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bunnysuit-femboy · 3 years

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The Killer

(Reiner x Reader) - Word Count: 3.8k

Creature: a person who commits a series of murders, often with no apparent motive and typically following a characteristic, predictable behavior pattern.

Warnings: Major Character Death, Mentions of Drugging and Alcohol, Dry Humping

Quick Summary: while attending a friend’s Halloween party, you stay with a friendly face all night.

Extra notes: One more day until Halloween!

You never understood why people decided to party so much for Halloween. Hadn’t they watched a single scary movie, every time a serial killer shows up, there’s always a party involved. It’s as if the murderers could sniff out alcohol and hormones and was already on their way there, ready to murder somebody discreetly in the garage door when she goes out to get more to drink.

You weren’t stupid though. When you got invited to Hitch’s Halloween party, you assessed your options; either go to the party and get your guts displayed for your entire friend group, or go to the party and stick with somebody you trust so you don’t end up on an episode of Dateline. As smart as you are, not going to the party just wasn’t an option, Hitch was depending on you.

You met Hitch freshman year of college after having the great misfortune of being her partner for Chemistry 151. You didn’t know anything about prevalent bonds and she didn’t know anything about the periodic table, so you both depended on each other and surprisingly made it out of the class with a B.

But, unfortunately for you, Hitch started depending on you for more than just classes after that. She started using you as her alibi when she was going out with somebody for the night and wouldn’t be back at her parent’s house until 2 am. And, she started begging you to bring her snacks when she was bored in class and having meals with her whenever she was lonely. And, worst of all, every time Hitch threw a party, she always depended on you to provide the alcohol despite having her own license with an age over 21 on it - sure, it wasn’t real, but it was still a license that said she could drink.

So, if you said no to going to this Halloween party, you would not only lose Hitch’s friendship but a whole house of people’s friendship because you’re the reason the party turned into a dry one. You would force an entire group of college students to not drink for a weekend, and that’s a crime you can never be forgiven of.

Getting the alcohol was the easy part, honestly. You drove over to Hitch’s house with it clanking around in your backseat and trunk. Once you pulled into Hitch’s driveway, it was as if the partygoers could smell the vodka from your car. They all erupted from the front of Hitch’s house with their hands above their heads in victory as the alcohol was finally secured for the party.

So early in the night, only a few close friends were at Hitch’s house already. The current guest list consisted mostly of friends from Hitch’s high school and friends from her dorm building freshman year, before she moved back in with her parents.

The excited group all took turns bringing the boxes of alcohol into the house as you V-lined to Hitch. You walked through the group, moving through them like water as they kept their focus on the bottles in your car. They didn’t care much about who the messenger was, as long as they could get drunk tonight.

“Hey,” You said to Hitch once you were finally within ear shot, “Here’s the change.”

Hitch took the leftover money from your hand, “Thanks, I always know I can count on you.” Hitch came in for a hug, wrapping her arms around you. She pushed her mouth into your ear, whispering lightly to you, “But, please tell me that is not your costume.”

“What?” You moved back from Hitch quickly, gesturing towards your body. “What’s wrong with my costume? I’m Princess Diana.”

Hitch blinked at you, “You’re gonna have to explain that to people all night long, I hope you realize that.” She took another look at your outfit and then back at your face. “That’s just everyday clothes! You’re just wearing a sweatshirt and biker shorts, that doesn’t scream Princess Diana, a crown screams Princess Diana!”

“She was the people’s princess,” You yelled at your friend, “And, I don’t have any more costumes on me, I don’t know why you thought now was the perfect time to hate my costume.”

“That’s fine. I have extra costumes upstairs, let me choose what you are tonight.” Hitch grabbed your hand and led you towards the front door. “I still have to change anyway, so we’ll change together.”

You should’ve assumed Hitch only had short skirts and short shirts up here. And, you should’ve assumed she would put you in some ridiculously skanky costume that was too sexy to really be one costume. When you put the outfit on - a gray skirt, a gray shirt, and big ears - your immediate thought was a cat. You looked like a normal little gray kitten, but after you told Hitch your guess, she almost physically smacked you for guessing so wrongly.

“You’re a fucking mouse,” Hitch said with a roll of her eyes, “How dense can you be?”

“Well, I don’t look like a mouse.”

“A cat,” Hitch mumbled to herself, “What am I, a cat, I guess you were close, but wow, you’d think you’d know your animals.”

“I do know my animals.” You gestured aggressively towards your costume. “But no animal ever wore this.”

“Whatever.” Hitch walked towards you, and towards the door. “I’ll see you downstairs, okay?” With one last swoosh of the white skirt of her sexy angel costume, she was gone and you were alone in her bedroom.

You were back to step one, find a trustworthy buddy for the night. Hitch, as much as you loved her, was the poster child for the dumb girl who dies first in a slasher film. And, you thought maybe Jean or Eren could protect you throughout the night, but they were definitely the jock stereotype in the horror movie. And, with Armin being the nerd, Sasha and Connie being the stoners, you only had two real choices left; Mikasa and Reiner.

But, Mikasa was hard to keep by your side at these events. She was always running around the house, from the kitchen to the bathroom, taking care of everyone but herself. She was the perfect final girl, the one who surprisingly made it out at the end, but you weren’t sure Mikasa would actually want to be alive without Eren who would definitely die once he got caught pissing on a tree out back.

So, your only real option of safety was Reiner. Sure, he fit perfectly into the Jock stereotype - hell he even looked like Chris Hemsworth’s little brother from when he played Curt in The Cabin in the Woods. But, Reiner was different from that stereotypical Jock persona. He was kind and gentle and he always made sure you were okay when you saw him, he was just too nice to be a real jock.

Once you left Hitch’s room, shutting the door behind you to keep out the other partiers, you walked slowly down the stairs, scoping the place out. Your eyes moved over the now full house, watching people dance, and talk, and drink from red solo cups as they moved back and forth between Hitch’s kitchen and living room. You slowly noticed where all of your friends were, hoping that fact in itself would hint to where Reiner was.

Your eyes jolted across the house just as you reached the end of the stairs. Your heart was pounding in your chest as you realized you were right in the heat of the party and you hadn’t found your buddy yet. You needed Reiner to keep you safe, you needed Reiner to protect you with his big arms that could hurt any serial killer who might want you dead, you needed-

“Reiner,” You said as the blonde boy took off his mask right in front of you, “I didn’t realize that was you until now - which I guess makes sense since you were wearing a mask.”

Reiner smiled at you, “Yeah, sorry, it’s just too hot in here for a mask, but you looked afraid. Are you okay?”

He must’ve noticed the slow way you walked down the stairs, and how you looked all over the room. He must’ve noticed the way your hand gripped onto the railing as tightly as possible, as if the wood could somehow balance or even ground you to Earth. Reiner noticed everything, from your unnaturally wide eyes to that extra huff you took before almost giving up on finding him - and from that fact, you were certain, Reiner was just too observant to be the Jock in this horror story.

“I’m fine,” You partially lied, though Reiner made you feel better, your heart hadn’t stopped beating so quickly and your gut hurt from anxiety.

Reiner smiled wide at you, “Great, I’m glad to hear it. Would you like something to drink though?”

“Yeah.” You gave Reiner a weak grin. “I’d love one.”

You walked with Reiner through the piles of people, holding his hand to keep yourself from getting lost. Reiner’s hand was cold and calloused against yours, and he held your palm with a bit of force. After you both made your way into the kitchen, you had to rub the sore muscles now present in your palm from Reiner’s rough touch.

You watched as Reiner made you a drink, pouring corresponding liquids all into a red solo cup. You watched Reiner more than you watched his pouring, he was just too pretty not to look at. You watched as Reiner furrowed his eyebrows at the bottles of tequila, unsure of how much he already put in and how much should be put in for the drink to taste good. Once Reiner finished concocting his masterpiece, he shrugged and handed it to you with a smile.

It was awfully ironic how safe you felt in Reiner’s presence. His costume wasn’t some random outfit, but rather Ghostface from the Scream movies. You had a horrible feeling that tonight was going to end in bloodshed, and if you’ve learned anything from horror movies it was to never trust anyone. But, somehow the only person in the entire house that you felt comfortable with was dressed as your greatest enemy, a heartless serial killer.

You took a timid sip from the plastic cup, the drink was definitely something, that’s for sure. You could taste an aggressive amount of pineapple tequila and lemonade, and despite the rancid smell, the taste wasn’t awful. The liquid moved down your throat, and left a burning trail behind it causing you to jolt forward with a cough.

“Oh no,” Reiner said through a fit of laughter, “Is it that bad?”

You shook your head, “It’s good.” Reiner laughed even harder at your voice, realizing just how high it got in a poor attempt to lie to his face. You weren’t technically lying though, the drink wasn’t the best one you’ve ever had but it wasn’t awful either, it just seemed like Reiner added too much alcohol and didn’t choose flavors that complimented each other well.

“You’re the worst liar I’ve ever met.” Reiner took the cup from your hand and set it on the table where the tequila bottles were all lined up to be chosen from. “But, let me make it up to you. How about, for the next hour, I’ll do whatever you want me to do - sounds good?”

You couldn’t hide the obvious embarrassment on your face as your mind dropped into the gutters. How dirty minded did you have to be to think your close friend’s innocent request could have some sexual undertones. This was Reiner you were talking about, not somebody who would so stupidly hit on you this way, like Eren or even Jean. Reiner was too nice to hit on anyone with such a bizarre idea.

“Okay,” You spoke softly, afraid to answer too quickly and to reveal your excitement from having that much control over Reiner.

“So,” Reiner said with raised eyebrows, “What do you say I do first?”

“Dance with me.” The words came from your mouth before you could think through your options. You could’ve made the boy do anything, and you decided dancing was what you wanted. And, Reiner was definitely just as confused as you were by your words, he furrowed his eyebrows at you, and repeated your request back at you.

“Dance with you?” Reiner said slowly, “That’s all you want - you want me to dance with you?”

“Well, how many chances do I get? Can I choose just one thing for you to do, or do I get multiple chances?”

Reiner grinned as he quietly thought to himself. You couldn’t help but admire his features in his state of pure focus; the way his hazel eyes gilted around the room, the way his hair in it’s messy state from the mask actually looked so much better now than ever, and the way his index finger theatrically rubbed against his jawline where he held his thumb and finger against his chin. He was a sight for sore eyes, and you had to admit you always had a little bit of a crush on the boy - maybe that’s why you gravitated towards him at the beginning of the party, and it really had nothing to do with horror film stereotypes and feeling safe around him.

And, to be fair, you were being a little crazy to actually think there’s some sociopathic asshole who was planning on using the party as a hunting ground. You were getting too into the Halloween spirit, it seemed.

“Okay,” Reiner suddenly said once he finally decided, “I accept - I’ll give you three chances, how about that?”

You smiled at Reiner, “Alright, go make me a new - better! - drink and then meet me on the dancefloor.”

“Okay. But, you still have one more chance after those though.”

“Um,” You said as you poorly attempted to hide your grin, “I’d like to save that one for later in the night.” Reiner raised a single eyebrow at you. “Oh, shut up! I didn’t mean it like that!”

But, that was a lie - you very much meant it like that.

After Reiner walked away to make you a new, and better, drink, you went to your new meeting spot with him on the dancefloor. You walked through the bodies of college students all dancing together. It wasn’t surprising how close the people were dancing to one another, but the close proximity had your mind racing with everything you’ve ever learned from horror films. You were safest here, the killer would never be dumb enough to strike in such a large group of people.

Every horror movie you’ve ever seen always pushed the idea to stay together, and never split away from others because right when you do, it’s over. So, if your gut feeling of something bad happening tonight, you knew it at least wouldn’t happen to you, because you were smarter than these other partygoers - you knew everything about slasher films and the serial killers from them.

You looked all around the dancefloor, not looking at the people’s faces but rather their bodies. You watched where their hands were going and moving, you watched their fingers as they moved them over other people’s bodies. Even if slasher films failed you tonight and somebody did get murdered within the masses, you still knew killers always used knives for some reason so as long as their hands were occupied on bodies, then they weren’t focusing on stabbing somebody. And, if nobody was getting stabbed, that meant you were safe.

“Hey,” You heard the word right as a hand landed on your shoulder.

You jumped from the sudden touch, pulling your head from the dark place it was entering. This nervous feeling of something bad happening tonight was driving you insane all night long. You couldn’t even enjoy the party around you because you were too busy thinking of your next move and your possible escape plan.

“Reiner.” You turned around while rubbing your forehead, trying to alleviate the growing headache. “You scared the shit out of me, give me a warning next time.”

“And,” Reiner said through laughter, “What should I do to warn you in the middle of a dance floor of people? Punch you? Push you? Stab you?”

Your eyes bolted to Reiner’s eyes, “Stab me?”

Reiner tilted his head at you, he was no longer smiling. You realize now he meant the whole stabbing thing as a joke, probably because he was dressed up as Ghostface, but your heart was racing again. Being so close to people was activating your fight or flight, and you felt like running - you’ve only admired horror films, you didn’t want to live in one. But being in this house, and being around these people were making you feel like the main character of one.

“Hey,” Reiner said softly, “You look like you’re going to be sick, why don’t we step outside really quickly, okay?”

You nodded slowly, “Yeah, I’d like that.”

You held Reiner’s hand as he led you outside. You briefly saw as Reiner set your plastic cup down, either on some random table or given to some random partier, you weren’t sure. You couldn’t see much as you moved through the living room, kitchen, down the back porch and to the side of the house where the smokers were hanging out.

Right as the cold air hit your skin, you felt better. Your headache was beginning to disappear or become tolerable at least, and Reiner stood by your side the whole time. He watched as you leaned against the side of the house, taking deep breaths and gripping the bricks to ignore your still rapidly pounding heart.

“Are you feeling better,” Reiner asked gently.

You nodded, “Yes, a lot better - thank you.”

“Of course.” Your eyes were closed, but you felt as Reiner pushed some of your fallen hair behind your ear to see your face clearer. “You know, you still have one more chance.”

You glanced at Reiner from the corner of your eye, “Oh, I do?”

“Yes. If you want to make me do something else, it’s up to you.”

Your mouth broke out into a ridiculous grin as you weighed your options. You knew what you wanted to make Reiner do, it’s what you wanted to do to him for so long now, but should you? What if Reiner didn’t want to do it?

You glanced at Reiner again, now seeing what his eyes were so focused on. His hazel eyes were hard with desire, and they were fixated on your face - specifically, your lips. He watched with pleasure as your grin disappeared and was replaced by your teeth digging into your bottom lip. You were being stupid by thinking that he didn’t want what you wanted, and part of you always knew he did.

“Okay,” You whispered, “I’ve decided - I want you to kiss me.”

Reiner’s eyes flashed to your own eyes, “Really? I had no-”

“Just shut up and kiss me.”

Reiner laughed before moving towards you. He placed his hand gently on your cheek before leaning in for a peck. The kiss was weak enough to make you audibly groan against Reiner’s mouth for more. This wasn’t the kiss you were expecting from him, you wanted passion and desperation, not middle school friends kissing for practice in their bedroom at 2 am.

“How about we play a game?” Reiner said with a mischievous grin.

You furrowed your eyebrows at his words, “What kind of game?”

“I gave you three chances, so you give me three.” Reiner gave you a second quick peck. “I now get to make you do three things.”

“One.”

“Two.”

You smiled at Reiner, “One and a half.”

“A half?” Reiner raised his eyebrows at you. “What does that mean?”

“The half can be something we agree on - and then you can have that one all for yourself, does that sound like a deal?”

Reiner nodded, “What do you think the half should be?”

You were suddenly aware of how cold you were, unsurprisingly the short skirt and crop top weren’t the most ideal October night clothing. Your teeth chattering quietly together, and your arms decorated themselves with goosebumps. You needed some kind of warmth without going back inside, so maybe Reiner could help with that.

“Be my blanket?” Your words came out only slightly interrupted by clattering teeth.

Reiner grinned, “That’s one way to word it, but okay, that’ll be the half chance.”

Reiner leaned on you, holding you against the wall with his body. The new position had you staring into his hazel eyes, and you realized they weren’t as soft as you always remembered. But, the new position was perfect for kissing, in fact your lips were already back on his as desire took over your body. This was the kiss you wanted when you had him kiss you, finally you were getting what you wanted.

Reiner slid his leg between your knees, then pressed his thigh between your legs. The touch was driving you crazy, you tried to move him closer to your body. You wrapped your arms around his torso and to his back, you dug your fingernails into the black cloak of his Ghostface costume, gripping it to pull him closer to you. You felt something hard press into your thigh and you were honestly amazed by how quickly you could get Reiner hard, it almost made you laugh.

“Reiner,” You moaned out as you pressed into him, “Give me more, please.”

“Don’t be impatient,” Reiner whispered before kissing down your neck.

“But, I want more, please.”

“You want more?” You nodded quickly as Reiner kissed back up to your ear. “But, it’s my turn to tell you what to do, remember?”

“But, Reiner-”

“And, I’ve decided what I want you to do for me,” Reiner whispered against the shell of your ear as the hardness against your leg actually began to hurt, “I want you to scream for me.”

“What?”

Reiner moved back and smiled down at you, for a second you could no longer feel that hardness in your thigh before there was a quick flash of silver. You realized too late that the silver was a knife, and you were too stuck between the wall and Reiner’s body to properly get away. Reiner pushed the knife forward, and you felt the pain explode throughout your entire body as it lodged itself in your chest.

One last scream erupted from your throat as a desperate attempt to get you some help before dying here alone. But, you knew how big this house was, how far away from everyone you were at the moment, how loud the music had been inside, and how loud everyone was yelling the lyrics to some stupid song - you knew they’d never hear you, nobody could save you, Hell even horror films couldn’t save you.

#Whore-O-Ween🌙#reiner braun #reiner x reader #aot #snk #snk reiner #modern au #college au #snk smut #aot smut #supernatural smut

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gale-gentlepenguin · 3 years

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Gale Reviews: ML Season 4 Episode 3: Gang of Secret

(Spoilers below)

-So they just beat a villain, and Ladybug is acting SUS. Like she doesn't Want to leave yet. Hmm

-Chat noir YOU SLICK MOFO. (I dare not ruin it, because I am laughing at it)

-She is still not over her break up. So I guess Lukanette stans, get whatever remains of your juice while its there.

-Ladybug ... sweetie. Do you need a hug? Cause you look like you need a hug.

-Chat noir realizing his idea was NOT very smart after that.

-Ladybug ruining experiences for a LOT of couples today

-Chat noir trying to help, but Ladybug aint telling him

-They are going swimming now. Chat noir for once, is not thrilled about hanging out with Ladybug... thats a YIKES.

-She has goggles and a towel, so she did go swimming.

-The Kwami see her in pain, QUICK, TEAR DOWN THE PHOTOS.

-She said no tho, but clearly sad about it.

______________

-So Alya is giving the girl posse the rundown on Marinette. Claiming she is lovesick.

-Rose thought they were cute, and Juleka says nothing. Is it wrong that I want Juleka to have an opinion? Whether positive OR negative

-Juleka is like "Yea, he is sad." shows picture of sad Luka. Though to be fair, that is a decent pic of him.

- So Alya is LAST to know. Double ouch.

-Marinette was crying in the bathroom, baby girl no!

-MARINETTE OMG! HOW DOES SHE HAVE THAT?!

-Alya out here trying to be a good friend. By showing Marinette she has support. (She aint even mad that she was last to find out. She is more concerned about her friend)

-THEY HAVE A SECRET HANDSHAKE!

-They calling her now

-She didn't answer. She is too sad

-So she won't detransform and talk with tikki. Can I PLEASE give her a hug. She needs it.

-Yo... Marinette has zero concern for herself and only detransformed when she thought it was causing strain on Tikki.

-Mylene offering friendship bracelets. Never change dear.

-Okay so are they witches now?

-Alix is like 'Can I not be in a ritual, Id rather give her some juice'

_________________

-Marinette sad cause Ladybug can't have a boyfriend. Cause even if she dated Adrien, it would be the same as it was with Luka.... Tikki knows that aint true but can't say why. UGH! This is pain

-Did Tikki just confirm Kwami can't fall in love? NO! MY CHEESECAKE!

-OH S***! So now she gonna be Perma ladybug?!

-So the girls showed up as soon as ladybug left. This isn't good.

-And of course Marinette is TOO GOOD at making s***, so they curious about the new dollhouse

-OH S*** THAT WAS CLOSE!

-And things going to s*** in 10, 9, 8

-Oh no... this... this is not good. Marinette sweetie no. No please.

-Look can we take a second and APPRECIATE HOW HARD ALYA AND THE GIRLS ARE GOING FOR MARINETTE! Did the writers see all of the alya salt and say 'Yea f*** that noise'? Cause I feel like they did.

-Okay so I know Marinette just didn't want to expose her secret... but damn girl... THAT was harsh.

-Marinette literally going scorched earth for being Ladybug... Okay, this episode PHYSICALLY hurts me. SHE DOESNT MEAN IT GIRLS. PLEASE DONT HATE HER.

-Shadowmoth could you not. Like seriously?! COULD YOU F***ING NOT! MY BABY GIRL IS IN PAIN AND I WILL GO THROUGH MY SCREEN AND [Redacted]

-And then you'll have to f*** sideways.

-So first 5 way akumatization

-So can we talk about how the last 3 akuma were after the secrets of Marinette. well 2, but the other one was Adrien. But still. A Lot of Hawkmoth saying 'F*** this individual in particular'

-THEY JUST WANT HER TO STAY THEIR FRIEND! OMG I CANT EVEN BE MAD.

-I wish I could understand Juleka. Can someone please just translate with what she is saying. It was funny in truth, but I want to know

-OH Timebreaker and Horrificator are BACK. Yay, I missed them

-Just realized how AMAZING their Gang of akuma are. Like damn, thats like a super team of evil. Yea sure

___________________________

-Not to nitpick, but Marinette, you should have led with that box.

-TRIXX IS GONNA USE HIS POWERS OMG FINALLY! A PURE KWAMI POWER. We haven't seen that since Plagg.

-Damn that was a really boss illusion trixx. But question, how was that out of control? Like if anything, that was BETTER then when the user used it.

-Trixx makes a really good point. WHY DOES HE NEED A HOLDER AGAIN?!

-OH, HE WAS LYING. EVERYTHING LOOKS F***ING BANANAS.

-Trixx is now my second favorite Kwami.

-PLAGG! MY SON! HE IS IN THE EPISODE! I MISSED HIM. Also, surprisingly knows.

-Plagg cares about other Kwami.

-Adrien just chilling, watching tv. XD

-Timebreaker casually committing murder

-Hold it, Okay so why are so many people in school right now? Ivan is there, chloé and Sabrina? Oh my tomato son too. Can someone tell me wtf is up with this school schedule?

-Fragrance/Reflekta Power combo is amazing.

-Wow, this gang is MEGA DANGEROUS

-So yea Ladybug. Maybe... idk... TALK WITH CHAT NOIR ABOUT YOUR PROBLEMS!?

-So they really gotta plan this time.

-Ladybug smart to disarm Ladywifi.

-Ladybug trying to get lady wifi to fight the akuma. This is touching

-SHE DID IT! ALYA BROKE FREE! LIKE A MOTHERF***ING BOSS.

-No, shadow moth, you's a b***

-Loving this Alya- Ladybug friendship

-Chat noir looking boss by fighting 3 akuma at once while on the phone. Chat noir Leveled up.

-So Ladybug can now pull the miraculous out of anywhere because she has guardian status. Thats a cool trick. Makes it much easier.

-Thats a secret tho, Alya got trusted with a big secret.

-RENA ROUGE IN THE HOUSE!

_______

-And Chat noir is captured... but in his defense. He did have to fight 4 at once this time. So that took longer than usual. So no shame kitty. You did well.

-Lucky charm is an inner tube

-Clever illusion. POINTS! Using the goal of the akuma to distract. Alya gets gull points!

-WOW! REALLY CLEVER ILLUSION.

-Ladybug suave catch of rose tho.

-So that was probably the best Group akuma attack since Heroes day (and honestly it probably tops it)

________

-Marinette patches things up with her friends. That is a relief. She was able to somewhat explain her issues up to the point. Without spilling the details.

-Marinette has some really good friends.

-Alya knows that not everything has been told... Hold on DONT TELL ME.

-Oh wow, Marinette is breaking down.... My poor baby girl is hurting real bad.

-OH S*** SHE SAID IT! SHE TOLD HER! SHE TOLD ALYA!

____________________________________________________________

wow this episode... This one hurt. This one hurt a LOT. But also, it was really good.

Okay so, 10/10.

I haven't been this enthralled with an episode in a long time.

Are there one or two nitpicks? Absolutely.

Do I wish somethings were not mentioned? A little bit.

Am I glad Alya knows? Out of everyone, she is the second person I wanted Marinette to tell.

(The first one being chat noir, but lets face it, we kind of knew that won't be happening for a while.)

So can Alya salt stop now? Cause Alya CLEARLY showed how much of a motherf***ing boss she is.

