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redgoldblue · 4 months

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Fic Writing Review 2023 🌈

tagged by @itwoodbeprefect - i have also been thinking about this so thank you for taking the initiative!

tagging @faorism @gallantrejoinder if you'd care to do this in any form (including as writing/art review)!

Words and Fics (on ao3) 📚

words posted: 52,220, apparently. Which is actually... basically last year's but minus 10k because I didn't do H50 Big Bang this year, because med school. most things in my life now can be stated as 'because med school'. (actually I just realised I didn't do it last year either, but that was because I was already finishing a 10k H50 fic. so my point stands)

fics posted: either 6 or 29, depending on whether one counts the advent calendar as one fic or 24. plus 3 posted only on Tumblr.

first fic: love don't treat you like that (babe, I'm letting you know) (H50). on the NINTH of january, apparently. i've already lost my first-fic-of-the-year contest to last year, unless i unexpectedly finish something today.

last fic: Advent Calendar 2023 / ...Zaph Kilkane, the pre-eminent climate scientist of the 22nd century...

Ships and Fandoms ⚓

would you believe I literally did not repeat a fandom this year, outside of the advent calendar. and this year's AC had the most fandoms since 2019.

Hawaii Five-0 (McDanno)

NCIS: LA (Sallen)

Starsky & Hutch (S/H)

House MD (Hilson)

MASH (Punnihawk)

and then AC-only ones:

Star Trek (Spirk)

The Man From UNCLE (Napollya)

911 (Buddie)

Due South (i don't know ship names. are there ship names? Fraser/RayK)

Good Omens (Azcrow)

Leverage (thiefsome)

Almost Paradise (Ernesto/Alex. alesto. i'm coining it)

Top 5 Fics by Kudos 🏆

I mean, I have 6 posted fics that can be kudosed separately.

love don't treat you like that (babe, I'm letting you know) (H50)

When You're Loving Me (That's When I'm Loving You) (NCIS: LA)

Advent Calendar 2023 (see above. nine fandoms)

my powers of expression and thoughts so sublime / could never do you justice in reason or rhyme (House MD)

Finding A Cure In You (S&H)

Top 5 Favorite Fics 💖

okay, I'm going to count distinct chapters of the advent calendar for this. in no particular order and subject to mood change:

When You're Loving Me (That's When I'm Loving You) (NCIS: LA) - I cited this as a contender for my favourite fic I've written a couple months ago, so obviously it has to go in the year's. what can i say, fake dating is an immaculate trope, and this also all came onto the page very easily which is always vaguely miraculous.

there you go pulling me right back in (H50) - sometimes vague prompts i've had down for ages write up as something that's. fine, but a bit clunky, and I just have to move on bc it's the advent calendar and a new fic each day. sometimes I start writing them and they spring into life with joyous delight. or in this case, uninhibited grumpiness and love.

singing yesterday's songs wishing i could be with you tonight (MASH) - the one that didn't make it into the top 5 kudosed, I assume partially due to being locked and partially due to being a serious tone, not terribly shippy, and Peg POV. But I've had some version or other of it for a long time, it's one of those stories I'm genuinely proud of, and I was glad to finally post it.

Totally Normal (Due South) - it's fun. it was fun. I was slightly nervous about it, because the only prior Due South thing I'd written was Dief POV and this was Fraser and RayK POV and the first time writing either of those, but it turns out watching + liveblogging four and two seasons, respectively, of a character in four months is. enough to cement their voices in my head. it was unexpectedly easy and also. fun.

Festive Spice (MUNCLE) - i just think it epitomises the advent calendar. in the words of coolbreezemage, 'yesssss bake cakes and kiss your partner'.

HMs:

Finding A Cure In You (S&H) - this doesn't make it to the above list due to the fact that I haven't actually managed to reread it since I posted it. but just for the amount of time I spent with it, how different it is to my usual M.O. of writing, and the weird way I wrote it (entirely in the notes app, with almost zero rereading while writing), I have to somehow mention it.

A Thousand Words / To Be Spared (Good Omens) - I don't know if they're favourite but I do think they're good. and the format of to be spared was pleasingly experimental and i think it worked.

Fandom Fic Events 🤝

also the Starsky & Hutch SHarecon zine! which the zine still holds copyright on, but will be posted in April.

Projects for 2024 👀

mmm gonna sort this differently and also ramble

Ones that will definitely be finished in 2024 and if they aren't you have free rein to come to my house and tie me to a chair come November: MUNCLE wip, The Unwitting Truth Affair/The Honesty Affair, I haven't actually decided which title yet;

Starsky & Hutch, the still-unnamed Huggy & Pete wip.

Ones I have both hope and some amount of faith will be finished in 2024 and if they aren't you have free rein to come into my inbox and harass me about them: Hawaii Five-0 wip, Much Ado About Something (*salutes squares*);

other Hawaii Five-0 wip, state of disrepair. yes, I'm manifesting state of disrepair 2024. probably november/december 2024, but i'm manifesting it anyway;

Leverage wip, all that I want is a kind heart to haunt

Ones I would like to be finished in 2024, and if my brain decides it likes them might be, but all you have free rein for is to politely ask me about them once per business month: Hawaii Five-0 cath/steve/danny pwp, Wait A Minute Let Me Take You There;

horny S&H wip, Previews Of Your Body Driving Me Insane;

S&H Vanessa coda, so cordial / so rotten (don't ask me);

Good Omens wip, love won't you be as you've always been

Ones I don't expect to finish in 2024 but would like to get some words down in: angsty S&H wip, Relentless As The Rain;

ridiculous undercover H50 wip, Four Seasons of Love;

other ridiculous H50 wip, The Irritating, Annoying, Infuriating, (Effective) Seduction Techniques of One Steven J. McGarrett;

SPN ..wip? depending on the time limit on 'progress'?, Smells Like Turpentine.

vague thoughts: i'd like to write a full-length (for whatever value of that. the AC ones actually were full-length, especially the second one, but what I really mean is AC-independent) due south fic. they're very weird and i enjoyed writing them, and I'd also like to write something with RayV in it. maybe if I successfully inspired @itwoodbeprefect to write new ds, when she does that it will inspire me to write something, and we can set up a ping-pong game. no, wait, that's mixing fandoms.

I expect more MUNCLE fic. this one's already 3.5k and rocketing along, and i'm only two-thirds of the way through season 1. what form that will take i don't know at this stage but we'll see.

....i was discussing the vague concept of house/h50 crossover fic with squares literally yesterday and on the one hand I haven't written a crossover since 2014 and also don't want that to be my legacy, but on the other hand i think there is at least a 50% chance it's going to stick in the back of my brain and keep niggling.

#someone: plays ping-pong. me: nice starsky & hutch reference #mine #my writing #tag games #Hawaii Five 0 #The Man From UNCLE #MASH #Starsky & Hutch #NCIS: LA #i will not tag literally every fandom mentioned here bc that would just be a) mean and b) tiring

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mrs-steve-harrington · 9 months

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Fic authors self rec! When you get this, reply with your favorite five fics that you've written, then pass on to at least five other writers. Let’s spread the self-love ❤

I started working on this days ago, but my tumblr is fucky and wouldn't show me the post in my drafts. So sorry this is so late! I had to recreate it using the second ask that I'd gotten, haha.

Seeing both of these show up in my inbox made me smile so much! Always here for the chance to share my faves. Especially since I feel like they change depending on my mood, haha.

the devil on my shoulder - The Babysitter (2017) [2,740 words]

Summary:

My take on how things could have gone if the cult had needed to manipulate Cole into helping/joining the ritual rather than needing to use his blood. -- Or maybe it's not the scrapes that hurt. Maybe it's the fact that it feels like no matter what he does, he is always going to end up back here. On the ground, bruised and scraped and laughed at by people he's never done anything to.

This one is very much a just-for-me kind of fic (though it was written for a request, so I guess it's for me and that one person who gave me the jumping off point). The fandom had, I think, around 20 or less fics back when I posted it? omg I checked and there were less than 10 fics back then holy crap. And I know very few people who have actually seen either of the movies. But I fell in love with them both and am still so grateful that someone replied to my request for ideas way back when and gave me a reason to write this. It's written in a strange style that I've never replicated, but it's one of the few fics of my own that I go back to reread with semi-regularity.

anything (anything) for you - Stranger Things [5,373 words]

Summary:

Desperate not to lose Nancy, Steve proposes she date him and Jonathan at the same time. He didn't mean for the three of them to date each other. But if that's what it will take for Nancy to be willing to stay with him, he'll figure out how to be okay with it.

This fic was written for @urisarang as part of a fic exchange. Maybe the second AO3 fic exchange I ever did? I remember being so relieved to have been assigned to Uri because they would be perfectly happy for whatever angsty idea I might come up with. And wouldn't be upset if I came up with something of my own rather than working strictly from their prompts at the time. I got the idea for this while writing MY OWN prompts for whoever was assigned to me and realizing,actually, I needed to write it myself as well. Since this one there's only been one other fic that I've ever seen with a similar premise (shout out to @stevethehousewife's amazing fic Do I Mean Anything?), but I remember it being fairly popular in other fandoms and oh man. It's just. One of my favorite flavors of angst. idk, I love this fic and someday I will finish the sequel that's over 15k words long already and nowhere near done

Sleeves - Free Guy [1,684 words]

Summary:

Antwan helps roll up the sleeves of the new shirt he bought for Keys, and convinces him to let something go in the process.

Another fic that's mostly "for me", though written knowing that Uri would probably enjoy it as well. It's so wild, but like. I had only written 2 Free Guy fics at the time and was sure that was all I had in me. I would never write another one again. Then while getting ready to go to a memorial service, I was rolling up my sleeves and was hit with the image of Antwan rolling up Keys' sleeves for him and yeah. Turns out wrists are just as sexy to write about as necks are and I remember having a really good time writing this one. And man, it's hard to have fun while writing and also enjoy the end product, but this is another fic that I go back to reread sometimes.

the missing piece of me (is you) - Stranger Things [23,000 words]

Summary:

Steve has been in a relationship with Jonathan and Nancy since the week before graduation (though he's not quite sure relationship is the right word; they're something and that's already more than he ever hoped for). With them, his summer was going better than he expected when his dad first cut him off. Then Dustin came back from camp with his secret Russian code. Between the ensuing drugs and interrogation, Steve's missing pieces of his summer—he doesn't remember that he's in a relationship at all. After Star Court, Nancy and Jonathan notice the distance Steve is putting between them and worry he's realized trying to make the three of them work is too complicated; especially when they see just how comfortable he is around Robin.

