#caretaker!jason
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Royjay baby fever 👀 perhaps
(The olde plap plap get pregnant gyahaha)
Since this blog is what it is, Dickjay + Roy baby fever, sorry! 👀 Because ahhhahaha imagine if you will:
"So when are you going to let Dick knock you up?"
By no means are Roy and he the sort to pussyfoot around each other, but damn. Jason's jaw drops. From the kitchen, he can hear how Dick fumbles some dishes - a loud crash followed by an unnatural silence.
That Dick overheard the comment is mortifying. That he’s clearly listening for Jason’s response only makes matters worse.
Roy's question feels more accusatory than inquiring. It’s so shocking that, for a moment, Jason considers it before remembering he’s a man; there's nothing to fucking think about. Even if he could get knocked up, it’s not like Dick could—
Not the point. Jason scowls and stretches his leg across the couch, driving his heel into Roy’s thigh for being so crass.
‘As soon as you leave,’ is what Jason ought to say. It’s exactly the sort of sarcastic quip he’d usually banter with, but he's acutely aware of Dick's eavesdropping and while Dick wouldn't care, the thought of being so brazen makes Jason blush. Instead he grumbles, "We already have Damian."
Ugh, Jason can feel how Dick clutches his chest in endearment. The sentimental sap.
"Yeah, but don't you miss when he was a baby?" Roy asks around a nostalgic sigh and oh—this is clearly about Lian, which makes Jason snicker. That makes more sense. Roy probably saw some old photos or was accosted by the kid about wanting siblings or some such.
"He's arguably still a baby." Jason snarks, but can't bite back a smile at the memories of before and he finds himself sharing them eagerly—small hands that always reached for him, patting his cheeks and pulling his ears; wide, green eyes staring up at him with wonder instead of the sullen broodiness of an edgy punkass brat; the way Damian taught himself to walk just to toddle after him all the time and—
There's a thump from behind him and Jason startles, looking over his shoulder. He finds Dick half-sprawled across the floor, exposed from where he'd been hiding behind the corner. For a long moment, they stare at each other with matching flushes across their cheeks and Jason realizes that oh. He'd never told Dick about this part of Jason's sorted past, had he?
It's a problem to address at another time though, because Jason can feel the trouble Roy is stirring up behind him as the man comes to the conclusion that Dick is their weak link in all things domestic.
Jason turns on him with a warning, "Don't you dare—"
And Roy laughs as, at the same time he calls, "What's it gonna take for you to knock this man up, Grayson? He needs a baby!” And the crux of the matter, like the good father he is: “Lian would be so happy, come on!"
#dickjay#jaydick#dick being taken out at the knees whenever caretaker!jason makes even the slightest appearance will never not send me#caretaker!jason#he remembers baby Dami fondly //u///
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the infinitely funnier version of enemies to caretaker with Jason and Tim (bc the ooc aged down incompetent Tim and weirdly protective Jason are overdone) is Tim after he gets adopted by Bruce deciding that he can’t have a loser brother that shoots people and refuses to go to therapy
so Tim is like “yeah, I can fix him” and batfam is like “NO TIM YOU CANT, HES A PSYCHOPATH WITH ANGER ISSUES” because at that point it’s been two years(??) and there’s been no to little improvement when it comes to Jason’s behavior
Tim being the stubborn bastard he is doesn’t listen though and in the following weeks (months??) just starts slowly forcing Jason to self reflect and take care of himself. I like to think Tim is threatening Jason with non-lethal violence and/or inconveniencing Jason to an unholy degree (one of said threats is Tim saying he’ll pull up to Jason’s safe house in a Red Hood costume and start shooting him)
in the end you just have a Jason who looks like his soul has left his body but behaving and a smug looking Tim who once again has proved he is right
#tim drake#jason todd#batfam#enemies to caretaker#dc#dcu#dc comics#red robin#red hood#robin#dc robin#my brain
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Prompt:
Jason, upon coming back to Gotham and seeing how neglected Tim is, breaks into Drake manor and drags Tim by the collar over to Wayne manor and kicks down the door, yelling for Bruce.
