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#instead of doing what im doing now when im actually poor and stressed bc they can choose to cut me off anytime

via-l0ve · 6 months

Note

OMG UR MIKE SCHMIDT HCS ARE PERFECT!!!!!!!!! pls do a part two 🙏🙏

(btw can I be 😾 anon? )

Dating Mike Schmidt Hcs PT. 2!❣️

a/n: ABSOLUTELY!!! thank you sm 😾 anon <3 i love u! this also includes just some general head cannons of him because he’s my baby.

warnings: nothing :)

mike drinks coffee and energy drinks all the time

his favorite flavor of monster is the original or the Strawberry dreams

if you like monster (i’m an addict) he buys you one every time he buys one for himself

when he was working at freddy’s you’d patch him up if he ever got hurt :(

you teach him how to bake so he can teach Abby

You’re the only person Abby likes her brother to be with

she incorporates you into her drawings after a while of knowing you

mike is so happy when he sees you drawn in because his sister’s approval means a lot to him even if she’s only ten

it takes a while for mike to open up to you

but when he does he kinda has to break it up into small bits

he’s surprised when you hug him and comfort him bc what no one’s ever done that before

his love language is most definitely words of affirmation and physical touch

mike is so stressed with his work schedule so he can’t always be there physically but he always, without fail, every. day. sends you a good morning and good night text.

that might not seem like much but it’s everything to me okay!!!!

“hey baby, good morning :) i love you the most and i hope you have an amazing day. im on my way to work now but when i get out ill text you and when i get home ill give you lots of kisses. i love you.”

that’s so fucking cute

you guys have frequent date nights that just consist of laying on the couch or in his bed and watching a movie while he lays on your lap or on your chest

Abby usually interrupts because she “can’t sleep” but we all know it’s just because she wants to watch the movie

Mike secretly has a savings account for the two of you

he wants the best for you and when he can give you the world he will

but for right now he’ll pay for some stuff and give you kisses afterwards

he makes playlists that remind him of you

he loves to give you his clothes

or, if you don’t want those, he gives you blankets of his that smell like him

Mike notices the little things

like if you told him a story about your cousin and how they pissed you off

and then you brought them up again

he would remember the incident but he wouldn’t remember their name

“oh isn’t that the cousin who did all of that stuff to you?”

you guys have deep talks at 2am while he lays on your stomach and you comb through his hair with your fingers and you guys just talk and make out

his lips are soft but his hands aren’t

you definitely flirt with him all the time to make him blush

he hates feet

like everyone wears socks in his house or he will shoot his eyes out

he also hates canned corn

don’t ask me why i think this is just do

he’s scared of being alone

he also most definitely uses “:) :( :/ .-.” instead of actual emojis

he laughs at all of your jokes

even if they’re just not funny

he dosent want you to get sad lol

he’s always scared he’s not enough for you

he works a lot and he’s constantly tired and he makes minimum wage so it’s not like he can take you out to fancy dates or anything

he opens up about how he feels and when you tell him how much you adore your little mundane activities he gets all teary eyed and just hugs you so tight

:(((

he just wants to be the best version of himself for you

he adores you

off topic - he’s a lightweight when he drinks

he’ll stumble into the house drunk and just clinging onto you like a sloth

poor baby

he just deserves the world

#love u mwah #thank you sm for this request #😾 anon #mike schimdt x reader #mike schmidt #mike schmidt headcanons #i love this man #fnaf movie #fnaf #josh hutcherson #josh hutcherson characters

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lostbutincognito · 2 months

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i dont follow u here but i followed u back before downsizin , but i like to come to ur blog to get other perspectives when my dash is being dramatic, and its always VERY good points abt VERY true things, like recently with wilbur - not defending him but pointing out both the fixation on him as 'evil' rather than uplifting shubble, and the subsequent dehumanization- i dont get tons of it on my dash but get enough to be glad to have somewhere with . a different perspective so I dont get stuck in the gunk of fandom . and then i saw ppl talking abt qsmp melting, so i rolled by here to see an Actual perspective instead of . the wider fandom , and its still banger points - the double standards and the very very valid question.of . who the hell are these 'higher ups' . this is quackitys smp . who is 'actually' in charge.? and i didnt hear ANYTHING abt 'we need money or qsmp will be shut down' bc that is an absolutely RANCID thing to say and im gonna go . look into where that statement is from lol to see how sugarcoated or whatever it is (if u have like a source or whatever ? like did someone stream or post ? ill hunt it down either way lol) and i cant . HELLO.... 'give us money or we shut down' WHAT THE HELL HAPPENED TO ALL THE MONEY YOUVE BEEN MAKING? what kinda corporate hellscape bs .... uagh . why would u make a project u cant support on your own ? relying on viewers for money to keep this thing going with so many people involved? theres no way theres not enough money if this is an honest thing . ok im gonna go look at stuff but its annoying as hell ty for perspective on things my dash can be . bad abt <3

so I want to be clear this is what I was referencing:

it's not a direct 'give us money or we shut down' but I've already seen people begging Q to sell more qsmp merch so they can support the server which is exactly what I knew was going to happen lol. 'if I don't have money to cover the project the project will end' is a very sensible approach (how else do you want to run a project after all? by not paying the people lol?) but it's also a clear signal to the fanbase, fully conscious or not.

and I am not saying there's anything wrong with wanting to support the project you're passionate about as a fan! but there is something to be said about the business decisions being made in the quackland, considering there's already issues with current merch he's selling never being delivered and the fact that, well, again. if he never noticed people working for him were not compensated AND apparently he said that he's already losing money on the qsmp (I don't have direct source for this one I heard this from my friends)...well. where's the money going man. are people scamming you behind your back, are you this negligent to not know what's going on in your own companies, or are you lying to everyone to cover your own ass?

*sigh*

here's the thing. q is evidently under stupid amounts of stress and we have seen this ever since he started ghosting everyone and pivoted the qsmp from the original vision as presented to us in the beautifully animated intro video to the low quality 'hi we're a worldwide server now' announcement. we don't know why that is, despite the obvious things we can assume. and on a human level I am concerned for him. on any other level than that, well, I just have to ask WHAT IN THE FRESHEST OF HELLS WERE YOU DOING THIS WHOLE YEAR TO LET THINGS COME TO THIS YOU POOR EXCUSE OF A BUSINESSMAN.

#anonylost #also this was such a nice message wtf thank u #the quote is from q's stream tonight

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natsmagi · 1 year

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(future au anon) OKAY BE READY BC IT'S VERY ANGSTY me and my friend loves angst wayy too much lol

So uh first of all tw suicide :')

Yeah hum i guess you can guess where it went with that

Basically Tsumugi unalived himself yeah-

Which traumatized Natsume and their daughter, Marisa (i was the one who made her!) pretty hard and now they're suuuper overprotective of eachother in fear anything happens to the others like calling each other VERY often Marisa would even get late to practice sometimes (bc ofc most kids are idols too and with time we decided ES accepted girls and other genders too) and Marisa often sleep at home too instead of the ES dorms and like if Anything remotely bad happens to his daughter Natsume would go MAD

It also affected Marisa personality a lot since she was pretty young when that happened so now she's SUPER parano and anxious about her loved ones wellbeing and like she would cling to her friends a lot and always ask them if they're okay bc she always worries they ever..you know. Do what Tsumugi did

Also Marisa is a big nerd (is that the term) she's super into books, animes/mangas, games and such and also a looot into the magic stuff her dad does teehee she also likes drawing and i like to imagine she's the one designing her unit clothes

ANYWAY but its time i actually explain why Tsumugi did what he did. So uh very basically me and my friend decided Eichi died of his illness to give the Wataei family angst which well ended with ES in a MESS since Eichi is like. An important figure in it yk. And so Tsumugi as he now became President of NewDi OR WHATEVER YOU CALL IT got super stressed and pressured with stuff (also grief of Eichi dying) and also with time the idol industry became much more strict and uh. Overworking? Idk how to explain but uh yeah all that was just too much for poor Mugi

It might be ooc idk,,but i decided to not have any mercy to the Eccentrics in this au (i mean do we have mercy on anyone really) and so uh oopsies Natsume i took ur husband away

Damn i ended up rambling a lot sorry i got excited,,i love this au i lot i would love to tell u more if ur ever interested?? :')

IM ??????? WELL THAT WAS NOT WHAT I WAS EXPECTING THATS FOR SURE

BUT IT IS A REALLY INTERESTING PREMISE........ im not the angstiest guy myself sorry im a big fan of happiness and joy and love but id say this is a very good foundation for the story ur telling from what im hearing !! and given the circumstances of everything i can see these events taking place....... BUT I CANT STOP THINKING ABT THE EMOTIONAL TURMOIL NATSUME WOULD GO THROUGH. like given everything theyve been through, all their promises together, baby tsumugi vowing "lets become happy together, you and me" to natsume-chan when they were kids, now even forming a family together, thinking theyve gotten their happy ending, only for the man he loves to then take his own life due to stress and anguish. im very fixated on the feeling of "i wasnt enough/i didnt do enough" natsume would be suffering through. the amount of regret he'd face. maybe wishing he'd been nicer to tsumugi. had put in more effort. given him a stronger sense of love and security while he had the chance, but now hes gone and the only memory he has left of him is marisa. This au sure is getting the brain juices pumping THATS FOR SURE

#cw suicide #AND YOU CAN TELL ME MORE IF YOU WANT TO IT SOUNDS INTERESTING!!#again though i love my angst with a happy ending if anything. gotta have the pain be worth it in the end for me #that said though anything can work so long as the premise is good and u DO have a solid one......... u should definitely expand on it!!!#ask

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juni-ravenhall · 2 years

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i’ve been trying to figure out what to do, bc the more im away from ssoblr the more it became obvious that i feel intensely fucking shit when i go on here and feel better when im not on here

- due to the ppl who decided to make shit up about me behind my back and then double down on it and say “look!! he IS mean [for being hurt and upset - as a longterm victim of abuse and bullying, which everyone knows about]” when i try to talk about that.

i just dont know what to do. i liked it here, and i did my best (as someone with severe social anxiety and with ptsd from abuse! i’m not perfect, but i did my best!) to talk to ppl directly, even the ones who have been rude or nonsensical or mean or whatever other form of disrespectful to other ppl. (that includes anons i received and normal convos.)

but everytime i go on here now im just reminded about how ppl i thought i could trust would turn on me and make shit up about me instead of actually talk to me, and when i tried to talk to them directly, it would be shut down or discouraged. while the behind-my-back stuff clearly was never actually acknowledged or resolved.

at this point i just feel so lost. i dont know what to do. when i try to resolve it instead i get told even worse things and got hurt *more* instead of getting a resolution. and i get told “you talk too much” and shit like this, so what? talking isn’t bad. treating others unfairly is bad. i wish i had a penny for everytime someone told me i talk too much! imagine, humans are different! talking isn’t harmful and when i was told to “stop replying to me if you don’t agree”, i did, aka i stopped talking, as much as i feel it’s an odd way to handle things.

even my gf got grouped in with me as if she had done something wrong. what exactly these things we both did that are wrong, seems really unclear. i know that ppl got upset about specific things but i don’t really see how the things are wrong, and if nobody is ready to explain that, what can i do? what am i supposed to do? when *i* see someone post unfair or mean things, i replied to them and said “hey, this isn’t fair” etc... but the same group of people told me to stop doing that. (either by direct words, or by blocking me, or whatever.)

what do you want me to do then? to not reply when someone is mean, but also to think it’s okay for people to talk about me in private chats, and therefore to not get a chance myself to explain or defend myself since you refuse to talk to me directly about it? i hate all of this. it’s school style bullying at the point that you talk about others negatively in private and don’t have anyone there to offer a different perspective or defend them.

i didnt talk about any of these ppl behind anyone’s back: part of what made some ppl mad is the public posts i made (during panic attacks from severe mental illness and stressful poor life situations!) containing ~narcissistic judgmental mean content~ such as “i can’t handle ppl being irrational and mean”, or “people should stop being irrational and mean”, or “people should get help (just like i do) if they’re unhealthy and immature”.

bc you know, it’s not like ppl were irrational and mean to me or others, i just made that up. and it’s definitely only about x persons on ssoblr who likes to think all vagues are about them and not the entire humanity (aka: ive been open about how many ppl have mistreated, abused or bullied me, actually, and every fucking time i go in a fandom i meet ppl who latch on to me as an easy target bc im Different. one person being immature or unhealthy isn’t unique; i meet them everywhere; if they treat others with disrespect or unfairly they are causing harm, no matter how common they are, and therefore it’d be great if they tried to fix that by studying psychology and getting mental healthcare. because it’s not okay to hurt others or be mean and you should stop. whoops, am i being a mean narcissist again?)

i really wish all the trying-to-talk-it-out happened publically because i needed backup. they can keep doing what they do and everyone else thinks they didn’t hurt anyone because i handled this in private out of respect (i don’t believe in cancelling and blocking and all this shit). if nobody knows what happened then they’re also free to keep manipulating the perspective and act as if i really did do something wrong (i’ve asked what i did wrong and i get no answer. contrary to Things People Make Up About Me, i actually do want to know if i did something wrong, and try to make it right - and no, you’re not unique if you Made Things Up About Me, so that’s not just about one person, yet again).

it’s not comparable to say “you’re talking too much” vs “you hurt me”. it’s not comparable to say “you wrote public posts where you said being mean and irrational is bad” vs “talking behind someone’s back in a private space where they or their friends can’t defend them”. the things aren’t the same. you can’t just act like all emotional reactions are equal when they’re not.

i really dont know what to do. i dont feel safe or comfortable on here, i feel like shit that they hurt me like this and are still hellbent on that somehow it was my own fault and also it never happened anyway.

