#ill never be as cool as u when i stick my tongue out but its ok youll do it for all of us bkg<3
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// weed, // kinda meanie xiao :( he calls u a good girl ^_^ // fem reader // he burns u wit his joint lol
this is my first work!! im rly bad as i never done it before but i wanted to get this out:3 ill make a part 2 if any of u want it!! || dni minors ||
stoner xiao who wants his darling to smoke with him, no matter how hard they beg him to stop, he wont budge!! he wants his darling to feel good like him!! he’ even got you à pretty piece for u to smoke out of!! like a hello kitty pipe or bong, and pink rolling papers!!^_^
when ur sitting on his lap while hes rolling a joint at his desk, energy drink cans all over his desk makes u whine at the mess, you always tell him how much you hate the mess!! but he doesnt care. if its a problem, u should clean it then. turning around to put ur hands over ur chest, puffing ur cheeks, he notices ur sudden attitude and sighs,
“what’s with you?” he speaks, eyes not moving from the joint in his hands as he finishes rolling it, taking the joint into his hands, he looks into ur eyes with a smirk. “lick here.” voice stern, not wanting to have to repeat himself.
you dont move, no word escapes your lips as you look at him with confused eyes, tilting your head to the side. “what?” you ask, a hinge of bitchiness in ur words makes him scoff and roll his eyes.
“are you dumb? i said lick.” he moves the joint closer to ur lips. when you dont stick ur tongue out, he rolls his eyes, using his free hand to use two fingers to put into ur mouth, tugging on ur tongue. you whine when u feel the cool contact of the pads of his fingers touch ur warm muscle, instinctively, you start licking at his fingers instead of the paper.
“the paper, not my fingers, dumb bitch. have i not fucked enough sense into you?” he spoke bluntly, removing the fingers from your mouth, he uses that hand to smack your cheek, squishing your cheeks together cooing at you when he hears your whines. “you’re so so so cute baby.” he hums, rubbing your red cheek ‘n smiling softly, a sigh coming past his lips. “do you understand what i mean? i said lick the paper, please.” he spoke softly, still, with a stern tone.
you whined softly ‘n nodded, giving little kitten licks to the paper infront of ur face, trying to avoid eye contact with him as you licked, too embarrassed to stare at him while ur tongue is lapping at the paper that keeps the joint together.
“wasn’t that hard, was it? good girl.” xiao caressed ur thigh with his free hand, running circles along ur soft skin which made u whine, ur hips stuttering on his lap.
you hum at the pet name, feeling goosebumps rise on ur skin as he touched ur thighs, lookin down to see him playing with the thigh highs you love to wear for him, they were pink with white lace at the top, the fabric tight on ur skin to make ur thighs slightly pool over the thin fabric. xiao loved it. xiao is 100% a thigh guy idc he loves thighs especially fat ones
a minute or two passes that he’s been playing with your thighs, earning small whines n whimpers from you as he snapped the fabric back so it hits ur skin, the skin slowly turning red from how tight the fabric is against ur plush flesh. xiao hums, picking up the joint from his desk as he seemed to forgot about it, your body distracted him so much from what he was meant to do :( you’re so mean to him!!
xiao holds the joint between his lips, fetching the lighter from the drawer in his desk, he lights the joint, taking a drag as ur still seated on his lap. he laughed slightly as the smoke hit ur face, making you whine and hit his chest with ur fists. “stop! i already told you i dont like it..” xiao scoffs at ur protests, mocking ur whines. he takes the joint between his lips again, taking a long hit and blowing it into ur face again, watching the way ur eyebrows furrow, ur lips form into a pout and trying to escape his grasp he had on ur hips.
“stop moving. i bought you cute shit too and u dont even use it, you just bitch ‘n whine.” xiao tsked, placing the joint down into the ashtray, his hand that was once holding the joint, now on ur hip. “why not, too much of a baby to handle it?”
you shake ur head repeatedly at his remark, bouncing on his lap slowly as you keep whining. “ ‘m not! jus don’t like… the smell..” you spoke softly, looking into his eyes, they were starting to droop and turn red, the weed hitting him pretty quickly. you have to admit, he did look very pretty in this state, the way his eyes were lidded, ‘n the way his voice was softer, raspy, making you fall more in love with him. sure, you didnt really like how he always smoked, maybe he was right. you could try it!! he did buy u pretty pieces too…
but you’re not a baby!! u wanna prove him wrong n show him u can be jus like him!! it took u a minute to really think about if you should do it or not, like there was a devil and an angel on ur shoulder. you sigh and take the joint from the tray, hands shaking slightly as u hold it to ur lips, taking a small hit, you breath the smoke into ur lungs, coughing as it escapes your lips, earning a small chuckle from xiao as he watches your reaction to the smoke.
xiao looked at you with wide eyes, seeing as you took the joint from the ash tray and in between ur lips. he tsked as he took the joint from ur hands, seeing as there was now lip gloss stained on it.
“wasn’t that bad was it huh? how do you feel baby.” xiao looked at ur dazed expression, chucking softly as ur face turned red from all the coughing you’ve done, handing you a bottle of water from his desk. “here, i didn’t even tell you to do it, guess all that talk has gotten into ur skull finally, huh?” you nod while drinking the water, an “aah” sound coming from ur lips as u downed the water, resting ur head onto his chest, feeling his heartbeat against ur ears, lulling you into a state of calm.
xiao used one hand to rub ur back, adjusting himself in his gamer chair so you two could sit comfortably, the other hand holds the joint back to his lips, taking a long drag. drag after drag, he taps ur thigh, tryin to get ur attention. “you want another? almost done. prolly can get one or two more puffs out this.” he asks, you shake your head n whine, lifting ur head to look him in the eyes, bloodshot eyes meeting his, making him chuckle at ur expression. “oh baby, you’re gone huh. and you only had one hit. such a baby..” xiao coos, pinching ur cheek with his fingers. he took the last two hits from the joint, throwing his head back as the thc was flowing thru his bloodstream, tilting his head to the side. you take note of his neck on full display, n take advantage of it. you smirk slightly n lift ur head up, latching your lips onto his jaw, suckling on the soft skin, earning a groan from the man under you. “fuck… stop doin” that.” xiao mumbles, ashing the joint onto ur thigh, which made u flinch n lift ur head up to meet his eyes.
“w-what the fuck, xiao?!” you whimpered loudly, rubbing ur hand into ur thigh, trying to ease the burning pain on ur leg.
it only made his smirk grow wider to see your reaction, you used to beg him to mark you, hit you, hurt you. but now you’re complaining? what’s gotten into you lately? does xiao need to fuck more sense into you, that you belong to him? only he can do these things to you?
part 2? ^_^
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spilled coffee
overview: spencer mistakenly spills his coffee all over reader's stuff on a case, but it turns into a happy accident (based on this request)
genre: fluff :)
a/n: ok so i think this is so cute and ive been meaning to write something ab coffee art for so long im so hapoy i got sent this request! as always lmk what u guys think of it :)
masterlist
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you sat at a raggedy table, spitballing with the team in a run down police station in the absolute middle of nowhere. your notebook was open wide in front of you, the blank page taunting your inability to make a good assessment of this unsub.
"hey guys, i think i've got something," Spencer announced, walking into the room.
"thank God," you murmured under your breath.
he began walking over to the board, setting down his coffee next to you. except he accidentally bumped the corner of the table as he crossed the room, consequently knocking over his cup and spilling coffee all over your paper.
he gasped, profusely apologizing and you assured him that it was ok as you wiped it off as best you could, urging him to say what he came to say about the case.
you left your notebook out to dry and the next couple of days went by very quickly, and you nearly forgot about it. it wasn't until you were all packing up that Spencer handed it to you.
"im so sorry again, ill buy you a knew one." he offered.
"no its ok! it just has some character now!" you explained, thumbing through the pages, now stiff and various shades of brown, "mmm and it smells like coffee."
"i'm gonna find a way to make it up to you." he stated as the two of you walked out of the room.
the jet ride was going to be long, and everyone was schlumped, meaning it would be void of fun commentary and be even more long and unbearable.
you sighed, flipping through your stained notebook before getting to the exact page the coffee had been spilled onto. it might have been the lighting on the jet, or maybe the sleepiness on your eyes, but the longer you stared at the blob, the more it looked like a person.
a person you knew... someone with wavy hair that stuck up in all directions, someone who had a cute button nose, someone with kind eyes and a bright smile. someone with an iq of 187 and a particular interest in halloween and chocolate frosted donuts with sprinkles.
the coffee stain looked just like Spencer.
you rubbed your eyes a couple of times but nope, he was still there, in the coffee stain.
you couldn't help but think you were going a little crazy. you had liked him for quite some time, maybe you were just seeing him in everything now. maybe to everyone else it just looked like a coffee blob?
regardless, you took out your pen and started sketching. outlining his perfectly messy hair. and his defined jaw and cheek bones. and his puckered up, oval, kissable lips, curled up in a smile. and his little boop-able nose. and his off center tie.
you weren't sure how long you had been drawing, or how many times you had looked over at Reid to make sure you were getting him down correctly. and yes you were.
all the other times you had secretly sketched him it never turned out right. there was always something that made it like someone looks like Spencer. but never quite him.
until now.
because somehow, this spilled coffee sketch had perfectly captured his essence. maybe because he was the one that spilled it? maybe it had to be done together to look right?
whatever it was you just couldn't stop staring at the wonderful accident that you and him had created.
you looked up again to see him walking over and quickly flipped your notebook to the other side, trying hard to hide your drawing.
"hey," he smiled sitting down across from you.
"hey," you replied, voices low to avoid waking up the team.
"what were you drawing?" he asked innocently.
"oh..uh nothing," you denied quickly.
"oh come on you know how much i love your doodles, show me!"
"you've seen my doodles," you face palmed.
"yes! and i love them! especially the little flower chains you border your paper with sometimes," he giggled.
"well this one..it um didn't turn out right, you wont like it."
"i doubt that."
you sighed, giving into his pleading eyes, "here."
he flipped it over, eyes going wide and mouth hanging open, "WOAH!"
"shhh!! they're sleeping!" you whispered, pointing at the rest of the team.
"y/n! this is absolutely incredible! how did you- out of a coffee spill- and it looks so- wow. i-" he looked up at you, a huge smile stretching across his face, "i'm honored that you chose to draw me. thank you."
"you're welcome, i've tried to draw you before but i could never get it right until now," you admitted, feeling your cheeks heat up.
his eyes softened.
"nothing says Spencer Reid like spilled coffee," he joked, making you smile. "but how come you didn't add yourself?"
"what?" you chuckled.
"theres a second blob here. right next to me," he pointed.
"yeah but that just looks like... a blob."
"no! that looks exactly like you! look theres your hair, and your eyes, and even the height difference is right!" he explained excitedly, grabbing your pen, "may i?"
you nodded and watched him get to work, sticking his tongue out as he focused. his approach was much different then yours, he drew connected, long shaky lines, and even though it didn't match the style you drew him in it was still perfect. and it still looked just like you.
he finished up, adding his last touches before pushing the paper back towards you.
"spence, i love it!" you breathed, holding it up in-front of you as you felt your heart begin to swell. "look at us. Spencer and y/n"
"Spencer and y/n." he echoed, liking the way your name felt in his mouth.
you smiled, "we forgot to sign."
"oh, right," he stammered, taking the pen and signing at the bottom corner before passing it to you and watching you do the same.
"something is off," you frowned.
"no! i think we look good together." he countered, wondering if you would catch the hint.
"no.." you sighed, taking the paper and holding it close as you scrawled something else.
his heart sank. rejection. you were probably scribbling out his face. or drawing a line between the two of you. this was gonna hurt.
you dropped the notebook back in front of him with a happy sigh. he brought his eyes up, wishing you'd at least had the decency to not show him.
but when he looked he was surprised. pleasantly surprised.
a large heart floated above your heads in the picture.
he grinned at you, his heart making its way back up to his chest from inside his stomach.
"i think we look great together." you grinned back.
his fingers grazed yours on top of the table.
"i agree." he breathed, looking like the physical embodiment of heart eyes.
"hey lovebirds," morgan groaned, "i'm so happy for you but please shut up and let me sleep."
you two chuckled, both whispering an apology, grinning ear to ear.
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ultra mega super cool taglist:
@mac99martin @imhreid @spencersmagic @hollydaisy23 @raelady1184 @a-broken-pact @padfootswife @hey-there-angels @star-stuff-in-the-cosmos @sonnydoesrandomshit @averyhotchner @laurakirsten0502 @reidyoulikeabook @rem-ariiana @spencerreid9 @takeyourleap-of-faith @vampire-overlord @spenxerslut @violetspoetic @aperrywilliams @b-a-utiful @eevee0722 @srhxpci @reidemandweep @imdefinitelyfloating @random-human-person @gurkiloni
#criminal minds#spencer reid#reid#spencer reid fanfic#spencer reid x reader#spencer reid x you#spencer reid fluffy#spencer reid x reader fluff#spencer reid fluff#spencer reid imagine#bau x reader#bau#platonic!bau x reader#criminal minds fluff#aaron hotchner#derek morgan#penelope garcia#emily prentiss#jennifer jereau#david rossi#garcia#hotch#morgan#rossi#prentiss#jj#criminal minds x reader
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hey lovely !!!
was abt to type this ask but HOLD ON promiscuous just came on my shuffle of all my music as i’m typing this…….. the stars are aligning just for you <3
ok question for you!! do furtana play any imessage/gamepigeon games together?? i feel like they get rly competitive w them n i wouldn’t wanna be in the room when one of them loses at 8ball 💔 what are their favorites n who usually wins!!
while on the topic of mario kartie also feel free to extend this to any other games they play like mario kart !!
this is also an invitation to ramble abt any aspect of furtana or vb au :-) i am here n ready to sip on my loving vb au juice!!! 💗
hi angel!!
omg promiscuous,,, some icon shit right there i can't believe ur music did that for me <3
aksdlhfl anyway on to ur question!! had to look up what games are available on imessage/gamepigeon lmao but yea they do for sure! not all the time but it happens in bursts, especially when they're far away from e/o (sure lima and ny aren't that far apart but like u get my point aksdhf). like finn will be bored n missing kurtana so he starts a game with each of them and they play obsessively for a few days and then nothing happens for a while,, then santana travels for a vb tournament and starts up some games during her bus/plane ride and they all play obsessively again for like a week,,, and the cycle continues.. they all agreed that playing all together in the same building was Dangerous bc of how competitive they get so it only really happens when they santana can't get physical when they santana lose (or are poor winners santana),, or if there are other people who can interfere if necessary kdfhgsl
ill put the specific games i can think of under the break adhfkajd i got carried away rambling again,,, speaking of which, i think we should also play imessage games together <333
kurt is def into word games! i think he and finn would enjoy games like words with friends or hangman together bc they both gotta keep those brain cells working and finn takes great pleasure in trying to include the dumbest words he can think of,,, he doesn't really care if he wins or loses against kurt (though he gets really proud when he wins and brags to santana) bc furt are like,, relatively cool-headed when it comes to word games so they can actually play together in the same room without breaking anything,,,, and finn does his best to make Kurt laugh with his word choices bc watching kurt go from his serious lil thinking pout to a lil giggle (or better yet, a proper burst of laughter) is delightful
i think kurt would also be down to play chess with santana (im assuming there is some form of a chess thing on imessage? i found one called chess42 so im rolling with that) bc its the kind of game where she's too focused on strategy to really get aggressively competitive. like she spends so time working on vb plays that kurt goes "u need a break pls just play a game with me" and then sighs when she chooses chess and pores over every single move she makes bc it defeats the purpose of making her take a break. also she tends to win. like a lot. he knows damn well that she played chess online a lot growing up n during classes and has slowly but surely honed her skills. and then when they finish a game santana immediately texts him and is like "its ur turn to start a new one" and bugs him until he does,,,, he is so done w her but he does it anyway <3
as for finntana,, them + 8 ball or cup pong,,, chaotic finntana live in my head rent free i will never stop rambling about them being dumb bitches together,,, pls i am picturing finn sticking his tongue out slightly in concentration as he tries to align his shot properly but then his finger slips at the last second and he misses the ball he was aiming for and anyone in the vicinity hears a very loud pained groan,,, santana travelling w her team and making her entire squad shut up partway through a conversation (repeatedly) so she can focus on 8 ball with the sole purpose of destroying finn,,, also imagine them playng it while drunk,,, squinting at their screens like idiots n everything
also? trivia crack? i know i had a phase where my friend group and i would play constantly and i think that's the main game where they are tempting fate if they play in the same room,,, they all have their niche areas of random knowledge so they are heavily reliant on getting questions that are easy for them in order to win and when their luck turns against them they are all ready to throw hands,,, blaine once suggested it when he visited kurt's family for thanksgiving and regretted it bc there was so much yelling,, an endless chorus of "fuck u" "yeah well fuck u too" while their parents vacated the room,,, finn's dogs getting overly excited so there's barking in addition to the yelling,,,, it only ends when santana and finn start throwing cushions at e/o and a lamp ends up broken,,, they both blame kurt when carole asks about it,,,
#kdshl brain is too fried to think past imessage games for now#but if u remind me tmo or over the weekend i will gladly talk more about them!!!#they >>>>>>>#ask md#thank u for giving me the opportunity to gush about them literally whenever ksdhkfsdgh ily <3#i think this is a good way for me to end my day#very needed positive vibes u have no idea#mist <3#vb au asks#vb au thoughts#furtana
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Request for anon: Ah!! My bad!! Didn't know you couldn't write controversial stuff!! I'll be happy to resend the ask!))May I have Enji, Bakugo, and Deku with a very punk S/O?-Anarchy anon
Bakugou:
• He thinks its very entertaining.
