#because they believed that was the only way to signify that they are strong
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Concept: Fire Lords traditionally dress like the stages of the sun to match their reign.
When Zuko is first crowned, he dresses in the colours of dawn. Bright yellows and pinks and even purples. He starts to wear more traditional crimson-and-gold robes after a few years, the colours of midday when Agni is at his strongest. And towards the end of his reign, when he's getting ready to pass the crown onto Izumi, he starts dressing like the setting sun.
#i haven't been able to stop thinking about this for DAYS please free me#avatar#atla#i imagine this was something that went out of style with sozin's era#because fire lords refused to wear anything but the colours of midday#because they believed that was the only way to signify that they are strong#anyway i'm just losing my mind at teenage fire lord zuko dressed like the rising sun#my posts#atla headcanons#au ideas
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EX HUSBAND WRIOTHESLEY
— ꒰ synopsis ꒱ — ex! husband wriothesley headcanons
— ꒰ warnings ꒱ — [ex]plicit, fem! reader, reader is referred to as "wife", a little sad, unprotected syx, hitting it raw, very rough fucking lmao, love sick & feral wriothesley, very messy too
ex! husband wriothesley who will hesitantly accept your upsetting decision to file for divorce, and to nullify your earnest promise— nonetheless, it's evident that it was crushing him through the very inside, the pain your words caused had invited him to explore the enormity of sorrow. however, do not be fooled because he won't show it to you, meaning his pure and real emotions, instead wriothesley will decide to verbally jester around about the current happening to brighten up an otherwise daunting interaction between two past lovers.
it was to no avail, the agony festering on his facial expressions and there was nothing in his life worth remembering other than you and a concealed shade of his past— yet, the last thing he'd want to happen was to lose you entirely, signifying that if he was to put his foot down and tell you that he doesn't want the divorce to happen, it probably doesn’t mean much after all.
ex! husband wriothesley who will reminisce about past events in front of you, your first kiss or that one particular date where he asked you to marry him, just small, little details about you that only your ex husband knew of— but, he'll do it in a subtle way, sneakily sprinkling it into a conversation in hopes you'd get a dash of sudden yearning as well— the same he did whenever he casted his mind back towards the good, old days.
ex! husband wriothesley who will speak in riddles to you, keep his quick-witted demeanor in order to fool you into thinking that he was doing quite well after the divorce was fulfilled— and his intentions weren't in wanting to make you feel bad, sorrowful or even jealous. no, not at all. in fact, he thought that if he was to hide his raw emotions and genuine feelings in front of you, you wouldn't feel awful about your decision and were able to continue living a normal life, yet without him.
ex! husband wriothesley who promised you that he will take off the ring that symbolized your once passionate marriage— but will behind your back grab a necklace to loop it inside the precious metal, so he could always wear the ring around his neck, secretly hiding it from your eyes to see while holding on to it whenever he found himself in trouble, or saddened.
ex! husband wriothesley who feels helplessly confused still, harshly drawing back for air as he let a brittle thread of a nervous laughter go when you suddenly ask him if he wanted to remain friends with you, which— in truth, he didn't, and the second after you proposed that insane idea to him he thought you must be joking, or that you surely must've lost your mind (which would make the divorce explainable).
it goes without saying that the real reason as to why the duke didn't seek out to befriend you, had nothing to do with the feelings he harbors towards you suddenly dissolving, it's quite the opposite because he was so helplessly in love with you, archons, he was bloody obsessed with you.
certainly, he thought that such friendship between two past lovers would only cause injury to you both in the end, for the main part to you who he cared the utmost about.
aside from the fact that even now, when he notices how you steadily keep your distance from him, at all times, it breaks him from within.
how cold it was when all ex! husband wriothesley sought after was your gentle caress and delicate kisses, he longed for an opportunity to just swiftly hush you with one step, raw and earnest trapping you against his strong arms while pressing his lips on top of yours when— oh, he does it again, he was indulging in fantasy, gradually yielding to an alternative version of you two ending up together.
in the duke's own words, he believed that love should be warm, a sweet addiction, a magic gifted by the universe, so why— just what had went so terribly wrong that he was struggling to understand it? you should just say you do not care for him, tell him you feel nothing so he can walk away, or maybe, regardless he will stay.
ex! husband wriothesley who despite you both being apart now, remains faithful to you, protective and nurturing to your every needs— because it was simple as that— for the duke, you are his shining sun, and will still remain it to his dying day.
to his crushed and painful body, your caressing trace was his only medication, and your smile? it was the light to his broken heart, for that is what he had called a warm love.
ex! husband wriothesley who noticed how the natural warmth surrounding his body had but faded completely as his mind began to gather around great negativities— perhaps he was flawed and that's the reason you left him all along, cursed to feel the deep sadness slither through his veins like a freezing liquid conquering his body as he shuts himself off for a while, until he can recollect himself again that is.
ex! husband wriothesley who had inappropriate thoughts enter his mind whenever he thought about you— here is to note that he utterly disliked the way his brain just so happened to work and how he wasn't able to shake off those strong and vivid fantasies playing in his mind on repeat.
but how can he not dream about his wife? well, ex-wife, which in his memories was pressed under his large figure exposed with your breasts on full display, his hips working constantly to please you just the way he knew you liked it.
because you see, the duke knew your body, in and out, one might even assume he knows it better than you do. and he still has a couple of your panties left in his drawer— in fact, he wanted to return them, please believe him, but he found himself to be quite busy these past weeks that he must've simple forgotten to do so.
ex! husband wriothesley who at some point, cannot live like this anymore and was desperate to see you again. after your marriage had crushed, you weren't visiting the fortress of meropide anymore and as the duke was rarely leaving it himself, it could've been the perfect situation to move on from each other, yet he simply could not do that, not when you were constantly on his mind.
ex! husband wriothesley who will find courage and leave the fortress to visit you at your new place, in fact, the mere sight of the duke exiting the underworld was rarely seen, so the guards figured that it must be of graven importance— as invisible and weightless as your love for him might be for now, in the middle of the night he walks out to find you, taking in a last view at the fortress before an itching impatience got the better of him.
he just had to see you, now.
ex! husband wriothesley who will show up at your doorstep and suddenly admit that he cannot do this anymore, that he felt incredibly miserable and heartbroken, confessing his undying love and affection towards you, using words he had once spelled out to you the night you had gotten married.
"night and day, i dream of you," wriothesley yells, as if there had been nothing left to his choice, the sight of your glowering eyes and those soft, frowning lips he just misses to kiss.
"and there is not one corner on this world that you could possibly travel to in order to free me from this torture," he adds forbiddingly.
through dark eyelashes, wriothesley stares at sudden tears welling up in your glassy eyes, a sharp amenity invading your cheeks as he places his palms on top of them in order to brush your warm tears away. "you're mine," he said, the corners of his mouth slightly quirking upwards, his hot breathing lingering around your gasping lips, "and not even a divorce can change that."
ex! husband wriothesley who places a delicate splatter of warm and passionate kisses on top of your lips the moment you pull him by the collar of his shirt, his surprised growl turning into a stifled cry when you wrap your arms around his neck in order to keep him close to you, together stumbling into the coziness of your home as one hand was firmly placed against your back, his mouth eagerly parting as your lips welcome the teasing slide of his tongue lapping across your own.
ex! husband wriothesley who will hiss upon revelling in your soft fingers tracing over his twitching muscles when you undress each other, his disheveled hair accentuated with a fond smile as his hands trail down the sides of your face, leaning his hungry lips against yours again, the lingering, familiar scent of your fragrance penetrating his nostrils turning him needier, on the brink of passing out.
ex! husband wriothesley who loves hearing you only reply in soft and crumbled whimpers of his name slipping past the edges of your tongue as he cannot wait to feel you— fuck, and neither can you wait to feel him again, a clashing pressure on your hot core narrowing the space between your bodies as he lines himself up with you, your nails slithering down his chiseled back as he slides into you abruptly, your neglected cunt instantly welcoming him.
and you squeal out in pleasure as he thrusts into you, the maddening scent of his musky perfume persisting around your shivering frame as wriothesley hooks one leg over his shoulder, the squelching sounds of your wet sex echoing throughout the entire bedroom just signalizing how much you must've missed him as well, his addicting gaze always flickering across the way your body reacted to him.
ex! husband wriothesley who shoves himself further into your soft cunt— and you're just so unbelievably cute and adorable at your desperate attempts to silence those candid whines and mewls of his name. one of his hands was now placed on the headboard for additional support as to not suddenly suffocate you with his large body towering above before he increases the pace on your cunt, setting for a deep and fast rhythm that would surely stay engraved in your walls even after he's done.
ex! husband wriothesley who kisses you like a starved animal as your tears tickle the soft features on his face, your hidden emotions running wild at the sheer passion he unlocked in you, his erection throbbing harder as he groans into your lips, triggering every last one of your nerves in your body and infusing them with persisting vibrations— now, you're gasping at the lack of oxygen in your lungs as his constant thrusts into you drove you deeper into the mattress, if that was even possible, considering the fact that your whole body had been caged in between your bed and wriothesley's frame towering on top.
ex! husband wriothesley who chokes back a desperate growl as he sought out further friction, growing feral, then hissing sharply as his sensitive cockhead reaches into your deepest parts, his shaft all the way sucked in by your used pussy lubricating him so he can ram himself in and out of you harder, slick pooling out of your hole whenever he pulls out only to press back inside with one quick snap.
ex! husband wriothesley who worships your body, making you feel every thick vein as it throbs violently against your walls, your thudding hole making him lose his mind on how you're convulsing while he curls into you— your swollen cunt tensing and releasing, grinding up a little as thick, white cum gathers at the base of his cock, his mesmerizing eyes glued on the creamy spot that was showing him just how much you enjoyed this too.
ex! husband wriothesley who resumes his fast tempo, your teeth rattling with every new impact of his hips bouncing against your flesh blanking your mind into pure paradise— your moving bodies couldn't stop anymore as you're fucking each other well over the limits of your endurance, drool dribbling down the corners of your mouth as wriothesley was fucking your cunt desperately, unhinged and making it a point to rock your hips in and out along a particular angle that you'd always squeeze over the rigid veins prancing on the underside of his shaft.
ex! husband wriothesley who exhales heavily when you tell him that you're close, his hips pressing and digging into your sensitivity once more before lifting you off the mattress, chasing your relief like a wild beast that he so graciously wanted to see unfold— low profanities and fast tumbles of his name falling from your lips as your thighs begin to shake and ache, your throat turning dry— you're done for, and wriothesley just fits so perfectly in you, into every curve, every spongy spot and every bump inside that you're so painfully full, crowded and overflowing of his thick shaft.
you're hiccuping due to the pressure he presses into your sensitivity as you're way beyond your own limits now, at last feeling a twitch and quake as your body pleads to cum, his grueling thrusts aiding you when you violently convulse around his length, a sharp intake of breath breaking every other noise in the room when you cum all over his cock, your orgasm hitting you hard, wriothesley continuing with slow, language thrusts until you've rode out your high.
the duke was being eager to watch it all happen, something primal at the back of his mind manifestikg when the sudden constriction of your fluttering hole made him grunt lowly against your ear, rolling his hips nearly painfully hard between your legs before dragging himself away, cumming inside of your walls and marking you up for good with his warm, sticky cum.
ex! husband wriothesley who watched you being short of breath, and couldn’t resist looking at the mess between your legs, your abused cunt twitching around his girth as your pussy flutters around nothing, your legs were quivering with a combination of your essence and his seed oozing out of your hole, staining the silky bedsheets.
ex! husband wriothesley who'll press himself back into you with one sharp snap, leaving his cock in so you could clench and throb, small thrusts turning sloppy and sticky with his dampened bangs glued on his forehead as he kisses the tip of your nose before embracing your pouty lips again, your mouth partly open as you whine out, your sensitivity spiraling of his cock still being nestled in you, his shaft already hard and thick again, your battered cunt jolting underneath him.
wriothesley smiles, "it is maddening, how much you consume my very being, my love." and speaks through his heart.
© 2023 anantaru do not repost, copy, translate, modify
#genshin x reader#genshin impact x reader#genshin smut#genshin impact smut#wriothesley x reader#wriothesley smut#genshin x you#wriothesley x you#genshin impact x you#genshin drabbles#genshin impact drabbles#genshin headcanons#genshin impact headcanons
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Venus in houses
Venus signifies love, beauty, relationships, art, aesthetics, and harmony in astrology. It also represents how we express affection and what we're attracted to.
These post are general and won't resonate 100% because we have to consider other aspects too.
For entertainment purposes only!
Venus in the 1st house
People with Venus in the 1st house tend to be naturally charming and attractive. They have a friendly, approachable vibe that draws others in. People often find them physically appealing, even if they're not aware of it. These individuals have a certain grace and poise about them. They carry themselves with elegance and may have a good sense of fashion and style. They know how to make a positive first impression. Venus represents beauty, and when it's in the 1st house, these folks have a deep appreciation for all things beautiful. They may have a keen interest in art, fashion, or design. Socializing comes naturally to them. They enjoy being around people and are often the life of the party. They make friends easily and can adapt to different social situations with ease. Relationships play a significant role in their lives. They are often focused on creating harmonious and loving connections with others. They may fall in love quickly and enjoy the romantic aspects of life. In conversations, they tend to be diplomatic and tactful. They have a way of saying things that doesn't ruffle feathers, which makes them excellent mediators in conflicts. People with Venus in the 1st house are generally well-liked and popular. They have a magnetic quality that draws others to them, and they can often get what they want through their charm and charisma. Many of them have artistic talents, whether it's in music, visual arts, or any other creative endeavor. They may find joy and fulfillment in expressing themselves artistically. On the downside, they may have a tendency to indulge themselves a bit too much. This could manifest in overeating, overspending, or other forms of self-gratification. They often have strong preferences when it comes to aesthetics. They know what they like and don't like, whether it's in their home decor, clothing, or personal grooming. They value harmony and balance in their lives. Disruptions or conflicts can be particularly distressing for them, and they may go to great lengths to restore peace. Their personal values are very important to them. They are likely to stand up for what they believe in, and they seek partners and friends who share similar values.
Venus in the 2nd house
Having Venus here often means you appreciate the finer things in life. You might have a knack for making money and enjoy spending it on beautiful stuff – whether it's a fancy car, a stylish wardrobe, or a cozy home. You're likely drawn to luxurious and high-quality items. Quality over quantity is your mantra. You'd rather have one exquisite piece than a bunch of cheap stuff. Venus in the 2nd house can bring a touch of charm and grace to your financial dealings. People might find it hard to say no to you when you're asking for a loan or negotiating a deal. Your values play a significant role in your relationships. You're attracted to partners who share your values, especially when it comes to money and possessions. Harmony in these areas is important to you. You tend to be generous with your loved ones, showering them with gifts and treats. It's your way of showing affection. You usually have a good sense of how to manage your money. Financial stability is essential for your peace of mind, and you work to achieve it. Venus also rules beauty and art, so you might have a keen eye for design and aesthetics. You could excel in professions related to art, fashion, or interior decorating.You find pleasure in the sensory experiences of life – good food, beautiful surroundings, and physical comfort. This can also extend to your romantic life, where physical intimacy is essential. if Venus isn't well-aspected here, it could lead to overindulgence in spending or a tendency to be materialistic. Be mindful of not equating your self-worth with your possessions.
Venus in the 3rd house
Venus in the 3rd house blesses you with a silver tongue. You have a natural charm in the way you speak and interact with others. Your words are like sweet melodies, making it easy for you to connect with people on a personal level. You're a great conversationalist and can easily win people over with your pleasant demeanor. Venus is the planet of beauty and creativity, and in the 3rd house, it infuses your communication with a touch of artistry. You may have a talent for writing, public speaking, or storytelling. Your creative ideas flow effortlessly into your conversations, making them engaging and memorable. You're socially adept and thrive on building relationships with those in your immediate environment. This placement often indicates a strong bond with siblings, making you a friendly and supportive sibling or enjoying close relationships with your brothers and sisters. You may also have a knack for forming close friendships with your neighbors or people you encounter in your day-to-day life. Venus in the 3rd house can make you a lifelong learner. You have a curiosity about the world and a love for acquiring knowledge, especially in subjects related to art, culture, and aesthetics. This placement can encourage you to pursue studies or hobbies that involve beauty, such as literature, music, or the visual arts. While you're charming, your interactions with others may sometimes be perceived as flirtatious, even if that's not your intention. You enjoy the playful side of communication and may engage in witty banter or playful teasing. This can make you quite popular and fun to be around. In relationships, you express your affection through words and gestures. Love letters, sweet text messages, and small romantic surprises come naturally to you. You appreciate the beauty of love and use your communication skills to strengthen your romantic connections. Your relationship with siblings tends to be harmonious and supportive. You're there for them when they need you, and you bring a sense of ease and understanding to your family dynamics. The 3rd house also relates to short journeys. With Venus here, you may have a fondness for weekend getaways, road trips, or other short adventures, often with loved ones.
Venus in the 4th house
You find a deep sense of emotional security and comfort within the confines of your home and family. There's a strong need for a harmonious and loving domestic environment. You have a strong attachment to your home and might enjoy decorating and making it aesthetically pleasing. Your home is often a place of comfort, love, and artistic expression. Family plays a significant role in your life. You may have a close and loving relationship with your family members, particularly your mother or maternal figures. You attach sentimental value to family heirlooms, traditions, and memories. Your family's history and heritage are important to you. Your approach to love and relationships is nurturing and caring. You may express love through taking care of your loved ones, especially within the home environment. You seek a harmonious and peaceful home life, and you might go to great lengths to maintain a loving atmosphere. You enjoy entertaining at home and often find happiness in hosting gatherings. Venus in the 4th house can grant a good sense of style and design for home decoration. You may enjoy collecting art, antiques, or items of beauty for your living space. Your early childhood experiences, especially in your family, can strongly influence your attitudes and behaviors in love and relationships as an adult. There can be a strong interest in real estate, and you might invest in properties or find a career related to homes and interior design. Striving for balance and emotional security is crucial for your happiness. You seek relationships that provide a sense of comfort and emotional well-being.
Venus in the 5th house
With Venus in the 5th house, you have a magnetic charm that makes you naturally attractive and romantic. You seek love and pleasure in creative and playful ways. You enjoy the excitement of romance, and your relationships tend to be passionate and full of affection. This placement enhances your artistic and creative abilities. You may have a talent for music, art, or any form of self-expression. You find joy and fulfillment in creative pursuits and often use them as a means of showcasing your love and affection. Your inner child is very much alive, and you enjoy fun and playfulness. You may have a special connection with children and might excel in roles involving teaching or working with young people. Your love life often resembles a romantic fairy tale. You have a love for entertainment, whether it's through the arts, sports, or other leisure activities. You enjoy the finer things in life and are willing to invest in experiences that bring pleasure and luxury. Your charm and charisma are accentuated, making you a natural flirt. You tend to be social and love attention, often becoming the center of attraction in social settings. This can be a positive trait in your love life and personal relationships. You may be more willing to take risks in matters of the heart. This can lead to exciting and passionate relationships, but it may also involve some ups and downs. Love and creativity often go hand in hand for you, and you're not afraid to pursue your passions. If you become a parent, your love for children will shine through. You're likely to be a warm, affectionate, and creative parent who encourages your children to explore their own creative talents. Venus in the 5th house can bring out your dramatic side. You enjoy being in the spotlight and expressing yourself with flair, whether on stage or in everyday life. You may have a wide range of hobbies and interests that allow you to express your creativity and love. Your interests can become a big part of your identity and how you attract and connect with others.
Venus in the 6th house
You have a natural flair for bringing beauty and creativity into your job. You tend to enjoy work that involves art, aesthetics, or social interactions. You are likely to be diplomatic and pleasant in your interactions with colleagues and clients, making you a valuable team member. Venus in the 6th house often bestows good physical health. You are inclined to take care of your body and may be drawn to activities like yoga or other forms of exercise that are not only beneficial but enjoyable too.You are charming and diplomatic in your interactions with co-workers. This can create a harmonious work environment, but be cautious of overindulgence in office gossip or drama This placement can signify a love for helping others. You may be drawn to careers in healthcare, social work, or any field that involves assisting and nurturing people. You have a strong need for beauty and aesthetics in your daily life. You might decorate your workspace, have a well-organized and visually pleasing schedule, and appreciate the finer things in your daily routines. Your creative talents can be expressed through your work. You may find ways to infuse artistry into even the most mundane tasks, making your daily routines more enjoyable and fulfilling.Be cautious about romantic involvements in the workplace, as Venus in the 6th house can lead to romantic attractions with colleagues. It's essential to maintain professionalism in such situations. You may struggle to find a balance between work and personal life, as you can become so absorbed in your job or daily tasks that you forget to take breaks for self-care and enjoyment.
