and theyre noise cancelling. i think he needs that feature for battles cause oh my goodness there's so many noises in battles sometimes.
of COURSE he uses .96 gal, its iconic as hell. but i think he uses like.. 3 other weapons too. splattershot, mainly because he's been shown with ttek splattershot + he's on the trizooka card (or at least the octoling there has a VERY close resemblance). i think he uses range blaster and dark tetra dualies cause he's been shown with them (the range guess is based on like. 20 pixels from a millisecond of footage though). also i use range and dark tetra..and i thought it was funny
also fun little thought i had the other day: i think he avoids .96 gal deco like the plague. was excited to see it get splash wall but freaked out about kraken royale. picked it up just to find out about the kraken part mid-match and got jumpscared by the transformation. enough to shove somewhere and never think about it again
i dont think he has like, a set in stone team or anything (i dont think any of the splat 3 promo kids do, they all play matches with each other n theyre all friends) but he usually teams up with anemoneno1, takotruck, and c4l4m4r. they have the most toxic synergy ever but thats another story. my interpretation of ane is its own thing too. i think they and hiro hate each other in the friend way. say the rudest shit to each other as a joke then laugh about it.
SPEAKING OF HIS RELATIONSHIPS WITH OTHER PEOPLE. coming out as a hironika lover. i think he loves veronika so much its unreal. kind of boyfail type of way. they share an apartment w/ ane. sometimes i think about a poly thing between them but i like to think ane's just an onlooker to the frustrating chaos that is the two of them pining on each other in the most obvious way possible. theyre so t4t oh my god. (off topic but im a veronika she/they nonbinary believer forever. i think she's also a girl too but i dont know how to explain that. bigender, demigirl?? hard to label wish i could just let people peer into my brain on that.)
ALSO I LOVE NEO 3 VERONIKA BUT HIRO'S THE NEO 3 TO ME SORRY. my url gives this away so fast (hiroshotrepilca.. huh i wonder who hiro is). i think his smallfry friend would have the mohawk haircut. need more neo 3 hiro fanart in my life...
ok thats all i can put into words... a lot of this is going to show up in a thing im writing (I NEED A HIRO. posting it on ao3if anyone cares) but Yeah. sorry for this being sooo long these thoughts have been brewing in my head for like a year
#ask#long post#alex's hiro folder#i have SOOO much more to say but im bad with language so itll be in my head. for now..#his dynamic with veronika and ane is so important to me tho#surprised i dont draw it much. i literallyjust think about it a lot#ive even dreamt about it thats the crazy part
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Heyo Dove! 💖💖💖💖💖💖Thank you for the tag! I'm super excited for this lol🤣
Here are the stuffs:
I'll go by Tabi for the matchup, romantic please, and she/her pronouns.
Describing my personality: ( lol this is from my sis cause idk) Funny, Caring, and concerned for people safety and happiness and a sunshine.
Hobbies and interests: I love drawing and anything to do with art, I love reading and line to collect books. I love anime and manga but rant like manga more lol. I love Asian cultures. I absolutely love learning about skincare ( specifically korean ) and collect lip products 😭. And I like gaming however I'm not very good at it lol
What I'm looking for in a relationship: I want someone that I can feel comfortable around. Someone who doesn't look down on me for my interests and maybe even tries to learn about them. I really want someone who is loyal and hopefully funny ( I even like dry humor) And that it is a equal relationship no partner over partner but just equal.
What I can't stand: Controlling and obsession as well as ignorance or laziness, I can't feel like I'm the only one working for the relationship
Affection showing: does pet names count? Even for platonic relationships I love pet names, physical touch and gift giving
Affection receiving: physical touch, quality time and gift giving
Other random info: enfp, Virgo, toxic trait is that if there is something about my appearance that someone I'm interested likes I change it just to see if they like me afterwards, love the friends to lovers trope and the going to another place and fall in love, andddddddd I like spicy foods but I eat so so so much candy lol.
I hope these all work! Again thank you so much Dove! I hope you have an amazing rest of your day/night💕💕💕💕💕💕
'ello, 'ello! Oh! Look who it is, and looks like he has a gift for you!
Lilia Vanrouge
The two of you met in the chat room of a game you both play. And of course you would also see him around campus, until the both of you put two and two together. Kinda like the Spider-Man meme that’s pointing back and forth really.
Lilia would never look down on your interests, and would join in! You were talking about the special edition of a manga that is super difficult to get your hands on? Boom, it’s wrapped in a semi-pleasing way and left on your desk with a little handwritten note. You said you adored this artist, so here! Enjoy, Tabi-cat!~
Be prepared for a mix of pranks, good jokes, and downright awful dad jokes. Also uses interwebs jokes to “fit in with the cool kids” but they’re super cringey, but in a charming way???
GIVE HIM ALL THE PET NAMES! Lilia would ADORE any and all pet names, and he has a few for you as well! Tabi-cat is probably his favourite though. But he also calls you Sunshine, due to your personality; which he finds adorable.
This is a super cuddly relationship, and Lilia really enjoys that he can let out his cuddle-bug on you. Also appreciates any gifts that you get, or make, him. He’ll get you some cool trinkets that he saw on one of his trips… and his cooking. Do. Not. Accept. The. Food. Gifts.
Dates will either be gaming sessions while taking turns sitting in each other’s laps, or going on little outings. Lilia did see that skincare store that he knew you would be interested in. skincare dates are also a thing, but please don’t do the homemade kind… or just make them by yourself so nothing catastrophic happens.
You are above else, equal to Lilia. He wants the relationship to be equal. He is not above you, and you are not above him. That doesn’t stop him from cherishing the loving daylight out of you though.
He would dye a few streaks of his hair to your favourite colour and/or to match your hair. He would also fully support you in any changes you want to make, but reminds you that he likes you for you.
Hope you enjoy your match-up! Mutuals get all da privleges ^v^
I do hope that you know how to cook though... for your own well-being. If not, well, boi howdy. At least Lilia makes up for it by being a great partner!
#twst match up#dove does match ups#lilia vanrouge#romantic match ups#faye!#the spider did not deter me#mutuals <3#“but i thought you're tabi-cat not a fae?” - lilia probably
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☁︎ HI HAVE U HEARD OF HERLOCK SHOLMES. HAVE YOU SEEN A GUY FAILFLOPPING ANYWHERE ☁︎
☼ saturn, or mare
☼ they / she / he
☼ 18
☼ asexual lesbian
☼ @violexides is my primary blog
☼ my ao3 is riseninsaturn!
☼ profile art, banner photo
☼ LATEST FIC - no atlas to hold the sky (5k LDR klapollo)
•──────────⋅☾ ☽⋅──────────•
❥ my favorite main-line AA character is Klavier, as of right now. Godot, Vera, Apollo, and Lana are major favorite/comfort characters too!
❥ my favorite TGAAC -- and favorite in the whole franchise -- character is Herlock Sholmes. i love pretty much every major character in TGAAC, though, with special favorites in susato, kazuma, and iris.
❥ i ship asoryuu, gina-susato, homumiku, klapollo, blackmahdi, wrightworth, and lanamia! i also enjoy some franmaya, skyeday, and edgelang, as well as a few rare-pair ships. i ship darklav as well but in the way that a scientist may brew a toxic bacteria in petri dishes. (apologies for hyphens i don’t know many of the ship names)
❥ platonically, i like susato & ryunosuke, herlock & iris, herlock & mikotoba, ema & apollo, vera & trucy, klavier & simon b., gumshoe & edgeworth, kay & klavier & sebastian, literally anything with TGAAC characters, et cetera et cetera
❥ my first toxic trait is headcanoning ema skye as straight (unless i find a good fic/pairing to sway me otherwise-- ergo, skyeday). my second toxic trait is thinking larry and iris would actually be a nice couple given a few years and therapy. sorry.
❥ i am a dahlia, daryan, kristoph, and simon keyes enthusiast. not an apologist for any of those four (narration: they are, in fact, a little bit of a dahlia apologist) BUT i could fix all of them!
❥ i tend to deal in localizations, hence why i am saying TGAAC instead of dgs, but i use them interchangeably throughout my posts. i’m pretty consistent on herlock though i just think it’s funny.
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✑ no DNI criteria i just block if i don’t like something :] if you have any concerns or whatever and you DO have DNI criteria you can dm me for clarification, if that’s helpful!
✑ i LOVE asks! i love DMs from mutuals (or inquisitive followers)! i like discord DMs from close mutuals! i do not like discord servers at all! please keep this in mind.
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STREAM 牙琉 響也 〜LOVE LOVE GUILTY!
#saturn.txt#FINALLY i have the trifecta of all my names as tags.#edit a month later: ... 75% are now tags!#saturn.hyakinthos (klapollo)#saturn.judas (the gavin brothers)#saturn.icarus (kazuma/ryunosuke)
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Toxic-Conversation with Paul Walker
K: Good morning.
P: Good morning, Kim. How are things? I’ve been away for a bit but wanted to come in and see how you were.
K: Things are okay.
P: Good. (sits back and puts his left ankle on his right knee) Up for a chat. I’ve been feeding you some ideas that I wanted to talk about but totally cool if you’re busy.
K: I’m always busy but I’m up for a chat if you want. The thing about you dropping things into my…reality is that it’s a whole bunch of stuff that I need to sift through.
P: I gotta be honest and say that when a ghost wants to talk to a person, they try to get as much information into that person’s reality because the moments are more fleeting right now, on that planet (points down) than at any other time.
K: How so?
P: It’s a timing thing. Time isn’t so much in a straight line anymore. It looks more like this sphere with stuff swimming around it and the sphere has to drop into the reality consciousness of someone so the person can sort of grasp what’s floating there that’s important for that moment and that moment only. When the moment passes, the sphere, like a bubble…it just pops.
K: Cool, but if you could hold up on popping the bubble until I get a chat sorted, that would be amazing and really helpful.
P: I’ll hold the bubble for as long as you need.
K: You worked in a very funny way this morning.
P: Like how?
K: Showing me Brittany Spears and the song Toxic.
P: I remember seeing you at the clubs dancing to that. I loved seeing that. It made me smile.
K: Ah, the good ‘ol days but I don’t clubs anymore. Could you imagine??? My poor back.
P: I could imagine it. Still makes me smile.
K: Ha! Right. And then you were feeding me something about toxicity being a human term.
P: Yeah.
K: There are lots and lots of human terms that I’m sure spirit doesn’t really…enjoy.
P: For me, and I only speak for me and not the whole of space and time…
K: Sure.
P: I really really don’t like it.
K: Tell me why.
P: It’s a term that is given to someone with specific traits that makes them less than the person that is calling them toxic. And I get it. There are incredibly bad people with bad behaviors out there but these terms that people are tossing around so easily now, I find unfair and creating disadvantages for both parties. If a person is pointing a finger and calling someone else toxic, I look at the person handing over the judgement and I’m pointing and telling them, you have a lack of boundaries.
K: So, you’re saying in some cases, it’s a reaction.
P: It is. You were telling your friend last night that boundaries aren’t just saying you’re gonna create them. It’s an action. It’s in action. I’m going to do this or I’m not doing that.
K: Yes.
P: Then, if someone is pointing to another and calling toxic without taking action on their end to help support repairing behavior, then it’s toxic against toxic and this is what I wanted to talk about. These terms that are being thrown at people because of misunderstanding or trying to outdo or be better than…that’s toxic. It’s not the person, it’s the behavior and when you look at it that way, there can be a transformation of the whole thing.
K: I get it. For sure.
P: In people’s prayers, they ask “God” (finger quote) or “Archangel Michael” (finger quote) to heal them of all this negativity that isn’t theirs…take it and transform it back to unconditional love for the best of all. Something like that.
K: Yes.
P: But connection goes both ways so if you’re carrying the weight of negativity and toxicity with you thinking it’s someone else’s…you’ve played a part in choosing to carry the emotions or feelings of resentment, frustration and anger over it…are choosing not to create boundaries to stop the behavior and choosing to continue navigating this two-way street. You’re chosen to entertain it by choosing to be a part of it.
K: Wow.
P: Archangel Michael…isn’t gonna just free you of another person’s shit unless that shit is really taking you off your path or it’s really dangerous and that ripple will create danger for other people. What he’ll do is give you the tools to do it yourself because that’s what you signed up for. People want enlightenment. They want to be spiritual. That term…spiritual has its own flavor of toxicity to it as well. Because the spiritual are the first to throw out these terms and use them to cast judgment, blame, and hurt onto others who are already judging themselves, hurting themselves, and blaming themselves enough and that’s where the toxic behavior is coming from.
K: You’ve been seeing this a lot then.
P: It’s crazy, Kim. How these terms are building and building and snowballing to allow for righteousness. I’ve said it before. There are way more good people than bad people on that planet but the bad or picking out what’s bad about someone is what people are so insistent on doing that the good isn’t even seen or acknowledged…validated.
K: People…fine…boundaries. But what about environments or situations?