“IT’S THE GHOST OF CHRISTMAS PAST, BITCH! AND IT WANTS WORDS WITH YOU!”
#prompts#actually that would be fun to write for actual Christmas#jason todd#batfamily#dick grayson#batfam#bruce wayne#robin#red hood#Tim drake#enemy to caretaker#batbros#crack treated seriously
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Prompt 293
Jason takes a deep breath. He takes a deep breath, in for ten seconds, out for eight, and just takes a minute before looking again. Nope, there’s still the strange quartet of orbs in the box of what should be stolen weapons (What, the government had enough, honestly) that gave his workers the heebie-jeebies.
Which is not the vibe he gets from them. In fact, he’s actually kind of concerned with how much he has to beat the Pit back with how quickly it lurches to latch onto the… Well they’re not gems, and he’s a little wary about touching them at first, but the Pit does seem to settle when he does.
Alright, he can deal with this. It’s not like he has several heads in a duffel bag that needs to be delivered or a tiny assassin child back in his safehouse (Seriously Talia, why was he the preferred babysitter?) or an entire gang in Crime Alley to deal with. It’ll be fine.
…
He would like to curse out his past self, because there’s now four babies in his safehouse that appeared to have fucking hatched from the orbs. Goddamnit.
#DCxDP#DPxDC#Prompts#Dad Hood#Let Jason & Damian be Brothers#De aged Dani#De aged Danny#De aged Vlad#De aged Dan#Jason just wants to do his crimelording business & finish online college dangit#He doesn’t need all these kids around#No no you can’t have them they’re his kids#Vlad absolutely loves that their caretaker is a crimelord#Jordan: Hah look I'm not the only murderously violent one in this family now#Ellie & Danny: Well at least he's not a cop so#Jason is honestly expecting Damian to be pissed but Damian? Very pleased#OLDER siblings? Meh that’s competition & people to prove oneself against#But Younger siblings & nephews & nieces? Those are Tiny People who Look Up to You#The perfect minions it’s all coming together!#”Dami please that’s not how things work… besides you’re going to go to your dad’s soon-”#Damian when he’s at the Manor: I am going to visit Akhi#”Oh Tim or Dick?”#”What are you talking about- Mother sent Akhi here months ago and I wish to visit him and my niblings-”#Cue Bat Freakout & Misunderstandings#Space core Danny#Plasma core Vlad#Moon core Ellie#Sun core Dan#Star Core Jason#Shadow Core Damian
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Comic-style art I made inspired by 'A Meditation On Railroading' by @eggmacguffin - from when Jason finds Tim on the train 💖
#my art#red hood#jason todd#robin#tim drake#batfam fic#a really good fic!!! 🥺💖💖💖#the author writes the emotional turmoil so well#and there's a happy ending!#enemy to caretaker#batman fanfiction#batfamily#digital art#practice#dc fanart
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Reverse Robins AU is a fun concept, but I need more of that Jason POV angst.
If Tim and Jason are swapping roles (i.e. Tim dies and Jason is the third Robin), I need that focus on Jason's early Robin years.
Bruce, who's a grieving brutal man, would scare Jason. The violence, the coldness, and (if it's your flavor) the alcoholism. Bruce finds this child and, unlike for canon Jason, doesn't show him love and care.
So why does Jason stick around? Why would Jason put up with this behavior?
Bruce reminds Jason of a gnarly combination of Willis and Catherine.
The violence, the yelling, and the fear of a father figure are reminiscent of Willis. The lack of self-care, depressive spirals, and dissociative states are a messed up way Jason can see some of his mom again. Jason gets glimpses of his parents, but only in the worst sides of Bruce.
I want to see Jason tucking in Bruce and humming songs that would comfort his mom. Similar to when Catherine would forget or be unable to prepare food, Jason would ensure Bruce ate. He would chat lightly for hours to bring Bruce back from staring at Tim's case.
If Bruce is an alcoholic in this fic, Jason would be rubbing Bruce's back as he vomits. He would watch as Bruce poured another glass knowing he can't stop him.
