“Dumbledore announcing that, unfortunately, Professor Lockhart would be unable to return next year, owing to the fact that he needed to go away and get his memory back. Quite a few teachers joined in the cheering that greeted this news.”

Yea so this is how I decided it happens🌝

have fun w this, sunshine pops x.

Severus; “ARE YOU-”

Y/N; “Fucking.”

Severus; “KIDDING ME?! YOU-”

Y/N; “Fucking.”

Severus; “IDIOT!”

Filius; “…What was that?”

Y/N; “Minerva banned Severus from swearing, so I’m helping him out.”

Hogwarts staff if they weren't wizards.

In muggle clothing, teaching muggle subjects. ♥︎

🎵🎶 Professor Flitwick 🎶🎵

This was a fun illustration! I liked getting to put my own spin on this teacher. The only description in the books was: he’s a tiny wizard. So, I thought about the role he plays in the books. He’s a kind, good teacher who cares about his job and his students. I imagine he chaperones all kinds of student clubs, because he wants students to explore their interests, like a true Ravenclaw :) He conducts the choir and spruces up the castle during holidays. I bet he plays games in the classroom and does thematic spells for holidays, like hollowing pumpkins for Halloween.

For his design I took some inspiration from old English universities and their professors’ attire. With the long robes and tweed suits. I put my own spin on it and made it more formal and magical, with colour and prints. I subconsciously made him a little bit queer-looking, but I really really like that vibe for him. I hope you like it too! I wouldn’t be opposed to a gay professor Flitwick :)

Until the next one! ✨

Sirius: Dinosaurs aren't extinct. I mean, Flitwick is walking in this room.

Minerva: I have a question.

Pomona: Shoot.

Minerva: Is the S or C in scent silent?

Filius: Fuck you, I’m going to be thinking about this all day.

Pomona: Okay well, cent is pronounced the same way as scent so I’m gonna say the S is silent.

Minerva: Okay, but sent is also spelled the same way.

Filius: Google says that the C was added in the late seventeenth century, so I guess the S is silent.

Severus: Plot twist, both the S and the C are silent and the E actually makes the sss sound.

Filius: Severus is not allowed to talk anymore.

*staff meeting*

dumbledore: this year, i learned that time is precious so my new years resolution is to spend more time with you guys.

sprout: awhh 🥹 how sweet

flitwick: how sweet 💕

mcgonagall: that’s nice 🫶🏼

snape: yeah, i actually learned that time is precious too so my resolution is to spend as little time with you all as possible because you drain the ever loving life out of me

Joyous Nightmares - Part 2

PAIRING: Severus Snape x (Professor) Reader

SUMMARY: A year after surviving the Second Wizarding War, Severus Snape begins to have joyous nightmares where he dreams of having a wife and a daughter. These dreams bring him nightmares because he doesn't believe that he'll ever get married or have a family of his own. So what happens when the wife in his dreams is revealed to be you?

Warning: Some angst again, but nothing heavy. 

Part 1 | Part 3

*GIF isn't mine

Severus reads a book resting on his crossed knees. Below him, his now three-year-old daughter plays with her stuffed toys. She drags her niffler across the floor and pretends that it’s searching for her play jewelry and toy galleons. When her niffler finds every item, she extends her hand to where the phoenix is sitting, causing it to fly across the room and into her hands. “Daddy, make it sing, please?” she asks as she tugs on the fabric of her father’s trousers.

“Of course, my Half-Blood Princess.” Slightly bending down, Severus takes his daughter into his arms and settles her onto his lap. He waves his wand over the phoenix’s chest, causing it to play a song that enchants his daughter. 

The front door scrapes open, alerting him to the arrival of his wife. “Hello, my love,” he greets after his wife sneaks up behind him and kisses his cheek. 

Right after he awakes, Severus places the palm of his hand on the cheek that his dream wife kissed. Never before has he been physical with her in any way, though he enjoys that one kiss from her. It’s almost impossible to wipe the feeling of her plump, soft lips on his cheek from his mind. 

After failing to drift off for an hour, Severus gives up and works on brewing a new batch of potions that will allow him dreamless sleep. He started brewing them shortly after his first nightmare with his daughter, but he still has these joyous nightmares since he can’t brew enough for each night. As he waits for the cauldron to simmer, he brushes his fingers against his cheek again. 

