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mystsee · 7 months

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MESMERIZED ✦ KEEGAN P. RUSS

✦ about: keegan is mesmerized with you since he first met you ♡

✦ content: NSFW +18, virgin!reader, afab reader, blood, guns & death mentions, panic attacks, misogyny

✦ a.n: the boots i kinda imagined are the moonboots!

.・。.・゜✭・.・✫・゜・。.

in the sun-kissed landscapes of italy, you, with your captivating charm and surprising intelligence, was dealing with a meeting with very higher ups in the politic world, things were going so far so good.

that was until your boss, a figure whom you trusted very much, revealed to you the news. a deployment to russia as a military translator.

nervous feelings ran down your spine, not from the revelation of a new challenge, but from the anticipation of russia’s frigid embrace. most of the time, you were assigned to help translate in missions involving trafficking, drugs, dark stuff like that. and having to translate for the “bad guys” involved them being not so nice to you. mostly because they don’t like a woman all up on their dark buisness.

nevertheless, you knew you were going to be protected, and the military people have never treated you wrong.

you prepared your clothes, having to use a bigger backpack due to all the puffy jackets, scarfs, you know, all cold related things. which you do not protest! the colder the weather, the better you can dress.

right now you had a puffy black jacket, warm leggings with a thick skirt attached! it was 100x more comfortable because now your ass didn’t have to feel all the cold seats anymore. and of course your puffy boots, thick beige fur covering the boots. one thing about you is your feet were always cold, making you use like 3 layers of socks!

you arrived late night, making the cold even worse but you managed to cover the lower half of your face with your scarf, seriously the cold was so bad in here. as you disembarked from the helicopter, the biting russian cold embraced you, making you shiver involuntarily.

you were greeted warmly by your captain “nice to see you again over here” he smiled warmly “i’m glad too, really missed the artic” he laughed at that, how could he be out here with only a small jacekt?!

he noticed your shivering frame, you thought you were hiding it well, making him start leading you through the snow-covered landscape over to base.

upon entering, all eyes turned towards you – a mix of amazement and curiosity danced in the gaze of your new colleagues, you knew your boots were quite attention catching, probably why everyone kept staring at you.

to say you were pretty was little, it was obvious everyone in the room found you beautiful, but you didn’t pay it any mind, again thinking maybe your boots were standing out a bit too much, not the way your thighs looked so good with the skirt on top, but! they would need to get used to see your babies, they were your go-to in cold weather.

however, one pair of eyes stood out, belonging to keegan. he almost looked mesmerized with you. he watched you stride with an unyielding confidence, almost model like, the skirt making your hips move so so pretty, that it was making it hard for him to stop staring at you.

somehow your eyes found his, thanking the heavens you had your scarf covering your cheeks because you were blushing so hard rn, his gaze lingered, an admiring intensity in his eyes that you almost tripped.

only his eyes, a window to the unspoken thoughts within, were visible, making you curious. as his fellow soldier spoke, keegan’s attention remained freezed on you, his focus unyielding, and the words of his comrade fading into the background of his silent admiration.

the spell was broken as soon as the captain opened the door to his office, inviting you in to debrief the mission with you. you were going with keegan’s team to help them gather intel, they were trying to find a very big drug dealer, and you translating, would help them find him faster.

tomorrow morning would be your first mission with them, yet you still didn’t know who keegan was, making it intriguing whom you’d be working with.

captain showed you your room, it was a basic military room, a twin sized bed in the middle, small vanity to your left, a desk in the other size to the room, and a small window, last but not least, your own bathroom.

you pleaded your boss to give you your own bathroom, there was enough experiences a girl can have in a shared bathroom used by men.

you started investigating about who you were translating for tomorrow, loosing the track of time. by the time you finished it was 3 am, making you worry a little, you were leaving tomorrow at 6 am.

you were almost going to bed when your stomach rumbled, making you internally groan, you knew that if you didn’t sleep, insomnia would make its way to you.

rolling your eyes you went to the kitchen, you thought everyone was asleep rn, so you paid no mind yo your outfit, a small cropped sweatshirt, leggings and fluffy slippers.

you were about to eat your slice of bread with jam when a sudden voice made you drop it to the washer “can’t sleep?” “jesus fuck!” you swore you felt your heart stop for a second, you never saw anyone in here!

you turned around to see the same guy from before, keegan, who just stared at you, seated in a chair with a book in his hands, it almost looked like he was trying to contain his laugh.

“what’s wrong with you!” you said with a smile laughing, he probably saw your bread jump to the washer “me? nothing, was just asking” he said it so proud of himself “how do you even read with all the lights off?” by now you had turned to him, still by the counter “i wasn’t reading, i was drinking tea” “oh” you never saw the cup of tea beside the book silly you.

“just know you ruined my dinner” you said pouting “and you asked my what’s wrong with me” he said scoffing “oh come on, don’t tell me you don’t eat late at night” “no i do princess, just not a bread with jam at 3 in the morning” his nickname made you stop your breath for a second, deciding to pay no mind to it “but you do you princess” he was by your side now, putting his cup of tea in the washer, until you saw him freeze next to you, there was small light coming from outside, oh yea, you had no bra on.

he could see see your breasts, your nipples to be precise, under your sweatshirt, practically begging to be touched, your sweatshirt was so small it had ridden up just a tiny bit when you were making your dinner, making keegan see a small part of your under breast.

“princess” keegan suddenly moved closer to you, making you see his eyes better, revealing a captivating shade of blue, a mesmerizing hue that held a subtle warmth within its cool depths, caught your attention.

his gaze, unwavering in its intensity, sent a gentle warmth through you, leaving a blush on your cheeks again, a silent acknowledgment of the unspoken connection forged in that shared moment.

“you still don’t know my name” which was true making you ask for it, when he said it, he saw the realization in your eyes “oh! i’m working with you in the next mission” you said a bit breathlessly “glad to have you with us” you could see the deep appreciation for you in his eyes.

keegan had heard about you, he knew of your well-regarded reputation as a translator, held a silent acknowledgment of the confidentiality that shrouded your professional endeavors.

in the subtle lines of his expression, you could see respect for the enigma that surrounded you, a recognition that spoke volumes without uttering a single word. “thank you” you said, he just nodded to you, he was so close to you now you could feel his chest, and his chest could feel your nipples. you just held your breath keeping eye contact with him “well, princess, you must get your sleep, i won’t keep you up” you were in a trance when he moved, snapping you out of it “goodnight keegan” you said in a small voice. keegan smiled behind his mask.

ever since then, a connection quietly unfolded between you and keegan. it initially started as him being a distant observer, he always kept his eyes on you everywhere you went, even more when you were speaking russian towards the males, you held such confidence with you he was deeply allured with you.

his presence evolved into a silent shield, a comforting assurance amidst the unfamiliarity of a foreign land. he may couldn’t understand russian, but he sure as hell could see the body language and the tones they were speaking to you.

everytime he could sense any sort of verbal assault at you, his steely gaze fixed upon the adversaries with an intensity that spoke volumes, as well as his hidden raised gun;), sensing the weight of his silent threat, they found themselves silenced. even though you had no idea he was threatening them behind you.

you always knew keegan had your back, and silently thanked him for it. as the time passed, you felt keegan more protective of you, and you more attentive of him, you two were almost all the time together.

there were moments, a shared smile in the midst of icy winds, or a wordless understanding in the chaos of a mission, that spoke louder than words. in these instances, his protective instinct manifested – a steady hand guiding you through the challenges, a silent assurance that you were not alone. metaphorically as well as physically.

his interactions evolved into a touch that carried a warmth beyond mere protection. his gestures, once purely professional, became tinged with an affectionate familiarity.

a guiding hand on the small of your back during a mission briefing or a reassuring touch on your shoulder in moments of uncertainty, each contact seemed to convey a connection that lingered beyond the realm of your relationship.

these touches carried a feeling of something more, a silent language of shared emotions between you and him. in the hushed moments when his hand lingered a second longer than necessary or the gentle squeeze that accompanied a reassuring smile.

in the dim glow of the base's common area, keegan’s touches continued to weave a tapestry of unspoken connection. a shared moment over a map had his fingers brushing against yours, the contact lingering for a heartbeat longer than required, it was practically normal for you to be blushing around him now.

during a particularly challenging mission, his arm found its way around your shoulders, a protective embrace in the face of caos. in that moment you just wanted to be beside him all the time, you felt safe around him.

there was also a time in which keegan was behind you, listening to what you would be doing, until he felt rather not okay with what you were supposed to do. he suddenly put his hand discreetly on your waist, and the other arm in front of your chest, his hand subtly telling “no”

“she’s with us, meaning we protect her, what you’re saying is risky for her, she won’t do it” you felt warmth on your chest. you have never experienced this, the other teams you had been were never this attentive with you. it was a weird emotion for you, you were used to always seek for yourself.

in the quiet of the nights, a shared gaze held more than words could express. keegan’s hand, a reassuring presence, sought yours across the table, fingers intertwining with yours, squeezing your fingers every now and then. he did that more times than you could count.

the line between friendship and something deeper became increasingly blurred, leaving both of you suspended in the uncharted territory of unspoken emotions.

the endearing term "princess" slipped from his lips almost all the time, a word you loved hearing from him even though you never tell him. it became a private language, whether in the midst of a mission or during quiet evenings, the endearment echoed, making you warm inside all the time.

keegan’s feelings had transcended the boundaries of friendship, evolving into a profound connection that bordered into almost being in love with you.

his gaze, once intense, now carried a softness that showed a deep admiration, a mesmerizing allure that held him captivated in your presence.

his eyes just seemed to follow you everywhere, absorbing every detail of you, every facet of your being, as if etching your essence into his soul.

the desire to be with you became a palpable force, an unspoken longing that lingered in the spaces between conversations. the way his fingers sought yours, the way he leaned in, just a fraction closer than necessary – each action seemed to fluster you more and more.

you too couldn’t deny it, you felt drawn to him, but even with the warmth of his company and shared moments, there was a bit of confusion.

your feelings were kind of mixed up, wanting to connect with him but also feeling unsure about it. it’s like a struggle between what your heart wants and what your head is thinking.

you just don’t know how to respond to him :(

figuring out your own feelings became a bit like wandering through a maze, with no clear destination.

being close to keegan made you feel good, but accepting his love brought its own set of uncertainties. you tried taking things one step at a time, trying to make sense of your own heart and the budding feelings between you two.

until you just couldn’t anymore

you were in a very heated meeting with keegan, as always, behind you, talking to a very dangerous person, in a very dangerous place, at any moment now something could happen, making you feel on edge all the time there. you felt keegan’s hand hold your shoulder softly, reminding you he is here with you.

in the middle of the conversation, you saw in less than a second the man’s eyes change, from angry, to weirdly happy, like he was going to be free from all this interrogation. you were confused, until you heard it.

bullets and bullets and more bullets echoed in the building, as well as some passing through the windows in the small office you were. in a second keegan had moved you, shielding you from any possible damage

you heard him speak to the captain, the captain said they were under attack, making difficult to get out of there. you were alone inside with keegan and the man, he was tied to the table though, so you weren’t worried he would escape.

keegan held you behind his back, opening the door and checking if it was safe to go out. he made a clear sign and went to the right side. you were shaking of fear, you could hear explosions all over the place, the shaking of the floor, bullets everywhere, it was crazy.

suddenly a man spawned out of nowhere pulling keegan and tried stabbing him.

the military gave you a gun before you left, you had basic military training, knew how to use a gun, yet never needed to. but seeing keegan almost being stabbed made you react on instinct, you pulled your gun in less than a second and shoot the bastard. keegan’s was free from the man’s arm and shot another bullet between his head.

you just stood there, the adrenaline was making it hard to process what just happened, but you could feel your body trembling with fear, you may have possibly just killed a man. you’ve never done that in your life.

keegan saw the fear in your eyes “princess, hey, i need you to focus on me” keegan’s grabbed your face, you stared at him, worry clear in your eyes “you saved me and you’re a fucking badass for that” keegan’s appreciation words dragged you out of the dark thoughts you were falling to.

you both heard footsteps approaching you, making keegan grab your hand, tight, and walked to the other direction, you moved faster than him, adrenaline was making you rushed now, until you were about to move to the other corner of the hallway and saw armed men looking for, you supposed, keegan and you.

you pushed keegan back, startling him for a second, until he could hear the voices. you had a door next to you, keegan opened it and dragged you both inside. it was small, very small, yet enough for hiding. keegan turned you so his back was to the door, always protecting you first.

you on the other hand, was shaking shitless again, you could understand what they were saying, they were here for you, obviously not happy at all that you knew about what they were doing.

keegan once again tried dragging you out of your starting panic attack, he said your name twice trying to get your attention. you looked at him, you were very much fucking scared.

“hey, you’re with me, i won’t let anything happen to you okay?” you felt one of keegan’s hand hold your head softly, the other went to your back. you then realized he was hugging you, you were so close to each other he didn’t even need to moved you closer. you moved your hands to hold his back too, resting your head on his shoulder.

in the middle of the chaotic circumstances, keegan emerged as your anchor, his presence became the grounding point that helped you survive this.

it was then when it hit you, the realization, the profound connection that resonated beyond words. attempting to utter his name, you found your voice stifled by anxiety, your very core trembling with fear.

keegan, ever perceptive, tightened his hold around you, a silent reassurance.

as the threat passed by your door, keeping your mouth shut became a necessity, not just for the mission at hand but also to guard the burgeoning emotions inside you.

after a few minutes, you could hear them muffled, meaning they were far. keegan opened the door, still holding you, and looked out, he saw that it was clear “let’s go princess”

the next few minutes was you and keegan trying to get out of here, it was almost like a maze, the explosions seemed to calm down as well as the bullets. but there was still people looking for you.

you were about to turn to your left when a hand grabbed you from your neck, choking you, you tried to scream, but the man was fast, he suddenly pushed you to the wall, punching you in the face, almost breaking your nose, but you moved just in time your face, hitting you in the cheek.

you suddenly remembered you had a gun, you pulled it out, raising it fast to the middle of his head and shot him quick.

it was ugly, scary, and it glued you to your spot, all his blood soaked you, yet his hold on you loosened, making the man fall to your shoulder, surely staining your coat.

you were so fucking scared you thanked the lord keegan grabbed the man and lunched him to the wall behind.

you were again almost in shock, but keegan was in front of you fast “come on baby, we need to leave this hell” keegan kept dragging you, your body fully trusting him, because you were going into shock now.

you saw light, and finally you were out, a few dead people scattered on the ground, not helping you at all.

it until you saw the familiar humvee you felt slight ease. everyone saw your state, blood soaking all your face, dripping all over your coat. quite a sight. keegan just shakes his head to his teammates, silently telling them that you needed space now.

the soldiers admired you, even cared for you after all this time, it was clear seeing you like this worried them, but they trusted keegan, and they know you trust keegan too.

keegan helped you up the humvee, sitting next to you, you felt him whispering beside you “you okay?” you just nodded taking a small ragged breath, wiping your nose. you felt disgusting, you could feel the man’s blood dripping down your nose, the need to shower was strong right now.

keegan just softly held your hand, squeezing it to help you ground yourself, but you just couldn’t, you were so bloody anxious right now you couldn’t stop moving your leg up and down.

keegan felt it, slightly worried about you, he knew you’ve never been in combat before, let alone kill someone. you felt his hand slowly let go of yours, and put it on top of your thigh, making you halt your movements.

he kept it there slightly above your knee, massaging a little, not daring to move his hand up higher.

the ride to base was just the captain talking to someone on the radio, other than that, it was silent.

as soon as you arrived to base, you hurried out of the humvee, and fast towards the barracks, feeling the weight of the mission on your shoulders. you desperately needed the shower.

keegan stayed by the humvee, not following you right away. he stood there, giving you room. he could understand the impact of what just happened, and knew letting you calm down first was a good idea.

the letting you calm down time meant maybe you would come out of your room later, but now, it was 11:45 pm, and keegan was more than worried about you now. he had no idea you were still in the shower, living the past event over and over in your head.

you just couldn’t erase the image from your brain, just seeing the man’s eyes go lifeless in front of you, it was such a crazy thing to look at, and you weren’t dealing with it very okay.

you felt dirty, even though you cleaned your body more than twice. you had lost the track of time, you were so inside your brain you forgot to eat something. your stomach begging for food now, making you feel nauseous.

you just put on a brown long sleeve sweatshirt with some random leggings. you knew it was last midnight now, making it easier for you, you didn’t want to see anyone right now.

keegan, on the verge of heading to your room, noticed you entering the kitchen. your eyes were red, and your nose was puffy – the signs of tears evident. the concern on his face deepened as he observed the aftermath of emotions that had washed over you. he paused, recognizing the fragility in your demeanor, reconsidering whether to approach and offer comfort in this vulnerable moment.

spotting keegan in the kitchen, you froze in place. your hair, still damp, added a chill to the atmosphere, and a subtle shiver ran through you. keegan stood there, his worry evident in his eyes. the unspoken concern made you feel a twinge of guilt for disappearing, realizing the impact it had on him.

feeling the wave of emotions crash over you once again, tears welled up, and sobs escaped despite your efforts. a whispered "i'm sorry" escaped your lips, muffled by your trembling hand pressed against your mouth. the vulnerability laid bare.

