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sc0tters · 29 days

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Distance Apart | Nico Hischier

summary: sometimes all you need is your boyfriend, even if that means he has to put his family above his team.

request: yes/no

warnings: swearing, like one mention of blood.

word count: 2.78K

authors note: we are back with the Rosie universe! I miss writing for dad Nico and when I asked you guys said you wanted it in this universe so here it is! we have a bit of angst in it but I like how it got to in the end.

pt 1

You were tired.

Rosie had decided that she wanted nothing to do with you after you started showing. You were now seven months pregnant with your baby boy and Rosie was hating it. The poor season that the devils were having, left Rosie and you walking on eggshells around Nico who was constantly stressed out. What made it all that much worse was the fact that Nico hadn’t seen you in weeks and now he was on a road trip with the team.

Nico tried everything to convince you to come with him on the trip but as you couldn’t sleep through the night as your back was killing you. To make matters even worse, Rosie was now feeling your nightly pain as she was having nightmares every night. You were running on mere minutes of sleep which was only going to grow less as Rosie started running a fever.

Yet, still that wasn’t your biggest problem. You were in his cabin in Bern with Rosie as you prepped for the arrival of your new addition. It had been a month since you saw Nico as he came to see you, not hesitating to come during the all star break. But now you were counting down the days until you were no longer a single parent “I know Rosie.” You sighed getting up to hear the sounds of her sobs echoed in the baby monitor.

Her new favorite thing to do was cry for her father “papa!” Rosie wailed as her lights turned on looking for her father’s face “you know he is home my love.” You ran your hands through your greasy hair that you couldn’t remember when you last got the chance to wash it as it seemed that you had been rocking the messy bun for days.

She continued to cry as her red cheeks meant she wasn’t getting any better “let’s go sit outside.” You offered hoping that her play mat would be enough to calm her down whilst she sucked on one of her old frozen teething toys. The 15 month old clung to your shirt hanging to the faint scent of her father that the shirt still had. You attacked what remained of his closet as nothing from your own seemed to fit anymore “I know I miss him too.” You nodded as you sat her on her mat seeing the picture of her and Nico that sat on the table ahead of you both.

It seemed that the world was on your side as your phone began to ring, causing your gaze to snap from the picture “I will be right back. You announced getting up to grab your phone from the kitchen where you’d get her a teether, hoping it would act like a popsicle. Your phone screen was lit up by Nico’s contact just like he promised to call when he got to Las Vegas. You took less than a second to grip your phone to answer the call “hey schatzi!” Nico shut his door smiling as he got to see your face again.

You wanted to tell Nico all about the day you had but instead when Rosie let out a cheer you were reminded of who really needed to see him “Rosie I have your dad!” You announced coming back into the living room with both your phone and the frozen toy.

Nico was full of concern seeing how you never even took the chance to speak to him “hi maus.” He cooed sending her a wave as she sucked on the ice piece “papa!” She sent him a toothy smile whilst you held the phone. All the medicine that Rosie needed was her father’s attention. The duo continued this conversation which was primarily just Nico talking to his daughter ass she nodded along like she understood what he said.

You began to take the moment to shut your eyes falling asleep with your head on the couch as you yawned “maus why don’t you let me talk to your momma?” Nico’s voice combined with Rosie tugging on your shirt it made you look up “hi Nico.” You forced a smile onto your lips.

Being with him for years though Nico knew that you were hiding something “think we should talk about Glasgow.” The Scottish city was in fact where you guys learnt that you were pregnant with Rosie. It was a reminder of the joyous memory, that you now both now used as a code word. Rosie was beginning to want to listen to every single conversation that you guys had, and now used it when you needed to talk about something in private.

He watched you sit there as you tried to ignore his gaze “schatzi please.” He pleaded as he grew worried for what was going on with you in that moment “play with your toys and I’ll be right back.” You kissed Rosies head as she now seemed content with her practical popsicle.

You made the short walk back to the kitchen wanting to keep Rosie in your sights “how are you?” Nico wanted to drop the team and all of his responsibilities to be with you, as guilt consumed him that he wasn’t with you “and don’t lie to me because I will get my mother to move in there if you do.” The offer was something you then responded with being met with a break up. You did love his parents, but you weren’t going to lose your independence.

Now though you were a fraction of that strong woman “I miss my sleep.” You began gripping your hand on your stomach as you let out a grunt “schatzi what is it?” Nico was ready to get out soon the next flight to see you.

You raised your hand to wave off his concern “Rosie can’t sleep and my body is killing me.” Your boobs throbbed under your touch as you groaned “you missing our favorite cure for that?” The captain teased, only to quickly realize that you weren’t in the right mood to hear him joke around.

It was the glare that made him go quiet, opting to regret his sex offer. When you were close to having Rosie you only wanted to climb him like a tree and Nico wasn’t going to stop you as it made you feel comfortable. You groaned again as you were too tired to stay mad at him “I just need this baby out.” Your confession had two meanings, you were done with being pregnant and on top of that you needed your boyfriend back.

Rosie’s rattle echoed as she hit it on the floor “let me talk to my coach.” He could see how drained you looked with the stains on your (his) shirt “absolutely not.” You shook your head refusing to be the reason why he would leave his team “we can survive for the next month without you.” It was clear you were lying and it took Nico everything to keep his mouth shut as he sent you a look of concern.

He wanted to argue but knew that you’d just hang up “there is no harm in wanting a bit of help y/n.” He felt horrible that he couldn’t be there for you, but with your boy coming at the end of the season you both agreed it was best for you to be in Bern. His words made your gaze sharpen “I’m fine.” You snapped making him run his fingers through his hair as he let out a sigh.

The captain hated it when you got all closed up and refused to let him help “just let me in.” Nico pleaded as he watched you shake your head “it is hard to do that when you aren’t here!” You grumbled reminding him of the fact that you were practically alone. Your tone made Rosie cry, causing your head to snap in her direction.

Your fingers rubbed your temples as you groaned “look I need to go get that.” It was the last thing either of you needed as you hung up letting Nico see his reflection in the screen “fuck!” He groaned throwing his phone across his room in frustration.

This time you were lucky that all Rosie wanted was company “papa!” She cried gripping her hands out to hold you “I know honey.” You sighed pulling her into your arms as you began to rock her trying to soothe your upset toddler “I miss him too.” Yelling at him was the first time you felt like you had any kind of control over something in days and now here you were feeling like an ass.

On the other side of the world after sleeping on it Nico was shoving his things back into his suitcase “what are you doing?” Timo furrowed his eyebrows as he walked in to see a disheveled Nico rummaging around his room “I need m-my passport and I can’t.” Nico sat on his bed not knowing much of what to do.

He was grateful that you made him bring it all of his roadies now in case you gave birth when he was gone “but can you breathe for me?” Timo crouched in front of his captain wondering what could have pushed him to this as Nico nodded “then I’m pretty sure you need this if you want to meet your baby boy.” The blonde fiddled with the passport in his hand as he waved it in front of his teammate.

Nico felt his eyes go wide seeing the book he tried so hard to find “it was on the table when I walked in.” Timo explained as he watched the captain get up “my girls need me.” Nico reminded himself of the reason why he was leaving this team “go get ‘em then.” Timo sent the boy a salute as he watched him run out of his room.

After an argument you and Nico usually didn’t talk until you both calmed down, but now you were sat staring at your phone as you reread the headline Nico Hischier will be taking a leave of absence for personal reasons. Nina sensed your worry as she handed you a cup of tea “I’m sure he is coming here because he wants to check on you both.” You called his sister in tears when you realized you had gone too far in getting mad at him.

You nodded hoping she was right “but what if he just goes back to his apartment instead?” You asked watching Rosie smile at Nina “and it seems like I am the only person she cries around.” You mumbled pushing your head into the pillow behind you.

Nina pulled her niece onto her lap “Nico is in love with you and Rosie loves you too.” She reminded you as she placed her hand on your knee “you are a great mom and don’t forget it.” As you stared at the garden in front of you Nina knew you had every worst case scenario run through your mind as you were a mess. The calmest girl she had ever met was now focused on everything that wasn’t her.

You forced a smile onto your lips as you tried to act receptive to the compliment “look I have to get to work but don’t forget you call if you need anything.” Nina kissed Rosie’s head as she didn’t want to leave you two alone “I will.’ You nodded watching her leave.

After she left you couldn’t shake the fact that you were failing, as a partner, a mother, and even a pregnant woman. So as Rosie went down for a nap you opted for a shower, forcing yourself out of your clothes as you went to shower. As the warm water hit your skin you forgot how great it felt to let the lavender scent of your shower gel invade your nostrils. But not even that soothing scent could calm you down from the pain you felt in your stomach “ahhh.” You moaned running your hand under your belly as something felt off, the water turned a shade of crimson red only making you panic.

Each moment faded into the next as you got out of the shower and grabbed whatever clothing you could find rushing to the door as you picked up Rosie and your delivery bag from the front door. Tears clouded your eyes as you drove yourself to the hospital feeling as alone as ever.

Nico was surprised to see Nina stood at the airport waiting for him, but when he saw the fear in her eyes he knew something was wrong “the baby is coming.” His mom had come to the hospital after she was called with Rosie needing supervision “no we still have over a month.” Nico felt his mouth go dry as he shook his head

Nina nodded as she shrugged “I know but he is coming and has been for two hours now so hurry up.” She clasped her hands together taking his duffle as the siblings pushed out of the airport running to get to you.

The hospital room was quiet as you felt numb, by the time you had woken up again you were no longer pregnant and couldn’t even hold him as he was in ICU “schatzi.” Nico gasped seeing you look up at him “I’m so sorry.” You apologized feeling your eyes fill with tears as you shook your head thinking about how the last thing you did was yell at him.

Nico couldn’t let you continue as he wrapped his arms around you “no baby don’t say that.” He kissed your head as his thumb wiped away your tears from your cheek “I didn’t even get to see him.” All you got was a nurses description of your baby.

It killed him hearing the pain in your voice “been told he is okay and strong.” Nico squeezed your shoulders as he watched you nod trying to calm down “really?” It made you feel like you really did get to see him.

He moved to sit in front of you taking up the side of your bed as he nodded “I really am sorry for everything I said though.” You reached out for his hand honestly glad to see that he really was there “can we agree to never fight over the phone again.”He announced making you quickly nod “it’s far more enjoyable making you sleep on the couch when I see it happen.” Your joke made him suck at his teeth only causing your grin to grow wider.

There was a moment where the two of you were able to just enjoy each others company “I really have missed you.” You mumbled watching him move closer to you “then it is a good thing I have the next three weeks off.” Nico kissed your lips as you furrowed your eyebrow.

As you cocked your head you wanted to point out that he only had two weeks nobody needs to know that you are no longer pregnant.” He shrugged resting his forehead against yours “I love you so much.” You mumbled kissing his lips once more.

Hours had passed and you had taken a nap and were now clear and ready to see your boy “you better not crash me Hischier.” You warned placing your feet on your footrests “would be a funny way to end this date.” He teased making you giggle before you winced “don’t make me laugh you ass.” You groaned gripping at your stomach trying to avoid the stitches from the c-section wound.

He squeezed your shoulder as an apology “you ready to see our boy?” There was a hopefulness in his voice as he looked to the room number in the NICU “you know it.” You nodded failing to hide the grin on your face as he pushed you into the room.

You let out a gasp seeing him laying in his crib “he’s so sweet.” You pressed your hand against your chest as you cooed “c’mon mama let’s see him.” Nico held his hand out to yours.

The captain helped you up looking around to make sure you guys weren’t caught by any nurses “he is perfect.” You felt your voice break as you smiled “little Elias is all ours too.” Nico watched how your eyes couldn’t leave him.

It was the happiest he had seen you in weeks “so how long until you’re clear for our favorite activity?” Nico smirked as he ran his fingers along your back “I just got the last one out, you are celibate for the foreseeable.” You warned sending him a glare as he laughed kissing your temple.

“There’s my girl.”

#nico hischier x reader #nico hischier imagine #hockey imagines #imagines #oneshots #hockey imagine #nhl oneshot #nhl imagine #amber writes fics #ambers love moments

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huggybearluvr · 6 months

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Star Crossed Lovers

Series Masterlist

pairing: Luke Hughes x kelce!reader

summary: A love story in which the little sister of Travis and Jason Kelce NFL stars, falls for Luke Hughes Michigan hockey star.

General Masterlist

Hockey > Football Kansas City Road Trip Kansas City Confessions Crazy Communitcation

Sneaky Secrets

Unpublished

The Duo

Holiday Bliss

Holiday Bliss Pt. 2

Holiday Bliss Pt. 3

Pick of the Patch

Birthday Girl

Draft

My favorite boy <3

I miss you

Oh dear

Surprise! I love you.

