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derinthescarletpescatarian · 10 months

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hi derin! i’ve been following you for a little while, and also bemoaning the nature of publishing fiction (indie or trad) for a little bit longer than that, and i only just realized today that…of course web serials are a thing i can also do!

i really love the idea of publishing serially (though i’m not totally sure i CAN, i’d like to try), so while i add this to my list of potential paths, do you have any advice for getting started? building an audience? marketing? figuring out if writing/publishing this way will work for you to begin with?

i know that’s a lot of questions, and you don’t have to answer all of them! i’m throwing spaghetti at a wall out here. i hope you have a good day though, and thanks in advance!

Getting started in web serial writing

Web serial writing has the lowest barrier of entry of any major method of publishing your story. You can literally just start. There are two steps:

start writing your story

decide how/where you want to publish it

The writing part, I assume you have handled. The important thing to note here is that you gotta see the project through. Start and don't stop until you're done. For publishing, you have a few options:

1. Publish on a website designed for web serial novels

There are a few of these around, they're usually free to publish on (although most offer a paid account to give you ad space or boost you int he algorithm or whatever), and your best choice generally depends on which one happens to gravitate to a niche that best suits your kind of work. The big names in this industry are Royal Road and Scribblehub, which, last I checked up on them (about a year ago) tended towards isekai and light erotica respectively. (You absolutely can publish outside these niches on these sites, it's just much harder to get traction.) Publishing somewhere like this comes with multiple advantages. Firstly, there's a writing community right there to talk to; there's usually a forum or something where people gather to talk about reading or writing on the site. Second, the site itself is designed specifically to publish web serials, and will come with a good layout and hit trackers and 'where you left off' buttons for the reader and all that; generally all you have to do is copy-paste the text of a chapter into the page and the site will do everything else for you. Third, there's an audience sitting right there, browsing the 'latest arrivals' or 'most popular' page of the site; if you can get high in the algorithm, you have to do little if any marketing.

The downsides of such places usually come down to the same things as the advantages. Such sites are a flooded market. Your story absolutely will drown in a sea of other stories, a great many of them terrible, and most of them with the advantage of catering to the site's niche. Gaining an audience there is often a matter of trying to game an algorithm, and the community can be... variable. Some of these places are nice but most of them are a bunch of authors trying to tear down everyone around them to make their own work look better by comparison int he hopes of poaching audiences for their story instead. If you go this route, I'd recommend shopping around for a site that fits you personality and writing style (or just posting on many sites at once; you can also do that).

These places also tend to get targeted by scrapers who will steal your story and sell it as an ebook, which is very annoying.

2. publish on another site

Plenty of people publish web serials here on Tumblr. I do not know why. This site is TERRIBLY set up for that. It makes tracking stories and updates a pain in the arse (people end up having to *manually tag every reader whenever they post an update*), building and maintaining archives are annoying, community building is surprisingly difficult for a social media site, and it's just generally far more work for both writer and reader than it needs to be. You often do have a ready-made audience, though.

This does tend to work better on other sites. Reddit has multiple communities for reading and writing various types of fiction; publishing on these is a bit more work than somewhere like Royal Road, but not very much, and many of these communities are very active. There aren't as many forums around as there used to be, but you might be able to find fiction hosting forums, if that's what you prefer. And of course, many writers who simply want to write and don't mind not being paid choose to write on AO3.

These sites are a good middle ground compromise for people who want a ready-made community and don't mind putting in a bit of extra work.

3. make your own site

This is what I did. You can make a website for free, giving people a hub to find you and all your work, designed however you like. You can also pay for a website if you want it to be a little bit nicer. This option is the most work, but gives you the most control and leaves you free of having to worry about any algorithm.

The obvious downside of this is that there's no community there. If you host your work on your own website, you need to bring people to it. You need to build an audience on your own. This is not an easy thing to do.

Building an audience (general advice)

Here is some general advice about building an audience:

1. Consistency. Consistency. Consistency.

If you want people to read your writing, the best piece of advice I can possibly give you is have an update schedule and update on time, always. If you need to take a break, give people as much warning as possible and tell them exactly when you will be back, and come back then. Do not take unnecessary breaks because you don't feel like writing. (Do take breaks if you get carpal tunnel or need time off for a major life event or something -- your health is more important than the story.) If you're taking a lot of breaks to avoid burnout, you're doing it wrong -- you need to rework your whole schedule from the start and slow down updates to make these breaks unnecessary. Two chapters a month with no breaks is a billion times better than four chapters a month with frequent burnout breaks.

Consistency. Consistency. Consistency.

A reliable schedule is the #1 factor in audience retention. If readers need to randomly check in or wait for notifications from you to check if there's an update, guess what? Most of them won't! They'll read something else. You want your audience to be able to anticipate each release and fit it in their own schedule. I cannot overstate the importance of this.

2. If you can, try to make your story good.

We writers would love to live in a world where this is the most important thing, but it actually isn't. Plenty of people out there are perfectly happy to read hot garbage. How do I define 'hot garbage'? It doesn't matter. Think of what you would consider to be just a terrible, no-effort, pointless garbage story that the world would be better off without. Someone is out there writing that right now, making US$2,500/month on Patreon.

It is, however, a real advantage if you can make your story good. At the very least, it should be worth your audience's time. Preferably, it should also be worth their money, and make them enthusiastic enough to try to get their friends into it. Managing this is massively advantageous.

3. Accept that you're not going to get a big audience for a really long time. Write consistently and update on schedule every time anyway.

It took me over a year to get my second patron. For the first year, I updated Curse Words every single week, on schedule, for over a year, and had maybe... four readers. One of them was a regular commenter. One of them was my first patron. There was no one else.

My audience has grown pretty rapidly, for this industry.

You're not gonna start publishing chapters for a big, vibrant community. You're just not. And you have to keep going anyway. These days, I have a pretty good readership, and those couple of loyal readers (who I appreciate beyond words) have grown into a much larger community, who hang out and debate theories with each other and liveblog and drag in new readers and make fanart. My discord has over 550 members, with volunteer moderators and regular fan artists and its own little in-jokes and games and readers who make a point of welcoming newcomers and helping them navigate the discord, all with very little input from me. I start crying when I think about these people, who do the bulk of my social and marketing work for me just because they want to help, and my patrons who, after writing for over 4.5 years, have recently helped me pass an important threshold -- my web serial (via patreon) now pays my mortgage repayments. I can't live off my writing alone, but boy is that a massive fucking step.

You're not gonna have that when you start. You're gonna have a couple of friends. And that's it. Maybe for a year. Maybe less, if you're good at marketing and lucky. Maybe longer.

You have to update on schedule, every time, anyway.

Building an audience (more specific advice)

"Yeah, that's great, Derin, but where can I find my fucking audience?" Well, if you publish on a web serial site, then the audience is there and you jsut need to grab their affention using the tools and social norms offered to you by the site. I utterly failed at this and cannot help you there. You can still use these other tips to bring in readers from off-site.

1. Paid ads

I've never paid for ads so I can't offer advice on how to do it. I've Blazed a couple of posts on Tumblr; they weren't helpful. This is, however, an option for you.

2. Actually tell people that your story exists and where they can find it.

I used to have a lot of trouble with this. I didn't want to bother people on Tumblr and soforth by telling them about my personal project. Unfortunately you kind of have to just get over that. Now I figure that if people don't want TTOU spam, they can just unfollow me. If you're like me and want to just politely keep your story to yourself... don't. You're shooting yourself in the foot doing that.

You need to mention your story. Link your story in your bio on whatever social media sites you use. Put it in your banner on forums. Make posts and memes about it. Eventually, if you're lucky, extremely valuable readers will start to talk about your story and meme and fanart it for you, but first, you need to let them know it exists.

It will always feel weird to do this. Just accept that people can unfollow you if they want, and do it anyway.

3. Leverage existing audiences and communities

Before I started doing this web serial thing, I used to write a lot of fanfic. The original audience that trickled in for Curse Words comes from AO3, where I was doing a full series rationalist rewrite of Animorphs. They knew how I wrote and wanted more of it. Nowadays, I still occasionally pull in readers through this route. Most of my new readers these days come from a different community -- people who follow me on Tumblr. Occasionally I bring in people who don't follow me because we'll be talking about how one of my stories relates to something different, and fans of that thing might decide they want to check my stories out.

Your first readers will come from communities that you're already in and that are already interested in something similar to what you're doing (people reading my fanfic on AO3 were already there for my writing, for instance). Keep these people in mind when you start out.

One additional critical source of existing communities is your readers themselves. A huge number of my readers are people I've never been in any group with -- they were pulled in by their friends, relatives, or community members who were reading my stories and wanted them to read them too. This is an absolutely invaluable source of 'advertising' and it is critically important to look after these people. enthusiastic readers, word-of-mouth advertisers, and fan artists are the people who will bring in those outside your immediate bubble.

4. Your "where to find me" hub

If you're publishing on your own website, you can simply link everything else to your homepage, and put all relevant links there. For example, I can link people to derinstories.com , which links out to all my stories, social media I want people to find me on (you don't have to link all your social media), patreon, discord, et cetera. If you don't have your own website, you're going to have to create a hub like this in the bios of every site where you garner audiences from. This is the main advantage of publishing on your own website.

Monetisation

There are a few different kinds of monetisation for web serials, but most of them boil down to 'use a web serial format to market your ebook', which to be honest I find pretty shady. These authors will start a web serial, put in enough to hook an audience for free, and then stop posting and release an ebook, with the intention of making readers pay for the ending. Now, to be clear, I am absolutely not against publishing and selling your web serial -- I'm doing exactly that, with Curse Words. I am against intentionally and knowingly setting up the start of a web serial as a 'demo' without telling your audience that that is what you are doing, soliciting Patreon money for it, and then later yanking it away unfinished and demanding money for the ending.

Monetisation of these sorts of stories is really just monetisation for normal indie publishing with the web serial acting as an ad, and I have no advice for how to do that successfully.

Your options of monetisation for a web serial as a web serial are a bit more limited. They essentially come down to merchandise (including ebooks or print books) or ongoing support (patreon, ko-fi, etc.) Of these, the only one I have experience with is the patreon model.

This model of monetisation involves setting up an account with a regular-donation site such as patreon, providing the base story for free, and providing bonuses to patrons. You can offer all kinds of bonuses for patrons. Many patrons don't actually care what the bonus is, they're donating to support you so that you can keep writing the story, but they still like to receive something. But some patrons do donate specifically for the bonuses, so it's worth choosing them with care.

The most common and most effective bonus for web serials is advance chapters -- if people are giving you money, give them the chapters early. You can also offer various bonus materials, merchandise, or voting rights on decisions you need to make in the future. 'Get your character put in the story' is a popular high-tier reward. If you're looking for reward ideas, you can see the ones I use on my patreon.

Patreon used to offer the ability to set donation goals, where you could offer something when you were making a certain amount total or had a certain number of subscribers. They recently removed this feature because Patreon hates me personally and doesn't want me to be happy, so you kind of have to advertise it yourself now if you want to use these goals. I release chapters of unrelated stories at donation goals, and I found this to be far more effective than I thought it would be.

The important factor for this kind of monetisation is that it's ongoing. The main advantage of this is that it makes your income far more regular and predictable than normal indie publishing -- your pledges will go up or down over a month, but not by nearly as much as book sales can. The main thing to keep in mind is that it's not a one-time sale, which means that however you organise things, you want to make sure that donating keeps on being worth it, month after month. Offering bonuses that aren't just one-time bonuses, but things that the patron can experience every month, helps here. So does making sure that you have a good community where patrons can hang out with other patrons. (Offering advance chapters does both of these things -- the patron can stay ahead in the story and discuss stuff with other patrons that non-patrons haven't seen. I've found that a lot of my patrons enjoy reading an emotionally devastating chapter ahead of time, discussing it, and then all gathering a week or two later to watch the unsuspecting non-patrons experience it for the first time.)

Whatever method you use for monetisation, rule #1 is (in the words of Moist Von Lipwig): always make it easy for people to give you money. The process of finding out how to give you money should be easy, as should the process of actually doing it. And, most importantly, the spender should feel like it's worth it to give you money. This is a big part of making it easy to give you money. Make your story worth it, make your bonuses worth it, make sure that they're happy to be part of your community and that they enjoy reading and supporting you. And remember that support comes in many forms -- the fan artist, the word-of-mouth enthuser, the person who makes your social hub a great place to be, the patron, all of these people are vital components in the life support system that keeps your story going. And you're going to have to find them, give them a story, and build them a community, word by word and brick by brick.

It's a long process.

Good luck.

#web serials #web serial novels #writing #advice

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songfell-ut · 2 months

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Songfell anniversary post, pt 1

Eyyy so four years ago today, I posted the first three chapters of my story on AO3, having seen an unfinished comic and gotten permission from the artist to write a fic using her premise. This here is the first piece of Songfell art ever, commission from the OG comic creator, @lostmypotatoes 👌

So! I am not posting any new content for the moment. My mom has been having health problems, including me having to help take her to the ER (she's fine, just needs to stay in bed for a while), which delays actual writings a bit. What I am doing is reposting art from four years of Tumblr! C'mon down memory lane, wheeeeee

(Part 2, Part 3)

This is going to be in VERY VERY approximate chronological order as it depicts stuff in the story. Stuff with no set place in the story will be guesstimated because I have that power ah ha ha ha ha

Disclaimer: I've pulled all of these from posts or reblogs made by this specific blog. If I didn't see or repost any Songfell art you've done, especially for the videos, I did not leave it out on purpose. I threw in exactly one image from Discord for the sake of completing a set, but that was it.

In cases of multiple...okay it's just the fork scene that has multiple iterations because everyone liked it, but besides the opening one here (which is still my AO3 pfp!), the one that was the first piece of non-commissioned art I ever got will be first. Enjoy!

This was the first non-potatoes art in the videos, I believe, done by the superlative @venelona (probably the most prolific of the arts on here), when somebody realizes he's gonna lose 😘

The collection skips ahead to Sans contemplating killing the nice lady and then totally randomly thinking of Kris instead, by @mambourin D: But whaddya know--

See? That's the sound of losing, son

That's the sight of losing, by @sharkowskii, whose work speaks for itself. Here's the whole thing, colored fantastically by Vene.

Know what else they did together, and happens once he's been knocked out?

(Look at this so good holy shit) Frisk's had a bit of a tired, scared cry in the hall, and it's time to face her new guest head-on.

I lost my mind at least a little bit when I first saw these, ngl. I can't find the next page that she did for the compiled "movie" video 😢 But now we're coming up on a fun bit of Songfell lore!

I was scrolling through Tumblr and glanced over what looked like a picture of my Frisk ha ha that was kind of VENELONA DID A THING WAIT WHAT

First ever fanart, that's what. We have a High Priestess who is completely done with his goddamn nonsense, and

Pictured: goddamned nonsense. N-Not like he LIKES you, baka

Aaand here's my Discord pfp, by @xxkoichiixx (who seems not to be on here anymore D:).

And here's a very plausible alternate outcome by @vafro1.

Though this was a bit more like it, thanks to @naomyart.

Oh look a distraction after he was stupid what are the odds (Catler1!)

Last and never least (none of you are >:( so there), puns are dumb and it turns out they're into it. The End...for now

...

Bonus outtake recording illustration from @dale-the-human

#songfell #songfell anniversary post #dale's dogs fearlessly protect her against useable audio

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whispering-about-the-tmnt · 3 months

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Current list of my TMNT Fanfics!

The Bone Garden

You gathered up old papers, old photos… and you flipped through them, one by one, remembering…

Rating / Genre: G / Drama, grief, gen

Chapters: 1/1 (complete)

Word count: 400

TMNT Version: Various / Any

Warnings: Mentions of death

Notes: Originally written on Halloween, 2007 for the 2k3 episode, Same As It Never Was, but now I feel that it applies to The Last Ronin, as well... or really, any story where one Turtle remained after the others had passed on.

A Cup Of Good Cheer

April is afraid that she got Donnie the wrong Christmas gift this year, but Leo tries to convince her otherwise.

Rating / Genre: G / Holiday, family, gen

Chapters: 1/1 (complete)

Word count: ~3,400

TMNT Version: Various / Any

Notes: Autistic Donnie vibes

Displaced

An unprepared Donatello ends up on a Greyhound Bus to Springfield, Massachusetts

Rating / Genre: soft T / Mild drama, road trip, gen

Chapters: 6/6 (complete)

Word count: ~18,500

TMNT Version: TMNT 1987 / Archie run

Warnings: Blood, guns, mild peril

Notes: This was my first TMNT fic, which I originally posted some 25 years ago. It was written even earlier, though, for my father right after the 1990s movies came out.

Fleeting Thoughts

A collection of 100-word TMNT drabbles

Rating / Genre: G / Various, gen

Chapters: 9/?

Word count: 900 (so far)

TMNT Version: Various / Any

Notes: I know it is hotly debated what the length of a drabble should be, but I was always firmly in the 100-word camp.

Midnight On The High Bridge

The High Bridge between Manhattan and the Bronx has always been one of Michelangelo's favorite places to go for a late night ride on his board; but on this cloudy evening, he finds more than just fresh air and freedom high above the Harlem River.

Rating / Genre: G / M/F, Meet-cute

Chapters: 3/3 (complete)

Word count: ~8,100

TMNT Version: 2007, TMNT Adventures

Notes: Brings Oyuki Mashimi into the 2007 universe; takes place a year after the events of the movie

Passage

Leonardo has an appointment with death.

Rating / Genre: T / Drama, supernatural

Chapters: 6/? (in-progress)

Word count: ~7,830 (so far)

TMNT Version: Various / Any

Warnings: Death and dying, gore, blood

Notes: Written back in the early 00s…

Requiescat

Leonardo died today.

Rating / Genre: G / Drama, grief, poetry, gen

Chapters: 1/1 (complete)

Word count: 180

TMNT Version: Various / Any

Warnings: Mentions of death and dying

Notes: Written a couple decades ago...

The Scent Of Violets

Donnie and Mike are trapped underground with a memory

Rating / Genre: T / Drama, gen

Chapters: 1/1 (complete)

Word count: ~1,800

TMNT Version: Various / Any

Warnings: Blood, severe injury

Notes: Another one written in the late 90s, early 2000s (even I can't remember at this point)

Second Time Around

Two years after the defeat and banishment of Krang and Shredder, the Turtles and their human friends now have different, more personal challenges to overcome -- challenges that are made all the more difficult to deal with when Baxter Stockman and Karai pull them into a conflict that involves disentangling the complexities time itself.

Rating / Genre: T / Script, gen

Chapters: 19/? (in-progress)

Word count: ~28,000 (so far)

TMNT Version: Bayverse (2014-2016)

Warnings: Character death mentioned

Notes: A script/screenplay for a third Bayverse movie.

Something Wicked

He felt movement all around him; something like the wind, though the air was dead still. He backed against the curved sewer wall… holding his breath as his eyes scanned the pitch blackness. The feeling grew closer, touching him… a whisper against his damp skin…

Rating / Genre: M / Horror, suspense, gen

Chapters: 17/? (in-progress)

Word count: 50,400 (so far)

TMNT Version: Undetermined -- originally written for the 87 series/Archie run, but this new version is its own continuity

Warnings: Blood, gore, possible character death, whump, etc. Best suited for people that have no problem with slasher movies.

Notes: Originally written and posted a couple decades ago, now being put under an extensive rewrite

Still Waters

They say I'm the quiet one…

Rating / Genre: G / Introspective, poetry, gen

Chapters: 1/1 (complete)

Word count: ~200

TMNT Version: Various / Any

Notes: Also from over twenty years ago. A Donatello introspective.

Under The Influence

Leo is under the influence of… something

Rating / Genre: G / humor, gen

Chapters: 4/4 (complete)

Word count: 400

TMNT Version: Various / Any

Notes: Just a silly little four-drabble story I wrote when I wasn't feeling so well a bunch of years back...

When She Loved Me

She always said that I had his eyes. I don't know if I ever really believed her… after all, I never knew him. But I suppose they must be his. Her own eyes were deep and dark, almost black… reflective like mirrors. Mine are blue… light blue, like the sky. I think that sometimes she hated looking into them, because it was like she was looking at him again… like she was looking at my father.

Rating / Genre: G / Drama, gen

Chapters: 1/1 (complete)

Word count: 2,500

TMNT Version: TMNTA, the Archie run

Warnings: Parental abandonment

Notes: This is Oyuki's backstory as I see it. It was originally written and posted at FFnet back around 2000, though the fic is contemporary with the TMNTA Comics, setting its year at 1992.

#tmnt #teenage mutant ninja turtles #ninja turtles #tmnt fanfic #tmnt bayverse #tmnt 2k3 #tmnt 2007 #tmnt 2003 #rottmnt #tottmnt #tmnt mm #tmnt mutant mayhem #tmnt 2012 #tmnt 1987 #writers on tumblr

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meimi-haneoka · 6 months

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Cardcaptor Sakura Clear Card Chapter 79: Comments + JP-ENG translation differences

Welcome back to our monthly appointment, CCS fans! This chapter comes right after this month's full moon, the Hunter Moon! (lol yes I will feature the name of the relative full moon till the end of the story). And speaking of the end of the story, I will start this analysis and translation post from the end of the chapter, where I found the confirmation to the rumour that had been going on for hours before the official release on Comic Days:

yes, dear readers, this is not a drill, Cardcaptor Sakura Clear Card Arc will end with chapter 80, after 7 years of serialization! 🎉✨ When *the last chapter* is announced, there's no turning back! No more sudden announcements of extensions! 🥹 But at the moment of writing this post, no mentions have been given about any "epilogue" or extra chapters that might be serialized in the upcoming months leading to the big release of volume 16 on April 1st!

On the translation side, I have to sigh in relief because no major misunderstandings happened in the ENG version, just some minor inaccuracies! I was kinda scared because this chapter is pretty important and complex in itself.

And let me say that what happened in this chapter 79 definitely marks the end of the climax, so I can totally see it ending in next chapter. The chapter tackled some very important thematics regarding the presence of "evil" in this series, that I will talk about extensively in my analysis.

The announcement today made me already a bit nostalgic and sad, but I want to strive hard to accompany myself and all of you towards the end of this arc with excitement and a smile, therefore I won't let myself be prey of the sadness yet and introduce you immediately to the gif of this month, because there's a lot we need to talk about and analyze and we can't waste time!!

This is entirely dedicated to our protagonist and heroine Sakura-chan, because damn, she really slayed this chapter!!! Under the cut to see what miracles she made happen!

The Color Page

My dear readers, after years of countless pleas on my social media, after being let down month after month, CLAMP FINALLY GRANTED ME A COLOR PAGE SOLELY DEDICATED TO KAITO AND AKIHO TOGETHER ON THE SECOND-TO-LAST CHAPTER!! Yaaaay!! Excuse me while I celebrate this event here in my little corner, especially after having a rough month! 🎉🎉🎉 I hope my followers thought of me when they saw it? Like "finally she'll stop asking for it" (breaking news, I'll keep asking for more even after the series is over) 😂 It took them 79 chapters to do so and honestly I'm laughing because....yes, I admit it, I expected another vibe for such an important color page coming after such an important emotional scene in chapter 78, but honestly the first thing I thought when I saw it was "....they had to wait 79 chapters for this? 😧" 😂because it's very very "regular", I think it would've been ok for this to come out long ago. LOL I'm being brutally honest here, I hope no one gets offended, especially because that pet peeve aside, OF COURSE I love this precious color page to bits, and I know under its "normalcy", its got a very important meaning to the both of them.

Akiho and Kaito are depicted together clearly during one of their travels....but the question is, is this from the past? Or the near future? I'd daresay they look the same age they are now, so this might probably be a foreshadowing for the future...? They'll keep travelling the world? But seeing the content of the chapter, this might also be just a call-back to their memories together and everything that they experienced during those travels, tightening their bond. Travelling the world is, after all, really their thing, their element. I really like Kaito's expression, with his usual smile that almost turns into a smirk, he gives off a vibe of being finally free to express his emotions. He looks carefree, and that's really something for him. Akiho, on the other hand, is always so much more expressive than him and you can literally feel the joy and excitement emanating from her delighted expression. Travelling with him makes her happy, so yes, should this be what awaits them in the finale, it's fine by me as long as they're happy (I'm rooting for the other option though, the "stay in Tomoeda with your newfound support network" route).

But as you know, I always have to analyze the color pages a bit deeper, especially when they're about these two. And since I had to keep myself distracted, I made a bit of research. Other than the "travelling" vibe, this illustration gives off also kind of a "vintage" vibe (which is another strong element to Akiho and Kaito). It seems Akiho is dressed in a sleeveless coat with cape and wearing a bonnet fully inspired by those worn by children in the second half of the 1800s, in the Victorian era.

(pic courtesy of Etsy) This is a model from 1896, for example. When I pinpointed the period, I immediately thought "uh, the Victorian era is also the period when Alice in Wonderland came out", although that was more towards the 1860s. I found it really interesting and a nice touch for this illustration with a retro flavor (the suitcase and purse also look kinda vintage).

But another thing that immediately caught my eyes were those cute birds landing on Kaito's shoulder and Akiho's bonnet. I immediately tried to look what kind of birds they are, and it seems like they could really be eastern bluebirds, typical of North America. Searching further, I found out that in several cultures bluebirds are harbinger of happiness and symbols of hope. I couldn't honestly have thought for a more fitting symbolism, for these two. Especially cause birds often are associated with an imagery of freedom, and this is something else that these two need, after being hunted by evil people for so long. They really do look free, in this color page. Also, the presence of the birds in this color page immediately brought me back to the color page of chapter 62, where we can see baby Kaito in a wintery setting, sitting on a lamppost, extending his little hand to a swallow coming to him. Swallows are a symbol of hope and bring a message of "spring is coming", and continuing from that message of hope, of "spring is coming for you too", we can finally see here in chapter 79 our Kaito with his true happiness, symbolized literally by the birds most associated with happiness. Another thing that caught my eyes is of course the lily depicted on the cover of the book Akiho is holding, a nice callback to Akiho's mother and Kaito's torment, Lilie. She's always going to be with them ❤️

The Japanese editorial text over the picture is an excerpt of what Momo was musing to herself in chapter 39, while imagining to talk to Kaito: "You traveled with her, and spent time together with her". I think CLAMP chose to feature this line to indicate an important thing that will be restored at the end of this chapter.

Everyone Is Doing Their Best

The chapter starts with a panel showing some light coming off Yukito's house, and we find out that even Touya fainted, exhausted by the effort to keep time stopped as much as possible. Ruby Moon is cradling his head on her lap trying to assist him and "recharge" his magical power, in hope to be able to maintain time "stopped" a bit more. In fact, if you notice, the "black covering" that symbolizes the time-stopping spell isn't completely destroyed yet, but only riddled with "holes", an indication that the spell is still somehow active, even if feebly. I imagine this might "slow down" the attacks, which are still coming but probably not at full speed like they would if the spell came undone completely. I have to point out immediately a mild inaccuracy in the ENG version, that I want to specify in order to dispel extreme theories before they're born: no, Ruby Moon didn't give up all of her powers to Touya, the verb used here is simply 補える, "can replenish (your magic)", not "give all".

Touya doesn't lose his sense of humor even in a dire situation like this, and comments sarcastically "What are you, a battery?", a clear recall to the whole "batteries" matter that came out in the un-rewritten world. Touya isn't supposed to remember about that, and he probably doesn't, but this is just a way from CLAMP to show that even in a situation where memories have been rewritten, some things will be unconsciously said again, because they're just meant to happen.

Ruby Moon calls for assistance from her "brother" Spinel Sun (love how even in these true forms, she still calls him "Suppy"), whom rejects the appellative of "battery" but agrees to give her a hand with "recharging" Touya to keep the spell up a bit longer. Everyone looks outside, only one thought in their minds, which is voiced clearly by a serious Tomoyo: "Sakura and everyone else are fighting with all they've got". I have to point out a typo here in the Japanese version (nothing serious, it can happen and will be surely fixed in the tankobon version): Tomoyo calls Sakura "Sakura-san". I loved the "sparkles" around Tomoyo's eyes, as if indicating that her extraordinary intuition is "at work" and just telling her that, even if they can't see them because they're quite far away, Sakura and the others are doing whatever they can to stop these attacks. And the fact they can see the attacks, but not their friends and their condition, must be really hard to witness, for all of them. But no worries, there's Touya nii-chan who's always ready to lighten the mood even in this challenging situation, joking that "If they don't get back before the curfew, they won't be getting their snacks tomorrow!". Here the ENG adds "squirt" to make Touya refer specifically to Sakura, but truth to be told, in the JP there's no subject, so he might be referring to everyone. It's amazing how he's able to keep his spirit up and be sarcastic even in this situation....he really believes in his little sister so much!

