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ugh-yoongi · 9 months

Note

a yoongi soft thought i have been having recently: streamer!yoongs with an also streamer reader, they both work independently but the fans know about their relationship and love it so much! i was thinking about them deciding to do a stream together where the reader does his makeup and they talk to the public, very cliche very soft lol

hope you like the idea, luv your writing ╰(*´︶`*)╯♡

omggg you have no idea how much i SQUEALED reading this message. thank u so much for sending it i am now overwhelmed with soft yoongi feels 😭

i have never actually watched a twitch stream??? so i hope i did this justice & you enjoy! <3

stream is starting

pairing: yoongi x reader (no pronouns used) genre: est. relationship, streamer au; fluff warnings: fluff overload. reader does yoongi's nails and makeup. they kiss a lot. idk what to say they're just very in love!! i don't think i said even ONE curse word in this that's how soft it is. unedited. rating: e for everyone wordcount: 1.6k listen to: carly rae jepsen - run away with me; jungkook - seven (nightfall mix)

It starts, as most things do with Yoongi, after a night out.

He’d gone out with Hoseok. Wanted to blow off some steam after a long week for both of them. You’d sent him off with a kiss, a text me if you need a ride that was met with an affectionate roll of his eyes, and finally a have fun, love you that he returned with a smile and a kiss to your forehead.

Now, it’s nearing two a.m., and you’re in bed with a facemask on, staring down at your phone.

Yoongi had sent you a picture. It’s blurry and unfocused, clearly taken on a whim, but those are undoubtedly Hoseok’s hands. You’d know those slender fingers anywhere, but it’s the nail art that tips you off. Each finger is painted black except for his pinkies, which are decorated with smiley face stickers, sealed with an extra-shiny clear coat. Beneath the photo, two texts from your boyfriend:

Is this hard to do They’re cute

You snort, typing out a quick reply.

No, it’s not hard Why, you want me to do your nails?

You expect him to say no. Not because of some toxic masculinity bullshit, he just does too much with his hands. Chip a nail playing guitar? The acetone would be out immediately. Smudge the polish? His pout would be overwhelming.

So you’re surprised, then, when he says yes; when he sends you a few pictures he plucked off of Pinterest, accompanied only with a half-dozen question marks.

Yeah, I can do that, you send him.

Even more surprising:

Maybe on stream? We haven’t done one together yet You can finally do my makeup too

You shouldn’t be surprised by the numbers, considering Yoongi has been hyping it up for weeks.

Kept posting teasers. Had a countdown timer on screen during his usual streams. Acted all coy and shy whenever his chat would ask him about it. Could barely swallow his smile when they demanded to know if you were finally making an appearance. Couldn’t hide the way his cheeks grew pink at all, and that tiny crumb was enough to send the internet into a frenzy.

So, no, you shouldn’t be surprised, but the view count on Yoongi’s screen seems too big to be real.

Yoongi is as shocked as you, but there’s pride simmering beneath the surface. Not once has he turned down an opportunity to show you off. Refuses to keep you hidden despite how private he insists on being otherwise. Doesn’t want you to feel like you’re a secret; wants everyone to know how much he adores you.

You’re certainly feeling adored now. “Does that say thirty thousand?”

“Sure does. Think you can perform under that kind of pressure?”

You snort. Pinch playfully at his side. Yoongi squeals, twists away from you, but he’s more serious when he comes back around. Reaches for you as he settles, hands on your hips, thumb brushing the warm skin beneath your sweatshirt. “Thanks for doing this with me,” he says, and you know Yoongi means it the same way you say I love you.

All you can do is smile, suddenly overwhelmed by how fond you are of him. How it feels like your heart grows three sizes every time he flashes you one of those gummy smiles of his own.

“Of course,” you say, because there’s only—“Five minutes. You ready?”

He pulls a face. Asks you to sit for a quick light test. Spends a few seconds fussing over it even though you think it looks fine. Makes sure all your supplies are organized and at the ready—you decided to let Yoongi’s stream decide all the colors and stickers, so there’s stuff everywhere, and you can see how stressed he is.

So you reach out, smooth over the furrow between his brows. “Relax, baby.”

He huffs. “I’m trying, it’s just—”

“You’ve done this a million times.”

“Yeah, by myself. Not with you. Not in front of… Jesus, there’s even more of them now.”

You roll your lips to hide the smile that’s creeping up. “C’mere,” you say, sliding your fingers through his belt loops. “Everything is going to be fine, okay? This is just for fun. Deep breaths.”

Yoongi listens. Closes his eyes, sucks in a breath. Holds it for a few seconds before he exhales, and it probably doesn’t do anything to dampen the buzz, but at least he looks glued back together. “I know.” Another inhale, another slow exhale. “I just want this to go well.”

“It will.”

He looks like he wants to argue. Push back on it. But Yoongi knows you just like you know him, and he trusts you implicitly. He wants to argue. Instead, he says, “Okay,” presses a soft kiss to your lips, and that’s the end of that.

“What color did they decide on?”

Admittedly, you might’ve gone overboard. Surely you didn’t need to bring over every eyeshadow palette you own, but you wanted options, and now those options are coming back to bite you in the rear. There are too many.

Yoongi huffs. “I don’t know. I can’t scroll through the chat because you made me put my hands in this ridiculous thing.”

