#if god was here right now I'd sucker punch him | Explore Tumblr Posts and Blogs

ritz-writes · 6 months

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@asleepyy so sorry for tagging u twice in one day and i hope im not bothering u with my brain rot 😅

but yes, i did actually dissect the lyrics. yes, i am actually insane. and yes, i love this au quite a lot.

here are my notes and what i think each song represents, tho its mainly just the vibes i get. i made notes as i listened to them (note: i see songs almost always in animatic form. idk if that will effect how i imagine what each song means, but i thought it might be worth mentioning)

join me as i lose my mind over the course of an hour and a half

say what you think: def making me think of them both in heaven and jophiel wanting to ask questions.

running up that hill: AHH this one hurt. very obvious as well. jophiel seeing that azazel shouldnt be a demon. "And if I only could I'd make a deal with God, and I'd get Him to swap our places." i am sobbingggg

what difference does it make?: at first i was going to say its jophiel wanting to figure out what went wrong but azazel makes them promise not to, but i think its better suited for azazel understanding hes a demon, but he cant help but still have faith in the almighty

please please please let me get what i want: fuckkk is this about azazel being a demon but still wanting to do good 😭 short but still painful

ever fallen in love (with someone you shouldn't've): my first reaction to the title alone was like the second image of the kambucha girl meme. anyway i think this one is about them becoming friends (or more?? 👀) but knowing its seen as wrong. "And if I start a commotion, I run the risk of losing you and that's worse" makes me also think of jophiel talking to the metatron and realizing he shouldnt ask about azazel lest he risk the poor thing being smited.

nothing critical: ohhhh this one gives hella vibes of jophiel not trusting heaven and knowing "something isnt right here" in regards to the fall-- HOLD UP "I know, someone had to go, If not him it'd be me instead" HELLO??? aziraphale asking for jophiel??? is this like after he finds out what azazels name used to be??

flowers never bend with the rainfall: hmm... i feel like this is a plot point song. not sure why. but "And I hide behind the shield of my illusion" makes me think it pertains to azazel

bird in space: oh this ones a bit tricky. i think ive reached the songs that no longer fit the lore we've been given thus far. so the only thing i can think rn is jophiel enjoying earthly pleasures? not rlly sure

angel, won't you call me?: oh fuckkk is this about a fight they have? "I fled at the face of my rival. When I felt his breath at the back of my neck. Angel, won't you call?" theres no way that isnt about azazel saying smth and then leaving, only to be scared he severed his tie to the only person thats been nice to him.

the stranger: first of this is a bop and im loving it. very groovy. the first thing that comes to mind is the "choose your faces wisely" prophecy. ooo is this about jophiel trying to convince azazel hes still meant to be an angel? that he wasnt meant to fall? also, the last verse is sticking out to me... not sure why

all i think about now: fuckkkkk this is giving me the vibes of jophiel finding out azazel Fell cuz of him and feeling guilty about it. "If I'm late, can I thank you now?" FUCKING OW?? oh yeah for sure this is about jophiel finding out and being sucker punched with guilt

ill be your mirror: oh goddd this song. i know crowley listens to this song but i cant remember what its about so lets see. AH SHIT YEAH THATS RIGHT. okay so jophiel reminds azazel that he is inherently good, regardless of if hes a demon. thats what im getting from this (also just tihnking of that ask i sent about the reflective sunglasses bthwjegkrw)

me and my husband: okay all im getting from this is "they r down bad". they r very very very much in love. getting vibes of this being after they stop the apocolypse. or maybe their feelings developing thru the centuries

time in a bottle: oh man this song always gets me. okay so, this and the last song r giving the oh-shit-i-might-be-in-love vibes. but this one is with jophiel's pov, while me and my husband is azazel's

ritz note: the last couple songs have been cute and lovey and i am now terrified of what the next ones r gonna be. cuz i know this fandom. and i am not ready for the pain. i am afraidddd

lonesome town: i fucking called it i knew the happy wouldnt last 😭😭 they had a fight didnt they. yeahhh they had a fight. FUCK why is this so sad but so pretty

across the universe: is this one sad too??? hang on theres a bit thats not in english, what does that mean... "Hail to the Heavenly Teacher." okay so i assume this is an azazel song. this is just making me think of the bookshop fire, but its azazel thinking jophiel died 😭 ....i am staring at the lyircs. i am glaring at the lyrics. this song MEANS something. i just dont know what. but its important. im squinting at it very hard (note: i came back to this song and am STILL glaring at it. its like. its like im seeing it covered in sand but i know theres gold underneath. i cant SEE the gold, but i know its there. this is driving me nuts /pos)

no wonder i: hm.. im not rlly sure with this one. OH?? is this azazel finding out heaven isnt that good?? "Suddenly I'm not so sure. That intentions can be pure." hmmmmmmm

what do they know?: holy shit okay this is a completely different kind of song than the others. im.... glaring at these lyrics too. feels like a plot point but cant tell what it is. i think its about jophiel? maybe heaven too?? idk im grasping at straws with this one

sea of love: oh yay a happy song again 😌 okay this is just short and sweet. gives me forgiveness and/or confession vibes.

who are you, really?: this one sounds important and i am glaring!! makes me think of "we dont need heaven we dont need hell" and also "a demon/angel that goes along with hell/heaven as far as he can". also just makes me think of jophiel speaking.

the moon will sing: i fucking love this song but i dont think ive ever looked at the lyrics so lets goooo. right away i see "I could have been anyone, anyone else. Before you made the choice for me" and think of aziraphale asking and falling for jophiel, and in a way making the choice of jophiel staying an angel. "Instead, I made a bed with apathy" jophiel trying not to care about a random demon. "I shine only with the light you gave me" jophiel giving azazel ideas on how to do "good" while being "bad". also with that line, thinking of azazel saying that to god and being sad about having fallen AUGHH i have a whole animatic in my head with this song and im losing my mind

matephor: hnnnn another important sounding song. jophiel vibes. fight song perhaps?? "Don't look too hard 'cause you won't like the scars he left in me" azazel vibes??? this one is elusive to me but i love it. okay im slowly getting more azazel vibes. like azazel trying to convince jophiel that he is a demon and fell for a reason

providence: right away getting "heaven and hell r bad" vibes. OHH okay okay this is giving me hella jophiel vibes, but specificly snarky and sassy jophiel vibes. of being like "oh yes heaven is oh so great, we kill children! but its for the greater good, of course. gotta beat hell and all that, even at the cost of innocents. all for the almighty and her ineffable plan." (this song is a bop omg)

earth angel: oh i know this one but only with crowley and aziraphale, so im excited to listen to it with an oopsie omens mind set. omg wait why does it hit HARDER. love sick azazel is such a cute image 🥺🥰

what more can i do: hmm.. them being in love but knowing its "forbidden"? cant tell who i imagine with it more

starman: this is just them. classic good omens song, regardless of the au. love to see it 💖

a pearl: AH FUCK ANOTHER SAD ONE. mitski whyy. hm.. azazel song? jophiel?? i think jophiel... tho my mind might be turning to mush at this point so im not sure. one of them is sad

duvet: oh def azazel vibes. oh maybe some jophiel vibes too?? i can see it swaping povs. i think it fits azazel more tho.

ritz note: OKAY the next song is in a different language and for a split second i legit thought i was having a stroke when i pulled up the lyrics ngl bgkewrrkjq

différent de toi: no idea what this song is about but its pretty 😊

oh thats all of them! i think the first half is more coherent observations, while the second half is just... rambling a bit lmao. idk if any of this makes sense. i might also be looking for things that arent there with these songs, but oh well. this was fun!

and now, after looking back at them all, i really does just slowly derail near the end lmao

#kinda hesitant to post this #but i think i put too much work into it not to so #here we go <3 #good omens #good omens au #ritz rambles #long post

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kraekat29 · 2 years

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Chapter One

I stood up and wiped the blood from the corner of my mouth- geez feeding could get messy.

I felt bad for what I did to the deer so I took a flower and laid it on the body, a silent thank you for letting me feed.

JJ seemed amused by it, of course I'd be the only guilty vampire for feeding, but I was an animal lover.

I went over to him and smiled as he pulled me into his arms, every touch felt electric, even better than before.

His scent was intoxicating, I suddenly understood why it was so hard for him to be around me, if a vampire smelled this good then a human had to be worse.

I leaned up and kissed his cheek before turning to go back to his house, I wanted to see my kids.