When Bruce goes on a rampage, when he's screaming and hollering and throwing things, Jason would be hiding in his closet. Damian probably told Jason to call him when it gets like that (Damian can get Jason out of there if he can't stop it), but why would he? It's not like anyone was there for him before. It's not like calling for help led to him actually getting the assistance he needed. Instead, it usually led to the situation becoming worse.
So, despite the parentification (that's all that Jason's known), the kid stays. Bruce needs him after all. He eventually pulls Bruce away from the ledge. He finally gets a dad that doesn't cause his hands to tremble. Damian comes around more often and teaches Jason how to protect himself. Finally, the kid is Robin and able to help people (like how he saved Bruce).
Then Tim comes back from the dead.
#dc comics#dc universe#jason todd#tim drake#reverse robins#batfam fic#jason todd angst#the parentification of children#tw alcohol#tw parental abuse#jason deserves better#how did canon tim deal with bruce#au jason can't escape his role as his parents' caretaker
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underrated trope: Nightwing is taken hostage and Red Hood saves him, but it’s before Jason’s identity reveal - so Dick is confused and scared
#enemy to caretaker#whump#hostage scenario#identity reveal#dick and jason#nightwing#red hood#jason todd#dick grayson#batman#dc
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Tim Brings Jason Back Into The Family au where everything’s the same but instead of being motivated by love and brotherhood or “this would make Dick and Bruce happier” he’s just following the keep your enemies closer policy
#Timothy Male Manipulator Drake#leo says shit#batfam#jason todd#tim drake#tim: adopting jason will help me keep an eye on him and he won't be able to commit crimes if he's busy taking care of uwu baby timmy drake#tim: *three months later realizing he loves his brother and quite likes having a caretaker* well that backfired
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i understand this is a matter of preference but the continuous exaggeration of the age gap between jay and the other batkids esp in order to make him assume a role of a caretaker is a bit distasteful to me for reasons hard to articulate. the age gap between him and tim is 2 years at most. stephanie is just a year younger. cass is the same age if not slightly older. between him and dick, in the original post-crisis timeline, there is 6 years at least.
one reason for which altering these age gaps bothers me is def that jason's youth (and even his stunted by trauma emotional growth) is an important factor in my reading of him. he is 18 in utrh; where i come from, he wouldn't even graduate high school yet (unless he skipped grades of course). he missed so many years of his childhood but he is also still young.
which leads me to why i reckon making a case of him becoming a caretaker as a fixt-it specifically bothers me a lot. what is truly hopeful about making a teenager/young adult so deprived of parental care that it drives him- very mentally unwell, assume that role? where does the idea that dropping a kid or another teenager or someone in his position in general will make him "heal"? he already was a caretaker in his life. before bruce took him in he was even a parentified child for a while.
i'm not saying that jason wouldn't care or would be incompetent at being a guardian. i'm not even saying that it wouldn't help him reconnect with civilian life or make him rediscover his inherent sensitivity. but i do think treating it as an actual solution to his problems is a wild fucking idea and 99% of the time it actually leads to completely ignoring his storyline and the character psychology. a plotline like that is fucking sad to me before it is anything else tbh
#all the power to teenage moms/caretakers.#i don't think it's a desirable position for jason to be in#which can be interesting to explore i'm not saying not.#but i draw the line at it having to do with tim and steph#also it's so offensive to steph.#at least the ones with damian actually make sense and do show it as a problem and not fun and games#tbd
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not gonna lie jayroy can be kinda fun when you don’t have a bitch in your ear complaining about it
#I read a meta that described them as ‘Roy is a former addict and Jason is a classically trained caretaker/enabler they would be#intrinsically drawn to each other for reasons that are not entirely healthy’ and I was like. Woag. Let’s get into it#‘Classically trained caretaker/enabler’ is thee perfect way to describe Catherine’s effect on Jason#I’m incorporating that into my vocabulary immediately#Jason Todd#Jayroy
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For the second time that night, he wakes up with the back of his neck prickling. He opens his eyes, expecting to see the kid staring into his soul and beyond. Only for his gaze to land on empty air. A part of him withers imperceptibly.
He turns. And tries to resume sleep.
