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kita-shinsuke-whore · 2 years

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I saw a glimpse of Us, Angel of Light.

TW: Angst, Heartbreak.

You knew. You knew you're just a rebound for his ex girlfriend. You just still want to be with him although you know he just trying to date you to pass all the times. He doesn't know that you knew.

If only you know that he does feel guilty, maybe you could appreciate. But he doesn't. You're may be in his sight but not his mind. She is still in his mind and she managed to take it all over. You would cry out every night since you've been keeping everything up to yourself. His friends pity you and they try to break both of you apart but seeing both of you having the weird relationship, when you love someone that is still in love with someone else's. He watched how his ex girlfriend met new guy and dated him. She even kissed her new boyfriend infront of him.

Then, he would went to your house and kissed you. You thought it's just him being clingy and lovely boyfriend. But he's just trying to get away. He imagined you were her. But nothing changed. You are way too perfect than her, you treat him right, you spend most of your attention, love and time on him. Yet, he sees her in yourself.

Oh, pity you.

When both of you arguing and you tried to leave, he begged you to stay. You told him that you hate to be a rebound. You feel sorry for him to lose his first love but you will never be her. He wished you to stay now. Everyday, he will go to his favourite spot to watch the sunset that he visited with you when both of you were still dating, you actually mesmerized him. The way the sunlight is beaming on your skin like gold glitters. You did have a place in his mind but he just used you to move on, remember? He called you as his angel of light when both of you were enjoying the golden hour. He finally fell for you in the end of the story and he tried to apologize when you knew about it. But something slipped out from his lips that made your heart fell into pieces.

"I love you, Suzuha (the ex name)", he confessed.

"I love you too, Sakusa", you slowly sobbed infront of him. You lose your final streak to love him.

#haikyuu angst #haikyuu pov #sakusa angst #haikyuu x reader #sakusa x you

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hinata-boke · 3 months

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stuff of nightmares

#haikyuu #NEW CONTENT IN 2024?????#kenma #nishinoya #daichi #i really liked how it was kais pov bc he wasnt super focused on in the main story #very cute i missed them #my art #doodle

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akiisks · 4 months

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Mornings

#what if my atsumu post was in his pov #who knows #hq #haikyuu #haikyuu fanart #sakusa kiyoomi #msby sakusa #fanart

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ac3ifix · 2 months

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Tsukishima headcanons!!

FTM AND BOTTOM MALE READER

(staring off strong with a haikyuu fic!!)

* He lovesss thighs. grabbing? sure! groping? sure! kissing/biting? absolutely! he adores them.

* (Ftm) He will always check in on you to make sure youve taken binder breaks, he likes to place his hand on your chest and make sure your breathing it normal

* He will def make fun of your height

* (Ftm) If you’re on the team he will definitely make sure youre wearing trans tape and not a binder during your games

* He loveess to edge you, he wont let you cum until youre crying, begging, and PLEADING with him to let you.

* Definitely has a safe word with you

* Sometimes he’ll just shove a vibrator into you and let you moan and cry during a car ride or something

* Loves when you sit on his lap

* Loves to let you grind against his thigh

THATS BASICALLY IT!! LMK IF YOU WANT ME TO ADD MORE <33

#male reader #x ftm reader #ftm reader #x male reader #smut #haikyuu #haikyuu headcanons #tsukishima kei #tsukishima x reader #tsukishima x you #tsukishimaxmalereader #haikyu x reader #haikyu smut #second person pov

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sugawara--san · 3 months

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LITERALLY CRYING NOT KENMA GETTING EXHAUSTED THINKING AB HIS OWN FAKE SCENARIO

#overthinking king #also j so cute that he knows karasuno is gonna BE there #i did not expect this chapter to be them but that's so cute 😭#kai pov mwah #haikyuu!!#kai nobuyuki's nightmare #nekoma #beloved cats #kai nobuyuki #kozume kenma #kuroo tetsurou #yaku morisuke #fukunaga shouhei #haiba lev #yamamoto taketora #nekoma high

