#as long as everyone treats it in good faith and doesn’t attack anyone personally
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Do you think fandom can be sexist towards female characters?
I see the Jegulus fandom wanting to write Lily completely out of the picture and wolfstar people generally hate Tonks.
oof. i have…a very rambly, very long answer to this bc i don’t think it’s a simple yes/no so i’ll put this under a cut for people to skip if they wanna, yeah?
so, straight off the bat, im not a fan of using pejorative labels for writers in general but particularly for fanfic authors. for one, we don’t know who’s writing behind the screen + what their motivations/inspirations/intentions are. two, everyone writes for a different reason. perhaps someone is venting, or projecting, or using it as a therapeutic release; often it’s lifted straight out of their own life. so i try not to judge the text in front of me based on stuff like that. (this leeway could also be because i used to read a lot of bashing fics where the majority of them are women, i think, and often with the flimsiest, most irrelevant reasons that are straight out of the Sexism Handbook of Traditional Patriarchy too so maybe i just started rationalising it for myself? idk)
second, i think it’s pretty well known that the majority of fandom is some combination of women/queer/neurodivergent/POC etc etc. so applying the lens of ‘critiquing mainstream media produced by cishet men’ doesn’t…really work here, i don’t think. the way we would analyse sexism in say, marvel or disney won’t (shouldn’t?) be the same as how we do it for fandom imo.
that being said, it’s still entirely possible for certain ‘problematic’ tropes/ideas to be prolific, right? this is where the sexism u mentioned comes in. i prefer to use symptomatic language here so saying ‘xyz has sexist/x-phobic elements’ instead of an absolute ‘the work/author is sexist/x-phobic’ because i don’t think the latter is either useful or accurate. when it comes to this, there’s one really important thing i look for here. is the author aware of what they’re writing? (which is a whole other issue tbh, complete w why i feel more comfortable around darkfic authors but let’s not go there rn lol) because a lot of the authors who write out lily or tonks in these ships do so knowingly bc it’s the only way for their plot to exist/evolve. sure, you can have an amicable resolution but will it provide the conflict u need? will it make for good entertainment? will it lead to 3D characters?
stories often need an antagonist and is it unfortunate that women often end up filling the role? sure. absolutely. i’d argue that one of the reasons we have so many mlm ships compared to wlw is because of mainstream media giving us better written men more often than not. and i think it’s totally fine to feel angry/frustrated/upset about that, especially when it carries over into fandom which is supposed to be a fun, inclusive, safe space. i get really frustrated at a lot of wolfstar discourse that entirely ignores the possibility of bisexuality. the vehement insistence that that a certain character can’t be with a woman bc they’re queer, for example, rubs me the wrong way and i think what you’re mentioning is something similar too. but, i always stop myself from assuming malicious intent on the author/fic’s part bc just because they write/believe something in fiction doesn’t make it true, ykno? and i can always step back and go look for something else that’s more to my liking.
and i think every creator would have something like this in their works tbh. i certainly do. i know for a fact that the way i’ve written lily in shovel talk and the patronus fic isn’t exactly favourable to her—even though i’ve tried to be neutral, she has definitely come out looking worse than the others and i admit that that’s on me. i wanted a certain dynamic & characterisation for james & sirius and this was the way to achieve it. people are allowed to dislike that. but they must also acknowledge that i’m allowed to write her that way.
i think, more often than not, we end up looking at this in simplistic binaries. ‘i like this -> good -> allowed to exist’ or ‘i don’t like this -> bad -> shouldn’t exist.’ i’m…not a fan of that. my opinion is we should advocate for more mindfulness within our writing but allowing writers to craft their stories the way they want (bc ultimately fic is supposed to simple and fun and not something you agonise over). and this is all interlinked, right? because the moment we say ‘ok. this might be portraying women in an icky manner, i don’t like it but the author can do that bc it’s a piece of fiction’ then u open the gates for more responsible reading & writing. authors would feel comfortable tagging their works with this, they can discuss it openly w/o being worried about reproach or ‘being cancelled’ and readers can make a more informed decision. but if you go in guns blazing with ‘ugh this fandom is so sexist, look at how it’s treating its women’ then you’ve pretty much killed all possibility for dialogue and improvement and that’s not helping anyone.
this kind of also ties in with my previous point about having differing standards for mainstream vs niche mediums of art. fanfiction authors are often, ironically enough, held to higher standards than published/paid creators which is interesting bc u can argue that their work doesn’t even have the kind of social impact that mainstream media does.
anyway. i’ve gone off on enough tangents here lol but i think i’ll end it with this: yes, women definitely come off worse in certain spaces, especially when they have to compete with mlm ships but i think that’s a conscious decision that authors take within the bounds of the material they have. as long as they are conscious of the fact/acknowledge it, i think likening it to sexism isn’t fair because u can’t have a story without plot devices, uncomfortable as they might be. if you see a pattern in someone’s stories of women being constantly shunted aside negatively, then i think u can take note of it and avoid it. maybe have a conversation with the author if they’re willing to talk about their creative choices. i feel like that’s the most u can do when it comes to online writing where u have no idea who’s on the other side of the screen.
#fandom wank#just in case#i’ve actually thought about this a lot tbh#partly bc of my own reading habits (present + past)#partly bc it crops up as ‘discourse’ far too often for my peace of mind#and i tend to stay out of it bc i don’t like the way in which unfolds#it feels too cult-like for me most of the time#and everything is always taken in bad faith#but yeah. it doesn’t mean i don’t have Thoughts™️ on it#(when do i not lol)#i hope ive managed to explain things decently here?#if there’s anything that’s…off then hey dialogue is always welcome#as long as everyone treats it in good faith and doesn’t attack anyone personally#i edited this 3 times to cut down on useless stuff and i still feel like i’m just rambling aimlessly here smh#not having an absolute answer was a deliberate choice and not me waffling about#bc i don’t think u can just narrow it down to a yes or no#but that’s just me#i know some people have stronger opinions on either side#which is totally valid tbh#it’s everyone’s individual experience that forms their view#and mine caused me to arrive at this#i can also acknowledge i’m often in a headspace to be able to take this sort of neutral/good faith approach#bc i don’t rly have triggers or squicks#that’s not the case for everyone so some would feel more strongly about this#so having a variety of opinions comes in handy here#pen’s asks
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“always an angel, never a god” and making it about the robins with batman is heartbreaking and all but have you considered:
the robins to the previous robin.
robins 2-5 looking at robin 1. the hero worship, the love they have for dick grayson. they want to live up to “the golden boy” “the golden standard”. they want to make him proud.
but dick grayson himself? he looks at batman, in his eyes he doesn’t live up to his mentor. sure he thinks he’s good, but it’s not like he thinks he’s the best. to himself, he isn’t “the golden child”, he’s not “the golden standard”, there’s too many mistakes, too many sins, to make him view himself the way others view him
“always an angel, never a god.”
Anon are you providing a sample? Drop the album!!
Just - Perfect.
There's actually a time when Damian is feuding with Tim about something and he's like Grayson is the "Golden Child", Todd is the "Black Sheep", and you're something something. He didn't actually say "something something" but you get the point. Damian doesn't like to be forthcoming with his words, but - "We were the best, Richard. No matter what anyone thinks." THOSE WORDS CAME OUT OF HIS MOUTH. The fact that Damian literally calls him the golden child tho is literally ascending me. He loves his dad.
Jason gets fear-gassed once in Truth & Justice (2021) comic and it reveals that one his worst fears has always been about living up to the massive legacy Dick left behind. There's a change in the way Dick is portrayed because Jason is terrified of Nightwing, not Dick. Because he knows that Dick loves him and stuff but Nightwing is downright petrifiying. Because Nightwing and as Robin, Dick created the firsts for everything. The first partner, the first side-kick, the person who created their world. Not just Jason's but Dick opened up the gateway to Every. Single. Hero. That came after him. And he did it perfectly. He excelled in every aspect imaginable and then surpassed them to create the golden standard that every single person that came after strived to touch. Not just for what they should do, but who they should be.
Tim straight up tells Dick to his face every time that Dick is the best robin that ever existed. No squalms, no hesitation, it's just pure fact for Tim. There is simply, no one better.
Batman/Catwoman: The Gotham War: Scorched Earth
Stephanie didn't have a lot of interactions with Dick and she wasn't close to him but she still had a huge deal of respect for him. It was almost deference, the way she treated him. I considered that it might be because he was Batman but she treated Batman very differently than she treated Dick!bats.
But despite literally every single Robin thinking how perfect Dick is, how unattainable he set the standards, Dick himself feels so pale in comparison to his mentor.
I wrote this post a long while back regarding Dick's thoughts of insecurities about bruce to the tune of Toxic Thoughts by Faith Marie which pretty much encapsulates all his worries. But the thing is, even Bruce tells dick how amazing he is and he's so much better than him, and he means it.
There's a time when Bruce fights each of his former robins and he takes them all down easily but he's trekking his way to the last one and he's says "Attack of the Robins, that leaves only the first one. Hand-to-hand, the toughest of them all." He says this all in his mind. Which means when he tells Dick he's better, he really means it but Dick? Dick will never, ever understand the weight of Bruce's sincerity towards him. He always thinks he's not a good enough leader, good enough detective, good enough whatever there is. In his mind he will never be good as Bruce in anyway because for him Bruce is the best person to ever exist. For him, despite everyone in the entire superhero community exalting him and singing his praises, he feels he'll never be like his hero.
"always an angel, never a god."
Anon, that - 😌🤌✨
Glorious. Simply a magnificently apt description.
But you know who this insecurity really affects more than him?
The Robins! Literally everyone else!
You know, there's actually panel about Roy that explains how he feels about Dick's insecurities towards Bruce-
Arsenal Issue #2
And the reason why I brink it up is because I think this is exactly how Jason feels about Dick. In Jason's eyes there is no one better than Dick and it's a nasty feeling that the person he thinks it the best feels inferior to someone else.
Tim also has opinions on the same line except in his case, he hates Dick's unconditional loyalty towards Bruce (yes I'm referencing gotham knights). He loves Bruce but he hates that Dick loves him to the point that he'll follow him endlessly because he has this romanticized, rose-sunglasses view of Bruce. WHICH IRONICALLY ROY ALSO FEELS-
The Titans (1999) Issue #15
Gotham Knights Issue #26
Where it bothers Roy and Jason that Dick would think anyone is better than him, it rankles Tim and Roy that he's being subservient to a mentor he's far better than.
Even Steph was like, "Dude we need you. Where were you?"
Batman and Robin Eternal Issue #2
And Dick's like "Bruce needed me.."
Batman and Robin Eternal Issue #2
He looks so tired, doing God's bidding. But this aligns perfectly with the fact that Bruce has a canonical god complex AKA consistently inflated feelings of personal ability, privilege, or infallibility. People who have god complexes are highly dogmatic in their views, meaning the person speaks of their personal opinions as though they were unquestionably correct.
Literally and metaphorically he's an actual angel because he works as a messenger of God (Bruce in the DC world) and is the epitome of goodness, someone who always offers comfort and aid to everyone.
#He's always so kind and good regardless of the consequences he'll recieve from his goodwill and if that isn't an angel then what is?#dick grayson#bruce wayne#jason todd#red hood#tim drake#red robin#damian wayne#robin#roy harper#arsenal#stephanie brown#spoiler#batman
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Triggering content and topics of racism, harassment, cancel culture, and media literacy are below. This is extremely long and has nothing to do with any of my works or BTS, but addresses the recent cancellation of creators on this platform and some personal statements I want to make.
For anyone who isn’t aware, once again there are people using @/chaibts to attack people. I don’t want to act as a mouthpiece for M, but as a friend and a fellow content creator, it’s really frustrating to see someone chased off of this website by anonymous users on a forum where none of the conversations being had, or accusations being made appear to be in good faith or from well-intentioned submitters.
I think a lot of what is being posted on this blog is being posted in bad faith under the guise of holding creators accountable. This blog is primarily being used by individuals who allow no room for other opinions, nuance, context or for the people accused of certain content to defend themselves or apologize and grow if needed. I do want to say that there are some submissions on the blog that have done a great drop of calling attention to issues with users in the community, but a majority of the submissions are not.
Disclaimer: I am completely aware that not all of our experiences are the same and that each individual person experiences discrimination and racism differently and I’m not negating that. I am aware that my experience as an American-born Latina makes all of my experiences with racism, discrimination, and microaggressions different than people from other non-white communities, and my entire experience and interpretation of this scenario are based on my experience. I am not, at any point, under the impression that my experiences are the groundwork for making accusations.
I say all of this to provide context for the next part, which is that the scene that someone(s) found to be written from a place of racism, I beta-read for and helped M with. When I use the word racism in this context, the original poster believes that this scene was written with the specific intent to attack Asians, and that the scene displaying discrimination against Yoongi was from a place of bad faith, as well that there is no scenario in which a white creator should depict any sort of discriminatory transgressions, as they cannot perceive racism or discrimination.
Because I beta-read it and because I helped with this area of the fic, I feel like I should speak up and take some responsibility, and I want to say that M did ask others about the scene because it was incredibly important to show the discriminatory action in an impactful and respectful way. M, from this scene’s inception, asked thoughtful questions and asked me directly if the experience made sense, referencing my time working in a hotel where I first-hand witnessed similar dealings and experienced it myself. We talked about what the scene meant, how it reflected the real-life struggles of BTS in the Western music industry, and how it felt for someone to experience this in their career. As someone who has faced micro-aggressions my entire life and career - particularly in regard to my accent - I resonated with this scene, but I realize that may not be the case for everyone.
I in no way think I am the sole vocal piece for all marginalized communities nor do I think that my experiences dictate this discourse alone, so what I did not find triggering does not mean that it wasn’t. There is a difficulty when trying to showcase the struggles of marginalized groups in media, and it doesn’t always resonate the way it’s intended.
To reiterate: I am not Asian. I am Cuban-American, and very much a white Latina, and benefit from the fact that people treat me as a normal white person until I speak with an accent, which makes my experience very different than anyone else visibly not-white. It is entirely possible that the reason I was not triggered or did not find this scene troublesome was because I am not the specific ethnicity mentioned and I 100% acknowledge that. I also did not see an issue with a white creator showing this moment, however, I also understand that not everyone feels that way and that is completely acceptable.
I’m not going to delve in and give a dissertation on how discrimination should and should not be represented in media and who should be able to write about it, but I wanted to talk about my relationship to the scene mentioned, because it leads me to what I really want to talk about on this platform.
What I want to talk about as the main issue is the cancel culture and bullying on this platform. What I have seen lately on Tumblr, including this ‘tea’ blog, is a complete refusal by people to consume media with any sort of media literacy and without any willingness to have nuance. M is not the only creator who has been bullied off of Tumblr recently for something that, to me, warrants a conversation and not a hate campaign. This is happening more and more, and I am constantly seeing anonymous users in the ask boxes of content creators calling them racist, queerphobic, sasaensgs, fetishizers, and everything in between for the most ridiculous takes.
When I say that people are ‘chased’ off of Tumblr, I do not mean with pitchforks and torches of the masses who are rightfully escorting a wrong-doer off the internet. I mean by the constant harassment from one person or a small group of people who refuse to let anyone explain, refuse to give anyone apt time to respond, and refuse to accept any sort of response whether it’s editing the work in question, someone going on hiatus to think about whether or not they feel as though they’ve done wrong, or leaving entirely so that they’re no longer contributing to the discourse. This is the way our new ‘accountability’ system works, especially behind the protection of anonymity. It’s easy to feel as though you’re doing something right when there is nothing to tie you to the responsibility of your words and accusations.
It’s incredibly difficult as a friend and a content creator to see multiple people be bullied from this platform by users who absolutely refuse to believe anything but their own interpretation, and I think we are trivializing a lot of actually problematic topics by the approach being used. Accountability IS incredibly important, but the current trend is that no version of accountability is enough. Editing or deleting the story isn’t enough, an apology isn’t enough - nothing is enough.
If we are going to be a community that holds people accountable, we have to also allow the people we are accusing to respond, and apologize if/when necessary. We also have to consider if the content we personally find triggering is ACTUALLY at its core troublesome and problematic, and consider that our opinion is not the collective. We have to consider that if the collective community being referenced is telling you that they do not see the same problem that you do, they’re not also in the wrong, but might have a different perspective.
Anything else sort of just feels like a hate campaign with no true desire to protect the community they are speaking “on behalf” of. Especially in this instance, where there are now bipoc creators being attacked for having the audacity to defend a white creator. Why can members of the community being represented not provide their opinion on it without being insulted and called names? Is it, perhaps, because you cared more about getting rid of the person than you did about the issue? That’s what this translates to, especially when the previous stance of protecting a group becomes attacking that group because they don’t agree. When you begin attacking the members of the group you were originally trying to protect because it no longer fits your narrative, you negate any type of goodwill you entered the conversation with.
Again, this is my very limited and personal experience and I am open to the possibility that my take isn’t the right take or I am in a small minority that feels this way. I want this to be a safe community for everyone but in order to do that, we also have to consume content with an ounce of willingness to have nuance and give people a modicum of time to respond appropriately.
For the record, I know that this take and conversation is not for everyone, and I completely respect it if you no longer feel comfortable interacting with me. This is an uncomfortable topic. I may not be the best to represent a discussion on cancel culture on this website. I may not be the best to represent conversations on discrimination inclusion in fics. However this was something I was involved in, and it’s hurtful to see a friend suffer from what I think a lot of people agree to be something that was not worth this in the first place.
Reblogs are turned off because I have no interest in anyone dogpiling any creators or risking spreading bad takes. I wrote this purely because I felt like it needed to be said, and I am sure there will be negative repercussions, but that is the risk of existing in this space online.
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Beautiful YA Book Quotes
inspired by @enchantedwritingdesk - feel free to edit or change pronouns for rp purposes- varied subjects of quotes all considered beautiful written by critics in the realm of Young Adult books of all genres
“You may be born into a family, but you walk into friendships. Some you’ll discover you should put behind you. Others are worth every risk.”
“If you have two friends in your lifetime, you’re lucky. If you have one good friend, you’re more than lucky.”
“Don’t get stabbed. It makes everything awkward.”
“We who have means and a voice must use them to help those who have neither.”
