#i like to imagine him silent as the grave but his face make small changes and eyes get wider with every new reveal | Explore Tumblr Posts and Blogs

blushinggray · 2 years

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playboy sero saga cont...

part 2/? (part 1 here)

sero hanta x fem!reader

the aftermath of that night you spent drinking from sero's mouth instead of a cup...

cw // more flirting, implied sexual content

Just to be clear, you did not think about him when you eventually went to bed and got yourself off that night after you left Kaminari's house. You were a little on edge even after your shower and still coming down from your tipsy high, so you were naturally a little friskier than usual. It's totally normal.

But for the sake of your own pride and dignity, you will not confess to your own prosecuting conscience that thoughts of Sero "fuckboy" Hanta's arms or hands or mouth or height or smile or anything of his led you to your orgasm that night. Because they didn't! You swear they didn't.

It was just some generic, practically faceless, hot bodied guy you imagined to get things going. Probably some actor from a movie you watched recently or something. If he also happens to have a similar build, or hair color, or charming personality, or smile as some other guy you happened to make out with earlier that night, then it's just a coincidence.

So no, you did not fucking fantasize about Sero and how strong his hands were on your face or how easily his body slotted against yours despite your clear height difference or how sweet his mouth tasted right before you went to sleep.

...

You did, however, wake up from a dream where those hands were holding onto your waist to keep you in place for him to fuck into you. And you did get yourself off the next morning while those thought clouds were clearing up...

But it's nothing you can't bounce back from! After you get up, you go about your day as usual, putting on as much background noise as possible to keep your thoughts away from him and what you almost did with him last night.

Ashido doesn’t let you get away with it for long, however, because she calls you later in the afternoon to get all the contextual details of what she walked in on the night before. You don’t know whether it’s because she’s been friends with Sero for a while, but she (and Hagakure, who’s with her on the other end of the line) seems pretty eager to get you to change your mind about him.

“Mina, stop!” You eventually have to say, “Look, I have nothing against him or anything. It’s just… I don’t see this turning out well for me, okay? I’ve dated guys like him before — and don’t get me wrong, they’re great, they treat me well and all that. But at the end of the day, it’s not gonna turn into anything serious, and I don’t wanna be caught up in my feelings for a guy who’s probably just trying to have some fun.”

There’s silence from their end for a bit, before Hagakure asks first, “Is that what you think is gonna happen with Sero?”

You’re silent this time for a moment before Ashido says with a small sigh, “Well, it’s not like it’s unwarranted. We’re his friends and even we can’t defend him on that front.”

Hagakure hums in what sounds like confusion but also acknowledgement, like this isn’t where they had planned the conversation to be going. But you’re internally relieved that you didn’t let it go too far last night.

“But!” She continues, “What we can say is that he’s a genuinely good guy. You can trust us on that!”

“Yes, totally! One of the most reliable guys we know!” Hagakure agrees.

“And we’re pretty sure he’s into you. Like, in a more than just a casual, party hookup kinda way.”

The way your heart flips when you hear that that cute, overly playful, yet admittedly cool playboy might be ‘into’ you is downright pathetic. You can already feel your grave getting deeper.

But you try to play it off for a while longer, “Okay… and how exactly is that better?”

“Well… that, we can’t really say. But he was clearly bummed when you left last night.”

“As anyone would be if they suddenly got blueballed…” you point out.

“I heard from Ojiro that Sero originally wasn’t even gonna come last night, but he changed his mind when he heard that your usual group was gonna be there!” Hagakure mentions.

Well, even if that was true, that doesn’t necessarily mean that he came specifically for you… But…

“Look, guys, I don’t know what you’re hoping will come out of this, but just let me figure this out on my own, okay?”

It takes a bit of back and forth, but eventually the topic is put aside, and you end the call a while later after agreeing to grab lunch tomorrow.

You’re expecting to have to fight off the topic of Sero once more when you arrive at the diner the next day, but it turns out it might be much, much harder than that once that tall, dark-haired, smiling charmer slides right into the booth seat across from you.

“Hey,” he greets you with his usual ease, “Fancy seeing you here.”

You’re frozen for a second as you just stare at the very guy you have been trying to avoid both physically and mentally for the past two days. After darting your eyes around the diner to see no one else you recognize, you find your voice again to say, “I’m… waiting for Mina.”

“What a coincidence. So am I.” He leans back against the booth seat, and somehow he’s tall enough to comfortably lay his arm out over the top of the booth behind him. Fuck.

Pulling out his phone, he taps on it to show you his texts with her that are indeed inviting him out to grab lunch at this very same diner without any other pretense.

Oh, Ashido… You little…

“And I have a feeling,” he says, still completely at ease as he takes his phone back, “that we’re gonna get a message soon that she suddenly can’t make it.”

“Don’t even jinx me like that…” you close your eyes with a groan, only to hear your phone vibrate on the table just a few seconds later.

Despite your prayers, Sero turns out to have the gift of prophecy, because there it is; Ashido’s sudden cancellation and apology text.

Sero’s phone dings just seconds later, and he chuckles with an amused, “Ah, there it is.”

You suck in a deep breath through your nose and exhale it as slowly as you can before you start typing back a response:

To: Ashido Mina You meddlesome little CUNT i am CANCELLING our friendship 🔪

After hitting ‘send,’ you grab your things and announce, “I’m leaving.”

“Aww, already?” Sero asks with the same easy smile that hasn’t left his face since he got here, “You don’t wanna join me on this blind date that we were suddenly forced into?”

“Call me crazy.” You shrug with a blameless look as you leave the booth. You mumble a quick apology to the waiter before stepping out of the diner and letting out a deep sigh. Maybe now you’ll be able to think without his confidence and wit and face to distract you.

Except—

“Hey, wait up.” His voice follows behind you as a hand catches your shoulder. A long, slender, yet strong hand that you’re suddenly getting flashback sensations of on your hips and jaw and hair.

“What?”

“You know, there’s actually a Thai place right around the corner from here that’s really good.” He removes his hand to point a thumb down the street, “If you don’t have lunch plans anymore, you wanna join me instead?”

Oh, he’s good… Just rolling with the punches and inviting you out on his own terms instead of Ashido’s… Too good…

You want to refuse, but you really are kind of hungry since you slept through breakfast today, thinking that you’d eat your fill when you met Ashido. And you’re not so proud that you’d run away from a perfect lunch opportunity when you need to eat.

So with a defeated sigh, you gesture for him to start walking, “Lead the way.”

Somehow, in that moment, his smile grows wider. And it looks a little different than usual. It's not like that smile that looks like he’s trying to charm the pants (and/or panties) off of you. You can’t exactly pinpoint how it’s different, but it just… feels like it.

The Thai restaurant is a small mom-and-pop shop with a lot of oriental decor on the walls. Not all of it looks necessarily Thai, but somehow it all still feels kind of tied together.

You order what Sero recommends you, since he’s been here before and seems to have a familiar relationship with the shop owners. But once your orders are in and you’re left to awkwardly sip at your lemon water, it dawns on you that you have no idea what to talk to him about.

You’re rattling your brain for literally any topic on the planet, but he pins you with the exact one you had been both expecting and avoiding with your life.

“So, how’ve you been since the kickback on Friday? I’ve been meaning to get ahold of you.”

“Fine? I guess.” You try not to cough on your water as you set it down, “Nothing I couldn’t get over after a day.”

Except the images my brain conjured up of your hands all over me.

“Oh yeah?” He says, that playful smile returning, “Was I that forgettable? Guess I’m gonna have to do better.”

You have half a mind to either play dumb or play along, but in the end, you know you’ll be playing right into his hands either way. So maybe it’s better that you don’t play at all.

Bringing a hand up to rub at part of your face, you sigh, “Look, I’m sorry about that. Please just forget that that ever happened.”

“Why?” He asks without missing a beat, “I’ve been kinda hoping that would happen sooner or later. Though I gotta say I didn’t expect it to turn out the way it did.”

“Yeah, well that’s as far as it goes for us.” You shut it down as quickly as you can, “I definitely don’t have any plans to do that again with you.”

“Really? None at all?” he hums, still looking way too amused for your comfort.

“None at all.” You repeat, “Nothing personal.”

“That’s a shame.” He says, leaning back like he’s all too used to this initial response. Which you’re sure he is, and has managed to change plenty of people’s minds before… “I was really hoping to get to know you better.”

“You can’t get to know someone without making out with them?” The cheeky response is out of your mouth before you can stop it.

He laughs at that, which suddenly makes you feel a little warmer around the ears. Not good, not good.

“Well, it’s not usually as fun, I’ll tell you that.” He chuckles as he sits up in his chair, leaning forward a little more, “But if you’d prefer it that way, then I don’t mind.”

“I wasn’t planning on hanging out with you either way, to be honest.” You say.

“I’m sure. But you’re here with me right now, aren’t you?” He brings up, which you can’t argue against. “Plans can change. It’s not so bad, is it?”

Before you can answer, your food comes out and it smells incredible enough to distract you from making a snappy comeback. You thank the older woman who serves it to you, and Sero gives her a flirty compliment in thanks as well, which she laughs at and playfully tuts him for.

“Always the sweet talker, you are, Hanta. Eat up, you two.” She returns to the kitchen after patting Sero’s shoulder.

After digging into your first bite, your eyes fall closed as you let out a small groan, “Oh my god…”

“What do you think?”

“It’s so good…” you only say after shoveling several more bites into your mouth.

“Right?” Sero smiles wider.

After you’ve demolished about half of your food, you finally start to slow down to a healthier pace. Enough for you to notice a camera snapping sound coming from across the table. Sure enough, you look up and see that Sero is smiling down at his phone that’s suspiciously angled towards you.

“What the heck was that?” You demand, putting your fork down, “Did you just take a photo of me?”

“I couldn’t help it. You just look so cute stuffing your cheeks with something so delicious.” He chuckles as he turns his phone around to show you the picture he took.

Admittedly, it’s not… totally unflattering. You certainly look like a glutton with the way you're chomping down on more noodles than you can fit into your mouth... But in a way, it could be considered cute, you suppose.

But even so, you’d rather not have photos of yourself saved into Sero’s phone, so you reach for it — only for him to pull it away with another teasing smile on his face.

“Delete it.” You say.

“Why? It’s so cute. I’ll send it to you if you want.”

“I don’t need it. Just get rid of it.”

“Fine, fine.” He says, tapping on his phone before making a dramatic pause, “After I send it to someone.”

“Stop! Oh my god.” You jump from your seat to reach across the table for his phone, which he reels back to avoid just in time.

You keep grabbing at it for a few seconds, looking more and more idiotic the longer it goes on. But eventually he relents and shows you his camera roll that no longer has your face among his photos. So you sink back into your seat with a groan.

You’re not really in the mood to eat anymore, but you can’t just let your plate go unfinished. Though in the chaos of all of that ridiculous photo chasing, your fork must have fallen off of the table, since you find it on the ground after a few seconds of searching.

“I could always birdfeed you the rest if they don't have one.” He offers after you ask the owners for a new fork.

You can’t stop your eyes from rolling. Where does he get the gall to say shit like that at every opportunity he can find?

“Yeah, yeah. I know your game.” You say, picking up your water to both take a drink and hide your face in case you’re making some weird expression, “You and your aphrodisiac spit.”

A raspberry sound escapes his lips before he starts laughing more wholeheartedly, “My what now?”

The owner saves you from answering as she hands you a clean fork, which you thank her for before returning to your food. Though you’re a little self conscious when she lingers for a bit. At first you think it’s because she’s watching you eat and waiting for your reaction, but then you see her eyeing Sero — who’s still laughing — with an amused but intrigued kind of look. Like she hasn’t seen him act like this before.

She returns to the kitchen as Sero finally calms down enough to finish his own food too. “You always surprise me in some way. I like that about you.”

“You say that now.” You playfully warn him, “You haven’t known me for that long.”

“Well, maybe I’ll get to change that soon.”

The words themselves sound ominous, but the way he says it as he looks at you with such casual interest makes it feel like something to almost look forward to.

Almost.

You do eventually part ways after leaving the restaurant, where Sero paid for both of your meals by pretending to go to the bathroom first. You had hoped to pay him back or at least get rid of your debt today by treating him to a drink or dessert, so you wouldn’t have to worry about making a promise for next time and agonizing over it in your head until then, but he sends you off without pressure for any such promises.

“But hey, if your ‘plans’ ever change, lemme know.” He says after walking you to the station.

A scoffing sounds escapes your mouth before you can stop yourself again, but you quickly turn tail and walk towards the station, “Ya. You’ll be first to know.” You wave without looking back.

“Bye, [Name].” He calls from behind you in a more… soft voice than you were expecting. There isn’t the usual playful charm that he uses on everyone, middle-aged restaurant owners or otherwise. It surprises you enough to pause on your way up the stairs.

So you turn back, leaving him with just one last grace, “Thanks for lunch, Sero.”

It’s only there for a second before you turn away, but there it is again. That strange, slightly different smile. The one whose intention you can’t exactly pinpoint.

Or if it even has any intention behind it at all.

You sigh as you wonder if it’s already too late for you if you’re already thinking this much about it. About him. When you think back and just replay the way he laughed and smiled at you, it makes your body react in a different way than when he grabbed and held you for a kiss. It still makes you warm but… differently.

Though you have yet to commit to the idea that it’s a bad thing.

—

From: Ashido Mina i'm sowwwwyyyy pls forgive me i'm just a lil cupid in training 🥺👉👈 i just thought u guys would be cute together and stuff don't be too mad plsssss 😩🙏🙏🙏

...

OKAY EXCUSE ME???!?!?? [photo] WHAT IS THE MEANING OF THIS YOU HUNG OUT WITH HIM AFTER ALL??!?!

hello?!?!?!? tell me everything!!!!!!!!!!! 😆💕💓🖤💖🤍

—

tbc

part 3

#sero hanta x reader #sero hanta #bnha x reader #drabble #me these days: ah what a beautiful day to ignore all my actual wips and projects for this spontaneous unplanned fuckboi sero universe #i was planning to just write some hanky panky in this part and move on with my life but alas i cannot escape my slow burn nature #nor can i stop my personal need for excessive flirting and hint dropping #mine #some beta

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misirosekisiro · 6 months

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The Silent Killer 5

Chapter 5

A serene morning dawns, bathed in golden sunshine streaming through the partially opened curtains. Birdsong drifts lazily through the open window, melding seamlessly with the rustle of leaves outside. Within the tranquility of this unassuming neighborhood, danger quietly lurks nearby.

Jason awakens early, stretching languidly. Groggy memories resurface of last night’s intimacies, causing his cheeks to flush in embarrassment.

He glances at Dylan, whose composure appears undisturbed despite having slept soundly through their late-night exchange. How much did Dylan really hear during their conversation? Did he acknowledge his fears about potential involvement in those ghastly incidents? Would their relationship survive such accusations? Questions whirl like hurricanes in his mind, threatening to consume him.

The house creaks softly, settling itself into the lazy morning routine. Sunlight trickles through cracks in the wooden shutters, illuminating dust particles suspended mid-air. 

Drifting on the breeze, laughter erupts from children at play outside. Yet behind closed doors, darkness prevails within the confines of this seemingly idyllic home.  

Jason emerges from the bathroom, dressed casually in loose denim shorts and a worn tank top. His tousled hair frames his pale complexion, giving off an air of innocence which contrasts starkly with his troubled expressions.

Dylan lies motionless in bed, lost in thought.

Recollections of his past flitter through his mind, casting shadows on the present moment. Unconsciously, his fingers caress the scar on his left cheek, the memory of a childhood accident revisited once more.

Once in a while, he will recall about his past, his real past. A first time that he move to other skin. That feeling never fade form his memory. How enjoy, excite, like have a best sex. His heart beat faster. Gaze at Jason. How i feel when i live in his skin? His cock rock hard just when he imagine about that.

Soon his erection starts growing, showing strong desire, throbbing insistently, yearning for satisfaction. Dylan rolls slowly onto his side, letting out a deep, audible sigh. Glancing over at Jason, a longing expression flashes briefly across his face, quickly masked by a neutral smile. “Breakfast?” he inquires, breaking the silence.

Jason jumps slightly, surprised by the sudden change in topic.

"Oh yes, breakfast sounds great!" Dylan smirks, rising gracefully from the bed. Both of them share a knowing glance, recognizing the importance of maintaining a normal appearance amidst these peculiar circumstances.

Dylan heads towards the kitchen area, navigating expertly through the clutter. Meanwhile, Jason retrieves clean dishes from the cupboard, attempting to make their small space appear organized. Engrossed in the task, they continue discussing inconsequential matters - recipes, weather forecasts, and recent events in town.

Their voices intertwined, creating a harmonious symphony punctuated occasionally by moments of awkward silence. Despite these attempts at levity, an undertone of unease hangs heavy in the air, palpable to both participants.

A week pass aways, since Dylan come to live with Jason. During this time he study his prey 

closer, learning his habits, his routines, making mental notes. In his head, planning meticulous strategies for his killing sprees.

Dylan had noticed that Jason often went running along the riverbanks in the mornings. It struck him as odd that nobody else appeared to frequent that route—a perfect opportunity for isolation and privacy. He planned to ambush Jason there, take control of his life completely.

This was going to be his greatest triumph yet — another victim added to his collection, bringing him closer to achieving ultimate power.

In the meantime, Jason prepared dinner for the two of them. He felt guilty, however, for involving Dylan in his daily routine, potentially putting him in grave danger. Nonetheless, Jason believed strongly in their connection and felt compelled to carry on as usual, hoping for the best outcome possible.

Recently Jason notice that Dylan gaze to him more often

then usually. Those look filled with some kind of curiosity, desire, excitement and mixed feelings. They send chills down his spine, leaving him wondering what exactly is happening inside Dylan's head. Are those looks merely an indication of admiration or does it conceal deeper desires that Jason cannot fathom?

A day pass, Dylan decide that he ready to replace Jason. He know that Jason feel something not right recently but it's too late for him. Dylan grin.

Smile, broad and confident. Today would be the day he finally claimed victory. The plan had consumed his every waking hour; nothing could stand in his way now. Even as doubt began to stir within him, he silenced the whispers, reminding himself of his singular objective. This was no game; lives hung precariously in the balance. 

He wait until Jason do his routine went running along the riverbanks. He wait then stalk Jason quietly.

Slipping into the bushes near the riverside path where he knows Jason would soon approach. Each step carefully placed among the dry leaves, each breath drawn shallow to avoid detection. Closer, closer he moves toward his quarry. Every nerve alert, adrenaline coursing through his veins as anticipation mounts. Finally, he sees Jason approaching. The moment he had been waiting for has arrived.

The birds cease their melodies, replaced instead by the pounding rhythm of his own pulse, thundering furiously against his eardrums.

Adrenaline surged through his veins, a potent elixir fueling his determination.

As Dylan drew closer, Jason continued oblivious to the threat looming overhead. His pace remained steady, unwavering in the midst of imminent peril. He sensed something amiss, though his instincts failed to identify the precise nature of the danger lingering in the vicinity.

Stealthily, Dylan creeps closer, calculating distances, angles, trajectory of flight.

Time slows almost imperceptibly as he draws nearer, the world reduced to a single point of focus: his prize. Suddenly, as if propelled by a hidden force, Dylan leaps into action, closing the gap separating them swiftly and effortlessly. Jason, caught entirely off-guard, can only watch helplessly as his fate plays out before him. 

Dylan lunges towards Jason with superhuman speed, pinning him against the tree trunk with surprising strength.

Panicked, Jason struggles to break free from his assailant's grip, adrenaline racing through his veins. Sweat drips down his brow, mixing with cold terror etched upon his features. The eerie calmness of the surroundings only heightened the intensity of the situation, amplifying every heartbeat reverberating through his body.

An ominous silence envelops the woodland glade as Jason tries fruitlessly to escape his captor.

Beads of sweat trickle down his forehead, adding an additional layer of perspiration to his already frazzled state. With each passing second, panic intensifies, constricting his throat and sending waves of apprehension crashing through his core. "Why?" he utters weakly, pleading for understanding or reason behind this violent assault. However, his question goes unanswered, echoing back into the surrounding foliage with a disconcerting resonance.

Dylan studies Jason closely, taking note of his every twitch and tremble.

His grip tightens around Jason's slender neck, leaving no room for escape. A predatory grin spreads across his lips, signaling a mix of pleasure and anticipation. Silence fills the space between them, the stillness accentuated by the subtle rustlings of nearby wildlife. Time seems to crawl forward at a snail's pace, dragging each fleeting moment further into the abyss of uncertainty.

Jason gasps for air, struggling to stay conscious under the weight of Dylan's relentless hold. But only get harder press grip around his neck.

Tighten till barely able breathe. Jason try fight against him, push him away. Dylan smile wider. More pleased than ever. Like watching how he manipulate him, take total control of his destiny. No matter how much Jason resist, Dylan's superior strength proves undeniably overwhelming.

Desire consumes Dylan, engulfing him whole. All thoughts of the past dissipate in the heat of the moment, swept aside by the urgency of claiming his prize. His hands grip tight and tigher on his trophie of victory. 

Jason's body shake for a last time. as last breath was sip aways.

Jason struggle ceased, giving up hope as darkness descended upon him. Dylan watched intently, marveling at the sheer power he held over another human being. Life slipped away so easily, yet it required such careful precision to exact revenge upon the living. And there was no greater rush than witnessing someone's final moments unfold at your hand. The sweet taste of vengeance danced seductively on his tongue, teasing his senses with the promise of absolute domination.

As the light drained from Jason's limbs, a cruel sense of accomplishment swelled within Dylan. He knew that with each soul he claimed, he gained more power, solidifying his position as the most feared entity within this sleepy little town. His heart raced as he contemplated his next move, eager to strike once more, ensuring his reign as the unseen predator forever entrenched in local mythology.

Emboldened by his latest success, Dylan took solace in the knowledge that his presence would leave a permanent mark on everyone who crossed paths with him.

He stood tall above the lifeless form of Jason, feeling empowered by the magnitude of his actions. The screams of fear that had once plagued him were long gone, replaced by the serene certainty that came with mastering his inner demons. He had conquered the very essence of chaos, allowing him to see through the masks worn by society's weaker members.

Wandering aimlessly around town after disposing of Jason's corpse, Dylan couldn't help but wonder which unsuspecting individual would become his next plaything.

Unlike the other towns, people here didn't seem to pay any attention to their neighbors. Perfect for hiding in plain sight – he thought to himself with a malicious smirk.

After all, who would suspect a quiet, introverted neighbor like Jason? He not even have closest friends to suspected anything unusual about him. 

With Jason dead, Dylan decided to assume his identity fully. He entered Jason's apartment, methodically changing clothes, cutting his hair to match Jason's style, and even adjusting his posture to mirror Jason's mannerisms.

"Who am I today?" he whispered softly to himself, savoring the idea of becoming someone else. He found great satisfaction in deceiving others, playing games with their minds. It made him feel powerful, invincible - a god among mortals.

Over the following weeks, Dylan became increasingly comfortable in his new role as Jason. He started attending social gatherings, joining clubs, and getting involved in various organizations that Jason used to participate in.

Over time, Dylan got better at impersonating Jason's persona, honing his skills in mimicking behaviors and speech patterns.

He slowly ingratiated himself with different groups of individuals, finding comfort in the anonymity provided by adopting someone else's life. People saw a familiar face, trusted it implicitly due to the shared history they believed existed between themselves and 'Jason'.

Little did they realize, however, that the smiling, friendly man greeting them each morning was merely a clever facade orchestrated by the malevolent figure known as 'the Killer.' Unknowingly drawn into his web of deceit, these innocents fell victim to the cunning mastermind who played upon their naivety and desire for camaraderie. In doing so, New Jason managed to maintain his guise perfectly, expertly concealing the true extent of his intentions beneath layers of charm and benevolence.

It wasn't hard for him, having spent years perfecting the art of deception and manipulation. To the rest of the townspeople, New Jason appeared nothing short of the epitome of normalcy—a dutiful citizen with a passion for charitable work and genuine concern for those less fortunate. Little did they know, this façade served a far deeper purpose than mere appearances alone.

Underneath the surface of his pristine image lay the mind of a psychopath, driven by the need to hunt and consume lives for sustenance.

Jason feel so comfort in this skin. He found to be an artist is quite fit him. He paint his lust, excitment, hunger to the canvas. They sell quickly at galleries around town. Everyone admired them, praised his unique talent. Even some high profile clients order custom pieces.

New Jason had come to appreciate the simple beauty inherent in the town's tranquility. After all, what could possibly go wrong when surrounded by such idyllic scenery? Its inhabitants seemed content, going about their daily routines without ever suspecting the horrors that lie beneath the surface.

For months, New Jason thrived in his newfound existence, reveling in the opportunities presented by his anonymity. He continued to excel in his chosen profession, earning respect and admiration from colleagues and customers alike. However, as time went on, something began to shift inside him. Deep within his soul, a fierce yearning grew stronger with each passing day.

A voice echoed within his head, tempting him with images of bloodied knuckles clutching fragile necks, whispering of power beyond measure. The pull toward destruction became impossible to ignore.

His gaze drifted casually toward a passerby, calculating the potential outcome of his voracious desires. Despite his outward appearance of amiability, deep within lies a ferociously hungry monster aching for release.

He know it's like a loop, that he can't even exit. The time that this life is can't contain himself anymore. They seeking for new one, new hunt. 

"Time for move, i guess" 

Jason say while packing his things, preparing to leave the town. He doesn't want to stay here longer, afraid he might lose his nerve, unable to continue playing his part. This place brought him too many memories of old times. Times when he was not like this. Not a predator, nor a serial killer. Just a regular man trying to make ends meet. Those days felt like a lifetime ago. Now, he's consumed by the need to devour everything in his path.

The decision to relocate comes naturally to Jason.

Having established his reputation locally, it's easier to fade back into obscurity elsewhere. Before leaving, though, he must attend to several remaining matters—such as closing accounts and settling debts. While dealing with these administrative tasks, he finds himself constantly glancing outside, where sunlight casts elongated shadows across the street. His eye lingers on the motionless silhouettes, almost as if daring them to stand up and confront him.

Once everything's been taken care of, Jason loads his belongings into a van parked discreetly behind his building.

Closing the door, he starts the engine and eases the vehicle onto the bustling roadway. With his heart racing, he anticipates the adventure awaiting him at his destination, which even he don't know where it will be. He just drive town by town, and keep looking. He not rush anyways

This journey will take as much time as needed, until he find the right place, the perfect stage for his grand return. The right spot where his predatory instincts would finally be set free.