~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~

Finally we got there and I was ready to go in but Rafe came out, “ you’re still here?” I asked and him and JJ shared a look, “ yeah.. and so are you “ he said and I leaned closer into JJ, “ I wasn’t expecting you to look, so.. you” he said and I smiled.

Something was off, Rafe obviously didn’t want me to go inside, “ wait uh- let’s see if you can handle me first “ Rafe said and my smile dropped, “ um okay..” I said and took a hesitant step forward, I inhaled and wrinkled my nose, “ god now I understand what everyone’s been saying. Rafe you really do stink” I said and moved past him.

As soon as I went inside I was overwhelmed by all the scents and scrunched my nose, this was all a bit overwhelming at once.

Only two scents stood out in particular, I could hear their heartbeats and followed the sound, “ here they are..” Sage said and handed them to me.

I felt my mouth water but it all stopped once I looked down at them, they were beautiful and they were mine- only they didn’t look like they were just born, they looked a few months old, “how long was I out?” I asked, “ it’s only been three days” JJ said but I didn’t take my eyes off of them, “ their growth is concerning, I’ve never seen anything like this” Heyward said and I tried to block it out.

Dallas reached up and touched my cheek, any anxiety went away, “ what was that?” I asked, “ they’re both gifted. Dallas can do emotions like Pope and Delilah can do Elements” Sage explained.

I held them closer but suddenly Rafe took them away from me, “ I think that’s enough experimentation for one day” he said and I glared at him, “ what is your problem? They’re my kids” I growled, watching as he took a step back.

JJ came up and hugged me from behind but I tensed, “ JJ back up.. I don’t wanna hurt you..” I warned and felt him kiss my temple before moving away, “ you should be thanking me “ Rafe said , “ for what” I hissed and he made an uncomfortable noise, “ Ruby- you know it’s a wolf thing..” he said and I could feel the anger radiating off me.

I took a step forward, “ what’s a wolf thing” I growled, “ look- it’s temporary I only did it to protect-“ he barely got out before I grabbed him by the neck and dragging him outside.

I threw him onto to the ground, “ you imprinted on my children?! They’re only infants! I’ve held them one time Rafe! One time! And already you think you have some sort of wolfy claim on them?! They’re mine!” I roared and sucker punched him in the jaw, sending him flying across the lawn.

I was shaking from my anger, I didn’t want Rafe to have any parts with my kids and now he temporarily imprinted? I’m sure I’d be thankful but right now the rage was consuming me.

All it took was one look from Rafe and suddenly I was pouncing him, he should’ve known better than to be involved with my kids.

I didn’t even register everyone else telling me stop, I just kept punching, getting annoyed with how quick he healed.

Once I was satisfied I stepped away, the rage had finally died out, “ stay away from them.” I warned, “ I can’t..” he said and I shot him a glare, “ one year Ruby. That’s all you have me for, one year “ he said, “ one year and that’s it” I growled and went inside.

I knew I was being cruel but Rafe didn’t like vampires, how could I trust him around my children? My mom instinct was on overdrive.

I turned as JJ came in and I gave him an apologetic smile, I knew he didn’t blame me for how I’d acted, I’m sure he acted the same when he found out.

He cupped my cheek and rested his forehead against mine, silently telling me that everything was okay.

I believed him.

#jj maybank #ruby routledge #jj maybank smut #john b routledge #kiara carrera #pope heyward #obx fic #outer banks

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spunsugarmusings · 2 years

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Old Man Henderson (The Director's Cut) Starter Sentences: Part 3

"Maybe if you didn't burn down everything, we'd have more to work with."

"We wave a scorched earth sorta war here, kid."

"The Hell's an internet?"

"Sadly, google had zero results under "gorram poodle fuckin' cultists"."

"Dude, I fucked a shoggoth and you're creeping me out."

"Guess who gets a crit to the fucking throat? Fucking guess."

"That night on the way home, I had a terrible premonition."

"I, on the other hand, turned my eyes to a magic more solid. Practiced. Dependable. Evil."

"Excuse me while I slip into something more comfortable and grab a snack."

"Man, I can't make shit off the cuff like you can."

"I skipped a couple of classes to perfect my technique."

"He managed to close multiple gaps in security, sleep with most of the attractive ladies in town, and pass the blame onto other people."

"Someone apparently declared war on his fucking religion."

"The enemy of my enemy would make an excellent disposable asset for the given value of a friend."

"The real masters of the craft are dead and gone."

"There's no fucking way in any universe that Tupac was better than Biggie."

"I'd rather vote for someone with a bit of pizazz; what's Liberace doing these days?"

"I came to reenact a James Bond movie and be thrown out under an assumed name. With your hilariously liberal gun laws, that should take most of my holiday."

"That taxidermist ever finish stuffing that poodle? I figure I can use him to keep away the kids on Halloween."

"These morons will make for EXCELLENT cannon fodder."

"Gentlemen, a proposition."

"Can you boys handle getting some parachutes and some speakers for a rock concert? I jut had the best plan ever."

"Apparently these were the worst MP's in the history of our armed forces."

"The theft and dropping of the yacht clearly happened here."

"I planned that shit out like a Shadowrun-style attack, but nothing fucking happened." "I fully expected to crash that thing in a field, followed by the entire fucking military."

"He didn't want to just rage-quit, rocks fall, everyone dies."

"All that mattered at this point was that our deaths were long, glorious, and brutal."

"In a way, we all succeeded in our respective goals."

"The police and federal investigators are all flipping their shit over the blatant wizardry happening."

"We managed to briefly steal a tank from the National Guard and drive it right through a bunch of zombies at a shopping mall."

"Gentlemen, it's been a pleasure."

"We all knew then it was a Last Stand scenario."

"Alright, we win."

"I needed to make sure he had enough time to arrive, but not enough time to actually "arrive"."

"You bastard!"

"You only just noticed?"

"(Blank) then performed the first and only table flip I've ever seen in all my years of gaming."

"I must commend you, human. I did not think you capable of such a task."

"Something I learned early in life, is nobody expects a sucker punch from someone they underestimate."

"You know I never took your gnomes."

"Now I feel like I might've overreacted a bit."

"You apparently gave them up for a charity auction."

"The man and the mad god died together, moments later."

Ain't nobody gonna mourn me or give a shit that I even lived."

"Well I'm either in Hell, or Utah. Utah, knowing my luck."

"That better not be a fuckin' mirage."

#old man henderson #rp meme #askbox meme #inbox meme #roleplay meme #rp memes #starter sentences #sentence starters #ask box meme #starter prompt #sentence meme

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hood-ex · 3 years

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I'd be thrilled if you did a crash (plane or other vehicle) in winter weather with Dick and Roy 🤣 ok, we all know I'd just be thrilled to read any hurt comfort or whump with Dick, and bonus Roy is a bonus 😁 excited to see what you come up with for all of these prompts.

Roy’s running, and he’s running fucking fast. The air he sucks in through his mouth is cold enough to make his teeth throb, and his legs are burning as he pushes them to go faster. It’s a relief when the adrenaline consumes his whole body and leaves everything numb except for the erratic beating of his heart. Now he can focus on getting to the hunk of aluminum that just went down with Dick inside of it.

Holy shit, he can’t believe that just happened. He can’t fucking believe the plane Dick hijacked started spiraling towards the ground after the pilot nosedived. If Kyle hadn’t acted when he did... if he hadn’t caught the plane before it crashed...

Roy shudders. He doesn’t want to think about that. He doesn’t want to imagine Dick’s body burning up into nothing but a pile of ash. That’s just... no. That can’t happen to Dick. Nothing’s supposed to touch him. Roy’s not supposed to let something like that touch him.

He’s only about fifty feet away from a motorcycle when a H.I.V.E. goon tries to intercept him with his gun, and damn, can’t the yellow wearing H.I.V.E. freak see that Roy doesn’t have time for this? He quickly notches an arrow and shoots it in retaliation. It’s one of his trick arrows that shoots out a screen of smoke, and Roy grins because now the yellow fuck can’t see what he’s shooting at.

His legs eat up the distance to the bike before the smoke dissipates, and he swings himself up on the seat in one fluid motion. He’s panting, and his throat feels like the Snow Miser just pissed in it, but he hardly pays attention to that because he catches sight of the key in the ignition, and relief washes over him. One of the H.I.V.E. freaks must have planned on coming back for the bike and just left the key behind for easy access.

Roy’s not one to look a gift horse in the mouth. He takes off like a shot down the paved road past the H.I.V.E. freaks who are wasting their bullets on Kyle. Then he passes H.I.V.E.’s honeycomb shaped building and heads towards the back of it where the plane went down. The closer he gets, the more he can see a runway that stretches on for miles and miles with grass growing on either side of it. He guesses the runway is the reason H.I.V.E. built this base in the middle of nowhere Pennsylvania.

