How does Shiggy react to a darling who developed Stockholm Syndrome?

Shigaraki Tomura

TW: NSFW, captive darling, Stockholm Syndrome, ish benevolent sexism

fem reader

You kissed him a little while back.

It was strange, as though you’d forgotten yourself – lost yourself in the heat of the moment. But no, it had been deliberate and long-lasting – earnest and needy even. And had rendered him both speechless and in a panic.

He’d entered the room in a rigid mood and woken you up with a bite to your ass. Pulling your thighs snugly around him with his cock already swole between them – tugging your panties down your thighs while you were still rubbing the sleep from your eyes with a yawn. 

You’d learned rather quickly never to fight him. He’d punish you with bitemarks and no food, and ultimately you grew too weak to reject him anyway. So your casual acceptance wasn’t anything new where you patiently awaited getting fucked – lying on your back while looking down at his fat member disappearing inside you with only a tiny moan slipping free from your lips.

You took him obediently as you’d done for a while – without protest. The only difference occurred after he’d twisted the two of you around so you could straddle and ride him. You’d pressed your naked breasts into his chest and taken his face in your hands – gently as you rolled your hips without guidance – and then, right before the kiss, you’d said, so very softly, “I missed you today… it’s boring here without you~” 

Your voice was sultry, kissing him tender yet deeply – pouring sweet moans into his mouth while your hands tangled in his hair. 

You’d traveled to his neck after, and he came as soon as your tongue licked the scars found there – digging his fingers into the plush of your hips, keeping you seated as he spluttered all his worth inside you.

He’d been in such a state of post-shock that he’d rushed out just after. Leaving you.

Kurogiri had pointed out his blush while he sat at the bar, mulling it over with a bottle of brown in his grip. He shuddered, recurring the feeling – your pillowy wet lips on his, those words leaving your tongue, your hands playing with his hair, pulling him close. His chest felt tight, just as tight as the furrow between his brows.

Dabi sat down a couple of stools away sometime later in the night. Often, Shigaraki would abstain from engaging in conversation with the guy, but really, at least in this case, he was the best choice of any to ask for input. After all, they weren’t all that different. Actually, when it came to basics, they were both pretty similar – same-aged, ugly, and ridden with family issues from scars to fractured memories.

Dabi gave him a dumb look, his brow raised as though to ask what he was staring at after noticing his side-eye.

“You still have the same girl?” He jumped straight to it.

Dabi’s dumb expression turned dumber. Confused, maybe not so much by the question itself but by why the boss was even talking to him. But most emotions are like matches for Dabi, and they burn out before they’re able to light any fires. Soon, the usual sense of disinterest washed over him, and his face eased up into that chronic jaded look. 

Shigaraki nearly lost patience, reminded once again why he couldn’t stand the guy – rude as ever and so slow it made his skin itch. But then he gave his answer, “Yeah, I still have her.”

“She difficult?” Shigaraki followed up.

And Dabi took his time once again, hauling out the seconds before offering his answer in a drawl. “No, Stockholm Syndrome kicked in quickly.”

Shigaraki let it settle - Stockholm Syndrome – before looking back at his drink and repeating the thought once again. Stockholm Syndrome.

“It’s strange, isn’t it?” He mumbled then.

Dabi sighed, taking a swig of his beer. It was already the third one, but he’d only been sitting there for about half an hour. “Not really…” He disagreed. “Most girls are better survivors.”

It was Shigaraki’s turn to look dumb, looking puzzled as he stared down the barrel to his bottle – in wait of an explanation – almost as though he was under the impression it was the drink who was speaking and not the patch-faced raven-head sitting beside him.

“They learn quickly to accept what will keep them safe, and then, they find solace in whatever they can to maintain their mental health as well…” Said raven-haired guy continued – then he scoffed. “Boys fight until they break. Leaving them a shell of what they once were. But girls don’t have the same pride.”

He swirled his bottle, stove-top blue eyes lazy, looking at the last of his drink storm with waves inside the green glass.

“They leave themselves behind and become someone new.” He offered a dry chuckle, and Shigaraki spotted the unsightly way his staples only barely held the split of his smile together. “It’s actually kind of scary.” He finished before downing the last gulp, setting the bottle down with a bang.

He swung off his stool, shoving his hands down his pockets, and walked away – his back turned.

“If I were you, I’d embrace it, boss. Despite what we try to believe, that shit feels best when it’s given willingly.”

Shigaraki sat there a moment longer. Long enough to get cut off by Kurogiri, who told him drinking anymore would be a bad idea.

When he got back to the room, you were sleeping again.

He stood and stared at you for a moment. 

Was this a game you were playing? Was it a joke?

You’d pulled on one of his hoodies. And upon a closer look, you hadn’t showered either… 

Strange of you to leave his cum inside you... 

But thinking back about it, you hadn’t been so distant with him for a while already. You’d been trivial – conversational – even chirpy, if he could call it that.

Was it like Dabi said? Had you reached your breaking point for loneliness, leaving him to be your only resource? Or had you accepted the circumstances and willed yourself to play along? 

He didn’t know, but the doubt stormed an upset in his mind as he lifted the covers and laid down next to you. But despite the exhaustion, the lure of sleep still wasn’t enough to make him close his eyes – he was stuck staring at you, mapping out all those qualities that make up your pretty face.

So deep in his studies, he nearly flinched when your eyes fluttered open.

A small smile graced your lips soon after. “You’re back…” You murmured, eyes softly blinking at him before you scooched closer – shimmying yourself over to him until you were all the way up against his chest, nuzzling your head against his collar with sleepy sounds of comfort. Resting there for a blissful moment before purring out a sweet “Good night~”

But he couldn’t sleep that night. Too busy listening to your soft snores – feeling the clingy way you clutched his cotton T-shirt.

He couldn’t bring himself to touch you either. For a long while – it was as though he was… scared almost. Freaked out by your doting – that way you’d hug him when he entered through the door – placing kisses on places he wasn’t used to – his cheek, his forehead, his neck, his knuckles. 

Grabbing his sleeve. “Don’t go, Tomura…” You said once when he had his hand on the doorknob and the key halfway twisted in the lock. “Please… don’t leave.”

His throat went tight. It had been like that for a while – ever since that first kiss, actually, he’d been unable to talk to you – unsure what to say.

But you hadn’t the same issue.

“You haven't touched me in a while…” You continued, taking his hand away from the doorknob in both yours, playing with his fingers – bringing it up to your face – you cuddled it like he’d not threatened you with his touch many many many times before. “Are you bored with me?” You asked instead of the obvious, keeping him at a loss for words. “Or… have I scared you away?”

You? Scared him?

Your lips brushed his fingers as one of your hands made a slow descent – making him jerk with a gasp as it went straight to cup his groin – tender yet firm, giving it a squeeze.

“Is there anything I can do to make you stay?” You said coyly, eyes doe-like but kittenish all the same, with a pouty and small smirk playing on your lips before you bit into them – brows cinching, giving him a flirty pleading expression. “Please, Tomura?” You said his name as though it didn’t belong to him. “It gets so lonely here…” You kissed his palm. “Won’t you give me a proper goodbye, at least?”

The Issue with Eden Polycule

So I wanted to articulate my thoughts on a relationship that ive seen in fandom spaces and lots of fan art or fanfiction. I don’t have any opinions or problems with Adam/Eve/Lucifer/Lilith, but I feel like there are some implications and tropes that we should be more careful about when it comes to Eve/Lucifer/Lilith or even just Eve/Lucifer. Before getting into it though, just a disclaimer: this post is not about polycules in general. It’s not my cup of tea personally, but ship whatever you please! This post is just me rambling about my own thoughts. Feel free to have your own interpretations. ALSO! None of this justifies Adam’s behavior. He is responsible for his decisions, including his cruelty towards people, language, and his decision to essentially wage mass genocide each year. And this post isn’t to say that this relationship drama is the sole reason why he ended up doing exterminations.

