#im a bit drunk i love women a lot i love you
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¡MASTERLIST!
WORD COUNT - 10.146
GENRE - angst haha | fluff | established relationship!au | CEO!au | slowburn?
CHARACTERS/PAIRING - CEO!jaehyun x orphanage caregiver!fem!reader | nct/wayv
INTRODUCTION - getting into a relationship when you were at the lowest point of your life dragged you down to the bottom. but it dragged the ones you loved as well.
WARNINGS - adoption/being an orphan | profanity (like a lot) | insecurities (major imposter syndrome) | being poor/poverty | panic attacks/anxiety/depression | alcohol consumption | (prescribed) pill intake | lots of dialogue | pet names
TAGLIST - @xxvaelinxx @bbhmystar @actuallynarii @gfksz @jenosbliss
A/N - yikes this one’s a deep one :( the song is track five on the album and track three on the playlist. have fun breaking your hearts :’) (also hi ik it’s been literally centuries but it’s finally here pls don’t kill me (for the rushed end.))
DISCLAIMER - read as you please!! i don’t want to trigger anyone and please lmk if i missed any warnings! i don’t want to be insensitive to anyone's feelings. thank you <3 p.s. this is not proofread and im so sorry for the immense pause.
It wasn’t too far into your relationship when you broke down in front of Jaehyun. You didn’t know why but opening up to him just became natural.
To be fair, you were also a little ways past tipsy.
In fact, you were a bit deep into the soju bottle you had bought while sitting outside of the convenient store when you first met Jeong Jaehyun, himself. Of course, you didn’t know he was the CEO of Jeong Peach Corporation at the time.
Jeong Peach Corporation. A fragrance and personal hygiene corporation company whose audience consists of he’s, she’s, and they’s. The brand as a whole has this certain aesthetic that is appealing to those people. But Mr. Jeong Jaehyun himself also had a certain aesthetic that definitely matched the brand name he built from the ground up. His striking looks and simply the way he carries himself has men and women falling on their knees for him. But it was a little too late for them to capture his heart the way you did.
“Hey you! I can see you looking over here. How ‘bout’chu come over here and I’ll show you a piece of my mind,” you slurred and held up your fist.
He was almost taken aback. Not because he was Jeong Jaehyun and you had the audacity to speak to him like that (again he carries himself in such a humble way that that would never be the option), but he was simply minding his business, walking to his car until he heard the sound of your drunk voice. He was definitely not expecting a drunk voice while he was ready to go home right around midnight.
He chuckled to himself, too amused at the mere thought of you. But it was midnight and this was the darkest the sky was going to get. It was dangerous for you— for anyone— to be out this late, by themselves, downing a bottle of soju. Well, two and a half bottles of the infamous alcoholic drink.
“Who are you? And why are you out here so late? Drunk?” He laughed, tucking his phone into his pocket, slyly grabbing a chair and sitting by you.
“Suffering. It’s tough out here,” you took another shot.
“Hello, suffering. Why are you out drinking soju so late?” He teased. It was easy to get along with you it seemed, the alcohol brought out the extrovert in you.
“Hey! My name is Y/n. Not suffering…. I’m just saying I’m suffering because,” you paused. And he subtly leaned closer to you, wanting to hear the reason why you’re here by yourself, downing the whole damn bottle.
“…. Just because, okay. Now can you please go so I can drown my own sorrows by myself? I don’t need another pity party,” you sobered up for a moment, then went back to pour yourself another shot.
But before you could take the shot, Jaehyun grabbed it from your loopy hands and took the shot instead.
“Hey! You don’t just take someone else's alcohol! That was the last shot too! Now I have to go buy another bottle!” You pushed yourself up from your seat only to be met with the hard concrete ground.
“You shouldn’t be out here this late, miss Y/n,” he said, his voice laid with concern.
“Who are you to tell me that? I don’t even know who you are,” you pouted, still sitting on the ground. He sighed to himself, showcasing his deep dimples, and got up from his chair to help you up. He was going to try and take you home.
“Hey! What the hell are you doing?!” He wrapped his arm around your waist to keep you up.
“Stranger danger! Stranger danger! This man is trying to kidnap me!” You yelled out. Of course, no one would really hear you. Besides Bong Cha— who was a goodie-two-shoes for Jeong Jaehyun and Jeong Jaehyun only— who walked out of the company right after her boss had. She saw the whole thing go down.
“Stop it! I’m trying to help you!” He struggled, since you were kicking and flailing your arms around in order to prevent him from taking you.
“Help me, my ass. What do you want from me? Taking advantage of a poor, drunk, girl just trying to get in my pants? Get off me fucking psycho. My car is the other way,” you kicked some more. And he gave up, placing you on the ground once more.
“Please, Y/n, you have to work with me here. I just don’t want you staying out late. Who knows? You could actually get kidnapped if I don’t help you.”
“How can I trust you? I don’t even know your name. You may be handsome but it’s always the hot ones that are fucked up. More fucked up than me!” You exclaimed.
He sighed and rubbed his forehead. Maybe he should have just left you at the seven-eleven. But Jaehyun just sat on the ground next to you, a good distance away and observed your ridiculous, drunk, figure.
“I’m Jeong Jaehyun,” he started, “now can you please cooperate with me? I’m trying to help you, here.”
You looked up and squinted your puffy eyes at him. “In your damn dreams, you’re Jeong Jaehyun. Like I’d believe that. I may be drunk but I’m not fucken delusional.” Oh, but you were delusional.
You slowly raised from your seat on the ground and walked your way back to your car, which wasn’t actually where you parked it. The man followed you— sorta like a creep— just to make sure you were safe. But on the way to your car (which was not the right way at all), you bumped into Kim Bong Cha herself.
She hadn’t seen her boss behind you because it was a little too dark but she lashed out at you anyway, “Hey! Watch where you’re going dumb bitch.” You were about to pounce on her until he caught you before you had the chance.
“Let me go! Let me at her!”
The girl was shocked to still see her boss shielding her from you. And she felt embarrassed to let him hear the rude words come out of her mouth. Karma’s a bitch.
“I’m sorry, Bong Cha. Please, go home. And don’t discuss this to anyone. I’m just trying to help her,” he explained to his secretary. Ah, so she was his secretary. That makes a lot of fucking sense.
Quietly, she speed-walked to her car leaving the two of you alone again.
“Why didn’t you let me at her? She was being a rude asshole.”
“Y/n. She’s my secretary. And she’s always been like that. But don’t worry about her, okay. Please just let me help you,” he begged. It was too late for him to just leave you on the road.
You sighed, the dizziness was now getting to you.
“Fine. I need to get to my car, though,” you pushed him off of you.
“I don’t think you’re capable of driving right now,” he retorted.
“Then what the hell am I supposed to do?”
And that was how you ended up sitting in the passenger seat of Jaehyun’s luxury car (the one he drove that day was his Aston Martin DB11.)
That was how you first met Jeong Jaehyun.
So much for first impressions.
—
When you woke up the next morning (with a massive headache), you found the CEO asleep on your couch. All in your shitty apartment. And when last night's events finally hit, you felt like the biggest asshole on planet Earth.
Jeong Jaehyun was sleeping on your couch. In your shitty apartment that could definitely not even compare to his lavish lifestyle. You felt embarrassed all over again. God, what the fuck were you thinking?
You tried to clean up a bit before you woke him up but nothing would fix the slightly stained walls and the old furniture he was definitely a foe to.
After you cleaned up the place, he still seemed to be fast asleep, so you decided to cook up some type of breakfast for him. The rusty refrigerator only consisted of greens (that were about to go bad), a carton of eggs, and a gallon of water. Sunny side eggs, it is.
This was for sure nothing he was used to. He was a CEO after all. The CEO of one of the most popular global brands, might you add. Which made the whole situation so much more humiliating.
Whilst you were cooking, you looked over your shoulder because of the squeaking of the couch Jaehyun fell asleep on. You wanted to fall off the face of the Earth.
Quickly you set the eggs into a plate and placed them next to his water you had already set on the table in front of him. He had only been awake for five seconds and he was met with the hospitality of you.
“Mr. Jeong Jaehyun,” you started, “or— no, yeah. Mr. Jeong Jaehyun, sir, I’m so incredibly sorry for the inconvenience I left last night. You did not have to take me home. In fact you didn’t have to stay the night, which was kinda stupid on your part, not that I would ever call you stupid, even though I just did but-” he cut you off. You definitely rambled a bit too much.
“It’s okay, Y/n,” he slightly laughed, picking up the chopsticks from the plate and eating the egg.
You sat in front of the table, too defeated to say anything. Too defeated to even look at him— even in the few minutes he had been awake, he was more prestigious than you’ll ever be. You didn’t care about who he was. You really did, of course, but after the whole mess, you didn’t even want to be in his presence anymore.
“Why are you so quiet, angel?” The pet name made you feel even worse. Why was he being so nice?
You gulped and looked at him.
“I’m just- I’m so sorry about last night. I was just-”
“Suffering?” He cut you off once more.
The fact that he answered you and finished your sentence made you want to crawl up in a ball and never come out. Last night definitely placed number one in your list of horrible nights.
“Uhm… yeah, that. But-”
“Why don’t you eat, love?” This was the third time he cut you off and the second time he referred to you as an endearing person. He acted as if he knew you for his entire life.
“I’m uh- it- it’s okay. I’m not really that hungry so,” you trailed off, looking down at your hands while you played with your fingers. Just then, he shoved his chopsticks in your face. A piece of egg sat on it. He motioned for you to eat.
You quickly turned your head and shook it, pushing his hand back, “No!” You cleared your throat, “it’s really alright, Mr. Jeong.” You really don’t know why you called him that but it just came out. It was probably the nervousness.
“Jaehyun.”
“Jaehyun… It’s really okay. I mean this is also the least I could do- uhm- especially after last night. Also, my house is a bit of a mess, I'm sorry about that.”
Jaehyun noticed the neighborhood and apartment complex you lived in. Of course, Jaehyun was a nice person so he wasn’t going to comment on it but it was obvious he noticed the living situation you were in. But none of it mattered to him. He just wanted to make sure you got home safely.
“Don’t apologize about that, Y/n. Now eat.”
“I have more eggs in the fridge. I can make my own, don’t worry about it,” you felt your face flush with heat. He caved in and shoved the piece of egg into his mouth, still worried about you.
It was awkward for a long time until he finished his food. You took his plate and cup and put it in the sink.
“I’m sorry. Do you want to wash up? Or maybe-” he laughed.
He had a habit of cutting you off, and you’ve only met this man all of eight hours. Most of those hours you were out cold.
“Stop apologizing, love,” he smiled at you, dimples on full display.
“I’m sorry-” you cut yourself off this time. He laughed again. You were cute.
“I actually need to go to the bathroom. Could you show me where that is?” He asked. You nodded and pointed him down the hall to the left. He quickly thanked you and made his way.
Right when the bathroom door closed, you ran into your bedroom and plopped, face first, into the sheets. How degrading that was.
When Jaehyun was done using the bathroom he got out and called your name which made you scurry out of your room to meet him from behind. You forcefully smiled and waited for what he was going to say.
“Your car is still at the convenience store.” Your fake smile dropped as you scrunched your nose, remembering how he drove you home.
“It’s alright. I’ll walk there later. It’s no problem.”
“But-” this time you were the one to cut him off.
“You’ve already done so much for me. I owe you my life,” you joked.
He playfully scoffed and walked toward you, now directly in front of you,“Just let me drop you off. It’s a far walk.”
“I can Uber or take the bus. Really, everything is okay. I don’t need you to help me anymore. You helped me more than I needed last night and I owe you everything I have.” You were so stubborn. He wouldn’t give up, though.
And there you sat in the same passenger seat as last night.
“I’m going to wash up at my house first. Is that alright?” He looked over to you while at a red light. You had been looking out the window before he said that.
“Of course. Take all the time you need. I’m in no rush.”
—
You underestimated the home Jaehyun lived in. It was pure luxury. Fenced-in house with a security system (that, alone, probably costs more than your apartment), green upkept grass, and a beautiful white exterior and interior that screamed majestic, mature, and regal. It made your home feel like a shit-show. It made you feel completely horrible about yourself.
“Please, come inside,” he opened the passenger side door for you.
Shakily, you unbuckle the seatbelt and exited his car. And he just sweetly smiled at you the entire time. It made you want to cry.
He led you to the front door with his hand hovering the small of your back. You could feel the heat of his hand through your shirt. You took off your shoes and followed him inside.
It was very bright and very aesthetically decorated. With plants (which you weren’t sure were fake or not), paintings that you had never seen before, and knick knacks that seemed too expensive for you to even touch. But he led you past everything in his house and went straight into his bedroom. He had a whole couch and side chairs as well as a fireplace. It was just as grand as the rest of his home.
“Uhm, you can sit on the bed if you’d like. Or the couch, I don’t know. But I'll be done shortly. Please, make yourself comfortable,” he held your arm, informing you. But you were too stunned to speak, so you nodded your head instead.
You sat on the couch, it was a little weird for you to sit on his bed when you barely knew anything about him (and he barely knew anything about you). Plus, you were too busy gawking at his house. And it made you feel self conscious again. It made you feel small; like you didn’t belong. Which you didn’t. So you don’t know why Jaehyun seemed so comfortable with you.
He came out of his bathroom— that was attached to his bedroom— buttoning up his shirt with damp hair. He took as quick of a shower as he could, to not keep you waiting. And through the reflection of the mirror, he could see you with your head facing down again, probably playing with your hands.
“Y/n, love,” he called out. You whipped your head around to his voice, not expecting that to escape his lips.
“Can you please help me button this?” You don’t understand why he called out to you as if you were his lover. Or at least someone he was comfortable with. Couldn’t he see that you were a bit lost?
You sighed to yourself and wiped your palms against your pants, hesitantly walking up to him.
Carefully, you buttoned up the rest of his shirt and looked up at him. He was already staring at you with all the love and adoration in his eyes. Of course, you didn’t realize this at the time. Jaehyun himself didn’t even realize it.
He then handed you his tie, “I hope you can tie a tie?”
You’ve tied many ties in your time of working at the orphanage.
—
Warm Hearts Orphanage held a prolonged special place in your heart. You’d been going to the orphanage as far back as you could remember. The orphanage held children from infants to teens. And everyone there was like family. Even though your little family didn’t have much, it always warmed your hearts to give back to children who were less fortunate than you were. And though you grew up poverty stricken, these children suffered more than you did and all you wanted was to help them.
You’ve seen children come and go, and the thoughts that always come to you is that they lived a happy life. Everyone in the orphanage deserved it. Even the sourest of apples, because all they wanted was to be loved by a family.
That being said, the orphanage always planned surprise parties for those children who had been adopted. It was a nice tradition, and you’ve helped many children get ready to graduate from Warm Hearts into a family that will love them.
—
“I can.”
As you were doing up his tie he slowly raised a hand to pat down your hair. The action made you pause your movements. Then, you realized everything that was going on was completely wrong and inappropriate, so you quickly finished doing his tie and took a step back. Your heart fell to your ass.
“What’s wrong, lovely?” You still felt like you were going to cry.
“I- Nothing. Don’t worry about me,” you fakely smiled again. But, again, it was as if he knew you your entire life because he wiped the pad of his thumb against your lips, making you genuinely frown.
“How can I not worry when you seem squeamish? And these fake smiles plastered on your face. What’s wrong?” He stopped swiping your bottom lip and cupped your face with the entirety of his right hand; thumb rubbing your cheek instead.