Ah yes. The only big bang fic I've written since joining this fandom that I actually like. Forever and always have to thank @pterawaters for coming up with the original idea for this fic when I was struggling and stressing out trying to think of something on my own. The initial idea should have been simple enough, but then when I started writing, it took on a life of its own and suddenly I was writing a Before and After style fic and man. I am still really freaking proud of how it turned out! It's definitely one of my all time favorites. plus everyone should seriously listen to the playlist that ptera made for it because fuck, it fits the tone of the fic so well and it still lives on the main screen of my phone

The Best People He Knows - Stranger Things [3,692 words]

Summary:

Steve doesn't just drive Dustin to the dance. He comes over to help with Dustin's hair first (and gets some hugs while he's there). -- "Are you sure we have enough time?" Dustin asks, his voice urgent, not unlike how he sounded back when he convinced Steve to help him track down his demo-dog. Not that Steve blames him. School dances are harder to navigate than just about anything, including the Upside Down.

This is the very first fic I ever wrote for Stranger Things. It's probably the closest I'll ever EVER get to writing Steve Harrington in character. And even when rereading it after going to get the link, I think it still holds up. I don't know, it's a very nothing fic in that not much happens in it. But it makes me happy and I love it and I hope that people will continue to find it in the future and give it a shot.

#the babysitter 2017 #free guy #stranger things #ketwan #stoncy #thanks for the ask!#seriously #this was so much fun #gosh I miss rec lists #I can't forget to make one this year for OTHER people's fics #my writing #asks #anonymous #self recs

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morvantmortuary · 1 year

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12, 56, or 67 for the ask prompts - whichever of these you find most inspired by for our Maxi 🖤

12: "I'll love you til my breathing stops"

56: "I am not myself anymore, I'm yours"

67: "You're so perfect, why do you want me?"

hi bee! :’D sorry I’m an idiot! 🖤

I’ll be honest, this one is definitely more… personal than I intended. I started writing it when I was really Going Through It w/r/t some depression stuff, a minor existential crisis where I wondered if it was worth staying in my program, dealing with the fact that my closest friends were also going through it and nothing I said seemed to help, just a whole slew of stuff that left me feeling rock bottom.

another part of it, I think, is that I have this weird thing where even though these were yandere prompts, I just… had this thing where I couldn’t just write the Reader hearing them? like, I thought for even someone like Maxi, who worships the ground his reader walks on, to out and say some of these things, I had to like - justify them somehow. Like I couldn’t hear them unless I was emotionally bleeding out, almost. maybe it’s because I’m a sucker for hurt/comfort, or something else I need to go to therapy about idk

and then once I got so far in, I was like “rae wtf this is such a fucking bummer, no one is gonna want to read this,” and so for a while I thought about starting over again just for something more fun

but, eventually, I reread this piece again, and decided that even if it’s kind of a sad start, maybe someone else could use something for the worst kind of days. I meant to post this on Yule, bc “longest night of the year” and all, but we all know how I am with doing anything remotely on time :’D

so, if anyone else is maybe having a hard time on this xmas eve, I hope maybe this is a small something to help

warnings for some really vicious self-talk on the part of the Reader, v v v brief discussion of su!cidal thoughts (like I said, I was going through it), descriptions of an anxiety attack, Maxi being a little too happy to murder anyone who hurt you, Maxi and his Reader swearing their deaths to each other, descriptions of necromancy, patricide, etc.

merry xmas, and rora and hector both have pieces coming too - this was just the one that got finished first 🖤 thanks for being kind enough to request, and I’m sorry again it took so long! I hope it’s okay 🖤

it hurts because you’re alive

(maxi morvant x gn!reader)

It wasn’t often you still had to contend with the voice from the darkest part of your brain. The one that had stalked you through the left-hand mirrors from the Masquerade, the one that some demonic presence - essence? Whatever - imitated in Maxi’s own mouth when it was trying to convince you to let yourself lay down and be prey. Since you’d been building yourself a pleasant life in Greymoon, one that you were more than happy to share with the man who’d stolen your heart, it had retreated back to whatever noxious neural fold it called home.

That didn’t mean there weren’t hard nights. Ones where it found you left vulnerable by an insomnia that refused to abate.

This was one of them.

You weren’t sure what had set it off, really: maybe it was the fact that Murphy’s Law had been in full effect at work, and nothing you tried had been enough to turn the day around. Maybe it was the phone call with your mom after, where more than one she’d suggested (albeit gently) that despite all the progress towards feeling like yourself again you’d made since moving here, there was still more you could be doing. Maybe it was the texts you’d swapped with Pavi that afternoon, where she rehashed the latest fight she’d had with a girlfriend she would’ve readily called awful if she’d been yours, Em’s, or Laurie’s. As carefully as you’d tried to point out that Pavi seemed to accept things for herself that she would’ve found intolerable for any of her friends, the two of you had just gone in circles, with Pavi insisting that she was probably just being biased in her recounting of the argument and you nearly pleading with her to consider how she’d feel if anyone else she loved was being treated the same way. When this proved fruitless, you’d eventually stopped and just let your friend vent until she felt better. It was the least you could do.

But long after you’d said goodnight, you were still sitting cross-legged on the end of your bed, lost in thought as you worried the skin on your lower lip with your teeth. After years of living with your specific brain curses, your usual self-soothing method was straightening up your house while listening to music as loud as you could stand it on your headphones; the idea being that bouncing between tasks with something drowning out the Voice would eventually convince it to give up and let you focus on anything else. But tonight, that had only left you more restless than usual. Your brief attempt to sleep had just ended in you plugging your string of fairy lights back in and returning to your playlist, trying to ward off your internal darkness with external stimuli.

How did you think you would be enough?

You trapped a piece of skin between your teeth, and bit down.

No, really. How did you possibly think anything you had to offer, to any of them, would be enough?

“It’s not about me,” you muttered aloud. “It was just a bad day. Shit happens. I’ll live, it’s fine.”

Your teeth, however, bit down once again on the spot. You could just taste the faintest trace of blood.

And now you’re talking to yourself. Just like old times.

Fuck off, you thought instead, but the Voice just seemed to crow in the fact that it’d made you change.

Oh, you little idiot. Just as spineless as you’ve always been. Your job knows that, you know - you weren’t smart enough or quick enough to improvise today. They all saw you fail. You let everyone down. Again.

This is unhelpful. You knew this was unhelpful. This was just wallowing. Everyone had bad days. This would pass. You would be fine.

…Right?

Your progress is not enough for your mother. She knows you can do more, do better. Be more. You can dress up laziness as contentment all you like, it’s still obvious to her. She must be so disappointed in what you turned out to be.

Your teeth kept sawing at the skin, and you winced at the sting of its separation from raw flesh, even as the taste of blood spread across your tongue.

Your love is not enough for your friend. It doesn’t matter how ferociously you care for her - it isn’t ever going to outweigh the hurt she’s willing to endure for even a taste of someone else’s. Someone real.

Stop, you begged yourself. You knew what came next.

How long until that ‘soulmate’ of yours sees all this and realizes his mistake?

You didn’t hear yourself whimper at this over the bass in your ears, the volume hurting now more than helping. You made no move to turn it down.

I’m curious. You suck at math, but make me laugh with an attempt: how long, exactly, do you think it will take for him to realize you weren’t worth the pain he went through? That he’s scarred, now, for nothing that could actually matter?

Your teeth picked a new spot and bit, but the tears were already there.

How long do you think you have until he resents you for your weaknesses? For everything you couldn’t be?

How long until even a creature of the utmost darkness finds you, and your broken little brain and heart, intolerable?

No, you pushed back. He’s not that. He isn’t, even with what he did. Does. He could never be. He’s good, his heart is good, despite everything that tried to force him to be otherwise.

Fine, the voice amended. Then how long until he gets restless because he’s stuck with a burden like you? Because you could never amount to more than everything you are that no one should ever have to deal with, much less love?

You blinked, feeling your breath begin to shake as something warm slid down your face.

There we go, the voice purred. You aren’t completely stupid after all. Gold star for effort.

You tried to force yourself to pick up your hands and wipe your face. Try to stem the flow of tears that turned your eyeliner into so much grime under your eyes, something else that added to the pathetic ineptness of your mien.

But they sat, listless and useless, on your thighs that took up too much room.

You can still exit gracefully, you know. …Well. As gracefully as possible for you. You owe everyone that much.

This was a lie. You knew, on some level, this was a lie. But it felt like the conscious You was locked at the back of your brain, kicking uselessly as this creature that seemed to slither and circle around the rest of your skull - and squeeze.

Your boyfriend’s a mortician, for crying out loud. He’ll at least make you look decent so you’re not a total embarrassment to anyone. Your mom won’t even have to clean up the mess when they find it.

…You had to admit. This made a certain, pragmatic amount of sense. It was tidy. Convenient.

Easier, perhaps, than the mortifying alternative of staying. Of letting anyone look too close.

He might even think one of your friends at the service is cute. Two birds, one stone. Provided any show up, of course.

That’s fair, you figured, this would be fairly short notice. People might still have to work, or have other plans, and you couldn’t expect people to drop everything for—

You let out a small shriek as you felt a chilled hand settle on your shoulder, nearly falling off your bed as you pushed hard away from the direction of your door.

When you just caught yourself on the edge of your mattress, you whipped around to see Maxi standing there, flattening himself as best he could against the doorframe and showing you his palms with an equally startled expression.

He mouthed something at you, and you could only blink, still not quite firing on all cylinders. He pointed to his own ear, looking concerned, and you jumped, quickly pulling your earbuds out.

“Sorry,” you managed. “Didn’t hear you come in.” You winced as you could hear your own voice crack, and before you could clear your throat, Maxi’s face changed.

“Hey now.” In one fluid motion, he crossed the space between you and fell to a knee where you perched at the end of your bed, peering up into your face with a familiar, scalpel-sharp scrutiny. “You okay, gorgeous?”

You looked away, trying to avoid his searching gaze, but he caught your jaw gently, guiding you by his fingertips at your chin to look at him again.

He made a small noise of alarm in his throat when you faced him, and when you finally met his eyes, he looked stricken. “Darlin’, talk to me, what’s wrong?” he murmured. His fingers traced over the tracks of your tears, wiping them away. He turned his hand slightly to examine his own fingertips, looking increasingly worried, before he moved closer to your knees to look up into your eyes. “Did someone upset you?”

For the most part, he still sounded like your partner - sweet, thoughtful, a habitual worrier - but you could hear the edge of something else creeping into his question. Something darker, lurking at the back of his own skull.

But how could you explain? If you told him what was going on - what was really happening - wouldn’t that just prove your inner darkness right? That you were a burden, demanding of care?

You kicked yourself internally, feeling guiltier now. Maxi already had to deal with a lot at his job, people grieving real losses. Why should he have to come home to even more crying from you, who was just wallowing in their own despair?

“Hey,” he urged again, softer, snapping you back to reality. He reached up, gently intertwining his fingers with yours where your hands still sat on your lap. “Angel, c’mon. You’re scarin’ me a little here. Tell me what’s goin’ on, okay? Let me help. Do I need to have words with someone?” He traced his thumbs across the back of your hands, trying to soothe you - but you fixated on the way he subconsciously rolled his shoulder, the one you had marked on that dark Halloween in the cemetery.