I'll Make Them Forget About You

Back where our heroes are, the attacks keep coming relentlessly, countered by Syaoran, Yue and Kero in tandem. Sakura reflects on the fact that the only transparent Cards she's got left are these two she's holding in her hands (Time and Rewind) and Flight. This statement leads me to believe that when Record transformed into that crystal that entered her, that meant that the Card completed its duty and disappeared inside of her. But Sakura isn't worried at all, because she knows that she can create more Cards. Yessss, this development that I've been anticipating since quite some time is finally here! ✨🎉 Sakura seems to finally have a concrete plan, but before proceeding, she needs to ascertain something. She asks directly to Kaito: "The people who are using these spells were trying to hurt you, right?". Kaito, with a pensive face, answers affirmatively.

But it's when Sakura asks again "Were they trying to hurt Akiho too?" that his expression turns really painful, the background after him portraying well his raging emotions and, while Mokona-sensei chose to leave Akiho hidden by Kaito's black wings in the previous panels, now she finally shows how both she and Kaito are holding onto eachother, while our boy answers with a "...Yes" dripping with sorrow. It really squeezed my heart with pain, this scene. Because as long as Sakura was asking about him, his expression was pensive but almost as if it's something he's used to, that didn't shake him too much. But when Sakura mentions Akiho, god, that wrecked him. Any mention, any reminescence of what those bastards did to her and how they were chasing after her to put their filthy hands on her again wrecks him even now, and it's like Mokona with her visual skills is showing how Kaito seems to be holding Akiho a little bit tighter, while he answers Sakura's question. I also have to point out something that I had noticed already from last chapter, but a panel tricked me into believing I was just seeing things: CLAMP here use a dark screentone for Kaito's eyes, that he never had before (actually, no other character in CCS got this effect in their eyes). This effect will be used on him for the entire chapter.

And it seems like it's the very same screentone that was used for the dragon. I think this might be an indication that the wings aren't the only reminescence of his dragon appearance!

Sakura shows once again an incredible empathy that allows her to go right to the heart of the issue without investigating much. If Kaito rewrote an entire world, and if it's true that Akiho in the previous world didn't have all the love and familiar support she's got now, it means that she was probably in danger too. And seeing as these people are attacking them now because they freed Kaito from his "punishment", Sakura doesn't really need much to make 2+2 and understand the situation. Sakura believes in Akiho, therefore she believes in Kaito too, and knows that if he came to this point it's because they were in a desperate and dangerous situation.

Showing an incredible insight, Sakura shocks both Kaito and Akiho by asking:

Sakura, JP: "In that case, can I make those people forget about you both?"

Because our girl needs to make sure that the plan she came up with won't have any undesired consequences. But most importantly, she needs to have their consent. She reiterates this once again, actually she will make sure to ask Kaito and Akiho's consent 3 times in total. She says: JP, lit. "If going back to before the world was rewritten will put you through hardships once again, then, can I just make them forget?" Kaito is even more shocked, because he finally understands Sakura's intent. A generous, selfless intent born from a loving heart. Our girl wants to make sure that these two will be safe and sound once she fixes this situation. She can't take risks, because their happiness is all she's really caring for right now. And in his shocked expression, I can also see some kind of "omg YES, PLEASE" vibe. Because probably, having those terrible people forgetting all about them is everything he ever wished, but couldn't achieve. And I think it's really funny how we berated Kaito so much in the past chapters for making Akiho and the others forget facts that happened before and forgetting about him, but here Sakura just takes "inspiration" from him and actually decides to use that same "trick" in the right way. Because it's not fair that it should be them, the abused people, to forget about their most important person, in order to achieve a happy life for at least one of them. It isn't fair and it isn't right that Kaito was driven into making all the mess that he made, pushed by desperation. The abusers, that clan and Association of magicians, should be the ones forgetting.

But this is Cardcaptor Sakura Clear Card's finale, and Sakura definitely hasn't finished with being amazing yet, she actually just started. Her very strong power at this point allows her not only to see things that were difficult before, but also to connect the dots more easily thanks to that renowned instinct that I've always talked to you about, and that she learned to finally listen to.

As if she were seeing through him with X-rays, she confidently affirms that there's a book inside of him, a white book where you can inscribe magic on. And she also knows that that same book was inside Akiho, once. I guess this might be even coming from past memories of the unrewritten world (do you remember when, before the play started, Sakura said that she could feel something inside Akiho?). Akiho of course is shocked to hear that, and from her expression you can almost feel the chill that went down her spine in that moment. Sakura affirms that this book knows both Akiho and Kaito (thanks to the fact that it was inside both of them - something that I've always found painfully heartbreaking but also quite moving, for my ship), and it's got a very strong power inside of it. These will be two crucial things for Sakura's plan. In fact, our heroine is hellbent in attempting something pretty arduous: utilizing that artifact's power to create a new Card. For impartiality, I have to point out that the ENG added (completely on their whim) a "you, her special person" that isn't there in the JP version! Of course it's all the better for me, since they repeat (finally with the right adjective) that Kaito is Akiho's special person, but it's kinda funny that they messed it up so much in the previous chapters, and now they're adding it where there isn't any mention of it!

Sakura will be using a tool that knows the both of them, therefore she is sure that her plan will succeed, because the Card will know what it will need to erase. Sakura asks for Kaito and Akiho's agreement one last time. After hearing how those people wanted to hurt them both and even implanted the same magical artifact inside of her, Akiho is quite resolute and doesn't have any doubt: on with the wiping off! It doesn't matter who those people are, they've tried to harm her most important person and her too, so she doesn't really seem to give a damn about proceeding with this plan. Kaito, on the other hand, seems to be giving a more lackluster affirmative reply, but it's not that he's uncertain: he's just still riddled with guilt for all the mess that he's done, and he's probably realizing that now Sakura will need to put herself on the line in order to fix this and protect both of them, hence his sad face.

Still surfing the confidence wave, Sakura guesses that once those people have forgotten about Akiho and Kaito, then the magic arrows will stop too, and Kaito confirms that: forgetting about the person who had the Seal of D enforced on him will be equal to "undo" both the activation of the Seal itself (when Kaito removed the book from Akiho) and also the rescission of it (what Sakura did when she freed Kaito from the cage). This will therefore stop the arrows too, because the Seal wouldn't have been triggered in the first place. However, Kaito warns her that, although time is still barely "stopped" (because the time-stopping spell is still weakly on), it's necessary an enormous amount of power in order to do what Sakura wants to do. I have to point out another inaccuracy in the ENG translation in this part, which makes Kaito say "before things could get worse" and I have the feeling they misunderstood the word 辛うじて, "barely" or "narrowly", which is also written with the kanji of 辛い, "hard" or "tough". So Kaito isn't saying "before things could get worse" but actually meaning "although time is barely stopped".

Sakura doesn't seem to be scared by Kaito's warning, and activates her wand without a second thought, and immediately we can see that her task wil NOT be easy, as she can feel the strain almost right away.

Here we go with another inaccuracy of the ENG translation:

Sakura, ENG: "Great book, please show yourself! My power alone won't be enough...!" Sakura, JP: "The book....doesn't want to come out. (it's too difficult to pull it out) with just my power..."

Basically, Sakura isn't begging the book to "show itself", she's actually actively trying to pull it out of Kaito, and she's aware that it's opposing a lot of resistance, and her power alone isn't enough to take this damn book out. Sakura refuses to give up, because everyone else is doing their best too. Yes, everyone else.

And that's when CLAMP decided to bring us a big surprise for this finale.

A pair of hands seem to be appearing next to Sakura's, as if a spirit is hugging her from behind. We can see the famous fan that we learned to recognize so well ever since her first appearance in Movie 1. Sakura feels immediately the same magical power of Syaoran surrounding her, and with her instinct she finally recognizes her: it's Syaoran's mother, YELAN!!! We can see her, sweating and all, in her sacred chinese pavilion, lending her power to help in this difficult task.

What a great, welcome surprise for this finale!! You might have heard me saying on Twitter that Clear Card is really a celebration of motherhood, with this constant presence of mothers and mother figures who try to help these kids growing up without removing their right to choose for themselves. And since Yelan is the only mother figure who can concretely help Sakura in this moment, with her immense power, I really loved to see how this woman didn't hesitate to assist her future daugher in law. For any SyaoSaku fan, this scene here is a huge thing. We have seen in the anime how Yelan doted on Sakura ever since she met her in Movie 1, even before her own son realized his feelings for this girl. Yelan and Sakura haven't met in the manga yet (and hello, CLAMP, now this is a good chance for letting that happen, after the madness is over), but the woman didn't hesitate a moment to lend her power. I can really imagine how along these two will get, in the future. ❤️

Sakura thanks her aloud, while her eyes show that she's really really tired. Yelan's assistance is finally effective in summoning the artifact book out of Kaito, and we see again those countless book pages that we saw both when Akiho used to go "berserk", and also in the most heartbreaking scene of chapter 70. Kaito, still holding onto a worried Akiho, seems to suffer physically from this removal, and I can't understand if it's because removing something magical from inside is naturally painful (we've been shown something like that before, Syaoran crouching to the ground in pain while the Sakura Cards were being removed from inside of him) OR if the removal of the artifact also triggered his poor health conditions in which we left him, before he disappeared in chapter 70.

Sakura tries with all she's got and finally manages to turn the artifact into its "true form": a book filled with countless of spells written in strange magic runes.

You have spotted it, right? ☝️ I haven't seen many fandom reactions yet, but I guess this "cameo" made more than one person scream: it's Fay D. Fluorite's tattoo, yes! This page of the "book" is probably describing the procedure to cast that tattoo (which was also a kind of "seal", if I remember correctly). So that spells exists in this CCS world too! 😅 The magic Sakura is weaving starts "working" on the book, literally removing the spells from its pages and turning them back to their original form of magical books (remember that the Squids used to say that they would inscribe "magic books" and their power onto Akiho?).

Then, solemnly, we hear probably for the last time ever the magical incantation that accompanied us in the beginning of the story, used by Sakura to secure the strange manifestations of power into a transparent Card:

ENG: "Force without master, heed the call of my Staff of Dreams and become my power! SECURE!"

The countless of books and all this tremendous amount of power get secured into the birth of a new Card: BLANK!!!

Blank got the human appearance of Akiho, but also the protective wings of Kaito. The girl is holding a book (of course, how perfect for her) which is the representation of the artifact that was inside both Kaito and Akiho. This card is really so meaningful for someone like me who loves Akiho and Kaito. It's representing them united in their suffering (the artifact) but also in the hope for a better future (Akiho is smiling and the Card will be used to grant them safety, away from their abusers). I've always imagined that one of the last Cards Sakura might have produced would have Akiho and Kaito's elements, and here it is.

Also, how AWESOME is that Sakura managed to dispose of that damn artifact and succeeded to use it for Kaito and Akiho's sake, and turned it against the monsters who created it??? HOW. AWESOME. IS. THAT!!!!

Producing the very first consciously created transparent Card sucked almost all of Sakura's power and strength, and she's close to fainting, under the terrified eyes of Akiho, who lets go of Kaito for a moment in a gesture of going towards her "sister". But Sakura isn't done yet, no. She can't give up yet because her job isn't done.

And I Will Make Them Remember About You

Sakura wants for Akiho and the people who care about her (the ENG decided to translate this with "the people SHE holds dear") to remember who Akiho really is. She wants basically to "undo" what the rewriting of the world caused on the people who know Akiho, making them believe that she was born into the Kinomoto family and that she was Sakura and Touya's sister.

After pondering for a while and discussing with my friends over at my Discord server, I decided I'm not gonna go out on a limb and assume things from this decision, because I definitely NEED to read the next chapter to see how much Sakura intends people to remember, with this move. It's really not clear at all, as of now.

Anyway, other translation inaccuracy incoming!

Sakura, ENG: "I'm going to make another new card for that...and I might not have the power to do it alone" Sakura, JP: "It might probably be really difficult to create one more new card with my power, right now..."

As you can see, the nuance is different, because Sakura in the JP addresses how it's almost impossible for her to create another new card in the situation she is in right now, exhausted and all.

That's why, very cleverly, she's going to do something different. (My gosh how proud I am of this girl!!)

Saying "But these two Cards will surely help me", Sakura skillfully manages to merge Time and Rewind to create a new Card, not from scratch (which requires more power) but using what she's already got: and that's how the REMIND Card is born!!! The name of the Card originated by just replacing the "W" of Rewind with the "M" of Time. Ingenious, isn't it???

And as the two Cards merge, they give us lots of flashbacks, like the "effect" used here resembles a lot the one that used to happen when Sakura was changing the Clow Cards into the Sakura Cards back in the old arcs, or how the merging of two Cards seems to also be a callback to how the "card without name" and the "Nothing" merged to create HOPE in the very last minutes of Movie 2! What a nostalgic trip down the memories lane!

And the appearance of this Card is even more touching, because it features Syaoran (with his current age) holding Nadeshiko's pendant watch. I found that so sweet, especially coupled with Yelan's assistance to Sakura in this chapter. Yelan associated with Sakura, and Syaoran associated with Nadeshiko. How sweet. And when you think that even Lilie, Akiho's mother, was associated with Kaito, you really can realize that this is some kind of "theme" that CLAMP seemed to be wanting to portray in this story.

I Can't Be On Everyone's Side

And now, the scene that I think is worth the whole chapter, but probably the whole Clear Card Arc in its entirety. As usual, with important scenes, I'll use the literal translation from Japanese:

Sakura, JP: "It might not be right that there'll be people who will forget things (after this), but....I can't be everyone's friend/ally/can't be on everyone's side. So I won't go back...but actually, along with the people important to me... I WANT TO GO ON"

Wow. Let that sink in.

Sakura, of Cardcaptor Sakura, just came to the realization and spelled out clearly that she cannot be on everyone's side. That she cannot be "everyone's friend", like in a cheesy fairytale.

And I really, really, want to thank CLAMP-sensei for this scene and this line because for a period, long time ago, I was worried that this story would go down the "let's be friends" or "let's show sympathy to them" route. But as the chapters continued and the things CLAMP told us about the Association and the Squids were more and more cruel, and they made me more and more sick, I started to realize that there was simply no way CLAMP could've had Sakura try to justify or compromise with them. Because when cruelty is real, there's no compromise to be made.

This scene also shows how Sakura realizes for the first time ever that in her world, contrary to what we all believed previously, evil exists. It might not touch her or her "entourage" directly (and she's really blessed for that), but it exists out there and it's hurting people, people who can also become really important to her. And she decides to not stand idly by, blessed as she is with the luck of not experiencing that evilness, but actually using whatever it is in her power to bring those suffering people to safety.

Sakura cannot fight those people on equal terms. She's just 13, and although her power is very strong, she's still inexperienced. Moreover, she cannot really bring herself to deny her current nature and use violence on other human beings. That's not Sakura. I want you guys to reflect on this because I know that one of the favorite things expected for this finale was to have a direct magical confrontation with the true villains of this arc, defeating them and restablishing the peace. And I am sincere when I say that I would've wished for the same too, because you know how much I love Kaito and Akiho, and how much I was disgusted to read about what they did to them. I've spread my "burn the squids" gifs all over the fandom. I wanted someone to vindicate them. But not here. Not in this manga. I realized that after the initial satisfaction, I would've probably felt like the series would've been "defiled". And that's exactly what happens when you answer to violence with more violence.

Sakura just could not go hunting those bastards down and defeat them in a magical battle. Because, powerful and corrupted in their greed as they are, the only way to "fix" this situation would've been to exterminate them. I just could not picture this story to cross that boundary, no matter how much the bar had already been raised well over what we initially thought.

So, if someone out there is disappointed by this outcome, I'm sorry for you, but it was just not meant to be and I'm actually really glad that this series kept true to its fundamental values. Of course it would, CLAMP really do care about this series and they know very well how far to push the plot, and when to actually stop.

So what is the role of Akiho's clan and the Magic Association in this story, especially considering that we never saw their faces at all? Talking with lots of fans in these years, especially Japanese, I've come to the conclusion that they are not in this story to fill the "villain that needs to be deafeated" role, but actually they're a representation of abusive families that smother and suffocate their children with expectations, completely disregarding those children's natural inclinations, and abuse them when they do not meet such expectations, but also the society as a whole, that looks at you only basing on how it can take advantage of you. Which is exactly what happened to Akiho and Kaito, driving them to very dark places. The absence of faces for those characters makes it possible for the readers to see the Squids and the Association as the representation of whatever environment they relate the most to. It can be family, society, school, workplace etc... It also helps us focusing on their actions, rather than their faces, and not attribute any prejudice to them (because of religion, race, skin color, or whatever other attribute they could have).

Seeing as the story treats them more like a concept, than an actual entity, it's basically impossible for Sakura to defeat them (and their great power is an indication of that impossibility). Just like in real life, darkness will always exist, along with light. Good and evil will always be side by side. It's bigger than any of us. Then, what can we do, in a situation like this? What Sakura is choosing to do, here, is not to confront directly with violence these people who are way out of her league, and not even to sit back and look, but actually finding a way to make them forget about her friends and keeping her friends safe, granting them the possibility of living a happy life, finally away from the darkness of the past, healing the wounds on their souls together with the people they love and who love them back. Because even if you've been abused in the past, you can still hope for a happy life.

The focus here is all on helping the abused people. And Sakura, in order to do that, is okay with coming to terms with the fact that she can't be on everyone's side, and she needs to choose. In the end, the thing that really matters the most is to GO ON with your most important people. Not going back to what is lost, but going forward. And I know that this is such a CLAMP theme, and I'm glad that they reiterated it in this arc. When I say that Clear Card brought Sakura so much more closer to what's usual for CLAMP, I mean this.

The panel with Sakura raising her staff and shouting she wants to go on is absolutely beautiful, with those wings growing so big and unleashing Sakura's power in a storm of cherry blossom petals.

Sakura is exhausted, she finally reached her limit by using her ultimate magic. As she faints, her eyes just make it in time to catch a glimpse of her prince, the love of her life grabbing tightly his girlfriend's hand, to not let her fall, while the watch of Remind and the book of Blank do their job in the background. And I really loved this spread too, because even if it's not a conventional romantic scene made of physical display of love, this in my opinion is even more powerful. Many were reminded of Tsubasa, but I was also reminded of the long time those two spent unable to touch one another, and this scene here seems like a catharsis for that hardship they went through. Syaoran will always catch Sakura everytime she falls, he will always be there to grab her hand, no matter if he can really touch her or not. Cause his love is stronger than any kind of impediment. He will always be by her side, no matter what. When she's exhausted by her heroine's duties, she knows that she can always count on him to support her.

And speaking of "always be by her side", I just can't avoid mentioning how Akiho and Kaito stayed "glued" to eachother for the entire duration of this chapter, protecting and supporting one another. Kaito, in particular, kept holding Akiho even as Sakura's magic was hurting him like hell, because it was extracting the book from him. Even in excruciating pain, he did not let go of Akiho, intent in protecting her and keeping her safe in his hold. Akiho let go of him just for a moment when she was scared out of her mind for Sakura, but went back to him when she saw that her "sister" was hellbent in completing her task no matter what. Kaito, as the good "moon boy" he is, is someone who shows his feelings through his actions rather than words, just like Syaoran. And his constant grip on Akiho in this chapter, such an opposite act compared to how he used to stop his hand everytime it started reaching out to her, told me all that I needed to know about him: she's his most important person, and he will never let go of her, ever again.

Sakura wakes up in her bed. The scene is a direct parallel with an almost identical scene in chapter 3, as you can see here:

Kero is next to her and is relieved to see her awake, so he goes to shout in the hallway, directed to Touya, that Sakura is finally awake. Sakura seems a bit surprised to see Kero talking so nonchalantly with her brother, and he tells her that he chatted with him back at Yukito's house, together with Suppy, so I guess now he finds it "natural" to talk to her brother too! 😂 I'm kinda glad to know that, I like this "change of relationship", compared to the old series (and it was also kinda long overdue).

Sakura opens the palm of her hands and she finds the Dream Key, still intact and all. She also asks about Remind and Blank, and Kero confirms to her that she was able to use them successfully! Sakura is absolutely delighted to hear that, and says "We were able to go on!"

And thaaaaaaat's how the second-to-last chapter of Cardcaptor Sakura Clear Card ends! Solving a lot of the pending situations, but still leaving some secondary questions that will surely find a (more or less) detailed explanation in the final, next chapter. And well, we also have to prepare to not have ALL the answers to ALL the questions we might have. This is usual for CLAMP, and especially in their Spaces they never made it a secret that they love for their fans to wreck their brains over theories and imagining the characters' future after a series is over. They love for the fans to give their interpretations to things, they encourage that a lot (also because it creates more long-lasting engagement with their series).

Alas, I expect they'll leave something in particular to everyone's interpretation, but we'll see. 😅

Overall, I really loved this chapter and it was really emotional for me. I think it's fitting for a "climax". Sakura was ABSOLUTELY running the show and after this I dare anyone to say that she isn't the main character of her story. She pushed her limits, and even questioned her own morality in doing so. What a wonderful thing. She reminded me so much of Sakura-hime when she shooted all those monsters in order to take the precious egg, back in the Acid Tokyo arc of Tsubasa. She knew she was doing something bad, but her wish to do everything needed in order to "have him back" was stronger than anything else. And she made her own choice. Here, Sakura, on a smaller scale, made her own choice too.

Now, I hope in the last chapter we'll be granted the possibility to delve a bit more into Kaito and his thoughts, I need to see his character development, I need to see that he learned something from this. That he -at least- started to interrogate himself over the nature of his feelings for Akiho. I know it's reasonable to think that with him, things will take looooong time, but as least show me the signs. Because I need to know that Akiho will be truly happy with him (I know she will!), and she can only be if he's learned to be honest with himself. And learned what Lilie meant with the last conversation we saw between them.

Also, WHERE'S MOMO, I NEED TO SEE MOMO BEFORE THIS ENDS!!

Okay, this is probably the longest post I ever did but I think as the second-to-last chapter it deserved to have some big thematics explored in depth, because they're very important. I'm still pondering if I should divide the post of the final chapter in two because, in addition to even more pages, I expect there'll be soooooooooo much to talk about (cross your fingers with me that there won't be any translation mistake).

I also hope there'll be room for an epilogue or a couple of extra chapters, to help us coping with the separation in a more gradual way, cause after 7 years it's quite hard. I was curious to see the end, of course, but also not entirely ready to let this wonderful story go. I really, really enjoyed it and I say this from the bottom of my heart. I don't care what everyone else thinks, I can only be grateful to CLAMP for Clear Card Arc. 🙏

Chapter 80, along with all the tears that will come with it, is expected to be uploaded on November 29th on CLAMP's Youtube channel. Yes, it's less than a month away! I also expect some news about the anime (BLESS THE ANIME!! Something to cling onto when the manga is over 😭).

Well, see you at the end of November (please come to hold my hand cause I cannot do this alone, lol) !!!

#cardcaptor sakura #card captor sakura #ccsakura #clear card arc #ccs spoilers #sakura card captor #chapter 79 #sakura kinomoto #akiho shinomoto #yuna d. kaito #syaoran li #translation differences

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sequinsmile-x · 6 months

Text

Stained Glass Windows - Chapter Fifty Five

Life was complicated, but they wouldn't have it any other way.

-x-

Hi friends,

Today makes it one whole year since I posted the first chapter of Stained Glass Windows. I cannot believe a year has passed and I'm still writing this fic, and that you're all still reading and interacting with it!

I love this version of them and am forever grateful that you do too. I have so much more of their story to tell, so who knows if we'll still be here on 28th November next year!! I'll still be writing it, if you're still reading it.

As ever, thank you so much for your support, I'm endlessly grateful and blown away!

Please let me know what you think of Chapter 55 (!!)

-x-

Words: 2.2k

A full list of warnings for the fic can be found on the Series Master List. Please note that the warnings have been updated for this chapter.

Read over on Ao3, or below the cut

Emily wakes up slowly, a luxury that had not been afforded to her very often since Lily had been born just short of five months ago. She stretches, but the movement is interrupted by a meow. She opens her eyes to find herself face to face with Sergio, the cat sitting on Aaron’s pillow as he looked down at her.

“Morning, Serg,” she says, yawning as she reaches up to scratch his head, smiling as he leans into her hand for a second before he climbs on top of her, resting his head on her chest. She chuckles to herself as she looks back and forth between her husband’s empty side of the bed and the empty bassinet on her other side, “Everyone else is awake, huh?”

She grimaces as she shifts her hips, the pain that had settled into her lower back and belly the night before making itself known now she was awake.

Her periods had been more inconsistent than she was used to since she’d had Lily, even though she’d gone back on birth control as soon as she was cleared to by her doctor. The last several days she’d had the usual warning signs that it was coming - the slight nausea she’d feel in the lead up, the dip in her mood, so when it had started in the middle of the night when she’d been woken up by her daughter, she wasn’t surprised.

Aaron had also been woken up by Lily, but barely. He hadn’t been home when they went to sleep, a long case having kept him away for several days. Lily’s cries had torn him from sleep, but his eyes were all but glued shut as he mumbled, his words barely escaping as he asked his wife if she needed help. Emily had shaken her head at him and leant down to kiss his forehead, a whisper to go back to sleep against his skin as she told him what was happening, that Lily was fine and she herself just needed a pad and some painkillers, a level of honest intimacy she had once thought she would never have with another person. He’d fallen asleep almost immediately, although at the time she wasn’t entirely sure he’d ever actually been awake.

He’d clearly remembered when he woke up that morning, giving her time to wake up slowly by taking Lily elsewhere in the house, making sure his wife had a much needed lie in and time to herself. She knew it was for him too, that he loved to spend time with his little girl, one on one time he desperately missed when he was away on a case.

“We should probably go find them,” she says to Sergio, smiling when he meows, almost in protest, rubbing his face in her chest. She gives him one last head scratch before she sits up, shaking her head as he cat runs and jumps off the bed, already out of the room before she’s swung her legs out from under the covers. She groans as she stands up, her cramps briefly getting worse as soon as she’s upright, but it passes and she shakes it off. After going to the bathroom she heads downstairs, eager to see her husband and daughter.

As she steps into the kitchen she smiles at the sight she’s met with. Aaron has Lily safely secured in one of his arms, the little girl smiling and giggling as he talks nonsense to her whilst he makes a cup of coffee. He smiles at Emily as she walks in, already reaching for another cup to pour her some coffee too.

“Hi sweetheart,” he says, kissing her cheek when she walks over, “How are you feeling?”

She groans as she leans against the counter, reaching out to run her fingers through Lily’s hair before she responds, “Let’s just say one thing I miss about being pregnant is the lack of periods.”

“That and the unlimited access to fast food,” he says, smiling at her before he turns his attention to Lily, bouncing the baby girl in his arms to make her giggle, “I half expected you to come out looking like a nugget.”

Emily hums and takes Lily from him, pressing repeated kisses against the side of her daughter’s head as she settles her into her embrace, “Daddy says that like he’s not the one who took me to McDonalds whenever I asked, Nugget.”

Aaron smiles at the use of the nickname they’d used when Emily was pregnant, one they had rarely used since Lily was born. He wraps his arms around both of them and kisses his wife’s temple and then the top of his daughter’s head, giving himself a moment to breathe them both in after a few days away on a case. They’d both been asleep when he got home, the house peaceful and quiet as he walked slowly to maintain it, slipping into bed next to his wife and dropping a kiss to her forehead before he fell asleep himself.

“Don’t worry Lily-Pad, even if you had come out looking like a nugget you’d have been the cutest one I’d ever seen,” he says, kissing Emily once more before he steps away, “I was about to come up and ask if you wanted me to make you anything for breakfast.”

The thought of eating anything turns her stomach and she shakes her head, “No thank you, I’m not really feeling up to it.”

He furrows his brow, “Are you okay?”

She makes a face at Lily as the baby makes a noise before she looks back up at her husband, purposely hiding a wince as her stomach cramps again, “I’m okay I promise, my doctor said it could be worse for a little while after I had her,” she smiles at Lily and grabs one of her hands, smiling as her tiny fist wraps around one of her fingers, “You’re worth it though, huh sweet girl?”

He can’t help but smile as he looks at his girls together, still unsure sometimes how this was his life, how he’d been so lucky, “But you’ll tell me if it gets worse? Let me know if I can help?”

Emily nods, “Of course.”

She doesn’t mean for it to be lie, but it ends up being one.

___

She feels worse throughout the day, the pain so much more intense than she’d anticipated. She doesn’t want to worry Aaron, sure that she’s just being dramatic, that her body had forgotten how awful this could be, so she plays it down. Acts as if she’s okay until she can’t anymore, Lily’s bedtime just on the horizon.