But damn I didn't feel this emotional since Chat blanc.

I DONT EVEN CARE THAT THE AKUMA WERE REPEATS.

That was OBJECTIVELY, one of the best episodes in the entire series.

This made me rethink my favorite episode. THATS HOW GOOD IT WAS.

Season 4, You keep doing what you are doing. Your writing (minus some very minor nitpicks) has been pretty damn good.

#ml #ml spoilers #ml gang of secrets #miraculous ladybug #gale reviews #my heart #I cant #I CANT EVEN #marinette dupain cheng

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theres-an-impulstor-among-us · 3 years

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Friday Night Stabby best quotes part 25 (02/07/21)

Skizz is missing from this session so he was replaced by PearlescentMoon.

…

*Etho and Tango are accusing each other of murdering Impulse* Brody: I’m voting for Endless. Endless: That seems legit.

...

Brody, dead: Remember when we were alive? Joker, dead: Yeah… Tango, dead: Good times.

...

Pearl: I happen to have killed Impulse twice in a row now. Impulse: Yeah, she’s so mad about Timmy. Pearl: Yeah, poor Timmy fell into the void- Tango: What?! Impulse: Nothing nothing nothing nothing starting! Don’t worry about it! STARTING!!! Evil, to Tango: You really should watch the other Hermit videos. Impulse: I forgot he was still here.

...

*the game has bugged and made Astro slow without being giant* Brody: Mrs Tango and Astro, do you guys feel bad at all? Cuz we were just talking about Astro being a giant and I’m pretty sure Tango just like died right there and I didn’t see anyone come in here. Astro: There were more important things to worry about than Tango. Evil: Wow… Astro: I took all of the steroids and everything, and all I got was up to normal size. I’m very offended by this game right now.

...

Evil: *calls emergency meeting* Evil: Hi! Brody: What’s up? Evil: I just wanted to say that I was done with my tasks and, you know, use the meta of resetting the cooldown by calling a meeting and telling you all I love you. Impulse: Smart. Etho and Mrs Tango: Aww! Brody, whispering: I hate you. *pause* Evil: Except that Brody guy. He’s kind of a jerk. Brody: I hate you!

...

Impulse: *calls emergency meeting* Impulse: Announcement! Announcement! Impulse, with the announcer voice modifier: I have an announcement to make! I am done with my tasks! *they proceed to vote Impulse out*

...

*some people start chanting “MVP! MVP!” at Joker for finishing his tasks* Endless: B-L-T! B-L-T! Evil: Look what Timmy [the pig] turned into. Impulse: Uh oh. Ouch. Too soon, Evil! Too soon! Don’t tell Tango, I don’t think he knows! Tango, deadpan: Yeah I don’t know anything about anything like that.

...

Impulse: So last round I got thrown out for hitting the button. This round, I’m Button Barry. THAT’s not good…

...

*after Impulse gets kicked and Astro automatically becomes host* Impulse: This is Astro’s lobby, everybody listen to Astro’s rules or ejection into space. Astro: Um… no making fun of people for being short. Impulse: Alright shorty, that’s enough rules for me.

...

Impulse: Watch me scan. *hops on the scanner* Alright, got it? Now watch me nae nae. Joker: Oh GOD. I’m outta here. Shut up. Impulse: *laughs* Joker: If I could kill you right now, I would.

...

Astro: Impulse, I have to know. What was the joke that I killed you for? Impulse: Oh, I said “watch me scan”, then I got on and I said “now watch me nae nae”. Astro: Yeah, you deserved to die.

...

Tango: Hey guys, I’m going up to O2 here. Just letting you know. *pause* Joker: Did you hear something? Impulse: I dunno, Tango-. He always talks. I dunno what that was about.

...

Joker: Yeaaah, but you are kind of weird, though. Endless: Just for that, I’m not gonna do any more tasks. Joker, laughing: Yes you are. *long pause* Endless: You’re right. Joker: I know. Endless: I’ll see you later. Joker: See you, buddy.

...

*Pearl wins as jester because nobody believed Impulse when he said it was Evil* Impulse, with the announcer voice modifier: Attention attention! I am playing with a shipful of idiots!

...

*after dying early* Impulse: I was looking forward to being Brody’s lover :( *pause* Impulse: That sounds bad.

...

Impulse: They’re just mad cuz I’m fast, that’s all. They jelly. They all jelly cuz I can get my tasks done like a boss. Joker: Who ARE you?! Impulse: *laughs* Joker: I’m hip with what the new kids say. Astro: I’m… going over here now. Joker: What the new kids say nowadays. Impulse: Oh dude! Got my wires straight right away, poggers! Joker: Poggers?! Impulse: That was lit. Joker: Shut up!

...

Astro: All I’m gonna say, judging by the level of tasks that are completing, people are not killing very well, and I’m actually done with my tasks before the first meeting even got called. Endless: You’re awfully judgy, Astro. Tango: Wooow, look at you. Joker: That’s harsh. Evil: Okay, Judgy McJudgerson. Impulse: Way to make the imposters cry themselves to sleep tonight. Jeez. Astro: There’s only two people I’m judging here and that’s the imposters. Step up your game.

...

Evil: Mrs T, I love you. You’re amazing, you know that? Mrs Tango: Aww…! I love you too. Evil: Obviously, you follow me on twitter.

...

*Impulse caught Etho dancing around a body* Etho, giggling: So here’s what happened. Impulse came out of O2 and he was like “Etho, don’t go in there”. Impulse: *bursts out laughing* Etho: And I was like- I’m gonna go in there, right? And he’s like “no, Etho, don’t go in there”. Tango: I- Okay. Etho: And then he closes the door on me. Tango: I think we can establish that Etho is the jester now, right? Okay. Etho: And I open the door, and then I go and I check and there’s a dead Joker. Tango: This is- Etho, stick to solving crimes, man.

...

(the same round) *Etho caught Tango and Endless killing* Etho, laughing: So Endless- He was like “Etho, don’t go in there”. *everyone laughs* Etho: And I was like “make me”. And he couldn’t, he couldn’t stop me. Endless: 100% not Etho. Etho: And then I caught Tango, and Tango was also like “Etho, don’t go in there”. Tango: Alright. Etho: So they’re the double killers; it wasn’t me. Tango: I am so confused right now!

...

*that same meeting, votes are revealed as being tied between Impulse and skipping* Impulse: WHAT?! Evil: What the-?! How did it land on Impulse?! Impulse, with the announcer voice modifier: Four of you are idiots.

...

(the same round) Etho: *calls emergency meeting* Endless: For god’s sake, Etho! Etho: Hey everybody :D *pause* Etho: Okay, so, Impulse and Pearl just went to specimen together and Impulse killed Pearl without any hesitation. Pearl: What do you mean? Endless: Pearl’s not dead! Pearl: I’m still alive! Tango: Oh my gosh. Evil: Etho! Why are you doing this?! Etho: Vote Impulse. Tango: Has he been drinking?!

...

*the same meeting, the votes are tied between Tango and Impulse* Tango: OH my GOSH! Evil: Oh my god! Impulse, with the announcer voice modifier: Three of you are idiots. Endless: Well, you convinced one of them, Impulse. Brody: Pearl, aren’t you happy you joined us for this nonsense?

...

(that same round) *Etho’s body is reported* Evil: The Endless had had enough of Etho’s… stuff and cut him in half right in front of me. Endless: Let’s discuss this, Evil. *pause* Endless: We both know it was Impulse.

...

(later in the same meeting) Impulse: Let me explain, Endless. The better play would’ve been to say you were sheriff and you picked up on the fact that Etho was trying to overplay jester but he was actually covering up for the fact that he was imposter. But now that you haven’t done that- Endless: Don’t tell me how to play this game, Impulse. Astro was clearly morphed as me. Impulse: Oooookay. Astro: Where did I come into this conversation?!

...

(after the round) Astro: So Impulse, you kept saying there were four idiots. There wasn’t, there was just one idiot. Evil: *laughs* Astro: An idiot who voted for you every round. Impulse: What?! Astro: I used my mayor votes on you and I was committed at that point.

#friday night stabby quotes #friday night stabby #impulsesv #tangotek #pearlescentmoon #etho #astrozoan #evilnotion #brodyman #theendless #mrstango #misterjoker

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wonda-cat · 3 years

Text

Some Thoughts on Tommy’s most recent stream (4/29)

(For the record, this isn’t going to be like my other formal analyses. I’m genuinely just ranting here, possibly unedited too. I’m only referring to the characters, unless stated otherwise.

Also obvious warning, this will be fairly negative/critical of the DSMP’s writing, so scroll past if that might bother you. I tend to criticize the media I love, so this is just par for the course in my case.)

Let’s start off with—

The Things I Liked

All of the comedy at the beginning of the stream was wonderful. Ghostbur was incredibly endearing and entertaining as usual, as well as the moments between bench trio. Tommy’s change of plans made sense and the entire journey through the prison was tense and fun to watch. As well as the moment Tommy got caught (it was inevitable.)

It goes without stating, but cc!Wilbur and cc!Tommy’s acting was wonderful—they knocked it out of the park. I liked the little moments of Tommy calming Ghostbur down as Sam screamed at him. I also loved Wilbur's speech about his time in the afterlife when bench trio found him.

As well as the moment with Wilbur admiring the sky and calling it ‘his sunrise.’ I’m also glad that the afterlife was explained to be caused by the Revival Book’s existence and not some general eternal torture every character will be sentenced to regardless of anything they did in life.

But, sadly, that’s about where I stop and have to go into what I didn’t like as much, which is—

Everything Else

I’ll be talking about my major gripes with this particular stream in later bullet points down the line, but for now I’ll bring up the little things that annoyed me. This is all basically nit-picking and isn’t as awful or badly written as some of the others I’ll be discussing later.

First off, Why is Ranboo There? In the stream before this one, Tommy had Tubbo promise to not tell anyone else about their plan. Did he just decide to tell Ranboo anyway? Why? What was the point of asking him to keep it secret if it didn’t matter?

Adding to this, Tubbo and Ranboo were rather unnecessary for any of the other scenes that took place. They didn’t have any meaningful conversations with Tommy besides Ranboo asking why he was dreading Wilbur’s revival so much, as well as Wilbur’s comments to Tubbo about him being president. But other than that they have little to no notable speaking lines.

They don’t Do Anything? Sure, they’re nice to have present so Tommy can vent to someone else and find comfort but, in the end, Ranboo was oddly angry and accusatory with Tommy and Tubbo was practically absent from the scene. The impression I got from Tommy and Tubbo’s conversation in the previous stream implied that Tubbo would be serving a larger role as a distraction, but I guess they changed gears or something?

Then we have Ghostbur’s involvement, which, yeah, makes sense. Tommy, Tubbo, and Ranboo are not allowed inside the prison, so it’s best to find someone else who can get in without suspicion. But my first assumption, upon seeing Ghostbur with the group was, “Oh, he’s gonna go in there and Dream’s gonna use him to revive Wilbur. That’s the only reason why Ghostbur is here and not anyone else, who would also be willing to kill Dream. It’s not like they’re in short supply right now.”

And I ended up being right, which only frustrated me more. I wanted something unexpected. Something new. Something interesting. Yet, I got the most predictable outcome instead—Tommy fails, Wilbur is revived.

Next, we have another big serving of ‘Tommy gets blamed for things he has no control over’ part 241. I am so, so sick of characters getting unreasonably mad at and blaming Tommy for anything and everything. It’s not new, it’s not interesting, it’s not fun. It’s just miserable.

It is,, awful. And it’s highkey frustrating. I refuse to sit through another arc of Tommy being endlessly hurt and blamed for stuff he didn’t do or cannot control. Pick a new event in the plot.

Try something out of left field. Do something, anything different to this. I’m begging you.

Now, we get into the major writing pitfalls and shortcomings. Starting with—

We Need to Talk About Sam

I have no idea what is going on with Sam’s character right now. It is so genuinely confusing. I have no clue why Sam reacted the way he did to Tommy because it just doesn’t make any sense. Sam’s entire inner conflict is about him trying to cultivate and protect his humanity and morality while upkeeping a strict, closed-off demeanor.

He follows the rules, even if it hurts the people he loves. Even if these codes force him into a position to be unethical. He feels it is his responsibility should anything go wrong or if Dream escapes, because it puts others in danger.

His strict approach got Tommy killed, and it also took a life and an arm from Ponk. Both of these people are precious to him. So why on earth would he threaten to kill Tommy when, in their last interaction, he was glad he was alive—after he promised to never let something like that happen again?

He respected Tommy’s wishes to stay away from him, and rather politely too. Why would he then threaten to kill him just after weeks of saying Tommy’s death was his biggest regret? That’s not even touching on Sam saying, “This is why I let you die,” as well as blaming Tommy for something that was directly a result of his own refusal to act.

Why didn’t he have Ghostbur also hitch a ride on the same platform with Tommy? Why did he even let Ghostbur into the prison in the first place if he:

A.) Told Ranboo he wasn’t going to let anyone in there after what happened to Tommy.

B.) Also wouldn’t let people in lest they find out about Quackity’s plan.

C.) Couldn’t even kill Ghostbur because he’s incorporeal and thus cannot fully upkeep the contracts he is signing.

There’s also the issue of Sam breaking the rules he abides by when he decided to not kill Tommy after he snuck into the prison, despite it being in the contract. Why is it different now? He went against his own protocol but was also following it by refusing to let Ghostbur come back to the other platform?

Why does Sam refuse to listen to Tommy? Their argument is mind-numbingly ridiculous. Sam refuses to hurt Dream, despite him only being alive because Sam claimed Tommy wanted him alive.

But now Tommy is there, begging Sam to let him kill Dream, and Sam just goes, “No. We’re not killing Dream.” Fucking why??? Sam! You said you wanted to kill Dream at least four times by now! Maybe more!

You were on your way to do it with Quackity and the only thing that stopped you was your promise to Tommy. But now Tommy’s here, telling you to kill Dream and you fucking won’t???? I am absolutely baffled.

No matter how you spin it, it makes no fucking sense. However, if I tried,,, I could possibly come up with a reason or two. Maybe Dream is blackmailing him. Maybe Quackity is forcing him to keep Dream alive until he can get the info he needs (even though,,, why would he trust Quackity over Tommy, who he’s outwardly stated he trusts just as much, if not more?)

It feels like these plots are dancing around each other, trying to keep up this faux sense of conflict that doesn’t exist. But, here’s the thing, contrived conflict is never compelling. I can’t overstate it enough.

Dream’s Plan is Complete Nonsense

The method to revive Wilbur makes Dream seem even more short-sighted than I remember commenting on, during the stream where Tommy was brought back to life. He told Tommy that his plan was to test the book to see if it worked (which, okay fine, I can buy this.) But then he says all along he was planning to revive Wilbur in order to break out of prison, which is ???? This is baffling if he needed Ghostbur in order to pull this off.

Which,,, I can’t even begin to explain how ridiculous it is that Dream’s entire plan hitched on not only the book working on people to begin with (which he tested on Tommy,,, for some reason, even though he would’ve lost his ‘favorite toy’ if he fucked it up. Which,, why even take that chance in the first place? there are other visitors he could’ve tried this with, surely. Like Sapnap and Bad,,) and it also relied on Ghostbur voluntarily going into the prison just to visit Dream?? And if he didn’t need Ghostbur after all, then why didn’t he bring Wilbur back weeks ago?

That’s not even getting into the issue of Dream assuming that Wilbur, once brought back, would:

A.) Want to be alive in the first place.

B.) Actually be willing to help Dream, instead of telling him to fuck off.

C.) Be even slightly capable of helping him at all when he has no allies, no PVP skill, no weapons, no armor, and no knowledge of the prison or its innerworkings.

Why are the current DSMP writers so committed to making me think Dream is a fucking idiot? I don’t enjoy this. I used to like his character and think he was smart. Stop.

ALSO, why did Tommy or Tubbo or Ranboo not think of the possibility that Ghostbur could very well be necessary to revive Wilbur? Why did that not cross any of their minds? It was the first thing I thought of when I saw him.

Another big thing that irks me is Tommy and Sam saying they saw Dream physically holding the Revival Book, which,,, how? Why? Dream said in previous streams that he burned the book and that was entirely the thing that kept him from being killed outright. If there was a book still in existence, did he hide it somehow?

How did Quackity not find it? Why did Sam not take it from him when he was first arrested?? What?

Also how the fuck did Dream kill a ghost?? They’re incorporeal? How does he not need the body to perform necromancy? That seems almost redundant.

Also it took a matter of seconds to perform? It took,,, ?? nothing but words and sheer willpower to bring someone back to life? Why does it seem so easy? My mans just,, uses his vibes to bring people back from the dead???

Unless the book has instructions regarding that or has a proportional price in order to use, then I’d be more forgiving. But I’m guessing it doesn’t have too steep a cost if Dream could offer Tommy immortality despite that. But I’m sure we’ll get more information on this once Quackity (inevitably) gets his hands on the book. Hopefully…

Which brings me to my last point—

Wilbur’s Revival (Derogatory)

Since the Revival Book was introduced, I have been actively dreading Wilbur being revived. It is the most predictable, low-hanging fruit of a plotline I could possibly conceive of. I understand that he’s a fan-favorite with a large audience (I love Wilbur more than you’d expect. cc!Wilbur is actually the reason I got into the DSMP in the first place), but there are other characters who could be developed more—utilized more.

Unpopular opinion, I know, but I am just so incredibly unenthused about this plot development. In fact, I’d almost go so far as to say hate it.

The Revival Book in and of itself is my least favorite thing the DSMP has ever introduced. It is a lack of consequences simplified. It’s also a lack of commitment to those mortal consequences.

It is a ‘get out of jail free’ card for when they kill off a character and don’t want to deal with the hole that character will leave behind. Or a way to work around the reason they shouldn’t kill Dream on the spot.

With Wilbur back again, I no longer feel compelled by his arc the way I used to. There is nothing to really leave a lasting impact anymore. Of course, there was a cater where L’Manburg once stood, but that was dug even deeper later on. You can’t make the death of a friend, of a loved one, worse than it is. It is death.

The thing I found extremely interesting about Wilbur’s death is the way the other characters portrayed loss. It has consistently been the thing that was most comforting to me, oddly enough. When people die, there will always be loose ends.

There will be holes left behind and things left unsaid. An unfulfilled promise. A forgotten relationship. A hollow memory.

What I always found compelling was the way Tommy and Fundy and Niki took this mutual loss and had to live with it. How they had to come to terms with the fact that Wilbur was gone and he wasn’t coming back. That they had to make peace with his memory, his legacy, and their connection to him.

That they’d miss him and love him or hate him and try to forget him. It is a tragedy that someone like Wilbur wanted to die for so long, and in the end, he did. Because in reality, the people you love will die.

There may be someone in your life that leaves you behind and all you’re left with is the broken pieces. And it is how these characters move on that brings me bittersweet company as someone who’s lost a lot of people. There is nothing more irritating than a story going back on its establishments—to have their cake and eat it too.

All I want is the bare minimum—a story with narrative stakes and consequences.

The only way I could ever see myself enjoying this plot development is if Wilbur has a redemption arc and attempts to make amends with Tommy, Fundy, Niki, and Eret. OR if he aids in Dream’s downfall in some way and enjoys the simple realities of life and wants to live for the sake of living. I’d find that at least new and somewhat interesting.

But if he’s just here to be a moustache toiling villain (or somehow worse than after his previous downward spiral), when the market is already so deeply oversaturated with antagonists, then I will probably drop the series altogether.

Hopefully it doesn’t come to that because I love the Dream SMP and I want to keep loving it for as long as I can.

I will hold onto more reasons to stay, so long as they keep giving them to me.

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newtonsheffield · 3 years

Note

Hi! I loveee your B&S Universe and really have fallen for your Matthew/Edwina HCs....I was wondering if I could request some more? Maybe the two of them running into Edwina's unworthy exes?

Hello!!!

I am very pleasantly surprised by how much everyone seems to love Edwina and Matthew Goose Bagwell. I just think Edwina is such a sweetheart and even though she has such a high profile career she is at heart a very down to earth, quiet person, and so she needs a humble little bean like Matthew to just hang out with at the end of the day, go to pottery classes with. You know, wholesome adorable things. It’s no less than she deserves.

Play the theme song! ‘Eddie and Goose, Eddie and Goose, Two little sunshine kiiiiids.”

“Eddie Sheffield? Oh my god, It’s been ages!” A man’s voice called out, and Matthew thought nothing of it. People recognising his fiancée happened semi regularly, and Edwina was always in her element with people, it warmed Matthew’s heart to see, but apparently This Man, she most certainly did not want to see. Se had stilled immediately, her fingers, intertwined with his where they sat tucked against her waist clenched tightly, her engagement ring cutting into his hand for a brief second as she muttered “Ugh, For Fuck’s sake.” as she turned towards him.

And Matthew didn’t like the way he was eyeing her appreciatively, no predatorily, for one second. Matthew liked to think he wasn’t a jealous man, Edwina was a beautiful woman, it was undeniable that wherever they went people’s eyes seemed to follow her, and it truly didn’t bother him. He knew they were in a committed relationship and she loved him. She told him every day, multiple times a day, like a relentless little shower of affection. Then there was the way she made him lunch, tucked neatly away in his lunch box, had done from the very first day she’d stayed at his flat. He’d been on the way out of the door and she’d called out Don’t forget your lunch, Matt! He’d paused, turning around confusedly, because he hadn’t packed anything only to have her stand on her tiptoes, kiss his cheek and push a lunchbox with Indiana Jones on into his hands. He’d opened it, a little curiously at lunch and found a note tucked inside Stay away from any rolling boulders today ❤️ Eddie. He’d seen her that night and said Lunch was beautiful but you don’t have to do these things, She’d sighed, shrugged her shoulders and said It makes me happy, to look after you, so Can I? She loved him, he was sure. So no one else really mattered, but this Man was leering at her, and something about it made Matthew want to punch him.

“David, It has been a while.” Edwina said, her voice monotone, bored almost. David appeared not to notice. “We should catch up. You know, for ahh Old time’s sake.” David said moving his eyebrows suggestively in time with the words, His eyes never leaving Edwina, Matthew felt his fist clench. Eddie sighed. “I don’t think so.” She tugged on Matthew’s arm, wrapping it even more tightly around herself. David hummed, “Yeah I heard a funny rumour about you. Said you were getting married.” “Not really a rumour if my Mum put an engagement announcement in the paper is it?” Edwina said bemusedly, shooting. Can you believe this dick? Look at Matthew who felt his chest puff a little with pride, a smirk coming to his face. “This is Matthew, with his arm around me, he’s my fiancé.” Edwina said dryly. And for the first time David seemed to notice him. His eyes widened a little, and then, this absolute tool of a man, had the audacity to smirk.

“This guy? Wow. Eddie. Your sister’s married to Anthony Bridgerton and you’re gonna marry this guy?” David said, chuckling to himself, and Edwina frowned, her mouth open to an angry retort but Matthew beat her to it. “Mate, I’m gonna have to ask you to be more respectful.” He said, as pleasantly as he could manage, David’s eyes flicked to him, crossing his arms in front of him, trying to make himself look bigger, it was all Matt could do not to roll his eyes at the ridiculous display. “You think I should respect you?” Matthew could feel Edwina’s eyes on him. He scoffed. “I don’t care what you say about me, but I’m not going to let you stand here and disrespect my wife. She used to be your girlfriend, and she’s a human being, show some bloody respect.” Matthew said firmly, trying to tamp dow the anger rising in his chest. David was clearly ready to start something, and Matthew readied himself to push Edwina out of the way when she laughed, very brightly and said. “Oh, don’t worry about that, David and I were just friends weren’t we?” And then she tugged on his arm and left David standing there, open mouthed in indignation.

“So that’s the kind of guy you dated hey?” Matthew said gently, when they were alone again, “That walking advertisement for toxic masculinity.” Edwina’s brow furrowed, her lip caught between her teeth. “I don’t even know why I did. I wanted to see the best in him, and I don’t know, I think I convinced myself that if everyone expected me to just be a pretty face, then that’s all I was.” She said, refusing to look at him, her eyes trained down on her shoes, and Matthew’s heart clenched. Edwina’s sister had pulled him into a tight hug, not so very long ago and whispered in his ear how desperately glad she was that he was in Edwina’s life, and he hadn’t quite believed her.

Matthew reached out, tilting her chin up so their eyes locked together, forcing her to feel the truth in his words. “Eddie you are absolutely, stunning. So beautiful that every time I look at you I can’t even believe you looked at me twice when I ran into you and Edmund, but more importantly you are kind and smart, and strong, and funny and those are the things I love about you okay?” Her eyes were shining with tears as she stood on her toes and sealed their lips together, her body finally relaxing against his. She was smiling when they pulled apart, that same beautiful smile that had made his breath catch the first time he’d ever seen her. “I love you too. And don’t think I didn’t clock you calling me your wife before. I really loved that.” And it was all Matthew could do not to whoop for joy and spin her around in his arms right there on the street corner when he said “you better get used to it then.”

And yeah, maybe he spun her around a little just for good measure.