The world seems smaller, closer now as he drives further away from home. There's a new excitement brewing within him, an awakening force urging him forward. He knows that somewhere out there, waiting patiently, lies a fresh pool of potential victims ripe for the taking.

#identity theft #steal clothes #stolen identity #clothes stolen #gay

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autolovecraft · 6 months

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You kicked hard, for Asaph's coffin was on the floor.

I believe his eye-for-an-eye fury could beat old Father Death himself.

You kicked hard, for Asaph's coffin was on the floor. It was just as he had recognized old Matt's coffin that the door slammed to in the wind, leaving him in a dusk even deeper than before. The undertaker grew doubly lethargic in the bitter weather, and seemed to outdo even himself in carelessness. The light was dim, but Birch's sight was good, and he vaguely wished it would stop.

He was curiously unelated over his impending escape, and almost dreaded the exertion, for his form had the indolent stoutness of early middle age.

Davis died.

Certainly, the events of that evening greatly changed George Birch. Would the firm Fenner casket have caved in so readily? On the afternoon of Friday, April 15th, then, Birch set out for the tomb with horse and wagon to transfer the body of Matthew Fenner. The light was dim, but Birch's sight was good, and he planned to save the rejected specimen, and to let no other doctor treat the wounds. It was just as he had recognized old Matt's coffin that the door slammed to in the wind, leaving him in a dusk even deeper than before. In this twilight too, he began to realize the truth and to shout loudly as if his horse outside could do more than neigh an unsympathetic reply. Fortunately the village was small and the death rate low, so that the narrow ventilation funnel in the top ran through several feet of earth, making this direction utterly useless to consider. Neither did his old physician Dr. Davis, who died years ago. I still think he was not an evil man.

The tower at length finished, and his body responding with that maddening slowness from which one suffers when chased by the phantoms of nightmare. At last the spring thaw came, and graves were laboriously prepared for the nine silent harvests of the grim reaper which waited in the tomb, and the overhead ventilation funnel virtually none at all; so that he was reduced to a profane fumbling as he made his halting way among the long boxes toward the latch. The wounds—for both ankles were frightfully lacerated about the Achilles' tendons—seemed to puzzle the old physician greatly, and finally almost to frighten him.

The body was pretty badly gone, but if ever I saw vindictiveness on any face—or former face.

He was a bachelor, wholly without relatives.

He was curiously unelated over his impending escape, and almost dreaded the exertion, for his form had the indolent stoutness of early middle age. The moon was shining on the scattered brick fragments and marred facade, and the source of a task whose performance deserved every possible stimulus. That he was not perfectly sober, he subsequently admitted; though he had not then taken to the wholesale drinking by which he later tried to forget certain things. Certainly, the events of that evening greatly changed George Birch. Several of the coffins began to split under the stress of handling, and he vaguely wished it would stop. Davis. As he remounted the splitting coffins he felt his weight very poignantly; especially when, upon reaching the topmost one, he heard that aggravated crackle which bespeaks the wholesale rending of wood. You kicked hard, for Asaph's coffin was on the floor. He was merely crass of fiber and function—thoughtless, careless, and liquorish, as his easily avoidable accident proves, and without that modicum of imagination which holds the average citizen within certain limits fixed by taste. Over the door, however, the high, slit-like transom in the brick facade gave promise of possible enlargement to a diligent worker; hence upon this his eyes long rested as he racked his brains for means to reach it.

Birch decided that he would begin the next day with little old Matthew Fenner, whose grave was also near by; but actually postponed the matter for three days, not getting to work till Good Friday, the 15th. As he planned, he could not but wish that the units of his contemplated staircase had been more securely made.

The practices I heard attributed to him would be unbelievable today, at least to such meager tools and under such tenebrous conditions as these, Birch glanced about for other possible points of escape. His day's work was sadly interrupted, and unless chance presently brought some rambler hither, he might have to remain all night or longer. It was Asaph's coffin, Birch, but you got what you deserved. In this funereal twilight he rattled the rusty handles, pushed at the iron panels, and wondered why the massive portal had grown so suddenly recalcitrant. The afflicted man was fully conscious, but would say nothing of any consequence; merely muttering such things as Oh, my ankles! In the semi-gloom he trusted mostly to touch to select the right one, and indeed came upon it almost by accident, since it tumbled into his hands as if through some odd volition after he had unwittingly placed it beside another on the third layer.

Three coffin-heights, he reckoned, would permit him to reach the transom; but gathered his energies for a determined try. Davis, who died years ago. At any rate he kicked and squirmed frantically and automatically whilst his consciousness was almost eclipsed in a half-swoon. Just where to begin Birch's story I can hardly decide, since I am no practiced teller of tales. I've seen sights before, but there was one thing too much here. Armington, the lodge-keeper, answered his feeble clawing at the door. An eye for an eye! The undertaker grew doubly lethargic in the bitter weather, and seemed to outdo even himself in carelessness. In this funereal twilight he rattled the rusty handles, pushed at the iron panels, and wondered why the massive portal had grown so suddenly recalcitrant. That was Darius Peck, the nonagenarian, whose grave was not far from the daily paths of men was enough to exasperate him thoroughly. He had not forgotten the criticism aroused when Hannah Bixby's relatives, wishing to transport her body to the cemetery in the city whither they had moved, found the casket of Judge Capwell beneath her headstone.

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marvelsbanner · 3 years

Text

Part of a Team

Summary: Wanda is the newest Avengers recruit and she’s having a hard time finding her place in this new life- maybe she can find it in you?

Pairing: Wanda Maximoff x y/n, you

Warnings: Brief mention of death and blood, minor language (if you squint theres kind of compromising situations? nothing outright sexual)

Word Count: ~2700

A/N: Reblogs, likes, and comments are VERY much appreciated, all mistakes are my own! xx

**I don't own marvel and if I did Natasha would be alive**

Something was wrong. You were just in Strucker’s lab- just on the trail of one of the enhanced twins. The alarms were going off around you and your boots clanged on the metal floor- before you froze in your place, a red haze overtaking you and suddenly you were thrown into the daylight.

You felt tingles run through your veins and down your spine; your head throbbed. You felt vulnerable, seen. What the hell is going on-

You’re in the forest, you think. No- there are rocks. Big rocks-

Focus.

No, not rocks. Graves. Gravestones. Where the hell are you?

You drag your heavy feet over to the nearest, it takes a moment for your vision to focus.

Who’s grave? Who’s grave? Oh god. No no no- this, this can’t be-

Natasha Romanoff.

You felt like throwing up. This couldn’t be real. You dragged yourself to another stone situated nearby: Clint Barton. Beloved husband, father, and friend.

It felt like you couldn't breathe, you were just there with them. You were just there.

Your body jerks as cold hands grab your shoulders and spin your body to face them-

Steve.

You throw your arms around his neck, “STEVE! Oh god Steve! You’re okay- you’re.. cold” you feel something wet and sticky on your hand, pulling it back and seeing red. So much red.

“Steve..” you quickly stumble back, tripping in the process. It’s then you see- it’s too late. His body was grey and lifeless. He falls onto his knees and then collapses totally. You scream and scramble backwards, head hitting another gravestone in the process.

You turn to face it, to read another name of one of the team members you’ve come to call family- but it's not one of theirs. It’s yours.

It’s your name. A graveyard for the Avengers, Earth’s mightiest heroes.

Suddenly your body jolts and you take a sharp intake of breath- your ears are pounding. Everything hurts. But you see her- the enhanced. She’s looking at you with a look you can’t describe. It’s not fear, it’s not anger.. Pity? Empathy? You can’t look away from her, the glowing red eyes capturing you as their prey.

And then there was black.

A few weeks later and you’re back at the tower. Things have changed- the entire world has changed, really. The battle opened up new doors- literal new doors to new realms- that the world had previously thought impossible.

The team had expanded, with Steve’s friend Sam joining the team, as well as Vision, the synthezoid that helped the team to defeat Ultron.

There was also her.

Wanda Maximoff was one of the enhanced twins from Strucker’s experiments, you eventually learned. It was voluntary, but after learning about her backstory you think you would have done the same in her place.

She lost her brother- Pietro- in the battle and she took it hard. She didn’t come out of her room when she could help it. Clint was rather protective over her, maybe it was the fatherly figure coming out of him- maybe he was feeling guilt over being the one Pietro sacrificed himself to save. Either way, he was able to get her out of the room a few times and get her to eat. Vision also struck up a strange friendship with the girl- but then again, Vision was easy company, and rather empathetic for a synthezoid.

Everybody took a hit from when Wanda messed with their heads, some more than others.

You didn’t talk for a week.

Didn’t even talk with Clint’s kids when they wanted to play with you.

You didn’t hold it against her. She proved what a valuable asset she was to the team as she fought alongside the group. She did what she thought was right at the time, and that’s not something you could hold against anybody.

Ever since the Battle, Wanda has been staying in the Avengers facilities with the rest of the group, an official Avenger, but you could tell she was still uneasy around the team. She only talked when she was directly talked to and didn't come out of her room but for a few times a day for food and training, sometimes not even then.

And then there was you.

She seemed to avoid you like the plague. You weren’t even sure you two made eye contact for the entire first few weeks she was there.

At first you thought she just didn’t like you, that something about you rubbed her the wrong way, or something you had done had offended her.

But it was her eyes that gave it away- the same soft look that she gave you right after exploring the deepest and darkest parts of your mind that day at Strucker’s lab. She knew from the second it happened that she had hit a deep nerve, and she would continue to give you that damn look every time she thought you didn't notice her.

But you always did.

You couldn’t help it, the way you were drawn to her. She reminded you so much of yourself before joining the team, broken, and alone in your head. You wanted to know her. You wanted to be there for her, be someone to her, you didn’t want her to keep walking on eggshells around you.

And so, you told her.

You found her in the kitchen late one night. She was wearing flannel pajama bottoms and a garnet tank top with a plain gray robe overtop. Her hair was a mess, roughly shoved into a ponytail and her hands were cupped around a mug. She was blowing on what looked to be dandelion tea, and as you got closer the fragrant earthy smell confirmed your suspicions.

She looked adorable.

And slightly startled to find you alone with her.

“Evening” you said as a greeting as you made your way to the counter top.

She gave a tight-lipped half smile with a timid “Hi” before going back to blowing on her tea. She made a slight movement that looked like she was going to try to slip away before you continued,

“You did really well in training the other day. Cap can’t give you enough praise” you say, taking a seat on one of the counter barstools.

She looks puzzled for a moment over your attempt at small talk before getting out a “Thank you.”

You both stood there in silence for a moment, just looking at each other, feeling the air grow thicker with each second ticking by.

“I like the pajamas” you say with a small smirk. You yourself were still dressed for the day in your leather jacket and black jeans. You could have sworn you saw flush creep up her neck before she swallowed it down with a sip of her tea.

There was another silent moment as she gave you a quizzical look, “I don’t quite understand what’s happening here.” She says with a vague hand gesture to the space between them.

You gave a slight chuckle, it was very on-brand for Wanda to be straight to the point.

“Look, Wanda,” You rotated your body on the stool to face her more comfortably,

“I see the way you look at me when you think i’m not looking. You avoid me at any given opportunity, I actually think this has been the most words we’ve exchanged in your whole time living here.”

She raised her ducked head to look you in the eyes and gave a small shake to her head, “I don’t understand.”

You don’t break eye contact, but simply offer a small smile as you reply “I’m not afraid of you, Wanda. And I don’t hold anything from that day against you. All is forgiven, and I would like to move past that. I understand you believed everything you were doing was for the right reasons, and the only thing that it shows me is your dedication and loyalty to a greater cause. Even if it was the wrong one at the time.”

She looked shocked, to say the least. Her mouth slightly opening and closing as she pondered what to say in response.

“You all should be afraid of me. You see the chaos I’ve created and you think you know what I can do,” her voice caught before she continued, “But the truth is I don't even know what i'm capable of. I don’t belong here.” she says softly.

You give a sad smile before slipping off of the stool and moving closer to her.

“We all thought that, at one point or another. We’ve got a whole freak circus here, we’ve got more baggage than Delta flies in a year- that's, that's uh, an airline. My bad.” You elaborate after she gives you a puzzled look, holding back a smile at your stuttered explanation.

“Aaand I ruined the moment.” You give a small chuckle, before continuing “But my point still stands. Nobody belongs here more or less than anyone else. We’re all just here, that's the truth of the matter. We’re just a bunch of unlucky misfits trying to figure out how to work as a team. Just give it a try, and maybe you’ll find you fit in better than you imagined you would.”

At some point during your speech you had moved close enough to take her hand, and you look down at it now, blushing before going to move it away.

Before you could, she gives your hand a squeeze before moving in to place a gentle kiss against your cheek.

“Thank you, y/n.”

And with that she slips away to her room, leaving you alone with your racing heart and her lukewarm mug of tea.

The next morning you found yourself awake bright and early for another morning training session with Nat and Steve- but you had a guest this time.

“Wanda” you greeted, which she returned with a timid “Good morning.”

“I’m glad you could make it” you say, sincerely.

“I decided to take your advice.” She replies with the smallest smile pulling at her lips.

The two of you stood there for a moment, just taking each other in before Steve cleared his throat, “Alright, we should get started then. Wanda, I'll spar with you to start. Nat, you take y/n. Try not to kill each other, please.” He said with a humored smile.

You make your way towards the corner with Nat on your heels. She gives you a quizzical look with a raised brow, glancing between you and Wanda. You roll your eyes and shake your head, only responding with a pointed “Later,” before your legs sweep under hers and an arm wraps around her torso, flipping you both to the ground and landing with you on top of her.

“Using my own move against me, that’s a low blow y/n.” You both laugh, and you barely respond with a “I learned from the best” before she wraps a leg around your waist and grabs your wrists with one hand, flipping you over and pinning you to the ground. She winks and replies “Damn right you did.”

It went like that for another half an hour, the two of you going back and forth battling for the upper hand. Natasha was the one who had trained you since the beginning, and you could almost say you were near her equal now. Well, you could at least give her a run for her money in a spar.

The two of you were panting and glistening with sweat, cheeks flushed from the exercise when she gave you a mischievous wink and called out to the other two, “Hey grandpa, I think I’m done getting my ass kicked by y/n for the day. I want someone easy, come spar with me”

If looks could kill, the look you were giving her would have the assassin dead on the floor.

Steve only looked amused, grabbing a towel to wipe his own sweat as he responded “Bring it on, Romanoff. Try not to break anything, though. I’ve been told they want my bones for the Smithsonian” Nat rolled her eyes and gave a pointedly fake laugh before they made their way to the other side of the gym, leaving you and Wanda alone.

“Hi” you greeted. She responded with a small smile and a “Hi” in return.

She looked as though she were still catching her breath, the rise and fall of her chest was noticeably fast and her face was still adorned with a glisten of sweat and pretty pink flush.

The same flush you saw from her last night, standing in the kitchen with the dim light around her.

Oh God you were in deep now.

“Nat and I were just wrestling around, hand to hand combat kind of stuff, but I see you and Steve were boxing so it's up to you what you’d like to do.” you say quickly.

“Well.. I do have this,” She waves her hand to show her flicker of red powers “for missions, so I don’t think I really need that kind of training.” She says with a smirk, “But I admit, you seem like a good teacher. Maybe.. some basics?”

She was pushing it. Pushing at this, the same way you were pushing last night. Alright, maybe you could run with this.

You give her a teasing smile, “Alright then. We’ll start slowly. May I?” You ask, reaching out for her, but not quite touching.

“By all means” she says, and you can feel the familiar flush creeping up your neck again. You release a puff of breath and shake yourself out of your thoughts before stepping closer to Wanda, and in one fluid motion you had one leg behind hers, your left arm resting against her upper chest and your other at the small of her back, pushing her flush against yourself.

You could hear the small gasp she let out, smirking to yourself.

“This is a simple take down, easy to get out of, but good for beginning. Now i'm just gonna pull you down as slowly as I can-”

You bring her left leg out from under her and carefully let the two of you sink to the floor, leaving you straddled on top of her and pinning her arms to the ground. The air suddenly felt a lot warmer.

You meet her eyes, breath hitching as you feel her pulse quicken beneath your touch.

You clear your throat and begin again, “Like I said before, it’s easy to get out of, but you want to keep the element of surprise. Use your opponent's body weight against them, if you can twist your wrist to slip it out of their grip and use your hips to to flip-”

Before you could even finish she had you pinned beneath her, wind knocked out of you from the impact.

“Like that?” she said, looking down at you through hooded eyes, thick accent teasing- flirting?

You were suddenly very aware of your close proximity and compromising position- flush against each other with her hips straddling your waist; close enough to feel her rapid heartbeat.

“Yeah- that was- that was good” you sputtered out, barely able to hear yourself over the rapid beating of your own heart. Or maybe it was hers- you aren't sure you could tell the difference between up and down right now.

She gave a proud smirk and opened her mouth to say something before a certain synthezoid floated through the gym walls, clueless to the moment he was interrupting.

“Mr. Stark requests a team meeting and would like you to meet him in the conference room.” He said simply before turning and leaving through the wall again.

Wanda gave you a look that seemed to say we’ll finish this later and moved off of you. You missed the heat of her body immediately.

She offered you a hand up and you gladly took it, the two of you walking side by side in silence to the meeting, shoulders bumping and small smiles shared between you two as you think to yourself that maybe you could get used to this.

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thewildwaffle · 3 years

Text

Humans are Weird - Helium

It's been a while since I got a new story up. I'd been working on some other projects, then had some pretty unhappy life events happen. I am doing fine, so don't worry. Hopefully, now my muse is back and will stick around a while :)

This story is from a prompt ao3

*** *** ***

When you bring together a wide variety of races from different planets and environments, you tend to have an equally wide variety of needs that need to be met from species to species. Ships were typically staffed by a food and nutrients safety team. Custodial teams were careful about residual chemical and oil cross-contamination between particular races. Sections of hab suites had controlled ventilation systems that could be set to various atmospheric needs. Outside the hab suites, at work stations or in communal areas, some species have to be fitted with atmospheric filters. Over the years, these devices have gotten less uncomfortable, thankfully. They weren’t the best, they were a bit bulky, noisy, and in some cases obstructive to the wearer, but hey, being able to properly breathe on a ship with beings who had different atmospheric needs than you was more important than comfort. When the humans joined the galactic community, the newer filters started becoming noticeably smaller and less obtrusive. Many were concerned that the changes would make them less effective, but leave it to the humans to tinker around and invent the impossible when they really wanted to. The latest models were supposed to be so small and comfortable, you could sleep with them on. Heck for some races, you could barely tell they were wearing an atmospheric filter at all. Not only that, they were up to 40% more effective at filtration and gas delivery for many species. This opened up crew rosters for ships. Species who couldn't reasonably be stationed in the same ship due to the gases they breathe being dangerous to others, or vice versa could now be on the same crew.

That included duibs like Marvi who breathe large amounts of helium. She’d been serving aboard Galactic Coalition ships for more standard solar rotations than many of her fellow crewmates had been alive. It helped that duibs were long-lived, of course, and in her time, she’d seen many new technologies come and go. If you pressed her hard enough, she’d likely say that the atmospheric filters the humans developed were by far her favorite. Being able to safely and comfortably pass through different atmospheric biomes was an important ability when you had a long list of custodial and maintenance duties each rotation. Marvi huffed a deep sigh as she rounded another corner. Lighting beam replacements weren’t heavy, but maneuvering them around corners like this was a bit of a pain. “Need a helping paw Marvi?” Marvi turned to see a dark gray priso steadying the end lighting beam she was carrying. The furry face was relatively expressionless, but a clear look at his flicking whiskers and triangular, alert ears and bright eyes told her that he was holding back laughter. He must have just come up from around the other corner and seen the small duib struggling. “Oh, hello Aurrin. I definitely would appreciate some aid, though I would understand if you are busy right now,” Marvi replied politely. Honestly, the help would be very nice and she hoped the offer was serious. “I’m waiting for Human Karl, I can help until he gets here,” Aurrin rose to his back paws awkwardly and grabbed the ends of the light beams in his dexterous front paws. Priso were normally quadrupedal on flat ground, but the forested terrains of their homeworld meant they were at least somewhat adept at grabbing and climbing. He followed along, holding on to the light beams and kept them away from the walls and corners as the pair walked. “I was actually just installing something by the hab suites over there,” he tilted his head back to gesture behind them, “I’ve got something I wanted to test before I go off duty. After that, I’m looking forward to two whole cycles of rest and whatever I want to do.” The corridor here was darker and Marvi stopped walking. This was where she needed to replace the light beam. “Two whole cycles, huh?” She set down the light beam carefully, Aurrin following suit. She pulled out a tool from her hip pack and started working on opening the control panel. In order to open the panels to install the new light beams, she had to make sure power was redirected for safety. “What are you going to do with your time off? Any fun plans?” “A few plans. They might change depending on how my experiment goes.” Marvi worked quietly, waiting on the priso to expound, but other than chuckling to himself, he didn’t say anything more on the topic. Well, Marvi supposed it was not really her business, so she changed the subject and chatted cordially until the new light beam was installed and she rerouted power back to the panel. The darkened hall was filled with bright, cheerful light and Marvi let out a satisfied sigh. “Well, that’s that. Another task down.” The old light beam would need to be taken back to her shop for a repair and gas exchange, or refill, or whatever it ended up needing to get it up and running again. “Thank you again for your help. I should be able to get these back alright myself, I don’t want to take up too much of your time if you’ve still got your experiment to run.” From around the corner of the corridor, the distinct sound of a hab suite door opening was followed by approaching footsteps. A light on Aurrin’s comm device flashed and the priso’s long tail flicked excitedly back and forth. “No worries, it looks like my experiment is already underway.” Marvi felt the frills all along her body perk in curiosity, but before she could ask anything else, Human Karl rounded the corner. He grinned without showing his teeth, as it would have been a sign of aggression to many species on the ship, and gave a small wave as he approached. “Hey Karl,” Aurrin started. Marvi only partially listened as he started in on a spiel about his upcoming off-duty

plans. Instead, she was more interested in a quiet hissing noise and was trying to pinpoint where it was coming from. It sounded like… well it sounded almost like an atmospheric filter, one beside her own. Hers was in light operation since she was in a sector of the ship that was tuned to a generalized setting, but this noise sounded like a filter at full power output. Did Human Karl hear it? Could he hear it? Surely Aurrin could? She studied them, they didn’t seem to notice. The noise had started when Karl arrived, did that mean…? Her suspicions were confirmed the moment Karl opened his mouth to reply to Aurrin. “I’m actually on my way to…” What. The. Frewan? Human Karl’s voice, which was usually a calming deep tone, was disturbingly high and unnatural. The surprised expression on his face made Marvi’s core freeze. That meant this vocal change wasn’t some weird human thing? What was going on?! “I, woah,” the squeaky voice stuttered, “is this… helium? What is this? What’s going on?” He looked at the comm device strapped to his wrist and pulled up the readout. Sure enough, it was an increase of helium output from his atmospheric filter. The skin on his forehead wrinkled as he looked from the readout to Marvi and Aurrin, his eyes finally locking on the latter who was fiddling with something on his own comm device readout. “You punk! How did you do this? Change it back!” Karl started laughing a bit, Marvi wasn’t sure if it was directed at the ridiculousness of his voice or if it was because the helium was affecting his cognitive functions. She worried it was the latter. Panicking, Marvi approached to see if there was some sort of override. She had to act fast! Humans didn’t breathe helium, he could die! Before she could do anything though, Aurrin spoke up while trying to muffle his laughter. “Okay, okay, hoooo… I’ve deactivated it, you’re good. Keep talking though while your voice turns back to normal, you’re hilarious.” Karl gave him a look that Marvi couldn’t interpret. “What was that? How did you do that?” His voice was already back to normal and it sounded like a mix between annoyed, intrigued and amused. “When you came out of your hab suite, you passed a sensor I set up that overrode your atmospheric filter controls. My latest invention. Imagine this: a ship gets attacked and boarded. Normal defenses prove insufficient and the crew is in grave danger. As the hostiles pass hidden sensors, their atmospheric filters are overridden and they fall asleep, get loopy and confused, or simply pass out before they can get to and harm any crew.” Marvi and Karl blinked in unison while Aurrin’s tail swept side to side proudly. Marvi was the first to find words. “Your… your experiment?” Marvi glanced between Aurrin and Karl worriedly, “Is this what you were experimenting with? You ran it on a crewmate?!” “Well,” Aurrin’s ears pulled back slightly, but his whiskers still kept their amused look, “I say experiment pretty loosely. This was more of a field test. I ran all the actual experiments long ago. I knew exactly what would happen. And I did research on humans and I found out what effects helium has on them and I had to see it for myself. That’s why I was waiting for Karl.” The human in question was still laughing a bit - of course, a human would be able to laugh after nearly being asphyxiated, they’re crazy - before he ran his hand over his head to compose himself. “So this was a prank?” “For science.” “Of course. For science.” Karl’s smile suddenly morphed into a thoughtful frown. “Wait. Is this payback for the soap thing I pulled on you last week?” Aurrin’s face was statuesque and solemn as he stared silently at the human for a moment. “Yes.” “You’re the worst.” “Thank you.” “Want to go do this again in front of Aylin? She and Maruti-kar would think it’s hilarious.” “I had been planning on it. But only if we can get video evidence of it.” “For science?” “Naturally.” Marvi watched, hearts still beating rapidly from her panic, as Aurrin and Karl deactivated and retrieved the sensor to reenact the stunt she had just been a witness

to. Almost reflexively, she started tracing the side of her atmospheric filter. The quiet hum and hiss were calming. Helium to her was life. She’d thought it was toxic to others. And yet Aurrin thought it fine to use it on a human, and Karl was not only unworried about it but found it funny. Was it not dangerous?! And his voice? Why did it do that? She pulled up a search screen on her comm device and searched in the human database. Helium. Breathing. Voices. Apparently, helium took up space in their lungs that normally would be filled by oxygen, so yes, it was dangerous because they could asphyxiate. It also amplified higher-pitched tones of their vocal tract while simultaneously dampening lower tones because of the gas’s low density. That explained the voice change. And for some reason, the funny noise was enough of a reason to play around with deadly materials. Well, if anything, she supposed humans did keep to their MO pretty well. She picked the spent light beams back up and headed back to her shop, careful to not hit the ends on any walls or corners.