(btw, i was literally told “we talk about you sooo much” and then told “no, we never talk about you”... “he thinks ppl talk about him”... as if i was being delusional or grasping in thin air, for putting together two and two when i know for a fact i had been talked about *and* i don’t see any other explanation than talking-behind-my-back for how some of the rude/mean things even reached me the way they did. anons that mysteriously sound exactly like the people who were being rude/mean and part of the same group? ppl replying to me just to be rude who supposedly don’t even follow me - i’d guess my posts were being linked somewhere? i mean, it’s not a far reach when you know it’s all one same group of people that do talk to each other in private where nobody can speak for me. i’m open to other explanations, but i haven’t been given any.)

also, to be clear because ppl love to make shit up about me:

i dont talk about any of this to insult or shame or whatever. i already talked directly to ppl from the very beginning and talked publically about my opinions and thoughts and this is what made them upset.

i talk about this because im fucking lost and ssoblr is my only “big” fandom community. i’m really sad to think about leaving, like really really sad. i just don’t know what else to do when the people who hurt me are still here and still acting as if i did something wrong, but not ready to talk to me about it respectfully.

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golbrocklovely · 2 years

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I fully agree with you, if he hasnt walked a mile in another person’s shoes, someone who hasnt had it easy, hasnt lived a life of privileged or had that cushion where he knew if he fucked up he could easily move back with mom and dad, then he has no right to tell people how it is and how its supposed to be based on what he’s read off self help books. Its not like he spent years helping malnourished children in a extremely poor part of the world and went “wow these people with so little still manage to be happy by doing this”, no he bought philosophy for dummies and ran with it.

Personally i think the people that preach the most like he does are trying to convince themselves they are happy, so they go on these rants and spiels trying to convince people it should be like this or that because that is how their life is currently like and because they really aren’t happy. Not to sound like a jerk because i’d kill to have that life where i can be my own boss, follow my own schedule, and my biggest headache is “i need to edit & film” and not “how the fuck am i going to pay rent”, but Sam is over here complaining about editing all the time and how “its starting to feel like work”, yeah im not gonna feel bad for you buddy when you’ve had the means to hire editors and a team, no one told you to disassociate from friends or move and buy A second mansion and just abandon the first one. His issues are rich people problems and for him to have the audacity to say we shouldn’t put all our joy into vacationing!!! When the majority of us cant afford to travel every other week like him is absurd.

The same way Colby gets called out for the littlest things, i WISH someone would call him out and tell him if he feels like ranting to go to a therapist first and then if he still can’t scratch that itch, to actually take the time to get out of his comfort zone and learn about people and society instead of being so generalized with his thinking.

i don't think he would have to go that far to understand struggle. but i do think weirdly he can come across with a lack of empathy. i think he genuinely cares, but i don't think he fully grasps how bad some ppl have it. hell, even i to some extent don't. but bc my lows have been deadly to some extent, i care for those who have struggled more than me, bc i could barely make it thru.

and you nailed it right on the head. i think internally he struggles to find himself, to find things that make him happy, and bc of that, he tries to project this air of "i'm so happy and you can be just like me if you follow along." and it's just… not realistic.

i personally believe that regardless of life circumstance, you can still bitch about how life feels. even they have bad days. my issue is that maybe venting to us isn't the best way to go about it. go vent to your influencer friends who understand you gripe. i will say tho, when they do complain, they also immediately follow it up with "but we don't really have all that much to complain about" so… win some lose some lol

but i do get your point that they could easily hire someone to help take the stress of editing out of their life, but instead don't forever whatever reason bc they want someone they can mold into the perfect editor for them.

side note, and not related to this at all, on xplrclub they talked about how they might be hiring this one editor who's gonna basically do sam's half (or at least help out with that half) and i'm just like…. WHY THAT HALF??? they bitch constantly that they don't want anything flashy that a lot of editors do now-a-days, so clearly they want control on the back end of the editing. why not just hiring someone to cut the video up and make it make sense, and then the two of them can split between the music, subtitles, transitions, ect???? that would be SO much easier. also i basically said at this point they should just hire a fan to edit bc even i at this point could make a video like theirs lol

anyway back to your ask

oh yeah, when he talked about not living for things like vacation and trying to find happiness or positivity in the mundane, i get it. but like…. wrong messenger. you can actually afford a vacation. some of us can't and will never be able to. so like, if we some how miraculously can, shut the fuck up and let me enjoy it sksksks

highkey i would love for snc to both go to a therapist. like, i just know they need one. we all do tbh. but at least they can afford to go to one.

#ask #personal

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makeusfreefromthisfandom · 3 years

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Haikyuu Boys As Your Barista

feat. Hinata, Kageyama, Bokuto, Akaashi, Kuroo, Tendou, Atsumu

A/n: who knows might make this a series as well. lmk other characters you’d like to see

Part 2

Hinata

You walk into the store and see a little boy jumping up and down behind the counter, chatting with the other employees

Is he even old enough to be working here? Is he the one who’s been having too much caffeine? Are your first thoughts as you walk up front

He spots you and arrives at the counter with a huge, bright smile

Good luck if your order is complicated...he can’t retain this much information at once

The barista beside him will have to help him out like 😐

Sputters out a thousand apologies

When he brings you your order, chances are he’ll trip and spill the drink all over your shirt

Freaks out. If the whole cafe hadn’t know what had happened, well they do now...

Runs behind the counter and comes back out with the whole box of napkins and begins to frantically help you out with your mess

You tell him it’s ok and he doesn’t stop until you give him a little peck on his cheek

He just shuts down then

A very eventful afternoon, but honestly he made your day

Kageyama

He’s a simple guy

But gets your orders right.

Like he’s precise.

very precise.

with the amount of milk, coffee, additions, etc

Kinda just stands there staring at you even after he’s given you your drink

And your like ????

And he’s like >: }

He just wants to know how he did on your drink 😭😭😭

Like assurance and approval, asking you if you could taste everything or if your drink felt like it was missing something

Poor boy is hard on himself so if you give him a genuine compliment it will make his day >>>>> and he’ll work 10x as harder

Protect barista kageyams 😭

Bokuto

Energetic af!!

His goal is to brighten everyone’s day so the second he hears the bell of the glass door as someone enters, you don’t get a “hi, welcome to (cafe name)” you get a “HEY HEY HEYYYY”

Yet another barista who arrives at the counter with a huge smile 🥰

Accidentally gets your order wrong 😭

BUT YOU STILL TAKE IT BC HE PUT HIS ENTIRE HEART AND SOUL INTO THAT DRINK AND HES SO PROUD

HE EVEN DRAWS A LITTLE SMILEY FACE ON YOUR CUP

Akaashi

Akaashi is literally the coffee shop aesthetic

He’s so calm

Remembers your usual by heart and already has a knowing smile when you enter the cafe

Or if you feel like trying something new, the guy is full of recommendations that he thinks you’ll like

Let’s you in on the secret menu items

If he sees that you’re having a particularly bad or stressful day, he’ll always make sure to write a compliment or some type of motivation on your cup 🥺

He’ll just write a compliment everytime in general, regardless

He’s genuinely just a good person.

Never fails to make your day ❤️

Kuroo

Ok but imagine kuroo in a Starbucks visor>>>

Here’s a guy who thinks he’s being slick

He’s the type to do the whole “on the house” thing

Like giving you an extra pump of caramel or wtv you put in your drink for no extra charge

Wont ever just put his number on the cup

Nah he’s being the nerd he is and writing some cheesy chemistry pick up line or smth

It actually began when you started coming in as a regular, Kuroo would write a science joke on your cup when he saw you a bit down

He wanted to see your smile 🥺

From then, it became a thing and one day he felt bold enough to finally make a move with a pick up line

He’ll probably write something like “chemists do it on the table periodically”

OK OK IM SO SORRY THIS IS SUPPOSED TO BE SFW

“Are you a carbon sample? Because I want to date you”

Something like that hehe

And how could you say no to such a cute little dork 🥰🥰

Tendou

I also see him wearing those visors haha

Lowkey the type to judge your orders and remember them

And you can tell he’s doing that too 😭

Like the next time you visit the cafe again, he’ll take a minute to stare at you before he pops up and is like

“Oh! You’re that person that puts____ in their coffee!”

No shame in calling you out 😭

But that’s just how he is, there’s no bad intentions :b

He finds you interesting ok?

He might recommend something else instead

No shame in self promos either 😭

Atsumu

Why. Is. He. So. Loud.

You just want your drink man, you didn’t sign up to literally watch your barista yell at the coffee brewer because it wasn’t working

Calls for Osamu to take care of it so he can go back to flirting with you

He’s kinda like Kuroo in a sense, except he’ll be a lot more straightforward and bold about what he’s writing on your cup

Like literally just his number and a “call me”

Or “yer hot”

Ahaha

Winks, tipping his visor at you as you walk out the door

Taglist: @glitchedover @natsuya-enthusiast @allieturs @syrenblubs @todominica @kkbear @thatfreeshit @lowkeystasha @animatedarchives @cha0tically0rganized @ourfallenthoughts @akaashirin @ever4wolf (let me know if you would like to be added or removed!)

#haikyuu #haikyuu!!#haikyuu x reader #hinata x reader #kageyama x reader #bokuto x reader #akaashi x reader #kuroo x reader #tendou x reader #atsumu x reader #haikyuu fluff #haikyuu headcanons #hq imagines

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ao3gingerswag · 2 years

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adding on to @ao3time 's ask about sam being punished (who btw is a v v good author I already had multiple of their series bookmarked and didn't even realise so im totally gonna hype them up very awesome), I think cas actually trying to punish/be an authoritative figure towards sam would be quite the journey in itself. bc like thinking about it he himself is barely if at all an adult, and moreover his only experience of authority is *his* father, which is its own kettle of fish what with cas's autism and the general stresses of being a single parent with that kind of job (speaking of, tangent, what's the back story on cas's mother if you've thought of one?), so basically poor cas is probably very stressed with trying to figure out how to deal with sam while also trying to not upset dean and everything's a big mess. maybe sends sam to the room like his dad did for him as a good thing to help him with his sensory overload? so then when he comes and finds sam has disappeared probably leads to a lot of guilt/angst as he worries he's not capable enough to deal with others emotions :'( poor cas

also another little side note ASKS ABOUT KYIS ARE WELCOMED??? cos boy oh boy has that fic taken up enough brain space and hours of my life for me to have far and away enough thoughts to probably right a whole other fic in itself. I havent sent any before bc I wasn't sure if you wanted to focus on it rather than wander home and didn't want to add more things to your already crowded head, but rest assured I have asks in the plenty!

Ok @hooomdooom 1. Asks about KYIS are ABSOLUTELY welcome!!! I love Wander Home but truth is KYIS will always be my pride and joy 😭❤️ that was the manifesto I think had been developing inside me since I was like 10 and idk if I’ll ever be more proud of anything else I create in my life. I’m honestly more proud of completing that fic then getting my masters degree 😭😭

2. My idea/backstory about Cas’s mom is not super developed, but I think I implied somewhere in one of the fics that she up and dipped when she realized that Something Was Wrong with her kid 😭 and that Cas’s dad always told Cas she died in childbirth but he kind of knows that that’s not true bc he was old enough to sooort of remember what happened (like 4 or something)

3. I Agree about what ur saying about cas being an authority figure I mean he’s like. Only 6 years older than Sam so. He’s really like another older brother and even that just barely. And honestly for the most part I think Sam just listens to dean. Like he’s very compulsively defiant but I think for the most part he very much does listen to dean bc he knows dean loves him so if Dean says don’t go near the big stream by yourself he doesn’t go near the big stream by himself. EVEN if he thinks dean is being ridiculous and he’s not gonna somehow fall in. Like….he doesn’t want to give Dean more to worry about so he listens. And He loves dean very much. 🥺🥺 I think really the only things he didn’t listen to dean about were like things about DEANs safety and happiness. Like. Dean would be like sam Do Not pickpocket the creepy men who come into the inn to try to give me more money to meet Johns Requirements! And Sam would be like uuuuh request denied. But now he doesn’t have to worry about stuff like that really so he doesn’t HAVE to disobey dean to like try to get him food and stuff. So him listening is not actually much of an issue anymore.

I think the only time something would happen where cas would have to intervene would be 1. If Dean were not around for some reason or 2. If Sam had some sort of meltdown and started shouting at dean 😭 which tbh I can see happening he’s a very traumatized disturbed little kid he’s bound to crack up once and a while. But Dean would just cry instead of standing up for himself like a regular kid so cas would have to be like Sam!!! Go To Your Room!!! And Sam would storm off and maybe go or maybe not and THAT would be a whole thing. But yes. These r my thoughts. I have a lot of them.

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grizztheexplorer · 4 years

Text

Ep 10!!!!! Love Victor live reaction:

-finally!!!! Never thought i would be rooting for the dad but here i am. I hateeee he doesn’t trust Isabel nor that he wants to tell her to not do things. But i ain’t with Isabel equating what she did to him beating up Roger. Girl fuck Roger.

- I don’t need to watch further to KNOW someone heard Benji talk to Victor in the bathroom and I bet my ass it was Andrew bc drama

- I KNEW TAKE THIS HOMOPHOBIC ASS OUT OF HERE

-“whatever happens between us” are they gonna separate??? I thought before i started the show i saw a spoiler of divorce (hadn’t read why or anything) but i feel like if the separate for a while they could actually find their way back to each other??? I hope they try living apart and all for a while bc i do wanna root for them. Also i reallyyyyyy fucking hope she doesn’t get with Roger again s2. Like i said, FUCK that guy.

-okay is still fuck Andrew hours but AT LEAST him not even thinking of outing Victor gets him out my blacklist.

- TOO GOOD A GUY TO WALK AWAY FROM IM JUST GONNA GO CHOKE IM STRESSED

-LISTEN IK MIA IS STILL AN ISSUE HERE BUT VICTOR HAS BEEN SO REPRESSED AND SAD AND BENJI HAS HAD TO DEAL WITH DEREK BC THATS THE GAY GUY HE GOT AND LIKE G O D DEREK IS SUCH AN ASS DID U SEE BENJI’S FACE WHEN VICTOR WAS LISTING GOOD THINGS?? THEY BOTH DESERVE A CHANCE AT HAPPINESS IM CRYING

-also uh don’t think I didn’t hear Derek say “i feel weird at a high school dance” sir Benji ain’t a senior he’s a sophomore. Is Derek out of high school?? A college kid dating a sophomore in HS is🤢🤢AND he treats him badly??? Jail

-im crying🥺🥺🥺listening to Benji and Victor talk has also lowkey made me realize like even if they haven’t interacted as much Victor has allowed himself to be jusy a teen with Benji even if they have talked about heavy stuff. With Mia unknowingly he did the same with his parents. Showed her the version of him she wanted to see bc of guilt, fear, and in order to make her feel better. Victor has only been him with Benji (and with Felix) and wow. Didn’t notice until their talk and me starting to think back on the show. Perfect writing.

