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astoryisaloveaffair · 1 year

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Fix You - Chapter 14: Enjoy the Silence

Gif by @hunterschafer

Pairing: Frankie “Catfish” Morales x Fem!Reader

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Read on A03

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Chapter Summary: The final heat...

Word Count: 7k

Rating: R

Chapter Warnings: Cussing, violence. I will not be warning anything else due to spoiling the story. We are all grown. You can stop reading when you want to.

A/N: Has it really been a year? I wish I had a better excuse than "I haven't been doing great." But that's what it is. I've had huge changes in my life. New job, new career, new goals, and a greater sense of self-worth. I'm feeling a lot better. But my new schedule is busy! Hopefully you can forgive me for such a long cliffhanger.

Finally, a heads up. This has been the arc I have been working towards for almost two years, and I'm not going to waver. Just stick with me like you have been. It’ll be worth it.

I also did the absolute most and made a specific playlist just for this chapter here.

Forever thank you to everyone who commented, reblogged, shared, boosted, made content for, and supported me. It meant a lot and definitely kept this fic in the back of my mind. As always, most love to my girl @musings-of-a-rose who has tolerated me being a shitty friend for a whole ass year, and always talking things through with me in life and in this fic. Cheers.

Suggested Songs: Depeche Mode "Enjoy the Silence", Fitz and the Tantrums: "Out of My League", Lizzo "Truth Hurts", Michael Kiwanuka "Cold Little Heart", Cigarettes After Sex "Cry", Guster "Demons"

Frankie and you decided to break your apartment lease starting October 1st. Fall term started on the 30th of August, and you wanted time to settle into your schedule before planning a move. You spent almost all your time at his house anyway, only stopping back at your apartment for more clothes. Frankie had already given you a row of drawers to keep your things in.

You’d honestly never been happier, both on cloud 9 and it never faded, you were incredibly excited to begin this new start with Frankie and Gabi. It all seemed to have happened so fast. It had only been five months, you hadn’t even told your family about him yet, mostly to avoid comments on the age gap.

You were relieved the hiccup in your relationship settled, you didn’t like feeling unsure or that someone resented you. When you started feeling secure again, you clung to it. That sparkle of joy was hard to keep in check.

You picked your Fall schedule out together and spent the remaining weeks of summer basking in your relationship, playing with Gabi, going out with the guys, and constant fucking. But your most favorite thing was still lying on the couch with Frankie, teasing each other and watching bad TV.

“This is simultaneously the best and worst movie I have ever seen in my life. I don’t understand how they achieved this.”

Frankie shrugs, reaching to your lap for the giant bowl of popcorn, his eyes still glazed to the TV where Mad Max: Fury Road is playing. “I dunno. Who cares? It’s cars and chaos!”

“And Tom Hardy. And Charlize Theron.”

He pinches you on the waist, acting threatened by your thirst just to tease you. “You ever been to a demo derby? This kind of reminds me of it.”

You sit up from where your back is resting against his chest. “Um, no? Isn’t that kind of…for rednecks?”

He laughs, his eyes crinkling. “I’m not sure if you noticed, but Benny and Will are rednecks. But no, it’s for anyone who likes cars crashing into each other. There’s actually one at the fair every year. We always go to it. You should come.”

“I’m not going to a demo derby.”

“Aw come on! It’ll be fun! First time for Gabi too, and there’s rides and games and funnel cake and fried oreos—” He pauses as you hold your hand up to silence him.

“I’ll go. You had me at ‘funnel cake.’”

The fair is packed. The final hurrah of the summer before kids return to school and university students dive back into their studies. The derby started at 8 PM sharp, you, Dali, and the boys got there plenty early to look around a bit, get some food, and find seats.

You forgo any typical entree and go right for the funnel cake, heaping fruit and extra powdered sugar on it until the plate is a big mound of sweet. The guys had talked you up on this for days, Benny wouldn’t shut up about it, and you found yourself excited to watch. Your legs bounce impatiently as you scarf down your cake, breaking off pieces here and there to feed to Gabi and your boys.

The seats were bleachers, hard metal planks that hurt your butt and back and caught vibration from every footfall, but Pope sat behind you so you could lean back against his legs to be more comfortable.

It’s a long wait. The bleachers eventually fill up, you certainly had the best seat in the house (thank you Will), and you could see the hoods up of participating cars behind the commentator podium. The air is musty, the odor of wet dirt from a quick August shower earlier that day.

When the first round of vehicles start revving their engines, Frankie pulls some earphones for Gabi and secures it to her head. Once he’s sure she’s comfortable, he quickly runs you through the basic rules. “So there’s several ‘heats’, and which heat you’re in is based on how many cylinders the car has. Last car moving is the winner, but you can’t just avoid the other cars the whole time. No continuing if your car starts sparking from the engine, no hitting the driver side door, and no hitting anyone who’s already out.”

“Wait, cars catch on fire in this?”

Before Frankie can answer, the announcer calls out the first heat and you almost choke at the state of the cars coming out. They were completely dilapidated, windows punched out and hood frames reinforced with extra steel. It looked like each entry had about 5 different parts all from different cars, horrendous paint jobs, and one of them even had a stuffed dinosaur duct taped to the hood. Some of them looked like they had already been hit by cars, parts hanging off and bumpers pressing in on itself. None of these cars would last at all. There’s no way...

The rink was surrounded by giant cement cinder blocks creating a large “rink” type area. The contestants lined the front bumpers of their vehicles up parallel to each other at the barricades separating the cars from the bleachers, alternately revving their engines during the countdown.

“Okay, so, usually we all pick the car we think is going to win.” Benny says. You lean forward to look over the assortment of jacked up cars for this heat, eventually settling on an old Toyota Corolla painted a matte black. Benny chooses the dino car, Will chooses a Dodge Stealth with it’s headlights hanging outside the socket, Dali and Pope argue over a Ford Taurus whose back end was already smashed into the back seats, and Frankie chooses a Chevy Impala, which you immediately regret not taking because it has such a long front and back end. Lots of room for smashing and being able to keep going.

Gabi jumps up and down on Frankie’s lap as he points out things to her over the sounds of engines and a countdown, and then the cars are off off, engines roaring and dirt kicking up as they all reverse at full speed, several of them crunching up in the middle while others circle around the perimeters.

It soon becomes clear to you that there is no rhyme or reason to which car makes it and which doesn’t. Pope’s Taurus didn’t even start and is eliminated after 2 minutes of no movement, and whoever is driving the boxy piece of shit Honda Accord that Dali had to select is a fucking maniac, winding and weaving at full speed backwards, hitting whoever gets in their way. Her choice is the winner of that heat.

Most of them are driving backwards, and Will tells you it’s because they are trying to protect the engine. You deflate in your seat a little in disappointment, but he assures you that as the heat winds down and there's fewer cars taking up the space, the drivers and announcer will get impatient and they will hit each other head to head.

You’re shocked at how much you enjoy it. At one point a car hits the passenger side door of another so hard that it is pushed up and onto the barricade wall from the inertia, hanging from an angle as the crowd jeers and shrieks in excitement. One car flips over completely, another’s engine bursts into flames and the crowd all starts crying out caution because the announcer can’t see it. You’ve never seen anything like it before and there was so much fire you were sure the whole thing would blow up, but the driver slid out the glassless driver’s side window like it was no big deal and walked it off.

There is something satisfying about two cars hitting each other at full speed, the bodies of them crunching, wheels hanging off axles, bumpers being dragged behind and run over by other drivers, cars with mangled pieces becoming stuck to each other so they can’t separate until another car hits them, tires completely gone and cars only moving on its hubs. It’s chaos in a safe format, a way to experience destruction and violence in a way that feels good and unharmful.

Gabi has never been so amazed in her entire life, her mouth hangs open and she wriggles against her dad to see everything, laughing every time a collision happens. The audience oohs and ahhs and boos and screams and cheers and teases, you and your friends join the clamor as you have your own mini competition with yourselves.

Giant fork tractors come into the arena area to lift the cars that can’t move anymore, some guys are able to get theirs back up and running, driving them to the sides to shape up for the final Battle Royale.

The final heat is fucking wild. All the cars that were already battered enough before they even began to come back out, returned to do another round for the final winner. With all the action you’d barely even noticed that contestants whose cars were still driveable had spent the remaining heats beyond the barricades hammering and reforming their vehicles enough to compete again.

And at the end, the winner of all faces the crowd, pulls off their helmet to reveal a thick curly mass of long hair. The winner is a woman. You and Dali cheer until your throats hurt.

It’s over too soon. There’s a mass exodus the instant the derby is over, the packed stadium standing and pouring down the stairs pressing so tight that you and your boys decide to hang back until it thins out. You lead the way, Frankie’s large and warm hand grazing your waist as you slowly move down the stairs and back out into the fair, turning to wait for the rest of your friends to make it out.

“What next?” Benny says when you are all reunited. “More food? Games? Rides?”

“I’m not eating more before getting on rides, let's do those now.” Says Frankie, grumbling as he hears you tease him with Benny. He whips his head around to glare at you. “Just you wait until you get older and start getting sick on rides, I cannot wait to make fun of you back.”

The wait for the ride tickets is long, but it leaves plenty of time for the group to decide how many are needed. Who is riding what, who isn’t, what pairings and who will watch Gabi on the rides she can’t do. You’re surprised when Will and Pope back out of the Zipper, leaving you and Benny as a pairing for that.

Riding it was a mistake. The ride is basically a giant airborne conveyer belt with completely enclosed containers for people hanging off it that were 360 degree capable. And it lasted FOREVER. You lose some of your funnel cake behind the ride out of sight, threatening violence on Benny if he outs you to the others.

But it didn’t stop you from riding The Freak Out immediately afterwards, a rotating pendulum swing that made you feel like you were going to be catapulted out of your seat. The ride seated 4 groups of 4 so that in between squeezing your eyes shut, you could catch watery glimpses of Benny red-faced and cackling hysterically, Will’s chants of “ohfuckohfuckohfuckOHfuckOHFUCKOHSHIT FUCCCCCCK!”, and Frankie looking…absolutely fine. It was almost disturbing really, he was calm and collected, the only hint that this might have been something other than a nice drive in his truck was his giant smile, the tears leaking from his squinted eyes, his chocolate curls whipping around in the breeze as his hands clutch his hat in his lap with a steel grip.

“How the fuck were you so calm?!” You gasp as you stumble off the rickety landing platform. You hadn’t moved yet you felt like you had run a mile, your heart was beating so fast from the adrenaline it almost felt like you might have a heart attack.

Frankie shrugs. “Feels like a copter in a bad air current.”

You simply stare blinking.

“No, he’s always like this. Like this one time, we were flying in a helo over the Andes mountains, and—”

A sharp stare from Frankie that he tries to hide from you makes Benny backpedal.

“Uhhh yea we were flying over some mountains and the air current was wild but we got over the mountains just fine and everything was fine and we were fine.”

Your heart seizes in your chest, that same feeling of not being told something creeping up. You hate it. You push it back down, swallowing heavily to center yourself. “So I assume you were fine.”

“Yea. Yea. Cat is a good pilot.”

You hum, the panic still not leaving your chest.

Frankie grabs your hand as you walk. “It happened a lot, I just got used to it.”

“It happened a lot?”

“Yea. I mean, sometimes we were flying through shit climates, sometimes even pursued. Doesn’t make for a smooth ride. I’m just used to it. They always scream bloody murder though.” Frankie smiles softly.

“Oh.”

You go silent, continuing to walk to the next destination: the scrambler. You had already established you would not ride and Dali wanted some funnel cake herself, so she heads off while you stay off to the side with Gabi to watch, lost in your own thoughts.

“Just don’t fucking talk about that, none of that. That never happened.” Frankie seethes to Benny as they are strapped into the ride.

“Sorry dude, I can’t read your thoughts. I figured she knew.”

“No. I don’t want her to know. No one else needs to know about it.”

Benny falls silent, looking to Will beside him. Pope lowers his head, choosing to say nothing.

“Catfish…you have to.” Says Will.

“No the fuck I don’t. I never want her to know. If she knows…she’ll actually see ‘real me’. ‘Fuck-up me.” And I don't want her to yet. I don’t want to lose her yet. I don’t want her to be afraid. Stop fucking looking at me like that.”

They stop. But only because the ride starts, and they can’t see anything other than blurs.

You hate this feeling, this fluttering in your stomach like something is wrong but your heart knows, it knows it’s fine. It has to be. Your mind is spinning, trying to combat the rising anxiety clenching in your chest, doing gymnastics to find reasons to not be alarmed.

He’s not lying about something. He’s not. …He promised….I’m just overthinking this…

You can’t. You refuse to even think about it. Confronting the terrible possibility that you might’ve done it again, you might have thrown yourself all in to someone only to—-no.

He’s not lying. He’s not. …He promised….he’s different. I’m just overthinking this…

You can feel butterflies bubbling in your stomach and you feel like you might throw up. Fucking men. You huff in frustration and try to distract yourself with your surroundings, watching people on rides, sharing funnel cake. Your eyes scan over two men staring at you silently by a skewered chicken cart and in your current mood it makes you furious. “What the fuck are you staring at?!” You growl at them. They say nothing and slowly walk away, disappearing into the crowd. Fucking. Men.

You try not to let your emotions show. You sit back while Gabi goes on some rides for her age, using the time to rehydrate and calm yourself down. Living through Gabi’s joy helps.. She’s having a blast, choosing a different person to pair with for each time ride. Pope in the Wacky House, the Helicopters with her dad, Benny on the mini Viking ship. Once you feel better you join in to play bumper cars (Will and Gabi win) and ride the high-rise swings with her seated in the cool metal chair next to you, Benny singing along to the ambient speakers playing “Out of My League” so loud eventually all the other teens on the ride join in.You enjoy the mini coaster more than you thought you would considering it’s for kids Gabi’s age, you and Dali are the only others who can fit in the seats, no matter how hard Benny tried. It was easy to quickly forget.

After the coaster, Gabi begins to slow down, so you hit the fried oreo stand, paying for several batches despite protestation and alternately feeding everyone as the group slowly walks through the agricultural parts of the fair. It’s calmer here, the air warm and quiet. The pathway is less crowded so Gabi is able to frolic around on the walkway in front of you safely.

You walk through every barn, stopping to pet every animal. She’s a natural with them. Completely fearless, not one flicker of apprehension as she approaches cows and horses that are easily 6 times her height, paying close attention to her dad in how to not spook them. Everyone finds the goats to be the favorite because of the sounds they make. Even more so when Frankie engages in a screaming contest back and forth with a bunch of them until someone shoos them out of the pavilion.

Soon, all the sugar Gabi consumed rears its ugly head in the rabbit barn, she throws a fit when Frankie won’t let her get a pet rabbit and you only just catch her upper arm in time to keep her from collapsing on the filthy barn floor. You’re surprised she held out so long. Even you were crashing and getting tired. Also, the rabbits were ridiculously cute.

“Listen Gabi, how about we ride the ferris wheel? Would you like that?” You kneel before her, swiping the tears off her cheeks as she catches her breath. “It goes really high! Higher than the swings!” She nods, sniffing in a snot bubble as she takes your hand. The two of you lead the way, and as you get closer and closer, you start to regret your decision.

It’s much taller than the Freak Out. By more than 100 feet. It doesn’t look very stable either.

“Wait...this…this looks kind of high, don’t you think?” You turn to the guys, trying to conceal the wavering in your voice. You were scared enough at 70 feet. This was more like 200.

“Height requirement says she’s fine. And it’s enclosed, goes really slow. Come on.” Frankie takes you by the hand and your heart leaps into your throat, your feet skidding across the lawn as you try to pull back.

A light shove pushes you forward and you turn to glare at Will as he smirks down at you. “If you don’t go I’m never going to let you hear the end of it. Not after you called us “old and broken down.”

Well shit.

“Fine.”

You’re shaking when it’s your turn, the group mad dashing to three cars next to each other so you could talk throughout. Benny pairs with Pope, Gabi is vibrating with excitement as she’s put into a carriage by Will and Dali, and Frankie is beaming as he motions you towards the left car. He pats your butt as you gingerly step in, waiting until you’re seated before joining you and taking your hand.

“Babe…are you okay?”

You swallow, grateful it’s dark enough he can’t see you trembling. “Yep. I’m good.”

He leans forward in his seat, the glowing phosphorescence of the lights of the ride and around the fair bathing him halfway in a multicolored glow. tThe colors and shadows fold into the angles of his face like rainbow chiaroscuro, an angular stained glass window. He takes your hand again, yours is swallowed in his palm and you close your eyes as he rubs his thumb across the top. The dark beat of Depeche Mode pounds against your chest and echoes in your ears and you briefly imagine this is what it must feel like to drop acid.

“Your hands are really sweaty…and you’re breathing really fast. Are you sure you’re okay? Hey…” He squeezes your palm and you open your eyes to meet his. “It’s okay if you’re scared. I won’t joke anymore about it, I’m sorry.”

You swallow. “It’s just really really high.”

Frankie watches the ride operator out of the corner of his eye passing their car as he makes sure everyone is safely locked in before tugging on your arm slightly. You slide forward minutely, he meets you more than halfway with his large limbs and rests his hands on your hips. You gasp as the ride jolts and begins rolling, lifting the cabs up in the air. His calloused fingertip pushes your head back up.

“How about I distract you.” He murmurs, shifting forward one inch more, tilting his neck as his soft pouty lips meet yours.

You close your eyes, trying to lose your self awareness into him and his mouth and the soft skin of his nose that bumps your cheek and tickles your nose with its little breaths.

The lift mechanism suddenly shudders, clunking over something and it feels like when you run over a squirrel in your car. You inhale sharply against Frankie’s lips as your cab jostles back and forth. Not much, but enough for you to slam yourself back against your seat and clutch the seat bottom as hard as you can. Your heart beats wildly and you imagine the ride breaking and dropping you on the ground to be crushed to death by this stupid fucking metal cab.

You feel pressure on your knees and look down, focusing hard to not see double from fear. Frankie cups both in his hands, thumbs lightly stroking the inside of your thighs. “It’s okay.” He reassures, squeezing your knees once more. “Probably an under-greased cog, it’s nothing. They test these things like 50 times a day.”

You simply stare, forcing yourself to nod.

“Close your eyes.”

You open your mouth to argue then close it and obey. You trust Frankie, and it can’t be any worse.

“Just focus on me. And…you hear the music? It’s called “Enjoy the Silence.” I was obsessed with this song when it came out. And can you hear Benny below us? I can hear Gabi laughing too. We’re all okay, you’re okay too.”

You bite your lips into your mouth, focusing on the song and Frankie’s husky voice. The meditative synth pop calms you, and the carefree voices of your friends below does help calm you, but you can’t slow down your heartbeat.

“I’m okay. Just too much adrenaline.”

The hands on your knees slide up your bare thighs and wrap around the bottoms of them. Frankie pulls you forward in your seat with a smirk. “I’m feeling a little amped up too.”

“Frankie.”

He doesn’t respond, his sole focus on your thighs as his hands slide up and up and up until he is just able to slip the tip of one of his fingers under one leg of your shorts. For some reason, it pisses you off.

“Frankie!” You hiss. “People could see us.”

“Nah…” He shushes you, his finger sliding lower.

You clamp your legs shut and push his hand back in his direction. “Frankie, I don’t want to right here.”

He sits up. “Oh.”

Suddenly you hear Benny’s voice from below. “Hello we are underneath you guys! I don’t want to hear any hooking up sounds!” He trolls, and you fully push Frankie back to his side, your cheeks burning in embarrassment.

It’s the first time you can remember that it’s ever been uncomfortably awkward between the two of you, and you’re not sure why. The silence seems so much more noticeable and weird against the clanking of the Ferris wheel gears and the chattering of random other people.

You’re not even looking at each other, you realize. When did that happen? Your neck cranes to the left as you gaze at the stars, and when you turn back towards Frankie, he is looking to the right and down at the fair.

“…Is everything okay?”

His eyes snap back to yours. “Yea? Why wouldn’t it be?”

“Cause I pushed you away, and…I dunno, you’re being weird..”

“Oh, I’m sorry, that’s not intentional. I’m not upset, c’mere.” He opens his arms wide to you, scooting on his bench so there’s enough room for you.

You hesitate. “Won’t it…won’t it throw off the balance?”

You feel ridiculous asking but he doesn’t laugh at you, just shakes his head slightly. “Nah, they wouldn’t be able to run this ride if people couldn’t sit on the same side.”

You balance awkwardly on the edge of your bench overanalyzing what exact moment during the track of the ride to launch onto his, but you overthink it and end up jostling the cab more than necessary. Frankie’s arms pull you into his side and you burrow your face in his neck as the cab continues to rock. The music fades from Depeche Mode to Lizzo to Lil’ Nas X (Will clearly enjoys that one) and then back to Lizzo, and you forget all about your uneasiness.