P: Same thing. Tell yourself, I will do this but I won’t do that, and stick to it. The thing is, people want perfect but perfect means they’re comfortable and they’re staying comfortable in what they recognize. When you throw conflict into it or hard feelings, comfort’s gone but comfort’s gone because you need to start growing and you can’t grow if you don’t get uncomfortable or learn to use the tools that you’ve been given to grow. To keep that comfort or keep yourself comfortable, whatever behavior from another or situation that is telling you it’s time to grow up…it’s called toxic or abusive or whatever the term is.
K: That’s a pretty dangerous stance.
P: Dangerous how?
K: People’s response to it.
P: If it’s a reaction, it’s because I just triggered being uncomfortable and their peace has been disturbed when they don’t want it disturbed. That has nothing to do with me.
K: Okay.
P: Lookin’ in, I can confidently share here that people are created bad because they trigger someone out of their peace and the person who isn’t peaceful is labelling them something horrible like toxic or narcissistic. And it is true that there are narcissists out there that feed on others. I don’t deny that. But it’s a term that has become real loose and loose is not good when you’re on a planet that has people that are in the thick of things…evolving into oneness and playing catch up with an Earth that’s already there. How can you have oneness when people continue to live on the edge of bad and good or people create others in the image of bad and good due to foggy perception of a thing called “truth”.
K: So, if a person is to use boundaries…I will do this…I won’t do that…and puts another in a place where they can’t try to force their ideals or goals on them…is that contributing to oneness.
P: For sure it is because oneness starts with the self and it start with self-love and self-respect. That starts with personal boundaries and those boundaries sort of do that ripple effect and share that with others that are ready. It’s called being a lightworker. It’s called being a wayshower but at the end of the day, it’s just being an example of something true.
K: It’s a tough lesson to learn.
P: It’s a huge lesson to learn but I think we have talked about it in other channels…the person…that part of a human that is the spark of God…and the behavior are two very different things. You can walk away from the “toxic” or “narcissistic” behavior, but you don’t have to stop loving the person. If anything, if a person is behaving badly…they really need that love in their life even if it’s from a distance and includes boundaries that they have to honor. Boundaries for a toxic person…aren’t easy because they never had to connect to another someone with boundaries before. The free reign is over and they don’t like that because they’ve never experienced it before from someone. That’s why the behavior persists. That’s not peaceful for them and will create even more reaction…frustration…anger. But a person that created those healthy boundaries…they no longer are affected by that. I’m rubber you’re glue type thing.
K: Say the whole thing and say it like you’re a kid in a playground.
P: No way. Come on. (waves me off)
K: Please??????
P: (scrunches up his nose) I’m rubber, you’re glue. What you say bounces off of me and sticks to you!
K: BAHAHAHAHAHA!!!!! That was soooooo terrible.
P: God! I sound like a fuckin’ whiner.
K: Like when I was in grade 7 and Leonard…we were just playing around and I took his Walkman or something and he says, I’m gonna tell my mom. I still remember that. It was so ridiculous.
P: I see it. He was a good kid. He just needed a friend.
K: We were friends. He was a good kid. I still remember him. Super cute and he liked hanging out with me so that was a bonus.
P: Small circle.
K: Very small circle.
P: Yeah. So, that’s really all I wanted to come in and talk about. Maybe we can talk about it some more.
K: For sure. Thanks for coming in, Paul.
P: Any time that I get to come in, is a real treat.
K: I feel that.
P: Tomorrow…maybe?
K: Tomorrow maybe.
P: Great. Love you.
K: Love you.
P: Later.
#Paul Walker#Toxic#spirituality#talking with ghosts#channeling#channeling spirit#new age#mediumship#psychic#intuition#automatic writing#message from spirit#mediumship readings#channeled messages#messages from heaven
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My toxic trait is that I kind of love the ads that start with a cartoon woman being treated badly by a cartoon man and it's like LEAVE HIM or ENDURE and then you watch them freeze in a house (why is it always freezing? Why can they only find a shitty broken house?) and the "player" fails to fix shit so they like. Die. I just find them really funny, especially if the woman is covered in mud or has smell lines like what even 💀
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hihi !! i'd love to participate in ur matchup game if ur still taking reqs ! i'd prefer characters from OHSHC (just no honey-senpai please) + haikyu <3
traits: im v shy and prefer listening to others talk !! i also try my best show kindness to all no matter what !! im also a silly lil creative hehe
toxic traits: stubborn, massiveee people pleaser, avoid confrontation bc of fear of abandonment, and struggle to express certain emotions
their traits: affectionate and funny !
their toxic traits: ok idk FJFKFJDJ ig idc too much about possessiveness as long as it isnt extreme yk
goal: honestly just to be able to understand each other rly well at a v deep/intimate level
preferred time: night !! bc everyone goes quiet and the world becomes so peaceful :]
tysm !!<3 sending love to u !
My apologies for the late response my sweet lovely little anon 😭 I had a hair appointment. I hope these results find your appreciation and that something eases your mind today 🥺 from your analysis, I somewhat assumed you're an overthinker and I wish I could assure you but alas...you're Anonymous 😭💀 just remember you're a very kind person! Sending my love back, mwah <3
The balance between you and your matches is perfect and cancels out the flaws one party has with another. He cares for you deeply on an immaculately understanding level, and he doesn't run out of energy. Not from the start of the day, when you wonder if he'll still find himself so sweet to you as he interrupts your thoughts with a soft and loving smile, already questioning you about if you're well, and his affection doesn't stop, even by the peaceful dead of night, no matter how tired either of you may be from everything. It's no longer nights you overthink or worry about who isn't pleased with how you've been to them that day, it's now nights that your thoughts are reassured by someone who will tell you the truth, no matter what you're trying to get across, because he'll understand.
»»————- ♡ ————-««
HAIKYUU!!
Tadashi ALSO being a rather shy type, you two would just grow close in the quiet corner of the loud gym, because you both need SOMEONE to talk about how crazy Tsukki and Bokuto are, right? You two would find yourselves making quite a lot of easy, flowing conversations throughout the school year. (It's nice that you were one of the only people that were kind to him...the people that didn't try and give him a concussion with a volleyball.) On campus, it's probably a lot of current drama or annoying tests and such, but off of school grounds or over summer vacation, there's a lot of stars and uncovered scars, yknow? He's all there to find anyone to share is thoughts with, as self kept as this little bean is. The more you two talk casually, the more he'll understand how you feel without you needing to express your distinct emotions. You will find he won't take it once his limits are pushed, however... he won't care who it is, even if it's Tsukki who's crossed the line with himself or you, he's not going to stand for it. He wouldn't leave you to be on your own with the crowd in what feels more like an empty, desperate room for the world, and Tadashi will lead your head out of the stress- whether you say it or not. You'll find peace together. :)
OURAN HIGH SCHOOL HOST CLUB
Kaoru couldn't help but get a little pissy at his brother whenever he'd come your way and embarrass you a bit with his joking, as good of friends the two of you were of course. He isn't considered very good when it comes to dealing with abandonment either, while he can't compare it to your experience, he can understand the fear of it, as he could never imagine its weight. Being the more mature and comforting twin, he's finding himself searching for a bit of peace of mind quite frequently in the midst of the chaotic host club- feigning a brother romance is tiring. 🫷😭 He understands its difficult to express some things, but he can tell a lot just by looking at you. He finds himself only able to try and reciprocate your kindness, and not asking you to go into the trouble of expressing what's going on, he feels it and he just wants to show you that he doesn't need to know what it is to comfort you. Kaoru is the type of person to never leave a single person in his life, even if it kills him one day. He's glad he won't have to worry about where he's going to end up by following you, because he knows that at the end of the day, you're the only peaceful thing he knows he'll have...sorry Hikaru.
»»————- ♡ ————-««
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hello old friend.
Boy has it been a wild ride since my last time I've written. A lot has happened in the last year. Some good, some bad and some confusing.
I mentioned Tanner in my last post that I wrote so I guess I'll start there. Looking back on that particular moment - I can say that I was self destructive. I went out for Halloween by myself to drink my sorrows away. I was sad, lonely, alone, and with the lingering feeling of not wanting to get my sad on anyone. I should have used that energy and put it into something else, but you live and learn right? I walked right into him after he ghosted me a few months before. I can say now that I was looking for affection and love in the wrong place because he definitely didn't deserve me. But I can honestly say that we reconnected and it felt like no time had passed as we walked arm in arm down the street. I met him again in the bar and he said he's be back. The spoiler alert is that he didn't come back and I proceeded to get drunker by the bar. I then texted him around 3am and said I had had enough whiskey and I was going home. He then offered to walk me to my car which resulted in my one and only one night stand in my life. It felt good to feel something besides pain and sadness and He definitely stroked my ego that night but it was probably a blessing in disguise. As we walked I talked about my upcoming job interview and that I needed my hair cut. I wanted a week after our rendezvous and scheduled a appointment for him to cut my hair. When I showed up to my appointment he looked like he had seen a ghost and told me that my appointment never got scheduled. He then proceeded to ignore me via text the rest of the night. I made my peace with the moment and took it as a learned lesson and never contacted him again. I have random run ins with him through the magic of social media, my phone tends to send me push notifications for info that I don't particular care for. But there definitely is a nail in that coffin.
I finally went back to work and I've gotten two promotions in the same year. It's so flattering and the money is definitely worth all of the bs I put up with on the daily. But I can't help but feel like I'm falling into the corporate America trap. I was poorly trained for the 3rd time. But I do enjoy what I do on the daily, especially when I understand how the system works. I am struggling with school. I have such a deep wish to be finished with my degree but it seems the closer I get, the further it is pulled from me. I'm trying not to get discouraged but I can't help but feel like I'm not moving forward fast enough.
My toxic trait is swiping on dating apps. I can openly admit that to myself. It isn't the communication that is a green light for me but the dopamine I feel knowing that someone finds me attractive. (Becoming widowed definitely puts a strain on your self esteem.) On a lonely night, I found myself swiping on Tinder and ran across a gorgeous man with the most beautiful striking eyes. Brad, 38 (1) - Married, Geeky, Poly, Soft Dom. Our conversation was and is as easy as breathing. We talked throughout the night and into the mornings, most - if not every day. He introduced me to a Polyamorous lifestyle. I poured over books trying to get an understanding of this type of relationship. The more I read, the more I liked the concept. I am able to explore my sexuality, work through my fears of being someone's one and only, and have the feelings of companionship. He is smart, funny, doting, loving, and an amazing friend and lover. I never feel like I can't have any type of conversation with him and I feel respected, cared for and listened to. He honestly has taught me that I am so worthy of being loved and taken care of - Whether it be emotionally, mentally, or sexually. It's mind blowing to think that It's almost been a year and I'm looking forward to the next one.
Somewhere along the lines - I felt incomplete. Brad makes me immensely happy. But in the back of my mind, I know that he can only partly be mine. He has a wife and a son to share his time with. And as expected, I am lower down on the totem pole. He makes a huge effort to never make me feel that way, but it is the reality. Through my self reflection I realized that I think the dynamic that would make me the happiest is to have a nesting parter alongside my partner. Someone who understands the lifestyle but would have more time for me (For lack of a better way of explaining this.) Being a wife was a very large part of my self identity and for the right person, I would consider marriage again.
So Back to the dating scene I went with the approval of my beloved and a came across Steven, 37. (2) I joked over dinner with Brad at one of our favorite restaurants that if I could clone him, I would marry his clone. Well I think the universe heard me because I feel the exact way about Steven with a twist. He is also nerdy, a avid traveler, outspoken, sweet, and respectful. They both give me the warmest feeling inside but Steven is a little more scary for me. (For lack of a better way of describing it.) He is a very recent divorcee who is in the same predicament as I am: We both have a married partner. And the more time we spend together, the more smitten I feel. And it is happening fast considering that we have only known each other since August. We spend evenings together cuddling talking about everything and anything and it feels like he is filling a void that I haven't felt in a while. Hopefully things continue this way because my heart could not feel more full. I do struggle with guilt some days, but for the most part everything still feels great. And as long as I continue to feel great, I'll keep moving forward.
I'm exhausted but I needed a mental mind dump. I'll try to write again soon.
-T
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The main problem with the whole mal vs the darkling thing in regards to being possessive (or really when it comes to any of their traits) is the fact that throughout, the darkling is clearly framed as the villain and his actions reflect that, whereas Mal as supposed to be the good guy and best romantic partner for Alina, and yet he has all these awful character traits and tendencies. So its less about how awful the Bad Guy is (since he's supposed to be), and more about how awful the person that we're supposed to believe is the best option for Alina is. I don't ship either, just my two cents.
