#because she cannot stand mike | Explore Tumblr Posts and Blogs

gojomamashouse · 6 months

Text

I certainly can. And I did. Well, sort of. I took some creative liberties with this one. Crossposted on Ao3.

Warnings: 18+ Content Vaginal sex, Praise kink, Loss of virginity (both reader and Mike), soft!dom Mike.

Pairing: Mike Schmidt x Reader

Summary: From the name written on your sneakers to the hickey on your neck, Mike had left his mark on you in more ways than one.

Words: 5.8k

According to fandom wiki, Mike is 25 in the movie. The timeline of this story is based on this fact.

In Permanent Marker

1995

Mike has a problem. An even bigger problem than his annoying younger sister, or the bills he cannot pay that keep piling up. That problem is you, his new next-door neighbour.

It all began when he had been unloading the boxes from the car, calling out to Abby as she disappeared to explore the new house. The place was small, but enough for the two of them. More importantly, it was as affordable as it could get, given the savings his parents left behind, the money from the government, and his new job. That was all he really needed.

"Need help, there?"

A voice broke him from his thoughts, a voice belonging to you. He did a double take as he looked to his side towards you, nearly dropping the box in shock. He blinks as if you're nothing more than a hallucination, induced by his lack of sleep, dehydration, and the summer heat. Because there was no way that you were standing there. Someone his age. Someone so attractive. Someone exactly his type and talking to him. You take notice of his shocked expression.

"My folks and I saw you from the window," you point to the house left of his, "thought I could lend a hand.”

"Yeah. Yeah, uh," he nods eagerly, breaking eye contact as he fumbles over his words. He looks back towards the house, "If you could watch my little sister while I unload these. She’s somewhere inside…”

“You’ve got it,” you flash him a smile.

—

He’s sweating and close to passing out as he places the last box down in the front hallway, bracing himself against the wall as he catches his breath. He then looks around. There’s no furniture yet. He couldn’t afford movers to help move the couch or the kitchen table from his parent’s old house, instead opting to sell the furniture and find cheaper options once moved in. That meant he’d be eating on the floor until he had time off work again. This also meant he’d have to take Abby table-shopping and listen to her complain every time she picked something out of his price range, then cry the whole drive back home. He groans to himself, annoyed by his endless stream of thoughts. He supposes that’s just adulthood, now. There’s always something to think about.

He hears giggling from down the hallway, grabbing his attention enough to raise himself from the wall. He creeps towards the sound, peeking past Abby's door. A box was open on the floor, toys and crafts scattered across the carpet. You sit cross-legged in the middle of the room at Abby’s side and she’s pointing to her drawings, chattering away.

He wonders how you make it look so easy.

—

"I don't like it here." Abby tugs on the leg of his jeans, "Can we go back?"

It’s the last thing Mike wants to hear the morning after moving in, his back and arms still sore from all that he carried. He looks down to see her lips were pulled into a frown, her brows furrowed. He's leaning against the kitchen counter, drinking instant coffee from a mug he'd managed to dig out from one of the kitchenware boxes, staring at all the shit he has left to do. And, of course, his sister could never let him do that in peace.

"This is where we live now."

"Why?"

"Because it is."

"I don't want to live here."

And I don't want to work shitty hours for shitty pay just to afford this dump, he thinks to himself.

Still, he can't blame her. The place is a downgrade. The toilet in the main bathroom doesn't really flush, her room is half the size of the one at their parent's old place, and he’d discovered more than a few suspicious stains on some of the walls and carpeting around the house.

"Well, that's just too bad."

"I want to go back!" She shouted, her little fingers digging harder into the fabric of his jeans, now trying to tug his leg. He tries to nudge her off, shaking his leg just enough to make her lose her grip, but she doesn't budge. He sighs to himself.

She's at that age. Five years old, and a complete menace. She was smarter than she looked and had begun to realize that sometimes creating a fuss could get him to bend the rules for her, which now meant she was constantly defying him. Constantly picking a fight. Constantly whining about something. And as much as he loved her he could not stand to hear another tantrum, especially not this early in the morning.

"Stop it, Abby. I'm not dealing with this today."

"Nu-uh!"

She screams when he tugs her away with his hands, lifting her in the air while she tries to kick and shove him away. He knows he's bound to have bruises from where she kicks his torso and scratches where her nails dig into his skin. Had he any energy left in him, he might have been tempted to raise his voice at her. That's one good thing to come out of his restless nights, at least.

The doorbell rings and she's still whining when he places her down on the floor. He kneels to her level, hands on either of her little shoulders.

"We can talk about it later, okay?" He lowers his voice, desperate for her to be quiet. Anything for her to be quiet. "Behave. And quit being such a baby."

His words were enough to render her silent, by some miracle, and so he goes to the door, only to see you standing there. You . He knows he's ogling again and he hates himself for it but he can't help himself, not when you're so pretty. He leans against the doorframe, clearing his throat.

"Hey, uh. What are you doing here?"

"Good morning to you, too. Thought you might need more help," You lean forward, taking a peek inside the place and noting all the boxes, "Judging by all this, I guess I thought correctly."

"Guilty as charged," he holds his hands up, cherishing the sound of your laugh.

The moment doesn't last long. He fails to notice that behind him, his sister is teary-eyed, her lower lip quivering. You furrow your brows, about to say something, but the little girl beats you to it.

"You— you jerk!" Abby finally lets out, and you stand dumbfounded at the door, watching the crying girl. She turns to Mike. "I hate you!"

She runs off to some room somewhere and slams the door, the distant sound of sobs easily heard from down the hallway where you two stood. While you stood there in shock, Mike had grown used to these outbursts, but it didn't leave him entirely unfazed. There was still a tug on his heart like there always was.

"She's just having a moment right now," he sighs, his fingers rubbing his temples, "I'm sorry you had to see that."

"You're not going to go and talk to her?"

"She hates me. Didn't you hear?"

"You know that's not true," you shove past him, your hand lingering on his shoulder for a moment longer which certainly did not go unnoticed, "come on."

"What do I even say?"

"You're going to go apologize, dumbass."

That's how he found himself standing outside his sister's door. He was about to simply walk in, until you stopped him, your hand on top of his as he reached for the knob.

"Knock first."

He would've asked why but he's too distracted by how your little touches keep making his face grow hotter, so he simply nods and does as you say, raising his fist to the door. He hears Abby's sobs halt the moment he does. He looks to you, and you nod, as if to signal him to start talking.

"Abs?"

There's a sniffle. "Go away."

"Look, I'm sorry for hurting you. Just open the door." You toss him a glare, "Please?"

There's a pause.

"Liar," she hisses, "you're only sorry 'cause they're making you."

Mike is about to retort, but you raise your hand to silence him.

"Abby, we both want to make sure you're alright. Could you please open the door so we can talk?"

There's a pause and then a shuffle, the sound of her moving from the floor to go and open the door. She's red in the face, snot-nosed and teary-eyed. Mike's heart can't help but break at the sight. He's an idiot. A complete and utter idiot.

"I-I'm not a baby," she blinks at Mike, lifting her arm to wipe her snot on her sleeve, "Y-you're always s-so mean to me. I hate that."

"I didn't mean it. I just, uh... I say stuff sometimes." He frowns, a trembling in his voice. He speaks softly as if it will compensate for all the harsh words spoken prior, "I promise I won't say mean stuff anymore. Honest."

"Pinky promise?"

She raises her pinky finger.

"Yeah. Pinky promise."

He raises his own, letting her little finger curl around his. She quickly wipes her tears away.

The rest of the day is spent doing whatever Abby wants. Mike discovers quickly that you seem to love spoiling her. You take her to the park, let her unpack all her toys and leave them tossed all around the house. You end up ordering pizza at her request, as well, and by the end of the day, she’s saying she wishes you were her older sibling instead. Though it’s said jokingly, it still pierces him through the heart.

The day ends with a tired Abby curled up in her sleeping bag on the floor of her room. Now he's with you, you sitting atop the counter at his side while he places the leftover pizza slices from the takeout boxes into ziplock bags. If he had it his way, the day would have ended with all the moving boxes being unpacked, but he supposes a happy Abby makes his life a hell of a lot easier than an unhappy one.

"She's a lot easier than most her age."

"You're kidding, right?"

"I'm the oldest ' kid ' in this neighbourhood. I've babysat for practically every family around here," you sip your drink, "she was very quick to forgive you. Not just any kid does that."

Garett had been the same way. Every prank he played, every cruel joke, he forgave him for because that’s just what older brothers do. The difference being that he was a child back then, not an adult. He may be Abby’s older brother by blood, but he needed to be more than that now. She needed him to be more than that.

He finishes packaging the last slice and throws the leftovers in the fridge. He's now fidgeting with the sleeve of his hoodie— a poor choice of clothing for the midst of a summer heat wave, but he didn't exactly have lots of options. He supposes he should add clothing shopping to his already long to-do list.

“What am I doing?” He says aloud, “I can’t do this.”

“Don’t say that.”

"This always happens. I get annoyed, she gets hurt, and it’s going to happen again.”

"Nobody's made for this at our age,” you gesture around at the house, then at him, “You're bound to fuck up, that's just inevitable."

"Yeah, thanks,” he deadpans.

"That’s not what I meant. You live and you learn, that's what you do. No one's perfect but we can always try.”

“What if me trying isn’t enough?”

“It’s better than not trying at all.”

He looks back down the hallway, at Abby’s door. Does she care that he's trying? Does she know how much he has sacrificed to give her a semblance of a normal life? He scoffs at himself internally. She's a child, of course she doesn't. That's not her fault. It’s not her responsibility either. She’s the kid, and he’s the adult now. It’s unfair on both sides but that’s the way things are.

"Thank you. For all the help, and everything," He finally says, turning to you.

"That's what neighbours are for, right?" You’re hopping off the counter. It was dark outside now, and fair to assume you’d be on your way home. Only, you halt in your tracks for a moment. "Wait, one more thing."