in an instant, keegan was by your side. dressed in a simple black sweatshirt and cargo pants, he became your anchor once again.

his chest against your trembling form, you held him tight, as if seeking solace in the warmth of his presence. his hands gently cradled your head and waist, offering a silent reassurance, “nothin’ to be sorry about princess” you could feel his deep voice rumble in his chest “it’s okay”

his hand now gently petting your hair as you clung to him. between sobs, you began to express the guilt weighing on your chest. "i feel so bad for leaving like that" you admitted, the words punctuated by shaky breaths.

the shock of your actions you did a while ago lingered, casting a shadow on your thoughts. the vulnerability in sharing your feelings with keegan felt both liberating and daunting. it was a bad habit of yours, disappear whenever you felt any emotion that wasn’t happiness. it was normal to you:( even if it’s been more than 12 hours since you last emerged from your room.

keegan’s voice, calm and reassuring, cut through the heaviness of the moment. "it's okay," he whispered, his hand still tenderly stroking your hair. "you're here now, and that's what matters."

a flicker of strength ignited within you, and you stood a little taller, you pressed a tender kiss on keegan’s cheek, your hand lingering on his face for a heartbeat. his eyes held an unspoken love, you could see it clearly now.

keegan’s question for the kiss hung in the air, a gentle curiosity evident in his gaze. you felt his mask close and his breaths deepen, you took a moment, meeting his intense eyes. "it’s a thank you," you said softly, "for always protecting me."

his response was a tightening of the embrace, bringing you even closer. his face, now near yours, held an intensity matched by the deep breaths he took. in a rough voice deep with emotion, he confessed, "you driving me fucking crazy." the admission hung in the air, your cheeks flushing furiously.

a playful challenge danced in your eyes as you maintained intense eye contact. "what if you show me how much I drive you crazy?" you suggested, your doe eyes locked onto his.

a groan escaped him as he dropped his head to your shoulder. laughter bubbled from you, but your breath hitched as keegan shifted, causing your sweatshirt to ride up slightly. the short length and absence of a bra made you almost flash him your right breast.

keegan could feel it, in fact, he could feel your nipples pressed on him since he hugged you, making his pants feel tighter.

you felt keegan’s hand move up, near your breast, starting to massage there, making you blush furiously “may i remind you were are still in public keegan” you didn’t want anyone walk in on keegan almost touching your breasts, in the middle of the kitchen.

startling you in a swift motion, he lifted you off the ground, his strong hold on your bum leaving you feeling both surprised and strangely like jelly inside, and before you could voice your concerns, he began walking towards your room.

you were silently screaming at him about the possibility of getting caught, but keegan just tightened his hold on you more like squeezing your booty, effectively silencing you.

the situation didn't seem to faze him as he navigated the corridors, your protests muted in the intensity of the moment. the world outside seemed to fade away as keegan carried you and opened your door, leaving behind a trail of laughter and a flutter of unspoken excitement.

you thought he was going to drop you now, but no! he just went to your bed, and dropped you, making you bounce and laugh at what he just did “such a romantic” keegan just held the back of your legs and dragged you near his cock.

that motion made your shirt roll up, now showing him your bare breasts. you widened your eyes a little, but keegan looked like he was more enamored by you now “what a fucking sight i have” he couldn't help but revel in the intimate view of you beneath him. your eyes, filled with affection, locked onto his, radiating a warmth that mirrored the depth of your connection.

the air thickened with tension, and keegan couldn't ignore the tightening in his pants, a physical response to the emotional intimacy and the allure of the moment. “look how you make me feel princess” you could feel it, near your cunt, his big cock, making a big tent in his pants.

you just couldn’t anymore, you rolled your hips up a little, the sensation almost made you cum on the spot, but keegan just made a noise of disapproval “nuh uh, let me have my time with my princess yeah?” you blushed even more when keegan took a hold of your hips, and slowly moved his hands up, dying to touch your breasts.

when his hands finally felt them, he was on cloud 9. they were so soft and moldeable in his hands he could feel precum leaking from his cock. keegan lowered himself close your breasts, rolled his mask up, and licked your nipple making you moan.

he started sucking on your nipple like a man starved, while the other hand groped your other breast, pinching your nipple and rolling it between his fingers. you were panting, his hands were god sent, as well as his mouth.

that’s when you felt the sudden urge to kiss him. and you couldn’t wait anymore. feeling the magnetic pull, you took charge, gently dragging his face upward to meet yours. in a bold move, your lips crashed against his, a collision of desire and longing.

a sound of contentment escaped keegan, emotions flowing between you like an electric current. the world outside the moment ceased to exist as the intensity of the kiss spoke volumes, an unspoken exchange of emotions and desires woven into the fabric of that stolen, passionate embrace.

keegan deepened the kiss even more, angling your head better, he was heaven sent. in the heat of the kiss, your hands, seemingly of their own accord, found their way to his mask. it became an unconscious exploration, a touch laden with curiosity. unexpectedly, keegan broke the kiss, startling you, and swiftly snatched away his mask.

in the soft glow of the small light, his face was revealed, and you found yourself enraptured by the sight of him.

"you’re so beautiful" the words slipped from your lips almost involuntarily. a deep resonance of satisfaction echoed in keegan’s chest, and without a moment's hesitation, he dragged you up. seated on his knees, you found yourself straddling him, his hands on your waist and bum, fondling with it making you whine, as your lips met again in a deep, intoxicating kiss, yet you felt needy.

involuntarily you moved your hips, grinding right on his cock, making him groan deeply “fuck baby, you’re going to make me cum” knowing he was as aroused as you made you feel even more needy, making you grind your hips even more.

keegan’s hand took a hold of your hips, making you stop your movements. you whined again, even surprising you, you’ve never met this side of you, so needy of someone.

keegan's touch on your face was soft, almost reverent. he spoke with a gentle intensity, "i want to worship you. let me." the request hung in the air, and you, captivated by the depth of his gaze, agreed with a simple nod.

with deliberate tenderness, keegan laid you back onto the bed, his hands moving to the fabric of your clothes. He began with your sweatshirt, each movement deliberate and unhurried, as if unraveling the layers of vulnerability and desire between you two. as he raised your sweatshirt up, his hands once again touched your breasts, making you moan lowly.

keegan just smirked, having removed your sweatshirt, he then proceeded to shed his own shirt. the unveiling of his toned body drew an involuntary blush to your cheeks. his eyes caught yours, and a playful smile graced his lips.

"like what you see?" he teased, the husky timbre of his voice adding a layer of seduction to the moment. the air hung heavy with anticipation as you met his gaze, your response a silent affirmation that echoed in the space between you two.

keegan, still holding your gaze with an intensity that spoke volumes, continued his deliberate exploration. his hands, deft and unhurried, moved to your leggings.

with tenderness, he peeled them away, revealing more of your vulnerability. the room seemed to pulse with shared desire as each layer of clothing fell away, creating an intimate tapestry of connection between you and Keegan.

you were only with your panties on now, and keegan with his grey boxers, not hiding anything, making you slightly anxious, he looked very big, and you’ve never done this before.

a sudden realization gripped you, and you couldn't help but say, "wait" keegan, on the verge of sliding your panties off, halted immediately, his expression shifting to one of concern.

nervously, you confessed, "i’ve never done this before." the vulnerability in your admission hung in the air, an unspoken plea for understanding and patience. the room, once charged with desire, now held a new layer of intimacy.

keegan, surprised by your revelation, felt a renewed sense of responsibility. he looked into your eyes, the desire tempered with understanding, and reassured you, "i’ll go slow. we’ll take it at your pace."

his words carried a gentle promise, a commitment to make you feel at ease in this intimate moment. keegan then slowly slide your panties off, your cunt now bare and displayed in front of him. keegan just stared at it for a second, absolutely beautiful he thought; all shiny with your slick, begging for some attention. and who was he to deny it.

one thing about keegan, he loved foreplay, and you, you liked it too, but he’s made you cum twice! fingers and tongue involved, you weren’t complaining, but you really wanted his cock now.

from where you were, you could see his boxer stained with precum, making you whine, you were past needy now “i need you keegan, please” keegan heard the whiny tone from you, making his cock even more hard.

“such a needy princess aren’t you” keegan swiftly removed his boxers down, his cock sprang free on his stomach. your mouth was watering just seeing it. it was big, veiny and thick.

you didn’t think it, you were on all 4s now, keegan was looking behind dropping his boxer when he felt your mouth on his cock, making him hiss loud as well as whined “fuck princess, what are you doing?” you could hear his voice strained, like he was containing himself.

you didn’t answer, it was your first time doing this, yet you felt confident when you swallowed almost his whole cock down your throat, making keegan’s hands grab your head, pushing you deeper, making his eyes roll back.

“who taught you this?” he was a panting mess now, you kept bobbing your head up and down, using your angelic hands to grab his balls, swollen with his cum, massaging them, making keegan go all over the edge.

he didn’t warn you, just grabbed your head dragging it all the way down, thrusting his big cock down your throat, moaning loud. you decided to look at him then, giving your best puppy eyes you could, making keegan mesmerized with you, you could see all his reactions from here, his stomach clenching, his mouth panting, and his eyes full of love.

“i’m gonna cum love” you felt keegan trying to move his cock out of your mouth, but you just grabbed his hips, pushed them to you, and moving your tongue around his veiny cock.

keegan cummed on the spot, thick white ropes of cum going all the way down your throat, you as the princess you are, swallowed it whole, keeping your hand on his balls, feeling them clench everytime he cummed.

you were sure keegan was about to pass out now, that was the hardest orgasm he’s ever felt.

his desire was evident in the intensity of his gaze, deciding to take charge. his hands gently grasped your head, lifting you slightly making you put your hands on his big muscular chest. a deep, intense kiss ensued, each meeting of your lips sending a shiver through your body.

keegan murmured a sweet praise, "you’re such a beautiful good girl aren’t you?" he was still in his post orgasmic state, making you laugh a little, but this man had a very strong stamina.

you could feel his cock hard again in between your stomach making you put your hand on top of his slit. he bucked his hips a little “come on now” he said with a strained voice “let me make you feel good” desire evident in his voice.

keegan laid you down on the bed, moving your thighs open, letting your cunt once open to him. keegan not waisting a second now, aligned his cock with your cunt, dragging it up and down your folds “stop teasing keegan” you said pouting.

it took you by surprise when you felt his tip in your entrance, making you stop your breath for a second, keegan was smirking now, how easy it was to shut your needy ass up.

“i’ll go slow yeah? you tell me if it too much princess” keegan started sliding his thick cock insided your virgin cunt, it felt weird, a slight burn everytime he slide deeper.

keegan on the other hand was in awe, he saw your cunt swallowing his cock inside, inch by inch, your puffy clit at view too. in a second keegan had his hand on your clit, slowly circling it, making you moan, allowing his cock to slide further.

once he bottomed, he stayed there, he was still on his knees, allowing him a beautiful view. you had your knees next to your breasts, his cock swallowed by your cunt, your face flushed.

he couldn’t wait anymore, keegan dropped his forearms next to your head, and started grinding his cock inside your cunt. you felt so full, and him grinding was almost hitting your womb, making you moan loudly. “keegan you’re so deep” you said frowning from pleasure, your nails were on his big muscular biceps, hanging on for dear life.

“does it feel good?” “very fucking good” you said moaning the last word, keegan had his head hidden on your neck, his pace now a bit faster, balls hitting your ass everytime he thrusted, the skin to skin slapping sound resonating all over your room, creating such an erotic scene.

keegan then raised his head and kissed you deeply, his hand holding your head softly, you could feel him even deeper now. he had you on a mating press, his chest squeezing your breasts making your nipples stand out even more “you feel so fucking good princess” “this cunt belongs to me yeah” “you’re all fucking mine”

keegan kept saying this small praises everytime he thrusted, but what made your orgasm come quick was when he said you were his. yes you were. you were his since you met him. he was there for you ever since then, always by his side, always his.

“y-yes i am” keegan’s intense gaze was on you now “i’m yours keegan, all yours” he hit a particular spot inside you that you saw stars, moaning loud “say that again princess” “i’m yours” keegan was about to cum just from hearing you say that.

“and you’re all mine” you kissed him hard when you said that. keegan never thought you were the possessive type, yet when he heard you say that, you could say he fell in love even deeper “you’re all fucking mine keegan” you started meeting his thrusts with your hips, your clit rubbing with his stomach making your orgasm come fast.

keegan could feel it, you were clenching stronger now, almost making him stop his movements “you cumming princess?” that goddamn nickname was going to be the death of you “i want to cum with you”

your needy voice made keegan tighten his hold on you, and thrust deeper, and slower. keegan grabbed your face and kissed you, his other hand rubbing your clit. making you cum hard.

keegan cummed in an instant too, feeling your cunt clenching around his cock too, your orgasm so hard you closed your eyes. he cummed inside you, sliding even further, letting all his cum coat your walls with him. only him.

he stayed there for a while, letting you come down from the high. you were breathing hard, his cock now softening inside you, yet you didn’t want him to come out yet.

you used your feet to hit him on the hips, making him slide a bit more “stay here for a while” keegan caught the message, you wanted to cuddle. with him still inside you.

you were a sucker for cuddles, and touch starved. so when keegan laid down, still inside you, and dragged you almost on top of him, you felt shivers down your spine.

as keegan’s arms enveloped you in a tender embrace, a warmth spread through you, reaching the neglected corners of your soul. the gentle cradle of his arms was a stark contrast to the void you hadn’t realized existed, a reminder of the absence of such intimate touch in your life.

his arms forming a protective cocoon around you, fingers tracing soothing patterns on your back. the rise and fall of his chest against your back mirrored the rhythm of shared breaths, creating a serene melody.

it wasn't just the physical closeness; it was the profound sense of being seen and held, a silent promise that in his arms, you were cherished and safe.

a few minutes had passed when you felt keegan sitting up, you as well on his lap, making you pout “don’t make that face” he said condescending “i need to clean you up yeah?”

keegan carried you all the way down your bathroom, again, still inside you, and seated you on the counter. he took a really long look to your breasts. such beautiful breasts just sitting there, making him want to hold them again.

“enjoying the view” you said in a proud tone, keegan just moved his eyes to your face and laid a small kiss to your cheek. you started feeling how keegan slid his now soft cock out your cunt, once it was all out, he just stayed there, looking at both your cunt and his cock “look at the mess you made love”

his cock was full of his cum, and yours, you felt all his cum slide out of your cunt, now on the counter, the sight making keegan’s cock start hardening again, and you saw that as well.

you just stared at him, beautiful doe eyes, and grabbed his cock. “can’t get tired of this cock huh?” you just smiled, stood up, and dragged him to the shower. that was the best shower sex you’ve ever had.

after the shower, keegan was behind you like a lost puppy, just wanting to be near you, touching your waist, squishing it, as well as your bum, all while you were doing your small skin care.

and on bed? keegan was even more cuddly than you! he said, scratch that, obliged you to be the little spoon. now you had his beautiful face right next to you, his hand drawing small circles in your waist, going near your breasts to tease you, your legs tangled beneath the sheets. you could get used to this.

“so, for how long have i driven you crazy?” keegan heard the cheekiness in your voice, you probably knew keegan was head over heels for you, acting all dumb to torture him, making keegan groan behind you “i’m going to keep it with for a while”

you laughed, putting your hands on top of the one that was on your waist, dragging it near your lips, planting a soft kiss there. when you kissed his hand, an unexpected tenderness surged within him, like a flood of warmth.

in response, he hid his face against your neck, as if to shield himself from the cascade of emotions, laying a few kisses here and there. you really could get used to this.

♡

AHHHHHH the end ;’[ i love fluff, was deciding if splitting this into chapters but i got carried away and made it a one shot jiji

hope u liked it!

#keegan p russ #keegan russ x reader #keegan russ x you #call of duty keegan #keegan russ smut #cod keegan #cod smut #call of duty #call of duty fic #keegan russ #keegan russ fic #keegan russ fluff #cod #call of duty smut #simon ghost riley #keegan smut #keegan russ x fic #keegan x reader

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lemonyboy97 · 2 months

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Heyyy I like your writing, and I was wondering if you could do like fluff/comfort of like Val, vox, and/or alastor with a reader who gets really socially anxious and shuts down when they get overwhelmed?

Wasnt sure what gender reader was so i did neutral, thank you so much for the ask! I havent gotten one in forever and i was fresh out of inspo ❤️❤️🫂 love you anon! (Also i threw in different relationship dynamics to spice things up and also because i cant imagine alastor being ANYONES 'boyfriend', that man would go from 'close friend and confidant' to 'fiancé')

Pop in and leave me a request on my new blog!

Fiancé!Vox, Boyfriend!Val, Husband!Alastor (seperate) x gn!anxious!reader

Warnings: brief mentions of sadism, anxious reader (obviously), not quite my definition of a panic attack but close to it

(Im going to do some loose headcannons about each of the boiz, then include a oneshot for each of them)

Fiancé!Vox

Headcannons:

I feel like Vox would be the best out of the 3 in this scenario, as he's the least sadistic. Vox is a very protective lover, he's also compassionate and doting (behind closed doors). If Vox notices you (its really a matter of when not if because this man WILL notice) becoming overwhelmed or overstimulated he is gently guiding you away from the crowd to check on you, 'Are you okay?', 'do you want to leave?', 'is there something specific bothering you?' are FAQs (frequently asked questions) His way of dealing with the issue is removing you from the situation altogether- taking you back home, wether thats to your shared apartment or the Vee's headquarters depends on whichevers closest.