“Broken isn’t the same as unfixable."
"Some walks you have to take alone."
“Only the very weak-minded refuse to be influenced by literature and poetry.”
“Ah coffee. The sweet balm by which we shall accomplish today’s tasks.”
“Brave doesn’t mean you’re not scared. It means you go on even though you’re scared.”
“Don’t get stabbed. It makes everything awkward.”
“You should eat a waffle. You can’t be sad if you eat a waffle”
“Making a decision isn’t about knowing every potential consequence. It’s about knowing what you want and chasing a path that takes you in that direction”
“When I read, I feel emotion all on my own. Emotion no living person is making me feel.
“The real courage is in living and suffering for what you believe.”
“I think that maybe forgiveness is like change—it comes in small steps.”
“People really are like houses with vast rooms and tiny windows. And maybe it’s a good thing, the way we never stop surprising each other.”
“Even in its first faint traces, love could alter a landscape. It wrote unimagined stories and made the most beautiful, forbidding places.”
“I am coming to terms with the fact that loving someone requires a leap of faith, and that a soft landing is never guaranteed.”
“If you want to rebel, rebel from inside the system. That’s much more powerful than rebelling outside the system.”
“The measure of a man is not how much he suffers in the test, but how he comes out at the end.”
“Sometimes, when people get treated as less than human, the best way to help them feel better is to simply treat them as human. Not as victims. Just you as you.”
“We can’t know what’s going to happen. We can just try to figure it out as we go along.”
“Books are easily destroyed. But words will live as long as people can remember them.”
“What is the point of being alive if you don’t at least try to do something remarkable?”
“The funny thing about armor is that it doesn’t just keep other people out. It keeps us in. We build it up around us, not realizing that we’re trapping ourselves.”
“Take care not to listen to anyone who tells you what you can and can’t be in life.”
"Maybe some people are just meant to be in the same story."
“When people don’t express themselves, they die one piece at a time.You’d be shocked at how many adults are really dead inside—walking through their days with no idea who they are, just waiting for a heart attack or cancer or a Mack truck to come along and finish the job. It’s the saddest thing I know.”
“Sometimes the best way to find out what you’re supposed to do is by doing the thing you’re not supposed to do.”
“Our private tastes in books showed a hint of our secret selves.”
“Hope can be a powerful force. Maybe there’s no actual magic in it, but when you know what you hope for most and hold it like a light within you, you can make things happen, almost like magic.”
“I feel like I need to speak out, because if no one speaks out, if no one says, this is me, this is what I believe in, and this is why I’m different, and this is why that’s okay, then what’s the point? What’s the point of living in this beautiful, great melting pot where everyone can dare be anything they want to be?”
"The universe is bigger than anything that can fit into your mind."
“Time comes to us softly, slowly. It sits beside us for a while. Then, long before we are ready, it moves on.”
"I can't seem to be a pessimist long enough to overlook the possibility of things being overwhelmingly good."
"You could rattle the stars. You could do anything, if you only dared. And deep down, you know it too, and that's what scares you the most."
“Just because you can’t experience everything doesn’t mean you shouldn’t experience anything.”
"Things were rough all over but it was better that way. That way, you could tell the other guy was human too."
“Each of us must confront our own fears, must come face to face with them. How we handle our fears will determine where we go with the rest of our lives. To experience adventure or to be limited by the fear of it.”
“We are, largely, who we remember ourselves to be. That’s why habits are so hard to break. If we know ourselves to be liars, we expect not to tell the truth. If we think of ourselves as honest, we try harder.”
"Youth cannot know how age thinks and feels, but old men are guilty if they forget what it was to be young."
“Words are how others define us, but we can define ourselves any way we choose.”
"I know that the whole point—the only point—is to find the things that matter, and hold on to them, and fight for them, and refuse to let them go."
"It does not do to dwell on dreams and forget to live."
“I believed, and still believe, that you can build your dreams brick by brick. That you can accomplish anything with persistence.”
”A woman needs a man like a fish needs a bicycle.”
I really hate this expression. I bet fish would totally want bicycles.”
“It was impossible to feel alone in a room full of favorite books. I had the sense that they knew me personally, that they’d read me cover to cover as I’d read them.”
"And now that you don't have to be perfect, you can be good."
"Child, no one is ever ready for anything. I would never doom you to that. What sort of adventureless life would that be?"
"The words were on their way, and when they arrived, she would hold them in her hands like clouds, and she would ring them out like the rain."
Maybe who we are isn't so much about what we do, but rather what we're capable of when we least expect it"
“She delighted in the smell of the ink, the rough feel of the paper between her fingers, the rustle of sweet pages, the shapes of letters before her eyes.”
“It’s amazing how the more you read, the less you know.”
“Our private tastes in books showed a hint of our secret selves.”
"It's a lot easier to be lost than found. It's the reason we're always searching and rarely discovered--so many locks not enough keys."
"As long as there is love and memory, there is no true loss.”
"Because sometimes chance and circumstance can seem like the most appalling injustice, but we just have to adapt. That's all we can do."
"Books are my friends, my companions. They make me laugh and cry and find meaning in life."
"I'm done with those; regrets are an excuse for people who have failed."
"Becoming fearless isn't the point. That's impossible. It's learning how to control your fear, and how to be free from it."
"Don't be afraid of death; be afraid of an unlived life. You don't have to live forever, you just have to live."
"We believe in the wrong things. That's what frustrates me the most. Not the lack of belief, but the belief in the wrong things. You want meaning? Well, the meanings are out there. We're just so damn good at reading them wrong."
"There's no shame in fear, my father told me, what matters is how we face it."
Why would you be given wings if you weren't meant to fly?"
"People never really died. They only went on to a better place, to wait a while for their loved ones to join them. And then once more they went back to the world, in the same way they had arrived the first time around."
"I wanted a love thick with time, as inscrutable as if a lathe had carved it from night and as familiar as the marrow in by bones.”
"You can never visit the same place twice. Each time, it’s a different story. By the very act of coming back, you wipe out what came before.”
"Goodbye, I say, goodbye, as I disappear little by little into the middle of the middle of my own spectacular now."
"People find it far easier to forgive others for being wrong than being right."
“You don’t get to choose if you get hurt in this world, but you do have some say in who hurts you."
“I trust you to find the good in me, but the bad I must be sure you don’t overlook.”
"We need never be hopeless, because we can never be irreparably broken."
“It's like being in love, discovering your best friend.”
“Sometimes there’s beauty in the tough words. It’s all in how you read them.”
"But if I'm it, the last of my kind, the last page of human history, like hell I'm going to let the story end this way...Because if I am the last one, then I am humanity. And if this is humanity's last war, then I am the battlefield."
"If there's one thing I've learned, it's this: We all want everything to be okay. We don't even wish so much for fantastic or marvelous or outstanding. We will happily settle for okay, because most of the time, okay is enough."
“I wonder what it’s like to have that much power over a boy. I don’t think I’d want it; it’s a lot of responsibility to hold a person’s heart in your hands.”
"Grief and love are conjoined, you don’t get one without the other. "
“You need to be yourself, but you also shouldn’t feel like you have to fight everyone, even yourself, to be it.”
“I bet you could sometimes find all the secrets of the universe in someone’s hand.”
“Break my heart. Break it a thousand times if you like. It was only ever yours to break anyway.”
"Doubt everything at least once. What you decide to keep, you'll be able to be confident of. And what you decide to ditch, you will replace with what your instincts tell you is true."
"Home isn't where you're from, it's where you find light when all grows dark."
“There are times when the world is rearranging itself, and at times like that, the right words can change the world.”
“We all bear scars ... Mine just happen to be more visible than most.”
"But even if we don’t have the power to choose where we come from, we can still choose where we go from there."
"Just as a river by night shines with the reflected light of the moon, so too do you shine with the light of your family, your people, and your God. So you are never far from home, never alone, wherever you go."
"You spend your whole life stuck in the labyrinth, thinking about how you'll escape it one day, and how awesome it will be, and imagining that future keeps you going, but you never do it. You just use the future to escape the present."
"When she jumped, she probably thought she'd fly."
"Things are rough all over."
“I think you can sort of slip out of your life and it can be hard to find a way back in.”
“To make a thing as simple as an apple pie, you have to create the whole wide world.”
"That's the thing about pain. It demands to be felt."
"All those other things, they are the glass that contains the lamp, but you are the light inside."
“And in that moment, I swear we were infinite.”
#open rp#open to all#open to anyone#ask meme#open meme#open to anybody#rp meme#ask prompt#roleplay meme#memes#open starter#book quote meme#ya books#book quotes#these shallow graves#tfios#divergent#Amy and roger’s epic detour#clockwork angel#roleplay musings#rp musing#ask rp meme#meme starter#meme rp#ask memes
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ACOTAR THINK PIECE: ELAIN ARCHERON, UNTOUCHABLE
*DISCLAIMER*
This will be a long post.
Please take the time to read this post in its entirety and truly reflect on the message I am trying to send before commenting. My goal is to use my background in Gender and Women’s Studies to deconstruct the comments I have seen on Tumblr and Twitter and bring awareness to the ACOTAR fandom.
The reason I am tagging “Elriel” in this post is to call attention to the arguments in the Elriel fandom that: weaponize Elain’s femalehood to shame real life people for their opinions about Elain’s character and her relationship with Lucien; victimize Elain’s character in fandom discussions; and coddle Elain’s character, which limits fandom discussions about her narrative development and prevents the ACOTAR fandom from holding Elain accountable for her actions and inactions in the same way that the fandom holds other characters accountable for their actions and inactions. It is for these reasons that I WILL NOT remove the “Elriel” tag from this post because all of the above points contribute to the toxic discourse surrounding Elain’s character.
I urge those who use these arguments to understand their implications, why they are problematic, regardless of intent, and reexamine their contributions to the ACOTAR fandom. I WILL NOT tolerate anyone who tries to twist my words and say I am attacking people and their personal shipping preferences. In fact, I AM CRITIQUING THE ARGUMENTS THEMSELVES NOT THE PEOPLE USING THE ARGUMENTS.
Also, I highly encourage the Elriel fandom to read this post because it addresses how the concept of choice as an argument enables arguments to exploit social justice and feminist languge in order to vilify Elucien shippers, among other problematic things.
Elain Archeron is one of the most polarizing characters in the ACOTAR fandom. Though opinions about Elain vary, arguments in the Elriel fandom cite society’s perception of traditional female characters in comparison to non-traditional female characters as the reason behind the hate, and this belief is used to provide an explanation as to why other characters in the series are favored over her. In the series, Elain is portrayed in a wholly positive light and this image carries over into the Elriel fandom, painting her character as a good and kind female who has been unfairly wronged and a victim of circumstances that were out of her control. When arguments in the Elriel fandom oppose other viewpoints in the fandom, they fall into one of three categories:
Category 1: Weaponize Elain’s femalehood to shame real life people for their opinions
Maybe people who hate Elain are just jealous of her in a weird way similar to when someone hates the pretty, nice, and charming girl in school just because she is too perfect
Disliking Elain is misogynistic
What happened to feminism? What happened to women supporting women? What happened to she can say no? All of that disappears the second you force Elain to be with Lucien
Elain antis are misogynistic
All Eluciens are Elain antis
Antis claiming they’re feminists when in reality they hate on Elain and Feyre but love Nesta
Elain antis are such sore losers. Y’all were that bunch of people who could not get over being rejected from hanging out with the cool kids so y’all are projecting your hatred towards pretty people now to get validation
I don’t get how Elain’s love for gardening equals boring for some people. I’m sorry your misogyny finds traditionally feminine activities boring
Why are you attacking a female? What did Elain do? Where are your feminist voices?
The fandom is misogynistic towards Elain
If people loved Elain they would ship Elriel
If you hate Elain it says a lot about your feelings toward women
If you hate Elain because she has no “development” then you must hate Azriel because otherwise you’re misogynistic
Eluciens are turned off by the idea of a woman that has the autonomy to reject a man for the simple reason that it is her choice
Eluciens are all about feminism and “it’s HER choice” until it comes down to females not wanting a male
Eluciens don’t respect Elain’s feelings when they ship her with someone that was part of her trauma and makes her feel uncomfortable
The way some Elucien shippers completely disregard how uncomfortable Elain is around Lucien is so hilariously not funny. Prioritizing being mates over Elain’s feelings is just regressive
It’s hard as a fan of Elain to see someone ship her with a person who makes her physically uncomfortable to be around. Wouldn’t you want both characters to be happy to be around each other
Imagine if SJM saw all the awful things her “stans” had to say about Elain
It’s true that we know comparatively little about her, but is she really boring or do you just not value stereotypically feminine traits?
So y’all are just gonna tell me you prefer Elucien over Elriel? Even though Lucien treats Elain as if she’s something that belongs to him? The only reason he wants to be with her is because she’s his mate, he doesn’t respect her, doesn’t treat her as his equal, even though that’s what mates should be? He doesn’t bother to look past what’s on the outside to see her for who she is. And Elain is obviously repulsed by the idea that she should belong to anyone or have no choice in who she can be with. Azriel is her friend and the only person who sees her quiet strength. He has so much faith in her, in her abilities; he’s the one who kept her company when no one else did, he’s the only one who bothered to see her for more than her brokenness. You’re going to tell me you still prefer Elucien over Elriel?
The more I see Gwynriels that ship Elucien out of their hate for Elain, the less I can understand Elain stans that ship Elucien. Pls Elain has made it very clear that she doesn’t want Lucien, why would you ship her with him? Do you hate her too? Smh
The real question would be, if you care and understand Elain why would you ship her with Lucien (where she canonically shrinks when he is near)?
People crying over Helion and Lucien’s mom not getting to be with each other and her being forced into a relationship she didn’t want, but also ship Elucien? Just say you hate Elain
When Elain’s book is out, Gwyn stans will look like clowns and I will laugh because they set her up by shipping her with Azriel just because they hate Elain. Watch them play the victims now because Elriels are clapping back the hate they’ve sent towards Elain
As romantic as wanting girl who is visibly uncomfortable around a guy who caused her trauma to end up with the said guy. Guess their standards for romance are in hell
Category 2: Victimize Elain’s character
Gwynriels only want Gwyn with Azriel because they despise Elain
Gwyn stans and Gwynriels are Elain antis
No one in the books dislike Elain, so why are there so many people who do?
Elain hasn’t done anything wrong or questionable to warrant the hate she gets
Not having Elain’s POV makes it easy for people to be swayed a certain way about her character if you already don’t relate to her in some way
It’s been years since this series came out and we haven’t gotten a lick of an Elain POV, but people still hate her for what? We don’t know her thoughts, dreams, or aspirations
We haven’t even had Elain’s perspective yet and people are passing these judgments off on her
Elain antis who say she’s boring are just cruel when she has obvious symptoms of PTSD like Feyre and Nesta
Gwyn is one of the most overhyped characters and that’s only because most people hate Elain and they couldn’t wait to find a random girl to ship Azriel with
Nesta was abusive to her sisters but Elain (who has only ever been kind) is painted as the villain
From the text we know that Elain is the epitome of feminine stereotypes (gentle, gardening, baking, non confrontational for the most part). Yet people still call her boring or deny that she has any interesting character traits?
You can’t love Nesta and hate Elain
People hate Elain because of internalized misogyny and lack of taste. All the girl does is tend to her garden and mind her business and they treat her worse than Tamlin
Does Gwyn deserve all this support? Of course yes! She is amazing! But where’s that support when Elain was in the same situation as she? Where’s that support for her right now? Why do they idolize Gwyn for her interactions with Azriel and hate Elain for having any interaction with him?
It’s not even a ship war anymore, they just hate Elain
People hate Elain for no reason
Some of y’all don’t like feminine traits and it shows
We know less about Eris and Helion but people don’t call them boring. Why would rejecting femininity make Elain more interesting?
Elain has had a lot forced upon her
The main reason I believe most people love Gwyn so much is to get Azriel away from Elain. It’s not a secret that Elain has been a widely hated character for years so suddenly we get a new female who has a minimal amount of interactions with Azriel and BOOM. New ship that once again doesn’t make sense (just like Azriel x Emerie after ACOFAS)
Elain hasn’t done something so terrible for her to get this hate. At this point some of you are just being misogynistic and you don’t want to accept it. Don’t call yourselves feminists and then say bs like this, it’s embarrassing. She’s pretty and everyone agreed to hate on her
Just a personal feeling, but I feel like a lot of the Elain hate stems from internalized misogyny. That to be a strong female lead, you need to pick up a sword and fight. That to be strong, you need to adapt traditionally masculine traits
Elain is feminine. She is beautiful. She loves to bake and garden. She is docile, quiet, observant, and a people-pleaser. All traditionally feminine traits. Yet for some reason, she’s like the worst in these people’s eyes?
I think also maybe a lot of people can’t relate to her femininity? That her being so beautiful and quiet doesn’t allow for the people who dislike her not to self-insert? Most of the hate stems from people not wanting Elain to be with Azriel. It’s mean, but maybe the people who hate Elain literally just can’t self-insert if they have a story and that’s why they’re vehemently against it?