“It’s a UV lamp. You don’t want your nails to chip, do you? After I just spent all that time and effort—”

“Okay, okay,” Yoongi relents, and a familiar blush creeps up his neck. Over his shoulder, you can see his chat explode with messages. “You see what I have to put up with?” he asks them.

“Yeah, it’s awful,” you agree, leaning in closer to the monitor. “Hi, guys. What color eye makeup should we do?” The chat erupts again. Messages come in faster than you can keep up with. “Wow, there are a lot of you. Of course I’m going to do eyeliner. Oh—I’m seeing a lot of requests for purple. That okay with you, babe?”

“Sure. Give the people what they want.”

With a smile, you pat his cheek with a gentle hand, cooing at him. “So accommodating. Isn’t he the best, chat?” Yoongi rolls his eyes, blush deepening. You think he’d hide behind his hands if they weren’t still drying. “Okay, nails are all done. Want to show them how they turned out?”

Like most things with Yoongi are, it’s easy.

He sits patiently while you prime his skin, commenting on how nice it is, and he makes small talk with his chat. Tells them how the two of you met, how disastrous your first date had been, how Yoongi thought he’d blown it for good. He’s told all of these stories before, but it still warms your heart to hear them again—to hear the way he speaks each word with such care, such affection.

“Show them how beautiful you look with your eye makeup done.”

He rolls his eyes, but does as you request anyway. Once again, the chat explodes, and the amount of emotes whirring by nearly makes you go crosseyed. COUPLE GOALS!!!! stands out amongst the chaos, and you know Yoongi has read it because another slow, gummy smile takes over his face.

You do his foundation next even though he doesn’t need any. Even though the chat demands he drop his skincare routine and he admits he doesn’t have one. “It is so unfair that you have this skin and can barely remember to moisturize.” You pretend to boo him. “God truly has favorites.”

“Yeah, you,” Yoongi says, and it’s so quick, so automatic, that it catches you off guard. Has you spraying the setting spray before you can tell him to close his eyes. “Aish, what was that—”

“Sorry!”

“I’m blind,” he wails. “You’ve blinded me!”

“I did not—”

But you’re up and off anyway, disappearing into the bathroom for a wet washcloth. You can hear Yoongi’s raspy laughter from the hall, know he’s not grievously injured and is just playing it up for laughs, and you don’t mind. Loving Yoongi means seeing all of his parts, and you know he’s got a darkness in him just like everyone else, that sometimes he finds it hard to escape it, so you want him to be this carefree and joyous always. Want to hear that laughter all the time.

You’re hovering in the doorway when he says, “Do you think this is what they meant when they said love is blind?”

And you’re… struck. You can feel how much Yoongi loves you in everything he does; can hear it in every word he says whenever he speaks about you. He handpicks each one, wraps it in the care it deserves. Not because they’re fragile, but because he wants to, and that kind of love feels a little overwhelming. Has you blinking back tears.

You’re not going to cry on stream, so you take a second to get yourself together before you walk back in the room. Say, “Are you done being dramatic yet?” because it’s easier to joke, and Yoongi shoots you a smile that says he knows.

“Of course,” he answers. “Please continue. The chat is patiently waiting to see the final product.”

You make a show of looking over his shoulder again, at pretending to read all the comments. You press a kiss to his temple just because you’re there. “Oh, they are, are they?”

One catches your eye: is anyone else painfully aware of how single they are rn.

#yoongi x reader #yoongi fanfic #yoongi fluff #yoongi fic #yoongi imagine #yoongi scenarios #yoongi x you #bts x reader #bts x you #bts imagines #bts scenarios #bts fluff #bts fanfiction #bts fanfic #bts fic #jewel writes

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heeliopheelia · 9 months

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can you do enha as love languages?

I'd love to!! I'm sorry, this is kinda long ://

HEESEUNG'S is definitely 100% physical touch:

- always HAS to have his hand around your waist or shoulders to pull you as closely to him as possible. i perceive him as a rather possessive man so the grip around you only INTENSIFIES whenever he spots a possible ✨threat✨

- holding hands is a must with this man, his thumb always strokes the skin on your palm. if you like to wear a ring, he'd love to run his fingers over the cool metal, with time doing it nearly absentmindedly, out of habit

- man's absolutely obsessed with your lips and kisses them whenever you're in a close enough proximity for him to tug you by your waist and smash your mouths together ^^

- but he loves kissing your cheeks and nose too – and don't even let me get started on your NECK!! oh boy, he lives for licking and sucking on the soft skin in there, marking you up (maybe or maybe not for everyone else to get the message that you're his and his only)

- let's just sum it up with that: whenever this man's eyes land on you – he's dropping everything just to pull you to his side

JAY'S are both gifts and words of affirmation:

- is hands down the best at comforting you when you're feeling down bcs he just can't stand to see his baby upset and he'd do anything to see your pretty smile again

- compliments you so much you'd think he would've ran out of ideas by now but nooo – every day it's a new one from him. and man is also just so fucking GOOD with his words he never ceases to make you feel butterflies in your stomach

- "there's no one else for me but you" "i love the way this shirt looks on you. i'd love to rip it off of you even more" "we're so good together, aren't we?" "everything i do is for you. you're my whole world"

- spoils the living shit out of you bcs he's this typa boyfriend to buy you everything he thinks you'd like or would've caught your eye if you went shopping with him

- it don't always have to be the big things. it can be one pretty flower he spots on his way back home and he's gonna buy it bcs he knows how happy you always get at such small simple gestures

- PRINCESS TREATMENT ALL THE WAY WITH THIS MAN 🗣️🗣️

JAKE – physical touch as well:

- my bro's addicted to hugs and always drags them out for as long as possible... loves to literally ENGULF you in his arms and squish you like a teddy bear

- always finds a way to somehow pull you to his lap, even if the two of you are just sitting by the table side by side and you're watching him eat whatever you've cooked for him earlier – bcs why would you sit on this hard chair when his thighs are so much more comfortable??