For some reason, it was that gesture - so innocuous, yet obvious in how you seemed to inflict yourself on him, on everyone - that finally broke the dam between your sinking heart and the world outside. The spiral had you fully in its grasp, and there was no getting out.

Your eyes blurred over as you looked resolutely down, feeling tears escaping their bounds faster than you could hold them back. A few of them made splattered constellations on the skin of your legs, just adjacent to where Maxi’s hands where intertwined with yours. You bit down on your lip, trying to muffle the sob that had been building for what felt like the entire evening, but the smallest of sounds still managed to wriggle its way out around your teeth.

Maxi let go of your hands abruptly, and you couldn’t blame him for his withdrawal - until the cold clutch of them encircled your face, guiding your head gently upwards to meet his eyes.

What you found waiting for you was the color of blood from deep in the body, seeming to burn of their own accord in the dim of your room. He was practically nose to nose with you, staring at you over the tops of his glasses with a look like a knife’s edge. “Give me a name,” he said, so soft it was barely more than a whisper. His fingers stroked your skin, but his grip was firm. “And they won’t see sunrise. I promise.” He leaned forward to close the distance between you, kissing gently at one of the tracks of your tears - but you still felt the brief, hot touch of the tip of his tongue to the spot. “Let me take care of it for you, please.”

You sniffled, trying to rescue some shred of composure. “It’s n-nobody. Really.”

“Oh, angel,” Maxi cooed, pulling just slightly back. He traced a new trail down your cheek with his thumb, hovering close to you. “You don’t have to defend anyone who doesn’t deserve it. Whatever it was, whatever they said to cause - this,” his hand flipped to stroke your skin with a knuckle. “It’s justified for me.” He kissed your forehead before meeting your eyes again.

You shook your head as the last of your composure slipped through your grip. “It’s not even a-anybody’s fault,” you managed around the lump in your throat. “I s-swear, it’s just…” You swallowed hard, but the ache just caused you to stop. “It’s just my fucking broken-ass brain.”

“…It’s what now?” You could practically hear the record scratch in Maxi’s brain as the murder dropped out of his expression entirely, leaving him blinking as the glimmering red seemed to cool like the last embers of a campfire.

You hurriedly wiped your eyes with the sleeve of your hoodie. “It’s nothing, I told you,” you mumbled. “I’m just fucking sad again over some stupid shit that doesn’t m-matter, like always,” you tried to inhale, but your breath shook too hard for you to get any relief. “And I c-can’t change it—“

Your heart was thundering in your ears, washing out all other sound. You were drowning.

“B-because I’m not g-good at making anything better, for anyone—“

Your skin was too hot. You felt seasick. This was really it, wasn’t it. The moment that you finally tipped your hand and showed how much of a wreck you really were inside, and he would make the only logical decision. One you could never blame him for, really, because it was inevitable.

It fell out of your mouth in a rush, insensate almost to your own ears: “And I’m just going to be like this forever, and you’re going to get sick of me and leave, and why shouldn’t you, when I can’t even keep my shit together and just be a n-normal fucking functional—“

You were aware of the words dying on your lips, the sudden movement causing the ache to leave your lungs in an exhale, but you weren’t sure of the cause.

You also weren’t quite sure why the room shifted, or why you were suddenly staring up at your ceiling rather than down at your feet, but you were conscious of being cocooned in the essence of your partner: the faintest hint of embalming fluid, something like wood polish, the cologne he put on this morning, and the touch of laundry detergent that had started to smell like home to you.

You realized he’d taken you both to your mattress in a near-tackle, cradling you before you could realize what was happening. You were caged in his arms now, laying sideways next to him with your hands pressed against his chest between the pair of you. The pressure you felt around your torso was him squeezing like he was trying to keep you from coming apart at your ribs.

Like you were something fragile.

It took you a moment to realize further that his lips were against your hair, and the hiss you heard was him shushing the tiny, cracking sobs that were finding their way piecemeal out of your chest.

“No, baby, I’m always gonna be yours,” Maxi murmured into your hair. “It’s okay, baby. You’re my life, I’m not goin’ anywhere.” He kissed your head like he was trying to kiss your skull itself. “Mine’s broke too. It’s okay.”

You half-sobbed, half-hiccuped. “I’m sorry. I didn’t— you shouldn’t have to—“

“Nothin’ to apologize for,” Maxi insisted, somehow managing to hug you tighter without bruising your sides. “You’re mine. I won’t ever go somewhere without you.”

“But I’m a mess,” you blurted wetly against his vest, your chest kicking like a horse from the inside. “I’m such a mess, Maxi, I’m gonna wear you out. I wear everyone out, you don’t understand.”

Maxi shifted so instead of keeping you against his chest, he was eye-level with you, squeezing your shoulders in his hands as his glasses were somewhat crooked against your pillow. “Darlin’, I know everything feels wrong right now, and your brain’s not fightin’ fair,” he said softly, his eyes wide as he searched yours. “But I think your sense of scale is a little bit… skewed, here.” He smiled weakly. “I’m not tryin’ to make light of anything, but I think I have a little more reason to be worried about somethin’ like that.”

Your heart was racing in your chest like you were trying to drive with no way to steer. “I don’t wanna make you tired of me,” you managed, not entirely sure if you were making sense anymore. “I don’t want to make your mark hurt anymore, I don’t want you to come home from a long day to me being a drain, I don’t want you to realize you got a bad deal.”

“Angel,” Maxi soothed, running a hand over your hair. “You’re not thinkin’ straight. That’s not somethin’ I would think about you, ever. You’re talkin’ to the serial killer here, remember?” he added, with a laugh that sounded more nervous than anything. “You’re the one who got more than you signed up for.”

“You had to go through that whole thing with your dad, and They Who Decide,” you went on, as if he’d proved your point. “You wouldn’t have had to if I wasn’t here. You wouldn’t have had to get hurt, or get possessed, or—“

“For you, I’d do it all again tomorrow,” Maxi said, his voice soft. “In a heartbeat. I don’t care.”

You shook your head, not sure how you couldn’t make him see what was right in front of his eyes. “I’m not worth that, Maxi, that’s what I’m trying to tell you now rather than you waste more time.”

“And I’m tryin’ to tell you,” Maxi argued, his eyes plaintive. “That I don’t care what that demon in your head says, baby. I got one too,” he insisted, loosening an arm so he could gesture at his temple. “The real one and the one that comes from growin’ up thinkin’ I’m dead already, and nothin’ would ever change that. You have no idea how many times a day I wish to god,” he smiled, and it was strained. “I wish I could go back, somehow, and tell me when I was livin’ through the worst parts — every dark basement, every broken body, every night feelin’ absolutely fuckin’ inhuman — that we were gonna find you. That all this bullshit was gonna turn out to be worth it. All the years of feelin’ like I couldn’t tell anyone the truth, and we survived.”

Your shoulders bucked slightly as you fought your sobs. “I don’t want to let you down. I’m so scared of disappointing you, you don’t understand—“

Maxi took your face in his hands again, his gaze pleading. “No, you don’t understand,” he said, and you could hear him fighting to keep his voice steady. “You don’t have to be the one that’s afraid of that. You could never disappoint me in a way that matters. I’d swear it to you on our future tomb. I need you to listen to me, baby, I will love you ’til my breathin’ stops and long, long after. There’s nothin’ you could do, no part of you that you hate that would ever make me think otherwise. You could put a bullet through the dead center of my chest, and not only would I think you were in the right, I’d still love you when I hit the ground.”

The idea of causing him harm of any sort squeezed your throat harder than the lump that was already there. “I don’t know how you can say that,” you whispered, shaking your head. “I keep waiting for you to realize that I’m not enough to justify that kind of pain. I’m so scared of hurting you. Of being the reason you get hurt.” Your hands found his shoulders and your fingers curled tightly into the fabric of his shirt, desperate for something to hold on to. “You’ve already been through so much, you don’t deserve to suffer when you can avoid it. I couldn’t stand myself if I brought that on you, on top of all my shit you already have to put up with.”

The red returned to Maxi’s eyes, and oddly, you were more soothed than alarmed. You almost wanted his darker self there as a form of assurance, to know that it could protect the man you loved from the fathomless chasm that felt like it was splitting your chest.

“Listen to me,” he demanded, that shadow from his eyes creeping into his words. “I never… I never got to belong to myself, you understand? I was always my family’s next chess piece on the board, or They Who’s next prize monster, or the reaper’s host. I knew that. I spent my life knowin’ that, and I didn’t see another option.”

You recognized the way his fingers of his left hand moved against your back, his tell for weighing his options. The way his eyes went briefly distant, you realized he was making a decision.

His free hand moved to his chest, tracing the scar there through the fabric of his clothes. “…This wasn’t…” He trailed off, his lips a frustrated line as he chose his words. His eyes met yours again, the red still there, brighter now. “…This wasn’t just my dad,” he said at last. “I mean, he put the first one there. The original.” He hesitated a moment longer, the tip of his tongue briefly tracing his lip. “…When I thought my family’s legacy was all I had — all I’d ever have — I reopened it.”

You flinched in horror at the very idea, knowing just how deep that scar tissue went, how thick it was over the muscle. “Oh, Maxi… why, baby?”

A corner of his mouth twitched into a grimace “There’s all sorts of things you can do with a heart when you know how, babydoll. Unnatural things that no one can undo… that no good person would ever dream of.” His eyes moved to a point in the distance over your shoulder, something in them dimming. “And for a long time, I studied it. I read everythin’ I could find about it. It was all I could dream about anymore.” His eyes flicked back to yours. “I was ready to give up blood, skin, and bone for just the chance that it would work.”

Your tears were sticky on your face where they were drying, and you fought a shiver from somewhere deep in your gut, like it recognized something in Maxi’s words you didn’t. “…So what happened?” You couldn’t help but whisper, despite the fact that it was just the two of you in your room.

Like you were afraid something else would hear you.

An exceptionally grim smile bloomed on Maxi’s face. “Not my proudest moment, is what.” He looked away from you again, as if he couldn’t bear to hold your gaze. “Or maybe it was, I don’t know. It was the night I buried my mother. I wasn’t sober by any means, but my father was dead drunk. He interrupted me, we got to arguin’, then screamin’, and before I quite realized what I’d done… he was just dead.”

Silence settled over the pair of you as he met your eyes again, watching you like he was waiting for you to recoil from him. To suddenly realize in that moment what kind of monster had been sharing your bed for all this time.

“…Yeah, well,” you murmured. You reached up, gently brushing a lock of his hair away from his eyes as you held his gaze. “Good riddance.”