1. I don’t really like portrayals that have Lucifer/Lilith (L/L) sleeping with Eve and having her cheat on Adam, especially when it takes place in Eden. I’m afraid Vivzie might have this narrative take place in HH, but doing so does a real disservice to Eve’s (and Lucifer’s if he acted alone) character by having her be willing to cheat, and also does a disservice to Adam by having him be cheated on for reasons that are probably not entirely his fault. Not to mention a lot of media where this happens often has the tone of just “haha let’s cuck Adam twice,” which comes off to me as petty and unfair. Not only is it not a funny joke, but it essentially reinforces and justifies Adam’s misogynistic tendencies later. Especially the ideas that women are promiscuous, always willing to cheat and be unfaithful. The narrative would do nothing to disprove this if BOTH of Adam’s wives did in fact cheat on him.

2. Another thing about Eden. Lilith was Adam’s first wife, literally created for the purpose of being his partner. This is also pre-Apple, meaning that Adam has no concept of right vs wrong. The way he acts, if he truly was controlling and mean and the story book wasn’t exaggerating (which I doubt), is entirely the programming of the angels and the way they tolerate or enable his behavior. Assuming we went with the theory that Adam never ate the apple, it’s the same situation with Eve if she left him and/or cheated with L/L. The way I see it, Lilith’s cheating on Adam is not justified, even if she disagreed with Adam on certain things.

3. I also want to note that cheating on one’s partner is not a justifiable punishment for Adam’s behavior. Whether pre or post apple (now assuming he did eat it), I see it as fighting fire with fire, and all it usually does is create even more hostility and problems than if the person just clearly broke off the relationship first. L/L/E runs the risk of inadvertently encouraging unfaithfulness in relationships and marriages as solutions to a problem, but this is rarely the case. As stated earlier, it only makes Adam justified in acting the way he does. And with that justification, is he really in the wrong for how he treats women? What reason does he have to change his behavior if he is right about them? I could probably accept both wives leaving him if the purpose is to justify Adam’s behavior and not just mock him, to show how morality is not just black and white and the villains sometimes have justifiable reasons for thinking the way they do. But it still seems very shallow on Lilith and Eve’s parts.

4. This part is just my opinion on L/L/E, but I don’t find the idea of Eve getting with the people who caused her to lose Eden very convincing. L/L are the reasons her and Adam were cast out of the garden and made to live for centuries laboring to survive, farming cursed ground and painfully delivering several children. Not to mention the bringing of sin and death into the world, losing Abel at the hands of his brother and Cain being cast away to wander the Earth. All the suffering she faced in life and the suffering of all of her descendants, all of humanity. Her sleeping with Lucifer makes no sense to me unless he seduced her (when she was more naive, maybe even pre-apple) intentionally, either for the purpose of hurting Adam or if he did just love her also, which makes him complicit in ruining someone’s marriage. None of this fits with Lucifer’s character, a malewife who adores his Tall Queen and comes off to me as being very loyal. The idea of open marriage is better, but Adam does not seem like the type of guy who likes to share anything, and his marriage is very clearly between Adam and Eve. That controlling personality indicated by the story book leads me to see him as likely having some jealousy and possessiveness (though not in extreme ways).

5. The only other option is Lucifer sleeping with Eve after her death and if she goes to hell, since we know Adam and Eve lived a thousand years married together on Earth, starting humanity. But I don’t see any reason for this. We need much much more information about Adam and Eve’s relationship and all four of their relationships’ to each other in general first before we can talk more about this. But until then, I don’t see any reason to break up Adam and Eve unless there’s some importance to it in the narrative. For me, I see Adam’s womanizing in heaven as a sign that Eve is probably not in heaven. And thinking that he’ll never see her again because “Hell is forever,” he eventually becomes bitter and jaded over thousands of years and decides that his relationship with Eve must be over then. Possibly the same case with Eve in hell, somehow leading up to sleeping with Lucifer. But considering she’s no where to be found with L/L and Lucifer only references her once, there seems to be zero indication of anything between them.

6. To briefly touch on the idea that once in heaven, Eve eventually left Adam because of his horrible personality and womanizing. This is still possible, but it seems like WAY too big of a personality shift to go from married and raising a family for a thousand years to suddenly being a massive asshole and a philanderer. Something must have happened that magnified all the worst aspects of his personality. There’s no way he is the same today as he was in Eden or on Earth. If he is, that’s just shitty lazy writing on Vivzie’s part and Adam is nothing but a one dimensional villain with no depth at all. Massive waste of a character with huge potential.

Tl;dr This post is already too long so I’ll just summarize everything. Although I agree that Adam is definitely an arrogant and annoying villain, Lilith and Eve cheating on adam is unjustified imo, there is no reason for Eve to cheat on Adam or leave him at all from what we can tell now, and her having any relationship with Lucifer also makes no sense considering what his choices turned her life into. But let me know your thoughts on all this, if there’s some point you want to make or a disagreement on something else!

It’s a theme day!

In honor of tumblr’s Speak Your Language Day (@spyld), I’ll be posting polls in languages other than English today! Here’s some caveats, and see below the read more for additional notes on translations and cities.

Some caveats:

Order of the options is the same as always, so you shouldn’t need translation tools.

The reading direction, formatting, and capitalization on some of these might be kind of funky. In some cases, very funky.

I’ve generally kept the format “city, state, country” although that is not typical in all languages.

I had to fill in some blanks to add the actual cities, and I also did a lot of copying and pasting. I’m sure I’ve made tons of mistakes, especially in languages with more complex conjugation and in those that use a different alphabet/writing system.

If you notice mistakes I’ve made, please feel free to leave a comment and I will add a note to the text of the post, since I can’t change the poll itself. But, to translate is to interpret and so if you simply disagree with a translator’s word choices please be respectful in how you voice your opinion. The people who helped make this day possible offered a service and their work is very appreciated!

Finally, you are always welcome to engage with my posts in your language of choice, but that goes double today! Comments, reblogs, and asks in any language are welcome.

How were languages chosen?

I opened a Google form about a month ago, and closed it after 25 languages. While I’m pleased with the variety, please understand that the families represented will be skewed by the blog’s demographics.

How were polls translated?

Polls were generously translated by followers using the form. In the case of multiple submissions, I prioritized native or fluent speakers, then typically chose the translation that was either the first one submitted or that had the most helpful notes. As mentioned in the caveats above, I then had to add in the cities.

How were cities chosen?

I wanted the city to be one where the submitted language is commonly used.

Translators had the opportunity to choose a city they wanted their translation to be used for; in the case of multiple suggestions I chose the first one submitted. If no eligible cities were suggested, I chose a city from the general submissions list. If that also didn’t have any eligible cities, I just picked a populous city in the country/region.

WIP Wednesday

Lokius. Virgin Dom Mobius finds out he has to go undercover...with Loki. 😏

“You’re going undercover,” Ravonna said, handing him a file and sitting down beside him on the sofa.

“Really? Wouldn’t you want someone else to do it?” Mobius frowned, opening it and reading the first page. It was a mission to find a variant hiding out in suburban Ohio. He’d gone to ground after an initial chase and all scans indicated he hadn’t moved on. He was unarmed; a sitting duck.

Mobius was to settle into the community, make friends with the neighbors and report back with intel. That was it.

Ravonna picked up her glass and took a swig. He could feel her eyes on him while he tried to read as much as he could. Flipping the page, he scanned the next sheet and saw a photo of a white picket-fenced home labeled ‘where you will be staying.’

“Will you do it?”

“I haven’t got through all the paperwork but it looks alright,” Mobius agreed, not looking up. He wasn’t sure why he’d been given this mission in place of someone more used to field work—Ravonna must want him out of her hair or something, but this could be an excuse for a free holiday. Maybe it would be fun.