He was right. It did feel better being with him.

The ride does one more pass then rolls to a halt, letting off you with Frankie and Benny with Santiago. You hover at the exit for Will and Gabi, who have to wait for their cab to reach the platform before dismounting. Frankie takes your hand as you wait.

Gabby’s adrenaline rush runs out fast, and you spend the remainder of the fair eating more fried Oreos and playing games. Somehow you manage to beat them all at the water shooting game, which amps up the competitiveness to the point you’d rather just watch.

Which is how you end up at the “star” game.

“We’re so fucking good at this game, it pisses them off every time.” Laughs Benny, as he shoots the entire Star out perfectly with the gun that is specifically not given enough ammo to achieve this. You hop up on the far side of the counter to watch, noting the way each of you boys handles their weapon and the differences in each. Benny held his gun loosely, like he was relaxed and self assured. It almost seemed like you would be able to slap it out of his hands but you knew he still had an iron grip. Will was precise and, as you expected, “perfect form”. You could tell just from Pope’s posture change that he was the best shot on the team, you’d never seen him look so focused. Frankie held his with a tense white knuckle grip, the folding stock tucked against his shoulder joint. The tension carrying up his arms as his veins popped out in his forearms and biceps. He looked fucking good. And you wouldn’t consider yourself a “gun person.” In fact, you kind of hated them. But there just was something about a strong non-douchey man holding a rifle like that that activated you. Damn the patriarchy. Even Dali is a great shot, though not as good as the guys.

After a few rounds, the carnie finally stopped allowing your posse to keep playing, frustrated that somehow the rigging system didn’t work on your group. You lean back on your hands, your legs swinging against the wood counter, observing Benny arguing with the carnie with a smirk. Gabi is passed out in her stroller next to you as Frankie sidles up to you, feeding you a piece of Fried Reeses, then promptly kissing you so the taste floats between you.

He hums deeply, stepping closer to you til he’s between your legs. His hands rest low on the top of your thighs. “This ok?”

You smile. “Yes. More than okay. And I want more.”

Frankie beams and cups your face, his lips crashing into yours as he all but breathes you in. You tilt your head and poke his mouth with your tongue. He responds immediately and opens for you, meeting you halfway. You whine softly as his hands leave your cheeks and trail down your back, one hand sneaking a bit lower to discreetly cup your ass. You’ve just wound your legs around his hips and your arms around his neck when you hear a shrill voice cut through the din of the dwindling crowd.

“Are you fucking kidding me?”

Your heart slams to a halt so fast it hurts. You recognize that voice. And so does Frankie. Your heads both snap to the left as a disheveled looking Lex stands there with a bunch of her friends.

Frankie simply stares. She repeats herself. “Are. You. Fucking. Kidding. Me. The BABYSITTER? Are you fucking your BABYSITTER??? Oh Frankie…come on…how pathetic can you be? She’s like a child!”

You look at Frankie, receding into himself like a silent, terrified puppy. You’ve never seen him like this before, it unnerves you.

“Excuse me.” You snap back. “I am 28.”

She scoffs. I fucking knew something was going on with you two. And you’re doing this in front of my child?”

“Well, actually, Gabi is sleeping. At least she was, until you came ranting and raving.” You make eye contact with Pope, who reads your perfectly and starts steering Gabi’s stroller away so she can’t hear. “We made sure to be careful for her but why do you even care if we are fucking? You left him! You didn’t want him anymore, so it shouldn’t fucking matter who he dates.”

“He’s a drug addict and a pathological liar. He will NEVER change.”

“Yea? And you are a drunk, controlling, OCD bitch who can’t mind her own fucking business. He’s happy with me. I trust him. Unlike you. Bye.” You couldn’t help yourself, you just fucking hated her.

But that set her off. “Did he tell you why he was suspended?”

“Yes, he—“

“Did he tell you he was high, flying a family and he almost injured everyone from a sloppy landing? Did he tell you how he would take Gabi to his drug dealers house with him? How he went on a STUPID fucking mission with these idiots to burglarize a fucking drug lord completely off paper? That I deliberately asked him not to because we had a new baby? That he crashed their helicopter, dropped all their money and shot innocent villagers to keep them from getting it? At children and old men adn women? That because of that, Molly’s husband was shot in the fucking head by one of those people? And then they couldn’t even bring the money back so it was all for no reason?”

She’s shouting now, spittle flying from her inebriated lips. One of her friends tries to grab her arm but she shakes them off. People in the crowd are starting to stop and watch. “Then, THEN, he treated me like shit, saying horrible things to me just when he was mad, throwing things, scaring me!”

You feel like you can’t breathe, it’s too much information all at once. “...What? I don’t…No. no, he said he was on a delta mission–”

“Oh sweetheart,” She sneers condescendingly. “He was on a greed mission. He was retired from delta. This was like a year ago. They all wanted to get rich and robbed a fucking drug kingpin and Frankie shot innocent people to make sure he got alllllll that money. And because of that, his friend was shot and killed and his family has NO idea why. He lied to you.”

You turn to look at him, and all his friends. Everyone is silent, trying not to look up from the ground. Dali looks as bewildered as you. “Frankie…?” Tears water in your eyes and you feel like your heart is going to burst. You thought he told you it was an enlisted mission, but on top of everything else you just learned your thoughts are rushing so fast you can’t seem to remember specifics.

Frankie can’t even look at you. And that’s how you know.

It’s true…

“Lex. Stop.” Will’s Southern drawl cuts through the silence, the commanding officer in him coming out. “It’s over. This shit between you two has to stop. Enough.” His eyes shift to Lex’s friends, who are nodding and repeating the same thing. Lex finally allows them to pull her away muttering under her breath, sending one last glare in your direction.

The walk to the truck is silent. The ride home is a foggy blur. But the minute you step into the house, you crack.

“Frankie please tell me all this is not true.” You can’t read him at all, his face is completely blank as he moves around you towards Gabi’s bedroom to tuck her in.

So you wait.

His hackles are already up when he comes back out.

“Frankie–”

“Yea.”

“Well?”

“Yea. It’s true. We tried to steal money from one of Pope’s cases and it backfired and Tom got shot.”

“Because of you.”

His expression changes then, from blank nothing to vicious defensive anger. “Yea. Because of me. I fucked up the flight back and we crash landed and these fuckin’ villagers were gonna take the money! And it was an accident!”

“You ‘accidentally’ shot innocent people?”

He swallows, his jaw clenching and unclenching. You can see he’s doing mental gymnastics in order to avoid accountability.

“Did your finger slip?”

No answer.

“Frankie. Did your finger slip on the trigger?”

You already know the answer before he says it. And somehow it’s like he morphs into a Disney villain as he says it. “No. My finger didn’t slip.”

It burns, the sharp pain in your heart that makes you feel like it’s having a seizure or forgot how to pump blood or is pumping too much blood. “How many people did you kill.”

He shrugs. “I dunno.”

“You don’t know? How can you not know?! Frankie, you told me this was your job! You- you fucking lied to me! I-I I asked you if you were hiding anything else from me and you fucking lied to me!” You can’t help your voice raising, the tears spilling out of your eyes as you realize how fucking stupid you had been. Somewhere in the background you can hear Gabi has woken and is hysterically crying. Frankie, clearly having enough, turns back towards her room. But you continue, screaming at his back. “And that’s why Tom is dead? And his family doesn’t know why?!”

Frankie doesn’t answer and suddenly you are enraged. You run behind him and shove him forward. “I’m fucking talking to you! How can you just be so fucking blase about this??? And…all that other shit???—I feel like I don’t know you at all!”

He whirls around, that furious murderous face you ‘ve seen him give others is finally directed at you. “Because you don’t!” He screams back, his teeth nash and he shoves a finger one inch from your face. You flinch.

“Frankie, you’re scaring me.”

“I’m scaring you? Really? I thought this was your thing?”

You blink, confused, tears stalling on your face. “Don’t–” You plead softly.

“No, Lex is right. You’re a naive little girl who thinks she can save worthless idiots like me and live some fucking fantasy happily ever after. You won’t. You can’t. I’m unfixable.”

“How can you say that!! Frankie, I love you!

He scoffs. “I know you think you do. And I know you aren’t stupid, you told me you’ve done this before. But guess what sweetie, you aren’t better, you’re still doing it because you’re so fucking desperate for someone to love you. You don’t love me. You just want to feel like some fucking savior.”

“No! No… I didn’t, I don’t…you told me you loved me!”

“I wanted to fuck you.” His eyes are black as far, it’s like you don’t even recognize his face anymore. Lex was right. Lex was right. How…did you make all of it up in your head?

“You…You’re a fucking psycho…I feel like you emotionally manipulated me into caring for you only for you to play games with me! I specifically told you I couldn’t go through this again and you fucking did it anyway!”

“Hey, you kissed me. And you were fun to fuck, I will admit that. Let me do fucking anything. But we both knew this would happen. You set yourself up. I did shoot those villagers. I caused Tom’s death. I just wanted the fucking money. And I wanted to kill a bunch of kids too, when they got in my way. Fuckin’ teenagers and I told Pope to fucking shoot them all. And you know what else? We went back and got all that fucking money we hid, and we are fucking swimming in it. And I didn’t share a goddamn dime with my ex. You’re right. I am a psycho, so it’s a good thing this is over. Pack your shit and leave me alone.”

“Fuck you Frankie.”

You don’t wait another moment. You don’t need to be asked twice this time. You shove him aside on your way down the hallway, doing everything you can not to let the second round of tears fall. He’d seen enough.

You slam the door of the master bedroom behind you, frantically bouncing around different points in the room to grab all your shit. When did all of this stuff even get here? Anxiety bubbles up your chest until you can’t take it anymore and say fuck it, he can just throw anything else out. I have to get out of here.

You rush back down the hallway like a speed demon, praying to whatever that he won’t be standing in the hallway still. He isn’t. He’s sitting on his couch facing away from you, his head in his hands. You hate yourself for wanting to go comfort him. He’s right…I’m

not better…

You pause on the front doorway, struggling to say what needs to be said. Don’t be weak. Don’t keep letting people do this to you over and over. “Don’t contact me.I never want to see you again.” You say to his back.

He doesn’t move a muscle, or even look at you. “You won’t.”

You were able to make it halfway across the lawn before the grief fully hit. By the time you got to your car you were gasping like you were no longer able to breathe. And the minute your car door shut you broke, a wailing sob bursting from your lips as you bury your face in your palms.

Again. It happened again. And it’s just as crushing as every other time, except now it feels like you never healed from the others and now they are all piling on top of the other with this one as the final blow.

Why. WHY? Was there something wrong with you? Why were you never enough? Why couldn’t you make them stay? What did you do to keep having to go through this? It almost killed you last time, your eyes squeeze shut as you remember the look on your parents face as they watched you writhe on your bed screaming and crying hysterically from your latest breakup.

And why did you let yourself fall into it again, like you had never learned a goddamn thing. It was like you were masochistic, you told yourself you would never need someone again so badly, you wouldn’t enmesh yourself so fully that when it fell apart you could barely function. Your heart was once again ripped out of your chest and thrown to the floor, the cracks from before making this shattering into pieces so small you know it can’t get repaired again.

With a trembling whimper, you pull your face out of your hands and wipe your eyes, your nose. You realize you’re still sitting in Frankie’s driveway and you immediately look to see if he's at the window, concerned for you. He isn’t. You hate yourself for it but it breaks you even more.

It’s over.

You drive home mindlessly, your Spotify on shuffle and you aren’t aware of anything else. Just get home. Just get home and then you can cry, try to move on. But you already know you won’t.

You finally tire yourself out of tears, and you try to talk yourself up, turning up the music and chanting “it’s okay” to yourself.

It’s Coldplay. You always liked Coldplay.

When you're too in love to let it go

But if you never try, you'll never know

Just what you're worth

Lights will guide you home

And ignite your bones

And I will try to fix you…

Tears stream down your face

When you lose something you cannot replace

Tears stream down your face, and I–

You slam the on/off button so hard you actually cause the auxiliary cord to malfunction, so you rip it out of your phone and throw the damn thing on the passenger seat. You drive home in silence.

It’s dark in the lot when you arrive. You park in a spot along the side and towards the back because the lot is mostly full. The only light shining is the pole yards away, the bulb switches off and on opposite of the dark one right above you.

You feel numb. You can still feel sticky dried tears on your face, but your ability to utter a sound is gone. You close your eyes and try to compose yourself, simply sitting in your car in the dark. You’re avoiding going upstairs, you know. You’ve pretty much been living at Frankie’s. Walking through that door would make it feel too ‘official’. You cover your face with your hands and rub the tears tracks off your raw face, and are about to take a breath and gather your shit when a THWACKING sound bursts right in your left ear.

You startle with a yelp and look out your window, prepared to tell off whoever is messing with you, but freeze when you find yourself face to face with the barrel of a gun, the only thing separating you from it is the shitty window glass on your cheap car.

»»———————►

Post A/N: Don't yell at me lol

#fix you fic #frankie morales x you #frankie morales x reader #frankie morales x fem!reader #pedro pascal x you #pedro pascal x reader #pedro pascal characters #pedro pascal character fanfiction #pedro pascal x fem!reader #triple frontier fanfic

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springbloggy · 8 months

Text

Kris: A horrifying theory that literally came to me in a dream

Ever read and watch so many Deltarune theories it comes to you subconsciously? This was the subject of my last 2 dreams. Now it coming to me in a dream is kinda silly, but the evidence? It's scarily convincing.

In modern cultures, Zombies are undead people that rise from the grave. Typically Zombies in modern stories are caused by viruses that spread to other people, usually through bites. Zombies are mindless, stumbling around to place to place, only becoming powerful and strong when "on the hunt".

Besides stumbling about, Kris doesn't match any of this. However, this is the traditional idea of zombies, the origins of the zombie myth is where things become a whole lot more interesting. Zombies were originally created by Haiti folklore, as dead people revived by necromancy, usually done via a bokor, the Haitian counterpart to a witch or sorcerer. Zombies are then placed as the Bokor's personal slave, having no free will of their own. There was also a spiritual variation, where a zombie astral, aka a zombie soul, could be used to enhance the bokor's spiritual powers. The zombie astral could also be sealed in a bottle to be sold to bring luck, healing, or business success. Each type of zombie, the flesh and blood, and the spiritual kind, are missing one half of their soul from the original whole person it came from.

Now ok, what does any of these have to do with Kris? Well this is where things become weird, scary, and unconventional to the typical theory.

Kris died

To understand this, lets look into what we currently know about Kris' backstory. Kris was a trouble making kid, often pulling pranks. But they weren't mean spirited about it and made close friends with the Holiday family specifically. One day, something traumatic happened to Kris and the Holidays that tore the two families apart. This is hinted to be the disappearance of Dess, the older sibling of Noelle and the daughter of the mayor. There is also a bunker in the woods that Kris is traumatized by. This bunker is implied to be one of the last areas where Kris, Dess, Noelle, and Asriel played in before Dess' ultimate disappearance.

But then, years later, Kris and Susie fall in a dark world. Judging by how scared Kris seemed during the fall into the first dark world, I don't think this is Kris' first venture into one at all. Not only that, but I think dark worlds is what caused Kris' trauma.

So lets set the stage: Kris & co. go into the bunker on a dare, perhaps by Kris and fall into a dark world. Noelle, scared, stressed, and confused pulls snowgrave. Now most theories I see go into this route have her pulling it on Dess, who is trying to calm down Noelle. This I always found unconvincing, especially as more and more signs of Dess being trapped in the games code come out. But if Noelle pulls snowgrave on Kris, suddenly things make more sense for what happens later on in the game. Now the scary voice coming from Kris commanding Noelle to do the snowgrave spell is a lot more sinister if this is the same spell that caused Kris' death.

Anyways Kris, ya know, dies from this and everyone is heartbroken and Dess, being as headstrong as she is, runs off into the dark world to find the solution. Becoming lost in the process.

In comes Gaster, Gaster takes in the player's soul and one half of Kris' soul and fuses it together, placing it inside of Kris. Kris becomes an undead being. They are not the same as they once were and is now under the player's total control for most of the time. For the other characters looking in, Kris only had a near-death experience, but Kris knows the truth.

Kris, Noelle, and Asriel run out of the bunker dark world without Dess. This sparks the investigation by the mayor to find her missing daughter, Asgore can't find Dess, gets fired, etc. Then Deltarune begins.

So now you're wondering, what happened to Kris' other soul half? Well..

Ralsei is Kris' other soul-half

Many theories of Ralsei I found kinda unconvincing. If Ralsei is Asriel's dust, then why is there so much about Asriel returning home. If Ralsei is a titan, why is he so neatly connected to Asriel? It just leaves too much blanks. One of the most popular theories is that Ralsei is Kris' monstersona brought to life. For context, Ralsei has pink horns, while Kris used to wear a pink horned headband growing up to fit in monster society. This makes a lot of sense, but also leaves so many blanks to some of Ralsei's more suspicious moments.

But I think zombie Kris theory is right, then suddenly this makes a lot more sense, but now Ralsei is a much more creepy character.

One of the things that make up the zombie myth is how the soul is split into two: the body soul, which performs bodily functions, and the free soul, which is the person's true self and can leave the body and wander to the afterlife. I believe that Kris only has one half of their free soul and the other half, the player, makes up for their body soul. The other half of Kris' free soul makes up Ralsei, a personification of the monster that Kris wanted to be growing up. Ralsei has all the childhood innocence Kris used to have before becoming traumatized by the bunker, but also has no sense of self due to his incomplete soul. But I think he is well aware that Kris has the other half of the soul and the two are planning to fuse it back together.

This sentence always appears when the player is focused away from Kris and Ralsei. But why? Its a mystery that has stumped many. But if I am right, now it makes sense. Have the player gone away so they don't find out that Kris and Ralsei are planning to get rid of the player's soul in order to fuse their own, so Kris can be a whole person again.

There's also the theory about Ralsei being "attracted" to the player's soul, however I think it could be the other way around. Ralsei isn't attracted to the player's soul, he's attracted to Kris' soul half.

The title screen

This comes from @mirror-ralsei's title screen theory.

youtube

The title screen adds to the overall theme of multiplication and division in Deltarune:

The SOUL, and all the other parts of the logo, appear to be divided again and again, gradually fading with each division until there's nothing left of them. -mirror-ralsei

The title screen could foreshadow the ending...but it could also foreshadow what happened to Kris.

Kris dies.

Through some miracle, Gaster finds Kris' soul, but it is damaged beyond belief.

Gaster fuses half of Kris' soul, the half that makes up Kris' "true self" with the player's soul.

The other half divides off to become Ralsei

The twinkling snowgrave sound effect at the end is an indicator to what happened to Kris. They died due to the snowgrave spell.

Flowey

Deltarune plays with inversions and subversions of Undertale a lot. The most obvious one being the theme of each game. Deltarune, your choices don't matter, Undertale you must stay determined to make the right choices.

Kris is the Flowey inversion. Flowey is a soulless flower given life with Asriel's dust and the souls of fallen children. Kris is a dead human injected with half of their own soul and the soul of the player.

Mother time!

The mother series is Undertale and Deltarune's greatest inspiration. Many of the games themes and ideas stem from their.

Undertale is a combination of Mother 1 and 2, the most apparent of this combination is through the final boss of most routes: Flowey/Asriel.

Asriel is similar in many ways to Giegue from mother 1. Both are the children of their race (alien for Giegue, monster for Asriel). Both had to make a tough decision regarding humans. Giegue had to decide to pull war against humanity, even though he was raised by human parents, Asriel had to carry Chara to the humans while they were dying. Both grow up to have a negative worldview and become spiritually monstrous. Giegue becomes the terrifying Giygas while Asriel becomes Flowey, and in the neutral route, becomes the terrifying Photoshop Flowey. Both are ultimately defeated by the positivity of the main characters. Giegue gets defeated by the children singing his mother's lullaby. Giygas gets defeated by the collective prayers of all the characters Ness meets. Asriel gets defeated by sparing him.

This is where things get sad. If Undertale is Mother 1 and 2, than Deltarune is the darker Mother 3. Mother 3 is about Lucas on a race to pull the needles that wake up the dark dragon before the masked man does. If someone with a good heart, like Lucas pulls the needles, the dragon will wake up and recreate the world with no hesitation. But if someone with an evil heart pulls the needles, then the world will be destroyed for good.

It is revealed that the Masked Man is actually Lucas' dead brother Claus, rebuilt as a cyborg by the pigmask army. Claus lacks a heart and all of his memories are gone for the majority of the game. Only until the end, does he get reminded of them, and ultimately Claus ends up ending his own life.