Scenario:

You and your fiance, Vox, are at a release event for the newest VoxTech drop. Vox is proudly harping about the newest Tech he’s developed, an even prouder arm around your waist; how could he not be proud with his pretty little love on his arm? (He calls you his ‘pretty little thing’, ‘little love’ no matter your gender or size) He’s so absorbed in his success that at first he doesn't notice the subtle tremble in your hands, or the way you curl into him as if trying to hide, or maybe the way you flinch at the bright camera flashes. But when you let out a barely audible whine Vox immediately turns to you, all ears.

Vox suddenly realizes how overstimulating this all must be; the flashing cameras, the loud and frantic crowd, the music in the background, the shouting, the rowdy demons who are protesting- oh god how could he have been so negligent?

Vox is immediately passing the reins over to Velvette (much to her dismay), and gingerly leading you through the crowd, towards the back door.

“It’s alright, lovely, just through here… There we go…”

His words are gentle, and the hands on your shoulders to guide you are 10x more so. He leads you out the back and to the limo, and once you’re sequestered away inside he just waits- He knows when you’re ready for touch you’ll initiate. He knows that for now, just the knowledge that someone is aware and looking after you is enough to help de-escalate the situation.

“There you go, doll, breathe yeah? In…. Out…. In…. Out… good job, love, doing so well for me”

Boyfriend!Valentino

Headcannons:

Val is definietly more of a 'what do you mean?' Kind of guy, or 'just breathe?', you know? We know from his workers (ahem angeldust ahem) that he isnt the most... understanding with weaknesses and the like. So- while I feel like Val's approach is a bit more 'deal with it by not dealing with it' than Vox's, it is still heartfelt for his wonderful gf/bf/partner. Even if he wont directly address it, Valentino is the type to try and reassure you through touch, wether thats what you need or not, thats what he's got because this man KNOWS he is brash and he doesnt want to make things worse.

Scenario:

You had walked to Valentino's studio to bring him homemade lunch after he was complaining about his imps being 'inconcievably incompetent'. You are now awkwardly standing backstage, out of sight, as he directs a particularily.... raunchy... scene. You are visibly uncomfortable with screams and various sounds of... mixed sensations.. echoing around the set, along with flashing lights and dizzying scents. Altogether they make an array of overstimulating inputs, and after setting down said lunch on a side bench, a pretty note tucked into the lip of the basket, you stumble back outside, trying to catch your breath. Val follows you shortly after, he caught sight of you from across the set.

Valentino carefully sits beside you, pulling you into his side.

"You alright there, babycakes?"

You shakily nod, but Val sees right through you. He sighs and kisses your temple as he absentmindedly rubs your shoulders.

"Thought I warned you 'bout my work hours, baby"

You slowly explain that you just wanted to surprise him with lunch and he smiles, kissing the inside of your wrist.

"Damn, sugar, shoulda started with that, hm? Why don't I pop in and grab it- then we can share it out here while you get your head back on."

Husband!Alastor

Headcanon:

This man. This. MAN. It can go one of two ways depending on where your relationship is with him- but in this you are married so- he would be so attentive- like. You would barely be feeling the 'oh hey, this is a lot' feeling and Al would pick up on it and knight in shining armor you away from it. Alastor just KNOWS. He has like a sixth sense when it comes to you. He is so finitly attuned to every fibre of your being that you cant even hide it from him. He just KNOWS. Like- you're in cannibal town (because be real y'all go on dates there all the time and Rosie adores you) and the children are being rowdy but 'its alright, i can manage-' oh and there's Susan- 'yes susan, we are married- no, no susan you cant see my ring im a bit worried you might try to eat my finger- No, really i insist-' oop and here comes Alastor, scooping you up with a charming grin, Rosie on his heels. 'Come along now darling, our dinner is waiting'

Scenario:

You and Alastor are in the hotels lobby, greeting guests for a party Charlie is throwing to 'encourage the inhabitants', Alastors hand is protectively on the small of your back like always. The arriving demons are a bit rowdy but nothing too bad- the real issue is the howling, rambunctious laughter coming from the bar, poor karoke all but screamed into the low quality microphone (much to Husk's annoyance), flashing strobe lights arouns the room turning the guests pink, green, blue, pink, green, blue, pink, green, blue-

"Dear?"

Careful fingers snap in front of your face- effectively lurching you out of your spiraling thoughts. You swallow thickly and look up at your husband, shaky smile plastered on your lips.

'Yes, Al?'

He frowns as he gaze flits from one eye to the other, then, his mind seemingly made up, he summons his shadow, scoops you up, and shadow travels back to you twos shared room.

"Oh lovely, this certianly wont do"

He dotes on you, rubbing your tense shoulders, kissing the crown of your head, murmuring sweet nothings to your skin as he lays you down in your shared, king bed. And later, once you're half asleep and content in his arms, he lovingly murmurs,

"No more of Charlie's so-called 'parties' for you, my sweet"

A/n: Reblogs are always encouraged and appreciated! And yes i did like my own post. I am very proud of this, i wrote it in one day WHILE (legally) high on loopy pain medicine

#hazbin alastor #alastor x reader #hazbin hotel headcanon #hazbin hotel x reader #valentino x reader #vox x reader #hazbin vox #hazbin valentino #val x reader #vox fluff #alastor hazbin #alastor hazbin hotel #alastor the radio demon #alastor #alastor headcanons #alastor imagine #alastor x you #LemonyWrites

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dilemmaontwolegs · 11 months

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Hey! Ps: love another Lie 🫶🏻 Your writing is so beautiful! I have some fiction ideas and I hope you'd like some 🥹

Imagine Charles in the middle of a race and there is a high speed crash. He's bruised and hurt and may have internal injuries but he wants to get back to the reader in the pitlane asap cause he knows the reader would lose it and as he suspects the reader is in the middle of a panic attack with everyone holding her back and on seeing him she is relieved and breaks down and he's like "you've been crying" and consoles and Hugs her in public. Ps: If you're up for it maybe it could lead to soft consoling nsfw smut?

A Little Longer

Pairing: Charles Leclerc x Fem!reader Warnings: 18+ only, crash, panic attack, injuries, smut WC: 1.3k

F1 Masterlist

You only looked away for a second, but that was all it took to miss the crash.

One moment Charles was setting best sector timings, and on the way for the fastest lap, and the next his car was spinning off the track and slamming into the tecpro barrier.

A collective gasp had rippled through the garage and you had nearly broken your neck with how quick your head snapped back to the screens. For a moment you couldn’t even see him through the dust from the gravel pit he had caught the edge of. In that moment a hundred thoughts passed through your head. In that moment a thousand questions followed, growing darker and darker as everyone waited for the dust to clear.

All ability to function was erased as you remained frozen in place, eyes fixated on the screens, unblinking, waiting for any sign of movement.

You couldn’t breathe, you couldn’t think.

You hadn’t realised you were moving until Joris grabbed your arm and you found yourself under the harsh sunlight of the pit lane instead of the garage. “Let me go,” you begged with a broken voice. “I need to get to him.”

The edge of your sight was fuzzy, the images blurry as tunnel vision set in and Joris shook your shoulders. His lips were moving but no sound penetrated the noise in your head or the whoosh of your pulse that seemed to be thump in your ears.

“I need to get back to my girlfriend.”

“This is your health we are talking about, Mr Leclerc. You need to be thoroughly checked out at the medical centre.”

“Later,” Charles argued as he limped over to the motorcycle, his hand clutching his ribs. “You don’t know her, she will be worried.”

Every bump on the path sent a jolt of pain across Charles ribs and he bit back the groan that followed. He had to focus on his breathing as he ignored the crowd watching his return to the pits, he couldn’t spare a second to think about all the people he had disappointed with his crash.

All he could think about was you.

He immediately knew he was right to worry when the motorbike puttered along the pit lane and he saw a ring of his crew trying to keep the media from seeing the scene behind them. Your cheeks were damp with your tears but your lips were cracked from the rapid breaths you were struggling to take. Joris was at your side, the relief in his eyes notable when he looked up and found Charles pushing his way through the crowd.

“Mon cœur, you’ve been crying,” Charles whispered as he pulled you into his arms, his lips brushing soft kisses over your damp cheeks.

“Charles?”

He hated how broken your voice was, broken because you had been screaming for him until your throat was raw. He held you tighter despite the protest his body made but he couldn’t stop the sharp intake he took when life returned to you and you threw your arms around his waist.

“You’re hurt!” you gasped as you leapt back and kept him at an arms width so you could inspect him. “You should be with the medics. What if you’re bleeding internally? I can’t live without you, Char.”

He chuckled softly and cupped your face so he could silence your ramblings with a kiss. “I’ll see them soon, I just need to hold you first. Please?”

You couldn’t deny him, not when his green eyes looked so blue. Lacing your fingers with his you gave him a small nod and finally noticed where you had ended up. You couldn’t remember leaving the garage and Charles draped his arm over your shoulder, turning you back to the shelter of the garage when he saw your eyes widen in realisation.

“I didn’t mean to cause a scene,” you mumbled as he closed the door to his driver room.

“I know, mon cœur,” he replied softly as his hands ran up and down your back soothingly. “I didn’t mean to scare you.”

Your trembling fingers reached for his face, tracing the creaselines his balaclava had left over his cheeks and when his eyes fluttered shut your thumb brushed away the dust that had clung to his lashes.

“I couldn’t see you.” His eyes opened at the sound of your voice. “It was the worst feeling in the world. I couldn’t see if you were okay or if…”

Charles chased away the lingering thought as he pulled you into his arms and kissed you. “I’m here, I’m here,” he reminded you as he stepped backwards, taking you with him to the couch where he sank into the soft cushions with a wince before tugging you onto his lap.

You tried to pull away as your legs settled either side of his thighs but his arms locked around your waist. “You’re hurt, baby. You need to let the medics check you.”

“Soon.” His hands followed the curve of your body until he reached the hem of your dress and they slowly began to climb once more. His palms were still warm from his gloves and the touch sent heat waves rippling across your skin as he inched higher up your thighs. “Please, let me hold you a little longer.”

It was unfair of him. Truly. He knew exactly how his touch affected you and when his thumbs teased the line of lace between your thighs you couldn’t think clearly enough to deny him. Your response was dragging the zip of his race suit down and his hands left your body only long enough to pull his sleeves down and shove the material past his waist.

Time began to work strangely as the urgency to feel each other crashed into the need to savour the moment. Your panties were pushed aside in the rush as Charles’s strong hands guided your body down to meet his and then time slowed as you stared into the gold and green eyes of the man you loved more than anything.

Whatever he saw in your eyes made him swallow deeply and bury his face in the crook of your neck, kissing his way back to your lips where he reminded you once more, “I’m here, amour.”

You returned his kiss, combing your fingers through his hair as it deepened and your hips began to move slowly. There was an awareness of his injuries that kept you from moving any faster and after a minute Charles’ impatient hands gripped your waist and set the pace for you until you forgot about the crash completely.

“I love you, Charles,” you moaned as your core clenched around him and he stole the soft sounds with his lips as he joined you in ecstasy.

“I love you too.” He sighed contentedly as he pulled you as close as possible against him, your entire front pressed to his, but the sigh turned to a groan of pain.

“Medics, now,” you ordered as you climbed off his lap and offered your hands to pull him to his feet. “No more procrastinating.”

“What we did wasn’t procrastinating, amour,” he managed to tease as he held his rib cage with one hand while he pulled his race suit back up with the other.

You groaned and ran a hand over your face. “You’re not allowed to joke until the doctors have cleared you, Charles.”

“You drive a hard bargain.” Lacing your fingers in his, he lifted your hand to his lips and kissed them before reaching for the door. “Let’s go and ease your mind, my sweet.”

#charles leclerc x you #charles leclerc x female reader #charles leclerc x reader #charles leclerc fanfic #charles leclerc imagine #f1 fanfic #f1 imagine #f1 smut #formula one imagine #formula one fanfiction #formula 1 fanfic #charles leclerc smut

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httpswritings · 1 month

Text

unable — Alexia Putellas x Reader

Warnings: mentions of past sexual abuse (not getting into detail of how that happened) and what it leads to for reader, therefore mentions of anxiety, fear to be touched, etc.

Word count: around 770

Summary: Second part of discovering true love. Alexia and reader get into a relationship together, and reader have the need to tell Alexia about her past. Alexia comforting reader.

A/N: I've already warned about these sensitive topics above, so please only read if you feel like you can.

After your conversation last week, Alexia had been educating herself about how you felt, how to behave so she could help you, and what the procedures were in case you experienced a panic attack or anything related.

Sometimes she felt awful for desiring you.

Her eyes wandered throughout your body, but she stopped when she noticed her arousal grow.

You were also struggling with your desire for her.

Craving her sexually, but being too afraid of the idea of sex was driving you mad.

Alexia was sweet. Her voice tone was delicate, and her laugh was adorable.

You noticed the way she avoided touching you, just in case you felt uncomfortable, and honestly, you were grateful she was being so considerate about it.

You two kept having conversations about different topics, including your past, to get to know each other.

As you saw Alexia interacting with friends and family, you noticed how much physical contact she held with everyone she was close to.

Some weeks passed by, and your trust in Alexia kept growing.

She didn't insist on you doing anything to or with her. There were no stolen kisses. No waist-grabbing. No second intentions.

Your girlfriend was respecting your boundaries, and for the first time in a really long time, you felt like you were being respected.

When Alexia was kissing you, her hands stayed on her waist.

It would probably look weird to someone who was not familiar with such a sensitive topic, but you appreciated Alexia's consideration, even if you knew she was craving some physical contact from you.

It wasn't until the third month of your relationship that you felt the desire to be touched while you were kissing.

The thought of it interrupted your make-out session, and you abruptly broke the kiss.

“There's nothing wrong, Ale. It's just... I want you to caress my waist, my hair, my cheek, anywhere that's not sexually intimate, while we kiss. Is that okay?”

“It's okay for me. Are you sure, princesa?”

Her face showed a worried expression, making you melt.

“I'm sure.”

You looked at your girlfriend, as you held both of her hands.

You placed her left hand on your waist, slightly reacting to the contact.

Alexia looked at you worriedly, but you assured her that you were okay.

Actually, you were a little bit uncomfortable.

Her hand stayed still, but the feeling of being touched grossed you out.

You didn't know how to explain what you were feeling.

Craving Alexia's touch, the desire to feel her hands throughout your body.

Feeling as if you wanted to throw up, your body unable to be relaxed.

Alexia noticed how your breathing increased, and she abruptly removed her hand.

“Talk to me, princesa. I need to be aware of what you're feeling so you're as comfortable as possible.”

Your shame only grew faster. Alexia was so caring and supportive of you, that you couldn't bear feeling so disgusted by her touch.

“I'm so sorry, Ale.”

She didn't understand what you meant, reassuring you that there was no rush in your process.

“No, I'm not referring to that. I feel like such a horrible person because you're trying to be as good as possible, and I can't do anything but feel disgusted. I feel like a failure. As if that person broke me when they did that to me. I'm so sorry you cannot experience a normal relationship, but—”

Alexia stood up. She wanted to get your attention as you were rambling, but she knew touching you was not an option.

“Listen to me. I love you, and I'll wait for you. I know that you feel disgusted, even when our arms are touching by accident. At first, it was hard. I'm not going to lie. But knowing that it is a common trauma response, I do not take it seriously. You're not broken, nor are you a failure. You're someone who is not only so strong, but who deserves time to heal. So again, I love you and I do not regret being your girlfriend. It's true that I'm sexually attracted to you, but that's not the only reason I love you. You're funny, caring, and intelligent. You have a great ability to memorize things; we share the same favorite book and the same love for football. I could spend hours talking with you about anything, and you know that I'm not a talkative person.”

You were left speechless by Alexia. You noticed how red her face was—not out of anger but carried by pure emotion.

You held her right hand and kissed it, unable to contain how moved you were by her words.

#alexia putellas imagine #alexia putellas x reader #alexia putellas #woso #woso imagine #woso x reader

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liveontelevision · 2 months

Text

Okay, this started as a rant about Lucifer lore and turned into an argumentative essay on why Lucifer is a bottom. My b.

18+ Smut ahead, lots of angst

•••

Here's the thing about Lucifer. He was an awesome dreamer, fell in love with Lillith, and was banished to Hell. Literally forced to see what the gift of good will can do at its worse. Unless he's made some personal contact with a sinner to get like updates about what the gift of good will did right, he had to be stuck in a depression for centuries, at least until Charlie was born. And while that would've definitely given him a new passion, he'll never feel confident in dreaming again.

With how much he dislikes sinners and what they represent, i wonder if there had to be some strain on their relationship when it came to Lillith taking control? They never really talk about if they had a fallout or if she just disappeared, but i dont think they really got divorced either.

When Lucifer looks at that family picture and winces, does he feel bad about not contacting charlie? About something he did to make lillith leave? Or maybe he feels bad about being upset at lillith for leaving in the first place? There's so much to umpack there i live for the lore.

Love Interests:

But when that comes to potential love interests in the future, Lucifer hasnt had to court anyone before like ever. Not in the circumstances that they live in a big city like Hell. So when he finally ends up catching feelings, he has no idea. People around the hotel literally need to pick up on context clues for him and have an intervention to tell him he's in love again.