• V e r y
• He likes what you wear 🥺🥺
• He thinks they suit you
• they match your skin
• and your body
• thigh highs?? Yes.
• skirts??? He loves it
• tight jeans?? Baby pop the duck off
• studded collar? Y e s
• all your bracelets? Shits dope as duck
• Listen I know his parents literally work in fashion- but he did not inherit the genes needed to be good at it
• so you're gonna have to help hi
• and your make up blows him away
• You teach him how to do eyeliner
• bc we all know he abuses the power
• so you sit him down and you show him how you do yours
• and then you give him an extra eyeliner pen and he copies each step
• Now his eyeliner is sharp as fuck
• its great
• he'll help you dye your hair
• which you love because the feeling of him playing with you hair or running his fingers through it to even out the dyed strands feels like heaven
• you've fallen asleep from it before
• he thinks its funny
• bc here you are
• big scary punk babe
• falling asleep bc he's playing w your fucking hair
• HE LOVES YOUR ATTITUDE
• There just this ion give a fuck attitude that punks have
• and he lives for it
• except when it comes to school
• or anything else productive
• so basically just when you're dealing with other people
• bc he's absolutely on your ass about grades
• he'll come w you to get new piercings
• stick n pokes are a no go tho
• seriously he'll flip lmaoo
Deku-
• Bro you and Dekj are literally the opposite
• he's ✨🧚♀️🥰😍💋💫❣❣
• a fucking bottom
• and youre 🤬👺😈💢♠️⛓💉🩸🗡
• its very amusing to see a babey decked out in black and blue and purple with crazy fucking hair, screamjng profanities at some bitch who had the misfortune of messing w ur bf
• and then a broccoli boy w green hair panicked and trying to pull you away from the fight
• :)
• he's enamored with your makeup tho
• heavy eyeliner?? Yes
• blush??? Yes.
• eyeliner in places thats not your fucking eye? Yes.
• Black lipstick? Yes.
• Babey wants to try and to it 🥺
• its harder than he thinks
• he's looking at the best he just made on your eyelids and he's like 😓
• he likes to try on your jewelry too!!
• just chill with it throughout the day
• like he'll walk into class one day wearing your spiked choker and no one bats an eye
• bc they just know
• its a deku thing
• or he'll come in wearing your cool hand chain things on days they don't have to train
• or your bracelets!
• also?? He sees your coping method of piercings
• and that you do them yourself
• and he'll watch as you do it like 🥰🥰
• he'll make sure its all safe tho!!!
• just because you're punk doesn't mean you can't be safe!!!!
• he likes to see all your cool pins :(
• he'll steal those too
• @ arthur making a fist meme pin
• your favorite one
• he SNATCHES
• HE JUST TAKES IT
• AND YOURE LOOKING FOR IT
• UNTIL ONE DAY YOU SEE IT ON HIS MOTHER FUCKING BACKPACK
• n your like sir??????
• whomst??
• you can't take it from him tho 😔
• he's just too cute and he'd be sad if you took it
• he'll sometimes pick your outfit to go out
• or he'll have you style something he can wear so he looks 😤😤 too
• and its a vibe
Enji:
• You'd never think
• THE Enji Todoroki
• would end up
• w someone
• like
• you
• He's a very composed man
• He dresses well, expensive designer brands
• he's always put together and well-mannered (for the most part)
• and then there's you
• the fucking gremlin from hell that runs on caffeine and energy drinks that looks like a hottopic advertisement
• Its awesome tbh
• Shouto LOVES you
• Bc you're in your late 20's- Early 30's and you fr just living not giving a shit
• Not acting like his mother
• knowing you have like 0 authority over him
• just fucking vibing
• And somehow you managed to snag his dad??
• youre the embodiment of ill marry your date and make you my stepson bitch
• he's like yo, I see you
• Enji lowkey (highkey he just doesn't think its obvious) finds it hot
• that you dress the way you too
• and your attitude
• it just does things to him
• he just really really likes the vibe
• theres an excitement of finally just letting go and saying fuck it after a long day of being composed
• and it appeals to him
• I feel like lowkey part of the punk vibe is making/thrifting/mismatching clothes and just good hard as fuck
• like
• I got these pants from Walmart, this shirt from 7/11 that I cut up and I found these shoes behind the dumpster of an Arby's so here we fucking go
• so when he buys you fancy and expensive punk shit you're like 😤😤😤
• but also like 👁👁
• bc get that bread sis
• mans just watches you kill your hair with bleach and hair dye
• "Would you like me to call and schedule and appointment with Fuyumis hair stylist?" He asks with confusion
"No!! We're fucking shit up is what we're doing. We HAVE to do it this way!!!!"
"Okay, would you like help? I can try the best I'm able to,"
"Aw bby, help is for the week."
• you end up needing help to get the back lmaoooo
• you do your own haircuts
• bc like I said
• fucking shit up
• thats the vibe
• m u l l e t
• PLEASE
• or you know the girls that cut lil bits of their hair so short it looks like lil horns??
• please do that
• I promise he'll get rlly soft about it
• "I believe it suits you," he'll say softly, running his fingers through the ends of your hair
"Thanks, I fucked it up and went for it."
• he tends not to curse as much
• so
• :)
• you'll curse for him
• some shit goes wrong? You're right next to him?
• get ready for the storm bb
• "oh you mother fucking cu-"
• he honestly doesn't mind the mouth
• bc like I said before
• its refreshing for him to know he can come home and not be expected to be composed
• He will absolutely be willing to pay for whatever tattoos you want
• and honestly just take him up on it bc tattoos are expensive like
• 3 letters is like 150 bruh
• but!! Piercings are done at home!
• unless they're in your mouth :)
• tongue piercing or that peircing above your teeth
• he won't let you do shit like that at home
• when you did get them he helped you take care of them
• but esr piercings are free game
• overall he's very very supportive in the way you dress and act all around• he really doesn't mind at all
#bnha bakugo katsuki#alpha bakugou katsuki#katsuki bakugo x reader#bakugou katsuki#mha katsuki#bakugou x reader#Deku x reader#deku#izuku midoryia x reader#izuku midoryia#midoryia x reader#midoryia#todoroki enji#enji todoroki#enji x reader#todoroki x reader#omegaverse my hero academia#my hero academia omegaverse#my hero academia x reader#my hero academia
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Can we have more details about why Lime and Mochi hated each other for the first 5 years and what were they like to one another during that time period? ^u^
YEAH!!!!! (ill put it under the cut)
➞
- mochi and lime first met when they were like. 5-ish, on the day when mochi and her mama (tiramisu) were moving/finished moving into their shop across the street, and limes family brought them over some welcome-to-the-district gifts
- so of course tiramisu and limes grandparents are chatting it up, mochi is kind of hiding behind her mom and lime is standing there holding kiwis hand and theyre just kinda looking at each other
- and this first meeting is the most hilarious moment of their whole relationship, because lime, an idiot boy, sticks his tongue out and does a “bleh!” at mochi
- mochi, an equally stupid kid, starts crying ghibli tears, and deadass just FLIPS HIM OFF!!!!🖕🖕🖕🖕
- AND HER MOM PUSHES HER HAND DOWN LIKE “MOCHI THATS NOT NICE!! Oh my god im so sorry idont know where she learned that haha-” (mochi learned it from her. shes secretly proud of her baby), and limes grandfather just kind of “oh no no its fine, he was being mean to her”
- and so they say goodnight and go back to their shops, but from that point lime just kinda picked on mochi a lot. (im thinking he had a crush on her first but didnt understand feelings that young so he just picks on her a lot????/ and then just kinda buries and internalizes those feelings for the rest of his life so it gets brushed under the rug????)
- so he would pull her hair, push her, call her names, steal her food, all this weird shit. but then he would also like sneakily like peer out of his window at night to see if she was there in her room (and slam the curtains closed when she looked over and pretended like he wasnt looking) and like spy on her when she was in the shop (and run away when kiwi asks what hes looking at)
- and of course, mochi, being the badass in training, wouldnt take his shit half the time, and im pretty sure she like punched him in the face once?? or body slammed him or something??? and her mom is like “MOCHI OH MY GOD NO!! THATS NOT GOOD!!! [internally] (i love you so much that’s my girl)”
- and then when school starts they have to go to school together with kiwi because mochis mom has to run the shop, the whole way there these two idiot kids are either fighting or lime is picking on mochi again (tiramisu tells mochi its because he likes her and shes like idont care!! hes mean!!!)(she will care later)
- and from when lime was about ??? 5-7 he was friends with oscar, but when they were 7 oscar moved away to the big city with his family, and so limes only ‘friend’ left was mochi
- im pretty sure lime has put a frog in her backpack before
- and has probably thrown mud on her
- and every christmas they never get each other anything because “why should i, idont care!!”
- SO THEN. WHEN SCHOOL COMES AROUND, THEY BOTH GET COMPETITIVE, AND FOR THE NEXT LIKE 4 YEARS ALL THEY DO IS ANNOY EACH OTHER ON THE WAY TO SCHOOL, COMPETE IN SPORTS, COMPETE OVER GRADES, LIMES THROWING PAPER WADS AT THE BACK OF HER HEAD (he sits behind her) THEM BOTH GETTING SENT TO DETENTION, MAKING THEM SPEND MORE TIME TOGETHER LMFAO
- but also theyre kind of getting to know each other, and the fighting dies down into a more kind of rivalry with some making fun of each other, but push comes to shove most of their time is actually spent with each other, between running neighboring shops, sharing classes and sports, the commerce back and forth from school (especially since kiwi starts going to high school and they have to walk home alone together)
- (and this is also during the time when mochi is spending her weekends with her grandma training)
- and im thinking when theyre like….11-12 ish maybe?? (theyre still in the rivalry thing) theres this part in one of their normal school days where mochi is ACTUALLY being bullied by some older boys. like knock the books out of her hand and steal her money kind of bullying
- and lime sees this and he’s yeah, no. so he goes over and tells them to back the FUCK off, and of course they don't, and lime gets PISSED because IM THE ONLY ONE WHO’S ALLOWED TO BULLY HER ALRIGHT which actually leads to an actual fistfight, and this is also hilarious because lime is her hero for like 2 seconds before she mcfuckin kicks one of the guys in the shin and/or balls and lime is all “???????!!!/!?!? you can fight???” and mochi, sweating, just kinda nervously looks away like “uuu.h.h.hhhhh….n……..no…”
- so after the fight theyre just awkwardly sitting in the principals office, lime has a black eye, theyre both all stressed out hoping the school doesn’t call their parents, but the principal is cool about it and tells them “you were just defending yourselves, just go home and dont get in anymore trouble okay”
- and on the way home theyre both pretty quiet, mochi is kind of flustered because that was..pretty cool of him to stick up for me like that and lime is stressed out like fuck oh no oh god because hes SUPPOSED to NOT like her so why should i care??? if she gets bullied??? I don't!! but he does and it nags at him
- mochi keeps glancing over at him waiting at the bus stop, and he notices, (his face is red too) so hes like “what? why do you keep looking at me for??” and she hesitantly asks “hows your eye?”
- lime, nervously, just kind of babbles out “pft- its fine. doesnt affect how handsome my face is so-” to which she kind of gives him a flat look, but laughs at it a bit anyway. he stares at her for a bit before laughing for a while too. she asks if it hurts, and he just kind goes “eh” and mentions it would feel a lot better if he had like an ice pack or something
- so mochi notices a small convince shop nearby, and tells him to wait there. she comes back with a little ice pack thing and like. a popsicle or something for him. he blushes and thanks her and they just kinda go back to sitting in silence at the bus stop, before mochi says a quiet “…thank you for- sticking up for me back there-” and gives him this sweet cute lil smile
- and he, an idiot, just like rubs the back of the neck, and has to physically stop himself from blurting out some “whatever” or “yeah it wont happen again” or some other shit like that, so after about 30 seconds of silence he just kind of mumbles out a “you're welcome”
- and from this point their relationship is a little different. like they both kinda go home and realize they were just jerks to each other for no real reason, especially lime who now thinks shes not so bad and he didn't even know how or why they got off on the wrong foot in the first place
- meanwhile mochi is at home struggling with feelings because “gosh that actually was really cool of him to stick up for me. he really actually is cool what the heck. oh no”
- and they start being less idiotic and mean to each other (besides the occasional joking) and actually spend more time together, and eventually they like bring each other food for lunch and talk to each other about their interests and stuff, and lime invites mochi to come todont watch his baseball games, and mochi supports him at all his sports events and stuff.
- and they don't really realize or say it yet but they're best friends already. they're closest to each other and spend like almost all their time together
- (and im VERY sure theres gonna be some HORRIBLY embarrassing incident for lime that will have no details, but throughout the story it will be mentioned a few times by lime, something like “Mochi will NEVER think I’m cool!! She’s already seen me with that whole thing with the monk seal, and the shampoo bottle, there is no coming back from that!!” and everyone is just kinda “?????? what??” but it never gets unpacked. all we know is that is was REALLY embarrassing and uncool)
- but she does. she thinks hes cool. she thinks he is SO cool. she lays awake at night thinking about him
- and during this whole time mochi is getting to know the actual lime, and shes slowly developing a huge crush on him, which she first excuses as “noo its just a summer crush thing ill get over it” but she never does
- basically they were really idiot kids but i like the growing up dynamic
#chelseadanger#ask#long post#i love them as kids#bpp#bullet point posts#the misc adventures of mochi and lime#limochi#text
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Sweet Dreams Chapter Six
Lucid dreaming: The process of being aware that one is dreaming. Some researchers believe that in lucid dreaming, the individual may be able to change the outcome of the dream or control their degree of participation in the imaginary (dream) environment.
Description: Lee Eunbyul has been plagued with hellish nightmares since she was a child. Not the sort of nightmares you may be familiar with. There are no monsters to evade, no serial killers to outrun, no auditoriums of classmates in front of whom to stand naked. Instead there is just…darkness. Endless darkness. With professional help, the dreams come less frequently. But after moving away from home to live with her sister, Eunbyul’s nightmare returns, only this time it’s different. This time…she’s not alone.
What would you do if you had the chance to change the outcome of not only your dreams, but your life?
Genre: Romance, Drama, Fluff, Angst, Slow Burn
Pairing: Namjoon x (f) OC
Word Count: 7.2k
Tags: Non-Idol!Au, Producer!Namjoon, Bookstore Clerk!Seokjin, Potter!Jimin, Producer!Yoongi, Dancer!Hoseok
Warnings: Frequent mentions of mental illness, infrequent swearing and mentions of alcohol
A/N: Hey guys! Here’s the newest chapter~ I hope you guys are enjoying this series! I’m really enjoying writing it. This chapter in particular was v fun to write. Anyway, I hope everybody is resting enough these days! Please don’t be shy and send feedback, critique, questions, theories, and comments my way. I’ll be sure to respond to all asks I receive within a day of receiving them!
And again, if you want to follow my Twitter, my username is @/plzpunchmebts. I’m super active over there and hopefully in the future I’ll do some livestreams/chats with you all!
