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galaticrow546 · 3 years

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Breaking news: local artist finally finishes another fic he started and actually tried his best ( also breaking news: i actually write fics, i just dont finish many of them :') )

Anyways here is a little thing i wrote ( quite badly but i tried ) about the Idea of "Dream is small but he still get to keep his memories"

Its so hard to edit the story on Tumblr mobile what ;-;-

Btw i forgot mostly of what happened in OSD so It might be a little strange sorry-

Anyways, OSD belongs to @calcium-cat

Pain, thats all Dream felt for a moment, he twisted and shifted, trying to make the pain go away, even If It was for a while, It was also really dark too, he has no Idea what Night made him drink, but he doesnt feel good.

He felt panic as he noticed his conscience slipping away, as he panicked around, he felt a huge pain going through his entire body as he fainted.

…

After moments, he woke up again, as he slowly got up, he kept hissing at the pain that still jolted through his entire body:

-"Ugh, this sucks" thought the little guardian, "I wonder what Night gave me", as he thought, he opened his eyes slowly and blinked a few times before brushing his hands on his face to try and stir himself more awake, but he swears his hands felt...different.

As he opened his eyes, he took a glimpse at his hands, his tiny gloved hands looked smaller than usual, he turned around slowly to find his oversized clothes laying around him, and the clothes he was wearing weirdly looked like the clothes he wore when he was younger, as the realization crept in, Dream slowly realized what just happened, as panic began to grow inside him, he nervously touched his own hand and face while searching for a mirror.

It didnt take long before he found a small, partially broken mirror laying around the room he was in:

-"...It's becoming increasily obvious...I can deny It no longer…"

And, with a tired and defeated breath, Dream spurted out:

-"I am small"

Dream sat back while crossing his arms, how on earth would he even survive here with this size? he needed to come up with a solution fast, before anyone dangerous come-

*click*

Dream's eyes widen at the sound of the door being opened, as he panicked inside, he quickly jumped somewhere to hide, and for now, he needed to be careful to not be spotted.

-"Ugh, now to see how Dream is-"

Night paused, looking at the clothes laying around, It was silent, too silent, he walked over and grabbed a fistfull of Dream's present cape as he began searching for any trace of Dream, but his expression slowly began changing from a calm and neutral face to a worried and panicked one, he moved on from the clothes and began to search around the room, Dream cant be dead right? It was only a magic repressor he gave him after all.

Dream quietly watched from afar, and with a determined face, began to crept closer to Nightmare, ready to jump out and hopefully succeed to escape, a moment passed before Night got a surprise attack from a screaming skeleton toddler, he climbed Night in a rush while he was trying to get Dream out with force, and eventually, the guardian was caught by one of Nightmare's tentacles, as the cyan eye began analizing him, Dream tried to angrily break out of the tentacle's grasp, constantly trying to bite and punch It, It was quickly getting tiring.

Night watched the toddler scream and struggle silently, his face with an serious expression, Dream quickly looked at him angrily and tiredly as he spoke out:

-"Night...I will..ugh...I will break free, let...let me go"

Night listened silently and looked to the side like he was thinking, and with a wide grin, Night answered Dream's request:

-"...no"

Dream gave a tired sigh at the response as the silence between them remained, well, until a particular oreo came in the room in a rush:

-"Night are you ok? I heard screaming-"

Cross paused and stared at the scene, Night holding a toddler that looked like Dream on his tentacles and the toddler looking defeated and tired, It also looked so dirty too, Cross looked at Night silently and confused, Night sighed as he started:

-"Cross, believe It or not, this is Dream...yeah, i know its confusing, and i dont exactly know what happened to him, but trust me, its him"

The toddler tiredly looked up at the ex-royal guard, and shot him a tired but "ready-to-attack" glare, he knew he couldnt actually do much, but he could at least try.

Cross quickly spoke up:

-"...ok? Soooo you have no Idea what happened to him and he is just a toddler now", Night nodded calmly as the toddler looked seriously to the side, at this point, Dream just wanted to sleep, or at least take a nap, and the tentacle had a really tight grip so struggling was quite Impossible.

Night glared at Dream and gently approached him with a wide grin on his face, as Dream looked at him motherfuckerly:

-"awwww, the little kid right here wants to take a nap?" Said Night mockingly.

"No, i dont, let me go Night" spat Dream rudely.

"Not happening little pal, you're staying here until i decide what to do with you" grinned Night maliciously

Dream stayed silent at Night's response, but still kept glaring angrily at Night.

-"anyways, perhaps we should introduce our new pal here to the rest of the team since It might take a while for us to decide what to do, shall we?"

-"yeah, sure"

As Night walked towards the door, Dream looked at Cross with such a serious look that surprised Cross a little, he didnt expect the toddler to suddenly look at him while he follows Night, Cross glared at Dream back, but this only seemed to make Dream look offended, they both kept "fighting" with shooting each other daring and sometimes offensive looks.

~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~

-"stop hitting me!"

Cross was having a hard time with bathing Dream, it seems that the little guy wouldnt give up so soon, It would be a miracle If he even behaved a little, but everytime Cross tried, Dream kept hitting him as hard as he can, and he also seemed very panicked whenever Cross succesfully held him, and then resorted to squirming and throwing water at him, honestly, Cross just wishes this would end soon.

-"I will not stop fighting!, leave me alone at once foul wench!"

Cross looked at him silently as Dream looked back with equal seriousness, they both stayed in silence until Cross handed him the soap and the sponge, as Cross tiredly got up to leave, Dream whispered at him silently:

-"......thank you"

Cross looked back at him with a questioning look, as Dream seemed to ignore the glare, he silently looked away as he left the bathroom, but not before whispering back:

-"......yeah...no problem"

~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~

Cross was eating his dinner happily, well, until Night requested him to call Dream for dinner, since he didnt come down from his room for a while, Cross lazily walked towards the room Dream was given, and then knocked on the door a few times:

-"Dream? You there buddy? Come eat dinner, hope you like soup"

The bedroom stayed silent, Cross knocked a few more times:

-"ok buddy listen, im not joking, Night is telling me to come and get you to get down for dinner"

A faint shuffling was heard from inside the bedroom, Cross waited a while before deciding to turn around the doorknob and opening the door.

All he saw was a little toddler cuddling to the blanket It was given, It looked rather happy and comfy there, but It quickly opened his eyes to stare at Cross, and in turn, shift to sit on the comfy bed he was on:

-"ah, you have returned, welcome back" greeted Dream tiredly.

Cross stared at him confused, why would he even greet him after all of the chaos that happened today, perhaps he was so tired that he gave up on the thought of attacking him? Well, If thats the case, then at least he wont have to deal with a angry Dream.

Cross approached Dream slowly and quite cautiously, as Dream looked at him boredly, the blanket he was holding was quite fluffy though.

-"um, ok so, Night told me to get you to come down for dinner, now answer me, do you like soup?"

-"...hmmmm yeah sure, soup is nice"

-"uh right"

The silence was quite awkward, Dream seemed like he calmed down, but there was still a bit of cautiousness in him, seems like they werent getting his trust so soon.

-"...so, will you come down?"

Dream looks down, thinking carefully and silently before a grumbling sound coming from his stomach (???) broke the silence, Dream got spooked by the sudden sound and made a scared squeak because of It.

As Dream took some time to calm down from the sudden spook, he slowly stared at Cross:

-"...fine, I'll come down"

-"good, follow me, or dont, its your choice"

As Cross made his way to the door, Dream quickly got down from the bed and let go of the blanket he was holding at the entire conversation, following after Cross silently.

#toddler Dream #OSD #Nightmare sans #Cross sans #haha tiny bastard man is even more tiny #btw i wrote this as i am watching a deltarune chapter 2 stream and i decided to try and write something #keyword - tried #tumblr mobile kinda sucks to edit but eh #writing #my writing

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dork-empress · 3 years

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Singing In The Dead Of Night Ch 2

Harley and Barman set up a playdate for their wards.

forgive the long post, i'll edit and clean it up when im home. chapter can also be found on my ao3, url in the description.

Harley made it back home, which was actually the manor of some billionaire who only really used the house for tax purposes. Harley had taken it over when Lucy came to live with her, deciding she needed more room, and they quickly changed it to suit their needs.

“Luuuucyyyy, I’m hooooome,” Harley called out to the manor, heading through the living room/gymnasium.

Lucy was balancing on the beam by her hands. “Never heard that one before.” She went into the splits and stayed on one hand.

Harley looked over her form. “Point your toes more...there ya go.” Lucy did as recommended. “I got candy for dinner!” She dumped her stolen lollipops on the table.

“I already ate, Aunt Harley,” she said, “I made extra pasta if you want.” She pointed over to the kitchen, before switching hands and flipping herself over.

“Oh,” Harley said, going over to make a plate, but feeling like ants were crawling in her skin. “You know, you don’t have to call me your aunt when it’s just the two of us,” She said, swirling her fork through the noodles.

Lucy shrugged, “Force of habit. Plus it’s a good idea in general, ya know, in case someone’s secretly listening in or we mess up some other time.”

Harley shrugged her shoulders. “Makes sense,” and it did, but it still kind of hurt. “You can have the lollipops for dessert though. You like cherry?” She tossed her the red candy.

Lucy looked down at the wrapper a second. “Can’t, I’m allergic to the red dye.”

“Oh,” Harley said, silently cursing herself. That was something that mothers should know about their kids, allergies and crap. “Well. Lemon then?”

“Sure!” They traded the lollipops, and Harley sucked on hers between bites of the pasta. Sweet and savory combined, delicious.

Lucy swung her legs as she sat on the beam. “Does...my father have any allergies?”

Harley blinked at her. Did Joker have any allergies? It was hard to say. Even now, Harley didn’t know a lot about the Joker. That’s how he liked it. “Best not to talk about it,” she said instead, “In case of those listening things or whatever.”

Lucy hummed, but didn’t seem satisfied. “Hey,” Harley said, trying to distract her from the ‘dad’ talk, “You wanna go out with me tomorrow?”

Lucy brightened, jumping a bit, “Where are you gonna go?”

“I dunno,” she said, “Go lookin’ for trouble. Let the trouble find me. Punch out a couple people but only if they REALLY deserve it!” And maybe if they only kinda deserved it, Harley thought.

Lucy hummed again, thinking. “I dunno. I think violence often begets further violence, and while it is occasionally necessary, efforts should focus more on the community building and personal improvement area.”

Harley blinked at her. Right, she was a reader, Delia had mentioned that. Not unlike Harley at her age, really, although Harley had focused on psychoanalysis instead of philosophy. “Ah, of course,” she said, “Well, what do you wanna do?”

Lucy thought for a second. “Well, there was this girl I wanted to go inspire to fight her eating disorder.”

“Oh,” Harley said nodding. It was a noble cause, really, but...also seemed really, really boring. “I...sure!” she smiled.

The truth was, when Lucy came out to live with Harley full time, she had really thought they would be a lady dynamic duo, a proper partnership mother/daughter team. But Lucy wasn’t much like Harley. Or, she was but, she was different, a goody two-shoes. Or, a goody tutu. Ha.

More than that, she followed a strange sense of logic that was oddly reminiscent of...Harley didn’t even finish the thought.

“You don’t want to go, do you?” Lucy asked.

“Hmm? Of course I do!” Harley said, “I’d do anything with you sweetheart,” she gave Lucy a wink, then went to the kitchen to hide her facial expression.

She didn’t see that Lucy had followed her until she was directly behind her. “Oh, Jesus!” She said, clutching her heart, “Gotta look out there, sweetie. Almost brained ya!”

“Is Dad like me at all?” she asked, head tilted to the side.

Harley blinked at her. She felt like her bones were shaking inside her skin. “Why would you ask a thing like that?”

Lucy spun a little in place making her tutu swish. “I’ve been reading about him. People think he’s crazy. I mean, he says it. But that’s not what your records say.”

Harley frowned, backing away as though physical distance would get her out of the conversation. “What’re you goin through my records for? What, are you a snoop?”

“They got published after one of your arrests,” Lucy said, “Other people were more interested in the little notes you left in the margins, but--”

“Alright, stop.” Harley said, hand clutching her lollipop stick so tight it might break. “Look, Mr...your father is mean and cruel and manipulative, and nothing like you! He wants to drive other people crazy, and for some people, self included, he succeded. But I grew out of it as best I could and now...you don’t need to worry about him, ok? He ain’t ever gonna know about ya, and he ain’t ever gonna find ya. Got it?”

Lucy hesitated a second and there was something strange in her eyes. Something familiar. “Got it,” she finally said.

Harley lightened, smiling at her. “Why don’t we play a game or somethin? You like Monopoly? I make up my own rules!”

Lucy smiled, “That sounds nice,” she said, all bright again. As they set up the game, Lucy said, “You don’t have to come with me tomorrow, by the way. I can take care of myself.”

“You sure?” Harley asked. Lucy nodded. For the rest of the evening, Harley felt like something was…off.

She slipped the burner phone out of her pocket. She typed, ‘Wanna set up a playdate?’

“She called it a WHAT?!” Damian said, nose wrinkled in disgust.

“Aww,” Tim said, over by the batcave computer, “Little Damian’s got a plaaayydaaate.”

“I will end you, Drake.” Damian snarled, fingers twitching for his sword.

“Enough,” Bruce interrupted the both of them. “Damian, if it helps you can think of it as a mission.”

“I thought I was forbidden from Robin duties for the next two months.” Damian said, arms crossed.

Bruce groaned. “Harley has taken in a ward, her niece Lucy. She has some petty crime charges, but from my recon, she’s not a villain. Harley wants her to spend time with someone her age, and I need someone who will watch over her.”

“Watch out for her, or watch out because of her?” Damian asked, scowling.

“Oooh, good question,” Tim said, still at the computer. “Hey, how come you didn’t set me up with vigilante kids?”

“Because you found them on your own,” Bruce shot back, “Look. Damian, you just have to spend the day with her. Follow her around, help her out as long as it’s not hurting anyone. Don’t let her get killed. Invite Jon if you want.”

“Uggh, Jon’s off world with his Dad,” Damian said.

“Oh right,” Bruce said, massaging his temple. “Why do interdimensional crises have to happen at the worst times?”

“Why is it we need a plural for interdimensional crisis?” Tim asked.

Bruce gave him a side glance to let him know he was coming up on the line that breached from ‘annoying’ to ‘problem Bruce will deal with.’ “Damian…”

“Fine, I’ll do it,” he said, “But I won’t be her friend by you forcing us.”

“Fine.”

They met up with Harley at a neutral location downtown on top of a party goods store. “Hiya Batsy, Hey Bird Boy!”

Despite himself, Damian liked Harley. She was usually of a like mind about which villains did or didn’t deserve to live, but he didn’t tell Batman that. “Harley,” Batman said, “Where’s your niece?”

“Just doin some high-wire practice.” Harley said, “Lucy-goosey!”

From the side of the building, a girl faulted up from where she was hanging on the flagpole. A girl wearing a tutu and white paint. “Nice to meet you, Batman,” Lucy said, “Aunt Harley’s told me….a lot of mixed things.”

“YOU!” Damian said, before he could stop himself, and all three of the others turned to him.

Lucy trotted forward on her tiptoes. “Have we met?” She asked, tilting her head, and looking him up and down.

Damian swallowed. “Uhh….”

“Blackbird!” Lucy said, and swooped him up into a hug, “Oh, I knew you were a Robin, why’d you lie to me?”

“Blackbird, huh?” Batman said, and he couldn’t see, but he knew there was a very pointed eyebrow being raised at him.

Damian, still being swung like a ragdoll by Lucy, tried to gain his balance. “I didn’t...I mean I wasn’t…”

“We’ll talk about this later,” Batman said, “You kids go on, I have something to talk about with Harley.”

“Kids?!” Damian said, offended, especially that he was going to be left out of whatever this conversation was. But in doing so, he left himself vulnerable as Lucy pulled on his cowl to the edge of the building.

“Come on, birdy, whatever color you are. The city awaits!” And she jumped from the roof, grappling on outcroppings to reach the street safely. Damian grumbled, but eventually followed.

Harley looked to Batman, and her face fell. “He’s out there, isn’t he?”

Batman gave one slow nod.

Lucy skipped everywhere. It was very irritating, because it was faster than walking, but slower than running, so hard to keep pace. Also,it was just very perky, which made it hard to sulk.

Lucy claimed she had deliveries to make around town. Something about girls who were bullies in high school and were treating others poorly, but it was only because of the societal pressures that were put on young girls of America and...and thats about where Damian lost interest.

She carried a cartfull of boxes like a damn girlscout, and left them on the girls doors. Damian could have followed in his sleep...except there was something about one of the boxes….

“What’s in that one?” Damian asked as she brought it to the next home.

“Huh?” Lucy said, “Same thing as in all of them, some cookies, a letter, balloons of course and--”

“It’s beeping,” Damian said.

“What?”

Damian didn’t wait any longer, he grabbed the box out of her arms and tossed it as high into the sky as he could, tackling her to the ground. The box then exploded.

Lucy gasped in excitement, clapping her hands together. “Birdy, look at it! It’s fireworks!”

Damian growled, jumping off of her and taking out his sword. “I knew it, I knew you were up to no good.”

Lucy tilted her head. “Whatcha talkin about, Birdy?”

“You--” He pointed to where the box was still smoldering. “You were going to put a BOMB on that girl’s doorstep!”

“I didn’t put that there,” Lucy said, getting up with no care of the sword pointed at her.

“You-” Damian stammered. “What?”

Lucy bent down and picked up a scrap of paper from the ruins. “Change of plans for the evening, Birdy!” Lucy said, “We’re going puzzling!”

She tossed the paper at him and he grabbed it quickly. It read ‘I’ve the tallest of trunks and thickest of stumps, a switch in the breeze, but I’m no tree. What am I?’”

They came quickly to the elephant pasture at the zoo. Damian couldn’t help it, he held out his hand for the elephant. She reached out her trunk and wrapped it around him. He couldn’t help but laugh.

Her baby came forward this time, trotting on new steps. He was already the size of a small horse, but he stole Damian’s heart all the same. He tried to bowl Damian over like a large puppy, and Damian couldn’t help but laugh. “Didn’t know you could laugh, Birdy,” Lucy said, kneeling over a shady patch in the enclosure.

Damian’s scowl returned. “Stop calling me ‘Birdy,’” he said, “You can just say ‘Robin,’ if you want.”

“But aren’t there other Robins?” Lucy said, fiddling with something, “I’d love to call you something unique to you.”

“There’s already a Blackbird, you know.” Damian said, continuing to pet the baby elephant.

“There is?” Lucy asked, “Picking a superhero name is HARD. I’m still trying to get Commedia to stick. You know, like, Commedia del arte? But I’ll end up getting called ‘Tutu girl’ or something if I don’t watch out.”

Damian gently pushed the elephant away, seeing what she was doing. She was hands deep in another box like the one they’d found in her cart. “Careful, it could be another bomb.”

“Fireworks,” Lucy corrected, “and I already diffused it.”

Damian leaned down, looking. She had indeed done so, quite efficiently. “How did you know to do that?”

Lucy smiled, “An uncle of mine taught me. You’ll meet him.” She dug further into the box. “I wouldn’t mind some more fireworks, but I don’t want to scare the elephants.” She pulled out another slip of paper.

“This has all the hallmarks of The Riddler,” Damian said, “We have to be careful. He might have bombs all over the city.”

“Fireworks!” Lucy corrected again, “And, probably. See, we already have the next clue!” She waved the paper and read out “Can you hear me make a sound, only when you are around.”

“Of course you can only hear things when you’re around.” Damian said, frowning.

“But only when someone’s around does it make a...Oh!” Lucy said, jumping to her feet, “An echo! We have to go somewhere there’s an echo!”

Damian sighed, “I have an idea.”

Technically they weren’t IN the Bat cave. They were at a far entrance to it, another end of the cave system. So he wasn’t breaking any rules. “Hey, is that Wayne Manor?” Lucy asked. “I tried to break in there once, but they have some crazy rich person security system.”

“Funny that.” Damian said, trying to seem completely ordinary.

Lucy stood at the edge of the cave and yelled into it. “ECHO!” listening for the echo in return. She skipped into the cave, humming all the way, the sound bouncing off as she went.

“Lucy?” Damian said, following her, “Don’t go too far, there’s all sorts of--” He heard a squeal and rushed forward.

He stopped short, his flashlight falling on Lucy. She waved at him to put it down, squinting. “Look here!” She brushed aside some dirt to find some rusted over metal. “Isn’t it fascinating! This cave system must go on for miles! Maybe people hid treasure there!”

“It’s just the old mining system,” Damian said, truthfully. “It’s all blocked off.”

“That can’t be hard to undo,” Lucy said, intrigued by whatever lay beyond.

Damian grabbed her hand before she could continue. “We have to catch the Riddler. There has to be another package here.”

Lucy sighed, but nodded. She took his arm with the flashlight and swung him around the cave. “Ah! There.”

She took the package and skipped out of the cave. “Careful!” Damian urged. “Come on, just diffuse it.”

“Nope, not these ones.” She tossed the package high in the sky, and Damian saw the fireworks light up.

He felt his phone buzzing, no doubt Tim could hear an explosion out here, not to mention Alfred. They’d come investigating fast enough. He leaped up, grabbing the fallen slip of paper, and grabbed Lucy again to pull her along. He read it quickly and passed it to her as he made his way away. “Even in the city scape, nature comes to take its place.” Lucy read. “It must be the park!”

“No,” Damian said, still pulling her, “I mean, yes, that is the answer to the riddle, but that’s not where we’re going.” He texted the police to inform them of the location of the hidden package so they could diffuse it, and dragged Lucy away.

The original Gotham Ice Cream shop was one of the oldest remaining buildings in Gotham, although was clearly closed for the night.

Damian saw a flash of green from the kitchens and rushed inside, finding none other than the Riddler standing there. “Stand down, Riddler,” Damian said, holding out his sword, “We’ve got you now!”

Riddler snarled, backing into a defensive stance. “Robin! How did you possibly find me?”

Damian smirked, “The beginning of each clue was clearly spelling out your final location. I-C-E. I didn’t need to follow 5 more clues to figure that out.”

Riddler cursed. “Those clues weren’t for you! They were for--!”

Lucy came skipping up to join Damian. “Hi, Uncle Eddy!”

“Lucille!” Riddler said, immediately warming. “I had so many sights around Gotham for you to see, why’d you go skipping to the end?”

Lucy skipped up to him, and Damian was once again left dumbfounded. “My friend Birdy here isn’t much for riddles, I think,” she said, “Although he enjoyed the elephants! And he knew about the mining carts in the caves, I want to explore those later.”

