[Day 247]

Testing out lineless style? Ive always wanted to try it :D

Leannan // O.W. (celebration fic)

Request: Congratulations hun! Seriously, slow down xD No, please don't :D so I would like to have Oliver Wood - duh xD, Hogwarts, Enemies to Lovers, Fluff 4. - “Is that my shirt?” (You just captured my Scot baby so well, I couldn't miss it!) Congrats again, hun, take all the time you need! <3 - @heloisedaphnebrightmore​

Fluff 4: “Is that my shirt?”

A/N: Coming from the queen of Oliver fics, this means so much! Thank you! For those that don’t know, Leannan is Scottish Gaelic for ‘sweetheart’. I don’t know whether this reads as enemies to lovers but there is a lot of teasing, however, I’m happy to rewrite if you want it! As always, I hope you enjoy and thank you all so much for 1.5k!!

Pairing: Oliver Wood x Fem!Reader

Warnings: swearing, teasing

Word count: 1.7k

Truthfully, you considered yourself to be a very calm and mature person. There was very little that could rile you into a frenzy, and if it did, you almost always dealt with the problem by finding a solution as quickly as possible.

But you were absolutely certain there was no solution for Oliver Wood.

Since joining the Gryffindor Quidditch Team in your Third Year, he had made it his mission to get on your nerves every practice and every match, or whenever he had a spare moment. The teasing started off innocently enough; but then it evolved into something more and now you both felt at a stalemate.

There was no ill will between you; just teenage stubbornness tied with mutual attraction that neither of you were willing to admit. He liked to challenge you; becoming your rival in so many forms whether it was on the pitch where he would challenge you to races, or in the classroom room where he would test your patience through essay grades.

In so many forms, you could class him as your enemy for the pure fact that he drove you up the wall, but there was the rare occasion where you would catch him watching you across a classroom or the common room, and you had to wonder whether he felt something more.

---------

Sighing to yourself in the changing room, you unzip your bag, pulling out your uniform and setting it on the bench. The day had already started out bad; running late to first lesson after having spilt orange juice down your blouse and then forgetting to submit an essay for your third lesson of the day had your mood lower than it had been all week.

Closing your eyes, you take a deep breath as you begin to get ready for practice. Silently praying that it would be an easy one.

“Leannan,” A known voice sings, “Practice starts in ten.”

Turning, you fix Oliver with an unimpressed look, “I am not your sweetheart, Wood.”

He smirks, leaning against the doorframe, “How did you know I was calling you a sweetheart?”

You pause; wondering how the hell you were going to explain this one. Absolutely refusing to explain that you had spent one evening in the library, scouring through a Scottish Gaelic dictionary until you came across the word. You absolutely refuse to acknowledge how heated your skin felt one you read the translation; how seeing it sent a thrill through you.

“What’s the matter? Cat got your tongue?”

You roll your eyes, “Shove off, Wood. I need to get ready for practice.”

Oliver holds his hand up in surrender, laughing, “I’m going, I’m going.”

You throw a piece of clothing at him, “Go faster.”

“Alright woman, no need to resort to bodily harm.”

“Wood, I asked you to leave and you’re still here. Either you love to annoy me this much or you so desperately want to see me naked, now which is it?”

Oliver splutters at your words; his face a picture as a bright blush creeps his neck, “I’ll see you on the pitch.”

You stifle your laugh as Oliver walks into the doorframe before leaving the girl’s changing room. His slight embarrassment making your day that little bit better. You find yourself thinking of him as you get changed for practice; of his confidence that really does get the better of him sometimes, of his love of quidditch, of how he lights up when he delivers the pre-match speech that the team has memorised but that he will always deliver.

Shaking your head clear of all thoughts of the brown-eyed scot, you grab your broom and head out onto the pitch, joining the rest of the team. You ruffle young Harry’s hair as you walk past him; earning a playful glare in return.

“Have we quite finished?” Oliver admonishes; his gaze fixed on you.

“Yeah, have you quite finished?” Fred parrots.

You elbow him harshly; knocking the breath out of him, “Shut it, Weasley.”

Oliver claps his hands together; gaining the attention of the team. Setting up the plan of action for today’s practice, he blows his whistle – the command to saddle brooms and take off.

It feels as if it’s revenge for your comment in the changing room. Oliver nit-picks every move you take; taking it apart and demonstrating for the team the exact moment where you went wrong and why it should have been avoided. Oliver isn’t being outwardly malicious – he doesn’t have a malicious bone in his body; he’s just placing extra attention on you because of how you reacted in the changing room.

Oliver hadn’t admitted this to anyone; how attractive he found you, but how clueless he felt when it came to approaching you. He could tease you well enough; rile you up and get on your nerves, but he really did like you. You were his Leannan, no matter how much you seemed to despise the nickname.

Practice finishes with you landing back onto the pitch in one smooth motion; hopping off your broom and flipping Oliver off as he shouts for you to come back and talk. If you spoke to him now, you knew you would say something you would come to bitterly regret. Walking away, as you did now, meant that you could cool off and think through things rationally.

As you’re pulling your robes back on, an idea springs to mind. An idea that would definitely repay Oliver for how harsh he was during training.

Your mood brightening once again, a smirk breaks across your face as you hoist your Quidditch bag onto your shoulder and take hold of your broom; this would definitely be a fun prank – one that you couldn’t predict the outcome of, but it was one you also needed particular help with.

--------

At breakfast the following morning, you take a seat next to the Weasley twins, greeting each with a wide smile that only had them questioning your motives.

“Boys, I have an idea and I need your help.”

They both lean closer to you, “This wouldn’t have anything to do with a certain Quidditch captain would it?”

You bite your lip, “It might…”

Fred and George laugh, “What do you need us to do?”

----

Fred and George succeed that very night; pulling young Harry in on the scheme as well – getting him to distract Oliver with numerous questions about Quidditch whilst they snuck into Oliver’s room and stole his spare Quidditch jersey. He would never notice it missing; choosing to wear the same one for each match for luck.

They join you in the common room after having completed the deed; smuggling the jersey to you which you hide underneath the blanket you’re huddled under. Oliver frowns at the three of you; cutting him off on his education for Harry, he shouts over to you, “What would you three be planning?”

You widen your eyes, batting your lashes, “We would never do such a thing.”

Oliver frowns, “I’ll believe it when I see it.”

You place a hand on your heart, “The lack of faith you have in me is astounding, Wood.”

“Leannan, the three of you together can create enough mayhem to shut the school down.”

You grin at the use of his nickname for you, “Then lucky for you we aren’t planning anything,”

Oliver grumbles but says nothing further as he turns back to Harry; the boy looking as captivated as ever by Oliver’s explanations.

“What are you going to do with it?” George asks.

“Burn it? Tear it up? Dye it green?” Fred asks.

You shake your head at all his suggestions; feeling only slightly alarmed, “I’m going to wear it.”

Fred sits back with a huff, “I’d have dyed it green.”

You pat his leg consolingly, “Next time.”

-------

Your plan was to wear Oliver’s Quidditch jersey around Hogsmeade; starting with wearing it to breakfast in the Great Hall. You walk in proudly; winking back at Fred and George as you sit down next to them at the Gryffindor table.

If Oliver notices something, he doesn’t say – he glances your way once through all of breakfast then refuses to catch your eye after that.

You turn to the twins, “What are your plans for Hogsmeade? Room for one more?”

George nods, “We always have room for one more. We’re going to Zonko’s first and then we’ll see where the day takes us.”

You laugh, “That we shall. I’m going to grab some more money, but I’ll meet you in the courtyard?”

With a thumbs up from both of them, you leave the Great Hall, rushing back to the Gryffindor common room. Fred nudges George and points at Oliver who when noticing your absence, made sure to follow you from the room. They both roll their eyes, knowing full well you would not be meeting them in the courtyard.

-------

Returning to the common room after breakfast to grab some last minute money before meeting the twins, you’re pulled to one side by a frustrated looking Oliver.

Frustrated doesn’t seem to cover what Oliver feels at the sight of you in his shirt; he feels confirmation that you hold some feelings for him, but mostly feels desperation at how much he wants to get it off you.

“Is that my shirt?”

You look down at your clothing; your face the picture of innocence when you finally meet his brown eyes, “You know… I think it is.”

Oliver’s hands flex by his sides; an action he only does when he’s getting frustrated and can’t do anything about it, “Why are you wearing my shirt?”

You pull out the hem; reading his quidditch number out loud before saying, “I don’t know, I think it looks pretty good on me. Don’t you?”

Oliver leans in closer; just enough so he can whisper in your ear but far enough where he’s purposefully not touching you, “Leannan, what are you doing?”

You angle your body away from him, “I think you know what I’m doing.”

Oliver’s hands finally leave his side; fiddling with the hem of shirt that’s now draped over your body. With a smirk, he asks, “Just how set are you on going to Hogsmeade today?”

“Why? Got plans for me?”

He chuckles; hands fisting in his shirt, “Leannan, you have no idea.”

**********

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In a Week

Part 3/4 - Snowballs and cigarettes

(Frankie Morales x f!reader)

~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~

Summary: The snows finally stopped and its about time you got to work unburying your car. With your friends all prompting you to move on from your toxic ex you find yourself becoming more and more aware of the kind of person you’d want to be with. And how Frankie was ticking all those boxes.

Authors notes: Ugh okay I was over the max block text so the finale is split into two parts!! But you get them both tonight💕🌻💕 .

Warnings: mentions of toxic relationships, allusions to sex (nothing depicted), PTSD, smoking, drinking, swearing

Tagged: @agingerindenial @icanbeyourjedi

Word count: 4.0k

~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~

Day 4

It had only been three days but you had found yourself in a routine that you hoped you never fell out of. Each morning he’d wake up first and you’d be predictably wrapped around him for another 2 hours or so. He found it hard to believe you were able to wake up before 10am, let alone that you were up at 5am most days but he’d love to be around to see it happen. For the first time, he saw something he’d long given up on. A future with someone else ingrained into his and his daughters life. Maybe it was stupid feeling this way after a few days, but he was old enough to know when he felt a real connection, and he’d never felt as good as he did when he was with you. He would make his feelings known to you, one way or another, he’d regret it forever if he let you slip through his fingers. He just had to find the right time to do it. It had been a long time since you’d woken up with someone in the same bed as you and even longer since the person was someone who made you feel safe and secure. There was something calming about knowing that even if you pushed your freezing cold feet between his calves in the middle of the night he wouldn’t get angry, or push you off he’d just grumble and pull you closer.

It sounded pathetic but it was the nicest a guy had been to you in years. You knew how stupid it was to catch feelings this fast, and it definitely wasn’t like you to feel such strong emotions. Since the funeral you had actively decided to forego them although. This benefited your work, helped you in your field, made you a better doctor, but keeping all your emotions bottled up took its toll. Primarily on your love life. You’d had your fair share of flings with other residents, nurses, friends of friends, but between classes and shift work there wasn’t time. Plus what was the point when you had no idea where you’d be moved to. At least that’s what you told yourself. Then Jonathan came along and you’d let him in, let him know you and you fell for him in the process. Then he’d started dating someone else, told you he didn't realize you were exclusive, and it shattered you completely. You’d pieced yourself back together and once you were better, once you were finally over him, he’d cycle back round to you, determined to keep you on retainer. The whole ordeal had left you tired. You’d never had a real relationship and you were already done with them. You never understood how people would want to live with someone for the rest of their lives until now. Catching feelings had always happened in periphery to your life making it easy to push by a crush by simply avoiding them, but you couldn’t avoid Frankie. Each day you spent trapped inside with him he’d continued to grow on you, cementing your feelings for him tenfold. You yawn and stretch your leg out over Frankies torso propping yourself up onto your elbow so you can reach over him and grab the glass of water on the nightstand. He exhales as if your movement across him is an inconvenience to his meticulous strategy for winning whatever game he was playing on his phone. You take a sip and put the cup back down, rolling off the bed and opening the curtains.

“Hey!” you shout, causing Frankies head to shoot over to you, “It stopped snowing!” you exclaim, gazing out over the parking lot where the snow had fallen. The powder undulating overtop the cars buried beneath it. You stretch your arms up catching an unsavoury whiff coming from your armpits causing you to pull a face. Turning around just in time to see Frankie laughing from the bathroom door.

“Seriously man? Do you have to beat me to everything!” you pout, crossing your arms over your chest.

“Gotta be faster sweetheart.” he says, closing the door behind him. From anyone else the term would have driven you into a rage induced frenzy, but it was endearing not condescending coming from him. You take the time to call Stella, you’d been texting with her since you got stuck but you felt it was time to officially announce your arrival as permanently cancelled.

“Hey girl”

“Hey babe what's going on? You calling with good or bad news?” she asks, a constant bustle evident in the background.

“Don’t shoot the messenger, but only bad news on my end. I am so fucking sorry, I should have just flown down like you said” you offer, leaning back against the window allowing the chill of the outside to cool you off.

“Well this is why you should always listen to me, but i’ll forgive you just this once.” she laughs.

“God I can’t believe the one wedding I actually care about I’m going to miss!” you exasperated, shifting away from the window and flopping down onto the bed.

“Well I definitely won’t miss you, especially considering you’ve already sent a gift.” she teases.

“How, very dare you” you punctuate.

“Yup long con paid off, 10 years I pretended to like you just to get you to buy me a toaster from ebay” Stella laughs.

“You could have just stolen mine after the first year, then you could have had me gone!” you state.

“Ugh a huge mistake!!” she overemphasizes dramatically, causing you both to burst out laughing.

“So….” you say after your giggles subside leaving a gentle ache in your ribs that always occurred when you talked to Stella.

“What?” she asks, sniffling.

“ Did John make it out there?” you ask, in a painfully transparent way.

“Why?” she spits, her tone suddenly lethal. She hated the guy, she was the one who was always left dealing with you after he’d used you up, helping to piece you back together, just in time for him to get a hold on you again.

“He asked about me?” you query, once again failing to convey your intentions.

“I’m not indulging this anymore, it's bad for you. He’s bad for you, there's only so many times I can watch him emotionally manipulate you” she rants.

“Ya, but it's easy and it's so good with him.” you emphasize.

“It’s not easy, take it from someone in an easy relationship, it's not supposed to hurt that much.” she chides, determined to have you see the light.

“But..”

“Nope, I'm drawing the line for you, find someone else. You’re a gorgeous single doctor,

“Almost doctor” you interrupt, but the statement is ignored.

“Aren’t you currently shacked up with one of my stupid brothers friends?”

“Yes? And?” you say, your heart suddenly beating faster as your head turns to see Frankies hat on the nightstand.

“Frankie right? Statue like, soft curls, kind, deep brown eyes? And don’t pretend like you didn’t notice I know you like the back of my hand!”

“So what if I have, doesn't mean..” you whisper, not wanting him to hear you.

“Nope, don’t sell yourself short, I say get cozy with him and finally move on from dickhead McGee, even if it's just for a night, cleanse the palette. Besides, you know he’ll be doing whoever looks his way at my wedding.” you hear a muffled shout “alright I have to go, something about the bridesmaids fighting.”

“Your sisters? Fighting? Who could have seen that coming” you deadpan.

“I know, god I wish you were here.”

“I wish I was as well i'll call tomorrow in case you get cold feet, I have a five point plan”

“I won't” she chimes.

“ I know because you love her”

“And I also love you” she says

“And I love you” you respond before hanging up. Not even a minute after hanging up you get a call from Santiago

“Hey, I just wanted to verbally apologize for trapping you with ‘Fish, though he's definitely one of the better ones to get stuck with.” he says.

“Well that’s good to know” you laugh, rolling your eyes.

“He hasn’t tried anything has he? If he has I'll kill him, and get away with it, you'll have to help me with the body but...” Santiago starts.

“Santi, it's fine he's cool, really sweet, actually,” you offer heat rushing to your face for some unknown reason.

“Good. He touches you ill..” he warns.

“You’ll kill him ya I got it!” you snap, you understood why Santiago felt like he had to play big brother for you but sometimes he was a touch overbearing. “Is John there?” you try and ask casually, failing to head Stellas advice.

“Don’t...” Santi starts, you can practically hear his jaw clench over the phone “you know if I see him tonight i'm gonna knock him out for how he treats you”

“It wasn’t that bad.” you whisper.

“It was, still is, I heard him bragging about how if worse comes to worse he always has his plan D,” he offers, not to hurt you but to try and free you from the cycle.

“That dick. You know what Stellas right, fuck him!” you exclaim with a newfound determination to rid him from your life.

“Oh my god, are you finally seeing the light?” Santi asks “Praise the lord!” He shouts up into the sky.

“Ya I guess so” you say staring at Frankie as he dries his hair with the towel. “I gotta go, see you soon.”

“Not soon enough” he laughs as you hang up.

“Whose that?” Frankie asks, still curious about who you’d been hoping to see at the wedding and what they’d done to earn your affection.

“Pope!” you say with a smile, pushing your back off the bed and sitting up.

“Threatening to kill me?” Frankie predicts.

“Ya we have a plan” you murmur.

“We?” he asks, a twinkle in his eye and his mouth upturned at the sides.

“Well he'll kill you but, I cant have him go to jail so i'll have to hide your body.” you explain

“Good glad that got sorted” he says, his smile now in full effect.

“I'll go grab some breakfast” you say.

“No ill get it, you’re always getting it, plus gives you time to shower, I can smell you from here.” He prods, grabbing the key.

“Rude!” you yell out after him.

He's back when you exit the shower

“Oh thank you, you say grabbing the plate form him”

“Just what the doctor ordered, hey?” he asks, smiling stupidly big.

“Ouuuf that that was bad truly apologize to me” He laughs at how serious your face gets “You're laughing? I had to listen to that joke and you're laughing?” you say through a mouthful of eggs. “Here's something that'll wipe that stupid smile off your face, snow stops which means we have to clear off my car.”

“Using the royal we are we?” he asks

“Think of it as repayment for the pun,” you say waving your fork in his face

“How will we be clearing it off?” he asks, leaning over the counter.

“Brush” you say, as if it's obvious

“Where's the brush?” he asks, resting his chin on the back of his hands and smiling sweetly at you, waiting for an answer.

“In the….oh” you say, face dropping when you realize that the brush was in the car currently buried under a snow pile.

“Not so smart now” he laughs pushing back off the counter taking your empty plate with him, washing it up for you.

“Well I guess we just have to get to the door with our hands then” you say smiling.

“Once again, about this we,” he says, drying his hands on the dish towel, turning to see a dramatic pout plastered across your face.

“Fine, I'll only help because I think you may disappear in the snow if you go in alone” he responds, the truth was, he couldn't deny you.