Venus in the 7th house
Venus in the 7th house indicates a deep need for harmonious relationships. You are drawn to partners who are attractive, charming, and cultured. You seek equilibrium and balance in your partnerships and may avoid conflict whenever possible. You have a natural ability to attract people and form meaningful connections. You may be seen as diplomatic, charming, and well-liked in social situations. Your charisma can be a significant asset in your personal and professional life.This placement often signifies a strong desire for committed and long-lasting partnerships. You are likely to value the institution of marriage and may dream of a fairy-tale romance. Venus in the 7th house can enhance your artistic and creative talents, as the 7th house represents partnerships, and Venus is the planet of aesthetics. You might find artistic expression through collaboration or partnerships. You have a refined sense of beauty and may be drawn to artistic or visually appealing partners. You appreciate art, fashion, and all things aesthetically pleasing. In your relationships, you tend to be diplomatic and value compromise. You may go to great lengths to maintain peace and harmony, sometimes at the cost of expressing your true feelings. This placement can influence not only your personal relationships but also your business partnerships. You're likely to have a good sense of business and can form lucrative partnerships, particularly in ventures related to beauty, art, or design. While Venus in the 7th house brings a lot of positive attributes, there can be challenges too. You may struggle with being overly dependent on your partner for emotional well-being, and at times, you might fear being alone. People with Venus in the 7th house often attract love into their lives. However, the challenge lies in maintaining that love over the long term, as you may idealize your partners. Your ability to negotiate and find common ground with others is a significant strength. You're skilled at resolving conflicts peacefully.
Venus in the 8th house
You possess an intense and deep emotional nature. Your feelings are not superficial; they run profound and can often be veiled, even to yourself. In your romantic relationships, you seek deep, passionate, and transformative connections. You're drawn to intense, soulful bonds with your partners. Your desires and pleasures are deeply rooted in the physical realm. Sensuality plays a significant role in your life, and you may have strong sexual appetites. The 8th house is also associated with shared resources and joint finances. You may have financial dealings with others, such as business partnerships or shared assets with a spouse. Venus in the 8th house can give you a magnetic and alluring presence. People may be naturally drawn to you because of your intense charm and charisma. You are inclined towards personal transformation and growth. You're not afraid to confront the darker aspects of life and explore the mysteries of the human psyche. You take your relationships seriously and are willing to invest a lot of emotional energy into them. Loyalty is crucial to you, and you may have a tendency to hold onto relationships longer than most. Financially, you may experience highs and lows. Joint financial matters can be a source of both gain and loss. It's essential to be cautious in financial partnerships. The 8th house is associated with the occult, mysteries, and hidden knowledge. You might have a natural inclination towards astrology, tarot, or other mystical subjects. Venus in the 8th house can also lead to a desire for control in relationships and financial matters. You may find it challenging to trust others completely. Your love life is often transformative. Relationships have the power to change you, and you may go through periods of intense emotional growth and change through love. On the downside, you might struggle with jealousy and possessiveness in relationships. It's important to work on trust and open communication. Venus adds an element of grace and elegance to your personality. You have a refined taste and may enjoy indulging in luxurious and beautiful things.
Venus in the 9th house
You possess a deep love for exploring new horizons, whether through travel, higher education, or spiritual pursuits. The desire to expand your worldview through these means is a significant part of your life.Venus brings harmony to your beliefs and values. You seek a sense of unity and may find beauty in various cultural, philosophical, or religious traditions. This placement often indicates a person with a more liberal and open-minded approach to different belief systems. You're attracted to intellectual and philosophical subjects. Learning is not just a duty but a pleasure for you. You may excel in fields related to higher education, publishing, or teaching. Venus in the 9th house encourages an appreciation for art, culture, and aesthetics from around the world. You might have a love for foreign languages, literature, or art. In relationships, you may be drawn to partners from diverse cultural or educational backgrounds. Romantic relationships often have a touch of adventure and exploration. Travel can be a source of pleasure and learning for you. You may have the opportunity to travel for pleasure and education. These experiences can be pivotal in your personal growth. Your ability to express your beliefs is marked by diplomacy and charm. You can discuss sensitive topics without causing offense and might even be a mediator in philosophical or religious debates. You seek deeper, spiritual truths and might explore various belief systems to find your own path. This placement often indicates a person on a lifelong journey of self-discovery. Your sense of aesthetics is influenced by your exposure to different cultures. You appreciate the beauty in diversity and may incorporate elements of various cultures into your personal style or home decor. At times, your strong desire for expansion and exploration can make you restless or commitment-averse in relationships. You may need to find a balance between your love for freedom and the stability of a long-term partnership.
Venus in the 10th house
You are likely to be quite focused on your career and public image. Venus in the 10th house suggests that you have a strong desire for success and recognition in your chosen field. You're drawn to professions that involve art, beauty, fashion, design, or anything that allows you to express your creative and aesthetic talents. You possess a natural charm and diplomacy that makes you adept at dealing with people in authority. This can be a valuable asset in your professional life, as you have the ability to network, negotiate, and create positive relationships with influential individuals. You have a refined sense of aesthetics, which can be applied to your career choices. Whether you are an artist, a fashion designer, or even in a corporate setting, you appreciate beauty and elegance. This can help you stand out in your profession. Your public image is important to you, and you are often seen as someone with a strong sense of style and grace. People may view you as a tastemaker or a person who embodies the ideal of beauty and harmony. Venus in the 10th house can also indicate an interest in social standing and a desire to be associated with those in higher social strata. You may feel comfortable in elite social circles and aspire to climb the social ladder. You tend to approach authority figures with diplomacy and grace. This can help you navigate your way through the corporate world or other hierarchical structures with finesse. There can be a connection between your career and your relationships. You may meet significant others through your professional endeavors or choose a partner who is supportive of your career goals. Careers in public relations, marketing, or any field that involves presenting an appealing public image may be particularly suitable for you. Your ability to make things look good is a valuable skill. You are likely to gain popularity and recognition in your career, which is influenced by your charm and your ability to win people over. However, be mindful of balancing your personal and professional life. With Venus in the 10th house, there can be a tendency to prioritize your career at the expense of your personal relationships, so it's important to find equilibrium.
Venus in the 11th house
Venus in the 11th house is like a social magnet. People with this placement often have a natural charm and are well-liked by their friends and acquaintances. They're the ones who make social gatherings more enjoyable. This placement fosters strong and meaningful friendships. Venus encourages harmonious connections, and in the 11th house, it means you're likely to have a wide circle of friends who genuinely care about you. The 11th house is associated with social causes and humanitarian efforts. With Venus here, you might be drawn to charity work or other activities that promote social well-being. Venus in the 11th house makes you great at networking. You easily connect with people who can help you professionally and personally, which can be a significant asset in your career. You're a team player by nature. Collaboration and group activities bring you joy, and you're likely to excel in team-based projects. You might find yourself involved in social or community events, and people often look up to you as a popular figure. Your charisma and appeal can lead to a high level of popularity. In matters of love, you're an idealist. You seek a partner who not only shares your goals and dreams but also someone who is your best friend. Your love life is often intertwined with your social circles. This placement can also bring creative friends into your life. You're drawn to artistic, musical, or creative individuals who inspire you. On the flip side, there can be a tendency to keep some emotional distance from friends. You might appear more aloof than you actually are, which could be misunderstood by some. The 11th house represents your hopes and dreams. With Venus here, you're likely to have artistic and aesthetic aspirations. You may want to make the world a more beautiful place. Venus is linked to money, and in the 11th house, it can bring financial opportunities through your network and friends. Your social connections might play a role in your financial success.
Venus in the 12th house
This placement often indicates secret or clandestine love affairs. You might find yourself drawn to relationships that aren't out in the open, maybe due to societal or personal reasons. You've got a vivid imagination and a strong creative streak. This could manifest in artistic talents or a penchant for daydreaming. You tend to keep your emotions hidden, even from yourself. It can take a while for you to truly understand what you want and need in love and relationships. The 12th house is about self-sacrifice, and with Venus here, you might find yourself giving a lot in your relationships, sometimes to the detriment of your own needs. You have a deep well of compassion and empathy for others. You might be drawn to help those who are less fortunate or in need. Venus in the 12th can inspire artistic pursuits in seclusion. You might excel in creative fields where you can work behind the scenes. This placement can also indicate a strong connection between love and spirituality. You might seek a partner who shares your spiritual beliefs or find love in places of worship. On the flip side, relationships can be a source of inner turmoil. You might attract partners who are emotionally complex or who bring hidden issues to the surface. Your idea of romance can be dreamy and idealistic. You might have high expectations in love and may need to learn to balance these with reality. The 12th house is often associated with past life issues and karma. You might feel a strong karmic connection with some of your partners. Privacy is essential to you when it comes to love. You might not be one to flaunt your relationships on social media or in public. Your desires in love can be somewhat unconscious, and you may not always understand why you're attracted to certain people or situations.
#tarotwithavi#venus astrology#venus in houses#venus in 8th house#astrology#astro observations#astro community#astroblr#venus in astrology#venus in the 8th house#venus in the 1st house#venus in the 12th house#venus in scorpio#venus in virgo#venus in taurus#venus#venus in leo#venus in signs#venus in capricorn#venus in the sky#pick a card
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doting wife - enji x reader
pairing: Enji “Endeavor” Todoroki x Reader
rating: 18+
summary: ”Enji,“ You said as you walked through the manor. It was summer and Enji wanted to put you something more traditional during these summer months. So you went through the halls of the manor in nothing bout a yukata decorated with flower and flames to signify who you belonged to. As if your round and active middle didn't give it away.
tags: wife!reader, pregnant!reader, smut, rough sex, doggy style, pregnancy kink, breeding kink
”Enji,“ You said as you walked through the manor. It was summer and Enji wanted to put you in something more traditional during these summer months. So you went through the halls of the manor in nothing but a yukata decorated with flowers and flames to signify who you belonged to. As if your round and active middle didn't give it away.
You rubbed your lower back in annoyance, now in month six you were starting to feel the aches and pains of carrying a Todoroki child. You shuffled through the manor and peeked into rooms until you found your husband in the training room.
You were Enji Todoroki's first wife. Quirkless since birth but he didn't care. You would give him the children he desired. He once described your womb as a bare canvas so all the children you had would be more likely to develop a quirk like his than anything else. You took what he said as a compliment, you were giving Enji the family he always wanted. It was your job to be a doting wife and mother in the Todoroki home.
You peeked through the gap on the door and smiled when you saw him. At almost fifty, nothing really stopped him. He was still going strong, you knew for sure his swimmers were growing strong because it only took four months of marriage before you got a pink plus sign. You rubbed your swollen mound and felt a slight movement of your child. You gave a firm yet sweet pat before you opened the sliding doors of the room and went inside.
Enji was lifting weights in the center of the room, the weights, just from the size of them, were heavy. Something a woman like you wouldn't be able to lift, especially not in this state. Yes, there were women heroes, but some women were simply meant to be loving wives.
He looked up at you and put down the weights with a 'thud'. He was sweaty all over and even from a distance you could tell that his skin was hot. He looked at you like a prize, something he won. It didn't take much convincing from your family to let the much older, number one hero wed you. Even if you were wife number two, the amount of money that was left in the wake of him taking you away was more than enough to compensate.
He placed a large hand on your swollen middle, “How is he doing?” His voice was gruff, you remembered the first time you heard it in person, it aroused you in a way. He rubbed your bump and leaned down to kiss you. His wedding ring gleamed in the sunlight that came through the windows.
“He's doing well, a little achy on my hips but I'll survive. Everyone told me it wouldn't be easy, so I have to expect it.” You placed a hand on top of his and beamed up at him.
“Would you like for me to rub your back?” He asked, then reached behind you and put a hand on your lower back, he gently rubbed the skin as he guided you to a yoga mat near the corner of the room.
He loved when you wore outfits like the one he put you in today. He found modern maternity clothes too restrictive, this gave you freedom and movement as you moved through the manor. He helped you down onto the mat where you attempted to sit cross-legged but your belly got in the way.
Maybe he should've taken a wife so small, but to be fair most women were small compared to him. But he believed that you were strong enough to carry his protege. The child that would beat All Might, unlike his other children who failed him. He reached around to your front and undid your yukata. He pulled it down your shoulders until your entire back was exposed. Then he took off your bra, you had complained about how weighty they had become, and he assured you that it came with pregnancy, after all you had to feel a Todoroki. No small feat for anyone.
You sat there and felt the warmth of your husband's skin as he began to massage your sore back. You place your hands on your swollen mound and rub the area. You basked in the feeling of your husband. He was a man who knew what he wanted, and he wanted you to carry his children. He needed a strong, dedicated mother and wife. And in turn he'd make sure you never went without. Your role was to fill the manor and keep those mouths fed and happy.
And after all that's what you wanted in life. A dedicated wife to Endeavor, make sure his legacy lives on after he retires. Create and birth the next number one hero. The thought made you smile as you felt movement in your belly. You felt content, his strong hands worked your tired muscles. Eventually his hands traveled to where your hands were and he began to rub gently at your stretched skin. He felt the movement of his son inside of you and started to kiss your neck.
“We shouldn't.” You whimpered as your fingers locked with his. You made a small noise as his top teeth grazed the soft skin of your neck.
“There's no one else here, dear. Just you and me.” His voice was low. He gripped you hands tightly, “And a wife is always ready for her husband.” He added before he pulled his hands away from yours and began to take the rest of the yukata off your body. Soon you were just left in black maternity underwear that ended below the belly.
He tossed it to the side and began to massage your achy breasts. His calloused thumbs played with your hard nipples as you felt wetness grow between your legs, soaking your panties.
“You look amazing, my love.” He said. His lips grazed your ear, “As a proper woman should look.” His problem with his previous marriage was that he was too focused on quirks. What he wanted was a woman who idolized him like the sun. Someone younger, more traditional leaning. From there she'd raise great children, where one if not all will become great heroes.
The grip on your breasts made you roll your hips a little bit, your heart rate was quickening as you felt the wetness dampen your panties. You probably looked like a big beached whale with that belly, but Enji adored you. And you in turn gave over everything to him. He'd always take care of you, you had nothing to worry your little head about.
“What do you say, my love. Let me take care of you even more.” He leaned you forward and you got on your hands and knees with your ass facing him. He stroked your under belly from between your legs, feeling the movement of the strong son you'll be giving in a few months time.
You moaned when he wrist grazed your sex over your underwear as he pulled his hand away. You felt him take off the black underwear and with your help got it off your thighs. Enji pulled away for a moment before he returned with a yoga ball to give you something to rest against while he pounded into you.
You relaxed yourself but kept steady so as to not roll away. Soon his large fingers were spreading your pussy lips. You clenched in anticipation but relaxed when he inserted the tip. You made a sharp noise and he rubbed your hip as he guided his length into you.
“How's that, my love?” He asked.
“So good, Enji.” You whimpered as you felt the stretch of his cock inside of you. Soon his heavy length was seated inside of your sweet cunt. You were still tight like you were the first time you made love to him. Which was your first time ever with sex.
He started to move his hips quickly, your belly and breasts moved with every rough thrust. He loved his sex hard and fast, he loved watching his partners try to accommodate his size as quickly as possible. He liked when it hurt a little and their poor moans left their mouths as they tried to get him to slow down. When it came to sex, the first goal was procreation and after that it was a place to empty his balls after a tough day.
And he believed his wife should always be ready, and you usually were. Wanting nothing more than to make love to him while he drilled his cock inside of you. You moved your body in time with him, the hard thrusts against a thin yoga mat while your sweaty body clung to the rubber of the yoga ball.
Enji felt under you at your belly and rubbed the mound while using it as leverage to ram his cock inside of you. You voice pierced the air as he continued to fuck you. Your face laid pressed against the ball as he worked your body. You felt like such a sweet hole, a soft cunt for him to release his needs into. He grabbed your belly and groped it to feel what he put inside of you.
No other man will ever have a taste of your sweet sex. He was yours until you both died, you'll never want or need another man in your life. You would only belong to him for the rest of your days. You'd be the proud Todoroki mother he always craved. He could see you now with five, six, maybe seven kids. Enough to fill the empty home you both inhabit.
Your noises were so sweet, he could tell your mouth was hung open as you tried to get as much air as possible. You held on tightly to steady yourself against the wave of thrusts that Enji brought down on you. You swore he was hitting all the sweet spots, you'd like for him to slow down for the sake of the baby but once Enji got something in his head, you couldn't stop him.
"You're beautiful. My beautiful bred wife. With a cunt still as sweet as our wedding night." He groaned as he moved faster. The sounds of sex were louder in the room as he practically dominated you. The idea of you dominating was almost cute, you couldn't even tie your shoes now let alone be on top. You were better on your back or belly anyway. It gave Enji easy access to your sex.
“Thank you, Enji. I love you. I'm happy I married you every day. You make me a better woman every day.“ You lived in your idea of heaven as Enji thrusted away inside of you. You were happy with this life, when you saw your age going out in skimpy clothes you were happy for them, but you were more content with the round middle you sported and the cute traditional maternity clothes Enji picked out for you.
Your belly continued to sway with the movements, soon you placed a hand on your rounded middle and moaned into the rubber. You felt your cunt clench around his cock. The feeling of pleasure coursed through your boy as you felt on the edge of orgasm. You moaned loudly and arched your back and your belly brushed further up against the yoga ball.
“Beautiful. And all mine.“ He responded as he grabbed your ass. He gave a quick swat and groaned over how you tightened once more. The sex was loud and rough, the sensation left you on the edge of your seat.
”Please, Enji! AH!“ And with that you came around his cock, soaking it in your wetness.
”That's it. That's my love. So good.“ He groaned as he continued to thrust his hips. His cock painfully hard inside of you. He too was about to cum . His pace became disorganized as he thrusted hard into you. He grit his teeth and felt his skin run hot as he thrusted into you one last time and finished inside of you.
You moaned into the ball and the thrusting stopped. The obscene sound was made when he pulled his cock out of your abused cock. With a string of cum connecting the two of you. With careful hands Enji got you onto your ass once more onto the mat.
He rubbed your belly and gazed at you, his cock hung soft between his legs. You panted widely as you came down from your high. The feeling was addictive. You looked at the time on the wall clock and quickly got up.
”Where are you going?“ He asked.
”It's time to make dinner. I need to feed you after all!” And stark naked, you waddled out of the room to go back to the kitchen. The sight made him smile as he followed you with your clothes. It was a sight to behold, his happy pregnant wife on her way to make him dinner. What a life.
#enji todoroki#endeavor fanfic#endeavor x reader#enji x reader#enji smut#endeavor smut#bnha smut#bnha x reader#my hero academia x reader#my hero academia#mha fanfiction#mha endeavor#mha smut#mha x you#mha#endeavor
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🌊9th house & journeys over water🌊
9th house -house of long journeys over water. This is a house that represents long journeys (the journeys are not always only physical, but can also be spiritual). This shows how you deal with spirituality/religion. What is the meaning of life for you, where do you find meaning. It also shows your optimism. What brings you positivity and where do you find positivity? In which direction you lean and how you grow.
🌙9th house moon-when you believe something you are emotionally committed to it. Your well-being also often depends on the environment. You like to change your surroundings and maybe your home can be a foreign country. Traveling fills you up emotionally. You can find meaning through emotional spirituality. Maybe it's good if you do something related to your emotions (emotional therapy, meditation). You have to emotionally belong somewhere in this world.
❤️9th house venus-you can find love in travel. You love another culture and way of life. You can also try other foods many times. You find immense love, happiness and affection in your partner, and you discover satisfaction when doing what you are passionate about. The native with a love of traveling also loves experiencing different cultures and different kinds of beauty in art and history. It’s easy for them to get together with people from different backgrounds, but when it comes to love, they want someone adventurous and eager to travel.
🥳9th house mars- can signifies disagreements with the father, fatherly figure or teachers. You can have a very strong approach to thinking. You can also be a very independent person and want to do things on your own. When you decide to go somewhere, you go there. You can be very independent in other countries. And you feel a lot of passion through spirituality and travel. Their mind is always open, and a good debate makes them want to hear more from their conversational partner.
💘9th house mercury- You have very intelligent mindset. You are open to many cultures and love to explore places. It can also mean that you explore a lot of countries, food, languages. When you travel, your mind fills up. Mercury here loves to talk about philosophy, religion and spirituality. Through wondering about these questions, they find meaning in life. Through wondering about these questions, they find meaning in life. You like traveling, but you also like reading books from foreign authors. Your mind is filled with exploration. You can quickly find positive thoughts even when everything is negative. Because mercury helps you find a way and meaning in the most difficult paths and the smallest things.
🎨9th house sun- you get inspiration through travels, cultures, places. You feel inspired when you are somewhere else. Places bring you the sun in your life. You like adventure. You are likely to be motivated by the need to expand and broaden your horizons, either physically or intellectually. You may be fascinated by travel and foreign places, seeking to discover what else exists in the world. They will always be aware of the deepest matters regarding life and will want to give their existence meaning. Everything you do in life have to give you meaning. Throughout life, you are always looking for positive sides and optimism. The sun helps you to shine fully. It always gives you new hope, which you can find everywhere you go. It is like the eternal sunshine.
🧸9th house saturn- You have a serious attitude towards religion and you hold fast to it. These people are traditional in thinking and religious in personality. They work very hard in life to achieve their determined goal. Maybe you can travel a lot on business. Saturn is a slow-moving planet, and hence it makes the native work towards anything he desires to achieve. Maybe your beliefs in spirituality and the path are difficult and pessimistic at the beginning, but in the end you see many beautiful things in the world. You also have a calm nature.
🧚🏼♀️9th house jupiter-you travel a lot and find your way and faith faster than others. Jupiter gives you optimism, positivity, encouragement and meaning in life. You want to make the most of life. Jupiter gives you many opportunities. Relaxed and enjoying life, you can never see them sweating about what doesn’t matter. It’s easy for them to get creative and their health is always top-notch. Traveling is their true passion and they really hate being in one place for too long. You are always accompanied by happiness and optimism.