You still forced a smile and wrapped your hand around his wrist, bringing his hand away from your face. You felt undeserving of everything he was doing to you. And you wanted to hide your emotions as much as you could.
“I’m okay. You can stop worrying about me. I’m fully capable of taking care of myself,” you released your hold on his wrist and held yours, crossed in front of your body.
This time, with his left hand, he smoothed down your hair and let his hand rest on your face.
“Okay, pretty. If you say so. Now, let’s go get your car, yeah?” You bit your lip and nodded and he led you out of his house with his hands on the small of your back, just like he did when he was bringing you inside.
The seven-eleven you were drinking at just so happened to be located right next to Jeong Peach Corporation. Your car was still parked in the parking lot. And it was still nothing to ever compare to the CEO who was sitting beside you.
You both got out of the car, and he was standing in front of you.
“Thank you and I apologize for last night. But if it weren’t for you, I’d probably be passed out on the sidewalk,” you awkwardly laughed.
“No worries, love. And thank you for your hospitality. I’m happy you’re doing alright,” he responded.
You pursed your lips and pivot your heels to the direction of your car.
“I hope to see you again, Y/n.” Yeah right.
You pivot your heels back to the direction of Jaehyun. The embarrassment of last night and this morning still lingered in your body. There was no way you would see him again. You were from two completely different worlds. And there was no way you were coming back to this seven-eleven.
“I hope so too,” you said bitterly before rushing to your car.
“Y/n!” He said before you could finish shutting your door. You groaned to yourself, stepping back out of your car and facing him again. You wanted to save yourself from the self-bashing already.
“Would you like to… maybe… grab something to eat later?” But damn, he was too nice to turn down. You wanted to say yes so badly, but another part of you wanted to decline. You just didn’t belong in his world.
He was born to an upper class family, you knew that. Everyone knew that. So what would happen if you said yes? You had nothing to offer.
But it didn’t hurt trying, right?
You took in a huge gulp, “…. I would like that.”
“I’m sorry, what?!” exclaimed Danbi while the two of you were washing dishes.
The kids had just eaten and they were now free to do whatever they pleased, whether that was draw, sleep, or take a walk during the good weather.
“Keep it down!” You shushed her.
“I can't! THE Jeong Jaehyun of THE Jeong Peach Corporation asked you out on a date tonight?!” She squealed in happiness for you, making the bubbles fly everywhere.
You told her everything that had just happened within the past twenty-four hours. And she was beyond stoked for you. This was a once-in-a-lifetime opportunity and she knew you deserved it the most. You’d been through hell and back and you’re about to go right back. She knew everything about your situation, you’d both been volunteering here for years so it was only natural to open up to one another.
“No one said anything about a date…. Just a, uh, hangout. Yeah…. a hangout.”
“Y/n, he just met you and he’s head over heels for you already! I’m so excited for you!”
You were excited too. Way beyond excited.
—
Jaehyun said he would pick you up around nine p.m. You had just gotten back from grocery shopping and you now had a little over an hour to shower and get ready. You didn’t even know where he was taking you.
But as you were applying your makeup and looking in your bathroom mirror, everything started shutting down on you. And you were surrounded with nothing but your own, suffocating, thoughts. You were a fraud. But Jaehyun was coming to pick you up soon, so now was not the time to think about it; or at least try not to. Fake it ‘till you make it.
When the knocking on your door signified Jaehyun's arrival, you quickly sprayed some perfume and opened up the door for him.
You were wearing a simple, spaghetti strap black dress with a slit on the side leg and a dark gray blazer with a matching bag. He looked the same as he did when you saw him this morning, except his blazer was now off of his body and he took off his tie which left him with his white button up (which he unbuttoned the first few to give him more of a casual look).
“Are you ready?”
☹ ☹ ☹
I told you I was down bad
You hate to see me like that
Two whole years had gone by and it was almost your third anniversary. Almost, as in, it was six months away. But so much can happen in a mere six months that seem to pass by so quickly.
You were in your apartment, the same crappy apartment you lived in two years ago, crying in your sheets. Your damn thoughts were getting to the best of you again.
And when you didn’t respond to Jaehyun’s phone calls, it was an understatement to say he was worried about you. So he drove to your apartment immediately.
He frantically knocked on your door and almost broke it down until you came to open it, eyes still red from your tears and breath still uncontrollable. Your lover welcomed himself inside and shut the door, holding you so tight yet soft in his embrace in the doorway. He was trying to comfort you with his lips resting on your forehead and his hands carefully cradling your body.
“It’s alright, love. I’m here. Don’t cry. Please. I need you,” he repeated into your hair, rubbing your back and swaying you both side to side. But the action made you cry even more. You didn’t deserve the love he gave to you. Your head rested on his firm chest as you tried to calm down the pain.
“Angel, where are your meds? Are they in your room?”
You nodded as best as you could as he carefully led you inside and into your bedroom. Jaehyun sat you down on your bed before grabbing a glass of water for you to take your pills. You hated relying on him so much. You hadn’t changed. But what you don’t know is that Jaehyun loved you even more than he did two years ago. He loved you because you weren’t afraid to show him such a vulnerable part of the human being you had become. Or so he thought.
You did what you had to do and he carefully pulled you into bed with him. Your head rested in the crook of his neck as he felt your hiccuping breath die down into slumber. He rubbed your back some more, hoping that it would lull you to sleep faster.
You don’t know what you’d do if he wasn’t here. Jaehyun was your everything, as were you to him.
—
When you woke up the following morning, you were still in Jaehyun’s embrace. Slowly, you turned around to check the time and the clock read 5:43
a.m. That was why it was still dark outside.
You turned back around to face Jaehyun and you sadly smiled at him. He worked so hard 24/7 and the purple bags under his eyes proved that. You just wished there was something you could do to help him, just like the various ways he had helped you. Jaehyun has always been there to help. From the day you two met, to this moment, Jaehyun was always your number one.
You shifted around in his arms as he slightly groaned because of the sudden movement.
“I’m sorry, love. Keep sleeping,” you whispered, kissing his closed eyes. He came to your house in his work clothes, though, so you were sure he was a bit uncomfortable. You walked to your wardrobe and found some folded up pajama pants he left over the other night as well as one of his gray hoodies he left ‘not on purpose.’ You gathered his clothes and walked to the bed to wake him up.
“Wake up. If you’re gonna keep sleeping, at least change, love. You’re probably all stuffy in your button up and dress pants,” you lightly shook him awake. He groaned some more before stretching his limbs and opening his eyes. You were the best thing he could ever wake up to.
Jaehyun playfully pulled the blanket over his head and managed to wrap his arms around your waist as you were sitting down beside him. You laughed at his antics and tried to free his grip on you. It failed; and you ended up wrapped under your sheets with him, his comfortable clothes still in your hands.
“What if I don’t want to change,” he challenged.
“You don’t have to,” you teased. “But it’s not going to be my fault when you complain about being uncomfortable.”
His tight hold on you faltered for a moment before he fully released you and took off your blanket from his (and your) bodies. He released a puff and pouted his plump morning lips. The man sighed and got out of bed, taking the clothes you had in your hands and just stripping from his work clothes right then and there.
“Aren’t you gonna change in the bathroom?” You asked, laying back down in bed. So much for getting up.
“Eyy, you know I don’t do that. I’m gonna come back into bed anyway,” he said before climbing in after you and pulling the grey sheet back onto him. As he slid into your bed, you wrapped your arms around his head as he rested himself to be held by you. Jaehyun loved being babied, especially in the early hours of the morning. It was one of the many charismatic features about him.
—
When you woke up the second time that morning, it was only nine o’clock. But Jaehyun seemed to be awake now, cooking breakfast that was sizzling from the kitchen.
Quietly, you sat on one of the stools and stared at him. He was the best thing that ever came into your life.
But why did he openly put himself in it?
You always wondered why Jaehyun stayed. It always turned into panic attacks and crying fits, but you couldn’t help it. He was a part of a completely different social status and you stood out like a sore thumb when you were next to him. It wasn’t like you were ashamed to be his girlfriend; you just thought he was ashamed to have you as his girlfriend.
He should.
There goes those thoughts again.
Unknowingly, you choked a sob which made him turn around. When he saw you, he smiled with pure adoration beaming in his eyes. God, why did he make this so hard?
He shut off the stove and walked toward you, forgetting about the breakfast he was making, it was almost done, anyway. Jaehyun wiped his hands with a towel and walked to you, cupping your face with his right hand, wiping the tear that seemed to fall from your eye.
“Why are you crying, love?” He still held the same, sweet, smile.
“…. I love you.”
He raised you from your seat and just hugged you, lips resting on the crown of your head, swaying you back and forth on the creaky floor.
“I love you more.”
“I’m sorry I’m like this,” you confessed against his chest.
But he immediately raised you from your position, to look at his, now serious, expression.
“Never apologize for something you can’t control. You say sorry all the time, peach. I love that you feel the need to say it, but you really don’t need to say it all the time. Especially in front of me. You know how much I love you, right? For being who you are?” He wiped the baby hairs away from your face.
“You know how much I don’t care how messed up, or whatever you call it, you are, right?”
“…… Of course.”
“Then you should stop being such an amazing person. I don’t deserve you. But here I am,” he laughed, tugging you into his frame once more.
However, you still felt the need to give him the world. You still felt as though you owed him your life, he’d been your boyfriend for almost three years.
And yet you still thought that it was you who didn’t deserve him.
“Now stop crying. You know I don’t like it when you cry. Especially if it’s your damn thoughts that are eating at you.”
You love him so much.
☹ ☹ ☹
I don’t know how you look past
My stupid fucking setbacks
You said it before and you’ll say it again. You’ll say it a million more times; Jaehyun deserved more.
Sometimes, you’ll look in the crooked mirror placed in your bathroom and just think to yourself. Think about all the negatives rather than thinking about the positives. And although there are times you do think about the positives, they all end up with a wretched outcome. And then it’s negative thoughts all over again.
It’s the same routine and you’re growing sick of it. You’ve been sick of it ever since you could remember and you despise people who seem to have it easy. It just seemed as though there was no luck for you. The only luck the universe brought to you was Jaehyun. There are times, though, where you wished you never met him. He was a goddamn CEO and you were a low-class citizen. None of it just made sense.
But you loved him. It just hurts to deal with your true emotions and stow them away from your lover; because you never wanted him to watch what you were going through. Even the thought of it made you want to vomit.
Trauma just came natural to you, apparently. And you absolutely hated it. You just wished you were different, then maybe you wouldn’t feel so guilty about dating Jaehyun. Then he would truly be proud of who you are.
He was already proud of you, though. And he’s told you this a billion times. Your brain just makes you believe that he’s saying it out of pity. He’s only saying it because you’re his girlfriend.
And the cycle continues.
—
You were spending the next couple of days at Jaehyun’s house. It was obvious he didn’t like your lifestyle and wished for you to live with him. You could never bring yourself to do it though; to always rely on him for everything that you do. You were fully aware of what you could and could not do, and you didn’t need him to help you.
Which led you to silently cry away your sorrows in his bathroom. You were taking a bath, in hopes to dial down the overwhelming emotions that engulfed you. Yet here you were, with a flushed face and puffy eyes— the aftermath of a breakdown.
It seemed as though ever since you got into a relationship with Jaehyun, your anxiety only intensified. And that resulted in the thoughts that had been burdening your mind since the day you two met.
Fortunately, he wasn’t home to face the pointless shenanigans that go through your head. So you had enough time to pull yourself together, take your meds, and try to meditate on the balcony that was attached to his bedroom.
The summer nights were cool enough for you to relax your mind before Jaehyun made his way home. You were working at the orphanage the whole day and you managed to pull through the entire day without a single tear, which probably led to the bathroom-breakdown fiasco.
The crickets had been chirping and the wind was starting to blow. That was when you heard the bedroom door open. And when Jaehyun saw the slight movement of the balcony curtains, he knew you were outside doing whatever you do best.
Quietly, the man sighed to himself, placed his work on the side desk and undid his tie. He was finally home. He was finally with you.
Jaehyun opened the sliding door larger than what it was and joined you in sitting on the floor with his legs crossed. At first he let out a long breath and looked out toward the yard which his bedroom was facing. Then, he got tired and shifted toward you.
That happened all in thirty seconds.
Your eyes were still closed as you breathed in. Jaehyun lovingly smiled at you and kissed the side of your head.
“I missed you today, angel,” he broke the silence.
You opened your eyes and shifted your body to face him.
“You say that every day,” you chuckled and played with his fingers. A habit of yours that Jaehyun absolutely adored.
“And it’s always true. I can't wait for the day I get to see you every time I come home.” You felt more guilty that he had the need to say that. And you knew he meant nothing harmful, he was just a caring person and didn’t want you living the life you had. You were better off living with him.
But you joked, “You will. For the next three days. And then I’m off home.”
He groaned and layed back on the cold floor. “Don’t remind me. I want to cherish the time we have now.”
You laughed once more. He was acting as if he didn’t come to see you practically every day. Sometimes, he’ll even leave his job just to come see you at the orphanage.
“Eyy, quit saying that. I’m still here. You come by all the time. Sometimes twice a day. You’ll get sick of me soon, I can guarantee. I don’t know how you put up with me all these years.”
Although you were (partially) joking, Jaehyun sat right up from his prior position and looked at you with his pout and furrowed brows.
“What do you mean, peach? I could and would never get sick of seeing you. Don’t say that.” You were shocked to see him react that way.
You slightly snickered at him and said, “I was joking, love. I’m sorry,” you leaned your head closer to his and placed a little kiss on his lips, to make him sort of forgive you for saying that.
“You better be. I don’t know what I’d do without you, peach,” he kissed back. And pecked your lips repeatedly, several times.
The actions made you laugh out loud and slightly push him away. Jaehyun loved being the reason why there was the brightest smile on your face. So he quietly smiled as your eyes crinkled because of him.
He suggested that you two wash up. However, you already told him you bathed before he came home. And like a child, he groaned and went into the bathroom himself. But he made you promise to wait for him tomorrow. You agreed, because he was your little baby.
As he was in the shower, you cuddled your way into his bed sheets and blanket. The lights were now dimmed and all you were doing was waiting for him to get out of the shower. Hopefully he would be able to beat the slumber that easily pulled you in.
The warmness of the blanket, though, soothed you to sleep and Jaehyun was unable to defeat the unfortunate slumber that casted over you. It was a shame since he wanted to talk to you; ask about your day and what you did. He’d grown used to the look of your puffy eyes, and he knew you’d been crying. He knew you were having a moment the minute he stepped onto the patio. Because the only time you would sit out there was if something was bothering you.
Being the amazing person he was, left you alone, and didn’t ask about what you clearly didn’t want to talk about. He believed that you would open up to him when you were ready. You’ve already opened up to him so much, but nothing would stop him from worrying about you.
Once he got out of the shower and towel-dried his hair, he placed the wet towel in the basket and climbed into bed next to you, immediately clinging to your fatigued figure. God, he would give you the entire world. Jaehyun turned around and shut off the lamp on his side of the bed (yours was already turned off) and hugged you against him, his breath soon evening out to match yours.
And fast asleep he was.
—
The following morning, Jaehyun was awakened with your fingers threaded in his hair and his face squished against your chest. He managed to stretch some parts of his limbs whilst still, practically, laying on top of you.
“Good morning, angel,” he said in his morning voice, “I’m not going into work today.”
As a CEO, you’d expect him to take care of himself (with Jaehyun being his own boss and all) but you didn’t expect him to say he wasn’t going in. Not that you minded, you’d much rather spend the day with him but Jaehyun was a hard-working man, and he rarely took days off.