He heads to the Great Hall in time for breakfast. You quickly glance at him after he sits beside you, and immediately pour him a coffee. “Are you sure that you’re feeling all right? You’ve looked awful lately.”

“Thank you for pointing that out,” he drawls, earning a chuckle from you. Severus rarely tells an actual joke, but he likes hearing you laugh. At the last Christmas party, he told some joke that made you laugh harder than he ever heard before. He can’t remember the joke he told, but he remembers how that night, he replayed the moment when you playfully smacked his shoulder in response to the joke. 

“Maybe the Hogsmeade visit today will make you feel better,” you point out. Severus suddenly remembers how the third- to seventh-year students will venture into the village. He's always thought that setting these dunderheads loose in a public place is a bad idea.

“I do not plan to go,” he replies, which earns an exaggerated gasp from you. “Witnessing the students ransacking Hogsmeade brings me no pleasure.”

“How can you not?” you dramatically ask him. “Maybe you’ll come if I join you?”

He turns over the offer in his mind for a moment before deciding to accept. “Fine, I will meet you in the Entrance Hall.”

“Fantastic!” He enjoys the way you beam at him. 

Severus stops by his chambers to change into something more cozy (and of course, all black) for the winter weather. He wraps a fluffy black scarf you gave him around his neck and shoulders and heads out. 

He observes your outfit as you wave students out of the Entrance Hall. Your coat and dress show your figure nicely, and your scarf compliments your eyes. He catches your eye when you turn around, so he lifts his hand in a feeble wave. “I like your scarf,” you jokingly compliment as you head out together. 

“Thank you.” On your way to the village, you discuss your ideas for the outing. You agree to stop by a bookstore, then go to the Three Broomsticks for a drink. Colorful, twinkling lights and pine trees line the path to Hogsmeade. Silver and golden stars hang from the ceilings in the bookstore, and you and Severus separate to look for different items. 

Peacock and pheasant feather quills line the shelves, though Severus chooses two quills with an eagle feather. From a gap in the shelves, he notices a small child looking for picture books with his parents. He’s entranced as he watches the little boy show a book to his mother, who agrees to buy it for him. His father scoops the child up and the three of them head for the counter together, reminding Severus of his dreams with his small daughter. 

He doesn’t realize he’s staring until you tap him on the shoulder and ask, “Ready to check out?” He jumps at your touch, earning a quizzical look from you, but he nods and you buy two books while he buys the quills. 

You order a Butterbeer and Severus orders a tea with a shot of Firewhisky. When you reach a table near the back, he expects you to sit across from him. Instead, you sit next to him, and close to him at that. A little too close for what is appropriate between two friends.

“What’s on your mind?” you ask, brushing a strand of your hair behind your ear and taking a sip of your Butterbeer. 

“Nothing of importance. I am merely thinking about how there is not nearly enough Firewhisky in this tea,” he lies. In reality, he’s thinking about how if he stood up, his leg would brush against yours. 

“It’s not strong, but you can have a sip of my Butterbeer if you want.” You swish the drink around in your hand before turning to look at him. Your usual cheeriness has faded away to a serious look. “Severus, I’ve been worried about you. You look… more miserable than usual and you look like you hardly get any sleep. Is something wrong?”

Minerva has also noticed that something is off with him. Instead of pulling him aside to talk things through, she gives him sympathetic looks in the staffroom and reduces the number of days that he's assigned to patrol the corridors. You’ve been more open about your concern and Severus finds it, for lack of a better word, sweet. But he doesn’t want to talk about his joyous nightmares with anyone; he doesn’t deserve anyone’s sympathy or gentle looks. You’d probably laugh at him if he told you how he dreamt of a family of his own. 

“I… I am fine.” You quirk your eyebrow at him and he continues, “Finding the ability to sleep after the war is not hard to believe, is it not?”

You nod and soften a little, but you still look wary. “I was thinking that if you had more company, you’d feel better. With me, for example.” You shift your seat even closer to him and your legs are nearly brushing against each other. Severus looks down and becomes flustered. 

You place your hand on his arm as you continue. “After each day’s classes, we can go down to the Black Lake. On the weekends, maybe we can visit Hogsmeade again. What do you think?” 