You pull out one of those disposable cameras from the pharmacy. It’s scratched and beaten up, evidence of its use. He freezes up when he feels your arm draping around him to pull him into the frame and snap a quick picture. He blinks from the flash, and you laugh at the way his eyes squint, shoving the camera back into your pocket.

"The hell?" He raises a brow, "that's going to be an awful one, just so you know."

"I don't care if photos look good. It's about the memories and all that." you roll your eyes, "Anyway, I'll see you tomorrow, bright and early. We're going to finish unpacking.”

You're out the door before he can even reply.

—

He starts to learn who you are, piece by piece. He learns that you don't know a single thing about keeping your curtains drawn shut and that you're completely oblivious to how he's seen you in your room in your pyjamas at night, talking on the phone while you twirl the telephone cord around your finger. He learns that you go to college out of state, which is why you're so insistent on taking photos of everything you can because you get homesick so easily. He learns, that because of that, he won't be seeing you after the summer for many months and struggles to figure out why that thought leaves a dreaded ache in his heart.

The ache only grows the more time he spends with you, whether it’s with Abby or one-on-one. He thinks he’s going to die when he sees you packing up your car at the end of the summer, but offers to help you out regardless.

"Have fun," he says to you, hating how disingenuous the words feel on his tongue.

Your car is now packed, and you're on the steps, him standing on the stone path below. You look up at him with a smile while you're lacing up your shoes. It's those damn shoes you always wear, always torn up and dirty and desperately in need of being replaced. He's not one to talk when it comes to proper footwear, but he swears they are only a thread away from being torn apart.

"I'll try."

You finish doing up your laces, and pull out a permanent marker from your pocket, handing it to him. He gives you a confused look.

"Sign it."

"What?"

"My shoe," you repeat, and he takes notice of your sneakers, varying names written along the white rim already, all in different colours and sizes. "It's something I've been doing since high school. Just to remember."

Knowing how you treasure your photos, it only makes sense to him now. He kneels down and signs it in the black marker, his handwriting atrocious, but evidently an effort to make it appear more legible than normal. He lets go of your ankle when he's done and you smile, raising it to look at his handiwork.

"I tried."

"Hey, it's not that bad."

"It's pretty bad."

You both laugh, and you stand up finally, stepping down to his level. He tries not to show his shock when he feels your arms wrap around him, pulling him tightly towards you. He happily accepts the embrace, soaking up the affection like a dried-out sponge.

"One last thing," you whisper to him, and he feels your hand slip something into his pocket. “Look at it later, ‘kay?”

"I'll miss you."

"I'll be back."

And though he wants to believe you will, he can't help but stare into your dark windows that night, counting down every day until your return. Not everyone in his life has, after all.

He checked his pocket the moment you left earlier that day. It was the photo of the two of you in his kitchen, from one of the first days you met. It was blurry and dark but he could make out the sight of your smile and his face of confusion. The back side has the date written.

He places the photo on his nightstand and rolls over on his back, staring at the Nebraska poster on his ceiling. He took his meds not long ago, his eyes drooping, but his mind unable to stay focused, his thoughts drifting towards you.

—

1996

The last time you called his home line, you said you'd be home in a few weeks, but he still hasn’t seen you yet. The light in your bedroom window remains turned off. He wishes the thought of seeing you again didn’t have him so restless.

Today is his birthday. A whopping twenty-one years old. If he were a normal person, he'd be out with friends, pouring liquor down his throat until he couldn't drink anymore. Instead, he went to work, then returned home late to greet the babysitter on the couch, her middle school textbooks sprawled on the coffee table and Abby already in bed. She’s gone the moment he hands her a twenty-bill, peddling away on her bicycle.

Though the house now has furniture, it still feels so empty. He sits alone on the couch, the sounds from the TV turning into a soft humming. He doesn’t want to think about the dirty plates in the sink or Abby's toys and crayons that littered the living room floor.

His heart skips a beat when he hears a knock on the door. He tentatively gets up, swallowing dryly. It couldn’t be you. You would have called him or said something, right? He’s never been so thankful to be wrong in his life because when he sees you standing there on his steps, in those torn-up sneakers with his name on them, with a six-pack of beer in your hands, he’s immediately grinning like a child.

"Where the hell have you been?" he looks down at the alcohol in your hands, "what's this?"

"A gift for the birthday boy," you grin, "twenty-one. That's a pretty big age."

"Are you twenty-one yet?" He raises a brow.

"You want the beer or not?"

"Alright, alright," he looks into the house, the place dead silent save for the TV. "Let's go out back. Abby has school tomorrow. I don't want to wake her."

Sharing the company of another had become so foreign to him at this point that he forgot how nice it feels to be human. To feel the summer breeze through the fabric of his t-shirt, to feel the condensation from the cold can drip down his fingers, to feel the warmth of the alcohol sitting nicely in his stomach. Hell, he doesn’t even mind how shit the beer you bought tastes, though the initial shock causes him to cough the moment the first gulp is downed.

"Don't tell me you actually waited until now to have your first drink," he hears you say.

"I didn't, but I don't drink that much. Especially not this," he eyes the brand name on the can.

"I was tired of college parties and all the watered-down shit alright? I needed something different."

"Must be exhausting . Getting invited to so many parties."

"Oh, shut it," you shake your head, "trust me, college is lonelier than you think."

He stares down at your sneakers, noticing that not a single new name has been written. One part of him wonders how anyone could not want to become your friend. The other part of him is proud that he’s the last person to sign it, his name standing out compared to all the other old, faded-out ones.

"That's one thing we have in common."

"I take it life's not so great, either?"

"Abby has been acting out less but now she barely talks.” He sighs, “It's... another thing to think about."

There’s a pause.

“Then don’t think about it. Not tonight.”

“Easier said than done,” he rolls his eyes.

"Come on, it’s your birthday and we’re out here moping on your back porch. That's no way to celebrate."

"What do you suggest we do?"

"Something. Anything. I dunno, you're the birthday boy. What do you wanna do?"

"I..." his eyes trail down to your lips and stop. He knows he's being obvious but he's tired enough to where he doesn't really care anymore to hide it. He sees how your brows knit together, and he looks away. "I'm fine doing this."

"That's not what I asked." He feels your hand creep over to his, flat against the porch. Your touch is electric. He allows himself to look at you again. Your eyes are determined and your touch is intentional, he's sure. "I asked what you want ?"

Hesitantly, he lets his hand intertwine with yours. He's barely able to meet your eyes, embarrassed by his cheeks which he knew were most likely pink by now.

"I want you."

His other hand raises to your cheek, his cold hand against warm skin. His eyes speak to you, though his mouth says nothing, asking for permission. You lean in yourself, tired of his hesitation. You can taste the alcohol on his lips, his mouth so tender and sweet against yours. He's gentle and endearingly clumsy but above all else, he's desperate and he kisses you like you'll disappear the moment he lets you go. His hand is tighter around yours and the other that had first been against your cheek drifted to the back of your neck. You hear him let out a sound when your hand runs through the back of his hair and you're both pulling away, still craving something more.

"How much of me do you want?"

"So much," he gulps, "so much more."

There's a grin on your lips as you drag him by the hand, abandoning the half-drank beer cans as you enter the house. Careful not to alert Abby, who was sleeping next to his room, you both tip-toe down the hallway, unable to help the giggles that escape your mouths. Then, the moment you're in his bedroom, you're pushing him against the door, seizing his lips. You feel his abs under his T-shirt, realizing just what he had been hiding under all those hoodies last summer. You feel the warmth radiating from him, drawing you in like a moth to a flame. You smile against his mouth when you feel his hand at your waist, slipping under your top to fit right into the arch of your back. He's holding back, you can tell, and it only makes you want to fan the flames and let him burn even brighter.

You tug him by the collar of his shirt, pulling him towards the mattress until his legs hit the edge and he’s sitting, your body crawling on top of him. And, for someone who had been concerned about not waking his sister, he sure allows himself to make so many pretty noises. He pulls away for air once again and looks up at you like he worships you, his hands on either thigh while you lean your forehead against his own. He then lets out a laugh, still genuine, though hushed.

"What's so funny?" You murmur.

"This is the best birthday gift I've had in years."

"But you haven't even unwrapped me yet," you quirk your brow. "You said you wanted more, didn't you?"

"I did," he hums, his eyes dragging down over your body, shyly. "Still do. If that's what you want, too."

"You already know I do."

He brings his fingers to the hem of your shirt and slowly lifts it, your arms raising to help him slip it off. You feel yourself shudder under his analytical gaze, even though the night is sweltering. You feel the goosebumps rise under your skin as his fingers brush over your body as if to memorize every curve and texture with his fingertips. And though you had done your best to mask your inexperience all night, it became obvious to him, the moment you were squirming before him— topless— the truth.

"I've never done this before," you admit before he can ask you, feeling more vulnerable than ever as he stares up at you, the most anyone had ever seen of you beneath your clothing.

"That's okay," he tilts his head, big brown eyes looking right back at yours, "if it's okay with—"

"I've already told you it is. Everything is okay with me. Please. "

He nods, his hands reaching behind you, and you feel his fingers at the clasp of your bra. There's a flush on his face as he fumbles with it, brows scrunched as he tries to pull it apart. Then, it hits you. The look in his eyes, the uncertainty in his actions, the constant need for reassurance. He's been trying to hide it just like you were. Had your own mind not been so clouded, perhaps you would have noticed it far sooner. You reach behind yourself, hand brushing past his own to unclasp the bra yourself, before letting it slide down your shoulders. There's a glimmer in his eyes as he takes in your half-naked form, mouth parted slightly.

"You've never done this either, have you?" You ask, hands looped around the back of his neck as you seat yourself better in his lap. You try not to make a sound when you feel his erection through his gym shorts, pressed right up against where you need friction the most.

"Never," he manages to say, somehow. "I don't know what I'm doing."

"We'll figure it out."

You're kissing him again, and this time you're the one fumbling to remove his shirt, unable to properly admire his exposed body as his mouth is pressed against yours the moment the garment is removed. You feel yourself start to crumble at every little noise he makes, every little touch and grinding of his hips into yours. Then his mouth is trailing down your neck and his hands are on your breasts, his touch gentle but his lips hungry. You feel his lips suck on a particular spot on your collarbone and hiss, your fingers threading through his hair.