#matthew goose bagwell says no too toxic masculinity #matthew goose bagwell says that's my WIFE #bridgerton and sons au #edwina x matthew #edwina x goose #edwina x bagwell #edwina sheffeild #edwina sharma #matthew goose bagwell #molly's asks and answers

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pinktwingirl · 3 years

Text

Loki Series Rewrite (AKA Loki Series But With Squirrel Girl) Ep 4

INT. TVA - DAY

Mobius and Ravonna are talking.

RAVONNA

Every moment those variants are out there, we're all in danger.

MOBIUS

I'm working on it; Doreen's locket is charging... It should be ready any second now-

Just then, an AGENT enters, holding the locket.

AGENT

Sir, we got a location.

MOBIUS

Well, there you go.

AGENT

He's on Lamentis-1, 2077. I can only assume she's there with him.

MOBIUS

That's not good... We need to get them, fast.

INT. TIME THEATER - DAY

After Loki and Sylvie are apprehended and Loki is stuck in the time loop, Mobius interrogates him in the time theater.

LOKI

You betrayed me!

MOBIUS

No, you betrayed me! You followed that variant when I explicitly told you not to, and now you're working with her?!

LOKI

How did you find us?

MOBIUS

Oh, well, you can thank your friend Doreen for that. You know, she went through all the trouble of fixing it when it was broken just to find you.

Loki's eyes widen.

MOBIUS

You know, I have no idea why she bothers putting up with you. At first, I thought, "well, maybe, she's smart. Maybe she sees something in you that I don't." But now, I think maybe she's just being naïve and she's wasting her time and trust on someone who doesn't deserve it.

Loki grits his teeth.

MOBIUS

How long have you been working for the variant?

LOKI

Me? Working for her? Please.

MOBIUS

Okay, so, if you're not working for the variant, what is it? You're partners?

LOKI

Absolutely not. She's... difficult and... irritating, and... she tries to hit me all the time!

Mobius raises an eyebrow.

LOKI

No. Not partners, no.

MOBIUS

Yeah, I guess you don't do partners. Unless, of course, it benefits you and you intend to betray them at some point, like you'll probably do with Doreen.

LOKI

It was a means to an end, Mobius. Welcome to the real world. Down there, we're awful to one another to get what we want.

MOBIUS

And now I gotta have a prince tell me how the real world works? Look, if you're not gonna cooperate here, I'm just gonna have to send you back for another round in the time loop...

LOKI

Wh-No, wait! Wait, wait, wait.

He pauses for a moment, and Mobius sits back down.

LOKI

Of course it was me pulling the strings all along.

(Beat)

She came to me on Asgard a long time ago... and then, she took me to one of her apocalypses... and that's where we hatched our plan together.

Mobius raises an eyebrow.

MOBIUS

Which is...?

LOKI

Coming along very nicely, thank you.

MOBIUS

And the variant?

LOKI

Doesn't matter. She's a pawn.

(Beat)

Something very, very big is going to happen, and when it does, I'll dispose of her.

MOBIUS

Well, we saved you the trouble there. She's already been pruned.

Loki's face falls.

MOBIUS

So, assume I do set you free. Does that-

LOKI

H-hang on, wait, what did you say?

(Beat)

MOBIUS

Assume I do set you free...

LOKI

The variant. She's gone?

MOBIUS

Yeah. Not before she took out two of ours. Yeah, she was going to her time cell, broke free, Hunter B-15 stepped in, popped her... So you might wanna fire off a thank-you note to Hunter B-15, because it looks like you're the... superior Loki. I would've bet on her, but... that's what makes a horse race.

Loki tries to look unaffected and shrugs.

LOKI

Good riddance.

After a pause, Mobius starts laughing, which irritates Loki.

LOKI

What? What's so funny?

MOBIUS

You know, for the god of mischief and lies, you really are a terrible liar.

LOKI

Is she alive?!

MOBIUS

Yes, she's alive. And I know that little story you told me was a lie too. So why don't we try this again, and you tell me the truth this time?

Loki clenches his jaw.

INT. TVA HOLDING CELL - DAY

Doreen slowly regains consciousness, blinking a few times before taking in her surroundings. She notices she is still in her ballgown and bound to a chair with handcuffs. She tries to use her strength to break the handcuffs off, but Ravonna enters.

RAVONNA

Save your energy. If you break those handcuffs off, they'll just put themselves right back together.

Doreen glares at her. Ignoring her warning, she uses her strength to snap the handcuffs off, but, like Ravonna said, they put themselves back together on Doreen's hands.

RAVONNA

Told you.

DOREEN

What do you want?

RAVONNA

I want to know what you saw in those restricted files you accessed. And I also want to know why you're working with Loki. He's a murderer and a liar.

Doreen scoffs.

DOREEN

Yeah, that's rich, coming from you. You're lying to all these people about who they are, and they don't even know it.

RAVONNA

That's different. It's a necessary lie.

DOREEN

There are no "necessary lies," only ones that benefit you at the expense of others. These people had families! Real homes! And you took that from them!

RAVONNA

We are preventing the universe from falling into chaos.

DOREEN

And at what cost?

RAVONNA

(losing her temper)

Whatever cost is necessary!

(She pauses.)

You know, despite what you may think, I am trying to help you.

DOREEN

I don't need your "help."

RAVONNA

Really? So you would rather side with the man that nearly enslaved your entire planet?

DOREEN

That was the past. He's changed.

RAVONNA

You know, I would think that someone as smart as you would be able to tell when they're being taken advantage of.

DOREEN

You don't know Loki.

RAVONNA

On the contrary, Ms. Green, I know everything about Loki. Every variant of him - they're all the same. Destined to be a selfish, lying murderer from the day they're born to the day they die.

DOREEN

That's not your choice to make! The only ones who get to decide who we are, are ourselves.

RAVONNA

Not as long as the timekeepers are around. Free will is a poison that leads to chaos. Having a set path to keep everything in its place is the only way to keep life in the universe safe.

(Beat)

Look... You can still do the right thing here. All I'm asking you to do is help me stop these Loki variants. With your help, we can save all living beings from their reign of chaos. We aren't your enemies, Doreen! The universe needs us to protect it... for all time.

After a moment, a scornful smirk grows on Doreen's face.

DOREEN

Yeah, you keep telling yourself that.

Ravonna glares at her. After a moment, she steps closer to Doreen.

RAVONNA

You wanna know what happens to you on the timeline?

Doreen's face falls.

RAVONNA

You'll spend the rest of your life hiding from people who either want to lock you in a prison or a lab cage. Did you really think running around stopping bank robberies was going to change how people see you? You're a mutant. A freak to the rest of the world. You will always be an outcast.

Doreen clenches her jaw, blinking away tears as Ravonna leaves.

INT. RAVONNA'S OFFICE - DAY

Mobius is talking with Ravonna, growing more and more suspicious of her.

RAVONNA

Case closed.

(She and Mobius clink glasses of whiskey.)

Cheers.

MOBIUS

Cheers.

RAVONNA

To putting all of this behind us. Now we just need to take care of sending the mutant girl home.

MOBIUS

Oh, hey, where is she, by the way?

RAVONNA

Holding cell 15.

Mobius frowns.

MOBIUS

You put her in a holding cell? Why?

RAVONNA

She's an associate of the variant. She could be working with him.

MOBIUS

Yeah, but we don't know that! She helped us find him! I don't see why she should be punished for a crime she hasn't even committed yet.

RAVONNA

I'm not taking any risks on this one, Mobius.

Mobius gives her a suspicious glance.

INT. TVA HOLDING CELL - DAY

After Mobius is pruned and Loki is reunited with Sylvie, Ravonna forces them into Doreen's holding cell. Loki's eyes widen when he sees Doreen is being held by two agents with a time displacement collar around her neck.

LOKI

Doreen...

In a last-ditch attempt, Doreen tries once more to break her handcuffs off. One of the agents shocks her with an electric staff, and she screams in pain. Loki glares at Ravonna.

LOKI

You said you wouldn't hurt her!

RAVONNA

Consider this a taste of your own medicine. Your break your promise, I break mine.

The agents release Doreen, who collapses to the ground, now sobbing. Loki rushes over to her and helps her up.

DOREEN

(Crying)

Loki... M-Mobius... It's my f-fault he's dead... I couldn't stop them... He was... I c-couldn't...I should've...

LOKI

No, Doreen, look at me. It's not your fault.

DOREEN

I sh-should've stopped them... I-I...

Exhausted, she passes out.

RAVONNA

(to Loki and Sylvie)

Once the timekeepers are ready, they'll deal with you.

(She gives a passing glance to Doreen.)

And once she's had her memories of the TVA wiped, we'll send her back to the main timeline where she belongs.

Loki glares at her as she and the agents leave them and lock the cell.

We cut to later, where Loki and Sylvie are looking after Doreen, who is lying unconscious on a bench in the cell.

LOKI

It's been at least an hour... Do you think we should try waking her up?

SYLVIE

She just had 50,000 volts of power forced through her body; I think we can let her rest a little longer.

Loki looks down at Doreen, still concerned.

SYLVIE

If she's not a variant, why did she come here? Who is she?

(Beat)

LOKI

She's... a mortal. One of the kindest I've ever known.

(He gently tucks a strand of stray hair behind Doreen's ear.)

Ever since we met, she's made a point of looking after me.

(He lets out a light laugh.)

I can't, for the life of me, understand why. I assumed it was just out of the goodness of her heart... Or, perhaps, just pity...

He looks up and sees Sylvie studying him with a curious expression. Before he can ask why, Doreen begins to stir.

DOREEN

Loki...?

He gently places a hand on her back as she starts to sit up. She glances at Sylvie, still regaining consciousness.

DOREEN

Oh, hey... Sorry I almost stabbed you in the face...

SYLVIE

Well, to be fair, I did kick you in the face, so I suppose we're even... Are you alright? Where'd you get the dress?

DOREEN

Oh... I had to go to Asgard to fix the locket. My clothes didn't exactly fit in, though, so I had to change.

LOKI

Well, that's why you should always rely on a genderfluid demigod to design your costumes. I know what works.

Doreen smirks.

DOREEN

Yeah, well, you weren't there, because I was too busy trying to save your ass!

(After a pause, her smile fades.)

Loki, everyone here... They're all variants too.

LOKI

I know. I told Mobius. That's why they...

(His voice trails off.)

DOREEN

I hacked into their database to get information on the agents... But Ravonna came after me before I could tell anyone. I'm so stupid! I never should've let my guard down!

SYLVIE

There'll be time for taking blame later. Did you find anything out about the timekeepers?

DOREEN

No... I'm sorry... I didn't get that good of a look... Oh! But good news for us, I did figure out why magic doesn't work in the TVA! I guess they have these things called "runes" set up around the whole area? So as long as those are active, your powers are useless.

Loki frowns.

LOKI

Well, how is that "good news" for us?

DOREEN

Because... Ravonna didn't count on me teaching Tippy-Toe how to hack into their systems and disable the runes, and also the time displacement collars, your welcome, which she should be doing right about...

The time displacement collars and handcuffs suddenly deactivate and fall to the ground.

DOREEN

Now!

As she stands up to move to the other side of the cell, Loki and Sylvie test their magic and see their hands are now glowing green.

SYLVIE

Oh, I like her.

They join Doreen at the other side of the cell.

DOREEN

Now, we just need to figure out a way to get out of here...

(Beat)

LOKI

You have the strength and speed of a squirrel, right?

DOREEN

Proportional strength and speed, yes.

LOKI

And squirrels have a jaw strength of around 7,000 pounds per square inch, right?

DOREEN

Right...

LOKI

Which means that, converted to your size, you should be able to chew through any metal wall, correct?

Doreen gives him a sour face.

DOREEN

I really don't like where you're going with this...

LOKI

Do you have any other plans for breaking out of an impenetrable steel cell?

Doreen sighs.

We cut to Doreen chewing through the wall and creating a tunnel to a corridor in the TVA. She spits out a piece of the metal and gags.

DOREEN

Uuuuggghhh, that was so gross!

(She climbs out of the tunnel.)

Okay, guys, you should be good to-

Before she can say another word, Loki and Sylvie use their magic to create another hole in the wall, and simply walk out of the cell.

DOREEN

Wh-?

(She turns to look at the hole they made.)

You could've just done that the whole time?!

LOKI

You did give us our magic back.

(Beat)

DOREEN

What did you just make me chew through the wall for, then?!

LOKI

Because it was amusing, of course.

SYLVIE

It was quite funny.

Doreen scowls at them.

DOREEN

You know, it was annoying enough having to deal with one Loki; now I have to put up with two of you?!

Loki and Sylvie laugh as she flips them both off. They each take a hand to help her to her feet.

DOREEN

Alright, I'll go gather some weapons and maybe get some more intel. You guys go take care of the timekeepers. I'll catch up with you later.

INT. TVA - MOMENTS LATER

Loki and Sylvie are running through a corridor, while Doreen goes the opposite way.

SYLVIE

Was it really a good idea to leave the mortal girl to take on all those agents by herself? Shouldn't we be helping her?

They stop running to see Doreen being ambushed by a group of agents. They try to prune her, but she uses the cape on her dress to temporarily blind them and kick the prune sticks out of their hands. She then jumps on top of the group as they all run in her direction and slams their heads together, knocking them all out simultaneously.

(Beat)

LOKI

She'll be fine.

SYLVIE

Yeah.

They continue running.

We cut to them running towards the timekeepers' chambers, when they run into Ravonna and several other agents, with their prune sticks ready.

RAVONNA

Right on time. The timekeepers are waiting for you.

Loki and Sylvie glare at her.

INT. TIMEKEEPERS' CHAMBERS - DAY

After discovering the timekeepers are fake, Loki turns to Sylvie.

LOKI

Sylvie... Trust me, we will figure this out.

SYLVIE

Not another pep talk, please...

LOKI

No, listen to me... We've come this far... We're not turning back now. We just need-

Before he can say another word, Ravonna prunes him.

@drawntothedarkside

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centuriantalevevo · 3 years

Text

Draco x Nonbinary Reader

Reader is AMAB, also this contains my headcanons lmao- hella OOC because of that (one of my headcanons, Draco has like.. multiple cousins who are basically on crack /j)

TW: transphobia and enbyphobia, with talk of biphobia. LGBTphobia in general. Misgendering

5th year is.. Hectic.. Especially for a certain kid, Y/N L/N, who had to deal with a literal pink toad this year. Like.. ew? What made it worse, was they seemed to be the only kid in the school, well Slytherin specifically, that was… Different. Not in the normal, cliche sense, where ‘oh Y/N was drop dead gorgeous but abused by everyone around her, she can sing amazing-’, no. This isn’t your typical x Reader story, Y/N was different in the sense of Identity, Gender, specifically Gender Norms. They seemed to be all alone on this feeling, a feeling of discomfort, a feeling of loneliness despite multiple friends being in the room with them at this moment. They were away from earth, where no words can hurt. Where the erasure cannot get to them.

Oh god did the words hurt.

Oh? What words? You’re about to find out.

“No, but did you hear some of the bullshit Umbridge was saying?” He asked, he as in the blonde. Draco. Draco Malfoy. “Especially to my cousin-” “You have a cousin?” Pansy asked, “Welcome to the conversation, first time speaking to me?- Yes, you are hella late to the conversation.” Draco groaned, “Now let me get back to the story” “Continue, which cousin? Darla?- Dominic?-” Blaise asked, “No, Jamie..” He responded quickly, “Oh hold on, what did the toad do to Jamie? I swear, if she hURT THAT PRECIOUS CHILD- Gryffindor or not, I love that girl to death” Blaise said quickly, interrupting Draco.

The blonde sighed deeply, “Blaise.. I love you to death but holy shit let me finnish, alright..” He took a breather, Y/N came back from their little world, queuing into the conversation. “Okay, so Umbridge had the AUDACITY to misgender MY COUSIN OVER AND OVER again! Misgendered her, invalidated her, you know that rule about like.. Something distance from the opposite gender? Yeah she’s forcing Jamie, a literal girl, to distance from girls and not guys-” He halted for a second, “No, my bad.. She’s forcing Jamie to stay away from both because she believe that Jamie is gay.. No, Jamie is a whole straight girl..” Draco ranted, “um.. Sorry to interrupt but… Jamie’s a girl? So how was she invalidated?” Y/N asked, tilting their head, Draco’s eyes moved to them, softening some.

“Oh, you didn’t know? I thought everyone knew. Jamie is trans, she’s a trans girl specifically”

THERE! THERE IT WAS! They weren’t alone now.. There was someone who understood, yet they’d been clueless this whole time.

“I swear I will jack that woman UP” Blaise said lowly and Draco nodded in agreement. “Jamie was CRYING when she came to me, she could barely speak. That poor girl passed out from crying so much. She felt so hurt and the amount of dysphoria she felt was astronomically high.” He sighed, even he wanted to cry. “Like, damn bitch you didn’t have to out yourself as a whole LGBTphobe, you could’ve just stayed quiet and it would cost you nothing yet you chose to mess with a child who is related to the MALFOY family, very smart yes mhmm..” He growled in aggravation “Only merlin knows what she’d do if there was a nonbinary in the school, she’s probably dehumanize them.” He shook his head.

“I’d commit a hate crime if I’m honest” Dominic said, coming from the stairs of the boys dormitory, “The LGBT had their way for a moment because she hadn’t thought about the gays, bisexuals and lesbians. Well.. the gays and lesbians, I don’t think she thinks Bisexuals exist..” He hummed, “She’s enforced the rule so now Darla can’t be near Daphne, luckily I don’t have a boyfriend.. The one time being single is a good thing.” Dominic dramatically cried.

“I will prove bisexuals exist, damn seems like I gotta stay away from ALL of you, sorry” Draco jokes, but was dead serious at the same time. “Until then, if there are nonbinaries in the school, technically they can by-pass the rules, if they present as masculine one day feminine the next. Or just androgynous to confuse the toad.” Draco then added, “I think I have to stay away from you guys too, shit Bisexuals can’t do ANYTHING” Blaise said, pretending to get up and leave.

So.. the students know of the nonbinary gender…

“Although, no surprise, Snape is always the decent one, along with all the other professors, and respect the trans kids pronouns, I’ve gone into his class to give him something during one of his lessons and heard him deliberately calling out kids that misgendered Jamie, it was amazing. And everyone says Snape is a bad teacher.” Draco says, smiling some at the memory. “Ooo! Speaking of which! While in Umbrdige’s class I think.. A few days ago, Snape actually found out about the incident and told her the fuck off for it-” “Damn, snape really said ‘trans rights are human rights’, go off honestly” Dominic interrupted, Draco nodded “The best look honestly, it was pure bliss watching that.” He responded.

Y/N finally managed to form words. “I.. didn’t know there was a trans person in the school.. A fellow trans person..” They said, mumbling the last part quietly, but Draco, Dominic, and Blaise caught it. “Fellow trans person?” Blaise tilted his head, and Draco glanced knowingly, the last part of their sentence was all he needed. They shook their head quickly, “Nothing” They shrugged, “Just nice to know”

It hurt, to be misgendered everyday, to be fair no one knew they were misgendering the kid. But they were so scared of being erased, discriminated against, that they said nothing. Since 1st year, pretty much.

They stretched some, “I'm gonna head to the library, I need to get studying done for Defense Against the Dark Arts, I’ll talk to you guys later.” They smiled, getting up, and grabbing paper, a quill, ink and their books from their dorm. Speed walking out, though it didn’t take long to hear a second pair of footsteps racing after them. Who the-

“Hey, Y/N..” Draco trailed of, catching up to them quickly, “What’s up?” They looked at him from the corner of their eye, “There’s something you never told anyone, isn’t there?” He asked. Y/N averted their eyes and shook their head, “Nn… No..?” They sounded unsure, “Is that a statement, or a question because you don’t know?” He asked. He didn’t wanna be rude, but this was the only way he could truly confirm. If there was someone he had been accidentally misgendering, he wanted to stop that quickly.

“I don’t wanna sound rude, nor put you on the spot.. You don’t have to answer if you don’t want to but.. What are your pronouns?” he asked, he knew of the nonbinaries, he knew of them.. So it’s fine to tell him, yes? He was basically defending them. They shook their head, not ready yet. “Not ready? That’s fine, I can respect that. You can always tell me, you know that right? I’ll understand. And if not me, then Jamie will.” heHe had sincerity in his voice, Y/N simply nodded. “Noted, thanks Draco..” They smiled and headed to the Library.

The next day, Defense Against the Dark Arts was boring as ever, all because of Umbridge. But she had a new lesson today, not the normal one though. She had been doing her usual bullying of Jamie, Draco had been on edge and heard about it earlier, fairly quickly too. It was like it was her MISSION to be an LGBTphobic idiot with no life. Jamie had mentioned nonbinaries before she dipped from class, arguing about trans in general with the woman, or.. Monster.. Both terms work. So she was now here, in front of kids, spewing out enbyphobic shit, and not planning on stopping.. Y/N was starting to cry, but tried their best to hold it in.

The first person to notice the distress was Draco, Hermione did too, as she sat behind Y/N but could see them jolting some, “These.. Non-binaries, are less than human. You’re either a boy, or a girl. Everyone agrees, yes? If you are born a girl, you’re a girl. If you’re born a boy, you’re a boy. It’s a mental disorder, and you need to be fixed-” “They’re normal.. They just happen to not feel like a guy or a girl..” Y/N said quietly, “Trans folk are human, they aren’t an it.. That’s incredibly hurtful..” They said, it took all their strength to keep their voice from cracking.

“What was that Mr. L/N?” Umbridge smiled that sweet yet disgusting smile, tilting her head.. No, that smile had more dangerous intent behind that. They flinched. “Is there something you would like to say sir?” She asked, stopping in front of them. “Trans people.. Are people.. Just because you’re too ignorant to learn doesn’t.. M..mean you- b-bring someone down b-beca-use of it..” Their voice started to crack, they hiccuped some. “I’m sorry.. Do you think you have more knowledge than me?” She asked, her tone was dangerous. “Y..yes. Clearly, I’ve d-done my research on this, th-there is science tha-at defends us” They said.

“Detention Mr. L/N.. For talking back to a teacher, when I am giving a lesson you are to listen, you’re too caught up in whatever freak show you tra-” Umbridge was cut off, “Don’t you DARE finish that damn sentence, I can promise you I am not against hitting a teacher and a woman at that.” Draco intervened, “There is a lot of science that backs transgenders up, plenty of brain science has shown there is a female and male brain, that’s what backs up trans girls and trans boys, the nonbinary is still being researched, but I can assure you it is much more than a mental illness. Yes, dysphoria is a disorder, it CAN be treated, it can be treated with Hormone Replacement Therapy, or HRT. It can be treated with transitioning. Some nonbinaries transition, some don’t feel dysphoric enough to transition, but at the end of the day they are still a they, I am still a he, and you are still a she. Just imagine if someone called you ‘he’, or even ‘it’ because they didn’t believe you were actually a girl-” “DETENTION, for BOTH of you.” Umbridge screamed, glaring daggers at both of them.

“I’d take detention over hearing another second of the erasure, you’ve hurt my cousin enough, I’ll gladly take the blow for her. I thought Snape would’ve taught you.” Draco muttered, staring at her, “Both of you, leave. Now.” She said with a huff, Draco grabbed his things, but stopped Y/N when they tried to collect theirs, getting it for them, “Come on.” He said softly, leaving the classroom with the student.

He handed their things to them gently, “I.. Noticed you got really upset..” He said softly, “More like panicked..” They said softly, “It’s easier said than done, but try not to let her get to you. Some people just choose to stay stupid. Sometimes even I hurt from some of the shit she says. Damn the amount of biphobia I have heard from her is ungodly.” He sighed, “You’re bi?” They asked curiously, “Yeah, I thought it was obvious by now. I kinda stopped caring at like.. 2nd year, hell I made out with.. A lot of guys in 2nd and 3rd year, mostly to piss my father off because he’s also LGBTphobic, but also just because it’s fun, and guys are cute.” He said with a small grin, they laughed. “Fair enough, do what you can to piss the oppressors off” They joked, drying their eyes. He turned to head to the Slytherin Common Room, when their voice ringed out again.

“They/Them..” Y/N said, he turned around and tilted his head, “You asked what my pronouns are.. I use they/them. I’m nonbinary” They said softly, and Draco smiled with a nod. “Is there a different name you want to be called?” But they shook their head, “The name I introduced myself as is the name I want to use.” Y/N said, “Alright, come on. Lets go to the common room” Draco said, “I can probably try and get Jamie in there too..” He hummed softly.

Later that day, it was after dinner, and all the Slytherins were in the common room. Aside from Draco and Y/N, “Do you want to tell them? Most of them are accepting, aside from a few exceptions, Pansy surprisingly is accepting.” He said quietly, and thought for a moment.. “Blaise told me a few of the kids got told off because they agreed with us.” He added, “I think.. I was always scared to say anything because I didn’t wanna be made fun of.. I didn’t know there was someone who was trans like me til you talked about what happened with Jamie..” They said, “Well, you’re safe here. Hell, I’m more than 110% sure that our headmaster is gay, so.. Do with what you will on that information” He said with a small lighthearted laugh, Draco kissed their cheek with a small hum “It’ll be okay.”