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stroobae · 3 months

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yall fuck with tiktoks or what

#my art #haikyuu!!#hq #miya atsumu #hinata shouyou #sakusa kiyoomi #sakuatsu #skats #atsuhina #pov i cant decide between sakuatsu and astuhina so i chose both #they both know from experience this is man is NOT straight

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lele-11 · 7 months

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ME: yall I love Suna Rintarou and stuff but like. Finding fanfics of him is sooo hard. Like, BRO I DO NOT WANT A SUNA STORY IN WHICH HES A DRUG ADDICT. I srsly believe he likes edgy aesthetic but HE IS NOT A DRUG ADDICT. like why can’t there just be something a bit more wholesome 😭

ALSO ME: *currently writing a depressing Suna fanfic that is the opposite of ‘wholesome’*

(But srsly. Yall need to make Suna stories that makes him NOT a drug addict or something)

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novakrouge · 1 year

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Pov you're laying on Osamu's lap

#osamu #osamu miya #haikyuu #haikyuu!!#haikyu x reader #haikyū!!#miya #pov

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strawberrycheeks-and-glasses · 10 months

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The One Thing Tsukishima Can’t Do

Rated: E (18+)

WC: 8.7k~

Tsukishima x reader

Summary:

The one thing that Tsukishima can’t do…is feelings.

Tsukishima and Hinata work a coffee shop that you started to frequent and Tsukishima can’t understand why you make him feel the way he feels.

~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~

Tags: Pining!Tsuki, Tsukishima is bad at feelings, first time, POV: Tsukishima

I stg Spotify knows I’m a tsukki simp

Fic brought to you by the song UWU by Chevy

Please listen to it, it is exactly what Tsukki would say if he had a crush on you pls

#tsukishima x reader #tsukishima smut #tsukishima kei #haikyu smut #haikyuu x reader #haikyuu fanfiction #haikyuu tsukishima #tsukishima x y/n #tsukishima scenarios #hq tsukishima #hq #Haikyuu #haikyuu!!#my fic #pining #Tsukishima is bad at feelings #pov Tsukishima

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touchlikethesun · 3 months

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i’m sorry it’s cute and all, but kageyama “why tf should japanese people speak english we live in japan” tobio is not speaking italian with his japanese bf unless it’s absolutely necessary. like i can buy hinata getting a kick out of using his portuguese/english with kageyama from time to time (like pet names etc) but kags, even tho he might learn english and italian well enough to communicate on the court and with the press, isn’t going to have any desire to speak foreign languages (something he’s uncomfortable with) w/in the comfort of his own home, and that’s okay. personally i think it’s even sweeter if tobio is relieved to call hinata while they’re abroad so he can just speak japanese without thinking too hard.

#some people like foreign languages and some people don’t and that’s fine as long as you’re not a dick about it #i just think it’s wildly out of character for kags to call hinata caro or amore when from his pov there are perfectly suited japanese words #and this is not me projecting AT ALL if you know me you know i am the king of codeswitching to the point it’s probably annoying #but kags is not me he just would not do this full stop idk what else to say #kageyama tobio #kagehina #hinata shouyou #haikyuu #post timeskip

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kita-shinsuke-whore · 2 years

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A MISERABLE CHRISTMAS

TW: Fluff.

A month after New Year has passed.

A new year is finally here and you are now back single after breaking up with Ushijima last two months ago. It's hurt. It really does but you tried to focus on yourself. You take care of your skincare, you started to try on new dresses and styles, you tried to hang out with people from other schools and of course, you met new people after transferring to new class.

You managed to block all the toxicity from your life but somehow you feel miserable after what you have said that to Tendou.

Ushijima had two months of cheating with someone else's and the one that broke the truth to you was your own junior. You're in your second year of highschool now and you tried to turn into a new leaf.

As you're going down the stairs to the cafeteria, someone's accidentally bumped their shoulder into yours.