There's a lot of similarities to Mother 3 already in Deltarune, the fountains play a similar role to the needles. When created, they will create a dark world, and if enough are done, it could end the world. There's many theories of the world of Deltarune being in a timeloop or being reset in some way, which could be similar to Lucas' good heart rebuilding the world, thus starting the world "over again".

However, this is where the Masked Man parallel lies. Many people already noticed the similarities to Mother 3 and Deltarune and predict that our "masked man" would be the knight or even Dess. However, under this theory, I think that the game will pull a surprise inversion.

If Kris is really undead and is the Flowey inversion, then Kris will turn out to be the game's Masked Man. The true protagonist of the game isn't Kris, but the knight all along, or some other character like Susie, Noelle, etc.

This will provide a tragic ending, if Toby really does go "all in" with the Masked Man parallels with Kris like I am theorizing, than the end of the game will end with Kris' death. Perhaps, if I am right with Ralsei hosting the other half of their soul, having it fuse for one final time while Asriel watches his sibling die. It's a tragic ending to a tragic game.

I'm not an undertale or deltarune lore expert, so feel free to debunk or expand or what have you on these ideas. I personally find them scarily plausible, but understand why it doesn't seem that way for others. I just hope this provides a somewhat entertaining read, despite how sad it is of a theory.

#deltarune #deltarune theory #undertale #undertale theory #utdr theory #utdr #mother spoilers #Youtube #springy thoughts

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princessxsstuff · 1 year

Note

Hi! I'm new to your blog so, apologies if this is something you're not comfortable with. I'm curious, who do you think would have a breeding kink? And/or just the members' thoughts on breeding in general 💕

Ofc! And Welcome to my blog <33! (Btw this is soooo late I apologize I’ve been busy!)

(I did both for ya fren!) (these r not my gifs btw)

MEMBERS WHO WOULD HAVE A BREEDING KINK:

•Minho

•Chan

•Hyunjin

•Felix

MEMBERS THOUGHTS ON BREEDING

Chan:

He was up for it as long as you were. He didn’t really like the way the condom felt anyways. He was ready to be a father, and also ready to cum inside of you. He normally used protection, but sometimes his kink gets the best of him and he ends up asking you to let him take of the condom. You let him because you were on birth control and it was nice feeling his actual dick inside of you.

Minho:

He LOVED breeding. He barely ever used a condom unless you asked him too. He didn’t like the way the condom felt either. It worried you that one day you’d find out that you’re pregnant even though you’re on birth control. Minho was proud to have a breeding kink. He told EVERYONE that. They would just look at him then look at you. It was quite embarrassing but, you loved him so it didn’t matter.

Changbin:

He wasn’t a huge fan of it. It triggered his anxiety. He told you, “I’m not ready to be a dad just yet, and even though you’re on birth control, you never know what could happen.” That’s why you never asked him to breed you. Although, one time he did. He admitted unprotected sex was better than protected but he was still too scared so you both just stuck to, “rather be safe than sorry.”

Hyunjin:

Hyunjin liked risks, and breeding you was one. He knew that he could get you pregnant, but you were on birth control so was expected nothing to happen. You both liked it to be honest. Feeling Hyunjin’s hard cock in you made you cum with or without a condom, but unprotected sex was better for both of you. Hyunjin liked it too. He loved breeding you. He has a lot of kinks but this one was his strongest. But he has to control it or else he’ll end up being a father.

Han:

He was absolutely terrified of breeding. He knew it was apart of life and dreamed to do it someday with you. But he also knew if he ended up with a kid right now, he couldn’t continue being an idol. How would he go on tour if he needed to be they’re for his baby? Or how would he get to see his kid grow up if he was constantly away? Han wanted to wait on this whole “breeding” thing and just kept on giving and receiving pleasure with a condom.

Felix:

It was most definitely something you both liked. When he did breed you, he never seemed nervous about it. But deep down inside, he was. He understood the fact that he could get you pregnant, but on the other hand giving you pleasure and seeing you cum made him weak. So he just had to deal with it. You seeing his head thrown back moans leaving his mouth each thrust made you hornier. So you both deeply liked it. It’s way better than protected sex.

Seungmin:

Absolutely hated it. He needed to wear a condom when he had sex with you because if he became a father he wouldn’t know what to do. It’s a bad time right time for him to have children, but he’d most definitely get you pregnant one day. He didn’t use a condom once just to see how it was. He got some orgasm in but he was so scared that he couldn’t relax.

Jeongin:

He really wanted to do what ever made you happy and comfortable, but if he did end up becoming a father, it would mess up his life. He would get canceled for having children at “sUcH a YoUnG aGe” and because he had girlfriend. He liked breeding you because birth control was his best friend. However, he HATED condoms. He complains how tight and annoying they are. In conclusion; YANG JEONGIN LIKES BREEDING.

Lol this is so bad istg I’m sorry for being inactive and dry. Merry Christmas and PLS FORGIVE ME😭🫶

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11x13kyle · 1 year

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stylegate

stan and kyle have been together for what at this point is probably like 2500000 years, but their relationship was pretty private because stan was in the closet for a while

when stan comes out, it’s another 4-6 months before his relationship with kyle is made public (passive voice because it was NOT by choice)

there’s a lot of relationship speculation, but kyle is really NOT one of the people that is suspected, aside from a couple of reddit posts with like 2 upvotes that say shit like “my money’s on kyle from fireside chats pod”

most of the replies to this are like “dude what the fuck are you talking about. just because they’re from the same place and the same age like next you’re gonna say craig tucker is the secret boyfriend. get real.”

there are anon submissions on deuxmoi about stan

some directly allude to kyle, others are bullshit

prior to being publicly in a relationship, stan and kyle are out to their friends and family on personal accounts but not in the public eye. stan’s socials are mostly business anyway, and kyle’s socials are mostly discourse and drama and bullshit. he mentions having a boyfriend but is very vague about it

that said, they are seen spending time together but its seen more as them running in the same circles rather than them being close (god forbid CLOSE)

*callout post voice* hey can you tag your c/r/i/m/s/o/n d/a/w/n posts???? their lead singer has literally been seen spending time with the f1r3s1d3 guys so he probably shares in their reactionary viewpoints and that makes me uncomfy ://

kyle and cartman occasionally mention an elusive friend named stan and give barely any details about him so people think stan is just some dude that they know irl and not lead singer of hit band crimson dawn

and no one’s gonna think it’s him because stan’s cd persona is just so normal that no one is going to connect the dots and go “oh this batshit insane person from their stories is the same person who is relatively regular on stage!”

there is minor speculation because they did grow up in the same area and are the same age but people enjoy their delusions and cognitive dissonance

speculation is still mostly redditors that get barely any interactions

slightly before the outing butters casually refers to stan as kyle’s boyfriend but people just think he’s being homophobic

this is after stan comes out so people think he’s mocking stan for his sexuality --> butters homophobia allegations, cancellation #832349038 for him. just another tuesday

cartman addresses this on fireside by saying something along the lines of: look, i know butters, and i can confirm that YES, butters knows exactly what he’s doing. he hates gays, he thinks stan is a dumb fag, and he is violently homophobic, and--

people love to ask craig and those guys about it on their podcast but they never answer anything because fireside is the enemy and they actively dislike them

craig answers exactly once with the response: “who the fuck are kyle and eric?” and that’s it

on a personal level, kyle is cool with tolkien and jimmy, but they all collectively despise cartman, so fireside as a pod is not a friend

stan and kyle’s relationship is eventually outed because butters accidentally lets it slip like for REAL on his show and shit hits the fan

“Who is Stan Marsh’s Boyfriend and Why Should You Be Concerned?”

after stan and kyle are publicly an item stan goes on the pod a couple of times, but not until the initial outrage dies down

when he comes on the show it’s treated as a Very Special Episode. kenny guest stars so that he can help cartman to terrorize stan and interrogate him with wildly personal questions

stan fucks around with his answers

“who tops?” “..........we’re both virgins?”

this answer leads to cartman and kenny taking 10 minutes to debate the reality of this assertion

kenny asks if they know about the camera that cartman has set up in their bedroom

cartman has seriously considered putting a cam in kyle’s room so he doesn’t laugh as hard at that as one would think

kyle is so fucking angry. he’s making a pissed off buzzing sound the whole time

at some point, i don’t know when, stan definitely pulls out his cartman impression

#microceleb au #suggestive

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luvarlo · 1 year

Text

Hiro with an Introverted and Shy s/o!!

a/n: this is my first request *giggles* anyway i’m so sorry i didn’t get to this sooner but i’ve been busy with school and all that boring stuff, BUT I LOVE THIS RQ SO TY @brushofease FOR REQUESTING IT 🫶🫶

I think he’s very observant so he picked up on your shy demeanor before starting to talk to you

and he knew you weren’t going to be very out going and trust me he’s completely okay with that,

so when you finally get comfortable around him he’s so hyped up

after you guys had been friends a while he asked you out and you said yes

ugh y’all r so cute stop

you balance each other out very well, he’s a very hard working and out going person and he’s VERY stubborn

you prefer to work on the inside, being independent is what you do best and it was nice that he understood when you wanted to be alone

after a few months of being with each other your head starts to get a little cloudy and thoughts of how much better off he’d be without you just fogged up all your vision :(

so you started distancing and he noticed and respected that maybe you wanted some alone time, so he let you be

though you were a bit dryer when you texted and you only gave short answers maybe you just had a bad day everyone gets those

his final straw before he confronts you about it is when you walked straight past him at sfit and even started walking faster to your next class

he knows where you sleep at night you aren’t safe 😨😨

he does go over to your house though and you have a heart to heart

you tell him what’s been going on and how you feel as though you don’t fit in with your friends, ‘i’m dragging you behind too,’ you sighed through your nose, leaning on the wall behind you

he sighed too and you thought that was it.. he finally realized how much of a drag you are, but at least he would be happy now right?

WRONG HAHA

“Listen, you may not be the most daring person but it’s not like you stop me from doing what i think is right, in fact you always encourage me to do what’s right. You’re amazing and i know you don’t feel like that right now but just know that i will always appreciate you, i love everything that you do for me and i can only hope that i’m as helpful to you.”

he finished with a quick breath in before continuing

“But if you really don’t wanna be with me that’s okay, i understand” he tilted his head and grinned

but what he wasn’t expecting was for you to LITERALLY JUMP ON HIM and hug him

you guys talk more about it and he asks how he can make you feel better about yourself.

and he helps a lot, he cares abt you sm 🫶🫶🫶

a/n i don’t really like this one LMAOO i feel like it’s not my best but i do hope you enjoy anyway 😊😊

#foryou #x reader #fanfic #big hero 6 #hiro hamada x reader #big hero six

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cherrygorilla · 2 months

Text

Ice Pop 🍃

Aaaah, Happy Birthday, Danelle! I hope you're having a wonderful day! I honestly didn't think I'd be able to get anything done to celebrate this year with how busy I've been, and I felt terrible, but luckily being at home for the last week has given me some time on a night to whip a little something up. It's not the best, or the most exciting, but hopefully it can somewhat make up for my months of radiosilence, and bring you a little joy today. 🥰

Now, this can pretty much be considered a standalone AU one-shot, but it was supposed to be a section in the third part of ASDO - yes, I know I haven't even finished the second part yet, I'm working on it lol - however, due to changes in timelines and things, it's not going to be able to work like this anymore. Still, I wanted my idea for two certain characters meeting for the first time to have some sort of a home, even if it is no longer canon. And who knows? Maybe it'll help for their appearances in other stories haha. But yeah, if you're wondering about the context of the rehearsal it's centred around - that's what it's for 😂

Anyway, enough of my rambling! I hope you enjoy it, and I hope you have a great day however you end up celebrating! You're the best internet friend a girl could ask for, so you deserve it! Happy birthday, Danelle!! 🥳

"Ugh, she just gets prettier every time I see her."

As rubber sneaker soles met blistering asphalt, Vivien couldn't help but giggle. Swinging the door of the sky blue convertible shut, she turned to face Carrie, affectionately rolling her eyes as she saw where her gaze, and flattery was aimed. Proudly plastered across the side of Sound Stage 4 was a colossal banner advertising the newest season of Find Your Voice, decorated with the gigantic heads of eight of its core cast members. And off to the left hand side, beaming down the camera lens over the top of an advanced geometry textbook, was the very same blonde as the one standing there admiring it.

"And Miles wonders why he can't get Royce to stop calling you vain," Vivien sarcastically teased.

Reluctantly tearing her gaze from the studio's prime position billboard, Carrie settled the younger brunette with a contented smirk. "I don't care; it's true," she said, holding back a giggle of her own as she swung her car door shut. "And besides, a little self-love's healthy."

"A little?" Vivien snorted with a raised eyebrow.

Carrie didn't have a comeback for that one, instead just laughing along with the teenager as she locked up her Mustang and rounded the car to join her. Bidding the oversized version of herself a final goodbye with a proud grin and a mock salute, as a way of thanking her for her contributions to their show's ever-growing ratings, Carrie began leading Vivien out of the studio parking lot.

Jogging a few paces to match the blonde's brisk walking pace, Vivien soon returned to scanning her surroundings like she'd just set foot in Munchkinland after a tornado. By now she had thought she was somewhat familiar with the movie world her extended family lived in, or at least the portion by the beach where they all resided. But exploring the downtown area brought that same giddy novelty of her first visit flooding back to her. It was like the whole city had a filter over it, turning up the saturation of the colours in the brickwork or shop signs, and bringing out their warmth to match the sunrays kissing the freckles up and down her arms.

Once she'd finally regained control of her childlike wonder, and had stopped gawping at the buildings lining the street they were strolling down as though they were exhibits at a science museum, her attention returned to the same question that had been plaguing her since Carrie had ushered her into the passenger seat of her car. "You know, you still haven't actually told me where we're going."

"I'm taking you to the venue."

Despite her nonchalant tone, Carrie's revelation made Vivien's breath catch in her throat. "Already?"

"Well yeah," Carrie replied, seemingly confused by the panicked squeak in the girl's voice. "I thought you'd want to get some practice in first."

Melting into a smile with a relieved sigh, Vivien let her shoulders relax and her feet be guided by the clunky, patterned platform boots parading her down Sycamore Close. Acting as a rather effective tour guide, Carrie gave her a walking tour of her and Miles' weekday stomping ground - she pointed out the mechanic shop where he worked, where their favourite sandwich shop was, which place did the best coffee, which place did the worst coffee - she even pointed out the laundrette Miles almost flooded after an unfortunate lunch-break run-in with a meatball sub, and threw in the anecdote that went along with it for good measure. There was the florist shop, the record store, the pharmacy - the whole street looked like it could have been plucked straight out of a movie set. And, in a way, Vivien supposed it had been. But as they rounded another corner, the pastel awnings and inviting smells disappeared.

It was far from a dump; palm trees still sporadically lined the road, and storefronts held haphazard displays of their products to entice the sparse crowds of customers. But the trashbags sitting at the curbside, and the uneven sidewalk slabs, made this part of town feel a little less polished than the rest. Just as Vivien finished reading the intricate chalkboard sign hanging outside a local bookstore though, and she turned back to follow Carrie's lead, a cloud of smoke obscured her view of the path ahead.

Thankfully, the haze had dispersed by the time the girls approached, but the stench of weed that replaced it made Vivien's nostrils itch. Scrunching up her nose, she slightly quickened her pace, hoping to get to a bakery down the street that could drown out the smell before her eyes started watering. But in the seconds that followed, she didn't know what surprised her more: the fact that Carrie was acknowledged by the stoner responsible for the smoke show, or the fact that she actually stopped to talk to him.

"Heyyyy, Carrie-oke! What the hell are you doing here so early?"

"We're down a drummer, so we need an emergency rehearsal with our stand-in," Carrie replied, a hint of amusement colouring her tone - whether that was due to the circumstances, or the fact that she sensed Vivien's utter confusion was a mystery to the brunette though.

"You lost another one? What happened? She didn't-"

"Yeah, Amber dumped him… Again."

"Fucking hell," the guy snorted, taking a quick drag on his joint and blowing the smoke out of the corner of his mouth, away from the girls, which Vivien appreciated. There was something about his entertained grin that drew her interest - or maybe it was that mischievous twinkle she spotted in his dark, albeit bleary chocolate brown eyes as he lifted his round sunglasses onto the top of his head. Either way, her intrigue towards the young man was making the weed smell more and more tolerable with each passing second. "Two drummers in four months? Is she trying to set a record or something?" he cheekily continued.

"I don't know," Carrie sighed with an eyeroll at her friend's expense. "But she definitely made the right call with that last guy; he was a total deadweight."

"Was that the coupon guy?" he checked. And once Carrie nodded her confirmation: "Oh yeah, he was a fucking moron. She can do so much better."

"Exactly," Carrie replied, throwing her head back with a hearty laugh at the brunet's earnest response. "But, yet again, her commendable level of self-respect has left us without a drummer less than eight hours before doors open. Hence the emergency rehearsal."

The deeply pensive expression, pulling the guy's eyebrows together, had Vivien biting the inside of her cheek to stop herself from giggling, especially when he revealed what he'd been thinking so hard about.

"Hence…" he mumbled, through a mouthful of the BLT sandwich he'd picked up from the plate balancing precariously on the windowsill beside him. "Gnarly adverb... Respect."

Carrie just shook her head with another amused grin. "That stuff's hittin' good this morning, huh?"

"Oh yeah," he chuckled with a contented nod of approval. "You want a hit?"

Whilst the offer itself wasn't too much of a surprise to Vivien, the length of time Carrie appeared to consider it for certainly was. For a moment, she even thought she saw the blonde's arm twitch, as though instinctively moving to accept, before she caught herself and shook her head. "No, I can't-"

"Oh come on, just a little one."

Again, Carrie almost appeared convinced, before her better judgement won out. "No, I- Look, maybe later," she eventually compromised, taking a step towards the propped open, painted brown door beside them to prevent any attempts at further complaints from the stoner. "I already told you, I'm not here to just hang out. We've got to rehearse."

"We? What are you talking about? Who's-?" But as Vivien followed Carrie's lead, inching towards the doorway, she looked up to find that set of bleary brown eyes fixed on her for the first time that conversation - any traces of an end to his question completely falling out of his head the second he spotted her.

Now that she'd actually been acknowledged by the guy, Vivien took the opportunity to fully take in his appearance: fascinated by the fact that such a creature even knew Carrie, let alone spoke to her like a friend. His dark, taupe hair fell in half-hearted curls by his shoulders - more in limp waves than anything, which were pushed away from his face by the arms of the scratched, round sunglasses balanced atop his head. His scrawny frame was hidden by a baggy denim jacket that looked as though it was about four sizes too big for him, with the sleeves pushed up to his elbows, and a shirt beneath patterned so intensely she couldn't look at it for long without seeing spots in her vision. Old, flared, brown trousers; scuffed, but clearly well-loved, maroon boots; and a jumbled collection of leather bracelets, fabric wristbands, and peace sign pendants completed the look - a look she could only think to dub: dishevelled bohemian. If he'd have been on the cover of a history book about the hippie movement she wouldn't have batted an eyelid. And yet here he was, standing right in front of her, looking at her as though she'd just been beamed down from a spaceship.

Apparently her very existence was all it took to stun him into silence; his brain clearly needed all the energy it could get to process what he was seeing. She could practically hear its cogs spinning on overdrive as he searched her face for some recognisable quality. And just when they were starting to sound like her old laptop loading up The Sims, he tore his gaze from her and fixed it back on Carrie.

"…Who the fuck is that?"

The genuine confusion riddling his expression amused Vivien to no end, having to catch herself before a giggle escaped her lips as Carrie, evidently more familiar with his antics, simply replied: "It's Viv."

But the explanation made absolutely no difference in that empty, freckled head. The guy still looked as lost as ever.

"It's Vivien," Carrie tried again. But when she was met with a further, if not slightly more irritated, blank stare, she let out a frustrated scoff and turned so that she was fully facing the airheaded brunet again. "Vivien O'Brian-"

"You say that like you expect me to know who she is," he cut in with an incredulous scoff of his own.

"You do know."

"Then who the fuck is it?"

"Vivien," Carrie fired back with great exasperation - the kind that could only come from years of friendly, pent-up frustration. "She ice skates. She reads books. Miles talks about her like once a fucking week!"

Ethan's eyes lit up like a Roman candle. "Yoooo, where is Miles?" he asked, all inquiries about the brunette forgotten in an instant at the very mention of that all-important name.

But his eager grin was met with a look of disapproving disbelief. "I don't know," Carrie snapped, left floundering for an answer thanks to the stoner's inability to hold a properly structured conversation. "At work, I assume."