Even if he hasnt seen lillith in 7 years, their relationship had to be a drastic change compared to new love. I think that his love interest would also pick it up before he does, and you would let him work at his own pace. Fuck, it is so important that he goes through this process at his own pace.

With so much strain on his past relationships with loved ones, he fully gaslights himself into thinking he doesnt deserves and isnt allowed to feel affection anymore. I hate making characters i love suffer. But i feel like in his state of mind he'd go through depressive episodes and panic attacks, maybe some night terrors. Theyed be about his past and his subconscious would essentially tell him he has feelings again, and he shouldn't act them in case he scares you away and abandons you, like heaven. Or drives you away like lillith. Or purposely blocks you out like charlie. Mans is struggling i swear. He needs some comfort.

After finally coming to terms, hes a nervous wreck about every decision he makes. He'll constantly stare in the mirror in the mornings, making sure he looks his best, would plan mental scripts before even having a conversation with you, and would become a bumbling mess just trying to make jokes out of the situation, some base level actions, like how we saw in the show. He'll manage to finally ask you out, but all he really knows how to do is profess an undying love (i feel like his confession to lillith was hella dramatic) so it was a little awkward, but still cute. And of course you said yes.

So let's say its been 5+ years since he moved into the hotel, met you and finally managed to confess his feelings. When it comes to the actual relationship? You give him reassurance and support him through his mental episodes, and laugh at his jokes and praise him for everything he does. He has such intense imposture syndrome though, that even other demons have to reassure that theres no way you dont love him with all your being. Because it is literally obvious to everyone but him.

He's pretty good at doing the romantic fluff stuff in public, he loves to make a big show out of treating you like royalty and even trying to embarrass you when you become close enough. He's always more charasmatic in public, it seems easier than doing that alone.

Not in a negative way, but Lucifer is so never to be alone with you. You take the lead a bit more in those scenarios, suggesting ideas like movies or just coming up with small talk yourself. He needs someone who'll be patient with him. Being alive for millions of years AND being left or shamed by all your loved ones during that time is literally the definition of Truama.

Of course he's been bottling all that shit up, he has no one to confide with. There's no one who's been alive and witnessed it all the way he has. So bless you for loving and caring for him even without understanding all hes been through.

You'll have some rough patches, where this emotional side locks him away from you and everyone else. It might be a few days before you see him. He'll lock himself in his office, pumping out ducks by the dozen just to keep himself from sleeping, because he's scared he'll have night terrors if he feels asleep. He's in a constant loop;

"what if i fucked up?"

"what if i try to talk about it and then they realize how bad i fucked up?"

"what if that's enough of a reason for them to leave me?"

"what if i scare them away?"

"what if that fucks this up?"

"what if i fucked up.. Again..?"

After he leaves his office, youre excited to see him out and about, but you cant make a big deal out of it. You have to speak to him calmly, make sure he's physically okay before talking to him about his thought process. It might take awhile, but he'll eventually trust you enough to open up. And of course it'll never be bad enough for you to leave him, he's just struggling.

Physical Contact:

It takes him an even longer time to become physical with you. He hasnt been intimate for over a decade at this point, but as soon as he becomes comfortable with little affections like hand holding, cuddling, wrapping his arms around your waist, and kissing? Hoo boy, he melts after your first kiss. It couldve been even a small peck and he would still become a nervous wreck just trying to ask for more.

He'll ask for physical touch more than provide it at first. You'll give him a quick kiss and he'll look up at you super eager just like, "another?" He'll grow into tastful pda's, linking arms, quick hugs and smooches, holding hands all that.

He becomes putty in your hand when you're alone though. You'll nudge him to lean against your shoulder or even lay his head in your lap while youre lounging or watching movies. He becomes so relaxed in your presence, that you'll want to suddenly peck him just to see his suddenly flustered reaction.

You'd give him massages that he would always be hesistant over. He was always a little nervous that he wasnt giving enough to you, but you were quick to assure him that wasnt the case. You'd straddle his hips while giving him a slowww massage. It starts with light touches, tracing your fingers over his shoulder blades and spine. You'd trace your fingers over his chest when you would cuddle too, depending on the position. Or stroke his back sweetly. It was enough of a distraction to keep his mind occupied, away from any spiraling thoughts he might be having.

He purrs. Convince me that he doesnt purr. (You cant)

Being secluded for so long probably means that he doesnt fly as much as he used to. It was probably a passion of his, and he was especially delighted to share it with lillith and charlie.

So during those 7 years he barely flew, he also didnt take care of his wings. I feel like theyre something to be summoned, so they arent constantly tucked into his back. You'd basically scold him sometimes to just let you clean his wings.

You'd do it in like a spring-type bathhouse that Lucifer would have in his castle somehow. It was one of the first intimate moments he's experienced in years, so he was generally going insane. Feeling your hands and a little comb rake through the feathers on his giant wings? You'd have to tap his shoulder sometimes to keep him from falling asleep to the relaxation alone. After the first time, the water you used was pretty dirty and he had a lot of loose feathets that were combed out. Damn, he needed this.

Intimacy:

After awhile, you sit down and would have a discussion about being intimate in bed. Lucifer would be absolutely nervous about overstepping by asking this, (even though you've been together for about a year at this point). He would use his mental scripts and basically practice what he wanted to say.

It would mainly be him saying he wants to do this because he loves you and youve done so much for him that he wants to give back to you in this way. It would consist of him saying its okay if you dont want to, or if you ever want to stop to just say so. But of course you want to, how could you not?

It would start slow, he actually tries taking the lead in this specific situation. He would kiss you first, his lips trembling at the thought that this is actually happening. Feeling his nerves, you'd cup his face and stroke his cheeks with your thumbs lightly. That will help him ease up enough to start letting the passion take over more.

He'd become more confident in slipping his tongue into your mouth and placing his hands on your hips to pull you closer to him. Lucifer would get lost in the moment, pulling you to straddle his lap as he kissed and licked and bit his way across both your shoulders and down to the softeness of your breast. After leaning back to look at the damage his eyes would become increasingly wide, looking up at you with a flustered expression. Seeing you losing it as much as he was, gave him enough courage to keep up at it.

He would almost hesistantly take a hold of your breasts and would massage them softly, running his thumbs across your nipples and becoming absolutely delighted at the reaction you gave. The adrenaline from the pleasure would make you start grinding against his lap, which would make lucifer's hands on your hips pull away for a moment and make his breath stutter. Lucifer would look you up and down as if he didnt know what to do next, studying your body with darting eyes. You'd press a small kiss on his forehead before guiding his hands back onto your hips with yours, keeping your eyes on him the entire time.

"Are you okay, Luci?" He would gulp before nodding his head and turning ridiculously red across his face, maybe from the idea of what was to come, maybe just from your voice alone. You'd keep your hands ontop of his at your hips as you'd keep moving, letting out breathy moans. He would be holding his breath without realizing, an absolute nervous wreck just from the view.

He would already be hard just from the previous make out session, so this would cause him to lean his back against the bed, his strength giving out. You'd keep up at it, feeling his hips jolt up to meet yours at times.

He was a sweaty, twitching mess in front of you and you hated to admit how much that excited you.

His scripted plan was immediately forgotten, but he was quick to remember that he wanted to please you.

He'd snap out of his state of intense pleasure, to carefully switch positions, him looking over you with your back against the bed.

You both discuss it, of course, attempting to set boundaries before hand. Even just the tender discussion would get him riled up. So he'd lean foward and kiss you again, showing off his forked tongue before peppering kisses down your entire body, until he was close enough to let his hot breath heat up your folds.

You'd feel his nervous breath on you before delving in. He would be hesistant of course, but would be quick to get used to your entrance after running his tongue across your entirety multiple times. Lucifer loves providing pleasure this way, so his brain immediately knew what to do once the nerves past. He was quick to take a tight hold onto your thighs to keep you in place as he entered you with his demonic lengthy tongue. He would look up at you as he sort of aimlessly dug around at first, waiting for a reaction. Once he'd see you dip your head back with a muffled moan, he would close his eyes to focus all his attention to that one spot. He'd reach his thumb around to circle and massage your clit that he would find far too quickly. You'd arch your back and try to get more friction against his tongue, but it's easy to forget that he is quite literally the strongest being in Hell. You weren't going anywhere.

He'd love feeling your hands in his hair and would absolutely lose it feeling you pull hard when he'd hit just the right spot. As soon as he set a steady thythm and was hearing your voice become more unhinged, he'd speed up to an extent that you didn't realize was possible after going for so long. You discussed cumming before and he made it very clear that he was okay with you finishing on his face. Fuck, he wanted it. You still warned him, moaning out his name to get his attention, "I-I'm almost there- K-Keep doing that.. like that..! Luci-" you'd almost direct him though the whole process, but were quick to become a moaning mess unable to communicate with words. You'd reach your limit and he would let you buck up into his face this time, loosening his grip on your thighs. He'd pull away after licking you clean, sending overstimulated pleasure across your entire body, with a line of your juices following his tongue as he lifted his head. He would pant with his tongue still sticking out of his mouth, and even through hazy eyes you loved seeing his demonic tongue and thinking about how it just drove you to climax.

Things would switch up again, and you'd sit him against the back of the bedframe. you'd have another quick discussion before seating yourself slowly on his length, which had been throbbing for any contact since the night started. The first few times, he'd do his best not to cum immediately. He hadn't been touched like this in a while, after all. You'd only begin to move once you made sure he was okay since his struggle was written all over his face.

The moment you began to keep a steady space, he would jut his hips upwards, becoming needy to feel this sensation he hadn't felt in over a decade. The first time didn't last long. It was sweet, and he would constantly moan out your name and babble on about how much he loves you. The entire time, you'd be praising him through every move until he was going too fast for you to get a sentence out.

He'd cum inside of you, another previously discussed topic. You essentially had to beg to convince him it was okay. You'd collapse onto his chest, a position he didnt see often. While the two of you always cuddled, you were so focused on making sure he was comfortable, Lucifer realized you didnt often get the chance to just relax on top of him. So after realizing that? Aftercare was amazing.

He'd let you sit with him inside you for a while, before pulling you off and immediately cleaning you up. Some nights, when he felt especially dominant, he would lap up his own cum from your incredibly sensitive cunt. He would swallow some of it, but was mainly pushing anything that dripped out back into your entrance.

After cleaning you up, he would wiggle his way back underneath you and pull you onto his chest, enjoying taking care of you the way you took care of him.

After the first night, lucifer would be much more confident. He'd have that healthy glow, but would be more assertive during meetings, more communicative and wouldnt shut others out as often. It really helped him realize how much you gave to him, and he was determined to give all that and more back to you.

#hazbin hotel #hazbin #hazbin hotel smut #lucifer hazbin #lucifer hazbin hotel #lucifer magne #lucifer morningstar x you #lucifer x reader smut #lucifer morningstar #hazbin lucifer

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sturniolosreads · 3 months

Note

Dating Matt but Nick and Chris make you stay over at their house because when Matt’s at your place they don’t anyone to drive them places

UBER

Matt Sturniolo x Fem!reader

Today was Sunday, I had just gotten back from a long travel day and was driving to my boyfriend, Matts house. Matt was my lifesaver, we met when we were 14; he saw me sitting on the floor near the girls restroom when he had come out of class to go to the toilet.

I was sat crying, going into a panic attack because I couldn't do the work that my maths teacher gave me, he rushed up to me, held me and comforted me despite having no idea who was.

After he calmed me down, he helped me figure out the work and told me that he often experienced anxiety too. When lunch came around, he introduced me to his triplet brothers, Nick, and Chris. From that day on, all four of us were inseparable.

In junior year, we had both developed a crush on each other; he put flowers in my locker with a note asking me out on Valentine's day, and who was I to say no? So, we began to go on dates, and on the 3rd date he asked me if he could be my boyfriend.

Three years later, we were in a healthy and happy relationship. We had organised a movie night with me, Matt, Nick, Chris, and Nate so that Nick and Chris werent 3rd and 4th wheeling. I got out of my car after finally arriving to the triplets' house and grabbed my keys out of my pocket.

Matt had given me a key to their house when they moved to L.A a year ago so that i could let myself in, sometimes i would have trouble sleeping at night so i would drive over to the triplets house, Matt knew I did it to help me sleep at night so it never bothered him when he would wake up to me cuddled up at the side of him.

lunlocked the door and stepped into the house, Matt must have heard me pulling up because as soon as stepped foot in the doorway, he nearly knocked me over with a bone crushing hug.

" missed you baby, how was Boston?" he asked, his speech slightly muffled due to his head being nuzzled into my neck. I laughed, kissing his cheek

"it was good, I missed you too. How have things been while I was away?”

He groaned, pulling away from me *hell, imagine having to babysit two 20-year-old toddlers." Nick walked up from behind him *just because you have to have everything clean all the time Mr.

Perfect" he rolled his eyes pulling me in for a hug

"it's good to have you back y/n, this moron hasn't stopped whining since we dropped you off at the airport." | laughed again at the brothers' antics.

"you guys need to come next time, I bumped into Marylou at the store, she said that the next time I go to Boston I need to drag you by the hair to come with me." I told them, they smiled.

"Were planning to go next month, you'll be coming with us of course" Matt spoke. "Hurry up guys I wanna start the movie!" Chris whined from upstairs. I rolled my eyes playfully at his dramatics, walking up the stairs with Matt and Nick following my lead.

Chris got up and ran to me as I came up the stairs. He jumped up and wrapped his legs around me like a monkey (like he did to nick in the vlog ages ago) as I let out a strained groan. Matt laughed and pried Chris off me. I giggled a bit and hugged Chris normally, despite there only being a few months of an age difference between me and the triplets, Chris was like a little brother to me.

He could be the biggest nuisance, but that was what made him so loveable. Matt never had a problem with us being close because he knew that we never thought about each other that way, and he knew that me and Chris were strictly platonic. " missed you sis he said, a toothy grin on his face as he pulled away from the hug. « missed you too kid, what are we watching?" | asked him, and he suddenly got more excited "we bought the new ninja turtles movie"

TIME SKIP

We spent around 2 hours on the couch together, watching the movie and eating our weight in Wingstop. Nate left around half way through, saying that he didn't want to wake up his mom by coming home too late. Once the movie was over, I

#I'm gonna head home guys, I'm exhausted from travelling" I said to them. Matt stood up after me

*I'lI take you home, I'll probably just end up staying at yours anyway. Chris immediately protested.

“No matt, I have to go to a meeting tomorrow morning, and I need you to drive me" he whined.

"I'm not an uber Chris, either walk or order one." he whined again "y/n, please stay over. I hate taking Ubers, they are too expensive" nick then decided to join the conversation. "I also need to go to target tomorrow” he spoke in a tone that said ‘you better drive me.’

laughed at their desperateness "why don't you guys just hurry up and get your licence? But fine, I'll stay over if matt is okay with it" I turned to look at matt who was standing behind me, silently asking him if he was okay with me sleeping in his room for the night.

"of course, I'm sorry about them" he smiled apologetically at me "it's okay, your bed is comfier anyway" | smiled, running away into his room, and jumping on the bed.

I heard him speaking to Chris, asking him what time he needed to be at the meeting. a few minutes later, I smiled at him as he came through the door of his room, shutting it behind him. "I'm gonna go for a shower and then I'II come to bed" | told him.

He smiled and nodded as he opened his drawer to take out a pair of sweatpants to sleep in "okay, are you just gonna sleep in one of my shirts? I have your spare underwear in my drawer." | nodded at him "yeah, I'II be like 15 minutes, and I'II be done" he nodded.

I went into the bathroom and closed the door. I took a quick shower, before getting out and wrapping the towel around me and opening the door.

I walked over to the drawer that I kept all my spare things in for when I stayed here and grabbed a pair of underwear along with the t-shirt matt had left out for me. I slipped them on, before getting under the duvet and putting my phone on charge.

Matt smiled at me, pulling me in to him as he put his phone down. "Goodnight baby" he spoke, kissing my forehead "Goodnight love" I buried my face into his chest, falling asleep in minutes.

A/n: sorry this is so short, but first one shot done. I'm so scared to publish this 😭

#chris sturniolo #christopher sturniolo #matt sturniolo #nick sturniolo #nicolas sturniolo #sturniolo triplets #sturniolo fanfic #sturniolo imagine #sturniolo smut #sturniolo x reader

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mockerycrow · 5 months

Note

super big congratulations on 4k!! you deserve it <3

i was wondering if you could write a gn! reader x price with the prompt "Hey, it's okay, I got you. You're alright, you're okay." it doesn't matter if it's platonic or romantic; whatever feels best for you!!

Thank you so much and congratulations!

YOU’RE ALIVE (Price x GN!Reader) — 4K CELEBRATION

[WARNINGS; Car accident, implied situationship w/ Price, moderate injuries, flashbacks, near panic attack, open ending.]

YOU DON’T REMEMBER the events that lead up to you in a hospital bed, a cast fitted around your arm, a brace on your knee, a bandage around your skull, and only God knows how many stitches and bandages in random assortments. You can’t forget the numeral wires and tubes attached to you, too. Oh, and the ear-bleeding beeping. John sits next to you in a chair—he’s your… friend, of sorts. You aren’t really sure what to call what you two have going on.