Okay well... two things. First, your comment about "its less about how awful the bad guy is, since he's supposed to be", takes every comment I've made about Darkles out of context, which seems fitting since everything Darklina's spout about Mal is out of context. Him being the Bad Guy is fine, and if you like him AS A VILLAIN, and acknowledge all the bad shit he does, then my posts aren't for you. I think he's a very interesting villain, and a lot of the terrible shit he does that I have to keep making posts about make him a good villain, the problem is when the terrible shit the "Bad Guy" does is romanticized and viewed as the reasons why Alina SHOULD have picked him. So, don't assume everyone gets that "hes supposed to be awful". The point my post was making is that Darklina's love to call Mal possessive, but then turn around and act like Darkles literally enslaving her in somehow sexy and romantic. It's fucking not, and it's transparent as hell that y'all romanticize and sexualize the actually possessive character, and then project false character traits onto Mal. It's so transparent, it's almost funny.
But, more importantly, to your second, very wrong point, I wonder how much of the narrative about Mal having "awful character traits and tendencies" is actually a commentary on Mal as a character, or is it just Darklina's lying about things Mal has done and everyone accepting that misinterpretation as canon. Because, if were making a list...
Fuck boy - False! Mal was not a fuck boy! He was an attractive teenager who hooked up with consenting girls his age when he could, and he was not in a relationship during that time. Alina had never told him how she felt, so he is not beholden to her. (Also, nobody seems to have an issue with the fact that Darkles hooked up with Zoya in the show, that doesn't make HIM a fuckboy... interesting) (also also, nobody seems to discuss Darkles literally sexually assaulting Alina, and lying and manipulating her to get her to be physically intimate with him so he can use her... double interesting).
Slut Shames Alina - FALSE! The ever favourite callout line from Darklina's "He's all over you" isn't him slut shaming her. First, he has no idea what their relationship is like at that point, but more importantly, he is making an observation of her status in the little palace and how she has become his tool. He has dressed her up in his colors, made her put on a show for his benefit, and has created a situation where Alina appears to be his. Mal is noting that after months of searching for her, believing she was being hurt, tortured, or worse, when he arrives to save her, she looks like the Darkling's pet. (and, even if he WAS angry because he perceived them to be romantically involved, boy just spent months fighting for his life, lost multiple friends, and almost died to find her, all while coming to the realisation that he was in love with her, and then he shows up, after not hearing from her for months... I'd be pissed as hell too.) Important Note: He even acknowledges that what he said was wrong and tries to apologise, before Alina tells him that he was right. (Shadow and Bone, pg. 286). He also then apologizes, completely unprompted, for what he said. (Shadow and Bone, pg. 297).
Fat Shames Alina - False! This one is particularly laughable to me, because its one of the Darklina arguments that falls apart the second you actually read the scene. They are running for their lives in the forest, and Mal has to hunt and gather to feed them. He is noting that Alina's appetite has increased since he last saw her, and he makes a joke (ya know, how you do with friends) about how it would be easier to keep her fed if she still had her more meager appetite from before. He makes no comment on her weight, or her size, and he is not actually commenting on her appetite in a negative way, he is just acknowledging that it's a lot more work for him now that she eats more. Right before he says the line, the quote even proves that he isn't shaming her or thinking badly of her: "With a bemused expression, he watched as I gobbled down my portion and then sighed, still hungry". He is noting a change in her, and complaining that its made more work for him. If you think thats the same as fat shaming, well... thats a you problem.
Hates Alina's Powers - FALSE!!!! How to begin... do we talk about it was Mal's idea to hunt the stag in S&B, because he knew she needed it to be more powerful so she could stop the darkling? Do we talk about how he vowed to find the firebird for her, even though he was terrified of what all that power would do to her? Do we talk about how he literally died so she could achieve the power she needed to save the world? Or maybe we could talk about how he believed in her power more than anyone else, like when everyone was making bets about her abilities with the Cut and he knew she'd go further and better than anyone else expected her too, or when he tells her that he was never afraid of her powers, only what seeking all that power would do to her (which is literally the theme of the books, that power corrupts and seeking unmatched power can destroy you)? Mal being afraid of what is going to happen to Alina, being protective of her and worrying over her, is not the same as him hating her powers. He exists to help remind Alina of the themes of the story, and to guide her into maintaining her humanity.
Abusive - ... Do I even need to explain this one? Must I deign an explanation as to why this favourite Darklina lie is so fucking stupid, and also totally hypocrisy? No? Because we all know Darkles is actually the abusive one and they're trying to project their own shit onto Mal to further their abuse apologist agenda? Cool. Moving on.
Possessive of Alina - False! Throughout the entire series, Mal is quite literally the opposite of possessive, but yall just cant read. Not only does he quite literally step out of the way and allow Nikolai to court Alina without argument, which is the most direct example of him not being possessive, he also spends two full books believing, and repeatedly saying over and over and over, that they can't be together because he is not good enough for her. Mal believes, fully, that Alina deserves more than him, better than him, because he's just a tracker and a soldier, just a regular man with nothing to offer her but his love and his protection, and she is a Saint and should be a Queen. Possessiveness is the wish to own and control someone, it is literally the opposite of Mal believing that he's not good enough and doing everything he can to ensure that Alina achieves everything and gets everything he believes she is owed. A possessive character would not tell her to tell him to leave because he has nothing he can offer her, no title or land or country or crown. A possessive character would not promise to be the blade in her hand, because he believed he had nothing but the blood he could spill to offer her.
Angry - True! Yeah, omg, you caught us, Mal is ANGRY! Heaven forbid a teenager who is traumatized beyond belief and has to give up everything in his life, his position in the military (he deserted for her), his friends and the job he loved (Mikhail and Dubrov died for him, and he can't be a tracker in the army... because he deserted... for Alina), and, most importantly, he has to give up Alina (she should be Queen, he believes, and he has to give up the future he imagined with the girl he loves, who he was pretty sure loved him back, because she's a saint and queen and he's just a man), and more, is ANGRY. He has to be the one to find the amplifiers that he knows will end up hurting her, because thats what she needs to save the world. He has to sit by while Nikolai treats him like the dirt on his shoe and tries to woo Alina for his own personal gain (because Nikoalai did not love Alina. Maybe he came to care for her, but he proposed and spent all of S&S trying to get her to marry him when it was obvious they were not in love. He straight up says its so that the next King of Ravka can be married to the Sun Summoner. It's a power grab.) and he can't do anything about it. So yeah, Mal is angry. And yeah, sometimes he's even angry at Alina, just like sometimes she's angry at him. But they always find their way back, always apologize and try to be better for each other, and if you think anger is a toxic trait, and not simply a natural human emotion, might I suggest touching some fucking grass?
Idk why you thought I'd stand for Mal slander on my blog, cuz I will not. So, I'm gonna stop there, because I have shit to do today, but I really do wonder how much of Mal's 'toxic' or 'terrible' traits, that make him such a 'bad' love interest for Alina, really comes from Darklina's who refuse to actually read the text critically at all, and instead take everything he does and says out of context to further their agenda that Alina should have ended up as the Darkling's fucking slave forever, because thats the "girl power feminist" ending somehow. Mal supports her, loves her, sacrifices for her at every turn, and does everything he can do, to the point of literally dying for her, to ensure that she can defeat Darkles and save the world. He protects her, and when they end up happy and safe together on the orphange that they've rebuilt to help the children that were victims of Darkles war and genocide, he spends his days bringing her tea and cakes and flowers, kissing her silly under the stairs in the view of all the teachers, and calling her names like beauty, beloved, cherished, my heart for the rest of their ordinary life together, if love can ever be called that.
#Malina#anti darklina#malyen oretsev#mal oretsev#shadow and bone#if yall could just learn to fucking read... i am begging you
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Hold My Hand- Illumi x Reader
OMG thank you! My first international fan! Thank you for this wonderful prompt! This was requested by @illucilfer .
Summary: Today’s story takes place in a 1950s diner by a frequently used Interstate; Interstate 95. We know this dinner for its delicious hamburgers, hot dogs, milkshakes, and jukebox records, but every night one Patreon never returns home. A few men who were angry about your recent arrest have shot you both. As you both stare at each other exchanging mental signals, everyone around you tries to help you to the hospital. Y/N is narrating the story. I seem to have fewer grammar errors that way. FYI, Bold and italicized font will reference a thought or flashback.
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The leaves have turned bright yellow and orange, fluttering every second to the ground. I could hear little children a while away laughing and playing in the community park; throwing up the leaves, jumping into piles, and throwing them at each other. The smell of freshly baked donuts brightened everyone’s mood. All you had to do was take one bite and your face would brighten and crack a smile. Dining at Cupid’s Kitchen will always have your heart and interest.
Interstate 95 was always heavy with traffic during this time of year. The folks of Dallas celebrated mulch annually. The “Mulch Fest” was a street fair that stretched 1.5 miles to the east that contained music, drinks, farmer panels, homemaker Q&A, and other activities that southerners enjoy. Illumi and I are only here because of an unfinished assignment. We have worked night and day for countless days trying to catch Jack “Da Hamor” Gilberton, but he was nowhere to be found. Eventually, I allowed my anger to get the best of me and made the executive decision to take a day off. I barred Illumi from searching, tracking, or any form of hunting for our target. The life of a bounty hunter and an assassin can thrill, but it can drive you insane if you allow it.
Ironically, Illumi and I both enjoy fall. It is perfect for cuddling (although he acts as if he’s too good to cuddle), wearing creative hoodies, going to pumpkin patches, and attending apple orchids. I tend to “lose my cool” when we have dates there. When I was a child, my family did not go on trips like these because they were over an hour away from our home and I had 5 siblings. But once I made money for myself, I made it my mission to go to one at least 5 times out of the year. Illumi enjoys the different fudge, hot cider, and candy apples. He almost broke a tooth on one!
“Say cheese snag-a’-tooth!”
“Stop it. It’s not funny!”
“It is! Could you imagine if you lost your two front teeth? You’d look almost adorable as you did in the 1st grade!”
“How did you know about that?”
“Duh! It happens to everyone, but your mother showed me the pictures, of course.”
“Curses!”
Illumi’s sweet tooth is just like Killua’s; both have a weakness for chocolate. Except, Killua will admit defeat while his older brother keeps denying it.
Cupid’s Dinner has been in Dallas for over 55 years. A black woman established it in 1945 by the name of Mary-Lou Benson. Since then, Mary’s family has been running the shop, making sure all of her customers are happy with the service. During the turn of each season, Cupid’s Dinner gives its customer's food options based on the season. The fall options include donuts, candy apples, different flavored cider, fudge, and hot coffee specials. As much as everything looked appetizing, I could not order it all. Our server, Little Ben, placed our drinks in front of us and handed us the menu. I could tell he was happy with his line of work, just as I was to be with Illumi.
“You all take your time. I’ll be back in five.”
Ilumi glanced on both sides of the room, scanning for Jack Gilberton, already forgetting the agreement we established.
“Illumi, what are you doing?”
“Huh?”
“You keep looking around like you’ve seen Da Hamor. Eat your donut and relax, sweetheart.”
“I cannot relax. I must stay on alert.”
“If I can relax, so can you. It’s not that hard.”
“Fine. If I die, it’s on your head… literally.”
The jingling bell rang almost every second when a customer walked in. It was a joy to everyone's ears; the spirit of Mary Lou-Benson was alive and well. An overwhelming feeling of love seemed to have overtaken the diner. After examining the bistro for quite some time now, each customer had been using their cellphones at the table instead of chatting with their families. Many traditional families hated that about this generation but they should be open to new traditions forming. Illumi dislikes using cell phones or tablets at the table unless we use them for missions. He has emphasized how rude it is to be surfing the web about utter nonsense while someone is speaking. This is a pet peeve of his, something I’ll never step on his toe about. Although I think that is overdoing it, I respect it.
Little Ben served our table quickly, leaving us with two dishes of a classic chicken sandwich, kettle chips, one chocolate, and vanilla milkshake. Milkshakes were my weakness; I nearly foam at the mouth when I see one. When I found out that Illumi had NEVER had a milkshake, I almost fainted.
“No. I’ve never had a milkshake.”
“Huh? You’re missing out, pal.”
“What’s the big deal? Isn’t it frozen milk?”
“Not just frozen milk. You can add many flavors, toppings, and whip cream!”
“Well, then. You’ll have to show me sometime.”
We thanked Little Ben for his service as he clocked out for the day.
“I have to admit these sandwiches look very appetizing.”
“You can say that again!”
Before I nibbled on my sandwich, I wanted to take a moment and adore the man before me; Illumi Zoldyck. A man full of mysteries, professionalism, skill, and talent. His enormous eyes were immersed in the large pieces of chicken in between the sourdough bread. He licked his index finger vigorously; allowing the homemade honey mustard to drip enough from the bread to the plate in between licks. Just the sight of him actually relaxing for once has blown me away. For once, Illumi Zoldyck could be himself and I had the privilege to witness it.
“Um… why are you staring at me? Do I have food on my face,” he asked; violently wiping his mouth off with a provided cloth napkin.
“Oh! Ha, ha; no reason. I wanted to see your reaction after drinking your milkshake. That’s all.”
“Why? It’s just a drink.”
“Whatever you say, babe.”