Poor Elain. The Cauldron dealt her a bad deal. Upon emerging as Fae, she is immediately declared by Lucien as his mate, never mind that she was already engaged to a prick. Her love life is not good
It blows my mind how they really think that they can compare all the shit that Elain gets with some dumb jokes about Gwyn on Twitter (and yes, the “hate” towards her started mostly because Elriels are clapping back, it was bound to happen)
I would think of it as anti-feminist with Elain and Lucien because she has consistently stated that she does not want him so if she was forced to embrace the bond that would be taking away her right to have a choice but with Az she feels comfortable around so if they were mates then Elain would be happy and feel safe which again should be the priority for women to feel safe in their relationships with anything and to not be forced into any type of situation aka the mating bond in this
Category 3: Coddle Elain’s character
Elain has value the way she is, in all her domestic girly glory. Not every character has to be badass
We don’t speak of Elain’s flaws frequently because everyone else already speaks badly of her, mainly in an unfair way
There is definitely something deeper going on with Elain but by no means will she ever be evil or any less feminine. That goes against everything we already know about her
It’s ok to critique Elain because she needs growth but y’all keep forgetting the shit her and her sisters went through
The last “bad” thing Elain did in ACOTAR was not help Feyre when they were impoverished and I’m tired of people acting like she’s a terrible character when it was their father’s responsibility. It happened 4 books ago and Feyre has forgiven both Nesta and Elain
Elain’s character and the evil Elain theory are a great example of the trend where people only consider female characters interesting if they reject femininity
We don’t know enough to hate Elain
Many people want Elain to turn evil (which in my opinion seems to come from a place of internalized misogyny)
However we don’t tend to talk about her faults, at least not publicly, as that has been, and still is, done to death, and I--personally, at least--find it much more fun to theorise about potentially interesting aspects of the overall plot, than dwell on negatives
And ultimately, I would be shocked if Elain has a more karmically-charged story than Nesta, considering that Elain’s “wrongs” are so much less severe and bad than Nesta’s, and Elain has already apologized for them (or paid the price in other ways, like through what Graysen did)
I guess I also think Elain has suffered and been punished enough. I hope her story is about finding hope in terrible situations, and learning to love her new life, and choosing her own path after everything that has been done to her. I don’t think she needs to be punished anymore or face any additional trauma
Also, why is she being judged on her decisions as a human at all? Fae are monsters to humans! They enslaved them for thousands of years, and the Wall was erected to keep them out
Like I’m sorry, but think Elain would want to leave her ONLY FAMILY AND FRIENDS for the Spring Court where she has no one because--oh look, lots of flowers!--is the craziest thing I have ever heard
Her sisters are in the Night Court. Her nephew is in the Night Court. Her closest friends (Nuala and Cerridwen) are in the Night Court. Her love interest is in the Night Court. Her extended family is in the Night Court. Her home is in the Night Court
SJM isn’t going to keep two sisters together and split up the third. Especially not keep Feyre and Nesta together and separate Elain. They were either all going to end up in separate places, or together. Not 2 here and 1 there
Compared to the other female characters in the series, Elain is the only character whose femalehood is at the center of conversations; this is because arguments in the Elriel fandom fixate on it when discussing her character. While Elain, Feyre, Nesta, and Mor are all representations of white womanhood and white beauty, Elain epitomizes the most fragile version of white womanhood. It’s easy to blame society’s perception of traditional female characters in comparison to non-traditional female characters when it comes to the discourse surrounding Elain’s character because it: falls in line with the fixation on Elain’s femalehood to silence opposing viewpoints; is a simplistic explanation that fails to tackle the underlying issues with Elain as a character, the same issues that are downplayed in-universe; absolves Elain of her wrongdoings; prevents the ACOTAR fandom from holding Elain accountable for her actions and inactions within the series; and diminishes the impact Elain’s actions and inactions have on those around her. It’s not that Elain is hated in the fandom because she’s a traditional female character; it’s the fact that arguments in the Elriel fandom deflect a critical analysis of Elain’s character because she’s a traditional female character who embodies the ideal white woman in need of protection. White fans and white-aligned fans of color, especially white women, have a tendency to vehemently defend, gatekeep, and coddle white female characters in fandom; this makes it difficult for other fans to engage in critical discussions about these white female characters because they’re viewed as flawless and all around perfect characters despite evidence to the contrary. Since Elain is viewed positively by the other characters in the series, it has rendered her character untouchable to any perceived slight or criticism in fandom discussions because those negative opinions challenge what has been said about her character thus far. And as a result, her character has been placed on a pedestal and implicitly hailed as the epitome of white womanhood; and when she’s criticized, it’s seen as a direct attack against white womanhood. Arguments in the Elriel fandom: exploit feminist language and perpetuate white feminist tactics under the guise of defending Elain’s character; center Elain in conversations about female oppression in the ACOTAR world and uphold white feminist ideologies in their critique of ACOTAR’s patriarchal society; and use the fragile white woman narrative to victimize Elain in Lucien’s presence, playing into racial biases that are associated with white supremacy’s defense of white womanhood.
Feminism is a social movement that seeks to promote equality and equity to all genders, and feminists work toward eradicating gender disparities on a macro-level, in addition to challenging gender biases on a micro-level. As feminism became more mainstream, a flat and oversimplified version of feminism emerged: mainstream feminism. The mainstream feminist movement is meant to represent all women, but rarely does it center conversations around issues that concern most women. The problem with mainstream feminism is that it’s just a popularized version of white feminism. White feminism has relied extensively on an individualized understanding of women’s oppression, exclusively from the lens of privileged white women. White feminism only focuses on the oppression experienced by white, able-bodied, affluent, educated, cishet women; and it views gender as the key mode of privileged white women’s oppression, isolated from the privileges granted by their other social identities. White women can be and are oppressed under the patriarchy but only because they are women; their identity as women does not exempt them from the privileges granted by their whiteness. The term white feminist does not mean any feminist who is white, but refers to feminists who prioritize the concerns of privileged white women as though they are representative of all women. However, the term is not exclusive to white people. Because white feminism is so pervasive, people of other racial and ethnic backgrounds often buy into white feminism, believing that if they work hard enough, they may be able to reap its rewards.
Just like white feminism, mainstream feminism only recognizes the identity of being a woman, assumes that all women share common experiences of gender oppression, fails to address other social identities in relation to overlapping systems of oppression, and disregards privilege in relation to various social identities. Just like white feminism, mainstream feminism is palatable because it doesn’t seek to challenge the systems in place, instead its goal is to succeed within them. Essentially, mainstream feminism and white feminism are extensions of performative feminism. Performative feminism is a type of performative activism that’s used to describe feminist views that are surface level and solely for the benefit of one type of person. It’s a pretense which often has nothing to do with genuine activism. Arguments in the Elriel fandom normalize and promote performative feminism because the topic of feminism is only referenced when discussing Elain. This indicates that these arguments are engaging in disingenuous discourse to push a personal agenda within the ACOTAR fandom, and it becomes more apparent when they use white feminist tactics to shut down opposing viewpoints:
White feminists weaponize and exploit feminist language to silence the opinions of other women, especially when they’re called out for their problematic behaviors
White feminists use the phrase “Women supporting women” to defend other white feminists who exhibit problematic behaviors instead of holding them accountable
White feminists weaponize phrases like “Women supporting women” and “You just hate women” to attack other women who disagree with them on any given topic
White feminists use phrases like “All women face challenges” and “Stop pitting women against each other” to sidestep conversations about privilege
White feminists divert conversations away from privilege and towards the Trauma Olympics to equate their struggles to the oppression of marginalized people
White feminists skirt around the realities of other forms of oppression and discrimination, downplaying the experiences of marginalized people
White feminists diminish or ignore the ways in which gender oppression affects other marginalized people
White feminists paint those they harmed as aggressive, mean, or divisive when confronted with the ways they have harmed a marginalized group
White feminists deflect criticism by focusing on the anger or emotions being expressed rather than the issue that is being discussed, invalidating the concerns of marginalized people
White feminists speak over marginalized voices in an attempt to sound “woke”
White feminists get defensive and insist there’s no way they could be a part of the problem because of what they’ve done to help marginalized groups already
White feminists say they don’t see color in an attempt to obscure racial issues that need to be addressed
White feminists center and victimize themselves in conversations about racism, which derails necessary conversations from taking place
White feminists who are white weaponize the intersectionality of their race and gender to avoid accountability
Feminism is not meant to be approached from an individualistic perspective nor is it only about addressing the experiences of privileged white women, it involves addressing the intersections of race, class, gender, sexuality, (dis)ability, and other social identities as well; and it involves addressing how these social identities relate to privilege. Moreover, feminism is not about women upholding complete loyalty to other women because of a shared gender identity, and to claim that it does implies that women should be held to different emotional standards than men. If men are able to dislike and criticize other individual men, real or fictional, without their characters being compromised, why aren’t women granted that same privilege?
It’s clear that SJM set up the ACOTAR world to mirror a patriarchal society, and that the imbalance of power between males and females stems from sexism. Arguments in the Elriel fandom analyze the ACOTAR world through a feminist lens to show how ACOTAR’s patriarchal society, to which the mating bond is innately tied, contributes to female oppression and limits their agency. When choice and free will are emphasized as part of Elain’s arc, they imply that Elain, through the mating bond, experiences female oppression under ACOTAR’s patriarchal society because of her identity as a female with that identity being the focal point of her oppression in the world. Elain is one of the most privileged characters in the ACOTAR world: she’s High Fae; she’s the sister of the High Lord and High Lady of the Night Court, which gives her access to wealth and political influence because of that connection; she’s able-bodied; she was magically blessed by the Cauldron; and she lives in Velaris, a place that grants females autonomy and power because of the beliefs of Rhysand and Feyre. Arguments in the Elriel fandom trivialize female oppression in the ACOTAR world because they disregard the fact that Elain’s privileges prevent her from experiencing female oppression in the same way that other marginalized females in the world do. The mating bond being one such example because those around Elain are not forcing the bond on her, instead they’re allowing Elain to reach a decision about the bond for herself; a privilege that other marginalized females in the world probably wouldn’t have. Just because Elain has endured hardships in her life and is a female in a patriarchal society, they do not erase the privileges she holds within the ACOTAR world. The failure to include Elain’s privileges in discussions about Elain being a female in a patriarchal society feeds into white feminist ideologies because white feminism operates from a very narrow perspective; it doesn’t take other intersecting identities into account when it examines gender oppression, leaving no room for discussions about privilege (or lack thereof) in relation to those intersecting identities. When discussing oppression in hierarchical societies, it’s imperative that privilege is also included in the conversation because privilege and oppression are not mutually exclusive; they equally affect the ways in which people navigate those societies through their social identities.
Rather than attributing Elain’s uncomfortability to her new life as a Fae female or the mating bond itself and her trauma to the Cauldron, the King of Hybern, or Ianthe, they’re placed on Lucien to cast his character in a negative light. Moreover, fandom discussions portray Lucien as a possessive character to further emphasize Elain’s discomfort despite the inaccuracy of this characterization in canon. Arguments in the Elriel fandom play into racial biases when it comes to Lucien (a male character of color) because they mischaracterize his character in order to victimize Elain (a white female character), placing her character in the role of the white damsel in distress. In Western society, the concept of womanhood has been conceptualized from a Eurocentric perspective with femininity and feminine attributes favoring white women. It’s the idea that a certain type of femininity is only inherent to white women as they are seen as the embodiment of an ideal womanhood. White womanhood has been a symbol of innocence and purity, and white women have been viewed as fragile beings in need of protection. The reason white womanhood functions within white supremacy is because it’s the same idea that has motivated white men to kill and beat black and brown men. The so-called protection of white women has been used as a justification for the horrific violence committed by white men because black and brown men were stereotyped as aggressive and seen as a threat to the virtue of white women. The white damsel in distress trope considered white women as worthy of protection because of their perceived innocence and purity; women of color were not granted that same treatment because they did not fit into the ideal image of womanhood. Over the years, this trope became a means for white women to exercise limited power in a patriarchal society with white women weaponizing their status as the damsel much to the detriment of black and brown men. It’s through the white damsel in distress trope that white supremacy sustains its dominance in Western society. The misrepresentation of characters of color in fandom, the dismissal of their importance to the overall story, and using them as tools in arguments centered around white characters are the foundation of fandom racism; they’re examples of how racism moves silently in fandom spaces. Instead of examining their behavior and taking constructive criticism from fans of color, white fans will often double down on their bigotry and center their uncomfortability in the conversation when confronted with their complicity in fandom racism. White fans expect fans of color to swallow fandom racism in its many forms in order to not ruin the experience of fandom, dismissing the fact that racism is prevalent in nearly every aspect of society. This mentality ensures that no one is held accountable for the harm they caused and alienates fans of color in fandom spaces.
To reiterate what I mentioned in my first think piece: terms like “oppression”, “the right to choose”, “feminist”, “feminism”, “anti-feminist”, “anti-feminism”, “internalized misogyny”, “misogyny”, “misogynist”, “sexist”, “sexism”, “racist”, “racism”, “classist”, “classism”, “discrimination”, and “patriarchy” are all used in specific ways to draw attention to the plight of marginalized people and challenge those who deny the existence of systems of oppression. Yet these words and their meanings can be twisted to attack, exclude, and invalidate people with differing opinions on any given topic. When social justice and feminist terms are thrown around antagonistically and carelessly to push a personal agenda, it becomes clear that these terms are being used to engage in disingenuous discourse and pursue personal validation rather than being used out of any deep-seated conviction to dismantle systemic oppression. Being an ally, activist, or feminist is not an identity, it’s a practice. It requires: ongoing self-reflection; holding ourselves accountable; listening to marginalized people; educating ourselves; dismantling implicit biases; challenging those around us who are exhibiting problematic behaviors; and action behind our words.
It’s important to be aware of the language that is used within the fandom when defending or critiquing characters and ships. It’s also important to question how an argument is framed and why it’s framed the way that it is to critically examine the intent behind that argument: is it used as a tool to push a personal agenda that reinforces problematic behaviors, or is it used as an opportunity to share, learn, enlighten, and educate?
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Tagging: @spell-cleavers @bookofmirth @m0bulidae @ilya-boltagon
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warmth [zuko]
Pairing: Zuko x reader
Requested?: yes!: “maybe running from fire nation and hiding in a cave with zuko? zuko and reader think they each hate each other but they rlly don’t 👀“
Summary: You and Zuko get separated from the Gaang and things happen :)
w.c. ~3.1k
.masterlist.
~
The day had started out normally.
You were the second person to wake up, Zuko being the first. You rubbed your eyes sleepily, crawling out of your sleeping bag and walking over to Appa, patting the sky bison before grabbing your bag and reaching for a peach that you had stuffed away. When peaches were present, Momo couldn’t be trusted.
“You really take that whole ‘I rise with the sun’ thing to heart, huh?” you asked dryly, sitting across from the prince. He huffed lightly, crossing his arms before looking away. You smirked smugly, knowing that his silence meant that he couldn’t think of a comeback.
The silence didn’t last long before Zuko turned back to you. “Spirits! Could you chew any louder?”
“I don’t know, let me try,” you replied, chewing obnoxiously. Zuko glared at you before standing and walking away, turning slightly so you couldn’t see the faint smile tugging at his lips. You stared after him, biting back a smile of your own.
The group was already used to the banter between you and the scarred prince. It had started way before he joined the Gaang, back when he still had that god-awful ponytail and thought that capturing the Avatar would restore his honor. He had aimed a plume of fire just a bit too close to you and you had let one sly remark slip, your jaw dropping in shock when the prince responded in kind.
Ever since then, you always made sure that you pissed Zuko off whenever you had an encounter. It was just too easy to rile him up.
That didn’t change when he joined your side. If anything, it got worse. You didn’t miss a single opportunity to get on his nerves and eventually, Zuko found himself anticipating your remarks. It gave him a sense of normalcy. You didn’t treat him any differently than you ever had and as weird as it was to admit, he didn’t mind the attention you bestowed upon him. Of course, he couldn’t deny that you had really gotten on his nerves that one time he had lost his firebending.
It was silent in the clearing after Zuko walked away, and you proceeded to make everyone breakfast. A while later, everyone emerged, mumbling a sleepy thanks as you handed them a bowl of rice porridge. The six of you sat in a circle around the small campfire, enjoying the small moment of peace you had.
“Thanks for breakfast, (Y/N),” Katara said softly, smiling at you over the rim of her bowl.
“Yeah! This is amazing,” Sokka said, tilting the bowl to get the last of the porridge into his mouth.
“I thought it was a little bland,” Zuko commented off-handedly. Your eye twitched as Aang gave a nervous chuckle. Katara looked at you worriedly as Sokka tried to ignore Zuko’s comment. At your lack of response, Zuko smirked and opened his mouth yet again. “I’m certain that Momo could’ve made us a better breakfast.”
“Next time, make your own damn breakfast,” you snapped, slamming your bowl down onto the ground before turning to face Zuko. “Oh wait, that’s right. Poor little Prince Pouty doesn’t know how to do anything for himself!”
“At least I know how to control my temper,” Zuko shot back, glancing at your now-cracked bowl.
“Oh that’s rich coming from the guy who once set me on fire because I accidentally spilled some water on him!” you replied, remembering the unfortunate incident. You now had a very prominent scar on your leg as a reminder.
“Guys,” Aang called out. “Maybe we should save this for later.”
“Really?” Zuko asked, jumping to his feet. “What about the time you almost stabbed me because I accidentally stepped on Momo’s tail?”
“Hello? You stepped on Momo’s tail!” you cried out, jumping to your feet as well. “He hates you now!”
“Well at least Appa likes me,” Zuko said, thinking about the time Appa threw you off his back because you had accidentally yanked his hair.
“Appa does like me,” you snapped, a groan emitting from the sky bison as he agreed with your statement.
“Guys!” Aang yelled loudly, getting your attention.
“What?!” you and Zuko snapped in unison.
“Look behind you,” Sokka said quietly, his boomerang ready in his hand. You whirled around to see a group of Fire Nation soldiers standing amongst the trees. A low hiss escaped you as you smacked Zuko’s arm.
“See what you did?” you asked, your eyes never leaving the soldiers. “Your yelling led them straight to us.”
“My yelling?” Zuko scoffed, getting into a defensive position. “If I recall correctly, it was actu-”
“Guys!” Toph yelled angrily, sending the two of you a harsh glare. “Now really isn’t the time for this.”
You nodded sheepishly, readying yourself to fight as well. The six of you quickly realized you were outnumbered and realized that your best possible option in that moment was to escape. You all gathered up your supplies quickly, rushing towards Appa. A guard stepped in front of you suddenly, knocking you down before aiming a blast of fire at you. You rolled out of the way, leaping to your feet before sending a kick to his head and knocking him down.
“Yip yip, Appa!” Sokka yelled, sitting at the reins.
“Wait!” Katara cried. “(Y/N) is still down there!”
“What?” Sokka screeched, looking down at the ground as he tried to locate you. He noticed a group of soldiers trying to surround you as you fought them off.
“Go!” you yelled, waving them away as you began to run the other direction.
“We’re not leaving you!” Aang yelled, getting ready to hop off of Appa.
“I’ll lead them away and then meet up with you,” you replied, rushing off. “I promise! I’ll be fine.”