‘Uncle Eddy’ hugged Lucy, and Damian came to his senses, “THIS is your uncle?!”

Lucy shrugged, “I mean, that’s what I call him. I met him when I was visiting Aunt Harley a few years ago.”

“I heard you had moved to Gotham full time,” Riddler said, “I wanted to be sure you saw the sights. But the bat-brats have to ruin everything I suppose.” Riddler glared at him, and he glared right back.

“I don’t-” Damian started, but cut himself off, “You can’t just be leaving BOMBS around the city!”

“Fireworks!” Lucy and Riddler both corrected.

“Whatever! They’re explosive and they’re dangerous!” Damian hated having to be the safety one. It felt wrong.

Riddler rolled his eyes. “He’s just as much a barrel of laughs as the big one.”

“Aw, he’s sweet, really,” Lucy said, coming over to Damian and linking their arms. “Aunt Harley and Batman set us up on our own little playdate.”

“It is NOT!” Damian said, squirming away from her, “It is NOT a playdate.”

“Uncle Eddy, can my friend Birdy have some Ice Cream too?” Lucy asked, ignoring him.

Riddler and Damian glared again. “Fine.” He pushed his own bowl of ice cream towards Damian and went to get his own. “It’s MYSTERY flavor!”

Damian looked at it hesitantly as Lucy sat down to enjoy. Riddler went back to the kitchen. “It’s coconut,” Lucy said, “But Uncle Eddy likes to think it’s a mystery, so I let him.”

Damian frowned at her. “You’re really weird.”

“Thank you!” Lucy said, patting the seat beside her. “Come on, even you had to admit you had fun today.”

Damian thought about the elephants, and skipping around with Lucy, and watching the fireworks at the mouth of the cave, and seeing her all excited about mining carts for some reason. “Fine,” he said, “But it’s NOT a playdate.”

“Alright, alright,” Lucy said, digging into her ice cream. “Just a regular date then.”

“I--” Damian started, his head exploding with so many protests that he ended up just short circuiting. Lucy continued chowing down on ice cream like she didn’t say anything of importance. So, Damian just sat beside her, and ate his own.

#lucy quinzel #damian wayne #batman #harley quinn #dc fanfic

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kumoriyami-xiuzhen · 3 years

Text

Hakuoki Shinkai: Ginsei no Shou - Saito Chapter Four

Well, this is probably my 2nd favourite chapter from Ginsei no Shou... Final edits will be done later as always. Need to go over the punctuation and some of the sentences which were compounded in the translation I used so I also need to review that... though it’s probably going to take a while before i get to the subtitled video for this since my finals are literally next week, with the last one being on friday and im only about 3/5 done with the timing for the first chapter.

Chapter 4 occurs in Edo.

enjoy!

Hakuoki Shinkai: Ginsei no Shou - Saito Chapter Four

Translation by KumoriYami

Twelfth month, third year of Keiou.

The Shinsengumi was very busy following the aftermath of the Battle of Toba Fushimi and other political affairs, and was very busy......

However, in comparison, the current political situation has undergone even greater changes. [check jp mtl. reword later].

The Edo Shogunate which had been provoked by Western vassals, had been unable to completely suppress them, finally accepted the Imperial Restoration Order [check jp mtl].

In name, the shogunate was abolished and a new government was established [reword later].

However, the Shogunate, which had held power for so long, naturally refused to give it up [check jp mtl].

At the end of the third year of Keiou, many soldiers had been stationed in Kyoto and Osaka in order to prevent the Sat-cho's forces/armies/troops from entering the capital.

The Shinsengumi which had been stationed at Toba-Fushimi, also confronted the Sat-cho's forces.

Then, on the third day of the first month, before the atmosphere of the New Year had yet to dissipate——

A single gunshot started the Battle of Toba-Fushimi.

Until now, the Shinsengumi which wielded blades, could have been regarded as invincible.

However against the Sat-cho which with the latest weapons and equipment, they had been unable to make up the gap in performance granted by guns [reword later.].

The warriors fell down one after another before they even stepped into the attack range of a sword, and their dead bodies piled up like a mountain.

Watching how he was no longer able to rely on his battle-honed swordsmanship, could only watch as Kyoto, which he had guarding with all his heart, turned into a sea of flames, I had no idea about what Saito-san had been thinking [reword later].

I had always viewed the Shinsengumi as samurai, and so, their defeat felt like it signified the end to the age of samurai......

I wasn’t able to put this into words, and was only able to watch in silence.

After, in order to avoid pursuers, we decided to retreat to Osaka Castle.

In addition to Amagiri-san, who had been repeatedly fought against.

because I was the target of that male oni——Kazama-san, we ended up being obstructed once again.

The fighting with the Sat-cho forces had ended up [with them] being completely suppressed by the latest firearms [check jp mtl].

Yet even the katana that he had always believed in was unable to resist the strength Kazama-san wielded as an oni......

Even so, Saito-san was like a well-tempered steel blade, completely unyielding——

In order to fulfill his orders to protect me, he drank the Ochimizu, became a rasetsu, and was finally able to drive back Kazama-san.

Afterwards.

We arrived at Osaka Castle, and met up with the rest of the Shinsengumi.

We followed Yoshinobu who retreated to Edo [check jp. pretty sure this is Yoshinobu being mentioned here], and vowed to make a comeback from Edo.

The reason why I was living with the Shinsengumi was originally to find my missing father.

Now, since there wasn't much meaning in doing so, I didn't seem to have a reason to follow them anymore......

After pulling myself together, I took [my] sword [check jp for kodachi] from Saito-san, and decided to follow the Shinsengumi.

This must have been because of being in contact with them all the time , the Shinsengumi had become my home.

First month and a half, Fourth year of Keiou [uh... reword later.].

We finally returned to Edo, and borrowed a hanamoto's residence/mansion [check game for the term they use] to use as our headquarters to regain our strength.

But, it wasn't easy to restructure/reorganize a severely damaged organization.

Kondou-san and Hijikata-san, in order to negotiate with the Shogunate, were attending meetings all day.

Inoue-san and Yamazaki-san had sacrificed their lives, and Okita-san was still recuperating......

The greatest burdens naturally fell onto Saito-san.

After turning into a rasetsu, he would feel unwell from simply being awake during the day, but he still never complained and devoted himself to working all day and night/tirelessly working.

Second month of the Fourth year of Keiou

One day during the second month of the Fourth year of Keiou, when I saw deeply distressed over how Saito-san was working and reluctant to even sleep, the following story occurred.

Second month of the Fourth Year of Keiou

During the first month of the year, the former/old shogunate army, which had been defeated at/in the/during the Battle of Toba-Fushimi, retreated to Edo, was waiting for the opportunity to make a comeback.

The Shinsengumi, who had also returned to Edo, first stayed at a hotel in Shinagawa, then borrowed a hanamoto's residence in Edo to use as their headquarters.

In order to revitalize/restructure the situation [reword later. think that reads oddly], every day was very busy.

About a month after returning to Edo......

Yukimura: Um, I remember that this box should have......

I was in the middle of hastily organizing all sorts of things that had been bought for the/at the new headquarters/I was at the new headquarters and arranging all sorts of things that had been purchased [check jp mtl].

However, I couldn't waste too much time on this.

Because I still had to go shopping, and there were many other things that had to be done——

Yukimura: Ah……!

Because of how flustered I was, I accidently knocked down a pile of luggage.

Yukimura: Ah……

Those things need to be put back/returned to their original positions as soon as possible.

Thinking this, I quickly/hurriedly picked up the luggage. Just then/At this moment, someone opened the door, and a cool/clear/cool and clear [check jp mtl] voice came [echoed].

Saito:……Yukimura.

Yukimura: Ah, Saito-san. I thought you went out, but it turns out you were here [reword later].

Saito: I just returned....... putting that aside, I heard a loud noise just now.

Yukimura: Ah...... I'm sorry, I wasn't careful and knocked some of the luggage down [reword later?]. I'll clean it up right away, so don't worry about it.

Saito: It'll be difficult for you to do this by yourself, so I'll help you.

Shortly after he spoke, he picked up the luggage and returned it to their original positions [reword later].

Yukimura: But, Saito-san, shouldn't you be very busy……？

Saito: I'm not so busy to the point that I don't have time to put these back.

Yukimura:……Thank you, Saito-san.

Shortly after, we finished packing the luggage [thesaurus later].

Saito: Anyway, Yukimura.

Yukimura: Nn, what's wrong/what is it?

Saito: Are you the only one sorting out the luggage here?

Yukimura: Yes. It's because the other warriors have their own work to do. In the past, Inoue-san would help me clean up, but——

After saying that, I quickly stopped myself.

Yukimura:…………I'm sorry.

Saito: No, you don't need to apologise.

Yukimura:…………

Inoue-san and Yamazaki-san, they died during the Battle of Toba Fushimi.

During such normal daily circumstances, to suddenly think of……

It was depressing/I couldn't help but feel depressed [check video].

However Saito-san and the other warriors would never publicly express their grief.

That's why...... I try to not to mention Inoue-san to them as much as possible.

Saito: Anyway, Yukimura. I would like to take you somewhere later....... Do you have anything you need to do?

Yukimura: I was planning to go buy food for dinner after....... I was just thinking about which of the warriors I could go with.

Saito: In that case, I'll go with you. Afterwards, I hope that you can accompany me.

Yukimura: Alright, that's fine, but where are we going?

Saito: Matsumoto-sensei. So I can see the circumstances of the wounded.

Yukimura: Ah, so it was like that....... But, is that okay for you? It's still early.

Having become a rasetsu, Saito-san would feel unwell in the sunlight [check jp mtl 'during the day'?]

But, he still......

Saito: That doesn't matter. Please get ready as soon as possible.

Although I was very worried about him, but...... [check game]

Yukimura:.......I know.

I'm afraid that telling him to rest now, would instead be more painful.

I silently convinced myself, and decided to go with him.

Afterwards, we visited Matsumoto-sensei, confirming the/Matsumoto-sensei to confirm the circumstances of the wounded......

Yukimura: The majority of people seem to have recovered from their injuries, which is good [check jp mtl].

Saito:......Yes, it can be said that this is good luck/blessing despite misfortune. In order to prepare for the next battle with the Sat-cho, it is necessary for as many soldiers to recover from their injuries as soon to regain [their?] combat effectiveness.

Yukimura:......Nn.

Saito: Unfortunately, Souji......

Yukimura:......!

Hearing Okita-san’s name, I froze.

Just now, according to Matsumoto-sensei, Okita-san's seems to have seriously/significantly deteriorated——

In the future/From now on, I'm afraid that/perhaps he will never be able to hold a sword [ever] again.

Saito: The Chief and Vice-Commander hope that they will be able to fight against the Sat-cho again soon, but I do not know if they will be able to fight alongside Souji the day that hope becomes a reality...... [check jp mtl. difficulty with translating]

Yukimura:…………

Even Saito-san, who rarely expresses himself, couldn't help but feel extremely regretful when he thought of never being able to fight alongside Okita-san again.

Shortly after, he shook his head.

Saito:......Sorry, I’ve upset you by saying that. [check jp mtl. Tl is more literally: Sorry, for saying that, hearing that upset you]

Yukimura: No, how could that be…...

Saito: [We’re going] back to headquarters [check jp mtl], there is still work that needs to be done.

Just as Saito-san finished speaking, and was about to move [tl is “to take a step”. Check jp mtl].

Saito: Guh……!

Suddenly, he winced and groaned in pain.

Yukimura: Saito-san!?

I rushed forward to support him.

Saito:......No, you don’t need to worry, I was just feeling dizzy [check game for punctuation].

Yukimura: But......!

After Saito-san turned into a rasetsu, even/just walking in the sunlight would cause pain beyond imagination/would be accompanied by unimaginable pain.

Yukimura: After we return to headquarters, why don't you go rest for a bit? You've recently been busy with work, and don't seem to have enough rest [reword later.].

Saito: There is no time to rest now.

Yukimura: But, if you continue like this……!

Saito: I said that you don’t need to worry. Now, we’re going back to headquarters.

Yukimura:......

From the bottom of my heart, I could not accept Saito-san's words.

But, I also knew that the work he was doing, was something only he could do.

For that reason, I didn't say anything, and returned with him to headquarters.

Following that, it seems that Saito-san seemed to be reluctant to spend any of his time on sleeping/reluctant to even sleep, and buried himself in his work.

It wasn't like visiting the injured soldiers yesterday, or dealing with various trivial matters, such as allocating the necessary supplies for headquarters, would do anything to raise the funds that were needed to pay for the expenses during this period of time, or anything/and so on [check jp mtl. had difficulties with this sentence]..

Additionally, preparing money/funds for new clothes and bedding, the purchase of weapons, preparing medicine, arranging for food ingredients [reword later. check jp mtl. "money for clothes." word i have can be translated to a money-related word or "change" as in 'change of clothes']...... There were a lot of things that needed to be dealt with.

Of course, I also wanted to help as much as possible.

Despite that though, I am unable to completely do everything.

If only he would take a day off for his health......

Yukimura:……?

At this moment, I heard some noise from in front of the entrance.

Those voices, it couldn't be......

I hastily ran over to the entrance.

Opening the doors, standing in front of me were——

Yukimura: Nagakura-san, Harada-san, are you heading out?

Shinpachi:: Nn? Ah, yeah. I was planning on asking/inviting some of the soldiers to something good to eat/to eat something nice, to(/and) cheer them up [reword later].

Yukimura: That's it/That's......

If only doing something like that could encourage/cheer Saito-san up. [check jp mtl. Don’t think “cheer” is appropriate for Saito though that’s an accurate translation. thesaurus later?] .

Seeing how I was unusually lowering my head, Harada-san looked at my face.

Harada: What’s wrong? Did something happen?

Yukimura: Actually......

I told them about what I thought when I went out with Saito-san yesterday. [reword later?]

Harada: A way to cheer up Saito…...

Shinpachi: What can we do about that [though?]? Even if you told him to rest, there's no way he would just obediently do that.

Harada: Yeah. There'd be no choice but to use force to get him to sleep, right? [check jp mtl]

Yukimura: Fo-Force/By, by force?

Shinpachi: Hey hey, you're talking nonsense, Sano. How can a girl compel Saito with brute force? [check jp mtl]

Harada: We also should be helping [check jp mtl], but, it's not good to leave the other warriors to themselves......

Yukimura: The other warriors, are they too busy that they don't have time to rest......?

Shinpachi: Well...... we were ultimately defeated in battle. There are a lot of guys who are constantly accumulating resentment [reword later].

Harada: After all, they're all vigorous youngsters/young people, if they aren't allowed to drink and vent their frustrations, I really don't know what they might do.

Yukimura: That’s…...

Harada: Once we come back, we'll take on/share a portion of Saito-san's work. We can't always leave the entire burden on him/all the responsibilities to him...... right?

Yukimura:......Nn, both of you, thank you.

The two men walked shoulder to shoulder.

Watching their backs, I suddenly got an idea.

Yukimura: Letting them drink sake to vent/express their frustrations......

I didn't know if such a thing would work with /if such a method would be effective for Saito-san.

However, compared to doing nothing....... perhaps it was worth trying.

Thus, later that night.

Yukimura: Saito-san, are you/did you fall asleep?

I asked the question from behind the sliding door. [reword later?]

Saito: Come in, Yukimura.

Yukimura: Yes, excuse/pardon me.

Saito-san still looked too busy to pay attention to me/still looked too busy to me...... [check jp mtl]

Without looking away from the/his desk, he remained focused on writing a letter.

Saito: It's very late, is something wrong? [reword later]

Yukimura: Saito-san, are you busy right now?

Saito: There are still matters that must be completed [reword later]. Western-style training and weapons must be arranged for as quickly as possible.

Yukimura: Then when that is finished, will your work for today be done?

Saito:......?

Saito: No, after that's done, even though that is finished, there's still work that needs to be done and it is best to start sooner——

Turning his head, when he saw me, his expression instantly hardened/froze.

Saito: Yukimura, what is that?

Seeing how speechless he looked, I replied with a smile.

Yukimura: It's sake——I'll wait for you to finish that letter, there will be drinks tonight [check jp mtl. had difficulties with this sentence]! I'll be accompanying you too!

Saito:……What……?

When Saito-san's work finally came to an end......

I hurriedly explained my intentions, and poured the sake into a cup.

Saito:.......What is this/this for. What on earth are you thinking?

Yukimura: The letter's done. You can finish the rest of your work tomorrow.......

Saito: Even if it's not urgent/an emergency, it's better to finish this early.

Yukimura: But, can't you have a drink? It's important to rest properly.

I pushed the cup of sake in towards him/in front/before him.

He hesitated doubtfully for a moment, [but?] he still took the cup.

Saito:…………

But he still didn't drink.

It was difficult for someone to drink by themself, I thought, so I poured myself a cup, and drank it without the slightest hesitation.

Yukimura: Ah...... It's, it's good sake! Saito-san, please [check jp mtl. word i have is "please" but it can also mean 'to ask/invite' or 'request'. maybe change to 'please have some'?]!

Saito-san’s brows furrowed tightly, as if he was thinking for a moment......

Saito:......In the end, what is your purpose? [reword later? i don't like how that reads]

Yukimura: Actually, I——

How should I answer that?

Choices:

[It's to get you drunk] <-

[I just wanted to drink with you]

Yukimura: Because…… it’s to get you drunk.

Presumably it was because my answer was too startling, that Saito-san fell silent/was speechless [probably change to the latter].

Saito: To get me…… drunk? Are you able to drink a lot [tl is more “hold your liquor/have good capacity for drinking. reword later]?

Yukimura: Th-That's......

How was I supposed to say that I almost never drank, but was I being too bold to try and get Saito-san to be drunk? [reword later]

But......

Yukimura: If I don’t do this/If this isn’t done, you’re never going to rest. If you continue like this, you’ll definitely collapse one day. Please, just for tonight, please listen to my request and drink this sake/drink this [check game]!

Saito: Wa-Wait. You're not making any sense. Considering that....... you're not actually drunk, are you?

Yukimura: I'm not drunk! I only had one cup. Rather than me, you should be drinking this, Saito-san! This sake was specially prepared for you!

Saito:......Apparently, you won't let me go if I don't drink [reword later?].

He finally raised the cup of sake to his mouth.

Yukimura: Saito-san, did you drink it......?

Tonight's goal was to get him to rest properly.

If I was the only one that got drunk, then it was meaningless.

While I only had one drink, I wasn't sure if he actually drank anything......

Yukimura: Saito-san...... what do you think of this? [how is it]

Saito: Ah, aah......

Although I felt dizzy, I felt comfortable, like I was soaking in a warm bath.

Yukimura:.......By the way, Saito-san, you always, always...... act recklessly. Do you know how upset I get watching you...... No, you don't know.......

Saito: Even if you say that you are suffering/upset, as a member of the Shinsengumi, I must follow the Vice-Commander's orders.......

Yukimura: Then, when you were fighting against Kazama [check for -san], your entire body was covered in blood...... At that time, I really thought that you were going to die.......

Saito: I, I see....... Sorry.

Yukimura: Since coming to Edo, you've obviously been unwell, but you've been working so hard...... That's why I hoped you would be able to rest, and at least have a drink.

Saito: I understand.

Yukimura:....... Re-Really?

Saito:......Yes, I ended up drinking. But, you drinking in order to get me to drink feels odd....... For forcing yourself to drink to get me to drink, I apologize. [check game]

Yukimura: No......! I don't need you to apologize to me....... I just....... wish that you would cherish your body a bit more......

After that, Saito-san began drinking, and while I didn't know how much time passed......

I was hit by an intense feeling of drowsiness, and I couldn't even sit properly——

I fell onto the tatami like that.

I felt so weak and couldn't get up. [reword later]

If I relax a bit more, I'll probably fall asleep like this.

It was only out of a sense of duty that I wanted Saito-san to rest, and I then opened my mouth to ask a question.

Yukimura: Saito-san...... how are you......? Are you asleep......?

Saito:…………

I heard quiet breathing from the person sleeping beside me.

Yukimura:......That's great......

Although this method was a bit rough [thesaurus?], Saito-san finally slept.

I felt relieved from accomplishing this and I couldn't help but say what was on my mind. [check game]

Yukimura: I.......

Yukiura: I've always been worried about you....... You drank the Ochimizu, and now have a body that loathes the sunlight, and it's my fault...... that you've become a rasetsu.

Saito:…………

Yukimura: But....... if you didn't drink the Ochimizu and become a rasetsu then....... I would no longer be here...... and I would never see you again.......

Saito:…………

Yukimura: So even though it's painful...... even though I feel sorry...... and even though I feel sad...... I still want..... to thank you....... for protecting....... me.

…………

Saito:……………………Are you asleep, Yukimura?

Yukimua:…………

Saito:……Really……to think that you'd talk to yourself if the other person was asleep....... I don't regret drinking the Ochimizu in the slightest. I only made the right choice for my own honour, and to protect you.

Yukimua:…………

Saito:.......But you're worried about this and my body. However when I think about the Shinsengumi's situation, I cannot rest...... Nevertheless/Even so....... I'm very happy for you to have broken into my heart like this. Thank you, Yukimura.

Yukimua:…………

…………

……That night, I dreamt that Saito-san was saying something into my ear [reword later].

His voice, which sounded more gentle than usual, seemed to whisper [reword later].

It sounded so comfortable, so full of affection/care......

I slept like this until the next morning [reword later].

- The End -

*happy sigh*

Well, in kyoka-roku, during one of saito’s char perspectives, he does say that he might have been attracted to Chizuru since they talked in that alley…

#hakuoki #hakuouki #hakuoki game translation #Saito Hajime #Yukimura Chizuru #hakuoki shinkai #Hakuoki Ginsei no Shou #Hakuoki Ginsei no Shou Translation #harada sanosuke #nagakura shinpachi

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franeridart · 3 years

Text

Anon said: Ahh I really love your art, especially the way you present your story telling in the comics!! I smile every time I see them on my timeline haha thanks for making my (and likely many others) day! Wishing you all the best!!

Thank you so much!!!!! Especially glad to hear you think my comics’ storytelling works ;O; it means a lot!