“Babe? What happened to LuLu or Illumi-Lu?”
I gasped and pretended to be surprised… although I was a little.
“I did not know that you liked those pet names. I assumed it mortified you.”
“Who told you that? That never rolled off my tongue. “What I said was” — He bent closer to the table and to me; glancing both to the right and left to ensure no wandering ears were around — “I prefer Illumi-Lu to be said in the bedroom and LuLu when we’re alone, like how we are right now.”
“Aww…. ok,” I yelled in excitement.
“Don’t blow it out of proportion, alright?”
“Yes, sir.”
As we ate, Illumi hummed along to the tune that played a few times on the restaurant's jukebox. Illumi and I were born in the mid-90s, but listening to 50s music was a part of his aesthetic. I was told that he had an “old soul” which sounds romantic at first until you realize how men were during that era. His raging temper was a noticeable toxic trait, but it has drastically improved. Nonchalantly sipping on his milkshake and then eating more of his chips, he grazed the soft part of his left hand over mine as he continued to hum.
“What’s the name of this song? You seem to know it rather well.”
“Put your head on my shoulder, a famous song from the 60s. I heard my parents sing it once and since then, they have addicted me to it. Do you like it?”
“Yes, in fact, I love it. All of this is—”
“A surprise to you? Well, enjoy it while it lasts because once I find Jack Gilberton, this side of me will hide for a while.”
“Understood.”
Damn! I was just feeling connected to him again!
The music swelled; everyone seemed to be happy. Not an evil spirit insight to disrupt this beautiful moment. For once in my life, my raven-haired beauty actually held my hand tight, stole a few of my barbecue kettle chips, and gazed into my eyes harmlessly. His lips brushed against both of my hands, ever so lightly placing kisses on both sides of them. Illumi’s gentle smile warmed my heart as my lingering thoughts of hope stayed intact.
The welcoming bell jingled again. Two men in black leather jackets, stone-washed blue jeans, and tattooed all over their arms came into the diner. The men seemed to be bikers who had just left their own “spot” but one thing struck me as they continued to walk towards the staff. They both wore sunglasses when the sunset for the day. Not to mention that the lights were not dim in the diner and the moon was as bright as ever. The second man had his eyes glued in my direction. My heart beat faster as I wondered if Jack Gilberton had found us. Could you imagine?
Put your head on my shoulder
Hold me in your arms, baby
Squeeze me oh-so-tight
Show me you love me too
I am used to coming in contact with enemies on my hit list, but given Jack’s criminal history; I felt like I may not survive his attacks. Illumi will survive, but just barely. Both men approached the checkout, crowing over Little Ben’s sister. She was a short woman but full of might, and I could tell by the shakiness in her voice she was frightened. I wanted to step in so badly, but I didn't want to blow my cover just in case it was, in fact, Jack Gilberton. After I assume, ordering food, both men stood by the entrance, blocking it from others from entering and leaving. The sound of their old, beat up-lighters crackled as one lit a joint and the other lit a cigarette. This horrid smell ruined the atmosphere because they were not in a designated area and it drowned out the lovely aroma of the food being served.
“If you gentlemen would like to smoke, you need to go outside. There is no smoking in here.”
“What? You think you’re better than me because you don’t smoke?”
“Huh? I never said that, sir. I asked for you to go outside. Not all of our customers can deal with it.”
They did not move a muscle. The sound of their mucous laughter made everyone’s stomach turn. They laughed at the young girl and called her many slurs. Little Ben’s sister didn’t flinch, nor did she cry; she remained still, staring at the men. I had just enough of their obnoxious behavior.
“If you do not leave, I will call the police.”
“The hell you won’t.”
Put your lips next to mine, dear
Won't you kiss me once, baby?
He drew a gun from his left side. He aimed it at Little Ben’s sister and demanded that she emptied the drawer. She refused. Her stone, iron will reminded me of Illumi; no matter the circumstance, they remained intact, determined to fight until the end. Bravery is always encouraged, but too much will cause your life to be taken away. Little Ben’s sister grabbed a fake till that they kept under the real one and threw it at both men. Fake money fluttered everywhere in the small diner, mimicking confetti. Gunshots rang in all directions as the imbeciles recklessly shot, aiming for Little Ben’s sister. Everyone threw themselves on the ground to avoid being shot, but luck cannot spread itself throughout an entire room of people. A young child, an older man, and another worker were shot in their lower leg. Blood reflected from the ground as it continued to seep. Ignoring injured civilians is a jackass move and continuing to deny the fact would prove that the oath I pledge to meant nothing. Sure, bounty hunters must remain hidden, but if someone is injured, I must help them.
The child was lying lifeless on the polished marble floor. He would not respond to my shaking or my silent whispers. When I rolled him over, my heart broke into a million pieces. This child had no chance of survival; a few bullets struck his chest, one just inches away from his heart. A tear rolled down my cheek.
“Why must the good die young,” I whispered to myself.
“... Because snitches get stitches.”
Before I could gain sight of who stated this utterly corny response, I felt an overwhelming amount of pain in my lower back. It felt like a million tiny needles were jabbed so far through my skin that they entered my intestine. I could still hear, but my body would not move. I tried and tried, but my brain would not signal my legs.
Move! Move, damn it!
It’s odd; I could hear myself talk, but my body would not move at all. The sound of another thudding body made my mind jump. My heart had already been pounding enough to try to resuscitate my organs to move, but a familiar semi-blurring sight of none other than Mr. Illumi Zoldyck cleared my sight. My brain went wild. I didn’t know if Illumi died or if he became paralyzed, but one thing is for sure. We finally made eye contact that felt special; something I hadn’t felt since the day I met him. Our contact felt like magnets; an unbreakable bond. Suddenly, my icy hand felt warmth around my palm and fingers. Illumi simultaneously fell in a way that connected our hands. Our unbreakable bond, the warmth of his fingers laying on top of mine, and the gaze we shared somehow made me feel like it was just the two of us alone. I could hear his thoughts loud and clear; thoughts that came from the heart.
“Please help me. Before it’s too late, LuLu,” I cried, thinking I was going insane. “I don’t want to leave if it means leaving you behind.”
“I’m not going anywhere. Not without you.”
“Please! I want to live a life. Life as a bounty hunter, build a support system to our children, and a good lover is all I want to be.”
“You are a warrior and so am I. We have been through worse. This is nothing.”
Mere eye contact is all we need to exchange wandering conversations. The bond that we’ve created is something so strong that I haven’t realized it until now. The warmth emitted from his loose grasp seems to lose its effectiveness. It blurred my vision beyond recognition, leaving Illumi as a near figment of my imagination.
“Oh no. I guess this is it.”
My vision darkened. Illumi was slipping away as my lingering thoughts almost made my heart give out from exhaustion. I was ready to accept my fate, but it seemed like fate had other plans. My vision was still darkening by the second, but my sense of touch remained there. Smooth fingers outline my arms, torso, and chest. I heard muffled voices yelling and screaming about calling for assistance, but I didn’t care if they came or not. I made peace with my life’s end. Bit by bit, my breathing slowed down, but my sense of touch remained heightened. I felt a rubber glove touch my face and neck, examining it for any damage.
The jukebox continued to play Illumi’s favorite song, Put Your Head on my Shoulder. I remembered the day I laid my head on his shoulder; boy, what an endearing moment that was. It was something I took for granted, something I should have savored, for I never knew that this moment would have happened. The song grew muffled by the second verse. That verse repeated every time I tried to force myself to take what felt like my last gaze at my raven-haired beauty.
Just a kiss goodnight, maybe
You and I will fall in love (you and I will fall in love)
-FIN.
A/N: Since you’ve made it to the end, I’ll say something. The reader did not die in the end. They were later revived at the hospital.
#hunter x huner headcanons#hunter x 1999#hunter x hunter#hunter x meme#hunter x reader#hunter x 2011#illumi x reader#illumi x y/n#illumi zoldyck#hunter x hunter x illumi#illumi hcs#illumi hunter x hunter#illumi headcanons#illumi#illumi fluff#illumi angst#hxh chrollo#hxh hisoka#hxh#shiro phantom vox creates#100 followers event#100 followers#100 days of productivity#writing#writers on tumblr#send me an ask#requests closed for this event
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beyond the story: bitchin’
Hi friends! I hope you are all staying safe and healthy during these tough times! I really wanted to put something out there as a thank you to just how much support Bitchin’ got. You guys really are incredible. So, although this story has come to an end, I wanted to properly close the Bitchin’ chapter by giving you all a behind the scenes look at Bitchin’ and everything that went into writing it. This includes hidden easter eggs, backstories, alternative plot-lines, and a short drabble of the Bitchin’ cast 10 years after the story’s end.
Without further ado, please enjoy and thank you again for all your love. You have all of mine.
CHAPTER ONE – PARTNERS
Ah, yes, the start of this whole wild ride. I’ve always loved the whole nerd/popular person trope in fanfics, so it was only a matter of time before I tried my hand at it too. One thing I was adamant about was not making this a “popular person turns nerd hot/confident/better” fic as its kind of one of my least favorite cliches. With that in mind, and knowing that I was going to allude to TATBILB’s contract, I decided that I wanted Y/N to gain as much from the deal as Jungkook did. No blackmail, no just agreeing for the hell of it – Y/N was going to further herself and her dreams given the opportunity.
The beginning of the chapter is where the two are most separated and dissimilar throughout the whole story. It wasn’t that they were fundamentally different, it was that they approached life differently. Y/N was frustrated at how superficial Jungkook seemed, because she believes there is much more to life than just kicking your feet up and cracking jokes.
On the other hand, Jungkook didn’t understand why Y/N was so tense and on guard. To him, life was meant to enjoy and not take so seriously. Which makes sense, given that he grew up with minimal rules and minimal worries (bare minimum partners wassup !)
“So, do we have a deal? Partners?” There was mischievous timber to his words, the kind that made you feel as if this would all later come back to bite you in the ass.
Pushing that pestering thought away, you took his hand into yours, holding his eyes as you gave it a firm shake.
“Partners.”
God, this bit. I knew from the minute I wrote it that I was writing the ending of bitchin’ along with it. I knew this was exactly how I was going to end this story, bc the word partners has multiple means right? In chapter 1, this meant business partners, but in the final chapter… it means life partners. Idk, I’m just still really happy with this writing decision :D
CHAPTER TWO – THE CONTRACT
Dearest Yara. We meet her in chapter two don’t we? Yara is completely based off of my irl best friend Yara who is a writer and who helped me A LOT with this story. She was my biggest supporter throughout figuring out this crazy plot. It was initially only about seven parts, but with her help I managed to bump it up to 10! Everybody say thank you Yaraaaa.
You were angry, that much was evident to her. Yara was sat in your shared dorm’s living room, a thick blanket engulfing her small frame. You briefly glanced towards the TV, it was tuned into MTV, the familiar music video of Every Breath You Take by The Police playing, before directing your glare back onto the copper-haired girl.
The song reference is a direct allusion to writer Yara’s fic, which is one of my favorite fics by her. She was actively writing it around the start of our friendship so it only felt right to pay respects to her. The introduction of her character felt necessary imo bc I wanted to make sure Y/N had a life outside Jungkook. Plus, I got to use the scenes between the two girls as a way to reference the music and culture scene. Yara is especially a fan of the powerful women in the music industry at the time, i.e., Madonna, Annie Lennox, Cyndi Laupner, etc.) Yara is a raging feminist and believer in sexual freedom and libery for women, we do in fact have to stan.
“How old do you think your sister is?”
“Hey, don’t sass me. For your information, Lyanna still has all her Care Bear tapes. She threw a hissy fit when my mom tried to give them away last Christmas.” Yara recalled.
Lyanna is one of writer Yara’s past pseudonyms. She always used to joke about how whenever she read it, it was confusing because there was Y/N, Yara and Lyanna, which were technically all her lolol.
FUNNY STORY ABOUT THE CONTRACT I INSERTED INTO THIS PICTURE… Twitter found it and made it into somewhat of a meme because no one knew it came from a fic rip. I was actually rly embarrassed and even wrote some posts about how much twitter scared me on my blog LMAO. but THEN weirdly enough, I actually stumbled upon a small community on twitter who actually found my fic and would TWEET ABOUT IT!!! LIKE REACTIONS TO EACH UPDATE!!! I wish I could go back in time and remember how giddy I was the first time I found a tweet about my fic. The fanfic community on twitter gave me a new love for the site (which I had previously had removed myself from because of its toxicity) and I have met so many wonderful people because of it. People even made themselves a little twitter group chat to talk about my fics, and now we are all friends! I miss posting a chapter of bitchin’ and refreshing my twitter feed as all my mutuals would post memes and live tweet their reactions. God that made me so fucking happy.
CHAPTER THREE – THE ROLLERSKATING DATE
I love the bickering in this chapter, because unlike the bickering in the first chapter, it’s actually less hostile and more playful. Y/N is slowly letting her guard down to the very persistently charming Jungkook.