#luke hughes #luke hughes x reader #luke hughes imagine #luke hughes blurb #luke hughes fic #luke hughes smut #luke hughes series

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hollytoshaw · 22 days

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hiiii! i love your work and i just wanted to request a harry insta au but reader is american, all kinda inspired by “so american” by olivia rodrigo. thank you sm!💐💘

omg hi lovely!!! thank u so much @themirrorballgal !!!! i loveee this song sm so thank u for this idea. hope you enjoy!!! feel like this is a bit shit but i tried lol i'm v british so hope this isn't awfullll & sorry its a bit short!!!! xxx

so american | harry lewis

summary: y/n & harry being an iconic american x guersney duo

face claim: ig : gracie.mckenna_

'Drivin' on the right-side road, he says I'm pretty wearin' his clothes'

y/nusername posted a photo!

liked by ksi & 490,039 others! y/nusername driving around my favorite place with my favorite boy! tagged wroetoshaw location : brooklyn, new york city

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freyanightingale miss you!!!!

taliamar cuties

faithlouiseak come back to the uk soon <333

wroetoshaw driving on the left>>>

wroetoshaw nyc harder to drive in than london ffs ↳y/nusername stop your whinning u love it

harryxlewisfan stop it harry in nyc !!!!!

w2slover love this duo

ynharryfan mother and father

harryfan1 harry hating america but loving it since y/n>>>

ynharryfan2 pls do a nyc vlog w harry 😭😭😭

y/nusername posted a photo!

liked by wroetoshaw & 380,026 others! y/nusername first trip to guernsey!!!! tagged wroetoshaw location : alderney, guernsey

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r0sielewis love you girl!!!

taliamar adorable

faithlouiseak omgggg <333

wroetoshaw pretty girl ↳y/nusername ❤️❤️

harryxlewisfan omg mom and dad in guernsey

w2slover Y/N WEARING OG MERCH

ynharryfan harry calling her pretty in the comments i can't

harryfan1 omg she's met his family i can't

ynharryfan2 my usa queen finally made it to the channel islands

'And he's got hands that make hell seem cold, feet on the dashboard, he's like a poem I wish I wrote, I wish I wrote'

y/n_username posted a photo!

liked by wroetoshaw & 380,026 others! y/nusername london archives tagged wroetoshaw location : london, england

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wroetoshaw you know what they say about big hands ↳y/nusername big gloves?

harryxlewisfan HAND SIZE DIFFERENCE

w2slover OMGGGGGGGG

ynharryfan i can't w these twooo

harryfan1 queen is in london towwwwwn

'When he laughs at all my jokes, And he says I'm so American'

y/nusername posted a photo!

liked by wroetoshaw & 310,029 others! y/nusername alexa play 'all american bitch' by olivia rodrigo location new york, new york city

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freyanightingale come back soon!!!!

taliamar love ur face

faithlouiseak aaahh miss u b

wroetoshaw biggest american bitch ever ↳y/nusername okay guernsey bitch boy

wroetoshaw joke miss you my pfb ↳y/nusername wtf is pfb ↳wroetoshaw my proper fit bird x ↳y/nusername uk slang will be the death of me

harryxlewisfan their interactions>>>>

w2slover nowonder harry's been moody in sidemen vids recently, our queen is back in her homeland 😭😭😭

ynharryfan harry better get in his private jet and fly his ass over to nyc now

harryfan1 how has harry bagged himself y/n

wroetoshaw posted a photo!

liked by callux and 810,560 others wroetoshaw little miss america tagged y/nusername

zerkaa she's turned you soft

y/nusername love u my guernsey boy💙💙💙

miniminter cringe

sidemanxfan HARRY POSTING???

harryxlewisfan my faves

w2slover little miss queen of america more like

ynharryfan not a day goes by where i'm not jel of what these two have omg

sidemenfan2 logan x ksi got nothing on this duo

a/n: hope this is okay. thanks for all the love on my other works you're all fab and i love making these, i know i said i'd stop the social media au's for a while but they're so fun to make and don't take that long so i'm obsessed lol

#w2s #wroetoshaw #w2s x reader #harry wroetoshaw #harry lewis #harry w2s #sidemen #w2s fic #w2s imagine #wroetoshaw imagine #wroetoshaw oneshot #hollytoshaw #chris md #arthurtv #sidemen x reader #requests

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isawritesshit · 7 months

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Lavender Detangler

image was taken from @ hankaashi on pinterest

Synopsis: You are Nishinoya's older sister, the fearless, confident, and reliable manager... except when faced with your feelings with the team ace. As both of your high school years are going to be coming to a close, will one of you be able to say something about how you feel? Who will overcome their nerves first?

Warnings: reader has she/her pronouns, reader is described as being short because she's nishinoya's sister, language, karasuno being chaotic, season 4 spoilers, tooth-rotting fluff.

Author's Note: My old Asahi fic, as promised. This one is a bit longer and used to be on my old wattpad account some time ago. Asahi is one of my favorite hq characters, literally my baby. This one is pure fluff, and is a bit on the longer side. Also, this fic takes place during the events of season 4 so there are some spoilers in that sense, but nothing too major. Enjoy lovelies <3

Word Count: ~ 6.9k

___________________________________________________________

They did it. In your two years of being a manager for the Karasuno boys volleyball team, you probably would have never thought that the boys would beat Shiratorizawa, much less make it to nationals. And yet, even as you stared out at the Tokyo sky on the way to the inn, even as Asahi landed that last spike to push them through to the 2nd round, you still felt that little voice whisper in your head in complete awe and disbelief.

They did it.

After the game, the Karasuno gang packed up and headed back for the inn. Most of them took a nap or stared tiredly out the window. They were all exhausted from the thrill of their first game, and they should be. They fought hard and restlessly. The boys showed everyone watching in the stands today that they didn’t come here on some fluke, they came here because they are going to win.

That’s right. The entire damn tournament.

Takeda shouted from the front, breaking you from your thoughts. “We’re here everyone!” Hinata immediately jumped up from his seat and barreled full speed toward the front. Kageyama chased after him not much longer (probably because Hinata woke him up when he started running). You chuckled at the duo and slowly got up from your own seat in the front. As everyone else piled off you began making your way toward the back. You kind of made it your own job to wake anyone up once you’ve reached the destination on road trips.

You spotted Tanaka and Yuu dozing a few seats back. You silently made your way over to them, and started to shake Tanaka.

“Tanakaaaa, wake uuuup,” you sang while shaking his shoulder. He lazily opened his eyes and let out a yawn. You then reached over to poke at Yuu’s back which was turned to you as he wrapped himself around his duffel bag. “Come on Yuu.” You didn’t have to try that hard with Yuu. After all, you woke him up for school every day.

As you leaned back, Tanaka stretched his arms above his head and asked, “(Y/N)? Are we here?” You gave him a nod and moved out of the way for him to get up. Yuu was glaring at you from behind his seat.

“What’s wrong Yuu?” you asked, smirking. “Mad cause I woke you up?”

“I was having a good dreaaammm,” he whines.

“Whatever, just get your lazy ass up and let's head inside,” Tanaka drawls as he slaps Yuu upside the head.

“My lazy ass?” Yuu retorts. Yuu grabbed his duffel bag, and then returned a smack upside Tanaka’s head as they walked toward the front of the bus. “You were sleeping too!” Here they go again…

“Boys!” you yelled at them. They stopped. “Just get off the bus!” The libero and the wing spiker left without saying another word.

You sighed while shaking your head. You considered this your own role as a manager sometimes. Kiyoko was more of the quiet one that did her job well, Yachi was the newbie still getting used to the reins, and you were the one that kept the boy’s attitudes in check (yes, even Daichi sometimes).

You still remember back when you were about halfway through your first year as a manager. You were a second-year at the time. There was a day when the boys were so rowdy that not even the old Coach Ukai could calm them down. You must had been on your period or something that day, because you got so mad at them. All of a sudden, you had started scolding them for their attitudes and lack of respect, telling them that they needed to represent Karasuno High School the right way. It scared the team a bit. Their tiny manager that was practically a foot shorter than them was putting them in line and they actually listened. And so, the role kinda stuck (though you try not to lash out like you did that day).

You smiled at the memory. You started your way towards the front until you heard a few light snores coming from a seat further back to your right. Huh, guess I missed one. You walked back to the seat, almost yelping in surprise at who you saw.

Asahi? The ace slept with his own duffel bag propped up against the window as he snuggled it like a pillow. Half his face was buried into the bag while the other half was still in a peaceful slumber. Little bits of his brown hair fell around his forehead and over his ears from his bun. One longer strand of hair fell out over his nose, and would lift up slightly whenever he let out a small snore. You wondered how he didn’t wake up from Yuu and Tanaka yelling as they got off. Daichi and Suga did say that Asahi sleeps like the dead, but you’ve never got to actually see that for yourself.

You felt heat crawl up your face and ears at the sight of him. Asahi’s face was usually always concentrated, scared, or smiling. But this was somehow different. Seeing him sleeping like that made you stop dead in your tracks and stop thinking rationally. What’s worse? He’s not even trying. Asahi’s expression, mixed with his messy hair and snores, was pulling you in like a magnet. You thought it was downright adorable.You wanted to sit by him, maybe get a little closer. Close enough that perhaps you could smell the scent off his jacket or…

Your blushing got worse. You liked to keep these thoughts under wraps, but when they did come up you couldn’t help but get flustered. Fortunately, sitting next to him was as far as you got.

Hesitantly, you reached over to grab and shake Asahi’s shoulder. “Asahi,” you whispered. He didn’t budge. God, you were so lucky that no one could see you doing this. Under normal circumstances, with everyone in here, you would have been redder than a Nekoma jersey. “Asahi,” you whispered a little louder this time, shaking his shoulder a bit more. When he stirred and sucked in a breath, you flinched and stood up so quickly that you thought your spine snapped. But sadly, it didn’t, and now here you are, watching as Asahi opened his eyes ever so slowly.

When he sits up and his eyes finally land on you, you glued your eyes to the seat you were just sitting on. “O-Oh, (y/n)! Are we here?” Asahi asks in a groggy voice while looking up at you and then out the window to see the inn.

“Y-yeah!” you answered, cursing your voice for going a little more high pitched than you planned. You forced yourself to look up at him and conceal your blush. “I woke you up…” Just as he rose, you started to walk to the front with Asahi now not that far behind you. You swore, even just feeling him walking behind you was setting off butterfly cannons in your stomach. So, you composed yourself and tried to just walk straight.

But, what if you stopped? What if you leaned back, felt the warmth of his broad chest against your head… who are you kidding, both you and him would have a heart attack if you ever tried something so bold. You couldn’t seem to place how these thoughts entered your head about someone so fragile like that...

Both of you got off the bus and walked side by side now toward the lobby. You were mentally smacking yourself for thinking such things with him so close by.

When you entered the lobby, you took a seat and forced yourself to stop and think about something else.

“I’m going to put my stuff upstairs, see ya (y/n)!” Asahi called to you, turning for the stairs. Man, you were so caught up in your own thoughts that you didn’t even talk to him! Just how awkward can you get-

“See ya for dinner!” you called from over his shoulder as he, much to your relief and dismay, disappeared upstairs.

You let out a small sigh as you watched him disappear. Of course, you’ve fallen for the Ace of Karasuno. You just couldn’t help it. Asahi is one of the greatest friends you have and probably the most caring and understanding person you’ve ever met. He interested you too, how someone that big and imposing could be so gentle. Not only that, you did think he was really attractive. You started feeling this way at the beginning of your second year, and it didn’t take long for everyone to catch on. Heck, even the current first years have noticed it (Tsukishima teases you about it so much you have to remind him to respect his fucking elders and their problems). Somehow Asahi hasn’t caught on, probably due to his usual softie mentality.

That’s probably for the best. Not wanting to screw up your friendship with Asahi is probably the reason you’ve never confessed anyway. Probably.

But you’re running out of time. After this tournament, you have a few more weeks before you both graduate and you go off to attend university. So maybe you’ll just enjoy the time that you have with him, even if you most likely won’t tell him in the end.

___________________________________________________________

Asahi walked up to the boys room with his duffel bag, his mind a flurry of thoughts. Should I have stayed back with her? No, that would seem a little creepy… What do you mean creepy? She’s your friend! Shoot, I didn’t even tell her thank you for waking me up! Great going Asahi-

When Asahi entered the boys room, he was met with Kageyama being shoved into him, causing him to drop his bag.

“Ah! Sorry Asahi,” Kageyama apologized as Asahi bent down to pick it up.

“I-it’s fi-”

“Yeah Baka-yama! Say sorry!” Hinata shouted from across the room, sticking his tongue out at Kageyama.

“You’re the one that pushed me, dumbass!” Kageyama roared before storming back over to Hinata.

Asahi chuckled and made his way over to where Suga and Daichi were watching the pair fight from a safe distance.

“Hey, Asahi! Why’d you take so long to come up?” Daichi asked. He looked a little concerned, maybe even worried. Him and Suga really are just like his parents…

“O-oh no r-reason I-” he began. Asahi tried to avoid eye contact as his own voice began betraying him again. Eye contact was dangerous with these two sometimes, even if they were his friends. Both Suga and Daichi raised an eyebrow at him. “Um… I fell asleep on the bus a-and… (y/n) woke me up,” he muttered while getting quieter as he said your name.