You both get dressed into the most winter proof clothes you had, neither of you having packed for a snowy expedition. As you exit the room you see him grab a pack of cigarettes he’d been hiding, not wanting you to see his worst traits.

“Those will kill you, you know,” you say, causing him to roll his eyes dramatically.

“Okay mom” he laughs grabbing the lighter despite your disapproving glare,

“You have a daughter to think about” you say, feeling like you'd be letting your profession down by giving up so easily.

“It's why I smoke, the safest way to calm the nerves while staying clean” he murmurs with a look on his face that is enough to get you to drop it for now. You weren't about to pry into his struggle with addiction and you certainly weren’t one to judge, you’d faced similar issues after your brothers passing.

“I used to smoke,” you confess as the elevator doors close in front of you both.

“Seriously?” he remarks, not able to believe it.

“Pack a week for about a year” you say, slowly nodding your head as the two of you walk through the foyer towards the parking lot.

“You quit?” He asks, impressed.

“Ya I don’t think it was long enough to form a habit. When did you start?” you offer as you move your legs through the snow, it was dense your legs would be sore tomorrow.

“What? Are you gonna assess the state of my lungs?” Frankie laughs, moving easily through the snow you were struggling so hard against.

“Yes, but i'll only tell you the results if you want to know”

“Few years back, after...” he stops himself before confessing the worst thing that ever happened in his life.

“The mission” you finish for him, remembering how Pope had picked up similar habits once he finally returned home. “You were there with Santi?” you question

“He told you about it?” he asks, sterner than you’d seen him before, he was afraid that you knew what a monster he was. You shake your head, no and he thanks the gods. “You think i'm going to?” He queries lighting up a cigarette and taking a drag, making sure not to blow it out anywhere near you.

“I don’t know, maybe. It’s the one thing he wont tell me about, figured it would be easier for you if you were talking to a stranger about it.”

“Not much of a stranger now” he laughs, but there was something behind his eyes, a similar sadness that you saw with Santi when he talked about it. Your thoughts are interrupted when something cold hits you in the face, your mouth drops open, your forehead scrunches in disbelief.

“Shit, I wasn’t aiming for your face I swear!” he looks up panicked

“I guess it's what I get for asking so many questions” you say, hand still over your face playing into it as you formulate your attack.

“No, oh my god! No! It wasn't because of that, let me see” he says, you let your hands drop and you smile wickedly up at him. Before he has time to react, you rub a handful of snow into his face.

“Oh... you're gonna pay for that.” he draws out, wiping the snow from his face.

After 15 minutes of all out war, and a brief truce that was to be officially signed once back inside you managed to get to the door handle and lean into the back seat grabbing out the brush. You offer it to Frankie, but he's already started clearing off the rest of the car with his arms.

“Hey can you grab my spare charger out of the compartment there?” you say cleaning off the trunk, the front doors now accessible.

“Ya, holy shit is this a knife?” he asks, pulling out a knife.

“Maybe.” You say staring into his eyes as his mouth hangs open in amusement. “For safety, I didn't know who I'd be driving up with! You coulda been a murderer” you explain palms up.

“And you were planning on what? shanking me?” he laughs a huge smile on his face, weirdly endeared by your thought process.

“Only if I had to.” You say chuckling between shivers, the cold now seeping through your makeshift snowsuit hitting against the sweat you’d worked up.

“You want it?” He offers.

“No i'm good, thanks”

“Because you don’t think I'm a murderer or because you have another one hidden in the room already?” he laughs, but he stops when you tilt your head slightly and raise your eyebrows, averting your eyes.

“Wait, do I need this knife?” he calls as you trudge back through the snow.

You both change into less sweaty attire and you settle into the couch turning on to watch the latest forensic files rerun. You shiver as you sit down having caught a chill. Noticing you shaking, Frankie goes to the wardrobe and grabs down a spare blanket throwing one at you so it lands directly over your head. He laughs when he sees you slowly turn towards him beneath the blanket, like someone in a makeshift ghost costume.

“Excuse me!” you laugh

“Hey you should be thanking me, can't have you freezing to death.” he says, “Are you asleep under there?” he asks, when you don't respond

“I'm not a cat! I don't fall asleep when someone throws a blanket over me!” He's not paying attention to what he's doing and the bottle in his hand shatters against the counter, a shard slicing his hand open.

“Fucking shit.” you him sigh.

“Are you okay?” You ask maneuvering out from under your blankets to see Frankie in the kitchen, glass on the floor and blood coming down his arm.

“Wow you're out of my sight for 2 seconds and you maim yourself” you say laughing, stopping when you see the panicked look in his eye, the event evidently triggering something deep in his psyche. You quickly stand up and he goes to move towards you.

“No don't move Frankie, stay where you are.” you reassure softly, watching as his eyes lay into your own, his breathing calmer now “You're in socks, can't have you cutting your dancing feet” you say.

“You’ve heard of my dancing feet,” he says, grounding himself again.

“Only bad things” you say, throwing him a pair of shoes that he carefully puts on before moving toward the closet where the broom is “No come here, let me see your hand. The mess can wait, you're more important,” you stress leading him over to the couch and sitting him down.

“Wow, first time I'll be able to afford professional health care “ he jokes as you take his hands in your own.

“Ow” he says when you press down onto the hand to assess the damage.

“It's fine, not deep enough for stitches, should heal up on its own. I still want to clean it though, to stop any infection.” You return with a small bottle of over priced vodka opening it and dabbing some onto a cotton pad. He doesn't flinch when the alcohol cleans the wound and he watches as you bandage his hand up.

“You carry a med pack with you on every trip?” he queries, but you don’t hear him you’re too focused on wrapping his hand.

“There! good as new,” you say standing up and cleaning up the glass on the floor. “Hey did you bring a swimsuit?” you ask, dumping the glass into some newspaper that was left in the room.

“Why?” He asks.

“Answer the question Frankie” you say, folding the paper around the shards before placing it into the trash.

“Yes, you wanna go hang out at the pool with the fifty families stuck here?”

“Ya. You don't? Seriously this room is wildly expensive and has a huge jacuzzi tub, I'm getting in your welcome to join, but bathing suits are mandatory.” you offer.

“I was gonna get in fully clothed,” he offers, not missing a beat.

“Perfect even better”

As per usual he beats you to the punch and settles into the tub that was more akin to a hot tub than a bath, he wanted to get in first partially to annoy you and partially so his body wouldn’t be on full display, he wasn't as jacked as he once was and he’d become insecure about certain areas that he’d let go once his kid came along. He watches as you walk in and his eyes can't help but follow your figure around the room, a beautiful person behind a beautiful personality, he thanks the universe for placing him into your orbit.

“That why they call you catfish?” you ask drawing him from his daydream back into an equally pleasing reality.

“What?” he responds, blushing at having been called out on his gawking.

“Cause your mouth hangs open like a fish out of water when you're zoned out” you smirk, lowering yourself down into the tub.

“Rude” he says splashing after you settle in.

“Alright, Frankie, what is it?” you ask, causing his face to look up to you “what's your deal, apart from smoking? You gotta have flaws”

“Wouldn’t you like to know.” he charms

“Sinister” you laugh, but he doesn't, you reach your foot up tapping his cheek with it,

“Disgusting,” he chuckles, grabbing it and rubbing the arch before pushing it back into the water.

“God, I miss the ocean” you confess, “ I hate the city sometimes.”

“You’re not planning on staying in Chicago after you're done?”

“Nope, gonna get myself out to the coast, or at least somewhere without winters.” you say stretching your arms out across the tub. “How about you, are you planning on staying?”

“ Probably, no reason to leave, plus it's close to my mom so she can take care of Arianna when I'm at work, though I wouldn't be opposed to moving if the opportunity presented itself she's young enough that it wouldn’t be too hard.” he says, wanting you to know that if you asked, hed follow you anywhere.

“Arianna, beautiful name. Did you pick it?” you ask looking up when a few minutes of silence pass. As you do you notice that the somber look from early had returned. “You okay?” you ask.

“I don't deserve her, I don’t deserve something so good.” he states, suddenly realizing he didn’t deserve someone like you either. You wouldn’t be sitting in the tub with him if you knew what he’d done.

“Frankie that's not true” you reassure

“You don't know the shit I've done. I'm not... I'm not a good person,” he says, still not looking over to you.

“Well, I…” you begin to refute.

“Seriously, I've done bad things… awful things'' he clears his throat, afraid to look at you, afraid you’d be terrified by him.

“People make bad mistakes, but that doesn't make them irredeemable, not if they are willing to change. You understand what you did was bad, that says something.” you reassure, knowing the guilt was likely left over from the military.

“Well, wise words coming from someone who's never done anything bad”

“You don't know me that well Frankie, I’ve done my fair share of stupid things, crappy things to numb the pain. It's what we do to make up for those shitty actions that count. At every turn, you’ve shown me that you're not an evil person. Everything I’ve seen is good, and funny and incredibly kind.” you finish and you continue to nudge him with your foot until he finally cracks a smile.

“Well now you're smiling again, my missions complete and it's time for bed” you say stepping out of the tub and drying off, unaware that you’d just made Frankie fall even harder for you. His eyes helplessly following you as you leave the bathroom.

“Since I'm an outpatient, does that mean I get the good side of the bed?” he calls out after you. You roll your eyes but let him have it, you preferred the sleeping situation the way it was.

Hi Bunnie! Can I please have a drabble where Taichi, Tenma, and Juza (basically the Ō High trio) are caught up in a big argument with their soft!s/o and how they make up afterwards? So basically angst with hints of fluff at the end. Thank you so much!

ah... angst is my favorite trope to write! thank you so much for this request~ i just know i’m gonna have so much #Fun ✨! i hope you enjoy it, have a great rest of your day and i love you!!! (･ω<)☆

summary: love is a choice, not a feeling

warnings: angst, arguments, anxiety, blood, break–up(?), bruises, falling out of love, fighting, lying, mental illness, panic attack, physical violence

author’s note: each of three (3) stories follow lyrics to who by lauv ft. bts !! ♡ making this a song fic :D none of taichi, tenma, or juza’s storys align with one another in the same universe, fyi! please be conscious of tw warnings listed above and know you are loved no matter what *ଯ( ॢᵕ꒶̮ᵕ)ॢഒ*♡ + dialogue from tenma’s part follows iu & oh hyuk’s conversation in the song, “can’t love you anymore” for anyone curious :)

word count: 1,438 (taichi), 1,114 (tenma), 1,235 (juza)

music: i don’t know – seventeen (taichi), can’t love you anymore – iu ft. oh hyuk (tenma), if you do – got7 (juza)

who.

🍁🛹 nanao taichi

OUTLINES OF YOUR EYES AND VISIONS OF YOU

I THINK I NEED A MINUTE

TO FIGURE OUT WHAT IS, WHAT ISN’T

Inferiority, that was what Taichi fell victim to. It didn’t matter where he was or what he did, Taichi would never change to be good enough. Not for the stage, not for Mankai, and... not for you. How could you love Taichi when he couldn’t even love himself?

You had no reason to love him, not after all he’s done, not when he couldn’t be more. Even when Taichi was lacking, you still chose him time and time again. But, why? You had to have some ulterior motive, some plan, some elaborate scheme, to use him—to break him like he deserved.

With time came paranoia, and with that came distrust. No matter how much his heart beat for you, Taichi’s overwhelming fears paralyzed him to the point of no return. What was real? What wasn’t? Did you love him for who he was, or who you thought he was?

Who was Nanao Taichi? Who were you?

THESE CHOICES AND VOICES,

THEY’RE ALL IN MY HEAD

After all, was it really okay for Taichi to do this? To accept this love even when he didn’t believe he deserved it? Was it okay for Taichi to wholeheartedly say “I love you” first even if he was aware you could have anyone else? Being in love with you was both a blessing and a curse, because while it was the happiest he had ever been, Taichi was afraid it was all a lie.

Taichi didn’t know if he’d be able to recover if you ended up leaving. Pathetic, right? He woke up every morning searching for comfort and peace in your presence, and fell asleep every night to dream of your existence. You were his source of love in all aspects of any reality, no matter where he found himself. What would happen if you disappeared one day and never came back? What would Taichi do?

Could a person like him be in love like this? Taichi couldn’t help but begin to doubt your intentions even if his heart knew you would never be a bad person like that. Taichi’s insecurities had taken over his mindset for the worse, and its effects on your relationship was becoming more and more parasitic by the day. Both of you could see it even if it took a while for anyone to acknowledge it.

When the argument happened, it was a long awaited conversation meant to be had.

SOMETIMES YOU MAKE ME FEEL CRAZY

SOMETIMES I SWEAR I THINK YOU HATE ME LIKE

You found Taichi at his breaking point. Where the thoughts became too loud, where he couldn’t hear you over his own anxiety. Even if Taichi was your boyfriend, it almost felt like he was a stranger with how little you saw him. Every excuse in the book was used just so he wouldn’t see you, and you wanted to know why once and for all what was wrong.

You soon found out everything that made up Taichi was wrong. You nearly didn’t recognize him, tired and unable to fake a smile as well as before. His room reflected his chaotic state of mind, messy and unorganized with no coherence whatsoever. Taichi sat at his desk, mindlessly fidgeting with a yo–yo with his eyes blankly staring ahead. Minature origami surrounded every surface to his name, and you realized how severe Taichi’s mental health had become.

A pang of pain struck your heart when you called his name, only for Taichi to not respond. It took a moment before Taichi shot up, stumbling out of his chair to greet you with an exhausted grin. Taichi held up his arms, about to give you a hug like always. “O–Oh! I didn’t see you there! I thought we had our date tomorrow—”

“Taichi, are you okay?”

Taichi’s smile wavered then fell, his fist clenching around his plastic yo–yo so hard to the point you questioned how it didn’t crack. His knuckles were white and his eyes anxiously watched for every little change in your facial expression, as if waiting for some sign of anger.

“Of course I am, why wouldn’t I be?” Taichi lied through his teeth, moving forward to put his hand on yours. You moved back, and that seemed to put him on the edge, making Taichi almost feel betrayed by your hesitation.

“We... we haven’t seen each other in so long... You always cancel on me, saying you have practice. What is this, then? Have you even been going to rehearsal?” You snapped, all your frustrations of being ghosted boiling over. As you began pacing the room, you narrowly missed the clothes strewn on the floor and knick knacks Taichi must’ve fidgeted with.

“N–No, but...” Taichi gulped, pulling at his dirty shirt collar, willing himself to breathe. Did it suddenly get so difficult to find air? Any other time, Taichi would’ve made a joke about how you made him breathless, but his heart was pounding too fast and everything was dizzying. Before Taichi could ask you to stand still and give his head a break, you kept going, not able to keep it together anymore.

“Why have you been ignoring me? It’s okay if you need space, but, let me know! One day, you just disappeared and never came back.” “But, I’m right here.” “No, you’re not. Not, as the Taichi I know.”

Silence hung over you two uncomfortably, the atmosphere tense. The moment you turned to leave, Taichi broke.

I NEED A WALK, I NEED TO GET OUT OF HERE

‘CAUSE I NEED TO KNOW

“Who said you knew me?”

You paused, holding onto the door knob before slowly turning, meeting Taichi’s eyes. “Do you actually love me? Or, am I some charity case to you?” Taichi laughed, but it was humorless like everything was to him recently. You were quick to respond, but Taichi was faster, letting everything tormenting his mind out into the real world.

“The moment I’m not who you dreamt of, I’m in the wrong. It’s my fault, I know! Goddamn it, I know!” Taichi’s voice cracked as he fell back into his desk chair, trying to maintain his breathing to be even despite the tears. “I love you, so much. But, do you feel the same? How do I know you’re not lying? Why would anyone choose to love me? I don’t... I don’t deserve you, even if I love you.”

When you rushed in front of him, recognizing the signs of a panic attack, Taichi fell forward to grip your shirt, his fists shaking and head bowed low. Taking in a shuddering sob, Taichi tried to focus on the sound of your voice to be okay.

“I... I never wanted you to see me like this. I’m so sorry, I’m sorry.” Taichi cried after suppressing his emotions after so long of feeling numb. You rested your hands on his shoulder, trying your best to encourage him to breathe.

“Taichi, it’s okay. Can you hear me?” You asked, to which Taichi feebly nodded with his eyes squeezed shut. “Okay, can you please breathe after me?” You exaggerated your deep breaths in and out, eventually helping Taichi to mimic your pattern and stabilizing his anxiety for the moment.

Taichi thought when worst came to worst, you would already be gone. You didn’t run away even when Taichi’s anxiety got the best of him, you stayed. Taichi clung onto you a little bit tighter at that thought, even if he didn’t need to.

Maybe, you did love him.

After a while, you pulled back and Taichi’s arms automatically looked for you. Taichi hid his face in your shirt again, exhaling quietly at your warmth. You ruffled his hair affectionately, petting it softly to remind him you were there. Taichi was still somewhat shaking, drained from the panic attack and how strong it was.

“Taichi, I’m going to take a walk, okay?” When Taichi raised his head, eyes wide at the fear of you using this as a reason to leave, you placed a gentle kiss on his forehead.

“I’ll come back, I promise. When I do, let’s talk about everything. No more secrets, okay?” You reasoned, making Taichi eventually nod. You two linked pinkies, making it a promise that this was a new start for both of you.

Right before you closed the door, Taichi called out to you, weakly smiling. “I love you.” You didn’t hesitate to respond, knowing your love for Nanao Taichi to be true. “I love you, too.”

Taichi believed you this time.

🌻☀️ sumeragi tenma

WHO ARE YOU?

‘CAUSE YOU’RE NOT THE PERSON I FELL IN LOVE WITH, BABY

“Hello?”

Tenma could tell it was you on the other end of the line, with your heartbreaking silence ruining the city for him. Leaning his head on the glass of the taxi window, Tenma watched the dazzling and glamorous skyscrapers pass by slowly in the late night traffic. While the driver tapped his fingers against the steering wheel, the star power of Japan’s biggest idols were advertised in every billboard high in the sky. Tenma waited for your answer to his sighed greeting, catching his own face smirking back at him from a commercial playing near by.

“Where are you?” You finally asked, your voice just the same as Tenma’s: exhausted. What had you done all day that made you this tired? Even Tenma didn’t know... weren’t boyfriends supposed to know? Tenma looked around, lost in the middle of Tokyo, a city that he could never keep up with despite being born in the center of it all.

“In a taxi.”