- Mercury
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Masterlist
Weekly updates: Sunday, 1PM (PST)
Namjoon
“K-i-m-N-a-m-j-o-o-n-.”
I startled a little and rubbed my eyes, squinting at the person who’d roused my attention. Jisoo stood beside my desk, furry brows raised. It had been a few days since he’d bothered to check on me, and seeing the look on his face now I was sure he regretted not coming sooner.
“Been trying to get you to notice for a minute, dude,” he said, patting my shoulder as he raised a mug of hot coffee to his lips. He stared over my shoulder at the monitor before me. “You making good progress with the commercial soundtrack?”
I swallowed hard and stared at the half-finished track on Cubase. Uninspired. The project window was home to several presets from the preloaded packs on the software, nothing like what I’d use at home on my own. It sounded fine so far, or as fine as it could. But there was no heart in it, not really. Instead, it sounded as hollow as it did commercial. I was sure the client would like it. What concerned me, really, was finding the strength to finish it.
“Uh, yeah. Should be done by tomorrow,” I said, and even my voice was lackluster. I pinched my nose bridge and rubbed circles, squeezing my eyes shut.
“You okay?” asked Jisoo, but it was clear from his tone that he was only halfway interested.
“Yeah, fine,” I said, waving a hand. “I’m cool. Just…tired I guess.”
He hummed. “Gotta sleep well if you wanna be a producer.”
I nodded, but couldn’t help but think of Yoongi. He was working as a real producer, and there wasn’t a single night in recent memory when I could remember him going to sleep before the sun rose.
“Thanks, Boss,” I said, offering a smile.
He patted my shoulder. “Take care of yourself, okay? We can’t afford to lose you,” he said with a laugh. It was the uneasy sort of chuckle you give someone when you want them to reassure you.
I nodded. “I don’t have anywhere else to go anyway,” I said as he smiled and walked back out to the floor. I sighed and again pinched my nose bridge.
“Hey,” said Jungkook from his desk, staring at me with knitted brows. “You really don’t look so good.”
I smiled and waved my hand. “Don’t worry about me.”
“Saying that makes me more worried,” he said, resting a round cheek in his hand. “What’s going on with you? For real?”
I inhaled sharply and sighed, shutting my eyes. “Just…I dunno, I feel kinda sick today I guess. Haven’t been sleeping well, and I woke up…forget it, alright? I’m fine.”
“No, keep going,” said Jungkook, and coming from anyone else I might have thought he was teasing me. But this was Jungkook anyway, and he only seemed to know how to be sincere. He kept his eyes on me.
I shrugged. “Woke up kinda sad.”
Jungkook raised his brows. “Huh?”
“Forget it.”
He shook his head. “No reason for it?”
I thought a moment, puzzled. “Well…it’s not like usual, you know? Like when you just feel sad and you can’t really diagnose it,” I said, nodding. “It feels like there’s something really important that I’m missing.”
Jungkook hummed. “Maybe it has to do with work?” he offered, tilting his head with a sigh. “We all know working here isn’t your number one choice.”
I quieted down, staring at the project on my screen with furrowed brow. While I was sure it wasn’t something so simple, that the real cause was still evading me, his words unsettled me. “Maybe…,” I said, shaking my head.
I reached into my pocket and pulled out my cell phone, typing a message as quickly as I could before returning to the track.
Namjoon: Hey, Hoseok. Haven’t seen you in a few weeks. Wanna go to the beach?
Hoseok: huhuhu…u gonna collect crabs the whole time?
Namjoon: …
Namjoon: Crabs are fascinating…
Hoseok: looooooooooooool
Hoseok: nerd
Hoseok: i’m in either way :-D
I sat crouched on the shore, poking my index finger into the little holes I saw along the sand. Every now and then, something would bulge and shift beneath the sand’s surface, a sign of life. Smiling, I worked my thumb beneath one of the bumps.
“I thought I said no crabs,” grumbled Hoseok as he licked his popsicle. The thing was already staining his tongue and lips violet.
I hummed as I grabbed a small crab from under the wet sand. “You did say that,” I said with a chuckle as I smoothed the pad of my finger along the crab’s back. I flipped it over in my hand and presented it to Hoseok. “See this plate right here?” I asked, pointing to the smooth shell of the crab’s stomach. “That means it’s a female!”
“I don’t care,” said Hoseok with a heavy sigh.
He leaned back on his palms, three separate leashes hooked around his wrists. The dogs themselves were behaving well enough. The golden retriever was resting his blonde head against his paw, eyebrows shifting as he looked around the beach. The collie panted beneath the unrelenting sun, laying on her stomach with her tongue lolling out the side of her mouth. And the pug simply sat on Hoseok’s lap, eyes shut.
I set the crab back down and crawled over to where Hoseok sat with his legs extended in front of him, taking up an entire blanket by himself. I smiled and collapsed beside his thigh. “Feels good to get out.”
Hoseok sighed and, with his free hand, gave my upper arm a firm smack. “Because you never get out to begin with,” he scolded.
I laughed. “Not all of us can be dog walkers.”
He rolled his eyes. “You don’t have what it takes,” he said with a sigh, biting off a chunk from his melting popsicle. “Endurance, perseverance, patience, understanding-,”
“Are you saying you have all of those things?” I teased, glancing at him over my shoulder. I laughed as he reached a hand out to hit me again. “Sorry!”
As my laughter died down, I felt Hoseok’s gaze boring into my skin and, uneasy, I turned to face him properly. His narrow eyes seized on me, scrutinizing. “You seem weird,” he remarked with a cocked brow.
I inhaled quick, ready to refute him, but as soon as I met his inquiring eyes my breath escaped in a sigh end I rubbed my forehead. “I’m…not myself lately.”
He patted my back with an open palm. “Anything I can do?”
I shook my head. “I don’t think so,” I said. “It’s been building for a few days. Things just…aren’t settling right for some reason. In my head, I mean.”
“Hm…,” began Hoseok, chomping down on his popsicle as he gazed out at the waves. “I wonder if there’s one cause.”
“Probably not,” I said with a soft smile. “Never is just one thing.”
“Yeah.”
“I’m fine,” I said, nodding once as I swept my eyes out across the glittering ocean horizon. “Honestly.”
“Mhm,” said Hoseok as the pug on his lap stretched, letting out a yawn. He rubbed its back, a fond smile on his face. “You know, dogs are pretty clever.”
“Huh?” I asked, turning to face him.
He chuckled and nodded. “Might not look like it right now,” he said with a pointed look at the panting collie. “But they’ve got shit figured out.”
I smiled. “How so?”
“Well…for one thing, they understand the value of a pack. A close circle to watch their backs,” he said, nodding. “They’re loyal, won’t ever intentionally hurt someone they love.”
“I guess.”
“They’re honest.”
I raised my brows, eyeing him. “Hm?”
He was still stroking the sleepy pug’s back, smiling gently. “They don’t know how to be any other way. They don’t know how to pretend.” He lifted only his eyes to meet mine. “When they’re upset, they can’t lie and say they aren’t.”
I stiffened. “Well…they can’t speak.”
He laughed. “That’s not what I mean,” he said, easily leaning back on his palm once more, watching as sugary purple syrup began trailing down his forearm. “They can’t put on a brave face and go about their day like nothing’s wrong. When a dog’s upset, they howl. And they keep howling until they feel better.”
I exhaled slowly. His words weren’t lost on me. I knew well what he was trying to say. And as I took a look at him over my shoulder, I could see from the way his eyes implored me how deeply he wanted me to understand. I gave a smile and nodded.
“Sometimes you gotta just let yourself howl, Joon,” he said, lifting the dripping remains of his popsicle to his mouth and biting it whole. He pocketed the messy stick — much to my dismay — and patted his legs, moving the pug so he could stand. “What do you say I show you someplace cool?”
Me, Hoseok, and three panting dogs enter a pottery store, I thought to myself as Hoseok began calling for the quaint shop’s owner, like bulls in a china shop. The dogs took to sniffing every crevice and corner they could reach, pushing damp noses against delicate pots, pawing at shelf legs, scratching the many ornate rugs on the floor. I watched with a cringe as the golden retriever began jumping beside one of the organized shelves, likely trying to explore the higher levels.
Hoseok corrected the dog with a soft jerk of the leash and continued calling. “Jimin! Park Jimin!”
“Jesus!” called someone from the back of the shop. From the doorway there emerged a young, wide-eyed, flushed guy with a messy apron and knitted brows. He scanned the floor and saw the pups wandering about, immediately wincing. “Jung Hoseok! I told you to stop bringing the dogs!”
Hoseok laughed and shortened the retriever’s leash, wrapping it around his wrist once more. “They’re behaving!”
“Behaving — my ass,” said the young boy, grumbling as he rubbed his forehead. “If any one of them puts their cute little snouts into any of my vases and knocks it over, you’re paying double.”
Hoseok smirked. “Don’t act like you aren’t happy to see them,” he teased.
Jimin opened his eyes with a sigh, brows still furrowed. “I’d be happier if I saw them outside.”
“Heh,” breathed Hoseok, petting the collie on her head. “Anyway, Jimin this is my friend Namjoon.”
Jimin’s eyes slid over to meet mine and he blinked a few times. “That’s a tall friend,” he remarked. He wiped his right hand on his apron a few times and took a half step toward me to shake hands. I took it with a smile. “Nice to meet you,” he said gently.
I nodded. “Likewise.”
“Now you,” said Jimin, pointing a small, accusing finger at Hoseok. “Didn’t I tell you to warn me when you decide to come over?”
Hoseok rolled his eyes. “Do we have to do that among friends?”
“Shut up,” said Jimin, crossing his arms. “I was in the middle of glazing and now my employee’s gotta do it on her own.”
“You got an employee?” asked Hoseok, clearly surprised.
Jimin paused for a moment before smirking. “Mhm,” he said, smug. “And she’s pretty good too. Really interested in pottery.”
Hoseok scoffed. “Don’t tell me…,” he began.
Jimin raised his brows. “Hm?”
“You didn’t hire her because she’s cute, did you?”
Jimin laughed and patted his leg. “Ah, well…it’s not like she’s not cute,” he began, then sighed and shook his head. “Nah. I just…wanted to give her something to do, I guess.”
The words hit me strangely. Was this employee wandering too? Curiosity began to grow in my stomach. “Anyway,” continued Jimin. “How do you two know each other? I’ve been stuck with you since diapers and I’ve never met your tall friend,” he said, eyeing me sidelong with a smirk.
I cleared my throat. “Uh, I had extended family out here, so I visited often as a kid. He lived near my grandma’s house, so we played as kids.”
“He moved here in elementary school. We were in the same year, so we hung out more,” said Hoseok, waving his hands. “Anyway, if you’d gone to our school instead you would’ve known before.”
Jimin laughed. “I also wouldn’t have been bullied,” he joked. I stiffened. Was that something he could be so nonchalant about? “Gotta laugh so you don’t cry, right?” he asked me once he noticed my reaction. He chuckled. “Ah, but what did you want anyway, Hoseok? I can’t really leave my employee by herself too long.”
“Cheeky,” said Hoseok and Jimin only rolled his eyes. “I figured you could show Namjoon how you make pottery.”
“You want a demo?” asked Jimin, dry.
Hoseok nodded. “Mhm.”
“Right now?”
“Yeah.”
“With no warning?”
Hoseok pursed his lips. “I figured a great potter like you could do it on the spot…”
“Ugh,” mumbled Jimin, running a messy hand through his hair. He glanced between me and Hoseok a few times, jaw locked, before sighing. “Alright, let me tell Eunbyul first.”
“Eunbyul?” I asked, and the name fell off my tongue in a way that felt…familiar.
He nodded. “My employee. She can handle it on her own, but I don’t know if she knows that,” he said with a laugh. “Just give me a second.”
Jimin turned on his heel and jogged back through the doorway in the back and, unable to deny my curiosity, I followed behind and peeked my head in. Although the place was big and fairly organized, there were large pieces of machinery blocking my view of Jimin. But nonetheless I could see the back of a girl’s head, slightly shorter than him, waving dark hair restrained with an old newspaper rubber band. She nodded once and glanced down at the tray of freshly glazed cups in her hands. I couldn’t hear her, but Jimin smiled and gave her shoulder a squeeze. She seemed to sigh before turning and walking quickly to the kiln. With her back still facing me, she set the tray down and grabbed cups in both hands, placing them in the kiln. It took her all of thirty seconds to get all two dozen in, and as she turned and strode toward the vat beside the massive kiln, I watched a few stray strands of hair loose themselves from her rubber band.
I glanced down at my wrist, at the hair elastic I’d nearly forgotten about, and briefly considered offering it to her. But she seemed busy as she dipped chalky cups into the glaze, pulling them out shiny. She set them aside one by one, and there was something oddly confident and precise about her motions. Even the way she used the front of her wrist to push the locks of waving hair behind her ear seemed exact, focused.
Strangely, I found myself envying her.
And, as I watched her back, I felt the unmistakable sensation of an under-the-skin kind of itch, the kind you can’t scratch, even if you try your hardest.
Jimin approached and grinned at me. “Checking out my employee?” he teased.
I flushed and turned away quickly. “I didn’t even see her face,” I said, pouting a little.
He laughed and clapped my shoulder. “Let’s do this demo.”
And it hit me as Jimin began setting up the potter’s wheel and clay. Wordlessly, I sat down on the stool beside Hoseok and the dogs and fished around in my pocket for my phone. I yanked it out and pulled up my photos, scanning them. Sure enough, that photo I snapped at Hyejin’s the other day. The girl with the baseball cap. I saw her, sandy skin barely visible beneath the brim of her hat, Somi’s shoulder in the foreground, the girl drowning in clothes several sizes too big.
“That girl…,” I said, thinking aloud as I stared down at the photo.
Jimin turned his eyes to me and smiled. “Hm?”
“I…I’ve been seeing her everywhere lately,” I said, chuckling.
Hoseok sighed and leaned over his lap to get a better look at the shapeless clay Jimin was beginning to mold. “Make it into Justin Trudeau.”
Jimin paused a moment and squared his gaze on Hoseok. “The Canadian prime minister?”
Hoseok nodded. “Yeah. Do it.”
Jimin sighed and shook his head, not even bothering to respond, as I took turns looking at the photo on my phone and at Jimin’s deft hands working the clay carefully. It was impossible to explain, but the way he moved was inexplicably similar to that girl. Perhaps because she was his employee…
But that didn’t seem right.
It was more that they were both endowed with the same nameless quality.
A precision that only comes from—
“Passion,” said Hoseok in a whisper, leaning over to me.
I flushed, my attention now entirely on Jimin as he molded the clay into the vague shape of a flowerpot. “Huh?”
“That’s what makes Jimin so…,” he began, then chuckled. “It’s what makes him so Jimin.”
I was quiet for a moment. “I see,” I said. I might have been nervous that Jimin would overhear us talking about him if it weren’t for the unwavering focus captured in his eye. He probably wouldn’t have even heard an earthquake. “It’s mesmerizing.”
Hoseok chuckled. “Mhm,” he said. “Reminds me of when we were in high school.”
I raised a brow with a smirk. “How so?”
He hummed. “I remember during study hall, you’d always have your laptop out,” he said, laughing. “Mr. Kang hated it.”
I smiled softly. “Yeah. Told him it was for class president duties.”
“But all you did was make beats.”
I was quiet for a moment. Again, I understood what he meant. It was hard not to with a guy like Hoseok. As kind as he was, he was equally clever. He knew how to say something without saying it. I turned to him and we locked eyes. Instead of speaking, I just nodded my head and offered a smile. He returned it, patting my knee.
“Thanks,” I said as Jimin finished up with the main body of the pot. It was gorgeous, an elegant, long shape that tapered toward the bottom. Looked like the kind of pot you’d put a bonsai in.
“For what?” asked Hoseok, feigning ignorance with wide eyes.
I chuckled, squeezing his shoulder. “Just thanks.”
Cubase. God it had been a while since I’d used it on my home computer.
I sat on the floor in front of the coffee table, staring at the project as evening slowly became night. Yoongi still wasn’t back from work, likely putting in long hours finishing up that big collaboration he’d been working on for months. He wouldn’t tell me who it was with, but his excitement told me enough to know it was big.
