#james brotherfucker potter
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regulus meeting james the first time: *awkward blinks*
james: *whispering to sirius* is he can speak?
sirius: yes, but in a very specific manner
james: what do you mea...
regulus: *trying to say hi* fuck off
james: oh *smiles* nice one
sirius: told you
#regulus is so baby#little motherfucker#james brotherfucker potter#sirius told you black#marauders#marauders era#marauders fandom#sirius black#regulus black#james potter#jegulus#starchaser#sirius and regulus#sirius and james
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Sirius: God fuck my brother 🙄
James: I wouldn't call myself a God but-
Sirius: what
James: what
#marauders#james potter#jegulus#regulus black#sirius black#remus lupin#wolfstar#marauders harry potter#james brotherfucker potter#protective sirius black
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There are some recurrent jokes in the Marauders fandom that will never not be funny to me:
The Sirius serious joke? Has me wheezing every time
James Brotherfucker Potter? Golden
Any animal related joke? I’ll be on the floor laughing
The McDonald jokes? Priceless
#marauders#ao3#regulus black#sirius black#ao3 fanfic#harry potter#remus lupin#fic#just lovers#wolfstar#mary mcdonald#marauder joke#marauders incorrect quotes#james brotherfucker potter
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Sirius after James told him he's dating a boy: Oh! You've got to tell me all about it!
Sirius after he found out who the 'boy' is: don't tell me anything, I don't wanna hear how you corrupted my innocent baby brother.
#he was horrified#“you brotherfucker”#i'm traumatized#regulus black#james potter#jegulus#sirius black#drama queen#i love him#the black brothers#such sweethearts#remus lupin#wolfstar#marauders#ao3
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James: I just want to impress you with something!
Regulus: Why? Im already in love with you
James: What did you just say?
Regulus: *realises what he said* Nothing.
James: *grinning* Really? Because it sounds like you just said you loved me
Regulus: *proceeds to hex james*
#regulus is mean#argue with the wall#embrace delusion#jegulus#regulus black#james potter#marauders#james brotherfucking potter#marauders era#james x regulus#wolfstar#dead gay wizards#i have an unhealthy obsession#with harry potters parents#and yes regulus is one of Harry's parents#no lily slander#im in love with her honestly#lily evans
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*Sirius finding out about starchaser.*
*Pointing at James*: BROTHERFUCKER
*Pointing at Regulus*: SON OF A BITCH
-
#lgbtqia#starchaser#the marauders#romance#jegulus#james loves regulus#james x regulus#james potter#sirius being sirius#sirius and regulus#sirius and james#i love the black brothers more than i love myself#brotherfucker#son of a bitch
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James: Hey, I just met you!
Sirius: And this is crazy!
Peter: But here's my number!
Remus: So call me maybe!
Regulus (from James'bed): SHUT THE FUCK UP, IT'S 2 AM!!!
Sirius: Regulus?*Realise* JAMES, YOU BROTHERFUCKER...
#marauders#regulus black#james potter#sirius black#remus lupin#peter pettigrew#jegulus#it's how it went and nobody can change my mind#marauders era#sirius calling james “brotherfucker”#a normal night for them
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From @jegulus-microfic prompt | 287 words
Birthmark
It was a sunny yet chilly day. The four friends sat outside underneath a tree. Remus was sitting against the trunk, book in hand. Pete was laying on the grass, eyes closed but not fully asleep. Sirius was sketching and lastly, James was facing the sun, looking at nature in silence.
Prongs picked up a leaf and chuckled "Looks like Reg's birthmark."
"What did you say?" Grey eyes lifted from the paper.
"The leaf." He held it up. "Looks like Regulus's birthmark." He hadn't yet realised the horrible mistake he had made.
"How do you know about his birthmark?" Uh oh. Black's more serious (pun intended) tone peaked Wormtail's interest, waking up from his semi nap.
"Uh… Quidditch…" He tried his best to sound convincing, but it was to no avail.
"James. The birthmark is on his butt. I will ask you again. How do you know about it?"
"Uhm, you know Pads, it's- it's a funny story." Potter chuckled nervously and looked at his friends. Moony was shaking his head, predicting what would happen in less than a minute. Wormy was curious, there hadn't been much drama at Hogwarts lately. "You see… I- well… Regulus- We… We're dating. I uh… I was going to tell you, I just… Didn't know how to bring it up to you…"
Padfoot took a bit before answering, his gaze neutral. Who knew what was going through his mind? "Five."
"Five? Five what?"
"Four." Potter's eyes widened and he jumped to his feet. It was a fucking countdown to his death. He was too young to die.
"Run Prongs!" The tanned boy was already sprinting when Pettigrew shouted.
"Three… Two… One. JAMES FLEAMONT POTTER, YOU BROTHERFUCKER! I'M GOING TO KILL YOU!"
#marauders#marauders era#the marauders#marauders fandom#harry potter marauders#marauders fanfiction#dead gay wizards#james potter#jegulus#starchaser#sunseeker#regulus x james#marauders fic#I will never not use brotherfucker
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Sirius: walks in on Jegulus
James:
Regulus:
James: I can expla-
Sirius: BROTHERFUCKER
#marauders#atyd marauders#harry potter#james fleamont potter#jegulus#regulus arcturus black#sirius black#sirius being sirius#james being james#james x regulus#regulus black#brotherfucker
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sirius *looks at james who has a different neck tie on his neck which has a lot of hickeys on it.*: well, prongs? had a great adventure last night that ur neck is full of mosquitoes’ bites? and why is ur clothes so messy? AND— WTF?!
james *carefully sitting far from sirius*: ha ha ha, ah yes. went on an adventure last night. bloody mosquitoes bit me...