"Oh, sorry!!", he said. He didn't said much but he flashed his smile...a very warm and nice smile that makes you feel so comfortable. He turned around at you to see if you're okay and you took a glance at his nametag.

Semi Eita.

He has white hairs, pretty eyes and the most obvious one...his warm personality.

"It's fine", you said to him. You walked down the stairs again and you bought yourself a sandwich and a strawberry milk. As you're about to take out your phone from your pocket, you realise...nothing is inside your pocket. You got panicked and ran to your class as soon as possible.

When you're going upstairs to go to your class, you saw Tendou is talking to Ushijima. You walked away faster because you just hated to face them now. Finally reaching the class door, you saw Semi guy is standing infront of your class while calling your name.

"Is there Y/N L/N here??", he said. But no one is answering him. "I think she went out. To the toilet i guess?", one of your classmates said to him. He nodded his head and when he turned around, both of you made an eye contact. He didn't break them and so do you.

"I'm...Y/N", you told him. He walked up to you and smiled again. "You dropped your phone. I guess it slipped out from your pocket.", he grins as he handing out your item to you. You bowed and thanked him. You realise he might be your crush now...

When he is about to walk away, you grabbed his hand and called his name. "Wait, Semi!", you said.

"Ehh, yes??", he looked at you confusedly. "Can...Wait, may I know which class you're from? And are you free this evening?", you asked him.

"Oh, that's all you wanted to know? Well, I'm from Second Year and the Fourth Class and yes, I am free this evening", he replied to you.

"Can we go to the nearest cafe around here? I wanted to show my gratitude to you", you said. He smiled again and patted your head. "I would loved to!", he said. He seriously make you feel so fluffy.

That evening, both of you went out to the nearest Starbucks and you paid for his drink. "Thank you for paying my drink.", he said. "No worries, I'm happy. But...how do you know it's my phone that you're holding to?", you asked him.

"Your keychain has your name craved on it... It's basically Y/N L/N", Semi said again. "Wait, which club are you from? Calligraphy isnt it?", he suddenly get interested in you. "Yea...I am. How about you?", you asked him. "I'm basically in a volleyball team. You know right our school has like the best volleyball team?", Semi said. He laughed proudly after saying that. Well, it's a fact.

"Oh wow. A volleyball player... That's great!", you said. It's not so great. Oh, why do you have to get stucked with every volleyball player like, what is your fate with them?

Weeks passed by and you're getting closer with Semi. Ushijima does realized what happened between both of you. Rumours about his new girlfriend cheated on him spreaded all over the school too. Some said she dated him for popularity. Some said just for satisfaction.

Once Ushijima broke up with his new girlfriend, he tried to contact you back but you have moved on and not going back to him.

You knew how much your feelings are growing back because of this Semi Eita guy. He is so mesmerising and makes you fell from him just by looking at his smile.

You two get to know eachother until April. That's when the spring season started and so do you two. Ushijima regretted the fact he cheated on you. You moved on, you're doing well, you trusted yourself and you give someone else's a chance to get into your heart.

Timeskip.

Ushijima watched how you walked on the aisle in your wedding dress that makes you looked way too alluring and gorgeous. Your father put your hand into Semi's and he walked away. Semi holds your hand tight. Then, the wedding ceremony started with the vow session.

Once the vow session ended, the priest asked Semi as the groom to kiss you. Semi wrapped his arm around your waist and pulled you closer to him. He then slowly kissed you passionately infront of the guests and everyone clapped their hands. Ushijima closed his eyes to shut down the feelings of jealousy from watching your lovely day. Semi is a great guy. He is loyal and stay with you since 17 till the age of 25. 8 years of waiting worth it.

The wedding that happened on Christmas day.

You married your own soulmate.