- is heartbreaking how Mia found out. I’m wondering if maybe she’ll be hurt but understand??? She’s a 15-16 year old smart girl. At that age i def saw cases like this and it always ends with the straight partners supporting the gay ones. Hell, a case EXACTLY like this happened my freshman year of HS. These really popular girl started dating this new kid and she was obsessed with him lowkey?? They broke up bc he came out and she was the most supportive. I understand she’s hurt bc he cheated, but i hope she listens to him and tries to understand like how hard it is for queer kids and how confused he was? Is heartbreaking bc he truly cares for her and im sure right she thinks he doesn’t and just used her. But i hope she’s willing to listen. As a queer person, I honestly understand all the shit Victor has done. Is not the best way to do it. But I don’t feel angry at him. I get it.

- ugh the song for that kiss was perfect tho🥺🥺

-omg I totally thought him talking to Mia would be a cliffhanger are they gonna have a confrontation now??? She’s still so raw😭😭 i want them to be besties noooo

-LAKE OMG GO OFF. Poor Wendy tho she was hyping herself up to ask Felix🥺

-THAT WAS SO CUTE FELIX AND LAKE ARE AT THE TOP OF THEIR GAME BC 🥺❤️

-lowkey Andrew didn’t try to intervene and instead got with Mia to take the opportunity but also im 1000% not surprised of the straight person not wanting to hear his side and instead taking the girl where they can be alone together 💀💀may I say though with their history i do not think Andrew and Mia should be alone together. She has feelings for him yes, but she already regrets having sex with him bc she was feeling vulnerable. He didn’t know it the first time but this time he know how she felt and how she is feeling now. So this time it is kinda taking advantage if he ends up having sex with her.

-Pilar girl i get it but also the queer romance life of ur brother is literally.... none of ur business and does NOT affect u the way ur parents’ relationships affect u. So please kindly stfu.

-thank Pilar hugged him back

-hell yeah Andrew said no. U still out the blacklist buddy good for u

-SIMON SAYING YOU’LL ALWAYS HAVE ME IS THE TIP THATS MAKING ME CRY AGAIN BC YES THAT GAY COLLEGE SQUAD IS ALWAYS THERE FOR U AND I HOPE WE SEE IT AGAIN S2

- :)))))))) that ending :))))))))

S2 thoughts:

- okay well a lot of truth bombs. I truly think separating was the right choice to get them back together in a healthy manner. That is if they don’t date other people. Roger will most likely make a comeback. She will most likely date him. Maybe she’ll realize what a shit bag he is when he does/says something dumb and realize Armando is it for her??? I hope at least i do wanna root for them

- im so proud of Victor🥺🥺 he told everything to Benji, and came to out Felix + his family. Ik things will be hard with Mia at first, and Andrew is still no saint so he might be a dick to him on the team once he is out (or might defend him) but at least they know too. I saw the writers saying s2 will be now about Benji and Victor learning to be in a relationship and Victor’s environment changing. Benji and him will def struggle in the department that Victor is still learning how to openly be himself and let himself be seen versus Benji already having dealt with that before. So it will prob be hard for Benji too. It’s exciting tho and i hope despite everything s2 is kind to them.

- backetball will be hard for Victor without a doubt. I really hope Bram and Simon come for holidays or something and we get to see them again. Maybe even meet Benji or Felix too that would be so🥺🥺🥺

- can’t tell how the parents will react. Ik he won’t be kicked out and certain things will he hard bc s2 is gonna be about them working it out for sure, but I can’t tell if at first they’ll go in complete denial or will just quietly ignore it or fully pretend to be supportive while they aren’t. I hope s2 shows us the end of that scene and how the reactions went and not just a time jump. We will most likely start with a time jump but i hope the first ep of s2 shows us the reaction through a flashback.

Overall: amazing actors. Really good writing. These were realistic characters who make dumb realistic choices and are heartfelt and down to earth. All the actors are amazing and bring so much to the table. The writing is great dropping small hints for things to come without it being screamed at your face so you aren’t surprised 100% by certain choices but also not completely expected. And it’s honest about teens’ journeys at that age with appropriate age actors (except for Andrew I haven’t looked at his age but motherfucker looks older then ME lmao). I can’t WAIT for s2 and again, leaving it to existence so it happens: LET SIMON AND BRAM HAVE A LIL EP WITH VICTOR AGAIN IN S2!!!!!!

#love victor

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uwumessenger · 4 years

Note

Since you watch ATLA can you write for the brothers with MC that gets their face stolen by Koh when that brother pisses him off? But let's say Diavolo helps MC get their face back later on so it's temporary and there's no need to worry much about MC never having a face again or anything 😳

that's sCARY AS HELL omg koh definitely scared the living shit out of me when i was a kid LMAO thank you for saying that diavolo helps mc get their face back bc if i would cry if mc straight up disappears bc dont his victims end up somewhere "between life and death" 😳😳 ANYWAY

Lucifer

lucifer was supposed to meet with koh numerous times but flaked each time ...eek

so koh stole ur face by popping in and scaring u 🙈

koh entered ur room undetected and unannounced so when lucifer walks into your room all he sees is a faceless mc

his instinct is to blame mammon but you somehow communicate to him that it wasnt his fault

he tells diavolo about it and when diavolo says he can help get ur face back within a week, relief sets in

he helps you with anything you need and makes sure the other 6 dont bother or bully you in any way

never tells you that the reason why ur face was stolen was bc he was missing his meetings w/ koh but from now on he's sure to never flake again

Mammon

somehow managed to steal a mask koh had that was made completely out of gold idk how he did it but he did

he dragged u w/ him and koh stole your face once he realized what happened he said aight mammon it's onsite i am lit rally a facestealer

when he first runs away he deadass forgets you cant see so he has to go back to grab you and gun it

straight to purgatory hall to ask solomon for help. when solomon says it's out of his control yall go to diavolo

panicpanicpanic

luckily lucifer wasnt with him ! diavolo says that he'll help you out

theres almost no way that mammon could hide you from lucifer for an entire week so he convinces diavolo to let you stay in his castle

checks in on you A LOT and once ur back to normal the whole stolen face thing becomes blackmail B)

Levi

idk what he'd do to set koh off. it'd probably be more like

hey mc, let's visit koh and ask him if he has any manga from back in his day

and then you accidentally chuckle when koh looks at u and now u have no face

levi nicknames you no face as in no face from spirited away and doesnt think much about the fact that you dont have a face until he realizes oh, you doNT HAVE A FACE

he actually tells lucifer instead of trying to hide behind his back and then yall go to diavolo for help

he ends up feeling really bad and checks in on you occasionally as ur confined to your room

after you get your face back he'll still poke fun at the situation and call u no face smh

Satan

accidentally summoned koh to his room (on a bad day for koh) but koh went after u instead. now ur face is gone

he searches all his books for spells that could at least give you a temporary face but alas, there is nothing

lucifer is doing a room check and that’s how ur found out...eue

satan confesses to summoning koh but everyone still has to listen to the four hour lecture anyway

he likes to read different urban legends to you in the weeks that you guys wait for diavolo to fix ur face

right before you get your face back he marches to koh’s residence and rocks the shit out of him as he should

Asmo

asmo simply wanted to see if it was possible to charm koh and take all the faces for himself!

until u showed disgust on ur face at the wrong time while watching asmo. 2 be fair it was too hard to not cringe!!!!!

he would then try to charm koh into giving ur face back but eventually gives up and takes you straight to diavolo

hes in TEARS because ur beautiful face was stolen and it was all his fault </3 poor bb

but he feels happier when diavolo says he will get ur face back!

in the meantime asmo will most definitely draw on your face. when you get it back he compares all the photos of his drawings to your actual face LOL

but he'd also feel pretty bad so he'd give u a fat hug and apologize haha

Beel

err here it'd be more like you wanted to visit koh but not alone so u bribed beel with food to get him to come with

and ur doing fine until beel starts to try eating in koh's house when koh said specifically no eating in his home 😡😡 im sorry this is turning silly i really dk what to do fbdndndnd

koh's reaction startles you, but before you can put a straight face back on, koh turns and sees ur emotion then steals ur face

surprisingly he doesnt capture beel's either bc his face looked like his soul left his body

hes not afraid to ask for help but tries asking levi and mammon first, then satan, then solomon, before asking lucifer if he or diavolo could do anything

in the week that you're faceless, he's mainly concerned about the fact that u have no mouth so u cant eat!! D:

he definitely tries feeding you dhdjdjjd and gets very stressed when the food doesnt get through to you

by the time you have your face back hes ready to eat a bunch of ur favorite foods and snacks with you !

and ofc apologizes for not being as strict with you. now it'll take a lot more than a dozen cheeseburgers to visit someone so powerful and dangerous like koh ✋🏻

Belphie

this guy definitely said some shit to koh back in the day

upon running into him again in public, koh decided he would get his revenge by stealing belphie's face!

it was a flop bc belphie naturally isnt too expressive BUT koh shocked u to ur bones so it was ur face that got stolen instead

immediately tries to hide you but tells beel about it. this guy already semi-successfully killed u once so the amount of trouble he'd be in for getting ur face stolen....WHEW

obviously it's next to impossible to hide you and beel felt sad that you couldnt eat or drink or talk so he ratted belphie out LMAO

and it was straight to diavolo since lucifer was with him

while ur faceless, nothing really changes. hes still pretty much the same but he does ask you if you need anything and will prevent you from falling off the bed or couch and all that

when you're back to normal he doesnt really apologize BCNSNSJS bc he technically didnt do anything wrong but he tells you that he feels really bad and will protect you better!!!!!

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msiopao · 4 years

Text

Taeseong with the Members

KOREAN BIG MINION

constantly teases joong with his height

joong keeps teasing him with his constant squinting

feeds into joong’s minion fascination and always buys anything minion tae sees

tae always calls him ‘appa’ and proves his point as joong is always having to drag him home from the studio

‘yah, enough with composing. the computer is making your eyesight worse’

calls joong ‘leader-nim’ and pesters him to death

‘leader-nim!’ ‘lEAdEr-Nim!’ ‘LEADER-NIM!’

‘wHAT tAESeoNg?!’

‘hi’

their long times in the studio made them really close and when tae gets into it, he GETS into IT

deep talks

the only person who can make tae open up

tae isnt emotional but tears up a little whenever joong reminds him that he’s always enough and completes ateez

‘min taeseong, im not talking to you as a leader, but as a brother. even when you think you’re dragging ateez down or lacking, you’re not. in fact, you always push us and you’re the glue that keeps us together. we are family and we never leave family behind.’

TOOTHLESS

tae always clings to hwa like a koala

calls him ‘eomma’

absolutely HATES tae’s smoking habits

‘YAH! MIN TAESEONG! if you’re going to smoke, do it away from the building!’

‘b-but, i’m in the,,,, balcony?’

‘get that AWAY FROM HERE, YOU HEAR?!’

helping hwa cook is tae and him’s bonding time

tae is constantly wowed by how handsome seonghwa is

number one seonghwa stan

favorite movie is How to Train Your Dragon because toothless looks like seonghwa

that one wave fancam of seonghwa?

tae has seen it millions of times

in their vlives, seonghwa is always seen patting tae’s head and runs his fingers through his hair

always the first one to notice that tae’s down and when he’s not talking, seonghwa tells joong immediately

‘taeseong-ie acts like he’s so cool and manly all the time but he’s actually the biggest softie i know.’

EMMA WATSON FANBOY

sat through the Harry Potter movies and Beauty and the Beast movies for Emma Watson

awkward line

clowns him a lot

‘uRi sAGuiLKKA?!’

‘istg child if you DONT STOP’

absolutely adores his birthmark

hates it when the makeup covers it because its precious and part of yeosang that’s being hidden from the world

‘first his lines now his beauty mark?’

they initially didnt get along since they both had kinda cold personalities but became close after that

tae loves to hear his voice and tae looks forward to the day that he gets more lines

yeosang tried to teach tae how to skate but tae just seems to never know how to balance

like seonghwa, tae gets so blown away with how beautiful yeosang is

tae tries not to stand between yeosang and seonghwa bc the amount of attractiveness and talent they radiate

‘we all have that but they just seem to radiate it more,, is it the increased handsomeness?’

tae always hugs him and stuff but cringes whenever yeosang so much as wraps an arm around his shoulders

‘seong is very weird. he loves to give affection but when its given back, he just has this face of discomfort. there’s no equality with him.’

HARRY POTTER STAN

harry potter fanboys

these two have Harry Potter marathons constantly

tae loves literature and books and finding someone else who likes harry potter in his group really made him happy

they’re the moodmakers of the group and are always hyper together

tae thinks mingi and yunho are the best dancers so he always tries his best to match to their level

both absolutely hate to wake up early and are by far the laziest members in the morning

poor san who has to wake them up and drag them out of bed

hides tae’s cigs and lighters and sometimes, throws them out

‘i swear i put it here. yunho, did you see it?’

*yunho shaking his head with an angelic innocent face*

tae’s not stupid tho so he knows it’s yunho throwing them out

ends up getting really angry w him and just,,,,

chaos

their room has a bunk and a twin bed and yunho sometimes steals tae’s bed and tae just letting him have it and sleep in the bottom bunk

kinda tiny so he loves wearing yunho’s sweaters

‘tae and I are very similar so we do the same things and share everything like our clothes and bed. he doesnt like it when another member does it but since we were classmates in school, he’s comfortable with me.’