“I’m not going in for the next three days either. It’s been a while since I took a day or two off.”
“Yeah, but you’re taking four days off, including today. Are you sure you want to do that?”
He was taken aback for a moment. Did you not want to spend time with him anymore?
“There’s nothing wrong with me taking four days off. You appreciate it, no?” He said in the littlest voice which instantly made you regret what you said.
“No, no, no. Oh, I’m sorry my love, I didn’t mean to make you upset. It’s just that you’re so busy with work and it’s just me so you don’t have to-” you rambled.
“And that’s where I’m gonna stop you. You know how much you mean to me, so of course I’m gonna take these days off to spend as much time with you as I can. The company's getting a little busier with a new launch around the corner but I’m sure they’ll be able to survive without me for a few days,” he retaliated.
You sighed, still feeling like an asshole for wording the sentence the way you did. God, could you do anything to make him happy? It felt as though everything you said and everything you did could never satisfy him. Of course, those were just your thoughts.
Jaehyun was happy that you cared about his job, but what he wanted you to realize the most is how much he wanted to be with you. Whatever it was, spending time with you is the best remedy he could ever ask for.
Just why is he never sick of you and your words? You’re sure he would be with how rude you, unintentionally, were to him.
☹ ☹ ☹
When you opened up the door
You let me in when you should have your guard up
Thinking back to the time you finally let Jaehyun crawl through your walls— when he’d let down his walls way before you— the constant feeling of regret and pain constantly filled you. Whether or not the glass was half-full or half-empty, it was always just half. There was never a certain hundred percent yet Jaehyun took his time in letting you trust him as Jeong Yoon Oh.
Thinking back to the time you first met Jaehyun himself, he somehow couldn’t process the red-flag you were oh-so not afraid to show while you were inebriated. He thought you were cute, and the words you were spilling from your mouth, conscious or not, made him feel sort of protective over you. And he didn’t even know you.
It was about ten a.m. when the two of you got out of bed. Ever since the conversation earlier, the air has just been tense. At least for you. You’re sure Jaehyun probably hadn’t felt anything but your brain was constantly playing tricks on you, and this could be one of them.
Your lover is in the bathroom now, as you’re sitting on the bed staring into space with your thoughts locked into your brain. You should apologize. Of course, you want him to stay home with you, but he plays an important role in the economy and in his industry that you can’t help but feel bad for keeping him away from what he loves doing most.
Resting against the headboard, you turn your head toward the bathroom door that was being opened. He walks through and sits back in his spot next to you, although his body is fully facing yours.
“I’m sorry about earlier. I just… I don’t want to keep you here if you have a lot to prepare for your launch,” you sighed and rubbed your eyes.
He laughed, but the feeling of hurt lingered a bit in his eyes as he held the utmost respect to you. “You don’t have to apologize, my love. It’s completely okay. And if they need help, they have my number and it’ll all get fixed with a simple phone call, alright?” He used his right hand to cup your face, rubbing the pad of his thumb against the surface of your cheeks.
You bit your lip in hesitation but you stopped when Jaehyun leaned down and kissed away the bad habit he always noticed you had.
“Let’s make breakfast, yeah?” He whispered against your lips, giving you the biggest puppy eyes ever. You laughed and kissed him one more time before going into the bathroom to get ready for whatever the day was going to bring.
—
Breakfast was absolutely lovely. As it always is whenever you’re with Jaehyun. But for some reason, this morning’s just hit so different.
Today, though, you planned on going to the orphanage just as a surprise visit. Truly, it was your home. Your second home (if you considered Jaehyun.)
“Well, I was planning on getting goodie bags for the kids but… I don’t think I’m gonna. We can just spend the day there,” you were telling him all the things you wanted to do today and the things you wanted to do for the kids there but you were having trouble deciding what to actually do.
“Nah, we can go to the grocery and buy them goodies,” he abruptly said as if it was no problem. Realistically there was no problem. Except you.
“But-”
“No buts. I haven’t seen them in a while, so just consider it a gift from me. Now, let’s finish our food and get some snacks for the kiddos,” he put his plate in the sink as you sighed in adoration (and maybe a little in guilt.)
Grocery shopping with Jaehyun was like grocery shopping with a child. And it was good, because he picked out snacks he thought the children would like, as well as treat bags to put them in. He was a child at heart although he portrayed a stoic and successful CEO.
The two of you sat in his car for an hour in the Warm Hearts Orphanage parking lot packing juices and snacks and candy into the bags before finally walking through the front door.
One of the staff members had seen you and happily greeted the two of you as you walked into the main entrance to the room the kids spent the most. Upon your arrival, all of the children shouted in happiness, greeting you with hugs and questions of the bags that were placed in a cardboard box that Jaehyun was holding.
Giving them out and spending time with them truly warmed your heart as they played the whole day long with Jaehyun.
He was so fond of children and your entire being melts with the sight of him playing with them and catching them up on his launch.
Something about it was heartwarming yet bittersweet.
You don’t know how long you could last anymore.
☹ ☹ ☹
What a painful back and forth, oh
Today was just not a good day. For you and for Jaehyun. He called you in the morning and said he was going to visit you at your apartment when he was done in the office.
Only problem was, it was twelve in the morning when he walked through the door with the extra key you gave him. Your apartment was quiet, excluding the yelling from the thin walls of whichever neighbor.
For the first time since he’s met you, this was the first time he’d actually noticed every little detail about your apartment. From the stained walls to the crack in your window. He felt like he wanted to cry. Jaehyun didn’t want you living like this anymore, that was the truth. And he knew you worked two jobs before committing to the orphanage. He also knew you were never able to pursue college. No amount of scholarships you were given could afford the ungodly university tuition.
And just as he was about to suck up the water forming in his eyes, you walked out of your room, fully awake. You stopped and called out his name. But the ringing in his ears only got louder. And soon he broke down into tears.
You were completely shocked. It was midnight and you didn’t think he would come over because it was so late. But now he’s here, and you don’t know how long he has been standing there, breaking down right in front of you.
“Hey, hey, hey. What’s wrong, angel?” you held him in your grasp as his tears kept coming down.
“Why are you crying? Please tell me, my love,” you pleaded, voice cracking. In the three years you’d known Jaehyun, he was never one to cry. Not one tear. He wouldn’t ever tear up either. So seeing him like this, vulnerable, was both shocking as it is confusing.
“I just…” he sobbed, “I just love you so much. Please don’t ever leave me. I don’t know what I’d do without you.” To you, he wasn’t making much sense but he was still valid to have these thoughts. Some people have their off days and you guessed this was his.
“Of course not, Yoon Oh.” He cried harder, somehow pulling you even closer than before, his head still hiding in the shadows of your neck.
Moments passed by before he finally lifted his head up. He looked so ethereal though he was covered in tears and the image in front of you made you want to cry yourself.
“You’re okay. I’m right here,” you cupped his face with both of your hands, wiping away the tears on his cheek with your thumbs. He does the same to you, although you’re not crying.
“I want you with me forever,” he whispered, searching through your eyes as if he doesn’t know you like the back of his hand.
“I’ll be here.”
You don’t know if you’re lying to him with the response. But only time can tell whether the guilt forever residing in your heart gets the best of you and inevitably, to the best of him. But he’ll get over it right? He’s Jeong Jaehyun after all.
—
You’re now laying side by side on your bed. He is being cradled in your arms as he continues to calm down in the drowsiness of the late hours of the night.
“I’m sorry about breaking down earlier. I just… I don’t know, I just felt super overwhelmed all of a sudden I guess,” he lifted his head up to look at your moonlit face.
You shook your head and stroked his hair. “Don’t apologize. You deal with me all the time,” you dryly chuckled.
“Because I know what you go through… But thank you,” he rubbed your back.
“For what?”
“For being there for me when I need you most. I really appreciate it…” he trailed off for a moment, “I really appreciate you.”
“Please…” he continued, “Come live with me.”
You don’t know if it was sympathy, pity, pure love, or all of the above. But Jaehyun was very much aware that he could treat you like a queen. Which he already does, and that makes you all the more hesitant.
“You know that-” you’re cut off.
“I know. I know you refuse to but please. You’re my entire world, Y/n. I can’t even explain to you in words how much you and your entire existence means to me,” he’s desperate now. So desperate to finally have all of you. So, so desperate to watch you flourish into the beautiful bouquet he knows you are.
You sigh and continue to wrap your arms around his broad shoulders. “I’ll think about it.”
But the both of you knew the true meaning behind those words. Yet neither of you can say a word.
☹ ☹ ☹
It’s hard to ignore all of my problems
You couldn’t even count all of the imperfections and impurities that you had hiding within yourself. So much so, that you seem to project those imperfections onto the people around you. To the people that you love.
And sure, they might not notice them— ignore them, in fact— but they are clearly written out right in front of you and they don’t ever seem to go away. Which is probably why they say ‘you are your greatest enemy.’ It was true.
Yet of course, these thoughts had to swarm your mind at the grocery store. Grocery shopping, for crying out loud. With Jaehyun and with bunches of people who are too nosey to not look at you and not whisper to themselves as to why you are crying.
With the shopping cart full, Jaehyun pulls it over to the side so as to not create traffic, and pulls you closer to him by your arms.
He pushes the hair out of your face and leans down to see you. All of you.
“What’s wrong, my love?” He shushes you and wipes the tears off your cheeks.
This was absolutely terrible. Even the most domestic and everyday tasks were a hassle. And you felt like you were burdening Jaehyun in the busy market that only the wealthiest people had shopped at (since you were staying over Jaehyun’s again for a few days.)
“Nothing, it’s- I’m okay,” you sucked in a breath and wiped your tears before looking up at him to meet his worried gaze.
“Are you sure?” He squinted his eyes.
You took in another breath before nodding.
“One hundred percent sure?” He patted your flyaway hairs down. You nodded again.
“I need words, angel. To make sure you’re okay. Really okay.”
“I’m okay, I promise,” you try to give him your best smile.
He only responds with the softest kiss to your forehead.
“I need you to be with me,” he whispered against your skin.
“I am. One thousand percent. I’m okay,” you whispered back, now getting self conscious of the scene of you and Jaehyun canoodling in a grocery store on a Wednesday at eleven a.m.
He believed you, however the rest of the shopping trip went by slowly, awkwardly, and quietly.
You wished you could change the way you think.
☹ ☹ ☹
Cause I'm no good (Ooh), you could do better (Ooh)
You should walk out, it's now or never
Ninety-nine percent of couples argue. Those statistics are completely true. No matter how often or how little, couples everywhere have their fair share of fights.
You and Jaehyun are one of those couples that rarely fight. Today, however, had not been very good to the both of you. Stress, anxiety, and more stress were eating at the both of you and now it landed you here. Just great.
“I don’t need you constantly taking care of me! I’m perfectly fine on my own!” You shouted toward him.
“Clearly you’re not if you break down every other day! I just want you to be okay,” he lets go and sits on one of the chairs in the living room. His face is hiding in his hands as he feels the anger and disappointment run through his brain.
Noticing this reaction, you sigh and furrow your eyebrows. It’s silent for a fleeting moment. “Why? You know I’ll be okay.”
You sit on the couch, opposite of the black leather chair Jaehyun is sitting in.
“I know how much you’re hurting. And I don’t ever want you to feel those terrible feelings ever again. I want to be here for you and I want you to know that I want to be here for you. Can't you understand?”
It isn’t too much after he let out those words that you feel the tears fill up the sockets of your eyes and the void of the room. The walls that had now captured the two lovers screaming at each other now hear the abundant silence between them.
“I can't give you anything. You do so much for me and I’m just here.”
“I don’t care. No materialistic thing could ever compare to you just being here with me.” He gets up and sits next to you, making sure you know he’s with you the entire way.
“But it’s not enough.”
“Yes it is, Y/n. And I don't know what else to say to get through that thick head of yours. I love you for being you. And I love you for accepting me for who I am, not who I need to be. I don't need you to offer me anything besides your love.”
“That's the thing. I can only offer you my love.”
“I don’t care! Y/n, you need to realize how much you affect me. And I can't let you go around saying those words because they hurt me. It genuinely hurts me to hear those words.”
“…. I'm sorry.”
“Y/n, you truly don’t know how much you help those around you?”
It was silent for a moment.
“You work in a damn orphanage, for crying out loud! For fun. And it just makes me appreciate you. Appreciate how much you enjoy the happiness of other people. It’s all I could ever ask for.” He wiped the tears falling from your eyes.
“Please don’t cry. I just need you to know how much I love you. Why can't you see that? Do you not love me anymore?”
With zero hesitation, you released his hand from your face and stood up, “No! Don’t say that! Of course I still love you!”
“… it’s just that…”
“Don’t even say it, Y/n.”
The gloomy night has come to an end. And yet Jaehyun will not— will never— leave you behind.
☹ ☹ ☹
Gonna regret being too honest
Callin' it love, but this isn’t fallin'
It’s the following morning. It is truly a gloomy morning, in fact. The rain was slowly pouring, the wind was rustling against the trees, and the upcoming fog coming from the ocean was painting the neighborhood.
The minute you woke up in Jaehyun’s arms, you remembered the fight the night prior. And, God, did you feel like an absolute ass.
Could this be it? It’s been three years and yet the question still lingers. Just why? It seems as though you bring him so much pain and yet he has chosen nothing but enduring the repercussions of your wrath.
You gradually regained the strength to get up and without a minute to spare, you quietly escaped out of Jaehyun’s protective arms to make breakfast. Some sort of remedy to help heal the pain of last night's argument.
You sat on one of the island chairs waiting for the food to cook in the oven. Slowly but surely, you were once again trapped in your thoughts. Were you being too harsh? Were you being too honest? Were you actually enough to be with the most amazing man on planet Earth?
All of these questions were paused by the padding of feet coming into the kitchen. You look up at him, not expecting anyone else. And in his dazed glory, Jeong Yoon Oh was still the most precious human being that had ever entered your existence.
“I’m sorry,” is the first thing you’re able to say before finally crying. Crying the waves of emotions that you felt the night before yet did not physically show.
He didn’t say a single word. He didn’t have to. All he did was take you in his embrace and whispered apologies and sweet nothings into your ears. The rest of the morning went by with stuffy noses and quiet munches.
—
“I’m sorry about last night,” you apologized once again, sitting on the bed watching him get ready through the mirror.
“It’s okay. I’m sorry too. I just want you to know that you can lean on me. You’ve been able to lean on me for years now…. I didn’t mean to yell but desperate times call for desperate measures,” says Jaehyun.
“But I'm not desperate at all, you know that.”
“Yes but don’t you know I’m so desperate for you?”