“Honey?” Emily asks as she plasters on a smile for her husband when he looks at her, shifting his attention from the TV show they’d been watching that she hadn’t paid any attention to, “Would you mind doing bedtime?” She asks, maintaining her smile when he tilts his head at her, Lily content and laying in her arms, fresh from her bath, “I feel like I could do with a bath myself.”

He looks concerned as he nods, her love for singing their little girl to sleep at night well established, “Of course, sweetheart.”

“Thanks.”

“You don’t have to thank me, she’s my daughter too. It’s not like I’m a babysitter,” he jokes softly, his concern only deepening when she smiles tightly at him, “Are you sure you’re okay, Em?”

She nods as she presses a kiss to Lily’s hair, “I’m fine,” she says, not sure she believes herself, before she kisses Lily again, “Love you sweet girl, Daddy is going to do bedtime,” she hands Lily to Aaron and stands up, her fists clenched at her side as she digs her nails into her palms as standing causes a wave of pain, “She…” she drifts off as she stops herself from telling him what he already knows, a real smile flashing across her face, “Right, you know what you’re doing. Sorry.”

He reaches out and squeezes her wrist “Never apologise for loving her, Em.”

She smiles and nods at him, “I’m going to get in the bath, meet you in our room in a bit?”

She waits for him to nod in response and she leaves the room, her smile slipping off her face when she knows she’s no longer in view. She gies herself a moment and leans against the nearest wall, breathing out a slow breath as she presses her hand into her belly, a vein attempt at easing the pain.

“Fuck me,” she says under her breath as she starts to walk towards the stairs, “I forgot how much this sucks.”

The bath does make her feel better. The hot water soothes her sore, aching body. She stays in the water until it starts to cool, until the scents of the essential oils she’d selected have long since faded, a shiver going up her spine eventually forcing her up onto her feet. She smiles as she hears Aaron walk around the bedroom, clearly taking the time to do some cleaning whilst he was alone.

Her smile fades as the pain returns when she’s upright, somehow worse than it had been all day. Any pretence that she was okay, that this was normal, slips away as she stands out of the bath, her thighs sticky as she tries to take a step, her skin pressing together in a way that immediately feels uncomfortable, her eyebrows furrowing at the unpleasant sensation. Her eyes go wide as she looks down, blood staining her pale skin that had been clean moments ago. For a moment she’s transfixed as a drop of blood falls into the still full bathtub she’s standing in, disappearing into water and half-burst bubbles as it’s diluted, almost beautiful in it’s distruction.

Something was wrong.

“What is going on?” She asks herself as she climbs out of the bath, supporting herself on shaking hands as she gets her balance. She walks over to the toilet, her legs leading her of their own accord. As soon as she sits down she feels another wave of pain and she leans over, desperate to find some relief in any way she can.

She groans, her hand pressed into her belly as the pain gets even worse, briefly stealing the breath from her lungs. It was familiar, a phantom of a sensation from when she was in early labour with Lily, hours before everything went to hell and any vague control she had of the situation was stolen from her.

It reminds her of Rome. Of hiding in the bathroom at school with her teeth sinking into the heel of her hand as she rode through the worst of the pain, only to walk out into the hall moments later and act as if she was okay, as if she wasn’t worried she could pass out at any second.

She gasps as everything clicks into place all at once.

The mastitis. The antibiotics she’d been on as a result. The fact they would have rendered her birth control useless, something she would have thought about if she wasn’t sleep deprived, if her baby was sleeping through the night. Exhaustion masked by the tiredness she already felt, sore breasts that she had attributed to breastfeeding, something that had become part of her day-to-day life since having Lily.

The damn cat was all over her. Showing her affection he’d only ever shown her when she was pregnant.

She was pregnant.

She had a feeling she wasn’t anymore.

She wants to stand up but doesn’t think she can, the pain so intense it was radiating down to her thighs, simultaneously making them feel numb and like they were on fire.

“Aaron,” she calls out, hoping he hears her through the door of the en-suite. She gives it a moment and after she doesn’t hear anything she tries again, her voice louder this time, “Aaron.”

She sighs in relief when she hears him, his feet against the floor as he climbs out of bed and makes his way to her. She's grateful she didn’t lock the door, that she never did.

It had been a long time since they’d had any secrets from each other.

Any concern he’d been feeling increases when he walks in and finds her sitting on the toilet, her hand pressed firmly into her lower belly. There were tears on her cheeks he won’t acknowledge, well aware she probably didn’t even know they’d fallen.

“Em, sweetheart,” he says kneeling on the floor in front of her, hitting the ground so quickly his knees crack, the sound echoing around them. His eyes go impossibly wider when he looks at her skin, at the red streaks against her alabaster skin, “What’s wrong?”

She presses her lips together as she shakes her head, desperately wanting to hold the words back, wishing with every part of her that she didn’t have to say it out loud. That she didn’t have to make it real. But she knows she has to.

“I…I think I’m having a miscarriage.”

-x-

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grabyoursaintsandpray · 7 months

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Almost missed it due to only just getting home but today marks the anniversary of posting the first chapter of 'Here comes the night'.

In honour I was going to try to get home from work, finish off then post a new story I'd been working on but definitely not how today worked out so I thought instead I'd share a few random facts about the story of honour itself.

Posting this broke an insane writing dry spell for me, the last thing I'd posted (that wasn't me copying my Livejournal stuff across onto ao3) was way back in 2013 on ff.net

The title is from a song that got stuck in my head because of the word 'night', I'd been humming it as I booted up my laptop the next morning. Originally this was just a placeholder title but after listening more intently to the lyrics I realised it fit perfectly.

That song is 'Here comes the night' by Tokio Hotel, admittedly not a band I'd listened to since my teenage obsession with them years ago (don't judge 😅) but it came up on a Spotify playlist and it's very catchy.

Every chapter title is also the songs lyrics that I thought best fit that particular chapter. Something I came to regret as my chapter count grew and I was running out of lyrics.

I never intended it to be so long. I actually fully thought I'd have it easily wrapped up before Christmas and if not then I'd finish it up over the holidays while I was off work but the story completely possessed me and I couldn't stop writing it.

My favourite chapter is probably 12 where they spar and Elsa kisses him for the first time and it of course all goes downhill, that whole scene was one of the first ones I had in my head from the start and I was so excited to write it.

While I have written many things over the years for lots of different fandoms, this story is definitely my favourite. It's brought me so much joy both in writing it and reading everyone's reactions to it and I'm so grateful to this little fandom we all share 😊

#werewolf by night #werewolf by night fanfiction #jack x elsa #elsa x jack #jack russell #elsa bloodstone

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mimiwrites2000 · 9 months

Note

For the AruAni writers questions:

1, 3, 4, 14!

MOON THANKS FOR THE ASK

Ok let’s start

1- share your favorite part of your latest fic

Well, my latest fic is Legends, and its latest chapter is 22

Here’s my favorite part of this chapter:

The chandelier’s crystals meandered between stairs’ white stonted rails, threateningly pointing down, accompanied with translucent, thin selenders of glass that softly clacked against each other with the softest breeze, playing a soft melody of charms, harmonizing with the contrasted fireworks going off in the distance. The fireworks exploded in the sky, their light reflected wobbling charades on the carpet, sparks of silver and gold emitting from the chandelier in various, spontaneous directions, like fairies in the books Armin’s grandfather used to read for him.

Armin watched it all.

“Can you walk?” He asked Annie, in a soft voice, careful to not disturb the lights.

“I can walk, I am walking,” She answered him, judging him with half lidded eyes. Her arm around Armin’s shoulders and her knees bent with drunkenness as she dragged herself beside Armin, or more like Armin dragging her beside himself.

He eyed the stairs, and then eyed Annie.

“I’m sorry,” he said as he bent, putting his arm behind her knees, lifting her up. She gasped, her arm around his shoulders tightened, the other arm wrapping around his neck. “I am really sorry,” he apologized again, because he held her without her permission, even though that was the only solution at that time. He made sure his hand didn’t touch her, her dress a barrier between his fingers and her skin.

He ascended the stairs, one step at a time. He held her close to his chest, making sure her weight was secured in his arms, and a spark of happiness filled his heart as her body felt healthier, remembering the first time he ever held her, at the harbor, exactly three years prior, after years of being suspended in air, engulfed within a cold crystal.

That day at the harbor he lost her but a miracle, a Legend, paved his way to her and he found her, that day they were given a second, wasted chance.

That day, he held her out of the war's rubble, in the middle of fire and thunder, her body limping against him as he carried her to safety.

That day, he learnt about a Legend, and today, another Legend unfolded itself.

None of these Legends would have happened without them, without him, without her ; she was behind it all, an irreplaceable component in that concoction.

Because they were those Legends, and those Legends were them.

They were created to be a Legend.

The striking memory made reminiscing feelings crawl on his back with hundreds of pointy, sharp edges, reaching his fingers and numbing them, so he held her even closer to his chest. He miraculously saved her that day, maybe that wouldn’t happen today, maybe it would never ever happen, but for that moment, while the world outside was launching celebratory colorful fires in the midnight sky, celebrating their deaths, he chose this moment of peace, on carpeted stairs, at a foreign hotel.

3- If you look back at your first fic compared to your last, what’s changed?

MANY THINGS, my writing style changed so much, my English got stronger as well (it’s my second language) and overall the way I write Armin and Annie changed, I feel like I never really wrote Annie correctly until recently, I don’t think I understood her enough.

4-Fanfic authors can be harsh on themselves, espically with older works, share three things you like about your first fic.

So my first fic is called Blue, but on Ao3 it’s called Kiss, (don’t ask, I have no idea how that happened either)

I wrote it in 2019, and posted it during Armin week in January 2020

This is the first time I even look back at it during these three years, and honestly it’s so hard to read something I’ve written so long ago.

I like how excited I was about it, how excited I was to share a story I wrote with people, I like how I wrote it with excitement about these characters, and I like how I always had my own way of describing feelings, which I still do until this day.

You can find it here on AO3, and here on TUMBLR

13- Do you use symbolism when writing fics? Tell us about it!

OH YEAH I DO, I add so much symbolism and descriptions and everything, especially with Legends, I basically poured every symbolism I have into this one story

I just enjoy it, SO MUCH

#ask game #aruani #I enjoyed this uwu #thanks for the ask!

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fantasiawandering · 2 years

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Ten years today....

Ten years ago today, I hit post on the first chapter of Falling.

I wish I could be celebrating with an update, but brains are funny things, and I still haven’t recovered from the trauma of a few years back. Without getting into details, I learned that the brain can rewire itself to deal with trauma, and I’m pretty sure the road to surviving it ran straight through the place where the stories came from, and I haven’t figured out how to get them back.

Yet.

Because here’s the thing. As hard as some of the last ten years have been, hitting publish on that story has brought some of the best people I know into my life, and I am so much better for knowing them. So I continue to hold onto hope that someday the stories will come back.

And until that day, the old ones will still be there, and hopefully finding new people who need them, too.

Thanks for the journey, friends. May the road go ever on.

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animebw · 2 years

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One Piece: 1000 Chapters Reflection

A thousand chapters is a lot. It’s a lot of story, it’s a lot of content, and it’s a lot of real-time work that’s gone into it. It has been over two decades since One Piece started to reach this milestone. Really think about that: I just turned 24, which means One Piece at 1000 chapters is almost as old as I am. Are you the same person you were 24 years ago? I’m sure as fuck not. And neither, of course, is One Piece. Over those long years, it’s grown and changed in so many ways, a living document to its creators’ own evolution. For better or worse, the One Piece of today is not the One Piece that Oda started writing in 1997, as many similarities as they may share. And since it’s been about 400 chapters since my last big reflection on the series, I figure what better time to take stock of things again than such a grand milestone?

Post-timeskip One Piece has been... weird. I mean, One Piece has always been weird in a lot of ways, but the Paramount War and its fallout have changed this story’s trajectory in some pretty fundamental ways. Time was, the Straw Hats had chances to explore the smaller, weirder pockets of the Grand Line that existed just off the beaten path. Sidetracks like Skypiea, Long Ring Long Land, and Thriller Bark, while having their own connections to the grander story, could also comfortably exist as self-contained adventures in between the meatier plot stuff. That is no longer the case. From Fishman Island to Punk Hazard to Dressrosa to Zou to Whole Cake Island and all the way to Wano, the world of post-timeskip One Piece is a world where the overarching narrative has fully taken hold, and every adventure the Straw Hats take must be in service of it. And considering how drastically the Paramount War shook up the status quo, it makes a lot of sense. Who has time for sidetracks after Ace’s brutal death? Who has time for sightseeing now that we know just how badly this world needs to be turned on its head? Luffy and his friends are no longer merely travelers charting their own course; they’re actors on the stage of history itself. Their presence in the world is just too damn big now for them not to be at the center of attention.

And if nothing else, these past 400 chapters have indeed been big. The longest, most complex arcs with the most characters jockeying for focus, detailing staggeringly large battles against the most powerful forces active in the world. Even the shortest arcs are still packed with mind-blowing revelations about the nature of the world and the forces that have shaped it history. The shock and awe that was the Paramount War’s massive scale is now just par for the course. It’s awe-inspiring. It’s mind-blowing. It’s some of the coolest, most creative shit I’ve seen in long-form adventure stories.

It’s also more than a little exhausting.

Here’s the thing: when you’re stuck in the same mode for an extended period of time, no matter how well you pull it off, it’s going to start losing its potency. Shock and awe the first time is a spark of life; shock and awe repeated for almost a full decade of real time just becomes normal. One Piece has been in its post-timeskip Everything Is Massively Important stretch for almost as long as it hasn’ t been at this point. That is a long ass time to keep hammering the drums at full volume and expecting the audience to cheer just as loudly. As much as I want to match its energy, my voice is going hoarse, and I just want it to cool it on the heavy metal anthems and throw in a couple acoustic guitar love ballads to give me a chance to recover, if this extended metaphor makes sense. But no, every new arc is another intricately detailed location to learn the ins and outs of, another gargantuan cast of characters to care about, another explosion of critical plot information and dramatic story beats to keep track of. It’s so much information not just to keep track of, but to stay invested in. And if you start running out of steam at any point, you’re only gonna get further behind because there are no pockets of rest to catch up.

And listen, I know it’s a bit of a running joke at this point how bad I am at remembering story details. But really think about it. Think about how fucking huge this manga is now. Think of how many people, places, things, and events there are to keep track of on a regular basis, how there is only ever more added to the pile. Sure, it’s fine if you’re already a super-fan and enjoy dedicating your life to cataloguing every last detail Oda scrawls in the margins, but what if you’re not? At what point does One Piece become so complicated that only the most devoted fans are able to invest the time necessary to even follow that’s going on? I consider myself a pretty big fan, and yet even as I chew through it on a fairly consistent basis, there is still so damn much I can’t keep track of. Imagine if I didn’t have you guys as a personal encyclopedia I could turn to whenever I’m feeling lost. And now imagine the countless more casual One Piece readers who don’t have literally over a thousand followers to answer all their pressing questions at the drop of a hat. Not to constantly bring up the dreaded comparison, but there’s a reason Gintama spaced out all its huge, earth-shaking arcs with hours and hours of more character-focused downtime that furthered the story and themes in more subtle ways. It gave you time to decompress and truly internalize the importance of every last moment, only letting loose with the truly relentless fireworks for the final stretch. Honestly, I may remember more details about that show three years after watching it than I do with One Piece mere months into the past. Unfair comparison or not, that’s pretty telling.

Sure, I’m not gonna pretend it’s been all bad. The best of post-timeskip One Piece has been a truly incredible roller coaster ride of cool moments and shocking reveals. And if nothing else, the villains have been top-tier. Big Mom, Kaido, and especially Doflamingo are the best antagonists we’ve gotten yet, bad guys who cast huge shadows over everyone and everything caught in their wake. They’re titanic, impressive threads, but more importantly, they’re human in ways that make their monstrosity all the more compelling. Dofy and Charlotte’s portrayals as warped children who never got a chance to grow out of their worst impulses, the added complexity of Arlong’s hatred for humans... in a rogue’s gallery that’s too often fallen back on assholes just being assholes, the villains of recent One Piece have cast this world’s forces of evil in a much messier, much more compelling light. It’s one thing just to beat up dickheads because they’re dickheads; it’s something entirely different to recognize parts of yourself in the monsters you’re fighting. Especially when the ultimate goal is to overthrow the broken system those monsters are entwined in.

And yet. Every time I take a step back and look at what One Piece has become, I can’t help but think about the other One Piece. The One Piece that existed before all the different factions and leaders, all the alliances and betrayals and upsets, all the countries and legacies and histories, all the Warlords and Emperors and Navy Captains and Worst Generation Pirates, all the world-shaking events and earth-splitting battles, all the armies slamming against each other while their champions duke out one-on-one, the old masters, the new upstarts, the ordinary people caught in the crossfire, the details I remember, the details I’ve forgotten, the details I’ve yet to learn, the details I likely won’t remember, the dragons, the poison gasses, the living dolls, the mermaids, the ponegliffs, Laugh Tale, before even the Grand Line itself...

And I realize just how little of all that even holds a candle to this.

The One Piece I fell in love with wasn’t a gigantic, sprawling epic. It wasn’t a story about the Straw Hat Pirates reshaping the world with grand strokes of their pen. It was a story about, well, the Straw Hat Pirates. A story of lost, broken people finding their strength in each other, giving each other the courage to overcome the chains that bound them. A story of a small group of friends in a must larger world than we could ever imagine, coming together as the family none of them ever found in their lives before. THAT’S why this manga was able to so thoroughly sink its claws into me before we even technically finished the prologue. The adventure itself, and the prize that lay at the end of it, was never the point. The One Piece was never the point. The point was the people who came together to embark upon that adventure in the first place.

Yes, some incredible moments have resulted from One Piece’s jump to epic fantasy. It has accomplished some truly amazing things by going so big and staying so big. But when I find myself thinking back on the moments of this manga that truly linger with me? It’s never the big, earth-shattering revelations or the battles with hundreds of named characters.

It’s a silent gesture to a comrade saying goodbye, a promise that no matter how far apart they may grow, their bond will never be shattered.

It’s deciding to make the world itself your enemy if it means standing up for someone you care about.

It’s falling to your lowest point and realizing that when everything seems lost, there’s still one thing worth fighting for.

This is what One Piece is to me. This is what this manga is capable of at its best. This is why I cared enough to stick through a thousand goddamn chapters, just to see how this found family would make it out okay.

This is also what’s been almost entirely absent from modern One Piece’s relentless bombast.

And I miss it.

I miss it so fucking much.

I have not fallen out of love with One Piece. I probably never will fall out of live with One Piece, even if it somehow becomes terrible. At this point, I’m in too deep. And there is still plenty to love about the colossus it’s become. But the longer we’ve spent since the Paramount War, the more I’ve come to realize that my favorite version of this manga is gone, and it may never truly come back. And that’s a disappointment I’m not quite sure how to fully shake off. For all the great things it’s done and is still doing, I wish I lived in a world where it could do those things and still retain the emotional character focus that made its best moments so special. Sanji’s arc in Whole Cake Island came the closest, but the myriad problems with his character meant it could only go so far. And that kind of storytelling has become an outlier in Oda’s writing now. That just isn’t the kind of manga this is anymore.

One Piece is good. Often, it’s great. At times, it’s a powerhouse second to none. As long as Oda keeps writing it, I will keep enjoying it, flaws and all. I’ll enjoy the insanely deep lore and worldbuilding, the absurdly massive fights, the shockingly compelling villains, and the few moments of intimate characterization it still has every once in a while (while doing my best to ignore all the sexist moments). I’ll enjoy it all the way to Laugh Tale itself and the final revelation of what Roger’s treasure hoard has in store.

But as much as I’ll enjoy it... I know I’ll never stop missing when it could be this too.

I think that about wraps my thoughts up. Honestly, giving this whole thing a score feels pretty pointless, but I guess I’m at a... 7/10 right now? Something like that, at least. At any rate, I’ve got less than a hundred chapters to go, and it’s probably be just about a month until I’m fully caught up. Then I can suffer the weekly waits with all of you! Won’t that be fun?

Bon Voyage, friends. Until next time!

#anime #the anime binge-watcher #tabw #one piece #one piece manga #luffy #monkey d luffy #zoro #zoro roronoa #nami #usopp #sanji #tony tony chopper #chopper #nico robin #franky #brook #jimbei

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worldenough-and-time · 1 year

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I know it’s better to like “let my art speak for itself,” but I do want to say a few things about this next chapter of TTTB.

So, story time: I’ve been writing this fic while living in a red state that is in the process of passing a slew of horrendous anti-trans legislation. A little while ago when I was writing this chapter, I went to a state legislature committee hearing to speak against a bill that would ban gender affirming medical care for minors. Of course, the the Texas Leg are are a bunch of fucking cowards so they stacked the “invited testimony” block of the hearing with right wing nut jobs, and public testimony didn’t even begin until 9pm. For context- hundreds of people had driven in from all over the state to testify against this bill. Some had been there since 6 in the morning. Then the committee decided they were going to cut off the public testimony at midnight- which is highly unusual and was clearly a reaction to the obvious public opposition to the bill, which they were planning to pass no matter what anyone said. I never got to speak, and the vast majority of the people there never got to speak.

So like, fuck democracy, I guess.

Anyway, at around 9pm the public testimony starts. Since this was a bill that would affect kids, there were a lot of kids and families there. Again, these folks had been there since 6 in the morning, had missed school and work the whole day, and were finally getting to speak. And these kids were amazing. Ten, eleven, twelve year olds, hundreds of miles from home, exhausted, speaking to senators about their right to exist. Justifying their right to continue getting the care that their doctors and therapists and parents agreed was medically necessary. Literally begging these fucking ghouls to vote down this bill, or else they would likely have to move out of the state.

And a lot of the kids talked about when they first realized they were trans. And those stories usually had one thing in common- they had met another trans person, recognized their own experience, and were finally able to verbalize what they’d never had the language to say before.

And it struck me that this is exactly what all the bigots are trying to make impossible with these laws. They want to legislate trans kids out of existence, make it illegal to be trans in public, censor any mention of queer or trans folks in schools, ban gender nonconforming folks from any place kids might be, so that kids don’t have anyone to look to when they’re figuring out they’re queer and trying to see if it’s possible to be who they are safely and happily. Cause it’s so much harder to be open about who you are without seeing someone else do it first- without anyone to guide you.

And thats what this chapter is about.

Anyway, I’m not trans but I love people who are, and this fic is in a lot of ways a love letter to them, and to the queer community where I live. We’re not going anywhere.

Ah, that ended up being a lot longer than I thought. Without any further ado- here’s the chapter. I’ll make another post without this whole preamble, but yeah. Today and Always, Fuck the Texas Leg.

Chapter 9: Test Case

Sirius was nine years old the first time she ran away from home. She only managed to stay away one night before Kreacher came and dragged her back from Andromeda’s flat, but it didn’t matter. That one night changed her life.

“Shit, An, is that a kid?”

Sirius looked up from the stoop on which she sat. She’d dozed off slightly while waiting for Andromeda to get home. For some reason she had imagined that Andromeda would be there to greet her with open arms when she’d clutched the small key ring her cousin had given her last year, a portkey to her new flat. Just in case.

It hadn’t even been that bad at home when she’d left. Just a row with her mother, a few lashes on the top of her hands that Sirius thought she’d truly earned by the end the way she’d run her mouth. Maybe Andromeda would think she’d wasted it. Sirius had always been impulsive.

Now her cousin stood under a fluorescent streetlight flanked by Ted, whom Sirius knew, and several other friends, whom Sirius did not. All of them looked like they were getting home after a night out, dressed in leather and fishnets and eyeliner, even the blokes, and Sirius thought they were the coolest people she’d ever seen in her life.

“Sirius?” Andromeda asked, coming close enough to see her clearly. She was barefoot in silk pajamas, eyes blotchy, hair a mess, shivering from the cold. There was dark crusted blood on her hands and the hem of her shirtsleeve. She held the spent portkey with a shaking grip.

“Hey Andy.”

#i was gonna be vauge about where I live but then I gave up on that #I love you Texas queers ❤️#wolfstar #lesbian wolfstar #sapphic wolfstar #wolfstar fic #marauders

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bg-sparrow · 1 year

Note

for the fanfic writer ask - 6, 21, 28, 33, 44! :)

Yay, @daryfromthefuture gave me some more Fanfic Writer Asks! I have something to do before making a bill calendar today! Thank you!! 😁

6. If you had to delete one of your stories and never speak of it again, which would it be and why?

Mm, I'll stick to my AO3 account for this (because there are numerous at FFNet lol). I'm so proud of everything I've written because it was a necessary stepping stone to where I am today, but if there's one I'd delete off AO3 right now, it'd probably be Survival is Insufficient. The idea was really off-the-cuff and unplanned, and I think I could do better by reworking it into something different or larger in scale.

21. Tell me about another writer(s) who you admire? What is it about them that you admire?

Construction-wise, I really like Dan Brown (of the Robert Langdon series). I know he's divisive, but I love his utilization of short chapters to keep things fast-paced, and he's good at ending a chapter on a cliffhanger that makes me have to read the next chapter. I love that I don't find myself wondering, "when will this chapter end??" because of those two things. Ted Elliot and Terry Rossio are two screenwriters that I adore. I love their storytelling, and I didn't even realize they were responsible for some of my favorite films until ten years ago — Aladdin, Pirates of the Caribbean, National Treasure. I listened to their writers' commentary on the first Pirates movie right when I was getting serious about writing as a teenager, and their word became gospel (or, at least, guidelines 😉). And if Vince Gilligan and Taika Waititi could just SHARE some of their secrets with me, that'd be great.

28. What is something you wished you’d known before you started posting fanfiction?

It is thankless. It is SO thankless. I still struggle to remember that sometimes. Not everyone who reads is going to comment or kudos or bookmark, even if they're your biggest fan. You'll never know, and you just have to do it for yourself. Maybe you DO write something that takes your fandom by storm, and that's awesome! Stay humble. Let your work speak for itself. Don't say you suck at summaries, don't beg for reviews, don't say you won't update until you get X number of reviews… let your work be what compels readers to comment, kudos, and bookmark, not your panhandling and need for big stats. It doesn't work that way. If you're not enjoying it, you're doing it wrong.

33. What’s the biggest compliment you’ve gotten?

When you write for a well-loved, small, protected fandom like Back to the Future and introduce an OC, you're rocking the boat. And I knew I was, but I wanted to try it and see how successfully I could pull it off. To my surprise, the ultimate compliment has been given to me by many: my OC blended seamlessly into canon, stood on her own, and actually added to the story. "I forgot she wasn't in the films" was probably the biggest compliment I've ever received. That was the "I did it, and I've got to keep living up to the expectations" moment.

44. What is the last line you wrote?

The last line I wrote would have been in my notebook last night while making notes for Once Upon a Time in the East. And it was: "You should have stayed dead."

Thanks so much for indulging me! I had lots of fun answering these, so feel free to drop more numbers in my inbox if the mood strikes! 😎

#fanfic writer ask #answered asks #ask game

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exosmutfactory · 2 years

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I'm There 002

originally posted by exo-stentialism

Maybe—just maybe—saying yes to Baekhyun’s endearing confession 5 years ago was one of the best decisions you’ve ever made.

2022 Masterlist | Main Masterlist | Story Masterlist | Part 2✓

networks — @/superm-net @/bbh-net @/exowritersnet

word count — 2.6k

genre — r&b singer! baekhyun, boyfriend! baekhyun, lovers!au, romance, angst, smut (in part 2), and fluff

[ This chapter contains: angst, hurt&comfort, and smut 💞 ]

A/N: This smut scene never happened 😳😳 goodbye!

The voice of the woman you despise more than anything calls your name. You clench your jaw, typing up the last couple of sentences in your important email before spinning around in your office chair with a fake smile plastered on your face. “Veronica, what pleasure do I owe your visit today?”

You’ve greeted her with this question for the past year and a half. Not by your wants either. After she took up your supposedly “unwelcoming behavior” with HR, you have made a point to be as sickeningly polite as possible with her.

“I lost the reports.” Her grave words have an immediate impact on you.

It’s Monday morning, you are running low on sleep and high on adrenaline thanks to accompanying Baekhyun to another one of his shows last night, and here comes the worst news you could receive at the beginning of another week. Another hell week—because you know shit is about to hit the fan when the director hears about this.

You blink slowly, taking a deep breath. There will be hell to pay, and you aren’t in any shape to deal with it today. “Can you repeat that for me, please?”