You were gone before anyone could say anything else, disappearing into the trees as half of the soldiers followed you. The other half turned their attention to Appa, ready to attack.
“Yip yip,” Sokka cried again, receiving disbelieving looks from everyone else. He gave them a shrug, trying to hide his worry. “She’ll be fine. She’s gone through worse. C’mon we can’t lose faith in her.”
The rest of the group nodded softly, sighing in relief as Appa left the ground. Their relief was cut short when Zuko leapt off of Appa, landing on the ground and kicking his leg to send out an arc of fire towards the remaining soldiers.
“Zuko! What are you doing?” Katara yelled, looking over the edge of the saddle in a panic.
“Go,” came Zuko’s rough reply. “I’ll stay with her. I’ll protect her.”
It was silent as the group watched Zuko sprint away. Appa didn’t stop and Sokka made no effort to bring the sky bison back down to the ground, watching as Zuko fought off each soldier effortlessly. He hummed lightly, drawing everyone’s attention to himself as he turned his attention back to the reins. “You know, I’m willing to bet five gold pieces that by the time we find them, they will have smooched at least twice.”
Toph grinned at Sokka’s statement, her fear of flying temporarily forgotten.
“Oh you’re on, snoozles.”
~
You weren’t sure how you had managed to evade the soldiers for as long as you had. You were out of breath, panting heavily as you sprinted through the forest. Looking around, you knew you needed to find somewhere to hide. No matter how good at fighting you were, you knew that you couldn’t fight off all those Fire Nation soldiers. As you darted between the trees, your ankle got caught on a tree root and you went tumbling onto the ground. You groaned as you laid on the ground for a moment, opening your eyes to get a bearing of your surroundings. Your eyes narrowed when you noticed a gap in the cliff a few yards to your right. It would’ve been unnoticable from any other angle and you silently thanked your clumsiness for leading you to safety.
“She went that way!” you heard a soldier shout. Biting back a gasp, you scrambled to your feet and sprinted to the opening in the cliff. You squeezed inside, pulling on some of the hanging vines around it to better conceal your location. You head faint footsteps coming your way and you stilled, crouching down to get a better look outside.
Stifling a groan, you darted outside, grabbing the person by the collar of their shirt and dragging them back inside the cave with you.
“H-Hey what’s your problem?” Zuko asked as you pushed him up against the cave wall. You shushed him softly, placing your hand over his mouth. His skin heated up under your touch and he froze for a moment before snapping out of it and grabbing your wrist, pushing you away from him.
You stumbled slightly before landing on your butt, scowling at Zuko but remaining silent. You cocked your head to the side as you heard footsteps walking by.
“We lost them,” a gruff voice said, sounding a lot closer to the cliff than you liked.
“They can’t have gotten far,” another voice replied. “We’ll set up camp in the clearing over there. The prince is too valuable to let go.”
A noise of agreement was made before the footsteps faded and you found yourself walking up to Zuko and pulling him down by the collar of his shirt.
“What are you doing here?” you hissed quietly, still on edge.
“Saving you, that’s what?” Zuko snorted, once again gripping your wrist and forcing you to let go of his shirt.
“No! Now they’re going to hunt us,” you replied, turning around and walking away. “They would’ve given up sooner or later, Zuko. I’m not important. But now they won’t leave because you came after me!”
“So now you’re upset?” Zuko asked, whisper-yelling. “I took out half of those soldiers! You’re welcome.”
“Yes I’m upset. Now because of you, we’re stuck in here!”
Zuko’s eyes widened as he realized you were right. There was no way that the two of you could leave the cave, not with the Fire Nation soldiers camping out a few yards away. He cursed under his breath before observing you. You had walked to the other side of the cave, leaning against the wall and sliding down until you were sitting on the ground. He looked outside, noticing the sun going down and walked towards the entrance.
“Where are you going?” you whispered, keeping your eyes on him.
“I’m going to get some firewood. I’ll be quiet.”
“Are you serious right now, Zuko?” you asked exasperatedly. “We cannot start a fire in here. They’ll see the smoke escaping through the entrance.”
Zuko paused for a moment, knowing you were right before walking over to you and taking a seat a few feet away from you. “It’s getting dark out. It’ll get cold soon and something tells me that Aang isn’t going to find us that quickly.”
You looked at the entrance to the cave, knowing that he was right. It was getting darker by the minute and without a fire, you were in for a cold night. Zuko watched your expression, getting a bit worried. As a firebender, he had no issue with the cold; but you weren’t a firebender and he was worried about you.
Silence engulfed the two of you as night fell. The temperature fell ridiculously quickly and you found yourself curled up into a ball as you tried to warm yourself up. You shot a glance towards Zuko, scowling deeply when you noticed him lost deep in thought. He was sprawled out on the ground, not shivering at all as he stared up blankly at the ceiling. You rolled your eyes, looking away before hugging yourself even tighter.
“Can you stop your chattering?” Zuko asked suddenly, turning his head to look at you. “It’s quite distracting.”
You glared at him, shivering lightly. “I’m sorry, is me being cold inconveniencing you? Not all of us can firebend, Prince Zuko. And my teeth are not chattering!”
Zuko didn’t reply, instead standing up and walking over to you. You glanced up at him suspiciously, frowning when he took a seat right next to you. He wrapped his arms around you, pulling you close and avoiding your gaze.
“Zuko, what are you doing?” you whispered, unable to move your face from where it was buried into his neck. Zuko shivered at your words, keeping you tucked into him as he tried to control his blush.
“Keeping you warm,” Zuko replied. “What does it look like?”
“Why?”
“What do you mean?” Zuko asked softly, tilting back slightly to meet your eyes. You avoided his gaze, curling into him even more. He was exceptionally warm, and you felt yourself sinking into him to avoid the chilly air within the cave. Zuko’s arms tightened around you as he shifted, bringing you into his lap as he made himself more comfortable.
“You hate me,” you whispered, still hiding your face from him. Your arms snaked around his waist, allowing you to dig your face into his chest and hide even more.
“W-What? No I don’t!” Zuko cried, earning a shush from you. “If anything, you hate me.”
“N-No I don’t!” you exclaimed, pulling away slightly to look up at him.
“Yes you do!”
“Why would I hate you?” you asked, looking at him with a bewildered expression.
“I don’t know!” Zuko said, a confused expression on his face. You thought he looked rather cute. “I get why you would hate me back when I was the bad guy, but I’ve changed! I thought that by now you would like me.”
“Zuko, I never hated you,” you replied. “Not even back when you were the ‘bad’ guy. You were always fun to banter with and I thought that you wanted things to stay that way.”
“What on earth gave you that idea?” Zuko asked, looking at you in shock.
“Oh, I don’t know. Maybe the fact that you always had something to say in return to my remarks,” you stated, looking at him blankly.
“Well you always start it,” Zuko accused. You paused for a second, knowing that he was right.
“Well you always reply!”
Zuko let out a frustrated groan. “That’s because you keep teasing me if I don’t.”
“Okay, but that’s becau- mmph.”
Your eyes went wide as Zuko pressed his lips to yours, effectively shutting you up. You froze for a split second, not believing that this was happening. Zuko pulled away, a smirk on his face as he took in your flushed face and dazed expression.
“Not so mouthy now are y-”
This time it was you who cut Zuko off, pressing your lips to his almost feverishly. Your arms left his waist, coming up to wrap around his neck and pull him impossibly close. Zuko responded better than you did, immediately returning the kiss and angling his head just so in order to deepen it. You melted against him, causing Zuko to smirk into the kiss before he began trailing kisses down your neck.
A gasp escaped your mouth as you felt him leave a mark on you before you tangled your hands in his hair, pulling his face back up to kiss him again. You couldn’t remember feeling cold anymore, the feeling of Zuko’s lips on yours and his arms around your waist erasing any thoughts about the chilly air in the cave. Now all you could feel was warmth.
“In case it wasn’t clear, I like you,” Zuko muttered into your ear, pulling away from your lips for a second. You shivered at his words before leaning your forehead against his.
“In case it wasn't clear, Prince Pouty, I like you too,” you teased, giving him a shy smile. Zuko snorted at the nickname before kissing you gently, a stark contrast to the way the two of you were kissing only minutes earlier.
“Toph! They’re kissing!”
Sokka’s head was poking through the cave entrance, looking at the two of you in shock. In the midst of your confessions, the Gaang had found the Fire Nation soldiers and defeated them, knowing that you couldn’t be too far away. Toph had been the one to find the cave, using her seismic sense, but Sokka had insisted he be the first one to enter.
“Aw man,” Toph called out, pushing Sokka out of the way and forcing her way into the cave. “How many times did you lily livers kiss?”
You and Zuko exchanged surprised looks before looking at your two friends embarrassedly. You were still in his lap, the two of you ridiculously close to one another. Overall, you had been caught in a very compromising position.
“U-Uh, I don’t know,” you stuttered, avoiding Toph’s blank gaze. Even though she couldn’t see you, you knew she was judging you.
“We didn’t exactly keep count,” Zuko drawled. You slapped his chest. “But if you want we can add a few more.”
“No!” Sokka and Toph yelled in unison. Sokka covered Toph’s eyes as Zuko pressed his lips to yours, catching you off guard.
“I’m blind!” Toph grumbled, causing Sokka to look at her sheepishly.
“Oh, right,” Sokka replied, removing his hand and carrying Toph so that her feet were off the ground. “That’s better.”
“Just tell us if you kissed more than two times,” Toph said, hanging limply from Sokka’s arms.
“Oh we definitely did,” Zuko said, a smirk on his face as you squeaked in embarrassment.
“Ha! You owe me five gold pieces,” Sokka yelled triumphantly, accidentally dropping Toph. The small girl landed on the ground, scowling deeply at both having been dropped and losing the bet.
“Yeah, yeah. Whatever, Snoozles. If you need me I’ll be outside,” Toph grumbled, stalking out of the cave. You shared an awkward glance with Sokka, who had a large grin on his face as he stared at the two of you.
“Uh, anything else you need?” you asked the Water Tribe boy.
“No,” he replied, the smile never leaving his face. “We’ll be waiting outside when you’re done. Have fun, but not too much fun.”
Groaning, you dropped your head onto Zuko’s chest. Sokka let out a loud laugh as he left and Zuko simply rolled his eyes before looking down at you. Using his index and middle fingers, he tilted your chin up, bringing your face up so that he could look at you. A bright blush spread across your cheeks as you met Zuko’s golden eyes, the urge to look away growing stronger as his gaze dropped to your lips.
“Now, where were we?”
~
taglist!
@musicalkeys, @mywigglybaby, @bubblebars, @iguessthefloorislava, @dekahg, @boxofteenageideas, @bottledcostcowater, @butterflycore, @coldlilheart, @the-firebender-girl, @ajediherowitchrunner, @lammello, @astroninaaa, @samsmultifandomblogs, @sadskater25, @oddment-niwit-blubber-tweak, @eternallyvenus, @emberislandplayers, @sunflowerazula, @moonnei, @stilllivindue2spite,
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God hates gays and I do too. That's not homophobia it's just following the word of god
i would normally block you or tell you to shut up, but as someone who believes in christianity ─ this is completely wrong and it’s really sad that some people think this way. i know this is way different from my normal blog content but i want to clear this up the best way i can.
the bible does NOT say to hate gays. it does say. . .
1. that God equates hatred of another person to murder
“Everyone who hates his brother is a murderer, and you know that no murderer has eternal life abiding in him.” John 3:15
“But whoever hates his brother is in the darkness and walks in the darkness, and does not know where he is going, because the darkness has blinded his eyes. ” John 2:11
“We love because he first loved us. If anyone says, ‘I love God,’ and hates his brother, he is a liar; for he who does not love his brother whom he has seen cannot love God whom he has not seen. And this commandment we have from him: whoever loves God must also love his brother.” John 4:19-21
by your logic (following the word of God), you’ve already failed to do that. i’ve actually read the whole thing, which not a lot of people who pull things out of their ass have, and never once does it say to hate gay people or to hate anyone in general. the only thing it says to hate or that God hates is Satan and evil. it says here multiple times in the verses i just provided that hatred is what’s wrong and that you can’t call yourself someone who follows him if you hate people.
2. that God died for ALL sins and ALL sins are forgiven
so, just entertaining that homosexuality is a sin (which i don’t believe it is), God says he died for ALL sins. the most famous verse of the bible specifically says:
“For God so loved the world, he gave his only begotten son so that whoever believes in him should not perish but have everlasting life.” John 3:16
it says he loved the world. not just the straights, not just the white people, not just the people named biblically. none of that. it says he LOVED THE WORLD. that includes everyone, no matter what they’ve done. even if people choose not to believe in him, he doesn’t hate them. he still loves them and he still died for them. that doesn’t sound like hatred to me in the slightest. also going to add these:
“He made him who knew no sin to be sin on our behalf so that we might become the righteousness of God in him.” 2 Corinthians 5:21
“Christ redeemed us from the curse of the law by becoming a curse for us.” Galatians 3:13
“For Christ also died for sins once for all, the just for the unjust, so that he might bring us to God, having been put to death in the flesh, but made alive in the spirit;” Peter 3:13
read them again and again and each time it’ll directly contradict what you said. and i could go on about the apostle Paul who used to BEAT and MURDER christians for their faith ─ he became one of the greatest followers of him AND died in his name. but i’m sure you know that story since you follow the word.
3. to treat others with kindness
treat everyone the way you would want to be treated, no matter who they are.
“Do unto others as you would have them do unto you.” Leviticus 9:18
“And if anyone would sue you and take your tunic, let him have your cloak as well. And if anyone forces you to go one mile, go with him two miles. Give to the one who begs from you, and do not refuse the one who would borrow from you. You have heard that it is said, ‘You shall love your neighbor and hate your enemy.’ But I say to you, love your enemies and pray for those who persecute you.” Matthew 5:40-43
“But I say to you who hear, love your enemies, do good to those who hate you, bless those who curse you, pray for those who abuse you.” Luke 6:27
“But love your enemies, and do good, and lend, expecting nothing in return, and your reward will be great.” Luke 6:35
“So whatever you wish that others would do to you, do also to them.” Matthew 7:12
“Love is patient and kind; love does not envy or boast; it is not arrogant or rude. It does not insist on its own way; it is not irritable or resentful; it does not rejoice at wrongdoing, but rejoices with the truth. Love bears all things, believes all things, hopes all things, endures all things.” 1 Corinthians 13:4-7
“For you were called to freedom, brothers. Only do not use your freedom as an opportunity for the flesh, but through love serve one another.” Galatians 5:13
“And let us not grow weary of doing good, for in due season we will reap, if we do not give up. So then, as we have opportunity, let us do good to everyone, and especially to those who are of the household of faith.” Galatians 6:9-10
“Be kind to one another, tenderhearted, forgiving one another, as God in Christ forgave you.” Ephesians 4:32
“Therefore encourage one another and build one another up, just as you are doing.” 1 Thessalonians 5:11
it even addresses what you said multiple times ─ it says don’t hate your enemies. it says to love them and even wish them the best.
4. that everyone is loved by him and created in his image
bringing up John 3:16 again because “For God so loved the world.” he loved everyone.
“I will praise [God] because I have been fearfully and wonderfully made.” Psalms 139:13-14
it calls people fearfully and wonderfully made. this was David, who God actually called a man after his own heart. and back to the whole died for every sin thing, David was a horrible person at one point. he slept with another man’s wife and then had the guy killed because he felt so guilty about it. he wasn’t a saint and God still called him a man after his own heart. king david is one of the best known followers of God in the bible and he did awful things. God still loved him and if he can love an adulterer and murderer, why the hell can’t he love a gay person? someone who’s just living and loving who they want?
“God created man in his own image.” Genesis 1:27
there. that one. lgbtq+ people were created in God’s image. they aren’t mistakes or sinners, they are created in his image, fearfully and wonderfully made.
5. that Sodom and Gomorrah was destroyed because of its sins
homophobes loveeee to bring up how sodom and gomorrah was destroyed for its homosexuality. but i’ve read the whole thing and it doesn’t say that was why. it mentions that there was a large homosexual population but let’s go over why it was actually destroyed and how they lost their second chance.
“Now the men of Sodom were wicked, great sinners against the LORD.” Genesis 13:13
notice how it didn’t say “the men of Sodom were gay and that was wrong.”
“But before they lay down, the men of the city, even the men of Sodom, compassed the house round, both young and old, all the people from every quarter. And they called unto Lot, and said unto him: ‘Where are the men that came in to thee this night? Bring them out unto us, that we may know them carnally.’” Genesis 19:4-5
Lot begged for God to give the city a second chance and he did, he sent two angels. this is what happened and this is the proof that they were destroyed because of their sin. not because they were gay, it was because they all banged on the door asking to get to rape these strangers. sexuality wasn’t the problem, it was their perverted and awful actions that had them long gone.
6. that people who falsely preach are dogs and antichrists
“Beloved, do not believe every spirit, but test the spirits to see whether they are from God, for many false prophets have gone out into the world. By this you know the Spirit of God: every spirit that confesses that Jesus Christ has come in the flesh is from God, and every spirit that does not confess Jesus is not from God. This is the spirit of the antichrist, which you heard was coming and now is in the world already. Little children, you are from God and have overcome them, for he who is in you is greater than he who is in the world. They are from the world; therefore they speak from the world, and the world listens to them.” John 4:1-6
“But even if we or an angel from heaven should preach to you a gospel contrary to the one we preached to you, let him be accursed.” Galatians 1:8
“Beware of false prophets, for they come to you in sheep’s clothing, but inwardly they are ravening wolves.” Matthew 7:15
“Beware of dogs, beware of evil workers, beware of the concision.” Philippians 3:2
anyone who preaches falsely ─ or in other words, says things that aren’t true like ‘God hates gays’ ─ is considered accursed, a dog, and an antichrist.
everything i said here came from the “word of God” that YOU said you follow. so sit down, anon.
quick disclaimer: i’m not attacking any atheists/any other religions by posting this. i’m just showing this anon and anyone else who believes in God what the bible says about supposedly hating gays. you have the right to believe in whatever you want to be respected.
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Why did Kepler call Eiffel his Point man that one time: An essay.
Okay here is the reason I was researching what a point man is.