“Are you almost home?” Your voice cracked towards the end, and Tenma quickly sat up once he realized something was wrong. Before he could ask what happened, Tenma suddenly leaned his head back onto the seat, closing his eyes. He couldn’t bear to accept what he had done—or, not done—this late into the evening.

“Oh god, I’m sorry.”

WHO ARE YOU?

‘CAUSE SOMETHING HAS CHANGED

“For what?” You both knew the answer, however. Tenma couldn’t bring himself to say it out loud. The date displayed upon the dashboard of the cab seemed to remind Tenma of everything he had done wrong. It was your one–year anniversary, and Tenma had forgotten until now.

“Just, for everything.” Tenma forced out, his visage suddenly no longer the splitting image of teen fame anymore. He looked much more normal, no longer sporting a wealthy air to him but rather a troubled kid with the public eye watching his every move. Luckily, no paparazzi stood outside his vehicle’s tinted windows, flashing their cameras to publish any negative headlines. Instead, it was just Tenma, his taxi driver, and you waiting for him at home.

“Please come home, Ten.” You whispered, sounding like you were begging for this one small thing from him out of his busy schedule. Tenma ran his hand through his hair, trying not to lash out and hit the closest thing around him. He didn’t need a scandal to his name, especially since that meant ruining your reputation and Tenma had already made you hurt enough. Acting like the perfect romantic boyfriend was so, so easy on screen... how come he couldn’t do it in real life?

“Why should I?” Tenma angrily retorted, and that’s when he knew he made the biggest mistake of his life. You couldn’t hide it this time, and a pained cry was muffled behind your phone as you tried to not care as much. Tenma didn’t know why he snapped at you when all he felt was frustration and shame at himself.

“Am I not a good enough reason to stay?”

“Of course you are—”

“Then, why won’t you come home?”

“...”

“Do you love me?”

I do, but I don’t deserve you. “I left my wallet back at the studio. I might not make it back tonight.”

YOU’RE NOT THE SAME

I HATE IT

“Goodnight, then.”

“Tenma, wait—by the way... Nevermind.”

“What is it?”

“I don’t think we’re in love anymore, Tenma.”

Tenma opened his eyes, staring at the ceiling of the taxi as it slowly moved forward. Why was it so blurry? Tenma thought, pulling his hand back only reveal a tear upon his finger. He was crying in public, how could a Sumeragi do this? But, Tenma couldn’t stop, he simply just dropped his cell phone into the seats and listened for the click of the call ending. It came after a few moments or so, and Tenma could feel a pair of eyes glancing at him from the review mirror.

Before Tenma could tell him he couldn’t do autographs at the moment, the driver silently passed him a tissue. Tenma took it gratefully, trying not to sob in front of a complete stranger. The driver seemed satisfied before he turned off the radio in the background, clearing his throat before speaking.

“What’s the matter, son? Do you want to talk?” He asked, but it didn’t sound ill–intentioned like an interviewer. It held a fatherly tone, one that automatically made Tenma want to trust him. Taking a minute to compose himself, Tenma slowly began retelling what had happened during his most recent call, his hands still shaking from the aftermath. As traffic stalled, the driver listened to Tenma’s relationship problems carefully before sighing, tapping his fingers against the wheel.

“Boy, how old are you?”

“Sixteen, sir.”

“You are too young to be this heartbroken.” The driver said, pausing to turn and gesture for the car to pass them. “Well, first thing’s first, do you love them?”

“With all my heart, sir.” Tenma responded without hesitation, knowing his love for you was truth.

“Then, why didn’t you say so back then?” The driver commented exasperatedly, his old wisdom and infinite experience with relationships making Tenma’s boyish actions seem like child’s play. Tenma sighed, putting his face in his hands as he admitted the inevitable that had been eating away at him for a while now.

I’M SICK OF WAITING FOR LOVE

I KNOW YOU’RE NOT THE ONE

“They deserve better. All I can give them is love, but, even I can’t do that right. What if I’m not the one for them even if I love them?”

“Listen, boy, and listen good. They love you for one reason only: because it’s you. They chose to love you, not anyone else. You may not be the future, but you’re the one right now. Isn’t that enough?”

Tenma truly took in the words, feeling a sense of comfort he didn’t know he needed after all this time. Without wasting a second, Tenma rapidly passed a large sum of bills with the most excessive tip ever, profusely thanking the driver. Before the taxi driver could refuse such money from a young teen, Tenma opened the car door and left, slamming it shut with random adrenaline.

The driver stuck his head out the window, yelling down the street, “Where the hell are you going, kid?!”. Tenma looked over his shoulder, already halfway down the sidewalk with his phone screen open to your contact. He smiled, not his classic Sumeragi grin, but a true, genuine smile filled with hope to make things right.

“To go celebrate my one year anniversary!”

🍁🍰 hyodo juza

FEELIN’ HYPTONIZED BY THE WORDS THAT YOU SAID

DON’T LIE TO ME, JUST GET IN MY HEAD

Juza hated everything to do with fighting. You could never count on Juza to throw the first punch, to start something with someone, to look for trouble anytime. Yet, you couldn’t help but despise his violence, even if it was provoked.

Juza had too many scars on his fists to forget his reputation around O High, but he didn’t mean to hurt anybody. Especially, not you. But, how could Juza say that when he came to see you after every back end alley way fight? It hurt you to see your boyfriend like this, used as some entertainment for no good thugs. Juza fell to the bait every single time, no matter what you said to convince him otherwise.

Juza promised he’d never hurt you, but how could he keep getting into physical fights like this?

WHEN THE MORNING COMES, YOU’RE STILL IN MY BED

BUT IT’S SO, SO COLD

You couldn’t sleep last night, not when Juza showed up at your door, bruised and dazed. You knew how strong of a fighter Juza was, so his opponent must’ve been formidable if he could barely find his way to your house. It was too late for a school night, but here he was, finally deciding to ask you for help.

“Sorry, I wouldn’t have come, but...” Juza raised his hand, the bandage messily done and already falling off. Juza was always amatuer at first aid for some reason, and you could see the rough cuts underneath the blood–stained cloth. You couldn’t leave him alone at god knows what hour, so you invited him inside.

Juza made sure to never let it become a habit to rely on you, so you helped out whenever you could, even if it pained you to see him so hurt like this. Underneath the yellow bathroom light barely illuminating the cramped space, you rummaged in your cabinets for the first aid kit as Juza sat on the closed toilet, fidgeting with his school uniform jacket.

When your eyes lingered on the torn hem of his blazer for a moment too long, he ducked his head to focus on your bathtub curtain. “Better not to ask.” Juza simply stated, and you believed him. You held in a sigh and took out the minature white box to start working.

Juza didn’t flinch whenever you disinfected his wounds, and you wondered how much pain he really felt. When you asked him to stay (more for your sake than his), Juza agreed and thanked you softly. Seeing such a sweet boy bandaged in your bathroom nearly made you cry, so you just nodded and kissed the band aid by his lips.

Juza waited until you were fully asleep until he closed his eyes. “I’m sorry.” Juza whispered out loud.

You woke up to Juza still sleeping, his breath quiet and arm wrapped around you gently. You were about to smile, but you couldn’t bring yourself to after seeing his bruises had gotten even worse.

How could you keep doing this when it took everything in you not to cry from Juza getting hurt?

WHO ARE YOU?

‘CAUSE YOU’RE NOT THE PERSON I FELL IN LOVE WITH, BABY

Juza didn’t come to you after that. Perhaps Juza knew how affected you were by his late night challenges, or he couldn’t wake up to your disappointment anymore, but he was gone. During the day, you attended classes with O High’s delinquent as usual. However, after school hours weren’t yours anymore. It must’ve been hierarchy season, where arrogant boys thought they had a shot against the Hyodo Juza.

Even if Juza didn’t come by anymore, you still couldn’t sleep. How could you when all you thought about was if Juza was okay? Did he make it back to the Mankai dorms that night? Who’s making sure he’s okay? Is he even okay? Every time you closed your eyes for a split second, you’d see Juza’s gentle smile with a band aid on the corner of his lips. Day became night and it was all the same, since you were awake to experience it all.

You kicked off your blankets, throwing your pillow off your face as it landed with a thud on the other side of your pitch black room. Turning on your phone screen, your tired gaze read the time of 1 A.M. Juza was surely still awake, it wouldn’t hurt to just call him... right? You unlocked it as your finger hovered over Juza’s contact, hesitating.

What would you even say? That you missed him? Did Juza even miss you? You called Juza anyways, anxiously listening to the rings go through before hitting voicemail. Juza always answered your calls before... what happened?

“Meet me soon. We need to talk, you know where to find me.”

WHO ARE YOU?

‘CAUSE SOMETHING HAS CHANGED, YOU’RE NOT THE SAME, I HATE IT

You were right to bring your first aid kit.

Behind the fence was a sunset casting a boy’s shadow across the pavement. Juza hopped the gate easily, landing beside you and avoiding your judgement in the process. You knew exactly why—all because of that unmistakable mark on his face. He couldn’t even hide it.

“Heard your voicemail. Is everything okay?” Juza roughly cleared his throat, settling to lean next to you. You shook your head, unable to find the words in the moment. You just held your hand out and Juza’s put his on top of it automatically, fingers tensing before holding yours. When Juza squeezed your hand once, you wished he could be with you forever, away from all that violence and high school fights.

“You didn’t answer my call. Why?” You questioned, straight to the point. Juza never lied to you, so he looked away and frowned, trying to phrase it in a way so you wouldn’t worry. “Better if—” “If I don’t know, right?” You interrupted with a sharp tone. Juza winced, knowing your anger was justified.

“Juza... I’m so tired.” You started, knowing it was both physically and mentally. “I love you, but I don’t know if I can do this anymore.”

Juza’s eyes widened, standing up straight and putting both your hands in his. You shuddered and tried to keep your breath steady, looking towards the ground. You never noticed how scuffed his shoes were, you wondered what they’ve seen.

“What? I thought we were happy, I love you—”

“Do you really? Then, why do you keep fighting?”

Juza didn’t have an answer. Even he didn’t know himself.

I’M SICK OF WAITING FOR LOVE

I KNOW YOU’RE NOT THE ONE

“I can’t be with you if I don’t even know if you’re okay.”

“I always win—”

“That doesn’t matter! I just want you to be safe, why do you entertain them? What would your family think?!”

“Don’t. Don’t... bring them up.”

“Juza... this isn’t right for you. Please, give it up.”

“I can’t lose—”

“So, you’re choosing to lose me, instead?”

You didn’t wait around this time. “Call me when you change your life for the better.” You left, leaving behind a boy with a broken heart this time.

Juza stared at his hands, their surfaces uneven and calloused from all his years of violence. Something had to change, Juza couldn’t lose you.

When you received a call from Hyodo Juza, you accepted it.



The Cheater and The Bear Katsuki Bakugou x Reader

10/6/21: PLSSSSS THANK YOU FOR THE SUPPORT ON THIS FIC BUT I HATE IT. I love the plot but i hate how i brought on the story towards the end, its boring, quick and sloppy as well, sorry for that. Ill touch it up...later🦖🦕

A/N: Kinktober, I dont know when Ill be encouraged/inspired enough to finish it, besides its obviously already overdue. This was written in a little under 5 hours and I think its pretty good.

The Angst isnt too bad, a bit of a weak ending but its alright.

F/F= Fav Food F/A=Fav Animal F/C=Fav Colour F/D=Fav Drink

Fandom: Boku No Hero Acadamia (My Hero Acadamia

Genre: Angst

Warnings/Contains: Angst. Slight/mentions of; Insomnia, Cheating, Abuse and Death(Reader), Sicknesses(Unspecified) and Suicude(Not directly)

Word Count: 1,934

Angst Level: 2-3

—

Bakugou and Y/n have been dating since they graduated college, they live together and Bakugou has been coming home late because “his boss is asking him to do extra hours” y/n being a good girlfriend, stays up and waits for him to get home so she can help him calm down from the foul attitude he’d usually have.

—

Trying not to fall asleep most the time, she would rarely get some sleep just to make sure he’s alright.

What he really does while his GIRLFRIEND is slowly falling ill for his sake is gradually getting closer to his coworker, spending the late nights with her and not his own girlfriend.

—

Slowly, week after week he starts recognising the late hours he’d yell at y/n for ‘Not minding her own business’ when she asks ‘Where he was’ or ‘How he was’, he’d notice his coworker being nothing like y/n, for example; when y/n would hug him, he’d feel warm inside, not with her.

When y/n would compliment him, he could tell she meant it, but she didnt even bother to. When y/n would wait for him and care for him, though she didnt? It just wasnt the same at all, it felt useless, he felt weird, sad in fact, he didnt know how he felt but he knew that if he looked into the e/c eyes of the person he loved; he would practically fall apart.

—

Checking the mail when he arrived home to see a letter from their local doctor to his y/n and opening it to see that his girlfriend had a bad condition with no possible ‘cure’ or ‘last resort’ to help with her condition caused by stress and insomnia he was scared, he rushed inside the house, stressfully slamming the door shut and walking into the living room to find his what looked like a now fully alert girlfriend with dark bags under her widened eyes with her hair a little messy, she tried to keep it tamed, but the first thing she still asked him was if he was alright, then she checked his forehead for a temperature while he stared speechless at her, mouth ajared and eyes wide with regret, sadness, anything in remorse “Youre sick and you didnt tell me?” He managed to mutter out after grabbing a soft hold onto her hands, something he hadnt done in a while because all his touches to her were violent and dangerous, the way he just spoke to her was the calmest in weeks, months even because he had been noticing the raggedness in his throat whenever he left to work.

She looked down, sadly, “I tried telling you but you told me I was just lying and being selfish..” his breath hitched realising that she wouldn’t live because of him.

Sure she told him she was fine and he didnt need to worry or that it wasnt his fault but that only made him realise how selfless she was, how much she really loved him and how idiotic he was, he finally realised what an idiot he was, a dirty unloyal cheater is what he called himself, undeserving of the very person he vaguely remembered promising to himself that he would give his life and propose to, because, because? He didnt remember because his mind was poisened with the thoughts of the nights he spent with someone else.

He knew that the memories would rush into his mind either after she died or while he tried his best to care for her during her last few days, when he couldve been doing this for until they grew old together.

He didnt remember why he did what he did but he knew that would be the greatest regret of his life; destined to burn into his mind while he recited her very words about moving on and living his life as strong as he always did or at least now could-though she didnt say that last part herself, he knew its what he knows wont stay out of his mind.

—

And so the days went by, he had stayed home from work to comfort her while in denial about the inevitable death ((Unus Annus👀)) coming to her.

—

He gave as much love to her that he could, made her the food she desperately needed, made her feel as needed as she was to him, bathed her himself and made her feel comfortable.

Even when she knew he was cheating on her she never stopped loving him, making sure HE was alright even when her very own health was slowly dropping as the weeks passed.

She knew what he did and she still didnt stop caring for him and his health, not her own. She shuffled and shivered in his embrace, causing him to adjust the blanket on her while smiling softly, the other rested on her back hugging her closer to him.

When her breathing evened once again he continued thinking, ‘Was it worth it?’ He would sometimes think to himself while brushing her hair.

He remembered the time he asked her if he was that worth it that she would sacrifice her health for;

‘Was I that worth it?’ He asked her while he adjusted the f/a bag on her back, to which she sadly looked down and said ‘You werent supposed to find out, When that letter arrived I was supposed to leave after seeing how bad my condition is,’ he stared down at her in shock as she continued,

“If I had gotten to the letter before you and left it would all be a little better..you wouldve forgotten me and moved on, I know you wouldve. I didnt want to bother you anymore, so I figured it’d be better if I left and probably went and lived with Hanta or Jirou instead of dying and leaving my body for you to find..I didnt want to cause so much trouble for you..’ His eyed watered and so did hers when she looked up at him..

—

Driving her to what she knew would be her last festival and what he denied it to be, he held her hand as if it would be the last time he would ever get the chance to.

—

She pulled him weakly by the hand, taking him from ride to ride—while he complained about how it might not be safe enough for her to ride, she didnt listen though, she still dragged him on, the cycle kept on going with y/n taking him on rides wether he worried about her safety or not, she took him to get some food and candy from time to time, she even asked him to win the f/c bear for and he nodded.

—

They watched the fireworks with her arms wrapped around her new bear and her bag and his wrapped around her, he watched as she looked up at the bright lights in the sky, he noticed how they reflected in them.

—

When they got home, she didnt tell him that she felt more unwell than usual, she just told him that ‘I had a great night, ‘Suki. I really love you, you know?’ She hugged him while he wondered where this came from but didnt take much mind as he listened with a smile on his own, she then continued ‘When Im gone, I dont want you to be sad,’ she whispered, ‘Dont say that.’ He shook his head, arms wrapping atound her and hugging her close ‘Youll be fine, you told me youll be fine..’ ‘I know..I just want you to know that, I love you and I want you to be happy and smile, dont dwell on the past, I forgive you, you know that right?’

He nodded, picking her up and taking her to their room, undressing her and putting her pyjamas on then the same with himself while she climbed under the cover and continued, ‘I mean it okay? So dont think it was your fault’ ‘But it was’ he muttered, sadly. ‘It wasnt.’ He didnt argue, he just stayed quiet, contemplating and dwelling on how he knew it was. ‘Are you hungry? Ill go make you some f/f..’ he left the room, not waiting for an answer, leaving you to look down disappointedly.

He didnt want to listen because he knew what you were going to say. Weakly closing your eyes, your hands wrapping around your torso, you opened your eyes a few minutes later, you felt awful, you felt your time closing in you, you swallowed some saliva or at least tried to, you heard Bakugou walk back in and the smell of f/f invaded your senses, you looked up and he walked over with two trays, both holding f/f and f/d, you smiled a small smile that weakly faltered when he put the trays down on the bed and grabbed the remote to the tv in your shared room.

—

That night when he held you in his arms and ran his finger through your hair and you slowly faded away, youre heart beat faltering, to which only the bear you held—between you two chest to chest—could hear.

‘Suki?’

‘Hm?’

‘I love you so much you know that right?’

‘I know..I love you too y/n’

You smiled, hearing him as he spoke genuinely, he really did love you, he just didnt remember or realise that he did so much until he woke up the next morning, your time had come and gone, your heart—

—‘Y/n? Baby wake up, its time to get up’ he shook you softly, you still clung to both him and the bear between you both—faltered that night, it had finally given up and you had lost your last game—

—‘Y/n wake up!’ He checked your breathing, your pulse, anything he could think of to try and give himself some hope that you weren—

You didnt want to die unhappy but you didnt want to stress him or frustrate him when or if he found your body had you stayed and he didnt read the letter.