- can't go a day without your cuddles so pls make him happy and cling to him every chance that you get. feeling your warm body this close to his just makes his heart feel so full and mushy ajbsnzzsmx

- sleeping without having you in his arms is a literal HELL to him so even if you're not a sleep hugger right now – you're gonna turn into one after two months of dating sim jayun

- needs you to be his pretty little passenger princess bcs there's nothing that makes him happier than resting one of his hands on your thigh or intertwining it with yours to pull it on his lap. depends on his mood

SUNGHOON'S is quality time:

- as he's always busy, he absolutely treasures every tiniest amount of time that he gets to spend with you

- tries his best to never make you feel neglected so expect a date night at least once per week or two if he's super busy. has a list on his phone of all the places the both of you wanted to check out together, so the date ideas never run out

- he makes sure to spend his lunch breaks with you – whether to eat together or just simply take you for a walk

- also, takes three hundred pictures of you on each one of your dates so that he can scroll though them as much as he wants whenever he finds himself missing your pretty face

- thrives off of every moment spent with you, even if the two of you are just laying on the couch and scrolling through your phones. he cherishes your company the most in the world

- shamefully often ditches his scheduled meetings with friends or some work parties only to hang out with you instead

SUNOO – acts of service:

- always plugs your phone to the charger for the night bcs he knows you tend to forget about it as you drift off while scrolling through some dumb social media (an unhealthy habit of yours he discreetly tries to change)

- if you fall asleep after a party or some rough day at work/school and don't have the chance to properly take your make up off – dw cause he's gonna do it for you with gentle caresses of the make up wipes he's bought for you some time ago

- makes sure your plants are watered and healthy bcs he knows how sad you get whenever one of them ends up dying on you :(( (also is a big fan of buying you every single pretty plant he sees in a store so now you're happily stuck 14 of them decorating your bedroom)

- loves to do house chores together with you – he finds it so relaxing!! from washing the dishes alongside with you wiping them dry, all the way to simply dusting the rooms or folding the laundry together – he THRIVES off of every single one of these activities

JUNGWON'S are absolutely words of affirmation:

- since he's still young, physical contact might not be something he's super used to. speaking though – now that's something he's really good at

- "i'm not going anywhere" "loving you is never a task, darling" "i think you're just fine. you're perfect" = best boy at reassurance and boosting your confidence

- always hypes you tf up whenever you feel insecure or worse about yourself, so he makes it a personal mission for him to make all of these thoughts go away as he showers you with hundreds of compliments

- loves praising you and watching you becoming a flustered lovable mess 🫶

- after finding out that you love the sound of his voice and find his talking soothing – bro ain't gonna shut his mouth even for a second. he'd do just about anything to make you happy so if blabbering about every single stupid thing he saw on the internet today is one of these things, so be it 🙏

- he'd break his tongue if that meant you would feel loved by him

NIKI'S are subtle acts of service:

- he's very attentive to everything you do even if he might not appear as such type

- he has all of your order preferences memorized by heart or written down in his notes app. also, he knows you're not the biggest fan of ordering or talking to the waiters so he always makes sure to do it for you and places your order alongside with his by himself

- whenever you're on a walk and it's getting cold, he will FORCE his hat or gloves onto you, rather having himself freeze to death than seeing one shiver running down your body

- walks you to school every morning without a fail and always buys you coffee on the way

- has some or your spare clothes in his wardrobe so if you spontaneously decide to stay the night you don't have to worry about not having anything fresh to wear the next day

#–nonnies asks ♡#carly answers ✎#hope this makes up for the lack of drabbles this week 😋#enhypen imagines #enhypen x reader #enhypen #enhypen fluff #enhypen headcanons

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channelinglament · 11 months

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Is it okay if I send this idea. Imagine yandere hsr hearing you singing love songs. Imagine you singing a song like call me maybe. The characters would think you are asking them for their number.

AHAHAHHAH THIS IS GOLD✨️✨️

Since no one specified characters, I'll chose randomly (I actually started spinning the wheel in google lmao-)

- this is a reaction, not a drabble like I attempted ;w;

@2broschlininahotub

Trailblazer(Caelus and Stelle)

(You can think of one or both, I referred as they/them because I wanted you to pick the one you're comfortable with, or both if u want to. I mean, they're the same person-...but I can't help but think of them as twins lmaooo)

╱|、

(˚ˎ 。7

|、˜〵

じしˍ,)ノ

^ this is them.

"Did our Aeon just started singing??"

- they would just stand there and listen

- until they understand this is a romance

- Are you proposing your love for them?🥹

..You're asking for their number?