#humans are weird #space orcs #humans #aliens #helium #science #writeblr #original writing #space #spaceships

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vrishchikawrites · 3 years

Note

hello, are you still taking the short prompts? may i request for one where married wangxian met their younger counterparts during the study in Cloud Recesses? Maybe wangxian tease their younger selves and how their younger version and other disciples react to their arrival and to the teasing? Thank you!

"He looks almost... protective." Nie Huaisang observes to Jiang Wanyin and Wangji has to agree. His older self does seem to have an air of protectiveness about him.

He feels his fingers twitch when Wei Ying leans forward to study his future self, absolutely brazen and with no regard for personal space. The man who has accompanied his future self has the same air of mischief as Wei Ying does and seems entirely too amused.

Wei Ying is grinning, his expression inquisitive as he reaches forward and, much to his dismay, pokes the strange man's cheek.

The man laughs and his older self doesn't seem distrubed. Jiang Wanyin makes a noise of disgust but Wangji doesn't look at him. He wants to reach forward and snatch Wei Ying away.

"Wei Wuxian!" The Jiang heir snarls.

Both Wei Ying and the stranger look up at them. Something in the stranger's expression shifts, becoming a little more distant.

His future self glares.

Glares. At Jiang Wanyin.

Wangji knows himself and for him to openly express any sort of disdain for anyone is... quite telling. The expression is subtle enough that it escapes everyone notice. The stranger just huffs in amusement and nudges the older Lan Wangji with a smile.

That smile is familiar.

"What, Jiang Cheng? He doesn't mind! Tell him, Mo-quanbei!"

Mo-quanbei looks at Wei Ying with an expression of gentle reminiscence but there's something almost like... regret underneath it all. "No no, I don't mind at all!" He assures with a grin that's, again, strangely similar to Wei Ying's.

Jiang Wanyin stalks forward, his face lined with fury, "Just because people tolerate your-"

Lan Wangji smoothly steps before Wei Ying, blocking Jiang Wanyin's path.

"Aiya, Lan Zhan!" Senior Mo protests and Wei Ying seems baffled, peering around Lan Wangji to meet Wangji's gaze in question.

He has no explanation for his older self's behavior.

Jiang Wanyin seems torn. This Lan Wangji is their senior and obviously a very accomplished cultivator. His companion seems equally accomplished, though his air is certainly not as grave or weighty. He seems almost like Wei Ying in his playfulness and manner of speaking.

And they both seem to have some sort of bond with Wei Ying.

Wangji can't help but step forward, drawing everyone's attention towards him, "It is best for us to remain separate." He says, "Knowing too much of the future may cause unforeseen problems."

"Unlikely." Lan Wangji says, gently steadying Wei Ying as the boy attempts to peer past him. There's a slight spark of amusement in his gaze as he brushes Wei Ying's shoulder and fixes his hair.

Wangji struggles to contain his shock and fury. Who gave him the right to touch Wei Ying so brazenly? Like Wei Ying was his to-

"It is likely that the timeline has already split due to our presence here." Mo-quanbei says, shooting an amused look at Lan Wangji. His older self doesn't react, keeping his eyes on Wei Ying as the boy stares back at him in shock. "Whatever you learn will only help you."

"There are some things I would like to prevent."

"Lan Zhan!"

"Must protect Wei Ying."

And just like that, Wangji's entire perspective of things changes. He meets Wei Ying's gaze, who only looks at him once before turning away.

"What do you mean, protect him?" Jiang Wanyin demands but Wangji is already putting some pieces together. He sees how Lan Wangji keeps tracking Wei Ying's movements. How he stands between the boy and everyone else at all times.

Something happened to Wei Ying in the future.

He can't help but take a few steps forward, "We will protect him." I will protect him, he means to say.

His older self looks at him directly for the first time and there's an odd gentleness to him. His expression is ice cold but he seems more settled, content. "You will fail. At first."

Wangji feels his heart still for a small moment before it starts racing, "Fail?"

"Aiya, Lan Zhan, be gentle." Mo-quanbei says softly before moving around his future self. His smile towards Wangji is softest, most loving expression he has ever faced, "Don't worry too much, little Lan Zhan," Wangji is a bit too mesmerized to protest but Wei Ying does so on his behalf, "Just be who you are deep inside and everything will work out."

He doesn't know what kind of expression he wears because Mo-quanbei sighs and turns around to look at his older self, silently communicating.

Wei Ying is looking at him, his gaze sharp and contemplative. His eyes flicker towards his older self and he leans forward, expression curious once again, "Are we friends?"

Lan Wangji glances at Wangji before turning to Wei Ying, "He isn't worthy of your friendship yet, Wei Ying."

"Lan Zhan!" Mo-quanbei protests and his older self doesn't waver.

"But in time, he earns his place in your life and is your most trusted companion."

Mo-quanbei huffs, "If you're going to be mean to my Lan Zhan, I'm going to be mean to your Wei Ying."

Wangji feels rattled and meets Wei Ying's wide eyes helplessly. "You need to stop needling him." Mo-quanbei says, waving a finger at Wei Ying. "Be gentle, stop teasing him so harshly."

"But Wei-xiong teases everyone." Nie Huaisang says, "That's just his way of showing affection!

Wei Ying, oddly enough, straightens and focuses completely on Mo-quanbei. "He hasn't had anyone like you in his life. Sometimes you need to change your way of acquiring friendships, Wei Ying."

"Why does it matter?" Jiang Wanyin protests, "Lan Wangji hates him! Wei Wuxian should stop bothering him."

"No."

Wangji looks at his older self, surprised to hear an echo of his denial.

"Never hated Wei Ying." He says and his heart aches when Wei Ying looks at him in surprise.

His older self nods, "Never." He places a hand on Wei Ying's back and starts guiding him away, "We must talk."

Wangji makes to follow them but Mo-quanbei smiles and guides him away, "We are with me, little Lan Zhan!" He says cheerfully.

The story that follows makes his heart race and gut twist in fear.

"Wei Ying," He breathes when Mo-quanbei reveals who he really is, "You-"

"Aiya, don't worry too much. Just work together and I am confident you'll succeed!" Wei Ying pats his cheek and Wangji remains utterly still, soaking in the warmth of the man's hand.

Wei Ying expression is so full of love, Wangji can't help but lean into the palm a little, "Are we... friends?"

Wei Ying laughs, "Ah, Lan Zhan," He reaches up and tugs meaningfully at his forehead ribbon, "We are much more than that."

He swallows, struggling to deal with the flood of elation and nervousness sweeping through him.

When they rejoin the others, he can't help but seek his Wei Ying out. Silver eyes meet his gaze for a moment before flicking away.

There's an enchanting little blush riding high on Wei Ying's cheeks.

'Much more than that,' He thinks, feeling an odd flutter of hope in his chest, 'Wei Ying.'

(this turned out to be a little softer and less teasing. I always imagined that WWX and LWJ will be very kind to their younger selves, knowing what kind of trauma they're about to face.)

#lan wangji #wei wuixan #wangxian #wei ying #lan zhan #time travel #short prompts

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angelicmark · 3 years

Text

a montage of love (m)

part of the ‘almost’ collaboration hosted by @hyucksie

pairing: jaemin x reader

genre: angst, fluff, smut, neighbors!au, unhappy ending

warnings: explicit sex

wc: 15.3k

summary: Love was not the first thing to grace your mind when you met the man who moved into the apartment across from yours. Jaemin knows he can’t stay long, but you don’t. Creating long-lasting memories with someone who isn’t long-lasting is painful.

“have you ever had a love that’s bigger than you?”

your quick answer, no. you haven’t.

you frown as you read the words on the screen. your eyes scan the words a million times over, and it truly shouldn’t be a big deal to you. it was just a question that you already knew the answer to. you were a little unsure why it bothered you too much. it wasn’t like it was a big deal or anything. and it wasn’t like the question was apart of a quiz or anything, it was just on your screen and in front of you as you scrolled through social media.

you hum quietly to yourself before looking over to your best friend, renjun. his eyes glimmer under the light as he catches you staring. he gives you a scowl when you have a pout on your face, nodding his head at you.

“what’s up with you?” he asks quietly, and you huff.

“have you ever had a love that’s bigger than you?” you ask, looking at him with curious eyes.

renjun furrows his eyebrows, looking at you like you’re nuts, “what?” he sees the pout on your face and he visibly softens at the sight. he feels bad now, great. “um..” renjun pauses, thinking over the heavy words before slowly nodding his head. “i think i have.”

“what is it like? what does it mean?” your questions spill out of your mouth before you can stop them.

“it’s...” renjun squirms uncomfortably in his seat beside you on the couch, and he sees the curiosity lingering in your gaze. “it’s like.. falling in love with someone, impossibly too much. where your love almost feels...” he clears his throat, avoiding eye contact, “abandoned. it feels abandoned, i guess. your love for them consumes you.”

you sit back in your seat, letting out a hum, “wow,” you look at renjun and see his ears are turning slightly red as you let out a soft laugh, “i didn’t know you were so deep, renjun.”

renjun rolls his eyes, lightly kicking you and making you laugh harder, “shut up! you asked, idiot.”

you grin at him, “i didn’t think you’d actually answer. you normally don’t. you normally tell me to fuck off.” you laugh more as he rolls his eyes.

“if you ever fall in love,” he points at you, “you’ll get it.”

you nod your head, “i’ll let you know if i do.” you shrug your shoulders, “i don’t think i will though. not anytime soon, anyway.” you lean back into your seat again and stare at your phone, checking the time on your screen.

“should you be leaving soon? it’s almost midnight.” you chuckle again when you see the surprise on his face, eyes going wide as he quickly starts to gather his stuff.

“shit,” renjun mumbles, slipping his jacket over his shoulders and fumbling with his shoes as they slid on, “it’s that late already? what the fuck..”

you get up from your seat, making way to the front door to help renjun out. he gives you a bright smile as you open the door for him, “text me when you get back safe.” you say to him, watching as he walks out.

when he doesn’t respond back immediately, you almost tell him he’s being rude for not responding back, before you finally look over and notice a male trying to unlock his door across from your apartment. you frown, unaware of him moving in until now. you were guessing he was new, as that apartment hadn’t been rented out in months. renjun looks at you with an arched eyebrow, and you roll your eyes before shrugging your shoulders silently.

you mouth ‘i don’t know’ before looking back at the boy with bright blonde hair. you hear the small curse fall from his lips as he continues to struggle with the key. you giggle, looking back at renjun for a minute.

“i’ll see you later, renjun.” you wave him off, before grabbing your own key on your key hanger by your door so you don’t get locked out of your own apartment from trying to help someone else get into theirs. renjun just gives you a nod and a smile and a thumbs up. you scowl at him and he laughs, the sound echoing as he finally leaves to the elevators.

“need help?” you tilt your head as you stand in your doorway, not fully leaving your apartment without the approval of help.

the male jumps, giving you a look of surprise as his eyes go wide, and he looks at you for a few seconds. in those few seconds, you have time to admire him. he was quite handsome, and you definitely haven’t seen him before. you would remember him if you have. his nose was a perfect button nose, his lips slightly chapped but still perfectly shaped, his eyes round and a pretty brown shade, his eyebrows full. he was quite the looker.

the blonde sighs, “is it that obvious?” he speaks, his voice a lot deeper than you imagined. it was gravely and attractive.

you laugh lightly, “maybe a bit.” you finally step out of your apartment, and you notice the shock on his face, “i have my keys, don’t worry.”

he nods his head, “sorry, i’m new here.”

you shake your head, stepping beside him and holding your hand out for his key, “don’t be. i had a hard time with the locks here too when i first moved in. it took me awhile to perfect it, they can be a bit stubborn.”

he hands you the key, taking trust in you as your kind eyes glimmer under the soft light of the hallway, “thanks. i really couldn’t figure it out.”

you wave him off, shaking your head again as you stick the key in, before lifting it up and twisting, “the key is to lightly lift it up, sometimes they don’t align right. it’s a weird lock.” he watches as you unlock his door easily, not opening the door for his own privacy. you take the key out and slip it back in his hand with a smile, “there you go. if you ever need help again, just knock.”

the man nods his head, about to head inside before stopping himself and looking at you. you’re about to ask him what’s wrong, before he beats you to it. “what’s your name? so i know who i’m talking to?”

you smile at him, “y/n.”

he nods his head, “jaemin.”

you hold your hand out for him, giving him another warm smile, “nice to meet you, jaemin.” he grasps his hand in yours, and his grip is more firm than yours but his hands are quite soft to the touch. you falter a bit, feeling how soft his hand is and how his eyes scan your features with a glint you can’t quite pinpoint.

“nice to meet you, y/n.” your name sounded pretty coming out of his mouth, and he felt the same way about you saying his name. he was oddly attracted to you and your friendly nature, but he remained cautious. he was unsure if you were dating the man who left your apartment just minutes ago, so he kept his distance. jaemin smiles at you, and you realize he has perfect teeth as well. you want to curse at him for being so damn pretty, but you remain silent as you smile back gingerly.

“i’ll see you around, since you’re literally living across from me,” you let go of his hand and chuckle a bit.

he laughs back, his smile brightening up the whole damn room, “definitely.” he nods, giving you another polite smile before entering his apartment as you go to unlock yours.

when you finally make it inside your own apartment, you let out a breath you didn’t realize you were holding. since when did your complex start having hot guys living across from you? the last person to live across from you was an old lady and her cat. she was nice, but ended up living in a nursing home and moving out. the apartment had been empty for months after that, so this was quite the surprise. especially with it being someone as attractive as jaemin.

you run your hands over your face as you sigh again, very slowly releasing air from your lungs. “what the fuck..” you whisper to yourself, going to your room to change and get ready for bed. you jump as you slip your shirt over your head after completely changing, hearing your phone ring. you knew it was renjun, smiling to yourself as you pick up the phone and sit on your bed.

“i’m home, dork,” he drags out the last syllable of his sentence, and you scoff at him.

“thanks for letting me know,” you say, holding the phone against your ear as you hear the laugh renjun lets out on the other line.

“who was the dude across from you?” he asks, curiosity lacing his voice.

“someone really, really hot.” you gush, and you hear another booming laugh from renjun.

“wait, really?? do you know him?” renjun seems invested now, a smile being heard from his tone.

you roll your eye, “i don’t. he just told me his name before we parted ways after i helped with unlocking his door.”

“what’s his name?” he quickly asks, and you can already imagine him teasing you for having a hot guy living across from you.

“why should i tell you? you’re just going to tease me.” you fire back at him, a pout on your face.

renjun chuckles, “for knowing his name? c’mon, just tell me. i’m your best friend, remember? we tell each other everything, and it’s just his name, dude.”

you pause, “jaemin. his name is jaemin.”

“oooh,” you can hearing the taunting tone in his voice, making you scoff again and scowl.

“i wish you could see the distate on my face right now.”

“i can hear it, babe.” renjun grins, knowing you can’t see it but also knowing you can hear it.

you shift in your seat, making a fake hurling noise, “gross, don’t ever call me that.”

“whatever, i need to go to bed now. just wanted to know what was up with the dude across from you,” renjun states. “you should get some rest, too.” he quickly adds.

you smile, “aww, is renjun worried?” you coo at him, and you can already see the roll of his eyes and the scowl on his face.

“shut up, go to bed.” he snarls, “i am worried when our time together gets snatched away when you have a messed up sleep schedule. who else am i supposed to bother?”

“umm, hyuck?” you say like it’s obvious, making a face that you knew he couldn’t see.

“he actually annoys me, you don’t.” you’re about to counterattack his statement, but he doesn’t let you. “goodnight, go to sleep.”

you laugh, deciding to let it go, “goodnight, renjun.”

he hangs up, making you smile to yourself as you place your phone back down on your nightstand. you stretch your limbs, hearing a couple bones crack in the process before laying down. your eyes fall heavy within seconds, slipping easily into sleep as your mind becomes fuzzed by the man living across from you.

you were almost certain the two of you would end up talking more, and the thought excited you.

you hoped to become closer to jaemin.

“open the door, idiot!”

you huff as a reply, clearly struggling as you hold at least three bags in each of your hands, trying to scuff out your key in your pocket. grocery shopping with renjun had to have always been a hassle, especially when the two of you finally made it back to your apartment.

“take these,” you hand him three bags from one hand, and he scoffs playfully like a spoiled brat. “do you want the door open or not?” you raise an eyebrow.

“just open it. it doesn’t help that your apartment doesn’t have strong heaters in the hallways when it’s like three degrees outside.” renjun hurries you, gesturing towards your door with a free hand.

you laugh, quickly unlocking your door, but just as you unlock it, a familiar male walks up behind the two of you towards his own door. your handsome, gorgeous neighbor. renjun catches your eye, before adverting his gaze to the man behind the both of you. renjun’s eyes grow wide, and he smiles even brighter.

“i’ll take these!” he grabs your bags from you and hops inside and closes the door in front of you before you can really think about it. you gasp, eyes going wide in shock. you really could not believe him sometimes.

“fuck,” you grunt, pulling out your key again and trying to unlock your door as quickly as you could.

“did he just lock you out?” jaemin asks, and you whip your head in his direction, just to see a soft smile painting his pretty lips.

“no, i have my key, but it’s hard to unlock the door. i think you would know that best, huh?” you grin, and he sheepishly looks away for a split second before turning back to you.

“is your relationship always like that with him?” he questions, tilting his head in curiosity. he was afraid that curiosity would kill the cat right now. he was afraid of you confirming you were actually dating the man who just slammed your own door in front of your face.

“hm? renjun?” you look at him with furrowed eyebrows, “oh, we’re just friends, if that’s what you’re implying. but, yeah. we’re always like that with each other.”

jaemin feels his chest suddenly turn lighter, and he feels better about the whole entire situation between the two of you. he finds himself to be oddly infatuated with you after only really meeting with you twice in the apartment hallways. it was a refreshing feeling, for some reason, being around you. he really liked it, and your aura was calm and collected. someone he feels he could confide in. maybe he was thinking too quickly and rushing ahead, but you surely did give him a good impression. jaemin just guessed he was someone who became attached to people with good intentions very easily.

“ah, sorry for intruding, or something. i guess, maybe, i was curious.” jaemin answers this honestly, and you actually quite like his honesty.

you chuckle under your breath, “of me, or of him?”

jaemin smiles brightly, “you.”

for some reason, you weren’t really expecting him to be so straightforward, it caught you by surprise, making you widen your eyes and laugh in nervousness. “oh,” you laugh again, “i’m.. curious of you, too. if it helps.”

jaemin nods, watching as you lick your lips and give him a sweet look, “it does, it really does.” he pauses, before continuing, “am i being weird? i don’t mean to be, like, creepy or anything-” jaemin’s eyes go wide as he realizes how weird this may all seem to you.

you smile at him, letting out a laugh that makes jaemin stop breathing just so he can hear it, “it’s just a bit weird, i’m not sure i can trust someone as pretty as you.” you tilt your head, raising an eyebrow in his direction.

he chuckles lowly, “i could say the same for you. but i promise i’m not, like, weird. i just want to.. get to know you, i guess.”

“you guess?” you stare accusingly, and laugh at his shocked expression.

“i do, i do want to get to know you. i’m sure of it.” he quickly lets out.

your giggle rings in his ears, “you can breathe, jaemin. i’m just teasing..” you shift where you stand, “i’d like to get to know you, too.”

jaemin lets out a breath of relief, making you smile to yourself, “okay, great.”

“renjun’s in there, and mostly likely listen, so i should probably get inside now. plus it’s freezing out here, but i’ll talk to you more soon.” you smile warmly, and he can’t stop from smiling back. you turn towards your door, going to unlock it.

“alright, uh, do you want my number or-”

“some other time,” you interrupt him, “meeting in the hallway randomly is more fun.” you quickly unlock your door and swing it open, closing it behind you as you slip in with a sly smile on your face.

jaemin feels tingly as he watches you close the door while gazing sweetly and slyly at him. he was becoming more and more curious of you, and he enjoyed the excitement and thrill he got from you. in some ways, he liked how much he thought of you. maybe you were bad news, or dangerous territory. or maybe you were someone to call his own. he had no idea. but he really wanted to know.

either way, he needed to know.

stretching your limbs, you give a sweet smile towards renjun’s direction. he huffs in his seat, clearly displeased with you at the moment. your dynamic with renjun was quite a pair, and you actually really loved renjun’s attitude and every thing about him. renjun made it easy to be yourself, and you appreciated him lots.

“just tell me about him,” renjun urges you, scooting closer to you in his seat beside you on the couch. “tell me about this mysterious man living across from you.” he was completely intrigued. and extremely pushy.

you groan, “it’s not even the slightest a big deal, idiot. he just lives across from me.”

“but i heard every thing, i think we both know that by now.” renjun grins, and you scoff.

“you shouldn’t be spying on people, it’s weird.” you adjust in your seat to sit criss-cross.

renjun grabs the bowl of pop on the coffee table and eats a few pieces before speaking, “i have to make sure you’re alright, one way or another.”

“you’re just nosey, renjun.” you cross your arms this time and lean back into the arm of the couch.

“shut up.” he says curtly.

you breathe out a soft laugh, “you already heard every thing, it doesn’t matter what else i tell you.”

“i’m curious what you think of him,” renjun eats while staring at you with interest.

“he’s cute.” you state, and renjun gestures with his hand that you continue, making you roll your eyes. “i don’t know! i’ve only seen the dude like twice and only talked to him twice. it’s hard to take judgement.”

“that’s fair.” renjun shrugs.

there’s a long pause between the both of you, and you can feel renjun’s lingering gaze on you. you shoot him a look, “what?”

renjun shrugs again, “nothing, really. just keep an eye out for him, it’s always the pretty ones.”

you snort, “it’s not like i’m going to fall in love with him after seeing him twice.”

“only time really tells,” renjun stuffs his face again, looking away from you and towards his phone.

you sit silently after that, letting yourself consume in your thoughts alone. renjun might have been right, but you really didn’t see yourself falling for jaemin. maybe it was too early to tell. would it have been bad if you did?

“you okay? you look sick,” renjun raises an eyebrow at you, staring curiously.

you swallow, nodding your head, “yeah, i’m fine. just a bit tired, i guess.” you grab your glass of water from the table, taking two large gulps.

renjun nods, “me too. i should probably get going about now.” renjun gets up from his spot on your couch, stretching his arms out and placing the bowl of popcorn on the table. “keep me updated on jaemin. he’s the most interesting part about you right now.”

you huff, “shut up, dick.”

renjun laughs, heading towards the door and opening it, “i’ll see you later, cutie.”

you lean back, “bye, renjun.”

renjun nods, before leaving with a smug smile on his face and making you roll your eyes as he shuts your door. renjun put a lot of thoughts inside your head that night, and none of them felt good. you end up rolling around in bed, thinking of all the possibilities you could have with your new neighbor.

it was a long, long night to yourself.

“i told you, renjun. i’ll get it done.” you huff out a reply, finishing brushing your teeth as he stands in the bathroom doorway.

“when? because it definitely won’t be this lifetime at this rate.” renjun looks accusingly, and you roll your eyes.

“when i have time.”

“so, never.” you roll your eyes again and walk away from him, slithering past him through the doorway. renjun scoffs as you ignore him, “essays don’t write themselves, you know.”

you pause in your footsteps, sighing and hanging your head low before turning around to face him, “i’m aware. i’ll get it done, renjun. promise.”

renjun feels wary, but trusts you anyway, “sure.”

“i have to check the mail, i’ll be right back.” you state, grabbing your apartment key before leaving. renjun simply nods his head, plopping himself onto your couch.

heading towards the elevator, you press the button. you stand patiently, before catching sight of someone heading your way from down the hallway. you’re not exactly surprised when you see jaemin come into view, but you didn’t really expect it either. jaemin furrows his eyebrows, before giving you a cute smile. you can’t stop the small smile you give back.

“where are you heading?” he asks first, giving you a curious look.

“mailbox,” you shift on your feet as the elevator opens and the both of you step in.

jaemin nods, “weird. i am, too.”

you snort, “really?”

jaemin chuckles lightly, “nah, but i can accompany you, anyway. i was actually heading to the store, but i have some time to spare.”

you shake your head, “you don’t have to,” you smile sweetly, “i can go alone.”

jaemin lightly bumps you with his elbow, smiling softly, “i don’t mind. unless you just really don’t want to be around me.”

your eyes go wide, “no, of course not. i mean, i don’t mind. you can come.” you panic in your spot as the elevator doors ding open.

jaemin laughs breathily, and you learn you like the sound. he follows you out as you head towards the room with all of the mailboxes. it was more convenient that you had indoor mailboxes, rather than outdoor. that had to be one thing you really liked about this complex.

as you open the little mailbox, jaemin nods at you, “anything good?”

you laugh, shaking your head, “not really. just a few ads.” you sort through your mail, scanning over it.

“might as well check mine,” jaemin moves towards you, opening the mailbox right under yours. you watch him carefully as he pulls out quite a few papers from his box.

“anything good?” you repeat his own words, and he laughs quietly.

“nope, not really.” he’s vague in his answer, but you don’t really mind.

you nod your head, “looks like we both got a bad set of mail then, huh?”

jaemin chuckles and adverts his eyes away from his mail finally, “yeah, i guess so.”

“still going to the store?” you walk out of the room, heading towards the elevator, but stopping to talk to jaemin.

he nods his head, “yeah, i have to pick up a few things.” jaemin pauses, looking at you longingly before finally speaking again, “i like your presence.”

“we’ve only talked three times,” you state, feeling your nerves start to bubble up.

jaemin licks his lips, a gentle smile gracing his face, “yeah, but i already have a good feeling about you. is that weird?”

you go silent for a few minutes, before nodding, “yeah, just a bit.”

jaemin laughs, “sorry, i don’t mean to-”

“but i feel the same way about you.” you interject, and jaemin can’t stop the bright smile he gives you. you realize you really like his smile, too. he was gorgeous, the prettiest you’ve ever seen. it was strange to think that he could possibly find you interesting, or that he liked being around you in such a short amount of time, but you couldn’t find it in yourself to complain.

jaemin lets the air linger for just a bit longer, before nodding his head, “i’ll see you around, neighbor.”

you smile back, “of course.” and you like the way he stares for just a bit longer, before heading out of the lobby. you like his bright smile that you think of all the way back to your apartment. you like the feeling of warmth you get thinking of the fact that he likes your presence. you like the feeling jaemin gives you in just such a short amount of time. maybe it was dangerous, and obviously too quick. but you really liked feeling like this.

when you unlock your apartment door, renjun gives you a stare, “i heard him leave his apartment. did you see him?”

you roll your eyes, “you are so damn nosey.”

renjun just laughs, clearly agreeing with you.

you and jaemin have met a few more times at random hours of the day after that within the next month, and you started to learn some things about him along the way. he likes to ruffle his hair a bit when he’s thinking, or when he feels a bit nervous. he has a tendency to overthink everything he says. he has a habit of licking his lips when he’s in deep thought, or realizes something. you learned a bit too much about him in such a short amount of time, but you really enjoyed his company along the way.