#[the ruptured series]#nct#nct 127#nct dojaejung#nct jaehyun#nct 127 jaehyun#jung jaehyun#jeong jaehyun#nct angst#nct fluff#nct au#nct x reader#nct blurbs#nct scenarios#nct imagines#nct 127 imagines#nct 127 angst#nct 127 scenarios#jaehyun x reader#jaehyun fluff#jaehyun angst#jaehyun au#jaehyun imagines#jaehyun scenarios
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if you ever want to talk about your thoughts on joyce .. Peeks over the corner of your blog. i love talking and hearing ppls thoughts on joyce sooo much even if they're different from my own!! and your analysis and stuff is always so well thought out
i hope u dont mind if i answer this publicly to take advantage of th request nd get my ideas out ther (also tyvm im happy u like my insane takes on these idiots, iv ben thinking abt them for almost 10 years)
i said a lot here so gnna 'read more' it
iv ben building trans charlie n my head fr, like i said, nearly 10 years. i used to view him as cis bcuz i always try to take as much frm th source material as i can wen i craft my HCs nd i had v personal (stupid) hangups insofar as him explicitly referring to his junk multiple times nd bottom surgery simply not being on my radar as a naive littl trans idiot deep in th sauce tht transmen oftn fall into w phallo being viewed so so poorly
evn still i leaned towards transmasc charlie nd always lovd moments tht let me imagine, for a moment, it being true, like his discomfort w taking off his shirt [hundred dollar baby, charlie kelly: king of the rats, the gang exploits the mortgage crisis, young charlie and mac deleted scenes, etc etc etc], or bonnie yelling abt ppl stealing her "charlie-girl" [the waitress is getting married] which i lovd to see as her accidentally misgendering him while drunk off her ass.
having grown out of my phallo issues (nd if ur reading this and u still view phallo super poorly, please do some research and grow too), ive in recent years fully subscribed to transmasc/nb charlie, and view his timeline something like this:
baby -> elementary: charlie refers to himself as a boy, doesnt "come out," simply has no idea he's afab. bonnie lets him dress however he wants and refers to him as asked. when charlie gets confused about his genitals, bonnie says his dick will grow in later lol, makes charlie wear a dress in public restrooms and tells him its just a game
middle: puberty hits and charlie gets confused and scared. bonnie puts him on blockers w.o explaining them ("my mom used to vaccinate me like every month" [the gang gets quarantined]) charlie goes on content and oblivious. STP acquired because hes "a late bloomer" and his dicks still not growing in?? weird. confides this in mac once, but he doesn't understand.
high: charlie finally registers that he's trans after forgetting theres a health class 1 day and not being able to skip it. throws him for a loop a bit but he becomes actively invested in his goals. he gets to start T and wants to have surgeries. "what guy hasnt done some extensive research on his own genitalia?" [mac is a serial killer]
college (aged): able to surgically transition (ty medicare) and continues on with life as we kno him now
joyce, imo, fits neatly into these views.
as a transmasc nb who came out young nd prefers to be seen as just A Guy by strangers, i grew up v vehemently against anything girly that might get me misgendered, but th more i began to 'pass,' th more @ home n my body i felt, th more and more comfortable i am w femininity, th more i wdnt mind putting on a dress, as long as th general public wd see me as "a man in women's clothes." n my mind, i prescribe something not exactly th same but v similar to charlie.
i see charlie "i dont really identify" kelly as afab and nb. i see joyce as a "character" he originally created to distance himself from the dysphoria of putting on a dress as a young trans boy, but that became part of him as the hard lines he drew in the sand as a child became blurry with age and self acceptance. charlie's comfort with himself allows joyce to evolve into a more solid persona, one he enjoys embodying and allowing to become a permanent facet of who he is. he's ok with being referred to as either. they're both him.
so maybe joyce comes out a bit more outside of the bathroom now.
#ask#pariskim#charlie kelly#joyce kelly#ramblings#i hav lots of thoughts nd feelings nd smday ill draw out charlie's whole timeline th way iv ben meaning to#th same way charlie holds th gang togethr charlie holds my whole viewpoint of iasip togethr#i gave myself a headache writing this post i spent more time xplaining my years of tboy charlie thinking than joyce im sry lmao#but i do lov her
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Truly heartbreaking to see so many young fans - majority of them being girls - not sending support to Caiti, Shelby, Andi and to everyone else coming forward with their stories. You should always support the victims, even if the abuser is someone you like/stan a lot.
Your favorite uwu white boy streamer could literally have done this to you.
YOU DONT KNOW THESE MEN! The one you see on camera is only a persona, THATS IT. They are grown ass adults, they should know better. Why are you playing a drinking game with someone you assumed was 21? You should check that shit. It LITERALLY takes two seconds to check that info. You said that one of her friends had a 21+ bracelets and assumed she was 21 too. Im fucking sorry but that’s dumbass logic , you are a literal 27 years old man friend with a 24 yo and a 23 yo. Ur own group of friends has a 3-4 years age gap difference. Just bc one of Caiti’s friend is 21 that doesn’t mean anything. And even if Caiti was actually 21 when it happened, the behaviour was still creepy asf. Why are u cuddling and putting ur hand under her shirt to this girl you just met?
For people sending shit to Caiti bc she didn’t say anything at the moment, while she already explained her point of view a bit on Twitter - even if she shouldn’t have to- I want to add to that a bit. We heard thousands of stories where women said no to men and they still physically abused them. Put yourself in her shoes for a goddamn second, she’s 18 and drunk in a room with two grown ass men that she doesn’t know well, she only know their online persona. She doesn’t know how they’ll react if she says no.
It might be a stretched idea for some of y’all, but I’m basing this on women experience with those types of situations. In a lot of cases, when you say no, worse things can happen. More violence can happen.
Im sending support and love to all the victims and wish them to heal well. You are all strong coming out with your stories against those men with gigantic fandoms.
P.s : before anyone tells me that I also don’t know these women streamers, I prefer defending and supporting a « potential » victim than a potential abuser, but that might just be me.
#georgenotfound#dreamwastaken#sapnap#punz#caitibugzz#fuck dteam#support shelby#support the victims#support caiti
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how the fruity four would eat you out<3
( just a random blog bc im wanting to get my mind off of something.)
stevie
steve is the king at eating pussy.
he’s so messy with it! spitting on your pussy, just imagine how messy he would get if you squirted all over his face😻
he knows how to work everything, where the clit is, where the g-spot is, he knows it all.
he will love to watch your face as you cum, or when your to drunk off his tongue just watching how your face scrunches up with pleasure when your getting close.
he’ll def mock you a bit
”yeah baby?” “ i know let it all out” “ oh yeah? good girl”
he knows how to make you fall apart just from some simple words.
praises the hell out of you!!
“ you’re doing such a good job baby” “ that’s it, good job honey.” “ your taking it so fucking well “ “ my good girl”
god, he’s so perfect and beautiful. watching his fingers disappear in your cunt.
he loves when you tug on his hair pushing him deeper and deeper into your pussy.
honestly you get jealous bout how good he is, sense he’s done it with a lot of chicks.
eddie
he’s not really experienced with eating anyone out.
but still does that man know how to fucking use his tongue.
i feel like he would be a mixture of degrading and praising.
he just can’t help but call you a good girl and tell you how well your taking his fingers and tongue, but also telling you how much of a slut you are.
he’s picked up on slapping your pussy/clit?
he’ll be licking your entrance then moving his fingers away from your clit which he was rubbing on, and just slaps your pussy gently.
watching you yelp out, and jump at the soft impact, it’s soft but surprising.
he loves to suck on your clit like a piece of hard candy 😻
if he’s upset? he’s in between your thighs, if your upset? he’ll be between your thighs ( only with your consent tho), had a long tiring day? he’s between your thighs listening to you complain about your boss, or with school.
loves watching your face.
he also loves to gently bite your pussy lips🤭
he loves making you squirt, once you’ve done it he’s making you drink more water. he loves adding more stains onto his bed bc of it.
robin
she’s never ate anyone out, not a single person in hawkins.
she’s shy at first, but if you tell her what you like, and what feels best, she feel better about it<3
loves to just lick and lick and lick at your clit.
she will sometimes feel bad if she accidentally overstimulates your pussy.
” oh baby i’m so sorry” “ i know it was on accident baby” “ poor baby i’m sorry i know she’s sensitive”
loves to give your clit a little kiss.
when she first started giving your clit a kiss before eating you out, you didn’t think anything of it.
but now you find it so fucking sexy and adorable at the same time.
this women. fucking. WORSHIPS. and i mean it, WORSHIPS YOUR PUSSY. ( and you ofc💋)
she’s always holding your hand when she eats you out. feeling you softly squeeze her hand when your close.
she loves to praise you, just imagine her calling you a good girl with her fucking sexy raspy voice AAAAA-
when she’s able to get you to squirt she’s speechless. she’s just staring at you in shock, cause she wasn’t expecting you to squirt. and it’s just the cutest thing ever
nancy
she’s shy like robin but hell does she know how to eat pussy good.
she loves to praise you and just degrade you at the same time
” god you’re such a messy girl for mommy, yeah?” “ my messy slut” “ you’re such a good girl for mommy!” “ yeah? you want mommy to keep tongue fucking your hole baby? yeah?”
god she has a def mommy kink.
she loves hearing you whimper and moan mommy while she’s just licking and sucking your clit like candy.
she loves to overstim you, just watching how tears fall down your cheeks gripping her hair as she’s eating you out into daylight comes.
loves teasing you by doing little kitten licks on your pussy lips leaving you begging for her tongue.
she could eat you out forever, even though her jaw would start to hurt she would never ever stop.
she loves watching you squirt, rubbing your clit watching little dribbles of squirt leave your pussy watching you twitch and tremble from the aftershocks of your orgasm.
god i want them all to fuck me😻🧎🏻
#nancy wheeler smut#robin buckly smut#steve harrington smut#eddie munson smut#stranger things eddie#steve stranger things#stranger things smut#stranger things#stranger things nancy#stranger things robin#smut#the fruity four
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Pale Goblins (and friends) as dril tweets
Cherrypop: just found out about Object Permanence… why didnt any one tell me about this shit
Biscuit: drunk driving may kill a lot of people, but it also helps a lot of people get to work on time, so, it;s impossible to say if its bad or not,
Flopsy: awfully bold of you to fly the Good Year blimp on a year that has been extremely bad thus far
Sporghog: sending my most powerful kisses to all pregnant women fire fighers
America: IF THE ZOO BANS ME FOR HOLLERING AT THE ANIMALS I WILL FACE GOD AND WALK BACKWARDS INTO HELL
Bagnut: oh you say you’re going to fuck me? you’re going to try to fuck me, through the computer? Well i say this, and that is “Game on”
Peckersnot: the only A+ i ever got was from that time in art class when i drew venus & serena willaims clobbering the. shit out of me with their rackets
Doglick: how do i get cowboy paint off a dog
Tatty Bo Jangles: “jail isnt real,” i assure myself as i close my eyes and ram the hallmark gift shop with my shitty bronco
Ramjam: i lvoe and cherish all of the girls of this site, and other websites. you all become my wife more and more with each passing day. Thank you
Gashwad: id love to get attacked by a bird. id love for a bird to try to fight me. id love to smash it to bits with my bare hands.
Toadswallow: i regret to inform you, that by resorting to Swear language, you have forfeit this debate. Farewell my bitch
Snatchragged: if a sniper shot me i owuld run over to where he is and kick the gun out of his hand and kill him because hes not specialized in melee fight
Bubbleyum: what would you do if i unlocked 100% of my true brain? Nothing. you would be fucked
Lewdtube: do not be afraid to talk to that lonely boy on the train … with the rosy red cheeks, sun glasses & big cigar… he just mmight be… angel
Bluntmunch: another day volunteering at the betsy ross museum. everyone keeps asking me if they can fuck the flag. buddy, they wont even let me fuck it
Kittycough: two handfuls of kitty litter taken from the beautiful hollywood home of sports broadcaster Dick Vitale , for $100 or best offer
Breastbiter the Chonk: joke’s on you; i actually love being body slammed by one dozen perfect wrestlers. and my mouth isn’t filled with bloodm, it’s victory wine
Liberty: DOCTOR: you cant keep doing this to yourself. being The Last True Good Boy online will destroy you. you must stop posting with honor ME: No,
Slaygarrrrrr Who Slavishly Slays: my name is “ GAMER FUCKER ” and i was sent to FUCK all the gamers…
Flopsy (again): awfully bold of you to retweet my “bad year” tweet on a year that has been extremely good thus far
Avery: strongest blade in the world, howeve,r it is so fragile as to shatter when handled by any force other than the delicate touch of a lesbian .
Snowdrop: Im the only man here who injects himself with a CIA Grade Truth Serum before each and every post i make. Remember only that
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IYWBW: Bonus chapter: Candy
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Summary: Candy's thoughts
Warnings: Drug use, slight smut, feelings (eek!), sex work, im just gonna say dub con because she's not exactly thrilled with this part of sex work.
Immersibility: Reader is Latina, had curly hair, fem
AUTHORS NOTE: Because I am a shitty writer, the smut from last chapter came off to a lot of people as a threesome. I edited it so the Santi's bits are in italics and i think its more clear. The scene was meant to portray two DIFFERENT scenes.
**************
As Candy did a long line, the party in it's height, she was thankful this was a perk of the job. She'd already fucked 3 men tonight and then of of the other girls at the party while a group watched and christ, she was gtting tired. The drug began to pulse through her veins, however, giving Candy renewed vigor to finish the last stretch of the night. She had been able to take a breather, thank god, and was having a few drinks and a few lines, occaionaly chatting with the men and other women, most of whom she knew.
The girls liked Candy because Candy stood up for herself and for them, offering a layer of protection in a harsh world. Things could be dangerous in this line of work, women were killed all the time, but it'd not like Candy had a lot of options. She needed to get out. She needed to get a visa and go to America. She needed to get Javi something him and Santi could use.
What she'd do there, she wasn't sure, but it had to be better than this.
If her work only consisted of men she chose coming to her apartment when she chose, it would be a good job. Candy didn't mind her work most of the time and there were men like Javi and Santi who made it fun. That was good.
However, that wasn't paying the bills, so Candy had to attend these parties.
Another line of coke. She was aching and needed at least one more fuck from a rich man if she was going to be able to afford an air conditioning unit this summer. With air conditioning, she was more likly to get clients during the hot months; no one wanted to fuck in a muggy apartment in mid-july.
Javi would come either way, she knew.
Despite the fight, they had been able to repair things and her and Javier were back to normal, having excellant sex she got paid for. Santi too, although the sex was different, it was still just as mind blowing. Santiago reminded her of a little puppy, desperate and eager and wanting so badly to please... and please he did.
She tried so hard with those two not to fall, but it was hard. Santiago was so sweet, so adoring, so fucking good. Javier was strong, gentle, passionate. Both of them made her feel safe and loved. Sometimes, when she was lonely and tired and a little drunk, Candy would fanaticize about what a life might be with either of them, if they wanted kids, what they would be like as her husband.
She couldn't be that far off, could she? They both cared about her, that much was obvious. Especially with Santi, he was so open, so loving, so adoring as he looked up at her with those big brown eyes with his mouth devouring between her legs... did he want her outside of this?
And Javi, the night he made up with her and brought her the Audry Heffburn poster... he hadn't paid her, he hadn't fucked her, he simply fingered her until she came three times on his soaked hand and tucked her safely into bed... would he want a life with her, where they could fuck every night and she could make him the food he was always munching on when stressed?
Hands wrapped around her waist.
"Hola, Candy, I havn't seen you hardly all night." Martin Lorea, the drug lord that her two favorite clients were after, and a frequent client of hers. His hands lifted up her skirt and slipped two fingers under her panties, feeling her soaked folds.
"Mmmm" Candy liked the way he touched her, it was no Javi, but it did feel like. "I've been busy."
"I can feel that." Martin references the cum dripping out of her. "Better do one more, bebita." He leans around her, cutting up the last of the coke into two lines and doing one himself. "I've got lots of plans for you tonight. Don't worry, I'll make it worth it."
He would. He always paid well, liking to flaunt his wealth. Candy did one last line, feeling everything become less and less clear around her, and she barely felt it as he bent her over the table a little too roughly and her face pressed into the wood.
Her skirt was lifted in front of all the party goer, and Candy did her best to put on a preformence.