“Aww, well isn’t that sweet!” Suga cooed with a teasing smirk. Asahi swore, whenever he brought you up when you weren't around, they were always quick to tease him. Maybe they are his parents…

Asahi felt a tiny blush begin to form on his cheeks as he stuttered “S-S-Suga, can we not talk about this right now…”

Daichi let out a disappointed sigh. “C’mon Asahi, you’ve basically had a crush on her since she became a manager. You gotta tell her already!”

“Tell who what?” asked Hinata who suddenly appeared beside Daichi. Asahi went stiff as a board, looking nowhere else than his shoes.

“Tell (y/n) that he likes her,” he heard Tsukishima say from beside Hinata. “What? Did you not know that he has feelings for her?”

“Wait, you mean… those kinda feelings?” Hinata’s voice got louder. It felt so loud that Asahi thought he was going to faint from the embarrassment.

Yamaguchi was quick to chime in with Tsukishima. “Well yeah! Hasn’t Tsukki told you this before?” How did they know?! Noya didn’t tell them… right?

As if on cue, Tanaka and Nishinoya also joined the conversation. “Yeah man! Who would’ve thought that Asahi would have a crush on such a hot girl like her, huh? What’d you think Noya?” Tanaka asked as he laughed along with the group.

“Asahi!” Noya yelled right into Asahi’s ear, scaring the living shit out of him. Almost the whole room went quiet. Noya pointed straight into Asahi’s face, causing his eyes to widen and look at his finger. Noya then began speaking as if he were talking of destiny, “Azumane Asahi, as Nishinoya (y/n)’s younger brother, and as her sole protector for life, I grant you permission for you to court her, and-”

“Oh please. Do you even know what the word “court” means when you say it like that?” Tsukishima snickered. Asahi’s body went cold with chills as his face flushed crimson. “You’re basically giving him permission to-”

“Would you guys shhhhhh!” Suga screamed at them before dropping his voice to a whisper. Oh thank God for Suga- “The girls room is right next door! They could’ve heard you for all you know! Have some respect…” Hinata squealed a ‘sorry’ and Tsukishima just walked away with a smirk. Noya gave Asahi a firm slap on the back. Everyone else that took part in the conversation left to do their own thing.

Suga put a gentle hand on Asahi’s shoulder, causing him to look into his eyes. “Look Asahi, whenever you’re around (y/n), I notice a slight change in you. You’re not super tense. You’re actually a lot more relaxed around her. You’re more confident and a lot more happy. She pushes you to do better unlike any one of us. You gotta tell her how you feel, and you have to do it soon, Asahi.”

“Yeah, and even if she doesn’t feel the same way, she isn’t the type of person to avoid you afterwards,” Daichi adds, giving him a reassuring smile.

Asahi blushed again before smiling at the ground. Is that really how he seems around you? Sure, some of what Suga said is true. He does feel a slightly bigger push when you’re the one to give pep talks before games, and it would be a lie to say that he wasn’t happier around you, but he thought everyone felt that way…

And the other things that Suga said? Asahi would just have to see for himself. Confess to you? Him, who has never been so in love with someone, and just happens to have no experience when it comes to that same department? He’s even surprised that words just came so naturally with you but confidence be damned! He never prepared himself for this!

Well, it is his third year after all… maybe he could learn a thing or two before ending high school. What does he have to lose?

“Y-Yeah...alright.”

There was a knock before the door opened. “Alright guys, meeting in the conference room in five. Dinner will be ready shortly after!” Coach Ukai yelled above the conversations. As soon as the team responded, one by one each boy began to leave the room. Daichi gave Asahi a small pat on the back before leaving with Suga. Soon, Asahi was the only person left in the room, and the only tension present was created within his thoughts.

___________________________________________________________

You leaned your head back and closed your eyes as you let the steam and heat of the bath allow you to unwind. Kiyoko and Yachi had already climbed in with you. You sat to the right of Kiyoko and Yachi sat on her left.

“Rough day so far, (y/n)?” Kiyoko asked with her usual calming gaze. You could tell why almost all the boys were so into her. Seeing Yuu, Tanaka, and even boys from other teams try to hit on her was one of the funniest things to you. There was no denying that Kiyoko is pretty, and she always had this earthly calm about her that you just couldn’t put your finger on sometimes. Kiyoko has been your closest girl friend since you started as a manager, and now even Yachi was one too.

“Yeah,” you groaned. It may not seem like it to everyone else, but you had been stressed almost since you woke up this morning. First, there was the tension of the boys first game. Then, Kiyoko had to run back to grab Hinata’s bag that he left at the train station. The stress went away slightly after the boys won the first game, but the tension was still there now that they have to win the next one. To top it off, the boys just found out at their meeting that they would be going up against the team was ranked #2 to win nationals. Not to mention, their setter (according to Kageyama) was on the All Japan Youth team. If that didn’t make everyone’s anxiety for this tournament any worse, you didn’t know what did. You’re definitely going to make sure that the boys settle down to get enough sleep tonight.

Kiyoko and Yachi listened as you went on your rant about the day. But as you continued on, you let something slip out. “Not to mention, I woke up Asahi on the bus today. Asahi of all people! Then when we walked back I didn’t even say anything! I got so caught up in my own thoughts that I didn’t even realize how awkward I was being…”

You paused, realizing what you just said. Your hands flung up to conceal the blush now forming as you muttered something incoherent about not meaning to say that.

“Honestly (Y/N), I think it’s pretty funny how you react around someone like Asahi!” Yachi giggled. Kiyoko must have been pointing things like that out to her…

Kiyoko smiled at you. “She’s right, you know. It’s almost like you two switch personalities when you’re together.”

You turned your body to face them. “T-that’s not true!” you argued. The massive blush on your ears and face said otherwise. “I’m still the same person!”

The bathing room went suddenly quiet as if they were silently disagreeing with you. You turned to face forward again. It was if there was still another question that hung in the air that remained unspoken. “(Y/N)?” It was Yachi that spoke up.

“Yeah?” you asked somewhat hesitantly.

“You’re not...nervous to tell him you like him… are you?” Yachi asked. Your breath shuddered. There it was, that unspoken question. While it might seem normal for a person to be nervous to tell someone they liked them, much less to feel nervous about other things, ‘nervous’ was not a trait among the Nishinoya siblings. In fact, no one believed you and Yuu have ever felt nervous before. Despite Yuu’s personality being different from yours, it’s still centered around that shared trait between the both of you. The Nishinoya siblings were known on the team for being the fearless ones, Yuu in his playing ability and happy-go-lucky attitude, and you with your confident decision making and ability to push each player to do their best. It’s what made you two so reliable. You and your brother never got nervous… right? You guessed maybe that should only be said of Yuu now. After all, how can someone have no fear if they can’t confess to a silly little crush…

Maybe that’s the reason you’ve never confessed. This entire time, you thought the reason you never told Asahi how you felt was because you didn’t want to mess things up between the two of you.

I’ve been lying to myself this whole time, you thought. But, I shouldn’t lie to my friends about it…

After a few more minutes of silence, you spoke up. “Yeah. I am nervous.” Both of your friends looked to you. As you continued, your voice became lower and quieter as you sounded out your thoughts slowly. “This entire time I’ve been telling myself that maybe it was better this way because he probably wouldn’t return my feelings, but I guess I’ve been stalling.”

“That’s ok (y/n)! It’s perfectly normal for someone to get nervous over someone they like!” Yachi reassured you.

“She’s right,” said Kiyoko, putting a hand on your shoulder. “Try to be yourself around him. He’s actually a lot more confident around you than you think, so it should be like having a conversation with someone like Daichi or Suga. Just try to take those baby steps, ok? If you talk to him tonight, tell us how it went afterward.”

You smiled timidly at your two friends. “Okay, I will.”

___________________________________________________________

You stared at your phone and groaned. 9:00pm.

The boys would not shut up.

While Kiyoko and Yachi were settling down into their own sleeping areas, you calmly went over and asked Daichi if he could settle down the boys a little. That was 30 minutes ago…

Oh well, you thought. Kiyoko and Yachi were asleep now, so you thought it would be fine. It had been a while since the team got to hang out as just a plain group of chaotic high school boys rather than a serious volleyball club. They’re on this trip to have some fun too.

But if they're not quiet by 10:00, you’re definitely making sure they actually fall asleep.

With a sigh, you turned off your phone and made your way across the dark room. Careful not to wake your friends, you tiptoed to your bag in the corner and fished out your favorite pajamas: an old yet suitable t-shirt and a fuzzy pair of light orange shorts.

After changing, you grabbed your small toiletry bag and walked out of the room. Across from the girl’s room was a small washroom that was shared among all three of the rooms. You were sure that no one would enter since all the boys were in their room and Ukai and Takeda went drinking again. The washroom was completed with two sinks surrounded by a wooden counter, and a public toilet further back in the room.

You set your stuff down on the sink closest to the door. As you started to brush your teeth, you questioned if you should stay up longer tonight than usual. You didn’t feel that tired yet, and you did hear that there is a balcony near the rooms.

You leaned over the sink to spit before faintly hearing the door open. You quickly spit out the excess toothpaste and wiped your mouth on your sleeve before looking to see who stood in the doorway.

“(y/n)?” Asahi stared back at you with his wide brown eyes. He had switched his tracksuit for a plain white t-shirt and a pair of grey sweats, which you assumed was his sleepwear. He had a small green bag under his arm. Was he washing up too?

“Oh, I’m sorry I thought no one would come in here,” you tried to laugh about it as you quickly started to pack up your toiletries. Damn, you’re just acting nervous around him again!

“No! You can stay, I’ll just come back later,” he smiled politely and turned to leave.

“Wait!” you called before you even realized what you were doing. Asahi turned to look over his shoulder, surprised. Baby steps rang in your head as you took a breath and said “There’s another sink if you want to use it…”

Asahi peered over your head. “Oh! Sure...” He walked past you to the other sink and you turned to your own bag. As you brought out a comb to run through your hair, Asahi started to run the water in his sink as he fished out his own toothbrush.

Almost on instinct, you started talking to yourself in your own head, even when you desperately wanted to talk to the boy next to you. Should I even say anything in the first place? No… baby steps (y/n)! Remember! Ok, what should I say? “So how do you think tomorrow will go?” No, the tension for tomorrow is already high enough. “Nice… weather? here? in? Tokyo…?” Goddammit why is this so hard-

You sighed through your nose and put your comb back. As you looked for the next thing you needed to find in your bag, your eyes slowly drifted to Asahi. He was looking at himself in the mirror as he ran a knuckle along his jaw and muttered something about needing to shave. You assumed he decided against it as he fished out a brush and a bottle of… detangler?

One part of Asahi was happy and glad that you were sharing the washroom with him. But, the majority of him was feeling like an anxious wreck. It was only three hours ago when Asahi had promised his friends that he would finally confess his feelings to you. And now you’re here with him, alone, and you haven’t spoken a word to each other. Maybe he should say something about it now, close the gap he so desperately wanted to reach. Was he ever going to get a good enough opportunity such as this (even if it was in a washroom…)?

As Asahi got out his brush and detangler, he decided that maybe he would just talk to you for now… yeah. But, what is there to talk about-

“Is that lavender detangler?”

He raised his eyebrows and turned to look at you. You looked first at the detangler in his hand, and then up at him with a quirked eyebrow and wide, expecting eyes. You held your face wash in one hand and a hair tie in the other. And those pajamas you were wearing… gosh you looked so cute.

“Oh… yeah. It’s kind of weird I guess,” Asahi chuckled and scratched the back of his neck.

“No, not at all,” you replied matter-of-fact. “I was actually kind of wondering why some parts of the gym smelled like lavender and I was trying to figure out who it was!” You laughed. It’s true, some corners of the gym started smelling oddly great (for a gym especially). When you asked Kiyoko and Yachi if they had bought new perfume, they both replied with no, and so you became suspicious.

When you turned away to wash your face, Asahi took out his bun and began his own nighttime routine. Your butterflies fucking exploded as you rubbed the face wash gently into your skin and listened to the soft spurts of his detangler.

___________________________________________________________

For the rest of your time in the washroom, both you and Asahi held great conversation. Though the time was little, the detangler topic led to both of you complaining about your hair consistency, to what color you both would want dye your hair, to favorite colors, to favorite school subjects, and then finally to what you were talking about now, favorite parts about school.

“Well that’s easy. Being the manager for the team,” you replied nonchalantly.

“Really?” Asahi packed up the rest of his things in his little bag and turned to you. He left his hair down. You were leaning against the door, your own bag under your arm. Seeing him with his hair down is having you battle the flutter in your stomach as you try to get used to the new sight.

“Well yeah, but I guess I have to thank Yuu though after all. If he didn’t play volleyball I would probably be tripping over myself in a dance club or something!” You both laughed.

He was still laughing as you caught a glance of his face. You wanted to see his smile more. You wanted to hear him laugh more. You just wanted to keep talking to him. This is the first time you’ve been able to have a normal conversation with him without stumbling over your words and you did not want it to end this quickly. But at the same time, you probably shouldn’t keep him if he’s tired.