"You're gonna leave a mark.”

He pulls away, not quite sporting a grin, but the look in his eyes tells you he’s proud, regardless.

"Is that a problem?"

"Bastard," you retort.

With that, you're pushing him down until his back is against the mattress, leaving your own trail of kisses down his neck and chest, a flurry of butterflies in your stomach every time you hear his noises, and whispers of praise. You reach down for his shorts, tugging them down, this time you're able to get a better view of him beneath you. Your hand traces the outline of the muscles on his abdomen and chest, feeling your face heat up, again reminded just how built he was. As if he couldn't get any hotter, you notice the trail of hair leading from his belly button, disappearing beneath his boxers. You suck in a breath, your pupils blown wide.

“I'm gonna go insane if you don't touch me right now,” he says, allowing you to realize just how long you had been staring him down.

The words go straight through you, reminding you of your arousal between your legs, and how you were currently sitting right on top of his dick, the only barrier between you being each other's underwear. You rock your hips against him and hear him whine, your hands flat against his chest. It almost scares you how good it already feels, without having done much of anything at all.

"You have any condoms?" You ask.

"Yeah, think so," he stammers, his eyes darting towards his dresser.

You get up, feeling his eyes on your ass as you dig through the drawer, sifting through clutter. Momentarily, you smile when you find the photo you gave him last year— before returning to the task at hand. You find a condom buried at the very back.

"Were you prepared for this?" You tease.

"I don't think that far ahead. They’re free handouts from sex Ed, senior year."

"If you actually paid attention in that class, you'd know that condoms have an expiration date."

"I did pay attention," he says as you settle yourself back on top of him, the foil between your fingers. "They're not expired yet ."

"Yeah? What else did you learn?"

You suppress a yelp when you feel your position forcibly switched, your back now against the mattress with him hovering over you. The condom had disappeared into his hand.

"That you probably shouldn't be on top for your first," you feel his hand at your panties, brushing your clit over the fabric, "and that you're gonna need more foreplay than just dry humping."

You notice how he looks at you for approval before tossing your underwear aside, admiring how your slick coats his fingers. You'd touched yourself enough times before to know what this feels like but somehow, when it's him doing it instead of yourself, you already feel you'll fall apart at any moment. Your clit is swollen and your hole flutters around nothing as his fingers continue to tease you. Fortunately, he slips his middle finger in before you can scold him for being a tease— and fuck it's so much more than you're used to. His fingers reach inside you better than yours ever did you feel your mouth go agape, your hand reaching to clasp over your mouth out of fear your noises will echo through the mostly silent house.

"Mike," you plea, but to no avail, one hand still desperate to muffle your sounds while the other gripped the bedsheets.

“Is it… am I doing it right?”

“Yeah,” you nod, “please, don’t stop.”

You’d heard horror stories before from others, about how aggressive some men were with their first times. But you think Mike is the opposite. So gentle and considerate— uncertain and awkward, sure, but with a willingness to learn and try.

“Doing so well,” he whispers sweetly, “you’re so perfect.”

You're so close to reaching your high that you almost wish you could strangle him the moment he pulls away, leaning down to capture your lips into a kiss. You then hear the sound of the foil being torn apart and the feeling of his dick rubbing against your centre. Despite his smile, you notice the worry behind his eyes. He's terrified. So, you bring your hand to his cheek.

"I want this," you reassure once again.

He nods.

He slips the tip in and your body spasms, the intrusion feeling so foreign. He watches your expression change with each passing moment he spends pushing into you. He loves the way your lips part, how your lashes flutter shut. Loves how your brows scrunch together. All because of him. You’re so soft and warm around him and he’s struggling to cool himself down.

"So much," you comment, your eyes half-lidded when he finally bottoms you out, your bottom lip pulled by your teeth. He tries not to let the compliment get to him, otherwise, he knows he’ll be finishing faster than he wants.

"You're doing so good," he whispers, his hand intertwining with your own, "taking me so well. Can you keep doing that?"

You nod, and he whimpers, taking another thrust. Your nails are digging into his shoulder blades but he doesn't care. It’s another distraction, helping him hold himself together while you take him. He takes another thrust and nearly loses it when he watches you whine, tilting your face to the side.

“More,” you let out.

You feel every inch of him inside you, pressing against your most sensitive parts and though the initial discomfort hadn’t fully yet faded, you start to feel yourself getting lost in pleasure the more you accommodate him. You continue to drag your nails down his back, the knot inside of you growing tighter. You reach down to touch your clit, aching for more stimulation, but he’s quickly replacing your hand with his own, rubbing circles into you.

“So good.”

“Yeah?” He stammers out, finding it difficult to string words together in the moment.

“You feel so good, Mike.”

He didn’t realize how fucking hot it would be to hear you say his name while you’re fucked out like this until you do, and he feels himself losing a grasp on himself.

The feeling inside of you starts to snap and your body is thrashing around as you approach your high. He feels you grasping onto him like he’s your lifeline, shaking through your cries, which are muffled by your hand on your mouth. He, too, reaches his limit, and he’s burying his face into the crook of your neck in the hopes that he isn’t too loud.

All that’s left is the sound of both of you breathing when it’s over, and you hear him get up, throwing the rubber away. The bed dips at your side and you feel him on top of you again, head buried into your neck as he holds you. You can’t help the smile that forms on your lips, your fingers raking through his brown curls.

It's different from all the times you've touched yourself beneath your sheets in the dead of night. Instead of coming down from your high and laying your head against a cold pillow, your head is against him. You can feel every beating of his heart, every rise and fall of his chest as he breathes. You can feel the stubble on his chin and jaw tickling the crook of your neck. You're shaking, sweating and your whole body aches, yet you want nothing more than to lay here with him. And though you could have given yourself to some other person in college, you know it would not have been the same with anyone else other than the messy-haired brunette who lay atop you.

"Missed you so much," he whispers, "please stay?"

You stare at your house through his window, choosing not to think too hard about the view he has into your bedroom from this angle. Your family wouldn’t care.

"I'm here," you respond, pressing a kiss to his head.

#mike schmidt x reader #mike schmidt smut #mike schmidt x you #fnaf x reader

387 notes · View notes

flanaganfilm · 1 year

Note

hi mike, saw someone say your ask box was open and i came running! have you ever had any ideas as to how the crain family would be getting on now a few years later/what they're doing? it's always in the back of my mind wondering if creators also wonder about those sort of things themselves once their project has ended. thanks so much & hope you have a great day!

I do think about that. Quite a lot, actually.

The Crains took on lives of their own for me. I'd never written long form before, so it was the first time I lived with the same characters for that long, and for such extended arcs. Here's where I think they are, a few years later:

Shirley: I think that Shirley and her husband overcame her disclosure of infidelity. She'd been closed off for so long, after the series ended I think she found some peace in her life and opened herself up to her marriage. I think she also began to find kindness again. They ran the funeral home together, but Shirley found purpose in helping people handle grief and loss with empathy and kindness. Her oldest would be just about ready to start college now, and I think that would have her looking back and realizing that she always remembered her childhood as seemingly endless... but now she sees just how fast it truly goes by.

Luke: Luke stayed sober. He's six years into it now, and it's gone so well that he's also become a sponsor. That doesn't mean he's immune to the struggle, far from it. He still walks up to that edge sometimes. Oddly, it's in those moments that the "Twin Thing" kicks in... and he feels an inexplicable and complete sense of love. He knows that's Nell's, and that always pulls him back from the brink. He never did find Joey, or find out what happened to her. And sometimes he still wakes up with nightmares that he's on the floor of the Red Room, or that Joey visits him with her runny-egg eyes. But no matter how hard it gets, he feels what Nell feels for him... and that always pulls him through.

Theo: Theo and Trish got married, and moved far away from New England. They currently live in Portland. She still works with children, but enjoys a much smaller patient pool. She specializes in the kids who are hardest to reach, and she's sought after for her unique and uncanny ability to connect with them. She doesn't wear gloves anymore, but she still avoids the very crowded places. She and Trish take long hikes, grow their own pot, and travel frequently and spontaneously. They're considering a surrogate... and if it's a girl, they're going to name her Eleanor.

Steven: Steve and Leigh have two kids, and are thinking they might stop there. He never wrote about what happened at Hill House, but he still writes. Science fiction. Leigh recommended the genre as a way for him to focus on the future, not the past. He likes it a lot. It's pulpy, but it's earnest. He maintains Hill House, as it is his responsibility, but he doesn't enter the property beyond the gates. He has a rotating collection of people service the property itself, always during the day, and only for a few hours at a time.

Hill House stands quietly and silently in the hills. There is something different about it. Still the same energy, but without the malice. Steve assumes this is because of Hugh, Nellie and Olivia, who maybe curb the most malicious energies of the house from within. While shadows still walk in the windows at night, there are no living souls there to see them. Mostly, Steven imagines the spirits inside spend most of their days sleeping. And if they cannot sleep, he imagines Mrs. Dudley singing softly to them on the wind.

There is grief, for all of them. There are nightmares. Horrible dreams of moldy rooms and phantom hands. They meet twice a year, usually without spouses, to catch up and raise a glass to Nell, and their parents. There is a lot of healing still to do, a lot of therapy, a lot of introspection. But there is peace, too. There is love. There is forgiveness.