🧩9th house uranus- you have a strong sense of justice and you hate injustice and cruelty. You may be involved in politics or the social services. You may find yourself feeling that words don’t really have the power to capture every nuance of reality. Uranus dislikes tradition, and when it is placed in the ninth house, you have modern views that can be sometimes shocking to your family. Inspiration and positive changes come unexpectedly. Sooner or later, you will probably completely change your views. This will be reflected in your public image and career, too. You are looking for a place in this world where you belong (you can find it in the most unexpected situations and places).
🌊9th house pluto-You can have a very intense and deep approach to the world. The places you travel to can make a deep impression on you. Usually a place represents something deeper to you. This placement suggests that there are several soul-searching phases in your life, which in the end, lead to deep transformation. You sometimes feel that you don’t belong to the place where you were born. This placement also suggests that you seek power through your belief system, and you are attached very strongly because of this. You have to feel the world through your soul.
💕9th house neptune- many times you can be impressed by places by the sea. You can be more connected to the universe. Your personal philosophy contains a lot of spiritual and religious elements. You are drawn to the mysterious side of existence, and you frequently think about things beyond the everyday reality. You can have places in your head that you have never seen or that are only in your imagination. You are strongly aligned with your higher self. It can make you too optimistic, seeing the situation better than it actually is. Neptune helps you achieve your dreams.
-Rebekah🧚🏼♀️🎨
#astrology#energy#zodiac signs#planets#astrological houses#9h house#sagittarius#jupiter#neptune#saturn#pluto#sun#mercury#venus
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The depth of Bakugo’s apology
I saw the clip from the anime’s rendition of Bakugo’s apology and was filled with the same emotions as when I first read it in the manga. It was powerful, it was beautiful, it was gentle, and it meant something to people. But while it was great to see Bakugo apologetic for his past actions to Izuku during his time of need, the fandom often neglects the layers to that apology.
I think one thing about Bakugo’s apology that makes it so powerful is that when he says “I’m sorry [Izuku] for everything”, he’s referencing more than simply his bullying. Sure, he’s haunted by his constant guilt for what he did and the long term affects of it, but he’s also sorry that things ended up the way they did.
He’s sorry that Izuku has so much self loathing towards himself and his quirkless past. He’s sorry that Izuku was given One For All without being given the full truth about the quirk and its legacy. He’s sorry that Izuku was given so much responsibly and sorry that Izuku was put under so much pressure as he wielder of One For All— that he had to be the next symbol of piece alone. He’s sorry that Izuku was made to feel as though everything & everyone relied on him. He’s sorry that Izuku feels as though his only value comes from saving people, and that if he can’t save everyone then he’s a failure. He’s sorry that Izuku feels the need to break himself beyond repair in order to be respected as the deku who always does his best.
Bakugo is sorry that Izuku has been through so much emotional torment over the past year, going through a downward spiral since the minute he was given OFA, and he [Bakugo] couldn’t stop him from leaving the hospital and their friends behind in time. He’s sorry that things had to get to this point.
So much can be taken from just a few words. Bakugo knows deku very well, and he knows that Deku’s suffering extends far beyond his being bullied. I think that is another reason Deku has such a strong visible reaction to Bakugo’s words. He feels seen, and he feel like everyone in his class, not just limited to but especially Bakugo, are finally understanding him on a level that he refused to understand himself on. The light comes back to his eyes because Izuku Midoriya has suffered, and everyone knows, and they still love him. Luckily, things will be ok because he is not alone. Bakugo’s there for him. 1-A’s there for him. They’ll heal together.
In conclusion, I believe that during fandom discussions about Bakugo’s apology that we should really take the time to realize just how charged his words are and how he is using his apology to build a level of understanding— not just simply to right a past wrong. He wants to right ALL the wrongs of Izuku’s life, and that can simply be done through empathy and understanding. You can’t undo the past, but you can help one-another heal, because in the words of Bakugo Katsuki, “I/we know.”— I/we get it, and we’re sorry you’ve gone through all that.
Before I go, I also just want to mention how Bakugo’s use of language in Japanese is noticeably softer than how he usually talks. He cares so much, and he wants to make that fact known. In addition, he uses Izuku’s first name, which as many of you already know is a huge deal in Japanese culture. It signifies intense closeness. Bakugo is once and for all reclaiming his status as Izuku’s childhood friend. This has already been happening for a while, but in this moment he finally wants to make that known to the people around him without shame or guilt.
As he stands surrounded by water, he apologizes for not taking Izuku’s hand in the river. He also reclaims this moment by metaphorically taking Izuku’s hand in the form of the apology. It doesn’t matter anymore whether he physically takes his childhood friend’s hand, what matters is his intent and his want to connect. What matters is Bakugo Katsuki’s ability to never let Izuku go again.
This isn’t really necessarily meant to be shippy I just love character connections and quotes with multiple meanings. Also when I mention Deku’s pressure from OFA please don’t think that I’m bashing All Might. I love him I just think that some mistakes were made and Izuku just generally feels pressure from his role as the yielded of the quirk.
#Bnha#mha#boku no hero academia#my hero academia#bnha meta#bnha analysis#midoriya izuku#izuku midoriya#bakugo katsuki#katsuki bakugo#I’m simply tagging this just to help people sort through the content they want to see:#Bakudeku#Bkdk#This entire apology gets me right in the feels#There’s just something so beautiful about so many different feelings and thoughts only being able to be conveyed in a few powerful words#Also to the people that follow me for my metas: hi I’m back did you miss me
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love language- levi ackerman smut x reader
WARNING: SMUT- MINORS, ANYONE UNDER 18, DNI
y’all!! this is the first smut i’ve ever written. so i apologize if it’s utterly horrific. i had this dream a couple days ago and literally couldn’t shake it. i hope you enjoy!!
Includes: slapping, angry sex, dom!levi, sub!reader, breeding kink and talks of pregnancy, rough sex, raw sex, dirty talk, pet names, a bit of degrading, jealous!levi, featuring reiner braun if you squint.
levi fucked me for the first time after a messy and horrific scouting expedition that took us outside the walls. at first, it wasn’t anything special. it was a stress reliever, a thrill to signify our joy of living to see the next day. that was a couple years ago. since then, we had the occasional fuck.
he was a beautiful and brilliant man, but i knew he didn’t want a relationship. we couldn’t have relationships as scouts, it made us vulnerable. they were distractions. and i was alright with that. it wasn’t as if levi strung me along for another woman. i was the only one he ever gave himself to, in all the years i’ve known him.
but this, this was different.
it started out as an interaction i wouldn’t even have noted as sexual. i asked him to come to my office because i had a question regarding care of the cadets and horses- i was considered the cadet captain until the specialized units took their pick of the litter. just like how levi took eren.
i opened the door for levi. he was wearing his uniform. i however, was feeling much more casual. it was technically my day off as the recruits all did horse and field training with commander erwin.
“come in,” i gave the fellow captain a small smile.
“you had a question?” he asked, apathetic. the only time levi seemed to give me any emotions is when he was fucking me out or when he held me before i slept. neither of those things occurred at the same time, or on more than a monthly basis. it was a bizarre personality change, but i had gotten used to it by this point.
i gestured to my desk. he stood next to me as i discussed a plan i had created. reiner braun, a new scout, was exquisitely talented at hand to hand combat. most of the cadets were, but combined with reiner’s stature, he was formidable. i wanted to find ways to keep the cadets’ hand to hand strong, even though it’s not used as much. i felt it was valuable.
when i looked up at levi to get his opinion, he had a thin lipped expression, and his arms crossed.
he was quiet for a moment, behaving as though i knew exactly what upset him. i sat there with a confused look on my face, truly unclear of what his problem was.
“do you want to fuck reiner braun?” he asked and i tried not to laugh.
“do i, a twenty four year old woman, want to fuck the sixteen year old new cadet?” i repeated. “did you really just ask me that?”
i tried to stand up from the desk and walk away but levi took a step towards me, locking me in between his figure and the desk.
“you speak very highly of the cadet, that’s all,” levi angled his face down towards me. “it seems like you have a new favorite,”
i was dumbfounded. i couldn’t believe the words coming out of his mouth.
“what the fuck is your problem?” i asked him, with crossed arms. if he was mad at me about something, the way to deal with it was not accusing me of being sexually aroused by my subordinate.
“i’ve never heard you speak so highly of another man and his abilities, and i don’t like it.”
levi ackerman was jealous of the cadet. this was priceless.
“i’ve been slacking on taking care of you,” he continued with minimal pause, “i haven’t been fucking you out every night, but that doesn’t mean you get to whore around for whoever makes you wet.”
if this wasn’t the sexiest thing i had ever heard, i would probably send him a right hook to the jaw.
“if you are looking for an excuse to fuck me, you know you don’t need one,” i smirked devilishly at him.
he didn’t like the misbehavior. at this point, we entered familiar territory. he knew my office led to my quarters.
we were very similar in how we kept our rooms. spotless and tidy. the only difference was i had more memorabilia. cameras and photos were hard to come by but i took a group photo with every cadet class under my supervision. a novel on my bedside table, my reading classes, that was all. it was almost as if no one lived there otherwise.
levi shut the door to the bedroom behind us after dragging me in. i willingly followed him, but was annoyed when he didn’t answer my questions: ‘levi, what are you doing?’ and ‘levi, let me go!’
“i’m going to fuck you so hard, you won’t ever be able to say the name of another man without thinking of the way i’m about to make you feel.”
it was at that moment i understood, that was the capacity at which levi could show love. this brought back a whirlwind of memories- fucking after rough missions, shower sex when i would clean our wounds, sex after either of us had nightmares.
my realization had me stunned as levi began to undress me with fervor. it wasn’t long before we were blending our bodies together, messing the covers of my made bed.
i loved the feeling of his shoulders, his back, his chest. i always took time with them when i was graced with his touch.
“who else knows the way to make you scream?” levi asked in my ear, sultry tone in his voice as he inserted two fingers into me and used his thumb on my clit.
“no one, levi,” i breathed, my eyelids feeling heavy and demanding to close to fully feel his hands inside me.
“who else has ever touched you like this?” he asked again, “what men have gotten to see the whore you are?”
it was true, no one else. i joined the military at a young age and found most of the men there agitating. then, it got to a point where i felt embarrassed to be a virgin so i never spoke about it. levi was my first.
his hands began to move faster. it made the coherent sentences in my brain turn into alphabet soup.
“tell me, baby girl,” levi encouraged, biting down on the base of my neck.
“i promise, no one levi-“ a slap echoed.
i startled. my hand went to my face as levi continued his motions.
“that’s not my name,” he corrected.
“daddy,” i whispered out and i could see the satisfaction glint in his eyes.
“good girl,” he slipped another finger inside me and i nearly began to convulse.
i felt another bite on my shoulder as levi situated himself further inside me.
the telltale signs of my climax came quickly. i began to beg and whine for levi’s hand, his tongue, his anything to make me finish. i gave myself to him with my words.
my back arched, which gave him the opportunity to drag his tongue across my exposed, hardened nipples. i gasped and tightened around his fingers, causing him to pull out.
i was furious. did he do this as a joke? was this funny to him?
he could sense my anger.
i glared at him, only until he wrapped his fingers in my hair and yanked my head down, disarming me and sinking me into the mattress.
my thighs were spread out by his other hand and without warning, he plunged himself into me.
the force levi began to exert on my body felt similar to riding the horse. except this didn’t stop at the waist. i felt every bit of his energy flow all the way to my fingers. i could feel his force in every fiber of my being as levi bit up and down my neck, assumably covering my neck in splotchy bruises that i’d have to don shamelessly later.
and it wasn’t long before i had succumbed to levi, again and again. it was the way levi felt inside of me that made my stamina melt away. it made me putty in levi ackerman’s hands.
“who fucks you like this, baby?” he coaxed before biting down on my ear.
“you do, daddy,” i conceded. creating coherent sentences wasn’t my best attribute when i was getting bedded by humanity’s strongest.
“that’s not how you acted earlier,” he corrected. his thrusts became angry. he was vicious.
“talking to me about how strong another man is. i should make you wait until you’re a speechless mess to come for me. you don’t deserve it,” he chided me. another slap resounded across my face.
i scratched down levi’s back, hard. i could feel his skin under my nails get red and angry but it felt so good to do. i needed to touch him.
“that’s right princess, mark me up,” levi bit down on my shoulder, licking the wound he made. “i was thinking of all the ways i could claim you, let every other man know you’re untouchable,”
i was too strung out on levi’s cock to fully understand the gravity of what he was saying.
“i’m going to fuck a baby into you,” he purred at me. “fuck you so hard you swell up, i’ll get you a little place to stay and i can come fuck you every day that i’m home,”
levi ackerman didn’t just insinuate i get pregnant, is he?
i didn’t even fucking care. as i approached my… third? fourth? orgasm, i couldn’t keep count anymore.
when i didn’t answer, he asked again. “how does that sound princess? i fuck you until you’re knocked up and then i parade you around,”
getting pregnant would mean i’d be discharged from any sort of combat role.
but to carry levi’s children? there’s no end i wouldn’t go to.
he grabbed my face, to focus my eyes on him. levi’s thrusts were getting faster and i could tell he was waiting on a genuine answer from me before determining where he would cum.
“princess, you need to tell daddy if he can fuck a baby into you,”
i didn’t realize i hesitated. it wasn’t even a question.
“yes, daddy,” i spoke, they were my first real words in a few minutes. tears forming in my eyes from the sheer stimulation from levi’s cock and his hands, “please- i-i-i put a baby in me daddy,”
that was exactly what lexi wanted to hear. not long after, his ruts became shakier. i could tell levi was done for.
i kissed him hard as i whined into his mouth, and he showered me with praise as his hand gently squeezed my throat.
i felt myself cum in a way that only came from a desperation, a need. levi finished at the same time and i could feel his member throb inside of me, hopefully giving me the baby he so wanted there.
i believed this is what the philosophers speak of about the afterlife. the feeling of finishing all over levi’s cock while he angry fucks a baby into me, this was the closest i’d ever get to a paradise.
#levi ackerman#captain levi#smut#aot#levi smut#aot smut#18+ only#preggo kink#levi attack on titan#levi ackerman smut
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𝐀𝐍 𝐀𝐍𝐆𝐄𝐋 𝐒𝐓𝐀𝐍𝐃𝐈𝐍𝐆 𝐈𝐍 𝐓𝐇𝐄 𝐒𝐔𝐍 (𝟏𝟖+)
𝐌𝐈𝐍𝐎𝐑𝐒 𝐃𝐍𝐈
[ PAIRINGS ] Eren x f!reader, Grisha x f!reader, Zeke x f!reader
[ AUTHOR'S NOTE ] My magnum opus /hj. Shout out to my dear friend Mica because I couldn't have written this fic without their support and guidance. And shout out to @strawberrystepmom because this fic is what brought us together lmaoooooo.
[ SYNOPSIS ] Disillusioned by your current church, you find yourself drawn to a charismatic televangelist and his seemingly pious sons.
[ WORD COUNT ] 14.6k
[ CONTENT ] DARK CONTENT, tall-coded reader, sacrilege, incest (between Eren and Zeke), age gap (Grisha’s in his late 40s, y/n is in her 20s), masturbation, cucking, threesome, voyeurism, drugs (weed), dubcon (power imbalance, pastor x parishioner), degradation (during sex and just in general), angst, manipulation, creampie, thick Yeager dick, humiliation, y/n gets called “sister” while getting fucked but it’s in a religious sense, religious trauma, disturbing biblical imagery (violence), cigarettes (Zeke), biting, hair pulling, impact play (slapping), oral sex (m + f receiving), cum play, panty sniffing, spit play, blood (not in a sexy way), these men are strong and can manhandle/lift you with ease.
And I saw an angel standing in the sun; and he cried with a loud voice, saying to all the birds that fly in the midst of heaven…
The early vestiges of a Sunday morning didn’t inspire deep thinking or any form of reflection. It was a time to be brain dead, to indulge in the death rattle of public access television. You witnessed a zookeeper getting bit by a garter snake on a children’s program, families attending therapy while honing their dancing skills, deadly go-kart races, and a man demonstrating the superabsorbent qualities of chamois cloths.
It was welcomed. You needed to be numbed before meandering to the megachurch. Sermons were easier to suffer through if you were vaguely dissociative, your eyes glazing over as the exploiter behind the altar repeated his chicanery.
Salvation had to be earned. Consumption was godly. Wealth was bestowed to only the most pious of people. Sinners lived impoverished lives. They didn’t work hard enough. Your inability to line the pastor’s pockets proved you didn’t believe hard enough.
You weren’t sure if you called yourself a believer anymore. Church didn’t inspire you. It was just an unexciting compulsion. It signified the start of the week, the sun overtaking the hills. Nothing more, nothing less.
You don’t know what possessed you to tune in for Service For Shut-Ins that morning. Usually you knew to turn off the TV when twilight began to brew. But for whatever reason the show called out to you.
It likely had something to do with the emerald-eyed man on the television shouting, “Hey, you! Yeah, you!”
You were immediately transfixed. His chocolate brown hair was piled on top of his head in a messy bun, tendrils of hair haphazardly framing his face. His olive skin was sun kissed. He wore a crisp white button-down tucked into a pair of black straight leg trousers. His outfit was topped off with a pair of respectable, leather suspenders of a mahogany hue. He looked more like a model than a preacher.
“I think you’ve sufficiently startled the three people that are watching this,” a gruff voice muttered from behind the camera.
“Aw. Come on, brother. There’s at least five.”
The brunette smirked and flipped through a worn bible resting on the walnut wooden pulpit. The room he stood in was sparsely decorated. The walls were stark white. A blue velvet curtain hung behind him, giving everything a rather Lynchian appearance. It was the exact opposite of the flashy amphitheater you typically worshiped in.
“Do we start? Where’s dad?” The brunette asked.
“No idea. We’re live. Start without him.”
“With my luck he’ll get mad and not talk to me for two fuckin’ days.”
“Eren!” The voice hissed.
Eren shrugged and brushed his hair out of his face. He exhaled and cracked his neck, the sound echoing through the television. Just as he went to speak, a door opened and quickly slammed shut. Solid footsteps emanated from beyond the frame.
“Glad you decided to show up,” Eren joked.
“Very funny,” a rather commanding voice replied. “You’re lucky I’m in a good mood today.”
An older man walked into frame and shooed Eren away from the pulpit. His sleek dark hair was tucked behind his ears, much longer than the hair of your usual pastor. He was dressed exactly the same as Eren, though he looked more disheveled and unshaven.
The man stared down at his bible and smiled.
“Ah, excellent choice, Eren. The Gospel of Matthew.”
You heard the man behind the camera sigh and grumble something incomprehensible under his breath. It was pungent with annoyance. You couldn’t help but laugh.
The pastor stretched and cleared his throat. He dove right into the story of Jesus and the rich man, and how the rich man questioned Christ about how one can attain eternal life. He orated the story by heart; it was riveting. At your church the pastor relied heavily on cue cards when he was compelled to quote scripture. But this pastor passionately relayed how the rich man told Christ he followed all the commandments and was curious as to what he lacked.
“‘If you wish to be perfect, go, sell your possessions, and give the money to the poor, and you will have treasure in heaven; then come, follow me.’ When the young man heard this word, he went away grieving, for he had many possessions.”
He made direct eye contact with the camera.
“To some believers the rich man’s grief is understandable. But what Jesus witnessed was weakness in its purest form. A man too grounded in the luxuries of this world. It’s rather tragic, isn’t it? I can’t imagine having my self worth tethered to the things I own. If you know God, undeniably, you’d never cling to your possessions in the first place.
However, this is not to say the rich man is a lost cause. Everyone is capable of being saved, even the most disgusting and depraved of sinners. But as Jesus says, ‘It will be hard for a rich person to enter the kingdom of heaven. It is easier for a camel to go through the eye of a needle.’”
A chorus of men chanted, “Amen.”
“You,” the pastor said, pointing at the camera and leaning over the pulpit. “I can feel your discontent.” He held his hand to his heart. “I know what it’s like to witness heresy itself. I know how it can make you question your devotion. You curse God, unsure if He is worth following. I want to tell you that He is. It’s undeniably worth living in His light. I tell you, it's not God you wrestle with. It’s the used car salesmen masquerading as your brothers, shrieking in arenas filled to the brim with lost souls. You wrestle with the demons sinking their teeth into your wallet, draining it of every dollar.” His tone grew more intense by the moment. “That is not godliness! That is chicanery! These men do not shepherd their flock with kindness in their heart! They merely want to shear and bleed the sheep, to sell their wool to the highest bidder!”
The chorus of men chanted another, “Amen,” their fervor growing. The pastor’s eyes softened and he gave a small smile.
“You don’t have to weather the storm in your soul alone.”
You were aghast, mouth agape. A tear trickled from your eye down your cheek, leaving a single, salty trail. You wiped it away with the back of your hand and sniffled. How did he know? How did he know you struggled with your faith? That you attended a megachurch run by rich freaks?
No, it was just a coincidence. But a lovely one. You were changed by the pastor's words. He was what you were missing. Him and this Eren. They saved you.
You eschewed attending your old church. Service For Shut-Ins was all you needed. You hung on Pastor Grisha’s every word. Every little thing he said filled you with unspeakable joy. He was intelligent and progressive in comparison to the sermons you used to suffer through. He was also significantly more handsome than any preacher you stumbled upon.
Your hands often found themselves in your underwear, breath hitching as he rolled up his sleeves. His toned forearms could send you spiraling into the depths of lust. Under his intense gaze as he recited scripture, you pretended he could see you delving your fingers in your dripping cunt.
Shame tended to follow after you came, but you couldn’t help yourself. You were smitten.