Asahi felt a little conflicted inside. It was clear that both of you were done washing up, but he still wanted to confess, but… well maybe now isn’t the time after all. It was still great to talk to you though.

You opened the door and walked past the doorway. “So um, are you going back to the room?”

“Well, I guess. But I probably won’t be able to sleep because of the noise. That’s the reason I came to wash up a little earlier.” Asahi responded. The moment was slipping away...

Maybe that’s one thing to thank the boys for. But is there some way to keep talking to him? He obviously doesn’t want to be by the rest of the team. Maybe you could save him from them for a couple of minutes. But where-

“Um… a-are you tired?” This was about to take a lot of courage from you…

“N-no…?” Asahi was a little confused by your question. What were you about to ask him?

“Do you wanna go hang out on the balcony for a bit?” You finally said it. A huge weight was lifted from your shoulders, but the even larger weight remained as you waited for his answer. You squeezed your hands behind your back and gulped. You prayed that he didn’t notice how nervous you were…

Asahi just stared at you for about 2 seconds, because 2 seconds was all his brain needed to overcompensate and overthink everything you just said. Did you say hang out on the balcony? As in like, with you? Alone? Together? No one else is there, right? Why? Just to keep you company? Because he said that he didn’t really want to be by the rest of the loud and obnoxious team? Did you really care enough about that to invite him on the balcony? Did you actually like talking to him?

No, that couldn’t be true…

Right?

“Yeah. We could do that.”

___________________________________________________________

You stood on the balcony, eagerly awaiting Asahi. You leaned over the railing as you took in the cold evening. The wind blew just enough to leave a slight shiver through your body and stir your hair. The lights and sounds of Tokyo filled your senses as you watched the bustling city from afar. You took a look up. The pollution of Tokyo meant you couldn’t see stars, but you imagined they were there. There wasn’t a single cloud in the sky, save for the occasional airplane flying to or from the city. You brought your gaze back down and stared forward in silent thought.

Asahi was grateful that you had arrived at the balcony first after you both left to put away your toiletries. He tried his best to get into the room to put his things away, grab his jacket, and be out of the room where the boys were now playing truth or dare. Noya caught him and tried to convince him to join in, but he politely refused and left without another word. He would have to explain himself later.

And now, there you were. You didn’t notice him behind you on the balcony. His gaze softened as he took a moment to admire you.

You were the only thing that immediately captured his attention, as always. Not the blinding lights of the city beyond, not the atmosphere around him, just you, with your back turned to him as you faced Toyko. Asahi’s breath hitched in his throat. It was in that moment that he realized that nothing else mattered. Not even breathing mattered. The lights weren’t as beautiful, the city wasn’t as loud, and the chill in the air wasn’t as prominent. Everything else seemed to dull and fade, leaving only you.

Why?

There was just something more captivating in the way your hair flowed in the wind that he seemed to forget that the wind was the reason your hair moved so fluently. The way you were standing and observing the view, almost as if you didn’t know that if everything else had eyes, then everything would be gazing and admiring you just like he did every day. The way your eyes were shining so perfectly ahead that the stars would become jealous and try to take that shine, but he would never let them because no matter how high and mighty the stars might be, no matter how many of them there were, you were so much more above them in his own eyes.

His thoughts were broken when your body jerked in a slight shiver. He realized that you had forgotten a coat because you were still wearing the same pajamas.

It was a lot windier than you thought it would be. You wrapped your arms around yourself and rubbed your bare arms. You were in such a hurry to put your things away that you didn’t have time to consider the weather.

You jumped when you felt a slight pressure on your shoulder, and then something laying across them. As you reached your hands up to feel what it was, you ran your fingers across the material of a jacket, and then heard the shuffling of someone next to you. Then you realized…

Asahi was here, and he gave you his jacket.

You turned to look at him. He was standing about a foot away from you to the right. He had his elbows propped against the balcony railing as he leaned against it. His shoulders caved slightly inward as he stared at the ground. His eyes were casted downward in a way that he almost looked ashamed, but if not, then just lost in thought. A slight tint splayed itself across his cheeks from the cold. The wind moved through his long brown hair like a dance and ruffled his white shirt against the muscle that laid beneath.

Your heart caught in your chest. Your breathing stopped as you clutched the jacket.

This was a new sight. He didn’t look scared. He wasn’t smiling. He wasn’t sleeping. He didn’t look exactly concentrated either.

He looked… ethereal.

His eyes caught yours and he stood a little straighter. “I-I… you looked cold… so… sorry if it’s weird...” His eyes casted off as he spoke. He’s adorable.

“N-no” you assured. “Not at all! Um, thank you...”

“You’re welcome... “ he smiled at you before looking down again. It was odd. It wasn’t like his body was anxious, more like just his eyes were. Could he… maybe? Unless he was just trying to be nice.

You looked down and held the jacket closer to you. Your blush was growing by the second. It may be a possibility. The jacket smelled like the lavender detangler and cedarwood. Not only that, it was warm. It smelled and felt like him, like your Asahi. Well, he wasn’t yours just yet.

Just yet.

Asahi didn’t even know why or how he managed to give you his jacket. He just felt a surge of feeling that had him act. He knew it was love, but at that moment, he never felt it so strongly. It was almost as if it were his instinct to want to make you feel happy and comfortable. Maybe he should act on that more.

Maybe he should act on that now.

You talked up first. “So, um…” you mumbled just loud enough to be audible. “How are you feeling… about tomorrow?” You instantly regretted the words as they left your mouth. You couldn’t think of another topic, so you just blurted the first thing that came to mind.

“Um… well, if I said I was feeling alright about it, I would obviously be lying,” he chuckled.

“Well, I think you’ll be alright once you get out there and kick ass like always,” you said, trying to ease his nerves. You sounded so sure of yourself. That was new, especially around Asahi.

“(y/n)...”

“Yeah?”

“Thank you for supporting me…” he faced you as he leaned against the railing, smiling at you, though he didn’t make eye contact. “It really means a lot…”

You gave him your best smile while clutching his jacket. “No need to thank us. We all have to push our ace so he can do his best!”

He blushed. Something popped into his head, and before he could stop himself, he said it out loud.

“No one pushes me to do my best as much as you, though.” He scared himself when he said it. He couldn’t even turn away. He just… looked at you. You were still so captivating. So much so that his anxiety and fears couldn’t even distract him now.

You blushed. Did he just say that? Did he… there was almost no doubt now. Your heart started to beat so loud that you couldn’t focus on your own thoughts. You could only focus on him.

You were looking at him with those beautiful eyes again. This was it. Now. He had to do it now.

“(y-y/n)...”

“Yeah…?” You turned to him.

He opened his mouth to speak, but nothing came out. He couldn’t stop staring at you.

So captivating.

There you stood, patiently waiting.

“Asahi, are you-”

“I love you, (y/n).” And that’s when the words began to tumble out. “I can’t believe I’m doing this… but it’s the truth. Ever since you became a manager for our team, I’ve never been able to get you out of my head and... and, I’m not sure how to feel about it. You’re just beautiful, and strong, and perfect… A-and I want to give you everything. I want to give you… more than everything really. But I’m just...I’m just…”

He kept his eyes closed the entire time, brows furrowed and hands glued to his sides as he spoke. Were you actually hearing this? The person you’ve loved for so long confessing that he loves you-

You felt this buzzing, warm feeling inside your heart. It spread like wildfire throughout your body, burning you and your senses down to the one source of the truth behind the flames which is that he. loves. you.

He squinted as he opened his eyes to look at you. You looked… confused. You just kept staring at him. He felt this cold shiver as his cheeks flushed in embarrassment. He clenched his fists. Here it was, you were about to reject him. Why did he even try-

“I love you too, Asahi.”

“What?”

For a moment you two just stared at each other. You both couldn’t believe what you were hearing. Meanwhile, the same fire was spreading throughout Asahi. Burning down all insecurities, all negative thoughts. It was just that one fact.

You love him too.

And like fire, it spread throughout both of you quickly. Burning, destroying, until it bubbled over and-

That space between you ceased to exist as you stood on your tippy toes, grabbed him by the collar of his shirt, and kissed him. You didn’t know what you were doing, but you didn’t care. You’ve waited too long to tell him how you’ve felt and this kiss lifted the last weight from your consciousness. You didn’t have to pretend. You didn’t have to be nervous. You were free.

Asahi didn’t know how to feel at first. Was this actually happening? Were you… kissing him? Well, of course he knew that but he never thought it would happen.

He wasn’t kissing back. You opened your eyes and leaned back, separating you from his lips. Was that too far? “Ah, s-sorry I thought-”

You were cut off by him quickly swooping in and returning the kiss while leaning down to wrap his arms around your waist. You closed your eyes and kissed him back, wrapping your arms around his neck and tangling your hands in his long hair. His lips were warm and surprisingly soft. You giggled as the scruff from his stubble tickled you. His kiss was so gentle that it was as if he thought you were a porcelain doll, and that if he put too much of himself on you, that you would break. It was loving and sweet, and filled with as much care as he could give you.

When you both leaned back, he looked down at you. So small. So amazing.

So perfect.

Those were his words before he leaned again, pressing himself closer to you. Your back steadied itself against the railing as you continued kissing him. His hands travelled to cup your face, one hand resting itself against your soft skin and the other running itself through your hair. This kiss was just like the last but filled with more need and passion. The fire was growing. Here, nothing else mattered. The lights didn’t matter, the air, the city. Just you, with your lips on his.

When you leaned back again, he smiled as you kissed him on the nose. “Not as perfect as you,” you replied. You laughed as his face scrunched in confusion, and then when he realized what he had said out loud before he kissed you.

“So, uh, does this mean… W-well, only if you want to of course! But, ah, what I’m trying to say is-”

“Yes Asahi, I’ll be your girlfriend,” you said to him while rolling your eyes and smiling. It seemed that after your kiss, your confidence had returned. How could he kiss you like that but not be able to ask you out? He’s so awkward, and handsome, and yours.

Both of you chuckled, finally before leaning in again. Finally yours.

That’s when you heard the metallic door on the other side of the balcony open.

“HEY ASAHI- woah”

___________________________________________________________

"So that's when I opened the door, and Asahi and (y/n) were making out, and-"

"Noya, stop-" Asahi pleaded.

"Dang, who knew that Asahi had game," Tanaka wheezed.

171 notes · View notes

freezing-kaiju · 17 days

Text

ALRIGHT, IT'S TIME!

THE SECOND RYUKI-AND-BLADE-ACCOMPANYING ANIME POLL IS NOW HERE!!!

SO, MEET YOUR CHALLENGERS!

AJIN Demi-Human

youtube

We start with a dark horror and possibly scifi about ethics in science, immortality, and an outlaw fugitive alien plot as a boy finds himself part of a group of immortals declared legally inhuman. While I have some misgivings about Oh No I Was Secretly A Creature All Along plots, I do fucking love horror and there’s a lot of ways for those plots to hit hard in the trans and gay and autism organs and be really important!!!!

Dimension W

youtube

The New Tesla Energy Corporation has monopolized the fourth dimension and the coils that connect to it. A duo of bounty hunters, one human and one robot, make money via repossessing illegal coils and seek out the answer to the mysteries within the dimension. I really wanna watch this one for a few reasons, the primary one of which is 'there are multiple fat women'. It seems to have freaks and weirdos and fun times, and its comedy is emphasized more than most of the other ones on this list so it might give some needed levity!

Kyoukai no Kanata

youtube

A bumbling monster hunter with blood powers meets an immortal via trying to shank him and ends up in an arrangement where she'll keep trying to kill him to boost her confidence while hunting monsters in what I hope is a monster-of-a-week show that came highly recommended by a friend as her favorite anime, or one of her favorites, so i have high hopes! Script's by the hibike euphonium guy and the power system seems quite interesting!

Air

youtube

A puppeteer (if he’s as good as Sakon will remain to be seen) stops his Road Trip To Meet A Golden Sun Jupiter Summon to stay for a bit in a town and, as happens to anyone who stops for too long, gets attached to the place and also meets a girl who might be said jupiteresque being. My friend informs me that it's gorgeous, sounds amazing (so I'll make sure to get clips), and has "nice sad vibes"!!! And it’s…listed in a “provincial horror” listing… hoho

Heike Monogatari

youtube

A child who can see ghosts and the future walks tirelessly through the tragedy of the war between the Taira and Minamoto families before the dawn of the first shogunate. It's wildly beloved by a friend of mine, and also centers a historical event i know some but not all about and definitely need to know more about the Taira side of. Seems like a beautiful drama, one I could lose my heart over.

SSSS Gridman

youtube

Digital kaiju! Digital hero! Digital amnesia! A monster of the week show about an unknown amnesiac summoning and merging with Hyper Agent Gridman to fight digital, possibly virtual monsters while making friends(?) in the real world! It's the one thing Tsubaraya Productions has that isn't Ultraman, and I expect some tokusatsu vibes from it along with the mecha stuff, i've also heard it has gay girl megatron??