#the haunting of hill house #does this count as fanfic?#epilogue

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thestrangestthing89 · 1 year

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This is going to be ranty and I've touched on this subject before. So if you're a Steve worshipper look away. For the record, I love his character but I cannot stand the constant mischaracterization of him. It turns him into a joke. He's not a mom and the comparison is frankly sexist not to mention shows how much people are willing to overlook with regard to his character. Joyce does triple the amount of work and is an actual mom, so if you want to praise someone for being a mom look to the real one. Instead she gets practically ignored by the fandom. Steve does the bare minimum compared to a lot of people and gets worshipped, and the result of this is that people end up turning him into a 1 dimensional version of himself. He has flaws and it's important to acknowledge them. He's far more interesting and relatable this way. Without doing that he gets turned into a god-like figure who is infallible. But the worst of this is the constant erasure of Jonathan. I keep seeing posts saying that Steve would be such an amazing mentor to Will and how wonderful their relationship will be next season. Be for fucking real. They don't have a relationship and never will and Will doesn't need him. Not to mention the fact that Steve isn't a mentor. He is a peer. And only to Dustin, Lucas, Max, and Erica who are the only kids who are shown to have any kind of relationship with him. And honestly Dustin is the only one that isn't superficial. It's especially notable in the case of Mike that they never developed a relationship. It shows that not only are Mike and Nancy not that close, but her ex-boyfriend never bonded with him. Mike tends to respond to Steve with the same contempt he has for his father in the brief moments we've seen between the two.

It's Jonathan who is an ally to Will. It's Jonathan Will and Mike trust. It's Jonathan Mike has known since he was 5. And it's Jonathan who has constantly protected them. Neither one of them have a relationship with Steve. All of these characters have been on the show since the beginning. If Steve had a major impact on any of their lives they would have shown it by now. And yes, Steve is no longer the bullying asshole he once was. He has gone through a great character arch that has shown him growing and changing in a realistic way. However, he still has a lot to learn and this was demonstrated through his shitty advice to Robin early in the season. Him dismissing her fears of asking Vickie out was not ok and shows he doesn't fully understand her point of view. Just because he ended up being right at the end doesn't excuse the fact that he told her to just ask Vickie out simply because she paused a movie at a certain time. He could have very easily been wrong and it was valid that she was hesitant.

Steve used to bully people for being gay, and again, it's good that he doesn't do this anymore and has grown. But this is the version of Steve that Will, Mike, and Jonathan know. They know the version of him that called Jonathan the f word and said his brother deserved to die. They know the version of him that said their abusive father was right. Mike and Will are not coming out to Steve.

In fact, people should expect them to be afraid of him and expect Jonathan to immediately be on guard and protective. Because this is the only version of him they know. Steve was known around town for being a bully and he still has this reputation - Eddie says this season he is surprised Steve wasn't an asshole even though Dustin insisted.

Mike and Will are two scared kids who live in a town that behaves the way Steve used to. They expect this kind of reaction. It's Jonathan's calm, empathetic support they need. It isn't the guy who used to be homophobic - and honestly has no patience for the kids - to help them out. Quiet, sensitive Will does not need someone loud and impatient who used to act like his abusive father in his life. And it's not on Mike and Will to absolve Steve of his past crimes.

And I absolutely cannot stand all the headcanons that I see of how Steve is going to start a LGBTQ support group around Hawkins for Robin and Will. It's utterly ridiculous. We absolutely do need Robin bonding with Will (and Mike and Vickie) but there is honestly no excuse for the constant insertion of Steve into this narrative. It is not a place he belongs. As an ally, it's important for him to recognize there are spaces that aren't for him. They do not need his permission or approval to talk to each other.

And bonding with Robin does not automatically come with a close bond with Steve. It isn't required. She is her own separate person who has her own separate experiences that Steve does not always need to be apart of just because they are friends. It's far more impactful to see a moment between Will and Robin (including with Mike and Vickie) without Steve randomly being there saying pointless shit. And they aren't wasting a moving coming out moment with Steve and Mike and Will instead of with people they are actually close to. Inserting him into this narrative changes the focus from the LGBTQ character to Steve. It makes it entirely about him and his response instead of them. In fact it's not outside of the realm of possibility that he just never finds out or it's a very quick moment that happens in passing. But erasing his characters actual role on the show completely misses the point of why he's still in this narrative. The cool guy isn't the focus of this story for once. It's not his story. That doesn't mean he isn't important. It means that for once the straight, white dude who's conventionally attractive is taking a backseat and not only that, but he's not resentful about this. He doesn't act bitter that he isn't the focus. And this is such an important role to see.

#byler #mike wheeler #gay mike wheeler #will byers #jonathan byers #steve harrington #anti mileven #anti stancy

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unfinishedslurs · 1 year

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prank gone wrong (viral!) (steddie)

Eddie’s been someone’s dirty little secret before.

He’s got a type, okay? Unfortunately hot jocks are often the type of asshole to get sucked off behind the bleacher and then turn around and spit in his face about it. Going right back to their friends to talk shit about what a freak Eddie is, never mind the fact that his mouth still tastes like their nasty fucking jizz. He’s used to it by now. Used to people who pretend they barely know each other. He’s not asking they parade their relationship for the whole town to see, just someone who doesn’t pretend they’re strangers. Is that too much to ask?

He’s so fucking stupid. He really thought this time would be different.

Steve Harrington barreled into his life like a goddamn train and Eddie’s been derailed ever since.

The first time he met Steve he was six. Eddie still lived with his mom, and she took him to the park, where he met a little boy who wrinkled his nose and told him he smelled bad. Steve does not remember this, and turned red with mortification the first time Eddie told him

After that incredible hit to baby Eddie’s self-esteem, they didn’t interact much, existing on the periphery of each others lives. He figured it didn’t matter. Harrington was a year under him, and a douche besides. Was ready to leave town from the moment he learned to walk. As soon as he graduated, he could finally get the hell out of this place and never think about the assholes he went to school with again.

His mom leaves. His dad gets arrested. He moves in with his Uncle Wayne, who only has one bedroom in his trailer and won’t take no for an answer when he gives it to Eddie.

Eddie doesn’t graduate.

(Harrington comes back to school different after Byers beats him up. Eddie doesn’t notice. He’s got bigger things to worry about.)

They don’t talk in Eddie’s second run of senior year either. He hears the gossip, sees him come to school with stitches in his forehead and no girlfriend. Still, it’s none of his damn business. He rolls his eyes at the rumors and stays far away from Billy Hargrove.

Steve Harrington graduates. Eddie doesn’t.

And this is where his careful distance falls apart.

It’s the mall’s fault of course. What isn’t? Businesses closing down, rent going up, his resolve crumbling. All over some fucking ice cream. God, Eddie should have just turned around. Left the store and the mall and the entire damn town behind.

He’s aware he’s being melodramatic, but in his defense he’s queer in Indiana. He has a right to be.

Anyways, the point is that Eddie saw Harrington’s little blue shorts and red lips and cannot be held responsible for what happened after.

(They fucked. That’s what happened. They fucked, and kept fucking, and then after the mall burned down Steve showed up on his doorstep with suspiciously placed bruises and his coworker and looked at Eddie with pleading eyes. He didn’t even bring Robin home to her parents like a sensible person, just insisted on having her there because they were a package deal now and couldn’t be separated. Like puppies, Robin said when he looked at her. Last he checked, she wanted to bite Steve’s head off, and now they were attached at the hip?

He got used to it quickly. He had to. She comes on half their dates. Steve’s lucky he’s so cute.)

Now, nearly five months after Steve served him ice cream for the first time, he feels his heart shatter in the Hawkins High parking lot.

“Harrington,” Dustin shouts, and it carries across the empty lot. Steve’s head jerks up and he waves, Robin standing beside him. “Steve, c’mere!”

Steve tilts his head. “What?”

“Come. Here.” Dustin repeats, enunciating clearly. Mike and Lucas look at him like he’s insane. So do Gareth, Jeff, and Chuck.

Steve, who is standing a mere 20 feet away, turns to Robin and says something that makes her snort. Eddie can practically hear his bitchy murmur.

“Is that Harrington’s girlfriend?” He hears Gareth ask. He has to swallow his laughter.

“Yes,” Dustin says.

“No,” Mike corrects.

“He won’t admit anything, but he always has a bunch of hickies and stuff after hanging out with her,” Lucas clarifies, because half the time when Steve says he’s hanging out with Robin he's actually with Eddie. The fact that Robin is usually still there is irrelevant. Marking up his boyfriend is one of his favorite pastimes. He refuses to let his boyfriend’s “soulmate” get in the way just because she refuses to sleep in one of the Harrington’s fancy guest rooms like a normal person unless he kicks her out. The way they both pout at him for it is fucking ridiculous. He ends up giving in half the time, and then lies awake and cold on the very edge of the bed because Robin starfishes her way across the rest and Steve is a blanket hog.

The first time he tried giving Steve a hickey as some kind of dominance move for privacy, Robin stared him dead in the eye and didn’t back down.

“I can do that too,” she said, and promptly bit Steve on the shoulder. Steve, who was shirtless and already slightly dazed from Eddie’s ministrations, let out an honest to God squeak. Like a dog toy. Eddie and Robin both stared at him before breaking into loud cackles that had a blushing Steve yelling at them before finally burrowing under the covers and refusing to come out. Needless to say, Eddie didn’t get laid that night.

“Harring-ton,” Dustin whines.

“I’m literally right here. You come here.”

He did, if only to grab Steve by the wrist and drag him to where everyone else was standing. Steve squawks. “When we’re late for dinner with Ma, I’m telling her it was your fault—“

“I want you to meet everyone!”

“I went to school with them!”

“Yeah, but they think you’re still a dick,” he says, as if they’re not standing right there. Steve is similarly engrossed in their conversation, not even noticing that Dustin’s stopped walking.

“They can think whatever—“ he walks right into Eddie and lets out a startled oof. Eddie, who let it happen, catches him as he flails.

“Well hello to you too,” he says, not bothering to hide his amusement.

Steve looks at him with wide eyes, gaze dropping down to his lips before whirling around and snapping, “Henderson!”

“I didn’t do anything!”

“I didn’t do anything,” Lucas mimics under his breath, ducking behind Steve when Dustin turns around with the fury of a thousand suns in his eyes.

He just stands there, hands on his hips as the kids bicker around him.

“Oh, so now we can talk?”

“What’s that supposed to mean?” Steve asks, brow furrowed like he doesn’t know exactly what he’s talking about.