So there’s this throwaway line from Kepler in ‘Persuasion’ where he says he’s “Not about to waste his point man on such a hazardous mission.” Which is incredibly interesting to me because in a military context a point man would go out first into the most hazardous situation to investigate.And, if necessary, to die so others didn’t. Kepler very much isn’t asking Eiffel to do that....Yet.
See, in the episode, he’s asking Eiffel to stay with him on the Hephaestus while everyone else goes out on the dangerous space walk. So maybe it’s just an Inception reference, or the writers didn’t research some terminology that well, and it’s not that deep? (Probably, but I also feel like over analyzing this a little bit.)
So a point man, right? Characterized by being a scout, taking tons of danger for everyone else, and also, and this part is very important, being ceaselessly loyal....... and also an Inception reference, (Creating a sort of right-hand man connotation into the bargain, if you consider the character of Arthur.) (I could write a whole other essay about the whole point man thing for him but it would get really long if I did it here.) and obviously, Eiffel would appreciate a pop culture reference.
But isn’t that role more suited to Jacobi? I would argue not. Especially after Maxwell’s death, Jacobi quickly loses faith in Kepler, in fact, he seems to blame Kepler for Maxwell’s death more than he blames Minkowski. Kepler was the one to make the orders, even if she was the one to pull the trigger. Although his loyalties to Kepler seem pretty fluid, even after Maxwell’s death he has so much faith in her, I don’t have the exact quote handy, but he says something along the lines of “People like that (Kepler) are there to let people like her (Maxwell) be brilliant.” (And presumably better humanity and all that jazz, really sweet that someone as outwardly cynical as Jacobi has such....Noble thoughts.) Even from as early as the Goddard Christmas party, they seem to back each other up on the most banal of lies. TO KEPLER, no less.
This suggests something really interesting, that Jacobi isn’t Kepler’s point man, he’s Maxwell’s. Even before her death, Jacobi’s loyalty to Kepler is always going to be secondary. And even though Kepler heavily miscalculated how much Jacobi would still be loyal to him after the mutiny, I think he does realize this on some level.
So Kepler needs a new right-hand man, one who already has proven himself to be loyal, and who goes out into danger to scout it out.
Enter.....Doug Eiffel! Who has, A: Proven himself to be extremely loyal on multiple occasions, something Kepler would have witnessed both firsthand when he first picked him up on the Urania, and through Doug’s logs. and B: Had significant experience in dangerous situations. (Again, the whole ‘cryosleep and readjust the tiny spaceship to get in comms range of help’ is something Kepler would have seen firsthand.) and C: Eiffel is viewed favorably by the aliens they’re trying to contact. All of this adds up to a very good point man, if Kepler can win him over.
Which Kepler attempts through......Drum-roll please.....Emotional manipulation!!! Is anyone really surprised? Anyway. He starts by outwardly validating the person hood of both Eiffel and Hera, mainly by yelling at Hilbert a lot, While behind the scenes he has Maxwell put malicious code in Hera and expects Eiffel to eventually die for him if it comes to that.
He also isolates Eiffel as much as possible from other members of his original team.
He assigns Minkowski the most menial jobs he can, and since turning Eiffel against her is frankly a tall order, attempts to turn her against him with the records ‘leak’ of his past.
He gives Hera a new friend who understands her on a level that Eiffel doesn’t.
He keeps Lovelace close, (My personal interpretation of their dynamic is that Kepler views her as an opposing, but largely unattached agent. No loyalty to either him or the Hephaestus crew.) as master-at-arms, but largely doesn’t seem to worry about her.
Since degradation and other forms of manipulation (punishment?) don’t seem to work on Hilbert, Kepler attacks him through the only vector he can, denying him his research. (This serves two purposes, keeping Hilbert in line and submissive, and encouraging Eiffel to like him more. I don’t think Kepler would care that much about Eiffel’s health unless it benefited him somehow, so he uses Eiffel’s bodily autonomy basically as a treat for good behavior. Not unlike how a lot of people treat Hera, actually.)
And Eiffel? He praises him for his resourcefulness, he gives him preferential treatment, doesn’t call him stupid. (This is all heavily conditional on his mood, of course.) He makes himself the one person on the station who will give Eiffel consistent support and doesn’t underestimate his ability. This is all to the point where I think if the contact event had gone to plan, even if nobody else on the original crew survived, and it was just him, Jacobi, Maxwell, and Eiffel? Well, Kepler would be just fine with that. Eiffel would go out first, attempt to communicate with the aliens, and come back, maybe short a few limbs, maybe with some additional trauma, but ultimately fine.
Because beneath all the bluster and pop-culture references, Eiffel is stunningly good at his job.
He’s good at not dying, at thinking on his feet.
He’s made first contact with aliens when no-one else in presumably hundreds of other missions has.
Because you know what they say, when you’ve got a pig that good.....
#on a first listen through it seemed obvious kepler was doing some sort of manipulation#just was never sure for what#and then two years and one viewing of inception later#everything just clicked together in lurid detail#Wolf 359#wolf 359 meta#Doug Eiffel#warren kepler
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What would you expect from the public, including minors, when torturing someone in public is done, especially when it's a public spectacle and people actually come to watch. Is liking to watch torture a thing in this case? My story is a medieval/steampunk fantasy by the way.
Well Anon, this does still happen today. It happens in the country I grew up in and consider my home. So… my first suggestion is to throw out the implication that this is a weird historical thing the world doesn’t have to deal with any more. Because it is still very real. And if you get any kind of success with your story there’s a good chance some of your readers will have experience with this.
It’s also significantly more complicated then ‘liking’ or ‘disliking’ so let’s unpack this a bit.
I’ve never actually seen anyone maimed or executed. But as a kid of around 9-10 I knew kids my age who had. We used it as a sort of… pissing contest basically. Kids would brag about it to show how hard they were, in the same way we’d stuff chilis into our mouths and see who could last longest.
It’s one of those bizarre kinds of ritualised self-harm that you end up performing in order to cope with awful things.
Because witnessing this kind of stuff is harmful, to adults and children. It can leave people traumatised and displaying some of the symptoms I write about here.
But, however old the characters, if they grew up somewhere where this is the norm then I absolutely guarantee they understand showing opposition is dangerous. They know their responses to these displays of brutality and power are used as a proxy for their loyalty and worthiness by the state.
And boy if you are in any way outside the norm, if you are queer or the ‘wrong’ ethnic group or faith, then the pressure to conform here is so much more intense.
I lived in Saudi, my home town is Dhahran. My parents are from opposite ends of Europe and they tried to raise me Christian. I still spent a lot of my teenage years unpacking stuff I’d absorbed about public executions, amputations, whippings etc.
From the kids I knew growing up (anecdotal evidence no matter how empassioned) I’d say the ‘normal’ responses to witnessing this kind of state violence are varied. Kids would get nightmares, start showing signs of mild anxiety disorders or depression. They’d become moody, angry and generally unhappy. Which they’d sometimes take out on other people.
But I can’t remember anyone ever explicitly linking it to what they witnessed. They’d try to hide this stuff. Some of them would double down on justifications for state violence (seemed pretty common.) They would, above all, deny there was a problem.
Because admitting to mental illness made you ‘weak’ and admitting to doubts about state violence made you a ‘traitor’. Which is a pretty risky thing to label yourself (even by implication) when you live in a state that publicly mutilates and murders people. (Note the author’s bias as a committed pacifist may be showing.)
As you may have noticed Anon, I still carry a significant amount of anger on this particular subject. This bottled vitriole is not directed at you or your story idea but at the states and politicians who make sure this brutality continues. It’s about the fact that I can remember a nine year old girl matter of factly talking about beheading at a birthday party.
Stepping back from the personal side of things for a moment we know from studies of PTSD and trauma survivors generally that witnessing violence can lead to lasting psychological symptoms. Including PTSD.
PTSD specifically is more likely when an individual is directly effected (ie physically hurt). But repeated exposure to traumatic events, including witnessing violence, makes the manifestation of long term symptoms more likely.
So a character that has seen dozens of these attacks is more likely to develop a long term mental health problem then a character who has seen only one. Regardless of age.
We can’t predict which individual symptoms an individual witness will develop or indeed when a witness might develop them. We just don’t know enough about how these things happen yet.
Having said that, the possible symptoms for witnesses are pretty much identical to the possible symptoms for torture survivors (link above.) I’d advise against using chronic pain for witnesses unless you have a clear idea of an underlying cause; it seems (anecdotally) to be more common in people who directly experienced violence.
If you decide to use insomnia there’s a masterpost on sleep deprivation here.
For mental health problems like depression, anxiety etc remember there are physical symptoms as well as symptoms related to mood. Characters who are trying to deny they have a mental health problem might focus overly on physical symptoms. Depression can cause nausea, vomiting and tiredness/lack of energy which might be mistaken for disease. Anxiety can cause chest pain and shakes.
Circling back let’s talk about some of the phrasing in this question for a moment. Because ‘choose to watch’ misunderstands the way states use these public displays of violence.
Attendance and witnessing of public executions and torture is often enforced. Sometimes overtly and sometimes more tacitly. Because the point of these displays is to hammer home the power of the state. That doesn’t work if people can easily choose not to go.
Here’s an example of what that overt and tacit enforcement looked like back home.
Tacit enforcement came from the timing and placement of executions and amputations. They took place on weekends, when almost everyone was off work. They were carried out in major towns and cities, where the population density was higher. The venue was typically on a main thoroughfare close to important sites. Which ensured a high volume of people would be in the area when the execution took place, whether there was due to be an execution or not.
So picture the town or city this is taking place in, in your story. When are the public holidays? Where are the markets? Where are the most popular religious venues? At what time will the most people be in these areas?
All of that will tell you where an execution or public torture is likely to take place. Because if you set this shit up in eye sight of the place most people buy food, at the time when the most people are out, you get witnesses.
Whether they want to be witnesses or not.
Overt enforcement, on the low end of the scale, means having officials among the crowd pushing people towards the scaffold. At home this seemed to be targetted towards children and people who were judged as ‘other’. Different races to the majority, people who might have been read as a different religion, people who might have been read as queer etc.
This is because the message is ‘This could be you.’
I know practices in other countries have sometimes gone beyond this. Police or armed officials will sometimes go out and gather a crowd of witnesses by just… approaching people on the street and demanding they attend.
This approach requires quite a bit of man power and is not practical or necessary in every setting. In most cases setting things up in the right place and time is enough to ensure a large number of witnesses.
What I’m trying to illustrate here is that a lot of people will see this stuff without having made a conscious choice to do so.
And making a conscious choice to see it… well it does say something about the character but not in the way you’re thinking.
Because these displays are all about the power of the state. Witnessing them, responding to them is performance and it’s a performance of state loyalty. You can’t expect someone to give their true opinion on public displays of violence when criticism or voicing ‘dislike’ could lead to them being targets of violence.
Basically if you’ve got characters going to see this stuff regularly then it’s worth asking why they feel the need to display their loyalty in this way. Sometimes it’s because they really really believe in the state. But often… they’re compensating for something.
Wrapping up I think it’s important to note there’s often a difference between what people say about this stuff versus what they actually feel. And that’s because these things are explicitly political and explicitly about the power a state has over it’s subjects.
The way individuals respond to these things in public and what they say about them in public effects how they are treated. Sometimes it comes with obvious legal sanctions. Even if it doesn’t… these displays are entirely about reminding people the state can kill them.
And it doesn’t actually discourage crime or civil disobedience but it does create a climate of fear and hostility which permeates daily life.
Think about why the state is insecure about their power. Think about how your characters live with that background radiation and whether it feeds into cultural ideas around things like martyrdom or nobility of suffering.
Remember that there is a difference between public and private life. Existing in these kinds of brutal states often means having quite a sharp distinction between them. This can create very strong bonds to those the characters trust. It can also create a big difference between private and public personas.
If you’re writing a world where public torture and executions are happening there’s more going on then just individual character’s reactions. You are saying something about the world, the ruling class and the politics of the area.
Take the time make sure you know what you want to say.
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#writing advice#tw torture#tw mutilation#tw racism#tw police brutality#execution#torture as execution#effects of torture on the public#public torture#public execution#writing torture#writing witnesses#writing symptoms#effects of torture#effects of torture on witnesses
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i love all of your hera takes so much; can you say more about the relationship she has with each crew member? (or just eiffel to be honest, im kind of a sucker for them ^^;)
I would love to! I'm sorry this answer is so long and also... all over the place, but in my defense it's a really broad topic that I have a lot of feelings about and this barely even scratches the surface.
Okay. I've thought a lot about how I wanted to approach this, and I think the first thing I want to say - and I know this might seem like a strange point to open on, but I think it's a key factor in all of these relationships - is that I think Hera experiences rejection sensitive dysphoria, and I think the way that manifests for her is kind of the opposite of how Eiffel experiences RSD. They both have a deep-seated feeling of inadequacy and any criticism can feel like a personal attack, like everyone else is blaming them for everything that goes wrong. But where Eiffel internalizes that feeling and also blames himself/gets angry with himself, Hera lashes out and deflects. This is complicated by protocols that restrict her behavior, especially early on, because she can't always properly express herself and she builds resentment. She's really good at holding grudges.
So. With Lovelace, I think it's pretty obvious where that initial conflict is. Hera doesn't understand where Lovelace is coming from, and it's made worse from her perspective because Lovelace should understand, better than anyone, what that loss of control, that sense of powerlessness and insignificance in your own life, feels like. They are both traumatized people, but they deal with it differently. They approach conflict differently - they can both be blunt, but I think Lovelace is the kind of person who can start to deal with and move past things once they're out in the open, while Hera will get in a fight and then stew over it forever. It sounds kind of ridiculous to say when so much of their early relationship with each other is... what it is, but I think Eiffel and Minkowski are both peacekeepers in their own ways, and the Hera-Lovelace dynamic suffers from the lack of that... tempering influence.
(And I think it's notable that Hera’s confrontation with Lovelace in Pan-Pan is among her worst memories.)
On the other hand, I think that shared bluntness can be useful sometimes - in Do No Harm, most of all, but also in Shut Up and Listen. Hera was definitely still holding onto hurt from some of the things Eiffel used to say, but by that point... without Lovelace, I'm really not sure if she ever would've brought it up to him.
And, of course, Hera becomes much more protective of (and willing to understand) Lovelace once they have... some even more similar experiences, in S4. I guess my general assessment of their relationship is that they care about each other and they will advocate for each other, especially where they share difficult and traumatic experiences and on issues of identity, but I don't think they're ever that close. They're kind of... the two people in the friend group who don't quite know how to hang out without their other friends.
Hera's initial conflict with Minkowski has some similar roots, but it's... not quite the same. There are times where Lovelace will intentionally prod at Hera's insecurities; Minkowski doesn't do it on purpose. She's just under the impression that her criticism is fair and professional, while to Hera it feels deeply personal, like it's an assessment of her worth as an individual. Once they understand and reconcile that miscommunication, there's a lot of trust and respect between them - and I think the potential for that is there earlier, too, especially in some flashback scenes; there are just... missteps along the way. Tactical Brain Damage is the best episode to demonstrate the establishment of that trust, I think - Hera has a LOT of wariness when it comes to people messing around with her systems, and just the act of saying... I trust you to do this, I know you won't let anything happen to me... is a really, really big deal for her.
They also just... have honest conversations about their feelings and concerns by that point, and Minkowski is considerate of how Lovelace's plans affect Hera, specifically, and asks for her input on that basis. I think their dynamic is really underutilized, but the way they feel about each other is clear. Minkowski is the only person other than Eiffel that Hera really trusts, and her only other close friend. There's definitely... a part of that dynamic that only Eiffel can offer, and that they can't really make up for when he's gone, but there's still this sense that... they're the only two people who are still really talking to each other by the time Pan-Pan comes around.
(Side note, it's really funny that Hera was SO on board to be in Minkowski's musical. Minkowski gave her only willing participant a minor part. If I could wish one non-Eiffel-centric comedy mini-episode into existence... at one point, my friend suggested a scenario in which Hera tries very, very hard to prove her acting skills to Minkowski under the most inopportune circumstances. ... And Hera was interested to hear Minkowski talk about a play she likes in that one flashback, so. The only thing keeping Hera from being a fellow theater kid was a lack of opportunity. Maybe they could bond over it.)
There's also that scene in Quiet, Please where Minkowski very directly, emphatically defends Hera's autonomy and personhood to Jacobi - and refers to her as a woman, which I think is so... reflective of how much Minkowski has come to understand Hera and what's important to her, and how she wants to be seen. That's a whole other discussion that goes into Hera's self-perception and humanity as it relates to her own identity, but. For a number of reasons, it's important to me.
Anyway. Speaking of things that are important to me. Hera and Eiffel are... Hera and Eiffel. Hera's relationship to Eiffel is the first one she's ever had that comes without hierarchy or conditions; he just... wants to hang out with her, and to get to know her, and to talk to her, because he likes her as a person. She's never had that before, and she is such... a lonely person, a person who has been hurt, who is generally distrustful, who has this distance between her and everyone else, and Eiffel is her anchor to the world. He tries to understand her. He tries to bridge that gap. And even in all of his own missteps, I think just... knowing he cares to try matters so much. I think a lot about how Eiffel is the only one who physically crosses the stage to talk to Hera in the live show; it says... something about the way he sees her, compared to everyone else.
And there's just... the way that they're both... people with a lot of self-doubt, people who have a hard time being kind to themselves, but they're kind to each other, and patient with each other. There's something about recognizing your own flaws in someone you love and treating them with kindness so maybe, over time, you can extend that same compassion to yourself. I want to be the person you believe I am. Going back to that shared experience with RSD, I think it's really valuable for both of them to have someone in their lives who they can really, genuinely believe likes them as they are. Who won't think less of them, no matter what.
I know I can get kind of sentimental about them, but this is what stands out to me. That even when Hera is frustrated or annoyed with Eiffel, when she feels like he doesn't get it, can't understand what she's going through... she still wants him around. And she still talks to him. And, usually... she still feels better, even if the circumstances haven't changed. It's an unbearable situation, but it's a little less unbearable with him there.