You look at him, slumped in the visitors chair he’s pulled up beside your bed, his arms crossed and his legs spread; his neck is bent at an awkward angle and you know it’s going to ache whenever he awakens. John looks quite tired—he’s looked tired and stressed the entire time he’s been in the hospital room with you. Stressing over you, like a worried hu—…. you shouldn’t think about that. Suddenly the ceiling looks far more appealing to stare at, rather than the beautiful gentleman who is willingly staying at your bedside, despite your exhausted attempts to have him get some proper rest.

You glance over at him—envious of how he’s able to sleep right now. Hm. Honestly, you know John would be awake with you if he had the energy. The only reason why you’re awake is your stitches itch, and the only reason why he’s asleep is because you did not wake up for four days after you passed out at the scene of a car accident you were apparently in; an accident you don’t remember too well. You barely even remember what you had for breakfast that morning; cereal of some kind, maybe? Eggs? You don’t know.

“You were on the way to work, love.” You remember John telling you. You remember the tense expression, the firmness of his eyebrows. The frown of his lip, the way he amusingly resembled a quokka in the moment. You were also apparently on the phone with John at the same time, so whatever happened, he heard all of it. The details from your own memory are fuzzy—your doctors concluded your amnesia is temporary, so they gave you the choice of remembering it yourself or having them tell you. You opted in for the first option.

It was coming back to you in bits and pieces. Small moments where you feel the hairs on the back of your neck standing up, you think you hear glass shattering in the distance; your heart begins to race at different moments. You aren’t sure what to make of it—until now.

“I’m not excited for this meeting.” You whined, your eyes were glued to the road. Your phone is bluetooth connected to your car’s system so you can talk with John and have both of your hands on the wheel. “I’m sure it’ll be fine, honey. Surely it’s just about budgets like last month.” John hums through the speakers of your car. You sigh, turning on your windshield wipers as it’s pouring out, obscuring your vision a bit.

“It’s raining pretty hard, how do the roads look?” He asks, a bit of rustling coming from John’s end. He’s probably reading a book or looking out from the curtains. “I’m driving slower than normal, visibility isn’t the greatest..” You admit, letting out a breath, slowing the car down once again. “..I was sliding a bit, thinking it’s time I get some new wheels.” John hums in agreement. “Definitely. Please be safe, love.” You chuckled glancing around the road, furrowing your eyebrows when the double yellow line seems to fade. “I’m trying my best, Jo—“

You’re suddenly being jostled around violently after a big impact from your front, your seatbelt digging into your skin as something launches your car off to the side. “SHIT—“ You scream, attempting to stop the car, but the rain causes you to slide across the road. Something hits you from the back and you feel you physically feel yourself lift in your seat—and then you’re fading in and out. You wake up with wetness against your face, pain in your ribs, your arm, your skull—

You let out a choked sob as there’s ringing in your ears and your eyes refuse to focus—but you can tell you’re upside down. You see a pair of legs sprinting towards you through your broken side window, and you aren’t really register what’s happening. You blink and the person is try to pry the door open frantically. You still don’t hear them; it’s almost like a silent movie.

The door gives, the flipped car jostling from the force used to pry it open. You blink and fuck—It’s John. His eyes are wide and his jaw is tense, shaky hands. He’s grabbing the sides of your head, forcing you to keep your head still—his lips are moving but you can’t hear him. You sob and you try to reach up to touch him, and he lets you. Your eyes look at your own hand as it’s caked in your own blood, causing you to inhale shakily. This isn’t happening. The pain starts sitting you harder, a pulsing in the side of your head.

“Hey—“ John’s voice suddenly cuts through and you blink, and you’re back in the hospital room. You’re breathing hard and fast, causing your chest to ache more than it already does. His hands are cupping your cheeks like he was in the flipped car, and you let out a panicked sob; your machines make loud beeping noises in retaliation. “Hey, it’s okay, I got you. You’re alright, you’re okay..” John quickly murmurs, his thumbs gently wiping your tears away. “Focus on my voice, okay? You’re alright. You’re in the hospital, love.”

You sniffle and nod, shakily inhaling once again as you try to calm your panicked lungs and struggling heart, your good hand coming up and gently grasping his wrist. “I-I was flipped over—“ You choke out, which John quickly meets with soft shushing and a kiss between your eyebrows. “I know, honey. I know. I got you, you’re safe now.” You nod, choking out another whimper as you lean into his touch—because John’s right. He has you; you’re safe, he’s the one who got to you first. You’re sure you’ll want to ask him how he found you so fast later, but all you want to do right now and feel him and hear him. Because you’re alive.

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inuiiwonderland · 1 month

Text

Twisted captivity

Chapter 1

Twst third years x fem reader

A/n: here is the first chapter of my new series “twisted captivity” !! Again this is a yandere series so it will have some dark themes! Also, the first couple chapters will be more on the short side since It has been a while since I wrote anything and also because of my major writers block and motivation for writing. So I’m taking baby steps rn lol. But I genuinely wanna write this since it’s been on my mind for MONTHS! So enough about my rambling I really hope you guys enjoy this!

Words:766

You walked down the long hallway as Crowley explained to you the rules and things you would be in charge of.

“Since your father told me you’re a researcher, you will be in charge of writing down every detail and interaction you have with the mers and also help us understand more about them and their biology!”

You simply nodded, still not believing that he has REAL mermaids and mermen’s in his care.

“You will also be in charge of feeding them, cleaning and taking care of their tanks! Though do be careful, some of them can be very wary and may attack when they feel threatened!”

“Ah that’s…good to know”

“Great! Now it’s time for you to come meet them so follow me” You followed him as he led you down a long hallway before walking through a double door which led you to a giant lab. In there you can see a big window as people rush in all sorts of directions.

“This is our lab! Here we run all our experiments and test” Your eyes grow wide as you see a couple of people roll in a big cart with an equally large tank which has a mermaid inside.

The poor thing was thrashing around in the tank as she clawed on the glass. The tank must have been made with really strong glass since it didn’t crack or break by how hard the poor thing was banging on it. The cart was rolled to another room, which you did NOT want to know about.

“Don’t worry she’ll be fine”

Something tells you she wouldn’t….

“Come follow me! I’ll show you the less aggressive ones first”

Okay now you were slowly starting to regret this

Maybe you should’ve stayed home and made yourself a good meal as you watched your favorite show. But no, you decided to show up instead.

What if this is all illegal? What if the government or whoever doesn’t even know such a thing exists?! Or maybe Crowley is working for the government?!

As you begin to panic, you accidentally bump into said man as he comes to a stop.

“Sor-“

“We’re here!” You step aside and you stare in awe as you are met with a beautiful sight.

The place looked absolutely gorgeous. It definitely didn’t look like it belonged in a research facility.

The place had a huge waterfall along with some beautiful trees and huge rocks and caves. You noticed a bridge in the center of it all and it had beautiful long vines surrounding it.

This definitely looked like it came from a fairy tale

“Welcome to the heartslabyul enclosure!” He says with a big smile.

“This place is so…”

“Amazing right? I’m glad you think so because I spent millions on this place!”

“Hey Crowley!” You both turned around to see a man with black and white hair. The man looked annoyed as he glared down at Crowley.

“Ah! Crewel! Nice seeing you here today, say why are you here?” The man scowled.

“I work here you idiot”

“Hey now that’s not a good way to talk to your boss! I have a new worker here with me and you can’t make it seem like calling me an idiot is okay!” Crowley says as crewel turns to look at you.

“You should still run while you have the chance” He says which causes Crowley to gasp.

You just awkwardly laugh as crewel and Crowley continue to bicker back and forth. You step away from the two as you decide to explore the area a bit more.

You walk down the bridge and to a small path that leads you to another beautiful part of the area. As you continued exploring, you didn’t notice the pair of eyes that peeked from under one of the lily pads.

Red eyes followed you as you continued to walk down the path.

Weird….never seen her around before

He watches you like a hawk before quickly ducking down as you turn around.

You eye the water curiously

“Weird….could’ve sworn I heard something” As you were about to walk a little closer towards the water, the sound of your name being called made you stop. You look up to see Crowley waving at you from the bridge.

“Come! I have more things to discuss with you in my office!” You just nodded but before you left, you looked back at the water one last time before walking away and to where crowley was.

As you leave, the boy slowly comes back up with curious eyes.

She looks nice….

Again sorry for such a short chapter😓 but as I said, baby steps!

Taglist: @ruisann @roseapov @0ffth3rec0rd @anunholyabomination

Ask if you wanna be put on the taglist!

Also! Reader will have more like a mother/older sister relationship with the 1st and 2nd years! I will explain more as the story goes:)

#inuiiwonderland🤍#twisted wonderland #twisted wonderland x reader #yandere twisted wonderland #twst x female reader #twst x reader #yandere twst #yandere themes #disney twst #twst crowley #twst crewel #twst heartslabyul #twisted wonderland disney #twst imagines #twst #twisted wonderland x fem reader

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isuckatwritingsobenice · 6 months

Note

hello! I would like a Dazai Osamu bsd headcanons, where he considers the reader his reason for living… if it's not too much trouble! ♡

A/N: Of course!! Thank you so much for this request, it’s so cute! I'm definately going to expand on this in the future.

Warnings: Dazai being Dazai, mentions of panic attacks, mentions of PTSD, implied smut but no detail, stalking tendencies

Navigation!! // Masterlist

Dazai really never thought he would meet anyone that would make him want to live

he felt like his life was almost meaningless

like the world was too messed up for him to want to live in, to him there was no point

But then he meets you, it's at the train station and you're buying flowers for your mother

she's sick and you're seeing her while you can

you two make small talk and Dazai mentions where he works, it piques your interest

He doesn't talk much after that, and mainly because the train is close to leaving so Dazai needs to take his seat

But that doesn't stop him from thinking of you, and after days, almost a month, of not seeing you but not forgetting you, he caves and begins to search

He finds your name, address, place of work, where you were born, everything

He starts showing up at places you would be near, and he catches glimpses of you

it seems like you're genuinely a good person, like you radiate this warmth off you

he enjoys it, he craves it

fast forward a few months after Dazai's weird stalking, he unloads onto you while he's drunk

You're walking him back to his apartment

He starts breaking down in an alley way, his bandages coming undone and he's frantic, you've never seen him like this before

he's about to rip his hair out, he's struggling to breathe, he's panicking, PTSD has him in a choke hold as of right now

Some people also panic when things like this happen, other people just wait it out

You were a mix between the two; internally panicking but also waiting it out

You were unsure if you should touch him, so you settled for talking to him instead, with a slight hold on his arms

He had sat against a wall, quietly talking to himself with his head in his hands, his eyes were still frantic, so you tried your best to be careful

"Dazai?" You called, and he heard you, his shaking calmed after that

"relax, just breathe. Everything's okay."

He couldn't have done more. He wanted to talk, he really did, but there was a lot going through his mind.

The two of you sat in silence for a while, just with each other

Finally, he spoke up

"Y/n?"

"Yes Dazai?"

" I wanna go home."

The walk to his apartment was quieter, and a bit slower too, but when he opened the front door, you didn't expect for him to pull you inside too, let alone into a hug

"Thank you." He whispered, you almost didn't hear him

"Please don't. It was nothing Dazai, really." You whisper back, you can feel the anxiousness coming off of him

"Can you stay the night?" He asks, pulling back a bit to look you in the eyes. He's pleading with you, almost desperate, but also hopeful.

"Sure." You say back, a small smile on your face. You want him to know you're okay too.

He doesn't scare you. He realizes this now.

His lips find yours quickly, in a kiss that he didn't intend of leading to more, but he can't get enough of you and you don't want him to leave

That night, he goes to bed with a new reason, a reason to live

a reason to love you

#dazai fluff #yandere dazai #dazai imagines #dazai headcanons #dazai smut #bungou stray dogs dazai #dazai osamu #bsd dazai #dazai x reader #bungou stray dogs #osamu dazai #osamu dazai x reader

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alotofpockets · 2 months

Text

Lost & found | Katie McCabe x Reader

Summary: Where Jake loses his favourite stuffed animal, and Katie helps you through a panic attack.

A/n: Part of the Mini Mate Universe

Woso masterlist | Words: 1.6k

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Over the past few months you had gone over to Beth and Viv’s place for dinner at least once a week. Jake loved his new aunties, and you enjoyed spending time with the couple and the many guests they seemed to have over at all times. Beth and Viv in turn were also enjoying having you and Jake around, you fitted right in with all Katie’s teammates, and well they just all loved Jake.

Today you would have brunch at their house, along with a few other girls from the team. Katie texted you she needed to finish up some things and head your way in 30 minutes, just enough time for Jake to finish his Bluey episode, you thought while you finished packing up his bag.

When Katie arrived, she greeted you with a kiss, “Hi baby, are you ready to go?” Jake’s show was still playing in the background, but it was long forgotten by the boy when he heard Katie’s voice. The sound of his tiny footsteps running your way made the both of you smile and look into the hallway. “Kawie!” You didn’t think you would ever grow tired of his excitement for your girlfriend, or the way he pronounced her name. “Hi mini mate, I’ve missed you!” She picks him up and twirls him around. “Let me just turn everything off, and I will meet you at the car?”

Each time you were heading somewhere with Katie, she insisted on driving to your house, and head to wherever you were going together. You had told her many times that you could just meet her at Beth and Viv’s, but Katie kept insisting to go together. Usually you took your car since Jake’s seat was in there, but now you walk outside and see Katie putting Jake into her car. “Wait, why are you putting him in your car? He needs his car seat.” Katie stepped to the side to show you the brand new car seat installed in the back of her car, and you couldn’t believe your eyes. Katie ruffled your son’s hair before closing the door softly. “What do you think?” You were still a bit shocked. “I think it looks great, but you really didn’t have to do that.” Katie takes your hand and leads you to her car. “I know I didn’t have to, but I’m in this for the long run, and I want to be able to go somewhere with the three of us and not make you drive every time.” You place a soft kiss on her lips, “You are the best, I love you.”

When you arrived it didn’t take long for Jake to run off to Laura who was playing with Myle. You loved knowing that any one of Katie’s teammates would look out for your boy when you were in a group setting, and that even though as a mom you would still keep checking in, you could also let it go a bit, knowing that he was cared for.

You spend about an hour talking with the group of girls before Beth said that she was going to take the dogs for a walk. Since the weather was so nice, everyone decided to tag along. You headed to the little beach nearby, where the dogs could run around freely. Beth and Viv walked up front, with two dogs running ahead of them, you and Katie followed with Jake on Katie’s neck, and the group of you was followed by a giggling Laura and Vic pushing each other around. It was interesting to see the different dynamics between the girls surrounding you, but you loved all of their company.

When you got back to Beth and Viv’s you all had lunch together, before you made the short drive back to your house. Katie knew you were in need of some one on one time with her, so she had asked Linda if she would watch Jake during his nap and the rest of the afternoon. It wasn’t until you had tucked Jake into his bed with Katie and Linda talking downstairs, that you realised that Jake had lost his stuffed bunny. You found out because Jake started loudly crying. “Mommy, me want Benny!” He screamed at the top of his lungs. “Shh, it’s okay kiddo, Mommy is going to go look for Benny.” You held the boy in your arms as the tears rolled over his cheeks. The women downstairs had heard Jake’s screams, and Katie came running with a different stuffed animal that she found amongst Jake’s toys. “Hi buddy.” She says sitting down next to you and while letting her hands go through your son’s hair. “I have a Mister Bear here, who really needs some cuddles. Do you think you can give him some cuddles?” Jake took the bear with a little hesitation. “Good job kiddo, you’re making Mister Bear very happy.” You say, wiping his tears away. “Come on, nap time. Linda will be right downstairs if you need anything.” With a kiss to his forehead, you leave his room.

Once you close his bedroom door, you start pacing the hallway. Katie takes your hand, “Let’s get downstairs, baby.” You continue your pacing when you get to the living room. “Why can’t I remember where I last saw his bunny?” It was frustrating that you could not picture the last time you saw Jake holding Benny. “It’s okay, baby, I will text Viv and ask her to look at their place, and we will go to the beach and check there. We’re going to find Benny, okay?”

You made your way over to the beach, the route passed Viv and Beth’s so if they would find the bunny you could go there instead. Viv texted before you passed their exit that they couldn’t find the bunny anywhere in the living room, hallway or backyard, where Jake had been today. So, the beach was your last hope.

After walking every inch of the luckily rather small beach back and forth for the third time, you plopped down on the sand. The frustrations and emotions were getting the better of you as you started crying. “What am I going to do? Benny is his favourite stuffed animal.” Your thoughts started spiralling. How were you going to be able to explain this to your toddler? You could already see the pout and the sadness behind his eyes. Your breathing sped up until it was getting hard for you to breathe. Katie noticed what was happening right away, and sat down in front of you. “Hey baby, look at me.” Your vision was blurry, but you turned your head in the direction of her voice. “It’s okay, everything is going to be okay. Can you take a deep breath in for me?” You tried to take a big breath, but after inhaling for a second you were struggling again. “That was good, let’s try another one.” She took one of your hands and put it over her heart. “Can you feel my heartbeat, baby?” You nodded weakly. “Okay good, focus on my heart beating, and try to take another deep breath in.”