Anon said: your satosugu arts give me life omg it's so beautiful and i love how smitten gojou is in all of them😭❤️ thank you for giving us pleasant escape from the disaster that is canon

AH GOSH thank you!!! Gojo lives all his feelings to the fullest doesn’t he! He’s a lot of fun to think about as happy and in love, he gives of the feeling of a warm hug to me ;; back in high school Geto was more reserved with his feelings, but I think he’d show it in his own very soft ways.....ahhhhh man, I love them ;;

Anon said: Your Satosugu is giving me life and also the fluff i need because HOLY SHIT THOSE CHAPTERS ;-;

I KNOW gege really looked at the old gen and went “enough with these dudes” huh lmao but I’m excited to see how everything is gonna turn out from now on! Esp since having been abandoned by the elders the protags are gonna have at the same time more options and less wiggle room.......... interesting!! Can’t wait!

Anon said: hey hey hey i just found your acc and i'm so invested in it already GDJSKALA I LOVE YOUR ART as a beginner like can't draw a circle beginner i truly admire your work also do you have any tips on what i should do to improve my art? because i'm on the brink of giving up istg cause my progress is just none there's no progress idk what to do like pls help me HAHAHHAHA idk what to watch how to practice what to do nothing absolutely nothing but i'm trying my best to hang on cause whenever i keep seeing artists like you it just makes me hang on and be like just keep going but even though i say that i'm going nowhere still so pls help... - 🍄

Ah man, I’m glad I can make you feel like keeping trying!! I answered an ask like this a while back here and I can’t say I have anything new to say on the matter? I hope it’ll help you! In the end the biggest suggestion I can give you is to try to figure out what it is that you want to draw and just draw it! Even if you don’t know how to, just draw it the way you can! As long as the act of drawing itself makes you happy more than the final result you’ll keep up with it and the improvement will come for sure!

Anon said: your art always brightens my day. thank you for sharing it!

Thank you for liking it!!! ;;O;;

Anon said: Idk anything about jujutsu kaisen (I hope I write it well), but seeing your fanarts tempts me to start watching it 😍😍😍

I hope you’ll like it if you do try it!!!!! It’s not a story for everyone, but it is a great story for its own genre! And the studio animating it is doing a wonderful job of making it a work of art too TT0TT

Anon said: Hi! Don’t mean to bother but I wanted to let you know that the user yslkeii on tik tok has reposted some of your art. It’s the “some of my favorite dilfs” video, I think the thumbnail is a photo of Levi Ackerman. She knows that none of the artists in the vid allow reposts but won’t take it down so I figured I’d let them know

Thanks for letting me know! Sadly, I have literally no clue how to act on this for tik tok orz if they could at least credit................ I’m not even too opposted to having my stuff used in videos if there’s credit...................................sigh

Anon said: Hello, I was wondering if I could use some of your old mha art as a reference? I won’t post it anywhere, or trace your work I promise!

Sure you can!! If you don’t mean to post it you don’t even need to ask for permission! Just, you know, my stuff is full of mistakes everywhere so don’t take it too much as a good source for proper anatomy reference and stuff like that!

Anon said: a thought i've been sitting on, having not seen it, that is sending me. gojo/geto color pallet swap

You know, I did see that a while back! White-haired Geto and black-haired Gojo, it was stunning! Didn’t look much like themselves though, Gojo especially hahaha the white hair is really distinctive of him, isn’t it? With it black he kinda looks like first-year!Yuuta with sunglasses hahaha

Anon said: Hey! How you doing? So, i wanted to ask you if I could use one of your Kamijirou's fanarts in my Twitter edit, with credits of course! I hope you get mad with this shitty ask, i totally understand if you don't let me use, is your right ♡

I’d prefer it if you didn’t, sorry!!

Anon said: huhghhuhfjfjd i was scrolling thru your art and i hit a todokiribaku thing you made for a friend an d honestly that's all ive ever needed in life. your friend's taste is impeccable *sobs*

She does doesn’t she!! That’s still one golden ot3, I doubt that’s gonna change any time soon

Anon said: sfdghffgdgd gojo has the right idea. they should just make out

They should!!!!!!!!!!!!!!! I wish they had!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!

Anon said: i've been looking at your art for months and i //just// realized you've started drawing noses from different angles *facepalm*

I’m trying my best!! It’s one of the things that limited my style the most AND one of the most difficult things for me to tackle, so I’m giving it a shot but still, you know, expect them to stay inconsistent for a while haha

Anon said: so five ish years ago i followed you for haikyuu, then got into bnha through your art and now im very tempted to watch jujutsu kaisen because of you as well

ANON!!!!!! I’m so glad and happy you kept me company this long and through this many fandoms!!!! TTATT if you do try jjk I hope you’ll like it! And if you don’t and decide to leave that’s okay too, I’m just really grateful you stuck around this long already!!! ;;A;; <3<3

#fran answers #long post #have you guys listened to the new hayley williams album btw #i've been listening to it on repeat #getting my stsg feelings all over the place hahaha #sorry miss williams #break-up/i still love you though songs are a one track train for me lately #ah also #jjk spoilers #since we talk about stsg and all #:D

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reidgraygubler · 3 years

Text

a different type of high (spencer reid/reader) pt 6

Title: A Different Type of High (part six)

Request: no

Couple: spencer reid/gender-neutral!reader

Category: spicy fluff (RATED T)

Content Warning: swearing, talk about and allusions to sex, making out, mentions of dying, mentions of drug use (Dialiludid and Oxycodone), withdrawal and symptoms of withdrawal, attending narcotics anonymous, struggling with sobriety, mildly ooc spencer

Word Count: 3,637

Summary: Spencer and the team plan a dinner party to celebrate Reader’s 6-month anniversary of being clean. Reader and Spencer make a risky decision that could hurt their friendship

A/N: Oh goodness, I’m so sorry this part took so long to be posted. I’ve had half of it written for a few weeks, and then I’ve been sitting on the other half bc it originally contained smut. I sat and thought about it for a few days, and I decided at extreme last minute to edit it and make it just spicy fluff, with a rating of pg13-T for the allusions of and talks of sex. I had my best friend proofread this and made sure it was a-okay to post with those ratings! i also edited all the parts so they could be for a gender-neutral reader! so please let me know if this part (or any other part) has an issue with pronouns. Again, im so sorry it took so long for this part to be posted. anyways, thank you all for the love and support! check out my masterlist!

last part series masterlist next part

{***}{***}{***}

"Six months," I looked down at the token in hand. My eyes stayed glued to it for what seemed like an eternity, only looking away when there was a knock on the door. It wasn’t for 6 months, though, it was still my 5-month token. We’d be going to get my 6-month chip in a little bit...

"I hope you're not doing something stupid in there!" Spencer spoke on the other side of the door. I smiled before pulling the door open. He was leaning beside the door, waiting for me to leave. “I thought you’d never leave,” he looked over at me with a smile. I stepped more out of the bathroom and looked up at him.

“Nope, just going to the bathroom,” I lied, but still kept a smile on my lips. I try not to lie to Spencer, but for some reason, this one was different. If I had it my way, I would keep myself locked in the bathroom, and never having to leave again. “Do you have to go? It’s free now,” I gestured towards the door. Spencer looked down at me with a raised eyebrow. “Although, I’d give it a minute…” I looked down at the ground and shrugged.

“Are you okay?” He asked, following beside me as I walked towards his bedroom. I sat on the edge of the bed and looked up at him as he stood right in front of me. "Six months, that's quite the achievement,” he whispered as he sat beside me.

“I’m just nervous… That’s all,” I shrugged as I looked over at him, “I already want the day to be over… Is that bad to say?” I rested my head on his shoulder after I leaned on him.

“No, I don’t think so,” Spencer shook his head, “I think it’s totally valid. This is the first time that you’ve made it to such a big accomplishment… It’s exciting, it’s nerve-wracking…” he whispered.

“I think it’s more than nerve-wracking…” my voice was hardly a whisper. “We should go. The faster we go, the faster we can get this over with,” I looked up at him and shrugged.

“We should get going. It’s a very important meeting for you today. Gotta get that coin,” Spencer laughed, before standing up. I sighed deeply before standing up. I rolled my eyes. “It’ll be over faster than you think it will,” he wrapped his arm around me as he walked me outside. The weather drastically changed over the last six months, I’ve forgotten how nice Maryland can be when it’s not cold and snowy. And, as soon as we stepped outside, a warm breeze brushed across my skin and through my hair. I smiled, relaxing my shoulders slightly.

“It’s so nice out,” I looked up at Spencer and smiled. He returned the expression and looked around the street.

“Yeah, it is nice, isn’t it?” he looked back down at me with a soft smile.

“We should go to the Washington Monument! I want to see the cherry blossoms! I’m sure they’re nice and bloomed and super pretty,” I suggested, hoping he’d want to go.

“I mean, if I have time. We have cases coming in left and right,” Spencer replied, making me feel sadder. I pouted.

“Yeah, that’s right. I guess I’ll just have to go,” I looked up at him with a sly smile.

“And, you’ll have to take lots of photos for me,” he smiled at me again. I rolled my eyes before tucking myself closer into his side.

{***}{***}{***}

“I’m taking you out, come on,” Spencer grabbed my hand to pull me to my feet. I looked up at him and furrowed my eyebrows.

“What? Why?” I spoke, still staying on the couch. But, when he did finally get me on my feet, I yelped and fell into his body. Spencer wrapped his arms around my body to keep me steady. “We just got back!” I looked up as I tried to escape his grip.

“Because… You’re six months clean and that’s something worth celebrating,” he smiled as he looked down at me. “And, you deserve to be celebrated,” he whispered before poking my nose. I wrinkled my face and stuck my tongue out. “Please, for me?” he added. I dropped my shoulders. See, that’s not fair. He knows I’d do anything for him. And, if anything includes going out to celebrate something, then I guess I’ll have to do it.

“Okay, fine. You win. We can go out. But I don’t have anything nice to wear,” I spoke as I stepped away from Spencer’s embrace and towards his bedroom. I’ve basically moved into his place sometime over the last 6 months. So it could be our bedroom. But, it's an unofficial move in. I still have my shit in my shit apartment. “Granted, I don’t have much clothing here,” I looked back over at him and shrugged. It was just something to be planted in his head, maybe he’ll offer me to move in with him. Or maybe not. He’ll probably say that it isn’t very smart, me living with him.

“I guess it’s a good thing that there’s something in the bedroom for you,” Spencer smiled as he dropped his head to his shoulder. I raised an eyebrow before looking into his room. “Jennifer and Penelope helped pick it out,” his voice followed me as I entered the room.

“You didn’t have to get me this, Spencer,” I looked at him, awe in my eyes as I looked between him and the very nice clothing that was laid out on his bed. I honestly probably wouldn’t wear it out much. But if he takes me out to celebrate big milestones, then I’ll have an excuse to wear it.

“Of course I did. You should get to wear something nice on such a big night out. You get changed, I have to make a phone call real quick.” Spencer smiled at me before leaving me alone in his bedroom. I looked back down at the clothes and sighed deeply before changing out of my dingy sweater and jeans and into the dress. I looked down at my body before slowly leaving the room.

“I hate this,” I looked at Spencer, who was sitting on the couch, reading a book while he waited for me to finish getting dressed. He was quick to stand, nearly dropping his book to the ground as he looked at me. “Whaddya think?” I smiled at him before looking down at the clothes.

“You look… It looks good,” Spencer looked up at me with a smile. I looked back up at him for a brief moment, only to look away. I could feel a heat grow on my cheeks as I walked towards him. “Oh, uh… Are you ready?” He watched as I grabbed for a sweater he let me borrow.

“Only if you are, you’re the one who planned this whole thing. I was fine just staying home,” I shrugged as I followed beside him. I didn’t want to argue with him on this one, though. He wanted to do something special for me, because this was a big milestone. And, it’s the first time I’ve ever made it to 6 months. Hopefully, it’s the only time I make it this far. But, who knows, bad things happen to good people.

“I’m not going to be embarrassed, am I?” I looked up at Spencer as we walked out of his apartment. He grasped my hand as he led me out of the building.

“No, you… You shouldn’t be embarrassed,” Spencer furrowed his eyebrows and shook his head.

I don’t know why, but all I could think about was going to a restaurant on my birthday when I was younger… And, you know how the waiters and waitresses would crowd around and sing you their lame version of happy birthday, while forcing you to wear a hat that dozens of other people have worn… Their stupid birthday schtick? Remember? Ah, those were the good times, when Mom wasn’t out of her mind. But, I don’t think Spencer would force people to sing me a stupid song and wear a stupid hat for being clean of drugs for 6-months...

“I’m trusting you on this,” I smiled at him as we walked towards his car, “no one’s gonna sing like a song or anything?” I looked over at him as I slid into his car. He looked down at me with furrowed eyebrows, confusion on his face. Then it hit me that he had no idea what I was talking about.

“No…. No one’s going to sing to you,” he looked at me, his tone heavily confused.

“Nothing to worry about then,” I smiled as he pushed the door shut. I quickly buckled in and waited for Spencer to get into the driver’s side. I looked over at him with a smile as he got in. “I was just thinking… On the rare occasion when mom wasn’t awful, she’d take me out to eat, and a lot of the times it was my birthday… You remember that? And then they embarrass the fuck out of you,” I sighed as I looked at him.

“No… That never happened to me,” he glanced at me as he started his car.

“That’s a shame, we should change that,” I smiled evilly at him as he started to drive.

“I hate that you’re looking at me like that,” he looked at the road as he drove to our destination, “Do I even want to know?”

“No, but you’ll find out someday,” I smiled at him.

{***}{***}{***}

Spencer and I were very quiet as entered his apartment. I think that goes to show just how exhausted we both were. Considering he had brought me to his friend’s house, where the rest of his team was, to celebrate. It’s not that the people were exhausting, it’s just that we were out late, and I’m very emotional.

Which was the reason why I found myself crawling into bed in just a shirt and underwear. I could hear Spencer’s laughter as I got comfortable, but struggled with the blanket.

“I’m so tired,” I sighed as I pulled the blanket over my body. The bed shifted as Spencer climbed in beside me. “Like, all the tireds… Sleepy, mentally, emotionally, psychically,” I looked at him as I pressed my head into the pillow.

“Rossi does know how to have a dinner party. Six months is a pretty big thing to celebrate.” Spencer hummed as he moved closer to me. I looked up at him and smiled.

“You didn’t have to plan a party for me. I would have been okay staying here,” I whispered as I got comfortable in his form.

My back was pressed right to Spencer’s chest, just like many nights before. His arm was wrapped around my middle to hold me as close as possible to him. My legs were tangled up with his. I let out a deep breath of air before smiling to myself.

“I’m proud of you, you know that?” Spencer whispered, his nose brushing over the shell of my ear. I rolled my shoulders and hummed happily.

“Now it’s your turn,” I mumbled as I shifted slightly. I knew he was still struggling. It’s not easy… And Dilaudid seems like a kick to the ass drug. He’s trying though. He’s trying his hardest. I just wish there was a way I could help him. I knew he had been struggling more often recently. I would be too if my mentor left unexpectedly. It wasn’t fair to him, or the rest of his team. He gets to have a bit of a struggle, he shouldn’t have to though. The man who replaced Gideon though, David Rossi, is a nice guy. But I know Gideon was like his father figure to him.

Spencer let out a breath of air through his nose. His air tickling my skin and moving my hair. “I couldn’t have done it without you, ya’ know?” I mumbled, nuzzling my head into the pillow more. It was Spencer’s turn to hum. “And, I’m more than willing to be by your side,” I whispered, hoping he didn’t hear me. But, he did, because he just hugged me harder.

I know it’s only 6 months and not the rest of my life. But, without Spencer, I don’t think I could have gotten to the 6-month point. And, to be honest, I might be dead.

“That’d mean the world to me,” he whispered softly. I turned around so I was facing him. He looked down at me with a small smile. “I’m doing better, you know,” he spoke softly. I looked at him and nodded. “It’s just hard… With Gideon leaving… It just feels like everyone’s leaving,” he sniffled softly.

“I’m not leaving… And, by the looks of it all, you have an entire family that isn’t leaving you, Spencer,” I kept my eyes on him, watching as he looked down at me. He stayed quiet, mulling over the words I had just said.

In fact, that left us in a comfortable silence. My eyes stayed glued to him, whereas his were closed. I knew he wasn’t asleep though. Spencer never sleeps. I knew our day wasn’t over yet. We always talked more before either of us fell asleep.

But... something scared me. The way he held onto me. He held me like I would go missing in the morning when he did eventually wake up. His grip around my waist and torso was tight, like I was a stuffed animal and he was the owner. Part of me wondered if he feared I was a drug-induced hallucination and would vanish in thin air. I wish there was a way I could tell him, to convince him that I wouldn’t ever disappear like that.

His nose twitched as he rubbed his face into the pillow under his head. He slowly opened his eyes and looked back at me, the exhaustion of the day sitting in his eyes and expression. I understood that feeling. But, if he was anything like me, and he is a lot like me, I knew that even though he was exhausted, sleep wouldn’t find us in a while.

“Go to sleep,” he whispered, closing his eyes as he pretended to sleep. I laughed lightly, causing him to glare at me.

“I’m not tired, and I know you’re not either. You’re faking it,” I muttered as I shifted even closer to him. I still kept my head tilted up so I could look at him. “You know I’m right,” I whispered, a smile suddenly appearing on my lips.

“I’m not arguing your statement, am I?” Spencer replied, a smile growing on his lips. I almost kissed him. At that moment, it felt right. Our sudden sarcastic banter just made me want to kiss him.

“No, no you’re not,” I laughed lightly as I looked at him. Spencer kept his eyes on me, hugging me harder as he tried to bring me closer to him. But at this point if I was any closer to him, I’d probably be in him. “Can I ask you a question,” I whispered so softly. If it was daylight or any other time of day, with any sound, I wouldn’t be heard. Spencer laughed before reopening his eyes.

“You just did,” he retorted as he looked at me. I rolled my eyes as I readjusted, moving so I was more face to face with him instead of face to chest.

“I meant a real question, Agent Reid,” I stuck my tongue out at him. The smile that grew on his lips made me feel warm, and I couldn’t help but laugh.

“You can always ask me a question, and you don’t even have to ask,” Spencer replied, his smile becoming more genuine than before. I could feel my heart beating as I looked at him. My body felt like it was flooding with a feeling that I’ve never felt towards another person… I just couldn’t put a name to it yet.

“Can I kiss you,” I whispered. It just happened. The words fell from my mouth, like I had no control over my mouth and the words I was saying. And now that the words hung in the air, I was left just staring at Spencer, and my heart in my throat.

The expression on his face told me he was thinking about it. But the long silence was beginning to make me feel nervous. What if I ruined it all? What if I just ruined my friendship with Spencer all because I wanted to kiss him? It’s just my luck though, I get something so beautiful and so precious, I ruin it, or it gets ruined. But in this case… It was my own fault and doing.

The next thing I knew, Spencer’s hands were cupping my cheeks, and his lips were against mine. It felt like the wind was knocked out of me with the sudden action. I was a little caught off guard. I guess his prolonged silence just convinced me nothing was going to happen. But I was definitely happy that it did, indeed, happen. And, I definitely enjoyed it.

His lips were soft, yet somehow slightly chapped. I could feel the moisture on his lips from when he licked them moments ago, and I could taste the tiny bit of wine he had just an hour ago. The warmth of his body made me feel safe as I gravitated closer into his body. My heart pounded in my chest, and I wondered if he could feel it against his. My hands gravitated towards his head, my fingers getting tangled in his hair.

Spencer hummed as I gently tugged on the hair on the back of his neck. The breath from his nose tickled around my lips and nose. Every movement he made, my body was quick to follow. I just couldn’t get enough of him, and he knew that.

He was gentle as he moved so he was over me. His arms were wrapped around my torso, holding me close to his body. I knew I wanted to further what was happening, and part of me could sense Spencer did too. I pulled my head away, pressing it into the pillow a little bit so I could look up at him. He returned the look, but a certain fire was in his eyes.

“Can we,” I stopped myself from talking, worried that I was even more out of line for asking if we could have sex. At least I’m asking. “We don-” I continued, but failed when Spencer pressed his lips to mine.

“Yeah… Yeah we can,” he muttered before going to take off his shirt.

{***}{***}{***}

It was honestly better than any type of high I’ve had before. Definitely better than marijuana, or oxycodone, or Dilaudid. I wonder if Spencer thought the same about that. This was probably safer too. You can’t overdose on sex, can you? Damn, I guess if that’s how I go… That’s how I go.

“Hey,” Spencer looked down at me with a small smile. I swallowed roughly before returning the smile to him. He brushed my hair away from my face before holding both my cheeks in his hands.

“Hey,” I returned the smile with a small giggle. Spencer laughed before kissing me again. It was tender and passionate with this kiss, and I wanted to melt into him. His hands were still on my cheeks, holding my face.

“Are you okay? I didn’t hurt you or anything? Did I?” He asked, his tone heavily laced with worry. He moved his nose so it brushed against mine, smushing it to my face. I laughed and shook my head.

“No, no, Spencer. You didn’t hurt me,” I laughed as I pressed my hands to his chest. “I don’t think you could hurt me… No matter what you do,” I quietly whispered. Spencer looked down at me and smiled.

“I promise I won’t ever hurt you,” he returned in a whisper, "and I won't ever leave you."

“In all seriousness, though, I didn’t know I had a sex drive like that…” I laughed, watching as Spencer sat up and away from me. “I mean, after all the oxy I’ve taken…” I shrugged, sitting up and wrapping a blanket around my body. Spencer looked over at me with a raised eyebrow as he stood up.

“Considering it’s been six months, you don’t have it in your system anymore,” he looked at me for a moment before grabbing his boxers and an undershirt. “I’m getting you water, do you want anything else?” He walked around the bed and came to stand beside me. I looked up at him and pushed out my lips, silently asking for a kiss. Spencer smiled before pecking my lips quickly.

“I’m okay with water,” I watched as he walked away. He nodded before leaving me alone in his room (Again, I would go as far as to say our room. But I don’t exactly live with him… full time).

When I finished cleaning myself up in his bathroom, I grabbed one of his shirts and a pair of boxers, and I sat on the center of the bed, waiting for him to return.

I realized something while I was waiting for him to come back to bed. And it’s something I don’t think I could ever tell him. Because, if I tell him this, I’d probably lose him. I don’t think I could handle losing Spencer.

I loved him. I loved Spencer Reid and that was probably going to be the thing that killed me.

a different type of high taglist: @shameleswhorehourstm , @itsametaphorbriansblog , @bxtchboy69 , @sammypotato67 , @seninjakitey , @thatsonezesty13 , @thebluetint , @honestlystop , @herecomesthewriterwitch , @mediocrity-atitsfinest , @honeyboysteezy , @aluna190

tags that didn’t work: @exilereid , @mediocrehamiltrash

(if you want to be a part of the a different type of high tag list, please reply or send me a message!)