...💳💥💳💥💳💥💳💥 (this is Welt's credit card)

- You can get not only their number, but their(Welt's) money aswell!

- Also wdym by "You just met them"..?

- If they somehow manage to hack your phone (50/50 chance) then they'll 100% call you

...10000% call you if they manage actually..

They will not leave you alone afterwards tho..

You love them right?

Dan Heng

- ...

- * blushes and looks away *

- ૮ ˶ᵔ . ᵔ˶ ა

- Would definitely find a way to hack your phone and get your number. Though, probably, by this moment, you'll be at Herta's space station.

- would not question why did you start singing. Actually would ask you to sing more, he absolutely loves it.

..just don't sing it nearby others..

-2/10 would not recommend. Sing only to him. At least only romance songs (or around the trio)

March 7th

- Uwah!♡

- This is so cute!

- Ofcourse you can have her number!

- Would you like to take pictures with her?

- Maybe a date even?????

- *Furiously writes in her diary several pages about your "confession" for her*

/ᐢ⑅ᐢ\ ♡ ₊˚

꒰ ˶• ༝ •˶꒱ ♡‧₊˚ ♡

./づ~ :¨·.·¨: ₊˚

`·..·‘ ₊˚ ♡

Please sing it only to her.. just in general

She loves your voice, but

She can't chose, if she wants everyone to hear you, or if your voice should be only to her (or trio)

Silver Wolf

(Yes 2 gifs)

This two gifs is literally what she is doing after hearing what you just sang (while you're still singing-)

- Hacks your phone, takes your number and adds her.

- Even tho Herta froze her game accs...is willing to work with her and that robo-guy to bring you here.

- Doesn't wanna share with Herta and others..so would steal you afterwards

- Say hello to life with Kafka and Blade

- Until others find you..

Gepard

- *Blushing intensifies*

- He would turn into tomato

- His face would be redder than Riddle Rosehearts's hair

- Stutters

- Malfunctions

- But happy

- When you're here, would take you on a date. And give you his number almost immediately.

- Sadly cannot do anything before Herta, SW, Welt and others bring you here.

..He's so angry that he wanst the first one to see you, but at least you're here now

He understands that you need to communicate with others but..

Make sure to pay attention to him

___________________________________________

..Want me to make part 2?

..if yes then what characters? Or should I spin the wheel again?

https://spinthewheel.app/RJM6E2G5Di/link

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cellphonehippie · 1 year

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happy birthday miss carly rae! ♡

#carly rae jepsen #carly rae jepsen edit #crjedit

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rinsoap · 1 year

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˚ ༘ ♡⋆｡˚ ﾐ the big seijoh four's favourite artists!

✿²˖ ࣪ ➣ includes : oikawa tooru, iwaizumi hajime, matsukawa issei + hanamaki takahiro

note : sorry ive been inactive as hell w actual hcs or like. real works LMAOO i have been #depressed and #unmotivated LoL! anyways pls tell me u can see suna's influence on iwaizumi i hc that they r friends <33

oikawa tooru :

!!? KALI UCHIS STAN NEVER SPEAK 2 ME AGAIN. he LOVESSS her he is completely convinced isolation was specifically made to cater to him and his exact music taste delusional king fr!! and he gatekeeps her SO HARD like babes as much as i would like to be her top listener too, the 21,158,866 monthly listeners seem like they might be hard to beat 🤔

his favourite songs by kali uchis are :

tyrant - ft. jorgia smith on the isolation album.

i wish you roses (single).

loner on the por vida album.

!!? this artist is not a guilty pleasure no matter how many times he says he's sooo embarrassed he likes carly rae jepson. "omg stop don't tell people i like her that's humiliating omg stop i don't want people to know!!!!!!" he is a LIAR. he will publicly scream every single lyric to every single song she makes, IN FACT he will shamefully make tiktoks on public buses and shit, lip syncing to her songs on full volume (or at least he would if literally all of seijoh didn't tell him to shut the fuck up LMAO)

his favourite songs by carly rae jepson are :

call me maybe on the kiss album.

boy problems on the E•MO•TION album.

felt this way on the dedicated side b album.

!!? —✩⌗ HONORABLE SONG MENTIONS : good days by SZA. heart to heart by mac de marco. oh no! by marina and the diamonds. conceited by flo milli.

iwaizumi hajime :

!!? UGH ANOTHER AMAZING PERFECT TYLER THE CREATOR STAN. OOH I WANNA KISS ALL TYLER FANS ON THE HEAD I FREQUENTLY MAKE OUT W EVERY TYLER FAN EVER!! he's a very loyal listener, he knew him on vine bro like i said in pt 1, he introduced him to suna (while suna takes all the credit lol) he might even have a slight... fixation.. one might call it a.... crush.... but he will never admit it his ego is too big!!

his favourite songs by tyler the creator are :

A BOY IS A GUN on the IGOR album.

garden shed - ft. estelle on the flower boy album.

SWEET / I THOUGHT YOU WANTED TO DANCE - ft. brent faiyaz and fana hues on the CALL ME IF YOU GET LOST album.

!!? is it controversial to say he fucks w ice spice.. almost a little too much... he knows all the lyrics to munch which is def something he has in common with oikawa's music taste!!! like at this point they're like pavlov's dog, they are absolutely salivating every single time they hear "stop playin with em riot!"

his favourite songs by ice spice are :

bikini bottom (single).

princess diana on the like..? EP.

in ha mood (single).