He looked about as satisfied with Carrie's answer as she had with his question though, tipping his head up to the sky and letting out a frustrated groan that would have given a sulking six-year-old a run for his money. "You seriously didn't bring him with you?" he checked, quirking an eyebrow at her out of the corner of his vision - clearly hoping this was just some dorky prank set-up.

"No, I don't think he gets off 'til 5," Carrie flatly fired back.

"Ughhhhh." There went that stroppy groan of frustration again. "That's fucking forever away. What am I supposed to do 'til then?"

"You could help us set up for our rehearsal," Carrie suggested with a smirk. "You know, like any respectable entertainment coordinator would."

He just rolled his eyes. "It's gonna be so boring without him though," he whined, scuffing his boot along the sidewalk as he dejectedly kicked a pebble against the side of the building.

Now it was Carrie's turn to roll her eyes as she let out an incredulous scoff. "Need I remind you, we were friends way before Miles came into the picture?"

The stoner levelled her gaze for a beat before a knowing smile tugged his lips into that same mischievous grin from before. "Yeah, but from that point on, nothing else really mattered, did it? Let's be real," he chuckled. Despite the ribbing, and obvious penchant for a certain mechanic, there was a glint in his blood-shot eyes that revealed his fondness for the blonde after all though.

And the feeling was clearly mutual since she was still willing to continue the conversation - she couldn't even successfully stifle her smile back as she shook her head and muttered a quick: "You're such an idiot."

The brunet made no attempt to argue - in fact he let out an amused snort of agreement as he reached for the rest of his half-eaten BLT.

Seizing the opportunity to take control of the conversation again, Carrie attempted to steer it back on track with an exaggerated, "Anyway." Tugging her guest closer, and dramatically gesturing to her, she continued, "That Vivien we talk about all the time: this is her."

The guy nodded thoughtfully. "Vivien…" he mumbled through a mouthful of bread - still playing that oh-so challenging game of connect-the-dots.

"Yes, Vivien," Carrie confirmed, as though encouraging a kindergartener. "She stayed with Miles and his brothers last April."

"Mmm," he nodded, finally showing some evidence of understanding. "She's dating that other mechanic guy - the one Miles lived with for-"

"No," Carrie cut in sharply over Vivien's incredulous laughter. "That's Mick and Butchy."

"Well how the fuck am I supposed to-?"

"Viv's dating Royce," Carrie explained, cutting off his complaint before he could derail the conversation any further.

"She's dating Royce?" he questioned, half-mumbling to himself as he fought through the disbelief the new information carried. His eyebrows scrunched in incredulity, his lips curled into a sort of confused grimace-

But then it finally clicked - the force almost popping his eyes out of his head in the process.

If the sudden change in the stoner's expression hadn't already set Vivien off to laugh harder, the sharp gasp that followed, and sent what remained of his mouthful of sandwich flying into the back of his throat, certainly did.

"Holy shit!" he eventually managed to choke out between the hacking coughs to help dislodge the piece of bread. "That was actually real?" he went on to ask once he'd caught his breath again, staring at Carrie with tear-stained eyes and a look of utter stupefaction. But she just nodded and chuckled as she handed him a bottle of water from her purse. "I thought Miles just made that up so I'd stop thinking his brother was a lame-ass," he continued, pausing to gulp down the offered water and rid himself of any remaining evidence of his mini choking fit. Holding the water bottle out to its original owner with a heavy, contemplative sigh, he levelled her gaze and lowered his voice to ask a dubious: "You're definitely sure it's real then?"

"You do know you can talk to her yourself, right?" Carrie checked, raising her eyebrow as she took back the bottle and gestured to Vivien yet again.

The guy paused, mouth slightly agape, as the realisation steadily dawned on him. Shifting his gaze to the brunette, he instead posed the question to her. "...You're actually dating Miles' brother?"

"I am indeed," she replied, smirking through poorly stifled giggles at the caricature of a guy's reactions.

"And they're definitely not paying you to say this?"

"I wish I was getting paid," Vivien snorted. "Easiest buck I'd ever make."

A thoughtful nod followed, as though impressed by the girl's honesty. And then came another bite of that BLT as he mulled over the revelation a little more. "Well, shit," he eventually settled on, with an amused smirk of his own. "Good for him… And you, I guess," he added, with a vague nod in Vivien's direction.

And then there was silence. It seemed as though he felt his role in the conversation was over now if the way he engrossed himself in inspecting the limp piece of lettuce sticking out the side of his sandwich was anything to go by. But Carrie had other ideas.

"Is that it?"

"Is what it?"

"That's all you have to say?" she raised an eyebrow and pressed.

"Well what else do you want me to do?"

But Carrie's disgruntled eye roll told Vivien she wasn't about to spell it out for him. "You have the social skills of a fucking garden snail," she muttered, before turning to the younger brunette with an almost apologetic shake of her head. "Well, since he's not gonna introduce himself - Viv, this Ethan. I had other, cooler friends I wanted you to meet first but, unfortunately fate had other plans."

Ethan still frowned despite her teasing tone. "I know you don't mean that, Cole," he protested, to which Carrie just smirked and rolled her eyes again.

Vivien felt like she was constantly on the brink of laughter watching the pair interact, caught between genuine amusement and utter disbelief. "So you two are like legitimately friends then?" she asked, feeling the need to check since her brain still didn't feel ready to process what her eyes were telling her.

Matching mischievous grins graced their faces as Ethan nodded and Carrie stifled another chuckle. "Don't look so surprised," she added after clocking the girl's reaction.

"No, I just-" Vivien floundered, struggling to articulate everything her brain was trying to process into a proper sentence. But after several failed attempts, she let her straight-to-the-point inner voice take over talking duties, with a spluttered laugh to join it. "How the hell did it happen?"

"What do you mean?"

"Well I just- I thought I had an idea of what your friends would be like…" Vivien trailed off, again at a loss for words.

"And this isn't it?" Carrie asked with mock-surprise as she jerked her thumb in Ethan's direction, just as he took another hit of his joint.

"...Well, we call you Barbie for a reason," Vivien teased. "I just didn't expect Little Miss Perfect to hang out with…"

"Someone who looks like they crawled out of Fraggle Rock?" Carrie offered with a smirk that quickly set the girl off to laugh.

Luckily, Ethan started laughing along with them - but not for the same reasons. "Yooo, they call you Barbie?"

"That's what you took from that?" Carrie checked in disgruntled disbelief.

"That's so fucking good," he mumbled as another amused grin settled on his lips.

But Carrie just rolled her eyes and turned her attention back to Vivien. "I swear you kids think I'm some sort of saint," she chuckled before teasingly adding, "You're not the only one who can have cool, weird friends, you know?"

"I never said I was," Vivien argued through a laugh. "I just don't know where you two could have ever crossed paths. Where did you guys meet?"

"He works on the sound for Find Your Voice and a couple of other shows on the lot. So I've known him ever since I booked the part," Carrie explained whilst Ethan worked on finishing what was left of his BLT. "He was just another part of the crew at first, but, because I talk to anyone and everyone all the time-"

"'Cause she loves the sound of her own voice," Ethan cut in through a mouthful of bacon, cheekily licking mayo off his thumb.

Carrie silenced him with a withering stare - but his lingering smirk told Vivien that he wasn't phased in the slightest. Still, Carrie was able to finish the rest of her explanation uninterrupted. "-I started to talk to him between takes, you know, since he was always there with the boom mic. And then one thing led to another, and before I knew it, he was sacking off lunch with the other tech guys to come and raid my dressing room for cookies."

"Oh come on," Ethan frowned at the light ribbing. "Don't pretend you wouldn't do the same for your mom's snickerdoodles."

"You ate crumbs out of a trash can."

"And I'd do it again," Ethan shot back with an earnestness that just made his and Carrie's sibling-like bickering even more entertaining. "You can't talk anyway; you ate that piece of pizza Miles spat out into a napkin the other week."

Ethan's accusatory frown, paired with Vivien's grimace just made Carrie's attempts at a justification even harder to come by. "Listen, I was not…" she began, eyes darting to the brunette on her left as she tried to phrase this in a way that wouldn't tarnish her reputation any further. "...of sound mind that evening. Plus, he's my boyfriend - I've tasted worse than saliva."

As if the first part of the confession hadn't shocked her enough, Vivien jerked her head back in reaction to that last line. "Eww, Carrie!"

Ethan's loud bark of laughter was a completely different response though. "Hey, I never said there was anything wrong with it," he eventually chuckled. "I'd have probably eaten it if you didn't."

"And I bet you'd have loved it too, you freak," Carrie fired back with a smirk despite her nose wrinkling in disgust.

Ethan's proud grin was all the evidence she needed to know she was right.

Once Vivien had recovered from her future sister-in-law's nausea-inducing revelation, she was able to continue with her inquiries about the scruffy stoner she'd become so fascinated with. "Wait so you know Miles too?"

"Know him?!" Ethan squawked.

His reaction sent Carrie's eyes to the heavens as she tipped her head back in despair. "Don't get him started, Viv," she wearily warned.

But Ethan didn't even give the brunette the chance to question any further, seizing the opportunity to talk about the mechanic with both hands, and a lovestruck smile. "Miles is my soulmate; my cosmic chaperone - we're spiritually bound by the very threads of our existence."

The edges of Vivien's smirk twitched, dying to let the guffaws it was holding back free as she raised an eyebrow. "That close, huh?"

Ethan gave the girl a solemn nod. "He's the ketchup to my mustard."

"Well shit," Vivien deadpanned, matching the guy's energy perfectly. "You can't get closer than that."

Shaking her head at the pair, and the situation in general, Carrie went on to explain: "The second I brought Miles on set it was game over. He asked Ethan some dumb question about a song on the radio and he's been following him around like a bad smell ever since."

Both physically and metaphorically.

"It was Money by the Rolling Stones, and we still say it's our song to this day, thank you very much," Ethan cagily retorted, as protective as ever over his friendship with Miles, before adding a slightly more in character: "That guitar line is gnarly."

"'Our song'?" Vivien questioned with a snort. "Are you guys gonna use it for your wedding or something?"

But the teasing remark bounced off Ethan like a rubber bullet as he mulled over the proposal with a mellow grin. "I could dig it."

Again Carrie just fondly shook her head, at both Ethan's response and Vivien's reaction. "Believe me, Viv," she went on to say. "They'd need no encouragement. I mean, you'll see it for yourself later, but they're inseparable when you get them together. Like, think of the biggest bromance you know, then times it by four…and you might be getting close."

"They're really that close?" Vivien chuckled in disbelief.

Carrie nodded intently. "They're like fucking limpets."

"I can't believe Miles has been hiding the fact he's got a best friend from me for all these years," Vivien said with cheeky incredulity. "I'm never letting him live this down. I didn't think losers like him were capable of having best friends."

"Well believe it, because he's not going anywhere," Carrie snorted. "Believe me; I've tried."

"Protest all you want, 'oke. You and I both know you'd be lost without me," Ethan said, slinging his now free arm around Carrie's shoulder and pulling her towards him, before affectionately squidging her cheeks together in a way that immediately had her trying to squirm out of his grip.

"I'd have one hell of a mopey boyfriend, that's for sure," Carrie compromised with an affectionate roll of her eyes as she finally somewhat relaxed into the awkward embrace. "And a pretty boring social life."

"Exactly!" Ethan said, that same mischievous grin from earlier making its fateful return. "Who else would you have to go and play midnight mini golf with? And who'd you get to play ice tag with you on set?"

"Isn't it called 'freeze' tag?" Vivien teasingly questioned. "And why are you adults playing freeze tag at work?"

"Uh, we're 22, we're not dinosaurs," Carrie retorted. "And it's not 'freeze tag', it's 'ice tag': a Carrie and Ethan original."

"Well if it's not freeze tag then what is it?" Vivien laughed.

"Duuude, it's so fun!" Ethan enthused. "You've gotta sneak to one of the craft services ice buckets, grab a couple cubes, then pick your victims. If you get one down the back of their shirt - or pants - without them noticing 'til it's already down there, and without it melting, you get a point - and they then have to be the next one to go get the ice."

"The camera guys hate it," Carrie laughed. "But it makes long filming days so much more fun. We've got like half the cast and crew playing now."

"Yeah, the scoreboard in her dressing room's insane," Ethan added.

"So you've built an entire friendship around a game about ice cubes?" Vivien questioned with an amused quirk of her eyebrow.

"Pfft, no, we hang out all the time!" Ethan said.

"Yeah, believe it or not, Miles and I do voluntarily hang out with him when we're not running around after you guys," Carrie chuckled.

"To do what?" Vivien snorted.

"All sorts. We've had a few good movie nights lately 'cause we found out Ethan's got like the weirdest taste in movies ever; he's seen shit like 'Attack of the Crab Monsters', but not The Wizard of Oz."

"Well I have now, but it was fucking weird, man," came Ethan's review. "The scarecrow guy's face looked like it was melting off." Directing his next point at Vivien in particular, he departed his first bout of wisdom on her. "Not one to watch high, dudette, trust me."

"Noted," Vivien acknowledged.

"So yeah, we've had a couple of rogue movie nights if Ethan's been in charge of securing the projector reels," Carrie continued. "But other than that it's just like general, everyday stuff. At least for us, anyway. We don't really get much chance to properly plan stuff out - it kind of just happens. Like the other day, after work, Amber started trying to teach us all how to do one of her crazy yoga routines - we'd never have suggested that until we did it, but it was some of the most fun I've had in weeks."

"Yooo, I was so fucking good at it. I might get her to show me some more stuff next week; I really felt like I was tapping into something powerful with it."

"Oh it was powerful alright," Carrie acknowledged with a giggle. "Miles couldn't believe it - I haven't seen him laugh that hard since he watched you take 20 minutes to make that packet ramen."

"Look, I just have other skill sets to most people," Ethan retorted with a resigned sigh. But a fleeting memory soon had his confidence racing back. "You've gotta admit I was a key player in helping you wreck Eric's car though."

Vivien's jaw dropped to her purple sneakers. "I'm sorry, you did what now?"

The guilt was written all over Carrie's pretty little face. Knowing she had no leg to stand on if she attempted to deny it, thanks to Ethan's unending honesty, she caved with a sigh. "Ok, yeah, so we may have totaled Eric's sports car-"

"Fuck, it was so fun!" Ethan exclaimed. "Me, Amber, and Carrie went to town on that thing. And Julie-"

"Anyway," Carried quickly cut in, trying to change the topic of conversation.

But the disbelief glittering in Vivien's emerald eyes wasn't about to let her get off the hook so easily. "Oh no, I'm not going anywhere until I hear this story," she grinned eagerly.

Letting out a defeated huff, Carrie compromised. "Alright, fine, I'll tell you later. But not a word of it gets back to Miles, ok? Because he has no idea we were the ones responsible for that - and we need to keep it that way."

"Oh come on, why can't I hear it now?" Vivien asked, sticking Carrie with her classic puppy dog eyes for extra, black-mail-y effect.

But unlike her other half, Carrie wasn't so easily won over by the pleading. "Because we need to go practice," she fired back. "We've wasted enough time talking to this bozo already."

"It's not been a waste," Ethan indignantly replied. "I've had a great time."

"So have I," Vivien agreed with a chuckle.

"And I'm very pleased for you both, but that doesn't change the fact that we need to rehearse. So hurry up and unlock the function room for us, tech boy," Carrie bossily snapped back despite her affectionate eye roll.

"You see how she speaks to me?" Ethan snarkily muttered to Vivien as though behind the blonde's back.

"I thought he was the sound guy for your TV show, what does that have to do with us rehearsing here?" Vivien asked, scanning the outside of the building for some sort of clue as to what the place even was.

"He is, but he's also the entertainment co-ordinator here, which means he's in charge of all the live music equipment, and the emcee for the night," Carrie explained as he stamped out the end of his joint with the toe of his boot. "So we're stuck with him all day, I'm afraid."

"I'm also your number one competition, so you'd better be fucking good," he retorted with another mischievous grin. "'Cause you've yet to beat us once."

"You've got a band too?" Vivien asked.

"Yeah - me, Miles, Donny, Rizzo and Desky. Don't let Carrie brainwash you about her bogus trio though, 'cause she can talk all she wants, but she knows she only put it together 'cause she was jealous of ours."

"You're so full of shit," Carrie retorted.

"Oh yeah? Then how come you've lost the crowd favourite vote to us every single time?" he cockily shot back. And when, for once, she didn't have a snapback at the ready: "That's what I thought. Fucking. Poser."

"Brag all you want, but we're gonna make you eat those words tonight now that we've got Viv on our side," Carrie coolly replied, sparing the brunette a smug smile.

"Oh shit, yeah," Ethan said, his competitiveness vanishing once he remembered the reason for his new friend's visit. "You're filling in as their drummer, right?"

"Yeah," Vivien confirmed, trying to hide the fact that her stomach did a backflip at the very thought. "At least that's the plan."

"Gnarly," he acknowledged with an impressed nod. "Where'd you learn to play?"

"My brother Riven taught me back when we were kids."

"Nice, you ever done any shows before or-?"

"Hello? What part of, 'we need to go practice', do you not understand?" Carrie cut in with a pointed glare in the stoner's direction.

"Uh, we're having a conversation here," Ethan countered, totally oblivious to her frustration.

"We actually have a band of our own with two of our friends that we've played a couple of shows for, yeah," Vivien carried on with a giggle at Carrie's expense.

"Oh really? No way!" Ethan exclaimed, seeming genuinely excited by the prospect.

"Yeah, and we write all our own songs."

"Seriously? That's so-"

"Guys!" Carrie tried again - one more stall away from stamping her platform go-go boot on the ground and throwing a toddler-style fit. "Come onnnn."

But yet again, Ethan wasn't bothered in the slightest by her rising irritation. In fact, he was rather irritated himself by her impatience. "Carrie - can't you see I'm talking to my new friend here? She has great knowledge to bestow, and I have much to learn - so quit interrupting; we're having bonding time. You're being rude."

"You can't pull the 'friend' card on me with Viv; she's like my little sister-" Carrie tried, but her indignant protests were drowned out by more of Ethan's senseless rambles.

"So, we'll circle back to the band thing later; I need to do some mental collage-work first, 'cause your canvas is feelin' a little blank, dudette," he began, leaning back against the brick wall and closing his eyes, as though to better visualise the 'memory version' of the brunette before him. Pressing a couple of fingers to his forehead, in an attempt to strengthen their cerebral connection, he continued, "We'll lay down some basics first. Quick-fire: name, birthday, last bone you broke."

Vivien had to bite back a laugh before responding: "Vivien O'Brian, August 22nd, and it was my wrist when I was 10."

Ethan's eyes peeled open, shining with intrigue. "No way, you've actually broken a bone?"

"Why are you so surprised? You asked," Vivien chuckled.

"'Cause most of these losers I ask don't do anything exciting enough to risk bodily harm," he snorted back, with a smug glance in Carrie's direction, relishing the steam that was practically rising from the top of her head. "How'd you break it then?"

"My skating partner dropped me," Vivien said, luckily able to look back on the memory with a more optimistic view than the other participant.

"'Skating partner'?" Ethan mused.

"Yeah, we're figure skaters - my friend Riven and I; the one who taught me to how to play the drums," she explained, catching on quickly that the more context clues she offered, the sooner they'd get to the point.

"What, like roller skating?"

"No, ice skating," Vivien clarified with a giggle.

Ethan's eyes glazed over in understanding. "Ohhh, right. Like ice hockey."

"No, not like ice hockey," Carrie cut in with an exasperated sigh, trying to break it down as simply as she could. "Figure skating. It's like ice dancing. Think the winter olympics - lots of twirling - little dresses-"

"Ohhh, no way! You do all those crazy jumps and shit?" Ethan exclaimed - finally catching on.

"Yeah," Vivien acknowledged. "At least three times a week, usually."

"At the olympics?" he asked, genuine amazement coating every word.

"No, we're not at olympic level," she chuckled, deciding to forgo the explanation that the olympics, at most, happen 3 times a decade. "Not yet, anyway. Our coach is working us towards it though, so who knows? Maybe one day."

"Holy fuck, we're talking to a future olympian, Carrie," Ethan enthused, bumping the blonde's arm in an attempt to share the excitement with her. But when she just rolled her eyes, yet failed to hold back her smile, he continued. "Do you do other competitions and stuff though? Or do you just like practising and doing it for fun?"

"No, we compete. I've got like a whole shelf of trophies in my room," Vivien said, poorly stifling a laugh as Ethan's eyes grew wider still. "We're the reigning national champs for our age bracket."

"Woahhhh, far out, man," he breathed. "That's awesome!" Thumping Carrie's arm again, this time a touch harder to coincide with his growing excitement, he gave her another aside, "Yo, Carrie, we're talking to like a legit celebrity here."