“I lost them,” she examines her nails, leaning her hip against the wall of your cubicle. Must be nice to not have to worry about your boss turning red in the face and spewing insults at you. Just the thought of the screaming you will receive later has your blood pressure spiking. Your temples throb and you know it is only the first of many headaches that will hammer away at your head soon.

“We’re doing inventory this week.” You try not to panic, digging your nails into the leather of your seat with a vice-like grip. “Have you tried asking IT about it? Maybe you can restore-”

“They are gone.” She looks you dead in the eye, a smirk playing at her red-painted lips. “You can’t find them even if you wanted to.”

You set your jaw, straightening up in an instant. “I will contact IT just in case.” You swivel around in your chair, starting a group email with her, IT, and other coworkers while she walks away. The clicks of her high heels pound away at your head like the bad feeling forming in your gut.

Your work phone rings; you don’t need to see the number to know who it is. You pick it up with a shaky sigh, an encounter with your boss is evident.

💋💋💋

You step through the front door, accidentally slamming it behind you. The loud sound echoes across the silent apartment. You roll your eyes at the faint flashes of light in the hallway, tugging off your annoying heels. Your feet are killing you. You spent the rest of your first shift running up and down the stairs all over the factory. Taking an elevator was out of the question because “only executives” are allowed to use them.

The latch of your heel has a tear in it from you ripping them off, and the two-inch heel itself is breaking off of the rest of the shoe. Frustrated tears fill your eyes. Nothing is going right today. The moment your foot touches the cold wooden floor, it cramps up. You wince, having to lean onto the wall for support. The back of your foot is throbbing, you know a blister is forming there. If not, it will soon.

Yeah. This is so not your day, and you can’t wait for it to end.

You limp into the kitchen, going to get a cup of water to soothe your parched throat before you lose your mind, when your eyes fall on the sink instead. Filled to the brim with dirty dishes.

Your eye twitches when you hear Baekhyun shuffle into the room. “I guess you expect me to be your maid now.”

He stops dead in his tracks. “What?...”

You turn to him with a cruel smile. “I pay the bills, keep the lights on, buy the groceries,” you show off the room, noticing that the tap is dripping as well, “and you can’t even clean after yourself.” You scoff. “The bare fucking minimum.”

“I was going to-”

“When? When were you ‘going to’ Baekhyun?”

“I’ve been out all day!”

“Oh yeah?” You laugh bitterly. “Doing what? Securing a gig at some rundown bar for your little shows?”

Baekhyun turns red in the face. He lowers his head for a moment, puts his hands on his hips, and takes a deep breath. His jaw clenches, brown eyes flickering back up to meet yours. “Are you done?”

“No-”

“Since you must know.” He interrupts, fire burning bright in his brown eyes. “I was out looking for a better job. For you.”

His words snap you out of your rage mode at once. You freeze, watching him step closer.

“There’s a publishing house downtown that has a position worthy to have you.” He shuffles through his pockets, handing you a business card. “I was checking it out for you.”

Now as he stands fully under the bright kitchen lights, you notice his styled hair. Half of it ruined by him continuously running his hands through it, but the hair gel is still there. Your anger vanished completely, leaving you with a painful ache in your chest. You just went off on him because you had a horrible day, and he didn’t deserve that at all. You can’t believe he went out on the town for you after the amazing show he pulled off last night at an upscale club either.

Tears sting your eyes. You duck your head and rush past him to grab your shoes. Baekhyun is hot on heels while you struggle to pick up your broken shoes with your shaking hands. Big water drops land on the wooden floor, your salty tears roll down your trembling lips. You can’t break down. Not here. And he doesn’t make leaving easy for you.

You give up on your shoes entirely and head straight for the door, opening it only to jump back when Baekhyun beats you to it, slamming it closed. Your heart races in sync with the one pressed against your back. “Baekhyun…” you swallow, blinking back tears. “Let me go.”

“No.”

“Baekhyun-”

He wraps his arms around you. “Stop running from me,” he whispers, his breath stuttering in his chest. “Stop running away.”

“I-”

“Come back home.” He rests his forehead against the back of your neck, hugging you to his chest. “Come back to me.” His voice sounds more broken by the minute. “I miss you.”

You sob, trying to shake him off. He can’t see you—not like this. Not after you spent months holding everything together while everything was slowly killing you. Just the thought of going back to that place tomorrow has dread squeezing the life out of your heart.

“You know I’m always here for you, right?” he murmurs over your sniffles, holding you securely in his arms. “Whatever problem, worry, or trouble comes your way.” He presses a kiss to your teary cheek, the ends of his hair tickling your chin. “I’m there.” He nuzzles his face in your neck, hugging you tighter, his heart racing with yours. “Right here with you.” His lips brush over your heated skin. “I love you.”

You sniffle one last time, blinking a few times before turning around in his arms to look at him with your blurry eyes. He rests his forehead against yours, looking at you with his soft brown eyes. You cup his cheeks in your hands, relishing in the familiarity of his minty breath before he presses his lips to yours.

Your salty tears mix with the taste of him on your tongue, but you don’t care. You pull him closer, melting into his passionate kiss and cinnamon scent.

He walks you back to your bedroom, not breaking the kiss for a second. Stripping off your clothes along the way. Your coat lands on the floor, your shirt falls onto a lampshade, and your bra goes flying off to who knows where by the time you cross over the threshold.

Baekhyun backs you up against the nearest wall, pressing his body to yours. His bulge pressing against your stomach makes you gasp, tangling your fingers in his hair as he takes your breath away. He takes your face into his hands, kissing along your jaw and slowly down your neck. Swirling his tongue around a sensitive spot on your collarbone that sets your whole body on fire.

His hands caress your hips and waist while you tighten your grip on his hair as his lips travel lower. He slides his hands up your body to cup your breasts in his hands, leaning down to press a kiss over your beating heart racing in your chest. He licks his lips before gliding them over your chest, his soft lips and wet tongue don’t leave a single spot untouched. You’re panting by the time he reaches one of your perked nipples.

He smiles up at you, taking in your every pleasured expression with his warm eyes, sparkled with love, and darkened in want. The lower his lips go, the more your thighs clench together. He has to gently push them open by the time his mouth reaches your navel.

You breathe shakily when he kisses your wet mound, flickering his tongue against you. It makes you shiver, leaning back onto the wall while his warm hands tighten their grip on your hips. You tug on his hair after a few minutes. You love his mouth, but you want his body against yours.

Baekhyun stands up, stealing your breath with another kiss and taking you into his arms. He lifts you up, swallowing your gasp with his unrelenting kiss. He walks you over to the bed and lays you down on the satin sheets. You slip your hands under his shirt, helping him pull it off before he joins you. He chuckles at your hurry to remove his jeans, stripping himself bare and tangling his legs with yours in the sheets.

His hand interlocks with yours, lost amongst the pillows under you. You wrap your thighs around his waist, arching your back when he slides inside of you. Baekhyun smiles, tucking his head in your neck.

You could spend forever like this. Skin to skin. No space in between, and wild hearts racing in sync.

[ gif credit: same as above ]

You clock into work a minute before 7:00 am the next morning, taking a swig of your coffee. You make your way to your cubicle, ignoring the burning stares and weird atmosphere in the room. Whatever has everyone up in arms and buzzing with conflicting energy today, you don’t care. You had enough drama yesterday to last you 2 years.

Sighing softly, you plop yourself down in your leather chair, rolling it closer to your desk. The moment you log into the company desktop computer, your work phone rings. You clear your throat, hoping your lingering drowsiness won’t make itself known. “Hello?”

“Come to my office.”

The call disconnects before you can even say a word.

A bad feeling forms in your gut as you put the phone back down. This isn’t good news. You gulp down your nerves, clenching your sweaty palms. Whatever is going on, you can’t freak out here. You’ve cried enough this week and don’t plan on doing it again anytime soon.

Steeling your emotions, you push yourself out of the false safety of your cubicle, slowly making your way down the long, executive hallway. You knock on the director’s door and smooth down the fabric of your pencil skirt while waiting to be allowed entry. When he tells you to come in, you take a deep breath and open the door. Your stomach drops to the floor when you find Veronica and two other workers in the room. You have a feeling that you know what you are here for.

Veronica’s smirk widens the further you walk into the room. You do your best to ignore her haughty sneer and focus on your boss instead, “you called for me, sir?”

He grunts, checking his watch. “Have a seat.”

You slowly sit down in one of the chairs in front of his desk, growing weary at all the cold stares focused on you. Your eyes snap over to your boss when he calls your name in a patronizing tone.

“It has come to my attention that the inventory reports,” his beady eyes zero in on yours, “were deleted by you.”

What? Your mind draws a blank, these four walls seeming to zoom in around you. “Sir?” Sweat breaks out on your back as you watch him cross his arms and lean back in his chair.

“Veronica here has informed me of the incident.” His eyes flicker to the smut woman resting her hand on his shoulder before shifting back to you. “You yelled at her when she came to you for help and deleted all the reports.”

Your feathers bristle. Your jaw clenches shut as your hands shake and blood boils. That is not what happened at all, and now, the other two men in the room are smirking at you too. You take a deep breath to compose yourself before speaking again. “That is not what happened, sir,” you start in your calmest of tones. “Veronica informed me that she lost the reports-”

“And no one else witnessed this?” he raises a brow, turning to the raven in the room. “Did you hear this, Sunghoo?”

“Nope,” he pops the ‘p’ obnoxiously, smiling evilly at you.

“I sent a group email,” you shake your head, eyes wide in panic. Why would Sunghoo lie? He works in the cubicle next to you! He’s always eavesdropping on what you do. “I contacted IT, Sunghoo, and Hyunwoo.” You have no idea why the guy literally in charge of counting each product isn’t in this room with all of you.

Your boss hums, turning to the last man in the room. “Did you receive an email, Jihoon?”

Jihoon flicks dust off of his expensive three piece suit, dragging his sly eyes over to you. “I have received no such thing, sir.”

Your hands quiver in suppressed anger. Jihoon doesn’t even work in IT. He doesn’t work in your department at all. You turn back to your boss as he delivers his final words to you:

“You’re fired.”

You don’t cause a scene. You don’t go off or plead for another chance like they expect you to do. With a polite smile, you take off your work ID and set it on the desk, stand up, and walk out of the room without a word. Not a single tear drops from your eye until you make it through the building and down to your car in the underground parking lot.

When you manage to return home in one piece and wash the unfairness of the short day off of you, Baekhyun sits on the couch and welcomes you into his arms. You rub your cheek with the sleeve of one of his stolen shirts and curl up in his lap, shutting out the rest of the world.

Part 3 |

A/N: Screw everyone OC worked with (>.<) one more chapter to go~~ <3

#baekhyun smut #baekhyun scenario #baekhyun romance #baekhyun fanfic #baekhyun ff #baekhyun #baekhyun x you #exo smut #kpop smut #kpop romance #exo romance #I'm There

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gc-genshin · 3 years

Text

Chapter Four: Epiphany

Epiphany (n.): a sudden insight or understanding of something.

Pairing: Various x female reader

Summary: You get an idea of what's going on… sort of.

Warnings: Explicit language.

Word count: 12.7k (holy shit my bad)

A/N: Uh… *taps mic* hello?? Is this book still relevant?? Did y'all miss me? Lmao, lot of shit happened the past months so I wasn't really able to focus on this story unfortunately. I hope this extra long chapter makes up for the wait! Plus this isn't proofread and I'll add the taglist later, I'm ready to post this chapter.

Happy reading!

Your first week of working at the Wangshu Inn was… uneventful, to say the least.

Other than being hectic trying to take care of guests because of Lantern Rite, nothing really surprising has happened. Which you suppose was a good thing.

After your little drinking incident that happened a few days ago…

—

“Perhaps…” Xiao started and you waited with a baited breath, nervous as to what he was going to say. “You are in need of some assistance, you imbecile.”

You looked at him with hazy and unfocused eyes. In your drunken stupor, you could only respond to him with an embarrassed laugh.

“Aha, yeah…” You trailed off awkwardly. Your eyes then began to droop dangerously low as a sudden wave of drowsiness had hit you. Xiao could only watch as you instantly passed out in his arms while letting out small snores. The adeptus let out an aggravated sigh as he picked up and carried you to your shared room, already regretting the decision of taking care of you.

—

It was safe to say you didn't see him for a day or two.

Today was Friday. One day before the Mingxiao Lantern was released. Goldet had decided to already pay you for your two weeks because of how hard you were working, which you tried to decline, but Goldet was as stubborn as you so you reluctantly accepted the money.

You were sweeping the reception area, bored out of your mind. You were done with all of your chores but you still wanted to work and be productive. You turn your head when you hear Goldet heave a sigh.

“Lantern Rite is nearly here, why don't we decorate the inn this year?” She asks you.

That line sounds familiar. You tilt your head, feigning confusion. “Lantern Rite? What's that?”

Goldet looks at you surprised. “Oh! Don't you know? On the first full moon of the first month each year, Liyue celebrates the Lantern Rite. It's a festival to commemorate the heroes from the past. After dark, the people release Xiao and Mingxiao Lanterns into the night sky.” She began explaining. “Ah... "May the flames of wisdom spread to all, and never be extinguished." This is the meaning of the lanterns. We believe they act as the beacons in the night, guiding bygone heroes back to their homeland.”

You gaze at her in wonder. “That sounds like a magnificent festival.” If I cried during the cutscene from the game, I wonder how much of a mess I would be if I was able to see it in person.

“Do you want to get involved in the Lantern Rite?” Goldet asks.

You nodded. “From the way you were talking about it, it sounds like a wonderful experience.”

Goldet clapped her hands excitedly. “That's great! The festive period leading up to the day itself is all part of the celebrations. If you're looking to take part, it's not too late.”

You thought for a moment. “Wait, so you're telling me that I don't have to work?” You asked Goldet.

She let out a small gasp as if she was shocked you would even suggest such a thing. “Oh Archons no! I would never ask you to work on a holiday such as Lantern Rite!” She exclaimed. You blink at her a few times, caught off guard by her slight outburst, and she laughed at your expression. “Haha... During this time, we pray to bring peace and ward off bad luck. Liyue locals call it "bidding farewell to the old and welcoming the new."

After hearing Goldet exclaim, Huai’an, her husband and the innkeeper, came to see what the commotion was. “Verr, are you alright? I heard you yell.” He asked with a concerned look.

Both you and Goldet turned to him. “I'm fine, dear. I was just explaining to [Name] the history behind Lantern Rite.” Goldet tells him. “Can you believe this will be her first time celebrating it?”

Huai’an gives you a look of surprise. “You've never experienced Lantern Rite?”

From the way they were talking about it, you almost felt embarrassed to say no. You hunch your shoulders and meekly shake your head at him.

Huai’an noticed your timid state. “Well isn't this exciting?” He quietly asked Goldet. He then turned to you. “Lantern Rite truly is a wonderful experience so I have no doubt that you'll enjoy it. Plus I can teach you how to make Xiao Lanterns!” He gives you an encouraging smile.

You give them both a wide eyed stare. “So… I'll be able to go to Lantern Rite? You don't need me for anything?”

Goldet shook her head while laughing. “No, you silly girl. Everybody will be in the city to release lanterns, so the inn won’t be very busy that night.” She gives you a soft smile. “Go and have fun.”

Shit I might just cry. You looked at Goldet teary eyed. “Boss!” You wept comically. “You're too kind, boss! Paying me in advance, giving me a roof over my head, letting me go to Lanter Rite! What did I ever do to have such a wonderful boss?” You cried out and glomped her into a hug. You were totally using your younger appearance as an advantage to act more childish because you would have never done this with any other boss.

Goldet laughed at you, reciprocating the hug. “And what did I do to deserve such a wonderful employee? You've been working so hard since you've started, it would be cruel of me not to let you go and enjoy the festival.” She tells you while swaying side to side. You've come to realize that Goldet was starting to become like the older sister you never had.

You both pull away from the hug. “Plus,” Goldet began, “I paid you early in advance so that you would be able to go shopping.” She gives you a cheeky smirk. “Can't have you wearing my clothes and your uniform the entire time you're here.”

You laugh at that. “You're right.” You grin at her and Huai'an. “Thank you both so much, for all that you've done for me.” You say sincerely.

“Of course [Name]. Now go have fun shopping.” She gestures to the balcony. “I think you've just about swept the floorboards down to splinters.”

You thank Goldet again and give her one last hug before running to your room to change. But as you were making your way up the stairs, Goldet called out to you. “Oh [Name]! Um… also,” she trailed off uncertainly.

You crinkle your eyebrows in confusion. “What's up?”

“If you're able to…” she cleared her throat. “... could you... try to convince Xiao to go with you?” She asked. She then let out a sigh. “We're not close, I wouldn't know how to ask him myself. But it seems that you've grown familiar with him.”

You look at her confused. You? Being close with Xiao? Yeah, the thought sounds nice but there's no way you have already ‘grown familiar’ with him in just a week. If anything he tolerates you at best since you've forcefully wormed your way into his life.

“Really?” You tilt your head. “Xiao doesn't seem to be one for crowds.” Sorry Aether, I might have to steal your idea. “I mean, I'll try and convince him but I can't make any promises.”

Goldet let out a resigned sigh. “I suppose you're right… Anyway! Just thought I'd mention it. You should get yourselves down to the harbor.”

She then shoos you off with a smile. “Get going! If you leave too late, the city will be crowded with people and you won't be able to make the most of it.”

You nod enthusiastically. “Yes ma’am! Happy Lantern Rite!” You wave to her and Huai'an.

They both wave back. “Happy Lantern Rite!”

—

You burst into your room, practically vibrating in excitement at the thought of having your own clothes. You hurriedly started to strip out of your uniform, unaware of the curious gaze that came from your current roommate.

Xiao was currently leaning against the railing on the balcony that accompanied the room and was wondering why you were in such a rush. As he turned to question you, he instantly turned back around upon seeing you reach behind yourself to start buttoning your dress, keeping his gaze on the scenery before him. Xiao let out a deep breath and rubbed his forehead in aggitaion. I just can't get used to her doing that.

However, when you start to undress, you notice Xiao quickly turn around out of the corner of your eyes. Halting your movements, you call out to the young adeptus as you buttoned your uniform back up. “Sorry Xiao! I didn't know you were there!” And you made your way to the bathroom.

Hearing you say his name made Xiao tense up in surprise and furrow his eyebrows. He was one hundred percent certain that you would have just kept undressing in the middle of the room, being the shameless mortal that you are, but you didn't. You instead moved to change in a different room. Huh… perhaps she does have some decency.

You quickly came out of the bathroom after that interaction, dressed in Goldet’s clothes for the last time. Seeing Xiao still out on the balcony, you walk up to his side while enjoying the warm breeze.

Xiao looked at you from the corner of his eyes, nearly seeing the excitement radiate off you. “Where are you going in such a rush?” He asked. You perk up when hearing his voice and swivel your head to him.

“Goldet is letting me go experience the festival!” You exclaimed excitedly. “Isn't that great?”

Xiao rolled his eyes and let out a scoff. “What's so great about releasing glowing trash into the sky only for it to return to the sea?”

You hummed. “Well, it's like any other tradition I suppose. It's not so much the actual festival or ritual that matters but more of the meaning behind it instead.” You shrug. “Plus it gives me an excuse to go shopping, you coming with?”

“No.”

You let out a groan and roll your eyes. Even though you were expecting it, you couldn't help but feel a little disheartened at his answer. “Why not?” You question. Although I already know why.

Xiao gave you a look. “I don't enjoy large crowds of people.”

You let out a sigh. “Fiiiiine,” you drawl out, “no means no so I guess I'll stop bothering you about it.”

Xiao raised an eyebrow. Really? She's going to quit just like that? He looked at you dubiously.

“For now.” You added mischievously with a smirk.

There it is. Xiao should have known better. He found out that you were too damn stubborn to give up easily pretty quickly. He shook his head at you. “Do you plan on leaving soon?” He changed the subject.

You nod. “I was going to leave as soon as I changed but then I saw you and just had to talk to you.”

That made Xiao scrunch his eyebrows. “You just had to talk to me? Why's that?”

You look towards him and give him a closed eyes smile. “Because I wanted too! Plus you're my friend and I enjoy your company.”

Xiao gave you a once over. A heavy feeling settled in his chest when you referred to him as a “friend”. That word left a bitter taste in his mouth. Everyone that he ever considered a friend had either died or left him in some way, and he never bothered to keep in contact with the current adepti, so the thought of you wanting to be in his company was worrying. Who knows how long it'll be until his karmic debt finally catches up to him…

And drags you along with him.

Xiao narrowed his eyes at you. You immediately took notice of his tense state and swallowed at the harsh glare he gave you. Uh oh. You let out an uncomfortable laugh. I don't think he liked that.

“What have I told you about getting close?” He asked harshly which caused you to curl in on yourself slightly.

“In the thousands of years that have passed, I have taken countless wraiths,” he began, “so if you want no trouble, it’s best you keep your distance from me.” After he finished scolding you he turned to leave, going to do who knows what. You watched as he seemingly stormed away. Slightly panicking that he was leaving because you had upset him, you steeled your nerves and asked the first thing that came to your head.

“But what if I want trouble?”

Your question made Xiao stop in his tracks. He turned to look at you confused. You wore an expression that was full of confidence that waived slightly.

“What if I don’t want to keep my distance away from you?” You continued. “You told me to “stay out of your way or all that awaits me is regret”, right?” You quickly stride over to him and jab a finger in his chest.

“Well guess what honey? That's a risk I'm willing to take.” You tell him fiercely. “I make my own choices and if I happen to make bad choices then I will deal with the consequences of those choices.” You place a hand on your chest and glare at him determinedly.

“You have no say in what I ultimately can and can't do, Xiao. Only. I. do.” You finally finish and place your hands on your hips defiantly.

Xiao looked at you blankly, trying to process what you had just said. When he finally did, he looked at you sternly. “Is that really what you want?”

“More than anything.” Your eyes bore deep into him, not wavering in the slightest in your decision. “You saved my life. The least I can do for you is offer you my company and assistance in any way for not letting me splatter all over the ground. Even if you don't want it.”

After a few heartbeats of silence, Xiao reluctantly gave in and sighed while crossing his arms. “You are the most troublesome human I've had the displeasure of knowing.”

You smiled triumphantly. “Glad we're on the same page!”

“Well I'll be heading off now. Do you need anything?” You ask as you start heading towards the door.

“Nothing in the city would be of use to an adeptus.” He responds. “Don't forget your blade.”

You promptly made a 180 turn and walked towards your nightstand where a little dagger laid. Since you weren't able to fully wield a bigger weapon and don't understand how they do the whole whooshy thing to make their weapons disappear, I think he called it “particulation” or something like that, Xiao insisted that you had some form of weapon to protect yourself with.

You grabbed the knife and clipped it parallel to your belt, allowing your shirt to conceal it. “I don't see the reason as to why I have to have this thing. Aren't the Millelith scattered along the road to Liyue?” You then turn to Xiao and tilt your head. “Plus I can just call you whenever I'm in trouble.” Though that would probably be a last resort for me.

“I don't trust those lousy soldiers.” Xiao huffed.

You raised your eyebrow and pursed your lips, nodding in agreement. “Yeah… I don't blame ya.”

“Anyways,” you shrug, “are you sure you don't want to come with me?”

Xiao only shook his head. “Best you go alone. There's no need for me to be there.”

You look at him with big doe eyes, trying to convince him to at least walk you to the harbor. “But the road from here to Liyue Harbor is long and full of dangers... I need someone to ensure my safety!” You exclaim, seemingly scared.

“That's why I gave you your blade.” The adeptus gave you a bored look upon his handsome face.

You then startled Xiao when you clapped your hands into a prayer position and brought them to your head. “O Vigilant Yaksha, please escort me safely to the city!” You cry out.

Xiao tensed at your sudden decloration. Normally, Xiao was used to other’s praying to him and hearing their wishes but when you did it, it made him feel… fidgety. You seemed to hold yourself in a high regard that you didn't let anyone have control over your actions, so it was odd to see you with your head bowed to him.

Xiao crossed his arms and looked away from you. “Quit that. There's no need for you to bow to me.”

You perked up, an excited gleam in your eyes. “So you'll come with me?”

“So be it. I won't be going into the city though.” He retorted.

You throw him a smile. “That's fine!” You straighten back up and open the door. “Come on, let's go!” You wave at him.

Xiao shook his head at your antics and began to follow you. And to think that she's a grown adult. “Wait.” He called out.

You stop in your tracks and look back at Xiao confused. “Huh? Why?”

Xiao walks up to your left side and grabs your bicep. You looked at him even more perplexed. What is he doing?

You then began to feel a strong gust of wind swirl around you and in an instant, darkness flooded your vision and a familiar feeling of nausea came over you. When you opened your eyes again, you saw the gates of Liyue below the hill you were on.

You put your hands on your knees, trying to keep from puking everywhere, as you begin to process that Xiao had just teleported you both to Liyue.

“Here we are.” Xiao released your arm.

“Would have been nice to know beforehand.” You groan. After feeling like you weren't going to empty your guts out, you look up and let out a small gasp.

In front of you stood an archway that led to the bridge that entered into the city. Looking beyond that, you could see the beautiful Chinese architecture of the buildings that filled Liyue Harbor with the magnificent decorations of Lantern Rite along the city. You gaped at the scene before you. Holy shit…

Xiao swiveled his head to give a hard stare. “Don't go and cause any trouble.” He warned you.

That caused you to let out a snort. “Yeah, yeah, sure. What are you, my dad?” You raised an eyebrow at him. “Why did we teleport?”

“So I wouldn't have to listen to talk my ear off all day.” He responded bluntly, causing you to let out an offended gasp. “And I told you,” he continued before you could tell him off. “so long as you are in Liyue, it is my duty to protect you and not let any harm come to you.” Xiao reiterated.

“Wow… you really are my dad. But that's a pretty big responsibility. You sure you can follow through with it?” You question.

“Are you questioning my abilities as an adeptus?” He asked gruffly. He then leaned in closer to your face. “I always take care of my duties.” Xiao finished while staring you straight in the eyes.

Your eyes widened in surprise at his declaration. The way he said that so firmly and confidently made your chest feel light before tightening, a familiar feeling of guilt settling in, causing you to look away and frown. Shit… not now.

Noticing the change in your demeanor, Xiao tilted his head confused. “What's wrong?”

Shaking your head to get rid of the self-deprecating thoughts that were forming, you look up at him with reassuring eyes. “It's nothing.” You tell him with a small smile.

Going back to your seemingly old self, you give Xiao a look. “Alrighty,” You turn towards him and hold out your pinkie, “pinky promise it then.”

He gave your pinky an inquisitive look. You furrow your eyebrows in confusion. “You have heard of a pinky promise before, right?”

Xiao squinted his eyes at you. “Is this another strange human gesture?”

“Eh, I wouldn't necessarily say it's strange. More endearing than anything.” You hold your dominant hand and make a “give it” gesture. “Give me your hand.”

Xiao hesitantly puts his hand in yours. You close it into a fist, only leaving out his pinky. You then bring your own pinky and lock it with his own. “Now say your promise again.” Xiao looked at you reluctantly. You let out a groan. “Come on dude, just do it please?” You say giving him your best puppy dog eyes.

Xiao sighed. “I promise, so long as you are in Liyue, that I will protect you and not let any harm come to you.” He looked at your still entwined pinkies. As he said this, a gentle breeze drifted between the two of as if it was sealing the promise between you and Xiao. Xiao watched as the wind suddenly made your hair flutter around you and the way the afternoon sun casted just the right amount of shadows on your features as you looked up at him. At the moment he didn't see the fifteen year old features that made up your current face but the mature, more sharper features that he saw from your most recent pictures and student ID.

“Now what?” Her hands are really warm.

You give him a smile. “That's it!” You then let go of his pinky, bringing your hand back to your side.

He looked at you confused. “That's it? Nothing special happens?”

“The special thing about pinky promises is that the person who broke the promise gets their pinky cut off by the other person who made the promise.” You say to him.

“That's quite gruesome for such a little act.” Humans confused him so much.

“I think it was more of a scare tactic for kiddos than anything really.” You shrug. You then started walking to the city. “I'll see you later Xiao!” You call out with a grin.

“Be careful.” He told you with a subtle nod, which made your smile somehow even brighter, before teleporting away. You then turned back around and practically skipped to Liyue.

—

You made your way down the hill and soon came upon the gate that led to the city. In front of it stood two guards, you couldn't bother to remember their names, who gave you a nice ‘welcome to Liyue Harbor’ as you walked past them. As you walked over the bridge you saw the Mingxiao Lantern standing tall in all its glory. Continuing on, you finally stepped foot in the city. With a look of amazement on your face, you spun around while trying to take in all of the decorations.