#semi eita #haikyuu angst #haikyuu x reader #haikyuu pov #ushijima angst #tendou angst #haikyuu oneshot #Spotify

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kitas-cleaning-supplies · 3 months

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making sakuatsu a special breed of assholes in love in my bokuto fic. btw

#psst bokuto fic is up. you can find it through my fic masterlist in my pinned. it's called chasing unwritten lines !!#no bc they are so dumb here. pls communicate i am begging #this isn't angsty or anything #i just need them to not talk abt their feelings as a plot device cause i don't wanna write from the others' pov #haikyuu #miya atsumu #sakusa kiyoomi #sakuatsu #writing #maz rambles

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yugiohz · 4 months

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speaking of people's wrong opinions on art i love haikyuu's art development and its current style idc what ppl say about it

#not every mangaka needs to draw their characters like models sometimes they need to look a bit silly and match the overall tone #idk its sad that so many fans ignore how good furudate's shape language is like his stylization rlly pushed those formssssss ugh #also the faces got more variation it is so easy to tell hq characters apart even though hq rarely uses screen tones like its just bw #i also love how furudate draws old people he is so good at captivating the charm fo all ages ranges its sooooooo #i remember a few years ago i saw ppl complain about kuroo oikawa etc not being Pretty BOys anymore like i guess ut also it makes sm sense t #me #HQ is from HINATAS pov and i think characters like oikawa and kuroo looking goofier and less handsome/intimidating only highlights that the #become hinatas friends like theyre not these imposing seniors anymore those are his friends #i also like that they look and act their age i love that everone is pulling weird faces all the time #hq's visual comedy is just good in general esp with hinata and kageyama oughhhhh #haikyuu! art is great i think it plays such a big role in why its so beloved #even if not everyone likes it

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iwaoiness · 4 months

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Crushed bangs

Takeru's leaning out the window of Tooru's room, balancing lightly on his knees propped up on the blue-colored pouf that matches the curtains. He has both arms crossed over the window frame, one of his hands holding the carton of apple and grape juice that he continues to sip lazily. His curious eyes watch somewhat interest at the black specks flying over the orange sky that covers all of Miyagi on that warm Saturday of July, gliding in front of elongated clouds that look like jagged strokes of paint.

The chirping of those same birds can be heard, as well as the sound of quiet traffic a few meters from the Oikawa residence, the barking of a stray dog, the rash rash of Minamoto-san's broom who always sweeps the entrance to her store at this hour before closing.

The kid is about to get up, go back inside the room and steal some of the knick-knacks that Tooru hides inside an old volleyball when the familiar sound of a motorbike makes him stand up immediately. His eyes drop down to the road in time to catch a Yamaha YZF stopping in front of the Iwaizumi house, ahead of the Oikawa residence itself.

When he recognizes Hajime's figure on the motorbike (and deliberately ignores the second figure) Takeru's eyes sparkle like stars and his smile spreads from ear to ear.

"It's Hajime-san!" He exclaims to himself, almost vibrating in place.

The motorbike’s engine shuts off and Takeru takes a deep breath to shout out the name of his favorite uncle, as the second figure gets off the vehicle and Hajime's full attention turns to him.

The little kiddo blinks, more curious now, crouches down almost out of inertia, sinking a little between his shoulders and holding the frame this time with his little hands after setting his juice aside. Tooru's voice reverberates down the road (all, to no one's surprise, are complaints about how useless the helmets are and what an assault on the integrity of his hair they are and that he's sick of his bangs losing volume). Takeru rolls his eyes (and tries to deny that the drama really runs through his veins as well), but looks up again when Hajime's low chuckle slips in between his complaints.

Iwaizumi's still on his motorbike, his solid legs planted on either side of the vehicle and his thick arms resting on the handlebars. The helmet rests in front of him, just above the gas tank. And his head is tilted, watching Oikawa. Even from a distance, Takeru can see the tender smile plastered on his lips despite the fact that he's teasing his uncle ("but isn't this the natural state of your bangs?") and how his gaze's filled with something Takeru's also seen in his dad's eyes toward his mom and grandma's towards grandpa.