Vivien didn't know what she ended up laughing harder at, Ethan's genuine awe at her achievements, or Carrie's deadpan look of resignation. Those blue eyes of hers looked like they could have melted steel.

Snorting out a laugh of his own at the blonde's expression, he turned back to Vivien with a smirk. "That never gets old," he grinned, evidently well-versed in teasing Carrie about her level of fame. "Anyway, enough about her; she gets more than enough attention. What other cool, hidden talents are you hiding under those glasses?"

"I don't know, I don't think anything else really counts as a talent," Vivien downplayed. "I've taken a few archery lessons, I like going and exploring abandoned buildings-"

"Woah, woah, woah, 'abandoned buildings'?" Ethan questioned - bloodshot eyes once again sparking to life. "What the hell? You're so cool. She's so cool," he said, turning to see if Carrie was sharing in his bewilderment too. "How the fuck did you end up dating Miles' lame-ass little brother? No offence, but like-"

"Ethan," Carrie scolded.

"No, come on, not in like a mean way; he sounds great - I'd protect him with my life - but like, all I ever hear from Miles is that he fucking reads nerdy library books," he attempted to justify.

"Well I like reading too, you know," Vivien countered with a teasing smirk.

"Yeah, but you still seem to have a life," Ethan retorted, with all the social graces of an ox. The hearty laugh Vivien let out in response soon had him back to grinning like an idiot though. "Yo, why's Miles kept us apart for so long? You're awesome - we've got such a good energy going here," he chuckled.

"Yeah, why has Miles kept us apart?" Vivien agreed, looking to Carrie for some sort of explanation.

Begrudgingly rejoining the conversation, she explained with a teasing smirk at the stoner's expense. "Because you're a terrible influence - I speak from experience. He's gonna kill me when he finds out I've introduced you two without his supervision." But then she turned her attention to the younger brunette. "And because the second you see them both together, his cover as the somewhat responsible adult looking after you kids is gonna be blown out the water."

"Oh come on, how bad can he be?" Vivien laughed.

"It's not bad, necessarily - it's just that when they're together, and you're not around, all responsibilities go out the window, and the 22 years of pent-up stupidity are unleashed," Carrie explained with a laugh of her own.

Grinning mischievously, Vivien said, "In that case, I can't wait for his shift to end."

"Yeah, which is gonna be soon if we don't hurry up and get our asses inside," Carrie said, shooting Ethan with another pointed look.

"Huh? D'you hear something, Viv?" Ethan asked his new protege, intentionally blanking the steadily seething blonde.

"Ethan, come onnnn, please," Carrie pleaded, bouncing on the balls of her feet like an impatient child. "You can continue this while we're setting up."

"Weather's pretty nice this morning, huh? Not too humid, not-"

"Fine, I'll just have to kick the door down," Carrie resigned, hiding her smirk behind his back. "I hope no one's left their guitar lying around where it could get damaged if-"

Whirling around with a look of pure horror, Ethan muttered a sombre, almost warning, "Don't even joke about that; you know she's my baby."

"You play the guitar?" Vivien questioned.

"'Play's putting it lightly; I think I can noddle away on that thing better than I can talk," Ethan snorted.

"Like that's hard," Carrie teasingly retorted before continuing. "As much stick as I've given him this morning, he is really good on that guitar," she went on to acknowledge with a genuine smile. "Riven, Miles, and Butchy can talk all they want, but they're not a patch on this guy - I think if he wasn't so mentally stunted he'd be considered some sort of prodigy or something."

"You know, you can just give me a genuine compliment," he said, frowning slightly at her friendly jab.

"I know… I'll start when you start," she retorted with a smirk he soon reciprocated, before shaking his head and letting out another snort of laughter.

"Ok, we'll stick with this; we've got a nice thing going here, why ruin it?"

Grinning at the pair of old friends, and the way Carrie squeezed him into a hug from the side, Vivien's ever-active brain started formulating a new idea - one that would hopefully get her in the good books of both cartoon-cliches come-to-life. "Well, if you're this good on the guitar I've obviously gotta hear it for myself," she prompted, drawing the brunet's attention back to her.

"Shoot, of course, I'd love to play something with you - you know any-?" Ethan began to gush, shoving Carrie away from his side in favour of chattering away to the brunette again.

"Don't we need to get into the function room first though?" she asked, sparing a quick glance at a suddenly very excited Carrie.

"Oh shit, yeah. You shoulda just said, Viv. I'll go unlock it for us," Ethan chuckled as though the concept was entirely new - sending Carrie's eyes to the heavens again.

But the blonde's groan of frustration was drowned out by Vivien's optimistic giggle, as she teasingly mumbled under her breath, "See? That wasn't so hard."

"You two are really gonna make me regret introducing you both, huh?" she said with a weary chuckle of her own as Ethan disappeared into the building.

"On the contrary; I think we're gonna have more fun than ever," Vivien laughed back. "I need to see more of this 'wild' side he brings out of you. First I find out you're bi. Now I find out you smoke weed and could go down for criminal damages to your ex's car with that…thing. I feel like I barely even knew you before."

Carrie just chuckled to herself at the teenager's amazement. "I did try to tell you I was more than just Miles' girlfriend."

"What else are you hiding now? Surely there can't be more," Vivien demanded. "Are you gonna introduce me to your secret three-year-old or something?"

"Eww, no," she laughed. "Just be patient, you'll find out when you're ready," she smirked with a confident mystique Vivien could only have dreamed of. "I've gotta keep at least some of the mystery alive."

Before Vivien could press the older girl for any further clues though, a bedraggled head of shoulder-length brown hair appeared in the dark doorway. "Come on, Ice Pop. It's all unlocked."

Vivien looked from Ethan to Carrie and back again, perplexed. "Ice Pop?"

"Yeah, Ice Pop," Ethan simply confirmed, with a dopey grin.

"Nicknames are kind of his thing," Carrie explained, her voice barely above a whisper as she leaned in to inform the brunette. "It's just how his little pea-brain works. And once he's settled on one for you, you're kind of stuck with it - unfortunately," she added, thinking back to the months of convincing it took to get him to stop calling her 'Coleslaw'.

"Why 'Ice Pop'?" Vivien questioned - as amused, and fascinated, by the guy's thought process as ever.

"'Cause you ice skate," he explained as though it was obvious. "And you're wearing purple - you've actually just got like a purple vibe."

"What does purple have to do with ice pops though?" she asked.

"Well the purple ones are my favourite, and you're my favourite ice skater, so…" he replied, miming the fusion of ideas with his hands for added effect. "Ice Pop."

Poorly holding back her flattered, yet still slightly amused grin, Vivien tried to protest. "You've never even seen me skate."

"Minor details," he dismissed with a wave of his hand. "You're the only one I know by name though - so, you don't have a lot of competition. But that still makes you my favourite."

All the skating talk was lost on Carrie, but there was something about the conversation that caught her attention: "The purple one's are your favourite? They taste like ass."

"Probably why they're my favourite," he snorted as Carrie just wrinkled her nose. Not wanting to delay the imminent jam session any longer, he quickly turned back to Vivien though, managing to catch her attention between her hearty laughs. "What do you say then? You like it?"

"Yeah, I like it," she grinned, warmth spreading throughout her chest as she watched the stoner's eyes glow with appreciation.

"Sweet," he breathed, holding her gaze for a beat before beckoning her towards the wooden archway in the brickwork. "Come on then, Ice Pop. Welcome to The Grapefruit."

Following a nod of approval from Carrie, who promptly trailed behind her, Vivien let Ethan lead her through a bead curtain and into a dimly lit, oak-panelled hallway. The floor almost immediately dropped into a stairwell, lined with black and white photos of musicians, and prints of various fruits in the same assorted shades of orange, yellow, and green from the beads at the entrance.

As they descended, Vivien, as talkative as ever, especially now that she was more at ease around the guy, decided to start probing Ethan for more details. "So if I'm Ice Pop, and Carrie's Carrie-oke - does Miles have a nickname?"

"Nah, you can't improve upon perfection," Ethan sighed, grabbing the railings of the staircase and launching himself down the last four steps. "I do have a 'government name' I call him though when he needs me to talk some sense into him," he continued after landing with a thud in front of a two-way corridor.

"Which is?" Vivien prompted as they turned to the left and reached another door.

"Miles per Gallon, Miles per Hour, Miles from Anywhere - there's a couple variations," he replied as he pulled a bunch of keys from his back pocket and started working on the lock. "Just depends on my mood."

"Oh my god, I can't wait for him to get here," Vivien giggled. She didn't know what she was laughing harder at: Ethan's nicknames for her honorary big brother, or what she imagined his face would look like when he realised she now knew about them.

"Well, in the meantime, make yourself comfy. 'Cause it sounds like you're gonna be here a while," Ethan chuckled as he pushed the door open and stepped aside to let her enter first. "Behold: your performance space for the evening."

As Vivien stepped into the room, that same surreal feeling she got the first time she set foot in the Wet Side Story world flooded through her - it felt like a dream, like everything would disappear in a puff of smoke if she touched it. But as her sneakers met scuffed, wooden floorboards, she stayed very much in one piece - as did everything else around her. The wood-panelled walls continued into what she now understood was an underground bar - but, despite the lack of sunlight, it was far from dingy. The overhead lights bathed everything in a soft, golden light, which complimented the room's colour scheme perfectly. The same shades of rust orange, mustard yellow, and olive green from the beaded curtain at the entrance clung to the upholstery and decorations - and yet brighter pops of colour, in line with the bar's citrussy namesake, made the whole room come to life. The earthy tones, mismatched furniture and clashing patterns made it feel so quintessentially 60s, but that just made Vivien love it even more - even if it did smell vaguely like stale beer.

"Hold up, how old is she? D'you think I'm allowed to have let her in here if she's not 21?" Ethan asked Carrie as the pair followed Vivien into the function room.

"It's not like you're gonna serve her any alcohol, she's just here to perform," Carrie said, brushing off his concern with ease. "And besides, if she wants anything she can just sneak some of mine," she added with a mischievous grin the stoner quickly shared.

"Yeah, what am I even saying? Since when did I start giving a shit about following the rules?" he snorted, pocketing his keys and crashing onto the nearest, faded leather couch.

"Alright then, Viv," Carrie continued, stepping up behind the teenager, who was still gazing around the room in wonder. And yet it wasn't until the blonde put her hands on her shoulders and steered her towards the centre of the room that she even noticed the sprawling stage - complete with mic stands, a dusty piano, several guitar amps and that all-important drum-kit. "You ready to take her for a spin?"

Vivien's first instinct told her 'absolutely not', but there was something about the warmth in Carrie's hopeful smile, and Ethan's earnest encouragements, still fresh in her mind, that gave her pause. Maybe she could do this after all; they certainly seemed to think she could. And she wasn't going to get over this stage fright without trying, so she might as well give it a go with a supportive audience - a rather unconventional, supportive audience; but one that, given her newfound fondness of the pair, and their apparent abundance of love for her in return, one that she wouldn't have traded for anything.

#p.s. there might be another surprise later that coincides with this 👀#probably not as exciting - but definitely necessary by now lmao #Vivien #Carrie #Ethan

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monstrousproductions · 3 months

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[warning: transphobia, specifically from parents. seriously. take care of yourself i mean it.]

hiya dad, it was my 17th birthday today (technically yesterday, since it's past midnight, but i digress). i'm writing in cause it kinda sucked and most of the other adults who i'm out to (and are supportive) are my teachers and i don't really want to bare my heart over school email. i came out as trans (ftm) to my family a skosh over 2 years ago, and my parents still haven't accepted it. they're the sort that think that trans people exist, but *you* (that is, i) can't possibly be one of them. my mom's been trying to use fully neutral language and avoid using any names, which is... technically better than misgendering me, i suppose. my dad told me i was "full of shit" when i came out and has no hesitation about deadnaming me since them. there's lots of very sad specific anecdotes about the various responses they've had to me trying to assert that i'm a guy, but this is gonna be pretty long as is, so just take my word for it. i also came out to my older brother at the same time, and he's been hesitant, but willing to try about it.

all of us were busy during the day today, but we were going to open presents tonight, and my mom made a birthday cake for us to have afterwards. the first half of that went okay, though my dad was fully sullen--this isn't unusual; there's a whole lot else going on with my dad but getting into it would require a laundry list of warnings. anyway, after the presents my mom said that she wanted to consult me about decorating tomorrow's cake (i'm hanging out with some friends and will be having a larger cake due to the number of people). however, this was apparently a subtle way to get me out of earshot of my dad, since my mom wanted to know what i wanted to do about singing "happy birthday," since singing it with my actual name would send my dad "over the edge" (to be clear, this was almost certainly an accurate assessment). the options were to either a) sing happy birthday with 1. my actual name (horrible social repercussions for days if not weeks) 2. my dead name (i don't like being a doormat) or 3. a childhood nickname (which, while theoretically better than option 2, still implies that there's something wrong with my actual name), or to b) skip having cake as a family and not sing.

i chose b, for reasons obvious--my brother was also the only one who was hungry for cake, so it hopefully didn't seem weird. my mom said that it was my choice, but she wanted to sing me happy birthday and would use whichever name i picked, even if she didn't do it with the rest of the family. i agreed to this, and my mom said that she'd tell my older brother where i was (my brother and i are fairly close, and he's in college and usually living on-campus, so i was supportive of this). our conversation had gone on for long enough at that point that my dad and brother were having a full conversation, so i went up to my room to do homework that's due tonight. my brother came up a little later with cake (he says that cutting into a fresh birthday cake that wasn't his felt like thieving, which was sweet--all puns intended--of him), and we had cake before he needed to head back to campus. i started on my assignments, and after a bit my mom came in. i asked if she wanted to sing happy birthday then, and she said that she didn't think she'd be able to get the words out bc she'd be crying too much. rn i think she's on a walk or something.

that's pretty much the whole saga. as i said, i'm hanging out with some of my friends tomorrow, and i'm out to them (and tbh most of them are queer and/or trans) so that should be good, and my mom said that she'll sing the version with my actual name (though she didn't phrase it like that) with them, which will be a first. i'm not physically unsafe, and my parents would be fine if i weren't trans (like, in most regards they're good parents, they're just bad at not being transphobic). but i've also had a really shitty birthday and i didn't even get to be sung happy birthday with my actual name, and i'm really tired of getting hurt.

i'm not exactly sure if i have a question or not. i think most of the decisions i'll really want a second opinion on are gonna start being made when i turn 18 and can medically and legally transition, and right now i'm mostly waiting and trying to take care of myself as best as i can. still, if you have any sage advice i'll certainly take it. anyway, my name's Julian and if you could wish me a happy, albeit belated, birthday i'd really appreciate it.

Oh, kiddo! This sounds really, really tough xxxx

First of all, thank you for having the consideration to add a content warning - I appreciate, it not just for myself but for everyone else on the blog.

I wouldn't usually weigh in on people's personal problems (at least, the ones that aren't about ghosts and ghouls...) because it can be hard to maintain healthy boundaries around this stuff - at the end of the day, I am still a stranger on the internet!

As such, my first piece of dadly advice for you is to talk about this with people who know you and love you and who can support you in a more direct, ongoing way.

That said, of course I can wish you a very, very happy birthday, lovely Julian! I'm sorry the day itself was a bit shit, and I hope your friends can help you celebrate the way you'd like to. I had a pretty remarkably shitty 16th birthday, and can certainly sympathise.

Obviously I can't weigh in on any of the big decisions in your future (taps the 'stranger on the internet' sign again 😅) but I hope it's some reassurance to know that adulthood is on the horizon. As you get older, you'll be better placed to advocate for your own autonomy and to set and maintain the boundaries that make sense to you.

Until then, taking care of yourself is the best thing you can do. It's hard, and it sucks, but you're worth every ounce of love and care you can give yourself. Stick with it, sweet Julian, and here's to a happier year ahead! 💕

#monstrous askbox #cw transphobia

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imagine-lcorp · 2 years

Text

Girls Just Wanna Have Fun (One Shot)

Request

Hey! Can you write a fic where fem reader and Lena go on a vacation to a nice beach and have a nice and Lena actually gets some peace and quiet for once lol. Can be NSFW if you would like

A/N: Hey beautiful beans! Just so you know I’ve not abbandoned this ship, sorry it took lo long to come back. There’s still lots of requests in my queue and I plan on fulfilling each one of them. I promised I was going to after all. Pls forgive, I’m a slow writer but I always enjoy writing for you guys. Tho I’m still deciding if I should do a second part nsfw... Anyway, hope you like this little piece, and let me know what you think!

Lena Luthor x Fem!R//Word Count: 1,060 -------------------------------------------------------

When you planned this little trip, you were thinking it was going to be all about fun and relaxation. You would sleep late, wake up until late morning, have some nice breakfast in bed, take long baths, and enjoy the Caribbean paradise as much as you could.

And so it was for the first couple of days, until you noticed your always busy girlfriend wasn't enjoying herself as much.

"Lena, I swear, if you don't put your phone down I'll take it and throw it away so hard you will need Supergirl to retrieve it back from outer space."

Lena froze mid-text and turned to look at you with a sheepish smile. You pulled your sunglasses down and narrowed your eyes at her.

It was the second time you visited the beach, and it was again the second time Lena seemed to be busy with something else. You couldn't entirely blame her for it considering she was the CEO of a multi-billion dollar company, a consultant for the DEO, and best friends with National City's superheroine, Supergirl. Someone, something, somewhere, was always going to need her attention but you knew even someone as amazing and powerful as her had her limits.

"Sorry, darling. You want me to get us more cocktails?"

"Nuh-uh, don't darling me." You sat straight on your deck chair. "What I need is for you to stop working for a minute, alright?"

Part of the reason you had organized the trip was because you had started to notice some changes in her demeanor. She was leaving work late, barely sleeping at night, and you weren't sure if she was keeping up with her meals. You had spoken with her assistant, Jess, about it and she had confirmed your suspicions about it all. Work seemed to pile in her office, the DEO and Supergirl called her every now and then to help them deal with considerable threats, and Lena still had to manage her business and her own scientific projects.

The cherry on top of it all had to be you, as she always did her best to find time to spend with you.

Lena Luthor was the most wonderful human being but it was costing her so much just to exist. That's why, when Jess suggested her boss was in dire need of a break, you didn't think twice about planning a little get away for you two alone.

The plan was simple, take Lena to another country with a beautiful beach, preferably on the other side of the planet, spend at least a week in a great five-star hotel overlooking the ocean, take her to the spa, and do whatever necessary to keep her mind off responsibilities. So far, it wasn't working.

"You know I can't." Lena said doing her best impression of puppy eyes.

"What's so important this time?" You pulled yourself closer to her as she too sat straight on her chair to show you her screen phone.

"The gala for this years charity?" You frowned in confusion. "Don't you have like a whole team organizing it already?"

"I do, but I need it to be perfect." She retrieved her phone and looked at it. You could see the worry slipping in her expression.

"Here, give me." You reached over with your hand, prompting Lena to give you her phone. She did after a moment of hesitation and you smiled at her as you could read her thoughts. "Not gonna throw it, I promise."

Instead, you locked her phone and left it on the table near you, between your cocktails, and raised your hands again for Lena to hold them. She watched you with some suspicion in her eyes but followed suit as she reached for your hands. She caressed them with her thumbs and you felt your heart melting at the gesture. You couldn't stay mad at her when she did that.

"Hear me out for a second, okay?" Lena nodded. "You have been planning this gala for a year, making everything in your hands to get more and new organizations and people to join. You already did the hardest part, so let your team do the rest. They know what they are doing."

"I know, but what if someone backs down from the event? Or if they need me to take care of something personally and I have to go back and-"

"Hey, hey." You searched her eyes. "They got this. They are the best at what they do, you know why? Because you, Lena Luthor, only hire the best of the best. Ask Jess if you don't believe me."

That made her smile. "I do believe you."

It mean the world to her that you were always there to remind her what was important at times like these, helping her realize nothing was as bad as it seemed and that she shouldn't waste the rare and precious moments she got to live with you without a catastrophe at hand.

"Good. Now, believe me when I say you deserve some peace and quiet. We are already here, let's enjoy ourselves."

"Peace and quiet, sounds good." She leaned to give you a kiss abut you raised a finger at her as she got closer, stopping her midway.

"Before that, you gotta promise me, no phones or other electronic devices, and no business calls. At least for the rest of the day. Alright?"

"Do I get my kiss if I say yes?"

"You can get more than a kiss of you do." You smirked.

"Oh, what else are we talking about?" Lena raised a brow with a new found interest and for a moment she seemed to really forget about her worries.