MOUNTAIN

absolutely ADORES his smile

i mean,,, look at that

tae loves to poke his dimples and tae just breaks out into giggles when san tries to bite his finger

shiber is their adopted child

whenever tae or san is feeling down, a plushie fixes everything

thats why san has so many of them

1/3 of yutaesan room

the devil gang gang

it was san first and tae got really fascinated and tried to mimick him

ended up perfecting it

rip atiny

san’s low self-esteem always made tae sad so he is always telling him how perfect and talented he is

but san also tries to give it back which never works since tae is a witty little demon

perfect example:

‘how is the most beautiful person in the world today?’

‘i dont know, choi san, how are you today?’

*blubbering nonsense*

tae dies a little inside everytime choi san makes cute little noises

‘CHOI SAN, say purple again’

affection and skinship 24/7

‘if min taeseong was a girl, i’d marry him on the spot.’

ICANNOTENGLISHI

look how perfect this man is sjikfdhfjd

N E ways

this tol boi makes tae feel real intimidated and scared

when they first met, tae actually tried to distance himself from mingi

had this scary vibe and aura from him

but when mingi laughed and giggled after mingi made a sarcastic remark

it was over,,

tae used to love piggyback rides from him but stopped when he had a back problem

instead just constantly backhugs him

when they were in kq fellaz, tae always stayed behind w mingi to practice some more

tried to teach him english but gave up because mingi couldnt stop laughing at tae

‘the way you speak it is just so funny!’

as a fellow rapper, tae is constantly wowed with mingi and has this small smile whenever he raps

deep voice for D A Y S

in australia, tae went with him to get medicine and wanted to help him badly but was too busy laughing

another affection victim

‘i remember when tae was still this short little dude but now he’s almost my height. what have they been feeding them?’

GIGGLES

laughter and giggles 24/7

woo gives tae cheek kisses all the time and tae gags

but tae does the same thing to him

thinks grey-haired woo is the superior form of the perfection called jung wooyoung

shares the same adoration for BTS

while woo likes jimin, tae loves taehyung

the rare times that tae gets drunk, woo is the only one he listens to

‘yah, mingi, call wooyoung. he needs to get him to bed’

‘wOoYOUnG?! WHERE?!’

atiny loves it during fanmeets that tae and woo sing together since tae trained to be a vocal and woo loves his voice

tae does whatever he can to make woo laugh

addicted to his laugh

tae actually met woo’s parents and woo’s mom loves tae

whenever woo does anything sexy, tae just cringes and turns away

jung wooyoung say my name era is tae’s death

‘JUNG WOOYOUNG!!!’

tae just love wooyoung

periodt

‘even though we have a long schedule or practice, seeing tae makes everything more bearable.’

APPLE

TERRIFIED

jongho scares all of his hyungs but scares tae the most

when tae first saw him break an apple, his eyes practically bugged out of his head

refuses to go to the gym with jongho bc this boy is ripped and makes tae feel terrible

took tae a while to actually get used to him

now, tae squishes his cheeks and just hugs him very tight

‘my baby!!’

like how na jaemin is to park jisung

he stresses tae out sometimes

tae constantly buys him food the most out of the members bc jongho is a growing boy

we been knew that jongho just belts out some song and tae gets so startled all the time

it echoes throughout their dorm

can carry tae in one arm which terrifies his members more

‘is,,, is that??’

‘oh yeah, gucci released a new bag’

‘i’m the bag’

tae cried when jongho graduated and was like a mom and filmed the whole thing and took pictures

hates affection which makes tae give him more affection

tae and seonghwa are his moms

‘tae-hyung always wakes me up by hugging me but when i return the hug he leaves.’

yeosang: ‘maybe he’s scared that you will literally crush him to death?’

#ateez #ateez imagines #ateez scenarios #ateez 9th member #9th member of ateez #ateez oc #ateez au #ateez imagine #ateez scenario #ateez hongjoong #ateez seonghwa #ateez yunho #ateez yeosang #ateez san #ateez mingi #ateez wooyoung #ateez jongho

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marvinswriting · 4 years

Text

Shoulder Devils

Prompt: five times Janis tried to fake okay and the one time she just couldn't OH MY GOD I LOVE 5+1S OFC (this was supposed to be posted next week but i got it written within a few hours and just wanted to post it now bc holy shit its 5+1 and janis angst, my two favorite things.)

The knot in her stomach felt wound up too tight, like it would tear her insides at any moment.

Calm down, Janis, it's only the first day of school. The common sense part of her brain told her.

But every other part of her was screaming a different story.

It's your first day of high school after being homeschooled through the end of middle school. Nobody has seen you since you were plastic and you'll be totally alone during your tiny only classes.

She subconsciously gripped the shirt underneath her tighter.

Janis was on Damian's shoulder as they walked to their first class of the day.

She knew deep down she'd feel better if she vocalized her worries to Damian, that way an outside source could ease her stress, but Damian had his own worries. He was in charge of not only getting him but also Janis to their classes on time- spare her tiny periods.

Janis had unintentionally made him stressed more just by existing.

Now, that's a little dramatic. The common-sense voice in her head said. It eerily sounded like Damian. Quite fitting.

No, it's true. The other part of her brain said. This one sounded like herself.

Janis felt like she had her own tiny people on her shoulders. Just these were devils and angles, not best friends.

Damian stopped in front of a classroom.

"English, co-sized, room 148, period one."

Sure enough, they stood in front of room 148. Janis could see kids she recognized at their grade, no longer eight graders but now freshman.

"This won't be middle school." Janis mumbled to herself, trying to be reassuring.

"What?" Damian asked as he stepped into the room.

"Nothing," Janis said, a bit to fast. "Just talking to myself."

So much for that no worrying Damian part.

"Okay," Damian said slowly.

He doesn't believe you, you fucked up. Shoulder devil Janis taunted.

Damian sat in the front row of the class so Janis would be able to see the board.

"You're gonna do great today," Damian reassured her, like he could tell exactly what she needed to hear. "If you need me at all during the day, just text me, okay?"

Look, failure, you've got him all worried. Shoulder Janis mocked.

No, he's just looking out for you, like friends should. The reasonable Damian sounding subconscious said.

"I'm fine, really." Janis said with a soft smile.

Janis was pro at keeping her freakouts internal. As a plastic, she learned it better to just keep her problems to herself, bottle them up till she's lying in bed at night and they explode, like a mento in cola.

Damian didn't like the method of emotional management that Janis adapted, but old habits die hard.

Janis knew Damian wouldn't tell her to shut up like Regina would.

But he'll still judge you. Shoulder Janis reminder her. They all judge you.

So she kept her freakouts internal.

Until one night. She was at Damian's house for a sleepover. For the longest time, Janis would sleep on a makeshift bed next to Damian's nightstand. It was safer that way. Even though both Damian and Janis knew when Damian fell asleep he slept like a rock and didn't move, it wasn't worth the risk.

Cuz you're small and fragile and nothing but a worry. Shoulder Janis said. The reassuring mind Damian was quiet.

Nothing to say, because I'm right.

Janis looked over to Damian on his bed. He was lying on his back with his eyes closed, but Janis could tell he was still awake. She shifted slowly in the tiny bed, not wanting to worry Damian.

He deserves better than to be worried by you. The devil Janis sneered.

Janis knew logically that these were her own thoughts, but it felt like somebody else was saying them to her, confirming everything she feared. She was just a burden who got in the way. An irritant to all. A hassle to Damian, who had to take her everywhere.

Just like that, the mento fell in the coca-cola.

She quickly brought her hand up to her mouth to cover a cry. She didn't want to disrupt Damian. Not while he was still awake. She could fall apart when he was asleep.

Her shoulders shook as silent tears slipped down her face. Janis wiped them away briskly.

"Janis?"

Damian was sitting up in bed, looking at her small girl.

Even though the dark room, Janis could feel his eyes on her.

"I'm fine." She said abruptly. Her defensive tone cueing that she was in fact, not fine.

You fucked that one up.

Janis rubbed at the ghost tears on her face, pressing the heels of her palms into her eyes.

Damian reached forward and scooped her up gingerly, his fingers wrapping around her gently as he laid back down on his side. He held Janis to his chest, like a kid holds a teddy bear. He didn't say anything or question her, just held her close.

"I am fine, y' know" She said, but Janis gripped onto Damian's shirt despite herself, listening to Damian's heartbeat as they both fell asleep.

Janis? Where are you?

Janis glanced down at her phone. She was supposed to be meeting Damian at the tiny pick up zone, but instead, she was hiding in an empty classroom trying not to have a panic attack.

Nurse.

Janis typed back quickly, no point in telling the truth and getting Damian all worried.

Sorry if I made you wait too long and you're late to class.

You okay?

Yeah, im tits. dw about me

She placed her phone down, leaning against the cool concrete wall of the classroom. Damian would be heavily annoyed if she asked for help every time she felt this way.

He probably feels heavily annoyed with you no matter what. The inner Janis taunted.

"Right."

Janis knew Damian could tell she was upset. Janis also knew he wasn't gonna push her to talk about or bring it up first. And on top of all this knowledge, Janis knew she was in no way gonna vocalize her feelings.

Sucks for her.

They were sitting in class, and Janis was trying to face forward and do her work, but her mind went anywhere other than algebra.

She could feel Damian staring at her, but she refused to turn around a make eye contact. Janis did a shit job at hiding her emotions that morning, but she wasn't the type to admit when she was wrong. Especially not after saying she was fine so many times earlier.

Even though all she wanted to do was sleep in Damian's pocket until she had to go home, then sleep some more, she knew she just needs to push through the day under everyone's radar.

Because she was fine.

Yup, sure you are. Shoulder Janis was back, and as annoying as ever.

Janis was pretty sure her 'shoulder angle Damian' was just her brain spitting out anything positive Damian had ever said to her back out at her.

Because it all sounded very familiar.

But it all also got drowned out by the shoulder devil Janis, who was loud and mean and most importantly, she was right.

Anything shoulder Damian said, shoulder Janis had a counter that made more logical sense.

Does Damian actually like you?

Of course, he does, he's your friend! Why else would he carry you around all the time and care so much?

Pitty.

That one word made Janis's head spin because it made so much sense.

Poor space dyke. Outed in front of her whole class in middle school. A tiny who can't do jack shit by herself. Who wouldn't feel bad?

"Janis?" She was sitting on Damian's shoulder as they (no- Damian) walked to lunch. She hadn't noticed they'd arrive because she was so lost in thought.

"I'm fine." She said.

"I can't spend every second with you, its not my fault you're like in love with me."

They were at the Hubbard's. Cady was long gone. But her words still echoed.

Damian was holding Janis to his chest, one hand underneath her, the other gently pressing her there.

Janis wasn't crying. She told herself she wouldn't cry over something like this again.

But crying or not, she felt sick. Like Cady physically ripped out her heart and stomped on it.

"Janis?" Damian asked, his voice vibrating through her small body.

"I'm fine."

"No, you're not." Damian says. For once he doesn't ignore it or move along.

"You're allowed to be hurting, you're allowed to not be okay. I'll still be here with an okay Janis and a not okay Janis because you are my best friend and I love you. I know I can't make the hurt go away but I want to help and I can't do that if you shut me out and say you're fine"

It sounded like something shoulder Damian had said so many times, but hearing the real Damian say it, it drowned out the shoulder Janis, and suddenly, Janis wasn't fine. But that was okay.

Damian didn't move or interrupt her as she cried, blubbering about everyone thinking she's a stupid lesbian.

Damian didn't leave like Cady did, or judge her like Regina did.

Because he wasn't Cady or Regina.

He was Damian.

Janis felt bad for lying to him this whole time.

Of course, Damian wouldn't leave her, or make fun of her, or take pity on her.

Damian hung out with her because he loved her, and Janis didn't need any small shoulder people to tell her that.

Tag list: @musicallygt @realmisspolarbear @smallsoysauce @sourishlemons

#g/t mean girls #g/t writing #Giant/tiny #g/t #giant damian #giant male #tiny janis #g/t sfw #sfw writing

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sinkingwmyships · 4 years

Text

hEY BABY

im back at it again with

JJBA (VA) Purge AU (3)

yeeee this is the one abt the relationship scenarios ;)))

part 1 | part 2

i highly recommend checking out the previous parts first, if not this might be kinda hard to follow

between me and my 1.5 braincells we're trying really hard y'all so pls go easy on us show some support ;_;

OKAY

(oh yea a heads-up no ships are decided yet so treat all these relationship scenarios as hcs (yea imma make AUs inside an AU lmfao))

tw: (1 mention of) homophobia, referenced past abuse, bullying (??)

1. fugio

the first scenario that popped into my head is that Fugo and Giorno go to the same university (for some reason Gio's parents can afford to send him there, idk he probably got financial aid or sth, and then after he killed them (😳 awkwardddd) he's probably using their life insurance in fear of it running out). and Fugo doesn't really care for Gio bc he's a rich boye and he has his quality™️ elite friend circle so why bother himself w a nobody. but in reality all of Fugo's friends are either only on a social level (u know those ppl who you're friends w but u won't necessarily have deep convos w them or choose to hang out w them n stuff), or they're fake and only hang out w him bc of his wealth & status, or bc their rich parents are friends. plus (im referring to the anime backstory here), after the scandal w that professor who sexually harassed him, many ppl secretly hate him and talk shit abt him behind his back due to homophobia.

but anyway, Fugo's plotting against all those biches :) so where does Giorno come in? Gio, being this innocent poor boy who doesn't have a home to go back to, lives on dorm. and let's just say Fugo does too bc he doesn't have the best relationship w his demanding parents, so he was overjoyed when he finally talked them into letting him move from home into the dorms instead. (side note he prolly doesn't Purge his parents bc he needs their money.) so Gio and Fugo know of each other, but not acquaintances or anything.

and then

one day when Fugo's either

running into trouble with some authority figure at school again

just minding his own business and planning his Purge targets

Gio walks in on him, and he's either like

"omg Fugo r u ok do u need help what happened"

"omg Fugo idk what happened between u and ur targets but Purging ain't good, pls reconsider"

and Fugo, having the short-ass fuse that he does (plus probably having his pride wounded and just general mistrust of the ppl around him spurring him on):

"stfu u know nothing about me, but now you've seen this i guess it wouldn't hurt to kill you too"

"stfu u know nothing about me, ur probably one of those happy asshats that have no need for Purges, reconsider?? haha the only thing i'll reconsider is if i'll add u to my kill list" (bc if Gio reports him or sth, Fugo & his fam can get into trouble, since his targets are probably rich and/or influential ppl, but it isn't Purge time yet, so it can be considered malicious intent and/or attempted murder i guess, and so anyone who has any beef w the Fugo fam can bring them down) (i know nothing abt law don't come for me)

and then Gio is like "fuck dis shit im out" and he skrts tf out of there, but sadly Fugo ain't lying 😔 the day of the Purge comes, and Giorno was just trying to barricade himself inside his dorm room when suddenly, Fugo pulls an FBI OPEN UP and breaks inside using all his high-tech weaponry n stuff (i'll share my hcs for chara design later!!). Gio is freaking out so he jumps out the window into the streets, even risking going outside during Purge just so he can get away, but oh 🅱️oy is Fugo stressed tonight. and he literally hunts Gio down and almost kills him

uNTIL!!!¡!