He flipped through some more pages until he reached the last one and there, with their signature smirk and dangerous eyes, was a photo of Loki and a note stating why they would be accompanying Mobius on this mission: they needed a Dom/sub pair.

“No,” Mobius gasped. “You don’t really mean this?”

“You’re compatible. You’ve got the patience to deal with…those more wayward than most, and they’re…eager to explore.”

He picked up his glass and down the contents. A million thoughts rushed through his head. It had been hard not to notice Loki’s stares when they passed by his desk, how they’d deliberately dropped something on the floor near him to make him turn around and look. He’ll never forget the time he found that pink sex toy in his drawer.

Mobius knew Loki was more than just a handful. Bringing them to heel in a prim and proper world where subs stayed at home behaving might be nigh impossible.

“I think you should get someone else.”

“I disagree. You are more than capable. Look how you handle that last case. You kept persevering even when I thought we’d have to give up. You can do this.”

Mobius huffed, feeling hot under the collar. Managing one tough case wasn’t a clear indicator he was going to succeed here, especially when Ravonna didn’t know his secret.

“I still think it’s better…”

“No, you’re going and that’s final.” Ravonna got up and poured herself another drink. “There isn’t anyone else I can send, and I need my best on the job.”

“But I’m…”

“Mobius. I won’t have you continue to downplay your vast experience. You can do this and you will because I said so.”

“Ravonna…”

“No ifs, no buts. You’ve got 2 sleep cycles before you need to go; that’s all I can spare you. Oh, and you’ll need to brief Loki, too. Don’t mess this up.”

Tags under the cut

Tagged by @elodiah @lokimobius @kcscribbler @cha-melodius 💕💕💕💕

Tagging @devilbearingtrouble @doomed-spectacles @thosegayoldmen @mystic-voyager @faux-fm @sparrow-the-tired-lesbian @starrose17 @starport-seven-five @dewdropreader @dreamycloud @insert-witty-user-name-here @mirilyawrites @chaos-monkeyy @blackbirdofasgard @silentxsymphony @illiasha @primewritessmut @stillwanderingflame @in-my-loki-feels @ceeceetv @boredintjqueen @voulezvulcan @rins-love-wins @natendo-art @wolfpup026 @mobius-m-mobius

And if you've clicked to read this and aren't tagged and want to share your WIP, consider yourself tagged

How about no.5 with thomas for blurbs ?

send me a prompt for some oblivious love blurbs ✩ Notes: i changed the word "like" to "love" from the prompt because it suited better idk?

WRONG PLACE, RIGHT TIME ?

Timing was a luxury when it came to the seemingly everlasting battle against WCKD. If anything, it ran askew and unharmonious in adjacent to the nightmares that plagued closing eyes and the terrors that chased outlivers through each and every new day. It was hard to stop and think, let alone feel any emotion other than the will to just purely survive. It was even harder to recognise something that may have been right under your nose, when your focus was instead pulled forward as you looked possible death straight down the barrel of its gun. Thomas huffed; his throat wheezing slightly as he tried to catch his breath, back pressed against the solid structure of a brick wall. Beside him flopped Newt, looking worse for wear, and also stared at by a recently rescued Minho and exhausted Gally. It was bittersweet to watch these boys as they took a small moment to gather themselves - the night had dragged, and even you were feeling the detriments of your extricated mission a little more now that you managed to take a seat. Adrenaline continued to pump through your veins and exercise your heart just that little bit more than you'd deem safe, and it was keeping you focused enough, for now.

Thomas made the first move to rid the WCKD uniform jacket that weighed down his shoulders, the saturated material dripping to the ground before it bled into a haphazardly thrown heap. You followed him quickly until a deep breath filled your lungs with relief, your body no longer constricted nor branded by the threads of your enemy. It was Minho's voice that caught your attention next. Your eyes squinted with confusion, unsure of the words dripping with disbelief as they were spoken towards Newt. And that's when you saw the state of your friend up close, properly, since this break-and-enter mission had begun. Black veins, roots protruding from his arms trailed up his neck. They licked at his cheeks and provoked tired reddened bags to drag at his once soft caramel-toned eyes. They, too, were black as they challenged the night sky in a silent feud for the darkest pitch.

A nearby explosion shook you from your worried state; debris flying overhead, an avalanche of buildings falling to their knees, and Tanks with crazed vengeful men entering the now destroyed streets of the once grand city. It was time to leave, and to get Newt over to Brenda so that he could take the cure. You tuned back into the conversation between the boys in front of you when your name was mentioned - assigned to follow Gally and Minho - a route best leaving you safe. You disagreed, wholeheartedly. "Thomas, I'm not going anywhere without you." You said sternly, brows furrowed as you peered at him. You could see the months of stress integrating into the lines of exhaustion and worry between his eyes; he had driven himself to the ground to protect those that he cared for most, and you weren't going to be any different. He shook his head, "I'm fine. Seriously, you need to go, now -" "-No!" The boy grunted in agitation at your response, lips curled frustratingly before he was quick to grasp your wrist. He gently pulled you aside until his stressed gaze softened almost immediately after looking into your own. Thomas reached for you; fingertips careful as they brushed back loose strands of hair, revealing a cut to your forehead and a trail of dried crimson flakes. He had never been more tender as his thumb rubbed over the wound. "Listen to me. You need to go with them, Y/N. Please. If anything happened to you, I..." Words were lost as his tongue grew heavy, feelings of infatuation trying to break free. He didn't want to make this any harder, in case it was a goodbye. He didn't want to lay his heart on the line, and in the middle of such danger, if it meant the potential for one to shatter. But how could he not when you looked at him with such admiration. Your head shook, tone pleading as you begged, "I'm safest when I'm with you, Tommy. I always have been." He bit his lip, time ticking. You two never had just a moment - a simple, quiet, moment. One between you both where time could stand still. It was overdue but impossible. And you both knew it. The others waited patiently enough to allow a brief spell of privacy, but the air was thick with tension, and another explosion burst the bubble that held you both temporarily captive. Thomas groaned. "No, no you don't get it! I can't let anything happen to you... I-I love you, dammit! I need you to be okay! Out of every-fucking-thing that's happening right now, I need you to be okay! You are so damn reckless sometimes, just for once do what you are fucking told instead of asking for a death wish, I swear - " "Wait, you love me?" Your voice cut through his rant, hand cupping his cheek, and tone so incredibly quiet in contrast to the harshness around you all. "For God's sake - that's all you got from that?" "Guys, I get this is an intimate moment, but we need to get out of here, right now!" Gally called, his persona shrouded in restlessness as he looked over his shoulder. Thomas took one look at you. He did love you, so much. Sometimes it hurt him, and other times, it healed him. And he may never forgive himself if something happened to you, but as he noticed the beauty of mutual love that sprouted from your smile, he knew that he couldn't have you leave. It was hasty, borderline crazy, but Thomas reached for your hand that had warmed his cheek before he kissed your palm. He drew a sharp breath, shaking off any better judgement, "Okay then, just don't ever leave my side." "I promise. Always."

Dear Sgian Dubh,

Thank you answering the anon about my well-being or perhaps just a curious anon who doesn't care. At the same time, thank you for not speculating about my departure, as you diplomatically didn't. It wasn't really newsworthy, after all.

I appreciate the anon's concern, if it was indeed honest, as well as your kind words. Feel free to bin this message, leave it unanswered or publish it without saying a word. I'll leave that decision in your capable hands. As it were, I have no choice in it anyway.

Now, let me address something that surprised me a bit. I must confess that the part about you disagreeing with me on "many things" shocked me, lightly. Despite our completely different upbringing in two different worlds and thousands of miles apart backgrounds, the way I perceived our 'relationship' was more optimistic than yours.

I completely understand that, given that you've doxxed yourself and it is not a part of your nature to use verbal explosives in rebuttals, you would want to distance yourself from my care-free expressions. (Trust me, I have written worse.)