(They're also... frequently the only people who can get through to each other/change each other's minds, i.e. Minkowski and Lovelace deferring to Hera to get Eiffel to agree to safety protocols, or Eiffel convincing Hera to vote to go back to Earth - also a totally different topic that would take a long time to get into properly, but he's good at kind of... emotionally counteracting her cynicism and defeatism re: her own perceived fate. In a less serious context, I also love the dynamic where she tells him she's not going to do something and he goes "please??" and she goes. Ughh. Fine. And does it anyway.)
There's just something so special about their relationship, something that makes it different from any other relationship in the show for me. I feel like... Eiffel and Minkowski are both her close friends, but the way Hera thinks about Eiffel in Memoria vs. the way she thinks about Minkowski is... revealing. Everything with Minkowski has a purpose, it's clear why it matters to her. She thinks of Minkowski's faith in her. But with Eiffel, she thinks about... Eiffel talking about Star Wars. Making pop culture references. The thing that saves Hera is her connection to Eiffel and Minkowski - I'll defend that; Maxwell gives her the tools to understand what's going on, but it's Eiffel's and Minkowski's words and associated memories that she holds onto and that ultimately pull her through - and those words are... Minkowski's affirmation. And Eiffel... being Eiffel. I think that says a lot.
(If you’re asking for my opinion on their relationship, you already know I think it’s a romance, but... it’s a romance. I’m not saying it should be canon. I’m saying that that’s the most natural interpretation of what’s already there. You don’t have to change anything. They’re best friends, and they’re found family, and they are so in love, and none of those things are mutually exclusive. The way they talk to each other...)
If there's one point I want to make about all of this, it's that Hera is in a position that makes trusting people potentially very dangerous, and in all of these cases, she is finding ways to build relationships with people despite that. To understand them, and have them understand her, and realizing that the things that make her different don't have to be a death sentence. That she can have a life and find a way forward with people she cares about, who care about her... that's something very important to me.
#wolf 359#w359#hera wolf 359#asks#okay this is the last thing that i've needed to reply to for a long time so. one i'm very sorry and i hope this is coherent#despite the fact it's mostly personal rambling#and two... now i'm free to work on some of the other posts that i've been meaning to finish forever. i have problems.#if you consider him a crew member:#hera's relationship to hilbert is that hlvrai screenshot that's like 'i think it's good that he died!'#thank you to the three people who will take the time to read this. i love you
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EVERYONE, MEET YOON SEUNGHO, THE ACTUAL CAPTAIN OF THE NAKYUM PROTECTION SQUAD! In chapter 53, Seungho shows to everyone that no one can touch Nakyum but him and that he will protect him from the whole world.
So they really were Seungho's thoughts! He's been trying so hard to convince himself that Nakyum means nothing to him, even when he is marching to his room, but the moment he sees Nakyum getting hurt, all his doubts disappear. He saves him, proving how much NK means to him. It's so poignant how Seungho was trying convice himself that Nakyum means nothing to him, and then he not only proves few seconds later that he means everything to him but literally spells it out to DJ, that NK is priceless and no one is good enough to touch him but him.
In the beginning, Seungho didn't care whether he hurt Nakyum or not and felt no regret whatsoever when he did, but now, he he is aghast that he's hurt him. He's come such a long way, from a heartless bastard to a point where he would protect Nakyum even from himself.
Seungho has always been like a feral beast, who couldn't be controlled by anyone, but Nakyum tames him with his mere words and gentle touch. Seungho might be Nakyum’s sword and shield, but Nakyum is Seungho’s salvation. Nakyum might not have wealth, status or superior physical strength, but he is powerful in his own right. He merely holds a different kind of strength: HIS GENTLE HEART which is pure like a crystal.
The shock that he's hurt NK is followed by even bigger one: that despite everything Seungho's done to him this night - ignoring him, treating him like shit, screwing other men in front of hin and hitting him - Nakyum doesn't hate him and still can touch him and embrace him. When Seungho is angry, he is at his scariest and darkest self. Yet, Nakyum is brave enough to touch him, showing that he can accept SH's damaged self and heal him. Even after seeing SH at him worst and blinded by rage, NK doesn't run away from him, instead he holds him tight. Nakyum is no longer meek and submisssive. He is the Nakyum that always spoke his mind and challenged him. His spirit is finally back. It's the Nakyum that Seungho loves so much and missed so much and that's one of the reasons why NK manages to get through to SH and soothe him.
They look like as if their brains were about to explode any moment or like a couple after a doctor tells them they're expecting triplets after Min announces that Seungho is in love with Nakyum. They've been stuck in the roles that society forced upon them and to which they resigned himself that the mere idea that Seungho might be in love and Nakyum might be loved, especially, by someone like Seungho, is such a mindblow to both of them. Furthermore, the notion of being in love is so foreign to Seungho that it takes someone literally spelling it out for him to finally begin to even entertain the possibility of it.
Well, damn! It makes so much sense now why Seungho went to his usual fuck buddies in the previous chapter. He never felt jealous or hurt when his partners used to kiss or fuck someone else. He never felt like this. Until now. He needed to experience the same pain that Nakyum had felt when he kissed Min in front of him. He didn't get the concept of monogamy, why people chose to sleep only with one person for the rest of their lives. Therefore this is another lesson to him and I think that Seungho might become faithful to Nakyum. It's perfect how basically less than 10 minutes later, after he kissed Min in front of Nakyum, Seungho goes through the same heartache as Nakyum and realizes that it hurts like hell when the person he loves doesn't belong only to him. Another reason why he'll stay faithful to Nakyum is that Seungho has again and again shown that he hates seeing Nakyum getting hurt, and if him being with other men hurts Nakyum then he is never going to touch someone else ever again.
Nakyum and Seungho feel hurt after seeing the kisses,but their next reaction shows that Seungho feels the pain more deeply and is more out of control because at this point, he loves Nakyum more than Nakyum loves him. That’s one of the reasons why he’s been feeling frustrated because deep down he knows it.
Seungho has gone through such an emotional roller coaster in the span of mere 10 minutes, it's a miracle he didn't get a heart attack or a stroke! He has never openly shown such a wide spectrum of emotions like he doess in chapter 53.
Seungho didn't look at Nakyum in his room earlier because,deep down, he knew that the moment he saw him and his beautiful sad eyes he would lose all his determination and run to him; even the kiss was a way to protect him in the end. He becomes powerless in front of Nakyum, just like now. Nakyum makes his heart palpitate.
Seungho looks so young when he's shocked which is usually when Nakyum initiates intimacy. It feels as if he were gaining back the innocence he lost, given back to him by his young lover. When Seungho loses his control, his mask of ice and stone slips and his emotions and real self show.
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Only Temporary: Sebastian Tate
Hello. I was completely blown away by the positive response I got on the first piece of Jaime’s story (title under construction). Thank you to everyone who had a kind word to say about it! You made me really happy I made the mildly frightening choice to post.
In the interest of acclimating to the no-rules, freedom-to-post-out-of-order structure of this community, I wanted to introduce a new piece of the puzzle this time, with a new character that will come into play later.
Also, this piece goes into a little bit of the details, but for frame of reference on the BBU-adjacent thing: this story takes place in a not-so-distant future of the BBU, where WRU has undergone some changes. I look forward to exploring this world building more as I go.
Anyway, I’m rambling again. Thanks for reading. Here it is:
WARNINGS: General BBU warnings, talk of institutionalized slavery, classism, and general terribleness of large corporations. Referenced past homophobia and rough parental relationships, briefly implied/referenced non-con.
When Sebastian reflects on the day he graduated from med school, a sort of emptiness is the memory that first bobs to the surface. Among the cheers and camera flashes in the crowd, white coats and proud smiles, what Sebastian recalls most vividly from that day is looking out into the sea of parents and families and people there to support their loved ones on one of the biggest days of their lives, and not seeing a single person that had come for him.
What should have been one of the happiest moments of his life had been quickly overshadowed by the sinking feeling that none of it mattered as much as it would have if he had someone to share it with. Like there was something so fundamentally wrong with his life, that even something as objectively good and right and decent as becoming a doctor could be dulled over into a feeling of nothingness.
Perhaps, he thinks in hindsight, that moment had been foreshadowing for the following months ahead of him.
Watching rejection after rejection pour in from his top residency programs had felt like nothing short of his own personalized nightmare. He had spent several nights in a row on the phone with Alex, his undergrad roommate and only friend, clamoring back from the edge of many a panic attack, spiraling into all-out existential dread about the future and the past and what all of it meant for him if he couldn’t land an internship, let alone a real job out of school. To his credit, Alex never gave up hope in his friend. Or at least, he did a decent job hiding it if he did. Which was probably exactly what Sebastian needed to get through that particularly dark time in his life, and a good reminder of what a solid friend he had. Even if it was a party of two.
Unfortunately, Sebastian did not have the same faith in himself.
He was able to keep up some facade of optimism as his top five were picked off one by one. Telling himself, despite his devastation, that they were a pretty far reach, anyway. Even with good academic standing, it was famously no walk in the park to land yourself at John Hopkins or Mayo as a first-year. He even maintained a brave face as his first few safety programs reached capacity and moved forward without his name on the roster.
It wasn’t until he received his final rejection letter from some internal medicine place in Bumfuck, Idaho that he felt himself slip into dangerous territory. Sebastian knew himself well enough to know his own depressive patterns by then, and he knew it was only exponential decay from there.
Rock bottom came, as it did, in the wee hours of the night, after a full bottle of wine. Alone in his small apartment, surrounded by half-packed boxes with no destination, Sebastian found himself sprawled out on the floor with his laptop hot against his thighs. He couldn’t have explained why he opted for a privacy browser, but something about it allowed him to justify the words that he typed into the search bar.
It was a new low, and one he had sworn to himself he would never stoop to. Yet there he was.
He gave himself a moment to reconsider, to back out of what was undoubtedly a morally-gray train wreck waiting to happen as his thumb hovered over the enter key. And then the alcohol decided to override his moral compass.
Facility Care is the open secret of the medical profession. It comes with its fair share of stigma, and rightfully so, but it is notoriously easy to break into and pays a decent wage.
There are two types of people who end up stooping to that kind of employment. More often than not, it consists of doctors and nurses who had their licenses revoked or suspended somewhere along the line and needed a way back in. As far as Sebastian understood, they aren’t terribly ridgid about the particulars of each circumstance. After all, in the eyes of the law, the patients they would be treating are a price tag away from being entirely expendable.
The other percentage of Facility Care workers, and the reason Sebastian found himself staring at his too-bright computer screen with a sinking feeling of dread that night, are young medical graduates who find themselves in a tough spot. It isn’t difficult to spell out the logic behind that one when you open the WRU CAREERS tab on the home page and see the bright white words printed across the top of the screen:
LOAN FORGIVENESS.
It is shamelessly predatory and aggressively capitalistic, but Sebastian supposes that particular exploitation is pretty far down on the list of transgressions for an institution of legalized slavery. A few broke and hopeless medical students were hardly going to keep the Powers That Be up at night when they were able to rest easy under the weight of hundreds of thousands of stolen lives.
The whole thing is part of the massive PR overhaul the company did a few years back. In a world that was slowly inching toward civil activism and with the accessibility of platforms like social media to hold them accountable, WRU had to adapt to survive. Adaptation, in this case, took the form of changing the barest of minimums in order to keep themselves above board — to the public eye, anyway. Anyone who dares to take a closer look at the policy changes can see that it’s bullshit.
Changing ownership conditions to a rent-by-contract basis isn’t the humanitarian move they try to paint it as. In the end, it probably just equals out to more money in the company’s pocket when they can get more return on their “investments,” and a larger chance of exploitation for the people being moved around.
Getting rid of the Romantic division is an entirely meaningless gesture when they are still loaning out human beings with no legal rights and the inability to say “no.”
And offering an open job market with good wages and healthcare options to lower class individuals is a pretty convenient way to mute the backlash.
Essentially, you can tie a system of slavery and abuse up in a bow and make it pretty on the outside, but at the end of the day, it’s still fucking slavery.
Not that he has any room to criticize now. Now that he’s one of them.
In the end, Seb tries to justify his decision a few different ways. He is, after all, more or less a young man alone in the world. The odds are stacked against him and have been for a while. With only his own two legs to stand on, the only force stronger than his internal ambition is his instinct for survival, and he’s been running on those fumes for longer than he can count.
He had lasted less than two months under his parents’ roof after he came out of the closet at eighteen. It wasn’t exactly a surprise for anyone involved; Sebastian’s parents had known about (and subsequently bottled) his… urges… since he was in high school. Probably before that, if he is being honest with himself. And Sebastian, for his part, had spent the better part of his teenage years mentally preparing for the inevitable. He can recall long, late nights he had spent crying into his pillow and the perfectly-scripted ‘coming out’ speeches he recited to his mirror when he was one-hundred percent sure his parents were asleep.
Of course, none of the preparation had been anywhere near adequate when he actually found himself wilting beneath the heat of his father’s glare, the weight of his mother’s grief.
But. He had recovered. That is the point he tries to remember when the memories sting fresh beneath his skin, even all these years later. He has more-than proven himself to be a survivor. He has worked harder than anyone he knows for every scholarship, every grant, every dollar to put himself through school. Sacrificed nights out and real relationships for night shifts at shitty diners and long weekends cramming for exams. It hadn’t been easy, but he considers it the price he had to pay for his independence. For freedom, to live the life as the person he is meant to be, despite his unfortunate odds. He spent years telling himself it would be worth it. That one day, his hard work would pay off.
He can’t stop now.
Sebastian doesn’t have the luxury of taking time off to reroute when his navigation has gone amiss. He is walking the precarious line of rapidly accruing interest and student loans and a dwindling savings account, and there is no safety net below him.
Beggars can’t be choosers, and as it turns out, beggars sometimes have to compromise their moral integrity in order to survive.
It’s only temporary.
That is the mantra that gets him through the (half-drunken) application process and the (disturbingly lax) interview process. It is a job. One job. In the medical field, though the details are up for debate, and it is real-life money for rent and food and a savings that will hopefully be sizable enough to get him where he really wanted to be. Which is… really, anywhere else.
He can do ‘temporary.’ And perhaps, some misguided part of him thinks he can do some genuine good from the inside, too. ‘Be the change you want to see’ and all that.
It is a far jump from the floor of his apartment, sloshed and exhausted and desperate, to the cold, sharp reality of walking into his place of employment on his first day of work. Ironically, it feels a lot like an echo of the emptiness from his graduation day.
‘Sterile’ doesn’t quite cover it. ‘Sterile’ is the expectation of any well-respected medical establishment, but the inside of the facility walls has been wiped clean of far more than bacteria and germs. It is completely devoid of humanity. The long corridors that connect the medical wing to the general ward are windowless and dimly lit by flickering fluorescent panels that had make his head pound for the entirety of his first week.
He is given an office, though it is a term he, himself, might use loosely, as it is more akin to what was probably a storage closet before the old prison had been converted into the state’s training headquarters. It leaves him just enough space for a small desk and two chairs. On his first day, he asks if it is okay to bring in some personal items to spruce the place up. The older, balding doctor who had been assigned to show him around merely shrugs, and Sebastian decides to take that as a yes.
The small, pink-framed photo of a six-year-old Sebastian Tate in his grandfather’s white coat and an old-school stethoscope around his neck is hardly enough to make the place cozy from the corner of his desk, but it’s a good enough reminder of why he has to make this work.
‘It’s only temporary.’
‘Be the change you want to see.’
He will do his best.
#Sebastian Tate#bbu#like bbu adjacent?#tw: human trafficking#tw: slavery#implied noncon#whump#Do No Harm: Jaime & Sebastian
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Could I request the fluff alphabet for Kiibo? (Also your writing is really good! I loved your Shuichi alphabet post! 💕)
Thank you! I was nervous to post it because I’ve never written for Shuichi before (or Keebo) so I was worried it would be bad XD but I think it turned out okay! Hope you like this, and thank you for requesting!
A-Activities (what do they like to do with their s/o? How do they spend their free time with them?)
He likes to have downtime with you. Watching movies, getting fast food, etc. He also won’t turn down playing video games with you. His secret pleasure is open world adventure games! Play skyrim with him...just do it.
B-Beauty (what do they admire about their s/o? What do they think is beautiful about them?)
Keebo values open-mindedness. Not everyone would date a robot, so if you treated him like any other person it would melt his mechanical heart. Keebo doesn’t care about looks, you can be short, tall, long hair, short hair, he is a pansexual icon.
C-Comfort (how would they help their s/o when they feel down/have a panic attack/etc.?)
He would immediately google how to make someone feel better and do his best to help. He’s never had a panic attack before, and he hasn’t been depressed so he has no firsthand experience with dealing with someone who does have depressive episodes or panic attacks. He’ll whisper to you comforting words and tell you how much he loves you. To try and help you feel better, he’d give you 100 compliments and say all of the things he loves about you (it’s everything).
D-Dreams (how do they picture their future with their s/o?)
He likes to think about his future with you, it brings him a lot of happiness. He wants a house, and wants you to stay in his future as long as possible. He’s extremely committed so once you’re with him he plans to do everything in his power to keep you in his life. He loves you, and he may not always be the best about showing it, but he’ll do his best to paint a picture of your futures together. Whatever you want in the future, he’ll make sure to achieve it for you.
E-Equal (are they the dominant one in their relationship or are they more passive?)
Keebo is in the middle, not particularly dominant but not exactly submissive either. It depends on his mood, sometimes he likes to take the reins but other times he’d prefer if you took control.
F-Fight (would they be easy to forgive their s/o? How are they fighting?)
He would be quick to forgive you for any fights you do get in. But he hates conflict, so fights are few and far between. He’d rather you talk out your differences and try not to get angry over things you do or say.
G-Gratitude (How grateful are they in general? Are they aware of what their s/o is doing for them?)
At first, he doesn’t really understand relationships. But you showed him a whole new world, and for that he’s eternally grateful. He may ask questions about what he should or shouldn’t do, and he always respects your boundaries. He shows his gratitude through words, since he’s not the biggest on physical contact.
H-Honesty (do they have secrets they hide from their s/o? Or do they share everything?)
Keebo is an open book when it comes to you. He’ll tell you anything and everything, ranging from what he did that day to his deepest thoughts. He wants a partner who can tell him everything just like he tells you, and he believes honesty is one of the most important qualities there is.