2. abbacchio & giorno:

(SORRY I JUST LOVE DADBACCHIO & GIORSON SO MUCH)

Abbacchio is tasked w hunting down a certain rogue criminal, so he's la-di-da cruising thru Naples to get to Bucci's house, when suddenly this fucking kid comes running up to him with his hair and clothes all messed up and tears running down his face, and is like "pls help me sir i beg u i just need somewhere to hide pls i don't want to do this i don't want to die" and Abba's like "fuq??" but then he hears manic laughter and chainsaws revving and shit, and the kid sniveling all over his crisp™️ Purge suit looks like he can explode with fear at any moment (and plus Abba understands that nobody would ever run up to another person for help during Purge like this, unless it's really their last option), so he sighs, "fine. get behind me."

the kid drops to his knees and Abba can't help but think "aaahhhh fucking dead weight", but he said he'd help, so that's what he's gonna do. now ANOTHER kid rounds the corner but he barely looks sane, he seems almost possessed by something. *fighting ensues* but being a professional cop Abba knocks the kid out cold w a few swift moves, and when he drops to the ground that crazy expression finally leaves his face. he's already wasted too much time, so Abba turns to Kid 1 and is like "go back home brat and dont get into trouble again", but Kid 1 is still a trembling mess on the ground, and he says "i don't have any home to go back to."

subconscious Abba's like "well that's between you and god" but he knows he's basically this kid's god now (besides, there can't possibly be a god that would let things like Purges happen), so he's like, "fine. get in the car and DON'T get in my way" but THEN Kid 1 points to the passed-out demon child, "but we can't leave him here"

A: "he was gonna KILL you!!"

K1: "i know but he didn't mean it, he was just not thinking straight"

A: "Purges ain't where ppl think str8 kid, besides if he didn't really wanna Purge he wouldn't have geared himself up that well"

K1: “but he’s not a bad person. please, if we leave him out here in this state he’ll be killed for sure.”

at this point Abbacchio can't understand wtf Kid 1 is thinking, but for the first time in years he finds some of the humanity he was hoping to regain in Purge, so he's like "fine. haul him into the backseat. but you're sitting with him bc i got my shit in the front. and if he wakes up you're dealing w it this time. cool?"

Kid 1 nods, and surprisingly he has enough strength to shove Kid 2 into the backseat & get in after him. Abba is trying to decide what he wanna do w these kids, when his phone suddenly beeps, and in comes a new message from his superiors, "yo dawg u gotta hurry up and kill that Bucciarati guy, we'd better not catch u slacking" and he's like "yo Kid 1, can u fight?"

"uh, a bit. why?"

"well, that's what you're gonna do for me in return for my protection."

anywhooooo i imagine that later on, Fugo wakes up like "ugh wtf hello concussions????" and he sees Gio standing over him, and he snaps into defensive mode, sitting up and shoving Gio away and everything. but then he sees that Gio's hands are empty, save for maybe a bottle of water and a towel, and somehow Fugo's own wounds are all cleaned and bandaged, and he groans:

"dude, what the fuck are you doing? did i pass out? did you find help?"

G: "you got hit over the head pretty hard, don't move so suddenly."

F: "haha yea thanks i can feel that myself, anyway wtf were you doing?"

G: "uhhhhh... abbacchio patched you up but your face was really grimy so he told me to clean you up, and maybe give you some water?"

F: "no. i mean like what the fuck were you doing????? braincells hello?? kill me! i should be dead!!! is Purge over?? did the sirens go off before you can finish me?"

he suddenly notices how Gio just recoils and sits there with his eyes squeezed shut as Fugo shouts at him and flings his arms around. but he's seen how Gio defended himself against him, so he knows this guy can fight and is no stranger to Purges. this is the first mystery his 152 IQ has encountered in a long time, so Fugo reaches out to get Gio's attention, but then Gio jumps and slaps his hand away so hard Fugo feels his bruised brain jar. he pulls back immediately, holding his hands up, palms forward, finally kind of able to pierce together what's going on inside the blond's mind:

"sorry. wasn't gonna attack you. just... wasn't sure if you were listening to me, so i tried to get your attention."

"i was."

"okay. sorry." Fugo tries, but Gio is already standing up and leaving, glassy green eyes looking anywhere but at him. "wait! Gior— ugh??"

he almost faceplants the ground again. where's my stupid-ass helmet???? i need to be on balance mode stat. but then Fugo feels two arms helping him up, and he looks up to see Gio, frowning in distaste but still supporting him all the same. he feels bad for asking (as if he hasn't bothered this poor guy enough): "uh, so, what exactly happened while i was passed out?"

oh, honey...

a lot :)

BUT PLOT SPOILERS SO THIS ENDS HERE!!!!!! xD

ya know i might actually go w fugio after all :00 but if i do end up writing this, it will span over 12 hours / 1 Purge only, so even if there are ships they'll probably only be implied, instead of madly into each other by the end of everything :P

to be cont’d… 👀🔪 perhaps with other relationship hcs :0 or chara design?? who knows. suggestions?

feel free to drop any questions you have, or just scream to me in the cmts in general!! i’m happy to answer anything, from chara motives to backstory clarification, or anything else!! ik up to now these posts have just been walls of texts, so :’D thanks for reading thooooo 💖

part 4 | part 5

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hey-hamlet · 5 years

Text

BNHA AU Ideas: A Poor Bird

Also on AO3! (if you recognise the au it might be because I started a full fic which i abandoned because i realised a full canon retelling is l o n g. i’ll still probably write bits and pieces like the other AUs)

TL;DR: Izuku isn't quirkless. Not that Inko would ever let you know that.

AKA: Good dad Enji, bad mum Inko

TW: Child Abuse

Inko Quirk: Attraction of small objects Issues:

Many

Soooooooo many

Hisashi Quirk: All for one

Izuku Quirk: Push and Pull

Allows him to push objects away from him, or pull objects towards him.

If the object is heavier than him, the force acts on him instead

Injuries

Crush injures on the hand, never healed correctly

Limited range of movement + tremors

Issues

Feels horrifically ill if he uses his quirk, has flashbacks. Cant use it at all until he is trained by allmight

Can't remember his mother hurting him outside of flashbacks and nightmares. Only knows it happened bc katsuki can remind him

PTSD

Dislikes: Being called "cute" or being implied to be helpless but he can suck it up if hes not feeling too shitty.

Enji 47

First-year in All Might's final year.

Met Rei when he first reached the top ten, aged 22 and married her a year later, with fuyumi on the way just a quickly

Knows ab. All Mights other form

Rei 48

Does ballet!

Shouto 15

No scar

Yet, anyway. We can fix that.

Touya 19 Changes

A little less crispy fried, still scarred by his own quirk. Wears gold contacts undercover as Dabi

Natsuo

Studying Medicine

Fuyumi

She's a teacher!

Mushy Stuff feat. The Todoroki’s

enji is still number 2 hero. hes actually really nice? he just has a major case of resting bitch face. hes from a rich family, he got dragged out to a ballet to celebrate his becoming number 2 and he was whining we hes like, 21 and doesnt wanna see a ballet he just wants to go to work, or get drinks with his sidekicks. hes being a bit of a grump and his parents are living for their grumpy son bc he still has Round cheeks and hes adorable

anyway its been like, 20 minutes and the show finally starts and enji is like "god i can go home after this and s l e e p" but like, the lady comes out on stage and hes in love. tall, white hair and incredibly graceful. his mum has to hit him bc hes blushing so hard hes getting uncomfortably warm

after the show he like, breaks into her dressing room. hes got his hands clamped over his eye and he like "oh my god im so sorry if you are changing i promise im not looking i just have somewhere to be after this but please what do i have to do to get you to agree to go to dinner with me"

and rei is r e d bc the grouchy number 2 hero has burst into her dressing room and hes bright red and his hair is smouldering slightly and she just laughs and pulls his hands away from his eyes and tells him she'd love to. enji just walks out, faintly dazed with rei's number on his phone and hes so ridiculously happy he cant stop his hair from smoking

anyway, they date, they get married etc

but rei's ballet company is threatening to drop her if she has kids bc she wont be "perfect" anymore and she's torn up about it bc enji started dating her because of ballet and what if he hates her? but enji is like ",,, i kinda,,, love you? plus you and our hypothetical kids with be gods gift to this earth. i will buy you a whole ballet company if i have to"and shes crying and everything is soft

she has fuyumi and she is the worlds most perfect baby and enji is the most protective dad on this planet

then she has dabi bc she wanted fuyumi to have a sibling and dabi is born w his quirk and sneezes embers and enji is crying because his son is perfect

and then they have another kid bc they are sickeningly in love and their children are all wonderful and they have natsuo who likes to eat not food things and rei loves her chunky toddler. enji is crying because "hes gonna be such a big strong man" and also because natsuo keeps trying to eat his flaming beard

and then they have shouto bc "fuck it more children” hes born and rei is crying bc "look he looks just like you enji!" and enji is crying because "rei he looks just like you,,," and fuyumi is crying bc she has another little brother, dabi is trying not to cry bc hes a big strong 5 yearold and natsuo is like,,, 3 and hes trying to est his baby brothers hair and hes perfect

also!!! dabi is a double agent. he loves his dad v much and is pretending to be a villain to keep him and the rest of his family safe

enjis that dad that’s so fucking embarrassing and he does it on purpose?? during the sports festival he’s in his seat and he’s just “sHOUTOOOO” everyone turns and they’re just ???? todoroki s bright red but he’s yelling back

“wHAT”

endeavour, making a lil heart with his hands: “i love you and i’m very proud of you ♥️”

hi please enji sending photos of his kids to allmight all the time. all might fucking adores these little children and sends them so much random merch bc they are so fucking cute. he holds natsuo who’s trying to eat his weird bunny ear hair and he’s just

i love,,,these kids,,,

natsuo is a Chunky Boy. hes a toddler with the density of lead, hes so fucking heavy and round and allmight adores him. shouto looks at you judgingly even as a baby and allmight feels personally attacked

Pre canon + Training arc

in this au, izuku has a stronger version of his mothers quirk. like, really good telekinesis and he wants to be a hero! she hits him if he uses his quirk, makes him say hes quirkless and weak, says she just wants to protect him. she withholds food to keep him "perfect" because

"your father ruined me, now im all covered in ugly stretch marks and im disgusting, but ill make you perfect"

inko makes izuku wear feminine clothes and keep his hair long bc shes kinda trying to make him into like, the perfect version of her? and she always threatens to scrub izukus "fathers" freckles off his face with steel wool

shes ,,, conflicted about Katsuki

(katsuki knows something is up w inko and izuku so hes not terrible)

because she doesnt want her "perfect" sweet son to become brash like Katsuki but she kinda,,, likes her son being the damsel in distress that has to be saved by his stronger friend? and thinks that if izuku has a guard he won't need to be strong himself if they play in her house, inko is the villain, katsuki is the hero and izuku has to be the hostage that needs to be saved.

izuku tells katsuki about his quirk one day and he mentions it in front of inko. katsuki is almost thrown out of the house and he can hear izuku screaming from inside, and hes trying to get through the door bc his friend his crying and its not his fault. he stays there with this ear pressed against the door for hours. izuku stops crying after 45 minutes, inko starts saying shes sorry after 3 hours

inko crushed her son's hands

inko needs her hands for her quirk to work and assumes izuku does too? So she methodically crushes every finger and his wrists to try to ruin his ability to use his quirk. izukus hands heal but he cant write without it hurting and that makes him really upset bc he loves to draw. its the only thing that his mum lets him do that he enjoys. inko says sorry but she still blames him

"im sorry it hurt honey but mummy had to do it, you understand right?"

from that day forward katsuki starts training to be a hero bc he doesnt want anyone getting hurt like izuku ever again. he helps izuku train too in secret, they work together to lie because izuku wants to he a hero, and if he can survive his mother? he can do anything.

after that time w inko he cant use his quirk. like, physically? he can, but he has panic attacks and freezes up if he tries. basically izuku gets bullied for being quirkless, but not by Katsuki

ep 1 happen kind like normal. izuku asks "can i be a hero without a quirk?" allmight says no but he manages to use his quirk to save katsuki and katsuki hugs him as he cries, izuku pulls katsuki from the sludge villain w his quirk, allmight saves the day

the heroes are like, 2 secs from scolding izuku for using his quirk but the boy is having a horrific panic attack and they would feel bad ab it. also katsuki looks like hes gonna commit real actual murder if someone so much as touches izuku so they awkwardly walk away

allmight confronts izuku ab. the whole "i though you were quirkless" thing and izuku has another panic attack and all might feels terrible izuku is basically apologising for having a quirk??? that that sits really badly w toshi so he asks izuku if he can help him and katsuki train to be heroes and izuku cries and says yes

izuku looks at the time and starts crying again and allmight is like??? did i do something wrong???

izuku is sobbing that he doesnt wanna go home because "she'll be so angry" and toshi is like,,, holy shit im just gonna steal this child i guess but izuku convinces him hes overacting and izuku runs home, after toshi gives him his phone number and stresses that izuku is allowed to call even for "stupid" reasons

mitsuki is confused that katsuki looks so worried hes like,, pacing and he keeps sticking his head outside to look over the balcony to the street and checking his phone bc izuku hasnt told him what happened yet and hes scared that inko finally snapped and hurt him too badly to recover from

inko??? wasnt happy

shes beating izuku with heavy stuff and asking him if he thinks shes a terrible mother or something. izuku is crying because hes sorry and he didnt mean to use his quirk he was just scared. inko starts crying and is patching him up and says that she only hurts him because she loves him and wants him to be happy and perfect . izuku doesnt get food for 2 days after that, he has to sneak out to train w katsuki and all might. all might actually asks katsuki ab. it

"his mother is fucking crazy. my mum doesnt believe me but shes batty. lost it when her husband left and is trying to keep izuku like a fucking doll, its creepy"

izuku tends to wear gloves of long sleeves, or draws over his hands bc they are c o v e r e d in scares. on a particularly bad training day izuku cant hold his water bottle and he cant stop himself tearing up so katsuki holds the bottom for it and izuku is so embarrased and gratful and all might wants to cry because who hurt this kid???

like,, three? months into the training izuku comes up to all might and the kid is shaking and pale but he looks so determined and he says in the softest voice "i want to start training my quirk" and all might smiles like the sun

Entrance Exam

So allmight has already given his quirk to Mirio, he and nighteye made up. Hes out heroing, saves izuku from the sludge villain, Izuku doesn’t cling on but there is something ab the way Izuku looks at him that worries allmight so he stays to answer his question and runs out of time. Izuku asks if he can be a hero w/o a quirk, allmight hesitates. Izuku just quietly says "its ok, thank you for your time" and leaves. All might feels terrible.