#shadow writes stuff #masterlist #matthew gray gubler #spencer reid #criminal minds #mgg #spencer reid fanfiction #spencer reid imagine #spencer reid x reader #doctor spencer reid #doctor spencer reid imagine #doctor spencer reid fanfiction #doctor spencer reid fan fiction #spencer reid fluff #spencer reid x you #doctor spencer reid x reader #spencer reid angst #a different type of high

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purpletaecup · 4 years

Photo

6 ☾ these echoes of laughter fade into a distant memory

note: fully written chapter again this time, with social media half chapters coming later this week! this chapter is mainly Yoongi and we see a little bit of his side and how he felt in the past and how he feels in the present. not edited, wanted to post this before the concert so we can all cry together!

rlly important note: i suggest you guys listen to nineteen by hayley williams because i basically base this whole story off that song (and some chinese webnovels i read lmfao). It’s one of my favorite songs ever and it hurts a whole lot. I wish i could experience how I felt when I listened to it for the first time again. As always, feel free to vent/rant and tell me your theories about how the story is going to go! let’s cry together :’)

final note: IM SORRYYY FOR THISSSS don’t hate me pleaseee

word count: 2,523

That night, Yoongi slept in your hospital room. The emotional weight of everything that had happened had kept him nailed to the chair beside your bed. The smell of the air after the rain permeated into the room and reminded him of the day that his lawyer delivered the divorce papers to you, who was alone at home and probably waiting for him. Looking back at it, maybe it was an impulse decision that he made due to the frustration and exhaustion that your marriage caused him. He grew weary and waking up in the morning felt like a chore. You were distant, he was distant and both of you were living lives going in different directions. But you loved each other, and for a while, he thought that could be enough. Evidently, it wasn’t. He doesn’t regret the divorce because in the end, he thought he was doing what was best for the both of you. He knew how tired you were and how you felt being around the people in his life. He felt the same way with the people in yours. Everything about your lives clashed and he thought that divorce was the best solution for both of you to become happy again. He wasn’t getting any younger, but you were still very young and you could still find someone who could love and cherish you better than he could.

He didn’t regret it.

He didn’t.

Or at least that’s what he keeps telling himself. He didn’t regret it. He couldn’t regret it. But remembering how you looked when he came home that night breaks his heart to pieces. Your pale and shivering figure crying by the front door and the way your trembling hands shook him off when he tried to help you up. It was a sight that would remain ingrained in his mind and his heart forever. When you two finally made it inside your house to sit on the couch, he fully expected you to shout and scream and throw a tantrum about the divorce papers. He did not expect the quiet sobs that wracked your figure, or the broken “why are you doing this?” and finally the resignation in your voice when you told him you’d sign it. He remembered, at that moment, that he began crying too. He walked over and sat next to you and took you in his arms like you were his whole world even though he knew he had just ruined yours. With his head buried in your damp hair and neck, he whispered a million apologies. Sorry for breaking your heart. Sorry for wasting your time. Sorry for not knowing how to love you properly. Sorry for not trying.

These apologies meant nothing to you. They were nothing compared to the pain you had endured to be with him, to love him. He didn’t know that. For the last months of your relationship, he didn’t know who you were and that’s what pushed him to get the divorce. You were a shell of the woman you were when you two first met. Your smile didn’t make butterflies appear in his stomach anymore and your laugh didn’t make his heart flutter like it used to. It wasn’t the same anymore. You were both different people, changed people.

In the midst of this change, he was introduced to Yura by Jungkook. A model he worked with a couple times and a really nice woman. Beautiful, even. Almost as beautiful as you, he had thought when he first met her. Jungkook pushed and pushed for him to hang out with them and the rest of the guys and the more he saw Yura, the more he talked to her, the more he began to like her. She reminded him of you when he first met you.

You were 19 and he was 23 and you were modeling at the same set he was supposed to shoot at an hour later. He came early to help the staff prepare for his music video shoot and hopefully talk to the director but he had ended up watching your shoot for most of the time until it was his turn for the set. The people around you liked to say that Yoongi fell in love with you at first sight. He often refuted that it wasn’t at first sight because he wasn’t the type of person to fall in love because of how someone looks. In private, he told you that he fell in love with you at first smile, first laugh. The sight of you laughing genuinely in the middle of hydrangeas and baby’s-breath enchanted him so much that he remained rooted to the floor for the remainder of your shoot.

The laughs and the smiles were Yoongi’s favorite. You were the most beautiful person he’d ever met. You are still the most beautiful he’d ever met, but perhaps it was the exhaustion of life that wore the both of you down. What had started as a beautiful, youthful romance filled with picnics in meadows had ended with divorce papers on a rainy day in September.

These are the thoughts that followed Yoongi to sleep that night.

☾

[nov. 10, 2020]

The same thoughts haunted him day in and day out ever since he left that next morning at the insistence of Jungkook and Taehyung. He spent 4 days on his own, working and living his life but only on the surface. Conservations with people, including his friends, remained minimal. He couldn’t stop thinking about your broken and bruised body laying in the hospital bed, and he was anxious for the news of you waking up but none had come. He received no calls from the hospital since he left, and Taehyung said that visiting was meaningless unless the doctor told him new information.

Yura told him, verbatim, “I understand that you’re worried about her safety, but the doctors said she would be fine. She’s your ex-wife, I get it, but she’s not your responsibility anymore.”

In a way, she was right. But he couldn’t help but feel sick at the thought of leaving you all alone there. He knew it was hard for Jin to come out because he was incredibly busy with work, and when he wasn’t traveling for his job, he lived too far from both of you to ever accompany you in the way that you needed. In addition to that, he had no idea what happened to you and your mom. The last he heard, which was when you were still married, you were on speaking terms with her and there wasn’t a problem between the two of you. At least not that he knew of. Namjoon was on a book tour and Jimin was constantly booked due to his dance career. In any case, you had no one here. Yoongi was all you had and that was evident in your unchanged emergency contact list.

After Yura had said that, he felt uneasy being around her so he told her that he truthfully couldn’t stand to just move on with his life while you were practically lifeless in the hospital, and if that was a problem with her then maybe they should just take a break from each other. He kept telling himself that he really liked Yura and he wanted what she could give him, but he couldn’t ignore the four years that you two spent building a life together. Especially not now that you were pregnant, a fact that he had kept hidden from Yura.

When he thought about the pregnancy, everything else seemed to melt away. Despite the circumstances, the news of your pregnancy made him happy. Extremely so, albeit a little scared as well. He wondered how long you had known, and if you were happy or scared.Or what if you didn’t know at all? As far as he could tell, you weren’t showing. There was no sign of a bump on your little belly, but the doctor’s words were irrefutable. There was a baby growing in there. A baby that was half you and half him and that thought of that made him smile like he hadn’t in a long, long time.

That night, he dreamt about a little girl with your eyes and your smile and a nose that resembled his. A laughter that reminded him of yours echoed in those dreams.

☾

[nov. 11, 2020]

Pleasant dreams faded into a pleasant morning as Yoongi woke up much earlier than he was used to and felt better than he had in ages. He spent some time by himself before his phone was bombarded by phone calls and text messages from the group chat with the boys asking him when he was coming for work.

As he saw the sun take its place in the blue skies and white clouds, he decided that the day was too beautiful to waste on a day in the company. 5 days passed since your accident and he thought it was time to go back to the hospital and see how you were doing. Of course he wasn’t expecting any changes to your condition considering he hasn’t gotten any phone calls from the hospital yet, but he thought it might make him feel more at ease to sit next to you.

On his way to the hospital, he stopped by the flower shop you often went to, the one next to the park with the yellow flowers that you liked so much. The woman at the front, whose name was Yerin by the looks of her nametag, recognizes you immediately.

“Mr. Min Yoongi? How can we help you today?” She asks, immediately standing up straight at your intimidating presence.

“Just here to get some flowers.” He replies nonchalantly.

Yerin runs around the counter to stand in front of him.

“Is there anything specific you’re looking for?”

“No, not really—wait a second, that flower right there. Give me a bouquet of those.” He says, pointing to the bunches of purple flowers hiding behind Yerin.

She turns to see what he was pointing to. “Ah, purple lilacs. Okay, I’ll put it together for you really quick!”

He saw her go around the many shelves of flowers to what he assumed was the back inventory of the shop and didn’t see her come out until a couple of minutes later. In her hands was a beautiful bouquet of the purple lilacs with white baby's-breath. His eyes softened at the sight of the white flowers. The sight was familiar to him.

“That would be 25,830 won.” Yerin handed the bouquet to him and smiled.

He handed her 35,000 won, murmured his thanks and left. Once out of the shop, he was hit by the bright sunlight and couldn’t help looking over to the park. Kids were running around while their parents watched them on picnic blankets.

Warm and sunny days like this reminded him of you. Spending your days in the sun, laying on a picnic blanket and eating fruits, was your very existence.

He spends only a few moments admiring the scenery of people enjoying the weather before he makes his way back to his car and to the hospital. When he arrives at your room, nothing has changed except for the fact that your skin has regained a bit of its color and the bruises began the healing process.

Yoongi sets the flowers down on the table beside your bed. He moves the chair from the wall to the side of the bed so he could sit right next to you. His heart almost stops when he sees your face. It seems like the nurses changed the bandage on your head as the bandaging was noticeably lighter, but he could still see a bit of blood seeping through. The bruises on your arms and everywhere alarm him but he knows that you’re okay and you’re healing and that’s enough for him. It’s enough to know that you were alive and going to be fine.

His eyes trail down to your stomach and he lets it linger on them for a long time because he takes your hand in his and takes a deep breath. Two months ago he could have never imagined that this is where he would be right now. Two months ago, both of you had walked away from your marriage and Yoongi honestly thought that you two may never have crossed paths again despite his thoughts going to you more often than it should be. Now, two months later, you were divorced and pregnant with his child. His eyes continue to stare at your stomach, still flat and showing no signs of carrying a second life, and he resists the urge to caress it. You weren’t conscious and even if you were, would you allow your ex-husband to feel your stomach like that? No, probably not.

And that’s when he felt a twitch in his hand, not coming from his own. He looks down to see your fingers moving just barely. His first reaction was shock, then anxiety. He didn’t know what to do and the shock of your movement paralyzed him. It was only when he felt another movement, stronger this time, that he felt the need to press the call button to alarm the doctors and nurses. You were moving, which meant that you might be waking up.

The moments pass quickly and slowly at the same time. The doctors barely made it in time to see you flutter your eyes open and groan with a broken voice. Yoongi looked down at you, still holding your hand. You blinked your eyes multiple times. The light was too bright to take in all at once. He squeezed your hand at the relief he felt in seeing you wake up.

“Yn, how are you feeling baby?” He couldn’t help the pet name that came out of his mouth. You looked so vulnerable and fragile that it came out on instinct.

Yoongi waited for a reply for a little bit but heard none. The doctor came around to stand next to you.

“Miss Yn? Can you see us? Hear us?” he asked.

You nodded slowly, wincing at the pain in and on your head.

“Where m’I?” You attempt to speak out, but it comes out broken and croaky.

Yoongi is glad to hear your voice, to hear you talk for the first time in so long.

“You’re in the hospital right now, you were in a car accident but you’re okay now baby. How are you feeling?” He couldn’t help but ask.

You craned your head towards him, blinking furiously with your eyebrows furrowed. Confusion marred your features. Yoongi was scared that you finally realized he was here, with you, and would kick him out at any chance. He was scared that you were going to kick him out of you life before he could ever see the baby that you had made together, but this fear of his could have never prepared him for the next words to come out of your mouth.

“Who are you?”

☾

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alreadyblondenow · 4 years

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Changes

Johnny x reader // SMUT, angst, fluff, virgin!reader Summary: Every single part of you changed when you met Johnny. He’s a sweet responsible man who takes care of you even though he’s completely aware that you can take care of yourself. Even so, you let him because he gives you warmth that you can’t give yourself. Word count: 3k Warnings: Virginity loss, swearing, explicit mature themes, virginity kink?, corruption Note: If some words were misplaced, I apologise in advance. Half assed proofread hehe I’ll edit tomorrow im so sleepy. If you read already, Im sending you love. And thanks for putting up with shit hihi

You remember being a good daughter during high school. How you manage to have a high GPA just so you could make your parents proud and go to a nice college.

And when you got in to your dream college, you remember doing everything right during your those four years. Studied harder than ever and almost broke your back from staying up in front of your computer to finish your thesis. It was always about doing the right thing, staying on track, keeping out from trouble, always so sure what to do next after accomplishing the another. Until you met Johnny. It was the first time you felt so dumb and stupidly in love.

“Baby its not even in yet” you were sure that Johnny’s cock was inside already because the stretch hurts. It hurts so bad you can’t breath properly. “It fucking hurts.”

Johnny let out a giggle, kissing your breast while being half inside you, “Baby it supposed to hurt you’re a virgin” he’s clearly enjoying teasing you underneath him and savouring the tightness of your pussy for the first time. “My virgin” kissing you a little too sweet and soft even though he’s cock is making your eyes teary. He pushes in again slowly with your consent and fucks you slow, then fast when he sees you relaxing already.

“Johnny wait - it really fucking hurts baby” you pant asking for more time. “Okay okay, Im going slow again, sorry. I thought-“ and he fucks you slowly again, kissing your neck and collarbones.

When the pain was gone, Johnny feels good inside you. You let a string of curses, kissing and bitting him almost covering his face with spit. With a steady and deep pace you were slowly getting why people love having sex. “Still hurting?” Johnny already knew the answer but he wanted to hear it from you. “Not anymore? Hmm. My virgin girlfriend?” you hum at the pet name he calls you. What a weird thing to call you, you thought. But you love it.

Drowned by lust and pleasure, you didn’t notice Johnny was picking up his pace. He’s to experienced for a virgin like you. The both of you can only groan and moan from the feeling you give each other. Exchanging kisses and bites to show affection and appreciation.

“Ugh you’re almost there now aren’t you?” Johnny asked in between fucking you faster than before but not enough to wreck you. “Feels good now yeah?” he grabs you legs and puts it closer to your chest for a new angle.

“Baby - You fuck good” you gulp, trying to help yourself speak while he fucks you with the new angle. “Is this what I’m missing for months now?” and theres Johnny’s smirk again

“Im afraid so baby, Im afraid so”

You whine when he slowed down his pace. “Do you mind if I play a bit?” you didn’t gave him an answer but Johnny proceeds anyway. He knew you’re at the edge already and being the experienced one between the two of you, he wants to have fun and make the best out of this moment. Unexpectedly you earned long and hard stripes of lick on your cunt that made you closed your eyes shut and yell at him.

Johnny is so amused seeing you so fucked up for the first time. Without a warning he pushes inside you again and fucks you with the same pace as earlier. He noticed your eyebrows furrow and your lips parted letting out sounds so sweet for him.

“I think I found you sweet spot baby” you couldn’t agree more.

“Am I fucking you good huh? Am I fucking you right?” only gasps and moans comes out from your mouth.

“You have to show me baby. You have to cum” but that’s the problem, you knew you have this weird feeling in your abdomen that you somehow can’t let go off. Finally having the strength to talk back, latching on his arms and moving you head from side to side, “I’m trying to let go baby - fuck give me time” but being the dominant that he says he is, Johnny is losing patience and you don’t know what to do. “Aren’t I fucking you good? Why aren’t you cuming yet huh?”

And just as you though the knotting in your abdomen couldn’t get worse, it did. But this time you knew what you want. “Fuck baby! More” to your surprise, he didn’t fucked you faster but he fucked you harder instead. You didn’t know it will give you the same satisfaction that you were craving for just seconds ago before he delivered hard thrusts. He felt your pussy clench and that’s enough for Johnny to make the both of you cum together.

“There you go. You like it rough huh okay I’ll do better next round” Thrust. Thrust. Thrust. You can feel his hips slapping on your skin and you finally felt that sweet release that he was asking for. You cum before him and he chased his orgasm by fucking you faster, he didn’t know that made you overstimulated. “You’re okay, sshh. You’re okay.”

He removes the condom and helped you come down your high. Massaging everything he can as a form of apology, “sorry for being rough” he kisses your shoulders and you encircled your arms around him.

“I got a boyfriend that can fuck that good?” forcing a smile trying to fight the exhaustion. Johnny blushed by your sudden compliment making his eyes small. When you pull him for a hug, his body is warm and sweaty but he surprisingly still smells good. That day you asked Johnny to keep on fucking you until you learn how to be confident on having sex with him. For you, Johnny was the prefect person to help you say goodbye to your innocence.

Every single part of you changed when you met Johnny. He’s a sweet responsible man who takes care of you even though he’s completely aware that you can take care of yourself. Even so, you let him because he gives you warmth that you can’t give yourself.

He completely changed your uptight personality and introduced you to thrills and excitement. You never felt so alive after giving up that perfect image of you that you try to maintain.

He made you crave for pleasure and lust that he’s willing to give as long as you let him love you unconditionally and you give the same in return. Of course you love Johnny. He taught you that love shouldn’t always be perfect and that it could be a lot more complicated sometimes. Which is true. You always thought love should be perfect and it’s always about marriage and having kids. And you want none of that. For the first time in your life you don’t want to follow the life your parents want you to have.

Johnny is balls deep in your pussy, panties to the side and fucking you good on the dinner table. The man couldn’t get his hands off of your perfect figure. The room is full of moans and the sound of the table rocking back and forth from Johnny’s thrusts.

“What if we get married?” Johnny blurted out.

That doesn’t sound right. “Ah!” still catching your breath gasping and wanting more but what you heard made your head dizzy. “Johnny, I need you to get off”

“What- why? What did I do?” you got down from the table grabbing your satin shorts on the floor, wearing it again. You see Johnny putting his cock back in his boxer briefs and putting his pants on. “Is it because of what I just said? Im sorry I didn’t mean to. Lets just forget about it okay?”

“The fact that you already considered it Johnny... you will continuously think about it then someday you’re going to ask me again and again” you crossed your arms and sat across the table.

“What?” he scoffed. “Didn’t you think that someday we will get married? Didn’t that crossed your mind! Isn’t that the goal? Isn’t that our goal!”

“Don’t shout. And no. Thats the last thing that I want. And see, thats what Ive been saying. Once you thought about the M word, you will never stop thinking about it ever again” there was a few minutes of silence, you knew you’re gonna tear up the moment you talk again. But he has to hear your part, he has the right to know what you want.

“Getting... “ your voice already cracked. “Having kids, settling down all of it. You don’t know how those things work Johnny, they’re suffocating. The weight of the responsibilities is unbearable”

“So you’re saying a life with me is something bad that will change your life completely” he wanted you to look at him but you can’t, “So what? Were just gonna fuck like teenagers until were 40? You sound like you’re going to leave me one day.”

“I don’t know. Its just… its not me Johnny”

“Or maybe you just don’t love me enough y/n” he pushed his hair back leaning on the table and staring you down with cold eyes, “clearly were not on the same page anymore.”

“Thats not true”

He doesn’t say a word. He gets his jacket and kissed you on your cheeks. You can’t watch him leave because it will hurt you so much. But when you heard your door close gently, suddenly you felt so weak and cold.

The next day you asked him to go grab breakfast with you before you two go to work. Not knowing how to fix this, you still tried to reach up to him. Maybe you just got lucky that he didn’t want to pry on what happened yesterday and everything seemed fine during breakfast. From there on Johnny stopped talking about what he wants to happen in the future. Not bringing up the M word again, he’s not asking you random baby names anymore, no more IKEA window shopping for your future shared apartment. And quite frankly you miss it. Without Johnny being hopeful like that, your relationship seems dull.

You try to bring the old him back by asking him to go IKEA shopping with you. He agreed but he was quiet the whole time. He just talks whenever you asked him something.

You caught him looking at this couple who was checking furnitures together, his eyes full of envy and you can see right through him.

When you got home, you placed the bags on top of the table and went straight to the bathroom to cry. Constantly blaming yourself for not wanting the same thing as Johnny wants and for ruining the relationship you have. You grabbed a towel from the basket and you bit it to filter your screams. If you thought he didn’t hear any of your sobs and screams, you’re wrong. He’s waiting for you on the other side of the door crying his eyes out too.

Knowing that he’s outside waiting for you, you tried forming your words and forcing yourself to speak. “B-baby, I just cant provide the things you want in life anymore. You’re hurt, Im hurt. And we cant fix it because we don’t want the same things anymore. I can’t force myself to marry you and have kids when I don’t want to. And You don’t have to stop wanting and dreaming to have a family just because I don’t want to. Johnny, I think this is where it ends” You told him he could leave you and there will be no hard feelings. The breakup was somehow peaceful, no screaming and yelling like what you thought it would be. Maybe you just love each other that much but it’s still not enough.

After breaking up with Johnny, you went back home and help your sister plan her wedding. Although the two of you has very different views when it comes to marriage, you loved seeing your sister happy and excited to be married. During the wedding your sister shared the news that she’s already seven weeks pregnant and you couldn’t be more happier and the day became even more eventful because of the little angel. That day, you saw your sister’s husband tear up while she was walking down the aisle. That day, you heard your sister’s husband shout “I’m going to be a father!” You can’t help but think about how happy Johnny must be if he become someone’s husband and how happy he could be when he finally become a father.

After months and months of waiting, you finally met the little angel. An angel that changed your life. You don’t know what happened to you but meeting the little angel changed your perception in life. Yours sister’s baby was a miracle to many people, you included. Seeing how happy your sister and her husband with the baby made you realise that bringing life into this world can give you genuine happiness. You loved your niece unconditionally, showered him with every love you could possibly give and turns out you’re good with kids.

Another wedding is bound to happen, a little rushed and unplanned but you do know the couple loved each other. You knew you could possibly ran into Johnny during the wedding and you did. He looked fine as always, almost made every bridesmaid craving for him.

“All right! calling all the single ladies, it’s time for bride to throw her bouquet”

You were sure you’re sitting far from the bride not bothering to even get up and participate. You were also sure that you will never going to catch it even if you made an effort. But somehow you wanted it to come to you, near enough and catch it with both arms for Johnny. And it did. It landed on your lap. You scoffed looking at the beautiful flowers, smelling it to make it less awkward.

When the party started, everyone was almost drunk enough to care whose wedding it is. Laughter and giggles everywhere. You were alone, enjoying a whole bottle of champagne all by yourself.

“Mind if you tell who’s the lucky guy?” not turning your head back to look, that voice is familiar enough for you to know who it is.