The plane is sitting upright in a patch of grass to the right of the runway in the same place Kyle had set it. Roy wastes no time flinging himself off his bike as soon as it comes to a stop. His heartbeat pulses in his ears, and shit, even though it’s 18° today, he feels his hands sweating and shaking inside his gloves.

He’s not sure what he’s about to walk into is the thing. If Dick didn’t have time to strap himself into a seat then there’s no telling what kind of damage he could have taken during the plane’s freefall. The idea that Dick might be dead is almost more than Roy can handle, and he has to try and take some deep breaths to calm himself down.

The door of the plane is already open, and thank fuck for that because otherwise, this whole thing would take longer, and Roy’s nerves are already shot to hell from waiting. He’s not sure if the open door means someone already got off the plane or not. There’s no telling how many people were inside of it other than Dick and the pilot. Roy thinks probably not many since it’s a private plane that only seems big enough to have about eight or ten seats in it.

He arms himself with a knife just in case, and he has to remind himself not to bulldoze his way inside no matter how badly he wants to. Dick taught him to be stealthier than that.

His footsteps are as quiet as he can make them when he climbs up the small number of stairs on to the plane. The first thing he notices is that it’s just as cold in here as it is outside, which isn’t surprising considering the open door. The second thing he notices is that the door to the cockpit is open with no one inside of it. A look towards the cabin shows no sign of anyone either, and now Roy is cursing a thousand times over in his head because where the fuck is Dick?

“Wing?” he says quietly, maybe a little too quiet.

He heads further into the cabin, checking each of the plush seats for any signs of black and blue. By the time he starts to near the end of the cabin, hope and anxiety are boxing each other in his chest. Anxiety over finding Dick dead, and hope over the idea that maybe Dick is fine enough to have gotten out on his own.

Both feelings sucker punch each other when he gets to the two seats in the back that are facing one other. The one facing Roy is empty. The one turned away from Roy is where Dick sits with his head slumped over his chest.

The fact that Dick is wearing a seatbelt—and Roy is itching to know how the fuck he pulled that off—is such relief that Roy has to clutch on to the arm of the seat and just breathe. Things will be okay, right? Dick’s here. Roy found him. Things are gonna be fine.

He’s not moving, Roy’s brain screams at him, and Roy wants to tell the voice to shut the fuck up. He wants to walk over to the toilet and shove that thought into it and flush it until it’s gone forever. But no matter how much he wants to ignore it, he can’t deny that Dick isn’t moving a damn inch.

Dick’s dead. There’s no blood or wounds on him, but he’s not moving. He has to be dead. If he’s not dead then he’s got a traumatic brain injury that’s keeping him from waking up, and Roy feels like he can’t breathe because neither are good. They’re both really fucking bad, and Roy can’t... Dick can’t...

“Wing?” he says, and his voice is weak and strangled. He doesn’t remember the last time he sounded like this. Probably not since Donna.

He can’t lose him. Not Dick. Never Dick. Dick is supposed to be untouchable. He’s always there. Always there when Roy needs him. Always there when other people need him. He’s not dead... he can’t be dead. God, please don’t let Dick be dead...

He takes his glove off, and even though his hand is shaking, he reaches out to place his fingers against Dick’s pulse. He imagines not feeling anything, and he thinks he’s going to throw up.

The pad of his middle finger barely touches Dick’s skin before Dick suddenly jerks hard to the right. It scares the absolute shit out of Roy, and he flails backward with a yelp, heart thundering in his chest.

“Arsenal?” Dick slurs. His head rolls in Roy’s direction, and Roy has never hated Dick’s mask for deceiving him more than this very moment.

Something like a whimper slips out of Roy’s mouth, and he dives in for a side hug that has his cheek pressed against Dick’s. Their faces are both freezing cold, and even though this is probably one of the most unpleasant hugs Roy’s ever had, it means everything to him. He feels like someone replaced all of his bones with jello, and he can’t help but slump against Dick like he’s a kid seeking comfort.

“I thought you were...” Roy tries to clear his throat, and it’s nearly impossible with how tight it is. “I thought...”

“My head,” Dick interrupts quietly. Roy pulls away from him and sees Dick raise one of his hands to lightly prod at the right side of his head. “Hurts...”

“Must have hit it when the plane was tumbling around,” Roy says a little numbly, thinking that the way Dick is slurring and moving slowly is because he’s concussed. “Probably got nasty whiplash too.”

“I fell in a plane?” Dick says more like he’s talking to himself rather than asking Roy.

Amnesia of the traumatic event. Another concussion symptom.

“Yeah,” Roy says quietly, not wanting to irritate Dick’s senses when they’re bound to be sensitive right now. “You fell.”

Dick’s face twists in confusion. “How did I—”

“GL caught the plane before it could crash.”

“Oh,” Dick says. His mouth is a hard line like he’s trying to make himself remember. “We’re at the H.I.V.E. base getting the kryptonite.”

Roy brushes strands of black hair away from Dick’s eyelets to give his hands something to do, and then he remembers that Dick is still strapped into the chair.

“Yeah, we’re at H.I.V.E.,” Roy says. He gently maneuvers Dick’s arms up so that he can undo the seatbelt.

“I can do it,” Dick says, making zero attempts at it.

“I know,” Roy murmurs.

“We need to get back to the others,” Dick says, and the leader in him that leaks out makes Roy want to smile and roll his eyes all at once. Trust Dick to compartmentalize his near death experience to focus on the mission.

“No, I need to get back to the others,” Roy says. He’s sure that Dick is glaring at him behind his mask, so he quickly tacks on, “You’re staying put until I can send GL to you because you might have hurt your spine or something else during the fall.”

“I’m f—”

“You’re not fine!” Roy hisses. He immediately feels shitty about it when Dick flinches at the loud tone. “You’re not,” he says softer this time. He takes a seat in the chair across from Dick’s and places his hand on Dick’s knee. He’s not sure which of them he’s trying to ground. “You know what I thought when I saw you bent over like your neck was snapped?”

“Arsenal—”

“I thought you were dead, Wing.” And now he knows he’s got Dick’s full attention because Dick cocks his head to the side like he’s assessing Roy’s well-being. “You weren’t moving, and I thought you were just... gone. Gone like GA.” He feels so fucking tired all of a sudden, and he knows it’s the adrenaline crash kicking his ass. “Gone like Troia.”

Dick tenses at that, and Roy hates bringing up bad memories for both of them, but he just needs Dick to understand.

“I need you to be okay,” he says, lightly squeezing Dick’s knee. He stares down at Dick’s feet because it’s better than having to see Dick looking at him like he thinks Roy is fragile. And shit, he kind of is fragile right now, isn’t he? His hands still haven’t stopped shaking for fuck’s sake, and there’s still a sense of fear etched into him that he doesn’t think is going to go away until Dick’s been to a hospital. “I need you to trust me to do this without you like you trusted me with the Titans.”

Dick inhales sharply through his nose and presses his shoulders back against his chair. Roy knows this is hard for him. Hard for him to just sit here where he can’t help keep the team safe. It’s hard for Roy too, knowing Dick is vulnerable in his current state. It kills him that he can’t put Dick on the bike and get him to safety without possibly causing irreparable damage to his body.

“I always trust you,” Dick says, and it warms Roy’s heart to hear it. Getting validation from Dick has always felt kind of like a reward. “And I guess you’re right. I won’t be much help to any of you out there.”

Dick’s face suddenly gets a pinched look, his hand going back to the side of his head. Roy nearly forgot about Dick’s concussion because Dick’s so damn good at faking that he’s okay.

“You’ll be alright?” Roy looks at Dick urgently because he really needs to get back to the others. It’s not like he’s been with Dick all that long by normal standards, but by mission standards, it’s been way too long.

“As alright as I can be after getting my body shaken like a maraca.”

“Nightwing...”

“Yes, I’ll be fine. Now hurry up and go.”

Roy gives Dick’s knee one last comforting squeeze before he goes. Leaving Dick behind makes him feel like a nervous wreck all over again, and he swears that if something happens to Dick while he’s gone, he’ll never forgive himself. But he leaves all the same because he’s got other friends to take care of, and Dick is trusting him to look after them.

Roy won’t let him down.