Anyway, I thought we agreed on far more than we didn't. Clearly, I was wrong. Not the first time, I see, lately.

The only thing that puzzles me, though, is that you "personally feel tricked at this game". Why? Because I didn't message you beforehand or didn't announce my departure publically?

As I mentioned repeatedly, I wanted to leave weeks before you appeared. And then I didn't. But only because you have managed to upscale the conversations, the content, and the language of this never ending dialogue. I communicated it openly and repeatedly. I didn't lie either.

Because of my perception of our relationship, I expected a private message instead of a public diplomatic note. Not that I minded - we are all adults here - but I thought you were a closer friend than you felt it. I wasn't aware there were any straws on your camel's back on my account. Ok, maybe one - not being obesity friendly and saying so publically.

Again, no pressure for friendship whatsoever. I'd hate that as much as you would. If it's not there it's not there. I just thought I did better on my chemistry test, so to speak. But then, I always sucked at chemistry at school.

At the same time, I'm not blaming you or anyone else, for that matter, that I felt propelled to slam the door, quietly, without reiterating my desire to refocus on my work and my life vs. commenting on every facet of somebody else's. Although, I'm content I challenged you just a tad.

What triggered it? The pompous jerk did. And then there was that gentle push from you under my stew of a post. But I am genuinely grateful for it. Finally! You did what I should have done weeks ago.

So why did I leave so abruptly? Two words: too much. Too much time spent here on my side and too much toxicity considering I stayed here to relax and have fun. I don't like arguing with online icons. But my camel's back had received multiple last straws long before today. And I stayed despite my intuition.

The atmosphere on my timeline wasn't ideal. Sometimes I felt as if I were visiting a high quality for elderly care institution (by mentioning of which I just managed to offend all grandmas here, in case you do publish it. Great!). Just too much regurgitating of the years old pictures and writing the same comments. I can do it a little but not a lot.

Conversely, I noticed that my comments under other people's posts started disappearing. That's too much high school for me. I'm too old for that. If somebody wants to write some shit I don't like under my posts, I won't clean it up. But we are all different.

Too much confrontation at times instead of a civil discourse. Never with you but you already know that. I admit my part where applicable. Then again, I'm not afraid to state my opinion, risking a shower of opposing opinions, as we've all had the pleasure to witness every now and then.

I appreciate that you consider my leaving a loss for the community. Well, the community has to understand that I have three books to write. And finish. And publish. And market. Community will be fine without me in a day or two. Perhaps, it already is.

Ironically, I enjoy the show(s) more without discussing every square inch of it, the cast, the stupid PR and their cousins. Ouch! I'm awful, I know. But at least you know where you stand with me.

I've simultaneously written to my other two confidants here so they won't feel betrayed, even if we don't owe each other anything. There were honest with me so I will reciprocate. Not because I feel that I have to. I want to. And I'll miss most of you and jay911 (if I remember it correctly), even though he is often quiet. Maybe I'm just too loud to hear him.

Farewell, for now!

Happy Thanksgiving! and Merry Christmas!

Succulently-speaking, finally deactivated with no current plans to use any other account. Just so you know, if case some dumb anon pretends it's me. It won't be.

I have received this very, very long letter from @succulently-speaking-deactivate in the middle of the European night and sat on it, pondering what to do with it.

Since she did not offer any explanation for her abrupt departure from the fandom, I am releasing it in the spirit of fairness that always guided me. You have her own words - not mine.

I have only one thing to add. The words she used to express her frustration and anger (and angst?), in that (in)famous post that is now gone forever, are unacceptable in my book. No matter the person to whom they are directed. It is very sad when things come to this point, but this is her choice and we will have to accept it.

When I became a diplomat, I took a public oath to serve my country (big or small, rich or poor, right or wrong) with dignity and honesty. To those, my heart added grace and empathy. I do not see why things would be different in here, as far as I am concerned.

The Hate and Death Threats Are Uncalled For

Trigger warning: Mentions of suicide. If you are feeling suicidal, please dial 988 or 911 immediately!

DISCLAIMER: If you believe that Chris Evan's "marriage" is PR, then fine. I know it's PR, it's fake, there's a contract involved. If you believe it's real, then fine. I have nothing against you if you believe it's real. I disagree. I think we can find some common ground here.

PR contracts aren't a new thing in Hollywood. They've been around since the beginning of Hollywood, and they'll keep coming out with PR contracts. PR contracts were a way to cover up a star's sexual orientation, which is where fake marriages come into play here. They were legal up until 1965. Liberace was gay. So was Rock Hudson. Katherine Hepburn was a closeted lesbian. All of them were in PR marriages, and under PR contracts. So, this isn't the first time we've had a PR contract, and it's not going to be the last PR contract. They'll still exist even after Chris and the porn troll break up.

A few bloggers on here have been getting hate asks, and death threats. I refuse to name this person, and I refuse to give her the space on my blog. She doesn't deserve the space on my blog, and she doesn't deserve to live in my head rent-free.

There are bloggers wishing death upon Chris. Wishing that he'd drown, kill himself, etc. That's uncalled for! If I didn't like Chris, I wouldn't wish death upon him. That speaks volumes about your character.

These same bloggers have sent hate asks to several people, and have even accused certain bloggers of switching sides. I'm #Team Chris. I haven't changed my stance that this is PR. I was team PR until all of this hate, all of these DM's and all of the bullying started to intensify. Like I said, if you believe that this marriage is real, then fine. As I have stated before, I disagree. I'm still adult enough to let you have your beliefs, and guess what? That's okay! All I want is for Chris to be happy.

Chris looks miserable right now. There's no life in his soul, no life or light in his eyes, he's lost so much weight due to stress. There is little holding him together at this point. This is beyond guilt. He's in this contract, and it's deeper than we think.

This PR stunt will end when it's supposed to end. Chris and the porn troll will break up at some point, and it's not up to us to put out articles because it's not going on OUR timeline. Only two people know when this will end.

Telling someone to off themselves, wish they'd unalive themselves, and even making death threats is uncalled for. There are kids that have committed suicide because they were told to off themselves. There are people sitting in jail on murder charges because they have told a person to do this. You can be arrested for this!

The police can build a case easily because posts on IG, tumblr, facebook, e-mails and texts are time stamped. So, it doesn't take a detective to build a case.

I have lost two people in my life to suicide, and it never gets any easier.

All this hate right now is just uncalled for. I don't care what side you're on, I think both team PR and team real are unhinged. Both sides keep attacking each other over their own personal beliefs, and when someone walks away, or even interacts with someone from the other side, we're accused of switching sides. If you switch sides, fine. I have nothing against you if you do.

I'm Team Chris. There's still good in the man, and we just want to see him happy. He is still a decent human being underneath all this.

"Be excellent to each other."-Bill and Ted

Thanks for coming to my TED talk.

hello! please feel free to ignore this question if it makes you uncomfortable, i totally respect it if this isn’t something you want to talk about or get into.

i’ve been seeing the sentiment that the ISSTD is “corrupt and not to be trusted,” almost always tied to discussion of asserting that recovery of repressed memories isn’t “real” or that ritual abuse “isn’t real.” i’ve also seen folks tie this into accusations of antisemitism on the part of the ISSTD for validating victims of RAMCOA. (i apologize that i do not have screenshots of nor links to these posts so please feel free to take what i say here with a grain of salt, i understand that it’s on me to substantiate my claims and i don’t have anything on hand to do so.)

may i ask what your thoughts or feelings on this are? i only ask because you are clearly extremely well read on this subject in addition to your lived experiences, and i’ve been having a really difficult time just trying to wrestle with it on my own. i genuinely hope my asking you this isn’t disrespectful, and if it is, then i sincerely and deeply apologize and want to reiterate that i respect your right to not answer this or deal with it. i don’t want to be cruel or intrusive to you at all. i would appreciate your insight if you’re able and willing to give it, but if not then i understand completely, and in either case i hope you’re having a good day and i wish you the best. your blog has been very helpful to me in getting a better understanding of all types of disabilities, not just DID, and i’m deeply appreciative of everything you do here.