“So happy to see you here Johnny” instead of giving him a hug you gave him a toast. Looking at each other’s fingers. Johnny checks your finger for any sign of an engagement ring and you checking his fingers for a wedding ring.

None. You answered his question to make the situation less awkward, “Just got lucky” you let out a small giggle. “The bride pretty much threw it far. And it just so happens that I’m sitting far enough for it to land on my lap” you both laughed, happy that you’re able to see each other again. Happy to have the chance to see each other’s eyes again without tears in it.

“How about you? Who’s the lucky girl?” Johnny laughs and downed the remaining alcohol from his glass.

“Still you”

You didn’t expect him to be straightforward but you’re happy about it. That night Johnny brought you to his new apartment and you had sex on his couch, on his bedroom floor and on his bed. The next morning you were welcomed back to Johnny’s life again with all smiles, kisses and a lot of orgasms he almost ran out of condoms.

For the past couple of months you and Johnny were busy catching up with all the years you spent apart and slowly building a more established relationship. Your life couldn’t be more happier.

“Baby Im home. And Im tired” you heard him drop his keys at the table near the door, of course he made his way to the kitchen first. Feeling his arms encircled around your waist, “I’m almost done with making dinner” you gave him a kiss and he made his way to the living room. Then you heard him shout, you slowly put down the hot pot and hurried yourself to Johnny.

“Oh my gosh! Who are you?” Johnny is pointing at your sister’s baby crawling around in the living room, playing with his toys.

“Gosh you scared me. T-thats my sister’s baby. I need to babysit tonight hope you don’t mind”

“Oh! I don’t mind… Come here you little ball of sunshine, lets play” and Johnny came crawling around the living room trying to catch the energetic baby. You giggle at the sight of Johnny crawling around. He’s so tall and big.

“Johnny, I thought you’re tired…”

“Nope. Not anymore”

When you’re both in bed with the baby in between the two of you, Johnny cant stop looking after the kid, humming lullabies and patting his small legs making him sleep deeper.

“Johnny a lot of things changed when we were apart. I started to love kids and actually looking forward on having one someday” you looked at him, “or some…” you whispered carefully not to wake the sleeping angel. He chuckled lightly, pushing his hair back “I know” he whispered back. He pats his side of the bed, gesturing you to lay beside him. He puts a pillow next to the sleeping kid so he can still roll around the bed safely.

Johnny pulled you close to him, hovering his leg on yours. He feels warm as always. “For how long?” you asked out of curiosity. “since we got back together. You constantly talk about having our own house someday whenever we watch lifestyle network. And, you constantly ask me to fuck you raw” You were both trying not to laugh so hard cover each others mouths. Before you two close your eyes, Johnny told you he liked the idea of the two of you whispering “Whispering is good. Can’t wait to have more whispering moments with you.”

The next day your sister came in really early, Johnny was still sleeping. You told her how he took care of the baby and that he was the one who babysit the whole night playing and taking care of him. “tell Johnny I said thank you. And please, make your own baby” you can’t believe your sister just told you to have your own baby already. “Okay okay. Get out already before you wake him up. I love you, drive safe”

When you came back to the bed with Johnny, he kissed you good morning completely aware that the baby is already with your sister. “I’m gonna miss the little guy” eyes still closed he’s still whispering so you played along. “Well, we can always make our own little guy” and that woke Johnny up hovering you and showering you with wet kisses. He’s so heavy but you’d rather let him crush you than being away from him again.

“Just so you know I want three kids. Two boys one girl” he says with a big smile while drawing circles around your tummy. “You do realise thats three different educations…” he chuckled and showered your exposed tummy with kisses making you tickle and whine.

“I know, thats why were gonna save like crazy before having them” he finally kissed you on the lips.

“I like that plan Johnny Seo you sound even more sexier. Lets be sure everything is fine and settled when they enter this world”

“And completely change our lives” he can’t stop rubbing your tummy, “I love how we’re compromising now. I never want to yell at you ever again. Not now, not ever. Definitely not in front our children”

You catch his hand and interlock your fingers with his, “I never want that to happen too baby” Johnny came closer to you, kissing you deeply. “Baby why are we whispering?”

you feel his hands creep inside your shorts, teasing your clothed clit and you let out a soft moan, biting his lips. “I don’t know... practicing to be quiet maybe?” He chuckles in between kisses.

“You going to marry me now?”

“Yes Johnny, I will”

................................................. Masterlist

#nct-writers #neowritingsnet #cznnet #nct smut #nct johnny #johhny seo #nct fluff #nct angst #nctfic #nct scenarios #smut fic #smut #johnny seo smut #nct #kpop fic #nct imagines

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energyanon · 3 years

Text

Henry Reading Part II

As always, I wrote this in real time, and edited punctuation after. I’ve italicised all of the “placements” names so hopefully it makes more sense for you guys to know what placement i’m talking about. Also keep in mind everytime i move to a next placement its because the energy has said all it needs to with the last person. And also note everytime that anything in the field moves, I have to check in with everything else cause movement means change in the dynamic, and so it’s always good to check in to see what the placements think about that. Guys... it’s a long one but... Im cautiously hopeful at the moment omg.

Placing HC, body, image/status and fans.

HC, body and I/S are standing beside each other in a line. Body was close to HC, then I/S wanted to be on top of him, for energetic reasons I put image next to him instead, wedged between him and body.

Immediately HC just wanted to sit down and relax but felt claustrophobic with everything so close to him. A little anxious, very hot, and off kilter. He wanted to move away from the other two, so I moved him. He’s now in the furthest part of the field, but he is SMOKING hot like I’m BOILING.

Image/status also is feeling a bit off kilter, it keeps swaying one way to the next but heavily leaning towards Body now. Like as if it’s entire gravity is based off of “body”s orbit.

When Image/Status looks at Henry it doesn’t even seem to recognise him. Kind of like a “what are you doing here” and it’s heavily leaning towards body, it has no regard for HC as a human whatsoever.

Body is also a little off kilter but feels like it can’t move or feel anything, and it’s only swaying to each side slightly. There’s a lot of pressure in the throat/lungs. But otherwise body is numb. It doesn’t feel like a living organism it feels like a statue.

Body will not look anywhere besides in front of it and down.

You know what it feels like, it feels like Body is standing in those lines in the military where a captain is walking down and assessing every person there and you have to stand still and silent and wait for this person to assess you and then leave. It’s a very obedient feeling like “I have to stay here and do what I’m told”

It doesn’t feel like it has any freedom whatsoever.

So I’m gonna add Body IMAGE, instead of just Body and see how they interact.

Oh I just remembered I have placed fans but literally none of them are paying any attention to it. So we move on.

Body image is directly in front of Henry. If it could be apart of him it would, but it’s standing in front of him, noses touching.

It feels like a mother (yikes)

It’s telling him he’s not good enough

Hands on hips, it’s very stern.

100% a mother energy. Not a MOTHERLY energy it feels like a stocky woman shorter, has authority over him and he respects it.

I know that sounds like DG, but this is just the “energy” I’m feeling so it could be actual mother or another woman in his life that has this kind of energy. It could also be that females are a heavy influence on his life.

Body Image is Disappointed “you can do better”. it’s looking him straight in the eyes. It’s not happy with him at all, it doesn’t seem to have any compassion for him, it almost feels disgusted, like it shouldn’t have to be wasting it’s time but it is. It also feels like a bit of a bully like if he wants to move it moves with him going “where are you going huh. You stay right here you can’t walk away from me”

Henry

Surprisingly, he isn’t crippled by body image being there it’s more like it’s a nuisance.

Body Image to him feels very military once again, “this is my superior, I have to listen I have to do what it wants, but I’m tired of listening to it. But I’m just gonna stand here and shut up and be as invisible as possible until it does.” Feels very “sir yes sir” to him.

He feels very stuck here but he WANTS to move (that’s great news) he just feels like he can’t while body image is in the way and he’s not gonna try until it’s gone.

When he looks at BODY he’s looking at it forlorn. Like he wants to be United with body, but body is listening to whatever it’s being commanded by and so is he, so neither of them can move.

I got him to look at fans cause I wasn’t feeling anything for them. When he looks at fans he gets instant anxiety but also doesn’t believe he has the time to deal with that right now and he just wants to look over at Body. Anxiety leaves as soon as he stops looking at fans.

There’s a sadness when he looks at Body, almost like he misses a lover. He wants it back. He wants to hug it and tell it that it’s ok, he wants to comfort it. He feels like Body is in a worse place than he is. He thinks Body is struggling. When he looks at status/image he actually has 0 concern he’s just worried about Body.

I moved to fans. Fans feels nothing for the field. Makes sense cause it seems like no one is paying attention to it. I’m taking that to mean that fans doesn’t need to be here. It’s not the issue being dealt with. I’m taking fans out.

Taking note that HC doesn’t seem as unbelievably depressed as he was in the last one but we also have a different set up. But still interesting.

Body:

Body still an absolute statue will not look anywhere but ahead

Status/Image The only movement status wants is to be CLOSER to Body so that they are almost one. I’ve got status/image behind Body, but hugging it from behind. Not in a loving way but it feels connected it feels like that’s where it’s meant to be

Body:

Body immediately feels hot with S/I there behind it. It’s falling back a little but eyes still ahead. Still a statue. Feels… almost comfort with S/I there but it’s not comfort it’s like.. it feels… more stable.. like body doesn’t WANT it there but it’s not going to move and if S/I moved it would almost feel like a loss. It wouldn’t know what to do with itself.

Henry

Now that S/I has moved behind body and is hugging it, HC is panicked, still not moving, still blocked by body image but he’s looking at S/I now, S/I has his full attention.

His first thought was “no please don’t move there” and now he’s just staring at S/I knowing he can do nothing

Ok INTERESTING. He felt the need to draw his attention back to Body and get its attention by YELLING (almost like there’s a chasm between them but they’re actually really close in this constellation) he’s yelling “know your worth” and just that over and over again.

(Which frankly, I’m impressed by).

But Body isn’t listening to him so he just keeps yelling almost desperately? Body image is trying to get his attention but he won’t give it to it.

Body image:

Is annoyed, wants to grab his face and get HC’s eyes back on it. “I own you.”

It’s doing everything it can to get HC to pay attention when his eyes aren’t on it it wants to get abusive.

Like real abusive. Beating him to the ground.

I’ve followed the movement, and HC is on the ground.

It’s crouched over HC now and it’s just belittling him, it’s hammering into him. “Disgusting Pig”. “No one will ever love you what worth do you have.” It’s just laying it on him it’s not kind in anyway, it’s so horrible.

Henry:

Ok this is interesting cause I go back to Henry and I assumed he would be absolutely hurt by this but he’s not.

The feeling is that of an abused kid whose just had enough but can’t leave their parents just yet. like it hurts him emotionally but it’s more of a wince, he’s used to it, and he’s numb to the rest of it. He’s saying to Body image “let me go. Please.” “Please leave me alone you’ve made your point”

There again is almost that feeling of crying but it’s just the base of the emotion it’s not enough to get watery eyes.

Oh. That would make sense.

The good news is that HC doesn’t feel absolutely crippled by this.. he just feels like he’s stuck in an abusive relationship and he knows that he’s stronger than it, and whenever it says he’s disgusting he knows that he’s not. He keeps reiterating that to himself and saying that to body image, but it’s conflicting because he’s also too tired to get up and leave and fully believe it. It’s like eventually the abuse from Body Image wears him down and he knows even if he gets up and fights back it’s just gonna be there the next day wearing him down again.

Ah.

That energy has passed now, he’s sitting back up. He’s still blocked by Body image which is now sitting in front of him, still so close its touching. But Henry is breathing heavy as if he was just in a fight. And this feeling is similar to the last reading, the absolute hopelessness not knowing what to do, deep sighs feeling lost. Disassociating. Just.. over it.

Body:

Ok now body is looking at Henry and it feels so sad over what just transpired and it wants to comfort him but it doesn’t want to piss off body image.

It’s now looking forlorn at HC. And Body finally wants to move away from status/image.

I moved it to where it wanted to be - the edge of the field. And it’s turned around facing status/image and it’s defiant. “You don’t own me”

Body isn’t angry, it’s just defiant and protective. If S/I takes one more step body will bark at it like a ferocious dog. That’s the feeling.

Body is staring S/I down.

Status/Image

S/I didn’t feel anything about Body doing that it just went “ok. I’ll move myself somewhere else then” with a bitchy little smirk.

And placed itself in front of Body image and in between it and HC.

And now status is sitting too. All three of them. Sitting.

Status/image feels like it’s good friends with Body Image.

Henry: With that move, Henry now feels like he’s behind a wall.

A giant Ass brick wall and he can’t see anything beyond it.

Another deep sigh. He’s sick of it.

He’s so tired.

Body Image: Body image feels like S/I is almost like a daughter to it. It’s much younger but it likes status/image there.. in a really mean way, like it keeps looking at HC like 😏 see? How are you going to escape us. And wants to pat S/I’s head.

Body:

Body can’t seem to notice anything around it it’s almost like everything has vanished now because the other three are behind a brick wall and that wall is absolutely invisible to body. Body is just looking around like “well fuck.”

It feels like it has nothing to do now.

(Controversial……. I’m going to place HC’s younger self..)

Younger Self HC

HC’s younger self has placed himself in front of body but further away, he’s shaking and anxious looking at Body. Body feels like it is looming and intimidating but little HC still wants to be friends but not sure how. He’s holding himself like a shy little boy. Head is kind of ducked. And he can’t quite look at Body in the eye. Body needs to make the first move

Body: Body very hesitantly made the first move and knelt in front of little HC. It was kind to him but in a pitying kind of way. It said “hello little one”

And just knelt there. Little HC gave body a hug, and body couldn’t reciprocate its the feeling of when an adult has something devastating and sad to tell the child but hasn’t told him just yet.

Little Henry

Hesitantly hugging Body. Very awkward it’s taking a while to get used to being this close to body.

But when he does get used to it, body feels very warm, very motherly. It feels like a motherly hug.

Still even then the crying feeling is BASE level, not getting watery eyes or anything.

(I need to find where the basis of where this lack of crying is or it’s going to drive me insane.)

I’m leaving it there, as HC has accepted where he is atm, even if it’s behind a wall, he has the same feelings as he did in the last reading, I can’t get those to go away without a constellation, but I felt like there was movement with young HC and body bonding and having a little cuddle.

That’s some healing movement right there

OOO actually let me check how HC feels about young him and body making a nice little movement like that.

Henry:

OH!!!!!?

Ok the brick wall feels like glass now, he can see through it. But he’s got a little smile on his face seeing little him and body having a hug.

He feels like he may be stuck here but at least that happened?

He feels a lot more hopeful and alive than he did the last time I checked on him in this reading.

Awake too.

He doesn’t feel like the two in front of him are even blocking him anymore. Like they are but he feels like he could sneak away..

but he just doesn’t want to just yet he’s too tired he can’t be bothered, but he’s feeling MUCH better now.

He feels hopeful

And that makes him happy. And that’s finally where I will end it.

Guys OMG. POSITIVE MOVEMENT!!!! WE GOT IT!! Note: Ok, I didn’t move tiny henry. tiny henry moved HIMSELF. That’s HC’s little inner self making MOVEMENT. I didn’t facilitate that, that was where the energy wanted to go all on it’s own.

Which is PHENOMENAL AND WONDERFUL NEWS?!?!? Also I have left little HC and Body hugging for the moment cause I feel like that needs to fully integrate. Small movements but HUGE.

#HC #reading

18 notes · View notes

crescentsteel · 4 years

Text

Just Friends - Part 7

plot: fubu set up with Kuroo , model fem reader warnings: sexual tension, slow burn word count: 7.2k

A.N:

- Finally!! I'm so glad to finally release this. October was so hectic and I'm a very slow writer. - I'm so sorry for the mistakes on the previous chapters. No one beta reads for me. So I went back and edited Chapters 3-6. - So sorry for the word vomit on this chapter. I was out of control. - Thank you for all the nice comments!! I swear. They keep me fired up and inspired. - As always, lmk if you want to be tagged in any of my works,

Part 6 | Part 8 | m.list

“No! It’s not what you think!”

Kuroo almost laughs at how cliche you sounded, a typical response of someone who’s been caught red-handed. You’re about to chase Kenma, but he grabs your wrist to stop you.

“Maybe you should wear your shirt before you go after ‘im.” He tries to hide the mirth in his expression and tone. Your face is so red, you look like you’re about to burst. He also doesn’t want to add up more to the awkwardness you might feel later, so he’s gonna let this one slide. He’ll just pretend that the massage thing was as harmless as it should be.

You put your shirt in a jumble and walk briskly to Kenma. He follows at his normal pace, settling behind you when he catches up to you and Kenma.

“Sorry about that,” you laugh nervously. “He was just giving me a back massage.”

It was kinda the truth, but Kenma looks dubious.

“It sounded more than a massage.”

He covers his lips with his back hand so he wouldn’t laugh. Although his rascal self wants to tease you more, he can’t let you feel any more embarrassed than this. He looks at Kenma and shakes his head minutely with a knowing look, hinting not to push the subject any further.

“Naah. Y/n here is just really stressed so she moans like she’s being fucked.” Okay, maybe he couldn’t completely let it slide after all.

You irritatedly look at him and punch his arm with more force than usual. “Piss off,” you hiss.

He dramatically rubs the arm you just hit. “Ow! So violent.”

Kenma ignores the antics and just passes by you two. He’s about to plop himself on the couch, but pauses. He instead gets a chair and seats himself there.

You couldn’t overlook that. Obviously, in Kenma’s mind, you and Kuroo were doing something indecent there so he doesn’t want to be in it. You want to clear it up to Kenma that you really weren’t doing anything of that sort. Well, you were about to pounce on Kuroo, but still, it didn’t actually happen.

In a way, you’re relieved that Kenma interrupted at the right time. You might have done something you will harrowingly regret afterwards.

“Don’t sweat it, y.n. He just misinterpreted it.” Kuroo’s unusually magnanimous today. It’s strange. He wouldn’t have lived this down on a regular day. Maybe it's because of your no sex relationship? Still, this is aberrant of him. He shouldn’t fail to notice how that last moan of yours was not of comfort.

“Right?” He adds, his eyes gauging your own.

So that’s how it is. He is aware. But he’s giving you the option to disregard what just almost happened. You’re relieved, but also confused at the tiny shards of disappointment prickling in your chest. This is what you wanted, for you to avoid sex and Kuroo in the same room. It shouldn’t be confusing.

You look down and break away from the eye contact. You put a hand on your hip and the other on your temple, which then moves to brush your hair back.

With a long, audible puff, you speak.

“Of course, it was nothing,” you return to his gaze with a dry expression to camouflage the lie behind your words. But at the same time, you also wait for him to say something or for his eyes to show something other than indifference. You don’t know what it is you want or expect, but you wait for it. You’ll know it when you see it.

It doesn’t come though as he shrugs it off like it was nothing.

Disappointed, that’s what you are. You don’t like the feeling, but you are.

—

You ring your driver again, hoping that this time he’ll finally answer. If he doesn’t get to you any soon, you’ll be late for your shoot. You can’t be late for this shoot in particular. Mitsuki’s the creative director. She’s a very pleasant one, but she absolutely hates tardiness. No exceptions. She gets all sour and crank when someone’s late.

The other end of the line picks up. “Ms l/n. I’m so sorry. One of the tires got flat. I need to change it, but I’m still stuck in traffic.”

Of all the days to get a flat tire on a heavy traffic, it had to be this day. You exhale heavily to clear the irritation getting under your skin.

“How long before you’re here?”

“I think about an hour, Ms.”

You aren’t the type to get mad at hired help, but you’re really in a pinch. In an hour, you should be in hair and make up already, not arriving only then. Mitsuki gets enraged when someone’s 15 minutes late. To be late an hour, you can’t imagine how she’d be. There’s no way you’re going to wait here for an hour.

“Don’t come anymore. Just get it fixed.” You say coldly before you end the call. It wasn’t the driver’s fault. You wouldn’t bother getting a driver if your car hadn’t been acting up recently. Being dumb this morning, you forgot about your busted car and was late in this morning’s meeting with a client. You found yourself brisk walking in heels at the hotel’s lobby earlier just to save yourself from any more delayed minutes. And now, even your driver’s car is jacked up.

“Y.n?”

You turn around at the recognizable calm voice you heard. It’s Kenma, except he wasn’t alone. Kuroo is right there beside him. It was kind of weird to see them together at this place and both in business wear.

“What’re you two doing here?”

“I’m working with Kenma here to sponsor our next promotional video.”

You just stared at the two of them. You’re used to the three of you just fooling around when you’re together. Meeting like this when you’re all in the middle of doing your jobs is something new to you.

“And who might you be giving a hard time on the phone, hmm y.n.?”

They heard that? They must both be near while you were getting bummed out from being late this morning and potentially late this afternoon.

“Ah! I need to go. My driver can’t make it. I’m going to be late,” you spiral back to your hectic schedule. “Bye.” You give them a quick wave, and despite your heels, you walk as fast as you could towards the entrance of the hotel.

You try to hail cabs that were passing by, but almost every cab was occupied. And for some reason, someone always managed to get the empty cabs before you can even spot them. To worsen your luck, it began to rain. You frantically tap your left foot on the concrete as the panic sets in you.

Mitsuki’s gonna kill me.

You bite your lip and contemplate how you’re going to arrive in the venue on time. The answer you found made you turn back on your heels to go back inside the hotel, only to find them already there behind you.

“You’re here,” you exhale, relieved that they haven’t gone anywhere out of your sight. “I’m in a bind. Can anyone give me a ride?”

The two men exchanged pithy looks, but you don’t bother figuring out what that could’ve meant. You just need the help you typically won’t ask for since you’re always doing things on your own.

“I can’t. I have a stream coming up. Sorry, y.n.” Kenma first spoke. You shift to Kuroo, hoping that he can give you the time of day. “Yea, sure. Am free for the rest of the day actually.” He says with a brief smile.

“Oh, thank God!” The panic and nerves were clearing out of your system. Despite the awkwardness of your previous massage fiasco, right now, you’re glad that he can help.

“Bye, then.” Kenma quickly took his leave as the hotel valet stepped out from his car and handed him his keys.

“Should we go now?” Kuroo asked. “Aren’t we waiting for your car?” “No. I don’t want strangers handling my car.” “Then why did you go here?”

Amusement shows on his face at your question. “I saw your cute attempt to hail a cab. Is that how rich kids do it? Let someone else steal their ride for them?” You smile sweetly, disgustingly sweet, then roll your eyes before saying, “Let’s just go.”