She had to get out of here, and the only way was to find out information from Lorea to give to Javi.
**************
Yeeeeesh. That was a little dark than I intended. Don't worry, candy is okay! I'm trying to find a blance between not like, demonizing sex work, because this is a sex work safe blog, but also being honest about the realities of being a prostitute in Colombia in the 70's. its not always pretty, in fact its often ugly.
ANYWAY! My belovedest Fen and I are working on the next chapter and it's gonna be a goodie!
I'm doing what I do best, HIGH DRAMA! And Fen is gonna deliver some of the BEST smut with baby santi and his mommy issues.
This is a v smut focused series but im lowkey a little smut burned out and i got a lot of project im trying to wrap up so fen is being amazing and helping me. Plus, this particularly smut is riiiiiiiiggghhhttt up their ally. If you like subby men, check out fens great work at @my-secret-shame-but-fanfiction esp fics like Trine, with subby! blue jones and Good Boy with steven grant
thank you for you're continued support! Only a few chapters left <3
I have a triple frontier fic my dark account, Room's on fire, with a totally different characterization of santi <3
Notes are going down with is fine but its kinda tiring doing all these tags and then people dont respond at all so if you can give me at least a like to show your still her or a comment, ill know to keep tagging you <3
I have a update blog now too, @romana-updates
@runa-falls @lunar-ghoulie @campingwiththecharmings @whatthefishh @persephone-girl @criticalarchitecture @not-a-unique-snowflake-blog @beelzebeth87 @pimosworld @millerscoffee @heareball @thatwonderouswoman @poolb @meveispunk @lovable-liar @millllenniawrites @read-and-wip @missdictatorme @the-fox-den @milkymoon2483 @k-ra @ramblers-lets-get-ramblin @rosellacwrites @legendary-pink-dot @dreamingofbucky @englandsgray@starsthatwatch @fairlyang @alwaysmicado @theywhowriteandknowthings @casa-boiardi @lostfleurs @ninebluehearts @puglover12 @sub-aro @laiisleitte @itspdameronthings @heareball @comfortlessjoy @csarab615 @bit-dodgy-innit @stevngrant @kirsteng42 @mrsjavierp@nanfafnan @lovable-liar @axshadows @cookielovesbook-akie
#iywbw#triple frontier#triple frontier fanfiction#narcos#narcos fanfiction#javier peña#santiago garcia#if you wanna be wild
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Yandere Banda Sunato x Reader - Play you
Notes: yandere themes - violence - manipulation - emotional abuse - murder - DARK - NON-CON - DARK BANDA - physical abuse - stalker Banda -
Banda picks you as his next victim because you have something he cant describe about yourself. He just likes you, he has these morbid dreams of you screaming for help as he attacks you when you leave work at night (why do you keep passing by that dark corner?). He laughts at how stupid and scared you look when you feel his eyes on you the entery walk to your home.
Banda will do his work and get your schendelure. From days to weeks. He knows what you do at every hour and with who you are. Banda will let you be free for a couple of days till he decides its a good time to kindapt you.
When he does he even leaves a fake email with your apparent words of wanting to go and visit new places.
He gets you at night, when you ordered food and instead he shows up, dreased as the delivery man with blood on his face and that empy smile.
He will keep you in a house apart from the big city or in a aparment complex where he knows no one asks couestions.
For some days he justs gives you food and water, does not talk to you or answer your questions. As day pass he will show you how no one is looking for you (thanks to his email) so he can break you and then take your pieces to make a new you.
But you, were smarter. For each piece he collected from you a part of your sanity stayed.
As time passed and Banda saw how subimisse you had become he started to give you freedom.
He let you shower, gave you proper meals and let you sleep in a bed.
With him, you had to hide very well how uncomfortable you were while sleeping being hug by him. Or during the days when he would kiss you and touch you.
Your plan was simple, fake your love for him and once you get him distracted enought kill him or attempt to. The news were talking about him, about how he killed 4 women and was now hidding.
Banda made you believe he did not do such a thing. That the police needed someone to blame and saddly he was there in the wrong moment.
You smiled and said that "of course i believe, you have been nothing but good for me" then will cuddle him, tremblingn a bit and when he asked about it you simplely said "if because im near you, i get such a happines that makes me tremble".
The next days you took notice on how Banda had been letting you be more on your own (inside the aparment, seeing the light of the day was still a dream), but now he would let glasses out, knifes he uses to cut the meat so perfectly by the reach of your hand.
You knew he had a cellphone and that he uses fingerprints as his password, so you plan on using that to contact the police once you kill him.
Was it messed up? Yes it was, part of you did die when Banda tortured you for these weeks, other part of you stayed strong enought.
But there was a darker part, one that kept telling you to not do it. That Banda was keeping you safe and well. You where healthy, having 4 foods a day, not having to worry about money, why would you want to get away from this heaven?.
"Lets drink tomorrow" you proposed to Banda. You two were currently having dinner with some random music in the background.
"For what exaclty? Banda asked. The took sometime studying your face.
"For celebrating...i have been with you for months now, and i believen they have been the best moths of my life.
Banda stayed silence eating his food, he had seen a change in your behaviour but was still unsure if you had truly changed. While his tortures were all mental and never physical (he liked to save these) he still tought you had some fight spirit on you.
And it ecxited him.
"Alright, i will try to get us some beer"
Tonight, tonight you were going to do it. Banda had bought lots of beer and some chicken meat. He seemed so happy about the situation.
Oh fool.
You two started to drink, you made sure to see him pouring your drink. As the two of you drunk you got closer to him, the knife hiding in you felt almost bad but you knew you had to do it.
Banda took one last drink and went down to kiss you, and in that moment you attacked, your hand when you the knife and ready to kill him but a hand took your arm, twisted it painfully and took it away.
You looked with horror at Banda. He had the most evil expression you had seen.
"So this was your plan, getting me drunk and stab me....not bad but too amateur"
You went to respond but you started to see blurry, was the beer ? It could be, you havent drink in a long time, but beer was by far not the strongest thing you had drink.
"Something's wrong darling?" Banda asked drinkingn a bit more "oh, it may be these pills i gave you, you know when you went to get us more food"
Shit, yes you did leave for a moment. You two were having such a good time that you let yourself be carefree and asked if he wanted more food.
You felt back, you back hitting the ground, you tried to get up but Banda pushed you down with his foot.
"I knew you were being too easy, i never made a mess of you, never did break you enough"
He got down, sitting on you, now he was moving the knife around your face and passing it by your arms. He cut you and you cried in suprise.
"Now, this will happen. Im gonna cut you, and you will cry because i know it hurts. But dont worry" He kissed your lips and then your neck.
"We will play around pain and pleassure tonight. I wanted to have you in a different way, a sweeter way, but you decided to act like this".
He did small cuts in your arms, kissing them, sucking your blood and then kissing you. He slowly took your shorts, making cuts in your tights, then he removed your shirt, and craved his name on your stomach.
You screamed and begged him to stop but Banda just laughted making you feel his hard dick.
"Oh im going to make you feel so good. You will be screaming my name all night. You wont ever think on doing something like this again. And you know what, we will repeat this in the morning, oh yes, stop saying no. We will do it anyways.
That night Banda tortured you in the worse way possible. The took your dignity away, he played with you all night and when he got tired he tied you up and as a promise he continued in the morning.
He left you there, covering in blood and cum. Said he needed to pick up somethings from a friend and left you.
It could have been hours or minutes, time became blurry, but he returned he took you to the shower, help you clean yourself and took care of your cuts. He then took you back to bed, he tied you up, kissed you and wished you a good night.
#alice in borderland#imawa no kuni no alice#aib imagine#aib#aib imagines#alice in borderland x reader#banda sunato x reader#tw: rape#tw: abuse
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crush on you (yasuo x reader)
a/n i really liked it while writing this so please show love!! and it’s big yet amazing (; so hope you enjoy it!
working in a bar on ionia is like sacrificing your life. there will be many fights among drunk people that their lives are miserable, men and women making out in front of you and you, who gives alcohol to the people. you liked that but by the time the same things happened, your life became boring and tiring until…
…your life became more interesting and upside down when a mysterious man appeared in the bar. he looked tall, long brown hair tied in a ponytail and a blue coat/scarf with his torso appearing as well. you didn’t hesitate, you bit your lip while he approached you
“can a get a drink? maybe two… drinks?” the man said
you turned around and saw his brown eyes looking at you “yeah… here you go.. so what brought you here?”
“a drink really gets me out of all my troubles i made.. after all i’ve done, i ran away and ran away by having drinking problems too” now you know who he is since you recognize him well..
“ah! are you the man who killed his brother??”
he sighed “yes.. everyone knows me and my name too”
“no i don’t know it.. shall we introduce ourselves.. if you want to..”
he sad-smiled “i’m yasuo”
you said your name trying to hand-shake him. your hands were small against his. first time in your life you had heart-eyes. you blushed and you thought that this is your first time feeling that you have a crush on a man.
“pleasure to meet you” you said
he pointed to the glass that made you realize that he wants an another drink. you get him another one while you get a drink for yourself too.
hours passed by talking and laughing. you never saw the other side of him. drunk, flirty, open-minded and funny. did you really start to fall in love with a guy who many people hated him but in real time he was innocent for all he has done.
“i have to go. to.. continue my ride and i hope to see you again. you seem a good person” he said making you sad.
“hope so..” you sad-smiled. you really wanted to hug him but you were afraid if he would get uncomfortable “see you.. soon.. i guess”
he laughed. you really liked his laugh “see you soon. until then, bye”
he left. you cleaned the bar while talking to yourself
“damn, do i really have a crush on him.. he looked attractive and cute when he was drunk. he flirted with me a lot. talked about how cute i look when i blushed. oh my goodness did he noticed that i blushed? oh no! but nonetheless, i really hope he would come again. i really wanna tell him how i feel. im in love with him..”
2 weeks passed by. you didn’t see him. you started to miss him more and more but you have to forget him because you know that he will never come back until everything about his life changed. he came back to ionia to “clean” his name after all he has done but little did you know that you guys will meet again but under in bad conditions on the bar..
two men, drunk came through the bar and started out of blue fighting. you really had to stop them but you get hit by one of the two. a scar started to appear next to your lips, bruises everywhere while they cuss you until..
you saw him again. with no second thought he started to fight them and he killed them. you felt so sensitive about seeing dead bodies and you started to cry. the swordman dropped his sword down and run to you trying to comfort you. he hugged you
“it’s okay now, it’s okay.. let me look at you, oh my goodness…” he saw you with bruises, scars and almost half naked. you didn’t know what to do. you were weak.
“they made a mess in the bar yas! how im gonna suppose to clean it up?” you said while crying
“imma help you out no need to worry about it. get yourself some rest right there” he pointed to the table. you sit on the table while you watched him cleaning the bar but you can’t help it out because you wanna clean up too. you did it so and he smiled while watching you cleaning up. you see him smiling at you and got confused
“why are you smiling?”
“nothing” he smirked.
after cleaning up the bar you took the chance and confessed him
“yasuo, look, i really wanna say this now and probably i’ll never see you again so i wanna say that now. i… i have a crush on you… i really like you since you first came up here. i like your smile, laugh, eyes, when you’re flirting. everything about you makes me fall in love more and more time by time.. and i know that i’ll never see you again. if you reject me that’s okay-”
his lips were on yours. you were shocked. it lasted a minute and you felt like it lasted for a decade. his lips were soft and passionate.
“never thought that a girl would confess me.” he says while smiling “i really like you too. you thought that i will reject you?” while he poked your nose “i liked you since when i entered the bar. your eyes, smile and if you let me say it.. your body. you’re cute and funny and you understand me well enough and i really appreciate it. never thought that a person like you would stand by my side..”
“i love you” you said to him. he never heard this word ever before even his parents never said “i love you” to him. now how he is supposed to say it back?
“yasuo, you dont have to say that you love me back, your confession is good enough for me”
“love you too babe” you widened your eyes while he called you “babe”
“did you really called me… babe?”
he laughed “yes. what? is there a problem?”
you laughed “no it’s okay! at least i like it when you call me that.. your voice hypnotizes me”
he widened while his hand was on his neck “oh! it does?”
you giggled “yes”
“well will you be my… partner? is that how they saying it?”
you giggled again “yes is this is how you saying it and yes i will be your partner” while you hugged him.
he never felt so much love. he bit his lip and hugged you more tightly.
“you will leave ionia to continue your.. journey?” you looked up to him while his large hands was in your waist
“… nah i don’t think so… unless you wanna come with me. do you want to be on my side?”
“yes. like the wind.” you said while smiling
he smiled back “so you will be like a wind, always by my side.”
“yes.” you said
“then let’s go!” he grabbed your hand and you guys left. while starting a new page in both of your life’s. living in peace without no one else hurting you. you really admire him playing the flute while you hummed in the melodies and notes. sung together, traveling together and doing everything together. he was the perfect boyfriend and if not boyfriend, husband material. and then your life has been happily ever after. with the person you love and you will always love..
a/n hope you enjoyed it! 2 hours of writing it (; love u <3
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Botany...Of Course, Pt 3
Larissa Weems x OCTeacher
Tw: alcohol comsumption
Note: As requested here is part 3!! Thank you to everyone who reads and shares their thoughts! I was thinking about maybeee taking requests if anyone has some, but the thing about me is when I like a fic idea, I cannot make it short, I want to make a whole story out of it lol
~3500 words, Enjoy :) @alder-saan @i-love-nerdy-stuff @digital-demise @im-a-carnivorous-plant
Link to Pt 2
Saturday
You awoke to the sun shining in from the curtains, almost blinding you in the process. You were alone, Larissa's conference must have already started. You opened the doors to the balcony, the fresh smell of the plants hit you and made you feel really awake. You figured you'd venture to the gym and grab a quick shower. You got ready to go out to the second garden, you were excited to see if you could find any other interesting plants. Grabbing a coffee and a cinnamon bun, you sat on a bench amongst the trees. You looked up at some balcony's across the river. There was a large balcony, it looked like it could be a restaurant. You spotted someone who was very tall, pale, and dressed so elegantly. Ah, must be the stately sequoia tree herself. You smiled, she looked so content. She was talking to a woman while having a bite to eat. You were glad she got away from Nevermore, even if just for a few days. You couldn't believe she liked women. She was just so put together, and feminine, and proper, and honestly, if you didn’t know her, from afar she kind of looked like she would be against it. You laughed, what stupid stereotypes. Okay, maybe she should know that you like women too. Would that make her more comfortable or more uncomfortable around you? You didn't know. You will tell her when you feel it is right. You thought about the events of last night. Somehow, you had almost forgotten what had happened. How could you forget something so crazy, so traumatizing, so sad. You didn't want Larissa to be sad any longer, she didn't deserve that. Every minute you thought about erasing that memory for her, you convinced yourself a little bit more. You spent the day studying more plants, and planned a relaxing evening for you and Larissa, hoping she would be up for it.