They’d chosen to tell them, they didn’t want to feel misgendered any longer, Umbridge aside. “Oi, everyone shut your trap for a second, I have something to say- THEO… Thank you” He said, after staring down Theodore for a moment. “Let us reintroduce someone, but properly this time. This is Y/N, they’re nonbinary, use they/them pronouns and the moment I hear any of you say something against that, I will personally come for you, with Jamie in tow.” Draco said, Y/N smiling a little with a small wave. “Could’ve told us sooner, but glad you did, especially after Professor Umbridge, good job” Blaise said.

Even Pansy was accepting, they were all proud that you had the courage to say come out, and also that you said something to Umbridge.

This was fine, everything is fine. Umbridge wasn’t fine, but.. This was nice, being accepted as who you are, by people who you’d think would be the last people to ever accept you. The person you thought would be the last person to accept you ended up being the most accepting, which is ironic when you consider his dad.

This was bad 😭

#draco malfoy #draco x reader #nonbinary reader #TW// transphobia #TW// misgendering #hella OOC because of my own headcanons-#harry potter universe

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sanstropfremir · 3 years

Text

kingdom episode 3 baby!!!!

listen. i’m not gonna lie i was nervous as hell for this episode. i saw that preview like everyone else and unfortunately i have ears so i was convinced the ateez stage was going to be a trainwreck. i was absolutely banking on sf9 and skz to do something even mildy interesting to save me from the ear damage and having to talk to extensively about why that disaster happened. but somehow i woke up in an alternate universe and you know what? with the exception of that high note the ateez stage fucked. i know. i don’t believe it either. i think i’m still in shock.

i’ll do individual breakdowns in order of favourites within the episode and then at the end i’ll put my personal ranking of all six. thank god i don’t have to do a stage breakdown again; if they change it again for next week i will scream.

ateez

a miracle happened. i don’t have to fight any of the staff at kq. i don’t understand either. jongho is so fucking lucky that the rest of the group pulled all that energy out of their asses because if they had been even a single iota less serious about it that stage would have flopped worse than a dead fish. i can’t believe we got this level of camp b movie schlock in the first full stage, and they stuck the landing. incredible.

fine i’ll address the elephant in the room. personally, i don’t think jongho is that good of a vocalist. he’s not bad, and he does have the potential to be a good vocalist, he just doesn’t have the training, and this is the issue with all of ateez. hanya talked about this before and i’ll say it again: he can’t switch to his head voice and he’s destroying his vocal cords by attempting to hit notes in his mid range that he should just jump to head voice for. frankly i’m surprised he got anywhere close to that note in his mid, but his technique is just not there and he’s gonna do some real damage to his voice if he doesn’t take a break and also get a good vocal coach. you can already hear the degradation in sound from their debut stage to now, and that’s in less than three years. ok i’m done talking about vocals that’s hanya’s turf, i’m pretending that that high note doesn’t exist and we’re moving on. also im in love with btob’s reaction it was fucking priceless.

costume

look, i have a one track brain and that brain can only think about seonghwa corset. seonghwa corset? seonghwa corset.

i know it’s not a real corset nor is it properly laced and i know this would never happen in a million years but a kpop mr pearl trend? i would die. just fully expire. there’s no coming back from that for me

yes i have laced boys into proper corsets before and yes it is as hot as you think it is (when it’s not work related, obviously)

ok now that i’ve got that out of my system for the moment, the costumes are actually pretty good. i’m a little obsessed with hongjoong’s coat although I know it’s stupid. fur? always, I love it, you’ll never change my mind it makes everything better. i own a lot of it and i wear it all the time. this is also a pretty good example of how to do a more modern styling within a very specific and recognizable genre.

i don’t hate the backup dancers’ costumes either, even though they would look a lot better in a not-pirate themed hiphop stage. because there is already a modern tint with the boys’ costumes, it’s not that much of a leap to the dancers, and they actually use the dancers and the camera really strategically to not put much focus on them.

the only real standout issue is the blacklight/contortionist moment, which is too gimmicky for me and doesn’t fit the rest of the theme. i do understand the purpose of them: you need a transition point from the upper deck to the more fantastical inner ship area, and blacklight paint is a really easy, cheap, and fast way to get four new costumes instantly. do i think they could have done something better though? yes.

set

this was actually a smart reuse of that pirate ship set. i know i clowned on them in the first stage that they could move on from the pirate gimmick but honestly? i’m glad they didn’t. this was fun as fuck. but also two stages was enough you can move on now.

i love how they actually used the weird double stage function that the false prosc creates for an actual architectural and narrative effect, instead of just sort of operating as though it’s just another place to travel just because you can. we are on the deck of the ship, and then we go inside the ship. it’s simple and effective. you don’t need to do a crazy amount of crossover to establish a dynamic sense of place.

i hate the ateez kingdom logo. i hate the ateez logo in general. get it out of there, at least you could have made something more fun and pirate themed.

would have loved to have seen them return to the hourglass at the end, especially if they got one that was specifically set for 4 minutes. would have been a nice bit of symmetry but i suspect it was struck before the kraken bit.

the kraken bit??? i was not at all expecting that and honestly? dope as hell. that big tentacle is just a custom inflatable santa claus that you see around christmastime and what a brilliant use of such a simple mechanic, especially to have it come through that weird little triangle arch they have upstage. smart way to use the existing architecture.

yes it is a gimmick but here’s why it works rather than just looks tacky like every other gimmick we’ve seen so far: it had a function within the narrative. this is so important. show us there’s a reason it’s there!

lighting

i didn’t love it but they did actually make some smart choices. the outer deck is warmer toned and has some good atmospheric effects, and the inner deck is cold tone and specifically lit with pin lights to imitate the light coming through portholes in an actual ship, which is so smart thank you lighting designer

also a very clear arc with the lighting, blue -> orange -> blue/red -> orange/multiple -> blue

sound

i actually kinda liked this remix? it fit theme and had a very clear dramatic arc. also i like wonderland, so sue me.

staging

WE DID IT, WE FINALLY GOT A CLEAR NARRATIVE FROM AT LEAST ONE GROUP! wonderland was actually a great choice for them because it’s a really good indicator of exactly how hungry they are. i was a bit worried that it would fall flat because it kinda rides on mingi but they actually pulled it off. i have literally no idea where they pulled all that energy from but holy shit you can practically lick the attitude off the screen. i’m also very impressed by the amount of information they managed to fit into that four minute narrative. we had a full conflict/climax/resolution, as well as a really clear understanding of the tenacity and drive of the group, as well as the desire to support one another in achieving their goals. bravo.

ok so like i said in the set section, they used that pirate ship bridge really effectively to create two different but connected spaces. this is a really smart way to make it seem like you have two spaces while having to only build one set. it was also one of the best ways to utilize this dumbass stage so it doesn’t just look like you’re running arbitrarily from area to area because you can.

also levels! levels are so important for staging but also hard to do in this context because you have to be able to move really quickly in and out of full group formation, but I think they did a really good job here.

continued point: the kraken arm worked because it was the conflict they needed to overcome in the narrative, so it had a function within the performance. also related: all the tricking and jumping also served a purpose within the narrative too. it was either used for fighting (yeosang kicking all those dancers on beat) or a demonstration of teamwork (jongho flinging yunho around on the floor). also frankly excellent use of choreographic formation with the backup dancers, each formation had a specific function and was meant to highlight ateez without being overbearing.

not a whole lot of camera choreo, but a fairly good long take at the beginning and the editing wasn’t too obnoxious which I think was more chance than intent, but i’m not gonna look a gift kraken in the beak.

sf9

i actually really liked this stage, and i really like that sf9 has established their colour as effortlessly elegant, which does set them apart from the rest of the groups. this stage was really choreographically complex and they made it seem so easy, so real props to them. however, like with ikon’s stage, there were a lot of good ideas that just weren’t followed through enough for me.

like ateez, song choice and theme were very well intertwined with this one, there was a lot of thought put into this stage. the pun with ‘jealous’ and ‘jilleosseo’ and having a fairytale/magic mirror narrative? fuckin GALAXY BRAINED. incredible. the implication that not only taeyang but the entire group is the evil queen from snow white? chef’s kiss. should have committed harder and put one of them in massive cloak à la king taemin mama 2020. instead it was subtle enough to not try to step on ateez’s schlocky camp toes but still just as serious and i love that. do i wish they pushed it farther though? also yes.

costume

not gonna lie, i had my reservations on the costumes when we saw the previews of them in the waiting room, but the thing about stage costumes is that they always look bad when not on stage. if they look good in the waiting room you’ve done something wrong. and i loved them on stage. big fan of that quilted vest/pseudo stomacher. please can we have a corset trend? y’all already adopted bondage harnesses, c’mon a little corset won’t hurt. also a good example of a modern spin on a recognizable genre.

i wish the backup dancers weren’t in all black but i am fighting single person battle against the entire entertainment industry on that one.

set

extremely simple with a few smart utilizations. had a feeling this might have been a budget thing, as it had a similar kind of vibe with ikon’s stage, but the use of the mirrors was smart and a fun device that served the purpose of the narrative.

working with mirrors on stage is really fucking hard, so kudos to them for giving it a go. for the most part it was pretty effective. especially with the combo of moving mirrors and moving lights AND moving camera, you’re kind of asking to either blind your audience or at least give them a headache. i once saw a production of the magic flute that had a rotating mirror setpiece and i swear i nearly went blind due to the constantly flashing reflections. you have to really be careful with directionality and reflection, especially with the added element of a camera. also you never use real glass mirrors on stage, it is unbelievably bad luck and theatre people are the most superstitious demographic on the fucking planet.

i kinda loved the draped gold dais. i have nothing else to say about it other than fun!

lighting

a lot of this was very weirdly lit and i’m not sure why. the quality on youtube is terrible and cameras already have trouble picking up detail in low light, and throwing a whole bunch of primary red over that (the colour with the longest wavelength and therefore disappears the easiest in the dark. also human eyes are not very good at distinguishing variations in the red spectrum) and the red costumes made it extremely difficult to tell what was happening.

i will give them props for dramatic lighting usage, especially for the two way mirror trick and for using the floor as a primary lighting source at the end, which i think groups should be using more of. how often do you have a lighting source in your floor!!! almost never!! use that opportunity!!

sound

i actually enjoyed this remix too. it was well suited to the dramatic nature of the stage. i think the sound byte at the beginning is ‘mirror mirror on the wall who’s the worthiest of them all’ but it also could be ‘who’s the worst of them all’ and that would be also fitting and kinda funny.

staging

again, not a lot of consideration for camera choreo in a meaningful way, and like the tbz stage I think the clarity in the actual choreo got hampered by the editing. because there was a lot of choreographic precision that went into making this work and it wasn’t totally obvious from the way mnet edited it.

a lot of them are actors so it works that they’re leaning more towards dramatic stages rather than the sort of performance type stages we’ve seen so far. i like this choice for them as it gives them a very obvious colour but they’re almost on the verge of making it look too easy, which does them some injustice.

next to ateez, using that long uninterrupted traverse was my favourite use of this stage. doubles as an easy way to build the atmosphere of a palace corridor/throne room with the rug, and to feed the drama of the piece.

skz

ok i have some…..things to say about this stage. so far i have not been kind to skz which makes me look like i hate them and i don’t, i promise. there were a lot of really interesting things happening in this stage and there some really successful ones, and i liked this a whole lot better than their intro stage, but their overall choreo and thematic dedication is really killing me. i’ll explain.

costume

I don’t hate them but also…….why? I got the good self vs evil self/internal struggle theme but the costumes don’t really have anything interesting to say about that. as far as modern style costuming goes i think they’re on the more interesting end, but they don’t push it far enough. there’s a few western art history visual motifs and honestly? they should have gone whole hog and whited out their faces/hair and made them look like classical sculptures. that would have been hella fun, especially with that little statue and marionette sequence, plus the shadow/leash manipulation.

this time it was actually intentional that the backup dancers were in blacks and i appreciate that.

why on EARTH did they have that ridiculous makeup that didn’t read on stage? theatre makeup and tv makeup are different, you can’t just do a light purple eyeshadow and expect to read under blue and red light. someone needs to bring an actual theatre makeup artist in and get these boys in some real crazy looks. see previous point about full-face white pancake. more extreme makeup please and thank you!

set

i liked the use of internal architecture within this massive weird stage space and they used the corridors quite well. i didn’t really like the mix of baroque scrolling and also graffiti, it wasn’t quite connected for me. this has been a common theme among this round and i think it comes from budget/props pulls rather than anything else.

also there was a distinct feeling of trying to fill the main stage space with bodies as opposed to atmosphere. this can work in some specific cases but the intent wasn’t strong enough for me. it just felt like a lot of people on stage, especially in the end choreo.

lighting

the general lighting was fine but not particularly inspired. the low light in the beginning was actually quite well done, especially combined with the fog, but in my opinion was not dramatic enough. you have a pseudo art history theme happening, pump that contrast and push the chiaroscuro!

ok stay with me, i’m gonna say something extremely controversial that might actually get me cancelled. s*per j*unior’s burn the floor did everything this stage was trying to do on a smaller scale and better. look i know ok, this is a like, a double atom bomb hot take. just forget everything you know about them and watch the performance video. tell me that’s not some of the most interesting choreo you’ve seen in kpop. if you’re going to work with practical light you need to COMMIT. not just steal the solar lanterns out of my mom’s back garden.

i have a lot of opinions on using practical light and alternate light sources in performance because it’s a huge part of my practice and this just....wasn’t interesting enough for me. push it further!

(I will wait for the subs on the full episode because there has to be a reason they chose that specific shape of lamp. if not i gotta ask jyp why he’s raiding my mom’s garden)

sound

god’s menu has such specific imagery associated within the lyrics and choreography that this stage was a bit dissonant for me. especially when seen in conjunction with two stages where the narrative was tied explicitly to the lyrics of the songs. i think maybe if it hadn’t been grouped with these other two stages i would have felt differently. the other groups chose to do songs were a little more abstract and allowed for more visual experimentation, but to go so blatantly against the food metaphor didn’t really work for me and i had a tough time divorcing the association. I found the arrangement to be a little lacking in energy for me towards the end but otherwise it was pretty interesting.

staging

Definitely a better performance overall that the intro stage. almost all of the gimmicks this time had relevance to the theme which i appreciated. the marionette bit and the shadow/mirror were probably the most interesting but i wish they were better lit.

there was a lot of back and forth in the blocking that made the stage feel repetitive and also aimless? like there wasn’t a very clearly established directionality within the internal space, so it felt like treading over the same ground for no purposeful reason. and again, not a lot of intentional camerawork.

i really liked having the dancers under the big sheet, it fit well enough within the ‘war between internal selves’ theme, but also had a loose tie to the art imagery. again, i really wish they had stuck to a clearer visual theme. it makes them stick out especially in this grouping of stages, but also across all the groups as whole because almost everyone had a clear(ish) visual idea.

holy shit that’s a lot of backup dancers. i don’t really feel like that many were necessary and the sheer number of them took away from the emphasis of the group. with all of the other stages (except for tbz) it was very clear who the centre of attention and emphasis was, and with both skz and tbz they got swallowed by the sheer scale they were trying to operate at. bigger is not always better.

---

this is a tough round to rank because none of these stages are bad, there’s just some that are, in my opinion, more successful than others. all of these stages do very well in specific elements but fall short in others which also makes this ranking difficult. i’m evaluating these based on whether they were successful to me, as i’m pretty sure this ranking will probably not all be popular opinion, but whatever i like to live on the edge.

btob – visuals, vocals, narrative, swords? what more do you want me to say? also i watched the full episode and minhyuk did rehearsal with a real bokken and i think i am in love with him now.

ateez – honestly not sure if i would have ranked this first if that high note hadn’t been a mess. i love camp nonsense and i genuinely think this was a well designed stage. i can’t believe i keep saying that but it’s true.

sf9 – this stage was really solid, just could have been pushed farther. i think it has a really good sense of drama and it’s a pity that sf9’s colour is more subdued, because i think they’re going to be stuck around the 3rd/4th position for the rest of the show.

ikon – ikon is only ranking this high because although i am disappointed in the wasted potential of this stage, they NAILED the camerawork and actually brought in someone to block the steadicam into the choreo. also they’re incredible performers. i say this every time, but their stage presence, although maybe lower energy that they normally would be, is still not to be fucked with.

skz – i think this one is the most ‘meh’ for me. while i liked a lot of the elements here they just didn’t push it far enough and the lack of narrative and general aimless choreo led to me not having any strong feelings yea or nay.

tbz – to be quite honest the lack of costume unity is a big hit for me. all elements of design are equally as important but because of my personal practice and experience i tend to put a lot of weight on good costume and spatial design. i don’t actually like game of thrones also, so I feel mildly offended on behalf of michele clapton, who had did a fucking incredible job and doesn’t deserve to be slandered like this. also the lack of cohesive choreography and the overblown lighting made this difficult to watch, no matter how good i thought the rear projection/stretch fabric dance was.

any questions or opinions you wanna share hit me up! see you next week!

#im ready for the angry asks about that s*ju opinion because that is a spicy one #kingdom #kingdom review #kpop analysis #im so surprised by these stages i cant believe ateez stuck the landing #i saw the preview for next week also and the new round looks wild so im ready #text

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kinetic-elaboration · 3 years

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June 25: 2x24 The Ultimate Computer

Belated notes on my watch of The Ultimate Computer yesterday.

Kirk’s definitely in Captain Mode today. You can tell when he’s on edge and suspicious and serious.

Yet another old Kirk friend. Does he know everyone in Starfleet?

War games lol. But it’s “not the military.”

Spock is super into this computer.

A-7 Computer Expert Certification.

The crew’s not needed? Wow, okay, this is going to end badly.

“This gadget.” How do you really feel, Kirk?

And there’s Spock literally making faces behind the Commodore’s back. He is soooo that type. He’s like “Jim, are you hearing this? Can you believe this guy?”

I’m insulted on Kirk’s behalf right now. Replacing people with machines so blithely is offensive.

Of course Bones doesn’t like it.

Oh yeah triumvirate walking scene. I love them. it takes so little for me to think ‘what badasses.’ S2 is really stepping up this dynamic in particular.

And Spock is comfortable enough around Bones to be sassy around him

Oh no, the computer is already glitching, and there is no backup and no plan B.... Bones is completely right in his assessment. This is essentially a Titanic situation: way too much hubris involved. Nothing can go wrong so nothing will go wrong so we’ve planned for nothing going wrong!

McCoy has BFF Clearance. He can go wherever he wants.

“It’s the M-5? What happened to Ms 1-4?” Channel #5.

Ahhhh little gratuitous touch to Spock’s arm. They’re In Love.

“There are certain things men must do to remain men.”

“The right computer finally came along.” Damn Bones.

Jim’s suspicions about the computer coming right after that line make it look like he’s jealous that Spock likes it so much.

He’s getting a “red alert right here.” Computers don’t have that kind of intuition.

Jim’s so thoughtful and self-aware. He really cares both about his instincts and about interrogating those instincts for bias and unreasonableness. This is giving me real S1 vibes: the quiet, intelligent, idealized hero Captain at the fore.

This whole scene is perfect, eminently quotable, and sounds exactly like something that could have been written about automation in 2021. You’re okay with it when it’s happening to someone else but then the computer comes for YOUR job....

Uh-h, M-5 is turning off all the lights...

Space merchant marines... good to know.

HOW are the Captain and CMO “non-essential personnel”? The first sign that M-5 is illogical. They should bring some doctor on the landing party mission given that uh humans are going on it and might get injured.

Anyway I can’t wait for Kirk to destroy this bitch and save the day.

Lol it turned off the lights on Bones in sickbay.

Damn, now it’s trying to take Uhura’s job too!

Chekov is so bored.

Spock wants to serve under one man and one man ONLY. Loyalty to one man... sounds like a wedding vow... and Kirk looks so soft...

So, if Spock has to describe to McCoy what that (unnecessary bitchy and catty) “Captain Dunsel” remark means, by saying that it’s a phrase that “midshipmen use at Starfleet Academy,” is this to imply Bones didn’t go to Starfleet Academy?

He’s never felt so at odds with the ship.... a lover’s quarrel...she’s cheating on him with another man...

Jim Kirk, certified Poetry Nerd. He’s such a romantic.

So glad Bones got him a drink so he can return to the bridge and a possible emergency with just a little bit of a buzz going.

Spock in the chair...

Huh, an automated ship with no crew. Interesting concept.

Oh no M-5! She’s got control of the ship and she won’t let go!

Kirk’s face when Enterprise attacks.. the betrayal... his beautiful lady used for mindless destruction.

“Only a robot” ship--! Bones is insulted.

Kirk orders the computer turned off but we’re only halfway through the ep so...

....And the computer is sentient now.

That was the shortest Captain’s Log ever. “The computer has taken over the ship the end.”

Scotty’s like, “...Well what if we just unplug it?”

Okay so now they only have 19 crew.

Spock and Bones are on point today. “Don’t say it’s fascinating.” / “I won’t. But it is... interesting.” This bitch knows exactly what he’s doing.

The computer isn’t a child, guys!

We need powerful computers “so men don’t have to die in space”--like uh that man your computer literally just killed?

I don’t get Daystrom’s logic at all. He talks as if people, like, needed to do work in space, to survive or something. We don’t need to. We want to! We want to go out and meet cool aliens! This guy is no fun.

What is the thing “greater” than fact finding in space that the robots are going to free us to do? Like what is more impressive than SPACE? I don’t even get that.

Time to mix up fake sci fi world-building references with real references! The Nobel and Zee-Magnee Prizes. Sitar of Vulcan.

A theory emerges... the computer acts illogically...Daystrom won’t let Spock near it... I know this isn’t where this is going, but it kind of sounds like they’re implying it’s a scam, lol. He sold an idea he didn’t have so it’s like.. not a real computer.

Spock’s little protege, Chekov.

“We have been pursuing a wild goose.” Aw, bb’s trying so hard to be colloquial. (Also he 100% learned that phrase from McCoy in The Gamesters of Triskellion and now he’s trying it out on Kirk...when McCoy isn’t around.)

“Not to offend you by using the h-word, but... could it be... human?”

Kirk’s really mad at Daystrom now.

The Commodore really set up that dramatic turn to camera there.

Poor Kirk. His ship is being used for evil.

“They can’t destroy the ship, what would happen to the computer?!” Yes, the computer. And the other 19 people and himself but mostly the computer. Daystrom really has lost it.

I love the actor who plays him, though.

“You are great. I am great.” Nothing weird happening here.

Spirk attack! (Spork it out.)

Spock’s way too sure Commodore Wesley is about to die. “He was decent, it’s a shame the ship I’m on is gonna kill him.”

And now another round of Kirk versus the computer and Kirk’s logic wins.

M-5 should argue that it did not commit murder, it committed homicide in self-defense. But then Daystrom didn’t program it with a lawyer’s brain.

It’s uh just gonna leave? Not turn the lights back on?

Kirk is so smart! I know I say this all the time, but it’s true! He knew what to do to save the ship because he knew Bob Wesley. He had formed connections, he had experience and knowledge that doesn’t come from logic. He is not replaceable!

McCoy’s like “Spock, fight me. Debate me Spock. Fight me. I’ll be fun.”

Spock HAS answered the computers versus humans question--he likes humans. He wants to be surrounded by humans.

That was really good! One of the better S2 episodes. Great Kirk, great triumvirate--as a trio and all three sides of the triangle--great sci fi concept, great guest star, great social commentary--still 100% relevant today.

i definitely have to think more about the ‘human computer’ concept. I liked that they specifically went out of their way to explain why the computer was human, how that was part of its design, and then tied that into its creator, his background, his belief system, and his insecurities. I feel like most ‘sentient computer’ or ‘advanced AI’ narratives just assume a computer that’s powerful enough will eventually be alive, which is not something I believe. The scariness of advanced AI to me is the incredible power it has to act quickly, but in a complete black-box way: you can’t literally see the logic string of its thought processes, and nor can you figure them out easily or completely using the creators’ intentions or logic because the machine has ‘learned’ since its inception, and its learning processes are not human. There is a real alienness to them that I find scary. And I do think this ep captured that nuance in M-5: it has the speed and abilities of a super computer, the “human” qualities of its creator for well-explained reasons, and the unpredictability of a mechanism that is NEITHER human nor human-controlled tool. And of course the ep’s ultimate thesis--that humans cannot be completely automated or replaced, and that we should not want to automate or replace humans--is comforting and of a morality I can and want to agree with.