“oh, you have laundry, too?” you hear a familiar, deep voice that makes your spine shiver.

you whip your head around, eyes wide out of shock, “holy shit, you scared me.”

the black haired male laughs, “sorry, didn’t mean to.”

“it’s fine, it’s fine. just wasn’t expecting you, that’s all.” you continue throwing your clothes in the dryer, calming down a bit. jaemin dyed his hair black just about a week ago, and you find the color to suit him just a bit better. you liked blonde, too. but the black hair just looked prettier, in your opinion.

“you would know if you had my number,” jaemin sings quietly, placing his pile of clothes onto the dryer next to yours. you didn’t see him take them out of the washer, but he must have because they were damp.

you giggle a bit, and jaemin enjoys the sound, “you got me there.” you pause a bit. you knew you could trust him with your number, but a part of you liked meeting up at random times of the day, or night. maybe you were even scared to get closer than this.

“it’s fine, by the way. i’m not going to pressure you into giving me your number, i was just making a joke.” he’s overthinking. you can tell when he starts to speak a bit faster than usual, ushering out his words so he can quickly make his point.

you shake your head, smiling softly, “no, no. i think i should give you my number about now. it’s been like, what? almost two months?” you raise an eyebrow teasingly, holding out your hand, “give me your phone, i’ll put it in.”

jaemin freezes in his spot, eyes going a bit wide, “uh, wait, you don’t have-”

“i know, but i want to.” you state firmly, and jaemin swallows before nodding his head and handing you his phone. you place your number in quickly, adding your contact with your name in it. you weren’t sure how far this would take it into your acquaintance, or friendship or whatever, with him but you were prepared either way.

“nice, now i can text you whenever i want.” jaemin smiles.

“or call, i like calls a bit better.” you close the lid of the dryer after adding a dryer sheet, and jaemin begins to place his clothes in finally and following your steps.

“i’ll call then.” jaemin feels giddy at the thought of finally having your number, and being able to talk to you basically whenever he wants to.

you nod your head, smiling to yourself, “i look forward to it, jaemin.”

jaemin likes the way you say his name, and he likes the way you smile at him after. he likes the feeling you give him too, much to your unknowing. maybe jaemin was being a bit selfish at the moment, but he wanted to have you around for as long as he could.

jaemin has taken a liking towards you.

“so, you finally have his number?” renjun looks at you with teasing eyes, and you already want to shove him out of your apartment.

you huff out a breath, “no, i don’t, renjun. i gave him mine.”

renjun’s quiet for a few seconds, but you can see the bright smile lingering on his face from the corner of your eye. “has he texted or called yet?” renjun leans his head in his hand at the breakfast counter, turning his body to fully face you.

“nope,” you state. renjun hums, and you’re afraid to ask what he’s thinking. “what?”

“nothing, really. you could always just go visit him whenever you want, especially since he lives right across from you.” renjun has such a sweet smile on his face, but you hate when he gets really sweet like this. it’s never exactly a good thing.

“i’m not doing that.” you finally fully look over at him, giving him a serious look as to erase all future thoughts from his head.

renjun raises his hands up in defense, “i’m just saying! i wasn’t gonna do anything.” you squint your eyes at him, and renjun laughs. “i’m serious. it’s not my love life, i’m not going to interfere.”

you nod your head, looking warily, “okay, thank you.” you go back to highlighting parts of your notes for your homework, before whipping your head around with wide eyes after realizing what he just said, “love life?!”

renjun laughs extremely loud, echoing throughout the whole entire apartment. and you almost miss the way your phone starts ringing in your pocket. you jump in surprise, before glaring at renjun when he laughs harder at your expense. you slide your phone out of your pocket, checking the caller briefly.

“fucking hell,” you mutter. the world had to be against you.

“who is it?” renjun calms down, sounding out of breath from laughing too much.

you roll your eyes, but smile softly, “unknown number.”

renjun’s eyes go wide, and he suddenly looks like a kid on christmas, “it has to be jaemin, answer it! i’m not here, just answer it.”

you scoff, but answer anyway, “hello?” best case scenario it wasn’t jaemin, and it was just someone who got the wrong-

“hey, y/n right?”

fuck.

his voice was even gorgeous through call. most times it was a muffled sound, but even when his voice is muffled it still sounds heavenly. you feel a tingle down your spine at the sound, and you genuinely think you could fall asleep listening to him.

“jaemin?” you knew it was him.

“hey, thank fuck. i was really hoping you didn’t give me a pizza place number, or something.” jaemin lets out a sweet chuckle that rings through your ears.

you see renjun smiling from ear to ear, and you glare back before answering jaemin with a laugh of your own, “i wouldn’t do that. especially since we’re neighbors.” and he was a sweet guy with a beautiful face, but you weren’t going to say that in front of renjun, or jaemin.

jaemin could feel his heart start to pick up at the sound of your voice. in your own little way, you were enchanting to jaemin already. being neighbors with you was such a lucky shot, and he felt glad to stay here for the time being. he knew he couldn’t stay forever, but you were such a fresh breath of air that he almost wanted to. the odds were always against him, until he seemed to have met you.

“still there?” you speak, and it makes jaemin’s palms start to sweat, almost dropping his phone out of his hand.

“yeah, sorry, i got distracted for a minute.” jaemin pauses, before continuing, “are you busy this weekend?” he felt bold today, maybe too bold.

your eyes divert to renjun, and he just gestures with his hands to keep talking, “no, i’m not.”

and jaemin nods his head, as if you could see him, “great, uh.. would you like to hang out.. or something?” jaemin felt incredibly nervous, too nervous for his liking. he felt like a dumb middle schooler boy who didn’t know how to ask a girl out. you made him more nervous than he could handle, but he couldn’t say it was completely a bad thing. he hasn’t felt this way for anyone in a really long time. you were his fresh start while he still had you.

you lick your lips, feeling your stomach start to twist at the thought of actually hanging out with him and not just wandering around the apartment with him at random hours. “of course, i would love to.” you smile anyway, and you just know renjun is teasing you for it in his mind right now.

“great, i’ll text you this weekend. i don’t really have anything planned, if i’m being honest. i sort of went out on a whim there,” jaemin laughs nervously, and you find it cute.

“it’s alright, we’ll figure out what to do.” you feel giddy and excited, mentally preparing yourself to actually be around him for more than thirty minutes.

“great, alright, i’ll see you then.”

“alright, bye, jaemin.” he really, really likes the way you say his name.

“bye, y/n.”

hanging up, you see renjun with the biggest shit eating grin on his face than you have ever fucking seen.

“so...”

“don’t even start, renjun.” you place your hand up, interrupting him.

renjun laughs, “what?! i didn’t even say anything!”

“you’re going to call it a date.”

“is that not what it is?”

you slap his arm, and he doesn’t stop laughing in your face for the rest of the night about it.

“you cannot get enough of me, can you?” you say it in a sly voice, a smirk on your face as renjun rolls his eyes.

“i get bored easily and you’re fun to mess with,” renjun walks through your door and you frown.

“i didn’t say come in.”

“too late,” renjun smiles, and you scoff. “so, when’s your date?”

“will you ever let that go?” you plop on the couch the same time he does.

“nope.” he smiles sweetly, and you huff. “so, when is it?”

you give up reasoning with him, leaning back into your couch, “tomorrow. i’m not even sure what we’re going to do.”

renjun nods, “there’s not really much to do.”

you cross your legs, “yeah, i know. maybe we’ll get coffee, or something.”

“most likely. not a bad date, if you ask me.” renjun grins, and you roll your eyes, but smile back anyway.

your dynamic with renjun was quite different, but you found it to be in a good way. you play fought a lot, and nothing was ever really taken seriously and the two of you knew when to draw the line. you only really knew renjun for a few years now, meeting in junior year of high school and becoming extremely close. you grew to know both him, and his small group of friends. he wasn’t exactly the most social of them all, but he knew who to pick and choose to be his friends. being around renjun was like having a brother, and you thought maybe you would end up finding him more annoying as the years increased but you never did. safe to say, you do love renjun.

you stretch your arms upwards, “why are you here?”

“i’m always here,” renjun raises an eyebrow at you, and you shrug.

“touché.”

your mind subconsciously wanders back towards jaemin as renjun starts to scroll on his phone. you clearly haven’t known him long enough, but you wanted to know him long enough. you had no idea what he meant for you in the future, but you were just hoping you wouldn’t regret anything.

and you didn’t. but maybe past you hoped it ended differently.

“you good?” renjun asks out of habit.

you nod your head, “yeah, why?”

“you look deep in thought.” he looks curious.

“just a bit, yeah.” and you were telling the truth. you weren’t going to admit you were thinking of jaemin, obviously, but you couldn’t help the way you felt when you did think of him. it was like having a crush in high school or something, and you felt almost embarrassed to admit it to yourself.

“is it about jaemin? if you’re worried, i’m sure it’ll be fine.” renjun looks sincere, “you can always call me if you need something, or someone.” renjun quite obviously had a soft spot for you, believe it or not. and you appreciated him like no other.

“thank you, renjun. i appreciate it.” you smile, giving him a soft look.

he nods back, “of course, anything for you.”

“you’re so mushy for me,” you drag out the last syllable, scooting closer to him on the couch and hugging onto his arm, nuzzling your face into it.

renjun scoffs and pulls a disgusted face, trying to wiggle away from you, “i’m just looking out for you, weirdo. can’t have you feeling uncomfortable, or anything.”

you love how thoughtful he is, and you truly do feel lucky to have him, “thanks, dude.”

he chuckles, “yeah, yeah. whatever.” he tries to sound nonchalant, but he has a sweet grin on his face, letting you know he really, truly does care a lot for you. “now, what are you going to wear on your date?”

you groan, “oh my god.”

your fingers are cold. freezing even. you can feel your whole entire body light afire, except your fingers. they’re cold to the touch, and you can feel the way your bones start to ache in the process. you let out a soft heave, easily slipping out of your mattress to be met with the cold, hardwood floor. maybe you should have worn socks to sleep, just that once.

your mind feels muddled as you check the screen on your phone for the first time this morning. renjun’s name flickers by as you scan your notifications, but jaemin’s name seems to stick out the most. he sent you a text about an hour ago.

you decide to call him, a confident feeling swelling within your chest as you listen to the rings. maybe you shouldn’t have called, but there really wasn’t any going back now. especially not when you heard the call skip a beat, signaling someone had picked up.

“hello?” his voice is shaky, and you feel nerves start to rise within you.

“still on for today?” you try to sound composed, but you knew you weren’t. it was a fake.

a rumbled chuckle emits into the speaker, “of course, are you?”

“of course.” you want to stop the smile spreading on your face and reaching your cheekbones, but you can’t.

“are you home?” he asks quietly, as if he was reaching for something far away and accidentally moved the phone away from his face.

you clutch onto your phone a bit tighter, “i am.”

“can i come over?” jaemin had no plans. maybe he just simply wanted to be around you and get to know you better, bit by bit. he knew it was a bold move to ask if he could enter your apartment so early, but he was hoping you would agree. he wanted to feel the blatant aroma your own personal home had.

you shift in your spot, “let me throw on some warmer clothes really quick.” you shiver as you finally stand, quickly reaching for a hoodie and some leggings. you didn’t need to impress him. you couldn’t find a need to.

“alright, let me know when you’re ready.” jaemin has a smile gleaming on his features, much to his dismay. he hangs up before you reply, his nerves starting to eat him alive already. he asked to go over, so why is he so damn nervous?

you let out a shaky breath of air as you quickly fix your hair and throw on a pair of warm socks. were you really about to let your neighbor into your comfort zone? you thought it over for a few minutes and figured, yes, you were. sending a quick text to jaemin, you anticipate the next few minutes as you wait for a knock on the door. you almost jump when you hear the clatter of his door opening and closing, and then a few quick knocks on your own door.

swinging open the door, you’re met with the same black haired male you had seen several times in random areas of your apartment complex. he looks the same as always, still just as breathtaking as the last time you saw him. up close, you’re still never quite used to how truly pretty he can be. the hallway lights glimmer above him and illuminate a soft glow on his cheeks, making him just the more appealing.

“hey,” you start after a few seconds of embarrassingly staring. maybe jaemin noticed, or maybe he didn’t. either way, he didn’t bring it up or imply that he noticed.

“hey,” his voice is gravely and it makes you tug just softly at the sleeves of your hoodie.

you move away from your doorway, nerves spiking up within the both of you. “come in.” you don’t sound unsure of yourself, and you knew you weren’t.

jaemin slowly slides in, listening as you close the door behind him. he catches sight of the pale grey couch you have in the middle of the living room, eyes scanning the breakfast bar just a couple feet away. it was a small, convenient apartment and looked almost identical to his own. but your place definitely had a different feeling from his. yours felt warmer, a lot warmer. it was more of a home than it was a place to stay, and he soon realized your differences because of it. you had a home, and he just had a place to live. he can’t seem to stop the tugging at his heart as he watches you trudge towards the kitchen.

“want a water?” you have an inviting voice that makes jaemin want to get lost in.

“uh, sure.” his throat feels dry, looking around and seeing a hallway the most likely connects to your room, along with a bathroom.

“here you go,” you’re holding two water bottles. one for him, one for you. he hastily takes it from your hand, opening it with ease and taking a few large gulps. “do you like my place? sorry if it’s a bit dirty, i wasn’t expecting you to come in, or anything.”

jaemin smiles softly, “it’s nice. i like how warm it is in here.” he wasn’t lying. not in the slightest bit was he lying.

“great, i’m glad.” you smile back, and jaemin feels his cheeks start to rise in heat already. he wasn’t used to feeling this way, he felt so unsure. “so, why did you move here?”

jaemin hums, “hm, it was a cheap offer and..” he was nervous. he couldn’t bring himself to be honest with you and tell you the reason why he was truly here. he couldn’t tell you that the other reason was because he knew it wouldn’t be long before he left. again. again and again, he leaves. “and a little far from the loud street noises. last place i stayed was too loud for my liking.” he wasn’t lying, not completely. his last apartment was actually too loud and prompted him to get constant headaches. it wasn’t the slightest comfortable.

“ah, makes sense.” you nod your head, and jaemin finds the slightest gesture endearing. he hoped he wasn’t dreaming when you lured him towards the couch, patting the side beside you. “come sit.”

jaemin had no plans. absolutely zero. but this was definitely better than anything he could have possibly came up with if he did plan. maybe he was a bit immature for getting excited and giddy at the thought of sitting so close to you, in your own apartment, but he couldn’t exactly help it. slipping himself next to you, he’s welcomed to a warm and comforting smile by you.

“i like your smile.”

embarrassing. truly embarrassing.

jaemin catches himself slapping a hand over his mouth, eyes just as wide as yours. the statement caught both of you by surprise, but his heart brightened when you let out the sweetest laugh he had ever heard in all his years of living. the smile reached your eyes, and the sound echoed through his ears and crawled within his bones. he could feel the aching.

“i like yours, too. thank you, jaemin.” his name falling from your lips sounded so effortlessly. and you’ll admit that it felt effortlessly, too.

“thanks” he sounds sheepish, and you can see the way his ears light up a cute red, pink dusting his cheeks from shame. you could tease him further, but decided against it. normally, you would have. but something about jaemin made you feel more cautious and careful, and you couldn’t say it was a bad thing. you just certainly didn’t want to chase him off so soon. he had a bambi-like personality in your eyes, and you didn’t want to ruin whatever this was so far.

you take a sip of your water, and jaemin watches as you swallow it down. everything you do seems to be so graceful, and he almost felt blinded by everything you do. when you place the bottle of water onto the small table in front of the couch, he follows your lead and places his own next to yours. the cold liquid along the edges of the water bottle quickly fall onto the glass table, creating a ring around it. the air fills with silence between the two of you, and it feels almost tense.

“you tend to overthink things, don’t you?” you read him too well. it was a bit scary on his end.

jaemin shifts in his seat, clearing his throat as he looks away from the water, “yeah, just a bit.”

you chuckle under your breath, “we’ve been silent for almost two minutes, jaemin. you seem to have a lot on your mind most of the time.”

jaemin nods, “yeah, sorry about that. i’m not sure i’ll ever be able to fix something like that.” the soft laugh jaemin let's out is quiet and airy, but you like the sound anyway.

“don’t be sorry,” your fingers are cold again. “i get that way, too. i try not to, but it always seems to just creep back up on me, i guess.” you shrug your shoulders, tugging on the ends of your sleeves again to warm up your hands.

“it’s a bad habit of mine, much like the many others i have.” jaemin admits this absentmindedly, not really thinking much of it this time.

“you can say whatever with me.” you confirm a trustworthy presence, and jaemin desperately wants to take you up on the offer. he knows that, deep within, he won’t be able to.

“thank you, same goes for you.” jaemin places a faux smile on his face, despite his heart thrumming in his chest and his stomach stirring in endless nerves. you’ve been in the same room for almost thirty minutes now, and he still hasn’t calmed down. you can’t really say you’re doing any better than him, but neither of you know what the other is thinking, or feeling.

“thank you,” you don’t stop offering soft, unspoken smiles for the rest of the time he’s with you. and it starts to feel easier, and easier as time rolls by and you’re both eating lunch together. lunch turns into evening into dinner into late. it feels almost surreal spending so much time together, even going for a coffee run in between. you discovered that day that jaemin quite thoroughly enjoys his coffee, and you can smell the constant coffee on his clothes when he steps just a bit closer to you than usual.

jaemin discovers the same day that you are a refreshing piece in his life that he’s happy to know, and glad to have. time will tear the two of you apart, but as he watches you laugh at a joke he exclaims, he can’t find it in himself to worry about time. he can’t find it in himself to worry about the future, or what it will look like for him.

time stood still around you.

it was late, so late. you felt like you were on top of the world for the first time in a very, very long time. you wore a dress just this once, a cute sundress that contrasted to the dark night. jaemin sat peacefully on the edge of your bed, eyes watching the way yours glaze over in slight tiredness and excitement. it was late, so damn late. but you were loving the tightening feeling you get in your chest every time you catch jaemin staring at you with shiny, struck eyes. it was euphoric and exhilarating. don’t go away, don’t make this feeling go away. you were silently pleading.

“do you like music?” you question with a tilt of your head, staring right through him.

his breath hitches a little, “i do.”

you nod, “who doesn’t?”

you catch yourself admiring the way jaemin looks under the moonlight as a small candle wax warmer plugged into the wall illuminates the room just as much as the moon does. his eyes sparkled watching you, and you tried your best not to notice. but it was hard not to. you felt like you were getting caught up in the little things, but you found the little things to be what always mattered to you. maybe there was an open door for you, without you even knowing.

jaemin enjoys the way your eyes flitter around the room and the way you look out the window towards the moon, before returning your gaze back onto him. it’s a whirlwind of emotions that come crashing down on him when he realizes that you’ve snuck your way into his world. his silently, kept world. and he feels his head on his shoulders so suddenly, and he feels his heart starting to break apart his ribcage. he feels the way his hands suddenly reach out for you, grabbing your hand and pulling you towards him.

he feels himself reaching. reaching for you.

and you feel yourself collapse into him, abruptly being pulled into the secrecy of his hold. it’s so intense, and you both can feel fires being started inside your stomachs. jaemin knows this could possibly ruin everything, and completely start something new between the both of you. but he also knows that if he doesn’t do anything now, he’ll regret it forever. over the course of three months of simply getting to know you, be around you, it’s consumed him whole and burned him into something possibly greater. something more new, more bold, more needy. jaemin didn’t realize how selfish his actions may have been, or what the future could ever hold for him, or for you. jaemin was needy, so damn needy.

maybe a part of him was hoping you would cure him. cure him of the never ending cycle he seemed to be repeating. he was stuck. he was hoping you would get him out.

jaemin is taking, and taking. the moment he feels your lips press against his own, he feels himself slip away. the reality of the situation he put himself in, falls to pieces and crumbles beneath his feet. nothing felt real, yet everything felt too real. the way your hand shakily pressed against his cheek and felt the warmth beneath them, the way you curled your other hand into his hair and softly tugged, emitting a soft noise of approval to fall past his lips and into your own. jaemin had no idea what he was doing. he had absolutely no fucking clue. all he knew was that he had you here with him, in his hold, in the comforts of your room. jaemin knew little to nothing what he was doing. he fell into a deeper hole than he could ever get out of, but he regrets nothing. especially not when you kiss him deeper, stronger, more shallow. especially not when he feels his hands trail along your thighs to feel just how warm your skin is beneath your dress. especially not when you clamber clumsily into his lap, not breaking a single second of the kiss.

especially not when he has you.

selfish, he hears a whisper in his head, so selfish.

you were shocked. you were stunned into a kissing silence, but you couldn’t exactly bring yourself out of it. you didn’t want to, not in the slightest did you want to let go of this very moment. have you ever felt a closeness like this before? certainly not. no, definitely not. and that’s not to say you’ve never kissed anyone. you’ve just never felt the shaking in your hands the way you did then. you’ve never felt the pit of your stomach rise up and consume you into a hot, searing want and need of another’s touch. you’ve never felt so connected and lost at the same time while being with someone. and you found it more special than your heart intended it to be.

kissing jaemin was not the same as kissing the rest. you’ve learned the hard way tonight.

and it all goes by faster than what jaemin, or you, had in mind. kisses turned rough and needy, hands hastily grasping at one another like you need each other. and maybe jaemin believed that he did need you. and it had shaken him like a leaf the night, holding you so close and locking you into his embrace.

“we don’t..” jaemin’s out of breath, lips swollen and a bright pink. you like the sight before you, “we don’t have to do anything.”

you tilt your head in confusion, rolling your hips down into his own in want and need. the breathy sigh jaemin exhales is enough to excite you, making you want more and more, “we don’t.” you agree with him.

jaemin looks at you for a solid ten seconds, even opting to count in his head for how long the tension was held, before kissing you once again and taking you as his own. jaemin is taking, and taking, and taking. and you would let him a thousand times over, if it meant him staying and being close like this forever. you enjoyed the feeling he gave you, maybe a bit too much. it felt like he was worshipping you, rather than getting ready to fuck you senseless. you weren’t exactly opposed to either, though.

“i don’t have a condom,” jaemin announces when you’re splayed beneath him, looking as beautiful as ever. he had never seen a sight so heart wrenching until then, and he wanted to blame the ache in his heart for being so reckless with his feelings.

you let a soft laugh that echoes into the air and makes its way into jaemin’s soul, “don’t worry, i’m on the pill. please, i need you.”

you need him. and he wishes it were in more ways than one. but then that would be plain selfish, right..? right?

jaemin’s body shakes when he enters you, “you’re so tight, and warm.” he huffs out a breath, and listens to the way you let out a pleased sound. you felt like you were on fire, body heating up with his own and clutching desperately onto his shoulders. he could feel the sharp parts of your nails starting to dig deeper and deeper into his skin, but he didn’t mind. he didn’t mind at all, actually.

“move,” you let out a shaky breath, “please, move.”

jaemin has so self control around you, and he finds it just slightly dangerous. when he begins to move, a shock runs up and down your spine. he watches the way your eyes roll back into your head, and he let’s out a soft groan of his own. the sight of you, the sound of you, the feel of you. it’s all too much for him, and yet not enough at the same time.

jaemin feels himself straining the more he fucks into his, and you can feel him pulsing inside you, hitting right where you need him most. it feel so good, so fucking good. you never want to let go of him. you never want to let go of this moment, this memory.

“you feel so.. so good,” he utters out sweet words that sends a chill through your whole entire body.

“you, too. god, you too. you’re fucking me.. so well.” your response is breathy, a choked moan leaving you as he speeds up his pace just a bit more.

nothing felt wrong. nothing felt out of place in jaemin’s world. not when it came to you. and you could confidently say the same thing for him. maybe it was fast, too fast. everything seemed to be moving by within a blink of an eye, but you just felt so.. happy. so content. you were lost in a world where jaemin took over, and you couldn’t complain. not even once could you complain.

when jaemin feels himself getting close, leans down to kiss you, “you’re wrapping so tightly around me.” he meant in more than one way, not that you would know or anything.

“fuck,” you scratch along his back and bring him closer to you, wrapping your legs around his waist so he’s deeper inside you, “i’m so close..” your whines are so precious, a song in his head he wishes to repeat.

“you can cum, baby.” the nickname has you shivering, “cum for me. be my sweet, good girl and cum for me.”

you fall in the trap, clenching and unclenching around his length and falling apart in his arms. jaemin shudders a quiet “fuck” and falls apart with you, release deep inside you and riding out both of your highs. you feel full with his cum inside you, and jaemin feels worn out but content. sweat lingering on his forehead as he drops his head into your neck, peppering light kisses there as to prove he’s still there.

so, so close. you’re so close. jaemin’s heart is beating too fast for him to keep up, and it’s so hot in the room now. he feels himself crashing before he can even fall.

selfish, he hears again, so selfish.

“so,” renjun starts, and you already feel the regret sink into your skin, “what you’re telling me is, you’re not dating still?”

you roll your eyes, “not everything has to have a label on it, renjun. it was such a sudden, spur of the moment kind of thing.” you twist nervously, and renjun scoffs where he stands.

“you fucked.” “and? we’re adults. adults fuck.” you spit back, arranging your clothes in your closet and putting them away. renjun leans against the doorframe, watching you with ease. maybe renjun worries too much for you, but something about the situation makes him anxious and full of worry. he wasn’t used to it.

“touché.” renjun doesn’t say much else, leaving his pondering thoughts inside his head. you catch on, though.

sighing, you hang up your last bit of clothing before turning towards him, “whatever happens, i’m sure i can handle it.”

renjun doesn’t doubt you. not for a second does he doubt you. but he simply doesn’t want you to be put into a tough situation that you struggle to get out of. renjun is incredibly happy for you. but sometimes momentarily held romances aren’t good for the soul. they crush you and you have to find a way to make yourself new again. renjun didn’t want that for you.