Akudama Drive

youtube

It's a prison break and crime story set in a tech dystopia, starring a scene girl shoplifter, and featuring a bevvy of unpersoned convicts in what seems like an excellent ensemble clusterfuck!!! The Danganronpa crew made this thing! It's also beloved by a friend of mine, and I've heard it'll be a generally excellent tragedy of a time

Canaan

youtube

A reporter gets saved from assassins by a woman she might do yuri with, and the summaries I’ve found seem to imply a plot about terrorism and mystery! It’s a Type-Moon work that isn't part of the fate, tsukihime, OR melty universes! It might still have magecraft, but it's tagged sci-fi too, and a type moon take on scifi sounds interesting... it’s also based on. *checks wikipedia* a…perfect-Famitsu-score visual novel for the Nintendo Wii. So I might need to dig out some old hardware to watch this thing. For fun’s sake!

Killing Bites

youtube

A guy unintentionally becomes the underground wrestling promoter of a ?werewolf? Woman who murders his friends and wins him a shitload of money. The end goal? According to the summary, control of the economy!!! This was recommended as garbage and good lord I need garbage so much good god I need to put some trash inside of me.

#kj grabs a megaphone #kj watches anime #polls #IF YOU WANT TO VoTE MULTIPLE OPTIONS PUT IT IN YER TAGS

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cozzzynook · 5 months

Note

OP and bee the best father son duo!!!

do ya have any stories with them? They're legit my favorites because of you <3333

Optimus and Bee go on road trips every few months. It started when Bee was a sparkling getting much too fussy to be healthy. So Optimus takes on the road for a short drive and when he tries to bring him back to base he just gets fussy all over again.

So Optimus has a choice to make, return to base and let Bee leak it out or pause his massive workload and enjoy time with his tiny sparkling thats beginning to learn to sit up on his own?

He doesn’t even remember to comm the others letting them know they’ll be gone for a week.

His processor completely forgets the moment Bee yawns calm again and is trying to take in the sights from his strapped in position in the front seat as he drives.

He takes his sparkling to see the sights of glowing energon falls and mountains of crystalized metal that shines like black jewels.

He tries to get Bee to sit up on his own but he refuses instead opting to try shoving black jewels into his intake that Optimus has to stop.

Just the two enjoying peace and quiet and Bee sleeping through an entire lunar cycle for the first time in a long while as Optimus does the same.

When they get back its complete chaos aboard the Ark but Optimus says its worth it.

#optimus prime #dad optimus prime #sparkling #bumblebee #tfa #tfp #transformers g1 #transformers cybertron #transformers beast wars #transformers idw

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comphy-and-cozy · 7 months

Note

Did I spend this morning rereading A Dream Come True again?

Yep. Zero regrets.

I wouldn’t object to peek ins on them if the urge ever hit to write more on this just saying 👀🫶🏻

this is very sweet and I am so very glad that you enjoyed it! because, well...

mastermind - jt compher

Pairing: JT Compher x Reader (f) - A Dream Come True universe

Word Count: ~1.8K

Author’s Note: I’m sorry Ghost lol

Warnings: references to sex, implied smut, language, the usual banter; otherwise, just some ~relationship development~ and an update on my fav duo ♥️🐙

link to series masterlist

January 2024

The email lies buried beneath the myriad of holiday marketing newsletters you ignored and let build up in your inbox. Sales that have long since passed, codes like ‘HOLIDAY20’ and ‘HAPPYNYE’ expired from stores you shopped at once and never unsubscribed from the marketing.

It’s a Wednesday evening, and you’re sitting on the couch doing your best to mass delete the influx of unread emails from the past three months after receiving the notification that your storage is running low. A knit blanket covers your legs, and the scent of tobacco and teakwood drifts to you from the candle on your coffee table.

“What’re you giggling about over here?”

JT’s low timbre echoes behind you, the sound followed by the soft padding of his feet as he approaches the couch with a bowl of popcorn. His favorite nighttime snack, you’ve grown to learn over the past three months, so you started stocking your pantry with a box.

You aren’t sure exactly when things became so domestic and natural with him, only blissfully aware of the steady thump of your heart in your chest when his texts come through or the warmth that fills you whenever he kisses you. You’ve managed to get comfortable with his presence, craving it the same way you crave a sweet snack before bed, but you’re still adjusting to the idea that this is real. That he’s still here, returning to your bed, dutifully—eagerly—after every road trip.

Every time, he’ll sigh, find solace in the warmth of your arms, press his lips against your skin. He’ll fuck you, God, he’ll fuck you; somehow never failing to reveal a new place inside of you that blooms pleasure. Your body has never sang the way it does for JT, expertly coaxing melodies out of you that you didn’t know you knew.

But sometimes, he just lays, content to feel your warmth against his, head resting heavy on your chest until his breathing becomes steady and sleep takes him. His expression softens, hair falling out of its styled coif, wrinkles settling into the lines of his t-shirt—if he hasn’t already removed it. In those moments, you defy the heaviness of your eyelids to simply gaze at him, memorizing the shape of him in your bed, curled up against you underneath the blankets that will forever be embedded with his scent.

You can’t decide which you like more.

“I just got an email inviting me to the Toast of Hockeytown event in February,” you reply, accepting the weight of him on the cushion beside you before you steal a kernel from his bowl—your bowl. “‘Fans can look forward to enjoying live entertainment, culinary delights, drinks, and desserts while mingling with the entire Red Wings team, coaches, select alumni, and other local celebrities.’”

JT hums. “Sounds like an event you can’t miss. A chance to meet them?”

“I better make sure I wear my nicest dress. One that really shows off the goods, don’t you think?”

“Definitely,” he agrees, eyes flicking to your chest—though it’s covered by a t-shirt, you can feel the heat from his gaze. “Think maybe you’ll get to fuck one of them?”

Laughter bubbles out of your mouth and you shove his arm at his crass joke. “It would be a good opportunity to try and snag someone’s number.”

“Oooh, maybe Larkin? He’s dreamy.”

“Nah, he’s too popular,” you shake your head. “Can’t aim so high as the captain. Gotta go for lower-hanging fruit. Maybe one of the new guys. Ghosty, you think?”

There’s the briefest flash in JT’s eyes that you would’ve missed had you not been watching for it. You catch it, though, smug with yourself that you’ve one-upped him at his own game.

“Heard his dick is small.” He feigns indifference, but you see the glint in his eyes. Your favorite eyes.

“You really want me thinking about Ghost’s dick?”

JT shrugs. “I’m the one sitting on your couch eating your popcorn. And I’m gonna be the one in your bed later.”

Check mate. The nonchalance paired with his confidence makes you weak—he’s right, and he knows it. You could have every one of them fawning over you, and you’d still pick him, every time. Once the joke falls and the silence settles, the sound of the Brooklyn 99 intro plays softly on the television in front of you.

As your mouse hovers over the ‘delete’ button, you’re reminded of the similar event you attended over two years ago—the one that led you to the man sitting beside you. You reminisce on how you spent days deciding on what to wear, even going so far as to get your hair blown out beforehand. Looking back, you’re a bit embarrassed at the effort, but as you feel the warmth of JT’s leg pressed against yours, you think to yourself it was worth it.

“I came to Denver specifically to meet you,” you blurt out, then freeze when you realize what you’ve just admitted to. Your heart thuds in your chest, the sound almost deafening in your ears as he pauses, three kernels of popcorn in his fingers halfway to his mouth.

Testing a glance at him, you’re surprised to see him pop each puff between his lips, one by one, taking his time chewing. Then, “I know.”

“You know?”

“You kn—the entire time?”

“The entire time.”

A sigh accompanied by a tidal wave of relief washes over you. If he knew, and was still here, it couldn’t have bothered him that much. “Do I want to know how?”

“Jus’ know,” he says with another shrug. Then your favorite glimmer shines in the warm chocolate of his eyes, the kind when he’s really feeling the banter. You love him like this. “You’re a bit of a whore when you’re desperate.”

“Joseph!”

An auburn eyebrow raises and he smirks. “You really gonna argue with me on that?”

Your silence is an answer enough, accompanied by flits of how he’s had you begging him on more than one occasion; you resist the urge to smack him at the smug ‘I told you so’ expression on his stupid, handsome face. “You’re not… creeped out?”

“Told you already,” he says around another mouthful of popcorn. “M’flattered. I think it’s cute.”

Heat simmers in your cheeks as you tell yourself you have no reason not to believe him; he’s still there, still eating popcorn out of the faded, red bowl you got from Target when you moved into your dorm at U of M.

It’s another few moments before he says something that catches you off guard.

“I came for you.”

There’s an air of hesitation about him, like maybe he’s been mulling it over as he finishes the last few bites of popcorn before offering you the remaining kernels in the bottom of the bowl. A peace offering, maybe, like he wants to even the playing field now that you’ve confessed something so private. Funny how this isn’t the first time this has happened to you with regards to him.

“What?”

“That night. At Tin Roof.” The second time we met.

“I know you did. You were inside me.”

JT smiles at your snark, a spark glinting in his eye as if he’s replaying the memory in his head. “No, I mean… I suggested that bar to the guys because I knew you were there.”

“What are you talking about?”

He clears his throat. “After we met—the first time—I spent an embarrassing amount of time trying to find you. I kept waiting to get a tagged photo from you, but never did, so… I started combing through my followers.”

Your eyebrows raise, heart swelling at the idea of making such an impact on him that he’d go through such an effort to find you.

“It took me awhile, but I finally found you,” he continues. “Imagine my disappointment when you were private.”

You hum, waiting with baited breath to hear the rest of his story. The memory of posting the photo of you and him comes to mind, his hand placement just visible on your side that gives you butterflies to this day, despite him having touched you far more intimately since then.

“I’d check back once in awhile whenever you crossed my mind. Still, private. I even made a habit of checking my DM’s in case you decided to message me after we won the Cup.”

“Hard to get,” you tease with a smile. “Gotta keep you on your toes.”

His eyes glint again, acknowledging your quip—because you sure fucking have kept him on his toes. “And then I got a call from Steve Yzerman.”

The breath in your lungs stands still.

“We talked—and I loved what he had to say, don’t get me wrong; Detroit really had been on my radar for awhile—but after I hung up the phone, I went to check your page. Figured it couldn’t hurt. And you weren’t private anymore. And, by all accounts, you appeared to be single.”

You’re doing your best to keep your jaw from resting on the floor, absorbing his candid confession with no shortage of disbelief. Part of you wonders if this is a long, elaborate play to tease you for how you lusted after him.

“Saw the picture of us,” he adds. “And the caption, too.”

A grin breaks out onto your face at his reference. It had been funny at the time, so far-fetched, unthinkable that the contrast between then and now hits you in the chest. Call me JT xoxo, it had said.

“Thought you said I wasn’t the reason you signed.”

“You were… encouraging,” he says with a smirk. You don’t miss the way his eyes dart down to your body. You don’t expect he meant for you to miss it.

As tempted as you are to take that concupiscent gaze and use it to quell the heat that’s simmering between your legs, you can’t resist probing just a little more to see what else you can glean out of him. “So… the bar?”

“Oh, right,” he blinks, like he forgot he was telling a story; you can practically see the dirty images conjured in his eyes as they float away. “Pretty straightforward, really—before we went out that night, I checked your story, on a whim. You tagged the bar.”

“Joseph Taylor Compher, were you stalking me?”

For the first time, a tinge colors the pretty ivory of his cheeks and his expression turns… bashful? “Does it count as stalking if it’s on your public page?”

“I’m sure the police might have something different to say,” you shoot back with a raised eyebrow.

“That’s only if I harassed you,” JT says. “And I’m pretty confident I did quite the opposite of that.”

He nudges your knee playfully, and you roll your eyes. “Yeah, yeah, you blew my mind, whatever, whatever.”

“You blew mine too, baby,” he adds, the tinge of huskiness in his voice undeniable. “But you knew that.”

And later, after he’s thoroughly appreciated your travel efforts to Denver, when your cheek is pressed against the warm skin on his chest, you whisper, “I can’t believe you were playing 4D chess this entire time.”

“What can I say? I’m a mastermind.”

#a dream come true #jt compher fic #jt compher fanfic #nhl imagine #nhl fic #hockey fic #jt compher x reader #anon asks

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juniperhillpatient · 2 months

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I love siblings that kill people for demonic sacrifices & desecrate the corpses while on a dangerous road trip on the run from the authorities….. especially when the brother is really angry & serious & the sister is a silly goofball….