I can't believe I'm actually here… You let out a disbelieving laugh and began to feel your eyes become misty. Am I really tearing up right now? Oh my God I am. You shake your head trying to get your emotions in check. As you carry on walking further, the infamous somewhat creepy shipowner, Bolai spots you looking around like a lost puppy. Which you really weren't, you were just hypnotized by the decorations.

“Hello young lady!” He called out to you. You whipped your head towards him, slightly startled. When you realized who was talking, you made a small grimace. Oh… it's that really creepy guy that I don't like.

As he makes his way towards you, you put your guard up as you straighten your back. “Hello.”

Bolai raised an eyebrow as he stopped short of you. “What a strange accent. Are you perhaps foreign?” He questioned.

You furrow your eyebrows. I have an accent? “Something like that.” You reply with a shrug your shoulders nonchalantly and a ghost of a smile on your face. Ain't no way in hell are you talking about yourself to him.

Bolai narrowed his eyes at you suspiciously. How interesting. “Quite the mysterious one, you are. Tell me, young lady, where do you hail from? Fontaine? Sumeru?”

“Sure.” You tell him halfheartedly. Why the fuck is he grilling me so hard? I should probably give him some sort of answer so he'll leave me alone. “I traveled a lot so I never really had a distinctive place to call home.” You smoothly lied. Well… it wasn't entirely a lie.

Believing your little fib, Bolai’s face softens into a look of realization. A young girl like you didn't have a home growing up? Is that what you were hinting at?

Taking notice of the subtle pity look that crossed his gaze, you groan internally. Great, now he's going to think that I never had a home. Whoops!

“Well just know that you are always welcomed here in Liyue,” He reassured you, kinda. Your eyebrows raise slightly in surprise from that. “And if you ever need anything, and I mean anything, you can always come to me.” He finished ominously while giving you a smile that seemed a little too kind.

You leaned your torso away from the strange man and looked at him mildly creeped out, yet kept a polite smile on your face. “Duly noted… thanks.” Trailing off, you maneuvered your way around and sped walked away from Bolai. A fake shiver runs through your body. Ugh… just as creepy as I remember.

You continued further into the city. Your head was constantly moving from left to right, up and down, taking in the gorgeous decorations that littered the buildings and streets. Pulling out the Mora pouch that Goldet gave you, you recounted the money that you earned from your first week working. 60,500 Mora… that should be plenty right? You paused. Actually, isn't that a lot of money? This seems like a lot for just a week of work. After pondering a few moments, you shrug the thought off.

You made sure to visit almost all the food stalls that were on the harbor to experience Liyue’s cuisine authentically, as well as how to make Xiao lanterns. After doing all the activities you possibly could, you made your way up the gigantic steps that led to the main road of the city.

As you made it to the top, you put your hands on your knees trying to catch your breath. From being on your feet all day from working plus the training the Xiao puts you through, it's safe to say you were pretty damn tired. You're kidding me. I can not be this out of shape! You thought.

Heaving one last breath, you straighten back up. You looked out to see the streets bustling with people with a slight grimace on your face at the crowds of people. You absolutely hated crowds of people because being around them just completely drains your energy.

However, your curiosity and astonishment motivated you to move forward. As you walked through the city, you kept an eye out for any clothing shops because you needed your own clothes, since that's pretty much what you came here for.

Letting your gaze continue to search through the windows of various different shops, your eyes landed on an article of clothing that caught your attention. You quickly make your way to the store and opened the doors, causing a bell above the door to let out a little chime and alert the store owner and other shoppers of your presence.

“Welcome!” They called out. You give them a small wave in response as you make your way over to the outfit. Once you made it, you reached your hand out to feel the smooth silk of the fabric. It was a beautiful sleeveless, purple dress that reached the middle of your thighs. Around the skirt of the dress laid two longer pieces that were a darker purple and draped along the sides. The top of the dress was two different colors, the right being a dark purple that were the same color of the longer pieces while the left was a lighter purple that matched the skirt, and had a high collar and with an opening in the chest area. The dress also adorned what looked like a wide obi belt, but you weren't too sure. The whole dress was trimmed with gold accents and had gold swirls all along it. Next to the dress were a pair of low ankle boots that matched the color theme.

This was the one.

You yoink it off the rack and look around for the owner. When you found them, you asked if they had any dressing rooms to try on the dress to which they led you to one. You begin to strip as soon as the door closes behind you. I really hope it fits otherwise I'll be heart broken.

As you slipped the dress over your head you zipped up the side and fastened the button on the collar. When you turn around to face the mirror, your eyes widen in surprise. Holy shit… I've never had a dress fit me so well. The dress sat magnificently on you and accentuated your curves. However… You looked down at your chest to see that your bra from your universe was most definitely visible thanks to the opening that went from the collar of the dress to the belt. I'm gonna have to do something about that. Looking back in the mirror you took notice of your tattoos. Those as well. You thought for a moment. Plus I don't particularly like wearing dresses unless I have leggings or something underneath it.

You begin to take the dress off and put your other clothes back on. I wonder if they would have some kind of body suit or something… You put the dress back on the hanger but continue to hold on to it. Making your way back towards the racks of clothing you begin your search.

As you walk through the aisles of clothing, you notice a black full body suit hanging on one of the racks. Bingo! You thought with a smile. You made your way to the suit, but you failed to notice the other body that was backing up into you.

Feeling a sudden weight on your right side, you stumble a little due to the force. However, the person that ran into had lost their balance and started to fall to the ground. Eyes widening in surprise, you were quick to catch them by grabbing them under their arms. When you looked down to check on the person to see if they were okay, you felt your breath hitch.

Staring back at you startled are lavender colored eyes that were lined with dark, thick lashes that belong to the one and only Ganyu.

You begin to feel your cheeks grow warm as you look down at the gorgeous half-adeptus in your arms. Ohfuckohfuckohfu– “Are you okay?” You asked worriedly. When you looked up to see what could have caused her to trip, you were greeted with the sight of a man that looked a little too pleased with himself. As he looked away from Ganyu and up to you, you made sure to give him the coldest glare you could manage – which made the man’s smirk falter and back up just a little.

Fucker.

Ganyu blinked as she came back to her senses. “Y-yes! I'm alright.” She gives you an appreciative smile. “Thank you.”

You return her smile. “It's no problem.” As you help her upright, you lean closer to her ear. “Do you know this guy?” You whispered. She looks at you from the corner of her eye and subtly shakes her head no.

You looked up to the creep and gave him an ‘innocent’ smile. “Is everything alright here?”

Realizing the slight hostile undertone in your voice, the man gives you a strained look. “Y-yes, everything's fine!” He stuttered and gestured to Ganyu. “I just thought I'd give this young lady a little help.”

Your eyes flicker from her back to the man. “She looks to be just fine on her own. What does she need help with?”

The man’s opens then closes, trying to think of a good excuse. “I… uh… well, she-!” You cut the man off with a raised hand.

“I'm going to stop you there. You're making yourself look like a fool.” You chastise. “It's obvious what you're doing and you're clearly making her uncomfortable. I suggest you stop now before you keep digging your grave even deeper.”

Eyes blown open and mouth agape, the man stares at you in shock from your words. Was I really that obvious? The man thought. He felt himself cowering in on himself under the heavy gaze of the two girls.

“Well, whatever.” He scoffed while avoiding eye contact, seemingly trying to act tough. “It's not like she was actually attractive.” Yet he received no reaction from either of the girls, as they continued to stare. The man began to fidget from their silence, then quickly turned around and left the store.

Both you and Ganyu let out a sigh. “Thankfully, that's over.” You tilt your head at Ganyu. “Does that happen often?”

“No, that was the first time it has ever happened.” She reveals. She then bows toward you. “Thank you for helping me.” When Ganyu straightens back up, she places a hand on her chest while giving you a sweet smile. “My name is Ganyu, secretary of the Yuhai Pavilion.”

God, she's even more gorgeous in real life… You flush a little as you give her a small bow in return. “It's nice to meet you, Miss Ganyu. I'm [Name] [Last Name].”

“It's a pleasure to meet you as well, Miss [Last Name]. Again, I do apologize for bumping into you earlier.” She tells you.

You wave your hand dismissively. “Just call me [Name], please. Calling me by my last name makes me feel old.” You joke.

Ganyu tilts her head curiously at you. “If I may ask, how old are you?” She asks innocently.

You pause, processing her question. Damn it. “I'm fifteen.” You manage out. I really hate telling people that because then they'll treat me like a child…

“Really?” She wonders aloud. “You're quite mature for your age and you seemed to know exactly what to do in the situation that happened earlier…” She trailed off.

You freeze hearing that. Oh shit! Has she caught on already?! You let out an awkward laugh. “Yeah, mature…” You say while making a subtle face. Although Xiao would disagree otherwise.

“Anyways, thank you once again for helping me. Is there anything I can do for you in return?” Ganyu asks.

You bring a finger to your chin and hum in thought. “Actually there is.” While Ganyu waits patiently for your request, you give her a smile. “Would you know of any stores that would have a body suit?”

The beautiful half-adeptus perks up in response. “As a matter of fact, this store has the same ones that I wear. Let me show you.” She then beckons you to follow her.

You do so with a skip in your step.

—

You and Ganyu soon left the shop, with you now wearing your new outfit that screamed main character. Thankfully the body suit was able to cover all of your tattoos. As you continued through the city, making light conversations with Ganyu, you watched as two little boys, who looked to be around the age of ten, chased each other around the streets while laughing. You watched them with a small smile. While you didn't like kids, you didn't necessarily hate them either. Plus it was kind of your profession to be able to take care of them as well. But you definitely didn't want any kids. Well, right now at least.

You watched as they weaved through the legs of strangers, trying to avoid getting hit. However, as the one with light blue hair raised a hand out in order to tag the other little boy with darker blue hair and an asymmetrical cut, a man that wasn't paying attention to what was in front of him went to take a step and kneed the poor boy hard in the head. The pale blue haired boy went down in an instant.

You let out a snort and raised a hand to your mouth to hide that you were laughing. “That poor kid just ate shit.” You couldn't help but let out a few chuckles at the kids unfortunate situation. Ganyu looked at you confused from the corner of her eyes. I'm a horrible person.

“I'm so sorry, buddy! Are you okay?” The young man that hit the boy asked as he crouched down. He received no reply as the boy laid still. The man started to shake the boy, seemingly beginning to panic.

“Hey…” He called out once more. “Are you okay?” He shook the boy frantically. Still, he received no reply. “This isn't funny, kid. Wake up!”

You stopped laughing and straightened your posture as your ‘doctor mode’ kicked in. Now you were getting concerned. Thousands of scenarios ran through your mind as to why the kid wasn't getting up. Is he concussed? Is he faking it? What's going on?

The other little boy that was running away, turned around when he heard yelling. His orange eyes widened in fear. “Chongyun!” He cried out and began running back to his friend.

Realization dawned on you. Those kids were Xingqiu and Chongyun. Your feet moved before you even noticed it as you rushed towards Chongyun and the man. Ganyu jumped when you began running and raised a hand to stop you. “[Name], wait!” But you were too far away to hear her over the people walking around.

A crowd began to form around the two to see what was happening. This caused the young man to panic even more. He looked up to the crowd. “Is there a doctor here? Please, anyone!” He cried out desperately, yet no one made a move to help.

You shook your head at the crowd. I see that the Bystander Effect is still a thing here. Xingqiu made it to Chongyun before you did, then got to his knees as soon as he reached him and started tapping Chongyun on the shoulder. “Chongyun?” He asked. “Wake up ‘Yun!”

You finally made it to the crowd and started elbowing your way through. “Excuse me! I'm a doctor, please let me through!” You yell out to the pedestrians. They turned and looked at you skeptically. Your lip curled up into a sneer at the people's ignorance. I don't have time for this.

“I said MOVE!” You yell out startling them in the process and forcing them to move. “Thank you!” You say exasperatedly, not forgetting your manners apparently. You quickly made your way over to Chongyun and got to your knees behind his head, gently placing your hands on either of his cheeks in order to stabilize his neck, in case he had injured it. Xingqiu noticed you and looked at you with tears eyes, worried out of his mind for his friend.

You looked to the man who started this whole mess. “What's going on? What happened?” You asked hurriedly while you checked Chongyun’s pulse.

The man seemed to be in a daze as he answered. “This kid just came out of nowhere. I had accidentally hit him with my knee and now he's not waking up.” He explained shakily. “Then this other kid just now showed up.” He pointed to Xingqiu. He then looked at you confused. “Aren't you a little young to be a doctor?”

You look at the man and give him a glare. “I don't think that matters right now since I'm the only one who even bothered to step in and help the poor child.” You glared at the rest of the crowd when you finished which made them avoid eye contact with you. Murmurs started to float through the crowd. What was this girl doing? Who is she? She's clearly too young to be a doctor.

You ignore their not so quiet whispering and look over to Xingqiu, giving him a reassuring smile. “Hey buddy,” you started softly. “What's your name?”

The normally composed boy let out a sniffle. “Xingqiu.” He responded. “My friend, Chongyun, isn't opening his eyes! Can you help?” He asked pleadingly.

“Don't worry baby, I'm a doctor.” You tell him, the pet name subconsciously slipping out of habit from when you worked with kids. “I'm going to help him and make sure he's okay.” Seventy beats per minute. Normal heart rate. Nineteen breaths per minute. Normal respiratory rate. If he wakes up soon, it'll most likely be just a slight concussion. You mentally start going down the checklist for head trauma patients when Chongyun finally opens his eyes.

Quickly taking notice, you yell at the crowd. “Everyone back up please! The kid is waking up so give him some space!” The crowd immediately backs away. You look back down at the boy who was wincing from the sunlight.

“Hey honey,” You gently try to get his attention, “can you hear me?”

Chongyun opened his eyes fully and looked at you, confused before squinting from the sunlight. From his position on the ground and the way the sunlight was hitting his baby blue eyes, you were able to see that his pupils were equal in size. Good. No anisocoria, no serious brain damage.

“Wha…?” Chongyun groaned out. With your hands on his cheeks, you gently tapped them to shift his attention back to you.

“Hey honey, look at me.” You instructed. “What's your name?”

The boy paused for a moment. “Chongyun.” He answered.

Alright that's one question. “It's nice to meet you Chongyun.” You smile at him. “Chongyun, do you know how old you are?” You continued.

“I'm ten.” He responded a little quicker this time. You nodded your head at him. That's two.

“Do you know where you're at, Chongyun?” You made sure to keep saying his name so that he would focus on you.

After a moment of silence, he responded. “I'm in Liyue.” He then closed his eyes and let out another groan. “My head hurts.”

“I know, dear. One last question, okay?” You tell him. He nods. “Do you know what happened to you?”

He thought for a moment. “I was… I was chasing Xingqiu,” said boy perked up in response to his name, “we were playing tag. I almost caught him then it suddenly got dark.” He opened his eyes and looked at you. “Why did it go dark?”

You give him a look of reassurance. “Your noggin got hit pretty hard and you fell down. You were asleep for a few minutes but you'll be okay.” You tilt your head. That's the last question. A and O times 4. He's alert and aware. “Does your head still hurt?” You asked as you began to palpate his neck, feeling for any serious injuries. You removed your hands when you found none.

He nodded. “Do you feel pain anywhere else? How about your neck?” He shakes his head in response.

“Good. Do you feel like sitting up for me sweetie?” You ask. Chongyun slowly moves to sit upright with your help and you guide him to the curb to sit on so he was out of the road. Xingqiu crawled over to his friend to see how he was doing, with you reminding him to overwhelm Chongyun. As you look out towards the crowd, you see Ganyu, who was carrying a cup of what you assumed was water, make her way over to your little group. She hands you the cup, which you thank her profusely, and you give it to Chongyun.

“Drink it slowly.” You advise him. “I don't want you choking on me now that you're awake.” You tease gently while sending a subtle wink to Xingqiu, causing the young boy to giggle.

He gingerly takes the cup from your hand. “Thank you ma’am.”

“Thank you, ma’am!” Xingqiu tells you as well.

“It's not a problem.” You reassure both of them with a smile. As soon as they saw that Chongyun was okay, the crowd dispersed and continued what they were doing. However, not without whispering amongst themselves how seemingly a teenager knew exactly what to do when taking care of an injured child.

You continued to sit with the two boys to monitor Chongyun, in case something suddenly went awry. Ganyu stayed as well, astounded at the young girl before her.

“What you did was quite impressive Miss [Name]!” The half adeptus praised. “I didn't know you were so vast in medical knowledge, and at such a young age too.”

You let out a few chuckles. “Well you only just met me today Miss Ganyu.”

She then gives you a sheepish look. “I was surprised to see you help him so quickly,” she leans in closer to whisper to you, “given that you were laughing at him earlier.”

“Oh… yeah,” You let out an uncomfortable laugh. “As long as they're not seriously hurt or in any danger, kids getting hit or falling is hilarious to me.” You let out a wince. “Wow, that sounds awful.”

“Yet you didn't hesitate to help him as soon as you saw that something was wrong.” Ganyu pointed out.

You lifted your hand to pet Chongyun on the head. “Well I've always wanted to be able to put my life to good use and help people in some way, so what better way than this? Helping people in their times of need.” You give Ganyu a cheeky smirk. “I may act all tough but I'm actually a big softie.”

“I'm well aware of that now.” Ganyu chuckles.

As you visited with the half-adeptus and two young boys, you failed to notice a pair of red eyes gazing at you with a look of mischief.

—

After triple checking that Chongyun was okay and him constantly telling you that he was, you wave the boys goodbye who returned it in full. Ganyu then tells you that she should continue running errands for Lady Nigguang and you may or may not have freaked out a bit inside when you heard her name. Waving to the half adeptus as well, you continue to wander aimlessly through the city.

You soon found yourself at the Wanmin restaurant, chef Mao working swiftly in the kitchen. He soon brought out your order and after paying, you made your way to the south side wharf. As you make your way to the dock, you sit down on the edge and look out at the ocean before you while swinging your legs. You welcomed the smell of salt water and the ocean breeze that fluttered around you, yet it did nothing to quarrel your racing thoughts.

I can't believe I've already been in Teyvat for a week and still don't have a fucking clue as to how I got here in the first place. You slide your hands down your face and clasped them together in front of your mouth. And Xiao has been no help to me in that matter unfortunately. The guy still doesn't talk to me that much anyways. Plus training with him has been difficult as well. I've learned that he's a super strict teacher and I've only managed to construct only two Geo items with him this past week but that was only when I was extremely frustrated or upset, so I have no clue as to how I'm going to be able to properly control the element… or that ‘particulation’ thingy with the weapons as well.

You drop your head in your hands and let out a whine. This is all so confusing! I really wish someone or something just give me some fucking answers!

You then look up and run your hands through your hair. Turning your head to the left, you see the giant Mingxiao lantern that was ready to be released once it was dark enough. You let out a sigh and try to relax. I should probably start looking for a place to watch it when it releases tomorrow. You stand up and start walking back to Feiyan Slope. Soon you crossed over the little bridge that connects Chihu Rock and Feiyan Slope. You decided to stick closer to the buildings to try and stay away from the crowds.

However, as you were too preoccupied to not hit anybody, you didn't notice a hand reaching out from an alleyway until it was too late. You felt a harsh tug on your left arm which caused you to let out a yelp. You quickly caught your bearings and when you turned to slapped your assailant, you froze as you saw a pale face that looked to be thirteen years old inches from yours. Red eyes with strange, floral shaped pupils came with the face and was framed with dark hair that faded into red.

Holy… Hu Tao? You wondered. But she looks a lot younger? Younger than this “me” that's for sure.

You give her a confused smile. “Um… hello?” Am I just going to meet every character in Liyue today?

“You're the one Mr. Zhongli told me about!” She exclaims. “It's nice to meet you! My name is Hu Tao!”

You swore you felt your soul leave your body when you heard his name. ZHONGLI?! HE’S LOOKING FOR ME?! OH SHI-! You're cut from your thoughts when Hu Tao starts pulling you. “Hey! W-wait!”

“C’mon! Mr. Zhongli is waiting for you back at the funeral parlor. It seemed like he wasn't too happy with you so we shouldn't keep him waiting any longer!” She giggles.

Yup, I'm officially dead. Maybe now I can go back to my world and be normal again.

Soon the young girl brings you to the doors of the Wangsheng Funeral Parlor. You gnawed on your lower lip. Fuck… I'm more nervous now than I was when I was taking the MCAT. Maybe because I'm meeting a FUCKING GOD?! You begin to slightly hyperventilate, the reality of the situation finally sitting in. FUCKFUCKFUCKFU-

You are once again snapped out of your internal freak out by Hu Tao pulling on your arm. The girl pushes the doors open while bringing you with her. The inside is about what you expected from a funeral parlor with coffins lining along the walls along with different types of shrines. After a few twists and turns, you and Hu Tao reach a very intricate door with a plate on it that says “Consultant: Zhongli”. You clench your jaw as you could practically feel the intense aura that radiated from him even through the door.

Without even knocking, Hu Tao busts through his door. “Mr. Zhongli! I found her! This is the girl you were looking for right?”

The wind gets knocked out of you upon finally seeing him in person and your knees about damn near buckle from underneath when you make eye contact with him. If you thought Xiao’s eyes were intense, then you don't even know how to describe Zhongli’s.

The Geo Archon narrowed his eyes towards you. “Indeed it is, Hu Tao.” His deep voice rumbled throughout the entire room and shook you to your core. “You may take your leave now.”

The young girl pouted. “Aw… and I wanted to see you scold her.”

A quick glance from the corner of his eyes was enough to make Hu Tao take the hint and leave, however not without whining on her way out.

As soon as Hu Tao was gone, Zhongli stood up and took large strides towards you, causing you to start panicking. Hu Tao, why did you have to leave me alone with an Archon?! Soon the man towered over you, forcing you to look up at him. The shadows that casted over his being due to him blocking out the overhead light made his striking amber eyes all the more intimidating. You felt like you were about to be pounced on like a mouse cornered by a barn cat.

Then Zhongli lowered his face closer to yours. “So you're the outlander who took my vision without permission.” He accuses. You feel your breath hitch in your throat and your palms beginning to clam up. You had never been more intimidated in your life and you have fought against people twice your size no problem before!

“Oh…! Um, t-that was me?” You stutter out. Your eyes widen when you realize just how fucking stupid you sounded.

Zhongli coolly looked at you. “Of course it was you. I knew that you were not of this world the moment you arrived in Liyue.” He tells you firmly while staring straight into your soul. “Now, do inform me on how you were able to acquire this power without a Vision granted from me?”

The silence was deafening in the room. You thought you were just about to faint until your experience from working under pressure in the emergency room decided to kick in and not fail you as you quickly composed yourself.

“In my defense,” you raise your hands. “it was completely out of my control.”

Zhongli raised an eyebrow, unconvinced.

You let out a sigh. “Here's what happened. A saw a Statue of Seven in Guili Plains, in all of its glory, and as soon as I was near it I felt a pulling sensation. Later that day I was extremely frustrated and all of a sudden a rock pillar just came out of the ground.”

Zhongli hummed in thought before finally standing back to his full height, allowing you to breathe again. He brought a hand to his chin and looked down in thought. “Interesting. I have not heard of such instances where that has ever happened, with me or any of the other Archons.” His eyes met yours again. “So what makes you special? So special that even the adeptus Xiao has decided to look after you?”

You couldn't help the exaggerated laugh that bubbled out of your throat. “Ha! I wish I knew, but your guess is as good as mine sweetheart.” You pause. “I also know that you're Morax too… if you haven't figured that out yet.” You finish meekly. WHAT THE FUCK AM I SAYING?!

The Geo Archon’s eyes widen at you. “How did you know that? Where exactly did you come from?” He interrogates.

You quickly explain to him the same thing that you told Xiao, that he was from a video game and that you were aware of what was to come in the future as well as how you somehow physically de-aged.

“Interesting.” Zhongli thought for a moment. “It appears that you come from a similar universe in which our’s exists but in a completely different manner.”

“How much of our universe do you know through this ''game”?” He questions.

“I know of some future events that will happen, but the lore of the story is still a complete mystery. We don't even know how long the main story of the game is.” You say.

Zhongli pondered. “I see. If you know what is to happen in the future, then it would be best to let things run their course and not intervene with it.”

“Yeah, the butterfly effect and shit like that.” Your eyebrows shoot up in surprise as you subconsciously swore. You quickly slap a hand over your mouth. “Sorry… it's a bad habit.” You apologize quietly.

Zhongli decided to ignore your mishap. “So you're aware of what could happen. And since you're already aware of my identity, I presume that you know that I go by Zhongli now?”

You nod your head. “Yes, I do.” You then realized that you haven't introduced yourself. You quickly bowed towards him. “My name is [Name] by the way! [Name] [Last Name].”

Zhongli nodded. “It's a pleasure to finally know the name of the outlander that took my Vision without consent.”

You make a face at his snarky comment. “Is it a pleasure though?” You muttered rhetorically.

“Let's continue with your situation.” Zhongli diverted the conversation back on track. He then looked towards you. “Perhaps if you tried to remember the events that happened to you before you came here, that may give us a better idea as to the reason why you're here.” He then gestures to one of the chairs in front of his desk. “Please have a seat. It will be easier for you to remember if you're comfortable.”

“I do remember being on a bridge but that's the only thing I know now.” Moving to sit down, you tuck your dress skirt underneath you and cross your legs, trying to look somewhat professional. You take a deep breath as you gather thoughts. What happened before coming here? What was I doing? You lean forward and rest your elbows on your knee while interlacing your hands, then put your forehead against them. You close your eyes and your eyebrow twitches into a furrow as you begin to concentrate. [e/c] eyes move rapidly behind eyelids as memories start to form.

“A hospital…” You began. “I was working a shift in the hospital.”

—

“Hi Miss Bradford!” You cheerily call out as you knock on the door. The old woman looked up from her magazine and smiled at you with dull blue eyes.

“Dr. [Last Name]. How are you doing sweetheart?” She asks softly. Miss Bradford was a quiet old lady in her seventies with salt and pepper hair and the brightest, most gorgeous blue eyes you had ever seen.

That was before she had started chemotherapy.

Miss Bradford was your most recent patient. You had treated her a few months ago when she came to your emergency room with intense chest pains. After taking multiple different CAT scans and MRIs, you and several other doctors had concluded her diagnosis as breast cancer. Although you admitted her to Oncology, she kept having complications when she had started chemotherapy; causing you to see her quite frequently.

Today was the day Miss Bradford would start her third round of chemo and you decided to bring her her favorite lunch before starting. Miss Bradford was hell bent on beating this cancer but after her most recent round she had started to lose her appetite. Which was never a good sign for a cancer patient.

“I'm doing well, thank you. And I thought I told you to call me [Name]?” You grab a chair and pull it up next to her bed.

She gives you a small smile. “But you worked so hard to earn the title of a doctor. I'm only giving you the respect you deserve.”

You shook your head playfully at the older woman. “How're you feeling today?”

She let out a sigh. “Tired, but better than yesterday. I'm ready to get this damn treatment over with.” She grumbled.

“That's good! Do you feel like eating today?” You ask.

She shook her head. “Not really but knowing you, you'll probably force me to eat anyways.” She looked at the plastic sack in your hand. “Whatcha got there?”

“Well hopefully this will bring your appetite back for today. It's your favorite!” You raise the bag higher and place it on her food tray. “Almond Tofu! I remember you telling me that it was your go to desert when you lived in Singapore, so I had one of my foreign exchange friends teach me how to make it.” You let out a dramatic sigh. “I can't tell you how many times I messed up baking this damn dessert.”

Miss Bradford looked at the sweet treat with tears in her eyes. “Oh, [Name]…” She let out a wet laugh. “You didn't have to do that.”

You smiled at the older woman. “I know I didn't have to, but I wanted to.”

She suddenly reaches over as quickly as all the tubes hooked up to her allowed her and brought you into a tight hug. You fretted over her before she cut you off.

“Thank you, [Name].” She whispered. You reciprocated her hug gently.

“You're welcome, Miss Bradford. Though I can't guarantee it'll be just like the real thing.” You playfully warned.

She let out a laugh as she pulled away from the hug. “I'm sure it will be wonderful.” She gives you a grateful smile. She then evenly separates the dessert and gives you half of it. You shook your hands no at the offer.

“No no, Miss Bradford, I made this for you so you don't have to share it with me.” You politely decline.

She glares at you but smiles. “I know I don't have to but I want to.” She quipped.

You gasp. “How dare you throw my own words back at me!”

“Just take the damn dessert, Dr. [Last Name].” She laughed out loud.

Letting out a sigh, you grab the plate from her and begin to eat with her. You both chatted for a couple of minutes after finishing before you were paged to be back down in the emergency room. You grabbed the plastic container the dessert was in and threw it away. As you moved the chair back to its proper place, you looked at Miss Bradford.