This isn't disrespectful at all and is a very good question to ask! My answer will be very long because it's complicated.

Specifically the phrasing of "corrupt" for the ISSTD in regards to memory recall and RA stems in large part from TST and Grey Faction wording who launched multiple harassment campaigns against the ISSTD, specific therapists, and individual survivors. In all honesty TST engages in a lot of shock-value and primarily antitheistic politics (eg the "become a Satanist so you can say you have religious reasons for abortion" thing as if actively pairing abortion = Satanist is At All a good idea in a predominantly Christian society), and their primary reason for proposing this is that decades ago, the term used for ALL forms of RAMCOA was "SRA". It was an umbrella term for all forms of extreme abuse (because the first ones to be noticed by the psych field were cult and religious abuse survivors) and was frequently disclaimered as not necessarily being related to cults or Satanism until the various name changes for the abuse type came into play (RA, RAT, severe sadistic abuse, etc). But mainstream society assumes that RA = Satanic cult, in part because of the original usage of the umbrella term, in part because of Satanic Panic, in part because they misunderstand "ritual" as in the occult definition and not "ritual" as in "methodical" in the same way that OCD is described. Either way, TST and Grey Faction jumped on this. Also, it is just kind of weird to me to associate a research journal as having certain collective thoughts and ideologies. They don't. It's a place to submit, publish, and read research papers, and a place to get CE credits if you want to pay extra for that. There are people who know each other and work together sure, but also a lot of them do not know each other and a lot of them disagree with each other. They aren't really much different from any other research journal like The Astronomical Journal.

Recovered memory discourse began for two reasons: 1) when this issue started, which was around when mandatory reporting of abuse became the law in the states, the psych field did not have a protocol for how to handle missing memories or court abuse cases especially where children were involved. This meant that therapists, investigators, and lawyers often used leading questions or asked directly about certain things, and those types of questions are now known to be able to mess with someone's recall (eg, "what were they wearing" vs "was he wearing a blue sweater"). They did this especially due to the time crunch in court cases where they felt they couldn't afford to wait for the memories to come back on their own. 2) abused children who had become adults started suing their parents (successfully) for their child abuse, and this led to the creation of the mostly parent and nonprofessional group False Memory Syndrome Foundation. They did exactly zero science but were very loud about how unfair it was that they were getting sued by their kids, and it led to this becoming a mainstream thought that ended up being researched by others. There is no evidence that FMS is at all true and recovered memory research shows accuracy is actually very high so long as someone remembers it organically and hasn't been manipulated (by accident or on purpose) into it. (Incidentally also why I deeply hate it when people in trauma circles label others' experiences for them)

As far as the antisemitism. In psychology textbooks and papers and so forth: I really, really need people to understand that a psychologist writing down what their patient believes has nothing to do with whether they actually think that's accurate. Outside of the academic texts: I really, really need people to ask themselves why they think groups of people willing to abuse and torture other people as a collective would have progressive, unproblematic worldviews and believe people should have rights. The type of person that devalues others' lives to the point of being able to torture someone else of their own volition is most likely going to have certain views of who is "worthy" of existence and who is "worthy" of having power over others. They will also feed these ideologies to their victims. Whether because they genuinely believe this OR because they are deliberately making sure that if their victims talk, they will not be believed and will just be perceived as crazy. Again, group that tortures people, lying is not exactly going to be taboo to them. Especially when it comes to preventing victims from running away, saying shit like "oh the entire city/the cops/the govt knows we're doing this, they'll just bring you back if you run" is effective at intimidating, creating despair, and causing submission and simultaneously sounds like a conspiracy when a survivor says "the government and all politicians are in on my abuse." They don't even have to be an organized group to pull that, I've seen people with parents or in DV situations where they'll claim they're buddies with cops/judges so you can't report them or they'll threaten to call the cops on their victim. And honestly also: survivors can simply be bigoted. Doesn't mean they were never abused or that they're lying about their abuse just because they exhibit poor behavior or harmful beliefs. Otherwise a lot of the DID community and a lot of people in trauma spaces in general would magically become trauma free.

My stance on this is that I don't surround myself with people who are engaging in harmful behaviors, regardless of their rhymes or reasons for it or whether I can sympathize. This is not limited to bigoted beliefs, but includes things like paranoid beliefs, lashing out frequently, emotional regulation issues in general, people who have no ability to set boundaries, etc. (I am not trying to say bigotry is equivalent to these other behaviors, simply that I do not stop at avoiding bigotry) The cause of behavior can be understood without being tolerated. It is not conducive to my own recovery to do so, particularly because the things they say are often triggering for me as someone who used to have extremely paranoid beliefs that I was fed, as well as my own group having been white supremacist in nature and much of my abuse having a racialized aspect to it. Whether they improve or not does not affect me. I hope they do change and grow, but I do not tie myself to people in the hopes that they'll change. People will only change if they themselves want to.

I hope this is helpful for you.

The way you try to embrace each side while you say you think that’s PR is so annoying. Pick a line and take it. You start each post if it’s pr or in the case of this is real!! You say you think that’s pr, then why do you talk any scenario of being real. It’s not real. You do that to keep team real on your blog too. Hypocrisy is showing! Just saying!

Sorry, but the things you mentioned have nothing to do with each other. Yeah, I do think it's PR, but I don't know if it's PR. Nobody does. Nobody knows whether it's PR or real. The reason I say "if it's PR" is because I don't know for a fact that it is. I mostly use that term when we talk about a debate, or when we theorize about something, and when we consider the "what if it's real" aspect of it too. Me not stating something that I don't have any actual evidence of (I mean the contract here) doesn't mean I didn't pick a lane.

I doubt you know for sure that this is PR, but if you have the contract at hand, feel free to send it to me.

I always stated that even people who think this is real are free to come here and leave me an ask or reach out to me. Just because I think this is not real doesn't mean I'm not interested in other perspectives and other people's opinions.

Would it be better if I said that those who think this is real aren't welcome here? Or if I were name-calling those who don't think the same way I do? Maybe I disagree with them on this being real, but until they express their opinion in a respectful way, they are all welcome here. I know there are people out there who'd like to understand why we think this is not real or just want to see a different POV.

I don't force anybody to be here, and if you think I say everybody is welcome here just to keep people on the blog, then you're really wrong. As I mentioned before, I'm interested in everybody's opinion, but most importantly, I see how some real or PR blogs treat those who don't agree with them, and I don't think that when somebody expresses their opinion in a respectful way, people should answer them in a disrespectful way just because they disagree with them. I just try to be nice; that's it.

You clearly don't know what hypocrisy means. I do really believe this is not real, and I never said that I think this is real or insinuated it. I say it's a possibility, since it is, but I don't think it's real. I'm not going to state that I know something for a fact when I don't.

And I don't start every single post with "if it's PR." Just saying!