I rested my cheek in my hand and sighed, tapping my fingertips against the coffee table. The song was nice, kind of slow. It felt a bit…melancholy but still hopeful. I shut my eyes and thought a moment. Could use vocals.
Quietly, I flipped through my lyric book and paused on a single word. Everythingoes. Written sloppily in the margins of a song I’d never finished. I cocked a brow. Back when I was younger, going to therapy, the doctor had told me something to that effect. Everything goes. Every moment, every pain, every trauma. I sat up straighter. Something about it rolled nicely, both in English and Korean. The lyrics beside it were meant to go with it. Perhaps if I recorded myself with Yoongi’s mic…
I changed a few things around, added some lines where I felt the words weren’t enough, and stewed over it for a long moment.
Everything has to hurt.
That line stood out to me. Silently, I padded into Yoongi’s room and grabbed the mic he kept hidden in the second drawer of his work table. I’d take the scolding later. I fell in a heap once more before my laptop and plugged in the mic. After a few tests, I cleared my throat and began recording the rap. If nothing else, I could find someone else to sing the chorus.
“Like morning comes after night, if summer comes after spring,” I began, and didn’t stop, didn’t stumble. “And every day I stay, because people and pain all die eventually.” I kept going, and even though I was rusty, I could feel some power in it. In the words. “Pray that this wind will pass like all winds do.”
I stopped to catch my breath, pausing the song and pulling the headphones off my ears with a sigh. I patted my cheeks a little, shook my head, and opened my eyes slowly.
But when I looked around, I saw something that hadn’t been there before. More specifically, a darkly clad someone standing with crossed arms beside the arm of the couch. I screamed before I could stop myself as Yoongi crossed the living room floor and sat on the couch beside my head, hunching over his knees to inspect my project with squinted eyes.
“Sounded good,” he said with a nod. I swallowed hard. Without looking at me, he continued. “Can I hear the beat?”
“Ah, uh, it’s still really rough and-,”
He turned to face me with one cocked brow. “Can I hear it?”
I hinged and unhinged my jaw a few times, but he was scanning me and I couldn’t stall long. I clamped my mouth shut and cleared my throat. “Um…yeah, sure.”
I unplugged the headphones and played what I had from the start. “I…I wanna add vocals here,” I said as the song began. “Something kind of…like a chant. Repeating, I think. Like a mantra.”
“Mm,” said Yoongi with a nod, brow low as he listened. I’d have liked if he didn’t listen quite so intently.
“Um…and then here I think I want the piano to get a little quieter.”
“Mhm.”
I nodded and decided to stay silent. He wasn’t giving me any feedback anyway, just listening. Instead, I just sat there like a kid, awaiting my parent to tell me if I did well or not. The song closed and I glanced over my shoulder at Yoongi who by then had his chin seized between his two palms, almost like he was praying.
“So…?” I hedged, eyeing him.
He nodded. “Really good.”
My eyes went wide and I stared at him like I was seeing him for the first time in the dark living room. I could just barely see his lips tilting in a bare smile. “R-Really?”
“I wouldn’t lie,” he said, leaning back with a nod. “Why haven’t you shared your work with me before?”
I stiffened. “Um…well, when we met you were already almost graduated with your degree, and I was just this young kid following you around. I…kinda figured someone like you wouldn’t want to listen to my shit.”
He cocked a brow. “It’s not shit though.”
“I just…I mean, you were a pro from the start, you know? Just…super confident from the beginning. And by the time I started to get really serious about it, you were already working for the label and I was getting recruited by a contract company,” I said, shaking my head. “I figured that alone was enough to show the difference in our leagues.”
“League?” asked Yoongi, brow furrowed.
I sighed. “I dunno. You’re…you’ve always been great. And I’m just…a sound engineer, really.”
Yoongi shook his head. “I’m telling you this because I mean it, alright?” he asked, crossing his arms. “If you got in with the right label, you’d do well.”
I sat up straighter, twisting to look at him properly. But instead, he was staring at my project, still smiling just barely. “Huh?”
“I’m not just saying that,” he said, nodding. “You could be a really successful producer.”
I was about to respond, perhaps pick his brain, perhaps thank him, but my phone began buzzing on the table and I jumped at the sound. Quickly I grabbed it, ready to silence the phone and return the call later. But I saw the name on the screen and paused. Hani. And at this hour…
Yoongi patted my shoulder. “Take the call,” he said, chuckling. “I know you don’t have a choice.”
I turned to stop him, but he was already striding towards his room. He didn’t even mention me borrowing his mic…
Sighing, I slid the phone open and took the call. “Hey…,” I said, and even I could hear that my voice was glum.
“Hey, uh…,” she said, her tone fragile.
I rubbed my temples. “What’s up?”
“It’s…it’s just Sooyoung. The divorce is almost final and they’re talking about custody and she’s kinda caught in, like, the crossfire or whatever. I’m worried,” she said, speaking too fast for me to keep up with.
“Have you talked to her?”
She sighed. “No, she’s not taking my calls. My parents texted me to look out for her, but she hasn’t even seen my texts,” she said. “I’m worried.”
“I understand,” I said gently. “Maybe go home for a few days and spend time with her, you know? Maybe she needs you there.”
“I know I’m just…I guess I’m kinda scared, you know? Like to go to my childhood home and see everything changing…it’s weird,” she said. “God, can I just come over tonight? Like movies or something?”
I stiffened. “Ah…jeez, Hani. I’m…I’m not so sure that’s a good idea.”
“I know, I know. Joon, I’m so sorry. It’s just…I really don’t wanna be alone right now,” she said, voice breaking.
I felt my chest pinch a little. “Hani, why don’t you go home then?”
She sighed. “I told you-,”
“But if you can’t be alone, the best place is home,” I said, staring at my half-finished song. The one that would surely stay half-finished if she came over.
“I think it would be too hard.”
“Then what about your friends? Joohee lives close by anyway,” I said, desperate.
“Joon…,” she began, letting the word die in the air.
I sighed. “It’s not good for me, Hani. I wish you’d respect that.”
“I know. It’s selfish, and I know that. But…I just need to be with you right now, you know?”
“Don’t say that,” I said, pinching my eyes shut. But, to my surprise, my heart didn’t race like it used to. Instead, only annoyance.
“I mean it-,”
“Hani!” I shouted, slamming a hand on the table. I saw there on my wrist that hair elastic. What was it about that thing? “I’ve told you so many times, haven’t I? I’ve told you it’s not healthy!”
“Don’t yell!”
I shook my head, heart pounding now for an entirely different reason. “I’m not yelling,” I said, leveling my tone. “I…Hani, do you have any idea what it’s been like?”
She was quiet. “I…”
“Do you have any idea how hard it was? When you told me on graduation night. The years after. How you knew I knew you were still messing around on me,” I pinched my nose bridge. “I promised myself I wouldn’t make you feel guilty for it. That you yourself felt bad enough. That that would be enough for me too.”
“Joon…”
“But you can’t keep hurting people and expect them to give you the love you need,” I said. “You can’t keep putting me through the pain of reliving everything. It’s not fair.”
She said nothing. For a long time. But I heard the ambient sound of life on the other side of the phone, and I knew she was still there. Still listening, waiting for me to continue. But I didn’t have it in me. I’d said it. I’d finally howled.
“I…I don’t know what to say, Joon,” she said finally.
I nodded. “Me either.”
“I…can’t we meet up and talk this out in person?”
I exhaled, long and slow, and shook my head, eyes falling to the hair elastic on mu wrist. “No, Hani.”
She sighed. “Namjoon…”
“Go home, okay? Do it for Sooyoung,” I said before ending the call and tossing my phone onto the couch behind me.
Quietly, determined, I pulled my headphones back up around my ears, straightened my sweatshirt, and got back to work on the song.
“Namjoon!” someone called as I opened my eyes.
I didn’t even have a chance to react, because the girl who’d called for me had already wrapped her arms around my waist, burying her head in my shirt. It was familiar, this scene. Looking down at the top of a strange girl’s head in the middle of the darkness. Feeling her arms tighten around me. I might have resisted, might have pulled away, if I didn’t feel that same itch beneath my skin as I had watching that employee earlier today.
“Eun…Eunbyul?” I said, testing the name in my mouth.
She stiffened and pulled away, and once our eyes met the memories returned. Everything. Unwillingly, tears welled in my eyes and everything made sense. That wistfulness I’d been feeling all day, the sense of profound melancholia. After leaving the dream the night before, being so close, seeing something so painful, and having not even a spare second to console her…
Instead of saying anything, I swept her up in my arms again and let my head fall into the crook of her neck. She held tight too, like I might slip away if she didn’t keep her grip strong. She smelled like strawberry shampoo and the faint, barely-there scent of clay.
She breathed a shaky exhale and nodded against me. “I’m so fucking happy to see you,” she said softly.
I nodded, unable to summon words for a moment. “I…I saw you again today. At the pottery place.”
She nodded. “I saw you too. Walking away with Jimin.”
“I wish I would have gotten a good look at you,” I said.
“Me too…”
“I’m sorry.”
“Me too.”
We stayed that way, embracing, for a moment that felt endless. Eunbyul was the first to break away, adjusting her glasses as she did. She sniffled a little, rubbing beneath her nose, and averted her eyes. Neither of us said anything, but it was clear something had shifted between us. Our relationship…whatever it was…was changing.
“Let’s…let’s do something fun tonight,” I said with a nod.
She smiled softly, pushing her hair from her face. She nodded. “I’d like that.”
Gently, I took her hand and shut my eyes. I tried to remember every detail of the place, every lamppost and vendor’s booth. I tried to conjure the cobbled walkways, the ferris wheel, the lanterns strung up in rows overhead. And when I opened my eyes, it was sunset and we were there.
“An amusement park?” she asked, chuckling. “And…wait, is this in Sangdo-dong?” she asked.
I nodded. “You know it?”
She stared, mystified and wide-eyed, at the park splayed out before her. “Um…yeah, actually. I think I mentioned it before, but…something kind of scary happened to me when I was young. It was pretty nearby here.”
I stiffened. “Shit, I can take us somewhere else-,”
She turned to me and smiled, shaking her head. “Don’t,” she said. “I wanna go on some rides.”
I blinked down at her, at the big sleep shirt with shorts just barely peeking out, at the bed hair, at the flush in her cheeks. And I felt myself flush too. I cleared my throat and began strolling toward one of the coasters.
“Do, uh…do you think the rides will work?” I asked.
She hummed. “I dunno. You’ve never tried?”
I shook my head. “I…also had something scary happen when I was a kid. Here at the amusement park. So I haven’t been back.”
“Oh,” she said, pausing in the walkway. “We can go someplace else.”
I smiled and rubbed circles into her hand. “No, it’s fine. It’s just…the only amusement park I could remember. And I remember it pretty vividly.”
She nodded. “Alright.”
“Here, let’s go on this one,” I said, pointing to the swinging pirate ship.
Her eyes glittered in the sunset as she stared at it. “Whoa,” she said, glancing around. “Who’s gonna operate it?”
I paused a moment and pursed my lips. “You sit down first and I’ll push a button or something.”
“Push a button?” she repeated, laughing.
I rolled my eyes and gave her shoulder a shove with mine. “Maybe two buttons,” I said, shrugging. I released her hand she gestured for her to go ahead onto the ride.
She waved at me over her shoulder and took a seat at the farthest row, the one right by the back of the ship. She bounced a little as she waited for me, smiling in my direction as I examined the control panel. Perhaps because I’d never seen it, I couldn’t quite imagine what it would look like and in its place was just a blank metal podium.
I sighed and rubbed my chin. “I mean…,” I began, talking to myself, “if it’s a dream, I can make the rules, right?”
I shut my eyes and imagined a big red button on the podium, one that would give the start a delay so I could take my seat with Eunbyul. As I opened my eyes, there it was and with a smile I pounded it. Told you, I thought, just one button. I heard the machine whirring up and sprinted as fast as I could toward the entrance of the ship. I bumped my shin on the way down the aisle and Eunbyul suppressed a laugh with her hand. Luckily, just as the thing lurched to life, I fell into the spot beside her with a heavy sigh.
“You ready?” I asked, smiling.
She laughed and nodded. “Been ready.”
I rolled my eyes as the ride began to swing like a pendulum, gradually increasing in speed and height. Soon, we were rocking back and forth, sent high into the air and then hovering, weightless, for a fraction of a second before plummeting back down to earth. Beside me, Eunbyul released a joyful scream, throwing her arms in the air as we swung up and down, back and forth. The wind whipped her hair around, and on each descent she had to squeeze her eyes nearly shut. She laughed as we swung and swung. If she’d let me, I’d liked to have kept sitting there forever, watching her smile and laugh as the pirate ship lurched.
But my brain seemed to know approximately how long a ride should be, and before too long, the ride slowed to a steady stop. Eunbyul, with her hair now windswept and waving and her eyes alight, turned to me with the brightest smile.
“That was so fun,” she said, laughing.
It was the first time I’d seen her with such unbridled happiness, an easy joy in her features. And she was beautiful. I wanted her to stay that way, stay smiling, stay messy, stay joyful.
I smiled. “What next?” I asked.
The two of us traveled through what I remembered of the park. It had been a long time since I’d seen the place, but it seemed the memory was nearly imprinted. After all, it was the last place I’d seen with Dad. I ambled easily by Eunbyul’s side as she explored my memories, and we stopped at nearly every ride. The log ride, the coaster that nearly blew out my eardrums, the haunted house sans actors to play the ghosts.
“Let’s go on that,” she said, pointing at the ferris wheel as it sat juxtaposed against the forever sunset.
I raised my brows. “Oh, sure.”
She turned to me and smiled. “Hey, Namjoon?” she asked, almost shy.
“Hm?”
“Thank you for…you know, taking me here,” she said, laughing lightly. “Lately, I’ve been feeling a little better and I think it’s because I’ve been able to spend time with you.”
“Eunbyul-,”
“Ugh, let’s go before I get sentimental,” she said, waving her hands with a pinched expression. I laughed as she led the way to the ferris wheel.
Once I’d pressed the identical red button and scrambled to join Eunbyul in the closed ferris wheel box, the two of us fell into a comfortable, easy silence. She gazed out the window as the blurry horizon that my mind couldn’t conjure, the place where all the colors blended together. And I watched her, silhouetted against the violent yellow sun as it descended into reds and oranges.
“So…,” I began, watching her keenly. “How do you know that pottery guy?”
She paused for a moment before pursing her lips and offering a shrug. “I met him recently. I was spying on him through the window.”
“Spying?”
She nodded. “Because it looks so nice when he throws pottery.”
I smiled softly. “It was really mesmerizing.”
She turned to me with a smile. “He’s a nice guy,” she said. “I think he believes in me too much.”
I shook my head. “I saw you working today, Eunbyul. You were…really competent. It was like watching Jimin make pottery. I couldn’t look away.”
Her skin went a little red in the cheeks and she cleared her throat, smoothing her palms over her kneecaps. “Well…”
“You’re better than you think you are.”
She sighed, letting her gaze fall. “Anyway, how do you know him?” she asked, letting my eyes again.
I smiled. “My friend Hoseok took me by today. He was trying to…embolden me, I guess. Get me back into my groove.”
“Your groove has been off?” she asked, brows raised.
I nodded. “For a while. I’m…stifled. In a lot of ways.”
She nodded. “And did it help? Seeing Jimin?”
I smiled softly, remembering that song. “Yeah. I…I made a song. For myself. Something I believe in.”
She smiled at me and reached out across the small space between our legs to pat my knee. “Namjoon! That’s amazing,” she said, chuckling. “That Jimin. He’s good, I’ll give him that.” She paused and glanced at me. “Let me hear the song sometime, okay? When we finally meet in real life.”
I swallowed hard and rubbed my neck. Nervous as I was for her to hear it, the offer was irresistible. I nodded. “And…just Joon is fine.”
She stared at me, blinking, before she chuckles breathily and nodded. “Ah! O-Okay. Then, uh…call me Byul, okay?”
“Byul…”
She went red and cleared her throat, laughing again. “God, it’s embarrassing to hear you say it,” she said.
I smiled. “Do a lot of people call you that?”
“No,” she said softly, watching her hands as the ferris wheel rolled lazily toward the top.
“Does that bookstore guy call you Byul?” I asked, unable to stop myself.
She stiffened. “Who?” she asked, then snapped her fingers. “Ah, Jin?”