“I… I believe…” Severus feels like a fool as he trips over his words. All he can think about is your hand on his arm and how you’re close enough to feel your breath and smell your perfume. 

He’s disappointed when you withdraw your hand from him and straighten in your seat until he notices that Professors McGonagall and Flitwick are heading for your table. “Do you mind if we sit with you?” Filius asks. 

“Not at all,” you reply and smile, but Severus notes a hint of impatience in your tone. He can't help but share your feelings of impatience.

After taking a sip of her drink, Minerva leans in and says, “I don’t know about you all, but I am delighted that the Christmas holidays are near.” She drones on about her plans, the decorations she has already put up, and her favorite Christmas treats. You enthusiastically talk about the holidays with Minerva and Filius, and sometimes give a reassuring smile to Severus while the others talk. 

Severus, on the other hand, barely participates in the conversation except for the appropriate nod and grunt here and there. All his mind can focus on is how close you were with him and why in the wizarding world you would offer to spend so much time with him. 

Thankfully (for Severus, at least), the conversation doesn’t carry on for much longer and the four of you head outside. You’re walking along the path towards Honeydukes when suddenly, you hear children screaming with delight. Snowballs fly between the two sides of the path as the children run around and duck for cover behind trees and buildings. 

Severus whips his wand out and suspends all the snowballs in midair. They fall glumly to the ground, causing the children to stop laughing and screaming at once. “What do you think you are doing?” he asks, enunciating each word. Behind him, you and Minerva are exchanging looks and holding back giggles. 

“Professor Snape, we were uhh…” a third-year Hufflepuff attempts to explain. “We were having a snowball fight.” 

“Obviously,” Severus drawls. “Five points from each of you for endangering yourselves and the residents of Hogsmeade with your reckless behavior.” When they only stare at him, he continues, “Direct yourselves back to Hogwarts before I deduct more points.” 

He turns back to find only you standing there. The other two professors left for a tea shop, so you and Severus resume your walk together. You lean into him and say, “You know, they were just having fun.”

“You would define a snowball fight as fun?” he retorts. 

You roll your eyes at him. “That seems like something that someone who hasn’t been in a snowball fight before would say. What did you do for fun during the winter as a child?”

“If you truly wish to know, I occasionally made snowmen and drank tea by the fireplace,” he explains. He stops short when he notices that you’ve left his side. 

Something hits him on his right shoulder, and he has to brush his hand over his shoulder to realize that it’s snow. He whips his head around to see you forming another snowball in your hands. You fire the snowball straight at his chest, but he uses his wand to suspend it in midair. “What are you doing?”

“Having some fun! Stop using your wand!” you shout before rolling another snowball. 

Severus has a reputation to keep up and he has no time to behave like an immature five-year-old. Quite frankly, your behavior as a professor is far from appropriate. But you look so beautiful with a large grin on your face as you raise your arm to take your aim, and the snow is falling perfectly on your hair. He looks around to make sure no students or staff are present before he allows himself to indulge in a snowball fight with you. 

Ducking out of the way, he crouches on the snowy ground and forms a snowball of his own. He sends it flying towards you and it hits you powerfully in the chest, knocking you to the ground with a little shriek. Concerned, Severus stands up to make sure you’re okay until you jump back up and throw a snowball squarely at his abdomen. 

“You insolent little-” He’s cut off when another snowball comes at him and you run away laughing. Residents of Hogsmeade watch Severus chase you into a side street. Both of you continue pelting snowballs at each other until a door opens behind you and Minerva emerges. Severus’s snowball hits the doorframe beside her and she stands there partly shocked, partly amused. 

“I don’t believe that two of my best professors should be behaving like immature first-years,” she chides. 

Blood rushes to your faces and you give her a sheepish smile. “Perhaps we would be better than first-years if Severus improved his aim.” You flash him a wicked smile when he glares at you. 

“Perhaps Filius and I should escort you back to the castle before you engage in more childish behaviors,” Minerva scolds even though there is a hint of amusement in her voice. 

More snow falls as the professors round students up to return to Hogwarts. Enchanted lights and stars twinkle as you and Severus shepherd the students along the path back to the school. You don’t talk much since you’re watching a family of deer passing by. 