To no avail
He tries again, slowing down his breathing to quell the unease. Something in the air shifts imperceptibly. And he opens his eyes. What if the kid was hurt. He didn't check.
He was catastrophizing. The kid didn't look in the least, uncomfortable.
He turns again. The kid still isn't there. Why was expecting him to be?
The kid had a high pain tolerance. And a difficulty communicating his emotions and physical state, even through scent. He gets up to check. For Wintergreen's sake, of course.
Wintergreen would kill him if he let the kid get hurt. Slowly and painfully.
He gets up to check on the kid.
And almost steps on him.
"Jesus Christ"
Jason's snoring at his feet. Radiating contentedness despite the fact that he must be freezing on the cold, hard floor. He kneels next to the kid, to wake him up and get him to bed.
The kid's probably used to sleeping on cold, hard surfaces. Guilt jabs in between his ribs. And he stays on the floor for a while, petting his scrawny arm. The gesture seems strangely familiar, unwelcome, for what it stirs in him.
The kid felt more comfortable on the cold, hard floor, in his company.
The kid seems to sense his unease, because his face twists, and his slender, crooked fingers twitch. He's shushing the kid before he realizes it. Wintergreen must be rubbing off him. Instead of being comforted, the kid whimpers.
(As if he now knows comfort is within reach. And just out of it. )
He sighs and picks the kid up. What is he doing?
He's still painfully light. If slightly less than when he brought him in. But Wintergreen's optimistic about his recovery. The kid's appetite is voracious. For the lack of a better word. Once encouraged and reassured, the kid eats everything. And he eats a lot. The reason the kitchen is his favorite spot for wandering aimlessly.
He puts the kid to bed, tucking the blankets around him to ensure the feeling of safety and comfort. And then lies next to him.
The kid doesn't stand for it. And headbutts him before his head hits the pillow. Curling next to him like he's always belonged there. And Slade ignores the part of him that says that the warmth pressed at his side feels just right. And lets himself drift off.
He dreams of lost children.
(He wakes up with needles in his arm, from Jason half-sprawled across him as if trying to phase into his ribcage. It's too early to deal with this, he tells himself, and goes back to sleep.)
(He doesn't push the kid off him.)
Excerpt, Old Mother Tabbyskins
#Begrudging caretaker slade wilson#jason todd#arkham knight#arkhamverse#dc#batman#red hood#the arkham knight#batfam#slade wilson#deathstroke#robin jason todd#robin
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Hello, may I get jaydick accidental child acquisition? (a/b/o or not)
Note: there's Dickjay way, way far down below the cut. My love of Dick and Roy being friends and Dick having a place in Lian's life got away from me. No capes, modern AU!
Dick happening upon a baby on the doorstep of the flat he shares with Roy and all he can do is stare, unable to process because he's just gotten off of a double shift plus some and he cannot with this situation.
He openly grimaces as he checks that he's on the right floor, that he's at the right unit and heaves the weariest of sighs because yep, it's them alright.
The pressing question is: is the baby Roy's or Dick's?
But then the baby cries and there's no time for Dick to think about it. He startles into motion, crouching down to mind the baby. Picking them up and being generally confused and intimidated because yeah, it's a baby.
The dark hair isn't promising if Dick is honest with himself. The green eyes give him some hope though. Those are definitely Roy's eyes. Right?
As Dick holds this baby at arm's length and stares them down, they look back at Dick in wonder and then they're giggling and, oh.
Dick smiles despite himself; smitten, easy as that.
'Hey, baby.' He says to them, bringing them close to hold them properly while crouching down to search the carrier and bag that were left behind.
Like out of every cliche, there's a note. While Dick reads it, he holds the baby - Lian - leaning away when she swats at him before tucking her head beneath his chin and forcing himself to breathe as he finishes reading the note, crumbled in his hand as he wraps himself around Lian and holds her dear and tells her she's gonna be alright and ahhhhhhh. ;3;
This isn't the dickjay portion, but it is the Roy portion:
Where there's a jump to Roy coming back home from his mechanic job. He's grungy, but chipper enough up until he opens the door and finds Dick sitting with a baby propped up on his legs and looking stressed as all get out.