You told him the location of the shoot. The drive was comfortable as you both share work conversations with your usual banters on the side. Being friends with Kuroo is confusing and reassuring at the same time. With the history you two shared, you need to tread the waters of your friendship carefully every once in a while. If it wasn’t the sexual tension, it was the affection you felt towards him that would sometimes seem like resurfacing. Even with all that, you can’t bear to walk away from what you presently have. You feel like you really found genuine company with him and Kenma.

“We’re here. Let me just get an umbrella.” He looks back to the back seat and stretches his right arm to reach for it. The current angle of his face emphasized his sharp jaw and the length of his neck. You were just thinking how you need to tread carefully, but easier said than done when you know exactly how your fingers have grazed that jaw, how your tongue has tasted that neck, and much more.

“What’s taking you so long? I might as well get drenched from the rain,” you snap because you can’t stand your own indecent thoughts.

“Found it.” He says and returns to his normal sitting position. “Why the hell are you suddenly cranky? Geez.” You feel bad for being suddenly grouchy. He was just being nice and you were being nasty for reasons you can’t tell him. “Sorry. Just don’t want to be late,” you apologized.

He shrugs it off nonchalantly. “Hey. Where’s my umbrella?” You ask when you see him reaching for the door with only one umbrella in his hand.

“We’re sharing this. I only have one.”

You purse your lips to the side and sharply avert your eyes elsewhere, your irritation resurfacing again. You feel uncomfortable with the idea of being that physically close to him. You’ve pushed the massage incident behind, but that doesn’t mean you’ve forgotten about it.

“What is up with you? What are you so pissed about?”

“Nothing. Can we go now?”

He stares at you for a good 3 seconds before getting out and opening his umbrella. He moves to your side of the vehicle and opens the door. You get out and try to avoid any raindrops. He closes the door and presses his car keys to lock the vehicle.

You both start to walk towards the entrance of the place. You’ve never felt more awkward in your life. You’re avoiding getting past the edge of the umbrella while also avoiding Kuroo’s body.

“Why is your umbrella so small?”

“The heck are you talkin about? This is the standard size.”

You don’t answer him. The umbrella isn’t small. He’s just huge and his whole body occupied almost all the space under the shade. You flinch when he suddenly grabs you by the shoulder and pulls you close, so close that you can feel the firmness of his body pressed onto yours.

You raise your gaze to him with a raised eyebrow.

“You’re gonna get wet if we don’t huddle closer.” You could accept his reason, if only you didn’t catch the miniscule curl of his lips and the skittish glint in his eyes. It was so typical of him really. Maybe you should stop being so worked up all the time.

“Fine.” Even though he was messing you, you can’t deny that it’s much more comfortable. You’re safe from the rain and his body provided heat from the coldness of the downpour.

He doesn’t do or say anything more as you both get to the doorway of the bar where the shoot will be held. He puts down the umbrella when you reach the shade of the building. Before you’re able to get away from Kuroo’s hold, the door opens. Mitsuki was holding her phone to her ear when she met your eyes.

“I was calling you and you weren’t — oh.” Her eyes flew to the hand on your shoulder and traveled to its owner. “Well, well, y/n. You leave for a good while, then come back loaded.” You can always count on Mitsku to not hold her tongue. You gently release yourself from Kuroo’s hold to avoid looking defensive. “It’s not like that,” was your thrift reply.

“Kuroo, this is Mitsuki, my creative director for today, sometimes my friend too. Mitsuki, this is Kuroo.”

Both of them exchange casual greetings for meeting the first time.

“How come you mention our relationship, but not yours?” referring to you and Kuroo. You sigh. “He’s also a friend.” You turn to Kuroo and thank him for the ride and his time.

“Is your driver picking you up?” he asked.

You seal your eyes shut at your own stupidity. Because you were panicking and irritated, you sent your driver home. You open them again and purse your lips in a straight line. “No. I’ll just take a cab.”

“With your cab-hailing skills in this rain? Good luck with that.” he snorts. “Haha. Real funny.” From the corner of your eyes, you see Mitsuki with an entertained grin on her face, obviously enjoying the exchange between you and Kuroo.

“Call me when you’re done. I’ll come pick you up then.” You want to protest but it will just drag on. You don’t want Mitsuki seeing more of the dynamics of your relationship, so you thriftly say “Okay.”

“Kuroo-san, right?” Both of you shift your attention to Mitsuki. “Actually, we need a male model because the scheduled one today is a total wimp and cancelled last minute.” She shamelessly eyed Kuroo from head to toe. So that’s why she was about to call you. The shoot was cancelled.

When she looks at you, you mouth the word “no” to let her know that she shouldn’t do what you think she’s about to do. The reaction you got was her smiling widening before speaking to Kuroo. “Do you have an agent? Can we talk over the phone right now to discuss?”

That’s when you step forward. “Uhhh. He’s not a model. He used to be a volleyball player, hence the height and build.” You say defensively. You nudge Kuroo with your elbow so that he’ll back you up, but he doesn’t say anything. He’s just there waiting for Mitsuki’s next words.

“An athlete, I see.” She nods approvingly. “That’s perfect! I don’t have to talk to anyone. It’s completely up to you then.”

“Errr. I don’t really know anything about modeling. Sorry.”

Your relief was short-lived when she tugs you to her direction and grips both of your shoulders. “Then your friend here can guide you. She’ll be your co-model anyways.”

He probably figured out by now why you were so apprehensive during the conversation just now. You don’t want him as your co-model.

His grin just confirmed your thoughts. “I’ll go for it then.” His eyes sparkling with mischief made you surrender. You already admit defeat in your head even though the shoot is just about to start.

You both get in hair and makeup. Being a woman, you take longer to finish. The clothes the stylists are arranging on you are taking while as well. They let you wear a very long, elegant gold dress that fits your upper body like your second skin, but the material is flowy from your waist down. When you arrive at the set, he’s already there talking with Mitsuki while waiting for you. Mitsuki notices you first. “Alright! We’re good to go.”

When Kuroo faces you, you almost don’t recognize him. His usual emo bangs were gone. They brushed his hair up cleanly. The suit he was wearing earlier was replaced by gray slacks and white long sleeve polo that has two top buttons open. You have conflicted feelings towards the hair and make up staff that did the work. They did a remarkable job with his overall style. He does look like a model like this. But also, why the hell did they make him look this damn good? The regular Kuroo was bad enough for you.

“This feels weird. I feel like I have too many things on me.” You scowl at his remark. “Too many? Wanna try being a girl?” He’s about to retort but Mitsuki claps twice which calls both of your attention.

“So our client is a liquor brand and the theme is something like wild love at the bar. What I want is you two giving the impression of having a passionate first encounter while you’re out drinking. Give me something and we’ll work it out as we go on, mkay?”

You knew you’d be working with a male model for this brand, but you didn’t expect that they’d go with something like this. You thought it was just going to be glamour shots to showcase the drink.

But what Mitsuki said, ‘Wild love at the bar’?? That is not something you’d want to be doing with him. It reminded you of the first night you met.

“I’m all ears on what to do, y/n” His haughty smile doesn’t help the situation one bit. You take a deep breath. This is not the time to muck around. You’re the experienced one, so you’ll be taking the lead. “Swear to me that you’ll take this seriously.” You glare at him, no trails of humor apparent. The change in his demeanor surprised you. You forgot how intimidating he can get when he’s serious. You’re so used to him being an idiot all the time that it catches you off guard. But for today, you’re glad to have it.

You explain to him how the whole shoot will go. For the first shot, you ask a staff member for a chair and tell Kuroo to sit on it. “Get the glass with the liquor and look at the camera while holding it.” He did as you told, except he has this perplexed look on his face with a noticeable discomfort from the way his lips curled in a corner.

“On second thought, maybe this is a bad idea,” he said after trying the first time. You want to agree with him, but the shoot is already happening. You just want to get over it already since you’re already there. “Nooo. Uh-uh.” Mitsuki’s tone took a sharp turn. She wasn’t happy with what Kuroo said. “Just imagine you’re in a bar, chilling with your favorite drink and you just snagged the hottest girl in the place.”

“Hottest girl aka me,” you comment on her instruction. That seemed to work because he changed back to his normal self and looked at you with amusement. “Just like the night we met, huh?” He said it low enough for only you to hear, but you still glanced nervously to Mitsuki if she caught any of it.

“That’s a nice expression, Kuroo! Keep looking at her like that.” You ease up since it looks like she didn’t hear it. You put your elbow on his shoulder and tilt your hips to give your waist an S curve while angling your body towards him at the same time. You lift your chin up a bit and look at the camera with parted lips.

“Yep. Looking good dear.” Mitsuki signals the photographer to start taking the shots. You both slightly alter your angles so the pose will have variations. Sometimes you look at Kuroo, smile flirtatiously at him, or look at the camera in a sultry way. Every time you two would look at each other, you’d ‘cheat’ and look at the bridge of his nose to give the illusion that you’re actually looking at his eye.

While looking at the shots from a separate screen, she suddenly asks the photographer to stop. You both straighten your bodies while awaiting instructions. “It looks nice,” she said before looking at your direction. “But it’s boring. There’s nothing wild about it.” You space out for a bit because for the first time, you don’t know how to proceed. You’re used to fashion shoots and runway. You’ve never had an ad with this theme. “Y.n, dear, can you be a bit aggressive towards him?”

You raise your eyebrow from disbelief. “A-aggressive?”

Mitsuki nods. “Throw yourself at him, dominate him, take control. mkay?” You feel a bit pressured when she’s just looking at you two and waiting for you to start posing for the camera. You don’t have a solid idea in your head, but you just go for it. You try to prop yourself up on the bar counter, but your dress won’t allow you.

Kuroo notices your dilemma and gets up from his seat. “You could’ve asked for help, you know.” He positions himself in front of you and grabs your waist. His hands were strong yet gentle. With your palms still on the surface of the counter, he lifts you up while you put weight on your arms so you can usher yourself properly. You’ve been deliberately avoiding his gaze, but right now, your eyes are glued to his face.

“Yes. Like that.” You both flick your gaze towards Mitsuki. “Do that.” She instructs the photographer to move the side so the angle of the shot captures you both without him blocking you completely. You realize the position you two have. “I agreed to this to make you uncomfortable, but I’m not gonna lie. I’m the one extremely uncomfortable right now.” Kuroo whispers with a hint of regret on his face. The camera flashes start going off but something clicked between the two of you that you two end up laughing. It’s probably the awkwardness and the nerves that’s been hanging on the air that something so shallow as Kuroo admitting his uneasiness, cracked you both up.

It was just a brief exchange of laughter but you feel relaxed. Even though Mistuki is pretty cool for a creative director, she’s still as serious as any professional. So when you see her smiling as you apologized for the delay, you’re a bit shocked.

“No worries dear. Let’s continue then.”

You feel more confident now. You’re you. The reason you became successful on an international level is because of your professionalism and ability to produce quality results.

From being seated on the counter, you’re a few centimeters taller than Kuroo. That completed the idea in your head. You took the glass drink and placed it on your right hand. “Put your hands on my hips,” you tell him then lightly lift his chin with your index finger, “and look at me like you worship me.” The command earned a raised eyebrow from him but you pay no heed to it.

You extend an arm over his right shoulder, the glass dangling on your fingertips. With your index finger on his chin, you look to the camera with provocative eyes. If anything looks wrong with Kuroo, you’ll just let Mitsuki handle it. After all, she’s the one who asked him to be a part of this.

“Oh yea! That’s really good.” Compared to before, she looks pleased with the shots now. The pose was captured a few times before she speaks again. “Instead of using your finger, grab his hair to tilt his head back.” You comply immediately and tugs his locks downwards. You might’ve done it a bit rougher than you wanted because you heard a raspy grunt from his throat. You got distracted, so instead of looking at the camera, you look at him.

You regret it. When you said he should look at you with worship, you didn’t think he’d do it this well. Because his hair is pushed completely all the way back, you see every aspect of his face. Nothing was blocking his eyes that were full of yearning and desire. He’s looking at you like you’re not just the hottest girl in the bar, but the most beautiful person he’s ever laid eyes one.

“Pull him closer and look here y.n.” You do as you’re told, thankful that you needed to look somewhere else. “Damn. You two look so good right now.” She gently claps her hands while looking at the monitor.

“I’m already satisfied, but let’s just do one more for another option. Umm, Kuroo. You be the aggressor this time. Y/n, …. you know what to do.” She winks after.

Well, not really you don’t. She just wants you to do the thinking on what to do. You put the glass down and put both your hands on his shoulders. “Help me down?” You ask with an easygoing smile. You don’t want to ruin the momentum of the shoot, so you decide to be nice to him for now.

“You got it,” then his hand travels up your waist and guides you down back to the floor. You tell him to lean on the counter. He follows with no complaints. You get his arm and ushers him to wrap it on your waist. When he goes along with your silent instruction, you raise your leg to his side.

“Tug my skirt up to my thighs.”

He doesn’t react and just squints at you.. “Huh?” Since he did not grasp what you meant, you take it to yourself to do it and slowly gather the material at the ends. Then, you yank it up to your thigh. “Get it?” He whistles as he gets the cloth from your hands. “Hey. Don’t do that. If you’re a real model, you’d be in trouble if I report that behavior.”

“But I’m not a real model, am I?” You glare at his provocation. You won’t be having any of his crap at your workplace. “Kuroo,” you say with a menacing glare and he immediately gets the threat behind it. “My bad, my bad. I’ll behave again, kay? Stop scowling now.” You relax your face and take a deep breath. “Moving on then.” You enclose your left arm on his neck while you plant your right on his chest. You don’t want to direct him any further than this. If this is unsatisfactory, Mitsuki will say something.

Aaaand she does. “Kuroo-san. Aggressive please. Own her. You don’t want her to get away from you.” Upon hearing Mitsuki’s additional instructions, everything about him intensifies three folds. He pulls you even closer, causing your breath to hitch when his face is dangerously near yours all of a sudden. His sleeves don’t do anything to mask the firmness of his arms. And even with the velvet fabric, you can still the strength of his thighs as they’re pinned on yours. The heat of his hand ignited the skin of your thigh as he clutched the fabric and your flesh forcefully. And his eyes, they no longer worship you. They spoke of something similar, but not quite.

He wants to devour you whole.

It was too overwhelming for you, so you look away and close your eyes dramatically to make it seem like you’re being swept away in the moment. After one camera flash, “Okay dear, but I need you to look at him this time.”

The few seconds of breaking away from his fiery stare did you some good. You were able to collect yourself again, but not enough to truly look at him. You just focus your gaze right between his eyes as you did earlier.

“Nooo. When I said look at him, I meant really look at him. Respond with your own passion. You’re looking a bit of a scared vegetable right now, honey.” You’ve never had feedback like that in forever. Maybe when you tried modeling the first few months, you received something similar to that. But never when you started doing it full time.

You don’t want to, but you have to. You finally meet his gaze and tap into something inside yourself that you’ve been holding back. You let your desire for him deluge you, let it surge through your veins until you’re aching for him. You push yourself even closer to him, not allowing even air to pass between your bodies.

“Yes! YES! You want him so much, but you shouldn’t.”

It was just as she said. You want him so much, so much that it almost hurts. You part your lips slightly as you get lost in the moment.

“Oh my God.” Her words sounded distant. It was there. You can hear it, but what clouded your senses was your heart pounding hard against your chest, his hot breath mingling with yours, and the way his eyes are now devoted to your lips. Not long after, he angles his face so that your lips are almost touching. Just a tiptoe and a kiss will already take place. You clench your fingers on his shirt, holding yourself back from that one tiny push that will allow you to feel his lips on yours again.

“Holy Shit! HOLY SHIT! That was it. That was the money shot.” Mitsuki’s shrill voice which was followed by her squeal broke the trance you were in. You know what she meant. The shoot is done. Yet, you still feel hot. The heated atmosphere around you two still hasn’t caved in. He let go of your thigh as you put some space away from him. You settle your hands on his shoulders while you rest your forehead on his chest. He doesn’t move either. His hand remains on your waist, but without the force this time. With his other hand, he caringly skims the curve of your shoulder.

“You okay, kitten?”

His voice is so gentle, you nearly convince yourself that it sounded loving. You nod weakly before heading back to the dressing room without saying anything.

Kuroo’s gaze followed your back as you disappeared. He was amazed but also bothered at what just happened. You looked really into it, like you really wanted him. If the shoot didn’t finish any sooner, he might have closed that tiny gap that separated your lips from his. He’s been aching for you for so long that his control is slipping inch by inch every time there’s an opportunity to cross that line of friendship you set. When he saw you let go and completely relent within his hold, it was maddening at how he couldn’t have you at the moment. What’s worse is that even without the glamorous set, he knows you’re still not his to have.

He walks towards the room where his clothes were hung and changes back to his usual suit. He asked the make up staff to remove everything on his face. He doesn’t like the feeling of having a layer of cosmetics on his skin. The hair they couldn’t do anything about because they used a lot of product to fix it up.

When he gets out of the room, Mitsuki approaches him with a satisfied look on her face

“You did so well for someone with no experience at all. Do you have a card? I can hook you up for other gigs. You’ll do great.”

He smiles graciously at her generous offer, but he doesn’t want it. “Sorry, but I’m not really interested. I only did it cause it was her.” He said truthfully. Mitsuki’s mouth curled in amusement. “You know, y.n’s really good to work with. She always had this cool facade that never went down, and it works for her. We love her for it. But today,” she pauses as she gives him a meaningful look. “I’ve never seen her show such vulnerability and rawness. It was,” she sighs with admiration for you.

“Beautiful, wasn’t it?” He knows exactly what she’s saying. After all, he has seen several times how captivating your authenticity can be.

“Soo, are you two dating or what?” Her eyebrows twitch up and down from anticipation at what he’s about to answer. He badly wants to say yes, but he doesn’t have that luxury. “Naaah. Like she said, I’m just a friend.”

She’s obviously dissatisfied with his response. He is too, but that’s the lousy truth. Out of the blue, she takes her phone out. “Too bad though. You two looked really good here.” She showed him the photo and it was you and him earlier. You were seated in the counter with your arms on his shoulders and his hands on your waist. It was when you were both laughing at his stupid statement.

“Can you send me that photo?”

“Why should I?”

He’s well aware of what she’s trying to do. It’s a business transaction, except for the lack of formality. She wants to get something in return, and he knows exactly what it is.

“You’re good.” He admits with an impressed glint in his eyes.

“I am. So what’ll it be?” He knows that she knows she has the upperhand of the negotiation. She could probably tell that there’s something going on with the two of you. It’s just a matter of deciding which information to give her. But he didn’t have the fortune of having too many options. He didn’t want to reveal the nature of your relationship before. He wasn’t sure of your feelings for him. He can only speak for himself.

“Fine. I sorta like her.”

Her eyes brighten up. “Aha! I knew it. You should totally ask her out, kay? You’re gonna have tall and beautiful babies.” She put one hand on her cheek and closed her eyes while screeching at her own daydream of you and him getting together. When she calms down, she sends you the image file. “For real though. I’ve never seen her like that,” she points to your dazzling face in laughter in the photo.

“Hey. What’re you two talking about?” You’re back to your normal clothes, but your hair and makeup was still there.

“Nothing. Let’s go now?” He spoke immediately before your nosy director could say something. He walks to your direction before heading out together. “Bye! Update me, Kuroo-san!” Mitsuki said as she waved goodbye. You couldn’t help but be curious on what he should update her about.

The rain stopped so no more umbrella horseplay. When you both get inside his car, you immediately ask him, “What was that about?”

“Uhh. She asked if I wanted to do other modeling projects.”

“Do you?”

He didn’t hesitate before answering, “No. That sort of stuff is not for me. I only did it to piss you off.” He starts the engine, then pivots his body to face you. “I must say though. I enjoyed seeing you eyefuck me.” Just when you are getting used to the peaceful, non-smug Kuroo, his true personality kicks right back in. Good thing you took your time getting changed and basically just calmed yourself down.

“Glad you did. That’s the most you can get from me after all.”

His smile turned upside down at your remark. “Tch.” Your lips tug upwards at the side from his lack of retaliation.

“I haven’t told you yet, but it wasn’t my first modeling experience.”

You’re a bit surprised. Even though he has the appearance of a model, you didn’t think he’d do it. You agree with what he said just a while ago. It wasn’t for him. He’s best at his job right now.

He gets his phone and scrolls up. He must be looking for a photo to show you as proof. When you see his screen, your heart swells. It was you and him a year ago. The neckline of your shirt was pulled to your shoulder for a makeshift off-shoulder while he knotted his t-shirt to form a crop top. You two wore large smiles while posing silly in front of the cam. It was right after when you told him that you’re a model.

“I- you... umm. You kept these?” You swipe the screen and see every single photo you took that day. Not one was deleted. You remember the laughter and absurd joy behind each frame.

“Yea. Why wouldn’t I?”

One more swipe and there’s no other photo after yours. That’s when you notice that the photos are in the Favorites album. You felt like you were about to tear up. You’ve never felt so cherished in your whole life. Even though you left without saying a proper goodbye and no indication of going back, he still kept them. You tried so hard to forget about him, yet there he was, keeping these small tokens of what you had - proof that you really had been a part of his life.You felt something inside you crumble piece by piece. You should be scared, but at the moment, you don’t feel any fear. Instead, you were enraptured.

You can feel your cheeks hurting from how wide your grin is. You don’t bother hiding it from him.

��Can you send these to me?” You turn to him with the smile still plastered on your face, but he frowns at your question.

“Those photos came from you.”

You look back at his phone, your big smile reduced into a faint one that’s traced with melancholy. “I deleted them when I went to the US.” If he asks why, you wouldn’t know how to answer. Fortunately, he doesn’t. He gets his phone back from your hand and fiddles with it a bit. A few seconds later, you hear a notification from your own phone. When you open it, all the photos are sent to you.

He looks at you warmly, his face devoid of anything but heartfelt fondness. “There. Like you never got rid of them.”

---

You lie on your bed with bottomless thoughts that night. Kuroo’s words weighed more than they should in your head as you stare at the photos.

You deleted them to completely erase any trace of his existence in your life. Now they’re back in your phone with not a single photo missing from the stack. Ironically, it’s also you who asked for them back. Yet, you don’t mind. You came to accept that those memories existed. They happened. There’s no use trying to forget they did when he’s already back in your life anyways.

Looking at you and Kuroo in the images, you can’t avoid thinking how simple those times were. You were just two cool people who had sex for fun. You had no clue things would happen as they did - falling for him, leaving, and for some reason - destiny or whatever, meeting him again. The past you tried to leave behind crept up to you and there wasn’t anything you could do about it.