Focussing on Katie’s heartbeat helped you to stay grounded, and breath by breath, your breathing started to get more regular. “What happened?” You ask while wiping away your tears. “I think you just had a panic attack.” You stand up and start ridding yourself of sand. “Take it easy baby, let’s take a moment.” Katie tries to make you take a break. “No need, we need to find this bunny. I already ruined our afternoon, I don’t want to ruin it further by not coming home with Jake’s bunny.” Katie is quick to her feet and places her hands on your shoulder. “You did not ruin our afternoon. I will gladly search over this beach ten more times, if that means I got to spend time with you, and make Jake happy.”

Before you could respond to Katie’s kind words, you were interrupted by her phone ringing. “Hey Viv, you’re on speaker, y/n is with me.” Katie said as she picked up the call. “Ah that’s great. I have good news, we found Benny.” You couldn’t believe it and fell into Katie’s arms. “Thank you so much Viv. That is so good to hear.” Katie wrapped her arm around you, and placed a kiss onto your forehead. “Yeah thanks Viv. We’re at the beach now, so we’ll come pick it up on the way, if that’s okay with you.” Viv agrees, “Yeah, just one thing. The reason we couldn’t find it before was because Myle is the one that found him, and he might have a severed limb now. We are so sorry, y/n.” You shake your head, just happy that the beloved stuffed animal was found. “Don’t worry about it Viv, I’m just glad I don’t have to tell Jake that the whole bunny is gone.”

Once you got back home with the bunny and his loose arm, Linda was quick to say that she could fix him. Linda got to work right away, and got done just in time, as you heard Jake waking up upstairs. She handed you the bunny, and you made your way upstairs. “Hi Jakey.” Your son looked up at you with big hopeful eyes. “You won’t believe the adventure Benny has been on today.” You say as you reveal the stuffed animal. “Mommy found Benny!” You had never seen the boy wake up so quickly. “Actually auntie Viv did, because little Benny went on an adventure with Myle today.” You made up a story about Benny and Myle in hopes the boy would forget about the sadness of losing his stuffy, and by the smile on his face, you think you were doing a pretty good job.

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#mini mate universe #katie mccabe #katie mccabe x reader #katie mccabe imagine #woso #woso imagine #woso imagines #woso x reader #arsenal x reader #arsenal wfc #arsenal wfc imagine #arsenal wfc x reader #awfc imagine #awfc x reader

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blues824 · 6 months

Note

I have read a lot of your scenario works, and I wanna know: How would the TWST Overblot react to a reader who has a service animal for something like Anxiety? Am curious on who sees the service animal as a good boi/girl lol

Gender-neutral reader who has anxiety and animal.

Riddle Rosehearts

He knows about service animals, and he knows about medical benefits that they can bring to a person

When he sees that you have a service animal, he knows not to touch it or speak to it without permission

That being said, the first time he saw your animal without you accompanying it, his mind leapt to the worst conclusion

He quickly followed to see you having a panic attack, and your animal had you lay down flat against the floor so that it could lie on top of you

Riddle quickly went to your side and started leading you in breathing exercises while taking your hand in his to help ground you.

When you had recovered a bit, Riddle was relieved that your animal was trained so well to handle your panic attacks

Leona Kingscholar

He definitely does not like that little mutt being so close to you, especially whenever you come over to Savanaclaw

Now, he has met people who require or have service animals, and he knows that he’s not supposed to touch them or speak to him, and it’s not even like he wants to in the first place

However, when your animal jumped through the mirror and ran towards him without you, he knew something was wrong

He ran after the canine, praying to whatever being was listening up in the heavens that you were alright, when he saw you curled up in the fetal position and hyperventilating

Your animal made you lay down flat and just plopped itself right on top of you, placing its head on the valley of your chest

Leona did not know what to do, so he kind of just sat next to you until you calmed down. You bet he took you to the infirmary once you recovered, though

Azul Ashengrotto

The entire trio had to take a few courses in order to open up the Mostro Lounge, and service animals were allowed in the establishment

There weren’t too many students who needed or had a service animal, so you will have to excuse the questions he has about the animal

Now, during one shift, your animal burst into his office and started tugging at his pant leg, and from what you had told him, his mind assumed the worst

He ran faster than he had ever run before just to get to Ramshackle and to see you hyperventilating and crying

Your canine companion went up to you and leaned against you so that you could cling to them, but when you saw that Azul sat next to you, you clung to him instead

It took a few moments to calm down, but when you did Azul did not think anything different of you. He has had a few panic attacks himself

Jamil Viper

He actually doesn’t know a lot about service animals, mainly because he has grown up around the Asim family and no one has a service animal in that household

But, he feels as though it’s rude to ask about it, so he does his own research at the library in his limited free time

That is how he knew to follow your animal when it showed up unaccompanied and seemingly worried

You were in the corner of the Ramshackle living room, curled up in a ball and crying while breathing rapidly

Jamil, being concerned, knelt down to your level and tried to get you to snap out of it and calm down by grabbing you by your shoulders and talking to you

When you were alright, he asked what happened and will then try and keep you away from what caused the attack to begin with

Vil Schoenheit

He knows a few things about service animals, as he has had co-stars who have one on-set for their stage-fright

When he sees that you have one, he is a bit curious as to why you have one, so he will politely ask questions about your animal

There was one day where he was in his room, making something for Epel to wear, when your animal opened the door and started tugging his dorm robe in a certain direction

Because he didn’t see you anywhere, he followed with haste to find you in your dormitory, holding your head in your hands and rocking back and forth

Vil was worried, kneeling down and taking your hand in his. Your animal had a similar idea as it went between your legs and laid its head on your stomach, looking up at you

Once you had recovered, Vil was angrily demanding the names of who set you off in such a frenzy

Idia Shroud

Bro knows nothing about service animals except for the fact that he is not supposed to touch or pet them without permission

When he discovers that you have one, he panics because he might have been offensive to you in your online calls with each other

He might benefit from a service animal with the way he is having a panic attack while you are trying to calm him down

One fateful day, your service animal came to him in a panic without you, and from what he learned on the internet, you could be in trouble, so he ran

You were in Ramshackle, in the living room, in the corner, crying and curled up into a ball like a roly poly

Idia had no idea what to do, opting to slap you to make you snap out of it. There must have been magic in that slap because it did get you to calm down a bit

Malleus Draconia

Also does not know about service animals, as no one in the palace ever required one, so pardon his curiosity

He asks questions to make sure that he doesn’t do anything to trigger your anxiety and so he is prepared for if your animal is trying to tell him something

That is how he knew to follow your animal when they came up to him in a hurry without you accompanying them

Come to find you in Ramshackle, curled up in the corner and hyperventilating while tears were streaming down your face

Malleus knelt down and pulled you into his chest while leading you in breathing exercises, using a calm tone

After a few moments, you were only sniffling and the panic attack was over, and Malleus felt as though he had aged 150 years

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rafeandonlyrafe · 6 months

Text

absolution

words: 10k

warnings: 18+ only! smut, panic attacks, parental loss, kidnapping, established relationship, descriptions of violence

follows the events of the end of season 2/start of season 3

“rafe, whats wrong?” you ask, taking his face in your hands. you can see how visibly on edge he is from the way his eyes are darting around, hands clenching into fists then unclenching rapidly.

“it’s okay, princess, nothing is wrong.” rafe says, using the pet name for you that he always does when he’s definitely done something wrong, like gotten into another fight. he steps out of your hold, which is what makes you realize something is actually going on. he never rejects your touch.

“babe…” you begin, but then you hear it, a distant call. your furrow your brow, turning towards the noise. “what is that?” you begin to walk deeper into the house when rafe stops you by grabbing your wrist, tugging you back against his body.

“don’t go down there princess.” rafe pulls you into a separate room but you hear it clearer now that you're listening for it, a call for help, very clearly in rafe’s sisters voice. it sounds like it’s coming from the wine cellar but you can’t be sure.

“sarah? what is happening to sarah?” you ask, turning to rafe with wide eyes, scared of what is going on. you weren’t sure what to think when rafe texted you late at night, telling you that he needed you at his house asap. you were already freaked out from the drive over, playing terrible situations in your head as your anxiety spiked.

“shh, calm down, baby. just let me explain.” rafe leads you away and your mind is spinning too much for you to think.

“rafe, i’m starting to get freaked out here-” you say, but when he leads you to sit down on the couch, you follow him. you’re sure your boyfriend has some sort of reasonable explanation as to what is going on here because no matter how bad people try to make him out to be, you know the man that you’re in love with isn’t capable of doing all those terrible things he’s accused of.

“shh, drink this tea to calm you down then i’ll explain, okay?”

you realize then that your breathing is too fast, so you accept the tea, taking a sip of the warm liquid, feeling it soothe your throat. you instantly start to feel that something is wrong, and you look up at rafe with hurt and confusion in your eyes.

“rafe-” you begin, and he quickly drops to his knees in front of you, hugging you as you begin to hyperventilate, “rafe, what did you do?” you ask, and your speech sounds slurred even to your ears.

“i’ve got you baby. i’ve got you. i’m so sorry, god, i’m so fucking sorry.” you see him kiss the side of your head but your skin is too numb to feel it. your vision begins to go out and then you slump forward, everything going dark as you lean against rafes shoulder.

your blinks are heavy as you feel the last bits of sleep slipping away. you let out a groan and turn into rafe’s hold, realizing you must be on a couch or something as your leg slips off the thin surface. you press your face against rafes chest when your ears make out unfamiliar sounds.

you go to sit up when rafe tugs you back down, but you still get a good enough view of where you’re at.

“rafe.” you turn to him, fury in your eyes. “what the actual fuck.”

“baby, i promise i can explain.” but you’re sick of waiting for an explanation that clearly isn’t coming if he had to drug you last time to get out of telling you. you rip out of his hold and stand up, wobbling slightly as the effets are still wearing off. you look around the room, it’s rusty and small and when your eyes land upon a window, that’s when you realize.

“we’re on a boat?” you turn to look at rafe, who is now sitting up. his gaze quickly drops, too ashamed to look at you.

“you drugged me and brought me onto a fucking boat?!” you scream, running your hands through your hair.

“i had to go, baby.” rafe stands up, trying to grab your hands but you back up away from him, not wanting to feel his touch. “i had to go and i didn’t want to leave you there all alone. i did it because i love you princess.”

rafe must be referring to the fact that your parents died two years ago in a car crash, and rafe was the only person you had to lean on. “fuck you, rafe.” you head towards the door. you turn around suddenly before opening it. “you want to know the worst part?” you continue on before rafe can answer, “is that you thought you had to drug me. that you didn’t trust me enough to just come with you. i love you, rafe.”

you walk away at that, slamming the door so rafe can’t follow, but you know he will anyway. you walk across the grated walkway, looking out and realizing you’re so far from land that there’s none in sight, even far off in the distance. you go to head down the stairs onto the main deck, when you bump shoulders with someone.

“ward?” your heart drops in your chest. he’s supposed to be dead.

“y/n, it’s good to see you.” he says, and you turn to look at rafe, who of course followed you, wondering how long he’s known. how long he’s sympathized with you over losing a parent, how he felt the pain that you had felt, how you were working through the loss together.

“don’t.” you tell rafe when he opens his mouth, tears welling up in your eyes. you turn towards ward, feeling so overcome with emotions. “i’m glad you’re alive.” it’s all you can get out before sobs take over. you turn and run down the stairs, glancing back onto to see ward stopping rafe from following you.

ward has always been nice to you. he helped you get your family home back in your name once your parents died by briefly owning it as part of his real estate business only to sell it back to you for a single dollar. it was when you and rafe first started dating and while you’re sure that had a part to play, he could have turned around and sold the house for almost a million dollars but still chose to help you out instead.

you head to the front of the ship, wanting to get as much distance as you can at the moment. you find a spot against a crate and slide to the ground, your legs still feeling wobbly from the drugs. you look out at the ocean, finding the way the sun reflects off the waves beautiful, but you wish you were viewing it under different circumstances. you’re not sure how much time passes, but suddenly a man comes over to you.

“are you a stowaway?” he asks. you look up at him in confusion. you’re honestly not sure if you are, you have no context as to why you are on this boat.

“why?” you choose to answer back. maybe coming out was a bad idea, but it didn’t seem like rafe was trying to hide at all.

“captain asked us to look for stowaways.” he explains, leaning down to examine you. “i think you should come with me either way, pretty thing.”

you’re honestly getting very hungry so while you don’t want to see rafe (or ward, even if you’re glad he’s not dead), you get up and follow the man towards the bridge. you also have no clue what he will do to you if you don't follow.

“if you are a stowaway, you’re the damn sexiest one i’ve ever seen.” the man tells you as you head up the stairs. your eyes widen and you’re glad he’s walking behind you to not see your expression as you rush up the final steps, opening the door to reveal who you assume is the captain and rafe.

“she is not a stowaway.” rafe puts a protective arm around you, and you let him as the man gives you a dirty look.

“well, excuse me for being thorough.” he holds up his hands in defense. the captain gives him a nod, and he leaves the room.

“sweetie-” rafe says, but you step out of his hold, as comfortable as it feels, how familiar it is to have your bodies touching.

“i’m hungry.” you tell rafe. it takes him a second to get moving, mumbling something to the captain about telling him if they find anyone before leading you out of the room.

he takes you to the mess area and you eat, almost unable to swallow as you hold back the thick tears that are threatening to spill. you give him plenty of silence to tell you what's going on, but he stays quiet instead.

“y/n-” rafe begins when you get up, but you walk away without a word. you head back outside, leaning against the railing.

you catch movement from below and look down to see sarah. “sarah, hey!” you call, relieved to see that she’s alright, but she looks up with a shake of her head and holds a finger over her lips. you nod in agreement. you don’t know what’s going on, but you’ve always liked sarah, despite becoming more distant once you started dating rafe.

a minute after she hurries away you see ward, scanning the deck with a glare on his face. you don’t know all the pieces of the puzzle, but you’re beginning to put a bit together. “ward!” you call out. he snaps his head up to you.

“i’m a little busy right now, y/n.” he says, going to wave you off, but you want to help sarah.

“it’s about sarah!” that gets his attention as he walks up the stairs quickly, taking them two at a time. “sarah? where is she, have you seen her?”

“n-no. i just wanted to ask if she was alright. she was yelling last time i saw her at tanneyhill.” rafe pinches his nose in between his fingers. “yes, she’s alright. i’m trying to find her to make sure she stays alright.” “okay, sorry.” you say, hoping your conversation gave sarah at least a little more time. you always admired her rebellious spirit, wishing you had some of it yourself.

the sun is just starting to lower in the sky when you hear a message playing over the loudspeaker “attention all passengers and crew, report to the tween forward hull… attention all passengers, all crew, report to the tween forward hull. that’s an order.”

you’re not exactly sure where the tween forward hull is, but you see a few other people walking quickly that way so you follow as the message plays again.

one of the men that you're guessing is crew opens a door, signaling for people to head inside. you follow the group, only pausing when you’re joined by the man who questioned you about being a stowaway earlier. he gives you a smirk that has your stomach turning. you stop suddenly, ducking into a doorway. you don’t want to be in a room with a bunch of strange men, and you don’t see rafe anywhere among the group.

you get a sudden feeling in your chest, one that’s all too familiar. you begin to panic, your hands shake and your legs give out. you slide to the floor as you feel the anxiety attack overtake your body. it’s been too much stress over the past 24 hours, you should have known that this was coming.

you can’t bring yourself to move as you rest your head against the cool metal, hoping you can get it to calm down on your own. if only rafe was here to make it all better. he could instantly lessen your panic with a soft touch and his sweet words.

you’re not sure how much time has passed by the time you can control your breathing. you stand up slowly, feeling your knees shake slightly. you head towards where the men were going but get confused. you head down a hallway, then another, then another, you’re not even sure if you’re retracing your own footsteps at this point or not. the panic begins to set in again when you push through a door and reveal that you’re outside. it’s completely empty from what you can see.

you head out, looking around when you see sarah by the lifeboats. “sarah!” you shout, running over to her. “what’s going on?”

sarah continues working to get the lifeboat into the water. you hear something and turn your head when you see the crane going. “sarah, please just tell me what’s happening.”

“i just…” sarah pushes her hair out of her face. “i just don’t have time, i’m sorry y/n.”

you step back as sarah starts to lower the lifeboat into the water, suddenly hearing yelling as you see the crane lifting a large golden cross. you leave sarah and head towards the commotion. you shouldn’t have run, you immediately regret it when you smack straight into people fighting. you realize quickly it’s jj and the captain, and the captain is holding a machete.

“are you one of them too?” he asks, and you don’t know what he’s referring to so you just stand there in silent shock. he suddenly knocks jj off and throws him overboard, and that gets you moving. kiara, who you just realized was there as well, gives him a kick, and you follow as well with a kick to his back. he falls down to his knees as kiara gives him a kick that should earn her a black belt, knocking him out.

you go to ask kiara what is happening, but she is diving over the edge. you look over to see that she’s holding a passed out jj above the water so he can breathe.

you head out onto the main deck right as a girl you don’t recognize drops the line holding the cross. rafe comes out from behind the crates to grab onto the rope.