Reaching a hand out, you place it over her own. “Thank you for eating today, Miss Bradford.” You tell her sincerely. “I know it's getting hard but all of the nurses are telling me that you're doing great.”

“Just two more rounds and it will be over.” You encouraged her.

The older woman nods as she grasps your hand and gives it a tight squeeze. A nonverbal thank you.

“Do you need anything else before I leave?” You ask.

She shakes her head. “No, Dr. [Last Name]. I'm quite alright. Now go save some lives.” She lets go of your hand and shoos you off.

You roll your eyes teasingly. “I'll be back to check on you after your treatment. Try not to see me this time around!” You open the door and wave back at her. “Good luck! You got this!” You then swiftly leave the room and head back to your station.

As soon as you were gone, Miss Bradford’s smile dropped immediately. She laid her head back and lifelessly looked at the ceiling. Tears started to fall from her cobalt eyes as she thought about you and the gift you had made for her.

“I'm gonna miss you, [Name].” She whispered into the empty room.

—

After three days, you fortunately had the day off from working so you immediately went to go see Miss Bradford.

You soon made it to the familiar room. “Hi Miss Bradford! How do you feel-” You stop in your tracks upon seeing Miss Bradford lying in front of you. The older woman looked nothing like what you had seen three days prior. Her beautiful salt and pepper hair had begun to fall out and her skin looked like it was barely hanging onto her bones.

You quickly come back to reality. This is what chemo does. And elderly people tend to not survive the drug. You remind yourself.

You take a deep breath and walk towards the bed. “Miss Bradford?” You call out. “It's me, Dr. [Last Name].”

The woman slowly opened her eyes. Her bleary and glazed over eyes tiredly searched for the voice calling out to her before landing on your form. Her dull blue eyes light up in recognition.

“[Name].” She croaked out yet still gave you a smile.

You give a smile right back to her. “Hi Miss Bradford.” You greet softly. You squat down next to the bed so it was easier to make eye contact. “How're you feeling?”

She let out a tired sigh. “Like shit.”

You chuckled quietly before you both sat in silence for a few moments. You open your mouth to say something but the older woman beats you to it.

“I don't think I'm gonna make this round, sweetheart.”

You clench your jaw hearing her statement. “Don't say that.” You tell her firmly. “I thought you wanted to kick this cancer’s ass?”

The poor woman couldn't even manage a chuckle. “Don't all patients say that?” She asked. She looks past you and out the window. “I think it's my time. I can feel it.”

She then closed her eyes and gave you a grateful smile while reaching up to cup your cheek. “Thank you, [Name], for sticking by my side even when my own children didn't. I couldn't have asked for a more wonderful doctor to take care of me.”

You held the hand that was on your cheek and gave the older woman a sad smile as if to say “I'm sorry for not doing enough”, yet she seemed to understand what your smile conveyed as she began to caress your cheek as a means to console you.

“Keep saving lives, Dr. [Last Name].”

The steady flat note of a heart rate monitor tells you that your patient has finally passed away.

Her hand that was on your cheek laid flaccid on your own. You closed your eyes and let out a shaky sigh. After a few minutes of sitting in silence with your deceased patient, you press the nurse’s call button. You then place her hand next to her on the bed. Shortly after several nurses come into the room and begin to console you while covering Miss Bradford’s body with the sheet. You watched them as they wheeled her out of the room.

She told you to keep saving lives and you plan on doing just fucking that.

—

It was dark out when you finally left the hospital after you said your last goodbyes to Miss Bradford. The temperature had dropped significantly causing a shiver to run down your spine and goosebumps form on your arms.

You're not going to lie. Even though she told you that she was ready and already accepted her death, you couldn't help but feel like you failed her; so you were feeling pretty depressed. Everybody was so determined to get her healthy again, to go back to a somewhat normal life again. But it was never that easy.

You passed several buildings as you continued home. Soon you were passing your current town's local park when you suddenly stopped, a sudden feeling of anxiety had come out of nowhere. It felt like there were eyes on you, watching your every move. Your face sets into a hard glare to try and look intimidating. You turn around in a circle trying to find any suspicious people, yet you only found yourself alone in the street which unsettled you even more.

A sudden rustling causes you to whip your head to the right. Your eyes immediately lock onto a bright pair of golden ones that look at you from the tree line. Neither one of you refused to blink or look away, seeing who would back down first.

Your eyes widen when the other set of eyes seem to just dissipate into thin air. After a few moments of trying to process what the hell just happened, you shake your head.

I must be going insane. You thought. When you turned around to continue home, your gaze caught sight of something on the sidewalk. On the sidewalk was what looked like gold flecks of dust hovering in front of you. Being the completely logical person you were, you tried to kick the dust away from you. However doing so only caused more gold flecks to appear and soon a trail of them started to manifest that led into the forest where you saw the pair of eyes. You looked at the trail bewildered. What the actual fuck is going on? You drop your head and let out a defeated sigh.

“Yeah, I'm over this.” You mumble out loud. You walk through the trail dead set on going home and sleeping for the entire day tomorrow. Now you weren't going to lie, yes you do get upset whenever one of your patients pass away, but normally not this upset because that was part of your job; it's bound to happen. But Miss Bradford’s death seemed to be taking a bigger toll on you than you thought.

However, as you tried to walk through the trail it forcefully turned your body to walk to the forest. Your eyes widen as your adrenaline spikes and your fight or flight kicks in as you start thrashing around, trying to release its invisible hold on you.

“Hey, wait! Stop!” You cry out. You whip your head in all directions, trying to look for someone to help you. “Help! Anyone, please!” Yet all you received was silence from the empty street. While the gold dust continued to push you toward, you still tried to fight against it though you quickly began to falter thanks to the mentally and physically taxing day you just went through.

As if it had sense you were giving up, the trail abruptly stopped pushing you. For a split second you thought about running off again but decided against it. You watched as the trail formed and led even deeper into the forest where the bushes and trees were so thick that not even the bright moon that was above could illuminate it. Your eyes flicker down to the trail before going back to the forest then back down to the trail. You grimace at the trail as if you were saying “do I really have to?” to it.

All of a sudden, your head whips up to the tree line as you hear music softly playing from it. From your limited musical knowledge, it sounded like it was a harp or some type of string instrument. You feel your muscles relax and your heart slows its frantic pace as the soft melody coursed around you, like a warm comforting blanket that had just come out of the dryer, and a sense of peace had washed over you.

The logical side of your brain was screaming at you to not listen to it. To not be a dumbass and see where it was coming from. To run away as fast as you could while screaming for help, yet you already knew that wasn't going to work. But the hypnotic song that the harp-like instrument was playing kicked that side of your brain to the curb as it lured you into the forest.

Your feet moved before you even realized it and soon you began to bush limbs away. After a few minutes of trying to follow where the music was coming from, it started to get louder and then light filtered through the trees. You quickened your pace and pushed away the last of the trees, but froze in your place as the music suddenly stopped and at what you walked upon.

In front of you was nothing but a vast and endless bright blue sky. From above where the sun continued to glow brightly but seemed to be twice the size of what it was before, to below you where you could see a single hint of land anywhere. Clouds rolled by thanks to the gentle breeze that blew past you and tall pillars were littered throughout the area, some were even floating!

You turn back to the forest behind you with a confused expression before looking back at the open sky. Wasn't it just night before? And why is this… oddly familiar? Where have I seen this before? You wondered.

You jumped nearly ten feet in the air when you heard a noise at your feet. You look down to see individual slabs of concrete form a bridge several feet out in front of you and the gold trail resumes onto the bridge.

You stare at the bridge processing what just occurred. You could practically hear the Jeopardy theme song playing in the background. You sharply inhale and your eyes widen when finally realized why this was all familiar.

Motherfucking Genshin Impact! I thought I recognized this loading screen!

You place a hesitant foot on the bridge, expecting it to crumble but it stood sturdy. You take another step, then another, and after four steps the bridge begins to form out again. You keep walking as the bridge does so. You do this for a few moments, giggling to yourself about what is actually transpiring.

“I really have gone insane.” You laughed. “Ah, and my future was so promising.”

A loud boom from below cuts you off from your self deprecating thoughts. What the hell? You get down on your knees and crawl over the edge of the bridge to see a huge black rip in the sky.

“Outlanders,” A voice boomed out. “your journey ends here.”

And out stepped the Unknown God.

Oh shit. You gasp quietly as your heart rate accelerates at the sight of her. She's hotter in person. You looked around for the twins and quickly spotted them on a platform just below the Unknown God.

“Who’re you?” The queen herself, Lumine, calls out.

“The sustainer of heavenly principles.” The Unknown God summons a black cube in her hand. “The arrogation of mankind ends here.” She then creates a cube below the twins, forcing them to jump out of the way. They spin in the air and summon their, much cooler than the ones in the game, wind gliders with swords in hand.

The Unknown God sends multiple horrifying trails of cubes after the twins, forcing them to fly and twirl out of the way of them while causing the whole sky to rumble somehow. Soon the twins fly towards the Unknown God and collide with her creating a huge explosion.

The explosion caused the bridge you were on to shake due to the force. You grabbed on tighter to the ledge in hopes of keeping your balance, but an aftershock made you slip off from the edge. You let out a terrified scream as you suddenly began to fall.

Your scream caught the trio's attention and made them look at you. The twin’s faces morph into a shocked and horrified expression as you fall while the Unknown God’s eyes narrow in recognition. “There you are.” And sent cubes after you, yet you are completely immune to what's happening around you thanks to the wind that was blowing in your ears.

Lumine quickly yelled to her brother. “Aether, catch her!” She diverted her attention back to the god. “I'll take care of this!”

Aether jumped into action and quickly flew to you. He willed his wind gliders to move faster than the cubes and was soon on you. He then flies underneath you and catches you bridal style. You let out a loud “oof” as you roughly collided with something and opened your eyes, which had subconsciously closed when you fell, to see Aether flying away with you in his arms and away from the cubes.

Aether looks down to your wind blown form. “Are you okay?” He asks gently. How you could hear him over the wind, you didn't know, but you could only stare at him in shock, not actually believing that he was real.

Taking in your silence as being in shock from the fall, he flies higher in the air and turns to the Unknown God to see his twin getting sucked into the god’s cubes.

“Lumine!” He cried out. He looked between you and his sister before ultimately throwing you over his shoulder like a sack of potatoes while keeping a firm hold on your thighs. He zooms to the god at high speeds which catches you off guard.

“What the fuck?!” You screech. You were starting to get a little motion sickness from all of the sudden movements.

Aether dips behind the god and swings his sword at her which causes an even larger explosion than before. You let out a scream at the loud sound. You could feel Aether’s chest rising and falling rapidly under your legs due to him panting. You hear him gasp and you turn over his head to see what was happening, though you already knew.

However, the sight of the smoke from the explosion coming back and encasing Aether’s hand was more terrifying in real life than it was in the game.

“Hold on!” He orders then quickly readjusted you so that he had a hold of your waist. You wrap your arms around his shoulders and cover your face in his shoulder, bracing for any sort of pain. Soon your vision started to turn black, but before it covered it entirely you heard Aether scream out to the Unknown God.

“Wait, don't go! Give my sister back!”

—

A/N: Kazuha is now officially the ninth member of the harem. Also, y'all... Inazuma? Lord help me I want to add Gorou and Thoma to the harem as well.

Side note, for all of the male characters that have a "young adult" physique like Aether, Kazuha, Xiao, etc. they're taller than they are in the game, from 5'6"-5'8" (Xiao still being the shortest) while those with an "adult" are anywhere from 5'10-6'2", because I said so lol.

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theladyofdeath · 3 years

Text

Life As We Know It {Chapter Two}

Summary: After the sudden deaths of Nesta’s sister and Cassian’s best friend, they gain guardianship of their nephew, Nyx.

Based on Life As We Know It (2010) and a prompt sent in by anonymous for our Nessian fanfic contest. This is a modern au.

Instead of doing a tag list for this story, we have decided to have a set posting schedule. Chapters will be posted weekly on Mondays and Thursdays. Chapters will be posted on both my and Shelby's blogs! >> @snelbz

Life As We Know It Masterlist

Shelby's Masterlist

Tara's Masterlist

Trigger warning: death

The vibrations beneath her pillow had nearly stopped by the time Nesta dug it out and held it up to her ear.

“Hell-hello?” she asked, barely able to keep her eyes open, barely able to get the words out.

Her eyes adjusted as she sat up and looked at the alarm clock on Feyre and Rhysand’s bedside table.

1:26 a.m.

“Is this Nesta Archeron?” a quiet, female voice asked.

It was the tone that got Nesta.

It was the tone that had her sitting up straight, her heart slowing in her chest. “Yes, this is Nesta.”

“Nesta, this is Claire from Velaris Hospital,” she began. “There’s been an accident-.”

It was all she heard.

After that, everything became blurred and the words that Claire spoke made absolutely no sense at all.

Rhys and Feyre were supposed to be home the following evening, the last she’d heard from her sister, she and Rhys were going to dinner and then out dancing before heading back up to the cabin.

That had been a little before eight, almost six hours ago. She could hear the rain coming down, much harder than it had been when she’d gone to bed, even a few hours before. Nyx had been asleep by seven, only waking up to cry once or twice a night the whole time she’d been watching him. All in all, the weekend had been uneventful, but she was ready for Rhys and Feyre to be home, so she could go home to her townhouse, to peace and quiet and blessed, blessed silence.

But as she quickly tucked Nyx into his car seat, doing her best not to wake the sleeping baby up, she tried not to think about the phone call. She tried not to think about the firm, but steady tone of voice as she drove across town, to the hospital.

She had been to the hospital before.

Twice in the last fifteen years.

Once when her mother passed, once her sickness finally took her.

And once again when their father passed over complications from his heart surgery.

Nesta hated that drive, hated pulling into the hospital’s parking lot. She didn’t trust it, not one bit. She hated it. Hated the ground on which it stood.

As she parked her car in front of the building, she looked in the rearview mirror. Nyx was still fast asleep, completely unaware of what was happening, completely unaware of the phone call that had just occurred only half an hour before.

There’s been an accident.

Nesta got out of the car. She shut the driver’s side and went to the back. She carefully unbuckled Nyx from his carseat and picked him up, holding him tightly against her chest as she covered him with his oldest, softest, favorite blanket.

The parking lot was nearly empty.

Nesta carried Nyx inside.

You need to come quickly.

She found Azriel by the doors leading deeper into the hospital, calling out his name as soon as she saw him. He turned, and she nearly froze at the look on his face, the paleness and hollow look in his eyes. But she couldn’t and she hurried to where he stood, with a stone-faced doctor.

We did everything we could.

The next few minutes were a blur of explanations and condolences, but Nesta could do nothing but hold onto Nyx, still sleeping soundly in her arms. She hadn’t even realized she was crying until Azriel slid an arm around her shoulders, offering her what little comfort he could.

They’re gone.

They had been driving back to the cabin when the storm had hit. Both of them had been drinking, but not enough to even break the blood alcohol level. The winding roads leading up into the mountains quickly grew slick and when they hydroplaned, Rhys had lost control of the car.

With how hard it was coming down, he hadn’t even seen the ledge coming up, or how far the drop was to the bottom of the ravine.

Nesta prayed that wherever they had gone after their final breath that they were together.

And that Rhysand wouldn’t be blaming himself.

It wasn’t his fault.

She repeated that prayer one after the other until she had begun to doze in and out of sleep.

When she woke, it was nearly five in the morning.

Nyx had slept through it all, hadn’t even realized what had happened. When they got home, Nesta had laid him in his crib, where he had remained, sleeping soundly, ever since.

4:56 a.m.

Nesta had managed to sleep for nearly forty-five minutes.

That in itself was a blessing.

Yet, as she threw her legs over the side of the bed, Nesta felt guilty. How could she sleep after the news she had just received?

None of it seemed real.

Her little sister, her youngest sister.

Dead.

All that was left of their family was her and Elain.

Her, and Elain, and Nyx, and Seph.

Dad. Mom. Feyre.

Gone.

Nesta stumbled into the bathroom and looked in the mirror. She didn’t feel a thing. After turning the faucet on, letting the cold water run for a minute, she splashed some on her face.

It didn’t bring her back to reality like she was hoping for.

She was hoping it was all a dream.

But it wasn’t.

Her legs carried her into Nyx’s nursery, where she sat for the next couple of hours, watching him sleep, peacefully. Not knowing, not realizing, not understanding his parents were never coming home.

She heard the front door open around seven-thirty, rushing down the stairs, praying that she had, in fact, dreamed it all and Rhys and Feyre would be coming inside, home a few hours early.

But it wasn’t Rhys, or Feyre. Instead, it was another familiar head of golden-brown hair, her eyes trained in the hardwood just inside the walkway. The door had barely closed before Nesta made it down the stairs and wrapped her arms around Elain.

They both collapsed, falling to their knees on the worn rug, as Elain sobbed into her sister’s shoulder.

The following days were a blur. A constant stream of people calling, texting, reaching out to see what could be done. Nesta and Elain handled the arrangements, with Azriel’s help, but none of them realized how prepared Feyre and Rhys had been for their own deaths.

Maybe it was because they’d both lost their parents young. Maybe it was because they didn’t want Nyx to ever have to deal with it on his own. All Nesta had to do was sign some paperwork and present their death certificates.

The funeral home had taken it from there.

She sat in the corner of the room, wearing a simple black dress that Feyre had always told her looked matronly on anyone else, but made her look like a badass CEO. It was one of her favorites. She figured Feyre would have wanted her to wear it today.

She hadn’t been able to bring herself to look into the caskets yet, to see what her sister and brother-in-law looked like, if they even looked like themselves.

She’d never be able to wipe the memory of their pale, lifeless bodies from her mind, as she and Azriel had to confirm that it was them in the hospital. Until that moment, she’d held out hope that maybe they had been wrong. That maybe someone had stolen their car and they were waiting at the bar for the rain to die down.

But even in death she couldn’t mistake their faces.

She couldn’t imagine that they looked anything like they once did, knowing that she’d never see Feyre’s bright smile or amusement sparking in Rhysand’s eyes.

The funeral dragged on, a preacher they had grown up with leading the crowd that had gathered. Nesta was asked if she wanted to say something, but she didn’t. What was there to say? There was too much to say.

Nesta couldn’t.

So, she didn’t.

They carried the caskets out and loaded them up in the hearses.

Nesta didn’t remember getting behind the wheel, didn’t remember loading Nyx into his carseat, didn’t remember driving to the cemetery.

And yet, she ended up standing in front of a set of holes in the ground with Nyx on her hip. Only a few words were said before the caskets were lowered into the ground.

Nesta wondered what was going through Nyx’s head. The one-year-old didn’t make a sound, not a peep as the day went on. He simply remained perfectly calm, his head resting on Nesta’s shoulder as she swayed back and forth.

“I can take him, if you want to say goodbye.”

Nesta spun around, meeting the eyes of Cassian Nazari.

He’d been crying, she could tell. If it wasn’t for the redness in his puffy eyes, Nesta surely would have snapped.

“There’s no need,” Nesta said, with an empty calmness. “I’ve already said my goodbyes.”

It was a lie, of course.

Could you ever really say goodbye to someone you loved?

He didn’t push her, just silently stepped up next to her and stared at the mounds of dirt. Nearly everyone was gone, Azriel taking a silent, distant Elain home. Mor, Emerie, Gwyn, Amren, and Varian had left just a few minutes after them. The only ones still present were those who had filled the graves, the preacher, saying a few final prayers for peace, and the three of them.

“I don’t…” His voice was rough, in a way she’d never heard it. “I keep waiting for him to call me and tell me it’s all dumbass prank,” he breathed. “That this was all some elaborate joke to get back at me for something.”

Nesta nodded, understanding. She blinked, but was unable to stop the few silent tears from sliding down her cheeks. She didn’t know what to say, but for once she agreed with Cassian.

“If you, uh, need anything…” Cassian began, before shaking his head and taking a deep breath. “If you need anything just give me a call.”

Nesta nodded once. She knew he was just saying it out of kindness due to the situation, but she supposed it was still a kind offer.

“I’ll be fine,” she said, after a moment had passed. Without giving Cassian another glance, she was turning toward her car, walking away.

Her legs became heavier with each step she took, but she continued onward until she was sitting behind the wheel of her little black car, Nyx buckled into his carseat.

He began to fuss.

Nesta understood.

Maybe he was beginning to realize that his mom and dad were never coming back.

As Nesta drove back toward the house, her vision blurred as the tears came.

The next few days passed by slowly. She and Nyx made it just fine, but the time seemed to drag on and on and on.

She had just put Nyx down for his afternoon nap when her phone began to ring, a number she didn’t recognize showing up on her screen.

She hesitated for a moment, not sure if she could handle another one of Rhys or Feyre’s friends offering their condolences. Their pity.

Ultimately, she grabbed her phone, swiping across the screen to answer the call.

“Nesta Archeron speaking.”

A smooth voice came from the other end of the line. “Ms. Archeron, my name is Tarquin Hadrian.”

She paused. The name didn’t seem familiar, so she cleared her throat. “How can I help you, Mr. Hadrian?”

“I’m terribly sorry for your loss, Ms. Archeron,” he began. Nesta sighed quietly, waiting for the words to continue, but he said something she wasn’t expecting. “I’m the Lunasa’s attorney. I was hoping to speak with you about their will.”

Shit. Nesta hadn’t even thought about a will, hadn’t thought about any of the plans Rhys and Feyre had made. If they’d planned everything, down to their burials and graves, surely they had prepared a last will and testament. “Of- Of course.”

“Are you free this afternoon?” He asked. “I know it’s short notice, but I’d wanted to give your family as much time as possible to grieve, however, there are some matters that need to be handled sooner rather than later.”

“Yes, I can be there any time,” she said, looking at the clock. Nyx wouldn’t be up from his nap for another hour or so, but she could figure something out. “When would you prefer?”

“Is three o’clock okay?”

After Nesta’s agreement, he was giving her the address to his office and the call was over and Nesta was calling Elain, asking to drop Nyx off on her way over. She didn’t want to wake him, nor did she think a meeting with a lawyer was a good place for a one-year-old.

An hour later, she was pulling into the parking lot of the small law office, and she froze in her car when she spied a familiar truck across the lot.

What in the hell was he doing here?

Nesta made her way inside, letting the pretty receptionist know who she was here to see and she was escorted back to a plush office.

Cassian already waited inside, sitting across the desk from a handsome, dark-skinned man.

“Ms. Archeron,” he said, standing, extending a hand. Nesta shook it with her own. She didn’t miss that Cassian merely sat there as she entered. “Thank you for meeting with me.”

“Of course,” she nodded, taking the seat next to Cassian. Neither of them acknowledged the other, which was for the best.

There was a large stack of papers on Tarquin’s desk and as he sat, he began to lead through them one by one. Sighing, he laid his hands atop the papers.

“I’m going to cut right to the chase here,” he said. “Did Feyre or Rhys talk with either of you about what should happen to Nyx in the event that both of them should die?”

A glance at each other, but they both shook their heads. Cassian said, “No.”

Another deep breath. “They...named the two of you.”

His blue eyes looked between them, and it took Nesta a moment to realize he wasn’t just speaking to her. Just as long as it took Cassian to realize the same.

As one, they both leaned forward, Nesta resting her hands on the desk, Cassian letting his elbows fall in his knees. Nesta said, “They picked us together?” at the same time Cassian asked, “I’m sorry, what?”

Tarquin cleared his throat. “I tried to advise them against it. An unmarried couple, with your own personal history…”

“I don’t understand,” Nesta said, shaking her head. “I…don’t understand.”

“Yeah, me either,” Cassian added.

“Here,” Tarquin said, handing the two of them a letter.

Neither of them reached for it, but Tarquin didn’t back down. He held out the piece of paper until Nesta snatched it and opened it up.

Cassian hovered over her as she read.

Cassian and Nesta,

We are writing this letter in case of a tragedy. Of course, we don’t expect a tragedy to happen, but you never know.

In case something does happen, you’re to take custody of Nyx. Both of you. We know you two don’t get along, but if something were to happen to us, we need you. You see, we want Nyx to have a mom and a dad. We want him to have two people who love and support him no matter what.

There’s a reason we chose you both to be godparents.

Nesta, you have a heart bigger than anyone we’ve ever met, even though you don’t often show it. When you care about someone, you care about them wholeheartedly. You devote your life to them. You make them feel loved, make them feel wanted, make them feel protected. And we know you care about Nyx.

Cass, you love more fiercely than anyone we have ever known. You were dealt a poor hand as a child, and instead of making you bitter, it made you stronger. It made you realize how you want others to be treated, instead of the opposite. You would make an incredible father. Therefore, we made you godfather.

The two of you are opposite halves of the same coin. One of you cannot succeed without the other, even though you’d both probably argue against that statement.

Look.

If you’re reading this, it means that something awful has happened. If you’re reading this, it means that we are gone. And, if we are gone, Nyx needs someone. He needs his godparents.

We know you’re scared. We know you’re heartbroken. But, if you love us, the two of you will work together to create a family-like environment for Nyx.

We love you both.

We believe in you both.

Tell Nyx we love him, too. So damn much.

Rhysand and Feyre

Nesta’s hands shook as she lowered the letter. “We… The two of us can’t… We can barely be in the same room as each other, much less take care of a child.”

“As I said, I advised them against this, especially once they explained your personal history to me,” Tarquin said, leaning back in his chair. He laid a hand atop the paper on his desk again. “As I mentioned before, they were very thorough in their planning, even going so far as to put a sum of a portion of their life insurance to pay off the mortgage of their home. They’ve left it to the two of you as well, to ensure Nyx has the easiest time possible. No on and off weekends, no moving back and forth.”

Nesta was still processing his words, when Cassian asked, “Wait, so we’re supposed to live together? Not only take care of him, which I’ll do anyways, but live in the same house?”

With a blink, Nesta looked at him. “You’ll take care of him? I’ve been taking care of him for over a week now.”

“Well, he’s my responsibility, too,” he replied, practically snarling at her. “I’m not going to disrespect Rhys’s wishes by shirking it off on someone else.”

Nesta was about to say something else, was ready to snap, but Tarquin cut her off. “It was my duty to give you the letter, per their will. What you do with it is up to you.”

Nesta left twenty minutes later, ready to set the entire city on fire. She burst out the front doors but didn’t leave alone. Cassian was just behind her, right on her heels, calling her name.

“I’m his godfather and I’m not letting Rhys down,” he said.

She wasn’t backing down, either. “You realize this isn’t a part time job, right? This is a lifetime commitment, Cassian-.”

“You think I don’t know that?” He asked, stopping in front of her. He paused and blinked, as if he’d just realized she didn’t have him with her. “Where is he?”

She scoffed. “With Elain and Seph. I didn’t want to bring him because I wasn’t sure what this meeting would entail. He’d just gone down for a nap and I didn’t want to mess his schedule up.”

She watched as the words registered, watched as he processed them. He probably didn’t even know Nyx had a nap schedule, and he sure as hell didn’t know what it was.

Nevermind the fact that she hadn’t known it the week before, when Feyre had explained it to her before they’d left. Before they’d-.

Tears stung her eyes, trying to spill over as they always did when she thought about her sister, about Rhys. The fire inside her, the will to fight with Cassian, disappeared almost immediately.

“I need to go get him,” she said, adjusting the purse strap on her shoulder, stepping off the curb towards her car.

Cassian didn’t follow her, and when she pulled out of the parking lot, he was still standing in front of the law offices, looking as lost as she felt.

#nessian #modern au #life as we know it #fanfic #fanfiction #collab #shacmc #acotar #acosf #sjm

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valentineforlemonandcherry · 2 years

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Foxtail & Wolfsbane Part 18

Summary: Your lifelong obsession to hunt down the Nine-Tailed Fox has not gone as expected, and seventeen years later, you find yourself coming back to the place where it all started: Hogwarts. However, with Sirius Black’s escape from Azkaban and Headmaster Dumbledore’s hire of a certain Professor R. J. Lupin, you suddenly find yourself intertwined in the fates of those with whom you thought you had parted ways with long ago. [Multi-Post Story] [Rowan Scamander x Reader] [Remus Lupin x Reader] [Young Sirius Black x Reader] [Tristan Graves x Reader] [Severus Snape x Reader] [Warning: Story Contains Explicit Smut.] [Warning: Rough Sex.] [Warning: Light Degradation.] [Warning: Nonconsent.] *Note: Rowan Scamander, Tristan Graves, Susana Holmes, Cas Carneirus, Henrietta Weiss, and Thomas Picquery are OC characters. *Please do not repost or copy my work without my permission. Thank You!