You thought you’ve moved on. You’ve thoroughly convinced yourself that you’ve disposed of all unnecessary emotions that involved Kuroo. You thought that whatever it is that you felt when you met him again was just remnants of yesterday. You were so wrong. That‘s just what you tried to tell yourself, repeating the idea over and over in your head until you believed it.

But it never really happened. You haven’t forgotten about him. When you went on dates in the U.S., you’d remember him. So you stopped trying to see anyone and attributed that to being scared of getting hurt again. Hence, you shut yourself out to anyone until you no longer found dating to be interesting. You told yourself getting in a relationship would just get in the way of your career.

That wasn’t true.

The truth is just as he said. Your feelings for him are still there, you never did get rid of them. The question now is how to proceed from here.

You jerk when your phone rings right at your hand.

‘Kuroo’

You don’t want to answer it. You basically just admitted to yourself that you’re still in love with him. Hearing his voice right now would be dangerous for your fragile heart.

But it might be something important. He doesn’t usually call.

You press the answer button. You were about to say hello, but your heart was beating so fast that you were unable to get any word out.

“Hello?”

You swallowed the lump in your throat so you could speak. “Yeah?”

“Is something wrong? You sound a bit off?” How he could tell even through a phone call is unbelievable. “Everything’s fine. Why’d you call anyways?” You do your best to sound normal. “Block your Thursday next week. I’m throwing a party.”

“What for?”

“Mmm. Just felt like having one.”

You minimize the call to check your calendar if you had any plans that day. “Alright. I have an event in the morning, but that night’s free.”

“Nice!!” He sounded a bit too glad.

“Is that why you called?” It’s a bit suspicious that he rang you just for that. It’s just a party. He could’ve texted you instead.

“Why? Am I not allowed to call when I want to?” Your heart skips a beat from the playful tone in his voice. You picture him smirking on his phone while he’s lying in bed. You bite your lip at the image in your head.

Screw you and your stupid imagination.

“Good night, Kuroo.” You said dismissively. It doesn’t seem like he’s going to say anything else important anyways. He chuckles from the other line before speaking so ever softly with tenderness that gives you butterflies in your stomach.

“Good night, kitten.”

It was just a simple good night but you were reeling. You fight the smile that was forcing itself to form on your lips. You look at your photos one more time and sigh.

You are so in love with him.

On the other end, Kuroo is all smiles to himself. Nothing beats hearing your voice after a long day. Once again, he stares at the photo Mitsuki gave him that afternoon. He wishes it was real. He wishes you were smiling for him, laughing with him, and happy with him. If only you gave any indication that you like him more than a friend, he would’ve made his move.

Even though he knows you still desire him, he wouldn’t settle for just sex. He doesn’t want a repeat of the past. He wants something further than that and more importantly, you deserve better than that. But so far, he could tell you were enjoying the friendship and companionship only. Even if he wanted to take things forward, he’s not sure that that’s what you want. You haven’t given anything away for him to make his move. He doesn’t want to risk it and have you running for the hills.

Will he ever make you fall for him? Should he just leave things as is or do something bolder for you to realize that to him, you’re not just a friend?

He sighs.

He’s so in love with you.

Part 6 | Part 8 | m.list

taglist: @lia-faerie-queen @mkkhaikyuu @fastidious-and-precise @winunk @feelkindahorny @cece-lives-here @babythotshq @arendizzle

#kuroo x reader #kuroo x y/n #kuroo tetsuro x reader #kuroo fanfiction #kuroo smut #kuroo tetsuro smut #haikyuu kuroo #haikyuu x reader #haikyuu fanfiction #kuroo fluff #kuroo tetsuro x you #haikyuu imagines

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bedtimebrain · 3 years

Text

EXO D.O.: A Little Jealous Part 2! (Your POV)

This part 2 took me really long to get it out. I had initially written it in both Ksoo and Your ‘pov’ in one post. But it got too long! So i decided to change it to just your POV(the norm). I still haven’t decided if i should finish the one on Ksoo’s POV.

Edit: I continued Ksoo’s for fun without the intention to finish it, but I think it turned out pretty decent! So His POV’s part is also up now!!

Part 1 Part 2 Ksoo POV Characters: DKS x reader (+exo & random chr)

————-

Back at the team dinner

At the center of the circle, the bottle spun to minho.

‘Truth or dare!’

‘Truth’

‘Ok so, the team has been really curious. WHEN DID YOU AND Y/N STARTED DATING?!’ Ji Hye asked like she has been holding this in for 10 years.

The both of you were a little taken aback at the question, looking over at each other with a laugh.

‘We are just friends, what gave you that impression? We never dated and will never date guys’ Minho answered

‘No way! You guys definitely look like a couple!’

‘Comeon say the truth y/n! You guys are always hanging out together, i even saw you carrying y/n’s bag for you today’

‘yes yes! Weren’t you both holding hands that day?’

Everyone chimed in disbelief.

‘Didn’t know we appeared this way to you guys. Anyway I was just holding y/n hand to shake off this guy who has been bothering her. And I was just helping Y/N with her bag because she looked like she might die anytime just now’

While everyone was sighing and expressing their disappointment, minho made the next spin. You rolled your eyes at minho when it pointed to you.

You picked dare, wanting to divert the team’s attention to something else instead.

‘Ok then, pick from the dare box.’ You reached your hand into it and pulled out a purple strip.

‘Take a selfie with the person from the previous turn and upload to instagram with the caption ‘a cute us’

You almost had a heart attack reading that, this just fueled everyone’s enthusiasm even more.

Although you knew that kyungsoo probably won’t see this since he doesn’t have instagram, you can’t help but feel guilty and worried about it. You’re attached! (Though you can’t say it) and doing this just doesn’t seem right..

There’s absolutely no way you could get out of this. Denying doing this just makes things seem more suspicious between the both of you.

Making it fast ,you did the dare and uploaded the picture. Totally forgetting the fact that other members followed you with their privates. You told yourself in 10minutes you’re getting out of here and deleting that photo.

-----

As usual, minho sent you back. After such a long day you can’t wait to just take a shower and flop down on your bed.

Heading to the shower, you screamed at the sight of a bug.

Running to your phone you sent a SOS to minho,

‘THERE’S A BUG PLEASE COME BACK AND SAVE ME I DONT CARE WHERE YOU ARE’

Just 2 minutes later the bell rang. That was certainly a little fast, you thought to yourself.

Running to the door, you shouted ‘MINHO YA!’ Opening the door, you were surprised to see kyungsoo’s face instead.

'Oppa, why you here ? Did your photoshoot end early? You didn’t text me back tho...’

‘Uh are you expecting someone? Minho?’

‘Oh right, speaking of which I dont need him now, let me drop him a text. Oppa come in and kill the bug for me please!!’ You dragged him right to your shower and stayed far away while he rid the bug for you.

After the bug extermination, you can’t help but sense something’s not too right with kyungsoo tonight.

Hoping to loosen his seemingly tense frame, you reached out to hug him

‘Thank you, for killing the bug’ at the same time flashing him your sweetest smile.

Sitting down and linking your arms in his on the sofa, you asked,

‘Oppa, do you have something to tell me? You don’t look particularly excited or happy to be here today’

Kyungsoo looked to you, and for a good while, did not say anything. Instead, breaking the body contact, he reached for the glass of water on the coffee table; gulping it down as if it was his courage portion.

‘I saw that picture. The one on instagram.’

Your heart stopped, a wave of guilt washed over you as you started to explain yourself

‘Ah that.. sorry oppa, it was a dare I had to do at the team dinner, I tried so hard to avoid it but I couldn’t say I was attached either.. ’

‘But the string of comments sure made it sound like you guys are the most popular ship in your school?’ Kyungsoo replied with distaste lacing his voice

It dawned on you that you had never shown minho’s picture to kyungsoo, perhaps that’s why he was so upset about this. He must have thought the guy in the picture was someone special to you that you never mentioned.

‘Oppa that’s actually Minho in the picture. And you know we are just really close friends.’

At this Kyungsoo looked a little stunned. You could tell he was in the midst of processing his thoughts as a frown started to form on his forehead.

‘I don’t really like you hanging out with minho.’ Kyungsoo blurted out

Now, you didn’t really understand the situation. What’s with kyungsoo acting like a possessive boyfriend?

‘You were always okay with minho and i hanging out. Why does us taking a picture change that ?’ You were a little irritated, you stood up and started raising your voice.

Seeing that you absolutely lost your cool, kyungsoo didn’t hold back either

‘y/n do you know how i felt looking at those comments?! I am not okay with the whole school thinking you both are together when you’re supposed to be my girlfriend!’, he got up from the sofa in frustration

‘Ya! Even if i am not friends with minho, I can’t always avoid such situations! Because i can’t tell anyone i’m attached, guys still hit on me and people think they can pair me up with random guys because they think i’m single!

To me, they can think whatever they want but minho is just a friend. Oppa, shouldn’t you of all people understand this the most?’

‘You’re asking me to understand when minho actually looks your ideal type? And i never knew about it?’

You were caught off guard at this question. Your ideal type? Tall, well built, sporty , fun... Suddenly realising minho does fit the bill for your ideal type.

Though feeling a little bad now, you were not going to give in to this ridiculous argument. Your friendship with minho was on the line.

‘My ideal type? If we wanted to get together, we would have long ago ok! Why would I get together with you then him?!’

You both stayed silent for a little while, turning your backs on each other at the peak of the argument.

Calming down, you told yourself this could go on and on tonight, or you could just take a softer approach towards your boyfriend.

Out of love, you put aside your frustration and hugged him instead. Leaning into his chest, you didn’t know exactly what to say either.

Dropping to his low voice, kyungsoo muttered ‘When I saw that picture, it felt like my nightmare came true. Every night i get worried that you would one day get tired of dating an idol.. Or even dating someone like me..’

You never knew kyungsoo felt this way, he was never particularly expressive in the relationship. You knew he liked you and genuinely cared for you, but you never knew he loved you this much.

‘we don’t spend alot of time together but you always get to be with minho.. so much that people think you’re both attached..’

At this point, you saw through him. You came to understand the picture triggered his insecurities and manifested as jealousy.

You pulled him back down on the sofa and started

‘oppa, i cannot promise you people will stop misunderstanding minho and i, but i will be more careful to draw a clearer line in our friendship for you.

and i never thought of minho as my ideal type or saw him in a way more than friends. i know it might not put you at ease hearing me say this, but can you trust me?

I have been friends with minho for many years and have met many guys too. But it’s you for me ok?’ you held onto his arm and looked in his eyes saying this, hoping he sees what you feel for him.

Poking him at his little belly, you continued light heartedly

‘though you may not be the most attractive looking man out there...’ causing him to look up at you as you say it.

Giving him a peck on the cheek you continued

‘but you make me feel comfortable and special all at the same time. saranghae oppa, you’re the only one.’

At your words, he pulled you closer and rested his chin on your head, saying

‘ Though i still don’t feel the best about our situation and about minho, but i know we can’t help this.. Just promise to stay with me please’

Raising your pinky finger and turning up to face him,

‘ i promise you oppa!’

Linking your pinkies together, kyungsoo finally smiled back at you today and said

‘na do saranghae’ didn’t really turn out the way i thought it would for a jealousy story, haha. but still hope you enjoyed it!

on a side note, im thinking of doing this scenario for baekhyun too! i think his might be much easier to imagine, hahha. if you’re a baek fan please don’t expect too much tho! it won’t be as long as ksoo’s if i actually do it~

#do kyungsoo #kyungsoo #exo #exo d.o.#exo scenario #exo scenarios #kyungsoo scenarios #d.o. scenarios #kyungsoo jealous #fanfic #exo jealous #exo kyungsoo #exo fanfic #exo fluff

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haechanplsacceptmylove · 4 years

Text

Regret pt.4 (final)

Part one 🍓 part two 🍓 part three 🍓 part four 🍓

Warning(s): smut ( ͡° ͜ʖ ͡°)

A/n: omfg finally im posting this, I couldn’t upload this from my phone so I gave up and used my laptot, guys the editing is bad cuz idk how this aMaZing app works on pc. Anyway this is the last part!!! I hope you like it omg. Now I’ll be waiting for you requests!!! I write about anyone, don’t be scared and just request uwu.

You wake up at the feeling of the sun warming your face and check the time "oh shit it's already 11pm" you get up quickly and go take a shower. You do your morning routine and prepare breakfast. "morning" your best friend Mina says walking with her eyes half open "morning lazyass" you chuckle and tell her the breakfast is ready.

You decided to put on some music from the speakers while you eat and chat. After a couple songs NCT DREAM's Ridin starts playing and you stop eating, looking emotionless at your food, flashbacks filling your head. Your friend quickly changes the song feeling guilty for not checking the playlist before putting it on play. You look at her giving her a faint smile "their new album is pretty good.." she looks at you not knowing what to say. "should I agree or change the topic" she thinks to herself looking at you confused , "Mina!" you startle her and chuckle "your food is getting cold, eat! I didn't cook it to be thrown away" you say and she nods and continues eating.

It's been almost 2 months since what happened. You both never talked after that night. After crying your eyes out everyday and night for a whole 3 weeks, you decided to get out of the sorrow you're in and get a hold of your life especially when your comeback was very near, you thought that working hard and for yourself and your members and fans was more important and so you continued on living trying to not think about the whole incident, which was obviously pretty hard. You missed each other so much but you both were too hurt, you were afraid that staying together will hurt more than letting go of each other. Your band had a comeback last month and you're more than thankful that you both didn’t have a comeback at the same time, otherwise you would've had to promote together. You congratulated the nct members for their comeback , except of course Haechan. You're still in contact with the members, and they believe that there was a misunderstanding between you two so they also were trying their best to talk to Haechan about it whenever they get the time. After that incident Mino apologised to you and promised you to make things right. Well you also feel guilty about it so you forgave him, not wanting to lose such an important person again. -meanwhile- The dreamies are all sitting in the dressing room watching their comeback performance. "yo hyuck did you make your mind?" Jaemin whispers to Haechan but of course the other members heard him and switched their attention on Haechan who's now looking at his bubble tea thinking deeply. He sighs "I don't know..." "c'mon man they did wrong but you know damn well y/n was completely not in her right mind!" Chenle says "that's right, and you know how easily y/n gets drunk and how clumsy she could be" Renjun adds and the others nod. One month ago Mino finally had the chance to meet Haechan after getting rejected numerous times, and he finally explained everything to him, from the beginning till the very end and took the blame for starting it. "I know y/n didn't understand what she was saying nor doing and i knew she didn't mean anything of it but i was just.... I just really missed her. I know that was very selfish of me but it's not her fault! I was wrong, i made a mistake, please don't hurt y/n more, she's already broken i can't see her like that" Mino says in one go afraid he'd get interrupted again and ending up in another misunderstanding. After that, Haechan had been thinking about it and he decided to forgive you, after all he loved you more than himself, you were his everything. But he was afraid he hurt you too much, not forgetting how you once told him "when someone hurts me... I usually automatically start building hate towards them so my good feelings end towards them and I can live without being or getting hurt anymore, that how my escape or fight-mode works" you told him after getting out of your toxic relationship. Haechan just couldn't stop thinking about that and kept getting more scared everyday thinking that your hate towards him is growing more and more everyday. ----------- "you look gorgeous" you stylist looks at you mouth open. You had a yellow crop top that showed your shoulders and black mini pencil skirt, with yellow and black thigh high boots. You looked gorgeous, everyone looked at you in awe, especially when it was your first time wearing yellow in such an event. You're on an award show, where basically all the artists are attending and especially the band where's also your boyfriend, or ex-boyfriend. "wait let me put this necklace, it suits your outfit very well" your stylist says going behind you, you look in the mirror and see her putting on the sunflower necklace Haechan gave you on your first date after getting officially together, long time ago. You hold the necklace and hesitate "what's wrong? You don't like it??" your stylist says and you shake your head "oh no.. Bu- nothing it's pretty" you smile and she nods putting it on around your exposed neck. Your members look at you in awe "y/n you look- wow you're really gonna be the prettiest in this event" "i know rightt! Ugh I'm jealous" your members whine and you chuckle. You were the last band to enter the hall and everyone stood up bowing to you and you doing the same to them. Your table was near NCT's and you feel yourself getting nervous. You sit down and start chatting with redvelvet members who were sitting with your band in the same table. You feel someone's gaze on you and automatically turn your gaze to meet his, Haechan's. As soon as he realises you're looking at him he looks away and you do the same. He was looking extremely handsome that night, "a whole snack" you thought to yourself. It's been already 45 min in the event and you just can't hold it in anymore. You and Haechan keep gazing at each other, until you both finally hold eye contact that lasts 5 seconds. You look away and sigh getting up and walking past NCT's table towards the backstage. Haechan's eyes follow you and see where you're going. You go backstage and walk till you reach the cafeteria that's made for idols. You buy a water bottle and drink it. Suddenly you feel someone grabbing your wrist and pulling you to the nearest empty dark room. As soon as the door closes you're pinned on it. Thanking god for the open window where the moon's light is shining through, you could see who it was. The one and only, the boy who owns your heart and your soul, the one who completely owns you; Lee Donghyuck. His face is so close to yours as you can feel his breath on your lips, he looks at your mouth and back at your eyes, then he scans your face, the face he's been missing for the past 2 months; 60 days; 1440 hours. Without words he leans in slowly, making sure to give you the time to react and stop him before he does what he's about to do, but you don't do anything, instead you grab him by his collar and pull him in for a kiss. A kiss full of emotions, sadness, hatred, happiness. Soon the slow kiss turns into a heated hungry make out, you both pull away panting and holding an eye contact. "I fucking missed you" he says leaning his forehead onto yours. "i missed you too, hyuck, so much" you say closing your eyes, you soon feel his lips back onto yours and you start another make out session wrapping your arms around his neck, pulling his hair. He moans in the kiss, damn he missed you, everything about you. Your smell, your taste, your voice, your smile, your moves, everything. Haechan's hands move from your waist to your ass, giving is a small squeeze as his hands then slide down to your thighs to pull you up. You jump and wrap your legs around his waist not breaking the kiss. Haechan places you on the nearest table and lets you sit on it, he moves from your mouth to kiss your jawline down to your neck and collarbones till he reaches your necklace. His eyes glows as he chuckles and kisses your necklace and your chest area around the necklace. He leans back and looks at you "you're gorgeous" he pulls you into another kiss but now you can feel his apologies in it, his regrets and his sorrow. You feel as tears stream down your face he pulls back and holds your cheek wiping your tears "I'm sorry, I'm sorry, I'm sorry" he says now tears streaming down his cheeks too. You hold his cheeks "Sorry Donghyuck, forgive me I was so stupi-" he interrupts you "shhhh i can't stay mad at my baby for a long time you know" he chuckles and gives you one last kiss before kissing down your chest, pulling down your top, showing your breasts and he wastes no time to attack them, sucking on them as if his life depends on it. You let out a whimper and hold pull on his hair, letting your head fall back and arching your back. His hands go down to your boots and zips them off, massaging your bare legs, not letting go of your nipples. You feel your nipples getting numb and moan loud trying to pull your chest out of Haechan's mouth and he pulls away kissing down your clothed stomach reaching your sensitive clothed clit. He pulls your legs putting them on his shoulders pulling your skirt up and taking your pants off, attacking your sensitive nerves immediately and you let out a moan putting your hand on your mouth right after. Haechan groans knowing he won't be able to hear you moan since people could be anywhere out there. He eats you out, giving you full satisfaction as you arch your back and hold his head pushing him deeper "ah fuck hyuck! I'm-im close" your back is about to break arching trying to reach your long waited climax. Just about when you reach it, Haechan pulls away and you whine at the cold feeling. Haechan looks at you smirking zipping his pants off and freeing his thick dick, you bite your lips as soon as your eyes lay on his thick member, feeling the saliva in your mouth you just want to get on your knees right now and give him the best suck but his chuckle wakes you up from your dreamland, "already feeling hungry baby?" he says. "I want to suck you" you say straightforwardly and he nods "I'll remember that and make sure you keep your promise" he says and slams into you. "Ah!" you let out a loud moan "fuck you're big" you say panting and he chuckles "it's not like it's your first time having me inside you" he kisses you jaw waiting for you to adjust but you start immediately moving your hips "needy aren't we" he smirks "just move- fuck!" he interrupts you with a harsh thrust, another and another until he's thrusting at a fast rhythmical pace. You try to keep you moans in, he pulls you closer and you put your legs around his hips, making him go deeper and hit that perfect spot making you a moaning mess "fuck it" you think and let go of your mouth hugging Haechan biting his shoulder and moaning. Haechan on the other side keeps groaning in your ear as he bites and sucks on your sensitive neck, leaving red and purple marks that will definitely cause you troubles with your stylist. "fuck babygirl you're so tight" he whispers growling sending goosebumps down your spine "only for you daddy" you say feeling yourself getting closer to your lost climax and arch your back "ah fuck im close!" you moan and his thrusts get faster if that's even possible "fuck me too baby let's do it at the same time" he kisses you swallowing each other's moans as you reach your climax and soon you feel his hot cum filling you up. You ride your orgasms and lean your foreheads on eachother's. "I love you y/n" "I love you Hyuck" you smile at each other still panting feeling him getting softer in you. "Okay are you done now? Get out it's our time to perform" you hear a knock and Jaemin's voice, and dreamies' chuckles.

"they'll never stop teasing us" hyuck says and you laugh putting your clothes on and getting out of the room hand in hand, face red. You see the dreamies smirking at you both and shaking their heads. "you hornyass nasties!" Jisung yells in disgust and they chuckle.

"Y/N!!!!!!! WHAT'S ON YOUR NECK" you hear your stylist yell and you swear under your breath. Well you both got in trouble in that event but you didn't forget your promise later that night ( ͡° ͜ʖ ͡°)

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writing-for-me-at-this-point · 4 years

Text

Forever | Alucard | Yandere

Request: Can i request castlevainas alucard as a yandere?

Word Count: 1,602 words

Page Count: 4.5 pages

A/n: hope you enjoy, it was my first yandere request and i hope it lives up to standards! AND I THINK I SPELLED ADRIEN AS ADRIAN FUCK IM SORRY LMAO.

Tags: none :)

It had been months since the decaying corpses in the front of the castle had dissipated into nothing but bone, two lone bodies forever impaled next to one another, a reminder and a warning. A reminder of the cruelties humanity has birthed and a warning to those who wish to follow in their footsteps- leading many astray from the castle and it's inhabitant, in fear of Dracula's return or the eternal echo of his being being trapped to roam the halls, impaling those who he deems unworthy.