(realized a hilariously specific recurring theme in my favorite fictional dynamics & felt the need to draw two of my fave duos together yes I know I’m not an artist but I like to have fun so sh)

#fun fact I really wanted the blood drip background but I don’t have red paint or nail polish or anything #so that is wax #my art #that’s just for the tag for self organizing purposes I’m aware I’m not an artist ok lmao #tcoaal #the devil’s rejects #house of 1000 corpses #3 from hell #the coffin of andy and leyley #baby firefly #otis driftwood #andrew graves #ashley graves #I know the road trip thing is from devils rejects but Otis’s house of 1000 corpses design is way more fun to draw #I know in my heart these 4 would either be best buds or they’d all kill each other #but I like to think they’d be best buds #now I kinda wanna write the fic #I can imagine Otis & Andrew sharing furious glares while baby & Ashley do some crazy shit 😂

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pookiethepotato · 8 months

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Road trip doodles (Marcy & Simon)

Omg im SO proud of the this drawing. I started out with the mouth and though “No way I can finish this- I never start from the mouth-“ I DONE PLAYED MYSELF- anywho enjoy my favorite duo 💚💚

Seeing if Simon looks cuter with more white in his hair- let me know if I should keep drawing him like that or not

#simon petrikov #fionna and cake #adventure time #stinky old man and his goofy lil (basically) adopted daughter #my love #adventure time fanart #doodles #marceline abadeer #my art #ice king #hes so babygirl #marceline

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kachuuyaa · 8 months

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BAY CITY ROMANCE 𖥻 003 𖥻 4REAL!

bcr masterlist ; prev ; next

synopsis. who knew an impromptu trip to familymart could be this cold?

warnings. CHUUYA AND RANPO RFIGHTING, gojo mention, horrible description of surroundings (nothing serious!)

notes. uhhh hehe hey...... heyyyy i know ppl wana throw tomatoes and stones but I'm back (I'm a senior now) LASO have u seen my bbgirls (choso mf kamo) debut in the shibuya arc trailerrrrr HEHEHEHE I LVOE CHOSOS SO MUCHH (follow me on twt! nikozaii if u want to hearmy insane shti) also i came back home from japan so uhhh hiiii the family,art here is loosely based on that one branch in tokyo near the hotel i stayed in

You set down your phone as your eyes flickered to the group. Ranpo, in particular, was staring out to Fyodor and Sigma, conversing about their rankings as you breathed out. You felt a gust of wind brush across your face, leaving a smile etched across your lips in tranquility. You looked towards Ranpo, that tranquility seeping into his veins as he met your gaze, making him open his eyes, letting his muscles rest as he blinked at you in recognition. “Hi,” You said, allowing Ranpo to revert to his usual expression. Crescent-shaped eyes paired with his signature mischievous smile, he adjusted his body towards you, sitting down on the soft grass as he pats the vacant space beside him. Of course, you took a step forward, the grass responding to your touch as you sat down. Grass tickled your back as you laid your palms on the soft floor. “What are we waiting for?” Ranpo mused, wrapping his arms around his knees, pulling them to his chest as he observed the duo before him. “For them to stop, I guess.” You shrugged, and Ranpo raised his hand. “Hey, guys! You both done talking?” He queried, extending the vowels of his last sentence to gain their attention, and, to his pleasure, two heads turned to the source as their conversations halted, and it was Sigma who spoke up. “Sorry! We were talking about earlier. It was such a hassle to get around the students.” He clasped his hands together, sending an awkward smile to the two of you.

“That’s okay, we were just about to ask you if you two were ready to go.” You reassured, Sigma sighing in relief at your words. Fyodor gazed at Sigma’s fidgeting hands, setting his hand on his shoulder, and observing the tiny squeak that left his mouth. “We can go now,” Fyodor said calmly, rubbing circles on Sigma’s shoulder as the latter nodded in agreement. Fyodor had a habit of tracing circles when he made contact with skin, an action of attempted comfort and for his entertainment. He knows that you don’t mind it, that you and the group were used to his peculiar habits. He huffed at this, returning his hand to its original position. Fyodor knew his habits were unusual actions that would be deemed atypical to other university students. Surely, he was a man of ambiguity shrouded in philosophies that you could never uncover, but with this enigmatic man came a plethora of tendencies that even he could not control.

The FamilyMart Fyodor talked about flickered with its signature white, green, and blue lights, highlighting the presence of the establishment, accompanied by banners outside the entrance, incorporating some of your favorite animes collaborating with the convenience store. To its right were a few potted plants, and a fluorescent street lamp illuminating the side of the road. To your left, you could spot the school’s covered court, blocked by cement walls that extend to the end of the street. The road was fairly empty, bikes only occasionally driving past the four of you as your group stared at the store. Waiting for Chuuya and Yosano left you bored, shoving your hands in your pockets, walking towards the establishment as the automatic doors slid open, making the bell ring as you were greeted by the cashier. You noticed Fyodor following suit, leaving Ranpo and Sigma outside to wait for the remaining two. As you turned back, you noticed Sigma examining the sunset, as Ranpo had his hands tucked completely in his jacket pockets, seemingly looking for his phone. Fyodor moved beside you, and your attention shifted towards him. “You looking for anything?” You asked, making Fyodor’s sharp eyes lock with yours then back to the food he was eyeing. “I wanted to try Onigiri,” He sighed, “been wanting to try it ever since I came here.”

You recalled the time Fyodor was introduced to Yokohama University. Assumptions of the new student quickly spread throughout the university, whispers and mutters about a foreign presence residing in the University you grew to find home. Of course, you weren’t an exception to the waves of utterances about the new student, who shares one class with you, and naturally, you felt drawn to listen to them. It was hard not to, as two particular friends of yours have brought you to hear their musings about the upcoming student. He carried himself with pride, his walk exuding confidence as his footsteps resounded around the hall. You remember meeting Fyodor once he stepped into the classroom as you stared at the door upon hearing its creak, followed by an apology from a foreign voice, making you perk up from your laptop. This action led you to meet the man who caught your eye, a wordless greeting formed by the color of your irises boring into his.

You never told him outright, but at that moment, it seemed a flurry of memories allowed itself to flood your mind, an endless stream of what ifs and countless possibilities presented itself to you, as if a layer of your consciousness knew he would remain with you.

That innate feeling you possessed suffocated you, that stem of anticipation twisting in your throat, a bud forming at every edge of your lungs, and at that moment, as two eyes locked, there, a blossoming flower could be found in your heart.

“[Name], look, I found Gojo’s donut,” He walked up to you, deciding to look around for a bit as you stood motionless. There were many more deserts to try, but it was the donut that really caught his eye. You snapped out of your reverie, which was, ironically, about him, only to be faced with Gojo’s smile plastered on the packet of the product he was holding. “That looks funny, is it supposed to be infinity-shaped?” You questioned, grabbing it from his hand, checking the back of it as you felt it around in your hand. “It’s cute, Fyo,” You hold it up to him, “You want it?” He nodded at your question as he took the donut back, and placed it in his basket (You wonder where he got it, but you suspected he quickly snagged one as you were reminiscing). You noticed Sigma and Ranpo from outside, conversing with each other as Sigma found himself to be the victim of Ranpo’s childish antics. “[Name], I got an iced coffee too. Do Sigma and Ranpo want anything?” Fyodor stepped out from the aisle, holding a carton of iced latte in his hand. You sighed, “Ranpo wants anything sweet. Maybe Dango would do, perhaps.” You weighed your options, while Fyodor grabbed shortbread cookies for Sigma to eat. He figured you didn’t want to walk outside as it would be a hassle, truth be told, he shared the same vision, so he opted to pick food for Sigma instead. Sigma made it clear that he was fond of cookies, the pastry always lingering in his mind whenever he was with the group. From cafes to grocery shopping, a pack of cookies always seemed to land itself in the cart, and you all knew that it was Sigma behind the action.

Your train of thought abruptly halted as the bell rang, signaling the entrance of another person. You had an inkling of who it may be, considering the road was void of any people as you entered. “Fyodor, [Name]!” The voice-- that awfully familiar voice, made your head perk up towards the door, seeing that familiar wave of black hair walk towards you. “[Name]!” She slung an arm over your shoulder, “Have you seen Fyodor? Chuuya wants a rice bowl-- you know, those prepared meals.” She lets go of you, nudging you in the process. “We all want those Blue Lock wafers, by the way.” She reminded you, as you rolled your eyes at her statement. “Mhm, yeah, right.” She laughs as she walks towards Fyodor, after grabbing a snack of her own. You picked an Onigiri out for you to eat, as well as one more for Fyodor. Juice… juice… You thought, skimming the rows of drinks, and picking one that caught your eye. You figured to get coffee for Yosano, if she hadn’t already, and one more for Chuuya, just in case.

Minutes pass as the group awaits your exit from the entrance. The moon decided to make itself known, accompanied by cold gusts of wind to all citizens of Japan. The wind was particularly comfortable, basking in the presence of passersby who felt its touch on their skin. You and your group were no exception to that. Sigma exhaled, crossing his arms, which helped alleviate the cold atmosphere surrounding him, even by just a little. They focus their eyes on the group paying for the group’s meal on the counter, then to the bickering duo to her right. “How does it feel being top 2, huh?” Ranpo provoked Chuuya, who was wearing a strained smile. “How does it feel being the next victim of my fist, huh?” He responded, gritting his teeth in an attempt to hold himself back from hitting the prodigious student. “Try it!” Ranpo giggled, running away comically as Chuuya spewed out curses towards him. Yosano sighed in faux annoyance, “These guys don’t know when to calm down, no?” She turned to Sigma, who chuckled under his breath. “Sometimes I wonder if they’ll ever stop.” He said.

“What are these two idiots doing?” You stepped out of the store with 2 plastic bags in your hand, clicking your tongue as you stared at Chuuya and Ranpo. The latter, as usual, purposefully spurs Chuuya on as he shouts at him, “You were the one who ate the last piece of my fucking milk bread?!” He looks over to you, “[Name]! Kill this idiot!” He points at you, grabbing the collar of Ranpo as he raises his hands up in surrender. “I said I was sorry!” He repeats, making Chuuya let go of him with a sigh. Ranpo brushed his sweater, sighing in relief, earning a glare from the hot-headed man. Chuuya walks up to you, shoving his hands in his pockets to warm his hands, “You got my food, [Name]?” He questioned, with a voice uncharacteristically soft compared to the tone he used on Ranpo. “Yeah, yours and Yosano’s are in this one over here.” You handed him a bag, which he took while muttering a ‘thank you’. “I’m getting tired, [Name], Fyodor.” Yosano quipped, “Sigma here is also a bit tired. We might go for the night.” She informed you, and you nodded in return.

The group decided to split ways, waving goodbye to each other, as well as throwing in heaps of congratulatory statements for everyone present. The atmosphere was chilly walking back, the flickering of the lights, with the melody of your footsteps, were the only sounds accompanying you back to your own dorm. It felt oddly calm, the noir of the night engulfing your shadow as the light of each lamp danced in your eyes, your footsteps blending in with the symphony of the dark, performing an orchestra of elements that welcomed itself in you. What you didn’t know, is that amidst the melody of nature and the song of the city that you were so used to, comes a whole different, unfamiliar tune that you were yet to experience.

trivia:

fyodor really wants his blue lock wafers

yosano's favorite character is chigiri who else cheered

fyodor likes yukimiya LOL reo is a close second

ranpo LOVESSSS BACHIRA (hes js like me… bachira 4life)

chuuya likes chigiri too… chigiri and kaiser he thinks his tattoo is cool

ranpo found a nearby gashapon and spent 1000 yen on it (he got what he wanted on his last try)

you found a stray cat meowing as you arrived at your dorm. he was a greyish-white cat, with a streak of green. an unusual color for a cat, but he was cute nonetheless.

ranpo followed yosano and chuuya home, wanting to spend the night with them

your roommate was nowhere to be seen when you arrived, but they bought a tub of ice cream for you as an apology. you texted them with the note and ice cream they left you and they laughed at it, responding with a quick no worries, and an apology for their absence.

chuuya actually wanted a carton of sake, but he refused at the last second.

tg: @iruc @celestair

2023 © kachuuyaa. do not steal or claim my work as your own.

#bay city romance #bsd x reader #bsd smau #bsd angst #bsd fluff #bsd crack #bungo stray dogs x reader #bsd x you #bsd headcanons #bungo stray dogs smau #bungo stray dogs x you #bungo stray dogs fluff #bungo stray dogs angst #bungo stray dogs fanfic #kachuuyaa

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scottsummersbingo · 7 months

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For the Sexy Days of Summers Event happening right now we've invited Scott Summers (Cyclops) fans to take part in spreading more love for him out there on the internet by creating fanfiction, fanart, fan works, etc. to celebrate our favorite X-Men leader and the possibility of what if. For the duration of this challenge so far we've received some really incredible submissions with super rare pairings that are new to us. For the month of September we'd like to share some of those and also share some various fandom creations along the way in terms of content. Some might be an old favorite pairing while others might be something in terms of shipping you've never considered before.

Today's spotlight pairing is another pairing that picked up some traction during the X-Men Evolution days.

Below under the cut you can take a look at this pairing and see what fun it could prove to be!

Also if you have a favorite Scott pairing and a fanfic that you've written or that you love, then feel free to drop us a note and let us know so we can showcase it in the future!

Stay tuned for more duo spotlights coming soon!

Cut a Rug - A Gift for Tasseomancy by Maedelin (Rated T) During the first Hellfire Gala, Cyclops and Rogue steal a moment.

Touch by Kount_Xero (Rated M) A short time after the battle with Apocalypse, Rogue is having trouble adjusting to life. Her fear of touching, coupled with strange dreams about Cyclops, is driving her up the wall. What she doesn't know is that she isn't going towards a wall, but towards a secret kept beyond it.