This was also one of those eps that made me curious about the differences in AOS and TOS Kirk--in other words, an ep that relied on his history with Starfleet and his experience, on the reality that he’s a 34 year old man with 15+years of experience in the Fleet. Time, experience, connections, these aren’t things you can replace no matter how smart you are, and I feel like it would have been interesting to see AOS!Kirk deal with some situation that is trickier for him because he’s a Captain with a startlingly small amount of institutional experience. It’s not just about being young or generally inexperienced, in other words--it’s about NOT knowing every Captain, Admiral, and Commodore in the service, it’s about NOT having friends across the galaxy because he just hasn’t had time to make them. Even in deep space, that matters. And I think it’s something that I appreciate more as an adult myself, with actual real world experience of the importance of connections and experience and time, especially in sort of insular or smaller work communities.

Anyway, next is Bread and Circuses! Another great ep for the triumvirate. I can’t believe we’re almost through S2!!

#the year 2021 #2021: star trek #star trek tos #2021: fandom thoughts

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si-nging-ren · 3 years

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*CRACKS KNUCKLES*

okay. ive decided im going to discontinue the jirou x reader fanfic "wrong number, my bad" for a number of reasons that i will get into in a bit. i have also, however, decided to create an smau for hawks (probably not, but who ive decided on for now) x reader, based on something more personal about me. the goal of the story being more personal is to give me a better layout for how it should continue on and the feelings can be more genuine than me making up stories on a whim and hoping they work. i will give out the plan for wnmb, however, so that anybody interested can still understand how the story wouldve ended.

now as for why im abandoning wnmb.

1. i dont feel the energy to write it anymore. i dont like where the story is going, and with my current mental state and status at school, i dont have the ability to start over or try again. i font have the ideas for the story and just dont vibe with it.

2. mental reasons. i can't stick to the schedule i made for the story as well as i used to be able to, and also personal mental health reasons that sort of keep me from doing so.

3. there are personal life reasons that cause this, but jirou has slowly evolved into somewhat of a discomfort character. i dont want to get into the reasons as to why, but i dont like her that much and bad memories come up whenever i try to sit with her in my head for too long.

thats really all for why i dont want to continue wnmb, but for anybody interested, here was the plan as to how the story was planned out (via notes):

- [x] yn and mina and ochaco do be talking doe

- [x] basically introductions

- [x] same with jirou baku toko yaomomo and denks

- [x] but THEN

- [x] yn and jirou talk :DDD

- [x] jirou basically says that theyre not annoying

- [x] yn says their typical clown shit

- [x] "aidjskjdh thanks you daddy 🥺"

- [x] jirou doesnt answer for a wholeass hour

- [x] "sorry had to go to church and clense from that sin"

- [x] "o-oh okay 😔 daddy doesnt love me"

- [x] "there are so many things wrong with that"

- [x] "😳😳😳"

- [x] "im starting to wish that i blocked you"

- [x] "nONONONONO IM SORRY"

- [x] "nyways what did you wanna talk about d-"

- [x] "......."

- [x] "arling :)))"

- [x] poor jirou just wanted to know about who they are

- [x] "name, hobby, talent, interests, whatever i just wanna know about you"

- [x] yn hops over to twitter all "omg theyre so sweet 🥺🥺🥺"

- [x] naturally ochaco and mina are all "fake bestie wtf are u talking about"

- [x] yn is laughing awkwardly and is just,,, "oh nothing 😳😳"

- [x] (nobody believes them)

- [x] then they ask about jirou but she has to give false info

- [x] except for her gender its fine if she says that

- [x] she hops over to the squad

- [x] panicking

- [x] "guys wtf i think i just committed a crime"

- [x] "nono youre fine what happened"

- [x] "i made a fake identity so the person who contacted me wouldnt know it was me"

- [x] "do they even know you???"

- [x] "YES they said they really liked our music and im PANICKING"

- [x] "okok calm down its not illegal or anything"

- [x] "i think"

- [x] "YOU T H I N K ? "

- [x] "yeah sorry :// but like you did this to yourself lmaooo"

- [x] jirou awkwardly hops back to yn

- [x] "yeah i think that band is pretty cool too im actually friends with some of them"

- [x] i mean its not false

- [x] ":ooo omg rlly?????? theyre so cool aaa 🥺🥺 maybe we can meet one day at one of their concerts 👉👈 jkjk...... unless 😳"

- [x] little did they know

- [x] LMAOO jk

- [x] kinda

- [ ] they end up talking for hoursss and mina and ochaco ask one day if they wanna hang out

- [ ] theyre all "hell yesss 🥴 where we goin??"

- [ ] a bar. they go to a fucking bar. (btw its to celebrate minas new job thingyyy)

- [ ] drink responsible kiddosss

- [ ] nyways afterwards she ends up talking to jirou bout how shes super nice and would love to be friends with her more

- [ ] jirou has gay panic tm

- [ ] like actually theyre rlly cute fuck

- [ ] yn asks if they can call since theyve never heard her voice or seen her

- [ ] jirous all ".....theyre drunk they wont recognize my voice"

- [ ] also shes rlly groggy since its TWO IN THE DAMN MORNING

- [ ] jirou calls her and yn asks if she wants to meet someday bby doesnt understand okay

- [ ] jirou panics and asks if they can get to know each other more first

- [ ] yn is hurt but understands and agrees

- [ ] yn asks to play 20 questions

- [ ] jirou asks if theyre a preteen jokingly

- [ ] yn whines and says its either that or a drinking game

- [ ] not wanting yn to drink anymore, she sighs and agrees

- [ ] she ends up finding out:

1. yn has a cat

3. thats it, yn passed out

- [ ] jirou fell asleep on call later nd they didnt hang up until jirou woke up later and realized that awake yn would recognize her

- [ ] she quickly hung up and then sent them a good morning text

- [ ] bitches be playin

- [ ] but yn doesnt mind theyre a gay, dumb clown

- [ ] yn asks what minas job was since they never found out- god their dumb

- [ ] mina says its the typical teaching thing but its for ome of yns favorite bands

- [ ] "ooh, who are they?"

- [ ] "they said their name was blackbear! pretty sure youve talked about them some times before"

- [ ] "omygod mina you dont understnad if you could somehow find a way for me to find them i would literally marry u"

- [ ] "please dont. but ill try boo dw"

- [ ] she ends up doing it

- [ ] but inbetween then they end up getting rlly close like numerous calls and texts and learning more about each other until they realize they like her

- [ ] yn is super happy all "bro u guys are so awesome"

- [ ] bby girl is vibrating.

- [ ] LMAOO YOU WANNA KNOW JOWNTHEY FIND OUT

- [ ] THEY AND JIROU END UP BECOMING RLLY CLOSE LIKE THEY FRIENDSSSS

- [ ] AND SHE ASKS FOR THEIR NUMBER

- [ ] THEIR STILL JITTERY BTW SO THEYRE LIKE WOAH RLLY???? ID LOVE TO BRO

- [ ] AND JIROU PUTS HER NUMBER IN YNS PHONE AND SEES THE NAME "nd strikes" COME UP ND SHES LIKE "HUH MUST BE A GLITCH"

- [ ] BUT YNS ALL

- [ ] "HAHA SOMEONE NAMED "BBY" CAME UP WHEN I TYPED IN MY NUMBER I WONDER WHO THAT IS"

- [ ] "MAYBE I TYPED IT WRONG" CAUSE BBY IS DUMB

- [ ] MEANWHILE JIROU IS PANICKED CAUSE "HOLY FUCKING SHIT THEYRE BBY"

- [ ] SO SHE HANDS THEM THIER PHONE BACK AWKWARDLY AND YN SEES THEIR OLD MESSAGES AND PANICKS

- [ ] "HOLD UP IS STARS JIROU????? HAHHA NO IM BLIND AN D DUMB SURELY NOT"

- [ ] SO THEYRE LIKE "DID U EVER TELL ANYONE UR NAME IS STARS"

- [ ] AND JIROU JUST SIGHS AND IS CLEARLY IN PAIN AND IS JUST "YEAH THATS ME"

- [ ] ALL YN DOES IS LAUGH AND GO "YO THATS KINDA GAY"

- [ ] JIROU IS PAINED

- [ ] LIKE SHE THINKS THEIR GONNA HATE HER BUT????? NO??????????? SHES CONFUSED LMAOO

- [ ] yn blinks and realizes she should probably confess or smth

- [ ] "uhm, jirou?"

- [ ] "yeah whats up?"

- [ ] "aCTUALLY NVM ILL TELL YOU LATER-"

- [ ] later in a call they say it

- [ ] jirou is rlly smart and all but her first thought was "its cause of who i am. this happened immediately after."

- [ ] some part of her is screaming that its feelings and that she likes them back but she ignores it.

- [ ] like this has to be bad right???

- [ ] nyways jirou ghosts her like a clown and rants to the band b-wordssss gc

- [ ] yn cries to the babiest of the babies 🥺🥺🥺 gc

- [ ] yn asks if she just doesnt care about them now that shes seen them

- [ ] jirou realizes "wait fuck maybe im wrong"

- [ ] spoiler alert: she is

- [ ] she sort of goes "i didnt rlly think that you actually liked me actually

- [ ] yn starts crying

- [ ] (this is over call btw)

- [ ] "why tf wouldnt i?!"

- [ ] "bc you confessed right after you knew who i was"

- [ ] "istfg so our conversations just dont matter ig"

- [ ] jirou is confused

- [ ] like??? she gets that theyre mad but she does understand why so much

- [ ] "listen i just need to know if you like me back or not please. before i start crying again."

- [ ] she decided to not comment on how they were already crying

- [ ] "yes i like you okay"

- [ ] "do you actually?"

- [ ] "yes. istag that i actually like you and im not shitting u. if you want ill go there rn"

- [ ] ".....yes pls"

- [ ] "i need your address though"

- [ ] "oh yeah– its *address*"

- [ ] jirou arrives all nervous and shit

i didn't have anything planned out after that, but it was probably gonna be a kiss scene or something idk

#jirou x reader #wnmb #wrong number my bad #jirou kyouka #kyouka x reader #writers

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ahumansvoid · 4 years

Text

The unofficial Follow up

Tumblr is a fucking nightmare. It deleted this entire thing when I edited the fucking tags.

Anywho. This is a follow up to Commander Fox Deal With A lot which itself is a follow up to my Interviews fic.

I call it unofficial because a) I’m not sure if this is really how it’ll go within the Interviews Universe and b) If this happens in the Interviews Universe, it’d be after the Anakin follow up (That I am still writing, Anakin doesn’t like me okay? He’s a dama bitch whenever I try) Hence I’m not putting it up on AO3 right now.

But I still want to share it because idk how long the Anakin follow up is gonna take and I like what I wrote. And am rewriting this verbatim because someone reblogged this so thank you because I didn’t want to figure out what the fuck I wrote up here.

Also, if you don’t want to read those two fics but want to try this one out, all you really need to know is that the Coruscant Guard has become a Daycare. Other than that, this is a pretty independent work.

Now Idk what I wrote down here so bear with me if you’re rereading this after April 4th because this has some slight changes I’m sure. Also. I edited the thing here so, let’s hope I remember my edits.

Characters: Commander Fox, Clone OCs

Words: 870 (or somewhere around there)

Warnings: Mentioned Character Death.

Mando’a translations:

Vod -> Brother

Di’kut -> idiot (lit. someone who forgets to put on their pants)

Utreekov -> idiot, fool, emptyheaded

Gar mirsh solus* -> your brain cell is lonely

Jorbe** -> Reason

Ade -> child

*The one on Mandoa.org is actually Kaysh mirsh solus (His brain cell is lonely) but Gar means your and I figured it’d work. Let me know if it doesn’t.

**Yes I named a clone ‘Reason’ in Mandoa. Take a guess at what’s notable about him.

Now the story

“Explain. Now.” Fox really wanted to know what Ink and Hive were thinking.

Both troopers shuffle a bit, glancing at each other, before Hive starts talking, “So, the safety lady came by to check if our base was safe for kids because the Chancellor wanted to be certain. We knew it would be so we didn’t care, but it wasn’t. The lady gave us a day to clean up before she came back to ascertain it was safe. It is now. But there were dangerous things in reach of the kids that no vod would leave out. So, Ink and I went through the security footage to see what di’kut was leaving dangerous shit around.”

Ink takes over the story, “It was one of the Chancellors aids. She had come down and put dangerous stuff in easily accessible areas for children. It was deliberate. So,” Ink shrugs, “we bugged the Chancellors office and set up hidden cameras. We needed to know if he was telling her to or if she just really hated kids.”

Hive cuts in, “While we recorded everything, we set it up so it only triggered our comms when she went into his office. And when she did, we got this recording,” Hive holds out a holorecorder and turns it on. An image of the Chancellor and one of his aids came to life, paused for a second before Hive played it.

”And?” The Chancellor prompts.

“I set up everything you told me to. Their daycare will be shut down before the days out.” The aid states.

“Good. Leave.” With that, the aid leaves the office.

And the recording stops.

This still does not explain the actions those two had taken. Fox looked at both for more of an explanation.

Hive speaks up first, “We went through the recordings later and found him in an upset over the daycare not being shut down. I don’t have it on me but he was talking about maybe sending a bounty hunter to attack the base. Make it unfit for kids. We couldn’t let that stand, vod.”

Fox sighs heavily, “Let me make this clear. You two assassinated the Supreme Chancellor of the Galactic Republic because he threatened our base and daycare?” Fox really wanted to make sure he was hearing this correctly.

“He debated to himself on whether to attack the base when the kids were here!” Ink protests.

Which, while a good point, changes little.

Fox groans, “You two are true utreekov. Seriously, gar mirsh solus.”

Both troopers were silent, but were clearly upset with the insults. But not fighting them.

First smart action from both of them.

Would it of killed them to go through more of their recordings from the Chancellors office?

Fox and Jorbe had gone through it and found some rather damning footage.

Fox pulls out his own holorecorder and played a clip that Ink and Hive’s bugs and cameras had picked up.

Chancellors Palpatine stands up from his desk and goes over to a holocaller, pulling on a robe and pulling the hood up to hide his face. After pressing the call button, Count Yan Dooku appears.

“Lord Sidious how might I be of service?” Count Dooku asks.

The Chancellor answers, “There will be a Jedi battalion lead by Master Gallia at Bo’lim. Win the system, she will not be able to call in reinforcements.”

Count Dooku bows, “Of course, Master.” with that, the holocall cuts out.

Fox shuts off the holorecorder and levels the pair of troopers with a Look.

“Did General Gallia-”

“I requisitioned reinforcements and changed certain travel plans for other battalions so she’d have backup.” Fox states, it had been one of the first things he’d done upon hearing that, “Now, please explain why you assassinated our Chancellor who was a Sith Lord and working with the enemy?” Fox’s voice was hard. He wanted these two to get with the program. They weren’t. He was not happy.

He rarely was. But that was beside the point.

“We assassinated him because he threatened our ade.” Ink states.

Fox sighs again. Seriously?

“You two are fucking morons.”

“Are we in trouble?” Hive asks.

“Yes you two are in deep trouble for assassinating our Supreme Chancellor who was committing treason against the Galactic Republic.” Fox was pretty sure his sarcasm wasn’t coming through his anger, but he really didn’t care. “The fuck do you think?”

Hive’s answer was hesitant, “No?”

Fox sighs heavily, “You’re both on latrine duty. Get out of my office.”

It wasn’t really a punishment. Not the one they should have gotten for assasinating the Supreme Chancellor.

But Palpatine had been a traitor to the republic. Jorbe was leaking the illegal footage, making sure it had no connection to the Guard.

Soon everyone would know the Chancellor was a traitor.

And a Sith Lord.

Fox probably should of punished Ink and Hive harder.

If anyone found out it had been them and all they got was latrine duty?

Fox would be decommissioned with them.

But he couldn’t bring himself to punish them more.

The Chancellor was a Traitor to the Republic Fox was sworn to protect.

Also.

Fox really hated the man.

#Commander Fox #CC 1010 #Clone Ocs #Star Wars Fanfiction #My writing #Star wars fanfic #Star Wars #Star Wars the Clone Wars #boderline crack #Interviews AU

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consummate-deviant · 5 years

Text

I reckon I’m gonna talk about Hordak for a minute

So, I feel the need to talk about Hordak. This is, perhaps, not unusual. Once upon a time ago, writing stupidly long pseudo-essays about characters I rather liked used to be my thing… and it’s still a bug that bites me from time to time. The timing certainly seems right! Homeboy has been the topic of conversation lately, thanks to the recent release of She-ra season 4, and the manifold feels associated with it. I’m fond of Hordak, as it were, so I don’t mind sharing my perspective on the subject, since there’s some confusion as to his appeal.

The two stances I see taken on Hordak most often, by those who don’t like him, I should specify, are as follows:

A.) He’s an irredeemable villain who has done terrible things, and I don’t see why anyone would like him.

And

B.) He’s a lame, nonthreatening villain.

I’m not going to be engaging with mindset ‘B’ quite as much as with mindset ‘A’ in the following post, in part because the reasons why he’s so lame and nonthreatening are kinda tied to what I’ll be discussing by implication, but mostly because my response to mindset B can be summed up with the following: “You are not wrong, at all. However, that’s literally the entire point of his character, so while you aren’t wrong to be disappointed if you were hoping he would be a more measured, megalomaniacal sort, it’s also not a failure on the part of the writers, since his lack of suitability for the role he was trying to play was always going to be what his story was about.”

Mindset ‘A’, though... well... that’s a bit tricky. Ultimately “irredeemable” is a personal value judgment. The threshold a character must cross before one audience member feels they no longer deserve forgiveness can vary quite wildly from another, and while trying to pass one’s personal opinion off as an objective fact is something of a pastime on the internet, I am- and I cannot state this emphatically enough- NOT your dad… probably. At least, I hope to god… Look, odds are really good that I’m not your dad, so… you do your thing and shine like the crazy diamond you are. I probably can’t change your mind, and considering I don’t even know you, it’d be kinda creepy if I thought I could! What I can do, though, for those genuinely curious how anyone could consider him redeemable, is share my own perspective on the character, and why I think redemption is the direction the story is going, based on how I’ve read the text thus far… So I’m gonna do that. Let’s go over Hordak as he has appeared in the She-Ra reboot.

Part I: Season 1 Hordak

Now see, when we kick things off, I totally get where both the ‘A’ group and the ‘B’ group are coming from. Hordak, as he appears in season 1, seems ruthless, intimidating, and single-minded. Hordak doesn’t carry the conflict in season 1, serving as more of a background presence while Catra and Shadow Weaver, who have a more personal investment in the central narrative, do all the heavy lifting of antagonizing the heroes and angsting.

This keeps the attention off of Hordak, which is precisely how he likes things. When people aren’t going out of their way to interact with him, then it’s easy for him to control what few interactions he does have. That’s what season 1 shows us: Hordak, when he has perfect control over his own narrative. Every scene that features him is shot with a low angle, often with his form either concealed in shadows or with his face partially out of frame. When he speaks, he’s always calm and distant… but calm in that ‘he could totally fly into a rage at any instant’ way that keeps people on their toes. Pragmatic, taciturn, perfectly measured and groomed,… pretty tall! By any metric a reasonable person can measure a competent, intimidating villain, Hordak circa season 1 seems like he’d pass the test.

Part 2: Season 2-3 Hordak

Here’s the thing... though... about season 1 Hordak... that we learn pretty quickly when we transition into season 2: Season 1 Hordak is a massive fraud. Like, seriously, he’s a fabrication created out of necessity to hide a single, prevailing truth: Hordak is an awkward dork who is kinda terrible at being an evil overlord.

I’ve seen some people describe Hordak’s season 2-3 character development with the expression “You thought I was Ozai, but I was actually Zuko this whole time!” Now, I like this expression fine. I’ve borrowed it a time or two in the past, but with regard to Hordak, I prefer to phrase it like this: “You thought I was Emperor Palpatine, but I was really the Wizard of Oz this whole time!” The former expression gives someone an idea of the tropes of the character pretty well, but the latter does a better job, I feel, of showing the relationship between season 1 and later seasons with Hordak. Hordak is a competent, unflappable, all-seeing leader… hey, hey! Pay no mind to the man behind the curtain! Hordak’s past… as a mindless clone created to lead other mindless clones in a mindless clone army… has left him laughably unprepared for the task of leading others. He’s smart, like, in a general bookish sense, but he has no charisma, no interpersonal talents to speak of, and doesn’t really seem to have any grasp of how to motivate his underlings, save to reward talent with promotion.

Out of necessity, Hordak keeps his true self buried underneath multiple layers of protection. The first layer is the season 1 illusion: Delegate direct command of his soldiers to a single adjutant, interact with that adjutant just enough to keep them in line, and remain in his sanctum all day, like the geeky shut-in he is.

The first layer is pretty nice, and seems to have bought him quite a few years running the horde… but what happens if, say, some uppity Force Captain decides to pester him with personal status reports… or some absent-minded inventor decides to raid his lab for a six-sided hex driver? Personally interacting with his minions for too long will reveal the illusion he’s been hiding behind! Well, fear not... This is where the second layer of protection comes in handy.

Yes, Hordak’s second layer of defense: blustering, shouting, and intimidating. Threaten them with dire consequences for bothering him, let them visit the planet with nearly-enough-atmosphere for a few seconds… do everything in his power to frighten them so badly they never want to directly interact with him again. What should happen if this second layer fails him, though? They learn of the most terrifying secret in Hordak’s entire arsenal.

...There is no third layer…

Nope. If a minion is plucky enough to peak behind the curtain of his grand illusion, and then bold enough to stand their ground at the explosion of hot air that follows… he has basically no follow-up left. One of my favorite nonverbal scenes in the entire series is the moment where he realizes that his screaming is having no visible impact on Entrapta. There’s a look on his face that seems to say ‘What the hell am I supposed to do now!?’… like, it’s clear the dude has never needed a third step to scare someone away before.

Ah, but you, my savvy reader, have no doubt cottoned on to the error in my argument thus far. Establishing that Hordak is an awkward, introverted nerd doesn’t really change the fact that he built the Etherian horde. The fact that he’s not especially competent doesn’t change the bad deeds his committed! Well, rest assured, you beautiful person who can claim no paternal relation to me, I agree! However, characterizing Hordak like this goes hand in hand with the other big reveal of season 3: his backstory.

Now, cards on the table, I’ve been taking Hordak as he comes, and up until this point I didn’t really have any strong idea of whether they were going the big-bad or redeemed-bad route with him. It wasn’t until season 3, when his origin was revealed, that I genuinely began to suspect that the redemption path was where the writers were headed, because it re-frames his actions in a subtle, but pretty important way.

With no Horde Prime, when one looks at Hordak, they see a man who orchestrated a corrupt and oppressive system for his personal benefit, who holds others in disdain due to self-aggrandizement, and is motivated by a desire to be seen as greater than everyone else. That is a character who would be very hard to convincingly redeem. While I’m loathe to raise the specter of Steven Universe discourse here, it’s a lot like the notion of redeeming the Diamonds… and, while I have no strong feelings about that show one way or the other, suffice it to say I can at least see why their redemption is controversial.

Horde Prime shifts the context of Hordak’s actions, though. Now, Hordak is a man who perpetuates the very system he is, himself, a victim of, because it’s the only system he knows. His conflict with others is born from the projection of his own self loathing. Said self-loathing comes from his chief motivation, which is to be acknowledged as worthy by an authority figure who has no interest or desire in ever offering him that acknowledgment.

Such a character is still flawed and villainous, because of course it is. If a character has done nothing wrong, they don’t need redemption in the first place. It’s a lot easier to accept the struggles of a flawed character if they’re a victim of oppression rather than its source. To borrow the SU comparison one final time, the Horde Prime twist reveals to us that Hordak isn’t a diamond, he’s just another one of the countless gems caught in their system.

By the by, does “perpetuates a system they, themselves, are victims of, suffers from conflicts born of projected self loathing, and desire to be acknowledged by an authority figure who has no interest or desire in providing said acknowledgment” sound familiar? I hope so! It ties into my final point of the day.

Part 3: Season 4 Hordak (aka “Hordak and Catra have basically the same arc”)

Now, implying similarity in the character arcs of Hordak and Catra has, historically, been a fraught endeavor. Even I, Hordak stan extraordinaire, felt that we needed to see a bit more of where the writers were wanting to take Hordak before we went and made comparisons. Then season 4 happened… and guys… the subtitle of season 4 may as well have been “Hordak and Catra have basically the same arc.”

Well, that’s a bit of an oversimplification. Catra had people she could perceive as her peers, which granted her a social circle outside of her direct superiors whom she could feel camaraderie with, which added a dimension to the emotional turmoil she felt, but in broad strokes it seems to be a comparison that the writers are inviting us to make. Their alliance in season 4 is based around their commonality. They motivate one another by feeding into the insatiable hunger both of them feel for external validation… in that regard, they bring out the worst in each other, and thus season 4 ends with both of them brought to their lowest point.

At the end of season 4, if the princesses had never arrived, and Double Trouble hadn’t been there to finally force her to confront the emotions she insistently projected onto others, Catra would have assumed the mantle she claimed from Hordak. She would have ruled the horde, devoid of satisfaction or happiness, and any children she took into her numbers she would have treated in exactly the same way Shadow Weaver treated her, and the same way Horde Prime treated Hordak.