“I need to see him,” you exhaled.
You found the address for the church on their bare bones website. When you mapped out a route you were pleased to see the church was on the outskirts of town, secluded from the secular nonsense and false prophets.
Your nerves almost got the best of you when you saw the one room church resting near the coast. It was painted black with a white door and white windowsills. It was simple, a welcome change.
“Are you here for service?”
You turned to see a tall blonde-haired man smoking a cigarette. He adjusted his glasses and took a drag. He dressed the same as Pastor Grisha and Eren though the first few buttons of his shirt were undone, revealing a hint of chest hair.
“Uh, yeah. I am. Am I… Am I allowed in?”
He chuckled.
“It’s a church, sister. Not a nightclub. Come on.” He tossed his cigarette to the side. “I’ll walk in with you.”
“Thank you. I won’t lie. I'm a little nervous.”
“Why?” He asked, smirking.
He looked so much like Pastor Grisha you wondered if they were related. The only difference being his flaxen, wavy hair and more muscular build.
“I have a complicated relationship with the Lord.”
“Don’t we all?”
He held open the door for you. You brushed up against his body and your breath hitched. Heat radiated off of him. You wanted to curl up next to him in the pews, have him be your security blanket until you got your sea legs.
“You can sit anywhere, but I don’t recommend sitting in the first row unless you want to get up close and personal with the fury that is Pastor Grisha.”
“Where do you sit?”
He patted your shoulder with his weighty hand.
“I don’t. I work the camera.”
So he was the mysterious voice you heard on occasion. You anxiously thanked him for his kindness before finding a comfortable seat in the middle of the pews. The only other people in the church were a handful of men all dressed the same: white button-down, black pants, leather suspenders. Not a single woman in the room. Suddenly you felt like even more of an outsider. A harlot considering you mostly came to gawk at a beautiful man of God. You nearly choked when he took to the pulpit, but to your dismay Eren was nowhere to be found.
Throughout the sermon you noticed the pastor’s gaze lingering on you. He seemed a little antsy, stumbling over his words, tugging at his collar. A sense of power washed over you. Never once had you seen him struggle to get through a sermon. It was charming.
Once the sermon was finished you quickly gathered yourself and headed towards the door. You caught the eye of the blonde camera operator. He latched onto your wrist as you tried to move past him.
“Where do you think you’re going?” He asked, smirking.
“I was gonna go,” you conceded. “I don’t wanna be a bother, y’know?”
“You’d hardly be a bother if you stuck around.”
His tone was flirtatious.
“I—I, uh, okay,” you stammered. “I can stick around.”
His hand snaked around your waist and he started to lead you out the door. You didn’t know what was happening, but you were pleased Zeke took the initiative to take you under his wing. He was a good Christian.
“What’s your name?”
“It’s Ze—”
Before he could finish, you felt a hand on your shoulder. You turned around to see Pastor Grisha smiling warmly at you.
“Zeke, I hope you're not scaring this young woman away.”
“Oh no. You caught me,” Zeke said, his words dripping with sarcasm.
Zeke let go of you and trudged off, mumbling expletives under his breath.
“He wasn’t scaring me off,” you assured the pastor.
“I’m just giving him a hard time,” he chuckled. “Though he’s not exactly the most welcoming boy around. At least not in a traditional sense.”
“He was very nice. He calmed my nerves a bit,” you said, nervously scratching the back on your scalp. “It’s my first time here.”
“I’m well aware. You’re hard to miss. What’s your name, sister?”
You told him your name and thought it was funny he bothered to tell you his, considering you knew it so well. It was a name that often fell from your lips late at night when you’d let your lusty mind wander. When he shook your hand you tried to memorize how his skin felt against yours. You didn’t know when you would be blessed with such an opportunity again.
“A lovely name for a lovely girl,” he said, squeezing your hand.
You were awestruck and ready to sign your life away to him. No one ever told you were lovely.
“Are you in a hurry?” He asked.
You shook your head.
“Would you be interested in coming to the parsonage for tea? I like to get to know my new congregants lest they not be true believers,” he said with a sharp tongue.
Your eyes widened, terrified that you might not be considered a true believer.
“I’m only kidding, lamb. Come, let’s go.”
You followed him out the door. He directed you towards a little house closer to the cliff overlooking the coast. The architecture was similar to that of the church, but it had two stories and larger windows. The pastor led you inside and you marveled at the foyer. The walls were paneled with wide, oak slats.
“How do you take your tea?” He asked warmly.
You pinched your thigh, dying to know if you were dreaming or not. Luckily you weren’t; you were very much grounded in reality. You told the pastor how you took your tea.
“My office is down the hall, first door on the left. I’ll meet you there.”
You followed his instructions, eager to show him you were an obedient parishioner. As you made your way down the hall you noticed a door cracked open. You peeked inside and saw Eren sitting on his bed, back against the wall, fiddling with something in his lap. Your skin grew hot and you wondered if he was jerking off. You hated yourself for watching, but your curious nature overpowered you.
“Aw shit,” Eren muttered. “I just ground that up.”
He got up, moving a little plate that was resting discreetly in his lap. You sighed. He was just rolling a joint.
“I said it was the first door on the left, lamb.”
You spun around and saw Pastor Grisha holding two cups of tea.
“I… I… don’t know my right from my left.”
You gritted your teeth. It was one of your shittier lies.
“It’s alright. Come, come.”
You followed him into his office and took a seat across from him. His desk was large and made out of the same wood as the paneling on the walls. You dragged your finger across the top of it. It was smooth, not even a hint of splintering.
“Did you make this?”
“I’m flattered you think I’m that handy, but no. My son did. He tends to do most of the building and upkeep around here.”
“Wow. He operates the camera and does the maintenance?”
The pastor stifled a laugh. “No, my other son. Eren.”
You took a sip of your tea. It was exactly how you liked it.
“So, what brought you here?”
“My feet. I’m kidding, uh.”
He smiled.
“I’ve been watching you guys on channel 5 for a few months. I figured it was about time I came to see you in person.”
His eyes narrowed. “To see me?”
“I mean like, you know.” You paused, your nerves getting the better of you. “I wanted to experience this in person. Your sermons.”
You felt like he was staring through you. Like he knew every lurid thought your brain dreamt up.
“I see.”
“I got sick of the church I used to go to,” you admitted.
“And which one was that?”
“Hope Springs Eternal Ministries. It’s the one tha—”
The pastor slammed his cup of tea back on the saucer.
“I’m sorry,” you mumbled.
He ran his hand through his hair and sighed.
“There is no need to apologize. It’s not your fault you attended the most heretical church in town.”
“Yeah, it’s pretty bad there.”
“Tell me, lamb.” He leaned over his desk. “Were you happy?”
“Obviously not,” you scoffed.
“What didn’t you like?”
“Too focused on money and I never have any to spare,” you explained, taking another sip of tea. “Hard to stay a believer when your salvation is tethered to how much money you can throw at someone.”
“You poor thing. It’s a tragedy you and all those other cretins are cursed to attend such a disgusting testament to God.”
“Wow. Cretins, huh?”
He blushed. “I suppose it’s my turn to apologize. It’s not their fault they’re so small minded.”
The pastor’s pretentiousness sullied your deification of him. Granted it was your fault for putting a man on a pedestal in the first place.
“Am I small minded, Pastor Grisha?”
He rubbed his foot against your shin. You swallowed hard.
“I’m not sure, lamb. Have you cut ties with your old church?”
“I haven’t been there in a few months.”
“That doesn’t answer my question.”
You held his gaze and tried to ignore his foot rubbing up and down the length of your leg. Silence flooded the room.
“Yes,” you finally spat out. “I don’t associate with anyone from there. Not a single person.”
He leaned over his desk and beckoned you to come closer. You leaned in and your palms started to sweat. He smelled like cedar and juniper berries. Part of you wanted to kiss him, but you refrained. He cupped your face with his right hand and ran his thumb along your bottom lip. You couldn’t tell if you were turned on or on the verge of an anxiety attack.
“Poor thing. Tell me, are you lonely?”
You hesitated to answer. You were in fact painfully lonely, especially now that you rejected everyone at Hope Springs Eternal. Grisha’s stare was so intense you could have sworn he could read your mind. Just as you went to speak the door abruptly opened. Zeke walked through carrying a bunch of camera equipment. A lit cigarette hung precariously from his mouth.
“You have to tell Hannes not to show up drunk anymore. I spent ten minutes trying to clear him out—Oh, it’s you,” he said, setting the equipment on a plush couch on the other side of the room.
The pastor dropped his hand and leaned back in his chair.
“If I tell him that he’ll never show up again,” he rued. “I hate to think about the trouble he’d get into.”
You were frozen in place, struggling to see how the pastor could be so calm after Zeke saw you on the verge of sucking his thumb.
“Zeke?” He asked. “Are you listening?”
Zeke glared at you, his grey eyes colder than an overcast day in January.
“I heard you, father,” he hissed as he exited the office, leaving the door slightly ajar.
“I oughta go. I don’t want to intrude.”
“Will you be joining us next Sunday?”
“I think so.”
You wanted to bolt for the door but remained seated. The pastor seemed to have some sort of magnetic pull on you. Getting up was out of the question until he said you could.
“I’d prefer it if you knew. Why don’t you give me your phone number so we make sure you remember to show up.”
You gulped. “Alright.”
You scribbled your number down on a sticky note and grimaced. It was a tragic attempt at a smile, but your nerves tainted it.
“I look forward to seeing you again, lamb.”
“That’s if I come back,” you laughed.
His lips became a flat line.
“You will. I’m sure of it.”
The sentence reeked of ominousness. You excused yourself and slid out the door without a word. You feared that if you opened your mouth you’d just scream. When you entered the foyer you saw a very disgruntled Zeke and a sympathetic Eren. They glanced over at you. Eren’s demeanor changed, becoming vaguely welcoming. Whereas Zeke ignored your presence.
“Bye,” you said quietly.
Eren waved and resumed comforting Zeke. Shame came over you. You assumed you were the reason Zeke looked so bothered. Though your obsession remained, you had no intention of returning.
Your phone rang at 2 am, the chime blistering your ears. You didn’t recognize the number and opted not to answer. Just as you were about to fall back asleep, your phone rang again. You declined the call and turned your phone on silent. It didn’t take long for the screen to light up; the mysterious number demanded your attention.
“What?! What is it?!”
“Sorry to bother you. I do realize I’m calling rather late.”
It was Pastor Grisha, his voice clear as day. Not a hint of sleepiness to it.
“Oh fuck, I mean, damn. Dang! Uh, what is it?” You stammered.
“I just wanted to talk to you; that’s all.”
You swallowed hard.
“About?”
“Whatever you’d like.”
You furrowed your brow. Grisha’s actions felt odd and lacking goodwill.
“I don’t have anything to say. I’m pretty tired.”
“It doesn’t matter. Just speak,” he said, his tone finally revealing some hint of urgency.
You paused and tried to think of something to say. You looked out the window at the frost coating the grass.
“It’s been cold lately. I don’t know about you but I’m not used to it. Do you remember it being… this cold?”
You heard rustling on the other end of the phone.
His answer was a clipped, “No.”
“See I’ve seen people try to say it’s always been this way.”
“Ha—have you?” He sputtered.
“Yeah. Uh, like on the news. I feel like they downplay it on purpose.”
“Uh-huh.”
The pastor's breathing grew heavier and you heard him spit in his hand. You clenched your fists and tried to think of harmless things he could be doing. Maybe he had something stuck in his teeth and spit it into the sink.
“It’s gotta be an environmental thing.”
“Climate change,” he choked out.
“You know one of the reasons I started hating Hope Springs Eternal was the pastor not believing in ‘global warming.’ Shows how much he knows, huh?”
“Mhm.”
“I’m, uh, assuming you believe in it.”
“Yes,” he moaned. “It beckons the eschaton.”
You paused, trying to collect your thoughts and ignore what was happening on the other end of the phone.
“Did I tell you to stop?”
“It’s just… That’s a rather disconcerting thought, pastor.”
“Call me Grisha.”
“Okay… Grisha.”
You could hear his hand sliding up and down his cock. You paced around your room. You knew you should have hung up, that this was wrong. But the inappropriateness drew you in. You felt powerful knowing you managed to break down Grisha’s defenses and make him behave like a pitiful sinner.
“Are you close?” You asked.
“Y—yes,” he responded, the words stumbling out of his mouth.
“I hope you realize how loathsome this is.”
You heard a low groan followed by panting, and hung up. You were ashamed of the wet spot in your underwear. You thumbed through your drawer for a fresh pair, slipping them on before crawling back into bed. You lied awake, staring at the ceiling, and tried to make sense of what happened. Masturbating crossed your mind, but it would’ve been unholy. You opted to close your eyes and pray that morning came quickly.
You initially had no intention to return to the little church on the coast, but it wasn’t as if you had anything better to do. As you crested the hill you saw Zeke standing by the cliff, staring out into the ocean. The back of his shirt was speckled with red stains. A cloud of cigarette smoke lingered around him caught in the cold, morning air.
You walked towards him, your hands shoved in your pockets.
“Hi,” you said.
He perked up and side-eyed you.
“Yeah?”
“I just wanted to say good morning.”
“Well, you said it.”
He tossed his cigarette off the cliff and headed towards the church. You trailed after, embarrassed that you reached out to him. Entering the church you were pleasantly surprised to see Eren sitting in the pews. You grabbed a seat in the same row as him but kept your distance.
“C’mere. No need to sit so far away, sister.”
You scooched over to him. He was much more personable than his brother or his father.
“Sister? Wow. So formal.”
He blushed.
“Sorry. It’s a habit I can’t break for the life of me.”
“It’s fine… brother.”
He snickered. “You know for the longest time I used to say it like Hulk Hogan.”
“You mean like, ‘Bruhthurrrrr!’” You mimicked.
“Ha! Exactly.”
“What was your favorite verse? Austin 3:16?”
“You know it,” he said cheekily.
Service began and Grisha spent the majority of the time comparing various atrocities to the Book of Revelation. It was more militant than his previous sermons. Never before had he ever dropped a reference to a “holy war”, but today that seemed to be the running theme.
To say it made you uncomfortable would be the least. But still you found yourself hanging on his every word. You pictured yourself charging through a broken landscape. Flames ripping through cracks in the earth. Locusts fluttering about. The stench of carnage filling your nose. A hideous, rotted beast rising from a bottomless pit. The bodies of sinners heaped high into the heavens; those still cursed with life gnawing on their tongues in agony. It was horrific, but you felt pride. If you lived a virtuous enough life you could fight in God’s army and live in His light eternally.
You were ripped away from your nightmarish fantasy when Eren’s sweet voice blessed your ears.
“Was the sermon that boring?”
“What? No, I was just thinking about it.”
“It’s all good. Trust me, I zone out the second my dad starts talking.”
You wished that was what you had done. You missed the mindlessness you could indulge in on Sundays. Ever since you started attending service you were hypervigilant, bordering on too aware. You stretched your arms over your head and stood up, hoping it would quiet your disturbing thoughts.
“Shit. I should’ve introduced myself earlier. But, uh, my name’s Eren.”
“I know,” you laughed, and then told him yours.
“Now that’s a pretty name.”
Your face grew warm upon hearing his compliment. “Well, I’m off,” you said cheerfully.
“It was nice talking to you. Happy to be around a normal person for once.
You giggled. If only you were a normal person. You bid Eren farewell and headed towards the door. Just as you were about to step outside the threshold of the church, you felt a tap on your shoulder. You turned around to see Grisha.
“Where are you off to, lamb?”
“Home.”
“That’s too bad.”
“Why?”
“I was hoping you’d come back to the parsonage so I could properly apologize for my… indiscretion.”
You had tried so hard to forget about him jerking off while talking on the phone with you, how he punctured you with the sword of his mouth. You knew you should’ve declined his invitation and set a boundary between the two of you. But you were smitten despite how much the pastor unsettled you.
“Okay,” you relented.
Once in his office he collapsed onto the couch, resting the back of his hand on his forehead.
“So,” you began. “Are you going to apologize?”
“I think you should be the one apologizing to me.”
“What? But you said—”
“I’m well aware of what I said.” He fixed his gaze on you. “However, you tempted me to share in your plagues.”
“I didn’t do shit. You’re the one that called me up.”
“You didn’t have to answer.”
“You called me three times!”
He exhaled deeply.
“I suppose I am partially to blame.”
“Jesus fucking Christ! You’re fully to blame,” you seethed.
“Why are you being so hostile? Come, sit beside me.”
For whatever reason you did as you were told. You sat next to him and stared at your shoes like a child about to be reprimanded.
“I feel as though you solely exist to tempt me, like some sort of divine punishment. Tell me, lamb, are you clothed with the sun or are you a whore that sits on many waters?”
“I don’t know…” You thought about the lewd thoughts that often plagued your mind. “I guess the latter.”
“I see,” he said, placing his hand on your thigh. “I can save you, if you let me.”
“And how exactly would you do that?” You asked, glancing down at the bulge growing in his pants.
He squeezed your thigh and turned to face you. His eyes were dark with ardor. He only ever looked this passionate when he was preaching.
“I’d rather show than tell, lamb.”
He started to unzip his pants, revealing his hard cock. You turned away and stared at the wall. He latched onto your wrist and placed your hand on it. You prayed for God to stop your underwear from getting soaked.
“Are you afraid?” He asked.
“No. But this… isn’t right.”
“You have nothing to fear. I’m your savior. You should trust me.”
You faced him. He didn’t look untrustworthy. What would he gain from pulling the wool over your eyes? You needed to be saved. You were lucky this man had decided you were worth his time. You squeezed his cock, watching his reaction. He blushed.
“There’s no reason to be shy,” he cooed.
He repositioned himself so he was lying on his back, pulling you on top of him. He lifted up your dress and pulled your underwear off, throwing them to the side. You had taken to wearing prairie dresses with high necklines and white ruffled collars to fit in amongst the congregants. Oddly enough this made the men pay more attention to you, notably Grisha.
He guided his cock inside you. Your breath hitched as it stretched out your tight cunt. It had been years since anyone had fucked you. You gritted your teeth and breathed heavily through your nose.
“Am I hurting you?” He groaned while thrusting into you.
“Yes!” You yelped.
He placed his hands under your ass, lifting you up, leaving only the tip inside. You braced yourself by putting your hands on his tense shoulders. He peered up at you and tucked a lock of your hair behind your ear.
“That wasn’t my intention,” he grunted.
He pulled your body closer, keeping it flush to his, and started to ease his cock back inside you. You held his face in your hands and kissed him. Your lips overlapped his in a desperate attempt at intimacy. You wanted him to feel your passion and love, that you weren’t some trollop that waltzed in to simply whore herself out.
He slowly pushed his cock deeper into you, his hips rocking ever so slightly. You whined through the kiss before breaking it.
“Fuck. It’s too much,” you whined. “Can you get on top?”
He was more than happy to oblige, lifting you up and resting you on your back while his cock continued to throb inside you.
“How’s that?” He asked breathily.
“Much better,” you moaned.
He smiled and lifted your dress up higher. He pushed down the cups of your bra and groped your breasts.
“Harder,” you mewled.
He pinched one of your pert nipples, letting out a tiny laugh as you squealed. You grabbed ahold of his ass, driving his cock deeper into you. A few tears fell from your eyes as he bottomed out, his cock ramming into your cervix. You bit down on your bottom lip and tried to hold back an agonized moan. But the ache invading your body needed to be heard.
Grisha’s thrusts grew more erratic and his groans became louder. He had been starved of intimacy for so long. His desperate hymn radiated through your body. You found yourself being overcome by ecstasy. It was as if God was shining His holy light down on you. It took everything out of you to start babbling the Lord’s Prayer.
You happened to glance out the window and saw Zeke standing outside, partially obscured by a Monterey cypress. You knitted your brow and swallowed hard, nearly choking on your spit.
“Wh—what is it? Am I still hurting you?” He asked, thrusting away, his eyes now shut as rapture consumed him.
You squinted as if it would give you a better look at Zeke.
“It’s nothing. Keep going.”
You hugged him closer as his cock leaked precum inside you. You prayed Zeke couldn’t see anything. But alas you were wrong. Zeke had adjusted his position, revealing that he was fucking his fist. His pants hung around his ankles. It made you nauseous and you felt as if your entire body went cold, like your blood turned to ice.
“I—I’m going to wash away your sins with my seed.”
You felt disgusted by everything: Zeke masturbating to the sight of his father fucking you, Grisha’s ostentatious assumption his cum was a sacrament, the fact you still found yourself reeling from the rapturious pleasure of Grisha’s cock slamming into your cervix. He dropped one of his hands and rubbed your clit, leaving you a quivering mess.
You wanted to hold back, to have him come inside you and walk out of his office with some form of dignity. But it was impossible. Your unstoppable moans flooded the room.
“That’s it, lamb. Let it all go,” he grunted as he came, fucking his cum into your cunt.
Once he was finished he got up and tucked his cock back into his pants. You were rendered immoveable, body glued to the couch.
“It’s time for you to go,” he said solemnly, zipping and buttoning his pants.
You wordlessly tucked your breasts back into your bra and pulled your dress down. You scurried out of his office, passing Eren on your way out.
“Oh shit! Hey!”
“I’m leaving,” you mumbled, not actually hearing what he said.
“What?” He asked, his eyes filling with concern.
“I have to go!” You cried out while speed walking away from the parsonage.
You quickly glanced over your shoulder and saw him chasing after you, his long hair flowing in the wind.
“Wait up, sister,” he shouted.