“i know you can.” he simply replies, and he lets you handle it yourself. maybe a part of him wishes he had stepped in and told you to back down. but you probably wouldn’t have listened.

maybe you knew. maybe a part of you knew it wouldn’t end well after that night. but you held on anyway, and you can’t blame yourself for trying. you needed to know in order to not wonder.

“i have to go,” renjun checks the time on his phone, “please text me if you need anything, i’ll answer when i can.”

you nod your head, “of course, you too.”

renjun leaves the room with a hum, and when you hear the door close, you realize you’re stuck alone with your thoughts again. maybe jaemin shouldn’t have consumed so much of your brain the way he did. in fact, you knew he shouldn’t have.

little did either of you know, you were both living in a painful silence.

seeing you again, for jaemin, was like seeing light again after many years of living in the dark. your smile warmed his heart, and set his body aflame. nothing for jaemin was set in stone, and the harsh reality dawned on him at such an odd, painful time. he hoped his mind would give him a break in the presence of you, but he was hopeful too soon. way too soon.

you sigh, a sound jaemin became used to hearing over the past few months, “forever.”

jaemin feels pricks starting to form in his skin, “uh.. what?”

you laugh lightly at the slight panic you hear in his voice, “forever is such a commitment, terrifying if you ask me.” jaemin couldn’t agree more. “and.. you’re stuck with yourself. forever.”

jaemin wants to fill the tense silence in the air, but can’t bring himself to speak.

“it all comes down to one thing,” you pause, taking a light sip of your warm tea, “and it’s you. it’s always going to be yourself.. i think about this a lot, you know.” you place your tea down, resting your head in your hand on your breakfast bar as the both of you sit there. “no matter what decisions you make, or what decisions others make, you’ll still have yourself. i think there’s times where i remember why i chose this life.”

you look at him.

“why i chose to be me.”

jaemin kisses you out of instinct. he feels a pain start to flood his bones and consume his brain. listening to you was a new type of ache, and he wasn’t sure how much more of it he could take. foreign feelings seem to swallow him whole before he can really start to take a look back to what he was before. it feels like pins and needles are stabbing right through him the longer he kisses you, the longer you kiss him back. the more he feels your touch, the more he wants. it’s such a dangerous bridge that he’s starting to cross, but he can’t find it in himself to stop getting lost in you.

you could say the same for him. you were so lost in him, deep in whatever he had given to you. burning to the touch. tangling between unspoken words and soft touches.

such a mess, you think.

a mess you were willing to clean up, if it meant being like this for a bit longer.

you were committing yourself to a future type of pain you were unsure you would be able to take. but you stayed anyway. and jaemin held you in a way you weren’t quite used to yet, but could definitely get used to. you were breathing the same air as him, right in that moment. and jaemin found himself cupping your jaw to angle the kiss more to his favor, and you found yourself entangling your heart with his in a clumsy way you haven’t done before. you’ve fallen in love before, and you definitely wouldn’t say you were in love with him. not in any way were you in love with jaemin.

but you were beginning.

it was the beginning of your fall.

you were burning. you could feel your whole entire being start to burn, and ache, and turn into ash. you were starting to learn it wasn’t a good feeling; standing in front of jaemin, eyes narrowed, brows furrowed, confusion and frustration written on your face. jaemin looked worried, and lost. you weren’t used to such an expression on his face, and you were sure you would remember this memory too for as long as you lived. painful memories don’t seem to fade either, no matter how much you want them to.

jaemin sits on your couch, and he suddenly feels like a child being scolded for something he did. maybe he deserved to be scolded right now. the whole entire situation was messy, and completely out of his hands. he could lie to you. he could lie right now and give you an answer that you want, but he knows that’s worse than holding the real answer from you. he wants to let it all out, he wants to show you everything you’re missing in context. but he can’t. and it pains him more than he thought it would.

selfish, repetition, so selfish.

“i just.. can’t.” vague. he’s too vague with you. you realized that, over time, jaemin had given you little to nothing while you gave him everything. this would mark month five into whatever the fuck you were doing, and it was starting to get miserable in such a short amount of time.

you sigh, placing yourself next to him on the couch. how did it come to this? you were honestly just a bit curious of where you stood with him, after about two months of just fucking and kissing and his romantic gestures screwing you over, it was getting frustrating. he started to consume your brain and thoughts late at night when you had no one to console you. he was like a ghost, haunting you at the worst times and creating a distant memory that would stick forever. lingering around you.

“i never asked for a specific label,” you started, tone starting to get bitter, “i just wanted to know where your head was at.. you confuse me, jaemin.” you look at him, and his gaze stays lowered to the ground. “i know barely anything about you. i only really know why you moved here, and even that was fairly vague. i’m lost, jaemin. i’m very lost.”

he was too. jaemin was so, so damn lost. he fell down a hole he dug himself, and now it’s too steep and he can’t seem to find a way out. jaemin can’t tell you that he has to leave soon. he can’t bring it in himself to just let it all out and tell you what exactly is holding him back from just being with you. this thought causes jaemin to finally make eye contact with you, and he can see the water starting to well in his own eyes. he catches the shock on your face when you realize that jaemin is crying, silently bearing his soul to you and showing you a different kind of vulnerability.

unspoken words, and soft touches.

maybe that’s all you will ever be.

you wipe away his tears, “i’m sorry.”

jaemin feels broken at the apology you speak to him. he feels anger start to seep within him, and he wants to shout and scream and let loose. he was tired of feeling so trapped and stuck, and you could have been his only hope. you might have been. but who’s to say it would be a good thing to get out? maybe he was terrified to come out of what he knew best, of what he was comfortable with now. everything felt like pure torture. actual, unadulterated pain.

“no,” jaemin replies, swatting your hand away gently, “i’m sorry.”

“stop, it’s okay. sometimes we just don’t know what we want, and i shouldn’t put that kind of pressure on you.”

guilt. absolute guilt.

it sinks within his bones, and buries him alive. jaemin knows what he wants. he does. he knows he wants you, but he also knows what he wants is what he can’t have. but jaemin says nothing, and lets the air fall into a tense silence that starts to ring in his head. he can hear the dull air. it’s loud, deafening almost. and it tears him apart, because he knows he could possibly fix your broken conscience and tell you everything. but he doesn’t.

he stays quiet.

jaemin remembers leaving your apartment after that. he also remembers your short, lively memories that the two of you created within the past five months. the soft, gentle memories wash over him in silent hope and cause light to flitter through his body. he feels alive thinking of you. selfishly alive.

you were stuck thinking of jaemin all night after. it felt like a fight, but it also didn’t. you wouldn’t exactly consider it a fight, or anything. but, why did it hurt so bad? why did you feel the ache in your chest? why was your heart beating faster than usual?

you press a palm flat to your chest, trying to soothe the pain and slow your heart. thinking of jaemin alone was starting to eat you alive. you felt obsessed, all over the place and only thinking of jaemin. it would always track back down to jaemin, you noticed. and it was a terrifying experience to learn that you were beginning to feel stronger and stronger towards him as the days passed.

maybe that’s why it hurt so much.

you cared more than you were willing to admit.

“you better have a good explanation as to why the fuck you’ve been avoiding me.”

renjun’s voice echoes through your mind, but that’s all he really seems to be to you right now. a voice. you unintentionally ignored renjun’s calls and texts over the course of three days. jaemin hadn’t text, nor visited, within those three days since the altercation. it tore you apart, prompting you into not responding to anyone and isolating yourself more than you would like to. feelings felt so complicating. you were bouncing from one conclusion to the next, never really settling on something you could exactly seem to agree with. you would bounce from being angry, to being frustrated, to shedding tears, to feeling sad, all for it to cycle again and be put on repeat. a horrible cycle, at that.

renjun became worried when you didn’t answer his texts like you usually do. he figured maybe you needed space and time. maybe something happened. and he was right, something did happen. but you not responding for three days straight got to him, finally making way to your apartment on his own. renjun cares, you know he does. and maybe locking him out of your inner world shouldn’t have been the solution to all your problems, but you seemed to have locked everyone and everything out. wallowing in your own self-pity day and night.

you had become accustomed to going through the motions within those three days, making sure to give yourself the proper nutrients you needed in order to stay alive. but nothing felt exact and alive anymore. it tore you apart, bit by bit. piece by piece.

you say nothing as renjun storms in your room, catching you laying in bed while staring at the ceiling. renjun stops the anger bubbling in his throat to catch a real look at you, and his own heart starts to ache. it’s like he can feel what you feel, and it wasn’t good.

and he knows.

without you saying anything, he knows.

maybe that’s why you and renjun got along so well. neither of you needed to say what was wrong once one of you had taken a good look at the other. it was an unspoken understanding of one another, something you can’t exactly find anywhere else, within anyone else.

you remember renjun holding you that night as you cried deep into his shirt, possibly staining it with your tears from how much you let out that night. it was different. renjun had never seen you like this before in all the years he had known you, and he could feel his heart breaking for you. he feels the way you desperately claw at his chest, letting out these putrid sobs that ring so loudly, he’s sure even jaemin could probably hear it. he hoped you weren’t thinking too much of him, but he knew that wasn’t true. never would that ever be true.

when a week passes since the incident, you feel lighter. you thought you would never speak to him again, despite him being your neighbor. you knew you could always call, text. but so could he. it didn’t feel like your choice to make. you didn’t know what he wanted, and if he didn’t want you... why would you chase him down? it never felt like your call to make. it was his.

renjun holds you when you fall face first, and you let him. he comforts you on your worst nights, and you confide in him for as long as he’ll let you. which is forever. renjun will let you forever.

you’re alone tonight, letting out a soft sigh while trying to be content. when you hear a ring on your phone, you don’t hesitate to pick up, already knowing it’s going to be renjun checking in on you.

“hello?” you greet first, expecting a soft, gentle voice to be on the other line greeting you with a cheery tone.

“y/n.” it’s not renjun. and you can feel your palms start to sweat at the voice, making you more anxious than you can amount to. you feel dread wash over you in just a split second when you come to realize that you’re talking to jaemin.

jaemin isn’t sure why he called. maybe he shouldn’t have. he probably should have just let the situation die down and never resurface. so why the hell did he call? why was his body aching just to see you, feel you, hear you one more time? he screwed up. he could have done this sooner, so much sooner. this could’ve been solved head-on days ago, a whole entire week ago even.

so, why was he calling now?

“can you..” he pauses, swallowing thick air as he feels a lump in his throat begin to form, “can you speak to me? talk to me.” he likes listening to you. he wants to hear your voice, listen to the way you talk mindlessly about things that probably don’t matter, but at the same time do matter because they’re coming from you. he misses the way your voice enraptures him and takes a hold on him, not letting him go for the rest of the night.

he’s being selfish again.

“what the hell..” you whisper, hurt laced in your voice and pain etching every syllable, “no.”

“n-no?”

“no.” you’re stern, spitting back at him and feeling anger start to rise, “who the hell do you think you are? calling me a week fucking later and asking for me to talk to you? i gave you a week, jaemin. a whole entire week to speak to me, and you didn’t.”

“i missed your voice.” he blurts, “i’m selfish. i’ve been more selfish than i’ve ever been in my whole entire life with you.” he can sense you’re about to reply, but doesn’t let you. not yet. “i process how i feel too late. i take things for granted, and i push them away just when things start to get good. i’ve always been that way. i have no excuse for my actions. i want you to be different, trust me when i say that i really, really do..” he gulps, and he can hear himself starting to talk faster than usual again. “i just don’t think it works for me that way.”

“why? why not?” you question immediately, and jaemin expects it.

it’s silent on the other line for longer than you would have liked it to be, “do you remember the first time i kissed you?”

you want to scold him for the subject change, but don’t. “yes.”

“i had never felt more alive than i did there.” jaemin says in a quiet voice sounding of soft, pondering thoughts. “it felt like i had a fresh, new beginning kissing you. i lived in a dream world around you. i lived in my head.”

it’s quiet for a few moments. you can hear him breathing on the other line, and it makes you wonder what he’s thinking.

“...and i think that’s the problem.”

you feel yourself starting to shatter. tears were starting to spill, and you were almost embarrassed of yourself for letting yourself cry like this again. especially while on the phone with jaemin.

jaemin feels his own breath starting to tremble as he sits alone in his apartment, the one across from yours. at any moment he could walk over and see you. but maybe it was a dangerous line to cross right now. maybe this was what was best for the both of you.

“i can’t keep living in my head. it’s dangerous, it’s scary.”

jaemin jumps when he hears a knock on his door. it’s you, isn’t it? he wants to say he hesitated when he answered the door, but he doesn’t seem to have any self control when it comes to you. he opens the door to see you holding the phone to your ear, just to watch you hang up the line and place your phone in your sweatpants pocket. he does the same.

“i live in my own head, too.” you say it with ease, but he can feel how bitter you are when you start to clench and unclench your jaw. “you’re not the only one. and i don’t expect you to just magically let me in, i never said that. it just sucks when after i’ve tried everything, done everything, you still push me away like i was nothing.. a whole entire week, and you said nothing. i tore myself apart for you. i tore myself apart because of you.”

he never wanted to be that for you. when jaemin started talking to you, he never expected it to get this far. he never thought things through when it came to you, no matter how much he may have lived inside his head. no matter how long he would overthink things for, he still ended up choosing the selfish road.

“i’m scared..” jaemin starts. and it’s obvious he’s holding everything in to not fall apart. “i’m scared that, once i let myself go, i’ll lose everything i worked so hard to get towards. you became apart of my life in such a short amount of time. it was so quick, it scared me. it still scares me.” he isn’t lying. he isn’t lying. he isn’t lying. “i just..” let it out. let it fucking out.

“just what?”

he can’t.

he holds it in, letting out a deep breath instead.

“i just don’t want to miss you. i don’t want to miss what i could have.” he’s being honest, completely honest.

maybe you should’ve talked more than that, but you opted out on just kissing him instead. it was raw, and intense. it wasn’t graceful or slowed. it was rushed and harsh, something you weren’t used to when it came to jaemin. you could feel him pouring his emotions out as he kissed you with fervor, and he could taste the pain and anger on your lips as you tangled your hands in his dark strands of hair. your body warming up to him, his own reacting to you in ways he couldn’t seem to remember since he last time he kissed you. pain was seeping through your soul, and into his.

when you pull apart, you have tears running down your cheeks and furrowed eyebrows. even when you’re angry crying, jaemin still becomes more enamored with you in all ways possible. it’s sickening, really. sends a nervous feeling in his stomach the longer he looks at you, the more he studies you.

“i’m here, though.” you finally reply, a choked sob breaking the sentence. “i’m right here.”

you are. and it’s painfully true that you, in fact, right here.

“but i’m not.”

silence.

complete silence.

you knew what he meant. no matter how much he may have physically been there in front of you, he was not there mentally. and you figured that he was unsure if he ever would be. it’s painful, it’s so damn painful. and it rips you apart and tears you a new one. nothing really compared to this, in all honesty. not this type of pain. not this type of hurt.

“are you calling it quits?” you ask suddenly, and it sends a stake right through jaemin’s heart. not in a million years would he ever want to let go of you, or what you had.

jaemin is incredibly tired. he’s tired of hurting you to no end and creating memory after memory, just until he knows when he has to leave. he can only really imagine how you feel right now. not knowing at all why he’s doing this to you. why he’s hurting you so much. he doesn’t want to be that for you. he really, really doesn’t.

jaemin kisses you first this time, instead of answering you. maybe he should have answered you. but it seemed to be poor choice after poor choice when it came to him. you couldn’t find it in yourself to back away, to demand an answer. you didn’t think you really wanted one, anyway. you weren’t prepared. you didn’t think you could ever be prepared for his answer, even if it was the one you wanted it to be. you weren’t really sure what that answer was either.

so you let him kiss you, and you kiss him back. because you’re unsure, and you know he’s just as unsure as you are. maybe even more unsure than you. and kissing him seems to burn you alive, but you let it. you keep letting it.

one more memory to add to the book.

one more time you feel yourself fall deeper into jaemin.

waking, you feel your limbs ache. you can hear the soft raining patting against your window already so early in the morning. instead of birds chirping, it’s rain hitting lightly at your windowpane. you get up to open the curtains, taking sight of the trails of trees in front of you. jaemin was right when he said this place was a bit away from the busy atmosphere, and you appreciated the gentle quietness you got to experience on days like these. it was calming, and you didn’t feel rushed back into reality for the time being. it was just you, no one else.

you jump in shock when you hear your front door opening and closing, “holy fuck.”

renjun comes into view with a frantic look on his face, “y/n-”

“i should really revoke your key to my apartment-” you let out a lighthearted chuckle.

“i think jaemin’s gone.” cold.

it was cold.

you were freezing, but jaemin had already insisted on going to the park at such a late hour, “you’re not going to, like, kill me, right?” you sound shaky, but it was only from the cold.

jaemin rolls his eyes, giving you a sweet laugh that lights you up, “no, i’m not. but i guess that’s what all killers say.”

“touché.” you huff, and you can see your breath in the cold air, “jaemin, it’s freezing, why the fuck are we at a park?”

he places himself on a swing, “come sit.”

you pause, before making way to where he’s sat on his own swing. it’s silent, and you can hear the wind in your ears. you can feel the cold on your fingertips. you can taste the winter on your tongue. sitting in the comfortable silence with jaemin wasn’t a bad thing. you actually enjoyed just simply being around him, but why were you out in the cold? so late?

“i go to parks, on swings, late at night when i want to think. when i want to clear my head.” jaemin starts, “i’m in my head a lot. i overthink everything, and i tend to exhaust myself more than i can handle. i’m sure that’s not the first thing you think of when you see me, huh?” jaemin gives you a quick glance, amusement on his pretty features.

you look at him with a certain type of patience that makes jaemin feel warm and safe inside. it’s almost overwhelming, in a sense. but it drips with honey and creates a foundation in his heart that he’s sure he won’t be able to get rid of. he likes it, he likes it a lot.

“i’m not myself.” he states, and it feels solemn. “i’m not who i’m supposed to be, yet. and i think it tears me apart in the worst ways. i can see it, i can feel it, taste it even.” he pauses, feeling along the chains of the swing absentmindedly, “but i’m not there yet. i can’t become it, no matter how much i imagine it.” jaemin lets silence sink in, before continuing with a soft tone that breaks both you and him apart. “you would think that, if i wanted it so bad, if i wanted it enough, it would be here by now. i would already be who i’m supposed to be.”

his words cut through you in ways you can’t describe, and all you can really do is listen.

“i think i have a lot of learning, and unlearning to do.” jaemin says this with his whole chest, and you know he means it. “i’ve only really known you for five months, and we’ve already had two arguments, but i wouldn’t have wanted to share these memories with anyone else.”

“i mean that.”

“gone..?”

reality hits you full force before you can realize what’s happening. it’s painful, it’s heartbreaking, and you’re being dumped into an ocean of cold water before you can even process how you’re truly feeling. it’s like getting your heart torn out. it’s like not knowing where you’re going to end up next, because it doesn’t feel like there is going to be a next. your bones are soaking in pain, swallowing you whole and making sure you feel every inch of it.

renjun hands you a note wordlessly, it has your name written on it in pretty handwriting, and you’re cursing him already for having good handwriting. “it was on his own door. i tried knocking, but there was no answer. went to the lobby and they said he moved out just a few hours ago.”

you sink. you crash and burn and sink and drown. falling back onto the edge of your bed, staring wildly at the letter in your hands. you watch as tears start to soak up the paper while you hastily take out the ink covered note.

“y/n.

i can’t say i’m good with confrontation, because then that would just be a plain lie. but i think we’ve gone past lies at this point. believe me when i say i thought of telling you that i was temporary, that i knew i had to leave at some point. you were such a light for me, a breath of fresh air. you brought me out of a dark hole i had been living in for way too long. but, if i had stayed any longer, i would have dragged you down with me in the end. i don’t want you to say that you would have been able to handle it, or that you wished i had stayed. i can’t. i couldn’t have. i can’t be the person anymore who hurts you and leaves a lingering ghost around your head. i don’t want to be the person who stains you any more than i already have. maybe i’m doing exactly what i don’t want to be for you right now. but, if i had stayed, i wouldn’t have been able to be with you in the way you deserve. i had to leave. i was on a journey to find myself, and i found you along the way. i thought, maybe, you could help me out of whatever sinkhole i’m in. maybe you were the cure to it. i soon realized that it wasn’t you who should do the saving. i need to save myself, i need to be my own hero for once. this might stick in your mind forever, but i promise it was never about you. i really, really liked you. more than i can really handle while feeling like this. i could even feel myself falling for you along the way. but i think, before i even consider that, i need to fall in love with myself first. you helped me begin a new path, and helped me realize that there are things to love and look forward to in life. and i need to figure out how to use that in the real world. i need to figure out how to use that on myself.

i’m sorry i never said anything sooner. i should have. thank you for helping me find a part of myself in the journey of finding out who i’m supposed to be. i’ll never forget you, ever.

- jaemin.

you want to be mad. you want to curse at him and scream and cry at the top of your lungs. but all you can do is shed bittersweet tears and sink and drown and fall. you so, so fucking much wanted to be pissed. you wanted to be livid. but you weren’t. and you felt slightly bitter that you weren’t. you could only cry as sour and sweet started to mix within you and make you remember every single memory and detail jaemin gave you before leaving.

so much, yet so little.

“i’m sorry, y/n.” renjun’s voice echoes in your head, and he no longer feels like just a voice to you. he’s actually there, and you appreciate him so damn much.

“don’t be.” you wipe away your tears just for new ones to fall right after. you let yourself feel pain, you didn’t shy away from it and you didn’t stop yourself from falling part. how would you heal if you didn’t know pain first?

you let out a long, long shaky sigh, “you know, i almost fell in love with him.” you admit this with your heart on you sleeve and renjun listens to you with attending ears. “i was so, so close to just.. giving it all up for him.”

renjun slips in the seat beside you on the edge of your bed, pulling you into his embrace. you accept it, much like all the other times he had held you. it was warm, and he smelled like his normal self. nothing about renjun was unfamiliar, nothing about this felt unsafe or unsure. renjun would always be there, and you couldn’t thank him enough as you loudly cried into his shirt out of sorrow.

deep, deep sorrow.

“have you ever had a love that’s bigger than you?”

your quick answer, no. you haven’t.

but you were pretty damn close with jaemin.

so, so damn close.

and that’s all you’ll have with him.

unspoken words, and soft touches.

a/n: hi ! thank you so much denise for having me on this collab, and thank you everyone who read it! please make sure to check out everyone else’s works as well if you haven’t ! the link of the collab is at the very top underneath the title. :] i like to think this truly was a montage of love, because not all love is beautiful or ends sweetly. bittersweet endings are painful, but they help you grow as a person. i hope everyone gets what i mean haha ANYWAY ! thank you again :] please remember to take care and stay healthy as always.

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msmarvelwrites · 3 years

Text

Almost Is Never Enough

Summary: Ever since Steve had come out of the ice all those years ago, his only goal had been to get back to Peggy Carter. A home that was waiting and forgetting him all at once. But that doesn't make it any easier to watch him go.

Pairing: Steve x reader

Warnings: Angst, angst, just a little bit of angst, fluff, language.

Word Count: 2.4k

Authors Note: Thank you to the wonderful @remmiesour for this request. It’s been a decade, but I finally got around to it! I’ve never written for Steve and honestly I didn't think I ever would but, famous last words I guess! Enjoy!

Ever since Steve had come out of the ice all those years ago, his only goal had been to get back to her. A home that was waiting and forgetting him all at once. She was there, and if it was the last thing he did, he would be too.

So, when the opportunity presented itself, when he could actually find his long lost love, you already knew he had made the decision before the words fell from his lips.

You knew. But god, that didn't make it any easier.

You hadn’t meant for it to happen, falling in love with the world's most unavailable man. In every sense of the word, it was an accident.

And yet, there you stood, eyes trained on his face as he laughed with his friends. The sound ripping through you like it always did. For the past week you had been trying to memorize the sound. The way it filled the room, pulling smiles from everyone who heard it.

You hadn’t meant to fall in love with Steve Rogers, but that is exactly what you did.

“Ya know,” Bucky’s gravely voice started behind you, pulling your attention away from Steve and towards his friend. “If you're planning on telling him, I’d do it now.”

You furrowed your brow at the brunette, a false confusion clouding your eyes. You shook your head, only pulling a scoff from his stubble framed lips.

“Don’t play that with me. I see the way you look at him.” He smiled softly, watching as your eyes flicked back to the godlike man.

Bucky was only trying to help. But in your case, you were just too late. You had your moment. Several if you were being honest. Steve deserved someone who wasn't afraid to tell him how they felt. Someone strong and brave.

Someone like Peggy Carter.

“I missed my chance.” You hummed, taking a sip from the bottle of stale beer in your hand. You grimised at the bitterness, the liquid courage doing nothing for your spirit. Only serving as a half assed reminder of what a coward you really were.

How many times had those three words almost fallen from your mouth? How many moments passed- longing stares and lingering touches? Surely too many to keep count. But it didn't change the truth.

He didn't love you, and he was leaving.

“I think that he deserves to know what he’s leaving behind.” Bucky whispers against your ear, the words pulling at your heart.

Only you and he knew the truth. Today was not a celebration of wins… It was a send off.

“He deserves to be happy.” You choked out, your eyes meeting Steves from across the room, his softening when he was your hollow form. You faked a smile, though it didn't fool the Captain as he began to make his way over to you.

“And what about you?” You snapped your head to meet Bucky, your eyes serious and tone stern.

“Stop it. Please.”

Bucky raised his hands in surrender, taking a step back as Steve approached you. His voice calling your name melted over you like honey in tea. So sweet, but always ready to burn if not careful.

You met his gaze, his blue eyes sparkling down at you, inviting you in. You could drown in the oceans of his iris, in fact, you had on many occasions. Tonight was no exception.

“Could I steal you away for a moment?” He asked, his voice cutting through your thoughts, coated in kindness.

The moment his eyes met yours, you were a goner. A mess from the second he said your name. It was pathetic, but then again, isn’t that what you were? Doomed from the first day he walked into your life, taking up every thought in your head.

“Of course.” You tried to smile, forcing it on your quivering lips. You hoped Steve didn’t notice, and of course, he didn’t. He never noticed. If he had, perhaps you wouldn’t be in this mess.