#not me researching the ins and outs of planes like my writing career depends on it to make sure this whole things seems plausible lmao #Dick Grayson #Roy Harper #Kyle Rayner #my fic #fuyunoakegata

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retphienix · 3 years

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youtube

I'm not sure if I should make this the finale post or not to be honest because I plan on playing some of the DLCs soon, so I'll make this a 'light' finale post because I'm sure I've said more than enough through my playthrough.

Morrowind genuinely surprised me. I heard all the oldguard TES fans saying it's way different and some claiming it was miles better.

Specifically I remember when Oblivion came out I heard from somewhere that Oblivion was just "dumbed down Morrowind" and kid me was like "What the heck are you talking about, Oblivion is the best game in the world (right now)???"

But man, they weren't wrong, but that's hardly what I'd point at in Morrowind in comparison.

Then again my memory of Oblivion is all rose tinted nostalgia and half memories.

What Morrowind is to me today is a fantastic fantasy game with some really interesting lore, a villain I love, a world that feels alien, troubled, imperfect and intriguing, and a gameplay cycle that felt really satisfying to me from the very start to roughly level 20 or so.

I REALLY like how pitiful and overwhelmed I felt at the start of this game- it felt fucking awesome to me and I know for some that's a weird statement and others it's the most obvious thing in the world but man is it true.

Level 1 in Morrowind as a newbie who doesn't know up from down is like waking up in the woods naked with the sound of hungry wolves all around you.

It's brutal, and exciting- every little victory- a potion, a new dagger, a new piece of armor- feels like the world to you.

I LOVED the early game in Morrowind, more than I ever liked it in Oblivion, Fallout 3, Fallout NV, Skyrim, or Fallout 4 (yeah I'm looping the bethesda engine NV in).

Because I constantly felt like I was punching up at a behemoth but I was getting away with it from time to time until I started to feel more on par with the behemoth, and eventually I overcame and hit end game and really became the behemoth and that was fun in its own right.

But I've been "mega end game god" in like 900 dang games at this point, it's always fun! And feeling like I earned it (like here) makes it feel better! But the journey often beats it and Morrowind's journey was so fun to me.

But yeah, beat the main quest. I did a lot in this game, and barely scratched the surface.

Beating it immediately made me think of how fun it would be to challenge myself to beat it- or another objective- right from the start without dumping hundreds of hours into leveling because that early game is a treat.

About the only things I didn't fully love were most of the quest designs showing their age.

Nothing super egregious, but there really was a lot of extremely simple "fetch thing" "Kill thing" "Walk to place" quests that didn't hold additional story value to make up for it.

Not to say simple is bad, but to say having a LOT of my playtime being killing various creatures for no real story reason beyond being asked to makes some actions feel pointless and like busy-work.

There were also quests that DID tie story in, which was really nice to see- things like inter-guild relations becoming a thing for some quests, or some quests having consequences further down the quest chain depending on how you completed it, and of course (as implied) some quests having multiple solutions with some of those solutions being interesting in how you find out about them.

I mean I think it's really neat how the fighter's guild has like 4 quest givers and if you blindly follow them you'll be doing all kinds of questionable stuff with questionable end goals, but if you talk to each of them you'll find that one of them is much more trustworthy and honorable than the rest, and it becomes a common loop to be sent on a quest for the FG and swing by him to ask if the quest sounds legit- AND MANY AREN'T! AND HE OFFERS ALTERNATIVE SOLUTIONS! THAT'S COOL AND LET'S YOU MAKE THE MISTAKE OF BEING TOO LOYAL AND FORGETTING YOUR MORALS BECAUSE YOU ARE "JUST PLAYING A GAME" BUT REWARDS YOU FOR QUESTIONING THAT LOYALTY AND SEEKING ALTERNATIVE SOLUTIONS! THAT'S AWESOME! Though the solution almost always being "just talk to the good guy before you do the quest" was slightly lacking, but such a cool idea.

But there wasn't a ton of this, but there also wasn't not a lot of this- it was an idea they clearly considered playing with and did when they could- I just wish there were both more and that it was used more on the menial tasks you're asked to do as well. I'm a sucker for multiple solutions is all, and consequences appearing later and altering how events play out or quests line up is always cool and I think it only happens a couple times in some guild quests if I'm not mistaken-

But again, I didn't do much in the grand scheme of things lol.

A TON of time invested and still, a metric fuckton to do including 100% of both expansions lol.

So- Morrowind. I really like this game :)

I think it's my favorite TES game, though I might change my mind whenever I revisit TES4, but I can at least say it's my favorite early game BY FAR and PROBABLY my favorite TES game.

I wonder if I can get buff enough to kill Dagoth Ur with like potion abuse. I haven't looked into it, all I know about him (and I knew before this gameplay also, I was just attacking out of curiosity) is that phase 2 rapidly regens health at like 2 billion a second or something, so you have to one shot him if at all possible.

Also I knew that he was supposed to be weaker depending on how many ash vampires you killed, but that that wasn't properly implemented (and I don't think the morrowind code patch bothers fixing it?).

Anywho- great game. I've been playing a lot of good games lately now that I think of it. I mean most of this blog is me playing good games, but I feel like, and I could be mistaken, but I feel like there was a stint there where I was playing "complicated" games and "games I don't enjoy but want to see the merit of so I'm being a sourpuss while I play".

Now I feel like the last 10 dang games were strictly good and or great. Can't say that's a bad thing :)

If you haven't ever played Morrowind before but you're familiar with say Skyrim, I'd honestly say give it a look. A look first- because it's a thick game to begin and you might be able to discern it's not for you based off a look- but a look none the less.

It's Skyrim with more RPG nonsense going on and a more brutal "rags to riches" hero story for your protag. Might be up your alley as much as it ended up being up mine :)

So up next is EITHER an entirely different game with some ocassional Morrowind posts as I touch on the expansions, or more direct Morrowind content as I emphasize the expansions until I finish them, but I'm leaning towards the former.

I think beating the main quest has earned Vaksten the Idiot a short break.

#RetPlays #Morrowind #TES #The Elder Scrolls #Also maybe I should make a new character for the expansions so I'm not OP but I dunno #might just crank the difficulty to max instead of leaving it unaltered and say that's good enough :P #Youtube

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tellywoodtrash · 3 years

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immj2 08.04.21 lb

why the fuck is vansh glaring at riddhima for dadi's dumb accusations???? does he not remember that siya's whole makeover came as a reaction after riddhima's "death" which means, she wasn't in the fucking house when it happened????? i swear to god, every raisinghania has horseshit for brains.

angre's back with a new injury and ishani's reacting like anyone would if their husband came back from work bleeding every single day. she's spitting nothing but facts and is so fucking right to hate vansh.

yessssssssssss ishani is here to take vansh ki class, and i fucking love it. vansh isn't even smirking this time around, coz ishani is really fucking angry and will literally snap his neck like a toothpick if he tries.

phewwwwwwwwww, ishani really going off today and I AM HERE FOR IT.

ofc he's doing that bullshit macho thing of punching shit in his anger and putting the blame on riddhima for all of it. sis idk why you're still with this man. you've obviously grown a brain now, why don't you see him for the abusive loser that he is????/

lmaooooooooooooooooo he's like "WHY WON'T YOU JUST TELL ME?!?!?!? don't you trust me riddhima????" NO BRO. NO. THE SIMPLE STRAIGHT ANSWER IS FUCKING NO. YOU'RE THE LEAST TRUSTWORTHY PERSON IN THIS SHOW. I'D TRUST A RATTLESNAKE BEFORE I'D TRUST YOUR MANIPULATIVE PSYCHO ASS.

suchhhhhh bad dubbing in this scene for rrahul.

anyway riddhima's like "nahi bataana mujhe", lol. i love it.

he stormed off in anger and she's lamenting not being able to tell him the secret until the black box is handed over to vyom. ugh. so lame.

cut to next morning, he woke up and riddhima's nowhere to be seen.

he goes and bangs on ishani's door and he's like "ishani plsssss darwaza kholo.......... main vansh." LOL OK???? BECAUSE WHO ELSE WOULD WE MISTAKE YOU FOR???

angre ready to leap outta bed but lmaoooooooo the look ishani gave him scared him back into lying down. anyway the moment she turns around he jumps up anyway.

ishani's like can you pls leave my husband alone?!?!?!?!?!?! which is well within her rights, coz vansh bhai really be doing bhangra tapdance all over the boundaries one should have as an employer, let alone brother-in-law.

lol vansh's first comment to angre is "ishani is really angry at me for you. i like that she loves you a lot." i'm sure this means more to angre than ishani's confession of love even.