Maxi’s smile softened into the one you knew best, his eyes relieved despite the shade lingering in them. “I didn’t realize just how lucky I was that night. Not by half.” He reached up, moving some of your hair on your pillow away from your face. “Because later, after so long of never belongin’ to myself, you let me be yours. And you gave me back what was left of me, you hear?” He swallowed hard, and you could finally see the glow that had swept in with the familiar red gleam was at least partially tears of his own. He traced the line of your cheek. “You reminded me I was still a person, somewhere under all of this. That I was allowed to want more than just grittin’ my teeth and gettin’ through what brief mortal life I was meant to have.” He shifted on his pillow again, closing the distance between the two of you. “I spent ages askin’ myself, ‘they’re the closest thing to perfect I’ve ever had, the hell do they want with me?’ And—“ He stopped, forcing himself to take a breath that wasn’t quite steady anymore. “And you took such… care of me,” he went on. “You loved me so much, I started to believe I could just… be human, after all this time. Could deserve to be loved, even.”

He moved his hands so his arms encircled your waist again, hugging you tightly while giving him enough space to keep eye contact. “You have no idea how many times in my life I went out in the dark and didn’t care if I saw daylight,” he said softly. “But that night we walked into the Masquerade together, I knew I’d fight Hell itself just to stay alive with you for one more hour. I’d never been more certain of anything in my entire life.”

The heat that seemed to fill your own eyes, lingering at your lash line, was from something entirely different now.

“Your brain chemistry can run its miserable little mouth all it wants, darlin’.” Maxi rested his forehead gently against yours. “And I’ll be here to hold you until it quiets down, whenever you need me to. But it’s dead wrong. I know that for a fact.” One of his hands, still cool to the touch, cupped your cheek like you were something wondrous. “There is nothin’ about my life you haven’t made better just by bein’ in it. And we’re gonna live a longer one still. A happy one, despite everythin’, together,” he took one of your hands in his, bringing it gently to his lips. “I love you exactly as you are. I always will.”

Fresh rivulets formed on your face, but these felt… different. Like rain after a drought.

You wound your arms around his neck, trapping his chest — scar and all — against your own. “I love you the same,” you whispered. “Exactly as you are. All of you.” You pressed a single kiss to the corner of his mouth. “And there’s nothing that can ever change that.”

Maxi’s grin was unmistakable. “Y’know, it’s the damnedest thing,” he said quietly. “For the first time, I’m lookin’ forward to livin’ through whatever’s next.”

You smiled for what felt like the first time in days. “I’m glad I get to be here for it.”

Maxi leaned forward to kiss you properly, long and slow as though to make it last the rest of your lives.

#nice people #bee!! 🖤🥰#maxi morvant #maximilian vincent morvant #morvant mortuary #maxi morvant x reader #maxi morvant x you #maxi and his reader #maxi's final them #slasher oc #necromancer oc #slasher oc x reader #gn!reader #genderqueer reader #non-binary reader #plus size reader #reader's in a dark place #not quite hurt/comfort but close

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lemonsrosesandlavender · 1 month

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THINGS THAT I WOULD LIKE TO KNOW ABOUT MY FELLOW WRITERS

this is a super fun tag prompt list, thanks @littleplasticrat!

tagging: @commander-krios @graysparrowao3 and anyone else who wants it!

here we go ✨ below the cut for considerable length, discussion of my generally E-rated work and brief unpopular opinions (lol).

Last book I read: I’m currently part way through The Left Hand of Darkness (Ursula K Le Guin) and Exhalation (Ted Chiang), and am in a constant state of rereading Pride and Prejudice. Honestly just been writing more than reading lately but I really want to finish these two books! I also devoured The New Topping Book as fuel for my Steel Weave kink adventures, lmao.

Greatest literary inspiration: Pride and Prejudice. Austen in general. (Story time) I once dated a guy who dismissed her books out of hand as ‘gossipy’, and then literally days later proceeded to tell me that when drinking with his bestie, they loved to ‘analyse other people’s personalities.’ What he thought he had that Austen didn’t, I don’t know. (God, the sexism. And yes, I did tell him that what he was doing was in fact also gossiping).

Austen sketches people in all their ignorance and kindness and flaws and virtues at once, whilst being deeply funny about it. I love her work.

Things in my current fandom I want to read but I don't want to write:

I LOVE omeluum x blurg. No desire to write for them but they’re great. (Check out weatheredlaw on AO3 for amazing Omelurg!)

Generally I’ve read and enjoyed for all of the tadpole gang and all sorts of other characters, but aside from having them feature in my Rolan fics the urge doesn’t strike me to write about them. My thoughts are extremely occupied with just the one guy.

Things in my current fandoms I want to write but I think nobody would be interested in them but me: Unhinged kink fics. If I ever write them, I’ll probably post on an alt account, because I think my current subscribers probably aren’t looking for [redacted niche kink] lol

You can recognise my writing by:

Relentlessly horny vibes. Bratty Rolan.

I honestly don’t know if I’ve got a particularly recognisable style - it varies a lot between the fandoms I write in, I think. I’m not given to lots of purple prose but neither is my writing spare. I overdo it on facial expressions, that’s for sure!

My most controversial take ( current fandom):

In an absolute shocker, I don’t enjoy dom!Rolan at all, or see it as particularly in-character. But you could guess that already if you’re following me lol. I filter all related tags/content liberally…

Current writing mood (10 – super motivated and churning out words like crazy, 0 – in a complete rut): It was a 9-10, and has been for months - but this week I’ve been smacked in the face with a real stumbling block so I’ll give it a (hopefully temporary) 6-7

Top three favourite tropes: Oooh. Ahhhh. Forced Proximity - only one bed, handcuffed together, trapped in a lift - whatever. Just make those people boil over with desire because they CANNOT AVOID the person they’re desperately trying to. Arguing. I love steamy argumentative kissing in stories. Forbidden Love. I am ESPECIALLY a huge fan of priests/nuns/religiously celibate breaking their vows, but doctor/patient is good too (Harvey SDV my beloved), or university professor/student, or sworn members of separate factions. Whatever. I want that sexual tension to be so fucking scorching it breaks through every barrier, and their love to conquer all.

Share a random frustration: Chapter 10 of Planar Tears. It’s coming along now but - I don’t like falling behind schedule! It’s also once again illustrated to me that although outlining is useful, at some points my characters will just develop a mind of their own. I just realised that after the last two extremely dramatic plot chapters - there needs to be a similarly dramatic step in Rolan and Catrin’s relationship as payoff. I think that’s the issue, anyway. I’d written a load of relatively lowkey flirty fluff and it just. Wasn’t. Hitting. I have honestly entered the stage of ‘please fucking kill me I no longer know if this writing is good’ and think I just have to weather the storm here!

#cabbage was tagged #cabbage writes #fanfic

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jesuisici33 · 10 months

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Fic authors self rec! When you get this, reply with your favorite five fics that you've written, then pass on to at least five other writers. Let’s spread the self-love❤

thank you anon!

1.Let's Play a Game- Spies Are Forever. (E) (my first published fic on this account)

Sometimes both Curt and Owen like to use their spy skills to have some fun in the bedroom.

2.Public Relations -Schitt's Creek (E) (my first multichap fic, a test to prove I can write a multichap fic and finish it, and I did!)

Patrick Brewer and Rachel Davis are everyone's favorite rom-com actors, and since this is the sixth time they're playing a couple and with the public demanding when they're going to start dating, their PR manager, Alexis Rose has them perform a PR relationship for two years to help promote their latest movie. Patrick, however has recently been casted in the new book to series adaption of The Thief and the Prince alongside David Rose, making his fake relationship with Rachel go into jeopardy.

3. Clandestine Meetings-Schitt's Creek (E) (my kinkiest fic to date)

Patrick goes to a bar looking to get laid and meets the one man who can make all his fantasies come true.

4. cause i believe that we were supposed to find this - 911: Lonestar (T) (my first soulmate fic, and got a bigger response than I thought with such sweet comments i love to reread!)

As soon as they are at the scene a cop is already there waiting for him. He’s younger than TK expected. He greets his dad before letting him take the lead of the scene. TK doesn’t get a good look at him, doesn’t bother interacting with him - too busy to do his job of getting Allison out of her car. In fact, he even forgets about the timer on his wrist. If he did, he would’ve noticed that the countdown is less than a minute. When the 126 find out that Allison has another baby - one not still inside her - it doesn’t take long for Paul to figure out the baby miraculously landed in a tree. And isn’t that a news story. The cop comes up to TK and asks, “How the hell-” when two distinct buzzing sounds go off. Both men look down at their wrists. Or, you're born with a timer on your wrist that counts down to when you meet your soulmate.

5.Castles Crumbling Down-911 (T) (this fic brought my first anon to tell me how much they loved this fic and kindly told me if there's ever a second chap, they would love it! (hint: there will be a second chap))

Eddie sits down on the bench, laying his head back against the cold stone wall. With his eyes closed and arms crossed, he hopes it fools the guards into thinking Eddie is more calm than he really is. That they can’t tell how much his heart is pounding or how his skin itches to start punching things. Again. Just like how they found him when his hood fell off and people let out cries that the Princess Assassin is here amongst them. OR: i had a tumblr prompt in my ask box and when i watched nimona things finally clicked.

not saying these are my fave fics, but i guess these are the fics to get to know me best. thank you so much for this ask anon! i don't really see my fics in any recs, so getting to self promote through this means a lot :D

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writingwife-83 · 7 months

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For your fic asks - 3, 6, 14, 18! 🙂

3. What’s your favorite fic that you’ve written?

It’s always so hard to say because I’m proud of certain fics for different reasons. But I will say, I love I Told You So partly because of the fact that I kinda tackled that one myself, aside from getting little prompts from readers for parts of it. At the time I had no friendly editor to help with detailed plotting and tweaking, and I was quite a newbie. The original finished product was not very polished tbh, so I’m really proud of how well it did despite all of that. ☺️

6. Are there any fics from others you reread all the time?

Tbh, no. But that’s not because I don’t love lots of people’s fics! I just don’t tend to re-read very much. I have certainly re-read parts of fics sometimes, like my OG fave The Full House by @strawberrypatty but even that one I don’t think I ever re-read from start to finish after finishing it the first time. Again, that’s not any kind of insult to the fics, it’s just not something I do. 🤷‍♀️

14. If you could see one of your fics adapted into a visual medium, such as a comic or film, which fan fic would you pick?

Come to think of it, I think I Told You So would make a pretty cute comic! It’s humorous and there’s a lot of twists and turns in the plot, so I can imagine it being a really fun (albeit long lol) comic series.

And Idk if I ever mentioned this on here before, but this just reminded me that a couple years ago I actually had a reader from long ago reach out and say they were getting a film degree and asked for permission to adapt one of my longer sherlolly fics into an Indie film while giving credit to me for the original story idea. I was, naturally, shooketh. 🤯 😆 And extremely flattered! Ultimately I didn’t give permission though, because if any fanfic I’ve written ever gets adapted to original fiction, I’d want that to be done directly by me. Doesn’t mean I’m planning to lol, but I would want to be the one to take a crack at it if ever it happened. Who knows!