Eddie can’t help but laugh, a sharp sound that makes Steve jump. “What do you think it means, Harrington? You never want to talk to me in front of the kids! Don’t want to dirty your hands with the Freak in public, I guess.”

“I…what are you talking about?”

[no talkie henderosn]

“What?” His eyes get wide, panicked, as he reaches for Eddie. “Eddie, that’s not—you have to know that’s not what I meant by that. I never meant it like that!”

“Then how did you mean it?”

Steve mumbles something he can’t make out.

“Speak up, sweetheart.” It comes out mean, he knows it does, but he’s feeling a little mean right now. Lashing out like a wounded animal just because his boyfriend didn’t want to talk to him in public.

Actually, when he puts it that way, he remembers he’s justified.

Steve says something again, still incomprehensible. Eddie rolls his eyes. “If you can’t stop mumbling, I’ll just leave.”

That does the trick. “I thought we were playing a prank on Henderson together!”

Eddie gapes at him. “What?”

“I thought,” he repeats, running an anxious hand through his hair, “we were pretending not to know each other to mess with the kid. Eddie, baby, you’ve gotta know I wouldn’t have done it if I’d known you were hurting. Why didn’t you tell me?”

“Why didn’t I…” This can’t be real. He’s been agonizing for months, and for what? A prank? Just some stupid, shitty prank Steve thought he was in on? He’s going to jump off the quarry. “Why didn’t you tell me? I could have had so much fun with that!”

“I thought you knew!”

“How would I have known? I can’t read your mind!”

“You can sometimes,” he says, pouting. Eddie wishes they weren’t in the middle of an argument, he wants to kiss those lips so bad.

He groans into his hands. “It’s significantly easier to tell when your boyfriend wants to fuck than it is to read ‘Hey, let’s play a prank on this twelve year old,’ on someone’s face, sweetheart.”

“I guess,” Steve huffs. Then his face softens. Eddie lets himself be drawn in by the wrist, helpless in the face of his sweet smile. “We can stop,” he promises, swaying in close enough for his breath to ghost across Eddie’s lips. “We could walk into Hellfire tomorrow holding hands, if you wanted to. Anything you want, just say the word.”

“How would we walk into Hellfire? It’s at your house.”

Steve pinches him for that.

#prank gone wrong (viral!) au #steve harrington #eddie munson #stranger things fanfic #steddie #i Did not end up writing the actual scene where Steve decides to prank Dustin by pretending to hate eddie #But just so you know he looks at Eddie and raises his eyebrows and in Eddie’s mind he’s asking how they should play this #in Steve’s mind he’s asking a series of convoluted questions that end ideally end with Dustin ripping his hair out in frustration #Steve I’m sorry but you need to use your WORDS your boyfriend things you HATE HIM #this goes from pre-s4 to post-s4 btw #Featuring stobin being weird as fuck friends bc I feel like they would Not Be Separated for the first couple of months after Starcourt #Eddie just has to deal with that #He’s also being dramatic they eased up eventually. enough for Robin to give them space to get their rocks off anyway

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w1ldthoughts · 3 months

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Social Media QB

Anon Requested

Disclaimer: this is a work of FICTION, the characters are fictionalized versions of real life situations and real people. It’s all based on my imagination.

Masterlist

The reputation of the Chargers social media team was unmatched. They are known for being funny and up to date on all memes and pop culture references while also showcasing players’ personalities. That alone made you apply and this past year on the job had really been a once in a lifetime experience. Working with Megan and the crew was a daily adventure and you were becoming more and more comfortable calling the guys your friends. It even got to a point where you didn’t even call them by their names anymore.

Keenan was usually “slay” or “slayer.” Mike was always “Mike Dub”, Michael Davis was “Vato” and your favorite nickname was definitely calling Justin “Sunshine.” At first it was a Remember the Titans reference but it became a lifestyle. Everything and everyone revolves around the sun and that’s exactly what it felt like when you were at work. All of the players were important and special but you could just feel the energy in the room shift when Justin was there. It was palpable, it almost took your breath away sometimes.

Off camera he was goofy, funny and had this uncanny ability to make the world stand still for a bit, even just for a few fleeting moments where it felt like you two were the only ones in the room. But then reality would hit and you were reminded that you work for the team and he’d never see you in that way, he was just nice to everyone he encountered. But on camera? It was all fun and games. There was a running joke, mostly based on his real feelings, that Justin hated cameras. He couldn’t stand being the center of attention or having people perceive him so he avoided the social media team altogether when phones were pointed in his direction.

But sometimes, a rarity, you were able to get him on camera, even if it was just for a split second. The two of you reviewed the questions he was going to be asked before their Hot Ones appearance and there was ALWAYS a discussion, more like subtle begging if you all were going to have him participate in any content.

“We need Justin for this new segment we’re doing, so you’re gonna have to talk to him.” Megan sighs, grabbing her Stanley cup that was sitting on the counter. She’d just finished editing a video where she and her assistant put fart spray on the tiny mic and could still feel the rancid scent on her clothes.

You were going through photos taken during practice earlier that morning and deciding which ones to post. “Why do I have to do it?”

Lorren and Allie giggle in the corner, shaking their heads. “You cannot be serious right now y/n,” Lorren gives you a pointed look.

“What?”

“We all know you and Justin have a thing for each other. Even if you won’t admit to us…or yourself. It’s pretty obvious.”

You raised your head up from your laptop, staring at them while also wracking your brain trying to figure out when your innocent crush had become so painfully obvious. If the girls knew, then Justin had probably somehow caught on and the thought of that made you want to dig a hole right outside on the practice field and never come out. “Is—am I that easy to read?”

“No one blames you,” Megan runs a loving hand on your shoulder. “And I’m sure you’ve been trying so hard to hide your feelings that you haven’t noticed that he’s doing an even worse job of hiding his massive crush on you.”

The look on your face sends the room into a fit of laughter. “We’re being serious. The way he looks at you and acts around you. Anyone can see he’s into you friend.”

You weren’t convinced, “I need an example.”

“Okay fine,” Lorren stands up to prepare a demonstration. “He wasn’t ready to put the mics on when he was mic’d up until you walked over and helped him get the mic in the perfect spot in his pads. And then he wore the friendship bracelet for six weeks because you handed it to him.”

Allie pipes up to put in her two cents. “And let’s not forget when he had you driving him around the golf tournament and kicked Zion to the curb. There’s no way all of those are just a coincidence.”

“Fine. I’ll go ask him if he’ll shoot the video for us but I’m not going to lose my job because of a meaningless crush on the starting quarterback.”

You waited around for the guys to leave treatment after practice and caught up with him on his way out. “Hey Sunshine, quick question for you.”

His cheeks turn a light shade of pink and he gives you a small tight-lipped smile. “What’s up?”

“I need you to do me a huge favor and be in this tik tok. It’s a short game and it’ll only take like 15 minutes.”

His deadpan face and disappointed dad sigh has you practically begging, saying “please” in your finest sing-song tone.

“Fine, I’ll do it.” You knew he’d crack, he always did. “On one condition. You also have to participate.”

You hold your hand out and he engulfs it with his much larger one. “You’ve got yourself a deal Herbert.”

“Okay the rules of the game are simple,” Megan begins from behind her phone screen before hitting record, “we’re going to give you these Canadian snacks and you’ll rate them on a scale from 1 to 10. One being it’s awful I’ll never touch that again and 10 being a solid snack that you’d eat everyday if given the opportunity.”

You and Justin nod, diving in on everything from the ketchup chips to the toffee. The video didn’t take long as promised and the quarterback went about the rest of his day with no further distractions.

In your office a few days later on the team’s off day, you were contemplating your life. Maybe you should take a step back from him so people didn’t get the wrong idea. Sure, your coworkers were convinced the crush was mutual but what if he was just being nice? He was always so focused on football and making the most out of every opportunity why in the world would he waste time flirting with a social media manager? It just made no sense. Instead of continuing to run a million imaginary scenarios in your mind you packed up your stuff and tried heading out to the parking lot. Even after all this time you still struggled to maneuver all the twists and turns of the building and somehow found yourself walking past the quarterback room. You intended to just keep walking but he was in there alone and called out your name when he saw you.

“What are you doing here? I didn’t think anyone would be in the building today.” His bright eyes staring down at you made your heart feel like it was beating out of your chest. You desperately needed to get it together.

“I came in to finish up a few things but I’m heading out now. What are you doing? I think you’ve watched enough film to last you a couple lifetimes.” That gets a light chuckle out of him and he shakes his head, the two of you knowing that his quest for perfection would never allow him to believe he’s watched enough film. “Thank you for shooting that video the other day. The fans are gonna love it, they’re always begging us to get you on camera.”

“No problem, anything for you.” He clears his throat after whispering the last part, desperately hoping that you didn’t hear it. Even though you definitely did. You should go home for the day and leave him alone in the office so he can get back to work. You should stop staring at his lips that look so soft and just begging to be kissed. He should turn around and get back to the playbook and the computer but here he is, standing still right in front of you.

You’re just here, waiting for some to rip the carpet out from under you, to fall on your face, for someone to tell you that this isn’t actually happening. The space between your bodies diminishes significantly, so much so that you can smell the Dr. Squatch Birchwood Breeze radiating off of him. It’s intoxicating and you swallow the fear in your gut and ignore all of the common sense thoughts plaguing your mind, allowing you to feel.

The kiss is tentative at first, he pulls back slightly, whispering if it’s okay to keep going as you felt his breath against your lips. You don’t respond but instead pull him in closer, hearing a satisfied husky moan from him as he allowed your tongue access to his. His right palm rests against your cheek until he’s tilting your head up ever so slightly to deepen the embrace and he picks you up, holding on for dear life while closing and locking the door behind you. It was so much more than he imagined, these feelings that he’d been pushing aside were being confronted and magnified by the second. This innocent crush that you had on him were genuine, real feelings that created a deep ache in your bones, actively being soothed with his hands all over you as the two of you made out like helpless teenagers.

You didn’t think you’d have the strength to tear yourself away from him…until his phone rings. He ignores it the first time but it’s all you can think about by the fifth ring.