anyway, he got the deets of that random jhopda from angre and is gonna go chaapa maarofy there. angre's like i'll come with, and ishani tears vansh a new one about respecting angre as the damaad of the house. phewwwwwwwww, i love it so much.

idhar bechare not-rrahul se covid ke time mein bhi kaam karwaaya jaa raha hai. baksh do bechaare ko yaar. rrahul se toh nahi karwaaya tha jab usko hua tha, aur woh lead hai. isko 2 hafte ke liye chutti nahi de sakte? kapde bhi nahi pehnne dete.

anyway riddhima is pissed at vyom for acting overfamiliar with his "partner"/"baby doll" nonsense, and is like jaane kaunse manhoos ghadi mein iske saath deal kar liya maine............ anyway, she gotta do black box shit fastttttt.

anyway, he's given her some apt or safehouse or something.

lollipop ladki and her incredibly toned legs (god, i'd kill for them!!!) are following vansh around, saying i gotta talk to youuuu. vansh is like behen, mere se meri ek bandi nahi sambhal rahi, i don't have time or energy for any sidechicks, pls baksh de. jaake aryan ko tang kar tu.

she's bc poori baat toh sun le. goes to show him the tattoo, but he gets a call and leaves. you know what, she shouldn't tell him it's the code to opening that stupid box. let him come beg. and then she can extort 2500 crore outta him.

idhar chained-up kabir is trying to attack riddhima who's like

can't say i'm not masssssssively enjoying this. i love kabir, i do, but he deserves this for all the haraamipannaa that he did to her and ruined her fucking life.

ohhhhhhhhhhhhhhhh she shot at KABIR while in the red leather catsuit, not vansh. a pity. shoulda shot both when she had the fucking chance, and lived a free life.

ugh she's doing all this coz he tried to kill vansh? not just for her own shits and giggles? how fucking disappointing.

i love helly's unbothered acting tho. too good.

riddhima's promising to kill him badeeee itmenaaan se.

she's like v 1.0 of me was a basic bitch who just wanted to marry you and live happily ever after. but you planned differently, so............... thanks for teaching me all the ropes of being an absolute bastard.

kabir warning that yeh jo abhi mera haal hai, vansh gonna do it to you, or worse. pftttttttttttt. tell us something we don't already know, loser.

aaaand now he's calling her a fool. she's not the one in chains rn, my man. matlab hadh hai, rassi jal gayi par bal nahi gaya.

anyway blah blah vansh will find out about your deal, he'll kill us both, blah blah blah. whatevs.

riddhima tells guard fellow ki vansh found out about the place and kabir needs to move. guard veryyyyy wisely removes all the chains on kabir, who then gives dhoka by shoving them out the room and slamming the door shut. wonderful.

aryan/ishani bitching about vansh bhai and plotting to bring him downnnnn so that his tyranny will finally end. good. VERY GOOD. get yours, bitchy kanji aankhon waale sibs. main tumhare saath hoon.

vansh reached the jhopdaaaaaaaaaaa. lord i hope riddhima has become nau do gyaraah with kabir by now.

god all these low angle shots of rrahul...................... UNF, man; fucking UNF. 🥵🥵🥵

phew thank god, place is fucken empty.

has something scrawled on the wall tho.

an address......... IN BLOOD. but........... how the fuck would kabir know where riddhima's moving him to and have the time to write it out on the wall???

bwahahahahahahahahahaha and they're bringing kabir to the exact same set, saaaaaame room. man i know budget kam hua hoga OTT ki wajaah se, but there's a million rooms on this set, koi bhi doosra choose kar lete.

anyway, this is the safehouse vyom gave riddhima. good on her for asking for and getting the resources she needs to carry out her nefariousness.

ohhhhhhhhhh, address kabirrrrr ne nahi, RIDDHIMA ne likha tha, galat waala.

loving how she's playing alllllllll these suckers. i know she's not gonna stay winning for long, so imma just enjoy it for the time. *sigh*

precap: vansh's dumb ass finally figured out address fake tha, while riddhima finally gets her hands on the black box. and now he's following her around as she goes to make the drop. BORING!

#ishq mein marjawan 2 #immj2 #immj2 lbs #episode liveblogs

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paradox-psyc-hoe-sis · 4 years

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5 + 1; Bucky Barnes

(Five times Bucky Barnes almost kissed you, plus the one time that he did)

Bucky x reader, avengers x reader ,(platonic)

Warnings: a lil bit of swearing :)

Word count: 4.4 k (I'm sorry)

A/n: I LOVED WRITING THIS SO MUCH! I'm back at it again with my obsession with James Barnes, so here it is. Thank you for reading, I hope you enjoy it! - Aphrodite :))

(1) "C'mon James, you need to go to bed!" Bucky was sprawled out on the sofa in the Avengers common area, face pale and clammy. You had been with the avengers for a year, and Bucky was definitely the person you were closest with. You didn't know if you saw him as a brother, a best friend or even something more, but you both definitely felt connected.

"Y/n," he groaned, "I'm fine. I've survived Russian medical tests and torture, a little cold is something I can handle." He sniffed and wiped his nose on a tissue, putting it into his jumper pocket. He looked seriously in pain, his forehead sparked beads of sweat and his eyes looked tired, almost hollow.

"Firstly, it's not a cold, it's the flu." You stated, picking up a few stray tissues and throwing them into the bin a few meters away. "Secondly, if you don't go to bed now I will carry you, and God knows neither of us want that." You glared at him, expression stern with your hands on your hips.

"Good god, you're beginning to turn into Steve." He muttered, rising from the sofa. Heaving in pain, you put his arm over your shoulders and helped him to his room.

Once you got to Bucky's room, he sat on the edge of the bed. You stayed at the door, holding onto the door frame. "Right, change into your pyjamas and get comfy in bed. I'm going to the medical bay to get you some cold & flu meds, a thermometer and a glass of water. I'll be back in two secs."

Once you left, Bucky took off his jumper and sweats, to be left in a black tank top and his boxers. He flopped into bed, pulling the blanket up to his waist. You returned after a few minutes, not bothering to knock on the door. You spend more time in his room than yours, and you knew he didn't mind your presence.

Panting, you set down a small glass of water and a box of tablets, holding a small thermometer and cloth in the other hand. He looked up at you, puzzled at your breathlessness.

"Ran into Tony...on the way...had to run away...so he wouldn't ask me why...I had medicine and stuff." You took a few deep breaths and plopped onto the bed, sitting cross-legged facing Bucky. Taking the dry cloth, you gently patted at his forehead, mopping up a small bit of sweat. You continued to do this, moving a few stray pieces of hair from his face and tucking them behind his ear, until he looked a bit better. Although you were both silent, an awful lot of eye contact was held, and that was a conversation all in its self.

"Thank you, y/n." Bucky looked serious, as if there was something he really wanted to tell you. Laughing, you popped two cold & flu tablets out of a packet and placed them on the nightstand. "Jeez, don't get all soft on me now. You're not dying, Buck, I just want to make sure you're alright!" You grabbed the thermometer and held it up to his mouth. "This won't taste good, but once this is over I will definitely make you some soup. Open wide..."

Bucky smiled, shaking his head. "I have arms, y/n, I can do this mys-" you shut him up by shoving the thermometer into his mouth, laughing when he almost choked on it. As he re-adjusted the thermometer, you placed a hand on his forehead. He relaxed under your touch, closing his eyes; he was definitely burning up, his forehead was far warmer than your hands.

You took the thermometer from his mouth and brought your hand back from his head. Bucky opened his eyes, and you gave him a sigh. "Yep, you've definitely got a fever. You need to rest, I'll come and check on you soon...maybe put on a movie? Anything to distract you, really. Okay?" Bucky nodded, sitting up a bit more. You leant in and gave him a hug, and placed a kiss on his cheek. You pulled away slightly, your foreheads inches away. You leaned into his touch, his hands holding your arms, but stood up when you realised what was happening.

"I...I'll see you soon, Buck." And with that, you were gone.

(2) The clock read 6:14. The smell of marinara sauce and french cheese wandered around the avengers tower, making you grow more and more hungry by the second.

One minute. One minute, and you'd be able to stuff your face with Wanda's signature pasta. One more minute and you'd be in pasta heaven. One more minute.

You began to grow impatient, the ticking of your clock driving you insane. You paced in your room, mouth watering at the thought of the delicious dinner waiting for you. 30 seconds.

Your stomach growled like a tiger hunting it's prey. You opened your door, an even stronger whiff of Wanda's creation hitting you like a sucker punch. You turned back around to look at the clock - 5 more seconds.