18. What’s one of your favorite lines you’ve written in a fic?

This is an old favorite of mine from Zephyr-

When Sherlock's lips parted, her's instinctively did as well, and then the connection became so much more than the brush of one person's mouth on another's. This was a bond that was nothing short of all consuming and mild altering. The action and reaction, touch and taste, pressure and pull, and the give and take. This was what poems were written about, songs were sung about, and battles were fought over. This was what it meant to kiss, and to be kissed.

#fanfic writer asks #wifey answers things #sherlolly #thanks for asking!#that wraps up my asks #now I should try to keep my typing fingers going and finish my wip chapter…

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bitchkay · 5 months

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Ok. Hear me out: A threesome with Guy and Toa to see who can pleasure you the best. And it ends with the two of them kissing. This would be a wholesome moment to you (it is), but your head is spinning (prolly from all the orgasms they gave you)

Hello?????????????

I say once more, same anon or we're all just horny😳

No but literally I have so many drafts its getting ridiculous😭😭 but I also love receiving asks and writing 18 different things at the same time

Keeps my brain sharp😼😼

Also, tea, like half of my drafts on here won't let me edit them??????????????????

Like the majority of my drafts are admittedly blank reblogs of writing prompts, horny posting, and fanfics I just like to read over an over again so they dont get lost in my feed when I want to reread it for the 100th time and most of not all of them would let me edit them but like asks and stand alone posts don't?????????? have??????????? the??????????????? edit????????????? button????????????????

It's so weird like today I wasnt doing anything so I was like damn might aswell tackle these drafts and like more than half of them just didn't?????????? have??????????? the??????????????? edit????????????? button????????????????

Like theres the delete button, the schedule button and the post button

The edit button is supposed to be between the delete button and the schedule button

That little pencil icon simply wasn't there

So me still wanting to like work on my shit ends up scrolling and looking for the one draft that does have the edit button so I can y'know work on it

Which btw was actually productive, it was a headcanons post and each character had 8ts own baby scenario that I was writing which is super fun and fresh and it's a part 1 to an eventual part 2

But yea like that's kinda fucked up like I decide to work on something and it doesn't even give me the option to do that

Also side note I wish we could like organize our drafts into like folders cus like most of my drafts are blank reblogs so I have to like file through those to get to what I want to get to

Like it would be nice to separate my drafts like ok this is all the horny postings, these are writing prompts, these are fanfics, this are asks I need to finish, these are headcanon posts I need to finish, these are scenarios I need to finish, ect. I even have like fanfic templates in my drafts like if I finish a fanfic I just plug in the information (title, content warnings, change the character banner ect.) add the tags and put it out, have those in a folder of some sort

And this would probably serve more than just me like I feel like other people would also benefit from having the option to put your shit in like folders and shit and if you don't then you just don't have to use them

Also (not me rambling)

The draft I screenshoted btw (also not editable atm) Guy and Toa do in fact kiss.

Just wanted to mention that :)

#kay answers #guy avari #toa qelsum

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the---hermit · 1 year

Text

Fantasy reading challenge #1

This post has been sitting in my draft for longer than I had intended. As I mentioned in other posts 2023 is my year of fantasy, for some reason I am really into a fantasy mood and this challenge came at the perfect time. I did join it on the storygraph at the beginning of the year, so I am doing pretty well with it so far. This first update has quite a few books I have read in the past months, and I imagine I will wait until I am done with it to post a second update (if I will in fact finish it, since last year I almost finished but never completed challenges).

Individual book reviews are linked in the book titles below as usual.

The Priory Of The Orange Tree by Samantha Shannon for the high fantasy prompt

I have spoken about this novel so much in many other posts, so I won't spend too much time in this one, but I loved it. It might seem intimidating because of the lenght, but it's incredibly accessible (so much so that I would even venture in recommending it to people who don't really read this genre). It's a very well done epic fantasy, the writing is great, the world-building is absolutely amazing, I loved it and cannot wait to read the prequel.

Anansi Boys by Neil Gaiman for the urban fantasy prompt

Another book I have spoked about in other posts, this was the last unread book on my Gaiman shelf, which means I definitely have to get the books I am missing by him. Urban fantasy is not my favourite subgenre, and this wasn't my favourite Gaiman book, but it was entertaining and fun, so I have nothing so say against it.

The Tower Of Swallows by Andrzej Sapkowski for the grimdark fantasy prompt

Me and my Witcher books. I have been reading this series for a few years now, and it's been a lot of ups and downs. This was a down. I found this novel very slow, and it kinda killed my hype for it, I really hope that the next book in the series will be better.

Gideon The Ninth by Tamsyn Muir for the science fantasy prompt

One of the best books I have read so far this year. I have fallen in love with this series, and this book was simply amazing. The idea behind this story is very unique, and the writing is incredible. I didn't get into this expecting it to be funny, but I laughed a lot. I adored my time with it, and this is already in my rereading list. (If the Italian publisher would release the thrid book of the series now I'd be very grateful, this waiting is painful).

Geronimo Stilton and The Kingdom Of Fantasy 1 for the children's fantasy prompt

This is a beloved childhood series I hadn't read in so long. It was magical to get back into it, and relive this story. I am so so happy I did pick it up again, because it made me fall in love with this series all over again.

#2023 fantasy reading challenge #studyblr w/ knives reading challenge #reading challenge #reading challenge update #reading #books #book recs #book reviews #book recommendations #bookblr #booklr #bookish #fantasy books #studyblr #mine #the---hermit

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saengak · 1 year

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Just popping over here as if I did not use your ao3 user to find your tumblr a few months ago hahaha. (this is probably the most coherent i'll ever be bc i'm typing from a laptop but i'll probably sound really intense and bonkers so sorry about that haha)

I wanted to come over here in the least weird way flat spin is genuinely such a treasure to read. thank you so much for posting it and taking the time to write such a spectacular world of character dynamics. it's easy to read in the sense that you know this wasn't an easy thing to right. every chapter and decision feels so thoughtful and i can imagine the agonoy of deciding which path the characters took.

i understand it was a prompt fill and i read the original prompt and wow, if i was that person i would be over the moon. you took the prompt and made it into this multi dimensional world with it's own intricacies. stuff like the reg office, never would have thought about that but it fits so perfectly into the world and it makes sense, it's impact on the characters is rippling. i feel like a crazy person but i can't stop thinking about the most recent chapter. i keep coming back to the "if you love something set it free, if it comes back it's yours but if it doesn't it was never meant to be"

i just, i'm obsessed and in awe. thank you, take care. if a hiatus is what you need take one for as long as you need. if you really wanted to you could end the fic here haha, anything more is a bonus. you've gifted us a masterpiece, thank you

Hey hey! :') Please go completely bonkers and feral and rest assured that I absolutely love all your comments, thank you so much!! <3

Honestly when I starting writing FSHOS, I had not even thought that it would get to where is it today. We just hit 1000 kudos a few days ago, can you believe it?? I continue to be amazed at all the love that it is getting. Just totally blown away.

I might be giving my thank you speech too early when the fic isn't even finished, but I just want to say that most of the things you mentioned? I could only manage to write those out because of OP's amazing prompt which kickstarted this whole project and all the incredible comments and support from y'all (especially you! yes!).

Fun fact: in my original draft, half of Ch3 and half of Ch4 didn't exist, Ice and Mav made up by the end of Ch6, and the story ended soon after (with Mav going back to Top Gun). As you can tell, the fic has been rewritten and extended A LOT haha. I literally re-evaluate my plans for the rest of the fic after receiving comments for each chapter because y'all have such incredible ideas and point out a lot of my blind spots. (Oops there goes my authorly omniscience but that never existed anyway.)

I feel like I'm running a book club and I LOVE IT. I'm just overjoyed with every interaction, y'know?

Ok ok I need to stop gushing ahaha :') I just wanna say: thank you so much, I've reread this ask so many times and I can hardly believe how highly you think of my writing <3 I can't wait to return with more IceMav, so please take care too as well in the meanwhile!

#asks #replies #blazingstar29 #I'm going to be returning to this ask #whenever I need to marinate my brain in serotonin #flat spin heading out to sea

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icharchivist · 4 months

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Hello again, it's me, the fanfic writer

First of all, thanks so, so much for your sweet comments, I always love rereading them, you're a joy to write for <3

But secondly, I just have to let you know that out of the three husbandos of the askbox, Belial is not the worst one to write for

Sure, inspiration for him tends to hit me like a sledgehammer, but I've had a WIP with him lying around for two years now and he's never bothered me about it. He's just perfectly happy to lounge around in the back of my mind and wait until I'm ready to give him the time of day again. Very patient

Lu Woh surprised me, because he genuinely hit me out of nowhere - and we already talked about how weird the timing of it all was - because I didn't think I'd write for him at any point. He gave me a nice and simple idea that I originally even thought about just leaving in the askbox before I decided to flesh it out a bit and then didn't push any further. While I was supposed to go to sleep, I figured hey, let's just finish this thing right now, it's short and sweet, after all. So I did and everyone was happy

It's Seofon who then decided to be a pest

I didn't plan on writing anything for him either, I didn't really have any fun ideas, but then I kept getting hit with that stargazing scenario. Like he slipped the boundary some money to insistently prod me while I was trying to fall asleep

Well, it worked. I hope he's happy, because he was holding my sleep hostage until I delivered

I had to get on his piece literally right after I'd finished Lu Woh's. Madness

So yeah, before you try anything, know that Seofon can be incredibly annoying when he wants attention. But I guess that isn't altogether all that surprising

I definitely took some inspiration from asks I'd seen here before, I remember one Anon bringing up stealing his cape, for instance and I completely agree, if your partner has something like that, it's your legal obligation to steal it

And the ask about him fake-stretching to put an arm around you, because I could just see it so vividly

So big thanks to everyone here for being such a big inspiration, as always <3 Please take care

aahhh it's so so good to see you again hi <333

And aah i'm so glad you liked reading the comments, you deserve all the praises for all the goodies you bring us at all time and i'm so happy you enjoy that <33

as for the husbando madness, holy shit.

This is a miracle that somehow Belial isn't the worst. He seems to be behaving very nicely compared to his usual habits, i'm very impressed.

for Lu Woh, this is scary. Once again probably a bit of the hivemind because the timing is insane but, damn. He really came to you like a surprise. but it's so nice that he gave you a good idea and honestly, the Lu Woh story was really cute, i loved it.

(since it hasn't officially been linked, here it is)

"It's Seofon who then decided to be a pest" yeah that tracks (and that wording is making me laugh so hard)

(relinking the Seofon fic here)

"Like he slipped the boundary some money" dLKFJDKLFJDFLK THIS IS SO FUNNY. it really does feel like he kept nudging you like Daaaanchouuuu-chaaaaan where is MY fanfic. Amn't i in your thoughts enough. Please pretty please. please.

but in the end it really worked out so well, it's honestly so amazing. I noticed the timing between the Seofon fic and the Lu Woh fic was tight, but damn i didn't expect it to really be this "ok i'm done with Lu Woh, here, are you happy Seofon?"…. like their fight in a way.