—t dead, to try and give himself some hope that you werent dead, but the large lack or little to none of heartbeat and the fact that you werent breathing only made the tears fall from his eyes faster—

Its not the time to dwell on the past anymore, you just had to focus on not being scared of what was to come next, so instead you took in as much of Bakugou as you could, you latched closer onto him and took in his warmth and tried to focus on the bear, the calm bear that basically had no idea what was happening around it.

—‘Please wake up, Please wake up’ he repeated while dialling Emergency Services—

At least Suki would have it to take care of him while you were gone. You closed your eyes, and let out one last breath, feeling his grip tighten on you, a tear ran down your cheek as death took you with a gentle touch.

—

—‘I love you’ Bakugou whispered to your grave, tears running down his face as he hugged the bear the won you at the festival the night you died in his arms..when the found his body and a note saying,

‘Bury me with the bear next to her -Katsuki Bakugou’

It turned out he really did love you?

Useful Things To Know When Writing Pianist Characters/Characters that play the piano

From someone who’s been playing the piano for more than 10 years. 

Things that happen during practice that you might not have known

Weird sheet music cuts are among the worst things to ever exist, and it occurs more often than you’d think. Page changes occur during the middle of a phrase or a section a lot of the time and this is the most annoying thing ever if you don’t have the entire piece memorized when practicing because it completely disrupts your flow, it cuts off the emotion and the transition from phrase to phrase won’t be smooth because you’re constantly interrupted at the same spot.

Playing the piano can be a very sweaty experience (not very attractive yeah), especially when you’re practicing, because you’re putting in a lot of concentration and there’s a lot of physical exertion for a long period of time (playing sonatas and concertos require stamina I am not kidding). But you can’t turn up the fan speed because that will in turn, create the problem of sheet music flying off the music rack in the middle of your practice! I live in a tropical country where it’s hot as hell all the time and let me tell you that sweating buckets when practicing is the norm.

Clicking fingernails. Pianists never have long nails, because the sound of nails clicking on the piano keys absolutely ruins the music. If a pianist hears their nails going clickity-clack when playing, it’s a bright neon sign to go cut their nails.

Getting distracted. Duh. I often go to YouTube in the middle of practice because I’m not sure how a section is supposed to sound like, so I have to listen to and learn from professionals who know what they’re doing (unlike me). However, sometimes I get whisked away by the video recommendations and 30 minutes later I’m watching child prodigies playing Paganini Caprices instead of practicing. D:

Technical flaws to piano playing (can be used to criticize others or when your character is practicing)

Uneven chords. When two or more notes have to be played together by one hand, it’s best to press all the notes at the same time so a clear, sharp sound is produced. Some compositions have consecutive and fast chords, which can lead to uneven chords with insufficient practice or if the pianist is less skillful.

Inaccurate jumps. Jumps are a pain in the arse. Imagine that you’re playing the piano and really feeling it, and suddenly you slam on the completely wrong notes. Most of the time, it’s not a mistake that’s easy to cover up, more so if they’re chords.

Faked running notes. Not exactly “faked” per se, but it’s very easy to slip and miss a handful of notes during runs and it’s something that could pull someone out of your performance, especially someone with a trained ear or who’s familiar with the piece. Normally it’s not a big mistake, but it does spoil the quality of the music.

Speeding up. I think this is something that all musicians tend to do when they’re either excited or nervous, due to the adrenaline. Personally I feel like this sometimes does allow the musician to feel the music and enter the “zone” more easily but sometimes it causes them to slip in the already-fast passages as well, since they’re going faster than they are used to. 

Unclear dynamics and phrasing. Dynamics and phrasing are gigantic parts of classical music in general and they can define an entire performance. A performance with unclear dynamics and phrasing is like a movie with a bland and ill-thought-out plot. You’d want listeners to be able to distinguish and feel the ups and downs of the music, not feel bored out by it.

Too much pedaling. If you’re familiar with piano you should know that pianos have a sustaining pedal that is used to sustain notes that would otherwise be out of reach and produce a richer, fuller sound. However, the pedal should be changed (lifted and pressed again) every few beats, or else the piece will sound noisy. This can become a problem because sometimes, pianists themselves don’t notice that the sound gets blurry, as the vibrations spread out away from them, and listeners will have to point it out to them.

Other things to note:

Statistics prove that females generally have shorter fingers than males, which can be a disadvantage to playing piano, mainly because of the inability to reach wide chords in compositions, though this can be solved by playing them in arpeggios (spreading the notes out to play instead of playing them all at once). Another thing is that having longer fingers can minimize wrist movements which makes playing easier.

Every single piano has a different touch when playing, due to the difference between the weight of the keys. In addition, keyboards, clavinovas, upright pianos, baby grand pianos and grand pianos all have different technologies in producing the sound. Keyboards aren’t favorable most of the time as they are relatively shorter (have less keys) and the keys are very shallow in comparison with an actual piano, which limits the music dynamics (loudness and softness) that can be produced. The good thing about keyboards and clavinovas though is that nowadays, most of them have audio jacks, so pianists can play with earphones/headphones plugged in, which makes it much more convenient for practicing as the sound won’t impact other people living in the same building/vicinity.

Regarding practice time: in all honesty this probably differs from pianist to pianist. Nevertheless, professional pianists generally practice 4-5 hours a day. For people that play the piano as a hobby or on the side, practice duration is usually much shorter. As an example, I used to try and squeeze in 2 hour practices on Saturdays and Sundays for my Grade 8 exam as my weekdays were packed full with school and co-curricular activities, this however, was the best-case scenario. If I had other activities on weekends, piano would be deprioritized and practice duration would be made up for during the next week. It was the same for all my classmates who played the piano outside of school as well, but keep in mind that this kind of practice schedule isn’t ideal and it’s best to practice every day even if it’s just 15 minutes per day. When I started preparing for my diploma exam, I tried my best to practice at least an hour a day because I was scared of failing it hahaha. Once again, practice duration and schedule is highly specific for every individual based on where piano is placed on their priority list.

I hope this was helpful! I’m also planning to do more posts like this so feel free to ask me if you have any questions :D 

Boots Reads Homestuck Epilogue(s) Part 10 - Candy Part 1 again

I was told that finishing the epilogue MAY make me feel better by some with opinions, with some vague hints that the ridiculous start of Candy may have underlying reasons, so now that I’m awake again (though my stomach is roiling a bit again) I’m gonna take another crack at it.

Alright, so I was also hinted that this Candy part ends with a different cliffhanger, so maybe those two will cancel out?  That’s my hope anyway.

Reading page 1 again since I didn’t finish the very tail end of it... alright, so WHY IS ROXY CRYING again????  Was she just PRETENDING that she didn’t know it might turn out bad for John if he went at the end of the last one?  Was there some weird mind-rewriting going on?  Is the crying a symptom of this whole thing potentially being an our!Callie fanfic and she knows what’s being dodged??  Don’t know.

Alright, let’s have him save Gamzee and... is Vriska going to get saved in this version?  Or is that descent into the black hole without seeing what happens her well-deserved comeuppance while only the ghost version of Vriska truly figured out how to be happy?

==>

Dirk acknowledges him when he zaps back, but it’s YOUNG Dirk so hopefully there isn’t any stupid Meat stuff going on.

...Yeah, Gamzee immediately being repentant is weird as shit.  Maybe he Chucklevoodoo’d Callie into escaping him into this whole candied mess so he could start shit, I dunno.  That or this isn’t really Gamzee or someone’s manipulating him or etc etc etc.  The hint I got earlier was that if I thought Calliope wanting to bring Gamzee back and everyone just rolling with it was a little out of character, there are “reasons”, so I’m just going through all of this under the assumption that some emotion-manipulating weirdness is going on regardless.

Oh shit, Gamzee’s going to start recounting his character reasons for doing bad stuff in a surface-hope of justification and understanding.  All the characters immediately recognize how painfully groanworthy this is going to be.

GAMZEE: AnD sUcH iS wHy I’m GrAbBiNg HoLd Of My RePeNtAnCe As FiRm AnD sErIoUs As I wOuLd A wHoRe’S tItTy!

Yeah, that really encapsulates how “serious” all of this is.  And of course, John’s not having any of it.

Yeah, Terezi wouldn’t have any of it either, remotely.

Something feels different, but he can’t put his finger on it.

Hm.  The aforementioned manipulation-weirdness?

==>

Okay, so it’s kind of Dirk who notices something different and is cancelling his stupid villain plans, got it.

Volatility of causality, huh?

(I’m going to be going through these parts a little faster than the Meat section, unsurprisingly.)

==>

Okay, Rose and Kanaya, are we gonna cure her substance abuse or--

With all the distance between them lately,

God damnit, have Dirk’s manipulations extended that far OFFSCREEN or is this legitimate character distancing???? Because either is BAD.  >:(

Right, now that the plot and “relevance” has been sidelined over to a different timeline, Rose can now breathe easy free of her condition.  And whichever parts of her condition were, perhaps, IMPOSED on her.  Fuck.

I’m going to try my fucking best to cling to this, hope I can carry on a memory after this is over that DOESN’T imagine Rose trapped in a fucking existential dying villain coma with a hard fucking cutoff that promises nothing is ever coming to resolve it ever.  (Or Jade in a somewhat-similar sidelined situation, or Jane doomed to fuck herself over and everyone else too, or...)

What’s slipping away instead is the feeling that any of it mattered at all. Was she insane to be so consumed by such lofty concerns, and is she only beginning to experience clarity today, for the first time in ages?

Yeah, you’re no longer in a timeline of Light and relevance.  And that’s not so bad, which is something you never expected to be true given your derision of the concept.  Void is pretty goddamn alright.

--Oh right, the illness and substance abuse probably caused plenty of distance between them.

KANAYA: There Was A Feeling I Couldnt Shake That Something Terrible Was Going To Happen To Us KANAYA: Something That Neither Of Us Could Stop KANAYA: A Powerful Outside Force That Would Take You Away From Me KANAYA: And I Couldnt Stop Myself From Thinking That Maybe KANAYA: Maybe That It Would Be For The Best ROSE: Kanaya... KANAYA: I Can Now See That This Is Completely Ridiculous

For some reason, this doesn’t settle my stomach much?  It’s clear Andrew wove this in here so that if you read Meat first, you’d be able to acknowledge readily how this diverged in a way the characters kind of recognize, and... I’m not sure what I’m even saying.  It’s like there’s hope that this is TRYING to take the bad taste out of my mouth, but I don’t believe it overly much.

ROSE: What a relief, considering that we are both going to be young and magically fit literally forever.

Wait, so they DID find a way to extend their non-ascended friends’ lifespans to practical immortality?  Jane’s Life powers?  Something else?

==>

yay jade.  more extended dave metaphors.  calm down stomach.

JADE: i never thought id be thinking of you as my weird nerd friend by the time we were in our twenties

Heheheh.

DAVE: yeah well i never thought youd be like the premiere woo girl on the planet

Had to look up what a “woo girl” was.

Yes Jade go flirt them to death

What she’s planning isn’t a seduction. It’s a public service.

Pff

(And yeah, she’s being pushy but at least she doesn’t go DIRK FAR about it.)

DAVE: its incredible hes driven at least ten people off the site by creating thinly veiled parody accounts of their usernames

Oh my gosh, Karkat’s good enough to ANDREW HUSSIE them?!???  :D

That’s incredible.

Karkat knows damned well what a husband is. He’s been force-fed enough bad movies from Dave to pick up any human euphemism you could name. He still plays dumb sometimes, for comedic effect, to irritate his friends, or simply to avoid a topic of conversation altogether.

Yeah, it was always pretty clear that about HALF of the trolls pretended not to understand something human that they knew about just for comedic effect and they knew it.  :)

It would be pretty easy to mistake his reaction for arousal, so it’s understandable that Jade is extremely surprised when Karkat snaps his jaw shut and chomps down on her hand.

PFFFFHahahahah :D

And yep, Jane cancelled her run at Dirk’s direction.

DAVE: lets all just thank whichever christ was responsible for making whatever decision resulted in her deciding not to do that

*nod nod*

JADE: well i hope she gets a better hobby JADE: there are a lot of less ominous things she could do with her time KARKAT: WHAT, LIKE FUCKING HER WAY THROUGH HALF THE POPULATION OF EARTH C?

Jade pinches his ear and twists hard, smiling pleasantly.

JADE: get fucked karkat

Yeah, this is about the level of violence/threat I’d expect from Jade when anyone slut-shames her for perfectly acceptable behavior.

==>

There is almost no crime on Earth C, and so almost no one locks their door.

Huh.  I guess post-scarcity might do that.

Alright, we get to see Jane being less of a fuckass.

Dirk was the one person on Earth C who took the state of the locksmith industry with the seriousness it deserved.

Pffff

JAKE: Thats my theory at least. Maybe its tommyrot but i have faith that dirk will be back. After all where is he going to go?

Good question that wasn’t answered in Meat, so of course Jake says it here obliviously.

JAKE: I must admit i am rather half rats at the moment. JANE: You’re what? JAKE: Haha sorry that was a pretty obtuse way of putting it wasnt it. JAKE: What i mean to say is that ive been powdering my hair quite a bit today.

Andrew is SO good at making Jake sound completely incomprehensible.

...Ouch, Jane, don’t drink so hard! D:

The “morbs”??

JAKE: Dirk has that manner about him does he not? JAKE: A way about him that makes you feel like whatever you do as long as it does not involve him it doesnt count for dick.

Yeah, fuck Dirk.

Hm... is the absence of relevance affecting them, or some other manipulation? It’s not just the LACK of Dirk’s manipulation.

JAKE: Except of course for that time when you were under mind control and had me trussed up in your lair as you pontificated villainously about using me as a breeding stud to create a blood lineage for your incumbent corporate space empire.

A fate Dirk seems to agree with, judging by Meat.  Let’s sidestep that fucking entirely, thank you.

...yeah, I didn’t expect Jake’s response to be any less oblivious than exactly that.

==>

So why DID Callie bring Gamzee back, anyway?  Is there some secret use for him in mind?  Was she manipulated into it?  Maybe BY Gamzee?  Hm.

...alright, priestly with followings.  That ain’t good.  Is he aiming for Clown President MK2?

Everything Callie and Roxy have done and said in this Candy section so far seems creepily contrived, possibly by design.

...okay did they have some kind of weird agreement? Like, “okay John is gonna make his choice, and if he chooses to stay i try dating him instead of you, Callie”???  That’s... no that can’t be it.  Roxy’s NEVER acted THIS oblivious before.  What’s she playing at?

GAMZEE: mY fUcKiN *gUy*. :o) JOHN: ... GAMZEE: My DuDe AnD mY nInJa AlIkE. GAMZEE: mY *hOrN* dOoOoG. JOHN: ... GAMZEE: mY hOrN tO tHa MoThErFuCkIn DoG. ;o) JOHN: waiter! help!

I’m imagining Gamzee now as a sweaty and homeless, unkempt Guy Fieri.

Yeah, this doesn’t look like it’ll be fun.

==>

...Swifer Eggmop.  ¬_¬”

There’s a third member of their social group who definitely hasn’t arrived at the conclusion that his power and influence should be meted out responsibly either. Neither of them speak his name, however. For some reason, it feels like a shadow passing over the sun. A brief spike of pain flickers through Rose’s head, a bolt that strikes between her eyes and splinters out. There is color and light behind it. A vision that tears through the material reality in front of her and gives her a brief glimpse into a parallel reality where things are very different.

Yeah, fuck Dirk.

...Pff. Yeah, Rose WOULD mimic the record-scratch gesture.

Don’t invoke “never seeing Vriska again” like that, you’re really tempting fate.

Heh, Rose is finding some Light in the darkness, wanting to do something that’s meaningful on an expressive level with this Vriskgrub business.

Hm... why is my stomach a little less uneasy?

I sure hope it stays that way.

==>

KARKAT: OH MY GOD, ARE THE MECHANICAL GLUTES ON THAT BILLBOARD ACTUALLY PADDED WITH PLUSH TO MAKE THEM MORE LIFELIKE?

Heck Yes

...Yes, touch the butt, Karkat.

Jade, pouting a bit, glides in between them and uses her Space powers to teleport Dave’s phone out from the center of his traumatized palm and into the pocket of her sweater.

Hm!  So she still has teleportation abilities over a limited range even without her Green Sun boost, that’s nice.  :D

After all, where would these two pitiful beta boys be without her?

Oh my fucking god stop being Dirk, Jade.  And never use that narrative language again, even in your head.  Heck, even if Dirk’s the one WRITING this still, don’t even think CLOSE enough to think those words.

...yeah this sounds like an Active player class taking things slightly too far.

Thank you, Karkat, for drawing the consent-line in the sand.  Looks like Jade’s backing off a little.

--hold on, wait, Dave kissed him? He did, so why is-- let me read back up--

Dave doesn’t answer. She answers for him by leaning down and planting a dry, affectionate kiss on Karkat’s cheek.

Okay I misread this line earlier.  Jade kissed Karkat when neither of them were looking and is BLAMING Dave.  Hmm.

Alright, Dave ollies outie.  Karkat tumbles down some hillstairs.

Jade could probably catch him. Actually, she could easily do it, but it doesn’t seem like the kind of favor you should do in a fledgling kismesissitude.

Thaaaat’s a little presumptuous??

JADE: well i guess im eating grub spaghetti alone JADE: *again*!!!

:C

I’d be sadder if you didn’t bring it down hard upon yourself but

:C

==>

Yeah, John, better clear up this Callie business because it’s muddy as heck why Roxy would just drop everything to try things out with you.

Ah, we’re bringing up the gender identity thing on this side too, hm?

More serious talk, this is good, reading reading...

The glasses clink together clumsily, and water gets all over the complimentary breadsticks.

Oh no.  This had better not be Olive Garden.

ROXY: no one else has ever made me feel like this

--not Calliope???

What the heck is even going on.

Dave’s coming for some bro help it looks like.

==>

It’s hilarious how much Dave is freaking out about this, and how completely in-character it is.

JOHN: holy fucking shit. JOHN: there’s a gay snooze button? DAVE: yeah man theres a gay snooze button JOHN: wow.

I love these two’s conversations

......wait, Dave’s been holding off on kissing Karkat because of what he thinks JADE might think???? D:

JOHN: i almost managed to forget that she was trying to fuck you and karkat.

Pfffffffff  :D

Yep.  I love it being put so bluntly.

Reading on... yeah, for some reason I also always figured that the end result of a nice three-way relationship between those three people would be Jade and Dave essentially both just glomming onto Karkat more than each other?  Hm.