It's almost time.

4 more seconds.

You couldn't wait.

A month's worth of pleasure waiting for you on one plate.

Anticipation bubbled inside of you.

This is it.

The clock turned to 6:15, and you heard Wanada call from the floor below.

"DINNERS READY!"

Racing out of your room, you ran at the speed of light. You knew what was waiting for you, and you weren't going to waste any time getting to it.

Jogging down the stairs, you saw everybody around the kitchen, talking and laughing; you got to the 5th step from the bottom before you ankle buckled underneath you. With a yelp, you twisted and fell, trying to grab the banister for support but failing. However, you didn't fall on the floor, but fell into a pair of arms. Looking up, you saw Bucky grinning.

"You're telling me you can kill 8 Hydra agents with one bullet while fighting off three more at the same time, but when it comes to stairs you forget how to walk?" Tilting your head back in laughter, Bucky tightened his grip, holding you bridal style. Almost falling out of his arms, you threw your hands behind his neck, causing you both to laugh even more. You heard Wanda and Nat laughing with you from the kitchen, but you were only focused on Bucky. After you stopped laughing, you smiled widely, looking back at him.

"The sad part is, you know exactly why I was running down the stairs." He smiled back, eyes glistening. "Mhm," he nodded, rolling his eyes, "you are so desperate to see me that you couldn't help but run!"

Giving him a fake slap on the arm, you chuckled.

"I know, I know. You really want the pasta, don't you?" Nodding, Bucky shook his head. You felt relaxed in his arms, comfortable and secure. He could've put you down a few minutes ago, but you didn't mind. You looked into his eyes and he did the same thing, breath hitching in your throat. Only just realising that your face was particularly close to Bucky's, you felt his gentle breath on your cheek. You closed your eyes as he leaned in closer to you, his hair tickling the side of your face.

"What's up with the lovebirds!?" Tony exclaimed (loudly), walking into the kitchen. Both you and Bucky bolted upright, and you fell out of his arms. Hitting the floor with a smack, you landed face-up.

"Son of a BITCH, that hurt!" You yelled, Bucky rushing to help you up. You all laughed, but something inside you felt disappointed, almost unfulfilled.

(3) after dinner that night, you avoided Bucky for roughly a week. You felt embarrassed, awkward, so you kept your distance. You went down to the training room one day and checked the chart: Wednesday - Sam and Bucky's turn to use the sparring mat. You didn't mind being in the same room, as he'd be focused on training, so you were just going to use one of the machines. When you walked in, you found Bucky on the treadmill - Sam wasn't there. Luckily, Bucky hadn't noticed you yet, so you turned around and slowly walk away. Before you were fully out of the door, you heard Bucky call your name.

"Y/n!" Sighing, you turned back around and gave Bucky a tight smile. "I thought today was your turn to train with Sam?" You asked, placing the water bottle and small towel that you were carrying on one of the benches and crossing your arms, becoming conscious that you were only wearing shorts and a sports bra; it was summer, after all.

He smiled and wiped his forehead with his own towel, stepping off the machine. "Yeah, Sam didn't feel so good and had to cancel. Thought I'd come here on my own, but you're here now, right? D'you want to spar?" Your mind raced, you knew there was no getting out of this one.

"Sure thing. I train with Nat anyway and I definitely need a break from her Russian spy tricks." He laughed as you both stepped onto the training mat. "Is now a bad time to remind you that I'm trained in Russian spy tricks?" You smiled, genuinely relaxed. "Maybe not."

Not a second had gone by and you had already started sparring. You kicked him on his side, he punched you in the throat, you pushed him onto the floor, he took you with him with a swift move of his leg. You both jumped up and started all over again, even more vigorous. You went to punch him on the side of his face, but he grabbed your wrist before it met his cheek. "Try again."

With your free arm, you elbowed him above the shoulder and punched him in the nose. In retaliation, you recieved a blow to the stomach, but you were quick to push him up against the wall and lock him there with your arm against his throat. You leaned in close and whispered in his ear.

"I've been wanting to kick your ass all week."

He quickly flipped you over, and you pressed your back against the wall. He pinned your arms up above your head with one hand and held your waist with the other. You tried to kick him away, but his legs were pressed flatly against yours. He leaned in even closer.

"Yeah? Hit me with your best shot."

His words were a mix between whisper and a grunt, which sent a shiver down your spine. However, you knew his weakness. You pressed your forehead against his, and his grip weakened slightly. Just before your lips were about to touch his, you raised your leg and hit him in the crotch with your knee. He stumbled backwards, giving you the perfect opportunity to strike him in the chest. He went toppling to the side, falling heavily onto the floor. Calmly, you walked over and looked down at him.

"Is that the best you can do?"

(4) summer came and went in a flash, and before you knew it, the trees had lost their leaves and everything was a warm shade of red and orange. It was a late autumn evening and you had been reading in bed. It was far to cold for pyjamas, so you wore joggers and one of Bucky's knitted jumpers that you had stolen a few months ago, it smelled exactly like him. Turning your bedside light off, you glanced at your clock, which read 10:53. Laying down, you soon fell into sleepy doze, the sound of rain patterning against your window aiding your sleep.

You must have been asleep for almost an hour before you were woken up. Light streamed into your room from the open door in front of you, and you saw the silhouette of somebody crouched down by the side of your bed.

"Hmm?" You sat up and rubbed your eyes, adjusting to the light. The person sat next to you on your bed and you immediately knew who it was.

Bucky.

He looked a bit guilty for waking you up, but his eyes looked sorrowful and ridden with regret.

"Nightmares again?" You tiredly asked, placing a hand on Bucky's shoulder. He nodded, avoiding your gaze; his hair was pinned back into a bun, and his hands shook slightly. Usually, when Bucky had nightmares, he'd get into your bed and cuddle you, falling asleep with you by his side. However, you wanted to do something to distract him from his memories, and not just cuddle him. He stood up, about to walk to the other side of your bed before you stopped him. Rolling out from underneath the covers, you walked over to your record player and set up a vinyl. It was a record that Buck had gotten you for your birthday, 'The Best Of The 60s'. Quietly, Elvis began singing one of his ballads as you walked over to Bucky.

Placing your arms behind his neck, you gently swayed to the beat of the music. He cautiously wrapped his arms around your waist and bent down slightly, allowing you to rest your face in his neck. You couldn't be any closer; your torsos were pressed firmly against each other, arms tightly gripping to the other person. As you both rocked back forth, Bucky raised one of his arms up and placed a hand behind your head, holding you closer. You had never felt safer in your life, and you began to think about the man holding you.

When you first met, you could honestly say that you were scared of him. You weren't intimidated by him, but you were terrified that he would snap at you or hate you as soon as you met. You could've never guessed that you'd have the sort of connection that you do, but it worked out brilliantly. After growing more mature with each other, you found it easier to empathise with him. Everything that he had been through - torture, near death experiences, kidnapping, forced murder - you felt the same pain as he did.

Tightening your grip around him, you let out a few tears. You were comfortable crying around him, he never made you feel uncomfortable, yet you really didn't want to break down in this situation. But guess what? You broke down anyway.

The few drops on your cheeks became a river of tears as you thought more about Bucky. Your shoulders heaved, and Bucky noticed instantly. He knew why you were crying, he felt the same pain. He stroked your hair, warm fingertips against your scalp. He lifted your jumper up ,slightly, with his other hand and rubbed circles on the small of your back. Your skin tingled under his burning touch.

Bucky's eyes stung with tears; there was a lingering thought between you both that hung in the air, and he hated seeing you in pain. You pulled back from him, moving your arms to his shoulders. The music stopped a while ago, but you still moved to a shared rhythm. You looked down, but Bucky used his real hand to lift your chin up. His hand was large and warm, radiating heat. He cupped your cheek, and with his thumb, brushed away a few of our tears. You tilted your head into his hand, closing your eyes. In that moment, Bucky would've kissed you. He wanted to lean down and brush your lips with his, run a hand through your hair as he kissed you. Yet he saw the sleepiness in your face, and knew it wouldn't be right.

Putting both arms around your waist, he effortlessly lifted you up, and you wrapped your legs around his hips. He walked you back over to your bed and placed you underneath the soft covers, planting a kiss on your forehead. With a small smile and a 'goodnight', you were back on your own.