Honestly the fact i could recognize some of the asks' prompt was so funny, i felt like

everytime there was a prompt i know i saw on my DMs. It was really funny.

Agreed totally on the stealing cape and the stretching, this is so fitting of him that it makes total sense you included it in your fic.

I'm so glad that this place can give you all the inspiration you need to write a bit more <333 what a delight! I'm genuinely so happy you feel this way and as the owner of this blog this is very humbling to think we can gather here, sharing silly ideas, throwing them at the wall and see what stick and all.

thank you once again for the fics you wrote and thank you for sharing them <333

I'm so delighted to see it and to see this ask ;D

take care!!

#ichareply #ichafantalks gbf #anonymous #i'll get back the original ask with the siete fic in it so siete anon knows it was made for them #but <333

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chin-chilla-7 · 1 year

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My Mammon, Leviathan, and Asmoedeus react to an MC invites them to hang out after they’ve apologized for how they’ve acted (Accountable AU) request is so good! I'm glad you think the prompt is cute too! I love this especially it feels disconnected since Mammon is in charge of taking care of them so it doesn't leave much of a choice for him, he noticed that even though it's quite difficult for him to admit he likes being with them, he doesn't know what to do to show he's sorry except apologizing XD, they do appreciate how he changed how he acts around them even though it's a little less of what they prefer, they decided to give him a chance, they asked him about the event they heard about, he stopped talking & walking when they asked him because he would be the one to ask while they would reluctantly accept his invitations, he accepted confidently but he's actually quite giddy, he got caught in those rigged games almost immediately when they arrived at the carnival, he's determined to win not because he wants to win a cute toy for them XD, he either runs out of Grimm or they pull him away from it to go on a ride, they appreciate the gesture even though he won't admit it, their favourite is when they beat him at bumper ride XD, both of them enjoyed themselves especially Mammon since they initiated the outing, they agreed when he said to do this more often, Leviathan didn't think much when he sent a text message about a new game that he wants to play but his brothers declined, he was so shocked that he kept rereading their text because he's usually the one who asked them, he's thrilled that he asked him, he offered to set it up in the common room but they said they don't mind playing in his room, he also asked if Mammon or Beelzebub are around but they said that they're not, he's even more flustered & asked for some time to set it up when it's actually to calm down, it still boggles him that they asked even though it has been a couple of months since the incident, he thought that he already ruined his chances but he won't waste the chance that's been given to him, he knows that they have come over to his room but he felt compelled as it felt special to spend time with just the two of them, he sent them a text message that they can come over when he's finished setting up, both of them had a great time, even his brothers noticed his good mood, they didn't really get to talk to Asmodeus since he's a very busy person, they didn't mind it at first but they wanted to spend some time with him ever since his apology, they decided to ask him if they want to go shopping since he probably knows the best spots & they still need to get used to the shopping districts in Devildom, how excited he was that he even squealed, his plans for both of them, they went shopping straight away even though they had no prior plans, he is so used to others wanting attention from him so the fact they asked him even though they didn't at first makes him so excited to have this opportunity, he really followed through with what he said & he still got a photo of their matching outfits if they didn't want it, he makes sure to make plans to go out again, and he had so much fun that he doesn't want to miss another chance! Thank you so much for doing my request because I love it so much :) I want to send in a request with the same prompt but did anyone send another? So I won't repeat the same character! Thank you :)

Thanks so much for the kind words! I'm glad you enjoy my writing! Right now, nope, noones sent in an ask with this prompt. The request I currently have in my inbox is a continuation of the Fake Forgiving with Belphegor.

#answers #anon #not writing

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masterhandss · 3 years

Note

May I ask, what happens in the short stories included in the Hamefura manga volumes? (e.g. highschool AU, kindergarten AU, genderbend AU, etc.)

Well, okay! I'm not good at summarizing stuff, so sorry in advance! I'm also writing these without rereading the Bonus SS so there may be small inaccuracies in these summaries. Some of these are gonna be longer than others depending on how much of I still remember lmao

I still suggest everyone go buy the manga volumes and give them a read, these extra chapters are so fun it makes me wish the anime fillers are always these wacky and entertaining (in fact I had to put writing this on hold because Season 2 adapted one of these, kinda XDD)

// spoilers for the hamefura manga volume bonus ss/special oneshots

Volume 1 - Untitled

Bakarina wakes up and realizes that she has no control over her body. She is confronted with a familiar scene of Katarina bullying Maria in Fortune Lover, and realizes that she's experiencing it from a first person point of view: through Katarina's eyes. She comments on how cruel Katarina is and explains the different ways she'd treat Maria differently, until Keith and Geordo arrive to save Maria. Bakarina feels unnerved and saddened by the angry and hateful looks that Keith and Geordo are giving her (Well it's Katarina, but Bakarina feels like they are look at her), and nervously wakes up from the dream. It is revealed that the dream took place some time before her arrival at the Magic Academy, and that she vows to work hard not to fall into a Bad End so that she'll never receive such hateful looks and be scorned by the otome game characters who she now considers to be her closest friends.

Volume 2 - Doom Route★Private School

Katarina gets awoken by Anne telling her that she needs to get ready to school. Katarina is surprised to find out that she has a school uniform and that she'll be heading to school in a fancy car. Anne tells Katarina that Keith won't be coming with her because he's already at school. When she gets there, she gets greeted by Keith who is part of the School's Disciplinary Committee. She is also greeted by Geordo, the SC President and his twin brother Alan, the Secretary. Keith's job is to check everyone's uniforms, so he reprimands the twins for their custom uniforms. Geordo tells him that he'll just have the rule changed, and that Keith's uptight attitude is why he doesn't have a girlfriend. This is how Katarina finds out that the engagement between Geordo and her is a verbal agreement between families, so she's technically engaged to him but it's not official.

After meeting up with all her friends, Katarina enters the classroom to find it looking just like her old one in Japan. She finds that she had scribbled doom flag avoidance plans on her desk and notebooks, and realizes that she's still in an otome game. Maria then enters and is introduced as the new scholarship student, and Katarina runs out to read her notebook. Everything is the same, from capture targets to rival characters , except the setting is a modern. Katarina finds out that her bad ends only lead to her getting either expelled and transferred or getting a restraining order. Katarina becomes confident in befriending Maria, and enthusiastically plans to enjoy her new life in a modern school. The chapter ends with Katarina buying lots of melon bread from the cafeteria, and wakes up form the dream before she could eat it.

Volume 3 - My Next Life in a Fantasy RPG

Katarina is awaken by Miri, who tells her that she is late and that she needs to eat breakfast. Katarina dresses up and realizes that her clothes looks like a cute outfit form an RPG. After being greeted by her father and being given a simple japanese breakfast (which made a bit emotional), Miri scolds her and tells her to hurry since she and Keith needs to check up on a few things before they leave. When Katarina asks where they are going, Luigi tells her that she and Keith are headed on a journey to become heroes and defeat the demon lord. She is told that they are the two chosen from the village as representatives. Katarina, being confused about being in an RPG-like world instead of an otome-line one, realizes that she is in a dream and is excited to play a heroine role in the fight against the monsters. Katarina is awoken by Keith during their carriage ride, and told that they were at the castle. Despite being representatives of their village, they still need to be selected as a true hero. She asks on how they were selected as the representative, and Keith tells her that it's done by lottery. Katarina admires the RPG-style outfits of everyone in the crowd, before the high priest arrives and announces the details of the selection.

Everyone is divided into small groups and left to face monsters in order to assess their abilities. Katarina, who has never fought before, is scared of the task because she's never fought monster before. Unlike Keith who looked like a knight, her weapon is a hoe. She asks the officiate beside her if she can just eliminate herself and watch from the side, to which Keith sighs in disbeliefs and the man giggles at the confession. As the officiate yelled at the sight of a world, everyone got ready for battle. While Katarina admired the fight from afar, she realized that something else was growling besides the wolf. Timeskip to hours later, Katarina was selected as a hero with the title of "Monster Tamer", and the officiate reveals himself to be Prince Geordo and asks to be a part of her party. As Katarina and her party march on to face the demon king, they encounter a witch, who reveals herself to be Miri with a book of manners. Katarina then wakes up from the dream.

Volume 4 - Dreamland Genderbender

Katarina wakes up to the sight of a male butler waking her up to tell her that she is late for school. When she asks him who he is, he says that he is Anne, Katarina's faithful butler. Katarina realizes that Anne is a man, and that she isn't a she, but a HE! Katarina freaks out at the fact that he is a man and realizes that there is something on his waist that definitely shouldn't be there. Before Katarina could ponder about it for too long, Anne helps him prepare for school. He gets greeted by Keith, and he becomes overwhelmed by how cute (and yet somehow very Keith-looking) she was. When they got to the Academy, Katarina is greeted by Geordo and Alan, who are princesses instead of princes. Due to the fact that everyone's names were still the same despite being gender-switched, she realizes she's in a dream and plays along. Mary greets Katarina good morning, and Katarina notes how gentlemanly and dashing he looked. Katarina was then greeted by Nicol, whose smile was so lovely it made everyone blush. As she pondered on whether the female Nicol was more charming than her male counterpart, Sophia greets Katarina.

On their way to class, Katarina looks into a window and feels bad about how mostly the same he looked despite being a boy. Geordo clings onto his right arm as she tries to lead him to class (emphasizing her chest while doing so, which Katarina notes as being possibly bigger than Mary's), while Keith takes the other arm and gets angry at the princess for her behavior. Katarina is overwhelmed by Keith's adorable height, and lets go of both of them to hug her. Geordo takes a hold of Katarina, vocalizing his jealousy over his touchy-ness with Keith and demands the same treatment because they are engaged and because she is much more attractive than Keith. The argument between Geordo and Keith becomes heated, discussing whether or not a huge chest is much more attractive in a woman. Alan doesn't want to be a part of it, and Nicol stops their discussion as it is embarrassing to hear for the other students. Katarina doesn't know how to react since she is a boy in this situation. When they get to the classroom, they are greeted by Maria, which prompts Katarina to contemplate on what the differences are in the world now that they all swapped genders. When they get to student council room, Katarina compliments Raphael on how small and adorable she looks, bringing back the heated discussion between the girls about chest sizes. Katarina shouts that he has no preference, and then wakes up from the dream.

Volume 5 - Doom Route Kindergarten

Anne introduces herself as a daycare worker at Doom Route Kindergarten, and awaits the arrival of the students. First car arrives with Geordo and Alan, children from a well-off family. Anne is asked to take care of the two, who she nicknames "Sebastian the Butler". Anne notes on how well mannered the two are, and how they are apparently children of a government figure. Next car arrives with Mary, who is a the very feminine fashionista among the children, who loves flowers and fashion. Next car arrives with Nicol and Sophia, who were admired by the staff because their loving parents drop and pick them up from school themselves. Nicol is rumored to be a future seducer by the staff, and Anne notes on how they used to never interact with other children until recently. Next comes a woman on a bike, revealing herself to be Maria's mother who is there to drop Maria off. Despite being the daughter of a normal company employee, Maria was able to enroll into a private kindergarten through a scholarship due to her talent in baking despite her young age. Maria used to have a hard time adjusting to being a school for rich kids, but she had become more enthusiastic about school more recently.