I shrugged, pouting. “I dunno. The guy who was flirting with you at the bookstore.”
She laughed. “He wasn’t flirting, just…bored,” she said with a nod. “God, I guess…I guess I have a crush on him?” she said, but the way she furrowed her brow made it seem like she was unsure. “But these days, it feels a little different. Like…maybe I don’t.”
I smiled, just a little relieved, and nodded. “I feel the same way with my ex.” Eunbyul’s eyes snapped up to meet mine, wide and brown. “Um…she called tonight. Hani.”
She inhaled as if to speak, but only let it go and nodded. “Oh.”
“I told her she can’t come over anymore.”
I watched her expression change, like she was relieved too, and she exhaled slow. “Good job,” she said, meeting my eyes again with a smile. “That must have been hard.”
I shook my head. “It’s like you said. Like…the way I feel about her is different now. Even in real life.”
“Wonder why,” she said idly as she glanced out the window at the empty park below.
I felt my heart thundering in my chest and swallowed hard. Say it, Namjoon, I thought. Say it now or regret not saying it forever. “I can…think of a few reasons,” I said slowly, watching her for any sign to stop.
She stiffened a little and turned to me with wide eyes. “Huh?” she asked. Surprised, but not disgusted.
Slowly, I leaned across the small space between us so that our faces were close. “Byul, I…,” I began, chuckling as the nerves made my words catch in my throat. “Sorry, nervous,” I said, unable to stop myself from telling her the truth.
She nodded and gently took my hand. “It’s okay,” she said.
I took a steadying breath and met her warm, dark eyes. “I think I have feelings for you.”
She was still for a moment, still holding my hand, before slowly she let her eyes drop and her fingers slipped between mine. It was small, but the gesture felt intimate. And the space between us was charged, trapped in this small ferris wheel box. I knew it was stupid, that there was no way it could work. I knew it would be nearly impossible to meet her in real life if I couldn’t remember these dreams, and I knew that even meeting, even seeing her properly, might not be enough to make me remember. I knew it all. I knew it was stupid, and that this moment was finite and that in the morning I’d forget it ever happened.
But right then, I needed to kiss her.
And so I tipped my chin just enough for our lips to touch. It wasn’t the sort of kiss you see in movies. Passionate and frantic and desperate, hands clawing at each other, panting. No, it was…softer. Gentler. She jumped a little at the contact, but I watched with half-open eyes as she shut her own eyes and leaned into me, her fingers still laced in mine. Tenderly, I lifted a hand to rest along the line of her jaw, touching her just barely. I felt her tilt her head to the side and took the initiative to deepen the kiss, just enough. Smooth and slow, like butter melting in a pot. Smooth and slow.
I pulled away first, hand still holding her jaw, her hair fluttering against my knuckles, and stared at her with heavy-lidded eyes. “Sorry,” I said in a whisper. Everything felt hot, so hot I thought I might pass out if it weren’t a dream.
She shook her head and tightened her grip on my hand. “Don’t apologize.”
“I know it’s really impossible, but…,” I began, but stopped as I felt the pull once more in my chest. “Fuck,” I breathed, resting my forehead against hers.
“I know,” she said with a nod, shutting her eyes with a shaky exhale. “We…we’ll meet. We have to meet, okay?” she said.
I nodded against her forehead and shut my own eyes. Even though I knew it might be a lie, nonetheless I responded sincerely. “We will.”
“It’ll be okay.”
“You’re right.”
She nodded and sighed. “I’ll see you tomorrow night, Joon.”
“See you tomorrow, Byul.”
And in an instant, she slipped away.
#namjoon fanfiction#namjoon fanfic#namjoon fluff#namjoon angst#namjoon#kim namjoon#namjoon series#namjoon reaction#bts namjoon#bts fanfic#bts fanfiction#bts fluff#bts angst#bts reactions#bts imagines#bts series#bts au fanfic#bts
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AUGH i could make a million posts abt this fhsfkjdfs i took some notes on what i did remember in between everything ill collect those now
jimmy had striped socks on and it was STUPIDLy endearing...............i love u they were SO peppy and jaunty!!! their HOPS...their DANCING...their VIBES..........SMORCH
they also have a sticker of themself on their keyboard stand! queen of self esteem
mcbc just went "JIMMY!!!!! :D" in the middle of a good sax solo I think and wandered over to admire them, and to hold his mic off to the side of their sax since they already have a sax mic but he had to make REAL sure you could appreciate their skills.... they also did the 360 hug for hey homies it was VERY cute im Bad Up To My Nonsense appawently
they DID fight a demonic minion and the Poodle People and jimmy straight up irish whipped mcbc into a bunch of dog people THANKS babe!!!!!! they were also throwing towels after the Weird Dogs when they were vanquished they’re doing their FUCKING best
mcbc leapt off the stage during that fight for reasons incomprehensible to me, perhaps the panache of it all, or the adrenaline, and jimmy had to come over and help him back up onstage goofy........IDIOTS......
while mcbc was hanging out with the crowd, someone asked if he could give this high five to Jimmy and then high fives him, and jimmy came closer and accepted the high five but also knelt down to high five her themself................ I'm soft, i AM soft, let it never be said i wasnt soft
THEY PLAYED YOUR LOVE IT'S FINALLY RICKY'S BIRTHDAY AGAIN...... my sibling bruised my arm when we realized what they were building to...mcbc was like “aint he cute!!!” afterwards and later had a moment of going “hey so why is ricky the best drummer on the planet actually” AWH...
"i stand up to bullies every day. especially you, commander" - ricky, canonically
mcbc corpsed a LOT he had a great time! we had a few Moments bc I was in the front row and he was very smiley and when I got too excited and had to giggle and cover my face he noticed and was very cool about it... love him thank u autistic rights
crashes cousin smash/Phil Din/I BELIEVE chainsaw was filling in for him tonight as he has been on this tour! jimmy kept pointing at him and nodding impressedly during the basslines esp the ICONIC super show one it was sweet. also if you havent listened to the super show theme in a bit go listen to it and pay attention to the bassline because it fucks
he brought a message from crash, also, and it was just Groove Is In The Heart and it was a treat. thanks chainsaw probably and thank you crash i miss you and love u Mwa
JIMMY DID THE SLIDE WHISTLE NOISES FOR GROOVE IS IN THE HEART ACTUALLY HER RANGE...........AUGH im gonna pass out im so in l*ve
they got TWO of the pizza inflatables back on stage before The CHild Throwing and jimmy got to hold both of them for a bit and they were just engulfed by pizza im gonna blow up i love them so fucking much
(mcbc voice) george lucas pizza body :\
(jimmy singing back) george lucas pizza body~
mcbc was discussing with the gal theyd called onstage for the Throwing Of The Children (who had already been taken onstage and gotten sharpie on her face as the opening band chose her as their new leader and was thus a little too freaked out for this, which mcbc was very kind about and very crossly told her parents telling her to just do it to Back Off before letting her go back and bringing up someone else) and asked if she'd like to go first or second and made EXPLICITLY clear that she will have a choice in this matter! she declined to go first and then mcbc nods, turns to the boy who will also be crowdsurfing, and very flatly tells him he does not have a choice GEE.....THANKS, /DAD/
(mcbc voice) i am going to throw you, onto that piece of pizza.
(boy voice) -
(boy voice) 0_0?
(mcbc voice) AND THE CROWD IS GOING TO CATCH YOU
THEY PLAYED LOOK AT ME IM A WINNER /AND/ DOIN SCIENCE!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!! AND THE EXTENDED VERSION OF SHOWTIME THAT MAKES ME FEEL LIKE I COULD DO ANYTHING GGGHGHGH LOVE THAT FOR THEM
THEY ALSO PLAYED CHEMICAL BOMB IN 2019 WHICH I STILL CANT FUCKING BELIEVE HAPPENED GHGKJFGUUUUUU.......jimmy was very quietly doing the “maaaaayyyyybeee”s after the song was over and im just *swoons softly* i AM soft god dont look at me. god. god i love this fucking stupid band so much
eaglebones was VERY cheeky tonight! Mischievous! he kept going >:) and sticking his tongue out and he was having fun im glad i love u bastard fool
this WAS foolish too bc mcbc helped eaglebones hit a beach ball using his guitar as a bat twice and he almost knocked one of the lights down doing it fhdsjkds he was like AAAAYUUUUGHHH after it happened GOOFY. GOOFASS. FIVE LAWSUITS WALKING
at one point I looked away for five seconds and looked back and saw mcbc tumbling out of the audience back in front of the stage completely on his back like a pill bug, absolute madman
mcbc was actually talking abt how they used to have a trampoline onstage for pool party so the kids could party on it but THEN a legal happened -_- *this was a joke dont worry they have done MUCH more wild stuff than that*
“america, land of lawsuits :(”- mcbc, 2019
everyone in this band (mcbc don't look) is so FUCKING talented its bonkers HONESTLY LIKE MCBC TOO TRULY he isnt TALENTED talented but he just like....GOES for it and he is so weird and dramatic and hammy its genuinely a big inspiration but everyone else in this band is so fucking good at what they do i LOVE that for them
lichrally as soon as the concert was over and they started taking the stage down i started crying fhdkjds my mom and sib came back from the merch tables and were like HUH?!?!?!?!?! and i had to be cool about it but like I WAS JUST...BAWLING mom was all “you REALLY like seeing them huh???” and i was like “*autistically* y-yea :’|”
IT WAS..........WONDERFUL. I.....................................................LOVE BAND
#WILL TO LIVE: RESTORED#bat tag#long post -#its been over a decade since they last played in idaho and like#moving from california i really really thought i was never gonna see them again so it was. yknow. a lot. a lot to feel!#I LOVE THEM I REALLY FUCKING DO........................NNOT TO BE CRINGE OR ANYTHING BUT IM BIG...ENAMORED#IM REALLY HAPPY ABOUT IT. IM GLAD. IT WAS GOOD I HAD FUN
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get madder :^)
hey yall remember that post where i gave a 1-or-2 sentence comment about each fanart that got featured in the community update? many people promptly took their panties and corkscrewed them directly up their very touchy buttholes, so i thought it'd be fun to do a follow-up :^)
>everyone who just said "lol bad post u suck ur opinion SUX"
it's my opinion lol deal w it
>it’s kinda cute how you think we would care about this / nobody cares
clearly u do bc ur mad fam!!! hahaha rekd got u!!1!
>perhaps… perhaps art is subjective and they wanted to make some community members happy by featuring them?
they couldve picked a little better was my only point
>"It’s people like this who give new artists anxiety for posting stuff online" / everything about how mean i am bc it will make newb artists feel nerbous :'(
hey guess what! it's the internet where literally everyone can see and say whatever they want. that's the risk ya fuckin take when u post online :^) waahhh
>"It’s called a personal art style"
its common knowledge by now but "its muh style" is not an excuse and yeah its subjective but also sometimes aspects of a pic are just bad
>"how does desnik only get a 5/10 lmao. Amazing shading, a super unique and difficult perspective that brings life to the whole piece? Ye nah that’s shit, apparently."
i said the shading (painting) was pretty good, and they lose points bc "bringing it to life" with a weird pose only works if the anatomy and perspective (which i specified) isnt so off that it takes away from the entire piece pretty significantly, which imo it does. also that pose isnt unique i can find u 10 pics of furries in that exact pose on like the front page of furaffinity or wherever. also i didnt say it was shit LOL
>"“this is anime uwu garbage” is not criticism OP"
fuck yeah it is, you ever been to the front page of deviantart? i assumed the implied "stop using super stylized shitty anime pics as a reference bc ur overall "style" is severely and obviously suffering for it" was kinda evident but i guess not
>"why the fuck do people get so butthurt when someone says their art is bad"
dude THANK you i mean i was expecting pretty severe backlash but i was as least expecting more creativity than literally just "bad post op" 20 times. tho i DID see enough to make this post i guess? this blog is fun but like in a painful way
> “not to be rude to the featured artists, good on them” pick a tone and stick with it
sorry man i really just do have a rude-sounding speaking (,,typing) voice and i dont mean any bad feelings towards these artists, my literal only point is that that one pic has some problems and maybe staff had some better pics to spotlight instead (and i don't even mean that for all of them. top, middle, and bottom left were all good choices and so was desnik's tbh. but i figured id ""review"" them too cuz they were there) i usually even pointed out something i liked about it? but i gotta move fast here cmon 100 character limit
>"dude… do you even know what a sketch is? because that’s in no way a sketch"
what do YOU define as a sketch? i guess the snapper one could also be lineart but its in 2 midtones (which people do when theyre "sketching" out values) and they used a messy brush so my mind went to sketch. and the coatl one looks like they did it really fast and slapped some flat colors on it. actually my point was literally that it looks like they did it fast, like a sketch rather than a lineart
>"at least put in some effort in writing a couple of sentences on each drawing on what, why, and how to improve the drawings. Seeing that some of the art is clearly from amateur artists, some words of advice would at least be helpful here."
yeah u right they definitely deserve better. but i was going fast cuz i just have an affinity for short snappy reviews i guess. like i tried to do cliffnotes, just "this part is good but this part is bad" and then a meaningless number score cuz i aint even addressing this to them, i posted it to a drama blog to complain about staff basically
>the nocturne guy who wrote a lot
alright cool. you totally have gotten a lot better. i never meant to discourage you for drawing in the first place. incidentally i said u had potential bc u were obviously a new artist, but like u were OBVIOUSLY a new artist with a loose understanding of depth and shading and stuff, and again this is a front page spotlight yadda yadda. ill fuckin hit u with a review right now:
you clearly understand shading and anatomy way better, and that coatl actually looks pretty fuckin good. the lineart is more consistent, it's framed way better, the proportions are WAY better, and it's really clean and stylized. the shading is infinitely more convincingly shiny and reflective. from here, imo you could benefit from going further with shading (darker, more dynamic, leaving little to no flat spaces like the crest fluff and tongue), and maybe polishing the lineart a little more too, like coloring/highlighting it and really pushing/polishing the linewidth (there are tutorials for that). overall that coatl is v cute, keep on pushing poses & shading
>"i bet OPs art sucks ass"
fIT e ME IrL
anyway thanks 4 reading my fucking essay and i'm super high. if you read al lof this then shame on you
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heey first of i just wanted to say that you're like literally my favorite blog no joke i love love your writing like i cannot stop smiling whenever im reading your stuff and as your friends to lovers thingy is one of my favorites i was wondering if you could do one with taehyung?? thaanks 💙
find: jin | jimin | namjoon | jungkook | yoongi
you and taehyung have always been messes,,,,but cute messes together
you technically became friends in detention ,,,,,,
taehyung had been sitting at the back of the classroom with silly string all over his hair and shirt ,,,, he’d brought a can to school and accidentally sprayed himself and the gym teacher
and you,,,,well you had gotten into an argument that had ended in a food fight and there was probably still some cold cheese from a pizza that was flung at you in your hair
but,,,,,,with mutual understanding you and taehyung had just grinned and gone “that’s what you’re in here for? cool!”
the teacher who was supposed to be guarding you and making sure you were doing homework had flaked in the middle to go gossip in the hall so you and taehyung had moved closer discussing if it would be good to make a break for it or not
you thought maybe using the silly string as a distraction could work but also taehyung wasn’t looking to get expelled so you’d decided instead that peeking out the door till the teachers backs were both turned you two would dash down the hall for freedom
and you did,,,,,,,,you were just a tad slower and taehyung had grabbed your hand and pulled you along through the doors as the sound of the teacher drowned out behind you
after that,,,,you two became inseparable
and sure it had a lot to do with you both loving practical jokes and being free-spirited but it also had to do with just,,,,,how you got each other without words
just looks and smiles and inside jokes,,,, and you never making fun of taehyung in anyway because no matter how people saw him
taehyun is smart and caring and you knew that,,,just like he knew that about you
and growing up you guys got out of pranks and skipping class and just became more into going to live concerts late at night and staying up past 4 am to set of fireworks on the beach with other friends you’d made as you got older
and ,,,, it stayed nice and carefree but you were also adults now so,,,,you had to be there for each other not just for laughs but for serious things as well
and one day taehyung confides that he’d like to be a singer and you support him one hundred percent but before an audition he decides he wants to dye his hair to stand out
“what color are you thinking?”