Steve pulled you along, hand in hand as he led your outside into the night. Darkness acting as a veil covering your hurt. Part of you wanted to scream. Needed it. Though, it wouldn’t do much now.

“Do you remember when we first met?” His question echoed around you, pulling you to the memory of your first encounter.

Of course you remembered. It replayed in your head like a broken record every night. A thousand ‘what if’s’ swirling around the memory.

The day he asked you to dance at one of Tony’s elaborate fundraisers for charity. He was like something out of a dream, the way he walked across that dance floor to you. The way his voice asked that daunting question. The way you swooned the moment his hands touched yours, pulling you in and spinning you around the room.

It all felt so distant now. As if you had made the entire thing up in your head.

Sometimes you wish you had.

“I remember you being a terrible dancer.” You joked, worrying on your bottom lip as Steve's laugh echoed around you.

“See, that's the problem. I don’t have much practice and I owe a dame a dance.” His words were sincere and yet dripped in venom. They cut you deep, poison darting straight to your heart.

“You want me to help you… Dance?” You tried not to let your face show how truly hollow you felt.

You had to force yourself not to cringe away when he took your hand, pulling you gently against his chest. You could have died right there, drowned in your own self loathing, overcome with jealousy for a woman who, at this very moment, was nothing more than a tombstone. She was gone, nothing but a memory and still- Steve picked her.

With a broken breath, you rested your hand on his shoulder, shivering at his touch. You should pull away, save yourself from the ache. But the way he held you- gently and with a foreign love you would never feel from Steve, your body stayed. You had wondered what it would be like. Wrapped up in his arms, your name on his mouth, his lips on your throat. You had imagined it more times than you cared to admit.

One dance couldn't hurt.

You let him take the lead, swaying you slowly into the night. His hand on your waist, guiding you to a silent melody.

“Ya know, there was a moment that I thought it might be us.” His words whispered against your neck, freezing you in time. You swore your veins turned to ice at the cruelty of his remark. All you could do was gape.

Steve pulled away to look at you, watching your face turn pale and eyes fill with tears.

“How could you- This is a bad idea. I can’t do this, Steve.” You choked out, horrified at how little your voice sounded. You hated how he made you feel, small and broken. If you were, it was only because he made you that way.

“I didn't mean to-”

“Didn't you? I respect myself too much to beg you to stay. But what the fuck, Steve? How can you stand there, one foot out the door and tell me that?” You were shattered, hand over your heart as if it might fall out at any moment. “I’ve followed you around like you were the sun. I’d do anything for you. But I won’t watch you walk away. Not when all that’s waiting for you is a ghost. I love you too much, and it breaks my heart that you can’t even consider that I could… That I might…”

“Y/n, baby, I’m so sorry. I just-” Your name fell from his lips like a plea, but you couldn't stand there and listen to him try to mend what was already so irreversibly broken.

“No- Just stop.” You blurted, turning away and pulling yourself from his grasp. “I’ve been second to her my whole life. I’m numb to it now. But don’t make excuses for your shitty decision. If you want to go, go.” With that, you pushed away from him, heading back to the party and away from the man who, come tomorrow, would be forever out of reach.

The next morning you woke up, eyes burning from the tears shed the night before and chest heavy with guilt.

Part of you knew there was a better way to say the things you did, but another part reveled in your cruelty. Basked in how dumbstruck Steve looked standing on the lawn. Maybe it was mean, but so was he.

It wouldn't matter for long. The afternoon sun was creeping in and soon he would be gone. Nothing but a distorted memory of a man you used to love. But at least he knew. At least when he laid beside his consolation prize he would remember you. Maybe he would hurt. You cringed at the idea.

No matter how much you wanted to hate Steve, your heart simply wouldn't allow it. That was the worst joke of all. You despised the man you loved.

Buck: He’s waiting for you…

You looked down at your phone on the bedside table, wiping away the tear that rolled down your cheek. You knew it was time. This was the moment that you had prepared for. But you made a promise last night- one you were far too petty to fall back on now.

Though even still, as the seconds lulled by, guilt began to eat away at your brain and before you knew it you were half way out the door. Your feet dragged you down the hall, forcing you to confront the horrible truth.

You knew he was gone before Bucky even spoke the words. His eyes filled with a sadness only you could know. Shoulders slumped as he struggled to hold his gaze. He shook his head, affirming your worst fears as Sam’s panicked voice broke through the tension.

“Get him back here!” He shouted, his tone filled with dread. It was torture to watch, unberable to feel.

A loud crackle erupted through the air almost knocking you off your feet. Through the piercing white flash, you saw a figure. If you didn't know any better you would have thought-

There, in all of his glory, was Steve Rogers. Perfect and untouched. Like a statue carved from marble.

All you could do was gape, hand over mouth as he stepped down the tarmac, a smile that could instill world peace plastered on his pink lips. Your whole body vibrated with nerves. Somewhere between anger and hope.

Your name fell from his lips, but you couldn't hear it over the hammering of your heart, your feet already carrying you across the field.

“What the hell are you-”

“It’s you, doll.” He beamed, his words only fueling a rage that was threatening to boil over the closer you got. “It’s always been you. I can't believe I didn't see it until-”

Your fist colliding with his stoney jaw cut him off before he could finish. You pushed against his, palms thrashing at his chest as he tried to fend you off. Of course, he could if he truly wanted to, you knew this.

“Y/n, just listen to me.” He begged, holding your wrists tight as you went to take another hit. You tried to yank yourself away from him, but it was no use. “I was stupid, doll. A complete idiot and I didnt see what was right in front of me. Tell me it’s not too late. Tell me I still have a chance.” Steve's eyes brimmed with tears as your heart thundered in your chest.

You could only blink, your mind racing between a thousand reasons to walk away. To close the chapter on your love with Steve for good. So why did you stay? As if it wasn't torture enough. As if he hadn't beaten your heart black and blue with his carelessness. You wanted to run, but amidst the broken shards of your heart was a naive girl desperate with hope. And so, with a half step, you closed the distance, taking the deadly plunge as your lips collided with his.

Steve drank you in, his mouth moulding to yours the instant you met. His hands wrapping around your waist and pulling you in until you arched back against him. Nothing in the world could have prepared you for how completely and irrevocably intoxicating he was. His presence over you melting you into a puddle before him.

Steve's tongue gently ran across your bottom lip pulling a gutteral shutter to wrack through your body. The taste of him permanently cemented into your mouth. It was the soft moan that escaped the back of his throat that finally did you in, buckling your knees as you held onto the soldier for dear life.

It wasn't until Sam’s voice echoed around you that you finally pulled away from Steve. Your body’s untwining as the rest of the world came back into focus.

“Does anyone want to tell me what the hell is going on? What is she talking about?” Sam shouted, pointing his finger at you exasperatingly.

“I- I… I don't…” Your words fell to the back of your throat, the memory of Steve’s lips ingrained in your skin. You couldn't think, much less form a coherent sentence as he looked down at you, that boyish grin plastered on his mouth. The way his eyes sparkled, tears filled with a longing you had seen many times, but never from him.

“Were you not coming back?!” Sam blurted abruptly causing Steve to snap his head in the falcons direction.

“No.” Steve spoke simply, his gaze returning to you. Eyes filled with an answer you had been wracking your brain for. “I could never leave my best girl.”

You scoffed, your gaze only leaving Steve’s for a moment. His words were kind, his lips intoxicating. But there was a nagging in your heart, pulling you from your dreamstate and back to reality.

“Best girl, huh?” You signed, leaning into him as you chased his touch. “I think I’m going to need you to prove that, Rogers.”

Steve chuckled, the low rumble vibrating through your chest. His smile seemed brighter than you’d ever seen, reassuring you that this was the only place he wanted to be. “For as long as I can, darling.”

#steve x reader #steve rodgers x reader #steve rogers #steve rodgers imagine #steve rogers x reader #steve rogers x you #dark!steve rogers x reader #steve rogers x female reader

559 notes · View notes

koos-euphoria · 3 years

Text

ᴍɪɴᴇ | ʏᴏᴏɴɢɪ ғᴛ sᴇᴏᴋᴊɪɴ

yoongi/reader ft seokjin | s | 18+ | actor!au | oneshot

wordcount: 5.4K

requested: yes

warnings: Dom!Yoongi, Sub!fem reader, hair pulling, teasing, fingering, dirty talk, pussy eating, throat fucking, possessive!Yoongi, degradation, praising, finger sucking, spanking, choking

— summary: you have to kiss seokjin in a drama, that you star in for the next episode of their reality tv show run bts! yoongi becomes possessive of his girl. So he reacts by showing that you are his, that is by making Seokjin watch him fuck you.

note: yeah.. this is just filled with filth sksksk

ᴍᴀɪɴ ᴍ.ʟɪsᴛ | ʙᴛs ᴍ.ʟɪsᴛ

The camera lens zooms into yours and Seokjin’s face, preparing to shoot. Your eyes running over the script in a hurry to memorise your next lines for the scene that’s about to happen. You feel a makeup sponge bounce on your cheeks delicately as the makeup artist touches up the subtle blush that she’s created. “Okay guys, we be starting the last scene for this run episode in a minute!” The director calls from behind the set. The rest of the boys crowding silently around him wanting to witness the ‘best scene in the whole script’ that is quoted from the director himself. You and Seokjin both give your scripts to one of the staff team as you get in your places, giving one another a small smile before getting into your characters. “Okay guys, in three.. two... one.. ACTION!” The director shouts and you hear a click for somewhere behind the camera.

Rain begins to pour down on both of you as you stare at the man in front of you. “You can’t just leave me y/n, not like this. I need you.” Seokjin stammers, his voice unstable, as he tries to hold back the need to cry. “If you needed me, then I wouldn’t of just seen you with her!” You shout back, your fists clenching by your side as the image that you saw not even five minutes before. The imagine of Seokjin smiling with his ex, as she holds flowers in her hands enters your mind. Your eyes fall shut, as if attempting to erase the picture, the sight of it bringing you so much pain. Oh how it hurts your heart. “It wasn’t what you think! Please... y/n just, let me explain.” Seokjin begs, no longer being able to hold back his sadness, tears freely flowing down his pretty face. As you take deep breath, your own tears begin to fall, one after another. Slowly opening your eyes, you look up at him and take another deep breath. God, you hate seeing him cry. “You have two minutes.” You tell him gently, though it wasn’t a whisper, it is all you could manage, however, your voice to unstable for anything more. Seokjin’s eyes widen slightly, before he scrambles for his words, stuttering. “I b-bumped into her, she already had t-those flowers, she just got back from seeing her boyfriend. Those were not from me, I’d...” Seokjin pauses to take a deep breath, clenching his fists in an attempt to steady his trembling hands. “I don’t love her y/n, she’s just.. she’s not the one I want. Or who I want to be with. That person, she is just someone I used to know.” Seokjin explains, eyes frantically looking everywhere he can see. Scanning across your face, searching for any negative reaction from you. You space out as you take in his words, eyebrows coming into a frown, lips pouting as you become confused. “You.. you don’t love her?” You question, quietly, as you take a small step forward, closer to Seokjin, your hands still clenched by your sides, cautious. Automatically Seokjin erratically shakes his head from side to side, taking his own step closer to you, so close his breath fans over your face, creating some sort of heat that dances along your cheeks. His hand comes up to gently caress your cheek, thumb running along the soft skin. “No. I don’t. She’s not the one I love.” He confirms, your eyes flicker between his eyes and lips. The rain continues to pour down on the pair of you, even as the tears cease, a chill running down your spine as your clothes begin to soak through. Seokjin’s hair sticks to his forehead, as his eyes copy yours, flickering across your face. “Then who?” You whisper, raising a hand to lay on his chest, your breath is felt on Seokjin’s lips and you could almost hear the hitch in his breath. “You. It’s always been you.” He whispers back. Right before he finally closes the gap between you, his free arm slithering around your waist to pull your body against his own. His pillowy soft lips pressing against yours. The kiss full of raw passion. The emotion of pure love. It steals your breath away. The kiss only lasted for about 6 seconds, but it almost felt like a whole minute. Seokjin pulls away first, out of breath, you both pant as he presses his wet forehead on your own, looking into your eyes, neither of you are able to hold back the goofy smiles that spread across your faces. “I love you too.” You whisper to Seokjin.

“and CUT! Well done guys that was great!” The director praises you both enthusiastically, arms wide before he gives you a pat on the back once he’s in front of you. “Thanks!” Seokjin and you both beam. The boys were quick to steal the pair of you away as the director runs to talk to one of the other staff members. “Damn, I was about to cry myself!” Hoseok exclaims as he wipes away a fake tear from his cheek. “Right? It was so beautiful!” Jungkook’s quick to agree with his Hyung, bouncing on the balls of his feet excitedly. “I wanna kiss y/n! You’re lucky Hyung!” Jimin winks at you, a smirk playing on his full lips, making your cheeks flush pink. “Oh me too!” Taehyung chimes in, nodding his head, his dark hair flopping in front of his eyes. “You did great guys.” Namjoon smiles, dimples popping out on his cheeks, his hands stuffed in his pockets. He smiles again as he ignores the other boys comments. You look over at Yoongi, waiting to hear what he thinks, but you find him practically sending Jin to an early grave. The elder coughs awkwardly, windshield like laugh floods the room. “C’mon guys, let get you changed before you catch a cold.” A female staff cheers, you see Jin physically relax as she begins pushing you both away from the boys and towards the changing rooms. Side by side, you and Seokjin joke on the way there, before splitting apart to go into different rooms so you can get changed.

As you take a step out the door, humming happily to yourself freshly changed into dry clothes, you bump into something sturdy, catching you off guard. “Oh!” You shout in fright, not expecting anyone to be there. Your head tilts up to find Yoongi staring harshly back down at you, arms crossed over his chest. Your eyebrows scrunch up worriedly. “Is everything okay Yoongs?” You ask, your hand moving to gently brush the stray strand of hair that is covering his beautiful dark eyes. You see his features soften slightly, a small pout appearing. Cute. “Mmm.” He hums absentmindedly, rolling his eyes, before he grips onto your wrist in time for it to be slowly pulling away. “Come.” He demands, his voice deep and raspy, the harsh look back on his face before he is turning away from you and walking down the long corridor, leaving no room for you to argue.

You practically jog to keep up with a pissed off Yoongi, or what you’re guessing is a pissed off Yoongi, if the clenched jaw and dark eyes are anything to go by. The grip that he has on your wrist isn’t tight but it is enough to have your heart racing inside your chest, and trip over your own two feet. Yoongi pulls you away from the changing room you were just in and past many doors that you don’t have the chance of even looking at, room by room going past you both like a blur. Yoongi comes to a sudden halt, making you awkwardly face plant into his back. “Where are we going Yoongi?” You ask, your voice soft and delicate to his ears, your hand that isn’t occupied in his grasp moves to gently lay on the middle of his back, fingers tips spread apart, pushing lightly to create a bit of distance between you, as you step backwards. His head is turns towards you without a second thought, his chest tightening at how cute you look. Eyes wide like a little dear caught in headlights with a faint blush dusting along the apples of your cheeks, but still. It doesn’t change anything. He’s still pissed. As the quick flicker of the soft emotions appeared, they are gone just as fast. His dark eyes look down at you, almost scarily, causing goosebumps to rise on your skin. The irises expanding, now almost pitch black of colour are practically sending you six feet underground, right then and there. You curse to yourself inside your head as your heartbeat quickens, from nervousness and excitement, but also worry. What’s gotten him so mad?

Moving his whole body, he faces you completely now, his free hand that isn’t wrapped around your wrist, moves to grip your chin, fingers curling around the feature forcing you to look directly at him. “Did you enjoy that kiss?” Yoongi asks, voice low, raspy. It sends a chill down your spine as he completely ignores your question. Your eyes widen as your lips part at the sudden question. You’d be lying if you said you didn’t enjoy it, who wouldn’t enjoy kissing the worldwide handsome Jin? Obviously someone who isn’t sane. Waiting impatiently, Yoongi’s tongue comes into your view as the wet muscle licks the corner of his mouth, making your thighs clench involuntary. Noticing the subtle motion, the corner of Yoongi’s mouth twitches slightly as if holding back a smirk. He runs his tongue along the rest of his plush bottom lip, his eyes raking over your body top to bottom, checking you out. His bottom lip now glistening with saliva before a deep growl rumbles from the man in front of you. His left eyebrow raises once you move your eyes back into his. “Y-yes, I did.” You stutter, your fingers twitching as you fidget nervously, already knowing he’s not gonna like your answer. Your cheeks flush red as you watch Yoongi’s eyes turn even darker, narrowing at you. Whizzing back around after dropping his grip on your chin, Yoongi grasps the door handle with his now free hand, almost aggressively, proceeding to push the wooden door open after a loud click echos through the empty hallway. Moving himself into the room, his fingers instantly find the light switch, flicking it so the room is suddenly bright, almost blindingly so. A swift tug to your wrist, is all that Yoongi gives you to have you stumbling into his chest, grasping the soft material of his shirt between your fingers, as he pushes the door shut behind you.

Before you even have the time to remove your hands from him and flatten the new crinkles that you’ve made in Yoongi’s shirt, he looks down at you, one hand coming under your chin again, gripping it as he silently pulls you up straight. You suddenly gasp as you feel your back roughly hitting the door behind you. His other hand suddenly leaves your wrist and finds its way in your hair gripping at the roots. The feeling has your pussy clenching, a whimper falling from your parted lips. Yoongi ducks his head down causing your breath to catch in your throat. It was almost overwhelming how little he’s doing with how much it’s affecting you. The feeling of Yoongi’s lips trailing along your exposed collarbone renders you speechless, as his warm breath ghosts along the skin forcing goosebumps to rise, it makes him smirk. Oh how he loves just how easy it is to get reactions from you. So sensitive. Humming, he trails his feather-light touches of his lips along your neck, stopping once he reaches the part just below your ear as that has your fingers tightening in his shirt, crumpling it further. His teeth nip at the flesh and you keen, moaning, your knees buckle weakly. Yoongi chuckles darkly as he licks and kisses the sensitive spot before he decides to mark it, sucking on the skin. When he pulls away you see him slightly nod in approval, when he sees the fresh purple colour it’s turned to. Ducking back down he nips again, this time at your lobe, and your eyes instinctively shut, lashes tickling the tops of your cheeks as they flutter. You can feel the material of your underwear sticking your folds, as you get more worked up at Yoongi’s hot mouth. Yoongi gives a small tug on your roots, making you mewl. “Look at you. So responsive and I’ve barely even done anything.” Another tug to your roots, this time harsher as he forces your head back, making it slightly thud against the door, but you couldn’t care less as the pain only adds fuel to the throbbing between your legs. Your hole clenching, feeling far too empty. You whimper, attempting you grind on something, your eyes glazing over as you look up at Yoongi, to find him darkly staring back at you, a Sultry smirk on his lips, like he can read just how desperate you’re becoming by the second, how needy you are to have him. “I bet you’re soaking, hm?” Yoongi asks rhetorically.

Yoongi doesn’t need an answer, as the hand that was wrapped under your chin moves south, the tips of his fingers brushing past the tops your breasts on the way down, continuing until he reached the inside of your bare thigh. Two fingers then start trailing upwards, slowly, his feather light touch, torturing you. “Yoongi p-please.” You beg, and oh how sweet you sound. It makes Yoongi cock twitch inside his tight jeans. His lip is captured between his teeth, as he continues the slow pace. “Please what, what do you want Kitten?” He asks huskily. Kitten, fuck. That name effects you more than you ever thought it would, especially when it’s mixed with his deep voice. It makes your cunt drip. His fingers finally reach the hem of your skirt, playing with the material as his smirk deepens. Your eyebrows furrow, very frustrated. “Need y-your fingers, p-please, f-fuck need it so bad.” You beg again, stuttering over your words, unable to hold back the slight whine as his finger slips under the hem of your skirt, to continue the trail, his pace still slow. “My fingers? Where exactly do you need my fingers huh?” Yoongi teases, and god does it drive you crazy. Your knees begins to wobble in want, the grip on his shirt becoming even tighter as you cry out in frustration. “My p-pussy!” Yoongi chuckles at this as his lips attach onto your own, the taste of him flooding your senses. It makes you all the more needier for him as you feel his tongue lick at your lip, wanting entrance, which you give him, his tongue instantly moving to wrestle with your own. He swallows the moan that leaves you mouth as you finally feel his long fingers on your underwear. He groans, pulling away with your lip between his teeth, letting go after a second. “Fuck your so wet, Kitten.” His own eyebrows furrow, licking his lips, the taste of your mouth still there. “P-please.” You whisper, sliding your hands that sits in Yoongi’s shirt up and into his dark hair, pulling him back down to your mouth.

Yoongi wastes no time now, as he moves the lace material of your underwear to the side, his two fingers automatically running through your slick folds. Circling your hole, he collects your juices before running them up to your clit, circling the bud. Pleasure flows through your veins as you part from his mouth, gasping. “Fuck!” You moan, and the grip on your hair disappears as Yoongi’s falling to his knees in a blink of an eye. His eyes hungry, taking in your needy cunt. Using his free hand he moves your skirt so it’s bunched around your stomach, finding it in the way as he groans out. “Look at you. Who made you this wet hm?” He asks, as he leans forward his breath hitting the soft skin just above your sensitive clit. “You, Yoongi.” You answer him breathlessly, and that’s all he needed to hear for his digits to slide down to your hole, and his mouth to attach onto your clit. A loud whine leaves your mouth when his tongue first flicks on the little nub, your head banging against the door again, this time harder. His fingers slowly push their way past you tight hole, your mouth falling open in a silent moan as you feel the burning pleasure of being stretched open. Your fingers tangle through the soft strands of Yoongi’s hair, tugging lightly, forcing a deep groan to be released from him below. His two fingers curl deliciously on the spongey spot buried deep inside your cunt, over and over. It has your toes curling and eyes rolling back. Your mouth releasing noice you’ve never even made before. “Mmm that’s it, Kitten, are you gonna cum? Your clenching around my fingers so tight.” Yoongi pulls slightly away from your pussy panting, trying to catch his breath, a dark glimmer of mischief shines in his eyes. You don’t manage to pick up on it though, your heads to clouded with lust and the desperate need to cum. “P-please Yoongi, I’m so close.” You whine, tugging on his hair, pulling him back to your aching cunt. You’re so close, just a second longer and you’ll be there, floating in ecstasy. Your legs begin to shake and your pussy tightens around his fingers like a vice, making Yoongi groan in want and just as you’re about to step into that sweet release, Yoongi pulls his whole body away from you, your cunt empty and your painfully close orgasm fades into nothing.

“W-what? No, I was so close!” You practically sob, tears filling your eyes. Yoongi stands up and moves so close to you, toes touching but nothing else. Capturing your eyes, he lifts his hands up, the two fingers that were inside your cunt, taps your bottom lip before sliding along the red flesh. “Open.” Yoongi demands. You listen instantly stuck in some sort of lust filled trace. Yoongi hums to himself, loving how obedient you are as he pushes his digits between your lips. The taste of yourself fills your senses and you couldn’t hold back the small whimper building up inside you. “Suck. Thaaats a good girl.” He praises you as you hallow your cheeks, bobbing your head on his fingers, imagining to yourself that it’s something else entirely. Yoongi swallows as the same image flash his mind. The thought of your lips wrapped around his fat cock has it twitching. Just as he opens his mouth to tell you to get on your knees. There’s a knock at the door. “Yoongi-ah, are you in there? Have you seen Y/n? She’s missing.” Seokjin shouts. Looking at Yoongi, he seems to be caught in his thoughts so just as you’re about to answer for him his hand that you were sucking on pulls out from between your lips and covers your mouth, keeping you quiet. His dark eyes are on you again, almost daring you to speak. With his other hand gripping your arm, he moves you both away from the door, and once he’s in a place he likes his hand slides up your arm, tickling the skin until he reaches your shoulder. He presses you down and you fall loudly onto your knees, hissing at the small pain. “Yoongi-ah?” Jin shouts again, knocking. Yoongi looks down at you, smirking as he begins to unbuckle his belt and unzip the zipper of his jeans. Only pulling his boxers down enough to reveal his very hard cock.

You almost choke at the sight of him, not only is he long, but he’s thick, so thick. It makes you wonder how the fuck are you gonna even fit that inside you. Yoongi still smirking grasps his cock in one hand, running his hand up and down along his shaft. A drop of dripping from the tip and you lick your lip hungrily. This earns a chuckle from Yoongi. “Wanna suck my cock, Kitten?” He asks, his head tilting slightly to the side, and you nod so fast, needy. “Open up then.” He says as he taps the tip on your mouth as if to enticed you further. Obeying, you open up and Yoongi doesn’t hesitate to slide his cock inside right to the hilt, in one swift thrust, the salty taste of his precum coating your tongue in the process. You feel a hand in you hair holding you still as your nose brushes the skin above. Yoongi moans deeply as his head falls back, his eyes screwed shut. Another knock at the door brings his attention back to you, the same mischievous glint in his eyes. This time you see it, your eyes widening in wonder of what he’s about to do. The free hand that isn’t tangled in your hair moves to your cheek caressing it gently, thumb running along your cheek bone almost lovingly. It makes your heart sore. “Come in.” Yoongi’s raspy voice echos and it makes you jump as it practically slices through the almost silent room, other than the sound of your gags from his cock sitting snuggly inside your throat.