There is more teasing and more laughter and indignant squawks from his uncle. Also light touches like one hand slapping the other, a gentle nudge on a shoulder, a kick on a shin. And also fingers that intertwine and caress and join and untwines.

It's not the first time (in fact, he lost count months ago) that Takeru has seen his uncles being affectionate because ever since they started dating a year ago (and seven months, Takeru-chin!, he's reminded by his uncle's silly voice), Tooru has become much more clingy (if that was even possible) with Iwa-chan and never misses a chance to cling to him in a thousand different ways.

This time, however, it's all sort of more intimate and nothing to do with Oikawa teasingly biting Iwaizumi's nose before he smacks his head and scolds him. The teasing dies down and is now soft whispers and shy giggles. Takeru really feels like he is interrupting and invading their privacy and is about to leave; but his uncle leans over to Hajime and kisses him.

The boy stifles a scream and quickly lowers his head, resting his forehead on his palms as he feels his cheeks heat up.

He gives himself a few seconds to calm down and, praying that they don't prolong their kiss like in the PG movies, slowly raises his eyes, peering over the window frame as if he were a kitten.

Fortunately, they have stopped kissing and Oikawa is crossing now the street to the house. Takeru blinks towards Iwaizumi, now standing next to the motorbike, slowly stowing his helmet in the saddle, eyes solely on Tooru, the same crooked smile on his lips.

"Hey, Tooru!" Hajime speaks loudly from the other sidewalk and Takeru sees his uncle turn around. "Remember that I love you even with your bangs crushed!"

And Oikawa laughs, bright and happy, and his voice sounds giggly, natural and totally in love.

"I know, Hajime-chan! I love you even when your feets smell!"

Iwaizumi's laughter reverberates as well and there is an affectionate fuck you between guffaws.

Tooru resumes walking, almost trotting with his helmet in his hands. Takeru hears the front door opening, a loud "Tadaima!" and the closing of the door. But he continues to look with some curiosity at Hajime, who after making sure that Oikawa really does enter the house, finally moves, dragging his motorbike towards the garage of his home.

"Takeru!" The boy jumps in place and quickly turns his head back, meeting his uncle down the doorway, his helmet now under his arm, one hand on his hip and his eyes narrowed down his furrowed brow. "How many times have I told you not to come into my room when I'm not around? And what are you doing leaning out the window, you might fall out!"

Takeru watches him carefully as he continues to scold him, approaching his bookshelf and standing on tiptoe to stow the helmet on the top shelf.

"And even if it's the second floor, you know there's mom's geraniums and lavender just below and she'll not only kill you if you survive the fall but me too!"

The little boy finally settles into the pouff, sinking into the seat.

"Uncle Tooru"

"What?"

"Does Hajime-san really love you even with crushed bangs?"

And that causes Oikawa to trip over his own feet as he approaches his wardrobe, barely managing to keep his balance (and pride) before turning to his nephew, eyes wide and cheeks fully aflame.

"W-What?! D-Did y-?! W-Were you listening?!"

Takeru shrugs, grinning.

"You guys are loud."

Oikawa looks at him for a few more seconds with his mouth wide open and Takeru widens his smile, crossing his arms. Tooru tries to say something but he ends up taking a deep breath and:

"M-Mom! Takeru is bothering me again!"

"That's a lie, oba-chan! I'm doing nothing!"

...

inspired by this tweet in spanish pa mi gente hispana

u can find me on my ao3

🍉

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blucassiopeia · 8 months

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i really love your Dangerous piece! that i started stalking you and your works. but can i request a piece about the song Rewrite the Stars like how you did to Vanilla Twilight?

i won't mind if it's connected to your fic/s or anything. ☺

🤩 love this! i have just the right plot!

warnings: angst angst angst, cheating, complicated Osamu, mentions of suicide and deaths, pining, may be boring for you butー🙈

wc: 1.6k

Ω.