The Rest of the World is Noise by Kount_Xero (Rated E) During Scott and Rogue's journey to the Academy of Tomorrow, in a roadside motel, one night.

Mouvement by Kount_Xero (Rated M) Scott and Rogue on the road to Academy of Tomorrow, trying to cross the distance between who they were and who they are going to become.

The Dividing Line by Kount_Xero (Rated E) Scott and Rogue have made it to the Academy of Tomorrow, but all is far from well as Rogue is slowly slipping away. As the line between herself and the echoes of all she's absorbed is slowly fading away, Rogue finds that there is only one person she can turn to: Scott Summers.

Out of Touch by Kount_Xero (Rated T) Rogue leaves the Institute to go back to her home, to find out what her name was and to recover a piece of herself. On the way, she runs into a familiar face: Gambit, stranded on the side of the road.

Untouchable by Kount_Xero (Rated M) Ms. Marvel arrives at the Institute as a show of solidarity on the eve of the Mutant Registration Act being put to vote. During this tumultuous time, Charles Xavier's ghosts come out to haunt Rogue and Scott... and force Rogue into a confrontation that will change everything - herself, the world and the X-Men.

Road Trip by roguewords (Rated G) Rogue and Scott take a trip.

Fools Who Fall Behind by roguewords (Rated M) "She says that love is for fools who fall behind, And I'm somewhere in between, I never really know, A killer from a savior"

A Modern Day Fairytale by roguewords (Rated G) This is no fairytale.

The Man Underneath by GammaGaze (Rated T) Scott Summers (a.k.a Cyclops) is the fearless leader of the X-Men. People think he has it all and has it easy. Little do they know about his life and his past. When things unravel, will he still be calm and composed or will he turn to his old self?

This story takes place when Scott is still in Bayville High and Jean and Duncan are in a relationship.

Thrill Sex With Scott and Rogue by MarvelMaster616 (Rated E) Rogue wants to spice up her sex life with Scott. So she convinces him to have sex in the most dangerous place imaginable. Wolverine's bedroom.

X-men Supreme: Scott and Rogue's Outdoor Romp by MarvelMaster616 (Rated E) This takes place in my X-men Supreme Series. Rogue and Scott enjoy a sunset that quickly gets heated.

X-men Supreme: Scott and Rogue's First Time by MarvelMaster616 (Rated E) This takes place in my X-men Supreme Series. Rogue and Scott are dating. This is their first time together.

Reflux by blueskypenguin (Rated T) “Rogue,” the groan from the region of her feet drew her attention immediately, and the bowl clattered to the floor, spilling milk and soggy bran flakes everywhere. Rogue dropped to her knees into the stuff, and it began to seep into her jeans. She didn’t notice, as Scott Summers gave a relieved smile from his prone position on the step before passing out.

Close Your Eyes by DallonR (Rated T) Scott and Rogue both know how it feels to not be in control. When Rogue decides to trust Scott, she finds that she probably trusted him with a little too much.

Sunshine by sarcastic_fina (Rated T) Rogue and Scott are expecting their first child. Unexpected complications change their future, leaving Scott unsure how he's going to go on.

Falling Slowly by flareonfury (Rated T) How Scott and Rogue slowly fell for each other... Basically deleted/alternate scenes in Seasons 1 and 2.

Of Dreams and Red Socks or the Lack Thereof by angeladex (Rated T) “Scotty’s an obedient kid, believe it or not,” Jack was saying, bragging to his weird friend. “Ain’tcha Scotty-boy? I always thought so. Took ‘im offa the streets myself, ‘bout a year ago, y’know. He does whatever I tell ‘im to.”

A firm shove, and Scott was mobile; he kept his face carefully neutral as he felt the barrel of a gun at his back.

Scott dreams a dream, has a conversation about it, and gets his butt kicked at cards. Probably. Set directly after "Turn of the Rogue." Scott/Rogue -ness with a nod to the Dysfunctional Teen Mutant Club. Because I like it.

And many more at AO3 here.

#scott summers #cyclops #scottsummersbingo #scott summers bingo #sexy days of summers #rogue

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themosleyreview · 19 days

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The Mosley Review: Late Night with the Devil

The easiest and sometimes over saturated genre of horror is the supernatural. Specifically, dealings in the occult, religious themes and the occasional demonic possession arc of a story can be fun, if its with a fresh take. Honestly, I believe every year there is at least 4 different possession films alone and they all are sourced back to the church one way or another. Every once in a while, you get a possession story that has a unique twist on the genre. This film takes not only the psychological road, but also the skepticism and illusionary work and I loved every second of it. The documentary / found footage element truly works in its favor in keeping you immersed in the story and the characters in a way that was refreshing and exciting. Its a small and contained story that felt more like a stage play at times than an episode of a late night talk show which also is a major plus.

David Dastmalchian is one of the most underappreciated character actors working in Hollywood and as Jack Delroy, the host of Night Owls with Jack Delroy, he shows that he can most definitely hold your attention as a leading man. The emotional depths he takes Jack on in some of the most subtle ways in his eyes was magical. Jack was definitely the classic portrayal of ambition and selfishness that overtakes his care for those he calls friends. I was absolutely enthralled with his performance and I can't stress enough how amazing he is. Rhys Auteri was fantastic and heartwarming as his sidekick, Gus McConnell. The two of them are your classic duo of host and comedic relief, but you get a deeper look into their friendship and I loved how he was the voice of reason in many scenes. Gus gets a moment that was visually grotesque and awesome in practicality. Josh Quong Tart was perfect as their greedy and intense producer Leo Fiske. Fayssal Bazzi was great and fun as a the first psychic guest Christou. I liked that through him, we see the level of skepticism in motion and the first taste of the paranormal that may or may not have happened. Ian Bliss was truly one of the biggest standouts and a great antagonist as the magician turned skeptic, Carmichael the Conjurer. Even though he was such a condescending and sometimes obnoxious guest, he had truly great arguments. He had the juiciest dialogue in the film as well. Laura Gordon was excellent as the parapsychologist and author, Dr. June Ross-Mitchell. Her connection to her patient was never understated and it was tense with every warning she gave about how unstable things could get. Ingrid Torelli was outstanding as her patient Lilly D'Abo. There are so many layers to her performance and the many visual tricks that are displayed on and around her. Once she becomes possessed, she gives a great physical performance even if its a bit brief. The amount of time used in her demonic state was well utilized and I liked that even when she wasn't under control of the other being, there was a sense of something clawing at the surface of her mind.

The score by Glenn Richards and Roscoe James Irwin was excellent and I loved the theme of the talk show and how much of an earworm it became for me. The use of silence is well used to punctuate the level of terror and eerie visuals. There are so many subtle touches visually happening at all times and one of my favorites happens once Lilly arrives. The cinematography was outstanding and I loved that the aspect ratio was correct for the time period and how the backstage footage was captured in black and white. It was a great breathing point for the narrative and the characters. The cgi effects that happen in the last bit of film sort of ruined the magic a bit and I wished that was more subtle in execution. With a genre that is overly saturated with the same type of story, this film truly takes a trip down an untapped avenue of the supernatural horror spectrum and it was a welcomed one. This was something truly special. Let me know what you thought of the film or my review in the comments below. Thanks for reading!

#late night with the devil #david dastmalchian #laura gordon #ian bliss #fayssal bazzi #ingrid torelli #rhys auteri

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heloflor · 2 years

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A few random thoughts/comments after finally reading the Sam and Max comics (Surfin’ the Highway + “The Big Sleep”) :

- I absolutely love how, whenever they’re in town or in an open place, there’s stuff happening in the background. Random details like that don’t really have any purpose in the story but they make the world feel so much more alive !

- I’m really fond of the way Purcell draws Sam for some reason. Idk, his face is just pleasant to look at.

- Max is getting the Pikachu treatment, looking chubby/chonky in the first interpretation of the character only to look thinner later on.

- It’s very interesting to see how the first “official” Sam and Max comic, “Monkeys Violating the Heavenly Temple”, introduces so many moments that became recurring things (“Sam, I mean Max”, Max being the one who needs saving, Max not being into girls, “you crack me up little buddy”, the fight for the phone, Sam’s long-ass “holy-“ lines, Sam being overprotective, Sam finding Max cute etc)

- It’s also interesting to see “Bad Day on the Moon” in comic form and the few differences with the cartoon version.

- I love how everytime they walk to their office door, they check on Flint Paper. Also Max mentioning how Flint probably wasn’t hugged enough 🥺

- I need an entire series of Sam and Max going on a road trip ! Not only can we have small adventures with new environments and characters, there’s also their cute interactions in the car !

- It’s funny to see places and characters you know are going to come back later on in the franchise, like the carnival from “Hit the Road”.

- I kinda like the random intermission in the long comics, though it feels like a random commercial that’s somehow relevant to the comic. Also that page about the board game to play in a car trip with the advice of “if you don’t have dice, just look at the last number of the plaque from the next car that’s coming” is absolutely genius.

- There’s SO MUCH TOUCHING between the two, especially on Sam’s end ! Like, dude can’t keep his hands away from his bunny ! Ok I may be exaggerating here but still ! So much touching ! And between that and other small moments, it makes me low-key question if they were already boyfriends back then 🤔

(I swear “Purcell wanted to create goofy stories with a fun duo but ended up accidentally creating an amazing and healthy gay relationships with pretty good rep overall and ultimately decided to just accept it and roll with it” is my second favorite thing about this franchise)

- Speaking of which, there’s that one moment in the second road-trip comic in which Sam uses Max as a weapon and then immediately asks Max if what he did was alright or if it bothered Max. And I absolutely adore that.

I think it’s due to the fact that, usually, Sam and Max are on the same wavelength and know each other’s boundaries and likes/dislikes. So it’s interesting to “come back to a time” where they still had to understand those boundaries. I also love how asking this is literally the first thing Sam does, showing that there’s really good communication between the two, which could also explain why in later entries they understand each other so well.

(and sure, I know moments like this one happened in other entries of the franchise, like for example Sam in 301 telling Max he's uncomfortable at the idea of Max teleporting alone, but for some reason this panel really stuck with me)

- The office each time having different framed pictures of the duo like in the cartoon 💖

- As someone who loves when anthropomorphic characters behave more like animals, I am so happy that the comics mention Sam smelling stuff a lot and especially Max having good hearing at least once ! Because this is something I really liked to think about, so it’s nice actually getting to see it being mentioned in canon !

Also there’s that one page (I think in “Bad Day on the Moon” ?) where Sam straight-up bites someone and then gets weirded out by his own action. That was fucking amazing.

- Apparently one of Sam’s favorite things during missions is cornering the villain and telling them to freeze with his gun pointed at them. For some reason I really like that fact.

- The comic about the cereal aisle monster has some pretty good action and a cool monster design. Also apparently Max already had weird powers back then with him being able to communicate with the dead.

Also also Max at the end helping a kid while casually talking to Sam was really cute. Fun fact : Max having baby fever and loving kids is my favorite thing about him, especially due to how much it clashes with his usual “wilder” personality (And for those wondering, my favorite thing about Sam is him being protective and going apeshit when Max is in danger).

Also also also it’s pretty funny to see Sam disliking physical contact from the shopkeeper given how touchy he is with Max in those comics.

- There’s a one-page comic about a lady talking about aliens with Sam not buying any of it, and one of the panels is Sam with a glass of water in hand saying “Lady, I’m this close to pouring my drink on you” while looking completely done with this shit. Hands down my favorite comic panel of all the Sam and Max comics.

(Btw, my second-favorite panel is from the first comic, after Max was kidnapped, when Sam is spitting on a portrait of the villain while pointing out how he’s going to destroy him if he took a single hair off of his precious bunny)

- It’s pretty funny how the comics suddenly start having colors at some point out of the blue, like someone randomly gifted Purcell a box of colored pencils. Though, I don’t know what I like most between the black-and-white or the colored comics. On one hand, the colors add to the background. On the other hand, the black-and-white gave a style that’s pretty fitting with the titular characters being detectives/police.

Ultimately, I think I like the black-and-white more, not just because of the style but also because like half of the stories in color are AU stuff (“The Adventurer” comics) while the black-and-white ones are more “grounded” stories.

Yeah, most of the time, I’m not the biggest fan of AUs. I know, pretty surprising for someone whose first fandom was Unde//rtale of all things.

And yes I learned later on that the first comics actually came out in a colored version. That being said I do like the black-and-white version more since, again, it gives them a “detectives” vibe.

- Sam really has a thing for twin popsicles, doesn’t he ?

- Some comics, especially the ones in color, have a few small “mean-spirited” moments between the duo, especially on Sam’s end, and it feels weird to see them like that. Like when one says “shut up” to the other, when Max does something cruel and Sam points it out by actually calling him cruel instead of cute, or when Sam jokingly threatening to hurt Max for being annoying, including the “killing Max and being sent to heaven” comic.

Now I know those jokes also exist in the rest of the franchise, like for example the “I wanna write a reminder to smother you with a pillow in your sleep” from the first Telltale game or the “shut up it’s starting !” from the cartoon, or even some moments in “Hit The Road” like when you rescue Max at the golf game. But for some reason, the ones in the comic stand out more to me.