“Leave me alone! Just… please. Don’t. I—I just wanna go home,” you said, having regained some level of composure.
You stopped; your feet felt like they weighed a thousand pounds. You felt Grisha’s come seep out of your cunt, dripping down the inside of your thigh.
“Did something happen to you?” He asked.
You shivered.
“No. No. No,” you repeated mindlessly.
He narrowed his eyes, his stare fixated on the rumpled state of your dress.
“Who was it?” He asked.
“No one. It was nothing,” you mumbled as your legs finally found it in them to move.
“Are you going to get home okay? I can drive you back to town.”
“Stop! I don’t even know you. I think I can manage on my own.”
Part of you wanted to collapse in his arms and weep, but you were sick of relying on these men for comfort, for a smidgen of solace. Eren didn’t seem to pick up on your distaste. He took a few more steps towards you before stopping.
“Tell me, sister. Was it my dad?”
“Didn’t I say it was no one?” You seethed, clenching your jaw.
You didn’t return to church the following Sunday or the Sunday after that even though Grisha incessantly called you. Instead you watched a live feed of the service at Hope Springs Eternal. You were able to lose yourself in the pompous extravagance. It wasn’t particularly pleasant. The sermon was the typical “poor people are poor because they don’t love God enough.” But it was nice to not hear rants about fighting in God’s army. Plus you thoroughly enjoyed roasting your old church.
“Idiots,” you muttered, shoving your hand in a box of cereal. “That guy doesn’t love God enough because his toupee isn’t on straight.”
You laughed with a mouthful of cereal and nearly choked on your giggle fit.
However you grimaced when the pastor brought out a rattlesnake. His eyes rolled into the back of his head and he spoke in tongues.
“What is this? Fear Factor?”
Suddenly the crowd erupted into a shrieking mass of glossolalia, throwing themselves at the ground, as the pastor held the snake above his head. You were shocked to see the church had become such a spectacle while you were gone.
“Well that’s unsettling,” you said, turning off your television. “I hope the snake is okay.”
Pastor Grisha’s sermons suddenly seemed reasonable in comparison to whatever the fuck it was you’d just witnessed. You stared at your phone and picked it up. It felt like a stone in your hand. You called Grisha, hoping he wouldn’t answer.
Much to your disappointment he picked up on the first ring.
“Hi,” you said solemnly.
“My precious lamb, have you decided to come crawling back?”
You clenched your fists, your fingernails leaving valleys in your palm.
“Do you guys speak in tongues and handle snakes?”
“I run a church. Not a sideshow.”
“I take that as a no then.”
“That’s all ceremonial grandeur. It’s not of God.”
“Isn’t it in The Bible?”
“Much of The Bible is not to be taken literally.”
“Fair enough…”
“Why do you ask?”
You sighed. “Hope Springs Eternal livesteams their servi—”
“Heretical bastards!”
“Don—Don’t you broadcast your sermons on television? How is that any different?”
“Because I’m right goddammit! Even if I wanted to stop, I couldn't! It’s God’s will! How am I supposed to deny his desires?!”
“I—”
“What I do… What I do is necessary. It’s my duty. Only I can lead us on the virtuous path.”
“What about your sons?”
“Zeke’s more than capable, but he let his brain get eaten away by lust.”
“What about Eren?”
“He’s charming, but a lost cause. Noncommittal. He’s not a firm believer.” He exhaled. “It has to be me. There’s no other option.”
He sounded almost wistful, like he was being forced to do these things against his own will.
“It is how things are and have to be,” he mumbled. “I wasn’t exactly interested in this, but when God calls you don’t bury your head in the sand.”
“I guess. But you could stop. You know that, right? It doesn’t have to be like this.”
“Who am I to question the Hand of God, lamb? I’m a mere man. If He isn’t guiding me, I’ll stray. It’s—It’s hard… for me. You’d know that better than anyone.”
You held your breath. You were used to a level of opaqueness he operated under. To hear Grisha express doubt in the Lord bothered you. He was supposed to be different, to be stronger than the average pastor. One that was steadfast in his beliefs.
“I’ve missed seeing you,” he sighed.
“I doubt that.”
“It’s true. I need you. I’m lost without you.”
“I thought I was a temptress, a whore sitting on many waters or whatever.”
“Hush, lamb. Promise me you’ll come back next Sunday,” he pleaded.
“I’ll think about it,” you hissed before hanging up.
You were pissed Grisha’s plea managed to convince you. You showed up at the church the next Sunday dressed in a plain black prairie dress, something that wouldn’t make you stand out amongst the plain clothed men. You took your seat in the pews and didn’t make eye contact with anyone.
A familiar voice coming from behind you. “Hi!”
“Hey, Eren,” you said, a small smile crossing your face.
“It’s nice to see you, sister. I was worried about you.”
“I’m alright. No reason to be concerned.”
You wanted to placate him, but your tone was too clipped. It was like you were brandishing a knife after every word. Eren’s green eyes were tinged with worry, but he grinned and took a seat beside you. Service began as it usually did, but you noticed Zeke and the camera equipment were nowhere to be found.
“Are you guys not filming anymore?” You asked in a hushed tone.
“Hm? Oh, not today.”
You raised an eyebrow and decided not to think about it.
Grisha’s sermon ended up being much more benign. There was little talk of violence and not a single reference to God’s wrath. As he preached you zoned out.
“Am I boring you, sister?” Grisha asked pointedly.
You perked up and shook your head. He glared at you briefly before resuming the sermon. Nothing weird was happening, but there was an oddness in the air, like something unseen to only you was brewing. Even Eren started to look a little antsy.
“Who here needs to be healed?” Grisha suddenly asked.
You turned to Eren, but his eyes were fixated on the floor. Your body went cold. No one was speaking. Everyone’s eyes were trained on you. You sunk down into the pew, hoping people would forget you were even there. Out of sight, out of mind.
“Sister,” Grisha suddenly said.
You weren’t used to him addressing you in a formal way.
“Yes,” you said cheerfully. You wanted to pull the wool over everyone’s eyes. Maybe if you were pleasant, the mood in the church would change.
“Do you need to be healed?”
“Nope. I, uh, I think I’m good.”
“Who here thinks our sister needs to be healed?”
The men all raised their hands at once. You were aghast to see Eren slowly raising his hand, eyes still focused on the floor in front of him.
“Seriously?” You asked in a hushed voice.
He gave you nothing in response.
“I think we’ve come to a consensus,” Grisha said, leaving the pulpit. “Let’s gather around our sister.”
Everytime he said “sister” you felt like you swallowed a razor blade. You hated hearing it, but speaking up was thankless. It wouldn’t do anything. You were outnumbered. The men gathered around you, all with rather blank looks on their faces. Their eyes were flat and shark-like.
“You guys can’t be serious.”
One of the men placed their hand on your shoulder. The others followed suit and placed their hands on your shoulders, back, and the top of your head. You directed a pleading stare towards Eren.
“It’s fine. They’re not gonna hurt you,” he muttered.
You wanted to attack him like a wild animal, rip into his skin and pluck out his pretty, green eyes. You barely knew him, but somehow this was the ultimate betrayal.
“Fucker,” you said under your breath.
You breathed deeply to calm yourself. It was true. The men weren’t hurting you, at least on a physical level. The church was silent other than your labored breathing and the offshore winds occasionally rattling the windows.
“Do you have anything you’d like to repent for?” Grisha asked.
You flared your nostrils. “No.”
“Are you sure?” A drunk parishioner slurred.
You refused to answer.
“Are you sure?” Grisha repeated.
“Yes,” you answered in your most authoritative tone.
“You made eyes at me during service,” one of the men said. “You gave me a look.”
“What? I don’t even know you.”
“I saw you do it,” another one said.
Another tightened his grip on your shoulder.
“We all saw,” he rumbled.
The door of the church flung open. For a brief moment relief came over you.
“Sorry I’m late—Oh, so we are doing this,” Zeke said, fastening the last few buttons on his shirt.
“You’re just in time,” Grisha said cheerfully.
“Is this really necessary?” Zeke asked, surveying the situation.
“Do you doubt me?” Grisha asked.
Zeke nervously scratched behind his ear. “No.”
He took a seat on the floor near the door and stared at his feet much like Eren did. You wanted to scream, but you were frozen by God’s apparent will. The men continued their chorus of “I saw you” and proceeded to accuse you of other minor offenses you never committed. Every so often you denied the accusations, but after a while your mind began to slip. Had you given a lusty stare to someone? You couldn’t be sure anymore.
“I did it,” you finally said dejectedly. “All of it.”
The men removed their hands and went back to their seats. Grisha sighed and returned to the pulpit.
“Don’t you feel better now? Don’t you feel cleansed?”
You mindlessly nodded.
“Did you finally let the Lord into your hideous heart?”
Again, you nodded. The service ended with little fanfare and everyone left quickly. You found yourself tethered to your seat, unable to move lest you be accused of heresy. Eren remained as well.
“I’m sorry,” he whispered.
“No. You’re not… But it’s fine.”
“It’s not fine.”
“Well then why didn’t you help me? You were right there.”
“I don’t know.”
“Is it because I deserve it? Am I that bad?”
“No.”
“Then why did they do that to me?!” You shouted.
“I don’t kn—”
“You don’t seem to know anything, brother.”
“I said I was sorry.”
“Sorry doesn’t mean shit!” Tears welled up in your eyes and your throat burned from yelling after being so quiet. “I… Fuck!”
You kicked the pew in front of you. You didn’t know what to do. Eren probably was sorry. He probably didn’t have much pull over Grisha. What could he have done? You knew you were innocent; none of those sins were yours. The parishioners hadn’t even brought up your daliences with Grisha. Though it’s not like they’d have any information that would make the pastor look bad.
“I don’t think this will make you feel any better. But it’s happened to me a lot. I know how it feels.”
He scooched closer to you and cleared his throat.
“My relationship with God is complicated. It has been since my mom died.”
“That doesn’t make me feel sorry for you,” you hissed. “Everyone has a complicated relationship with God.”
He kept talking. “It usually goes longer. The last time it happened to me it was two hours of getting told I was useless. A drug addict. One guy even called me the Antichrist which made my dad stop everything. He ended up punching him.”
“That’s horrible.”
“It sounds worse than it actually is, sister.”
You couldn’t imagine suffering through an hour consumed by hands laying upon you. You were angry Eren downplayed it, trying to act like it wasn’t all that bad. It was a horrific experience. Not one you’d ever want to return to. You stood up and walked away. You didn’t bother saying goodbye to Eren. He was too lost in his own mind.
Once outside you saw Zeke standing near the edge of the cliff smoking as usual. You made your way over to him. The sunlight danced behind low hanging clouds, occasionally illuminating him in a heavenly way. Instead of the usual scowl, he gave a solemn, “Hello.”
You hated how much he looked like his father. It made you want to be mean to him.
“Are you alright?” He asked, taking a drag off his cigarette.
“I guess. I don’t know. I can’t tell yet.”
“Ah, yeah. That’s the worst part. Don’t worry,” he said, stretching his arms. “You’ll realize how awful it was when you’re trying to sleep tonight.”
You were already plotting how to induce insomnia. Zeke placed his hand on your shoulder. You were too exhausted to flinch. He took a few steps closer until you were finally in his arms, your face buried in his neck. He rubbed your back and you proceeded to sob. You felt silly for breaking down in a stranger’s arms, but Zeke was there. He was tangible, something you could hold onto.
His hands trailed down your back, resting them on your ass.
“Need a distraction?” His breath was hot against your ear.
You sniffled. You could feel his semi-hard cock through his pants.
“I guess. I—I have no idea how you could help me though,” you muttered dejectedly.
“Trust me, sister. I have plenty of ideas.”
He tightened his grip on your ass and rubbed his erection against you. You stared out over his shoulder at gentle waves licking the shore. You wanted to lose yourself in his broad-shouldered embrace.
“You can do whatever you want,” you mewled.
He let go of your ass and held onto your face by the jaw. His fingers were calloused, but the roughness of his touch was spirituous. He forced his leg between your thighs. He had a sick grin on his face. You tried to ignore it as you rubbed up against his leg. Instead you focused on how good his body felt on your clit. You dragged your throbbing cunt up and down his thigh, your breath hitching when the friction became too much.
He forced you to look him in the eyes as you pleasured yourself against him. You wanted to find kindness in his gaze but there was none, just lust. You started to unbutton his shirt while he hurriedly unzipped his pants. You kissed him, biting down on his bottom lip. He groaned and pulled away.
“No biting,” he chastised.
You frowned and lied down in the grass. You hiked up your dress, revealing your glistening folds. Zeke got on top of you, stroking his cock. It was girthy like his father’s, but more veiny and it lacked any sort of curve. You guided it inside you, watching Zeke’s reaction as he was greeted by your tight cunt. He looked so lecherous, so hungry for you.
“Oh God,” you moaned.
Zeke slowly thrusted; his cock filled your cunt. He stared down at you, eyes partially obscured by his glasses.
“How does that feel, sister?”
“Like heaven.”
“Ca—can I hit you?”
The idea of his hand gracing your face thrilled you to no end. You welcomed any sensation that would make you forget the numerous hands that had previously invaded your body.
“Please.”
His hand was swift across your face, leaving a stinging pain in its wake.
“Again,” you pleaded, stroking his cheek.
He was more than happy to oblige. He thrusted his cock deeper inside you and slapped you again. You pulled him into a kiss, pushing your tongue past his teeth. His tongue tasted of tobacco. The woody, sour taste overtook your mouth.
His hands roaming your body was a blessing. His touch healed the wounds left behind the parishioners. You never wanted to let him go. Your fingers were tangled in his soft, flaxen hair. You twirled a lock in between your fingers and tugged on it. He let out a muted yelp you soon swallowed. He broke the kiss, panting as he bottomed out. Your body writhed underneath his, swimming in the shadow of this saint.
“How does it feel, sister?” He asked, holding you down.
“Good,” you gasped.
He grabbed ahold of your jaw again, his grey eyes tunneling holes through yours. You wanted to live in his light, until your body rotted away into dust. You tightened your walls around him. He groaned, his hips bucking against your limp body. You were putty in his hands.
You slid his suspenders off and yanked down his pants. You held onto his plush ass, pulling him towards you so his cock kissed your cervix. His hips seemed to skip a beat as his cock leaked precum inside your cunt. A needy moan fell from his lips and he shut his eyes.
“Can I come inside you?” He quickly asked.
You eagerly nodded. He let out a few desperate whimpers as he drove his cock in you, your fluids intermingling. He was panting harder, his cheeks now a pretty pink. He bucked his hips as his cock shot cum into the depths of your cunt.
“Do you like that, sister?” He asked, fucking you harder.
“Yes,” you squealed.
Once he finished he slid his cock out of you and lowered himself down to your cunt. He lapped at the cum seeping out of it, tongue flicking your clit.
“Say my name when you come,” he ordered.
You dug your fingers into the grass as your body quivered. Zeke ran his hands up and down your legs as he sucked his cum out of you, the lurid noise harmonizing with the waves.
“Zeke,” you mewled as you saw white.
You felt like you were ascending as your body squirmed against his face, his beard tickling the inside of your thighs. You were too lost in your orgasm to hear the footsteps stomping through the grass. Zeke looked up at you, smiling. He rested his head on your thigh and sighed dreamily.
“Are you interested in doing anything else, sister?”
You ignored his question and posed your own. “Why were you jerking off while I was fucking your father?”
His gaze hardened.
“It’s not as if I was looking at him.” He kissed your thigh and took on a kinder tone. “It’s not our fault none of us know how to behave around women… It doesn’t help that we all have a sick crush on you.”
“How are you gonna solve that problem, huh?”
“I did talk to you first. If you belong to any of us, it’s me.”
“I don’t belong to any of you,” you said, unable to hide your disgust.
“Don’t you want to be mine?”
You rustled his hair. He was cute in a tragic sense. It was strange to see such a domineering man rendered down to an endearing puddle of goo. You alternated between wanting to toss him off the cliff, and marrying him.
You were ripped from your peace by the sound of rustling grass growing closer and closer. Zeke glanced up and his face fell. You craned your head back and saw Grisha standing there, clutching his worn down bible to his chest.
“How could you?” Grisha lamented; his question directed at you.
Zeke sat up and pulled your dress back down.
“Are you jealous?” He taunted.
Grisha glared at his son. Although Zeke’s expression was haughty, it had a tinge of uneasiness. It was warranted. The pastor launched his bible at his son, hitting him square in the nose. Blood seeped from it, staining his white shirt red.
“You’re going to hell for that,” Zeke said, covering his nose with his hand.
“Well I’ll see you there, you disgraceful whoremonger!”
You frowned at the notion of you being a whore. It was an accusation you never got used to. You weren’t chaste by any means, but this was the most action you had in awhile.
“Did you not lie with her too?” Zeke asked, standing up and stepping over you to get closer to his father. “I saw you. I bore witness.”
Grisha blushed, clearly horrified by this revelation. “I—I was saving her!”
“You have a really funny way of saving people then.”
You grew tired of their bickering. You found your underwear hiding amongst the cat grass and slipped them on. You bounded off to the path that led down to the beach. Neither of the men noticed you left.
The wind had calmed down, making the journey less precarious. You kicked off your shoes and dug your toes into the sand. Such a simple thing and yet it was the best you felt in years. You walked closer towards the ocean, digging your feet deeper into the sand with every step. Once the water licked your heels you swam out, submerging yourself in a mellow wave. You held your breath as it washed over you. You dove deeper as the currents pulled you further from the shore.
Salt water weaseled its way into your eyes, killing any sense of comfort you found in the lull of the waves. You let your body float to the surface. Resting on your back, you stared up at the overcast sky. You looked like a pathetic version of Ophelia, madness driving you out into the sea. It was hard to be serene while coughing. The salt burned your throat and left your tongue numb.
You were decidedly less glamorous than any Millais painting. But that didn’t matter. You couldn’t care less about how you appeared. Maybe this was pathetic. Maybe you were wading in madness. But was that a bad thing? You’d be in good company. Even Jesus’s family and followers thought he was insane on occasion, possessed by demons, riddled with paranoia. And yet he was a paragon of holiness, of a just life.
The sun peeked out from behind the low-hanging clouds, a little beam of sunlight bled through. The first you’d seen in awhile. It looked like glitter ebbing along with the waves.
“Nice,” you whispered.
Your phone rang constantly. You thought about blocking Grisha's number, but you wanted to hear the desperation in his voice and if he still thought he could save you. Much to your disappointment he never left a single voicemail.
Nothing seemed to completely sever the attachment you had to them. You thought about Zeke fucking you in a field constantly, though on occasion you imagined he was Eren. You found yourself missing the brunette. He was always nice to you. His only major misstep being that he didn’t help you when you were assaulted.
Twinges of resentment remained a plague. You knew Eren was just as much a victim as you. But there remained a pervasive sense of betrayal. It was such a strong feeling for someone you barely knew.
There was some relief knowing they were no closer to God than you.
Eventually one early Sunday morning, your curiosity got the better of you and you answered when Grisha called you for the umpteenth time. You reclined on your couch, watching Hope Springs Eternal’s live stream with the volume turned down.
“Did you call to jerk off to the sound of my voice?” You asked haughtily.
“What? No, sister. I’m not a pig.”
You were surprised to hear Eren’s voice.
“Oh… Hey? Why are you calling from your father’s phone?”
“Psh. My dad wishes he had his own phone. We all share the one in his office.”
“Okay. Uh, what’s up? Did something happen?”
He sighed. “No. I just miss talking to you.”
“I’m sure there are other parishioners to talk to.”
Eren paused. “Actually there aren’t any. My dad stopped opening up service to the public and kicked everyone out. We just do the TV thing now.”
“Why?”
“I don’t know. Last Sunday he said something about someone taking his lamb to the slaughter? And how he is not fit to be a shepherd because he tasted the waters of Babylon. I tried asking him about it, but he didn’t want me to bear his burden which I appreciate. But on the other hand, I’d like to know what the fuck is going on.”
You knitted your brow and asked, “How’s Zeke?”
“A disaster. He smokes inside now. I can’t remember the last time I saw him with a shirt on. And he’s been asking me for weed which is… I don’t mind sharing, but my tolerance is high. It takes a lot to calm this mess down.” He punctuated his sentence with a soft chuckle. “Also he films dad at a Dutch angle. I don’t know, sister. It’s all bad.”
You wanted to hug him, hold him close and like a vice.
“I guess I can stop by, if you want.”
“Really? You’d be down?”
“As long as I don’t see your father, I don’t mind. He’ll be busy preaching, right?”
“Yup!”
“I’ll see you in a few then.”
“Wow. Really? It’s okay if you don’t want to.”
You assured Eren it was no problem and hung up.
Looking through your wardrobe, you hated yourself for getting rid of all your secular clothing. You burned it all in a religious fury, replacing everything with long dresses, with high necklines accentuated with oversized collars, and long sleeves. Your most plain one was still stiff with ocean water. You ended up settling on one in your favorite color.
When you arrived you expected the church to be in ruins. It was a rather hyperbolic thought. But given what Eren told you, your mind felt free to wander down darkened paths. You didn’t dare approach the church proper, instead heading for the back door of the parsonage.
The tide was low, the stench ever present. You dry heaved every couple seconds. You stepped closer to the cliff and saw the rotting carcasses of fish. You hadn’t heard anything about a major die off. You pinched your nostrils shut and swallowed the spit collecting in your mouth.
“It’s gross, ain’t it?” Eren said, walking over to you. “Let’s get inside.”