“Answer it,” you whisper breathlessly as he places you back on your feet. A thousand unspoken apologies are painted on his face as he pulls his phone out of his pocket. He keeps the call short and sweet but the look of devastation is clear when he hangs up. “You have to go don’t you?”

“I’m so sorry. We can—we need to talk about this I know. And I promise we will I just, I need to take care of this.” He doesn’t want to leave, not like this. Even if he knows you understand. Justin presses a kiss to the side of your head and whispers another “I’m so sorry” leaving you in the room to think about what just happened.

You walk around the empty parking lot until you reach your car, letting out a deep sigh at the thought of what the conversation with him is going to look like after this. You need to be mentally prepared for good news, bad news and everything in between.

He is the sun after all. And sometimes when you stand too close, you might get burned. And maybe, just maybe, you’d avoid the burn altogether and bask in the warmth as long as you can.

#Justin Herbert #justin herbert fluff #justin herbert imagine #Justin Herbert x reader #justin herbert fanfic

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chirpsythismorning · 1 year

Text

This makes me feel like Mike is lying and knows he’s lying in his monologue:

And…

And dot dot dot…?

El’s literally choking and Mike is frozen.

Will pushes Mike and tells him not to stop, reminding him of his speech in the van.

Then, even as he is about to say it, HE STALLS.

It’s clear Mike is having a serious internal conflict when it comes to saying I love you to El, and for a character whose most important rule is ‘friends don’t lie’ and whose sister had an identical plot line where she couldn’t tell her boyfriend I love you when she realized she didn’t love him and was starting to have stronger feelings for someone else, I feel like the answer is right there.

But the And dot dot dot just does it for me.

Like what is with the dramatics.???

It’s so weird to me because if the problem was as simple as Mike being scared of losing El, he wouldn’t have risked things by not saying it when she was crying in her room during their fight.

As the cop car was taking her away, it wouldn’t have been the perfect moment, and yet the way Mike said everything he could to reassure her but avoided simply saying the one thing he knew she wanted to hear, something that had her crying not even 5 minutes earlier, saying it could have been a way for Mike to comfort her in this moment of uncertainty.

Then there’s the letter, where El says from instead of love, and this is the last semblance of contact they have with each other, which has given Mike the impression that they had a fight they could never come back from. And so, he lost her in that moment. His greatest fear has apparently already come to fruition.

The rest of the season he continues to grapple with his insecurities and his concerns with where him and El stand, with Will reassuring him. He nods his head about someone he cares about not liking the truth. Him constantly talking about his conflict with El as if it’s something that cannot be fixed?? Dude it required 3 words?? And what reason exactly would he have to agree with what Will said, unless there is some truth he’s already aware of that he doesn’t think El will like?

And then their reunion in the desert happens. THIS could finally be the moment he makes clear to El how he feels. He hasn’t lost her, they’re back with each other and she’s safe and alive and happy to see him.

So why when she leans in fully, does he hold himself back (El’s face is perfectly symmetrical vertically with the frame when their foreheads meet, whereas Mike is more so leaning back horizontally as much as he can, doing his best to keep his mouth as far away from El as possible)?...

So, no kiss then?…

After they separate and smile at each other relieved, instead of making a point to say ‘that thing’, Mike decides to shift focus from them, to those around them, seeking our Will specifically.

At Surfer Boy, they get interrupted by Argyle and his pineapple pizza. Leading up to it, Mike doesn’t look like he’s about to confess this deep and emotional reason for why he couldn’t say I love you.

I guess… I dunno… I guess I just wanted to say that—

AGAIN WITH THE DOT DOT DOTS!

If Mike was going to say I love you, that would have been the most anti-climactic love confession in the history of television. He doesn’t sound like he’s about to tell her something genuine from his heart. He sounds like he’s about to say something because he feels obligated to.

And then that leading to the monologue, where there is more stalling…

Mike had soooo many chances to say it, and if he was truly scared saying it would make losing her eventually ‘hurt more’ (words inspired by Will’s speech), then he could have said it any one of those previous instances and could have saved them and their relationship.

Instead he treats it like no man’s land, as if it’s this bad word that isn’t an option, until it’s quite literally the only option.

I think that while it is heartbreaking, it makes Mike a very complex character. While he did lie, it was a pretty selfless act, because he was breaking one of his most sacred rules, he was lying. He put it off for sooo long for a reason. He goes against how he truly feels in his heart, and that’s in large part why they lose .

Another factor to all of this, that makes me think this is very likely, is again the major theme of friends don’t lie. And how there is one scene from s1 in particular that offers up a really good Mike and El parallel we could get for them in s5, that I think would make this whole situation and the buildup to it, just sooooo fucking layered.

Imagine something similar to this conversation in s5, but switch Mike and El around:

Rewatching all the seasons in general opens up a lot of possibilities for brainstorming about potential callbacks we could see in s5. When it comes to the importance and impact of lying in the story, with s4 being filled with characters lying, there is just something so full circle about s4 opening with El’s letter filled with lies, Will’s veiled love confession filled with lies that his feelings are El’s and the season closing off with Mike lying to save the world and as a result failing.

And then in s5, kind of bringing together all of these lies, with the truth this time.

Having a parallel to this, with El calling Mike out, would finally give her the chance to voice to Mike, face to face, how she feels truly about everything, and having it be in a way that will sort of put Mike in his place, in a similar way he did to her, would be kind of insane.

Not only that, but in doing so, along with making byler canon by the end end of the series, this entire scene in s1 could be re-contextualized to something much more incredible than it was to viewers in their initial viewing.

After s5, this scene would never be the same:

#byler #stranger things #Paladin breaking his oath #or whatever #shame and guilt or whatever

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howstrangethingshappen · 2 years

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mike and will's trauma

mike and will have so much trauma.

mike's best friend went missing, & when he thought he was dead, he was willing to jump off a cliff to where he thought will died.

will got kidnapped to the upside down by vecna, and all he wanted was his best friend and the love of his life to be there with him.

mike saw the demogorgon right in front of eleven, the same force that threatened his best friend, and he covered his ears because he was scared it would take her, too.

mike had to wait anxiously, horribly, for will to just wake up when he came back from the upside down.

mike and will had to help eleven face monsters from the upside down over and over and over again, not knowing if they would make it out alive.

and now, after having been through so much, they have been through even more.

mike and will are in different places for the first time in their lives.

mike thinks will doesn't want to talk to him since the line is always busy.

will thinks mike doesn't want to talk to him since mike only sends letters to eleven.

that friendship that got them through so much seems to be gone now.

and when they're reunited again, there is a rift between them.

there is only a few moments of peace for them to talk things through before it all starts happening again.

they are shot at by men looking for eleven and barely escape.

they watch an agent bleed out and die in front of them in the back of a van.

they have to help bury his body so the other government agents don't come looking for them, too.

will pushes mike and eleven together, because he cannot see a world in which michael wheeler loves him back.

mike squashes down his doubts and worries, because if his best friend believes in them, then surely he can make it work.

they come across a massacre, where they don't know if eleven is alive or dead.

they watch as eleven convulses and chokes on a table as she tries to fight vecna.

will watches as mike professes his love for her.

mike says words he doesn't truly believe in in order to save their friends.

they return to their hometown, and mike knows el doesn't believe what he said.

he hopes their fight with the upside down is finally over.

but will says he can feel vecna again... he knows who it is now, and that makes it all the more frightening.

and mike can't lose his best friend again. surely traumatic memories from years ago are flooding back into his head.

but he reassures will: "we will [kill him]," aka, "i can't lose you again."

they leave the cabin and cross the hill to find hawkins ripped apart by lava.

these two boys stand together, knowing their bond is one of the only things they have left.

they cannot lose each other, too.

#byler #byler trauma recap #these boys deserve so much better #let them be all happy and gay duffer brothers #this took so long btw #howstrangethingshappen

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callmedylan · 5 months

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some more security waiter + slight ness and Susie sibling AU headcanons while I work on more fazgang AU art

Ness is the type to play music when he wakes up to help energize himself, doesn’t help that he wakes up at around 5:30 AM and Mike has to deal with the loud ass musical theater music until ness leaves for work

ness has always loved theorizing but started intensely theorizing after susie went missing. Mike just has to sit there and be like “idk ness…that seems a little far fetched” (everything ness is saying has happened and mike knows it:

Ness loves baking, he can’t cook for shit but he can cook. Mike is the opposite and can’t bake for crap. So mike is in charge of cooking meals and ness is in charge of making the birthday cakes for Abby’s bdays (and mikes cause ness is just like that)

Mike loves ness to death but he cannot stand musicals, he finds them quite annoying but Abby and ness love them so he puts his hatred for them aside.

Ness and Susie’s parents use to take them to the same camp grounds as mikes family. They were there the day Garret went missing and ness often says how he had to leave because “some kid got taken”. Ness insists that him and Mike met a few times at the camp grounds but Mike can’t remember it so he constantly denies it.

Mikes is the big spoon, when he holds on to something it helps ground him while he sleeps so he doesn’t have a nightmare. Ness doesn’t mind at all but considering he’s taller being the little spoon is definitely an awkward position sometimes. (Tall guy issues)

The first Christmas the trio spent together after ness moved in, Abby ran in at around 4 am and jumped on top of them while they were asleep and in bed to tell them that “Santa came” (Mike wasn’t happy.)

Ness loves to dance, Mike has two left feet, they make it work.

When hanging out with the fazgang, ness and Mike will text each other (even if they are in the same room)

One time ness was talking about susie and Abby said “oh I know Susie! She’s my friend!” (Mike cut her off before she could finish tho and internally panicked)

Ness is a muppets enthusiast, has all the movies and song tracks, and even owns some memorabilia.

Ness has a replica of the Kermit puppet that he sometimes uses and he once accidentally left it sitting upright on the kitchen counter and when Mike went to get a glass of water in the middle of the night he turned on the light and screamed not knowing what it was (ness won’t let him live it down).