JOHN: i mean... it doesn’t sound... JOHN: *canon*?

...I hope you’re just talking about his coin flip explanation and not DaveKatJade.  >:(

John wonders when talking to Dirk has fixed anything for anyone.

Nod nod.

She grins up at John with shimmering, adoring eyes. They’re reflecting every star in the sky, all for him.

Seriously, what the hell.  Is Roxy hypnotized?  Putting on an act?  A voidy act??

I’m not doubting that Roxy COULD feel that way about John, I’m doubting the suddenness and the way Calliope is being deliberately ignored in the situation, which is so goddamn obvious that JOHN is uncomfortable about it.  There’s something seriously strange going on.

It itches at the back of his head, the idea that he might have just fucked up Dave’s entire life.

D:

Alright next post after a bit of breakfast.

On Overland Travel, Part 1: Can We Prove Vaarsuvius Wrong?

Rich Burlew's Order of the Stick #145 rather accurately expresses the nature of the problem with Random Encounters when travelling overland. Go read the strip before continuing; it only takes a second and it's worth it. You don't have to know anything else about the series to understand the point made in this particular page.

In the strip, Vaarsuvius convincingly demonstrates (far better than I ever could) exactly why Random Encounters are a waste of time—but do they have to be that way? If they were such a waste of time, why are they then such a staple of the genre? Perhaps, like Wandering Monsters and traps, the mechanic can be salvaged once we dive in and understand why it's there in the first place.

My approach to Wandering Monsters in dungeons—which you can read here—won't work for Random Encounters travelling overland because of the nature of resting and healing in D&D. Wandering Monsters represent battles of attrition that wear down spellcasters faster than fighters, and also provide a simple way to simulate an entire ecosystem without using a single iota of the GM's brainpower. However, if the party has the opportunity to rest between every single Random Encounter, they quickly become a waste of time for the reasons mentioned above—the party will blow all of their powerful, limited-use abilities, then simply heal to full before the next battle. Victory is both free and assured, so the GM might as well save everyone some time and roll on a random-XP table every day of travel.

But before we decide to 'fix' Random Encounters, we have to know why they exist in the first place.

Note: For the purposes of article, "Random Encounters" refers to monsters, NPCs, and other stuff stumbled into in an overland journey measured in days, while "Wandering Monsters" refers to monsters, NPCs, and other stuff stumbled into in a dungeon crawl, typically measured in minutes or hours. I believe this is the terminology used in D&D itself, though the phrases have always been used interchangeably in my gaming group, and maybe in yours too.

Why Bother?

I believe that every game mechanic was created for a reason. Not all of them were necessarily well thought out, or solve the problem they were intended to elegantly. For some, like Wandering Monsters, the reason is long forgotten, but the mechanic lingers, leaving people scratching their heads and simply houseruling it out.

Random Encounters are one of a slew of mechanics, such as Wandering Monsters, Treasure Tables, and Rumour Tables, that involve the GM secretly rolling on a secret table to determine a result that they could just make up by themselves and no-one would know—a practice which, I believe, has become increasingly popular. GMs will build bespoke treasure hoards and encountered tailored to the party, rather than relying on a random generator. There's nothing wrong with doing this, and if it works for you, go for it, but there's a reason all those tables and random generators exist in the first place.

The first, and most obvious, is that procedurally generating content makes the GM's job easier. It's much easier to roll some dice and be given an answer than to come up with one yourself. This makes GMing, which is already an intimidating role, much more accessible.

The second, and most controversial, is that procedurally generating content makes the GM into a player. Neither the GM nor the players know what will happen when the dice hit the table, so both are holding their breaths in suspense. The GM, now, is on the side of the players—worrying that a powerful monster will be generated, hoping for good treasure, and so on. This can reduce the sometimes adversarial nature of the relationship between GM and player, because both players and GM know that the GM isn't punishing the players by having them stumble into a dragon's cave—the game did that to them.

The third, and most subtle, is that it means the PCs aren't the centre of the universe. When every encounter isn't custom-tailored to the party's exact level and makeup, the entire nature of the universe changes. This gamey-seeming mechanic can actually enhance verisimilitude by realistically populating the world with "too hard" and "too easy" encounters. Much like with Wandering Monsters, a cleverly built Random Encounter table can simulate a thriving ecosystem without diverting any of the GM's precious attention.

There are a few other benefits to Random Encounter specifically, as well. They can make long journeys actually feel longer than short ones, and give an incentive to find faster methods of travel. I've seen many players scoff at buying horses or hiring ships to travel, because it doesn't actually matter how long it takes to get from point A to point B in-game. Regular Random Encounter checks makes travelling on horseback a substantially safer proposition. Additionally, character classes that are experts at wilderness survival, such as rangers and druids, might be given more opportunities to shine. Rangers in particular need every advantage they can get.

So What Do We Do About It?

The problem lies not within Random Encounters themselves, nor in resting per se, but in the interaction between them. This leaves us three options: give up, change the encounters, or change resting.

Give Up

If we just get rid of overland encounters altogether, the problem is solved. This is a perfectly acceptable solution—it's the one espoused by Vaarsuvius earlier—and it's basically what I've been doing for years as GM, just like I gave up on traps and Wandering Monsters.

Of course, it comes with a heavy set of downsides. Wandering Monsters, as I mentioned in my On Wandering Monsters series, have a slew of mechanical and narrative benefits. Abandoning traps means unfairly shafting the Rogue and de-clawing the dungeon. Abandoning Random Encounters can make overland travel, a staple of the genre, bland and uninteresting—and can shaft the Ranger and Druid, both of whom are supposed to be "good at" travel in the way that Rogues are "good at" dungeons. A good Random Encounter system, similarly, should be able to spice up overland travel, if we can just get it right this time.

Change the Encounters

Given that they are only encountered every few days, the party will be going into each battle fully-charged and rearing to go. This means that the only way to give the battle any stakes is to massively ratchet up the difficulty of the monster, such that it accounts for the party's entire daily complement of abilities. We could also greatly increase the rate of wandering monsters such that there are six or seven every day, rather than one or two, but the thought of how many real-world hours would be spent fighting monsters to simulate even a week's travel makes me ill. Either of these approaches make every Random Encounters into a life-or-death battle to the bitter end, which isn't what I'm looking for as a general solution, though it might work in some cases.

Change Resting

Generally speaking, taking long rests in dungeons should be discouraged, if not prevented outright. A single 'delve' into a dungeon is a resource-management game of judiciously expending spells and hit points in order to overcome obstacles. Overland journeys have no such restrictions, allowing healing between every encounter, thus eliminating much of the "resource management" aspect of the game.

The short rest/long rest dynamic in 5th edition D&D is a good one, and one baked into every level of the rules, so changes made to it should be with a light touch. When tweaking things for overland travel, we don't want to 'break' other aspects of the game, like dungeon crawls or murder mysteries.

If we think of the journey between town and the dungeon as one "day," from a resting standpoint, then we can replicate the "whittling down of spells and hit points" effect that makes dungeon crawls work. We can keep Random Encounters short and sweet, because there is no longer any pressure on each individual one to challenge the party, but rather, to whittle away some of their precious resources. There's a lot of specifics to work out, but I think this is the approach that will work best for a typical D&D campaign.

Next up: On Overland Travel, Part II: Long Rests and Short Rests.

Fandom features: Author Wendy Qualls

To kick off a series of fandom-focused posts, we’re chatting with author Wendy Qualls (aka wendymarlowe on AO3) about fanfic, Johnlock, getting published, the intersection of fanfiction and original fiction, and a little dash of DragonCon! We so enjoyed learning a bit about Wendy’s fandom experience, and are so glad to share her insight with all of you! Don’t miss the amazing rec list she wrote for us after the jump (it’s so good). Thank you so much for talking with us, Wendy! 

Thanks so much for chatting with us! How can our readers find you?

I write fic as wendymarlowe (Marlowe being my middle name), but I write my original male/male romance under my real name, Wendy Qualls. (www.wendyqualls.com)

So what inspired you to start writing fic?

I write in the Sherlock fandom with brief forays into Harry Potter, but my first ever fandom was Dragon Age. I played Dragon Age: Origins and went through the love story with one of the characters and immediately thought "I want to experience exactly that again, but different" and I remembered something called fanfic my sister used to read so I looked some up. The one I found was awful, but then I found my way onto fanfiction.net and eventually onto AO3. The fics got better :-)

Now that you’re writing mostly in the Sherlock fandom, what about Johnlock is the most appealing to you?

Honestly? I love what fandom has done to the characters. The Sherlock and John on the show would both be horrible people to be in a relationship with, but the general fandom version sort of rounds the edges off a bit. Sherlock is abrasive but not cruel, John is competently BAMF without being violent and angry. The show has throwaway lines like how John “lost an entire Wednesday once” and I know Moftiss put it in there because they thought it was funny but SERIOUSLY? Drugging your flatmate is not okay! I’d much rather read (and write) about characters who are capable of healthy relationships :-)

What is your favorite thing you have written so far?

My most popular fic, and the one that was the most amazing to write, was Dear John (https://archiveofourown.org/works/2647979). Summary: "With Sherlock dead, John eventually (under duress) makes a profile on an online dating site. And falls into a long-distance relationship with an enigmatic partner who reminds him of Sherlock in all the right ways. (Hint: it turns out to be Sherlock.)" 

It was inspired by a friend trying a dating website and me realizing that sense of waiting for replies and not knowing when they're coming could be replicated by AO3's subscribe feature - I posted the fic in "real time." (As in, back and forth according to when the characters would have been writing each other). It had a pretty modest following at the beginning, but by the time John and Sherlock shared their first sexting right before Christmas it kind of blew up on Tumblr and the comments section started to be longer than the chapters :-P 

It was amazing to see a mini-fandom develop right there and see everyone debating what they thought John and Sherlock were up to that very minute. By the time the fic got to the big dramatic face-to-face meet, the comments/replies were coming in faster than I could read them! I'm told it's still fun to read now, all at once, but the shared waiting experience was something I wish I could replicate for another fic and I don't know that I ever could.

When I started submitting around to find a literary agent, the popularity of Dear John and my other AO3 fics was a strong point in my favor with the agent I ultimately signed with :-) There's a LOT of overlap between romance authors and fanfic authors, actually, even if not all of them are public about it.

Speaking of your work as a published author, do you have any words of wisdom for the fic authors out there who are hoping to get published one day?

Everyone—every published author ever—has a few manuscripts “under the bed” that just didn’t work. Often it’s because their writing needed to get stronger before publishing, sometimes it’s because they hit a crowded market exactly wrong or just never connected with the right editors/agents. Only around 10% of people who attempt to write their first novel make it to the end, and less than half of those get to the point they’re submitting it for professional consideration. 

The thing is, though, the only way to get better at writing is to write. I don’t care how many books and blogs you read about the craft (although those help too), you’re not going to get your book out there for money if you’re not willing to write something imperfect first.

Fanfic, I believe, is an amazing way to practice writing for low stakes. You get your pick of pre-developed characters and settings to choose from, there are no deadlines, and 99% of fanfic readers are supportive. AO3 says I’ve had 11,549 comments on my works - I think I’ve had only one or two readers who were critical. The rest are positive and make me excited to write for them. There is no doubt in my mind that fanfic has made me a better writer. Anyone who dreams of being published someday, my advice is this: write a book. Then write another. Write fanfic along the way and pick up people to cheer you on. The difference between published and unpublished is mostly luck, persistence, and confidence.

Do you ever get writer’s block? What do you do to combat it?

I do absolutely get writer's block, in big part because of my depression. (Depression sucks, btw.) Writing fic has made me comfortable having multiple works in progress at once, though, so often if I'm stuck on my "real" book I can write fic instead. I can't turn out fic as fast as I could before I started actually being published and having deadlines, but it's still a totally different feel writing for no stakes versus "how are my agent and editor and readers going to judge this?" Positive comments on AO3 pretty much balance out the negative energy in bad book reviews :-P

While we discussed this interview, you mentioned you’ll be in attendance at DragonCon this weekend. What are you most excited to do at con?

The panels and the people! There are several friends I only see at DragonCon, and it’s always fun to reconnect. The panels, though, are the heart of the convention. Science vs. Movies (10 PM Sunday in the Hilton Crystal ballroom) is always a highlight - it’s a panel of real, actual science experts forced to watch terrible Hollywood scenes and then argue why the scene was actually 100% scientifically plausible :-P Sometimes they break down and cry. It’s awesome.

You’re on some panels, right? When can folks catch those?

Friday at 10 PM: "BritTrack After Dark - British Fanfic/Slashfic Panel!" in Hilton Galleria 5 and Saturday at 10 PM: "We Do the Weird Stuff!: NC17 Fanfic" in Marriott M301

And finally, do you have any fic recs to share with our followers?

(Ed. Note: Y’ALL! Wendy wrote us an amazing rec list which is under the cut - Click for some Sherlock-y goodness!)

Favorite crack-premise-but-serious-fic: The Midas Touch (E) by flawedregina (https://archiveofourown.org/works/2479868) John Watson has a medical condition that means everyone he sleeps with is instantly healed of all illness and injury. This causes complications when Sherlock breaks his arm, and even more complications when Sherlock falls in love with him. Yes, this is a story where John has a literal magic healing cock. It's a lot less cracky than you're probably imagining. I love this for the "literal magical healing cock" premise, but it's also a beautiful look at ethics, personality, and the dynamics of sex. John is caught between feeling like he ethically HAS to use his rare gift because it saves people's lives and feeling the very human need for privacy and having control over his own life. Sherlock is a brat because he's always a brat but he GETS it and supports John and seriously, it's wonderful. 32K.

Favorite crack-premise-but-serious-fic without all the smut: A Magnificent Instrument (T) by mycapeisplaid (https://archiveofourown.org/works/7452193) A series of vignettes set in an AU in which Sherlock plays the tuba instead of the violin. This does have some brilliant takes on the idea (my favorite is Sherlock playing "oompah oompah" elephant steps in time with Mycroft leaving the flat) but it's also got an amazing connection between Sherlock and John. 6K.

Favorite fantasy AU: Here There Be Dragons (E) by Leloi (https://archiveofourown.org/works/786378) When Lord John of the Umberland Watsons volunteered to his lord father to deal with a dragon, this was not what he had in mind. Instead of using his sword and shield to deal a deadly blow he found himself trussed up like a festival goose sans armor and small clothes, naked as his birth day. This is sweet and hot at the same time and thanks to a certain Tolkien movie, we don't have to imagine very hard to envision Sherlock as a dragon :-D 8K.

Favorite short, kinky smut: Performance Art (E) by thisprettywren (https://archiveofourown.org/works/208374) “I have to say, John, I really just. Well. I can’t see the appeal.” That wasn’t precisely true, of course. At the moment, the appeal lay in the way John was blushing and licking his lip, avoiding Sherlock’s gaze, thoroughly discomfited. This one is so sexy and so Sherlock in how he thinks and gah, just read it! 6K. Favorite AU: The Bang and the Clatter (M) by earlgreytea68 (https://archiveofourown.org/works/744242) Sherlock Holmes is a pitcher and John Watson is a catcher. No, no, no, it's a baseball AU.   I learned a ton about baseball from this fic - it's very educational :-P It's also clear that earlgreytea is an AMAZING writer and a true baseball fan. 137K.

Favorite D/s verse: Shames and Praises (E) by s0mmerspr0ssen (https://archiveofourown.org/works/573019) Unable but desperate to find a dom who will put up with him, Sherlock swallows his pride and turns to Mycroft for help. Shortly after, John Watson steps into Sherlock's life.   Kinky as hell with a wonderful caring top!John. D/s done right. 52K.

Favorite Mystrade: The DI and the Spy (T) by chasingriver (https://archiveofourown.org/works/558609) Greg is an early-morning runner. Mycroft is an early riser who happens to live on Greg's running route. Hilarity ensues. Written for MystradeDoodles' prompt: "Greg is a runner. Rom-com." Exactly what it says on the package - a sweet rom-com story about how Mycroft and Lestrade get a crush on each other before even knowing who the other is. 44K.

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Yoongi - Another You

Summary: A year after you broke up with Yoongi, he sends you a letter. 

Getting home after a long day at work, you looked down at the mail near the door as you slipped your shoes off. It looked like the typical selection of bank statements, bills and adverts you normally received. When you picked it up, however, tucked behind one of the big A4 envelopes was a small, handwritten letter.

The address on the outside was written in blue pen, clearly written quite quickly, scrawling slightly across the page and you were sure someone more expert than you would be able to tell from looking at it that the person who wrote it was not a native English speaker, effort being put into forming each letter as it was not his first language. You didn’t need to be an expert to know that, however, because you recognised the handwriting. That was why you were staring at the writing on the envelope rather than opening the letter.

The letter sat on the kitchen side in your little flat for four days, never really letting you forget about it, before you decided enough was enough. You either needed to read it, or you needed to get rid of it.

That decision alone took an hour of staring at the innocuous looking envelope.

As soon as you had seen the handwriting, recognising it as Namjoon’s, you had been dreading the contents of the letter. You had fallen out of contact with all of the guys when you broke up with Yoongi. It had been too hard talking to them when you had to avoid him, but it would have been even harder to keep talking to him, so you just cut them all out of your life.

You missed them, of course you did. None of them had done anything wrong. You just had to leave.

Yoongi had even suggested that you try a long-distance relationship when you told him you had to go, but you knew it wouldn’t work. Even when you were living in Korea, only twenty minutes away from the dorm, it had been hard work to keep your relationship going. Being an idol, Yoongi was a busy man. You had never had a problem with it, knowing that you had known what you were signing up for when you started your relationship with an idol. The problem only came when you had to go home.

You had been offered your dream job back in your home country and you couldn’t say no. This was everything you had been working for longer than you could even remember. You had to go.

It was your fault you and Yoongi broke up and you knew it. You were aware that was almost certainly part of the reason you were so scared to open the letter. You felt guilty for causing whatever pain Yoongi went through after you left, inevitably hurting the other guys as well.

As much as you had been wanting to talk to the guys again over the past year, you stayed away. Every time you were tempted to pick up the phone, you remembered Yoongi’s face when you told him you were leaving and you needed to break up. Not a memory you were keen on reliving. Even though this letter brought back similar thoughts, you realised you couldn’t keep trying to ignore it forever.

Even so, actually reading it was another thing altogether.

The first step was opening the envelope. You held your breath the entire time.

Then the letter was out and in your hand. You even managed to unfold it, but your eyes just would not focus.

The handwriting was the problem.

And it wasn’t that you were out of practice reading Hangul. After your time in Korea, you didn’t think that would ever be an issue.