“Woah. Family of six, huh? So you have siblings then.” He noted.
“Yep. Three.”
“Tell me about them.”
Looking up from where you were slipping on your second skate, you met Jungkook’s eyes, surprised to see genuine interest in them.
I actually originally had Y/N brush him off here. I was going to wait until the drunk party scene for Y/N to open up about her family and relationship with her sisters. But then I kind of thought to myself… Why? Y/N made peace with it and doesn’t hold onto those insecurities anymore. And objectively, Jungkook hasn’t proven himself to be a bad person so… I let Y/N open herself up to him.
“Then there’s the twins, Rosa and Lia.”
“Hold on. Twins? Wait… did they go to our high school?” Jungkook asked, his interest in this conversation doubled.
“Yep. They were two grades above us.” You confirmed.
“Oh shit, yeah, I remember your sisters, they were mad hot.” Jungkook let out a low whistle, before stiffening, flashing you an apologetic look. “Uh, in a totally non-meathead way.”
You offered the scared-looking boy a small smile, shaking your head.
Some of y’all notice but, Rosa and Lia are a blatant homage to my name: Roselia. ACTUALLY some form of my name can be found in every one of the rewind series fics, including upcoming ones. I’ll give a cookie to whoever can find every single mention hehe.
“I told you it was dumb.” You laughed nervously.
It wasn’t that you cared much about what Jungkook thought but you had a feeling a guy like him, who was popular and carefree, wouldn’t be able to sympathize in the way you would like him to.
“No, I’m just… surprised, that’s all.”
Jungkook certainly was surprised. You had built up quite the impression on him from the very moment you two met. It was hard to imagine that the girl who was so unapologetically herself was ever unsure or insecure.
Somehow, the idea tugged at his heart, as if he understood you more if only just a little.
From the get go, Jungkook was extremely drawn to just how confident and secure Y/N was in herself. I knew I wanted Y/N to be unapologetically sure of herself and in her abilities. Something I didn’t want, however, was for frat boy!jungkook’s only personality traits to be liking sex and being a cocky bastard (although I am a big consumer of that trope heh). Jungkook is actually canonly incredibly insecure. He lacks a real sense of self, which is why he is so desperate for Kiri back. His relationship with Kiri at that time was a big part of what he thought was himself. He has somewhat of low self esteem tbh which is why he’ll go back to a woman who treated him unfairly. That’s why he comes off the way he does in the first chapter and why Y/N thinks he has a big ego... he’s overcompensating. He finds it so endlessly fascinating that Y/N, in all her confident glory, was actually once super insecure. He admires her all the more once she opens up about her past.
“Oh, Rosa is an intern for our hometown’s newspaper but between you and me those assholes don’t even let her write. She does coffee and burger runs for men in charge. And Lia sells ice cream at the mall.”
“What about your brother?” Jungkook asked.
“He’s training to be a cop just like my dad.”
“And your mom?”
“She works at a convenience store.”
All their careers resemble people in the latest Stranger Things season (Nancy, Steve, Hopper, and Joyce). Fun Cameo there.
“What’s wrong?” You wondered, following his eyes.
“October 16th, 1985. 6:48PM.”
“Yes. That’s today’s date and time. What about it?” You pressed, growing confused.
“Remember it.” He warned.
“Why?”
“It’s when I fell in love with you.”
This iconic line I actually got from the real Jeon Jungkook himself. While Jungkook wasn’t actually in love with Y/N here, it certainly was a cute way for him to express his admiration for her.
OH HERE’S A FUN FACT: the hickey scene at the end of this chapter where JK and Y/N kiss for the first time was actually supposed to be Yara giving Y/N the hickey like the best friend she is. Ultimately I went with JK giving it for... smut purposes... ≖‿≖
CHAPTER FOUR – THE HALLOWEEN PARTY
The decision for Y/N to be Freddie Krueger came from me planning to be him for Halloween. And I was! JK as Glen Lantz just followed naturally. I’ve seen some great edits of him as the character. Truly chef’s kiss.
I really liked that Jungkook came over to the girl’s dorm to get ready. I didn’t want a scene where Y/N was thrown into a situation she was uncomfortable with which is how much Nerd At A Party Scene go so made sure Jungkook stayed by her side throughout the part, going out of his way to introducing her to the people he cared about.
Tae’s character came in when I realized I needed a way to actually put Y/N’s event in motion. He was the missing link and BOY did you guys eat his character right up huh. Love that for me.
Another thing, the confrontation with Kiri was so hard to write guys, I reeaaaally struggle with girl conflict. GIRLS SHOULD SUPPORT GIRLS. However, not everyone gets along in real life so I went with Kiri being more along the lines of petty rather than outwardly a cunt to Y/N. Realistically, Kiri is popular and well liked among the greek life so being unkind to someone she hardly knows wouldn’t make sense. There’s definitely tension between these two but I tried my best to steer away from the typical cat fight/revenge porn/public humiliation trope most movies seem to follow.
CHAPTER FIVE – THE FIRST TIME
Introduction to Erik!!!! It was really important to me that Y/N had a life before Jungkook. That's why I wrote in Y/N having a fiancé. She’s not opposed to love, she just has reshifted her focus. She knows what she wants and is choosing to focus on that, which why when she realizes she’s falling for Kookie she’s so hesitant to admit it because she’s fallen down that road before. Even though Jungkook treats her with respect and acknowledges the parts of her she’s most proud of, she just isn’t willing to possibly give up her passions for love. Which is why she doesn’t immediately confess to him, even once she’s sure she loves him.
“I’m serious, nerd. You’re like… um… the sun!” Jungkook marveled, eyes growing full as the realization dawned on him.
“The sun?” You laughed.
“Yeah, like… you’re this bright, beautiful thing that seems like it’s here in front of me but is really light-years away.”
Jungkook was drunk, and although you were sure he was making more sense in his head, you couldn’t help but feel your face grow hot, unsure of how to react to his drunk analogy.
“You’re the sun, Y/N. You make the world turn for you. Never orbit for anyone else.”
And suddenly, you were kissing him, for no other reason other than you wanted to and that it felt like the right thing to do.
No real commentary here. Just love this bit. It’s probably my favorite interaction between them two ‧⁺◟( ᵒ̴̶̷̥́ ·̫ ᵒ̴̶̷̣̥̀ )
“Also… She’s, uh, currently dating Eunwoo.” You told Yara.
Your best friend blinked, silence falling over her.
“Yara?”
“Good for her.” She perked up almost forcibly. “Let her put up with his annoying ass.”
Yara could see the way your expression had turned dubious as if you didn’t believe her nonchalant act.
Yara turned up her nose defensively, “What?”
Ugh yes, some character development from Yara.... the flavor ! Yara (much like Y/N and JK) also struggles with love. She has a real fear of commitment and if far more comfortable with casual sex than relationships. She did develop actual feelings for Eunwoo, she just wasn’t ready for that kind of commitment so she cut him off. Fleed the scene if you will. Typical gemini smh my head.
"I don’t think the contract mentioned orgasms.” Jungkook smirked as you released his thumb.
“I say we let it slide.” You shrugged, leaning into him casually.
“You think?”
“Totally. Think of it as… a bonding activity.” You joked, resting your chin on his shoulder, peering up through your lashes.
“Damn, we’re really committed to this fake dating thing, huh.”
You laughed in the way that you hated, but Jungkook loved; it was loud and abrupt, but it genuine, and it was you.
“What can I say, I’m a method actor.” You sighed dramatically, causing Jungkook to grin before pressing a kiss to your nose, simply because he liked the way it always seemed to make you smile.
GOD THEY’RE SO WHIPPED FOR EACH OTHER ITS DISGUSTING!!!!!! I’m really happy I decided not to make sleeping together a big deal and I got a lot of feedback from you guys agreeing! I had a lot of fun with these two’s sex scenes knowing they could do it whenever they wanted.
CHAPTER SIX – THE STEM EVENT
I started the scene with smut BUT I wanted to point out that much of their time spent together is at Y/N dorm, Jungkook either napping, hanging out or doing work as Y/N would study like she always did. I liked the idea that Jungkook would get bored and would want attention from Y/N because she was so focused. Idk, I just wanted to write a love story about two people spending time together and figuring out how they fit in each other’s lives as opposed to some dramatic I mEeT HiM aNd mY LiFe bEcAmE cRaZy. There’s nothing wrong with that plot line, I just didn’t want that for these two dorks. I wanted Y/N to interact with JK’s scene and crowd but not give up her own which is why most days JK and her just lounged around in her dorm studying.
Also, I don’t know how the teacher/student roleplay made it into the smut, it just did, no further questions (ʃ⌣́_⌣́ƪ).
Then the event scene.
“You’re whipped, dude! Seriously.”
Jungkook felt his face go red, “Shut up, no, I’m not.”
“Hey, I’m not judging. I get it. That’s your girl.” Taehyung shrugged. Jungkook placed a hand on the fold up table in front of him, staring down at the information pamphlet you had worked so hard on.
“She’s just… so fucking driven and passionate about everything she does. Sometimes I look at her, and I’m just like… holy shit, what am I doing with a girl like her? I feel like she’s totally out of my league and being with me is holding her back but— I dunno, man. I just… really like her.” Jungkook revealed, voice growing small.
An unexpected wave of tenderness fell over the two boys, Taehyung throwing an arm over his little brother’s shoulder.
“I’m happy for you, bro.”
Jungkook didn’t know it just yet but dude was talking from the heart and, is in fact, totally whipped :’c
I loved the confrontation scene between the boys and Eunwoo because the boys standing up for Yara really did make everyone feel like a friend group, not just some character who happen to exist at the same time. It wasn’t just Y/N and Yara and one side and the boys on the other. They would all become friends, which is ideal to me. A boyfriend who likes your best friend and considers her a friend so you can all hang out??? Yes please.
Initially, irl Yara and I had noooo clue if Yara would end up with Eunwoo or not. That was actually the original goal actually. But after this chapter four, you guys made it ABUNDANTLY clear that you guys wanted to see Taeyara, despite the two never even meeting! Honestly, it wasn’t until this chapter was written that we decided for sure that Eunwoo was out of the picture for Yara. Part of me really wanted to keep Yara single, but irl Yara insisted on dick and frankly, she’s right. Bitchin’ Yara deserved a shot at love. She definitely has her own story outside of Bitchin’ and will experience a lot of growth in the future.
“God, I know. I do not miss that temper of his.” She chuckled, her words piquing your interest.
“Temper?”
“Oh, yeah. Have you seriously not experienced it yet? He’s got some gnarly anger issues. Not to mention all the lying…” Kiri paused suddenly, straightening up as she flashed you an apologetic look. “Yikes, I’m sorry. I totally should not be telling you this. I’m not trying to be that gross girl that shit talks her ex to his current girlfriend.”
Miss Kiri, Miss Kiri. She really acted up this chapter didn’t she. There was a lot of discussion about whether or not those things she said about Jungkook were true. Which was exactly what I wanted hehe. We come to find out that Kiri had definitely stretched the truth. She really is good at manipulation and understanding how people think and it’s why she is in the role that she is in. Messy queen.
CHAPTER SEVEN – THE ROOFTOP DATE
This entire chapter was inspired by High School Musical with Troy and Gabriella’s rooftop garden scenes. This was my shortest chapter and honestly, probably not my strongest. I definitely went into writing this with zero concept of what I actually wanted to happen. Usually when I write my chapters I have a 4k long outline of it beforehand that I go off of. Not this one though. I really just winged it and I tried my best to write a chapter that really showed off (dialogue wise) just how this couple bounces off each other. I do really like some of the banter they have in this chapter.
You had taken note a little wooden popsicle stick poking up from the soil of the yellow flowers. Acacias, they were marked. Pulling your knees up to your chest, you considered his words.
Yellow acacias stands the value of true friendship and can indicate a secret love! I thought that was very appropriate given these dummies' relationship.
“So, you probably know why I brought you here.”
You nodded.
“You’re proposing, right?”
“Yeah, I– oh, shut up.” He laughed, the serious mood shattering as you joined him.
Even though I knew they were going to have a semi serious talk, what with Y/N asking about what Kiri had told her, these two dufuses realistically are just too comfortable with each other to stay serious for too long.
“Hey, I said that out of frustration, I didn’t really mean it. I’m sure she’ll come crawling back soon.” You attempted to comfort him, hoping to sound sincere.
“Even if that’s true, I’m not entirely sure I want that anymore.”
“What?” You blinked. Jungkook shrugged.
“What about us?” He met your eyes, causing your breath to hitch.
“What about us?”
Jungkook stared at you for a moment, noting the way the timber in your voice had become higher pitched as if panicked.
MORE FUN FACTS LMFAO: I typically do this thing with unplanned chapters where I just go for it and write and usually it works out. But when I wrote this down I remember stopping and being like ??? WHY DID I JUST WRITE THAT ??? I don’t like deleting my writing so I had a serious think to myself about whether this was going to be the moment Jungkook confessed or not.