A halo surrounds your head because of the golden lights wrapped around the pine trees. Severus pays no attention to the deer, instead admiring how angelic you look with the halo around you. His skin burns and he looks away when you catch him looking at you, but you only flash him a smile. 

“Think about my offer,” you tell him after you drop off the students and walk away from him towards your quarters. 

Oh, he’ll be thinking about your offer tonight in his dreams. 

For Unofficial Snapetober 2023 prompt "Bats"

Isn't it so funny when the colleagues are all talked into a "Professor Snape Costume Contest" without you? Isn't it hilarious how everyone has the exact same brilliant idea for the "Professor Snape Costume Contest"? Severus needed to find a way to wipe that smug grin and ugly mustache off of Remus Lupin's face and to wipe his own memory of Albus- who had a sufficient height advantage to make things even more awkward- in that uncomfortably embellished Bat-suit

(Okay, yes, Batman and Robin with George Clooney came out in 1997, but PoA is the time travel book so let's just hand wave temporal anomalies away)

*When Harry "dies" he recieves a third option, which is go back in time and he does that. And when is time for old Voldy to return-* Harry: Cedric, I would love if you could win this shit, but I have to take this fucking thing alone or else you'll die. I'm not even kidding. Been there, done that and it wasn't fun for either of us. Cedric: Cedric: So, you used a Time Turner? Harry: Nah, I died at 17 and recieved 3 options; move on, go back to the moment I died or go back in time...I chose go back in time, sounded more fun and I could fix some shit up. Cedric: Cedric: Okay, I'll just send the red sparks for me then...Good luck, I guess? Harry: I'll need that. *In the graveyard, after Voldy has a body* Harry: *Stuns every Death Eater* Harry: It's just me and you now, Tommy. Voldemort: What the actual fuck? How did you break free?! Harry: That's something that should be between me and Merlin. Harry: And oh, btw? I know about the Horcruxes and I destroyed almost all of them. Harry, putting his own wand on his head: Avada Kedavra. Voldemort: Voldemort, to Harry: Potter? Voldemort, to his Death Eaters: What the fuck just happened? And why are you all useless bitches still stunned if he just committed suicide?! Harry: Because I'm not dead, motherkiller! Voldemort: What the fuck?! Harry: Now you can be killed, but for now I'm just gonna stun you and go back to Hogwarts with you and your little fucked up minions. We'll see from there. *Back to Hogwarts* Harry: I'm back with a few gifts, motherfuckers! The students: The professors: The parents: Fudge: Are those —? Harry, pointing to the DEs: Death Eaters, yes. Harry, pointing to Voldemort: And that's Tommy. Harry, pointing to Pettigrew: Oh and that's the traitor, the one who really got my parents murdered by Tommy, Peter Pettigrew. Fudge: Tommy? Harry: Yeah. Harry, seeing everyone's confusion: Oh, sorry, my bad! I forgot that not everyone knows Voldemort's real name... Harry, pointing to Voldemort: That's Voldemort. Everyone: *Screaming, panicking, fainting, throwing up* Harry: Oh, come on! He's fucking stunned and I could just kill him right now infront of everyone if that makes you all feel better! Fudge: Please, do that. I, as Minister of Magic, give Harry Potter a special permission to use a Unforgivable Curse to kill the one know as Lord V-Voldemort. Harry: Fine. Harry, pointing his wand to Voldemort: I guess it's bye forever now, Tommy. See you never. Avada Kedavra. Everyone: *Relief sighs* Moody/Crouch Jr: NOOOOOO! MY MASTER! Harry: Oh, forgot about you, honestly. That's not Alastor Moody, guys! That's actually Barty Crouch Jr on Polyjuice! Snape: And how do you know that? Harry: I just know. If you don't believe me you can wait until the effect of the potion is gone. Snape: Oh, we will. Harry: Okay, but can I please go to sleep then? I'm fucking tired. Dumbledore: Of course you can, my boy. Harry: Please, grandpa Dumbles, I'm not biologically yours, so don't call me that. Dumbledore: Snape: McGonagall: Flitwick: Sprout: Hermione: *facepalms* Hermione, grabbing Harry: Ron and I will take Harry away now, everyone! He's clearly exhausted... *Gryffindor common room, after Ron & Hermione dropped Harry into the boys dormitory* Ron: Hermione? Hermione: Uh? Ron: Did Harry really called Dumbledore 'Grandpa Dumbles' and got away with it? Hermione: Pretty much, yeah.