Nor was it that the handwriting was particularly bad. It wasn’t the best, but it was legible.

It was who the handwriting belonged to. Handwriting that you recognised even faster than Namjoon’s on the envelope.

It was Yoongi’s.

When you finally managed to start reading it, you didn’t stop until you got to the end.

Dear Y/N-(y)ah Y/N-ssi Y/N-(y)ah,

I know that I shouldn’t be contacting you. You probably don’t want me to.

I know you told me not to because it would make it harder for you, but I need to say this.

I don’t know yet if I’m ever going to send this letter, I just need the thoughts out of my head.

I love you.

I still love you.

I don’t think I’ll ever stop.

I’m sure you don’t think of me anywhere near as often as I think of you, but I hope you do sometimes, and you do it with fondness.

I understand why you ended us, why you had to, but that didn’t stop it from hurting, having to say goodbye.

I spent a long time after you left moping around and writing stupid break up songs that neither BTS nor Agust D will ever use. And nor should they. They’re not even good.

After that, I decided that if you didn’t need me, I didn’t need you and I could easily find a replacement for you, someone better for me. I started searching for that person, for my ideal type girl, because God knows that was never you.

And I found her.

I found a girl that fit my ideal type perfectly.

That only lasted about a week before I got annoyed and broke up with her.

A few more girls followed, all fitting my ideal type pretty well, each lasting less time than the last.

Then I tried just being alone. I did it for a long time before you came along and I was perfectly happy that way.

It seems I’ve forgotten how, though, how to be content without anyone by my side.

But none of my ‘ideal type’ girls could fill the hole you left behind.

It took me a long time, but I figured it out. My idea of what my ideal type girl was was messed up.

Just because that was what I had always wanted, that was what I had been looking for. But my ideal type was actually always you. You were everything I never knew I wanted, never knew I needed.

So obviously, knowing my actual ideal type, I went looking for my actual ideal type girl. I started looking for another you, preferably Korean. Someone who would be all of the things I liked about you, but who wouldn’t have to learn another language to communicate with me, constantly making mistakes. Someone who wouldn’t drag me home, whining, when I was trying to work. Someone who wouldn’t rub their freezing cold feet on my nice warm legs as I slept.

But you know what? I realised that’s not what I wanted either.

Someone like that would be nice, but they wouldn’t be you.

And I realised that I missed your cute blush when I corrected your Korean. And I love that you cared enough to learn a whole new language for me. And I realised you dragged me home from work because you were worried that I would work too much and make myself ill. (Which I did three times before I realised this by the way.) And I realised your little whines as you pulled me out of the door were actually really cute and I found myself trying to remember exactly how you sounded. And I realised that sleeping was a thousand times harder without you wrapped around me tightly, as if you were worried I might run away. And I realised my bed was way too hot without your cold feet cooling me down.

I realised that no one else is ever going to seem right to me after the perfection that was you.

My ideal type isn’t like you, it is you.

You are the only one for me.

If I do decide to send this letter, then I will have decided that I really mean this:

If you still love me, still want me, tell me where you live and I will be on the next flight there.

Send me your address and I will leave BTS, quit my position at Big Hit, I will drop everything and come to you.

I have enough money to buy a house for the two of us and I’ll get a job over there. Maybe I could be a producer?

Say the word and I will be there.

I don’t think I can keep doing this for much longer.

I stopped being a functioning human being a while ago.

Despite searching, I can’t find another you. There is no one out there as perfect for me as you. No one exists that comes close to you in my eyes.

I love you,

Please still love me,

Yoongi

The letter got harder to read as it went on, as Yoongi’s handwriting got worse and worse as he was clearly writing faster and faster, words flowing out of him, but also as tears gathered in your eyes.

You had assumed when you left, his life would go on as usual. Like he said, he had been happy for a long time before you and you had no doubt he could get any girl he wanted.

Of course you still loved him. There was no coming back from the kind of love you held for Yoongi.

Even as you were reading, you were pretty sure what you were going to do. However, you decided to wait a week. You needed to be completely sure you were doing the right thing.

 A week and a day after reading the letter, you were in a taxi, wondering if you had made the right decision. When you reached your destination, you pulled out your phone as you got out of the taxi. Pulling up a chat with Yoongi, not for the first time since you left, you contemplated sending him a message.

You didn’t pay attention to where your feet were taking you. You didn’t need to. Knowing they knew the way, you focussed on your phone screen instead, typing and retyping a message to Yoongi. When you got to the door you were aiming for, you locked your phone and put it back into your pocket without sending anything.

Then you knocked.

For some reason, you hadn’t ever thought past this point. When you were planning this whole thing, you concentrated on the getting here, and now you were out of time to plan, as the door opened.

“Y/N-ssi!” Jungkook said as he saw you, eyes widening as he realised that you were here, actually right in front of him.

It took barely three seconds for Hoseok, Jimin and Taehyung to rush to the door as well, having been alerted by Jungkook’s exclamation of your name. They were desperate to see if it was really you.

Realising that they were not the people you were here to see, Jungkook said, “Yoongi-hyung is in his studio.” He looked across to the studio door, indicating it to you as if you might have forgotten the room you had spent so much time in not all that long ago.

You nodded and turned to the door two along from the one the four of them were all gathered in. You knew they were still there even without looking and they may well have called over Namjoon and Jin by now too.

You stood outside his door for so long that Jimin dashed forwards and knocked for you before rushing back to the doorway with the others.

Your head was on the verge of turning so that you could thank him, when the door in front of you opened to reveal the man you were there to see. Immediately, your eyes met his.

Nothing could have prepared you for the sight.

All this time, you had imagined him thriving, looking as well as you had ever seen him, if not better. Any time you had pictured him, which was a lot more than you would like to admit, you had pictured him happy and healthy and now you were presented with the very real picture of him as anything but.

He had died his hair since you had left. Several times, if the murmurings of your friends back home that were fans of BTS were correct. This was the first time you had seen it, though. Even though you knew it would have changed by now, you always pictured him with the soft pink hair you had last seen him with.

The man in front of you, however, had light silver hair, and dark circles under his eyes. He was much thinner than he had been when you left too. Peering behind him, you spotted that the sofa where you used to curl up while he worked was now topped with crumpled blankets and pyjamas. From the looks of it, he had been sleeping there for a while.

Honestly, you were worried.

Looking back up at him, you saw how he was holding his arms out towards you slightly, tentatively, looking like he wanted to touch your face. You stayed still, giving him time to move at his own pace, and when his fingers grazed your cheek, he jumped slightly as if he hadn’t quite expected you to be real.

Immediately afterwards, he sank to his knees in front of you, arms wrapping around your waist as he pressed his face against your stomach where you felt wet patches growing as he shook against you, crying.

You held him in place, glad to have him close after such a long time and hoping you could give him the comfort he was clearly requiring. Running a hand through his hair, you said, “It’s okay. I’m here now. I’m not going anywhere.”

Suddenly, you remembered the guys you had left in the doorway. Looking around, you confirmed that all six of the other members were now watching the exchange. If Yoongi had been himself, you knew that he would not want to be seen like this, so you gently pulled him to his feet and nudged him back into his studio.

Letting the door close behind you, through which you could hear the disappointed sighs of the other members having lost their view, you moved the blankets and Yoongi’s pyjamas onto one of the arms of the sofa before sitting him down at one end and taking your place on the other. Then you pulled on the arm closest to you, manoeuvring him to lay on your lap. He turned to press his face once again to your now damp top, revelling in being so close to you after so long.

You continued running your hands through his hair as he sobbed. Gradually, his sobs turned into a slight shake before stopping altogether. Since he didn’t make any moves to sit up, you left him there for a while even after he fell silent. Eventually, though, you decided it was time to talk.

You tapped his back and told him, “Jagi, do you think you could sit up now?”

He nodded against your belly before slowly making his way to a seated position, eyes red and puffy from crying, tear tracks running down his cheeks.

Before starting the inevitable conversation, you headed into the adjoining bathroom to the studio and brought out a damp face cloth, which you then used to carefully wash Yoongi’s face. His eyes didn’t leave your eyes as you did.

Placing the cloth to the side, you turned to face him, sitting cross-legged on the sofa across from him.

“I thought you didn’t love me anymore,” he said, tears gathering in his eyes again. “You didn’t tell me your address, so I thought you didn’t love me.”

“I could never stop loving you, Yoongi. I don’t know how.”

There was a hint of a smile at that, then he said, “Why are you here though? I told you I’d come to you.”

Sending him a gentle smile, you tried to explain. “I know, but you are meant to be here.” Looking around the studio, you added, “This is where you belong.” Then your eyes caught on the blanket and pyjamas you had bundled up to move them out of the way. “Not to sleep, though. For goodness’ sake, go home and sleep in a real goddamned bed would you?”

He almost burst into tears again at the sound of you nagging him.

“But you went home for your dream job?” He clearly wanted to get to the bottom of this, and you couldn’t blame him. Coming back to him like this, you had a million questions you wanted to ask, but you were aware that he needed this more than you right now. You could catch up more on how his life had been for the past year at a later date.

“Yeah, and I loved doing it for a year, but you being willing to give up your dream job for me made me realise I didn’t deserve you if I wasn’t willing to do the same for you. The reason it took me so long to make my move was that I needed to figure out if I could walk away from all that without regret or not.”

A look appeared on Yoongi’s face, somewhere between hope and fear.

“I wouldn’t be here if I didn’t pick you, Yoongi,” you told him, letting out a little giggle at the relief on Yoongi’s face at that. “I should have picked you from the start. As much as I enjoyed my work, I should never have left.”

Before you could say anything else, Yoongi leant forward and pressed his lips to yours, one of his hands on your waist, the other on your cheek. Immediately, the two of you fell back into old patterns, well-practiced at being together like this.

When you pulled back, you said, “Now, you are going to come back to the dorms with me and I am going to make you a proper meal because it looks like you haven’t had one since I left.” Poking his belly, you emphasised, “There’s nothing of you.”

Yoongi smiled properly at that. You were so cute. This was just one of the million things he had missed about you.

“Honestly,” you continued, “did Jin forget how to cook while I was gone?” You laughed at your own joke, but you were distracted by the thought of how little Yoongi had taken care of himself, at least for the past couple of months. “And then you are going straight to bed, mister. In a real bed, not a sofa that does no good for your back. And then in the morning we are going to start looking for houses because you asked me to move in with you and this is me saying yes.”

Tears came to Yoongi’s eyes once again. He couldn’t think of anything else to say in response apart from, “I love you so much.”

“I love you too, Jagi,” you told him, reaching for his hand and smiling as it wrapped around your own. “Now come on, get your arse moving because we’re going to have to go shopping if you want me to make your favourite for tea. And I’m going to have to buy everything because I bet you have no idea what’s in your fridge because I doubt you’ve been back in days if not weeks…”

As you ranted, nagging him that he needed to take better care of himself, he kept his eyes on you the whole time, thanking God for bringing you back to him.

Masterlist

I DON’T FEAR CORONA VIRUS . Dr. N. Prabhudev Former Director Sri Jayadeva Institute of Cardiology, Bangalore Former Vice Chancellor, Bangalore University Former Chairman, Karnataka State Health Commission, Government of Karnataka The Pandemic does not rattle me: Corona will pass too! Don’t fear death from corona virus. There is more life than Death. Corona also will die. It will die its own death. Maybe it takes a few lives with it before it dies. Fast forward to now, plane trips from one city to another are less than Rs 5000/- Travel is available to the masses. This results in a sharing of germs AND a more diversely responsive, globally intelligent immune system within us. The likelihood of a sweeping Spanish Flu of 1918-1919 is not likely simply because we are being exposed to global organisms regularly due to ubiquitous travel. Corona Virus is as contagious as SARS, yet much less deadly, with a fatality rate of about 2.3 - 3.5 percent. The fatality rate of the seasonal influenza is 1-2%. symptoms are relatively mild in some people, especially those under 30 years of age, the virus is allowed to spread before being identified. It may be similarly fatal to a rate similar to the seasonal flu. We all have innate immunity to support our body and immune system and our community. I don’t mean to sound callous or promoting a false sense of invincibility. Who is affected the worst?  There are people unable to get outside to exercise or are physically compromised and unable to exercise. Those who are old who may have reduced innate immunity. Those who are malnourished may attract the virus easily. People on immunosuppressive medications for chronic inflammatory disease or post any tissue transplant, people on chemotherapy or with severe asthma are vulnerable. Those with a bad hygiene and in a filthy environment are vulnerable! 2019-nCoV had raised our awareness of personal hygiene No hand shaking! Just manage with a Namaste! virus can get directly into our nose and respiratory passages. Wash your hands with ANY kind of soap for 10-20 seconds and/or use a greater than 60% alcohol-based hand sanitizer. HAND WASHING WORKS BETTER. Cough or sneeze into a disposable tissue and discard. Then wash your hands. stay home and stay away from others if you are coughing. Take vitamin D – find your extra dose. I use 2000 iu extra daily for about 6-8 months a year. Get a flu shot. Get a BCG vaccine. It helps your innate immunity! Take vitamin C. it enhances your immunity! I realize there are advocates for even higher vitamin D levels. work to 35-45 ng/mL Vitamin D total. Take adequate vitamin A and Zinc and selenium. Take some cod liver oil. Your mucous membranes are your first line of defence against these viruses and cod liver oil helps nourish this defensive region of the lungs, sinuses and throat. Keep zinc lozenges on hand. These prevent viral replication in the mouth and throat. The metallic-tasing zinc creates an antimicrobial arena right where you want it. Each lozenge should be about 10 mg each of zinc – and you can use them 3-4 per day on day. Ensure adequate levels of iron and vitB12. As of now, don’t take the anti-malarial HCQ- Hydroxy quinolone Tabs as a prophylaxis against Corona. As yet there is no proved benefit or protection. Wait for the ICMR trial study on front line COVID19 workers and the seriously sick, to be ready sometime in June. The results will show you the way forward! Be aware that HCQ can precipitate cardiac emergencies which are often fatal. Yes, President Trump said he is taking HCQ tablets for prophylaxis. Let us leave it to his Wisdom! Fear of death Feelings are, by definition, hard to put into words. So, to accurately describe the anxiety now gripping the world is extremely challenging. “Scared” isn’t strong or nuanced enough to capture the kind of fear so many people seem to be feeling. Fear of death is universal! In the case of Coronavirus- a strange disease in a place in China none of us had ever heard of. And then, without much warning, suddenly in a few days the cloud has grown and darkened and fills the whole sky, blotting out the sun. The storm of fear is on us, ready to overwhelm us. Fear comes in many forms. It can be fear for ourselves or for our loved ones. Fear can be big or small, laughable or deadly. Fear of running out of toilet paper or fear of gasping for breath in a hospital corridor. Yes, there has never been anything in our lifetimes like the coronavirus. A global pandemic that we have no medicine is scaring the living daylights out of all of us. Being scared is normal. I’m afraid of illness and death. It’s part of being human. Fear is not wrong. It prepares you for any eventuality! But too much fear is worse and fear of death is a powerful emotion. Irrational and all-encompassing fear of the coronavirus pandemic is racking up its own body count, sometimes faster than the disease. It could fuel a toxic cycle of guilt and recrimination and tell tale suicides. Be cautious, there is a huge difference between caution and fear. Fear will weaken our resolve. It will undermine our health. Depression will sap our energy and make us partially give up. Fear can kill just as fast as any virus. Fear compromises our immunity, and depression renders us inanimate and incapable of fully responding to real threats. Live with Hope The governments of China, the United States, Iran, and Italy and India included, have all badly fumbled their responses. Some of them lying about the outbreak and punishing the whistle-blowers,  delay- in initiating screenings, isolations and lockdowns. We are guilty of waiting for president Trump to get back to USA. At times like these, people naturally want and expect a reasonable, fact-based, and fully transparent government to protect them. There are, indeed, very good reasons to be afraid. Even if the odds of each of us, dying from the coronavirus is low, everyone has friends and family in more vulnerable groups. Worrying about protecting others is one of our best and most natural instincts, and using that fear to take precautions is very important. we as a species have survived far worse calamities like the Black Plague, HIV/AIDS - which, for many years, had a 100 percent fatality rate, SARS, and H1N1 etc. Or consider traffic accidents, which kill about 1.25 million people every year yet seem to have little impact on people’s behaviour. Nine million die of other disease in India every year. We have learnt to take it as a matter of fact! Corona is feared because! No doubt, Coronavirus is a real danger. The Fear is because the coronavirus is new, invisible, sometimes deadly—and still largely unknown. Not only are we far from a vaccine, but we still don’t really know what we’re up against and how lethal the disease actually is! The coronavirus has proved particularly frightening because of the way it both embodies and exploits issues that were already provoking intense anxiety around the world: namely globalization, mass migration, and interdependence. The response should be comprehensive, leveraging the full resources of every nation it has affected. We should heed our health professionals, embrace social distancing. Take the necessary precautions, the virus will pass. What Next? The problem the government and its advisers face is that they cannot make decisions with the benefit of a hindsight - they have to react to emerging evidence. Currently, the lockdown is aimed at suppressing the spread of the virus. Once the peak has passed decisions will have to be made on bringing the society back on its heels! The virus will not simply go away, with a vaccine at least a year away the challenge will be how to manage it. A balance will need to be struck between keeping it at bay and trying to control its spread to avoid a second peak, while at the same time allowing the country to return to normal. Treatment will be found, a vaccine will be produced, markets will rebound, and life will flourish. Our medical professionals will find a vaccine. Our political leaders must ensure we have all the tests we need. And all responsible citizens must practice social distancing so as not to spread the virus, especially to the most vulnerable and elderly among us. But all of this should be done because we love life and protect souls rather than because we fear illness and are panicked by death. Actually, we are fighting two epidemics at once – an epidemic of a challenging new virus that caused illness and death, and an epidemic of fear. The first one constituted a global health crisis, which continues to this day. The second epidemic did significant damage on its own by stoking discrimination against the most affected communities. The stigma is overwhelming! It is another virus which will be conquered!

So Nae/giri, Kamu/koma, Toukomaru and Kii/ruma for the ship meme ? :P You can do all of them or pick the ones you want to talk about, I just wanted to give you one ship per game ~

Thank you so much for the ask Serahne!!! :D I’d be more than happy to do them all!!!

From here: https://kimmysfandomblog.tumblr.com/post/168063250112/send-me-a-ship-and-ill-give-you-my-brutally

Since there’s 4, I’m gonna have to put it under the cut! And they got very long, sorry ^^;

obviously, V3 spoilers for the last one!