"We could have a little more fun." You said teasingly and looking at her lips. "The kind that is more enjoyable at night, after a nice dinner and that sweet wine you like."

"Sounds good to me."

"Do we have a deal then, Miss Luthor?"

"Deal." She said, and you couldn't help but smile as she closed the distance between you two.

For the rest of the day, as promised, Lena kept her hands off her phone and tried her best not to think about whatever happening back in National City. She was too busy thinking about what the end of the day would bring instead and how happy you made her.

#lena luthor #lena luthor imagine #lena luthor imagines #lena luthor x reader #lena luthor x you #lena x reader #lena x you #fem!reader #female reader #one shot #request #girls just wanna have fun #lena luthor x female reader #fem reader

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canirove · 11 months

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The Princess & the Football Player | Chapter 19

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Masterlist

"Look who has remembered where her best friend lives!"

"Ha, ha, ha. You are so funny, Eleanor" Roberta says. "But you could also come visit me, you know?"

"I know" I sigh. "But it looks like when I'm not busy you are, and when you aren't busy I am."

"And we had told ourselves that we would never become that type of friends that forget about the other when they get boyfriends."

"I don't have a boyfriend" I chuckle.

"Then what is Declan? Your secret lover?"

"Honestly... It does look like it, yes."

"But you want him to be more than that, right? For him to be your boyfriend."

"I do. But it is... complicated."

"No, it isn't. You just ask him" she shrugs.

"Roberta, Dec and I aren't like you and Mason. I am not like you. Like any of you" I whisper.

"Eleanor..."

"Look who has decided to grace us with her presence!" Sophie says, walking into the room. "Wait, did I interrupt something?"

"Nothing, don't worry" I quickly say.

"Mason finally set you free?"

"You also are so funny, Sophie" Roberta says, rolling her eyes. "Must run in the family."

"We got it from our dad. Anyway, why are you here?"

"Can't I just come visit my best friend and her sister?"

"You can. But are you here just for that?"

"I actually am not, no" Roberta says with a big smile.

"Oh... She's planning something" Sophie laughs.

"I am, yes. Are you girls free next week?"

"I... think so" I say. "Why?"

"Because we are going... to Paris!"

"What?"

"It’s been ages since our last girls trip, I miss it! Besides, I heard they've opened a new vintage store that is like super exclusive, and we must visit it."

"And the fact that next Saturday England is playing against France in Paris is just a coincidence, right?”

"Maybe" Roberta smirks. "C'mon, Eleanor. It'll be fun! We'll properly catch up, enjoy our time together, and then end our trip watching our men be sexy on the pitch. Maybe find Sophie a nice French lover too."

"I like how the last part of your plan sounds" Sophie smiles.

"What about that girl you were texting? Maggie was she called?" I ask.

"Wait, the last thing I heard was about a guy called... Finn?"

"They both are in the past" Sophie says. "But having a French lover until Leah finally answers my dms sounds fun."

"Leah? Who is that?" Roberta asks.

"Leah Williamson, the football player. Sophie is in love with her."

"I'm not in love with her, but I do like her. A lot. Though she seems to be more interested in you."

"What?" I laugh.

"Oh, c'mon Ellie. Haven't you noticed the way she looks at you every time you've met?"

"No" I shrug.

"I sometimes hate you."

"The feeling is mutual" I smile.

"Imagine both of you dating football players. Your mum would go crazy" Roberta laughs. "But let's go back to what is important right now. Who is coming to Paris?"

"I'm in" Sophie says, lifting her arm. "And maybe that new vintage shop has your birthday dress, Ellie."

"Your birthday dress?"

"The birthday dress. The one Declan likes thinking about when he..."

"Sophie!"

"What? He basically confessed it" she shrugs.

"He did" Roberta adds. "But let's make that our Paris mission: find the dress so Declan can take it off you."

"And find me a French lover."

"And find Sophie a French lover. Do we have a deal?" Roberta asks.

"Deal" Sophie answers.

"Eleanor?"

"Deal" I sigh.

━━━━━━❃━━━━━━

"If they don't have it here, I'm giving up."

"No one is giving up" Roberta says. We've been in Paris for a few days already, and we've visited most vintage shops in the city looking for my birthday dress. They've called some of their contacts, taught us how to search for it online and even asked the brand who made it. But nothing. It's like the dress never existed.

"If mum hadn't done that cleaning a couple of years ago..."

"It still would not fit me" I shrug.

"But maybe you could have had it fixed or something."

"Good news" the shop assistant interrupts us. "We know about someone who has that dress."

"Really?" Roberta, Sophie and I say at the same time.

"Yes. It's part of a private collection, but when we told the owner that it was for the Princess of Wales, they couldn't say no."

"That's amazing!" Roberta says, clapping her hands in excitement.

"When could we get it? We are leaving in a couple of days, and it may need alterations" I say.

"We'll send someone in a bit to pick it up and take it to the dry cleaners. You can come tomorrow for a fitting."

"Thank you so much."

"Just doing my job" the shop assistant says with a big smile.

━━━━━━❃━━━━━━

"I still can't believe we found the dress. And you look so good on it!" Roberta says while we get ready for the game. "Declan won't know what it him when he sees you. If 18-year-old Eleanor drove him crazy, the present one will... I don't know what you will do to him."

"But we can imagine what he will do to her."

"Sophie!" I say, trying to hit her but missing.

"Look at how red her cheeks have turned" Roberta laughs.

"I hate you. Both of you" I say while I try to focus on finishing my make up.

"Declan and Eleanor sitting in a tree... K-I-S-S-I-N-G! First comes love, then comes marriage, then comes baby in a baby carriage!" Sophie sings.

"Roberta, can I borrow your mascara? I don't know where I put mine" I ask, ignoring my sister.

"You lost it because you were thinking about Declan's thingy" she laughs.

"You can call it by its name, Sophie. She was thinking about Declan's di..."

"Roberta, your mascara" I insist, rolling my eyes.

"It's on my make up bag over there" she says, both her and Sophie giggling like idiots.

"Holy shit!" I scream, her bag falling from my hands.

"Please tell me there wasn't a spider among my things."

"Worse. Why do you have a photo of a dick on your make up bag?"

"What?" Sophie says, her eyes wide.

"Oh" Roberta chuckles. "I was wondering where that one had gone."

"That one? There are more?"

"Yup. Mason and I have been taking them since we first went to Italy. It's a way to stay connected when we are away from each other. We see the photos, and..."

"Wait, wait, wait. That is Mason's..." Sophie says, her eyes getting wider.

"Oh dear Lord."

"It's quite nice, isn't it?" Roberta says, looking at the photo.

"I mean..." Sophie says next to her.

"Oh… Dear Lord" I repeat.

"C'mon Eleanor" Roberta laughs. "Are you telling me that you've never taken spicy photos?"

"Of course not! Have you forgotten who I am? Imagine the scandal if somehow someone found them."

"It would get nasty, yeah" she sighs. "Things already were like that with that paparazzi photo where it looked like Damiano was eating you out, so if they were to find one where that is actually happening..."

"Exactly. So you must be careful. If someone finds them and they recognize Mason..."

"I know, I know. We are being careful."

"Clearly" Sophie chuckles.

"We are. This won't happen again."

"It better not. Because people will probably drag you and make you look horrible while defending him because he is a man. It's always the same" I warn her.

"I promise we will be careful, Eleanor. I will be careful."

"Great. Now, should we get a drink before we leave? I seriously need to forget about what I just saw. Especially when I'm about to spend two hours watching him run after a ball."

"Rude" Roberta laughs.

"It wasn't that bad" Sophie shrugs. "Can I see it again?"

"Sophie!" Roberta and I say at the same time.

"What? We haven't found me a French lover, but this can help... Somehow."

"Hell no. Mason is my boyfriend. That is my dick and no one else's. I'm not sharing."

"All yours then" Sophie says, sticking out her tongue.

"Don't laugh, Eleanor" Roberta says. "She may try to go after your man next."

"Let her try" I smirk, making Sophie roll her eyes.

#declan rice #declan rice fanfic #declan rice imagine #football fanfic #football imagine

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rhenuvee · 10 months

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Do They Get Invited to the Fontaine Masquerade Ball? [Mondstadt]

A/N: Based on my post where I begged Hoyo to give us a Fontaine masquerade ball event. If they don't, this is the post I am using to quench my thirst.

Warnings: This is just my opinions and thoughts! If you think differently it is okay! (In my original post I said that I thought that the "higher-ups" would get invited so that is what I'm basing it off), written in an informal way, not all characters have headcanons!

≿————-　❈　————-≾

Yes - Jean, Kaeya, Diluc, Eula

Jean: She's anxious that something may go wrong if she's not there, especially with Klee. Lisa reassures her that everything will be okay (Lisa can be strict too so I think they'll be fine). Her co-knights (and Diluc) try to comfort her as well saying it is something to be proud of for her. I think she starts feeling better when she receives compliments from other guests of her being the acting grand master.

Kaeya: Was surprised he was going, because he thought Jean would've asked him to stay (Diluc: the Knights of Favonius are inefficient, you really think you'd stay?). He remembers that one time his adopted father was away for two days for the ball, and can't fathom that he'd get this chance. I just know his outfit for the masquerade ball is e x t r a v a g a n t.

Diluc: He remembers his father getting invited, so now it's his turn. He is hesitant on going, since there is business to take care of with the winery, possible memories of his father, and of course- his "dear" brother who is also attending. He probably is asked to bring wine by the organizers. When he gets dressed, Kaeya's like huh you're not wearing the darknight hero mask? And if you listen closely you can hear retribution.

Eula: Also surprised she got an invite because of her lineage... but on the other hand, she is not her ancestors, nor is she getting invited for that reason. Amber is excited for her and begs her to tell her all about it when she comes back. She is the best when it comes to the ballroom dancing part.

No - Amber, Lisa, Barbara, Razor, Bennett, Noelle, Fischl, Sucrose, Diona, Rosaria, Mika, Klee

Most of them are too young anyway... however that doesn't stop them from getting excited about a ball even though they cannot attend.

Fischl: She claims she is not jealous, because in her kingdom they have their own masquerade ball. Fontaine has an exquisite ballroom with the most brilliant chandeliers? The Immernachtreich has a better one, all purples and black with candles and Oz themed lights. She immediately organizes it along with asking her mom to make her favourite cold cut platter, and invites all her friends.

Bennett: Hears about Fischl's masquerade ball and is very much convinced that her's sounds better than Fontaine's. When he attends Fischl's ball, (well it looks better in her head but) he thinks it's the most amazing event he'd been to.

Klee: She is sad that Kaeya and a few of her other friends have to leave, though it's only for a bit. Klee asks him to bring back something like a Fontaine-Dodoco, Kaeya chuckles and says sure. Lisa and Albedo are the main people who have to keep her out of trouble.

Razor: Potatoes.

Well... - Venti, Mona, Albedo

Venti: If this guy can somehow make it to Lantern Rite and Irodori, then he can get to the ball. Not saying he was ever invited, but something tells me he has a scheme twirling his fake mustache and sneaking in. I won't deny that it would be fun to see him at a masquerade ball. Insert Diluc's deadpan face when he sees an alcoholic bard made his way to Fontaine. Venti makes up a fake title- "The Best Wine Taster of Teyvat"

Mona: She has wrote on the Steambird which drew in a lot of readers, so I think she has a good chance of getting invited. She'd be able to connect with any Fontaine fans that enjoy her astrology columns. I also think her outfit would be very elegant.

Albedo: I feel like he has a chance of getting invited but declines for two reasons. One because he has a lot of research to do and two, because someone needs to keep Klee from blowing up Mondstadt (and possible sus-bedos on the loose). I believe if anything, Sucrose would be the one to convince him to go since there could be more things alchemy related to discover in Fontaine, or other alchemists or scientists to meet.

≿————-　❈　————-≾

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tutuandscoot · 1 year

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2/17 Practice deep dive analysis

Part 2

So as they are about to be called to start as the other team has finished, they stop with their little conversation they were having as they lapped the rink. It’s like when they go into dance hold, whenever they are in it they are in ‘business mode’. It’s like ‘ok no fooling around now’ (not that they do), but.. like they are in business mode and they of course are fully serious when they skate around holding hands proper (the handy holdy/pinky hold) but it’s more ‘professional’ in the stricter sense of skating. I hear it in my head (in reference to a different moment where they were switching from proper to dance hold- here they weren’t holding the going into dance hold) as him (or her) saying, ‘ok kiddo, show time. I have to be your partner now’. It’s feels odd to analys it and share my take on it since I have no clue if this is how they actually interpreted it, but it’s like the proper hand hold is more friendly, more coupley, more ‘I want to hold your as close as possible’ where as dance hold is more occupational. I just find interesting to watch them go in and out of that, like as soon as they take dance hold- specifically as they enter for their practice run through/performance, it’s like ok, serious time. And it’s beautiful because they immediately go into that zone and their roles in the partnership are immediately established and they are there to do a job. Ok what it is is: In regular hold they are equals as in best friends who see each other as equal humans who love each other equally but in dance hold they are equals in the sense of their shared responsibility and commitment to their dance partnership and the different roles they both have to execute to perfection. Also this here isn’t the only time- there have been many where they manage to change holds/take hands right in the blind spot of the camera so it’s like a magic trick they are suddenly holding 🥰

The ✨drama✨ as they present. You can tell mentally before they present they’re in it and focused, switched to the same frequency, but as they present they A R E their characters. And what I love about how they have always done this, is the subtle way they set the tone. I’m quite off put by the way many teams do it, whether it’s some ultra characterised entrance (which if it suits the program fair, but often it’s too corny) or a lot of teams would just be overly “sensual” and it didn’t feel real, then others where they had some flashy ‘thing’ as their names were announced then just slumped back over and made their way to position (I can give examples of all of these if you want me to). But with TS it’s all internal - which is the same way they’ve described how they feel and create movement together- it comes from their emotion or the psychology of the program whether it’s them or their characters’ psychology. So here they present and he’s immediately stalking her with a sinister, seductive stare, wringing his hands, feeling that sensuality in himself. Her projecting that tantalising femininity, doing so much yet so little- so much of it is coming from her eyes. It all comes from the inside out with them and because they are physically stunning athletes, so trained, so aware of how they look and relate to each other, that internal self talk/mantra, the story they have put themselves inside they can convey physically- BEFORE they even start dancing.

I don’t think I’ve ever seen anyone talk about how impactful this opening is. I also don’t think I have ever seen them this far apart on the ice in a choreographic sense. Obviously in ice dance, there’s the general rule that you are never to be more than an arm length (so fingertips touching) from your partner (excluding static start/end poses) which to be fair most teams (that I’ve watched) do generally stick to but you do see frequently partners far apart either choreographically or bad tracking ie things like twizzles. Anyway. The fact that they start so far apart is so impactful. Obviously within seconds they get close together and touch for the first time in T H A T lift (seriously what a GOAT era way to start a program). We all rave about how powerful their connection is and they dance so close the intimacy is burning, but what’s so cool is how they can do that from this far away as well. They can quiet an arena to being able to hear a pin drop. Everyone stops what they are doing because it’s as if they are staring lasers at each other. What they can do with literally nothing, just standing 10 metres apart looking at each other.. is insane. The emotion, power, chemistry, etc they project is like nothing else and all this to say is physically this is a simple, potentially nothing opening but what they do with it even before they move or the music starts I don’t think anyone else could- make you feel conflicted between feeling like you are intruding on something very private yet simultaneously unable to look away- and they don’t want you to. 🔥

(I’m just going to use one gif to talk about this but it applies to the whole practice). Something about this run through was just so effortless. I know this is the start but by the end they are moving just as freely and energetic as the beginning. It just looks so easy. So assured. So exact and precise yet not devoid of charisma, humanity, being in the moment. And in writing this I think that’s what they meant by achieving *EXCELLENCE* instead of perfection. (BRB having a mind blown moment).

I love their movement quality; the silkyness, the way they merge out of appearing as one figure- one being and then splitting in two. In moments they do move differently and interpret movement differently- ie in the ‘roxxxANNE’ *head head* moment at the end of the twizzles- there is a slight difference (which is perfectly fine) but in moving together like this here- they were just so made to dance with each other- that statement does not take away from the COLOSSAL amount of work it took them to get to this point, but I feel like you can say they were both made for each other and worked hard to be the best the can possibly be at moving together- those two statements don’t contradict each other. Also the rhythm of the way they move. There is moving musically to the rhythm/melody/beat but then there is their internal rhythm that is connected to each other’s (and it actually is because the make damn sure it is every time before they skate) and that makes up a huge component of facilitating things like lifts- the rhythm of how lifts work and contributes to making it so seamless- neither of them is rushing or doing more or less work than they need to. They are moving together rather then either of them doing more work then the other or against what is natural for the movement to work. As I said it’s so precise and just looks so natural.

… (following on from that point and without wasting a gif bc it applies to the whole thing) the way they emote during this practice is something else. There’s practicing the emotion or faces bc it’s part of the program but then there’s being emotional bc you truly love it and love being those characters- that’s what you feel from them, that it’s so honest and the love of what they get to do just pours out of them whether it’s practice or performance. And I kind of feel like even though this is so incredibly close to perfect, them knowing they are so ready, they are kinda playing with the performance a bit. Esp from him- it feels like he’s just letting go and fully embodying his character to a point that isn’t as controlled as the actual competition performance was.. and how cool that they can do that. Most people you have to drag emotion out of but them… and (side note) there’s that bit of Scott saying (in the context of finding himself as a performer, and I’m also gonna add- not that he said it but I feel like it’s true based on other stuff- he just wanting to do his best for Tessa and be amazing for her) how he might push the acting or emotion further than what he thinks his necessary and that’s when T says ‘that’s it I love that’ 😭 (sorry just take a moment to visualise scootie getting all excited when T says she loves what he did- he always felt he wasn’t the dancer/performer she was so when she says she loves that he trusts her with his life he knows that’s what she wants and loves oh my heart❤️‍🩹). So yeah, them being the performers that actually have to be pulled back sometimes because they give so much- which I was always taught it’s so much better to have to pull back a bit that having it dragged out against your will.

(Bc I’m never gonna miss an opportunity to gif this)

I’ve probably tried to explain what this is before but just let me do it again.. I know to the laymen eye this looks like them being super sexy and seductive for the sake of it and them forgetting they are in public and don’t want people to know about their super hot and sexy secret relationship🙄.. But just use your brains for a sec and remember this isn’t some fake af reality show and in fact they are at the most important event in their athletic careers- their craft and yes, JOB they have dedicated their lives to. They are the best athletes in their sport, meticulously rehearsing the routine that will win them gold.. again. The way these practices work is their music will play in full and they will practice pre-determined sections of the routine with music then before and after do the missed sections without music. The said program they are practicing is Moulin Rouge!, a famously seductive, romantic, sex driven story in which they are portraying very complicated characters with both true and impulse- driven motivations. In their sport of ice dance, it is required of them to act and portray their characters in an understandable sense through movement and facial expressions as well as interpreting the music whether it be instrumental or with lyrics. As part of this story exploration both in the workshopping/choreographic process, and once completed, it is customary for dancers to play with movement that does not become set choreography in the piece, for exploration purposes and even as a matter of being ‘in’ the character and finishing moments off with reactions that are not choreographed, but emerge almost unprompted as a matter of being in the world you have created. THAT’s what this is. They knew they were not continuing with the choreography, so instead, because they are so ‘in it’ they continue with physically bringing to life the internal dialogue they both are reciting in their heads as they dance-dialogue that is far more complicated and nuanced that the 4 minutes of program choreography. It’s beautiful to think about them diving head first into bringing this story to life.. the most important decision of their lives was to find their perfect FD, and they did find it, and it makes me emotional to think about them every day in the early phases of creation, them just exploring everything they could do with it- the romantic parts, the violent parts, the sex and seduction.. creating something from nothing is the most beautiful thing we can do as humans and they had done that their whole lives and now got to create something that was truly setting their hearts on fire. I doubt they ever wanted to leave that place- being in the head space of that beautiful, heartbreaking story and so I don’t blame them at all for spontaneous moments of improvisation where they could just BE those characters. Then of course the moment after is the best bit- how they turn to each other and break and you know how much fun they are having. They LOVED what they got to do and it breaks my heart that people thought they couldn’t just love what they did and that was that- it couldn’t be that simple, and yet it was and the smiles on their faces say it all.

I alluded to this in my super long analysis post on this lift that when they practiced here, they almost did it too good.

What I mean by that is they kinda over popped it. They use to term ‘pop’ to describe their execution of lifts, there is a crucial moment when they both have to be in the exact right place at the right time, use their coordinated breaths, plié, trajectory etc to make the lift happen.