Her conference was done a bit earlier than yesterday. She came in and plopped down on her bed, the same as the day before. She was wearing her grey dress with the belt that cinched her waist perfectly. God damn, you tried not to stare, again. "Are you tired Larissa?" She took a minute to sit up, but she lit up when she looked at you. "Well I am a bit, but we're on vacation. Did you have something in mind?" Truthfully, you had lots of things in mind that you wanted to do with Larissa, but you thought one thing would be particularly relaxing. Well, a couple things would, but one was a safter option. Sitting up quickly and turning to her, you were obviously drunk. You had a few drinks again waiting for her, what else were you to do alone? She laughed at your expression, your face lit up with excitement. "Do you want to go...to the waterpark?" Her expression softened, that's not what she was expecting you to ask. "They have a pool, a floaty river, and a hot tub with a bar!" You looked so excited, how could she say no. "I would love to Peyton, but I didn’t bring a swim suit" she said, trailing off when admitting her mistake. You frowned instantly. You thought for a minute, then had a fabulous idea. "Let's go buy you one!" you beamed at her, giddy from thinking about her in a bathing suit. Calm down, you told yourself, don't act too intrigued. She pondered for a minute, but the look on her face told you she had already made up her mind. "Okay, let's go" she said quickly, getting up and grabbing your hand.
At the mall, there were so many stores to choose a bathing suit from. You both ended up in a really fancy store that looked like you could never afford anything in there. As Larissa went to the bathing suits, you scanned your eyes over a price tag. You gasped when you saw the price of a skirt, and you quickly looked around hoping nobody heard and knew how broke you were. Larissa heard, and she walked over to you, laughing. She laid a gentle hand on your back, "Don't worry darling, if you want anything I can get it for you." Jeeze, she wasn't your sugar mommy, but if she wanted to be…just joking. You followed her to the swim suits, and she picked out a two piece white one, a two piece light blue one, and a one piece nude coloured one. You thought they would all look stunning on her, but you secretly wished she would get the white one. "I'm going to try them on" she hollered over to you. "Okay, let me know which you choose." "Why don’t you help me pick one out?" she cooed at you, and your eyes widened as you ran to her, following to the dressing room.
Of course you were right, they were all stunning on her. As she tried them on and presented them to you, it took everything in you to keep your mouth from dropping open or from getting giddy. Every time she would show you one, you grinned wide and blushed, trying to hide it by looking away or fiddling with your hands or tucking your hair behind your ear. You didn't realize until now how tall Larissa really was, how long her legs were, how flawless her pale skin was, the freckles on her arms. She noticed you blushing each time she came out of the dressing room, but she just thought it was adorable that you found her pretty. When she came out in the white suit, you weren't sitting outside of the room anymore. You were over looking at clothes, trying to distract yourself from her. Why did you think swimming would be a good idea? You didn't think you would get so flustered just from seeing her in a swim suit, what is wrong with you Peyton! "Peyton, do you want to see this one?" she called from the changing rooms. Honestly you did, but at the same time you didn't. You walked back to the change rooms and this time you couldn't stop your jaw from actually dropping. She was wearing the white suit, top coming to tie around her neck showing her cleavage, and high wasted bottoms with a belt. The metal parts were gold and it came with a long white cover up. This was definitely a Larissa outfit. You caught yourself and slammed your hand over your mouth, looking to her face and quickly mumbling a sorry. She laughed loudly, a genuine Larissa laugh. Well, at least she found your doting over her amusing and not creepy. "So I take it you like this one?" You took your hand from your mouth and put on a straight face, "Larissa I- this suit was definitely made for you, and only you, holy-." She giggled and walked over to you, grabbing your hands and leaning in to whisper, "How are we going to go swimming if you can't keep your composure over seeing me in a swim suit?" You were frozen from her proximity, and so embarrassed, even though you knew she had noticed your fluster. "I didn't think of that when I suggested it" you mumbled to her, a lie. She took your face in her hands and gave you a cute smile with a scrunch of her nose, turned, and went to get changed.
Back at the hotel room, you were putting on your swim suit. Black, the opposite of hers, like a Ying yang, but different. Stepping out in to the room, Larissa handed you a glass of wine from her bed and paused to stare at you in your swim suit. She giggled, took your hand, and twirled you around, looking you over. You knew she was doing this because you were admiring her earlier, so you laughed. "Oh Peyton, this swimsuit looks divine on you darling." Divine, that's a new one you thought. Blushing, you sat next to her on her bed. She was watching some fashion show, so you watched with her. You looked at her, her hair all done up, makeup still perfect. "How are you going to swim with your hair done up and makeup on?" She looked down at you with a straight face. "I just won't get wet, only my body goes in the water." This sent you into a fit of laughter, you didn't know why, probably just the way she said it. You were lying on the bed laughing, trying not to spill your wine. She started laughing at you, "Peyton what's so funny?" she chirped. You composed yourself and sat up, "Larissa it's not as fun if you don't go all in, you have to at least take your hair out." The truth was Larissa didn't let people see her with no makeup often. Her hair wasn't that big of a deal, but she only felt sophisticated and pretty when she was done up. She looked at you, a slight frown on her face. "What's wrong? Do you not want people seeing you not done up?" She smiled a bit at this, as if you read her mind. She pondered for a minute. You were so gentle and kind to her. Really, you both didn’t know each other well, but she felt like you would never judge her. "Will you take the pins out of my hair?" she said in such a low tone you almost didn't know what she said. You smiled and turned to look her in the eyes, "Of course, if that's what you actually want, you don't have to Larissa." She looked back at you, and gave a quiet "Please." You moved your hands up to her hair and found the pins, removing them slowly. It must feel so much better to have her hair down after it being up so long. You watched as her hair fell, wavy and reaching past her shoulders. It was longer than you thought it would be, and softer, like silk. You put a hand under her hair and ran your fingers through the back of her head, giving her light scratches. She smiled and leaned into it, sipping her wine. You took her in, so casually just sitting here watching tv, but she looked ethereal, she always did. You were so caught up in her beauty that you only half realized when you slipped a "Larissa, you're absolutely beautiful." You took your hand away from her hair and went wide eyed. She definitely thought you were too much now. You didn't want her to think you were trying to pick her up, you were just in awe over her. She looked you in the eyes and tilted her head to the side. As you went to mumble a 'sorry, I didn't mean to say that aloud', she spoke questioningly, "Really?" Of course she was, everyone who laid their eyes on her must have thought that. Maybe they thought it, but never had the guts to say it. You barley had the guts to tell her, you did by accident.
You felt sad by the way she questioned you, but took this as an opportunity to make her believe it as true. "Yes, of course I do, one hundred percent yes. You must know that you are, people must tell you all the time" you said with a hopeful smile. "No, not really" she looked down at the wine in her lap. "Well, maybe nobody ever tells you because you can be intimidating" you let out a giggle and put your finger under her chin, turning her face to you "but I know everyone thinks it, and I'm telling you that you are stunning, with your hair done and without, with makeup on and without." She was smiling now, you hoped it was sincere, you hoped she at least half believed you. She drank the rest of her wine and put the glass down. She turned toward you and wrapped her arms around you, pulling you in to rest her head in your neck. You felt so comfortable, so content, so at peace, and you couldn't wipe the smile off of your face if someone tried. She let you go after a minute and you were immediately cold. She looked at you with glistening eyes and cupped your face with her hand. "Thank you Peyton, for making me feel comfortable with you." This made your heart swell, all you wanted was for her to have a friend that she could be herself around. "Of course pretty girl. Do you want to go to the waterpark now?" you gave her a genuine smile. She shook her head excitedly and you were on your way.
You were floating down the lazy river behind her. She looked so relaxed, and you were having so much fun. You had never been on a lazy river before. As you floated, you looked at the scenery. There were plants polluting the water park like the rest of the hotel, but there were also a lot of kids. You swam closer to her, trying to float faster to reach her. You caught up to her and looked at her, laughing as you said "beep, beep" and rushed past her. As you floated in front of her now, you turned around to admire her, your head resting on your hands. She laughed at you, admiring you back. You gave her a smirk and batted your eyelashes, and she winked at you. You blushed and turned away from her, trying to float faster away, what a flirt.
As Larissa settled in the pool, you went to the bar to order your drinks. You got in with her and started swimming around. There were only two other girls in the pool, so you almost had it to yourselves. Out of nowhere, Larissa splashed you. You couldn't believe she had been so bold. You looked at her, drenched, and walked up to her slowly as she backed away. "NO, not my hair" she stated while backing away from you. "Ah, ah, that's not fair, you started it." You were right, she did start it. You felt bad ruining her makeup or getting her hair wet, but she let you take it down, so she was comfortable, right? You splashed her, but not as much as she had splashed you. She let out a squeal, and you instantly swam away. You knew she would get her revenge. "Drinks are ready" the bartender hollered, setting them on the counter. You got out to get them and brought them back to the pool. "Don't splash me now, you'll ruin the drinks" you warned, and she listened. As soon as you put your drink down at the side of the pool, Larissa caught you off guard and splashed you again. You let out a squeal this time and lunged yourself at her. You wrapped your arms around her waist and knocked her over, ducking her whole head under the water by accident. You helped her resurface and then froze, you were so scared. That's not what you meant to do, but she would never believe you. "OH shit, I'm so sorry Larissa, I actually didn't mean to do that" you pleaded, hoping she wouldn’t drown you. She grabbed your face and you were scared for your life, but she started laughing, like she was having a blast. Her mascara was running a bit now, but her lipstick was still perfect. She was so gorgeous like this, having fun and not caring about her appearance. You wiped the mascara from under her eyes, and scrunched your nose up to give her a cute face.
As you did this, you got closer to her. While she was laughing, you caught a distant but snarky "What are they, girlfriends?" from one of the other girls in the pool. You ignored it, so focused on Larissa. "Ew, I hope not, she is way too old for her anyway." Yep, you heard what you thought you did, and this time, Larissa heard it too. She glared at them, still holding your face in her hands. You couldn't turn to look at them because of this, so you just stared at her. "Excuse me, are you talking about us?" she sneered at them, you got nervous. One of them started with her. "Yea, we were talking about you, what are you anyway, gay?" You became increasingly more angry and moved away from Larissa's grip. What the hell is wrong with them, it's 2023. Larissa slowly moved closer to them, "I'll have you know that I am gay in fact, and I'd appreciate it if you would leave me alone." You were about to back her up when you remembered that you weren't out to Larissa yet. You opened your mouth but closed it quickly. "What's wrong with your little girlfriend there, she can't speak for herself?" Not wanting to drag you into this, Larissa started "They shouldn't have to speak to immature bigots like you, and anyway, they're not my-." "Baby, it's okay, let's just enjoy ourselves" you walked over to her, grabbing her arm and trying to force her away from them. "Yea, listen to what your little girl says" one of them stated and both of them snickered. You would let them make fun of you, but you'd kill them for taking digs at Larissa and her age. "You know, I bet you both that I can steal your drinks from behind you there without coming withing 10 feet of you. If I can't, we will leave. If I can, you have to watch me kiss my girlfriend." You said this with the most bold tone you think you have ever used. You stared them down, then looked up at Larissa when she grabbed your hand. She was wide eyed and tilted her head in question, she didn't know why you were trying to defend her by pretending to be her girlfriend. "You don't have to do this" she whispered in your ear. "Do you mind kissing me?" you whispered back. She shook her head no as a blush crept up on her cheeks. "Bet" one of the girls said. You smiled and took Larissa to the far end of the pool, away from the girls. You put your right hand out and concentrated hard. You didn't use your telekinesis a lot, maybe you should practice it more. One of the girls drinks started levitating and then slowly moving toward you. It landed in your hand and you downed the whole thing. You put the glass on the side of the pool and turned to the girls. They were both in shock. One was trying to form some words, and the other couldn't do more than blink. You winked at them and turned to Larissa, cupping her face with one hand. "Come here Riss" you whispered as you went up on your toes to reach her level. You kissed her softly, just like you always wanted to. She grabbed your head and pulled you closer. You didn't kiss for too long, but you almost forgot that the girls were there. You pulled away, turning back to them. "Not only are we gay, were also outcasts. Get a load of that, bitches." And with that, you took Larissa's hand and lead her out of the pool.
As soon as you got back to the room, Larissa started laughing all giddy. Seeing her like this made you do the same. You laid down on your bed together, laughing. After a few minutes, she turned to you. "Peyton, you didn't have to do that for me, but thank you" she sounded really appreciative and sincere. "Well honestly Larissa, it pissed me off when they started about your age. But, I have something to tell you." You paused, wondering if she caught on. "You like women, don't you" she said, her smile so wide her white teeth were showing. "Yes" you laughed, "When did you figure it out?" "Well, when you wanted to kiss me. But I had a hunch when you couldn't contain yourself as I was trying on swim suits today." You rolled away from her groaning, burying your head in your hands, a blush forming on your face again. "Sorry about that" you muttered. She sat up and pulled your hands away from your face. "Peyton it's okay, we both like women, we have something in common" she said sweetly.
Coming out of the bathroom with your pajamas on, you found Larissa asleep on her bed, still in her swim suit. She looked adorable lying there. You didn't want to disturb her rest, but she still had makeup on and she couldn't sleep in that. "Rissa, wake up pretty, you have to get changed" you whispered in her ear. You saw her smile before her eyes opened, maybe she wasn't really asleep. She got up and went to the bathroom, saying nothing to you. You laid in your bed ready to fall asleep, it was a long day. A few minutes later she came out sans makeup, and sat on the edge of her bed. You looked at her, she was just sitting there looking at the ground. You thought this might be a repeat of last night, but then she looked up at you. She had a needy expression on her face, like she wanted something from you. You pushed the covers off of yourself and opened your arms, inviting her in. Despite her height, she laid down and put her head on your chest. You hugged her tight and stroked her silky hair, moving some out of her face. You kissed her forehead and mumbled "Sweet dreams Rissa."