Canonly, I decided that Jungkook did in fact mean ‘us’ in a romantic sense, but because of the way you perceivably panicked at that possible meaning, he decided against taking the conversation in that direction, instead speaking about ‘us’ in a platonic sense. Poor kookie :(
“Stop. Listen to me, Jungkook, you’re a fucking great guy, okay? You’re charismatic and funny and care about your friends… sure, you almost ruined my event, but it was mostly to defend my best friend when Eunwoo got too pushy, right? You’re a good guy, meathead. I know I joke about your ego, but I really believe you’re capable of more than you think you are. Seriously, Kiri is so lucky to be the object of your affection.”
Jungkook watched the way the sun’s orange light kissed your face, a bittersweet feeling growing in his chest as he contemplated the object of his affection. Just a couple of months ago, he would have had no doubt about who held his heart, but as you held his stare, he found himself unsure and yet, entirely sure all the same.
“Jungkook? You okay?” You frowned, catching in the sadness in his eyes.
“Hm? Yeah, yeah. I just… realized something.”
“Oh? What’s that?”
“…It doesn’t matter.” He smiled, the gesture hardly reaching his eyes.
It’s in this moment that Jungkook decides that there is no way you hold the same affection towards him that he does to you. He mistakes your words of comfort as you pushing him away. You are so kind and encouraging and Jungkook loves you so much that hearing you insist about him ending back up with Kiri hurts him so bad.
But you are still unsure about your feelings and genuinely believe that's still what Jungkook wants. You’re just being a supportive friend!! :( It isn’t until the end of this chapter when Y/N has her talk with Yara that she realizes, oh man, she’s in deep.
CHAPTER EIGHT – THE MISTAKE
BLAH. This chapter is so BLAH, you know? Having to write this chapter was SO HARD. I texted irl Yara complaining about how much I hated having to put my characters through this and that I wanted to just end the story on chapter 7 and keep them happy forever. BUT ALAS! I had planned for this to happen from the start.
You tasted like the mint of your favorite brand of toothpaste. He imagined if he had caught you any later then the mint would have been accompanied by the taste of coffee, knowing the way you rarely started a day without a cup.
God, he had missed the taste of you.
What you guys didn’t see is Jungkook spending the night with Kiri, and immediately kicking her out, freaking out as the weight of guilt washed over him. He knew he had done nothing wrong, that you weren’t his real girlfriend, and that getting back together with Kiri was exactly what he had signed up for. It was what he should’ve wanted. But it wasn't… because you were what he wanted. And that was exactly what he was going to tell you as he marched over to your apartment.
But he panicked. His mind already decided that your answer to him would be no– that you didn’t feel the same. So he kissed you. He had you in the only way he was allowed to. He was selfish and impulsive and so incredibly scared that he ended up hurting the person he loved the most.
Initially though, I had Jungkook get back together with Kiri, not that he slept with her right before sleeping with Y/N. But I decided TEEHEE let me just make everything erupt into flames. However, I didn’t realize just how angry with Jungkook you guys would get. I remember thinking DAMMIT WAS THAT TOO SCANDALOUS?? I knew I was going to have to work hard for Jungkook to redeem himself to my readers.
“She wants to get back together.” Jungkook swallowed dryly, eyes wavering between yours as if to gauge your reaction.
“…Oh.”
You shook your head.
“I mean, wow! That’s… That’s great!” You smiled, something tearing apart inside you as the words left your lips.
“Y/N–”
“Seriously! This means it worked, right? This is exactly what you wanted to happen.” You enthused, turning your head so that he couldn’t see the way your eyes had welled up.
Jungkook’s heart was pounding in his ears, fighting the urge to wrap his arms around you.
“Yeah… yeah, no, you’re right. We did it.” He replied monotonously.
GOD THIS PART IS SO UNBELIEVABLY FRUSTRATING! JUST ADMIT YOU LOVE EACH OTHER YOU MORONS! This entire situation is so convoluted because there's so much information missing and not being expressed, I seriously want to ring my own neck rereading this bit.
“Are you mad?” He called out cautiously, a heavy feeling falling onto his chest.
“Why would I be mad?” You quipped back sharply, causing Jungkook to flinch. He shifted in his seat uncomfortably.
“I just thought… I mean we’ve been fooling around a lot lately, so I didn’t know if—”
“If what? I had feelings for you?” You scoffed. “Please, as if I’d ever fall for you.”
And there it was— everything Jungkook already knew but had been so afraid to hear. Of course, you didn’t feel for him what he felt for you. How could he have expected anything different?
IDIOTS!!! THEY'RE BOTH IDIOTS!!! I don't know how y'all put up with this for so long. Forgive me.
CHAPTER NINE – THE BREAK
Okay I actually love this chapter. And for many reasons. Let me break down the three scenes for you guys.
Scene one: Kiri confrontation
Kiri is definitely an opposing antagonist. She is constantly working against Y/N because of their interests directly conflicting. BUT. I would argue that the biggest antagonist to this story is the inner ones – Y/N and Jungkook's lack of ability to admit their feelings constantly holding them both back from their happy ending. That being said, a confrontation scene between Y/N and Kiri was MUCH needed. While I suppose I can understand why Kiri doesn't like Y/N, that doesn't change the fact that she has been disrespectful and catty. So miss Y/N had to put Miss Kiri in her place (•̀ᴗ•́)
Scene two: Yara and Tae at the library
Fanservice. That is all. LMFAOOO y'all reallllyyy wanted it to happen and who am I to deny my people what they want. It was really fun getting to explore my side characters and develop them through interactions outside the two main characters. IRL Yara also mentioned giving bitchin’ Yara and Tae their own chapter as a joke and I was like LOL BET. I fully was going to but then I got the idea for the next scene and was like ahh ok maybe not the whole chapter.
Scene three: Meeting with Erik
So. This was a SUPER last minute decision. Like, it wasn’t until I was writing this chapter that I planned on Erik making an appearance. I saw a tweet with someone saying their bitchin theories and they mentioned Erik appearing out of nowhere and I was like,,, HOLD ON!!!! That could be kind of spicy ≖‿≖
I knew for a fact JK was NOT going to be forgiven in this chapter; I needed a way to lay the situation out between the two dorks without trying to seem like I was trying to sway my audience in a way that didn't make sense to the story. Y/N was rightfully angry. But she wasn't only angry about the timing of the sex. She was angry that Jungkook went back to Kiri at all and there was no way she was going to admit that. So who better to lay it all out than calculated, unbiased third party Erik. He deserved some character development after all.
I also liked the idea that Y/N had, in theory, “romantic options.” Losing Jungkook didn’t mean the end of her life. Having my female lead stand on her own was very important to me.
CHAPTER TEN – THE END
RIGHT OF THE BAT I needed Jungkook to suffer. So that whole scene where he tries to interact with his old group only for his presence to make everything awkward MMMM yes, sweet revenge on my part.
You were surprised. His hair was no longer shaggy and long like you remembered it. Instead, it had been freshly cut, looking healthy and neatly styled for the first time since you met Jungkook.
THE WAY SO MANY PEOPLE COMMENTED ON THIS LINE “but Y/N liked it long?!?” IS SO FUNNNYyyyy. So let me clarify a thing. Jungkook had always wanted to cut his hair right. The only reason he didn’t was because Y/N told him not to. With Y/N no longer in the picture to convince him out of it, he cut his hair. That’s really all there is to it skfjsjf.
You know, I had written this part around the time I had just finished up the third ch believe it or not. And it was COMPLETELY different. I had it planned that Yara and Y/N ignored him throughout class and Yara had gone back after the bell rang to go verbally assault JK. And as the two hashed it out, only then was that when Jungkook would realize that he liked Y/N after Yara literally spelled it out for him.
“You like her, dumbass!” Was what I had written Yara saying. I really had written him in denial for ten chapters, I was a whole sociopath (╥﹏╥). But ultimately, I decided that Jungkook came to that conclusion on his own and the decision to apologize to Y/N would have been made over winter break.
“You said Kiri came over asking for you back, yet you still came over and slept with me the next day. Even though the two of you had sex the night before. Do you understand how that makes me feel?”
“I’m—”
“Like garbage!" You emphasized, the white paint of the door somehow irritating you further. "I felt like I was something you threw away and picked back up whenever you felt like getting your dick wet.”
Your chest was rising and falling rapidly, and you tried your hardest to not let your emotions get the best of you.
“Not to mention to everyone else, it looks like you cheated on me. Which makes me look like a fucking idiot." You scoffed.
Jungkook said nothing in reply, which somehow made it easier to say all you should have said that day in your room.
“It just sucks to realize that someone you once cared about sees you as nothing more than a toy. It fucking sucks.”
Man :( writing this hurt my heart. I really, really, love bitchin!y/n and writing her hurting freaking stinks. But she had to speak her mind. She deserves the chance to get everything off her chest with the way Jungkook hurt her.
Your heart and mind were in constant paradox, torn between wanting him back and wanting him to know just how much he had hurt you. Your mind ultimately won the battle, of course, but as Jungkook stood just a few inches of drywood apart pouring his heart out, it was hard to say which major organ was responsible for your next words.
The creak of the door being pushed open sent Jungkook's eyes wide, revealing your hesitant form. You had your arms crossed over your chest as if to guard the contents inside of it.
You looked like an angel underneath the bathroom's blue fluorescent lights, beautiful and lovely, a stark contrast from your next crushing sentence.
“I slept with Erik.”
Hehe. Ofc my girl Y/N had to have a rebound!!! She knows that life goes on. However, as I wrote in, she definitely regretted it. It was kind of the same situation that Jungkook was in where he pursued something just because it was familiar and a distraction and not because he really wanted it. Both Y/N and Jungkook are flawed characters but that’s okay! If anything, Y/N’s mistake of sleeping with Erik is what allows her to forgive Jungkook. Knowing first hand how complicated their entire relationship really was.
“I don’t need you… but I don’t think I want a life without you.” You finished shyly.
Your eyes were locked with his when suddenly a small noise escaped him, eyes pulling away from yours as his head moved to attempt to hide the way his eyes had grown wet.
I got this line from one of my best friends after her ex broke up with her. It made me physically sad and really sympathize with her so I quickly wrote it down into my notes app to save for later LMAOOOO. Knowing that you are your own person and life will inevitably go on after losing someone, but that your heart still wants and is pleading for the one person you can’t have. SO SAD. I’m happy I got to use this line in one of my fics.
The note Jungkook wrote Y/N,,, imagine him not being able to sleep one night over winter break so he just writes down everything he should have told Y/N while he still had the chance…. I’ll for real cry dude, he’s so cute. Also, the line about him buying you fluffy Halloween socks for Christmas went over people’s heads I think but HECK I THOUGHT THAT WAS SO FUNNY AND SWEET (because Y/N bought Christmas socks when it was Halloween teehee).
"Are you two dorks done crying?" Yara’s voice rang out suddenly, causing both of you to jump apart.
"Yara, you creep! Privacy, dude! Ever try knocking?" You sniffed, wiping at your face hurriedly.
"What? Like you were peeing with Jungkook in the bathroom? Please." She waved you off, walking back into the living room to give you two some privacy. She did say Jungkook had 15 minutes before she’d have to come back in after all. "Anyway, Tae will be over in 10 minutes for the Saved By The Bell marathon that’s on so you guys are more than welcomed to join." She called out from her newly seated position on the couch.
I included this scene with Yara because things were getting too serious for my liking ngl. Plus the idea that the four of them would all come together at the end for a much needed reunion made my happy bitchin heart soar.
Jungkook let out a laugh, his palm finding your cheek, eyes locked on your lips. You were preening for his kiss, mouth parting slightly as you anticipated it.
“Partners?”
The question took you by surprise, eyes widening at your not so pretend lover.
Idiot.
“Partners.” You smiled softly, eyes shiny and brimming with tears as he kissed you for what must have been the millionth time, but still somehow felt like the first.
UGH I LOVE THEM I REALLY DO. I was so happy with how this final scene came out :( They’re partners, they really are I miss these boneheads.
AND NOW, I PRESENT THE CANON FUTURE OF THE BITCHIN UNIVERSE...
10 YEARS LATER
Let’s be honest, Jungkook popped the question the day of graduation, he can’t imagine a life in which you wouldn’t be beside him
You said yes (shocker)
Cue Jungkook being the most wonderful partner and respecting your wish to finish your residency program before having the wedding
You absolutely kick ass at being a neonatal surgeon
Also, Jungkook started a film company! It’s small but he loves what he does and works with colleges and helps out the film majors with resources and equipment <3
SO IT'S THE DAY OF YOUR WEDDING RIGHT
Yara and your sisters are helping you get ready, with your best friend as the ever so reassuring maid of honor
And by that I mean you’re as calm as a cucumber and Yara is one wrong move away from having a stroke
“Y/N… Don’t freak out....The catering company put in two orders of shrimp instead of chicken and steak.”