He held the door open for you and shut it tight. The sound of door slamming made you jump.
“I’m sorry. I’m tryna keep the smell out as best I can,” he said sheepishly.
“It’s okay. I’d rather you be aggressive towards inanimate objects than smell death.”
“You want coffee? I just made a pot. Or do you like tea? I can make tea. Or we can have both. Best of both worlds. Like Hannah Montana,” he rattled off nervously. He shut his eyes tight and sighed deeply, very much aware of how silly he sounded.
“Coffee is fine.”
“How do you take it?”
You explained in great detail how you like your coffee. Eren was shaky and needed the specificities even if your request was on the simpler side. You took a seat at the dining table, one he clearly built. He carefully prepared your cup and placed it in front of you with a very prideful grin on his face. You thanked him and took a sip. It was perfect.
You wasted no time and started to question Eren on the current state of the church the moment he sat at the table.
“Pastor Grisha kicked everyone out?”
Eren winced, hearing you call his father that.
He took a sip of his coffee. “Yeah. He won’t tell me anything though. He does his sermons and then he spends the rest of his time in his office, muttering weird shit like ‘Where did I go wrong?’ and ‘He slaughtered my little lamb.’’
You snicked. “He’s talking about me.”
“What makes you so sure, sister?”
“I fucked your father, brother.”
“I know,” he answered casually.
“And I fucked your brother. Your father caught us in the little clearing by the cliff.”
“I told Zeke not to do that.” Eren said, the vibrancy of his eyes completely dulled.
“You knew?”
“Duh.. He’s my brother. I know everything about him.”
“Did he tell you he jerked off while your dad fucked me?”
“Unfortunately. He… He was desperate and he really likes you. I’m not saying it was right. He’s got some shit to work through.”
“You really care about him, huh?”
“Why wouldn’t I, sister? I love him,” he said cheerfully.
“Where is he?”
“Probably asleep. Service doesn’t start for another hour and a half.”
“I’m very much awake,” his voice boomed from down the hall.
He stepped out of his room clothes in only a tiny pair of grey underwear that left little to the imagination. His back was covered in spindly welts. He had no shame, not an inkling of it. He sauntered into the room and took a seat next to Eren. He glanced back and forth at the two of you. A skimpy joint was tucked behind his ear.
“What’s she doing here?” He asked Eren.
“You can ask her yourself. She’s right there.”
Zeke turned his attention towards you. “Who invited you?”
Eren groaned. “I did. I wanted to hang out with her.”
“Oh yeah, I’m sure you’re just ‘hanging out.’” He said, laughing.
“I have no one to talk to! Dad's on the path to being one of those embarrassing street preachers that scream about the end of days. And you never wear clothes and only ever talk to me when you want weed!”
“Do you need a hug?” Zeke asked, his tone comically serious.
“What?! No. Go put pants on.”
“Fine. I’ll conform, if that’ll calm your ass down,” he said.
“Is he high?” You asked.
“Terminally.”
You mouthed a “wow”.
“I can’t decide what pants,” he yelled down the hall. “Come help me.”
Eren sighed. “Let’s humor him.”
The two of you made your way to Zeke’s room. It was rather barren. He had a nice sized bed, with crisp white sheets and a turmeric colored quilt folded at the foot of it. He had a small desk made from birch wood stained a muted black. The chair was the same, though a small pillow softened the seat. His closet door rested on the ground. Zeke explained it fell off the hinges and didn’t care enough to fix it. His room looked like something out of the past. The only modern thing in it was the camera equipment.
Eren frowned and lightly kicked Zeke’s broken door.
“I said I would fix this for you, dumb ass.”
“You’re so cruel. Now! Let’s get down to business.”
He grabbed a lighter off his desk and lit the joint he had behind his ear.
“What about the pants?” You asked, trying not to stare at his cock.
“The what?” He waved his hand as if that made the previous conversation disappear. “Who cares? Here, take a hit.”
“I’m okay,” you demurred.
“Aw, come on? Do you not like me anymore?”
You rolled your eyes. “No. I just feel like getting high in a parsonage goes against God’s will.”
He patted your head and passed the joint to Eren. Zeke sat down on his bed and gestured for you to join him. Briefly you resisted but he was too handsome and too willing. Maybe it was God’s will for you to merely sit beside him.
Eren took a seat next to you while puffing on the joint hanging from his lips. He passed it back to Zeke.
“I’m good for now,” he relayed.
Zeke stubbed the joint out in an ashtray and opened a window to let the smoke air out. The haze that had once permeated the room slowly ebbed out into the cold wind. You tried to focus on that instead of Zeke’s cock which appeared to be a little stiff.
“I know you’re looking, sister.”
“I am not!”
Eren laughed. “If you want I can, uh, leave you two alone.”
“No way. I’m here to see you, remember?”
Zeke rested his head on your shoulder.
“What are you saying? You don’t want to see me?”
You rustled his hair. “No. That’s hardly what I meant.”
Eren wrapped his arm around you, pulling you close to him. There was a territorial tinge to his eyes. You struggled to stifle your laughter. All of the men in this family seemed to be desperate for your attention, even Eren who on occasion seemed like a normal guy.
Zeke looked over at Eren and narrowed his eyes.
“Are you jealous I found my way to her before you?”
“Are you jealous that dad fucked her first?”
Zeke scowled. You sighed deeply and tried to ignore your attraction to them. It was a thankless task.
“Do you want to lay with me, brother?” You asked on the verge of hysterics, playing up the religious pleasantries.
Eren blushed.
“He does,” Zeke said as he sprawled out across your lap. “He told me.”
Eren was staring out across the room, desperately trying to ignore Zeke and you.
“Is that true?”
He ran his hands through his long, dark hair, the silky tendrils finding their way between his fingers.
“Yeah. Happy?”
You gazed at Eren. Your vision blurred around him; he was all you could focus on. You carefully slipped your hand under his suspenders and ran it down one of his pecs. He shivered at your touch. You rubbed his delicate nipple with your thumb.
“Get on top of him,” Zeke suggested, his head in your lap. “I’ll eat your ass if you do it, sister.”
Eren’s eyes widened. The prospect of Zeke eating your ass was very appealing. As you went to straddle Eren, Zeke grabbed your shoulder.
“Not here. The office.”
“What?! No,” you exclaimed.
“Would it make you feel dirty because that’s where you fucked our father?”
“What if he catches us?” You panicked.
“Don’t worry about it. Your brother isn’t going to let anything bad happen to you, okay?” Zeke cooed.
Eren fake gagged and corralled you into Grisha’s office. Zeke’s words did not set you at ease.
You and Zeke took a seat on the couch. He rambled on about how Pastor Grisha now ended every sermon with “Jesus wept.” Eren took off his suspenders and his pants, folding them up neatly. He stood still for a moment, caught up in his own thoughts. You were getting impatient listening to Zeke ramble on. Your desire to fuck Eren was unbearable. All your attention was focused on him.
“Alright. I’m rea—Jesus Christ! Show some restraint!” Eren shouted.
You looked over at Zeke who at some point took off his underwear. He had a smug grin on his face. His cock was standing straight up, veiny and thick as ever. He was raring to go and you hadn’t even noticed.
“I don’t like to waste time,” he responded.
You and Eren both were a little perturbed, but not enough to turn back. Lust flooded your core; you could feel it bubbling up your throat. Zeke’s cock demanded your attention, the tip of it like a red beacon. You leaned in a little closer to him and cupped his balls, squeezing them with your gentle touch. You rubbed them, your grip tightening. Zeke exhaled and lazily threw his head back, eyes shut with pleasure. He beamed; you didn’t realize he was capable of such contentment.
“I’ll let Eren fuck you first, considering I already blessed you with my seed.”
“More like you filled her with your dirt,” Eren groused.
“Just let me have this,” Zeke complained.
If you weren’t so turned on, you would have stood up and walked out the door. But you were hopelessly tethered to them, your body devoted to their light. The holiness you perceived in them made it okay.
Eren gazed at you, his eyes as fertile as a verdant field. He held out his hand which you took and walked to his father’s desk. He kicked his father’s belongings off and gestured for you to sit on it. You happily obeyed. Your total willingness made him nervous. His hands quaked as he lifted your dress and peeled off your underwear.
“Over here,” Zeke said, holding his hand up.
Eren balled up your underwear and beaned them at Zeke’s face. Zeke didn’t seem to care and took an audible whiff. Eren gripped your hips and pulled you closer to the edge of the desk. He swiped his fingers against your cunt, coating them with your fluids.
“Open wide.”
You parted your lips and sucked them clean, running your tongue along the pads of his fingers. Your cunt throbbed, aching for his touch. He spread apart your labia and ran his cock down your slit. You whimpered as he slowly plunged it inside you.
“You guys are boring,” Zeke heckled. “She’d be ruined by now if I was fucking her.”
Eren let out an annoyed groan and started to thrust. Zeke reclined on the couch, happily watching the two of you. Eren grunted as your cunt hugged around him. His movements were slow and precise, lacking any of the urgency Zeke or Grisha’s had. You wondered if he was more experienced. You thought about him fucking his way through town, not a person untouched. He was certainly handsome enough.
“Pick up the pace,” Zeke said, stroking his cock.
Eren gritted his teeth. “For the love of God, please shut up. I’m begging you.”
“I’m getting bored though. I want to hear her squeal.”
“It’s not about what you want.” Eren turned his attention towards you. “Right?”
You nodded. Zeke sighed audibly and absent mindedly stroked his cock. You couldn’t help but stare; you wanted it in your mouth.
Eren took notice and began to fuck you harder, the length of his cock consuming your cunt.
“Don’t look at him,” he sneered, grabbing a hold of your face with his free hand. “Open your mouth again.”
You did as you were told. Eren spat directly in your mouth, the action full of derision. His saliva was sweet, tinged with coffee and citrus. He glared down at you and held you by the neck, his palm barely grazing your throat. His touch was gentle unlike his gaze. He clenched his jaw and thrust into you, groaning as he bottomed out. He erupted into a symphony of grunts and moans. His long hair hung in his face and he tried to tuck it behind his ear with no luck.
You heard Zeke laugh and get up off the couch, walking over. Zeke positioned himself behind Eren and reached over his shoulders to tuck his hair behind his ear.
“You looked like you were struggling,” Zeke cooed.
Eren let go of your throat and looked over his shoulder, mildly perturbed, and nodded.
“Why do you still have your shirt on, puritan?” Zeke coyly asked, as he started to unbutton it.
“You’re pushing your luck,” Eren grunted as he drove his cock into you.
Zeke snickered and helped Eren take off his button-down.
“Now it’s a party!” He cheered, resting his head on his brother’s shoulder.
Zeke gazed down at you, the weight of his body pressed up against Eren. You were a panting mess and tried to cover your face. Your shame always got the best of you. After all, you were a Christian. The brothers loved every second of it. Your whines and sighs were their favorite hymns. Zeke grabbed your hips and pulled you closer to Eren.
“Ow!” You yelped as Eren’s cock collided into your cervix.
You gazed up at the men lording over you, their eyes devouring every inch of you like a couple of jackals.
“I’m having a hard time focusing with your cock wedged between my ass,” Eren mumbled.
“Is it too weird?” Zeke asked, backing away.
“I have an idea,” you said, pulling Eren’s cock out of you.
You sat up and gestured for Zeke to sit behind you. He happily got up on the desk and sat behind you. You nestled in between his legs, letting his cock rest up against the small of your back.
“Why do you still have this on?” Zeke murmured in your ear.
His dexterity was impressive; he managed to quickly undo all the little buttons on your dress and pulled it over your head. You could feel his heaving chest up against your back, the hair tickling your spine. Eren unhooked your bra and tossed it to the side. He guided his cock back inside your weeping cunt and began to thrust.
“That feel good?” Eren grunted.
“Y—yes,” you choked out. “So good.”
Zeke groped your breasts, tweaking your nipples in between his rough fingers. Eren gave a smoldering glare to Zeke.
“What is it, brother?” Zeke asked sarcastically. “Did you want her all to yourself?”
Eren continued to force his length into your tormented cunt. He was blushing, still glaring at Zeke. His lush brown locks hung in his face. He almost looked like Jesus. Zeke went to speak, his eyebrows knitted with concern, but Eren interrupted him with a rough kiss, ripe with insatiable yearning. He continued to thrust wildly, delving his cock into your dripping cunt. Eren was close. His moans obscured by the kiss. Zeke pulled away and cleared his throat. You managed to catch a glimpse of his beet red face as you felt a spurt of warm fluid on your back.
“Sorry, sister,” he murmured.
Eren’s balls clapped up against your taint as he pounded away. Your body tensed up in anticipation of your orgasm. Eren’s cock filled every inch of your cunt, stretching it out as his hips grinded up against you. Your skin felt like it had electricity running through it, the Holy Spirit imbuing you with its light. Your body contorted in rapture as your vision faded. All you saw was light. You felt like God Himself.
Zeke lazily started to rub your clit, lubricating his finger with your fluids, which sent you to the brink. You were entrenched in ecstasy as your orgasm crashed over you. You tried to speak but all you could do was babble, the only coherent sound being you sputtering out Eren’s name.
Eren smirked and slowed down his pace, becoming more deliberate with his thrusts.
“You’re so fuckin’ tight,” he moaned.
He tossed his head back and filled you with his warm, milky cum. His hips bucked a few more times before he slumped forward, resting his head on your shoulder. You kissed the top of his head.
“I wanna worship you both,” you said breathily.
“Oh yeah?” Zeke asked.
Eren chuckled. “How do you plan on doing such a thing, sister?”
“Come down my throat.”
Zeke tumbled off the desk and quickly got to his feet. Eren helped you off and stood next to his brother. You got on your knees and gazed up at them. They were regal and beautiful, painfully so. You could bask in their presence for ages and never tire of it. Eren met your gaze and smiled. He stroked your cheek.
“Need some help?” Zeke asked Eren, pointing at his semi-hard cock.
Eren’s eyes widened.
“It’s cool if you don’t! I just thought since… You do realize you kissed me, right?”
Eren huffed. “Yes! I was hoping dad would walk in.”
“It’d really ruin him if he caught me jerking you off, especially so close to his precious, little lamb.”
Zeke had the mind of a demon. It disturbed you to no end, but it was just as alluring. Both of the brothers were blushing, their chests as pink as their cheeks. Eren looked down at you for guidance.
“Let him help,” you replied.
Your tone was marred with shame. You were still scared by the sin of it all, but traumatizing Pastor Grisha had its appeal after everything he had done. You needed your wanton desires to triumph, to horrify the holy man.
Eren let out a muted moan as Zeke gripped his cock. You eagerly watched as Zeke squeezed the length of it. Eren’s expression exuded an alluring agony. You lapped at his balls as Zeke hesitantly jerked him off. You rolled your tongue along the raphe, relishing in his rapturous groans. You flicked Eren’s aching cock with your tongue like a serpent.
Eren’s body relaxed a little, his shoulders not held as high. You sucked on his cock, savoring the precum dribbling from it. You worked in tandem with Zeke until Eren’s cock was throbbing and glistening with precum and spit.
“That wasn’t so bad, was it?” Zeke asked. “I’m not playing coy. Was that okay?”
“I guess,” Eren mumbled. “Yeah.”
“Let’s just think of it as a really fun Eucharist,” Zeke replied, hip checking his brother.
You stared up at Eren and Zeke, eager to service them. You took Zeke’s cock in your mouth and swirled your tongue around the tip. He patted your head as you sucked. Drool trickled from the corners of your mouth. Eren watched intently and stepped closer to you, his erection demanding your attention. You caressed it with a tender touch. His verdant gaze fixed on you, heavy with ardor. No one had ever looked at you like that before.
You released Zeke’s cock from your mouth and masturbated him using your free hand. Zeke’s gaze matched Eren’s, his grey eyes boring holes through yours. You beckoned them to stand closer together and frotted their cocks, suckling on the tips in between jerking them off.
The sound of heavy footsteps ripped you from your debauched trance.
“Did you hear that? I think I heard—”
“Suck us off at the same time,” Zeke pleaded.
Eren nervously looked to the side, but gave you a nod. You resumed holding their cocks together and eased them into your mouth. You felt like the corners of your mouth were going to tear as you struggled to fit them in.
“Atta girl,” Zeke purred.
The footsteps grew nearer.
“Boys? We ought to start service,” you heard Grisha call out.
“Zeke,” Eren muttered.
“Hm?” He said as he watched as tears ran down your cheeks.
Eren cupped Zeke’s face in his hands and kissed him as the knob of the door jiggled. It was ripe with desperation like the previous one. Eren bit down on Zeke’s bottom lip. Your cunt throbbed at the sight. You gagged and took their cocks out of your mouth, opting instead to jerk them off.
Grisha opened the door and stepped inside. He let out a little sigh before he noticed the depravity taking place.
“Oh God, no!”.
Eren laughed, breaking the kiss.
“Why? Why would you do this?!”
You lapped at Eren and Zeke’s cock, relishing in the pained shouts coming from the pastor. Zeke bucked his hips against your fist, fucking it furiously.
“Give me an answer! What did I do to either of you to deserve this?!”
The brothers ignored his cries. Zeke nuzzled his face into Eren’s neck and rubbed the back of your head.
“I’m close,” he whimpered. “Can I come on your face, sister?”
You nodded with a big smile on your face.
“How could you do this?” Grisha asked dejectedly, holding your gaze.
You didn’t answer. Grisha was of little importance. All you cared about were his sons.
“Sorry, father,” Zeke moaned as ropes of cum splattered across your cheeks.
“I—I raised you better than this!”
Eren clenched his fist while his erection dwindled.
“I don’t think you did,” Eren replied.
Grisha was stunned. “Excuse me?”
You let go of Eren’s cock and tried to wipe away Zeke’s cum with the back of your hand. You only proceeded to make a bigger mess. Zeke got to his knees and licked the remnants off your face.
“Look at us,” Eren said. “Zeke’s been convinced he’s going to Hell since he was four years old.”
“That has nothing to do with me! I never once told him such a thing.”
“It was implied,” Zeke whispered.
Eren was undeterred. “Did you know he flagellates himself? Or do you just not pay attention to the blood stains on the backs of his shirts?”
“I can’t be aware of every little thing that goes on, Eren. You… You could have told me!”
“And what good would that have done? Would you’ve cleaned his wounds at two in the morning? Let him sob in bed with you until sunrise?”
Zeke’s eyes had glazed over, not a hint of light to them.
“I… I d—don’t know,” the pastor sputtered.
“Exactly,” Eren laughed. “See, I didn’t even have to think about it. And you know what’s really fucked up? I didn’t learn that from you.”
“Eren, I…”
“And it’s not like I came out of this unscathed! Why do you think I’m high all the fucking time? I can’t deal with the overwhelming guilt an—and shame for not being whatever it is you wanted me to be.”
You wanted to run out of the office and leave everything behind. The situation was too much to bear. Eren’s rage, Zeke’s dissociation, the fact the three of you were still naked.
“I’m… going to go,” Zeke said suddenly.
He stood up and breezed past his father like he wasn’t even there. You remained a distressed heap on the floor.
“Eren, I’m sorry,” Grisha whispered.
“Oh my God,” Eren laughed again. “No. No, you’re not.”
Grisha’s face fell and he turned his attention towards you. You were to bear the brunt of his discontent.
“This is your doing, isn’t it?”
“Don’t try to pin this on her. She was just a catalyst.”
Grisha shook his head, resuming his previous pathetic visage. “My son, what can I do to make this right?”
Eren held out his hand to you and helped you up. You quickly found your dress and yanked it over your head.
“Nothing. You fucked up,” he responded, getting dressed. “You might as well find some poor woman to bear you a new son. Maybe you won’t fuck him up though you never seemed like the learning type.”
Eren led you past Grisha and out of the office.
“I know this is asking a lot, but could I stay with you for a bit?” Eren asked matter-of-factly.
You tried to shake yourself from your daze. Grisha’s words still haunted you.
“My apartment’s kinda small, but sure?”
“Thank you. I’m gonna go grab some stuff and then we can head out.”
Eren left you in the foyer to grab his keys from his room. Grisha approached you, desperate to convince you to stay with him.
“My precious lamb—”
“Don’t.”
“Please, I want to explain.”
“Stop talking to her,” Eren called out, pulling on a jacket.
Grisha glared at him momentarily before sighing and walking off. You didn’t think he’d give up on you so quickly. It was strange to see him so subdued and broken. You felt a twinge of sympathy, but it was gone as fast as it came. Grisha didn’t deserve any goodwill.
“You’ll be back,” he murmured, stepping into his office and slamming the door shut.
Eren and you set off for his car and hopped inside. It was a boring sedan, an older model from the early 90s, and it reeked of marijuana. He put his keys in the ignition as a smile crossed his face.
“You alright?” You asked.
He started the car and drove away from the parsonage, a few tears fell from his eyes.
“Yeah. It… It was a long time coming, but honestly I have no idea what I’m gonna do now.”
“We carry similar burdens. We can figure it out together.”
You liked the idea of healing with Eren, growing past your oppressive Christian upbringings and seeing the world anew. He rested his hand on your thigh and looked in his rear-view mirror.
“Is that?” He said, his green eyes popping out of his head.
It was Zeke, hauling ass after the car. He was sprinting like he was competing for a spot in the Summer Olympics. His form was astounding. He always looked like an athlete.
“Oh shit,” Eren said, stifling a laugh. “Hold on.”
He pulled over and waited until Zeke tapped on the window. Eren unlocked the car and Zeke crawled into the backseat. His shirt was barely buttoned and his fly was down. His flaxen hair was more askew than usual.