When Maria asked Anne if Katarina will like the treats she made, on cue, another car arrives. Miri angrily drags a half asleep Katarina out of the car, reprimanding her for napping as soon as she finished eating breakfast. Miri apologizes for her daughters rudeness, and Anne replies that she's used to it. Anne tries to wake up Katarina by telling her that Maria made treats for her, which works and jolts Katarina awake. Katarina constantly clings onto Anne and asks her to play with her, while the other children tries to get Katarina to play with them instead. Anne notes how happy she is that Katarina likes her so much, even if she gets glared at by the children as a result. After receiving so much offers of different activities to do, Katarina settles on challenging Alan, which everyone follows them to. Anne runs after them telling them not to climb any trees again. After that, Katarina wakes up from the dream.

Volume 6 - Magical★Girl Flag Breakers

I already made an attempt to translate this chapter, since Manga Volume 6 has yet to come out in english, so I suggest reading it! I'll still summarize it though I guess

Katarina is on her way to school, running with a cucumber in her mouth, until she accidentally bumps into what looks like a small doll. The doll talks back to her, making her realize that it is sentient. Katarina and the doll, who reveals himself to be Raphael the Spirit, have a quick banter that escalates into a discussions about the nature of spirits and the danger that the planet will soon face. As Raphael finishes his explanation, monsters summoned by the evil organization began to attack in a nearby park. Katarina and Raphael checks it, and finds a giant stuffed bear rampaging. Katarina attempts to flee, but Raphael asks her to help him. In a panic, Katarina says yes, and the two form a contract. Katarina transforms into a magical girl and attempts to fight the monster. Despite being confused, she was able to win, and thus beginning her journey as a magical girl.

Timeskip to a few weeks/months later, Katarina mentions that she had found more magical girls among students in her school which includes Mary from the Gardening Club, Sophia from the Literature Club and Maria from the Student Council. The three were recruited by a spirit named Anne. The four are close friends who walk together to school. During one of their walks, they are interrupted by Geordo, one of the Four Kings of Ruin who are part of the Evil Organization. Mary, Sophia and Maria get angry at him for ruining the moment between the girls, and Geordo calls upon his allies in order to be alone with Katarina. From the sky descends the other members of the Four Kings: Alan, Keith and Nicol. Rather than being excited for battle, the three instead berated Geordo for calling them during their free time. Geordo asks them to fight off the other three girls so that he can be alone with Katarina, but instead they interact with Katarina whom they have already met prior. In the end, Geordo is arguing with Mary and Sophia, Alan and Keith are flushed in the corner at the sight of Katarina, and Nicol and Maria are sharing food (since he dropped his pasta after being summoned by Geordo). Katarina wonders if she really is a magical girl since they haven't actually been fighting whenever they encounter each other, and then wakes up from the dream.

Rereading this now, I may have made these summaries a little too long... I hope this doesn't discourage anyone from reading the Bonus SS yourselves!! Please read them, they are so funny and good!!

Detective Katarina's Office isn't available yet, I might edit this post when that drops.

Thank you for the ask (help my fingers hurt from typing jshdfg)

#mh ask #hamefura #my next life as a villainess #bakarina #destruction flag otome #long post #katarina claes #keith claes #geordo stuart #alan stuart #mary hunt #maria campell #sophia ascart #nicol ascart #anne shelley #raphael wolt

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gleamglows · 3 years

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How about Sirius finding out the reader has a crush on him...and gives her her first kiss? 😘

cigarettes and firewhisky

pairing: sirius/reader

word count: 2.4k

summary: amortentia is no fun to make when you’re partnered up with the person you know it’s going to end up smelling like.

content: fluff, me being bad at writing slughorn, very brief mention of sirius’s family issues, confessions in an empty classroom, kissing but nothing spicy (edit: rereading this i realized i made the reader pretty gender neutral! no pronouns or anything like that :)

you know i had to pull the amortentia trope. this was a cute request, thank you so much! also thank you to my anons who sent in what they thought sirius smelled like, you guys were a lot of help! (except the person who suggested that sirius smells like wet dog. you know who you are.)

This was the worst thing that could possibly happen to you. Surely some higher power was laughing at you from above, taunting you and your dreadful luck.

Your heart was beating a million miles a minute. How on earth did you end up being paired up with Sirius Black of all people?! And - even worse - making the worst potion ever concocted?!

If you weren’t in public you’re sure you’d be letting out a crazed laugh out of pure mania.

So far you’ve been able to dodge all of his attempts at conversation, quickly sending him off to find another ingredient as soon as he got too chatty. You’d hardly made any eye contact at all, and any time he handed you something you were careful not to have his fingertips even slightly graze your own.

In truth, you’ve had an enormous crush on Sirius Black since third year, and it had only gotten worse as the years went by. This meant that by now, you had become a bit of an expert at avoiding him at all costs.

But now it was all ruined. Years of hard work spiraling down the drain all because of fucking Amortentia.

Why couldn’t it have been a simple calming draught? Or a shrinking solution? Hell, you would’ve even preferred to make Slughorn his lunch!

And it’s not as if you can sabotage the potion, either! That would mean Sirius’s grade suffering too. You just couldn’t bring yourself to do it.

There was no way out but to lie about what the potion smells of if he asks. Simple! That way no one finds out - more importantly, that way Sirius doesn’t find out - about your silly little crush. Foolproof. Genius. Inspired-!

“Do you like me?”

“What?!” You jolt as panic overtakes you, snapping your head up to meet Sirius’s eyes.

“Do you like me?” he repeats, smiling slightly. “I can’t help but feel like you hate me, seeing as you haven’t looked at me or talked to me at all.”

Internally, you breathe out a sigh of relief, glad you had misinterpreted the question.

“No! I-” Your voice is much too high, you stop to clear your throat. “I do! I do like you, I um... Sorry! I promise I don’t hate you, I guess I’m just... shy.” You finish your blabbering by looking away, pretending to inspect the fire below your cauldron.

When you raise your gaze again Sirius is still looking at you - observing you as if you’re an interesting puzzle that he can’t quite figure out.

“Um!” you quickly turn your attention to the potion, hoping he does the same. “Nearly done, right? Here.” You hold out the wooden spoon for him to take. “Five more clockwise stirs.”

He looks at the spoon but then folds his hands behind his back. “You do it,” he offers instead.

You purse your lips but nod anyway, bringing the wood up to the cauldron’s opening. The pearlescent liquid shifts under the spoon as it touches the surface, and once it’s fully submerged you take a deep breath and start stirring.

One... Two... Three... Four...

As soon as you finish the fifth stir your nose is assaulted by a suffocating aroma of cigarettes and firewhisky. You quickly step back, coughing and tossing the spoon on the table, but the scent follows you.

That doesn’t smell very appealing! Had you done something wrong? You could have sworn you’d followed the recipe exactly!

But then suddenly the scent changes, rapidly becoming much more welcoming. Cigarettes and firewhisky quickly turns into the undertone to something different... Cinnamon shampoo? But also... cologne, and... You could also catch the faint whiff of a brand new leather jacket.

“I think...” you start, eyes trained on the potion that now has delicate tendrils of steam coming off its surface. “I think we did it.” You laugh a bit in astonishment, proud of the fact that you’d managed to make such an advanced potion.

When you turn your head Sirius is looking at you again, in that infuriating way with his gorgeous eyes and stupid grin. You desperately want to look away but just can’t bring yourself to do so.

“How can you tell?” he asks quietly, and you suddenly feel everything else in the room slip away until it’s just him in front of you.

“I... It-”

“What’s it smell like?”

His low voice puts you in such a trance that for a moment you think you’re about to tell him the truth, but you quickly remember what you’d decided on earlier. Lie.

“Ban-” Bananas? No! “Bal-” Balloons? What would that even mean?! “Bu... bblegum. Bubblegum.” You finally land on, and then give a minuscule wince.

Bubblegum?! Although, you suppose it’s better than balloons...

“Bubblegum?” Sirius repeats, brows furrowed.

“Yep! And is that...? Oh! Firewood!” you continue, pulling lies out of thin air. Sirius’s furrowed brows fade away, and an amused smile starts to form on his features instead.

“And, um... And sun cream! Huh, weird.”

“Bubblegum, firewood, and sun cream?” Sirius lists, as if needing clarification from you.

“Well, I-”

“And look what we have here!” Professor Slughorn’s booming voice is suddenly feet away from the two of you, standing right beside your cauldron. “I do believe we have our first finished brew of Amortentia! Although I can’t say I’m surprised, Mr. Black,” Slughorn beams, giving Sirius a knowing look.

Sirius just shuffles awkwardly.

If Slughorn notices Sirius’s discomfort, he doesn’t show it. Instead, he continues, “You know, your father was an exceptional potion maker. Very talented indeed, and you and your brother seem to be following in his footsteps! Although I must say, young Regulus has been a bit unfocused lately, he-”

“Uh, professor?” you speak up when Sirius flinches at his brother’s name.

Slughorn blinks and then looks at you as if he’s just noticed you were there. “Oh- Yes?”

“So... The potion? Did we do it right?”

“Oh, yes, yes, of course! Full marks!” He waves you off, as if you were being silly for even asking. “And ten points for each of you!” he adds for good measure before strolling off, most likely to go torment some other student with a famous surname.

After that, Sirius doesn’t much seem to be up for talking anymore. He focuses all his attention on cleaning up your station, closing up jars of rose petals and pearl dust. You follow his lead, albeit a bit sluggishly.

A few minutes ago you would’ve been okay with Sirius’s silence - happy, even, if it meant you didn’t have to deal with your little crush. But now you would give anything to have him cheerful and smiling again - even if he looked at you with those annoyingly pretty eyes.

Once class is over you’re quick to duck out of the room, desperately wanting to leave Slughorn and Amortentia and the smell of cigarettes and firewhisky behind you.

It’s all over now, everything went according to plan and you can finally go back to doing what you do best. Secretly pining after Sirius Black from a distance.

It’s safe. It’s what you’re good at.

You’re just about ready to forget about this day entirely when you hear a familiar voice calling your name.

...Maybe you were hearing things.

You speed up your steps but then he calls your name again and you’re forced to slow down, waiting for him to catch up. When he does he gives you another winning smile and your heart does a flip.

“Hey, listen,” he starts, and you listen intently. “Sorry about uh... Just... Thanks.”

You’re a bit taken aback. You’re not sure what you were expecting, but it certainly wasn’t a ‘thank you’.

“I... For what?” you ask, genuinely perplexed, but trying not to sound rude.