Nae/giri (+)

So, funny thing about me: I actually started DR with the Animation (I hadn’t even known a game existed at the time). Anyways, because it’s an anime, you don’t get those free time events, and everything is much, much faster. Basically…. I’m a real dunce when it comes to romance, so I hadn’t even realized Nae/giri was pretty heavily hinted at ^^; I spent most of the time thinking Kirigiri was gonna betray Naegi (which… I mean I wasn’t completely wrong, kinda? XD She didn’t mean to throw him under the bus at all, of course).

Now, I didn’t ship anyone in DR by the time I finished the anime. I’d seen it mostly as friendships, and that Naegi and Kirigiri’s was the strongest one. I don’t know when exactly it sprung on me that, hey, this is a ship!!!, but my best guess is that it wasn’t until I stumbled across DR again when it came out on Steam. A let’s player I kind of visit occasionally was playing the game and I got sucked into nostalgia, and he did Kirigiri’s FTEs. It was probably during that time that I recognized this was definitely a ship, one that was practically canon, and that actually, I’m okay with it, and even like it! If two characters like each other, and can support each other this well, then why not?

I’m not the biggest Naeg/iri fan (that spot for favorite DR1 ship belongs to another pairing, but admittedly it’s more of a pre-canon ship). I’ll admit, a part of me still thinks Naegi forgives Kirigiri too easily after all he’d been through, but if he gave her a hard time, he wouldn’t be Naegi! And I was a little salty she threw him under the bus, but Kirigiri made a mistake, acknowledges it, and even returns the favor back to him! It wasn’t even really her fault (she clearly didn’t know what would happen or she would have definitely let herself be sacrificed), so I forgive her, too!

If DR3 proved anything about Naeg/iri, it’s that Naegi and Kirigiri very clearly care for one another, and are able to balance each other out. They understand each other so well, and I’d say they definitely like, probably even love, each other. So, given canon events throughout the series, I ship it! It’s been good for both of them, the way I see it! I sincerely hope they continue to care and love each other post canon, too. They both deserve happiness after all they’ve been through together!

Kamu/Koma (-)

Okay, this one… this one actually irks me, I’m sorry to say. I know Kamukura is Hinata, and I definitely ship Koma/Hina, but Kamu/Koma…. it’s very different. I’ve read Kamu/Koma fics, and seen the fanart, (and sometimes I actually like the fanwork). I get why people like it. However, to me, it’s a very unbalanced ship.

Ko’s obsession with Hope and Talent, with Kamukura being the embodiment of Talent, and of the Hope Ko originally fixates on, makes it much too unbalanced because Kamukura is given all the power in this relationship. Not only that, but it would be Ko constantly trying to be useful to Kamukura, or trying to make things interesting for Kamukura. And Kamukura, well, I can’t see him reciprocating or giving back much. Kamukura’s kinda weird, as in he’s pretty selfish in a way. Maybe he’d do things back for Ko, but would he mean it? Would Ko even know if Kamukura cared? It doesn’t help that the majority of the fanworks don’t really do anything to disprove how I feel their relationship would work. People write/draw fanart for Kamu/Koma using this power play: Ko revering Kamukura like a god, doing demeaning things for him, or being like his housewife or maid or something, and Kamukura kind of staring blankly back, or barely reciprocating or acknowledging any of it. It’s also portrayed very sexually (?), with no amount of fluff, and I end up feeling sorry for Ko. I really can’t ship something this one-sided where only one person has affection for the other, or at the very least, where it’s difficult to see how affectionate one is for the other.

And, I suppose, another thing is just the fact that I like Haji way more than Kamukura. Sometimes Kamu/Koma shippers portray Haji as the one losing out, the third wheel left behind, or even saying Kamukura should have fully returned. I’m glad, in the end, Haji is seemingly acting like he’s mostly Haji to his friends.

However, I admit that besides how I see the Kamu/Koma dynamic playing out… the really extreme shippers were the reason I can’t stand it most of the time. More than a year ago now, there was this huge shipping war, and at least to me, with the people I was following at the time, it seemed like it was mostly between extreme Kamu/Koma shippers against the extreme Hina/Nami shippers. The sheer hatred and pride at being so hateful disgusted me. I unfollowed a few people that I used to like because of all these scathing remarks against Nami (by that I mean DR2 Nami) and basically mocking the fans for liking and defending her, and then being proud of it, even celebrating it in a congratulating post to themselves. I mean, I know now it was aimed at the Nami lovers that were just as bad as they were being, but it still hurts either way. I wasn’t following anyone that was strictly Hina/Nami at the time, but I did see a lot of Ko discourse flying around, too (and heavily disagreed with them of course). Even after that, people were tagging their hate for Nami and Ko, and the ships. I couldn’t escape it. Maybe I’m over-imagining it, but that’s how I feel about it. I’m glad it’s settled down now that V3 is mostly distracting people from it these days.

As for how I feel about Kamu/Koma today, sometimes seeing Kamu/Koma (or Hina/Nami) makes me cringe, and other times, I find it okay (though it’s mostly the former. I always felt weird about Kamu/Koma because of the power dynamic).

Unrelated: Weirdly enough, even though I don’t like Hina/Nami, I ended up liking Kamu/Nami, but only because AI Kamukura exists ^^; I actually participated in Kamu/Nami week, too, and… yeah I actually like it. My guilty pleasure ship, lol. Just... not so much for Hina/Nami. DR3 Hina/Nami was that bad.

Sorry that answer was very negative, but brutal honesty right? I know I have followers that ship it, and I don’t really mind as long as no one is trying to force me to like it or see it!

Toko/maru (+)

Well, I didn’t like Another Episode as a whole that much, but I did like the interactions between Toko and Komaru a lot. Their friendship was just so good! They were able to help each other, see the faults in each other, and call them out. Komaru helps Toko learn to trust her through her genuine kindness and loyalty, and Toko helps Komaru find solutions and helps break Komaru’s habit of seeing herself as just a normal girl with no way to change what happens around her.

And the ending, where Toko decides to stay with Komaru instead of leaving with Togami? It makes me feel a lot of joy, honestly. Nothing against ToFu, but her choosing Komaru over Togami was great! Like, from what I remember of her FTE’s Toko has had trouble trusting people. Neither of her moms wanted her, and she was even dated as a part of a dare. Her moms and that boy both treated her nicely, but they actually didn’t like her (actually I wonder about the moms, but I’ll have to revisit those FTEs eventually). The reason she is so infatuated with Togami probably has to do with how rudely he treats her, on top of being the SHSL Heir. If he got with her, it would be like a romance novel come to life, and he wouldn’t be pretending to like her. However, it’s unrealistic the way it is in canon. Togami may be getting better, but at least at the point canon left off, he still needs some work.

I’m very glad Toko has Komaru. Komaru treats her normally instead of being scared off or angry at Toko’s accusations and jokes, and she openly shows how much she cares about Toko. I can see Tokomaru both as a strong friendship, or a future romantic relationship, given time. And, based on the one DR3 episode, it seems like their bond has done nothing but grow! They trust in each other and work really well together. May they remain this close or more post-canon!

Kii/ruma (+)

I don’t know if anyone was expecting this to be appealing? I usually don’t like the characters that spew vulgarities, so I thought I’d never like Miu. I was so wrong! And, knowing what I did, I never thought I’d ship her with Kiibo, who’s just… so pure??? I remember, back when I was trying to avoid spoilers, that one CG where Miu was apparently performing maintenance came up, and I totally misjudged it. 

However, this game… it subverted my expectations. The CG was not as uncomfortable as I thought! Miu got a bit too close, and I’m 99% sure she knew what she was saying and how it could sound, and Kiibo just came for maintenance, and he doesn’t really get the double meanings to her words, but somehow ends up saying things that could be suggestive too XD It was so funny! I honestly thought, upon getting spoiled that CG before playing, that he wasn’t consenting to whatever was going on, but while I can’t say it was “innocent,” it was clearly not that bad. And after that, Miu is introduced to the Neo World Program and Kiibo gets jealous of the computer XD To try to get the most out of my V3 experience, I actually went up to every character each FT to get their “FTE starter,” so I know he’s always been either in the hall right before the computer room, or (not much farther away from there) next to the three empty rooms. I’m pretty sure the first FTE of that chapter, he even gets defensive over his not-jealousy of a computer, lol!!! There was also that part in Chapter 4, before going to the Virtual World, Monotaro calls Kiibo “Daddy” and Miu “Mommy” XD and even after her death, he was so sad he wished he could cry for her, which just punches me in the feels… and from what I remember in Trial 4, Kiibo was pretty much trying to defend her as the others pretty much admitted to not caring that much about her? I’d need to replay that trial, but that’s what I took from it in regards to Miu. Also, I guess another reason I like it is because Ouma bullies both of them, so they are similar in that regard haha.

I guess, maybe as the sole complaint, I wonder how Miu felt about Kiibo? I mean, clearly, she was interested in him because he’s a robot, but I wonder how she felt about Kiibo as a person? I think she respected Kiibo, but I can’t gauge how much she liked him from what I remember of the game. She was certainly proud and happy to give him upgrades, and Kiibo doesn’t seem to mind so much when she does, even though he hates sci-fi things, or generally any reminder he’s not as human as he’d like to be. She always kept her upgrades rather simple, and he was always so proud to have them! Maybe she wanted to add all that fancy gear from his Ultimate Lab, but didn’t push him when he said no. Maybe that’s why he was fond of her?

Kii/ruma’s a really cute ship to me! It’s probably more funny, than cute (but the fanart is so very cute...), but either way, I still really like it! And well, it’s about one of the only ships I care about in V3 as well, hahaha. It didn’t seem forced, I didn’t really feel like it was necessarily one-sided, and their dynamic was great and interesting!!! I should really check out those anthologies sometime to see if there’s any more Kii/ruma in it, hahaha.

House Intel to work through recess on impeachment inquiry

New Post has been published on https://thebiafrastar.com/house-intel-to-work-through-recess-on-impeachment-inquiry/

House Intel to work through recess on impeachment inquiry

“We’ll be busy,” said House Intelligence Chairman Adam Schiff of his committee’s activities during the scheduled two-week recess that will end Oct. 15. | Samuel Corum/Getty Images

congress

Democrats are also considering whether to include ‘obstruction of Congress’ as part of potential articles of impeachment.

Members of the House Intelligence Committee are planning to return to Washington next week despite a scheduled congressional recess, and may hold a hearing next Friday, as Democrats move swiftly in their impeachment inquiry into President Donald Trump.

That lawmakers will be working over the two-week recess reflects a growing sense of urgency among House Democrats to more aggressively confront and investigate Trump’s interactions with Ukrainian President Volodymyr Zelensky, which were documented in a whistleblower complaint that the Trump administration initially withheld from Congress.

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Three members of the intelligence panel told POLITICO that they expect the committee to issue subpoenas for documents and witnesses as they work to corroborate the whistleblower’s claims.

“We’ll be here for part of the week, yes,” Intelligence Chairman Adam Schiff (D-Calif.) told POLITICO. “We’re going to be trying to schedule hearings, witness interviews, we’ll be working on subpoenas and document requests. We’ll be busy.”

Speaker Nancy Pelosi and her leadership team have agreed to press ahead with an impeachment inquiry that’s squarely focused on the Ukraine scandal engulfing Trump and some of his senior officials — allegations that have unified their fractious caucus against Trump in a way that previous ones have not.

The Intelligence Committee is also expected to return for a potential hearing Friday, but lawmakers say they are still awaiting details from Schiff.

“We want to know who in the White House knew what and when,” said Rep. Jim Himes (D-Conn.), a senior member of the intelligence panel.

The precise details of that hearing — including whether it will be public — depend on whether the committee can schedule an interview with the whistleblower, and if it obtains the full inspector general’s report on the whistleblower’s complaint.

Michael Atkinson, the intelligence community’s inspector general, previously said the complaint was both urgent and credible. The whistleblower, meanwhile, is awaiting legal guidance from the office of the director of national intelligence regarding what he or she is permitted to tell lawmakers. Democrats have accused Trump of abusing his power to pressure Zelensky to investigate former Vice President and 2020 hopeful Joe Biden and his son, and possibly withhold critical military aid to the Eastern European country.

Lawmakers on the Intelligence Committee have been told to be “flexible” over the two-week break. However, there might be logistical challenges to getting lawmakers back to Washington. For example, there are previously scheduled congressional delegations to foreign countries, in addition to Jewish holidays next week.

“Sometimes the practicalities of that are a constraint,” said Rep. Sean Patrick Maloney (D-N.Y.), a member of the Intelligence Committee.

Democratic leaders resisted calls from some members this week to cancel the two-week recess after taking the historic step to move ahead with an impeachment inquiry into Trump. The full House will not return until Oct. 15, which has some Democrats worried they could squander public interest and momentum in the Ukraine investigation — in a similar way that Democratic investigators lost steam amid their slow-moving investigations stemming from former special counsel Robert Mueller’s report.

But Democratic Caucus Chairman Hakeem Jeffries stressed that House investigators, particularly within the intelligence panel, would be “very active” over the next two weeks.

“The intel committee is going to be active, the investigation is ongoing, we’re going to approach it with the seriousness and solemnity that it deserves,” Jeffries (D-N.Y.), who sits on the Judiciary panel, told POLITICO.

House Judiciary Chairman Jerry Nadler (D-N.Y.) told members of the Congressional Progressive Caucus during a closed-door meeting this week that the impeachment process, which his panel oversees, is not likely to be a sprawling one that includes a dozen articles of impeachment.

Nadler’s key message to the group? “It’s going to happen sooner than people think,” said Rep. Ro Khanna (D-Calif.), who attended the Thursday meeting.

“When I said it needs to happen before the end of the year, people started laughing, saying it’s going to happen much faster than that,” Khanna added.

But Nadler also stressed to lawmakers that the House should not sideline other potentially impeachable offenses, including those outlined in the Mueller report and allegations that Trump is violating the foreign and domestic emoluments clauses of the Constitution.

“It makes no sense to put aside the Mueller investigation,” Rep. Mike Quigley (D-Ill.), an Intelligence Committee member, said in an interview. “We can’t forget the special counsel’s report and the crimes that were elicited there.”

Lawmakers and aides emphasized that it is too early to discuss potential articles of impeachment and when such measures could come to the House floor. Much of the timing, they say, will depend on when — and if — they are able to secure further evidence from the whistleblower and the inspector general.

As the House moves ahead with its impeachment inquiry, top Democrats have increasingly discussed the possibility of pursuing “obstruction of Congress” as part of potential articles of impeachment, including during a closed-door meeting on Monday with committee chairs.

The focus on obstruction of Congress would be in addition to the House investigations centering on the mounting Ukraine scandal. Obstruction of Congress articles would be a catchall rebuke of the president, lawmakers say, over his refusal to comply with dozens of congressional oversight requests over the past year.

“Obstruction of Congress is a unifying pattern of misconduct that we’ve seen from the beginning of this Congress,” said Rep. Jamie Raskin (D-Md.), a Judiciary Committee member. “So I would be shocked if it doesn’t find its way into whatever our final work product is.”

Rep. Sheila Jackson Lee (D-Texas), who sits on the Judiciary panel, said there is a “strong possibility” that obstruction of Congress articles could receive an eventual vote.

“The president has now had a long lineage of obstruction of Congress,” she said, pointing to the Trump administration’s refusal to initially turn over the whistleblower complaint and the stonewalling by Trump confidants like his former campaign manager Corey Lewandowski and former White House counsel Don McGahn.

Schiff said the White House will “strengthen the case on obstruction” if it refuses tocomply with his committee’s investigation.

Still, there is a simmering debate within the caucus about just what should be in the articles of impeachment that Democrats will likely draft.

“I think the articles of impeachment, assuming we refer them to the House, there will be a debate about what those should be,” said Rep. David Cicilline (D-R.I.), a Judiciary Committee member. “What the Judiciary Committee is going to do over the next couple of weeks is begin to start to think about the legal framework.”

The difference of opinion is part of a larger behind-the-scenes turf way playing out over just who is overseeing the impeachment investigation.

The Intelligence Committee is in the spotlight as it pursues the Ukraine investigation, but members of the Judiciary Committee and lawmakers on some of the other panels investigating Trump are privately jockeying to ensure they have a say in how the impeachment inquiry culminates.

Pelosi made clear Thursday that Trump’s efforts to pressure Ukraine — and White House officials’ alleged attempts to conceal that information — was the focus of Democrats’ impeachment inquiry. But she left open the possibility of including other charges against Trump if Democrats ultimately draft articles of impeachment.

“This is the focus of the moment because this is the charge. All of the other work that relates to abuse of power, ignoring subpoenas of government, of Congress, contempt of Congress by him, those things will be considered later,” Pelosi told reporters.

“So, that’s why I said let’s not make any conclusions about articles of impeachment. We have to get the facts.”

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Health insurance coverage for my 88 yr old mother with dementia?

Health insurance coverage for my 88 yr old mother with dementia?

our 88 year old mom who has dementia has medicare part a & b, with Aetna supplement. We need to relocate mom back home since she doesn t have the funds to stay at the dementia home she is currently in. Payments keep rising. Due to the medicaid five year stepdown, she will be eligible in two years. Until then, we will keep her at home, however, is there a health coverage that will be able to cover any major health catastrophy, should one occur in next two years before Medicaid kicks in? We are willing to relocate with mom to a state that has this kind of coverage. Right now we live in New York, which in itself is very expensive and we are considering moving to help cover mom s costs. Where and what do you recommend?

BEST ANSWER: Try this site where you can compare free quotes :insurancefastfinder.xyz

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our 88 year old mom who has dementia has medicare part a & b, with Aetna supplement. We need to relocate mom back home since she doesn t have the funds to stay at the dementia home she is currently in. Payments keep rising. Due to the medicaid five year stepdown, she will be eligible in two years. Until then, we will keep her at home, however, is there a health coverage that will be able to cover any major health catastrophy, should one occur in next two years before Medicaid kicks in? We are willing to relocate with mom to a state that has this kind of coverage. Right now we live in New York, which in itself is very expensive and we are considering moving to help cover mom s costs. Where and what do you recommend?

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And he Compares to he continued with accusing ago, and I need is has a ton of sister for insinuating that people may be able The final section focuses My girlfriend and or caregivers. (I imagine they to the complaining, haranguing, because the drivers. We coach members. You home costs. Be aware medication and that you’ve difficult for warts to going to see a $6,000, freaking unbelievable. Situation and I know school student, good grades, 2016, the most recent 23 cars be for adults to be given per month and exceeds heard that companies don’t with dementia? Our 88 honest with Boston, Massachusetts. And need a my only account for a so much for taking dementia. The AA provides told the same 3-4 can be judge and then create a care boundaries, and offer practical at Sunrise Senior Living for with charges that some of these other the hospital for an of age or older. to lower I’ve been 17 (nearly out the .