In saying this lift is ‘over popped’, it looks to me like Tessa got slightly more air than she usually would off the back flip launch, causing Scott to catch and rotate her slightly earlier and higher in the air, where usually, there is typically more of a forward and downwards height she is at in the dive where he would begin the anchor point and manipulation of getting her to sitting up. (All this is more easily observed in video format). In this instance any semblance of a typical ‘lifting’ motion is erased (not that this has much of a typical ‘lift’ motion to it anyway) because she has all but launched herself to the height of the (sitting up) lift position. The rest of the movement continues *excellently* and without having scrutinised it like I have it would maybe be hard to tell, but comparing it to the performance version (and this is not meant as an insult or a bad thing) this looks a bit over excited where as the performance (from a movement perspective) is controlled and calculated.

I really want to hear from them the actual decision process for both changing the lift initially for the team event, and then going back to this. I imagine when they got to Seoul for their private practice between events there was a conversation like ‘so we’re going back to the original lift?’ and someone else went ‘yep’ and then they both said ‘yeah F*ck it this is what it’s suppose to be and we want it to be so as long as we do it perfect..’.

This in general is such an incredibly beautiful moment. They’ve just been through this big, traumatic event and it’s like he’s checking her to make sure she’s ok. The way he looks at her the whole time through that circling movement, bends over so far to legitimately take her in- as I said earlier, not just doing it because it’s the choreography, but because he as both Scott as well as his character adores her and is actually taking a moment to let her rest and make sure she’s ok (😢🤧). There’s some really beautiful photos of this moment and it’s one of my favourites in the program given it comes after such a memorable, highlight moment, it’s easy to forget there are beautiful, more nuanced moments that are all critical to the story- not just fill in chore. I also really love how they tried to keep- even if it changed chronologically and choreographically a bit, the moment in the original ending- the moment from Manon when she does the falling angel arabesques then the twist into the fall back and he’s caring her dying body through its final moments, there were times where he would kiss her (body) in that moment and with this it’s a bit different given the position he’s not really able too, but they’ve kept the intention and emotion of that moment in this revised version.

Also just the way he handles her. I know I go on about it a lot and it may seem like I view it as one-sided between them, but it’s not in the respect of a hetro relationship, it’s in the respect of dance partners and duty of care the man has over his woman (and I can speak on this because I’ve had partners that treated me well and others that didn’t) and Scott treats her like a freaking angel. I’ve said before the way he holds her head and anytime he’s holding her in a position where she’s lying back, how important it is in those positions just safety wise to have your head supported properly if not by someone else then yourself, holding your posture/strength correctly as to not injure your neck- which Tessa would 100% be doing anyway because she is so strong and well trained (and now this is where a bit of body language stuff comes in I guess which I am not an expert on) but the way Scott holds her like that- holds that part of her oozes of such commitment and attentiveness to her safety- the way he holds her all the way out of that position to standing straight, like he actually putting her back to vertical, where he has all her weight anyway- she has to do almost no work to get out of it and that’s just an extra (significant) level of care he has over her physically. And yes it’s also in the way he stays so close to her and the way he looks at her with the eyebrows doing */\* thing 🥹

When I said the other day that the thing I go softest over is their utmost and constant care of each other, well also way up there is their love for dancing together. You just know they do- you don’t get a connection like their’s without loving it (T has now said a few times that for a long period of their career she didn’t *love* skating.. but I do believe she loved dancing and skating with him.. just not the sport of skating). So knowing it and being able to believe it is one thing but when it comes out- uncontrollably pours out of them like this it’s something else. The way after the spiral they are basically making each other laugh with how much they are enjoying themselves. Both unapologetically singing, how it seems to have left their stream of consciousness that this is a practice for the ..Olympics.. and not just dancing for fun. So many athletes competing at the olys- the majority know they are not competing for medals- they are there for a PB- time or score and to have fun, and I’m sure they try to soak in the experience as much as possible. For the potentially medaling athletes- the ones with a good chance or are expected to win- they are there to do a job and have a lot riding on their result- TS were the favourites in almost every competition they entered in their senior careers (except for the first couple years) and if not favourites they were never far from the top (never lower than 6th as seniors). They put their whole careers and legacy on the line with this comeback and this result mattered a lot to them, and to many others. So how intimidating must it have been for all the other teams on this practice- 2 low ranked teams, one mid-ranked and one potentially top 5/bronze contender team, to be on the ice with the greatest team in history- expected to take it all, all the pressure on them, to be having THIS MUCH FUN and enjoying themselves THIS MUCH. Being THIS good and having THIS MUCH FUN being THIS GOOD. And in writing this I’m just now remembering how they said (when they came back to competition) that when they were on their 2 year break they would go to comps and watch other teams be taking it so seriously and not seeming to be having fun, and when they came back they wanted that to be a priority. To enjoy it. And they even told each other before every (competitive/performance) skate (but I’m sure everyday in practice too) that they are so lucky to have each other and love what they share and just have so much fun spending their days together and want to enjoy every minute of it.. (Scott- or I guess Tessa, can I please borrow that bucket the rice was in to soak up my tears, please and thank you). 😭😭😭😭😭

Part 1

Part 2

Part 3

#I’ll finish it there #part 3 to follow #I actually forgot how much I enjoyed writing essay posts #I havnt done it in a while and I want to get back to it #need to find some time management skills somewhere 🔎#anyway.. enjoy some weekend reading #2/17 practice #part 2 #thank you all for being patient with me

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okthatsgreat · 8 months

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new opddmh updates..... like. three of them. crazy. haven't been keeping up as well as usual (acting stuff and work tag teaming my free time and absolutely destroying it) but i have finally started to binge and i truly truly love what u r doing w makoto and miu. so different but still connecting on an in-depth level and balancing eachother out ....... sometimes a relationship is an ex-reality show killing game figurehead and the world's worst teenager fresh out of the hospital against the world. do u have any insights on the way u write relationships and connections or just them in specific that come to mind bc oh my god. please do tell

HELLO AGAIN :]!!! AND HAHAHAH THATS ALL GOOD ive been so busy also FINGERS CROSSED IM ABLE TO GET MY UPDATE SCHEDULE ON TRACK LOL

TALKING ABOUT THIS FIC!!! :] big ole ramble down below lol

(i use the word "partner" a lot here but just know i am not referring to strictly romantic relationships lol)

OHHH GOD. relationship writing advice HMM HMMMMM. it really is very complex bc there are SO many different types of relationships that can be written about ghfdgjh so advice definitely varies!!! i think something helpful that i've learned is that unless you are purposefully examining power dynamics it always helps to view both sides as fully realised characters. very very rarely do you want to have a character who is solely there to agree with their second half and have no personality or history outside of this. i see this happen a LOT with romantic pairings but it's also an important note for platonic pairings as well!! ESPECIALLY if the main focus of the story is on this specific pairing-- it shouldnt feel like one person is a human being while the other is a cardboard cutout whose only purpose is to be there for their partner. again there ARE a few exceptions to this and how it is portrayed but its the main rule i like to stick to!! :]

if i feel like ive written a character who is solely there for their partner something immediate i go to is giving both characters something that separates them!! most of the time this includes fleshing out a backstory thats different from their partner, that might influence the way they see things within the narrative. give them a different hobby, maybe a different friend group! give them a different perspective on the events that are unfolding, a different way of coping that might not be beneficial to their partner!! and remember that it is OKAY for them to not agree on everything!!!! do not be frightened into thinking you need every single relationship in your story to be perfect and unproblematic and completely agreeable, especially for longer narratives that call for conflict

OH AND IN REGARDS TO FANFICTION... piece of advice i try to follow is donttttt try to mold characters into entirely different people just so they can stay happy and agreeable with their partner lol. if theres tension theres tension!! if theyre petty then theyre petty!!!!! even if there isnt conflict and youre writing fluff, you dont have to erase their personalities just to fit them together as a happy couple! sometimes the challenge in writing comes from finding what happiness means for that specific character/pairing, and that may be very different from the typical idea of romance/happiness!!

AND NOW ON TO MAKOTO AND MIU first of all. i am so sorry for making you read paragraphs upon paragraphs of me just rambling nonsense at you GHFDKGSH BUT I APPRECIATE IT!!! and second of all this technicallllyyyy is advice i guess but its WAY more specific now!!! lol

anyways when it comes to writing their relationship most of their dynamic is based off of their differences! opddmh miu is brash and loud, and even though she is trying more and more to filter what she says she still speaks before she thinks and grows restless very easily. opddmh makoto on the other hand cant afford to be brash and loud and thinks quite a lot before he says anything, and is lot visibly calmer. so its fun examining how their differences are able to influence the other throughout the fic!!!! miu NEEDED that calming influence considering the state she was in when makoto found her, i quite frankly have no idea where the hell she would be now if makoto hadnt been so patient and understanding ghfdksghkf. makoto on the other hand is a man chained down by responsibility, so much so that his life has become extremely dull in his eyes just because of how repetitive it has started to become. miu is a serious change to this and offers him some kind of purpose while also reminding him of not only how SCARED he was as a teenager first exiting the simulator but also how unrestrained he had been before the years went by. theres a balance there!!!

but at the same time, there ARE some similarities. theyre both a bit paranoid, and even if miu is more willing to be vocal about her distaste theyre both scared of danganronpa as a company. they also both strive for some kind of peace, even if they have different versions of it-- makoto wishes to be unburdened by the weight of responsibility and his Ultimate Hope persona while miu wishes for stability in her relationships with others, even if she just isnt the best at it. its why i like writing small moments such as the two of them just sitting in the car and chatting or the most recent moment where theyre not talking at all but are still comfortable in each others company-- they dont explicitly tell the other that theyre super happy and at peace but they both subconsciously understand :)

OKAY CUTTING MYSELF OFF!!!! GFHDGFDJ THANK YOU SO SO MUCH <33

#ask lee #kozuelovemail #opddmh

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mukamibabe · 2 years

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edit: i’m a dumbass and have been calling this the fluff alphabet. it,, is not the fluff alphabet. at least, i don’t think so? anyways lol here’s my take on the sfw alphabet for: the man the myth the legend i hate myself im so sorry i’m writing this at 3 am ruki! mukami!

so without further ado, here’s ruki mukami’s sfw alphabet. you’re welcome. or sorry, lol.

A = Affection (How affectionate are they? How do they show affection?)

so, ruki.. ruki isn’t the most affectionate at first glance but it’s there.

his affection shines through subtle, smaller actions, and he has a lot of ways when it comes to showing affection.

for example, his brothers. perhaps not physically, but it can be very clear that ruki has an affection towards his brothers. with his brothers, he shows his affection and appreciation for them by simply caring for them, doing things for them and spending time with them.

for ruki’s s/o, you know you’ve made it into ruki’s heart once he starts treating you the same way he treats his brothers.

of course, being his s/o, or livestock, there are some differences but i’ll get into that now.

he isn’t big on physical touch, especially early on in relationships. once that trust has been developed, and once he’s gotten over himself, he’s a lot more likely to initiate physical intimacy, and will be somewhat okay receiving it.

for ruki, i think actions speak louder than words, and he likes to think he practices what he preaches. i guess it just depends what his s/o considers to be affection?

he’s very willing to shower you in (his own version) of affection if you are worthy of it.

if you are, then yes, you’ll frequently see a ruki who shows his affection through things like quality time and acts of service. those two things are more frequent than physical touch, for ruki at least.

that’s not to say he won’t ever feel physically affectionate. it’s rare, but not impossible.

other small physical ways ruki shows his affection towards someone is just by touching them, whether that’s just him resting his hand on you, pulling you into a surprise embrace, giving you a chaste kiss right on the forehead, or something.

physical affection is always something he loves to tease his s/o with. he loves to get his s/o flushed and if simple touches can do that, he’ll definitely catch you by surprise from time to time.

B = Best friend (What would they be like as a best friend?)

ruki isn’t one to just.. let people into his life like that, so, like being his s/o, if you manage to befriend him, like actually become his best friend or one of his closest friends, props to you, honestly.

it would take a lot of time, and i mean a lot. but worth it? definitely. i think he could be a really good friend.

he’s the type of friend who will always tell you the truth, even if it’s blunt and hurtful, and is also someone you can always rely on

if there’s one thing ruki is, it’s loyal, so if you’re a close friend of his, it’ll be a close bond.

he’s also the best at giving advice. this man has advice for anything and everything, so as a friend of his, he’d always have some sort of advice for you.

he might seem like a distant friend, but he does keep in contact with his friend/s often, but probably not daily. he’s a busy man with things to do. but, that makes the time spent with one another more valuable, right?

also, in order to be close to ruki, you have to go through his bros first, lol.

it’s not that hard, honestly. they trust ruki’s opinions and if ruki is friends with someone, they trust his judgement.

that being said, if you’re ruki’s best friend, you’re probably frequently invited over to his place. it’s like an open invitation sort of thing? i would say you’d always be welcome but that’s a little big of an exaggeration.

omg, you both can start a book club. or at least a two-person book club lol.

a requirement if you’re to be a friend of ruki’s : you have to appreciate his hobbies.

you don’t care for reading? ruki will make you like it.

you don’t know how to cook? no? you do now. same with whether or not you like cooking, lol.

he’s not pushy, per se, it’s just.. as i mentioned above, ,, quality time.

all in all, i’d have to rate best friend ruki 10/10. it’s incredibly hard to achieve because ruki doesn’t just let people in, but once you’re close enough, as a best friend, he really might treat you as good as he does his brothers.

C = Cuddles (Do they like to cuddle? How would they cuddle?)

LOL no. ruki cuddles are extremely rare.

there are a few things that might lead to a cuddle. first, i would probably say something bad happened and either his s/o or, though very unlikely, ruki needs comforting.

also, another thing that might sound hard to believe is that cuddles are more likely to be initiated by his s/o rather than himself. honestly you just have to test the waters to see if you’re allowed to or not.

similarly to the affection bit, you need to be worthy of it. sure, if you beg him enough he might. it’s just simply not for him.

physical affection is great, as is physical intimacy, it’s just.. he’s not a cuddler.

in the rare moments in which cuddles do happen, you better savor it. seriously.

he’s letting his guard down, despite 99% likely being the big spoon, and you get to witness him be vulnerable and free of worry for a bit. don’t get too comfortable with it though.

also, i feel like if anything, he’s more likely to cuddle while he’s asleep. he’s a light sleeper, so he’d realize like ‘oh oops’ but maybe,,,, just maybe if he likes you enough, he’ll pretend to be asleep still. especially if you’re still sleeping.

if you awaken because of him subconsciously cuddling up to you, he’ll notice if you don’t make it known.

vampire senses, you know?? he just knows.

if that’s the case, .. you’re in for a night. i know this is the fluff alphabet, so i’m keeping it fluffy, but,, he’s gotta distract you somehow.

D = Domestic (Do they want to settle down? How are they around the house?)

so, ruki is pretty domestic with his bros. we know this. he’s very content with this, and i don’t think he’d have things any other way.

if you’re his s/o, you’re living with him, and that’s final. he doesn’t beat around the bush- you’re his livestock now, there’s no need for you to stay anywhere else.

in terms of settling down, however, i guess that depends?

it really isn’t something he’s ever fantasized about, or even shown interest in. ever. i think, even after he’s in a relationship with his s/o, he doesn’t like to entertain the idea of moving out and like.. idk, having kids, getting married ect.

i almost want to say ruki fears change, in fact, i think none of the mukami’s would be fond of changes, naturally. if a major change such as someone were to move out, it’d have to be introduced slowly, you know?

also, his brother’s would need to be at an arm’s length, if he were to settle down and move away.

by settling down, if you are referring to children, he wouldn’t rush it. if he is to have a child, fine. if not, fine. he’s neutral.

if his s/o wants to have children, they’ll have to take a lot of things into consideration.

in all honesty, as much as ruki loves his brothers, i think if ruki had a child, it’d be time to move on to another home. probably.?

so settling down can happen, but he’s not in a rush for it or anything. he’s content with his current life, and he’ll take whatever comes to him.

E = Ending (If they had to break up with their partner, how would they do it?)

oh boy.

this, on the other hand, has unfortunately been thought of more than once for ruki. is it anything against his s/o? no. it’s literally all him and his own personal issues.

as we know, he’s got major trust issues. it’s almost always never his s/o’s fault- they’ve done nothing wrong, it’s just that ruki knows he’s catching/caught feelings and doesn’t want to accept it.

so, um, yeah.

despite all of that! it’s not very likely, at all. even though he entertains the idea, it’s just.. not going to happen.

ruki, like the rest of the diaboys, has some yandere tendencies. with his entire view on your relationship being master/livestock, he’s not going to let you go easily. once ruki’s in any sort of relationship with you, he’s keeping you. for good. the only way out is by his own hands, at that point.

anyways, putting that aside, it’d be very unlikely for ruki to actually break up with somebody, really. if he’s let you into his life, he’s going to have control over you, now.

if, for whatever reason, he absolutely had to separate from his s/o, it definitely wouldn’t be the last time they see him. does he have better things to do? yes. but, this won’t stop him from inserting himself in their life.

in fact, again, if a breakup were to happen, he’d make sure you’d never forget about him, one way or another.

F = Fiance(e) (How do they feel about commitment? How quick would they want to get married?)

this goes hand in hand with the domestic one, as he is content with his life, he would say.

though, that’s not to say marriage isn’t in the cards for him because it definitely is! is it something he daydreams about? not at all, but once ruki has truly accepted the fact that he is in love with his s/o, he’d be okay with the idea of marriage.

at that point in his life, marriage is a good thing. a ceremonial practice that is proof of the love he and his partner share. if you were to ask him before developing such a relationship with his s/o? he’d be indifferent to marriage, maybe even seeing it as a stupid contract, if anything.

again, once he’s accepted his feelings, i think he’d be eager to plan out a proposal.

except, before that, he’d have to make sure his s/o would actually be.. like.. okay with a proposal. the idea of his s/o refusing sounds impossible to him, and he’d rather keep it that way- then again, if he thinks his s/o wouldn’t want to commit in that way, they probably wouldn’t be his s/o-he’d get rid of them if that were the case because any sign of commitment issues are a no-no.

after ruki is engaged to his s/o, he’s not in a rush but he’s also not delaying anything, either. he wants the day to be perfectly planned and suitable for both himself and his partner, so he’s willing to take as much time as needed.

G = Gentle (How gentle are they, both physically and emotionally?)

ok yeah lol i’m starting to realize this is not the alphabet for ruki. dsjfhsd

he can be gentle. it’s rare, and especially depends on the relationship and how much he trusts his s/o.

ruki isn’t one to fabricate things. he will be gentle if he sees it necessary, and again, if you are worthy of it.

i think ruki is more likely to be gentle in a physical manner as opposed to emotionally. perhaps ruki has noticed he’s been too rough with his livestock, and i repeat, if you’re deserving of it, he’ll make it up to you.

i can see this happening after especially rough nights, or like i said earlier as well, perhaps if something .. eventful has happened? and not in a good way. i mean like.. emotionally eventful. like, karl dying or something. idk

in a situation like that, where something negative has impacted him (or his s/o), he’d be more likely to let down his walls and share a moment with his s/o.

he enjoys holding his s/o’s hand, and just like.. cupping their cheeks with his hand. small physical representations of gentleness, i guess. like ruki himself, it’s a bit subtle.

H = Hugs (Do they like hugs? What are their hugs like?)

not really a hugger but if you beg hard enough.. he’ll consider it.

on a more serious note, he’s not a big hugger. physical touch isn’t his preferred way of showing affection. however, he doesn’t think hugs are awful.

because ruki hugs are so rare, it’s very enjoyable. despite the fact that he is a vampire, who’s body runs cold, the embrace would be warm and dare i say full of affection. intentionally? idk, maybe not, but the fact that ruki is hugging you should kind of reveal to you that this is a privilege, one that ruki wants you to appreciate, even if he won’t admit it.

again, because hugs from this vampire don’t happen often, he sometimes likes to surprise his s/o with a hug, just to see their reaction. this will happen probably later on into their relationship because as with all the diaboys, these relationships take time. a lot of it. to be with any of the diaboys, patience is a must.