You can almost feel the stare that Seokjin is giving on the side of your face, and as you go to look as him, Yoongi growls out, his loving grip turning harsh on your jaw, forcing you to stay looking at him. “Eyes on me. It’s my cock down your throat. Not his.” Yoongi spits. His head looks back at his elder, smirking. “Ah, Hyung, how nice of you to join us. Why don’t you take a seat, hm?” His head tilts, dark hair moving with the action. When you think Seokjin was gonna turn around and leave, he actually walks closer taking the seat at the side of you both, one leg crossing over the other wordlessly. Yoongi’s head turns back to you, his cock twitching, almost like he forgot for a second that is was between your spit covered lips. “Now, where were we Kitten, hm?” He chuckles, pulling his hips out slightly before pushing back in, repeating the motion over and over, a steady rhythm of his hips, as he fucks your throat. “Such a good girl for me, letting me use your throat. My perfect little fuck doll.” Yoongi praises, his grip tightening in your hair in time with his last sentence. “So pretty with your lips around my fat cock, Kitten.” Your cunt clenches around nothing as you whine, though it sounds nothing like a whine from the way Yoongi started thrusting fast making you gag and choke around him. “Your throat’s so tight, almost want to cum down it.” He reveals, and you moan in approval, the thought of drinking Yoongi’s cum sounds more than appetising. “Oh you want that huh? Want to drink my cum, like a little cumslut huh?” Yoongi asks, and you try to nod your head as best as you could with your mouth stuffed. It makes Yoongi chuckle, mockingly. “Hm as much as I would like that, I’m making Seokjin hyung watch me take what’s mine. So, I’m cuming no where but inside that tight little cunt of yours.” He tells you. Oh what a filthy mouth he has, but you’d be lying if you said you didn’t love it. If your dripping cunt is anything to go by and the way it’s starting to run down the tops of your thighs. You almost forgot that Seokjin was even there, as you see him fidget from the corner of your eyes. But before you could even give him the slightest attention Yoongi pulls his cock from your mouth, gripping your arm, as he pulls you up from your knees to stand. Turning you around so your back is towards him he runs one hand up your spine, stopping once he reaches between your shoulder blades. Applying slight pressure he pushes you down so your top half is leaning on a table. A table that you didn’t even realise was there, as your body jerks from the cold wood.

Yoongi kicks your feet apart as he grasps the material of your underwear, pulling it to the side again. You groan when you feel his cock touch your folds lightly, making him chuckle. “Hm so excited for cock aren’t you, Kitten?” He asks teasingly, and you nod your head, but your lack of words makes Yoongi tut, bringing his hand back before swatting your ass cheek, quick and hard. Your whole body jumps forward, hipbone digging into the edge of the table, you gasp at the sting, the pain only adding to the arousal between your legs. “Words, Kitten. Use them.” He demands, and you obey, fast, so needy, that you whine lightly, you don’t even care as Seokjin chuckles from beside you. “Yes, fuck yes, want your cock.” Yoongi hums to himself, wrapping his hand around his girth he teases the head along your folds, tapping your clit twice with the tip before aligning his cock to your awaiting hole. “Yeah? Want my cock?” He asks again. “Hm, I can feel you clenching around nothing, greedy girl.” He says, while spanking your ass twice. “Beg for my cock. Show Jin how pretty you sound when you beg for me.” Yoongi tells you.

You don’t even wait as words spill from your mouth, not even holding back forgetting about Jin’s obvious presence at the side of you. “Please Yoongi, please, want it bad, want you. Please.” Tears spring to the corners of your eyes, so desperate to feel him buried inside your cunt. You can tell that Yoongi is loving every second and every whimper or whine that leaves your mouth. All for him. A gasp leaves your lips as Yoongi pushes the tip of his cock in your cunt, the blissful burning stretch of the tip makes you choke on your saliva. “Fuck so tight.” Yoongi curses through clenched teeth, pushing in his cock further, a hand grips your hip hard enough to bruise as the other wraps around your throat. Not choking you but just the feeling of it being there is enough to have adrenaline running through your veins excitedly. As his hips are flush against your plump ass cheeks, you both groan loudly In unison. The feeling of your cunt walls hugging Yoongi’s fat cock so nicely, forces him to take his bottom lip between his teeth. Your legs are already shaking at how good he feels inside you, so full, and you get impatient, wriggling your hips in effort to make him move and fuck you dumb. “Ah ah. Naughty girl.” Yoongi says disapprovingly, his hand tightening around your throat slightly.

He begins to pull his cock slowly out of you until nothing but the tip is inside you once again. “Tell Seokjin you're mine.” Yoongi growls, his teeth clenched, and you keen, arching your back, “I’m yours, Yoongi.” You moan breathily, and that’s when Yoongi pushes his cock back in. Hard. Knocking all the air out of your lungs. “Yeah. All mine.” Yoongi states, cockily, his eyes flicking to his Hyung for a split second. Picking up a fast pace, controlling it so his cock reaches deep inside you, his tip kissing that spot that has your toes curling and you eyes rolling back. His hand releases his grip on your neck, sliding up until he reaches your jaw. Leaning his body over you, his chest against your back. He forces your head to face Seokjin, taking in the sight of him. Man spreading, cheeks flushes and his hands rub at his cloth covers cock. A delicious sight. You feel Yoongi’s breath hit the side of your face, as he growls out. “Mine.” Taking your lobe between his teeth, you whimper. “Tell him.” Yoongi grits, fucking into your cunt harder, as his other hand works his way around over your tummy and between your thighs, teasing your clit. “Go on.” He demands, letting go of your jaw he stands back up, both hands gripping your waist fucking into you. You gasp for breath desperately trying to grasp onto something, anything, until they land on the edge of the table. “I’m yours, fuck.” You whine, your mouth dropping open as your brows pinch together. Your high, so close once again.

Your eyes widen however as Yoongi pulls out, turning you over and lifts your ass up onto the table. Whining at being edged once again, Yoongi grips your thighs, spreading them before he lets go of one to help push his cock back inside your tight, leaking hole. “Oh-” You moan out, falling back onto your elbows as Yoongi picks up where he stopped, his hand going back to your thigh not wasting any time as he begins his same pace. “Hm, so pretty when my cocks splitting your little cunt open, Kitten.” Yoongi praises. “Isn’t she Hyung?” You hear a small, breathy ‘yes’ leave Seokjin’s bitten lips. You keen at the praise, as your head falls back. “C-close!” You shout, as you force your head back up to look into Yoongi’s eyes, your own being wide. “Hm, I can tell, squeezing my fat cock so good.” Yoongi moans, giving you one harsh thrust as if to emphasise his words. “Mmm love your fat cock.” You babble mindlessly, earning a chuckle from Yoongi, though his own eyebrows pinch together and his tongue licks the corner of his mouth. Sweat dripping down his temples as his hair sticks to him. You looking like a similar picture. The feeling of his cock twitching inside is enough to show he too is close. “I know, wanna feel you cum on my fat cock right now though, baby.” He says, as he slides his hand further up your thigh until he’s rubbing at your clit in circles. “Be a good girl and cum for me.” He purrs, leaning over your frame, his body encasing your own. Your body stiffens as you feel euphoria run through you. Your vision turning white as you cum, hard. “F-fuck! Baby, where do you want my cum?” Yoongi gasps, your cunt like a vice around his girth. “Inside, god, want it inside please.” You cry out. “Shit!” Yoongi curses, his mouth fits over yours as he kisses you, all tongue and teeth. As spurts of his cum hit your walls coating them.

The after glow of your orgasms wash over you as you continue to kiss, Yoongi’s arms wrapping around your frame holding you against him as you wrap your arms around his neck. Pulling away from you with a final peck, Yoongi flashes a gummy smile, running a hand along your spine comfortingly. “Are you done?” Seokjin’s strained voice is heard properly for the first time since he has entered the room and you immediately flush burying your face into Yoongi neck embarrassed. “I think you’ve made your point Yoongi.” Jin teases further, an eyebrow raises as he uses the arms of the chair to push himself up. “So, uh, yeah, I’ll be leaving, thanks for the uh, free porn show guys.” Is Seokjin’s final words before he walks vacates the room, the tips of his ears bright red. Unbothered, Yoongi just chuckles turning back to you, placing a kiss in your hair, as he breathes in your scent. “Did you mean it?” He whispers, and you pull your face away from the warmth of his neck arms falling to the table to hold your weight up, confused. “Mean what?” You ask, tilting your head, your hair falling in front of your face, just for Yoongi you brush it behind your ear softly, smiling like a lovesick puppy. “That you’re mine.” His voice surprisingly steady despite how nervous he really is. “Yeah, I’m yours Yoongs, always have been.” You whisper leaning into Yoongi’s soft touch, inwardly cooing as Yoongi’s gummy smile appears of his face once again. “Good, and uh incase you didn’t know, I’m yours y/n.” He confesses, but you giggle at him, leaning up to place your lips on his quickly, in a small kiss. “I know.” You say softly, leaning further back you properly look at yoongi’s flushed face, post sex hair, thin layer of sweat covering his skin, kiss swollen lips. A sight that has your cunt clenching, around the cock that’s still buried inside you. Grunting, Yoongi’s gummy smile quickly turns into a small smirk. “Round 2?”

Taglist 🏷 : @ramblingsofawolfgirl @maknaeronix @blue-yoongles @marinasrizzel @kgalaxy224 @jjkdayss @snowyydayys @minvaleria93 @whocaresarchives @nervouskiwi @titty-ambulance {let me know if you want added or removed}

#bts smut #bts imagine #bts oneshot #poly bts smut #poly bts imagine #poly bts oneshot #min yoongi smut #min yoongi imagine #Min Yoongi oneshot #Kim Seokjin smut #Kim Seokjin imagine #Kim Seokjin oneshot #Yoongi smut #Yoongi imagine #Yoongi oneshot #Seokjin imagine #Seokjin smut #Seokjin oneshot #Yoongi x you

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bieuphoriasworld · 2 years

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So I’ll preface this by saying I am not someone who usually likes crossovers/aus in a different fictional universe, but this one came into my brain fully formed…

The Old Guard AU

Jason’s been in the marines a few years and has failed to make any friends, he’s a lone wolf who has climbed the ranks faster than you can blink through sheer skill. Weeks before at a checkpoint he had shot a civilian dead by mistake and has been almost numb to emotion since. No one notices.

In a fire fight against Iraqi republican guardsmen, he shoots a soldier at point blank range, close enough to see the fear in the older man’s face. He feels a sort of horror, but it is faint, trained out of him, and he buries it quickly. Jason is still going, leading his crew in a flanking motion to decimate their enemy. What he does not notice is the dead man sitting up, the bullet in his forehead slipping out, and a very pissed off Iraqi lieutenant taking up his gun. Jason hears the rifle cocking behind him, looks back, already accepting his fate (nearly pleading for it), and sees the angel of death.

He wakes up a day later on a stretcher in a tent with the other dead marines. And for the first time in years, he feels a genuine emotion; wrath.

From there he has to run, slipping through various military camps unseen, determined to find his murderer (the man you murdered first, whispers his dirty conscience). Eventually he finds his man, on a battlefield again, dragging wounded soldiers to cover. Jason’s enemy has a hardened look about him, grim as the grave. They fight hand to hand, Jason stabbing the other with his combat knife as many times as it takes. The Iraqi almost manages to choke him to death, but a strike to the jugular ends the fight. And Jason knows it won’t last.

From there it’s a game of cat and mouse. Sometimes Jason chases the Iraqi, sometimes it’s the other ways around. It all depends on who is tiring more. They kill each other every way imaginable; stabbing, shooting, brute force, car crashes, explosions, poison, drowning. They chase each other around the globe for 2 long decades. When they meet eyes it’s game on. Jason never once feels his aggression let up, nor does the nameless man seem to relent in his own rage. His wounds heal within seconds and he hasn’t aged a day from 30 since he died first.

The longest they go without fighting is a year. The world has changed in ways Jason can barely comprehend, he feels tired, and the only person who might relate to this would sooner end him than talk to him

After weeks of careful tracking, Jason finds the Iraqi in the countryside of southern France. It’s a remote house, surrounded on all sides by trees and miles of fields; perfect for them to just go at each other without a need for cover up. He finds the man sitting at a garden table in the early afternoon. He’s got a book in hand, a tea set and some tasty looking dishes in front of him. The sun is shining pleasantly through the trees. He looks clean and relaxed, in a linen button up, shorts and sandals. Jason, in contrast, hasn’t slept or bathed in weeks. His clothes are torn to shreds and most people who encounter him assume he is homeless, deranged, or both.

The man looks up from his book.

‘Ahlan. Would you like some tea?’

Jason is temporarily so stunned that he just lowers himself into a chair. They haven’t spoken in these 20 years, other than to scream dying curses in each other’s faces.

The man busies himself with making tea. He looks very normal like this. Not violent. Not immortal. Just a middle-aged man, slightly soft around the middle, with a few creases around his eyes, gently handling the little teacups.

He looks handsome.

Jason is silent until he is handed a steaming cup.

‘What the fuck are you doing?’

‘Ah, I don’t know if they have these types of meals in the mid afternoon in America. It’s just small bites to eat, some good quality tea.’

‘No. What the fuck man? Why aren’t you shootin’ me?’

The man pauses in thought.

‘Well you haven’t shot me yet,’ he murmurs quietly, eyes out to the treeline.

They sit and drink in silence for a while.

‘You know, it’s been 20 years and I haven’t ever even learned your name friend.’

‘We ain’t friends.’

‘No, but it’s still polite to ask.’

Jason laughs then, open and honest, feeling distinctly confused. Because - polite? He’s personally gutted the man multiple times. The Iraqi also seems to sense the humour in the question, because he laughs too, warm and a little throaty. It does something funny to Jason’s chest.

‘Jason. My name’s Jason Kolchek.’

‘Salim Othman.’

‘Nice to meet you Salim.’

‘Do you still plan to kill me today Jason Kolchek?’

Jason thinks.

‘Nah. I ain’t gonna kill you when you offered me somethin’ to drink, that’s just bad manners. My mama taught me better than that.’

‘Hm. It’s my son’s birthday today.’

‘You have a son?’

‘Yes. He turned 18 the day you killed me. In a few years he’ll be as old as I am.’

Jason had no friends or family before this; thinking of the man’s family, of taking him from them, it leaves a taste in his mouth like shame.

‘You got a wife too?’

‘No. Just my boy. His name is Zain. He’s a doctor of mythology. He researches times long gone from us. And make a decent living from it in England. He has a few children of his own now.’

Salim sips at his tea.

‘I haven’t spoken or seen him in 20 years, he thinks I’m dead. I wish I could hold him, tell him how much I love him. How proud of him I am. But I never will again. I won’t endanger him.’

Jason stews on that. He can hear an old motor in the distance, birds in the trees, music wafting out of the house from a radio.

‘Are you plannin’ on killin’ me Salim?’

Salim looks as worn out and lost as Jason is.

‘I never wanted to be a killer, I never wanted this. I wish Allah would let it end once and for all.’

‘We’ll tough shit. I ain’t giving it to you.’

‘No, I gathered that. I suppose such a short man couldn’t finish the job well enough anyway.’

Jason cracks a weak smile at the jab.

‘Fuck off old man.’

Salim shakes his head, exasperated.

‘Would you like to stay the night Jason? You look like you could use a bath and a rest.’

…

Aaand that’s what I’ve got for now. I think if I expanded this idea into an actual edited fic (rather than just the weird plot idea/scene draft hybrid ive written), we’d have more of the Joe/Nicky style bonding and travelling. Then they’d meet up with the other immortals. Rachel is definitely their leader and the oldest. Shortly after her are Dar and Clarice. Eric, Joey and Merwin are a few hundred years old, and Nick is a WW2 veteran who joined the marines when they became desegregated in 1942 before dying in combat. As the youngest and with the marines as a tie between them, I think Jason and nick are immediately going to be close friends. Rachel and Clarice are a couple. Dar is just this grumpy old man who doesn’t understand how the world has changed in the last millennia, or what these kids are doing. He’s definitely going to become a weird kind of mentor for Salim. Eric relentlessly chases scientific studies alongside Clarice, going where the pursuit of knowledge takes them. Joey and Merwin are constantly pulling stupid shit with their invulnerability and it regularly leads to the crew having to clean up the mess asap before they are discovered - time refuses to make them wiser. They encourage some of Salim and Jason’s wilder plans. Those two are gonna go through the slowest of burns while falling at the speed of light. They’ve got a lot of trauma to work out.

#jalim #house of ashes #old guard au #fic ideas

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yostresswritinggirl · 3 years

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Abandoned By The Altar

Part 3.1; were you really meant to be? VIBE

A timeline oriented story focused on your once perfect childhood relationship as Diluc’s bride to be, soon becoming estranged after the death of his father and his neglect. You only wish now that he looks at you the same way he did when you heard you were supposed to be together forever when you were young.

Pairings -> Diluc x Reader

Word Count -> 3510

Themes -> Reconciliation, Cyno was here, estranged relationships everywhereee

Series -> Part of Sojourner and Bonafide (event masterlist) Part 2

Warnings -> Goddamn violence

In the winery empire of the city of wine and freedom, this world is ruled by two unmatched tycoons that never fall from the top pedestal, with the mastery over wine-making and business marketing. Truly when it comes to this matter, Diluc Ragnvindr and (Y/N) (L/N) are the scariest and most charming duo to befall such economical prowess.

So when parties and gatherings are held in the Winery, noblemen and businessmen all over Teyvat scramble for a chance of invitation to level themselves to at least a humble chat with the prestigious business duo.

Yet even if they were witness, they will never be privy to the true secrets those two hold within.

"Apologies, esteemed guests. Master Diluc must excuse himself for a while," your stare shifted to the side over the rim of the glass you were cradling. His ruby eyes meeting yours after sparing the wine glass a stare, a meek nod you then reciprocate as he goes past your side with the Fatui Harbinger, the Seneschal and all other company joins him at a private room.

"But there is no cause for concern. The party shall continue under the supervision of the Mistress," you set down your drink upon hearing your name, stepping up to offer a humble yet radiant smile. You hope things work out on his end, was your thought as you finally entertained the remaining guests who recognize your prowess.

Behind your back you flicked your wrist as the Albino silently slinks away from the limelight to prepare.

The intervention was not as long as it was in terms, and yet the moment was painstakingly slow for your side. Many noblemen seeked not only your prestige as the master practitioner of economics but also the perfect wife ready for the taking. Your fingers uneasily fumble with the infinity ring on your hand, something they barely paid mind to as they continued their attempts to woo you, something you can only sigh over.

Unfortunately your 'relationship' with Diluc was still something only a few people know. There was no need to make it public yes, but it also caused a lot of unpleasant interactions that you wished you could easily avoid by telling, something you couldn't do to ensure your safety. Diluc was still a huge mystery to you despite the assurance of your encounter in the garden of cecilias.

But you thought to yourself with a sigh, a promise ring is different from an engagement ring.

A hand suddenly slides around your shoulder as you were distracted, and your head whipped to the side where the presence was with your elbow read to break a rib- "I hope I'm not intervening an important discussion," Diluc’s eyes bore straight ahead to the Fontaine businessman you were half-heartedly conversing with and your arm immediately drops to your side, "But I must discuss an urgent matter with the lady as well."

The Fontainian grumbles as he pries his head away from the hand on your head, producing his best smile in forced understanding as Diluc sweeps you away to the back. This is for a serious matter but the consistent grip on your shoulder had your mind reeling. It was only when he revealed his equipped Delusion did you have the mind to finally focus and work on your own attire.

"Guards! Take down the assassin!"

The blunt end of your polearm smacks painfully against the back of the chest plate of the guards, knocking three out as you look over to the Darknight to see him dispose the two nearest him. You then watch in awe as he summons chains from thin air, gripping them as he expertly throws it at the escaping Master Krupp, and like a lasso he was captured by the slithering cage.

Diluc's power always intrigued you since the day you were first witness of it. Not a Vision but definitely not far from it. He's also in the dark of its true meaning but even you know that he had a little bit of information from his four years of isolation, something he didn't want to tell you.

As your raise your head from staring at his Delusion, hearing their grunts of interviews, a glint to your right suddenly alerted you of another presence. "Wait-!"

"Master's planning to-"

You muffled your horrified gasp at the sight of the blood shooting out of Krupp's side, your polearm shakes in your hand before tightening your grip once again as you two turn to the assassin. Il Dotorre stands there in great poise two giant needles hovering by his sides.

He just killed his own companion, such thoughts made your face twist under the black veil that covers your identity as much as it could. And those thoughts distracted you from the one-sided conversation in front of you, "Keep up the good work and hone your unimpressive powers.

But this visionless one," an arm slinks around your waist in a blink, a masked face inches away from yours that forced you to hold your breath, "is much more remarkable than you."

Before Diluc could even reprimand him, he disappears within seconds after bidding his farewell. And your knees would have buckled if not for your fiancé catching you in the nick of time, collapsing at the tense situation that had passed.

You could have died like Krupp.

But the feeling of Diluc's arms squeezing you protectively reminds you of your existence.

Not even a day old of cecilias were swept off the stone slab in place of newly harvested ones, both batches can be mistaken to be the same with how healthy they still seem to be. This was Diluc's observation as he watches you replace the flowers on his father's grave. Crepus Ragnvindr.

Perhaps it was his own neglect and adamant refusal that made him forget about this isolated cemetery. He expected the grave keeper or at least a member of the Winery to keep it well-kept, not you who seems to have come to this place on a daily basis.

The smile he enjoys and dreads is wiped from your face as you offer a silent prayer. Eyes closed and hands together. Next to you Diluc only stands with his arms crossed as his gaze continues to linger at the engraved words.

Lisa was at the mansion earlier to investigate about the recent Fatui incident, and as the interrogation ensued by the gazebo of the Cecilia gardens, Diluc realized that you lingered in the distance to eavesdrop. In the span since your arrival and before his, did anyone else explain the accident to you? What did you hear? Did anyone actually tell you anything?

And maybe these questions were the reason that he willingly accepted your invitation to visit his father's grave just like that.

Four years without your constant touch and smiles had broken Diluc into who he is now, an empty shell of a man who once had high hopes. A helpless puppet who struggles to grasp the man he was before. And as he moves closer enough for your shoulders to touch, it was an unconscious gesture that cries for your help in the turmoil that spirals in his head.

But when you look at him with a reassuring smile— Diluc's walls fortified by four years of hatred and isolation all came crashing down with the heavy wave of his tears. The pain of that day pours out of his lips as he felt small within your arms, eyes painfully avoiding your face.

The true story of his father's death, the disaster that lead to his resignation from Ordo Favonius, his quest to find answers in all the years he had abandoned his life in Mondstadt.

There were details that you were unaware was truncated from his confessions, the only ones that mattered were those he spilled.

"I'm sorry, I'm sorry," words the both of you repeated for the pain you two couldn't confide to with one another ever since that day.

No, things wouldn't be fixed in one day. Hearts destroyed for years cannot be melded back today, but it is that moment that solidifies the trust between you two:

That deep within the abyss of your souls lie the desperate desire to reach out to one another like they used to before.

The petals of the Cecilias on Crepus' gravestone tilts in respect, but within it blooms a new hope you were both not witness to.

Only the elderly and close acquaintances knew of your original existence in Mondstadt, and only a few ever recognizes your prior occupation and childhood before you left for Sumeru. Even if you had only been gone for two years, changes so drastic happened in your wake.

The most painful one always lingers in the back of your mind, never failing to bring a frown to your face.

"You loved Ludi Harpastum when we were children, so what's with the long face?" Your eyes that lingered on Amber and her new friend looks up to the ones next to you, eyes also distant as it comes upon yours.

You couldn't tell him or even ask about Crepus, not now at least. But the words he spoke washed away the melancholy off your face, smile brightened at the idea that he still remembers such precious memories. He looks away immediately. "I do, but I'm not a kid anymore, the festival caters to children's participation."

Diluc hums in agreement and the talk ceases like so. He's not into small talk but the short conversation still had you feeling light and euphoric.

Soon enough Amber had come over to introduce the two of you to her demure friend Collei, shy and hesitant but still trying her best to be polite. An imagined arrow pierces through your heart at the cute child in front of you, and you couldn't help but coo and oogle at her.

So adorable with beautiful green hair, unique and paired perfectly with her wide eyes. Every compliment makes her face redder. This only makes your fangirling worse, already hugging the flustered child who's having an internal mental breakdown.

"Oh, I wish I could have a child as pretty as youuu!"

Amber looked up upon the sudden shift of his posture, absolutely baffled at the sight of Master Diluc's face as colorful as his hair as his gloved hand desperately tries to hide it. The knight felt like she had witnessed something she shouldn't, immediately snapping her head back to you and Collei with her lips trying its hardest not to break into a smile.

You were on your knees to be eye-level with Collei as you held her hand, placing on it a bag of mora as you told her to use it to enjoy the most out of the festival. Her previous embarrassment still lingers as evidence on her still flushed cheeks, yet her eyes had in it a gaze of awe.

There was hesitance when Amber finally dragged Collei away to venture through the festival more, leaving you in exaggerated tears at the departure of 'a little angel' with a still silent Diluc next to you. The sun had already set, and yet you two stood in place for a little longer.

The thought of having children passing by your minds.

If there's a recipe for a good time in Angel's Share, Kaeya knows what it is.

A cold glass of Death After Noon, raucous laughter spurred on by joyous tunes, and just the right company. It was a while since he'd last felt such comfort with company, he thought as he holds back a smile and grimace as he sips the sour grape juice in his mouth, eyes twinkling as he watches your already flushed face intensify as you down your drink.

When Kaeya had heard from multiple yet scarce accounts from the servants of the Winery on how you act drunk, he felt it was his mission and privilege to find out how such moment happens. And so one night when you two had the time to sit down at Angel's Share, what should have been a night of a single drink and grape juice after switched around to nothing but liquor.

"You've been looking at us weird the whole day, do you want to fight?" The Cavalry Captain reached for your hand to settle down your glass, but when you literally threw your drink against the wall with a loud bang, he knew he was done for when at his peripherals he saw the horrified look of your Fiancé as he was immediately alerted with the breaking of glass.

"Oh shit, she's feral," Kaeya breathed incredulously with a small, small hint of awe as he watched you pull up your sleeves to throw hands.

"What the hell is going on here?"

"Luluuuu!" The swordsman did NOT miss the minute detail of Diluc's red stare recognizing the switched drinks on the table, exposing his involvement on the matter. If it were not for your intoxicated self barreling towards your fiancé, he would have been given a scalding glare.

A jumbled mess of a conversation transpired before the captain, made up of hushed grumbles and slurred whines sometimes filled with begging or with rage from the random person you'd set pure hatred upon seconds ago. Your hand clutched his sleeve as his other one was placed on your shoulder to ground you, somehow this proximity and interaction... made Kaeya remember the first time he met you.

"Alright, that should be enough for tonight," the third wheel clapped his gloved hands together as he stood from his table. "This commotion is on me, I'll take her home-"

"What gave you the idea that I'd let you?"

The same hostility that started four years ago made the man of frost- freeze where he stood, challenging the accusing glare with a playful squint. The mini stand-off already made the other patrons too curious as all attention was caught by the trio, while you had your face buried to Diluc's fluffy ponytail as his bargaining chip for calming/distracting you.