(5) three months later, it was almost Christmas, and the avengers had gone all out. The group always did something ridiculously extra over the holidays, and this year Tony had rented out an ice skating rink. It was only a few blocks away from the Avengers tower, so you all took one of Tony's limos down there. You wore a red turtleneck jumper, a plaid skirt and black tights, as the group arranged that the dress code was red. Bucky wore a dark red shirt + hoodie with jeans, and everybody else wore an odd combination of christmas jumpers, cardigans, tee shirts, and (in Steve's case) a red Hawaiian shirt.

In the limo was you, Bucky, Tony, Steve, Natasha, Wanda, Sam, Bruce, Vision and Clint. Everybody was invited, but many had gone home to see their family for the holidays. You all made a pretty nice group, though.

The skating rink was huge, enough to fit hundreds of people. As you all sat outside of the rink putting on your ice skates, Tony asked a very important question.

"How many of you guys can actually skate?"

Out of all 10 of you, only three could say that you've skated before.

"I can." You stated, tying up your laces.

"Same here." Replied Wanda.

"Me too." Said Sam. Everyone looked at him, amused yet puzzled.

"What!? My mom made me go with her when I was a kid, alright?" Everyone laughed, and Sam looked slightly pissed.

Once you were ready, you carefully stood up and took Bucky's arm.

"D'you want to skate with me?" You asked, entering the rink. You flawlessly made your way around the edge, Bucky slipped quite a few times. "How did you get so good at this?" He questioned, clinging onto the barrier for dear life.

"I used to go all the time with my friends, there was a cute little skating rink next to our school." You span around on the ice, landing perfectly on your feet. Bucky tried to leave the wall but fell directly onto his bottom, making you laugh harder than you ever have.

The night went on peacefully as you skated with your friends. Nat and Wanda stayed together the entire time, hand in hand, and every time you looked over at Steve he was on the floor. You and Bucky spent your time skating around the rink together, talking about anything and everything, laughing whenever you saw Steve fall over. You all decided to leave at 9pm, and 9pm seemed to be coming closer by the second. You and Bucky were the last ones left on the rink, everybody else had gone to the limo. Steve sat on the bench outside of the barrier, putting his shoes back on.

"Should we wait for you guys?" He asked, putting his skates back on the shelf.

You glanced at Bucky who had just fallen over and giggled. "Nah, we'll get a taxi."

Steve left, and Bucky got back up. "Come over here." You beckoned him to the centre of the rink where you were stood. He laughed, shaking his head. "And sign my death certificate? No thank you."

"C'mon Buck, you haven't left the barrier all night!" You skated over to him and took his hand. "I'll help you?" He sight and gave you his other hand, and you both slowly skated over to the centre of the rink. "See how easy this is?" You asked as you let go of his hands and span around on the spot. Moments after you let go of his hands, he fell backwards. You didn't realise until too late, and fell over his leg, resulting in you on top of him. You couldn't of landed worse; your legs were straddling his hips, your chests pressed up against each other, your hands on the ice either side of Bucky's head.

Laughing nervously, you gave him an awkward smile and apologised. He sat up, you now sat, facing him, oh his lap. You both thought the exact same thing - now was the perfect time to kiss. Both of you slowly leaned in, and your lips barely brushed before the lights went out. You laughed hysterically, plunged into darkness.

"Shit," Bucky exclaimed, holding onto your hand, "how are we going to get out?"

(6) not a week had gone by before the new year came around, and Pepper had planned a new years eve party. Despite it only being the same eleven of you that spent Christmas together, Pepper told you all she wanted everybody to wear suits and party dresses, so you could have a fancy new years party. It was 8:25pm when you went to the common area. Everything was different; furniture had been moved, there was a soft orange glow from the ambience lights that lit up the room, and the large windows showed the rest of the city below ((the common area looks how it did in the party scene in age of ultron)). You were the last to arrive, and you heard music playing from the common area as you walked down the stairs.

Tony had hired chefs and bartenders, and set up a photo booth in the corner of the room. Fairy lights were strung around the large room, and you heard the sound of Steve, Bucky and Sam laughing together. You wore a floor length, red glittery dress that had a cut on the side, running from the floor to the side of your thigh. Your hair was curled and gently flowed down your shoulders, almost meeting the sweetheart neckline on your dress. Your outfit was complete with a pair of red heels, and you could admit that you looked stunning.

Once you got to the bottom of the stairs, you immediately walked over to Natasha and Wanda who were at the bar. Nat wore a knee length black bodycon dress with spaghetti straps and stilettos, whereas wanda wore a dark purple tiered dress with black wedges. As soon as they saw you, both of their jaws dropped. You blushed, your cheeks matching the red lipstick you wore. "I'm overdressed, aren't I?" You asked, feeling slightly self conscious.

"No way! You look amazing!" Wanda reassured, looking you up and down.

"Wanda's not the only one thinking it." Natasha said as she pointed a finger past your shoulder. You looked behind you and saw Sam, Steve and Bucky staring at you. Steve and Sam merely gaped at your appearance, whereas Bucky grinned at you. Turning back around, you laughed with Nat and Wanda and grabbed a bottle of water from the bartender. Once you got your drink, you walked over to Bucky who was now sat alone on one of the sofas.

"Good evening, James." You spoke in a fake posh accent which made both of you laugh, and you sat down next to him. He wore an all black suit, his hair styled nicely, falling past his jaw. You began talking, but the chit chat didn't last long before Tony arrived from the kitchen.

"Tables set guys, let's eat!"

You sat next to Natasha at the rectangular dinner table, Bucky sitting across from you. Everyone ate steak and salad, and you each went around the table saying what your new years resolution would be. When it got to your turn, you were stumped.

"I don't know...I can't really think of anything." You stated, taking a sip of your glass of white wine.

"Even though we've known you for a year and a half, there's still so much that you haven't told us about yourself." Clint opined. There was a mutual agreement between the rest of the group, but Bucky stayed silent.

"Maybe your new years resolution could be to learn a language?" Sam added, taking a bite of his dinner. Bucky snickered as you turned to face Sam.

"Non penso sia davvero necessario." (I don't think that's really necessary) Everybody looked taken aback at your bilingual secrecy, except Bucky. Instead, he just smiled at you.

After dinner, everybody went back to the common area and danced. After Tony and Steve got defensive about who could dance better, they decided to host a mini dance competition. Bucky looked around, but you were nowhere to be seen. Before anybody could notice he was leaving, he snuck out of the room and down the corridor. It took him a few minutes before he saw you out on the balcony, staring up into the night sky.

"What's up?" He asked as he stepped out into the cold breeze, placing an arm around your shoulder. You tilted your head to rest on his arm, and sighed, your breath forming a little cloud of steam. "I'm just thinking about that delicious chocolate ice cream." Bucky laughed, thinking back to the ice cream everybody had for dessert. "I don't blame you, it was very nice." He spoke, voice calm and sweet.

"Hmm" you sight contently. Bucky felt the goosebumps on your arms and pulled away.

"Here." He said, taking off his blazer and handing it to you.

"Thank you, Buck." You replied, wrapping it around your cold arms.

"Wait..." He paused, looking at your face. "Mhm, you've got a bit of chocolate ice cream in the corner of your mouth!" He laughed as you wiped around the side of you lip.

"Gone?" You asked, examining your clean finger. "Nope, try again." You breathed out, swatting at your mouth again, but your finger always came back clean. "Can you get it off for me?" You asked him, and he smirked.

"Sure thing, y/n."

He leaned in close to you and crashed his lips onto yours. His lips were dry and he kissed roughly, making your soft lips turn to jelly under his. Your hands found his neck, and his your waist as you ran a few fingers through his hair. He pulled you closer, deepening your kiss, as you sighed into his mouth. You weren't quick to pull away, making sure you savour the feeling of his lips against yours. You smiled at him as he looked at you, pure admiration in his eyes.

"You don't know how fucking long I've been waiting to do that."

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johnnyscancerstick · 5 years

Text

Chap. 9

Warnings: feels, death, cursing.

Characters: Dallas Winston, Johnny Cade, Ponyboy Curtis, and a few random doctors and policemen.

Notes: @watermelon-chapstick , this is what I was talking about. I should let y'all know it takes a lot to make me cry. Teared up while writing this, and I think that means it's good enough to post. Lol, I'm well aware this was meant to be a shitpost, but I don't care. I wanted to write something feelsy and you damn know well I did and tried my best. I might make more of these in the future if people like this. Or, if people want more. I decided to post it on my own, not just a repost. I still put a lot of time into it, and I wanted it on my blog on it's own! This extra note is the only thing that's different — I didn't change anything else.

Word count: 1903

As quickly as it had started, it was over. Had this really happened? Or is it some fucking fever dream because of all the painkillers those hospital people had given me? No, it couldn't be. Dreams can't simulate this kind of stuff, we just beat the Socs!