To escape that fate, she needed her chance to face the system that oppressed her, and then the chance to face herself… and only once she had done both, could she start to move forward again. That’s why we see the start of her recovery in the final scenes of the season. Catra did unspeakably terrible things- by the end of season 4 her atrocity count easily rivals Hordak’s- and not everything can be blamed exclusively on others, but we, as an audience, have seen enough of what made her the way she is… that’s why most of us are onboard with her eventual redemption.

Catra is, beneath all the layers of spite and illusions of who she thinks she should be, a sweet kid who ultimately wants to reconnect with a friend she fears abandoned her, and to be respected and appreciated by the authority figures in her life. Hordak is, ultimately, a hikikomori dweeb who, not too long ago, was content to spend the rest of eternity with his gamer girlfriend in his lab, pretending to put together a portal machine.

The villain of She-ra is Horde Prime, and the system he put into place to feed his arrogance at the expense of those trapped within it. For those inside that system, like Catra or Hordak, they don’t cross the line and become truly irredeemable until they are given a clear and unambiguous chance to escape from that system and change their life for the better… but refuse to grasp it. Even then… sometimes it takes them a little while to see the hand being offered to them… and sometimes that hand is in the form of a fist.

In conclusion

Look, guys, I’ll be real with you… I made a play at pretending that I wrote this for some point or another… but I kinda didn’t. When I get into a fandom headspace, words get stuck in my head, y’know? When they do, they buzz around like bees until I write ‘em someplace… so here we are.

I’m not so arrogant as to assume I can change anyone’s mind with my 4 AM word vomit about the emaciated bat villain in my favorite children’s cartoon. This is just a thing I wrote! Maybe if you agree with it it makes you happy, and if you disagree with it then it doesn’t get’cha too worked up! I was gonna include Hordak’s relationship with Entrapta into the proceedings… but honestly, that would have doubled the length of this thing, and would have been kinda tangential to the point. I may do a more shippy essay thing later on… but if there’s one thing I learned from the last time I wrote a bunch of these… it’s that planning them out never works well. I guess if people wanna see it I can write it though.

Anyway, I’m rambling, so I’m gonna letcha go! Thanks for listening to my TED talk. Remember, villains are an artform, people are complicated, and hot cocoa is the best winter beverage. I’m going back to fanfic writing until the next bout of insomnia!

#she ra hordak #entrapdak #hordak #she ra 2019

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chickensarentcheap · 4 years

Text

Best Part of Me -Chapter 59

Warnings: Profanity

Tagging: @c-a-v-a-l-r-y, @alievans007, @innerpaperexpertcloud, @ocfairygodmother

A hot shower and a three hour nap -aided by a mixture of antidepressants, anxiety meds, and pain killers washed down by three shots of tequila- has done Tyler a world of good. Waking up feeling energized; still riding the high of the morning’s adrenaline rush and relatively pain free. Nothing more than a dull throb in the deepest part of the shoulder; some discomfort and audible cracking and popping when he stretches and manipulates it. But it’s bearable, unlike the agony that’s been a near constant fixture in his life for the past couple of years. While the initial replacement surgery and rehab had both been complete successes, a full recovery had eluded him. It had been his own fault, of course; the surgeon’s orders had been to alter his lifestyle and to avoid the very ‘activity’ that had caused so much damage in the first place. That ‘advice’ had lasted all of four months, until Nik had called, desperately needing his help and he’d been unable to resist both the lure of the game and the promise of damn good money.

He’d attempted to walk away several times in as many years, fully intending to commit himself to being a family man with his own little side business. Content with the motions of being the one to stay home with the kids while his wife either went back to school or found a new career she’d be happy with. But sometimes the best laid plans don’t work out. Not long after an early term miscarriage when the twins were two and a half, she’d gotten pregnant with Declan DESPITE being on birth control and coming to a mutual decision to wait until both Millie and the twins were in school full time before once again trying to add to their family. It had been completely unexpected, and off of their previous plans regarding their home life quickly went by the wayside. The job was easy money; he was confident in his skills and his abilities and Nik had promised to offer only the easiest of gigs.

That changed quickly. What should have been an ‘in and out’ assassination of a key political figure in El Salvador turning into a four day shit show that had him falling into dangerous enemy territory and almost needing to be extracted himself. After that, he’d said ‘fuck it’ and began taking whatever Nik brought to the table. And his physical health began to pay the price.

He orders a meal from room service and cracks open the bottle of whisky in the mini bar. He’s stuck to his word; staying sober while actually ON the job and not ever indulging during his downtime. Unlike the old days, he’s able to both pace himself AND stop after just a couple. A far cry from the guy who’d polish off an entire bottle and would be either too hung over to get up with his kids in the morning, or already passed out in the early evening; missing school events and extra curricular activities that he’d promised he’d attend. He refuses to be that guy again; the one who’d almost single handedly ruined his marriage because he put the bottle and the pain meds at the top of his priority list; allowing his addictions to take precedence over his family. The one who’d rightfully had his ass kicked out and then spent the next six months in a drunken stupor.

Never again. Never again will he be ‘that guy’. The absolute failure as a husband and a father. He can control it now; no longer needing to silence the inner demons or lessen the emotional suffering by getting. The want not nearly as powerful. Before it had been a way of life; no day complete without at least the smallest buzz. Now it’s a matter of convenience. Even enjoyment. A feeling of satisfaction and relief when the whisky finally hits the tongue and he experiences the initial burn in the back of his throat. After that, one drink doesn’t make him crave more. Instead satisfying his palate with bottle water and Gatorade and terrible coffee made in the hotel provided maker.

He’s lounging in the middle of the bed in a pair of boxer briefs when Koen finally returns. Back resting against the headboard and his legs stretched out; laptop resting on his thighs and a plate of food in his hands. And he only gives a brief glance towards the door when Koen stomps in and allows it to slam shut behind him. Offering no greeting, calmly and casually eating from the enormous serving of goat curry and naan bread, eyes never leaving the video playing on the computer; his three oldest on the plane, reading HIM a story and every so often having mispronounced words gently and lovingly corrected by their mother. And the grin that plays on his lips is double fold; pride and love for those beautiful and intelligent little human beings he’d had a hand in creating, and amusement at Koen’s mutters and complaints and strings of profanity.

“Look at you,” his friend grumbles. “All fucking relaxed and shit. Cocky, shit eating grin on your face.”

Tyler’s attention never leaves the laptop. A different video this time; Addie giving a real, genuine smile when she has her chin tickled. That one brings the prick of tears to his eyes. She’s still so tiny and so fragile, but she is...in fact...growing up.

“Why do you swear all the time?” He finally asks. “Makes you sound stupid. Find another fucking adjective.”

Koen smirks. “Well aren’t you just the clever one. Leave it to your brain damaged ass to remember THAT.”

“It’s my short term memory that’s fucked. Although I do remember threatening to throw your ass off the balcony. Keep calling me stupid or brain damaged, and it’ll happen.”

“Don’t be so goddamn sensitive. What’cha watching?”

“Just some videos Esme sent me. Of the kids. I’ve got two five year olds and a six year old that can read better than I can. How’d the fuck that ever happen?”

“Well their momma’s pretty damn smart. Maybe just be thankful their brains at least took after her.”

Tyler frowns, then flips Koen the middle finger. “I meant that they’re practically babies still and they can read like they’re a lot older. They’re so smart. So fucking smart.”

“Definitely gonna be trouble makers when they’re older. Imagine them as teenagers? Especially Millie? With that mouth of hers?”

“That mouth of hers is going to keep trouble AWAY from her. She says what she wants; fuck anyone’s feelings. Someone gets mouthy with her when she’s older, she’ll put them in their place. And if her own mouth doesn’t do it, her right hook will. She's a savage that kid.”

“Best of both mom and dad if you ask me. And look at you just kicking back. Acting like you didn’t just butcher two people this morning.”

Tyler shrugs. “Am I supposed to feel sorry for them?”

“Just thought maybe you’d be a little more...I don’t know...grumpy.”

“Why would I? They got what was coming to them. And they deserved a lot worse. You think that was brutal? Wait until I have more time and more space.”

“You’re starting to scare me a bit, mate. You’re enjoying this a little too much, I reckon.”

“Well if it was your family being threatened, you’d enjoy it too. You know what kind of things they would have done to my wife and kids? What I did is tame compared to what they had planned. I’ve heard the threats; you haven’t. It’s nightmare inducing shit. Let’s leave it at that.”

“That why you been freaking out in your sleep? Waking up barely able to breathe and shit? Scared the crap out of me the first couple of times.”

“It’s fucking with my head a bit,” Tyler admits. “Kind of hard not to let it mess with you. Trust me when I say that what I read? What was said about Esme? About the kids? I don’t wish any of it on my worst enemy.” It makes bile rise in his throat just thinking about it and he places the laptop on the bed and reaches for the bottle of Gatorade sitting on the nightstand. Downing half in order to rid himself of the bitterness and the burn. “Heard you guys had a bit of trouble.”

Koen scowls, pausing in the middle of taking off his gear. “Don’t get all cocky again, young man.”

“Not getting cocky. Just repeating what I heard. Didn’t you guys leave the same time I did?”

“Your point?”

“No point.” A slow, sly grin spreads across his face. “Just making an observation. I mean, I was alone and had to take out two people. By myself. Took me twenty minutes. And that includes me getting there AND back. You know all the shit I’ve done since then?”

“Nope. But I bet you’re gonna tell me, aren’t ya.”

“Took a shower, ate, slept for three hours. Now I’m eating again. And you’re getting back. Just now. It’s almost six. In the evening.”

“You’ve kept yourself busy. You jerk off sometime in there too?”

“Twice, actually.”

“Your lazy ass could have handled some more work. Instead you’ve been here slacking.”

“I’d done my bit for the day. Next time be faster.”

“Easy for you to say,” Koen scoffs. “Mister ‘I have all the experience’. You now, we could have used your help out there.”

“Oh I’m sorry. I didn’t hear that. Can you repeat it?”

“Don’t be a little prick."

“I swear you just said that you could have used MY help. I swear you just said that.”

“You’re asking for an ass kicking, you know that?”

“Funny how you wanted my help when this morning you were acting I like I didn’t know what the fuck In was doing. It’s almost like...I don’t know...like you’re actually admitting you were wrong.”

“I ain’t admitting shit. Just saying we could have used your help.”

“Why? Apparently I don’t know what I’m doing.”

“I am five seconds away from punching you in the face,” Koen growls. “And your wife won’t be too happy if I mess that face up. So…”

“Just swallow your pride and admit you’re wrong, mate. That you shouldn’t have underestimated me. Get it off your chest. It’ll make you feel better.”

“Make you feel better, you mean. I’d rather stroke your cock than your ego.”

“Well you’re definitely never getting anywhere near my cock so it’s my ego or nothing.”

“Fine,” Koen sighs heavily. “I underestimated you. I will never again second guess your skills or your abilities. But I still think you’re a brain damaged fuck.”

“I’ll take it,” Tyler says, then sits the now empty plate and Gatorade bottle on the nightstand and swings his legs over the edge of the bed. “How did it go in the end?” he asks, groaning and grimacing as he stands. Forty starting to feel like it’s closer to death, never mind middle age.

“They’re dead. So it ended on a good note. Put up a hell of a fight. Rata took an elbow to the face and went crazy. Beat the guy to death. You would have been impressed. I think he’s a natural.”

“And you?”

“I prefer the simple things in life. Pull a trigger and it’s done. I’ll leave the more hands on, gruesome shit for you two. Gotta date or something?”

“Going to the airport.” He slips into a pair of jeans and a simple black t-shirt. “Going to see my wife and kids.”

“Think that’s a good idea?”

Tyler sighs in exasperation. “Don’t fucking start this shit again.”

“Just if anyone is following you and you lead them right to your family…”

“Anil gave me the okay. Said he’s got tons of guys keeping their eyes on things. Yaz is sending a couple of people with me. So fuck off with this overprotective bullshit.”

“Now you know how your wife feels.”

“I have a reason to worry about her. A LOT of reasons. Damn good ones too. If you’re going to ride my ass so hard, at least pull my fucking hair.”

Koen smirks. “You’re into that kinda shit, aren’t ya. I knew it. Always knew you were a freak.”

“As much as I’d like to stay here and discuss my sex life with you, I’ve got better things to do.” He attaches his holster to his right hip, gathers up his wallet and hotel key card and both phones.

“You better not come back here with that ‘’just got fucked’ grin on your face,” Koen warns. “Because I will beat your ass.”

“You’ll be too busy beating something else.” Tyler retorts, right hand mimicking jerking off. Chuckling when Koen throws a shoe at him when he steps out the door.

****

It’s only a fifteen minute drive to the airport and he already knows everything there is to know about the young tech that Yaz has recruited to ‘escort’ him. It’s annoying enough not to be able to something as simple as driving, but to have to stuck with someone that is overly chatty and friendly is nothing short of torture. He’s never been a social creature; unlike his wife who makes friends easily and never shies away from making conversation with just about anyone, including strangers in the grocery store or out on the street. She’d been the first...and only...chatty person that hasn’t gotten on his nerves.

Her name is Riya and she’s twenty one; last of eight kids, her mother and father both extremely successful and wealthy business people in Dubai. The so-called ‘black sheep’ of the family; all but disowned when she’d decided to attend an American university -Georgetown- and make her home there. Even if he HAD have been talker, he wouldn’t have had the chance to offer up much commentary; her mouth running a mile a minute as she nervously and awkwardly spills even the smallest details of her life.

He doesn’t have the heart to tell her to stop her. The old Tyler...the one that existed only six short years ago...would have already snapped and told her to shut the fuck up. But who he is now...the man he is...is different in so many ways. Far more patient. Considerate. Empathetic, even. And the father of a little girl that is the very definition of a chatterbox. Who’s bright eyed and bubbly and talkative from the time she opens her eyes in the morning until the moment she closes them at night. And he wouldn’t want some asshole speaking to his own daughter like that, so why would he?

“How long HAVE you been married for?” Riya asks, and he can hear Esme’s voice in his head; reminding him that not everyone is out to get him. That their curiosity is often just that. They’re genuinely interested in him and want to be his friend.

“Six and a half years.” Sometimes it doesn’t feel nearly that long. Other times, considering all of the bad shit they’ve been through and the time they didn’t think they’d make it. It seems a hell of a lot longer.

“And five kids, right? In only six and a half years?”

“We’ve really been together for seven. Well, almost seven. But yeah. Five kids.”

“They must be really close together.”

“First three are. My daughter is six, the boys are five.”

“Twins? Identical or…?”

“Fraternal. Millie...my daughter...was only two months when we found out they were on their way. They were kind of a surprise, needless to say. We have another boy after them; he’ll be two in a few months. And we have a baby girl. Almost eight weeks.”

“Just a little one.”

Tyler nods. “Very little. Very tiny. My wife is, too, Small. But feisty as hell. And tough. Toughest and strongest person I know.”

“Yaz said you met on the job.”

“Yeah, we got sent out on the same gig, To Bangladesh. Actually had to pretend we were married.”

Riya laughs. “Really?”

“First time I ever got mixed up in something like THAT. It’s a long story, but in the end, my fake wife ended up becoming my real wife.” He doesn’t feel the need to fill in the gaps between beginning and end; Dhaka and what happened there has never been kept off the radar. Word travels fast in the dame, and every single details has been made available; everything from Mahajan fucking him over to Gaspar’s betrayal to his near death experience.

“Probably the best ending to a job you’ve ever had,” Riya comments.

“Took me nearly dying and her sticking her fingers in my neck to keep me alive, but yeah, in the end things turned out pretty damn good. What about you? You got a family? Other than the ones that don’t speak to you?”

“Nope. It’s just me. It’s hard finding someone that understands this kind of life. Who won’t judge you for it. And the people you meet through this life aren’t exactly the settling down types. As much as I want to believe I’ll meet someone, I probably should just prepare myself to be alone for the long haul.”

“There’s gotta be someone out there. Either in the game or someone who won’t be bothered by it.”

Fuck. He’s starting to sound like his wife. Years spent listening to her reason with her little sister over the phone that there has to be a guy -or girl- out there that would be into her; a full time student with five cats and a host of mental health issues and an extremely toxic family. Or hearing her talk Ovi through his personal issues; always chasing the wrong girl and left brokenhearted in the end. Normally he just stays out if; offering shrugs of the shoulders or a simple nod or a head shake when Esme attempts to get him involved.

“Maybe there is,” Riya sighs. “Do you have any single friends?”

“My single friends are single for a reason. And I’m a lot older than you and they would be too. So…”

“What about Ovi? He’s your friend. He’s young. Is he single?”

“He’s actually more my son than my friend”

“Son?” Her brow furrows in confusion. “How…?”

“Another long story. We ended up taking in him, giving him a proper home, a family. But yeah. He’s single.”

“Do you think maybe you could…?”

Tyler laughs. “Yeah...no. Just no. I’m not trying to be a dick about it, but I don’t get involved with this kind of thing. That, and I’ve got some pretty serious shit I’m dealing with and it’s definitely NOT the time even if I WAS the kind that would help. I mean, my wife likes to stick her nose where it doesn’t belong. You could always ask her to talk to him or whatever. I’m not who you want. Trust me.”

“Do you think she would? Put in a good word for me?”

“I guess,” he shrugs. “I don’t know. Look, I’m not the sociable type. So I don’t mean to come across as an asshole, but…”

“You’re honest,” she says. “I heard that about you. That you don’t say much, but you mean what you say and don’t pull any punches.”

“I can be a little harsh,” Tyler admits. “So I’ve been told, anyway. I’ve bet you heard a lot of things about me.”

She nods.

“Probably not a lot of good things.”

“More good than bad. But the bad is pretty...well...bad. I don’t know; you don’t seem that awful to me. I mean, how awful can someone be when they have a wife and five kids? No woman would stick around long enough to have one kid, never mind that many.”

“Never thought of it that way. I’m not an easy person to live with. I’ve put her through a lot. But maybe I’m not as terrible as I think I am.”

“I don’t think she’d still be around if you were. If she’s as tough and strong as you say she is, she would have hauled ass a long time ago.”

****

He’s still thinking of those words when they arrive at the airport; pulling right onto the tarmac behind the smaller hangar he’d flowed into only two days before. It feels like a lifetime has passed since then. Since he’s stood in front of his home, kissing and hugging his wife and kids goodbye and wondering if he’d ever see them again. With how successful the morning had been, he wants to be more confident in regards to the eventual outcome. But he knows how things work; each kill will get harder and messier and more complicated. Mahajan will clue into his involvement and up the stakes even more. One good day doesn’t mean you can let your guard down. Not in the slightest.

Riya waits in the car, but both drivers and passengers of the three vehicles that had followed them climb out. Staggering themselves along the tarmac, eyes surveying the surroundings; bullet proof vests under their clothing, weapons at the ready. The jet’s already arrived and the stairs being placed in front of the open door when he crosses the distances between it and the car; less than ten feet away when the first little body appears. Millie with her ever present messy hair and those Spiderman sandals; an Incredible Hulk t-shirt paired with a frilly -and glittery- pink and purple tutu over a pair of camo leggings. Her head down at first and a slight frown on her face; shrugging a unicorn and sloth themed backpack onto her shoulders and one foot tentatively checking the strength and support of the stairs in front of her. And when she finally does glance up, the look is one of shock at first. Her brow furrowed and those huge blue eyes wide and disbelieving. Then quickly widening and sparkling when realization sets in; a brilliant smile spreading across her face.

“Daddy!” She shrieks, and immediately forgets about her discomfort on the stairs, rushing down them and leaping from the second last one; not even stumbling or missing a single stride. “Daddy!”

Tyler catches her as she throws herself at him, effortlessly scooping her up into his arms. Feeling those little arms immediately circle his neck, squeezing as tight as they can and how soft her cheeks and her forehead are against his lips and how impossibly light she seems.

“You said we wouldn’t see you for a few days!” Her tone has a slight scolding quality to it.

“I thought I’d surprise you guys. I got things finished nice and early so I could come and say hi. I missed you,” he lays a hand on the back of her head and presses a kiss to her temple and then her brow. “I missed you so much.”

“I miss you too. This is the best surprise EVER.”

“Even better than getting Saju as a late birthday gift?”

"I love Saju, but I love you more. You’re my daddy. And I was worried about you. About the bad guys getting a hold of you.”

“The bad guys don’t stand against me. You know that.”

“Daddy!” TJ hollers, and soon both he and his brother -and two dogs- are racing towards him. And with Millie still on his hip, he drops down to one knee, laughing when the force of those of those small bodies - and all of the power and excitement and love inside of them- knock him off balance and he finds himself on his ass on the damp, cold tarmac. Gathering all three kids into his arms and pulling them tightly into him.

“I knew you could do it,” Tanner’s face is buried in the side of his neck, tears hot against his skin. “I knew you could beat up the bad guys and still come and see us! I missed you. I missed you so much.”

“I’ve only been gone two days, mate.”

“Doesn’t matter if it’s only two hours. I still missed you.”

“I missed you too. I missed ALL of you.”

He presses his lips to each forehead, returns each tight, fierce hug. Still sitting on the ground as he listens to all three speak at once’ excited tales about what they’d done on the plane and the movies they’d watched and the naps they’d taken and the food they’d eaten, Millie showing off her matching bracelet. And she moves out of the way when Delcan arrives; a beaming smile on his face and a ‘miss daddy’ in his tiny voice before throwing his arms around Tyler’s neck. And he runs his fingers through his son’s silky red hair and showers his cheeks with kisses and holds him as tight as Declan will let him. And even now he’s not sure he deserves all of this. The adoration and the unconditional love and their blind faith and trust in him.

“Good to see ya,” Kyle says in greeting, placing Addie -in her car seat carrier- on the ground beside him, then offering a hand to help Tyler to his feet and giving him a one armed hug. “Especially in one piece. Heard today was the day. Must have went okay. You’re standing here.”

“Went better than I thought it would. I’ll take a good start over a bad one any day.” He drops to a knee once more, smiling at his baby girl as he unfastens the straps of the carrier. “Hey sweet pea...hey little peanut…” he scoops that tiny body into his arms, settling her against his chest; a forearm under her bum, hand on the back of her head. “Daddy missed you. He missed you so much.”

“What are you even doing here?” Esme inquires as she joins them, a playful scolding tone to her voice and a look of pure relief on her face.

He grins down at her. “I guess crossing your fingers worked.”

“I guess it did,” she says, and he’s able to keep Addie pressed securely against him with one arm as he wraps the other around his wife; pulling her tightly into him, lips meeting her temple. “I know it’s only been two days,” her voice is muffled against his chest, both arms around his waist. “But I have missed you so much.”

“I missed you too. It’s felt longer than two days.”

She nods, pulling away slightly to look up at him, tears sparking in her eyes. “I was so worried about you. Everything went okay?”

“Better than I thought it would. I’ll call you later and tell you all about it. Fill you in on all the gory details.”

“Yes, because I just love your stories of mutilation and homicide. You’re okay?” Her hands rub at his sides. “You look okay.”

“I’m fine. Not a scratch on me.”

“Guess you haven’t lost your touch after all. And to think you were worried about that.” Her face turns serious, the amount of tears in her eyes increasing. “I was so fucking worried about you, Tyler.”

“I know you were.” He presses a kiss to her forehead. “It’s okay, baby. Don’t cry. Everything’s fine.”

“I’m just relieved. That I didn’t just have to take your for it and I got to see it...you...with my own eyes. I’m proud of you. I’m so proud of you.”

“Now you’re going to make ME cry.”

“Did you get the videos? Did you watch them?”

“I did. And I’m slightly concerned that my six year and five year olds are already smarter than I am.”

“I don’t think they’re anywhere near being that smart yet, but they are crazy intelligent. Almost scary HOW intelligent. We are going to have our work cut out for us, I think. Having three brainiacs in the house?”

“Four if you count their mom. Where do you think they get it from? My looks, your brain. We’ve been through this.”

“Is that some sneaky, backhanded way of calling me ugly?” she teases.

“Baby, you’re the most beautiful woman in the world, you know that. And I love you,” he places a soft kiss to her lips. “So much.”

“I love you too. And did you see Addie? Her smile? Her REAL smile? She smiles exactly like you. Her eyes crinkle and everything. So there. She DID get something from you, after all. Are you okay?” She reaches up and lays a hand on the side of her face, running her thumb over his lips. “With what happened? You’re alright?”

“I’m okay. I just missed you guys. It’s been harder than I thought it would.”

“It’s been six months. You had a whole different life for half a year. I’d be worried if going back to this WASN’T hard.”

“It’s not just that. It’s...I don’t know….” Tyler shrugs. “I can’t talk about it right now. Not with the kids around.”

“Is it about what you did?”

He nods. “About what I did. How I felt about it. How I DIDN’T feel. We’ll talk later. I can’t stay long; just in case someone is keeping an eye on me. You guys will be safer at the house than you will be standing out here talking to me.”

“Thank you. For making the effort to get here. The kids needed that; to see you. I needed that. I really needed to see you. I needed to make sure you were okay.”