Because Roy is quick, he puts together what's happened in an instant. And because he's a good friend, Roy laughs. Both Dick and he knew this day was coming. Who's the lucky lady? The dad look looks good on Dick! Just endless teasing as Roy goes over to see Dickie Jr.
Roy staring for a long moment, head tilting as he takes this baby in because - uh oh.
To confirm Roy's suspicions, Dick holds the note out to him. Which Roy snatches up and frantically reads because oh no oh no oh no.
While Roy goes through a crisis, Dick is all sorts of woeful because Dick is not the father but this baby is beautiful she's so sweet wtffffffff ;A;
Anyway, Roy is panicked. He's not ready to be a dad! He's not qualified, he's not--
Dick passing baby Lian to Roy, only for Roy to abruptly pass her back because 'don't do that, Grayson! I'll drop her!' Roy can't be trusted. He's just barely gotten on his own feet; he can't do this!
Lian thinks the game of pass the baby is funny. Dick and Roy don't quiet share the sentiment at that moment.
But yes, Roy is convinced that he can't do this. He just can't.
Only he does.
Of course he does.
Dick has full faith in him, too, even if Roy doubts and sells himself short.
Which leads to Dick being Dick, claiming that he has to go back to work to cover another shift. To which Roy adamantly argues against because Dick can't leave him with a baby; Dick's exhausted anyway. Stay!
But Dick 'goes to work' (he's sat just outside the door, or hidden in the stairwell) in a manipulative tactic for the greater good; it's tough love to show Roy that he's dad-material.
So Dick leaves. Roy struggles. (So does Dick because Lian screams and cries and Roy might, too. And he wants to help, but Roy needs this so Dick stays put).
Then eventually there's a father daughter heart to heart moment of connection and it's beautiful. Maybe Lian smiles that same smile that stole Dick's heart and Roy is just so taken despite being so incredibly overwhelmed and ahhhhhhh. Just cute little baby hand slaps to Roy's face as he has a breakdown; Lian comforting her dad and Roy is just so taken by her sweetness. Taking her little baby hand in his and kissing it, pressing it to his forehead while promising to take care of her fawoi;ejfaowijef;oajwef. Cute Roy and Lian sweetness. ;3;
And now the dickjay portion and spoilers they're cute:
Basically Dick's life is still hectic as ever, just in a different way. He trades in double shifts for more reasonable work hours and uses the free time to babysit Lian while Roy is caught up at his own job at the garage.
And Dick doesn't mind. He wants to help Roy however he can. Possibly more than that, Dick adores Lian with his whole heart. Of course he wants to spend time with her when he can.
Which leads to this: Dick running errands for their makeshift household, baby in one arm and shopping basket in the other
And what the hell Dick doesn't know what the fuck to buy for a baby. Why didn't Roy and him take pictures of what was stocked in the bag that Lian arrived with fuuuuuuuck
To make matters more stressful, Lian is not feeling it that day. Because maybe she's teething. Or the abrupt shift in her life has left her fussy. But point is she's stressed and it starts to stress Dick out, which stresses Lian out worse and it's a vicious cycle
Just Dick putting down his basket to try and comfort this screaming, crying baby and feeling helpless and frazzled because obviously something is wrong but she can't tell him; she doesn't understand how he tries to soothe her either and Dick is ;A;
Enter: Jason. An angel dressed in grunge clothing and who, despite his gruff tone, is polite when he asks if he can help. And just. Yes please. Help. Him.
Which eventually leads to Lian passing hands (after a comical exchange of keep-away because Dick is equal parts desperate and protective and paranoid) and it's like Jason is a baby whisperer because only a few moments later - she's calm. Soothed in an instant when she's brought to Jason's chest and Dick is just. Hold him, too? Dick is so damn distraught.
But Dick keeps his composure and smiles instead, relieved because Lian is finally not miserable. Big sighs and a weak laugh because he's bad at this parenting thing.
To which Jason calls it like he sees it: Dick was doing good. Not all parents are as patient. Not all of them care like that, either. So. Dick is fine.