"cake?"

you nodded at your husband as he reached out for that layer of cake at the middle of the round reception table. you don't think you can keep it down tho. your head's swimming right now, eyes unfocused and glossy. glad Atsumu's not talking about it, if ever he had noticed.

at the swarm of guests in the reception, your sight seemed to make a beeline to someone you never expected to marry. and he's staring back at you with wide wary eyes.

the whole scene was unexpected, the past week was full of bombs you never anticipated, he never anticipated. a shotgun wedding because of some overly reserved culture, a wedding to mask the shame he did infront of the bride's parents not even less a month ago.

you sighed, resigned at the ridiculous fate of your husband's twin and readily averted your gaze from him, already smiling at Atsumu and his new plate of cake.

"thanks, love."

four months passed by like a fork scraping on metal and one morning you found yourself naked and blanketed and alone on Osamu's marital bed. your head is throbbing so hard, breath labored as panic washed over you. within minutes, you were ready to leave their household. Atsumu and Osamu's wife are all you could think of at the moment.

then you saw her, carrying a supposed to be breakfast in bed, and awkwardly smiling at you.

"hi. you're up already. Osamu's just taking a bath." she squeaked.

your eyes glossed at the unexpected encounter with her, panic reaching to your brim. how could she be soー

"she won't tell Atsumu."

Osamu's arms wrapped around your hips, his chest flushed on your back as he softly gave your shoulder kisses. in front of his wife. you saw how she forlornly smiled as her eyes were glued on Osamu's arms around you.

"breakfast before she go, 'SaーOsamu."

"of course."

"no. i'm going home. thank you."

you forcefully squirmed away Osamu and stomped through their door, so sudden that he took a minute to process and he's out of their apartment on your heels, leaving his wife clutching her chest unbeknownst to both of you.

"let's stop this, 'Samu. please." you begged Osamu two nights after that incident with his wife.

"don't you love me anymore?"

oh god, i still do. i do.

"i don't."

"you were mine first."

"but he's my husband now. he's the one that i love now. and he's your twin, for god's sake Osamu. are you really out of your mind? can't you not see your wife hurting because of yourー"

"no. i'm not letting you go."

but to Osamu's horror, you snipped out all means of communications with him. it was hard because how it'll be possible if Atsumu and Osamu are on the same circle, on the same family. but you tried your hardest. and you have seen him getting restless.

and his wife giving you pleading glances.

why is she pleading you to cheat with her husband? when clearly, she's fucking hurting. she has consented, but you can't stomach it. Atsumu and she deserves so much better partners. and you'll be that better one for Atsumu. even if it'll kill you.

then came a day that all of that went 180°. Atsumu started to notice how Osamu and his longing gazes rest on you and your husband would linger his eyes on you on nights, full of question.

his question came past one night, "do you somehow want me to break this relationship up?"

to your horror, eyes wide, you sat up and took a good look at him before you whispered, "no. no Atsumu. why would you ask that?" you cupped his cheeks now wet with his rolling tears. it broke your heart to a certain degree. "why would you ask that?"

you came in terms with him after that night, but his relationship with his brother got dented. you blamed yourself as your attention was on Osamu and how he's treating his wife. he's getting worse everyday. how can he do that to her? is he really like that?

no. he's not like that. he's just like that because she's not you. Osamu's blaming her for everything bad happening to him, from his family to you.

god, what an asshole. and to think you love that asshole.

"you love Atsumu, huh?"

"with all my heart, Osamu. with all of my heart. so please."

"okay."

that sneaky afternoon, he walked out from you for the first time, and you let him. you have to let him.

that was hours before something horrifying happened.

his wife died, and she was pregnant. his wife died without him by her side. his wife died, never knowing how Osamu cried for her, how he's realizing he loves her.

"i regretted ever blinding myself because of my love for you that i didn't notice her. i regretted ever loving you. because of you, i lost them."

you smiled at him, Atsumu not far and listening, letting you take the wheel.