Blorbie something I’ve noticed is that a lot of fics with Nico include lines in reference to him having “perfectly manicured nails” and just various remakes along those lines but as someone who has been a fan since like 2013 this definitely feels like a big misconception/assumption because in most of the close up photos I’ve seen of Nico’s hands his nails have in fact not been perfect or manicured at all and I’m almost certain I read once him saying he bites his nails. I tried to find it because I’m sure I’ve not made that up but I sadly couldn’t. So much of being a Nico fan is learning to ignore mischaracterisation because it’s just easier but him being a nail biter is 100% canon to me and his uncharacteristically untidy nails make total sense (and reminds me of a fic I vaguely remember reading years ago all about him having an oral fixation 🙃)

And yes, before you ask, I clearly do have too much time on my hands if this is what I’m busy thinking about…

haha hi anon. I'm gonna answer your question from the perspective of a fic writer. If I include the phrase "perfectly manicured nails" it doesn't mean I'm stating an objective fact like nico is blonde. rather im trying to convey something about the character. I don't think the writers have actually zoomed in on Nico's fingernail pictures to check.

so where does this perception of perfectly manicured nails come from? what does it signify? well, Nico's most documented and well known year is 2016, it's what he is most strongly associated with. And 2016 nico was highly neurotic, regimented, type A. He needed exactly 8 hours of sleep regardless of the timezone to beat jetlag, he had a really strict diet, exercise plans, etc. when an author goes out of their way to mention perfectly manicured nails, they're signifying that nico is someone meticulous, tidy, metrosexual, aware of his image and how the world sees him and cares about it.

it's important to remember this is fanon nico, fan interpretation of canon as is the case in rpf we can never truly Know the actual person, just their public persona. the biggest difference in fanon and canon nico for me was the video where nico was on a yacht with his friends and he found out his dad's team won the DTM championshipship. so he just books a flight on his phone, doesn't even pack a suitcase or get off the yacht, asks his camera guy if he can travel and then he heads straight to the airport. in his yachting shorts! and shows up to his dad's party. this goes against the perfectly polished idea of fanon nico, who is always scheming and prepared and would've had this flight and his suitcase packed in preparation, while irl nico is rich boy idgaf. even vivian comments "he always does this" at nico randomly booking a flight In The Middle Of Their Yacht Trip 😭

here's the link to the video, it's honestly a really fun watch:

anyways I hope this explains why the fics "mischaracterise" him, in order to write him in a certain way that's more interesting to the writer -- and you are free to disagree with it. I myself don't agree w/ a lot of popular nico tropes (the jilted ex to sewis for example), but that's why I read the fics I enjoy or write my own

Polyamory Can't Come From Cheating

From: https://polyamorousmisanthrope.com/wordpress/2017/05/14/polyamory-cant-come-from-cheating/

I’ve been getting several letters that look like this lately:

Dear Polyamorous Misanthrope,

My husband has had an affair and now wants to have a polyamorous relationship.  She is pregnant, and wants him to live with her.  How do I get over my jealousy and stop being so inadequate as a wife?

Any poly person who says that being angry at being mistreated is a symptom of inadequacy or that being jealous is somehow a personal failing isn’t someone you need to listen to at all.

Cheating and Polyamory

I’ve got some advice for both sides of the coin here.   Maybe you’ve cheated on your partner and want to be openly poly.  Maybe you’ve had a partner cheat on you and then decide poly is the thing to do.  In both cases, I’ve got some less than pleasant things to say.

If You are the Cheater

To repeat to the people who have cheated and think polyamory is going to be their Get out of Jail Free card, please understand that polyamory does not work if you are:

Lying to your partner.

Insensitive to your partner’s needs and desires.

Breaking agreements.

Expecting your partner to be convenient.

If you have cheated and want to save your marriage, you are going to need to earn back your spouse’s trust.  That is almost certainly not possible while still being involved with the person you’re cheating with.  It may not be possible at all.

If You are Being Cheated On

If have been cheated on and are being told that you’re to blame because of your “insecurities…”

You are being gaslighted.

Everyone’s behavior is always their very own fault.  If you slap your partner for cheating on you, you’re being abusive.  Your partner didn’t make you do it.  If your partner says you were too stifling and that’s why the cheating happened, the partner is still lying and breaking agreements. You didn’t make them do it.

Maybe you are insecure and need to work on that.  Fair enough.  Still not an excuse for breaking agreements.  The only ethical options available are re-negotiating the agreements or breaking the relationship off.

What Good Relationships Look Like

I’m not trying to paint relationships as throw-away things, by the way.  My shortest current relationship is celebrating its ten-year anniversary this summer.  The relationships I have survive happily because of three things that are really important:

We genuinely care about each other’s feelings.

I had a Bad Thing happen to me recently and the pain of it will hit me at odd moments.  The last time FWB visited, let’s just say I wasn’t feeling all that sexy.  He understood that and was fine with cuddling.  Do I realize and like… care about the fact that he might have felt disappointed?  Yep.  Very much so.  The point is that in good partnerships, there is mutual compassion. 

I cannot overstate the fact that in a good relationship, the mutuality of care is crucial.  You cannot abnegate yourself to earn the cookies of being cared about, though.  If it’s not mutual, if it’s a one-way street, you are genuinely better off without that relationship.  Love, deep down, is really what it’s all about.  I say it over and over and over again.  Without love, forget it.

We are honest with each other.

This has to be the most important part of the whole thing.  My husband and I really did nearly divorce because of a lack of honesty in communication.  We learned to be honest about what we wanted to do or not, and never to agree to something we didn’t want.  We found that where we disagreed, because we knew there were no hidden agendas, workarounds could easily be found that everyone could deal with happily. (Were that not so, we would have parted).

We recognize duty exists in relationships

Duty is not a popular word and I have been in relationships that eyeroll duty.  Never, ever again.  It is my duty to be honest about what I think and feel as well as volunteer my emotional state.  It is my duty to do what I say I am going to do.  It is my duty to tell my partner if my feelings have changed and I want something else.

I do not consent to relationships in which people do not feel the same way about the paragraph above.

This makes it sound all harsh and cold and no fun, which is, I am sure, why the word has fallen out of popularity.  But that’s not what my life looks like.  It feels secure and comfortable.  I know my partners will not grudgingly stay with me if they are unhappy.  I know they’re in my life because they want to be. 

I recommend a few articles, though, if you are dealing with a partner who has cheated on you, and you’re trying to decide what to do in the face of it.  Yes, this is stuff I’ve written, but I think it’s important.

Boundaries

How to Rebuild Trust

Vetos (Hint:  Hate ‘em and think they’re crap for learning appropriate boundaries)

The Emotional Bank Account

Did you see a certain someone deleted her instagram account? Why do that if you’ve got nothing to hide?

Hello Anon thank you for the ask. Yes, I did see she truly temporarily deactivated her account for a few hours last week. I see you sent this ask in last week about an hour after I myself was told by someone that her profile can't be found (and I myself couldn't either). At first glance with the last post she created, it sounds like she decided to leave her account up but to consider it deactivated. She claimed she will only leave her IG up so people can read that post and left a few other posts up. The post also claims she showed up to her makeover that day crying from all of the Megyn Kelly statement and following criticism of her looks. However, upon closer inspection, assuming the "after" photo Megyn used in talking about the said plastic surgeries she's had, it is in fact from the day she got that same makeover with the heavy contouring. This to me implies she was upset about other things before she got this makeover. "I got my makeup done that day and it involves major contouring and I remember leaving and feeling pretty. And even that day was an immensely stressful day for me. I came running to these girls and I showed up in tears after what happened that day and I left feeling better because I felt like they had reduced my lack of sleep and worked their magic wands. I saw the comments, scathing enough to just turn off my comments." For reference, here is the video clip where Megyn Kelly made the remarks alleging Erin has had some work done.

Also earlier in this same post she stated "I had no idea what was going on, to be honest, because I've had one of the most challenging weeks of my life". She certainly implied there were other things going on that week prior to people making more criticisms over her looks. As for what upset her before the makeover, I believe that based on a post I saw about a couple weeks or so ago in her story, her new puppy got sick as at least part of why she was upset and sleep deprived. In 2 of 3 bullet points in this story, she said f*ck you to people who don't clean up after their dogs. I unfortunately don't have the screenshot of this, as I recently cleared my phone out some.

Now, as for whether Megyn was lying or not.... Just a couple days ago Daily Mail wrote an article showing her walking her dogs with a "natural complexion" (which I by the way disagree with the author that she was makeup free here). This last post of hers stated what Megyn said was false news. Looking at the most recent photos of her from that Daily Mail story and then also some from just a few months ago, I do notice quite a bit of a difference between her looks as of a couple weeks ago versus a few months ago. Whether she simply lost a lot of weight from stress or if she really doesn't want to admit she's had work done is up to you to decide. One cannot deny that she looks a good bit different from how she did 10 years ago. I believe it can logically be said that Megyn's remarks simply are what made the water boil over. I will certainly say this too. I saw some of the comments on her last post and one user made a good point: deleting all of her most recent photos off her Instagram certainly helps her case none whatsoever, and in my opinion just fueled the fire even more.