!!?—✩⌗ HONORABLE SONG MENTIONS : she likes another boy by oscar lang. attention by new jeans. just a stranger by kali uchis and steve lacy. NASA by ariana grande.

matsukawa issei :

!!? unlike iwaizumi, he will admit his huge crush on brent faiyaz with his ENTIRE CHEST. brent faiyaz his love, his one and only (i am projecting!) <3 most of the content he consumes is brent faiyaz related tbh the algorithm knows him too well and before you ask the burning question on your mind, YES he did almost start a stan twitter in year one!!! makki will never let him live it down as if he didn't ACTUALLY start one for bruno mars..

his favourite songs by brent faiyaz are :

ADDICTIONS on the WASTELAND album.

what you heard (single) by sonder - technically still brent faiyaz.

talk 2 u on the sonder son album.

!!? he really should be ashamed he likes drake tbh. he physically could not compell himself to show anybody his spotify wrapped because almost all drake songs were in his top played. please never ever speak to him about the time he genuinely ugly cried to one dance. he will never elaborate and will probably go and sob to god's plan next.

his favourite songs by drake are :

way 2 sexy - ft. future and young thug on the certified lover boy album.

9 on the views album.

circo loco on the her loss album.

!!?—✩⌗ HONORABLE SONG MENTIONS : love is only a feeling by joey bada$$. small worlds by mac miller. awkward by SZA. finesse (remix) by bruno mars and cardi b.

hanamaki takahiro :

!!? ACTIVELY PUSHING THE MAKKI BRUNO MARS AGENDA!! fuck an evening with silk sonic he wants an evening with bruno 😭 all he is doing every day all day is praying bruno gets his heart broken again so he can drop another DELECTIBLE album!!!!! also him and iwa like to say that since makki is puerto rican and iwa is filipino, together they make one bruno mars <333 (this is a hc dont take it too srsly lol)

his favourite songs by bruno mars are :

that's what i like on the 24k magic album.

treasure on the unorthodox jukebox album.

after last night (with thunder cats & bootsy collins) on the an evening with silk sonic album.

!!? he is a dork and i am a dork soooo i'm gonna have to say he is a the living tombstone stan.... oikawa will go on full rants about how cringey 2020 was and how weird that video game animatronic type music is and he'll look over at makki and see the single tear roll down his face as he says he has no idea the music genre he's talking about 😭

his favourite songs by the living tombstone are :

my ordinary life (single).

drunk on the zero_one album.

jump up, super star! (single).

!!?—✩⌗ HONORABLE SONG MENTIONS : new person, same old mistakes by tame impala. your teeth in my neck by kali uchis. join us for a bite by JT music. ORANGE SODA by baby keem.

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tarotwithlove · 2 years

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pick a card: pick a scene from a film i love

.｡*♡ for singles; are you ready for love? what if ... you pursued the connection with your crush?

group 1: fallen angels, dir. wong kar wai / group 2: kamikaze girls, dir. tetsuya nakashima / group 3: syndromes and a century, dir. apichatpong weerasethakul

reminder that this is a general reading and messages found here may not apply to everyone. take what resonates, leave what doesn't, and don't force anything if it does not fit.

personal readings are open! feel free to dm for more information or to discuss a reading that is not listed there ♡

feedback, constructive criticism, requests and tips are appreciated! ppal cupidfemme

credit to theonlinemedium.com via @sororkaf for the "ready for love" spread used!

structure:

i will first be using the "ready for love" spread to answer the following six questions:

what you want in love? what you have learned from love? what is holding you back from love? readiness of your heart? readiness of your mind? readiness of your spirit?

this will then be followed by a reading on the connection between you and your crush.

feel free to read whichever section in your selected pile calls and applies to you and disregard that which does not. furthermore, if you are called to one group for your "ready for love" messages and another for messages on your connection you are more than welcome to mix-and-match at will ♡

1. FALLEN ANGELS, dir. wong kar wai

“as time progresses, you realize that a lot of the coolness and comedy held in the wordlessness of these characters is actually a façade to cover up just how desperately lonely everyone is. [...] the only way you know about their dreams, their aspirations, their full personhood is the disembodied thoughts they express through the narration. [...] no one is open enough for a real dialogue and connection, so instead they find other ways to force people to stay. maybe it’s sex, or violence, or a sales pitch. sometimes it works for an hour, for a night, or even a week, but it can’t last. even in the end, where the killer’s agent and he zhiwu find each other in silence and ride off into the sunset on a motorbike, the connection doesn’t feel permanent or guaranteed. a spark can only go so far. without real and open dialogue, the vice-grip will loosen and someone will leave. then we’re back in the beautifully lit dive bar, leaned against the jukebox as a mournful song plays, thinking of what could have been.” – with “fallen angels,” less words are more, oluwatayo adewole

channeled songs: spider by hoshi (“i want to stay here with you here, tangled up and trapped together”) · elevator (127f) by nct 127 (“let's just keep it simple”) · in the aeroplane over the sea by neutral milk hotel (“but for now we are young, let us lay in the sun, and count every beautiful thing we can see”) · call me maybe by carly rae jepsen (“before you came into my life, i missed you so bad”)

cards pulled: ace of wands, the devil, three of swords (rx), four of swords (rx), ace of swords (rx), the chariot (rx) and the ten of swords ; five of cups (rx), page of swords, king of cups (rx)