Pt 4
#larissa weems fanfic#principal larissa weems#larissa x reader#larissa weems#larissa weems fluff#wednesday netflix#eventual smut
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how i think modern!aemond looks like
note: english is not my first language, im from brasil i speak pt br português brasileiro and im using the translator sometimes, sorry for my mistakes
lets goooo 😋
first off all, his family would remain a monarchy, maybe like danish royalty (i read somewhere that the Danish royals have more political power than the British royals or something like that, and i honestly cant think the Targaryens giving up any power that they could have) and here we DONT have incest (at least not the ones that would be shocking in our current society)!!!! read my thoughts below:
viserys didnt die yet and still being the king
daemon is viserys cousin so she can marry daemon with "no problem" and shes the heir of the iron throne
the line of succession to the throne would be: rhaenyra, jacaerys, lucerys, joffrey, aegon and viserys (idk whos the eldest), aegon, helaena, aemond and finally daeron
he knows he wont be king unless some catastrophe happens and kills his whole family but still a little bit jealous
aemond takes advantage of being the 9th in the line of succession, since he has very "few" spotlight on him, so he can live a normal life like all of us mere mortals
uses his prince title when needs something (that includes the girls 🤭)
think im done about the political part of his family so lets move on to physical appearance and hc about him and his relationship with family
aemond doesnt have long hair like in hotd, his hair is more like tom or billy (personally billy is my favourite)
ewan smile is so pretty i cant 😭
def wear an eye patch bc dont have one eye, obviously he dont lost his eye on a fight about claiming a dragon, but maybe he fell on a shard of glass or lucerys pushed him into a sharp rock which caused the scar and pierce his eye (my poor boy 😓)
ATHLETIC BOY!!!!! im talking about both body and style, ewan practically only wears adidas and aemond being a mama's boy, coming from two rich families buys everything that is adidas clothing
and you guys see ewan in world on fire and his new photoshoot like bro his muscles are heavenly 🙏🏻🙏🏻🙏🏻 (só uma chance ewan, pfv 😭
aemond smokes A LOT, i mean aegon get drunk every week (if he doesnt do it every day 🤷🏻) and helaena has her bugs collection, so why he cant do something he likes and help him to destress?
for a 100% sure hes alicents favorite boy and daerons favorite brother
daeron probably just thinks his brother is the best in the world, the bravest, the most beautiful and everything a child can think of their big brother (he also thinks the scar on aemonds eye is really cool and when he was a child, like 4 years, he took one of his eye patches and put it to look like aemond
and about alicent, just look at their hair in hotd, those are the most hydrated hair of the entire series!!! ok joke, aemond was a quiet child, never gave her much trouble and was the first child she could call "her own child"
aegon would be to the realm if something happened to rhaenyra before she sire heirs and we all know how his temper is ☠️
helaena in my hc is autistic, some autistic people dont like other people touching them and helaena would be one these
as a child, she would reject alicents hugs and affections, in addition to being very difficult to communicate with her
contrary to all that, aemond was a perfect child, he would be glued to alicent 24/7, wanting her hugs, kisses and affection, his mothers affection.
she was his confidant when he was suffering and crying, she helped him with the school activities that he had difficulty, she was the one who stayed by his side in the hospital when he lost his eye
and aemond returned all the love his mother gave to him taking care of her and being the best at everything he did, just to make her proud of him
its aemond whos sitting next to alicent when she cries worried about being attracted to women and wipe her tears, she feels guilty for doing something that is said to be "wrong" in her religion (alicent para meninas, rhaenyra is her girlfriend canon
now leaving the sad mood aside lets go to more aemond's hc + dating hc
vhagar is aemonds lizard and she has a HUGE terrarium in his room with everything and more a lizard needs.
he is studying politics, international relations, history or philosophy in college
probably his girlfriend (me and you obvious) would be on one of these classes too or something like that
the BEST boyfriend ever, he is super respectful and treats his girlfriend like the princess she will be in the future when they get married
romantic dates would be to fancy places that nobles frequent, like operas and ballet but aemond would also take you to a museum, library, dinner at a super expensive restaurant you like and of course, skiing in the swiss alps
if you like a sport or did one, he would be super supportive and take you to every competition you wanted to see/gonna compete in
aemond would spoil you no matter if you have money or not
have you seen a prada bag online? it will be in your hands the next morning
did you make a comment of a swarovski necklace you saw at the mall? he bought the necklace and one more set of jewelry
are you undecided whether to buy a Chanel or Dior perfume? no problem, the two perfumes will be on your table when you get home
aemond would be very insecure about his scar and eye, and really wouldnt think himself worthy of you
but you are here with him to tell him how important he is to you, how handsome he is and how much you love him, when he heard you say that, all his insecurities would go away
and he absolutely LOVES that you touch his hair, massage, wash his hair and make mini braids on it
anything you do he loves 💗
#aemond targaryen#aemond x fem!reader#aemond x reader#aemond x y/n#aemond x you#house of the dragon#rhaenyra targaryen#hotd#alicent hightower#viserys ii targaryen#aegon ii targaryen#helaena targaryen#daeron targaryen#jace velaryon#lucerys velaryon#joffrey velaryon#rhaenicent#rhaenyra x alicent#modern#a casa do dragão#aemond fic#x reader#aemond fluff#alicent my beloved#team green#team black#dance of the dragons
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WAIT, WHAT?
summary: characters as things people have done or said to me that really made my heart flutter
c/w: some of them are suggestive, some are just fluff so if anyone is uncomfortable with the suggestive part please do not read <3, mentions of alcohol also, gender neutral (just "you" and "he/him" pronouns for the boys) (kaeya is in every part wtf)
characters: some fandoms (i really thought about it but I cannot get them out of my head so yeah) nijisanji EN (luxiem), genshin men and mha boys(?
a/n: I was bored and I remembered this one post of someone making this and I thought about making it since I have a lot of stories about crushes and tension between me and other people, so enjoy! (Keep in mind,all of those did not happen only with men. I have been the love victim of women, men and non-binary people) ♡ THIS IS JUST MY OPINION PLEASE DON'T GET MAD
☼ Meeting someone close to your friend. You try to introduce yourself with a handshake but he takes your hand in his and kisses the back of it while staring directly into your eyes.
Vox Akuma, Ayato, Kaeya, Albedo, Kazuha, Diluc, Dainsleif Zhongli, Denki, Hawks, Sero, Shoto T.
☼He sits next to you in a premise, barely hearing anything because of the music. You know he's drunk but you ask him if he's okay. He responds with: “Do you want the truth or a lie? The truth is that I want to kiss you right now, the lie is that I'm sober.”
Luca Kaneshiro, Shxtou, Kaeya, Venti, Itto, Denki, Izuku, Eijiro, Sero, Hawks, Tetsutetsu
☼You're drunk, same goes for the one who is on top of you, his chest against your back. You start laughing and the moment you turn to look at him, you stare at each other, wanting to kiss in the middle of the friend group.
Vox Akuma, Shxtou, Mysta Rias, Kazuha, Venti, Tartaglia, Aether, Itto, Izuku, Eijiro, Sero, Hawks
☼ You're just rambling about something with your friends. You notice his gaze stuck on you but before you can speak, he just says out loud: “Your nose is so pretty, I love it.”
Ike Eveland, Luca Kaneshiro, Shu Yamino, Mysta Rias, Aether, Albedo, Kazuha, Kaeya, Izuku, Shoto T, Mirio, Eijiro, Ojiro, Tokoyami (is actually Dark Shadow who voices his thoughts)
☼Playing spin the bottle, it ends with you and him. You're not uncomfortable kissing anyone but when you crawl a bit, settling so you can kiss him correctly, instead of getting closer, his hand wraps around your nape, pulling you to him so he can have that sweet kiss.
Vox Akuma (this man, ugh..), Mysta Rias, Kaeya, Diluc, Tartaglia, Xiao, Katsuki, Dabi, Shigaraki, Hawks, Denki, Monoma
☼Just strolling down the street, concentrated in not stepping on the lines, you feel an arm around your shoulder, his body really close to yours, and out of nowhere he goes: “Look how cute you are.”
Ike Eveland, Vox Akuma, Luca Kaneshiro, Shu Yamino, Kaeya, Thoma, Ayato, Kazuha, Mirio, Dabi, Denki (supportive bf really), Eijiro
☼You just have met him a couple hours ago. A nice friend of your friend. Hours pass and you get closer to him, dancing with him in the attic while everyone else is enjoying the party. In the end, you're so interested in each other that he lends you his clothes so you sleep comfortably as his arms wrap around your waist and his body spoons you.
Vox Akuma (maybe), Diluc, Itto, Tartaglia, Thoma, Dabi, (I can't think of any more mha characters)
☼After a long night, you wake up really sleepy along with your friends. You see him and slowly you crawl towards him, just asking for permission before he lets you lay on his chest, his hand caressing your head as you drift again in a peaceful slumber.
Vox Akuma (im so sorry, I just adore him), Luca Kaneshiro, Shu Yamino, Diluc, Kaeya, Zhongli, Kazuha, Itto, Xiao, Thoma, Izuku, Eijiro, Hawks, Sero, Katsuki, Mirio
☼The music is loud, the cheers of your friends while dancing on the dancefloor hype you up, the songs playing have that beat that makes your hips move and roll, and when you least expect it, you feel his two hands grabbing your hips, his trousers just hitting your ass as you move your body to the beat, letting him hold you.
Vox Akuma (you cannot tell me otherwise), Mysta Rias, Tartaglia, Kaeya, Hawks, Dabi, Katsuki, Sero, Shindo
#gn reader#mha headcanons#mha x reader#mha x gn!reader#nijisanji#nijisanji en#nijisanji x reader#genshin imagines#genshin smut#genshin x gn reader
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as a starved animal whose diet requires yuri i want to know how you think cass and veronica would Address Their Feelings For Each Other, or if they ever possibly would or ever possibly could
I am so glad you asked cuz i did indeed think about this way too much and i hope i can word this in a coherent way.
Veronica's the one that initially falls in love because cass is so cool and confident and hot ect. ect. you get it but is a lot more lowkey about it and in her mind its more of a "sure would be nice" thought instead of some hard crush because she does not think a relationship is achievable because shes under the impression that cass is a straight woman (until cass has her "yeah im an ally. I fuck women. We exist moment). Meanwhile after veronica comes out to cass (got tired of pretending to understand cassidys rating of ncr soliders on the strip from most to least fuckable and had to say something) something in her brain flips and cassidy becomes fucking obsessed with veronica for literally no reason (woman you like as a friend and subconciously think is hot is gay so you suddenly technically have a chance and the feeling is like crack cocaine). Cassidy goes through her shinji chair.png moment where she cycles from complete denial about her feelings to acknowledging them and psyching herself up to say something and overanalyzing every interaction for awhile. I think she would be the one to confess her feelings first because it gets unbearable for her but would fuck it up in every way imaginable (is too nervous about it so she brilliantly decides to get drunk so shes not as nervous. Gets too drunk. Words dont come out right. She comes on a bit too strong. Passes out.). Luckily veronica is weirdly into it and also has a thing for total disasters apparently so it does somehow work out. They'd take it pretty slow (probably on veronicas suggestion because this is cass' first attempt at a relationship with another woman (and also veronicas a bit of a romantic but shh)) and im actually not sure if it would work out long term or not? They both have their own issues (cass has a hard time with commitment methinks and veronicas a bit too hung up on her ex which makes dating new people hard sometimes) which i think would be very interesting to watch them try and work out...idk i do kind of like endgame cass and veronica like they both go through so much bullshit cause of the courier and would share like a mutual understanding for each other so why not. Plus i think the possible dynamics between them are so fun and i specifically adore cass being an absolute fucking disaster and veronica being like "but shes my disaster <3"
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things my best friend has said as marauders quotes
Sirius at James and Lily: don't breed. breed is bad.
Sirius: he (remus) would be a good stripper I think
James to Sirius: you're a hoe. but a lovely hoe
Barty: listen. I've cut open humans before and they have big breathing sacks-
Sirius about Regulus: he's a middle aged child
James explaining Sirius and Remus's relationship: they're besties...with benefits 😏
Peter: is there an ankle kink?
Regulus: because ALL ghosts just HAVE to be white don't they?
Evan, mispronouncing androgynous: yeah I feel a bit an-dro-gy-noose today
James: [sirius], please stop assaulting my pen
Evan: I'm a little German boy, I'm gonna get your toes with my little German boy fingers
Barty: give me the dead fetus, I have plans
Peter to Remus: do you have... a knee kink?
Marlene: I think the eggs for breakfast caused my period actually
Marlene: monkeys are the ancestors of cats
Barty, to Regulus: are you a keyboard? cos I'll play you like one
Sirius: I swear to [Merlin] I will sniff your arse
Sirius to Remus: can I unwrap you like a Christmas present?
Marlene: step-mummy please😩
Remus: no one likes a dog that vibrates [padfoot]
Mary: if a bee hit it from the back would it die before it could orgasm?
Peter: I think I could top a spoon
James to Lily: im not wearing anything under this mirror👀
Barty about Regulus: evil dick, giant brain
Sirius: haha [marlene] ate dick
Marlene: BOOBIES? WHERE
Lily, after a marauders prank: I could write a sixteen page essay on how much I wish I were a lesbian
Sirius when Remus walks in: hello sexy male
Sirius: a secret, third thing, my deep ass cheeks
Remus: Lma-no.
Remus: stop saying thick-arse rim!
Marlene, drunk: horse shoes don't go on horse cock, that's why they're horse shoes not horse condoms
Barty, about Regulus: I'd let him punch me for free, but you got PAID?
Sirius: [Regulus!] you devious little dog!
James: I can confirm, [Marlene] and my mum did not have sex to make me
Sirius: someone cummed in a glue bottle, that's why it's so hard
James, panicking to Pomfrey: MY JUGULAR IS JIGGLUNG
Remus: mate stop fingering the biscuit
James: I don't want your drug pens!
James at Marlene: stop underlining your nipple
Sirius: haha there's a man on your tit
James: my mum is not a man! nor a football!
Sirius: [Dumbledore] is a BOTTOM everyone
Barty: I'd be the one DOING the fucking, not getting fucked
Regulus: can I refer to you as a travelling circus?
Barty, in response to ^: well I am a walking joke
Sirius: if you're homophobic you get sent to bitch jail
James: I'm just too quirky for my own good
Sirius: does that mean pussy is dogwater
Sirius when Remus gets rid of his trousers: how much are you selling your arse fabric for?
Remus: I dare you to drink the bananas cum
Lily: I don't want to hold hands with Jesus, put him back on his cross
Sirius, after losing his virginity: I started celebrating because I got to touch arse
Remus: christ no I don't want to touch God's nuts
James when Remus gives him anything: thanks. it doesn't have weed on it, right?
Sirius: I'm like a bird hi-YAH oh shit I pulled a muscle
Remus: the wake up woman touched my penis
James: please stop serenading my father
Marlene: whore core?? I think you mean me when women
Sirius and Regulus about slow walkers: you know what career they can pursue? ROADBLOCKS
James: be careful. I'll beat you up with my Calvin Klein man muscles
James: im clutching my house keys
Effie, about Sirius: I saw him and I knew immediately I should put him in my child jar
Sirius after drinking water: im gonna break records with how much I piss today
Evan, seeing Sirius from afar: is that Jesus christ? why is he so white? absolutely translucent
Barty, holding Regulus's diary: I think this may be a gay sex book
baby James: what do you do? I'm a snot picker
Sirius: thaddeus with the phatteus
Sirius about Regulus: stop babygirl-ifying him! he is not babygirl material! I am :(
Barty: he was a man. probably a white one, there was a lot of audacity
Sirius: that is two cheeks too many mate
Sirius: give me the fathers I need to collect them
Remus: stop squeezing my fucking flange
Regulus: calm your foot before I eat it
Marlene: it dried my nose. it was so dry. drier than a straight man's wife, I'll tell you that
James: oh, you did competitive ballet when you were young? my parents loved me so I can't relate
James, trying to help Remus and Sirius get together: do you like balls bursting in your mouth?
Barty: stop playing with balls in your mouth
James, watching Regulus, Evan and Barty walk into the toilets: three men just walked into the loo, they might kiss~
Remus, trying to find a body wash: does this smell like weiner or hydrangea
Sirius when McGonagall: turn your bagpipes off for [Merlin's] sake
Evan: thumb me bitch
Sirius to Marlene: you already knew you liked women! you were in her boohs!