“,,,,,,,you’re going to laugh but,,,,,,,orange”
you look at taehyung like are you being serious but you can see the twinkle in his eye and you’re like ok orange it is let’s make you into a walking flaming dorito
and it was ur first time,,,,bleaching and dying someones hair,,,,but taehyung for some reason trusted you
even though you were the two kids who thought itd be smart to throw water balloons over a huge spiked fence in highschool ,,,,, but hey friends trust friends,,,,,,,,right?
and so with paper towels everywhere and you standing behind taehyung in your tiny bathroom,,,you managed to get him in an old t-shirt with gloves on your hands and spreading bleach over his hair
and every minute or so he’d whine that it stings and you’d be like suck it up kim we have another half your head to go
and taehyung would mumble that you should at least try to distract him and you would go do u want me to focus so i dont get bleach in ur eye or what
taehyung: point taken
and when you’d finally got him blonde,,,you could start on getting him orange
and tbh taehyung was like “you should dye your hair too,,,let’s be matching!” and you were like if i ever am feeling the baby carrot hair look ill tell u and taehyung rolls his eyes and ur like hey i can see u in the mirror dude
and he sticks his tongue out and ur like im holding the life of ur scalp in my hands do not test me
,,,,,but when you were done,,,,, taehyung closing the door to wait before taking a shower you’d spread out on your couch tired of standing
and half an hour later your friend walked out, after you hear the dryer turn of,,,,,,his orange hair as bright as possible,,,,,and you cannot help it
walking over and ruffling your hands through his hair
smiling and going “i did a good job,,,,its so cute!!” and somehow you cant stop yourself from adding “your hair is so soft too,,,,”
and taehyung,,, letting you run your hands through his hair,,,,brings his fingers up to wrap around your wrist and he gently pulls them so you look at him
and,,,,,,even with a hair color not many can pull off,,,,,,you see how it falls into taehyungs eyes
makes your friends naturally gorgeous skin shine,,,,,,eyes slightly hooded and lips parted
and you are used to being this close to taehyung,,,,but in the quiet moment in your living room with his body so close to yours you can feel the warmth of his presence
your heart cant calm down
and taehyung seems to feel it too,,,,,,u didn’t know just dying someones hair could mean getting so intimate but thinking on it
the whole thing,,,,,seemed like such a couple thing to do,,,,the standing behind taehyung and fixing the back of his shirt so it wont get dirty,,,, wiping sweat from his forehead and stray dye,,,,giggling and joking and having taehyung threaten to tickle you if anything
like sure friends could do all of this too,,,,,but taehyungs grip on you ,,,, his eyes,,,,,,, something now was different
and just one more inch and you can feel his cheek brush yours,,,, the long bangs tickling you and then his lips,,,,,
settle just at the corner of your mouth,,, like the almighty funny and carefree taehyung is nervous to kiss his bestfriend on the lips
and when you pull back the two of you are silent but taehyung walks you back against the sofa and it’s like,,,,natural for you two to fall back in each others arms
your hand coming up again to run through his hair and taehyung whispers
“i think we’ve always been a couple,,,,neither of us just said anything,,,”
you nod,,, pressing a bit closer and going “but to be a singer,,, we’re gonna have to keep pretending it’s just friends”
taehyung leans down pressing his forehead to yours and grinning “well we’ve convinced everyone thats just what it is but for now - we’re alone and im going to kiss you some more”
“ok carrotcake kim”
“don’t spoil the moment”
#bts scenario#bangtan scenario#taehyung scenario#v scenarios#member: v#sfw#bangtan scenarios#bts imagines#Bangtan imagines#bts au#bangtan au#taehyung au#taehyung imagine#bangtan#taehyung#kim taehyung scenario#v imagines#ive had this idea for a while actually 0:
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Everybody Needs A Nervy B Now And Then
or
Bitch In A Uniform
On the verge of turning 18, grown-up-to-be James sets his sights on the new girl at school, “gorgeous sex-god” Lily, bass player for the Stiff Dylans. Unfortunately Lily appears to already be dating James’ evil archrival: the greasy and bitter Snape. With his ridiculously named cat Sir Jeremy and his band of brothers, the Ace Gang, by his side, James sets his mad schemes in motion to nab a snogtastic girlfriend and have the best birthday party ever.
it’s here !!!! its here despite my computer shitting itself and drawing a total blank on a title and not being able to leave it alone its HERE we MADE IT
my eternal love to @alrightevans and also @alrightpotter @prongsyouignoramus and @gxldentrio
AO3
James Potter to Ace Gang: cnt believe u wankers fucking abandoned me
Remus Lupin: james we were RIGHT THERE
James Potter: NOT DRESSED AS HORS D’OEVRES
Sirius Black: it’s spelled hors d’oeuvres
James Potter: i think you’ll find its spelled ‘betrayal’
James Potter: why did you all bail???????????????
Peter Pettigrew: Mum wouldn’t let me go as a cocktail sausage, seeing as she’s veggo and all
Sirius Black: jam you KNO yellow washes me out idk what you were thinking trying to make me be a cheese and pineapple stick
Remus Lupin: i’ll square idk how the fuck i was supposed to be a vol-au-vent
James Potter changed the group name to Betrayal Gang.
Sirius Black changed James Potter’s nickname to olive boi.
-
Sirius Black to James Potter: u should have been at mine 2 minutes ago
Sirius Black: wher r u
James Potter: coming
James Potter: was talking to mum and dad abt my party
Sirius Black: howd it go
James Potter: :///////:
Sirius Black: double ended :/
James Potter: yeah.
-
Sirius Black to Ace Gang: just saw snape on the way to bio. god hes so wet up close
James Potter: wearer of the wettest haircut known to humanity thy name is snape
Peter Pettigrew: Omg i kno i saw it this morning like imagine turning up for the first day like that
James Potter: youd think hed have least timed his yearly bath to coincide with the start of school
Remus Lupin: you guys shouldn’t be so mean about him
Remus Lupin: im just kidding can you imagine
-
James Potter to petition for dumbledore to make a rule about school bathing regulations: lupin we all saw u go off with that bird at break
James Potter: whats the 411 lil mama
James Potter: whats the hot goss
Remus Lupin: nothing, she’s the new exchange student i was showing her around
Sirius Black: sure
James Potter: that hickey under your collar get there by itself did it
Remus Lupin: we’re not talking about this
Peter Pettigrew: Guys shut up i have English and McG is giving me the worst look
-
Sirius Black to now taking bets for how long it takes sirius to get a detention off mcgonagall: where have you and the swedish girl got to on the snogging scale???
Remus Lupin: shes danish
Remus Lupin: and what the fuck is the snogging scale
James Potter: me and siri invented it
James Potter: 1) holding hands
2) arm around
3) good-night kiss
4) kiss lasting over three minutes without a breath
5) open mouth kissing
6) tongues
7) upper body fondling—outdoors
8) upper body fondling—indoors (in bed)
9) below waist activity
10) the full monty
Remus Lupin: why am i friends with either of you
Sirius Black: we were thirteen
James Potter: oh so suddenly now that you’re 18 you’re too COOL for the snogging scale????????
Peter Pettigrew: CAN YOU STOP HAVING IMPORTANT DISCUSSIONS WHILE IM IN CLASS WITH MCGONAGALL
Sirius Black: o i thought this was the chat without peter
Peter Pettigrew: Fuck off
-
Peter Pettigrew to Remus Lupin: You don’t really have a chat without me do you ?????
Peter Pettigrew: ??????????????????
Peter Pettigrew: Remus
-
James Potter to Ace Gang: NEW GIRL ALERT
Peter Pettigrew: Yeah, we’ve already seen her. You were there when we walked in on lupin in that EXTREMELY compromising position
Remus Lupin: if you don’t drop it im leaving the chat
James Potter: NOT HER
James Potter: ANOTHER ONE
James Potter: SHES FRIENDS WITH ALICE THE LAUGH
James Potter: SHES THE LOVE OF MY LIFE
Sirius Black: you walked in on remus doing HWAT
Remus Lupin has left the chat.
James Potter has added Remus Lupin to the chat.
James Potter: THIS IS IMPORTANT
James Potter: WE NEED A PLAN
James Potter: HOW DO I GET HER TO FALL IN LOVE WITH ME
Peter Pettigrew: Maybe say hello to her
James Potter: WHAT
Remus Lupin: pete don’t be ridiculous. james would NEVER do something that easy and straightforward
James Potter: i am having a CRISIS here
Sirius Black: please tell me what you walked in on remus doing with the danish girl
Remus Lupin has left the chat.
James Potter added Remus Lupin to the chat.
James Potter: everyone is on intel until further notice
Peter Pettigrew: Yeah okay
Remus Lupin: alright
Sirius Black changed the group name to Lupin’s Nonspecific But Indisputable Lovers’ Tryst With Eddie Redmayne.
Remus Lupin has left the chat.
-
Remus Lupin to Ace Gang and don’t you dare change it sirius black: her name’s Lily Evans
Remus Lupin: Marlene McKinnon says she just moved here from Derby
James Potter: omg remus i could kiss you
Remus Lupin: Mar also said her family’s opened an organic shop on high st
Sirius Black: how nutritious
James Potter: no one asked you
-
James Potter to Sirius Black: what categories have you come up with for the physical attractiveness test
Sirius Black: skin hair eyes nose figure mouth teeth
Sirius Black: all out of ten
James Potter: fab ill do up a table in word now and go to the library first thing at break to print us 4 copies
Sirius Black: marvy
-
James Potter to sirius no one is going to dare you to hack into the school and play gasolina over the loudspeaker at assembly on monday so stop angling for it: which of you fuckers gave me a 3 for my eyes
Sirius Black: it was purely based on their functionality
Sirius Black: you can barely see without ur glasses
Sirius Black: very poor eyes
James Potter: so it wasn’t abt how i look
Sirius Black: i didn’t say that
James Potter: sirius uve rly hurt me
James Potter: what about the 4 for my mouth
Sirius Black: that one was bc you ordered pineapple on the pizza
James Potter: i told u it was an ACCIDENT
Remus Lupin: im retrospectively docking 2 points off every single category for both of you
Peter Pettigrew: Im docking 3
-
Remus Lupin to Ace Gang: have to ditch saturday afternoon lads
Sirius Black: um why
Peter Pettigrew: Yeah whats more important than season six of the simpsons
Remus Lupin: i got a job
Sirius Black: where
Remus Lupin: Evans’ Organic Trade
James Potter: YOU GOT A JOB IN EVANS’ SHOP AND YOU DIDNT THINK TO TELL ME
Remus Lupin: im literally telling you right now dickhead
Remus Lupin: also it’s time travel
Sirius Black: it is NOT time travel it is CLEARLY an alternate universe you dithering FOOL
Peter Pettigrew: You’re both wrong its a time loop
James Potter changed the group name to donnie darko is BANNED from the group discourse.
Peter Pettigrew: Just because YOU thought it was a dream
-
Sirius Black to Friends Of James Potter Support Group: OMG
Sirius Black: PETTIGREW I CANT BELIEVE UR MISSING THIS
Peter Pettigrew: Whats happening tell meeee
Sirius Black: we just went into lupins shop
Sirius Black: evans wasn’t even here
Sirius Black: she just came out with a cup of tea for lupin and james ACTUALLY screamed,,,,,,,,,,,, evans almost dropped the mug
Sirius Black: lupin just introduced us and shes given him this look like “they better not be loitering” so hes selling me onions so she doesn’t kick us out
Sirius Black: lupin i dont want these and i shant pay for them
Sirius Black: evans is trying to talk to prongs but hes just giving her heart eyes
Sirius Black: she just asked if hes in her french class and he SQUEAKED
Sirius Black: day 13. james has still not spoken a word of english to evans
Sirius Black: day 27. hes said “mfngggg” instead of yes the stupid git
Peter Pettigrew: Fucking hell im still in this stupid mother son bonding thing for another half hour
Sirius Black: MOTHER SON BONDING
Sirius Black: siri set a reminder to mock peter later
Sirius Black: lupin just took the tea and evans has revealed shes in a BAND
Sirius Black: prongs has found his voice (!) and hes making the aziz ansari :D face which, unfortunately, makes him look like a total prat
Peter Pettigrew: Rookie error
Sirius Black: she just told him they’re called the stiff dylans and he just nodded really seriously and said “great name” im going to knock him out if only to stop him embarrassing himself further the stupid git
Sirius Black: fun facts about lily evans: she plays bass and she thinks james has brain damage probably
Sirius Black: JAMES JUST INADVERTENTLY TOLD HER SHE HAS REALLY BIG HANDS AND SHE WAS DEADASS LIKE
Sirius Black: “……………………okay”
Peter Pettigrew: BIG HANDS
Sirius Black: HER CAT just came out and prongs has jumped on the opportunity my boy he did it he managed to steer his way onto a topic he knows something about
Sirius Black: more fun facts about lily evans: her cat is called elizabeth bennet and she thinks james has brain damage definitely
Sirius Black: evans laughed at “we just call him sir jeremy but his real name is sir jeremy cattington the third, prince of purrsia and king under the meowntain” thank god
Sirius Black: he told her about how he used to take sir jeremy on walks by the beach but he ate his collar and his lead why is he like this
Sirius Black: prongs my man you sound like an eharmony profile gone wrong
Sirius Black: she mentioned hr sister,,,,,,,,,,,petunia
Sirius Black: the evans parents had a thing for matching names me and evans have so much in common
Sirius Black: FLEAMONT JUST WALKED IN PETE I CANT BELIEVE U ARENT HERE I SWEAR TO GOD YOU COULD NOT WRITE THIS
Peter Pettigrew: Noooo omg
Sirius Black: monty: “james????? what are you doing here? you hate vegetbles”
Sirius Black: james: “haha dad you’re so funny but of course i LOVE vegetables as we all know”
Sirius Black: monty: “james. the last time your mother tried to serve you broccoli you threatened to run away from home”
Sirius Black: james: “haha i was a picky kid, wasn’t i”
Sirius Black: monty deadass just looked right at evans and said “james that was wednesday” that man is my Hero
Sirius Black: lupin literally ducked behind the counter so prongs couldn’t see him laughing the lucky git prongs is glaring daggers at me
Sirius Black: evans is giving him the WORST pitying look omg poor jam he looks like he did when chelsea lost the final last year
Sirius Black: evans is gone holy shit i cant believe u missed this pete
Peter Pettigrew: :(
-
James Potter to Sirius Black: how am i ever going to be able to face her again ??????
James Potter: i love my dad but he can be so beyond the valley of the thick sometimes
Sirius Black: he wasnt that bad
Sirius Black: i dont think evans even took any notice
James Potter: are u SURE my dad hasnt ruined it ????
Sirius Black: j
Sirius Black: it was reaaaally fab
James Potter: fabbity fab?
Sirius Black: with knobs on.
Sirius Black: besides im sure evans will understand
Sirius Black: all parents say stupid things sometimes
Sirius Black: shell probably like u more bc shell feel bad uve got a dad who’s BEYOND bonkerdom
James Potter: you’re right
Sirius Black: i kno :~)
James Potter: i love you but don’t ever send me that face again
-
Peter Pettigrew to James Potter: I can’t believe you told evans she has big hands
James Potter: you werent even THERE
-
Remus Lupin to Ace Gang :~): anyone seen black
James Potter: hes in detention
Remus Lupin: what for this time
James Potter: handing out onions at assembly
Peter Pettigrew: The onions from sunday??
Sirius Black: no peter, a completely different set of onions
Peter Pettigrew changed the group name to Sirius stop being mean to me.