“rafe!” you yell, running towards him. you go to help grab onto the line to help him, when suddenly the main rope connecting the cross to the crane is dropped and the rope pitches forward. your hand gets caught and before you can right yourself, you’re falling overboard. you tumble into the ocean, the sudden cold knocking the breath out of you.

it’s hard to tell which way is up as you swim, but you eventually break the surface.

you can hear rafe calling for you but you can’t focus on anything other than keeping your head above water. you’ve never been the strongest swimmer, despite growing up on the island.

“get y/n! she went overboard!” you can hear rafes yells even as the waves pound against your head.

you look up to see two more figures jumping overboard. “y/n!” you hear, and you turn to see sarah approaching in the lifeboat she was lowering earlier. you climb on with sarahs help, realizing pope is one of the people who jumped overboard.

you sit in shock against the bottom of the boat, hearing yelling but not being able to make anything out except for rafe yelling your name over and over again as another panic attack sets in.

the boat begins to speed away as you sit up in confusion. you don’t want to leave, you want rafe. that’s all you want. you see him look over the edge of the boat, yelling your name frantically.

“raaaafe!” you shout as the lifeboats engine stalls. you consider making a jump for it, returning to rafe, but you know that you would sink as you can barely move your limbs.

“y/n shut up!” you hear sarah yell, but you can’t focus on that right now as the engine comes back to life and you speed away from your boyfriend.

you lay your cheek against the rubbery side of the boat, letting sobs overtake your body as the boat gets smaller and smaller. “rafe.” you let out a little sniffle.

“god, y/n he’s not the guy you thought he was.” pope suddenly says. you turn to look at him, confused. “what?”

“he kept shit from you. bad shit. that cross? that belonged to my family and rafe stole it.”

“no, no, he wouldn’t do that.” you say, sitting up and wiping the tears off your face, even as sea water comes and splashes it, wetting your cheeks again.

“he drugged you, y/n, you’re not seriously sticking up for him right now?” sarah says.

“i’m just…” you realize that they’re all very pissed at rafe right now and you really don’t want to try your chances as you being thrown overboard. “i’m just confused right now. and exhausted.” “aren’t we all.” the girl you don’t recognize says. she sees your confusion and gives you a gentle smile, “i’m cleo.”

“y/n.” you mumble back, pulling your knees into your chest as the sun starts to set, making you shiver.

“y/n girl, it’s an island! you’re not going to be able to get it clean!” cleo says as you try to sweep the sand off of the makeshift floor out of felled tree trunks.

“it just makes me feel better.” you say, using the bundle of twigs you tied together as a makeshift broom.

“alright girl.” cleo holds her hands up. “well i’m heading down to the bonfire with everyone else. promise you’ll join us soon.”

“yeah, i will.” you nod. you finish cleaning the floor the best you can before you turn to yourself, grabbing the bucket of seawater you kept up here to put out fires and using it to rub the dirt off your arms and legs. you simply are not made for this type of living. you hate the bugs, you hate eating fish every night, you hate sleeping on the ground, and more than anything, you miss rafe.

“hey guys.” you say when you make it down to the beach, sitting on a log next to cleo, who you’ve gotten the closest to among the group. everyone else formed their little tribe, and it’s like you were the outsider, the only one wishing constantly for home. you thought you and sarah would get along more, but she spends all of her time with john b, pretending your don't exist, a constant reminder of her brother.

“what do you think rafe is doing with the cross now.” pope asks. you visibly jump at the name.

“pope, let’s not…” cleo says, reaching and squeezing your hand.

“i wonder if that fucker is melting them into gold bars as we speak.” pope continues.

“guys, stop.” cleo says more firmly as tears begin to roll down your face.

“she needs to hear this, cleo. it’s not right that she’s sitting here crying over a murderer.” jj stands up for his friend.

“i’m not!” you shout. “i know how you guys feel, damn you make it well known, but it’s hard for me to separate the man i loved, the only person who was there for me when my parents died, with the one that you know. so i’m fucking sorry if i’m sitting here crying over him, if i’m missing him. he was my rock, my everything, for years. i’m not saying you can’t talk shit about him, but at least have the decency to do it when i’m not around.”

you get up and walk away from the fire again, towards the water. the ocean has been your one solace while you are on the island. you’ve been practicing swimming every single day, and you even have tried some of the makeshift boards that john b made. you walk out just so your calves are submerged, closing your eyes under the moonlight as you feel the eb and flow of the waves coming in and then rolling out to sea.

you stand there for probably ten minutes before you hear the splashing of people joining you. you turn to see pope and jj standing there.

“we’re really sorry, y/n.” pope says, with jj nodding along. “it’s easy for us to forget that you didn’t know anything. we shouldn’t be upset at you and we will try not to talk bad about rafe while you’re around.” “thank you guys.” you say, giving them both a hug. you follow them back towards the bonfire, plastering a smile on your face as you sit and laugh at their jokes. it takes everything in you not to start crying again, but you know that they made a big step apologizing, and you need to show how much you appreciate it.

“guys wake the hell up!” you hear cleo say. you sit up suddenly, not really sleeping anyways, just laying on your makeshift bed.

“a plane.” you stand up suddenly as the rest of the crew starts to wake up. “there’s a fucking plane!” you yell.

“we have to make sure it sees us!” you yell, and start joining cleo in running to higher ground. you wave your arms and jump and scream as pope lights the bonfire.

“hey!” you shout as the plane starts to get further away. “no, no, no, no, fuck!” you scream, falling to the ground.

“girl, it’s turning around, get up!” cleo says, and you lift your head to see the plane heading towards the pond. you feel tears running down your face before you even realize you’re crying. you hug cleo as tightly as you can before taking off towards the plane.

you stay back as john b talks to the pilot. sarah gives you a look and you share the same one right back, this guy is sketchy, and the plane certainly isn't in good condition. the pilot introduces himself as jimmy and while you’re a little bit more apprehensive about getting on, cleo seems too excited for you to point out how weird he is to her, so you climb on.

you sit towards the back of the plane, happy to look out the window and keep to yourself. you just want to get back to the outer banks, back to your bed, and hopefully, back to rafe. despite everything the pogues have told you, you can’t damper the love you still feel for rafe. you know it’s messed up what rafe did, but you also know that everything he did was for the good of his family, and for you. he knows from seeing you lose your entire family in one moment how precious it is.

the others begin to whisper, and you lean in to listen. jj thinks that the pilot works for ward. they begin to look through his stuff, and you half heartedly join them, not understanding why they’re so upset. they’re still getting off the island either way.

once they find proof, they begin to form a plan. while jj attempts to put the proof back, jimmy sees, and turns around, letting go of the wheel. you scream as the plane begins to shake up and down. your heart begins to beat fast again as you look out the window in attempt to distract yourself and stop the oncoming panic attack, but all you see is the sea approaching way too fast as you drop altitude.

you accidentally fall into cleo, but she holds you close as the plane suddenly hits the water, going nose first. you black out for half a second before you realize how much water is flooding the plane. you kick open the door and begin swimming out, towards where men are gathering on the shore. you assume they are police and can help you get home.

you ignore any commotion going on behind you and focus solely on swimming towards the beach. you see kie pulling jimmy onto the shore and rush to help her. “kie…” you begin as you see four wheelers approaching you, who do not look friendly. “we gotta run.”

she nods and sets off towards the town, but theres so many people. “split up.” she whispers and you nod, running the opposite direction, but when you go to turn, you’re quickly snagged around the waist. you let out a shrill scream as you’re tossed into the back of a truck. you try to see if kiara gets taken as well, but you can’t tell.

you’re brought into a mansion, directed right up into a bedroom. you try to look around the place for kiara, but you don’t see her. you hope that means that she’s gotten away, but you can’t be sure. there were just so many men swarming the beach within minutes.

a couple of the guys ask you questions but you stay completely silent. you were hoping the men were police, but clearly there is a different power at play here.

“dinner at 8. get dressed.” the man who lead you to your room says before slamming the door. you look around at all the comforts you’ve lived without. you have no clue what time it is now, but you rush into the shower. you’ve been longing for one ever since you got onto that godforsaken boat. you strip down and scrub your skin clean, finally able to brush out your hair. you stay in the shower until the water starts to get cold.

you get out and while drying off find a pale blue dress and undergarments laid out for you. what kind of weirdo has this stuff already available you don’t know, but you get dressed anyways once you’re dry. you admire yourself in the mirror, finally seeing the version of yourself that you’re used to seeing.

you look at the bed but don’t dare sit on it, not when you know that you’d fall asleep and not want to get up from the plush surface. you watch out the windows, trying to memorize the movement of the armed men, until a maid opens the door.

“they’re ready.”

you nod and follow her downstairs nervously. she gestures to an open door and you see a man with his back to you, pouring himself a whiskey. your heart instantly feels a burst of pain as you think of how much rafe liked his whiskey, and then the man is turning around, and your heart doesn’t just burst, but shatters into a million pieces.

“rafe.” you sob, running towards him as he moves around the table to get to you.

“y/n, oh my god, baby.” rafe says, wrapping his arms around your waist.

“i’ve missed you so much.” you sob into rafe’s shoulder, letting your tears wet his suit. “i love you.” you pull away to look him in the eye. “i love you rafe.” because no matter what anyone else said, you do love him, with your whole heart.

“no baby, don’t so that.” rafe holds your face in his hands. “i don’t deserve your love for what i did for you. i’m so sorry baby.” he leans in and finally finally connects your lips in a kiss you melt against him, having thought about this moment the entire time you were apart.

“i love you too.” rafe says when he pulls away for a moment. you both go to resume the kiss when you hear footsteps. you take rafes hand in yours and turn to the door, eyebrows raising up when you see kiara. you were so sure she’d gotten away.

“kie-” you begin, but you see her eyes turn to rafes face, and then your joined hands.

she starts to yell, but a voice stops you. you just now realize there is a man in the connecting room.

“who are you?” rafe asks, and you step slightly behind him, squeezing his hand in fear.

“me? my name is carlos singh.” the man replies. “it’s a pleasure to meet you, mr. cameron, and your lovely girlfriend.” he gives a nod towards you before addressing kiara. “please, come sit down.”

“she doesn’t need to be here for this. please.” rafe says. carlos singh looks you over before giving a nod to the man by the door.

“no rafe, i want to stay with you.” you say, afraid of getting separated again.

“don’t worry, mr. cameron will be returned to your room.” singh says, and for some weird reason you trust him on that. while you wouldn’t trust him with anything else, he doesn’t seem like the person to lie. he’s got too much power to need to do that.

“i love you.” you tell rafe as the man places a hand on your arm, guiding you out of the room. you look back before the door shuts, seeing the hurt on kiaras face and the love on rafes.

you listen to kiara and rafe continuing to argue over the diary, like you have since they were dropped back off in the room you were in. they came and watched something by the window, but rafe made you stay back. you jumped when you heard a gunshot, and he quickly came back over to hold you tight to his chest, refusing to tell you what he saw.

“guys, can we just breathe for one second.” you say.

“i don’t even want to hear from your right now.” kiara says with an exasperated laugh. “i mean, we told you every shitty thing your boyfriend did and you just take him back like this?”

“don’t talk to her like that.” rafe says, and then they begin to argue again. you close your eyes, wishing you could drown out the noise.

“shut up!” you yell after a minute, unable to take it anymore. “just shut up. either kiara doesn’t know where the diary is or she isn’t going to tell you rafe. either way we are in the same position. we have to figure something else out.”

you’re delivered dinner a half hour or so later as you attempt to think of a plan. you eat in silence, sitting next to rafe while kiara is across the room. you’re convinced if you could just explain why you forgive rafe that she would understand it. just like she looks out for her family of pogues, rafe looks out for his family. but you’re not in the mood for anymore shouting and when night falls, you begin to prepare for bed after making a plan. no use trying to stay up all night in preparation for something and being too exhausted in the morning to make a move.

“here, baby, i found you pajamas.” rafe says, handing you some clothes so you could get out of your dress. kiara takes the other set into the bathroom and changes before you and rafe go in there together. he helps undress you, peppering kisses all over your body as he does so.

“i missed you so much.” rafe says. “i sent planes out every day to look for you. sorry this singh guy found you first.”

“it’s okay.” you soothe your hands over rafes shoulders, before bringing one up to the back of his head to feel his short cropped hair. “i knew you would look for me.”

“i never should have brought you along at all. it was selfish of me.” rafe pouts, but you kiss the frown off his face.

“your mistake was not telling me everything that happened when it happened. if i would have known, i could have helped. that’s the only reason i was upset. we could have made better decisions together.” “never keeping anything from you again.” rafe promises as you get dressed into your pajamas. rafe stays in his suit, not finding any clothes for him. you come out of the bathroom to see kiara is already on the couch, turned away with her back to you.

you watch as rafe lays down on the bed, pulling back the covers for you to get in next to him. you pause before you touch the sheets.

“what’s wrong?” rafe asks.

“it’s been… a month since i’ve slept in a real bed.”

“baby.” rafe sighs, taking your hand in his and tugging you gently. you finally lay down against the silky sheets, letting out a soft moan at the feeling of the mattress sinking underneath you. “i promise you’ll never have to sleep on the ground ever again.”

“rafe.” you turn to look at him in the darkness. “our priority has to be getting back to the outer banks, yeah? i want to go home. fuck the gold, fuck the diary, fuck it all. home, please.” “yes, of course, baby.” rafe says, pressing a kiss against your lips. “i’ll get you home, promise.”

“thank you.” you kiss rafe again, feeling that level of comfort and contentment that you’ve been missing. you let him bundle you into his arms, holding you close to his warm body.

“now tell me all about where you were.” “well, they called it poguelandia…”

“baby.” you feel rafe shake you. “babygirl, you gotta wake up.”

“mmm.” you hum and shake your head no. “don’t want to.”

“i know, princess, i promise i’m gonna get you home soon but kiara just left to talk to mr. singh and i don’t know whats about to happen.” the reality of your situation begins to set in. you sit up, realizing you’re not at home, happy in your own bed.

“so sorry, princess.” rafe says, giving you a kiss as you get out of bed, slipping your shoes on incase you have to run.

“kiara left?” you ask, rubbing your eyes as rafe finger combs through your hair.

“she went to talk to mr. singh. i don’t know what about but i need you to just be ready for anything. no matter what happens though, you keep yourself safe, okay? even if that means abandoning me.” “what? rafe no.” you shake your head, grabbing his hand. “i’m not letting us get separated again.”

“you have to, baby, if it means not getting hurt. i can’t lose you, okay? i already blame myself too much for holding that fucking cross up instead of diving in to save you. instead, they got you. that’s my fault.” “you didn’t know what was going on. you didn’t know they’d take me. you thought you’d get the cross secured and then you’d rescue me.”

“i should have prioritized you over that fucking gold.” rafe places a hand on your jaw, raising your head so you have to look at him. “don’t try to make it seem okay baby. its my biggest regret.” “after drugging me.” you whisper, then let your smile slip. it’s not funny by any means, but god, you’ve been through some shit and your only coping mechanism right now is a bit of humor.

“after that, yeah.”

you’re about to respond when kiara enters the room. “what happened, kie?” you ask, noticing she’s starting to cry. you leave rafes side to wrap your arms around her as she sits down on the couch. you’re surprised she doesn’t push you away.

“we aren’t getting out.” kiara finally says, picking her head up.

“we just need to work together.” you tell kiara, squeezing her shoulders. “we’ll be okay.”

“i’ve got a boat that can get us off the island. back home. we just have to get out of here.” rafe says.

you hear a car engine and all three of you rush to the window, seeing men pile up in the back of the truck bed. “they’re going to find john b.” kiara says.

“and sarah.” you look to rafe.

“as if he cares about sarah, he shot at her.” kiara says.

“what i did to sarah… what i tried to do… that was wrong. i never should have touched her, alright? i know that, so you don’t have to remind me.” rafe begins to pace, running his hand over his head as tears begin to fall. “she was family, i never should have touched her, but i just lose control in moments like that, i don’t know what happens, and im trying, im trying to get better.”

“we know, rafe, hey.” you stop his hand from hitting his own head. “hey, baby, we know.” rafe lets you wrap your arms around him, leaning to rest his head against your shoulder as you rub over your back. “i’ll help you work on it, i promise.”

you give kiara a pleading glance, hoping she will help rafe know that everyone doesn’t see him as a bad guy. “okay, rafe.” she nods.

“are you sure about this?” you ask rafe.

“yeah, get in the wardrobe. don’t come out until i get you like we planned.” rafe says, leading you into the bathroom.

“i can help, kie tell him” you say.

“no offense but it’s better if you stay in there.” “okay.” you concede, sitting in the wardrobe and closing your eyes as rafe closes the door and begins to stage the fight. you try to drown out the yelling, even though you know it’s fake.

you want to scream when you hear the guard and rafe fighting, but after a minute, the door opens and you rush out to see rafe unhurt.

you follow them out the room and down the stairs. you keep tight to rafe, trusting him to get you out and protect you.

“kiara, come on.” you whisper as she stops to take a picture of the painting on the wall. “kie.”

she stops typing and rejoins you as you head outside. rafe makes you stay back for a minute as he looks over the fence before kiara gets an idea and you all take off, running after a truck.

“come on, baby.” rafe says as you all climb over the fence. you barely make it to grab onto the truck, but when you do, the three of you are met face to face with a man sitting in the bed.

“rafe.” you say when he pulls himself up and over the side, punching the man in the face repeatedly. kiara helps you get all the way in.