#marauders era#regulus black#barty crouch jr#bartylus#regulus x barty#sirius black#barty crouch junior#dead gay wizards#marlene mckinnon#remus and sirius#remus lupin#james potter#lily evans#mary macdonald#james and lily#jily#wolfstar
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You ever get drunk and high and read about the trump news while one of your closest friends (one of the two close friends you have) is asleep smiling next to you and you feel like somewhere out there there’s another universe where your father never died and your mother never grew into her own person and you never did x y z thing in x y z order and like idk it’s just very like,,, offputting and healing at the same time to read the news on my own time after seeing one too many posts referencing trump instead of hearing it on Fox News or from my father yelling at the tv about it and like yeah god idk it’s weird grief is weird big feelings watched the last episode of the midnight gospel today (yesterday) and now my brain is like wee ooo wee ooo your dad is dead wee ooo wee ooo it’s June it’s Father’s Day month wee ooo wee ooo your grandfather died yesterday (my fathers dad) weee ooo wee ooo brain on fire weee ooo wee ooo random memories of my first ever therapist have started randomly popping up in my memories and I do not know why they’re there. But they seem relevant. Hmm. also have talked about slash thought about my past relationships much more recently than I ever do and it is technically on par with my cherry tag season vibe to be in my feels about homoerotic friendships from highschool while drunk on brown liquor and root beer (a la root beer float the blackbear song I listened to a LOT in like 2017 maybe. 2018?) but it’s still a bit umm. All encompassing. just overwhelming. On my mind in a very low buzzing type of way. girls when they feel evil for their past actions because they loved too hard every time and then doomed it by wanting what was best for themselves or the other persons mental health at the time and being selfish but like I have to step back and be like oh woah a fourteen or fifteen year old was selfish woooahhh that’s crazyyy!!!! Never heard of That before. A 14/15 year old putting themselves and their own mental health first and then feeling like the worst person on the planet and for sure developing some trauma from the whole situation 🙀🙀🙀 wwahhhhhhh okay maybe that one is a bit more me but im sure im not alone there. Brains are weird. Also kind of Just Now clicking in my brain that I did in fact get weirdly afraid of liking women after I broke up with my first girlfriend and it ended poorly so I fully was like hmm I definitely can’t be a lesbian because I am not Allowed (by myself I guess) to like women bc now I am afraid of fhem (not sexy style) but then recently (ish) I fucked a dude and got traumatized by that (legitimately) (and also just like. Didn’t have fun.) and now I’m like looking back on my life more and going hmmm. Maybe I’m a lesbian and maybe I’ve been afraid to say that for literally years and years and years because of my own past perceptions from hearing my family / the internet talk growing up and maybe I have this realization over and over again and then go wahhh idk tho cause I’m baby I have done nothing been nowhere met no one so I just say whatever I’m queer and it doesn’t fucking matter if I love someone I love them regardless like at the end of the day those are the fuckin facts. Bam mic drop. Idk. It’s only one thirty nine in the morning eek I took an accidental like four hour nap yesterday and then we were drinking and smoking so like I have evergyyyy and I had some sugary stuff so I’m like awake as fuck rn but it’s fine it’s good I’m gonna smoke an indica bowl and pet the dog and fall asleep super comfy like the second I put my head on the pillow I bet
#love writing long blocks of text and sending them out into the world for future Milo to find and read and go what was I even talking about#what was I even talking about
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hai :3 ambrose directed me to you so. please tell me about lip/hiyo i love drama and discourse so much (non forcing btw)
みなさん、おはこんばんちわ !! my name is ess but u can call me vyn, maiko or secchan~ and i will be your announcer for today <3 ! today we will be discussing why i dislike lip/hiyo ! this is gonna contain a lot of buffers so i dont get caught up in the tags or the search results so um. im sorry if its a pain to read. please be warned these are MOSTLY personal opinions and i don't intend on infringing on ppl who do ship it. i do not care. simply DONT tag my shit as it and we're good ^_^ except ppl dont listen and i find it fucking annoying so. here's a full blown explanation i guess
first ! lip.hiyo is a ship between hi.yori su.zumi and the members of lipx.lip ai.zo and yu.jiro . hiyo/ri is their manager and she's a girl from the countryside who moved to tokyo to study and work on becoming a track and field athelete . lipx/lip are themselves. their relationship in canon is. friends at best. something else at worst. being the little shits they are, lip/lip are nothing short of assholes to hiyo.ri for the majority of their earlier canon interactions. she states multiple times in her stories that they make her feel stupid. while i do think they respect and care for each other as coworkers, i still dislike how they treat her as a person, especially how they put down her feelings. before and after her.oiku where hiyo.ri undergoes a transformation courtesy of lx.l dressing her up so she can confess to another member of the idol series, asu.ka kai.do (discontinued due to the collaborative project ending) — they continue to tell her that had it not been for the pretty dress or the makeup, she wouldn't be worthy of being called a heroine. she wouldn't be a "girl" in their eyes. which is where a lot of the ships stem from.
but wait! you're probably asking yourself, or well, me: "secchan-sensei! lipx.lip bully each other a whole damn lot too! they bicker and they insult each other! wouldn't this put shipping them in the same category as lp/hy?" excellent question! while i understand why people can perceive it similarly, there is one big difference. the idols and hiyori exist in an unbalanced power dynamic. no i do not mean that in a literal sense, but in a social, emotional sense. you said it yourself, lip/lip bully each other! theyre mean and rude and crass and jerks to EACH OTHER. there is a back and forth movement. they bite and bite back, so to speak. while with hiy.ori as you're aware, she swallows her pain and bottles up that sadness and holds back those tears, she never responds or insults them back because she's not that kind of person. above all things, hiyori remains kind to ai and yu but the fact that they hurt her in ways they don't even acknowledge are not mutually exclusive.
if you're familiar with hone.yworks lore, as well as lx.l themselves, you probably know at least an adequate bit of their trauma. to put it simply, a.izo struggles with interacting with women, to the point where he finds them difficult to be with. this is often translated to him hating women, so as an idol with a predominantly female fanbase, this is a big problem. this trauma stems from his mother, who for the greater part of his childhood, was an abusive drunk. not only that, his older brother, whom he looked to for support and comfort when their home life was at their worst, is a playboy who toyed around with women and relationships with hopes of avoiding the loneliness at home. while ken grew out of his issues and ultimately became a better person, his actions growing up had a significant negative effect on ai.zo . he isnt jUst a miSoGyniSt dear fuck
yujiro, on the other hand, is the stepson of national treasure, tamagoro someya, a master of kabuki. his mother, tae, married into the family and he has a younger stepbrother, koichiro. tamagoro very explicitly tells him that he will not inherit the kabuki legacy, stating that he "lacks beauty" and is half-hearted. this is despite the fact that yujiro pushed himself beyond his own strength, to the point of starvation and isolation, all for the sake of pleasing his father — who never intended to acknowledge him in the first place. yujiro remained inadequate, lacking, some part of him, despite his best efforts, would never fit into the beauty of the roles his father had crafted for the stage.
“Father is father, and there’s nothing I can do about that. I think he didn’t have a choice in telling me to give up…”
“…Were you never allowed to stand on the kabuki stage?”
“There’s no way he would have let me. It was only my brother who could have…”
(That’s really messed up…)
If he had no intention of letting him perform on stage, why did he let him practice? It was cruel to put so many expectations on a child, only to rip his hope away from him. (LOVE&KISS novel, Chapter 7) [1]
how is this relevant to hiyori?
then, we talk about the infamous hero.taru anime. now, honeyw.orks anime have this curse where they're either bound to flop incredibly or butcher the characters enough it appeals to a general audience and completely destroys their characters. the hero.taru anime was made to promote lip.x.lip and profit off their popularity in the idol genre showcase hiyo.ri's heroine story. the story spans multiple mvs, from h.eroine iku.sei keikak.u -> her.oine wa hei.kin ika -> her.oine tarum.ono . there's a general difference with as.uka being cut out and replaced with nagisa after he's finally released from the honeyw.orks basement. aaand i'm getting sidetracked. as someone who watched every single anime hnw has put out, i can confidently say...
her.otaru fucking sucks.
despite being an anime centered on hiy.ori's development as a heroine, it overuses fanservice and became a cookie cutter shoujo mixed with a little idol for the views. fuck, the main conflict was literally between lip.xlip's manager and their biggest fan who had a crush on aiz.o . DO YOU SEE MY ISSUE. ok that aside. the anime completely butchers hiyo's character by making her overly dependent on lx.l. not to mention the bathroom scene. ick. the anime also completely butchers lxl by erasing their issues and making them into "just backup male leads if nag.isa doesnt sell well" and he didnt bc he was there for one fucking episode . back to my point, the anime has a particular scene pertaining to their trauma, which i have elaborately expanded above, and dumbs it down to: [2]
bad, right? not the worst butchering of it yet. you see, SOMEHOW, the herota.ru anime made the already fucked hani.wa timeline WORSE by turning yum.e fanf.are into a song about hiyori. i'm going to start tearing and biting bc this frustrated me SO MUCH . yume.fan is a song of aizo and yujiro about their struggles as stated above, and yet it was percieved as a song made to make hiyo.ri fall in love with them.
god ok this is. incredibly long at this point but i have only pierced the surface. lets just get it down to brass tacks. i hate lip.hiyo.
a lot of people came out of hero.taru shipping lip.hiyo after seeing their relationship and interactions in the anime. people tend to ship them with hiyor.i because "sHe's nOt LiKe oThER giRls" . of all the things i hate abt lip.hiyo and the hero.taru anime in general, i hate how it ruins hiyo.ri's character. i hate how they refuse to acknowledge that she enjoys feeling beautiful, she likes being a feminine, she wants to be a heroine — her issues don't lie in her not being beautiful enough to fit in the heroine mold, but the fact that she can be heroine, regardless of how she perceives herself!
well, introspective reasons aside, i hate the ship on a personal basis bc i've recently found out most ppl who ship it are pushing to make people believe it's canon ? like who the fuck does that. ONE, hiyori does have a canon love interest, nag.isa shiran.ami. TWO, they have never even remotely shown any romantic interest to her ??? well fuck i mean if you count calling her derogatory names, telling her she'll never be a girl if she doesn't dress up, or saying she'll never get a romeo if she rejects nagisa counts as flirting then sure i believe you. THREE, you can literally ship it even if it isn't canon. there is nothing stopping you??? it's giving hypocrisy bc a long loooong time ago they were mad at ai.yuu shippers for continuously mentioning their parallels and the possibility of them becoming canon and they called them [BEEEEEP] . you get the point.
negativity aside, at this point i've probably put you through a horror. sorry about that. all in all, i prefer ai.yuu and nagi.hiyo over lp/hy. i dislike het.lip in general because why would you want to inflict this upon any girl. come on. they can do better. im kidding but you get it. ai and yu trust each other more than anyone, they are canonically each other's most important person, and they are equals in persevering to achieve their dreams. THAT is what yume.fan meant [3] . and i like n.ghy bc nagi.sa has had feelings for hiyori for years, even before she dolled herself up, even before she was a manager, he fell in love with hiyori, and no one else — because in his eyes, she's always been a heroine!! "zutto heroine da" - nagi.sa in heroine wa heikin ika [4]
in case for SOME reason this isn't enough, please feel free to peruse the following posts that expand on some particular parts of this: differences between the mvs and anime | the Trauma scene | yume fan.fare's meaning | personal thoughts 1 | personal thoughts 2
CITATIONS:
[1] LOVE&KISS Chapter 7 — translation
[2] He.roine Taru.mono! Kiraware H.eroine to Naisho Os.higoto Anime Episode 4
[3] Yu.me Fan.fare by LIP.×LIP
[4] Her.oine wa Hei.kin Ika by Su.zumi Hiyo.ri (CV: Ino.ri Mi.nase)
#8.28 | ask#yeah. this is an ask and totally not the most comprehensive i have been since my last research project#this is gonna find its way to someone who hates me and it will be so fucking funny actually#SHOUT OUT TO LISI WHO KEPT ME ALIVE WHILE WRITING THIS O7#shout out to ambi too for bringing me such a pleasant ask
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Phantom of the opera middle east tour stage report
Not my usual I know but I traveled to see the tour and it was incredible. Here I discuss some moments, acting choices, and changes from the typical phantom replica:
TW: Spoilers obviously, mentions of suicide
‿︵‿︵୨˚̣̣̣͙୧ - - ୨˚̣̣̣͙୧‿︵‿︵୨˚̣̣̣͙୧ - - ୨˚̣̣̣͙୧‿︵‿︵
Note: I'm most familiar with the movie version of The Phantom so maybe things that I think are exclusive to this stage version aren't
Also Im a raoulstine stan but I really did enjoy erikstine here as most of the toxic elements are gone (most not all)
They added lines between moments in the show that I don’t believe were in the script
When Raoul returns to Christine’s room and she's gone he calls out her name a few times and then goes “Little Lottie? Angel?”
When phantom comes out of his hiding spot after “all I ask of you” he's very saddened and sounds more in despair than angry and then when he faintly hears all I ask of you again he covers his ears and goes “Please…please stop”
An acting choice I noticed that I thought was really interesting was the Phantom would cover his ears when someone said something that hurt him or he didn't want to hear he’d cover his ears. In the final lair, he does it when Raoul says “Why make her lie to you, to save me” and when Christine mentions that “it's in your soul where the true distortion lies”
Also Madame giry was drunk in masquerade and I wanted to point that out
Cut content!
Surprisingly I didn't mind the things that were cut because it was a lot easier for me to root for and enjoy the phantom without them and there were a lot of more interesting moments. such as:
There is no mannequin Christine, instead he shows Christine a collection of his music and she becomes so excited and enthralled by it that she willingly sits on the blanket he set down for her in the lair.
Because of this Christine doesn't faint and when the lights go out at the end of the number it's shown that she fell asleep in his lair.
Phantom doesn't kick Christine out of his lair, she hands the mask back to him and he seems to calm down and forgive her before we cut to the next scene “notes”
Overall phantom was a lot more sad then menacing if that makes sense
Prima donna had a pink back drop and rose petals falling from the sky???? Could I ask for more
All I ask of you is where Raoul proposes and it's so adorable. He gets down on both knees and lives were changed
They hug mostly but kiss at the end and the way Georgina delivers the line “Say you love me” all giddy and hoping up and down was so cute
• Skipping to “Wishing you were somehow here again” Christine is on the rooftop where all I ask of you took place and is low-key contemplating suicide. She gets to the tip of the building’s ledge and looks down before starting to sing
After that phantom appears but because of the previous context he comes off a lot softer? If that makes sense he doesn't seem like he's pretending to be her father but trying to be a comforter. Raoul arrives and sings his Bits but it's like no one can hear him until he directly intervenes. When he does snap Christine out of it she nearly falls off the roof but he catches her.
He doesn't have a weapon or seems to want to get violelt but rather apprehend the phantom but Christine stops him and the phantom sort of eggs them on to leave. “Go go- now let this be war upon you both”
During the point of no return, he seems genuinely surprised and kinda flustered when Christine starts Flirting? Getting into it? You know it was giving asexual phantom according to my friend and I live for that
At the end of point of no return phantom takes off the mask himself but Christine isn't afraid. He sings “All I Ask of You” (Phantoms version) before women in the ensemble scream in terror at his face and he runs off with Christine
NO WEDDING DRESS THANK GOD
When raoul gets into the lair phantom is genuinely eager for him to come down. He doesn't use a “magic lasso” but instead uses the rope used to hold the boat in place and then ties raouls neck to the pole.
when he wants Christine to choose already she's holding his book of music and in a fit of rage he ends up ripping a page off when Christine starts singing to him he realizes this and is both saddened and panics as he tries fixing the page. He whispers “no” to this as Christine sings her final verses of final lair.
This part:
Pitiful creature of darkness...
What kind of life have you known?
God, give me courage to show you,
You are not alone!
She kisses the phantom and then they do the most romantic build-up into a hug I’ve ever seen with her holding his chin before he wraps his arms around her and they both hug and I died it was so cute.
The ending plays out the same with phantom agreeing to let them go BUT Raoul tries to give the phantom his mask back but the phantom lets him keep it, which will be important later. Phantom pushes the boat away with raoul and christine on it so they can escape while he cries to his music box. He hears all I ask of you again but he doesn’t block it out at first he smiles at Christine’s verse but then frowns as he hears Raoul and realizes he did lose her. And this time its for good.
The show ends with old man Raoul holding the phantom mask and Christine dancing similarly to a wind-up ballet doll in her angel / Masquerade costume. And the stage lights up the area of the phantom's lair with the music box still in place. I think this implies Christine was the angel of music all along.
#poto musical#poto middle east tour#Apologise if this is messy I tried my best to remember everything
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