He realises the sludge villain is gone, curses and runs towards the explosions. Izuku is wandering around trying to find Katsuki and sees the sludge villain has him. W/o wasting a moment he runs towards him, trying to pull him free. He uses his quirk to pull him out by the shirt and stands infront of katsuki to try to keep him safe. Allmgiht rushes in to help.

The heroes try to tell Izuku off but katsuki just yells at them and they hurry away. They run into Yagi and he tries to talk to Izuku but katsuki just yells at him. Allmight explains his form thing and tells izuku he can totally be a hero but oh hey werent you quirkless?

Katsuki is ab. To rip Allmights head off, izuku just explains he doesn’t much like his quirk. All might asks if he can help train the two of them to be heroes and they agree 100%. Izuku has to run home and leaves Katsuki w allmight. Katsuki tells him he'll need to look after Izuku and walks off in the same direction. Allmight is l o s t

Izuku gets beaten byhis mother for using his quirk, sneaks out to train with yagi and katsuki. Yagi is worried but there isnt much he can do. Mirio and Sir show up sometimes to chat w allmight and help training, All might admits hes going into teaching bc hes going to have to retire soon and Izuku tells him he'll be amazing at it, katsuki just roasts allmight

Day of the entrance exam mirio wishes them both good luck .

Izuku has told his mother hes taking the gen-ed written exam and has permission to go get food with katsuki afterwards. He has applied for gen-ed and the hero course and honestly doesn’t believe he'll get into heroics but he has to try.

Someone pushes him, Occhako catches him, they all say hello and enter the written exam hall. Izuku finds it easy as pie so hes honestly kinda worried that hes missing something (hes not, hes just smart). There is a moral dilema at the end of the test and he answers it in a way that concerns the markers (in a self esteem kinda way)

So they enter the auditorium and and izuku finds out he isnt in katsukis arena which makes im panic, but he tells him to suck it up because hes a grown as teenager and can handle himself which cheers izuku up. Iida calls them out for talking.

At the arena hes having a quiet breakdown, sees ochako and lights up, goes to talk to her but Iida tells him off for being a trouble maker. Someone in the crowd snidly asks "when did they start letting 12-year-old girls take the exam" and izuku feels like dirt. Mic calls start and his fight/flight is so overreactive he throws himself straight into the exam

Pulling rubble and crap w great force through the robots, he gets around 20 points? But after a while he just shuts down. He feels sick and he hates his quirk and his mother and his hnds ache and he just c a n t do it anymore.

Aizawa watches this kid in arena 4 crumple to the ground and he spares a moment to be sad for the kid. He looked promising, but its not the first time someone has cracked under the pressure durring the entrance exam. He sees allmgiht looking saddened out of the corner of his eye, locked on the screen, and thinks maybe this kid is why he asked to be excluded from the judging team.

Izuku sees the zero pointer and cant even bring himself to run away. But then he hears ochako cry out and instantly sprints towards her.

He pulls himself into the air and pulls as many shards of scrap metal and rebar as he can, and pulls them with all his might through the 0 pointer, turning into a giant pincusion. He runs out of energy, and just lets himself fall.

Aizawa feels his heart sink bc the kid is smiling.

Ochako saves him at the last moment, and hes miraculously uninjured but so out of energy he can barely stand. Recovery girl hands him gummies which he gratefully accepts and drags himself out of the exam. He meets katsuki by the entrance. He sees his tiny mess of a friend, pale and shakey but smiles and he picks him up and hugs him even though he will deny it till the day he dies. izuku is sure he failed but for one moment, using his quirk? he just felt so complete and free that he doesnt mind if he fails, just because he got to enjoy that one moment. bakugo tells izuku that hes gonna drag him into the hero course by his hair and izuku giggles

They go get food bc they need some relief.

Izuku doesn’t think he's in the heroics department but is hopeful anyway.

he and bakugo spend the week waiting for their letters "studying" for ua (aka, designing hero costumes, coming up with names, planning the fuck out of everything bc they are both crazy nervous and will never admit it)

inko hands izuku his mail and izuku is so nervous because if she looked? its game over but she just smiles happily and tells him to tell her if he got into gen ed. or not so they can invite the bakugo's over to celebrate

izuku walks calmly until his mum is out of sight, then he tears down the hall, stuffs a towel under the door and opens his letter under his blankets so she cant hear it. its allmgiht on the screen and he cries.

and he got in and he cries some more

and then he has a quick panic attack becuase holy shit this is a lot of lies hes going to have to spin because he came first in the entrance exam. his mum asks him if he got in and hes so grateful that his voice doesnt shake when he cries, as he says back "i got into gen. ed mum!!"

He finds out he got in and he starts to panic bc what is he going to tell his mum? Some point later Inko yells at him for just sitting around so he runs out of the house and to a cat café, and hes just sobbing because his face hurts from where she slapped him and he just wants to get out of the rain.

Shinso sees this kid, curses his heroic instincts and pays for 2 hours for him and the mystery kid. He just wanted to wallow in self pity for failing the exam he knew he was going to fail, but now hes got a crying kid to deal with

So turns out the kid is his age and is called Midoriya. As only izuku can do, hes shinso spilling his guts ab the hero course and his quirk in around 20 minutes. Izuku explains a bit about what his mother did to him, and that he got into the hero course but if his mother finds out hes scared shitless of what she'll do.

Shinsou’s family before Aizawa was shit, he gets it. And he sees this cute green-haired sobbing kid gently kiss a fat tabby on the top of its little head and decides he'd die for him.

They plot that they'll change shirts at the start of the day so inko doesn’t see the hero course shirt, and shinso will quickly tell him what they were doing in gen ed on the train home. Shinso does urge izuku to get help but izuku declines. His mother is sick and she's trying her best. She still loves him. Izuku is scared of who his dad is.

And it's not like anyone ever believed his soft, kind-looking mother could hurt her own son.

First day + Quirk Apprehension Test

Inasa is a recommendation student, along with Momo and Todoroki, was placed in Aizawa class bc his quirk is kinda wack.

Class does not contain Hagekure, Mineta is expelled

like, first day of school shinso is waiting down the road for izuku and bakugo is like,,, ha????? and shinso is like "oK So i have the hero course shirt, change behind a tree like a bunch of weirdos or wait for school" and izuku is like,,, “as much as my anxiety wants to change now so we wont be late i think kacchan might murder us if we change behind a tree" and bakugo is like??? "YeaH and WHO ARE YOU EXACTLY"

anyway! they take the bus and shinso explains that the bonded over a chubby tabby and that hes agreed to be izuku alibi and katsuki looks him up and down like ",,, you pass" and izuku giggles and shinso feels happy bc he didnt know the boy could giggle and its such a soft noise

anyway, izuku and shinso sprint into school to find a bathroom to change in, izuku tries not to cry on his hero shirt. they then proceed to speed walk to the correct class bc the other students have shown up and they dont wanna get yelled at. katsuki told izuku he could walk himself to class because "youre a big boy now" and izuku laughs again

izukus anxiety vs trauma is a continuous war bc anxiety says "hide behind friends" but trauma says "dont be weak and pathetic like inko says you are or shes been right the whole time"

izuku gets into class, bakugo is busy trying to scare iida bc iida is Really Getting On His Nerves. iida says hi to izuku and izuku almost cries before iida says that he was sorry for being a dick and then izuku almost cries again but bc hes happy

ochako bursts in like "OH MY GOD THE CUTE ONE GOT IN" and izuku is Red and like (a lil trauma but he shoves that way deep down) and says hi. aizawa crawls in and scares the actual shit out of everyone but izuku finds him super calming? bc hes just so fucking blunt and he doesnt have to look for double meanings

anyway, izuku gets called up to do the throw bc he came first and hearing aizawa say "use your quirk" made a cold sweat run through him but bakugo gave him a thumbs up so he felt a little better. The boy gets a crazy score. izuku gets a great score on all the stuff he can use his quirk for, but hes got terrible stamina/strength bc hes just so thin. hes placing like, first quarter of the class

so they finish, mineta gets kicked out

allmight is watching from behind a bush bc look at his boys go!!! his yelly boy and his crying boy!!. aizawa holds izuku back at the end of class, bakugo doesnt wanna leave him but tenya pushes him to the locker room

"so kid. thats a great quirk youve got there"

and izuku,,, really doesnt like talking about his quirk. he doesn't like using it. he and bakugo drew vines on his hands this morning to cover up the scars and hes tracing his fingers along them to keep himself from shaking.

aizawa looks him dead in the eye

"mind telling me why you are registered as quirkless?"

and izuku freezes. he cant breathe.

aizawa is waiting and his irritation turns to alarm when he realizes the kid i s n t m o v i n g. all might has seen izuku freak out before so he swoops in and sits izuku down on the ground and tries to get the kid to breath. he does but hes still shaking and all he'll stay is "im sorry" and "not again"

aizawa is very much shaken because izuku seemed pretty normal? then he remembered the kid shinso was talking about. allmight calls bakugo who runs back out onto the field, half in uniform and half in costume and hes trying to calm izuku down and he looks like,,, 2 seconds away from ripping aizawa head off and aizawa honestly thinks hes kinda deserves it lmao

its nearing the end of school and izuku isnt even down from his panic attack yet but bakugo n e e d s shinso to get over here so they can swap shirts or izuku is going to be in even more trouble than he already is. so bakugo is trying to get izuku to respond to anything, allmight has his hand on his not sons shoulder, aizawa feels like a piece of shit, and bakugo is trying to find shinso's contact number in izuku's phone

some of class a goes to look outside and aizawa lays into the and tells them to hurry up to class or he'll expell them all with mineta

anyway shinso comes running out bc his teacher is mic and is willing to let him do dumb stuff and shinso is like??? dad its been 1 day what did you do to the cat kiss boy?? shinso allmight and bakugo get izuku responsive enough that bakugo takes him to swap his shirts in the changing rooms and helps izuku clean up so its not obvious he was crying. shinso gets izukus stuff from his classroom. aizawa just turns to all might

“ok so what the fuck was that"

all might honestly shrugs "i barely know myself. kid has serious quirk trauma and is scared of his mother, thats all i can tell you" and aizawa is both concerned and annoyed bc ofcourse thsi si in his class

izuku and bakugo get home, alls good

Battle Trial

battle trial! its,,a ride

basically! izuku has his lil costume and ochako tells him he looks really cute and hes grateful + trauma. bakugo tells him he looks like hes ready to bust some heads which makes him feel better. todoroki is with iida on the villain team

they are chatting happily about have hero families and being melodramatic about being evil

Izuku is paired with inasa!

so izuku cant directly use his quirk on himself, but he can "push" against the ground, which sends him up. its useful for dodging but not sustainable

anyway, they work out that inasa's wind doesnt effect izukus telekinesis

basically:

izuku makes some dust, they roll in, todoroki is out and looking for them. he torches the dust but gets hit by a pebble to the temple. inasa is like, 100% impressed. they wrap todoroki up and inasa says sorry to his half/half bro. todoroki shrugs. bakugo is like, internally cheering and he has the most murderous smile

anyway, iida is melodramatic, inasa looses it laughing bc hes so funny and takes a big ol kick to the face. hes down, probs concussed but iida cant get in to tie him up because he almost gets squished by the currently moving bomb bc its paper mache its light and easy for izuku to pull on

iida decides he should probably take down izuku before anything happens, but at the last moment izuku pushes off the ground, dodging over iida and lightly tapping the bomb

hero team wins!!!

inasa and todoroki are both concussed which is awkward but its all g. izuku gets MVP but iida was a close second. bakugo like, friendly punches izuku in the arm and hes hiding behind bakugo bc people are looking at him but hes very happy

someone says "wow, your quirk is amazing" and hes like,,, "oh there goes my good mood." allmight and bakugo are about to tell this kid to shut the fuck up but get beaten to it by a concussed todoroki of all people

"its not the quirk its how he uses it you overipe melon"

izuku giggles until he cant breathe and bakugo is cackling. concussed todoroki looks so pleased with himsel

bakugo and kiri are teams up and they kick actual ass as the villains. like, crazy good, they take out the heroes and dont even have to let it run over time

because "if we win? we do it right."

izuku is like doing these little happy bounces and inasa is crying bc his partner is so pure

izuku and shinso meet up, change, go home

U.S.J.