‘I can't beleive they were gonna do this without me,’ that's not the only reason I wanted to do this, that's not the only reason I threatened to stab a bitch. Multiple. It was the only one I wanted to beleive but I know it's not.

I look down at Ponyboy, who was bleeding like hell and the rest of him looked even worse. He couldn't have been used to fighting solo, clearly. I shook my head, not going to ignore the situation any longer. I could miss my chance if I did that. I bent down and grabbed his collar, turning and yanking him up a bit after I started on a dead run. “Come on!” I couldn't hear myself. “We're goin' to see Johnny.”

Pony wasn't in any shape to be running but I could just remember Johnny's voice. He wanted to see everyone, but I knew there wasn't time. Ponyboy, if he could choose anyone to see it'd be him, wouldn't it? They were such good friends, and he's the one that will cooperate the most. Goddamnit, move faster! “Hurry! He was gettin' worse when I left.” don't think about that. “He wants to see you.”

I'd taken Buck's T-bird here and I didn't plan to go any slower than 110 to get back to the hospital. I got into the driver's seat and rhe second Pony was halfway in he car, I got into gear and slammed on the gas. I almost hydroplaned it across a curve and then I heard the sirins. Great, out of all the times. Think of something, Winston, think of something.

I don't even turn to the boy in the passenger's seat, but I find myself slowing down the car. “Look sick.” I say stiffly, furrowing my brows and narrowing my eyes. This could work, I don't have time for a police chase right now. “I'll say I'm taking you to the hospital, which'll be truth enough.”

The policeman said something like ‘Where's the fire.’ I wasn't paying attention. I glanced at him, I cant express how mad I was that he was slowing us down. Johnny only has so long!

“The kid.” I stayed cool, or at least I think I did, pointing at Pony. “He fell over on his motorcycle and I'm takin' him to he hospital.” Pony groaned a little, and I can't tell why.

The guy by the window looked nervous and glory, this was taking too long. “Is he real bad? Do you need an escort?” Oh, hell yeah, this could work. “How would I know if he's bar or not? I ain't no doc.” I fight a smile at how good this worked out. “Yeah, we could use an escort.”

The fuzz are really stupid, these days! “Sucker!” I hiss, he went back to his car. Now we didn't have to worry about traffic, or other cops. I don't know what I was mumbling about that entire ride there, I know I was talking about Johnny.

Once we were at the hospital I slammed the door shut and ‘helped’ Pony out of the car, but the second that police officer left, we were gone down that hallway. I heard yelling but I didn't even acknowlage them, I couldn't think of anything but Johnny, to the point where I let Pony's wrist go and I know he fell far behind. I didn't have time for an elevator, I raced up the stairs and almost clipped a wall a few times.

It felt like an eternity but I finally got to Johnny's room and I was going to break down the door if it wouldn't open. “I'm sorry, boys, but he's dying.” just those words sent horrible aches in my heart and I felt my chest tighten.

No, no, no. This isn't happening, he's not dying, he's not! Johnny can't die, he can't, this can't be happening. I take out Two's switch, whipping my head toward the doctor and jabbing it in his face. I didn't flick it open until I opened my mouth and started talking. “We gotta see him.” I said, my tone scared me even more than I already was, I hadn't heard myself like ths in a long time. I cleared my throat, furrowing my brows. I tried to be intimidating, I'd never had trouble with this before but now I was all trembly and it was visible, I could barely keep my hand still. “We're gonna see him and if you give me any static, you'll end up on your own operatin' table.” I sneer, I tried my best to keep my voice down.

This dude didn't even bat an eye, the little... Oh how I wanted to tell him off, I wanted to tell him just how much I needed to get into that room.

But he took me by surprise. “You can see him, but it's because you're his friends, not because of that knife.” I wasn't going to press, he was letting me in and for once I didn't want to fight. I put the switch back in my pocket and pushed the door open, I ran only for a few seconds before I swore something stopped me. I stumbled forward and made sure I didn't fall, and I could see Pony walk into the room out of the corner of my eye.

Johnny was white and looked still, I couldn't tell if he was breathing or not and I felt tears well up in my eyes. I gritted my teeth and shut them tight, it's not the end! Johnny isn't dead, he's not! He's just.. He's just asleep, he'll wake up any minute now. I took a few steps forward and wiped the sweat off my lips, “Johnnycake..?” my voice was low and hoarse, and I couldn't see even though it opened my eyes. I could barely hear anything else, everything else was shut off and didn't exist at that moment. Nothing was real, this wasn't what was going on. This really can't be happening.

Johnny didn't respond and I had to say something else. I had to prompt him again, this isn't how this ends. “Johnny...” I felt the hope drain from my whole body, but that little bit came up again when he moved. “hey..” his voice, god, that tore through my soul harder than anything else had.

I walked toward him after glancing at the Christopher around my neck, “We won.” I was out of breath and it was hard to get it back, I couldn't comprehend this and I just wanted to get him to say something. “We beat the Socs. We stomped them—chased them outa our territory.” I said, I was desperate at this point. Johnny's eyes were barely open and I couldn't tell if he could see the tears welling. I bit my lip as he just gave an unsatisfied hum, “Useless...” he croaked, “Fighting's no good...” he was so white, and I felt panic rising within me again.

No, he's dying and this isn't going to be the last thing I say to him! I gotta tell him something, something that'll make him smile, I've been keeping so much in about him all this time, how hard would it be to tell him now? When I literally have no other chance..!

I licked my lips and tried to find my voice through all the emotion, “They're still writing editorials about you in the paper. For being a hero and all.” I tried to keep my voice calm, I didn't let it break, I didn't want to cry in front of him. That would make this even worse, that would make him feel awful, that would just be the worst thing I could do right now. “Yeah..” he hadn't responded yet but for the sake of my sanity I had to act as if he did, “They're calling you a hero now and heroizin' all the greasers.”

I couldn't say it, I just couldn't, it was too hard, I tried so hard but I couldn't.. Hopefully he'll get he message. “We're all proud of you, buddy...” I managed a smile, I felt hot tears run down my face. I tries to wipe them off, but they'd just look like dweat and I wasn't going to take my eyes off Johnnycakes.

He looked so happy, his eyes lit up. I let out a half sob and kept my composure, I took a deep breath and was about to day something else, but he spoke. “Ponyboy.”

I backed up. I wasn't going to take it away, I'd forgotten Pony was there. I'd forgotten anyone was there. Johnny wanted to talk to Pony, he'd already talked to me, danmit I'm so selfish.

I don't know what he said but as I stepped closer, he just...

I broke into a grin and felt more tears fall down my cheeks. I was trembling, I could barely keep myself up, I felt like the world spun around me and for some reason, I wanted to laugh.

I reached a shaky hand over and brushed his bangs off his forehead, “Never could keep that hair back.” I could hear I was under pronouncing any soft sounds and I saw everything blur around me. “That's what you get for tryin' to help people, you little punk...” reality was setting in and I found it hard to breathe. Johnny wasn't... He.... He was.. He's not.. No. He's fine, Johnny is fine, nothing happened, nothing's wrong. I took a quivering breath, the smile faltering. I tried and I tried to keep it up, I know this wasn't what was going on, I know he's... But no, no I won't believe this. This is NOT what's happening, it's not it's.. It's not... It can't be... Johnny can't be dead, oh he really can't be... “There what you get..” I couldn't get the words out, I whipped toward the wall and punched it as hard as I could.

“Damnit Johnny..” I didn't have the energy, I couldn't have screamed if I wanted to. I ground my fist and hit the wall again, grinding my teeth and trying to do anything but think of him.

Don't think of how he used to be

Don't think of what happened

Don't think of what happened to him behind closed doors

Don't think of what he did for those kids

Don't think of him not wanting to die

Don't think of him only being sixteen

Don't think of him never leaving Tulsa

Don't think of him...

“Oh, damnit, Johnny...”

Don't think of those mocha eyes and how they lit up whenever I smiled at him.

“Don't die..”

Don't think of how brave, persistent, and strong he was-

Don't think of how brave, persistent, and strong he is

“Please,”

Don't think of how he would have turned out.

Don't think of how good of a person he would have ended up being.

Don't think of all the things I could have told him

Don't think of all the things thst would have made him happy, thst would have made him smile.

“Don't die...”

#dallas winston #johnny cade #ponyboy curtis #outsiders #jally #nooooooo #nooo #...#no.#i mean #i might make more #i'm not crying you're crying

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