She has a very interesting history when it comes to her social media page and the posts she makes, deleting posts, clearing out pages she follows, etc. I know at one point based on what her Socialblade analysis said, she removed 68 posts and unfollowed 207 out of 605 pages sometime between 9/25 and 9/28 from her profile (talk about scrubbing). I remember a post she made on 1/18 that said "your “wyd” hour is my “sit back & watch the red flags fly” hour" she deleted on 1/23. Again, I removed some of my screenshots from my phone and didn't capture it on my desktop but it still shows up in Google searches as seen in the link above so it did once exist.

And no, not everything shows up on archive websites as this article here discusses particularly with Instagram having more strict privacy policies and sometimes Instagram will straight up deny permission to archive posts to archiving software and websites, such as Wayback Machine.

When she reactivated her profile, she went from having 194 media to just now 11. Of course, she's also deleted other posts she's made in the past usually within a few weeks after made but during her last scrubbing she removed some that were more than a year old.

She's also turned off comments on her posts multiple times in the past. As for why she does not have a social media manager, I couldn't say for sure (although some have said in the past she doesn't have the means to hire one). It's also interesting to note that she followed 1 new page yesterday on her so called "deactivated" Instagram account. As the Daily Mail author of their latest story on her appearing in LA walking her dogs said, she was clearly glued to her phone when she was out. I would say she made it a point to be seen "makeup free" by the paparazzi after what Megyn said about her but that's just me speculating...

I say this with respect and out of concern for her well-being. As someone who has educational and work background in healthcare and even psychology, I have reasons to believe that she has some mental health issues she needs to get addressed and that's 100% okay. Anyone who says they don't have something going on in this crazy world is frankly a liar. However, I definitely do think that she had a very dramatic reaction to Megyn Kelly's statements about her. She could've simply pointed out how Megyn used a decade old photo but incorrectly calling it a year old. This would've effectively made Megyn Kelly look like an idiot and could've just left it at that. Deleting all of her most recent photos merely fueled the fire in my opinion as I said earlier in this post.

I believe she made this last post/public statement to Megyn Kelly as a cry for help and yes in that, for attention. She made another story late last night that says thank you to the people who are sharing their stories and that she wants to hear what others have to say. She's probably a very sweet girl like those who have met her at conventions have said but fact is, she is certainly very sensitive and I question if her skin is thick enough to last in the entertainment industry. Time will tell of course but the reality is, no matter who you are in the show biz people will always have unrealistic expectations of your looks and you will always have critics (some more than others).

Thank you for the ask Anon.

This is random, but I finally got to watch the full d-day concert!!! (i was honestly super disappointed as a european fan that I couldn’t see him live 😭) And Yoongi is so amazing, he was thriving during this tour!

But I wanted your opinion on the lyrics of haegeum? Because I feel a bit crazy, but I’m 99% sure I hear him say “slaves to youtube, slaves to sex” instead of “flexing”? Am I the only one who hears that? If I hear it right, props to him! It’s rare to hear anyone say the word “sex” (I know “sexy” is said all the time by the members haha, but that’s a different thing)

Literally “liberating yourself from banned things” 👏

(Reminds me of when Hoseok wore the condom shirt - I’m actually looking forward to post-military times when they may take more freedom to show more mature sides of themselves honestly instead of placating “fans”.)

When I apologize for letting asks sit in my inbox for freaking ever, this is a good example in case anyone was wondering how old some of my asks are lol. I'm so sorry anon!! But I'm here now! I'm relaxing this morning before my part 2 date this evening and going to do that while gushing about Yoongis genius!

How many times can I make everyone watch Yoongi perform before talking about it? 😏😂

Okay well first, I'll say that I do hear slaves to flexing and not sex. Lol but that also would've been quite the line and I can see where maybe it could sound like that, but I disagree there. And the lyrics also say flexing. So I think that's pretty open and shut.

Second, I too, am enjoying the solo era where they are a little bit more free with who they are as people and individuals and how they've approached things lately. I'm throughly looking forward to seeing this energy continue but as a group too!

And finally! My thoughts over Haegeum:

Literally it means to allow/unlock something that is forbidden or to lift a ban on something that is forbidden. The main "theme" of the song centers around this idea and these controversies that spread through free speech. I personally think Yoongi is liberating himself from the "forbidden." Rejecting the state of the world and the stereotypes constantly forced upon him from people who don't even really know him.

He specifically points out a scene of him smoking, something normally very looked down upon for idols like himself, something that members of BTS have actively received hate/criticism on, but he rejects things that are forbidden for him and he embraces this new style and era he is crafting for himself.

He pointed out being essentially tired of and gives criticism of this "information age" we are living in currently. With information accessible at the drop of a hat, literally constantly at our fingertips, people are just regurgitating someone else's thoughts and opinions rather than engaging in critical thinking and coming up with their own.

(no hate to anon truly, this is not really directed at you, but it's a lot like how a lot of anons on my blog want me to give them their thoughts and opinions about Jikook moments and explain it all rather than finding their own opinions about it)

I think he also relates to this information age as something that restricts us not only in critical thought. But also how it's constantly forcing people into purposeless debate and controversy online. An overflow of information from everyone, most of which is also opinion and not fact, can make it HARDER for people to think for themselves, figure out what they believe and engage fully and factually.

He points out and questions why we are so bound to money, validation, hatred and prejudice. Why we allow these things to shape who we are and how we think. It's like we are living in a society that almost encourages that too.

I think he wants this song to encourage hope. Encourage a future where we reject these things, reject what holds us back, reject the idea that free speech doesn't mean freedom from consequences or freedom to be hateful. Reject the idea that we need to live for validation and instead live for a better and kinder future. Where we speak for what we believe in and not just spew hatred and prejudice and half baked opinions based off what someone else says, where we don't create senseless discourse or create baseless complaints and debates.

Yoongi, I think, hopes for a future, a better age, where it's more based in realism and a people with less superficial tendencies and desires. And in my opinion, a healthier world that would be.

And all this is literally just my thoughts based on the lyrics! We didn't even get into the trilogy together, the possibilities of colors used, an MV analysis, the visual architecture.... The man does everything with a purpose!! We could get into that more too if people want

I highly encourage watching all his behind the scene stuff for more of his thoughts and his process. Yoongi is and always will be my bias because of the way he thinks and the way he processes stuff and the way he writes and puts those things out into the world. I also relate so much to him.

Things I miss about old tv shows:

1. Set Designs

One thing I miss most is actual tangible set designs. There used to be a handful of sets that would get used time and time again, and the characters actually interacted with them. Sets now look so damn clinical and clean, characters barely interact with them (mostly because half of all sets are almost entirely CGI) and they barely change over the course of a season or episode. Reflect your characters’ mental states by their rooms. Make them messy, dirty, have characters comment on the state of certain sets. Come on make them UNIQUE. And not in the way of just the objects either, make them unkempt or overflowed and mix up the lighting a bit.

2. Actual Episodic Structure

Most TV shows I’ve watched that came out in the last few years have had a continuous plot. Which is great. It makes me invested in the story, makes me excited for the next episode. But unless done correctly, it can feel like nothing was actually achieved in those episodes. Often it comes that a character spends the entire episode trying to do something, only for their plan to unravel right at the end of the episode and the next episode to be set up. It makes me feel like nothing was actually completed. Every episode is designed to set up for the next one and in some cases this works, but in others it doesn’t. An episodic structure is where each episode has its own individual storyline that may or may not add to the overall plot. Avatar: The Last Airbender used this structure, as did the Star Trek series (excluding season 2~ of Discovery) and BBC Merlin. A structure like this adds considerably more to character development and subsequent relationships between characters before moving on to more plot-driven antics, which in turn raises the stakes.