Happens like 3 weeks in, not 3 days in. They need time to bond ok. Before the trip we get some general hyjinks.

the next day, its field trip time baby!!!

inasa makes izuku sit with him and todoroki and its a tight fucking fit bc they are sharing 2 seats. inasa has like,,, claimed this boy because he was so soft and izuku has a friend!! and hes very happy. hes like,, a little scared of todoroki but also kinda loves him for the overripe melon comment so

Kurogiri yeets the villains into the usj. allmight is out of time, aizawa runs in like normal. inasa, izuku and tsuyu get sent to the shipwreck zone. they do some cool shit honestly. inasa holds the 3 of them in the air, tsuyu hold the villains together as izuku yeets them into the hull of the ship and seals the hold and hopes the villains dont really care enough to break a hole in the ship. Inasa gets them all to shore

then they get to witness the nomu and izuku sees the punch thrown? and he moves without thinking, using all of his quirk he can to hold to nomus fist back. after he moves, inasa joins in, pushing the nomu back as much as the can. aizawa punches shigiraki and he gets m a d. shigiraki breaks the capture weapon and sends the nomu after tsuyu. inasa, who was closer, pushes her out of the way and takes the hit. its just like, 1 blow? but hes down to the count. aizawa tells tsuyu to take him and run

izuku wants to throw up

aizawa tries to get him to run but the nomu charges again and izuku has to pull aizawa out of the way. all they can do is play keep-away and aizawa is frustrated because no matter the training he has, he can't stand up to this thing. all he can do is rely on izuku's quirk, because the quirk can move faster than a human can. shigiraki gets sick of this, kurogiri uses momentum to send aizawa to the other side of the usj with kiri and Bakugo. they begin to run back to the plaza. izuku is scared, slips up, takes a hit. hes down, with broken ribs and his quirk is nearing overuse

shigiraki sees this kid's broken hands, laughs and makes the nomu crush them again

bakugo blasts in, grabs izuku. todoroki has the nomu trapped in ice, aizawa wraps izukus hands with what he was left of his capture weapon

all might bursts in. he has more of his quirk left bc he hasnt passed it on yet, takes out the nomu and has enough strength to still be standing. shigiraki goes to attack, and izuku basically uses the last of his strength to pull allmight towards him, then he collapses

the other heroes arrive with endeavour! because he was patrolling nearby and got the alert. is his agency in hosu? Yep! do i care? nope hes here to see his son!

aizawa is like, moossttlylyy ok? shigiraki got to his arm and he's got scrapes and sprains from being yeeted around by izuku's quirk but he's pretty ok. inasa has a punctured lung but is stabilized quickly. izukus bones arent fractured? but hes got a pretty bad crush injury to both hands + cracked ribs and low blood sugar. bakugo rides w him back to ua

shinso is there and hes a little panicky bc his dad and bro were in a villain attack. nezu comes into recovery girls office and is like "oh its ok! ive contacted everyone’s parents and they should be here soon" and bakugo is like "YOU DID WHAT"

nezu sweating ",,, what do you mean this is what im ment to do"

and allmight cringes; aizawa, on painkillers, is like, pretty concerned; bakugo is enraged. izuku isnt breathing. hes frozen, crying silently and hes perfectly still and it breaks recovery girls heart

hes got a big bruise of the side of his face, fyi

bakugo doesnt want to leave but recovery girl orders him out, all might gets made to leave as well. soon the only people left are inasa (unconscious) izuku (catatonic) and aizawa (guilty)

inko walks in. shes smiling. she grabs izuku by the hand, "its ok honey, mummy's here now!"and aizawa?? hes trying not to judge but he gets a terrible feeling in the pit of his stomach. inko pulls izuku from the bed by his crushed hand and izuku is silent. she has a hand wrapped around the back of his neck as she leads him out of the school

bakugo is at home and hes begging his mother to let him see izuku bur his mother wont let him because inko has been through something stressful and doesnt need you yelling! and bakugo is angry because shes never believed him about inko. he throws his plate against the wall and looks mitsuki dead in the eyes

"you'll regret that tomorrow. you'll regret that when you see what shes done to him"

his door slams

the day after the usj zuku isnt in school. shinso is waiting at the end of his street but only bakugo shows up. he looks defeated

"lets just go"

shinso spends the whole day in the hero course shirt

aizawa isnt surprized, loads of kids didnt show up to school the day after the usj, even non-hero kids, but then izuku isnt there the next day. bakugo is pacing, tugging at his hair as he waits for aizawa to show up. inasa looks lost, todoroki looks faintly confused, shinso is in the classroom, didnt leave to go to his own because bakugo doesnt know where midoriya is and hes waiting for aizawa

aizawa walks in with the bell. no izuku. his heart sinks. He looks around, and walks straight back out of class, sends mic to cover for him. he tells nezu. nezu has a terrible feeling and asks him and allmight to perform a wellness check. allmight uses his hero form, even though he doesnt have much time to waste, because this isnt a waste

they arrive at inkos house, they knock and she opens the door. shes smiling and asks if they would like to sit down, if they want some tea. there is blood under her fingernails

aizawa aks to use the bathroom, sneaks into midoriyas room. the kid is locked to the bed in the dark and aizawa wants to throw up bc he can smell blood and infection

inko took steel wool and scrubbed "off" every bruise on midoriya's skin to make him "clean" again

every mark

every cut

his hands are, oddly, untouched with their horrible crush marks healed by recovery girl as priority, but the side of his face, his ribs cage, the cuts on his arms and legs and back are raw. no skin, sticky blood dripping onto the sheets. aizawa goes over to izuku and he honestly smells like rotting meat because his room is hot and he has massive open injuries that are super infected. he tries to shake izuku awake and realizes the kid is burning. izuku fliches and is trying to pull away from aizawa, opening cuts and pulling at his wounds. hes so quiet aizawa wants to cry. he gently pats izukus hair and tells him he'll be safe now

hes walks out of the room and throws inko from the couch onto the floor, cuffing her. allmight is shocked, inko is screaming. aizawa cuffs inko to a couch and drags all might into izukus room and all might wants to cry

because, something aizawa hadn't noticed, every single piece of hero merch izuku owned has been ripped from its hiding place and crushed and torn on the floor. all might oh so gently breaks the cuffs holding into down and gently, gently picks him up. he cant stop the tears

izuku lets out the softest "im so sorry sensei" and aizawa has to leave the room. he sucker punches inko, calls nezu and an ambulance. inko is, thank god, unconscious now and the house is so quiet

so quiet aizawa can hear all might crying

mitsuki runs in bc she thinks her tiny friend is getting hurt and she sees her sons teacher sitting with his head between his legs on the floor like hes trying not to cry. he just points and she sees the number 1 hero holding this red and broken boy and she screams. she has to run back out to throw up into the kitchen sink

she calls Katsuki. hes sitting in class, most of the class is pacing or doodling, or chatting. mic doesn't have the heart to try and teach them but he also isn't cleared to tell them whats going on because he doesnt know

bakugos phone rings and the kid tears open his bag. all mistuki says it "im so sorry" and bakugo throws his phone into the wall so hard it shatters

mic like, yells bc a kid just shattered his phone and bakugo leaps over his desk to get to the door. mic grabs him by the collar

"hey listener? what do you think you're doing?"

bakugo is white and clammy

"let go." "listener?" "let. go."

mic drops him and bakugo tears down the hall, he kicks open shinsou's door and hauls him out of the room. midnight tries to stop him but bakugo is basically already off school grounds. shinso doesn't even need to ask, he can guess

they are running as fast as the can, faster than either of them have ever run. they don't even bother with the stairs, bakugo uses his quirk to haul them both up the side. bakugo and shinsou try to run in but aizawa just grabs them and pulls them close, he won't let them pass. aizawa isn't even angry but he won't let go of them, like hes scared someone will hurt another of his students, mitsuki drags Bakugo to her side and just holds him like she used to when he got hurt them he was little. the house is silent other than random crying, sirens in the distance

the ambulance comes and they come to take izuku but all might doesn't want to let go of this kid he's failed so badly, so he gently carries him all the way down and lays him on the stretcher. there is blood caked on his suit jacket

ok so as an fyi? izukus injuries arent terrible but hes missing a lot of skin. still has cracked ribs, has a serious infection and is critically dehydrated from fluid loss due to lost skin, plus the fact he hasn't been given food or water for 2 days

it's not the injuries that are the problem, its the dehydration/fever

1A is shaken. mic is shaken and 20 minutes after bakugo runs out? nezu announces that classes have been cancelled for the day and that students may remain on campus if they have no other way home and mic??? the guy is shaken. his husband is missing, all might left, nemuri says bakugo took shinso too

mic has to tell the class school is cancelled, 1 hour into the day but he can't tell them why because he doesn't know. momo, uraraka and kouda just kinda, start to cry bc they can feel something terrible has happened

todoroki invites everyone over to his house until school would have normally ended. they get over to shoutos house and hes like "so,,, you all wanna know whats happened right?" and he gets a bunch of silent nods. he just kinda, says a preemptive sorry to the pic of his dad on the wall and breaks open his hero office door. 1A is crowded around the computer as shouto, momo and tenya are scanning for anything in alerts and shouto stops and points

"minimal security transport and medical assistance to mustutafu, rapid response requested."

they click on it

Heroes Responding: Eraserhead (underground), All Might Civilian Involvement: 2 Adults (stable, no medical response) 3 Children (2 stable, 1 unknown. medical response requested) Villain: N/A Alert Type: Domestic Violence

tenya has to walk away. so does inasa and todoroki

Endeavour storms in bc "shouto, why did you break into my personal office-" and he sees these kids and they looks broken and his son just clings to him. he feels his heart drop, because he doesnt know whats happened, but its not fucking good

w recovery girl + iv fluids and antibiotics, izuku heals up pretty quick but hes got some big scars. shallow but red and angry looking

school doesnt start again until next Wednesday, 7 days after the usj and the dorms have been built

bakugo and shinso wouldn't leave izuku. like, aizawa threatened to expel Bakugo and he still wouldn't go. when izuku wakes up, his two brothers are holding his hands and he cries because hes alive and they are there

so, dorms

everyone swarms izuku bc that's the soft man who they love who saved them in the usj and also they thought he was dead for a hot minute and izuku is crying and there are hugs. aizawa is very fond of his dumb children and they train for the sports festival

U.A. Sports Festival

Events

Event 1 : Battle Royal

so like, battle royal w a shrinking perimeter. 3 hits and you’re out. A hit is contact with another person, thrown object or quirk.

they all wear like these rly uncomfortable body suits that register touches anywhere bc nezu is a nightmare. they all fucking hate these things and nezu is cackling be he had them made but no one would let him use them

during the event, bakugo yells "MAKE IT THROUGH AND SHOW THOSE CHUCKLE FUCKS WHAT 1A IS MADE OF” a resounding yell of “FUCK YEAH” echos through the examinees

no matter what nezu does, not a single member of 1A lands a hit on another. like, bakugo trips and izuku uses his quirk to get him out of the range f kirishima

all of 1A makes it through. all of them. every single one, followed by half of 1B, plus 10ish mixed gen ed and support kids

gen ed, absolutely disgusted: “it’s clear ua favours 1a”

inasa, outraged and very loud: “sAY THAT TO MY FACe”

please, during the fight izuku goes to throw a punch at the person in front of him, they turn around and all he can see its purple hair and eyes and he cant. he uses his quirk to push himself away from shinso

izuku like,,, takes out most of the people bc he yeets people at eachother. he and inasa protect everyon from 1A! todoroki and bakugou team up, double the fire power. ochako is sad bc she cant help bc she cant touch her class mates so she yeets rocks at people. sato / kiri / bakugo make a sit tone of rubble for her, inasa makes a wind vortex above 1A, then she drops it. thats how they take out almost everyone

Event 2: Blind Tag

after the event their costumes light up. half red, half white. the anouncment is just "red is it. if you are still it in 10 minutes you dont move on. good luck" the area turns pitch b l a c k. all natural light is gone so all you can see is the glowing suits (the audience can see bc they have heat cams) and cementoss adds some varying terrain.

- not gonna lie? it wasnt going to be blind tag but nezu didnt want the last fight to be just 1A

izuku is it he tags someone then avoids being tagged again

inasa is not it. he floats in a corner for like, the whole game but gets hit by ibara near the end

bakugo and todoroki are both not it and team up to make a firey circle of hell, they make it through

shinso does too and hes a really cool fight that no one but him and the audience get to see. he ends up choking this guy out, tags him and sprints away

Event 3: Tournament

momo/monoma, shinso/shoji, tsuyu/kendo, jiro/kuroiro, todoroki/hatsume, iida/awase, bakugo/kirishima, izuku/ochako

momo/iida, todoroki/shinso, izuku/tsuyu, bakugo/jiro

iida/izuku, shinso/bakugo

bakugo/izuku > Izuku wins

Vs. Hero Killer

Interns with Nighteye and Mirio as they do special training w gran. Working with Endeavours agency to find herokiller. Nomu attack, Nighteye tells Mirio to get Izuku to safety, Izuku tells Mirio ab. Iida. Another Nomu corners them, after internal deliberation Mirio tells izuku to go after Iida. Finds Iida, sends location.

Two Heroes

For one, Mirio and Nighteye are there, along with Izuku.

Forest Training Camp

They take Izuku too, because he was holding Bakugo's hand

Nighteye asks to see Allmight's future and allmight declines. Hes going to do it no matter what the future says, and he refuses to set it in stone by seeing it

Mirio is part of the rescue squad, 50% bc he's the one who will take the fall for the whole thing with his license. Besides, he knows about All for One, and it's his duty as a wielder of One for All to at least try to help his mentor.

"I mean, I could have just taken the boy's arm. But those nasty scars tell me hes very much seen the worst humanity has to offer. Perhaps he'd like to join as well."

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merrysithmas · 5 years

Note

mmmm hard and quick question who tops boris or theo

😂🤣sorry i just need to pick myself up off the floor after thinking about THEO topping anyone of his own free will. the only kind of person i can imagine Theo topping is like... Agent Q from the new Bond movies but even after that they're like, yeahhh maybe this isn't for us. Lmao. Bc Theo doesn't like... want that.