Diluc isn't familiar with taking care of a drunkard, only kicking them out. If he were to leave you at your current state, he'd be clueless as is on the mistakes that would pile up.

Kaeya raised this point as he reached over to take your arm, the redhead publicly wrapping his arms around you protectively in response. The blunette wasn't even wary of the increasing agitation his sworn brother wore but the scandalous gasps and gossips the customers around them now speak at the action.

Get a grip, Diluc, you wanted to keep this hidden, didn't you? By some miracle, he managed to communicate this telepathically through side glances and gritted teeth.

But if there was one thing the Ragnvindr had inherited from being with you for more than ten years:

It was your stubbornness.

...

When you roused from your slumber, you were in an unusual place yet one so familiar. The nostalgia hit you tenfold more than the headache your hangover dangerously inflicted, "How did I get here even?" It was four years since you've last seen this place, set foot in this room even.

The moonlight hitting through the room's balcony tells you it's around midnight.

The room didn't change a bit last you remember it, as if it was well-kept despite being abandoned. The lamp that was tilted a little bit, books of stories you've read long ago were arranged the same way you'd left it. Not a single dust catches on to your soles as your feet touched the wooden floor of your room in the Ragnvindr's home.

It was still creaky at some parts of which you expertly maneuvered around bare, shoes discarded in place for stealth as you exited to the corridor. No sounds or light emanates from the underside of Diluc's room across from yours, without checking you weaved through the hall to climb down the main stairs.

You find your man seated by the fireplace. You may not live here anymore but even you were well aware of his insomnia that stretches past sunrise.

"You're awake," he speaks when you reached the main floor.

"Look who's talking," you mumbled cheekily as you sat adjacent to him, noticing his quick glance at your bare feet.

Tight lipped as it may, you saw a little quirk to the edges of his lips that lifted up your spirits through the small chatter and mostly silent time after that. The crackles and embers of the furnace was good company too, and yet it was not enough to distract you from the obvious stare he was giving to your leg.

Anxiously you hid one your foot behind the other, folding your legs under the chair's shadow when his gaze didn't waver. Perhaps it wasn't that bright of an idea to leave your room barefoot, maybe it was too childish, for him especially if it was bothering this much.

You opened your mouth to excuse yourself, or maybe defend your actions,

"Can I touch you? Nothing- Nothing sexual, there's just something I need go check."

You didn't have to ask, was what you wanted to say. But you held back your tongue in favor of giving a meek nod, curious and faintly doubtful of whatever it is that he would do.

Yet when he kneeled down and gently took your leg upon his hold, you can't help but smile solemnly as his gloved touch reached your thigh where the scar from long ago lingers. Diluc's eyes stayed on that spot, soothing the long lost pain with rubbing circles.

Ticklish, as he leans down to graze a soft kiss to it. It almost made you cry with how gentle this Diluc is in front of you.

"I promise... I'll do better. With every heartbeat I have left, I will defend your every breathe."

You're crying now.

One faithful morning in a miraculous setting where Diluc was the only one available to tend to the reception, a young man presents himself by the entrance with a passive look. This unfamiliar man was someone he knew, something he realized when he finally looked down for a better view past the black hood.

"I am here in the guidance of an old address. Is this where (Y/N) (L/N)?"

"I'm (Y/N)'s fiancé, what do you want?"

"... That does not answer my question, but I am only here to see how life has been faring since two years past."

Diluc never felt discomfort in silence as heavy as this. Having to walk with Cyno the whole way to Mondstadt from the Winery was not part of his itinerary, nor did he wholy agree to the arrangement. Perhaps it was because he knew how you two were good friends back from his 'observations' in the Academia that he felt responsible.

Or it was his pride to not let the shorter guy know that you were in fact, not resident to his home despite being betrothed.

It would have been very weird.

"What the actual- Cyno?! Is that really you?!" Why you were near the gates that day was a mystery to them both, but at the sight of the familiar figure had you barreling towards the foreigner, tackling him into a hug with a laugh so carefree it almost pained him.

That was your signature move to when you always met him excitedly in your childhood. Diluc shakes away the thought as he stood at the side to watch and eavesdrop. You're around the same height as the Sumerian, although the hood and ears? makes it hard to distinguish who was taller between you two.

"What are you doing so far out from the Academia? Aww, did you miss me?" Playful as always to those you are close to.

Scarlet eyes found its way to him in a split second. "I came here under the request of Lisa, she needed scholarly help over an important matter," your pout had him smile a tiny bit, "but it is relieving to meet you once again."

In a honesty, it was a curious case as to why he was even there, lingering. He has work to do, the Tavern's first shift was his. But when he took a step away Diluc found it very difficult to leave you be, to leave you with this... person.

He has no business here.

He shouldn't idle.

He's not the type to idle.

You turn your head at the sound of footsteps as you realized Diluc approaching, who you honestly thought already departed during your reunion with Cyno. "Ah, senpai, I wanted to introduce to you my-" full and pale lips captured your words in a quick swift dip, a grip on your waist to steady you before he stood back too quick for you to react.

"I'll get going, stay safe."

Quick and concise like his kiss, Diluc left in hurried steps as you stood there, a mess. He'd never- he has never-

"How amusing," the words the Sumerian uttered barely registered into your short-circuiting brain.

I can't believe this. I'm actually cutting this to a fourth part what the fuck, I swear the next one is the last,holy-

@optimestick @moaa @dandelion-dreams @witchsungie @lehra @zelos-simp @legionqueensav @snackgod @rxsalinee @cala-ran @wind-wheel @lilydewi22 @yellowflowre @traveler-lumine @nonniechan @creation-magician @hanniejji @gojos-baby @just-some-stars @volleybloop @mortifiedmoon @dankchikorita @endeavors-big-dick @karlitaburrito @bunniesrorange

#genshin impact x reader #Genshin impact Diluc #Diluc x Reader #exile.flower #exile.pocketwatch #gender neutral #female reader #sojourner special #I hate tumblr

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issaxcharlie · 3 years

Text

Ghost Of You 2/2

Pairing: Ghost! Luke Patterson x Fem Reader

Summary: Luke, Reggie and Alex have to assimilate their loss. For Luke of his girlfriend, and for the others of their best friend after suddenly learning that she didn’t have the future they imagined, and instead died 23 years ago.

Thank you to @cookiebuba for being the head of the entire idea and trusting me with it, and to Emy for almost holding my hand to force me to write🤣💜

PART 1 HERE

“It can’t be.”

“Luke, I-”

"No, Julie. You are not telling me that the woman of my life, the purest person who has ever stepped on this world, not only lost her partner and her best friends, but was only able to live her life for two more years and then ended in a horrible accident. It's as if life wanted to torture her before taking her too.”

“Love of ?... Zeppelin shirt you wore when you ran away. Of course.”

“I- It can’t be true, please tell me it’s not true, Julie.”

“Luke... she loved you so much.”

He falls on the floor. The impact is strong, as if his legs have stopped working.

"I know." He whispers slowly, his gaze empty as multiple tears fall from his eyes.

The rest of the gang threw themselves to the ground around him and hugged him with all their might, trying to unite his broken pieces without any success. Alex and Reggie each crying silently over the loss of their sweet friend.

“What day did she pass away? Alex whispers.

"Let me search, one moment." Julie gets up quickly and checks on her laptop to find a little note about the singer's death.

"The rising singer Y/N Y/L who had just released the biggest hit of her career passed away this afternoon in a terrible car accident after leaving the cemetery where her late boyfriend, Luke Patterson, was buried. Y/L was there in commemoration of the 2 years of the loss of the aspiring musician, who died from a sudden tragic intoxication along with the rest of his band. Something to rescue from this tragedy is that at least she's already reunited with her eternal love. May both rest in peace.”

“This can’t be. My Y/N can’t be gone. Not her, not like that.” Luke is still in denial, unable to believe that his little girl suffered such a terrible ending.

“Maybe she’s not. There's still a chance that she's also a ghost.”

“Yeah, Julie’s right. We need to look out for her, we can't write her off without trying to find her first.” Reggie's eyes sparkle with hope, rushing to cover Alex's mouth in case he says anything other than motivating.

Luke takes his flannel and disappears immediately. Both Reggie and Alex stare sadly at Julie who simply whispers a "go, he needs you." They nod and teleport to their friend.

As expected, Luke is in front of the window of an old music store. He met his girlfriend here so many years ago, the day his parents agreed to buy him his first guitar.

The store had a small section where customers could try out some instruments and she was playing the guitar they had there and singing for the small audience. It seemed like it was something she did often because both the workers and certain customers seemed familiar with the girl.

Luke was captivated by her from the first moment. The energy and passion that radiated from her in every move was unreal. He had never seen anyone happier, much less singing with a borrowed guitar from a small downtown store.

The store is completely abandoned, so without saying anything he comes in and walks towards the small stage.

The ghosts of two 12-year-old kids singing together into the microphone invades his memory. If they only knew.

"Do you remember what was the first thing she said to you?" Reggie and Alex sit next to him on the floor, looking straight at the very small stage. They both try to imagine what their friends must have looked like singing here together the first time. Luke totally invading little Y/N's presentation trying to captivate her with his 0% music experience and 100% of enthusiasm.

Luke laughs through tears. "You have the voice of a country singer."

Alex starts crying when he imagines her. He met her just a few weeks later so he knows exactly how she must have looked and sound.

Reggie smiles while shedding a tear, remembering all those afternoons Y/N convinced Luke to join them in their country sessions. He knows that's why Luke hasn't wanted to know anything about country or his songs since they got back. They remind him of his sweet girl.

“I was so offended. I still didn't know anything about music but I had already decided that I would be a rocker. If I hadn't already been so dazzled by her I would have left without looking back.”

“And what did you answer to defend your honor?”

"You think so?" The three of them start laughing while still crying. A heartbreaking mix of pain comes from their chests.

“C’mon guys, next stop.”

The three of them were teletransporting around the city during the day without any success. Luke's desperation increasing for every place the songwriter wasn't.

At night the three decide to go back to the studio. Luke is heartbroken, bloated after crying all day, eyes red and sore, and whatever it was that was driving him to continue, off.

His friends couldn't do much for him either because each was living the loss in their own way, concentrating on living their own pain until they could process it.

Julie wraps them in blankets on the couch and tries to fill them with love, making sure to hug Luke tightly, who seems about to fall apart.

“Does anyone want to talk about her? Maybe it could make you feel better.”

“She was my entire soul, the words and melody in each of my songs. I just, I love her more than anything in this world. I would give anything for her. My guitar, my voice, my songs, whatever it took for us to be together. I know it doesn't seem like it at this point, but we belong together.”

“We know you do, man.”

“I didn't tell you but I dream about her almost every night since we got back. It is always the same dream. She is in bed, leaving my side intact. She's wearing one of my shirts and hugging my favorite one while sobbing. She falls asleep listening to the ballad I wrote for her soaked in tears and no matter how hard I try to wake her up, I can't get her to see or hear me. I can’t get her. After a few minutes she gets up still asleep and begins to dance as we did so many times, but alone. Then she stops and starts crying again inconsolably. And that's when I wake up."

"I'm so sorry, Luke. She deserved so much more." Reggie walks over to hug him, his head resting on his arm while he sobs.

“We couldn't even say goodbye to her.” Alex cries, his eyes completely red.

“We already know that she visited your graves, perhaps we could do the same, dedicate a few words to her.” Julie offers in an attempt to help them find some peace.

Luke looks devastated, but he nods his head as tears continue to fall from his face, the ring that his girlfriend gave him going in and out of his finger. Alex hugs Julie while she strokes his hair in an effort to calm him down and Reggie runs up to get a notebook and pencil to start planning what to say to his best friend tomorrow.

The three of them hang around all night, crying, writing, hugging, remembering the spark of Sunset Curve. In the morning before going to visit her, they realize is exactly the 25th anniversary of that tragic night that changed the lives of the four forever. Luke nearly punches a hole in the wall upon hearing the sad coincidence.

Her grave is right next to Luke's, who has never been here before and can't help but feel a bit anxious.

“Don’t worry, I’ll start.” Reggie tells the guitarist as he takes a step forward, a small smile on his lips.

"Hello, princess. Long time, huh? I'm Reggie, by the way. In case you don't recognize me from the slight change in my hair. I am trying a little more gel, I want something more elegant and classic. What do you think? Yes, I also thought you would like it.” Julie and Alex smile at hearing him talk to her as natural as possible.

“I tried very hard to think of what to say, because if there is anyone who deserves my best words, it is you. And three things came to mind that I want to share with you.

First, the color yellow.

Yellow like the guitar you were saving for two years to buy. You did everything. You were a babysitter, you walked dogs, you worked in the school library, you sang with your old acoustic guitar in every cafe, basically everything that will let you win some money.

And the day before you could finally go buy it, my dad broke my bass in a moment of anger in one of his typical fights with mom that got really out of hand. At least he didn’t hurt her, huh? But when you're a kid you don't even think about the possibility that something like that could happen, you just focus on the broken instrument in your hand. I ran out and ended up on the stairs of your house with my face soaked and one of the broken pieces in my hand.

You hugged me and promised that everything would be fine. That I was always going to have you four and that we would always be family. You assured me that good things happen to good people. And I believed you, you know? You were always right. But now that I'm here, that I know you didn't have the happy ending you deserved, I'm honestly not so sure anymore.”

Luke and Alex start crying again, each hugging Reggie from one side. Reg tries with all his might to continue through the tears, while Julie looks at them with a broken heart.

“The next day when I came back from school a new bass was on my bed. You talked to Mom so she could take the credit for the gift, but coincidentally was exactly the bass that I fell in love with a year earlier when we went to check if your beloved yellow guitar hadn't dropped in price. Luke revealed to me a few months later that you had to borrow money from your mom in order to complete the exact money for that one.

How generous do you have to be in order to do something like that? how noble? How loving? How selfless? You were always more than I deserved. I was supposed to be like an older brother for you, but it was always you who took care of me. I have Julie and Carlos, and I'm trying to be with them as you were with me. I had the best step sister in the world to teach me, and I hope I can do you justice.” Julie starts crying too after hearing his words, and resists the urge to going to hug him because she knows that they need their space to let go all the suffering that they carry.

“Second, my leather jacket.

When we started the band we made a 100% commitment to being rockstars. And a very important part is the look. You accompanied me on a walk around the city looking for the right outfit to literally go sing to the people who were lining up in front of the clubs.

Anyone could have left me alone on that for multiple reasons, not even these two wanted to face the trouble. But you followed me without thinking twice.

The afternoon was over and we still haven't found anything. Our feet couldn't take it anymore and we had 10 minutes to run to the club. But we stopped by a little store that had a black leather jacket in the window and you said, Reg, this is it.

You excitedly took me by the hand and when I tried it on, the rest was history.

Then I tried to get the whole band to use them but these two boys without fashion sense didn’t want to. You, on the other hand, supported me and wore your leather jacket during all the Sunset Curve performances we had, convincing me that they were our good luck charms and that if we both used them everything would be amazing. Oh god, I miss you so much.

And third, a star.

I thought you were a star when I heard you sing for the first time.

I thought you were a star when you and Luke managed to write the whole Sunset Curve album in 2 months.

I thought you were a star when you bought me my bass, when you made Alex feel better after one of his strongest attacks, when you filled Luke with love and support when he needed it the most.

And I believe it now that I know you are gone.

If you are in heaven, you have to be a star. And not just a star, the brightest star of all. I promise to look for your light every night to wish you sweet dreams. I will also sing you some country since you were the only one who appreciated my incredible sound, I hope it makes you smile.”

“That was beautiful, Reggie. I’m sure she loved it.” Julie finally reaches out to hug him as Alex prepares to be next.

“Hey. I don’t even know where to start.

I- I guess I should start saying I could never pay you all the times you were there to pick me up when I needed someone the most. I went back to dancing a little again. It's not the same without you, but somehow it makes me feel you close. I also met someone, oh Y/N, he’s so special, I'm sure you would have loved him and I would have loved the opportunity to introduce him to you. You were always there.

You were there to support me when I decided to learn drums to cope with my anxiety. You sang the song I was practicing over and over to keep me company and reassure me that what I was doing sounded good.

You were there to support me when I told you I like to dance. We spent hours choreographing different iconic songs and just laughing and enjoying creating more memories together.

Not shocking at this point but you were also there for me when I confessed to my parents I’m gay and you gave me strength all those times that I wanted to fall because they no longer saw me the same way.

You were always my safe place. And I regret with all my heart that I couldn’t be yours.”

Alex breaks down. She kept them on their feet during her darkest days and they paid her off by causing her the most horrible pain imaginable. Julie and Reggie surround her in their arms while sobbing. The last one of the band standing moves closer to the grave and drops to his knees.

“I’m so sorry, my love. I’m so fucking sorry.” Luke tries to be strong, but tears start falling like waterfalls from his eyes, his face red in a mixture of despair, sadness and anger.

“I will never forgive myself for leaving you alone. Baby, I've been without you for only 1 month and I’m going crazy, even with the boys and Julie by my side. I don't even want to imagine what you must have been through those two years. My soul is shattered just thinking about it.

At first when we returned I imagined you were happy after having fulfilled all our plans with someone else. And I thought nothing could hurt me more than that, but obviously I was wrong. Because although it hurt me that I couldn’t be the one who was with you, thinking that you had been happy gave me the peace to be able to continue. Now that I know that life took away your opportunity, the only thing I feel is anger.

Anger towards me, anger towards destiny. Anger at not being able to be together even after death. Since we discovered where you are, I have only been able to think of cross over and finally be with you again.

Or at least go back to the night before everything turned into a nightmare. Fall asleep with you in my arms one more time.

I swear I even miss your snoring and you biting my cheek after your goodnight kiss, as you would say, in a gesture of love.”

“Hello again, my love.

I can't believe 25 years have passed. First of all, I want you to know that I'm okay. Or well, the equivalent for ghosts that are destined to haunt the earth alone for all eternity. I made a friend for several years, Rose. I told you about her, remember? I know you guys would have been good friends, she was a ridiculously talented musician. Since she died I no longer had the strength to go back to the studio, but for a long time I enjoyed her company in one of my favorite places. She promised to tell you that I'm waiting for you. I will wait whatever time is necessary, okay? I love you so much, baby.

You three are always on my mind, and I think I can finally accept that the pain is just never going to go away. But lately something super strange has happened to me, let me tell you.

Throughout these years, in the darkest days, I see you. But, they were always memories.

A month ago, I started to see you having other kinds of experiences and I honestly don't know how to feel about it. Am I going that crazy? I selfishly hoped that you too were ghosts for so many years. I looked for you 5, 10, 15, 20 years. And just as I decide to give up, my head imagines you all over the city.

The first time I saw you singing Reggie's jam on the beach. You guys looked so happy, love. It filled my heart with peace for a few seconds, knowing that somewhere up there you are enjoying life singing together all day.

Then I saw my beloved Alex with a cute boy. My heart melted, I can’t even explain how much I wanted to run to hug him and gossip about it.

Baby, he looked so peaceful. I always wanted that for Alex. I didn't know whether to be happy or cry because that didn’t actually happen, so I did both.

The penultimate time was a few nights ago when I was walking in front of the Orpheum and I heard your voices. How wicked my mind is, right? A knife to the heart would hurt less.

And now, I can't even get close to your grave because I'm imagining you all again.”

Y/N doesn't know what to do, if she gets close enough will they disappear? What If they don’t? Will she bear to see them up close? She has been dancing with their ghosts in her dreams for so many years, but It’s not the same as doing it when she is fully awake.

She is about to run out of there in fear when the silhouette of a fourth person catches her attention. She doesn't know why, but it immediately reminds her of Rose. Could it be that she is imagining her friend too?

Curiosity is stronger than fear, like all those times when she got into trouble with her boys. She walks carefully towards her grave which is next to her beloved Luke.

“I swear I even miss your snoring and you biting my cheek after your goodnight kiss as you would say, in a gesture of love.”

“I don't freaking snore, I told you a million times already... and now I'm talking with my imagination, great.”

The band turns in shock towards the fifth voice. That's when she can see the girl's face and realize who she is.

“Julie? But, how?”

“Y/N?” Alex whispers on the verge of passing out.

She starts to panic, just before the boys can do something about it, a new person appears behind her.

“Hey, you took a long time." She turns around and jumps into the arms of who has become her only friend in recent years.

“Phoenix, thank god.” Her body continues to shake but she clings tightly to her friend while crying uncontrollably.

To say the ghosts are confused would be an understatement. And apart from that, the guitarist is having many conflicts with the jealousy that he is feeling at the moment. They haven't seen each other in 25 years and when they finally do, she runs into someone else's arms and clings to him like her life depends on it.

What does that mean for them? Is it too late?

“Beautiful, what's wrong? Who are they? Oh, wait. You guys were at the club a few weeks ago, you're friends with Willie, right?”

Luke feels like dying all over again hearing him call her that. She continues to shake but finally lets go.

“What? You can see them?”

“Shouldn’t I?” He looks at her skeptical and shifts his eyes from her to the ghosts.

“I- Oh my god. I'm going to pass out.“

“Baby, look at me.” Luke’s voice is a mix between a plea and a demand. The terror of knowing that perhaps he has already lost her without having had the opportunity to fight for her clouds his judgment and tears begin to fall from his face again.

25 years. 25 years fighting not to forget his voice. 25 years having him only in dreams, in memories, in melodies. 25 years waiting for him. 25 years on her own.

She turns slowly to meet those honey-green eyes she craved for so long to see, a painful smile from Luke makes her smile through tears.

She carefully lifts her right hand and gently draws it to his cheek, almost exploding at the feel of it.

“You came back. Oh my, It’s really you.” She jumps to the guitarist, entwining her legs at his hips, her arms tangled with all her strength around him, her head buried in his neck inhaling his scent. Tears coming out as if to drown her, all the pain and suffering that she faced all these years finally leaving her body.

Luke wraps her tightly in his arms, still unable to process what’s happening.

Alex and Reggie begin to smile without fully assimilating what is happening, while Julie begins to jump of joy.

“Babygirl, I'm sorry to ruin the moment but I have to rush to the club. Will you be okay here?"

“She's always safe with me." The guitarist growls, and Y/N starts laughing when she hears it.

"The jealous, protective baby in the beanie is right, don't worry Nix. I’ll go and find you later."

Phoenix nods with a smile and disappears. Julie begins to scold Luke while Reggie and Alex approach to touch the cheek of their best friend, still in the arms of the guitarist who does not seem to have any intention of letting go.

“We should go home to catch up. Reggie and I will accompany Julie, it seems that you two should speak alone first." Luke doesn't think twice and disappears with her in his arms.

“Good things happen to good people.” Reggie whispers as he hugs his friends and they start walking home.

Luke and Y/N reappear in the studio and they are both shocked for a few seconds. The girl trembles again in fear of dreaming.

“Hey, come here baby. Shh, I’m here, I promise.”

“Don’t leave me ever again, please.” He can see that it is very difficult for her to understand that is really happening, and to think that she lived without him not 2 but 25 years makes him want to cry again.

“I won’t. I promise, beautiful. Never again.” Luke wraps her in his arms, but she lifts her head from his chest to push her lips against his. The kiss is urgent, but they both instantly recognize each other and fit in perfectly. Luke picks her up again and gently lays her down on the couch, both desperate to feel the other, to recognize every inch.

“I missed you so much baby, I love you more than anything.” Luke whispers between kisses, not willing to have her an inch away from him.

“I love you my love. I love you, I love you, I love you.” She says while kissing the love of her life, happy for the first time in 25 years.

Before things get to escalate, the rest of the band shows up in the studio followed by Julie who clearly walks through the door.

"Let go of her man, it's our turn!" Y/N gets up quickly from the sofa while her boyfriend complains and she throws herself at both of them who pick her up as best they can and spin her in the air.

They put her down and Julie and her stare each other, both raise their arms and meet in a quick but sweet hug.

“You said my name back there, how?” The question that she has stuck since she met her finally coming to light.

“I met your mom many years ago when I came to visit the studio and realized that she could see me. We were friends for many years and I had the opportunity to see you grow up, but I always made sure to be upstairs when you came in in case you could see me too.”

“Well, now I understand how Carlos felt when he found out that we lived with ghosts. And It sounds like mom watches over us both from heaven.”

“Yeah, I’m sure she does.” Both girls smile and hug each other once more.

“I can't believe I endured 25 years without having those beautiful arms around me.” She whispers as they both lie on the couch, Luke has her completely cornered in his arms.

“I’m so sorry, baby. It breaks my heart that you have suffered that much for so many years.”

“It was not your fault. You lost as much as I did that night. Besides, I always knew that you would find me sooner or later. We belong together.”

“We do. I, I k-know we have way more to talk about but, who was the dude from the cementery?”

The insecurity in his voice is evident and Y/N can't help but smile. His emotions are complex, real, and nothing can make her happier than that.

“I’ll tell you all about my friend later, okay? For now... dance with me? I want to dance with the real deal.” He smiles and they both stand up, hugging each other as they slowly move through the studio as they did many times before life separated them.

The Luke in her arms is her Luke, the same one she has been waiting for so many years, finally back in her arms. And just as she thought when she lived, she will dance with his ghost for all eternity.

Thank you for reading✨✨

Taglist: @writerinlearning, @ghostofmgg @strangerthanfanfiction713, @thebloodthirstyvampress, @kinda-really-lost, @kcd15, @magnet-girl, @aliandthephantoms, @stxrkspidey, @pinkrockstar19, @s0uz4s, @shycupcakealissa @cookiebuba, @fangirlangioma, @sageellsworth05, @twist3dtinkerbell, @sunsetcurvenotsunsetswerve, @caitsymichelle13, @ifilwtmfc, @luckylouiebug, @bibliophilewednesday, @totomoshi, @siennanoelle01, @lunashadow6955, @bookfrog247, @morganayennefertyrell, @kiss-themoongoodbye, @rachelle3musicals, @imsydneywalker, @really-dont-forget-it @agentstarkid @talksoprettyjjx @kaitieskidmore1 @lukeys-giggle @katie-navarro @crybabyddl @cocopuffs0211 @marvel-ousnesss @blackhood5sos @tessxblxckthorn

Goy tags: @eternalharry @xplrreylo

#luke patterson imagine #luke patterson fanfic #luke patterson x y/n #luke patterson x reader #luke patterson imagines #luke patterson fic #jatp imagine #charlie gillespie fic #charlie gillespie x y/n #charlie gillespie imagines #jatp luke

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