@wolfstarmicrofic March 12 – prompt 12: Bombardo – word count 682

Bombardo - Creates an explosion

James was worried. Not because they had run into Snape and his minions in an empty corridor, or because they were now dueling with all the knowledge of their Sixth Year spells, or because all of that could lose them so many points Gryffindor would be out of the House Cup race until the year 2000. No, James was worried because Snape was hurling insults at Sirius while he was dueling against him and Remus. None of them ever listened to what Snape said usually, but James had just gotten his friends back on a talking basis after the awful event of the previous year and their relationship was so fragile anything could shatter it again. Snivellus, who was not stupid, as much as it pained James to admit it, had picked up on that and was trying to use it to his advantage.

“Nice one Black, did your mum teach you that? Oh, wait!” Snape shouted as he dodged Sirius’s spell.

James parried the spell Mulciber had aimed at him as he watched Remus try to disarm Snape to no avail.

“Well, despite all she might still be proud of how her son behaved, won’t you agree, Lupin?”

James moved Peter away from Avery’s range and cast a stupefy, hoping it would stun the two goons enough for him to deal with Snape himself.

“Look at him now,” Snape sneered. “Looking at you with sad dog eyes, all worried you’ll stop talking to him again.”

Mulciber was down, but Avery was raising his wand again and James had to focus away from where Sirius was stumbling back, a stricken look on his face while Remus stood motionless, looking at Snape. With one look to Peter, they managed to coordinate their spell and got Avery, sending him on the floor by Mulciber’s side. As they both whirled around, ready to help their friends, Snape laughed.

“Oh, we all saw that,” he said. “The Marauders broken up and Lupin wandering the castle with the girls in your year or even with the less likely group you’d think he would like! What was worse, Black? Seeing him with girls or seeing him with your own brother?”

Sirius’s face was crumbling, his wand now pointing at the floor. Rage filling his stomach, James made to jump forward but a hand on his arm stopped him.

“Pete, what-”

“BOMBARDO!”

The explosion almost made him fold in two, and when he looked up again Remus was standing wand in hand pointed at a knocked out Snape on the floor and a half-destroyed wall behind him.

“Moony?”

Sirius’s voice was little more than a whisper. James, arm still in Peter’s grip, watched Remus turn around to face Sirius, his eyes dark. And then Remus marched up to Sirius, all but crushing him against the nearest wall, kissing him hungrily.

“No one,” Remus growled after a while, his hands framing Sirius’s bewildered face. “No one can say things like that about you and not face the consequences.”

“Moony…” Sirius whispered before grabbing Remus’s hair and pulling him into another searing kiss.

James smiled, ignoring Peter who was poking his side. His friends were okay. Well, more than okay, judging by the way their hands had started roaming on each other. Peter was poking him again, but he just felt happy and so relieved and almost (almost) not uncomfortable at the way Sirius was currently moaning. Peter poked him again.

“What?” James finally looked at him.

Peter stared back, moving his arm to take all the scene, three knocked out students and one knocked down wall, in.

“Get the bloody cloak out, Prongs” he hissed. “We’ll get expelled for this!”

“Shit,” James muttered.

The cloak was fished out of his pocket and the happy couple covered and ushered away along with Wormtail riding on James’s shoulder just as Professors Flitwick and McGonagall rounded the corner.

“Oh dear, what do you think happened here, Minerva?” Professor Flitwick’s squeal echoed down the corridor as the Marauders made their hasty retreat.

“Whatever it was, they probably deserved it,” Professor McGonagall’s exasperated voice answered.

Idea that I fully believe in even though I have zero evidence to support it, is that Hogwarts teachers were huge gossips (especially McGonagall and Flitwick) when it came to students’ lives.

Y/N; "How's Professor Snape to work with?"

Flitwick; "What have you heard? That Death Eaters would rather confess than be interrogated by him? That his steely gaze can cool a room by five degrees? That he can only be killed with a stake, like a vampire?"

Sprout; "They're all true, except for the stake part. It might give him indigestion or heartburn, but I don't think it'd kill him."

The heads of house have been asked to dress up. Some kind of founders celebration day? ♡