ARE YOU READY FOR LOVE?

hey there, pile one ♡ to begin this reading, i am seeing that what you want from love is to be understood on both an intelligence and sensual level, where you might have previously only been seen through the sensual lens; desired for your body and not for who you are in your entirety. you want to feel as if you have the full attention of your partner with regards to your wants and needs. you want to feel desired and attractive to your partner even after a long time of being together. you may be wondering if your standards for love are too high and if you should be lowering them in case they leave you “single for life”.

what you want from love and what you have received from love are at odds. the relationships you have had in the past may have been driven by the physical; hook-ups where the partners did not communicate with each other what they really want leading to confusion and heartbreak, sometimes this could have been your partner who did not communicate that all they wanted was a purely physical relationship while at other times it could have been you. there is a history of codependency in your previous relationships that often saw you losing yourself in your partner, and losing your identity in what your partner wishes for it to be. yes, your previous relationships have caused you a lot of pain, but they have also taught you so much about yourself, about the truths of your desires and standing independently in who you are, as well as about being a better communicator. or have at least pushed you towards doing the difficult work of understanding yourself in all these ways.

while you have this idea of what you want in love and your past experiences have taught you so much, there is still a lot that is holding you back from love. past heartbreak most of all. you are so hung up on the pain of your past relationships and connections that it is causing you not to progress on your journey towards love. there is a call for you to heal, and this can only be done if you confront your wounds instead of ignoring them and pretending it's all okay when it is not. you may not be able to forgive those who have hurt you, and you honestly do not have to, but if you do not address the pain they have caused you in some way it will only make the pain worse, will only hurt you more, and will hold you back from love.

now to delve into the readiness of your heart, mind, and spirit. i see in the four of wands reversed that your heart is ready or is very near to being ready. you have gone through a lot of change and have had to face a lot of darkness, but you are also fighting for your own healing. you are in a way, after all these challenges, becoming yourself. as your heart strengthens, you may feel as if you are strong enough to handle everyone else's burdens on top of your own but do not go down this route of being so caught up in the opinions of others, especially of any new romantic interests, that you risk your sense of self and identity. your heart wants you to know that while you may be looking for love, you may be apprehensive because of past hurt, but both the challenges and the work you are doing in healing has made it strong enough to handle any heartbreak or challenges that may arise in the future. and challenge is inevitable. hiding from it does not serve you.

for the readiness of your mind, i started hearing “let's just keep it simple” (from elevator (127f) by nct 127) when i got to this point, so what i am seeing is that your mind and heart are quite at odds. while your heart is prepared for love your mind wants to take it slow and thinks it would be best to shy away from commitment for the time being. your love life may be lacking in fun, either always too serious or fun for the other party and not necessarily for you, and right now that's what your mind is yearning for, or what your mind believes to be the safest route. it may also be, in line with this, that you are overthinking love and, thus, are scared of committment. your past relationships and connections have caused so much pain and damage that your mind is not strong enough to potentially deal with that again. so keep it simple, keep it cute, buy me a drink and leave it at that, is basically what your mind wants at this moment. it is important to listen to your mind, if you don't you may risk ending up in a far worse state then when you started your healing journey. meditate, rest, nourish your mind and soul and truly introspect on the residual mental wounds from past relationships and connections by which you continue to be plagued.

as for the readiness of your spirit, here i pulled the chariot reversed and the ten of swords (the ten of swords slipped into my spread without me realising until the end), which is a good sign. it's interesting to me that your reading is associated with fallen angels when, like the movie, it is a tale of two different stories; half of you ready for love and half of you only wanting to pull back and not embrace it yet. with the chariot reversed, your spirit acknowledges these challenges and blockages that are keeping you from truly moving forward, however this is what it is ready for. moving forward. your spirit recognises the work you still need to do put but it is ready for the challenges that may, and will, arise, as we see in the ten of swords. your spirit asks you not to shy away from new opportunities out of fear. do the healing work necessary and trust that your spirit (and heart and mind) will be rested and strong enough. trust that you are strong enough and that you are fully capable of facing these risks for the chance at a high reward.

WHAT IF ... YOU PURSUED THE CONNECTION WITH YOUR CRUSH?

this might be difficult to hear, but you must know that what spirit asks of you is to move on from this connection. yes, there is love in your future, but it is not here in this connection and in order to find it you need to move on. this crush may not be going anywhere, and from what i am seeing, you do not want it to. it will hurt to let go of this crush, as it always hurts to let go of something you have poured your heart into, but as important as it is to let go it it as important to actually feel your pain so that you may re-enter the dating pool in due time.

now to go into depth about why spirit urges you to not pursue anything more with your crush, at least not in a romantic sense. the page of swords and king of cups reversed suggest a warning. this person may be important to you as a friend, or as an “activator” of sorts to give you an opportunity to prove to yourself that the work you have put into healing has been sufficient. in a relationship, however, i do not see you two complementing each other, rather i see you as a couple that is argumentative and conflicting in various areas of life and relationships. this crush is highly emotionally immature as a lover where you are more mature and stable, and are doing the work into growing. as a result of this, you may be in a mindset and time of your life where you may be wanting to start a family, but this person is just not ready for that. at least–and i'm sorry,–but not ready to start this family with you. if this person is capable of maturing, they are not ready to do it for you or for your possible relationship. now, if this is person is married and making you all these promises, know that that is all this is: empty promises made to keep you within a reachable distance without any intent to actually step up and do the mature thing. a relationship with this person may not at all be happy. spider by hoshi was in my head from the moment i started your reading and i realise now that this is where it becomes most relevant. you may be intoxicated by this person's dark energy; excited by the toxicity and danger of the situation, and not realising or refusing to realise how much it could hurt you.