(disclaimer: as a gay, i personally don't really like analyzing this topic in fandom, there is no menu or standard to human behavior and everyone reacts to the world differently and experiences pleasure differently, esp in a queer dynamic, so im like... who cares, dynamics are fluid anyway. but for sake of analyzing text here we go)

Based off the context of their personalities and dynamic, it is obvious Theo is thrown into massive depression and self-loathing when sleeping with women (Carol, Kitsey, Julie). He describes the experiences of sleeping with women as something he is monotonously expected to do, something that makes him uncomfortable and ashamed, or something substandard, and he never colors his descriptions of his affairs with women with passion, relief, or pleasure. He is like an automaton, simply following society's rules of how he "should" act and behave (or what he believes is so), essentially a Live Action Roleplay of misery that he follows with total loathing but adament piousness to stave off the horrors of his PTSD.

Now this is a point because of the way Theo and Boris (1) feel power and (2) experience comfort. Theo feels comfort and safety and power when he is vulnerable. He spends the entire book presenting a tremelous facade of being untouchable, invulnerable, and aloof (sometimes forcibly) when all the while he is dying inside from post-traumatic stress. He is a monumentous wall that could crack if you rested a feather on it. Yet Theo desperately abandons that ruse when he runs and crushes the painting to himself, his only relief, his most vulnerable and relieving moments. Crying, curling his fingers over it, feeling safe and sound alone and soft and aching when no one is looking. His only peace. Well, until Boris. Until Boris came along and held and crushed Theo himself to his own chest (mirroring how Theo crushed the painting) as Theo would wake screaming, choked with sobs, lulled to sleep in Boris' comforting arms. Again, safe, vulnerable, at peace.

So what I am saying is, Theo feels emotional fulfillment and safety and comfort not from the expression of control or power (in fact his agency is very much deleted by those things, as he actively kills his soul little by little with his obsessive unhealthy control and perfectionism of his fake life). Theo is relieved by and emotionally fulfilled by the expression of vulnerability and reception of safety and love. His best self is brought out and his healing starts and he feels like himself - like he is whole, finally.

So while Theo was curled into Boris' arms accepting his vulnerability in front of one other person (apart from his mother aka the painting), Boris at the same time was also experiencing something he seldom received -- a feeling of power and control and guardianship and the actualization of his physical realness, the use of his body to not just be victimized by violence from his father and then depersonalized but the use of it to protect and care for another. A gigantic relief and comfort and avenue of self-realization for him (bookended in adolescence by his gutsy kiss when Theo left -- acts of bold physical interjection giving him a sense of accomplshment and emotional power... ahem: Shh, Potter).

Boris is the exact opposite of Theo, which is another reason why they likely got on so closely and keenly. They are compliments. Whereas Theo feels relief and freedom in vulnerability, Boris feels no safety or comfort in vulnerability. Boris deeply fears vulnerability as evidenced by: his unrelenting horrific physical abuse by his father, his playful childhood violence used to express emotionality, jerking away fearfully when Theo tries to attend to his wound, becoming ghastly terrified when Theo drowns him, his profession as a gang leader who is highly skilled in physical intimidation and defense weaponry (so much so that he saves both of their lives in the shootout and does in fact get the painting back, even if short-lived), his ultimately flippant and nonvocal reaction to being literally shot, his liberal use of a plethora of a drugs, his aesthetic presentation of imposing nicely cut dark clothes meant to exhibit an intimidating figure/presence, his deleterious dynamics with Kotku (physical violence) and Theo (emotionally fearful), his habit of frequent colorful lying, his theft of the painting likely for some insurance of livelihood as a starving child.

Boris does not feel empowered and safe when he is not in control of his physical body -- Boris feels comfort and pleasure when he is in a position of control and power over himself and others. He has adapted his developmental shortcomings to serve his life in what he sees as a positive way and find peace with it. He leads a gang, he is a wealthy man, he can fix Theo's problems, he says honestly he has a good life.

There is also the question of emotional vulnerability -- again, although Theo is hugely closed off and it is pretty much the premise of the book, when he is most happy and most free is when he is emotionally vulnerable. Theo writes that he, of course, loves Boris. He writes he is happy during their idyllic year together and is more emotionally forthcoming about it than anything else in the book. He becomes jealous over Kotku because she "assumes ownership" of Boris - the person he feels emotionally comfortable and safe with. His love for his mother is an enduring buoy in his life, the painting brings him emotional relief, he falls into Hobie's arms as a derelict child, he frets feverishly over Boris' wounded arm. He is most himself in vulnerability after a lifetime of emotional suffocation.

Boris is also highly distressed by emotional vulnerability, but in context of Boris&Theo, it is Boris who is more fearful of emotional vulnerability as children. Theo cries in Boris arms, seeks Boris out, finds emotional solace in Boris. Boris, unaccostumed to this safety flees it and searches out an eventually toxic dynamic between he and Kotku instead. Boris changes as he grows older: feeling guilt over stealing the painting, telling Theo to value his life - he is philosophical by nature. However this emotional cognizance does not translate to his physical life. In fact it is the other way around: Boris uses that physical power and safety he has cultivated to lend him strength and space and psychological protection so that he can be emotionally self-analytical. Theo has become emotionally hardened until reunited with the painting and Boris, having Boris brings back Theo's physical and emotional freedom.

so yeah, TL;DR Boris.

obviously life and relationships are complex and there is variation in any dynamic but it seems that would be their standard, mimicking their first cuddled childhood moments in a more adult manner (shh, potter). it's a reflection of their dynamic. Theo is open to giving himself physically to Boris (in many small ways) and Boris is upheld and strengthened (and made better physically and emotionally) by that trust. He craves it so much he longs for it for ten years. And that support makes Theo better in return. A positive cycle.

i have such a hard time even imagining Theo topping Kistey like, that poor guy. It must have been soooo dead for him. Kitsey on the other hand would've worn a strap on just so they could have even a little fun until their eventual breakup but Theo's third-eye isn't opened far enough.

#ask #anon #the goldfinch #boreo

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hobiwonder · 5 years

Text

imagine dealing with low libido jungkook bc he's been stressed about exams or smth. smut and very bad crack ahead skzjsksjsk

"for the billionth time, i don't have erectile dysfuntion disorder y/n!" jungkook is pinching the bridge of his nose with a sigh that sounds like he got done doing manual labour. He was so dramatic you almost wanted to twist his nipples. Hm, that might actually help.

"stop looking at me like that you weirdo." he really is looking at you like you're a weirdo when you're just trying to help your bf get a hard on for you. Esp now that you're sitting in his lap without a bra and only a sweater. though he cant tell you're braless. yet.

"are you in to nipple twisting? wait let me try." you're struggling with your cute but not hard at all bf who's fighting you like a baby, swatting his hands at you like you're a fly.

"oh my god. stop! im just tickl- y/n. fuck!" your eyes widen at his exclaimation but lips form a pout when he glares at you.

"that was not sexy. at all. that fucking hurt."

"hey im just trying to help get you a stiffy."

"you did not just say that. i think my dick shrank a few inches." you weren't mad about it if that was the case. his dick needed a bit of shrinking. it was way too big for your poor vagina.

"hey don't pretend to be all hot shit. you used to get hard whenever i said 'tits'. Remember?"

"i might if you show them to me." his greasy smirk should put you off but it only makes you wetter. god damn it. he was too hot even if his dick wasn't feeling it. you tried not to let it get to you especially when he reassured you that it's just stress. But surely your boobs ought to undo his tightly wounded nerves? right?

you didn't want to find out somehow. so you'd resorted to other means to unwound him.

"yeah but tell me," you push him back further against the headboard so he's resting comfortably and not like he's about to pounce on someone like a neandrathal with their fight or flight instincts hightened. he really needed to chill. "how do your balls feel?? heavy?? are you feeling hot all over or getting random hot flushes during the day when you're in class?"

"that makes it sound like i have some chronic illness babe. but no... no tight balls here." he's sighing again. probably just as frustrated. "i'm just stressed 's all." he's shrugging nonchalantly as he rubs your arms in an attempt to sooth your defeated face that looks like a puppy that's been kicked.

"baby," jungkook slips his hands underneath yoir sweat, swearinf under his breath when he finds your breasts bare and rolls the stiff peaks of your nipples gently, "i know you're trying to help and all by feeding me all those pistachio nuts. yeah i know what you're trying to do you little minx."

you would retort. you would. because how dare he be so smug for a guy who cant pop one out for their gf!! but you're too busy trying not to let your eyes roll to the back of your head - instead just moaning gently, breathlessly - as he keeps pinching and gropping your breasts.

"i-im just trying to-ohh," you lose your train of thought for a few seconds there before pushing your chest in his hands again as he watches it rapidly rise up and down. "t-trying to increase your libido you little twink!"

"by feeding me all those nuts?" his eyebrow raise makes it seem like he's scolding you. but it's all in good fun.

"d-duh. so you can feed me your nut. get it?"

your dazed smile is too proud for the dumb joke you've just made but god damn, jungkook wants to kiss the hell out of his goofy girlfriend that he loves more than a good fuck. hm. thats a close second especially if it's with you.

"yes. i get it you little nerd." he's smiling ear to ear and you're leaning forward to kiss his pretty mouth when he imterrupts with a whisper. "can i?"

you're nervous but trying not to show it. it's not like it's the first time he'll be seeing you but there is something nervewracking about being bare infront of him when there is a possibility that maybe it is you. That it's not the stress and just you and your body that just doesnt do it for him anymore. you're not dumb nor oblivious. your boyfriend is too gorgeous for him to not know that fact either and think about what's out there he's missing by being a one woman man.

"hey... you okay? what's the matter?" god bless his sweet, ardent face that's still concerned about you as his hands cup your face lovingly. eyes forcing yours to not stray from his. how were you supposed to not be honest to that face. ugh.

"i just... i don't want to be rejected by the jungcock. i don't think i can handle finding out you find me gross since i gained all this weight."

the worry is still there in his eyes but now a lot wattered down becausw of your word vomit and exceptional ability to make everything less serious with your obnoxious rambling.

"i cannot believe you've named my dick let alone named it 'jungcock'." his eyes are rolling again but his hands have slid down again to the hem of your sweater while his lips fall to your arching neck.

"you are not gross to me silly girl. In fact i think you're the only one who can get me hard by just being funny." his hands have slid furyher down to your hips and in your worry about jungkook finding you unattractive you forgotten what position you both were in. A position that should've made it so much easier for you to feel the hardening length beneath you, pushing up against your damp panties. holy fuck.

"you're hard again oh my god." your dumbass self actually pushes her body up to look down and inspect if his erection is actually real or not while jungkook just rests his back against the headboard to let you have at it. looking up like he's waiting for you to do your thing and not bothering with asking you what you're on about anymore.

"yes. who would've known your unfiltered rambling could get me going than any type of aphrodisiac or porn." jungkook has a shit eating grin on his face but it's his sarcastic tone that has yoir hand squeezing him. and not to make him feel good.

"i was trying to help your noodle, you noodle!" jungkook is muttering under his breath again about shrivelling up at your nickname for his cock.

"but seriously... admit it. it was the pistachios right?? they had you feeling tingling in your dingaling? right?" your face is almost mashed in to his own as you try to have him confess. his bitchass needs to confess that your little trick worked!!

"i am going to literally ignore all of that. so if you can lean back and let me have a look at your tits before my dick shrinks for real, that would be great thank you." he said it like he was ordering food. what the fuck. the nerve of this boy-

"you're so rude. im the one who's not even wet anymore bwcausw of this disrespect." he's hust humming along as he pulls your sweater off finally; tits jiggling slightly as the garment is lifted and so is jungkook's cock. The length just seems to grow ans grow and grow until it feels like he's pushing it in you on purpose. When he leans down to campture a nipple in his hot mouth you cant help but keen as his cock pushes in to a little more. nudging the button of your clit enough to have you arching your back and gushing in your panties.

"sure about that babe? i can feel your hot juices leaking on to my cock. naughty girl."

"it's-... i-its rude to talk with your mouth full." and full it was. with your nipples. he was lickinf and sucking the peaks gently enough to have you writhing on his stiff cock. each swipe of his tongue was laving your tits in his saliva making a mess of you. jungkook liked messy.

"you're going to teach me manners are you now? i might learn if you grind those hips nice and slow on me babe. It's been so long. i need you to show me how badly you've waited for this." he's groping his own genitals heavily as he says 'this' and then pushing your hips down hard on to him making you mewl. you could feel every ridge, every curve of his hot cock searing through ypur sodden panties and god oh god. fucking hell you were so thankful he was able to relax enough to do this. you missed him so much and right now you felt like you were going to die without an orgasm. sure you came plenty of times by yourself. but it was jungkook who you really craved.

"i l-love you jungkook. so much. i d-dont care if you never get hard again after this i j-just- of fuck. I just want you to know i l-love you. i'll buy a s-sex toy or something. o-or get a m-mold of your dick. Oh god." you're crying out like you're about to start sobbing. and jungkook is trying to muffle his laughter by pushing more of your boobs in his mouth.

"babe. i love you too. so much. dont worry about that right now. Just cum for me okay? cum on me. i want your scent all over me."

he's pulling he crotch of your panties aside so your naked cunt can drag all over the thick bulge in his jeans. Just a few more grinds of your clit over his fat erection and you're rubbing your sticky cum all over his jeans.

"that's it baby. let it go. You deserve everything from me and more. i'm going to fuck this pussy so good now. mhm. keep going." he's watchinf between the two of you where you're still dragging your twitching pussy, tears streaming down your face as his hands help you move over him. when you're wincing from the sensitivity; jungkook is flipping you over to lay you down beneath him. he looks like a fucking porn star - hotter even - undoing his belt as he watches you dazed and crazed from just grinding on him.

"ready for me to 'nut' in you?"

you're laughing uglily and know you fucking love jeon jungkook.

a/n: this got too sappy dixjissksjs thoughts??

#jungkook drabble #yoooooooooo i had this idea out of nowhere

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