“I needed to see you, too. I was worried I’d never get the chance again. And I wish I could stay longer. Or go to the house with you guys. I’d give anything to be able to do that. Anything.”

She gives a small, understanding smile. “I know you would.”

“I gotta go.” He holds Addie out in front of him, kissing her forehead. “I love you, little peanut. Stop growing up so fast. You might be the last one.”

“We’ll talk about that later too,” Esme says, and he leans down to press a kiss to her temple before placing Addie in her arms. “I love you. We’ll see you in a few days, right?”

“Yep.” He attempts a reassuring smile, then kisses her; long and soft and sweet. “I love you. Call me when the kids are asleep. We’ll talk about stuff.”

“Okay,” she agrees, squeezing him tightly and burying her face in her chest once more when he gives her one last hug. Holding onto him longer and tighter than before. Unable to control the tears that trickle down her face.

****

“You should see this place,” Esme says four hours later, after all the kids have finally settled in their rooms and have managed to fall asleep. “Remember when we stayed at Mahajan’s? What that place was like? Well this Mahajan’s on steroids. I am serious. Ten bedrooms. TEN! And eleven bathrooms! Who cleans all those bathrooms? We have three and we can’t keep up half the time. And the master ensuite is bigger than our entire bedroom. And our room at home is what I consider huge.”

He can’t hold but smile at the youthful exuberance in her voice. He knows she’s exhausted; physically and emotionally. Not just from a twelve hour flight with five kids, but with everything that’s gone down within the past month and a half. But he can hear the difference; being in Mumbai and closer to him has lifted some of the stress and worry, replacing it with relief and at least some peace of mind.

“And you should the shit this guy has,” she continues. “I’ve never seen anything like it. An underground garage full of insanely expensive exotic cars. A home theatre, indoor and outdoor pools and jacuzzis, his own tennis and basketball courts. Who needs all this stuff? I thought we had a lot of stuff. This? This is our stuff times a thousand.”

“We have a lot of stuff...normal stuff...because we have five kids. He has a lot of stuff because he doesn't have anyone or anything else to spend his money on.”

“”I mean, we have money too. We’re not exactly poor. Not anymore, anyway.”

“We don’t have his kind of money, babe. What we have in the bank is like a month’s salary to him.”

“We also don’t buy stuff just to buy and have stuff. This is just insane to me. And the animals. It’s not one or two, Tyler. It’s its own goddamn zoo. He’s got tigers and monkeys and peacocks and a sloth. And snakes. So many snakes. Don’t even get me started in the snakes. All I have to say is thank god they’re far enough away from the house and securely contained. Because you know my fear of snakes.”

“I don’t know where this fear comes from. We’ve only had one snake in the house so far”

“In my shoe!” She reminds him. “Which I tried to stick my foot into, thank you very much.”

“What was one of the first things I told you when we first moved back to Australia? Especially where we moved TO. Check your shoes before you put them on. If you listened to me more often…”

“What if it bit me?”

“You would have lived because it wasn’t poisonous. And it was a baby. The way you fucking screamed, you would have though it was an anaconda trying to eat one or two of the kids.”

“I don’t like snakes. I told this when we first lived there. That I’m scared of them but I loved you enough to live somewhere where there’s tons of them. And you promised you’d be the one to handle them. And the spiders.”

“Which I have. And the dingoes. Have I let a dingo get you?”

“You’re probably waiting for the opportunity to feed me to one.”

“Baby, if I wanted to get rid of you, there’s about a hundred different ways I could do it. And feeding you to a dingo is NOT one of them. And I don’t want to get rid of you, so…” He stretches his legs out in front of him, resting his bare feet on the top railing of the balcony. “...you’re safe.”

“What I don’t understand is our children’s fascination and love of snakes and spiders. If you didn’t encourage them to pick the damn things up and let them crawl all over them…”

“They’re not dangerous. They can’t hurt the kids. Let’s not raise pussies, okay? They have to learn about stuff, yeah? Let them learn. As long as they’re not in danger, what’s the worst that could happen? What are they going to do? Want a Huntsman as a pet?”

“I will refuse to step foot in the house again,” she declares. “I will move out. I will live with Ovi in the guest house. If you EVER let the kids do anything like that, I swear…”

“I’d miss you too much. I know what lines I can’t cross.”

“Speaking of lines you shouldn’t cross. Who’s the girl you were with tonight?”

“Are you serious right now?”

“What? You thought I wouldn’t notice you left with her?”

Tyler grins. “Esme, are you jealous?”

“Do I have a reason to be?”

“I kind of like this. You getting all jealous. You getting all worked up. It’s kinda hot, actually. And no, you don’t have a reason to be jealous. She’s young enough to be my kid.”

“Maybe she likes older men.”

“Good for her. But I like you, so…”

“So who is she?”

“Riya. She works for Nik. She’s from Dubai. Apparently her folks are loaded and basically disowned her for going to school in the States and picking the job she did. Sound familiar?”

“That DOES seem a little too close to home for my liking.”

“She actually wants to talk to you.”

“Oh how cute,” Esme scoffs. “She wants my permission before she bangs my husband. Well at least this is asking before she tries.”

“Only person I want to bang is you. And she wants to talk to you about Ovi.”

“Ovi? What about him?”

“You’re the one who can’t stay out of other peoples’ business, right? You like meddling in relationships.”

“Pardon me? It’s advising. Not meddling. Advising.”

“She wants you to hook her up.”

“With Ovi?”

“Are you following along at all or have I been talking to myself?”

“I mean, it’s Ovi. He’s like my kid. No. Scratch that. He IS my kid. I can’t set him up./”

“Why not?”

“Do you want me setting Millie up? Or TJ? Or Tanner?”

“First off, Millie is six. The boys are five. It’s not the same thing. Just do it. Put in a good word for her.”

“So now you’re encouraging me to meddle? That’s a first for you.”

“I’m encouraging you to help a poor, desperate girl out. And Ovi too. He’s been acting like a little bitch since Chloe took off and I can’t can’t take much more. So do me a solid and save what’s left of my sanity and help Ovi get laid.”

“Okay, wow. THAT’S a little disturbing. Isn’t that supposed to be your thing? Anything sex related? You’re a guy. You find him a piece of ass. Call one of your hoes from your old little black book.”

“Actually, I didn’t have anyone in India,” Tyler admits.

“You poor baby,” she scoffs. “My heart bleeds for you. And find. I will put in a good word for this girl. But if you want him to get laid, you figure out how to make it happen. And don’t sample the goods, either.”

“Only goods I want to sample are yours. So why don’t you come over here and let me.”

“You’re hurting, aren’t you,” Esme laughs.

“A little. It’s been forever.”

“It’s been two days, Tyler.”

“Feels like it’s been forever. What are you wearing?”

“Are you serious right now? You want to have phone sex?”

“You can’t come here and I can’t go there, so…”

“I’m wearing a lovely combination of premenstrual syndrome, baby puke, and dog hair.”

“Now THAT’S sexy. PMS, huh? So things are going back to normal that way.”

“It was going to happen eventually,” Esme sighs. “After the next one, they can take everything out. I’m done. I won’t need any of it anymore. They can have it. If I never have a period again, that’s fine by me, I’d say it’s good for you too because you won’t have to put up with my extreme bitchiness once a month, but you have two daughter who will go through this one day.”

He frowns “Can Addie at least get to her first birthday before we talk about this shit?”

“It’s going to happen, Tyler. I mean it could happen to Millie in a few years. I was ten.”

“Esme, for fuck sakes. I don’t…”

“Sorry, honey. I hate to break your heart like this. But one day it’s going to happen. And one day she’s even going to want to have sex and need to go on birth control and…”

“Do you want a divorce? Because bringing this shit up is how you get a divorce.”

“I love you, Tyler James. You’re my favorite human And I love how you can impale someone with a garden rake but you can’t handle the thought of your daughter maturing. You’re so fucking cute. You’re so cute, I’d have phone sex with you right now if my cramps weren’t so bad. I am telling you, after the next one? My body is done. That’s it. Take it all out. It’s not needed anymore.”

“Next one? I thought we weren’t going to talk about that until I got home.”

“I made the decision. Without you.”

He smirks. “Oh, so you mean like you usually do about everything.”

“Pretty much. If you really want another one…”

“You gotta want it too. Not just me. I don’t want you doing it just because I want it.”

“I do want to. One more. An even number. And if something happens like it did with the one that should have been between the twins and Declan…”

Tyler sighs. “I don’t want to talk about this.”

“We stop if something goes wrong. Because once was bad enough. Well twice, if I count the one with Mark. I can’t keep having my heart broken like that. And if we can’t successfully carry another one, we just stop. Okay?”

“Okay,” he agrees. “And it wasn’t fun for me, either. Going through that. It was my baby too.”

“I know. But you were amazing and so good with me and it made me love you even more. I’m worried about you, Tyler. There was something in your eyes tonight. When you talked about what you did today. I can’t put my finger on it. I just know what I saw and that I’ve never seen it before. It wasn’t old Tyler OR new Tyler. I don’t know who it was.”

“Before I tell you what’s going on, I need to tell you what I did. And I know you hate hearing the gory details. But I need to tell you.”

“Okay…” There’s a slight rustle of the phone as she shifts positions in bed. “...I’m not going to sleep for a couple days after this, am I.” While she accepts and supports what he does, she draws the line at hearing the details. She’d seen enough in Dhaka, and once that was over, so was her desire to ever see -or think about- another drop of blood again. “Did you shoot them?”

“No. I didn’t shoot them. I was more...hands on.”

“Like your bare hands, or…?”

“Sort of. I kinda slit a guy’s throat and gutted another one. Literally.”

“Okay…”

“And I liked it. I liked doing it. And I’ve never liked doing it before. I killed because I had to. Because I had to keep myself alive. Now I’m doing it because I WANT to. Because I enjoy it. That’s fucked, yeah? Tell me that’s fucked. That I’M fucked.”

“I wouldn’t say it’s fucked. And I definitely won’t say you’re fucked. And I can’t say I’m totally shocked. Or shocked at all, to be honest.”

“Maybe we’re both fucked,” he says. “And not in the good, fun way either.”

“Well before you question our levels of depravity and insanity, let’s look at this for what it is. This isn’t a normal job. This isn’t what you’re used to. You’re used to not having any emotional ties to what you do. You go in, you do what you have to do, you get out. That’s it. You don’t know these people, you don’t know the people they’re hurting, none of that. You’re not connected to any of them, right?”

“Right.”

“Well this time you DO have a connection. A very personal one. These people threatened your family. And I don’t know exactly what the threats are, but they must be pretty bad if you won’t tell me. I mean, people are saying horrible, twisted things about people you love. About me and your kids. It doesn’t get more fucked up than that; threatening children. Addie’s one of them and she’s just a baby. What kind of fucked person says shit like that about a baby?”

“Evil people,” Tyler concludes. “Really fucking evil.”

“And you’re pissed. To your very core. I see if in your eyes, Tyler. I hear it in your voice. How angry you actually are. How disgusted you are. And you have every right to feel those things. This is as personal as it gets. And you wonder why you enjoyed it? I’d enjoy it too if someone threatened you and I got to kill them. I’d enjoy every fucking second.”

“It just makes me feel like such a dick,” he admits. “Like I’m a horrible fucking person. I made the one guy look at me. Made him watch me while I slit his throat. And he recognized me. He knew who I was. And I liked that he did. That my face was the last thing he saw.”

“And that doesn’t make you a bad person,” Esme says. “A bad person wouldn’t be worried that it makes him a bad person. You’re a good person, Tyler. I know you struggle to see that. But I see it. And I know it. I know who you are away from all of this. I know how loving you are. How gentle you are. What you did today...what you felt or didn’t feel...that doesn’t erase who you are or what you’re like away from all of this.”

He blinks back tears “This is fucked. This all so fucked.”

“You’re doing what you have to do. You’re stopping them before they can do the same thing to us. Or worse.”

“Definitely worse. Much, much worse.”

“Do you want to tell me what the threats were or…”

“No. You don’t need to hear that. You don’t need that shit in your head. It’s bad enough it’s in mine. That it’s probably never going to leave.”

“We’ll work on that,” Esme promises. “Your brain. When we get home. We’ll work on it TOGETHER. Okay?”

“Okay.”

“I love you, Tyler. So much. And I wish I could be right there with you. I know this isn’t easy for you. That you’re struggling with so many things. But I love you and I’m so proud of you.”

He swallows around the lump of emotion sitting in this throat and using a forearm to wipe the tears from his face. “I love you. And this sucks. Being away from you. You’re so close but it’s like you’re so fucking far.”

“If you need me there, I can find a way. And I will. You know me. I’m pretty sneaky and tenacious on a good day.”

He gives a small chuckle. “Yeah, you are.”

“And there’s nothing I wouldn’t do for you. So if you need me there….”

“I’m okay. For now anyway. Stay with the kids. They need you.”

“So do you. Even if you won’t admit it.”

“I do. Need you. But they need you more.”

“Promise me you’ll call if it gets worse. If you change your mind. Because I’ll figure it out. How to get to you and stay with you. Promise me.”

“I promise. I’ll call you if I need you.”

“Get some sleep, okay? It’s been a long day. Call me in the morning. Just so I know how you’re doing.”

“I will.”

“And thank you. For showing up tonight. Seeing you did a world of good for the kids. Especially Tanner. He’s finally smiling again. And he has such a beautiful smile. YOUR smile. And it did me a world of good too. To see you. I miss you, And your arms. It was really nice to be in those arms again,”

“It felt good to have you in them. Hopefully in a few days…”

“It’ll happen. I know it will. You’re doing fine. Just keep doing what you have to do. That’s it. We’ll talk in the morning, okay? I love you.”

“I love you too.”

“Get some sleep,” she gently orders, and then disconnects the call.

#tyler rake #tyler rake fan fic #tyler rake fan fiction #extraction #best part of me #chris hemsworth character

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unofficialkfamtranscripts · 4 years

Text

King Falls AM - Episode Thirteen: Crop Circle Jerk

View on Google Docs Summary: November 1, 2015 - An emergency at Libbydale Farms has Deputy Troy and King Falls AM on high alert. Mysterious lights? Check. Crop Circles? Check. Intergalactic Gang War? Stay tuned to 660 on the AM Dial to find out.

[podcast intro music]

[S&B show intro]

Ben Good evening! You’re listening to King Falls AM – that’s 660 on the radio dial.

Sammy Folks, we are jumping right into it tonight. We got Deputy Troy on the line, live from Libbydale Farms. Hey, Troy, can you hear us alright?

Troy Loud and clear, Sammy. Heard you real fine, too, Ben.

Ben [muttered] Suck an egg.

Sammy Okay. So, Troy. Tell the listeners what you just told us right before we went on air.

Troy Ladies and gents, in all my years— and I mean all of ‘em— I ain’t never seen anything like this! Not even comparatively close to what I’m lookin’ at right this instant. [faint sounds of police radio in bg]

Ben POINT. GET TO IT.

Troy Gosh darnit, Ben. I’m trying to sell the magnitude of what I’m feastin’ my eyes on!

Ben Who even knew you could see Libbydale Farms from so far out in the Kiss Ass Sea aboard the SS Backstabber.

Troy You know G-D well I’m not on a ship nor would it be called the SS Backstabber if I were. Don’t be so damn sore, Ben! Everybody knows I’m sorry! Plus- [kinda shyly] I reckon my ship be called the- USS Super Badass.

Sammy *pointedly clears throat* Troy. Ben. Let’s put our differences aside and let’s get to the matter at hand. So, Troy, you’re live at—?

Ben & Troy Libbydale Farms…

Troy & Ben I’m trying to talk!

Sammy GUYS!

Troy A-a-as I was sayin. I’m out here at the farm and out past the barns just hours ago, Old Man Libbydale called us in, and acres upon acres, boys, have been De.Stroyed out here.

Ben [accusingly] Where were yoouu, earlier this evening, Troy?

Troy Using my keen detective skills and ninja-like mental agility, I can see you’re trying to place me at the scene of the crime, little buddy. However Ol’ Troy was sawin’ logs next to the Mrs. before. my. shift.

Ben While crimes are being committed? *scoffs* Typical.

Troy Now that’s a low blow just be—

[shouting over each other] Ben NO! NO! Troy —low my pistol belt— Ben YOUU— N— TROOYY!— Troy — Ben come on— Ben — T— OHH Troy — this ain’t about the farm— Ben [mocking] OHH YEAHHH- OHHH YOU’RE SOOO— Troy — and you know— Ben —GOOD AT FIGHTING—

Sammy GUYS! GUYS! [“break it up kids”/dad-voice] I understand there’s renewed intensity between you two, but Ben, as co-host of this show and a respected journalist— put it away. Troy, you’re the first friend of the Sammy & Ben Show and a deputy sheriff. You guys don’t have to be best buddies, but let’s please report- on the news story- at hand.

Troy Couldn’t have said it better myself, Sammy.

Ben [hissed] Jesus.

Sammy So, Troy. Old Man Libbydale called you out— Acres of his lands destroyed. How so?

Troy Y’all ain’t gonna believe it, but you know I always shoot you straight… Two words: Crop. Circles.

Sammy [incredulous] Crop circles?

Troy It’s like a live action Led Zeppelin album cover as far as the eye can see! Big ones, little ones. The craziest damn designs you ever could imagine.

Ben Troy, I assume you and the rest of Gunderson’s thugs— I-mean-”deputies”— inspected the circles, and the surrounding areas, for man-made tools? There have been stories that men with boards tied to ropes can replicate what people believe crop circles to look like. Bending the crops at the right angles, etcetera… did you find—

Troy Didn’t find anything, Ben. Not a board… not a footprint… nothin’ but hunched over crops.

Ben So you think—?

Troy Oh, there isn’t a doubt in my mind it’s from the UFOs or those lights. I mean, whichever you wanna call it. No man made these! And in just a few hours to boot!

Sammy Okay. So, has this ever happened here before, Ben?

Ben No! Nor abductions! Not even lights being so close to town. The past few months- have been a hotbed for extraterrestrial activity— it would seem.

Sammy “It would seem”? So you aren’t certain?

Ben *scoff/laugh* I only said “it would seem” so you wouldn’t get all defensive about it.

Sammy Okay, alright. Well, as much as I hate to say it, I definitely feel there’s a lot more than meets the eye here in Kings Falls.

Ben I’m not one to say “I told you so”… But I DID tell you so!

Troy Just so everybody out there knows: Libbydale Farms is private property. So, unless you’re doing the dairy farm tour in mornin’, this is not an attraction for looky-loos. There is an official investigation still ongoin’ here. Plus, don’t nobody need another person gettin’ snatched up by the Martians either.

Ben *smug snort* Martians are from Mars, Troy. They aren’t representative of all extraterrestrials?.

Troy [defensive] Whatever— Ben Nye the Science Guy. I’m headin’ out to the field again. I might not be smart as Ben about the aliens and such, but I can definitely sniff out a spot where the Williams boys will come lookin’ for Mischief and Mayhem. [click]

[dial tone]

Sammy Deputy Troy, folks. Now, I didn’t realize you and Troy were still so angry at one another, Ben. You can’t let that hostility clou—

Ben THANKS, DAD! — We’re just gonna take a break to hear from one of our fine sponsors. Maybe Sammy here can talk to me about the birds and the bees after we get back.

Sammy [quietly] Maybe…

[disquieting, melancholic piano music]

Soft, disquieting voice What if what you thought wasn’t really what you thought you thought? … Ever think of that? … Here at the Institute of Science, we can help you become what you’ve always wanted to become… A better you, for a better mankind! Call us today for a free brochure and a C-meter reading. That’s “C” as in “cat.” … We’re coming King Falls… Be well! … And be ready.

[piano fades out]

[S&B theme]

Sammy You’re listening to King Falls AM and we are opening up the phone lines to you. 424-279-3858.

Ben We’ll be talking about the apparent crop circle- situation at Libbydale Farms. As well as if any of you out there have had any experience with this phenomenon.

Sammy So give us a call or tweet us @kingfallsam. So, you’ve heard our story, now let’s hear yours.

Ben Line 3.

Sammy Good evening, you’re live with Sammy and Ben.

Cynthia Good evening? For who? Certainly not King Falls!

Sammy Hi, Cynthia. How ‘bout you tell us how you really feel tonight.

Cynthia Weellll, to be honessst, I’m a little rattled over these gang signs the aliens are leaving on our turf. Literally.

Ben Cynthia— there is no way to tell if those circles are- angry orrr happy! even. They’re *huff/laugh* just symbols.

Cynthia So’s a swastika, Ben Arnold. Get your head out of your tuchus!

Sammy Okay, obviously, we aren’t trying to raise alarms here, Cynthia. It’s just, uh— it’s an interesting story. Especially here in our backyard. Would you not agree? Uh, you know, it’s not every day you can see this kind of handiwork – man-made or otherwise.

Cynthia You two sound sooo happy. We’re getting tagged in an intergalactic war and all of us in the Falls are sitting around at ground zero.

Ben I- don’t think that’s fair t—

Cynthia That’s the problem! You just. don’t. think! It’s all Tim Jenson’s fault, I just know it. We didn’t have any flying saucer, land-tattooing bedlam before he chased those lights.

Ben He didn’t “chase” anything! He was driving from work and called to report on a breaking news story.

Cynthia Watch your tone, Ben. I’ll buy one of those rabid, disease-ridden sugar flyers and toss it in Lake Hatchenhaw. just to spite you!

Sammy Goodnight, Cynthia.

Ben Sugar glider. And- they are. illegal.

Cynthia So are illegal aliens, but you’re just getting ready to throw ‘em a parade! I can’t! I just can’t! [click]

[dial tone]

Sammy Heh, alright, uh… Line 12, you’re live on King Falls AM.

Emily Hi, Sammy! Hi, Ben!

Ben Emily! I–I didn’t realize you were back in town!

Emily I just got back. I was listening on the way in! My mom and I actually drove by the farm and saw all the commotion over there. Police; reporters— big lawn-mower thingies…

Ben Lawn mowers?

Sammy Uh, y’ know, if you don’t mind me asking, Emily, why were you out of town?

Emily Oh, I flew out to Buford, Wyoming,[1] for the annual small town librarian expo! And I had my mom pick me up from the airport since— Ben was on the air.

Sammy Wow. So you guys are in the taking and picking up from the airport stage of yourrr—

Ben Friendship. Is that the- word- you’re- searching for, Sammy?

Sammy [kinda smug] Thaaat was exactly the one, Ben.

Emily *soft laugh* You guys are so silly. But I just wanted to say “hi” and tell Ben I’m back home now!— Oh! And starting next week, I’ve got a whole bunch of fun activities I learned from the expo to start doing at the library! Hopefully we can get some of the scared kids back now.

Ben I’ll call you later, Emily.

Emily Goodnight, Ben! Night, Sammy!

[click, dial tone]

Sammy Emily Potter, ladies and gents. King Falls Librarian and Ben’s… Friend.

Ben [shyly] Yeah-yeah… Lucky Line 1, you’re on King Falls AM.

Greg Hey, guys! It’s Greg Frickard!

Sammy Hi, Greg! You know, we appreciate you running the ads on the show, sir. It’s so nice to meet youuu… uh, over the phone, of course.

Greg Thanks, Sammy! I— think— we’ve- talked before, and uh, glad to run the spot! Me and Granny Frickard love the show! You should hop on down to the Froggery and we’ll hook ya up!

Sammy I might have to take you up on that offer, Greg!

Greg We’d love to have you! You too, Ben…

Ben Greg, you’re a lifelong King Falls resident… w-we’ve been talking about the crop circles out at –

Greg Oh I know. I’ve been listening, but— I was actually calling about- sssomething else— if that’s okay.

Sammy Uh, yyyeah. Sure thing, Greg. What’s on your mind?

Greg Well, I heard Ben and Miss Potter a second ago and they made a— declaration of friendship? Is that correct?

Sammy Oh! U-uh. Is- this about Emily?

Ben [suspicious] Did you- call before, when Emily was in the studio, Greg?

Greg Uh, noo… *nervous laugh* that must have beeeen… somebody else. But is that true, Ben? Are you and Miss Potter just friends?

Ben [terse] Good friends. *tsk* Close. Friends… Real close.

Greg Huhhh! … Well th- okay! That’s all I needed to know! Thanks a million, buddy.

Sammy Hey— Greg. You didn’t have a comment orr—

Greg Oh, no, no! I j— *chuckles* I don’t know the first thing about crop circles and— what-have-you. Uhh, it’s real interesting and all! but- Miss Potter’s lovely voice just… [sighing dreamily] speaks to me. I always just assumed that Ben and Emily were… “bf” and “gf” respectively, *laughs* but… if that’s not the case, thennn…

Sammy Ben? You okay?

Ben I don’t like putting our— personal lives out there in the public eye…

Greg Well, gee, Ben, I’m— only asking because ifff you’re into friendship with the lovely Miss Potter, and— I’m afraid, uhhh, I might just have to be into courtship. *chuckle* Granny wants to see me married before going into the great By-and-By—

Ben Bye-bye to you too! Greg. Looks like we lost line—

Greg I’m still here, pals! Now about that thing—

Ben [click, dial tone] Line 7, you’re on King Falls AM?