-
James Potter to everyone be meaner than usual to peter: what the fuck is evans doing with snivellus
Sirius Black: wot
Peter Pettigrew: We just walked past them and it looked Really Bad
Peter Pettigrew: She was holding his hand
James Potter: what the FUCK has he got going on that i dont
James Potter: this is fucking ridiculous. snape. who the fuck does he think he is
Remus Lupin: ill see what i can find out at work on monday
-
James Potter to Peter Pettigrew: is it weird to like evans’ band on fb if we’re not friends
Peter Pettigrew: Just fucking add her dude
-
Sirius Black to James Potter: look ive been doing some thinking and if u rly want 2 impress evans ur gonna have 2 up ur snogging game
James Potter: what the fuck
Sirius Black: dont argue im the best judge of this
Sirius Black: ur like. ok at kissing but i feel like u could b better
Sirius Black: there’s a kid on andy’s block who does snogging lessons after school his name is frank and hes a 7 maybe 7 and a half if u don’t wear ur glasses
James Potter: what is wrong with u
Sirius Black: u say that like ur not gonna look into it
James Potter: fuck off
-
Peter Pettigrew to the queen does NOT wear a 44DD: Hes just gone in
Peter Pettigrew: Cant believe neither of you came you missed OUT
Remus Lupin: what happened
Peter Pettigrew: He knocked on the door and this bloke came out and like. Objectively and all but he is Fit™
Peter Pettigrew: And he looked prongs up and down and was like
Peter Pettigrew: "I dont usually do boys but christ if you dont look like the saddest git ive ever seen"
Peter Pettigrew: I gave him a thumbs up on the way in
Remus Lupin: cant believe i missed it
Sirius Black: how did u get the tm thing like that
Peter Pettigrew: Copy it and save it as a keyboard shortcut
Sirius Black: ™™™™™™™™™™™™™™™
Peter Pettigrew: Stop
Sirius Black: no™
Remus Lupin: what have you done
-
Sirius Black to James Potter: so its like THAT is it ??????????? my kissing not good enough for you ?????????
James Potter: babe
James Potter: ur my first kiss ull always hold a special spot in my heart
Sirius Black: i need time
James Potter: YOU’RE THE ONE WHO TOLD ME ABOUT LONGBOTTOM IN THE FIRST PLACE YOU TWIT
-
James Potter, Snogging Sensation to i, sirius black, am giving james potter the cold shoulder: he put on careless whisper
Sirius Black: WHAT
Sirius Black changed to group name to i, sirius black, am now only giving james potter the lukewarm shoulder.
James Potter, Snogging Sensation: and hes from saliva CITY hes got nothing on u babe i promise
Sirius Black changed the group name to in light of new information, james potter and i, sirius black, have reconciled.
Remus Lupin changed the group name to Ace Gang.
Sirius Black: buzzkill
-
James Potter to gasolina is a Bad Song: mum’s got a promotion???????
Remus Lupin: tell her congrats
James Potter: it’s back in india though??????????????
Remus Lupin: oh
Sirius Black: you’re not moving are you
James Potter: i honestly don’t know
James Potter: im freaking out
James Potter: come round please
Peter Pettigrew: Holy shit
Peter Pettigrew: Ill pick everyone up
James Potter: they’re ruining my life and they still won’t let me have a party
-
James Potter to Rip in pieces james’ life in england: i have a plan
Remus Lupin: here we go
James Potter changed the group name to don’t message me in that tone of voice lupin.
Sirius Black: whats the plan
James Potter: evans likes cats. i like cats. i have a cat. and if that cat got lost i would be distraught. and if evans knew how upset i was shed help me find him.
Sirius Black: but sir jeremy isnt lost
James Potter: evans doesnt know that OBVIOUSLY
James Potter: honestly sirius sometimes i think youre half boy half turnip
Remus Lupin: jesus christ
James Potter changed the group name to im warning you lupin.
James Potter: i “””lose””” sir jeremy but you lot have him at the park then when u see us coming u let him loose and evans will chase him down and shell feel like a hero and shell get so caught up in the euphoria of the moment that shell kiss me and realise that we’re perfect for each other
Remus Lupin: ur insane
James Potter removed Remus Lupin from the chat.
Peter Pettigrew: You GUYS you KNOW im in english right now
Sirius Black: ffs peter just turn your phone on do not disturb when ur in mcg’s class
Peter Pettigrew: But i always forget to turn it back
-
James Potter to Sirius Black: i went round her shop but she said she was too busy helping her mum
Sirius Black: rip™
-
Lily Evans has sent you a friend request.
Accept / Decline
-
Lily Evans to James Potter: begged off work. kno id be devo if i lost lizzy. wher r u?
James Potter: the beach
Lily Evans: be there asap x
-
James Potter to Sirius Black: plans back on
Sirius Black: oh okay
Sirius Black: small prob™ sir jeremy actually got loose
James Potter: she ended her message with an x
James Potter: does this mean she likes me
James Potter: wait WHAT
-
James Potter to Lily Evans: thanks so much for your help on sunday
Lily Evans: it was my pleasure. even if your cat IS mental.
James Potter: im telling him you said that
Lily Evans: noooooooooo
James Potter: so
Lily Evans: ominous.
James Potter: are you glad you moved to eastbourne?
Lily Evans: i guess. it's pretty chill
Lily Evans: have u always lived here?
James Potter: yeah
James Potter: its called gods waiting room
James Potter: because people come here to die
Lily Evans: ur being dramatic.
Lily Evans: i heard eastbournes the new brighton.
James Potter: yeah
James Potter: as if
Lily Evans: idk i like it here. its more peaceful than derby and the beach is soo good for ~song writing inspo~
James Potter: what do you write ur songs abt ?
Lily Evans: idk. life
Lily Evans: the universe
Lily Evans: how reality tv’s brainwashing us
James Potter: wow
Lily Evans: ikr
James Potter: careful, you’re starting to sound like my dad
Lily Evans: i dont mind so much, your dad’s pretty cool.
James Potter: ????
Lily Evans: he comes into the shop a lot.
James Potter: oh my god
James Potter: promise you wont take anything he says about me seriously
Lily Evans: no problem aha
James Potter: what about your dad? does he work in the shop too?
Lily Evans: no, he’s :/
Lily Evans: he died.
James Potter: oh. im so sorry, lily.
Lily Evans: its okay. its why my mum moved us out here and opened up the shop.
Lily Evans: she always wanted one
Lily Evans: eastbourne is such a step back from derby and i like it because it means me and petunia can keep an eye on her you know?
James Potter: i think i understand why you like it here
-
James Potter to evans showed prongs her O face: mum and dad are fighting about india again
Remus Lupin: fuck
Sirius Black: ):
Peter Pettigrew: )):
Sirius Black: stop trying to one up me, pettigrew
-
Frank Longbottom has sent you a friend request.
Accept / Decline
-
James Potter to longbottom has the hots for prongs: mum’s just left
James Potter: so thats that then
Peter Pettigrew: Drinks at mine?
James Potter: yeah
-
James Potter to Remus Lupin: will you mention how shit snape is and how good i am when ur on shift with evans today
Remus Lupin: no you sad git i will not
James Potter: remus i LOVE her
James Potter: ill buy you a twix from the vending machine
Remus Lupin: alright
-
Sirius Black changed the group name to twix are grim.
Remus Lupin changed the group name to twix are grim but not as grim as curly wurlys.
Sirius Black: you’ve really hurt me, lupin
Remus Lupin: good.
-
James Potter to Remus Lupin: ???????????
James Potter: ur off shift now did you talk abt me ???????
Remus Lupin: no
Remus Lupin: and i already ate the twix so dont ask for it back
-
Peter Pettigrew to evans thinks snape is a clingy sod #confirmed: Watch out prongs
James Potter: for what
Remus Lupin: for that, i assume
Sirius Black: im in lunch detention what happened
Remus Lupin: longbottom’s making a come on at james
Sirius Black: McYikes
Remus Lupin: “why havent you accepted my friend request?” – longbottom
Remus Lupin: “because were not friends” – james
Sirius Black: james ur gonna get urself decked one day
Sirius Black: so can u stop being a little shit when im not around to watch thanks
James Potter: no promises
-
Remus Lupin to twin peaks season 3 fan theories club: sirius can you link me to that compilation video of diego luna saying he wants to touch jabba the hut
Remus Lupin: i want to show it to lily at work this afternoon
Sirius Black: ya sure
Sirius Black: https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=qGKrc3A6HHM
Remus Lupin: if i follow that link and it isnt to the video i asked for im not going to be your partner for the history assignment
Sirius Black: ………………..
Sirius Black: https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=HDU3PojzaHk
Remus Lupin: thank you
Peter Pettigrew changed the group name to Gasolina is banned from the group playlist.
-
James Potter to Gasolina (INCLUDING all derivative remixes reimaginings and covers) is banned from the group playlist: EVANS LIKES STAR WARS
James Potter: ???!?!?!?!??!!!!!??!?!?!?!??!?!?!?!?
Remus Lupin: james that was three hours ago get with the times
James Potter: but i was at P R A C T I C E
Sirius Black: too bad so sad
-
Remus Lupin to Peter Pettigrew: WHOA
Peter Pettigrew: U watching from chem window?????
Remus Lupin: ya what just happened??????????????????
Peter Pettigrew: Snape tripped up james on the way to goal
Remus Lupin: is he ok??????
Peter Pettigrew: Hes got a bloody nose but hes okay
Remus Lupin: i meant snape
Peter Pettigrew: O na
Peter Pettigrew: I think james is gonna murder him lol
-
Sirius Black to marauding fools quote unquote minnie mcgonagall: mary mcdonald in the year below is having a party tomorrow night n i charmed her into giving us all invites
Sirius Black: well, she invited ME and i guess u lads can come as my collective date
Remus Lupin: im already invited
James Potter: me too
Peter Pettigrew: She invited me three weeks ago
Sirius Black: i got invited after PETTIGREW ????????? who the fuck
Sirius Black: Im Not Going™
Remus Lupin: yes u are
Peter Pettigrew: Yes u are
James Potter: yes u are
Sirius Black: Yes I Am™
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Peter Pettigrew to Ace Gang: Why did you tell her i lost a SOCK ??????
Remus Lupin changed the group name to kickstarter to find peter’s missing third sock.
James Potter: i had to say SOMETHING
Remus Lupin: james, ever ridiculous under pressure
James Potter: besides, YOU’RE the one who pushed us behind a bush as if she would have thought it was weird that we at SCHOOL
Peter Pettigrew: I panicked
Peter Pettigrew: Lily said she thought snape tripping you was a dick move though
James Potter: trying to distract me by mentioning evans, huh???
Peter Pettigrew: Is it working
James Potter: i wish i could say no
Remus Lupin: id like to point out lily also said you should go up for the school team
Remus Lupin: so she clearly doesn’t care enough about you to know that you’re already. captain
Sirius Black: lupin stop being a flaky bitch
Sirius Black: thats my job
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Peter Pettigrew to pres at james’ because its closest to mary’s NOT because its in any way a superior house to any other house accessible 2 the group: Did i just hear ur dad call u a minger
James Potter: if u have 2 ask u already kno the answer
Sirius Black: In Fleamont We Trust™
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Sirius Black to party boiis: PRONGS IS THAT YOU OUTSIDE WITH FRANK LONGBOTTOM
James Potter: he fucking ambushed me
James Potter: evans didn’t see did she ?????????????????????????
Peter Pettigrew: Nah dont think so
Sirius Black: hes lying she absolutely did
James Potter: fuck this im going home
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Remus Lupin to Sirius Black: i swear to god if you’re the one who just put on gasolina im blocking you
Sirius Black: (:
Remus Lupin: we arent friends
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Remus Lupin to James Potter: me and lily are going to the pool this afternoon
Remus Lupin: 2:30pm
Remus Lupin: in case you wanted to coincidentally turn up
James Potter: what so i can aggravate her by drowning snape?
Remus Lupin: snape isnt coming
James Potter: oh. why not?
Remus Lupin: probably afraid of water
James Potter: explains why he never washes
Remus Lupin: lmao
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James Potter to Sirius Black: me and moony are going to the pool and you’re coming
Sirius Black: as in the public pool????????
James Potter: obvi
Sirius Black: excusez-moi, c’est très grotesque
Sirius Black: im NOT going to the public pool little kids pee in that and the chlorine makes my hair go all frizzy
James Potter: i cant believe you’re abandoning me, your best friend, in his time of greatest need
Sirius Black: and you say IM dramatic
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Remus Lupin to Ace Gang: what happened after we left yesterday???????
James Potter: idk it was weird
James Potter: we did handstands and she made fun of my pale legs ): then she tried to drown me but in like a ~playful~ way
James Potter: and i told her im not with frank longbottom in any capacity and she said “well that’s good then”
James Potter: and then she kissed me
Sirius Black: SHE KISSED YOU
Sirius Black changed the group name to EVANS KISSED JAMES EVANS KISSED JAMES EVANS KISSED JAMES EVANS ! KISSED ! JAMES !.
Remus Lupin: get in !!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!
Peter Pettigrew: Result omg
James Potter: but then she said she had to go sort some stuff out and that she’d text me
Remus Lupin: oh, james
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James Potter to Sirius Black: evans should text soon then that’s sorted and we should step up the party plans
James Potter: we’ve got so much left to sort
James Potter: venue, fashion statements, colour scheme
Sirius Black: you should do black and white
James Potter: ! marvy
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James Potter to Remus Lupin: what does it mean when a girl kisses you and says she’ll text you does it mean she’ll /text you or does it mean she’ll message you on facebook
James Potter: because there’s a big difference
James Potter: remus ???????????????????????????
Remus Lupin: james its 4 in the morning
James Potter: so???????? ur awake arent u ???????????????? what does it mean ??????
James Potter: remus uve kissed the most girls u have to know
James Potter: remus
James Potter: remus please
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Frank Longbottom has sent you a friend request.
Accept / Decline
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James Potter to Sirius Black: i need a drink
Sirius Black: what happened????
Sirius Black: im omw btw
James Potter: mum called and she wants me and dad to move out to india with her
James Potter: dad doesnt want to go but he also doesnt want to be away from mum any more im freaking out siri i might actually move back to india what the fuck
James Potter: and on top of that longbottom showed up at my house and tried to apologise how did he even get my address
Sirius Black: im here come open the door
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Alice theLaugh to James Potter: is it tru that ur gay?
James Potter: idk i dont reckon
Alice theLaugh: didnt think u were, lily said u werent
James Potter: really? what did she say ???????????
Alice theLaugh: just that she knows 4 sure u arent
Alice theLaugh: are u going to the stiff dylans gig saturday?
James Potter: not sure yet
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James Potter to Sirius Black: she kissed me and then left me on read at 3:45
Sirius Black: aw :/
James Potter: shut the fuck up
James Potter: she didn’t even tell me abt her gig in brighton
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James Potter to james’ wet dream about evans: sirius i cannot believe you told my father about lily evans
Sirius Black: thats not fair
Sirius Black: u kno monty has an uncanny ability to get info out of me
Sirius Black changed James Potter’s nickname to the naff boy who had the sad party that no one went to.
the naff boy who had the sad party that no one went to: stop taking advantage of my vulnerability !
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Remus Lupin to Everyone sign up for hindi on duolingo out of solidarity to james: watch out lads james has his plan face on
Remus Lupin: brace for impact
Peter Pettigrew: Oh geez
James Potter: fuck off then lupin i wont tell u then
James Potter removed Remus Lupin from the chat.
James Potter: now that we’re alone
James Potter: im gonna make evans jealous
Peter Pettigrew: Im afraid to ask how
James Potter: im going with alice the laugh to the stiff dylans gig
Sirius Black: christ james that’s pretty shitty
Sirius Black: that was lupin
Sirius Black: i say first, what could possibly go wrong
Sirius Black: second, what the fuck is alice the laugh’s real last name
Sirius Black: ive known her for 6 years and i dont know what it is
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Peter Pettigrew to Friends Of James Potter Support Group: Say aye if ur completely unsurprised to learn i just overheard james respond to alice the laugh telling him he looks good tonight with “thanks, you’re very honest”
Sirius Black: aye
Remus Lupin: aye
Peter Pettigrew: “Alice you make me laugh like a loon on loon tablets”
Sirius Black: #yikes
Sirius Black: i have the shot
Remus Lupin: take it
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Alice theLaugh to James Potter: i had a great time tonight
James Potter: haha me too
Alice theLaugh: best night of my life x
James Potter: o.k. see you at school on monday
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Lily Evans to Sirius Black: so ur the one who put on gasolina at mary mcdonald’s party.
Sirius Black: what makes u say that ?
Lily Evans: you shouted “play gasolina” no less than 11 times last night.
Sirius Black: that doesnt sound like me
Sirius Black: are u sure it wasnt lupin ?
Sirius Black: that worldly bastard he sure does love puerto rican music
Lily Evans: i just texted him and he said “im surprised sirius even knows what puerto rico is”.
Sirius Black: fucker
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Sirius Black to James Potter: oi cheer up
Sirius Black: what are you thinking about?
James Potter: poor alice
James Potter: i keep seeing her face when she tried to kiss me
James Potter: god i feel like such an arse for leading her on
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James Potter to Alice theLaugh: you okay? you looked pretty upset in maths
Alice theLaugh: hope your plan worked
James Potter: what?