2. KAMIKAZE GIRLS, dir. tetsuya nakashima

“like enid and rebecca in "ghost world," these two lonely girls travel through a world of their own creation, manufactured from the detritus of pop culture and pronounced alienation. [...] ichiko punctures momoko's isolation, taking a pin to the bubble the other girl calls self, which may be a metaphor about japan (or not). what the film does say, with infectious exuberance, is that in a world in which shopping is a cartesian truism -- in the immortal words of barbara kruger, "i shop therefore i am" -- it's so much nicer to go with a friend.” – two girls with one goal: they just want to have fun, manohla dargis

channeled songs: round&round by nct u (“everything is useless, i revolve around you, without being able to move closer”) · applause by lady gaga (“give me that thing that I love (i'll turn the lights out)”) · overcome by sparky · talk by hozier (“imagine being loved by me!”)

cards pulled: the magician (rx), the star (rx), eight of pentacles, six of pentacles, five of wands, four of cups (rx) ; two of pentacles, queen of pentacles, the lovers

ARE YOU READY FOR LOVE?

hey there, group 2 ♡ to begin your reading i see a certain lack of confidence that stops you from having relationships. what you want from love is to feel known by your partner; to be loved even for those things of which you are insecure as well as to love someone through those things of which they are insecure. especially those insecurities that they have not shared with others. in love, you desire rawness, trust, equal give and take.

your past experiences with love, however, have caused you to lose faith in love and the universe's promise to bring love to you. you wonder why you can't be as happy as others are, you wonder when it's going to be your turn... your faith has been tested by your past romantic experiences, and current romantic situation, but if you must take any lesson from this it is that the Divine and spirit are there for you. if you must learn anything from your past experiences it is to trust in the universe as it prepares you for the gentle love you deserve, and as it shapes your self-confidence and feelings of worth to be ready for a well-rounded relationship. do not fall into cynicism, or into thinking that all love has for you is pain because this is absolutely not the case.

as for what is holding you back from love, besides the lack of self-confidence i see that you are focusing too much on education or work. and while this is important, of course, you are throwing too much of yourself and your time into these endeavour and not paying attention to the opportunities at love that are coming your way or being offered to you. or, you are throwing yourself into work and school as a distraction. because if you can just focus on this next presentation this assignment this meeting you don't have to focus on addressing and healing your relationship-related pain.

now to get into the readiness of your heart, mind, and spirit. for this part we have the six of pentacles, five of wands and the four of cups (reversed).

your heart wants so badly to share love and good fortune with another. it has taken then pain that past relationships and connections have caused it and has become only even more capable of loving.

your mind and spirit are at odds with this, however, with neither having fully healed from these past experiences. your mind is still sensitive to heartbreak and in any upcoming relationship you may be prone to overthinking, to looking out for every sign that means they will leave you or will otherwise hurt you. you heart mind desires yes–something new, someone who will will challenge it and you–but it is so unsure of what lies ahead it does not feel ready to pursue anything yet. similarly, your spirit is wounded. it is as reluctant to open up to someone new as your mind. both your mind and spirit require nurturing and for you to go through a period of withdraw in order to help them heal. right now, even if you have someone in mind, it may be best not to pursue anything romantically. surround yourself with those you love, meditate and journal, and treat yourself with love as you would a partner. if you are feeling discontent and unhappy with the state of your love life at the moment, allow yourself to truly feel those emotions instead of burying your feelings in distractions.

remember that it is a very limited amount of healing that we can do by ourselves; no healing at all if you choose to distract and ignore and pretend. it is a painful journey, but it is needed. like our main characters in kamikaze girls, what you may need now, far more than the relationship you're seeking, is to open yourself up to friendship and the love found within friendship. it could be friendship that you are not allowing yourself from experiencing by throwing yourself so much into school or work, but there is someone offering it out to you. an olive branch you just need to accept, even if it is awkward at first.

WHAT IF ... YOU PURSUED THE CONNECTION WITH YOUR CRUSH?

pulling these cards genuinely made me so happy... this connection, if pursued, would be such a prosperous one. even when obstacles arise, as they do in all relationships, you will find a way to work through it together. there is balance here. yet, in the beginning things with this connection may be far more tricky. you will be in a situation where you have to make a decision; it might be this crush is in your workplace or is a close friend and you have to figure out what would be best for both parties moving forward in this relationship.

in fact as we have both the two of pentacles and the lovers, you may often need to make difficult decisions, address priorities and, if needed, re-prioritise. such as in a situation where you may find yourself questioning if you are ready to juggle that which a relationship asks of you with what your job or school also asks of you, or, in the relationship where you may have to choose between staying in one country with your partner or moving away (i'm seeing to another country, in particular) in order to pursue academic or professional goals.

however, as i already mentioned, this relationship will be harmonious. as a partner your crush is stable and level-headed, thus creating an equally as stable relationship environment. they will meet your standards–shockingly, to you, if your standards are particularly high–and will not only have money but will want to share their wealth with you and look after you. you two form a balanced union in which you empower each other, encourage each other and boost each other's confidence. there is a long-term quality to this relationship and, if committed to, may result in marriage. of course if marriage is not for you or not accessible to you i definitely see some kind of life commitment or life commitment ceremony taking place.