Sammy Did you just hang up onnn—

Ben I would never. LINE 7.

Herschel I’d like to place a complaint, rrright this instant.

Sammy Herschel?

Ben Is everything okay, Mr. Baumgartner?

Herschel Would I call into you nincompoops if everything was hunky-dory?

Ben I guess not… No.

Sammy So, what seems to be the issue, Herschel?

Herschel All this yackin’ about G-D UFOs and crop circles, for starters. Makes my damn d[bleep]k itch.

Sammy Sir! This is—

Herschel Did you call me to tell me what to think, comrade? Or did I call you to talk about an issue?

Sammy Please continue, Mr. Baumgartner…

Herschel Thank you. So, I’m out on the lake tonight— got up brright and early, so I could make sure I got my special spot.

Ben “Got up early”? It’s— just now a little past 2…

Herschel You the sleep police?! Ya little bastard… I thought not.

Ben Sorry, Herschel.

Herschel So I’m trollin, out on the… well. That parts Top Secret, boys. But I’m trollin, so I don’t scare the bigguns away, and those g[bleep]ddamn sons of b[bleep]chin’ rainbow lights start blowin’ through the sky. Looked like Joseph’s Amazing Technicolor Dreamcoat[2] was fightin’ that big Jap lizard!

Sammy Godzilla? Please don’t use derogatory wor—

Herschel McCarthy[3] would’a skinned your ass alive, you Red[4] sack ‘a sh[bleep]t! Can I tell my story?!

Sammy Of course, I’m just asking you not to—

Ben [quickly] I’m on the button. Sammy. Heh. Herschel’s gonna Herschel!

Sammy Okay. So, you saw the lights tonight…

Herschel Saw ‘em? Hell. They scared the literal piss out of me. Got a trickle down my Carhartts[5] look like the state of Florida. I’m out here naked as a jaybird! Not a fish in sight.

Ben I’m sorry, did you just reference a musical, Mr. Baumgartner?

Herschel Oh, just ‘cause I like some colorful metaphors, means I can’t be refined, Ben?!

Ben I wasn’t— I didn’t– im-imply— I’m-I’m just saying—

Herschel [softly, for Herschel] Ol’ Mrs. Baumgartner, (god rest your sexy soul, Edna), used to love those hippy-dippy singing plays. And I’d do anything to keep in those pants, fellas.

Sammy Oh, god.

Ben Awww. [pleading] Can we get back to the lights?

Herschel That Edna. Oh, lemme tell ya… Oh! Uh, yeah– the damn lights! Yeah, so, I saw ‘em. What the hell else am I supposed to tell ya about it?!

Sammy Well, you were calling to complain about them, I’m sure.

Herschel That’s right! I’d like to report that no-good drunkard! Cecil Sheffield! Called that cumbersome ass-wart damn near 15 times to come bring me a pair of skivvies to no avail! Avoiding my calls and his duties as the co-winner of this damn boat!

Ben It’s— so late, Mr. Baumgartner. I’m-I’m sure he’s sleeping now.

Herschel You would take up with him!

Sammy W-well, Ben’s just sayin’ that he isn’t avoiding you so much as he’s, you know— probably asleep.

Herschel Sleeping one off! Soggy son of a b[bleep]h. He knows if I ring the special line, it’s a damn emergency.

Ben So, you guys have made up?

Herschel Made up my ass! If he’s gonna be “co”-anything with Herschel F. Baumgartner, that tally-whacker’s gonna have to keep up his end of the bargain.

Sammy To be at your beck and call in case you… soil yourself…

Herschel Don’t be crass!

Ben So, you guys are actually sharing the boat? That’s awesome! I figured you only—

Herschel I ain’t sharin a damn thing with that son of a b[bleep]h! Stop stirrin’ the pot or I’ll make what Charlie did to John McCain look like foreplay, Ben Arnold!

Sammy So, to the point. You’re calling to complain about Cecil because he’s sleeping through your time of need?

Ben But! He is corroborating seeing the lights, Sammy! That’s a big deal.

Herschel Just have an intern or something bring me some britches and stop fiddle fu[bleep]ing fuss! 32 long! I’ll be at Begley’s. He’s probably peering out his window lookin for a damn show… I don’t like beige! [click]

[dial tone]

Sammy You’re on King Falls AM with Sammy and Ben.

Riley Please hold the line for Mayor Grisham.

Sammy This again?

Ben *groans*

Sammy You know, I wonder, do you wake him when we say special keywords, or…?

Riley Mayor? You’re on with Sammy and Ben.

Grisham Sammy. Ben. I hate to rain on your little topic of discussion tonight, but let’s shut it down. It’d be much appreciated.

Ben What??

Sammy The always-fair, Mayor Grisham, folks. Remember this come election time next year.

Grisham Do you think that a public servant should have to call the local “Tom & Joe Chucklehut Show” to ask them not to jeopardize a police investigation?

Sammy Do you ever call Channel 13 and tell them what to report and how? We are a topical late night talk show, Grisham.

Grisham Mayor.

Sammy I didn’t vote for you.

Grisham Fair enough. I don’t expect you to respect anything but your own pathetic grab for ratings. Now, regarding Channel 13—

Ben Sorry, Mayor. Obviously, Sammy is flustered. He wouldn’t have used such a bad example if he was thinking straight—

Grisham The answer to your question, Sammy, is no. I wouldn’t call in and tell a reputable news agency how to do their job. BUT, amazingly enough, I continue to have to ask you to stop your rhetoric— seemingly once a month or so. Interesting, don’t you think?

Ben You do realize the only people that watch Channel 13 are drunks that can’t find the remote and animals left alone with the TV on, right?

Grisham Whatever helps you sleep better, Ben. I can tell you for a fact that, right now, Storm Sanders is probably not working a “local yokel” interview and digging up the muck. He’s reporting on city ordinance 29.44371.

Ben Storm is knee deep in a barrel of backyard bathtub hooch during commercial breaks.

Sammy So, Mayor. What is this ordinance? Ya know, since we aren’t reporting the news to your liking, give us a glimpse into what works for you.

Grisham The add-on to the local YMCA? The new menu over at Rose’s! I’m not paid a handsome salary to do your job.

Sammy Oh, right! I forget you think you can dictate what we report on, for free.

Ben Sammy… they’re destroying the crop circles! That’s the ordinance!

Grisham There’s hope for you yet, Ben. Don’t go down with this ship. I’ll put a good word in for you elsewhere.

Sammy You son of a b[bleep]h! You’re destroying the crop circles?! That could be the only thing that brings Tim Jenson home!

Grisham Don’t bring Tim Jenson into this! The city is paying Libbydale Farms a fair share for their remaining crops! But it is in the public’s best interest to mow down this batch of mischief accordingly! Especially after this broadcast.

Sammy *derisive scoff/laugh* You are despicable.

Grisham These affairs aren’t your business to ramble on about… Do the weather! Talk about traffic! I mean, I filled those potholes! Stop making trouble!

Sammy Freedom of the Press. When your assistant isn’t typing out our every word, maybe have her look it up and tell you all about it.

Grisham I can’t wait to hear about it! And here’s a little phrase for you to look up too! OBSTRUCTION OF JUSTICE.

Sammy Uh-huh.

Grisham Do you think using your connections to officers of the law to report on “breaking news” is fine and dandy, Stevens?? *sniffs* You are perverting the course of this case. Things— especially ongoing issues— aren’t meant to be talked about until all the facts are out there! And you— *sniffs* IDIOTS are playing on the scene, reporting with your bagel-eating buddy! who happens to be a cop.

Ben *scoffs* ‘s not my buddy.

Sammy BEN.

Ben I’m not throwing you under the bus, Sammy. I just hate Troy.

Grisham So, the moral of the story would be, gents… some things require couth. Some things require kid gloves when handling. And most things don’t need to be aired in the public for ratings and entertainment. A perfect example being how, I’m sure Sheriff Gunderson will handle Deputy Krieghauser on his own, for calling into this joke of a show with police business constantly. Doubt you’ll see that done during a press conference.

Ben Uh… is that… really necessary, sir?

Grisham This show is a breeding ground for incompetence, and you’re now dragging your pals down with you. Straighten Up and Fly Right.

Sammy Troy doesn’t need to be punished for you to make your point, Grisham.

Grisham Out Of My Hands… I’ve already had Riley send my opinions on it over to the good sheriff! Now again, I ask you: pick a different topic of discussion. Maybe one that won’t lead to the continued pain and misery for all those around you. Night night, fellas! [click]

[dial tone]

Sammy [quickly] I’m gonna call Troy.

Ben Umm, uh *nervous stuttering* W-we’ll be back after this— King Falls. We’ll- we’ll take some- calls about uhh… *helpless scoff* I guess we’ll- see…

[KFAM outro]

[CREDITS]

References

[1] Buford, Wyoming - “America’s Smallest Town”, Buford is mostly just a convenience store/gas station. The population was 1-2 from ~1995 until it was completely abandoned in 2017.

[2] Joseph’s Amazing Technicolor Dreamcoat - Joseph and the Amazing Technicolor Dreamcoat is a musical comedy with lyrics by Tim Rice and music by Andrew Lloyd Webber. The story is based on the "coat of many colors" story of Joseph from the Bible's Book of Genesis.

[3] McCarthy - Joseph Raymond McCarthy was a Republican U.S. Senator from 1947 until his death in 1957. Beginning in 1950, McCarthy became the most visible public face of the “Red Scare”, a period in the United States in which Cold War tensions fueled fears of widespread Communist subversion. He is known for alleging that numerous Communists and Soviet spies and sympathizers had infiltrated the United States federal government, universities, film industry, and elsewhere.

[4] Red - Communist

[5] Carhartts - Carhartt, Inc., is a U.S.-based apparel company founded in 1889. Carhartt is known for its work clothes, such as jackets, coats, overalls, coveralls, vests, shirts, jeans, dungarees, fire-resistant clothing and hunting clothing.

#king falls am #king falls #kfam #sammy stevens #Ben Arnold #kfam transcripts #kfam ep13 #troy krieghauser #cynthia higgenbaum #emily potter #greg frickard #herschel baumgartner #mayor grisham

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angrylizardjacket · 4 years

Text

i keep digging myself down deeper // charlotte&lola

Summary: Lola takes Charlotte to confront her mother after finding out that she lied about Lola’s dad’s death. Lola is plotting a murder. Charlotte is trying to fix her moral compass. They still end up in a graveyard.

A/N: tagging @misscharlottelee as always, and @local-troubled-writer . this made me so fucking sad folks. also i think lola is overall a better person in this au and im so sad about the main story too now. wrote it at work.

[run to paradise au]

“Take Charlotte,” Doc says, like it’s the easiest thing in the world, like he knows Lola’s on a knife-edge and can trust the younger woman to pull her back. He says it like he’s trying to throw a wrench in whatever malicious scheme she’s concocting that she thinks he doesn’t know about it.

Take Charlotte. Unlike you, she’s good. Is what Lola hears, and it sets her teeth on edge. It could have been Tommy, but Doc knows better than anyone that Lola’s got that man wrapped around her little finger, though he’s the backup if Charlotte won’t go, because god knows Lola hates Mick enough to murder him on a trip out of state, and she and Nikki together will never do anything good. He could ask Vince, but that’s asking for trouble, and Vince has actually kind of settled down. Lola on a rampage is liquid heroin, and Vince is finally in recovery. So take Charlotte, somehow the only stable one of the lot.

“We’re going to pay respects to your dad, right?” Charlotte’s got a backpack full of clothes for if they stay longer than intended, and Razzle on her heels, offering to drive them both to the airport. Lola confirms. “And Doc doesn’t trust you?”

“No he does not,” Lola grumbles through her teeth, throwing a glance over her shoulder at Nikki, on the sofa wearing only his boxers, covered in scratches and hickeys.

“He’s a smart man,” Charlotte says with a smile, but Lola’s not matching her energy, just rolls her eyes. That being said, Lola’s at the very least grateful that Charlotte’s not walking on eggshells around her the way everyone else seemed to, Nikki notwithstanding, since she’d found out her father had died when she was nine, and her mother had lied about it to her, and she’d believed that he’d just left because she was a bad kid ever since.

But now she was out for revenge, had told Doc she’d just wanted to visit her father’s grave, but the moment she’d been given the go-ahead, she knew she was heading home to confront and kill her mother for everything she’d put Lola through.

When they get on the plane, Lola’s pretty sure she can see Razzle waving from the terminal, and when she points this out, Charlotte leans over her and waves back, despite Lola’s noise of disgust.

“Don’t be like that Lols, notice how I didn’t say anything about your hickeys and band aids on the way here? You look like you had a raccoon try and rip out your jugular,” Charlotte tells her with a smirk, sitting back before avoiding her gaze, “and I don’t think Nikki would give it up that hard if you were still really grieving, so what’s your real plan here?” Cutting straight to the point, she’s so unbelievably no-nonsense about it, seeing through Lola before Lola had even fed her a lie. Lola knows she could convincingly lie to Charlotte in a heartbeat, but it’s not worth the effort; either way she’d have to tell her.

“I’m gonna kill my mom,” Lola tells her under her breath, before smiling at the stewardess doing final checks, while Charlotte sits in stunned silence.

“You’re gonna murder her?” Charlotte matches her volume, though her voice is full of disbelieving rage. They haven’t even taken off yet. Lola hums in agreement. “What? Just gonna shoot her in the face? You don’t even have a -”

“A plan? Of course I do. I’m gonna burn her house down. With a flare gun,” Lola fires back easily, before adding, “shooting her is Plan B. Also with a flare gun.”

The flight is only a few hours long, and Charlotte spends it fuming in silence, not wanting to cause a scene on a plane, in the airport, or in the taxi to the hotel. There’s no words for the rage, for the betray, for the being an accessory to murder, and she’d probably fight Lola if the older woman didn’t have biceps the size of a rotisserie chicken.

Lola leaves, claiming to get dinner, and comes back with a greasy burger and a flare gun, and Charlotte wants to cry, wants to scream, wants to believe this is all a bad dream.

“You’re fucking kidding me,” is what she says, and Lola gives a patient smile.

“Charlie, please just remember she set me on fire,” and she puts the flare gun on the bedside table, puts her trash in the bin, and goes to bed.

Maybe Charlotte considers taking the gun and throwing it in the ocean. But she doesn’t. Deep down, she’s pretty sure Lola’s not capable of murder, enough that she leaves the gun there; it’s trust. Lola wouldn’t make her an accessory to murder. Probably.

“You’re only an accessory if you come,” Lola tells her over a room service breakfast, and Charlotte feels like she’s going to be sick, “go sight seeing, meet me at the airport,” she shrugs, “if the cops ask you questions, just play dumb, like you do every time they come looking for Nikki or Tommy.”

“You’re not going through with this -”

“I’ll be done by midnight,” Lola’s not usually so focused and sincere, seemingly trying to ignore Charlotte’s negativity.

“Please, Lols, don’t do this; don’t do something crazy that you’ll regret,” Charlotte almost begs her, and Lola’s teeth stretch into a snarl.

“So I’m only allowed to be crazy when it benefits you, right?” She snaps, finally, and Charlotte swallows hard, eyes going wide in surprise. “Because when we rock up to your cheating ex’s house and I’ve got a baseball bat, you can call me crazy and be proud -”

“I never called you crazy,” Charlotte says through her teeth, completely unprepared to handle Lola, who’s never actually lashed out at her before.

“No, Duff called me a psycho, and you believed him, didn’t you? But I was your psycho, wasn’t I, Miss Lee,” Lola’s voice turned cruel and mocking, “it’s okay if I’m a psycho so long as you can wind me up and point me in the direction of whoever you want fucked up -”

“After fucking everything we’ve been through, you’re gonna accuse me of just using you?”

“No,” Lola said easily, flipping from feral to collected with an almost terrifying speed, “we’re friends, Charlotte, I know this, I just don’t think you’re used to my anger not benefiting you.” Her lips twitch into a cool smile, “I think you forget that we’re very different people, Charlie; before I met you, I was blowing cops to get me and Nikki out of trouble every other week, and all that’s changed is that Nikki has started bribing his way out.” it almost seems like a point of pride, and Charlotte has no fucking idea what to say to that. “But sure, I can be crazy when we’re hurting the boy who broke your little heart,” she coos in a mocking falsetto, before her expression just turns cold, “but when it comes to the woman who abused me during my formative years and set me on fire, sure,” she rolled her eyes, miming screwing a lid on a jar, voice dripping with sarcasm, “I’ll put a lid on it, for your sake.” She spat.

“I’m sorry I don’t want you to commit fucking murder,” Charlotte blurts out, realising far too late that she’s crying, and Lola’s hard resolve instantly crumbles, “I’m sorry if it seems like I’m just, just, just using you for your anger, I didn’t mean to, I’m sorry,” and she’s just crying now, sitting in the hotel with her head in her hands, “obviously I don’t think you’re a psycho.”

“Yes you do,” Lola sighs, but it’s neither angry nor an accusation, its defeat, a label she’s worn for a long time finally spoken by one of the only people she actually respected, “and I am; there’s nothing you can do to help it.”

“Please don’t hurt anyone, Lols, please,” Charlotte begs, and Lola heaves another deep sigh.

“Go home, Charlotte, go back to Razzle and pretend this was all a bad dream; I don’t want you living in my reality. You’re better than that.”

“You shouldn’t live in this reality; Lola, you’re scaring me, I’ve known you for half a decade, and for the first time,” Charlotte snifled, sitting up a little straighter and avoiding Lola’s dark gaze, “I’m fucking terrified, okay? You’ll go to jail for the rest of your life.”

“Small price to pay,” Lola shrugs, and Charlotte’s going from guilty to frustrated fast, but Lola’s voice turns hard, “go home, Charlotte.”

“No.”

“You’re not a felon,” Lola finally snaps, voice flat and angry, “you’re a romantic at heart with terrible taste in friends.” Finally, Lola stands, and Charlotte’s shocked into silence.

“You’re the worst friend I’ve got,” it’s like it’s finally hit her, voice a little breathless, a little disbelieving, and Lola gives a wry smile.

“Now you’re getting it.” And she leaves. In the middle of the day. Leaves Charlotte alone and fragile in the hotel, off to do god knows what, possibly off to commit murder.

Charlotte calls Razzle; she’s never been scared of what Lola’s been capable of, maybe it’s that she’s never really thought Lola could commit murder, but now she’s afraid. The only thing that’s ever terrified Lola was her mother, and now, knowing what she knows, the truth about everything she’s been through, in some twisted way Charlotte can easily see how Lola’s made herself believe that the murder is just. Charlotte’s never known a killer, not really. Razzle reassures her over the phone, tells her that Lola’s just gone to blow off steam but that she’s got a good heart under all of it. She’s motivated by loyalty, not revenge. But then it hits them both; Lola’s mother besmirched her father’s name for years, the first person Lola ever truly loved and looked up to. The only man she’s been even more loyal to than Nikki is her father; and she’d kill for either of them in a heartbeat.

“I need to stop her,” Charlotte’s still got tear tracks drying on her cheeks when she sits bolt upright, phone still to her ear, “do I- should I call the cops?” She asks, and Razzle hesitates. It would be a betrayal that would send Lola spiraling further.

“Go to her, you know you can talk her down; she loves you, she listens to you,” Razzle tells her, and when he says it, so sweet, so gentle, so self assured, she almost believes him, “I love you.”

“I love you too.” She tells him, before sniffling loudly, “wish me luck.” She tells him, feeling far more capable than she had minutes before; Razzle was good like that, was supportive like that, knew just what to say when Charlotte needed to hear it.

Charlotte knows the address that Lola was given, and heads there first, but the street is quiet, the house is quiet, and there were no signs of Lola to be seen. She drives for a bit down the road, heart beating in her throat, anxious and mind jumping to all sorts of terrible conclusions, but there’s no signs of any disturbance. Lola had been on foot, and had left only an hour and a half ago, she couldn’t have gotten far.

At the end of the street, there’s a park, and Charlotte comes to realise that school must be on break, because it’s teaming with parents and children, and she searches, wonders, thinks she sees someone who looks a bit like Lola, but doesn’t stick around to make sure. That woman looks too old to be Lola.

She checks bars and liquor stores and gas stations, and finally has a hit from a cashier who sold her two bottles of vodka, and the gas station attendant who had given her a pack of smokes, despite her having already gone through a quarter of a bottle in the half-mile between stores.

The only thing at the end of this street was a graveyard.

Lola’s wasted, unable to stand, sitting with her back against a faintly worn grave, mumbling to herself.

“How could she do this to us, dad?” Is the first thing Charlotte hears from her, an angry growl. With one hand around the neck of a mostly empty vodka bottle, the other comes to forlornly pet the gravestone. Catching sight of Charlotte out of the corner of her eye, Lola’s entire expression crumbles, and for the first time in their whole sordid history, Charlotte watches Lola begin to cry. Angrily, almost defiantly, she searches her pockets, before pulling out a cigarette, lighting it.

“Dad,” Lola says to no-one in particular, looking out ahead instead of at her best friend, face scrunched with angry tears, “meet Charlotte,” she announces, and Charlotte’s words die in her throat; “Charlotte, meet my dad,” and she nods to the headstone she’s leaning against.

“I thought -” Charlotte tries, but no words come to her.

“We’ve just been catching up,” Lola takes a long drag from the cigarette, coughing when she follows it with a swig of vodka.

“What happened?” Charlotte asks quietly, approaching like Lola was a wild animal. Lola grumbles something unintelligible, mostly under her breath, and Charlotte gingerly sits beside her.

“He was a really, really fucking good man,” Lola murmurs, forlorn, resting her head on Charlotte’s shoulder, startling the younger woman, who wasn’t quite sure how to deal with this situation just yet, “he would have loved them, Motley,” she clarified, and she takes another smoke, “he was always a huge fan of rock, always had the hair to match. Mom would call him a long-haired yahoo but it was never malicious, it just-” she was crying now, and she had to pause, “she would have loved them too, back then, but when he was gone, I think she just started hating everything that reminded her of him.” She pauses, taking another drink, her voice defeated when she finally spoke, “probably why she hated me so much."

Silence, then;

"She has a kid.” Its the most defeated she’s ever sounded. Even Charlotte feels it like a punch to the gut. “She gets to play happy families, and I get to slowly dig myself an early grave,” she finishes her cigarette and immediately lights another.

“Lo, what happened?” Charlotte asked once more, and Lola turns to her, eyes bloodshot and mouth in a thin, unhappy line.

“Nothing.” It sounds like it hurts to admit, “because I’m not a psycho,” she says quietly, “I’m not gonna hurt that kid.”

“Your… sibling?” Charlotte almost winces as she says it, but Lola laughs in an almost disbelieving way, leaning her head back against her father’s gravestone.

“My little brother; Milo, I think. I didn’t stick around long… she doesn’t even know I’m here."

Charlotte wraps her arm around Lola’s shoulder, pulls her in for a hug, and Lola melts into her, lets herself be pulled into hug, her head on Charlotte’s shoulder as she cries unashamedly. They sit on the grave of Lola’s father until it gets dark, wrapped up in each other, giving comfort and getting drunk, and there’s stories spilling from Lola that she’d never told anyone; happy times from before her shit got dark, before her father passed, stories she’d thought she’d forgotten.

"Did you mean what you said?” Charlotte asks finally, voice fragile, vodka burning through her veins, “do you think I have bad taste in friends?” Lola contemplates for a long while before humming.

“I think you deserve better than me. And Nikki. I think you’ve got good friends, Peach and Eileen, they’re good friends,” Lola nods resolutely, “they wouldn’t drag you down to Boston just to argue with you and watch them chicken out on murdering their mom.”

“They don’t wanna murder their mom to begin with,” Charlotte agrees with a half laugh, her arm tucked into Lola’s, resting her cheek on Lola’s shoulder. Lola hums an agreement. Gently, she rests her head against Charlotte’s.

“I’m sorry, Charlie.”

They gaze out into the graveyard, tired, drunk, and world-weary beyond their years. Moments like these are a sharp reminder to Charlotte, of just how terrifying Lola’s world can be, and just how lonely she once was. The way Lola clings to the band, to Charlotte, it very suddenly made clear and perfect sense.

“You’re not the worst friend I’ve got, Lols, not even close; you give a shit when it counts the most. About me, about our band-family; you give so much of a shit you’d kill for us. You’re probably the most loyal person I’ve ever met.” Charlotte tells her honestly, and Lola’s quiet, before sniffling loudly, and laughing.

“Stop it, Miss Lee, I promised Tommy I wouldn’t have a thing for any more of his family,” Lola jokes, but hugs Charlotte tightly as she squawks with horrified amusement.

Its a considerable walk back to the hotel, but as Lola crashes onto the soft mattress of the bed, she feels worlds lighter than when she’d woken up.

#nikki sixx #Tommy Lee #rtp #motley crue #motley crue imagine #the dirt #the dirt imagine #charlotte&lola #the angry lizard writes #lola & charlotte

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