"no Osamu. you lost them because you were selfish and indifferent. keep that in mind."

and his words burned you and it'll always will, for times to come.

he was avoiding you for all the time you've been with his brother. does he remember? what was happening anyway? why's everything happening again?

no. not happening again.

so, you also avoided him with all your might.

acted like magnets with the same polar properties, repelling.

and you can't help but to watch him ruin everything for both him and his ex-wife, roping her new husband in the process.

you heard him muttered under his breath his apologies and his newfound motivation. and it broke you, because it's all for someone that's not you. and this is fine. this is fine.

ii.

it's different now.

he'sー

invigorated. to give his ex-wife the happiness she deserves. all along. and he'll continue to give her everything. until he's exhausted.

and he'll never be. you know it deep in your bones.

the way he looks at her while pretending to be her bestfriend? it's different from the way he looks at you.

so you close your eyes. you don't have to be a masochist.

iii.

how long has it been from when he last talked to you like how he did so long ago?

you can feel Atsumu's arms on your waist, his slow breathing as he slumbers. but your mind's not there. it's on some apartment far downtown, with Osamu crying because he can't bottle up his emotions anymore. his ex-wife is getting married again to her soulmate.

your heart wants to hug him, but it's not right. and he doesn't want you there.

i regretted ever loving you.

you swallowed hard.

iv.

again.

close your eyes.

yn be strong. you can get through this.

it's going to be okay.

he'll be okay.

focus on Atsumu.

vi.

you have seen him so devastated when his ex-wife committed suicide after the freakest incident these cycles had offered Osamu.

and you lost Atsumu, too.

you wanna run to him. but it's not too easy.

it'll waste everything he had worked for. for the love of his life.

six cycles ago, that was you.

when will this end?

vii.

something's different with him. he's.. hitting on you. and you hoped it was it.

but no.

he's trying to change the situations. trying new paths to get a new ending. but you're close to breaking.

"stop what you're doing, Osamu."

he was.. fuck. damn you, Osamu.

"not doing anything like that."

for over seven cycles, he's at it again. is he not afraid?

but there it was. even if it's just a glimmer, there's something else in his eyes. but Atsumu.. you can't sacrifice Atsumu.

you're afraid that he's just doing this for his love. and not for you.

of course. it's not for you. he has someone else now. and he's going through and against space and time to give everything to her. you're.. jealous. but she deserves all of it.

so close your eyes again, yn.

viii.

but when he tried his chance again on you, so early down the line, you gave in. but you didn't expect much. he's still inlove with her. he'll forever be. you smiled bitterly as you rode his train.

"i love you."

you teared up at how he said it, so sincere and believable. and you wanna believe him. you badly want to believe him. coz this was all you ever wanted. all you ever dreamt of, happening in front of your eyes.

"i love you too, 'Samu."

"i'm yours."

you laughed lightly. how could he say that? after this cycle, he'll have his happy ending with his forever love. after this, he'll come back to her like you never happened. and you'll go back to Atsumu, just like before. you just aren't meant to be, in any of these cycles. eventhough you longed for him for so long.

he maybe thought you were already asleep in his chest. he maybe thought that you'll never hear.

"i'm giving up on her. i'll take responsibility now. i have roped all of you to these crazy cycles and i'm sorry. i'm sorry for being selfish, yn. i pray there wont be any other cycle. i pray this would be the last. i'm done seeing you longing for me. i'm so sorry. i love you."

but you're not giving up on his happiness too.

so you wished for him instead.

α.

because this is what is supposed to be.

that only cycle is enough for you to survive. everything will keep you and Osamu apart anyway so you'll treasure that previous cycle with all of your heart. where you were on edge, but you're happy. because you are with him.

now, you just have to drink to the fact that it's not Osamu, in any universe. and you'll forever suffer from it, for as long as you'll remember.

and he'll never know.

"i love you, Osamu. be happy now."

you whispered infront of the shrine that started it all.

cassie 2023.

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