“Getting Slughorn to leave,” he clarifies with a grin. “He’s always been the same... I’ve been dealing with that for seven years now.”

There’s laughter in his voice but you can tell it’s a bit frayed at the edges. He’s clearly trying - and failing - to play it off as no big deal.

“Sorry,” you offer lamely. “That doesn’t sound fun.”

It really doesn’t.

You don’t know much about Sirius’s family, but you know enough to understand that he probably doesn’t like to be constantly reminded of them. Sharing their last name and seeing his brother in the halls was probably more than enough.

“It’s fine. And, I didn’t just want to thank you,” he says quickly, realizing that the conversation had gotten gloomy.

“Oh?” you voice with a bit of a nervous smile.

“I wanted to ask what it smelled like. The Amortentia.”

There goes your heart again. A million miles a minute.

“What do you mean?” you ask, laughing a bit. “I told you. Bubblegum and um...”

Shoot! What were the other two?!

“Firewood and sun cream?” Sirius prompts, and you nod frantically.

“Yep! That was it!” you’re quick to blurt out. Unconsciously, you pick up your pace, now traveling at a slight speed walk.

Sirius keeps up easily. “But you’re lying,” he accuses, pointing a finger at you, and you swear you start to sweat. “You started coughing when you finished stirring. What did you smell then?”

“I-! Well-! The bubblegum was very pungent, and I-”

“And it looked to me like you were just naming anything that came to your head. Were you about to say balloons at one point?”

“You know, I don’t appreciate being interrogated like this, and quite frankly I- woah!”

You suddenly find that you’re being pulled somewhere by the elbow, and only when you hear a door close behind you do you realize that Sirius has dragged you into an empty classroom. You don’t even have time to take in your surroundings, because Sirius is asking you again:

“So what did you smell?”

You consider lying again, but he’s staring at you with his big, pretty eyes, just waiting for you to tell the truth and all of a sudden you really, really want to.

You thought - you really thought - that you would be content to just go back to crushing on him from a safe distance, but then the Amortentia had happened and he had looked at you different. He was looking at you differently even now - eyes glittering, listening attentively for your answer. And suddenly pining from a distance doesn’t seem so appealing.

You groan in frustration, bringing both of your hands up to cover your face. You just can’t believe what this boy is doing to you.

“It’s so stupid,” you admit, feeling your cheeks head up beneath your palms.

“It’s not,” he assures you, gently wrapping both his hands around each of your wrists, silently asking you to stop covering your face.

You shake you head. “It is, and if you’re asking then you already know.”

“So humor me.”

You abruptly drop your hands to look up at him and, woah - had he always been that close? He’d definitely gotten a bit closer since you’d closed your eyes.

You let out a shaky breath. “Cigarette smoke... Firewhisky...” you trail off. You mean to keep going, but decide to wait for Sirius’s initial reaction first.

Sirius blinks. “Gross,” he says after a beat, and it startles a laugh out of you.

“Yeah, a bit. I thought we messed it up, but then... Um, it changed.”

You search his features for any signs of discomfort, but find none. In fact, Sirius seems to be basking in every word you tell him.

So you keep going, very quietly, “Cologne and...” Without thinking you bring a hand up to rest delicately on his shoulder. “Leather and... Cinnamon...”

You hand moves of it’s own volition, resting on the junction of Sirius’s shoulder and neck and you stare dazedly at it for a moment. You blink and then realize what you’re doing.

You pull your hand away as if you’ve been burned. “Sorry, I-”

But then Sirius is leaning forward fast and - Merlin, was he about to kiss you?!

You panic for a moment, knowing you have to think quick. Your hand darts up again, this time landing on his collarbone, putting your palm flat up against him and pressing firmly, willing him to stop.

He gets the message and quickly pulls back. “I’m sorry-”

“No!” you blurt out so fast that it sounds more like a squeak. “No, no, it’s not that I don’t... I mean I want to, I do I just...” You screw your eyes shut. “I’ve never kissed anyone.”

“Fuck,” Sirius lets out a laugh.

Your heart sinks as you open your eyes. Was he laughing at you?

“Sorry, I’m not laughing at you,” he clarifies quick, as if reading your mind. “For a second I thought the Amortentia was a big coincidence and you didn’t like me at all.” he smiles, and you realize his laugh was a laugh of relief.

“No! I-!” You groan again and lean against the closed door. Was it confession day or something?! “No, I’ve... I’ve liked you since third year.”

“What about first and second?” he fires back quick, grinning stupidly.

You don’t miss a beat. “I was scared of you, then. You were too loud.”

He barks out a laugh and you suddenly feel the urge to look away, feeling as if you’re intruding. And then you remember you’re not. It’s just you and Sirius here. So many times you’d seen that laugh from a distance, across a crowded Great Hall but now it was just for you.

Sirius speaks up once his laughter dies down. “Look, you don’t have to-”

“No, I want to-”

“I don’t wanna make you uncomfortable-”

“You haven’t! I just-”

“We can just go to class-”

“Sirius!” you say sharply, and he looks at you with wide eyes. “Kiss me. Please,” you say with a laugh, wanting him to shut up already.

He grins and then wastes no time in leaning forward, taking your face in his hands and pressing his lips to yours. You smell it again - cinnamon shampoo, cologne, new leather, and - very faintly - cigarettes and firewhisky.

You melt into the kiss, bringing you hands up to rest at the nape of his neck, idly playing with the strands of hair you find. It’s awkward at first, but you try your best to relax into it, following Sirius’s lead and just doing whatever comes naturally.

He pulls away and you slowly blink your eyes back open, willing yourself out of the trance Sirius’s lips had just put you in.

“Fast learner,” he whispers, smiling, and you laugh.

“We should get to class...” you suggest halfheartedly, not stepping away or making any move to leave.

“Yeah,” Sirius agrees, tucking a strand of your hair behind your ear. “Probably...”

You both look at each other for a few beats, but then you each break into a smile.

And he kisses you again.

taglist <3 // @isxfisticated @l-adysansa @tomshollandz

#requests #sirius black fluff #sirius black x reader #sirius black

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blarrghe · 2 years

Text

Writing Year in Review

thank you to @aymayzing @barbex @fandomn00blr and other mutuals who did these with the catch-all tag. Tagging @onionjuggler @midnightprelude @cciarants @whataboutbugs-art @inquisitoracorn and of course, anyone who wants to do it :)

Wrote: Oh, well over 200K words. I didn't count, but Matchsies alone is at 200,756 and I've written some other stuff too. Went a bit crazy this year.

New things I tried: A spiralling longfic, writing more sex, some DA drunk writing challenges (though not nearly as many as I'd hoped).

Fic I spent the most time on: Matchsies.......

Fic I spent the least time: Other than a few one shots, I guess What If We Were... which was a fun Dorianders thing I was doing from writing prompts that I just kind of haven't thought about in a while.

Favourite thing I wrote: Matchsies is my big baby this year, but I really liked the three little Fenders things I wrote which were Like Raindrops (265 words), Anders Has Several Problems (918) and I Hate You (and your little cat, too) (3985)

Favourite thing I read: Underneath the Bough by @midnightprelude and @oftachancer and Overboard by @onionjuggler are the two fics I'm currently following, they're both very good!

Writing goals for next year: Maybe I'll finish Matchsies?! I had set the goal to complete more short things and I guess I did write a couple one shots. I’d like to write a more reasonably sized chaptered thing (like maybe I can keep one under 50k??), and I want to fill some of the great prompts sitting in my inbox...

Some other stray thoughts: a bunch of people tagged me in these things, each with a different format, so I’m just gonna dump my other end of year comments here.

Speaking of comments - holy hell, comments!! Matchsies did pretty well and is my most commented and most kudos’d fic by far, and even before I started that I was getting a bit of really nice feedback for Twelve Nights, which I finished early in the year. I want to extend just the biggest, most grateful thank you to everyone who has ever left a comment on any of my work, whether it was just a nice thought in the tags, a sweet ask, or a comment over on AO3. Every single one encourages me like nothing else, I reread them all the time, and while all that is great and makes my ego happy, it has also allowed me to make some new friends! (Hello to @gaysolavellan @whataboutbugs-art @cciarants @aymayzing and @elvhenfaer all of you are super cool and I’m so glad I got to talking with you guys this year!) On top of that, it also just lets me know what’s working in my writing, and it’s so exciting to be able to connect with people over these stories, characters, and sometimes the deep dark emotional experiences. I started posting fic when the pandemic started because I knew I would go insane if I didn’t find some kind of online community, and here I am finding it! Forever grateful to the people who are out there discussing stuff on Tumblr and Discord too, but the fact that a few of you actually take the time to give consideration and thoughtful comments to MY words and insights is just. Yeah. All warm and fuzzy. In 2022 I hope to read a bit more and definitely comment whenever I can, let’s all be friends :3

Characters: Dorian and Taren are my most written characters, of course, and I’m really glad to be part of a fandom with this fun and active OC culture. The fact that some people enjoy the perspectives I create both for the existing characters and also for my own is really nice, and I love love love hearing about and seeing the beautiful art of everyone’s OCs. What a cool space. I’m hoping to expand on some of the other original characters who live in my head this year! I’m particularly interested in doing some Warden + Origins crew stuff.

Collabs: Started my first collaborative work with @gaysolavellan and even though I’m writing slow af right now, it’s very fun and I’m super excited to get that done. I think it would be awesome to do more of this kind of teamwork story building in the future, because, again, I just want to nerd out about stories, make dumb jokes, and be friends <3

Sex sex sexy sex: I set out in my Year In Review last year to do a bit more explicit writing and try to find a comfort zone in writing about sex, and it’s been difficult but very fun! I am in constant awe of people who write a lot of straight up smut and kink and all that fun stuff, and while I’m still on the flowery prose and copious feelings end of the spectrum, I’ve definitely upped my game. It’s too bad that tumblr and other parts of the internet can feel so fraught with purity policing and debates about how to explore these topics, but I’m glad I’ve found a space to explore sexuality and creativity and to kind of parse out some stuff through the meta lens of making up steamy soap operas and sharing them with you horny dogs <3

and that leads us into....

Worldbuilding and meta: I say sometimes that i just find it easier to do my meta commentary through in-depth worldbuilding, and as weird as that is it’s true. DA is kind of a mess, but extrapolating from the good bits, expanding on the interesting bits, working out my own interpretations for the shit bits, and so on has been very freeing. I think it has also just helped me become a better writer. I’m not saying my takes are all 1000% correct (but also yes they are) but I do hope these skills will transfer to when I finally get back into original work, and even if not I’ve really enjoyed being able to take to this space to just mess around with the Big Concepts that may or may not be handled well in the source material... Also, it’s cathartic to write stories about this stuff when the world (and sometimes my life) is the way it is. Another big thank you to anyone who’s engaged with me on these subjects, and hey, my inbox is always open!

Happy New Year!!

#writing things #blarghe #year in review 2021

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