Mike is half Mexican and knows Spanish and ness asks him to “speak Spanish to him” sometimes because he thinks it’s romantic. He’d do this for a month or two before he recognized Mike say the word “chicken” and when he asked Mike what he’s been saying to him for the last month Mike goes “oh whenever you tell me to speak Spanish to you I just repeat a recipe I know”

Ness uses a concerning amount of hair spray (almost to a toxic level) so Mike makes him open a window whenever he’s getting his hair ready.

Ness and Mike once went on a date and left Cory with Abby and Cory ended up falling asleep on the couch so Abby, not wanting to wake him but still wanting to talk to someone, took their phone line and called 911 (it’s the only number she knows) and Mike and ness had to cut their night short to come home to reprimand Abby on who she calls.

#fnaf au #mike schmidt #securitywaiter #fazgang #fnaf susie #srry for making the fnaf movie gay #ness the waiter #abby schmidt #fnaf movie

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luulapants · 5 months

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Where Illinois politicians stand on Palestine

I sent a letter to Senator Tammy Duckworth today. Illinois is a solidly blue state, and I've dutifully voted blue no matter who since I started voting. Droves of people here have been writing to her and our Congressional Representatives, begging them to support a ceasefire, and all we will get back is a canned party-line response about Israel's right to "self defense" and the need to eradicate Hamas.

They are able to do this, to disregard the outrage of their constituency, because they feel certain that no matter how many letters we send, we will show up and vote for them when the time comes. They are certain their actions have no consequences, and even if they did, they would tell us that it's all our fault for failing in our democratic duty to vote.

Senator Dick Durban received about $154.5k from Israeli lobby groups. He has publicly called for ceasefire anyway. Their money was not worth a genocide.

Senator Tammy Duckworth received over $212k from Israeli lobby groups. She refuses to call for ceasefire. This was her going rate to enable genocide.

In my letter, I told her that I could not see pictures of dead Palestinian babies and turn around and vote for someone, like her, who had their blood on her hands. I told her that "vote blue" cannot extend to genocide. My ethics do not stretch this far.

14/17 representatives for the state of Illinois are Democrats. Of these, only 5 have called for ceasefire.

Jonathan Jackson: $3k from Israeli lobby groups. He has publicly called for ceasefire anyway. Their money was not worth a genocide.

Robin Kelly: $21.5k from Israeli lobby groups. She refuses to call for ceasefire. This was her going rate to enable genocide.

Delia Ramirez: $0 from Israeli lobby groups. She has publicly called for ceasefire. They knew she could not be bought.

Jesus "Chuy" Garcia: $0 from Israeli lobby groups. He has publicly called for ceasefire. They knew he could not be bought.

Mike Quigley: $43.5k from Israeli lobby groups. He refuses to call for ceasefire. This was his going rate to enable genocide.

Sean Casten: $61.5k from Israeli lobby groups. He refuses to call for ceasefire. This was his going rate to enable genocide.

Danny Davis: $0 from Israeli lobby groups. Yet he refuses to call for ceasefire. You can have his cowardice for free.

Raja Krishnamoorthi: $61.5k from Israeli lobby groups. He refuses to call for ceasefire. This was his going rate to enable genocide.

Jan Schakowsky: $58.5k from Israeli lobby groups. She has publicly called for ceasefire anyway. Their money was not worth a genocide.

Brad Schneider: $54k from Israeli lobby groups. He refuses to call for ceasefire. This was his going rate to enable genocide.

Bill Foster: $65.5k from Israeli lobby groups. He refuses to call for ceasefire. This was his going rate to enable genocide.

Mike Bost is a Republican. $14.5k and obviously no ceasefire talk. He will not be moved.

Nikki Budzinski: $25.5k from Israeli lobby groups. She refuses to call for ceasefire. This was her going rate to enable genocide.

Lauren Underwood: $0 from Israeli lobby groups. She has publicly called for ceasefire. They knew she could not be bought.

Mary Miller is a Republican. $0 - they don't even have to pay her to toe the party line. She will not be moved.

Darin LaHood is a Republican. $27.5k and obviously no ceasefire talk. He will not be moved.

Eric Sorenson: $0 from Israeli lobby groups. Yet he refuses to call for ceasefire. You can have his cowardice for free.

The Republicans will be trash regardless, but we cannot let our Democrats skate by thinking there are no consequences for supporting a genocide. They are slaughtering people with your tax dollars, Americans. It's time to get serious. It's time to tell these people that they cannot have our votes for free. It's time to start talking about primary opposition and third party voting. It's time to start exercising our power as voting citizens.

#political action #us politics #palestine #illinois #illinois politics #tammy duckworth

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kennahjune · 5 months

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Reread The Outsiders

Greaser!Eddie, Will, El, Dustin, and Jonathan and Soc!Steve, Mike, Max, Lucas and Nancy.

Steve and Jonathan having their fight at the beginning just like in the show and it knocks some sense into Steve as per usual.

Steve actually going out of his way to apologize to Jonathan on his own later that same night and having the door be answered by little Will. Will getting Jonathan and Jonathan and Steve stepping out on the porch to talk in private where Steve apologizes and actually admits that he fucked up.

But then Jonathan doesn’t fully forgive him (cause Steve said some pretty nasty things) and says something along the lines of “let everyone know just how sorry you are and maybe we’ll talk.” idk— but Steve then goes out of his way to apologize to both Nancy and Jonathan in the middle of the high school hallway and admits in front of everyone how much of a douche he was and how he wants to be better.

Eddie seeing this all happen and not knowing what the fuck is going on.

Rich Boy Harrington actually saying sorry? Admitting defeat? He calls bullshit. So he goes out of his way to watch Steve everyday after that— convinced it’s all an elaborate prank on poor Byers. But no. Steve is genuinely changing for the better.

And Eddie doesn’t believe that until Will and Dustin— some of Eddie’s favorite middle school sheep— are caught in the middle of a brawl with asshole socs Troy and James and the first people to help them are Steve, Mike and Lucas.

Mike and Lucas are just walking around. It’s like 10pm and really neither of them should be out right now but Ted was getting pushy and Mike needed some space. Space that included Lucas.

Will and Dustin are stumbling down the street, Will holding Dustin up after he got the worst of the hits. Will himself is sporting a nice black eye but he’s standing on his own— unlike Dustin.

Mike and Lucas are on them in a minute, both very worried and concerned for their wellbeing and health. Just as Mike is saying “fuck whatever Ted says you’re both coming home with me” Steve pulls up in the Beemer and they all get in.

When Steve asks if they have anyone they can call for Dustin (Steve already called Joyce and Jonathan) he insists on Eddie because his mom is asleep and doesn’t need to be woken up. She works an early shift in the morning.

Steve calls Eddie, seeing no problem with it as long as the kid is safe and happy and taken care of.

Eddie cannot believe that Dustin and Will got into a fight and honestly thinks it was Steve for a moment until Steve calms him down. Eddie and Steve chat, exchange numbers, and in no time Dustin is loaded in the van with Eddie and they’re off to the trailer park.

Joyce and Jonathan stop by as well, pick up Will and chat with Steve about what had happened. This is when Mike, Dustin, Will and Lucas form The Party.

They all exchange numbers yada yada.

The next day at school Jonathan and Nancy are both shocked to hear that Steve got into a fight with Mason Walsh and Rory Dante. Go figure; Steve had confronted them on how Troy and James had treated Dustin and Will the night before and they both were going on about how they deserved it. Throwing slurs left and right.

And well. Steve didn’t take that too kindly.

Needless to say, Steve’s parents are called and this is the moment that Jonathan and Nancy find out just who Richard Harrington is and why Steve used to be the way he was.

It’s also the moment that Hopper finally steps in and arrests Richard for child abuse and assault and all the good shit. But then his mom disowned him and Steve is suddenly on the streets. So Hopper also takes him in.

Which is where Steve meets El.

And idk where I was going with this but 60s Stranger Things AU with Greaser!Eddie x Soc!Steve :)

(With a side of Byler, Lumax (or Henclair and Elmax idk)

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familyvideostevie · 2 years

Note

hii if you’re still willing to take requests could I ask for an Eddie x reader where Robin introduces the two because of reader’s similar interests and taste in guys? I was thinking kind of like how Robin saw Nancy had a Tom Cruise poster but with reader and she sees that reader has a Dave Mustaine poster? “You have a Dave Mustaine poster?? You have a Dave Mustaine poster 😏” I’m sorry if it’s dumb lol thank you 💕

this cracked me up, honestly, and i love any chance to write dear robin as the best friend ever, hope you like it! | 1k, fem!reader, fluff, short and sweet, pre!relationship, Eddie is a gem, thank you for requesting this was not dumb!!!! <3

"You did not put enough sunscreen on, Robin," Nancy chides. "Your nose is already red."

"That cannot be true," your friend whines. "Steve watched me put on like, four layers. I'm just sweaty!"

The three of you are sprawled on a blanket in the park, half-heartedly watching the rest of the group play basketball in the summer heat. This is only your third or fourth time hanging out with all of Robin's friends, but she's done her best to fold you in after graduation. You don't question it too much, because you could use some people to hang out with as you figure out your life and the energy between all of these kids is something magnetic, something special.

They seem alright with your presence, even a little overenthusiastic. You made sure to lead with your endless pool of fun facts and for some reason once Max declared that the way you whistled really loudly with your fingers was "way cool," you were in.

"Nancy, you need to watch your shoulders," you tease. "We're all going to be lobsters pretty soon." She looks down at herself sharply before rolling her eyes at you and grabbing the sunscreen tube from her bag.

"Honestly, someone is going to hurt themselves. And it's going to be Steve." Robin looks at the court with disgust where Lucas and Steve are facing off under the basket. Dustin and Max seem to have taken it upon themselves to heckle from the sidelines, but Mike refuses to give up, trying his best to get the ball from Lucas and failing each time.

"This is embarrassing," Nancy mutters. "Bringing the Wheeler name down. I have to help him." She tosses the sunscreen aside and stands up, jogging over. "Mike! Get it together!"

"Oh, this is going to be good," Dustin laughs. "Robin, is Eddie coming?"