Remus *feeling sleepy, leaning on Sirius’ shoulder*: ah right, when did Regulus became a mosquito?
sirius: JAMES FUCKING POTTER—?
james: wait—! I CAN EXPLAIN—!
sirius: YOU BROTHERFUCKER—!
(also when sirius started chasing james with his shoe, remus fell on the table, now his head has a bump on it, completely baffled why sirius is chasing james when its actually his fault)
#sirius being sirius#remus lupin#regulus black#all the young dudes#regulus is so mean#marauders#starchaser#james & peter & remus & sirius#wolfstar#dead gay wizards#sirius loves remus#sirius chasing james with his shoe#james ‘brotherfucker’ potter#incorrect marauders quotes#i love them
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Sirius calling James "brotherfucker" is so funny to me
#regulus black#james potter#jegulus#sirius black#marauders era#marauders#starchaser#wolfstar#slytherin skittles#brotherfucker#prongs#padfoot
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for @jegulus-microfic’s prompt champagne, july 30, w/c 321
Regulus slowly walks up the stairs to the bedroom. James knows this because his footsteps echo as he moves through the house.
James sits up slowly, grabbing his glasses and placing them on his face, world immediately clearer. He hears the footsteps stop directly outside the door, and then a pause of about a minute. Then, a tentative knock.
James calls out a quick “Come in!” And turns toward the door, straightening out the rumpled duvet. Regulus walks in, looking like a dog who’d done something bad and come back with his tail between his legs. James normally played that role in the relationship, so it was different seeing Regulus look like that.
“Sorry.” Regulus mumbles. James looks at him attentively, waiting for him to continue. “I- it was shitty of me not to tell you.” James gives a nod, for no other reason then pettiness.
“And I know Barty wouldn’t have told. But- yeah, I should’ve told you.” Regulus pauses, and James begins to speak.
“I mean, it’s like you expected us to pop a bottle of fucking champagne. Then just move on.” Regulus hung his head, knowing it was true. “And- what was that whole “I didn’t asked to be saved shit?” James adds.
“Not my fault you have a savior complex!” Regulus snaps, face flushed. James just narrows his eyes.
“Okay. Sorry. I just meant, well… I dunno what I meant. I didn’t think. Sorry.” Regulus adds.
“Stop apologizing,” James mumbles. “Sorry as well. For, y’know, snapping at you and such. I was just annoyed.”
Regulus gives a small smile, but he stays in the doorway. James knows it’s a result of his upbringing, the way he never feels as though anything really belongs to him. “C’mere, darling,” James says in a soft voice, drawing Regulus to him when he’s close enough.
He combs his hand through his lovers’ curls, snuggling him to his chest, in comfortable silence.
#marauders era#james potter#regulus black#jegulus#starchaser#james and regulus#james loves regulus#james brotherfucking potter#regulus x james
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I think Sirius would be 100% supportive of the love of his life and baby brother's (his words not mine) relationship. However, the man is literally, the most dramatic human being to ever grace the world with his presence. Do not sit here and try to tell me he wouldn't make a big deal out of it at first, like c'mon.
*Sirius walks in on jegulus making out*
Sirius: -GASP- you..I..him..with my...WHAT THE ACTUAL FUCK
James: Sirius it's not what it looks like okay..
Sirius: not what it..not what it looks like?!?! Really prongs cause to me it looks like you're FUCKING MY BABY BROTHER you..you, BROTHERFUCKER!
James: Well we're not necessarily fucking-
Regulus: yet
livid Sirius: 😐😑😐😑😐💢💢
flustered James: 😳🤯🫣
Remus walking in: huh...
Sirius: I'm gonna kill him-
Remus: which one?
Sirius: I dunno yet, stay tuned
Regulus: 🙄🙄
James: 😨😨
#regulus black#james potter#jegulus#sirius black#remus lupin#marauders#marauders harry potter#wolfstar#protective sirius black#brotherfucker james potter#supportive siruis black#sirius is a drama queen#regulus is a little shit#this is so funny to me#i cant help myself
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Y/n: Hey Papa, what was you're reaction when you found out uncle reg and uncle James were dating?
Sirius, lies: well I was very surprised, for sure, but I handled the situation very well.
~what really happened~
Sirius, walks inside his dorm: So I was thinking-
James and Regulus both on James's bed in the middle of a make out:
Sirius:
James:
Regulus:
Sirius: JAMES! YOU BROTHERFUCKER! *Starts to run at James*
James: *running for his life* MOONY! PLEASE STOP HIM!
Remus who's known about Jegulus for months: No, you're on your own. *Laughs as he watches the chaos*
#jegulus#james x regulus#james potter#regulus black#the brotherfucker#sirius black#remus lupin#wolfstar#marauders#moony#padfoot#prongs#remus loves sirius#moony x padfoot#remus x sirius#sirius loves remus#good luck james#youre definitely on your own
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Sirius after a fight with Regulus: Fuck my brother, honestly!
James looking smug: yeah *cough* fuck your brother.
#a few months later#“you brotherfucker”#“you said fuck your brother!”#“i didn't mean literally!”#james potter#regulus black#jegulus#sirius black#black brothers#the black brothers#black family#starchaser#sunseeker#james fleamont potter#james x regulus#regulus arcturus black#sirius orion black
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Pandora: does he even know you like him?
Regulus: Ive tried ignoring him, I've tried being mean to him
Regulus: at this point i dont know what else i can do
#marauders#jegulus#james potter#marauders era#regulus black#james brotherfucking potter#sunseeker#pandora rosier#pandora#pandora lestrange#pandora lovegood#dead gay wizards#starchaser
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