☾ Click Here for Foxtail & Wolfsbane Home Page (All Chapter Links) ☾

While you were kept captive in America, it felt as though you would be kept captive forever. However, now that you had sprung into action, it was amazing how quickly things happened, one after the other, with the increasing velocity of falling dominos. It was as though the gods above had finally become bored of the slowness of human action and snapped their fingers so that lightning struck and activated all of the events that were to occur in the world – in precise order, of course, but incredibly quickly. So, here is a brief retelling of those events.

* * * * * * * * * *

You stepped back onto European soil on November 1st, 1981. Artemis was tucked away inside your cloak, as she felt a little seasick from the rough landing. You were also quite pleased to have your feet back on steady land.

However, as soon as you made your way back into the city, you paused, taken aback by how many wizards and witches were openly wearing their robes and waving their wands in the middle of busy Muggle streets.

“I say!” A nearby Muggle woman clutched her purse in amazement and gawked at an elderly man standing a few feet away from her, for the man was dressed in bright purple robes and holding aloft his wand, from which electric green and gold fireworks were bursting.

Artemis stuck her nose out and sniffed. Smelling smoke, she mewed unhappily and pulled her nose back into your cloak.

But the elderly man merely smiled at the Muggle woman and chirped ecstatically, “We must all rejoice today, for the Dark Lord is gone at last!”

Another wizard, dressed in more sensible light brown robes, but donning a pointed wizard’s cap with pink elephants all over it, spoke just then. In hushed and reverent tones, he raised his wand as he whispered fervently, “To little Harry Potter – the Boy who Lived!”

A group of witches nearby who had heard the wizard’s proclamation suddenly stopped in their tracks. With sorrowful and serious expressions, they, too, raised their wands into the air and murmured, “To the Boy who Lived.”

For a moment, a burst of yellow sparks from everyone’s wands rose into the air and formed a thin lighting shape in the sky. Then, the sparks fell apart and fizzled out, leaving nothing but a wisp of smoke in the sky, curling up on itself like a serpent’s tongue.

* * * * * * * * * *

Mind abuzz with the incredible news at the disappearance of Lord Voldemort, you were more than a little out of it as your feet carried you back to your childhood home.

Your mother greeted you with a frying pan to the face. Not only did Artemis bark in shock, but the Nine-Tailed Fox within your very soul also yelped as the metal clanged off your nose.

“Oww…! Mom!” you yelped, rubbing your red nose. “That hurt!”

“No contact! Not a word from you for a year! Do you have any idea how worried you made me? How worried you made your little brother, huh? He didn’t even want to go off to college because of you!”

Your mother lifted the frying pan high above her head again.

“Okay, okay!” You hastily ducked under her arm and made your way into the house. Artemis, who had been waiting patiently at your feet, hurriedly scampered in after you.

“What was that!?” Your mother, who had caught a glimpse of Artemis scurrying in quickly after you, had whirled around, with frying pan still at the ready.

“Oh.” You reached down and collected Artemis in your arms. “I’ve a pet fox now.”

Your mother closed your eyes and slowly exhaled. When she opened her eyes, you swore that her irises were shimmering with fury. “All right,” your mother decided. “Never mind the fox. For now.”

Artemis shivered in your arms. She pawed against your arms and buried her head against your arms, avoiding your mother’s frightening gaze.

“Where the hell were you?” your mother inquired.

You paused and cocked your head to the side, pondering your answer. Finally, you answered honestly but vaguely, “America.”

“What? You immigrated?”

“No! No! I visited,” you protested hastily. “You know, like a tourist on holiday?”

“You went on holiday for an entire year? This early in your career?” your mother screeched, still horrified. “I didn’t raise you to be so lazy!”

You sighed and flopped over onto the sofa. (Artemis immediately flattened herself and snuck under the sofa.)

Your mother looked down at you with skepticism written all over your face. “Say, what is your job, anyhow?” she inquired, squinting down at you.

There was no winning with your mother. You looked up at her and replied defeatedly, “Just give me the frying pan again.”

And you got another heavy pat to your stomach, courtesy of your alarmed mother and her trusty weapon.

* * * * * * * * * *

You decided to stay at your mother’s house that night. Your brother was off to college, so you stayed in his room, which, when the two of you were much younger, had been a shared bedroom. Your parents could never afford more than a two-bedroom flat, and since your father passed away, it had only become more difficult to afford housing.

You gazed at all of the pamphlets on your brother’s desk, which had titles like: “Pick the Right College for you!” and “Planning a Smart Career Path.”

A career path… A career?

You picked up one of the pamphlets and thumbed through it: Accountant, lawyer, doctor, engineer, teacher, business analyst…

You threw it aside. Useless for me.

You closed your eyes. Useless…

That’s what it’s all become.

The Order? I was barely linked to it through Remus.

My Nine-Tailed Fox?

You felt the Fox’s tails flicker uneasily in your chest when you spoke aloud her name.

Hardly the dream of freedom I imagined her to be, you thought scathingly – not to her, but to yourself. Just another trap. And she’s not a real Nine-Tailed Fox, anyways. She’s only got eight tails.

You sighed. Turning over in bed, you smushed your face against the pillow and tried to fall asleep.

* * * * * * * * * *

The next day, as soon as the sun came up, you made your way to Diagon Alley. Traversing through the shops, with Artemis curled up around your shoulders and clutching her little paws at your cloak, you spoke to anyone who seemed to have information on what had happened. Eventually, you came to the Leaky Cauldron, where everyone else had gathered (despite it being only ten in the morning). Finally, you began to hear the stories – to hear what had happened to poor little Harry Potter, only one year old and an orphan, for Lily and James Potter had tragically been murdered by none other than Lord Voldemort himself. The manner in which their deaths came about was also tragic: Sirius Black had betrayed them. To add to his crimes, Sirius also killed Peter Pettigrew when Peter came chasing after him for revenge.

Fury smoldered in your heart as you thought bitterly: We should have seen this coming ages ago. If Sirius Black is foul enough to use Remus in such a savage and violent manner every month, basically using him as a claw-sharpener every time Sirius turns into the Grim, of course Sirius is capable of betraying the Potters. What were they thinking, making him their Secret-Keeper?

Flashes of Lily and James’ faces passed through your mind.

Lily, reaching out to you and smiling, with the wedding lights hung above her head sparkling in her beautiful eyes, and saying to you, “I want to thank you for helping me out last-minute.”

James, slapping a friendly hand on Remus’ shoulder and asking you shamelessly, “What d’you like about my boy Moony here?”

Even Peter, whom you had never really crossed paths with, popped up very clearly in your mind. His bashful eyes and squat frame made him look rather cute. He had always been tagging after Remus, and the two of them had often engaged in silent, but intense fights for who got the last piece of chocolate.

All that was so long, you thought wistfully. But now, well -

You blinked. Your heart stopped for a moment. Oh God. Remus. Now he’s all alone.

* * * * * * * * * *

You rushed off to Remus’ flat without any thought whatsoever. But the nearer you got to his flat, the harder you found it to step forward.

Painful memories, which you had purposefully kept at bay in your mind all this time, began to surface again.

“Leave.”

“What?”

“Go.”

“Remus… What – What did I do? Please, tell me, what did I do wrong?”

“Just go. Please.”

You had lifted your hand to knock on Remus’ door, but you paused. You were completely still for a long moment. Artemis poked her head out and cocked her head up at you, wondering why you weren’t moving.

Then, a soft breeze picked up and passed over you, stirring you back to life.

You dropped your hand and then fled. Artemis, surprised by the sudden motion, fell out of your cloak. Fortunately, she was able to land on her feet, and she bounded after you at once. You made it as far as the nearby park before you sank onto a bench and then burst into tears.

“You don’t want me…? You don’t… want me… Remus…”

“Let’s not – Let’s not drag this out any longer.”

“But you asked me. You asked me to stay. You said that you… wanted me. Just two nights ago. Y-You said that. Didn’t you?”

“I did, but I can’t – I can’t follow through on that promise.”

You sobbed into your hands, trying not to wail, but unable to help yourself.

Artemis yelped softly. She leapt up onto the bench next to her. Ears drooping in sadness, she put a consoling paw on your thigh as she sadly hung her head, too.

What’s the point of seeing him, if he doesn’t want me? The last thing he needs right now is another burden. I shouldn’t push myself onto him, even if I am worried about him. Even if I want to see him more than anything.

You heard a long, exasperated sigh in your mind. The Nine-Tailed Fox in your soul chided you, Really, now. What do you gain by putting yourself through this torture? Forget this man.

I can’t, you told her. I can’t forget him. Because I didn’t fall in love with him to gain anything. I just – I just fell in love with him. So, I can’t not love him just because it doesn’t make me happy anymore.

The Fox flicked her tail in irritation at you. Weak. You’re so weak.

* * * * * * * * * *

Two days later, a sleek silver owl came rapping at your mother’s window.

She handed the letter to you wordlessly. Apparently, she was still quite displeased with you and your lax ways – “First, a holiday. And now, smoozing off at your parent’s house,” your mother grumbled, as she fried you eggs and bacon for breakfast. She slid them on your plate and then handed you a fork before slapping you on the back of the head. “What did they teach you at Wizarding School, huh? To be lazy?”

“No, I just came like that, unfortunately,” you mumbled through a mouthful of eggs.

Your mother sighed and turned off the stove. Then, she picked up her broom and swatted Artemis, who had been snoozing away under your chair, on her bottom. “Wake up, you,” she scolded her.

Artemis yelped and woke up and immediately conked her head on the bottom of your chair. She stumbled out, dazed.

“Art!” You quickly slid to the floor and picked her up off the floor. “You okay?”

Artemis let out a woozy bark.

“Mum, you can’t treat her like that!” you said indignantly. “You’ve got to be gentle with Art.”

Your mother snorted impatiently. “Then teach her to be less lazy. Although, you might need to start with yourself. Anyways, I’m off for work. I won’t be back until past midnight.”

“What? That late?”

“Got double shifts,” she relied shortly. With that, she was gone.

However, you glimpsed money on the counter – obviously, money she had left out for you to feed yourself with.

You reached out with one hand and slowly picked up the Muggle bills. You stared at the bills for a moment. Artemis poked her nose at it before looking up at you curiously.

“Love is so strange, isn’t it, Art?” you whispered.

Artemis nodded, wondering if by ‘love,’ you meant the sensation of being swatted on the bum with a broom first thing in the morning.

* * * * * * * * * *

You took the letter back to your brother’s bedroom. Sitting on the bed, you unfolded the letter to find extremely thin, almost spidery, yet very elegant, handwriting across official-looking parchment.

My team is still in an uproar at your disappearance, so I’ll keep both our names off this letter. Anyways, I hope you’re where you intended to be by now. But I’ll cut the sentimentalities, for I need to warn you – that certain cloud you removed from the iris saved my life, but it also means that that cloud has escaped into the open. There is a history concerning that cloud that you know but little of, and here is not the place to risk explaining it all. However, you must know this – that cloud has every incentive to go after G or D. G, as you know, is no longer of this world in physical form. That leaves D.

I think it best if you head to your academy. Not only will D keep you safe, for he knows generally about you, but you will also do him a favor by staying besides him and being on watch for the cloud.

As for me, the little newt will be back, so I expect my name to get cleared then. I say this to dissuade you from returning. Don’t you dare come back. In fact, I’d rather you not reply to this letter at all. D will alert me if you do appear at your academy, and that’s all the confirmation I’ll need.

Nonetheless, do be safe. Don’t you dare put me through the trouble of tracing your pawprints all the way over to Europe.

At the bottom of the page, there was a tiny scribble, and you could just make out the Graves crest.

‘His team’ clearly means Tristan’s Aurors, who are furious at my disappearance, you reasoned. And by ‘that certain cloud’… He means the Obscurial that was hiding in his eye, which the Nine-Tailed Fox ultimately helped to push out of his soul.

Your eyes traced the letter again: There is a history concerning that cloud that you know but little of…

You remembered Susana Grindelwald telling you, “The child’s name was Credence Barebone.”

Right, you thought, I don’t really know anything about Credence Barebone, other than the fact that he was the oldest wizard to ever house an Obscurial within him, and that he ultimately died, and the Obscurial latched onto Tristan instead.

You read the next part of Tristan’s letter: However, you must know this – that cloud has every incentive to go after G or D. G, as you know, is no longer of this world in physical form. That leaves D.

You thought over this. Tristan is telling me that the Obscurial would have reason to want to hurt G or D… Grindelwald or Dumbledore, I suppose. Grindelwald means Susana, who has hidden her physical form and is by Tristan’s side. Ah, so that’s what Tristan means by “no longer of this world in physical form.”

You hesitated. But I guess Dumbledore may be unaware that the Obscurial has escaped, since only Tristan and I know about the Obscurial right now. Hm…

Your eyes fell onto the next line: I think it best if you head to your academy.

Go back to Hogwarts? you wondered.

You fell back onto the bed and stared up at the dingy ceiling with its cracked paint. A familiar voice entered your mind, whispering, “Delphinus, the dolphin. One Greek legend says that Delphinus helped Poseidon find his queen, Amphitrite, a mermaid, by bringing her back to live in Poseidon’s underwater court…”

I do miss the Ravenclaw night sky tapestry, you thought to yourself. I think… maybe I do want to go back to Hogwarts.

* * * * * * * * * *

Asking Dumbledore for a job wasn’t quite as awkward as you had feared. When you put forth your proposal honestly, saying, “Headmaster, I’ve never been quite the – er – studious type. But I believe I would make for a good Gamekeeper’s assistant,” Dumbledore gave you a most knowing smile. Besides him, Fawkes let out a low cry. The Nine-Tailed Fox within you stirred.

Dumbledore spoke to you. “I rather thought you were interested in certain spirits.”

You admitted, “Well, yes, that’s true.”

With a bright twinkle in his eyes, Dumbledore asked you, “And I trust you found what you were looking for when you left the Order?”

You paused. How does he know? you wondered.

“Anyways,” Dumbledore said smoothly, moving on, “the timing is most opportune for you. You see, Professor Gallant plans to retire in three years’ time from his Ghoul Studies position. You should study to take over his position. Three years is ample time to cover the basics of any types of ghouls you have not studied, and I will instruct Professor Gallant to impart his knowledge to you. For the time being, we can set you up at Hagrid’s assistant, as you have requested.”

You nodded. That suited you just fine. “Thank you, Headmaster.”

* * * * * * * * * *

So began your second life at Hogwarts. You loved being back at the castle, though you spent most of your time outdoors. And at all costs, you avoided the places that reminded you of a certain brown-haired boy…

Will you give it a rest? The Nine-Tailed Fox sighed in your head. Besides, she thought, you haven’t fed me for a long while.

You grimaced. You had been doing everything in your power to avoid using her magic, but of course, it had been months now, and she was bound to be hungry.

Only – There’s no one around here, you told her.

Hm… The Nine-Tailed Fox lithely turned in a circle and then she settled back down. Fine. We’ll have to wait until we can find ourselves a worthy suitor. We can’t just entice anyone, can we? First, it has to be someone you have a natural connection with. Second, it has to be with someone who has a soul strong enough to withstand my spiritual energy, else we’ll drain the person of their life force. It wouldn’t do to kill off the Hogwarts staff members, would it?

No, let’s stay clear of that, you thought wryly. I’ve only just started my so-called career.

The Nine-Tailed Fox laughed lightly in your head. You humans are so funny. Why do you have to make up such strange concepts? Why can’t you just be, and have that be enough?

Besides that, you wondered, how long are you planning to stay with me?

I don’t get to decide that, the Nine-Tailed Fox replied. I can’t live in this realm unless I’m in your soul.

So, I’d have to go back to that Forest?

It’s not all that simple, you know, the Fox hummed in your head.

What do you mean?

There is a hollowness in your soul, little one. That’s where I reside. So long as this hollow in your heart remains, I believe I, too, must remain within you. That’s why I find your pathetic desire for your old partner so wearisome.

Because you’re bored of me already? you guessed.

Precisely.

* * * * * * * * * *

But then, there was a most unexpected turn of events. It all started when a rather foolish student had decided to accept a dare and hang with one arm off the willow tree besides the Great Lake.

It was only when he lost the dare and fell into the water with a soft splash that it became evident that he couldn’t swim. Down, down, he sank, and the other kids started to scream when they realized he wasn’t coming back up.

You happened to be coming up from Hagrid’s just then. The children raced over to you, begging you to save their friend.

You immediately dove into the water. Magic would work, but you had to have a sense of where the boy was and how to help him. Blind magic with no intention was almost impossible to pull off.

You didn’t see the boy right away, for the water was too murky, but you did see movement in the cloudy world before you. Pointing your wand at the cloud, you breathed out, “Ascendio!”

To your relief, you saw a young boy emerge from the cloudy water and zoom out of the water. However, you suddenly frowned as you realized that the inky cloud in the water was restricted to only one section. Before you could ponder this any longer, a tentacle shot out of the cloud and grabbed you around your waist.

You tried to scream, but being underwater, no sound came out. You thrashed about, though thankfully, you kept your head enough to keep a tight grip on your wand. You would have used a spell, but you were all out of breath and unable to cast a spell.

Suddenly, a low, thrumming growl rang out in your chest. Let her go.

A huge, slimy eye appeared out of the greyish-black cloud and blinked at you – It was the Giant Squid.

I said – let her go.

The Giant Squid seemed to recognize the Nine-Tailed Fox’s voice, and forlornly let you go.

You floated in the water for a moment, frozen, when the Nine-Tailed Fox whispered in your ear, Little one, swim up.

Waking up from your panicked daze, you kicked your feet and made your way up to the water’s surface. You broke the surface of the Lake and gasped desperately for air. It wasn’t until you took that first gulp of fresh air that you realized that your throat was absolutely burning. You crawled out of the water. All of the kids had gone – half of them were carrying the little boy back to the castle, and the other half, now worried for you, had run over to Hagrid’s.

You slowly got to your feet, still gasping for breath. You clutched at the stitch in your chest. You looked over your shoulder at the dark waters of the Black Lake, and you shivered. So, that’s what the Giant Squid looks like under water – or at least, that’s what his eyeball looks like. I swear, his eye was the size of my head…

However, you caught a glimpse of yourself in the water just then and you realized that you were sporting fox ears on your head, and what was more, your hair was a long, glistening silver. You gasped.

Just then, Hagrid’s familiar voice boomed out behind you, “Professor!”

With a groan, you dove back into the water. Sticking your wand into your pants pocket, you hurriedly swept your long hair to the side and tucked it under your neck, to try to make it appear shorter. The silver, you hoped, you could explain away with how lake water reacted to blue hair. Finally, you reached up and covered your ears with your hands.

It was just in time, as Hagrid and three of the first-year students came racing up to the shoreline. “Professor, are yeh all righ’?” Hagrid called loudly.

“Fine!” you yelled back. Your throat burned as you shouted. “Just going for a little swim!”

The kids looked confused, trading skeptical glances. Thankfully, Hagrid immediately understood that you were trying to hide something from the kids. “Off yeh go, I’ll help the professor out,” Hagrid told them, and he shoo’ed them away.

Then, Hagrid came closer to the water. “What’s wrong?” he asked you.

“Um… Um…” You were doing your best to stay afloat with just your feet, but it was difficult. Finally, you admitted, “Hagrid, can you please get Professor Dumbledore for me?”

“‘Course, I can do that, but will you be okay all by yerself?” Hagrid asked you. “It’ll take me a bit to run up.”

“I’ll be fine,” you assured him.

When Hagrid left, running up to the castle in huge strides, you let out a sigh of relief as you dropped your hands. You kept yourself afloat much easier now, though you kept looking down at the water in fear that the Giant Squid would come back.

However, the Nine-Tailed Fox reassured you, He won’t be coming back. And besides, he would never hurt you.

You sure about that? you wondered skeptically.

Yes, he was simply curious about you.

“Professor.”

You looked up to see Dumbledore, in his starry purple robes, standing at the water’s edge.

Dumbledore’s eyes glinted brilliantly behind his half-moon glasses as he watched you swim back to shore. You arose from the lake, with water streaming off of your silver hair.

Dumbledore paused. “Well, now, I must say, I’m pleased to see that your single-minded focus in catching the Fox has paid off, then? Madam Pince used to come to me with reports of all of the international books you were requesting about the Fox. But, it seems that the Nine-Tailed Fox finds it amusing to change your physical appearance, does she?”

“Yes, Headmaster,” you said, a little bashfully. “I figured that if anyone knew a solution for this, it would be you.”

The Fox snickered in your head. You know what the solution is, little one.

What in hell? We’re not going to traumatize Dumbledore like that!

The Fox laughed heartily. No, no, no, of course not. I told you before, I can’t create magic out of thin air. I can only amplify what comes from you – that is, a connection that already exists. That type of connection doesn’t exist here, obviously.

Oh, thank Merlin, you breathed out, relieved.

Then, Dumbledore spoke, “I cannot think of a permanent solution, for I myself have never encountered a Nine-Tailed Fox before. However, a temporary solution may be to take a Disguising Potion. You should carry some around with you in a vial.”

“A Disguising Potion?”

“Yes,” Dumbledore nodded. “It’s almost like a diluted Polyjuice Potion, though that is gravely oversimplifying the matter.”

“It sounds difficult to make,” you said uncertainly.

Dumbledore replied, “Well, then, Severus should be able to conjure up a Potion for you.”

Severus Snape. You nearly grimaced. But you tried your best to swallow down the feeling of distaste as you replied, “Yes, Headmaster. I’ll go and see him about it.”

“Very well, and in the meantime - ” Dumbledore waved his wand so quickly you barely caught the motion, and a crown of blue flowers graced your hair and their stems braided themselves into your silver hair and pulled it up, so that it hid your ears and made it look like your hair was quite short again. “That shall do for our trip back up to the castle.”

Extending his hand, Dumbledore said politely, “After you.”

But before you stepped past him, you said to Dumbledore, “Are you really not surprised, Headmaster?”

Dumbledore’s eyes twinkled. “I’ve found over the years that it is far more productive to bask in the delight of a surprise, than to be overwhelmed by the shock of it all.”

You blinked.

Dumbledore chuckled, before suggesting politely, “But for now, may I suggest we head up to the castle? If you catch a cold, Madam Pomfrey can treat you, but I’m not sure how she would go about treating a mythical fox…”

The Nine-Tailed Fox snorted. Me? Catch a cold? Never.

Lucky you, you thought wryly, as you sneezed brilliantly into your sopping wet cloak sleeve.

* * * * * * * * * *

Thankfully, you were able to shower in hot water and change into comfortable, warm clothes before the cold really settled into your bones.

However, when you looked at yourself in the mirror, you were surprised to see yourself still sporting silver hair and fox ears.

“What…?” You frowned. “Why aren’t you gone yet? I’m not in danger anymore.”

The Nine-Tailed Fox hissed at you, Because, we’re hungry, little one. We’ve been hungry. I kept telling you, and you ignored me.

You groaned. Well, you’re going to have to find something else to satiate your appetite, because there is simply no one here that will do.

With that, you picked up a cloak with a large hood that came down to nearly your eyes and you slung it over yourself before you decided to make your way down to a certain Potion Master’s office.

* * * * * * * * * *

Rap, rap.

“Who is it?”

You hesitated. There’s a strong chance he might not open the door if he realizes it’s me, you thought. You weren’t sure why you thought this. It wasn’t as though you and Severus had any bad blood between the two of you. But still, your impression of Severus was that he was so antisocial that there was a higher chance of his entertaining a stranger than entertaining an acquaintance.

So, you said, quite truthfully, “I’m a new assistant professor here. Dumbledore sent me here to – to…” Your voice faltered as the door was wrenched open.

You were right. At once, Severus’ eyes narrowed. “It’s you.”

“Er, yes. It’s me.” You raised one hand uncertainly. “Hi.”

“You’re a new assistant professor?”

“Yes.”

Severus lifted his eyebrow in mock surprise. “Well, what do you want from me?”

“Dumbledore said you could help me.”

“With what, exactly?”

“Um… Perhaps I could tell you inside your office?” You would rather not take off your hood in the middle of the hallway, where you could be spotted by a passing student or staff member. Even though, thankfully, Severus’ office, being down in the dungeons, was quite out of the way.

You made to step forward, into Severus’ office, but Severus quickly put his hand up against the doorframe. You yelped when your face ran smack into his arm. Ow…

“I don’t see the need for that,” Severus said coolly. “We can speak as we are.”

“But - ”

“I believe this is my office.” Severus’s voice curled up in distaste.

Fully intending to insult him for giving you such a difficult time, you started to say indignantly, “I see you haven’t changed. You’re still a complete - ” when suddenly, you felt an icy thrill shiver all down your spine. A strange sound came out of your mouth as you suddenly shivered all over.

“What -?” Severus began to question, when another chill ran through your body, and you accidentally shook your head, shaking your hood right off your head. Severus’ eyes widened in astonishment as he caught sight of your silver hair and fox ears.

“What in the world -?” he began.

Realizing that your appearance was exposed, you hurriedly shoved Severus back into his office.

“Oof,” Severus groaned as he felt you rather roughly push him back. He barely managed to keep from tripping backwards over his own doorway. You followed him in, nearly tripping over him just as he almost tripped over his doorway. With everything descending so quickly into chaos, it was small wonder that Severus ended up being backed up against the side of his desk, with you tumbling forward into his chest. A muffled cry left your mouth as your nose, for the second time that day, met some hard, unwelcoming part of his body – his chest.

Severus hurriedly shoved you off of him.

You straightened up and rubbed your nose, frowning at him. “Thought you’d be softer,” you mumbled. “Don’t you just sit around and concoct Potions all day? How much of a work-out is that, really?”

Severus glared at you. Then, without warning, he raised his wand. You scampered away from him, looking rather more like a fox than even you noticed. But he merely pointed his wand at the door, which slammed shut.

“So, all of the teasing about you was right after all – you are quite strange,” Severus remarked, staring at your fox ears.

You bristled at this. “You, of all people, should know that what bullies say is never true.”

Severus paused. “Why do you assume that I would know that?”

“What, do you want to pretend as though you were never bullied while at Hogwarts?” you asked, unimpressed. “People made fun of you as much as they did me. Remember the Marauders and how they -?”

Severus suddenly paled. “I don’t want to hear you mention them again,” he interrupted curtly.

“You brought it up first,” you pushed back. “Besides, my whole point is that those remarks aren’t true. I’m not a freak, and you’re not er – what did they call you? A loner, greasy-haired, hook-nosed – and oh, yes, Snivellus was a popular nickname,” you reeled off, counting on your fingers.

“I’ll thank you not to repeat those words,” Severus said thinly, glowering at you.

“You’re brilliant, Severus, and – well, I wouldn’t call you kind – but at least you were more mature than the rest of the idiots our year,” you continued, dropping your hand.

Severus stared at you for a long moment. Then, in a quiet and distrusting voice, he said, “You don’t know anything about me.”

“Well, not much,” you admitted. “I’m not claiming that we were the best of pals or anything.”

Severus grimaced, and he began to turn away from you, when you spoke again. “But I do know that when Slughorn made me grade papers in detention, yours was always the model answer. And I do know when – when I was caught in that net and everyone was laughing, even though I was thrashing about and could barely breathe and was scared something was really going to happen to me…” Your voice trailed off for a moment, but you pulled yourself together and continued, “I saw you, and you weren’t laughing at me. I don’t know why you weren’t laughing. And it’s not like you helped me, either. But…” Your voice became smaller and smaller, until you were barely whispering, “… And I never laughed at you, either. You didn’t deserve to be bullied.”

Severus turned around, though his expression was still unreadable. His eyes were as cold and calm as ever. “So, what do you suggest? An alliance based on the fact that we were both loners at school? No, thank you.”

“Severus,” you pleaded, “I can’t go anywhere with these - ” you pointed to your fox ears “ - sticking out of my head.”

“What in the world has happened to give you this – this unearthly look?” Severus asked you, examining you with distaste.

Oho. The Nine-Tailed Fox’s voice suddenly popped up in your mind. He wants to know about me, does he? Well, well… You felt her many tails flicker teasingly in your chest. Shall we give him a little introduction?

A sense of tremendous horror overcame you as you suddenly realized what the chills had been – the Nine-Tailed Fox recognizing a connection between you and –

“Oh no,” you suddenly blurted out. “Oh, Merlin, no!”

Severus, who had just started to step towards you to have a closer look at your ears, suddenly came to a stop, as you hastened back, away from him.

“What?” Severus said, startled. “What is it?”

You’ve got to be joking, you told the Fox in your head.

Not at all, the Fox replied. He’s the first in several months now that has held any hint of sexual connection with you. It’s quite weak, I grant you that. But this is where I come in.