Alice theLaugh: marlene mckinnon overheard black telling lupin that you only went out with me to make lily jealous
Alice theLaugh: you’re a heartless user
Alice theLaugh: what you did, that’s just pants, that is
James Potter: i’m really sorry, alice
Alice theLaugh: i really thought you thought i was a laugh
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Sirius Black to James Potter: i told you im sorry
Sirius Black: are you really going to ignore me over this
Sirius Black: like for real james pull your head out of your arse for twenty seconds and realise how shitty you’re being
Sirius Black: all your scheming and pretending
Sirius Black: honestly it’s no wonder evans never fucking texted you
James Potter: don’t talk to me again.
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Lily Evans to James Potter: you’ve really pissed off a lot of people.
Lily Evans: alice is really cut up. she’s my mate, james.
James Potter: i didnt mean to use her.
James Potter: you never texted me when you said you would
Lily Evans: i handled it really badly, i know
Lily Evans: things got messy
Lily Evans: i didn’t want to hurt anyone’s feelings.
James Potter: so you were thinking of breaking up with snape and then you were gonna text me?
Lily Evans: lmao what
Lily Evans: severus and i aren’t together.
James Potter: but you hold his hand
Lily Evans: i hold marlene’s had too but that doesnt mean im dating her.
Lily Evans: you know how much he hates you and it makes it hard, james, but yeah, i was gonna text you.
Lily Evans: and then i saw you with alice at my gig and i was gutted.
Lily Evans: but that’s different now.
Lily Evans: i thought YOU were different than that james but you’re not, you’re just some fuck off rich kid who only thinks about himself.
Lily Evans: i think it’s probably best if you don’t message me again.
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James Potter to Remus Lupin: had a talk with lily. turns out shes not actually with snape.
Remus Lupin: i actually do not care, james. work things out with sirius or fuck off.
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James Potter to Peter Pettigrew: i think i might have just gotten my mum fired
Peter Pettigrew: Go on, i guess
James Potter: i went to her office and talked to her boss and i think i just made things worse
Peter Pettigrew: Yeah, you’re getting pretty good at that
James Potter: i guess i am, yeah.
James Potter: im cancelling the party and ive told dad i want to move to india
James Potter: if either of the others ask
Peter Pettigrew: I’ll pass it on.
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James Potter to Lily Evans: hi.
James Potter: i know you didn’t want me to message you again and i don’t blame you for that but i have to say this and then it’s done.
James Potter: what you said really hurt, but you were right. it wasnt me. it was beyond pants, and i really am sorry. i messed everything up with you, and with alice and with sirius and i guess i just got caught up in my own idea of how our lives should be and i got carried away
Lily Evans: i cut all ties with severus last night.
James Potter: oh.
Lily Evans: yeah.
Lily Evans: you know, i wrote a song about you.
James Potter: really?
Lily Evans: its called Bitch In A Uniform.
Lily Evans: i wrote it when i was pissed off with you.
Lily Evans: but i still like you, james. even though you’re mental.
James Potter: no you don’t
Lily Evans: i do.
Lily Evans: i cant stop thinking about you. i was hoping
Lily Evans: maybe
Lily Evans: we can go out?
James Potter: oh, fuck
Lily Evans: ?
James Potter: im moving to india
Lily Evans: what the fuck is wrong with you
Lily Evans: you’re so
Lily Evans: random
James Potter: 100% legit this time.
Lily Evans: that’s a goddamn shame.
Lily Evans: im at the beach if you wanted to come hang out.
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James Potter to Sirius Black: feels really shitty without you
James Potter: im so so sorry
James Potter: can you ever forgive me?
Sirius Black: ur gonna have to buy me at least 16 curly wurlys
James Potter: its done.
Sirius Black: happy birthday you massive tosser xxx
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joe to the jonas brothers: operation stun-the-pants-off-james-with-an-amazing-surprise-party is a go
joe changed the group name to Friends Of James Potter Support Group.
nick: oh thank GOD
kevin: I was wondering how long you’d hold out
nick: you’re both so stupid
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James Potter to prongs is finally legal ;): cant believe all you wankers are busy tonight
James Potter: like i know we were all in a fight but you ALL have plans ????????
James Potter: dad’s taken pity on me and is taking me to a club this is the saddest 18th ever
Remus Lupin: sry fam
Peter Pettigrew: Lol
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JAMES POTTER’S SUPER SECRET 18TH BIRTHDAY PARTY
Private º Hosted by Sirius Black and 2 others.
312 going º 167 maybe
27 March 19:30 – 28 March 8:00
Details
james is a prat but hes our best friend so lets all get together and show him that being legal to drink doesnt take away the fun of it !! event will have an open bar courtesy of mr & mrs p
theme is black and white !
only one rule : DONT TELL JAMES ABOUT IT
anyone who does will be blacklisted from the party loool good luck telling your grandkids about how you didn’t get to come to the most important party of our generation
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Peter Pettigrew to Fleamont Potter: The eagle has landed i repeat the eagle has landed
Fleamont Potter: Thanks son :~) Jem’s going to be so excited to see his mum.
Fleamont Potter: We’re up on the balcony by the bar, send her our way :~)
Peter Pettigrew: Will do, sarge
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Lily Evans: happy birthday xxx hope you like ur present.
James Potter: my present?
James Potter: OH MY GOD
James Potter: YOU WROTE ME A SONG ?!?!?!
James Potter: lily evans i honestly think i love you
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Marlene McKinnon to Remus Lupin: we can’t hear properly from up the back what did snape just say
Remus Lupin: “james potter is a girl-nabbing letch who can’t keep his slutty minx hands off other peoples’ girlfriends”
Marlene McKinnon: WHAT
Remus Lupin: “you’re just a big fat minging minger with horridious eyesight and the opposite of a haircut”
Remus Lupin: don’t worry, black’s filming the whole thing im sure it’ll be on youtube asap
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Sirius Black to Ace Gang except all of us are legal™ now: id be lying if i said i remembered anything past monty and effy swing dancing
Remus Lupin: im fairly certain i walked in on frank longbottom and alice the laugh fucking in the mens
Remus Lupin: but i, too, am fuzzy on the details
Peter Pettigrew: I woke up at the lido. No idea how i got there
Remus Lupin: i just found this in my camera roll
Remus Lupin set a photo.
Peter Pettigrew: What the fuck
Remus Lupin: i have no memory of taking this and im glad of that fact because the camerawork here is shameful
James Potter: YOU’RE KIDDING
James Potter: YOU DON’T REMEMBER PETER FINDING A RAT IN THE BINS BEHIND THE CRICKET CLUB
James Potter: AND NAMING IT INIGO MONTOYA
James Potter: PETER YOU STILL HAD IT WHEN I LEFT YOU FOUR HOURS LATER
Peter Pettigrew: I mean that definitely sounds like me
James Potter changed Peter Pettigrew’s nickname to cryptid: ratboii.
cryptid: ratboii: Cheers
cryptid: ratboii: Where did you get to, anyway?
James Potter: me and evans went to the beach
Remus Lupin: cuuuuuute
Sirius Black: and you didnt invite ME
James Potter: sirius you were passed out by 11 o clock
Sirius Black: WHAT
James Potter: yeah, evans poured you a quadruple shot of jager after you played gasolina through your iphone six times in a row
Sirius Black: you convinced me to drink JAGER??????????!?!?!?!??!!!!?!?!??!?!?!??!?!?
James Potter: i told you it was sambuca black and somehow that was okay with you
Sirius Black: wtf™
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James Potter added a life event.
DIDN’T move to India
56 likes
James Potter commented: love reacts only pls
Peter Pettigrew commented: A N G E R Y R E A C T
James Potter replied to Peter Pettigrew’s comment: ???????
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Peter Pettigrew to James Potter: I did duolingo every day even though ur not actually moving and im not gonna let it go to waste
Peter Pettigrew: बकरी मेरी प्रेमिका है
James Potter: peter you know i. cant read hindi i can only speak it right
Peter Pettigrew: ):
James Potter: i showed mum and she laughed and said it was cute
Peter Pettigrew: (:
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Sirius Black shared a video to James Potter’s timeline: “Stiff Dylans performance interrupted by GREASY RACIST exclusive”
Lily Evans commented: tag urself im the girlfriend
Remus Lupin commented: im peter in the background trying to get out of the shot but sirius keeps moving so hes still in frame
Sirius Black commented: im prongs’s slutty minx hands
James Potter commented: im the look on snapes face when lily kisses me
Peter Pettigrew commented: Im james drawing attention to the fact he conned lily into kissing him because he thinks weve all somehow missed him telling us every two seconds for the last three days
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James Potter is in a relationship with Lily Evans.
346 likes
Peter Pettigrew commented: Love react
Sirius Black commented: jealous react
Remus Lupin commented: L O V E R E A C T
#jily#james potter#lily evans#jily*#harry potter#hp#fic#angus thongs au#angus thongs and perfect snogging#ataps#my writing
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got assalted last night
so we went to the bar last night eh...u might have seen a couple of my snaps... i was pretty lit took a couple muscle relaxants couple advil and half an anti anxiety pill with bunch of drinks. i was feeling pretty loose... pretty on fleek..found some Minnie mouse ears some jumbo glasses in the snow was wearing them having the trillest time in the bar. Couple girls sitting down and one dude i was chatting up and the dude across the table was taking my pic with his friend haah bla bla bla.... anyways these girls at same table ask if i have a lighter..i currently did not for some reason and was like "no sorry i dont"... then they asked if i could get them one...and well i was kinda like damn these chicks hella lazy but im not doing anything so yea ill be a bro.... i go out to smoke balcony ask around..one guy says he has one but its his last so he would want it back... i said no problem i think these girls only need it for a bit...i didnt have any change so i gave him a 5 dollar bill as a deposit and said ill come back in 15 or 20 min. he was chill with that...i go back to the girls and one guy, hand them the lighter and say "here u go but just to let u know i need to give it back to this guy i gave a 5 dollar deposit ahah"... they said okay yea no problem.. i also let them know that the smoke pit was closing in 15 minutes to which they replied "yea no thanks come back in 15 and well give it back".....so 20 minutes goes by i come back.... the three of them havent seen to have moved at all... i say hey look balcony is closed now can i have the lighter back or u guys going to use it outside.... the girls said we gave it to our friend and pointed to guy behind me walking to to the table so i turn around and ask the guy "hey bro u got that lighter your friends here gave to you" he said "nah i never got a lighter i think its that guy who has it" points to another guy on my left walking up to the table.... i ask him same thing but also adding that i just gotta give it back to guy i borrowed from.....meanwhile im still standing at the table so the girls can hear all this and but are ignoring and talking to that one guy whos been sitting down the whole time...the last bro though says listen buddy the girls are fucking with you they have the lighter.... so now im looking at the girls and the guy sitting down and these two other guys who have also sat down and im standing... i say "hey listen i dont usually care that much its just a lighter but i went and got it for you and gave a guy 5 bucks who's expecting it back and i know one of you has it so can i have it back please and ill help u get a light later in the night when u actually plan on having a smoke"...one bitch faced dumb cunt looks at me and says "you are not getting your lighter back so just fuck off" at this point i am flabbergasted that 5 people who seemed chill are just letting this happen like its completely normal...so i walk off stunned not sure what to do..... i then sober up enough to realize what they did is not okay and this shit will not stand. i was however not by any means sober at this point... as i am walking i see salt and pepper shakers but u know like in corona bottles. i take the salt one pop off the lid walk back and to table pour a big fat line on their table that was empy and say "Heres seven years of bad luck motherfuckers!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!" i start briskly walking away but i didn't get more then a step before first bro that been there the whole time splashes his drink all over me from across the table throws his glass at me which smashes at impact with my cranium.. i am but a dazed, smelling like rum and coke soaking wet still walking off... i quickly realized i am severally outnumber 5 to 1 but like 3 to 1 cause girls dont count .... an idea pops into my head.... if im going to get the shit kicked out of me i need one of two things.. some back up... or my buddy to snapchat it/ upload to worldstar... i spot my friend from across the bar.. he is 6'5 and a real bro... i make my way to him tell him i might be in some trouble. we look over to other side across the whole bar at the table and i see this blue shirt roided out glass thowing motherfucker making his way through the swarm of people his eyes locked on my minnie mouse ears...i am ready, more than ready i am stoked.. i know how lit i am right now that this is going to be good i can take this fucker shits going down.... im thirsty for some blood... revenge flowing through my veins in the sea... a trickle of blood on my head from the glass ......who does that... douchbag of the year thats who.....he makes it right up in my face.. im waiting for him to strike first he gives me shove.. i step back one.. feeling the energy flow through me i am charged ready to go full force fists are clenched here we fucking go BUT WAIT!!!!!!! he pulls out a quick attack!!. its a trap card! in my brief moment of hesitation he has time to pull the salt bottle from behind his back and sprays it in face like a squirter getting double penatrated and finally cums ...its everywhere mate im fucking blind there is salt in my eyes i cant see shit it burns... one eye seems to be functioning enough to watch this coward ass bitch run back to his table....looks like i dunked my whole head in salt.. a little bit got on this bro behind me to and he is chapped... i tell him its that blue shirt fuck across the table.. hes fucking livid.. im blind in one eye but raging like a bull... the march is on. we start making our way back across the bar...all bets are off anything goes,. someone is going down hard tonight.... and hes wearing a blue shirt. 20 feet away now...15...10...fuckkkkkk bouncer is right between us talking to the girls while the blue shirt is sitting down back at his seat like nothing happened.. bouncer looks at me..hes got questions... im at 100 right now.... things need to change.. i open my mouth pull my tongue out and look at it.... yes its fucking silver. its my time to shine. time to bullshit like ive never bullshitted before. i bring myself down to 1... he says "these girls are saying u poured salt on all over them bud its time to fucking leave" i say " listen man thats not what happened, but i have no problem grabbing my jacket and leaving i dont want any trouble or confrontation but that guy behind you just came across the bar and poured salt in my face for no reason" thesed girls are now bitching in his ear he shushes them then tells them to go sit down back with blue fuck. bouncer says "did u pour salt all over them first though".... i say "buddy does it look like i poured salt on them.." he turns his head around to no joke like 10 feet behind us the three of them sitting at their table talking to each other pretending like nothing happened and they had won. they all looks fine. actually they look good... finely groomed... blue fuck is probably soaked between the legs with shit running down to his ankles but u cant see that the table is in the way... he looks back at me, my eye is watering face is fucking red shirt soaked salt all over me in my face hair ears on my shirt.. like fucking everywhere he says okay.. he believes every word im saying.. i can see it in his eye..he feels bad for me..he wants justice.. he asks me which guy i said that guy right behind u...in the blue..... he starts walking to go around the table.. meanwhile i step forward to across the table... stick out my hand and say loud enough that they can all hear including the bouncer who is now but a couple steps away walking around backside of this big table..... i say hey bud no hard feelings.. lets just be cool as my hand is extended waiting for a shake i fucking know will never come... and as i say it i wink right in his eyes and put a huge smirky grin on my face...... i see flames bursting out of his ears.. ive tipped the scale... he is about to explode foaming at the mouth. To little to late bud the bouncer puts his hand on his shoulder. blue fuck snaps throws his hand out of the way and stands up.... i retract my hand take two steps back and bring out the popcorn.... bouncer doesnt fuck around. Grabs him by the legs lifts him up and body slams down hard... im grabbing my ipod trying to snapchat its not woprkign its not working!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!! i just enjoy the moment.. bouncer fucking elbows this kids face so hard into the floor headlocks and starts dragging him out... i raise my hands start the slow clap. it feels so fucking good.. one girl is crying other is screaming. im practically laughing right back in there stupid cunt faces. One of his buddies thought hed step up to plate takes a swing at another bouncer.. bouncer hits back guy hits back again damn this sit looks even...bouncer charges fucking tackles him throws him across the table. he rolls onto chairs gets up 4 more come in and fucking sedue the guy smashed his head into the wall dragging him out by is feet... i am in tears laughing my crew is behind me now watching the whole thing. ... i turn to the bitches and say..... "thats what u get for bic'in me...guess your bad luck has already started"... one chick kicks me in the shins and they both go running off....... and that is some of the best 5 bucks ive every spent... like i said... i got asSALTed
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