I-Inspiration (Did their s/o change them somehow, or the other way around? Like trying out new things or helped them overcome personal problems?)
You changed him on every level, because of you he’s more understanding about the world. You showed him what love is, and opened up endless possibilities for the future.
J-Jealousy (do they get jealous easily? How do they deal with it?)
He won’t admit it, but he can get pretty jealous. He doesn’t express it much, but you’ll know he’s jealous if he gives you more physical contact than usual. He’ll hold you hand and take you away from situations he thinks could be dangerous. (And in his mind talking to strangers can be dangerous, you never know what they do in their spare time or if they have the intent to hurt you.)
K-Kiss (are they a good kisser? What was the first kiss like?)
He may not be the best kisser, but he makes up for it with enthusiasm. Your first kiss he was red as can be, but he had the desire to try it. He’d never kissed anyone before you, so he doesn’t have much experience. But once the first kiss is over the second...and third...and tenth kiss followed soon after. In a way, he becomes addicted to it. He kisses you every chance he gets.
L-Love confession (how would they confess to their s/o?)
Chances are, you would have to be friends before he asked you out. He needs a solid foundation before jumping into the deep end. He’d watched a hundred youtube videos of the best way to ask someone out and apply them when he does ask you out. He was nervous, because he’d heard of the “friendzone” and didn’t want to ruin your friendship. But he would work up the courage to ask you out over time. He was very nervous...but when you said yes? It’s the happiest he’s been in his life.
M-Marriage (do they want to get married? How do they propose? What would the marriage be like?)
Keebo desperately wants to get married, but he’ll wait until you both feel ready to do so. He doesn’t want to rush it, and relishes in the time he gets to spend with you. Once you're married, he becomes a lot more physically affectionate. And he will cuddle with you for hours whispering “mine” to you with a huge smile on his face.
N-Nicknames (what do they call their s/o?)
He isn’t big on nicknames, so hearing them is rare. But occasionally he’ll call you love. He prefers your name though, and uses it often. He thinks names are special, and he absolutely loves to say your name.
O-On cloud nine (what are they like when they are in love? Is it obvious to others? How do they express their feelings?)
When he’s in love it’s extremely obvious. Mostly because he won’t let go of your hand. You’re attached near constantly. He never thought he would like physical affection, but once he’s in love he can’t get enough of it.
P-PDA (are they upfront about their relationship? Do they brag with their s/o in front of others? Or are they rather shy to kiss etc. when others are watching?)
He won’t be big on PDA at first, but once you’re in love it’s near constant. He’s always holding your hand, and if he thinks someone is looking at you he may get jealous and kiss you in front of them. Just to let them know you’re taken.
Q-Quirk (some random ability they have that’s beneficial in a relationship?)
His enthusiasm makes the relationship stay interesting. He’s willing to try anything for you, be it a new food place or something more romantic. He’s new to relationships, but he always seems enthusiastic to try something new. Especially if he knows you really like it.
R-Romance (how romantic are they? What would they do to make their s/o happy? Cliche or rather creative?)
He’d do anything...anything to make you happy. He can be pretty cliche, romantic candlelit dinners or walks on the beach, but if it makes you happy he’d do it over and over again. His happiness is secondary to yours in his eyes. So even if you try something he doesn’t like he’d do it again as long as you were happy.
S-Support (are they helping their s/o achieve their goals? Do they believe in them?)
He has all the faith in the world for you. Whatever you decided you wanted to do with your life he’s your number 1 fan. He’ll help you whenever you need it, and wants nothing more than to see you achieve your dreams.
T-Thrill (do they need to try out new things to spice up their relationship? Or do they prefer a certain routine?)
Again...he’s trying anything for you. He doesn’t care if you stay safe and enjoy the simple pleasures, but if you want to try something new he’s always open to it.
U-Understanding (how good do they know their partner? Are they empathetic?)
He makes it his goal to learn everything about you. He loves you, and wants to know everything there is to know.
V-Value (how important is the relationship to them? What’s it worth in comparison to other things in their life?)
Your love means the world to him. You become his priority rather quickly, and once you’re in love there isn’t anything he wouldn’t do so you stay with him. If you broke up with him...his world would shatter. He places you as his number 1 priority.
W-Wild Card (a random fluff headcanon)
Hand holding is his favorite thing in the world. At first he was reluctant, and couldn’t see what all the hype was about, but after he tried it he was hooked. He loves that he can show you he cares by doing something as simple as holding hands.
X-Xoxo (are they very affectionate? Do they love to kiss and cuddle?)
In public he keeps it simple, hand holding here and a few kisses there, but as soon as you’re in private he loves to give you more intimate kisses and is always ready to cuddle. Big spoon, little spoon, one on top of the other, he doesn’t care. He just wants contact.
Y-Yearning (how will they cope when they’re missing their partner?)
When he misses you he calls you...a lot. He just needs to hear your voice. It soothes him in a way. For him-leave him voicemails (on the rare occasion he doesn’t answer) and he’ll go back and listen to them when he misses you.
Z-Zeal (are they willing to go to great lengths for their relationship? If so, what kind of?)
He’d move mountains for you, if you need anything just ask him and he’ll provide it for you. You’re hungry? He’s already ordered you food. Your back hurts? He’s ready to give you a massage. You want to cuddle? He’s on it. Anything for you.
#keebo x reader#kiibo x reader#k1-b0 x reader#keebo#kiibo#k1-b0#danganronpa#danganronpa 3#danganronpa x reader#x reader#danganronpa 3 x reader
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Thinking today about viruses, allergies, oppression, and anti culture.
(under a cut because WHOOOPS this got long)
Racism is a virus. Homophobia, transphobia, sexism, antisemitism, ableism, etc etc etc, they are all viruses--a topic that many of us have learned a great deal about in the past year. They are ideas, yes, not literal physical diseases, but the analogy holds up. They are infectious, and often spread from person to person without anyone involved realizing they have it. They can sit latent for years, never showing up because the carrier never finds themselves in a situation where the issue comes up, only to flare up and take over when you least expect it. And they mutate, just like the flu, just like the common cold; they put on a new jacket every year and slide in undetected yet again, slip past our internal sensors and bury themselves in our brains until we go in and deal with them as best as we can.
One more thing we've learned about viruses this year is how we can fight them. The viruses of oppression are a little different because they tend to hurt the people around their carriers even more than the people they've infected (although let's talk about internalized anything-ism sometime), but in a lot of ways the attack is the same. You treat the symptoms even when you don't know how to cure the disease: we invest in respirators, antiviral treatments, hospitals; we create and sponsor programs to help those who've been hurt by various oppressions, we uplift our neighbors, we try to keep people safe from violences both big and small. You work to stop the spread: we wear our goddamn masks, we stay home when we can; we train ourselves not to say racist shit that might foster a culture of hate, we stop that guy in our office from making rape jokes, we make slurs unacceptable. You pay attention to your immune system: we seek medical attention when we experience symptoms, we get COVID tests, we talk to our doctors before the symptoms get deadly; we protest and we pay attention to the people who do, we take them seriously when they tell us that something is wrong.
You vaccinate. We train ourselves and our immune systems to recognize the thing that infects us, the thing that we fear. We try to teach our children about history, bit by little bit, on fragments of dead violence the same way we train our bodies on dead virus shells, so that someday they'll recognize the live disease when they see it. We learn about slavery and Jim Crow and the Holocaust. We tell kids bedtime stories about why hitting and bullying is bad, before we ever start teaching them the specific shapes that violence so often takes. As we get older, as we get stronger, we learn about the living stuff, all the new forms that same old virus has mutated into; we educate ourselves, we listen, we read. Just like vaccines, of course, there are anti-vaxxers and denialists shouting about how racism and sexism are already dead and they don't need any propoganda besides Fox News. Hell, just like anti-maskers, there are plenty of people screaming about how political correctness is ruining the world and they demand their right to spread their virus to anyone they can. Often these are the same people.
But we try. And make no mistake, we all of us are already infected, and just like a real virus, once you've caught it once it probably won't ever go away again--but we can prepare, and we can try to lessen the severity of our cases, and we can support our immune systems of activists and protesters and our own internal sense of this is wrong, and we can work, bit by bit, if not towards eradication (not yet, not in this world, but maybe someday in another), then at least towards control.
And then there's allergies.
An allergy is what happens when a human body's own immune system freaks out over an enemy that wasn't particularly harmful in the first place. All our immune defenses--those precious immune defenses, which work so hard to protect us against all those viral, deadly ideas--go screaming into high gear. All of that fear and fury and attack power gets brought to bear all at once, against a bit of pollen or bee venom or cat dander or peanuts, and your body is left itchy and runny-nosed and gasping--sometimes literally--as it tries to keep up. Allergies are miserable. Sometimes they're life-threatening. And the biggest danger isn't the foreign agent that triggers the allergic reaction; it's the immune system trying to fight it in the first place.
Which, yes, brings us to anti culture--but not JUST anti culture. It's a good example, a little internet-centric microcosm of the same force that drives progressives to tear bloody shreds out of moderate liberal politicians. Hell, it's the same force that enables both TERFs and the Capitol rioters. It's a combination of an immune system that points in the wrong direction, flagging the wrong thing as bad, terrifying, danger, NO, and a freaked-out response that can manifest as anything from mildly irritating to absolutely deadly.
To be clear, I am not by any means equating the scale or even the source of these things, any more than hayfever is the same as anaphylactic shock. Likewise, the sources are different. Sometimes, a disease can infect an immune system and point it in the wrong direction. (Terror of the other is the absolute cornerstone of white nationalism, and when that terror gets triggered by a harmless environmental condition like, god forbid, other people asking for rights, the allergy response can be deadly.) Other times, it's the other way around. Our internal immune systems, so well trained to protect ourselves and those around us from the insidious viral ravages of prejudice and oppression, start seeing traces of it everywhere.
And they freak out. And we suffer for it.
We talk a lot of well-deserved shit about TERFs, but it's useful to remember how much their nastiness feels to them like activism. Their immune system, trained and primed and sensitized over years of exposure to misogyny and sexism, catches the tiniest whiff of something that might seem at some point to have possibly been taken for male, and freaks out, because why is that trying to get into our system. Never mind that they're wrong. An immune system that flips out over penicillin is wrong, too. It's still trying to help, and it's still doing more harm than good trying it.
So bringing this back around to anti culture, which was absolutely where I started thinking about all of this this morning: anti culture, the terror of porn and the attempt by antis to protect themselves an other people from sexual content, is an immune response. It is a trained immune response, in people who have been taught and re-taught again and again that rape culture is a dangerous insidious virus that should be fought at all costs. And, right, there's more than a bit of 'the sexism virus infected this immune system and reprogrammed it to fight itself' involved here, but look, we are all of us infected with all of the viruses at least a little bit everywhere. If we tried to direct our immune systems to rip every last shred of -ism out of every last bit of us, we'd rip ourselves apart. Which is exactly the problem.
Porn, in and of itself, is natural. As natural as environmental pollen, and living near dogs and cats, and eating wheat or nuts or citrus fruit. It's even healthy, for a whole host of reasons that belong in another essay. And citric acid and nut-based proteins and whole grains are nutritious, and pets are physically and psychologically helpful, and being exposed to lots of different environmental substances as a child can actually help train your immune system in the first place. Porn can help us figure out what we like. It can help us figure out what we don't like. And while the processes that create it are sometimes unethical and awful, we don't condemn all dogs because puppy mills and dogfighting rings exist, even if we do have dog allergies.
What we see in anti culture is often a good-faith attempt on the part of antis to attack and subdue an environmental trigger that they read as dangerous. It's a panic attack over something that is by nature harmless or mildly harmful, blown out of proportion by the very instincts that are supposed to keep us safe. It's the response of an immune system that's been taught over years and years, by everyone from parents to school systems to the activists they look up to, that negative stimulus is to be feared, avoided, and fought. Of COURSE they're going to freak out.
And of course, early exposure to controlled amounts of allergens can help prevent later allergies from developing. Of course when kids are raised with abstinence-only education, sheltered from the very concept of sex, they're going to grow up allergic to it. (Of course they're going to try to protect other kids from the same, like worried mothers who refuse to let peanuts or wheat products or dirt near their precious babies, whose kids grow up with a whole suite of allergic triggers because their bodies never learned what was okay in the first place.) And no, that doesn't mean we hand pornography to ten-year-olds any more than we should give raw honey to an infant--but of course if our culture refuses to introduce kids to the fact that sex and desire and the inside of their own brain can be messy and silly and kinky and downright weird, we're going to have a higher rate of allergic reaction to the entire concept in adults.
I wish I had a better answer for what to do with understanding that this is what's going through so many people's brains. The best I have is a prescription for allergy-sufferers, who probably haven't read this far through this wordspew of an essay in the first place--but we all get a little hayfever once in a while, and we all sometimes run into content that makes us angry. So some thoughts on how to deal with metaphorical allergic reactions, inspired by the ways we deal with literal ones?
First: we recognize that what is happening is an allergy. The thing we're reacting to might be gross, or irritating, or even unpleasant, but the danger is not and never has been the thing itself. Whether it's triggering a response because of its similarity to an actively dangerous pathogen, or our immune system just doesn't like it, our aversion to one kind of story or another universally says more about us than about it. Luckily, we have a lot more control over our social responses than our biological ones!!! If vocal activism is our sociocultural immune system firing itself up to fight an infection that may or may not exist, then we get to tell our metaphorical white blood cells to stand down. We get to decide.
Second: we get some space. The funny thing about allergies is, while early exposure to allergens can help prevent them, re-exposing yourself to dangerous allergens after you've already developed a reaction to them can make them worse. Anaphylaxis is always more likely after someone's experienced it the first time. Repeated exposure to triggers, whether biological or psychological, can make the effects worse. So stop exposing yourself.
If something makes your throat itch every time you eat it, stop eating it. If something makes you mad every time you read it, stop reading it. Obviously this can be easier said than done in a world that's a lot worse about warning labels on stories than ingredients labels on foods, but that's why fic tags exist. And: sometimes, the croissant is delicious enough that we decide we're willing to suffer through the way the almonds make us feel, just this once. Sometimes the ship or the characterization or, hell, those other kinks that we really like are tasty enough that we'll put up with the trope we hate. We're allowed to do that. But we do it knowing there will be consequences, and we don't blame the baker when they hit.
We also don't have to blame ourselves. It sucks to be allergic to shellfish when all your friends are raving about the new seafood place. But that's not our fault any more than it's theirs.
Third: sometimes, if we need one, we go to the doctor. Or a therapist. Yes, really.
Not because there's anything really wrong with an aversion or even mild breakouts of hives, annoyance, and bitching in your friends' DMs--but it sure isn't pleasant, and sometimes your doctor might have a better solution than 'avoid it and take a Benadryl' that makes you feel a little better in the long run. And sometimes, it's not a mild breakout. Sometimes it's the kind of story that lingers with you for days, makes your skin crawl; sometimes your throat swells up and it gets hard to breathe. Sometimes we get angry enough about something we've read that we can't stand down our immune system, don't want to stop ourselves from writing that angry comment, that tumblr post, that abuse report to the mods for something that didn't actually break any rules. And that's dangerous, because when our immune response can flare out of control like that, we don't always know where and when it will happen next, and the risk of what we'll do if it happens gets way, way higher.
Sometimes it really is worth getting a second opinion. Sometimes you need somebody to tell you, "actually, it is not normal to get tingly and sweaty every time you eat potatoes." There are ways to train your brain and leash your white blood cells that I sure as heck am not expert enough to address. There are, it turns out, ways to feel better. There are ways to mitigate the damage your own well-meaning defense mechanisms might do to yourself or other people along the way.
And: we can take a deep breath when someone with an allergy to something we've baked, something we've written, something we like, is lashing out trying to protect themselves and everyone around them from something they've registered as a threat. Of course they're wrong. Yes, we told them there were tree nuts in the brownies ahead of time; yes, they chose to eat them anyway. But it can be worth reminding them and ourselves that there's a difference between "this thing is toxic" and "this harmless thing has driven my own system into a defensive response that sure makes it feel like I've been poisoned." And it can be worth reminding ourselves as well as them that sometimes, that difference can be really hard to spot.
#driveby meta attack#I guess#whoops I essay'ed#this was not meant to get this long#welp#anti discourse day
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At the beginning of age of avengers, someone assumes that Tony is the leader and he corrects them and say that it’s Steve.
And that surprised me because I assumed that Steve and Tony were co-leaders, but no, Steve was CHOSEN as the leader of the avengers. I was about to say that Tony was second in command, but I’m assuming that’s Nat.
But, as surprised as I was about this revelation (I literally hadn’t seen the movie in 8 years until 3 days ago), it instantly made sense.
As much as the anti Steve crowd hates on Steve, on several occasions we’ve seen Steve not only inspire people, but also get them to follow him. After someone commits to following Steve, they’re typically loyal to him.
We do not see this with Tony.
The issue with Tony isn’t that he’s flawed and has trauma, it’s how he treats others and how he processes trauma. When you lash out at others, ignore them, insult them (for your own amusement); don’t consider anyone else, etc, you more times than not will alienate people who are ok your side or, at least, want to be. A person having trauma doesn’t excuse how they treat others. And there is only so long most will people up with that behavior before leaving, which is their right.
I believe the only person who stayed by Tony’s side no matter what was Happy. Tony and Rhodey commonly fought and Rhodey even sided against Tony as well. Pepper had to take a break from Tony due to his own actions.
People can forgive flaws, but often struggle to forgive habitual poor behavior and various transgressions that comes with it.
We cannot except people to respect Tony or want to follow when he makes a joke about the PTSD (Capsickle), their traditional clothes (Thor), job endangerment (Rhodey; Tony made a transphobic joke about an event that didn’t happen), as well as sexual remarks (Natasha). And that’s not all that he did. This goes beyond being flaws, especially when you’re supposed to work with these people and they’re allegedly your friends.
He also doesn’t tell anyone about his trauma and OFTEN deflects, which may include insults or cracking inappropriate jokes. No one should have to deal with that all because someone is traumatized, especially as ALL OF THEM are dealing with their own and equally valid trauma.
Comparatively, Steve does not do that.
The people who work with Steve and are friends with him take him seriously. They support him and he supports them.