“I can’t believe you were going to leave me,” he said, catching his breath.
“You wandered off! I didn’t know where you went.” Eren scrambled for the right words. “I—I would’ve called you.”
“How? I don’t have a phone and neither do you.”
“Well, you’re here with us now and that’s all that matters,” you said, trying to settle the brothers down.
It seemed to work. Zeke exhaled and rested his head on the window, gazing out into the ocean. You weren’t sure how you’d make this all work. Your apartment had a single bedroom and not much space for two grown men, but you were determined to make it work. After everything you all had been through it was crucial you remained together, at least until the wounds healed. And the stinging guilt of turning your back on Pastor Grisha and God subsided.
“This is gonna sound kinda stupid, but… I don’t know what I would have done without you guys. I felt lost for so long. Going to church and hating myself for not being the most pious person. Getting wrapped up in your father’s crap. But you, uh, you both changed that. You saved me.” You tacked on a nervous laugh. “Somehow.”
The car fell silent and you felt silly for making such a claim.
Eren broke the silence. “We saved each other.”
#zeke yeager x reader#eren yeager x reader#grisha yeager x reader#zeke jaeger x reader#eren jaeger x reader#grisha jaeger x reader#snk smut#aot smut#attack on titan smut#shingeki no kyojin smut#aot x reader#snk x reader#x reader#reader insert#.fics#.aot#.zeke#.eren#.grisha
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Black Moon Lilith
Talon Abraxas
Lilith, the Triple Goddess of Astrology
Asteroid Lilith
Black Moon Lilith
Dark Moon Lilith
These three Liliths are all connected and are said to open a portal to her energy. They are also said to represent the triple goddess, an understanding into the light, dark, and balance of femininity. The three Lilith’s can also be seen as a cycle of birth, death, and rebirth.
Before we dissect these three Liliths in astrology, let’s talk about the myth of Lilith.
The Death: Black Moon Lilith
Black Moon Lilith is the most commonly used “Lilith” in astrology. This is not a physical object in the sky but instead a mathematical point between the Earth and the Moon. It is actually the point that measures the distance when the Earth is furthest from the Moon during its orbit.
In other words, Black Moon Lilith is like this void, this space between the planet we live on and the Moon that affects our tides and the oceans within us.
There are actually two ways to calculate Black Moon Lilith, but I’ll leave that alone for the time being.
Black Moon Lilith signifies our deeper, darker emotions. If Pluto is Lord of the Underworld, Black Moon Lilith can be seen as Goddess of the Underworld.
If we think of the Phoenix rising from the ashes, Black Moon Lilith is the fire. It’s whatever burns us while we undergo our rebirth and there is something about Black Moon Lilith’s fire that can only be tamed once it has had the freedom to rage.
Black Moon Lilith represents our rage, our triggers, the things that get us heated and motivated to act.
Black Moon Lilith is the part of us that rages with the demons, even though we know it may be considered “wrong” or not socially correct.
We do it not just to be “bad” but because there is something inside of us that wants to challenge the norm, that wants to push the boundaries, that wants to see just how far we can go.
Black Moon Lilith is like the destructible, self-sabotaging, thrill-seeking, midlife crisis in all of us. It’s the stuff that can consume us on the inside unless we stand up and face it. It’s the contents of the fire that burns us so we can rise up again reborn.
The Rebirth: Dark Moon Lilith
It was once recorded that Earth had two Moons. This second Moon was called Dark Moon Lilith or sometimes just the Black Moon. The presence of this second Moon was debunked and chalked up to nothing more than a band of cloud and dust that was mistaken for a Moon.
While it remains a scientific fact that Earth only has one Moon, there are many who feel that this Dark Moon is perhaps Lilith in her final rebirth and she will emerge when the world is ready for her.
Some also believe that Dark Moon Lilith is a Moon from another dimension, and others believe that it is perhaps the remains of a former planet that is now no longer. Either way, the legend of Dark Moon Lilith still lives on.
The Birth: Lilith the Asteroid
Lilith is the name given to the physical Asteroid 1181, which was discovered back in the 1920’s. This asteroid is nestled between Mars and Jupiter.
This is Lilith on the surface. This is Lilith as Adam’s wife before she undergoes her transformation and finds herself as the mother of demons.
She has been considered a strong and suitable candidate for Adam. Can you imagine how many women wanted that role? And how powerful or special he would have been considered?
She is chosen as his wife and she wants to do it well. She wants to be the wife that everyone’s told her to be, but there is a power that is far greater inside of her. A power and independence that is longing to be honored and noted, which is why Adam asking her to be subservient eventually leads her to stand up to him and say a firm no.
And it’s this decision that starts her “death” process where she flees and finds herself in the company of demons. She is deep in the shadow work now and there is no turning back.
The Death: Black Moon Lilith
Black Moon Lilith is the most commonly used “Lilith” in astrology. This is not a physical object in the sky but instead a mathematical point between the Earth and the Moon. It is actually the point that measures the distance when the Earth is furthest from the Moon during its orbit.
In other words, Black Moon Lilith is like this void, this space between the planet we live on and the Moon that affects our tides and the oceans within us.
There are actually two ways to calculate Black Moon Lilith, but I’ll leave that alone for the time being.
Black Moon Lilith signifies our deeper, darker emotions. If Pluto is Lord of the Underworld, Black Moon Lilith can be seen as Goddess of the Underworld.
If we think of the Phoenix rising from the ashes, Black Moon Lilith is the fire. It’s whatever burns us while we undergo our rebirth and there is something about Black Moon Lilith’s fire that can only be tamed once it has had the freedom to rage.
Black Moon Lilith represents our rage, our triggers, the things that get us heated and motivated to act.
Black Moon Lilith is the part of us that rages with the demons, even though we know it may be considered “wrong” or not socially correct.
We do it not just to be “bad” but because there is something inside of us that wants to challenge the norm, that wants to push the boundaries, that wants to see just how far we can go.
Black Moon Lilith is like the destructible, self-sabotaging, thrill-seeking, midlife crisis in all of us. It’s the stuff that can consume us on the inside unless we stand up and face it. It’s the contents of the fire that burns us so we can rise up again reborn.
The Rebirth: Dark Moon Lilith
It was once recorded that Earth had two Moons. This second Moon was called Dark Moon Lilith or sometimes just the Black Moon. The presence of this second Moon was debunked and chalked up to nothing more than a band of cloud and dust that was mistaken for a Moon.
While it remains a scientific fact that Earth only has one Moon, there are many who feel that this Dark Moon is perhaps Lilith in her final rebirth and she will emerge when the world is ready for her.
Some also believe that Dark Moon Lilith is a Moon from another dimension, and others believe that it is perhaps the remains of a former planet that is now no longer. Either way, the legend of Dark Moon Lilith still lives on.
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Pick a card : Intuitive reading
Poems from the divine𑁍 Blessings your way !!
ஓீ፝͜͡❁۪۪🦩ஓீ፝͜͡❁۪۪🦩ஓீ፝͜͡❁۪۪🦩ஓீ፝͜͡❁۪۪🦩ஓீ፝͜͡❁۪۪🦩ஓீ፝͜͡❁۪۪🦩ஓீ፝͜͡❁۪۪🦩ஓீ፝͜͡❁۪۪🦩ஓீ፝͜͡❁۪۪🦩
Disclaimer : This is my third time doing an intuitive tarot reading so don't set anything on stone , if you do not resonate please choose another pile , i would really like it if you tell me whether you resonate .
I receive best messages through poetry and automatic writing , so I would firstly present you with the poem that I received and then decifer a meaning for you , you can also have your own interpretation , the best things about metaphors are that they are metaphors so they are tangible according to you . I'll give a very general what I understand meaning .
🍀 Take a deep breath , meditate and choose the picture you are attracted to :
🔮Pile 1 :
"Up in the palm trees their lies sweet love
Candy crush skies , benevolent heat up
Could you wait honey for some time
Trying won't give it a mind
Give me seconds for i shall show you virtues
Be by a brook
Cry release help
Curated cannons for your hater
Sweet love of mine you are divine"
Interpretation :
Are you anxious about something?Did you sleep well? Palm trees symbolise money , victory , triumph , richness etc . I think climbing signifies you are going through a not so good time right now , you are asked to release whatever you are holding back , as you release you will find more self love , self worth and most probably money . You also might see the world through rose coloured glasses , beware of who you serve your kindness , because most people have only learnt how to take . You also might have new love on the way , the person would be rich and adorable and will bestow you with loads of kindness , or generally it could mean you start loving yourself unconditionally . Are you in anticipation of something , maybe a material or a person , if you are , do not obsess over it too much , because it's meant for you . You will be blessed with wisdom . Try going to a beach or any water entity , it may help you find peace and serenity . You could also try cleansing your mind if you're fogged , use essential oils , subliminals , yoga etc . If you are holding yourself back or have dealt with trauma try healing it . With curated cannons , justice would be served to you , i think recently you had a breakup or some of your friendships ended and maybe whoever is it might be thinking about you too much and they may be disrupting your auric field , you are also told that you are indeed a strong entity in this planet , so never hold yourself back and if you want to manifest something it will be served to you .
Additional : "drop that dumbass " , "break up with your gf , coz I'm bored" , " time heals" , " All you want is yours"
A shuffled song for you :
🔮Pile 2:
Lovely gifts for my favourite courtesan
Your hardwork will pay off
Believe in yourself
For you shall find
What you really need
Creativity bestows upon you like dream rain
Rainbows now for wars are over
Mother oh mother look at your daughter
Painted in all pearl shades
Mary prayed the rosary for your shape
Chariot calmness
Baby bye
Interpretation :
Spirits love you , your energy , your vibe . If you are working on something for a long time and you are suspicious if that will do you any good , yes it will your treats are on the way in the form of promotions , peace money etc . If you are confused about anything you are soon to gain clarity . I think you are very creative and the process is almost very subconscious to you , you maybe blessed in a creative field , you have a creative profession as well . I think you had chaos going on in your life regarding your job or career , you are divinely guided and all of the 7 colours are going to bless you , 7 could be significant to you. Maybe a feminine figure was your support system or she didn't believe in you , she will start to see how amazing things have turned out for you . Everyone is going to be proud of you . You could as well paint , you are attracting good luck and gaining emotional intelligence . Mary may be relevant to you , you are blessed and your angels worked in your favour so you could come this far . If you were working out for a long time , you will receive your desired results . For a long time you had to do everything for yourself but now the action is over so take rest and enjoy . Baby bye could simply mean a disclosure or it could mean you are cutting off people who no longer serve Your purpose .
A shuffled song for you :
🔮Pile 3:
Upheaval your weapons this is a rising
Water in your eyes fire in your soul
Holy blood it's an end now
Truest of yourself you've found
In darkest of times
Middle of the night's pay off
Tree of life from roots to branches
Holds the sweetest nectar within
Search for you shall find
Dream baby dream
You went through spirals to comeback to the start
I send you high to wherever you want
Interpretation :
I think someone was suppressing you or maybe you were suppressing yourself , if you want to do something new it's an indication it's finally time to go for it , i think you are a very passionate person but if they mess with your soul they pay for the consequences. I think you will bounce back , i also hear " I come back stronger than a 90s trend " . I also feel someone is going to win a divorce case or a property case. This is also an indication that you finally know yourself because you dealt and passed the saddest times . I think people in this pile may also be working for their exams day and night , you are going to rock this . This also suggests that you should probably try interpreting your dreams or generally day dreaming will help you manifest anything you want . I get a revolutionary vibe . It's finally time to end the toxic patterns . If you were going back to something that no longer serves you , you are going to drop it for your good ! . You are going to bounce back so hard they will be surprised how good you have become , they also might become envious , but who cares . You do you Queen .
A shuffled song for you :
🔮Pile 4 :
Chains burn when changes come
Roads are open for wherever you wanna go
Cut the crap's
Silver lining in your eyes
Secrets stay secrets this time
Look at you flustered bride red wine
Cheaters will find it hard
To touch your silohette
Work starts for progression
Don't wait start it tonight
You'll never loose
In my eyes .
You are letting go of stagnancy , maybe you felt like you were trapped in your home , but it's time to realise it's you , i see people going to cafes alone truly believing solitude is a bliss , doing things alone finally realising that a person alone is a person powerful . You also might be going places very soon . Whatever others think screw it. You have finally found hope in hopeless times . If you had problems with your relationships and probably wanted to keep it a secret , this will be favouring you. Someone is going to party a lot . Someone is going to be married to the love of their life . Also if someone was cheating it will come to light and you are no longer attracting any toxic people . I think you used to feel weird emotions or feel numb when you were making love , you will feel pleasure from now on . If you are about to start a business , it's a confirmation so go for it . You could actually start anything , the results will be in your favour . If you think you aren't confident or have a feeling that you will lose , it's not that way and it's only for the better . You're going to feel very jovial .
A shuffled song for you :
That's all I had to offer , hope you enjoyed it 💗.
Yes and if you relate to something else and have some other interpretation go with it .
Have a great day/ night 🪄✨.
ஓீ፝͜͡❁۪۪🦩ஓீ፝͜͡❁۪۪🦩ஓீ፝͜͡❁۪۪🦩ஓீ፝͜͡❁۪۪🦩ஓீ፝͜͡❁۪۪🦩ஓீ፝͜͡❁۪۪🦩ஓீ፝͜͡❁۪۪🦩ஓீ፝͜͡❁۪۪🦩ஓீ፝͜͡❁۪۪
#pick a card#pick a card reading#pick a pile#intuitive reading#tarot community#pick an image#pick a deck#Spotify
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About the KyoSaya stuff. I adore character dynamics that bring out each character's ideology by juxtaposition. I adore it even more when the characters rely on each other for balance to be achieved, both thematically in the story and personally for the characters. I think the balance that can be achieved between Kyoko and Sayaka in a "best case scenario" is beautiful, and very good for both of them. Sayaka can reignite Kyoko's passion for believing in good, and force her to care about other people again, getting her out of her entirely self-oriented existence. And Kyoko can help Sayaka take care of herself and learn to be okay with doing things for herself, get her out of her entirely other people oriented existence. Together they could achieve a life of balance, keeping each other in check and being there for each other. A life where it is okay to be naive and want to help others and it is also okay to be selfish and do things for your own sake. Those ideas can exist together, i think.
Sayaka in Rebellion seems to have taken Kyoko's ideas more into account. She doesn't hate herself anymore. I love Kyoko because she is able to exist without exterior validation. She lives for herself, and in that way she never has any regrets. However, Sayaka shows her she can't stay totally indifferent. Ideally, they would be able to live together with Sayaka accepting her own nature without hating herself, and Kyoko accepting her own softer side and not rejecting it.
I don't know if you know anything about the game Madoka Portable (came out way before Magia Record), but there are some "routes" in that game where Kyoko and Sayaka manage to become close without Sayaka witching out. To me, Madoka Portable is some of the best extra content there is for Madoka Magica. There are tons of great character moments and KyoSaya absolutely rules in it. There's a quote Kyoko says in the game (unless i made it up, which is possible lmao). it's roughly her saying to Sayaka "Let's live the rest of our selfish lives together!". and that has got to be one of my favorite quotes from anything (even if i did make it up. i don't think i did?). God, relationships where you just want the characters to give in to each other, and figure out the rest together. I'm sorry this is SO ranty and all over the place.
The core ideal of KyoSaya being the yin and yang of each other is often highlighted, which I also enjoy.
I would like to think that these two are special to each other as a result — previously, Sayaka had never been actively (or in Kyoko's case, aggressively) opposed to before in her ideology of self-sacrifice as heroism, while Kyoko had never met a more persistent believer in goodness since her own experiences with her family and the church. Something akin to an unmovable object versus an unstoppable force, except both of them play both roles.
They enable each other and it's true that people with strong personalities often clash together as a result of their conflicted views. But it's where the angst and essence of KyoSaya comes in: they have to learn to not only compromise their values, but to also embrace each other to be at peace with the more extreme parts of said beliefs. Coexistence, yes. The scene where Oktavia makes her second appearance, there is a brief moment where red (Kyoko) mixes in with a crying figure of Sayaka to comfort her, before the mixture spills onto the ground, signifying both of their ends were made in this fusion and peace making.
Ah, I heard of the game before, since a while back I wanted to see if there was anywhere I could still play it on. I didn't look too in-depth into it, so I'm pleasantly surprised that KyoSaya would be hinted in it too. "Let's be selfish together!" is...so....one of my favourite embodiments of any couple dynamic ever o_o It makes sense since Sayaka was afraid of being seen as selfish for wanting someone to understand her and her frustrations, which Kyoko does. And Kyoko wants Sayaka, out of all people, to be with her because Sayaka made Kyoko learn to genuinely care and trust someone again. With Kyoko's trust, Sayaka could be less harsh on herself as a result!! The description that they have to give into each other and figure the rest together in a confusing and unforgiving world is quite literally the Most Thing ever.
It's devotion, ultimately. They are devoted to each other. Thank you for the ask, and no worries about it being a rant. This blog is for all Sayaka and Sayaka-related pairings enjoyers alike. ^^
#kyosaya#when the doomed yuri has deep lore#i appreciate the effort dedicated to this ship so much#being sayaka and kyoko is suffering and peaceful#whereby peace is achieved only after embracing each other#ueueuueue creature#ASKS 💌
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My Analysis of the Best Paired Endings in 3H (Part 14: Marianne/Lorenz)
Marianne: Back then, I felt that my life served no purpose and that I was nothing more than a burden. In truth, I was begging the goddess to take me to her. That was my daily prayer.
The Crest of the Beast is associated with The Devil arcana. It can signify depression and also be a sign of feeling trapped or restricted, as though outside forces beyond your control are restricting you, leaving you feeling powerless and victimized.
Unless recruited, Marianne was the only student to not appear outside of her home route post-timeskip. Some have speculated that she took her own life, which I suspect is true. It was likely the promise of a class reunion that kept her going those five years. And if Byleth is not part of the class, the house leader will not make the promise. There were only a few people during the academy phase that Marianne connected with strongly enough that they would motivate her to live long enough to see them again at the Millennium Festival.
Marianne: What do you believe determines a person's value?
Sylvain: I like to think it's a person's smile.
Marianne: Huh? Their smile?
Sylvain: A smile, it tells you who someone is. Are they fake or sincere? It also makes you feel stronger when you smile.
While Hilda and Marianne became close friends, that didn't happen until the war arc. During the academy arc, there were only three characters who made a strong connection to Marianne, enough to make her sincerely smile. The first was Byleth. At the Goddess Tower, we can assume she was making a wish to die. But you gain Support points with her if you tell her that your wish is only to see her smile.
Dimitri: Ah, a smile and a laugh. Coming from you, that's a rarity. This must be my lucky day.
Marianne: I just find the idea amusing. It's strange to think that someone like you could have anything in common with me.
Dimitri: Is it so terrible a thought?
Marianne: No, no. It's not that. It actually makes me happy. As though there's finally someone who understands how I truly feel…
Second was Dimitri. Byleth's arc was about awakening her humanity after living as the Ashen Demon, and helping Dimitri become human again, too. While Byleth could understand his capacity for depravity more than anyone, I think Marianne was probably able to understand his survivor's guilt best. If you're playing as Male Byleth, then I think Marianne is by far the best wife for him. Other than Female Byleth, he seemed to have the strongest connection with her because they both felt like cursed beasts.
Marianne: Please, Dimitri. Promise you'll live through this war and long after. I don't know what I'd do with myself if we lost you…
Dimitri: As long as you are carrying on, I have yet another reason to carry on myself. I promise to the goddess of Fódlan that I will never give you cause to despair.
Dimitri longed for female companionship. He can marry his childhood friend Ingrid, his BL classmates, and even his old mentor Catherine. But Marianne was the only other non-Byleth wife to give him a reason to live and vice versa.
Lorenz: But perhaps it is for the best that your beauty not be revealed to all the world. Yes, it is certainly better that only I, Lorenz Hellman Gloucester, can appreciate your true magnificence! And on that note, I bid you farewell!
Marianne: What a strange person… But being called beautiful just the way I am? That was nice to hear.
The final one was Lorenz. I believe the writers probably based this ship on Beauty and the Beast directly. Marianne could even talk to animals like a Disney princess.
If he could learn to love another, and earn her love in return by the time the last petal fell, then the spell would be broken. If not, he would be doomed to remain a beast for all time. As the years passed, he fell into despair, and lost all hope, for who could ever learn to love a beast?
The "Survivor of the Curse" felt totally worthless because of her bloodline. She spent her whole life avoiding other others due to her shame of her Crest. She needed hope that she could love and be loved in return in order to survive.
Catherine: That's not to say lineage counts for nothing. It just doesn't count as much as how you live your life, and what you live for. Or, let's say I was descended from some noble house. Would that change how you treat me?
Lorenz: Yes, it would. To treat you differently from the commonfolk would only be appropriate.
The "Noble of the Red Rose" was pretty much like the Disney prince. Arrogant and judging people on their status and outer appearance. He would invite girls to dinner just to evaluate them. His character arc was about learning that lineage is not the defining factor in someone's worth and that true beauty is found within.
Lorenz: I have always sought to embody the ideal of nobility. That, at least, is a goal I continue to stand by. But now I know that bloodline alone is not sufficient to gauge a person's worth.
The Crest of Gloucester is associated with The Hermit arcana. The Hermit card in Tarot is a card of introspection, soul searching, analysis, and self-reflection. It denotes that this is not a time of socializing or action but of peace and solitude. And a hermit like Marianne was his preferred dining companion.