“rafe!” you say again as the struggle continues, until rafe throws him out of the truck. “rafe, oh my god.” you say, seeing his true power for the first time.

“shh, baby it’s alright.” rafe sits down next to you, seeing how scared you are. “i had to do it for us, okay?”

you nod, but kiara doesn’t look convinced. “for us.” rafe repeats, putting his arm around your shoulders.

kiara peaks over the top of the truck. “we have to cover ourselves, guys. there’s a checkpoint.” thankfully there’s a tarp in the truck. you arrange it over top of your bodies, rafe lying almost completely over top of you, and you know it’s for your protection. you hold tightly to his arm as the car slows. thankfully they just take a quick look in the back before letting you through.

you let out a big sigh of relief when you make it through. “to the boat.” rafe kisses the side of your head. “we are heading to the boat.” he looks over you to kiara, and you nod at him. “kie, we can give you a ride out, drop you somewhere safe.”

“come on, kie, you don’t have a better option right now. i know you don’t trust rafe, but trust me.” you tell kiara.

“okay.” she whispers.

“go sit princess, i have to get us untied.” rafe tells you as you get onto the yacht.

you nod and sit on one of the deck couches, stretching your legs that are unused to so much running. “come on, kiara.” you call to her, noticing she’s still on the dock.

kiara stares at rafe as he heads to the helm, but eventually gets on. “can you get the bowline?” he asks her.

“i, i can’t get it.” kiara calls after a moment. “i need some help.”

you go to stand up but rafe stops you, rushing over to get it undone, not knowing how much time you have. as soon as it’s untied, kiara surges towards rafe, shoving him over the edge.

“kie!” you yell, running to the railing, but kiara stops you.

“us or him.” she says, and you know your answer as you jump overboard to join rafe. there’s no way you’re going to do anything to stop kiara. you understand her need to help her friends and don’t want to stand in the way. you trust rafe to get you off the island another way.

rafe starts yelling at kie as she drives the boat away, but calms down as you swim over to him. “it’s okay, rafe, we’ll figure it out.” you say, swimming towards the ladder on the dock.

“she took away my best opportunity to get you home, princess, you should be mad at her too.” rafe says, climbing out after you.

“she needs to rescue her friends… our friends. they’re mine too.” you’re not sure if they would agree with you, especially after kiara tells them that you’re back with rafe,

“they would hurt you if it meant getting ahead.” rafe says, grabbing your hand to lead you off of the dock. he needs time to formulate a plan, but here is not the place to do it.

you rip your hand out of rafes grip. “as if that isn’t all you’ve done to them. all they try to do is survive, and all you have done so far is take. for greed, as if you already aren’t rich enough. you’ve been terrible to them too. don’t act like everything is their fault and you’re innocent.” “why’d you come back then huh?” rafe asks, stepping close to you so you have to angle your head up to look him in the eye. “why’d you come back if you love those fucking pogues so much.” “i love you, not them. you want to get better? then you need to see the error in your ways. the things youve done wrong, but i am not going to leave you, especially not for them.” “fuck.” rafe groans, leaning his forehead against yours. “you're right. i’m sorry.”

you hear a commotion and pull away suddenly. “we gotta go.” rafe says, retaking your hand in his. you run off the dock and towards the town, hoping to be protected by the crowd.

you eventually find an alleyway that you can at least take the time to dry off in, letting the warm air and bright sun dry your clothes out.

“what’s the plan now, rafe?” you ask.

“you leave it to me, okay honey? i’m gonna figure out some food for you first.” “i can help.” you tell rafe. “i had to figure out how to survive without you, i am not completely incapable.” rafe rubs his eyes. “i know. i’ve just done so much to you already, i don’t want to put you through anything else. i love you, baby.” he kisses your forehead gently before holding you against his chest. you accept the hug, wrapping your arms around his waist while you simply enjoy that moment alone.

“i know you can help but stay here for just a minute, okay? i’m going to go swipe a wallet so we can buy some food. i know you’re hungry.”

there’s no denying that rafe is right, and while you feel bad having him take from a stranger, you really need it. rafe comes back only a few minutes later with a wallet in his hand and someone else’s hat on his head.

“got this for you.” he hands you a hat as well to help cover your face.

“what did you do?” you ask, noticing his bloody knuckles. “rafe-”

“please, don’t judge me for anything i do until you’re back home. i know you want me to get better but i can’t do that if either of us get retaken by mr. singh. okay?” “okay.” you whisper. “so are we getting food now?” “i’ve actually got a better idea.” rafe sticks his arm out for you to take and you accept it, curling your hand around his biceps as he leads you back towards the docks.

“just stand by me and be quiet and smiley okay? you’re my wife, mrs. tompkins.” you realize then that rafe is walking towards a cruise ship. your eyes are wide as you get in line, nervous you’re going to get caught, but you trust rafes charm.

“how you doing boss?” the man asks as rafe slides the hat off his head.

“good. how are you?” rafe asks as he hands over the stolen id, and you give the man the most even smile that you can manage.

“oh, living the dream.” he gives a nod at you. “you got some sun since you took this photo, man. there you go mr. tompkins, mrs tompkins.”

you’re relieved he doesn’t ask to see your id. you give him another smile as rafe leads you up the stairs. “holy fuck, rafe i can’t believe that worked.” “i know, we’re just gonna have to lay low, okay? i have hisvroom key but i’m sure they’re going to find a phone and call soon. we just have to hope that it’s after we reach the next port.”

“thank god.” you sigh as your foot finally lands on north carolina soil.

“we’re home.” rafe kisses your cheek, leading you towards a car that’s going to take you back to your house. rafe has been having people look after it, coming in once a week to clean and make sure nobody has broken in, but you’re only concerned right now about taking a long bath in your own tub and putting on your favorite pair of pajamas.

“i want to spend the next week inside my room.” you say excitedly as you sit down in the back seat of the car, rafe sliding in next to you.

“we can do that, princess.” he smiles, reaching across your body to do up your seatbelt. “i have some things i have to take care of, but you come first.”

“just promise me if you hear anything about john b or the pogues that you’ll help them out if you can. you owe that to them.”

“i will.” he squeezes your hand. “i promise.” you watch the familiar scenery as the car gets closer to your house, letting out a whimper when your own house comes into view. so many memories with your parents there all came flooding back, and you realize that you’re crying when rafe uses his thumb to wipe away your tears before helping you out of the car. he thanks the driver and leads you up the driveway, unlocking the door and then handing you the key, happy that it’s returning to your possession.

“hi mom, hi dad.” you whisper as you look at the picture of them placed on the entryway table. you pick it up and hold it close to your chest, and rafe must understand that you need a moment, waiting until you set the picture back down to lay a hand against your back, guiding you upstairs.

“will you get in with me?” you ask as you turn the bath on, finding everything in the same place it was when rafe called you over that night, except for the laundry that was piling up in your basket is done, you assume put away.

“of course.” rafe helps you concoct your bath, knowing exactly what you like in it. a hefty scoop of epsom salt, some drops of lavender oil, activated coconut charcoal and some organic flowers and herbs that you love to sprinkle in as well.

as the large tub is filling, rafe helps you undress, peeling your tshirt off of you and tossing it onto the floor. he presses a line of kisses across your collarbone before he connects your lips, reaching behind you to take off your bra. your own hands move to the buttons on his shirt, undoing them so you can slide it off his shoulders.

“sit down for me, baby.” rafe says, and you sit down on the stool in the bathroom, letting him kneel down and take off your shoes, carefully untying the laces and then taking your socks off as well. he rubs the sole of your foot with his thumbs for a minute before you stand up to finish undressing. rafe is quick to get himself nude as well as you take off your pants.

rafe slides himself into the bath first, letting you get in between his legs, thankful the tub is large enough to stretch out. you lean your head against his chest, closing your eyes and letting all of the tension out of your body.

“love you so much, my perfect girl.” rafe says, kissing the top of your head. you smile, a real, true smile that feels unfamiliar because of how long it’s been.

you both grow silent, occasionally moving just to readjust. you take rafes hand in yours after a couple minutes, lacing your fingers together.

“rafe… did they clean my parents room?” you ask.

“no.” he shakes his head. “i told them to leave it alone, not even to dust.”

“thank you.” you whisper, closing your eyes and letting the bath soothe your sore muscles. you know eventually you need to venture into their space, but it’s still too fresh for you. you also know that when it is time, you’ll have rafe by your side.

rafe brings his hand up to your shoulders, and you sit up a bit as he massages them, and then down to your back. rafe always takes such good care of you, you see every good thing inside of him that he only lets you view.

you turn around suddenly, pressing your lips against rafes. “you’re not a bad guy.” you tell him.

rafe goes to shake his head, but you stop him. “you’re not a bad guy, rafe. a bad guy would have left me when my parents died and i wasn’t able to get out of bed for a month. a bad guy wouldn’t care so deeply for his family that he’d do anything for them. you’re not a bad guy. i see your heart.”

rafe tugs you onto his lap, holding you close to his body, letting a few tears fall. “i see you.” you whisper, wrapping your arms around him. you stay close until the bathwater starts to cool down. you finally pick your head up and give rafe a gentle smile.

you both get out of the bath and rafe insists on drying you off, gently patting the towel over your arms, torso, and then legs. you quickly blast your hair with a hairdryer just so it isn’t completely wet for bed.

it’s so natural, this routine with rafe. it's almost like the past two months never happened, like your life was never changed forever that night he texted you.

you head into the bedroom, rafe following quickly behind you. you get out your favorite pair of matching pajamas. your parents had a tradition of gifting you pajamas every christmas eve, and it continued all the way up until you were an adult. your favorite pair is now the last pair they will ever get to give you. you hug them close to your chest but don’t put them on yet. while you’ve reconnected with rafe, there’s a way that you haven’t reconnected yet that you’ve been craving, needing to finally feel right again.

“baby, we don’t have to.” rafe says as you set your pajamas down on the nightstand for after.

“i want to rafe. i want you.” you kiss him, pressing your bare body against his.

“if you’re too tired…” rafe begins, even as you feel him swelling against your abdomen.

“i’m not. i promise. i need this rafe.”

“on the bed then, princess.” rafe says. you smile and let yourself fall onto the bed, arranging your head so it’s on the pillows. even though you’ve slept in a bed since you left, there’s nothing like your own. you can practically feel the way it molds into your body.

rafe hovers at the edge of the bed like he’s steadying himself mentally as he looks over your body, the scar on your hip from when you fell on the island bringing a whole new pang of guilt, but he pushes it down, for you.

“my goddamn perfect girl.” rafe says, getting on top of you and kissing your lips, gently at first, before deepening the kiss. you groan when he pulls away after a minute. you could kiss him forever, but he quickly makes up for it by kissing along your jaw, then your neck, taking the time to suck a hickey onto the sensitive skin.

you shiver at the feeling of getting marked by him. rafe continues lower, taking your breasts into his hand as one of his tongues laves over your nipple, hardening it into a stiff peak before sucking it between his lips. here closes his eyes and relishes in the feeling and the taste of your soft skin.

he keeps his tongue against your chest as he switches to the other side, repeating the action on that breast. he takes a second to press his head against your chest, right over your heart. he listens to your heartbeat, the one that he almost lost because of his actions. he turns his head and presses a kiss there. a silent vow. to never put you in harms way again.

he moves lower, laying himself between your legs. he takes a moment to rub his thumb over your scar. it’s just a light pink scrape now, made by a sharp but small rock. rafe kisses it as well. he would kiss every inch of your body if he wasn’t so drawn to between your legs.

he knows he should be more patient. more gentle, but when you spread your legs wider for him, he presses his tongue directly against your core, lapping up every drop of wetness that had gathered. you let out a moan at the sudden feeling, not expecting rafe to dive into your pussy that quickly.

“love this taste.” rafe mumbles before licking over your clit. hes going to take his role as a boyfriend even more seriously after what he put you through. give you every ounce of pleasure that he can, and even that won’t make up for what he did. not in his mind. he will be forever trying to apologize.

“rafe, oh my god.” you moan as he sucks on your clit like it’s his favorite candy before flicking his tongue over it. it’s been so long since you’ve had any action that you know you’re bound to cum too soon, but you have plenty of time to go at it over and over again with rafe now that you’re home.

rafe presses a finger against your entrance, not wanting your hole to feel left out as he pays special attention to your clit. he looks up at you for permission, and you give him a quick nod.

rafe takes your clit back in his mouth as he begins to press in, feeling your tight warmth envelop his digit. he keeps it still inside of you for a moment, not sure how much extra attention and time you will need before taking his cock. you haven’t gone a week without sex since you started dating, it’s certainly different now and he doesn’t want to accidentally put you through any pain.

he waits until your body relaxes completely before he starts to pump his finger inside and out. in an effort to not overwhelm you, he gives your clit a kiss and then turns his attention to your thighs, giving them some love as well. you appreciate the break in the stimulation, knowing you would have cum far too quickly for your liking.

“hows it feel? we can stop.” rafe asks, checking in on you.

“no, don’t stop.” you say, gripping the bed sheets. “add a second finger, please.”

rafe smirks, loving that you’re as desperate for him as he is for you. he is careful about adding a second finger, letting the thumb of his other hand rub over your clit ever so slightly as he does so, that way you stay relaxed.

when he finally gets both fingers pumping inside of you, he can’t resist the urge anymore, licking around his fingers to collect as much of your slick as he can on your tongue. he wasn’t kidding when he said he loves your taste.

“raaafe.” you moan, having resisted the urge to direct him to what you want, but you can’t anymore, taking his head in your hands and guiding his mouth to your clit. you feel rafe smirk against you for the briefest moment before his mouth parts and sucks your bud in between his lips.

you close your eyes, as much as you want to enjoy the sight between your legs, you’re simply in too much pleasure. rafe keeps his sucking soft at first, but he intensifies quickly, needing to be inside of you.

“close!” you warn rafe. it’s all you can do before he has you cumming, hips lifting off the bed as your body shakes, muscles tightening as he continues to pump his fingers through your orgasm. stars shine in your eyes as you blink them open, looking down as rafe gives your clit a few more kitten licks.

“are you ready for me?” rafe asks. you wanted to ride him originally, but your body is so blissed out you know you’re not capable of it.

“ready, rafe.” you say with a nod. he drapes himself over your body, sliding his cock over your soaked pussy, coating himself in your juices.

“shh.” rafe tells you when you let out a whine, wanting him to hurry up. “be patient pretty baby.”

fuck patience, you think to yourself, reaching down and taking rafes thick cock in your hand, pressing the head against your entrance. he takes over from there, your hand dropping away as he presses inside of you. you moan at the feeling of pure togetherness. rafe lets out a deep moan as he pushes all the way in.

“just… hang on for a sec, babe.” rafe says, closing his eyes and taking deep breaths as he controls his sudden urge to immediately cum, but he knows he has to give you your pleasure first.

you accept rafes kiss when he bends down to connect your lip, letting out a sudden moan when he begins to move, thrusting in and out of you at a rapid pace.

“fuck, yes, yes.” you cry out. you grip onto rafes shoulders, hoping you don’t hurt him as you squeeze tightly, needing to hold onto him as his hips press into yours.

rafe lets out a series of moans as you tighten your pussy around him. you’re so sensitive, the way he is hitting your clit with every thrust.

rafe presses his lips to your neck, more using it as a block for his constant moans than to actually kiss it. you close your eyes, relaxing into the feeling, the feeling of being joined together with rafe, of seeking pleasure in each others bodies.

“gonna take care of you babygirl.” rafe says, and you know he means more than just bring you to your orgasm.

“never gonna hurt you ever again.” the intensity of his thrusts increase, bringing you closer and closer to the edge.

“never gonna let anyone else hurt you ever again.” he gives your neck a nip with his teeth. “you’re mine.” a hard thrust. “you’re mine to protect.”

he brings his head up so he can connect your lips together, letting all of his passion and frustration out in your kiss. “you’re mine to love.”

“i love you, rafey.” you tell him. you never want to stop telling him.

“i love you, baby.” rafe says, wrapping his arms around your waist as his thrusts increase, pressing so deep and hard into your body that you feel like you’re splitting open.

you drop a hand to rub at your clit when you feel his cock start to pulse, signaling that he’s close.

“cum in me.” you ask rafe. you haven’t been able to take your birth control, but you’ll have him run out and get you a plan b in the morning. you need to feel him fill you up.

“are you sure?” rafe asks, face straining and veins popping as he holds back his quickly incoming orgasm until you give a nod of approval. rafe explodes in a burst, letting out loud moans and grunts as he rocks his hips into yours. the second you feel his warm cum, you also cum, fingers rubbing aggressively over your clit as it pulses, sending shocks of pleasure over your body.

you come down from your orgasm together, rafe slowing his hips and the eventually pulling out, smiling as he watches his cum start to drip out of your pussy, but he cleans it with a towel on your bedside table before it can get the sheets anymore dirty.

“want me to clean you up?” rafe asks as you stretch, knowing you need to go pee.

“i can do it.” you kiss rafe gently before heading into the bathroom. once you’ve taken care of your business you head back out, giggling at rafe already having his eyes closed and head against the pillow. you pull on your christmas pajamas before laying down next to him.

rafe tugs you tight to his body, letting you rest your head against his chest. “i love you rafe.” you tilt your head so you can kiss his bare skin. “thank you for getting me home.”

“i love you more, princess.”

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