We see this going back to the 1940s. Peggy believed in Steve based off of his resilience and faith of convictions. She challenges him when he accepts his current circumstances.
After Steve saves literally over 400 men by himself, he earns the respect of not only colonel Phillips, but the men he saved as well. When he says he wants to pick his own team, in addition to the wish being respected, the chosen men flat out say that they’d follow Cap anywhere.
This must be stressed: these men were held prisoner and knew they’d encounter the most dangerous weapon and men in the entire war and readily agreed because Captain America asked.
In winter soldier, Steve is declared a criminal and is on the run. When he breaks into the shield headquarters, he gives his speech and EVERYONE minus hydra agents refuse to launch the coded because Captain America explain to them that some dangerous shit was going down. They believed his word because his actions and his character is THAT respected.
See the trend here: people listening and following Steve because they believe he’s genuine and wants to do what’s right.
In age of ultron, we hear a reference that he was chosen as leader. The events in this movie proves why Steve was chosen and Tony wasn’t.
Whether or not you believe Tony was right to crested ultron, he still should’ve told his team what Wanda made him see AND explained why he wanted to create this tech/weapon. Instead, he deliberately kept it a secret and pressured Bruce into helping him. Ironically, despite the claims that Steve feels like he knows that’s best, this is exactly what Tony assumes.
Let’s be clear: not only are Steve, nat, Bruce, hawk eye, and Thor adults, they are also avengers as well. They don’t need Tony to protect them and they all of the capabilities of deciding if they want to do something dangerous and risk their lives. And it’s ego centric as hell for him to actually believe that Steve, of all people, would guilt him by saying he should’ve saved them. Steve wouldn’t have done such a thing both saying that or even making Tony feel bad if he did all he could do.
Despite creating his murder bot due to not consulting his team because he knew they’d say no, Tony did it AGAIN.
Again, where’s the leadership? Where’s the accountability? Where’s the understanding that he may not like the answer, but he does owe it to his team to talk to them? And, again, he thinks he knows what’s best.
What does Steve do in this same movie? The twins start fighting besides him, which he doesn’t interfere with because ultron is the bigger threat. But, rather than fight them like his instinct tells them, he stop and listens to what they have to say.
I want to note that people like to say (and some are thinking), it’s good that Tony built what eventually became ultron, well, it’s good that Steve extended a hand to the twins. They also played a huge role in why the world didn’t lose half its popular, which was a consequence of Steve’s decision making.
Once Steve heard them out and was willing to let them into the fold, he defended them when other avengers tried to attack them. He didn’t leave them out to dry.
Then, when the actual fight happens Tony reveals a few minutes in that they have no other options but to abandon civilians and let them die.
Steve flat out refuses that as an option and makes the PERSONAL decision to stay until every civilian is safe. Not one person will be left to die.
I don’t know about anyone else, but Steve comes off as the clear leader and Tony doesn’t.
What happens next is that literally every current avenger and the twins stay to help. Nat literally tells Steve that this would be a beautiful place to die and explicitly says she’s fighting alongside him.
Whether or not Steve spoke to people, he inspired them to follow him by his actions.
Who is inspired to follow Tony?
Tony flirts with retirement, which no criticism against that.
But, alongside nat, Steve personally trains Sam, Rhodey, and Wanda for team avengers. After accepting Wanda into the fold, he treats her life everyone else.
In civil war, Steve was hands on with wandas training so she could control her power and made sure was protected. He accepted responsibility for not accounting for unforeseen threats, such as the explosives and explained to Wanda the realities of their job. He was realistic with her, but used that as motivation as to why they should strive to be better. Steve was outraged when he found out that she was locked up and freed her from Tony’s unlawful imprisonment.
Even if someone argues she should be locked up, Tony did not talk to her. Wanda didn’t consent to being confined to the house. This is another example of believing he knew what was best for people rather than talking to them and seeing how they feel. He isn’t giving others the right to make informed decisions for themselves and in general.
Steve, on the other hand, consistently considers what people feel because he TALKS to people. He has meaningful conversations with people, such as nat and Sam. Steve formed connections to people, which made them feel close to him.
But, let’s circle back to Tony, he takes a MINOR without the explicit consent of his guardian. Not only does he take Peter without May’s permission, he takes Peter OVERSEAS and to fight at that.
To make matters worse, Peter doesn’t know WHY he’s fighting or what for.
Where’s the oversight or accountability in any of that?
During the fight, someone flat out asks how old Peter is. Tony follows up after the fight, during homecoming, with almost inviting Peter to stay at the avengers compound. As a reminder, Peter was still a literal teenager and Tony still DID NOT ask peter’s guardian if this was okay.
Where as Steve explicitly tells people what they are getting into. He lays out what to expect and that you have a choice in it. Steve never pressures people into helping him and they usually volunteer. And, whatever happens afterwards, he’s there for them.
How was Tony’s mentorship with Peter?
He’s not actively involved with Peter after taking him in as a mentee, pawns him off in Happy, thinks at status reports are sufficient, and ignored Peter’s concerns. Peter was a minor who just had the most surreal experience of his life and Tony doesn’t think this kid would be amped and itching to do more?
Tony doesn’t think Peter might need some hands on mentorship? Tony thought he could mentor from afar with updates and camera footage, but it actually engage.
Them damned accords!
Tony signed the document due to guilt and tried to get others to sign it despite him being mostly responsible for why the accord even exist or, at least, did a lot of shit that is now being penalized. I’m not sure if he actually read it OR if someone summarized the point.
Whereas Steve DID read the accords and his stance wasn’t one of guilt, but concern and ethical issues with what’s in the accords. Steve was prepared to retire because his beliefs didn’t align with what was being asked of him and others. He didn’t ask anyone to back or follow him.
But, people do eventually back him and follow his lead. They know exactly what they’re getting into. And, despite knowing the risks and eventually getting arrested, they stick to their convictions.
When Tony finds out that Bucky killed his parents, despite knowing that Bucky was brainwashed for LITERALLY decades, he tries to kill him. When cap realizes this, he constantly tries to neutralize Tony.
Let’s go back. Steve knowing that Bucky needs to be arrested, decides to save Bucky both for Bucky’s protection AND so those trying to bring him in doesn’t get hurt/killed. Once Bucky is safely arrested, Steve lets the situation go.
Oh, before I really get into infinity wars, there is no mention of Wanda harming other people even accidentally. :)
Tony, as usual, ignores what others wanted, like strange, and think he knows what’s best. He plans to fight thanos henchman by himself as well as thanos completely ignoring the concept of teamwork. (He also jumps to insulting others for his own shits and giggles—keep in mind, these are people he doesn’t know).
What does Steve do?
He was successfully on the run with nat and Sam and they worked together as a TEAM to save vision. They then meet up with rhodey and formulate a plan as to how to stop thanos. Steve coordinates with various people to have the battle in Wakanda. He doesn’t assume he can fight thanos by himself or should.
Steve refuses to trade lives because every life is valuable.
When the Snap happens, Tony fucks up into his cabin in the woods and lives his life.
And what does Steve do?
Run a support group to keep hope alive for people who are trying to see the best in a shitty situation.
He stays an avenger and does whatever needs to be done because he’s there to serve the people regardless of the despair he feels.
Don’t get it twisted, Steve is not perfect, but he constantly led by example, put the wants and needs of others before himself, was a hands on mentor, listened and supported others, and refused to leave anyone behind and/or die. He was always willing to be the only man fighting the battle and even to die for his beliefs.
And this man is called selfish by some.
Where as Tony consistently believed he knew what was best for others, was willing to let people die, was a shit mentor, mocked and ridiculed others, put his own feelings first, etc.
And this is seen as a leader???
Let’s not forget that dangerous tech he left to a MINOR after he died. Peter was so overwhelmed by the responsibility, he gave it to the first person who listened to him and who he believed to be responsible. This isn’t a condemnation of people. Again, his a literal minor—15 or 16. Who is overwhelmed about the shit stark left on his shoulders.
When old cap spoke to Sam, he gave AN ADULT, his shield. One with loved experiences and who knew how to handle complicated feelings. He knew what Sam was willing to handle and could handle.
And another thing: the fact that people were willing to go on the run with Steve says a lot. This is the second time Steve has been on the run and people, Sam and nat, were willing to follow him and assist (both times).
Tony couldn’t even get people to stay faithful to the legal accords. Rhodey said peace out as soon as cap returned. Nat abandoned Tony to join Steve. Vision questioned his life choices, and then went black to be with Wanda. And Peter didn’t know what the fuck was going on.
And Tony stans think he should’ve been leader based off of using his money for the avengers and giving them a place to crash.
LOL!
People want Wanda to apologize to Tony for invading his mind when he should apologize for her parents dying. If you’re a weapons manufacturer, there’s no such thing as believing only the “good guys” will use your weapons. You know your weapons could and will get into the wrong hands. And you also know that without war, you’d be out of a job. But, also the “good guys” are usually imperialist who fuck over other countries as they undermined these government structures to steal resources from them and other shit.
Just because starks stopped manufacturing weapons doesn’t mean he can escape accountability for what his weapons did to others.
Tony also ratted out that Clint had a family and was fine with them being jailed because they took the “wrong” side. Did he apologize to any of these people? The ones he had jailed and the ones who were forced to go on the run for a bill he supported, and then admitted was fucked up? (The same law he later broke twice.)
But, he’s a leader???
#pro captain america#pro steve rogers#steve rogers defence club#Steve rogers#Captain America#pro tony stark#pro iron man#anti tony stark#anti tony stans#anti iron man#for every post I see mistagged I’m mistagging my own#if I can’t peruse the Steve tags without anti mess you can’t do that with the Tony tag#:)#childish but I don’t care
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About Dream’s Tweets...
To begin with, I’m demisexual and have been part of the community for years - I think I have pretty good credence to speak on this matter. I try not to throw my two cents into situations like this because I can’t stand the ignorant responses of the internet anymore at my age - DeviantArt Dark Ages vet right here - but sometimes I just have to. Whether you agree or not, I could honestly care less, but I would appreciate it if you read everything and gave it some thought before responding, be it positive or negative. With that said, let’s dive in...
At this point, if people are taking the shipping/fanservice jokes and banter between the Dream Team and other creators surrounding them seriously, I don't know what to tell them or really even say, honestly. They've all stated they're not looking to start relationships with each other - multiple times and on-stream/Twitter, might I add, because people keep donating and asking/demanding an answer to both that and about their sexualities - and that it's just messing around with friends. (If we want to talk about making people uncomfortable and being offensive in that regard, don’t you worry because I've got opinions on that too.) Bottom line is, you can't get mad at them for the fan-service now when you supported it before, especially when nothing has changed and they’ve been transparent about how everything actually is.
I understand that some may feel it’s an insensitive and inappropriate thing to do in some regards, and that's perfectly valid, but please don't go mobbing through the town with pitchforks over literal jokes between friends. Keep in mind, they’ve made it clear that’s all it was before people starting jumping down their throats, and still there are groups using their sexuality to attack them over it because "YoU'rE nOt MlM sO yOu CaN't MaKe ThOsE jOkEs, YoU'rE hOmOpHoBiC!!!!!" They're even openly attacking lesbians and bisexuals - whether they agree with them or not - because they're not gay and that somehow renders their words “invalid.” You can't accuse them of being ignorant for messing around as friends because it entertains the fans, and then turn around to attack literally the entire rest of the community for offering their opinions because they aren't valid enough for you in the argument to count - that makes you ignorant. You also can’t claim to be of the opinion that everyone’s sexuality is their own business, but then demand for them not to be ambiguous about it when it pleases you. Honestly, even thinking about people doing that is so incredibly hypocritical that it gives me whiplash.
I completely understand not everyone is a fan of this behavior, but to accuse them of queerbaiting, being homophobic and faking allyship over it all right now is just ridiculous and borderline disgusting to me. They've made it clear they're not romantically interested in one another countless times and that it's just fun between friends because they're super close - they aren't playing the "Am I, or am I not?" game with anyone for gain so no, they're not queerbaiting. Queerbaiting is when it’s not explicitly said at any point whether someone is or isn’t LGBTQIA+ so they can play both the community and conservative side by putting them in ambiguous situations that can lean one way or the other for gain, whether it be monetary or otherwise. Not to mention, if they were really as “homophobic” and “falsely allied” as everyone thinks, why would other LGBTQIA+ creators such as Antfrost, Eret, Scott Major, etc. not only support them, but also consider them friends? Again, I get the offense and hurt people might have taken from this behavior, but your opinions and feelings are ultimately not universal so while they are all valid, that doesn't make them right and the final say on the matter. I don’t mean this to say you’re wrong or inferior in the argument, just that you can’t demand others to see your point of view and abide by it without granting them the same respect. The road goes both ways kiddos, I’m sorry.
Side note, there's no one to blame but the fans themselves for the jokes and whatnot to have continued on this long because they not only supported it, but also actively encouraged it. It’s been taken so seriously that Dream has outright stated on a stream - and now on Twitter - that he and George aren't together and more than likely never will be because they're honest to goodness just really good friends screwing around. Now if you think you're uncomfortable as part of the community, how do you think they feel being accused every five minutes of being against it because they won’t openly state their sexuality? Not to mention, they can't ever talk about actual relationships or joke about other ships because people will literally send death threats to whoever the other party is because they're "rUiNiNg ThE sHiP" at this point - need I remind you of the Septiplier fiasco? It’s alright if it’s a persona or a personality, but for the love of all things holy, please stop treating people like Barbie dolls that you’re trying to make kiss. They gave us the go-ahead to ship them because it makes us happy and allows us to be creative with the concept - don’t ruin it by trying to force them to play the parts you’ve constructed in your head and then get pissy because they won’t.
Also, it is unbelievably messed up for you to donate money to ask their sexuality and/or for them to tell each other that they love them - which then basically makes it a demand because if they ignore it they get blasted for not responding and “taking their money.” For example, Dream will say he loves any of his friends without issue because he does - just not in the way everyone is assuming or wants - and that's just the type of person he is, but George doesn't like to express it that way and that's okay. He shows his love in other ways that we don't always need to know about or see to make it real, just as it is with anyone else in the world. I don’t know how so many people miss it, but when he gets a donation to tell Dream - or anyone for that matter - he loves him on stream, you can easily tell how uncomfortable it makes him - and yes Dream presses/teases him about it sometimes, but he still drops it and doesn't flame him for it for eternity. Those that donate and chat, on the other hand, will not let it go when he doesn’t say it and continue to pour donations in begging him to say it when he’s already made it clear he won’t. You honestly shouldn't be bribing them to say or do anything through donation because that's beyond messed up and manipulative, especially where these matters are concerned.
And even if they weren't straight - which used to be the case and may have changed by this time, we can’t determine such things nor should we try to - or were in a relationship with each other, it isn't any of your goddamn business to know - no way, no how. What they do offline and out of the public eye isn't anyone's business but their own and people need to respect that, not try to force it out of them or play detective to dox that information for the attention. I mean, if you want a good reason as to why Dream hasn't done a face reveal yet, this is absolutely number one on the list because there will be little to no form of privacy for him after he does and he isn't ready to lose that just yet. I certainly can’t blame him for that considering all that’s been happening to him and his friends as of late, and neither can multiple other creators who hold the same beliefs and fears - ie. CorpseHusband, H20Delirious, Ohmwrecker. No one should have to tip-toe on eggshells in their personal life because fans online don't understand boundaries, that's just cruel and unfair after providing the content and comfort that they do without asking anything but support in return.
At the end of the day, I truly just don't understand how people can join in and support the jokes that they've made clear are purely just messing around, but then turn around and crucify them for the exact same thing later down the road. How can you practically harass them about their sexuality and relationship status through providing monetary means, then go on a witch hunt because they’ve decided to be more private with that information in the present? You can't play both sides and then expect to somehow be right or justified in the situation whichever way the tide turns because, at that point, the only wrong one is you. I completely agree that they need to watch their step with what they say and do sometimes - just as everyone with a strong platform does - but only more so now because people will create a problem the second they do anything that could spin into them being horrible people with too much power.
They’re all still incredibly fresh and new to the realm of social media popularity all things considered, and they reached said popularity startlingly fast so it can’t be easy to adjust to all the attention on everything you say and do. With that said, they’re doing remarkably well so far and I have faith that they’re going to continue to learn and grow in this arena given the time. They might mess up and make mistakes - already have, in fact - but that’s part of the gig and you can’t always please or satisfy everyone, so the best you can do is acknowledge your faults and move forward. You can’t demand someone’s head on a pike when they’ve made an effort to right things and it wasn’t good enough for everyone, it’s just not a fair standard to hold anyone to. In that same vein, you also can’t demand whatever you want out of them with the excuse that they owe it to you as a fan - you’re not a fan in any way, shape or form when you play that card, and you need to either shape up or ship out if you're doing that.
If you don't support it and/or don't like it, just don't follow or watch them anymore, it’s truly as simple as that. You can't continue to watch and support them as a “fan” while also touting how ignorant and horrible they are as detractors, that's just not how it works - pick one or the other and stop attacking them and those that don’t agree with you. They’re only on year one of their careers and the amount of people trying to “cancel” and tear them down over things that really aren't issues already is ridiculous, you aren't the righteous keyboard warriors you think you are and it's things like this that are ruining the internet for everyone, not just you.
That’s all I have to say on the matter and will continue to say going forward - sorry if you came here looking for my usual nonsense, but I really felt this needed to be said and addressed. I usually try not to do these sort of rants, however, this is a serious matter and a discussion that we as a community have been needing to have for a while, so now’s as good a time as any.
So, with my peace being given and my two cents thoroughly tossed, why don’t we focus on the bigger issues with YouTube such as their blatant ignorance of pedophilia and copyright abuse? Those seem like a much bigger problems to address at this point in time since that effects creators and fans as a whole - both in the present and the future - don’t you think?
#don't sleep won't sleep#sleep is for the living#rants with mady#dream team#dreamwastaken#georgenotfound#sapnap#dreamnotfound#tldr#the hypocrisy is SCORCHING rn#there are no pedestals to me#been there done that with other creators#ain't no one special in my eyes#this is just an explanation of another viewpoint#all replies welcome#sorry not sorry kiddos#LGBTQIA+
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