But – But it’s him. Severus Snape, you protested. Even as you protested with the Fox, however, a soft burn began to blossom in your heart and slowly began to travel to your cheeks, making you blush, and then down towards your tummy…

“No,” you moaned, and you hid your face in your hands. “No way!”

The Fox giggled, as delightfully and childishly as you had ever heard her. Oh please, this will be fun. It’ll be a bit of a challenge, which is nice, because I rather miss hunting my prey. And with Tristan, you were so into him, little one, that I barely had to stretch my paws to bring him to us.

What? Caught off guard by the Fox’s declaration of how taken in you had been by Tristan, you found yourself sputtering in your head.

Now, this man likes for you to take control – at least, at first, the Fox whispered to you. Be bold before him – and charming, always charming. But not coy. He’ll hate that. I can tell. He’s not one for pretenses.

How can you tell? you wondered warily, staring most unhappily at Severus.

Severus frowned back at you. Folding his arms over his chest, he said, “If you mean to glare at me for much longer, you had better leave. Whether it’s Dumbledore’s order or not, I won’t be granting you any favors when you’re giving me such a distasteful look...”

Severus’ voice died in his chest as you suddenly, lithe as a little fox, jumped forward on your feet and danced your way over to him, with your long silver hair swishing mesmerizingly behind you.

Severus immediately stepped back from you. You stuttered to a stop, too, your fingers coming to a halt in the air just before his chest.

You both froze, looking at each other with utmost confusion and distrust. Severus reached up and took your wrist in his hand, touching you first, but then, he was the one who whispered, “Stop.”

Your eyes flickered up to his, calling him out wordlessly for the discrepancy between his actions and his words. Severus stiffened, his hand tightening into a verifiable grip as he realized that, for once in his life, he was the irrational one.

But then, a strange sensation flickered through him, and Severus’ jaw tightened as an icy cold bolt shot through his hand. He quickly ripped his hand away from you.

Meanwhile, your heart abruptly skipped a beat. It wasn’t a pleasant feeling, not the way it was when it was because Remus was about to touch you and kiss you, but almost as though you had just missed a step on the staircase and was living that horrifying moment where you suddenly thought you might fall.

Severus’ eyes flashed as he realized, “It’s not just the fox ears, is it? It’s something more… Something has… possessed you.”

You paused, startled at how quickly Severus had figured you out. “How did you guess that?”

“Physical symptoms that are uncontrollable are often a sign of internal infection,” Severus explained quickly while still massaging his right hand (which he had held your wrist with) with his left hand, as though he were afraid of being contaminated by whatever had happened when he touched you. “That’s why Potions work so well. Unlike spells, that begin with external influence and often rely on the limits of external perception, Potions work from within.”

“O-Oh,” you said, a bit lamely. You got the gist of what Severus was saying, of course, but the electrifying feeling growing within you, coupled with the unexpected eloquence with which Severus spoke, threw you off guard.

Within you, the Fox put up her paw against your chest and gave you a little shove forward. You felt yourself half-step and half-trip towards Severus.

Severus watched you warily, but he made no move either away or towards you.

“You’re right,” you confessed. “There’s a spirit within me.”

“A Fox Spirit?” Severus asked.

You nodded. “And she comes out whenever…” You hesitated. You didn’t want anyone knowing your weakness. So, you quickly amended, without too noticeable of a pause, “… whenever she’s hungry.”

“Hungry? What do spirits eat?” Severus suddenly put up his right hand to stop you, for you had been slowly coming closer and closer to him.

“Well…” You reached out - though, ignoring his outstretched hand, you chose rather to let your fingertips brush across Severus’ left hand, which was still down and resting. Your fingertips grazed over the back of his hand. The Fox, who was sensing Severus’ deep mistrust of you, was quietly communicating through your hesitant and decidedly gentle touch that you weren’t a threat, that you weren’t intending to take him off guard. Your eyes dropped to his hand, as you gently let your fingertips stroke the back of his hand now. “They crave sensual energy.”

The Fox nudged you, and you instinctively lifted your eyes. Gazing up at him, you very slowly slid your hand into his. “Surely, you can figure it out from there,” you murmured. “Surely, you…” You gave his hand a light squeeze. “… know what I mean.”

Severus’ frown only deepened, however, and he all but grimaced at you as he turned his head away. He began to take his hand out of yours as well, when he paused. You inhaled sharply, too, as you felt the Fox wave her tails behind her in a flurry.

Severus blinked, as a sensation of what could only be described as power flashed through his veins. What in Merlin’s name was that? He wondered. He found himself turning back to stare at you with incredulity. Who is this silly girl, to hold the power of such illusion?

Because if I’m not mistaken, in that single moment, I saw… I saw… Severus was speechless, even in his own brilliant mind, because, in fact, he had seen an alternate version of his own life, of an entire life, where he had not been bullied, where he had been loved as himself, where he had not allowed the Death Eaters to tempt him into joining their cause, where he had not inadvertently gave news of the prophecy to the Dark Lord that had ended up, much to his utter agony, leading to the death of the only one for whom he had ever cared for, ever had feelings for…

Severus shut his eyes. He let out a gasp of emotion, and he nearly collapsed onto the desk behind him.

You raced forward and caught him. “Severus!”

Severus shook his head. “How did you know?” he asked you, overcome with grief. “How did you know what it was that I most desired?”

“I… I don’t,” you replied honestly, still helping to hold him up, with your arms around him. “I don’t know what just happened. I just felt a flash go through me, like – like lightning from a clear sky…”

Severus finally opened his eyes. He put his hand on your shoulder for support as he found his footing again. “Are you sure it’s not some devil spirit that’s possessed you? To be able to conjure up something like that.”

“You know, I’m not so sure myself sometimes,” you replied honestly.

The Nine-Tailed Fox let out a derisive scoff inside of you. Excuse you.

“I don’t trust you,” Severus said, rather suddenly and very bluntly. “I don’t trust what you are, not when you’ve got those – those things on your head and when you’ve seen into my head, when not even - ”

Severus abruptly stopped talking.

You shook your head. “I really didn’t see anything,” you told him earnestly. “Severus, I would never do that to you.”

“Then, what was that?” Severus asked. He grabbed your shoulders.

Startled, your hands flew up to his arms.

Severus didn’t shake you or hurt you in any way, but he kept you before him as he asked you, with a sharp edge in his voice that demanded answers, “There must be some power or motivation that caused me to – to see the things I did. Why? Where did that come from?”

“Severus, please, calm down,” you told him, squirming a little in his grip. Merlin, he’s definitely stronger than he looks.

My, my, isn’t he a sensitive one? The Fox sighed. At first glance, he seems quite strong, but… He’s never tapped into his potential, it seems. Then, her voice radiated outwards, as the Fox whispered to Severus, You have so many regrets, don’t you?

Severus froze. “That voice…”

You nodded calmly. “Yes, it’s her. It’s not me, obviously.”

Severus stared at you, his dark eyes glimmering with complete shock, as he croaked, “It’s real. Those ridiculous tales you used to torture Rowan Scamander with – they’re real.”

“I did not torture him,” you started to seethe, but you reigned yourself in. With a puff of angry air, you calmed yourself and instead said, “Anyways, that’s not the point. The point is that this spirit is very real, and her hunger is also very real. What’s more, satiating her is the only way for me to get rid of those blasted ears - ”

Hey, the Fox interjected in your head, they’re cute on you.

“ – so please, help me,” you finished, pleading with Severus. “Dumbledore said you could make me a Potion that could disguise my features. Some variation of the Polyjuice Potion.”

Severus finally seemed to find his footing again, now that the talk was back to Potions, though there was still a somewhat faint color to his complexion. “Well, yes,” he agreed. “A Disguising Potion would help you.”

He walked around his desk and began to pull out his cauldron, when he paused. “Wait, I thought you said that the Fox spirit craved, - er – a certain energy. A Disguising Potion won’t help with that.”

“Well, no, but the Potion will help conceal the appearance of the Fox,” you replied. “To actually get rid of my fox ears and silver hair without any magic, it requires, um, that certain energy.”

“Oh.” Severus shook his head as he began to set up the different flasks and measuring tools. “Well, then. You should come back in two weeks’ time.”

Your eyes widened. “Two weeks!? I can’t go around looking like this for two weeks! I have to go see Hagrid tomorrow morning!”

Severus shot you a glare. “Well, what do you expect? A full-blown Polyjuice Potion takes an entire month to concoct. And if you were asking anyone but me, a Disguising Potion would take three weeks!”

“Oh my God,” you groaned. “What am I going to do?” You buried your face in your hands. “I can’t let any more people know about my condition! It’s bad enough that you know.”

Oh? The Fox suddenly lifted her snout and sniffed the air. Then, blinking her silver eyes open, she realized, Well, look at that, doing just fine on your own. I think he’s starting to feel a little bit of sympathy for you.

What? you said, confused.

The Fox chuckled. Never mind. Just keep pretending to be upset.

I’m not pretending – I am upset!

While you were busy arguing with the Fox in your head, Severus had slowly stood up at his desk. Many conflicting thoughts were warring in his head: The image of himself as someone powerful and brave was intoxicating to him, and it had felt so real when he had touched you… The fact that Dumbledore had asked him to help you… The fact that nothing good could come out of others knowing that you were possessed by a powerful spirit… And then, the faint image of you, waving at him uncertainly in Transfiguration class, only for him to turn away from you.

Severus didn’t know why he had turned away from you back then. Perhaps it was because he didn’t want to be associated with another “loser.” Perhaps it was because he, too, found you strange, forever running about with irrelevant books and sporting that stupid fox tail keychain. Or perhaps, it was because all his life, whenever he had tried to love someone, whether it was his parents or Lily or even those he attempted to be friends with in his Slytherin circle, he had been betrayed, until his habit to friendliness was immediately turning away, so that he would not have his trust thrown back in his face again…

Severus hadn’t necessarily regretted turning away from you, then. He hadn’t thought about it again because he had always thought that you were rather weird and quirky and unlikable, with too much chaotic energy and what seemed like a totally fantastical and random chase after some mythical creature that Severus thought remained better undiscovered. But now, of all the memories he could have had, it was that flash of memory of you waving at him, which he had never thought about before now, that entered his mind.

Severus hesitated. “You’re certain that you can’t get rid of those fox ears on your own?”

You gave him a wry look. “You really think I would be here, telling you all this, if I could have figured this out on my own?”

“Fine,” Severus acceded. “And Dumbledore truly asked me to help you?”

You nodded firmly, so much so that your left fox ear flopped over, only to flop back up when you straightened your head again.

Severus sighed. “Damn you.” He came around his desk and crossed over to you.

You were busy berating him, “You know, Severus, this is hardly my first choice as to how I spend my time - ”

You cut off, and a muffled whimper of shock left your mouth, as Severus had walked right up to you, slid his hand under your chin, pushed your face up, and then, bending down a little, pressed his mouth against yours.

Surprised, you immediately pushed him off of you. “W-What?” you managed to bleat out in surprise.

“What?” Severus shot right back at you, not taking well to your unwelcoming response. “I am trying to help you,” he snarled.

“But it – you gave me no warning – and, besides that, Severus - ” Without thinking, you blurted out, “ - you kiss so badly!”

Severus turned pale with anger at your insult, but then, you swore a pink tinge appeared on his cheeks a moment later.

“Well,” Severus replied snarkily a moment later, when he had a chance to gather his wits again, “you hardly inspire romanticism.”

Oh God, you groaned in your head. This is terrible. This is so bloody awkward.

You stupid Fox, you cursed in your head. Damn you for needing this.

The Fox delicately wrapped her tails around herself and snuggled into her own warm makeshift blanket. Suit yourself, but I suggest that you carry on, she said haughtily. Elsewise, you’ll only become more desperate.

With a hard, heavy sigh, you finally turned to Severus. “All right, I – I take your point. I didn’t mean to react that way, or to insult you when you’re only helping me. But, um, you can’t – I mean, you shouldn’t kiss that way…”

Severus looked as though he was about to murder you on the spot, or else murder himself.

“Look, I’ll just show you, all right?” you said, feeling the humiliation wash over you at the terribly forced nature of all of this. “I’m warning you that I’m about to kiss you. So, don’t push me away or anything, okay?”

“Your kisses warrant a warning?” Severus said thinly. “And I rather think it’s you that needs to control yourself.”

“Right, right,” you replied quickly, trying not to get dragged into another argument with Severus. “Just… close your eyes, please.”

“I will if you stop talking,” Severus replied coldly.

“Fine,” you responded, equally coldly. “Fine. Just don’t look at me.”

Severus seemed nervous, almost, but he finally did as you asked and closed his eyes.

You walked over to him. You weren’t quite sure where to put your hands and your hands flitted about his chest and arms uncertainly, until Severus barked out, annoyed, “What the hell are you doing? What’s taking so long?”

Just go for it, you told yourself.

With a soft sigh, you found your resolve. You put your hands on his shoulders and then, getting up on tip-toe, you gently pressed your lips to Severus’ mouth.

For a moment, it was just as awkward as before, as he didn’t respond to you at all.

Shall I give you a little help? The Fox purred. She got up from her napping position, and her tails flickered in the air behind her.

Giving in to the feeling of the Fox’s energy, you followed her nudges and closed your own eyes now. You began to slowly open your mouth a little and pressed yours lips against his again before pulling back a little. You paused. Then, you kissed him again, making the same movement as before in opening your lips just a little to let him feel the warm movement of your lips, softly encouraging him to join you.

Severus seemed unsure of what to do, even with your guidance, but eventually, he started to respond, opening his mouth just a little, to let you sink into him. His chest, too, began to soften, as he relaxed the tiniest bit, and his hands began to slide little by little up your back, until he was gently pressing you to him. It surprised you how gentle he was being with you, but you recognized that it was a gentleness borne of uncertainty, rather than out of any care for you.

Maybe he hasn’t much experience, you thought. I suppose that makes sense, since he’s got such a taciturn and cold personality.

You insulting him doesn’t help, the Fox berated you. Stop judging the man, and be thankful that he wants to help you.

At the same time the Fox was chiding you, she was slowly feeding Severus the same sense of power as before – that sense of confidence and certainty that Severus had felt himself to be lacking all his life.

Only a few minutes had passed, when Severus, willingly intoxicated by that vision of himself as a stronger man than he had ever been able to attain in his real life, had, without realizing it himself, pushed you up against the office door with a quiet, yet smoldering confidence that was growing within his soul.

More than a bit surprised at the sudden authority with which Severus kissed you and held you, you blinked your eyes open – only to find that you were looking at none other than Severus Snape.

Goodness, you thought to yourself, this is quite unfortunate, isn’t it? Not that he’s a bad man or anything. Still, it’s unfortunate, you decided, that this is who I have to rely on…

Yes, most unfortunate that you should have to rely on Severus Snape for – for this, you were still thinking five minutes later, though rather hazily now, as Severus’ cruel, hard mouth was on yours, in a harsh and dispassionate kiss, while his hands had snaked around your wrists and pinned you down rather uncaringly against the closed office door.

When Severus abruptly gave you a rather harsh bite on your lower lip, you jolted a little.

“If we’re to do this, I beg you to stay still,” he hissed at you. “The way you squirm at the slightest touch is highly irritating.”

You blew out a sharp breath, annoyed. “What? You want to kiss a stone statue, then?”

“I would rather not ‘kiss’ at all,” Severus growled. “But that damned Fox within you is playing her tricks on me.”

“Don’t blame her,” you shot back. “You agreed to do this.”

“Was there truly any choice? Isn’t that Fox a mythical being?” Severus asked you cuttingly, for he still believed that you knew what the Fox was doing – seeing into his mind and intertwining visions of his deepest desires with being with you. Actually, just as with Tristan, you didn’t know was happening. You didn’t automatically know what the Fox saw in your partner’s mind and you weren’t always aware of how the Fox was affecting the visions of your partner, or even how the Fox heightened the atmosphere between the two of you. That was why even you, who housed the Nine-Tailed Fox within you, continued to underestimate her.

But before you could make sense of his words, Severus warned you, “Now, stay still.” With that, he kissed you again, and then, he roughly yanked your robes aside and plunged his hand into your boyshorts and then –

It surprised you just how thick Severus’ fingers were. It was quite unlike being touched by Remus, with his long, graceful fingers. Besides that, Remus had liked to lead into it, to give you soft little pats and rubs before starting to push, whereas Severus was purposeful from the very beginning, pushing his fingers hard against your core at once and continuing to push and push and push –

“Hah… Ah…” You shut your eyes tightly. “You’re p-pushing - ”

“Shush.”

The Fox within you bounded around happily. Mm, he’s stern, isn’t he?

“Ah, S-Severus,” you stuttered out.

“I told you to stop with your ridiculous sounds.”

“I’m – huff – trying.”

“No wonder a Fox spirit could possess you,” Severus said meanly. “You have no will of your own, no you?”

“S-Shut up,” you whispered back, in a tight voice. A moan very nearly slipped out, but you caught yourself just in time. Biting down hard on your lower lip, you restrained yourself from making any noise beyond your desperate pants and sharp inhales.

Come now, the Fox whispered to you slyly, give him a little moan.

No, he said he finds it annoying when I moan.

He’s lying, you silly girl, the Fox said knowingly. Now, open your mouth and moan. The Fox put up her paw and pushed at your chest.

You instantly breathed out, “Ah… S-Slow down.”

Severus paused. “Why? Am I hurting you?”

“No, it’s not that. It just feels better if you go slow.”

At this, Severus merely said, “I’d rather we get this over with.”

“But, it doesn’t feel as good,” you protested again.

Severus ignored you, continuing to rub your little clit until it was blushing pink.

Nngh… So rough, you thought. All the men I’ve ever been with are so rough… except Remus. He was the only one who was gentle with me.

The Fox hissed at you. Get your act together.

Before you could retort to the Fox, Severus stepped closer to you, and pushing you up against the door, he slid his hand over your pussy, cupping it, and then rubbed his palm right where you were most sensitive on your clit.

“Ah, w-wait!” you cried out suddenly, clutching onto Severus’ arm.

“Wait for what?” Severus muttered at you, but he didn’t slow down one bit, as the expression on your face told him that you weren’t stopping him because you were hurting, but rather because you were… About to cum, Severus recognized, watching you bit down on your lower lip and then pant desperately.

“You’re s’pse to lead in,” you whispered. “Not so fast! I – ah!”

“You don’t really seem to mind, though,” Severus said wryly.

“No, if you keep going, I’m – I’m – ah!” you gasped out. He’s relentless. The way he touches me, just pushing his fingers all over my pussy, pressing down regardless of how out of breath I am, regardless of – of everything… Oh, God…

You shut your eyes tightly and huffed out hard breaths, one after the other. At first, because of how rough he was, it didn’t feel all that good. But, now, I feel like, with all this pressure on my clit, building up so quickly because of all the rubbing and touching and pushing, I have to cum. I have to!

“Nngh, God, S-Severus,” you stuttered out. “Fuck, I think ‘m gonna – ah- c-cum…!” Your back arched off of the door, and you moaned loudly.

Severus felt your thighs tremble, but he kept his hand pressed right up against you, not letting you close your thighs together. “Be still,” he warned you, ignoring the fact that you were cumming so hard that you were disintegrating before his very eyes. “I’ll stop if you aren’t still.”

“So… harsh,” you bleated out, almost whimpering, as Severus made you keep your thighs apart. “When I can’t even help it, can’t help myself…”

“I don’t care. You keep those thighs spread,” Severus snapped. But even he could not stop the inevitable. Your moan curled up as your thighs bowed together around his unyielding hand, and you ended up grasping onto Severus and leaning forward and panting into his chest as you tried to hold yourself up and keep from falling.

“Look at you, barely holding yourself together,” Severus sneered. “Pathetic.” Of course, the hard throbbing in his pants told him otherwise, but he would rather die than let you know how badly you were affecting him as you smushed your face against his chest and whimpered.

Unable to help himself, Severus suddenly pushed his hand against you once more, wanting to feel your cum pool into his hand. Meaning to tease you, Severus whispered into your ear, rather meanly, “Do you even remember your name at this point?”

However, right as he whispered into your ear, whether it was because of Severus’ suddenly pushing his hand against you, or you unintentionally spreading your thighs open in an attempt to stand up again at that exact moment, or the Fox’s sly wiles at work, Severus’ fingers were suddenly pushing right at your pussyhole. Before you knew it, he was pushing three of his fingers inside of your tight hole – or you were sinking down onto his fingers as your legs gave out – again, you didn’t know which. All the same, his thick fingers were spreading your little pussy open. Your eyes widened in surprise, but Severus, too, was rather caught off guard.

“A-Ah!” you stuttered out, surprised at the sudden feeling of your little pussy being pushed open and filled by a man’s thick, demanding fingers.

Subconsciously, Severus realized that he wanted to hear you speak to him like that again, and, without giving you a moment’s respite, he pushed his fingers into you yet again, even deeper and faster this time.

You held back your moans for as long as you could, as your thighs caved in over and over again, until - “Severus, please!” you abruptly cried out.

Severus’ breath caught for just a moment when he heard you cry out his name like that. He paused to stare at you, somewhat in awe at the gorgeous little sounds you were making. Even when he finally acquiesced to touching you, he had never, for a second, imagined that he would actually enjoy it on any level, except to feed into the power that the Fox was feeding him. But seeing you like this, melting against the door and right onto his hand, almost subconsciously lusting after him, but conscious enough to be moving your little hips up and down, swaying on his hand to take in more and more of his fingers into your tight hole, Severus suddenly found himself hard-pressed not to praise you.

“Oh my God,” you whimpered just then, relieved that he was finally pausing. You couldn’t help except to slump forward and to pant heavily against his chest, while your trembling thighs and your tight, tight pussy finally relaxed enough that the cum started to trickle out of you.

Severus’ chest began to heave slightly faster under his dark shirt, as he realized how wonderfully warm and wet you were getting between your thighs.

Meanwhile, you were lost in your own cloud of confusion over the pleasure that Severus, of all people - the one man who it was unthinkable to be intimate with - was giving you. Why does it have to feel so good? you wondered hazily. Fills me up so good, doesn’t he? Yes, and with just his fingers. Ah… Ah, God, and I just came, so I’m all – all wet, and he’s spreading me open now, and I – I think I’m d-dripping… Mmm, fuck!

Severus paused, feeling your cum, all warm and slick, starting to pool out of your tight pussy. “You’re impossibly wet,” Severus murmured, almost beratingly. But his fingers were still slowly pushing into your slick, yet squeezing little warmth.

“Then, s-stop,” you mumbled out. “If you keep touching me, I’m only going to get w-wetter.”

Severus stopped at once, out of pride. But he felt a flash of regret as he pulled his fingers out of your silky little hole. He meant to pull his hand away entirely, only just then, he felt your soft thighs latch around his wrist. Without realizing that you were keeping him with you, you began to move moving your hips back and forth just a little, soothing yourself while coming down from your high. “Mm,” you mumbled out softly.

This was how, despite all of your back-and-forth to stop touching each other, Severus’ hand was now growing steadily wetter with your cum. A part of him felt disgusted, and he wanted to pull his hand away at once, except you were clutching onto him and burying your face against him, and glimpsing down, Severus could once more see the way your hips softly shifted from side to side. Something about that vision, of you moving your hips like that, did something inexplicable to Severus. It made him swallow hard and it made him painfully aware of his cock straining against his pants.

Despite himself, Severus wanted to feel more of you, to touch you, to push every delicious moan out of you. And what was more, Severus couldn’t help thinking about what it must feel like to have his cock – his hard, throbbing cock, which was uncomfortably tight in his pants – inside of this tight little cunt of yours.

Outwardly, Severus only sighed, as though bored. “I thought you just told me to stop touching you. What do you think you’re doing now, then, using my hand like this?”

“Oh!” Your eyes flashed open. You hurriedly stepped back, letting Severus’s hand slide out from your soft, warm thighs.

Severus lifted his hand, only to find it drenched in your cum. He grimaced, though he let you still lean against him as you caught your breath. “Is your Fox satisfied now?” Severus asked you, rather condescendingly.

The Fox laughed lightly in your head. As if. Silly human. Still, he’s a lucky find. His soul is quite strong, if not a little brittle from being caged up so long.

But Severus’ comment woke you up. Letting go of him, you fell back against the door, still trying to catch your breath.

Severus watched as your white fox ears slowly disappeared. Back into her head? Or where do they go? he found himself wondering. Then, your silver hair turned back to your shoulder-length blue hair.

Anyways…

“You’re back to normal,” Severus said. Then, he added meanly, “Or, as normal as you ever look.”

You scowled at Severus, but he didn’t care. He was too busy shoving you out of his office.

“Next time,” he scolded you, “wait for the Potion.”

With that, Severus closed the door on you.

You sighed as you walked away from Severus’ office, rearranging your robes to hide the fact that Severus Severus, of all people, had made you cum against his hand. And when his fingers were inside of you – oooh, it made you melt just thinking about it. You still preferred Remus’ gentle, slender fingers touching you so sweetly and driving you absolutely crazy with want before finally pushing into you, but the thickness of Severus’ fingers and the immediate roughness with which he touched you, while it didn’t feel perfectly pleasant at first, did make you feel quite… quite full, one might even say satisfied, rather quickly. You nearly moaned in your head as you imagined how it might feel to have his fingers pumping into you a lot harder than he had given you today, but – Oh my God. What’s happening to me? you wondered, suddenly catching yourself. I must be crazy, imagining Severus like that.

Honestly, of all the people I thought I’d be asking favors for, you complained in your head. And this kind-of favor, too. Merlin. He must despise me, on some level.

The Fox let out a sparkling laugh, as she replied, Oh no, don’t worry about that. You’ve more than repaid the favor for that man. He’ll welcome you back anytime with open hands – or should I say, with his thick fingers.

Shut up, you growled at the Fox. I’m embarrassed myself today thanks to you.

The Fox smirked at you. She can’t even begin to imagine how much that man wants her now, the Fox thought to herself.

For, unbeknownst to you, in his office, Severus had barely managed to shove you out the door and then unbuckle his pants fast enough before cum spurted out of his hard, thick cock. The truth was, he’d barely been able to hold back from cumming as he watched you cum for him. He’d held his breath as he took in the sight of you trembling all prettily against the door, with your eyes staring up at him in wide wonder at the desperate need for release that was working through your little tummy and deep inside of your tight, squeezing cunt. Now picturing your face in his mind, including the way your little fox ears had been twitching furiously on the top of your head as you literally soaked his fingers with cum, Severus finally let himself cum heavily into his hand. Groaning and leaning over his desk, Severus barely managed to grip onto the edge of his desk with one hand, as with his other hand, he finished pumping his cock in his hand, allowing himself to cum to the image of you still in his head.

Severus had no ideations of you, of course. He knew full well that it was the Fox who was working her magic onto him, but still, when he finally opened his eyes to see his office completely covered with snow for a moment, he was completely taken aback. What kind-of magic is this? he wondered, unsettled. But he only had to blink again, and the snow was gone, with not a single snowflake left behind. Severus was left wondering if all of this had just been a dream – a strange dream of you fantastically conjured up from that one memory of you where you were waving to him, with a certain sadness in your eyes and a shy kindness in your smile, and even then, some strange form of mysticism that had wrapped around you like a cloak and made you seem, even back then, like a being not from this world, a being that none of the other students could even dare to touch, let alone understand.

If Lily Evans had once been his anchor to a kinder and brighter world, one that Severus had too quickly lost hold of in his shame at the constant humiliation he faced at Hogwarts, combined with his deep desire to impress her by fulfilling his more ambitious instincts and joining the Death Eaters, you were the exact opposite of Lily to him – not some anchor to a brighter world; rather, a loner just like him, awkward and incapable of small talk, someone floating and uncertain, clearly not destined for greatness in the world, and yet, highly ambitious in your own way, someone who understood that deep, haunting thirst to prove yourself to the rest of the world that constantly doubted you, and had felt the unbearable pain of having that very ambition become the thing that reared up and bit you, betrayed you, right when you needed it most. Ambition, Severus decided, was a double-headed snake, and both of you had fallen prey to your own dreams.

While Severus did not trust you whatsoever, with your strange fox ears and even stranger personality, it was that aspect of shared experience, of trying and being betrayed and hurting, all in the pursuit of one glorious dream, that allowed Severus to feel the slightest bit of sympathy for you. But Severus Snape, like Tristan Graves, like you, failed to understand how clever the Nine-Tailed Fox was, and neither you nor he could even come close to imagining just how perfectly the Fox would use that tiny bit of shared experience to bind the two of you together over the next twelve years.

Tagged Users: @areomalfoy

#fanfic #fanfiction #harry potter smut #harry potter imagine #marauders #marauders era #severus snape #severus snape smut #severus snape x reader #foxtail and wolfsbane

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