“Yara, it’s okay.”
“NO ITS NOT???? THIS IS YOUR WEDDING DAY AND YOU’RE GETTING CRUSTACEANS.”
Y/N making Yara take a seat and practice some breathing exercises so she doesn’t upset the baby
Oh yeah, Yara is 10 weeks pregnant
Taehyung is the dad lol
Yara and Taehyung have been together ever since that day at the library hehe <3
They moved in together and adopted a cat and everything (sweet boy Tae wanted a dog but Yara’s afraid of dogs and Tae would do anything for that woman so Yeontan the cat it is)
Yara refuses to put a label on their relationship even after all this time, and Tae doesn’t ask for one. They’re happy and dedicated to each other and don’t feel the need to put pressure on something that’s already so perfect
Yara is actually violently in love with Tae but still scoffs when Y/N tries to bring it up
“Oh my god, you’re so in love with him”
“Huh??? you must be sick or something. Get well soon, damn :/”
Yara likes to come up with different labels for Taehyung every time she has to introduce him. Among her favorites are roommate, rent sharer, baby daddy and penis lender
Speaking of Taehyung, he’d have a hand on Jungkook’s shoulder as he tries to calm down the panicking groom to be
“JK, breathe.”
“What if she doesn’t show up? What if she doesn’t want to marry me? What if I pressured her into this and— and I’ve freaked her out and now she hates me?”
“Dude, you guys have been engaged for eight years. She’s had her opportunity to run. She’ll show up.”
Taehyung scruffing up the younger man’s hair reassuringly, which only flusters him more because DAMMIT he wants to look perfect for you and now his hair is messed up >:(
(You like him no matter what his hair looks like though)
Jungkook literally swallowing down a sob as you walk down the aisle and he lays his eyes on you for the first time
You having a dumb smile on your face the entire walk over because your husband to be is crying and you haven’t even exchanged vows yet
The entire audience going all sobby when you finally do exchange vows because they’re so beautiful and real
The ten years together has not been easy— from financial struggles as you tried to support yourself through med school, to personal conflicts when Jungkook wanted to start a family already
But you guys figured it out
You always do
He’s your person. And you are his.
Y/N’s sisters Rosa and Lia are a WRECK— even your dad is tearing up
Your family loves Jungkook and have been counting down the days until you guys married, let’s be honest
“You may now kiss the bride.”
Jungkook punching the air with a “FINALLY!” before kissing the hell out of you
The cutting of the cake inevitably turning into a food fight
The shrimp entrees turning out to be pretty damn good
Yara catching the bouquet and wagging her brows at Taehyung suggestively
Jungkook pulling you aside to take photos of you outside the venue because you look so so pretty and he loves the way you smile when he’s the one behind the camera
The party is in full session, your siblings tearing up the dance floor like the extroverts they are
You and Jungkook are sat at the head of the room, hands intertwined underneath the table as you watch a tired and painfully sober Yara swing her bare feet onto Taehyung’s lap, requesting a foot rub
Watching your pregnant best friend and her lover together, you turned towards your own, smile impossibly wide
“What?”
“Let’s have a baby.” You’d grin, so stupid happy
Jungkook’s eyes going round and immediately jumping up from his seat because god that’s all he’s ever wanted
Being tugged out the room by a giddy Jungkook, one of your heels flinging off somewhere behind you.
“What’s happening? Where are we going?!”
The two of you find yourself in a storage room somewhere on the hotel floor
“Jeon Jungkook, what the hell—“
His mouth find yourself, kissing you in a way that couldn’t at the altar
You kissed him back without questions, arms wrapping around the man you now called your husband
“I love you.” He’d sigh into your neck, his hot breath causing you to shiver
“I love you too.”
“Let’s make a baby.”
“Yeah let’s— wait, right here? Right now?!”
Jungkook merely nodding as his mouth found the exposed skin of your chest
“Meathead, we can’t just ditch our wedding to have sex!”
“Why not? We did our marital duties. Now it’s our guests' job to get embarrassingly drunk and make a fool of themselves on the dance floor. No one will even miss us.”
“Isn’t baby making what our honeymoon is for?”
“Screw that. I’ve done my waiting. Let’s start our family, nerd.”
Jungkook kissing your protests silent before you inevitably give in and let him take you right there and then, your wedding dress hung around your hips
Husband and wife coming together with shaky breaths and hushed moans as they promise the rest of their lives to each other, making every argument, struggle or moment of uncertainty leading up to now totally worth it
Walk of shame back into the party with nervous hair fixing from you and a proud grin from Jungkook
Yara figuring out exactly why you two had sneaked off to, flashing the newly weds a knowing smirk
The night of your wedding, Jungkook surprises you with a present
You unwrap it in confusion, only to see that it’s a glass frame and inside of it is the wrinkled and worn out lined paper the two of you had scribbled on many many years ago
Jungkook hangs up the contract right above your bed as per your request, smiling as he does and jumping on him the moment he puts down the hammer bc dammit it you’re too heckin excited to make love with your sentimental loser of a husband
And yes, by the next month, you are pregnant and incredibly happy
And of course, your daughter and Yara’s son grow up to be best friends, not a family holiday passing by where they aren’t told the story of the totally bitchin’ way both set of their parents got together
#beyond the story#bts smut#Jungkook smut#bts jungkook#bts#bts imagines#bts preferences#Jungkook x reader#jeon jungkook
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I wanna complain about how the ninja treated Zane in the first few episodes real quick. Specifically in Home. Since I have some beef with the ninja.
.
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So remember that one time Zane froze the entire monastery without effort? Yeah, that was kinda cool,
Now I begin to get angry, You’ve been warned--
And the ninja, understandably, were upset and I can get that.
But then you see how they all kinda just--- treated him really badly all the time. I get it,, he’s got weird traits and does very “Zane” things (being unfazed to be in the bathroom with somebody, legitimately not understanding comedy and laughing at odd things, at least Nya and Jay weren’t watching a horror or slasher movie, and his famous sitting-in-the-fridge scene) but like--
They really gonna do this??
Laugh at the guy for what he wears and throw around the food he made for them? Even Wu, may I add.
Can I also call attention to Jay, who throws something at Zane.
AND LOOK AT HIM--
That is not a face of comfort? By any means?? Zane shows a very little range of emotion, in the early seasons especially. But when Jay throws his own food at him, he frowns. THAT’S EMOTION,, HE’S NOT HAPPY,,, THIS ISN’T A JOKE NOR IS IT FUNNY TO HIM.
And they just--Don’t even do a double-take.
I’m bewildered at just how horribly they treat him, in this scene specifically. Not one of them, NOT EVEN WU, takes a second to think about how Zane might feel in this moment??? IN FACT, If you listen carefully, you can hear Nya and Jay belittling him.
“He looks so cute in his apron!” and “Look at his face!”
THEY ACKNOWLEDGE THEY’RE BEING CRUEL LIKE WTF THIS MAKES ME SO MAD--I HOPE THEY WENT TO BED STARVING.
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So after this god awful display of friendship that makes me want to slap all the other ninja, we get the infamous Falcon scene.
Zane has his general neutral kinda-angy-lookin’ expression. So we can’t really tell what he’s feeling in this moment, but it’s his actions that follow that say everything.
He sees the falcon and is intrigued by it and actually smiles. Which is good! That’s emotion! Well done, Zane, you’re learning!
NOW IT’S THIS BIT---IS WHERE I GET REAL JUST---HHHHHMMM It’s in this moment, I wonder if Zane knows what a toxic friendship isghghgh I jest--
Zane is smiling when he sees the falcon fly off. He likes the bird but he lets it leave.
But then---
Zane takes one brief look back to the sound of his friends and without a second doubt he BOOKS IT--
So from initially seeing this, you get the instant feeling that he would prefer to follow a mysterious bird into possible danger, than go back to his friends who are still laughing in the distance. He obviously was going to return back to them, they tease his lack of returning later in the episode WHICH I HOPE TO GET TO. But that does say enough about his actual feelings towards the rest.
Strange, possibly evil bird---or my friends who’re probably going to continue to laugh at me.
It’s a nobrainer that he’d follow the bird??
He’s not truly upset at them, I don’t even think that Zane has the capability to really be angry ngl,, but he still chose the bird over his “family” and that’s what makes me so angry at the ninja.
And to those who say “He’s not upset at the ninja, he’s just curious and the fact that he essentially ran away from them, doesn’t mean he dislikes them” I say,,, That is fair. And I will, for the sake of not looking like a dick, argue for that.
It’s clear that Zane likes to know stuff. In the beginning, he’s been the smart one. Even in this episode Kai says “We like the guy, he’s really smart..” then complains about him being weird. And later down the line he’s shown an interest in learning, being the only one in season 11 to actually read about the desert of doom and the Mechanic himself saying he’s an inquisitive nindroid in season 12.
So it’s understandable if Zane was simply sating his curiosity. But how can you tell me that the previous event was not a deciding factor in choosing the bird instead..
.
I would now like to jump forward to when the ninja are at Lloyd’s tree-house (Can I point out that the first place the falcon took zane, was a tree-house. And the last was a tree house?? Anybody? okay just me--).
And when they ask him how he found it; he tells them it’s because it danced. Jay then jokingly asks if it was a coo-coo bird, promoting everyone to--
IF YOU GUESSED “laugh at him” YOU’D BE CORRECT, HOW DID YOU GUESS???
When he does his info dump thing they don’t even bother, they just shrug in unison--which ngl I do find funny ghghgh
.
Now that’s where you’d think the Zane bullying stops right?
NOPE,, TIME TO BURN DOWN THE MONASTERY (this is a cool shot btw)
This is a good shot too, because it sets up that Zane will be a focus, and you can already assume it’s because, in some essence, this is Zane’s fault.
But then they go all out on him. They straight up tell him this was his fault, that he shouldn’t have followed the bird, he shouldn’t have been curious or try to help, that everything they had here is gone, and yell at him to his face “A teaching moment? What’s wrong with you? Don’t you get it? Everything is gone!” and it’s because of him.
In this moment they are taking out every frustration they had with him. They’re taking out every moment he’s gone into his own world and making their lives harder and that their home is gone because of him.
This is one of the very first, and very few times all the ninja have pitted against just one of their team. And it hurts. Because Zane’s reaction to this, his response to being treated horribly, having his food thrown at him like he didn’t spend likely hours making and planing it, like he doesn’t do the chores they probably wont do (taking out the rubbish earlier in the episode), is to go back to them like he wasn’t hurt by this at all.
And y’know what could’ve solved this entire thing? What could’ve prevented the exclusion and the explosion that is their friendship. Communication. On both sides, neither of them communicated with each other. The ninja didn’t openly express their feelings towards Zane TO Zane, only Wu and probably Nya. And Zane never expressed anything, ever, like--literally nothing. His moment of most emotion is in episode 7 dammit.
And I just--This is an issue that’s followed through even to the new seasons. Honest to god some of the only times I can recall him actually expressing how he feels about something, is with Pixal, and when Kai persuades him to break his morals and cheat in the slug race. God please help me find more examples because I cannot remember anything else (I’m ignoring Decoded for the time being since the last episode of that was almost entirely “Zane therapy time”)
.
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Imma end it here because my rant juices have stopped flowing and I haven’t slept in many many long hours and I really would like to collapse right about now.
So i’m not saying Zane has it worst, he probably doesn’t,, but what I’m saying is that Zane had a tough time in the beginning especially. After Kai became properly a part of the group, it was Zane that they outcasted. And because they wouldn’t actually talk to him about what they all thought. They didn’t take the time to understand him and only realized they missed him and how badly they’d been treating him when he was gone.
In the start, they were bad friends, they were horrible in fact. Zane tried, or didn’t. Where he didn’t understand people or social cues, he understood being kind and doing the right thing.
The ninja did however work from this. As of this episode, they tone down the mistreatment and make a bigger effort to get the guy. And it’s all explained and finished in episode 7.
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Overall, I really like this episode! I think the characters were great! I think the humor was great! I think the progression was great! I dunno why some o’ yall think I don’t like something because I hate it. I can hate-love something, and you’ll find there are a lot of things I hate-love in ninjago.
#this got real long real fast--#ngl this was just going to be me remembering the icy training area#but then i got distracted by how they treated him#and then it turned into a rant#probably a stupid--likely biased--rant but whatever-I haven't slept well in days i'm tired dammit#ninjago zane#ninjago#sketch rants about something#that's what i'm calling it now#can you see now why zane is my favorite? i like unpicking his character#he's fun
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It’s Good to Be Bad
I’ve described in previous analyses that I have a strong affinity for villains in fiction, including those by Disney. But like any fan of Disney, there are villains that I love and ones that I deeply detest with every bone in my body. So for my last analysis of the year, I will discuss my five most favorite and five least favorite Disney animated villains, though I also want to list a couple of other characters as honorable mentions to explain why I like or hate them.