I think it might be due to the duo dynamic they have and how much more openly affectionate they are in the games and cartoon, making those “I’m going to hurt you” jokes feel insignificant. 🤔

- There’s a comic about Atlantis that opens up with Sam mentioning how he “never dated within my gender” and I don’t know what surprises me the most between Sam unironically saying this, as if open to the idea, or the fact that they used the word “gender” in a comic form the 90s. In any cases, I like it.

(Also I guess this means Sam and Max weren’t together back then ¯\_(ツ)_/¯ Unless you picture the comics as taking place out of order, which I might do considering that one Christmas comic with the duo living in a house and having a family dinner. Plus this could explain the “mean-spirited” stuff only being in some comics. Also the cereal aisle comic has a guy from the cartoon + Max having powers, so I could see it taking place around the time of the cartoon, after the Telltale games)

- Sam with abs from that one biker comic is cursed. Chubby Sam with “uncool 40 years-old dad” energy is best Sam.

- And from that same comic, Max gets a tattoo on his right arm. Headcanon that he still has it but it’s hidden under his fur, hence why it’s never visible.

- I love how “The Adventurer Comics”, “The Big Sleep” and the first page of the unfinished comic are just casually available to read on the official Sam and Max website.

- “The Big Sleep” was apparently written around the time of “Save The World”, and I feel like you can kinda see it from the way Max looks in this comic. They removed the chonk in favor of a rounder stomach that resembles his 3D model.

Also I really like how this comic has Sam in danger and Max trying to save him, with Max’s last line of the comic showing some protectiveness. Given how rare it can be at times, I like when they switch around which one needs saving.

Also also this comic has Max calling some guy gay and later on almost saying “piece of shit”. I love it.

Also also also, there’s a cameo of granny Ruth as part of Sam’s memories !!! (along with a picture of Max because of course 💖)

Last thing, since earlier I mentioned the “mean-spirited” moments : this one shows my point by having Sam mentioning bashing Max in the head to help him calm down, with Max reacting by saying “aww, you spoil me !” This is the kind of instance where a joke is actually not mean-spirited because there’s something immediately afterwards showing that Max is enjoying the thought, while in the older comics, it’s just Sam mentioning hurting Max without Max commenting on it, which gives off this “mean-spirited” side.

- There are at least two comics that I’m missing, or at least two that I’m assuming are official. Given how the franchise started with Purcell drawing after his brother’s stories, I’m pretty sure there’s a lot out there that was never published (for those asking, yes I stumbled across some of the earliest versions of those characters from back when Purcell was messing with his brother’s work).

But yeah, from what I know, one of the missing two has a page with Sam and Max pushing n*zis off a cliff, and the second one has a joke about Sam asking Max to remove what he’s wearing and Max refusing, with I think some kind of stereotypical tribe behind them ?

- Thinking about it, I’ve seen people talk about how trigger-happy Sam and Max are in the comics compared to the rest of the franchise, with them being toned down due to age rating. But tbh, I didn’t find them that trigger-happy in the comics, at least not more than the games. They felt pretty on-par with how they act in “Hit The Road” specifically. Might be just me tho 🤔

- Overall, I’d say my favorite comic is “The Big Sleep” due to the whole “Max saving Sam” situation. But more than that, I especially adore how evident it is that Max absolutely loves Sam without outright saying it. It’s shown very well with how worried Max gets, the fact that he greatly compliments the doctor at some point or even the way he decides by himself to investigate the phone because he feels uneasy about the bug and wants to find out what happened to Sam.

This comic aside, the road trip trilogy is a close second and I especially enjoy the moments with the duo in the car, like Sam telling Max a creepy story or them sleeping while still having the car on, etc. I’d probably put the very first official comic as third, mostly for how many recurring things this comic sets up + the usual “Sam saving Max” being nice to see. And the unfinished “Max getting shot” comic would be fourth, because angst is my jam.

#Sam and Max #SamandMax #Freelance husbands #sorta #Flor talks #long post #for some reason I kept hesitating to post my Sam and Max stuff #I think it's because the fandom is decades old and had a resurgence last year #so it feels weird to jump in and start analysing stuff that was likely already talked about #idk I just feel awkward #but at the same time I like rambling about stuff so ¯\_(ツ)_/¯#(no but seriously it's been so long since I first wrote this #that I'm starting to wonder if the two comics I'm missing are actually from Sam and Max #or if it's from another franchise and I'm picturing it as Sam and Max for some reason)

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ettawritesnstudies · 11 months

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Hi scholar

Please describe your current wip (you decide what that means) in bullet points. They can get out of hand, that's fine.

I'm not currently working on anything in particular but I've had vibes rattling around in my head for a couple months:

Road trip story?

If it takes place in the US: appalachian towns - nature versus industry and rural places that used to rely on factories that have long since shut down, the rust belt, love letter to fly the communities built in fly over country but also horror of communities gone sour

The isolation of a space station like the insular nature of a college campus: its own little thing even if its surrounded by towns

space stations as a series of stops on a turnpike between planets

the liminal spaces of gas stations and foreign mcdonalds where you lose your favorite coffee mug

the concept of having a companion

- Voyager and her little robot buddy from Pale Blue Dot

- The Doctor and his companions from various times and places

- romance duo?

Exurba2 video on fucking off into the woods by hiking the Appalachian Trail

Road trips as a long fuckin drive being a version of the ancient epic poem myths like the Odyssey (long fuckin boat ride) and Journey to the West (long fuckin horse ride) and hiking the AT (long fuckin walk) and how people have been complaining and telling stories about going a long fuckin distance for a really long fuckin time

Journey before Destination as a whole concept and also an Oath in the Stormlight Archives where you're empowered by acknowledging you're Not There Yet

Head and the Heart Song Vibes

---- Ghosts

---- Rivers and Roads

Who do you leave behind? Who's waiting for you back at home? (Again, Penelope from the Odyssey). Are you ever going home or was this a leaving for good where people gave you a sending off party (or three)? Did you run away? Did you slip away unnoticed and unremembered?

If there is a Destination why is it so important? What do you have to look forward that keeps you plodding forward? Built in character development baybeeeee

The song "Here I Am" by the Crane Wives but specifically the lines: "This ghost town is making a ghost of me" and "I come from a long line of people who believe in the flowers that grow in the cracks in the street."

These particular pictures from road trips with my family and boyfriend that we titled "The End of the Road" and decided would make fantastic album covers

#end of the road #road trip wip #etta rambles

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dedskul · 2 years

Text

The Only Thing That Seems Fair

The sheer numbers of roles that you fulfilled in my life were almost suffocating

You were my mentor

My teacher

My therapist

My confidant

My best friend

My role model

All blended together

With an over-arching motherly attitude combing your roles like glue

How was I supposed to feel about you?

We were close

That was obvious to anyone and everyone

You're friends and collogues donned me with the nickname

Beth's sidekick

It was funny

You'd laugh and roll your eyes but I'd stand proud with my chest puffed out and a smile on my face

So happy and excited because for once I finally felt like I belonged

I was a part of something

Grouped in with YOU

I felt like I was living in a dream world were everyone was nice to me

Where people listened to what I had to say

Where my voice and my experiences were not only validated

But all the unpleasant things about me were too

Behind closed office doors and hotel rooms with do not disturb signs

Late night phone calls

Sunset evenings sitting in the trunk of my Jeep

Breakfasts at your favorite restaurants

Dinners at mine

Things were different

And ever evolving

I felt like a different person when I was alone with you

And maybe I was

My name replaced with

Sweetie

Honey

Sweetheart

Baby

I wasn't April and I wasn't acting like her

But I was defiantly putting on an act

I became whoever you wanted me to be

I did everything you told me to do

Everything you told me to say

Followed the same song and dance routine for three years before you turned your back and gave up on me just like everyone else

Leaving me alone to pick up the pieces

To lie to my friends and all the people I'd met over the years

To disappear into a void of depression, alcohol, drug abuse and self loathing.

But its been 10 years, right?

A fucking decade I've been struggling

Carrying the weight of you wherever I go

Tripping

Stumbling

Falling down

Getting back up

Gritting my teeth

White-knuckling my way though life

But no one ever sees it

Its never acknowledged because its the only way people know me now

Its my new normal

I've buried you and all of the parts of myself that drove our relationship into the ground

Good and bad

And left them to rot in the place where my heart used to be

I died ten years ago and walked into my own funeral disguised as a court hearing

I think a part of you died then too

Because that woman who sat across from me in the aisle was almost unrecognizable

You were a shell of a person

And I was a walking corpse

The prefect duo

Its no wonder why I feel like an imposter

For one I'm not actually dead

And if you were to ask anyone in my day to day life

I'm very much alive and well

Doing better then ever some might say

But that's not really the case

I'm a traumatized, pessimistic people-pleaser

I'm depressed, lonely, and fucking starving for anyone's attention or love

But that's not how it comes across

Because I get compliments

People telling me I'm easy-going

Funny

Loyal

Hard-working

Independent

I can't take any of it seriously

All it means is I've gotten better at hiding it

Over the years the weight has stayed the same and I've simply gotten stronger carrying it around this whole time

But that doesn't mean its not still there

I know its still there

Because it still all that I can do

I can't pick up anything else without my knees buckling

I can't commit to anything

A job

A house

A girlfriend

I've dated the same woman for 8 years

Lived with her for 7 years

And still can't look her in the eyes and to say yes when she asks me to marry her

I can't commit to a tattoo design to cover up the scar on my leg

Because no matter what gets inked into my skin

Your name will forever line my thigh, my memories, my dreams, and the rest of my life

I've tried to grieve

To let it all go and move on

But I can't heal in the same place where I was hurt

Its so hard to drive down the same streets

I pass by ROSMY twice a day

Every day on my way too and from work

And once every few months I'm forced to drive down the same road you and I used to frequent often

Park on the same street you and I did

And walk into the building right across the street from the one I'd spent countless hours with you in

I'll sit in my psychiatrist's office thankful her office window is behind me so I don't have to see the rainbow building where I gave my first ever speech

The same building where I met Karen the fist time

The same building where we raised money together the first time

The same building that covered us from prying eyes when you parked your Subaru around the back and kissed me in the backseat

How in the fuck am I supposed to feel now?

I feel trapped

I feel stuck

I feel like I'm going to feel like this forever

Its been ten fucking years and I still feel like the scared 18 year old kid

With no sense of direction

No future

Crushed hopes and dreams

And You

From what I understand

From the things I've leaned though mine and Karnes newly reunited friendship

Is that you've given up

You sound like a quitter

It sounds like you took the easy way out instead of the high road

You left non-profit work for a job at the federal reserve

You got married

Had a kid

Your a real mom now and not the fake pretend one you used to put on for me

I don't want to look at your life though a distorted lens and judge you

I don't want to be the bad guy

But its so hard to picture you like that

Its hard to imagine you happy and living a fulling life while I'm just now starting to realize what the fuck happened

You fucking hurt me

And not just by leaving

But by taking the knife out of my back

Soothing and healing my wounds

Only to take that same knife and stab in me in the front

And the worse part is you could even look me in the eyes while you did it

You didn't even speak at that court hearing

You didn't even spare me a passing glance as I walked out of your life forever

Then you had the audacity to blame it all on me

Painting me the villain when things didn't go smoothly immediately afterwards

Like you hadn't already done enough damage

Like you hadn't already heard the life drain out of me on that fucking phone call

My girlfriend called you a predator

Anytime I bring you up in conversation I get shut down

She cries

She says its so hard to sit and watch me miss you when everything I've described about our relationship to her sounds like abuse

She says you groomed me

I've done nothing but defend you

Denying it left and right

There was no way YOU did something like that

YOU?

You were my hero

The woman who saved my life twice

Killed me once

Who's kind words, lessons, and life advice brought me back and shaped the person I am today

I'd never believe something like that

But today I'm mad

Today I'm angry because I can't get though a single day without starring at your picture on my phone

I can't sleep at night because you haunt my dreams like a ghost

I can't get into bed with my girlfriend unless the room is pitch black

Because I can't bare to see her body wrapped around your name

And that's more ironic than you'll ever know

Because for me to be in any type of mood to meet her needs I have to have very specific conditions

Conditions that to others may seem a little odd but mostly normal

But for me are symbols and an attempted revision of the past

She doesn't know

And if I do end up marrying her it's something I'll probably take to my grave

But if you saw

You'd know exactly what I've been doing

It brings me shame

Its embarrassing to not be able to be intimae with someone I love unless I put her in a costume and close my eyes

I can't do this anymore

I can't keep playing this game and pretend I'm fine

I'm so fucking mad

And so fucking jealous

So jealous I can't tell if its jealously for your new life

Or for the child you are raising and knowing that they are living the childhood of my dreams and most likely will go on to lead a brighter, happier, bigger life than I could ever hope too

I hope you are actually happy and not secretly miserable like me

But I do hope that every once in a while I haunt you too

I hope you know that you hurt me

And I hope that guilt will eat at you until the day you die

I hope you struggle still too

I hope I find my closure and you never get yours

It's the only thing that seems fair

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