Which flusters Dick just a little bit, because ugh. Maybe he needed to hear that a little bit. OTL
Dick asking after if Jason has kids, too. Or maybe younger siblings? Because Jason looks young.
Which is when Jason introduces himself as an au pair. Caretaker of babies of the infant and parent variety.
Dick smiling at the light teasing. Being especially fond because when Dick shifts Lian's arm to be in a more comfortable position, she holds onto Dick's finger which brings Jason and him real close and when they make eye contact there's something electric there and - whoah.
Dick finally getting a good look at Jason and being very 👀, which is only made worse when Jason comes to their rescue again by helping Dick shop for baby necessities.
Jason holding Lian the entire time, rocking her gently and Dick keeps getting distracted and no, nope. This isn't a thing for him. Not at all.
Only it very much is.
It doesn't help that the cashier compliments them on being such a beautiful family. Dick's thoughts were already straying; he didn't need the fantasy spoken into the world. Just Dick having all the internal screams because he's so far gone ffs.
Let this be a universe in which Dick is charming and likes to flirt, but that doesn't necessarily mean he has game. Just confidence being everything and Dick has plenty of it, but like. There are those few people he wants to impress and he's not scared to ask them out, but he wants it to last and doesn't want to come on too strong and basically he overthinks everything and gets lost in his own head and intimidates himself and ack.
Dick asking Jason out on a date and Jason startling at the come on, eyes wide and cheeks flushing
To which Dick panics because oh shit, too much too fast
Just because Dick has their future planned doesn't mean Jason is interested oh fuck
But Dick is smooth in his recovery, smiling the most devastatingly charming of smiles and gesturing to Lian when he says, 'Like a play date.' Because that's something babies do, right?
Jason breathing a sigh of both relief and disappointment because Dick is 👀 and Jason is not immune to attractive man doing his best to be a dad (/uncle/friend/person the situation is complicated and messy, but Jason is used to that)
ANyway, Jason agreeing and they exchange numbers and Dick floats all the way home
Like this man is straight up bouncy he's so giddy. When Roy gets back, it's to the sound of Lian giggling because Dick is so smitten in love and it's everyone's problem. //u///
Thus proceeds Dick borrowing Lian at every opportunity to hang out with the au pair and have little play dates with the babies. And Roy becomes so l: because 'dude, you're infringing on my time with my daughter.' But Roy doesn't get it, Dick has found the one. Lian is his wing-baby.
#dickjay#jaydick#dickroy friendship#buddy daddies au#caretaker!jason#dick grayson#roy harper#best dads#jason todd#jason todd is wifey material
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Prompt
Another mild amnesia case with Jason. But this time he forgot what he did to Tim at Titans Tower and occasionally gets little scraps memories that just pop into his head.
Jason ends up thinking he did far worse to Tim than he actually did.
#and tim who forgave Jason forever ago is absolutely confused#because Jason is actively avoiding him again#and refuses to touch him#or cuddle#and checks thrice if it’s ok to be in the same room as him#prompts#misunderstandings#miscommunication#amnesia#jason todd#batfamily#batfam#dick grayson#bruce wayne#tim drake#robin#fic#batbros#batdad#enemy to caretaker#angst
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i can't with fanon tim i hate everything about it. that he is addicted to coffee, that he's murder happy, that janet was a bitch, that jason was his robin, that titans tower thing, that 'poor tim everybody hurts him' but at the same time everyone is scared of him??? cause he's also better than everyone????, that dick wanted to send him to arkham, etc.
#tim drake#dick grayson#jason todd#bruce wayne#damian wayne#batman#batfam#i cant fr#you just wait and janet gonna be a bitch in wfa#hhhhhhh#like have ur fanon thats fine. but at least Know its not canon!!#canon vs fanon#enemy to caretaker my beloathed
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The idea of Jason Todd being a caretaker is so important to me for so many reasons:
It’s about the dichotomy of the violence of his character vs. the goals and sentiments he represents
It’s about how tough and masculine figures are still capable of caring deeply about the people around them in a way that is inherently viewed as feminine.
It’s about a child who didn’t receive enough care in a proper way growing up to be the one who can provide it for others and finding a sense of healing in it.