"I think so. Steve, when did he say he'd be here?"

"I'm busy, Robin! You're the one that invited him!" He jumps in the air to block Lucas from a shot and fails. Robin laughs.

"Well, I think he's coming," she says. You love Robin, but she's not great at hiding things from you. She can be a bit of a wall to new people or in situations when she's unsure of the people around her, but she's nothing but comfortable surrounded by her friends. So you can tell immediately that she's up to something, and tell her so. She takes a breath and launches into an answer for a question you didn't ask.

"Okay, so when we were hanging out last weekend in your room I saw the Megadeath poster on your wall and I thought wow, I've seen a poster like that before! And the blonde guy kinda looks like someone I know! So I tried to remember where I'd seen it and then I was like, oh, obviously there's the same poster on Eddie's wall and I thought wait, I don't think you guys know each other, since you're my friend from school and I introduced you to everyone else but he's never been free when you're free, I don't know how that happened --"

"Eddie...Munson, right?" you interrupt her. "Your friend? The one who sold weed in high school?"

"Yep!" she chirps, looking pleased with herself.

"Robin," you say, lowering your voice. "Are you trying to buy weed? Do you want my help?"

"No!" she says, exasperated, like you've missed the point. And you think you might have. "I'm trying to set you up!"

"Oh," you breathe out. "Oh, okay."

"Yeah?"

"Yeah." You smile at her. You know who Eddie is, obviously, and Robin is right, you room is practically wallpapered with posters of guys who look like him. You just always thought he was...kind of intimidating.

"Sweet! It's going to be great, even if you don't like like him, he's really nice and you can definetly talk about whatever shitty music you want--"

"Hey!" you protest, but it's interrupted by a chorus of greetings from the basketball court.

"Eddie!" Dustin cries. "Wanna play with us?"

"Oh, now you want to play?" Steve complains.

"Not on your life, Henderson," Eddie says, passing through the court with high fives for everyone on his way to the blanket. "Wheeler is way too scary."

"Oh, thanks man," Mike says, grinning.

"Not you, dude," Eddie teases. "Your sister." Everyone laughs but Eddie winks at Mike before the game starts up again.

"Hi Robin," he says as he stretches out on the blanket next to you. "Hello, new girl." He's got kind eyes, you think, kinder than you'd have expected. He's loose and seems happy, his biceps flexing as he leans back on his hands. You introduce yourself, trying not to be shy.

"Oh! Yeah, I've heard about you," he grins. "Got a lot of fans around here."

"Really?" You know the bond between all of these friends is something strong, something forged out of experiences you'll never understand. But the thought that they're willing to love you, too, fills your heart with such fondness your cheeks flush.

"Band geek over here told me you had a Megadeath poster on your wall, which is great, since no one in this circus of clowns has any god damned respect!" He leans into the joke a little, shaking his head like he's disappointed, but his mouth is curled up at one edge. Something in your gut tells you that Eddie Munson is someone who doesn't care what people like as long as it makes them happy.

Robin is too gleeful to be offended, eyes darting between the two of you. "I think I want to play after all," she blurts out and darts up towards the court.

"There is no way in hell that girl wants to play basketball," Eddie observes.

"No," you sigh. "This is a set up." He pulls his legs up and circles his arms around them, peering at you from under his bangs.

"Well, I don't mind if you don't mind." You really study him for a moment. Wide brown eyes, crinkled with the beginnings of a smile. He seems a little nervous, for all his bravado. He's sweating a bit, committed to his ripped jeans and general metal aesthetic and you think, damn. I want to know him.

"I don't mind," you tell him, and his grin is like the sun.

want to be added to my tag list for full-length (non-ask) fics? send me a message and specify for steve, eddie, or both! reblog, send feedback, requests open, masterlist here!

#reblog me plz #eddie munson x reader #eddie munson x y/n #eddie munson x you #eddie munson fluff #eddie munson #stranger things fic #stranger things x reader #stranger things fanfiction #stranger things imagine #its funny to write like #pre relationship but its cute #i think i got carried away with the gang here and not enough eddie but like #im feeling found family in this house tonight #anon ask #emma's asks

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findafight · 1 year

Text

That's vaapad. Is the first thing Dustin thinks, barely registering that the one dropped into a defensive stance, indigo 'sabre held tightly, is Steve.

Spacer Steve. Cocky, charming, snarky, kind, jaded, force-null Steve. Holding a lightsaber the colour of Illium's sky just past sunset, when it turns from dusk to night, stars flickering on, Steve is furiously stabbing and slashing at Vader in a way few know how to.

Because Vaapad was Master Windu's form, one he partially invented. One that very few had the control and discipline to practice without slipping too far into the Dark. Dustin had only seen Master Windu in exhibition duels, not full combat. It's very different when it's real, Dustin thinks.

Beside Steve, complimenting every move with synchronicity that comes from only the deepest and sacred of trust, is Robin. Robin who is a bit clumsy and doesn't like blasters, who drifts off in her own world sometimes, who's hands flutter whenever they feel. Where his is the cusp of night, Robin's saber is a brilliant sunrise orange, a blur as she pushes into Vader's defenses.

"go!" Steve yells, his focus slipping for a moment enough that Vader knocks his weapon from his hands. Dustin cannot move, cannot feel the tugging of Lucas on his jacket, or Mike shaking his shoulders.

Until they found El, who had barely escaped years of inquisitor conditioning, he had been alone. Had thought himself one of the only Jedi left. He had told Steve and Robin this, and they had looked at each other for a long moment. Steve had said "we are no Jedi, but we will protect you."

But he'd lied. They were Jedi, now facing down a sith.

Robin throws her own 'sabre to Steve even as she pulls his to her hand. They wield the blades as naturally as their own.

"RUN, NOW!"

Steve doesn't look away from Vader, but releases the double grip he has and throws his hand toward them, an invisible shove that pushes them all back to the door. To the shuttle. To safety.

Someone pushes Dustin away from the doors, and he watches as Vader raises his first in tandem with Robin's feet lifting off the ground. Steve is clutching his leg even as he reaches towards her.

The doors close.

Dustin doesn't realize he's screaming until Erica slaps her hands to his cheeks and forces him to look at her. "You need to pull it together. It's not gonna help them if we just get caught now."

He nods. Mike warns them to strap in for the jump to hyperspace. The jolt barely registers over his shaking.

"hey, man. How...uh. how are you doing?" Lucas's voice is softer, max standing behind him, clutching his hand so hard his fingers are squished together.

All he can gasp out is "why didn't they tell me?"

The rest are silent for a moment. It's a betrayal, this secret Robin and Steve kept. Dustin has been alone, for so long. He wanted to be close to his lost culture, to the people that are now few and far between, scattered in the stars and hiding. Why would they deny who they were? Their own People? When they could have taught him so much, revived something thought lost.

Gently, Lucas sits down, pulling Max beside him, and weaves his fingers between Dustin's trembling ones. They sit together for a long time.

Eventually, Lucas swallows loudly.

"I think..." Lucas, Dustin realizes, has been shaking too. They have all watched their friends, people who they love and have spent so much time with, sacrifice themselves to protect them all from the Emperor's guard dog. "I think that they were protecting us, by not saying anything."

"what?"

"Dustin. They're in their twenties. They probably fought in the Clone Wars. I just. I don't think they lied, really, about themselves."

Dustin rears back. "they said they weren't Jedi! That's a lie!"

Erica stirs, from Dustin's other side. He hadn't realized she was holding him.

"maybe it's not to them. Maybe...maybe they think of themselves as people who used to be Jedi. But aren't anymore. Maybe that's how they dealt with the war."

"but..." Dustin has never considered himself anything other than a Jedi, cannot comprehend shrugging it off even in the face of the Empire. "But why?"

Max, who has been silent, sniffs. "Because everything else they said was true." Mike, who retired from the cockpit Will and joined their cuddling hums questioningly.

She sighs. "Steve fell in love during the war, and planned a future raising little babies with whoever it was. Robin had a grand romance that was never meant to be with a politician or something. They've known each other since they were small."

"just now, we know they were doing that while fighting the Separatists." Lucas said.

"exactly. Think about it. I don't know who Steve could have fallen in love with, but... Mike. Didn't your sister have to work with a Jedi Padawan a few years before the Clone Wars? Didn't you say she got...weird? After? Robin was always weird about your last name..."

Mike goes stuff, even as Dustin barely registers anything about his sister, focusing on who Steve could have loved. A horrible, horrible possibility comes to mind that makes too much sense for how sad, heartbroken, confused Steve was about the "break up".

"oh stars." Says Mike. "Robin was the Jedi Nancy fell in love with before she fell for Jonathan. Oh no. She even said the Jedi had an orange 'sabre. Holy kark!"

Dustin sobs. Erica presses her face into his shoulder.

"Steve fell in love with a Clone." Bursts from his lips.

"what?" There's an overlap of voices. Shock, horror, confusion mixed together.

He shrugs. "It's the only thing that makes sense. Max, remember when he told us? About when they decided to be together? He said his--his love" and Dustin doesn't know if he says it as a dirty thing because the Clone troopers killed his family, or because Jedi very rarely had romantic relationships and he was still too young to understand the complexities of them for Jedi, or something else entirely. "Wanted to raise his little brothers. Protect them. Steve wanted...well I guess he must've wanted to be a creche master. They wanted to do it together. In the temple, at home."

Max joins. "He said That they'd spent a long time working together with his Ma, so--oh kriff, his force damned Master! That has to be it, right Dustin? That's like a parent for Jedi right? He...Steve said he watched her die. Watched...watched his lover die."

They are all silent, for a moment.

"do you think...do you think Steve had to kill him?" Mike asks, when only the rumble of hyperspeed fills the space.

Max counters with "Robin said she was on Coruscant when the Republic fell. What do you think she had to do? What she saw?" Dustin knows. Dustin saw the hallways. Saw the men in white armour who they all thought were friends massacre them in their home, led by some sith apprentice.

"I think they did what they had to to keep each other alive." Will says.

No one can argue with that.

Original post

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