3. SYNDROMES AND A CENTURY, dir. apichatpong weerasethakul

“what is it all about? like weerasethakul's previous features - tropical malady (2004) and blissfully yours (2001) - it takes as its starting point a tale of tangled human relationships, in this case the faltering love life of a demure young female doctor at a remote, upcountry thai hospital. then it takes off into alternative worlds, alternative realities, unrealities, surrealities. the same scenes are played again, in different settings, with different people. the buddhist idea of reincarnation is being sported with. or is the film simply questioning the 19th-century train-tracks of traditional narrative?” – syndromes and a century | film review, peter bradshaw

channeled songs: replay (pm 01:27) by nct 127 (“i just wanna be loved”) · make me cry by pip millet (“im numb, lonely, thought i was the only one, it's hard to find the right words, knowing that they'll all hurt, in sync with the sunset, down and I am out for the night, surrounded by the darkness, trying to find the light”) · at seventeen by janis ian (“i learned the truth at seventeen, that love was meant for beauty queens”) · bungee by nct dream (“come here, babe, there's nothing to fear”)

cards pulled: eight of pentacles (rx), six of wands (rx), ace of wands (rx), the magician, the chariot (rx), four of pentacles ; temperance, queen of pentacles, ace of pentacles

ARE YOU READY FOR LOVE?

hey there, group 3 ♡ in love i see that you want something careful, something thoughtful. you want a relationship where you hold each other accountable and work together to love each other as the other needs. you want a relationship where no one wants for the love they desire, and where you can feel safe, protected and assured.

as for what you have learned from love, the six of wands (reversed) tells me what you have learned most of all is doubt and lack of confidence. you see the love and attention your peers and friends receive and you have come to doubt your own worth and attractiveness. you feel unloved and neglected, and as if you'll never have a real, meaningful love. as a result of this inattention your confidence has been greatly shaken. this is what love has taught you: you are unworthy of it. but you are not. i cannot emphasize enough how worthy of love you are.

you are being held back from love by your inability to define what you really want from it. it is an inability which leads you to direct your energy into too many places and which drains your energy, such as having a lot of “crushes” that go nowhere, going on dates that don't fulfil you, going on dating apps even when they exhaust you. you don't have a proper vision of love, which, for a lot of you, i see can be chalked down to simple lack of experience in relationships and love.

now to look at your readiness of your heart, mind and spirit. for your heart we have the magician, which is a clear message that your heart is ready for excitement, love, and experimentation with love. you are able to create opportunities, especially outside of your comfort zone, to meet someone with whom you'll be in a relationship, even if fleeting. as well as this, you are in an ample position to manifest the love you desire. this is what your heart wants, and it is okay to embrace that if it feels right for you.

as for your mind... you are so intent on reaching the goal of love you have in mind that your mind spurs you to act too forcefully. your mind must come to terms that it, and you, will not always have control in life. it is ready for life, yes, but it must recognise that love is in the hands of the divine.

while for your spirit, again i feel a lot of inexperience in this group, as well as a lot of pain. this pain can come either from past relationships or from never being considered for romantic relationships. your inexperience and pain is deep-set into your spirit and, as a result, entering a relationship will lead to a sense of possession, bordering on the unhealthy if you are not careful. your spirit is greedy for love and reassurance. it won't be ready unless you properly resolve the trauma of your past and let it go.

WHAT IF ... YOU PURSUED THE CONNECTION WITH YOUR CRUSH?

after the heartache and neglect you have been put through it will ease your heart to hear that a love worthy of you awaits.

temperance, the queen of pentacles and the ace of pentacles showing up signifies a prosperous relationship. in temperance we see that this love will be patient and understanding, even if it does come at the hands of a lot of effort. is that anything to worry about though, for isn't effort one of the greatest signs of love? one of the greatest signs of care? there is compassion in this relationship, more on the part of your partner as you will be faced with having to work on your own negative traits. are you selfish when situations call for selflessness? quick-to-anger when the situation calls for your understanding? rude when you should be patient, clingy when you should leave your partner with room to breathe? this relationship will provide you with a safe space within which to address and work on all of this.

in the queen and ace of pentacles we see that this relationship will take “hard work”, but not in the miserable sense, rather in the sense that these two people are so commited to making something beautiful last for a long time.

in this relationship, you will prosper as individuals and as a couple; flourishing in how much you want to see each other live their best lives possible.

i keep getting drawn to making comparisons between how a farmer tends to his farm or a gardener tends to his plants or a florist tends to his flowers. so this person may be in one of those professions or may be perfectly capable of looking after the gentle and fragile which–and no shame in this at all–you currently are. this person might have a very rough exterior which is scaring you away from making any move towards them, but they are honestly such a kind, gentle soul.

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