It’s about the depth and complexity of a young boy who wanted to help people changing, but at the same time growing into himself and finding different ways to do it.
It’s about how at his core, Jason is an incredibly sensitive and feeling person who craves forming deep bonds with others.
#and honestly#its about me projecting a bit#jason todd#slight character analysis#introspective#Caretaker Jason Todd#he’s so babygirl#I hold him very close to my heart
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Can we talk about how if jason and jazz got married and had a family (most of their kids would prolly be adopted), jazz would be the super successful breadwinner of the family and jason would perfectly fill the role of domestic housewife. He would mother hen SO HARD and he would love every minute of it. Three of his kids would climb him like a jungle gym while he did house chores like vacuuming and dishes and he would unironically drive a minivan everywhere. Jason = ideal housewife plz and ty
Jason? Housewife? I mean I can tell where you’re coming from fanon version of the guy but if you wanna do comic version of Jason, the dude would rather help Bruce on a mission than stay at home all day. Let me see what I can do because I mostly know Jason from when he was straight up a villain in comics.
Ok so he never really had a good father figure that shows what a dads meant to do. All of the stuff he knows is from asking friends on what to do, parenting books, Alfred, and books he’s read as a kid. Jason would be positively floundering with raising a bunch of kids at first. He’s good with kids so he does that just fine but dealing with kids for a long period of time? That takes some work. He doesn’t know what a normal kid is meant to do and what he can tell them. He grew up on Crime Alley and then became a billionaires ward. That’s quite the wild childhood living situation. What age do kids normally learn how to cook? How to lie? How to defend themselves? What are normal hobbies people have? All of these questions just swirl in Jason’s brain as he does his best to give his kids a normal life.
Jazz is the breadwinner while Jason is getting a solid 40% cut from mobs in his territory? I’d love a job that pays that much. I don’t think she’d be the breadwinner but Jazz definitely does a normal 9-5 job while Jason does stuff more at night. Jason staying with their kids during the day while Jazz is out of the house makes sense in that case. He spoils the hell out of his kids. He’s a massive pushover and does everything be can to prevent his kids from turning out like him.
He absolutely wouldn’t fit into your stereotypical role of housewife stuff. Still, imagining a 6ft tall 225lbs man of pure muscle and scars taking his kids to a local park and sitting on a park bench watching his kids run around and play while absentmindedly flipping a butterfly knife open and closed at incredible speed. Or threatening a kid who’s bullying his child with a whole ass Glock and then instantly switching to caring for his kid who got punched and checking them for injuries is some lovely mental imagery.
Additionally: Jason going to parent teacher conferences and forcing the school to implement disability accommodations classes for the teachers because one of his kids slightly mentioned that his teacher didn’t let him have extra time to work on his test like they should have. Casually cleaning his teeth with one of the scariest fucking knives you’ve ever seen while meeting with one of his kids friends parents. Bullying the principal to invite a mystery guest speaker to his kids schools for an Anti Drug PSA and low and behold, Red Hood walks into the school gymnasium and does a fucking incredible one man play and an almost poetic speech on the effects of drugs and how it can impact your families.
When his kids realize that they can simply climb on him and he doesn’t mind their weight they start doing it constantly. They scramble up his legs onto his shoulders and just sit there while Jason cooks dinner. The only sign that Jason acknowledges the kids presence is to warn them to not put their feet near the stove and to ruffle their hair when they get settled on his shoulders.
Jason not only has a mini van, it’s one of the most decked out mini vans to ever exist. This thing is built like a covert batmobile. You could take on an army of tanks with this car but he simply uses it to weave around traffic like a madman driving his kid to ice skating school.
Jason absolutely isn’t the ideal housewife but he’s a housewife that you Do Not wish to fuck with. You touch his kids and that’s the last thing you’ll ever do.
#danny phantom#jazz fenton#dc#dp x dc#writing prompts#prompts#dp x dc prompt#Jason Todd#bones replies#anon#Jason is the housewife with around 30 hidden weapons on his person#Jason is the most intimidating caretaker you’ll ever see
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