Giggles can he heard echoing through the castle, though soft, they're there. A young woman laughs, a baby's innocent babbles that light up a room are there too, and a man- his chuckles only deepened as they continued. Inside, the woman ran through the castle, her giggles only fueled the others, and a young child no older than one or two years of age rode on the shoulders of the honey-eyed man.

The two came into his life during the darkest moments, the young woman named [ Y/n ] ignored the warning left on his land, running up to the door and banging on it with the hilt of a whip- her baby wailing as fear over took her. Opened his castle to her, and as he watched the doors close, his eyes met those of a woman whose soul was filled with venom that watched from the treeline. He had helped you once he noticed the pool of blood surrounding you, assisting you stand as he noticed dizziness starting to over take you, mindful of the child who's cries now started to calm.

Large slashes crossed her back, her wrists were raw and her legs were scarred. The infant, who matched your [ S/c ] tone, yet held the deepest brown eyes looked to him, as if begging Alucard to help them.

He was careful around both of them, helping [ Y/n ] as she healed and searched the land for the other woman he saw, but never found a trace of her yet. As [ Y/n ] started to heal, he would keep her company while she started to move around more and more, often speaking with her while she fed her son- making Alucard flush slightly at how she seemed to reject modesty and be fairly comfortable with exposing a moment like this to him. He found out that her sons name was Damien and was the product of a romance with her mistress's son, who she had been working for as a maid, and once the woman found out she wasn't all too pleased- hence the slashes across her back and arms, and the whip she managed to grab along with her child before she ran.

*****

"And that is how I managed to run, all the way here, I..." She seemed to trail off, looking down at her son who continued to suckle, uncaring of anything and only longing for the nurturing hand his mother gave, before her eyes trailed up to Alucards, a small frown forming on her face.

"I am sorry for the trouble I caused. Once I am healed, I can leave immediately, or perhaps work for you in return?" She asked, staring into the amazed pools of honey once again, confused why he looked almost appalled at the idea.

"That would never be necessary. You can stay as you please, I- I myself have grown fond of you, and the little one of course. Charming boy, really." He mused, nodding his head to Damien who couldn't be all but happier.

"Then maybe we should."

*****

Alucard had come back inside the castle, a deer in his arms as blood was scattered across the shirt he wore, glistening on his face as well, dripping from his chin and splattered on the rest of his face. You were still sleeping soundly in the room, from what he could hear, which was pleasant for him. He could make you and the baby dinner without you seeing the mess he had made. A bit too bloody than he would have liked you to see. Waking up to a fabulous dinner hadn't been on your mind, though, Alucard had a habit of spoiling you.

You had grown even closer with Alucard- no, Adrien since then, who seemed to fall deeper in love with you as the day went by. He had told you stories of his childhood, his friends, his betrayal, and yet instead of being fearful in anyway- you only listened and empathized with him, assuring him that you would stay with him for as long as the universe allowed you to.

*****

"I never thought I'd understand how my father felt," He started one night, Damien sleeping in the new cradle Alucard himself had made in the room down the hall, his head on your chest while you played with his hair.

"But, once you came here, I didn't know what to think." You chuckled at his words, feeling him smile against your skin, his deep chuckle shaking you both as his arms tightened around you.

"You spoke with me, listened to me, cared for me when I needed it." He continued, enjoying your nails scratching his scalp, the safest feeling hes felt in quite a while.

"Thank you."

*****

Running down the hall with a child on his person wasn't what he thought he'd be doing months ago, chasing the woman of his affections with a smile on his face, hearing their laughter made his heart and head fill with light joy. Just as you turned the corner, he reached an arm out and wrapped it around your waist, Damiens body faltering slightly before he grabbed onto Alucard again.

"Gotcha." His face fell onto one shoulder, your son falling onto the other, moving your hands you placed it on your boys heads.

"I guess you did." You continued, before moving to take Damien, then laying your head on his chest.

"Well, I don't plan on letting go, so you're both trapped with me." He laughed lightly, pulling you with him to the hall, thinking now would be a good time to take you both on a walk outside.

"I think I'd be okay with that." You laughed, making your way out onto the back of the castle, something you noticed that had been happening more often than not, then again you'd rather not have Damien see the remnants of Taka and Sumi. Though they weren't lonely, with the newest editions of your old mistress and her own children who aided her in harming you, it seemed even in death Taka and Sumi had company on the land as well- everyone was happy! Alucard hummed at those words, his heart beating faster, he knew you meant it innocently, but he couldn't help it.

He wanted you here. You and Damien. You're both his to care for. To take care of him. To love. And to love him back.

You're both his. And he is yours.

For as long as you remained. Though, he knew of your mortality, he wished to change that soon, to keep you and your memories with him for the rest of eternity. Damien would surely follow, though he'd wait until he was a bit older, wishing to enjoy his childhood and help him grow into a fine young man. He'd of course have both of your permission, but he knew you'd follow his advice and Damien would do what his father said, so the only issue that came to his mind would have been the sunlight.

He could deal with that later though, find a witch or some magician that could cultivate a ring or two, to help you both walk with him in the sun. Perhaps a wedding ring? That would be a lovely gift, he thought, a wedding ring that would keep you with him. Maybe, he could commission a ring with the Belmont crest for Damien to wear, keep him safe from any other hunters who might have their suspicions.

"Adrien?" Your voice had pulled him from his thoughts, not noticing you and Damien at the river already, the young boy splashing around happily while you stayed near the edge- keeping him from getting in too deep.

"Yes?" He blinked, turning quickly to you, and striding over.

"Did you hear what I said?" Your voice was soft, scanning him.

"Ah. I'm sorry. I was just, enjoying the moment, thinking about how lucky I am. What was it again?" His arms tightened around your waist, placing his chin on your head, taking a deep breath.

"I said... I love you. I really do. You're the only one- who can make me feel this way. Safe. Happy. Loved. It's you." The warmest smile came to your face as you felt his heart beat quicken, your hands on his arms as you looked down with a distinct flush on your face, Damien coming up to hug both of your legs as well.

He couldn't believe it, it was real, you loved him. You said it. You meant it. You want to be his as much as he wants to be yours, you want to stay with him, you want to love him deeply. He felt so relieved, that his affections were returned, and he picked up Damien and kissing his head before his lips came down onto yours.

"And I love you too." You smiled against his lips, hearing his love for you back made you swoon, unknowing of the gentle manipulation of your heart that tugged you further into his world.

Something you gladly welcomed.

#castlevania x reader #castlevania imagine #Castlevania reader insert #castlevania x y/n #castlevania x you #reader insert #x reader #alucard x reader #alucard x you #alucard x y/n #adrien tepes x reader #alucard imagine #adrien fahrenheit tepes x reader #🐝

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kumoriyami-xiuzhen · 3 years

Text

Hakuoki Yuugiroku 3 drama: Please teach me, Yamazaki-san! English translation

Special thanks to @nollatooru for extracting text again since there’s no way this would have been translated anytime soon since the majority of drama translations that I’ve found as videos only are near the very bottom of my to-do list.

This is my translation of the 薄桜鬼遊戯録隊士達の大宴会店铺特典「教えてください山崎さん！」, the Yuugiroku 3 (too much of a hassle to look up the actual name) drama: Please teach me, Yamazaki-san!

Ended up doing a bit more research that I would have liked to translate this since the names of the positions in the Shinsengumi’s organization for spies didn’t translate well from Japanese into Chinese (huzzah for google translate and for biographies that list names in Chinese and Japanese so I was able to find the information I was looking for in English)... Also, i didn’t look up the gameplay for anything since I had to uninstall KW and EB for space when I was taking things off my damaged passport, not that it would have made much of a difference since I can’t recall a point when the “Watch” was actually voiced... so I might not really be consistent with a few things in this translation since I only did research during the latter half of this...?

oh well. i don’t know Japanese and don’t do the editing for my subtitle videos until I compare everything to the audio later so I can claim ignorance. i suppose that’s an odd benefit of not understanding Japanese hahaha.

Anyway, as always, my translation not be 100% accurate since I translate from Chinese. final edits will probably take a bit longer (in comparison to the other things i’m still sitting on) to do since im still debating about what im do with all the Watch-related words since I really don’t like it when the things I translate aren’t consistent....

PERSONAL RECOMMENDATION: I HIGHLY ADVISE AGAINST READING THIS AND WAITING FOR MY SUBTITLE VIDEO.

Hakuoki Shinkai Yuugiroku, Please teach me, Yamazaki-san! Drama CD

Translation by KumoriYami

Yamazaki: (I think that since there haven't been any large manhunt operations lately [reword later? tl can also mean "to hunt and arrest"], things have been quiet.)

(However, what is that guy doing/is that guy's purpose?)

The one out there, I'm not going to run.

So come out and tell me why you're spying on me.

~wind blows~

(Not planning on coming out...?)

-grips sword-

Then, I'll take the imitative to attack.

(movement in bushes)

Souma: Ah, please wait a moment!

Yamazaki: Oh. You are... Souma-kun?

(movement in bushes again) Saito: Sure enough, I was immediately found/discovered/I was detected immediately. As expected of Yamazaki.

Yamazaki: Based on just the breathing, I thought there was only one person, yet Saito-san was also still here. Exactly what are you doing?

Souma: Sorry! I didn't mean to do anything strange.

It's just that I wanted to observe Yamazaki-san work.

Yamazaki: Observe me work?

Although it's fine if you want to watch, but aren't you the Chief's page?

Saito: I recommended that he try this, But he was immediately found. Still it's better to ask the person himself directly.

Yamazaki: You two, what are you talking about?

Souma:...Um, Then, Yamazaki-san, please show me how to [/you] work! ----

Souma: Hakuoki Shinkai Yuugiroku, Store Bonus Drama CD, Please teach me, Yamazaki-san! ----

Yamazaki: In other words, you now understand the duties of a page, and still want to know what sort work the other warriors do, and want to try monitoring/surveillance/doing the Watch's work?

Is that how it is? Souma-kun.

Souma: It's just as you said. As the chief's page, I work hard every day, but I still don't know a lot about the Shinsengumi.

That's why I went and asked Saito-san [about this].

Saito: I know that Souma is working very hard. Though that will naturally be [more/become] obvious as time goes by/Though as time goes by, that will naturally be understood/Although this has been said for a while, this will naturally be understood. [check audio]

Yamazaki: But you don't want to wait for/until then, and want to be of use as quickly as possible?

Souma: Yes. Can you help me with this, even if it's [for] just a little bit?

Yamazaki: Hm.

Souma: Yamazaki-san.

Yamazaki: No, I was just reminiscing the past/thinking about the past.

I used to be as anxious as you are.

Alright, if I can, permit me to teach you.

Souma: Thank you very much!

Saito: Then can I also accompany/join you?

Yamazaki: Saito-san also wants to? That won't be a problem.

Saito: I also have experience following people while on patrol

I'm very interested in how the Watch [im pretty sure it's the Watch here and in the earlier instance. tho i can't say for certain since CN doesn't exactly do capitalization and ive never played the game in Chinese] fulfills its duties.

Please allow me to learn again. [check audio]

Yamazaki: In that case then, I'll ask you to please look after me.

----

Yamazaki: Although it normally referred to as the Watch,

the Watch is actually divided into two sections.

Souma: In terms of how it organized, sorry but please review it for me again.

Saito: The part of the organization for spies which acts by itself to gather external intelligence is called Shoshi shirabeyaku ken kansatsu*, and within that, those who are responsible for investigating/monitoring the conduct of [the/our?] members/the investigators whose duty is to supervise the conduct of/our members are known as the Kansatsugata**

* Shinsengumi's organizational post for investigating movements of the opponents and keeping the Shinsengumi members under control. (source: https://japanese-wiki-corpus.github.io/person/Kuwajiro%20OISHI.html)

** had to look this up on the Shinsengumi wiki.samurai-archives

Yamazaki, who holds both positions/is capable of accomplishing both duties, is at the core of the Kansatsugata.

Souma: Shoshi shirabeyaku and Kansatsugata...

After hearing this again, I really feel that Yamazaki-san is quite amazing.

Yamazaki: Uh, do-don't say that out loud. I'm not used to it.

Souma: But, monitoring/investigating/supervising the conduct of the other members...

Saito: It's to secretly investigate whether or not members are conducting themselves in a manner that is befitting as members of the the Shinsengumi, and whether or not they have done anything improper.

Souma: In other words/That is to say, that also includes my actions so far.

Yamazaki: At the moment, you have no problems [there are no problems with you?].

Souma: Is-Is that so...

Yamazaki: There are almost two hundred members. Among them, there will be people who do not abide by the regulations, and those who clearly show their dissatisfaction/obviously dissatisfied or are treasonous/or even rebellious.

Souma: I see. Indeed there are people who obviously show that.

Saito: It these people incite trouble within the team, it would be very troublesome.

That's why the Kansatsugata are needed to investigate people like this.

Yamazaki: Having said that, the three of us have been quite noisy so it would be helpful if we quickly correct that here. Ah. The two of you, over there.

Saito: Say who is there [more like "name" i guess? probably more "identify who is over there" ]

Souma: That is... Nagakura-san? There are several other people [He's with some other people/several others].

Yamazaki: This is a rare opportunity to train one of the basic skills for spying/[needed] as a spy. I'll give you a demonstration. Afterwards, you'll eavesdrop on their conversation without being discovered.

Souma: Yes, I'll do my best.

--------

Saito: Almost 15 minutes have passed. But it's really bold for you to have come up with this practical training, Yamazaki.

Yamazaki: For his first time attempt at doing this, Nagakura-san is suitable [to practise with]. As long as one isn't murderous [being bloodthirsty? think of something later], he'll basically ignore you.

Saito: Nn. If it was Souji, he would immediately draw his sword for a harsh/ruthless interrogation.

Yamazaki: No, Saito-san would do the same thing, and immediately get rid of your pursuer [not sure if this is in the "dispose of" sense though the tl i have can be translated that way lol].

Saito: Well, it doesn't feel good to be tested when I obviously haven't been disloyal.

Yamazaki: It's as you say, but this is my job.

Souma: AAAHHHHHH!!!!

Saito: Uh. [That’s] Souma. Why is he being hunted down [chased/pursued]?

Yamazaki: By whom/Who is it? Ah, Okita-san, at this time?

(frantic steps) Souma: Sorry! I didn't mean to do anything else!

This was just training for surveillance work!

(sword swung) Souma: AAAHHH!!

Okita-san, please forgive me!

Saito: An unexpected situation.

Yamazaki: He needs help to get away/escape from that situation, he isn't his opponent at all/he's no match for him.

Saito: I'll figure out a way to deal with Souji. You escape with Souma/You take Souma and run away. --------

Souma: Truly thank you for just now. Okita-san was already behind me before I realized it I really thought that I was going to die/I was dead.

Saito: Dying is a bit of an exaggeration.

But I'm certain he would have stabbed your neck with his sword and left you half-dead.

Yamazaki: I didn't expect Okita-san to be nearby, but there was way of knowing that you'd encounter him/but nothing can be done about meeting him [check audio].

Well then, change your mood for the next training [reword later]. The target is that room. Remain quiet from this point onward.

Souma: What's next?

Yamazaki: Take this letter and swap it with the letter in that room. But, in the next room, there is someone you must not be detected by.

Saito: Training for intelligence work? If this goes well, then it's possible that the other party won't even notice you.

Souma: That would be good, so it's just this letter? Then, I'll be right back.

Yamazaki: Ah, be very careful.

---------

Yamazaki: He entered the room without any problems.

Saito: Ah. So, who is the person in the next room?

Yamazaki: Well, it shouldn't matter since that person is asleep during the day.

( door slides open, then frantic steps)

Souma: Saito-san, Yamazaki-san! I'm sorry! I couldn't do it! As soon as I entered the room, I felt that someone was staring at me through the door of the next room! There was also this creepy laughter/ing!

Saito: Laughter? The eyes staring at you, were they red? [i swear this is going to become fanart one day lol. for both the spying and souma talking about what happened]

Souma: Yes! they didn't look like human eyes at all!

(door slides open.... slow creaking footsteps)

Saito: Does that mean that one over there was...

Yamazaki: Ah, damn it! He's awake!

Saito: Yamazaki, you go first! I'll deal with this!

Yamazaki: Sorry! I'll leave the General Secretary [so... i don't really like the English localization translation of Sanan's position being a "colonel" so i looked up what it said on wikipedia and used that] to you! Souma-kun, come here!

This training/Training ends here!

Souma: Eh, eeehhhhhhhh?!

Saito: I'm sorry that it was noisy while your rested [that this noise disturbed your rest?], this was as a result of... --------

Souma: What the hell that just now...

Yamazaki + Saito: It was just your imagination.

Souma: Eh. But, "General Secretary" was clearly said...

Yamazaki + Saito: You imagined hearing it [tl is more "it was an illusion" and one that is heard... maybe "you're hearing things"?. kinda gave up on thinking about that right now. ]

Souma: Is, is that so... uh. That being said...

Saito: What's wrong/What is it?

Souma: Although the Kansatsugata feels quite unremarkable, each individual/everyone posses outstanding abilities, and I've been made aware of that again. [However] I 'm incapable of doing this sort of work.

Yamazaki: Hm. It can be said that you're not talented at this.

Souma: Eh?

Yamazaki: In the first place, not everyone can do this.

All of us within the Kansatsugata are constantly working on improving our skills.

We're always fighting in the shadows for the Shinsengumi.

What you think of being outstanding abilities is the results of our hard work. [remarkable capabilities?]

Souma: Truly, Yamazaki-san is amazing. I understand why everyone trusts you!

Yamazaki: Th-That's why you shouldn't look at me like that. But for you, I think that you're better suited to doing honest work [tl can basically mean "honourable," "not devious" or "out in the open" in the straightforward sense] and not this secret monitoring work/surveillance in the shadows [reword later].

Saito: Indeed, compared to secretly taking covert actions in the shadows, you are better suited at working in the open, Souma.

Souma: I-is that so...

Thank you very much for this/that. If it's possible, I hope to still learn some things from you.

Yamazaki: There will be opportunities for that. Then, we'll end today's training here. Souma-kun, is there/do you have anything else you want to ask?

Souma: [Something] I want to ask.... ah. then, Yamazaki-san, may I ask you one last question?

Yamazaki: Ah, if I can answer, I won't hold back [will/do so].

Souma: What sort of technique is the "Tatami flip"?

Yamazaki: Ta... Where did you hear that name from?

Souma: Just now during this investigator training/spy training, Nagakura-san mentioned it/Nagakura-san mentioned it while doing the operative training. It is said that it is Yamazaki-san's most powerful technique.

Yamazaki: That guy said something unnecessary! No, Souma-kun, that's.... It's not something amazing like a secret technique..

Saito: Why are you being modest? That move is indeed capable of being referred to as/called a secret technique. If it's possible, I'll ask you to please teach me it. Perhaps I will be able to apply it to kenjutsu.

Yamazaki: Even Saito-san, what are you saying? [Even Saito-san is saying this? check audio]

Souma: Please, Yamazaki-san!

Saito: I'll be requesting the same of you, Yamazaki. [tl is more "i'm also requesting (you) to do so/asking"]

Yamazaki: Bo-Both of you, please raise your heads. I-I get it! I'll teach you.

Souma: Really?! Thank you very much!

Yamazaki: But, you can't tell anyone else about this.

Saito: Nn. Understood.

Yamazaki: Then, please get behind me. Aoyi***, Tatami flip!

This is the literal Mandarin pronunciation of the tl without tones. CN tl can mean “profound argumentation” (in Chinese), tho it's also used to refer to some of the highest level of martial skills in JP (so says a baidu search on the term).

The English google translate of that page puts this phrase as "Ogi," and after reading this page that mentions "ogi" (http://www.aikiweb.com/forums/archive/index.php/t-9948.html#:~:text=Yielding%20is%20called%20%22ju%22%20as,an%20open%20heart%20without%20ego.), so i will probably change this to either "Secret move" or "hidden technique" based on what it mentioned there

Souma: Uoh!

Yaamzaki: Ju-Just now, that was the Tatami flip.

Souma: Amazing, that was amazing, Yamazaki-san! How were you able to do that without any tools [check audio]? Please tell me how to do this!

Saito: This can be used indoors while fighting defensively/can be used as a defence when fighting indoors. It can also be used to hinder an enemy's movements.

Yamazaki: Yes. This requires focusing your strength into the centre of your palm, and within a single breath, smack/slap the edge of the tatami, and then lifting it up when the edge bounces.

Souma: So it's like that? Hoh.... tatami flip! Uh. Areh? It didn't bounce at all.

Yamazaki: Haha. It's not something you can master right away. It also took me a long time to do it. Concentrate/Focus a bit more strength into the palm of your hand.

Souma: Ha! Ah! Yah! It-It's not moving...

Saito: Practise makes perfect./Won't practise make perfect [check audio]? Alright, I will challenge this. Should the position of my hand be around here?

Yamazaki: Yes. [Though] It's better to have it moved a bit forward [moved up a bit]/ if the if the center of gravity is moved forward.

Saito: Understood. Then, I'll be going. Secret technique: Tatami flip!

Yamazaki: No way...

Souma: Uoh.

Saito: Nn. That happened naturally [reword later...? tl is is basically "letting nature take its course was achieved"] .

Souma: Sa-Saito-san, that was amazing! You actually succeeded in one go!

Saito: No, there's no guarantee that this will succeed every time. The accuracy and speed can be further improved upon.

Souma: Really, the Shinsengumi has assembled some amazing people. I can't fall behind and have to work even harder.

Saito: Ah , work hard. I am always willing to practise kenjutsu with you.

Yamazaki: Ah, but, to have it actually done it so easily, my confidence...

Saito: What is it, Yamazaki?

Yamazaki: No, I just feel that need to train a lot more. Let's improve together, Souma-kun.

Souma: Yes! Please look after me!

Souma Kazue, Kaji Yūki Saito Hajime, Toriumi Kōsuke Yamazaki Susumu, Suzuki Takayuki

-end-

sorry but this is the only souma thing i have scheduled for april.

also i wanted some Yamazaki content translated, but i unfortunately don’t remember if i ever found Yamazaki’s route from Yuugiroku 2... so I settled on translating what I hope is a certain complete chapter (as viewed via the extras menu) of Souji’s route with him in it... sorta. scheduled for july!

--------

image from suruga-ya

#hakuoki #hakuouki #hakuoki yuugiroku 3 #hakuoki drama cd #hakuoki drama translation #Saito Hajime #Yamazaki Susumu #souma kazue

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