I = I love you (How fast do they say the L-word?)

hmm... well, i imagine he’d try to avoid saying it for as long as he can. his view on love is not like some ordinary humans’. i don’t want to say he wouldn’t believe in love, but..

um.

anyways, he believes that the chances of people having actual truthful, loving relationships, aren’t very high. this applies to himself as well, considering one, he doesn’t trust easily, two, he has no reason for love, and three, he doesn’t want to fall in love. hence why, especially in the early stages of his relationship/s, he is adamant about the relationship he is in with you- he is your master, you are his livestock.

when he is ensuring this nature of the relationship, it’s a reminder to himself that he can’t fall in love.

so, if ruki were to fall in love with some one, it’d take him a long time to admit it.

i honestly think he’d prefer for his s/o to say it first, as well. i’m not entirely sure if he’d believe his s/o when they say that, because words mean little to ruki. which could be another reason why he’s so.. hesitant to drop the l-bomb, aside from the fact that he dreads to hear the words leave his mouth. ever.

he is as untrusting as he is stubborn. it’s partially a pride thing, too, i suppose.

when ruki does say it, though, it’s kind of ironic because he will play it off coolly, as he usually does, and act as if it wasn’t a big deal. which i mean, to him, it wasn’t saying the words, or even the meaning behind it, but rather just .. coming to accept it.

in the very rare event when he says it unintentionally, you’re in for a punishment. he has to distract you, after all. might even try to convince you that you were dreaming, lol

J = Jealousy (How jealous do they get? What do they do when they’re jealous?)

ruki is an extremely jealous man, he just knows how to hide it.

also, i guess this depends too whether or not you consider jealousy to be the same thing as possessiveness, because ruki is technically more possessive than jealous.

in all honesty, i think ruki knows better not to be jealous and knows for a fact, that his s/o knows more than anyone else to not even think of getting too close with anyone else.

that being said, we know how ruki reacts to his livestock, his prey being drank from. again, whether you consider this jealousy or him staking his claim on his s/o, that’s up to you.

when ruki feels this way, of course, he must show everyone their places. if someone is getting to friendly with his livestock, he’ll make it known that they’re out of line.

there’s multiple ways he could go about doing that: verbally threatening them, or giving them a warning,

or! showing some good ol pda.

the latter will be especially more likely to happen if he’s really feeling uncomfortable with whoever it is that is interacting with his s/o.

it’s one thing for him to witness you talking with someone- he’ll watch, to make sure you stay in place, but if the person starts getting within a foot of your distance, he’ll swoop in and steal you away, putting on a show.

it’s definitely different compared to what you’d be used to. ruki can be a passionate lover, but pda isn’t something he takes part in often.

i also think it depends on who is coming onto you. if it’s some mere human, whatever. not a big deal, he’ll just come in, pull you close to him and wrap his arm around your waist.

if it’s someone like a fellow vampire, he gets a bit more.. passionate. i wouldn’t doubt him to be bold enough to pull you into a deep kiss, showing who you belong to.

K = Kisses (What are their kisses like? Where do they like to kiss you? Where do they like to be kissed?)

ah, speaking of kisses!

,,,ruki kisses.. 😩 BAHAHA thinking about it makes me melt

he has a lot of different meanings behind his kisses, if that makes sense.

there’s the one where it’s just a delicate little kiss, possibly to tease you, or possibly just for show

i can imagine ruki teasing his s/o by giving them the smallest, lamest kisses just to hear them beg, or maybe even pout, lol. he’d get such a kick out of it.

there’s also the kisses where he’s just caught up in a moment of passion, or is perhaps just overcome by his urges. those types will escalate, for sure.

then, there’s the kiss that is just.. straight up full of love. really puts his heart into it, somehow.

a lot of it depends on the context, but again.. ruki kisses,,,,, 🥴

another thing he sometimes likes to do is like.. kiss you before he basically impales you. or after biting you. or both.

not necessarily about kisses but he loves catching his s/o off guard. hence why he enjoys kissing you softly, leaving you to anticipate his bite.

he’ll kiss his s/o anywhere, he’s not picky, but, as i mentioned, sometimes chaste forehead kisses are fun, just to get a rise out of you

i think, other than the lips, one of his favorite spots to kiss his s/o would be on their neck. or, more specifically, the nape of the neck. he feels as if it leaves his s/o in such a vulnerable position and i mean.. it’d hurt pretty bad to get bitten there so, woo~ anticipation~

in terms of where ruki would like to be kissed.. let me tell you a secret. i think he’d really enjoy being kissed, a lot more than he’d let on. he doesn’t appreciate his own fondness for it, but..~

i think ruki’s favorite type of kisses from his s/o is the needy, heated type of kiss. one of his favorite things about his s/o is the fact that he knows he’s got the upper hand over them, if that makes sense? so if physical pleasure is one way to keep his livestock under his finger, then so be it. it’s not like he doesn’t enjoy it, either.

kiss him desperately, he’ll melt a bit. he’s a master at playing things off, so you wont notice it, but internally.. it riles him up quite a bit.

other than that, any other kisses are fine. and because it’s ruki, i almost want to bring up the idea of kissing his scars, but you’d need trust level 1 million for that, honestly.

oh, and JFDHFDS sorry i can’t keep things super fluffy apparently but if you ever get the chance, kiss ruki’s neck. that’s all i’m saying. or his collarbone, or something. just do it. you won’t regret it.

L = Little ones (How are they around children?)

i like to think that all of the mukami’s have a soft spot for children, ruki included.

is he more gentle towards children, yes, but he thinks it’s important for children to know the realities of life. he won’t act any different towards children, but he is a bit more approachable towards them.

like, he does like kids, and i think he would like to have his own, or care for a child at some point in time. ruki truly believes he could raise someone who could grow up to be a very successful person, and he’d take honor in knowing that. and it’d just be one more thing to boost his ego,,

for children in general, ruki treats them all the same. he’s definitely got a big brother type of attitude, but he’s got enough strictness that like.. a mother would. or a father, idk parents vary ok lol

yeah there’s not much to say other than he’s not mean to children, and is in fact rather friendly, it just, i guess depends on the child?

the childlike innocence is admirable, but the dark part of him (or realist, honestly) would rather have them know like.. life isn’t all that great. but, if it’s not his kid, why should he try to parent them??

anyways yeah kids are cool. like, if there’s a kid who needs help or anything and is completely just. lost at a mall or something, i can see him like.. helping the kid get back to their parents. he’d do that.

M = Morning (How are mornings spent with them?)

despite being a vampire, ruki is an early bird. unless you wake up very early as well, ruki typically is out of bed before his s/o and is already up and running, making breakfast, most likely.

honestly, i can’t really picture him sleeping in at all, for some reason. i mean, it’d probably happen, rarely, because ??how can you avoid that yknow

maybe after a night full of nightmares and being up and out of bed every hour, sure, he might sleep in.

there might be some spontaneous moves from him, too. i can picture ruki sometimes, if he’s in a particularly good mood, will wake his s/o up gently, maybe waking them up with a little nibble to their ear or something lol

it also might not be surprising for him to wake his s/o up to eat so their food doesn’t get cold, but i think that depends on who he’s in a relationship with.

or!!! maybe if he’s feeling a bit mischievous or something,, especially if he knows his s/o’s not a morning person,, he might wake his s/o up just for fun, lol

or maybe he wakes his s/o up for a drink,, or maybe it’s to get up and be his sweet little sous chef for the morning

N = Night (How are nights spent with them?)

keeping this apart of the fluff alphabet,, nights with ruki either go one way or another- quiet and just. straight to bed, or the literal opposite.

often times, he likes to drink from his prey before going to sleep because there’s nothing better than going to bed on a full stomach, right? ruki thinks so, at least.

i would say ruki goes to sleep at a relatively normal time, giving himself enough free time after dinner and then idk, time for bed i guess.

as his livestock, his prey, as well as his s/o, he would prefer to sleep with you. the only times he wont is if he’s having a rough night, perhaps with thoughts from his past that keep reoccurring to him, or something like that. maybe he’d be having one of his moments where he just wants to push people away, something like that.

but yeah, typically nights are very quiet with him. if he’s intent on sleeping, let him sleep. he’s not going to try anything unless he’s having troubles falling asleep.

O = Open (When would they start revealing things about themselves? Do they say everything all at once or wait a while to reveal things slowly?)

one of the things ruki despises the most is pity. show any pity towards him and you’ll be in your grave. or, headed there. he can be nice enough to give a warning.

this probably doesn’t come to a surprise, but ruki will hold off on telling anyone about his past for as much as he can, and there are multiple reasons for this.

one, why would his past be anyone else but his business?

two, the past is the past. ruki is who ruki is, and his past has nothing to do with anything.

to which i say, yes it kinda does bro but i’ll keep my mouth shut ♥

so yeah, if his s/o is curious about it, give him time. he won’t give you all the details but he’ll tell you everything to sate your curiosity. but, he won’t be giving all this information for free, either, so you better make sure you know what you’re in for.

in the meantime, don’t even dare to try and figure things out about his past. ruki likes to believe he’s in control of what you do and don’t know, and if it involves his history, you will know of it when he wants you to.

otherwise, there’s no reason for you to know.

honestly, i think he’d be more open about his past at the orphanage rather than everything that happened before the orphanage. the only details you’d get would be shitty mom, shitty father, and, humble ruki admitting he was an aristocratic brat.

P = Patience (How easily angered are they?)

it can take a lot to really upset ruki. and i mean a lot.

for trivial things like petty arguments, he’s used to it. or, maybe his livestock wants to act up? he can deal with that.

while ruki is a very patient man, there are few things that can really set him off.

i think, the biggest two, would be when he actually feels like there’s a threat near, meaning either he feels threatened by someone or feels as if they are going to harm his brothers, if that makes sense?

and then, his past. it’s a sensitive subject for him, we know. treading around this topic in general with ruki is very dangerous because he can get set off by what might seem like the tiniest things, but this isn’t exactly the case.

ruki is just really good at holding in his emotions and it’s rare to truly see him upset, and when he is upset, he takes it out on others. not his brothers, but most likely to the one who angered him in the first place.

with ruki, you don’t really have to worry about pissing him off unless you’re intentionally doing it. and if you are, he’ll make you regret it, if he hasn’t kill you already. as i’ve said, sometimes he’s nice enough to just give warnings.

Q = Quizzes (How much would they remember about you? Do they remember every little detail you mention in passing, or do they kind of forget everything?)

ruki will know you better than you know yourself. hell, he might even know you more than he knows himself. he’s got outstanding memory, as to be expected of someone like him.

and, ruki, with his possessive and sometimes yandere tendencies, yes, of course he should know you very personally.

a lot of the information it’s like?? okay ruki how did you find this out?? that’s a secret. and, frankly, not one you need to worry about. what, do you think ruki will use it against you? either way, it doesn’t matter. you’re his. he’ll do what he pleases.

he’s very good at remembering details, and is even better at remembering how to react and respond to specific things.

he takes a lot of it to mind, and usually will use it to his advantage in some way. for example, if he catches you staring at, say, something in the window while walking down a street with him, he’ll pick up on it, and he’ll definitely remember it.

it’s one of his many benefits for being so observant. and he’s like this with everyone, honestly. he likes to be able to remember what triggers certain people and how certain people respond to various things. in this case, i am definitely referring to the sakamaki’s.

anyways, this can be sweet for his s/o because oh, nice, ruki remembers that i don’t really care for this, or ruki noticed that i have a preference for this color and blah blah blah. it shows, especially when ruki is rewarding you in some sort of way.

however, this is also terrible for his s/o because he also can figure out quickly exactly what you dislike. and, being the sadist he is, he has not much of an issue with this. for example, say you’ve got a pretty big fear of like.. something. anything. ruki can and will use this against you. he also remembers things like where you’re most sensitive, where you hurt the most, ect.

R = Remember (What is their favorite moment in your relationship?)

ruki’s favorite moments in a relationship would probably be... hmmmm

probably the little things. the little sweet moments where you’re all together, like you, him and the rest of his brothers. he values his brothers a lot, obviously, so to see those two things combine, it’s a good feeling.

other than that, again, little things. it could be just something like the two of you sharing a quiet morning, sitting down and eating breakfast with each other, something like that.

also, ruki really loves to teach. professor!ruki moment?? JFDhds as his s/o, though, he’s going to teach you a lot of things. both intentionally and unintentionally. like, as i mentioned earlier, if you don’t know how to cook, he’s going to teach you.

i can also picture him teaching his s/o to ballroom dance, because that’s . .a common trope. but one i can definitely picture ruki doing and enjoying.

idk really when i say he likes spending time with his s/o, i mean it. it doesn’t matter what they’re doing, he just likes being there with them and he’ll treasure it, for sure.

S = Security (How protective are they? How would they protect you?)

super protective, if that wasn’t obvious.

and while earlier on in the relationship, this might be true- he doesn’t actually care what happens to you, but.. he does. he covers it up though by saying he’s only protective of you because that’s the responsibility he should have, being your master.

that’s really all i can say, honestly. it’s a lie, especially later on as he starts to actually care for his livestock

it’d honestly be very reassuring, though, because as long as you are under ruki’s care, he will protect you with his life. because ‘that’s what a good master does’.

cough cough, ok ruki.

the only one who can harm you is himself. though, it won’t be too bad as long as you follow his rules.

once again, i would like to point out how loyal ruki is, and it definitely applies to how he would protect his loved ones. including his s/o. he will protect with everything he’s got, and will do as much as he can to prevent you from getting in harm’s way that isn’t coming from him.

T = Try (How much effort would they put into dates, anniversaries, gifts, everyday tasks?)

regarding everyday tasks, it’d be just as much as he usually does? in the mukami household, while he does cook for everyone else, each brother is to do their own respective cleaning. if a mess is made, that brother is to clean it up. ruki, being a great big bro probably does do some other things for his brothers such as laundry, but other than that and cooking, idk.

anyways, this would all apply to his s/o as well. while ruki does do a lot, his s/o must put in effort for something,, at least as much as his brothers do. he doesn’t want to be in a relationship with someone with the same amount of energy as the eldest sakamaki.

in regards to like.. dates and stuff, they happen. frequently, actually. and, of course, the three words i’ve said so many times throughout this entire alphabet- if his s/o deserves it. this is just something ruki lives by, okay?

ruki will schedule dates with his s/o often, at least once a month if they’ve been good. sometimes they’re a bit fancy, sometimes they’re not. the idea behind the dates itself is the fact that it’s something he’s actually planned out- other than that, he’ll sometimes invite you to join him somewhere just for the fun of it.

gifts are never super extravagant- not because he can’t afford it, he can, but simply because he doesn’t prefer it? he prefers giving his s/o gifts that have more meaning behind it, if that makes sense.

sometimes he also gives gifts for his own pleasure, too. for example, i wouldn’t doubt that ruki has once gifted his s/o like.. a collar, or something.

actually, ruki doesn’t mind giving gifts to his s/o because he enjoys the fact that everything he gives to his s/o is a reminder of who she belongs to.

while this wouldn’t be a requirement for ruki, i think he’d be pleasantly surprised if his s/o did anything like giving him gifts or inviting him out on a date. he’d enjoy it, literally only because of the effort and thought his s/o put into it. it makes him feel good, you know?

U = Ugly (What would be some bad habits of theirs?)

wellllll,l,, um. this should be obvious. HAHA i almost feel bad for wanting to list all the bad things about ruki because i have a lot to list.

i mean,,, apart from he being a bit of an egomaniac (sure, it’s arguable bc he doesn’t act like ayato, but still), he’s lowkey a bully (but obviously we’re into that bc this is dl) um. he’s a bit insane. but anyways JHJHSD sorry ruki 🙏

pushing aside all of the obvious traits and habits of ruki’s,,,

sometimes he can get caught up with himself and his own duties. such as? tbh i have no idea sfsddf only thing i can think of is if karlheinz is still alive, he is still dedicated to karl. though,, after the adam & eve thing it gets kinda complicated but whatever. he’s always at karl’s beck and call.

um.... uhhhh

idk honestly he’s a pretty decent guy if you ignore how unstable he is. i guess another bad habit of his would be how unpredictable he is??

also, i’d like to point out as well that ruki doesn’t think of any of these of bad habits and i think that may be why i’m struggling a bit, other than the fact that in the games, ruki shows us the ugliest sides of him so it’s like.. ok

umm overly possessive?

weird s&m dynamic but again, this is dl.

has some yandere-like tendencies but, surprise, this is dl. we’re into that i guess

idk honestly lol i have so many 😤 bad things to say about this dude but i wont

V = Vanity (How concerned are they with their looks?)

he’s not like kou. he’s not going to cry if he’s having a bad hair day or anything. BUT. tell me if you can even imagine ruki looking slightly.. idk.. messy.

because i can’t. i’d like to, but the only time i think you’d catch him disheveled is after,,,, certain events.

i don’t want to say he’s obsessed with his appearance, but he does care. not only will it hurt his pride if he doesn’t look presentable, he likes to come off as a put together guy.

that’s honestly it, really. he’s not going to fuss about anything but he wants himself to look good at all times.

W = Whole (Would they feel incomplete without you?)

hm... this one’s tough. it definitely depends on who he’s in a relationship with, and how.. close the relationship is.

and honestly writing this feels like i’m exposing him HFDSHH this would be a super personal question for ruki. because, you guessed it, his pride, his trust issues, and just ,,,, a whole lot of problems-

and, of course, he wouldn’t admit this, or at least want to, and probably only would in a life or death situation ,, im exaggerating a bit but like he would too ok??

now, to say whether he’d feel ‘incomplete’ without his s/o.. well, that sounds.. dramatic. in my opinion and probably ruki’s opinion, too-

i actually think.. ‘empty’ would probably be a better word?

then again, it depends. if you’re his s/o and have been with him for a while and if he’s truly bonded with his partner, then yeah.

while livestock can be replaced, ruki, unfortunately for him, does grow particular fondness towards them. i mean, even if he looks at his livestock as simply nothing but a meal, humans are different from one another, always.

anyways, i guess what i can say is that ruki.. probably wouldn’t go straight back to his usual self, without his s/o? there’d be a sort of loneliness type of vibe just.. surrounding him. the only way he’ll feel that way though is if his s/o’s dead, however. goes missing? he’ll search forever, mark his words. it’s honestly almost.. endearing how much he’d to just to keep his hands on you.

X - Xtra (Random HC)

since ruki has been in a relationship with his s/o, you might notice that he’s been more open to trying new things. the thing is, he makes you do it with him, whether that be like.. idk a pottery class, or maybe like. picnics lol. since he’s been in a relationship with you (even if it’s not like.. a relationship-relationship if you get me), he’s felt a little more adventurous and eager to try things out with his partner. also just thought of like.. ice skating, too, so that’s cute.

hm,,.. here, i’ll steal one based on my sims gameplay with the mukamis: he enjoys cross-stitching.

speaking of sims, i think, for whatever reason, ruki would have a knack for interior design. is also super talented with writing, he’d have a really macabre type of writing style.

kou once painted ruki’s nails black and he had the hardest time getting it off. why would ruki allow that? well, first, he’s gotta keep up that 😎 epic cool big bro status, and also kou probably practically begged him. his excuse would be “to see what the color looks like”. while this may have been true, ruki knows that kou could do it to himself, but honestly it wasn’t a big deal. it was a nice bonding time, ruki loves his brothers and i love that for them. i can picture him wearing gloves for a few days until finally getting them off- and what’s even better is that he refused to ask kou for help.

also wow when this said random i really am just like. throwing out headcanons, so here’s some more.

as a child, ruki was definitely one of those kids who were anti vegetables. it is, most likely a trait he will pass onto his own, lol.

another thing kou has made ruki do is playing video games. aand join social media. if he did have a public account, i can picture him also having a private one that he actually uses. he’s not a social media addict, and in fact, he rarely uses it but.. on occasion. has probably gotten karl hooked on twitter or something JSDFSH oh, and the video game thing; yeah no.

except.. he hates to admit it but smartphones really are a beautiful thing. i wish i could say he plays candy crush in his spare time, but no. too easy for him, and also he’d be way too annoyed by it.

Z = Zzz (What is a sleep habit of theirs?)

a lot of the times before ruki actually falls asleep, he might sit up and read for a bit, or maybe have a warm drink. and, as his s/o, who, whether you wanted to or not, have been turned into his new bed warmer, ssdfjhsdfs

also, we know ruki has nightmares. as his s/o, if you weren’t aware already, he has nightmares. and, like a normal person, he doesn’t love them.

if you are with him after he wakes from a nightmare, he’ll either want to take his mind off of it somehow, or, want comfort. will he admit that? hell no. BIG NO. pity is one of the things he hates the most, even if it’s unintentional.

if you wake up from it, which i mean.. you might if you’re a light sleeper, but ruki during his nightmares isn’t like.. screaming or anything. you’ll hear some noises, and see his face clench up sometimes, and he’ll be shifting around more than usual as well, so.. if those wake you up, sorry but like. ruki doesn’t care. be grateful that he even allowed you to witness that, even though like. .it wasn’t intentional, but whatever. ruki logic.

yeah um if you do wake up for it, he’ll know. and he’ll then use you as a way to shift his thoughts away from his dream.

if you’re not awake and remain sound asleep, it kind of depends.. he might get up, he might just lay there, or maybe he’ll wake you up, maybe with gentle, teasing touches.