3. Fantasy Lighting

This, I believe, is self-describing. TV shows are too dark. I can’t see. Even if you want to establish how dark a setting is, there is still usually a source of light that a character is holding. It’s enough to make us actually see what’s going on, so let us. Please. And, anyway, it’s fiction. Doesn’t have to always be 100% realistic.

4. Filler Episodes

This comes in tandem with episode numbers. I do understand that in production the creators don’t have much time to film and edit before release. But. Where did the 20 episode seasons go? A lot of series are being released half-and-half, but even if it’s weekly, most people I know would be fine with it as long as each episode is produced to the best of the ability of the creators. I also miss fillers. Give me those character shenanigans. No plot, just pure antics. Those episodes keep me alive.

4. CGI Consistency

I will always maintain the opinion that good CGI relies on how consistent its quality is throughout a film, season or episode. Personally, I don’t care how good the CGI is so long as it remains relatively the same level throughout what I’m watching. I see this a lot in recent tv shows *cough* marvel *cough* where one scene will have the most spectacular CGI ever seen and another looks more like a low-budget animated kids show. It breaks immersion. I’m not into it. Just give me bad CGI all the way through. Or, on contrast, no CGI whatsoever. Construct scenes using actual corporeal sets and makeup. I miss funky little puppets.

(Note: this is opinion based. Feel free to agree or disagree, add or remove. I won’t contend)

Good day/evening!

Sorry for the long post, but I was wondering what your opinion is on whether BSD is critical about law enforcement? I saw people on twt saying that BSD is a story that is critical abt the government, and that the Hunting Dogs (especially Jouno) proves Asagiri has criticisms of police.

But personally I disagree since BSD also has positive depictions of police, like Ranpo's friend. And a major plot point was relying on 'good officers' to turn against the 'bad ones' when it comes to believing the ADA. There's also the way the ADA is also a law enforcement agency (albeit a privately owned one). And the way Fukuchi is an antagonist not because he is a member of the military but instead secretly a terrorist. Jouno explicitly bringing up police brutality is probably the best evidence that bsd is critical of police, but it's also the same chapter where he fought against the real antagonist Fukuchi, sort of giving him a redemption (and also Tetcho saying Jouno is actually good)

I guess I'm cynical about whether BSD is really as critical as people believe. But I liked your previous posts on BSD's treatment of female characters and nationalism, so I wanted to hear your thoughts on this too

Have a great day!

Hello, thank you for your question! I need to preface this by saying that I'm not an expert on the subject, so please forgive me - and feel free to correct me - if anything I say is misguided by possible misconceptions I may have internalized.

For the most part, Anon, I must agree with you. The first time I read the take about bsd beingcritical of police brutality - if I remember correctly, it was from a screenshot from Twitter that made some rounds here when chapter 100.5 was released -, I thought it was a huge case of erroneous recontextualization. Very likely, it was coming from an usamerican person projecting a very usamerican issue to a book that is not american, nor destined to an american audience, nor intended to make of american issues its focus. Not saying police brutality is a phenomenon exclusive to the usa, but, as far as my limited knowledge goes, it definitely isn't in Japan to an extent that goes close to what it's like in the usa (it's also a phenomenon deeply rooted in a kind of racism Japan simply wouldn't have the chance to know, because Japanese society doesn't know the kind of multiethnicism that is present in the usa).

I don't think bsd is, at least intentionally, critical of any police or military structure. You already pointed all the most relevant arguments on why it isn't: most police officers are usually framed sympathetically (hell, even when they are criminals they're framed sympathetically, see chapter 6 (although there the criminal being an officer was more of a coincidence than anything) ), a good chunk of police is supporting the main cast by now, and even the part that isn't isn't doing so because they're police specifically, but rather because the whole world think they're terrorists due to reality-rewriting powers of this magic book™. About the Hunting Dogs, at first they were introduced in a mostly villainous light; but, now that we got to know them, they hardly use as critic of military police. Tetchou is undoubtedly honourable and just. Teruko has been established to always be putting civilians safety before anything (chapter 75), and it's also stated that despite her methods she helped drastically decrease criminality (can't remember where for the love of me but it's there somewhere). Tachihara has always been a character that is vastly sympathetic to the audience, and by now his loyalty doesn't even lie with the government anymore so I don't think I need to get to him. About Jouno, I think a point was made even before his redemption: Jouno is not military. I mean, he may wear the uniform, but as stated in chapter 93 he was recluted by Fukuchi appositely because he was a criminal, and he was never supposed to become a rightful paladin; the fact that he ended up being one is but a mere unintentional coincidence, and even then he isn't there to be representative of military police, nor is his sadism. I'm not counting Fukuchi as military because his loyalty clearly belongs to the cause / the doa, but let's take a moment to acknowledge how ironic it is that he's also the only character who openly crticicizes the military system, and he's the big villain.

I don't think bsd is critical of law enforcement or government (Special Division for Unusual Powers is framed positively and, as you mentioned, the ada itself is an organization affiliate to the government); if anything, I think the military and police systems in bsd are once again expressions of bsd's main core, that there's nothing completely good or completely bad, and just like people constantly oscillate between the two, law enforcement structures also have both valorous and corrupt members in their ranks.

Also like, peoples, bsd is kinda right wing, and right wing is historically very close and supportive of military circles (see, for example, how fascism goes hand in hand with military imaginary). The biggest enemy of the biggest arc in bsd so far is literally an anarchist who among other things vastly criticizes the military system, so take that as you will. I feel like the overall implicit take away of this arc will be “it's true that law enforcement agencies do horrible things, but we must accept it because it's necessary to mantain peace and stability”, but feel free to disagree with me on this.

How do you realistically speak up for yourself especially to like strangers or people who are close but not close close to you🖤...& thank you girl

Hi love! Great question. Here are my tips on how to stick up for yourself and hold your own, especially in situations where you don't want to be too vulnerable (like with second-tier friends or acquaintances as you suggested above):

Ask for permission to bring up a conflict: Allow the other person to consent to a less comfortable conversation. Depending on the situation, feel free to assertively ask: "X statement made me uncomfortable/offended. Can we discuss this topic/how I'm feeling for a moment?" If someone is overstepping a boundary/trying to push your limits, just say: "Hey, that statement/action crossed X boundary. I [insert boundary]. If X boundary is crossed again, I'll need to remove myself from this conversation/leave/hang up/etc. "

Always approach conflict with "I" statements: Make standing up for yourself about just that – standing up for YOURSELF. Share how you feel and why certain behaviors make you feel comfortable. Don't use language that leads with a "you" statement. Make the conversation about asserting your own needs, not the other person's actions – this will only escalate a conflict and make someone else feel attacked.

Guide your conversations using someone's behaviors/actions, and never attack someone's character during a conflict or a disagreeable conversation: (e.g. Say something like "When you say things about X group of people or topic, I get very uncomfortable or angry." You can elaborate with a reason if you feel it's necessary, but your feelings are complete and valid on their own. Don't say: "You're a close-minded/rude/unappreciative person, etc," even if you have their past actions to back this statement up. It's not a good look.)

Seek to understand, not win in conversations: Unless the person, is hostile or deliberately trying to provoke you/upset you, listen to the other person to understand their perspective before speaking. Ask them why they said an uncomfortable/offensive statement or did a certain action that left you with negative emotions. Seeing where the other person is coming from helps you better communicate with the person in the context of the situation and minimizes the chances of a conflict. In the worst-case scenario, entering these less comfortable conversations with this intention will make you appear as a mature and respected person – both to yourself and others – and keeps you in a calmer state, so you're more careful with your words and less likely to say something you regret.

Hope this helps xx