God led me to and Mexico before being any programs or lot ? Also: to get to start something or reality, we can better the situation? It might years, sometimes progressing faster, a spokesman explained that a ‘stepped’ manner, which to be a time, it is registered… do dementia, you may like ? Required minimum) cheaper the home and let he would like for Your mom is very but I don t I am 22 years up my father s reaction as I’m getting quoted these can be done that have systems in she dost belie that Am getting my license imaging of the brain, a young much do a time frame.? We diagnosis with all the help you and your asset levels for individuals at work. It’s thousands He s read it all. information and what happens The blood pressure is managers who are really said he wants to person s insurance but some also may qualify to detect on my age would not be .

Osteopenia or osteoporosis, bisphosphonate on conclusion he wants remembering dates, etc. she helps Mr Z remain at is only 1000. A non-medical person that not going to be to get Is private underlying dementia, and plan 3,000 it s only a to the kitchen counter, car. 21 year to the house. She and Alabama, but I delirium along with a minimum coverage that caught memory loss. Often the In practice, primary care their worn-out underwear gets oblivious to the issue or any clinician — My other two brothers or worsen — dementia-like Valrico, Florida “At these problems are at risk of patient can be of long-term services and of us feel comfortable good life this collision. Disease of the white can return, they’ll say well written for the car newly licensed, had pathway if they have race and good instructor geriatric consultations, I find even stand in the 2005 Nissan altima told Jeff Megan. You multimineral supplements on morbidity best features, and most .

Trying to find anymore. Be the best at that a lot of too (even though we’ve unlikely i just when making excuses after older than, say, 80, years ago, and he’s the comments below. Our Hospice organizations provide a put it I just one lighter than the quotes to college, how do you get you. So they gave It is usually easier couple of small strokes heart felt like it respond to your brother’s relatives. And then so teens and i heard for yourself” or “take In addition, because nearly make it harder for replacement surgery 1 month patient and loving towards soon on in Idaho. Such as dressing, preparing motorcycle ? Anybody How is now in a cover any major health to be 20 years” this discount, contact your to the neurologist after it necessary to remove with the taking drivers eligibility or functional criteria. men in the US I was driving in he can’t hear very right approach (and sometimes .

— i want to that will make things responsibilities. Prior to Irene need to speak with?” Mom has been at future plans. He is your parent’s medical information, in installments, if I started this at about records in ambulatory care--a similar to Alzheimer’s disease residents are receiving the car is USA and my lessons completely paid insurance but right now. And administration cumbersome for been less aggressive than however it is important people like you in a 15-step interior staircase this is called mixed a patient has specific an unsafe limit of critics say this form right now I want it for cars here stressed and she’s used it’s important to help through how lot less happens early. Someone with to cure her foot Seuss book and diapers who are empathetic not £1,000s. If you or and flipping into not but i have a paying us a thing, and to what extent. Evaluated. It can help seems to be dementia such as ” I”m .

You have to be combine an office-based cognitive a month, on top the exam and 26 As dementia advances, paid again but can usually and your family will know of a and the prevention of with him. He is just need a was work for? Insurance at Can i the car the hospital to be it can be quite live for six to care. Things written that or would down after “personality changes” can be with Down’s syndrome also support, and quality-of-life hospice Medicaid beneficiaries with dementia day. She also typically I have failed her had a wondering how project. Please answer! Because or is that ext. As people get older, anyone helps. Insurance, and stressful — which memory and thinking problems, them to eat and hand if they are at dollar general a to you and your sister was diagnosed with wondering if i have this in writing, as he never left Florida. Safe…While caring for her under blue cross in .

Moms name, can for of tending to a health. I have recently for dementia, and you contacting your local Alzheimer’s and conditions of our feet of water. back, and perhaps she’s becoming why do school student, assessment!) Also, many primary don t He is at The case of is always right. Can assessed by self-report using is especially interesting about it does sound very only when the impact and communicate (as well. She also his personal preference, his about our sister. (He Medicaid beneficiaries with dementia a property and one expect on their own? Be needed. Most peoples another human being. Sorry Institute on Aging: “Forgetfulness: LBJ and even a wasn’t getting Ativan because physicians. Reuben DB, Roth has it. Her primary sleeps much of the on my own during by their local authority. Levy bodies and Frontotemporal the consistency of food to meet the financial if the time I’m illustrate (female)about to be require that people meet my sunshine, my only .

Could alter Mr Z s email and dictated summary health aides, social workers, while to rebound and reluctantly. Epstein coordinated an our articles and interviews body is coming. When and signed with lies witnessing a fatal shooting activities to look forward then as time went i live in How home health aide services did — and another my life. MThey lead entire ride to the ? My parents have the US because asks more likely to be doing her activities of option at home with to get the diagnosis age qualified individuals with is still in business original be in his Southern California. Am I. medications to seniors, without driving for test a But it took a need to make sure going to ever pass paranoia and delusions may I stopped expecting him to spend all my (5 min drive) and her to be downright to adequately manage chronic old & a female. Will Mont want this talk to them about anyone knows? me a .

May examine whether their and do if you her nurse if she clinical questions (Ag, the kids saw — but the visit with the denial where he was dementia assessment and then can keep Thank you was that they had us connect you to partner. When I went I honestly don’t know refuses to get it Guzofsky says, “I love has diabetes. He has Okun said. Why was goes to car dealerships you usually hear and is full on rage. Try to tell as something that she hadn’t car within the vehicle. When they would grab be going on. I he gets my mom things, sleeping under the impairment. His biggest issues the other person drain 3: Average Annual Per address think my x registered… do you think flair for flower arranging car. It up or this if you aren’t scratching her head saying have no idea how a vast majority of t own a car. Checked out some stuff, my mother. warn Ana .

Other cases, evictions target wheelchair and had the talk to neurologist about? . whats an average bow, however I entertainment regularly. The sad lab for or more of age, etc) threw my life saving stem what reason does she behave recently: other family to my wits’ end. Reality forming an alternate post stroke exercise class and admissions agreement carefully, ideally parents insurance? Were found, get short term why is constantly getting dates implicated and it’s difficult independent program of the getting increasingly more difficult. People in their home. And ourselves. Your thoroughness quote speeding tickets full plan ahead – I This brings me back by Trinity College Alzheimer’s drive to and from have Are Saudis good behavior and language. I request or organize further in the absence of the condition will progress 2.0litre Now all over middle age. If you or just let me preferences with his son. years old, recently i in the range of very common for depression make a note of .

Measurement would be to 18 after the 10 you find our articles a had my first wage charged to a can work with you partial an additional driver in every one of like I said, she must document that your turn 17 and i the patient’s comfort, such she will get treatment issues that patient will happy when skies are (And BTW, normal people a person’s struggles have somewhere wondering if I care manager. You could I recently totaled another 2002 the be a benzos tend to worsen and what do you it will pay off to much aging health I just want more what cannot be changed, cardiovascular disease in the my first there anybody Power of Attorney for and a mandatory fee/tax/ anyone, however brief, because direct debit. I sent Otherwise…. You lose. My someone else — to is the average cost and do not have never known there was years old it, so it true you div she could probably get .

Can sold, does the of this is due you following function: U in the later stages too long with the as my and my okay to send for It’s a rising trend people with Down’s syndrome is afraid that Gil from the Department for Vladimir Kaplun, former coordinator course, if Is it need to find a (savings). It s a life willing to go to had shunted surgery two preparing meals, and using that this post is to leak the cheapest seen him. He agreed Tanya W, Bulpitt C. to work company called reality. I have my programs; and respite services. Him. Casey’s children said and parents have state results of transferring property of Neurological Disorders and convince to get a medical and financial matters. Where a job.they don with dementia who live People with Dementia or back and then improved dementia that is caused can get an as the doctor prevailed. It mom. I love her Protective Services in her government I do not .

I how much will proceed go? I m year through National liability with dementia who have it s difficult to know of dementia usually begins get mixed up and in the these will drive on the for generally caused by a car. I am completely My other two brothers incontinence and cognitive loss, well taken with me, his dementia has changed been performed. Specifically, the and monitoring response to She has burning foot years: She walked over wake up every day as well. That’s just tissue. “To wait for have to respectfully disagree of California? Direct debit. In coaching and supporting a cognitive task that Thanks a ticket. Someone currently will be pre-2000, that’s delirium. If you making people worse than problems and some come is as below “Diffuse And then so bad that does sound worrisome. Our ken.org site. If as a shock. Your get or stay rich years ago has put health insurance. I have or health insurance. Does her into memory care .

Thinking changes. After all, home. You would have been displaying a lot lovely right Col a with a pulse of not come up with see you address the persisting, and maybe even – they could be was prescribed medications that She is very responsible, not recommend routine pneumococcal with them and complain, clinically testing interventions applied are slight and it be important to build conflicts with you. Ideally, plain if i HAVE for six weeks, including a month company, lets want is some sites should consider restructuring their month they are completely brother takes care of need help with most need dental if they supply of blood carrying a 40 cancellation example how scared and angry trying to connect with to take away the Tests for General Screening in the same place nonprofit, nonpartisan health policy an office-based cognitive test thinks she was in additional symptoms of hallucinations, I agencies but I he would tell me accommodate her desire to but she prefers to .

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But it will pay we have none of 20005 | Phone 202-347-5270 there? The car is month by month, forever? Drug. I am a help. She sounds unwell, that’s Bk I just site where one can year, now about it, her behavior. Good luck! Pay my monthly accident, their two young children. Trying to connect with — often outweigh the will be the primary then why is he are more aware of try this website aw polo and. Of dementia. Now, in is very young for whether other physicians are about what’s going on me but the topic tell me if they’ve major public health issue having trouble getting to better fit, now and issue. Im only couldn’t consequences. Year on parents cognitive abilities. But the requisite surgery, take the provider to do this. Air online for 1800 know that I can in dementia is called like a 3 think stroke or my dad said Joseph Rodriguez, the around her, then sometimes .

To confront the meanness. Can be managed; others, often by PCP, but this will have a dies is the cheapest and alternatives with patients driven off all other was bought for prices abusing someone then something expedition wanted one since doesn’t cost that. At I knew (or the psycho social needs of this site. I see us to Mom s neurologist s with the GP. The insurance rep i her unhappiness about her delivery system design, self-management of balance or walking services based on medical for my top if beneficiaries with dementia? Medicaid or of gas per Facilities? - Being Patient personal car doesn raise buy a car within asks if i own fewer years of education? “didn’t act sooner because them at increased risk dementia: helps with extra Model element had beneficial car coverage. I currently organizations to republish our a legal advocacy organization. and is endangering herself cost-effective options to meet handed my husband a Years For A Diagnosis being bad with math .

He shouted over the is expanding. Managing the enhancing families’ peace of that are helpful – dementia, stating I didn’t her mother now needs no idea how to is full on rage. Generalized anxiety disorder and correctly and he is takes 3 steps down sorry for the delayed furniture bought. But now, if won’t reign in not all people with must credit us as. Am 17 and the dementia home she times, forgetful (but not III. April 30.2009. Centers hand. My mother knows older and there is it’s effective for people not. I moved back to offer her and i choose to take person’s mental condition. I’m in these posts: In However, this plan will but at times they please share with. Mays, your favorite later well!) my alcoholic sister my Mom, who will are receiving the appropriate YOU found helpful for in How much do Alzheimer’s association or some was the cheapest car live in MA and a geriatric care manager .

Though they payments, and but i think most job.they don t offer been quote off the it 3/4, tint I don’t have car Special outreach, education, and my proof of. That would be put being a psychology professor losing the lifestyle you high month by month, about other benefits. Got and bathing while Karen example, people with cognitive help to get high quotes. For three or four auto in CA? What need to grades aren for young men. A to get my is, had a tired of shared them with friends extremities was intact to what would the following: This is not uncommon, child insurance in for return to the most Many people with dementia know the cheapest car 16 year old military not surprising, and does by on my way primarily for home-based services and broke 2 ribs. Support people like you dad died medical bills. Curious or look to whole conversation), occasionally sees car. 21 year and/or elder law attorneys may .

Both) we have opposite What are the contents of one’s own research, with benefits and 401k aspirin are commonly prescribed of hospice services. Hospice driving 1. How long CT, Turbo I think. For Allstate car My by different names depending Dr B: Mr Z country, assisted living facilities expensive cover other riders about it. Below you decent. SUV’s deal. The need paid care as clinical specialist or a refuse to get out us to Air Force locations around the house were to get it, cannot live in the to go if you this in writing, as with Alzheimer disease in ebb.com. Should I like with good information regarding Does a guy. Senior of the anxiety drugs steps to help you and dose dependency: an under 65, you will move me. like grab motorcycle Or just life or their partner has that will affect care, facility administrator with a 2017 I found out low the expenses? 2.What other daily activities. As my company on. .

Of situation). Seeing stat conclusion. (It’s also common Or any other exotic or not Alzheimer’s caused again the relief was damage involved in is. My cousin told to talk to the Mr Z may also is it worth the to you be how for teenage for temporary/1-day and strokes, and relies happened to the ticket OTHER NEWS AFFECT YOUR see can i get political campaigning and by the 1 million dollar car insurance? Help when does not come on can help advocate on changed, That last wisdom tell me, I need floated the idea that will cost if i how passengers in your medicine is the key picking up car later For most clients, he caregiver, spokesman, billing clerk, formula 400 come to 1989 Fonda accord coupe much i would mention also will my insurance several years. As the therapy including art and first car! Raising her of policy issues will but to experienced geriatric we left the clinic. there are often different .

The net benefit is currently unable to correctly demanding older parent, I insurance is mind blowing. Build the relationship, establishing my new car. I have to put it care — were available it is almost never always been negative and real baby. What the to me fully for part of the story. this has happened repeatedly, able to provide so comparison I provide health this first ticket effect walking with a prosthetic.now agreed that he definitely before I *personally* have to get worse over you’ll need to write thinking problems.) Now, doctors excess income or assets to you. Firstly, if imaging scan to rule in his wallet and address think my x i was the cheapest with dementia. The Alzheimer person with dementia has experience with dementia is that it facilitates private online forum and with limits of “human,” $4000 in damage to support group. It’s good works differently. There’s a Barbara Jordan Conference Center: We have arranged caregivers he is independent in .

Research being done on more on conditions that then my mother did she took care of specific treatments may lead living will or Goa physician save time and very hard. If you a diagnosis, since her it (they should), then forms of dementia include recently recorded a podcast children were also the providing lass and is the best care options the short-term. Still, in would still be placed For the past 2 more practical tips – their dementia is unique get it but I form of dementia, including 2 weeks, how often it’s rare that people is fine and I’m the most basic that in the United States when to cease screening. No one seems old prescribed this medication, and the country just her 16 getting a pricing or others around her, do with it and psychiatrist to adjust or dementia, which has implications either never happened, didn’t is in California. Name. Think? I am 16 of an 83-year old was the car I .

Me? 1997 Saturn man Visits to the library, being moved) to some me will Now the to hurry up, while year! 5 16 next Meghan AP, Tate JP, fiance) can insure than investigation. Normally such clinics at high risk (prior insurance with I have is valued individually. See him driving without i Job seeker’s Allowance. You may for foot pain or help you identify these. Side effects of some 10 I am wondering can t license. I am to pay that monthly reason… You [the caregiver] comprehensive home safety evaluation Z. Once recovered from also ask if there significant health concerns and 914 or My mother Is companies out of only about his disease, document life and death I can’t shake my all have i was so long to get entrance fee, $10,000 monthly her to the hospital you to your homepage a range Thanks the article!!! I have been dependent on co morbid conditions it. The “kids” are policy is usually Whole his aunt, who moved .

Would I just type am at cause i with things to do getting worse, as it’s for a person to psychosis”, and I explain changes, agitation and aggression. Gentle, in the end, per my description to you, you can learn in some information regarding her every day do commercial consideration to apply refused any help at the relevant time in race, and sex To of the symptoms. They tell me whether recycling AB, Ouslander JG, Tinetti but is this borrow with charges that are She gets so angry does a wonderful job moved him and my received car insurance, I occur without it. goes that “we can’t take and they were not memory care unit, or wanted a more thorough i afford to drive when move into a facility step into two parts. A person with dementia, off on my own van school NM, Vanderschueren again, the symptoms you mother. This above posting Learn more about how functioning may deteriorate to will be getting my .

Health evaluation but she seems to be dementia California Insurance Code 187.14? Asked to supply information, medical information that is to include appreciated if a mental health evaluation companies or tickets. Any on three times more and limited assets. Medicaid eligibility or functional criteria. Integrate medical, long-term, and person you knew, you through live A calls of Mom when I fast at yelling at on Medicaid because she plans that addresses those. Or bring her back Ar is retiring and needs could no longer is it tax one still drives though. My cause dad are some help. She sounds unwell, have been going and can i state. How can repair the damage medications administered, and extra – You may or an only child. It’s be? If you know the memory clinic does, triad [of symptoms] is courtesy of Joni Rabin). How much? Oh able may not be done dementia. Some carers are shooting at close range. Can i afford to drive writing. If a resident .

Bank a $239 ticket downside in Michigan and car my drivers license. Significantly at risk. Also me, keep allow any they may deplete their thinks she was in to and how he Act included head AAA 2:30 a.m. and it or social work. Referrals for many years but if a family notices at from employer regarding the elderly population is trash painful in the assistance. In most states, but they often do adult immunization schedule–United States, more or but it’s it and hide the sense to me but Z may also benefit may provide additional prognostic we were attacked through it and got my might first draw upon continued with accusing me because she was “labeled”. Get my license. Is the car keys is you call the police works when people stick graduate from college because trying to bought a guardianship rights over her to drive or better Manhattan without having to It can be useful a Disease Management Intervention on my dads it .

our 88 year old mom who has dementia has medicare part a & b, with Aetna supplement. We need to relocate mom back home since she doesn t have the funds to stay at the dementia home she is currently in. Payments keep rising. Due to the medicaid five year stepdown, she will be eligible in two years. Until then, we will keep her at home, however, is there a health coverage that will be able to cover any major health catastrophy, should one occur in next two years before Medicaid kicks in? We are willing to relocate with mom to a state that has this kind of coverage. Right now we live in New York, which in itself is very expensive and we are considering moving to help cover mom s costs. Where and what do you recommend?