Marianne: I've been keeping this from you for a while. It's… It's about my Crest. It's just terrible. I—
Lorenz: Please, that's quite enough! You're trembling. If uttering this secret hurts you, then I have no desire to hear it. Your smile is a greater gift to me than any truth. Whatever you have hitherto concealed, I am certain it is essential to you. And I do wish to know it. But not until the day arrives when you can tell me with a smile on your face. I am not the sort of man to prize my own knowledge over others' happiness, you know. Besides. The mystery is part of your charm.
Marianne: Hehehe! You're funny, Lorenz…
Lorenz: There! That's what I mean! Your beauty has always captivated, but that smile truly warms my heart!
It was cute how Lorenz grew to value Marianne's inner beauty the most and accepted her the way she was. He didn't even want to know about her Crest until she could tell him with a smile. It showed how much he'd grown as a person.
Marianne: But now I fear the idea of dying and being left alone. I have friends who accept me for who I am now, in spite of my Crest. And I have you watching over me. I've finally learned to accept the kindness and warmth of others. It's because of you, Professor. Because of you, I've decided to live.
In Houses, Marianne tells Byleth that they are the reason she decided to live because they taught her how to accept the kindness of others.
Marianne: For so much of my life, I didn't care if I lived or died, and yet… And yet when I saw you there beside me, I realized I did care. I wanted to live.
Lorenz: And that is good enough. Such instincts are only natural. You needn't try to justify it to yourself, or anyone else.
In Hopes, Lorenz actually fulfills Byleth's role of being the one who helps Marianne feel like she wants to live. So, this ship definitely felt tailor-made for both of their character arcs and the writers liked it.
Marianne: This is the first time I've smiled in so long…and I have your kindness to thank for that.
Lorenz: As I've said, you are perfect just as you are. But I suppose I can take a little credit! Yes, your radiant smile shall illuminate all the world! With me by your side, you will not be able to help it!
Marianne: Hehehe! I'm looking forward to that.
Marianne was sent to the academy to marry a powerful nobleman, but unlike many of the other girls, that is something that can bring her happiness. She didn't have any big dreams that she'd have to sacrifice to marry a noble and she genuinely liked Lorenz.
Lorenz & Marianne
After becoming the new head of House Gloucester, Lorenz initially focused on the recovery of his own territory before energetically engaging in the governance of all of Fódlan. Having earned recognition as a skilled politician, he suddenly announced his own marriage. His partner was Marianne, the adopted daughter of Count Edmund. Having learned about estate management from her shrewd foster father, she also became involved in the domestic affairs of Fódlan with Lorenz after their marriage. Particularly, she achieved significant success in promoting dairy farming, leading them to be praised as the "parents of cattle and horses." It is said that Lorenz was not pleased with being referred to by that nickname.
Lorenz's dream was for his name to go down in history, and he does achieve a great deal acting in the governance of all Fódlan. In this ending, he has a much different nickname than he probably imagined for himself, but I'm sure it made Marianne smile because her life work benefited the animals that she loved so much.
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Hi! Sorry for my absence, School has been kicking my butt 😭. Do you have any general hcs for the creeps?
-🫧 anon
Oh welcome back 🫧 anon!
School can be a pain in the ass so don’t be afraid to take a break off tumblr if you need to. Be strong, I believe in you!
As for general headcanon for the creeps, I’ll share the ones I remember for now and we’ll see which ones are the most intriguing:
Liu is two years older than Jeff in my AU. Liu did forgive Jeff after he attacked him, he understands that his brother was quite young and was overwhelmed by bloodlust at the time. Jeff and Liu currently have a very peculiar dynamic. Jeff knows that Liu forgives him but can’t bring himself to open up to him ever since all those events that happened 10 years ago. Liu wants to repair his relationship with him but Jeff is too distraught from seeing his brother alive and feels immense guilt.
In general, their relationship is very awkward. Liu tries his best to reassure him and has been incredibly patient but Jeff still can’t fully face his past, especially his past mistakes, fully.
Sully’s distaste for Jeff is quite reasonable, Jeff did try to kill Liu after all. Sully isn’t as bloodthirsty as he’s usually portrayed fanon-wise. Yes he has some moments, he’s very snarky, sarcastic and childish since he is 7 years old. But deep down, he’s just a 7 year old alter than holds some signifying trauma and that’s a role he has had to endure for a while. So his emotional outbursts are quite reasonable, especially in relation to Jeff.
Slenderman really likes chess, it’s probably his favorite hobby. He’s used to playing against his grandfather but nowadays he just likes to randomly invite any of the mansion residents to play against him. Even if they aren’t ready for it.
Also Slenderman’s birth name is Edward and he used to have long hair as a kid.
Trenderman is quite the well known fashion designer in a lot of Midrealm cities, one of his favorite models to work with is actually Jane. She didn’t think much of it when she accepted Trender’s offer but it turned out that she loved modeling and continued to model for him. Jane literally fits for almost all of his designs.
Sally has made pink aprons for all of the male mansion residents, enbies included. The aprons have their names or nicknames hand-stitched on the apron too. They wear it with pride whenever they are in the kitchen whether it be making breakfast or having a cook off.
Lazari is generally really artistic. She loves drawing (obviously), painting, poetry, watercolor, you name it. It’s part of how she copes with her trauma as a creative outlet but also because just loves being spontaneous and expressive because she wasn’t allowed to do that before.
Toby has made it a habit to constantly check his body for any wounds, scratches or generally any injuries he might’ve gotten without noticing. He checks every time before he goes to bed. Toby doesn’t really wear a bandage over his cheek gash, he only does if he isn’t wearing his mouth guard mask for a considerable amount of time. He doesn’t want it infected obviously.
Ben can be quite the prankster and quite the rascal. He’s acts like every 12 year old boy basically. Ben isn’t super powerful or anything, he has all the powers that is expected of his species (he’s in multiple categories, another post for another time).
EJ has a mini-fridge in his room full on kidneys, mostly because he hates going back and forth to the kitchen whenever he wants one. Man definitely has some anger/temper issues, he sometimes gets one of those days where he will yell at someone if they briefly glance at him “the wrong way.”
#creepypasta#creepypasta fandom#creepypasta au#creepypasta headcanon#jeff the killer#creepypasta jeff the killer#homicidal liu#creepypasta homicidal liu#creepypasta liu#creepypasta slenderman#jane everlasting#jane arkensaw#jane the killer#trenderman#creepypasta sally#sally williams#lazari swann#ben drowned#creepypasta ben drowned#creepypasta ticci toby#ticci toby#eyeless jack#creepypasta ej
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Something clicked again. Look at Edelgard's description of herself when the player has to pick a class to teach.
Edelgard: Me? Well...some think I'm a bit distant. Arrogant, even. But there's little to be done. One day, I must rise to become Adrestia's next emperor. What else... Well, it seems to me that we may have similar personalities.
Look at that second sentence, she thinks Byleth has a personality similar to hers. This, sort of foreshadows their A support, where Edelgard says that Byleth is distant. Byleth can disagree, with Edelgard insisting that they are, or Byleth can say the same to Edelgard which she agrees with. She really wants Byleth to be like her, but she says her distance from people is because of the experiments done to her. Byleth's initial distance is because...Jeralt kept them away from people, and we saw how this was changing through teaching at Garreg Mach.
But look at Byleth's profile page. Interests include listening to and helping people while liking swords, reliable allies, being trust and, in the Japanese text, smiles. Does that sound like a distant person to you? Likewise, the Byleth presented in Engage is pretty humble all things considered whereas Edelgard above calls herself arrogant.
We could say that Byleth becomes like Edelgard in Flower, including adopting Edelgard's views on their Nabatean heritage and unquestioningly following the path they've chosen even as everyone calls them out on it, but that would just signify how Byleth ultimately fails. They were supposed to guide their students, instead they were seduced and manipulated into going to the dark side by the Emperor. It would also fit with Edelgard being tied to the Devil arcana, symbolic of corruption, through Amyr being a weapon made specifically for her.
But...arrogance. A large part of Buddhism is supposed to be dethroning the ego. Ego and attachment, the poison symbolized by birds, are said to go hand-in-hand. The concept of ego is that we start things as absolutes, a board with four legs attached is always a table for instance and a table is always a board with four legs. But that just limits our ability to fully grasp the world, there are three legged tables out there as well as six legged ones.
The fact that Edelgard sees her path as the only option is symbolic of her ego and attachment. Even when confronted with information contrary to her views, she's not going to change. According to Hubert, Edelgard is supposed to know that her father was a puppet of Thales and it was Thales who was behind the experiments and the murders of her siblings. Despite this knowledge, a few events later she's telling Byleth the secret knowledge her father passed down to her about why the Church is evil. She says Nemesis was a good guy despite Thales, the guy pulling her father's strings, saying he was a thief.
That history is supposed to be what informed Edelgard's ideals, believing the teachings of the Church were meant to keep people weak, so Edelgard refuses to let it go. When challenged by Dimitri on her ideals, she insists the war was the only way to change things. Her goal is to make people stronger through her reforms, so that they rely on their own strength rather than on others, and no matter how many she sacrifices more people are supposed to benefit from it. Dimitri calls it out as a system for the strong, to which Edelgard says that if it doesn't work it's because of the faults of the people. And it's these ideals that are supposed to lead to her Hegemon Husk form, her becoming stronger in order to defeat Dimitri to rule the world.
It's made out that her ideals don't benefit the people. Hopes makes it very clear that her reforms oppress the commoners while coddling the nobility, so much so that the Western Kingdom lords want to join her while Dimitri is trying to give power to the commoners like his father did before him. Those same lords also worked with Thales and killed Lambert over it, to which Thales says it was for Edelgard's benefit while she says it had nothing to do with her. Her ending in Houses is supposed to be her consolidating power on herself while stripping the nobility of theirs, all in order to make a society where people wouldn't rely on others according to the Japanese text. That is after Edelgard needed to subvert her claims of meritocracy by taking credit for Byleth's leadership, how Hubert needs to put down threats from the shadows, how she needs TWSITD to maintain the peace until she can steal their tech to do the same thing, needed Petra to keep Brigid from supporting the Church, or Ferdinand to figure out ways to make her ideas work. She can give that big speech against Rhea all she wants, but in the end it's opposed to the beliefs she started this war over and she doesn't change what she intends to do. Her Hegemon Husk form is supposed to personify those ideals. The end of the path as a beast unit after Japanese Dimitri called out her path as that of the beast.
Edelgard isn't like Claude, able to accept that her views are wrong and go about things in a different way. If Hopes!Claude is supposed to be how Claude would have been without Byleth, it just serves to contrast the sheer amount of growth he underwent in Verdant Wind.
Or you look at the justification for working with TWSITD in the first place, she needs their support to topple the Church of Seiros. But then we get Hopes, where she breaks things off with them and realizes how much influence they had on the Empire. So what does she do? She continues with her plan to wage war for these ideals.
She says this war is for a meritocratic society, but takes credit for others while rewarding the likes of Caspar (leading to an “often out of control” Imperial army in his Japanese endings) and Bernie (a general who gets scared and tells her men to fend for themselves), while nobles have easier access to positions of power. She says this is about a world for humanity, but is willing to turn herself into a monster to rule it. Not to mention turning people into monsters... I mean, “war assets.” That it's for the good of the commoners regardless of how many she sacrifices or oppresses, and if they don't benefit it's their fault. For all the talk about false history, she's not above creating false narratives to garner support for herself. Not to mention how her version of history was fed to her by Thales' puppet, with Thales himself saying the goal was not to create a powerful emperor to rule Fodlan but to give salvation to the Agarthans.
She says the war is always necessary, but at this point what is she really fighting for other than conquest and centralizing power on herself?
Ego is your sense of self, which can result in being unable to adapt. Arrogance is ego on the next level. Edelgard calling herself arrogant is a warning sign as she's unwilling to alter her path, to call off the war, no matter what changes. You can lead her to the truth and rub her nose into it, she won't learn a thing. That's what her fatal attachment is, the poison that prevents her from achieving her own form of enlightenment.
Which isn't to say that she had no choice, that she was a slave to these ideals. She did have a choice no matter how much she says otherwise. She just chose not to do the right thing because she's convinced that she's right, much like many players who decide to join her. There was always a choice, a means to get out and see things for what they really were, and it was her choice not to take those options. It was her decision to hurt others, to walk a path of hadou (as confirmed by her S support), and that's why she is the villain.
The fact that some players will accuse her creators not understanding her or the story shows their own arrogance.
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Planets retrograde in natal chart🫧🌛
✨Sun & Moon cannot be retrograde✨
🔥Mercury Retrograde- is planet of mind, communications, phones, siblings ,how you express yourself and learn. These people can feel many times misunderstood. You have difficulty communicating clearly with others, with being heard. You can be someone who has a ton of mental energy and is far more intelligent than people realize. But you can't show that to others. You have trouble showing your thoughts to others. People may see you as a person who is not smart. But you are. You have a different mindset than others. It just usually takes a while to let go of the fear, isolation, or insecurity that accompanies this position. You have to work harder to developing confidence in your mental abilities, your ideas. Also these people have learning difficulties. But when Mercury goes into a retrograde state then it is at your home. This means that you feel much better than others. You can create great progress. And that’s when you feel your best. Your mindset and communication show up over time in life. You can be a very good speaker and influencer.
🍓Venus retrograde- planet of love&pleasure. You have some difficulty in giving and receiving love and affection. You may experience sadness in love or have to endure hardship or delay. You can have social anxiety and you have a hard time dealing with people. You may also have low self-esteem and it can also feel like you don’t deserve love. It can also be related to how you experienced love when you were little. Past relationships can mark you. These people have trouble expressing love. They don’t know how to express love the right way. Many times they may think they like someone but they don’t really. You never know if you did something right or not. They may also find it hard to accept love or give it to people. You seek love from others because you do not find it in yourself. Maybe you also need confirmation from others that you are enough. And that can be very difficult because others never give you enough of the love you need. These people also find it hard to admit that they make a mistake in love. You may take the long road when it comes to love, creativity, beauty, pleasure, receiving, peace, and inner harmony. But your love can be special, beautiful and different from others when you develop it.
🥑Mars Retrograde - planet of action & energy. Energy will be expressed in a different way. You may find it difficult to be challenged. This struggle to stand up for yourself may lead to you becoming angry with yourself and focusing on your perceived shortfalls instead of your talents. It’s hard to admit you did something wrong. This can also sometimes signify sexual frustration or an impaired sex drive. You may come on too strong some of the time, and not enough at other times, often thinking of the better thing to say or do only later, when you’re no longer under pressure. You may also not be able to express your energy properly. You may also be doing something and people don’t see what you’re doing well enough. Quarreling with others can be a problem. You try but it is as if your energy and drive for it is not visible and expressed enough. However, your energy is beautifully expressed over time and you can make a lot out of yourself.
💕Jupiter Retrograde - planet of luck& growth. I’ve seen a lot of people who have this planet retrograde and it’s among them also Kurt Cobain. The problem is that you don't find happiness and the things you do don't bring you as much happiness as you could. Happiness can always be temporary. Maybe you have trouble believing in something or faith is a problem for you. You may also lack self-confidence. All the things you’re supposed to achieve - all the fortune and positivity kind of going backwards. it's hard for you to find the real happiness. It seems to you that you are not growing enough or moving forward enough in life. You can feel like you are stuck. Those people value kindness, generosity, compassion, reason, a purpose for existence, and a great awareness of their gifts. But within the first 30 years of the native's life, Jupiter will station direct by progression, marking it a time when the wheel of fortune is turning, demanding a huge leap of faith. From this point on, as the individual regains inner faith.
🪐Saturn Retrograde - planet of maturity & lessons. You can experience it many times self-doubt. You may feel that everything you do is not good enough. Your creativity and work skills can begin to show later in life. It's hard for you to show others what you know. There can also be a strong fear of letting others down or of not filling their responsibilities . Sometimes the childhood was not very disciplined or orderly. It can also mean that you had to grow up early. It is my opinion Saturn shows up much more in the early years than later. Because when you are little, you experience things differently than when you grow up and later in life things get easier. People may also struggle with boundaries, finding it difficult to say no to the demands of others. On the positive side, natal Saturn retrograde individuals are often wise beyond their years, and considerably more in tune with their karmic destiny than others.
🦋Neptune Retrograde- planet of dreams, ocean& illusions. It is considered less impactful than a retrograde personal planet, such as Mercury or Venus. You may be on a lifelong journey to deeply understand spirituality, creativity, compassion, and unconditional love. Neptunian types are normally highlyempathetic and empathic, qualities which can open ripe channels of creative expression. With such a marked sensitivity, however, a prominent Neptune in the natal chart can lead some to escapist behaviors in response to the constant influx of stimuli and energy they experience. After substantial Neptunian setbacks, including but not limited to addictions, delusions, and deception, those with Neptune retrograde may be forced to negotiate their relationship to self-sacrifice and refortify their ego boundaries. Also it may be harder for you to manifest or deal with astrology. Also deal with the subconscious it is more difficult and incomprehensible.
🛼Uranus Retrograde-planet of freedom and rebellion. A planet does not have such an influence if it is not connected to a personal planet. These people often experience unusual changes. Changes are often unexpected. People can have fear of change or a latent mistrust of new technologies or improvements. You may struggle to fully express your inner originality, innovation, liberation, or ingenuity. Your life can change a lot and you can also move a lot in your life.There could be a lifelong struggle with authority but being a rebel without a cause can lead to instability and depression in life.
🫀Pluto Retrograde - planet of transformation& deepness. It’s all an issue of control. A planet does not have such an influence if it is not connected to a personal planet. People can be very secretive and mysterious. Part of Pluto's unenviable remit is to introduce us to the bleaker realities of life, like death and rebirth, destruction and regeneration. Your power is not expressed outwardly. You want to have control over things and show control but you can’t. You may also find it harder to transform and open a new beginning. It may also be harder for you let go of people and situations. You’ll face growth opportunities in the areas of personal power, transformation, and the ability to dive deep beneath the surface. But it is precisely because of this that you can more easily understand the deeper and darker things of life. Maybe you can experience life and death differently than others.
-Rebekah🦋🧚🏼♀️🫧
#astrology#energy#zodiac signs#planets#saturn retrograde#mercury retrograde#venus retrograde#jupiter retrograde#retrograde neptune#retrograde mars#retrograde uranus#retrograde pluto#retrograde planets
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Jujutsu Kaisen, Chapter 209 Thoughts
My thoughts is going to be shorter this week, and mostly veering into fan theory territory, but if you notice Ura-Ume and Kenjaku aer descending down the steps that lead into the Zenin Family curse pit. They even pass the corpse of Ogi Zenin on the way still left there after Maki slaughtered him.
Ura-Ume notes this place is perfect for a bath for lord Sukuna, and rather than focus on what that bath is exactly my question is why the Zenin Family curse pit? The first and most obvious answer is that it seems to be a pit of curses. (Duh). However, the pit mainly used for training and discipline only contains grade 2 or lower cursed spirits, cursed spirits that are too afraid to even be in the presence of someone like Ogi a grade One Sorcerer.
It’s hard to believe the cured spirits concentrated in this pit are even strong enough to be used as fodder for whatever ritual Ura-Ume is trying to attempt to perform for Sukuna. This is where several hints about Kenjaku’s plan dropped this chapter come into play.
The first is when Kenjaku reveals the purpose of introducing non-sorcerers in the game isn’t to heat up the game or make them fight against sorcerers, but rather because of the cursed energy their deaths will produce.
A massive amount of cursed energy generated by cured spirits having a feast on the soldiers, will then be generated for the purpose of Kenjaku’s ritual. This is the bomb that Kenjaku is dropping in the final phase of the culling game, and his key to making sure the ritual is complete. While Kenjaku is explaining this we are shown on panel him feeding Ogi’s corpse to one of his cursed spirits.
This leads into my next conclusion if humans upon their deaths for a brief moment release a large amount of cursed energy, then how much say do sorcerers release? This is an idea that has been explored in canon before after all we are introduced to the concept of vengeful cursed spirits early on, sorcerers who aren’t killed with a sorcery technique who have a chance of coming back as cursed spirits. Naoya’s death produced what was more of less a vengeful cursed spirit more powerful than he ever was in life capable of domain expansion.
If the death of Naoya one sorcerer produces a cursed spirit that strong, then say how much cursed energy does the massacre of an entire clan within the space of what was probably less than an hour produce?
The Zenin Arc is called the “Perfect Preparation” arc, and as of thise moment Ura-Ume is using the Zenin estate to prepare for some kind of “bath”. In japanese this arc is called the “Wild Goose Holding Reeds” arc, which signify birds crossing the river before going to the afterlife. [SOURCE]. Imagery that appears at the beginning of Maki’s massacre of the clan.
If Kenjaku’s plan revolves around using the massacre of human beings to release a large amount of cursed energy, then Maki killing the entire Zenin Clan on the Clan grounds may have helped move Kenjaku’s plans forward, because that many sorcerers dying all have once have perfectly prepared the Zenin CLan grounds into a “bath” to ressurect Sukuna. Whether Kenjaku manipulated things to end up this way, or he’s just capitalizing on Maki’s massacre, it looks like it’s shaping up to be a serious conseqeunce of her actions.
#maki zenin#kenjaku#zenin massacre arc#zenin family#zenin clan#jujutsu kaisen 209#jujutsu kaisen meta#jujutsu kaisen theory#jujutsu kaisen#jjk meta
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