The reasons I have for liking my favorite villains are simple, if not somewhat shallow, because I don’t exactly have deep reasons for liking them. Regardless of how evil, sadistic, cruel, and ruthless they are, I like them primarily because they are funny or charismatic. But it’s so much easier for me to list why I hate my least favorite villains, which is largely attributed the kinds of traits they display (most of which I cannot stand in people), their motives for being evil, and how they carry out their evil deeds while showing their evil natures.
This essay has turned into a longer one than I anticipated, so I am adding the “Keep reading” feature. Before I begin, I want to thank my dear buddy and soul sis @minervadeannabond for coming up with this title. Here is yet again another analysis of mine for you to enjoy, sis! 😁😄😉❤️
Most Favorites
Scar - Since The Lion King was the very first Disney film I ever saw in theaters as a child, and the first one I remember well from my childhood, many of my favorites Disney things come from it, including Scar being my #1 favorite Disney villain. Yes, he is a sadistic, tyrannical, narcissistic, cold-blooded murderer, but I think it is because of his cunning, smooth, elegant, charismatic nature and how pivotal he is to the story, particularly with how much he turns out to be a dark reflection of Simba, is why I love him so much. Furthermore, his song “Be Prepared” is my favorite villain song and among my favorite Disney songs of all, further showing how much The Lion King has given me Disney favorites since I was a child. 😁
Hades - Another one I remember well from my childhood, Hades is undoubtedly one of the funniest villains from the Disney animated canon. Although he is as cruel, evil, ruthless, and sadistic as any Disney villain, Hades is also so fast-talking, sleazy, sarcastic, cheeky, and hilarious that it makes it hard for me to take him seriously as a menacing villain. And while he constantly goes into fiery rages and blows his hot-headed top when furious, these help make Hades far more a comical, rather than scary, figure. Heck, when I was a kid, I always laughed, rather than got scared, whenever he unleashed one of his temper tantrums (except when he blows up at Meg with “I OWN YOU!!!”). And James Woods’s performance, especially since he ad-libbed many lines, helps make Hades such an unforgettable and memorable, if not lovable, character. So yeah, Hades’s wisecracking, talkative personality made him a memorable villain for me as a child, and I’ve loved him for it ever since. 😆😂
Ursula - Much like Hades, Ursula is sleazy, scheming, and cunning, yet wisecracking and comical at the same time. Besides her dry sense of humor, Ursula’s eccentricity, flamboyance, and elegance have always been the traits that drew me to her, and Pat Carrolll’s performance of the character is pure excellence. 😉
Maleficent - Despite being an incarnation of pure evil, including with her self-proclaimed title as The Mistress of All Evil, to me, Maleficent is by far the coolest, most badass Disney animated villain of all! 😆👍🏻 Yes, she curses Aurora with no true motive whatsoever, and she’s sadistic, ruthless, blasphemous, and murderous, but her display of her ill temper and dark magic just makes her totally awesome, most especially when she zaps her minions for their stupidity and incompetence upon learning they were only looking for a baby during their 16-year search for Aurora. 😁
Ratigan - Again, Disney has an evil, murderous, sadistic villain in Ratigan, but I love him because he is very collected, calculating, sophisticated, and charismatic, not to mention Vincent Price delivers such a great vocal performance as the character. 😉 What I also love about Ratigan is the moment when he undergoes what is known as a villainous breakdown, which is when a villain snaps and goes utterly crazy. During the film, Ratigan has some moments of losing his cool, but just as quickly manages to become calm and regain his composure. However, upon seeing Basil and Olivia escape from him inside Big Ben, along with Basil having having foiled his earlier scheme to kill the queen and take over England, Ratigan finally snaps, turning from a formal, sophisticated, composed rat to a highly feral, aggressive, savage one. It is the moment when Ratigan reveals the monster within and looks like a true rat, with an aggressive expression, hunched back, elongated claws, and running on all fours. The fact that Ratigan’s breakdown juxtaposes what kind of rat he was for the majority of the film is why his villainous breakdown is my favorite of any Disney villain.
Most Hated
Gaston - I have stated this before in “Bride and Prejudice”, but I pick Gaston as my #1 choice as my least favorite Disney animated villain. And it’s not just because of his extreme vanity, egotism, chauvinism, and arrogance, which are the very traits I hate in people, but because of his inferior, sexist, misogynistic views of women. Gaston is THE walking definition of toxic masculinity, the fictional example of the worst kind of man, the epitome of what men should NEVER be! 😡😡😡 He thinks men are the superior gender and that women are inferior to men, with their only purposes being to serve men and be their sex objects. And since I am a feminist who believes in gender equality, I dislike men who have low, sexist opinions of women, and Gaston fits the profile of what I think is the worst example of such a man. I could go on and on explaining just why I loathe this monster of a man with all my heart, but you can just read the aforementioned analysis to find out more.
Lady Tremaine - If it weren’t for Gaston being my #1 pick because of his extreme sexism and misogyny, I would pick Lady Tremaine. She comes such a close second because her motivations for abusing, oppressing, and being so cruel to Cinderella are petty and stupid, ESPECIALLY because Cinderella never even did anything to deserve such treatment from her in the first place! 😠😡 Lady Tremaine hates Cinderella and is very jealous of her purely because Cinderella so much better-looking and kinder than her own daughters and herself. So they abuse her and make her their servant to make her miserable and unattractive so that they can look better than her instead. Additionally, Lady Tremaine has a deep-rooted obsession to be above Cinderella at all costs that she resorts to lying, manipulation, trickery, and cheating in order to stay above. I particularly loathe it when she manipulates her daughters into tearing up Cinderella’s dress just so that she can appear fair and keep her word regarding her side of the bargain (she says ”if you can find something suitable to wear”, and once it’s wrecked, it’s no longer suitable) while simultaneously making sure she doesn’t have to keep her promise since she never wants Cinderella to go in the first place. All that being said, do these sound like justifiable excuses for hating a completely innocent woman? I DON’T THINK SO!!! 😡😡😡
Claude Frollo - Now if weren’t for BOTH Gaston and Lady Tremaine coming first, Claude Frollo would come on top as well! 😡😡😡 Frollo is without a doubt in my mind the most evil villain in the Disney animated canon. Unlike most Disney villains, he is COMPLETELY devoid of any likable or redeemable traits, making me have nothing but feelings of pure hatred for him. Ruthless, cruel, blasphemous, racist, and evil to his core, Frollo holds a deep-seated hatred for the gypsies and seeks to eradicate them from Paris, making him not only murderous, but genocidal, especially since he seeks to kill them simply out of his own racism, supremacy, and superiority. Throughout the years in his quest to eliminate the gypsies, Frollo murders Quasimodo’s mother by violently kicking her, causing her to fall and hit her head on the stone steps of Notre Dame, then tries to burn Esmeralda at the stake, declaring that she must be killed because she has been practicing witchcraft. After killing the mother, Frollo even attempts to drown baby Quasimodo simply because of his deformity. What makes Frollo even more evil besides doing his deeds is that he is a judge with control over the city, yet he proves himself to be corrupt and hypocritical by violating the laws to accomplish his dark, sinister deeds. Perhaps what makes Frollo the most evil villain of all is that he is in complete denial about how evil he really is. He has a delusional belief that he is a good, religious man doing God’s work by trying to purge the world of evil, when all he really does is twist his “faith” and hypocritically use it for his own evil purposes. What’s worse is that Frollo never once takes an ounce of responsibility for his crimes; he makes excuses to justify his actions, painting himself as guiltless and his victims as the only ones at fault. So with Frollo being such a blasphemous, hypocritical, racist, genocidal, murderous, corrupt judge who never believes he is doing anything wrong and always lays blame on the victims of his misdeeds, I can’t say there is a single thing about him that I like, and I’m happy he met his death in a fiery blaze! 😡🔥
Mother Gothel - A character I see as being an amalgam of Gaston, Lady Tremaine, and Frollo, the reasons why I hate all three of these villains are also found in Gothel: vanity, narcissism, oppression, mental abuse, trickery, manipulation, dishonesty, hypocrisy, and flat-out cruelty. First of all, Gothel’s vanity, narcissism, and obsession with her own beauty makes her extremely insufferable and annoying, not to mention the fact that she hoarded the flower to herself for hundreds of years just to stay alive shows how incredibly selfish and possessive she is. And due to her selfishness, she kidnaps Rapunzel, hides her in a tower, lies to her about the outside world, and continually mentally abuses, manipulates, oppresses, mocks, and belittles her just to ensure that Rapunzel will never leave the tower and the flower’s magic in her hair will keep her (Gothel) alive and young forever. On par with her narcissism, Gothel is shown to be a very spoiled, childish, immature woman who seeks to always have things her way and throws tantrums or other emotional outbursts when she doesn’t get her way or what she wants, especially the very moment she wants it. Furthermore, Gothel possesses a martyr, or victim, complex, which is shown perfectly when victimizes herself and places all the blame on Rapunzel whenever any sort of conflict befalls their lives and relationship, especially when they argue. So with all these flaws in mind, like Gaston, Lady Tremaine, and Frollo, I can’t find any good reason to like Gothel at all. “Mother Knows Best”? More like “Gothel Knows Worst”! 😠😡
Governor Ratcliffe - I said above that I hate Gaston because of his bigoted, low views of women, and prejudice is the main reason why I hate Governor Ratcliffe. However, his prejudice is in the form of racism, the kind of bigotry that I hate the most. Ratcliffe displays this attitude towards the Native Americans, considering them savages and seeing himself as better than them all because of his race, which makes him a white supremacist. Besides his supremacy and superiority regarding his race, Ratcliffe is intensely greedy and selfish since he wants to keep any riches found for himself and believes that the Virginia land and anything he finds on it is his for the taking. In relation to his bigotry, he is also quite delusional and self-righteous, which makes him believe that any theory he has is right and he refuses to believe otherwise or listen to reason. For example, Ratcliffe dismisses Wiggins’ correct assumptions on why the Indians attacked the settlers and John’s claim that there is no gold in the lands after Pocahontas tells him this. The hatred I hold for Ratcliffe is significantly less than the other four listed here, but the reasons I gave are virtually like those I gave for Frollo, so I’m confident with Ratcliffe and his place on my list.
Bonus Mentions
Hans - Hans is a villain that I place in the middle between my most loved and most hated villains, because I love him for WHAT he is as a villain while I simultaneously hate him for WHO he is as a character. I have said it to friends and some of my other analyses before, but one of the reasons why I love Frozen is because it took many of the traditional fairy tale elements and tropes used in their preceding films, and turned them upside down. So rather than having another prince as the heroic male lead in this film, Frozen twisted that trope around by making him the villain instead. And when Hans finally reveals his true nature, you realize that he has fooled not only Anna and the other characters who interacted with him, but first-time viewers as well! So while I love Hans for being a villain who keeps his true nature under wraps for the majority of the film and almost gets away with his crimes because of it, I also hate him because of how cold, cruel, callous, ruthless, and sadistic he really is. When he reveals his true nature and explains his plan to Anna, he mocks her intelligence, naïveté, and desperation for love while explaining just how easy it was for him to deceive and manipulate her into being a pawn in his plan to take over Arendelle. Throughout the whole scene, Hans smiles wickedly and sadistically, clearly showing the delight he is getting from tormenting Anna and watching her suffer while he explains his scheme and extinguishes all light sources to accelerate her death. It’s also easy to see his sadism when he announces his plan to murder Elsa, and that he will get even greater joy out of carrying out the act itself (which we see when Hans smiles widely while swinging his sword over Elsa’s head as he tries to kill her on the fjord).
Chi-Fu - While he is not a true villain, and not even evil at all, Chi-Fu is a very detestable character, one whose guts I hate completely because he has the same traits that make me hate Gaston: arrogance, conceit, egotism, bigotry, superiority, and misogyny. Prejudice against women is a main theme in Mulan, and Chi-Fu is the one man whose prejudiced opinions never change. While Shang and Mulan’s fellow soldiers initially hold views that women are beneath men, they learn to change them after Mulan proves herself a capable warrior in the army (even after her disguise is revealed), most especially when she helps save China from Shan Yu’s reign of terror. Despite the majority of his bigotry being aimed at women, Chi-Fu is also detestable because he shows it towards nearly everyone else, except the Emperor. As the second-in-command to the Emperor, Chi-Fu sees himself superior to almost everyone else around him, which enhances his pompous, elitist, arrogant attitude. Because of all these antagonistic traits, I loathe Chi-Fu while I don’t hate Shan Yu at all, even though the latter is truly pure evil and genocidal! 😠😡 It just goes to show that some people who are neither necessarily good nor bad can be even more contemptible that the most malevolent, murderous people.
#Miscellaneous Disney#Disney#Disney Villains#Disney Villain#villains#villain#Scar#Hades#Ursula#Ratigan#Maleficent#Gaston#Lady Tremaine#Claude Frollo#Mother Gothel#Governor Ratcliffe#Hans#Chi-Fu#favorites#most favorites#least favorites#my stuff#mine
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